Thursday, August 16, 2001

1:01🔗 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13🔗 Voiceover It's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Dr. Drew, board-certified internist, addiction medicine specialist, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. It is my pleasure to welcome back to the show Tony and Wayne from Static X.

1:30🔗 Static X It's our pleasure to be welcomed back.

1:31🔗 Yeah, me too.

1:33🔗 Adam Well, I'd like to say thank you for having the pleasure of me welcoming you back to the show.

1:39🔗 It's a pleasure.

1:40🔗 Adam The new CD is called Machines. It is out. It shipped gold, which is nice. That means the record stores wanted enough of them for it to go gold before you ship them.

1:52🔗 You are correct, sir. Yeah.

1:54🔗 Adam And do they eat those if they don't sell them? Not that they wouldn't, but...

1:58🔗 I don't think so. They end up either going back or in a cutout bin somewhere. So they are careful about how many of the order.

2:04🔗 Adam Well, what I'm saying is...

2:06🔗 Drew Let's send them back.

2:07🔗 Adam What I'm saying is, is can it... What if a record shipped gold, they didn't sell as many as they thought they were going to sell, and then they gave them back?

2:17🔗 Static X Well, here's the classic example. Remember when Kiss and they all put out their own solo records?

2:23🔗 And they all shipped gold?

2:24🔗 Static X Yeah.

2:24🔗 Adam Right.

2:25🔗 And they ended up in cutout bins?

2:26🔗 Right.

2:27🔗 Adam Right.

2:27🔗 I think basically they didn't sell squat.

2:29🔗 Drew They don't then claim to be a gold record.

2:31🔗 Adam They wouldn't?

2:32🔗 Drew No.

2:32🔗 Adam Well, but this is gold anyway, right?

2:35🔗 Of course it will be.

2:36🔗 Adam Shipped gold, good enough.

2:36🔗 I think it's close. I think it's close. I don't think it actually shipped gold, but very close.

2:40🔗 Adam The first CD went platinum. I'm reading here, which is very nice. And I got to believe we had some small part in that, Drew, having them on the Loveline that way. Of course.

2:48🔗 Oh, yeah, sure.

2:50🔗 Adam Oh, absolutely. Yeah. We will, I'll give you some dates and we'll hear something off the new CD and all that stuff. You guys are doing the Family Values Tour?

3:01🔗 Static X Yeah.

3:02🔗 Adam Yeah. But we're not sure when yet.

3:05🔗 It's mid-October.

3:07🔗 Static X Yeah.

3:07🔗 It starts. I think it ends in LA around Thanksgiving.

3:10🔗 Static X Yeah.

3:11🔗 Adam What are we in? Are we in like year four for that? I mean.

3:16🔗 Sounds right.

3:16🔗 Adam Aren't these new, Dr. Drew, you know these tours we keep thinking are brand new? Yeah. That are going into their eighth and ninth year?

3:24🔗 Drew Yeah, Pops.

3:24🔗 Adam Yeah. I mean, doesn't that freak out a little bit?

3:27🔗 Drew Yeah.

3:28🔗 Adam Yeah. I mean, wasn't Family Values, wasn't that just like Korn from about four or five years ago?

3:33🔗 Static X I think Korn did it like two years.

3:35🔗 Adam Did they start it?

3:36🔗 Static X Yeah. I guess so.

3:37🔗 They still like own the tour type of deal, I think. And they still have like, you know, saying who's on the tour.

3:44🔗 Drew What happened to Korn? They never come around here anymore.

3:46🔗 Adam No, they're coming out. I talked to their manager at the Weenie Roast, and they're coming out with a new CD or they're going in the studio soon, and then they'll come in here. I don't know. I haven't heard from them. I haven't seen them too much. All right, so Static X here. We'll hear something off the new CD. I'll give you some dates coming up where you can find them in a city or town near you, and we'll take some phone calls. Dustin?

4:13🔗 Yo, what up, dawg?

4:14🔗 Adam You're 21.

4:16🔗 Caller Yeah, I made up my question, man, but I do got a question for you, though. Okay. Like, I smoke a lot of weed, man. And I want to know, like, what's that going to do to me in, like, 20 years, man?

4:29🔗 Drew 20 years of Daily Pot? What's that going to do to you?

4:31🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, you nothing, but a regular guy would feel the effects of it. I don't believe Dustin can sink any lower.

4:37🔗 Drew Well, like with any addiction to Dustin, what will happen is they'll start being mounting consequences in your life. Now, typically what happens is people get depressed with this drug. The sort of the history of marijuana dependency is it works for a while, then it stops working, and then you start getting depressed, then you smoke more to try to deal with the depression, since that's really why you've been using the pot in the first place, is try to regulate your feelings.

4:58🔗 Caller Well, I mean, but like when I was young, like a few years ago, I used to drink a lot, I used to get a lot of trouble, and ever since I started smoking blood, I ain't been in no trouble.

5:06🔗 Static X That's fine.

5:07🔗 Drew That's a separate issue. We've always, was it House of Pain? Who are the guys that we were opposed to? Cypress Hill.

5:12🔗 Static X Right.

5:12🔗 Drew Cypress Hill made that case for us here a couple of times. They were all hopped up when they were younger, and now they look like a.

5:17🔗 Adam Right. They're reliant.

5:18🔗 Drew You have to poke them with a stick to get them going.

5:20🔗 Adam They're like, be real. It's like, oh, I'm going to rape you and murder you tomorrow. I got some TV to watch tonight.

5:28🔗 Drew You'll start accelerating the use. You'll get more depressed. You'll switch back to alcohol or find something like speed.

5:32🔗 All right.

5:33🔗 Adam But given a choice between a young hooligan like Dustin, by the way, how do you get the name Dustin?

5:39🔗 Drew Made that up too.

5:40🔗 Adam Must be like Angel Dust or something.

5:43🔗 Static X It's probably spelled all funny too.

5:44🔗 Right.

5:45🔗 Static X Right.

5:45🔗 Adam There's some apostrophe hand at the end. But between him being loaded and him being stoned, you're going to pick stone every time, right?

5:53🔗 Drew Between alcohol and pot?

5:54🔗 Caller Yeah.

5:55🔗 Drew You made that point reasonably. Of course.

5:57🔗 Adam It subdues you.

5:58🔗 Drew Yeah. It's not an aggressive drug. It doesn't make a deal with you necessarily. The lesser of two evils? You wouldn't want them on speed or cocaine. That's for sure.

6:07🔗 Adam Not at all. I remember once I heard this story about a boxer who got his title stripped from him because he drug tested after the fight. They found traces of marijuana in his system. And I was like, give the guy another belt. I mean, if this guy had traces of THC, whether he was getting baked on the way to Madison Square Garden or maybe he just smoked a little weed earlier in the week, anyway, you slice it. Come on. Give the guy another belt. You know what I mean? Like, that's going to enhance your performance. Imagine being stoned and going 12 rounds.

6:39🔗 Drew I'm wearing a weight belt.

6:41🔗 Colleen?

6:42🔗 Caller Hi. Okay. It's not just me. It's my friend Laura, too.

6:45🔗 Caller All right.

6:46🔗 Caller Oh, my God. All right.

6:47🔗 Caller Hey, Laura.

6:48🔗 Caller Basically, our friend Lindsay, we're really worried about her because she's doing...

6:53🔗 Wait.

6:54🔗 Caller She can't hear this, can she? Like, the guy said he was going to call her, but can she hear this?

6:59🔗 Drew Have you called her yet, the girlfriend? No, no. He's talking to her right now. Oh, God.

7:03🔗 Caller Okay.

7:03🔗 Drew Oh, really?

7:04🔗 Oh, God.

7:05🔗 Drew So you better talk while he's talking to her.

7:07🔗 Caller Okay. Well, basically, like, we're really worried about her because she goes to, like, a tanning bed, like, every single day for, like, a really long time, like, 30 minutes, and she does, like, a whole lot of other really self-destructive, like, behaviors.

7:18🔗 Like, she's, like, we think she's anorexic, maybe, like possibly bullying.

7:21🔗 Caller She, like, compulsively exercises, like... All right.

7:24🔗 Drew Have you confronted her?

7:25🔗 Adam Let me translate this. Lindsay's hot, Colleen and Laura Pork is...

7:29🔗 Caller No.

7:29🔗 Adam And they get nudged.

7:30🔗 Caller Laura, Laura, stop. Laura, stop. Laura, stop.

7:33🔗 Drew Yeah, don't even engage Adam, Laura. Just relax.

7:35🔗 Adam She's skinny and tanned.

7:36🔗 Drew Let me break.

7:37🔗 How fat could she be?

7:41🔗 Drew Listen, have you guys brought this up to her?

7:43🔗 Caller Well, see, okay, this is the thing. Like, she's on a little weight, and she's worried about it.

7:48🔗 Drew Hey, hey, Colleen, Laura, have you brought this up to her? Yeah. What does she say?

7:54🔗 Caller She's like, oh, well, everybody dies anyway. And we're like, oh, boy.

7:57🔗 Static X Well, is she single?

8:00🔗 Drew What?

8:00🔗 Static X Is she single?

8:01🔗 Adam Tony's interested.

8:02🔗 Static X Yeah, yeah, yeah.

8:03🔗 Drew So is there any adult you could talk to that might get her some help?

8:06🔗 Caller Well, no, but that's not even like the main problem. The main problem is that there's this guy who she, like, met on the Internet, and, like, he went to the school she goes to now. But he got kicked out for some, like, mysterious reason that no one knows about.

8:19🔗 He got kicked out the year before she came.

8:21🔗 Caller She's 16. He's 19.

8:22🔗 Adam He's a knife thrower.

8:23🔗 Caller What?

8:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

8:26🔗 Adam Go ahead.

8:26🔗 Static X Well, he's 19, and he got kicked out of high school?

8:29🔗 No, no, no, no. He's 19 now.

8:31🔗 Static X Wait a minute. You're supposed to get kicked out after.

8:34🔗 He got kicked out, like, two years ago.

8:35🔗 Adam I see.

8:36🔗 Caller Right.

8:37🔗 Adam Okay. So he may be a trouble maker.

8:39🔗 Static X That's called graduating.

8:40🔗 Caller Right. So anyway, they met on line, and, like, she's, he wanted to meet her for pizza or something. So we're like, okay, we don't think this is a good idea. So then now we're talking to her on line, like, a little while ago, and she's like, yeah, he actually made reservations for a dinner cruise.

8:52🔗 Drew Listen, are her parents available to be spoken to, or are they sort of a pain in the neck?

8:56🔗 Caller Well, they're, like, divorced. Her dad's in, like, Hawaii with his girlfriend.

9:00🔗 Drew And how about mom? Is she available?

9:02🔗 Caller She, like, works all the time, I guess.

9:04🔗 Adam Does her crotch smell at all?

9:07🔗 Drew Let's try to help. Come on.

9:08🔗 Adam Well, they're just talking so much smack about it.

9:10🔗 Drew But they're worried about her.

9:12🔗 Adam They're worried about her in a kind of catty way, though, wouldn't you say?

9:15🔗 No, we're really not.

9:17🔗 Caller No, look, I know this sounds bad, like, we're jealous of her because she's, like, 10 and 10, but it's really not like that. Like, I promise, like.

9:23🔗 Adam Are you guys have boyfriends?

9:24🔗 Caller Well, I did, but he moved to Texas.

9:26🔗 Adam Shocking. Shocking.

9:28🔗 Caller What?

9:28🔗 Adam What about you, Laura?

9:29🔗 Drew Moved or fled?

9:30🔗 Caller No, not, not, not.

9:32🔗 Adam Moved or jumped, jumped, chased a speeding train and jumped on the back of it. No boyfriends between the two of you?

9:40🔗 Caller No, not we.

9:41🔗 Adam Oh, I'm floored.

9:42🔗 Drew All right, here's what you guys need to know. You can't change her behavior, okay?

9:45🔗 Caller I know, but I know we're just worried about, like, what's going to happen tomorrow night, like, we don't want to be killed or anything, because she's going in the same car with this guy.

9:52🔗 Drew Oh, that's bad. I know. Can't you alert some adult to this? Can't you tell someone so she's...

9:57🔗 Caller I don't know who to tell, like, we don't want to tell our parents because, like...

10:00🔗 Drew That may be important to tell them.

10:02🔗 Adam Why is she so desperate?

10:03🔗 Caller I don't know.

10:04🔗 Drew She's acting out. She's acting. It's all part of that sort of syndrome, right? She's acting out sexually, she's acting out aggressively, she's acting out of eating disorder.

10:11🔗 Adam Okay. Why don't you guys, why don't you, uh, chaperone her on the date, like, a trailer in a golf cart or something?

10:19🔗 Static X Jump in the trunk of the car.

10:21🔗 Adam Right.

10:21🔗 Caller She has this friend here, like, met some guy online, and now they're looking in love or something, apparently. So, like, she... Her friend, like, is advising her to do this.

10:27🔗 Drew Oh.

10:27🔗 Adam All right.

10:28🔗 Drew We were able to get Lindsay on the phone here.

10:30🔗 Adam All right. How do we do this, Drew?

10:31🔗 Caller We kill us.

10:33🔗 Adam Hold still, girls, please. Do either one of you think I'm cute, by the way?

10:37🔗 Caller I do. I think you are so cute. I look at you all the time.

10:40🔗 Adam You're out of the dog house. How do we get Lindsay on?

10:43🔗 Drew Let's put them in hold and talk to Lindsay. Put Lindsay on the bottom row.

10:45🔗 Really? Really?

10:47🔗 Adam Hey, Lindsay?

10:49🔗 Drew Lindsay?

10:51🔗 Adam All right. Lindsay, are you there?

10:53🔗 Yeah.

10:54🔗 Drew There she is.

10:55🔗 Adam We have your friends Colleen and Laura on the line. They're worried about you.

11:00🔗 Drew You're meeting up with some guy tomorrow night you've never met and he's mysteriously been thrown out of a school and you met on the Internet, right?

11:07🔗 Well, yeah. I have friends that know him.

11:11🔗 Caller You do?

11:12🔗 Yeah.

11:12🔗 Adam They've met him in prison?

11:15🔗 Caller No.

11:17🔗 Drew Don't you think it's a little bit dangerous to really just suddenly go out with someone you don't know is an adult when you're 15?

11:23🔗 Caller I'm not 15. I'm almost 17.

11:25🔗 Drew Almost 17. I beg your pardon.

11:26🔗 Adam Wow, that's different. Right. All right. Well, she's full grown. And what friends of yours know him?

11:34🔗 Caller Well, we go to a really small private school and we have big sisters and little sisters and stuff and my big sister went out with him.

11:43🔗 Adam All right. What did she say about him?

11:44🔗 Caller He was a sophomore.

11:45🔗 Drew What did she say about him?

11:46🔗 Caller Oh, she's still friends with him, but she already left her college so I can't get in touch with her.

11:52🔗 Drew He was kicked out of your school? Is that right?

11:54🔗 Caller He wasn't kicked out. He left for personal reasons.

11:56🔗 Drew What were those personal reasons?

11:57🔗 Adam He raped someone.

11:59🔗 Caller No.

12:00🔗 Drew A knife throwing accident again?

12:02🔗 Caller I don't know what they were.

12:03🔗 Adam All right. You know the guy sort of then?

12:07🔗 Caller No. I never met him.

12:09🔗 Drew Aren't you a little worried about that?

12:13🔗 Caller I'm usually not the kind of person to do this, but I don't know.

12:18🔗 Drew Well, Lindsay, take some sort of safeguard.

12:22🔗 Adam Take some pepper spray. And what about the eating disorder? What's going on with that?

12:27🔗 Drew That mom walked in?

12:28🔗 Caller What?

12:29🔗 Adam What about the eating disorder?

12:32🔗 Caller What eating disorder?

12:32🔗 Adam Do you got something going on in that department?

12:36🔗 Caller Not really.

12:38🔗 Adam Not really? Just sort of?

12:41🔗 Drew Do you have a purge?

12:43🔗 Adam Hold on. Hold on. Her mom, I think her mom like came in. This is going on for 20 minutes, Drew. I can't handle this anymore. Do you really care?

12:52🔗 Drew I care, but I don't know if we can do much, you know?

12:55🔗 Adam Look, I don't take this the wrong way, but so a 16-year-old chick could snuff. Do you never met her before? You know what I'm saying? It happens every day.

13:04🔗 Static X If we're lucky, it'll show up on the news tomorrow.

13:06🔗 Adam Right. It's not like you're going to do any time.

13:08🔗 Drew It's better than what we had thought, right? She kind of knows the guy. She knows who knows the guy. Her friends need to get her to someone who can take care of her. The eating disorder is not going to get better without treatment. They can't change it. They got to get her or find an adult who can leverage her in.

13:25🔗 Adam Tony and Wayne are here, by the way, from Static X. Adam?

13:28🔗 Yeah.

13:29🔗 Adam You're 15?

13:30🔗 Caller Yep.

13:30🔗 Adam What's up?

13:32🔗 Caller I got two things. First, I want to ask for yours and Drew's blessings because I'm getting married sometime around Christmas.

13:40🔗 Adam Mazel Tov.

13:44🔗 Drew How do you pull that off at 15?

13:48🔗 Caller One of the parents on either side has to sign.

13:51🔗 Drew Just one?

13:52🔗 Caller Yeah.

13:52🔗 Drew The other commits suicide.

13:55🔗 Adam Only one gets to sign.

13:57🔗 Caller The other one really doesn't have to.

14:00🔗 Adam Wow. So, who signed? Hers or yours?

14:03🔗 Caller We're not married yet, but my dad's going to sign after he gets out of jail.

14:07🔗 Static X Oh! I'm thoughtful of him.

14:11🔗 Adam Dad, I need a favor. When are you paroled? In January. No, that'll work.

14:16🔗 Static X I'll post bail if you do this little favor for me.

14:19🔗 Drew Adam, what's the hurry?

14:20🔗 Adam Dad, you want a carton of cigarettes and some porn?

14:22🔗 Yeah, man.

14:23🔗 Adam I'm glad I got your attention.

14:25🔗 Now listen up, pops.

14:26🔗 Drew Adam, what's the hurry? Why marriage?

14:29🔗 Caller Because I'm in love with her and she's in love with me and just one night I just.

14:34🔗 Adam That's right.

14:35🔗 Caller Now.

14:35🔗 Static X Dude, you're 15.

14:37🔗 Adam No, I know. But why waste your teen single? You know? Exactly. Best to tie the knot, get started.

14:43🔗 Drew Who is she running away from?

14:44🔗 Adam Start a family.

14:45🔗 Caller She's running away from nobody.

14:47🔗 Drew Oh, please.

14:48🔗 Caller I'm going to see my mom. She's somewhere in Florida and my dad's in prison. My stepdad kicked me out the house. I hopped a train to Georgia to stay with friends.

14:58🔗 Drew Oh, my God.

15:00🔗 Adam Wow. And can you hop trains now? Can you still do that?

15:05🔗 Caller Well, I didn't hop a train.

15:07🔗 I paid for a ticket.

15:08🔗 Adam Oh, I see.

15:09🔗 Caller You can still hop trains. I used to do that over on Main Street.

15:13🔗 Adam Oh, Main. And so your dad, what's he in prison for?

15:18🔗 Caller Being an idiot, he was driving on a suspended license, fake drive out tag, no proof of insurance, and a probation violation from 12 years earlier for passing bad checks.

15:30🔗 Drew I guess he had a probation violation.

15:31🔗 Adam Right.

15:31🔗 Caller He was speeding.

15:32🔗 Adam Okay. You see your dad's kind of an idiot. And he'll be out soon?

15:37🔗 Caller Kind of an idiot. Yeah. He'll be out in like October or something like that.

15:42🔗 Static X No wonder he's signing this damn thing.

15:44🔗 Caller Right.

15:45🔗 Drew That was the first encouraging thing Adam said, by the way.

15:47🔗 Adam Yeah. But you know, Adam...

15:48🔗 Drew Righteous indignation at his father's behavior.

15:51🔗 Adam Adam sort of sounds like his mind functions pretty well, and it sounds like he's got his head screwed on okay for someone who's been through what he's been through.

16:00🔗 Caller Wait till you hear what my second question is.

16:02🔗 Adam Go ahead.

16:04🔗 Caller I have this kind of thing like piercing thing. I've got like a crap load of piercings and things like that. I love to pierce myself. Right. I mean, on my legs and on my arms and things like that.

16:15🔗 Drew Piers or mutilate?

16:17🔗 Caller Yeah.

16:17🔗 Drew You're cutting.

16:19🔗 Caller Yeah. The other night I was at a party and burnt like six cigarettes out of my arm.

16:25🔗 Drew Okay.

16:26🔗 Caller All right. I want to know what's like my drive or whatever.

16:30🔗 Drew What are you doing with that? There are various theories about that. One way to think of it is that your brain has all these overwhelming feelings it's carrying around and doesn't have any way to manage them. When they really start coming to the surface, one of the things you can do to avoid having them or to manage them is to distract yourself. I suspect the other part of this is that you've been through some very, very intense experiences in your life. And in order, the way your brain chemistry alters from that trauma, sometimes people will use arousal as a way of managing feelings so these feelings of the trauma don't surface.

17:08🔗 Caller Yeah, I'm ashtrayed a lot.

17:10🔗 Drew So you were sexually abused too?

17:12🔗 Caller Oh, no.

17:13🔗 Adam What about my no ashtray theory?

17:16🔗 What's that?

17:18🔗 Drew That just wasn't an ashtray or what?

17:19🔗 Adam Yeah, yeah. I know it's simple thinking, but that's the way my people are.

17:23🔗 Drew You gotta do something with it.

17:24🔗 Caller When I was young, I thought scars looked cool.

17:26🔗 Adam Yeah.

17:27🔗 Caller So I used to just like do stuff like that because I thought it looked cool.

17:32🔗 Caller Oh, I got another question.

17:34🔗 Adam Hey, Adam.

17:34🔗 Caller Yeah.

17:35🔗 Adam Yeah, we don't got enough time, but look, OK, real quick. No. Yeah.

17:39🔗 Drew Yeah.

17:39🔗 Adam No.

17:41🔗 Drew Come on. Quick. Drew, do we just spend five minutes on every mother, I've had some tough calls so far in that guy.

17:47🔗 Caller I just want to know if maybe sometime I could like come on air and help you guys out for like five or ten minutes sometime.

17:53🔗 Adam Okay. Go ahead, genius.

17:54🔗 Drew Okay.

17:55🔗 Adam No.

17:56🔗 Caller No.

17:57🔗 Adam No. You're kidding.

17:59🔗 Drew Adam, take care of your life.

18:00🔗 Caller I'm still on injury.

18:01🔗 Drew We got a lot of stuff you're dealing with here.

18:03🔗 Adam All right. Look, don't get your girlfriend pregnant. Do whatever you want. Don't get anyone pregnant.

18:09🔗 Caller Oh, I made a promise to myself.

18:10🔗 Drew Don't get addicted.

18:11🔗 Caller My grandfather before you.

18:12🔗 Drew Don't get addicted to anything either. You're going to have a tendency to go towards stuff. Just the way you're going to is the cutting and the burning and all that.

18:17🔗 Adam That's right. If you can.

18:18🔗 Static X Just stick to the cutting and the burning.

18:20🔗 Adam That's right. Focus on the cutting and you're burning. If this kid can not get on to something, booze, heroin, whatever, and not get anyone pregnant in the next three to five years, it'll be, I will consider that a coup.

18:35🔗 Triumph.

18:36🔗 Adam Triumph. That's right. Absolutely. Luke?

18:39🔗 Yeah.

18:39🔗 Adam You're 17.

18:40🔗 Caller That is correct.

18:41🔗 Adam You're on with Static X. You're a virgin, right?

18:44🔗 Um, yeah.

18:45🔗 Adam Yeah. Always hear that voice. I know that virgin voice.

18:49🔗 Caller Yeah, I know. I've heard that before.

18:51🔗 Adam Yeah, I'm hearing it now.

18:52🔗 Caller Yeah. Well, my question is, what exactly is the base system in regards to sex, like baseball? Right. I've heard many different points on it, and this, I want to get a confirmation.

19:02🔗 Drew I think it's changing.

19:05🔗 Adam I think we may have to...

19:06🔗 Drew It's changed from when we were baseball playing age.

19:09🔗 Adam Oh, yeah. Yeah, there's now two bases between first and second. Yeah, I know. You'd have to add, we have to add more bases on the diamond. Have to make it an octagon. It's no longer a diamond.

19:19🔗 Drew I don't think baseball applies to anything.

19:21🔗 Adam Well, let's see if we can agree on this. First base is kissing with the tongue, like making out. Yeah.

19:28🔗 Caller Maybe a little touchy-feely stuff too.

19:30🔗 Drew See, you're coming up. First base...

19:32🔗 Adam No, no, no. First base. If you just got to first base, you can't be doing more than kissing.

19:37🔗 Caller Over the clothes, though.

19:38🔗 Caller Yeah.

19:38🔗 Adam Over the clothes?

19:39🔗 Caller Touching over the clothes.

19:41🔗 Caller And that's all involved in first base?

19:43🔗 Caller Tony?

19:45🔗 Static X I'd buy that.

19:46🔗 Caller Tony's a virgin. He doesn't know.

19:48🔗 Adam But he knows me.

19:49🔗 Caller Yeah, that's me.

19:51🔗 Static X I'm a virgin. So, all right.

19:53🔗 Adam All right. Here's a deal. Kissing with the tongue and maybe a little hand rubbing around, but nothing specific.

20:02🔗 Caller Yeah.

20:03🔗 Adam No nipple flicking.

20:04🔗 Caller Yeah.

20:05🔗 Adam Okay. Now, second base, that's boobs. That's up the shirt.

20:10🔗 Caller Oh, really? Hold on.

20:11🔗 Adam Do you go down the shirt or up the pants? No, down the pants, up the shirt.

20:14🔗 Caller It's up the shirt down the pants.

20:15🔗 Drew I asked a group of kids, I was in a large group of adolescent kids down in Houston, I asked them to put these things on the base for me, and they put oral sex on second base.

20:24🔗 Adam No, they did not.

20:25🔗 Drew Yes, they did.

20:25🔗 Adam Now, Drew, you love to do that. One guy said it. They did.

20:28🔗 Drew No, no.

20:29🔗 Adam Drew, thank God I know you well enough not to listen to you anymore.

20:32🔗 Drew The room consensus.

20:33🔗 Static X So let me guess, the second base was oral, third was vaginal, and then home run was anal.

20:40🔗 Adam No, no.

20:40🔗 Drew Anal was also off the diamond. It didn't count.

20:42🔗 Adam That's dug out. That's why they call it the dug out. You should see me throw a tantrum in the dug out, throwing the bats around, tossing the Gatorade cooler. It's out of control. All right, wait a minute. Luke, don't listen to Drew.

20:58🔗 Drew So second base is closed off.

20:59🔗 Adam Second base is a boob. Well, listen, you got to combine a few activities on some of these bases. Second base is mainly about the boob. Feeling, maybe a little nibbling and all that kind of stuff.

21:13🔗 Drew I think you're way behind on that one.

21:15🔗 Adam Well, look, listen, home run has to be intercourse. It has to be. Because symbolically, it needs to be that.

21:23🔗 Caller The only one that's actually... Go back from there.

21:25🔗 Adam Right, I'm going back from there. So third base has to be oral. Okay. Okay. And second base has to be feeling... It could be underneath. Could be, yes, could be downstairs. Well, I never thought of second base as hand in the panties kind of thing. It wasn't what we were thinking. Okay, so maybe it did that. And then all the weird stuff, you know, the dirty Sanchez and stuff like that. That's all off the diamond. That's right. All right. So, Luke, in review, first base making out with some hand wandering outside of the clothes. Second base hands wandering everywhere.

22:03🔗 Caller Okay.

22:04🔗 Adam On bare skin. Third base, you got the oral sacks.

22:08🔗 Caller Got it.

22:08🔗 Adam And home run, of course, is the actual intercourse.

22:12🔗 Caller All right. But what about the third party stuff?

22:15🔗 Adam Like, like, I mean, like when you got to go to the bullpen?

22:21🔗 Caller Yeah, that kind of.

22:22🔗 Adam That's still, it's all whenever, whatever, whenever you get past home plate, you're just past it. Everything past that.

22:29🔗 Drew You're in a new game. It's a different game.

22:31🔗 Static X Right.

22:31🔗 Drew No longer baseball.

22:32🔗 Static X Right.

22:32🔗 Adam Absolutely.

22:33🔗 Static X It's football.

22:34🔗 Drew It's cricket.

22:35🔗 Static X It's a game of yards from there.

22:37🔗 Adam Sonia?

22:38🔗 Yeah, hi.

22:39🔗 Adam Hey, you're 22. You're on Static X.

22:42🔗 Caller I am?

22:42🔗 Adam Yeah.

22:43🔗 Drew What's up?

22:44🔗 Caller Yeah, it's hard to believe. I'm on my cell phone. I'm like in my car. Anyway, I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism about like four years ago. And I never really did anything about it. I was on Tapasol for a while and I went off it. And I saw my recent endocrinologist and she put me in the hospital and I was treated for that. And so now I'm like in the middle, like I'm not on Synthroid yet.

23:12🔗 Drew Have you had, have you had ablation yet?

23:15🔗 Caller I'm sorry?

23:15🔗 Drew Have you had the ablation yet?

23:17🔗 Adam What's the ablation?

23:17🔗 Drew The radioactive iodine.

23:19🔗 Caller Yeah, that's why I was in the hospital.

23:20🔗 Drew So you had that and now you're on the way down.

23:23🔗 Caller Now I'm on the way down and I'm starting to gain weight. So I'm like working out a lot and I'm really watching what I'm eating. So I weighed myself like the other day and I weighed like seven pounds over what my normal weight was.

23:36🔗 Adam Yeah, you gain weight with the thyroid condition.

23:39🔗 Drew Well, you really don't. No, you don't.

23:41🔗 Adam You don't?

23:42🔗 Caller I don't.

23:43🔗 Drew You can lose, listen, you can lose weight when you're hyperthyroid. Yeah. And so you may be gaining back what you had abnormally lost. But being hyper...

23:54🔗 Caller I've always been like overweight.

23:56🔗 Drew But being... Right. That's right. You're going back to normal.

23:59🔗 Adam I'm interested in this.

24:00🔗 Drew Hypothyroid, although people have this conception, this concept that it causes weight gain, it causes fluid retention more than weight gain. There can be a slight weight increase. And the medicines that they use to treat the hyperthyroidism can cause her to gain weight. So I was going to find out what she was taking.

24:15🔗 Static X All right.

24:15🔗 Adam Well, hold on a second. Hyper and hypo, what's the difference?

24:19🔗 Drew Hyper is high, hypo is low.

24:21🔗 Static X Right.

24:21🔗 Drew Upper.

24:22🔗 Adam Right. Hyper high, hypo low. And then what's the other one that always drives me insane? One means globally and the other means locally. They're the same word, essentially. Do you know what I'm talking about?

24:36🔗 Drew No, globally.

24:37🔗 Adam Yeah, one means everywhere and one means pinpoint. It's another medical term, but it's used all over the place. We've had this discussion before.

24:47🔗 Drew It's driving me crazy now.

24:48🔗 Adam Really?

24:49🔗 Drew Yeah, me.

24:50🔗 Adam Yeah, no, I'm telling you, I'm going to come up with it in a second, and it drives me nuts when there's certain words like, to me, push and pull. It shouldn't start with the same two letters. You know what I'm saying? I mean, how many times you hit that restaurant door and smacked into it because you didn't bother reading the last two letters and everyone turned and looked because the aluminum frame of the thing whacked against the jam? I'd like one to say yank and the other to say push. Do you know what I mean? I don't want the same two letters. They're too close. I don't like when words sound almost alike but mean totally different things.

25:24🔗 Drew Push, pull, and press.

25:25🔗 Adam Hypo and hyper.

25:27🔗 Drew Hyper and hypo.

25:28🔗 Adam Yeah, I don't like that.

25:29🔗 Drew Local and global. You're driving me insane now. Yeah.

25:31🔗 Adam Well, think about it. You're a smart guy. I gave you the clue. It's there. One means everything. The other means nothing. One means almost nothing. The other means everything everywhere.

25:45🔗 Drew Let me think about it.

25:45🔗 Caller Questions best left to theologists.

25:47🔗 Drew Dictionary, anyone? Endo or like, wait a minute.

25:50🔗 Adam No. You're getting close. I think it is something like that. No. Okay.

25:54🔗 Drew What are we talking about?

25:55🔗 Adam I don't know.

25:56🔗 Drew Exocrine and endocrine or something? No.

25:58🔗 Adam You know what? Don't think too much. Just think a little bit. You're thinking too much. Should we take a break?

26:03🔗 Drew Yes, please.

26:03🔗 Adam Do we answer a question?

26:04🔗 Drew No.

26:04🔗 Adam Just take a break. Let's just answer it off the air.

26:06🔗 Drew Not one. Okay.

26:08🔗 Adam Not one. Static X is here. We're all going to think about that last 20 minutes and then we'll get back.

26:16🔗 Caller Hello? Is this Loveline?

26:17🔗 Caller Call 1-800-LOVE-199. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.

26:24🔗 Adam Hey, everybody. I'm Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Drew over there. Tony and Wayne are both here from Static X. New CD, Machines, is out as we speak. And we should hear something off of that. We didn't work that out, did we?

26:42🔗 Drew Yeah, this break. This break.

26:44🔗 Adam Oh, okay.

26:44🔗 Drew It is right here, black and white.

26:45🔗 Adam Oh, where's the CD? I need the CD. I gotta look at the CD. All right, we'll work this out.

26:51🔗 Drew Maybe we should play a song.

26:52🔗 Adam No, no, no.

26:52🔗 Drew I don't have one. You're going down that path.

26:53🔗 Adam We'll work it out. Work it out.

26:55🔗 Static X We'll have somebody get one.

26:56🔗 Adam The word that was driving me nuts and then Drew nuts is micro and macro. Those were the two things. Micro means a small, macro means a huge. Now, too close to me to mean two opposite things. That's all I'm saying. Lauren? Hi. Like micro and giganto or something like that. That I'll go with. Go ahead, Lauren. You're 15. Hi. Hey.

27:22🔗 Caller I love you guys.

27:24🔗 Adam Who do you love? Static X?

27:26🔗 Caller Adam and Drew.

27:27🔗 Oh.

27:27🔗 Adam Well, we love Static X. Nobody loves us.

27:31🔗 Caller I love you, too. Okay.

27:32🔗 What's your question?

27:34🔗 Caller Well, I really like my boyfriend and we've been going out for a while and we go to this point where we're going to almost have sex. And then I get like these flashbacks of like being molested and he gets freaked out. He thinks that I don't like him or something. He doesn't know. I don't want to. I don't want to tell him that.

27:52🔗 Drew Well, how do you act in those flashbacks?

27:54🔗 Caller I just said that I don't know. I don't want to.

27:57🔗 Drew But you don't freak out, start sobbing or get angry or anything.

27:59🔗 Caller I'm going to kill you today.

28:01🔗 Caller I started shaking the other day and he didn't know what was wrong.

28:04🔗 Drew Is he is he kind to you when you get like this? All right. Well, that's nice.

28:07🔗 Caller But he just he just thinks it's him.

28:09🔗 Drew I think you ought to tell him. I think you ought to tell him.

28:11🔗 Adam I don't know.

28:12🔗 Static X Look, how long have you been with him?

28:14🔗 Drew I don't think it will freak him out.

28:15🔗 Adam I do. How long?

28:17🔗 Caller A couple of months.

28:18🔗 Adam Okay. And how old is he?

28:20🔗 Caller He's 17.

28:21🔗 Drew Are you getting a treatment for this?

28:24🔗 Caller I'm in therapy and I'm on serozone. Okay. It's not really working.

28:28🔗 Drew Well, have you told your therapist about these flashbacks?

28:30🔗 Caller No.

28:32🔗 Drew You haven't told the therapist about what happened to you?

28:34🔗 Caller We don't really talk about that.

28:35🔗 Drew Lauren, you got to bring that out, okay? It's important.

28:39🔗 Adam He doesn't know about the molestation?

28:41🔗 Caller Who?

28:42🔗 Drew She, the therapist.

28:43🔗 Adam She, the therapist?

28:44🔗 Caller Yeah, he does, but we just, I don't know, we don't talk about that.

28:49🔗 Caller All right.

28:50🔗 Adam Well, that should be the new topic.

28:52🔗 Drew Yeah, that's what you go in there with this week.

28:54🔗 Caller And like every time that happens, I think about cutting myself again and I don't want to end up back in...

28:58🔗 Drew This is something I was talking about 10 minutes ago, which is this post-traumatic stress reaction. When these things overwhelm you, your brain does whatever it can to manage them and it uses arousal. Now, the last caller thought I meant sexual arousal. I mean any kind of arousal. Cutting, extreme activities, rage, all those things will distract you from the... Or using drugs will distract you from the flashbacks. And you need to learn how to manage those affect states, those feelings.

29:23🔗 Adam Who molested you?

29:24🔗 Caller My sister's father.

29:26🔗 Adam Your sister's father? Is that your...

29:28🔗 Caller My sister's father.

29:29🔗 Drew Your stepfather.

29:30🔗 Caller No, he was my mother's boyfriend.

29:32🔗 Caller Oh, okay.

29:34🔗 Adam Your mom sounds like a dynamite lady.

29:35🔗 Caller Oh, she really is.

29:37🔗 Adam Yeah, I'd really like to have a nice sit down with her.

29:39🔗 Caller And then I have my alcohol-like coquette father.

29:42🔗 Adam Right. All right.

29:43🔗 Drew Good time.

29:43🔗 Adam So plenty of reason. Plenty of stuff to talk to the shrink about. Right? All right. So get into that stuff. I would discuss it with the shrink about whether to discuss it with the boy or not. All right. All right.

29:55🔗 Drew Fair enough.

29:56🔗 Adam All right? Okay. Get into that. Because I know everyone's into that truth will set you free stuff.

30:01🔗 But I don't know.

30:02🔗 Adam Seventeen-year-old Duke could get pretty freaked out over this kind of thing.

30:05🔗 Drew I think the guy's ego is so delicate until he figures out, really understands it's not about him. He's going to be freaking out.

30:12🔗 Adam No.

30:12🔗 Drew And when she tells him it's sexual abuse, he's not going to understand what that means. He's going to go, oh, good. At least not me.

30:17🔗 Adam No.

30:17🔗 Drew That's going to be his tag.

30:18🔗 Adam I was not going to say good.

30:19🔗 Drew Oh, a seven-year-old male?

30:21🔗 Static X He's going to be thinking, oh, great. That means I'm not going to get any.

30:24🔗 Adam He's going to be freaked.

30:25🔗 Drew Maybe.

30:25🔗 Adam He's going to be freaked out. I think he would. I think right now he just thinks she's overwhelmed with his sexual prowess, like she's swooning in front of Elvis or something. It's so good. You know what I'm saying? I wouldn't say anything.

30:39🔗 Drew Good times.

30:40🔗 Adam Good times. Joe? Yes. You're 17. Yes, I am.

30:44🔗 Caller What's up?

30:46🔗 Caller My girl and I were planning on having sex during her period. And I was wondering what the chances were of her actually getting pregnant.

30:54🔗 Drew What do you mean the chances? You mean maybe a number of the?

30:57🔗 Static X What do you want? Vegas odds?

30:59🔗 Caller I mean, would it be almost the same if she wasn't?

31:02🔗 Drew No, it's not the same as when most women ovulate, but you can't tell when she's ovulating. So we can't tell you what the odds are.

31:08🔗 Caller Well, what if she's right on her period?

31:10🔗 Adam Oh, man.

31:10🔗 Drew She can still get pregnant.

31:12🔗 Adam I'm just picturing.

31:13🔗 Static X Remember, they have two ovaries.

31:15🔗 Drew It's not likely, but it's possible.

31:17🔗 Adam I'm just picturing that Thousand Island that's going to come out of her after he's done.

31:22🔗 Static X There's no reason to get ketchup on your hot dog. That's all I'm saying.

31:25🔗 Drew Make sure, if you do this and you do not use a condom, you get...

31:28🔗 Adam Oh, when that mayonnaise hits the ketchup, boy.

31:32🔗 Drew You get that morning after pill, okay?

31:35🔗 Caller And I get that through the Planned Family, right?

31:37🔗 Drew Planned Parenthood, any doctor, you just take it with... The sooner you take it after intercourse, the more effective it is. Again, the idea is, is a three-day window, you can suppress the egg from being released and the sperm don't get to get to it.

31:47🔗 Caller Just to be safe, use a condom while going in there.

31:50🔗 Drew Yeah.

31:51🔗 Caller Okay.

31:52🔗 Drew Yeah, on multiple levels be safe, right?

31:54🔗 Caller Okay.

31:55🔗 Adam All right. Hey, Joe, you're pretty hardcore for 17. I mean, are you glad she's on her period or do you kind of like it?

32:04🔗 Drew No, I think the deal is...

32:05🔗 Static X You're just so horny, you don't care.

32:06🔗 Drew I think the window of opportunity has opened and she happened to be on her period.

32:10🔗 Caller Yeah, well, it's bad timing, but it'll work.

32:14🔗 Adam Have you been having sex with her?

32:15🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, we have.

32:17🔗 Adam You have?

32:18🔗 Static X All right.

32:18🔗 Adam You're ready to keep pushing on.

32:19🔗 Static X All right.

32:20🔗 Adam Are you going to go down on her?

32:21🔗 Uh, don't think so.

32:23🔗 Static X Earn your red wings, buddy.

32:25🔗 Adam All right.

32:26🔗 Static X All right.

32:26🔗 Caller You guys are really awesome, man. I listen to you guys all the time.

32:29🔗 Adam Good times there, Joe.

32:30🔗 Caller Thanks.

32:31🔗 Adam All right. And then put some visqueen down, some plastic or something, though, all right?

32:35🔗 Caller All right.

32:35🔗 Adam Let me see. You don't want to mess things up.

32:37🔗 Drew Visqueen?

32:38🔗 Adam Visqueen.

32:39🔗 Drew It's like a drop cloth.

32:40🔗 Adam Rolled plastic. Yeah. Construction, you know, from old construction days.

32:45🔗 Drew I'm sure a 17-year-old knows what visqueen is. Oh, excuse me.

32:49🔗 Adam Visqueen, yes.

32:50🔗 Drew Mrs. Beasley?

32:51🔗 Adam Yeah. Should I use a micro or macro amount of the visqueen, of said visqueen? Erica?

32:57🔗 Caller Hi.

32:58🔗 Adam Hey, you're 19. You're on Static X.

33:00🔗 Caller Yeah. First of all, I just want to say, Adam, I am not obsessed with you and I do not write your name on my shoes.

33:07🔗 Adam All right.

33:08🔗 Drew Careful, careful. Oh, I was afraid of that.

33:10🔗 Adam We got to move on. We really do. Wait a minute. Did she have a question for Static X?

33:15🔗 Drew Yeah, but so does this one.

33:16🔗 Adam All right. Now, let her talk to Static X. Erica?

33:19🔗 Caller Yeah.

33:20🔗 Adam Okay. Talk to Static X.

33:21🔗 Caller I still love you.

33:22🔗 Adam That's fine.

33:23🔗 Drew Oh my God.

33:25🔗 Caller Hold on a second.

33:26🔗 Drew This is awful.

33:28🔗 Adam I wish in life that I had a drop button, just a big button I could carry around and because it gets everyone in line immediately. Like you'd be talking to your girlfriend and you'd be going, so what movie you want to see? And she'd be like, I want to see the Ivoran merch. And you'd be going like your finger would start going towards you and you'd go, no, no, okay, no, Death Race 3000. That's fine. That's fine. That's fine. So it snaps everyone back.

33:52🔗 Drew Basically, Adam wants to be the queen of hearts.

33:53🔗 Adam Yeah. Right.

33:54🔗 Static X The trap door button.

33:55🔗 Drew Off with his head.

33:56🔗 Adam Right. And you know, it's great too, is you put them on, you hit that drop button and you let them simmer for about five, ten seconds. Then you get back to them. Totally new attitude. It'd be great.

34:06🔗 Drew Like, you'd be like, Why don't you just become a dog trainer, an animal trainer? It'd be so gratifying for you.

34:10🔗 Adam It'd be great. You go like a body shop, you get an estimate. The guy would be like, that's 1800, but you'd see the finger above the thousand, 400, for free. It'd be great. Drew, give me one of those. Rig me up one of those drop buttons for life, would you?

34:24🔗 Drew Erica, go ahead.

34:25🔗 Caller Okay. I was just wondering, Static X, are you guys going on tour soon or?

34:31🔗 Adam Yeah. They got some dates coming up.

34:33🔗 Caller Where do you live?

34:34🔗 Caller Santa Barbara.

34:36🔗 Caller Yeah. We're going to be around this area.

34:38🔗 Caller Oh, really?

34:39🔗 Adam Can you get from Santa Barbara to LA?

34:42🔗 Caller Yeah. All right.

34:44🔗 Adam Also, we're also going to be in San Francisco on the 30th of this month. No. What are we in?

34:51🔗 Drew It's August.

34:52🔗 Static X We're in August.

34:56🔗 Adam Yeah. August 30th. We're going to be at the Fillmore in San Francisco. You want to drive up there? Yeah.

35:02🔗 Caller We'll be in LA on September 1st.

35:04🔗 Okay. Cool.

35:05🔗 Adam All right.

35:06🔗 Caller See you there.

35:07🔗 Adam Good times.

35:08🔗 Caller Bye. All right. Let's talk to...

35:12🔗 Adam Do you want to hear a song from Static X?

35:14🔗 Caller All right.

35:15🔗 Adam This is off of the new CD Machines, and this one is called Black and White. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Drew over there. Tony Weiner, both here from Static X. Machines is the name of the CD. Shipped gold, thank you. And we'll hear something else off of that CD in the 11 o'clock hour. Now it's time to get back to the phones and speak to Anna. Anna?

39:32🔗 Caller Hello?

39:33🔗 Caller What's up?

39:35🔗 Caller Oh, hi. My question, or not a question, actually, I was going to tell Dr. Drew that when I went into the clinic, the county clinic here in Sacramento, they said that I couldn't have the morning after pill because I didn't need it since I'd been on my period.

39:53🔗 Drew Since you had had your period or since you had sex while on your period?

39:57🔗 Caller No, I'd had sex while on my period and I went in asking for the morning after pill and they said that I didn't need it and they wouldn't give it to me.

40:06🔗 Drew That's a call that some doctors might make. I wouldn't be willing to do that.

40:10🔗 Caller Yeah, well, I mean, I'm just telling you that that's, I mean, that's what happens.

40:14🔗 Caller It's not always the case.

40:16🔗 Drew It's interesting. I'm glad you called. I would still encourage someone to take it. I think it's a protection and it's a protection worth taking and I don't think that having had or being on your period necessarily makes it safe for you, so.

40:28🔗 Adam What is the risk to taking the morning after pill? I don't mean, I don't mean, you know what I mean?

40:35🔗 Drew Yeah, it's a great question.

40:35🔗 Adam You gotta weigh them against each other.

40:37🔗 Drew Right, it's been used worldwide from over a couple of, for what, a decade and a half and it's been, it's one of the only medications you can point at that's had zero side effects. It's been a zero negative outcome from that drug.

40:51🔗 Adam Really?

40:51🔗 Drew Which is amazing. Now, on the other hand, we just got a fax here, an email, rather, that I thought was interesting. This is interesting, it sort of highlights how different men and women are, because I never would have thought of this.

41:01🔗 Adam I'll tell you the interesting part, it's not going to be interesting.

41:03🔗 Drew Because you think it's interesting. I know, that's the fascinating part.

41:05🔗 Adam I already know it's not going to be interesting.

41:07🔗 Drew All right, she took the morning of the pill at the end of April, was wondering if you take the morning of the pill, does it mess up your whole cycle the rest of the year, because my cycle, my period used to come in the middle of the month, now it becomes the beginning. She's freaked out that it moved her period in the month at a different time.

41:18🔗 Adam Right.

41:19🔗 Drew And you wonder if that, you know, bothers women.

41:22🔗 Adam I don't wonder, though.

41:23🔗 Drew I know.

41:23🔗 Adam You wonder. One wonders.

41:24🔗 Drew One wonders.

41:25🔗 Adam Not this one.

41:25🔗 Drew But you're right. It's not very interesting.

41:27🔗 Caller Okay. No. Okay.

41:29🔗 Adam But it's informative. And we try to be at least that on this show. Lance?

41:34🔗 Drew You really just didn't hear a word I said.

41:35🔗 Adam Huh?

41:36🔗 Drew That's right.

41:37🔗 Adam Lance, you're 25.

41:38🔗 Caller Hey, what's going on, guys?

41:39🔗 Adam Hey.

41:40🔗 Caller Hey, Tony. Hey, Wayne.

41:41🔗 Adam Hey.

41:42🔗 Caller Hey, Adam. First of all, I wanted to tell you, man, I'm probably your biggest, like, gay fan here in Dallas, man. I think you're awesome.

41:47🔗 Adam Thank you. As you know, I love the gays.

41:50🔗 Caller You do.

41:50🔗 Adam I know. I like to be the unofficial king of the gays. If you guys, do you have a king? Is there an old king?

42:00🔗 Caller There are a lot of queens.

42:01🔗 Adam Queen of the gays?

42:02🔗 Caller Very few kings.

42:03🔗 Drew That's the point. You want to be the one king.

42:05🔗 Adam I would like to be the king of the gays.

42:07🔗 Caller All right. Cool.

42:07🔗 Adam Thank you.

42:10🔗 Caller I guess I should probably start out by giving you a little background information, which will help out a little bit. I'm a recovering addict, recovering alcoholic and recovering sex addict, which will probably explain some of my behavior.

42:20🔗 Drew Very interesting. Yes, yes. We're recovering in what sense? Tell me what you've done.

42:25🔗 Caller In what sense?

42:26🔗 Drew Sexually? Like, are you going to SA? Do you have an SA sponsor?

42:30🔗 Caller Yeah, SAA and AA.

42:31🔗 Drew And you have a sponsor in each of those areas?

42:33🔗 Caller I have a sponsor in AA and working on getting a sponsor in SAA.

42:37🔗 Drew Okay. How long have you been sober from drugs?

42:39🔗 Caller I've been sober now for three months on the 28th.

42:42🔗 Drew What drug?

42:43🔗 Caller From alcohol and drugs. I actually haven't drank for like two years, but I had a slip on Ambien.

42:49🔗 Drew So Ambien has been the latest drug?

42:51🔗 Adam Yeah. I had a slip on Ambien a couple of nights ago. It's just I took three of them and I slipped in the tub. I love that Ambien. And so you don't slip again. Why don't you give me whatever Ambien you have?

43:04🔗 Caller I'll do that to you.

43:05🔗 Adam It's a great sleeping medication.

43:06🔗 Drew Lance, what's your drug of choice overall?

43:09🔗 Caller It's probably alcohol. Second was cocaine.

43:11🔗 Drew All right. Got it. So you're only three months sober here, really? What's your longest period of sobriety?

43:16🔗 Caller I was sober for a year and a half.

43:18🔗 Drew When was that?

43:19🔗 Caller That was six months ago. All right. Got it.

43:22🔗 Drew All right. Got it.

43:23🔗 Adam All right. So the question is...

43:25🔗 Caller The question is, I'm having a problem with my ex. It's like a mixture of jealousy and attachment. I'm jealous of the kind of the progress he's made since we've broken up and his kind of capacity to make friends and stuff. And I have a really hard time doing that. I have friends and stuff in my program, but my sponsor just kind of came down on me really hard. She's a real ball buster.

43:49🔗 Caller She?

43:50🔗 Caller She told me that.

43:51🔗 She?

43:52🔗 Caller No, my sponsor's a she.

43:54🔗 Drew I'm not sure that's right. I understand why you're doing that.

43:56🔗 Caller Yeah.

43:57🔗 Drew But is that... Are you going to a gay recovery group?

43:59🔗 Caller Yeah.

44:00🔗 Drew And they're recommending you get a female sponsor?

44:03🔗 Caller For me, yeah, because there's no risk of me, you know, wanting to sleep with her or anything like that.

44:07🔗 Drew You know what? I understand why you're doing that. And it sort of may be an OK stopgap measure, but the role of the sponsor is really somebody to reflect back to you.

44:21🔗 Adam Well, what's wrong with having a different gender?

44:23🔗 Drew It's not enough of an identification. It's OK. And I understand why you're doing it, because you're a sex addict and whatnot, but you really need to be able to be fully reflected in that other person.

44:33🔗 Adam Well, is she a lesbian? Yeah. Well, you're halfway home.

44:37🔗 Drew Just keep that in mind.

44:38🔗 Adam But then you're part chick, so it's confusing now.

44:41🔗 Drew I absolutely do not.

44:42🔗 Adam It cancels out. You're right.

44:43🔗 Drew I really don't let people have sponsors that are opposite sex if they're heterosexual for the same reasons you don't want to have one. But there's a quality to it that you really need the same sex identifying with you. All right.

44:57🔗 Adam Well, that's not good.

45:00🔗 Caller I'm finding male sponsors and gay sponsors that recognize sex addiction.

45:05🔗 Drew Yes. That's out. Yes, I understand.

45:07🔗 Adam Let's get back to the question, though. This is your ex-boyfriend.

45:11🔗 Drew You would have to have that. You understand, Lance?

45:13🔗 Caller Right.

45:14🔗 Drew Okay. Go ahead.

45:16🔗 Caller Well, the problem is that I can't like... We're still friends and stuff. We still live in the same apartment complex and stuff. He moved out and moved into a different apartment here in the same complex. So we see each other regularly.

45:25🔗 Drew That's not good.

45:26🔗 Caller But...

45:26🔗 Drew You just need distance. That's all. You need to be away from him.

45:29🔗 Caller It's like I don't feel like we've had enough of that.

45:31🔗 Static X Cut the ties, dude.

45:32🔗 Drew Yeah. Six months.

45:33🔗 Caller Cold turkey. Yeah.

45:35🔗 Adam Yeah. You got to do that. You cannot monitor the progress of your ex, a boy or a girl. It's always painful.

45:42🔗 Static X Yeah. You know what? Being friends is overrated.

45:45🔗 Adam Oh, absolutely.

45:45🔗 Drew Oh, oh, oh. Well, yeah. Highly overrated. It's not possible.

45:48🔗 Static X Yeah.

45:49🔗 Drew It's possible, but the first six months, it makes it very, very, very painful.

45:52🔗 Static X Yeah. Absolutely.

45:53🔗 Adam Yeah. Obviously, you have feelings and this person tries to start a life on their own. They start dating and then there's trouble. You can't do it.

46:01🔗 Drew I think somewhere in here is an intent to reconnect with him.

46:05🔗 Adam Yeah. You think so?

46:06🔗 Drew With the old boyfriend? Oh, yeah.

46:07🔗 Adam I guess. Any time one of them wants to remain friends.

46:11🔗 Drew Especially when someone wants to monitor them.

46:13🔗 Adam Lance? Lance?

46:15🔗 Caller Yeah.

46:16🔗 Adam Do you want to get back together with this guy?

46:20🔗 Caller No, not at all. It was like the best thing that could have possibly happened in my recovery was us breaking up.

46:26🔗 Adam But no feelings, huh?

46:27🔗 Caller Yeah. I mean, there's still some feelings there. I can't deny that.

46:32🔗 Adam Is Lance, is that your real name or your gay name?

46:34🔗 Caller No, that's my real name.

46:35🔗 Adam Oh, okay. Do they sign gay names like Jewish names?

46:39🔗 Caller On occasion.

46:40🔗 Adam Yeah. Because I think Lance is one of the ones they sign.

46:43🔗 Caller All right.

46:44🔗 Adam All right, Lance.

46:44🔗 Caller Good times.

46:45🔗 Adam Good luck. All right, man. You sound like you're doing all right. You're doing great work. Cool, thanks. All right. All right. Let's talk to Jen, who's 26. Jen?

46:53🔗 Caller Hi. Actually, it's Jen with an S.

46:55🔗 Drew Jen's.

46:55🔗 Caller But, oh man, I've been a long time with you guys. And Adam, you're the best. And Dr. Drew, I think you do a great service for the communities. But my girlfriend's on Paxil, and I'm thinking that we're probably going to get married maybe in a year or so. And I'm just wondering, like, what type of effect that might have when we want to have kids? Like, does it have any effect on children or anything like that?

47:19🔗 Drew The fact that she has depression or the fact that she's on Paxil?

47:22🔗 Caller The fact that she's on Paxil and also depression. She just revealed to me, at first she told me she was just depressed, but then she revealed to me that she's, like, somewhat bipolar also.

47:32🔗 Drew All right, hold on.

47:32🔗 Adam All right. Hang on there, Gens. And what's your girlfriend's name? Lisa's? No, Yvonne. Okay. Yvonne's? All right, hold on. We got to take a little break. Static X is here. We'll talk about Paxil Depression and bipolarism and pregnancy and whatnot after this. Thank you. It's Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LLVE-191. Tony and Wayne are both here from Static X. Machines is the name of the CD. We'll hear something else off of that.

48:14🔗 Caller It's Machine.

48:15🔗 Adam Oh, did I say Machines?

48:17🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:17🔗 Adam Oh, let's see what they wrote on my paper there.

48:20🔗 Caller Oh, it's not your fault.

48:22🔗 Adam Yeah, they wrote Machines there.

48:24🔗 Static X We're going to have to kick somebody's ass.

48:25🔗 Adam Sorry, I'm going to scratch that out there.

48:28🔗 Caller I won't hold against you.

48:29🔗 Adam Thank you. Static X. We'll hear some more off of that in the 11 o'clock hour. I can also tell you that they'll be on the Family Value or Values Tour.

48:43🔗 Static X See, they correctly added the S to them.

48:45🔗 Adam Coming up and you can also find them alone or I don't know. Are you playing with somebody on these dates I have in front of me?

48:52🔗 Caller It's headline dates and we have a couple bands, Friends of Ours, Apex Theory and Deadsy are also going to be on the bill. We're headlining these shows coming up.

48:59🔗 Adam Right. Fillmore, House of Blues in Las Vegas, Palace out in Hollywood, Anaheim at the House of Blues out there and the Cajun House in Scottsdale, Arizona and Sunshine Theater, Albuquerque, New Mexico and Deep, is that day Elam?

49:16🔗 Static X Deep Elam.

49:17🔗 Adam Elam. And what the hell is Deep Elam?

49:20🔗 Static X I have no idea.

49:20🔗 Drew It's a city.

49:21🔗 Adam All right.

49:22🔗 Drew What state? It's a venue. I see.

49:25🔗 Adam They sing Highway Star. That's in Dallas and these are all coming up in the next month or so for Static X. All right. Now where were we, Drew? Can you get back to the phones?

49:36🔗 Drew Jen's.

49:37🔗 Adam Yeah. I wanted to also mention that next week System of a Down is going to be in here. Henry Rollins, Jerry Manthe from Survivor and Playboy and Long Beach Dub All-Stars. So a bunch of our old friends coming in next week. Jen. Jen's.

49:54🔗 Drew Everybody is a repeat visitor next week.

49:56🔗 Adam Yes. Yes. Jen's.

49:58🔗 Caller All right.

49:59🔗 Adam And you're thinking about getting married in a year.

50:02🔗 Caller Yeah.

50:02🔗 Adam Your girlfriend is on Paxil.

50:04🔗 Drew Yeah.

50:04🔗 Adam She has a bipolar.

50:06🔗 Drew How did that come up that she told you she was bipolar?

50:10🔗 Caller Well, she had told me that she was depressed before. And then actually her dad came out to visit recently and she said that he was bipolar. And then I kind of was like, well, what about you? And she said, well, yes, I am also.

50:23🔗 Drew I am or I might be.

50:25🔗 Caller I am.

50:25🔗 Drew Okay. Is she on something besides Paxil?

50:28🔗 Caller Not that I know of.

50:30🔗 Drew Does she get manic at all on you?

50:32🔗 Caller She has like, it's kind of a weird story. We like, we dated in high school and then broke up. And then like about a year later, well, I'm sorry, about 10 years later, actually we got back together and she said, like in the time period before she called me, like she couldn't sleep, like for almost about a month.

50:50🔗 Drew Okay. So she was manic then.

50:51🔗 Caller Yeah.

50:52🔗 Drew Well, you have to be careful with people bipolar that go on antidepressants because sometimes the antidepressants themselves can precipitate a manic episode. And your concern about pregnancy is appropriate. You really shouldn't be on antidepressants during pregnancy. There are none that are completely safe for children. But they may be safe. We actually don't really know the full effect of those. So most doctors will try to avoid that. And she's going to be watched very carefully for instabilities in her mood. Just also during the pregnancy as well as after the pregnancy, she'll be at increased risk of postpartum depression.

51:20🔗 Adam Yeah. What about bipolar mom? I mean, does this get better?

51:24🔗 Drew Yes. Well, what do you mean?

51:26🔗 Adam I mean, it's highly treatable. What I'm saying is she gets on her meds, does a little therapy, gets in a better place, and then can have kids.

51:36🔗 Drew It's a highly treatable disease, but it's characteristically relapsing.

51:41🔗 Static X Okay.

51:42🔗 Drew There will be episodes.

51:43🔗 Static X So I ain't like a cold. It goes away.

51:44🔗 Drew It goes away, but it comes back.

51:45🔗 Static X All right.

51:46🔗 Adam Let's... Jeez, my headphones are for crap. All of a sudden, it went south. Wait a minute. I'm going to try plugging them back in. All right. Let's talk to Aaron, who's 19. Aaron? Yeah. Hey.

51:57🔗 Caller Hey. I'll get to my problem. I just wanted to say, like Wayne and Tony, I'm huge fans, hardcore fan of Static X. I think you guys are just the greatest. Thank you.

52:06🔗 Caller Thank you.

52:08🔗 Adam They're coming to Scottsdale, Arizona.

52:10🔗 Drew He's in Tulsa, though.

52:11🔗 Caller I have a friend who lives in Scottsdale. I think that's the closest you're coming to Oklahoma, so I might actually go.

52:16🔗 Drew What did you read there?

52:18🔗 Static X I read Tulsa.

52:19🔗 Drew Phoenix?

52:20🔗 Adam No, no. Where's?

52:22🔗 Drew Tucson.

52:23🔗 Adam I was thinking Tucson. Yeah.

52:24🔗 Drew Tempe.

52:25🔗 Adam No, I read Tucson. Yeah. I said the Tulsa.

52:27🔗 Caller Tucson is too far south to Scottsdale. But my... Well, I guess it's a problem. Your screener didn't seem to think so, which is kind of cool, but I'm basically addicted to Asian girls.

52:37🔗 Adam Yeah. Who is number one? That's Minka. You like Minka?

52:41🔗 Caller Very nice.

52:42🔗 Adam Do you enjoy Minka?

52:43🔗 Caller I prefer Koreans, but I can live with Minka.

52:47🔗 Adam Minka is Korean.

52:48🔗 Oh, well, then all the better.

52:49🔗 Adam Yeah. Number one Asian big boob queen.

52:51🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

52:52🔗 Drew Korean tennis pro.

52:53🔗 Caller Pictures of her.

52:54🔗 Caller Yeah.

52:55🔗 Caller Like, I mean, it's not... I dated... My first girlfriend was Asian, and it's kind of been the way since that I kind of see come out, and it's gotten kind of to the point now where, like, my best friend is dating an Asian girl, and I've been trying to try to break him up on purpose for, like, the last two months just to kind of hook up with her. I mean, I'll go out of my way, like, okay, I'll be at a club, and a good-looking girl will come up to me, and if there's an Asian girl, like, sitting over there by herself, or just having nothing to do with me, I'll go up and intentionally approach her.

53:25🔗 Static X So some hot blonde with, like, huge cans came up to him.

53:27🔗 Caller Oh, I have no interest in blondes whatsoever.

53:29🔗 Adam Yeah. All right. Do you like Asians?

53:32🔗 Caller Yeah, well, I just, I don't know if, like, that's a fixation.

53:35🔗 Adam Well, all right, probably. But what do you like about them?

53:40🔗 Caller I don't know, you know? It's like, it's not kind of mean, but like the submissiveness or the... Yeah, that's it... .the femininity that comes, you know, through all of skin, man. I don't know.

53:50🔗 Drew Well, what does that submissiveness do for you? What does that make you think of? What does that work for you?

53:55🔗 Caller I don't really, it's just going to sound bad. I don't like, like, I've dated a lot of bitchy girls.

53:59🔗 Caller Right.

54:00🔗 Caller Can I say that?

54:01🔗 Caller Yeah.

54:01🔗 Caller Okay. And it's just kind of like, like, the Asians that I've dated, the girls, and the other girls that I've dated, they're more passive-aggressive about it, you know? I mean, I'm kind of passive-aggressive myself. Like, all the ones, at least in my experience, that you like, if you have an argument or something, they kind of blow it off and let it simmer. And they just, I don't know. Maybe it's some kind of control issue, but.

54:23🔗 Adam All right. What about the vagina?

54:26🔗 Caller I love the brown vagina.

54:27🔗 Adam You like the Asian vagina?

54:28🔗 Caller I do, and the brown nipples. If your nipples are a darker color than your skin, you're good times, good times.

54:34🔗 Adam Right. I got bad news for you. My nipples are darker than my skin is. So.

54:39🔗 Caller Well, there are exceptions to everything.

54:41🔗 Adam We're going to be hooking up when I get out to Tulsa.

54:44🔗 Caller You can come look me up, man.

54:45🔗 Caller All right. All right.

54:47🔗 Adam I like a little nipple play.

54:48🔗 Caller I'm not ashamed to be passive, too.

54:50🔗 Adam Yeah.

54:51🔗 Caller Very submissive. I want to point that out.

54:54🔗 Adam I'll call you Mr. Eddie's father. Little Mrs. Livingston humor there from the courtship of Eddie's father.

55:01🔗 Caller All right.

55:01🔗 Adam And yet you're not a big fan of Minka.

55:04🔗 Caller No. No. See, I don't like the big breasts.

55:08🔗 Drew Also, she's got kind of an aggressive edge to her. You know what I mean?

55:11🔗 Adam Minka?

55:11🔗 Drew Look what she did to you at that strip bar.

55:13🔗 Adam Just because she ruptured my scrotum with her shin does not make her aggressive. She's a lovely, lovely, lovely dynamite Asian lady. I had a lovely talk with at a strip club over some cherry pie by Warren. How much do your boobs weigh?

55:34🔗 Caller Huh?

55:36🔗 Adam It was great.

55:37🔗 Drew That's what you first heard about the tennis history, right?

55:40🔗 Caller Yeah.

55:40🔗 Adam Do you guys know who Minka is?

55:43🔗 Static X I don't have the pleasure.

55:44🔗 Caller I'm not familiar.

55:45🔗 Adam Number one Asian big boob queen. She's an Asian woman with a huge can. Great porn star. She's a delight.

55:53🔗 Static X I have to look her up.

55:54🔗 Adam Yeah. Look her up on the Internet.

55:56🔗 Static X Yeah.

55:56🔗 Adam We had her in here once.

55:58🔗 Static X Minka.

55:59🔗 Adam Yeah. She's really delight.

56:01🔗 Drew But she didn't start as a pornography queen.

56:04🔗 Adam Start as a tennis instructor.

56:06🔗 Caller Don't play tennis no more.

56:08🔗 Adam That's right. When you see the cans on her and then you picture holding anything, especially a racket, anything other than a penis.

56:18🔗 Drew Swinging.

56:18🔗 Adam Swinging a racket. Yes, you will be amazed.

56:22🔗 Caller All right.

56:22🔗 Adam Where are we going here? Did we help Aaron at all?

56:25🔗 Drew Yeah, he's fine.

56:25🔗 Caller He's fine?

56:26🔗 Adam Oh, look, whatever you like. Here's the deal. If you're in Asian women, you're in Asian women. We're not going to be able to talk you out of that. So enjoy. That's basically what we're saying. Have fun. Andrew?

56:38🔗 Caller Yeah.

56:39🔗 Adam You're 19.

56:40🔗 Caller Yeah. First time call, long time listener.

56:42🔗 Adam Great.

56:44🔗 Caller I took Trump like about a week ago.

56:46🔗 Drew What is that?

56:47🔗 Caller It's the hell's bell. It's like a big yellow plant and it looks like a bell. Me and a couple of friends, we made it like into a tea. Right. Like I'm still on it right now. It's been like a week.

57:00🔗 Caller Is that Trumpet you called it?

57:02🔗 Caller I took music lessons.

57:04🔗 Static X Yeah. I'm like, yeah, I took Trumpet when I was in elementary school.

57:07🔗 Drew It's not O'Lean.

57:09🔗 Caller You start creeping out too weird. Like I had this big banner of Chet Webber on top of my bed and the guy start talking to me about the revolution.

57:18🔗 Static X You know what? I did acid when I was 13 and after like the sixth hour, George Washington was talking to me from the dollar bill, dude, so it's all good.

57:27🔗 Caller That guy was telling me things about the revolution that I didn't even know. Where did I even really know?

57:31🔗 Drew Andrew, you're having a reaction here, okay?

57:35🔗 Static X Just mellow out.

57:35🔗 Drew Some of these plant hallucinogens that people use can go on for quite some time. Do you remember where you've been the last few days?

57:43🔗 Caller Yeah. I've been just chilling at home.

57:45🔗 Drew So it's not like you're forgetting what's happening minute to minute and you don't know where you've been, what you've been doing.

57:49🔗 Caller I see like flashes of light like once in a while.

57:51🔗 Static X But you're just tripping.

57:52🔗 Drew Yeah. You should see a doctor by this because this can really get...

57:56🔗 Static X Take some vitamin B.

57:57🔗 Caller Stomach or something.

57:58🔗 Drew They what?

57:59🔗 Caller Eat your stomach?

58:00🔗 Drew No. It's just that you can get pretty nutty and do some things that can hurt yourself.

58:04🔗 Caller Dude, this is weird.

58:05🔗 Adam Hey, Andrew.

58:06🔗 Caller What's up? Adam, you kick ass, Adam.

58:08🔗 Adam Thank you.

58:08🔗 Drew He sounds like he's getting married.

58:10🔗 Caller Were you on Family Guy? Were you the Death Guy?

58:13🔗 Adam Yeah, I was.

58:14🔗 Caller Dude, that was pretty funny.

58:15🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, it's better when you're really high.

58:17🔗 Caller Dude, I was tripping out on you.

58:20🔗 Adam Yeah, you couldn't see my face, so I was wearing a hood.

58:22🔗 Caller Then when you touched that girl because you hated her.

58:24🔗 Adam Yeah. Oh, don't give away the ending.

58:25🔗 Caller Come on.

58:26🔗 Caller Dude, it already came out.

58:27🔗 Adam Oh, that's right.

58:28🔗 Caller Yeah.

58:29🔗 Adam I touched this girl because I hated her. Hey, Andrew. What's up, dude? Junior college or what are you doing?

58:35🔗 Caller Straight bum.

58:37🔗 Adam You're not working, huh?

58:37🔗 Caller I'm just chilling at home skateboarding all day.

58:39🔗 Adam You graduated high school?

58:41🔗 Caller I graduated from John Glenn High.

58:42🔗 Adam Oh, fantastic. And don't your parents want you to get a gig, move out of house?

58:47🔗 Caller Oh, they always bug me about getting jobs, but all I want to do is just be on my board and use an acre.

58:52🔗 Static X Right. People make a good living off of that, dude.

58:55🔗 Adam That's true. Let's not discourage your boy.

58:57🔗 Static X Watch the X Games on ESPN.

58:59🔗 Caller X Games, they ask what everyone's talking about.

59:00🔗 Drew Andrew, really, you're going to have to be careful that you could really get hurt with that.

59:04🔗 Adam Where did you get the plant?

59:05🔗 Caller From a neighborhood.

59:09🔗 Drew Was it Morning Glory Plant?

59:10🔗 Caller No, they're yellow and they look like bells.

59:13🔗 Adam Did you just go pick them?

59:14🔗 Caller No, my friend said that if you take the stems off, and like the inside of it, and then you cook it into a tea. Right. It was a tea and you're supposed to only take one, from what people say. But me and the baby, it took two, two and a half cups.

59:29🔗 Right.

59:31🔗 Caller I'm still on it right now.

59:32🔗 Adam Okay. But did you guys go out and pick the plant? Yeah. So you just, it just grows wild.

59:38🔗 Caller It just grows wild.

59:39🔗 Adam All right. Good time.

59:40🔗 Drew There's gypsum weed.

59:41🔗 Adam All right. Hey, Andrew.

59:42🔗 Caller What's up, Adam?

59:43🔗 Adam Listen, you need every ounce of your brain to get yourself even a crappy job. You understand that concept?

59:51🔗 Caller Yeah.

59:51🔗 Adam You realize that if you concentrate as hard as you can and you put every ounce of effort into it, you're probably just going to get a crappy job. You have to do that. You understand me? You have to move out of your parents' house. Give yourself a nice gig.

1:00:05🔗 Caller Get a skill.

1:00:06🔗 Adam You have to do it.

1:00:07🔗 Yeah.

1:00:08🔗 Caller All right.

1:00:08🔗 Adam And no more crazy drugs.

1:00:10🔗 No, it isn't.

1:00:11🔗 Caller All right.

1:00:11🔗 Drew See, what people don't understand is that he's going to come down from this and he'll be at an increased risk of real serious depressions. And imagine this guy depressed. He's never going to get off the couch.

1:00:21🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:00:21🔗 Drew They'll find the springs growing into his ass after a few months. I mean, they really will. So you can really disable them.

1:00:28🔗 Adam First off, I don't know if furniture has springs in it anymore.

1:00:31🔗 Drew At this guy's house? Think about it.

1:00:33🔗 Adam Oh, it's probable. That's true. It's probable. No, are you kidding? They're still in the horse hair era. They haven't even hit the spray. It's filled with hay.

1:00:40🔗 Static X Bean bag chair.

1:00:41🔗 Adam His grandmother has a brand new sofa from 1937 and has horse hair in it. These headphones are driving me insane now. I don't know what to do. Should I?

1:00:50🔗 Static X They shorten out on you, too?

1:00:51🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:00:52🔗 Drew Do you want to switch? I don't get distracted.

1:00:55🔗 Adam I don't know if it's my headphones or it's the jack.

1:00:57🔗 Drew It was my mic. My mic was screwed up.

1:00:59🔗 Adam Let me try your headphones. Are you ready?

1:01:02🔗 Static X Go.

1:01:02🔗 Adam You tell me what that sounds like.

1:01:06🔗 Static X Hey, Wayne, I'll change your headphones.

1:01:08🔗 Drew This thing's...

1:01:08🔗 Adam No way. Yeah, is it bad?

1:01:09🔗 Static X Come on.

1:01:10🔗 Drew I'll get it over there on your side.

1:01:12🔗 Static X I just have this uneaten piece of biscotti.

1:01:14🔗 Adam Ah, there we go. Thank God.

1:01:17🔗 Drew This is working fine now.

1:01:18🔗 Adam Oh, it is? Yeah, my jack's bad then.

1:01:20🔗 Drew All right, is there a problem over there?

1:01:21🔗 Adam And I rarely say jack and bad in the same sentence, but this is one time I'm going to make an exception. But this is marginally better. All right, let's talk to Jimmy's 21. Jimmy?

1:01:32🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:01:32🔗 Adam What's up?

1:01:33🔗 Caller I had a question for Tony and Wayne. Basically, with the sound, all your programming and stuff, and your music, the drum loops and stuff like that, I want to know what kind of equipment and who does that in your band?

1:01:46🔗 Static X We have these midgets that sit behind the drum riser. And they play all the samples and all that stuff.

1:01:55🔗 Caller That works, I guess.

1:01:56🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:01:57🔗 Caller Okay.

1:01:58🔗 Drew Good time, Jerry.

1:01:59🔗 Adam That's the answer?

1:02:01🔗 Caller You don't want them ripping you off?

1:02:03🔗 Caller What?

1:02:04🔗 Adam No. I'm so distracted on this horrible Westwood 1 jack.

1:02:09🔗 Caller Well, you guys switch headphones again or whatever. I'll give them the straight answer. I use an Akai MPC 2000 sampler. It's pretty popular for anyone who's into that crap. And I just sample keyboard things off keyboards or noises off whatever, movies, whatever, and just sort of manipulate it and do whatever I want with it, put it together.

1:02:34🔗 Drew What's the device on the cover of your album this time?

1:02:38🔗 Caller That's our logo, and we just kind of made it into this half organic, half machine kind of thing. And I'm not really sure what all those...

1:02:45🔗 Drew Had no historical...

1:02:46🔗 Caller Details or...

1:02:47🔗 Drew Medieval meaning or anything.

1:02:48🔗 Caller No, no. It's something we just kind of came up with.

1:02:51🔗 Static X Something just pooped out.

1:02:54🔗 Drew Karen?

1:02:55🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:02:56🔗 Adam You're 19. What's up?

1:02:59🔗 Caller I got a question. I just started dating this guy, and when I was sleeping next to him, I woke up because he was wrestling around and found out he was masturbating next to me. And I've never had anything like this happen before, and I heard your show a couple days ago where a woman said that she had her boyfriend actually ejaculate on her.

1:03:18🔗 Adam Right.

1:03:19🔗 Caller Well, I asked him if he would, if he was like ever going to or not, if he ever felt like he says, like he told me his excuse was, is that he knows when he's going to, but he doesn't know that he's masturbating. So I don't know how that's possible.

1:03:30🔗 Adam Are you worried about this?

1:03:32🔗 Caller It kind of bothers me because I've never had anybody do this. I don't know if it's normal. He told me his other girlfriends knew that he's, he's done this with his other girlfriends.

1:03:40🔗 Static X Well, like, do you have sex with them?

1:03:44🔗 Caller No.

1:03:44🔗 Static X Oh, maybe that's why.

1:03:46🔗 Adam Are you sleeping in the same bed with him?

1:03:48🔗 Caller Huh?

1:03:48🔗 Adam You're sleeping in the same bed with him?

1:03:50🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:03:50🔗 Adam How does that work?

1:03:52🔗 Caller How does that work? We just started dating, so, I mean, I'm not one that just jumps right on to him.

1:03:57🔗 Adam I know, but why are you sleeping?

1:03:58🔗 Static X Well, at least get my hand job. I mean, if you're sleeping with the guy, come on. Give the guy a break.

1:04:05🔗 Caller I guess that's my fault. I am neglecting, but I still think it's kind of weird because he told me to. I was like, well, he called me that.

1:04:09🔗 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:04:09🔗 Static X He should at least, like, run to the bathroom.

1:04:11🔗 Drew What did he say? What did he say?

1:04:12🔗 Adam Hold on a second. I'd really like to take this moment to discuss the stupidity of our callers, which is I'm saying you just started dating this guy. You're not sleeping with him.

1:04:25🔗 Drew Why stand the same guy?

1:04:25🔗 Adam Why are you sleeping? What's with the sleepover aspect of the relationship?

1:04:30🔗 Drew I don't think she understands what that means.

1:04:32🔗 Adam She does not think that's strange or peculiar at all and has no idea why anyone would be asking that question.

1:04:39🔗 Caller Yeah, I've jumped into relationships like that with other guys and I end up getting...

1:04:42🔗 Drew No, Karen, Karen, that's not the question.

1:04:43🔗 Static X You're kind of jumping the gun by sleeping in the same bed.

1:04:47🔗 Drew Right, isn't that sort of inappropriate?

1:04:48🔗 Caller Well, he lives about a half hour away from me so we don't get to see each other very often. So it's like we have our weekend together.

1:04:54🔗 Adam Half hour by jet copter or by car?

1:04:57🔗 Caller By car.

1:04:59🔗 Static X Half hour is nothing.

1:05:00🔗 Caller That's not very far.

1:05:01🔗 Adam Half hour.

1:05:02🔗 Caller I drove for an hour to get here.

1:05:03🔗 Drew Yeah, half hour of the studio.

1:05:05🔗 Adam I'm here every goddamn night.

1:05:07🔗 Static X Yeah, it's like going to work or something.

1:05:09🔗 Adam I'd say Karen really knows how to drive a point home, though. He does live like 18 miles from my house. And what's he have? A moped or a donkey? What's he use for transportation?

1:05:21🔗 Caller Just his car.

1:05:21🔗 Adam He has a car.

1:05:23🔗 Static X I mean, even rollerblades, it'd take you an hour.

1:05:25🔗 Adam So you're saying if this guy has, if you guys have an eight o'clock date, he has to be-

1:05:29🔗 Caller Well, he lives on the other side of the border, too.

1:05:31🔗 Static X Right.

1:05:31🔗 Adam He has to be in his car by 7.30? Is that what you're saying?

1:05:35🔗 Caller I don't know.

1:05:37🔗 Adam All right. He lives on the other side of the border?

1:05:40🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:05:40🔗 Adam You're in Michigan?

1:05:41🔗 Caller Right.

1:05:42🔗 Adam He's in Canada?

1:05:43🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:05:43🔗 Static X Oh, he's Canadian.

1:05:45🔗 Caller That explains a lot of stuff.

1:05:46🔗 Adam Does he have trouble getting back and forth as to deal with the border?

1:05:48🔗 Static X That explains his deviant behavior.

1:05:50🔗 Caller Well, it's not that he works, too. So it's the fact that his job and then me come over. So it's just the fact that we just spend the weekends together.

1:05:59🔗 Adam All right.

1:05:59🔗 Drew But how about sleeping in separate areas?

1:06:01🔗 Adam How long have you been dating?

1:06:04🔗 Caller Only about three weeks.

1:06:06🔗 Drew You're giving him confusing messages and his physiology is responding accordingly.

1:06:10🔗 Adam Right.

1:06:11🔗 Caller The thing is how you guys say that it's because of the fact that I'm not sleeping with him. Well, his other girlfriend slept with him right away and yet he still did it with them.

1:06:18🔗 Drew No, Karen. That's not even the issue. We're just saying this whole situation is flawed. It's not appropriate for you to be sleeping in the same bed with him. He's going to do what he's going to do and that's that. But if you're creating a boundary there, you don't want to get going in that direction, then do that. Don't sort of extend him down the path and then expect him to stop the train in his tracks.

1:06:41🔗 Static X Make him sleep on the couch.

1:06:42🔗 Adam On the other hand, this guy is...

1:06:45🔗 Drew Diabolical, yeah.

1:06:47🔗 Adam This early. You know, there's that part of the dating process where you don't want them to know what kind of asshole you really are. It's usually the first couple of months. Like all that deviant crap you do, that thing I do where I cut my hand and I fart into it and then I wave it into my mouth and stuff.

1:07:03🔗 Drew You were actually able to withhold that for a few months?

1:07:05🔗 Adam I didn't start that until like week number five or six.

1:07:09🔗 Drew Oh, that must have been so tough for you.

1:07:10🔗 Adam Well, there's a window because if you go too long, then you can't do it.

1:07:13🔗 Drew And it's weird.

1:07:13🔗 Adam You understand? You got to start somewhere between week five and week nine, but that's in the book. I'll get into that later. My dating do's and don't. I'll tell you the funniest thing I ever did with my girlfriend. I love this story. I was driving my car. It was a couple of months in the relationship, and driving down to Moorpark Boulevard over here in Toluca Lake, and I let a big, rip a big one, and I'm driving the car, and I do the hand flap thing where I'm wafting it up toward my face with the hand, and she's disgusted, and she's sitting in the passenger seat, and she says, Jesus Christ, you have to do the thing with the hand. You have to flap it up toward your face. And I look at her and I go, I am driving this car. Do you want me to put my head between my legs while I'm driving? Do you understand that we could go off the road and get ourselves both killed? Use your head.

1:08:10🔗 Drew Did she get defensive? Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

1:08:12🔗 Adam I delivered it in the straightest, most angry way.

1:08:18🔗 Drew What'd she do?

1:08:19🔗 Static X Safety conscious.

1:08:20🔗 Drew What'd she do?

1:08:21🔗 Adam She just looked like a deer in the headlights for about two beats, and then I started laughing like just a mad man.

1:08:27🔗 Drew And then you locked the windows.

1:08:28🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:08:30🔗 Adam Now that's Jimmy's move. Jimmy locks the windows and then I open the car door to try to get some air in there and they start locking the car door too and turns the heat on, by the way, that's one of his big moves. All right, so what was this? Karen, what you're doing is a little bit weird sleeping with a guy you're not sleeping with and what he's doing is a little bit weird too.

1:08:51🔗 Drew To create a more appropriate, a clearer boundary with this guy if you don't want it to start going in that direction.

1:08:57🔗 Caller Mine's more neglect and his is more satisfying himself from the neglect.

1:09:01🔗 Drew Well, no, you're not hearing us at all.

1:09:02🔗 Adam He's trying to send a message too. When guys beat off, it's like, see what you're making me do? I didn't want it to come to this, but look what it's come to.

1:09:09🔗 Drew And you're...

1:09:09🔗 Caller It was the fact that I was going to sleep because I even like rolled him over and he was still just sleeping.

1:09:13🔗 Drew Well, listen, you may have got his engine running pretty high gear, but the point is, I know, he's all style.

1:09:21🔗 Adam Wrap yourself in Visqueen before you. Another Visqueen message.

1:09:24🔗 Drew Listen, Karen, just create that boundary and set it and that's fine, but don't be unclear about it. Sleeping in the same bed with him is very mixed message.

1:09:32🔗 Static X Yeah, you tease...

1:09:34🔗 Adam You take your average 19, 20-year-old, Canadian especially, they're super horny, those guys. And you give them a few drinks and you screw around, get to second or third base and then say, no release though, it's time to go to bed. And he goes to bed...

1:09:51🔗 Drew Right next to him.

1:09:52🔗 Adam Right next to him. And you feel that warm body right in, right against the groin. Every 19 or 20-year-old guy is going to do something in the course of the evening. I don't know if it's sliding a hand up somewhere, I don't know if it's touching themselves. Rest assured, something will go on in that evening. Jessica?

1:10:11🔗 Caller Hi Adam and Drew.

1:10:12🔗 Drew Hey Jessica.

1:10:13🔗 Caller It's so nice to finally talk to you.

1:10:15🔗 Drew Nice to talk to you too.

1:10:16🔗 Adam Say hi to Tony and Wayne from Static X, by the way.

1:10:19🔗 Caller Oh, hey Tony.

1:10:20🔗 Static X Hey.

1:10:20🔗 Caller And Wayne.

1:10:22🔗 Caller Anyway, I've been trying for the past week...

1:10:24🔗 Static X She doesn't like you.

1:10:26🔗 Caller Go ahead.

1:10:26🔗 Caller No, I've been trying for the past week to break my hymen, so my voice would drop and I could sound older.

1:10:33🔗 Drew All right, hold on.

1:10:34🔗 Caller Hold on here.

1:10:35🔗 Drew We need to examine this one, but after the break.

1:10:37🔗 Adam Is this a girl?

1:10:37🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:10:38🔗 Adam She wants her voice to drop?

1:10:39🔗 Drew No, it's a boy with a hymen. A B hymen.

1:10:41🔗 Adam She wants her voice to drop?

1:10:43🔗 Static X I didn't know the hymen was connected to the vocal voice.

1:10:45🔗 Drew We'll find out what she's thinking.

1:10:47🔗 Adam All right. We'll take a break. Back with Static X after this. Hey, everybody. Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That's B Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. System Up and Down, Henry Rollins, and Jerry Manthe from Survivor 2 and Long Beach Dub All Stars. This Long Beach Dub All Stars. I'm going to take a nap before we do that show.

1:11:16🔗 Drew Yeah, their work. It's like having the Insane Clown Policy in here.

1:11:21🔗 Adam Yeah, there's certain bands, not Static X, but certain bands in here where you really earn your money. Long Beach Dub All Stars. They're always drunk and rambunctious and God knows. We'll probably take three calls.

1:11:36🔗 Caller We really will.

1:11:37🔗 Adam But good guys, nice guys. Yeah, I'm just saying that because I don't want any crap from them.

1:11:42🔗 Caller Good guys.

1:11:43🔗 Adam Good guys. I love them. Love them like brothers.

1:11:45🔗 Caller Yeah, we have a saying, you know, when we talk about anybody, whether you're talking good or crap about them, you always follow it with, but they're nice guys.

1:11:52🔗 Adam Nice guys. Nice, nice guys. Static X here. Nice guys. Machine is the name of the CD, and we'll hear something else off of that in a few minutes. And let's get back to Jessica on Line 516, Jessica.

1:12:09🔗 Caller Hi, Adam.

1:12:10🔗 Caller Hey. Hey.

1:12:11🔗 Caller If I may take a moment.

1:12:12🔗 Adam Yes, you may.

1:12:13🔗 Caller I just realized something. Sunday night, I'm going to be watching The Man Show.

1:12:18🔗 Adam Thank you.

1:12:18🔗 Caller And I'm going to be thinking to myself, I talked to this man.

1:12:22🔗 Drew Yeah, what an honor. Right.

1:12:24🔗 Caller It is.

1:12:25🔗 Adam I'm going to watch it and I'll be thinking, I'm going to give this man a hand job in about 20 minutes. Thank you. All right.

1:12:34🔗 Drew What's up? So Jessica, you wanted to adjust your anatomy to change your voice?

1:12:41🔗 Caller Exactly.

1:12:42🔗 Drew Help me understand how that works.

1:12:44🔗 Caller Well, I heard people talk about how after you break your hymen or maybe after you give birth or various, you know, biology changing aspects of your life, they release endorphins or hormones, growth hormones or something. And they could help your voice break, grow older, or your boobs get bigger. I don't know.

1:13:08🔗 Adam It's true.

1:13:09🔗 Caller No.

1:13:11🔗 Adam Now, my sister, my sister sounded like Minnie Mouse and then her hymen broke and she sounded like Brenda Vaccaro. I swear to Christ. It's so true.

1:13:20🔗 Static X You know what? When I was your age, I had heard that if you put your penis in a vacuum, it'll like make it bigger.

1:13:27🔗 Adam Right.

1:13:28🔗 Static X It didn't work.

1:13:29🔗 Adam It didn't.

1:13:30🔗 Drew Adam heard about a Spanish fly and about some girl that killed herself.

1:13:34🔗 Adam True story. True story. My friend Carl, his older brother Kurt, dating this chick, you know, and he gave her some Spanish fly, you know, and he just met her at this club and he went in, stopped at a convenience store at a 7-Eleven to grab some condoms because she was so horny and he ran in just to get the condoms in the 6-Bank when he came out. She killed herself. She had impaled herself on the stick shift of the car trying to have sex.

1:13:56🔗 Drew True story.

1:13:57🔗 Adam True story. That horny Spanish fly.

1:14:00🔗 Static X So the moral of the story is have condoms.

1:14:03🔗 Adam He did her anyway.

1:14:04🔗 Caller That was the kind of guy he was.

1:14:06🔗 Static X Necrophiliac.

1:14:06🔗 Drew So the moral of the story is don't believe what you hear when you're 13, okay? That's what we're trying to tell you.

1:14:11🔗 Adam But Jessica, what's up with the crazy part? What's up with you? You seem kind of nutty. Yeah. Always, yeah, when you give that mad scientist laugh, it always smacks of guilt too.

1:14:26🔗 Drew Okay, you got me. You got me.

1:14:28🔗 Adam That's right.

1:14:31🔗 Drew It's a muttley too.

1:14:33🔗 Caller I'm sorry. I'm a little, you know.

1:14:35🔗 Adam Yeah. What's up?

1:14:36🔗 Static X Reminds me of something.

1:14:37🔗 Adam Are you crazy?

1:14:38🔗 Caller I'm trying to, the thing is I'm trying to front a band.

1:14:41🔗 Adam I see.

1:14:42🔗 Caller And I have to sound older.

1:14:45🔗 Adam What's the name of the band?

1:14:46🔗 Caller I can't tell you that.

1:14:48🔗 Adam Really?

1:14:49🔗 Drew She's up there in Montana.

1:14:50🔗 Caller Everyone will know who I am then.

1:14:52🔗 Adam Yeah. Do you play an instrument?

1:14:54🔗 Caller I play the guitar.

1:14:55🔗 Adam I see. And why don't you give a plug to the band?

1:15:00🔗 Oh, I can't.

1:15:02🔗 Caller Everyone will know who I am.

1:15:03🔗 Adam Okay.

1:15:05🔗 Static X And then they'll come see your band and isn't that what you want?

1:15:07🔗 Adam Right.

1:15:08🔗 Caller Do you want me to play the guitar for you?

1:15:10🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:15:11🔗 Caller All right.

1:15:11🔗 Caller Hold on.

1:15:11🔗 Caller I'll see if I can.

1:15:12🔗 Adam Do you guys, do you have, do you cover any songs?

1:15:16🔗 Caller Huh?

1:15:16🔗 Adam Do you cover songs?

1:15:17🔗 Caller I'll play you a song that I wrote myself. It's, I won't sing the lyrics because copyright stuff. I don't want anyone to steal it. But I'll play the guitar.

1:15:25🔗 Adam Sure. Now, I know you got to protect, you got to protect your art, man.

1:15:28🔗 Caller I sure do.

1:15:29🔗 Adam Hey, can, do you know Hell Is For Children by Pat Benatar?

1:15:33🔗 Caller Huh?

1:15:34🔗 Adam Okay. Hold on a second, Jesse. We plug that amp in. That's my big karaoke number, by the way, the Hell Is For Children. Really brings the house down. Yeah. Grandpa, you fell off the swing because hell. I dedicated to my parents before. I do a lot of talking in the middle of it. It's heavy. It's moving. Not a dry in the house, but I'm done. Hey, Jay?

1:16:01🔗 Caller Yeah, hello?

1:16:02🔗 Adam Yeah, we're going to talk to you for a minute while Crazy Jessica plugs in her amp. You're 14. What's up?

1:16:07🔗 Caller Yeah, I just want to say all you guys are great, especially you, Adam. You're a god.

1:16:10🔗 Adam Thank you. Yes, I know. Yes.

1:16:11🔗 Caller Yeah, I told the guy I had a different question, but I thought of something a little more important than I wanted to ask you.

1:16:16🔗 Adam All right.

1:16:17🔗 Caller Well, I was making out with this girl the other day, and I got it like not like a boner, but like barely up, and I started leaking. And I've noticed that every single time I make out with a girl or get like close to him, it happens and I don't know what the hell is going on.

1:16:30🔗 Drew That's normal.

1:16:31🔗 Static X It's called premature ejaculation.

1:16:32🔗 Drew Just be aware that if you decide to put your penis in someone, that it's fully loaded and leaking.

1:16:39🔗 Caller Well, I don't even have a boner, so how could it be like premature ejaculation? It is.

1:16:43🔗 Adam Well, no, no, no.

1:16:44🔗 Static X You ever see American Pie?

1:16:46🔗 Adam This is leaking. I mean, it's not an orgasm, but it's dripping. Yeah. But that's not what you would traditionally think of as premature ejaculation.

1:16:56🔗 Drew No, no, no. I'm sorry. It's... I didn't... No, no. It's the pre-ejaculate.

1:17:00🔗 Caller Right. Right.

1:17:02🔗 Adam And some guys have a bad gasket, and that's you, Jay. Oh, OK. Your dad's probably dribbler. Ask him about it.

1:17:09🔗 Caller Does that mean...

1:17:09🔗 Adam Wait for Easter.

1:17:10🔗 Drew Thanksgiving, yeah.

1:17:11🔗 Caller Does that mean I'm only going to be able to go for like 30 seconds or something?

1:17:13🔗 Drew No, it doesn't.

1:17:14🔗 Adam No, it just means that you can get a chick pregnant without having an orgasm because your penis dribbles. You see what I'm saying?

1:17:23🔗 Drew You get that?

1:17:24🔗 Caller Okay.

1:17:25🔗 Adam All right. Yeah, just stuff something down there.

1:17:28🔗 Caller Yeah, okay.

1:17:29🔗 Adam Look, a roll of bounty down there or something. That's what I do. Yeah, sure. A man pond. Yeah, put a man pond up there. Yeah. Shouldn't they make a small urethra-sized tampons, Drew?

1:17:44🔗 Drew You know what I mean? This is another one of your ideas that would not hurt.

1:17:48🔗 Adam I'd put one of those in. Urination, semen, what have you, just drip, maybe have an infection. There's some coming out of there. Why ruin a pair of slacks? Jessica?

1:17:58🔗 Caller Hi, Adam.

1:17:58🔗 Drew Penny pads.

1:18:01🔗 Adam You got your amp plugged in?

1:18:02🔗 Caller I sure do.

1:18:03🔗 Okay, hold on.

1:18:04🔗 Caller Can you hear that?

1:18:05🔗 Adam Yeah, sure can. What's the name? Now, is there a song that you can do that we know of? Can you cover a song?

1:18:11🔗 Caller Well, have you heard of Speeding Up the Slowdown from Better Than Ezra? That's one of my favorite ones. All right.

1:18:17🔗 Adam I know Better Than Ezra, but I'm talking more like MacArthur Park or something. You know, something we can all sing to.

1:18:24🔗 Drew Led Zeppelin.

1:18:25🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:18:26🔗 Static X The classics.

1:18:27🔗 Caller How about Walk on the Ocean from Toe the Wet Sprout?

1:18:31🔗 Adam All right. That I know. I know that song. It's going to be a tall order.

1:18:36🔗 Caller Go ahead.

1:18:37🔗 Caller I could sing this one.

1:18:38🔗 Adam Go ahead. Do Walk on the Ocean.

1:18:40🔗 Caller Here we go.

1:18:45🔗 Drew We'll decide whether she needs to change her voice too.

1:18:47🔗 Adam Right.

1:18:47🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:18:48🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:18:48🔗 Adam And a one.

1:18:53🔗 Caller Actually, you know what?

1:18:54🔗 Adam At the head of the trail.

1:18:56🔗 Caller Right.

1:18:57🔗 Adam Here we go.

1:18:57🔗 Caller Where are we going?

1:18:58🔗 Caller Okay.

1:18:59🔗 Caller Let me play my own song because I forgot how to play that. Okay?

1:19:02🔗 Adam Okay. Is it possible that you never knew how to play it?

1:19:06🔗 Caller I knew. I forgot completely.

1:19:08🔗 Adam Okay.

1:19:09🔗 Caller Okay. Ready?

1:19:09🔗 Caller Right.

1:19:13🔗 Adam This is a ridiculous show.

1:19:41🔗 Caller Ready for the will of the fair there.

1:19:43🔗 Caller All right.

1:19:45🔗 Adam Now the drum solo.

1:19:53🔗 Caller Okay.

1:19:53🔗 Adam Hey, Jessica.

1:19:55🔗 Static X Second verse, same as the first.

1:19:58🔗 Adam Alright, everybody. Now, just the boys.

1:20:02🔗 Caller Alright, should we see if she's still going on?

1:20:07🔗 Static X Let's check back in like five minutes.

1:20:08🔗 Caller Okay.

1:20:09🔗 Caller She needs a lower voice. Her voice is so high, I can't even hear it.

1:20:12🔗 Adam Yeah. Only dogs can hear it.

1:20:16🔗 Drew All right. Time for Static X song.

1:20:17🔗 Adam No, wait a minute. We got to keep going back.

1:20:21🔗 Drew Is this like a bad sore?

1:20:25🔗 Caller I shortened it up because I knew your guys are kind of busy.

1:20:28🔗 Adam Right. Right.

1:20:30🔗 Static X She gave us the radio edit.

1:20:31🔗 Adam Do you have one where you sing?

1:20:35🔗 Caller I have lyrics to that song, but I can't.

1:20:37🔗 Drew Are you a masochist?

1:20:38🔗 Adam No. I'm trying to get her. She wants to change her voice. I'm trying to figure out whether she should or not.

1:20:45🔗 Caller Do you want me to sing?

1:20:46🔗 Adam All right. Jessica, you hang on. We have to be a professional band.

1:20:50🔗 Caller All right.

1:20:52🔗 Adam Okay, Jessica.

1:20:53🔗 Caller All right.

1:20:54🔗 Adam Hang on.

1:20:54🔗 Caller Okay. All right.

1:20:57🔗 Adam Now, I just want to find out. Jessica, I think, is nutty, right?

1:20:59🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:21:00🔗 Adam Is she nuts?

1:21:00🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:21:02🔗 Adam You think she's a big gal? Do you get that big gal vibe from her?

1:21:05🔗 Caller She's just a little girl. She's having fun. She's probably a little nervous. It's all good.

1:21:10🔗 Adam Jessica?

1:21:11🔗 Caller Yes?

1:21:11🔗 Adam Are you a big gal?

1:21:13🔗 Caller Um, actually, I've lost a while away. I used to be heavy, but...

1:21:18🔗 Caller All right. All right. Okay.

1:21:20🔗 Adam You're down.

1:21:20🔗 Caller Yeah, I weigh 150.

1:21:23🔗 Caller How tall are you?

1:21:24🔗 Caller I'm 5'1.

1:21:26🔗 Caller All right.

1:21:27🔗 Adam Let me do the radio math there. Hold on a second. 5'1, 150. Do the radio math. Carry the 5's. 4'11, 168. Yeah. I did the radio math. We're going to take ourselves a little break. Then we're going to come back. We'll hear something from Static X. And hopefully, yeah.

1:21:46🔗 Drew We're going to hear a break.

1:21:48🔗 Adam Let's take a break. Yeah, we'll take a break. We'll hear something from Static X. And maybe another Toad, the Wet's Rockets song from Jessica after this.

1:21:57🔗 Caller Hello. This is your radio. Radio. Loveline will be right back.

1:22:02🔗 Adam Loveline, everybody. Static X is our guest. Machine is the name of the CD. And let's hear ourselves a song off of that CD. What's it called? This one is called This Is Not. Well, that was Static X from the Dr. Demento Static X interview. Drew and I just had a weird little smell there.

1:25:24🔗 Drew Very weird.

1:25:25🔗 Adam Very strange. Very strange, yes. All right. Machine is the name of the CD. Please go out and get it. You don't have to though, it's already been ship gold, but it would be nice.

1:25:37🔗 Caller But it put a smile on it.

1:25:38🔗 Adam I'm doing it for you, not for the band. Travis?

1:25:42🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:25:43🔗 Adam You're 19, what's up?

1:25:45🔗 Caller Yeah, actually, I got a question, or see if you guys can help me out with this. I've known this girl for about four years now. She just got done with a bad relationship, her ex-boyfriend treated her pretty much like dirt.

1:25:58🔗 Static X And you're looking to swoop in.

1:25:59🔗 Drew Yeah, you're going to save her.

1:26:01🔗 Caller No, it's not that. I don't know, I've found myself attracted to her, and I tried to keep her friends, but I mean, I just think I want a little more out of it.

1:26:12🔗 Drew Did you say you had lived with her for four years? Is that what I heard?

1:26:15🔗 Caller No, I've known her for four years, I went to school with her.

1:26:17🔗 Drew You lived around her for four years.

1:26:19🔗 Adam Okay, you think she has an interest in you?

1:26:21🔗 Caller See, that's what I don't know, because I mean, I've talked to her about my feelings and everything and how I feel towards her.

1:26:27🔗 Drew Hold on one second, Travis, this is just again one of those things where men and women are so different. She's down in her luck, he's like a bird of prey coming in on a small animal, while a woman, if a guy is down in his luck?

1:26:39🔗 Adam Kick him in the nuts and laugh, laugh like a hyena.

1:26:41🔗 Drew Isn't that amazing?

1:26:42🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:26:43🔗 Drew Yeah, he's like, oh, she's down, she's easy, oh, I'm interested now.

1:26:46🔗 Adam Yeah, as a guy, there's nothing you'd like more than to see some hot-looking chick whose self-esteem is at all time low that you can swoop in on. Yes, please, Wayne, don't take that moral high ground.

1:26:59🔗 Caller No, no, you know what? It's better to have a girl that has self-esteem than you can use.

1:27:03🔗 Drew Oh, it is, of course.

1:27:04🔗 Adam It is.

1:27:04🔗 Static X No, no, but like, when you're thinking just short-term, I guess, you know, she's easy prey.

1:27:10🔗 Drew Men go for that, men go for it. Women are completely shut down by it, and men are sort of enamored with it.

1:27:17🔗 Adam They sense your pain and try to increase it. All right, so anyway, Travis, you told her how you felt, and she said what?

1:27:25🔗 Caller She actually told me, because this was about three months ago when she just first broke up with her boyfriend. She said she needed more time. It's one of those lame excuses.

1:27:33🔗 Adam Yes, it is, yes.

1:27:36🔗 Drew Well, but then it might have been an excuse built on her intention to get back with her old boyfriend.

1:27:39🔗 Adam Okay. You can try one more time, Travis.

1:27:43🔗 Caller So try one more time.

1:27:44🔗 Drew But only once more.

1:27:45🔗 Adam Just once.

1:27:46🔗 Drew Once more. I suggest you go in asking for a date. Yeah, you have a real date in mind.

1:27:50🔗 Adam Yeah, don't talk in this sort of theory. Yeah. Is it possible that one day you might like me?

1:27:57🔗 Drew No.

1:27:57🔗 Adam Talk about what's going on this weekend.

1:27:58🔗 Drew We have concert tickets. Let's go.

1:28:00🔗 Caller Yeah, because I've been nothing but the kindest person to her.

1:28:03🔗 Drew No, it doesn't matter. Travis, come on. Travis.

1:28:06🔗 Adam Travis.

1:28:07🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:28:07🔗 Adam Listen to me. Here's the deal. And I think you guys would all agree with this. No matter what she says the next time you talk to her, there's a certain bottom line. Either you're going out with her or you're not. She could tell you she's in love with you. She could tell you, you're the greatest guy in the world. Right now, I'm not ready. Whatever it is, there's a certain bottom line. It's like you're going in for an interview. Do you get the job or not? I don't care what the boss says. Do you get the job or not? If you don't get the job, move on.

1:28:42🔗 Drew Then words are completely useless.

1:28:44🔗 Adam Guys, please understand that because women, no one wants to say, look, you're ugly, you're fat, I'm not into you, you have a small penis, your breath smells, I'm not attracted to you. It's uncomfortable. No, they go, no, you're a great guy. No, I'm in love with you. I'm not in love with you, but I'm in love with you. I love you. You're my best friend. You're great. No, one day. And then the guys start feeding them lines. Well, do you think one day, maybe sometime there might be a change? Well, sure, one day down the road. And then that's enough for the guy to build a dream on.

1:29:11🔗 Drew I just need some time now, just now. And I just broke up 12 months ago.

1:29:14🔗 Adam Right. Nonsense.

1:29:15🔗 Drew Do you want to talk to Jessica again before we finish up?

1:29:17🔗 Adam Oh, right. Jessica. See the band's going. She's just got off a tour, actually. Jessica? Yeah. Yeah.

1:29:24🔗 Caller You know what? I just found that tablature for a walk on the ocean if you're still interested.

1:29:28🔗 Adam Yeah. Let's hear some. We don't play enough Toad the Wet's Rocket on this. And I know, I know Static.

1:29:33🔗 Caller I never hear that.

1:29:35🔗 Caller They were the greatest band of the early night.

1:29:37🔗 Adam Static was, Static X was heavily influenced by Toad as they call it.

1:29:42🔗 Very, very huge.

1:29:44🔗 Caller Anyway, you ready?

1:29:45🔗 Adam Yeah. Go ahead. Okay.

1:30:05🔗 Drew It's not exactly a tone problem. Deepening the voice may not bring some of those things. It's a little more of a pitch thing.

1:30:15🔗 Adam They told the Wet Sprocket had it right, and they're very poetic when they sung Where Are We Going.

1:30:22🔗 Drew Prophetic, I think is the... Damn it, hold on. Okay.

1:30:29🔗 Adam Hang on a second.

1:30:31🔗 Caller You hold on.

1:30:34🔗 Adam That was her. There must have been an agent calling or something on the other line. Matt?

1:30:39🔗 Static X Labels knocking her door open.

1:30:40🔗 Adam Hey, Matt. Matt.

1:30:43🔗 Yeah.

1:30:43🔗 Adam You're 36. What's going on?

1:30:45🔗 Caller Hey, guys. What's happening?

1:30:47🔗 Adam Nothing. What's happening?

1:30:49🔗 Caller Just sitting here.

1:30:50🔗 Caller I got a question for you. Been dating this girl for about two months. Long distance relationship. We've hooked up about three times. I've known her since we were like 13, 14 years old. Real comfortable with her. I want to get her to do a little trimming down there. And we're going to see each other in like 10 days. So I want to give her, you know, some warning. But I don't know if it's going to, you know, she's kind of a little insecure. So I don't want to like make a big deal out of it.

1:31:17🔗 Drew What was the preamble?

1:31:18🔗 Adam He said they've known each other for 20 years.

1:31:21🔗 Caller Oh, yeah. I've known her for a long time.

1:31:22🔗 Drew And now you're going to start dating her or you have been dating her?

1:31:25🔗 Adam He has been.

1:31:26🔗 Caller We've kind of hooked up over the years, but she was she was in another state.

1:31:31🔗 Adam And she's coming out to stay with you.

1:31:33🔗 Caller She lives by some relatives. What's that?

1:31:35🔗 Adam And you want her to trim her pubes?

1:31:37🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:31:37🔗 Adam Are they out of control?

1:31:39🔗 Caller And they're not horrible, but they're, you know, I like it, you know, well, and she trims, she trims up everything for bikini.

1:31:45🔗 Adam And when's the last time you saw her pubes? 1974. When?

1:31:53🔗 Caller They've had a girl since then. No, two weeks ago.

1:31:55🔗 Adam Oh, two weeks ago.

1:31:56🔗 Caller Two weeks ago. We hooked up in the last two months.

1:31:59🔗 Adam You want her to trim it down?

1:32:00🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:32:01🔗 Static X Get yourselves one of those portable shavers, you know, and then while you're down there, just get it done.

1:32:07🔗 Adam He wants her to trim it off before she comes out there.

1:32:10🔗 Caller Exactly.

1:32:11🔗 Adam Yeah. Why don't you call her up, do a little dirty talk and start like talking fantasies, you know?

1:32:17🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:32:17🔗 Adam Then you go like, yeah, I like a girl with a nice little runway down that I can lay my tongue on. You and Maggie talk and probably respond.

1:32:25🔗 Drew You and Maggie talk and have it off the air. That's fine.

1:32:27🔗 Adam All right. Or maybe Jessica can compose a song asking her to trim her pubes. We'll be back. Hey, everybody. Well, there you go. Another fabulous episode of Love Line in the Ground. Next week, System of a Down, Henry Rollins, Jerry Matthew from Survivor 2, Long Leap Stub, All Stars. I want to thank Static X for coming in here, mainly Tony and Wayne from the band.

1:32:58🔗 Static X Thanks for having us again. Yeah, Skoolz, other guys.

1:33:00🔗 Adam Machine, Name of the CD, out in stores now. Look for them coming to a town near you and also on the Family Values Tour. I want to thank Ken, our substitute engineer.

1:33:10🔗 Drew Right?

1:33:10🔗 Adam Is that right? We got that right. See? I told you, Drew.

1:33:14🔗 Drew Good times.

1:33:14🔗 Adam Doing a great job for Anderson all week. And producer Ann for putting her feminine stink on the show and booking the guest. And Damien, the bald wonder, for doing a great job on the phone. So, until next time. Oh, and who else am I missing?

1:33:27🔗 Drew To Lauren.

1:33:28🔗 Adam Lauren, yes. And Lauren for doing a great job, bringing the dog in, having to try and hump everyone's legs.

1:33:33🔗 Caller Red rocket, red rocket.

1:33:34🔗 Adam So until next time, Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:33:38🔗 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

Episode Feedback