1:52🔗
Adam
That's right. White land owners should be the only people. You must own at least 700 head of cattle to vote. No I figure, you know, 100 million people vote and that seems like enough. Judging from the people that call this show, I'd say 50 million people would be enough. Hey, I'm alright with 10 people voting if I think they're smart. As a matter of fact, the more dumb people that vote, the more things get screwed up. If you really think about it, forget the presidential race, forget the gubernatorial race, forget about a proposition. Let's just say you're voting on where to eat. There's a good restaurant and there's a crappy restaurant. Now how many people you want raising their hand? You want a bunch of idiots from the farm belt raising their hand who don't feel like voting? Where do you think you're going to be? You're going to end up in an IHOP. You know, the Yahoo group. I'd be in a good restaurant group.
2:49🔗
Adam
Oh, who knows? Here's how I vote. I vote for whatever proposition and whatever official I see the least commercials for. If I see a proposition that's tons and tons of commercials, I vote for whatever it's against or for, you know, whatever the opposite of that is. I figure if someone's got enough money to throw at this, it ain't good. That's the way it works. All right. Dirk?
3:23🔗
Caller
Okay. I was having sex with my girlfriend and it was kind of rough. And I kind of slipped out inside of outside of her. And then I hit her pelvic bone and my penis kind of popped.
3:44🔗
Drew
Cracked down towards the base where it attaches to your body or right down the shaft somewhere. Kind of like the middle. The middle, yeah.
3:57🔗
Caller
I know. It hurt for a split second, but it was okay later. And I had happened before. And like the next day I'm fine and everything.
4:15🔗
Drew
Just lie down and get it. I don't know if they necessarily... It's not like putting your hand out there into the beam.
4:22🔗
Adam
Yeah. Let me tell you, if any... I've had an MRI. It is like... I would imagine it's like in a bad diving bell accident, is basically what that is. You put your torso into... It would be like a metal trash can and have someone beat on it with a wooden spoon for half an hour.
4:40🔗
Adam
Oh, thank God. Because I had this MRI and it's so funny. They're like, hey, you want to listen to some music while you're in there? Sure, why not? Then turn the music up so you can barely hear it. And you lie there while these random high-pitched bong sounds come out from all different... Or I should say gong sounds from all different directions and drive you insane. And I tell you...
5:04🔗
Adam
Yeah. And then they get on the mic every once in a while. Like I would simulate now if the goddamn reverb worked in this dump. And they go, could you stop flailing? Yeah, this is for my hand. I want to sue that guy who made me do that, by the way. All right. So, Dirk? Yeah. You got to have your junk checked. Is it swollen? Is it black and blue?
5:25🔗
Adam
Well, then you're fine. Well... All right. He's fine if it's completely fine, right? Because if he bursts that cavern in there...
5:32🔗
Drew
If you rip the cavernous sinus that's in there, you can cause problems with function. It needs to be repaired, sometimes surgically.
5:41🔗
Hello.
5:44🔗
Caller
Well, my question was, is I was out at a bar last weekend and I got together with a girl and we went back to her place when we were, you know, after we had gotten to know each other for a little bit, well, talk a little bit, go back to her place and start to mess around a bit. And once we started messing around, I figured out that she was a hermaphrodite.
6:21🔗
Caller
And I didn't know until right at that point. I was wondering if that would make me gay.
6:29🔗
Adam
On a technicality. You're now damned to a life of schlong downing because of this one incident. I'm sorry, Tom. But rules are rules.
6:42🔗
Adam
I know. And my heart goes out for you. And I wish I could do something about it. You know what I mean? It's like when somebody gets thrown out of a military academy for cheating, even though they were just covering for their friend or because they didn't have time to study because their family member was ill or something. And you wish you sympathize, but rules are rules. You go down, there's a penis down there. You're now gay from this day forth. You must then take the walk of shame that the gays take.
7:28🔗
Caller
No. There was a little bit of skin there, but it didn't appear that there were any testicles. They really didn't study it. They didn't...
7:43🔗
Caller
Well, it was like dark and then, you know, once I got down there, I realized that all that was there and I was, you know...
7:49🔗
Adam
Yeah, it was dark. Let me tell you. Hold on. You know what this is like? This is like saying, I got third degree burns when I went down to the market to get a quart of milk. Well, what happened? Well, it was on fire when I, you know, when I walked in, but I didn't notice it. And then I got back to the dairy section. I couldn't get out. Really? While you're heading up the street and the place was ablaze, you didn't you don't want to stop at that point. You didn't notice it. You just walked through the door and then got to the back and then notice you're in there. How do you not notice that penis on the way down? You've got to get a hand down there before your mouth gets down there. I'm really having a lot of difficulty believing this. Are you that far out of it?
8:30🔗
Caller
Well, maybe it was because we were drinking. I don't know what it was. It was just, you know.
8:39🔗
Caller
Well, once I realized everything that was down there, then I kind of like pulled away and I didn't continue after that point.
8:58🔗
Caller
I told her that I wasn't comfortable with that. And she was kind of all right with that.
9:13🔗
Drew
Sometimes there's something called clitoral megalene. Yeah. And you can also have ambiguous genitalia, which are sort of hard to tell.
9:29🔗
Adam
Yeah. Yeah. Listen, I'll tell you. Here's the deal. If you're some Charlie Sheen or something, or you're in a rock band and you go to a bar and you leave with a chick that night to go home and have sex, that's understandable. But when you're a goofy dude and you go to a bar and the chick says, yeah, let's head back to your place and get it on, expect the worst. Look for a surprise. You could get rolled. There could be a penis. It could be a boyfriend waiting outside to beat your ass and take your wallet. All you goofy dudes out there who have crappy jobs and are short and fat and don't look good and you go to a crappy bar and you talk to a chick. By the way, how much luck have you had picking up women? You should be suspicious. You talk to a girl for 10 minutes and it's like, yeah, let's go back to her place and get it on. Be very suspicious. Very suspicious at that point, right?
10:29🔗
Hello?
10:38🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Okay. I go to college down in San Diego and my roommate left the last weekend.
10:53🔗
Marginally, no.
11:03🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Okay. So we went down, me and my friend, we went down to TJ and we're like-
11:40🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Okay. And okay. Like if you knew us, we're like, we're like totally like just good girls. We like, we've never done like anything wrong.
12:01🔗
You don't even know.
12:05🔗
Adam
Here's the thing I don't like about this statement, you don't even know. It implies I'd like to know, which I don't. Not interested. But go ahead, Amy.
12:26🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
So then we brought that, we like, we're scared that like we get caught at the border and like, get arrested or something, because we don't know what goes on. So we poured it into like a water bottle. And we like, we went across the border and we brought it back to my room. This isn't really an interesting story, but-
12:45🔗
Adam
No, it isn't. No. That's the first time I've been right tonight. All right. So you bring the booze. You know what? Hold on a second. I've been to Tijuana a gazillion times. And let me tell you the debauchery that went on in that little slice of heaven over there known as Tijuana. First off, guys performing oral sex on stage, in the bars, in the strip bars, on women, on stage. Not by the side of the stage, not off in some dark corner.
13:14🔗
Adam
On the stage in the middle of the stage. Now, there was a great bar there called the Unicorn. Good strip bar. And it was great because they had a live band. In this band, they sort of played the music they used to play in the old Alaskan airline commercials. Like one guy, an old, like the guy, remember the bald guy from Benny Hill? Yeah. Three guys like that in a band. You know, it's funny when guys play brass instruments that have dents in them, like high comedy. One guy playing like a trumpet with a dent in it. Another guy with a drum kit, but no kit, just a snare drum. And another guy with an oversized guitar. Yeah, and the cymbal. And whenever the girls would come out, they'd just crank it up, like the trumpets, like old guys just sitting there. They couldn't even get a record going. And the women were great because they're mean. They just go walking out on stage, big and fat, big asses over there in Mexico, and they're dancing around. And guys start pawing at them, and they kick them right in the face. And they make this sound every time they kick, I kick them in the forehead. They walk on this little stage, they shake their ass, and once in a while, like I said, a guy reached in, grab him, ay! And they smack him in the head. Anyway, jeez, I don't know if I want to keep going with this story, really. It gets pretty sordid.
14:29🔗
Drew
This is where you pass out behind and get picked up by the police. And vomit in the ice container.
14:39🔗
Adam
Later on that evening. Yes, that's when I vomited in the ice machine and fell asleep in the alley behind and was smacked by the cop at the Billy Club. This place is where we used to bring the booze in because the drinks are very expensive at the strip clubs. So you can go to a bar and get a drink back when for 50 cents, but the strip club is like two bucks. We bring our own bottle of booze in, freshen our own drinks up, get a glass of Coke and keep it going all night with the rum under the table. But we were discovered right when another one of our buddies was going upstairs with a hooker and we got chased out of the place. It was like out of a bad coming of age movie. But anyway, lots of debauchery over there.
15:30🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Yeah. Okay. So we didn't know what we're doing, so we just kept drinking and drinking. We're just sitting there and then we get up and like, oh my gosh. But anyway, okay.
15:42🔗
Adam
Yeah. I got that vibe. Because people, yeah, they don't tell you to shut up enough, right? Know what I'm saying?
16:00🔗
Adam
Yeah. That's why you tell these long winded stories. Ugly, ugly chicks. They don't get away with it. They're like, Listen, Hank, let's go.
16:13🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Whatever, Adam. I had like these big, like huge, like red blotches on my eyes. That was two mornings ago. And today they're like, they grew bigger and like.
16:30🔗
Drew
Shut up, damn it. Think it's about a week for those vessels. So it's just, it's burst blood vessels near my lids, so.
16:38🔗
Drew
Did you do something with your whole, from the neck up or something? Something like. What? Like, batik you after your neck up or something.
16:45🔗
Adam
I had bloodshot eyelids when I was 16. I got drunk and fell asleep in the driveway. Or fell asleep is not a great way of putting it. I belly up in the, you know, in the hedge. I made it halfway up my driveway and I couldn't make it any further. I just collapsed like my feet were hanging out a hedge. My sister came home like one thirty in the morning, like, kick me, Adam. I'm like, huh? Come on, you want to get up? I'm like, all right. I went to bed. You know you've had a bad night. When you wake up the following morning, there's gravel stuck to your cheek from the driveway. Like, you get up and you go, hey, what's this? Oh, hey, it's driveway gravel where I spent the first part of the evening. It was a very ironic night. I vomited on my friend, John Tyler. He had two sweaters and he lent me one, and he was wearing the other one. He had like the exact same sweater. One was blue and one was green. I vomited on the one he lent me and then I vomited on the one he was wearing too. So I knocked out both of the sweaters.
17:51🔗
Oh, no.
17:55🔗
Adam
Now, my buddy Chet worked at the AMPM and he stole a half bottle of white wine. I drank about three quarters of the bottle and then just vomited the rest of the evening. Drew, how many times have you vomited from booze?
18:10🔗
Adam
A handful of times? Oh, really? Good man. Good man. Because I'm amazed when I talk to people. How many times have you vomited from booze? They're like, well, I can't remember. Maybe once, twice. I'm like, how many times have you vomited?
18:23🔗
Eighty.
18:36🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
When I was, well, first of all, I want to tell you, I listen to GIT every night and I really enjoy listening to you guys. You guys always give good information.
18:44🔗
Thank you.
18:46🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
But when I was twelve, I was raped and I got pregnant. That was my first time having intercourse or whatever.
19:07🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
I don't know. Because I was new to the town. She was like my first friend.
19:18🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
I was twelve and I had got raped. I was scared because I turned out pregnant. Being so young, my mom, even though I'm really against it, she made me get an abortion. Now that I'm seventeen, I've been with this guy for like three years.
19:51🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
I don't know. We just wanted it, but I think it was because I felt like I didn't have my dad.
20:01🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
I don't know, because he was like really making my mom do drugs that she didn't want to do.
20:22🔗
Drew
That's what sets you up for the victimization at 12, is having such a victimized dad and then abandoning him.
20:45🔗
Adam
No, I'd like all troubled young girls to go lesbian from 13 to 25. Then you can snap out of your lesbian stupor and get to having kids.
20:55🔗
Drew
We need to sort of put the star under like glass and study her. She's somebody who's able to actually make change.
20:59🔗
Adam
Yeah, I don't know. God knows what her boyfriend, but what did your boyfriend do after he tried to set her on fire probably? What did he do?
21:21🔗
Don't do it.
21:22🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
I don't know what's going on though. I have like so much like I'm always depressed and everything.
21:40🔗
Adam
Every ounce of success I've ever had in my life is doing the opposite of whatever my family did. That's what I've done with my life. Oh my God. I hope they're not listening. But here's my point. I'll tell you how I treat my family. They're like a guy who bets and loses every time he bets on a team.
22:03🔗
Adam
Whatever they do, you do the opposite. And that's what all you should do. All you kids whose mom was a drug addict, whose dad was beaten on mom, whose poor mom was molested and raped on, you go the opposite way. Haven't you gotten enough yet? You know what I'm saying? Yep. Why do it? Why go down that road? You know better than anyone how horrible a road it is. Why does that suck you? What's so alluring about that life of crap you've led?
22:33🔗
Adam
Why keep that going everybody? I don't know. Good. I'm glad you don't. All right. You guys are all lucky because I had something I want to say and I can't remember what it was.
22:45🔗
All right.
22:58🔗
Love Line is brought to you by Alive Line. To meet local people, discuss any topic, or just chat, call 222-CHAT. It's free to try. 222-CHAT. Welcome back.
23:28🔗
Adam
It is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. Here's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Carrot Chop in here tomorrow. Speaking of politics. And then the Insane Clown, Posse. And this guy scare me. All right, so we're talking tonight to Alison Byrne Field from Rock the Vote. Let's talk about Rock. What was the origins of Rock the Vote?
23:51🔗
Caller
Rock the Vote was started in 1990 by members of the recording industry. The atmosphere at that time was there were a lot of censorship attacks that were happening against the recording industry. And so the idea was to start an organization that could potentially immobilize young voters to address that issue. I mean, there are things like in Florida, record store employees getting busted for selling two live crew albums, and Luke Campbell getting busted for performing. So that was the idea. There was self-interest, obviously.
24:17🔗
Adam
And did MTV just sort of pick that up and run with it? Because like I was saying earlier, I always thought it was an MTV-based idea.
24:25🔗
Caller
No, we've always been independent from MTV. They're pretty much our primary media partner, but they have their own Choose or Lose campaign as well.
24:38🔗
Adam
Yeah, it's going to be an uphill battle. Yeah. How many? Okay, let me just do some math though, first of all, because I'm curious on some of these numbers. Well, probably, but I reckon there's 200 and I don't know, 65, 70 million people in the country, right? And how many of those are voting age? It's like 200 million?
25:03🔗
Caller
I always do Rock the Vote. I do not have the numbers on how many people are eligible to vote.
25:10🔗
Adam
I'm always amazed at people to do stuff for a living and don't know what I would consider the most basic elements of that job.
25:16🔗
Caller
But I can tell you all sorts of other numbers. You can ask me the right question. I'll give you the right answer.
25:25🔗
Adam
Okay. Well, I would say, and like I said, jump in, but if there's 270 million people, aren't 200 in the age to vote?
25:35🔗
Adam
Or maybe more? I mean, is there a couple hundred potential million people vote in this country? I'd say that's a safe assumption. Now, what percentage of those people vote? Do you know that?
25:50🔗
Adam
Of eligible people of voting age. Not necessarily just registered. So what we're talking about is, did you say, what year was that?
26:17🔗
Adam
Yeah, you're playing hacky sack. Right, right. Your vote wasn't worth ass back then. Now you're smart. See, that's my point. Why do we want you at 19 voting? And you're a smart one.
26:28🔗
Caller
Well, no, but I mean, the problem is, is that baby boomers aren't voting at particularly high numbers either. And so what's going to happen is that it's a voting is an act that you learn from your parents. So it's looked at as also a generational issue. It's not that they're suddenly going to grow into it. They've become so disillusioned with the political process that potentially the 18 and 24 year olds that aren't voting today are going to be the 38 to 44 year olds.
26:50🔗
Drew
There's one issue I don't know about. Legalization of pod. So all of a sudden everyone would vote. 100% of 18 to 30 year olds would vote on that one. And I think that would mobilize the older people too.
27:02🔗
Adam
I don't think people are disillusioned with the political process. I mean, I think that's kind of a cop out. I think people are so goddamn narcissistic now and every 19 year old thinks he owns the goddamn world that he thinks, screw it, I'm not doing anything. I mean, I'm not gonna, I don't think a lot of these kids would enlist if we had a big war like World War II. And I don't think a lot of them are interested in the process, not because they're disillusioned, but just because they're worried about their own ass and not about the country.
27:32🔗
Caller
No, but I think most people are worried about their own ass. I think most people, I mean, that's how most people vote. But because people are worried about their own ass and the fact that the candidates are talking about issues that are irrelevant to young people, they don't see their own asses in the clinical process. So if you could actually, even if it was just talking about college, money for college, and in a way that was relevant to young people, as opposed to Gore talking about tax breaks for middle class parents, where maybe, how do you talk about it in a way that's appealing to the college student that's actually putting themselves through school, or the kid who doesn't even think they can afford to go to school in the first place.
28:06🔗
Adam
Right, all right. And yeah, I guess all this Medicare and Medicaid and prescription drug stuff is not appealing. But on the other hand, like I said, when you're 19 and you're in college, what do you care? I mean, what do you need it? You're not paying taxes, you're not getting prescription drugs, you're not getting Medicaid, you're not worried about Social Security. Why should you vote?
28:26🔗
Caller
Because you want to be able to go to school, because you don't want to get shot in your high school.
28:39🔗
Adam
This college thing is a bar. Do you understand? That gets set. So 50 years ago, 100 years ago, when 10 percent of the country went to college, those were the 10 percent that we're able to move forward in life. If you raise that to 80 percent, it will all be relative. Now it'll be 80 percent. Now we'll have to move the bar higher, and those people have to get masters and then doctorates. You understand?
29:06🔗
Adam
So who cares? Now we got a bunch of people that say they got a four-year degree and they can go to work for their cousin's sofa factory back in Muncie.
29:15🔗
Adam
And by the way, I'm perfectly fine with this. We need a certain percentage of society that are plumbers, that are electricians, that are street sweepers, that are garbage collectors.
29:28🔗
Adam
Fine. Let them vote. And I don't want them going to college, is what I'm saying. I don't want stupid people going to college. I don't want to force everyone to go to college.
29:39🔗
Adam
I would rather a very small minority vote who are very well informed than a majority of people who are sort of fuzzy on the issues.
29:50🔗
Caller
Yeah, but it's not the, what is the breakdown between who votes and who doesn't vote is not that they're the well informed and the uninformed. It's, you know, the whole thing that you're talking about before where it's the white male landowners. That's pretty much where we're heading.
30:12🔗
Adam
Oh, please take a good look at them. Look around. This is the best country in the world.
30:20🔗
Adam
That's all I need to see. I've been to Canada. Canada's all right. I can see going to Canada.
30:26🔗
Caller
It was young voters in Mexico that changed, you know, that ended a 70-year rain. I mean, it did. I mean, it was young voters.
30:39🔗
Caller
When are we going to get the marijuana issue dealt with? When George Soros gives some more money to... Do you know George Soros is?
30:59🔗
Drew
No, no, or maybe it was 39. The one that's allocating hundreds of millions to treatment as opposed to penitentiary.
31:05🔗
Adam
Yeah, I'm all for that. And I'm for the school voucher thing too. You know what I'm talking about?
31:10🔗
Adam
Yeah, why not? Okay. All right. Anderson, what are you giving me to look for? Anderson's not for it. Listen, I went to public schools. There's nothing going on over there. You might as well just let it. I'd rather let an ostrich teach my kid than send him to the public school. I went there. You might as well go to prison.
31:33🔗
Adam
These teachers, they sit around. They want everyone to kiss their ass, please. I don't buy it for a second. They got a strong union. I don't like that. Let's create a little competition. Let them go to school. Let them pay for it. And then let Drew over here get a tax break. He's got three kids. He's got little Lord Fauntleroy, a little Lord Fauntleroy II, little Lord Fauntleroy III, all going to a private school and doesn't get a break. Why not? You're not using, you're not, how much does it cost to send a kid to public school? Whatever, whatever it is, five grand, ten grand a year, you're not utilizing that. That's how much you should get off your taxes.
32:11🔗
Adam
And all these people that do this thing where they go, oh, this tax benefit's only going to, it's only going to help the very top 10% of taxpayers. Good. That's who's paying all the taxes, you idiots. Of course it should help them. Please. Marie?
32:29🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Basically, like, I had, like, kind of a two-part question. Like, technically, at what point are you not considered a virgin?
32:46🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Well, I was asking because, um, my, um, half-brother, like, while I was sleeping, like, and he came in my room. Well, I guess it was really his room because I was visiting. And I wouldn't call it rape, really, because he just went in for a sec and then, like, pulled out, like, after a second, I guess.
33:04🔗
Adam
Sure. I did that. It's an exploratory sex. And I did that with my sister, too. It's a rite of passage. What's up with that family of yours?
33:52🔗
Adam
All right. Well, now we can make a diagnosis based on the stuff. Hey, listen. Listen, come clean with us. What's going on? We're asking these questions. We're trying to get to the bottom of this. Try and figure out what we can do.
34:02🔗
Drew
Why are you to let your half-brothers lie down next to you and rape you and now you're thinking, did anything happen to me? That means something awful has happened to you before.
34:25🔗
Adam
How old was the cousin? I had a friend's cousin. Okay. So you live with your mom now, right?
34:50🔗
Well, it's not new, new, but.
34:55🔗
Adam
All right. Listen, I feel bad for what's going on in your life, but we're trying to do a radio show here. You have to answer our questions. And that goes for everyone. I don't care what your plight is. I don't care what's been done to you. You have to answer the questions you have to do in a semi-timely fashion, like today or early tomorrow. First thing tomorrow. I'll accept that. Forget that. All right, Marie, hang on. We'll get back to you. I'm just going to let you adjust yourself a little bit. John, you're 22. What's up?
35:20🔗
Drew
My girlfriend's driving me crazy because I lost my sex drive. I take Prozac. There you go. That's what Prozac does. What's the best one to take besides that? To not do that? What are you taking the Prozac for?
35:34🔗
OCD.
35:36🔗
Drew
Well, unfortunately, the drugs that are powerful enough to be effective for OCD tend to have very intense reuptake inhibition of serotonin, and that's what causes this depression of libido and sex drive. And so the Prozacs and the Luvox and those drugs, which will work for OCD, will suppress the sex drive, while the serosone, remeron, wellbutrin are really different classes of medicine that won't be as good for your OCD. They're good anti-depressants, and they don't suppress sex drive, but they probably won't do much for OCD.
36:11🔗
Adam
Just enough to get the gym socks off of the floor for the eighth week in a row, you know, kind of stepping over stuff.
36:16🔗
Drew
What we used to use is called clomipramine. You might talk to your doctor about it. There was little less likely to do this kind of thing. It's not as effective as Prozac.
36:28🔗
Adam
Clomipramine. All right. It's like half this stuff is like your trunk. I need some clomipramine and some...
36:41🔗
Adam
Remeron? It's like these are drunken gibberish words and not real words. Remeron? Who decides on that? When is that vote going on? Then somebody raise their hand and go, hey, Phil, Earth to Phil. Remeron cannot be pronounced. Let's come up with something else. This is called Class X or make another word for it. End it with an X.
37:05🔗
Drew
What I love is they make up the generic name. They make up the generic name and then they make up the trade name.
37:14🔗
Adam
Yeah. It just make it easy to understand. Please. Who are you guys trying to outsmart? I know there's a whole psychological thing to it.
37:22🔗
Drew
But the psychological stuff is sort of dependent on that moment. Like, there are letters that are the power letters of the moment, Z and X.
37:38🔗
Drew
Now they've got stuff for women. FemHeart. And they've got like HappyFem, which is basically Prozac. I forget what it's called. It's for PMDD, post premenopausal premenstrual dysphoric disorder.
38:00🔗
Yes.
38:03🔗
Yeah.
38:04🔗
Adam
That's all right. Listen. So your half-brother sort of had sex with you, right? But we're not interested in whether you're technically a virgin or not. Let's just say you are a virgin.
38:31🔗
Adam
Nice. All right. Do you really hate men by now, by the way? That's okay if you do. I'd like it if you would. No. You don't? Don't have any kids, please. Yeah.
38:53🔗
Drew
You've got a family with a lot of chaos. You've been abused by a stepbrother, abused by a cousin.
38:57🔗
Adam
I'm going to send you out a rape calendar, right? So you can work it out. About every ninth month, you'll get raped then. You want to do that? You want the rape calendar or you want to get some therapy?
39:10🔗
Adam
I'm sorry. And I'm sorry for what the hand of life has dealt you. But now you're almost an adult and you have to take care of yourself because your family's not going to take care of you.
39:26🔗
Adam
Not that these people aren't criminals and horrible people, but here's the problem. The world is full of these people. And the idea that you're going to count on them not to do anything is not a good way to do it. It's better that you work on yourself. You understand?
39:54🔗
Alison Byrne Fields
Well, I don't know. I guess I just forgot what to do about it, because I'm going to have to be doing them again.
40:03🔗
Drew
I think you should tell the police or the Department of Social Services. And you should not be alone with him ever. And you need some treatment. You need some help.
40:22🔗
Adam
Then talk to him. And tell him what happened, and tell him you need some help. You gotta get some counseling.
40:44🔗
Adam
I read three pages tonight. So far, no pictures, by the way. Drew gave me a biography on Teddy Roosevelt. Turns out his dad was Teddy Roosevelt, too. He's a second. Learn that.
40:59🔗
Adam
Sickly child. Everyone was sickly. I hope my kid almost dies. You know, like preemie, weighs three ounces, almost died at birth, has all sorts of congenital problems because then later on in life, they'll kill a bear with their own hands.
41:15🔗
Adam
Yeah, they go from three ounces in an incubator to killing a mountain lion at 13. That's what happens. It's the ones that start off healthy I don't trust. All right, we'll take a little break. Alison Byrne Fields is here. We'll talk a little more politics. I know that's what you kids want to hear after this. Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-LOVE-191. Thank you. Alison Byrne Field is here tonight from Rock the Vote, organization that was started up by musicians so they can make more drug money in the early 90s, and has now turned into a huge campaign. And yeah, MTV, I saw it original on MTV, and then they got the Choose or Lose. And I wish MTV would vote to pay their employees more. That would be a good vote. I'd like to cast my vote for that. So tell us Alison about what the plan is.
42:54🔗
Adam
Well, I mean, in a sense, you're here to plug something, in a sense, and here's your time to shine.
43:01🔗
Caller
Here's my turn to plug. Well, we're trying to do two things. One is to, because of the fact that when candidates talk are out there campaigning, they're not really talking about issues from the perspective of a young person. We're trying to help young people make the connection between the issues that they care about and their capacity to affect it.
43:24🔗
Caller
That's what they're trying to have done. And then we're also trying to let them know that in terms of their numbers and the fact that the majority of them are identifying as independents, that they have the capacity to decide this election.
43:45🔗
You both are, yeah.
43:47🔗
Adam
Yeah, it's not that I like the third party, it's that I don't like the first two. I believe they're just becoming... They're just bought and sold, you know, all this soft money and all this stuff. It's ridiculous.
43:58🔗
Caller
There was a survey that was done by Newsweek that says that 64% of 18 to 21-year-olds are looking for a viable third party. It's going to happen.
44:10🔗
Drew
Because I know that if somebody says, I'm going to legalize marijuana by going to the White House, they're going to the White House.
44:16🔗
Adam
I think Be Real from Cypress Hill may win that election. Here's what I want to say. Someone said to me the other day, listen, if you don't vote for Bush or Gore, you're throwing your vote away. And I said, no, I'm not. Because first off, if I vote for either one of those guys, I'm throwing my vote away anyway, because what's one goddamn vote? And number two, if people had done this in the last election, in the election before that, in the election before that, it wouldn't have been throwing their vote away. If you vote for a third party, you're not throwing your vote away, you're giving that third party momentum. You're building a foundation. And in a few short years, it'll be time to vote again. And instead of 12 percent, it will be 22 percent or whatever the figures are. So you're not throwing your vote away. You're part of a building process. Absolutely.
45:05🔗
Caller
Particularly those folks that are in states where, I mean like a state like California, where most likely it will go to gore just because of the strong base of Democrats. Folks can make the vote for Nader and help him in four years from now get the federal matching funds. All they have to do is get five percent of the vote. And in four years from now, they will get money from the federal government to run their campaigns. And they will be able to be more on level ground.
45:27🔗
Adam
Yeah, I don't think they are any good either. But what I want is competition. That's what I want. And to me, Democrats, Republicans, they are all becoming, they are meeting in the center. And they are all becoming one big sort of washed out mishmash of a party. I want some ass kicking in there. I want somebody, I want a nice atheist who has got a degree in psychology and sociology to come in there and just straighten this damn planet out. We can do it. Just do what makes sense. That's all. This whole drug war, it's an easy answer to all this. All this stuff that isn't working, easy answers everybody. Please, get $10 billion from this company and $1 billion from that company. You think that doesn't? Of course! What are these companies in the business of? Hold on a second, I'm mad. You know what companies do? You know what they do? They make money. That's what they do. And they don't throw away money. And sometimes they invest money, they give away money, so they can make more money later on. They buy a fleet of vans that cost them a couple million dollars, but don't worry, they're going to get that money back over the next few years. They give money to a candidate, they lose a little, but don't worry, they'll be getting it back. And if they didn't give it back, they wouldn't give it. And it wouldn't have gone on for all these years. And obviously, this is what they do. It's so transparent. I don't understand it. It's like Psychology 101 or Business 101. We'll take a little break. We'll be back.
47:11🔗
There have never been so many new Toyota cars introduced in one new model year. From the new luxurious 2001 Avalon.
47:34🔗
Adam
That's good radio. Man, you may have just gotten a new job. I may bump your duties up to 20 percent. What do you think? You ready, Ann?
47:48🔗
Adam
I have so much difficulty squeezing that in every night that I'm sort of, well, I'm happy for the show, but I'm sad in a way that it worked out because it really makes me seem worse than I actually am. Alison Byrne Field is here tonight from Rock the Vote, talking a little bit of politics and also Carrot Top in here tomorrow night and in the Insane Clown Posse on Wednesday night. All right, so Alison, what...
48:20🔗
Caller
We didn't always have to register to vote. It was something that was created as an obstacle to voting.
48:28🔗
Caller
No, it's definitely. And it's... I mean, we... you know, the deadlines for most states pat... you know, we're the first week in October and now I'm getting all these panicked emails from people, you know, across the United States who are like, I didn't register. What do I do?
48:41🔗
Adam
The people that are for registration, what is their argument? Because it seems to me that if you went and you presented your driver's license or whatever proper identification you needed to do with, you know, your home address on it, you went to the voting, what the hell do they call it?
49:00🔗
Adam
The poll that was designated for your area that it could be pretty easy to take care of. Why do we have to have that extra step? What do they say about it?
49:19🔗
Caller
Well, I mean, they bring up issues like fraud and privacy and it makes people very nervous and so we continue to support it. But I mean, there are, in North Dakota, there's no registration and there are four states that have same-day registration. Minnesota, Wyoming, Wisconsin and... Your favorite state.
49:33🔗
Caller
I can't think of the last one. New Hampshire. But it's one of the reasons why Jesse Ventura was elected. It's one of the reasons why Jesse...
49:44🔗
Adam
Oh, yes, he's a big fan of The Man Show. He's a genius, that Jesse Ventura. But why not? In some California, it's like three or four weeks.
49:55🔗
Adam
Right, right. Yeah, it doesn't make sense. Especially out here where people are sort of caught up in their own cramp and busy.
50:02🔗
Caller
Yeah, no, we do online voter registration. One of the ways to kind of bring it to people as opposed to making them try to hunt down, you know, the form. But it's really, I mean, all you're doing is you're filling out a form, saying what your, you know, your address is and then signing it and sending it in. And you know, it doesn't really seem like it makes sense to do it.
50:18🔗
Adam
It really just does seem like, I know people are fairly apathetic in general and people are, they procrastinate. And it seems like something you'd have to say. It doesn't seem like, it seems like it would work against the age group and the demographic that you're looking to get to vote.
50:35🔗
Caller
Right. No, I mean, you've got to like, it's things like people don't know that every time you move, even if it's down the street, you need to re-register. If you get married, you have to re-register. And you know, it's complicated.
51:18🔗
Adam
You know, a man grows up with a disability known as a deviated sempit and is punished throughout his career. Ridicule, made fun of. Go ahead, Everett.
51:28🔗
Caller
All right. So I guess I have two questions and they're both for Alison. I'm 25. I never voted. I live in California. I haven't registered. I'm wondering what's the direct effect on my life for me not voting? You know what I'm saying?
51:56🔗
Adam
You don't feel the crunch now, but eventually when your folks kick you out of the house, you know, may have some effect. You start working and paying taxes and things like that.
52:06🔗
Caller
I work, I pay taxes, I don't even, you know, I don't even care, you know, I just, I mean, I don't watch the news, you know, what is it, what is it going to do for me? Yeah. You know, all right.
52:18🔗
Adam
Well, Alison, you convince us, someone like Everett, what, and we have a, but these are, this is the majority of our callers and listeners, by the way, why should these people vote?
52:28🔗
Caller
Well, you, I mean, not voting, you've given up the one thing that candidates and politicians actually listen to, which is a vote. I mean, you have just handed over the decisions that you want to make about your life to somebody else that is probably not like you, that doesn't care about the things that you care about. You've just given it up, that's all. I mean, I'm trying to think of something that potentially will matter to you. If they raise the drinking age to 20, how old are you, 23?
53:04🔗
Drew
You listen to the candidates speak, and I'm sure that it sounds like they're speaking to Martians, these folks. And it's not clear that they're ever going to change and they're going to address issues that are realistic. Well, I think... I think what's going to mobilize is people have another party, goes directly after issues, it grows out of a groundswell of concern of theirs, and just go at it.
53:31🔗
Caller
Because they're the ones that are voting. So if you listen to the second debate, it was like you would think that everybody in this country was 65 and older.
53:39🔗
Drew
I really think that the next party is going to modify these guys. Whatever, I'm not going to mobilize these guys.
53:47🔗
Adam
Listen, I don't share your disdain for the folks that saved us from World War II. I think those people are heroes.
53:59🔗
Caller
No, they're fine people, and they show up at the polls, so people should listen to them, but they don't make up the same numbers that young people do.
54:11🔗
Caller
Yeah, I mean, it makes sense. I mean, strategists are out there saying, you have the goal of getting into office. Who are you going to reach out to? You're going to reach out to the people that vote. Why would you bother spending time talking to a bunch of people who sit on their butt?
54:26🔗
Yeah.
54:31🔗
Caller
That guy has always been gay, always will be gay, and he just needed someone to confirm it.
54:46🔗
Adam
Oh, my God. Here's what a bird's good for. Bird... All a bird does is cramp and make noise. That's it. It's like with a battery that never wears out, just cramps and make noise. And then once in a blue moon, you try to get out of its cage, putting your hand in there, it tries to take your finger off. You know, there was this bird... Let me tell you a quick bird story. When I worked at this boxing gym, they had a big macaw. Macaw is like a parrot, but it's blue and it's yellow and it's bigger and it's meaner. And birds are generally mean, by the way. They're not friendly animals. They don't like to cuddle. Birds don't. They like one person, that's their owner, and they don't even like them. Everyone else gets bitten. This macaw would get down, the guy would let the macaw run around the gym. I would get into the boxing ring and work with somebody. I had a plastic stopwatch, digital stopwatch, that I used to use to time the rounds and time whatever it is I was doing with whatever student I was working with. I would set it on top of the turnbuckle in one of the corners, one of those padded corners, okay? I started to think. The macaw would walk over from its cage, walk all the way across the gym, and it would come to the ring that we were in. It would then get itself onto the canvas on top of the ring. It was about two feet off the ground. And it was really funny because the macaw could make its way all the way up to the top row, the top rope of the rings around the rope. It couldn't do it in the corner, but if it got right to the center, they sagged just enough, it would reach up with its beak and would grab the little vinyl sleeve that went around the rope and it would pull itself up and it would keep doing it consecutively until it got to the top rung. Then it would walk around the thing until it got to where my stopwatch was, it would put its beak in the middle of my stopwatch where the glass was and crush it. And then it would let this blood curling scream out. Like every once in a while, just, I don't know if anyone's ever heard a bird when it goes, but these things, they're meant to travel all the way through the rainforest, from one end of South America to the next. And you're just sitting there and there's nothing going on. It would just like scream and then nothing for an hour. And then for no reason, woo!
57:01🔗
Adam
You just jump out of your skin. So I had this game with this bird, which is I would put the thing on there and I would be working with whoever I was working with. I would see it. It would come up the rope and it would be on the rope. And I'd go, okay, it's got to go all the way around before it gets to the stopwatch. So let's keep working. And I keep working, but inevitably I would forget about it, turn my back and I'd hear the crunch of my stopwatch. So I started bringing the two that the thing crunched and using his decoys. Take the two and I'd put it on the other turnbuckles and then the thing would crunch those, but he'd still get around to my other one. Birds are evil. I think that's what we've learned from this.
57:57🔗
Caller
Okay, my question is, is at what point in the female's gestational period can you have penile vaginal sex without the fear of conception?
58:23🔗
Drew
Although you can get her pregnant for, you can have sex within three days of that and still get her pregnant.
58:29🔗
Caller
Okay, because like a long time ago, like in the 70s or something, there was a thing where the couples went into the thing and they calculated her period and they could figure out the days that they could have sex without the fear of getting her pregnant. Yeah.
59:16🔗
Adam
That's right. Now, as a matter of fact, use a hefty bag and tie it up at the bottom with some duct tape.
59:34🔗
Caller
After my girlfriend gives me a blowjob, I go to take a pee, and it starts to sting. It'll continue to sting for like another minute to two minutes.
59:55🔗
Drew
Not necessarily an STD. There's other bacteria that can cause these things. And again, it's just some sort of irritation that is being caused by the encounter. It doesn't mean it's an STD necessarily.
1:00:08🔗
Drew
Yeah, of course. But it's a common complaint, and it doesn't necessarily mean anything, from oral sex. If you had that from vaginal, of course... Is that what you said, oral sex? Yeah.
1:00:23🔗
Adam
Let me explain something. The word complaint and oral sex, never in the same sentence.
1:00:32🔗
Adam
If I'm talking about oral sex and the word complaint comes to my head, I go out in the car and say it. I come back into the room. And I won't say it in the same room with oral sex. You understand?
1:00:42🔗
Adam
Call me superstitious. That's right. Oh, man. I got another good birth story. Chris? Chris?
1:00:51🔗
Adam
It's good. It's good, yeah. And it's not Rock the Vote. It's the show. Don't worry. It's us. We have at least a couple of sleeping callers a night. Yeah. No higher compliment can be paid to a host.
1:01:27🔗
Adam
Fat people hear it on the way in. Skinny people saw it on the way out. Fat people saw it way in. You know, and the skinny guys who way out...
1:01:38🔗
Drew
It's a Chris the Skinny. So when he wakes up, we'll find out what his body weight is. He's a lot of time.
1:01:42🔗
Adam
Do you want to guess on Chris's weight? Here's the deal. We could all guess on it. You know what? He wouldn't know it.
1:02:24🔗
Adam
I'll go between one. Oh, Christ, that's tough. That 140 to... You can't have 17 pounds. I'll give you 10 pounds. 147 to 157?
1:02:54🔗
Adam
All right. Let's put him back on hold. We can check in. It's always fun to hear him snoring anyway. You really have to be secure as a host to keep checking back when someone is snoring during a show. There it is. All right. Let's talk to Valerie. Valerie?
1:03:10🔗
Hi.
1:03:16🔗
Caller
I had a question about an incident that happened a couple of years ago. My husband was performing oral sex on me. It was a long time, but I went into this weird state where I lost control of my hands. They went in a really strange-
1:03:45🔗
Caller
My breathing seemed to be fine. I mean, it felt amazing. Nothing ever came close to it, but-
1:03:53🔗
Drew
And that will cause your hands to feed the cramp and mouth to become numb. You can do that.
1:03:59🔗
Adam
You don't do stuff you normally would do. I mean, what I'm saying is, you blink a certain amount an hour, you swallow a certain amount an hour, you move a certain amount an hour, and when you're having sex, all that takes a backseat to whatever's going on.
1:04:19🔗
Drew
There's another interesting difference between men and women. If a guy... That's alone. I understand. If a guy got that ultimate place, every time would have to be there. She's like, yeah, I think it was amazing, and then went on with her life. You know what I'm saying?
1:04:38🔗
Caller
Well, I lasted a while, so I didn't know if I went there again if I would ever come back.
1:04:50🔗
Adam
I'd like to just watch you go there. Forget about me. Now, you know what I think it is? I think a lot of women with their orgasms is, first off, it's like climbing Mount Everest, a lot of these women. They got to plan it out, get their oxygen ready, pack their dry food, and it's like, oh boy, it's a hell of a journey. It's not something you take lightly, but there's orgasms like a big mountain they got to climb. For a guy, I think it's the equivalent of a guy going for number two or number three in a short period of time.
1:05:24🔗
Adam
A lot of women. Do you know what I'm saying? Okay, Drew, don't close your eyes, but you're very passionate man, very passionate. As you know, I've stated that many times on the show, right? You're very passionate man. And you know that when you, as a man, when you're going for whatever your threshold is, when you're going for number two, number three, I don't know, maybe you're in high school and you're going for number five, whatever it is. But when you're going for the next one past the one that you may have trouble getting to, it's kind of hit and miss. And it's like your mind races a little bit. In one minute, you're into it like 100%. The next minute you're going, I don't know if I can pull this off. The next minute you're going, we got to do it. It's really something that goes on. I mean, it's really a deep psychological thing.
1:06:15🔗
Adam
You know what I'm saying? No. You don't know what I'm saying. No, as a guy, and I don't know the sexual, I know from a masturbatory standpoint, there's times when I had a little booze in me, you know, and it's like three in the morning, and I just did like an eight ball of coke, and I did some mushrooms, and I've done a little speed ball or something like that, and I've snorted no-dos or something, and it's like four in the morning, I'm thinking, I should really go to bed, but then I think, I'm going for one more. Oh yes, here we go. And then I think, no, no, and my scrotum goes, no way. No, we're going to bed. No, you're not. Come on, boys. Oh, you're right. No, no, no. And I'm like Vince Lombardi in the locker room talking to my genitalia. One more. One more, boys. You got to dig deep now. This is the fourth quarter. And my nuts are going, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You're drunk. You're tired. You whacked off 20 minutes ago. You're going to bed. I go, no, I'm going for it. I'm going for it. I'm going. And then once, yeah, I'm going. I'm going to climb those stairs at the foot of the monument in Philadelphia. So I dig deep. And I focus. And it's the eye of the tiger. I know mixing songs up here. But they're really focused.
1:07:31🔗
Adam
Right. I got to shut the TV off. I got to draw the curtains. Anything shiny. I got to turn it over or put some put a pillow over it. I really got to dig deep. And I say, move some furniture out of the way. Spread that paper towel out and really, really dig in and get going. And then you break once in a while. No, no, I can't make it. You get halfway. I can't do it. No more. No more. No. Yes. Yes, you go deeper. That's what I think it's like for a woman. I really do. Because, you know, a woman will be right at the brink of an orgasm. No, no, forget it. No, it's not going to work. And you're like, huh? What happened? I was right there. I was right there. I was on the doorstep. I was on the threshold. Yeah. Yeah, forget it. What? Wait a minute. You're right there. Yeah, no, it's not going to work. It's not going to work. Forget it. We'll try it tomorrow. What? How did you get right there? Yeah, I was right there. I'm sorry about it. No, no, forget it. Yeah, that's a chick thing, but a guy can get into that if he's going for the hand trick. That's what I'm saying.
1:08:32🔗
Adam
I will take a little break. Alison Byrne Fields is here from Rock the Vote. Did you enjoy that story more in the parrot story?
1:09:24🔗
Adam
Gioella, it's Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew over there. Alison Byrne Field is our guest tonight, she's from Rock the Vote, and Carrot Top will be in here tomorrow night, and then St. Clown Posse, and we're just talking a little politics. And you know, I really think the problem with the parties is the problem is the party.
1:09:45🔗
Adam
Yeah, what it is is you affiliate yourself with a group that has 50 good ideas and 50 bad ideas, and you have to stand behind them. So, it's great when they're talking about the 50 good ideas, but when we're talking about the 50 horrible ideas, you're still staying behind them and defend them. And I think politics should be, I think start a group where it was like a Jim Rummy hand. Let's just take all the good ideas and discard all the crappy ones. So we're just- No, anyway. All right. I'm done. I'm done helping the kids. I really am.
1:10:25🔗
Adam
They glide. I'll tell you, nothing better for your mind than staring at a hawk that's just on some kind of up current just circling a canyon. It's great. They're the world's laziest birds. They never flap their wings. They just get up in the air and they just ride that current making these big, wide circles.
1:10:41🔗
Drew
I never understood why they were called red-tailed hawks until I saw one the other day looking down in a canyon. They have a bright red tail when you look down from the top.
1:10:50🔗
Adam
They're beautiful and they just float around up there. And I just stare at them and think, oh, I wish that was me except for I'd probably get caught up in a power line or something. But anyway, one of them actually pounced on a squirrel and had then carried it up to a telephone pole and was basically eating it on top of this telephone pole. I was standing there going, this is great. Nature's great when you're from North Hollywood. It's like, oh my God, nature, everybody. Something's going on. That's not some bum that's eating his own vomit. That's a bird.
1:11:31🔗
Adam
I may have caught it after the drop. Yeah. The squirrel didn't seem, you know, happy. I think it was trying to get away and stuff. But there was that big hawk up there. Oh, that's a good looking bird. That's right. I know why a lot of I was looking at that hawk and say, no wonder everyone names their sports team after that bird and not so many squirrels.
1:12:06🔗
Adam
Alison, in a very cocky, brash, and bold move, 147 to 150, only leaving herself a three pound window.
1:12:25🔗
Adam
That was the McCaw story. We'll check back with Chris, see if we can get to his weight. Joey?
1:12:44🔗
Caller
Okay. We were at a party, and we were getting kind of messed up, and we started playing a card game to get us a little messed up, you know, beforehand. And then we decided to play spin the bottle, and it's kind of a dumb game, but we decided to do it.
1:13:17🔗
Caller
So we played that for a while, and then all of a sudden we started getting down and dirty.
1:13:34🔗
Adam
Okay. You really got to think that long? There's five people, you idiot. You don't know how many? Uh, let's see.
1:13:41🔗
Let's see. Who's this?
1:13:44🔗
Adam
There's Tammy. Okay. There's five altogether, including you? There's six. Six, including you.
1:14:42🔗
Drew
It's good for the guys, but the girls are still going to get exposed to each other's stuff.
1:14:54🔗
Caller
I was just wondering if you think it's weird that we enjoyed it and we want to do it again. Who's we? Yeah.
1:15:45🔗
Drew
Here's what concerns us more than anything, Joey, is that you can't describe to us the scene with any accuracy. Couldn't tell us how many people were there, left out the fact that your sister was there.
1:16:01🔗
Drew
It's such a wonderful experience that she has to have all various levels of denial to even manage her feelings about it.
1:16:38🔗
Adam
Hey, genius, remember how I worded that one, having your sister there in a sexual situation?
1:16:43🔗
Caller
Listen, let me tell you something. She's not my full sister, so it really didn't bother me any.
1:17:12🔗
Adam
Yes, hold on a second. Hey, junior college. I smell, let's say, I smell beef jerky, pot, and patchouli oil. Yeah, yeah, that's junior college, all right. Some cigarettes? I smell Haki Sack. Wet Haki Sack's been left out in the rain. Yeah, that's what I smell. That's junior college. All right, so listen, what's your name?
1:17:42🔗
Adam
You wouldn't? And I like, I'll ask again, though, wasn't it strange having your sister so near that close to being so nearby during a sexual encounter?
1:17:58🔗
Caller
It wasn't weird having her in the same room when I was playing with boys. It was fun. I liked it and that's that. It wasn't weird.
1:18:27🔗
Caller
Well, my dad, when my mom and dad first got married, he cheated on my mom and that's where my sister Joey came in and then he, my mom forgave him and what not. And so they've been, I've been like living with my mom and dad, she lives with her mom.
1:18:45🔗
Drew
So what, where is this? This dad must be the alcoholic. That's where the genes coming from.
1:19:07🔗
Caller
I'm really not. That's the weird part about it, is I'm not angry. I just think, I don't know, I kind of liked my experience.
1:19:14🔗
Drew
I understand that things that induce thrill and sort of extreme experiences are going to be very compelling for you because of the biological makeup, the genetic predisposition towards alcoholism. So these things that other people might find sort of uncomfortable, you're going to find as gratifying. But understand that it's all part of...
1:19:33🔗
Drew
No, it's all part of how people with the gene for alcoholism manage feelings and it tends to build in a direction that isn't healthy. So just be aware of that.
1:19:44🔗
Caller
Actually, this is like a whole nother Geraldo, but I have my own boyfriend and he's like a good Mormon boy, doesn't know anything about it. And so I like keep this away from him because I really want the stability with him. But I, you know...
1:20:06🔗
Drew
That's what I'm saying. Thrill, Joey. Melissa, it's thrill, but not so much the chaos. The chaos is something that you're into, but the thing you really thrive on is the thrill.
1:20:14🔗
Adam
Well, the chaos is a byproduct of the thrill, which is you go do something thrilling and then you get busted.
1:20:32🔗
Adam
Oh, who cares about him? You're going to dump him soon anyway because he's not an A-hole.
1:20:54🔗
Caller
Because we want to graduate college and we want to become somebody and I don't think we could do that with children.
1:20:59🔗
Adam
Oh, really? Okay. That's good. That's good thinking. I'm glad to hear that kind of thinking.
1:21:03🔗
Caller
All of our friends, my sister and I, they all got knocked up in high school and we're a bunch of losers. We just didn't want to be like that.
1:21:14🔗
Drew
Just realize this is all about addiction and keep your eyes open as this thing evolves.
1:21:32🔗
Adam
I get the feeling Joey probably would like to be with one of them alone rather than being a group.
1:21:36🔗
Caller
Right. Yeah. Well, she has her time to be along with him. So, it worked out well for her.
1:21:43🔗
Adam
All right. Have fun at that reunion. Hey, yeah. Easy. Easy on the booze, baby. It's going to take over soon. All right?
1:21:51🔗
Adam
All right. Listen, thank you. And have fun in Junior College. Tell them I said hi over there. Listen, I know my grandmother, when he gave me an earful about you, I got to buy it. My grandmother keeps a list of stuff she wants to talk to me about from the show. It's great. Yeah. My grandmother keeps a list of stuff she disagrees with me about. Then when I go to lunch with her, she goes over the list. Junior College. I went to Junior College. I'm like, yeah. Yeah, I know. Your mother, yeah, that's right. Your mother went to Junior College. And your father, he went to Santa Monica. That's right. And how old were you? We were in our 40s. You know, my entire family graduated from college. Average age, college graduation?
1:22:41🔗
Adam
Junior College, please. All right, we'll take ourselves a little break. We'll be back with more of the show after this.
1:23:13🔗
Ninety-four, seven, and RK.
1:23:25🔗
Drew
Hey, it's Loveline. There we go. I found out I'm going to be in that Men and Women from Mars, Women and Venus show tomorrow. The Civil Shepherd show.
1:23:44🔗
Drew
Yes, syndicated show. Check your local listings, yeah. This is the Civil Shepherd show. But you know what? It's a show that you and I have talked about for a long time, which is basically politically incorrect about relationships. I mean, it works.
1:24:11🔗
Adam
Yeah. Oh, no. No way. That's great. I really have a great career, which is, well, I'm in Sherman Oaks working on my house. So where is this? Is it North Hollywood or Sherman Oaks? No, it's over in Culver Studios. What time? Oh, like two or three o'clock. Oh, no, no, no. Too much traffic. Sorry. Nothing personal. This traffic. If it was by me, I'd do it. I'd do it tomorrow. I'd do five of them. I'd do a public access show. It's not the size of the thing. It's the driving part that gets me. And I don't know how it works, but it seems like all the good stuff's in like Santa Monica and Culver City and Westwood and West LA. And if you're, it's bad driving around here. It's really a lot of traffic.
1:25:02🔗
Adam
Yeah. It's over. It's over. So all you guys, all you actors, can return to work. can return to work. And just make sure you get there early so you can catch the Brush Runch. Brush Runch. The Brunch Rush is what I meant to say. Yes, because you'll be bringing coffee to folks who have jobs. You can't articulate yourself any better than that. Put the Brush Runch on a card, too, so you can back up the articulate one, too, in case something ever happens to that tape.
1:25:34🔗
Thank you.
1:25:35🔗
Adam
All right, so you guys can all head back to not working tomorrow. Thank you very much. Fantastic. John, and what happened, by the way, with that actor's strike? Did they get anything?
1:25:46🔗
Adam
Oh, that's too bad. I like the idea that they wanted people to boycott Procter & Gamble and all the other companies. Yeah, there's a lot of sympathy going out for the actors out there. The working man really sympathizes with the plight of the guys who sit around and eat and do nothing all day and make a ton of money. I know all the Latino guys I work with and pay 12 bucks an hour and barely feed their kids, these guys were talking. I overheard in Spanish they're talking about boycotting Procter & Gamble. Sure, sure, our hearts go out.
1:26:21🔗
Caller
Me and my girlfriend have been together for about three years now and we've been having sex for about two of the years and the whole time she's not had an orgasm. I'm trying to figure out any way I can help her because I want her to feel the same experiences that I feel and I just want her to be a part of this more than... I don't know what to do. We've tried everything.
1:27:07🔗
Adam
I don't know. Listen, if I'm by myself, I'll put my whole fist in my ass. I don't care. By myself. Count me in. Whatever it is. I'll do the weirdest things in the world. Only women can feel uncomfortable by themselves. I'm home. I'm alone. I'm not comfortable with me and doing what I'm doing to me right now. Guys, guys be doing like a line of coke and putting their other fist in their ass. I've got a bowl. I've got a lamp in my ass. I'm doing a line of coke. I'm whacking off to my grandparent's anniversary shot from the 50th anniversary part. I'm watching tape of that right now. I'm mad. I'm crying. No, I'm wearing a dunce cap while I'm doing it. I've got a Hitler mustache I've taken and put in with the marks a lot. By yourself, fine. I'm always amazed at what women are comfortable with but not uncomfortable by themselves.
1:27:59🔗
Drew
But that just shows how different the biology is, so different. It doesn't make sense to them.
1:28:10🔗
Drew
Oh, 19. By the way, there's some data that does correlate that energy that men have with testosterone levels and in women the same thing. Women that have higher testosterone levels have a greater propensity to masturbate.
1:28:23🔗
Adam
All right. So, John, you may be in a... Listen, why don't you get her a vibrator? See if that works.
1:28:37🔗
Drew
That's a different thing. That's not... I've tried everything. That she's anxious about stuff. Yeah.
1:28:43🔗
Adam
If she wants to have an orgasm, yet she's uncomfortable trying... attempting to do things that will give her an orgasm, then she gets no orgasm.
1:28:53🔗
Adam
It's like, I want to be triathlete. I'm not comfortable with the cycling or the swimming aspect of it, but yet I'd really... Nope, you can't be one. You gotta get in the goddamn water and get on the bike, or you don't get to be one. You can't say both. She's uptight and he's freaked out about it.
1:29:07🔗
Drew
Should we do any Rock the Vote discussion here? Rock the Vote rather than Rock the Vote.
1:29:15🔗
Adam
Well, it's not like we've discussed it periodically, haven't we? Much as we plug anything else.
1:29:43🔗
Adam
I have disdain for people who sleep well because I don't. I get angry with them. I wish I could. You know what I like? I like the guys who snore and then claim they don't snore. Like my partner, Jimmy Kimmel. He does some fairly world-class snoring.
1:30:02🔗
Adam
The more hair and the more gut you got, the more snoring you do. And he does some serious snoring, you know? And when we travel sometimes, he's just staying in the same room. We'll stay in the same room. I go, I don't know, Jimmy, you snore. I do not. I'm like, yeah, you're right. I thought I could pull one over on you. I always go, why would I bring it up? Why would I say it? Plus, you know what that guy did? He whacked off in a bathtub once and I was standing in it. So, you know, the honeymoon's over.
1:30:30🔗
Drew
He didn't jack off into the tub while he was standing in it. He vacated the tub just after having done that and allowed his partner to walk in there and shower.
1:30:39🔗
Adam
We were staying at a motel in Seattle for the Final Four, K-Rock. The mother station here had put us up over there. And K-Rock being K-Rock, by the way, you travel with K-Rock, you fly tower air and they put you up in a motel that is 70 miles out of Seattle. Where the kind where you get woken up at night because the car pulls in and the headlights shine through your window. Oh, Jesus, are they cheap over there? Oh, my God, are they cheap? But anyway, I don't know why Kevin and Bean put up with that. But here's my point. We're bunking up in the same dump way in the outskirts of Seattle. The tub is clogged. He gets in the shower. Then he's done with the shower. Then I get in the shower. I'm standing in the water up to my knee. And he says, be careful. I whacked off in there. Meanwhile, so there's icebergs floating around in that.
1:31:36🔗
Adam
Oh, my God. Is that K-Rock cheap? Oh, my God. Tower Air. Tower Air. You take a bus to the plane. Oh, my God. Okay. I could do 20. I could do an hour on that.
1:32:10🔗
Drew
It's done. I've heard of it being done. It's not terribly common and it's pretty safe.
1:32:15🔗
Adam
I have heard of it being done and more and more. There's all sorts of reconstructive stuff going on down there. And if it really, really, really bothers you, maybe you should look into it. But I don't think guys care so much.
1:32:52🔗
Adam
Here is Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew over there, and that is the show. Again, Caratop coming in here tomorrow night, and then Insane Clown Posse is coming in the next night. I want to thank Alison Byrne Field for coming in here from Rock the Vote. What can the people do? Can they log on to some kind of Rock the Vote, WWW thing or something?
1:33:14🔗
Caller
Yeah, it's too late to register to vote, but those folks who are registered and they're not going to be in town to vote, a lot of this is applicable to a lot of college students. Perhaps they can still apply for an absentee ballot on our website.
1:33:24🔗
Adam
Well, I'm sorry, I was going to say we are in probably a lot of cities where states where you still could register to vote.
1:33:32🔗
Caller
Most states the deadlines have passed, but they can check out, you can register to vote on our website, you can apply for an absentee ballot, you should check it out at www.rockthevote.org or.com.
1:33:42🔗
Adam
Yeah, I don't want to give you any problems, but weren't you saying there was a handful of states or cities...
1:33:46🔗
Caller
Yeah, a handful of states. North Dakota, you don't have to register. Wisconsin, Wyoming, Minnesota and New Hampshire, you can do same day registration.
1:33:57🔗
Adam
Alright, well, another four years everybody. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. Ay! Ay!
1:34:06🔗
Caller
This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is the presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.