2:55🔗DrewYeah. So, Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla. This is Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-V-E-1-9-1, facts number 310-854-4455. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist.
3:14🔗DrewI'll tell you, it's important everybody, everybody, you all have your own pathology, meaning, there's something that flips your cookie in life. Maybe you're an exhibitionist, you should be a stripper. Because if you're not an exhibitionist, if your dad didn't F with you, if your uncle didn't F with you, if you didn't get enough attention from this guy or that guy.
3:40🔗DrewMiserable, I mean, just think about a woman who comes from a very sound, loving environment where she respects and reveres her parents getting up on stage night after night and taking her clothes off. Painful, right? Yeah, that's my problem.
3:55🔗AdamThat's the situation you're in. He was taking up stripping, I didn't know.
3:59🔗DrewI'm not F'd up enough to like this business. I'm tired of it, I don't like it. I know everyone says, you're doing it, don't give me a break. I don't, I don't. I don't like being in front of the camera, I don't like talking to people. I want to get away from people, I want to go home, I want to be left alone, leave me alone. I'll do anything to be left alone, I really will.
4:19🔗AdamBut, I mean, you don't want to be out all together, you just need a pace, you need to be paced.
4:26🔗DrewRadio's different, because that's just me and you and a bunch of a-holes listening, who I don't really think are paying attention.
4:31🔗AdamIt's not like performing, it's like having a...
4:33🔗DrewNo, I don't, I just want to be left alone. I want to be left alone. I don't want to go any more parties, I don't want to talk any more kids, I don't want any, I want to be left alone. God, I miss being left alone. Oh, I never thought I'd get to that point in my life. I was at Lake Havasu this weekend for the entire weekend. I got on the goddamn bus the second The Man Show stopped taping and I got in two and a half hours ago and it was just nothing but frat guys just wanting to chug a beer and do a shot. I just want to be left alone and you know what? I'm an a-hole too. Listen to me, any of you who run into me on the street and want to come up and say hi, say hi, then leave.
5:21🔗AdamJust for like a couple of months, don't even say hi.
5:25🔗DrewBe careful. Listen, there's a few of you and I've run into you, where you come up to me and you go, hey, how's it going, buddy? And I go, yeah, good. And they go, hey, buddy, let me get you in a headlocker. And I go, hey, leave me alone. And they go, oh, hey, I'm a big fan of the show. Oh, hey, I like you. You're not so cool. You know what? That doesn't break my heart at all. I don't care. I'm done. You think I'm an a-hole? Good. Screw you. Don't watch. Don't listen. I don't care. I don't care. Geez, I'm going insane, Drew. I really am. I'm starting to lose it.
5:57🔗AdamI just wonder if you'd feel better if you had a little break, you know?
5:59🔗DrewYeah, a little break, yeah. Like six months or something. I'm just done. I'm done talking to people. I'm done. Justin, you're on line six. What's up?
6:10🔗My girlfriend, me and my girlfriend were having sex this morning and the condom broke and I was wondering where to get the morning after pill, how much it costs.
6:35🔗DrewYeah, as far as I know. They're in a big fishbowl right at the counter. You just reach in and grab a handful.
6:39🔗AdamYou know, it's interesting, we, drew.com, advertised a bunch on Felicity last week and during that, that was a show about the morning after pill. It opens up with Felicity, I guess, working in like a family planning clinic and a girl comes in and condom broke. Where can I get the morning after pill? The whole episode was about the morning after.
6:55🔗DrewWell, Felicity never gets nailed herself.
6:58🔗DrewYeah. I don't know what that is in TV. Whenever somebody, whenever they delve into the tough subjects, it's never the person that's the star of the show, which you'd think about if you want a vehicle to delve into the tough subjects, drugs or addiction or abortion or whatever the hell it is, why not just make the goddamn guys the star of the show have it? No, it's a guy you know as a friend of his because he's perfect. All right, Justin, so watch Felicity.
7:34🔗AdamI think it's about $30 in that range. And again, Planned Parenthood may be able to prorate that for you, but any doctor can get it in the emergency room. If you're in the state of Washington, you can get it without a prescription from a pharmacist. So just take advantage of this. It's something that will hopefully avoid a lot of unwanted pregnancies and abortions.
7:51🔗DrewWell, how's the without a prescription work when you go into Planned Parenthood and you're not in the state of Washington?
7:57🔗AdamYou see somebody and they give you a prescription.
9:23🔗AdamHe's not suggesting you should, but just give it some time. Keep... I want to just say keep whacking away, but now you take off on that. Right. Keep slugging away, putting yourself out there, taking chances, and slowly you'll gain some skill with these things.
9:42🔗DrewYeah, everyone is scared assless of women and rejection and dates. Engineer Anderson does a lot of distracting hand gestures, which would be okay for many professions, except for engineer, because I catch him out of the corner of my eye, and he's whipping his hand around like in a lasso motion, or he's going side to side with his hands, and I'm looking at him, and I'm thinking, that must mean he wants me to do something, except for it doesn't mean he wants me to do anything.
10:14🔗AdamHe's got to remember that. He has such bad ADD. Yeah, right. He has to remember he's not just an engineer, he's your engineer. And I just happened to see what he was doing, too. He was rubbing his eyes.
10:29🔗DrewIt's meant to distract and annoy. That's what that is.
10:33🔗AdamBut you know what's nice, Adam, we actually have a little conspiracy going here. I'll do stuff like this and I'll do this.
10:39🔗DrewOkay, let me explain with you though, Drew. You, when you do your incessant doodling with your marks a lot on your notepad, you can hear it over the mic.
10:50🔗AdamNo, I know that, but I've been doing this a lot.
10:51🔗DrewI don't mind that. You thump and bang around. Anything I can't hear, I don't care. You can move around all you want. I have a seizure for all I care over there. Just don't make so much noise about it. Chris?
11:16🔗DrewI don't really know the difference, but I'll go with it.
11:18🔗CallerOkay. I have a question. I had sex last night, and I was using a condom, but the condom was rather large, and it lasted only one minute. And after about a minute, I ejaculated inside of her, but the condom had slipped about a third of the way down my penis. Right. And I ejaculated, and then I pulled out, and I didn't see, well, at least I don't think I saw any sperm hanging out, or hanging around at the base of the penis, where...
12:10🔗AdamAnd when it comes off is when it spills its contents, so you're all right, probably.
12:14🔗DrewYeah. And hey, Drew, what about this? I'll maybe be hard to put on, but I'm sure the way the condoms are designed, they have a little bit of a sort of a snap ring at the end to sort of grab on. The very...
12:28🔗DrewYeah. And I know there's that stuff for... There's that device that helps you achieve erection where you pump up your penis and then you snap that ring on and it keeps the blood in your penis.
12:58🔗DrewOh, okay, wait a minute, better. Instead of... Because see, the problem with my idea is it'd be a little hard to get on because you'd have that thicker ring. If everyone knows what I'm talking about...
13:16🔗DrewNo, I'm talking about... What about this? What about a device that is a lot like that one that I was just speaking of that you use with the vacuum device, where you pull the condom all the way over your penis, get a good erection, and then snap a little ring, like a garter at the very end. Keeps the erection longer and keeps the condom from sliding off.
13:38🔗AdamInteresting idea. Why not a cinching action?
13:42🔗DrewWhat are you going to make? What is it going to do, catgut or something? What are you going to do with that cinching?
13:46🔗AdamI'm not thinking in terms of how you actually pull it off.
13:48🔗DrewIt's not going to work. You end up tying your balls in a knot underneath the thing with a sheep shank.
13:54🔗AdamNothing. How about, I was just thinking, like NFL wide receivers use on their hands.
14:00🔗DrewYeah. No. Like a little pine tar on the end of your nuts?
14:04🔗AdamIt was on the end of the condom or something. He rolled it down.
14:06🔗DrewYeah, but it's going to end up getting stuck on your penis on the way up. I say you take the condom, you make the end just a little bit looser so it slides right on the penis, no problem, and then pop snap ring.
14:44🔗DrewI don't know when you're making fun of me.
14:45🔗AdamNo, no, I'm not making fun of you. It's a funny concept, but I think it has some merit.
14:50🔗DrewWell, I don't know if the condom loader is going to sell, but the little snap ring, and you'll keep an erection longer with that snap ring on there too. John?
15:07🔗AdamWe'll just, let's hang on and see if they're...
15:10🔗DrewYeah, oh, he hung up. Son of a bitch. I don't know if people look at that as an insult or not. To me, that's just flat out entertainment. I wish every other call was a toilet flashing. Alicia?
15:27🔗GuestYeah, I just met my dad. Six months ago. And now he wants me to move in with him. And it just, it kind of freaked me out because when I met him, he had just gotten out of prison.
17:37🔗DrewStick with your grandma. Take it slow with your dad. I wouldn't move in with him. You don't owe him anything. Don't let him guilt you into that. And all of that, all that, hey, you're my blood. Nonsense. Nonsense.
17:55🔗AdamYou've heard how Adam talks about his blood, his blood relatives.
17:59🔗DrewYeah, screw him. Listen, if I went and banged a hooker in Nevada, the condom broke, and then I went back to LA and 16 years later, there was a kid, you know what I mean? What kind of relationship would we have? Oh, what would that kid think of me? I mean, that's blood. And I don't know where everyone gets that. It's not that big a deal. It's way, you got to, way overrated. You got to earn your right to be a parent.
18:32🔗AdamWell, that's why you and I have issues about these adopted kids suddenly sort of forsaking their adopted parents who've raised them and loved them for 18 years.
18:39🔗DrewYeah. I got to go find a real junky mom.
18:43🔗DrewLet me just check the project or the flop house or the crack house. Let's see if I can scrape her off the bad rust-colored shag, tell her I love her.
18:57🔗DrewAnd you ain't going to fix it by finding that old hag or that a-hole who's in the can for 16 years, the junky a-hole who's in there for attempted murder.
19:06🔗AdamIt's never the idealized individual that you've conjured up in your mind.
19:20🔗DrewCharles. What's up, man? You're 19. What do you want?
19:24🔗CallerAll right. Basically, I've been going out with a girl for about a year, and I had a blind date last night, and we ended up having sex at the end of the night. The girl I had sex with is 17. My girlfriend is 16.
19:38🔗CallerI'm afraid this girl I had sex with was going to go run to mom, because, you know, it was just a one night thing, right?
19:45🔗DrewWell, wait a minute. Why are you having blind dates when you have a girlfriend?
19:52🔗CallerI don't know, man. I wanted something new. Kind of spur of the moment thing.
19:56🔗DrewWell, hold on a second. I understand you cheating on your girlfriend, and maybe you're out at some dance club, and you run into some chick who's drunk.
20:05🔗DrewA blind date means that you guys are set up through a mutual friend? Well, I mean, like I said, it's kind of weird to be set up on a date when you have a girlfriend. Okay.
20:25🔗DrewI don't suspect. Did you rape her? No. No. That's a nice change of pace for Charles.
20:30🔗AdamI'm doing a thing for MTV on Tuesday, in fact, about underage date, older guys and younger girls, and this movie Gel Bait they're putting out.
20:39🔗AdamYeah. I'm helping them sort of create some content for it, and it's exactly about this situation, where basically the guy who just turned 18 and pregates a girl that's still 15, and he's got problems. If it's more than three years and he's over 18, then it is a serious problem.
21:15🔗AdamBut the point is, look, first of all, he's got to leave his present girlfriend. That relationship is pathetic. And that one has some issues about too. He's 19, she's 16. I'm 17. This one's 16, 19. He's dating.
21:27🔗DrewAll right. He's an idiot. There's no doubt about that. Full scale. I don't think he's going to tell her parents. She went out on a date with a guy and had sex with him. What's she going to brag to them about?
21:56🔗DrewOn the holiest of days. On my people's Sabbath.
22:00🔗CallerYeah. And well, I had a cold sore in my mouth. I noticed it afterwards. I know that she doesn't have anything, but I want to know if I can give anything to her from that.
22:09🔗AdamYeah, you could give her herpes. Sure. Oh, s***.
22:13🔗DrewTry not to use the S word, Justin. You have a cold sore on your mouth?
22:30🔗DrewYou're 15. I never got closer than nine feet from a vagina at 15. I couldn't imagine having my face stuffed in one. You hear that laugh? Yeah. Count Dracula. Poor's Carla.
22:48🔗DrewAll right, Justin. All right. Listen, I don't know where you go. You see, on one hand, I'm envious of you, on the other hand, I feel sorry for you. You're 15. You're going down on chicks. Where do you go from there? Where do you go? Do you know what I mean? Are you getting oral sex from her?
23:07🔗DrewOh, son of a bitch. Son of a bitch. All right, Justin. All right. Yeah. Enjoy it.
23:14🔗AdamMaybe, there could be a flip side of this. Maybe if you were engaged in that behavior when you were 14, 15, 16, when it became the Holy Grail, you wouldn't continue to have such an etched-in preoccupation. You know what I mean? It could have become like, oh, well, now I'm on to something else.
23:29🔗DrewMm-hmm. Yeah, that's interesting. I'm with you. I believe it's that way with everyone. I was talking to someone, and we've talked about this a few times, how my mom with her health food, not crap, turned me into a madman with the food. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it backfires. Yeah. You deny your kids something and they want it that much more.
23:49🔗AdamI wonder if this is where all the anal sex stuff is coming from, that they're just up in the ante, up in the ante. They're all used to this at 15. By the time they're 23, it's now what?
24:03🔗DrewWell, Drew, I've said it a thousand times. I mean, when you're 13 years old, you have full access to the internet. You're watching double penetrations and gang bangs and this kind of thing at 13. Then you're 15. You're getting a hummer from your girlfriend every weekend. You're going down on her. Now, you're 17 and a half, 18. Where do you go? I mean, it's time for cornhole, which is going to be the name of a Saturday morning show I'm working at. It's time for cornhole and everyone get on hold. Yeah. Like a guy with a banjo. I'm going to work the beats out on this during the commercial.
25:10🔗DrewAll right. We'll take ourselves a little break, and we'll be back after this. Thanks for the offering, Anderson. Phone number for Loveline, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-44-55. Yeah, it's Dr. Drew over there. I'm Adam Carolla over here. We're just speaking during the break about missing our native professions.
26:08🔗AdamYeah, it's like we're getting so involved in this stuff that we have to be careful to protect what we really are.
26:14🔗DrewYes, a carpenter and you're my lady. Oh, I mean physician, that's right. Chris, you're 15.
26:33🔗DrewLet me say this. I've said it a few times on this show, but lads, if you put on some of those 501 Levi's, especially the new hard ones, thick denim ones, and you put a nice pair of underpants on, the erection is not going to be a big problem.
26:52🔗AdamUnless they have some extraordinary anatomic problem.
27:19🔗DrewYeah. I suggest all guys do. I don't know where you get this boxer thing. Here's the problem with the boxer. Penis comes right out of the fly. I've tried to wear boxers on a...
27:31🔗DrewOn a couple of occasions. I've attempted to wear boxers a few times. The fly hangs open on boxers, or at least any boxer I've ever put on.
27:40🔗AdamYeah, but most guys, the penis hangs down below that. You see?
27:44🔗DrewBelow the... You gotta hike them up a little. If the thing gets down, I know you're trying to weave a subtle insult to this, but let me tell you something. I've said it a hundred times. I have a fine gym... My penis looks good at the gym. When it's hanging, it's fine.
27:58🔗AdamIs that the new sitcom you're working on?
28:10🔗DrewPlays by his own rules. No, my penis hangs fine, but it will come out, especially if you get any kind of wood down there at all, it will pop right out of that fly. And the next thing about boxers is they're up the ass in a matter of moments, and one leg is coming up higher in the other, and then the backside is hanging out. It's way too high a price to pay for cool. I can't imagine them being more comfortable. My feeling with boxers is why bother with the underpants? Yeah. If you're going to wear, to me wearing boxers is like wearing a pair of shorts under your pants, and why bother? Just don't wear. Just free ball. Don't wear anything underneath there. Now, you want to know what a nice alternative is? Midways. You ever see those midways? No. Midway is, it's a boxer. It's as long as a boxer, but it's tight, like a brief.
29:01🔗AdamThat's what I wear. You gave me grief for that.
29:43🔗CallerWell, here's the situation. I've been on Zoloft for depression. Life was pretty good. So I started working out a lot to lose some weight so I could go skydiving. The thing is, the more exercise I did-
29:56🔗AdamI was chatting with Scotty the other day.
29:57🔗CallerYeah, and I forgot to pull the speed brakes. Whoops. But it's just like the more exercise I do or the better shape I get in, the darker everything gets. And that's what concerned me.
30:10🔗AdamI wonder if that's a function of what the weight has meant to you, what you've used that for, whether you've sort of kept people away or-
30:20🔗AdamBut I mean, maybe it has more of a symbolic meaning for you and now that you're changing and you're actually becoming a different person quite literally physically, it's triggering some feelings you weren't prepared for.
30:30🔗CallerOh, it's possible, but it's excellent. I'm sabotaging myself now at every step.
31:08🔗DrewNot a lot of tears in the long goodbyes. They got me off that plane. I said, good. I got right back in a car and I drove right home. I couldn't, but everyone thought that I did it on purpose.
31:20🔗AdamNo, no, everyone thought you didn't try hard enough to get up there. They realized exactly that. That as soon as you realized there was a slight barrier, you would go, sorry, I can't make it.
31:29🔗DrewWell, listen, everybody, it is true that I don't want to do anything. I'll be straight up with you. I mean, if the power went out right now at this radio station, I'd jump up, click my heels again, I'd be in my car in 10 seconds and be driving home laughing like a hyena. I really don't like to do stuff, but I do not like to be accused of being unprofessional or of ducking things. I show up.
31:56🔗DrewThe plane was delayed, I got off the plane, I went to the thing, I said, are there any more flights going to this area and any possible this time? Nope, nope, and nope. And then...
32:22🔗AdamA few ways. Why? What's happening there?
32:25🔗CallerWell, my boyfriend occasionally has an orgasm without ejaculation, and in fact, it wasn't until me that he would really have orgasm at all. That's interesting.
32:39🔗AdamYou mean he couldn't have one at all with anybody?
32:42🔗CallerHe had very few in his life with females.
32:50🔗AdamIs that because he'd been with very few females or because-
32:52🔗CallerWell, that and his dad's pretty abusive, and so he thinks that it probably had a lot to do with control and not being able to relax. Yeah. So we have a really great relationship except that I just really didn't know. I mean, it's kind of hard to-
33:10🔗AdamI can see multiple possibilities here. One is that he's not really having an orgasm but sort of faking.
34:04🔗DrewThere you go. Bye. Listen, I wish nothing came out of me when I had an orgasm.
34:08🔗AdamWell, you almost get to that point, don't you?
34:10🔗DrewYeah, but it's really only on number 13 or 14. It's still powder. It's a tough push. But yeah, I really, it's like the smokeless ashtray. You know what I mean? It's, hey, no mess. I like that. That'd be great. Fantastic. Brian, I could let someone do my laundry, by the way. Let me tell you, I don't want to get, well, okay, I'll get a little bit candid here. I got a maid comes to my house on Mondays. I, as I was complaining to you off the air, Drew, have been home so little over the last couple of months, especially over the last couple of weeks, I have no more clean clothes, socks, underwear, all gone. And I have piled. I got a lot of underwear and a lot of socks. And I went through all of them. I haven't done laundry in weeks. And I just don't have a couple hours to dedicate the laundry. And people keep volunteering. Yeah, yeah, I'll do the laundry. I'll swing by and help you out. My maid is like, yeah, let me do the laundry. My laundry is such a mess. I mean, it is so embarrassing. It's so humiliating.
35:16🔗AdamIs it because you've been spraying all over it?
35:19🔗DrewI use that laundry like a mop slash squeegee. I mean, it's a disaster, that stuff.
35:30🔗DrewAnd not only for the semen, just for anything that comes out of me. I'll wipe my ass, I'll blow my nose into that thing. I mean, it is a disaster.
35:40🔗DrewIt is, you know, it's like medical waste.
35:42🔗AdamDoes it all stick together? It's like a block, blocko clothes.
35:45🔗DrewIt's hard to get stuff apart. You have to like break stuff off. I have a few pairs of black underpants that just, it just looked like an Easter egg. Just a mess. And there's like hash marks everywhere. I mean, I mean, there could be blood places, you know, if I, if I'm like shaving and I nick myself and I'm bleeding, I'll grab a sock out of the hamper and, you know, blot myself. It is not a pretty...
36:27🔗DrewYeah. Yeah, the hazmat team will bring it bring it into the lab. But my point is, is I will not let anyone do it because I fear for them and I, you know, I fear for my dignity, what little I have left. So I won't let anyone do it yet. I'm never home, so I never do it. So it's a disaster. I'm wearing the same pair underpants for last week and a half.
36:51🔗AdamThus, we are back to the what do you call those kinds of underwear?
36:59🔗AdamYeah. Three o'clock Pacific Time. We're doing a streaming video at drdrew.com. It's about the movie Black and White. He's cruising around with the director.
37:07🔗DrewOh, I see. That's going to be interesting. What time is that?
37:10🔗AdamThree o'clock Pacific Time at drdrew.com on the streaming video, the drdrew.com show.
37:16🔗DrewInteresting. Yeah. Make a note of that. I think we'll check that out in the office.
37:34🔗AdamYeah. Remember when dextromethorphan was a big deal? Like, has dextromethorphan in the cough syrup? Yeah. Now, they don't want anybody to know that because kids abuse it like hell. And it causes hallucinations. I have not seen any long-term effects from it. And, however, have I seen somebody using that primarily as their drug? So, it's hard to tell what's going on. Because it's usually with POT, with LSD, with other things.
38:56🔗AdamAgain, I worry that it might. I don't know evidence that it does. It seems to be a sort of a... I'd have to study it more for sure, because I understand it's more of a delirium as a side effect, rather than a primary effect to hallucinogenic, which is those that cause the serotonin disruption.
39:10🔗DrewWell listen, there's no free rides, or free lunches, as my partner would say. If you're getting effed up off it, it's effing you up. I don't know if it's effing you up as bad as other things, but I mean that's really what people are looking for in a drug, isn't it Drew? Yeah. Here's the scale. How badly can I get effed up, as opposed to how badly is this effing me up? And some don't have a good ratio, others might have a better ratio, like mushrooms. I can get really, really effed up on mushrooms, as far as we know, they're not really effing me up.
39:47🔗DrewYeah, that's the key, whereas ecstasy may be a little worse ratio there. All right, we're going to take a break. When we come back, we'll speak to Cindy, who's 17, thinks she's a boy trapped in a girl's body. We never get this one.
41:02🔗DrewSo let me make a note of that. I'm going to make myself a little nervous.
41:05🔗AdamHere's one for me. What's the probability of getting alcoholism if my dad is an alcoholic? It's about 50 percent, about half the kids get the gene, half don't, but the fact that you inherit the gene doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to get the disease.
41:17🔗DrewYeah. It could manifest itself in a different way.
41:57🔗CallerI guess I hang out with guys, like a lot of guys only. I don't really have that many girlfriends. And the reason why I think I hang out with a lot of guys is because I have no father figure. I have no idea.
42:37🔗AdamAnd it's the work and the stress and everything.
42:39🔗DrewWell, look at it this way. I mean, I really look at the human bodies like an automobile. You drive it hard. You just drive it to the ground. You just stress it, burn it. You drive it.
42:51🔗AdamPeople don't do it. We had dinner on Saturday night. My wife and I were with another triplet parent couple. And boy, the moms just get their souls sucked right out of them.
43:00🔗AdamYeah. And kids do that to moms. You see, you don't really take that kind of stress into account. I mean, why doesn't that cause them to die younger? Because it's insane the way kids just drain the life right out of moms.
43:10🔗DrewYeah, they kill you, those kids. Yeah, they're devils, devil children. Thank God my parents had already been depleted of their life force before I was born. My parents were smart. They're like, I'll be goddamned if these kids are going to suck the life out of us. I'll tell you what, let's lose our will to live now and then we'll have kids and there'll be nothing. We'll be barren. There'll be no spark, no glimmer, no life in it. Either one of us, there'll be nothing to suck dry. Ingenious. All right, Cindy, I don't know what Cindy's prom is.
43:43🔗AdamCindy sounds fine. Cindy is 17. She's helix hand-around guys because she's never had an intimate relationship with a guy.
44:19🔗AdamBut as long as you guys continue in this behavior, it means you will get pregnant. Okay. He produces sperm. You guys aren't using protection. A lot of that comes out before he ejaculates. You will get pregnant.
44:31🔗DrewHave fun with the kids. And listen, don't come to me for a goddamn penny to raise those little mongrels either. You hear me? You're on your own.
44:39🔗AdamUse a condom, take a pill, do something appropriate.
48:19🔗AdamThat's an area that you can cause, that already gets a lot of pathology. Carbuncles and fistulas and hemorrhoids and things. You can sort of stimulate that to occur.
48:28🔗CallerAll right. So I probably shouldn't make a habit of it then.
48:35🔗DrewAll right. You work on them. Otherwise, you pack your penis with dookie. All right. All right. There you go. I will take a little break. You want to talk to George off the air? Yeah.
49:32🔗DrewHere's Loveline and Adam Corolla as Dr. Drew. We're going to take a quick 10 second timeout. We'll be back with more of the show in just 10 seconds.
49:55🔗DrewIt's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. And let's hop back on the phones. I gotta take this one, Drew. I know you didn't pick this, but look at this. Jason?
50:29🔗CallerOkay. My girlfriend told me that she can't have babies because apparently when she was 14 years of age, she had sex with this guy whose penis was too big for her. And I guess it like damaged her cervix or something like that. And now she can't have babies because of it.
51:07🔗CallerBecause she told me that she can. Because we've been going out for a long time. And I would like to settle down and have a family and that. But she's telling me that she can't because of this problem.
51:44🔗AdamWe hear about little kids all the time getting this and that. But what she could have gotten is an infection. He could have delivered God knows what into her and that can affect fertility for sure but has nothing to do with size of the penis.
52:14🔗CallerDo you think that she might have something? She couldn't have any kind of sexual disease. Otherwise, I would have it and I would know about it.
52:20🔗AdamWell, no. She may have had something that scarred her tubes. Something like that.
52:25🔗DrewOh, man. I remember when my tubes first got scarred.
52:30🔗DrewHey, listen ladies. Don't tell your current boyfriends about your ex-boyfriend's huge penis doing damage to you. That is just that. That's got to be the worst goddamn story. They would really. I'll tell you. I'll tell you. Here's the let me let me give you a male's reaction to two stories. When I was 13, I was in camp. I killed six other campers and buried them underneath the the cottage. We all stayed at.
53:18🔗DrewOh, that tell me that may be a deal breaker. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The other part I was willing. I mean, that was a good four years ago. I could get over that, but not this.
53:36🔗CallerMy boyfriend and me have been going out for a year. I've known him for four years and everything. When we have sex, sometimes it hurts really, really bad. I can't orgasm at all. Yeah.
54:20🔗CallerYeah, we'll lube it up or whatever, but it still hurts a lot.
54:24🔗AdamDo you, is it with deep penetration you have a problem? What? Is it sort of a deep penetration that you have pain or just all the time?
54:31🔗CallerLike sometimes, not all the time, but like when we first start, it'll hurt a lot, and then it won't, and then it will, and like I'll have to stop.
54:39🔗DrewI see. Hey, Melissa? With the deep penetration, is there more pain?
54:47🔗DrewOkay. Did they ever get the feeling our callers have their answer predetermined before you ask your question, and that was the answer you were going to get regardless of what your question was?
54:58🔗AdamYeah. Okay. And is there no history of a tip uterus, pelvic infections, anything like that?
55:20🔗DrewWell, I just wonder if she's tightening up a little bit of her pants or something.
55:23🔗AdamUsually that's right at penetration and not so much the deep penetration during sex. But listen, a pelvic ultrasound I would think would be appropriate. I'm going to go a little further with this. Yeah.
55:32🔗DrewYeah. I may grab one of those tomorrow too. Trisha?
55:38🔗CallerYeah. Basically, my problem is, well, I don't want to get pregnant right now, but the problem is that we do the rhythm method and then we also do withdrawal. We never use condoms since the day that we got together.
55:54🔗CallerWithdrawal. And I'm married, right? We're married. We've been married for a year and two months and we've been sexually active for like two, two years. And I have not gotten pregnant and that's the weirdest thing.
56:06🔗DrewWell, how, how exact is your rhythm method?
58:03🔗AdamWithin a day, within 24 hours, you're in.
58:07🔗DrewOkay. Hey, Patricia, when you have a child and you put them in the car seat, then you put the car seat up on the roof of the car to clear out some space in the back seat.
58:23🔗DrewOkay. Kids, I give the kid 13 to 28 months before she, you know, suffocates him, mistakenly somehow. He rolls over on him while she's asleep, drives a quarter mile with him on the roof of the car before he falls off and gets hit by a street sweeper.
58:53🔗DrewShe's going to, like, put the diaper on his head instead of his ass and suffocate the kid. Something's going to happen. Okay. All right. Well, that's just Darwinism right there. John?
59:10🔗CallerAll right. Well, the question I got is that, like, me and my girlfriend, we make out a lot, you know, just kind of give it into it. We never, like, have gone all the way to have sex or anything, but we've been done some heavy make out session and.
59:37🔗CallerAnd so basically, the question was that we make out and she has an orgasm very quickly. Like, I just barely, you know, like after, you know, five, ten minutes of heavy making out, she, she, you know, has orgasms really quick. And I was wondering if that's normal at all, or if that's like, you know, something to look forward to.
59:55🔗DrewYeah, that's good. It's good for you too, John. Makes you feel like a man. For me, it's like cracking a goddamn safe every time with a woman. It really is. Sweat coming off the brow. Got that music in the background. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. What?
1:01:08🔗DrewOkay. There's a certain percentage of women that really react to a little friction down there, just sort of the right, get a little right rhythm going with the friction. As a matter of fact, I think, what do you think of this, Drew? I think a lot of women, more than let's say pants off, direct, let's say clitoral stimulation, react even better to sort of pants on, sort of rhythmic rub. Like a cat on one of those scratching poles. You know where they can sort of, it's like, it's not overly stimulating, it's not overwhelming, they can kind of create their own pace with it a little bit. Yeah, nothing wrong with that. Antonio?
1:02:01🔗CallerCheck it out. My grandfather, he drank a lot and he went crazy. He had delirium tremens or something like that. That's from my mom's side of the family. On my dad's side, my aunt became all into God and she became a Jehovah's Witness. She left her, she was pretty well off and everything. She left her family, her husband, everything. Used to go to the hills and talk to people about God or whatever. Now, my problem is this. I was atheist before. I used to not believe in God and whatever. But one day I woke up and I'm just so much into God now. It's not even funny and I am worried because whenever I talk about God, people get like this, this guy's going cuckoo plus I always felt that at some point in my life, I'm going to get incarcerated in a loony place.
1:04:07🔗AdamYou only have to do it three times a week to get addicted at this point. You will not sleep for a long time to come, as a matter of fact.
1:04:14🔗CallerWhat about before that? When I was a kid, I couldn't sleep and I was terrified of aliens. I don't know why. I remember like trying many times to my parents, you know, just like trying to get me to sleep and ever since.
1:04:27🔗DrewThe aliens or the aliens or the Chupacabra?
1:05:00🔗DrewYou know what I just thought about? You know how like I know we've gotten into this before, but like you're from Germany, you're German and you're from Sweden, you're Swedish, Japan, you're Japanese, but if you're Mexico, you're not Mexican. It's considered like insulting to call a guy Mexican.
1:05:29🔗AdamWell, if they're Americans, you don't call them Mexicans. That's the thing. No, but if you're from Mexico, they're Mexican.
1:05:34🔗DrewNo, you still got to call them something else. If they come over here.
1:05:37🔗AdamI guess you don't say French Americans.
1:05:39🔗DrewNo, you don't say French. You can't say Mexican. Now, here's why you can't say Mexican. Mexico's a dump. That's what they don't tell you. Because you can call a guy from Germany a German. You call a guy from France a French. But you can't call them Mexican Mexican.
1:05:53🔗AdamYou've been down there lately. You stayed at that nice mansion in Puerto Vallarta.
1:05:57🔗DrewYeah, that was nice. Yeah. You got enough money to throw around. But listen, I mean, come on, that place is, you know, they're trying to they're trying to enact the daylight savings over there and half the people aren't buying it. They think it's a government plot. I mean, come on, please. Andy?
1:06:26🔗CallerNo, about every every Sunday night, like before I go back to school, I can't get to sleep and I have anxiety attacks and everything. I've been diagnosed with mild anxiety and I have panic attacks and everything.
1:06:39🔗CallerAnd I just can't get to sleep and I'm like really anxious. And sometimes whenever I have a panic attack, it usually occurs on a Sunday night. And I want to know if like Valium or anything could help that. I mean, I've been put on depakone effector for bipolar depression and everything.
1:06:56🔗AdamAnd are you on effector now? Yes. Could that be causing your panic attacks? I mean, effector can cause panic. Maybe it's just the effector.
1:07:06🔗CallerNo, it happened before I was on it. And it's been about the same. And I thought that like one of the other could decrease them.
1:07:12🔗AdamWhy don't they use something that specifically works on panic like Paxil?
1:07:18🔗CallerI don't know. He thought that the other drugs would do it for me.
1:07:22🔗AdamWhy don't you go back and work on it? Because if you're on medication anyway for bipolar, they should be able to find a combination that's appropriate that will also control panic. But I'll tell you what, Sunday night is a typical time for people to get depressed.
1:07:34🔗DrewI used to get depressed every Sunday night.
1:07:37🔗DrewEvery time. I always hated school. I never did my homework. It was always time to pay the fiddler Monday morning when I showed up empty handed. That was A number one. And then that spilled right on into construction, which I hated with an equal passion. And the notion of getting up Monday morning for a good long hot day of no pain, some hole somewhere was equally depressing. I must have had, I don't have it anymore. I haven't had it for like four or five years, the Sunday night depression, because I've been doing what I want to do.
1:08:33🔗DrewYeah, it was 20-something years of just sheer pain on a Sunday night. Vanessa? Yeah. Plus, they used to run that god-awful, Mutual of Omaha Wild Kingdom Sunday night, too, which was painful to watch.
1:08:46🔗DrewMarlon Perkins. Up in some tree somewhere, looking at a giraffe. Vanessa? Yeah. Yeah, Disney and Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom. You're 19. What's up?
1:08:59🔗CallerWell, I noticed that I'm like two months pregnant, and I want to know if I can have an abortion. Is it too late to have an abortion?
1:09:06🔗DrewIt's never too late to have an abortion.
1:09:28🔗DrewAll right. Don't worry, then. Child wasn't going to be president. Don't you worry about it. You know, what are the odds? You know what I'm saying? Listen, I was out at Lake Havasu this weekend. We could do with a lot less people. We really could. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Elaine, you're 22. What's up?
1:09:51🔗GuestMy boyfriend just relapsed on coke yesterday. He had been sober for two and a half years. We're living together and we've been together for over a year. And I just don't know what to do. I don't know if he's going to keep using. Should I leave him?
1:10:09🔗DrewAll right. We got to take a little break. But don't worry. Is he out of the house? Is he back?
1:10:15🔗GuestWell, he's at work right now. We're still together, like in the house together.
1:10:18🔗DrewOkay. As far as you know. Yeah. Hold on a second, Elaine. We'll take a break. We'll tell you what to do with the boyfriend who's relapsed on the coke after this.
1:10:29🔗CallerYo, Loveline will be right back, homie.
1:11:12🔗DrewLoveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew. When we left off, we were speaking to Elaine, his 22, boyfriend was sober for, I think, two and a half years, and now he just went off with the coke. Elaine, how'd you find out he went off?
1:11:47🔗GuestBecause I think he has, I mean, he was sober for two and a half years. He was clean for two and a half years, and he wanted to. And part of what is so, I don't understand, is that his drug was really speed. He used to.
1:12:04🔗GuestYeah. Well, he used to inject speed. And so.
1:12:08🔗AdamHow was his recovery going before he relapsed? Was he going to meetings regularly? Did he have contact? Okay. All right. So he was already.
1:12:14🔗DrewI still want to know why he told you, did he show, was he missing for a day?
1:12:21🔗GuestHe's normally home at this time, actually, which is making me really nervous. I didn't realize how late it was. Yeah, he usually comes home about 1130 or 12.
1:12:31🔗GuestNo. Well, like I said, he usually comes home at this time, and he didn't even like come home until like four. So was he missing a whole day? No.
1:12:39🔗DrewNo. But the point is, is he came home at four and told you, here's what happened because he came home at four. He didn't come home at the usual time. And volunteer it to you.
1:12:50🔗DrewJust making sure I still know human nature.
1:12:52🔗AdamThe drug uses well down the sort of equation on a relapse. The fact that he wasn't going to a meeting is sort of getting back in his old patterns. That was the relapse already. The drug use is just sort of the final straw and all that. You must go to Al-Anon. He must go to program. This ain't going to work otherwise.
1:13:11🔗AdamYeah. You can't control him. You can't nag and you can't do anything. You can go to Al-Anon. And you can leave. And they clear you're going to leave if he doesn't do something with his end of the bargain.
1:13:20🔗DrewListen everybody, consequences. Let me tell you something real fast. Consequences? Huge.
1:13:32🔗DrewRemember, we had the world's worst picture of us floating around for many, many years, many years and I begged your publicist and I begged Stone Stanley, the producers of the TV show and I begged our management, Howard Lapita, for years to do something about it. And all those folks were so, well, I don't want to use the word impotent, but obviously they had no interest in doing things they weren't getting a percentage of or getting paid and no one did anything. And I yelled at everyone for years. And I mean, literally, a couple of years. They never would do anything, never anything, until one day when I'd been begging for them to get rid of the picture that we have on Talksoup, which is about five years old, the one that looks like a Drew's a retard and I'm some sort of a Macy's Day float. I finally saw that thing and I almost went nuts. And I said to everybody, here is the deal. Either that goddamn picture goes away or I don't come in to work. And if I see it again, I'm not coming in and that's it and I'm going somewhere and I'm not answering the phone. So if you don't see me, you'll know where I am and you'll know whose fault it is. I'm not going to tape talk soup and I'm not going to go out of my way to look for it. But if I spot it again, if I run across it, I will not show up for work and I'm not phoning anybody. I won't do it. And if you want to fire me, kiss my ass. I could care less. But I will, I swear to Christ, I will not be there. What happened? Magically, the next day or so it was taken care of, magically. And what happened here on Loveline? When we begged Westwood 2, the cheap bastards that they are, to provide a security guard for us. We begged them for years. They did nothing. Pay some idiot $7 an hour to fall asleep on the sofa out front for two hours a night. They couldn't pony that money up. Well, we got a bunch of death threats over at the TV show. And I said, listen, here's the deal. If I pull up to this dung heap you call a radio station, and I don't see a guy fallin asleep out front with a can of mace strapped to his leg, I will not get out of my car. I will continue driving. I will go home, and I will unplug the phone. And that will be that. So if you don't want to get a guard, fine. If you don't want to change the picture at TalkSoup, fine. But I'm going to keep driving. And magically, people do things. Unfortunately, it's unfortunate when you have to threaten people you work with to do their god damn job. But that's the nature of the beast, Drew. And that's how people work. And believe me, that's how it gets done. And it works the same with everything. Your boyfriend thinks you're leaving him, you're going to Allen On, you're not standing for his crap, you're kicking him out. It gets done.
1:16:27🔗AdamThe problem for codependents is they have to mean it, and they have to be willing to follow through on it.
1:16:30🔗DrewThat's right. That's right. The good news about me is I think people know I'm ready to follow through.
1:16:37🔗AdamYeah, they know you don't want to be here in the first place.
1:16:50🔗CallerSee, here's the thing. Me and my boyfriend, well, first of all, for the first time last weekend, I let him perform anal sex, but I was fine with that. That didn't seem so bad. But the second, I'm fine after that word, but when we went back to having, I guess, you would say regular intercourse, we used a condom, which we never do.
1:17:18🔗CallerNo, I wasn't saying, but I'm just emphasizing that we never do it. We did it for the first time last Saturday, I believe. The next morning, I was kind of sore, I guess, and we went back and like five minutes later, after we woke up, we were having sex again. And when he first went in, it was really sore. And after we were doing it, I was pretty all right. I could feel a little pain, but it didn't bother me that much. But then it was bleeding and the rest of the day, I could barely walk. It was just really sore and I was bleeding. It was just terrible. And I wouldn't know if this had any connection to the condom.
1:17:57🔗AdamWell, where was the bleeding coming from? As though the lips were so chapped that you actually bled? Or was the bleeding from inside?
1:18:32🔗DrewShe had anal sacs and then was it the next day you had the vaginal sacs?
1:18:37🔗CallerNo, we had them both in the same night.
1:18:39🔗DrewOh, the same night. And he put the condom on for the vaginal sacs, which he rarely uses.
1:18:45🔗AdamAnd then she seemed sore and to the point of maybe bleeding. Having bleeding during and after sex is not an uncommon thing. The uterus can be stimulated to bleed. And if somehow you became dry and there was a certain amount of friction, you can cause chafing to the point of some little bit of bleeding, I suppose.
1:19:00🔗DrewWell, listen, that whole area has been traumatized. I mean, it's just a war zone over there. You go with the anal, then you go with the vaginal, you're banging around. I mean, you know, all bets are off. There's been a lot of abuse going on down there. All right, let's speak to young Max.
1:19:55🔗AdamAgain, this kind of stuff is on my mind because I just watched the movie Jailbait today. Yeah. This stuff happens when people engage in those relationships. It's there to protect the young person, these laws. Yeah. You should pay attention to them. There's a reason for it. There's also a reason your friends don't like this, a reason we don't trust it.
1:20:41🔗DrewYeah. Well, listen. I've known my sister for quite some time and Drew, you've known your sister. I'd like to know Drew's sister a little better. The point is, is who cares that you've known her for a long time? I'm with Drew. It makes it worse. Yeah. What the hell? What do you mean you guys are great friends? You're 14. She's 10. What the hell are you talking about?
1:21:03🔗CallerWell, we knew each other since then.
1:21:20🔗DrewWell, there you go. There you go. Yeah. You got to go somewhere other than junior college.
1:21:26🔗AdamDo not prey upon the sort of vulnerable just because you can't maintain within your own peer bracket.
1:21:34🔗DrewNice, peer bracket. Let me explain something. There's a lot of guys out there who have a lot of difficulty with women. A lot of guys. Yeah. There's a lot of women that have a lot of difficulty with men, and when they do find that one guy or that one girl that's interested, hey, that's a big deal. For women, it's like, sure, the guy is a two-time loser and he's in the joint right now, but he loves me. I mean, he's writing me letters. He likes me. Or, sure, he's married and has a couple of kids, but he's showing me affection, he's showing me attention. I mean, when you don't get stuff, you miss it and you want it, and you ain't going to let stuff go just because the person's married, just because they're in jail, just because they're a few years younger than I am and there's a little jail bait situation.
1:22:25🔗DrewNo, but no, when you're desperate, I mean, look at it this way.
1:22:28🔗AdamBut you'll dream up excuses like that.
1:22:30🔗DrewWhy is it that the beautiful, intelligent women never date guys who are in prison? You know what I mean? Don't have to. Plenty of guys coming after them. You never look at it that way. People hate to look at love that way, because it's so pathetic. That look of, hey, this is the only person I could get. And maybe you'll learn to love them, but that is the only person you could get. Max is not scoring with every 19 and 20-year-old in his neighborhood. And he's got a 16-year-old who likes him. What's he gonna do? Throw that away? How often does someone like Max? You think he's gonna squander this one? Know what I'm saying? All right. Absolutely. All right, we're gonna take a little break. When we come back, we'll speak to Lisa. Anti-depressants make her unable to orgasm. No, come on. Who else do we want to talk to? Girlfriend wants to have sex, but he thinks it's a big deal. What? Smoke pot for a year, but stop? Friend got mad at him for sticking up for her when he was harassed at school.
1:23:38🔗AdamThis one I picked has the word orgasm in it.
1:23:40🔗DrewAll right. We'll take the orgasm call after this. Yep, this is the Loveline of Adam, that is Drew. Phone, I forget about the phone number. Hi, where were we here? Line 4, Drew? Lisa?
1:24:37🔗CallerYeah, and actually, I have to admit, my name is Leslie. I was nervous that somebody would recognize me, but that's really stupid, so my name's Leslie.
1:24:48🔗CallerWell, I've been on Selexa, an antidepressant, for about nine months. Yep. I went off of it for about two months ago and realized that it really changed my sex drive.
1:25:03🔗AdamThat whole class will big time, particularly for women, it just shuts you down completely.
1:25:07🔗CallerYeah, and it's unbelievable. When I wasn't on it, not only was I into sex so much more, but I masturbated more. In general, it's changed me 100 percent.
1:25:33🔗AdamThese are the serotonin reuptake inhibitors. They're the ones that do that. And Selexa is one of the ones that's the least likely to do it. It's sort of a weaker version of the Prozac, Paxos, and whatnot. You can switch to Serizone. You can switch to Remeron. But probably they should think about Serizone or Welbutrin for you as maybe an alternative to what you're taking. All right. You can talk to the doctor about that.
1:25:52🔗DrewI just looked down at my little note, Tim the Russian Rapper.
1:25:57🔗DrewI think it's high time I dig that one out. Oh, yeah.
1:26:00🔗AdamUsually you wrap with that. I mean, you wrap up with that wrap.
1:26:04🔗DrewOh, well, why make the kiddies wait? I want to say something, though. As I mentioned, I was in Lake Havasu, hanging out over the weekend doing a little man show bit. Yeah, good times. Ran into a lot of young, drunken folks I share no common interests with. But they came up to me and explained to me our roles. Which is-
1:26:36🔗DrewThere's a couple of parts I do enjoy about this job. One is when I run into the drunk frat guy who explains what we both do on the show. Hey, dude, you know I like you, dude, because you make the jokes and Drew's like the medical dude. Drew's like with the medical and the serious, and he's like vaginismus and you should use protection. Then you, you're like with the comedy. You make the jokes. I'm always like, hold on, let me grab a scratch pad. This is-
1:27:14🔗DrewWe're going to capture lightning in a bottle here. I wonder if this guy ran into like Pat Sajak and say, you like ask the questions in Vanna, she turns the letters, and that's what I like. Because you see, you- Yeah, that's it. That is exactly the way it works. I like that one. I get the, where's Dr. Drew constantly.
1:27:41🔗DrewConstantly. I now just started giving answers like wherever, he's in the bathroom or he's over at the bar. I just, as if we traveled together. I get that one. But I really, I still do enjoy the explaining, the defining of the roles. I call it. All right. So we got a request for Tim the Russian Rapper. I've not done that quite some time, so I'll give a quick explanation. Tim is a very husky Russian kid that I met when I was involved with the Catholic Big Brother Program. He does not pronounce his name Tim. He pronounces it Team.
1:28:17🔗AdamI still can't believe they let you into that program.
1:28:21🔗DrewWell, as I said, when I was interviewing to get in the Catholic Big Brother Program, which was, could have been about eight years ago now. They ask you a whole series of questions. And some of them are kind of probing, like, how many times a day do you think about sex and things like that?
1:28:41🔗DrewI was thinking about lying. And then I thought to myself, what the hell am I doing here? I mean, they don't pay any money. It's a pain in the ass. You got to take these kids out on the weekends and you got to buy them lunch and dinner or whatever. If you go to Magic Mountain or something, you're paying. And it's kind of a commitment. I don't even know what the hell I thought I was doing. But my point is, is I just decide not to lie during this thing because I said, screw it. If they don't want me, good. So I think they ask about drug use. And I gave a good answer. I think a very solid answer about pot, which was, I don't go out and buy it, but if I'm at a party and there's a joint going around, count me in. I also told them, I'm not Catholic, I'm an atheist, and I don't believe in that nonsense at all.
1:29:26🔗AdamBut the atheist big brother doesn't quite have the same ring.
1:29:29🔗DrewDoesn't have the same ring. And number three, as far as thinking about sex, I told them three times a day. Sounded about right.
1:29:39🔗DrewWhat am I going to tell them, 1,800? I mean, three times sounds about right. And to me, that's code for how much do you whack off, not thinking about sex. Oh, I see.
1:29:51🔗DrewI don't know. I don't know. They cannot be asking about masturbation. But anyway, I was probably about three times a day back then, so that's what I was thinking.
1:29:57🔗AdamBut you got Nate. What's Nate doing now?
1:29:58🔗DrewI don't know what Nate's doing. Nate owes me a phone call. He was my Catholic little brother, and he had a friend named Team.
1:30:09🔗DrewHis name was Tim. Oh, please. His name was Team, and he was this fat Russian kid. He was about 13, 14 years old at the time. Oh, jeez, he's probably in jail now. Jesus Christ, it was about five, six years ago. He's dead or in jail. Anyway, he loved rap music. That was his thing. He loved Dr. Dre and NWA and all that hard stuff, and he would rap along. When I'd pick the kids up, he'd put a cassette, pop a cassette in my car, and he'd sit in the back seat and rap along. So I'm going to give it to you now.
1:30:40🔗DrewYeah, I'll be careful. Yeah. Yeah, I'll edit myself, I think. Thank you. All right. I'm going to start with, I got the bag hand like John McEnroe. That beach steps up, I'm smacking the hole. That was his first rap.
1:31:13🔗DrewThere we go. That's fine. Yeah, that was good. Thank God we took a nice kid from the Russian countryside and filled them with hoes and tricks and bitches. And this kid was great. I mean, we'd be at the beach and he'd be like, we should score some hoes.
1:31:31🔗DrewHe was pasty white and 5'4, about 2'35, 2'40. He was about 14 years old. Looked like he had a thyroid condition, you know? And he was like, that is so dope. That beach is dope. It was great. It was great. The greatest moment I had with the team is when I was driving him and Nate to Magic Mountain after a team had just got done spilling a 72-ounce Super Tanker 7-Eleven drink in my car, you know? Like, you know, filled it. We just stopped suddenly. He topped this thing off. I mean, he had to use a hand truck to get it out to the car. Just set it down and just toppled the thing right on the floor mats there. I mean, it was actually flooded. It flooded my car. It was like a Champ Aquatic, you know? But those guys were lamenting about the chicks hating them at school. They were in 9th or 10th grade. Nate was as skinny as a bean pole. He was all like nose and hair, you know? He probably looked like what Dr. Bruce looked like at 14. You know, and Tim was just one big sack of lard, you know? And I was trying to be encouraging to the boys, and I said, listen, you know, next year you'll be sophomores. You'll get all those, that new crop of freshmen will really go in for you. Tim piped up and he goes, who are you kidding? Nate is too skinny and I'm too fat. And I was like, yeah, that is true. Yeah, you're right. You guys have a life of hell and misery to look forward to. As a matter of fact, you better just go gay now. Angel?
1:34:11🔗AdamAnd young guys believe threesomes is a great thing. The fantasy is far different than reality. And that's not what you're talking about. You're talking about trying to maintain relationships with two different people.
1:34:19🔗CallerWell, we had complained to them before how we were.
1:34:21🔗AdamBefore you started, before you started, before you started dating?
1:34:25🔗CallerYeah, we explained it to them, and they seemed cool with it and everything.
1:34:28🔗DrewWell, listen, everyone's cool with everything at the beginning. Are you, so are you two having a sexual affair?
1:34:36🔗DrewNow, and, yes, yeah, it's real cool, but once you get going, you immediately want them to quit. So you guys are having a physical relationship, you and Amber, right, Angel?
1:35:18🔗DrewBoth of them say no, huh? Yeah. Oh, you found two gay guys. Interesting. I know. All right. Listen, these aren't the right guys for your hectic sexual schedule. Yeah.
1:36:31🔗DrewI'm gonna take a little extended break. We'll be back tomorrow night to be with all you great folks. So just the love that we find between the two hosts. Until next time, Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. We should score some hoes. Well now.