Episode 1000754888005

0:00 Voiceover Loveline, Loveline, Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Losing her discretion advised. Now, here's Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191 With Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

0:14 Voiceover What are you insane?

0:26 All right.

0:27 Adam Hey, Jessica, Jessica.

0:30 I'm here.

0:31 Adam You're 14. All right. I don't like your attitude. Move on. I'm just punching the next line. Jessica can hang on for a little while longer.

0:40 Drew No, no, no.

0:40 Here we go.

0:41 Adam Don't touch that screen, Drew.

0:42 Drew It freaks me out.

0:43 Don't touch it.

0:45 Adam It's like his hand entered another dimension. We got some NEC technology in here. It's the, like I said before, I know that Westwood 1 has a very strict policy about letting anything in the building that was built after 1971, and I'm sure this was in some sort of... No, no. I was going to say like quarantine while the crack staff at Westwood 2 went over it to make sure it was okay to bring it in. They don't trust this. They call it black magic. Computers, DAT machines, CD players, things like that. Don't touch it, Drew. You're scaring me. We've got a new screen.

1:25 David.

1:27 Adam David?

1:28 Hello. How are you? I'm pretty good, but I'm kind of confused.

1:33 Drew What's up?

1:36 I have a neuromuscular disorder.

1:39 Drew Which one?

1:41 They diagnosed it as progressive spastic paraparousis.

1:45 Drew Okay.

1:46 And they did a muscle nerve biopsy, and my nerve endings, the coatings, is wearing off. So they put me on Valium and Baclofen.

2:03 Drew Okay.

2:04 And they also put me on the TENS unit to control the pain in the leg.

2:09 Adam Horrible. Let me jump in for a second here and explain the difference between real calls and bogus calls. Bogus calls aren't chocked full of specific information.

2:20 Right.

2:21 Okay.

2:21 Adam Usually, like, when I first heard...

2:23 Okay, I'll go straight to the detail. Hold on a second.

2:25 Adam No, you're fine, David. When I first heard David's voice, I thought, oh, he's...

2:28 Drew Making it up.

2:29 Adam He's making... this guy's pulling their crank. But the second he got into all the specific detail, you know, immediately, because usually, Drew asked one question. Oftentimes, what year were you born? And they stammer for 20 minutes, and then they round into decades. I was born in the... Around the 70s.

2:46 Drew Around the 70s. But, David, the spastic parapericis is really just a description.

2:51 Adam Do they call it parapericis?

2:53 Drew Yeah.

2:53 Adam Did the spastic guy name it? Name it?

2:55 Drew You know, parapericis is...

2:57 Parapericis refers to the... Your lower extremities.

3:02 Drew Right. Parapericis is paralysis of both lower extremities.

3:04 Adam So you got paralysis of the parapericis?

3:06 Drew But it's spastic. So it's...

3:09 Spasticity, what it is, the nerves are going weak.

3:14 Drew Yeah.

3:14 And the muscles in the hips and knees are going weak.

3:17 Drew Got it.

3:18 Okay.

3:18 Adam Oh, it's like you're an old German shepherd or something.

3:21 Yeah.

3:21 Oh, baby.

3:22 And the nerve-ending coatings is wearing off.

3:25 Drew What's the question? So you have a demyelinating disease. So the myelin coating is coming off. Is that right?

3:31 Adam Is this bad, Drew?

3:34 So eventually I wind up in a wheelchair permanently.

3:40 Drew Do you have any other medical problems?

3:43 No.

3:43 Drew Okay. What's your question tonight?

3:44 Okay. I got a penal implant.

3:47 Drew Because of the paraparousis?

3:48 Because of, yes, it interfered with it.

3:50 Drew Okay.

3:51 Once I would go to perform, I would lose it. But now when I go to have my orgasms, instead of it coming out, it's backing up and it comes out in my urine.

4:05 Drew You're getting retrograde ejaculation, that's called.

4:08 Adam Well, does it feel good?

4:11 Sometimes it does and other times it's frustrating.

4:14 Adam Well, I just prefer not come out. I mean, if it felt okay.

4:18 Drew We had that guy who used to push on his...

4:20 Adam Yeah, they're guys who take their index finger and put it halfway up their ass just so nothing comes out of their penis. I got to tell you, I'd save myself four or five thousand dollars a year in paper towels if I had this problem. The drapery alone, Drew, having to be sent out almost on a daily basis. So, hey, but David, let me ask you a question. Yes. Do you have a speech impediment? And is that connected? That's in no way connected to the paraparalysis?

4:54 Yes, it is. Slow learning, vision problems, speech problems.

5:01 Drew Okay, so you have a generalized demyelidic disorder sometime, huh?

5:05 Yeah.

5:05 Drew And it has created asbestic paraparicis and lower extremities.

5:09 Correct. Has it?

5:09 Drew What is your overall illness? Is it MS?

5:16 Huh?

5:16 Drew Is it multiple sclerosis?

5:18 No, they put it under the muscular dystrophy.

5:22 Drew Muscular dystrophy, okay.

5:24 And...

5:26 Adam David, so you've always had this.

5:28 Yeah.

5:28 Adam Yes, from burn with it.

5:30 And it progressively gets worse.

5:32 Drew So he's getting asbastic paraparicis on top of his muscular dystrophy.

5:36 Adam Has Jerry Lewis been able to do anything at all for you?

5:41 They just started a gene study on my family. So they got the genes from everybody in the family, and they're taking the healthy ones and the sick ones, and the ones with the bad genes, they're going to isolate the gene and find out what's missing in the...

5:59 Adam Let me tell you, that's my plan for the United States in a more overall way. I'd like to start isolating what I call the bad genes, the bad seeds, and working on them. David, it sounds like your life has been hell.

6:14 Yes. So I got one... My main question is, the doctor wants to put me on a pill that will... Viagra? I believe that's what it is to make the orgasm go forward. But I also have a spastic bladder.

6:34 Drew Hey, work with the urologist on this, okay, David? There are medications that can help you, but as you know, this is a generalized neuromuscular disorder, and it's going to affect nervous autonomic, nervous function, such as erection and ejaculation, I'm sure.

6:52 Adam All right. Let's just all just take a moment of silent thanks for not being spastic, not having this disease, not having the retrograde ejaculation, or being confined to a wheelchair.

7:07 Drew Oh, and the muscular dis-

7:08 Adam I couldn't imagine.

7:09 Drew You know, it progresses, and these will be, you know, for somebody with this, it's nice to have these kinds of concerns, because then it becomes about issues of breathing, cardiac function.

7:17 Adam I'm pissed because I can't dunk a basketball.

7:19 Drew Right.

7:20 Adam You know what I'm saying?

7:21 Drew Yes.

7:21 Adam That's the beauty of life. I can be upset that I could just touch the rim, and maybe I could like take a tennis ball and push it through, but I can't dunk, and Spud Webb, who's 5'2, can jam, and I'm really pissed about that.

7:34 Oh boy.

7:35 Adam All right.

7:36 Drew Shall we start the show, Drew?

7:37 Adam Phone number, 1-800-L-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-44-55. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. James Lesure is here. He is from For Your Love. This is a sitcom that was on, I think it was on NBC. It's moved to WB. We had Debbie Pfeiffer and Holly Robinson on the TV show from this show. Do you remember that, Drew? No. Okay. I can't remember it either, but Ann told me. No, I remember them coming on. I think Debbie Pfeiffer came on the radio show. And I know Holly Robinson came on the, TV. Yeah, because she told us that story about Shaq.

8:18 Oh, okay.

8:19 Drew I remember now.

8:20 Yes, yes, yes.

8:21 Adam All right. So James is here and he'll be in here in just a few minutes to talk about For Your Love and Drew. Drew is going to be on Oprah.

8:29 Drew Probably. If we can work it out here.

8:32 Adam He's going to be on Oprah Friday morning. Yeah.

8:34 Drew I don't know when they're going to film it.

8:36 Adam When did the wheels come off her show? What are you doing on that show?

8:38 Drew Desperation.

8:39 Adam Well, kid, you're going to be on with at least a panel of 14. At least.

8:44 Drew Yeah. Yeah. But here's the deal. They want to know does Mr. Clinton's behavior and Hillary's response to it or lack of response to it affect young people. So I would like to hear from our callers, from our listeners, to know if there is, if you really believe it is affecting you or your culture or how your peers behave, that sort of thing. Let me know because I need some ammunition to go in there on Friday morning with.

9:07 Adam Right. Who else are you going to be on there with? Fifty other people.

9:09 Drew Who knows? Okay. I know it's not going to be.

9:11 Adam But you're going to be on Oprah.

9:13 Drew Yeah. It works out. We'll see here.

9:15 Adam They didn't ask about me at all.

9:19 Drew They literally said that this will be just, you know, they sort of apologized that it's going to be a panel of 20, and next time you will come on with me and there will be a much more committed show.

9:28 Adam There's not going to be next time. They're all going to pay. Jessica?

9:31 Yeah.

9:32 Adam You're 14.

9:33 Caller Yeah. I have a question that might relate to both of you guys, but back when I was, you know, just a newborn and everything, my grandma, I think she's an alcoholic, but she's not any longer.

9:48 Drew You mean she's in recovery?

9:49 Adam She died last summer.

9:50 Caller Yeah.

9:51 Drew She's in recovery?

9:52 Caller No, she's been fully recovered. She's an alcoholic, so no.

9:55 Drew Okay, she's in recovery.

9:57 Caller But my mom believes that she taught me how to do some kind of sexual action. And I think it's some sort of masturbation. I've never really looked into it at all. And I still have the habit and everything.

10:12 Drew What do you do?

10:13 Adam Your mom believes your grandmother taught you this technique when you were young and she was drunk.

10:20 Caller Yeah.

10:20 Drew What do you do?

10:22 Caller Well, it's not sticking fingers anywhere or anything like that. But it's right in between my inner thighs and my abdomen. I press really hard right there. You know, it's nice and it feels good in the thing. So I don't know what it is at all.

10:40 Drew Why does your mother know you do this?

10:42 Adam Oh, did I? Oh, I'm sorry. Anne's right. I said Debbie Pfeiffer. I should have said Dee Dee Pfeiffer. Yeah, I wrote it down wrong. I knew that was her name.

10:51 Caller She actually doesn't. I haven't really talked to her at all about it.

10:55 Drew You're confusing me.

10:56 Adam Here's what happened. Here's what I'm guessing. I'm guessing Jessica's grandmother did something weird or let somebody do something weird to Jessica's mother and she's sort of projecting something.

11:07 Drew But why would mom, if she didn't know what Jessica does, why would mom walk up and say, you're doing something weird?

11:15 Caller Well, because sometimes I'm like watching TV shows or something in the living room. I get away with it, like under the blankets or something in the living room. And now she's like, well, are you doing something weird? And I'm like, oh, no, you know, of course. And I didn't have you.

11:31 Drew Were you living with your grandmother?

11:33 Caller No, no, I live with my mom right now. And I think it must have been, you know, if I went over to her house or something.

11:40 Adam Well, hold on, Drew, quiet down. Let me get to the bottom of this. There's where's your dad?

11:47 Caller They're separated. He was from Southern California.

11:50 Adam What about your grandfather?

11:53 Caller He was with my grandma.

11:54 Adam So they're still together. Has your mom ever said anything about somebody doing something to her? Like her mother or her father when she was younger?

12:04 Caller Yeah, when she was eight years old.

12:05 Caller What happened?

12:07 Caller Her father, Melissa, I think.

12:10 Caller Of course.

12:11 Adam All right. Now listen, all you a-holes out here who think Drew's a smart one and I'm the dumb one, please, he reads JAMA once a year and he's a genius. I know what's going on in the minds and the hearts of today's youth.

12:25 Drew Did the grandpa do something to you to think?

12:27 Caller No, I don't think so.

12:30 Adam No, but the mom does. I don't know why the mom dropped you off over there.

12:34 Drew That's weird.

12:36 Adam That's what she thinks was going on. I'm saying this is mama's thing. This is left over.

12:43 Drew But Jessica does do something kind of funny, isn't that right? Are you uncomfortable with what you're doing there, Jessica?

12:49 Caller Well, I don't even know what it is. I've grown up with it and I've done it all my life.

12:57 Adam You sort of push on your crotch?

12:59 Caller Yeah, that's what it is.

13:02 Adam And it feels good?

13:03 Yeah.

13:05 Adam Hey, can you fax in how that works? Because I may try that later on. And do you have an orgasm?

13:12 Caller You know, I don't really know. I've never gotten into those types of things.

13:17 Adam But you can't stop yourself from doing it, even when your mom's hovering around?

13:22 Caller Well, yeah, and I just hide it. She doesn't even know that I'm doing it.

13:27 Adam Well, apparently she's questioned you on it a few times. So the part about her not knowing that you do it is kind of out the window. Why would she question you on it if she doesn't know you're doing it? Which was Drew's question 20 minutes ago.

13:40 Caller Oh, well, she sees one living room in the blanket and the other one out.

13:45 Drew She knows you're doing something. Don't do anything.

13:48 Adam She needs a miner's helmet in a canary. She knows what's going on under there. You're doing it in front of her. You're rolling around with the blanket over you. Probably watching Renegade or one of those other shows.

14:00 Caller I told her different, so she believes me.

14:03 Adam Sorry. Jessica, but you don't think anybody did anything to you as a kid?

14:09 Caller Well, I don't think so.

14:11 Adam Okay, good. That's what you believe?

14:14 Drew Good.

14:14 Adam We're stopping there.

14:15 Drew The point is that she had an awfully traumatic environment that she was in. My grandma was an alcoholic, dad abused the mom. Mom was serving up her daughter to her abusive dad.

14:25 Adam That's nice.

14:27 Drew I was thinking about this the other day. Kids just stop developing at the point at which they get traumatized. Sexual abuse or living in a traumatic environment is traumatizing. And so you get stuck around age 5. I mean it's all primitive preoccupations about genitalia. You get stuck with it.

14:44 Adam Jessica sounded like she was stuck somewhere. Maybe 79.

14:48 Drew Oh yeah.

14:49 Adam I wish you were born then.

14:50 Caller Long after that.

14:52 Adam I was in the 10th grade.

14:53 Drew Born in 85.

14:53 Adam Listen, here's a tip for all mamas, by the way. If your daddy tried to AF you, keep away. Maybe you shouldn't be dropping off the daughter over at the daddy's place, over at the grandpa's place for the weekend. That's a tip. I don't even have kids. But I'm going to go way out on a limb and say, do not... Look at that as a neighborhood that you got your ass kicked in. Would you want your kid riding their bike through that neighborhood? No. You tell them to steer clear of it. Why? You got your ass kicked in it. Don't bring them back to that.

15:33 Oh boy.

15:34 Adam Carly?

15:35 Yeah.

15:35 Adam You're 15.

15:36 Caller Yeah.

15:37 Adam What's going on?

15:39 Caller Can you say hold on?

15:41 Adam What? What's going on, I said?

15:42 Caller I thought you said hold on.

15:43 Adam I'm having difficulty tonight.

15:46 Caller Drew, have you ever heard of a birth control pill called orthotrycyclin? Yeah. It's said that you shouldn't take it if you have colostatic jaundice of pregnancy.

15:58 Drew Yes.

15:58 Caller What is that?

15:59 Drew It's nothing you have, I guarantee it.

16:01 Caller Because when I was little, when I was born, I was born with jaundice.

16:04 Drew No, no, no, no, no.

16:05 Adam She had jaundice when she was born?

16:07 Drew Carly, that had nothing, nothing, nothing.

16:09 Adam How do you know she doesn't have it?

16:10 Drew Because colostatic jaundice of pregnancy is the pregnant woman's biliary tract becoming sludgy and slowing down. And in all birth control pills, you'll see that typically. So, she had jaundice of infancy, which is a normal thing.

16:28 Adam Did you have jaundice?

16:30 Yeah.

16:31 Adam Not you wackos, you drew them.

16:32 Drew I don't know if I did, but it's very common.

16:35 Adam Nice elusive answer, you didn't have it.

16:37 Drew I might have.

16:37 Adam You did not.

16:38 Drew I might have. It's a common thing. You see the kids under the big bright lights they put them under when they're born? That's to break down the hemoglobin byproducts, the bilirubin.

16:46 Adam Oh really? Let's just keep the fries they're holding warm. Carly?

16:50 Caller Yeah.

16:51 Adam All right. Is that it with you and your question?

16:52 Caller I had another question too, actually. What? Do you know how I can get my mom to stop being like way overprotective?

17:00 Adam Didn't we talk to someone like you last night?

17:02 Drew Yes, we did. Yes, we did. Yes, we did.

17:04 Caller Not me.

17:05 Drew No, no, but someone with the same kind.

17:06 Adam Are you screwing up?

17:07 Caller No.

17:07 Adam You sure?

17:08 Caller Yeah. She's just like way overprotective.

17:10 Adam Are you a virgin?

17:11 Caller Yeah.

17:13 Adam What kind of grades you get in school?

17:15 Caller A's, B's.

17:17 Adam A's and B's? Smoked pot?

17:19 Caller No.

17:19 Adam Smoked cigarettes?

17:20 Caller No.

17:21 Smoked tobacco?

17:22 Caller No.

17:22 Adam Smoked a pipe?

17:23 Caller No. I don't smoke anything.

17:26 Adam Do you ever hung out with any merchant marines?

17:29 Caller No.

17:30 Adam No. All right, so it sounds like you're a pretty good girl, right?

17:33 Caller Well, yeah.

17:33 Adam All right, do you have a dad?

17:36 Caller No.

17:37 Adam Where's he?

17:38 Caller Well, they kind of had this deal. My mom's first kid got taken away from her.

17:43 Drew Why?

17:44 Caller She got pregnant out of marriage, and her mom affords the signature on the adoption papers, and had the adoption agency take her away from her.

17:54 Adam Oh, that's nice.

17:55 Caller Yeah. So when she moved away, she had this big void in her, and she wanted a kid. Yeah, so she had me.

18:05 Drew So she's acting this all out of her guilt and all the heavy stuff on you.

18:09 Adam Yeah. Whenever you're there to fill a void.

18:11 Drew Yeah. It's not good.

18:13 Adam My parents were the opposite. They were too full when they had me and my sister.

18:16 They were the void.

18:18 Adam No. There's no void. They're filled to the top. They had their own problems and their own crap, and the kids just, all we could do is just hang on the side. I wish there was a void in my family. Drew, was there a void that you filled in your family?

18:34 Drew I'm sure we all do.

18:35 Adam All right. So Carly, oh boy. What do you suggest?

18:41 Drew That she become assertive with her mom, that she develop a system of some sort of reward and touch. I suggested last night that she get a trusted adult who's the mom of somebody she knows that she can sort of help as a liaison to help the mom be more reasonable and more healthy.

18:57 Adam I don't remember that. Sarah.

18:59 You're 15.

19:01 Drew By the way, when I was saying that last night, you were going, all right, all right, all right.

19:04 Adam Well, that was 45 minutes into your speech. Sarah.

19:08 Drew Yeah.

19:08 Adam You're 15. You want to make a comment about Clinton that Drew is going to bring with him to Oprah.

19:14 Caller Yeah.

19:15 Adam He'll never get a word in edgewise, by the way. He'll be right in between Shecky Green and Mother Love, and he'll never get a word in. I know these panel shows work.

19:24 Yeah. I think Clinton is just a big asshole, and I don't know anybody that really cares anything about him, and like my friends and stuff. So I don't know why it would affect the young people.

19:37 Drew What if Hillary had said, You know what? That's unacceptable behavior. I'm leaving you.

19:41 That would have been cool.

19:42 Drew That would have been a good thing. Yeah. So maybe her not doing something affects you.

19:46 Maybe. I don't know.

19:48 Drew Would it affect how you conduct yourself in relationships?

19:49 Adam Maybe the reason she thinks he's a big a-hole is because of the way he's been conducting himself.

19:54 Drew I understand that, but it's sort of she believes therefore it doesn't matter to me and I'm not concerned with him.

20:00 Adam Right.

20:00 Right?

20:02 Yeah, sort of, yeah.

20:03 Adam So do you think it would have been a positive step for Hillary to take to dump him, therefore sending a message to the young woman of the nation not to tolerate these sort of shenanigans?

20:15 Yeah, of course, dude, because that's not right.

20:18 Drew So that would have been cool.

20:19 Yeah.

20:20 Drew So mostly, so you're disappointed in her reaction.

20:22 Yeah, because she shouldn't take this crap from him. If he's done this, if he's really done this, she should just leave and take Chelsea with her.

20:29 Drew Do your friends feel that way?

20:30 Yeah, they really, they don't care about Quintin anymore. They think he's just a stupid jerk.

20:36 Caller All right.

20:38 Drew Fair enough. Thanks for the comment.

20:39 Adam I remember growing up with the whole Nixon thing.

20:41 Drew Yeah, it sounds very familiar, doesn't it? Sounds very familiar, doesn't it?

20:44 Adam Yeah, especially when you're hanging around with the hippie.

20:47 Drew With Zorbach.

20:48 Adam My mom's hanging out with the Zorbach and Happy and Sunshine. And I was about ready to like tape plastic explosives to myself and storm the White House at night. When was that? Like 74, 73? I'm looking to the Peanut Gallery for answers. You're not going to find it. Early 70s. Yeah. I was nine years old, eight years old maybe even. And I remember when that whole thing went down.

21:16 Drew Oh, sure. I watched the Watergate Hearings, remember that?

21:18 Adam You did?

21:19 Drew Oh, sure.

21:20 Adam What did you watch it on?

21:21 Drew TV.

21:22 Adam They just had it on the regular stations?

21:23 Drew It was like the same kind of coverage as the OJ trial. Really? This was all the time, yeah.

21:30 Adam Should have got Cochran in this corner. James Lesures here. He is from For Your Love, and we will be back with him and me and you and Drew after this. Hey, it's the Loveline, phone number 1-800-L-E-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-854-4455, Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew, James Lesures here. For Your Love is the name of the sitcom. Now, let's just, Thursday nights, 9.30 on the WB, Dee Dee Pfeiffer, who we had in on the radio.

22:26 Caller Debbie Pfeiffer.

22:28 I'm kidding.

22:29 Adam I wrote it down, Debbie, but I remember her. She's, she's Michelle Pfeiffer's younger sister. Younger sister. Yeah. And of course, Holly Robinson, who we had on the TV show. And I remember this. Now, the show was on NBC originally.

22:46 James Lesure Yeah, last spring.

22:47 Adam And it was a replacement show.

22:49 James Lesure Mid-season replacement, yeah.

22:51 Adam And now, and this is becoming more and more common that shows are jumping networks, right? And I don't know if this happened 10 years ago, or maybe I don't remember if MASH was on something else before it was on CBS or whatever it was, but it seems lately that this is happening more and more often, and that sometimes shows, especially in syndication, such as like Baywatch, they start on a network, then they go somewhere else, and then they have this huge life.

23:23 James Lesure Right.

23:23 Adam So we're hoping for that.

23:24 James Lesure Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm glad, I mean, some shows get dropped and never get picked up, so you know, to go to a different house is cool with us. WB is like a young network, new, up-and-coming, so it's cool to be over there.

23:38 Adam Now, how does their new fall lineup look? Have you seen those shows?

23:42 James Lesure Yeah, they're going to have some good stuff. I can't name any of the shows, but I went to like the New York press release of it, announcing all the new shows, and a couple of them looked really kind of hot, so.

23:52 Adam And they dropped the www.

23:54 James Lesure The Frog.

23:54 Adam WB. Is the Frog gone?

23:57 James Lesure I think so, man. I've been avoiding it.

24:01 Adam Whoever came up with that should be burnt, and then we should all, you know how we should put him out when he's on fire? We should all urinate on him. That's the beauty of TV. We heard that WW thing when it came out about three years ago, and I announced that this was the worst idea ever, but it still took three years to get off the air. Oh yeah. See, Phil, when they see the Frog, they're going to tune in. Every time they see a Frog, they're going to think WB. You're camping, you go down to the stream to fill your canteen, you see a Frog, what do you think? Budweiser. No, WB, Phil, you're fired. Genius. So, For Your Love, and is the new season starts? I guess all the networks started at slightly different times, don't they? When's the WBs?

24:48 James Lesure Our starts, I don't know, our starts on the September 17th.

24:53 Adam So, not this coming Thursday, but the one after that. All right. So, we can all look for that. Also, James went to USC, Drew. Drew's got a little boner now. Oh, yes. Look at him sit back up. No, Drew went to SC.

25:07 James Lesure Medical school at SC.

25:08 Adam Yeah. Folks bought him right on into that. What did you study, James?

25:12 James Lesure Theater. Just went to the school of theater.

25:15 Adam And look at you now.

25:17 James Lesure Look at me.

25:19 Adam Did you have any classmates that were able to parlay it in anything?

25:23 James Lesure Yeah. I got a ton of classmates that are out here working and stuff, being pretty successful. So we got a pretty good number of folks out here doing all right.

25:31 Adam I always hear about SC's film school.

25:33 James Lesure Yeah.

25:34 Adam And I would assume that means they have a pretty good theater department in general. But I always just hear about the film school, never about the theater department.

25:43 James Lesure Right. The theater department is much more world-renowned, like you just said. I don't know. The film, the theater school is cool. I had a great time. But I don't know why the film school gets so much more prestige, but it does.

25:54 Adam I think it's that Spielberg.

25:56 James Lesure They got more money than we do.

25:57 Adam I had this plan hatch where I was going to break into his head.

26:00 James Lesure I don't know.

26:00 Caller I don't want to talk about that.

26:02 Adam Drew, can you stop reading outside material and join the show, please?

26:05 James Lesure Come on, man. We're going. I thought we had SC Love going on. What are you reading, Drew?

26:09 Adam Drew just picked up some e-mail and started reading it right in the middle of the SC Love Fest. Rob? Yeah? You're 17. Yep. What's going on?

26:19 Caller Basically, I'm gay and I'm trying to figure out how to come out to my mom. Everyone else in my family knows, and she's the only one who doesn't.

26:28 Adam How do they all know?

26:30 Caller Told them and they just kept it to themselves.

26:32 Drew Where's your dad?

26:34 Caller He died when I was five.

26:36 Drew Why did I? I just had an immediate sense that his dad didn't know. So your brothers and sisters don't know?

26:41 Caller My oldest sister is 32. She's a lesbian. She's really cool about it and everything else.

26:46 Adam Of course. She's got to be. She can't come down on you. She's a lesbian. Did somebody feel you up when you were young?

26:53 Caller Nope.

26:54 Adam Really?

26:54 Drew What did your dad die from?

26:56 Caller Drug overdose.

26:57 Drew Imagine that.

27:00 Adam And what about your sister, the older? She's 32?

27:05 Caller Wow.

27:06 Adam Got a little separation going there. Did anything ever happen to her that she speaks of?

27:14 Caller I really don't know. I know that she had an abortion from my father.

27:18 She slept with my father. Right.

27:21 Adam We're trying to put two and two together here. Let's see. But, other than your father and pregnanting, is there anything... No mishaps other than that?

27:30 Nope.

27:31 Drew And the rapes that followed?

27:33 Nope.

27:33 Adam Alright. So, things seem to be alright. Hmm. Hey, Rob. We're starting to make fun of you, but you understand this is a...

27:42 Drew This is as sick as a family gets. Do you understand that? Yep. It doesn't get sicker than this.

27:50 Adam Your dad got your sister pregnant?

27:54 Caller Yeah, it's a long story.

27:56 Drew Well, whatever. I mean, it's as someway did mess with you, substantially. Whether they sexually abused you or not, they messed with you in every other way possible.

28:04 No.

28:05 Adam No?

28:06 Drew Living with a drug addict dad who impregnates your sister, who dies at a young age, isn't something that has emotional impact, you don't think?

28:14 Adam It may, but... Rob, my dad missed a couple of Pop Warner football games.

28:17 Caller I'm still pissed.

28:19 Adam I got to tell you. Rob, I swear to God I'm still mad.

28:22 Drew Profound, profound impact on who you are and your emotional health.

28:28 Profound.

28:30 Adam So Rob, you know what our advice is. Our advice is instead of sort of running with whatever sexual path you've decided on, instead of just running down that path blindly and telling as many people who will listen, why don't you just sit back and hold off on it a little bit and do a little exploration. I'm not telling them not to be gay. I just mean.

28:56 Drew Okay, I understand that. That's not bad advice. Or if you are enjoying your choice, your homosexual orientation, develop a network of friends and a supportive lifestyle. So when it does come time, when it is important to tell your mom, you'll have enough support just in case the reaction isn't what you want. What's the hurry to tell your parents?

29:17 Adam Oh, what parents?

29:19 Drew I know, but 17 you were telling mom what you were doing?

29:22 Adam Hell no.

29:23 Drew Of course not.

29:25 Adam I was running the shower while I was masturbating. And you know, I was so nervous I actually ran the shower. We had four bathrooms. I ran them all at once. And then masturbated in the maid's room. I wasn't going to take any chances. They didn't even know what shower I could be in. Please. James, I swear to God we've been doing this show for two and a half years. I've not met somebody or have not spoken to somebody who was gay or lesbian that wasn't screwed around with at some point. And I'm not saying you have to be screwed around with to be gay or lesbian, but I am saying it helps.

29:57 James Lesure Right.

29:58 Adam His sister, my sister, she said her sister is 32 and a lesbian. I said, what happened to her? Dad screwed her. Of course she's a lesbian.

30:09 James Lesure Right.

30:09 Adam I mean, would you ever go back into a man's arms after that?

30:12 James Lesure After your pop gone?

30:13 Drew You had another theory, too, that you mentioned last night, that the over intrusive mom.

30:18 Adam Right. Although all bets are off in this situation because of... I mean, our question is, how do you even know what your sexuality is when this happens to you?

30:30 Right.

30:31 Adam I mean, you could be born to a family in Beverly Hills, but if they took you to Morocco as an infant, you would be participating in the cultures, in the religions, you'd be doing all the Moroccan crap. You'd be eating couscous till your head exploded. Is that what they eat over there? It sounded like something Moroccans would eat, and our listeners are too stoned to call me on it. You will soak in whatever environment you dropped off in, and if you're dropped into sexual chaos and impregnating your daughter, if that's not sexual chaos, I don't know what is, then why is it a surprise when you have some chaos later on in life?

31:14 James Lesure Do you believe, though, that there's a natural disposition of being gay, too? I mean, you can be born with it?

31:19 Drew It's like anything else in human behavior, that there is a... It's a combination of the biological predisposition of the organism with the environment's impact.

31:27 Adam But for some reason...

31:29 Drew Some people who are sexually abused become then sexual predators. If they don't become gay, they become abusive to women.

31:35 Adam Right. Or to men, or whoever, but they become predators. The gay community does not like... They don't like it to be chalked up to an environment. They want it to be a physical problem, because that way it seems like more like cancer than it does emotional difficulty.

31:59 Drew There's not a period where anything you can do about it anyway, as we've brought up many times. Right. It is what it is. Whatever causes it, it just is.

32:05 Adam Yeah. Whatever you're into, you're into, and we're not going to talk you out of it. Although I bet if I got you drunk, I could get something off you. Chris. What's up? These thespian types. They're open to anything.

32:15 James Lesure Chris, what's up?

32:16 Adam I was reading the bio. He was a nude doing hair. You know.

32:20 James Lesure These are being the thespian.

32:21 Adam These are actor types. You can get a few tall boys in them. They'll do anything. Come on. Hey, hey. Take your pants off. It's part of the interview. Hey, Chris. What's going on?

32:33 Caller Hey, what's up, guys?

32:35 Adam We're just talking to you.

32:36 Caller Right on. Hey, first of all, I want to say I love your show. First time caller, longtime listener.

32:42 James Lesure Thanks, Chris.

32:44 Caller Adam, you are a god.

32:47 Drew Adam is a god.

32:47 Adam Wow. That makes you the devil, Drew.

32:50 Caller I love you, man.

32:51 Adam Thanks. You had a question about acid or peyote?

32:56 Yeah. Really?

32:59 Adam That's it?

33:00 Caller No. Well, yeah. Yeah, go on. I just wanted to say that. But also I want to say in regards to the last call and then also last night, you had a gay caller calling in last night. And I'm gay and I have not been molested and actually my father or my mother was not over domineering. It was actually my father.

33:24 Adam Switched at birth.

33:25 Caller Yeah.

33:26 Adam There's a mix-up at the hospital. Really?

33:30 Caller Yeah.

33:30 Adam You just went gay on your own.

33:32 Caller Yeah. That's good.

33:32 Adam And that's why, see now you notice that Chris sounds very healthy, by the way. He doesn't question his gayness at all.

33:38 Drew Right.

33:38 Adam He may question his anus once in a while, but not his gayness.

33:41 Drew Did you feel compelled to stand up at Christmas dinner and announce it to your parents?

33:45 Caller Oh, absolutely not. And as a matter of fact, I've been listening to the show for a long time. And I know you've been saying that, you know, and I have not felt that and actually I'm with you. And I think there's something strange about someone who feels that way as well.

33:58 Adam Right. This is just what you sort of healthily happened into. It wasn't like somebody forced your hand by some horrible atrocity that was committed toward you when you were a kid.

34:10 Right.

34:11 Adam Yeah. I like that. All right, Chris, if I go gay, I'm calling you up.

34:15 Caller Right on.

34:16 Adam We're going to party. And I can fix the car and the house.

34:19 James Lesure Don't you folks ask though? Don't you folks, they don't see any girls around, don't they go, what's up?

34:24 Caller Well, you know, they probably, I don't know.

34:28 Adam Do they know now or they don't know?

34:30 Caller No, they still don't.

34:31 Adam Yeah.

34:32 Caller But I don't know, I mean, you know, I'm just kind of cool with it.

34:35 Drew You'll tell them eventually.

34:36 Caller You know, I probably hang out with a lot of girls, and so, you know, they probably don't think anything about it.

34:42 Drew Are you bi?

34:43 Caller No.

34:44 Drew You'll tell them eventually.

34:45 Caller Oh, yeah.

34:45 Drew Yeah, when you feel comfortable and you're secure and you've got a network, a life. Oh, yeah. Then it's time to disconnect and let them know who you really are.

34:53 Adam I guess. I mean, we think about it, though. You think they want to know?

34:59 Drew No.

35:00 Adam They don't want to know.

35:01 Drew That's why most parents don't want to ask the questions. They don't want to know the answer, I think.

35:06 Adam Would you want to know, James, if your children were gay?

35:12 Drew Yeah. Of course you want to know. You want to know who they are. I think, yeah. But you don't want to deal with it. You might resist asking the question.

35:18 Adam Right. I really don't want to know anything about anyone's sexuality that isn't, that's in my family. That's within my family. My, you know, as you know, my grandmother, once in a while, likes to pull a zinger out. And she told me the other day, she probably wasn't going to start. I got to see her tomorrow night. You know, I swear I got to slip my own wrist because she listens to the show. She sits home and listens. And then I always do these things on the night before I see her. But she goes, I don't know, I was just over at her house. It was about two weeks ago. And she said, yeah, I was, anyway, I had to go to the hospital. I went in for a checkup the other day. And it wasn't about anything. And but she said, went in for a checkup and got a pap smear. And anyway, then when I was coming home and I was like, oh, did I have to hear about the pap smear part? We couldn't have just left it a checkup. It had nothing to do with the conversation we're having. But all of a sudden, I had to picture Grandma on Star. I had to. And I didn't want to, but I had to just like you're doing it now, Drew. And I thought, why did that need to be worked in? Because the conversation was about something, something was wrong with her car or something. And she was saying, I had to drive in and I was driving back, got a quick bathroom, and I said, oh, I don't, there's no physical movement, but inside I go, oh, that's it. There'll be no masturbation tonight. Thanks, grandma. Okay. Do you even, do you get that when you're 83 years old, 84 years old?

36:51 Drew It's a good idea. A lot of women refuse to do it.

36:53 Adam Really? Who cares what's going on down there at 84?

36:56 Drew Listen, why are you doing health screening if you're not going to be doing health screening? You know what I'm saying? You can die of cancer of various types. Really?

37:04 Adam 84?

37:05 Drew Ovarian, cervix, uterus?

37:06 James Lesure Sure.

37:06 Drew Absolutely.

37:08 James Lesure Absolutely.

37:09 Adam If you're going to do, you know, Do those gynecologists, is there like a, I don't want to offend old folks, but did they get a bump for that? You know, like they have hazardous duty pay or were in the military or on a mine sweep or something and get a few more bucks a week?

37:24 Drew I'm sure it wasn't a gynecologist, it was somebody like me.

37:27 Caller Oh really?

37:29 Adam You didn't look at my grandma, did you?

37:30 Caller Not your grandma.

37:32 Adam James wasn't you either?

37:33 Caller No.

37:34 Adam You're both lucky, that's the right answer. Alright, we're going to go to break. We'll be back with James Lesure.

37:40 Caller Loveline, be right back in a minute.

37:57 Adam Dr. Drew Loveline, Adam Corolla, and the meandering Dr. Drew is kind enough to join us tonight. James Lesure is here. For Your Love is the name of the sitcom. It was on NBC, will be on WB, 9.30 Thursday nights, Dee Dee Pfeiffer, Holly Robinson. Who else is in that?

38:18 James Lesure Adaphe Blackman, DW. Moffat, and Tamela Jones. Wow. Yeah, it's about six of us. And I make up an ensemble.

38:28 Adam And what is your schedule? Table read Monday?

38:33 James Lesure Wednesday. We start tomorrow, a new script tomorrow. And we rehearse on Thursday and Friday. And then we start shooting some stuff on Monday. And we tape in front of a live audience on Tuesday.

38:45 Adam Is it will Tuesday? That'll be your normal taping day?

38:48 James Lesure Yeah.

38:49 Adam Oh, that's weird. Yeah. Don't most shows tape on like Thursday or Friday?

38:53 James Lesure Yeah, I think. This Tuesday was new to me. But it's worked out great, man. You get weekends to kind of hang out and chill out.

39:00 Adam Right.

39:01 James Lesure And it's cool.

39:02 Adam Right. It's like the good news is the work week begins on Wednesday. The bad news is the other week doesn't end until Tuesday.

39:09 James Lesure Right.

39:10 Adam Instead of Friday. But that's a good life. Drew and I did a sitcom once that I swear to God.

39:17 Drew They canceled it.

39:18 Adam They canceled it. But it wasn't our sitcom. It was called All Fired Up.

39:22 Drew Fired Up.

39:23 Adam Fired Up.

39:23 James Lesure Fired Up. That was on NBC as well.

39:25 Adam Right. Leah Remini who is just got picked up for something else. I just saw her on some New Fall Lineup whatever. A little firecracker. Anyway, King of Queens. Right. Oh, man. You're Homer. I'm scared the hell out of me. Yeah. Leah Remini was on that and she was on our show. We kind of made friends with her. And I think she got somebody to write a Loveline script. And they did an episode of Fired Up based on Loveline. So Drew played himself and he didn't even pull that off. I played Othello. No, I played myself and Diane Farr played herself. And we had some lines and it was kind of cool. At the table read on Monday and went all the way through the week. We'll tape it on our set, we'll tape it on their set. And it never made it there.

40:13 James Lesure Ah, guys.

40:15 Drew Cancel the show that way.

40:17 Adam I think we were just the last nail in the coffin. We didn't build the coffin. Still be fun to get hold of that one of these days.

40:25 James Lesure I don't know, you guys could be sitcom poison. I was going to suggest maybe talking to some people on our show.

40:30 Adam We got, let's see, we were on Kenan like four or five times and drove that show off the air.

40:39 Drew And Vibe, same thing.

40:40 Adam Vibe is still on the air. Oh. But see, isn't it? Vibe is still on the air.

40:45 James Lesure They are showing it in syndication.

40:46 Adam Oh, they are showing it in syndication. Alright, so we killed Vibe, we killed Kenan.

40:50 Drew Remember we were supposed to go on to the last, the night that Vibe, the day Vibe got canceled. Remember?

40:55 Adam Really?

40:55 Drew We were all set up to go out there and they canceled it.

40:59 James Lesure Just the thought of you on the show then.

41:00 Caller That's right.

41:02 Adam Yeah, we're bad, Drew. Jeff, you're 27. I was going to say, who shot Martin Luther King? Was that Lee Javier Oswald? No, James Earl Wright. James Earl Wright. This guy always has five names, this guy. We've hurt the black community more than James Earl Wright. We really have. Jeff.

41:24 Caller Yes.

41:25 Adam What's going on with you, 27?

41:27 Oh, well, it's kind of a long story. I've been married for eight years. About a year ago, I caught my wife cheating on me. And I was just curious. You walked in on her? No, not actually. I walked in the person's yard where she was at. I knew the person. Took everything I could have not to kill the guy, but...

41:55 Adam You suspected something and sort of were spying, right?

41:58 Yeah, I suspected something.

42:01 Adam Wasn't like the frisbee went over the fence.

42:03 Yeah.

42:04 Adam Right. So you were sort of following her around.

42:07 Well, yeah.

42:09 Adam Was the guy a friend of yours?

42:11 No, he was a friend of a friend of mine.

42:15 Adam And what made you initially suspect it was him?

42:18 Well, there were some times that she would leave and not come home till about midnight.

42:22 Drew But why him?

42:23 Um, I don't know. I really honestly can't tell you how I knew. I don't know how. I just figured I'd drive by his house.

42:32 Adam So you jumped over and you went around the backyard to where the master bedroom window was and you saw him through the window.

42:38 No, no, no. I actually...

42:40 Adam Don't screw with my ideas. I thought that was a brilliantly laid plan. Wasn't it, James?

42:45 James Lesure Yeah.

42:47 Adam You were right with me.

42:48 James Lesure Yeah, no doubt.

42:49 But...

42:50 James Lesure Well, what happened?

42:50 Adam You jumped in the backyard?

42:52 I jumped in the backyard and her car was there, so I knew she was there. I went in and I asked him where she was at and he says that she went with a friend. Just then I seen her duck behind a window, so I knew what was going on. So I basically point blank asked him if he had been doing to my wife. He says, no, no, no, she just needed a friend to talk to. So I go home. My wife had left this time because I was kind of hot, matter speaking. She left at that time and I went home. I confronted her and she had told me what had happened. I never actually walked in on him but she actually had told me that this has happened.

43:39 Adam When you confronted her?

43:40 Yes.

43:40 Adam Yeah. Women who cheat, I believe, most of the time want their men to know they're cheating because they're cheating because of something you're doing. And instead of, and they've tried to tell you a few times, you wouldn't listen. They wanted you to go into therapy with them. You wouldn't go. You wanted to go out with your buddies. So now look what happened. Is that true?

44:03 Well actually the first three or four years I was married, I was friends with a jerk basically. He basically had a bad attitude towards women. I was pretty physically and mentally abusive to her.

44:19 Adam Right.

44:20 Drew It was that friend's fault, Adam.

44:22 Adam Payback time.

44:22 Drew It was that friend's fault too, Adam.

44:24 Adam You got that?

44:24 Well it was just as much mine as it was his.

44:27 Adam Well maybe even more yours, right? Because you were married to her?

44:29 Yes.

44:30 Adam Your behavior.

44:31 Drew Not his. Your behavior that we're talking about here.

44:33 Yeah, but we've been through marriage counseling because I demanded that when I found that sap. I said I want to go to marriage counseling and we went to it. But my question to you is I've got three kids and I want to know how can I let myself trust her. You know what I mean? Right. It's real hard for me to trust her. And you know when she goes out she says she's going to a church meeting. I want to know that that's where she's going and you know there's questions in my mind.

45:01 Adam Okay, listen, you're never physically going to know where she's at. So you can just discount that part and eventually they'll give you the slip. So that's not the angle. The angle is the trust angle. It sounds to me like her screwing around with this guy was payback.

45:22 Drew It's all part of the chaos.

45:23 Adam It's all part of the chaos, yes, and I'm sure she comes from some chaos.

45:26 Drew And of course Jeff does too. Jeff you were whacked around as a kid, right?

45:31 Adam And she comes from some chaos herself. And what you need to do is, are you still in therapy with her?

45:41 No, actually it's been a year since. I went to the marriage counseling for about six months. The marriage counselor had told us basically more or less to try it on our own. If we needed it, we could come back. But I hold her hostage sometimes. And it's really hard not to. I mean, I'm going to tell you right now, I've been married to her for eight years. It's hard not to hold her hostage. When she comes home, I question her.

46:12 Adam Yeah, but see, you've got to, Jeff, here's the problem. Your actions are going to get her to cheat faster.

46:18 Drew And again.

46:19 Adam And again.

46:20 Yeah.

46:20 Drew Absolutely.

46:21 Adam You're smothering her like she's on fire and you're trying to put her out.

46:25 Drew How do you make an abuser not abusive, is the thing here.

46:28 Adam And we've got to get you to stop doing what you're doing. It sounds like Jeff needs some individual counseling.

46:33 Drew Right. Is there any way you can take care of yourself and forget about her?

46:38 Adam You know what I'm picturing? I'm picturing, here's what I'd like to do in this nation. Big C-130 plane flying over all what I like to call the hot spots, like where Jeff lives. And therapists, paratroopers, you know, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, all just coming out with supplies.

46:53 Drew Some of the frogmen outfits.

46:54 Adam Desks, steno pads. Some of them being dropped into the bays and rivers and making their way by night onto the shores of America. But I really want to do, I want to load up C-130s with counselors and therapists and just drive them over the heartland and over the inner cities and over this entire country and just drop them in. They'll actually land on the roof of the house that they have to work on.

47:19 James Lesure I'm with you brother.

47:20 Adam Oh man.

47:22 Drew What can we say?

47:23 Adam What do you say to Jeff in a minute?

47:27 Drew There's no easy answer to this. Keep pursuing the professional, maybe individually. Find other ways to take care of yourself, Jeff, and take the focus off her.

47:34 Adam Jeff knows, you know what you're doing, so watch yourself like a hawk.

47:38 Drew Well, here's the deal.

47:39 Adam And when you get drunk, you don't watch yourself real closely.

47:41 Caller That is so rageful.

47:43 Drew He's got to find a way to deal with that arm in for crying out loud on behalf of those three kids. Will you find a way? Just figure it out.

47:50 Adam Okay. There you go. We'll be back. Our standard ten-second top of the hour break, and we'll be right back after this.

48:00 Caller This is Loveline on Radio Station.

48:08 Drew 98KUPD, Tempe, Phoenix.

48:10 Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-V-E-1-9-1. They might be giants are going to be in here tomorrow night. That's a fun band. Smart guys. Never met them. But they sing about smart stuff. Particle Man and all that stuff. That's like a biology lesson. It's like Schoolhouse Rock. That's got James Lesure here. For Your Love is the name of his show. You knew it from NBC and you're soon to know it from the WB. Thursday Nights, 930. Dee Dee Pfeiffer, Holly Robinson, and a cast, a bevy of other characters. You ready to get back to the phones here, James?

48:49 James Lesure Let's do this.

48:49 Adam Christina, you're 16. What's going on?

48:53 Caller I have a comment about the whole Clinton situation.

48:56 Adam Drew poses a question at the top of the show, something he rarely does, but he's going to go on Oprah on Friday, theoretically, and this is a question that they've asked him to ask.

49:09 Drew Which is, are young people affected by his behavior basically?

49:13 Caller I don't think so.

49:14 Drew How come?

49:15 Caller Well, anybody that I've talked to either thinks he's a big player, or that it's just ridiculous.

49:24 Adam Right, but listen, I'm not right-wing, and I'm not conservative, and I don't believe we need to know everything that's going on with everybody, whether they're a politician or not, but don't you think it diminishes the country to some degree to have the Commander-in-Chief sort of carrying on in a way that is something less than noble? I just think that has maybe not a personal profound impact on everybody, but it sort of puts a sort of general haze over the country.

50:03 Caller Well, it might, but I think that's just because of the media attention, and if nobody knew about it, you know, it would be really bad.

50:11 Drew I'll pose the same question I asked the last young person that meant it was the commenting as you have. What would Hillary, how would you think if Hillary had stood up to this and said this is inappropriate and we're not going to stand for it?

50:22 Caller I don't know. I think it shows a lot of strength that she's sticking by him.

50:25 Drew I'm not saying she should leave him, but what if she really came out strongly about how inappropriate the behavior is and the men should not be allowed to do this? I mean, I'm sick about hearing how often people say, this is just how men in power behave.

50:36 Caller That's crazy.

50:38 Adam Well, it's true, but it's crazy.

50:39 Caller But it's crazy.

50:40 Drew Women shouldn't put up with that.

50:41 Caller No, I don't think she is. I think she's probably said something to him, but just because she hasn't said it on TV or-

50:48 Drew Well, but my question is, does it affect you that she's not taking a stand for it?

50:52 Caller No.

50:53 Drew Okay.

50:54 Caller All right.

50:55 Adam Christina, go back to the MTV and the Nintendo. Enjoy the rest of your life.

51:02 Drew All right.

51:03 Adam See? See, the answer I hear for most people is, we don't care.

51:09 Drew Right.

51:09 Adam But it's, of course, he's a philanderer, he's an a-hole. We don't care. But don't you think people have become hardened in a way? Yeah. I mean, I know no one cares now because we've heard so much with so many politicians over so many years, and there's been every campaign now. Hell, we can't even try to get someone into the Supreme Court without a bunch of women popping up and talking about putting pubic hairs on Coke cans and whatnot. I guess people have just sort of tuned it out. I mean, it's sort of, it comes with the territory now. I think ultimately, down the road, this is going to serve politicians because there's going to be a backlash. There's going to be a politician who got up there and there's a film of him in a clown outfit sodomizing retarded four-year-olds. And everyone's going to go, oh, please put it away. We're done. Oh, do you have to drag something out? Oh, you nitpickers. Do we have to see everything that the guy's done?

52:17 James Lesure Right, but that, I mean, that's the worst-case scenario. When I saw what, you know, him admitting to it, I felt bad. I felt like, oh, man, it's like shameful. But I also was pissed off at Ken Starr, kind of, for dragging him out like that. I wanted to know what his motivation was in this whole thing. Why put the country through that? Because it does make us look bad. This is the leader of America, and it's a shameful thing that he had to admit to.

52:44 Adam Right.

52:45 James Lesure And I want to know what Ken Starr's beef was with him.

52:47 Adam People are pissed that not only he did it, but that he was forced to admit it.

52:51 James Lesure Yeah.

52:52 Adam We didn't feel that was right. You know what I mean? That he was essentially forced via Ken Starr and his investigation to come out and make a public address and admit it.

53:03 Drew About some potentially illegal behavior.

53:06 Adam Yeah. But there's a lot of things that are illegal. I mean, he could have taken a leak in the back of the one.

53:10 Drew Including obstruction of justice and all kinds of things.

53:13 Adam Yeah, but see, Drew, here's the argument that Drew and I keep going around in a circle about. Which is, alright, you ask him if he smoked marijuana and he lies. He says he did but he didn't inhale, right? You ask him if he felt up this chick and he lies. Now, he has to lie. Because if he comes clean, he's not going to make it to another term. I mean, we're in an environment where we're forcing him to lie. So, I don't hold it against him if he lies when he's forced to lie. You do. I'd say that's more the fault of the environment than it is of the individual.

53:49 Drew The lying isn't so much the problem. It's the behavior.

53:52 Adam Well, the behavior is... Alright, but let's just take marijuana, for example. Now, everybody's experimented with marijuana. And by the way, you know, it's funny, politicians always use experimented as if they're down in the lab. With the cannabis. And they're experimenting. Experimenting... You don't experiment... That dorm room in Humboldt County, that is no lab. There's not a beaker to be found. And if there was a beaker, it has a hole in the side of it. A guy named Russ has buried his face in it and is trying to suck something through it. He experimented with drugs as if he was part of some project for the Navy, for Christ's sake. But the point is, marijuana is illegal. Although we know everybody partakes in it, including politicians, and certainly at a certain age, if you were born at a certain time and you went to college in the 60s, there's 99.9% of you partook in this activity. But yet he still has to lie. We won't accept it. And I think, I wish we lived in a society where he said, yeah, I did it. I did it like everybody else did. And you know what? I didn't enjoy it. I did it a couple of times and I moved on.

55:07 Drew That's basically what he said.

55:08 Adam Well, he said he didn't inhale, which makes him sound like almost retarded. That's almost a retarded answer, isn't it? I mean, if your four-year-old gave you that answer, you'd start laughing, wouldn't you?

55:21 Drew That was the point of it, though, because the question's retarded.

55:24 Adam It's a ridiculous question. It's a ridiculous answer. But why we can't live in that society where he says, listen, I did it. And frankly, it's none of your business because it doesn't, it has, it's not your main. It really, that was 20 years ago and it doesn't affect my policy making. It has nothing to do with what I think of China or Israel or how much money I'm going to give them or not give them. But anyway, all right. Listen, Clinton's pathological, there's no doubt about it.

55:50 Drew My concern is, though, that we live in the time of, as you and I well know, decaying relationships, the interpersonal depravity, and young people are suffering as a result, families are falling apart. And although this kind of shenanigans has been going on for 50 years at least, never has it been more important for the first family to set an example of some type. Sure. To try to move things in an appropriate, healthier direction.

56:15 Adam Well, but just in, I think it's catch-22 because I don't think an honest man can be elected with the system that we have in place.

56:24 Drew I'm not even, I'm not, you notice I'm not passing judgment. I'm just trying to figure out a way. First, I just want to know what it's done to young people. And secondly, is there a way that they could have been impacted in a way that could have been positive?

56:36 Adam I think, I think if Hillary had kicked him in the, had hired a mule to kick him in the groin, on national TV, that would have healed a lot of young women.

56:43 James Lesure You think Hillary should come out publicly and say something about it?

56:46 Drew I don't know. Well, I think I'm just, I am just really disturbed by men cheat because they can. That's why men cheat. And then women are in a position to just accept that now, really bothers me because it's not appropriate. And it goes right to the heart of the interpersonal problems we have right now, that intimacy is decaying. And there's no way to maintain it if men cheat.

57:09 Adam It is a very interesting point that Drew brings up, which is, I agree with him that I think it does the country more harm that Hillary stands by his side and doesn't say a word because as far as the cheating goes, we all know that's what guys do anyway. Women have the opportunity to put an end to it. And I think it would be a very empowering move to a lot of young women if Hillary got on the horn and said, hey, this is unacceptable.

57:38 Drew She could say, I'm going to stay by him because he is my husband. I made a commitment to this relationship and this guy is going to have to make some changes.

57:44 Adam Wouldn't it be great if they got divorced and she tossed him out, like all divorces? Like he was had to live in a condo in Baltimore. She got Air Force One and the helicopter, full custody of Chelsea and the house.

57:56 Drew I think that would be bad too because that is, again, that's a bad example. But to come up and say, this is unacceptable. That's all. This will not allow this to go on.

58:05 James Lesure So you do want to say something publicly?

58:07 Drew Something. I don't know what it would be exactly.

58:09 James Lesure Let us know how she's feeling.

58:10 Drew And that's why young people would be impacted by some positive way out of this.

58:14 Adam I think there's a happy compromise. He comes out and says, Monica did not inhale. She smoked the joint just a little bit, but she didn't inhale. I can't be the first one to think of that joke. Jason, you're 18. What's going on?

58:32 Caller Alright, the thing is, me and my girlfriend were having oral sex, and I did the thing in her mouth.

58:37 Adam Wow, that's funny. We were just talking about that.

58:40 Drew On this show?

58:42 Caller Alright, anyways, I did it in her mouth, and she got real grossed out, and she spit it out, and there's this real sick discharge inside the rest of it. And later on, I did a little experiment, and I did it on a napkin, and it's really sick in the rest of the stuff.

58:59 Drew What do you mean, the rest?

59:01 Caller In the semen, there's a jelly inside of it.

59:05 Drew Oh, like kernels kind of, right?

59:08 Caller I don't know.

59:09 Drew All right, let's go.

59:10 Adam Well, hold on. Don't get coy on us. We're not the one who whacked off into a napkin, Jason. I don't know. What do you think? Yeah, you're whacking off into a bounty 20 minutes earlier. Now all of a sudden, he's a little incensed. I don't know. What do you think I did? Look at my own sperm.

59:29 Caller That's just kind of scary, you know? I don't know what to do.

59:32 Adam All right, so.

59:33 Drew You're saying chunks, right?

59:35 Caller Yeah.

59:35 Drew That's normal.

59:36 Adam Very normal.

59:37 Drew I'm sorry for your girlfriend, but.

59:39 Adam Yeah, it's sort of like icebergs, right?

59:44 Drew Yeah.

59:45 Caller Okay.

59:45 Adam Right.

59:45 Drew Should you be signing up for it?

59:46 Adam It's very normal.

59:48 Caller Okay, I was just a little scared and I didn't know what to do.

59:49 Drew You're fine.

59:50 Adam All right, she's going to be grossed out no matter what the viscosity or the consistency is. Wouldn't you say?

59:56 Caller Yeah, I guess. I don't know. I've never swung it before.

1:00:00 Adam You never did that before?

1:00:01 Caller No, I'm sorry.

1:00:02 Adam Didn't the guy get pissed? All right. Jason, you'll be fine.

1:00:06 Caller All right.

1:00:06 Adam She'll get over it. Okay, bye. All right. No more whack off and more sieves. I'll use a spaghetti colander, actually. I'll just whack right off into that. Drew, you tell me where to sign me in there?

1:00:18 Drew Yeah, because that's what you don't like to do.

1:00:20 Adam Well, I'm doing it down there.

1:00:22 Drew It's hard if you do it down there.

1:00:23 James Lesure I do it up there. What's that? I had time to get up and go to the cupboard or wherever and get a napkin.

1:00:29 Drew No, no, no, later event, a subsequent event.

1:00:32 Adam Oh, yeah, I think you did an experiment. But at 18, at 18 years old, it's the kind of stuff you can peel off, you know, by the time you make it into the kitchen, you're ready to go again. Now, I'm 34. I go to the market. I could kill a tree, harvest a pulp, and make my own toilet paper, and it still wouldn't be enough time. Okay, where are we going here, Drew? Matthew.

1:00:58 Caller Hi, Dr. Drew.

1:01:00 Caller Hello, Drew. Hello?

1:01:01 Drew Matthew.

1:01:02 Hi, Dr. Drew, Adam. You guys are great. I really appreciate all the work you do.

1:01:05 Adam Say hi to James, too, would you?

1:01:08 Caller Pardon?

1:01:08 Caller Okay.

1:01:10 Caller With the word, Drew.

1:01:11 Adam President, hold on there. I'm putting him on hold.

1:01:15 Drew No, he was just wanting to hear you.

1:01:16 Adam He is?

1:01:16 Drew Let him talk. Let him talk on his phone. Matthew, what's the question?

1:01:19 Yeah, I just want to say, Drew, you're a really smart guy. You really amaze me sometimes with stuff that just comes off the top of your head. And Adam, you're pretty funny. You're hilarious sometimes.

1:01:30 Adam Thanks.

1:01:30 I want to say that I'm a big supporter of Boobville.

1:01:33 Adam Wow, you're an old timer. You smoke a lot of pot?

1:01:37 Caller Not a lot.

1:01:39 Adam Right. About a kilo a week?

1:01:42 Caller Yeah.

1:01:42 Adam Yeah.

1:01:43 Drew What's your question?

1:01:44 I remember hearing you guys, I had a question really quick for you, Adam. I remember hearing you say something about the poo wars.

1:01:53 Caller What was the deal with that?

1:01:55 Adam Oh, for Christ's sake, this guy, he's haunting me. Listen, I don't want to get into that part of my past, but it was about high school time and one of my friends urinated on another friend and the other friend reached in the toilet and threw some dookie at him. It was out of self-defense.

1:02:17 Drew Those were the wars began. Okay. That's when they started.

1:02:19 Adam That's right. Yeah. It evolved into more, but let's not go there. Okay.

1:02:25 Drew You came away of life with these young men.

1:02:27 Adam No, please, Drew. By the time I made 30, I was done. You smell my hand. I'm telling you.

1:02:33 Drew How about the drive-by at the jack-in-the-box?

1:02:36 Adam That was the greatest story ever. I swear. All right. I'm going to tell this story real fast. You get a kick out of this, Matthew. Okay. All right. Hold on a second. This is a true story. One of my friends figured out that, he figured out that if you put your ass against a jacuzzi jet, you can fill your ass up with water, and then when you squirt it out, it comes flying out about 400 miles an hour. It really seemed like a pretty funny thing to do back when. I mean, it was really a lot of entertainment. For those of you who have not seen water come out of an ass, Drew, you're a doctor. What kind of velocity? Nolan Ryan doesn't pitch that fast. I mean, that's a lot of velocity.

1:03:23 Drew Yeah, there can be quite a substantial pressure.

1:03:25 Adam Is it the colon or the abdomen or abdominal muscles or whatever it is? But you can shoot a grape, could fly out of there, put a hole in the man. I'm serious. So somebody figured this out, and I don't want to mention any names, but they figured out that this is some pretty interesting stuff.

1:03:46 Drew What did Ray do?

1:03:46 Adam And don't bring his name on. He re-listened to the show once in a while. So we thought it would be even funnier one day. This is back, I think, senior year in high school or maybe junior year. If he went ahead and filled up, and then we went over to the Jack-in-the-Box drive-thru. And wouldn't it be hilarious if instead of collecting the food or handing the money, Ray's ass hung out the window and just shot the steady stream of sewer water. At the at the guy was behind the counter now that sounded like a good time. So we filled them we filled them up and we didn't have a jacuzzi we weren't rich kids. We actually had to break into this club to use their jacuzzi. But not this time because it was too far away. And the thing about Drew as a doctor again chime in one can only hold a gallon and a half a watt of tap water. One's belly for such a such a period of time.

1:04:41 Drew It will expel at some point.

1:04:42 Adam It's coming out.

1:04:43 Drew Spontaneously.

1:04:43 Adam Yeah and the idea was that it didn't come out in the car.

1:04:47 Drew How far was the Jack in the Box?

1:04:48 Adam It's sort of like when those heroin mules fill up their bellies with the balloons filled with heroin and then they try to make it across into the country. Eventually if it sits in your stomach long enough the acid will eat it away. It's like the same theory except for no money involved.

1:05:04 Drew How far was the Jack in the Box?

1:05:05 Adam Nothing but pride baby. The Jack in the Box from my mother's house was approximately a half a mile.

1:05:14 Drew What did he use at your mother's house to fill up with?

1:05:16 Adam Hose.

1:05:16 Caller Oh.

1:05:20 Adam My mom was on vacation and she has like a hose bib just out in the front of her house, just sticking out, so under the cover of darkness. Filled up and head over to the Jack in the Box. Here's the big problem with this plan.

1:05:34 James Lesure You guys are good friends.

1:05:35 Adam Yeah, we slid him right into the car. Oh, I see. What do you think, we played a game of a pick up basketball before we went over the Jack in the Box? How did he walk? We provided a wheelchair. He could walk. He made his way to the car. He wasn't jogging, but we got him into the car. We carried him like Hannibal Lecter and so on and so on. I had a hand truck. I carted him around. He got in the car and we made our way to the Jack in the Box. Now, the problem in our planning was that we didn't have a pickup truck or a sport utility vehicle. We had a guy, 78 Celica. You know those cars where you can't even use the back seat? The problem is he wasn't driving the car. He didn't drive a stick. So his ass had to come over from the passenger side. The guy who was driving the car had to sort of lean his seat back while his ass went past him and out the window. But there was a little height problem because the Jack in the Box window was up a little higher than the vehicle.

1:06:34 James Lesure I'm kind of hungry, but go ahead.

1:06:35 Adam The guy, he will go out for some tacos after this. The guy behind, the poor 17 year old kid who is probably still telling the story and no one believes him. He is like a farmer that saw UFO. He probably just figured, I better just keep it to myself. He looked for a minute, he saw the ass sort of getting it in his cross hair, him in his cross hairs and he sort of looked at the ass for a second and he very slowly with a straight face just slid the window shut. There must be some policy. If ever a big ass comes out after the street lights are on, you go ahead and just shut that window. So he just shut the window thinking, what could it hurt? I'm sure he wasn't expecting what happened five seconds later, and then he was glad he reacted the way he did. He shut the window and my body just let loose. And it was like Moses parting the Red Sea. I mean, you've never seen that sort of volume. It was stupendous. And we didn't pick up our order naturally, and we just sped off. But the kid in the place never got hit with anything. He slid the window. Could you imagine what kind of therapy it would take? As it is, you're getting $2.65 an hour, and everyone's making fun of you because you're wearing a goofy hat, and the shoes you wore in your 9th grade graduation. Now to top that, you got a guy squirting water out of his ass. I'll tell you, in this day and age, you know what would have happened? The kid would have got a good attorney, and he would have sued Jack in the Box, right? For some sort of work related... They should have had some sort of sneeze guard, windscreen, some sort of device up there. Some sort of stool guard. That he was traumatized, couldn't go back to work, he had to collect that. Unemployment, disability, oh yes, there would be a loss.

1:08:34 Drew Those were the days when that was all getting started.

1:08:36 Adam Oh, back then. Those were the days.

1:08:38 Drew Remember the driver?

1:08:41 Adam He just leaned out of the way. He leaned back and the ass actually hung out of the window.

1:08:46 Drew I mean, Ray must be one of these guys from Momma Chaps or something.

1:08:48 Adam Well, don't mention his name.

1:08:49 Drew I mean, he was like in the spider position. How did he do that? He did the best he could. Not even in the car.

1:08:53 Adam A couple beers will loosen you up.

1:08:55 Caller Oh, for God's sake. All right.

1:08:56 James Lesure Oh, my God.

1:08:58 Adam All right. We're going to take ourselves a little break and we'll be back with more James Lesure. Hey, it's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew. James Lesure is here. For Your Love is the name of the sitcom. 9.30 Thursday nights on the WB. James, anything else you'd like to talk about? I mean, any movie projects? Any other ventures?

1:09:24 James Lesure No.

1:09:25 Adam Okay, good. Drew, any projects you're doing?

1:09:28 Drew No, but James, we got to think of something. He was going to launch another story like the one we just told. Go back to Matthew. You interrupt Matthew there.

1:09:35 Adam Oh, really?

1:09:35 Drew We got his question.

1:09:36 Adam What was he talking about?

1:09:37 Drew I don't know.

1:09:38 James Lesure Was that a one-time thing for you guys?

1:09:39 Drew Are you kidding?

1:09:40 James Lesure How do you resist not doing it?

1:09:41 Drew Oh, how is it you still don't do it, Adam?

1:09:46 Adam Listen, I'm scared that people are going to do this too.

1:09:50 Drew But a new sort of element in our college tour appearances here.

1:09:55 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:09:56 Drew You can get open with that.

1:09:58 Adam Yeah. Hey, I was just hanging out with Jim Rose last week in a sideshow.

1:10:02 Drew Oh, you could be a regular on that.

1:10:04 Adam I got to tell James a funny story about Jim Rose. I mentioned on the air a couple of weeks ago, but it's kind of funny. Who is that? Jim Rose is the guy who does those sideshows at Lollapalooza and stuff. He has guys like hanging bowling balls off their testicles and people eating glass. He gets like guys to cough up their own bile and other people to drink them, and there's like the human pin cushion. He has all these things. I'm not interested in the macabre and the bizarre. I don't like that. I'd like to see a nice mud wrestling contest. That to me is human exhibitionism. Big busted women fighting for money, but not guys hanging anvils off their nutsack. I don't need to see that. I want to see a guy whose nuts hurts. I'll go home and look in the mirror. I don't need to see a guy swinging the anvil on stage. But I'm sitting, so I'm with the band Korn. I'm in Sacramento. Jim Rose is there. I told the story before, so I'll make it quick. Jim Rose and I have taken, we've gotten off. We're at the back of the record store. They're in this big record store thing, in-store, and the crowds are nuts, and it's not even, we get a little quiet time, me and Jim, and we're sitting in the back. We're sitting on like a crate of Abba CDs or something, and we're just talking by the loading dock, and we're having a heart-to-heart. I say, Jim, I never met you, but you're not a young man anymore. You do this thing, you do these tours. He's telling me he fills these venues, 10,000 seats, 15,000 seat arenas. He charges 25 bucks a head. He makes all the money. He books the things himself. He plays 300 dates a year, so on and so forth. I say, James, when do you give it up? And when do you just buy that land in Montana and build a nice A-frame cabin and so on and so forth? Start a family. What about that? No, I just got a PO Box in Seattle. I'm a gypsy, I'm on the road. I say, what about a family, James? James, what about it? I mean, what about kids and a marriage, a wife? And he says, oh no, I travel with my wife. We've been together for eight years, had a great loving, nurturing relationship. She shoots fire out of her vagina and she travels with me everywhere we go. And he doesn't even bat an eye with the fire out of the vagina line. Now here's a good show. She flames up the afterburner vagina and one of my friends come in and puts it out. Squirts water right out of her ass and no flaming vagina. That's it. Oh, now that's a side show. Now that I would go to. Matthew.

1:12:44 Yeah.

1:12:44 Adam You're 17.

1:12:45 Drew So Matthew, we didn't get your question. What's the deal?

1:12:47 Yeah. I had a question and a comment. I had a comment for you, Drew, about the Clinton thing.

1:12:52 Drew Yeah.

1:12:52 If he can get away with this just by saying, oh, it was inappropriate touching, then that gives every other guy in the world the right to say it was inappropriate.

1:13:03 Drew Do you hear your friends saying that kind of stuff?

1:13:05 I actually heard my dad saying that.

1:13:07 Drew Oh, how interesting.

1:13:08 Adam That's nice.

1:13:09 Drew Interesting. In what context?

1:13:12 Well, if he can get away with sexual harassment.

1:13:14 Drew No, no, no, no. But I mean, do you actually hear your friends using that as an excuse when they get out of hand or mistreat somebody?

1:13:22 Caller Oh, no, no, no, no.

1:13:23 But we were just saying that could happen.

1:13:25 Drew Yeah. I'm just wondering, is it happening though?

1:13:28 Oh, I heard a couple of my friends saying something around the lines of that, like, oh, if Clinton can get away with it, then I can.

1:13:34 Adam That's the kind of thing I hear, is just sort of here's, you know, Well, either way, it's a boss banging an intern, which is always bad policy, especially when the boss is the commander in chief.

1:13:45 Yeah, don't get mixed up with people in work, especially if you're the president and you're married.

1:13:49 Drew What was your other deal?

1:13:51 Actually, I had a question about LSD. If you are taking a lot of it consistently and then you stop for a period of time, can it be a cause of depression?

1:14:03 Drew Absolutely. But you don't have to do it for a long period of time. You don't have to do it a very lot. It can even happen. You don't have to stop for this all to develop. The typical scenario is somebody who has used at least 30 or 40 times somewhere within 10 years of the last use, they'll develop severe depression. The depression will be indolent and persistent.

1:14:24 And I've also heard that you can take so many hits that you can actually be clinically insane. Is that true?

1:14:29 Drew Well, you can, I mean, that's a strange term, insane, but you can, yes, you can have substantial personality changes and have thought problems. And they really, it's a brain injury. What can you say?

1:14:39 Adam I miss that insane and people thinking they're Napoleon and that kind of stuff. Now everyone just kills and molests. I miss the old, like the, you know, the loony farm where they'd have the guy running and the guy chasing him with the big net.

1:14:51 James Lesure Right, right.

1:14:52 Adam And another guy walking around, he thought he was Abe Lincoln. That's, I miss those days.

1:14:56 James Lesure Characters, man.

1:14:57 Adam Now he's in there because he ate somebody. Squirted water out of his ass or something, something diabolical. All right. That's enough of Matthew. Jamie. Yeah. What's going on? You're 20.

1:15:11 Caller I just want to know about, huh?

1:15:15 Adam All right, baby. You're speaking in spurts. Slow down.

1:15:18 Caller Oh.

1:15:18 Adam You hurt my ear there.

1:15:19 Caller I'm sorry.

1:15:20 Adam That's all right.

1:15:21 Caller I just want to know if you take birth control, if marijuana affects it.

1:15:26 Drew I mean, it's effectiveness.

1:15:28 Caller Huh?

1:15:29 Drew Does it make it less effective?

1:15:30 Caller Yeah.

1:15:31 Drew I don't know that that is a fact.

1:15:33 Adam Well, it does because you forget to take it.

1:15:35 Drew Well, there's that certainly. Yeah.

1:15:38 Caller However, really.

1:15:39 Adam You're on PES for the last six months. You don't know.

1:15:42 Drew Just about anything can affect the pills. The pills affect any...

1:15:47 Adam The birth control is coming out of Popeye's mouth.

1:15:49 Drew That should be the first point. Any pharmacologic agent can potentially decrease the effectiveness of the pills. So you got to be careful.

1:15:55 Caller Okay.

1:15:55 Adam All right. But we're glad to hear you're on it.

1:15:57 Drew It's mostly about the antibiotics that are the issue.

1:15:58 Caller Yeah.

1:15:59 Adam Do you have any kids? Yep. Yeah. I heard mama.

1:16:02 Drew Right away?

1:16:03 Adam Yeah. Just heard mama.

1:16:04 Drew Two of them?

1:16:05 Caller I got one. One. All right.

1:16:06 Adam But that's enough, right?

1:16:07 Caller Yep.

1:16:08 Adam All right.

1:16:09 Caller No more.

1:16:10 Caller Good.

1:16:10 Adam That pot?

1:16:11 Caller Yep.

1:16:11 Adam Not in front of your kid?

1:16:13 Caller Nope.

1:16:13 Adam How old is your kid?

1:16:14 Caller Two and a half months.

1:16:15 Caller All right.

1:16:16 Adam Good. No more kids?

1:16:18 Caller Nope.

1:16:18 Adam Okay. Good. I can always hear when young women have a kid because they sound like old women. She was 20 years old.

1:16:25 James Lesure Sounded 40.

1:16:26 Adam Yeah. She's like seen it all, done it all. You know what I'm talking about?

1:16:31 Drew It's interesting.

1:16:32 Adam You knew she wasn't some junior in college. Do you know what I'm saying? She's not a lot of tailgating going on in Jamie's life. Do you get that feeling?

1:16:42 Caller Yeah.

1:16:44 Adam No mixers, never been pinned except for the time in the basement by her uncle. I mean, not a great, not wearing the, the leaves are changing. None of that going on. Just got a kid. Alright, scares me though when kids, you know, see, the thing that freaks me out about this show is, is when we talk to people that have, you know, like that last caller, 20 minutes, half hour, go ahead, the three kids, you know, we talked to this last caller, 20 years old, smoking weed. I look at them as a kid. It's like you're 20, you're smoking weed, you don't know the difference between birth control and hard candy. I look at skits. But the kid looks at them as not only an adult, but Jesus. I mean, that's all it is. Hey, when you're, when you're, you know, when you're under 10, hell, when you're two months, a mom is, that's light. That's the light at the end of the tunnel, man. That is, there's nothing else. That's it. Scary. Matt?

1:17:47 Caller Yeah.

1:17:47 Adam You're 19.

1:17:48 Caller Yep.

1:17:48 Adam What's going on?

1:17:50 Caller Nothing much. How about you guys?

1:17:51 Adam Just hanging out.

1:17:52 Caller Cool. I have a problem.

1:17:55 Adam Okay.

1:17:56 Caller I have been talking to some girl on the Internet for the last month, and I just went and met her last night, and we kind of messed around and had sex with her. Today, this afternoon, I went to the bathroom and it like stings, and I was wondering if you could contact something that fast.

1:18:17 Drew Absolutely.

1:18:19 Adam Really? Stings the next day?

1:18:20 Drew Stinging the next same day, sometimes.

1:18:23 James Lesure Really?

1:18:25 Adam What is that that stings that day?

1:18:26 Drew That's urethritis, and then almost any cause can be gonorrhea, non-gonococcal, chlamydia, they can all do that.

1:18:32 Adam Get it that day?

1:18:32 Drew Yeah.

1:18:33 Adam Ain't that a bitch?

1:18:34 Drew Yeah.

1:18:35 Caller Is there like any tests I can-

1:18:36 Adam Barely done high-fiving your buddies, and the penis hurts.

1:18:39 Drew You got to go see a doctor and let them take a look at things. They will give you some advice.

1:18:43 Adam Your hand is still red from all the high-fiving and phone dialing you've been doing over the last hour and a half and the penis is on fire.

1:18:51 James Lesure That's rough.

1:18:52 Adam You figure if you met her over the internet and nailed her the first night though.

1:18:56 James Lesure My buddy did that too. He just told me about it last week. Is that the new thing? Is that hot?

1:19:00 Adam It is when you're like Matt is. You didn't do a lot of dating before this?

1:19:07 Caller Not with her at all. I never even just met her.

1:19:09 Adam But in general?

1:19:11 Caller Oh yeah.

1:19:12 Adam You meet a lot of women?

1:19:14 Caller Yeah.

1:19:15 Adam You meet them through the internet?

1:19:16 Caller No.

1:19:18 Adam Why did you meet her over the internet?

1:19:19 Caller I don't know. I'm dumb.

1:19:20 Adam What did she look like?

1:19:22 Caller She was fat.

1:19:25 Adam It's so sad, but there's just something about that.

1:19:28 Caller I know.

1:19:29 James Lesure She was fat, Matt?

1:19:30 Caller Yeah.

1:19:31 Adam Yeah. Give us the weight discrepancy. What did she say? Tell us how she described herself over the internet, because I know you asked. And then describe her as you saw her nude.

1:19:46 Caller Well, she said she was pretty big, but not too big, but she was 350, I'd say.

1:19:52 Adam Oh, please. She was not.

1:19:54 Caller I swear to God.

1:19:55 Adam Your penis isn't that big.

1:19:57 Caller Exactly. It was hard.

1:20:00 Adam 350?

1:20:00 Caller Yeah.

1:20:02 Adam No.

1:20:02 Caller I swear to God.

1:20:04 Adam And what did she say? She was a scant 275? How big did she say she was?

1:20:11 Caller I wouldn't say she was 350, but she looked huge. She was huge.

1:20:15 Adam What did she say she was over the Internet?

1:20:18 Caller She said she was 250, 275 about that.

1:20:22 Adam You should get some kind of medal.

1:20:26 James Lesure Matt, you in there without a helmet though?

1:20:28 Caller It scared me to death.

1:20:30 Adam Matt, you sound kind of spindly too. What are you coming in at?

1:20:36 Caller I'm small. I'm like 130.

1:20:39 Adam Oh, please.

1:20:40 Caller I swear to God.

1:20:41 Adam This is the greatest visual ever.

1:20:43 Caller No, it's scary.

1:20:44 Adam Matt, did you plant a flag in her belly button and claim it for your native land?

1:20:50 Caller I didn't know where I was.

1:20:52 Adam Oh, my God. Please. Matt, you like big women?

1:20:57 Caller No.

1:20:57 Adam No?

1:20:58 Caller No.

1:20:59 Adam All right. Hold on a second.

1:21:00 James Lesure Matt is even 19.

1:21:01 Adam Matt, Matt's like 11. Please. 275, 350. Go for the Internet.

1:21:10 James Lesure You think it was his first time?

1:21:11 Adam I could tell by...

1:21:12 Drew I think he's full of ass.

1:21:13 Adam He's full of crap. But I could tell by Matt's sort of adolescent voice that he wasn't a guy who got laid a lot. And I said to him, now, at first, it all fit with the computer. Here's a guy who doesn't meet chicks. He's a computer nerd, so he met a chick over the computer. I understand that. OK, she's a big gal. I understand why she's on the computer. But the thing that started to worry me or made me suspicious when I said, have you been with a lot of women? Have you dated a lot? And he said, oh, yeah. In that in that in that great in that Bobby Brady, your Brady voice is cracking episode voice. You know what I'm talking about? Who's Matt Kidd? He never been late. Hey, Matt. Yeah. What year were you born? All right. He must have thought about that.

1:22:00 Caller I have not. No, I've been dating a girl for a year and a half. And she was like skinny and we broke up.

1:22:08 Adam Yeah. You haven't had a lot of dates since then, though, right?

1:22:12 Caller No.

1:22:13 Adam You don't meet women real easily.

1:22:16 Caller I'm more shy.

1:22:17 Adam Yeah. You're kind of nerdy, right?

1:22:18 Caller No, I wouldn't say that.

1:22:19 Adam Well, listen, Bill Gates is a nerd. You know? So wouldn't you say you're kind of nerdy?

1:22:23 Caller Well, I don't get on the computer that much.

1:22:26 Adam Yeah. Well, maybe you got on the computer a little more and got off the fat one. Your penis wouldn't hurt so much. All right, Matt. Go look up home urethritis recipes on Yannick. No, no, no, no, no, no.

1:22:40 Drew Go see the doctor. All right. Look, the urethritis is highly treatable. So...

1:22:45 Adam And what do they do?

1:22:46 Drew Antibiotics.

1:22:47 Adam Where?

1:22:48 Drew Sometimes in your ear, but generally they can do with oral medication these days, and it's important to go quickly because these infections can get into the testes, and it gives the epididymis, and the prostate, and they can cause strictures and things, and so on.

1:22:58 Adam They don't have to swab it out?

1:23:01 Drew Sometimes, depending on what's available.

1:23:02 Adam I've heard some stories.

1:23:03 Drew Yeah, there are newer ways to do it, but yeah, there's a swab thing.

1:23:07 Adam What do they do? Do they get a culture or something?

1:23:09 Drew Yeah. Yeah.

1:23:10 Adam They couldn't just take your word for it that your penis is killing you?

1:23:12 Drew They can do that, and then sometimes they'll just empirically treat it with antibiotics.

1:23:16 Adam That's great. Hey, doc, my penis is killing me. Hold on. Let me hold your penis for some forceps while I go, when I plunge it like a cannon barrel.

1:23:23 Drew Yes. There's that technique, too.

1:23:25 Adam James, you ever had that done?

1:23:26 James Lesure No, man.

1:23:27 Adam I got to say-

1:23:28 Drew You either, Adam, huh?

1:23:29 Adam No, never had it done. I got to tell you, this is one of the bright spots of not getting laid much, especially when I was young, is no venereal diseases.

1:23:40 James Lesure No doubt.

1:23:41 Adam And one time I got the yeast infection on my pepe. I went to some lesbian clinic in Santa Monica. That was kind of a nightmare. But other than that, no problems.

1:23:52 Drew Great.

1:23:52 Adam Great. James Lesure is our guest. There he is.

1:24:23 James Lesure Hey, everybody. Hey, LA.

1:24:24 Adam For Your Love is the name of the sitcom, WB, Thursday Nights, 9.30.

1:24:30 James Lesure Hot show, you guys gotta watch.

1:24:32 Adam Those of you who watched it on NBC, make sure and make the switch. And I guess it'd be nice if you could take your fan base from NBC, bring them over to WB, and then pick up a few more at the WB. Chris.

1:24:51 Yeah.

1:24:51 Adam You're 17.

1:24:52 Caller Yeah. Hi.

1:24:53 Drew Dr. Drew?

1:24:54 Caller Yeah. A while ago, my doctor put me on Claritin because I was like...

1:25:00 Drew You have allergies.

1:25:01 Caller Yeah. I have pretty bad allergies. And that didn't work for a while, but then it stopped working. So then they put me on Allegra.

1:25:08 Caller Yeah. It's a little better.

1:25:09 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Well, it makes my stomach upset really badly.

1:25:14 Drew You're on Allegra D or Allegra?

1:25:16 Caller I think I'm on Allegra D.

1:25:18 Drew Try switching to Allegra. Okay.

1:25:20 Caller Okay.

1:25:20 Drew That's it.

1:25:21 Caller Okay. Oh, and Dr. Drew?

1:25:22 Drew Yeah.

1:25:23 Caller I know this Claritin thing has been kind of beaten to death.

1:25:25 Drew No. Tonight, I want to beat it to death because I want some ammunition to go into OVRA with, so you tell me. Okay.

1:25:31 Caller Well, you see, here's the thing. Before this whole Lewinsky thing came out, I mean, Clinton was a good president. I mean, his policies and everything were all pretty good.

1:25:39 Drew Yeah.

1:25:40 Caller And now he can't do his job.

1:25:42 Drew I mean, I want to stay away from the politics of this if we can. Just talk about how it impacts on your health, you know what I'm saying, on your sort of culture.

1:25:52 Caller Well, okay. Well, then, how about every time I turn on the news and look in a newspaper? I mean, we have this whole economic crisis going on, and I can't help but see Monica Lewinsky's face all over the newspaper. It really gets, I mean, we have bigger problems to deal with.

1:26:06 Adam We got bigger fish to fry.

1:26:08 Caller Exactly.

1:26:08 Adam Thank God it's all been sort of counterbalanced by Mark McGwire, hit his home runs. It couldn't have been better timing. I'm sure Clinton just couldn't be happier. Here's this guy smacking some home runs, and everyone is sort of, you can feel yourself being pulled away from Clinton and heading over to McGwire. It's kind of funny. And it's really, in a day and age where everything is just atrocities and scandal, it's so nice to see some big husky guy hugging his kid and smacking home runs.

1:26:40 Drew Even that's not without its controversy, that whole creatine thing. And DHEA or Anderson Dyer, where the hell is he taking?

1:26:47 Adam I'll tell you, when I saw, I swear to God, I got home today at about 6 15, 6 o'clock in the evening. I sat around and did nothing for about 20 minutes. I went upstairs to take a little nap. I decided I'd better go number two before I took the nap. I was sitting on the pot in my bedroom, not in the bathroom, just the toilet that I had installed right in the middle of the bedroom. I was thinking to myself, hey, jeez, isn't that St. Louis game? Yeah, they're playing the Cubs. That's on tonight. I think that's on. I wiped my ass. I got up and I turned the TV on. I swear to God, I flipped the TV on and it was, it's Mark McGwire heading toward home plate, his last bat up. He grounded out and Mark steps in and there's the pitch.

1:27:33 Caller Home run! He's got it!

1:27:34 Adam He hit another one? He broke the record today. He broke the record. I swear to God, I didn't think about it all day. I just got up off the toilet, turned the TV on and within 12 seconds from when the TV turned on, he smacked his home run. He was running around the bases. The place was going nuts. Sammy Sosa came in. There's high fives everywhere. He picks his kid up and he's holding him over his head at home plate and I said, I got to kick my dad in the nuts next time I see him. Can you imagine? I was 10 years old. My dad was reading a book on the lawn. He swung the sprinkler key at the neighbor's dog once. It's the most athletic thing I'd ever seen him do. I thought to myself, this kid, this lucky son of a bitch, he has this big behemoth of his dad. He's, imagine the kid. Forget about McGwire. The kid is a kid. I mean, his kid, he's old enough to drink it all in. He must be 10, 11 years old. I mean, certainly he's in school and he's wearing the uniform. Does everybody on that field have to wear the uniform? You got a 9-year-old kid who's sporting the uniform. You got a 45-year-old manager with prostate cancer. He's got the uniform on. Everybody's got the uniform on. But the point is, he's holding the kid above his head at home plate. Fireworks are going off. Of course, because it's in St. Louis, the crowd is erupted. They're going insane. And I thought to myself, what a bizarre reality. This must be for you. For the kid. Yeah, there you are. First off, you're nine feet off the ground over home plate. You're looking down. Above you is just waves of fans going nuts and fireworks. Below you is everybody in major leagues and the audience is all the greats and all the past greats. You know what I mean? You're just being held up there for all to see.

1:29:20 James Lesure What a trip.

1:29:21 Adam I swear to God we're going to get that. That kid's going to get a talk show. That's how Hollywood will do that. Magic, you're out. We got McGwire's kid in. What do you mean? He's a sports legend. Magic, how many homers you hit? All right. Enough said. McGwire's kid in there. He's got a high-cume. People know who he is. We did some audience testing. Turns out George Stephanopoulos, they know the kid more than him. We're putting the kid in. We'll give him a stint on Fox. All right. Mara?

1:29:54 Yeah.

1:29:55 Adam You're 21.

1:29:56 Caller Yeah.

1:29:56 Caller What's going on?

1:29:58 Caller Well, okay, I've been seeing someone for about three years now. Well, actually three years last month. And I moved here about five months ago. And I mean, before then I was so like, you know, I never dreamed of like thinking about another person.

1:30:18 Adam I was like, just, you know, I get to the part where you're cheating.

1:30:24 Caller Yeah. Well, I'm not cheating. I'm thinking about it.

1:30:28 James Lesure My show came on. You know how it goes.

1:30:31 Adam And you're hot for James, are you?

1:30:33 Caller No.

1:30:35 Caller Oh, sorry.

1:30:36 James Lesure Thanks.

1:30:37 Adam He's like the black Ronnie Dangerfield. If you show him some respect.

1:30:43 Drew What's your question here?

1:30:45 Caller Oh, here my question is, you know, I thought I was in love. I mean, I feel like I am. To this day, I'm, you know, if he was here, I'd be with him. But I'm thinking about other things and I don't know, you know, does that mean I don't love him? Does that mean I'm making a mistake?

1:31:02 Adam How far away is your boyfriend?

1:31:04 Caller Las Vegas. I'm living in Santa Monica. It's about four or five hours.

1:31:08 Drew How long have you been gone?

1:31:10 Caller Five months. I saw him last month on our anniversary. And I talk to him daily.

1:31:15 Drew You know what? A relationship in order to be maintained, needs maintenance.

1:31:20 Adam What's he doing in Vegas?

1:31:23 Caller Nothing.

1:31:23 Adam Seriously.

1:31:24 Caller See, that's why I came down here. I came down because I was sick of doing nothing. I wanted to go to school. I just started school.

1:31:31 Adam He's doing nothing in Vegas.

1:31:32 Drew This relationship is changing. You may actually have loved him, but love is not always eternal and relationships change, especially at your age. You may be seeing things in him as you grow in your direction, as you mature and become more competent. You may see things in him. You have grown.

1:31:48 Adam The whole reason you're apart.

1:31:49 Caller I can't grow love, though. I feel like I'm just giving up if I...

1:31:55 Adam Listen, I had a bike I loved when I was a kid. I don't know where that thing is.

1:31:59 Drew You will love again.

1:32:00 Adam I never think about it.

1:32:01 Drew And it will be a better relationship.

1:32:02 Adam I think that bike is humping someone else's bike.

1:32:04 Drew Just because you love somebody doesn't mean it's a good or healthy relationship or good for you.

1:32:08 Adam It's drunk, it's humping a Keno girl at Circus Circus.

1:32:11 Drew You're 21.

1:32:13 Adam Well, I forget about this notion of love you have. Listen, people are always talking about unconditional. Love's conditional. The person that you're with can't be a junkie. They have to be employed. They have to respect you. They can't respect you. There's all kinds of conditions. If you got somebody who just wants to basically just gather moss on their ass while they sit in Las Vegas, she outgrew them five months ago. She picked up, she packed up, and she went out to do something.

1:32:43 James Lesure Right? Yeah.

1:32:44 Adam That's when the relationship ended. Okay. But everyone knows. I mean, James, you were in relationships when you were younger.

1:32:51 Caller Yeah.

1:32:51 Adam You thought they'd never end. Right. What a tragedy.

1:32:54 Caller Tough one, man.

1:32:55 James Lesure Bullet to bite, yeah. But you get over it.

1:32:57 Adam Yeah. And remember this thought? I can't picture them with someone else and me with someone else. How, like, when you're 18, 19, 17, 22, 24, whatever it is, the idea that they're going to marry somebody else, have kids with somebody else, whatever, it seems like it's almost unthinkable.

1:33:17 Drew All the friendships you develop with other people.

1:33:20 Adam Yeah. What about all their friends? Then you have about 10 of those and you go, oh, okay. But my friends have gotten to speech so many times, they're not going to listen anymore. But here's the thing too, a quick message to the friends, don't start talking crap immediately after the breakup.

1:33:35 Drew Because they get back together. Yeah.

1:33:37 Adam Here's what happens, Drew dumps his wife and then he comes in and shows us, I got some bad news, me and Susan broke up and then I immediately start in, oh, thank God.

1:33:45 James Lesure Yeah, right.

1:33:46 Adam She was like a ball and chain around. Man, she was holding you down and you were drowning in the deep end. That crazy broad, she came on to me once and she was all coked up. And then he comes back and the next day we got back together and we worked it out.

1:33:59 Caller You A-hole.

1:34:00 Adam She's beautiful. Oh, she's beautiful. I wish you guys the best. They don't start talking smack until at least a month after they broke up.

1:34:07 Caller Right.

1:34:08 Adam It's everyone's instinct to start talking about how horrible the person they dumped was. Right. All right. We'll take a break.

1:34:19 Caller This has been Loveline. The views expressed on Loveline are not necessarily those of the staff, the management, or the sponsors of this radio station. And are probably not the views of Westwood One Entertainment. Loveline is produced by Ann Wilkins Engel. Now, please listen to this station longer.

Episode Feedback

Tuesday, September 8, 1998