Episode 1000754887920

6:25 Voiceover Now, here's Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191 with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

6:31 What are you in there?

6:34 Adam Eep, it is the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-L-A-V-E-191, fax number 310-854-4455. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and addiction specialist, medicine, whatever. Had a couple of beers over, watched the Kings game tonight. Got to go in one of those luxury boxes. You smell anything? No, less than usual. I ate 40 pounds of hot dogs to cover it up. I even keistered a few just to play it safe.

7:04 Drew Is that staples?

7:05 Adam Yeah.

7:06 Drew Nice, huh?

7:07 Adam Yeah, yeah, it's nice. All right, so Kings were up 3-0 when I left and that was that. Our guest tonight is Oleander. We have Thomas Flowers and Doug Eldridge, both from the band coincidentally enough. They got themselves a CD out and it's about to go gold, I was told. What does that mean? You guys know what that means?

7:27 Oleander Going gold means you have the opportunity to go platinum. Going platinum means you get the opportunity by your grandfather in your house.

7:33 That was curiously vague.

7:34 Adam Do you, but what is about to go gold?

7:37 Oleander Dude, I don't know, man. I just keep getting in the bus.

7:40 Adam February Sun is the name of the CD. Again, and this is two nights in a row, we have a band on here that we've been hearing a bumper from.

7:49 Oh, really?

7:50 Drew Forever.

7:51 Adam Forever. As a matter of fact, I'm so Pavlovian in my training that when I heard the beginning of the song, I just thought it was time we're just coming back from a commercial.

8:00 Drew So you're talking, we spent the afternoon again together today.

8:03 Adam Oh, yes. Family Guy. Yeah, Drew and I did an episode of the Family Guy, which is a show I really enjoy. Actually, we did about 10 seconds of an episode of Family Guy.

8:12 Drew Thanks for that direction, though, too. I appreciate it.

8:14 Adam True. It's the world's worst actor, everybody. I don't know if people listening to the show realize just how little ability you actually have. Well, actually, they should have a pretty good idea if they listen to the show.

8:24 Drew What do you think?

8:25 Adam With any regularity. Oleander is, you guys, are you touring with Creed and Our Lady Peace currently?

8:32 Oleander We just finished it up.

8:33 Adam Or just finished?

8:34 Oleander It's on Sunday.

8:36 Yeah, just wrapped it up.

8:38 Adam We just had Our Lady Peace, I think, was in here last week, I believe.

8:42 Oleander Great guys, man.

8:43 Yeah.

8:44 Adam And Godsmack was just in here last night. And your guy was just telling me that you guys were at Woodstock, too. We were just talking to Godsmack about that. How was that?

8:55 Oleander That was awesome. I mean, you know, we got to open up the West stage. James Brown on the East side opening up for us. I mean, it's pretty cool, you know, you got the Godfather Soul going on. Then we get to go on. It doesn't get bigger than Woodstock, you know. And, uh, or stinkier.

9:10 Adam Yeah. Did it smell a little bit?

9:12 Oleander Well, by the end of the day, yeah, you know, by the end of the third day.

9:16 Adam How do you get in and out of that place? I mean, as an act. I mean, how do you get to the stage and then how do you get to your hotel?

9:24 Oleander Well, our hotel was a 45 square foot roaming bus that got in easily on Friday and stayed stationary until we left.

9:31 Adam So it wasn't like you have to take a helicopter out of like Hanoi or something.

9:35 Oleander Not for an almost going gold band. No, no, that's the difference. Maybe we've just defined what an almost going gold band is.

9:42 Adam I think we ought to hear something from Oleander because and I think we ought to hear the song of the bumper that I was talking about. What the hell? What's the name of that song?

9:52 Drew Is that Why I'm Here?

9:54 Adam Yes, that is. Oh, it's on the board there. Well, just, you know, I want everyone to know that I do this show without any preparation and without actually focusing or concentrating either. Drew, there's things on that screen that tell me what I should be doing. I don't even look at them, do I?

10:08 Drew Even if you did, it wouldn't matter.

10:09 Adam It wouldn't register because of my reading disability. All right. This is then Oleander off of February Sun. And this is Why I'm Here.

14:05 Oleander You know, that that almost sounds like, you know, a regular crowd at the shows.

14:10 Adam Sort of.

14:12 Oleander Of course, they're plotting for Creed in RLAD.

14:13 Adam Peace, but, you know, hey, it's Oleander unplugged. It's basically what that sound like there. Thomas and Doug are both here from Oleander. And I think we'll take some calls. Drew. Yep. Yep. John.

14:29 Yes.

14:30 Adam You're 22. What's up?

14:31 Caller Yes, I am. Oh, first off, I just want to say, how the hell are you guys? You guys got a great show. I listen to you all the time.

14:37 Adam Thanks.

14:38 Caller And first thing I want to say, well, I want to learn how to shoot. You know how like in the porno movies, how the guys are like able to like shoot the sperm like so far, like maybe five to 10 inches or something like that. I've never been able to do that. All it does is just gurgle out. And I'm wondering if if it's like something that you're just born with.

14:55 Oleander Build up and clinch.

14:57 Adam What's that? Yeah. Hey, John. Yeah. So you don't you don't get any distance.

15:05 Caller No, but you know, it's just and I and I do the best I can. Like, you know, like I'll try to go for as long as I can. You know, I've been able to hold on to it for like an hour and a half.

15:14 Adam And right.

15:14 Caller So it doesn't come shooting out.

15:16 Adam So you're saying if you're standing up, you can barely hit the carpet.

15:21 Caller Oh, no, it'll fall down onto the carpet.

15:23 Adam Right. Eventually.

15:24 Caller But you know what I'm talking about?

15:26 Adam Like you've seen sometimes it'll freeze up like a stalactite, right? Before it gets there. No.

15:32 Caller Do I have hobbies? Yeah, I have many hobbies. All right.

15:35 Drew Focus on those.

15:36 Caller No, no, no.

15:37 Drew Yeah, yeah, yeah.

15:37 Adam John, please. John, this is... Let me explain something.

15:41 Caller Sure.

15:41 Adam OK. There's certain things in life. Vertical leap, for instance, 40 times. These are all things that are worth proving. No, no. Things that can't be improved on much. Oh, no, no.

15:52 Caller I see.

15:52 Adam You see what I'm saying?

15:53 Caller I see.

15:54 Adam Here's the deal. You're dealt a certain hand by the Almighty. And like I said, there's some guys have a vertical leap of 35 inches. They're 5'9, and they can dunk a basketball. And then there's guys that are 6'4, and they can't touch the rim because they have a vertical leap of 13 inches. If the guy worked out real hard for five years, he could add an inch and a quarter to that, but still nothing.

16:17 Drew Right.

16:17 Adam That's the same way with sperm production and distance. These guys are in movies because that's why they're there, because of the distance. As a matter of fact, they actually have a little calibrated chart, and that's how they figure out.

16:31 Drew A little competition.

16:32 Adam That's right. They go for distance. Got the stripes stirred on. Blowing a whistle.

16:37 Oleander I gotta say, for a quantity and sheer shot distance, Peter North's got it down.

16:43 Adam That's why they call him the decorator. Drew doesn't watch enough porn to know what we're talking about.

16:49 Drew It's disgusting.

16:50 Adam Any band worth their weight in salt that's spent enough time in a bus on the road knows Peter North's work. What else are you going to do? I wouldn't even get off to play. I'd just stay on the bus.

17:01 Oleander And Ace Nin.

17:02 Adam Natalie.

17:03 Huh?

17:04 Adam Natalie.

17:04 Hi.

17:05 Adam You're 15. What's up? No. He dislikes you. That's different.

17:08 Caller Okay.

17:09 Oleander I can take that.

17:09 Caller Hey, Oleander. I've seen you guys three times last year up in Sacramento. You guys put on a really good show.

17:16 Adam Oleander, right?

17:17 Caller Yeah.

17:17 Caller All right. Wow.

17:18 Oleander Thank you.

17:18 Caller That's good.

17:19 Caller Yeah.

17:19 Adam That's their hometown.

17:20 Oleander Thank you very much.

17:20 Caller Absolutely.

17:21 Oleander How old are you?

17:22 Caller I'm 15.

17:23 Caller Wow.

17:24 Adam You sound even younger.

17:25 Caller I'm really small.

17:26 Adam Oh, okay.

17:27 Caller Yeah. I don't look like I'm 15 either. Like a patch of 12 made with the oldest.

17:31 Adam That's good. Especially when you turn 18.

17:34 Caller Okay. Whatever.

17:35 Oleander Thank you very much.

17:36 Caller Okay. I have basically two questions. My first one is a friend of mine. I've known her for about 10 years. The past three weeks, she's been talking a lot about, like, suicide and she doesn't really want to go on. She doesn't think anyone likes her anymore. I guess her parents are fighting now.

17:53 Drew Well, you got to tell somebody about this because...

17:56 Caller Yeah. And I was wondering, do you guys have, like, any phone numbers that I could have to, like, give to her so she could talk to people?

18:01 Adam Do you have a pad and pencil there, Natalie?

18:04 Caller No, I haven't.

18:04 Adam You do? All right.

18:05 Drew I've got probably three numbers for you, all right?

18:08 Adam Give her the shortest one.

18:09 Drew Okay. There's 1-800-SUICIDE. Oh, that's nice. There's 1-800-422.

18:19 Caller Hold on. 1-800-422.

18:21 Drew 4453.

18:22 Caller 4453.

18:23 Adam That's plenty, Drew.

18:24 Drew All right. Okay.

18:26 Caller And the second question was, a friend of mine, he told me that when he's limp, his penis is straight, but when it's erect, it curves towards the tip.

18:35 Adam Yeah.

18:36 Caller Is that, like, possible?

18:37 Adam Makes a hook. Yeah, it's good. And, you know, like, if you get locked out of your car, you drop that right in the crank, you know, like a coat hanger.

18:45 Yeah.

18:50 Caller We're losing you.

18:51 Adam Oh, boy.

18:51 Drew Boy, you disturbed her so thoroughly.

18:53 Adam Yeah.

18:54 Drew Anyway, the curvature, right at the tip, is most often caused by the circumcision, actually. But curves in other areas along the shaft are just sort of one of those things.

19:05 Adam Yeah. That's all right. And the only time you have to go and see a doctor is if there's some pain, right?

19:10 Drew Pain or difficulty with function.

19:12 Adam Right. My penis is perfectly straight, by the way. I just want to put that down for the record.

19:17 Drew I used it as a plumb line when you were a carpenter.

19:19 Adam That's right. Yeah. Well, I'd use it as a straight edge if I was like undercutting a door or something like that.

19:25 Caller Of course.

19:25 Adam I couldn't get one full cut out of it. I had to keep doubling it down.

19:29 Caller Of course.

19:29 Adam Sarah?

19:30 Yeah.

19:31 Adam You're 19?

19:32 Caller Yeah.

19:32 Adam What's up?

19:33 Caller Okay. I'm bisexual and I've been with my girlfriend about nine months now.

19:39 Adam Yeah.

19:40 Caller Well, okay. I've been getting like contact with my ex-boyfriend right now. And technically I'm still a virgin. I've never had an intercourse with a man before.

19:50 Drew And technically.

19:52 Caller Yeah.

19:52 Drew Well, technically.

19:54 Adam What does that mean? He just put his balls in you or something?

20:02 Caller Anyway, I'm kind of feeling that I do want to have an intercourse with him.

20:06 Adam Right.

20:07 Caller But I'm not real sure.

20:09 Drew All right.

20:10 Adam So you're bisexual, but you've never had an intercourse with a man.

20:14 Drew Do you have a girlfriend now?

20:15 Caller Yeah, I do.

20:17 Drew So you're talking about cheating? I guess. I don't. Bisexuals reserve the right to consider sexual encounters with another sex. So not cheating. Just sort of practicing their bisexuality.

20:29 Adam It's like having a dual citizenship.

20:31 Oleander Yeah.

20:33 Adam You can go to the other country and it's not like you're a traitor or anything.

20:36 Drew Or you're relinquishing the citizenship with the other.

20:38 Adam You got two passports. Sarah, I'm tempted to gamble on Sarah. She's a virgin. It's strange. Let's hold on a second, Sarah. We haven't done any gambling in a while. Let's try this.

20:51 Drew It's going to be hard.

20:52 Adam Why?

20:53 Drew Oh, I don't have a clear. She's a virgin.

20:56 Adam Yeah, but she may be a virgin because something horrible was done to her by a man.

21:04 Drew I think I got something.

21:05 Adam You got something?

21:05 Drew Maybe.

21:06 Adam Thomas, Doug, you guys got a dollar? You got any money?

21:09 Oleander I got some money.

21:10 Drew I'm good.

21:10 Oleander I'm pretty sure.

21:11 Adam Oh, Jesus Christ. I left my wallet in the car.

21:13 Oleander Oh, I got you covered.

21:14 Adam You got a dollar? Okay. We haven't gambled in a long time on the show. I got eight bucks. No, just put two out there. Just one for me and one for you. It's more of a token thing.

21:25 Oleander Here's my one and your one.

21:26 Adam All right. Here's how the game works. It's been a while and I'm not getting anything real clear cut out of Sarah, but Sarah's 19. Sarah's technically a virgin. She wants to go back with her old boyfriend. She's bisexual. She's living with a girl and she's kind of seems kind of depressed to me. Now, here's where we gambled. What was her past like? Not her past, but how did she grow up? What were parents doing? Were they alcoholics? Is there any abuse? Maybe everything was perfect. That's not a bad bet sometimes. Parents still together, love her very much. No physical or sexual abuse. But you could also go the abuse route. So I'm going to get started just to set an example here. I'm going to go with... It's tough because sexual abuse and her being a virgin doesn't really work. But on the other hand, maybe she hates men, but she said, bisexual, this is tough. I'm going with some sexual abuse by a man. Male sexual abuse, and she doesn't like men because of that. It's turned her to women. Okay, go next.

22:37 Drew Something weird in the family, like either some violence in there or somebody died or something, some source of like a flare of chaos around the age of...

22:46 Adam More specific, please.

22:48 Drew All right, dad and mom got in like violent fights.

22:52 Adam Violent fights.

22:54 Drew She got sort of victimized by a peer, female.

22:59 Adam Sexually.

23:00 Drew Female.

23:00 Adam Interesting.

23:01 Drew Age eight.

23:02 Adam Age eight, wow, that is specific. Thomas?

23:05 Oleander Wow, you guys get really deep with this stuff, man.

23:07 Adam Well, you guys are in a band, so we'll give you a little whiner. Li-Wei, yeah.

23:11 Oleander I'm going to say she went and saw a band play one night. One of the band guys got a little funky with one of her friends, a male guy in a band got funky with one of her friends.

23:20 Adam But at six years old.

23:21 Drew Has that before there.

23:22 Adam We're going way back.

23:23 Oleander Okay.

23:23 Adam You got to go to the origin here.

23:24 Oleander Okay. Okay.

23:25 Adam Not bad though with the band idea.

23:27 Oleander He blew my idea.

23:28 Adam Well, listen.

23:29 Oleander I'm going to say she was attracted to women from the get-go. She heard the horror stories. She never went there herself. She was a little bit freaked about it.

23:36 Adam Nothing specific.

23:37 Oleander Nothing specific.

23:39 Adam No alcoholism or physical abuse or anything like that.

23:42 Oleander Who doesn't have that in their family?

23:42 Adam Well, then that may be a bet. You may want to go with the alcoholism.

23:47 Oleander I'm going to go with everything was cool. She just dug women in and she's coming out.

23:50 Adam I'll tell you why it's not a bad bet either. Because sometimes they'll lie and they'll just say everything was fine. See what I'm saying?

23:55 Oleander Okay.

23:56 Adam In which case you went on a technicality. All right, Doug.

23:59 Caller Okay. So what happens here if I'm going along the lines of a pretty stable environment, home environment?

24:07 Adam Well, now Thomas has that.

24:08 Caller I know. That's the problem here.

24:09 Adam I'd go alcohol if I were you.

24:11 Caller Going alcohol?

24:12 Adam It's a safe bet.

24:13 Caller All right.

24:14 Adam Thomas, you got steady, you got everything was fine, right?

24:17 Oleander I got everything was fine.

24:18 Adam Okay.

24:19 Oleander I got everything was status quo.

24:20 Adam Doug, go alcohol.

24:21 Oleander Alcohol.

24:22 Adam It's an easy buck.

24:23 Oleander Easy buck?

24:23 Adam Yeah. It's really the smart money's on Boos.

24:25 Oleander But I lose too because I bought.

24:27 Adam I'll go out to the car during the break. I'll give you guys, I'll plug the record a few extra times. It's like 50 cents a plug. I think it is. Was it? Am I up 75 now? Sarah?

24:37 Caller Yeah.

24:37 Adam All right. Let's talk about the past.

24:40 Caller Okay. Well, I never met my father. And I basically live with my grandparents all my life. Like seven.

24:49 Adam Now, where'd your mom go?

24:53 Caller My mom was, um, well, she used a lot of drugs a lot. And my aunt took me in.

25:02 Adam So I'd say Doug's sort of the front runner.

25:04 Caller Are we talking alcohol here?

25:06 Drew Drugs, alcohol, same.

25:07 Adam We'll combine the categories.

25:08 Caller All right.

25:08 Oleander I just lost two bucks.

25:10 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

25:11 Adam Thomas, you were out in like the first three syllables. So, uh, I'll give you your buck back though, finally.

25:17 Oleander Just play my song, play two extra songs.

25:19 Adam All right. That sounds fair. If it sets the song. Hey, all right. So Sarah, and you live, you're raised by your aunt?

25:25 Drew Grandparents.

25:25 Adam Well, she said grandparents and she said her aunt.

25:27 Caller Yeah, my grandparents and my aunt.

25:29 Adam Okay.

25:30 Caller Yeah.

25:31 Drew So all hell broke loose when you were about seven, eight?

25:33 Yeah, basically seven.

25:36 Adam What hell broke loose at seven or eight?

25:40 Well, I don't know.

25:42 Caller She was just really into drugs.

25:44 Adam Your mom?

25:45 Caller Yeah.

25:45 Adam All right. So she got too into drugs when you're about seven.

25:48 Caller Yeah.

25:49 Adam And you went over and live with your grandparents.

25:51 Drew Were you exposed to some violence in the home?

25:53 Adam Were you doing anything for a buck?

25:55 Drew No.

25:55 Caller It was just I was popping on the streets with my grandparents, my aunt.

26:00 Adam On the streets with your grandparents and your aunt?

26:02 Caller Well, I was on the streets. And, you know, I go with my grandparents and my aunt off and on.

26:08 Adam Any sexual abuse?

26:10 Caller No.

26:11 Drew Huh?

26:11 Caller No.

26:12 Drew No.

26:13 Drew Any messing around with kids your own age?

26:14 Adam I'm really disappointed by that. No peer-related sex?

26:21 Caller Nuh-uh.

26:22 Drew Huh? When was the first time you were with a woman? A girl?

26:26 Caller I think when I was 16.

26:28 Drew Did you mess around at all before that?

26:31 Caller Nuh-uh.

26:33 Drew Wait a minute.

26:34 Adam I don't buy that. Sarah, what's up? Seriously. Either you did or you didn't. It sounds like you did. Now, did you?

26:40 Caller Did I what?

26:41 Adam Mess around. Any female contact when you were younger?

26:45 Caller No.

26:46 Adam No. So 16 was the first time?

26:48 Caller Yeah.

26:48 Adam Okay. How come you sound so tentative about it? I mean, do you just sound that way about everything?

26:54 Caller Yeah.

26:54 Adam Okay. Even about answering that question. You know, we talk to people and I'll go like, when did you lose your virginity? And I'll go 16. I'll go anything before that? And they go, no, not really. And then you go, what, something before that? No. Not technically. Well, then why don't you just say no, you idiots. All right, Sarah. All right. So it's just pretty much mom is out of control, alcoholic or drug addict. You were raised by grandparents.

27:24 Drew I can't believe you were on the streets and nobody ever did anything weird or sexually inappropriate with you.

27:32 Adam Sarah, why don't you just come clean with us? Come on. There's a buck out here for Drew. He's already spent it. Come on, seriously.

27:40 Oleander No. Sarah, if nothing happened to you, you don't have to say anything other than that. Don't egg these guys on. They're just professionals.

27:46 Adam All right. So nothing at all then, Sarah. You were just out on the street.

27:51 Caller Well, sometimes.

27:53 Adam What were you doing out on the street? I have frustration. I have frustration, man. Sarah, seriously, would you come clean with us?

28:02 Caller I'm coming clean.

28:04 Adam What happened out on the street?

28:06 Caller All right.

28:06 Adam Well, then stop sighing so deeply every time we bring it up. Okay?

28:13 Caller Okay.

28:16 Caller Okay.

28:17 Adam So you're out on the street, nothing happened, right? Okay. All right. Well, Sarah, then everything's fine. You got yourself a girlfriend. Don't cheat on her.

28:27 Oleander Tell her the truth.

28:28 Drew You got a lot of stuff to deal with that, Sarah, right? Your history, even more than what you're telling us.

28:36 Adam Can you just, I'll tell you what, you don't have to tell us, but would you tell us there's more here than what you're telling us?

28:43 Drew Yes. There is. There just is. It has to be.

28:45 Adam All right. Sarah, we're doing a radio show. Honey, you got to talk a little bit. I know you've been through a lot.

28:51 Drew You got to deal with all this. You got to deal with it. You need some help. Even if it's just going to Al-Anon or Alateen, starting there and making some connections with people.

28:57 Oleander Write some songs.

28:58 Drew That can take you a long way sometimes.

29:00 Adam All right. All right.

29:01 Drew It starts with really addressing reality in reality terms. I'm sure it's just socked for you.

29:06 Adam Yeah. And listen, I'm just pissed off because I'm trying to do a radio show here, but I feel bad for Sarah. Don't get me wrong. It's just I can't, when you're doing a radio show, it's tough to revisit the same issue over and over and get that long pause and the deep sigh and everything. All right. Let's figure out the money here. I'm going to take the $4. Wait a minute. Are we short a buck?

29:29 Caller Yeah, I need a change.

29:30 Adam You don't have a dollar?

29:30 Drew I need a change, yeah.

29:31 Adam You don't have a band? Had to put up all the money?

29:33 Drew I need change.

29:34 Adam That's pathetic.

29:35 Oleander You know what's pathetic? We dabbled on somebody's misfortune.

29:38 Adam No, that's all right. We're just trying to make a point. So Thomas, you get nothing, right?

29:45 Oleander As usual.

29:46 Adam Doug, you went with the booze and the drugs. We went with the booze. All right.

29:50 Drew But close enough.

29:52 Adam What about that sexual abuse?

29:54 Drew How about these seven, eight? Things going to hell.

29:56 Adam I'm going to give Drew a dollar.

29:58 Drew I know I don't deserve it.

29:58 Adam Exactly. I'll give Doug a two. You don't get any money. You didn't put any in. I'll give that back to Tom.

30:05 Oleander I'll take your dollar.

30:06 Adam We're going to take a little break. And when we come back, we'll speak to, Whom there, Drew? Let's re- Jimmy is 16.

30:16 Caller Uh...

30:18 Adam Okay, we told him not to have sex. Last time we talked to him, he got drunk and dead. Now his girlfriend's pregnant. That's good.

30:24 Drew Beautiful. Another satisfied customer.

30:25 Adam After this.

30:31 Love, 191.

30:33 Caller Operators are standing by. Love Line will be back in a minute.

30:45 Welcome back.

30:46 Caller We're glad you're here.

30:47 Love Line.

30:48 What's up, man? It is Loveline.

31:07 Adam I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Oleander's our guest tonight. Thomas and Doug are both here from the band. February Sun is the name of the CD. Probably gold by now. It's going cold at the top of the show, and I'm sure it is gold by now. We will hear something else from Oleander in the next hour, but until then, we'll get back to the phones. Jimmy?

31:30 Caller Yeah.

31:30 Adam You're 16?

31:31 Caller Yeah.

31:32 Adam When did we talk to you?

31:33 Caller Maybe a month and a half ago.

31:35 Adam All right.

31:36 Caller I called in and go, well, my girlfriend was having sex with me, but I'm reluctant because she was raped when she was a little child, and I didn't think she really wanted to have sex. It was just her instinct.

31:45 Drew Right.

31:46 Adam I thought that was like last week.

31:47 Drew Yeah.

31:48 Adam A month and a half.

31:49 Caller But we were at a party and I got drunk, so I really, I said, whoa, let's just go.

31:54 Adam Right. So you had sex at the party?

31:56 Caller Yeah.

31:57 Adam And you didn't use protection?

32:00 Drew That's the really brilliant part of this.

32:01 Adam And now she's pregnant? How far along is she?

32:06 Caller Probably about three weeks. I don't know.

32:08 Adam Three weeks?

32:09 Caller Not that far. Maybe a month. Not that far.

32:11 Adam Uh-huh.

32:12 Drew Well, what's going to happen here? What are you going to do?

32:15 Caller I don't know. She wants to keep it. I said no.

32:18 Adam Yeah. Hey, Jimmy? Yeah? You know how I'll use the word, the letter F instead of using the entire word?

32:29 Caller Uh, yeah.

32:29 Adam Like I'll go, that's F'd up. Are you Mother Affer? It's important that you do the same, you jackass. Using the entire F word on the radio. Please, we're not your family. Uh, alright, so how old is she? Sixteen?

32:45 Caller Fifteen.

32:48 Adam Okay, and do you think you could talk her into adoption or abortion or something with the shin at the end of it? No abortion.

32:57 Adam Here's the part I like. She doesn't believe in that, right?

32:59 Caller I don't believe in it.

33:00 Adam You don't believe in it. But you'll go ahead and nail underage chicks at a party.

33:05 Caller I was drunk.

33:05 Adam While you're loaded. What do you mean you don't believe in it? No excuse.

33:08 Caller I don't believe in that. That's just like killing some kid.

33:11 Adam No, it's not.

33:12 Oleander I'm into making stuff, man, not destroying.

33:16 Caller All right.

33:16 Adam Well, Jimmy, good. You'll have a kid before you're 17, and you can drop out of school, forget about college, and just get a job at the factory and put papers on them. Yeah. Listen, screwball, and all you screwballs out there who don't believe in abortion, you better believe in condoms if you don't believe in abortion.

33:38 Drew Or morning after pill for Christ's sake.

33:41 Adam What is wrong?

33:41 Caller I feel really bad for what I did now.

33:44 Adam Okay. Listen.

33:45 Caller I don't want to have sex with her in the first place.

33:47 Drew Right. Okay.

33:48 Adam How about you give the kid up for adoption?

33:52 Caller I'll talk her into it.

33:53 Drew You'll talk her into it?

33:54 Caller Yeah.

33:55 Adam You think you can do that? You're pretty persuasive, especially when you use that f-word.

33:59 Drew He's convinced me already.

34:01 Caller Yeah.

34:01 Drew I'll talk her now. Okay.

34:02 Caller Okay.

34:04 Adam Hey, Jimmy, will you do that? Please.

34:07 Caller Yeah.

34:07 Adam Okay. Okay. And from now on, please use some birth control. Would you, brother?

34:14 Caller Okay.

34:14 Caller Jimmy should use a Jimmy.

34:16 Adam All right. That's right. Jimmy?

34:18 Caller Yeah.

34:18 Adam Okay. Do that.

34:19 Caller Okay. Okay.

34:21 Adam I don't know if he's like retarded or screwed up or bogus or what his deal is.

34:26 Drew I'm sorry. I'm thinking BSing.

34:28 Adam Let me tell you something. When I'm in charge, you hear politicians talk about the weed and seed program. I am not going to seed. I'm just weeding. I'm going to drag an entire rake over this country and get rid of all the jimmies of the world, put them on a big island for retarded teenagers where all they can do is have anal sex with monkeys. And there will be no teenage women on that island. And I'm sending...

34:51 Drew And guess what? That's probably what they'll do with the monkeys.

34:54 Adam It's probably going to take a couple of weekends before they figure that out. But eventually they will get down to the monkeys.

35:03 Oleander Monkeys are themselves and you know they're going to go monkeys.

35:06 Adam Steve?

35:06 Yeah.

35:07 Adam You're 17.

35:08 Oleander Yeah.

35:08 Adam What's up?

35:10 I can't orgasm while I'm having sex.

35:12 Adam Yeah. What about during oral sex?

35:14 No.

35:14 Caller I can't do that either.

35:15 Drew How about during masturbation?

35:17 Caller Yeah.

35:18 Drew No problem.

35:18 Caller Yeah.

35:19 Drew Have you had a girlfriend?

35:21 When I was 15, the first time I had sex, it went on for like 40 minutes and then I just gave up, you know.

35:29 Drew Have you ever had a girlfriend?

35:30 Yeah.

35:30 Drew How long was that relationship for?

35:32 They're not more than like a month or so.

35:34 Drew They're not really as much of a girlfriend, is it?

35:35 No.

35:36 Drew Have you ever thought about maybe trying to get a relationship going so you have a chance to feel more comfortable and really sort of work this thing out?

35:43 Caller No, I never really thought about it like that.

35:44 Drew Wouldn't you think that would be the way to do it, Adam?

35:45 Caller Better.

35:46 Adam Yeah.

35:47 Drew What do you call this sort of, you get one relationship where you work it out, the work it out relationship?

35:51 Adam Yeah, I can't remember what I call that. Well, let's just say I called it the work it out relationship. Every guy, and I think women, too, but I think more so for guys. You all had that one, especially if you're older, you had that one relationship you worked it all out in. You got all the positions in, you got your confidence, you sort of flexed your sexual muscles a little bit. I mean, a lot of guys had a lot of, they lost their virginity, that was a bust, that didn't work out well. Then there was that drunken thing with your friend's sister in the back, that was a disaster too. And then, you know, a series of sort of one-night-whatevers and fly-bys and everything. But then you get in that relationship and you get that chick and it's that first relationship where you're like walking around naked. You know what I'm talking about? Not just naked in bed, but you're actually doing stuff nude. You're heading down to the kitchen and stuff. You're getting it on in every room of the house. And you're getting all your positions down. You're getting your technique down. You're getting your confidence down. And all in this, like, six months or one year, or however long it goes, whether you're 16 or 21, whatever it is, you work it all out with this one chick. And from that point on, you're pretty good. You understand your weaknesses and your strengths. You get a little technique down. You've sampled all the positions. You kind of know what to expect. Steve needs one of those.

37:15 Oleander Yeah, I agree. Totally.

37:17 Adam And if you just hang out with chicks for three weeks at a time, you never get that worked out.

37:22 Oleander You can't even get comfortable.

37:23 Adam You got to work it out. Vagina is like a baseball mitt, Steve. You can't use a new mitt every game. You'll have a horrible day out there. You get the oil in there. You have dad park the car on it overnight. You know, you put the ball in it and then you put the belt around it. Right. And you work it in and then you use it for the whole season. And you get more confident as the season wears on.

37:44 I don't think it's really like a nervousness thing, you know, but it's like I can't really feel anything.

37:48 Caller It's not like it's doing anything for me.

37:52 Adam That's an emotional thing.

37:53 Drew And it's a mechanical thing too. It's something you have to work out.

37:56 Adam Yeah, you work it out. But if you can't feel a mouth on your penis or a vagina on your penis, you might as well just kill yourself.

38:03 Drew Providing you don't have any medical problems, you're not on medications, is that right?

38:07 Caller No, I'm not on any medications.

38:08 All right.

38:09 Adam Steve, find yourself that one special lady and work it out.

38:12 All right.

38:12 Caller Can I also say what's up to Oleander?

38:14 Oleander Hey, what's up?

38:15 All right.

38:16 All right. Thanks a lot.

38:17 Adam All right, Steve. Thank you.

38:19 Caller All right.

38:20 Brett?

38:22 Drew Brett? What was that?

38:25 Caller Brett?

38:25 Adam I don't know what that was. Brett's been on hold for like 58 minutes.

38:28 Oleander Maybe Steve couldn't feel it because he had a condom on. Do you ever think friction?

38:32 Caller Wait, wait, wait.

38:34 Adam Whoa.

38:35 Drew That's sleep apnea syndrome.

38:38 That's rough.

38:39 Caller That sounds rough.

38:41 Oleander Is that the gimp?

38:44 Adam Brett's been on hold for 58 and a half minutes. Is that true?

38:48 Drew That's what it says.

38:49 Adam And the soothing nasally drone of my voice has lulled yet another listener to sleep. All right, let's just all enjoy Brett's deep nasal drones for a second.

39:06 Drew He's going to pick it up in a minute.

39:07 Caller Watch.

39:08 Drew Really? Yeah. So sleep goes.

39:11 Caller Here it comes.

39:12 Adam Like a yak is giving birth.

39:14 Drew Here it comes.

39:20 Adam I don't know, Drew. He seems about at least 15 to 20 ants away from picking up.

39:29 Oleander Sounds like the back lounge of our bus on a long ride, man.

39:32 Adam That was a short one. Wait a minute. That was good. That was what was left of the one before it. I'll tell you, I'd like to do like a pay-per-view special. We just had our listener snoring. It's great entertainment. Okay.

39:52 Oleander We got to do a gamble on this one then.

39:54 Adam Well, here's the gamble.

39:55 Caller What was Brett's problem?

39:58 Adam Sleep apnea.

40:00 Drew He's drowsy all day long.

40:01 Adam Best friend's ex told him she fantasized about him.

40:05 Drew Should he go for it?

40:06 Adam So, he wants to know if he should go for it with his best friend's old girlfriend.

40:11 Drew Yeah.

40:11 Adam In other words.

40:12 Drew Just based on the sound, the qualities that he produces vocally here, just put an image on his body habitus for us.

40:18 Adam I'd say about 375 and covered with festering poils. All right, there's one more.

40:29 Drew Now, Lisa, do not do. Lisa, leave him on hold for a while. We'll check in.

40:32 Adam And don't wake him up either.

40:34 Drew Yeah, don't wake him up. Just leave him there for our enjoyment.

40:36 Adam This may be the whole show. We may not be able to get to that second Oleander song.

40:40 Oleander That's fine with me, man.

40:41 Adam All right. We will take ourselves a little break.

40:46 Drew Oh, shit.

40:46 Caller Oh, there it is.

40:47 Adam Oleander's our guest tonight. We'll come back. We'll see if Brett's still asleep. But Lisa, please, don't do anything to disturb Vlad. All right. Get him some warm milk. All right. All right. We'll be back. Put him on hold. Come right. Oh, let me just. Okay. Let me just catch it. We're back here with Loveline. I'm Adam. That is Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Hey, a man shows on tonight if you're in the East Coast area, right? Does the show run on a delay?

41:52 Drew Yeah.

41:52 Adam Yeah, that's right.

41:53 Drew But it's already passed. Well, oh no, it's tomorrow.

41:57 Adam It's in the middle of it.

41:58 Drew Right, right, right.

41:59 Adam Yeah, but it's tomorrow if you're out here. I want to get that pre-plugin. Thomas Flowers and Doug Eldridge are both here from Oleander. February Sun is the name of the CD. It's probably now coming on Platinum. Oh man. It's going on gold at the top of the show. All right. Now, should we check back in with Brad to see if he's still sleeping? I think it's a necessity.

42:20 Drew Or is it too soon? We were spoiling that.

42:23 Adam All right. I'll tell you what. If we check back in with Brad and he's still sleeping, I just want to hear two snores and then two good ones. Two good ones. Then we'll because you're right, we don't want to we don't want to over indulge.

42:35 Caller Should we gamble on this, though?

42:37 Oleander No, no, dude.

42:38 Caller We got to gamble. We got to see if he's still sleeping.

42:40 Adam I think we'll gamble on the next one.

42:42 Caller Okay. If he's still sleeping.

42:44 Oleander You've got more money than I do.

42:45 Adam Okay.

42:53 Oleander Unbelievable, man.

42:54 Adam Brett has now been on hold for 64 minutes, and I wonder when Brett tucked himself in. 10-minute mark, 15-minute mark.

43:03 Drew He's an hour to sleep right now.

43:05 Adam Usually, it's when I go into one of my high school football stories. That's usually the point where they jump off. But tonight, I hadn't told these stories yet. I'm surprised you nodded off so quickly. Joe?

43:17 Yes.

43:17 Adam You're 26.

43:18 Caller Correct.

43:19 Adam What's up?

43:20 Caller Oh, a lot, unfortunately. I work at a nightclub and I get hit on a lot. The girls flirt with me, but I've been abstaining from sex for a while and I get this really annoying boner and I can't seem to get rid of it at the nightclub and I'm getting teased about it. So.

43:36 Adam It's your boner though, right?

43:37 Caller Oh, yeah.

43:40 Adam And why are you abstaining from sex?

43:43 Caller Well, I want you to meet a nice girl and the problem is, especially here in Southern California, there's just a lot of girls that are just screwed in the head, you know, problems with ex-boyfriends, parents' abuse, all sorts of stuff and it's just hard to find a nice girl that's not whacked.

43:59 Adam Have you had a bad experience with women before?

44:02 Caller Oh, yeah. Real bad. What happened? Huh?

44:05 Drew Give us an example of a bad trip.

44:08 Caller Got married to a woman with a divorce, two kids, had a child with her, left me for the minister of our church.

44:19 Adam Wow.

44:19 Caller That's pretty bad. She had problems when she was a kid.

44:23 Adam What a surprise.

44:24 Yeah.

44:25 Caller Wow. I'm trying to like try to wait and I don't want to end up with a son. I love to death and I don't want to end up with another son that doesn't have this. I'm not the full-time father.

44:35 Adam What kind of club do you work at?

44:37 Caller A night club, a dance club in San Diego.

44:42 Adam Well, there's got to be some normal chicks coming in there, doesn't there?

44:47 Caller Yeah, there are.

44:49 Drew Joe's radar is off a little bit too probably.

44:51 Adam That's true.

44:53 Caller A girl starts talking about ex-boyfriends or everybody done me wrong song or what happened to them when they were kids are done, right then and there, done.

45:03 Adam So can you go somewhere else to meet chicks?

45:06 Caller Well, church is out.

45:08 Drew Yeah.

45:08 Adam Yeah.

45:09 Drew Got a bad experience there too.

45:11 Caller Right now, my problem is though, is I mean, I even tried whacking off a couple of times for going into work and it just doesn't seem to work. A girl flirt with me and I just, boing.

45:21 Adam You just get that erection, huh?

45:23 Caller Yeah, I can't help it.

45:25 Adam Yeah, well, what are you wearing? Sweatpants?

45:27 Caller No, I wear baggy pants.

45:29 Adam Yeah, well, that's the problem. You got to wear tight fitting zeppelin or Jordache style jeans. Zeppelin. Zeppelin.

45:36 Caller I'm a little out of style there, you know.

45:39 Adam I don't care. They keep the penis in check. You could not, you couldn't shove a popsicle stick down your waistband when you're packed tightly.

45:47 Oleander Man, there are singers and bands that would envy that position.

45:49 Adam That's right.

45:50 Oleander To have that on stage, just, you know.

45:52 Adam You got to wear, just get a pair of Levi 501s, really. It's hard for a boner to push through those things.

45:59 Oleander Okay.

46:00 Adam And if you have, here's what will get rid of a boner. A lot of people don't know this. So I tell you, hitting it with a...

46:08 Caller A ruler?

46:09 Adam With a cold, a frozen ruler. Yeah, that'll get rid of it. But I understand a lot of guys at work don't have a frozen metal ruler at their disposal. No, if you get an erection, here's the thing. All right, here's my erection theory, but you guys jump in if you disagree. The penis is hanging down, right? It's in its normal states, facing the floor, right? Then it starts to get a little... I'll use my fingers as a penis indicator here. And of course mine's smaller, but it starts pushing. It starts getting a little wrecked and it starts rising up a little, but it only goes up a little bit. Now it hits the pants. Right, right. Now it has a little resistance now. So it starts pushing a little harder, sort of like... You ever go to the zoo and you see like a rhino scratching itself up against a post or something, you know, it starts leaning up against it. Friction comes into play too. It starts pushing and then of course the harder it pushes, the more the pant holds it back. And before you know it, you have a raging boner, sort of based on the resistance of the pants. Now the way you get rid of that boner, reach down, and you got to do this in a discreet way, grab the junk, pull it up so it's against your belly. Now, the penis is completely disoriented. Doesn't know where it is. It's facing your chin now. Now, when it starts pushing, it can't really push in that position because it can't push in your abdomen, and it doesn't push backside. It doesn't go down. The blood will drain right out of it into the testicles, right, Drew?

47:32 Drew This is a small penis strategy.

47:34 Adam It is? Yes. Because if it's big, you're saying if you did that with yours, it just flopped right out of like the third button of your shirt would just pop off, and you'd be hanging out from your chest like if it was alien or something? Come on, Drew. It works. You might have to hike your pants up a little bit.

47:50 Drew On the contrary, at the just raising up stage, there's a sort of a kink and it's difficult to getting the blood in at that point. Yeah, but if the pressure is high enough, downstream, stuff doesn't get in there.

48:04 Adam That's so you're saying zeppelin jeans, then.

48:05 Drew Right, that's right.

48:06 Adam Okay, and what I'll do when I wear the zeppelins is I'll put in two wallets, one on each ass cheek, to really add some tension to the front, in symmetrical tension. You know, you put one wallet in, it pulls a little harder on the left or the right side. You put two wallets in, it really adds a degree of pressure to the front. The chicks appreciate that. Jennifer?

48:29 Caller Hello.

48:29 Adam You're 14? Yeah. What's up?

48:32 Caller Well, I went out with these two guys and they ended up being stoners after they dumped me. And they were like totally clean when I was going out with them.

48:42 Adam So you're saying you turned them into stoners?

48:45 Drew How old were they when you turned them?

48:47 Well, this is like happened a couple of weeks ago and they were 14.

48:51 Drew Well, that's sort of the age when that kind of behavior sets in, sets up.

48:55 Caller Okay.

48:55 Adam Probably just happy coincidence.

48:58 Caller Stoner yourself?

48:59 Caller No.

48:59 Drew Do you have an alcoholic parent?

49:01 Caller No.

49:01 Adam Did you take a hit off a bong and then do that French kiss transfer thing?

49:07 Caller Nope.

49:08 Adam No. Okay. So you didn't, you didn't, you didn't encourage them to smoke weed?

49:13 No. All right.

49:14 Adam So do you think it was you that caused them to do this?

49:18 Well, it happened like right after they don't meet.

49:20 Right.

49:20 Drew Were you going to both of them simultaneously?

49:22 Caller Huh?

49:23 Drew Were you dating both of them simultaneously?

49:24 Caller No. No. All right.

49:26 Adam Well, as Drew says, when guys get into weed, they do it about that age. So it was probably just coincidence.

49:32 Caller Okay.

49:33 Adam If it happens a third time, call us back.

49:35 Caller Okay.

49:36 Adam All right. Well, that was easy.

49:39 Drew She has an alcoholic parent somewhere. She didn't know it yet.

49:41 Adam You think so?

49:42 Drew Yeah. She's picking addicts. Even before the incipient addicts.

49:46 Adam Jennifer? You still there?

49:48 Drew No. She said no, but she said no.

49:50 Adam Interesting. So you think that's what's going on? Andy?

49:54 Yeah.

49:54 Adam You're 14?

49:55 Caller Yeah.

49:56 Adam What's up?

49:57 Caller Nothing much.

49:58 Adam All righty. Hey, um. That's not good for the show. Put Johnny on. Is he there?

50:05 Caller Huh?

50:06 Adam Okay. Hey, uh, Andy?

50:08 Caller Yeah.

50:09 Adam Well, you called us, remember?

50:11 Caller Yeah.

50:11 Adam What's up?

50:13 Caller Nothing.

50:14 He is qualified.

50:16 Adam All right, hold on. Andy, I'm going to put you on hold for about well, you've been on hold for 72 minutes. All right? I'm going to put you on hold for about another 15 minutes. Okay? I'm fine. Okay.

50:27 Drew Does he know why? I don't think he's going to get the message.

50:30 Adam So you mean it's like when your puppy takes a cramp and you start smacking on the newspaper, but the puppy doesn't know it's because of the cramp.

50:37 Drew It's just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

50:38 Adam So your puppy just thinks you're beating the cramp out of the newspaper for no good reason. So that's not good then, right?

50:44 Drew No.

50:45 Adam All right. Let me try. Let me just try one more time with Andy. Hey, Andy. Yeah. What's up, brother?

50:53 Drew You know what? I'd rather listen to this.

51:01 Oleander Andy, that's nothing, brother.

51:03 Adam Drew, now you screwed the whole gambling thing up. He's still asleep. We know he's still asleep, please.

51:09 Oleander Maybe nothing was Andy's problem and he wanted you to address nothing.

51:12 Adam All right. Well, you may have a interesting sort of cerebral point there. We'll check into it. We're going to take a break. Well, I'll tell you what. It'll be a coin toss. Where do we talk to Andy and ask him what's up? Or we get back to Brett.

51:27 Drew I have an idea.

51:28 Adam We'll see how Stevie had to set them straight.

51:29 Drew We're going to have a stereophonic experience when we get back.

51:32 Adam Oh, we'll have Brett and Andy?

51:33 Caller We're going to get a conference call.

51:35 Adam Interesting. All right. After this.

51:37 Caller Loveline, be right back in a minute.

51:50 Adam We'll be back with more of the Fabulous Loveline in just ten seconds.

51:54 This is Loveline on Radio Station.

52:03 I am about to be utterly and madly carried away.

52:09 Adam It is Loveline. Oleander is our guest tonight. February Sun is the name of the CD. We have Thomas and Doug from the band here. And when we left off, we were listening to Brett snore. Let's see if he's still asleep.

52:27 Caller Uh-oh.

52:28 Drew He may be awake.

52:29 Adam There seems to be some movement.

52:31 Caller Uh-oh.

52:33 Brett?

52:35 Caller Hello?

52:35 Oh, no.

52:38 Adam You bastard. Brett, what's happening?

52:43 Brett?

52:43 Caller Yep.

52:45 Adam This is Loveline?

52:46 Yes, sir.

52:47 Adam I'm, uh, Adam. Hi, Brett.

52:51 Yep.

52:52 Adam Here's what I want you to do. I want you to put the phone down.

52:56 Caller Yep.

52:56 Drew Go back to sleep.

52:59 Adam You really were more valuable to us when you were asleep. We can get questions from anybody. I want you to go over to the sink and I want you to put some cold water on your face and come back and pick the phone up, all right? I'm here. Are you serious?

53:12 Yep.

53:12 Adam You good?

53:13 Yep.

53:13 Adam Because you dozed off on us earlier.

53:16 Yeah.

53:16 Adam Yeah. What do you... How much do you weigh, Brett?

53:21 173.

53:23 Adam 173 and you're 5'1?

53:26 Caller Uh, five-eight and a half, for sure, somewhere in there.

53:30 Adam All right. You really snore like a battalion of Marines. You really do some snoring. You're not married, are you? Nope. Yeah. Wife divorced you because of the snoring?

53:42 Caller No, she divorced me, but that wasn't why. No.

53:44 Adam She didn't... She may not have said anything, but that had to be a factor.

53:48 Caller Could have been.

53:48 Adam Imagine sleeping next to Brett every night. Oh, my God. All right, Brett, what's your question? Where are you calling from, by the way, Brett?

53:57 Caller What's that?

53:58 Adam Where are you calling from?

53:59 Caller Uh, Barnesville.

54:01 Adam Barnesville? Oh, over near, uh...

54:03 Drew Worcesterville.

54:05 Adam Is that off of the interstate?

54:07 Caller It's right next to it.

54:09 Adam Next to the interstate near Worcesterville?

54:11 Caller Near Fargo.

54:12 Adam Oh, near Fargo?

54:13 Drew North Dakota.

54:14 Caller Yep.

54:14 Adam Oh, really? All right. All right. We knew you were out. Is it cold over there?

54:21 Caller Actually, this time here, it's been early down there.

54:24 Adam Oh, okay. All right. What time is it? Is it? We're talking two hours? Two hours.

54:30 Caller All right.

54:30 Adam What's your question, buddy?

54:35 Caller My boyfriend's girlfriend broke up with him about two or three weeks ago.

54:42 Adam Oh, that's right. Now she's putting the moves on you.

54:46 Caller Yeah.

54:46 Adam Yeah. You like her?

54:49 Caller Yeah.

54:50 Adam Did you like her? Were you attracted to her when they were going out?

54:54 Caller Very much so.

54:56 Drew Is he going to be pissed?

54:58 Caller Pardon?

54:59 Drew Is he going to be pissed if you start dating her?

55:03 Caller Did I start dating her?

55:05 Adam Let's see. Water. Hey, Brad, remember that time about the cold water on the face?

55:09 Drew All right.

55:09 Adam You're going to need to do that. Now, just go do that.

55:12 Caller I'm sorry.

55:13 Adam Brad, listen. I gave you an opportunity to do it your way. It's not working out.

55:17 Caller Well, I couldn't hear it.

55:18 Adam That's what I'm talking about. Go put the cold water on your face, and I'm going to get back to you in about three minutes. Just set the phone down, all right? All right.

55:26 Caller Hey, let's put along with Andy and see what happens.

55:28 Adam Yeah. All right. Let's let's talk to Andy. All right. Now, no one's say anything. Let's see if I can keep going. I got a nice role with Andy. Each time I say what's up, he says nothing much. And that's that. That's right. Here we go.

55:40 Caller Ready?

55:42 Adam Andy, you're 14. Yeah. What's up?

55:46 Caller I got like, almost tricked in there.

55:49 Caller He's ruining the whole show.

55:52 Adam Wait a minute. Lisa, did you tell him?

55:55 Caller I told him.

55:57 Adam Lisa, honey, where are your instincts, sweet pea? Come on now.

56:01 Caller You told me not to say anything to boy.

56:04 Adam Come on. Come on, Lisa.

56:05 Caller Come on.

56:07 Adam Come on.

56:08 Drew All right, Andy.

56:09 Adam No more of that.

56:09 Drew Andy, what's going on?

56:10 Adam You're screwing up some good radio here for Christ's sake.

56:13 Drew Andy.

56:14 Adam Andy, what's up?

56:16 Caller I've got like two questions for you. Real quick. Go. Okay. On like Monday's show, you said something about watching the Butch and Sundance show.

56:24 Adam The movie?

56:25 Caller Yeah.

56:25 Adam Yeah.

56:26 Drew Butch and the Sundance. What? Butch Cassidy?

56:27 Adam And Sundance kid. Yeah.

56:29 Caller Yeah. What was that Butch guy like?

56:33 Adam What was the Butch guy like?

56:35 Drew What do you think Adam is referring to?

56:38 Caller Because he's my ancestor and I'm just...

56:40 Drew There's a famous movie from the 70s that you can't have lived in that decade and not have seen this film.

56:45 Adam Amanda Foreman was in here. She's on Felicity and her father produced that movie and other movies.

56:53 Drew It's probably the most famous movie of that first half of that decade.

56:55 Adam It's a really good 70s movie. Redford Newman. Good sort of Western. You guys drove that movie? Yeah, excellent movie. So Andy, someone says you're related to Butch.

57:08 Caller Yeah, my grandpa told me.

57:09 Adam Yeah. You know, my grandmother has rambled on for years about some ancestor of ours signing the Declaration of Independence. You know? But it's like, let's say he did. I still grew up in a dump in North Hollywood.

57:23 Drew Which I saw today. I'm delighted to have seen that.

57:26 Adam And clean carpets for a living. So who gives a rat's ass whether he signed that thing or not?

57:31 Drew The neighborhood was not nearly as much of a dump as I was expecting.

57:34 Adam No, the neighborhood's not bad. But the barn.

57:37 Drew Yeah, the house was interesting. It was not unappealing. It was just scary.

57:41 Adam Well, you didn't see it when the lawn was up to here and the roof was falling off. The house has been redone several times since. You kidding me? Drew and I were working in North Hollywood today and I was on a cell phone with Drew and he was driving home and he told me what street he was going down. And I said drive by the house I grew up in and I talked him through it. This is this street. Turn left. You'll be passing that street. So he went and you didn't have sex with my mom, did you? You didn't stop.

58:06 Drew Is your mom there still? Oh, yes. Well, that's her house.

58:09 Adam Yeah. Where's she going?

58:11 Drew Oh, wow.

58:11 Adam It's my grandparents' house. They just let her live there. Wow. They had another house.

58:15 Drew It looks like some homestead. Like the first thing was built 100 years old. Was it part of a farm or something one time?

58:22 Adam I don't know. Who the hell knows? I think it's haunted.

58:25 Drew It looks like the house from Psycho.

58:28 Adam Yeah. It's the house on the hill.

58:30 Drew Yeah.

58:30 Adam It's a psycho house. Yeah.

58:31 Drew It looks like the top, like the top couple of floors. Somebody cut off the bottom floor and put it down on the ground.

58:36 Adam My friends called it the barn. It was a big hit in the mid 70s.

58:40 Drew I could see it. The nice neighborhood. I could see how kids would hang out there because the school is right across the street.

58:44 Adam Oh, yeah. Every time I ditch, I just look at them right through the window. All right.

58:50 Drew So, Andy, what was your other question?

58:54 Caller I just want to know if my family could have an effect on my life.

58:58 Drew If what could? What family?

59:00 Caller My ancestors and stuff because my grandpa said he was supposed to be my 14th or 16th cousin or something like that.

59:07 Adam So you're saying you may rob stage coaches as well?

59:11 Caller No, I'm just saying he was like into theft and stuff.

59:14 Adam Right.

59:15 Caller And I kind of got into that.

59:17 Drew Oh, Andy, getting to that is not a particular genetic issue. Interestingly, addicts get into that even before they get into their disease. It's part of the sort of thrill activation, thrill seeking that addicts can get into. So if there's alcoholism in your family, that sort of biology can fuel stealing.

59:38 Adam How's your dad doing?

59:40 Caller Oh, he's a big time drunk.

59:41 Adam Yeah, that's the guy you need to worry about more than Butch.

59:45 Drew So it is dealing with an alcoholic dad plus probably having inherited that alcoholic tendency, Andy. That's the issue. It's not about inheriting behaviors that a stagecoach robber necessarily manifested 100 years ago.

59:58 Caller All right.

59:59 Drew 150 years ago.

1:00:00 Caller All right.

1:00:00 Adam OK. So Andy, come on there, brother.

1:00:03 Caller Watch out.

1:00:05 Adam Don't go down this, would you? I just don't want to pay for it.

1:00:09 Caller You know what I'm saying? I'm going to stop stealing and stuff. My brother, he's in jail right now.

1:00:15 Adam Yeah.

1:00:16 Caller Like vandalism and all that kind of stuff.

1:00:18 Adam How old's your brother?

1:00:19 Caller Sixteen.

1:00:20 Adam You don't have any other brothers, do you?

1:00:22 Caller Yeah, two other ones.

1:00:23 Adam Oh, what the hell are they doing?

1:00:26 Caller My oldest brother, he's married.

1:00:29 Adam Oh, good.

1:00:30 Caller And at McDonald's. And my younger brother, he's still in school. He goes to the same school I do.

1:00:36 Adam All right. Andy.

1:00:38 Caller Yeah.

1:00:38 Adam You're going to be the richest, smartest one in your family. You just stay in school, you study, you go off to college, you make them all look like idiots. All right?

1:00:45 Caller Yeah. Everyone of my friends kind of said that.

1:00:48 Caller All right. Good.

1:00:49 Adam Do that. And don't worry about Butch.

1:00:53 Caller Okay.

1:00:54 Caller All right.

1:00:56 Adam Oh, boy.

1:00:57 Drew Boy.

1:00:58 Adam Yeah. I guarantee there's a bigger connection between alcoholic dad than his ancestry with Butch Gassidy.

1:01:04 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:01:05 Adam Drew, any famous people in your past that you're aware of?

1:01:09 Drew No. Benjamin Franklin or something.

1:01:11 Oleander He had a guy in my family that invented the question mark.

1:01:15 Caller Really?

1:01:16 Oleander No.

1:01:18 Adam Someone had to come up with it.

1:01:21 Caller Very regressing recording movies.

1:01:24 Adam Fred?

1:01:24 Caller Yes, sir.

1:01:25 Adam What movie is that from?

1:01:26 Caller Austin Powers.

1:01:27 Adam Oh, Jesus.

1:01:29 Oleander Summer's in Rangoon.

1:01:30 Adam I didn't see that part.

1:01:31 Caller My father.

1:01:33 Adam Brett?

1:01:33 Caller Yep.

1:01:34 Adam All right. Now, you put some cold water on your face? I'm here.

1:01:37 Drew Just tell her how you did.

1:01:38 Adam Did you put the cold water on your face? Yes, I did.

1:01:40 Caller Good job, Drew. Brett? Yes, I did. All right.

1:01:44 Caller Good call. Do we believe him? We want to bet on this?

1:01:46 Drew Doesn't matter. Let's get the question now.

1:01:48 Adam All right. So did your friend, here's the big question. Did your friend break up with the girlfriend or did she dump him?

1:01:56 Caller She broke up with him.

1:01:57 Drew So he's going to be pissed if you date her.

1:02:00 Adam Is he heartbroken?

1:02:02 Caller Yeah. As far as heartbroken, no. He's mad about it.

1:02:06 Adam Well, that's the male version of heartbroken.

1:02:08 Caller I guess.

1:02:09 Adam All right. So there's going to be trouble here.

1:02:11 Caller Right.

1:02:12 Oleander He's going to be breaking code by going out with her. That's not a good idea.

1:02:17 Adam Can you give it another month?

1:02:20 Caller Wait it out a little longer?

1:02:21 Oleander Yeah.

1:02:22 Adam I mean, really, here's your plan. Brett, I know you two are going to end up getting together because she likes you, right? Yeah. And there's not a whole long line of chicks that like you?

1:02:33 Caller Well, there's getting to be more.

1:02:35 Adam It's not going around the block.

1:02:37 Caller Is it, brother?

1:02:38 Adam Not real fast.

1:02:39 Caller Okay.

1:02:40 Adam What do you do for a living? Siding? Right.

1:02:42 Caller Oh.

1:02:44 Drew Seriously?

1:02:45 Adam Yeah.

1:02:45 Drew How did you hit that? You are good. Give me a block.

1:02:48 Oleander All right.

1:02:49 Adam Give me a dollar. Come on. That's all for.

1:02:51 Oleander The dollar.

1:02:52 Adam All right.

1:02:52 Oleander The dollar goes back to the dollar for Adam.

1:02:55 Adam I smelled siding on you, Brad.

1:02:57 Drew Why is that siding? What is that? Explain. I want this knowledge.

1:03:00 Caller How did you get that anyhow?

1:03:02 Adam Siding?

1:03:03 Drew Yeah. What is it about siding?

1:03:04 Caller Uh, it's...

1:03:06 Drew We got to talk about this.

1:03:07 Adam All right. We got to talk about this. Hold on a second. Hey, Brad? Yep. Here's your plan with this chick. You will go out with her. That's fine. Now, here's how this works. Take it slow. See if you can wait a few weeks. Then start going out with her. Be very discreet. Do not get sloppy. Do not get cocky. Then eventually this guy will find out. But if you're very discreet about it, he'll find out in three months, in six months, in eight months.

1:03:35 Drew He has a girlfriend.

1:03:36 Adam When he finds out, you guys started going out the day before he finds out, whenever it is. Whether it's three weeks from now or three years from now. You understand? That's the angle.

1:03:47 Drew All right. So do you think it is the activity of that job that creates the mindset or do certain kinds of people attract to certain kind of jobs?

1:03:56 Adam I have certain flares of clairvoyance that pop up every once in a while.

1:04:03 Caller But you get my point.

1:04:04 Adam Do I ever say anyone's into siding?

1:04:06 Drew No.

1:04:06 Adam Ever?

1:04:07 Drew No.

1:04:07 Adam Four years?

1:04:08 Drew No, but yesterday you hit it. You hit a sheet rocker.

1:04:11 Adam Yeah, sheet rock's a little easier to hit than siding. Siding's a little more specific.

1:04:15 Drew But do you think a certain kind of person's attraction to a certain kind of job? Or does the job create the person to a certain kind of mindset?

1:04:23 Adam Well, here's what happens. I work construction for so many years. I understand that mentality. And I understand the distinctions between the Finnish carpenters, the framers, the sheet rockers, the signers, the foundation guys, and the tin knockers.

1:04:38 Drew Yeah, yeah. There are certain cognitive levels that keep people stuck at certain positions or certain...

1:04:44 Adam Well, I knew this guy wasn't running a HMO, you know, out there in DeKalb or wherever. Where is he?

1:04:51 Drew Fargo.

1:04:52 Adam Fargo, right. I knew he... I didn't smell white collar on him. I smelled blue.

1:04:57 Drew All right.

1:04:58 Adam Dark blue.

1:04:59 Oleander But sighting on him.

1:05:01 Caller I mean, that was right on the money.

1:05:02 Adam Sighting was very specific. Little moments of clarity I have sometimes.

1:05:08 Drew But I want to know why...

1:05:09 Adam I don't know, Drew.

1:05:10 Drew What those qualities are. Is it a certain sort of cognition?

1:05:14 Adam I think you're trying to make sense out of something that may not make sense.

1:05:19 Drew That's what I'm saying. There has to be a way to learn this.

1:05:22 Adam Well, here's what it's a combination of.

1:05:24 Drew I've taught you how to sniff out the abuse and all that stuff. Now I want to know how to sniff out careers.

1:05:28 Adam You haven't taught me anything. You told me how to sniff glue out of a paper bag in the parking lot.

1:05:34 Caller I could have taught him that.

1:05:36 Adam Here's what this is. This is a combination of elimination. He's not a doctor. He's not an attorney. He's not a CPA. There's no white collar, anything.

1:05:46 Drew I can get the blue collar thing.

1:05:48 Adam He's not in college either. So there's a blue collar thing. Then he lives in Fargo. He's doing something with his hands. Well, it could have been. There's a combination between narrowing it down to about 25 jobs and then a little spike of clairvoyance.

1:06:08 Drew How many citing professionals are there out there? How many need for citing is there?

1:06:12 Adam In the greater Los Angeles area? Or are you talking about the country?

1:06:14 Drew In Fargo.

1:06:15 Caller In Fargo, there's a large demand for citing.

1:06:18 Adam I have to check my citing contracting chart in Fargo, but I can give you a number at the next commercial.

1:06:26 Caller Thank you.

1:06:27 Adam All right. Marnie, you're 20.

1:06:32 Caller Yes.

1:06:32 Adam All right.

1:06:33 Caller What's up?

1:06:34 Caller Well, every time I try to have sex with my boyfriend, it just doesn't really happen because it's basically painful.

1:06:45 Drew It's always been that way with him?

1:06:47 Caller With him, yes. I've only been with him for two months.

1:06:49 Drew How about with other people?

1:06:50 Caller With other people, no.

1:06:52 Drew Anything different about him?

1:06:54 Caller No, not really. I mean, I can only make sense of it thinking that it's some kind of psychological problem.

1:07:01 Caller Why?

1:07:03 Drew Or what would that problem be? Let's put it this way.

1:07:05 Caller Because, okay, well, like in my past, I've been with a lot of people.

1:07:10 Adam You've done what?

1:07:13 Caller I've been with 20 different people over, I mean, most of those were within about six months.

1:07:21 Adam 20 in six months?

1:07:23 Caller About 18 in six months, yes.

1:07:25 Adam Wow, that's a pretty good run. I wish I could put together that kind of a half year. Yeah. All right.

1:07:35 Caller I decided that that wasn't something that, that's not the way I wanted to live my life. And so, I just, I didn't have sex with anyone. Or, you know, anytime the opportunity came up, I just wouldn't do it.

1:07:48 Adam It's always great when you reach that guy at the end of the streaks, like I just got done banging half the neighborhood, except for now we're on date 15 and you ain't getting nothing.

1:07:58 Caller Yeah, he's real happy about it too.

1:07:59 Adam A good guy. Oh, they love that. Hey, I just want to test a theory here, Marnie. Are you exceptionally attractive?

1:08:06 Caller Exceptionally? I don't know about exceptionally.

1:08:08 Adam Are you attractive?

1:08:10 Caller Um, I guess.

1:08:11 Caller You're hot?

1:08:12 Caller I'm hot, yeah.

1:08:13 Caller You are?

1:08:13 Caller No, I don't.

1:08:15 Adam You're good looking?

1:08:15 Caller I can't judge myself.

1:08:16 Oleander What do people around you say?

1:08:18 Caller Okay, I get noticed.

1:08:20 Adam Yeah.

1:08:20 Oleander You're hot.

1:08:21 Adam My point is, and this isn't totally putting a light on my point, but women can do this. They want to do 18 in 6 months? They do 18 in 6 months.

1:08:31 Oleander Oh, yeah.

1:08:31 Adam Let's go do it. Hell, you could have done 38 in 6 months if you felt like it. I mean, if your knees were up to it. Right? Sure. Guys go out and try to do 18 in 6 months if they end up whacking off 18 times.

1:08:45 Oleander I can do that in 6 minutes. I can do that in 6 minutes.

1:08:49 Adam Full body cast, I'd get off 18. Go ahead, there.

1:08:53 Caller That's probably true.

1:08:55 Adam So anyway, now you're with a guy and you're having that vaginismus, right, Drew?

1:09:01 Drew Right.

1:09:01 Adam You're tensing up.

1:09:03 Drew Why all this stuff about your sexuality? Why are you so confused about it?

1:09:07 Caller Well, like I was really overweight and never...

1:09:12 Adam I never...

1:09:13 Caller Do you have an eating disorder?

1:09:14 Caller What?

1:09:14 Drew Do you have an eating disorder now?

1:09:16 Caller Now? No.

1:09:18 Drew How did you lose all the weight?

1:09:19 Caller When I was in school, I was anorexic. Okay. I mean, I never...

1:09:23 Drew Well, look, Marnie, eating disorders don't go away. They're chronic conditions.

1:09:27 Caller Yeah. I mean, as I got older, it turned more into, like, an over-exercising type of thing.

1:09:33 Drew Okay.

1:09:36 Adam Hey, Marnie.

1:09:37 Caller Yeah?

1:09:37 Adam Here's the thing that I've learned from doing this show, just like Drew's learned who does siding. People that have the eating disorder turns into a sexual thing at some point.

1:09:48 Drew Yeah, up or down?

1:09:49 Adam It's the same thing. And then the people that are sort of have the sexual disorder, they're either 18 or 6 months or they're nobody in 6 years.

1:09:59 Drew Yeah.

1:09:59 Adam It heats up and then it cools and then it just shuts right down. So you're shutting down right now.

1:10:06 Drew It's part of this, it's part of this character syndrome.

1:10:09 Adam But it's another part of this sort of eating disorder or the part that fueled the eating disorder in the first place. Right, right, right. So look into all that. But don't look into why am I, why this, what's wrong with this guy?

1:10:20 Drew Yeah, right.

1:10:21 Adam It's a waste of time.

1:10:22 Drew She's having pain because she is anxious and she's having vaginismus.

1:10:25 Adam But it's not this guy, it's just timing. He just showed up at the end of the run.

1:10:30 Drew He's having this phase of her, the expression of her condition. That's what's going on.

1:10:34 Adam It's just like, I know I said it before, but it's the biggest bitch in the world for a guy because it's like you're with somebody who was having sex with everybody and now and you're not, you're probably not nuts about that, but to compound things, you ain't getting any. You'd figure, well, okay, she banged half the neighborhood, at least I'm getting the best sex of my life, but you're now getting nothing. So it's like sort of the worst of both worlds for a guy. She's got to hope he's understanding and look into treatment. There you go. All right. Why don't, why don't we play an Oleander song before we go to break? Sounds good to us. Yeah, let's get it in there. Come on Anderson, don't be such a prude, okay? Come on Anderson. Yeah, this one's called I Walk Alone. It is Loveline. Is that Godsmack?

1:15:23 Caller No, that's Bush.

1:15:24 Adam That's Bush?

1:15:25 Oleander Chemicals from Tunis, I believe.

1:15:26 Adam All right. Well, then wait a minute. Oh yeah. We'll hear the Godsmack one later on.

1:15:31 Drew And they'll hear Oleander at the end of the night.

1:15:32 Adam That's right. That means it's Miller time.

1:15:34 Drew What's that?

1:15:34 Caller That's from like two months ago.

1:15:36 Drew You guys are way off.

1:15:37 Adam Oh, that's two months ago?

1:15:38 Drew What was two months ago?

1:15:39 Caller Godsmack's long gone, Oleander's long gone.

1:15:42 Drew Why don't you play it for us tonight?

1:15:44 Adam We already heard the song.

1:15:46 Drew I mean the bumpers.

1:15:47 Adam Play it. Can you do it?

1:15:48 Caller The bumper's been recycled.

1:15:50 Adam Oh, you know, I told you you never recycle an Oleander bumper. Remember I threw a tantrum about that?

1:15:56 Drew You ought to fit.

1:15:57 Caller I don't think I'm like an Anderson.

1:15:58 Drew In fact, that's what sent you off, battle is other things.

1:16:00 Adam That's right. Didn't even know the guys were coming on.

1:16:03 Oleander Oleander set you off, man. I like that. Could be the next name of the album.

1:16:08 Adam February's Son is the name of the CD. Thomas and Doug are both here from the band.

1:16:12 Oleander Enjoying ourselves by the way.

1:16:14 Adam Oh good. Well, we're enjoying having you.

1:16:16 Oleander Thank you.

1:16:16 Adam That's a nice... As Drew yawns. Nice time. Drew, could you time the yawn a little bit next time? You guys are real simulating.

1:16:25 Caller This is gross.

1:16:26 Adam Nick?

1:16:27 Yup.

1:16:28 Adam You're 16?

1:16:29 Caller Yup.

1:16:30 Adam What's going on?

1:16:32 Caller Well, there's a few, like four months ago or so I had my own apartment with my friend and we took on an extra roommate and he brought over this chick and she was like, I don't know, I didn't realize until later that she was like loopy dude, she's psycho or something.

1:16:47 Drew Loopy dude.

1:16:48 Caller Loony, loony, loony.

1:16:50 Adam And you're 16, you're already out of the house?

1:16:52 Caller Yeah, well it didn't work out, but.

1:16:55 Drew What didn't work out?

1:16:56 Caller The apartment thing. I'm trying again to get my own apartment.

1:16:59 Drew Why are you selling her to get out of your home? Your parents' home.

1:17:02 Caller It's just freeing a trip of mine.

1:17:04 Drew What's the matter with your home?

1:17:05 Caller Nothing, my dad's great and everything, but I don't know, I just have the urge to live on my own.

1:17:11 Drew Yeah, I think every 12 year old has that too.

1:17:13 Adam But you pitch a tent in the living room for a night or two and then you go back into your room.

1:17:19 Caller I used to do that.

1:17:20 Adam All right, well you smoked a lot of weed there.

1:17:22 Drew You smoked a lot of pot, Nick.

1:17:23 Adam Yeah, dude.

1:17:26 Drew Yeah.

1:17:26 Caller He's taking the pot.

1:17:28 Drew Yeah, you've been smoking pot since you were 12 when you were setting up those campfires.

1:17:31 Caller Yep, exactly.

1:17:33 Drew Yeah, I know. Listen, it's not an accident. We know what that does to the human brain. It's not an accident. We can pick it up and we just hear, we just can talk to you and tell how long you've been smoking pot.

1:17:43 Caller I'm your brain on drugs.

1:17:45 Drew Isn't that a concern to you?

1:17:47 Adam That is that obvious?

1:17:48 Caller I've come back like massive. I used to smoke like a 20 sack a day and now I just smoke like a 22nd month. Totally.

1:17:55 Adam 20 sack a day, really? Like 14 or 15?

1:17:58 Oleander That can be expensive, man.

1:18:00 Adam That's a ton of weed.

1:18:02 Oleander That's a lot of weed, dude.

1:18:03 Adam Hey, Nick, you and your dad were real cool or was your dad kind of pissed that you were smoking so much weed?

1:18:10 Caller That's sort of what led to me getting my own apartment. He kind of found out and we got into a big argument about it.

1:18:16 Adam Hold on a second. You see how transparent everybody is? It's like, hey, you're 16. You're living out of the house. Yeah.

1:18:23 Drew I'm just into that.

1:18:24 Adam I'm into that.

1:18:25 Drew Yeah, because it's about me.

1:18:26 Adam I've always been into it. Well, what's going on at home? Dad's great. Everything's great. Just wanted to live out of my own.

1:18:31 Caller Yeah.

1:18:33 Drew Flash forward five minutes.

1:18:34 Adam Smoking a lot of weed, ton of weed.

1:18:36 Oleander But how do you guys pick out the drug out of that? I mean, how do you get the pot out of that?

1:18:40 Adam He had the pot like that.

1:18:40 Caller That was a stoner talk.

1:18:42 Oleander Yeah, the stoner.

1:18:42 Caller He had the Spicoli going on.

1:18:44 Oleander I know the stoner talk. I mean, you pig him.

1:18:47 Adam But also, also, so here's what happened. Nick's smoking a ton of weed. Dad tells him to stop 100 times. He freaks out on him. They get in a blowout and he moves out.

1:18:57 Oleander Maybe Nick's smoking dad's weed and dad ain't cool with it.

1:19:00 Drew I bet you dad smokes pot too.

1:19:01 Adam Could be it. Nick, what's up?

1:19:04 Drew Dad smokes pot too, huh?

1:19:05 Caller No.

1:19:06 Adam No?

1:19:06 Caller Mom? To my knowledge, he never has. He might have like once or twice in college.

1:19:10 Drew But somebody's drinking.

1:19:12 Caller That's how good I am. Oh yeah, he used to be an alcoholic. There you go. He still is, technically.

1:19:17 Adam Right.

1:19:17 Caller Excellent.

1:19:18 Adam All right, so Nick, you're well on your way. But why don't you be honest with us? You didn't move out because it was time to leave the nest. You had a blowout with your dad about your pod smoking.

1:19:28 Caller Sort of both, but mostly probably the blowout thing.

1:19:30 Adam Okay. All right. So.

1:19:32 Drew Oh, you're going to regret this, Nick. Oh my God.

1:19:35 Adam All right. Well, hold on. He's 16.

1:19:36 Drew That's the point. It's just that he's not.

1:19:39 Adam You're back with your dad.

1:19:40 Drew That's good. But he's going to stay on the launching pad his whole life.

1:19:42 Adam Why don't you just try to back off on the weed here, Nick?

1:19:46 Drew No, it's not. He's trying to back out. The problem is with this level of when they do electron micrographs of brain that have been exposed to pod at this age for this long, you find this big, big layer around most brain cells in the cortex.

1:19:58 Adam It's a little padding.

1:19:59 Drew It's very dramatic, this dark layer. Nobody knows what that is. The cells don't work right.

1:20:03 Adam It's resin, that's what it is.

1:20:04 Drew That's what it looks like, but honestly, it isn't.

1:20:06 Adam Hey, don't bum Nick's high. He's trying to get a job. He doesn't need that thing. He doesn't need to be thinking about the layer of resin on his brain next time he's at a job interview.

1:20:16 Caller That's what I'll do next time I'm broke. I'll just scrape my brain.

1:20:20 Adam Just put a coat hanger up your nose and see if you can get some resins.

1:20:23 Caller Yeah, that's what the mummies did.

1:20:25 Adam All right. Hey, listen, Nick.

1:20:26 Caller Yeah.

1:20:27 Adam Stop watching Discovery Channel when you're stoned and freaks you out. Hey, Nick. Yes, Nick. Here's what you need to do. You need to quit smoking weed like tonight. You need to start taking vitamins, doing push-ups and find Jesus Christ and keep your fingers crossed. By then, by the time you're 18, you'll be semi-normal. But brother, you smoke too much weed for too long, you got to stop. Your dad's an alcoholic, you're doing your thing, and this is going to be trouble.

1:21:00 Drew All right. You didn't call about this, though. So what did you call about?

1:21:02 Caller Yeah. Oh, anyways, so this chick, she was like-

1:21:05 Drew Oh, really? Wow. Loopy chick living with you.

1:21:08 Caller Loopy chick. She was over at my apartment and she like, I don't know, she was totally psycho and she had a bad home life or something, but she had tried committing suicide and we were talking about it. And she asked me if I ever tried to commit suicide and I said no. And then she was like, all right, I'll be right back. And she went in the kitchen and she like cut her arm open. And I was like, dude, what's going on in there? So I went up and got in or I got up and went in there and she like, her arm was bleeding mass. She had like nine cuts in her arm. And so I took her in the bathroom and I like wrapped it up and freaking poured peroxide all over it and stuff like that. But I got like a whole bunch of blood on my hands. And I was wondering how long the virus stays alive and stuff after it like is not inside the body anymore.

1:21:46 Drew Does she have HIV?

1:21:48 Caller Huh?

1:21:48 Drew Does she have HIV?

1:21:50 Caller See, that's what I'm not sure of. But she did say that she had slept with a lot of guys.

1:21:55 Drew Does she have HIV?

1:21:56 Adam Well, he doesn't know.

1:21:57 Caller I don't know. I only knew her for the one night and never seen her since.

1:22:00 Drew Sleeping with a lot of guys is not typically a specific risk factor. I mean, she's not an IV drug user. Then it's somewhat of a-

1:22:08 Adam Maybe she slept with some guys who were junkies.

1:22:09 Drew Yeah.

1:22:10 Adam I'm sure she doesn't have AIDS.

1:22:12 Drew Yeah. Tremendous blood exposure. Yeah. I mean, that is a potential if you had an open wound or something yourself. But a very unusual way to get this disease.

1:22:21 Adam So you wouldn't put him on a suppressive cocktail.

1:22:24 Drew I might. If he'd come right away. But this is weeks and weeks ago, presumably.

1:22:29 Adam So what they do is if you're like a paramedic and some junkie stabs you with a rig, they'll put you on the triple cocktail right away. I mean before you test positive, in other words. They'll just assume that you have it or that you're going to have it and they'll put you on this viral suppressing drugs, right?

1:22:50 Drew Well, it actually seems to, we think.

1:22:52 Adam And you never get it.

1:22:53 Drew It will prevent the infection from taking place.

1:22:54 Adam How do they know though? Because.

1:22:55 Drew Because.

1:22:57 Adam Maybe you wouldn't have gotten it anyway.

1:22:58 Drew No. They did some studies where one group was treated and one wasn't and the conversion rate was higher in the group that wasn't.

1:23:04 Caller Unfortunate for the people that were not treated.

1:23:06 Adam Imagine what a bummer it is. Paramedics who have the syringe stuck in their shin and or with the test group A, you go over here. You take a sugar pill and then.

1:23:16 Oleander God bless them all though. I mean, man.

1:23:18 Adam Meanwhile, you fall apart. Yeah. Your arm falls off in two years. All right. Oh boy. Here's the point with our last caller there, Nick. Much bigger fish to fry than the than this potential HIV thing. This is, this is, you have a.

1:23:33 Drew But.

1:23:34 Adam Zero point whatever percent chance of being HIV positive. You have about a 78 percent, maybe, maybe 90 percent chance of just being a complete brain dead alcoholic.

1:23:44 Drew Loser.

1:23:45 Adam Loser, thank you.

1:23:46 Drew But it's interesting that oftentimes chronic pot smokers become very obsessive compulsive.

1:23:51 Adam Sure.

1:23:51 Drew And so they start preoccupying about stuff, obsessing about stuff. And this may be his most recent obsession.

1:23:56 Adam Richie.

1:23:58 Caller Yeah.

1:23:58 Adam You're 26.

1:23:59 Caller Yeah.

1:24:00 Adam What's going on?

1:24:01 Caller Well, I've been seeing this girl for about six months now. And, you know, things have been going real good. I mean, you know, when we're together alone, everything's great. She's got a six-year-old boy from a previous boyfriend. And I can tell that this boy has a lot of his father in him. He's just really out of control. And, you know, I don't... My life is such an uproar right now that I don't know if I should take on the commitment.

1:24:34 Adam How long has she been going out with her? Six months?

1:24:36 Caller About six months now.

1:24:37 Adam Yeah. You guys aren't living together?

1:24:39 Caller No.

1:24:39 Adam No.

1:24:40 Caller She wanted me to move in September. And I backed out.

1:24:43 Adam Yeah.

1:24:44 Caller Because I just wasn't ready for it.

1:24:46 Drew Dad, I'll tell you something about your feelings about this woman, though, right there.

1:24:49 Adam Well, it was pretty early. It was, you know, three, four months into the relationship.

1:24:53 Drew Good point. But again, his instinct was, I don't know, you know.

1:24:57 Caller That's what I felt. I mean, you know, it was a little too early.

1:25:00 Adam How do you know the father? You just know of him.

1:25:03 Caller Well, actually, I know her from high school. I know him from high school. And we ran into each other about six years later, which was about six months ago.

1:25:13 Drew You know, I graduated high school when you were 20.

1:25:16 Caller Yeah. Well, no, 19. Well, I graduated when I was 19. Yeah.

1:25:21 Adam Cool. I will hang around long enough where you can actually drink beer during lunch.

1:25:26 Drew Yeah.

1:25:27 Adam No one can say anything.

1:25:29 Caller Actually, we were smoking pot.

1:25:30 Adam Oh, okay.

1:25:31 Drew Surprise.

1:25:33 Caller But anyway, so, you know, my life is such an uproar right now that, you know, I'm having trouble with jobs and depression and the whole bit.

1:25:42 Adam Right. All right. And this kid's a real devil, huh?

1:25:47 Caller Well, I mean, you know, he's a good kid. I know he's got the intelligence, but he's just really out of control.

1:25:51 Adam I mean, you know, he says no to his mother, you know, no, and she can't discipline him.

1:25:58 Caller She tries to, but he just totally ignores her.

1:26:01 Drew Well, he might need a sort of a neurological medical evaluation to make sure he doesn't have some ADD or minimal brain syndrome. Was she doing drugs or anything while she was pregnant?

1:26:11 Caller No, no, she's a goody two shoes. And you know what? I asked her about that, if he had the ADD or whatever, and he was tested for that, he's got a problem with his eye. I don't know if that has anything to do with it, but I know there's some kind of, there was something, the kids are just too high strung and they can't control it. You know what I mean?

1:26:37 Adam Yeah, that's that ADD.

1:26:39 Caller Yeah, hyper...

1:26:41 Drew Maybe they also call them wham bam kids. They're the certain kind of kids that needs a lot of real physical experiences in the way of sort of organizing them, their emotional thought processes.

1:26:50 Adam Drew's got one of those. Hey Richie? Yeah? Is this guy, has this little kid been around his dad much? Is his dad part of his life?

1:26:58 Caller Well, you know, that's the shame about it, his father is, excuse my expression, but a prick. You know, he doesn't want anything to do with him.

1:27:08 Adam Yeah.

1:27:09 Caller All right.

1:27:09 Adam All right. Hey Richie? Listen, here's the deal, follow your instincts. I mean, you've only been with her for six months, you got another good six months before you got to make a move.

1:27:20 Caller That's true.

1:27:21 Adam You got to get your ass together. Why don't you give yourself six months, work on your career, work on your depression, work on whatever you got to work on, and just don't put any pressure on yourself. You'll continue dating, whatever it is. Give yourself until the summer. See if you can... She's ready to move on. I know she's ready to move on, and so am I. I put them on hold. I said give it six months. That's it. Just tell her. I want to get my head straight. I don't blame him. This is a tall order. I mean, my hat's off to these guys who can come into a situation with someone else's kid. The kid's out of control and he's acting out. And listen, this is one of the problems we're having in this country is dad is the disciplinarian. And when dad is never around, as is the case for, it seems like more and more of our kids in this country, the kids are out of control. They need the discipline of daddy. They absolutely do. I mean, it's a chemical thing. I swear to God, I watched this, I saw this thing on like 2020, the mom's driving the van and she's yelling at the kids to shut up while she's driving the van. And the kids are out of control. And then the dad drives the van and dad's like, shut up. The kids are, yeah. I mean, they put their cigarettes out and everything. Like they don't make a sound. They need, it's like a chemical biological thing. And if you get rid of papa, then everyone's running around like a madman.

1:28:52 Oleander I got to give this guy props, man. This is taking on the responsibility. It's a huge. It's a large commitment.

1:28:57 Adam Let's give it six months. Don't put the pressure on yourself. All right, we're going to take a break. When we come back, we'll speak to Anthony. Went down on girlfriend, found what appears to be a penis.

1:29:07 Drew Ouch.

1:29:08 Oleander What a surprise that would be.

1:29:09 Adam We're going to find out whether it was hers or-

1:29:11 Drew Now they're going to the doctor.

1:29:12 Adam Oh man. I'm guessing it could have been broken off like their last boyfriends. It's got lodge in there. Well, you know, like when a shark bites down on someone, it will leave a tooth.

1:29:21 Caller When the shark bites.

1:29:23 Adam With its teeth.

1:29:25 Oleander Inside joke.

1:29:26 Adam We'll take a little break and we'll be back with Oleander.

1:29:31 Caller Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline in just a minute or two. Call 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:29:53 Caller 94.

1:29:55 Adam NRK. It is Loveline. Thomas and Doug are both here from Oleander. February Sun is the name of the CD. I recommend it highly. And we will speak to, oh yeah, we were going to speak to Anthony anyway. Anthony? Hello. You're 19?

1:30:20 Oleander Yeah.

1:30:21 Adam All right, so you went down on your girlfriend?

1:30:25 Caller Actually, I was playing with her, and I was in there, about a couple of inches deep.

1:30:36 Adam With your hand?

1:30:37 Oleander Yeah.

1:30:39 Caller And there was this round, I don't know how to describe it.

1:30:44 Caller It was kind of like a round, it was kind of like a penis.

1:30:46 Drew Like the tip of a penis?

1:30:48 Caller Yeah.

1:30:48 Drew That's her cervix.

1:30:50 Caller That's her cervix?

1:30:51 Drew Yes.

1:30:52 Caller Okay, because she's really afraid about cancer and...

1:30:56 Drew Anthony, please.

1:30:58 Caller I don't know, she's pretty paranoid.

1:31:00 Drew Yeah. Wow. It's her cervix.

1:31:02 Caller Okay.

1:31:04 Drew The cervix looks... down the shaft of the vagina, the cervix can be anywhere from a couple inches to several inches down. And it looks like the tip of a penis, basically.

1:31:15 Caller Okay.

1:31:15 Adam And two inches is a little...

1:31:16 Drew Some women have real long cervixes, so it can really feel like there's actually a shaft in there.

1:31:21 Adam They don't nibble, do they?

1:31:23 Drew But they have dents in the middle, so they can feel like they have a real...

1:31:26 Adam Oh, really? But they wouldn't bite at your finger.

1:31:29 Caller Oh, they could.

1:31:30 Drew Some of them.

1:31:31 Caller It kind of hurt whenever I...

1:31:33 Adam It hurts her?

1:31:35 Caller It kind of hurt, yeah.

1:31:36 Caller She's kind of uncomfortable.

1:31:37 Drew Yeah, you're pushing on her cervix.

1:31:39 Adam Yeah. So that was fairly shallow, though.

1:31:44 Caller Yeah. Right?

1:31:46 Drew Two inches is pretty shallow.

1:31:47 Adam All right, so Anthony, there you go.

1:31:49 Caller So it's just the cervix?

1:31:50 Drew That's her cervix, yeah.

1:31:51 Caller Okay, great.

1:31:53 Caller Thanks a lot.

1:31:53 Oleander That would be a huge relief for him.

1:31:55 Adam Pretty relieved, aren't you, Anthony?

1:31:57 Oleander What's that?

1:31:57 Adam You thought you're dating a she-mal?

1:31:59 Oleander Banging her hermaphrodite?

1:32:01 Drew Well, not she-mal, like you found a penis looking out at him in her vagina.

1:32:06 Caller What were you thinking, Anthony?

1:32:07 Drew How would that happen?

1:32:08 Adam All right. Listen, he's Anthony.

1:32:11 Drew Yeah.

1:32:11 Adam Junior college?

1:32:12 Call the right people, though.

1:32:13 Adam What are you doing for a living?

1:32:15 Oleander I work at a print shop.

1:32:16 Adam All right. All right. You listen. You've got to open a window when you deal with that toner. You understand? It's messing with your mind. All right.

1:32:26 Caller All right.

1:32:27 Adam Print shop. You know what I like about print? There's a couple of businesses that are open 24 hours a day that I sort of understand, like donut shop. People, they jones for some donuts. You know, you pick them up at five in the morning.

1:32:40 Drew That sounds good. Right now, that sounds good.

1:32:42 Adam Yeah, donuts always sound good. As long as there's pot, there's going to be donut shops open 24 hours a day. But the other thing that always freaks me out is the print shops open 24 hours a day. And people always tell me why, but I still don't... There's no... For me, a print shop being open at like 315 in the morning, 445 in the morning. Don't get it. It doesn't make any more sense to me than a hardware store being open at four in the morning or a bank being open at four in the morning. I don't understand the print shop 24 hours.

1:33:10 Drew Is the principle that you come in at the end of the workday and you gotta have these documents printed up by morning?

1:33:16 Adam Yeah, I understand that. You drop it off by 637 in the evening and you can pick it up first thing when we open at 8 a.m. But I don't understand you wandering into the Kinkos at 430 on Tuesday.

1:33:27 Drew You've never done the college thing. Hell no I haven't. That's sort of a routine thing when you're grinding out a paper or a term paper and you need to get it copied.

1:33:35 Adam I know, but there's a lot of stuff.

1:33:37 Drew No, that is like essential I would think.

1:33:41 Adam I know, but listen, I didn't do the college thing, but I did the carpentry thing. And there were times when I was at the shop, I was like late delivering some cabinet job and I was working in the shop all night. It was 2 in the morning and I needed another sheet of plywood. I had to wait until 7 when the place opened up. You know, it was just, you know, you had to wait. I screwed it up, I didn't get the timing right, you know.

1:34:07 Drew And I'm sure there was a time when that was the way it was.

1:34:11 Adam All right, it was. I'm just saying, as soon as one print shop is open 24 hours, now everyone is. So that's why I never opened a print shop. Can you imagine how tiring that'd be? That'd be a bummer. You'd never sleep, you'd just stand behind a counter. Michelle?

1:34:24 Caller Hi.

1:34:24 Adam You're 15.

1:34:25 Oleander Printing.

1:34:26 Caller Yeah, I have a couple questions for Oleander.

1:34:29 Oleander You're kidding.

1:34:31 Caller I was just wondering why did you guys name yourselves Oleander? And why did you guys name your album February Sun?

1:34:41 Oleander First question first. Oleander was a flower that in and amongst the madness of trying to name our band and four different ideas, when we took a smoke break, one of us took a smoke break, all of us kind of looked at this bush and said, wow, amazing. And the chaos stopped. Rick the botanist, a guitarist who smokes, who was taking the smoke break, said, that's an Oleander bush. We all thought, wow, beautiful. And two days later, we thought nobody else on the planet would name their band Oleander.

1:35:11 Adam It's a good name for a band.

1:35:12 Oleander Thank you. I mean, it's ambiguous. It could be a disco band or a death metal band.

1:35:15 Adam Those are tulips on the cover though, aren't they?

1:35:17 Oleander Well, they're not poppies. Let's put it that way.

1:35:20 Drew Now, Oleander, if you live in the South of California, is just like weed.

1:35:23 Oleander Yeah, it grows everywhere. It's just cute. And, you know, that's the other thing.

1:35:27 Caller Northern California as well.

1:35:28 Drew The other thing is that I've had to treat people who cook up the Oleander flower.

1:35:32 Oleander Oh, no.

1:35:33 Drew Which it's an extremely effective way to commit suicide.

1:35:37 Oleander Really?

1:35:37 Drew Yeah.

1:35:38 Oleander Oh, no. See, I didn't want to be affiliated with that.

1:35:40 Drew That's the thing.

1:35:40 Caller That's so cliche for rock and roll.

1:35:42 Oleander Yeah.

1:35:43 Caller The poisonous fool.

1:35:45 Oleander Let's get off that tip.

1:35:46 Drew Okay, sorry.

1:35:47 Oleander Let's get on to the album. The album title itself, you know, that's the only other thing the bands argue about generally is, you know, what to call the band and then what to call the albums, right? Okay, well, we argued about that a little bit. As we were recording the album, we, I was reminded of a song that I had written earlier about my little brother who had died. He was born in February. Doug's son was born in February.

1:36:10 Drew Wow.

1:36:11 Oleander And the album was coming out in February. So we decided to pay tribute to the three and entitle it February Son.

1:36:19 Drew You know what I like about these guys? There is a distinct reason behind what they do. Most bands, you go, what's the reason? They go, whatever it means to you. We hate that.

1:36:29 Oleander That was us back in the 80s. This is us in the 90s. Unfortunately, we've been given the opportunity to do this.

1:36:34 Caller What about your brother?

1:36:36 Oleander Well, he like I was born allergic to everything. I just lucked out and was born to be allergic to one less thing. And he died of spinal meningitis. He had major complications of every kind you can imagine.

1:36:52 Drew Because when he gave the antibiotics, he became allergic.

1:36:54 Oleander Oh, you know, everything. And you know, like a year later, they realized how they could have saved his life. You know, and I was, you know, I was on deathbed taking three allergy shots per day for 12 years and whatnot. You know, so.

1:37:08 Adam Wow. Yeah. How old was your brother when he passed?

1:37:10 Oleander Well, he was three and I was six and he was pretty much all I had. You know, the complete fractured, splintered, dysfunctional family. Yeah. Loveline show. Living Loveline show. And so we had Clinton.

1:37:24 Adam We had a meningitis call last night.

1:37:26 Oleander Yeah.

1:37:26 Adam Yeah.

1:37:27 Oleander Thank you for asking those two questions, by the way. I really appreciate it.

1:37:31 Adam Cassie.

1:37:32 Oleander Yeah.

1:37:32 Adam You're 17.

1:37:34 Caller What's up?

1:37:35 Caller I also had a question for Oleander.

1:37:38 Oleander We're on a roll here. Thank you.

1:37:39 Caller Yeah. Well, first of all, I saw you guys last Wednesday at the Palladium as I thought you were awesome.

1:37:44 Oleander Thank you very much.

1:37:45 Caller You're welcome. I was wondering how did you get your start and how long did it take you to get up to the top? And do you like did it fall into your lap or did you have to like...

1:37:54 Oleander Oh, no, no. First, let me start by saying if you're thinking of starting a band, stay in school. If you're in a band, stay in school. If you're even remotely interested in the music business, stay in school first, don't sacrifice relationships, and then like gradually take the advice of everyone else who might be lucky enough to have made it. We worked very hard, hit brick walls, and sacrificed much for a pipe dream that just so happened to come true so far.

1:38:24 Adam How long has the band been together?

1:38:26 Oleander Doug and I have been playing together for ten years. Doug I and Rick have been playing together for seven. Doug I, Rick and Fred, the complete band, about four. And we're not for the grace of God and for, you know, some very, very fortunate things to have happened. We would not be here today.

1:38:43 Adam All right, good question there, Cassie. We got to take ourselves a quick time out. We'll be back with, well, by the grace of God, with more Oleander after this.

1:38:55 Caller Loveline, we'll be right back. Loveline, we'll be right back.

1:39:18 Caller Loveline was brought to you by Car Toys.

1:39:33 Adam Anderson is back in the good graces.

1:39:35 Oleander Brilliant. He is the man again.

1:39:37 Caller We now love Anderson.

1:39:38 Adam That does mean it's the end of the show. Oleander, thank you very much.

1:39:43 Oleander Thank you for having us.

1:39:44 Adam February sun, everybody. Please go out and get that CD. Good band, good guys, and it was real nice meeting you.

1:39:50 Oleander You too.

1:39:51 Adam We appreciate it, and hopefully we'll see you in here soon. And until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying, mahalo.

1:40:00 Caller This has been Loveline. The views expressed on Loveline are not necessarily those of the staff, the management, or the sponsors of this radio station. And you're probably not the views of Westwood One Entertainment. Loveline is produced by Ann Wilkin Zingal. Now, please listen to this station longer.

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Tuesday, November 16, 1999