Episode 1000754887789

0:52 Voiceover One love, Loveline, is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Losing her discretion, advised. Now, here's Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191 with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

1:08 Adam Hey, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-191, fax number 310-854-4455. Dr. Drew is a board-certified physician and addiction medicine specialist. Does it seem like we're here too soon?

1:27 Drew Oftentimes, it feels that way.

1:28 Adam You don't feel that way tonight?

1:30 Drew Not especially.

1:30 Adam I really feel like I just laughed.

1:32 Drew You know, I feel that way when we have that damn radio, the television thing during the day. Then it's like, oh, be prepared. Yeah, I know.

1:38 Adam All right.

1:39 Drew If you're feeling that way tonight, imagine tomorrow.

1:40 Adam All right, I'll see you tomorrow night then.

1:42 Drew All right, let's go.

1:43 All right.

1:45 Adam Bucky Lasek, Chad Muska and Andy Macdonald are all here from representing the Invert. Is it Invert? Did I get it right?

1:54 That's what it's called. That's right.

1:56 Adam Hold on there, boys. You guys got to get way up on those mics. There you go.

2:04 We're representing skateboarding.

2:06 Adam That's right. Skateboarding to me, or it seems, I'm 35. I couldn't stand on an ironing board if it was flat on the ground without falling off. But it seems to me that it got really hot somewhere in the later midders, later 70s. Then it just died out somewhere in the 80s. And then it started to inch back up. And it's probably at an all time high.

2:31 Skyrocketing.

2:31 Adam About now. And I don't know if that's the X Games that did it or Mountain Dew commercials or what the hell is going on.

2:40 It's just popularity with kids accepting it more, you know. And I don't think it has to do too much with the mainstream, really. It blew up on the underground. And now that the mainstream is focusing on it, it's blowing up more in that way. And people are accepting it more because of the mainstream. But I think it blew up just in fact because of the kids were accepting it more. And more kids were starting to do it, you know. And you could promote skateboarding as much as you want. But it doesn't mean that kids are going to accept it, you know. It's just a lot more people had a following of it and started doing it.

3:08 Adam But the whole extreme sport thing now is a sport. I mean, whereas before it was more of a spectacle. It was sort of like...

3:16 Definitely television helped. Like from 95, the first year of the X Games, it kind of brought skateboarding into people's living rooms where, you know, skateboarding on TV, it was never there before, maybe once in the 70s.

3:29 Adam Also, they're doing stuff that's just a little more exciting than when Dr. Drew had the banana board with the Chicago trucks and the Cadillac wheels.

3:38 Drew Metal wheels.

3:39 Drew was shredding it up without ball bearings.

3:41 Adam Drew had a black knight with the clay wheels. Seriously, you didn't have ball bearings?

3:49 Drew Clay wheels were a big advance. What are you talking about? That was a big deal.

3:51 Adam You're saying the ball bearings were invented in your lifetime? Metal wheels.

3:54 Drew Metal wheels with big hard rubber edges.

3:57 Jesus Christ. They weren't too smooth.

3:58 Adam Well, it was pretty much just taking wheels from skates and strapping them on a piece of wood. You know, it's amazing, and I can't figure out when I watch this stuff. I never was a very good skateboarder, but I was all right at BMX. I used to race BMX bikes when I was a kid. But the stuff people are doing now, we couldn't have even dreamt of 20 years ago. I'm thinking to myself, are the kids stronger or are they tougher? Or the equipment is a little better.

4:30 The world is progressive.

4:31 Adam Yeah, but I think what it is is somebody does it, and then you realize, hey, it can be done. And then before you know it, everyone's doing it. And then the guy who did that one first has moved on to his next trick.

4:42 Guest All it takes is one person to step up.

4:44 Drew Pretty much every sport goes through that kind of evolution. Basketball in the 50s, take a look at that compared to now.

4:50 Yeah, it's just the world. Electronics, look how much electronics has evolved in the last 10 years. It's everything. People evolve, and once they reach a certain point, they're not satisfied with it, and you want to keep going and evolving to something higher and better.

5:02 Adam But I gotta believe in any sport, there's certain stages, such as basketball. You know, you look at the 50s, you got some, you know, slow, short white guys doing set shots from the perimeter. Now you got the dunking and everything, but it's probably going to slow down for a little while now.

5:20 Drew Yeah, well, it's the limits of the human body.

5:22 Adam Right.

5:23 Drew And that's what you're dealing with.

5:24 But the nice thing about skateboarding is that it's limitless, pretty much as far as the tricks that you can do with a skateboard, as opposed to a bike where you have handlebars or inline skates where you're strapped on. A skateboarding, you're pretty much only limited by your imagination as far as what you can do with the board.

5:40 Guest A couple years ago, it was pretty limited though. You didn't think, you know, people were doing like late show bits and stuff like that. And now look at it.

5:46 Not that they would know what that means.

5:48 Guest They're doing a late show bit. You wouldn't even think they're doing that nowadays.

5:51 Adam I wouldn't?

5:52 Guest Nah.

5:52 Adam Alright, you're right. I thought about it on the drive in, but I realized, no, that's insanity. What are you thinking about?

5:59 You wouldn't even think about that these days.

6:00 Adam What is the late show bit? Oh, yeah. What is that?

6:04 It's like he's busting out some tricks.

6:06 Oh, I see.

6:06 Yeah, it's technical.

6:08 Adam Listen, here's all I want to say, and I say this to guys who come in here from every sport, and especially skateboarding, you guys should be wearing cups. Because I see not necessarily what you do on the half pipe, but what you do on the railing.

6:22 Caller The handrails.

6:23 Caller Talk to Chad about that one.

6:24 Guest Yeah, you talk to the boss guy over here.

6:26 Caller Hey, I've been doing it strong for a long time, and I haven't gone that route yet, and I'm not about to. Knock out some wood.

6:31 Adam But is there some sort of machismo to not wearing enough padding? Because I would be completely padded up.

6:38 Caller These guys ride vert, the big half pipes, the vertical ramps, and almost every vert skater wears pads. I'm a hardcore street skateboarder, and I don't wear any type of pads whatsoever.

6:47 Adam But in a way, you need them as much or maybe more. I mean, you may not be getting the kind of air.

6:53 Guest They restrict you a lot, though.

6:55 Adam They do?

6:56 Caller How much is a cup going to hurt you?

6:59 Adam How much is a cup going to slow you down?

7:00 Caller I've thought about it before, but I've never gotten...

7:02 Drew If it does, you guys ought to advance some new technology that keeps everything tucked away without restricting your movement, right?

7:07 Caller Yeah, maybe.

7:09 Drew It's part of the movement of forward.

7:10 Caller Dr. Drew's next big invention.

7:12 Adam Drew, really, as a doctor, can you demand that they wear a cup, and they could be arrested if they didn't?

7:19 Drew It's a great idea.

7:21 Adam I really would go with the cup. Anything involving a railing, if I just use a railing, not even with a skateboard, just put my hand on it, I'll go ahead and put a cup on.

7:30 Caller Drew, you know that, right?

7:31 Drew Yeah, you spend your whole life thinking about that kind of thing.

7:34 Adam Yeah.

7:34 Drew Protection for the huevos.

7:35 Adam Wear it in the shower, wear it to go down and get the mail. I put that cup on. I'm telling you, it doesn't slow you down that much and it'll fill out the package, especially if you put a sock or something actually on the penis. All right, so let's take ourselves some phone calls. Again, it's at the Anaheim Convention Center this week. This is Friday, Saturday and Sunday. And because we have a lot of pot-smoking listeners, the Anaheim Convention Center is in Anaheim. All right?

8:07 That's correct.

8:07 Adam Otherwise, it would be really confusing. And we'll speak to Jeff, who's 16.

8:13 Jeff? Yeah. Hi, Adam.

8:15 Adam What's up?

8:16 When I was having sex with my girlfriend last week, I was done really quick. And it was my first time, and it was her first time. And I want to know if I get some stamina, or does it just stay like that?

8:32 Adam That's it. That's it until you're well into your 50s, and then you won't be able to achieve an erection.

8:39 Really?

8:40 Adam Yep, that's it.

8:42 Guest Should I take care of business before he goes in there?

8:45 Adam That's something I often suggest. I think the reason guys orgasm so quickly their first time out is because they're so anxious to tell their buddies they finally got laid, that they just want to get to a phone. If she'd let you make a phone call while you're having sex, I think you might have to rely on your boys. Hey, dude, guess where I am. Nope, guess again.

9:08 I mean, because when I masturbate, I can go up to about five minutes, but when I'm with the woman...

9:14 Caller That's because you can slow down when you want.

9:15 Adam If you masturbate, you can go up to a day. You just take your hand off your penis.

9:22 Drew The day is about your limit, though, isn't it?

9:24 Adam They hope for me. Yes. What? Hey, Jeff, it will get better. It will. Is this your girlfriend? Yeah.

9:33 Drew You'll figure it out.

9:34 Adam You'll work it out. Are you using protection? Yeah.

9:38 Drew What are you doing? What are you using?

9:40 Condom.

9:40 Adam Okay.

9:41 Drew Keep that morning after pill around, will you?

9:43 Adam All right.

9:43 Drew Condom break once in a while.

9:44 Okay.

9:45 Adam All right. Don't worry.

9:46 Guest It'll work out.

9:47 Okay.

9:48 Adam It's never gonna work out. Sheila, you're 23. What's up?

9:54 Caller How are you guys doing tonight?

9:55 Adam We're all doing good as far as I know.

9:58 Caller Hey, uh, those skateboarder guys in the studio there, I'd have to really agree with what you said about the cup because, uh, those guys got, like, the nicest legs. It would be such a shame to ruin that package.

10:11 Caller I like that.

10:12 Caller Um, I've been dating this guy. Now, he told me he was a virgin, but I don't really know because he is 24. I suppose that's possible, though. And, uh, he's got, like, a real strict family or whatever, but, man, we've been messing around a little bit. That's how I got him into, like, some real sex. But he won't let me perform it on him. He just wants to do it on me. And, I mean, he does it, like, all the time, like, three or four times a day.

10:34 Drew Are you complaining?

10:37 Caller Most girls wouldn't be complaining.

10:39 Adam Does it sound suspicious, though?

10:41 Caller I mean, I'm, like, kind of worried because, I mean, uh, you know, I mean, he, like, masturbates when he does it, which is okay.

10:45 Adam I don't mind that.

10:46 Drew You know, that's cool.

10:47 Caller It's fun to watch, but...

10:48 Adam Really?

10:48 Caller I think so, yeah.

10:49 Adam Oh, I guess he's got the remote in the other hand. I was trying to do the math there. And it just sets the beer down.

10:55 I watch no TV.

10:56 Caller Oh, I see, yeah.

10:59 Caller But, you know, I mean, I got worried and I started thinking about it.

11:01 Adam He masturbates while he does it to the point of orgasm?

11:06 Caller Right.

11:07 Adam Really?

11:08 Caller Does he let you see it?

11:09 Caller Yeah.

11:10 Adam So, he, he, and everything's...

11:12 Caller I don't know if he knows I'm watching it.

11:13 Adam Everything's okay with him down there?

11:16 Caller With me?

11:17 Adam No, with him.

11:18 Caller I mean, I have some, some kind of...

11:20 Adam No gross, no deformities. No, no, man.

11:23 Caller It looks nice.

11:24 Well, you know...

11:25 Drew What do you mean you don't know if he, what is it, what do you mean you don't know if he knows you're watching?

11:29 Well, you know...

11:30 Drew How does that work?

11:31 Caller He knows. I've never really brought it to his attention.

11:34 Drew She'll smoke a little pot, doesn't she?

11:35 Adam Hey, Sheila? You smoke a lot of weed?

11:38 No, not at all.

11:39 Drew Really?

11:40 Adam Right, yeah. Where'd he get that weed laugh?

11:44 Guest Oh, my God.

11:49 Adam Remember that James Bond villain, the big bald black guy?

11:52 Drew Cola nut.

11:53 Adam Yeah, he's talking about the Cola nut.

11:55 Caller Hey, where's Dr. Drew?

11:56 Drew I'm right here.

11:57 Caller Hey, man, I love your voice.

11:58 Drew Thank you, Sheila.

11:59 Caller You look so sexy on the phone.

12:00 Adam Hey, Sheila, I asked this... Why don't you just confront him? Just like, hey, what's up? You're helping me out. I'm going to help you out.

12:07 Caller Do you guys think he's gay?

12:09 Drew No.

12:09 Adam No.

12:10 Caller You don't think so?

12:11 Drew No. No. Should we gamble?

12:14 Caller He wouldn't be doing the oral sex thing I knew if he was gay.

12:18 Adam Gay men are scared of vaginas. That's why...

12:20 Caller Like, if it's not experimenting, trying to figure out...

12:22 Adam Listen, I'm straight. I wouldn't go down there for more than twice a day. I'm just down there three, four times a day.

12:29 Guest He's just satisfied on doing you, I think, and maybe... I don't know. Are you good at what you're doing there or what?

12:35 Adam She's not doing anything.

12:36 Caller She's just holding the girl.

12:37 Drew He wouldn't know.

12:38 Caller Maybe he's scared about how he's going to perform or something. You know what I mean?

12:41 Adam Sheila, he may... But he's a virgin, so he doesn't have like a ward or something down there, does he?

12:46 Drew A 24-year-old where she notices how strict the family is. 24, she doesn't even know the family yet.

12:52 Caller Well, I mean, I just... I just know like what he tells me. I mean, they're like holy rollers. His dad's a minister or something.

12:57 Drew Okay, okay.

12:58 Adam So he's got some issues, this guy.

13:00 Caller Right. I don't know, man.

13:01 Caller I mean, he seems pretty normal.

13:03 Drew He may be a good guy. He may be fine, but he's going to have a little issues around this stuff and that's all right. He'll work it out.

13:09 Caller So how do I get some penetration out of him? I mean, how long am I going to have to wait? Should I pressure him or what?

13:17 Caller Maybe he doesn't think you're the right girl. Maybe he's waiting for the right girl.

13:20 Drew You know, I don't want people to...

13:21 Caller What do you look like?

13:21 Drew Wait a minute. Hang on a second.

13:22 Caller That's kind of hurt my feelings. I'm the right girl.

13:24 Drew Hang on a second. I think for a 23-year-old to make it clear to a 24-year-old boyfriend what she wants out of the relationship is fine. Yes. Because she's not a 16-year-old pressuring a 14-year-old.

13:33 Caller No.

13:34 Drew I think it's fine to apply a little pressure. That's what you expect from the relationship. If he can't go there, then this may not be the right relationship.

13:40 Adam Does he drink at all?

13:43 Caller I mean, we drink occasionally.

13:44 Adam Yeah. That's your fast ticket to some loving with this guy. You got to get him drunk.

13:50 Caller Man, I tried that. Well, that's like how I first got him to break the ice. It worked. But I feel kind of guilty.

13:57 Like, I don't want to be doing this kind of driving.

13:59 Caller All right.

13:59 Adam Sheila, I'm telling you the way to do it.

14:02 Caller All right.

14:03 Drew He's already not a virgin anyway. A technic in the eyes of God.

14:05 Adam Well, you know what, my favorite part about religion is this sort of backwards retarded approach to it, which is I won't get oral sex. I'll just yank myself off while I'm going down on a chick. And God will dismiss that as harmless. You know what I mean? I mean, listen.

14:23 Caller You might want to be married or maybe that's the way his upbringing is.

14:26 Adam I know. But people think they're going to get in on a technicality. To me, that's more deviant. You going down on somebody and grabbing yourself in the process. It's even more deviant.

14:39 Drew It's like the ones that go for the butt love to maintain their virginity.

14:44 Adam Right. Ryan?

14:45 Yeah.

14:46 Adam You're 19.

14:47 Caller Yeah.

14:48 Caller What's up?

14:49 Caller I got a quick question, actually.

14:51 Caller I was wondering what exactly is a garter belt?

14:54 Caller And why is my girlfriend flipped out that she found one in my room?

14:58 Adam Well, how come you don't know what one is if it was in your room?

15:01 Caller Because I don't know how it got there. It just happened. She happened to be in my room and she picked it up and I was like, she's like, is this yours? And I was like, is it yours? She was like, no. I was like, okay. Well, what is it?

15:12 Drew Is it like something from a wedding?

15:14 Caller No, I don't know what it's from.

15:16 Adam You don't know what a garter belt is?

15:18 Caller No, I don't know. What's the purpose of it?

15:20 Caller It's for a wedding only, right?

15:21 Drew Well, the fancy one. They used to be to hold up stockings.

15:24 Caller I mean, is that some kind of kinky sex toy? You think I'm cheating on her or something?

15:27 Adam She thinks you're cheating on her. Well, yeah. It's a piece of lingerie now.

15:31 Caller That's from a girl that's not hers.

15:33 Adam Right.

15:33 Caller Obviously, she thinks another girl brought it there.

15:35 Adam It's not quite panties, but it may be a little more than a bra. Somewhere between a panty and a bra. Except for, there's a sort of novelty aspect to it, which is you could have went to a Shakey's or something, and a piano player could have been wearing it around his hand or his upper arm or something, or like it's a wedding item. Guys will hang it like a real white trash, guys, will hang it off the rear view. As a matter of fact, that's really how you know white trash. The more ass you have hanging off the rear view, whether it be the Playboy Air Freshener, that's kind of black trash, the Playboy Air Freshener. But the white trash would be like garter belt, graduation tassel, just sort of debris hanging off. Stuff that you put on your rear view to advertise what kind of cat you are. So, uh, Ryan, have you been to a wedding lately? No, I haven't. How about Shakey's or Farrell's?

16:30 Caller No, that's what she's thinking, and then she's thinking that I'm cheating on her. What I really want to know is how do I convince her?

16:35 Adam How could it have gotten into your room?

16:38 Caller I don't know.

16:38 Caller I mean, I have a maid that cleans my house, and I have a mom, my sister, maybe someone. My mom brings my laundry in every day, and maybe it got caught up in there.

16:45 Caller Is that one of those maids that cleans in her bra and underwear?

16:50 Caller Yeah, one of those, yeah.

16:51 Guest Hold your sister.

16:53 Caller We pay extra for her.

16:54 Adam Hey, Ryan, come up on the mic a little, Bucky.

16:56 Guest How old is your sister? Can you hear me?

16:59 Adam No, yeah. Everybody get closer to the place they talk. So, Ryan, we want to know how old your sister is.

17:07 Caller My sister, she's fourteen.

17:11 Drew Why are we spending a lot of time on that?

17:12 Adam I don't know. All right, Ryan, if you truly don't know where it came from, just look her in the eye and tell her to get over it. All right? You sure you didn't cheat?

17:21 Caller No, I'm definitely not. Unless someone else did it for me.

17:24 Adam Okay. You know, I just came up with an idea. We never talked about it on the show. It would be diabolical if Ryan did cheat. And I guess to have a garter belt in there, you'd have to cheat like a saloon girl or something.

17:38 Caller Well, he was saying something about the maid. I was thinking maybe it was one of those...

17:41 Drew You have to be cheating with the bride.

17:42 Adam Or the bride. But here's what I think would be diabolical.

17:45 Drew That's also the weird logic on the girlfriend. The bride's the one wearing the garter belt unless she throws it to one of the guys.

17:50 Adam Right.

17:51 Drew What does that have to do with cheating?

17:52 Adam Quiet down and listen to my diabolical scheme here. If Ryan knows that his girlfriend listens to the show, it would be very diabolical for him to call in and say, what is a garter belt? Someone found one in my room. I don't know what it is.

18:08 Drew You know what?

18:08 Adam I don't know what she's talking about.

18:09 Drew He would start calling. I had that thought that that's what he was doing.

18:12 Adam Ryan's guilty.

18:12 Drew I actually had that thought.

18:13 Adam It'd be pretty good. Like if you knew your girlfriend drove home from work and listened to the show at a certain time or something, that would be beautiful.

18:21 Drew So Ryan's girlfriend, if you were a regular listener, he'd be warning.

18:27 Adam Just assume he's guilty. Deessa.

18:31 That's me.

18:33 Adam You're 17.

18:34 Caller Yeah.

18:34 Adam What's up?

18:35 Caller Okay. About two years ago, this was really embarrassing, but okay. I started like dreaming about these, these guys, right? And I didn't really know who they were at first. And then my friend was talking to me and it, it, it, it turns out that they're in sync, right? And I don't listen to their kind of that kind of music or anything like that.

18:58 Adam Yeah. So you're, you're dreaming about in sync.

19:03 Caller You make it sound so weird, but, and it's like really embarrassing. And I told one of my friends, yeah, and she totally decided like cracking up at me. And I'm the kind of person that listens to like DMX and, and Jay-Z and stuff. And so I was, I've been so embarrassed. It's been going on. It's like, it's like a re, not really occurring, but it like picks up. Like we're left off every night.

19:24 Adam Drew had this phase too. Wasn't Backstreet Boys or 98 Degrees? What, who were you obsessed with about six months ago?

19:30 Drew 98 Degrees.

19:30 Caller I'm not obsessed though.

19:32 Drew What, how do you even know who these guys are if you don't listen to them?

19:35 Caller Well, I, that's the thing is that, I mean, my, my friend, she knows who they are because she has a little sister that's like 13, you know?

19:41 Drew Were you into that kind of stuff when you were 12, 13, 14?

19:43 Caller Uh-uh.

19:44 Caller You've been watching too much MTV?

19:45 Caller I went through a phase as a kid.

19:47 Caller All right.

19:47 Drew Well, you're sort of regressing for some, you were sort of reaching back into that period and working some stuff through that you left behind.

19:54 Caller It would go away.

19:55 Drew It will go away. And why do you be embarrassed about some aspect of self that's unreasonable?

20:01 Caller Because they're little guys that go around and make little things.

20:06 Drew All right.

20:07 Caller But it's okay. I'd be embarrassed too.

20:09 Guest Don't share it then. They're grotesque.

20:10 Caller Yeah.

20:10 Adam Keep it, keep it under your hat.

20:11 Drew They're grotesque?

20:13 Caller Yeah. Why? I don't like them at all.

20:15 Caller You dream about them.

20:16 Adam You know, when 17-year-olds protest a lot about not liking someone though, you know what that means.

20:21 Caller They love them.

20:21 Adam They love them. Admit you love them. Admit you love them, especially the one guy in this big sweater guy. I can't figure. You know what I'd love to do?

20:32 Guest What's up with the guy with the white braids and whatever that is?

20:36 Caller Bucky secretly dreams about it too.

20:38 Guest What is up with that guy? I just want to kill him.

20:41 Adam You know, I'll tell you what would be the greatest game show ever. You get 98 Degrees, you get Backstreet Boys, you get N-Sync and you mix them all up. And then you give some guy like Drew...

20:52 Drew Matches them up. Rebuild the band.

20:54 Caller Yeah, rebuild the band.

20:56 Adam You'd be like... and now, you know you wouldn't need two hunky guys in like the same band, you know? So I'd grab the one, you know, one guy with the boyish charm and the one hunky guy, and then the one sort of urban street bad boy guy. That's how I would start. And then some I might recognize and be able to move around.

21:13 Caller And you've got the ugly dogs, you've got to pick them less, get lucky with them.

21:18 Adam That'd be a great game show.

21:19 Caller I'd go back a little bit and get Menudo, maybe.

21:22 Adam Yeah, but that's easy, because you've just got all the Mexicans over there.

21:26 Caller That's too easy.

21:27 Adam Yeah, it'd be too easy. But, uh, Drew, we met... did we meet?

21:32 Drew Backstreet Boys, wasn't it?

21:33 Adam Backstreet Boys, yeah.

21:34 Drew I think we met all these ago. InSync was on the TV show.

21:37 Adam Really?

21:37 Drew Yeah, or 93. It's one of them, wasn't it?

21:39 Adam You know what I didn't know about all those bands? Um, I thought, and I'll include the Spice Girls in this... Well, would you shut up, Drew? I know that.

21:49 Caller Idiot.

21:50 Adam Shut Drew's mic off.

21:52 Caller Enough of him.

21:53 Adam Shut his mic, please. They're good. What I didn't know is I thought it was all 12, 13, 14-year-old chicks that were into these groups, you know, whether it be Backstreet Boys or even Spice Girls or whatever. I didn't know five, six, and seven-year-olds were buying the bulk of the records or at least getting their parents to buy it. Because when they show the concert or they show the whatever, obviously, there's a bunch of 15-year-olds in the audience. But the kids, the little kids, okay, turn Drew's mic back on because he's agreeing with me now.

22:28 Drew I can tell you, my daughter's into it. Yeah. Into it.

22:31 Adam You know, the biggest, like, I'll bet you the biggest Spice Girl record buying is done by six, seven, and eight-year-old girls who get their folks to go get it.

22:40 Drew Yeah, it's like, yeah, six to nine.

22:43 Guest Hey, my little girl, my little girl is in the zombie. Zombie, Manson, seriously, like, she'll be crying her eyes out and just, you put Manson or the zombie on it, she's two.

22:53 Adam Oh, all right, that's there. She should be taken away, right? That's your fault. All right, we have the skaters from the Invert 99 here, which is in Anaheim at the Convention Center this Friday, Saturday and Sunday. We're going to take a little break and when we come back, we'll speak to, oh, Jesus, Drew. This is great radio. Let's get right. We have a call that's so exciting, we can't talk about it. You know what I mean? Like those sofa commercials where the prices are so low, they can't quote them on television.

23:28 Drew Yes.

23:28 Adam That's what's going on here. We have such a titillating, exciting call that the FCC forbids us from talking about it. Right, Drew?

23:35 Drew Absolutely.

23:36 Adam All right. So we'll be back after this.

23:38 Caller You have five seconds.

23:39 Caller Loveline, Dr. Drew, to Back in a Minute, one.

23:54 Caller This is Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio 100.7 The Bucks.

24:08 Adam It is the Loveline of Adam Corolla, then it's Drew. The Violin Femmes will be in here tomorrow night. A band that's been around for million years, I've never met them. Have you, Drew?

24:20 Drew I think once many years ago, like 12 years ago. But I wouldn't swear to it.

24:25 Adam All right. Bucky Lasek, Chad Muska and Andy... Gio. Andy Macdonald. Macdonald. I was going to say Macdonald. Andy Macdonald. They're all here, all professional skaters, all representing the Invert 99, which is going to go down in Anaheim at the Anaheim Convention Center Friday, Saturday and Sunday. And I'm guessing Anaheim, that's probably pretty big. That's in Orange County, right?

24:49 Caller Yeah.

24:49 Adam That's big, big skate stuff over there, isn't it? I mean, that's a good skate town, isn't it?

24:54 Caller Yeah, a lot of companies and peace cities involved in the industry.

24:58 Adam What is it, like, you know, nationally, is it, you know, the further inland you get, the less people are into skating?

25:05 Caller No, that's just the main, that's where the companies are located in the, in the magazines. And so it gets the most hype in that area. But, I mean, there's skateboarders everywhere. Just because it's not covered on TV and stuff doesn't mean that it's, it's not there, you know?

25:18 Adam But what would you say, what would you guys collectively say is sort of the capital?

25:23 Caller The further you get away from the water, California, of course.

25:25 Drew The further you get away from the water, the less things you do on a board.

25:27 Adam Really?

25:28 Drew Think about it. Water skis, surfing, skateboarding.

25:31 Adam Right.

25:31 Drew Move away from water.

25:33 Caller You can't compare the two at all, really, because skateboarding is an urban sport. It's not a beach-oriented sport. It's something you could do anywhere. You can jump on your skateboard and go outside your house, and it's there for you, you know?

25:44 Adam You can do it, but I think there's probably more people who are just involved in that lifestyle in general. But yeah, I know, well, actually, skateboarding is more city now than it ever was before, because there's this whole sort of guerrilla skating thing going on with the railings and the stairs and the whole thing.

26:04 Caller Most cities are by water.

26:05 Caller But yeah, it originated at the beach. Surfers, when the surf was flat, nailed their skates to the two by four, and that's where it all started.

26:13 Caller Which is years and years and years ago, which now it's more of an urban type sport, and kids are doing it across. I mean, I've been to South Africa, and there's hundreds of skateboards in South Africa. Japan, there's skateboards in Japan.

26:24 Adam But they're all from Long Beach. That's because you don't know. They just got off the plane before you.

26:28 Caller Yeah, yeah, yeah.

26:29 Adam They were saying the same thing about you.

26:32 Caller Yeah, so I mean, but no, it's popular in Orange County, in Southern California, and it's the capital, obviously, because that's where all the major magazines are located at and all that stuff.

26:42 Adam Well, the X Games were in San Francisco last year, right? Yeah. But they're not always in San Francisco, are they?

26:48 Caller They were in Newport, Rhode Island the first two years, and then they moved to San Diego for two years.

26:54 Caller The X Trials are everywhere. They do them across America.

26:57 Adam Where are they having it next year, or is it going to be like the Olympics, where cities make bids and things like that?

27:02 Caller Yeah, cities are already making bids.

27:04 Adam Seemed to work out pretty good last year in San Francisco. Brad?

27:09 Yeah.

27:09 Adam You're 16?

27:10 Caller Yeah.

27:10 Adam What's up?

27:13 Caller When me and my girlfriend have sex, she can orgasm up to three times, and I don't orgasm at all.

27:22 Adam You think she's stolen one of yours?

27:24 Caller Maybe.

27:25 Adam Maybe?

27:26 Caller Maybe.

27:28 Drew Why don't I believe Brad right away?

27:29 Adam Really?

27:30 Caller Yeah, I know.

27:31 Adam Hey, Brad?

27:32 Caller Yeah.

27:32 Adam Why doesn't Drew believe you?

27:35 Caller Because he's a doctor.

27:37 Caller Okay.

27:37 Caller All right.

27:39 Adam Hey, Brad? Yeah. Have you had other girlfriends?

27:42 Caller Yeah, but I haven't had texts with them.

27:44 Adam Okay. How about masturbating? Does that work?

27:47 Caller Yeah. Okay.

27:49 Adam It's not the world's dumbest question there, Brad. Don't make me put you back on hold.

27:54 Caller Okay.

27:54 Adam Wise ass. No, mental note. Don't name the kid Brad.

27:58 Caller All right.

27:59 Adam There's always some wise ass named Brad. You know what I'm talking about?

28:02 Caller All right.

28:04 Adam What is it? Using a condom? Yeah. All right. I'm still with Brad.

28:11 Guest How old is his girlfriend?

28:12 Adam Sixteen.

28:13 Guest How old are you?

28:14 Caller Sixteen.

28:15 Adam And is this the first girl you've had sex with?

28:18 Caller Yeah.

28:18 Drew How long have you been with her?

28:20 Caller Almost a year.

28:21 Adam And she has an orgasm what way?

28:25 Caller Through sex.

28:26 Adam Through sex.

28:27 Caller Or oral sex, sir.

28:29 Adam Or oral sex. Or what?

28:33 Caller All right.

28:33 Adam So how long do you have sex for? You just keep having sex and you can't have an orgasm?

28:37 Caller Mm-hmm.

28:38 Adam Has she ever tried to give you an orgasm orally?

28:41 Caller Yeah.

28:42 Adam And that doesn't work either?

28:44 Caller Hmm.

28:45 Adam All right. All right. Here's my theory on Brad. I know Drew's got a vibe about Brad. But let's say Brad isn't telling the truth. Who cares? There's other 16-year-old guys who are having their first go-round sexually, who are having a little difficulty in this department. And wouldn't you say for a lot of young guys, it's sort of one extreme or the other?

29:07 Caller Yes.

29:08 Adam Either, you know, the gun goes off before they even pull it out of the jeans, or they can't achieve an orgasm no matter what. And it's something you go through, right?

29:18 Caller Yep. All right.

29:19 Adam So what do you do? You just work it out?

29:21 Caller Yeah.

29:22 Caller Well, I mean, his girlfriend might be trying to... after she has the orgasm, if she stops him or what, you know what I mean? That could be, you know, after she has hers, maybe she tells him to stop her, you know, whatever. That could be something, too.

29:32 Caller Yeah.

29:33 Adam He has a girlfriend. Things seem to be steady with her. So just work it out.

29:38 Caller It will work out.

29:38 Guest Seems like he might be in the wrong frame of mind or something.

29:42 Adam Yeah, just for life in general.

29:45 Caller He's just nervous.

29:46 Caller All right.

29:47 Adam Just relax, work it out. Everything will be cool. And once you get your first one off, then you're good. I mean, that's it. Then you have the confidence of Samson after that. I was just informed, by the way, the fabulous Man Show has just hit the air on Comedy Central. Whatever. Anderson had the good sense to remind me.

30:08 Drew My wife Susan was staying up to watch the Man Show tonight.

30:10 Adam It's a good Man Show.

30:11 Drew Which one is it?

30:13 Adam Show 113.

30:16 Drew I don't know.

30:17 Adam I had to yell at everybody. You know, here there's parts of this business I can't figure out. Parts of every business I can't figure out. Which is, we did this Man Show on Comedy Central. We did 22 episodes and we had a big board. Me and Jimmy and Daniel, my two partners in this office. And on the wall, there were all the shows marked and with all the numbers of which show it was over it. Except for show number one was 101. And show number two was 102. And I was yelling at everybody, how can it be 101 and we've never done a goddamn show before? It has to be show number one. It's like when I lose my virginity, that's not chick 101. That's number one. And my first job, that's my first job. It's not 101. It's 101. That's what I was singing. And so of course then show 13 is show 113. And I was like, why can't we just call it 13? We wish we could, we just can't. But no one would ever give me an answer. So I don't know what tonight is, 114 or something. But there's plenty of comedy. Hey, Drew, what if you just took a pot in a pan and bang them together? Couldn't you get more? Couldn't you get more noise out of there? Yeah, tomorrow we're going to do a Loveline, the TV show. And we'll do a number 5058. Even though we've done 347, according to the number, it'll be 5058. That makes it real easy to remember. We know, so Drew, when you want to know when the Long Beach Dub All Stars were on the show, you'll know that, of course, 5058 makes perfect sense.

32:01 Drew Howie Mandel would be 4036.

32:03 Adam There you go. You guys see the pattern now? Not quite. Not quite. It's easy. We don't either. You know, here's the thing about TV. This is what it is. Now I've figured it out. Everyone gets paid way too much in television. This is it. And there's way too many people employed. I'm telling you, you could fire three quarters of the people that were standing around and no one would know it. It's a bunch of guys sitting around and eating.

32:29 Drew Catering tips.

32:30 Adam Constantly eating.

32:32 Drew Looking for stuff to do.

32:32 Adam Oh, man.

32:34 Drew Oh no, doing stuff. Running around doing stuff.

32:35 Adam Eating.

32:36 Drew But stuff doesn't need to be done.

32:37 Adam Yeah. And I'll tell you though, seriously, if that food ain't out there, people are pissed off. A lot of people eating. Everyone's getting paid way too much money, so they try to make the job just a little more complicated than it actually is. You notice that goes on in TV, Drew? Too many people worrying too much about too little. And I think that's where the Show 5058 comes in, because now...

33:02 Caller Somebody came up with some crazy schemes of ours.

33:05 Drew Well, there's probably two people in charge of numbering the shows.

33:07 Caller There you go.

33:08 Adam And they can never be fired because they're the only ones who know the cockamamie system.

33:12 Caller The code, yeah.

33:12 Adam That's right. Okay. Now, where the hell were we?

33:15 Caller Yeah, let's get back to this.

33:16 Adam We gotta get back to it. You're right. We have to prioritize. Did I mention that the Man Show was on tonight?

33:22 Caller Yeah, yeah.

33:23 Adam Addison.

33:24 Caller Hello.

33:24 Adam You're 13 years old.

33:27 Caller Hello. Is Chad?

33:30 Caller Yo, what's up, my man? How are you doing?

33:31 Caller I'm honored to speak to you.

33:33 Caller Hey, I have a question.

33:35 Caller Yeah.

33:36 Caller My name is Addison, of course. You know Ape, right?

33:40 Caller From Shorty's?

33:41 Caller Yeah, of course you know Ape.

33:42 Caller Yes. Well, I don't know if you've heard of me.

33:44 Caller She says you have.

33:45 Caller I'm known.

33:46 Caller She called me Addie.

33:47 Caller Okay.

33:47 Caller Who I am?

33:49 Caller Yeah, sure.

33:49 Adam He knows a guy named A-hole, but he doesn't know Addie.

33:54 Caller I got a question.

33:55 Caller How did you get hooked up with Circa Footwear?

33:59 Caller A lot of work, a lot of work, man. Just involving with my friends and stuff and brought it together.

34:04 Caller Do you own it?

34:07 Caller I can't reveal that information on the air, buddy. Do you have any sexual type questions that you're wondering about?

34:14 Caller No, not really.

34:15 Caller No?

34:16 Caller I just want to speak to you.

34:17 Adam Do you have a question about the new video it says up on the screen?

34:20 Caller Yeah, yeah. I was told the premiere was supposed to be on her birthday last Saturday.

34:25 Caller What happened to that? For the shorties?

34:28 Caller Yeah.

34:28 Caller It's a little delayed, man. We're working on it. It's coming, bro.

34:31 Caller You guys don't have a title yet, right?

34:34 Caller Not yet. It'll happen soon though, man. All right, cool. Be careful with those girls out there, man.

34:38 Caller All right, I will.

34:39 Caller Why are your shoes so expensive?

34:41 Caller I spent 100 bucks on your shoes.

34:44 Caller Hey, hey, it's the best quality, brother. It's the best quality.

34:47 Adam He doesn't exploit third world labor. That's right. He has fat, white, middle-aged men in three-piece suits putting those shoes together. In Korea. In Korea. Is this your first video?

35:01 Caller No, we do stuff all the time. You know, just different types of... But our last video was pretty popular, so a lot of kids are waiting for the next one that we're doing.

35:08 Adam Right. And that's you sliding down stuff and getting hit in the nuts?

35:12 Caller No, sir.

35:13 Adam No, sir.

35:14 Caller Yeah, I'm taking a cup of advice. Taking a cup of advice.

35:16 Adam All right. Where are we here? Boy, what name is that? Aisleen? Hey, what's up, guys? Hey, you're 20.

35:23 Caller Yeah.

35:24 Adam What's going on?

35:25 Caller Um, I have like some white stuff coming out of my boob. My right boob.

35:31 Drew That would probably be milk.

35:33 Caller Well, it's considerably larger, and I thought it was milk, and I went and I got a pregnancy test, and it came out negative, so I don't know what's going on.

35:41 Drew Do you want any medication? No. Have you ever been pregnant before?

35:44 Caller Uh, yeah.

35:46 Drew Okay, so you know what that is, what that looks like when that happens, right?

35:49 Caller Well, sometimes it comes out kind of transparent.

35:51 Drew Which is what milk often is, right?

35:54 Caller Okay.

35:55 Adam It is?

35:56 Caller Usually pretty-

35:56 Adam Well, skim milk is.

35:58 Drew Um, human milk.

35:58 Adam It's actually blue.

35:59 Drew Human milk is pretty light looking. Well, here's the milk.

36:03 Adam Skim milk is like you took whole milk, dumped it out of the glass, and then rinsed it with some tap water.

36:08 Caller That's what skim milk is.

36:09 Drew Here are the most common reasons for that problem. Number one is pregnancy. Number two is medication. Number three would be thyroid problems. Number four would be pituitary tumors. Number five would probably be other chemicals like heroin. That kind of thing can sometimes do this sort of thing. Okay. Finally, let me think. What else might be on that list?

36:33 Adam Marijuana.

36:34 Drew Marijuana will do that. Marijuana could possibly do that.

36:36 Adam What happened with your first pregnancy?

36:39 Caller I had an abortion.

36:40 Adam Okay. So would you produce milk though if you had an abortion early on?

36:44 Caller Yeah.

36:45 Drew Oh yeah. You might.

36:46 Adam You would?

36:46 Drew You might.

36:46 Adam What about me as a guy? What if my girlfriend had an abortion?

36:49 Drew You're going back and talking about how you like your nipple stimulated and all that stuff.

36:52 Adam I do like a little nipple play.

36:54 Drew Don't bring it up. It gets me a little nauseated.

36:56 Adam Nipple play is what I call it. A nipple stimulation.

36:59 Drew It might generate a little something.

37:00 Caller Hey, you guys.

37:00 Adam This is a man. There's nothing wrong with a little nipple play.

37:03 Caller How about that?

37:04 Caller I like that.

37:05 Caller Perfect.

37:06 Adam Why does that make you so sick, Drew? Little nipple play?

37:09 Caller Cool.

37:12 Guest Maybe you've seen your nipples. Are they hairy or something?

37:14 Adam They got a little hair around them. It just looks like the sun, like Mr. Sun with a big nose right in the middle of it. Anyway, I like to think about my wrecked nipples.

37:26 Drew And the big nose. Ashley, you got to see a doctor. It's important.

37:29 Caller All right.

37:30 Adam Anderson, you got the man show on in there?

37:34 Caller Well, put it on.

37:36 Adam I don't want to come in there during a commercial like I do every time. It's a commercial.

37:39 Caller All right.

37:40 Adam I'm coming.

37:40 Caller Take me to call.

37:41 Adam I'm going to look at it.

37:42 Caller Every, every, I need to plug Loveline a little more than the man show, man. Come on.

37:46 Drew Thank you. Kick his ass a little bit.

37:49 Adam Yeah, sure.

37:50 Caller We'll take care of that.

37:51 Adam Well, get another goddamn call then. Michael?

37:55 Caller Yeah.

37:56 Adam You're 14. What's up?

37:58 Caller First of all, I just want to say, Adam Corolla, you're the greatest man in the world.

38:01 Adam That's right. Thanks.

38:02 Drew Don't you think that we've got to renew his commitment to Loveline a little bit, though, that he's really just, just, uh, He's hyping the man show up too much. He's just slacking, slacking on this job, prioritizing it, relinquishing and squandering this opportunity.

38:14 Adam I did something that rhymed with slacking right before I left the house, Drew. I just want you to know that.

38:19 Drew Is that unusual?

38:20 Adam No. It's just part of a ritual, part of my pre-show ritual.

38:24 Drew I want to be sure.

38:25 Caller All right.

38:25 Adam So, Michael, what's up with you?

38:27 Caller Okay. I just want to say, Chad Muska, what keeps you going for a skateboarding deal and whatnot?

38:34 Caller Just to progress, man, and learn new tricks and spread the word of skateboarding, get it out there to all these people and make them appreciate the sport. You know what I mean? It's just all about getting it out there and letting people appreciate it and keep progressing and trying to learn as much new tricks as I can. That's basically what it's all about.

38:52 Adam Where are you calling from, Michael? Oh, hey, who cares? We gotta go, Michael. Where are you calling from? Portland. Portland? You gonna drive out to Anaheim this weekend? Okay. All right.

39:03 Caller Later, hoes.

39:04 Adam God bless you. We have Bucky, Chad, and Andy all here, all professional skateboarders representing the Anaheim Invert 99, which is going on this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday in Anaheim at the Convention Center. We're gonna take a quick break. I'm gonna watch the Man Show, then we're coming back.

39:23 Caller Be right back in a minute.

39:34 Caller This is Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio 100.7 The Bust.

39:48 Adam And there, hey, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla, that is Dr. Drew. Bucky, Chad and Andy are all here tonight.

39:55 Drew That's right. Yeah, you are.

39:56 Adam All professional skateboarders, all gonna be at the Anaheim Convention Center this Friday, Saturday and Sunday, obviously in Anaheim for Invert 99. There's also, there's skateboarding, there's BMX. What else is going on over there?

40:09 Caller Music, lots of bands playing and stuff like that. Jurassic Five coming down.

40:14 Adam I'm guessing you probably could score some weed in the parking lot too, right?

40:17 Caller Yeah, sure, sure.

40:18 Drew Is our booth there for that? Probably.

40:20 Caller Muska's the man, look for me.

40:23 Adam And is there any kind of snowboarding or anything like that? Or are they doing some kind of?

40:28 Caller Industry, guys. Just like booths from snowboard companies and stuff will be there.

40:32 Guest Yeah, it's open to the public.

40:34 Caller Yep, video games for sure probably.

40:36 Caller So Tony Hawk Pro Skater, you got to buy that one? Yeah.

40:39 Adam Oh yeah, we just had him on the TV last week. Where the hell are we here? Dr. Drew, Jessica?

40:45 Caller Yeah, hey, what's up?

40:47 Adam Hey, you're 15. What's going on?

40:48 Caller Not much. Oh, I wanted to say, Dr. Drew, you're really great. I think you're cool. I called because I have like these control issues with guys. Like every guy I meet, and I'll like meet guys that are usually like really quiet types, and I'm really extroverted and I'll kind of overpower them, you know? Whether it's like my teachers or like boyfriends and stuff. And recently, it's gotten like really bad. And the last guy that I dated, like one time when we started like messing around, I totally got kind of dominatrix. It was really weird.

41:24 Drew Like, what did you do?

41:25 Caller Well, like I wouldn't let him touch me and I wouldn't, and I would like, only I could like touch him. And he had to like, you know, I was like yelling at him and making him lie down and stuff.

41:35 Adam He was just, this guy like 14, 15 years old, and you freak him out. 20?

41:39 Caller Yeah. I always kid him.

41:41 Adam Listen, if there weren't so many people in the studio, we'd start the gambling right now.

41:45 Drew Right now.

41:46 Adam What is up with you? What happened to you? Who did what to you?

41:49 Caller I've never been raped or molested.

41:51 Drew But you've been physically abused?

41:54 Caller A little bit.

41:55 Caller Yeah.

41:55 Adam Sprinkling of physical abuse?

41:57 Caller What?

41:57 Drew That's what this is.

41:58 Adam Where's your dad?

42:00 Caller My dad moved away when I was a really little kid.

42:02 Adam All right.

42:04 Caller But like when I was in 8th grade, he came back because I was doing kind of badly in school.

42:09 Adam Right.

42:09 Caller And my mom was kind of fed up, so she asked him to come back and help me out in school. And then he started like, you know, over a period of two weeks, he just got, you know, kind of out of control. And he's from Brazil. And I don't know, he got really like violent with me, but I just called the cops on him after he hit me a couple of times.

42:25 Drew That's good.

42:26 Caller He never hit me when I was like a baby.

42:27 Drew But we, I suspect somebody else did.

42:29 Adam Why did he move out when you were?

42:32 Caller I don't know, he was a pothead.

42:33 Drew Okay, so he's an addict. And then what about, and his step-dads or anything like that? Do anything for you?

42:37 Caller Well, I have a step-dad now who's like a really violent guy, but he doesn't hit me, he hits his daughter.

42:42 Drew Okay, but you're around all this violence. And kids, when they're around violence.

42:45 Adam Give your mom a kiss for me next time you see her, would you?

42:48 Drew And encourage her to continue the wise choices in her life.

42:51 Adam I think Tex Watkins, one of the original Manson guys.

42:55 Drew He's available.

42:55 Adam He may be paroled soon, so tell your mom to keep her heads up for him.

43:00 Caller You can bring him over for dinner.

43:01 Caller Maybe he'll beat the crap out of everyone.

43:03 Drew When children expose this kind of violence, particularly when it's directed towards them, it becomes etched into their biology. And when puberty hits, that all gets turned into sort of a sexual energy in an attempt to resolve a lot of those old feelings.

43:17 Adam Yeah, and they're sleeping with 20-year-old guys.

43:19 Caller I'm not sleeping with them, I'm a virgin. I look a lot older.

43:23 Adam But you're wearing the gimp ball in your mouth, and you're smacking them with a can of nine tails.

43:28 Caller I mean, she's saying it's not just sexual, it's like just in everything she's being controlled.

43:31 Caller Well, now it's becoming sexual.

43:33 Adam And now it's becoming sexual.

43:34 Caller Yeah. She's another technicality. You know, and also like if a guy comes up to me, and like is asking for my number, then I'll totally reject him immediately. But if it's like, if I see a guy who's really shy and is kind of intimidated by me, I'll kind of go after that, you know?

43:49 Adam What were you doing with the 20-year-old by the way, if it wasn't serious?

43:52 Caller Oh, I don't know. He thought I was like really gorgeous, and 20-year-olds have more money, and they buy me stuff, and I manipulate it in a weird way. Yes, you do.

43:58 Adam Yes, you do. Well, hey, Jessica?

44:01 Caller Yes?

44:01 Adam You're refreshingly honest for a 15-year-old.

44:05 Caller Get all you can get.

44:07 Adam Almost prostitute virgin. You know what I mean?

44:12 Caller I also have a question.

44:13 Adam All right. But listen, Jessica, you're well on your way.

44:15 Drew To trouble.

44:16 Adam Well on your way.

44:18 Drew And you're managing some technicalities here.

44:20 Adam You're 15 years old. Could you please, I mean, you know what you're doing. Do you think you could cool down just a little bit?

44:26 Caller It's just I only relate to 20-year-old guys on a relationship-wise. And then I always like-

44:31 Adam You don't relate to anyone. You beat the crap out of them. What do you mean, relate?

44:35 Drew And the 20-year-olds you picked, I promise you.

44:37 Caller I think it was a pretty okay relationship.

44:38 Drew Listen, Jessica, 20-year-old, what, you told them you were older?

44:42 Caller Yeah. But normally 20-year-olds that I date don't think I'm older than I am. They know I'm 15. But they're losers.

44:48 Drew That's why. They are losers.

44:51 Caller No, but they're not.

44:52 Drew By definition.

44:53 Adam I guarantee they are.

44:54 Caller With them thinking that I'm 20 and then I break it to them that I'm younger.

44:58 Drew They're still losers. They're not losers for him.

45:00 Caller Well, he broke up with me, so he was the healthy one.

45:02 Adam All right.

45:02 Caller Even though he let me beat him up.

45:03 Adam He probably was just arrested or something.

45:05 Caller What was your question?

45:07 Caller I wanted to ask you about MDMA.

45:08 Drew MDMA, yeah.

45:09 Caller You're always saying how it's dangerous. Yeah. And I have a lot of friends who work for MAPS, you know.

45:15 Drew For what?

45:16 Caller MAPS, it's the, I forget what it's an acronym for, but it's like they do research on hallucinogens and stuff like that. And I really don't understand your argument that it's dangerous. Are you saying that the neurotoxicity part of it is dangerous?

45:29 Drew That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

45:31 Caller But how? I don't get it. Like it's the studies that they've done.

45:35 Adam Hold on. I got MAPS. Mothers Against Pot Smokers.

45:39 Drew Who's MAPS?

45:40 Caller No, it's good. It's like the studies that they've done have shown that in like chronic dosages of like rats and monkeys and stuff, when they give them the equivalent of like 20 pills to a human a day for like over a long period of time, then they get minor brain defects.

45:55 Drew No, they've shown some of the substantial problems. And I can tell you from dealing with humans that take this drug, there are some serious stuff that goes down.

46:01 Caller Okay. And also the thing about mixing Fluxamine with MDMA, how that supposedly eliminates most of the neurotoxins.

46:08 Adam It's like a prostitute virgin chemist.

46:11 Drew I don't know where you get it. Wherever these people are, they are not significantly attached to the clinical reality of what happens to humans when they use this drug.

46:20 Adam Hey Jessica, listen, you got much bigger fish to fry here. Stop worrying about...

46:26 Caller I know I have like alcohol. Oh my god.

46:28 Caller Hey baby.

46:28 Adam Hey Jessica.

46:30 Caller Listen, you're 15.

46:31 Adam You can call the show once a year and we'll talk to you. But we're going on way too long. I know you got a thousand and one issues. Just stop acting out. Please, please stop it. Please. Thanks you guys. All right. Thank you. Oh man, where were all these chicks acting out when I was in high school? Where were they? Where were they? Where are all these crazy, horny, dominating acting out, getting back at their dad chicks when I was in high school? Everyone was completely normal when I was in high school. They all had a healthy dose of pride and self-esteem. It's like oral sex. Are you kidding?

47:09 Drew See, part of getting back at the dad, though, has to be with guys that wouldn't be gratified by this behavior.

47:14 Adam Oh, yeah.

47:14 Drew You would have been too gratified.

47:16 Guest How can she be so aware of things but not be able to like do something?

47:20 Adam There's just a difference between knowing something and being able to act on it.

47:25 Drew What was that?

47:26 Adam Especially when you're 15. I mean, it's like being an alcoholic or being in a heroin or being whatever. You know it's bad. You know you have a problem. But you don't stop at 15. You stop at 30 if you make it that far.

47:37 Caller Yeah. What was she talking about? That ecstasy. Oh, ecstasy is what she was.

47:41 Caller Okay.

47:42 Adam Greg, that's the worst thing. You're 13? You're not circumcised? No. You think you may have an infection?

47:49 Caller Yeah.

47:50 Adam Does your penis smell?

47:51 Caller What?

47:52 Adam Does your penis smell?

47:54 Caller Yeah.

47:54 Caller All right.

47:54 Adam No oral sex for you tonight. You're going right to bed.

47:58 Drew What makes you think you have an infection?

48:00 Caller All right. Hold on.

48:01 Adam We got to take a break. Well, because it's got a little funk coming from down there. We will get with Greg and his 13-year-old member after the break.

48:15 Caller Loveline, we'll be right back.

48:43 Adam We got to take a quick 10-second timeout, and we'll be back with more Loveline in just 10 seconds.

48:51 Caller This is Loveline on Radio Station.

48:58 Caller Outrageous, 100.7, the buzz.

49:00 Caller I suffer from the partial loss of my once-vital libido.

49:04 Caller KQBZ.

49:05 Caller It is Loveline.

49:06 Adam I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Drew. The violent FEMS will be in here tomorrow night. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Bucky Lasek, Chad Muska and Andy Macdonald are all here tonight. They will also be in Anaheim this Friday, Saturday and Sunday for Invert 99. Probably, say, one of the biggest shows of this kind in the country.

49:29 Guest I think it's pretty much the first of this kind.

49:31 Caller Yeah, it's pretty brand new. It's a pretty brand new issue. But it's kind of bouncing off some other things that have happened in the past, you know.

49:38 Adam But it's, I mean, everything will be there. If you want shoes, if you want snowboards, if you want a helmet, if you want a cup, you come to my booth. So I'm going to be selling those cups.

49:48 Guest This thing is usually open to the industry.

49:51 Adam Right.

49:51 Guest But now, this is like the new thing where it's going to be open to the public.

49:55 Adam Right.

49:56 Guest So.

49:56 Adam Yeah, I never understood a lot of those expo shows and stuff where you had to be a dealer or something to get into it. It's like, hey, you got a product, you want to sell it? Let people come buy it. Or at least look at it. And anyway, they're going to have a half pipe there. And I guess the BMX guy is going to be on the same or a different half pipe? There's going to be competitions. There doesn't need to be any difference between those two, does there? Is there?

50:22 Caller There is a lot. But in an event like this, you got to make do with what you're dealing with. And you have to please both people.

50:27 Adam What's the difference between a BMX half pipe and a skate half pipe?

50:31 Caller A BMX is like a little tighter transition, the curve of the ramp, and a little less vert at the top of the ramp. Whereas skaters like a bigger transition and more vert at the top. Skaters usually like a bigger ramp altogether.

50:44 Adam Right. I wonder why the BMXers, they don't...

50:48 Caller They got handlebars, so they can pull out off the top of the ramp.

50:52 Adam But why wouldn't they like a little bigger ramp? I mean, I think they like that.

50:57 Caller It's not the bigger size, it's just the way that the curvature of the actual ramp.

51:02 Adam Oh, I see.

51:03 Caller Like the skateboarder would like, you know, and more steep and a bike would probably want a little more mellow because they might have to have more landing space, you know?

51:11 Adam Uh-huh. You know, my only take on the bike stuff is, I understand they have the pegs on the bikes for when they do certain tricks and like freestyle stuff. But if you're just jumping, take the pegs off. It's one more thing to go up the ass. That's my take.

51:30 Caller I actually have a BMX friend that was almost sodomized on his back.

51:34 Adam No, no kidding. I was in, I think we talked about this before, remember I did that show with John Ritter in Orlando? I think it was called Ordinary Extraordinary? Turned out to be an ordinary show?

51:48 Drew Abortion, extortion?

51:49 Adam That's what they should have called it. You're right. They should have listened to me. Anyway, who the hell, Jay Muron? Who was that? Yeah. He was going to do a double flip. Double back. Double back on a bike indoors. He had a takeoff ramp because this was all the big sound stage in Orlando. Like Evel Knievel, he dropped down about three stories on a takeoff ramp. He hit it on an approach ramp. Then he hit his takeoff ramp, which almost went vertical. Then he went up. He must have got 25 feet air. I mean, he almost hit the rafters. No, he didn't get knocked out. He did a double flip and he missed it a bunch of times, but he finally nailed it. And it was pretty damn impressive, especially if you're just standing on the floor looking at him do it.

52:37 Guest He did get messed up, but since he signed the contract and everything that said he was going to do it, he had to go and do it.

52:43 Adam Oh, well, he didn't. I mean, I saw him. I mean, I don't know what he did in practice or whatever, but he messed up a few times, you know, while they were taping.

52:51 Guest He got wrecked.

52:51 Adam But he nailed it at the end.

52:54 Guest Right. He did eventually do it.

52:56 Adam Right. Yeah. Well, I was there. Yeah. Yeah. He landed it and everyone went nuts. But the point is, is a couple of times when he wiped out, he was like rolling over the front pegs that were on his bike. And I was thinking, that's the cup market right there. I was thinking, hey, Stoner, you're not doing anything where you need those pegs.

53:14 Guest Those damn Canadians.

53:15 Adam You're doing two flips in a soundstage. Just unscrew those big pegs that you got hanging. They're like weapons hanging off the front of the bike. And of course, when you crash, it's just one more thing to break a rib. Or like I said, to go up the Tokai.

53:32 Caller Right.

53:33 Adam I didn't say anything. But I was like, hey, Jay, I haven't been in BMX as long as you. But why don't you lose the pigs all over the bike? You're doing flips. They'll lighten it up a few ounces. What the hell, Greg?

53:43 Caller Yeah.

53:44 Adam You're 13. All right. So you have the infection in the penis, right?

53:49 Drew What makes you think so?

53:51 Caller Well, because it's like white and like. Out of where?

53:56 Adam Wait a minute. Hey, idiot, you can't say the S word. You get that?

54:00 Drew Yeah, I heard that.

54:01 Adam Thanks. All right. I'm going to let him stew in his own pussy juice for just a few minutes, because I got to punish our young listeners for using the S word and the F word on the radio, even though I use the S word.

54:12 Caller We heard you once already this afternoon.

54:16 Adam Vanessa?

54:16 Guest Notice Chad's pointing it all out.

54:18 Adam You're 25. What's up?

54:22 Caller I've been seeing this guy for like a year and a half already. Our sex is great.

54:26 Caller It's, it's very, it's, it's awesome.

54:29 Caller I mean, I was married before and it's nothing compared to this guy.

54:32 Adam Well, of course.

54:36 Drew He'll turn into a married guy soon.

54:37 Adam Don't worry. He'll slow down.

54:39 Caller No, with my first, with my husband, he was my first. And I was like, you know, I couldn't find no sexual, you know, I was like, oh, this is sex, you know?

54:48 Adam Yeah.

54:49 Caller Well, with this guy, he, you know, he, he's my boss. And he's only two years older.

54:54 Caller He'll be good.

54:55 Caller He's great.

54:55 Adam I mean, but how long have you two been going out a year and a half? They say.

54:59 Caller All right.

55:00 Caller So our only problem is that he doesn't, we have, we don't really have foreplay. I do a lot of oral sex on him.

55:09 Adam Yeah.

55:09 Caller But he doesn't kiss me.

55:10 Caller Well, he's, he's the boss. Yeah.

55:13 Adam Come on. That's that, that part of the privilege is to go along with being a boss. You get all the oral sex.

55:19 Drew Both you guys came up with that simultaneously. Think about that.

55:22 Caller He's not my boss anymore.

55:23 Adam I mean, well, he is in the bedroom, honey.

55:28 Caller I mean, if there's times where I say, okay, forget it, I'm not going to go out with him, but he's always coming around.

55:34 Adam Hold on a second. This one from the greatest love making and beautiful relationship in the world to all I do is perform oral sex. He doesn't want to kiss me. He stopped coming around. So I threatened to see him. It's like, wow, how'd this thing get in the gutter so quick? I think you guys were getting along. You were thick as thieves like 30 seconds ago. And now you hate each other. And only our listeners, Vanessa. So, how good is he in bed?

56:01 Caller He's really good. I mean, he's big.

56:04 Drew But you hate him. But you hate that he doesn't kiss you.

56:07 Caller Yeah, I mean, I'll have an orgasm if he gives me foreplay, if he kisses me. It's great.

56:12 Drew But he never does that.

56:13 Caller And he hardly does.

56:14 Caller No, it's maybe twice in a month.

56:17 Drew So what's so good about that? It's awful.

56:21 Caller I just like the way he makes me feel when we have...

56:23 Guest You know, wait around? Well, you mean wait for that?

56:26 Adam You know, potentially he's good in bed.

56:31 Drew But in reality, he's not.

56:32 Adam Yeah.

56:33 Caller And he's a bad kisser.

56:34 Caller But it's just that he just gives me back...

56:37 Caller Is it a serious relationship?

56:38 Adam Or does he break a lot of wind, get you in a headlock and do that kind of stuff too, Vanessa?

56:44 Caller I wish.

56:46 Adam Hey, Vanessa, Vanessa, Vanessa, what is up with you that you start off the call with, this is the greatest love making ever, and now he doesn't kiss you, he just wants oral sex, he's got a bad attitude.

57:00 Caller And he doesn't give me oral sex.

57:03 Adam We understand he's not doing his job, but we didn't say that he was great in bed. You said he was great in bed.

57:11 Caller Yeah.

57:13 Adam Do you understand what we're saying, Vanessa? How is he great in bed and an awful guy in bed?

57:20 Guest One of 10? Like once out of 10 he's good?

57:23 Drew He, the fact that he potentially could make you feel good is not a good.

57:27 Adam We have the world's dumbest callers. I really, I would challenge any show to the stupidity of our callers. I really would in their ability. Vanessa, please. Vanessa, what if I called you and said I have a girlfriend, the love making is beautiful, I love her, and she's fat, she won't go down on me.

57:47 Drew And she never touches me.

57:47 Adam And she never touches me.

57:48 Drew And it makes me feel like an orgasm except twice a month.

57:51 Adam Wouldn't you be a little confused?

57:53 Caller Yeah.

57:53 Adam Okay. So what is up with you and why is this acceptable for you? What happened?

57:59 Caller There's guys who ask me out and I just don't do it because I'm, I'm out there, you know, diseases and stuff like that.

58:07 Caller Maybe our last guy was really bad.

58:09 Adam I'm getting all he was. Where was dad? Where's daddy?

58:12 Drew Your dad.

58:13 Caller My dad?

58:14 Caller Yeah.

58:15 Caller My mom and my dad got divorced when I was 15.

58:18 Adam Was he a bad guy before that?

58:21 Caller No, he wasn't a bad dad. He was very, he was very overprotective. My dad's a police officer.

58:27 Drew Did he drink a little bit?

58:27 Caller He was, so I mean I like the attention. It's just that I mean I get it from other guys that want to go out with me. They give me stuff. They buy me stuff. They buy me, give me money. They give me roses.

58:37 Drew Did he drink a little bit, your dad? Did he drink a little bit, your dad?

58:41 Caller My dad never drank, no.

58:43 Caller Just heroin?

58:44 Adam All right, listen, Vanessa.

58:47 Caller Every excuse is drugs.

58:47 Adam It doesn't sound like a great relationship, you and you and the boss man, all right? Maybe you ought to think about moving on.

58:57 Drew There are not-

58:57 Adam Or at least get your antenna put on straight.

59:00 Drew Not everybody out there has a disease. Yes, you need to be careful, but the country is not dying of sexually transmitted diseases.

59:10 Adam No. Parts of the valley are where I'm from. Oh, yeah. The country at large is fine. I don't understand how you get to be 25 years old and it's like somebody dropped you on the planet, spun you around and pushed you out of a van. You know what I mean? It's like...

59:25 Drew There are lots of that.

59:26 Adam What is that? I mean, what is that where you've been on the planet for 25 years and it's like you don't really even know where you are. I mean, you don't know how... I mean, you got a guy...

59:38 Caller There's a lot of people out there like that.

59:40 Adam I know, but how does that work? I don't understand that. It doesn't have to do with formal education. It really doesn't.

59:47 Drew Well, it's primitive meets lack of education. Primitive emotionally.

59:51 Adam I didn't have any education, none of my friends I grew up with had any education, but they sort of knew where they were. I mean, they knew when they were in a relationship, if it was a good one or a bad one, they knew how to ask for what they wanted.

1:00:03 Drew That's not primitive.

1:00:04 Adam It isn't? I don't know, but they threw their own feces at each other.

1:00:08 Drew Evolved in certain ways.

1:00:09 Adam That's primitive, isn't it?

1:00:10 Drew Yeah, I didn't say that.

1:00:11 Adam You say like...

1:00:12 Caller Find a new guy.

1:00:13 Drew I didn't say their knuckles had come off the ground.

1:00:15 Adam You're just saying, peeing on your friend's leg while he was at the stall next to you, wouldn't you call that primitive?

1:00:20 Drew Yes.

1:00:21 Adam All right. Lizzie?

1:00:22 Caller Yeah, hi.

1:00:23 Adam You're 13.

1:00:24 Caller Yeah.

1:00:25 Caller First of all, I'd like to say, Adam and Drew, long time listener, second time caller.

1:00:28 Adam Great.

1:00:29 Caller And quick question for the Muska.

1:00:32 Caller I just want to know how you feel. I know that you skate for the CCS team.

1:00:35 Caller Yes.

1:00:35 Caller I just want to know how you feel about them, like ripping off your backpack and selling it for a third cheaper.

1:00:42 Caller I hate it. I do not like it at all. And I'm very mad at those guys.

1:00:45 Caller All right. Sorry, Dave, but I bought the backpack.

1:00:48 Caller Oh, the CCS one?

1:00:49 Caller Yeah.

1:00:50 Caller Oh, man.

1:00:51 Caller That's cold. That's cold. That's cold.

1:00:55 Caller But you know, I mean, you still skate for the team. Okay.

1:00:58 Caller So I get a question for all you pros.

1:01:00 Caller I've been skating for about two or three years, and I was getting pretty good. And then about a year ago, I was ollieing a gap and I fell about three feet, and I landed twisted on my ankle. And it just like shot up through my whole leg, and I couldn't walk for about a month, and I was out for about three more months.

1:01:21 Adam What were you doing to a gap?

1:01:22 Caller I was, I was ollieing a gap.

1:01:24 Adam Ollieing a gap?

1:01:25 Caller It's basically jumping, jumping down off a higher level thing, you know. Some stairs or something. Yeah. Skateboard lingo.

1:01:32 Adam Yeah. I think I rented ollieing a gap.

1:01:35 Caller What's your, what's your question now?

1:01:36 Caller Um, since I got hurt, I just like, for some reason, I'll like go up to ollie down some steps or something. And my mind will be like, yeah, I'm going to do it. I'm going to ollie these steps and my body will just be like crap and I'll just bail. And I mean, I don't know how to, you know, get up the guts to start.

1:01:57 Caller You just got to go back to the gap that you hurt yourself on and do it. Make yourself do it.

1:02:03 Caller Right. Hurt yourself again.

1:02:04 Adam Hurt the other leg.

1:02:05 Caller It's called getting back on the horse.

1:02:07 Caller You got to watch a bunch of video of Alyssa Steamer.

1:02:10 Caller There you go.

1:02:11 Adam Put a cup on too.

1:02:13 Caller Yeah, put a cup on. You got to be careful.

1:02:14 Drew Adam, what should women wear?

1:02:16 Adam They should wear, let's see.

1:02:18 Caller A Gucci cup.

1:02:20 Adam Yeah, one of those Madonna bras. One of those sort of iron bras that they wear on those blacklight posters where the chick is riding the saber toothed tiger out in the snow.

1:02:33 Caller You know what I'm talking about?

1:02:34 Drew Yes.

1:02:34 Adam Viking chicks. Right.

1:02:37 Drew Any other protection they need?

1:02:38 Adam Who does those? Boris? Is that Boris? What is the name of that artist? Any other protection for women? Skateboarding? You got to wear a helmet as a woman. And I'll tell you why. Because if you're straddling an ollie ball, you think? And you land on the guard railing, and you land straddle it, you're going to plant. You're going to stick immediately, and your head will whip down toward the post in front. You see what I mean? Man will slide on his scrotum. Woman lands straddle. She's stuck. You know what I'm saying?

1:03:13 Guest Depends on how stoked she is on the rail, though. She might slide down it.

1:03:17 Adam Well, then it's important to talc the crotch before you do the rail. Because if you hit, then you'll...

1:03:23 Drew How will a resin?

1:03:24 Adam I'd wax it. I'd wax the crotch.

1:03:26 Caller I would definitely say that knee pads were important for women as well.

1:03:30 Adam That's right. In all aspects of life, not just when you're skateboarding.

1:03:34 Caller Oh, enough.

1:03:38 Adam Greg? Alright, you're 13. Yeah. 15 minutes ago, you had a problem with your penis.

1:03:44 Drew How do you know it's infected?

1:03:46 Caller Well, because pus comes out. Of where? When you take a piss.

1:03:51 Drew And are you sexually active?

1:03:53 Caller No.

1:03:54 Adam Okay. And is there a, and it's got a funky smell, right?

1:03:58 Caller Yeah.

1:03:58 Adam So you got the foreskin. Do you keep it clean down there?

1:04:02 Caller Yeah.

1:04:02 Adam You do? What do you think this infection could be there, Drew?

1:04:06 Drew I don't understand how you get a sexually transmitted disease without being sexually active.

1:04:09 Adam Is there any kind of infection that you can get that would mirror a sexually transmitted disease without being one?

1:04:16 Drew I mean, yes.

1:04:17 Adam It's rare?

1:04:18 Caller Like, longi detergent or something like that?

1:04:20 Drew I don't know how you'd get it. I don't know what you'd contract.

1:04:22 Guest Dirty underwear.

1:04:23 Adam Well, couldn't you get...

1:04:24 Drew You have to have a pretty serious urethritis to get PUSS. I wonder if you'd have a...

1:04:27 Adam Could you get like a prostate problem with that?

1:04:29 Guest Did he bite the wrong way?

1:04:30 Drew I wonder if he's having like a pre-cum problem and is thinking that's PUSS.

1:04:33 Caller Oh.

1:04:34 Adam Hey, Greg? Maybe you're becoming a man. You know what I'm saying?

1:04:39 Drew You've sprung a leak.

1:04:41 Caller Well, I've already almost completely matured. I mean, I've been over, you know, I checked over and it's like, they said that I'm like overly advanced for how old I am.

1:04:49 Adam You are?

1:04:50 Caller Yeah.

1:04:51 Adam You got like hair on you and stuff?

1:04:53 Caller Oh yeah. Like completely.

1:04:54 Adam That's scary. You see a 13-year-old guy with a bunch of hair on him. How's the penis doing?

1:05:00 Caller Well, good.

1:05:01 Adam All right. Good. Put it on the phone. Let me talk to him. See if we can get to the bottom of this infection. All right, Drew, so what should he do then?

1:05:09 Drew I mean, the doctor, he needs to see the doctor to see if there really is, I doubt that it's an infection, though. I really do. If you're not sexually active, it's hard to understand how that could develop.

1:05:16 Adam Well, see a doctor anyway. And listen, all you, all you 13-year-old boys.

1:05:22 Caller Maybe he's all in a gap.

1:05:22 Drew I mean, at the tip of his penis.

1:05:25 Caller Spider couldn't do something like that?

1:05:26 Caller I don't know.

1:05:30 Caller I'm not the doctor here.

1:05:32 Adam Crawls up the urethra, lays eggs in the balls, right Drew?

1:05:35 Caller You've heard of this happening.

1:05:36 Drew Spraying out.

1:05:37 Adam Spraying forth, yeah.

1:05:39 Drew Little webs flying everywhere.

1:05:40 Adam I, oh, could you imagine? You know, they show the web coming from sort of his wrist area. But you gotta imagine when he's with a gal. I mean, if you squirt stuff from under your wrist, imagine what comes out of your penis is basically what I'm saying. I suggest all our 13-year-old males take a picture of themselves in the nude and hang on to it. Wouldn't it be fun to have a picture of yourself, like with no hair on your nuts or anything? Keep it to yourself, man.

1:06:08 Guest No, I'm just kidding.

1:06:10 Adam I'm not saying to send it in or anything. It'd be funny to see a picture of you with like no hair and no love handles and no, no, no major scars.

1:06:19 Caller I got a picture like that, except I'm like three.

1:06:22 Adam Oh, yeah, but then everyone's got that one. Yeah. Everyone's got the three, maybe the five, and then they stop.

1:06:29 Drew And then, you know, nobody knows what happens between that and 15.

1:06:32 Adam Well, listen, I'm 35. Then the video, I don't know, I can't remember what I look like with no hair and no junk on me. You know what I'm saying, Drew?

1:06:40 Drew Yeah.

1:06:40 Caller Right.

1:06:42 Adam You'd like to see that, right?

1:06:43 Drew Twelve would be interesting because you're sort of grown, but not.

1:06:45 Caller Twelve.

1:06:46 Adam All right, everyone, do what Drew says. All you young boys, say pictures of yourself naked at 12.

1:06:51 Caller Right, Drew?

1:06:53 Adam Thank you.

1:06:54 Caller There you go. Ryan?

1:06:56 Guest Yeah.

1:06:57 Adam Hey. You're 16.

1:06:58 Guest Yeah.

1:06:59 Caller Like four days ago, I called my girlfriend with my best friend in their bedroom and they were having sex and I was wondering how I should confront them.

1:07:09 Drew Why do you have to confront them? They saw you.

1:07:11 Caller No, they didn't see me though. The door was cracked.

1:07:14 Drew Where were they?

1:07:15 Caller In her apartment.

1:07:16 Caller And you let them finish?

1:07:18 Caller No, I left. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, I left.

1:07:20 Drew Why were you going over there?

1:07:21 Caller I always go over to her house after school.

1:07:23 Drew Well, didn't she know you were coming?

1:07:25 Caller No. I don't know.

1:07:26 Guest I mean, I was there.

1:07:27 Adam Share it up, Brian, you idiot. When you come over there every day after school and so she's having sex and with no thought that you're going to show up at the same time you show up every day.

1:07:38 Caller I mean, it doesn't always have to be the same time, you know what I mean?

1:07:41 Adam Yeah, it could be 10 minutes this way, 10 minutes that way.

1:07:43 Caller I mean, you never know, I mean.

1:07:45 Adam No, Ryan, this doesn't make sense.

1:07:48 Caller Well, I mean, that's what happens.

1:07:49 Adam Okay, so what do you want to know?

1:07:51 Caller I mean, how should I confront?

1:07:52 Caller Beat the crap out of the guy.

1:07:55 Caller Yeah, but I mean, he's like my best friend.

1:07:58 Drew If this really happened, this is not your best friend. It's not a friend.

1:08:02 Caller I guess you're right.

1:08:03 Caller Or the girl is not your girl.

1:08:05 Drew She is definitely not the girl.

1:08:06 Adam Did you break up with her yet?

1:08:08 Caller No, I haven't even talked to her about it.

1:08:10 Adam Why does she have her own apartment? How old is she?

1:08:12 Caller Oh, well, it's her mom's apartment, you know.

1:08:14 Adam Oh, I see.

1:08:14 Drew Well, she definitely wanted you to find out.

1:08:16 Adam Absolutely.

1:08:17 Guest Yeah.

1:08:18 Adam And how did you just walk in? Do you have a key to the place?

1:08:21 Caller Yeah, I have a key to her place.

1:08:23 Adam And you just walked into the apartment. You didn't make any noise.

1:08:27 Caller No, it's a hallway. It's a huge apartment. It's pretty big, you know.

1:08:31 Adam And you walked down the hall, and you went to her bedroom, and the door was open?

1:08:35 Caller Yeah, it was cracked. I mean, you could see through it.

1:08:38 Adam Right, and you saw through it?

1:08:40 Caller Yeah.

1:08:41 Adam What position were they in?

1:08:42 Caller He was on top of her.

1:08:43 Guest Alright, so you just saw his eye. Well, Adam, isn't this the time to like break it to him and try to get something on, like...

1:08:51 Adam Break it to who?

1:08:52 Guest Break it to the couple and try to get something on, like doubles or anything?

1:08:56 Adam Oh, like a threesome?

1:08:57 Guest Yeah.

1:08:58 Adam Yeah, if that were her and her lesbian friend getting it on, I could see, but you're gonna blow in your body and be in deeper. Right?

1:09:06 Guest Yeah.

1:09:07 Adam Okay. Break up with the girl and the guy is definitely not your best friend, and that's fine. I still don't totally buy it. I don't know how this stuff works where someone's getting it on with the guy's best friend during the time when the guy shows up every day.

1:09:24 Caller I don't care what you say. You don't walk into that situation, see it and turn around and walk out.

1:09:29 Caller I don't care.

1:09:30 Adam That's possible. We've had people freak out and go running out of the place and not usually at 16. You got to do something. I mean, otherwise it's going to finish off. But the point is, is either this didn't happen or it did. And she wanted him to know. And the guy kind of wanted him to know, too. And how it is you don't shut the door completely is another interesting thing here. Drew, do you not buy it?

1:09:57 Drew I don't buy it, but your points are well taken.

1:09:59 Adam Thank you. All right, we will take ourselves a little break. When we come back, we'll speak to Joe. Joe's 23, he's 5'10, and 350, I don't know. I'm guessing he's not a skater, but...

1:10:15 Drew That would be interesting.

1:10:15 Adam Imagine Joe doing that half-pipe. Yeah. Wow.

1:10:19 Caller He needs to start skating.

1:10:21 Adam We will speak to Joe. He's looking in to getting his stomach staple. Then we'll talk to him about that after this.

1:10:31 Caller We'll be right back.

1:10:56 Adam It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. No more finger boarding, please. All right, we got some more fresh beers in here. Buddy, Lassic, Chad Muska, and Andy Macdonald are all here representing the Invert 99 that's at the Anaheim Convention Center this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Oh, did I say Buddy? Oh. That'd be Bucky over there. I didn't say Bucky? All right. Well, I like Buddy. Buddy's nice. What's up, Buddy? All right. Thanks for... What the hell? How does Lisa know what I'm saying? She's talking on the phone. All right, where the hell were we here?

1:11:36 Drew She's paying attention.

1:11:37 Adam That's amazing. I'm not used to that.

1:11:40 Drew Oh, speaking of that.

1:11:42 Adam Anne had a baby. Yeah, speaking of that. That's right. Our wonderful producer Anne had her twins today.

1:11:49 Caller Congratulations.

1:11:50 Drew Last night.

1:11:51 Adam Wasn't this morning? No. Last night?

1:11:54 Drew I believe so.

1:11:56 Adam Last night at 10.30. I tried calling the hospital today, but I think I got like an answering machine or something. I think I got the wrong number.

1:12:05 Drew I talked to her. She's doing great.

1:12:07 Adam She is?

1:12:07 Drew Yeah.

1:12:08 Adam And when's she getting out of the hospital?

1:12:11 Drew Probably two days.

1:12:12 Adam Why two days?

1:12:14 Drew She had a pretty hard delivery.

1:12:15 Adam Really?

1:12:15 Drew Yeah.

1:12:17 Adam What makes it hard? And then why two days?

1:12:20 Drew One baby was stuck for a while and they almost had to do a cesarean section on her.

1:12:25 Adam Really? But they didn't?

1:12:26 Drew She got out just when they were really preparing the operating room.

1:12:30 Adam For the C-section?

1:12:30 Drew Yep.

1:12:31 Adam But what I'm saying is they came out, right?

1:12:35 Drew Takes a couple days for one to recover. Does.

1:12:38 Adam Just got to lay still for a while. No sex for those two days?

1:12:42 Drew No, for those two days. Well, Doug was trying when I called.

1:12:46 Caller My mom said I came out sideways.

1:12:48 Adam Really? My mom said I was squeezed out of a bar rag.

1:12:52 Guest How does the C-section?

1:12:54 Adam Your C?

1:12:54 Caller Yeah.

1:12:55 Adam Is that bad? It is linked to certain forms of retardation, but they don't have any. It's not in all cases. It's only about 60.

1:13:03 Caller I'm doing pretty good so far. You're doing fine. Just slight mental problems there.

1:13:07 Guest That explains it, that explains it.

1:13:09 Drew All products of C-section are well known to be excluded from the Kingdom of Heaven.

1:13:13 Adam That's right.

1:13:13 Caller Yeah.

1:13:14 Adam See, you have to come out the vagina in order to get on the list, right, Drew?

1:13:19 Caller Yeah.

1:13:20 Adam All right. Joe?

1:13:21 Caller Yes.

1:13:21 Drew All right.

1:13:22 Adam So you're 23.

1:13:23 Caller Yes.

1:13:24 Adam You're 5'10, you're 350 pounds, and you're looking into getting a stomach staple.

1:13:30 Drew Yeah.

1:13:30 Guest I was wondering if it was safe or if it really works.

1:13:34 Adam Well, is the stomach staple the same gastric bypass thing? Is that what it is now?

1:13:39 Drew Different procedures. We had, what's her name?

1:13:42 Adam We had Carney Wilson who had this procedure.

1:13:46 Drew She had a gastric bypass, which is a little different.

1:13:48 Adam Her manager had this.

1:13:50 Drew Manager had a gastrectomy and wrap. There are different procedures out there, and they work. They work to some extent. There will be weight loss. But it all still requires if you're really going to do it properly, also diet and exercise.

1:14:03 Caller Do you eat a lot of cheese?

1:14:05 Caller No, not really.

1:14:06 Adam Have you always been overweight, Joe?

1:14:09 Caller Yeah, from very young.

1:14:11 Adam Yeah. Yeah, I, you know, I've said it many times. We always sort of look at overweight people, make fun of them. But the reality is, is it's kind of a genetic hand that they got dealt. I mean, take a look. You know, you have Carney Wilson, right? She's overweight. She just had this procedure done. And then they show these old pictures of Wilson Phillips when they were kids, you know, because they're all like friends growing up and, you know, family and all that. And there's Wendy and there's China and there's Carney. And they're five years old and Carney's fat. You know what I mean? And I don't think Carney's eating any more than anyone, anyone else at five.

1:14:52 Caller Are you active?

1:14:53 Caller I'm very active. I work out, ride a bike. Now it's the winter, so I don't ride a bike anymore.

1:14:59 Adam Well, how? And how's your diet going there?

1:15:03 Caller Well, I eat what everybody else is eating. It's not like I'm overeating.

1:15:07 Adam Right.

1:15:08 Drew Yeah, but you can't. You have a certain genetic...

1:15:11 Caller And I have a job.

1:15:12 Caller I'm f***ing it. So I have to run a lot to the cars and deliver the cars.

1:15:17 Caller So I'm very active.

1:15:19 Caller It's just I try diets, try different things.

1:15:22 Caller And nothing is working.

1:15:23 Drew By the way, whatever you do at work, even if you're a football player, it doesn't really qualify as exercise.

1:15:28 Adam I know. Why is that?

1:15:30 Drew Exercise is something you do for 30 to 60 minutes.

1:15:34 Caller You have to bring your heart rate up.

1:15:36 Drew That's right. You have to sustain it there. And you have to do it more. You have to build on it every day. I mean, you are not exercising, Joe. Don't kid yourself.

1:15:45 Adam But still, if you're...

1:15:45 Caller Even if you break a sweat.

1:15:46 Adam If you're framing...

1:15:48 Caller It's better than sitting at a desk.

1:15:50 Adam But not much.

1:15:52 Drew Not much. That's right.

1:15:53 Caller That ain't fair.

1:15:54 Drew It's not fair. That's right. But it's the way it works.

1:15:56 Adam You're schleppin cinder blocks all day long out in the sun, you know, up some stairs.

1:16:01 Caller You're gonna lose some weight.

1:16:02 Adam A little, but not as much as you should.

1:16:05 Drew Mostly get tired. You're not gonna condition yourself.

1:16:08 Adam Oh, man. The man has an end for everyone.

1:16:09 Caller Do you know if the operation is safe?

1:16:11 Drew It is safe, yes. But it's a big...

1:16:13 Caller Because they have a 90% success rate.

1:16:17 Drew Yeah, but Joe, look.

1:16:19 Adam Hey, Karnes is on the Internet.

1:16:21 Drew Yeah, you can look at her thing. And it's a major operation. And as with every major operation, it can have problems. But it's a worthwhile thing to do for some people, but not without diet and exercise. All right, Joe. And you're not doing that right now.

1:16:37 Caller And if you need that route...

1:16:38 Adam Joe, and you can't eat what everyone else eats because of your metabolism. You understand?

1:16:44 Drew Meet with a dietitian, get an exercise program together, do that for six months, see what you can do that way first.

1:16:51 Caller All right.

1:16:51 Drew Then consider them. Where the hell are we?

1:16:55 Adam Chris, you're 27.

1:16:56 Caller Hi.

1:16:57 Caller Hey.

1:16:58 Caller First of all, I just want to say, I think your show is really great. It provides a service to a lot of folks who probably don't have access. Thanks.

1:17:05 Adam I'm here for the money and the checks.

1:17:07 Caller Hey, listen.

1:17:08 Drew And if you want more of the Chris, drdrew.com, we've got an amazing amount of information. We're hooked in with the National Institute of Health. There's just tons of stuff we're building out on that site.

1:17:17 Caller I'm really glad to hear that. That's wonderful. Okay.

1:17:21 Adam What's up with you there, Chris?

1:17:23 Caller I'm doing me help. I have a problem. I can't walk around in a t-shirt without a bra.

1:17:30 Drew How come?

1:17:31 Caller I can't wear a nice evening gown that's sleeveless. I actually get physically sick to my stomach from friction. I have to be naked or I have to wear a bra. I can't.

1:17:44 Drew What do you mean friction?

1:17:46 Caller I mean any type of sensation of a t-shirt or something rubbing against me really really bothers me.

1:17:53 Drew Huh, interesting.

1:17:54 Adam What is that? Somebody do something weird to you?

1:17:57 Caller I knew you were going to ask that. No, no, that's a very normal healthy relationship with everyone I've known.

1:18:03 Adam How big are your breasts?

1:18:05 Caller Huh?

1:18:05 Adam Are they big, your breasts?

1:18:07 Caller I'm a 30-60.

1:18:09 Adam That's pretty good. I'd prefer they'd be a D, but all right. It's, what is it, Wednesday?

1:18:16 Caller Yeah.

1:18:16 Adam Okay. So is it just some sort of friction on your nipples or something?

1:18:22 Caller Yeah, I just, I can't stand it.

1:18:24 Drew Has it always been that way?

1:18:26 Caller Yeah, as long as I can remember.

1:18:28 Adam All right. So you usually wear a bra though, right?

1:18:30 Caller Right.

1:18:31 Drew Well, that's it.

1:18:31 Adam Or when you're now wearing a bra, you're in the shower.

1:18:33 Drew How about if you're with a partner and they try touching that area?

1:18:37 Caller Well, I don't. There's like a threshold I have to get past the initial. If more play takes too long, I get antsy and just hurry up and let's go.

1:18:48 Adam Yeah, I'm that way too. I'm like, honey, I didn't pay 50 bucks for this. Let's keep it. Let's get it going now. Let's move along. A big guy out by the door scaring me. I'm scared there's someone's ripping off my car right now. Let's move.

1:19:02 Caller I just want to be like one of those chicks who can vacuum with a T-shirt. Go out in a tank.

1:19:08 Guest She needs to break them in.

1:19:10 Adam You either vacuum in a bra or vacuum naked. What about when you're in a bikini?

1:19:15 Caller Once I get in the water, it's okay.

1:19:18 Drew Can you wear band-aids or something? Some sort of cover that wouldn't...

1:19:23 Caller That would be unpleasant.

1:19:25 Drew I don't know.

1:19:26 Adam A lot of chicks do that.

1:19:28 Caller Under their bathing suit.

1:19:29 Drew Or under your shirt.

1:19:31 Caller It's just her nipples that are irritating her?

1:19:32 Drew Yeah.

1:19:33 Caller Yeah. I don't like contact.

1:19:35 Drew Why don't you wear a band-aid or something like that? A lot of people do that.

1:19:39 Adam Hey Chris.

1:19:40 Drew You got some kind of phobia about it.

1:19:41 Caller Yeah.

1:19:42 Adam That's weird.

1:19:42 Caller Yeah.

1:19:42 Adam Just a thought.

1:19:43 Caller I'm so normal.

1:19:45 Adam You don't even want to touch your own nipples.

1:19:47 Caller Could it be some nerve damage or something?

1:19:50 Adam I don't know. Now I'm starting to think she's a little weird.

1:19:53 Caller Oh jeez.

1:19:53 Caller Come on.

1:19:54 Adam Come on. Seriously.

1:19:55 Guest Rub some ambusol on them things or something.

1:19:57 Adam What do we need to know about you?

1:19:59 Caller I am completely normal.

1:20:01 Adam All right. Then why don't you just listen to something that makes sense?

1:20:05 Caller Try the band-aid thing.

1:20:06 Adam Go with the band-aid.

1:20:09 Caller Okay.

1:20:09 Caller If it doesn't work, keep the bra on.

1:20:12 Drew She's having a wave of nausea again. Just even with talking.

1:20:15 Adam You're so freaked out.

1:20:16 Caller I'm really bothered.

1:20:17 Adam Maybe some uncle did something to your nipples when you were two and don't remember.

1:20:24 Caller I doubt it, but of course anything is possible.

1:20:28 Adam There's something more here. I mean, it's psychological.

1:20:30 Caller That's weird. Yeah, I never heard of that.

1:20:33 Adam You know what I'm saying? Seriously, anything, Chris?

1:20:37 Caller Really? Nothing in my memory.

1:20:40 Adam Yeah, okay. All right. Well, then put the band-aids on. Quit arguing with us.

1:20:46 Caller Okay, thanks for your time.

1:20:47 Adam I'll tell you what. I'll put the band-aid on my penis tomorrow before I leave the house.

1:20:52 Caller The removal is the only ugly part of that.

1:20:55 Adam Yeah, it's going to be rough.

1:20:56 Drew The little dot band-aids will run.

1:20:58 Adam Yeah, like when you get the shaving nicks or the corns or something.

1:21:01 Drew Put that on your penis.

1:21:02 Adam Put that on my penis?

1:21:03 Drew Yeah.

1:21:04 Caller Ew.

1:21:06 Adam Drew, that's not going to cover up my entire penis. That little dot, that little nipple-sized one.

1:21:10 Caller We're talking about her nipples, not the penis.

1:21:12 Drew I used to.

1:21:13 Adam My penis wear that thing like a yarmulke. Are you kidding me? Penis would laugh at that.

1:21:19 Caller Little hat.

1:21:19 Adam That's right. Alan?

1:21:21 Caller Yeah.

1:21:22 Adam You're 25.

1:21:23 Caller Yes, sir.

1:21:24 Adam What is that?

1:21:25 Caller I had sex a couple nights ago, about three nights ago. All right.

1:21:29 Adam Protected.

1:21:30 Caller Yeah.

1:21:33 Caller Kind of...

1:21:33 Adam Still a little out of breath. It's been good.

1:21:36 Caller What's that?

1:21:37 Caller All right. Go ahead there, Alan.

1:21:39 Caller No, I wore a condom and everything, but the next day and the day after, I'm kind of chafed on my scrotum. It's like just red and kind of itching me.

1:21:50 Caller What could that be?

1:21:51 Drew Is this a woman you're with?

1:21:53 Caller Yes.

1:21:54 Drew Is somebody you knew?

1:21:55 Caller No.

1:21:56 Drew You didn't know her?

1:21:56 Caller Hooker?

1:21:58 Caller What's that?

1:21:58 Adam Prostitute?

1:21:59 Caller Well, she tells me she's an actress and then halfway.

1:22:05 Caller She's an adult actress.

1:22:08 Adam Well, halfway into it, what did she say?

1:22:10 Caller At the end of the night, the whole thing, she says she's an actress and she's been in films, blah, blah, blah, and I figured, oh, whatever, just like everyone else in this city. Then at the end of the night, she's like, well, these are some of the films I've done, and she pops in the tape, I'm like, whoa.

1:22:24 Caller Wow.

1:22:25 Adam That sounds like a decent outing for you, Alan. She didn't want any money or anything?

1:22:31 Caller No.

1:22:32 Caller You could catch stuff with still having a condom on, right?

1:22:35 Drew Yep. That's right.

1:22:36 Caller Like skin on skin?

1:22:37 Guest Oh, yeah.

1:22:38 Drew Like sort of-

1:22:39 Adam Like herpy on nut.

1:22:40 Drew Yeah, like secretion on nut.

1:22:43 Guest Yeah.

1:22:43 Drew Oh, boy.

1:22:44 Caller There's no bumps, there's no-

1:22:46 Drew Well, herpies can sometimes just be a red rash.

1:22:50 Caller Really?

1:22:50 Guest Yeah.

1:22:51 Drew And they're fungus you can get and allergic reactions you can get.

1:22:55 Caller Could that be something in the condom? Because sometimes-

1:22:56 Guest Potentially.

1:22:57 Drew But why didn't that affect the shaft of the penis then? I'm worried that it's herpies. It's sort of- Herpies still prove it otherwise. Put it that way.

1:23:06 Adam Oh, my God. Oh, boy. Hey, Alan. Yeah? I'm sorry, brother. But is it blistering or is it just kind of chafing?

1:23:14 Caller No, it's just like if you scratch it first.

1:23:16 Drew No, I've seen herpies on the scrotum just be like scrotum on fire.

1:23:21 Adam I rented that last week.

1:23:24 Caller I like a little variety, you know?

1:23:27 Caller Could it be caused by friction maybe if it was just too dry or something?

1:23:30 Guest Like she needed to shave or something?

1:23:31 Adam Two minutes. Come on.

1:23:33 Drew This is a skin reaction.

1:23:34 Adam Alan, you need to go down to get yourself checked out.

1:23:37 Drew While you have the rash, somebody needs to see that thing.

1:23:40 Adam See, this is why I use the condom with the mud guard on it. That's why the extra clamp that hangs down.

1:23:48 Drew I think you're just saying you just stuffed your underwear into the condom. No.

1:23:52 Adam Yeah, that's right. That's what I do. I'll actually tuck my scrotum into the condom with my penis. Not only do I get the protection, but it really fills things out.

1:24:03 Drew New invention.

1:24:04 Adam A little wider mouth.

1:24:06 Drew Condom shoe horn.

1:24:07 Adam The condom shoe horn. No, wait a minute.

1:24:10 Caller A boxer condom with like a little...

1:24:11 Guest He's writing something down here.

1:24:14 Adam I'm designing the condom. Yeah, we're at the end, like the last two inches of the condom, it would drop a little bit and leave you a little extra room for the sack tuckage.

1:24:25 Caller Yeah, all the way around too, because you don't want to be like trying to twist it.

1:24:28 Guest You're on this cup thing. You're on this cup thing.

1:24:30 Adam Yeah, I'm obsessed with that area of the male. And yeah, there's a little shoe horn thing that goes along with it.

1:24:36 Drew We'll call it control.

1:24:39 Adam Yeah, and also, also, and here's how it aids you as well, as I've talked about. If you have an unusually large scrotum, like Drew does, when you start having sex, it can actually be like a counterweight. You know, your butt goes that way, the scrotum goes this way, then your butt goes this way, and your scrotum goes that way. Before you know it, it's throwing you off. I mean, you're all over the place. Before you know it, the scrotum's actually moving your ass because of the direction it's going.

1:25:08 Drew The axis comes off a little bit, it'll just roll right off.

1:25:11 Adam Yeah, you could roll off and hit your head on the nightstand.

1:25:14 Caller Cross the room.

1:25:15 Adam Okay, but when you tuck the scrotum in and it becomes part of the penis, you don't get that counteraction. Very good. Very good.

1:25:22 Caller Stay away from those adult actresses.

1:25:24 Adam This is solid. Listen, I gotta pick a sponsor up, Drew. Forget about these skateboards with you. What about the, uh, the, uh, oh, we gotta come up with a name. What do we call it? The control top? Yeah. It's not catchy enough. The kids aren't going to go with it.

1:25:39 Caller We'll think about something, though, but Trojan could be interested in that.

1:25:41 Adam We'll work on this. Roll top. What's that? The, uh, no, I'm thinking, uh, let's see. What? Okay, we gotta take a break, and we'll come up with a good name for this after this.

1:25:52 Drew I feel so liquidy.

1:25:55 Caller Here's to Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. Loveline, I'll be right back. This is Loveline.

1:26:22 Adam Andy Macdonald is here. And now Chad and Bucky are both here. All professional skateboarders are all going to be at the Anaheim Convention Center this Friday, Saturday, and Sunday for the Invert 99. And it's all about BMX and skating. It'll be inline skating, I imagine.

1:26:44 Caller Music, mechanical bulls, everything.

1:26:46 Guest Yeah, yeah. If you don't make the cut, you get to ride the bull to get in there.

1:26:49 Adam Oh, really?

1:26:50 Guest Yeah.

1:26:50 Adam Well, it seems like just one big lawsuit. If I was an attorney, I would head down there and just sit on my car fender and wait for kids to come out and limping.

1:27:00 Guest Head your cards out.

1:27:01 Adam Do you have representation, son?

1:27:02 Caller I think we did it now. They're going to show up.

1:27:05 Adam You should have worn a cup like Mr. Corolla told you on the radio. Joe? Yeah. You're 16 years old. Yeah. What's up?

1:27:14 Caller I have this problem.

1:27:15 Caller All my friends, I go to Hollywood High School, right?

1:27:18 Adam Right.

1:27:18 Caller And all my friends, they insist that I'm gay or have some kind of feelings for guys. Why?

1:27:23 Adam Right.

1:27:23 Caller Right. And I... Why?

1:27:25 Adam You blow a couple of guys, you get a reputation. That's what happens.

1:27:28 Caller No, no. No, that's not that. I mean, in my mind, I'm straight, dude. I'm cool. I'm straight. But I guess by the way...

1:27:36 Caller You talk?

1:27:37 Caller Yeah, I talk.

1:27:38 Drew No, I don't get that from his voice.

1:27:40 Caller No, I don't get that. In the way I dress and stuff.

1:27:44 Drew You're sure it's not just your friends busting your chops and because they get aroused at you, they rise at you, you're like...

1:27:49 Caller Aroused?

1:27:49 Drew Well, they get aroused, you get upset about it. That's why they keep coming after you?

1:27:53 Caller No. Oh, well, I hang out with black gay friends, though.

1:27:56 Adam I mean...

1:27:57 Drew You're gay.

1:27:57 Caller Dude, I'm not.

1:27:58 Adam Drill, please. Drill, come on.

1:27:59 Caller Dude, I'm from Virginia, man.

1:28:01 Caller I mean...

1:28:02 Guest It doesn't matter where you're from, dude.

1:28:03 Caller No gays from Virginia.

1:28:04 Drew So they're basically what, though? They are sort of threatened by the fact that you hang out with gay guys?

1:28:09 Guest What?

1:28:09 Drew They're threatened by the fact that you hang out with gay peers, right? So they don't want you doing that, because it threatens them. They can't handle that. They're not comfortable with it.

1:28:18 Caller That's how teenagers are. You know, if they see a teenager hanging out that's not gay with gay people, they're going to automatically assume it. And especially high school, people like to talk to someone like that.

1:28:28 Drew But here's the thing. Their thinking is, jeez, he's my friend. I don't want to hang out with gay guys, because that makes me uncomfortable. Maybe I'm gay. So I'm going to bust his chops so we get him away from these other friends.

1:28:38 Caller Makes me feel better and look cool in front of my friends or whatever.

1:28:41 Adam Either way, the bottom line with your friends, whether they're banging your girlfriend or constantly harassing you, They're a-holes. If they ain't acting the way you want them to act, don't hang out with them. That's it. I mean, you give them a shot, but if they keep going, that's it. And I know when you're in high school or junior high, you think you're going to know these people for the rest of your lives, you don't. You really don't. You find out who your friends are. The ones that were really your friends, you stay tight.

1:29:09 Caller But some of your friends also just talk a little bit of stuff just for fun. It's like a teenage thing to do, you know what I mean? Oh, you're gay, you're hanging out with a gay guy, you know, that's just something that people do, you know, and not necessarily that they may not like you, but it's just something that people do.

1:29:23 Adam If you get upset about it, they're going to do it more because it works.

1:29:26 Caller Exactly.

1:29:27 Adam Alex, you're 17.

1:29:28 Caller Yeah, what up?

1:29:29 Adam What's up?

1:29:30 Caller Hey, Chad Muska.

1:29:31 Caller Yo, what's up, homie?

1:29:32 Caller Yeah, my question for you, I kind of got a problem for about a year now. I've been having like glance switch hard flips. I got that trick down. But for some reason, I-

1:29:41 Adam Hold on a second. What's the trick?

1:29:43 Drew You just start talking and speaking backwards.

1:29:44 Adam Well, here's the thing.

1:29:46 Caller It's actually skating backwards. It was a switch hard flip.

1:29:49 Adam Switch hard. Not only do skaters talk in a different language, but it's unclear even what the words are.

1:29:56 Caller Yeah. Just humor us.

1:29:59 Guest See, you have to get Tony Hawk's pro skater to understand it. All right.

1:30:03 Adam That is it.

1:30:04 Drew What is that?

1:30:04 Guest It's a video game.

1:30:05 Adam It's a video game. Didn't you know?

1:30:06 Caller You just got to practice, man. You know, this is skateboarding, you know, and we're kind of here to talk more on the line of like people, people's issues with sexuality and stuff like that. And I mean, skateboarding is something that like we're not really here to discuss.

1:30:20 Adam What trick is he talking about?

1:30:22 Guest It's an ollie with a kickflip with a shove it.

1:30:25 Caller Give me that finger board.

1:30:26 Guest Ollie.

1:30:27 Caller Let me show you.

1:30:28 Caller What's your question though, boss?

1:30:30 Caller This is regular stance.

1:30:31 Caller I have trouble with an ollie. For a year, I've been trying to bust him. I can't.

1:30:38 Caller It's all in practice, man. It's all in practice, you know. Just keep doing it. And if you have the desire to land that trick, then you're going to be able to land it, man.

1:30:45 Caller Word up. Alright, man.

1:30:47 Caller Keep skating, bro.

1:30:48 Adam He's pissed off. Listen, you know, people treat their life and their career and their hobbies like it's one of those video games where if you can look up the right maneuver, you can make it to the next level. It's not about someone letting you in on the password. It's just about you doing it a thousand times and not making it to 999 of them. You know what I mean? And whatever it is. I mean, people call it and they go, how do I get, how do I start a band? How do I become an actor? How do I become a professional skateboarder?

1:31:20 Caller Something that you just have to do.

1:31:21 Caller Just do it.

1:31:22 Caller Yeah, yeah.

1:31:22 Adam That's how you do it.

1:31:23 Caller And if you're not meant to do it, you won't, you know.

1:31:24 Adam That's right.

1:31:25 Caller Jake?

1:31:27 Caller Yes, sir.

1:31:27 Adam You're 24. What's up?

1:31:29 Caller Hey, well, I had called a couple of weeks ago and Drew wasn't there. I don't know. You have Dr. Doolittle or something. But he, my problem was that I was having, you know, a hard time staying faithful to this girl. And because I play in a band in Colorado, I'm out, I'm rocking around.

1:31:44 Adam Yeah, I remember this.

1:31:45 Caller Okay. So I finally break up with this girl, right? And one of the problems we've, we've been having was, I don't know, I just felt his sex wasn't so good. So I'd said something about that. So last night, she brings over another girl and we proceed to have a threesome. And I know on my part, total weakness for breaking down and getting back together with her. But I'll tell you, man, from day one, when hair one popped out of my body, I thought, wow, that would be the coolest thing to have two girls in the bed at the same time. Right. And it happened.

1:32:19 Adam Right.

1:32:19 Caller So now I'm worried. And then at the end of the night, well, in the beginning of the morning, I guess, she's all getting all lovey-dovey on me. And I just need, you know, I'm trying to find some resolution.

1:32:31 Adam Wait, who's getting lovey-dovey?

1:32:33 Drew The old ex-girlfriend.

1:32:34 Adam The ex.

1:32:34 Caller Oh, yeah, the ex-girlfriend.

1:32:35 Drew Why do you think she did this?

1:32:37 Caller Well, I, what, I'm trying to get back with her.

1:32:39 Drew Right. That's it.

1:32:42 Adam All right.

1:32:43 Caller So I say to her, listen, you know, later, you know, this is the no thanks for last night, but later on, what did you do actually in reality? Oh, there wasn't much we didn't do.

1:32:55 Drew No, no, no.

1:32:56 Caller What did you do in the morning?

1:32:58 Adam Who cares? I don't even care. Jake's just calling the state.

1:33:00 Caller He just wants to brag. Yeah, yeah.

1:33:03 Adam This is, this is, this is, you know, my my penis is so big, I can't ride a bicycle. What do I do? So what? You're in a band and you got to lay a big deal. What is his question though? Does he have a question?

1:33:17 Caller He wants, if he should go back with the girl or not.

1:33:19 Adam Yeah, but he doesn't like her.

1:33:20 Caller You don't want to be the girl that brings another girl. I mean, obviously you're not going to look at that person as the girl you love, as someone that you're having sex with two different people at the same time, you know?

1:33:28 Adam Well, next time you get horny, call her up and have some sex. But he doesn't sound like he's into her. He wanted to break up anyway, so fine. Erin.

1:33:35 Caller Hi.

1:33:36 Adam You're 13.

1:33:37 Caller Yeah.

1:33:37 Adam What's up?

1:33:38 Caller Um, this question is for Bucky Lasek. Um, like, you know how you're, like, fully, like, rivals with Tony Hogg?

1:33:47 Guest No, not really, you know.

1:33:48 Caller Not really? But, like, in the video, the end, you're, like, blowing him up and, um, like, boring. It was a joke. But, like, you know how, um, he, I heard, like, he's, after he did the second 900, he, like, retired or something. Is that true?

1:34:07 Guest Uh, he, he retired from competition. That's about it, though.

1:34:11 Caller And I was kind of wondering, like, are you going to try to attempt to do that, too, or?

1:34:15 Guest I haven't got the Cahungas to, to, I haven't, like, conjured up the, the wit to do it yet.

1:34:22 Adam Well, you could try, couldn't you?

1:34:24 Guest Well, I mean, I don't want to try it half, half-witted, you know? Like, if I'm going to go for it, I'm going to go for it. You know, I haven't really...

1:34:32 Adam How many revolutions can you get now? What's your, what's your highest number in terms of...

1:34:37 Guest Well, I've got the 720.

1:34:38 Adam 720. All right, so you only need another half, right?

1:34:43 Caller Another 180 and he's got the knot.

1:34:44 Guest Right.

1:34:45 Adam Yeah, man, it's almost there.

1:34:47 Guest Right.

1:34:48 Adam I know, but...

1:34:48 Caller A lot easier said than done.

1:34:49 Adam You know, you got, I know, because you got all the ones in front of it that are screwing with that last one. It's not like it exists in a bubble. But man, just a half a revolution away.

1:35:00 Guest Yeah, but it's all in the body.

1:35:02 Adam What if you turn the ramp on its side? Could you get something out of that?

1:35:06 Caller A quarter turn left.

1:35:07 Adam Oh man, but you know, the thing that's amazing about Tony is, is what is the guy? Six-five or something?

1:35:13 Guest Oh, he's tall.

1:35:14 Adam His body style doesn't seem to lend itself to doing...

1:35:17 Guest He's got the squat down though.

1:35:19 Adam No, that's why. No kidding. He can just... And normally... Oh, there's this guy. Cut him off the beer. Normally guys that excel in sports, even skateboarding, motocross, riding, gymnastics, things like that, are little guys who can spin a little faster because they can get... because they're smaller. I mean, you just don't see guys that are six-five of riding motocross very often. Guys that are six-five skating very often. And the idea that the one guy who is six-five has the 900 record is pretty...

1:35:56 Guest But he's not exactly built like Shaq, you know what I mean?

1:35:59 Adam No, I know. I know. I'm just...

1:36:01 Caller I think in skateboarding, taller guys have more advantage.

1:36:04 Adam No, they do.

1:36:05 Caller Oh, yeah, they do.

1:36:05 Adam No, for real. How many guys over six foot are there?

1:36:08 Caller Yeah, the taller guys definitely have a bigger advantage.

1:36:10 Adam How many guys over six foot are there?

1:36:11 Caller There's quite a few. There's a few out there. Those guys definitely have a bigger advantage in skateboarding.

1:36:17 Caller Well, talk about the small guys that can go way higher than any of the tall guys.

1:36:22 Adam There you go. All right, we got to take a little break. We're going to argue about this during the break.

1:36:30 Caller The phone number for Loveline is 1-800-LOVE.

1:36:33 Caller Loveline will be right back.

1:36:47 Caller This has been Loveline. The views expressed on Loveline are not necessarily those of the staff, the management, or the sponsors of this radio station. And are probably not the views of Westwood One Entertainment. Loveline is produced by Ann Wilkin Zingal. Now, please listen to this station longer.

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Wednesday, November 17, 1999