Episode 1000754887725

2:07 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience.

2:10 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.

2:14 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

2:16 Voiceover Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew.

2:18 Voiceover I'm not modeling anymore for the two of you. Loveline.

2:22 Adam Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, facts number, 310-854-4455. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist. Tonight, our guest is Stroke 9, and what we're going to do is since there's four guys in the band, and since we have a limited studio size here, we'll do a two-and-two thing. John McDermott and Greg Gelder are both here first, and then we'll swap them out. Or maybe they'll stay.

2:54 Yeah.

2:55 Adam Maybe they'll impress us so much.

2:56 If you like us.

2:56 Adam And we'll just lock the door and not let the other guys in the band in. But it's a good idea. You guys met in high school, right?

3:05 Yeah. We had a class in high school called Rock Band. It was a fully credited class.

3:14 Adam Oh my. Is this a public school?

3:16 It was like a little, we went to high school in Marin County.

3:20 Adam Oh my God.

3:21 Which is north of San Francisco across the Golden Gate Bridge, where all the hippies went after the summer love.

3:26 Adam Sure.

3:26 They started making money and then they started this high school. So it's a little Bohemian school.

3:32 Drew It's like where you went, Adam.

3:33 Adam So it's like-

3:34 Drew They call it ceramics as opposed to rock band.

3:38 Adam My friends would call that school like a free range school, like a hippie school.

3:43 Yeah. Yeah.

3:44 Adam You go there and it's not so much an emphasis on conformity in academics as it is on expressiveness and creativity.

3:54 Absolutely.

3:55 Adam But people still went to college, right?

3:57 Oh, yeah. It's like a full prep school. But you'd have a class like man and nature, and the final test would be like a weekend Fisher Fast thing. Oh, my God. We had a rock band class.

4:11 Adam It's amazing. Did you call your teachers by their first name?

4:15 Yeah.

4:16 Yeah, definitely.

4:21 Adam You'd tell your teacher like, hey, don't bogart that joint there, Josh. Oh, my God. How big was the school?

4:32 I think it was about 200 people. It was pretty small.

4:37 Adam I can't imagine growing up in Marin County. For those of you who don't know that part of the country, it's just picturesque. It's just beautiful. It's on the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge. I mean, it seems too healthy.

4:51 It's a bubble. Nothing bad ever happens there.

4:54 Adam I'll tell you why I wouldn't raise my kids in Marin. And this is going to be a compliment.

5:02 Somehow.

5:02 Adam Sometimes people say to me, why don't you, you know, I got a couple of good pairs of running shoes. They're great shoes. I always tell people, these are the most comfortable shoes I own. And they go, why don't you wear them all the time? And I go, too comfortable. And they go, what do you mean? I go, look, if I got used to wearing these shoes, then when I went running, it wouldn't feel like I was putting on a pair of shoes to go running.

5:21 Drew It's like we talked about Santa Barbara.

5:23 Adam Too nice.

5:23 Drew Yeah, too nice. You never leave.

5:24 Adam Where do you go?

5:25 Drew Yeah.

5:26 Adam Yeah. The world's... Now where do you go? You can't leave.

5:30 No.

5:31 Adam No, you got to go back tonight, right now.

5:33 Yeah, you know, it's nice. It's a very nice place.

5:37 Adam And then you go on a run. But in a way, I guess you want what you didn't have when you were growing up. I mean, I guess if you grew up in Marin, you'd want to go to Detroit.

5:47 Drew No, you want to go to Marin.

5:48 Adam Oh, OK.

5:48 No. Everyone wants to get away for college. We all... Everyone in the band went to different cities around the country just because they wanted to, you know, experience something a little different.

5:57 Drew So the rock band was formed during this class?

5:59 Yeah. And then we all went to college.

6:00 Drew And then reformed.

6:01 Yeah. We play over Christmas breaks and summer. And then when we finished college, we came back together and got to go in full time again.

6:10 Adam Sounds like it's too healthy. And everyone just must be into music and good musicians because it's not like you're pissed off and have anything to prove. I mean, here's my problem with three quarters of the bands that are currently out there. Instead of just being into music and playing their instruments, they're mainly pissed off and they just want to say something. And that's all right, but unless you're pissed off and 15 and there's not much in it for you, a lot of the time. I mean, I don't want to kill my parents, I don't want to commit suicide, I don't want to rape my girlfriend, I don't want to firebomb the school, so I can't really get into it. That's what I think a lot of bands are doing these days, but not you guys.

6:52 Caller No, we're not that angry.

6:56 Adam You're from Meran.

6:57 Caller You can't get angry. We're just into playing Pink Floyd songs and Zeppelin songs.

7:05 Caller Hiking and stuff like that.

7:07 Adam Eating mushrooms. Exactly. Did you go over the bridge a lot and just go hang in San Francisco?

7:13 Caller Yeah, we'd go to the Exploratorium and the Planetarium, go see the Pink Floyd exhibit.

7:18 Adam Yeah, that had changed the names of those places to the Stone-atarium and the Hesh-atarium because that's all they do. They have one out here at Griffith Park. They used to have a Lasarium. People just get stoned and then they recline the seat and then they stare at the ceiling and then they just play the dark side of the moon and that's it. Drew, you ever do that? It's a beautiful thing.

7:41 Drew High school, yeah. That was one of the very incipient stages of all that. It was like the equivalent of what you could do with one of those pointers now. Really? I'm not kidding. You think I'm kidding? I'm just sort of shaking around.

7:53 Adam Drew, do you realize if you had one of those laser pointers that sell at the cash register at a 7-Eleven, you could have ruled North America in 1974? Listen, I'm telling you something.

8:03 Drew If I could make a time machine, that's the first thing I would do. Take a handful of those and go back to 1973.

8:09 Adam Yeah. I'd probably grab a handful of watches and calculators and some porn where people were peeing on each other. I called this the VCR. People having sex in my hand in this black piece of plastic. But none of the TVs would be ready for it. All right. So well here, I think what we should do, what should we do? Well, Stroke 9 is a new band. So I think just so people know the song, people know who we're talking about, will play a song off of Nasty Little Thoughts, which is the CD that is out now. And this one, you ready there Anderson? Yeah. This one is called Little Black Backpack. All right. Now you know, Stroke 9.

12:36 Caller What did you think, guys? I like it.

12:38 Adam I knew the song, but I liked it before.

12:41 Caller I didn't know you knew all the words, though.

12:42 Caller That was amazing. He sang every damn word.

12:45 Caller That was beautiful.

12:45 Caller Dr. Drew nailed all the harmonies.

12:48 Caller He even air-guitared the solo. That was impressive.

12:52 Caller Rick?

12:53 Hello?

12:53 Adam You're 26?

12:54 Caller Yeah, hi. I'm a student in LA. All right. I recently had a breakup, and I don't know if what I did was wrong. I found out that my relationship by eight months, she had sort of been deceiving me about a really big thing.

13:15 Adam What was it?

13:16 Caller That she was intimate with her boss before she got her job, and then maintained like a weird relationship with him, and then she got a job, and then she continues to work for him. And I don't know, I couldn't deal with it.

13:33 Drew What kind of work environment is it?

13:35 Caller You know, it's like an office, and she like talks to him all the time, and it's just like, it's like, it's very small.

13:43 Drew So is it that she's still around him that troubles you, or the fact that she would engage in that kind of behavior to manipulate?

13:49 Caller Around him, and also the fact that she resents him. And she, over the months we were together, she would sort of bring up the fact that he felt a little threatened by me, and I was a little weirded out by that, because I didn't know the background. I just thought she had a weird, like a nasty boss, but she just has a lot of resentment issues towards him.

14:03 Adam Hold on a second here, Rick. What was that word he said?

14:08 Drew Gut money.

14:08 Adam Gut money? Threat money? What did you say?

14:12 Caller Front money?

14:13 Adam Front money?

14:14 Drew What does that mean?

14:16 Caller I have no idea what you said.

14:19 Adam You said something about 20 words ago that was akin to drutt money or gut money.

14:25 Caller No, no, no.

14:26 Adam What did you say?

14:27 Caller Nothing about drugs. It just bothered me.

14:30 Adam I'm just trying to figure out what you said.

14:31 Drew What the word was.

14:32 Adam Yeah. You said that...

14:35 Drew There was a lot of weird tension and gut money between them.

14:38 Caller Oh, a lot of resentment and weird tension.

14:41 Drew Weird tension, maybe?

14:42 Caller Yeah.

14:43 Adam No. I don't know what that was. I've got to figure out a way to play that back.

14:48 Caller Let's rewind. All right.

14:49 Adam Well, anyway, listen. She stopped sleeping with him before you met her, right?

14:54 Caller Right. But she still continues to work for him. And she told me that she had been in love with him. Yeah.

14:59 Adam All right. But they're broken up.

15:01 Caller Yeah. But she still works for him, though.

15:02 Adam So what?

15:03 Drew I think it's a reasonably healthy impulse to break to not continue to be involved with somebody that would engage in that kind of chaos.

15:09 Adam How do you know she still loves him?

15:10 Drew But it has nothing to do. I think it's the absolutely wrong reason to break up because you're jealous and nervous about her being around someone she had slept with at one time.

15:20 Adam How do you know that she still loves him?

15:23 Caller Well, I don't know. I just don't know. But it just bothered me.

15:28 Adam What do you mean you don't know? You just said she's still in love with him.

15:30 Caller She told me that she had been in love with him. Had been.

15:32 Adam She had been.

15:33 Caller What's that?

15:34 Drew Had been.

15:35 Adam Hey, Rick, come on. You're 26, right? Yeah. You really sound like you're 16.

15:40 Drew What are you studying?

15:41 Caller Psychology.

15:43 Adam Wow. You got to really crack the books there, Rick. You not just look at the pictures, you got to read the words, the captions underneath the pictures.

15:52 Caller Okay. So you guys are saying I overreacted.

15:54 Drew Yeah.

15:55 Adam No, I am. Listen, here's what's going on. Okay.

15:58 Drew Hold on a second.

15:59 Adam It's a good thing. Guys have a lot of energy in this department.

16:02 Drew He's 26.

16:04 Adam You're just getting out of that. How old are you guys? Because you may still have some energy in this department.

16:10 Drew I'm 26.

16:11 Caller 27.

16:12 Drew Just getting out.

16:15 Adam You know when you're 17 and it's like you found out that your girlfriend made out with this guy or slept with this other guy, it's like you want to kill the guy or you want to punish her, or there's all this energy surrounding it. Then when you get like 23, 24, you realize, all right, she slept with a few guys. I'd hate to have to sit down with all of them and have some sort of discussion group, but she slept with a few guys, no big deal. Then as you get a little older, I mean, when you get older, it's like-

16:41 Drew Start encouraging.

16:42 Adam You're golfing with like her ex-three husbands and you're talking about how tight her ass is. You could care less. I don't know what happens later. I think that's when you lose your will to live later on in life.

16:54 Drew The Sasha level has dropped to zero.

16:56 Adam But what Rick is, is Rick is a 26-year-old who sounds a little more like 21, 22. So chronologically, he should be coming out of this sort of jealous weirdo period, but he's sort of still in it. And he dropped her and he's making all these fantasies of, she was in love with him, she admitted it, she never told me.

17:17 Drew In fact, jealous weirdo.

17:18 Adam She dated a guy, she ended up working with the guy, and then she's dating Rick. I mean, that's it. She's not cheating with him, she's not staying out late with him.

17:28 Drew If in fact she slept with him to get the job, which he kind of alleges.

17:31 Adam No, no. Rick, she didn't do that, did she?

17:35 Caller She met him and slept with him before they got the job, and then maintained a weird relationship with him, and then he liked her.

17:40 Drew All right. So just in bad terms.

17:42 Adam All right. And they've been broke? When's the last time they had sex?

17:45 Caller I don't know.

17:46 Adam A year ago?

17:47 Caller I don't know.

17:48 Drew What do you think?

17:48 Adam Six months ago, goofball?

17:50 Caller I don't know.

17:51 Adam How long have you been going with her, you idiot?

17:53 Caller Eight months.

17:54 Adam Eight months. You think she's cheated on you?

17:56 Caller No.

17:56 Adam Well, then it's been at least eight months, right?

17:58 Caller No, it's probably been longer.

18:00 Drew It's been like ten years? All right.

18:02 Adam Listen, Tardo. I'm sorry. Listen, when I say a year, I don't know. Six months? I don't know. Well, of course you know. If she hasn't cheated on you, it's been at least eight months.

18:12 Drew Egotard.

18:12 Adam Egotard. That's my new word. It's huge ego meets retard. It's grandiosity meets stupidity. That's the people that call this show. It's the most dangerous kind of individual. Psychology major.

18:26 Drew It seems to be just generally American.

18:28 Adam All right. Let's get back together with her so you can torture her more. That's what I say. Trent?

18:33 Yeah.

18:33 Adam You're 15.

18:34 Caller Yeah.

18:34 Adam What's up? You're 16. All right.

18:37 Caller Hey, you guys roll, man. Just got to tell you that.

18:39 Adam Thanks.

18:40 Caller No, you guys don't hear that enough.

18:43 Adam Yeah. All right. You smoke weed?

18:46 Caller It's that laugh.

18:47 Caller Yeah.

18:47 Caller It's that laugh that gives it away.

18:49 Caller I did. Yeah.

18:49 Caller Yeah.

18:50 Adam You did?

18:50 Caller Quite a bit.

18:51 Caller Actually, I got in trouble for school for doing that.

18:53 Drew Yeah. We're shocked.

18:55 Caller I haven't been in school since.

18:56 Drew Oh, really? You had possession?

18:58 Caller It's been a full year.

18:59 Drew You haven't been in school in a year?

19:01 Caller Yeah.

19:01 Drew Don't your parents have some concerns?

19:04 Caller Yeah. They're really against it.

19:08 Caller They're not being in school?

19:10 Caller Yeah.

19:10 Drew They can't require you to go to school?

19:12 Adam Yeah. Hold on. I may be confused. Are your parents against the learning process or are they against you not being in school?

19:19 Caller They're against me not being in school.

19:20 Drew Why aren't you in school then?

19:22 Caller For distribution of marijuana.

19:23 Drew So no one will take you to school?

19:25 Caller No. The school has kicked me out for a full year.

19:29 Drew I see.

19:29 Adam And what do you do for that year?

19:31 Caller I go to optional school for two hours a day, which sucks big time.

19:37 Adam Yeah. It's really great. And that would really just hit you with a bat, so they can really knock all the brain cells out of you. It's like the guy gets busted for weed at school, we'll get him to stay home, then he can go to optional school for two hours a day. Where basically you just go in and they tell you to be quiet and try to discipline you for two hours, then you go home and smoke more weed.

19:58 Caller What are they trying to teach you, you know, kicking you out of school? That's actually kind of a good thing for the kid.

20:03 Adam Yeah. Good thing for you or good thing for the people you're being separated from?

20:07 Caller Usually the badder kids would love it being out of school, but you know, I wish I was back in school.

20:13 Adam You do? Yeah. You don't think you can get yourself reinstated in?

20:16 Caller Oh, I've tried and tried.

20:18 Drew Why don't you get some treatment for your marijuana addiction?

20:21 Caller Oh, I have. I quit.

20:23 Adam How long ago?

20:24 Caller About four months ago.

20:27 Adam Uh-huh. And are you in any kind of treatment?

20:31 Caller No, not at all, self-treatment.

20:32 Drew Why don't you get some treatment for it, Trent?

20:34 Adam Well, it's been four months.

20:35 Caller You know, I have. I've been in, like, a counseling, abuse counseling.

20:41 Drew Yeah.

20:42 Caller Yeah. And it's also like a family thing. See, my dad also distributes it to family relatives. Yeah.

20:50 Adam Oh, boy. What's he do? Is he work construction or something?

20:54 Caller No, he's delivering, like, medical supplies.

20:58 Adam Well, that makes sense.

20:59 Caller And now he refurbishes houses.

21:02 Drew That wouldn't be construction.

21:02 Adam That wouldn't be construction, would it? No, no. What's he refurbish furniture?

21:07 Caller My uncle owns a real estate company, and he goes and fixes up the houses for twice as much.

21:13 Adam I see. So he puts in hardwood floors and panes and things like that?

21:17 Caller Yeah, everything, yeah.

21:18 Adam Okay. Well, as long as he's not in the construction business.

21:22 Caller Yeah.

21:22 Adam Okay. As long as he's not nailing any, you know, 16-penny nails or putting any primer on any wood. That's all right. Now, Trent, so your question is?

21:35 Caller You're going to get after me for this one, Adam. But I was wondering some advice on how to quit masturbation.

21:41 Adam That's the only thing you got left. You got no school, you got no pot.

21:46 Drew How much you doing?

21:48 Caller Once a day.

21:49 Adam Once a day?

21:50 Drew Big deal. Why do you want to stop?

21:52 Caller I just don't feel morally right about it.

21:55 Drew Morally right or your self-esteem tends to drop?

21:58 Caller Um, just morally.

22:00 Drew What's the moral issue?

22:02 Caller I don't, you know, just doing it after it makes me feel bad.

22:05 Drew Alright, that's your esteem. You feel bad about yourself. That has nothing to do with morality.

22:09 Caller Like a little bit of innocence is gone, you know.

22:11 Adam Well, it's a little bit of innocence in the hamper, but you're making more.

22:16 Drew It's a matter of feeling bad about yourself for not being able to go out there and engage in life with your peers. And it's really, if you were involved in your life in any way, I think some of that feelings of lack of worth tend to improve.

22:30 Adam Don't try to stop that, because a week into it you'll go insane and try to kill somebody.

22:34 Drew It has nothing to do with morality, nothing.

22:36 Caller No, no. Stroke 9, I mean, is, you know, encourages masturbating.

22:41 Drew Does the name of Stroke 9 have something to do with that?

22:45 Caller It's developed a meaning, ironically enough.

22:48 Drew What did it originally mean?

22:49 Caller Originally it was from a poem. It had a very, very good meaning. It was from a TS. Eliot poem, but then, you know, the Stroke 9 masturbation thing just sort of, you know, overshadowed that.

23:00 Drew Well, it was more like the Stroke of 9?

23:02 Caller It was more like stroking nine times.

23:05 Drew But I mean...

23:05 Caller Originally it's from the TS. Eliot poem, The Wasteland, and there's just a loose reference, you know, it's taken from there, but we really, when we named it, we didn't know that much about the poem.

23:17 Caller We knew about masturbating.

23:20 Adam You see, nine's a little light. Up and down is one, or up is one and down is one?

23:25 Drew Up and down is one.

23:26 Adam Up and down is one?

23:27 Caller Up and down is one. So, you know, think if you've been on a plane, and you can one-touch it conceivably, you know?

23:34 Adam It'd be an interesting game show. Like, do you remember when they used to do Name That Tune?

23:39 Caller It is like, yes.

23:40 Adam Where they'd go like, I can name that tune in six notes, and name that tune in five notes, and then they'd go.

23:46 Drew Name that tune.

23:46 Adam Name that tune. And the work show would play. It'd be great. It's like, I can shoot my wand in 15 strokes.

23:58 Drew Shoot that wad.

23:58 Adam I can do it in 30. Shoot that wad. That's what it's called. Shoot that wad. No, seriously, I don't know. I'm going to count. I'm going to count tonight. I'm going to figure out what I'm good for, because I don't know. I couldn't tell you, honestly, if it was like 175 or 57. I don't know what it is. But once I learn it, then I'll count, then I'll try to become more efficient.

24:22 Drew Very important data.

24:23 Caller I think it would be hard to count, but it would be hard to concentrate while counting.

24:27 Adam Yeah, you're right.

24:29 Caller You need a partner.

24:30 Adam You're right.

24:30 Caller You need someone else to count.

24:32 Adam I need a... You know the guys who stand at the door of the club with the hand clicker? I need that guy. Yeah, a guy in a yellow windbreaker.

24:41 Caller You're in a referee's uniform.

24:42 Adam Like a three-foot-long flashlight smacked me in the leg when I get to 100. You're at 100. Okay, don't talk because now I'm at zero. Do you know what I'm saying? Now we're starting... You weren't supposed to talk. Now we got to start over. All right. Stroke 9 is here. We're going to take a little break. When we come back, we'll speak to Miranda. She performed oral sex on a guy now can't breathe. Seems like we should talk to her now. Take it out.

25:07 Caller She'll be all right.

25:08 Adam Okay. We'll get to her.

25:10 Caller She'll be all right. Take it out.

25:43 Adam It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there, phone number, 1-800-LE-VE-191. John and Greg are both here from Stroke 9. Nasty Little Thoughts is the name of the CD. We'll hear something else off of that before the night is true. And when we left off, I think we were going to talk to Miranda.

26:03 Caller Hey.

26:04 Adam Hey.

26:05 Caller I'm Miranda.

26:07 Drew You sound like you're breathing okay.

26:09 Caller No, I really stuffed up.

26:11 Drew Well, you got a cold.

26:13 Caller No, you don't understand. Okay. Like this past weekend, I got to charm like one of the most popular motocross stars in California.

26:21 Drew You got to what them?

26:23 Adam Charms are euphemism for bluff.

26:25 Drew Is that something that was just invented tonight or something I should have known all along?

26:28 Adam Charm. You know, she charmed him.

26:30 Caller I charmed him. I entertained him.

26:32 Drew This is like charming a snake.

26:34 Caller Oh, you know it. I got the snake out of his baby.

26:39 Drew You'll be proud of this someday.

26:41 Caller Here's my problem. Okay.

26:43 Adam For your kids, especially.

26:45 Caller You guys, I'm addicted to giving heads. I love it. I get off on it. I have orgasms.

26:52 Adam Really?

26:53 Caller Yeah, I love it. It's awesome.

26:57 Adam We make quite a team, you and I. Quite a team.

27:01 Caller Drew, I've done it for three hours.

27:03 Adam Three hours?

27:04 Caller And I loved it. I have major wicked orgasms.

27:07 Adam For three hours? And where was the guy? Was he-

27:11 Drew Attached?

27:11 Adam Was he underneath his penis? Three hours?

27:15 Caller Yes, but no, he came.

27:16 Adam And then the coroner came back in and threw her out.

27:18 Caller No, but he came so many times, Drew.

27:21 Drew What are you talking to me?

27:23 Adam Stop talking to Drew. I'm the one with the penis.

27:27 Caller But Adam, I could serve you though.

27:29 Adam Well, I'll bet you, you're like McDonald's over there.

27:32 Caller I'd be counting for you to see how many times you stroke it.

27:35 Adam Thank you.

27:35 Drew Miranda, Miranda, relax. Miranda, please relax.

27:38 Adam Now, how do you perform with that stuffed up nose? Do you just have an emergency trachea hole that you breathe through?

27:45 Drew Scuba.

27:45 Caller No, this just happened. See, he's a really popular motorist. And I have a boyfriend, but he didn't know about this. So I perform oral sex on him. And Saturday night, this happened Friday night, but Saturday night, I started getting a sore throat. And well, then Sunday morning, I woke up and I couldn't breathe. And my lungs and my back, everything hurt.

28:03 Drew Miranda, Miranda, this is going around.

28:05 Caller Huh?

28:06 Drew This is what's going around right now.

28:08 Caller But is that normal?

28:09 Adam Hold on, I can see Drew walking home, his wife's in bed, the pile of Kleenex on her chest. You bitch!

28:15 Caller You slut!

28:16 Adam You little slut.

28:18 Drew Miranda, it's body fluid you're supposed to do.

28:19 Adam Blowing motorcycle riders, aren't you?

28:22 Drew And it may well be that he was coming down with it and gave it to you, or it may just be something you contracted from the community.

28:27 Adam All right. Hey, Miranda, anything happened to you that we should know about? You sound a little nutty.

28:34 Caller I like nuts. No, I'm a nut.

28:36 Adam By the way, hold on. Quick tip for all the folks that I accuse of being nutty. Try not to have my statement followed up with that maniacal laughter. You know, like go, okay, that's your opinion. You know, not that sort of ghoulish mad scientist crazed a laugh right after I label you as nutty, because that tends to sort of solidify my nuts thoughts. Thank you. Miranda?

29:01 Caller Adam, nothing happened to me. I'm the only child. I just love to give head. I'm addicted to it.

29:06 Adam Did you have like a stuffed animal that was shaped like a penis or something that was in your crib?

29:12 Caller You know, I had Winnie the Pooh and he had pretty stiff legs.

29:16 Drew And very often people with bulimia have interesting eating, interesting sexual compulsions.

29:22 Caller I've suffered from anorexia and bulimic.

29:25 Adam Well, now Dr. Drew, another lucky guest. Everybody's different. We're all unique in our own way. Drew just happens to get lucky once in a while. And how's your mom doing? Is she?

29:38 Caller My mom suffered with an anorexia and bulimic.

29:41 Drew And your mom was very involved in your upbringing, wasn't she?

29:45 Caller But I love my mom. I'm an only child.

29:46 Drew I'm sure you do. But man, she unloaded on you.

29:49 Adam Put you into ballet class at four?

29:52 Caller Yeah, I did it for 13 years.

29:54 Adam All right. Come on. How about some love? You guys are another lucky, wild, lucky guess.

30:01 Caller Because you guys have got tips or something.

30:03 Adam Crazy lucky guesses.

30:05 Drew Nobody interviews them.

30:06 Caller It's true, folks. They can really do this.

30:08 Adam All right, Miranda. Well, I guess you're perfectly normal. There's nothing going on.

30:13 Drew And by the way, no, Miranda. Why do you keep addressing me, Miranda? What do we got going here? What do I need to...

30:20 Caller Is there something wrong with me?

30:21 Drew Yes, you have an eating disorder. And it's interesting. I was giving a lecture with a psychiatrist the other day, and he said, and he made a very provocative statement. He said all codependency is a result of child abuse, which is this kind of issue that she's got here, is a form of child abuse, which is an over intrusive, annihilating, non-empathic parent. Not a bad person, not ill-meaning, but completely unable to acknowledge Miranda as a separate person with separate needs. It's all about the parents and their needs, the child just becomes a sort of a tool for them.

30:56 Adam It's great too, because once women sort of spin out, no one's going to stop them. I mean, if you want to sort of have your own blow-a-thon, ain't no man in the world going to stop you. Guys, society does not let us spin out that way, at least sexually, because we can't find partners. If she's a good-looking girl who was in ballet for 13 years, her mom was over intrusive, and her problem is she's got to blow everyone who comes in front of her, then she's going to do it, and no one's going to stop her.

31:25 Drew If you're in California, Delamo Treatment Center is a nice place for sexual compulsivities.

31:29 Adam All right. Mustafa?

31:31 Yes. Hi. First of all, I want to say that I'm a long-time listener, and first-time caller. Adam and Drew, you both are great. I'm a big fan of your work.

31:39 Drew Mustafa, really your name?

31:40 Caller Mustafa, yeah.

31:41 Drew Isn't, like, a character in, like, Aladdin or something?

31:44 Caller No, that's a- Lion King.

31:45 Adam That's a Lion King.

31:46 Caller Lion King, that's right.

31:47 Drew Lion King, yeah. Calo Disney films got to blend together for me. One long montage.

31:51 Adam What's up? That's a pretty popular name, though, isn't it, in certain parts of the world?

31:56 Caller Yeah, I'm from Iran.

31:57 Adam Yeah, Mustafa.

31:58 Drew Okay.

31:59 Adam There was a boxer named Mustafa. I can't think of the guy's name. It's a man's name. Yeah. No chicks, you know, no gay guy's name, Mustafa. No way. Mustafa's like one of those guys, he's like, don't you get caught stealing Mustafa's stuff? It cut your finger off. You don't mess with Mustafa.

32:16 Drew All right, Mustafa. What's up? Yeah.

32:19 Adam It's like part mustache, part mafia. You know what I mean? It's a very virile masculine name.

32:25 Drew Part staff.

32:25 Adam Part staff, part mustache, part mafia. Never would mess with Mustafa. All right, Mustafa. Your last name is not like Pussy Stein, is it? Because then you got a dilemma. She said, I don't know. I might screw it up.

32:40 Drew You haven't heard his question yet.

32:41 Adam All right. What is it?

32:44 Caller Today I was masturbating and I think I did it over more than 20 times. In the evening when I was changing my clothes, I noticed blood on my boxes.

32:54 Adam Twenty times in what time period?

32:58 Caller Like in a day.

32:59 Drew Wow.

33:00 Caller Solid. Yay.

33:01 Drew Didn't that hurt at the end?

33:02 Caller I was on the internet all day.

33:03 Drew On the internet. Were you having like powder come out towards the end?

33:07 Caller I mean, no, I didn't see that.

33:09 Caller A bead on the tip.

33:12 Drew Hey, listen. Let's put it this way. If you had an awful cough and were coughing a whole bunch, would it surprise you that eventually a little bit of blood came up? You strained and coughed and broke a blood vessel and something came through like blood? That's kind of the same idea here.

33:28 Caller Okay. I have one more question. One of my uncle, he's been married for more than five years, but he doesn't have any kids. His cousin told me that he used to masturbate a lot when he was like 19, and he lost his mojo.

33:41 Drew His mojo?

33:43 Adam He lost his mojo.

33:44 Drew His chi?

33:45 Adam His chi, yeah. Yeah. No, that's not true.

33:48 Drew Mojo wasn't that Austin Powers?

33:51 Caller Yeah. It's not true. If you masturbate too much, you can't produce kids.

33:56 Drew No, no, no, no, no, no.

33:59 Caller I mean, I was just wondering why do I do this?

34:02 Drew Well, again, we're having a theme evolve tonight, sexual compulsivity.

34:06 Caller Yeah.

34:07 Adam Listen, I've been sitting here for two minutes trying to defend 20 times, and I can't do it, Mustafa, so that's a problem. You know, 20, I mean, how often do you put yourself down for 20? It's a pretty big order.

34:22 Caller I know.

34:23 Adam I mean, do you do it? Have you ever done that before?

34:26 Caller Oh, masturbation.

34:27 Adam 20 times?

34:28 Caller Oh, no, no, no, never. I mean, today, I don't know what happened.

34:32 Adam What would a normal day be? Just 18?

34:36 Caller No, like two or three.

34:37 Adam Two or three.

34:38 Drew A day.

34:38 Caller Yeah.

34:39 Adam All right.

34:39 Drew Yeah.

34:40 Adam Okay. Well, listen, you know, I used to, you know, if you really think about it, though, I would get three or four just out of the, you know, Vegas ad in the back of the sports page when I was, you know, 1979, you know. So if I had the Internet, there's no telling where me and my penis could have went.

34:59 Drew I predict that he was exposed to something around the age of eight, eight to ten. Not in something awful, but just some premature sexual material sometime.

35:06 Adam You know, you know what I'm saying? I mean, what if you had access to the Internet when you were 17 years old? I mean, nonstop porn, you know, being just hard lined right into the house, just anything. And all these guys can work this computer like a top gun pilot in the cockpit. You know what I mean? I mean, they know they can get to anywhere on the web. I mean, what would it have done to you? Would you have ever have gone? You would have just, you've not gone out of the house in like 11 years, and you've gone out to see the sunlight for the first time. You'd be like a mushroom. You know what I mean? I mean, what would you have done? I mean, imagine being 15, 16 years old. There's a window, a port to pornography, just sitting right on the desk. A lot of these guys just have it in their room. Would you have gone out? How could you have? You'd have to run home and masturbate.

36:01 Caller Oh, yeah. Yeah, I had enough trouble, you know, Sports Illustrated or something tame like that.

36:07 Adam Yeah, I had a frisky magazine. Frisky, where the chicks wore the panties with the ruffles on it that were higher on the side than they were at the crotch somehow. You know, like nine inches high on the side and like maybe just seven where the crotch was and, you know, the beehive hairdos, black and white, made it be one color picture in there. Sexy. I got it done with that. Of course, I was a pioneer. Jay?

36:34 Yeah.

36:35 Adam You're 17.

36:36 Caller Yeah.

36:36 Adam You're on to Stroke 9.

36:38 Caller Hi, how you guys doing? Good. All right, I have a real quick question. When I get really aroused, there's like a, it's not a whole lot, but a little like kind of a couple drops of a clear discharge.

36:52 Drew Precum. It's very concentrated in sperm. Be careful with that.

36:56 Caller Are you serious?

36:57 Drew I'm dead serious. That's why you got to wear a condom.

36:59 Caller So there's like a, I never had sex or anything, but there's a possibility it might have had just a barely, a little contact on the outside of my girlfriend, you know?

37:12 Drew Well, why don't you get it in the morning after pill, just to be sure?

37:15 Caller Okay, where can I get that at? Just any pharmacy?

37:17 Drew Well, you need a prescription for it, so Planned Parenthood, or there's a number, 1-888-NOT-TOO-LATE, which is a number that can refer you to a pharmacy near you.

37:26 Adam Should she take it this time around or just have it in general?

37:29 Drew How long ago did this happen?

37:30 Caller This happened like tonight.

37:31 Drew Yeah, you should take it this time around. Sooner the better.

37:34 Adam Well, what are we doing? Are you having sex with her?

37:36 Caller No, we didn't have sex. I never put it in or anything. It just might have got the very outside.

37:43 Drew That's a possible phrase. It's rare and likely. But hey, that morning after field work so well, why?

37:48 Adam All right. But what are you doing, Jay, with your penis?

37:51 Drew You want Jay to be dad?

37:52 Caller Well, no, we have a line. And we just like-

37:57 Drew There's a plane. They have a plane.

37:59 Caller We went to the line and I just want to be there.

38:01 Adam Oh, I see. I see. The plane. Yeah. You're not going to break the plane.

38:05 Drew An airplane, but like an end zone plane.

38:08 Caller And she like, she had-

38:09 Adam The neutral zone right there.

38:11 Caller Yeah. She had a lot of discharge already and I just want to make sure. I mean, maybe if it-

38:16 Drew Yeah, yeah. Listen, it's very unlikely, but with these post emergency contraceptives available, why not take advantage of that and really make it extremely unlikely?

38:25 Adam Hey, Jay, when are you going to have sex?

38:27 Caller Probably after I get married.

38:29 Adam To her?

38:30 Drew Yeah.

38:30 Adam Oh, okay.

38:31 Caller I just want to clarify that.

38:33 Adam I'm going to marry this other chick, but I'll come back and bang you.

38:35 Caller Don't worry.

38:36 Adam So let's save ourselves.

38:37 Caller Is there any possible way that I could get it without having a prescription?

38:42 Drew Do you live in Washington?

38:43 Caller No.

38:44 Drew Can you get to the state of Washington? That's where they have it without prescription. There are a couple of the states, I don't know which ones they are, they have some pilot programs going, but I don't know where they are. Okay.

38:52 Adam All right.

38:53 Drew Call 1-8-8, not too late.

38:54 Adam Hey, Jay.

38:55 Yeah.

38:56 Adam When are you getting married? I mean, you're not going to be a holdout for another three, four years doing this.

39:02 Caller I don't know, probably not. I'm almost 18, so I'll be finished with high school pretty soon.

39:08 Adam Listen, don't marry her. Come on. She's too young. Have some sex, will you? Put the condom on. It's all right. Listen, God's disappointed anyway. Understand? Taking your penis and wiping it around her vagina like some sort of a marks a lot board. Come on. He knows what's going on. Understand? He knows there's sin in your heart and on the tip of your penis. Okay? Screw balls. Listen, here's why I don't like this. Because how many times can you be naked with that kind of 17-year-old erection, rubbing it around the threshold there? Now, okay, but we're not going to have sex until we get married. Well, of course, you're going to get, I mean, You got to get married after a 17-year-old has that willpower. Yeah. I mean, how many more episodes of being naked, not having sex, having that 17-year-old erection are you going to have? Screw it. Let's get married.

40:03 Drew But this is where women have power, right? If they choose to use it.

40:07 Caller They're just going to get married so they can have sex, though.

40:09 Drew But if women want to choose to use that power, that's where it is.

40:12 Adam Absolutely.

40:13 Drew Right there.

40:14 Adam Yeah. All right. Okay. I'm saying, all right, I made my point. We're going to take a little break. Stroke 9 is here. We'll come back. We'll speak to Leland, who got himself some crabs, went on a one night stand, and wants to get rid of them after this.

40:35 Caller We'll be right back with more Love Line.

41:03 Adam Yes, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. John and Greg are both here from Stroke 9. I see that David Arquette is coming in here tomorrow night. All right. Last time we saw David, it was under semi-embarrassing circumstances. I swear to God, what was it? One, two months ago?

41:22 Drew Something like that.

41:23 Adam Two months ago, I started the show by talking to the guest. I can't even remember who the guest was.

41:30 Drew Was it being John Malkovich folk?

41:33 Adam Probably was some of the cast from Being John Malkovich. I was asking if John Malkovich was really as nutty as he seems to be. They said, yeah, he's pretty whacked. I said, I know there's a lot of nutballs in this business, and I don't understand how they show up to the set on time, how they memorize their lines, how they hit their marks. Acting seemed like a fairly tall order if you're really nuts. And then I went on to cite David Arquette as one of the guys I know who's nuts in this business. And it's like he's nuts, but he plays a part of a small town sheriff. He hits his mark. He does his lines. He tapes three months in Virginia or something. I don't know how nutty people are able to get on planes and stuff. And David Arquette is like, you know, he's kind of nuts.

42:28 Drew He's a nice guy. We said that.

42:29 Adam I said he was a nice guy. I said I like him and I know him, but he's definitely nuts. And they said, well, aren't you worried David's going to come over here and kick your ass? And I said, David is so nuts he couldn't find the studio. And David walked through that door right there about four minutes later. Still on the radio. Still in the first segment. Walked right through the door. Started screaming at him. Hadn't seen him in six months. Wasn't coming on the show until tomorrow. This was two months ago. Just walked right through the door, started yelling at him.

43:00 Caller Just driving by or something?

43:01 Adam Just driving by.

43:02 Caller That's great.

43:03 Adam Driving, yeah, looks like he's just been eating steroids and lifting weights for the last six months too. Purse right through the door. Said he was driving home from the Lakers game, heard me talking, smacking right to the studio. So nuts I couldn't find the studio, huh?

43:18 Caller It's there, right?

43:21 Adam David, come on. There's dangerous nuts and there's funny nuts. Come on, buddy. Yeah, it was surreal. It was surreal to have somebody you were just talking about standing right before you. It wasn't during a commercial, there was no knock on the door and there was no heads up, there's nothing on the screen. He just came walking through the studio door. Oh, man, talk about him. My life is like just one more humiliating episode after the next. Terry?

43:51 Caller Yes.

43:52 Adam What's up?

43:54 Caller Yeah, I'm trying to find out some information on a... My daughter went through a drive-through restaurant and received a pop. Not knowing she took a drink out of this pop, there was blood in the pop that she tasted.

44:07 Adam How old are you?

44:09 Caller I'm 41.

44:10 Drew You must be calling from the midwest somewhere.

44:13 Caller I'm calling from the Cincinnati area.

44:14 Adam Cincinnati, yeah.

44:16 Drew Pop. Pop doesn't exist in the coast.

44:18 Adam Yeah, pop here, that means that someone's dad got in the car.

44:22 Caller All right, yeah. Anyway, she got blood. She tasted blood and she went to the doctor and got tested.

44:29 Drew Did you see blood?

44:31 Caller Please?

44:31 Drew Did you see blood? Yes. You saw blood in the cup?

44:35 Caller It was blood on the cup and in the pop that she tasted. But she digested some blood.

44:42 Adam Could you see the blood inside of the soda or did she just say she tasted it?

44:48 Caller The blood was on the outside of the cup. She said there was a fingerprint on it.

44:53 Drew I see, so like a bloody finger had handled the cup and she tasted it.

44:57 Caller She started to wipe it off and then she realized that neither her or her husband was bleeding.

45:03 Drew I see.

45:04 Adam So basically, was she sucking on it through a straw or drinking it?

45:09 Caller No, she took the lid off the cup and took a sip out of it.

45:13 Drew We got the picture.

45:15 Adam Here's what I'm guessing what happened. Somebody had a cut on their hand, got blood on the outside of the cup, then when she went to sip on it, her lip or tongue got on it, but it probably wasn't dripping inside of the soda.

45:25 Drew Probably not.

45:26 Adam Either way, she ingested some.

45:27 Drew Anyway, it's an exposure and it's a very tiny exposure, but it's realistic. It's not the kind of thing you're going to get HIV from.

45:35 Adam Why not?

45:36 Drew Because you need a large sort of blood or body fluid volume, because the virus is so dilute.

45:46 Adam What about ingesting it that way? Is it better or worse than getting it in an open cut, let's say?

45:52 Drew That's better. Right into the mouth.

45:54 Caller Yeah, that's what the doctor seemed to, you know, you got gums, you know, going through the gums or your teeth.

45:59 Drew Well, actually, the pH of the mouth environment is not hospitable to the HIV. And hepatitis C, there's debate about whether it can be transmitted that way. So that's not likely. Hepatitis B can be transmitted that way, though. So has she ever had hepatitis B vaccine?

46:16 Caller That I have no idea.

46:17 Drew Did they suggest giving her hepatitis B immunoglobulin?

46:19 Caller I know she went to the doctor, and they did blood work on her, on her and her husband.

46:24 Drew So the question is whether she should get hepatitis B immunoglobulin. I really doubt that anyone would recommend antiviral medication for that kind of limited low-risk exposure.

46:35 Adam You mean like getting on the cocktail before the HIV sets in?

46:40 Drew It's interesting this came up because I was wondering if they were going to start recommending it for hepatitis C and or hepatitis B. And not for hepatitis C, it's turning out. They just recently, the CDC Centers for Disease Control issued some policy on that. So its question is whether they get hepatitis B immunoglobulin. And if she doesn't get that, certainly should have hepatitis B vaccine.

47:04 Adam Hi. This guy still calls it pop, so he didn't really digest anything. He just said, you know what I love? I want to see how he repeats that. Missy, you got to get the Hesychias, Hesychias D with the moon, the moon babula. Your babulates is all off.

47:30 Adam And some braggots, and some brod's, and some breezamas.

47:35 Caller Stroke 9 loves the Midwest.

47:36 Adam I just sung the theme from the old Bill Cosby song. Ba-dum-ba, ba-dum-ba-dum, ba-dum-ba. Hoo, ba-dum-ba-dum, ba-dum-ba.

47:46 Drew Hoo, Lord.

47:47 Adam Ba-ba-dum, ba-dum-ba. Come on, Drew.

47:50 Drew We are dating ourselves.

47:51 Caller Yeah, man.

47:51 Adam I know.

47:52 Caller You guys are too lost, man. We're not with you on that one, bro.

47:54 Adam All right, you guys, hey, you should cover it.

47:56 Caller All right.

47:57 Caller Done.

47:57 Adam All right, we're going to take ourselves a little break. Stroke 9 is here. I don't know if we're going to do a changing of the guard.

48:02 Caller Yeah, we're going to sub in.

48:04 Caller Tag team.

48:05 Caller The other guys.

48:06 Adam All right, we'll do that. We'll meet the rest of the band after this.

48:10 Caller Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191.

48:12 Caller Back in a minute.

48:13 Adam Well, it's worth hearing. All right, we're going to take a quick ten-second timeout. We'll be back with more of the show in just ten seconds.

49:09 Adam It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Luke and Eric have now filed in here, replacing John and Greg from Stroke 9. Stroke 9, by the way, will be at the Troubadour on the 25th. What is that, a week from today? Something like that?

49:28 Yeah, I think it's on Tuesday.

49:31 Adam And at the Galaxy on the 26th. And let's see, what else do I got here? That'll do it for the sheet I have in front of me. Oh boy, we got a bunch of other concert dates. I'll tell you what, I'll figure those out and I'll give them to you before the night is true. We'll get back on the phones. Donna?

49:51 Caller Hi.

49:52 Adam Hi.

49:52 Hi.

49:53 Caller I'm sorry, I'm a little cold right now. All right.

49:57 Drew We found out earlier tonight why that happens.

49:59 Adam Right. Oral sex.

50:01 Caller I'm standing outside of the store right now, so I'm a little cold. I have a question. Every time that I have sex with my boyfriend, it seems as though I have to tie him up and, I don't know, pour candle wax on him and punish him. But I always want to-

50:17 Adam Perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

50:20 Caller Of course, yes. But the thing is, I always want him to break free and punish me for punishing him.

50:26 Adam Right.

50:27 Caller And is that normal? Because it's almost the same time.

50:32 Adam They do that little sort of Gulliver's Travel scenario in the bedroom every once in a while.

50:37 Caller Not every once in a while, though. It's just about every time.

50:39 Drew It's a fetish. It's a fetish. And fetishes, once they surface, usually become a requisite in order to be able to function sexually. It's a way of distancing yourself from the intimacy. It's a way of tolerating that closeness and still allowing yourself to respond sexually to things.

50:57 Caller Sometimes I think that it's because sometimes during the day I'll make him mad or whatever. And I feel like I should be punished for that.

51:04 Drew No, no. It has to do with when you were growing up and people actually punished you for all kinds of things.

51:10 Caller I do know one reason for that, but I thought that it was long gone. I mean, this has been going on with my boyfriend for about six months. We've been together a year tomorrow, actually. My previous boyfriend was just, you know, all out abusive.

51:25 Drew I'm talking about when you were six years old, people used to...

51:27 Adam Before him.

51:27 Drew People used to whack you.

51:29 Adam How is it that this manifested itself this way and there was no history of this? I mean, there had to be something.

51:38 Caller Well, not that... Well, the only thing I can think of actually is when I was in Girl Scouts a long time ago, I was actually 11, there was a lifeguard which was the son of our troop leader and he was... somebody had, you know, some of the girls had been saying that they had been molested by him but he didn't really try anything on me. And that's the only thing I can think of.

52:03 Drew But nobody physically ever... No. Nobody ever...

52:06 Caller That's for the previous boyfriend.

52:07 Drew Wait, wait, wait. When you were growing up, nobody ever spanked you or anything like that?

52:10 Caller Not really.

52:11 Drew What is not really? You know, by the way, when everyone says, not really, watch what's behind you.

52:15 Caller All right.

52:15 Adam But on the other hand, someone gets spanked a couple of times growing up. It's not going to turn them into a deviant.

52:20 Drew What's not really?

52:22 Caller Well, no. My dad was... He drank every now and then. Not very... Not heavily.

52:27 Drew And when he would?

52:28 Caller When he would, he would just get angry. Not necessarily before me. I have two siblings, and he would, you know... It was basically, my mom would say, no, you guys go to your room, and I'll handle this myself. And we would just go off to bed, and they'd argue. And of course, my mom would always say, no, you're not going in there. They haven't done anything.

52:49 Drew Because before he went in, but in the past, he would go in and beat the kids up?

52:53 Caller He never beat us. It was just like, if he was drunk and we had something to drink.

52:59 Adam Hold on, Donna, if this was a court case, it wouldn't be looking good right now. You know what I mean? Nothing ever happened. Well, he drank a little, but not too much. Well, once in a while, when he got drunk, my mom had to convince him not to go in the room because he'd do damage to the kids.

53:18 Drew Yeah, Donna, there is no such thing as a child deserving. And no matter how egregious the child's behavior of anything like that.

53:28 Caller It would be like spanking and so on.

53:31 Adam I know, but this is the fact that your mom had to sort of, I mean, all right, let's say he did nothing, but still imagine you grow up in an environment where you hear your dad and your mom in the next room and your dad's had a few high balls, and he's saying, I'm going in there. And you're in your room, like under your coverage, your mom's going, don't go in there. I'll beat them. No, I got to do it myself. I mean, that's kind of...

53:53 Drew Listen, she was starting to tell us about the spankings, too.

53:55 Adam It's not the worst we've heard. All right. Come on, Donna, just admit he whipped you a little bit. Come on.

54:01 Caller No, I think that the last time that he did, I was probably in seventh grade.

54:06 Adam Seventh grade? You're 13 in seventh grade, aren't you?

54:09 Drew The point is, the fact that he ever did is what causes these kinds of fetishes, ever. Do you understand that?

54:15 Caller I guess.

54:16 Adam All right, well, listen, screw you. Deny everything and let your boyfriend beat the crap out of you for the rest of your life. Go to hell. I don't care. I'm done with all this, Drew. I'm done trying to convince people they're screwed up. You're calling the show, you're saying that you drip candle wax and your boyfriend's scrotum, you tie him up the phone cord, then he chews his way out and beats the crap out of you. This goes on every night. Maybe I've been a little bit naughty during the day. I think I might deserve it. Then we got to sit there and ring you like a bar rag to get just a drop of information out of you. But you kick and scream for every ounce of usable information and now it's screw you. Forget it. No, it had nothing to do with anything. You just got hooked up with the one boyfriend that beat the crap out of you. Magically, you got a new boyfriend that's beaten on you.

55:01 Drew Magically, I knew that her dad.

55:02 Adam Magically, Drew knew that dad may have done a little booze in and a little smack in himself but there's zero connection. It's just a big string of coincidences and there's no connection. So what have we learned? Nothing. You can never change. There's nothing to look into. None of you, I'm going to use some reverse psychology. Don't look into anything. You'll never change. I want you to stay exactly the way you are. Don't examine your past.

55:25 Drew Of course, even if they do.

55:26 Adam It has no bearing on your future.

55:27 Drew Even if they do examine, it doesn't mean they're going to change.

55:29 Adam That's true.

55:31 Drew Isabel.

55:31 Adam Isabel.

55:32 Yes.

55:32 Adam What's up? You're 19.

55:34 Caller Yes. Oh, Lord, I've got this dilemma. I do not know what to do. There's this guy that I work with and I also work with his girlfriend. She is the father of her one-year-old son. We all work together. We're all good friends.

55:52 Adam Your girlfriend is the father of her one-year-old son?

55:57 Caller Of one of my friend's son.

55:59 Adam She is?

56:01 Caller Yes.

56:01 Caller She's the father?

56:02 Caller He's her.

56:04 Adam Is she the son in the Holy Ghost too? How is it that she's the mother, right?

56:12 Caller Yes.

56:14 Adam Okay. Is she the typo?

56:16 Caller Today we're talking during work and he brought up a subject. I mean, it was all of a sudden. He just came, whispered into my ear, and he told me he wanted to have sex with me.

56:28 Drew Shocking. A male wanted to have sex with a female.

56:30 Caller Yes.

56:32 Drew Isabel, hold on. It must mean he's in love with you. What do you think, Adam?

56:35 Adam Oh, please.

56:35 Drew You think so?

56:36 Adam Stop being so sarcastic and jaded. I love every one of our callers to treat them all as if they were my own children.

56:44 Caller It's perfectly fine with me.

56:46 Adam Okay. So he wants to have sex with you.

56:48 Caller Yes. It's in a way it turned me on, but then it's like I wouldn't do it.

56:55 Adam Right.

56:56 Caller But then I don't know if I should let her know or if I should do it.

57:01 Adam Does she know he's a dog?

57:05 Caller Not that I know. From what I see, they seem happy to me.

57:08 Drew Well, let her put her on notice that he's not perhaps who she thinks he is.

57:12 Adam He has a two-year-old?

57:14 Caller One-year-old.

57:15 Drew With her?

57:16 Caller Yes.

57:16 Adam All right. How old is he?

57:18 Caller He is about around 20.

57:22 Adam Then she's how old?

57:24 Caller She's around the same.

57:25 Adam Yes. I will have her sterilized when I'm in power, by the way. I will look at her as a danger, a threat to society. All right. Where do you guys work?

57:35 Caller Where do we work? At a grocery store.

57:37 Adam Okay. You stay away from the food. You hear me? Just handle the canned goods. I won't trust you.

57:42 Caller Oh, well, that's what he handles.

57:43 Adam He handles canned goods?

57:45 Caller Yes.

57:45 Adam Good. Those cannot be contaminated. All right. Listen, Isabel, here's what's going to happen. I think you're going to have sex with this guy and he's going to get you pregnant too.

57:55 Caller Oh, Lord, no. I already have a son and I don't need another.

57:58 Adam There you go. You've now made my list, by the way, when I'm in power. All right. Come on. Where's his father?

58:07 Caller My son's father.

58:07 Adam He's in produce?

58:09 Caller No. Actually, he has no job and he's just going to school.

58:14 Adam Perfect. High school?

58:17 Caller No. College.

58:18 Adam Okay.

58:18 Drew College?

58:19 Adam Junior college.

58:20 Caller Yes.

58:20 Adam Really, college should not be in the term junior college. It just be called junior. It's not fair. Listen, I never went to college, but if I did, I'd be pissed at people who went to school junior college because I don't like all the work I've done to get into college and they get college in their title too? Please. It's unfair. All right. Do not have sex with this guy. He's a troublemaker. He's already, you know he's an idiot because he's your best friend's, I don't know, old man, boyfriend, and he wants to have sex with you.

58:51 Drew Put her on notice that you believe him to be a bad guy.

58:54 Adam She's going to get pregnant again. Asshole. Thank you, Drew. Oh boy. Oh boy. What guys get away with these days? Oh, I wish I was a guy. Kelly.

59:04 Yeah.

59:05 Adam You're 15?

59:06 Caller Yeah. Hello.

59:09 Adam We're here. You just won the lottery. Is that what you're calling?

59:12 Caller No. No. Dr. Drew, you're really, really hot. He's what?

59:18 Adam I don't want you to say that.

59:19 Drew Well, thank you, Kelly. What's going on?

59:20 Adam What kind of hot is he?

59:23 Caller He's, like, really, really hot.

59:25 Adam Oh, really, really hot. Yeah.

59:27 Caller Yeah, I know.

59:28 Caller Okay.

59:29 Adam I got to sit here and hold myself back every night.

59:31 Drew We're going to do it someday.

59:33 Adam One day.

59:34 Caller Okay. My friend's three months pregnant, and she, like, can't afford out. I don't think she can afford the baby, because, like, she's, like, kind of moving off welfare.

59:48 Drew How old is she? Where's her family?

59:53 Caller Well, her dad, like, I don't know. He's, like, I don't know. Like, he's not there.

1:00:01 Drew He's an idiot.

1:00:03 Caller She doesn't, like, talk to him or anything.

1:00:05 Adam What would you like us to do?

1:00:07 Caller Huh? Like, I didn't want to know what I should tell her, like, what she should do with it, because she was, like...

1:00:13 Drew How about adoption?

1:00:16 Caller Well, if she doesn't do that, then what should I tell her to do with it?

1:00:20 Adam Well, should we just keep going and you can keep eliminating options?

1:00:24 Drew There's nothing else other than her raising the child.

1:00:26 Adam Well, she can have an abortion, she can give the child up for adoption, or she can raise it. Actually, she won't raise it. I'll raise it. All the goddamn tax money I spend.

1:00:37 Caller Oh.

1:00:37 Adam Okay. Make sure to tell her that.

1:00:39 Caller Okay.

1:00:40 Drew Adoption.

1:00:41 Adam How far along is she?

1:00:43 Caller She's three months.

1:00:44 Drew All right. So she's got to see it through now.

1:00:47 Adam She does? She's going to have an abortion. That's no problem. She's 17. She'll bounce right back.

1:00:54 Drew It's not about her.

1:00:55 Adam Hey, Kelly. Who's it about?

1:00:57 Drew It's about pulling those little arms and legs out.

1:00:59 Adam Oh, true. Don't turn an abortion into a bad thing. Kelly?

1:01:06 Caller Yeah.

1:01:06 Adam Okay. Are you good friends with her?

1:01:09 Caller Yeah, really.

1:01:09 Adam Okay. You're not going to get pregnant, right?

1:01:12 Caller No.

1:01:13 Adam No? You have a boyfriend?

1:01:15 Caller No.

1:01:16 Adam Good. You ever had sex?

1:01:19 Caller No.

1:01:19 Adam All right. Well, that's very good. See if you... I want to personally see your Hymen intact in five years. You understand? I'm marking it down on my calendar. Hold on. Let me write it in. See? Meet with... I'm penning it in. Meet with Kelly's Hymen.

1:01:35 Drew January 17th.

1:01:35 Adam Can you call us? January 17th, 2005. All right, Kelly. Ask her... See if you can get her to give the child up for abortion. I mean, sorry, up for adoption. They really shouldn't sound so much alike, those two words. They're very different. All right?

1:01:51 Drew I think that's a very noble thing to do.

1:01:53 Adam Best for the kid, best for her, best for society, best for the neighborhood, best for everyone. I really wish more people would do that. We talk to people night after night. They're like... They don't believe in abortion. They don't want to give their kid up for adoption because it's them. But they're 16 and they're living in a dumpster. And it's like, come on, how selfish can you get? I mean, you really love the kid so much. And if you did, wouldn't you want the kid to be raised by someone where there was a father, where there was some income, where there was some possibility of a future for the kid instead of just sort of repeating the cycle? Yeah. It really, it's the only problem we have in this society, as far as I can tell. I mean, all the other stuff, unemployment, prison, overcrowding, and all that kind of whatever it is, whatever crime, whatever violent crime, whatever it is, whatever other problems we're supposed to have as a society, they all stem from this problem because you do the math. I mean, you look at you guys, your parents loved you, they took care of you, you're fine. You pay your taxes, you don't hold anyone up at the ATM, you're not out robbing people, you're not a problem. I mean, you're one of the good ones. Drew, do we have to worry about Drew's triplets, do we? No, no, we don't. One of them may go gay, I don't know. But the other two, we're going to go on and lead productive lives, and so will the gay one too. Drew, I want you to know that.

1:03:27 Caller Of course.

1:03:27 Adam That's why you should accept him, and not shun him like you've said. Courtney?

1:03:32 Caller Yeah?

1:03:32 Adam You're 18.

1:03:33 Caller Yeah.

1:03:34 Adam What's up?

1:03:36 Stroke 9 My boyfriend has given me two diseases now, chlamydia and herpes.

1:03:43 Drew Two at the same time or in sequence?

1:03:46 Stroke 9 The first time was, he only gave me chlamydia once, and I went to go get on birth control, and then I found out that I had it because I did the whole P test, and then a couple of months later I got herpes from him.

1:04:00 Drew Great. Quite a guy.

1:04:02 Adam Yeah. Well, I should have got like cancer and down syndrome or something.

1:04:06 Drew You should know that two STDs really increases the risk for HIV and whatnot.

1:04:11 Adam It does?

1:04:12 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:04:13 Adam What do you mean? Why?

1:04:14 Drew If you had, it's just the way the data falls out.

1:04:18 Adam How does that work?

1:04:22 Drew You have to be in some risk situations in order to get two STDs.

1:04:26 Adam Well, you have to be if the guy has really been around.

1:04:31 Drew There you go. That's a risk situation.

1:04:32 Adam But it's not like because you have the two, you're more likely to get the third.

1:04:36 Drew No, it's not a causation. It's just an association.

1:04:39 Adam So did, yeah.

1:04:41 Stroke 9 I've been tested for HIV.

1:04:42 Caller I don't have it as far as I know.

1:04:44 Drew So you've been treated for the chlamydia?

1:04:46 Stroke 9 Yeah. I got that done as soon as I found out I had it.

1:04:49 Drew And the herpes, is that under control okay?

1:04:52 Stroke 9 Yeah. I only have one outbreak so far.

1:04:56 Drew I bet there are warts too. Have you checked for that? Have you checked for warts?

1:05:01 Stroke 9 Yeah. I've gotten, the rest of it's fine.

1:05:04 Adam What do you want to do with your boyfriend?

1:05:06 Stroke 9 I don't know. I keep on getting bladder infections from him. It's really weird.

1:05:13 Adam What kind of infections?

1:05:14 Drew Bladder.

1:05:15 Adam Oh, bladder. Well, all guys give those.

1:05:17 Stroke 9 No, I get them.

1:05:19 Drew We understand that.

1:05:21 Stroke 9 I don't know.

1:05:21 Drew Why do you want to keep this guy?

1:05:22 Adam The world's dumbest scholars. I'll put our callers against any show scholars.

1:05:27 Drew Do not say, I love him.

1:05:29 Stroke 9 I do.

1:05:30 Caller Oh, boy.

1:05:31 Adam How old is he?

1:05:32 Drew 30? 28?

1:05:33 Stroke 9 He's 20.

1:05:35 Adam 20? What's he do? Work construction or go to junior college?

1:05:39 Stroke 9 He's got a good career.

1:05:41 Adam Yeah. Welding?

1:05:43 Stroke 9 No.

1:05:44 Adam Come on. What's he do?

1:05:47 Stroke 9 He's a diesel mechanic.

1:05:50 Adam Diesel mechanic. There you go. That is a rocket sled to the top, that diesel mechanic. Yeah, before you know it, you're working on celebrity diesel engines. And then it's all gravy, that diesel mechanic. Come on, please. This guy's white trash. He's albino trash. He's even whiter than white trash.

1:06:15 Caller No.

1:06:16 Adam Come on. Let me see if I can... Does this guy wear like a baseball camp where the bill is bent around so it's almost a full circle? Is he one of those guys?

1:06:26 Caller Yeah.

1:06:27 Adam He does, huh? Is it the bill, the baseball camp? It's like, here's the deal. The whiter the trash you are, the more bend you get in your bill. Here's the whole thing about, you know, black guys wear the hat their own way. White trash got their own thing. But the dumber you are, the more effed up your hat is.

1:06:47 Drew The more of a tube the bill becomes.

1:06:49 Adam Yeah, the bill becomes either a tube or it's the kind of hat that looks like someone just set it on you. Like they lowered it down and it's just resting on your head. You're not actually wearing it as much as it's on you. It's like a coaster. You see those like white trash guys where things just, it's just sitting up there. You wonder why they're wearing it. It doesn't look like it's on. But that front starts curling. Like, you know, some people can curl their tongue like a tube. That's what happens to white trash guys. I don't know what it is, but I think like each year it moves an eighth of an inch, quarter inch, you know. When he was in high school, it probably just had a little bend in it. Now that he's 20, it's going to overlap soon. All right. I don't know. Don't get, okay, where is she? What is she on, 8? 13? Courtney.

1:07:35 Stroke 9 Yeah.

1:07:36 Adam Don't get pregnant, you goofball.

1:07:38 Stroke 9 I'm trying not to.

1:07:39 Drew How are you doing that?

1:07:41 Stroke 9 I'm, oh.

1:07:42 Adam Pulling out, right?

1:07:44 Stroke 9 Oh, I was on birth control for a while.

1:07:46 Adam Oh, okay. Well, as long as you're on it at one time.

1:07:49 Stroke 9 Well, no. Quit being sarcastic.

1:07:51 Adam I can't help it.

1:07:52 Drew Why don't you continue?

1:07:54 Stroke 9 Huh?

1:07:54 Drew Why don't you continue birth control?

1:07:56 Stroke 9 I just, I, after I got real sick, I just kind of decided that I wasn't going to have sex anymore.

1:08:01 Drew And what is, oh, was sick with.

1:08:02 Adam All right. Did you stop having sex?

1:08:05 Stroke 9 No. I know.

1:08:07 Adam All right, come on.

1:08:08 Drew And what did you get sick with?

1:08:09 Stroke 9 With the herpes after I had my outbreak. It's like it totally made me not want to have sex anymore.

1:08:14 Drew All right. Well, you're doing it, so you better get back on the pill.

1:08:16 Adam Courtney, do not let this guy get you pregnant.

1:08:20 Stroke 9 I'm trying not to.

1:08:21 Drew You're not trying not to. You were trying not to.

1:08:24 Adam You dodging his sperm is not trying not to get pregnant. You understand?

1:08:31 Stroke 9 But I've done a lot to get, I mean, I've moved from a different state for this guy after knowing him for three weeks.

1:08:37 Drew Oh, boy. Want to do some gambling here?

1:08:39 Adam Yeah. Hold on a second. You guys got money? We got to gamble. There's something going on here with Courtney. Moved to a different state, three weeks. All right. Now, here's how this gambling works. We gamble on the past, not on the present or the future. We want to know what kind of environment she came from. Now, you can gamble and say parents loved her. No problem. You can go with alcoholic dad, you can go with sexual abuse, whatever you like. You guys got money? Yeah.

1:09:12 Caller I got money, I think.

1:09:14 Adam Just a buckle, dude.

1:09:15 Caller Did we get our per diems today?

1:09:18 Drew I got to say, I know there's something over there, but I do not have a clear read on it.

1:09:21 Adam I may go a different angle here.

1:09:23 Caller This is what I've got. You guys got-

1:09:24 Adam I got my own angle here. I got a dollar. I got five. What do you got? You got a dollar? Yeah. Is that it? Just one? Two of you? What do you got?

1:09:31 Caller Guitar pick?

1:09:32 Adam A stub from Burbank Airport?

1:09:35 Caller Yeah.

1:09:35 Adam That's got to be worth something.

1:09:36 Caller That's worth something somewhere.

1:09:37 Adam I'm sure I can cash it in.

1:09:41 Caller You can go get my bag.

1:09:42 Adam Listen, if you guys turn to the Beatles one day, I think I can get something for that. Why don't you sign that? Yeah.

1:09:47 Caller Let me sign that real quick. You can put it on eBay tonight actually.

1:09:50 Adam Well, I'm going to hang on to it and hope that things work out. All right. Not that they're not working out, but I mean work out. All right. I'm going to go first. Oh, this is tough. I'm going to go with Fatton High School. All right.

1:10:07 Drew Reasonable.

1:10:08 Adam Yeah. It's a hunch. Knew him for three weeks and came out there. That's the move of a big gal. You know what I'm saying?

1:10:15 Drew Oh, yeah, yeah.

1:10:17 Adam On that hand, out early, I mean on her own early, got to be a lot of chaos at home. Stepdad doing something. You know what I'm saying? What do you think, Eric?

1:10:27 Caller I kind of think the alcoholic dad, you know.

1:10:29 Drew That's a reasonable bet. That's a good bet.

1:10:31 Adam Very safe. Almost too easy.

1:10:32 Caller That is.

1:10:33 Adam What was his drink?

1:10:34 Caller Who didn't have one?

1:10:36 Caller Jim Beam.

1:10:36 Adam Jim Beam, okay.

1:10:38 Caller I'm going to go with dropped on her head.

1:10:40 Adam Safe.

1:10:41 Caller Yeah, as an infant.

1:10:43 Adam Dropped. She won't remember that, though.

1:10:45 Caller She won't remember, but she'll probably say they loved her.

1:10:47 Adam Well, let me say, you're not going to win any money if she doesn't remember.

1:10:52 Drew I've got the chaos, but I'm cutting my own path. I'm totally independent from my parents. So I'm getting the opposite of what she's presenting. Maybe wealthy parents over intrusive, but she wouldn't perceive it that way. Large family, let's see what happens.

1:11:09 Adam Large family who are semi well to do. Luke, come on. Not dropped on the head.

1:11:15 Caller That's not going to work. I disagree with you, because I mean she's going out with a diesel engine.

1:11:21 Drew Yeah, but this is her rebelling.

1:11:23 Adam No, no, no. Let Luke venture a guess.

1:11:29 Caller Gosh, I think that she is.

1:11:34 Adam Someone's got to go with molested.

1:11:35 Drew Yeah.

1:11:36 Adam You want to go with molested, rape? Come on.

1:11:39 Caller I don't think raped.

1:11:40 Adam Molested.

1:11:41 Caller Yeah, probably molested.

1:11:41 Drew I think it's worse to get a person.

1:11:43 Adam Dad? I'm going molested. I think there's a stepdad in here somewhere.

1:11:48 Drew Yeah, Adam, where does she have to find that? Travel States, 18. This guy doesn't have the funds.

1:11:53 Adam Just quiet down.

1:11:53 Drew Greyhound.

1:11:54 Adam Colombo. Courtney?

1:11:56 Caller Yeah.

1:11:56 Adam Okay, now what's up?

1:11:58 Stroke 9 I wasn't sat in high school.

1:12:00 Adam Son of a bitch.

1:12:02 Stroke 9 I was raped when I was 15.

1:12:03 Adam You were raped at 15?

1:12:05 Stroke 9 Raped at 15. It's not a stepmom. I've got a stepdad, or I've got a stepmom, not a stepdad. Okay, she was abusive.

1:12:13 Adam She was abusive?

1:12:14 Drew Physically abusive.

1:12:15 Stroke 9 Physically, yes, very.

1:12:17 Adam And what happened before 15?

1:12:19 Drew The physical abusive mom.

1:12:21 Adam Physical abusive stepmom?

1:12:22 Stroke 9 Ever since I was in third grade, she...

1:12:24 Adam That'll do it. Where's real mom?

1:12:27 Stroke 9 I don't know. I haven't known her since I was three.

1:12:29 Adam Haven't known her. And dad must not have been much of a prize.

1:12:35 Stroke 9 I have a good father.

1:12:36 Adam Yeah, but good fathers don't bring home physical abusive stepmoms and then let them have their way with their kids.

1:12:42 Caller Yeah.

1:12:43 Adam You know what I mean?

1:12:44 Caller Yeah.

1:12:44 Drew Was he working all the time?

1:12:46 Stroke 9 Do I work?

1:12:47 Drew Was he working all the time?

1:12:48 Stroke 9 My dad?

1:12:49 Drew Yeah.

1:12:51 Stroke 9 Now he does. He didn't back then. Before he was a manager at a grocery store.

1:12:55 Adam Drew's out. Yeah, that whole Drew, that was the worst guess I've ever heard in my life.

1:13:00 Drew I couldn't get a read on her.

1:13:02 Adam Come on. How tall are you?

1:13:04 Caller Six foot.

1:13:05 Adam Six foot?

1:13:06 Caller Yeah.

1:13:08 Adam How much you weigh?

1:13:10 Caller 150.

1:13:11 Adam Wow.

1:13:11 Drew That's about right.

1:13:12 Adam That's a lot of woman. Jesus. And you weren't big in high school?

1:13:17 Stroke 9 No.

1:13:17 Drew How did you get the funds to follow this guy across states?

1:13:19 Stroke 9 I modeled in high school.

1:13:21 Adam Oh, man. I'm humiliated.

1:13:23 Drew How did you get the funds to go across states?

1:13:28 Stroke 9 Well, first it was Greyhound.

1:13:31 Adam All right. And Drew, you're really, you're parking at the wrong place.

1:13:33 Drew I'm just curious. No, no, I'm curious.

1:13:35 Adam I'm out.

1:13:36 Drew Hey, I'm out.

1:13:37 Adam Six-foot chicken hitchhiking. She can get to San Francisco before you could get there from Burbank. She really could. You know what I mean? All right.

1:13:45 Drew Wait, wait, wait. I think she's got something to tell us. How did you get funds?

1:13:48 Stroke 9 Well, I got, my dad was going to pay for the, my dad did pay for the plane ticket for me to get over here.

1:13:56 Adam He just to go hang with the diesel mechanic?

1:13:59 Stroke 9 Yeah.

1:14:00 Adam Oh, boy. All right. Hey, Courtney?

1:14:04 Stroke 9 Yeah.

1:14:05 Adam So wait a minute. Did your dad do any drinking?

1:14:07 Caller He used to.

1:14:08 Adam Yeah. When did he quit?

1:14:11 Stroke 9 When I was probably 12.

1:14:13 Adam 12. All right. So dad was an alcoholic.

1:14:15 Caller Daddy drank.

1:14:17 Stroke 9 He drank like a 12 pack a day.

1:14:19 Adam 12 pack.

1:14:19 Caller He drank for the government.

1:14:20 Adam 12 pack of Jim Beam?

1:14:22 Stroke 9 No.

1:14:23 Adam But he drank. He did some drinking. Stepmom was abusive. Who raped you when you were 15?

1:14:29 Stroke 9 This guy that's in the Air Force now.

1:14:31 Adam OK. Thank God we have him protecting the country. And was he a boyfriend or something?

1:14:37 Stroke 9 No. He was just an acquaintance.

1:14:39 Adam No. And no sexual abuse before that?

1:14:43 Stroke 9 Not that I know of. I mean, my stepmom told me that my dad was taking to court for physically abuse, like molestation, child molestation for me and my little sister.

1:14:56 Drew What the hell are you talking about now? Come on.

1:14:59 Adam Wouldn't that count as something?

1:15:02 Stroke 9 I don't know if it's true or not.

1:15:04 Drew Well, we guess it is.

1:15:06 Adam I'm going, yeah.

1:15:07 Drew Yeah, based on your behavior now.

1:15:08 Adam I can tell it in your voice.

1:15:10 Drew Based on your behavior now, we'd say it probably was true.

1:15:13 Adam All right, Courtney.

1:15:14 Drew Did he go to jail?

1:15:15 Adam No. No. Courtney, listen to me. See if you can read a book, see if you can get a little counseling. Please, please, please don't get pregnant, and don't get married for a while. All right? All right. She's going to be married and she's going to be pregnant in three months. All right, we got to take ourselves a little break. It looks like Eric won that. He won the alcoholic dance. It was sort of by default, though. We all came up pretty short.

1:15:43 Caller Well, you came up with my answer for me, so I wouldn't have won anyway. You would have, you know.

1:15:47 Adam Yeah, no, no, that's fine.

1:15:48 Caller I can't take your money, man.

1:15:50 Adam No, no, that's before the wedding.

1:15:52 Caller You owe me those three bucks, man.

1:15:53 Adam I do?

1:15:53 Caller Yeah, okay.

1:15:54 Adam Well, we're going to take a little break. Stroke 9 is here and we'll be back after this. It's the Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that's Dr. Drew. David Arquette is gonna be in here tomorrow night, then Unwritten Law will be in here, and then Long Beach Dub All Stars, and oh, we got a Snoop Dogg coming in here next week.

1:16:55 Caller Dog pound.

1:16:56 Adam So that ought to be good. Stroke 9 here tonight. Nasty Little Thoughts is the name of the current CD, and I think what we're gonna do is hear something else off of that CD. This one is called Letters. These letters from Stroke 9, and Nasty Little Thoughts is the name of that CD. Very, very nice soundings. I was just telling the band, although I must think I say that to every band. Merci beaucoup. But it's true, Drew, if we're not really into a band, we just don't say anything, right?

1:21:18 Drew No, you start attacking them sometimes. I think a Chumbawamba.

1:21:23 Adam On the air? Yeah. Unacceptable. Well, the Chumbawamba idiots are up here talking about the anarchy, and it just drives me nuts. I think people should steal our records. Right. Who should fly the airplane that you guys are taking back to England? Anybody who wants to. We should all take turns. Nobody should have to pick up garbage if they don't want to. All right. So let me get this straight. Your plan is we all just work when we want to work, if we want to work and then take as much as we need from the stores? Yes. Because the man, the corporations, the conglomerations are holding us. It's like, oh, shut up, you idiots. You have no plan, you tards. It drives me nuts. Really, what do you think would happen if I just said, listen, Monday you collect garbage if you want. Tuesday, you're an air traffic controller if you're feeling up to it. Let's see how long things would get along. When you get gas, take as much as you need, but don't take any more. Put the handle, make sure and put the squeegee back and then change the water, too. What do you think would happen? I mean, listen, the power goes out for 10 minutes, there's looting. I mean, the second the power goes out, people just run down the street and start grabbing TVs out of store windows. What do you think would happen if everyone's just sort of on the honor system? Listen, everyone, the system is the way it is because that's the way it's worked out. It's not because the man came in and decided we're going to keep this guy over here and we'll keep that guy over there. We'll keep all the poor people down. We'll decide in advance who's going to be poor, and then we'll keep them down, and we'll decide in advance who's going to be rich. No, it's just the system is the way it is. I was poor, now I have money. Nobody told me, no one held me anywhere or forced me anywhere. That's it.

1:23:13 Caller It's pretty amazing that it works as well as it does.

1:23:16 Adam You just can't argue with it. It's like when people go, it's like when people, when women bitch about, oh, why are guys in power? I mean, who put guys in power? It's like, hey, what are you arguing with? This is it. They're like, well, why aren't women in power? Well, why aren't you? What was the plan? Who did it? Don't you think you would be? I mean, if you were smarter and better and more powerful, don't you think you'd be running things or did somehow we hold you down?

1:23:43 Drew We are somewhat dependent on our history. I mean, things change generationally.

1:23:48 Adam How do things get the way they are? How did they get this way?

1:23:51 Drew All right, here we go. Take a call.

1:23:52 Adam How did they get this way?

1:23:53 Drew No, I understand.

1:23:55 Adam Ann?

1:23:56 Yeah?

1:23:56 Adam You're 28.

1:23:57 Caller I am 28.

1:23:59 Adam Go ahead.

1:24:00 Caller Okay, go ahead.

1:24:01 Drew Yeah.

1:24:01 Caller Okay, because we seriously need to talk about your limitations of emotional development.

1:24:06 Drew All right.

1:24:07 Caller You're absolutely zero. I don't know who you're getting advice from about monogamy, but it sounds like Bill Clinton. Poor Rick calls in and tells you about his girlfriend, who slept with her boss to get a job.

1:24:21 Adam No.

1:24:22 Drew No, I got the story.

1:24:23 Adam Not to get a job, who slept with her boss.

1:24:25 Caller And she gets the job.

1:24:27 Adam She said she slept with her boss before.

1:24:30 Drew She had a relationship and then happened to get a job, and it was weird.

1:24:33 Adam And then it was worked for.

1:24:35 Caller And you don't think they're still sleeping together, and you're calling this kid an idiot?

1:24:39 Caller You're the idiot.

1:24:40 Caller Those two are sleeping together every 15 minutes.

1:24:43 Drew Put it on hold for a second. Shut up, Adam! Just for a second.

1:24:46 Caller When you work with someone...

1:24:47 Drew Hold on. Hold on one second. Just one second, Adam.

1:24:49 Adam Hold on a second. All right?

1:24:51 Drew Just one second.

1:24:52 Adam Chew some taffy or something, would you, honey?

1:24:54 Drew Magically. First of all, we have to take a break. But magically, do you think there's a little history here of her having to work?

1:25:00 Caller No way.

1:25:02 Adam All right. Now, she's not going to make it. Hold on a second. What?

1:25:07 Caller You must be a homosexual because-

1:25:09 Adam Listen, just because you take in the ass once in a while does not make you gay. I've been saying that for years.

1:25:13 Caller Two hands off me, Adam.

1:25:15 Drew You're gay.

1:25:15 Adam I thought that was true.

1:25:16 Caller Relationships with a woman?

1:25:18 Adam Listen. Listen, screwball. Listen to me. Listen to me.

1:25:23 Caller This crazy man on the radio who's giving these poor kids advice-

1:25:26 Adam Poor kids. The guy was 26, wasn't he?

1:25:30 Caller Yeah, he was.

1:25:31 Adam The guy was 26 years old.

1:25:32 Caller He was a grown man.

1:25:33 Adam Here's the situation, and I will present it. Listen, Miss Past History. Listen to me. I'm going to present it exactly how he presented it to me. He's 26 years old. He has a girlfriend. She had a relationship with a guy. Then it turned out she was working with the guy for the guy. But to the best of his knowledge, she did not have sex with him after she began dating the guy who called in.

1:25:57 Caller She's going to turn around and tell him that she is? She's with this man that she slept with every single day for eight, let's say eight hours a day. And co-workers become your compenants. And if there's any kind of sexual attraction, it's going to happen again. Why?

1:26:16 Adam Listen, people break up and work together all the time.

1:26:20 Caller Break up and work together all the time? That's fine. But those two are having sex together. And this guy needs to move on.

1:26:26 Adam What do you mean, that's fine but not for these two?

1:26:30 Drew That's your magical interpretation.

1:26:31 Adam How do you know?

1:26:32 Caller Do you work in the office too?

1:26:33 Caller Because I know.

1:26:34 Adam All right. Well, what is up with you?

1:26:36 Caller I know.

1:26:37 Drew You've been there before. Magical.

1:26:39 Adam Why? What happened to you?

1:26:40 Caller What happened to me?

1:26:41 Drew Yeah.

1:26:42 Adam Yes. Why do you know so much?

1:26:44 Caller Why do I know so much? Because I'm educated.

1:26:47 Drew No. What happened in the workplace to you?

1:26:48 Caller I didn't get my education from Dan Quayle. It seems you have.

1:26:52 Drew What happened in the workplace to you?

1:26:53 Caller What happened in the workplace with me? I worked with a man for a year and a half. I ended up sleeping together because we were with each other all the time.

1:27:03 Drew It was a bad experience.

1:27:05 Caller No, it wasn't. It was a great experience.

1:27:06 Drew Was he married or something?

1:27:08 Caller It doesn't matter.

1:27:08 Drew Was he married? He was. That doesn't matter. I'm asking a question. I don't care if it matters.

1:27:12 Caller He was.

1:27:14 Drew He was married. Say the words. Bingo. So that's the whole thing.

1:27:18 Adam All right. So he was married and did he divorce his wife to be with you?

1:27:22 Drew No.

1:27:22 Caller Did I want to divorce his wife to be with you?

1:27:24 Adam Did he divorce his wife to be with you?

1:27:27 Caller No. It was a comfortable situation. I'm working.

1:27:30 Adam Oh, really? You really sound like you're over it.

1:27:32 Caller No. I'm not over your advice that you gave to this poor kid, Rick. You called him names. You told him he was acting like a 16-year-old. And meanwhile, his girlfriend is sleeping with the boss.

1:27:44 Adam Now, first off, we asked him a couple of times. He has no evidence to support that whatsoever. He does not think they're sleeping together.

1:27:53 Caller What kind of evidence is he going to have? He doesn't work there.

1:27:56 Adam Do you think a woman is capable of ending a relationship and then having contact with the man she entered the relationship with without having sex with him?

1:28:04 Drew Men and women should not mix in the workplace. Period. That's it. That's it. They have to be separate in the workplace at all times, or else there will be sex. Especially married people.

1:28:12 Adam How long did you go out with this married guy? How long did you date him? How long and why didn't he get divorced? I know he promised you he would. He promised you he was going to divorce his wife and he never did, didn't he?

1:28:27 Caller I didn't want him to divorce his wife.

1:28:29 Adam You wanted to be with him.

1:28:30 Caller Oh, please I did not.

1:28:31 Adam Why were you boning him?

1:28:33 Caller I think she still wants to be with him. Of course.

1:28:34 Caller Oh, I do not. I have a wonderful boyfriend right now.

1:28:37 Adam Why were you sleeping with him if you didn't want to be with him?

1:28:39 Caller He was really great in bed and...

1:28:41 Adam How did you know in advance?

1:28:42 Caller How did I know in advance? I didn't know in advance.

1:28:45 Adam And you have this horrible habit of repeating the question. Just answer the question. How long did you have an affair with this married man? Answer the question. How long did you have an affair with him?

1:28:57 Caller A year and a half.

1:28:58 Adam A year and a half. And in that year and a half, you had no expectations, no wishes, no desires that he break it off of his wife and be with you. Please, you just had casual sex for a year and a half with the man you worked with.

1:29:12 Caller I didn't consider it casual sex.

1:29:14 Adam You had intimate sex with the man you worked with and saw every day.

1:29:18 Caller Yeah.

1:29:18 Adam And had no feelings for him.

1:29:20 Caller Then you knew he was married.

1:29:21 Caller I didn't have any feelings for him. I had plenty of feelings for him.

1:29:24 Adam Plenty of feelings, but not enough feelings to want to be with him?

1:29:27 Caller To be married to him?

1:29:28 Adam Just to be with him, just to have him free and clear and be able to be with you.

1:29:32 Caller I worked with him seven days a week. I worked with him every day.

1:29:34 Adam But yet he never divorced his wife, did he?

1:29:37 Caller Pardon me?

1:29:38 Adam He never divorced his wife, did he? No.

1:29:40 Caller I never asked him.

1:29:41 Adam Oh, but you wanted him to. Man, did you want him to.

1:29:44 Caller That's not why I called up.

1:29:45 Adam All right. Bye-bye. Remember I was telling you guys during the commercial, nobody has any complaints unless they've been through the same experience themselves, and then they twist it around and thrust it on you. That was amazing. That's the only, and this is by the way, why whether it's our show or any show, I don't listen to people who complain because it always means they had a similar experience that they're now regurgitating and thrusting in the lap of whoever's trying to have their own experience. Right. Yeah. Thank you very much. So year and a half, listen everybody, year and a half of having a sexual affair with an employer.

1:30:20 Drew Profoundly involved and profoundly damaged by it, hurt.

1:30:22 Adam Yeah.

1:30:23 Drew A married employer.

1:30:23 Adam And she prayed every day that this guy broke up. He never did. He screwed her over. I'm sure he told her a thousand times. He was on the ounce with his wife, never happened, crushed her, and she saw herself in that collar in the first hour.

1:30:38 Drew There you go.

1:30:40 Caller All right, see?

1:30:40 Adam There's a logical answer to everything. We'll be back.

1:30:43 Caller Let's have some more fun.

1:30:45 Caller Okay, let's do it.

1:30:47 Caller Call Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:30:51 Caller Loveline will be right back.

1:31:26 Caller Yeah, it's Loveline.

1:31:28 Adam Luke and Eric here from Stroke 9. David Arquette will be in here to get me in a headlock and beat on me tomorrow night, by the way. And now we're looking forward to David Arquette coming in here because he's a barrel of laughs, that guy. Very nice guy. And we'll have a fun time reenacting him coming in the studio. When I was making fun of him. Andrea?

1:31:52 Caller Hey, I just wanted to call up and say hi to Stroke 9, and I totally love you guys.

1:31:57 Adam Well, hello there.

1:31:58 Caller Thanks, Andrea.

1:31:58 Caller Hi, and I'm going to see you at the Fillmore on Saturday. And I was just wondering, how did you meet and start up as a band?

1:32:06 Caller I think we covered that earlier, but we can...

1:32:07 Caller Oh, sorry.

1:32:08 Caller That's all right. We can cover it again briefly. We met in high school in a class called Rock Band. And it sounds like a joke, but it's really the truth. And we just started making music together and decided that we really liked each other and like making music and like being friends. And we just kind of continued doing that for the last 10 plus years.

1:32:33 Adam Eric, did you join more recently?

1:32:35 Caller Yeah, I joined about three years ago. I'm from New York originally. So I moved out to San Francisco like six years ago.

1:32:43 Adam Yeah, that's when you met up? Yeah. But you didn't go to hippie school where you got to go to rock band and stuff.

1:32:48 Caller No, I wish I did though.

1:32:49 Adam Yeah, me too.

1:32:50 Caller Sounds like fun.

1:32:51 Adam It's like, I want to take rock band, we have metal shop. I really prefer to take rock band. Listen, son. It was part of rock band. We got metal shop, maybe plastics next semester. No rock band? No. No interpretive dance?

1:33:07 Caller No.

1:33:08 Adam All right, Andrea, they met in rock band.

1:33:10 Caller Okay, thank you.

1:33:11 Caller Thanks, Andrea. I will see you at the Fillmore.

1:33:13 Caller Okay, bye.

1:33:13 Caller All right.

1:33:14 Adam All right, and a lot of people don't know that some of the other bands, Judas Priest and Fog Hat, both came out of that same rock band class. Not the same year, of course. Fog Hat was class of 76, I think. Oh no, maybe earlier, like 72. That's right. All right, where the hell was we? Ryan?

1:33:37 Caller Yeah.

1:33:38 Adam You're 17?

1:33:39 Caller Yeah.

1:33:39 Adam You hooked up with a girl at church?

1:33:42 Caller Yeah.

1:33:43 Adam Right on dude.

1:33:45 Caller Yeah, but I don't know, I felt weird because she's from far away. She lives in Huntington Park.

1:33:53 Adam Huntington Park, right?

1:33:54 Caller Yeah, and I live in Wilmington.

1:33:56 Adam Well, yeah, that's a lifetime away.

1:33:58 Drew How did you happen to be in the same church?

1:34:01 Caller Well, I don't know. My parents just started going over there.

1:34:04 Drew Huntington Park.

1:34:04 Caller And I just followed.

1:34:07 Adam Okay.

1:34:07 Caller Yeah, but she's 12 and I'm 17.

1:34:12 Adam Perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

1:34:14 Drew Did you know she was 12?

1:34:16 Caller No, not until after.

1:34:18 Caller After what?

1:34:19 Caller After we were macking.

1:34:21 Drew You were macking.

1:34:21 Adam They were making out?

1:34:22 Caller Yeah.

1:34:23 Adam Right, they were macking. And you met her in church, and where did you mack with her?

1:34:29 Caller Oh, it was after church. We went to like a church party or something.

1:34:34 Drew I thought it was in church. Stop, she's 12. Don't want to take, just forget.

1:34:37 Adam What do you want to know?

1:34:38 Caller What is macking, exactly? Should we ask her, or is it?

1:34:41 Adam Making out.

1:34:42 Caller Just making out.

1:34:42 Drew She's two cities away. Stop. She's 12.

1:34:45 Caller Just making out, but like...

1:34:46 Adam Yeah, Brian, what do you want to know? She's 12. That's enough.

1:34:48 Caller Light petting? Heavy petting?

1:34:49 Adam Huh? Listen, screwball, she's 12. You're 17.

1:34:53 Drew That's it.

1:34:54 Caller Stop it. It's over.

1:34:55 Drew Stop that.

1:34:56 Adam You know what's funny? Guys get a lot of punting in church, but nobody gets laid at temple. You never hear any Jewish guys calling, like, I got myself some trim in temple. I don't know if chicks just don't put out on Saturday. What the deal is, there's a much more sexually, much more deviant Catholic and the Christians. The Jews, they go there to... See, I think church is like some sort of social event for a lot of...

1:35:24 Drew Yeah, Jews get a lot.

1:35:25 Adam Jews go there, they take care of business, man.

1:35:27 Drew Business and complain.

1:35:28 Adam Business and complain, and then they got to go home.

1:35:30 Caller They got to go home and have sex.

1:35:31 Adam They got to go home and eat, but no one's ever scorned at temple. Okay. We're going to take a little break, and we'll be back after this.

1:35:45 Caller Love Line will be right back.

1:36:15 Adam Nothing, nothing there. You sit next to them and you go, how many million a year are you getting? Holy Christ, I'm going to kill myself. No, kill my agent, then I kill myself. All right, guys, thanks for coming in. Stroke 9, everybody, go out and get that CD. It is solid as sears.

1:36:31 Caller There you go.

1:36:32 Adam Appreciate it.

1:36:32 Caller Thanks for having us.

1:36:33 Adam Thanks a lot, man. Our pleasure. Come back anytime you like, and that money is yours to keep as well as the Burbank ticket stub. Man, you can cheat that.

1:36:41 Caller Here, you want a guitar pick.

1:36:42 Adam Thank you.

1:36:43 Caller Yeah, there you go.

1:36:44 Adam Can I have that?

1:36:44 Caller Go home and practice. It doesn't even have our name on it, though.

1:36:46 Adam David Arquette tomorrow night, and until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. Ba dum ba, ba dum ba dum ba dum ba. Hoo, ba dum ba dum ba dum ba.

1:36:56 Drew Hoo long.

1:37:00 Adam Well now.

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Monday, January 17, 2000