3:39
Voiceover
Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.
3:46
Voiceover
Listener discretion is advised.
3:48
Voiceover
Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew. I'm not modeling anymore for the two of you. Loveline.
3:55
Adam
Corolla, that is Dr. Bruce filling in for Dr. Drew, who is in Philadelphia making money, doing something other than his job. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-44-55, don't worry. Dr. Bruce is a board certified physician. He's also addiction medicine specialist, and he specializes in emergency medicine.
4:18
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Thank you.
4:18
Adam
Is that all right, Bruce?
4:20
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Perfect.
4:21
Adam
All right. Rza from the Wu-Tang Clan is here tonight, and also from many, many other endeavors. And we're here to talk tonight, to talk to Ghost Dogg, which is a new movie, Forrest Whitaker is in it. Rza also has a smallish part in it.
4:39
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Camouflage.
4:41
Adam
In camouflage. And you did the soundtrack for this one, right?
4:45
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, I did the score and the soundtrack for that one.
4:47
Adam
Now, do you, when you do the score and do the soundtrack for something, do you do it all yourself or do you work with other people or how does that work?
4:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
This particular case, I did it all myself on this one.
4:59
Adam
So, we're going to hear some stuff off of the soundtrack before the night is through. I should mention that the film Ghost Dogg opens the 17th of March, but it opens in New York tomorrow. Just New York, not New York, LA?
5:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, just, I think, New York tomorrow and everywhere else on the 17th.
5:21
Adam
Nationwide on the 17th?
5:22
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Nationwide.
5:23
Adam
What's the movie about?
5:24
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Ghost Dogg is the way of the Samurai. It's about a man in the hood who studies the Haka-Kuri book and lives by a special code, and there's nothing you could do to break him out of the code.
5:37
Adam
And he, yeah, keep going, I'm sorry.
5:40
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Fawc Whitaker is the star of the film. He plays Ghost Dogg, who's a hitman, but a real nice guy in the neighborhood, you wouldn't really know exactly what he do, but he's actually a hitman.
5:49
Adam
And is it a thriller? Is it a horror? Is it a drama?
5:55
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What would you call it? It's a Jim Jarmusch film. So, you know, Jim Jarmusch, you know, makes some films that has more layers to it. But it's got great comedy to it, has a real good message. I think the young people who are out here in America could go check out, because The Hocka-Curry Book is a real serious book. A lot of enlightenment inside that book.
6:18
Adam
Discipline.
6:20
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I think that's something we could use in our society.
6:23
Adam
Kids go for that stuff. They really like it. Well, I don't know. They could go for a little more discipline. I think that's the one thing that's missing today from kids. A little discipline. I don't want to sound old, but no matter what you do in life, and I don't care if you're doing exactly what you want to do for a living, I don't care if you're selling drugs for a living, you need discipline. But I think the kids' image of entertainers is that they're just so talented, they don't have to practice their art, they don't have to work at it.
6:50
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You gotta have discipline. Mosh Wash is a very disciplined thing you gotta be into. This film is based on Mosh Wash's principle, but it's not a Mosh Wash film.
7:01
Adam
Right.
7:02
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And the discipline that he has is more of a mental discipline about himself. He also, there's a thing that he has, like a lot of pigeons on the roof that he controls, and he even had a patience to train a bird, and to be less disciplined. You gotta have that kind of patience and discipline.
7:18
Adam
Does boxing take discipline, Adam? Yes. Adam's a boxing instructor. Well, I used to be. But that's a good example of something where people think these guys are just big thugs that go in there, beat the crap out of someone, and then go home and buy jewelry or something. But the reality is, if you want to get to the top of any game, it's all discipline no matter how much God-given ability you have.
7:42
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right.
7:42
Adam
We will go to the phones, and talk to some of our undisciplined listeners. Christina?
7:49
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Hello.
7:50
Adam
You're 18.
7:51
Drew
Yes, I am.
7:51
Adam
What's up?
7:53
Drew
I smoked some marijuana on Thursday, and I had to done it for about six months, and then I had to take a drug test on Monday, and I only took one or two hits off of that, off the bong. And I was wondering, my boyfriend bought me one of those test-pure drinks, Dr. Bruce, and I was wondering if those work.
8:09
Adam
Generally, those don't make any difference, but it depends on who's doing the test, how sophisticated the testing is. They generally cause you have a more dilute urine, and it's just like if you take the same amount of a solid substance and put it in a gallon versus a cup of water, the testing devices will... Wait a minute, what are those liquids that you're supposed to drink to dilute it? There's goldenseal, there are various herbal preparations. They're expensive, it costs 20, 25 bucks for a box. But what about if you had a bong load the night before you had to go get drug tested and you just drank two gallons of water? Would that do anything? No. No, you're going to test positive. The whole thing is there's a... Yeah? Yeah, there's nothing you can really do.
8:49
Drew
So I'm going to come out positive even though I only...
8:51
Adam
No. Well, you said you waited how many days? Four or five days?
8:54
Drew
Yeah, but I only took one hit and I had to smoke in forever.
8:56
Adam
The thing is, if you're negative, you would have been negative anyway. The people are making a lot of money off of these herbal preparations and they don't really work. And today the testing is quite sophisticated in most places and if there's any question, the final test is GC mass spec. It fractionates or breaks down the substance and it's like a fingerprint. The same analogy would be a fingerprint testing. You can't fool that test. All right, Christina, where are you trying to get a job?
9:22
Drew
Um, I don't want to say.
9:24
Adam
Well, is it, is...
9:25
Drew
It's for like a restaurant theater type place and they just drug test everyone and I really need this job and she hasn't called me back.
9:32
Adam
Restaurant theater? You're talking about Chuck E. Cheese?
9:34
Drew
Something a little more high class than that, Adam, but...
9:37
Adam
Yeah, because you're going to get in that rat outfit. You better be stoned. Why was your boyfriend trying to get you to take a couple hits off the bonk?
9:43
Drew
Because he knows... Oh, no, my boyfriend wasn't trying. He's the one that wanted me to get this job, basically, so I'm going to test positive then.
9:49
Adam
No, no, you'll be fine. Yeah, I mean, you can't say yes or I can't say yes or no, but it's unlikely a couple of hits four or five days. Unlikely.
9:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Have you ever tried red clover? I mean, I use a lot of red clover before my test. Really? Red clover is an actual herb that I had to take before I had to go see my own PO officer a few years ago. Really?
10:11
Adam
And does it work? Well, with the older tests, some of these. What is red clover? Is it just an herb?
10:17
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yes, a herb. Red clover. Red clover leaf. It went to your local drug store or health food store and tried out one.
10:24
Adam
And how often were you getting tested? I'm asking you, Richard.
10:30
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Every Tuesday.
10:31
Adam
Every Tuesday. And you would take the red clover Tuesday morning or Monday night or when you take it?
10:39
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I try to at least get 48 hours on it.
10:41
Adam
I see.
10:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, about 48 hours on it.
10:43
Adam
And you see, pot stays in you longer than coke or like heroin or anything else, right? So your brain, your body, fat tissues are like sponges. So the more you use, the longer it's going to take to clear. I had a guy that said. Well, what if you're a skinny guy? What if you're like Snoop Dogg? You get stoned all the time, but you got no fat on you? Where's the pot hide? He snoops still got probably 10, 20 percent of his body fat. It is 10, 20 percent body fat. So it doesn't matter. I'd like to smoke that. Three or four months, he's going to still be positive.
11:13
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right.
11:14
Adam
Well, what's he care? Mike?
11:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
11:16
Adam
You're 19.
11:17
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
11:18
Adam
What's up?
11:19
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I'm a long time listener, first time caller. I just want to give a shout out to Man A's.
11:24
Adam
Oh, that's my rap name, by the way, or is it? What do you think?
11:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Man A's?
11:27
Adam
Man A's.
11:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, Man A's. All right.
11:30
Adam
You know what I mean?
11:31
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yes, there's no splitting on the bread.
11:33
Adam
With a Z, right?
11:35
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
That's my May May Man A's. All right.
11:37
Adam
Snoop.
11:38
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, I love that clip.
11:39
Adam
All right, Mike, what's up?
11:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Anyways, me and my girlfriend were having unprotected sex like a couple of days ago, and I kind of came at her a little bit, and I kind of got worried, so we went and got the morning after pill.
11:53
Adam
Kind of, kind of, kind of. Yeah, as long as it was only half a nut, you should be fine. Yeah, so you got the morning after pill, and what happened?
12:01
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And she's supposed to get her period on the 15th coming up, but she got it yesterday.
12:08
Adam
You're supposed to have bleeding within three to four weeks when you take that. Right, with the whole idea is you're interrupting what's normally happening there, and you want to affect ovulation, and as Drew usually points out, this is not an abortion, what, an aborifactin, was that the correct term? A lot of people have, take objection to this method because they say it's like causing an abortion, but you're trying to upset the process by which ovulation occurs, and bleeding is supposed to occur within a period of time. All right, so that's because she took the pills. Right. Are you hip to this, Reza? Do you know what this is?
12:39
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I never heard of this pill before.
12:41
Adam
There's a couple of pills, quiet down Bruce, who's the doctor here? There's a couple of pills you can take, like let's say the condom breaks, or you don't pull out in time, or for whatever reason you think you may have gotten your woman pregnant. Within 72 hours, within three days, if you take a combination of these birth control pills, it'll prevent her from getting pregnant. It doesn't abort the pregnancy, it just doesn't let her get pregnant.
13:04
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
13:05
Adam
So, everyone should have this combination of pills, this morning after pills on a nightstand, because if the condom breaks or whatever happens, you just take these pills and you're out of the woods.
13:17
Drew
Hi.
13:17
Adam
You're 13.
13:19
Drew
Yeah.
13:19
Adam
What's up?
13:20
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
13:21
Drew
I have this cold floor kind of thing next to my lip, and I was wondering if it was herpes or not. It's not really cold floor, but it's like a floor next to my lip. I'm wondering if that's herpes.
13:31
Adam
Are you sexually active?
13:32
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No.
13:34
Adam
Can you fax me a faxom way of your face or?
13:37
Drew
No, I don't have a faxom way of my face.
13:39
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
13:39
Adam
First of all, cold sores are pretty easy to diagnose. They usually have an irregular surface, and you have a discharge or a watery substance that comes out of it. I mean, what exactly are you having there? Is it hurt a lot? Is it painless?
13:57
Drew
It doesn't hurt, but it's like a bump. It's like brazed.
14:00
Adam
Okay.
14:00
Drew
And like if I...
14:01
Adam
All right, but wait a minute. What are you worried about? What's... Have you had oral sacs? Drew, I mean, Bruce, settle down for a second. Wait a minute, do you have oral sacs?
14:09
Drew
No, but I'm wondering if I did... Could I give somebody a herpes...
14:14
Adam
Why? Are you planning on it?
14:16
Drew
Well, I mean, I don't know.
14:18
Adam
Yeah, you never know. You wake up, penis is in your mouth. I know what it's like. Hey, Carmen, you're 13, right? You're 13. Do you have a boyfriend?
14:28
Drew
Yeah.
14:28
Adam
And you think you may give him oral sex sometime soon?
14:32
Drew
Yeah, and I just want to know if I could give that to him.
14:34
Adam
How old is he?
14:36
Drew
What?
14:36
Adam
How old is your boyfriend?
14:38
Drew
13.
14:38
Adam
Son of a bitch. 13. I wouldn't have known what to do. My head would have exploded if a woman gave me oral sex at 13. And you're going to do this for free, right?
14:48
Drew
No, I'm not going to do it, but he's, I mean, if I do...
14:52
Adam
Well, listen, wait a minute. You're not going to do it, right?
14:55
Drew
Probably not.
14:56
Adam
Probably not. Well, just wait till the cold sore goes away. No, you can give them that. Yeah, there's herpes one and two, and the one is the mouth area, two is the genital area, but they crisscross back and forth, so you definitely don't want to do it. But at 13, what do you do when thinking of oral sex? Well, she's just... It's a hypothetical. Do you want to ask about... No, I don't care. Well, I care. Rza, when did you get your first piece of oral sex?
15:20
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
13. 13. Maybe 11 or 13.
15:24
Adam
Everyone got it early. How old was the woman?
15:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
She was one year older.
15:28
Adam
Oh, nice.
15:30
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Pretty cool.
15:30
Adam
Yeah, that's pretty good at 13. That's when you can really enjoy it. It's like Disneyland for your penis.
15:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You go to Disneyland. It comes out that much.
15:40
Adam
You go to Disneyland now as an adult, it's no big deal, but when you went as a kid, it was a big deal. Oral sex, same thing. But the question she's asked that I thought she'd ask is indicative of how little she's prepared to have sex or be sexually active. All right, no one will have sex on your watch. Don't worry, Bruce. Tony?
15:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Hello?
15:57
Adam
You're 17. What's up?
15:59
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, my girlfriend said she was a virgin, but the first time we had sex she didn't believe. I was wondering if, I don't know, maybe she was lying.
16:08
Adam
Was there a hymen there?
16:10
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I don't know what it would feel like.
16:13
Adam
Well, it'd be like you're trying to bang a trampoline.
16:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It kind of felt that way, but there was no bleeding or anything. There was no blood at all.
16:22
Adam
Are you a detective or why do you want to determine this by the blood method here?
16:26
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I don't know. I just thought maybe-
16:28
Adam
No, that's not a necessity. It's something that that can break in other ways. But how old's your girlfriend?
16:35
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
She's 17 too.
16:36
Adam
Yeah, she could have broke it in a motorcycle accident or a plane crash, horseback riding. The hymen can go many different ways. It doesn't have to just be through sex.
16:47
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right.
16:47
Adam
All right. Okay. Don't worry. She's pure as driven snow. Just oral sex and anal sex. Until you, brother.
16:55
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right.
16:55
Adam
All right, Tony.
16:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
16:56
Adam
You sleep like a baby.
16:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Thanks a lot. All right.
16:59
Adam
Let's see. Julie.
17:01
Drew
Yeah.
17:02
Adam
You're 15.
17:03
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Uh-huh.
17:03
Adam
What's up?
17:04
Drew
Okay. Well, I sort of got with this junior guy who's 17. And he didn't exactly keep his mouth shut.
17:18
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And-
17:18
Adam
What'd you do with him?
17:21
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Third.
17:23
Adam
What?
17:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Third.
17:24
Adam
Third base? Oral sex? Yeah. Yeah. I miss that diamond. I wish adults would use that, you know, basis thing.
17:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Right.
17:38
Adam
Julie.
17:38
Drew
Yeah?
17:39
Adam
Try not to use the F word on the air, all right, Julia? It's more for the basis to the major leagues.
17:43
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, no.
17:44
Drew
I didn't mean to. I'm sorry.
17:45
Adam
All right. So you gave the guy some oral sex. And how do you know the guy?
17:51
Drew
Met him through a friend.
17:52
Adam
All right. Was this at a party or something?
17:55
Drew
No, just kind of got together over the weekend.
17:58
Adam
All right. And now he's telling everybody?
18:00
Drew
Well, he said he only told one person.
18:05
Adam
Right. But that person had a bullhorn.
18:07
Drew
Yeah.
18:08
Adam
So someone told a bunch of people. So he's a junior?
18:12
Drew
Yeah.
18:12
Adam
He's about what, 16, 17?
18:15
Drew
17.
18:15
Adam
And now what? You're worried about your reputation?
18:18
Drew
Well, yeah, just a little.
18:20
Adam
Now, did you think this was an act of love and intimacy on his part or?
18:24
Drew
Well, we're going out, so.
18:26
Adam
Oh, you are?
18:26
Drew
Yeah.
18:27
Adam
All right. Well, everyone can know his girlfriend's a slut.
18:31
Drew
Yeah.
18:32
Adam
In other words. I'm just kidding.
18:33
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
But did you have sex with him?
18:35
Drew
No.
18:36
Adam
That's nothing in this day and age, is it, Julie?
18:40
Drew
It is where I live.
18:41
Adam
Where do you live?
18:43
Drew
I'd rather not say.
18:44
Adam
All right. All right. So you guys are going out now?
18:47
Drew
Yeah.
18:48
Adam
How long? Well, since last weekend.
18:51
Drew
Happened like two weeks ago.
18:53
Adam
All right. So it happened when you started going out?
18:55
Drew
Yeah.
18:56
Adam
OK. All right. So what do you what do you propose to do about it now?
19:00
Drew
I'm not really sure.
19:02
Adam
Well, listen, listen, pardon the pun, but this will blow over. Just tell him to keep his trap shut or you're not going to open your mouth or your legs. That's right. Nothing will be open.
19:14
Drew
Oh, don't worry.
19:16
Adam
Sex is a recreational activity for guys at that age. And if you expect any kind of intimacy out of it, you're fooling yourself. Listen, I'm 35 years old. I get a blowjob. I rent out billboard space. Sir, if you want recreational activity for sex, that's fine, but not at 16. Would you shut up, Bruce? How many cups of coffee did you have before you started? This is my first one. Put that mic down. You're too excited. Put that mic down and lean back a little. I need room to operate.
19:40
Drew
Just be nice.
19:41
Adam
All right. All right. Now calm down. It's feast or famine with this guy. Either he's yapping like an auctioneer high on speed or you can't get a goddamn word out of him by poking him with a stick. Asshole. Just quiet down over there. I'm saying you can't expect your average 17-year-old not to blab a little when he gets to oral sex. And you shouldn't expect her to have sex on the first date like that. All right. And she's learning what happens when you do. Sharon?
20:09
Drew
Hey.
20:09
Adam
Hey, you're 14. What's up?
20:11
Drew
Yeah. When I was seven, I got raped by my cousins.
20:16
Adam
Cousins?
20:17
Drew
Yeah.
20:18
Adam
Two guys?
20:19
Drew
Yeah.
20:19
Adam
Wow. You were how old? Seven. How old were they?
20:23
Drew
Well, one was eight and one was like 12. Eight?
20:26
Adam
What the hell is the eight-year-old doing? All right.
20:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
So.
20:30
Drew
And lately, like, I've been having bad dreams and it's just like been bothering me a lot. And I see these cousins like a lot, like every other weekend.
20:38
Adam
Well, what happened? This just happened one time?
20:41
Drew
Twice. But I was too scared to tell anyone because they were like a lot bigger than me.
20:45
Adam
And was it violent?
20:47
Drew
Well, kind of like it was in a pool one time and they almost tried to drown me.
20:51
Adam
Was it violent? What kind of question is that? What difference does it make? What do you mean? I want to know if they were, you know, threatening her with something or holding her down or hitting her.
20:59
Drew
Yeah, they were like holding her.
21:00
Adam
Very valid question, you imbecile. I'm sorry Bruce had to chime in that way. Do you have anybody that you can talk to now that's a responsible adult?
21:09
Drew
Well, yeah, but I don't really like, I'm wondering if I should tell someone because I'm kind of feeling uncomfortable but then it happened a long time ago.
21:16
Adam
Absolutely. You know what? It's like it happened just yesterday because when you're 14, this is when these kind of memories are going to start creeping up on you and the dreams and things are going to get much worse. If you talk, listen to me, if you talk to somebody, things are going to get a lot better and you're not going to have a lot of the consequences. You hear some of the kids calling in here and they're having sex over and over and they don't know why and it gets out of control. What happened to you can cause that to happen and can cause you to feel more out of control. It will be the best thing you ever did if you talk to somebody that's a responsible adult and they'll know how to get you the help you need. What are these two hoodlums up to now?
21:51
Drew
Nothing.
21:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
They're just still going to school.
21:53
Drew
They're not like hoodlums or anything.
21:56
Adam
They turn out to be criminals? Somebody did something to them, you understand? Especially the 8 year old. They've been molested and it's a cycle that repeats itself. I don't know. Maybe certainly the 12 year old, the 8 year old, is probably just a man who's got caught in between or something. He experienced molestation and he was involved with her if that was his initiation. Sharon, what's up with your family?
22:20
Drew
Oh, we're okay. I mean, I'm looking at good environment and stuff. I'm not like...
22:24
Adam
What about your cousin's family?
22:25
Drew
Oh, they're like, the older one's gay now.
22:28
Adam
Oh yeah. Somebody, somebody... Adam's off. Somebody bent his antenna early. Listen, I know the gay guys hate when I talk this way, but all the guys who call in the show who are gay, somebody got to them early. And this is what happened. Somebody got to this kid, somebody molested him, then he in turn molested his young cousin, and now, lo and behold, as an adult, he's gay. Somebody... this is what happens. You scramble a kid and then he scrambles another kid.
23:00
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Right. It's good to talk to somebody in adult about that because you don't want those thoughts provoking you to come with some kind of perverted ideas yourself, you know?
23:11
Adam
And listen, Sharon, the thing that's not going to happen, it's not going to come back on you from these kids. There's not going to be a responsible adult that would go to them and say, oh, she told me this or that. This is not going to be a bad thing if you talk to somebody. Do you have a school counselor you can tell?
23:27
Drew
Yeah.
23:28
Adam
Okay. Can you do that for us and call us back?
23:31
Drew
Yeah. Could I just tell like an older friend?
23:33
Adam
No. No, that doesn't count. You got to talk to somebody in some position. Yeah. If the older friend is a school counselor, yeah.
23:40
Drew
Well, he's like 22.
23:42
Adam
All right. Well, talk to him and see if you work with metal. Is he responsible?
23:47
Drew
Yeah.
23:47
Adam
How do you know him?
23:49
Drew
He's my brother's best friend and he's really nice.
23:51
Adam
What does he do for a living?
23:54
Drew
I'd rather not say.
23:55
Adam
What kind of work? Come on.
23:56
Drew
Well, he like does stuff with packages.
23:58
Adam
Packages? No. I don't trust this guy. He works in a hot dog factory. Are you kidding me? You talk to a guy who's got a real job and a degree, all right?
24:08
Drew
And also, like I've noticed that I'm more attracted to older guys.
24:11
Adam
Yeah, that's because of what happened. You better start talking to someone, Sharon. Do you go to church? Do you have a youth pastor?
24:18
Drew
No. Well, I like to go to some like youth council thing.
24:21
Adam
All right, go there and talk to somebody because you're going to be dating a guy who's 28 years old, drives an El Camino, and wears a cigarette rolled up in his sleeve.
24:32
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Don't talk to the 22-year-old guy because he's going to do that, take advantage of you, knowing that you're not an official virgin and everything. He will use that to take advantage of you, so don't talk to him. Talk to someone much older, much more mature.
24:44
Adam
Amber.
24:45
Drew
Hey, guys.
24:45
Adam
You're 20.
24:47
Drew
Yeah. I had a question for you guys. My girlfriend and I sometimes let our really good friend join in when we have sex together. I'm pretty much open to anything he wants to do because I'm a nice person, and he expressed an interest in anal sex.
25:04
Adam
Hold on. You're a lesbian?
25:05
Drew
I'm bi.
25:06
Adam
You're bi. And so you have a girlfriend? And there's a friend of yours who's a male who gets to join in?
25:15
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And how old are you?
25:16
Drew
I'm 20.
25:17
Adam
Uh-huh. And do you live with your girlfriend?
25:19
Drew
Yeah.
25:20
Adam
And this guy gets to just join in when you guys have sex? Yeah. Son of a bitch. I have two TV shows and a national radio show. I don't get to join in. You have boundaries. When lesbians have sex. Well, listen, their boundary issues, threesomes usually just almost always destroy relationships. Well, who cares? They're lesbians. It's not going on forever, irregardless of Adam's judgment. Well, let her ask her question. Now the guy wants anal sex?
25:46
Drew
Yeah.
25:46
Adam
Oh, man. Is Eve pushing?
25:48
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Is he greedy or not?
25:49
Adam
Yeah.
25:50
Drew
No, I don't have a problem with that, but I want to use a condom because I'm totally a safety girl. And he says that we can't because it's going to break. So I want to know if condoms break during anal sex.
26:00
Adam
No. What do you think all the gays use? You can't because it's going to break. So what if it breaks? Why not at least put it on and use lubricant and hope it doesn't break? What's this point if it breaks? Wait a minute. Condoms, I mean, that's their main use is for the butt. Exactly. So I'm saying what's... If he's saying, well, it might break, don't use it. What's the point? I don't understand. All right. Well, tell him no. Tell him he has to use a condom. Okay. What's... This is his recreational activity. This doesn't sound like a healthy guy. What? What do you mean? It sounds just like a regular guy to me who stumbled on to a goldmine.
26:34
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Sounds cool. It sounds like a guy that... Where do you live?
26:38
Drew
I live in Carson City, Nevada.
26:40
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, man.
26:41
Adam
This guy's playing the lots and playing the lesbians. He's having a great time. Now, and he gets to have sex whenever he wants with the two of you?
26:52
Drew
Whenever he comes over.
26:53
Adam
Now, don't you get jealous when he's having sex with your girlfriend?
26:57
Drew
No.
26:57
Adam
No? You don't mind?
26:59
Drew
No.
26:59
Adam
And even though she's your girl, you don't mind seeing him on top of her?
27:03
Drew
No.
27:04
Adam
You will. What about the anal sex with her?
27:07
Drew
No, she won't do it.
27:08
Adam
She won't?
27:09
Drew
No, I'm the one that gets stuck with it.
27:11
Adam
She has very delicate sensibilities. Let me tell you something. I don't know what your issues are, but you have issues. This is not... No, it's not normal. This guy is not going to go on to a healthy relationship with a woman. Oh, who cares? Put the condom on, okay?
27:23
Drew
Think that I'm problems.
27:24
Adam
All right. And I'll see you in therapy. All right? You'll see. You'll see her in Carson City. Oh, man.
27:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Come to my car, son.
27:30
Adam
Yeah. Man, son of a bitch. No strings attached. Now he's going for the anal sex. That's what I love about guys. The guy stumbles on to the greatest, luckiest find ever. Two lesbians who don't give a rat's ass whether he bangs both of them, watches, wax off, does whatever on both of them. But now he's got up the anty a little. I think I'm going for the back door and on top of that, no condom. He's fighting for the no condom. This guy's the limit for this guy. Oh man, he's going to be a captain of industry one day. You know, you need a guitar if you want to get more activity.
28:09
Adam
Not shows, TV shows, radio shows. I can't play instruments. Yeah, with Henry Rolland. Rizzo's here from Wu-Tang Clan. He's plugging Ghost Dog, new movie out this Saturday in New York and then March 17th. Oh, this Friday.
28:26
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
This Friday, New York. And Nationwide.
28:28
Adam
That's right. We're going to hear something off the Ghost Dog soundtrack when we come back. It's Loveline. Adam Carolla, that's Dr. Bruce filming for Dr. Drew. Rizzo's here from the Wu-Tang Clan. And Ghost Dogg is the name of the movie. He's here promoting tonight. Stars Forrest Whitaker.
28:48
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He also give us some advice if I can.
28:51
Adam
You certainly can. Give all you like. We'll hear something off the Ghost Dogg soundtrack, which our guests scored and produced and all that good stuff. In just one second, I think we'll take one call and then we'll hear something off the soundtrack. Sarah?
29:08
Drew
Yeah.
29:08
Adam
You're 19. What's up?
29:11
Drew
I went to a party about a week and a half ago and I got really, really drunk and I was also I was smoking some pot and ever since then, I haven't been right. Like I've been having like panic attacks. I don't know how you describe them. Everything gets really blurry and I just totally freak out.
29:33
Adam
Do you smoke pot normally?
29:34
Drew
No, I don't. That's the thing. I mean, it's been probably like five, six years since I have.
29:40
Adam
Right. Well, this can we get this all the time. Very common.
29:45
Drew
Is it really?
29:46
Adam
Yeah. You got to smoke more pot. You have to not not smoke pot. Pot is technically in a hallucinogen class. When people smoke pot, it's the setting and the mindset that determines the experience they have. But it can also bring out underlying depressions, anxiety disorders. And some people that have some of these underlying disorders in which they feel more euphoric or feel better when they smoke it will continue on almost immediately a daily basis to self-medicate with it.
30:11
Drew
That's another thing too. I'm bipolar and I do feel like I want to do it more and I feel like I want to drink a lot more often.
30:21
Adam
You know it's interesting in addiction medicine we're finding some of these drugs will set off the brain. The brain will almost say, wow, that's something I've been missing. I need that on a daily basis and you set off the addiction. So you need to get to somebody that's a psychiatrist that practices addiction medicine not as like you know nothing against psychiatrists that don't have a lot of experience with it but if you've had this type of experience you need to see a psychiatrist that treats patients that have addictive disorders. Well hold on, Bruce, what if she just hung loose for another week to see what happened? No, the trigger has been pulled once the trigger is pulled in the brain. You know I'm not just saying everybody needs to go see a shrink. In your case you've got a history of bipolar disorder. You've had this experience with the mood-altering substances. It's all ready to go. Do you want to do it in 20 years? Do you want to do it now? Your parents don't want to do it in 20. Are your parents alcoholics?
31:14
Drew
My father is a non-functioning alcoholic, yeah.
31:17
Adam
All right, well there you go.
31:18
Drew
I have a question too. My doctor, my psychiatrist, is the director of the addictions, the addictions counseling for a big hospital by me. But I'm scared to say anything because he's threatened to put me into like a long-term facility because I have a lot of like really, I have like a really bad history and I get like really bad depressive episodes. And I was wondering too, is it bad because I'm on a lot of medication. Could that have something to do with it?
31:51
Adam
Absolutely. Yeah.
31:53
Drew
Okay.
31:54
Adam
Are you on lithium or Neuron, Tegretol, Depakote?
31:57
Drew
Last time, last time I called, Adam made fun of me because I'm on so much. I'm on lithium, Depakote, WellBeautry, Lexa.
32:04
Adam
You had the- Let her keep going. Shut the hell up. Please stop with the coffee. Go ahead, sir. Keep going.
32:12
Drew
Another one. Fina- What do you call it? Fina-Barbatol.
32:16
Adam
Fina-Barbatol?
32:17
Drew
Yeah.
32:17
Adam
And you had the question about the oral contraceptive last time?
32:19
Drew
Yeah. How did you remember?
32:21
Adam
Because I'm smarter than him. Because he doesn't smoke pot. That's how he remembers. Yeah.
32:26
Drew
Adam, I was the damn plan one.
32:29
Adam
You were the what?
32:29
Drew
The damn plan. Do you remember that?
32:31
Adam
No. What the hell is the damn plan?
32:33
Drew
No. Remember, I called and I was really suicidal and I said that I was in the hospital because I tried to jump off. I was going to plan on jumping off a dam.
32:45
Adam
Oh, right.
32:46
Drew
Yeah.
32:46
Adam
Yeah. And I told you not to do that. You would pollute the water for the rest of the village.
32:50
Drew
Yeah. Actually, no. A lot of bad things happen to them, but I'm fine.
32:54
Adam
All right. Hey, hey, Sarah, Sarah. Oh, hold on. Listen to me.
32:58
Drew
Yeah.
32:58
Adam
You know that doctor who thinks maybe you should be institutionalized?
33:02
Drew
Yeah.
33:02
Adam
He may have a point.
33:04
Drew
I'm sorry.
33:05
Adam
You know what I mean?
33:06
Drew
I'm a good kid.
33:07
Adam
Right. I know you're a good kid and a lot of bad things happen to you, but why maybe you should let the experts do their job and maybe you should listen to them and maybe they have your best interests in mind. But you know what I'm saying?
33:22
Drew
I can't, though. I mean.
33:24
Adam
Listen, you're not talking about going to see this guy, right? There's somebody else you can see that's got these credentials. You've got to you've got to be seeing a psychiatrist right now.
33:32
Drew
Yeah, I am seeing. That's the one that's the director of the addictions.
33:36
Adam
That's the guy. That's the guy to see. Please, please share with them what happened. The fact that you go back voluntarily and share with him is an indicator you don't need to be hospitalized or institutionalized. So continue to act rationally and you're not going to get consequences like being thrown in the hospital. Okay.
33:52
Drew
Okay.
33:52
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Go get yourself a copy of the Huckleberry book.
33:56
Drew
Oh, Dr. Drew and Adam, I have your book but I want to know when your next book is going to come out.
34:01
Adam
Never.
34:01
Drew
I know Dr. Drew is not there.
34:03
Adam
Yeah. I'm done writing books.
34:05
Drew
Oh, come on. I love reading your books.
34:07
Adam
All right. I'm writing a book about Adam. Listen. It'll be on the hot off the press. You read it again.
34:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
34:13
Adam
All right, sir. All right.
34:14
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Thanks.
34:16
Adam
Oh, man. I remember asking her last time. When she got about halfway into the list of medications she was on, I said, listen, just tell us the ones you're not on. Sounded shorter this time. It'll be faster. Yeah. I think she may have skipped a few.
34:28
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah. She may need to go see Ghost Dog this next weekend, and that may help her out there.
34:34
Adam
I'm sure she'll be a new woman when she comes back.
34:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Go see Ghost Dog and they give us a call.
34:40
Adam
What are the martial arts and meditation practices to really help people with mental health? Oh, absolutely. Sure as hell couldn't hurt. Hey, at least you can kick a little ass in a pinch. All right. Riz is a guest tonight for the Wu-Tang Clan, and he has himself a score, which is the Ghost Dog score, and we're going to hear something off of that soundtrack.
35:02
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We're going to play Walking Through the Darkness, right? By my artist, The Keeper.
35:06
Adam
That's the one we're playing. Ghost Dog opening in New York on Friday. That is tomorrow and March 17th, Nationwide.
35:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Nationwide. We got a city list. We'll read off maybe before we finish the show.
35:20
Adam
Oh, that's quite a list. Yeah. All right. I'll check into that. Naomi?
35:26
Drew
Yeah.
35:26
Adam
You're 24? You're male to female, transsexual?
35:32
Drew
Yeah.
35:33
Adam
You are?
35:34
Drew
Yes.
35:34
Adam
What was your man name?
35:36
Drew
I'd really rather not go there.
35:38
Adam
Really?
35:38
Drew
Worked very hard to shed that.
35:40
Adam
Right. You're one of those men, one of those women that were trapped inside a man's body?
35:46
Drew
Exactly. A girl that couldn't prove she was one.
35:49
Adam
Right. I know what you're saying.
35:51
Drew
Yeah. And you know, Adam, I heard you saying that you'd have the world at your feet if you were gay or you liked the fat chicks, but you'd also have if you liked the training chicks, because we're like always a sure bet.
36:01
Adam
Oh, really? Yeah.
36:01
Drew
We're like the loneliest women on earth.
36:03
Adam
Yeah. Yeah. But you know, my problem is, is I don't look at you as chicks completely. I look at you as guys without the Johnson, which is different, you know, although you sound like you've made a nice, smooth transition into a chickdom.
36:19
Drew
Well, thanks.
36:20
Adam
Great.
36:21
Drew
I was born this way, so I've come pretty naturally.
36:24
Adam
You were born a woman?
36:26
Drew
Well, I was born psychologically female.
36:28
Adam
Right. That just means nuts, by the way.
36:31
Drew
Well, all right.
36:32
Adam
Just because you like sandals.
36:33
Drew
No, I could say the same thing about you, though.
36:35
Adam
All right. Hold on a second there, screwball. We're going to take a little break, and then we'll get back with Naomi. This whole business, people go like... See, first off, there's a few things I find interesting about this. One is, I've said it a million times, but it's endlessly fascinating to me, which is you have to undergo one year of psychiatric evaluation before you get the penis cut off. So they have to make sure you're completely sane, before some guy chops off your Johnson. And to me, if you, at the end of that year, still want to lose the willy, you're still nuts. Because that is the definition of insanity to me. Cut the Johnson off. It's just a trapping of what the person is not. Alright, I'll give my theories on the whole transsexual thing. She may give her theories about me, more with Rza from the Wu-Tang clan, and we'll be back after this. Yes, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Bruce. He's filling in for Dr. Drew. He is just disqualified even though you wouldn't know it by looking at him. Rza is our guest tonight from the Wu-Tang clan. He's done the soundtrack from the new film Ghost Dog, which will be out tomorrow if you're in New York. That is Friday, and nationwide it will be released March 17th. Let me just give a quick plug for something that I'm working on before we hop back and speak to Naomi the He-She. This Saturday, 11 o'clock in Long Beach, trampoline cattle call. The Fabulous Man Show is going to set up the trampoline. As you know, we're famous for girls jumping on trampolines. And we will set it up at the El Dorado East Regional Park in Long Beach. And you can jump on the trampoline. And we'll film you, not you, Bruce. We'll make a star out of all you beautiful young ladies over 18 years of age.
38:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Nice rack.
38:39
Adam
Again, it's at the El Dorado East Regional Park, which is in Long Beach. And grab a pad and pencil because I'm going to give you a phone number. 323-769-5538. 323-769-5538 for the Trampoline Cattle Call. This Saturday, 11 o'clock, Long Beach, El Dorado Park. We'll give that number out before the night is through. Naomi?
39:10
Drew
Yeah.
39:10
Adam
All right, so you're 24. And you've always been a female trapped inside a male's body.
39:19
Drew
Yeah. Yeah, that's a nice way to put it.
39:22
Adam
Right. And so now, how come no one else gets trapped inside bodies? There's no black people trapped in white people's bodies. There's no Asians trapped in black bodies. There's no dogs trapped in cats' bodies. And there's not even any men trapped in women's bodies. It's only women trapped in men's bodies. Is it bigot trapped in your body?
39:44
Drew
Actually, Adam, there are quite a few men trapped in women's bodies. There are a lot of male to male transsexuals also.
39:51
Adam
Well, there's only time a man gets trapped in a woman's bodies when she locks her vagina up.
39:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Let me read from the Haka-Kiri book for you.
39:59
Adam
Go ahead.
40:00
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It is bad when one thing becomes two. One should not look for anything else in the way of the samurai. It is the same for anything else that is called the way. If you understand things in this manner, you should be able to hear about all ways and be more and more accord with your own. So it is very bad when one thing becomes two.
40:19
Adam
Word up. There's nothing in there about the samurai lopping off your Johnson either.
40:25
Drew
Yeah, that was just bloody profound. Okay.
40:28
Adam
But I got to tell you, Naomi, you sound chick-like.
40:31
Drew
Well, thank you.
40:32
Adam
And how long ago did you undergo the operation?
40:35
Drew
Actually, I'm a pre-op.
40:36
Adam
Oh, everyone's pre-op. I'm pre-op. So is Rizzo's Bruce, technically. I mean, we still have our penises, don't we?
40:45
Drew
Yeah, but you're not women.
40:47
Adam
Wendy, well, you're not either. You got a penis.
40:49
Drew
Well, actually, I've spent a lot of time convincing several psychologists, the psychiatrist and a surgeon that I am a woman.
40:56
Adam
Yeah, but a woman with a penis makes you a man.
41:01
Drew
Okay.
41:01
Adam
Well, Naomi, you're arguing with someone that's very concrete. Thank you. I rarely get a compliment from Bruce, but thank you for that. When do you have the operation?
41:12
Drew
That's really not the point. I don't know yet. Whenever I get the money saved up.
41:16
Adam
How much is it these days?
41:17
Drew
It's about $15,000, give or take.
41:20
Adam
$15,000?
41:21
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You want to pay $15,000?
41:23
Adam
I would think it's more than that. What does the $15,000 get you?
41:29
Drew
Well, it should get you working plumbing and electricity, so to speak.
41:34
Adam
Right, but no sofa drapes?
41:38
Drew
No, an unfurnished vagina is what it gets you.
41:40
Adam
Yeah, I see. Unfurnished vagina.
41:43
Drew
Yeah.
41:44
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Gee whiz, man.
41:45
Adam
That's going to be the name of my next book. Unfurnished vagina. And so they'll cut the penis off, and they'll work. How do they form the clitoris?
41:56
Drew
Well, it's supposed to be some sort of hocus-pocus with your nerve endings. I'm not really sure the exact medical procedure they go through because I'm not a surgeon and I haven't studied it. But they promised to give you a full working clitoris and vagina.
42:11
Adam
Hey, Naomi.
42:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
So will you get pregnant?
42:13
Adam
No, he shouldn't. No, no, please. Let me explain something. Naomi.
42:18
Drew
Yes.
42:18
Adam
Let me try to talk you out of this for a second.
42:20
Drew
All right.
42:20
Adam
Here's the deal. You still technically have your penis, right?
42:25
Drew
Yes.
42:25
Adam
Yes. Now, just hear me out. You take that 15 grand, you buy yourself a members-only jacket and a Camaro, and you start acting like a man. You understand?
42:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
That's what you do.
42:37
Adam
You buy a 12-pack of beer, a leather members-only jacket, and a Trans Am, and you're on your way. You'll be enjoying yourself as a man with that Trans Am.
42:46
Drew
The person that knows who they are and does what they're good at and what they're meant to do is a wise person.
42:51
Adam
Adam's a founding member of the Penile Preservation Society. That's not going to change. If you have a penis physically, you are a man to him. Hey, will you send me your penis when they cut it off? I love schlong. I'm going to hang it for my rear view.
43:05
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You are so gay.
43:06
Adam
I'm going to use it to signal when I turn. Hey, so Naomi.
43:11
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yes.
43:13
Adam
So, are you getting the estrogen and all that?
43:15
Drew
Yeah, that's actually my question was actually kind of a boring medical question about quitting smoking and possible side effects without interacting with the medication that I'm on.
43:26
Adam
Where the hell do you work, by the way?
43:28
Drew
I'm unemployed right now.
43:29
Adam
What a surprise.
43:30
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I could get $15,000 from you.
43:32
Adam
How are you going to save that kind of money for unemployed?
43:36
Drew
Well, let's see, there's crime, there's prostitution, or I could get a real job, which I'm working on doing, but it is tough getting hired when you're...
43:44
Adam
Let me explain. Prostitution with a penis don't pay that well.
43:48
Drew
I'm kidding.
43:49
Adam
Okay.
43:50
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Do you have parents?
43:52
Adam
Do you have parents?
43:54
Drew
Yes.
43:54
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What do they think of this?
43:55
Drew
Last time I checked, everyone has parents.
43:57
Adam
Do you talk to them?
43:59
Drew
Yeah. They're actually remarkably cool with all this.
44:01
Adam
And can they french you the dough?
44:04
Drew
No. No, they're not that well-off.
44:06
Adam
What a surprise. And...
44:09
Drew
Not that supportive.
44:11
Adam
Right, right.
44:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
So, do you have any brothers or sisters?
44:14
Drew
Yeah, I have one sister.
44:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
So, you're going to tell your father is going to have no sons now?
44:19
Drew
No, my father never really had any sons.
44:22
Adam
Couldn't you borrow your sister's vagina for the weekends or something?
44:26
Drew
No, if it was that easy.
44:29
Adam
Do they have any medical problems?
44:31
Drew
No, not really.
44:33
Adam
The big problem with smoking is smoking and taking estrogens because it increases your risk of everything, heart disease, blood clots. Stopping is not appreciably going to affect the consequences of taking the primary. Hold on Naomi, because we got to go to break. Hold on. Hang on. Listen, if I knew my penis was going to leave me anytime now, I would be masturbating non-stop around the clock. I would never let go of my penis. Could you imagine having that thing cut off? I could not imagine you coming in here never letting go of your penis. I would if I knew it was leaving.
45:07
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right.
45:08
Adam
Rizzo is here from the Wu-Tang clan. He is promoting Ghost Dog, which is the soundtrack of the movie that he has produced, or at least scored, and we will take ourselves a quick break and we'll finish off with Hishi Naomi after this. It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Bruce. Dr. Bruce is board certified and knows all the same crap that Dr. Drew does. Phone number 1-800-L-A-V-E-1-9-1. Rizzo is here from Wu-Tang clan. Ghost Dog is the film that he has a part in, but most importantly, he scored.
45:48
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Has a soundtrack coming out April 11th.
45:51
Adam
That's right.
45:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
One of Razor Shock's Sony records.
45:54
Adam
And the movie will be released nationwide on March 17th.
45:58
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
March 17th. It's very enlightening. Go see it, pick up a little knowledge, a little education.
46:04
Adam
And have some fun. Forrest Whitaker is the star of it, by the way. And we'll hear something else off of that Ghost Dog soundtrack before the night is true, but until then, we'll get on the phones. Tina?
46:16
Drew
Yes.
46:17
Adam
You're 24? Wait, hold on a second. I forgot about Naomi. Naomi?
46:22
Drew
Yeah.
46:22
Adam
All right, so anyway, we'll wrap it up with you. You're the female with the penis.
46:28
Drew
Yeah, okay.
46:29
Adam
Right, okay. That's a way to address you, right?
46:33
Drew
That's fair.
46:34
Adam
Saving up money to get it cut off.
46:37
Drew
That's really not what I was calling about, though.
46:39
Adam
Right, and you're smoking and...
46:41
Drew
Well, no, I quit smoking about a week ago, and I've been having really, really severe mood disturbance since the last couple of days. And I know that, you know, that kind of goes with the territory of quitting smoking, but they've been so intense that I wondered if the primer that I'm on or the C-Speronolactone, which I take daily, might be aggravating the condition, you know, making it worse than it normally would be. And if this is something that was going to go away, or if my body and brain adjust, or if this is just going to get worse and worse.
47:15
Adam
What about it, Bruce? On appropriate doses of Speronolactone and Premarin, and stopping smoking, things will even out, but there's a longer rocky course with irritability and other withdrawal symptoms from nicotine. I mean, nicotine is one of the most difficult drugs to stop. Irritability is a prime withdrawal symptom. It's not a byproduct of, oh, I'm irritable because I really want to smoke. It's a direct withdrawal symptom of nicotine. Isn't Premarin pregnant mare urine? Well, that's where it probably originally came from, but not. Drugs don't. Is it derived from that? I don't believe it is. I think it is. You're drinking Horse Whiz.
47:53
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What, creatine?
47:55
Adam
No, Premarin.
47:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What is creatine?
47:58
Adam
Creatine? That's something else. It's not for chicks, that's for guys. You know, think about this for a second. All these guys become women, usually mid-twenties, mid-thirties, something like that. They live in the male body for twenty-five, thirty, thirty-five years and then they become a woman. To me, they got it backwards. I would be a chick until I was about twenty-five, twenty-eight. Then, when everyone was done with me, because you know how society is, then I become a man and I become some sort of Hollywood producer and I bang young chicks until I'm sixty. That's the time to change. Be a chick until you're about thirty, then be a guy. Don't be a guy until you're thirty and then become a chick. That ain't going to work. Think about it. In situations like this, you can have the testosterone flowing, you can have the male organs, but there's probably an insensitivity in the brain to the testosterone where you're just having the expression of a female. And you become a chick and you know what you do? You get with women. That's what happens. Naomi?
49:06
Drew
Yeah.
49:07
Adam
You are going to become a female and then you're going to date a woman, right?
49:12
Drew
No.
49:13
Adam
You're going to date a man?
49:14
Drew
Yeah.
49:15
Adam
Naomi, I believe that you have the brain of a woman. How do you like that?
49:18
Drew
Thanks.
49:19
Adam
And I believe that it's probably going to end up being there's an insensitivity or the testosterone does not work in your brain the way it does in someone else's that's male morphologically. That's what you feel. But you're as much a woman as someone that has the body that Adam would be chasing after. Oh, please. That's blasphemy. You're going to hell. You'll call yourself a religious. It's a different hell than you're going to be invited to. Well, it may be slightly lower than my hell. Tina, you're 24. You don't have a penis, do you?
49:48
Drew
No. Okay.
49:50
Adam
Fantastic. What's up?
49:53
Drew
I've just caught my husband last week. He's been calling porn, like phone sex.
49:58
Adam
Yeah. How'd you catch him?
50:00
Drew
I found the credit card statement.
50:04
Adam
Yeah. More guys get popped with those credit card statements.
50:07
Drew
I know. And so I looked at him and I thought, okay, and I went back and I looked at some more and I found that he's been doing it since June. Well, I was pregnant in June.
50:14
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
50:14
Adam
Well.
50:15
Drew
I just had the baby seven weeks ago.
50:16
Adam
I see.
50:17
Drew
So I thought, okay, he's doing it because I was pregnant and, you know.
50:20
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Right.
50:20
Drew
Well, I went back today and looked at him all. He's been doing it since July of 98.
50:24
Adam
Well, listen, what did it read out on the credit card statement, by the way?
50:28
Drew
It says POR and then it says, like, a phone number and then it says, like, all these huge charges.
50:34
Adam
Right. And he didn't think you would stumble onto that?
50:36
Drew
I guess not.
50:37
Adam
What was your sex life like? Prior to that, how long were you married?
50:41
Drew
Well, last Sunday, we just got married. Last Sunday, we got married a year ago. So it was our year anniversary last Sunday.
50:46
Adam
Yeah.
50:46
Drew
Our sex life when we were engaged and we were dating was awesome.
50:50
Adam
Right.
50:50
Drew
I was like 115 pounds. I was skinny. We had sex like four or five, six times a week.
50:56
Adam
Right. Now what?
50:58
Drew
Now what?
50:58
Adam
What are you ballooned up to?
51:01
Drew
Oh, I weigh like 160.
51:02
Adam
All right.
51:03
Drew
I had just had a baby seven weeks ago.
51:05
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right. All right.
51:07
Drew
I want to know why he's doing this. Why is he doing it? Because I mean, he was doing it. He did it two days before our wedding and our sex life was awesome then.
51:13
Adam
Oh, he made the call two days before the wedding.
51:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He's a freak.
51:17
Drew
He's been doing it since July of 98.
51:19
Adam
Any family history of addictions or any chemical problems in the past or presently? Well, how many times a week does he call?
51:26
Drew
Well, there was one particular card that he called 12 times in one day.
51:30
Adam
Oh, that's a lot. My penis would come off in my hand 12 times a day. If it's more than Adam does, it's a problem if it's less, it's not.
51:36
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
But other than that...
51:37
Drew
On the call, you can tell that he was hanging up because he wasn't getting somebody to like because they were only $3 calls. But there's some calls on the credit cards that are $160.
51:46
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, okay.
51:46
Adam
Well, shut up there, Bruce, for a second, please.
51:49
Drew
$160 has to be on the phone for a very long time, right?
51:52
Adam
$160, go and buy a hooker.
51:54
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, well, at least, yeah, at least...
51:55
Drew
Don't give him any ideas.
51:56
Adam
No, okay. He's lucky he's not hanging out with me. I talk some sense in him. You buy a whore, you idiot!
52:01
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, you get two whores for that price.
52:02
Drew
Well, no, but I want to know why he... Why would he be doing this if he's getting sex at home? I don't get it.
52:07
Adam
Okay, because he has... He probably has an addiction. I agree with Bruce.
52:11
Drew
So we went to marriage council last week. We started going to marriage counseling and marriage council asked him, do you have an addiction? He said no. He swears but now he does not.
52:18
Adam
All right, you went and you talked and spoke about the phone sex.
52:22
Drew
Yep.
52:23
Adam
At the counselor. Mental note, never go to marriage counseling. Well, they'd ask you if you had an addiction. All right, he's denying it. All right, has he been able to stop?
52:32
Drew
Well, yeah, he said he hasn't done it since the baby has been born that he knows of. And then yesterday a credit card came in and there's two calls over the end of January.
52:39
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He's also a liar, huh?
52:41
Adam
And he's stupid because he keeps going back to the credit card.
52:44
Drew
Well, how else would he do it?
52:45
Adam
Well, he'd get someone... Listen, here's what I'd do. I'd get one of my buddy's credit cards. I'd use his credit card and reimburs him at the end of each month. Don't give him... Oh, okay.
52:56
Drew
I think he's asleep. He might be listening upstairs, but I'm not quite sure. All right.
52:59
Adam
Well, it's good if he is, if he is listening. Listen.
53:02
Drew
Well, he knows... Well, I promised him that this would be a debt issue. We'd stop talking about it.
53:05
Adam
Well...
53:06
Drew
Because if I can't... And he promised me he would not do it anymore.
53:10
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Right.
53:11
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
But the time...
53:12
Drew
I confronted him on February 22nd. Anything after February 22nd comes through this house.
53:17
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
There's going to be problems.
53:17
Drew
I don't know what to do.
53:18
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Well, Tina, would you rather him call a hotline, make a call sex and beat his meat to it, or would you rather go out there and cheat on you with another woman?
53:26
Drew
No, but I don't understand what he's doing.
53:27
Adam
It was a progression, and he will eventually need more stimulation. And it sounds like this is an addictive disorder, which is progressive. So he will need that eventually. He will act out in different ways sexually. Does he make enough money to afford this?
53:40
Drew
Um, yes and no. He seems to have been putting this before anything else.
53:45
Adam
Oh yeah. He's got a little addiction. Before baby food. Have you had a relative or a relationship with somebody that had an addiction problem?
53:52
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Did your father?
53:53
Adam
Yes. Any alcoholics? No. Any experience with somebody that's had this kind of behavior? Not this kind.
53:59
Drew
My husband was addicted to speed when we were dating.
54:01
Adam
Perfect. There you go. So this is a pattern, and you are a co-addict, okay? And I'm not saying, oh you've got a terrible disease and you're to blame for this. It's a balance in a relationship. He has an addictive disorder. You've been in a relationship now with a second person with an addictive disorder. You need to go to a therapist. It's not a sex therapist, but a therapist that has experience with relationships and addictions. And they'll nail this guy right away. All right. Just lay the law down. Man, this guy is the world's biggest jackass. He keeps going with the credit card. I mean, that's how you know he's got a problem. He can't cover his tracks. Right. Well, listen, I... He's probably taking, he's probably using a substance, probably some other things going on. Okay.
54:41
Drew
All right.
54:41
Adam
Theresa?
54:42
Drew
Yes?
54:43
Adam
You're 20.
54:44
Drew
Yeah.
54:44
Adam
What's up?
54:45
Drew
All right. I have a friend, and he's an intelligent guy, but he keeps, we keep having this argument where he thinks that a woman who has never given birth to a child, has never even become pregnant, can produce milk from her breast or an infant or were something to suck on them for long enough. And that's not so bad because that seems within the confines of region. Maybe you could know that there are glands there for a reason. But he also thinks that if an infant or a baby or something were to suck on a male's nipples for long enough, that the male could produce milk as well. And I'm just trying to settle the argument because I'd like to win it. And if not, I'd at least like to know who's right.
55:31
Adam
Well, first off, this is just a ploy for you to suck on his nipples. I've tried this one with the ladies. I used the same one with the penis, too. No, no, that's milk. No, don't spit that out. That's milk.
55:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I'm sure it worked.
55:43
Adam
Oh, no, listen, only if the guy has some sort of infection or something, and even then it's kind of weird and rare. Or a prolactin-producing tumor up in his brain, because prolactin will make milk come out of any breast, male or female. So if he has a prolactinoma, things can happen. But it's not a norm, it's just a logic state. So he wins on a technicality, right? No, no, no, no. He doesn't win, he loses. Men can't breastfeed, and you get sucked on a man's breast all you want, it's not going to make milk come out in a cycle like a woman's breast milk.
56:13
Drew
Good, that's what I thought.
56:14
Adam
Boy, what's this guy up to, though? What's the dynamic of having this kind of... Oh, shut up, who cares?
56:19
Drew
We talk about stuff like that.
56:20
Adam
Listen, you guys need to get cable. You really do, you guys are sitting around, waxing on hypothetically about the male breast milk. Does he think he's going to get his period any day now, too?
56:35
Drew
I don't know, I don't think that.
56:37
Adam
All right, so you win the bet. What do you win?
56:40
Drew
I don't think I win anything. He's a lot smarter than I am, so it's just a satisfaction of winning this bet.
56:45
Adam
Hold on, if he's a lot smarter than you, you need to kill yourself. And I'll help you, because I know you won't be able to figure it out yourself.
56:53
Drew
Thanks.
56:53
Adam
All right, screwball. Guys sitting around, arguing about breast milk. I think your patience for callers is dwindling. It's Thursday, it's been a long week, and I've had up to here with all of them. That's my feeling.
57:07
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Congratulations.
57:08
Adam
And you know the problem with women? Women don't bet with money. See, women just bet. I bet you're right. I bet you're wrong. I'm right, you're wrong. And then at the end of the bet, they go, see, I'm right. But they don't get anything. A man, if this was two men betting, they'd immediately put some money down. And then when you win, you got something. Guys don't even make bets without money because who cares who's right? You don't have, there's nothing to prove it. It doesn't mean anything. Women gotta gamble. They don't bet enough money when they bet. It's all pride. Jay? Jay?
57:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
57:41
Adam
You're 18. What's up?
57:43
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay. I was having unprotected sex with my girlfriend. And, um, I pulled out before I ejaculated. And then I wiped off completely and then started back again.
57:56
Adam
Well, as long as you used a clean gym sock, there shouldn't be any chance of pregnancy.
58:01
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
58:02
Adam
It's not a plunger mechanism, you idiot. All right, so you have motility. You wiped yourself down, you went back in, and then what? What'd you do? Did you wipe her down too?
58:15
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, it didn't get on her.
58:16
Adam
Where'd it go?
58:18
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It was like I pulled out and I guess it got on my hand, I don't remember.
58:22
Adam
How long ago was this?
58:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
A few days ago.
58:24
Adam
Wait a minute, what position were you in?
58:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Dragon position.
58:28
Adam
Hold on a second.
58:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Which one is it?
58:30
Adam
Dragon. It's a martial arts position. That's okay. Chinese parade.
58:36
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You need to go see Ghost Dog.
58:37
Adam
What the hell's a dragon? I do the praying mantis and the lotus, but I don't do the dragon. What's the dragon?
58:43
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It's like an evolved kind of doggy style position.
58:47
Adam
Doggy? But then what? How do you do it? She shoots a fire out of her mouth?
58:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No. She's laying down.
58:53
Adam
Is that produced poison? She lays down on her stomach?
58:55
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
58:56
Adam
Oh, so it's kind of doggy taking a nap?
58:59
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
58:59
Adam
I see. How old is she?
59:01
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
She's the same age.
59:02
Adam
And how long has she been going out?
59:04
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
A few years.
59:05
Adam
So you want to have a baby, I suspect.
59:07
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, no.
59:07
Adam
We've got to use some birth control, you retard.
59:10
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
59:10
Adam
Is it within 72 hours now or?
59:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Um, it's over.
59:14
Adam
When was it? When did that happen?
59:17
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Um, probably four days ago, I think.
59:20
Adam
Okay, so you're fit. See, that's the kind of energy you have when you're 18. Okay, baby. I wiped off. I'm coming back.
59:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Congratulations.
59:28
Adam
Yeah. My penis is... I'm going to sit this one out. No way. I can't just pop back in there like that anymore.
59:36
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay, so are the chances of pregnancy like higher?
59:38
Adam
Oh, well, yes, the chances of pregnancy. Are they higher if he went back in afterwards? That's what he's asking.
59:44
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Well, yeah.
59:46
Adam
Pushing up the sperm. They have little legs and they walk. They do. They're motile. They move. Jay, listen to me. Let's not try to figure this one out. The point is, is from here on in, from here on out, you got to do something, right? You got to get her on the pill or you got to get on the condoms or whatever.
1:00:07
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It was an isolated instrument.
1:00:09
Adam
Yeah, but what do you normally do? You normally pull out. You normally wear a condom? Would you shut up, Bruce? Especially if those half-baked, retarded remarks like pregnancy is an isolated instrument. Well, he's saying... Just quiet down. I'm talking. Jay? Jay? Everyone listen to me. There you go. Get her on the pill.
1:00:28
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
1:00:29
Adam
Okay, because this ain't going to work. Don't start the pill now. She could be pregnant? Yeah, and if she's pregnant and you take like the high dose pregnancy type substances, you can induce a few abnormalities and you have to get an abortion, so... Good. You got to go get a pregnancy test in a couple of weeks. Well, what is it? Two weeks? Yeah, a couple of weeks. Okay, Bruce. Come on. Now you're all flustered. Mike?
1:00:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Hey, how's it going?
1:00:57
Adam
You're 16.
1:00:58
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What's up, mayonnaise?
1:00:59
Adam
Hey, yeah. That's me. What's up?
1:01:03
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I kind of have to apologize. I lied to the screen here there.
1:01:06
Adam
All right.
1:01:07
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
But I have a question about like vintage porn.
1:01:11
Adam
Yeah.
1:01:11
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Like we're doing a school project and we need your comic advice on this thing we're about to throw down here. All right. We're about to do a project where like we have some chicks, they're going to like put up their dress, chill a little ankle. We're going to be like, damn woman, like you're a whore, but we need some help. It's not going to be that funny unless you throw down some stuff.
1:01:37
Adam
Well, I don't know. That sounded like a laugh riot. Yeah. Damn you whore. Well, wait a minute. What the hell kind of school do you go to?
1:01:48
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Public, man.
1:01:49
Adam
You go to a public school, and you're making a porn movie for extra credit?
1:01:53
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
For a report.
1:01:55
Adam
For a report?
1:01:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, yeah.
1:01:56
Adam
In what class is this?
1:01:58
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We're doing like US history, so it's like a decade project. I got 1890, so it's like show a little ankle there and get a laugh out of it.
1:02:08
Adam
Wait a minute. Okay. So you got 1890s is your decade?
1:02:13
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
1:02:14
Adam
And so you're going to do like an old-fashioned porn. Right. And it's going to be real tame, right?
1:02:22
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, yeah. It's going to be real tame. It's just going to be like damn whore, you know?
1:02:26
Adam
Right.
1:02:26
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It's going to show a little ankle, but that's it, you know?
1:02:28
Adam
Right.
1:02:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It is not a porn, is it?
1:02:30
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, it's not a real porn.
1:02:32
Adam
Right.
1:02:32
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It's just, you know. Right.
1:02:33
Adam
So you need a good word instead of whore.
1:02:38
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, exactly why I'm calling.
1:02:40
Adam
Strumpet. Like an 1890s word.
1:02:42
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, exactly.
1:02:43
Adam
Yeah, did you say strumpet? Yeah, I was trying to think of that. Yeah, strumpet is nice.
1:02:48
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Winch.
1:02:49
Adam
Well, winch goes back a little further.
1:02:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Parts of the Caribbean.
1:02:52
Adam
Strumpet is nice. Mike? Yeah. Call her strumpet.
1:02:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
That sounds good. That sounds really good. Any other like outtakes that we should do? Maybe like a choking thing as one of the...
1:03:05
Adam
How about spanking? Ooh, okay. What the hell are you talking about, Bruce? How long does this need to be, this movie?
1:03:11
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, as long as possible.
1:03:14
Adam
As long as possible?
1:03:15
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, yeah.
1:03:16
Adam
Well, listen, what are you talking about? What, you mean you want to do other things in the movie?
1:03:22
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Well, we just want to throw down like a little... Just to make someone laugh. You know, our class, we just don't want to do our project. Basically, we want to just, you know, lay down a video.
1:03:32
Adam
Why don't you superimpose Adam's face over one of these strumpets? Yeah, why don't you splice in some real porn if you want to get a laugh? That's extra credit.
1:03:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, right, and get my ass kicked out of here.
1:03:43
Adam
Alright, Mike, what the hell do I know?
1:03:46
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I watched the Man Show and I love it.
1:03:48
Adam
Thank you.
1:03:49
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And you're pretty funny, aren't you?
1:03:51
Adam
Alright, thanks for the ass-kissing. I'm giving you, Strumpet is the best we're going to do. Strumpet is, I don't know what era that Strumpet is from. Great word. It is a great word. It's a nice word for whore. Yeah, it minks, but that wouldn't really be a whore. It's 70s. Is it? It's like punk rock.
1:04:10
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
You sure? Not really.
1:04:12
Adam
Trollope is nice. Beotch, yes. I don't know if that's 1890s. That's more 1895, 1896. Dustin?
1:04:21
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
1:04:21
Adam
Year 17, what's up?
1:04:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, I just want to say, what's up for the Rza? I'm a big fan. You're my favorite of all, all the Wu-Tang clan.
1:04:28
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Thanks.
1:04:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
And I was wondering, any other Wu-Tang albums coming out anytime soon? Are you coming out with an album of yourself, too?
1:04:35
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We got the Ghostface Killer album out right now.
1:04:38
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah.
1:04:38
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We got this Ghost Dogg soundtrack coming out April 11th. And we're looking to drop a Wu-Tang clan album in August. So that should be something very exciting for you this summer. It's going to be so fat, fat, fat, fat, fat.
1:04:49
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, Wu-Tang is my favorite, man, so.
1:04:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
That's cool. Make sure you go check out that movie, Ghost Dogg, starring Farz Bittica, directed by Jim Jarmusch.
1:04:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
When is it coming out?
1:04:57
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Comes out March 3rd in New York and the rest, around the rest of the country.
1:05:01
Adam
17.
1:05:02
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
On March 17.
1:05:03
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
All right, cool. Adam, I just want to say you're funny, man.
1:05:08
Adam
Thanks, Dustin. Hey, is old dirty bastard still going by little baby Jesus? Or what, what did he change his name to?
1:05:16
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What's he called? Inmate 543-1231.
1:05:21
Adam
Oh, he's in the clink, yeah.
1:05:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
When's he out? Maybe be out a few more months.
1:05:28
Adam
Yeah, he should stick with the old dirty bastard while he's in, and then when he gets out, he'll go to the Jesus one again.
1:05:33
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, go back to that, man.
1:05:34
Adam
Yeah, the baby Jesus is not going to go over well when you're in the hole, in the joint that way, but he keeps that for the outside. But seriously, when does he get out?
1:05:46
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We know. A couple of months ago when he went out of the mountain.
1:05:49
Adam
What did he do this time? What did they say he did? I know he didn't do anything.
1:05:53
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah, he didn't do anything.
1:05:55
Adam
What does the man say he did?
1:05:56
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He said he was in the hotel with a girl, and she didn't agree.
1:06:04
Adam
All right. I see. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, baby Jesus. All right. Riz is here from the Wu-Tang Clan, Ghost Docs, the name of the movie. He scored the soundtrack for that. We're going to hear something off of that when we come back. Yeah, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Bruce. Filming for Dr. Drew Riz is here from the Wu-Tang Clan. Ghost Docs, the name of the movie. That is out nationwide March 17th, and the soundtrack is out when? Middle April?
1:06:38
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
April 11th.
1:06:39
Adam
April 11th.
1:06:42
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
We will come in here.
1:06:43
Adam
We will hear something off that soundtrack after we take ourselves a phone call. But first, another quick plug for the trampoline cattle call. Again, this Saturday, this Saturday, March 4th, at El Dorado East Regional Park in Long Beach. 11 o'clock, El Dorado East Regional Park in Long Beach, California. Jump on that trampoline. We'll make you a star.
1:07:10
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Kiss my ass, Adam.
1:07:11
Adam
Michelle?
1:07:12
Drew
Yeah?
1:07:13
Adam
You're 21.
1:07:14
Drew
Yeah.
1:07:15
Adam
What's up?
1:07:16
Drew
Alright, first I just want to say, you know, you guys can be so mean sometimes to people.
1:07:20
Adam
To me?
1:07:21
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Dr. Bruce?
1:07:21
Drew
All of you. All the time. I listen to you guys all the time. And you know, not all of you listeners are idiots and...
1:07:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Oh, shut up, you whore.
1:07:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Shut up!
1:07:30
Adam
Well, Drew's not mean to people. Drew's nice, although he's getting meaner by the day. I've got him on the mean streak.
1:07:36
Drew
Well, sir, I'm very disciplined and I'm not an idiot. Like, consider myself not an idiot.
1:07:39
Adam
All right, you haven't proven that yet. What's your question?
1:07:41
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Can I get better? Run?
1:07:43
Drew
All right, well, just be nice, okay?
1:07:44
Adam
Yes, go ahead.
1:07:47
Drew
All right, here's the deal. I'm 21, I have a five-year-old daughter. I'm married, we're separated. I'm straight, yet though, I have thought sometimes, you know, I can appreciate a woman's body and her beauty and everything else without doing anything. But I've had some thoughts and that's so bad to have thoughts.
1:08:09
Adam
No, that's perfectly normal.
1:08:11
Drew
It's perfectly normal.
1:08:13
Adam
Yes.
1:08:13
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
What kind of thoughts do you have? Do you have any thoughts about kissing a private part, kissing her breasts, or her doing it to you?
1:08:19
Adam
Hold on, slow down, Rza. Kissing private parts?
1:08:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Well, I can say a couple.
1:08:23
Drew
I don't know about all of it.
1:08:25
Adam
I guess so.
1:08:26
Drew
You know, about her doing to me or me doing to her. But the thing is, you know, it's like I like my guys too much. I do. I'm just, I love my guys. I can't even rub a woman's chest like a wooded guy, you know.
1:08:37
Adam
What's the story? You had a kid at age, what, 16?
1:08:39
Drew
I'm sorry?
1:08:40
Adam
You had your child at age 16?
1:08:42
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Yeah. All right.
1:08:43
Adam
You're a little chaotic, are you, Michelle?
1:08:45
Drew
No, I'm not.
1:08:46
Adam
A little bit? How old is your boyfriend?
1:08:48
Drew
My husband is 21 too.
1:08:50
Adam
Your ex-husband?
1:08:51
Drew
Well, he's going to be my ex-husband, yes. I don't have a boyfriend right now, actually. I'm just kind of like, I just moved here from Missouri.
1:08:57
Adam
Good. Where's here?
1:08:59
Drew
Huh? Washington, Vancouver.
1:09:01
Adam
People do that. We have no idea where they're calling from. Who's dad for your kid?
1:09:05
Drew
My husband, Colorado.
1:09:06
Adam
All right. Well, it sounds like you need a male figure around.
1:09:11
Drew
No, I don't need a male figure. Good.
1:09:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
No, no, no. For your child.
1:09:13
Adam
No, she's not going to get one. Hey, where was your dad when you were growing up?
1:09:18
Drew
He wasn't there.
1:09:19
Adam
What a surprise.
1:09:20
Drew
He was a very strong, very independent woman who taught me everything.
1:09:24
Adam
Okay, well, you get to be that strong independent woman, too.
1:09:28
Drew
And I am. I've been doing it for five years on my own. And I think I'm pretty good at it.
1:09:31
Adam
And do you have a boy or a girl?
1:09:33
Drew
She's a girl.
1:09:34
Adam
All right.
1:09:34
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Well, all right.
1:09:36
Drew
You know, I'm just.
1:09:37
Adam
Michelle, listen to me. Listen.
1:09:39
Drew
What?
1:09:39
Adam
Here's your number one priority.
1:09:41
Drew
What?
1:09:41
Adam
Don't let your daughter get pregnant at 15 or 16 and raise a kid alone like you and your mom.
1:09:48
Drew
Okay.
1:09:48
Adam
And the chances of that are proportional or related to.
1:09:52
Drew
I mean, that's fine.
1:09:53
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Can I finish what I was saying?
1:09:55
Adam
Oh, listen to Bruce getting out of control. It's important that you have a strong male figure. I'm not saying.
1:10:01
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Listen. Hey, hey, hey.
1:10:02
Adam
Can I finish what I'm saying? Please. I got Adam to contend with. I don't need you abusing me. You need.
1:10:07
Drew
Oh, yeah. He's been kind of mean to you, huh?
1:10:09
Adam
All right. You need a small. I'm putting her on hold. Listen, goofball. Hey, you shut. I don't have to be nice. Listen, I get paid whether I'm an A-hole or not. Now quiet down over there and let Bruce say his piece. All right. I agree. Bruce, you have eight seconds. Go. You need a strong male figure. It's no reflection on your mothering abilities. It's important for the child. Thank you.
1:10:32
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Also, let me say a few words.
1:10:34
Adam
Oh, wait a minute. My risen wants to say something. Quiet down. Quiet down.
1:10:37
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Listen, girl. Listen, if you start bringing women around you, I mean, you got a daughter. The same thing is going to transcend to her. So get you a good man and maybe find somebody that's more gentle to you, that could give you more gentle sex. That's where you can appreciate it in a gentle way.
1:10:56
Adam
There you go. That's what I like. Not the gentle sex, but the good advice from Rza. All right, we will now repay Rza for that beautiful advice by hearing something off of his soundtrack. Ghost Dog is the name of the film, and this one is called Samurai Showdown. That would be Samurai Showdown off the Ghost Dog soundtrack. Rza from the Wu-Tang Clan is our guest tonight.
1:11:27
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Nice gong.
1:11:28
Adam
And up back on the phone to speak to Cat, who's 20. Cat?
1:11:34
Drew
Hello.
1:11:35
Adam
You're 20, what's going on?
1:11:37
Drew
Well, okay. Well, first of all, I want to say hi to you Adam, and hi Dr. Bruce.
1:11:43
Adam
Hi.
1:11:44
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Hi, Rza, please, too.
1:11:47
Drew
Okay, hi, but there's only one thing. I don't really know who you are.
1:11:51
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
That's okay.
1:11:52
Adam
We heard of the Wu-Tang.
1:11:54
Drew
Well, I have, but see, I don't want them to...
1:11:56
Adam
Oh, shut up. Who cares? You bitch!
1:11:59
Drew
But hi.
1:12:00
Adam
All right, good. What do you want?
1:12:02
Drew
Okay, well, my boyfriend broke up with me because he says I gained too much weight from when we got together.
1:12:08
Adam
You're fat. Drew, please.
1:12:10
Drew
I'm not fat.
1:12:11
Adam
How much weight did you gain?
1:12:12
Drew
I gained 15 pounds.
1:12:14
Adam
And you're three feet tall?
1:12:16
Drew
No.
1:12:16
Adam
No, how tall are you?
1:12:18
Drew
I'm 5'7.
1:12:19
Adam
You're overweight. Drew, please. How much does he weigh? What did you weigh when you met him?
1:12:23
Drew
100 pounds.
1:12:25
Adam
You weighed 100 pounds when you met him? She's had to even know where you were.
1:12:29
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Now you weigh 115 pounds?
1:12:31
Drew
Yeah.
1:12:31
Adam
And you're how tall again?
1:12:33
Drew
5'7.
1:12:35
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He says you're fat. 5'7?
1:12:37
Drew
He said my ass got big.
1:12:39
Adam
5'7? The guy's a loser. First off, you must have an eating disorder to be 5'7 and 100 pounds.
1:12:46
Drew
Oh, yeah.
1:12:47
Adam
Okay. And now?
1:12:50
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
He says your ass got bigger?
1:12:51
Drew
Yeah.
1:12:52
Adam
No.
1:12:52
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Is it bigger than better? To me, it's bigger than better.
1:12:55
Adam
Listen, I wish I was black for that one reason, that I loved a big ass. Black guys love big ass and they're smart. They're smart, too, but white guys can't get on board with that. And I'm a white guy and I can't get on board with a big ass, but I wish I could.
1:13:12
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
It makes the doggy style much more doggy.
1:13:15
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
I know.
1:13:17
Adam
It's like humping a St. Bernard. So, Cat, did you have an eating disorder? Oh, yeah.
1:13:22
Drew
Yeah, I have one.
1:13:23
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Okay.
1:13:24
Adam
All right. So I don't trust this guy. He's a screwball.
1:13:28
Drew
Well, I know, but it's just like, because a lot of crap happened in my life.
1:13:32
Adam
I know.
1:13:33
Drew
And it's just like, it made me feel so bad because, like, my self esteem went so way down.
1:13:38
Adam
I know. But listen, Cat, listen to me. As you know, I'm a genius. Okay. You weighed 100 pounds, then you got up to 115 at 5'7. You should put on another 15, 20 pounds. Don't let this guy send you into a spiral and get you down to 98 pounds again so you die. Do you hear me? You need to work on your eating disorder. You need therapy. This is a life-threatening illness. You're going to screw yourself up. This guy's an idiot. You know that. And don't let it send you to the vomitorium. All right?
1:14:14
Drew
Well, I have another question.
1:14:15
Adam
Thank you. That's enough. What's the next question?
1:14:18
Drew
Okay. Well, I was molested when I was four, and then I was molested again when I was nine, and then I was raped when I was 13, and then I was raped again when I was 18.
1:14:27
Adam
All right. So, you're doing about, what, 18 months?
1:14:31
Drew
That's what I was thinking, like, is the pattern going to keep repeating throughout my life?
1:14:35
Adam
It will, unless you get some therapy and look into it and stop the pattern. You're the only one who can stop the pattern. Have you gotten therapy? Have you gone to some...
1:14:46
Drew
Yeah, I've went through, like, three different psychologists in the house.
1:14:49
Adam
Yeah, but listen, you need to find someone...
1:14:52
Drew
All they do is put me on medication.
1:14:53
Adam
Well, you need to find someone you can talk to and someone you can start that process with. You need to go on walks and read some books and find Jesus Christ and stop vomiting and don't trust any man you meet. Translation, good therapist, stability in your life. Yes. You know, you may not be a genius, but you're a parrot. You're a good parrot, what Drew says. Parrot. Are you kidding? I taught that idiot everything he knows.
1:15:18
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Go see Ghost Dog.
1:15:19
Adam
Yeah, go see Ghost Dog. Everything will come into focus. We have a lot of people listening to show their life is, you know what it's like? It's like they've been looking through glasses with the wrong prescription. And after you see Ghost Dog, it's gonna like you had, it's like you had the laser surgery on your corneas. Everything magically is gonna come into focus. Every riddle in life will make sense after you see Ghost Dog.
1:15:42
Rza w/ Dr. Bruce
Wow.
1:15:44
Adam
All right. Riz is here from the Wu-Tang Clan. Ghost Dog is the name of his latest movie that he scored. That's out March 17th. We'll take a little break. When we come back, we'll speak to Chris, who's 31, lost interest in sex, wants to know what's up. We'll tell her or him after this. Well, now.