Episode 1000754887250

4:26 Adam That is Drew. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. It's Loveline. Dr. Drew's a board certified physician. Adam, an addiction medicine specialist, and why do I sound strange on this mic?

4:38 Drew It sounds strange to me too, but it sounds kind of good. Strangely good, so.

4:42 Adam Oh, we're on different mics?

4:43 Drew Yeah.

4:44 Adam Oh, okay.

4:45 Drew Then we normally use?

4:46 Adam Yeah.

4:47 Drew Am I using Adam's mic?

4:48 Adam Let me explain the definition of different.

4:50 Drew Older.

4:51 Adam No, ones you don't normally use.

4:54 Drew Hey, I mean, we could each be on each other's mics. That would be different. It's possible, see? That's what I was asking.

5:00 Adam Well, whatever it is, it's not what we normally do.

5:03 Drew These are different mics I've ever seen in the room.

5:04 Adam Is there any method to your madness, Anderson?

5:10 Yeah, the ones that you usually use just weren't working tonight. Oh, OK. That's pretty clear logic.

5:16 Adam This is going to take a little getting used to. I'm going to have to try to figure this out.

5:20 Drew All right, let's go.

5:21 Adam Let me talk into your mic for a second. Let me see how that is. Let's see, should I talk masturbatory junk? Yeah, that's weird.

5:29 Drew All right. I like it.

5:30 Adam Really?

5:31 Drew It's the mellow you.

5:33 Adam I'm distracted.

5:34 Drew I got to tell you. Oh, my God. You know, I got to share with you, Adam is an awful cold and he was, we sat side by side through how many hours of television today. Well, Adam tried not to hock up a loogie.

5:45 Adam Wasn't easy. Was not easy.

5:47 Drew Tonight, I'm sure Dazzle has a few performances, but I gave you some decongestant history. I thought to myself, oh man, is this going to make his thinking off? Is this going to make him weird?

5:55 Adam Did it? Drew, I don't know if you know this about me, but stuff does not really affect me. Vicodin washed down with red wine, nothing. Nothing. The sleeping pills, nothing. Nothing. Stuff does not affect me. I wish it did. God damn, I wish it did. I really do. I'm jealous of those people who say, oh yeah, one shot of Nyquil, I don't even know where I am. I mean, I'll pass out there and drop the Nyquil bottle out of my hand and just hit my head on the floor. They think that's some sort of liability. For me, I'm envious. I'm like, Jesus Christ, you spend five bucks, you take a shot of Nyquil, you're out for the night? Anderson, do we have any other mics? This don't sound right.

6:43 Drew I like it. Come on, nice deep quality of your voice.

6:47 Adam Nice. No, no, something's up. Something's different.

6:49 Drew Well, it's also that nasal congestion. You sound pretty changed, man.

6:51 Adam You sound better. Anderson. I don't care. It's distracting, man. Carrie?

6:56 Yes.

6:57 Adam You're 24. Are the other mics broken, Anderson? Is that what the deal is?

7:02 Drew Carrie, what's going on?

7:04 I'm having a problem. I'm 24 years old and my husband is 33 years old. I got married when I was 21.

7:12 The problem is we don't have a lot in common.

7:15 I also work in a nightclub. I'm very attractive and at this nightclub I get picked up a lot by a lot of different kinds of guys. I really didn't have a chance to date around much, I'd say. Why?

7:27 Drew Why did that happen?

7:28 I don't know. I guess I just met him. I had dates and stuff but nothing serious. He was my first serious boyfriend.

7:36 Drew How did you meet him?

7:38 Kind of through friends.

7:39 Drew How old is he?

7:41 33.

7:41 Adam Do you have any kids?

7:42 No.

7:44 Adam And you've been married for three years?

7:47 Yeah.

7:48 Adam You kind of feel like you're at the end?

7:50 Kind of, yeah.

7:51 Adam What do you think his take on it is?

7:53 I don't know. I mean he doesn't seem like he's happy either but I think that he's trying to keep it together.

7:59 Adam Yeah.

8:00 Drew Well, maybe it is the end.

8:02 Adam Well, I don't know. How do you talk to someone who got married very young, they've been married for three years, they don't have any kids and they're saying, hey, you know what, it ain't out of my system.

8:13 Drew Yeah.

8:13 Adam I want to have a few dates, travel around a little, have a romp here and there.

8:17 Drew Much better they should admit that than try to fix it by having a kid.

8:20 Right.

8:21 Drew And then realize six years later, they really can't hang with it.

8:23 Right.

8:24 Adam So.

8:25 Drew So it's interesting. I've never really thought about this as clearly, but you and I have a clear issue about commitment in that the commitment really must be honored if there's somebody else involved like a kid.

8:36 Adam Well, if you look at it, if you take it from the approach that there's no by-product of the marriage, it's just me and it's you.

8:44 Drew And we agree not to.

8:44 Adam We agree that, hey, I'm getting a little tired of you and maybe you're a little tired of me, and there's this chick I want to see and there's this guy you want to see. All right. Well, no harm. I mean, you're both happy. Fine. No one's hurt.

8:56 Drew You're kind of right. I mean, there is the whole issue of how easy it is for people to do that and the whole issue of commitment and trying to struggle through relationships and whatnot. But if they were too young and the relationship wasn't quite right anyway, and there were other issues here, so.

9:07 Adam Fine. Rusty, break it up. You're 24.

9:11 Caller 25.

9:12 Adam 25, I mean.

9:13 Caller Yes.

9:14 Caller Well, this question is something I've been too embarrassed to ask my doctor about. I am stopped from having an orgasm by the urge to go to the bathroom, the urge to pee, really overwhelming.

9:28 Drew Have you had an orgasm ever?

9:30 Caller I think only two, and I peed both times.

9:33 Drew Yes. There is something called female orgasmic incontinence.

9:36 Adam Oh baby.

9:36 Drew And I don't know of any treatment for that. It's interesting. There are medications that are designed to hold urine in, like Dittropan and Detrol, these things that help women with incontinence. I've never heard of it being used for orgasmic incontinence, but I suppose they could. Generally though, this is the kind of thing that is just something you do. It's just you. And a guy is not going to be particularly, as long as he sort of has a good warning about it.

10:02 Adam What about when you're alone?

10:04 Caller Yes, especially.

10:05 Drew She pees.

10:06 Caller Yes.

10:06 But I don't know.

10:08 Caller I'm not sure. I see also, even though I'm 25, orgasms are something that's new to me, I think. I thought, when I was younger, I thought I was having them, but I recently discovered I don't think I was. And so I don't know. It's just an odd thing.

10:25 It's just a thing that you've never heard.

10:26 Adam Do you have a boyfriend?

10:27 Caller Married, actually.

10:28 Drew What do you say, Rusty? What did you say? If we've ever heard of it?

10:31 Caller Yes. Well, I mean, it sounds like that you've never really heard of anything like that, like you said.

10:35 Drew Wait a minute. I just went through a whole thing. I told you it has a name. We hear about it all the time. Oh, okay, okay, okay. And what I had not heard about was some of the medications we use for incontinence, whether those possibly would be effective here. But it's necessarily irrelevant because guys aren't really bothered by this.

10:50 Adam Well, some guys aren't.

10:51 Drew We hear about it all the time.

10:52 Adam Frankly, for me, you'd get a little old.

10:54 Drew You should do it every time.

10:55 Adam I don't want to give you a complex, but I don't want to get whizzed on every time I give someone an orgasm.

10:59 Caller I wouldn't want that. I don't like it myself, accurately.

11:01 Adam Yeah, guys have a higher threshold for that kind of pain.

11:04 Yeah.

11:05 Adam Hey, marry a French guy.

11:07 Oh.

11:08 Adam In France, it's a compliment to urinate on your partner.

11:11 Caller Oh, great. Well, I might have to do that.

11:13 Adam Pick up an extra couple of bucks. What... you got to get in a position that's sort of non-offensive.

11:19 Drew Right, not...

11:21 Adam Oral sex is tough.

11:22 Caller Yeah.

11:23 Adam And you being on top's a bitch.

11:26 Caller Yeah.

11:27 Adam But I think I could work with doggy. We'll put one of those garage pans under you. Like, you know, when dad's... Dad drives like a 66 Futura and the transmission's leaking. And mom's raising a piss about it because it's ruining the garage floor.

11:43 Drew Raising a piss?

11:44 Adam I just made that up. Kind of English, isn't it? So you put the pan right under the bed there, right on top. All right, Rusty, why don't you come clean with your husband?

11:54 Drew Yeah, that's what you gotta do.

11:56 Caller Okay.

11:57 Drew He'll be all right.

11:58 Adam He'll handle it.

11:59 Caller Okay.

12:00 Drew He will.

12:00 Caller I don't know. I wouldn't if I was him.

12:03 Drew What's he gonna do, leave you? What are the grounds to divorce her? Wife keeps peeing on me.

12:08 Adam Look at my shoes, your honor.

12:11 Drew Come on.

12:12 Adam Anderson, seriously, go find a new mic. This is bothersome. It really is bothersome.

12:16 Drew What is it?

12:17 Adam I don't know. I don't know what the tone is. I don't know what the quality is. It's improved. It's bothering me.

12:23 Drew It's better. Maybe it's the headphones.

12:26 Adam No.

12:29 Drew How can you help?

12:29 Adam What happened to the other mics? Did they break?

12:33 Drew Why can't you?

12:33 It's the same mics.

12:34 Caller I just have them in different ports because your ports were messed up.

12:36 Sugar got in it, I think, from Bruce.

12:39 Adam Jesus Christ. The ports are messed up. Oh, I'm plugged into different jacks.

12:44 Drew That's what's doing it.

12:45 Adam Let me try plugging it back into my jack. All right, keep talking there, Drew. Is this my jack here?

12:51 Drew Yeah, we're going to go to the next call, which is Allison 20, Allison.

12:53 Adam When are these Westwood Two people going to get off their fat asses and redo this goddamn console? It's pathetic. It's embarrassing. Did they listen to this show? There's something going wrong every night. God, I mean, it's humiliating. Aren't they embarrassed? Where's their dignity? Do they want me bitching about them on a nightly basis? They got to sink a hundred bucks into something once a year. This console's been a piece of ass since I got here. It needs to be redone. They're not going to do that? What the hell's wrong with those people? It's zero dignity. Just zero. Maybe they like it. Maybe they're sadists or something. What the F is wrong with those idiots? God damn. I'm telling you, everybody, invest your money in Westwood One. You get every penny back. They will not put a penny into anything here.

13:44 Drew Allison?

13:45 Adam Yes.

13:45 Drew What's going on?

13:47 Caller I've been with my boyfriend for two and a half years.

13:50 Adam Oh, yeah.

13:51 Caller I'm better. The first year, both of us are very sexual, and the first year was fine. But after that, the stereotypical married couple type thing, it drifts off, the woman loses her libido, and that's basically exactly what's happening.

14:13 Drew How is this stereotypical?

14:15 Caller Well, it's not stereotypical. It's just you hear it on the radio, and that's just the radio, but no.

14:22 Drew That what? Women lose their libido?

14:27 Caller No, it's just the media influence.

14:30 Adam Oh, boy. Forget about the media. Hey, Allison, most women get hornier as they get older. As the years wear on, so I don't know what you're talking about.

14:37 Caller Okay.

14:38 Adam So why don't you just tell us your problem?

14:41 Caller Well, it's just that I've lost my libido.

14:43 Drew Well, that usually means you've lost your connection with your husband.

14:46 Caller He's not my husband. He's just my boyfriend.

14:48 Your boyfriend.

14:49 Drew Or is that you're on medication or something?

14:52 Caller I was.

14:53 Drew What medicine?

14:55 Caller I was on Zoloft and Depakote because I'm manic depressive.

14:59 Drew All right. So depression can make you lose your libido.

15:02 Caller I understand that completely.

15:03 Drew Zoloft can make you lose your libido.

15:05 Caller Depakote can do that too.

15:06 Drew Yeah, to some extent.

15:07 Adam Do you hear about that on the radio?

15:10 Caller Yeah. Oh, I know that.

15:11 Adam Okay.

15:12 Caller But, I mean, it's been a while and they've changed my medicine and I'm not really on the medicine anymore. And so I don't think it's been carried over for like...

15:28 Adam Well, there it is.

15:28 Drew Well, you're probably depressed, right?

15:33 Caller Not like situationally depressed, no. So manic depressive, yes.

15:38 Drew And depressed, in the depressed phase of manic depression.

15:41 Caller No, I'm not in the depressed phase of it. I haven't been in a very long time.

15:45 Drew Okay.

15:45 Caller Thankfully.

15:46 Drew And how's the relationship going?

15:48 Caller Absolutely wonderful.

15:50 Hmm.

15:51 It's just that I...

15:54 Adam Well, is he complaining?

15:55 Caller It seems like a chore.

15:57 Adam Well, it is a little bit of a chore. Let's be honest.

15:59 Caller He complains and I complain.

16:03 Adam What's going on back there?

16:05 Caller I'm sorry?

16:06 Adam What's going on in the background?

16:08 Drew That was Anderson. Oh.

16:10 Adam I didn't know what that was.

16:12 Caller All right.

16:12 Adam Listen, Allison.

16:13 Caller Yes.

16:14 Adam Why don't you let him hump you every once in a while? How bad could it be?

16:18 Caller You love the guy, right?

16:20 Caller Yes, I do. And it just seems a little overbearing, but you know, that's just my perspective. That's my...

16:26 Drew Allison, there's a reason your libido is dropping off. Either it's some depressed phase or manic depression or a gut or something related to medication or some residual effect or something with the relationship. That's where you gotta look. It's nothing to do with things drifting off magically.

16:40 Adam Let me float one of my common theories here. Folks, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, committed people, people love their partners, go ahead and put out every once in a while when you're not in the mood. It ain't the end of the world. You know what I'm saying?

16:57 Drew Men and women.

16:58 Men and women.

16:59 Adam Hey, once in a while a guy's tired, the woman's horny, go ahead and put out. You know what I'm saying? You're not raping anybody. You're not stealing anyone's innocence. You're with this person. You've been with them. You've had sex many a time. Some of it's going to be better. Maybe this ain't going to be the best time. But your partner's a little worked up.

17:18 Go ahead and put out.

17:20 Adam That's all. Especially women. Just hold still. That's what I mean.

17:26 Drew Especially women.

17:27 Adam What do you got to do? Just be there. Just hold still. If the guy a little oral sex, he gives you a little oral sex, you have a little sex, that's it. You watch TV. You don't always, you know, doesn't have, you don't have to follow a trail of rose petals to the tub with the candles around it every night. You're depressed. Your husband's getting pissed off. Your boyfriend's getting pissed off. Just hold still. That's what I'm saying. Why does everything have to be so optimal all the time? And why is it such a, oh, it's such an attack when you say it that way. Oh, it's so humiliating. You've boffed this person 1500 times already. Now you've got a few beers in you and you're extra horny tonight. They're feeling a little tired. Hey, hold still. That's all. That's fine. Think of all the other junk you do that you don't really want to do for your mate. This is just one more thing. You don't have to do it every night. Maybe there'll be a time next week when you're in the mood and he's not. And then he can hold still.

18:22 Caller Josh?

18:24 Yeah.

18:24 Adam You're 21.

18:25 Caller Yes, sir.

18:26 Adam What's going on?

18:27 Caller Well, actually, I don't know.

18:30 Caller I'm kind of nervous now.

18:31 But it was me and my girlfriend.

18:34 Caller We were, you know, pulling around.

18:36 And we've been together for a while.

18:37 Adam Hey, Josh.

18:38 Caller Yeah.

18:39 Adam You can't use the S word, you jackass.

18:41 Did I?

18:42 Adam Jesus, you stoner. I don't even know where they are.

18:45 OK.

18:46 Adam All right.

18:46 I'll try not to touch them anymore.

18:48 Caller Well, actually, to start off, we were pulling around and stuff. We've been together for like a month, OK? And we started pulling around and then she, um, oh, man, or anyhow.

19:01 Adam Hey, Josh, you got to turn your radio down.

19:04 Caller Turn the radio down?

19:05 Caller OK.

19:06 Caller Jesus Christ.

19:07 Adam I'll screw you.

19:08 Drew Whoop. You just hung up on him.

19:09 Adam No, I didn't mean to hang up. Did you? You told him to turn the radio down. Yeah, he's stoned. I mean, that's fine. He snoozed you loose. Chris?

19:18 Yeah.

19:19 Adam You're 26.

19:20 Caller Hey, how you doing, Adam? Good.

19:22 How you doing, Dr. Drew?

19:23 Drew Chris?

19:24 Caller I'm all right.

19:26 I have a problem. Since I've, I don't know, since things are getting older, I can't seem to get laid like I used to.

19:35 Caller Yeah.

19:36 Adam It's tough. You gotta get a TV show. You gotta start a band or something.

19:41 I know, right?

19:42 Caller Yeah.

19:44 I don't know. I mean, I don't understand if it's, I might, I don't know. It's just like, is this normal? I mean, do you go to like a certain point where just like, you know.

19:53 Adam Well, here's the deal.

19:55 Caller Yeah.

19:56 Adam Some guys get laid more as they get older. Some guys get laid less. And it sort of depends what your station is.

20:04 Caller Well, when I was younger, I mean, it was so easy. I was like.

20:07 Adam Yeah, sure. You're on the football team. You're popular in high school or whatever it is. And that's why you got laid.

20:12 Caller Yeah.

20:13 Adam Now you're working for your cousin's laundry, dry cleaning place.

20:18 Caller I don't think so.

20:19 Adam Where are you working?

20:20 Caller Me?

20:21 I work for pharmaceutical.

20:24 Caller All right.

20:24 Adam But you're not driving a Mercedes and raking in the big box.

20:28 Caller Yes, I am.

20:28 Adam You are?

20:29 Caller Yeah.

20:29 Adam Well, you got no excuse. You must've got fat then.

20:32 Caller Well, I got a little chubby.

20:36 Adam I'll tell you, that slows women down. That husky thing? That'll slow them down. Well, you know, you're always talking about women getting chunky. Guys get chunky. They don't get laid either.

20:47 Caller Yeah, but I mean, it's just like it just like happened in the last like two years.

20:51 Adam Well, you're not.

20:52 Drew Chris, where do you work?

20:53 Adam Pharmaceutical.

20:54 Drew No, what do you work?

20:56 Caller For a pharmaceutical company.

20:57 Drew What do you do for them?

20:59 Caller I'm a director of security.

21:01 Adam You ain't getting rich on that job. Come on.

21:05 Caller I make a living.

21:06 Adam What do you make?

21:08 Caller Um, about 50, 60 a year.

21:14 Adam Listen, you don't know how much you make?

21:18 Caller I don't want to say it. Okay.

21:19 Adam All right. I'm going to go with 40. But listen, do they give you a mace container or do they give you a gun?

21:25 Caller No, I carry a gun.

21:26 Adam All right. You should be able to get some women just with that. All right. Chris?

21:31 Caller Yeah.

21:31 Adam You got to lose that spare tire around your gut. And you got to shave that bad moustache off. It's not becoming.

21:38 Caller I don't have a moustache.

21:39 Adam Good. You're overweight. Thank God you shaved that thing off. You did have a moustache, didn't you?

21:44 Caller No.

21:44 Adam Wow. You just sounds like a moustache guy. What's that?

21:47 Caller I look like I'm 19.

21:49 Drew Good. Well, you kind of talk like it, too. Maybe that's part of what's happening here.

21:53 Adam Well, where were you getting laid two years ago, Chris?

21:57 Caller I'm sorry?

21:57 Adam Where were you getting laid two years ago?

22:01 Drew Where? How was it happening two years ago as opposed to now?

22:06 Caller I mean, we just, you know, whatever. I was going out with my girlfriend at the time, but before that, it was just nothing. I'd go out, you know, whatever, and just hook up, and that's it. Sometimes it would be the same night.

22:20 All right.

22:20 Caller I mean, just tonight, I went out, and I mean, my standards are going low now, because I'm like, you know, and desperate, and nothing happened.

22:29 All right.

22:30 Adam Well, listen, you had an off night. You're having a bad year, that's all.

22:33 Caller You think so?

22:34 Adam Yeah, I think you'll be back in 2000. Listen, lose that extra weight, and get out there and make the scene. I don't know what to say. Women, there's a certain point, when you get a little bit older, where women don't buy, they don't buy the wrap anymore. You have to actually have credentials. You know what I'm saying?

22:56 Drew Right.

22:56 Adam There's a point when you're like...

22:58 Drew When they wise up. Women wise up.

23:00 Adam Yeah. I mean, Drew, tell me if you can identify with this at all. But there's a point with guys from like maybe high school, you know, senior in high school, like 18, to like 25, 26, where everyone's open to everyone.

23:14 Drew Yeah.

23:15 Adam I mean, if you're a guy and you're 22 and you got a good wrap, you could live on the beach. You could drive a VW Squareback that's worth 400 bucks. Still meet plenty of chicks. And good-looking ones and whatever. College chicks, business, whatever. You can do it.

23:32 Drew It starts to sort out.

23:33 Adam As you start to get a little bit older, you got to be kind of doing a little something in order to really bag the big game. Right?

23:41 Drew Right.

23:42 Adam And I think Chris is getting a little bit older. And he needs to kind of work a little less on his wrap and a little more on his game.

23:49 Drew His life, right?

23:50 Adam Right. That's what it is. Listen, guys, I swear I'm right about this. Forget about your wrap. Forget about talking women in anything. Just every second that you dedicate. This is an interesting concept. Every second that you dedicate to your work or your career, school, education, whatever, all this sort of extraneous stuff, the gym, the Catholic Big Brother program, whatever it is. Every second you invest in that is like a second invested in picking up chicks because it becomes part of your overall picture. Now, the guys who sit home, The rap sheet. Yeah, the guys who hang out on their sofa and try to come up with a good rap to pick up women, that starts to wear out and it doesn't work after a while. So it's win-win. You invest time in your career, whatever, you make money and you get the chicks. That's what we should all do.

24:45 Drew That's evolution. It's evolution in progress, huh?

24:47 Adam Thank you. All right, Drew.

24:49 Drew Is it?

24:50 Adam What the hell was that?

24:51 Drew I don't know. It seems somebody.

24:52 Adam Oh, that was evolution in progress.

24:54 Drew Anybody there? What's your name?

24:56 Caller Sean.

24:56 Drew Sean, what's going on?

24:58 Caller Not much. I'm just having some problems with my stepmom.

25:02 Drew What's the matter?

25:03 Caller Yeah. Well, my dad just actually just remarried, and this is like probably about a month ago. I've been seeing Sean for about a year now, and I'm having a rough time because he seems finally happy in that, but I like...

25:18 Drew But you're not.

25:19 Caller Well, it's not me. I'll be like... She's always flirting with me and that kind of stuff. I'll be up in my room and watching TV or whatever, and she'll come in and I'll act like I'm asleep and stuff, but she totally comes in, starts touching me. I don't know what to do. I'm like, my dad, he seems happy, and I don't want to break his heart.

25:38 Drew He starts touching you?

25:40 Caller She's like, she'll start touching me and stuff. I pretend like I'm asleep because I'm embarrassed. I'm scared. I don't know what to do. I don't want to be kicked out of my house.

25:48 Drew We had this once before, remember?

25:49 Adam The exact same call.

25:50 Drew Yeah, except he told his dad that dad beat the crap out of him. Remember that?

25:54 Adam Yeah, so you should tell your dad.

25:56 Drew So what we finally did, that was stand up to the woman. Remember? He said, they cut this crap out or I'm going to tell my dad.

26:02 Adam Hey, Sean.

26:03 Caller Yeah.

26:04 Adam Why don't you just kind of tell her, hey, this is out of line? You don't have to say much.

26:09 Caller Well, yeah, but my dad's finally happy, you know, I mean, he's...

26:12 Adam Forget about your dad.

26:13 Drew Just deal with her.

26:15 Caller Well, I don't... But, I mean, if I say anything to him, what if I get kicked out and stuff?

26:19 Drew Don't say anything to him right now.

26:20 Adam Listen, screwball, you say something to her.

26:23 Caller Yeah.

26:24 Adam Listen, hold on a second. Drew?

26:26 Drew Yeah.

26:27 Adam I always get this feeling with young guys when there's a woman coming on to them, they kind of want to share it with everyone.

26:32 Caller Yeah.

26:32 Adam And they want to make it into more than it is. And it's a way, sometimes girls do this too, where you get the feeling if it's something they really wanted to get rid of.

26:42 Drew They have no problem.

26:43 Adam No problem. If it was some video that they wanted, if it was something that they wanted to watch, something that they want to do, some concert they wanted tickets to, you get the feeling they could take care of it. She comes in, she starts rubbing your leg. You look at her and say, hey, this ain't gonna fly. Knock it off. And then that's the only thing you say. It's done. I guarantee it's not gonna happen again. I kind of think there's a sort of intrigue, not that he's into her, but that he's making it into more than it is. You remember when you were 18 and there's some drunken screwball chick at some party or something, it was like going after you and stuff, and in a way you were pissed off about it, but another way you want to tell your buddies and make a little, draw a little tension to yourself. I think that's what's going on with Sean. Sean didn't have to get his dad involved with this. Just tell her, knock it off. She'll stop, especially if you say, listen, do it again, I tell dad. She's done. That's it. Okay, we're out. It is the Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-L-M-V-E-1-9-1. Wow, it's hard to talk with that yubbo yubbo yubbo in the background. Went to the big launch party for the drdrew.com, which is over at the Sky Bar.

28:12 Drew You can watch the party right now, it's being broadcast on drdrew.com.

28:16 Adam What is that at the, what hotel is that?

28:19 Drew Mondrian.

28:19 Adam Oh, nice, ten bucks for valet parking over there. Jesus Christ, ten bucks. Anyway, good party, a lot of folks, very fashionable, lots of beautiful people, and I gotta tell you, I just don't like people.

28:38 Drew I noticed that in my interview while I was talking about how I wanted to create connections with people and develop the sub-tite, and he goes, no, no, I want to disconnect. I don't want to be here.

28:46 Adam No, I'll tell you, to me, there's just nothing worse than, well, people are intrusive too. People like grab on your hand and go, you gotta come say hi to a friend of mine, and I go, listen, I barely like you, I'm thinking. I don't even like you, I'm thinking to myself. Come on, come on, you gotta say hi to a friend of mine, and I'm thinking, I don't remember your name, I don't really like you, and I'm leaving, and I'm talking to somebody else, and they'll just start yanking on your arm.

29:10 Drew Yeah, people do that, but you know.

29:12 Adam This whole quasi-celebrity thing, Drew, is really, it's not panning out at all. It isn't, I couldn't make it five feet at your party without some media talking to me every five seconds.

29:22 Drew You're very popular, you should feel good about that.

29:23 Adam No, I don't like it, it's uncomfortable.

29:26 Drew Well, it's so funny, it must be so uncomfortable, it's so wonderful to be able to connect with people, to be able to, but to be able to be in a position we are connecting and not like it, it's like a funny kind of purgatory.

29:37 Adam I like yapping, you know, don't get me wrong, but I just don't want to meet everybody.

29:42 Drew I see.

29:43 Adam Ralph?

29:45 Caller Ralph, R-A-F.

29:46 Adam Alright.

29:46 It's a nickname. How you guys doing? Good. Okay. Here's the deal, I'm pretty much sure that I have a problem and I want to know what to do with it, about it I should say. Basically, I'd rather check out porn, go to strip clubs, do stuff like that than a lot of other things that I should be doing in my life. For example, sleep, I'd stay up all night on the computer, check out websites, hang out with my girlfriend, things like that. Yeah.

30:19 Adam Well, here's your problem, here's your main problem. You're not whacking off early enough in the evening. I mean, here you do it.

30:28 Caller I do it a couple of times a day.

30:29 Adam All right, but here's the bottom line with that computer. It's the same with computer or porn or phone sex or whatever it is. You can have at it two minutes into it or you can have at it three hours into it. You know what I'm saying? Same result, same orgasm. The only difference is if you have at it five minutes into it, you've saved two hours and 55 minutes.

30:51 Caller And I go to bed.

30:52 Adam And you go to bed.

30:53 Caller Right.

30:54 Adam That's where the real pathology comes in, is when you just sit there with one hand on the Johnson and the other hand on the Mouse for three hours. You better just realize whatever it is you're looking at now, you'll be looking at the same thing at 2.45 in the morning. You might as well just have at it.

31:11 Caller Yeah, I know. I know what you mean.

31:12 Adam Then you just go to bed.

31:14 Caller That's all right. That's cool. I can understand. I got your point there. But I mean like...

31:17 Adam I don't even put the porn movie in anymore. I just sniff the cassette right in the pants. Good to cover.

31:23 Drew You gave some great advice tonight to somebody who wanted to be copying porn.

31:27 Adam Oh, yeah, it was funny. Somebody on the TV show today said, you know, I come home, I rent porn movies.

31:35 Drew My boyfriend.

31:36 Adam My boyfriend rents porn movies and then he dubs them. And I said, listen, to any folks that are thinking about dubbing pornography that they rent, do it before you jack off. Because after you've jacked off, that's it. You're like, yeah, I'll do it in the morning. No, you won't do it because you think you'll never jack off again after you jack off. It's like, hey, why bother dubbing this thing? I'm entering the priesthood. There's no, you just, you lose all motivation. You lose all energy. That's it. I'm telling you, you could stay out of trouble with this. If this Ralph would have himself, five minutes, Ralph, I mean, Jesus Christ, five minutes in the computer, he could go to bed. All right, Ralph.

32:24 Caller All right, man.

32:24 Adam Okay, so listen, maybe you got a problem. Are you an alcoholic?

32:28 Caller No.

32:29 Adam You're not in anything else?

32:31 Caller Nope.

32:31 Adam Your family, alcoholics?

32:33 Caller Uh, my father was. He's, uh, well, recovering, but, you know, he's been clean for, like, 15 years.

32:42 Drew That's a good pick up, Adam.

32:43 Adam Yeah, you got a little of that sexual compulsive thing going.

32:45 Drew Yeah.

32:46 Adam Why don't you try SA.?

32:49 Caller You think so?

32:49 Drew He's not going to get to that point?

32:50 Adam No. Well, I'll tell you what. I'll make a deal with you.

32:53 Drew It's going to get to that point, so watch. Watch what happens.

32:55 Adam Well, why don't you just try to slow it down?

32:58 Drew Let me, uh, if you can.

32:59 Adam Maybe another quick speech here with everybody. Uh, there's certain stuff I enjoy. And, uh, that's why I don't do too much of it, because I enjoy it.

33:09 Drew You don't want to ruin it?

33:11 Adam I don't want to have a problem.

33:12 Drew Right.

33:13 Adam I like a drink. I like a bong load. I like a cigarette. I like, uh, some sleeping pills. I like a little stump porn. I, uh, if I said too much.

33:21 Drew Yeah.

33:21 Adam There's a lot of stuff I like, but the point is, is I know if I do it every day, then I'll never be able to do it anymore at a certain point.

33:28 Drew Why don't you get the stump porn out of your system, right? Yeah. Go ahead and do that all you want.

33:32 Adam You got to moderate. That's it. Yeah, it's fun to go rent a porn movie.

33:36 Drew What is stump porn anyway? Oh, what is that?

33:38 Adam You know, amputees.

33:41 Caller Is that what that is?

33:42 Caller Yeah.

33:44 Adam Oh, don't play naïve, Drew. Come on.

33:47 Drew I'm trying to imagine what it is.

33:48 Adam Very erotic.

33:49 Drew What is it?

33:50 Adam People without limbs.

33:53 Drew What does that do for somebody?

33:54 Caller I don't know.

33:56 Adam I don't know what's up. You know, people watch anything.

33:59 Drew I've heard you say that term a few... I thought you were saying snuff films or something.

34:02 Adam Well, snuff films, that's another form of pornography.

34:05 Drew But stump porn.

34:06 Adam I think it's out there, yeah.

34:08 Drew I thought it maybe was like...

34:10 Adam Some people, their sexuality and their sort of deviality, if that's a word, combine. They cross somewhere.

34:18 Drew I think that always happens.

34:20 Adam Really?

34:20 Drew I think that's part of the deal.

34:22 Adam Yeah.

34:22 Drew If you're going to be deviant, it's going to do something there, too.

34:25 Adam Yeah, but, you know, I, all right. Andrea? Adriana?

34:31 Caller Adriana.

34:31 Adam Yeah. You're 21.

34:33 Caller Right.

34:34 Adam What's up?

34:35 Okay. I met this guy about four years ago. And we met at the festival. We were both out of state and we clicked right away. And I went back to Texas and he lived in Oklahoma. And we talked and got along and we just had like an instant clicking like we're meant to be. It was crazy. And so he moved down to Dallas to be with me and he was there for six months and it didn't work out. And he moved out to California and we've been apart for about a year, but we've always been talking, been friends, kept in touch. And a few months ago, he was kind of talking to me, sort of like hinting that he, you know, was interested again. And I've always loved him. I've always wanted to be together. We talked about getting married and whatnot. And so I go out to visit and go there for a week. And it's like nothing ever happened. You know, we went all around California and it was great. And when I came back, you know, we kept talking. And he's like, yeah, you should move out here, quit your job. Just really enthusiastic about it. Like everything was back on. And then it's been like two months since I've gone to visit. And since then...

35:37 Drew He met somebody else.

35:38 Excuse me?

35:39 Drew Go ahead.

35:40 Okay. Since then, it's just gone down from really excited. Yeah, I moved down here. It'll be great. We can get a place, go to San Diego. And now it's like today, it's just like, I'm sorry. I don't feel this anymore. I'm just really scared and too young.

35:55 Drew And he met somebody else, Adriana. Wouldn't you say Adam?

35:58 Adam Possibly.

36:00 Drew It sounds like he was lonely and desperate at first, and now he's...

36:03 Adam Yeah, sounds like he's over it. Well, whatever it is...

36:06 Drew It's over.

36:08 Adam At least it is for now. I wouldn't yo-yo with the guy. I know it's a bitch. I know you like the guy. I know you want to believe what you want to believe. But he's telling you he's scared and he's confused and he's too young. You can't move out there. And really all you can do is put the phone down and see if he calls. And even then, you don't know what you're going to get. All right.

36:29 Yes?

36:29 Adam You're 20?

36:30 Caller Yes.

36:31 What's up?

36:32 Caller Basically what's going on is about a week ago my boyfriend and I were experimenting with anal sex. And I wouldn't say that I was unwilling but I was a bit reluctant. And I basically had this very involuntary reaction afterwards.

36:50 Drew Afterwards?

36:51 Adam This is one of my greatest fears in involving anal sex, the involuntary reaction that goes on post anal sex.

36:58 Drew What is it you have in your mind?

36:59 Adam God knows what that involuntary reaction could be.

37:02 Drew And so what happened during it?

37:05 Caller During, I mean, it wasn't painful. I mean, it was a very interesting sensation, but I mean, it was fine. I was fine with it mentally, physically.

37:15 Adam Yeah.

37:15 Drew Spiritually.

37:17 Caller Right.

37:17 Caller Yeah.

37:19 Caller Just basically afterwards, I started to get cold chills and I started shaking, crying uncontrollably.

37:28 Caller Oh, boy.

37:30 Caller And it was just strange to me because I thought I was all right with it.

37:33 Drew Well, no, I wonder if this was a some sort of infection or something, some sort of sepsis.

37:38 Adam I mean, how long how long after the anal sex?

37:42 Caller Oh, immediately after.

37:43 Adam Well, it couldn't be an infection, could it?

37:45 Drew Well, bacteria, bacteria can break in the bloodstream if she tears things or rips something.

37:50 Adam How fast can you have a reaction?

37:52 Drew It's instantaneous. The bacteria gets in, you chill.

37:55 Adam Really?

37:55 Caller Yeah.

37:56 Drew Hmm.

37:57 Adam And maybe he pokes something up in you there, Erica. So what happened?

38:03 Caller Well, basically, I guess I was just wondering if that's somehow connected to any sort of mental instability because I am, you know, diagnosed with certain things.

38:13 Caller What do you got?

38:15 Caller You know, basically, anxiety, depression, eating disorder, blah, blah, blah.

38:21 Adam Yeah. Listen, people that are sort of only the most mentally fit should be engaged in anal sex or you know what I'm saying? I mean...

38:30 Caller In a perfect world, maybe.

38:32 Adam I'm just saying it's sort of like, I don't know, working on Wall Street or something, you know, you really got to have your ass together. Otherwise, you probably just go insane. The pressure would be too much, you know. People that are sort of hovering near the border of Insanityville, that'll push them right over the edge.

38:54 Caller Well, I don't think... Yeah, I wasn't suicidal afterwards or anything, but I don't plan on doing it again in the near future.

39:00 Drew All right.

39:01 Adam Well, you can check that one off the list.

39:04 Caller Exactly.

39:05 Drew So can your boyfriend. He's the one with the list after all, Adam. Right.

39:09 Adam All right.

39:09 Caller Thank you.

39:10 Adam It's like some people, I guess when you're young, you treat sex like some kind of scavenger hunt, you know?

39:15 Drew Yeah.

39:16 Adam Well, let's see what I got here. Ooh, missionary. Ooh, done that one. Scratch that off. Handjob.

39:22 Caller Oh, yeah. Ooh, ooh.

39:27 Adam What's here? Anal sex, threesome? Nope, nope. Got a little orgy. Got to find those. What they shoot? Stump porn? Haven't done that. Hey, people just eat. I don't know. There comes a certain point, though, when you just realize, listen, screw the list. I figured out what I like. I'm just going to double back and do more of what I liked. You start indulging in that. Right, Drew?

39:51 Drew Now you're back to the stump part again.

39:52 Adam That's right.

39:53 Drew All right.

39:53 Adam We'll take a little break. And then when we come back, we'll talk to more screwed up folks. Dr. Drew Loveline. What? Yeah, nose is coming back now. Sore throat's coming in again.

40:23 Drew That's good.

40:23 Adam I'm gonna kill myself. Eric.

40:26 Hey.

40:26 Adam You're 15.

40:27 Caller Yeah.

40:28 Adam What's going on?

40:29 Caller My girlfriend said she was raped to the little girl, and now she's been wanting to have sex with me.

40:34 Adam Yeah.

40:34 Caller Like anywhere and everywhere.

40:37 Adam Oh boy.

40:37 Drew Have you had sex before?

40:39 Caller No.

40:39 Drew You're 15?

40:40 Caller Yeah, I want to.

40:41 Drew Yeah. You got a good instinct. Yeah.

40:43 Adam Have you ever had sex with her?

40:45 Caller No.

40:45 Drew No, no, with anybody.

40:47 Caller Yeah.

40:47 Adam No, I mean, yeah, I've never had sex with anybody. Okay. And how far have you gotten with her?

40:51 Caller Well, we're kind of getting close today in the PE. Lockers, but nothing really.

40:58 Drew You got a great instinct there with that. I kind of don't want to. That's a good instinct.

41:02 Adam Whose locker were you at? Yours or her place?

41:04 Caller Ours.

41:04 Caller Because we're during PE.

41:10 Adam How much sex can you have in a locker room?

41:12 Caller Big locker room.

41:14 Adam Okay. Hey, Eric? Eric?

41:17 Caller Yeah.

41:20 Adam You listen to this show?

41:21 Caller Yeah.

41:22 Adam So, Drew's first response was your instincts are pretty good?

41:27 Caller Because I think she must have sex with me because of her rate.

41:30 Drew Right. That's why.

41:31 Caller I guess he wants to.

41:32 Drew That's correct.

41:32 Adam Well, but it's not a conscious thing, Eric. It's not like I was raped.

41:36 Drew Therefore.

41:37 Adam I'm going to fix it by having sex with Eric. She's just compelled this way because of being stirred up a little bit.

41:43 Drew The way the biology works. That's right. And though once you become a man that has sex with her, she's going to have all kinds of conflicted feelings about you. See, she has to put you in that role of the person that abused her.

41:56 Adam Oh, boy.

41:56 Drew And once you graduate to that, that's when the chaos erupts.

42:00 Adam And there's a connection that goes on in a relationship through having sex. It isn't really present before that.

42:08 Drew Right.

42:09 Adam I mean, you can have a crush on someone. You can like somebody. But until you start having sex, that bond isn't there. And once you get into that, you can't really go back. All you can do is sort of break the bond. So Eric's instincts are solid. This chick may be a handful and he better slow down. And I think he's right.

42:28 Drew Oh, yeah.

42:29 Adam All right. That's fine.

42:30 Drew We never get to talk to that caller.

42:32 Adam I know.

42:32 Drew Mike, nice.

42:33 Adam You're 15. Yeah, we get the one who was trying to, you know, they want to film a threesome.

42:37 Drew Right.

42:37 Adam No, she was raped. She's up for anything.

42:39 Caller That's right.

42:40 Adam Go ahead, Mike. You're 15.

42:41 Caller Yeah. I go to school with this girl and she has a boyfriend, but she like invites me to dances and stuff.

42:50 Caller And I want to know if I should ask her out.

42:54 Drew Why don't you ask her what she's up to? How do we know? You can ask her out, that's fine, but you got to get her to clarify what she's up to.

43:01 Adam Where's her boyfriend?

43:03 Caller I don't know.

43:04 Drew We got to find that out.

43:05 Adam How do you know she has a boyfriend?

43:06 Caller Because she said she did.

43:08 Drew We'll talk to her.

43:08 Caller Why?

43:10 Adam What context was that in? While she was asking you out?

43:13 Caller No, she said she was talking about like she didn't like him anymore and stuff.

43:18 Caller Uh-oh.

43:19 Adam All right.

43:20 Drew Maybe in the bullpen.

43:21 Adam Is he some big guy?

43:24 Caller Does he go to your school?

43:25 Adam You don't know anything?

43:26 Caller He doesn't go to our school.

43:28 Adam Oh, he doesn't?

43:29 Caller All right.

43:30 Adam That's good.

43:32 Caller All right.

43:32 Adam So she asked you to dance.

43:34 Drew Go ahead.

43:34 Adam Why don't you go?

43:36 Caller All right. All right.

43:37 Drew There we go. Another satisfied customer.

43:38 Adam Wow. We're really helping people out.

43:40 Drew Let's go.

43:41 Adam Josh?

43:42 Caller Yeah.

43:43 Adam You're 17.

43:44 Caller Right.

43:44 Adam What's up?

43:45 Caller Well, I work at an Arby's. And my boss keeps like sex. Sex with her after night.

43:50 Adam Is it a guy?

43:52 Caller Yeah.

43:52 Drew What does he do?

43:55 Caller It's not only me. It's like he asks what I'm doing after work and stuff like that. Yeah.

44:01 Drew Why don't you tell your parents?

44:03 Caller Do what?

44:03 Drew Why don't you tell your parents? You're 17.

44:07 Adam How do you know he's... I mean, what else does he do?

44:10 Caller Well, I mean, he'd ask me that a lot, but my other friends, they say that he talks stuff to them.

44:17 Drew Where do you work?

44:18 Adam Arby's.

44:19 Drew Arby's?

44:19 Caller Yeah.

44:20 Caller We sell like, you know, roast beef sandwiches and giblets.

44:23 Adam Oh, let me write that down. Arby's...

44:25 Drew Arby's roast beef sells...

44:26 Adam You can now get roast beef?

44:27 Drew At Arby's roast beef. Yes, you can.

44:29 Adam Right. It's not all churro and falafel? They used to have the falafel over there.

44:35 Caller Um, that I don't know.

44:37 Adam That ain't...

44:37 Caller No falafel?

44:38 Caller I'm just tired of...

44:39 Adam I don't know.

44:40 Caller I'm just like tired of him.

44:41 Drew Well, you can quit. That's one thing. That's certainly you can do that. But if you want to own Arby's, which you could easily do...

44:47 Adam Hey, you...

44:49 Drew If you catch this guy, you could own that Arby's.

44:52 Caller Please?

44:53 Drew That institution has a huge liability with that guy behaving the way he does. If you catch him, you now own Arby's.

45:01 Adam What do you mean, catch him?

45:02 Drew If you document, if you prove that he is harassing you.

45:06 Adam Well, don't do that.

45:08 Drew How can I prove it?

45:09 Adam Hey, Josh? Yeah? They have to dust your anus.

45:13 Drew What?

45:13 Adam Oh, yes. It's painful, but it's worth it.

45:16 Caller She's a good girl.

45:18 Adam What the? Hey, Josh?

45:19 Caller Yeah?

45:20 Adam Who are you talking to?

45:21 Caller Oh, I'm sorry. I was talking to my friend.

45:24 Caller I want to talk to Greg Brydie.

45:27 Adam What the?

45:28 Drew What the hell? Is it the same guy?

45:30 Caller I want to talk to Greg Brydie.

45:31 Drew It's the same guy, isn't it?

45:33 Adam Oh, it's the uh... You're talking about the uh...

45:37 Drew He called last night. He called when Barry Williams was on.

45:40 Adam Oh, really?

45:41 Drew And what did he want? What did he ask when...

45:44 Caller I don't think it's the same guy.

45:46 Adam You don't think it's the same guy?

45:47 Drew Sure sounds like it.

45:48 Caller I want to talk to Greg Brydie.

45:49 Adam Josh?

45:51 Drew Josh?

45:53 Caller Oh, see?

45:55 Adam Uh-huh. I screwed up. It is him. Very good. I didn't know.

45:58 Drew What did he call for when he wanted to talk to Greg Brydie?

46:00 Adam I can't remember what the hell that was. God, I usually tune out of this show. You know what I mean? I don't remember anything. I'm not really here. Like right now, I don't know where I am. Who are you? What are you doing in my bedroom? I swear to God, I'll call the cops. You don't leave. All right. Very good detective work there, Lisa Anderson. Tommy?

46:22 Caller Yeah, hey.

46:23 Adam You're 16?

46:24 Caller Yep.

46:24 Adam What's up?

46:25 Caller Well, I was talking to my dad earlier today, and he said that he heard on the radio yesterday that licorice would lower your testosterone.

46:35 Drew Well, that's interesting. I'm not aware of that, but I'd be interested in seeing the study.

46:39 Caller Yeah, I asked him like who it was, but he forgot or didn't know or something.

46:45 Drew There was substances in black licorice from the olden days that used to do things to the kidney function, but I don't know that there's anything like that anymore.

46:52 Adam Let me tell you how this conversation went. Dad, I'm going to the movies. Uh-huh. Can I have some money? Yeah, here's two dollars.

47:02 Drew No, I need fifteen.

47:03 Adam Fifteen? What in Christ's name for?

47:08 Drew Licorice.

47:08 Caller Licorice?

47:10 Adam Uh, let me tell you about licorice, son. You want to turn to a bitch? You eat licorice because it lowers your testosterone. Soda milk guts and goobers and raisinettes and large sodas.

47:24 Caller Yup.

47:26 Adam Seriously. Yeah, maybe it's the licorice, not licorice, like red vines licorice. That's not really licorice.

47:33 Drew That's just like true licorice.

47:35 Adam Stuff that has that licorice, well, made out of the licorice plant, right?

47:38 Caller Right.

47:39 Caller Yeah. Yeah. All right.

47:40 Adam Well, maybe it does.

47:41 Caller I don't know.

47:42 Caller I was just wondering if you guys...

47:43 Drew I'll keep my eyes open for that. Okay?

47:45 Caller Okay.

47:45 Adam But keep in mind, all you youngins out there, all that stuff you hear, it doesn't make a difference. You know, when they talk about sperm counts raised by this, sperm counts lowered by that, licorice causes this, this causes that.

47:59 Drew As soon as it does make a difference, it vanishes.

48:02 Caller Right.

48:02 Drew It's no longer on the market, because nobody's going to accept that liability.

48:05 Adam Right, right. You'll never notice the difference. Yeah. Everyone, go eat a ginseng pill and see if it's like doing a line of speed. You know what I mean? It's nothing. None of that stuff's anything. Anything that's cheap, anything that's easy, anything you could buy, they'll work.

48:21 Caller All right. All right.

48:23 Adam We'll be back.

48:26 Caller We'll be right back.

48:41 Adam It's the Love Line. We gotta take a quick 10-second time out. We'll be back with more of the show in just 10 seconds.

48:49 Caller This is Love Line on radio station.

48:56 Caller Maybe we should shut down the station while we're still breathing.

48:59 Drew Let's do our alternatives.

49:04 Adam Right, it is Love Line. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-A-V-E-1-9-1. Next week, Ice Tea, Blink-182 will be in here, and many surprise guests.

49:18 Drew Many, many.

49:20 Adam Cavalcade. Some celebrities too big to mention over the air. I like when places do that. We're selling big screen TVs and stereo units at such rock bottom prices. Those were forbidden by law for mentioning them on air. I always like that angle. Really. You're saying like 20% off you can talk about, 30% you're pushing it, and when you're starting to talk about savings, 75-80%, the FCC intervenes. I like when they do this one too. Please, no wholesalers. So you sit home, you go, Jesus Christ. I mean, there's, I mean, other, other merchants are buying from these guys. Those have to be rock bottom prices. And coincidentally, you know what time it is? It's dealing day.

50:13 Caller Uh-huh.

50:13 Adam Jesus Christ. Larry?

50:16 Caller Yes.

50:16 Adam You're 27. What's? Oh, Jesus.

50:20 Drew What's going on, Larry?

50:21 Caller Yeah.

50:21 Caller Um, my friend told me I should call you show. I had injured myself. Injured myself. And I was wondering if, uh, Dr. Drew, you could tell me how to... I've got this injury on, uh, my...

50:31 Adam No, please.

50:32 Drew No. Please.

50:35 Adam Please, sir.

50:36 Caller What's up with Larry over there?

50:38 Caller Yeah. Hello.

50:39 Adam This is Larry. I have injured my penises.

50:43 Caller I want to talk to Greg Brady. Yeah. Yeah, sir.

50:46 Caller I think Larry's for real.

50:47 Caller I talked to him for a while.

50:48 Caller Really?

50:49 Adam Really?

50:49 Caller No way. No way.

50:52 Adam Larry?

50:53 Caller Yeah.

50:53 Adam This is your host, Adam.

50:57 Caller See, now these people are laughing at me now.

50:59 Adam No, not everyone's laughing at you. Just me and Drew.

51:01 Caller No, I mean the people I work with over here.

51:02 Caller Where do you work?

51:04 Caller Well, I work at...

51:05 Caller me now.

51:06 Caller All right.

51:06 Adam Hand the phone to one of them.

51:08 Caller Maybe Dr. Drew could help me, though.

51:09 Adam Hand the phone to one of them, Larry.

51:11 Caller Yes!

51:11 Caller Qualified?

51:12 Caller Let me go get them. All right.

51:14 Adam That's good. I want to see what they're gonna do.

51:15 Caller Hello, there. I'm a friend of Larry's.

51:18 Caller They're running into... You want to talk to my friend?

51:20 Caller Yeah.

51:20 Adam Hey, I hope the guy is an Eastern Indian type.

51:24 Caller No, his name is Troy.

51:26 Caller All right.

51:27 Caller Hang on. He's in the other room, though. Yeah.

51:29 Caller Okay.

51:29 Caller Good try.

51:30 Caller Good try.

51:31 Caller All right.

51:32 Drew Here comes Larry as Troy.

51:34 Caller Hello?

51:35 Caller Troy? Yeah.

51:37 Caller Where's Larry?

51:38 Caller Larry? He had to step out of the room because he got to watch our post.

51:43 Adam I see. It's very complicated working in the fast-paced world of pharmaceuticals, isn't it?

51:48 Caller Yeah.

51:49 Adam Larry, have Troy yell something, okay?

51:52 Drew Or Troy have Larry yell something?

51:53 Adam Yeah. Sorry. Troy, have Larry yell something from across the room.

51:58 Caller Okay.

51:58 Drew Hold on. No, no.

51:59 Adam You stay on the phone. Just have Larry yell.

52:03 Caller Well, he has to step out. Hang on. Larry, what do you want to talk?

52:10 Drew He's walking away. Yeah, we can hear you walking away, Troy.

52:13 Caller All right. All right. That's good work. Okay.

52:17 Adam Listen, you nomskull. If you're going to do a fake voice, you got to do a voice that I can't do, because I have no range and no talent when it comes to voices. And if you're going to do like a, you know, El Lamo 101. See, here's the thing. Certain people do certain impressions, but everybody does certain people. Like everyone can do certain voices. There's certain presidents. And, you know, it was like when Reagan was in office, there was, hey, hey, mommy. It's like, because everyone can do that. There's certain voices humans can mimic. And I think Yogi Bear may be one of them. I think that may be one of them, too. The point is, is if I can do it, anyone can do it.

53:01 Drew And therefore?

53:02 Adam Therefore, you must be faking.

53:03 Drew You're disqualified, yeah.

53:06 Adam Yes, hello, Anne.

53:08 Drew Anne.

53:09 Caller What's going on?

53:10 Caller You sounded like a ladies man.

53:12 Drew Yeah.

53:13 Adam I see by the covassier bottle that our time is almost up.

53:17 Drew What's up?

53:19 Caller Yeah. Listen to your show. You talk to some people like you said, you seem to indicate that women with eating disorders to have some sort of psychological makeup or something.

53:30 Drew I mean, we could pick them out.

53:32 Caller Yeah. I was wondering what that would be, because it seems to be developing a little bit of bulimia.

53:40 Drew The basic thing is a parental situation in which you aren't identified or nurtured as a wholly separate person. You're really very much there to serve the needs of the parents. Not necessarily a conscious thing, but there's a lack of empathy on a certain level, so you don't really develop a full sense of yourself. Pieces of your emotional self are left behind and they have nothing left to express themselves with other than these compulsions.

54:09 Adam Okay, but it's basically mommy pushing too hard, taking it to ballet class.

54:14 Caller Or daddy in this case.

54:15 Adam Or daddy.

54:16 Drew Well, it's intrusion. It's intrusion and annihilation of your real self.

54:21 Adam Because your folks want you to be perfect.

54:22 Drew Yeah.

54:24 Caller I don't know that they want it. I don't know. My parents pretty much seem like they just left me to fend for myself.

54:31 Adam And it shouldn't cause eating disorder.

54:34 Caller Yeah, I don't know.

54:35 Drew Well, if you sexual abuse will give you any disorder.

54:37 Caller No, no sexual abuse.

54:38 Adam Well, what did daddy do?

54:40 Caller He didn't do anything except that I mean, like I was like beat up and bullied as a kid and pretty much just left me to fend for myself and he's always, he's sort of emotionally distant, I think.

54:50 Adam Yeah. Well, maybe that's just food poisoning then. You shouldn't have an eating disorder.

54:54 Caller Well, it started like, it didn't start until I was like 18. I started running and I got really compulsive about my weight. And then I stopped running. I started eating because I felt really guilty that I couldn't lose the weight. So I just like binge.

55:07 Adam Yeah. Well, what are you doing now?

55:09 Caller Well, now I like lost weight again. I'm back in shape.

55:12 Adam Right.

55:12 Caller Except that like I injured my foot, so I can't exercise. And so like I feel really bad that I can't exercise. I go and eat a bunch of food. But now I've got like I just throw it up really easily. I'm just like, rather than sit around and feel like crap, like I used to go and throw it up. And it's gotten really easy to do that.

55:29 Adam How can you enjoy the food knowing you're going to have it back up in a few minutes?

55:32 Caller So I don't really enjoy it.

55:34 Caller It's just like compulsion. Yeah.

55:36 Adam Right. All right. Well, here you go. There's the eating disorder. Yeah.

55:40 Caller So I mean, I don't want obviously I don't want to be doing that. I would like to eat like reasonably and like get my weight down because I want to be a competitive runner.

55:48 Adam And, you know, why, why do you want to compete running?

55:52 Caller I don't know.

55:53 Adam It's a horrible sport. I just you see the women who compete running their mess. I know it's not good to your body.

56:01 Caller Yeah. But it's like gives me the best psychological feeling.

56:04 Caller I feel wonderful.

56:05 Adam Yeah.

56:06 Caller And like, I don't know what else gives me that. Nothing. I mean, I've really been depressed like God my whole life. And that gives me gives me focus. It makes me feel really good.

56:17 Drew How much getting your depression treated? How about getting your depression treated?

56:21 Adam You run on over to the shrink.

56:23 Caller I haven't been in the shrink. I got on Prozac for a month. And if it helped me be, I mean, I think it's the only thing to kill my appetite.

56:30 Caller So I was really happy that I lost like 10 pounds.

56:33 Adam How much you weigh now?

56:34 Caller Like one three.

56:36 Adam And how tall are you?

56:37 Caller Five, six.

56:38 Adam Yeah, just about right. All right. So there you are. Hey, listen, why don't you get some counseling?

56:43 Caller I don't want to go. I don't want to go to counseling.

56:45 Adam Well, all right. Then just run in a circle until your shoes fall off. Oh, sounds like a good one. I can't smell anything with my nose. I'll get a little whiff of that. No, nothing. Yeah.

57:02 Caller Well, that's disgusting.

57:03 Adam Well, it's torture. Torture, man. Can't smell his own fart. You know, that's when it's time to die, Drew. You know what I mean?

57:12 Drew You're going to get to appreciate your own work.

57:13 Caller Oh, horrible.

57:15 Adam And I've had almost no gas, like, over the last two weeks.

57:18 Caller What a shame.

57:20 Adam Yeah. I don't know what that is.

57:22 Drew It's no gas.

57:24 Adam I'll tell you what I call the dry spell.

57:25 Drew You're eating right.

57:26 Adam No, it ain't that. It's just no gas. And it bothers me. I'm going to go see a physician.

57:33 Drew Okay.

57:34 Adam What's up with the gas?

57:36 Drew You're good. When you swallow air, that gives you gas. Maybe a little bit of that.

57:40 Adam You know what I'm going to do? On the ride home tonight, I'm going to open the window, hang my mouth out. I'm going to swallow like several, you know, thousand cubic feet of oxygen and then just go home and fart my entire house out.

57:54 Drew What do you think? Sounds wonderful.

57:56 Adam Sounds like an evening.

57:57 Drew Quite a time.

57:58 Adam Ross?

57:58 Caller Yeah. You're 20. Yep.

58:01 Adam What's up?

58:02 Caller Nothing. Me and my girlfriend have been seeing each other for a little over a year and a half now and I recently, well, she went away to college about four months ago and I've been going to school myself. Recently I met somebody close to me and we've spent a lot of time together and my girlfriend that moved away, I had a really, really decent relationship, you know. We were together all the time and, you know, we had really good sex and a lot of good things happened but now I've, you know, kind of fell out of touch with her and everybody tells me that, you know, long distance relationships don't even work out really but I've been trying to make it work and now I've met this girl and I've met, I've spent so much time with her now that I don't think about my other girlfriend that much anymore.

58:56 Drew What's normal for your age?

58:58 Caller Yep and I just don't know what to do. I'm really confused.

59:02 Drew You got a break up with the, how long is your first girlfriend going to be away?

59:06 Caller Until she's coming back in December but I really don't live in a town that we used to live in together. I moved away to go to school myself.

59:15 Drew So you guys don't have a life together?

59:17 Adam It's a lay up for us. I mean, you pick up the phone, you have a tough 15 minutes and then you're done. I mean, you guys aren't living together, you're not living in the same town, she's out of town, you know.

59:29 Drew It's a natural part of relationships in your age group.

59:32 Adam And how big, she may be disappointed, but how devastated could one be? You're not even seeing the person. Right. You're not seeing them, you know what I mean? It's like whether you're together or whether you're broken up, it's almost, it's just, it's sort of, what word am I trying to look for? It's academic. You're still not seeing each other.

59:55 Drew Right. Moot. Doesn't matter.

59:58 Adam Yeah. It's moot. Academic will work.

1:00:00 Drew Yeah. Yeah. I'm not disagreeing with you.

1:00:02 Adam No, no.

1:00:03 Drew I'm just concurring with others.

1:00:04 Caller All right.

1:00:06 Adam Joseph and Mary. Melissa? You're 19?

1:00:11 Caller Yep.

1:00:12 Caller What's up?

1:00:13 Caller Well, I don't know if you got the question earlier, but this is for the doc. What happened is like I got on the birth control the shot that they give you.

1:00:22 Drew Depo provera?

1:00:23 Caller Uh-huh. And they told me that probably I would just totally miss my period all the time.

1:00:29 Drew At first you bleed a lot. Then you start missing your period.

1:00:32 Caller Okay. Because yeah, that was my problem. Like I skipped my first period and then like...

1:00:38 Drew You bled the rest of the three months.

1:00:39 Caller Yep. Whole months at a time.

1:00:41 Drew There you go.

1:00:42 Caller So if I stay on... Because I was thinking about getting off of it. But if I stay on it, will it fill out?

1:00:46 Drew Usually it stops. Usually the second shot, but definitely by the third. And then most women or often women lose their period all together.

1:00:53 Adam Okay. Why did you choose the Depo shot?

1:00:56 Caller Because I am really absent minded and I know I would forget to take pills.

1:01:01 Adam Nice. And nothing happened in the past?

1:01:05 Drew Why? Why would you ask that?

1:01:06 Adam I'm just curious. It sounds amazingly mature to say I know I would screw something up before you screw it up.

1:01:14 Caller Well, I know myself.

1:01:16 Adam Well, that's great. All right. So you weren't never on the pill?

1:01:19 Caller No.

1:01:20 Adam That's good.

1:01:20 Caller First time I've been on birth control.

1:01:22 Adam Yeah. Why not?

1:01:23 Caller How often do you get that shot?

1:01:24 Adam Three months?

1:01:25 Caller Yeah.

1:01:25 Caller Every three months.

1:01:26 Drew Good for you, Melissa.

1:01:27 Adam Did they send you a letter?

1:01:29 Caller Um, I don't know, because I just moved, so I'm going to have to go to a different clinic.

1:01:34 Caller But keep going.

1:01:35 Adam They must have to.

1:01:36 Drew Don't forget the condoms if it's a new partner.

1:01:38 Adam They must have to track you down, right? Yeah. Or should tell you, right?

1:01:44 Drew Well, it depends. It depends on the patient, really. A patient should be responsible for their own stuff this way.

1:01:50 Adam What the hell you think that reminder card looks like? You know, the one you get from the dentist? Yeah. Yeah, they're Snoopy, wrestling a giant toothbrush. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. What's up with the dentist? You idiots can't sort of join reality. Get a goddamn card and say it's time to get your teeth clean. I don't want to see like a clown sitting on top of a giant stack of floss crying, and it says, we miss you. You know what I mean? All I want to do is go in there with a gun and start killing people when I see that. What's up with dentists? Why can't these guys just say, hey, it's been six months. Come in and get your teeth clean. Does everything have to be cute? Does everything have to rhyme? Does everything have to be interesting or witty? And especially since it isn't. That's what always gets offensive to me.

1:02:44 Caller They have one card.

1:02:45 Adam It's like, you get, they pull your card, the same pot, 35 year old guy, you get the same one that the four year old gets and the retard gets, you all get the same one. Some goofy cartoon character who's talking or, maybe Mr. Toothbrush has his hands on his hips and he's looking disappointed. I do not get one foot closer to that office based on that card. Just be a human being. Treat adults like adults. So, with the depot, you know, it's been three months, it's time for the booster shot.

1:03:19 Drew Yeah. What do you think?

1:03:21 Adam Like a chick on her back with her legs up in the air.

1:03:24 Drew You know, the companies have those logos, a nice contour with like a pregnant woman's body. Oh, nice.

1:03:30 Adam Sort of like the Alfred Hitchcock presents a profile.

1:03:33 Caller There you go.

1:03:34 Drew But they artistically now a little curry, a little sort of some sort of maybe brought into like the treble clef side or something, you know, something really hard.

1:03:43 Adam Right. Yeah. Yeah, I like that.

1:03:46 Caller Yeah.

1:03:47 Adam I swear to God, is there is there one of those, it's time to get your teeth clean from adult that's made for people over 11?

1:03:53 Caller No.

1:03:55 Adam And does it exist? And how did that get started? And how can we put an end to it?

1:03:59 Drew That's how they have to treat you to get you in there.

1:04:01 Adam I wipe my ass with those things you idiot dentist, you evil teeth picking people with your drills and your scrapers.

1:04:08 Drew You haven't seen your little deal with gum device lately.

1:04:10 Adam I keep up my car.

1:04:11 Drew You still do it?

1:04:12 Adam Started flossing.

1:04:13 Drew You did?

1:04:14 Adam Yes.

1:04:15 Drew Why?

1:04:16 Adam So I was getting a cavity like every six weeks.

1:04:19 Drew So that's what it was like negative reinforcement, the reverse of conditioning that you kept getting these drilling done, and you figured the only way it's going to stop is.

1:04:27 Adam Oh, well, now the guy wants to take my wisdom tooth out. This guy's a genius. He's like, he's a guy screwed up my root canal. I should stop talking about him. But every time I go in there, I get an earful from him and his staff. But, you know, the guy says, look, one of your wisdom teeth has a filling. That's OK. I mean, it's got a cavity. We could fill it or we could just take it out. Yeah, if this guy went to the auto body store, he'd be like, we could fix the fender. We just push the goddamn car into the ocean. Yeah, OK. So let me do the math here. You take all my teeth out, no more fillings?

1:05:02 Caller All righty.

1:05:03 Adam That's a good plan. So he said, well, you know, it's doing all right, but, you know, it could come out. Like, yeah, good. My jaw feels a little heavy. I'm in a little trouble flapping it. So I don't know what the hell to do. So his plan is we'll take the tooth out, and then we won't have to fill it. I compromised with him. I said, why don't you pull the tooth, then you fill it, and I can watch and help.

1:05:25 Drew Wait, we'll just pull all your teeth and be done with this guy.

1:05:29 Adam Yeah, absolutely. They're good. We'll all save some money. This is a, this is the place, by the way, that I went to where they said, they said, listen, you want to, you want to pay all at once, or do you want to break the payments in, up, you know, over months? And I said, well, how much does insurance cover? I said, 80 percent. I said, this, this was a couple of root canals and a cleaning and a bunch of x-rays, a whole bunch of stuff, you know. I said, pays 80 percent the insurance? I said, yep. I said, all right, well, let's just pay for it all at once. Do all the work at once. We'll take care of it all at once. So I get this bill for like 2,400 bucks.

1:06:06 Caller Oof.

1:06:07 Adam 2,400 bucks? I thought the insurance paid 80 percent of it.

1:06:10 Caller It did.

1:06:11 Adam Up to 1,100.

1:06:12 Caller Oh, I'm like, oh, okay.

1:06:15 Adam That's one of the things we could talk about, you know?

1:06:17 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:06:17 Adam Well, you said to have the whole thing paid for. I said, yeah, but you didn't tell me about the part about the 1,100 ceiling. So I broke it up into a couple of months anyway. But the good news is I get the ether every time I go in there. I get the nitrous every time. And now once you make the nitrous list, everybody, you're on. Nitrous in the waiting room. I walk out of the car with a rolling tank of nitrous. I get in the car. They just shove the nitrous hose through the thing. I roll the windows up and they pump nitrous into the car.

1:06:52 Drew Have they got your dose sort of worked out? Remember you freaked out that one time.

1:06:56 Adam I had a bummer trip.

1:06:57 Caller Yeah, you had a bad trip. I was like, oh, oh, oh.

1:07:00 Adam The thing about nitrous is, man, you walk a fine line because you can be right there or you can just start spiraling down like, remember the turtle with Mr. Wizard?

1:07:12 Drew Tooter Turtle.

1:07:12 Adam Yeah, I was like, oh, I don't want to be a drug addict. And you're lying there in that chair and I'll tell you what happened. The problem was is I grabbed the wrong CD and it started to freak my high out. Remember I told you this? I got root canal done. And the thing about root canal, everybody, and this is why you should all floss, ain't no amount of anesthetic good enough for root canal because root canal, they go into your soul for that. I mean you feel it in your bones. I mean my knees hurt after that root canal. I mean it's into the marrow, you know what I mean? And it doesn't matter how numb you are when you're being violated. It's like shoot me in the ass and then bang me in the ass. I'm still going to know it. I may not hurt but I'm going to feel violated. I was lying down in this chair. I had the nitrous going. I had a CD picked out because they have these headphones and the CD player. I grabbed, I couldn't think of, you know, they always have those crappy CDs at the dentist office, you know, all these pop ones and it's like Kenny, best of Kenny Loggins and a bunch of nonsense like that. I grabbed the Manhattan Transfer because I thought fine I'll listen to jazz. I wanted something sort of neutral. It was the Manhattan Transfer Christmas out. So I'm lying there. It's the middle of August. The guy said, you know, the guy's actually, you know, he's got one knee on my groin and he's got his foot in my mouth and he's digging in that root canal. He's just digging in there. And I'm like, I'm like, chestnuts roasting on an open fire. And it's like, it's like I'm here like the little drummer boy. And I'm here like the sleigh bells ringing and stuff. And I'm there and I got the nitrous stuffed in me. And I'm just looking at the ceiling and I'm just going, Jesus Christ, I'm losing it. I'm spinning out and I keep thinking the guy's talking to me and I can't hear him. That was my that was like my main thing. Yeah, like, like, you know, the dentist, they'll talk to you. Well, you got the earphones on, you know, you know, I thought I was biting down on his hand or that I was moving around. And I would kept I kept thinking he was saying something to me.

1:09:25 Drew Oh, awful.

1:09:27 Adam Oh, Jesus, like being in Vietnam. I mean, you know, Vietnam was in Burbank. That's what it'd be like. Viet Bank is what it was. All right. My mouth hurts. I will take a little break and we'll be back. Let's see, Adam, that's Drew. Phone number, 1-800-LMV-E-191. And it's back to the phones we go. Let's talk to Joe.

1:10:10 Drew Joe?

1:10:10 Caller Yeah, hi.

1:10:12 Adam 28?

1:10:13 Drew Yep.

1:10:13 Adam What's up?

1:10:14 Caller Well, I have a problem. I've been having sex for many years now, and my problem is that I'd have to say for about the last year, a little over a year now, the girl that I'm seeing, same girl for, I'd probably say, about three years. While having sex, I cannot have, I guess, orgasm.

1:10:38 Drew You guess?

1:10:39 Caller And I, I mean, for some reason, I mean, I don't know what the problem is. I mean, I have no problem with masturbation, but during sex, I just can't reach orgasm.

1:10:48 Drew Are you on any medications?

1:10:50 Caller Yeah.

1:10:50 Drew What are you taking?

1:10:51 Caller Percocets.

1:10:52 Drew Well, there you go.

1:10:53 Caller That'll do it?

1:10:54 Drew Yep.

1:10:55 Caller Wow. I mean, but I don't take it on a regular basis, though. I mean, will it do it just from now on? I mean-

1:11:02 Drew What are you taking Percocet for? It's a powerful opiate. It's like heroin.

1:11:06 Caller I had back surgery and I still have back problems and I'll be having more surgeries.

1:11:13 Drew How often do you take the Percocet?

1:11:15 Caller Only when I'm in severe pain.

1:11:17 Drew How often is that?

1:11:19 Caller Once or twice a week, maybe.

1:11:21 Drew The other thing, maybe the back pain, the back problem is impinging on the function down there.

1:11:25 Caller Really?

1:11:26 Adam What did you do to your back?

1:11:27 Caller Fell off a ladder.

1:11:28 Drew Yeah, I would talk to your neurosurgeon or neurologist about that.

1:11:32 Adam Was the ladder leaning up against the house or was it just flat on the ground?

1:11:36 Caller No, it was leaning up onto a shelf, about 12 feet.

1:11:41 Adam I was just making a joke there.

1:11:43 Drew Any other medications?

1:11:45 Caller Uh, Neurontin.

1:11:47 Drew That's another thing that can do that.

1:11:50 Caller Now, I mean, if I stop taking it, will I still have this problem?

1:11:54 Drew No, it will get normal again.

1:11:56 Adam What's the Neurontin for?

1:11:57 Drew Neurontin is a medicine called gabapentin. It's good for chronic pain, has some anti-anxiety properties and some anti-pain properties. Very good medicine. It was originally developed as a seizure medicine.

1:12:08 Adam I'll ever tell you about the time. This is one more reason to kick dad in the nuts. I was working construction. I was, had a skill worm drive hypoid saw with a carburundum blade on it and I was cutting stucco on the second floor of this hillside house. You know the kind where the front, the top floor, sort of the main floor and then it goes down? Yeah. And there's those real steep cement stairs that go down the side of the house usually. You know, walk down there and go around to the bottom of the house. Usually like the stilts are. I was up on the second floor on some makeshift scaffolding that my idiot friend John Gillingham built with this 20 pound skill saw over my head. Sitting there with my feet sort of hanging inside the house but my ass was hanging out the house, cutting stucco. The whole thing just went just like that.

1:12:59 Drew Scaffolding did?

1:13:00 Adam Pow! Wasn't scaffolding, it was just something that hung out the window. My feet were dragging all the way down the side of the building and I landed on these cement stairs. One cheek on, one cheek off. Oh, that was a bitch. That was a bitch.

1:13:18 Drew It's like a story. You fell down a floor.

1:13:21 Adam Yeah, I fell a little like a historian and a half.

1:13:24 Drew Did you were able to hold the saw away from you or what happened to the saw?

1:13:28 Adam Second the thing gave way, because I had the saw over my head, the second thing gave way, my impulse was to just toss the saw in the building. And then when the plywood and stuff landed on me that I was sitting on originally, I immediately pulled it over my head because I figured the saw was coming with me, but the saw made it into the building. But I landed one cheek on the stair, right cheek on stair, and left palm on three or four lower stairs.

1:13:59 Drew That's where the original injury was.

1:14:00 Adam No, that isn't, but I got a scar from that. But the point is, I should just sue somebody. I limped into work the next day because I thought I was going to get canned if I didn't show up.

1:14:11 Drew How old were you?

1:14:12 Adam 19.

1:14:13 Drew Oh my God, you must have had anything at that age, can you?

1:14:15 Adam Seven bucks an hour. I mean, seriously F'd up. I mean, hip was like jacked up and I just limped in the next day. I remember thinking I better go in there.

1:14:23 Drew Oh my God.

1:14:24 Adam And then, oh, did I use the F word there? Yes, you did. I swear to God, I must be getting tired. I swear, I'm such an idiot. What an idiot, you know what I mean? I should have taken a week off and told him, listen, I'm taking a week off with full pain. If you don't like it, you'll hear from my attorney. Stupid parents.

1:14:44 Drew But you thought that way then.

1:14:45 Adam Yeah, right.

1:14:47 Caller Jesus Christ.

1:14:48 Adam Kelly?

1:14:49 Caller Yes.

1:14:49 Caller You're 30.

1:14:51 Adam What's going on?

1:14:52 Caller Well, I don't have a question, but I just was going to tell you guys, I always hear all these like negative things about, and I'm sure that most of the time it is negative, like menage-a-trois, but I just have a positive story to say.

1:15:04 Caller All right, tell us.

1:15:05 Caller Well, it's just my, actually now it's my husband, but my friend and my boyfriend at the time, we, about two years ago, had a menage-a-trois. We just decided that we would, cause he had told me that that was like a fantasy of his, and so I just like said to her, and she was like, all right, let's do it. So we did, and it was all fine.

1:15:30 Drew Are you kind of into women?

1:15:31 Caller Excuse me?

1:15:31 Drew Are you sort of into women yourself?

1:15:33 Caller No, not, no, no, I'm not, actually. No. I mean, she's an attractive woman, but I'm not, I've never been, had anything with a woman before.

1:15:42 Adam So were you all right with your boyfriend having sex with another woman?

1:15:46 Caller Actually, yeah. I mean, it was okay. I mean, I wouldn't want him doing it if I wasn't there with her, you know what I mean, but it was actually, it was fine.

1:15:55 Adam So he actually had intercourse with her, huh?

1:15:58 Caller Yeah, he did.

1:15:59 Drew How do you deal with that?

1:16:00 Adam Then when did you guys break up?

1:16:02 Caller No, we're married now.

1:16:03 Adam Oh, you are?

1:16:04 Caller Yeah.

1:16:04 Drew How did you deal with that at the time? Didn't it feel kind of funny?

1:16:08 Caller Actually, you know what? I don't know why, but it didn't. I mean, I would think that it would, but it didn't. And we're all still friends and everything's like, in fact, like a few months ago, we kind of like all fooled around again.

1:16:22 Adam Really?

1:16:23 Caller I think he didn't have intercourse with her, but.

1:16:24 Adam Why not?

1:16:26 Caller I don't know. I don't know why it didn't happen.

1:16:30 Drew One of the things that can happen in situations like that is some pairing occurs where some heavy feelings start developing, things you don't expect to happen, don't want to happen, happen anyway.

1:16:40 Adam Well, listen, a lot of the people we talk to, one of them ends up liking the other one. I guess that's what you're saying.

1:16:47 Drew For all you know, maybe the reason they didn't have intercourse is because these two were carrying on by themselves.

1:16:52 Adam He was tired of banging her from earlier in the afternoon.

1:16:54 Drew Well, or they sort of feel awkward about it. Oh, maybe she'll catch on that we're doing this.

1:16:57 Adam It's kind of interesting, actually. I think about that. Hold on a second. Wait a minute. What's that echo?

1:17:02 Caller I don't know.

1:17:02 Drew Is that her line?

1:17:03 Caller No.

1:17:03 Adam It went away.

1:17:04 Drew Yeah.

1:17:05 Adam Okay, listen. What if, and I'm not saying this is if, but what if you're carrying on with a girl, you're fooling around behind your wife's back, and then it's like we're going to have a threesome with this chick. I wouldn't have sex with her because I'd be like too suspicious.

1:17:21 Drew That's the point. That's why things go on here.

1:17:23 Adam No.

1:17:24 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:17:25 Adam No. What line was that?

1:17:28 Drew What the hell line was that? Two.

1:17:30 Adam Two?

1:17:30 Caller All right.

1:17:31 Adam Kelly?

1:17:32 Caller Yeah?

1:17:33 Adam All right. How long you guys been married?

1:17:35 Caller We're newlyweds, actually.

1:17:36 Adam Uh-huh. And...

1:17:38 Caller But she doesn't even live in this town. She lives in San Francisco.

1:17:43 Adam What's your husband do for a living?

1:17:45 Caller He works for his family's business.

1:17:47 Drew Does he travel?

1:17:49 Caller No.

1:17:49 Adam Oh, okay.

1:17:50 Caller All right.

1:17:51 Adam We don't want to plant any evil seeds. And you're okay? You're...

1:17:54 Caller Yeah, and she's married, too.

1:17:56 Adam All right.

1:17:56 Drew Oh, well, that'll stop her.

1:17:59 Adam She's married? Well, she wouldn't cheat.

1:18:01 Caller No, I'm not. No, I'm just...

1:18:02 Drew She's having threesomes. A married girl's having threesomes with their friends. His friends.

1:18:07 Adam What's her husband think of this?

1:18:08 Caller Well, actually, he doesn't know.

1:18:10 Adam Oh, boy.

1:18:11 Drew This is not a good story, Kelly.

1:18:13 Adam Hey, Kelly.

1:18:14 Drew It's an awful story.

1:18:15 Adam Where's your dad?

1:18:17 Caller Oh, he's at home.

1:18:19 Adam Yeah? How's that going?

1:18:21 Caller Good. Really good. My parents have been... They'll be celebrating a 50th wedding anniversary in April of next year.

1:18:28 Adam Okay.

1:18:29 Caller Good.

1:18:29 Adam Do you guys have any kids?

1:18:30 Caller Nope.

1:18:31 Adam Good.

1:18:31 Drew Alright, keep it that way.

1:18:32 Caller Alright.

1:18:34 Caller But why do you say that? I mean, can't it just... I mean...

1:18:37 Adam Ah, it's possible, but I doubt it.

1:18:39 Drew It's possible, but you'll see, Kelly. You'll see. And it's just the way it works. I wish we were different.

1:18:45 Caller What's that?

1:18:45 Drew I wish we were different.

1:18:47 Adam We need your dad right here.

1:18:48 Caller I mean, I'm not saying like we want to do it like all the time or anything. I mean, we probably will never do it again. It's not like something that we...

1:18:53 Drew I think your boyfriend, your husband's on to something here, but he's not going to let go.

1:18:57 Adam Go smell his penis, see if he's been down there.

1:18:59 Caller We're usually the ones that instigate it, not him.

1:19:01 Adam Alright, Kelly. It's good news.

1:19:05 Caller Everything's cool. Alright.

1:19:06 Drew Let's see what happens there. Married woman, when the husband comes down and tries to kill Kelly's husband.

1:19:13 Adam Yeah. Kelly's doing a little dance in there.

1:19:16 Drew I noticed.

1:19:19 Adam It can be done. It's just...

1:19:20 Drew It's not Kelly.

1:19:22 Adam No one we ever talk to. It's possible. It's mathematically possible.

1:19:26 Drew It's possible for a while, but eventually there's a price to be paid for this. People want to tell us... Remember when we were in Seattle, we were at University of Washington, that couple stood up and they're telling us how... We're just so close-minded. They've got it so wonderful. And then it started coming out. All the crap in that relationship. And then it's like, okay, well, there it is.

1:19:44 Adam It starts unraveling. Amber?

1:19:46 Yeah.

1:19:46 Adam You're 16.

1:19:47 Caller Yeah.

1:19:48 Caller What's up?

1:19:49 Caller I got hepatitis C and my doctor thinks that it was because when I got my ears pierced at the mall.

1:19:55 Caller Wow.

1:19:56 Drew But that's unusual, but I guess it could happen.

1:19:59 Adam See? See, none of you should be going to the mall. Say breeding ground for hepatitis.

1:20:04 Caller I guess so.

1:20:05 Drew You never had a transfusion?

1:20:06 Caller Huh?

1:20:07 Drew You never had a transfusion?

1:20:08 Caller No.

1:20:09 Drew You never had sex with anybody?

1:20:10 Caller Nope.

1:20:12 Drew Your parents been tested for hepatitis C?

1:20:15 Caller Oh, yeah, they were tested also and they didn't get it either.

1:20:17 Drew Okay. All right. And neither of them had any transfusions or anything like that? Nope.

1:20:22 Caller Nothing like that.

1:20:23 Adam What makes you candidate for a transfusion? Just massive blood loss? How much you got to lose? A couple of quarts.

1:20:31 Drew Depends on your age and what the problem is, yeah.

1:20:34 Adam Hey, Amber?

1:20:35 Caller Yeah.

1:20:36 Adam So, what do you do with this hepatitis C now?

1:20:39 Caller Oh, I have to get like blood tests to see if it's active and just monitor it.

1:20:45 Drew You take interferon or anything like that? You take interferon or anything like that?

1:20:49 Caller No, I'm not taking any drugs or medication for it.

1:20:52 Drew Because it's been inactive?

1:20:54 Caller Yeah, I haven't been active, but I wanted to know how I could like give it to people.

1:20:58 Drew Well, it's transmitted, we believe, in ways very similar to the AIDS virus. Okay, so think about safe sex. That's the way to prevent it from being transmitted. That's nice.

1:21:08 Adam Oh, what a bummer. Who's paging you? Who is that?

1:21:14 Caller My wife.

1:21:17 Caller Ah, all right.

1:21:18 Adam You want to take a break?

1:21:19 Drew Yeah.

1:21:19 Adam Let's just tease one more call. Call your wife. She's drunk, right?

1:21:24 Drew I don't think so.

1:21:24 Adam She's at the party, right?

1:21:26 Drew I don't know. We'll see.

1:21:27 Adam Well, she's going to hang at the party, right?

1:21:29 Drew I don't know. You left her at the party? No, she got a car there.

1:21:34 Adam Lisa said booty call. Could be right. All right. When we come back, we'll speak to Jason. And he's 16. And when he tries to go farther with girlfriends, she says no, because then he'll dump her. He wants to know how to handle this. Wait, Drew, what the hell is that? You got to do better than that. Jennifer, she's 18. She was a virgin, but was raped in December. Now she's been with eight guys since.

1:22:05 Caller All right, that's better.

1:22:06 Adam All right, we'll talk to Jennifer after this. Neat. Loveline. I'm Adam. That is Drew. Forget about the phone number. Let's get back to the phones. I think we're going to talk to Jennifer. Jennifer?

1:22:35 Caller Hi.

1:22:36 Adam You're 18?

1:22:37 Caller Yes.

1:22:37 Adam What's going on?

1:22:38 Caller Well, I wanted to wait till I got married to have sex before, and I had no problem saying no. And then I got raped by someone in one of my classes in December, and it seems like my self-control just went out the window. And I mean, I've had sex with eight different guys, and it was all meaningless, and I just...

1:22:54 Drew Why do you think you needed to do that?

1:22:56 Caller I don't know. It just seems like I don't have much control. I mean, I know I do, but I don't...

1:23:01 Adam What happened with the rape?

1:23:04 Caller Well, we went out to a movie, and then we just parked at a park, and I mean, he started kissing me, and it led to more, and I told him no, and I told him I just got done telling him that I wanted to wait till I got married, and he told me he respected that, and then he just went on with it.

1:23:18 Drew Wow, it's awful.

1:23:19 Adam Did you report him or anything?

1:23:21 Caller No.

1:23:21 Adam How come?

1:23:23 Caller I don't know. I don't think it affected me like I thought it should have. I mean, I didn't tell anyone, and I didn't even cry like I thought I would. It didn't affect me emotionally.

1:23:34 Adam Has anything like that happened to you before?

1:23:37 Caller Not that I know of.

1:23:38 Drew Are you suspicious of anything weird happened to you when you were growing up?

1:23:40 Caller Well, my uncle told me that I might have been molested by one of his friends when I was like three, but I don't have any flashbacks of that.

1:23:48 Adam That's one of those General's Food International coffee moments. You and the uncle sitting down at the back porch with a nice piping hot cup of Swiss mocha in your hand and him explaining about how his buddy Chet, who worked with him at the transmission place, may have gotten in your panties, but he's not sure. And then we just sort of fade up into the starry sky. We just fade into Weedfield. Weedfield.

1:24:11 Caller He smokes a lot of weed.

1:24:12 Adam Oh, that's nice. Why? I wonder why he would even broach that.

1:24:18 Caller I don't know.

1:24:19 Adam Why bring it up? Maybe you got molested by one of my bodies, but I'm not so sure. I mean, what does that mean?

1:24:26 Caller I haven't brought it up.

1:24:27 Drew Well, certainly your behavior as a victim sort of fit that. Well. You're a great victim.

1:24:32 Adam Well, I mean, it's not her fault she got raped.

1:24:35 No, but she didn't report it.

1:24:36 Drew She didn't react to it.

1:24:38 Caller That's true.

1:24:39 Adam What do you think? Were you paralyzed when the guy was sort of thrusting himself on you?

1:24:45 Caller I mean, yeah. Well, at first, I mean, I tried to stop and then I just like my brain seemed to like go dead. I mean, I didn't know what to do.

1:24:53 Adam There you go. Yeah. That's unfortunately people that had been or have been victimized in the past had that reaction.

1:25:02 Drew That's right. That's how they react. So it's highly suspicious. And of course, those victimizers know exactly who to pick and try this crap with.

1:25:09 Adam Yeah. We're going to park. All right. You want to save your Virginia until you're married. Don't worry about it. Yeah. What a bastard.

1:25:16 Caller You know what I mean?

1:25:17 Adam Someone just gets done telling you they want to save themselves for marriage.

1:25:21 Drew I wouldn't be surprised if you're feeling depressed or panic attacks, anything like that.

1:25:26 Caller I get depressed every once in a while. I mean, I have a pretty low self-esteem and I don't think guys like me. But I mean, there are a lot of guys that like me and they've told me lately, but they're just nice guys. And the guys I tend to like are just jerks and they don't show me back that they like me.

1:25:40 Drew Abusers.

1:25:42 Adam Yeah, there's more here than meets the eye, Jennifer. You've got to get into a little counseling, okay?

1:25:49 Caller I told my dad I want to go to counseling and I can't tell him why. He doesn't understand. He thinks I should just talk to someone at church and they'll understand me better.

1:25:57 Drew Tell him your doctor told you to go. What? Tell him your doctor told you to go or you talked to a doctor and he said go.

1:26:03 Caller Okay.

1:26:04 Drew All right?

1:26:04 Adam Yeah, he should understand that.

1:26:06 Drew There's a medical reason.

1:26:07 Adam Yeah. Listen, here's the problem with church. You can't get in any good stuff. You know what I mean? I mean, what do you talk about? You got to go lightweight all the way, right? You can't be talking about raping and masturbation and fornication, all the Asian things. No good. You know what I mean?

1:26:26 Drew What other Asian things are there?

1:26:29 Adam There's fornication, masturbation, Mastication, Mastication, is it cutting a breast? There's obliteration, okay, you're right. Becky? Hello? You're, what is Becky, 14?

1:26:48 Caller Yes.

1:26:49 Adam What's up?

1:26:50 Caller Hello. Okay, I've been dating this guy for about nine months and he broke up with me Sunday for the second time.

1:26:57 Caller Yeah.

1:26:57 Caller And his reason is, it's not me, he still loves me but it's everything and everything can be anything.

1:27:03 Caller Yeah. I just need a guy's perspective about this.

1:27:06 Caller Yeah.

1:27:07 Adam Well, let me explain a guy's perspective.

1:27:09 Caller Okay.

1:27:10 Adam The guy wants to break up.

1:27:12 Caller Yeah.

1:27:12 Adam That's it.

1:27:12 Caller I realize that.

1:27:13 Adam That's it. That's it. Let me, let me explain something. It's a, it's a harsh truth but everyone should listen up. When people want you to make changes, they'll tell you the changes.

1:27:27 Drew Yeah.

1:27:28 Adam You know what I'm saying?

1:27:29 Drew Right.

1:27:29 Adam They'll go, hey, A, B, and C needs to be modified because I really like you. I want to stay with you. I'm unhappy about this department and that department. We'll work on those departments.

1:27:39 Drew Right.

1:27:40 Adam But when someone says, hey, I'm leaving.

1:27:42 Drew That's it. You're leaving.

1:27:43 Adam They're leaving. Now, there's a rare exception. That is, you won't stop drinking. They have left five times already. They've warned you a hundred times. They came home one night. You were stinking drunk. Now you know why they left. Ironically enough, that person, you could get back. Right. Because all you got to do is put down the bottle and they'll come back. The only reason they left is because you picked up the bottle. But the ones that just say, hey, it's over because it's over. It's over. And you can, you can comb through the wreckage, like some sort of, you know, forensic scientists. It doesn't matter. It's over. And don't, don't examine it.

1:28:21 Drew And the more you demand that the relationship be rekindled, the more you've guaranteed your future, which is that this will come back to you twofold. There will happen again. And now you've sort of.

1:28:34 Adam Well, not only, no, sometimes they're just, their resolve grows stronger.

1:28:39 Drew About getting away.

1:28:40 Adam Yeah. And keep coming.

1:28:41 Drew But how about the ones that get, I do this in high school, got it back in and kept it going and going and going. And of course, it was like, you know, keeping something glued together is just falling apart.

1:28:50 Adam Listen, my stripper girlfriend, Lindsay, I mean, you know, I went to Hawaii without her. I came home, you know, I had that gecko t-shirt. I bought her in Hawaii and everything. She was gone. She moved into my grandparents' house.

1:29:02 Drew That's a bizarre move.

1:29:04 Adam Well, my grandparents. Well, you know, you know, the beauty of the Corolla.

1:29:07 Drew Yes, of course.

1:29:08 Adam And we're all equals. Not not within the Corolla family. I mean, just the world that spans its part. It's parts of China. That's Russia. I mean, everybody. There's no God bless the Corollas. They never played favorites. I'll tell you that son, daughter and uncle, father, son. Doesn't matter. It's just that everything will be evaluated on its own. You borrow money from my family. You whenever whatever the criteria is for a guy who lives in Nova Scotia, borrowing money, same same same thing applies 100 percent. So my my grandparents went to Europe for the summer and their house was empty. And basically my girlfriend just moved in there. You know, like I said, according to Corolla, she had just as much right to be there as anyone else. So she was there. Maybe more. I think they liked her more. So she moved in over there. And I moved back into my apartment in North Hollywood and I was so pathetic. And so poor that I had to have a series of roommates. Because the rent was like $7.25 a month. And you know, I could pony up $3.50. But that's, there's no way I was going to make up that extra $3.75, whatever it is. So I kept having these like transient guys come through, not street guys. Just like, hey, John McCann needs a place to stay for two weeks. All right, I'll pro-rate it. That's $182. He'd come in with a box, you know, filled with Denty Moore stew and some socks. And he'd crash out for like two weeks. And he'd get his ass together and he'd move out. And some other guy would move back in for, you know, all in the name of like $150, $170 at a time. So I'm living, living with a string of derelict guys. Meanwhile, my girlfriend, ex-girlfriend's living rent-free over at the grandparents' house. She starts dating a guy she's working with. What a surprise. I worked the whole summer to try to get her back. I mean, I have four months into this thing, nonstop, whole summer, completely wasted. We get back together for about a month and a half.

1:31:08 Drew You start your same old crap.

1:31:10 Adam I think I started while she was on her way over. Jesus Christ, what a mess. What a pathetic mess. Someone should have just killed me back then. It was pathetic, man. Pathetic. I'll never do that again. I'll never be there. That's the good news, everyone. You get older, it gets better. You may look worse, but you feel better.

1:31:33 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:31:34 Adam Christina?

1:31:35 Caller Yeah?

1:31:36 Adam You're 20.

1:31:37 Caller Uh-huh.

1:31:37 Caller What's up?

1:31:39 Caller Well, I've been having a lot of affairs since I was like 18 with married men.

1:31:46 Drew Are you there?

1:31:47 Caller Excuse me?

1:31:48 Drew And what? I'm sorry?

1:31:49 Caller I want to get away from it, but I don't know how.

1:31:52 Drew Somebody break your parents apart?

1:31:54 Caller No.

1:31:55 Caller Where's your dad?

1:31:56 Caller He's still at home.

1:31:58 Adam Why? Do you get along with him?

1:31:59 Caller No.

1:32:00 Drew What happened?

1:32:01 Caller Um, he was just abusive growing up.

1:32:06 Adam What kind of abuse?

1:32:07 Caller Like hitting me.

1:32:08 Adam Oh, all right.

1:32:09 Caller Like he used to, like, hit me with a belt and stuff like that.

1:32:13 Drew Great. All right, well, there you go.

1:32:17 Adam Usually when someone dates married men, it just means they date unavailable men, whether they're incarcerated or married. People, they can't have a relationship back. I think her line went bad.

1:32:31 Caller No, no, wait a minute.

1:32:32 Drew Fine.

1:32:33 Caller Second, I pushed the button. Oh, for Christ's sake. Hold on a second.

1:32:36 Adam Is that fine?

1:32:36 Drew Yeah.

1:32:37 Adam I refuse to sit up and do the show. And I see that.

1:32:40 Drew What was that?

1:32:41 Caller I'm here.

1:32:42 Drew You said something, though.

1:32:43 Caller No.

1:32:44 Adam OK. So do you know what I mean about dating guys that you can't really have a future with?

1:32:48 Caller Yeah. And it's like I choose to because I know that it's never going to go right.

1:32:53 Adam Because you're too scared to get close to them.

1:32:55 Caller Because I was also I was raped when I was 15 years old.

1:32:59 Adam Yeah. What about before anything before that?

1:33:02 Caller Not that I know of. OK.

1:33:04 Drew It's all part of the same process.

1:33:05 Adam Who raped you when you were 15?

1:33:07 Caller A guy that I was dating.

1:33:09 Drew Nice.

1:33:09 Adam Great. They were bringing charges against him?

1:33:12 Caller No.

1:33:12 Caller I didn't.

1:33:14 Caller I was scared to death of him. He threatened to kill me.

1:33:17 Adam You know the scariest part of life is these guys are just rolling around somewhere.

1:33:23 Caller Yeah.

1:33:24 Caller Lots of them.

1:33:26 Caller He worked at a grocery store and he used to threaten me in there.

1:33:31 Adam Yeah. Good. All right. Well, maybe, I don't know, hopefully he got drunk and ran his motorcycle into a pole or something.

1:33:39 Caller Wouldn't that be nice?

1:33:40 Adam It would be nice. It wouldn't be a perfect world if all evil people just get loaded and buy it on a Honda. Wow. That was hot.

1:33:49 Caller All right.

1:33:49 Adam Listen, Christina, I want you to just back off from the dating for a while.

1:33:53 Caller Okay.

1:33:54 Adam Here's the deal. Don't look to men to affirm your life or solve your problems.

1:34:02 Caller Okay.

1:34:03 Adam They're not going to do anything. Stop looking outside of yourself. Just take six months off.

1:34:07 Drew Work on your.

1:34:08 Adam Read a book. Start jogging. Just get on a little routine and just mellow out.

1:34:12 Drew It's called self-care, self-nurturing. Okay.

1:34:14 Caller Okay. Right.

1:34:15 Adam Is that the euphemism for Frost in the Comforter?

1:34:18 Drew Yeah. Which is euphemism for?

1:34:21 Adam Masturbation.

1:34:37 Caller Kneel up.

1:34:39 Caller All right, that is it.

1:34:40 Adam Another fabulous or at least mediocre week of Loveline in the can, as they say. I want to give some special thanks to those who made it possible. First and foremost, Jesus Christ, my personal Lord and Savior. I don't like when people say person, my personal Lord. It's like, hey, hey, what about me, brother? What do I get now? What do I get, chopped liver Christ? You're using my, what about, hey, he's my person. I wonder if a fist fight ever breaks out. This is my personal Lord and Savior. Lisa, who's doing a wonderful job, not only on the phones, but tilting the coffee and booking a guest and doing all that stuff. Because producer, Anne is home now napping for two or three, three and a half. Yeah. So she's a real pregnant. So she said doing the best she can. And I want to thank Anne and I want to thank Anderson for doing a great job, pushing buttons and swamp microphones and doing all that good stuff. Hey, magically, everybody in the mic worked the whole show. So until next time, it's Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. I nailed this guy in the ass once.

1:35:42 Caller This has been Loveline. The views expressed on Loveline are not necessarily those of the staff, the management or the sponsors of this radio station. And you're probably not the views of Westwood One Entertainment. Loveline is produced by Anne Wilkins Engel. Now, please listen to this station longer.

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Thursday, October 7, 1999