Episode 1000754887144

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:12 Hey ho.

1:15 Adam That's my new greeting.

1:17 Drew Oh, am I in? Here we go.

1:18 Yeah.

1:19 Drew You sound like the neighbor of the Simpsons.

1:21 Adam Thank you.

1:21 Drew Hey, hi there, neighbor.

1:23 Voiceover Yeah. Ned Flanders. Hey, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew is a board-certified physician and addiction medicine specialist.

1:35 Drew You got a little bit of a head of steam. What's going on?

1:37 Adam I took a nap, jumped a little rope, feeling good.

1:41 Drew Wow.

1:41 Adam Oh, yes.

1:42 Drew Oh.

1:43 Adam Top of the world, looking down on creation.

1:45 Drew You didn't visit the bunker or anything?

1:48 Adam Yes, actually I did. I went to Sperm Bank today.

1:51 Oh, that's good.

1:53 Drew Oh, yes.

1:53 Adam Good times.

1:54 Drew Did you win?

1:55 Adam No, I can't divulge over the air who won. My partner, Jimmy, in a massiveatory competition. Yeah.

2:04 Drew Yeah, you're feeling good.

2:05 Adam Sperm counts nice. Again, I can't get into details. You'll have to see that on the show. But feeling good. You know how they count sperm?

2:14 Drew Very carefully.

2:14 Adam No, do you know?

2:15 Drew Yeah.

2:15 Adam You know how it works? I was trying to figure out, how do they count the sperm?

2:19 Drew How do they do it? They have a little thing.

2:22 Adam Yeah, but they can't count every million.

2:24 Drew They do per field.

2:25 Adam Yeah. What they do, they have a little grid. I guess they look at it in a microscope. They put a little grid and they see how many are in this grid.

2:34 Drew Yeah.

2:34 Adam And they count those and they put six zeros behind it.

2:37 Drew Yeah.

2:38 Adam That's how they figure out how much sperm you have. So, good times. All right.

2:43 Drew Now you have a little empathy for my experience producing?

2:47 Adam No, I didn't have any difficulty.

2:49 Drew No, no. I mean, did you actually go to a sperm place to produce where they line you up with your bodies?

2:55 Adam No, no. We were in our own. We were in a doctor's office, but there's still, you know, I had to deal with a camera crew. You didn't have to deal with that. All right. Let's hop on the phones. Speak to Melissa. It's 26. Melissa?

3:08 Hi.

3:09 Drew What's up?

3:10 I'm 26.

3:12 I've never had sex before.

3:14 I have no desire. I want to. I look forward to it, but I just have no desire inside to do it.

3:21 Drew Wait a minute. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm confused. You want to or you don't want to?

3:25 I do want to.

3:26 I'm looking forward to it.

3:28 I want to, by the way.

3:28 Drew Hang on a second. Hang on a second. Adam, do you look forward to masturbating? Is that right?

3:33 Adam Yeah.

3:33 Drew You know what I mean? It's not really looking forward to it. That's not like a...

3:35 Adam No. I mean, yes.

3:37 Drew It's like you...

3:37 Adam That's a trick question. That's not fair to me, my testicles.

3:40 Drew You have to. Yeah.

3:42 Adam I, Drew, I...

3:43 Drew No, I'm not going to...

3:44 Adam You're almost a retard in your point making.

3:46 Drew I'm not making my point.

3:47 Adam I'm just exploring. Yeah. But every time you ask me for something, do I ever give you the answer you want?

3:51 Drew What are you intending for?

3:51 Adam Does anybody give you the answer you want?

3:53 Drew Nobody ever cooperates.

3:54 Adam Yes, I look forward to masturbating.

3:56 Drew But the way she says it, it sounds like there's no drive.

3:59 Yeah, that's it. That's exactly it. And what I wanted to ask you was like, how they have... I hear it all over about these pills to increase your sex drive and that...

4:08 Like what?

4:10 Can I see the name of the product?

4:11 Drew These are some things you saw in a magazine?

4:13 No, no, I hear it on the radio all the time.

4:15 No, no, no. I hear it on your show.

4:17 Drew Well, don't...

4:18 Adam I don't care if she mentions it, but listen, here's the point. If you're 26, you're a virgin, no pill is going to help you at this point. There's something going on with you. Now, are you a religious person?

4:31 Caller I was for a while, up until like... and I still am, like my whole... it was like, oh, I'm going to wait till I'm married and all that stuff. But like, Adam, it's not happening. I don't see it happening. I don't see myself like getting married. I don't see myself finding anyone and...

4:45 Drew Do you have problems with relationships?

4:47 Caller Yeah.

4:47 Drew Why?

4:48 Caller Yeah, like I don't... It's not that I come out here in New York.

4:51 Caller It's not that I just have never... I haven't found...

4:54 Caller It's not too picky. Like my cousins tell me I'm picky and all that stuff, but I'm not picky. Like I just want somebody that's like not a felon, someone who's like one of my girlfriends haven't gotten to already, you know?

5:06 Adam Is that right? I see. Your bar is set pretty high. No felons, no ex-boyfriends of your girlfriends. Come on, honey, what do you want? Now listen, how's the rest of your life going?

5:18 Caller Like I'm working. I'm still home, but I'm moving out in May.

5:21 Adam All right. You got to get out.

5:23 Caller Yeah, definitely.

5:24 Drew 26, you're still home.

5:25 Adam All right. All right. Here's the deal. Don't spaz out too much on guys right now. Listen, everybody, here's the magic answer to attracting the person you want to be attracted to you. Work on your life. I know it sounds cliche.

5:39 Drew Get your ass together.

5:39 Adam Move out. You're 26. Get the hell out of the house. Get your career going. Start going to the gym. Lead one of those lives. You ever see the deodorant commercials? Lead that kind of life.

5:50 Drew 110% effective.

5:52 Adam That's right. A lot of rollerblading on the weekends.

5:55 Drew Off-roading.

5:56 Adam Ski-boarding or whatever, wakeboarding and off-road riding, all that good stuff. At the office, try to have a set of plans in your hands all the time. Be pointing at things. Put people around you. Have them nod their head a lot.

6:10 Drew Also, she ought to make sure she's medically okay. She really does sound like there's an absent drive. There could be certain mood problems. There could be certain endocrine problems, pituitary function, that kind of thing.

6:19 Adam Shea? Shea? Caller goes by name of Shea in 23.

6:26 Drew Hey, what's up?

6:26 Caller How are you doing? Good. I had a question.

6:30 Drew Yeah.

6:31 Caller My boyfriend, he's like a computer geek. He runs this website. Lately, he's been really into the role playing thing.

6:45 Drew On the web?

6:46 Caller He makes me.

6:47 Adam Oh, no.

6:47 Caller Oh. No, with me, Dr. Infect.

6:49 Drew I see.

6:50 Adam Yeah.

6:50 Drew What does he make you do?

6:52 Caller He makes me, I have no idea what it means, which is why I'm calling in.

6:57 Adam What's he make you do?

6:59 Caller He makes me say things.

7:02 Drew Like what?

7:03 Caller I have an occlude as to what it means.

7:05 Drew Okay. This could be good. Yeah. I mean, it could be a bogus call, but it could be a clever way to do it. Go ahead. What's he make you say?

7:13 Caller All your base or belong to us? Did you have any idea what that means?

7:19 Drew All your what?

7:21 Caller All your base or belong to us?

7:24 Adam I don't know. Listen, her line sucks. She sucks. I'm done.

7:29 Drew All your base or belongs to us?

7:30 Adam I don't know. Don't care.

7:32 Drew Yeah.

7:32 Adam Just, you know, my new motto is here, cut the losses and move forward.

7:38 Drew Move on, yeah.

7:39 Adam Just cut them and move forward. I don't know what her deal is. Shiloh and her connection is horrible. I can't talk to her.

7:45 Drew Shiloh? Lauren, hang on a second. Lauren, see if you can figure out what the phrase was. Lauren, see if you can figure out what the phrase was that she was trying to communicate to us.

7:54 Adam Yeah, I heard it. It just didn't make any sense. It didn't make any sense to her either.

7:58 Shiloh? Uh-huh.

8:01 I have a question.

8:02 Well, I got two questions.

8:05 How long does chlamydia take in a woman to make them not sterile?

8:10 Drew Well, typically a few months.

8:13 A few months, that's it?

8:14 Drew Well, potentially.

8:15 Okay.

8:16 Drew Then we can harbor it for years, but months is enough in some cases.

8:19 Adam Yeah, but she wants to know the average.

8:22 Drew I don't know the numbers out there.

8:25 Okay, my other question.

8:26 I like been dating this guy for a long time now, and I like shake and want to cry while we're having sex. I don't, and it's not because of an orgasm or because he's too large or anything.

8:43 Drew How about you have some emotional reactions of being sexually active, being close to someone?

8:50 Caller No.

8:52 Adam Well, that didn't sound like much of a no. You ever been traumatized?

8:57 No.

8:58 Drew No one sexually abused you?

8:59 Caller No.

9:00 Drew Never been raped?

9:01 No.

9:02 Drew And you like this guy you're with?

9:03 Yeah, I do a lot. I've been with him for two years, and it never happened.

9:08 Our relationship has been long-distance for like eight months, and I'd come up and visit him like once a month. And like our sex was good, and I would like shake though.

9:19 Drew It could have just been an emotional, sometimes we get emotional and positive emotional reaction like that during sex. Yeah.

9:26 Adam You ever see those preachers who call the guys up to the stage, and you know, they faint.

9:33 Although, they smack you on the forehead with their penis, and they yell, come out.

9:38 Adam And they just collapse. I like sometimes when they don't want to collapse, they actually push them down. It's like, come on, hey, collapse, let's go.

9:44 Drew You're over it. Listen, you opened up with a question about chlamydia. Now, another thing that occurs to me is sometimes when people have infections and you stir the infection.

9:50 No, that was like a question for my friend.

9:52 Adam All right.

9:53 Drew Okay.

9:53 I just-

9:54 Adam All right. So listen, no trauma in the past. You feel good. You love this guy.

10:01 Caller He thinks he's hurting me though.

10:02 He thinks that there's something wrong that he's doing to me.

10:06 Adam All right. But you don't mind it, right?

10:09 Drew No. Just reassure him. That's all. Just reassure the guy. That's a younger man's reaction. Older guys are just, have few guys, few women cry on them. You guys too, probably.

10:19 Adam Sure. Sure. And don't get pregnant. Please don't get pregnant.

10:23 Drew Wear the condom or use birth control.

10:26 Adam John.

10:27 Drew Yeah.

10:27 Adam You're 18. What's up?

10:29 Caller My girlfriend's been on this shop for nine months. And I think it's Debra Vera.

10:34 Drew Yeah.

10:35 Caller I want to know the chances of me getting her pregnant with unprotected sex.

10:39 Drew Very remote. It's the same as a birth control pill.

10:42 Caller Okay. She said that this was the best form of birth control.

10:47 Drew It is one of the best. It is responsible for the drop of the teen pregnancy rate in this country.

10:52 Adam It is? Yeah. I thought that was us.

10:54 Drew Well, we've been part of it too. We've sent them to get the shots.

10:57 Adam Thank you.

10:58 Caller So there's no way?

10:59 Drew No, it's not no way. It's very, very, very unlikely.

11:03 Adam Hey, John.

11:04 Drew Almost no way.

11:04 Adam I'll tell you what. If you two have a kid, Drew will raise it as his own. That's the kind of guarantee he's going to put on this step up.

11:10 Drew Well, this child will be the chosen one.

11:12 Adam Absolutely.

11:13 So it's a good chance that I won't.

11:16 Drew Not just good, it's excellent. Yeah.

11:18 Okay. I appreciate it.

11:20 Adam Right there, John. Pull out anyway, just for fun. Yeah. Good times.

11:24 Drew For the camera? Yeah. Nice.

11:27 Adam Yeah. Posterity.

11:28 Drew Bob?

11:29 Hey.

11:30 Adam Hey, you're 28. What's up?

11:31 Caller How's it going, guys?

11:32 Drew Good.

11:33 Caller Hey, I'm very sorry. I fibbed about my question, but I'll make this quick. I've been listening to LoveLine for about four and a half years ever since I moved out to the valley. I'm a big fan. Right. However, a couple of months ago, I had this great idea, stroke a genius idea for a book, The Wit and Wisdom of Adam Carolla. For about a month, I monitored the show and just gleaned the pithiest comments from Adam. I have some sample pages. I thought I'd fax them over. If Adam, you like the idea, hey, we could talk about it.

12:02 Adam Listen, you write that book and I will buy it.

12:05 Drew Yeah. Adam is so lazy. You could just go ahead and write it.

12:07 Caller Exactly. Could I fax it over? You want to take a look?

12:10 Adam Why don't you send it over? How many pages you got?

12:14 Caller It's about six pages, but they're just sample pages.

12:17 Adam Why don't you wait till you get to ten pages and then send it over?

12:20 Caller Well, no, I mean, I wanted you to see the kind of thing I had in my head.

12:23 Adam All right. We'll give you the fax.

12:25 Drew I'd like to see it.

12:26 What the hell?

12:28 Adam I don't know.

12:29 Drew We have a new fax. Yes, that is it.

12:31 Caller Okay, I'll send it over now.

12:32 Thanks.

12:32 Drew Okay.

12:32 Adam All right, buddy. Take care of yourself.

12:35 Drew There you go.

12:36 Adam I'm always disappointed when I hear myself.

12:38 Drew Enjoy.

12:41 Adam Henry? Yeah. Hey, Drew, you want to hear something funny? What? Somebody accused me today of somebody came into my office and said that somebody with the, what do they call that? Computer name? What do they call that?

12:55 Drew Screen name?

12:55 Adam Screen name, whatever. Adam Corolla has been bombarding their show with hateful things. What show? Was it the X Show?

13:03 Drew Yeah.

13:03 Adam And I was saying a bunch of things and was my screen name. Now, what do you think?

13:09 Drew Well, first of all, I said, I don't care.

13:11 Adam Right.

13:11 Drew Then you said, what's a computer?

13:13 Adam That's right. Listen, anybody who reads anything on a computer that has my name on it, or anytime anyone is on a computer and you think you're talking to me and there's someone who says they're talking to me, I guarantee you it is not me because I've never been on a computer. Henry?

13:31 Yeah.

13:31 Adam You're 15. What's up?

13:33 Caller I know what All Your Base are belongs to us means. It's a mistranslation of a video game opening. About 1990, a video game called Zero Wing came out in Japan. It was really popular. They tried to translate it into English and something got messed up.

13:51 Adam Oh, yeah.

13:52 Caller So there's been this video circulating on the Internet that has the English version of the opening, that has a whole bunch of really messed up, you know, English phrases.

14:03 Adam Right. Sometimes the translation doesn't work. Like I was at Arcade One playing a game called Violence Fight. And I stared at the title for like ten minutes and I thought, who names their video game Violence Fight? And then I realized, there's some Korean company who just, it seemed right.

14:20 Drew Yeah.

14:21 Adam You know, someone got an English dictionary, looked it up and it seemed like it would work. So this is a translation that didn't work.

14:27 Caller Yep.

14:28 Drew Is there some cult meaning to it? Why would some guy be asking his girlfriend to repeat that?

14:32 Caller It's just been circulating around the internet and there's been like some extended remixes of it. I've even seen a version of it where it had the video sequence running by and it had the Budweiser commercial where a whole bunch of people are going, what's up? Playing in the background to it.

14:54 Adam All right. Thank you, Henry. We appreciate you shedding light on that.

14:57 Drew I'm enlightened.

14:58 Caller There you go.

14:59 Drew I feel connected with modern culture.

15:00 Adam Thank God you thought to follow up on that one. Leo?

15:04 Caller Oh, hey.

15:04 Adam You're 16.

15:06 Caller Yeah. Well, first of all, let me say-

15:11 Adam I don't believe him already.

15:13 Drew Hang on a second.

15:14 Caller I was like sort of BSing you guys.

15:16 Adam Yeah.

15:17 Caller But my stepdad and my mom also, like they're kind of like, they will walk around like the house and stuff, like without their clothes on.

15:27 Drew Have you told them you don't like it?

15:31 Adam Yeah. I don't believe that guy. I don't listen.

15:34 Drew Let's go back to Shay. I want to hear about that phrase again.

15:36 Adam Really?

15:37 Drew I just want to talk to her real quick.

15:38 Adam Her line sucks.

15:39 Drew Shay? Yeah? So, did you hear that call? Did you hear that expl-

15:45 Caller Don't you believe me?

15:46 Drew We believe you, but we still don't understand why he says it.

15:50 Caller I don't understand why he says it either.

15:53 Adam Okay. Hey, Drew, let me tell you something about radio and stuff. People are listening now. They don't know what the hell Shay is talking about. I barely know what she's talking about. You know what I'm saying?

16:03 Drew Yeah.

16:03 Adam Alright. Thanks, Shay.

16:04 Caller Okay. Well, what do I do then?

16:06 Drew Tell them you don't want to say it.

16:08 Adam You got a boyfriend that wants you to do things you don't want to do, right? Don't do them.

16:12 Drew There you go.

16:14 Caller Okay. Great.

16:15 Adam Great. Should we go back to her later on in the evening?

16:17 Drew We'll keep our whole phone on. Yes.

16:18 Adam Great.

16:19 Drew Nice.

16:19 Caller Mike?

16:20 Yes.

16:21 Adam You're 22. What's up?

16:22 Caller Well, I found out that recently I had an STD genital warts and I was curious for Dr. Drew.

16:32 I didn't know if he knows this or not. If you were to have intercourse, will it spread up inside of you?

16:37 Drew Inside the woman?

16:39 No, inside the man because I have all my anus.

16:42 Drew Oh, that's not good.

16:44 That's not good?

16:45 Drew No. They can get into your urethra so they can go up inside your penis and they can get kind of into the opening of the anus there. But the real issue with the anus is that they can cause anal cancer when you get much older.

16:58 Adam Yeah, good time.

16:58 Drew So it is important that you control these, get them treated.

17:00 Adam Yeah. How does one get the warts in one's anus, Drew?

17:04 Drew Well, you place a wart against it.

17:07 Adam I see. What might that wart be attached to?

17:09 Drew Oh, penis.

17:12 Adam Do tell. All righty. So you got to get that looked at, right? Yeah. Drew, how about burning that anus wart off?

17:19 Drew Well, how about burning the penis wart off?

17:22 Caller I would much...

17:23 Adam Listen, you're a doctor. What do you want to work on? A penis or an anus?

17:27 Caller Come on.

17:28 Drew I don't want anything that ends with S. But be that as it may, you can just interfere on it. There's all sorts of things that can be done beyond burns.

17:34 Adam We got penis, anus, mucus. What are the other S's that are bad times?

17:40 Drew They're bad times?

17:41 Adam Well, you hear that us at the end and you know there's trouble. That is or the us. Yeah.

17:47 Drew Bad times.

17:49 Adam Uterus. Another thing to steer clear of.

17:51 Drew You know, words in uterus.

17:53 Adam Alright, wait a second.

17:55 Drew The reason I went to this one, because there was nothing else up there.

17:59 Adam Lucy, you're 18. What's up?

18:03 Caller Well, I experienced like pain during intercourse with my boyfriend and the thing is that I think it's psychological.

18:10 Drew Lucy, hang on a second. Have we not had physical dyspheronia, pain with air course? We've had like dyspheronia a week.

18:16 Adam Yeah.

18:17 Drew Yeah. Lots of this. Yeah. You think it's psychological. Why?

18:21 Caller Because like I was sexually abused when I was younger.

18:24 Drew Well, that's a way to get it.

18:25 Caller And like my boyfriend's been really, he's really supportive of me and so like everything works out okay because we're in a good relationship. But like it's just difficult because I don't think that it necessarily has to do with physical stuff because like whenever I get upset about anything is kind of when it happens. Like later in the day, Sure.

18:43 like to try to have sex after I've been emotionally upset.

18:46 Caller Then that's when it happens.

18:47 Adam Who's sexually abused you?

18:50 Like a neighbor boy.

18:52 Caller He was older than me. I was like five or six and he was a teenager.

18:57 Drew Happened once?

18:58 Caller It happened for like a year.

19:01 Drew Amazing that repetition compulsion.

19:03 Adam I'm sure he's got his own family now.

19:05 Drew Yeah.

19:06 Yeah.

19:07 Adam Form of the construction trade.

19:09 Drew Abuse farm.

19:09 Caller Anyway. Yeah. I've done a lot of work to help myself through it. Kind of like I'm a volunteer for the sexual assault support services.

19:19 Drew Great. Fabulous.

19:20 Caller Just like I've done a lot of stuff and so I feel like I'm over it in some ways but like sexually it's still really hard and I'm just not sure how to work through this.

19:29 Drew There's two things. One is a piece of advice. One is to make sure that you get checked out medically to be sure there's not something else there, right?

19:34 Caller Okay.

19:35 Drew Because you are blaming it on something that you have to prove that that's what it is or exclude other things. But secondly, my hope for the next 20 years is that we'll really learn what the biology of early childhood trauma is and how these traumatic experiences etch in a biology into your central nervous system. It's obvious that the pathways are established that are not supposed to be there.

19:56 Adam My hope for the next 20 years is that we can invent something called the karaoke where we can sing karaoke in the car when we're commuting to work.

20:04 Drew Car karaoke, yes, yes.

20:06 Adam Car karaoke, car karaoke, yeah.

20:08 Shut up, karaoke.

20:10 Adam Jesus Christ.

20:11 Drew I thought you were talking about an ejaculator. I thought you'd be interested in it.

20:14 Adam That's another thing my team is working on. All right. Lucy, is karaoke good enough for you or do we got to call it car karaoke?

20:23 Caller No, I think karaoke is good.

20:25 Thank you.

20:26 Adam Thank you very much. Thanks, Drew.

20:32 Drew Was it Shantel?

20:34 Adam What's your name, person, caller?

20:36 Drew Shantel. Shantel, I hate to...

20:38 Adam Shantel. Ah, OK. What's happening there, Shantel? You're 17.

20:42 Caller Yeah. I like, um, like about for a month straight, I dressed myself in my sleep. I, like, go to bed and because it's cold in my room, so I'd go to bed in, like, a jacket and more clothes and everything, and I'd wake up in just my underwear. And I don't remember anything that happened at night or anything.

21:05 Drew Well, you got hot during the night.

21:05 Adam Well, you're obviously being raped by a ghost. I mean, that's the only logical explanation.

21:11 Drew We don't talk about ghosts and angels.

21:13 Adam Yes, angels rape on occasion, too. Yes. So, you go to bed, it's cold, you get hot in your sleep and you take this stuff off.

21:24 Caller No, because it's, like, still cold and I don't even wake up, though.

21:27 Adam What's up with you? You don't have heat in your trailer?

21:30 Caller Oh, well, we have a fire place in the other fire pit in the middle.

21:36 Caller No, no, no.

21:37 Adam You burn tires at night?

21:38 Caller No, no, no. I would stow and...

21:41 Drew Wood stove?

21:43 Caller What stove?

21:43 Drew Wood burning stove?

21:44 Adam What sentry are you calling from? Who is this? Grizzly Adams?

21:49 Drew Benjamin Franklin?

21:51 Caller No, I can't stand to sleep with my bedroom door open, so I have to keep it shut so the heat doesn't get into my room.

21:57 Adam All right. Why can't you sleep with your bedroom door open?

22:00 Caller I don't know. I feel uncomfortable.

22:02 Drew That's more revealing to us than anything else.

22:04 Adam That's a bad sign. Boy, are you scared someone is going to come in?

22:09 Caller No, no.

22:10 Adam Is anyone ever come in?

22:11 Caller No.

22:12 Adam I don't understand why a 17-year-old girl would be scared to sleep with the door open.

22:18 Caller I don't know. I just don't like having it open ever. Even when I'm in my room, I can't stand to have it open.

22:24 I have to have it shut.

22:25 Adam Where's your dad?

22:26 Caller Dead.

22:27 What happened?

22:29 Adam Carbon monoxide poisoning.

22:30 Caller No, he got murdered.

22:33 Drew That's going to make you feel funny about people attacking. What happened?

22:37 Caller He's a drug addict. A chick made him OD. She doped him up and killed him.

22:45 Drew She doped him up and killed him? Drug addicts overdose all the time.

22:49 Caller Well, no. I live with my grandparents now.

22:51 Drew They try to do drug addicts overdose. That's how they die. It's a common thing. Chambaloochee, somebody injected him.

22:57 Adam Some chick doped him up too.

22:59 Caller Yeah. Alright.

22:59 Adam So, where are you living? What part of the country?

23:03 Caller Nevada.

23:04 Adam And your grandparents live in a kind of rustic home?

23:09 Caller No, it's a nice house.

23:10 Drew But you said it was a wood-burning stove.

23:12 Caller Yeah, because they don't get a lot of money and it's too expensive to run the heater.

23:19 Adam Okay. Alright. Well, why not burn pallets from the supermarket? Save yourself some gas. Hey, Chantelle, you gotta leave your door open so you can get a little heat in there. And then go to bed in a pair of sweatpants and good times. I have another question. Alright. I'm not sure what she wanted to get at with that. I know she's got another question. I'm scared it's going to be sort of nothing, although we know she's been through a lot, but she's not really copping to anything. Do you think this next one's going to be a good one?

23:52 Drew If history is any judge.

23:55 Adam It won't be. But we're such suckers. Chantelle, what's the next problem?

24:01 Caller Well, about a couple of years ago, I just got really sick one day. And I just kept throwing up. And after that, I like, every other day, I'll just throw up out of nowhere repeatedly. And it's happened for like three years. And like about a couple weeks ago, about maybe a month, I got so sick one day, I just started throwing up over and over again. And they had to take me to the doctor. And the hospital couldn't find anything that was wrong with me. They did blood tests and everything.

24:36 Drew Well, if you're vomiting every other day, there's something wrong. And if it's not medical, it's psychiatric. And it needs to be dealt with.

24:43 Adam You think it's every other day?

24:45 Drew Even if it's once a week.

24:46 Adam Here's the point. It could be an emotional thing. Your father was a junkie who was killed by a hooker. I mean, look into some therapy. Spend some of the money that you're currently spending on heating or saving on heating and put it towards some therapy. Talk to your grandparents. We'll be back.

25:06 Caller Love Line with Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew.

25:13 Tonight Love Line is brought to you by Car Toys. On 947 NRK, the New Rock Alternative.

25:22 Caller I'm glad you're here.

25:35 Drew What's the other choice?

25:36 Adam Alright. Hey, it's LoveLine, I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there.

25:42 Drew See, we do care too much. You do too.

25:45 Adam I care immensely. Drew and I were just sitting here during the commercial break, trying to figure out why more people aren't interested in the psychological condition and bettering themselves. Because let me tell you something, everybody, that's all you got. Your emotions, your psychological condition, that is your survival pack for life. That's the difference between good relationships, good jobs, good life. That's it.

26:12 Drew But why aren't people who are involved in creating media interested in...

26:18 Adam I have no idea.

26:19 Drew At least sort of making you look at the world differently or experience it differently. A little bit. Just make you think for a second.

26:25 Adam I don't know.

26:25 Drew Or at least portray reality accurately.

26:28 Adam I have no idea. But we're disgusted with all of you, right, Drew?

26:32 Drew But that's nighttime.

26:33 Adam Stacey? Yes.

26:34 Yeah. Hi.

26:35 Adam You're 19.

26:37 Caller I'm 19.

26:37 Caller What's up? Okay.

26:40 Caller First off, the whole music is excellent. That's station. But about three months ago, I was taken to the hospital and I was told that I was about to die because I have an extensive blood clot in my thigh. In your where? In my thigh, right by my genitalia-like area.

27:00 Drew In your thigh?

27:02 Caller Yeah. Way up in my thigh, like my groin area. It's blocked up my entire leg. It was completely swollen and fat and obnoxiously painful.

27:10 Drew Your leg was swollen up?

27:11 Caller Yeah.

27:12 Caller I'm worried about it going to my heart and my lung. So I was there for 10 days and I'm on blood centers and doing all these tests. Now, I've known my boyfriend for eight months and every time I have sex, one, I'm not into it. Like I don't want to have sex.

27:28 Drew Because you're freaked out about having been sick?

27:30 Caller No. Well, I was taking off hormones. I was on birth control. I got the blood clock because I was smoking cigarettes and I was on birth control and it's like a risk factor.

27:39 Drew That's still rare at 19, like unheard of rare in fact. I hope they're going through an exercise to try to figure out whether or not there's something else putting you at risk.

27:48 Caller I've had so many tests. They pretty much came to the conclusion that with the amount of cigarettes I was smoking and my hormones, I just happened to be at the right place at the right time.

27:58 Drew Did you see a hematologist?

28:00 Caller I saw everyone and anyone in the hospital. My brother-in-law is a doctor, called him the best people. So to CAT scan, I had the lactites or whatever. I don't know.

28:11 Adam The lactites. They found that in your cave.

28:15 Caller I don't know, the little things that hang off the blood clot.

28:18 Drew Stacey is going to be a doctor too, you see.

28:19 Adam All right, Stacey.

28:21 Drew What's the question?

28:22 Caller Basically, I now have, I understand that like psychologically, I'm not wanting to have stuff right now because I'm unprotected. And I'm allergic to spermicide, which makes it a little more difficult for me to have sex. I understand that part, but I don't get off. Like I can't get any physical pleasure anymore from sex since I've come out of the hospital.

28:40 Drew How long have you been in the hospital?

28:42 Caller It's been about three and a half months.

28:44 Drew And you're on Coumadin now?

28:46 Caller I'm on Coumadin.

28:47 Drew Anything else?

28:49 Caller I take Zoloft, but I was...

28:50 Drew The Zoloft shuts you down completely.

28:52 Caller But I was taking that before I went in.

28:54 Drew Maybe it's interacting with the Coumadin and increasing the Zoloft levels. And that's why it's the Zoloft, I guarantee it.

29:00 Adam You were enjoying sex before the hospital?

29:02 Caller I was totally enjoying sex before the hospital.

29:04 Drew But I guarantee you it's something to do with the Zoloft.

29:07 Adam Yeah.

29:08 Drew I guarantee it.

29:09 Adam What's up? Why do you need the Zoloft?

29:13 Caller Part of it, depression, whatever you go through, and they gave it to me. And we're not really sure if it's the right medication, but they don't want to take me off of it because I'm on Lecomidin.

29:22 Drew How much Zoloft do you want?

29:24 Caller I'm 50 milligrams a day.

29:26 Drew Okay. I'm sure it's the Zoloft.

29:28 Caller Is there other, like, antidepressants that one...

29:31 Drew Yes. Yes. Write these down. Welbutrin.

29:35 Caller Oh, yeah?

29:36 Drew Serizone. And Remeron. And those three do not to do with your sexual functioning so much, if at all.

29:44 Adam Good times. Jennifer?

29:46 Drew Yes?

29:46 Adam You're 23.

29:47 Caller Yes, I am.

29:48 Adam What's up?

29:48 Caller Um, actually, first, Adam, I want to tell you that my friend David, like, totally loves you.

29:53 Adam All right. Finally, some dudes.

29:56 Caller No, not like that way. He just, like, idolizes you. I hear about you all the time from him.

30:00 Drew I'm so sorry, Jennifer. What's up?

30:02 Caller Um, okay. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for a little over a year now. And it's like, how it is, one day it'll be, or like for like a week, it'll be totally perfect. He'll be like, totally in love with me. Oh, I love you, blah, blah, blah. And then, like, for a couple of days, he'll, like, shut down.

30:20 Adam Yeah.

30:20 Caller Like, you know, he won't call or, you know...

30:23 Adam How old is he? Yeah.

30:25 Drew Yeah. Normal 26-year-old behavior.

30:27 Adam Guys do that.

30:28 Caller Oh, really?

30:28 Adam Yeah.

30:28 Caller So it's nothing to, like, freak out. I mean, like, the thing is, he's been married to before.

30:32 Drew Ooh.

30:34 Adam And how did that go?

30:35 Caller Well, they were only married for, gosh, less than a year.

30:39 Drew Is he sort of just nice to you when he wants sex?

30:42 Caller No. No. I mean, no.

30:45 Drew No, no. Yes.

30:45 Caller Yeah.

30:47 Caller Well, I mean, I mean.

30:48 Drew Yes.

30:49 Caller It's a part of our relationship, of course.

30:50 Drew But is that, but just think about the timing of these things. Is he nice leading up to that and then disappears for a couple of days?

30:56 Caller No. No.

30:57 Adam When he comes over, does he come into the house or does he just push his penis through the male slot?

31:04 Caller Um, no. He comes in the door, hey, how you been? How's your day?

31:07 Adam I see. He bangs you in the entry hall and then he leaves?

31:10 Caller Yeah, basically, no. Not at all. It's not even like that.

31:13 Adam All right. What's he do for a living?

31:14 Caller Um, he's a mechanic.

31:16 No.

31:17 Adam That's bad.

31:18 Caller No, he's a good mechanic.

31:21 Adam Yeah. Still bad. Still bad sign. All right, Jennifer.

31:25 All right.

31:26 Adam Listen, this is this is what 26-year-old guys do. The the the I'll tell you something that'll help.

31:33 Caller What?

31:33 Adam And jump in if you disagree here, Drew. The less pressure you put on him, the more apt he'll be to hang around.

31:40 Drew Well, that's what I was thinking. Either it starts getting a little too close for him and he leaves or he's aiming just for the sex, gets it and leaves one or the other.

31:48 Adam No. Yeah, I know what you're saying. And I know that's your angle because you're passionate, passionate man, especially 26, you really have a passion going. But guys, or at least I'll speak from personal experience, they feel a little crowded, they feel like they need their space and then the woman starts encroaching on it because she gets insecure and nervous. She wants to know what's going on and he really folds up tent and leaves town. If you just say, hey, you need your space, good, I'll be over here watching TV. The guy will come back around again. So ladies, don't give them the full court press when they start, when they start retreating. Let them retreat and then they'll slow down. Thank you. Zoe.

32:28 Caller Hi, Adam. Hi, Drew. Adam, I want to tell you that your nasally drone is music to my ears.

32:34 Adam Thank you.

32:34 Caller How? Dr. Drew, I admire you immensely.

32:37 Drew Okay, Zoe, what's going on?

32:38 Caller My question is, I want to know how I can tell if I'm cured from past child sexual abuse.

32:45 Drew Well, there's no cure.

32:46 Adam Well, we'll tell you whether you're cured.

32:47 Caller Relationship. I mean, my boyfriend's worried about this being an issue, but I don't think it is. And I'll tell you why. I was abused by a cousin when I was about six or seven for just a little while. Not bad. No penetration. Just kind of molesting.

33:01 Drew Touching.

33:02 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

33:03 Adam General molestation.

33:04 Caller And now our sex life is really good, but it's rather kind of kinky, freaky and wild.

33:09 Adam Is that you and your cousin or?

33:10 Caller No, me and my boyfriend.

33:11 Adam I see. I see. And the cousin.

33:14 Caller No, no, I don't see my cousin.

33:15 Adam How old was he when you were six?

33:18 Caller He was in his twenties.

33:19 Caller Ooh.

33:22 Adam What a dynamite individual. I'd really love to meet him.

33:24 Caller I want to tell you one more thing. I was exposed to a lot of pornography when I was younger.

33:29 Drew That's yeah.

33:30 Caller So I didn't feel bad about being sexually molested. I was like, fine. I was like, okay, let's try it. You know, I wasn't, I never said no and I was never scared.

33:37 Adam You know, I really, you know what I like to do with this cousin ears. I like to cut his nuts off with some lineman dykes, put it on one of those batting tees, smack him, give myself a nice softball bat and just whack, just whack one right into the gap between right and center field.

33:53 Caller When I was a kid, I didn't think there was anything wrong with it.

33:56 Drew I know. Zoe, you've not been treated at all for your sexual abuse.

33:59 Caller No.

34:00 Drew Right.

34:00 Caller I've treated myself.

34:01 Drew No, there's no such thing as treating oneself.

34:03 Caller I'll tell you, I had sex at a young, I mean, I had like...

34:07 Drew This is the story, this is sexual compulsivity. This is how you become a sexual compulsive. This is how sexuality becomes a little, needs high levels of arousal, high levels of intensity and frequency in order to be okay. You'll tend to sexualize your feelings a lot. A lot, they'll be thinking about sex a lot. Everything, when you have a feeling, it will immediately go towards the sexual.

34:25 Caller But I think that I've got it pretty much controlled and I want to get your take on if I did or not. We have sex and sometimes it's like cracking the ass once in a while, or little bites here and there, but never...

34:37 Drew Listen, Zoe...

34:39 Adam Hold on, let her finish. I'm getting wood. Keep going.

34:41 Caller No, we have like... If I say... We've got code words. If I say, don't do that, or I say the code word, that means it hurts or please stop. But we don't have sex frequently. We don't have to have sex every time we see each other. We don't have wild sex every time, maybe like once in every...

34:57 Adam Hold on, Zoe, let me ask you something. I brought this up before with the rough trade folks, sexually, the code word.

35:05 Caller Yes.

35:05 Adam See, I got a code word and it works in the bedroom, it works in the office, it works out on the street, you know what it is? Hey, stop, I'm serious now.

35:14 Drew I'm serious.

35:15 Adam I'm serious.

35:16 Drew No.

35:16 Adam That's the only code you need is the I'm serious.

35:19 Caller He loves football and ours is a football player code word.

35:22 Adam I know, but why do you got to yell out Booby Clark's name? Is he still in the NFL?

35:29 Caller No, it's not even like, I mean, it's just like.

35:32 Adam I know. Okay, listen.

35:34 Drew Are you going to be having trouble being monogamous?

35:35 Caller No, I had trouble before, but this is my second long-term relationship, and I was monogamous with my first one for four years.

35:43 Adam All right. Listen, Zoe, here's what we have to say about this. You're a smart person, and smart people can.

35:52 Drew Rationalize.

35:54 Adam Smart people can become pretty functional because they have a high IQ, and you're doing just fine for someone who's been through what you've been through. But you're not interested in doing just fine. I mean, you want to do better, right?

36:05 Caller Yes.

36:07 Adam Why then treat yourself? I mean, you're doing all right, but all right isn't good enough. Why don't you get a little therapy and really work on it?

36:15 Caller We are going to because we want to get married, and we're going to get a relationship counselor. But I just don't think it's an issue anymore, but he thinks it is.

36:23 Drew Well, it almost has to be. Almost. Not necessarily, but it almost has to be. And I'm not worried about it. I think it will be fine. But it's likely to have an effect at some point. And why not have that evaluated and see if you can't manage that better?

36:41 Adam I mean, listen, if your partner thinks it's an issue, then it's an issue in a certain sense. You know what I'm saying?

36:47 Drew He's freaked out in some way. She's doing something else that she's not even aware of, probably.

36:50 Adam Well, they're into like biting and poking, and they got a code word. There's a football player. You really want to be yelling out a 300 pound black man's name when you're in bed with someone. I got to find out who this guy is. Who's the player?

37:08 Caller If I say it, then he'll know. Okay. I'm from Washington. I don't think he's listening. It's Tuiya Sopo.

37:18 Drew That's good comedy, isn't it?

37:19 Adam Really?

37:20 Drew Yeah.

37:20 Adam Yeah.

37:21 Caller He'll die if he knows he was on.

37:23 Drew All right.

37:24 Adam That's the quarterback for Washington.

37:25 Drew Yeah.

37:26 Caller That is.

37:26 Caller Yes.

37:27 Caller He won the Rose Bowl this year.

37:28 Adam All right, baby.

37:29 Caller Okay.

37:29 Adam Happy slapping. There you go. Good times. Yeah. What a name to yell out, by the way.

37:36 Drew That's what's funny.

37:37 Adam I couldn't... Unless you get a couple glasses of wine in me and a butt plug, and there's no way I'm getting Tuiya Sopo out. I'm getting like Tuiya Sopo. Sopo Loveline. Sturi Loveline.

37:51 Caller Are you kidding?

37:52 All right.

37:53 Adam Michelle?

37:53 Drew Let's break that.

37:54 Adam Oh, it is? Yeah. Hey, Michelle? Oh, wait. That's not Michelle. It's Michael.

37:59 Drew Michael?

38:00 Caller Yeah.

38:00 Adam You're 19?

38:01 Caller Yes.

38:02 Drew Just hold on a second.

38:03 Caller All right.

38:04 Drew Okay.

38:04 Caller All right.

38:04 Hey, Dr. Drew.

38:05 Drew Hey, Michael.

38:05 Adam Yeah. Hang on.

38:06 Thanks for coming to UCI.

38:07 Drew Oh, it was fun.

38:08 Adam Good times. Hold on. He has a very interesting philosophical type question that we'll get to after this.

38:17 Caller Loveline. We'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

38:21 Caller Uh, yeah. You're listening to that Loveline show with Adam and Dr. Corolla right here on 94.7 NRK. The New Rock Alternative.

38:55 Drew Hey, we'll talk more about it later.

38:58 Adam LoveLine, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Where are we going?

39:09 Drew We'll go Justin first, and then Michael.

39:11 Adam All right, Justin, then Michael. All right. Justin. Hey, you're 15, stoner. What's up?

39:19 Drew Oh boy. Woo. You got to lay off the pot, dude.

39:22 Caller Me and my girlfriend were having anal sex, right?

39:24 Drew 15.

39:25 Adam Yeah, I don't even believe him.

39:26 Drew I don't either, but I know he smoked a pot though.

39:30 Caller And the little piece between her vagina and her ass.

39:34 Adam Yeah, ripped right open, right?

39:36 Caller No, it didn't rip wide open. It ripped a little, and she was bleeding for at least an hour.

39:40 Drew No, you can't rip there.

39:40 Adam Oh.

39:41 Drew Yeah, you can rip there.

39:42 Adam Bad times.

39:43 Caller Well, she did.

39:44 Drew Yeah, no, you can rip there. 15.

39:46 Caller What should we do?

39:48 Drew You know, listen to Jason, Justin. I feel like an alien from the X-File who just came down upon someone wants to pick him up and study him.

39:56 Adam Yeah.

39:57 Drew You know, we got to take this Justin and lay him out on a table.

39:59 Adam Dissect him.

40:00 Drew Dissect him, yeah.

40:01 Adam Stoner autopsy.

40:02 Drew Stoner, yeah, stonerotomy.

40:03 Adam That was a Fox special. Stoner autopsy. You carefully remove the bandana and the OP shorts, and you just keep going.

40:14 Drew Justin, did you take your girl? How old is your girlfriend?

40:16 She's 15 too.

40:17 Adam Yeah.

40:19 Drew I don't want to think about it. Did you take her to the doctor?

40:22 No, she didn't want to go. She was embarrassed.

40:25 Drew Well, she can continue to have problems as a result of that tear. And it can be kind of serious as time goes along.

40:31 Adam Jesse, you're staying away from that area now, right?

40:34 Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're staying away from the whole thing.

40:36 Drew Great powers of deduction Justin has there, even with through the fog of the marijuana.

40:42 Adam I believe he thinks that there's some sort of anus god that is punishing him, and that's why he's staying away from that area.

40:49 Drew I think that his question is, can he does it unzip? I mean, if it starts opening from one end, he gets something going the other side.

40:56 Adam What about it? It ripped a little or there was some bleeding. She feels okay now.

41:01 Caller She says it's hard to walk and it hurts.

41:04 Drew Yeah, she's got to be sane, Justin. She really does.

41:08 Adam Drew, imagine your 15-year-old daughter comes limping into the living room. What's the matter, honey? You take a spill on your pony? No. Someone give you a Charlie Horse? No. You fell down ice skating. No. Just a good cornhole in from my stoner boyfriend. I have to take her to the hospital.

41:32 Drew Let's celebrate. But were you and I talking about this the other day, that there was a TV show that Oprah or something about girls falling off bikes and ripping their Heimans? Did you hear about this?

41:43 Adam I did hear somebody discussing this, but I don't think it was us. Is this going somewhere?

41:50 Drew I don't know why I brought it up, but just because this seems to be having lots of talk about perineal trauma.

41:55 Adam She has to go get herself checked out.

41:58 Drew Yes.

41:58 Adam And she should say whatever she feels like saying, but whoever is looking at her will know what the truth is, right?

42:06 Drew Well, it doesn't matter how she got it. Right. Just that she can say what every other patient says that gets something in the anus or about the anus, which is she landed on it or something, she sat on something.

42:16 Adam Michael, you're 19 years old. What's up?

42:23 Well, Dr. drew.com, thanks for coming to the Brent Event Center at UCI. It was great to meet you.

42:27 Drew It was my pleasure. I had a good time there. I spoke at Irvine in their sort of basketball stadium and I realized, I forgot to mention this when I was there, the last time I was at the sort of, it was a basketball stadium, a different one, but the last time I was at Irvine in the basketball stadium, it was in 1974 to watch Jackson Brown.

42:45 Caller Wow.

42:46 Drew Is that amazing?

42:46 Caller Hold on.

42:47 Adam For those of you who were born in this century, Jackson Brown is a folk singer who was very popular in Drew's heyday. Wow. What's up, Michael?

42:57 While I was waiting, I tried to look up workaholics on drdrew.com and there's nothing comes up.

43:02 Drew Well, you're right. I should describe myself in great detail there. My name should come up when you- All right.

43:06 I should go on to the biography first.

43:07 Drew That's right.

43:09 So my question was, do workaholics and alcoholics get classified together? What the one time I called AA, the guy said, yeah, of course. I'm an alcoholic, my dad was a workaholic, his dad was an alcoholic. It's all the same thing.

43:23 Drew Well, it depends how you define workaholism. There's no doubt that the genetic basis of alcoholism leads to other progressive compulsive behaviors usually built around a mechanism that I call thrill. In other words, thrill becomes a way of managing feelings and gambling and excessive work and particularly sort of swashbuckling kinds of activities.

43:45 Sorry, did you say there is evidence or there's no evidence?

43:48 Drew No, there absolutely is. But you can also, and that's people with the gene, will continue to engage in those compulsions. They will get worse in spite of consequences. That is different than people who are obsessive compulsive and work compulsively like I do.

44:04 Adam Yeah, that's what you do, right?

44:05 Drew I'm not the addict, I'm the compulsive type. And there tends not to be progressivity with that, but it can still cause consequences.

44:12 Adam Yeah, meaning you won't keep going. You won't spin out.

44:16 Drew If I have a consequence, but I think of it with cigarettes to me are the greatest example of this, is that cigarettes make everyone compulsively preoccupied with tobacco, all humans. We will all get dependent on it and think about it and have trouble stopping it. But if you have a heart attack, you stop if you're not an addict. If you're an addict, you're still smoking through your tracheostomy, you're still smoking in the coronary care unit. When the consequences hit, you keep going.

44:39 Adam Nice. Okay. Good times. John?

44:43 Caller Yeah.

44:43 Adam You're 19.

44:44 Caller Yeah.

44:45 Adam What's up?

44:47 Caller I'm just like so excited that I'm actually talking to you guys. I've been listening to you guys forever. Like, I don't know how old I was since I started listening to the show, but thanks for allowing me on the air. You guys are seriously the best.

44:57 Adam Thanks for calling.

44:59 Caller All right. I have kind of a serious question. I've been sexually active for about two and a half years, and I have not once gotten off. Like, I have not finished or you basically ejaculated with somebody else.

45:17 Drew Do you masturbate and ejaculate?

45:19 Caller When I masturbate, I do.

45:21 Drew How long does it take? It depends.

45:24 Caller Like, the longest it's ever taken, I don't know, five minutes to ten minutes.

45:29 Drew The longest is five minutes, Adam. That's revealing.

45:31 Adam All right. Well, listen, throw out the long and throw out the short and we'll get the medium.

45:36 Drew Three minutes. A few minutes.

45:38 Adam A few minutes, right?

45:39 Caller A couple minutes, yeah.

45:41 Adam What position are you in when you masturbate?

45:44 Caller I've been sitting, I've been laying down. I think the most of the time though I'm like sitting down, like either in a chair or on the couch or whatever.

45:55 Adam Nice.

45:56 Drew Could you reproduce the position situation?

46:00 Adam Are you straight or gay?

46:02 Caller I'm gay, but I have had sex with girls before too. Sorry, I've gotten head from both guys and girls. I don't know, I've had anal sex, I've had vaginal sex, I've had oral sex and the best, I think, is just with my current boyfriend. I've been with him for about six months and I'm like, like there's feelings there and stuff and for a while, I thought that that was a huge issue. Maybe my emotions weren't into it as much, but now I've got a lot of emotion into it and I'm not scared or anything. It's just, I don't finish, it feels really good.

46:46 Adam All right, how about a BJ? That won't finish you off?

46:48 Caller No, it doesn't. Like, I mean, I could be sitting there for like five minutes or more and I don't even get off. I mean, it feels so good, but.

46:56 Adam All right, well, how about you finish yourself off and, you know, have them be in the room?

47:02 Drew You know, I mean, you have to move closer with time.

47:04 Adam It sounds ridiculous, but you essentially have to rehab your balls. Do you know what I'm saying, Drew?

47:11 Drew I'm listening.

47:12 Adam I mean, my grandmother says she's in a rehab thing now. She hurt her hip, you know, and it's like she has to walk, but they have to kind of help her slowly. People are now they stand around while she does it herself. Eventually, they'll not be there when she's doing it.

47:27 Drew This is the opposite of moving away from this, is sort of connecting with more slowly.

47:30 Adam Right. Let them give you a little handier, a little BJ, and then you finish yourself off. But your penis gets used to them being in the room kind of thing. And it's sort of like they're half responsible for it. And it just keeps going from there, right?

47:45 Drew Yeah.

47:46 Caller All right.

47:46 Adam We'll take a break.

47:47 Drew We'll be back.

47:48 Caller Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191, we'll be right back.

47:52 Caller Don't even think about touching that dial. Loveline will be right back on the new rock alternative.

47:58 Where's that voice guy at?

48:00 Caller On 94.7 NRK. Hey, Loveline it is.

48:37 Adam I'm Adam Corolla, that's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LLV-E-191. And it's back to the phones we go. We'll speak to Jake, he's 22, Jake.

48:48 Caller Hey, how's it going guys?

48:49 Adam Good.

48:49 Caller Adam, you and Jimmy are great, I love your show. I watch it all the time, you guys are like godsends.

48:54 Adam Thanks.

48:55 Caller Yeah, my question, I have a girlfriend, she's really pretty, we've been together for a while. She's got a banging body, but the problem that I have is she's got a hairy ass crack and I seriously like, almost like mine, Harry. And I wanted to know what a tactful way to talk to her about it would be. I mean, I don't really want to upset her or anything like that.

49:18 Adam Interesting point, because you hear a lot about the front area.

49:23 Drew Being groaned.

49:24 Adam Being groaned. But you forget about that the hedge that grows between the last vertebra and the end of the beginning of the vagina.

49:33 Drew My wife told me that when she got a bikini wax, they asked if that other area needs to be fixed as well.

49:41 Adam Yeah, there are certain women who will do that for other women, usually tiny Asian women who have just a little bit of Gestapo in them, you know.

49:53 Drew Lesbian Gestapo.

49:54 Adam Lesbian Gestapo. You hold still. You stop. Yeah, you bite on wood and spoon. Now hold still. You want manicure? You're quiet down. Let's go for you. You're a hubby going like this. Yeah, there are these, I hear about these women. I mean, it all, you know, that's that's what women put themselves through. And you're going to have to, I don't know, it's going to be a tough one to broach. Yeah, that's a little disturbing. How is she in other departments? I mean, hair, hair wise.

50:26 Caller Hair wise? Oh, she's pretty much just hair, arms, stuff. She shaves like in the front, you know? Right. But everything. I mean, she's not like, she's not like a like hairy all over her body or anything like that.

50:39 Adam Yeah. Well, you've been with her for how long?

50:42 Caller About six months.

50:43 Adam All right. Well, why don't you broach that subject in a playful way?

50:50 Caller That's what I mean.

50:51 Caller That's what I'm asking about. I mean, like, playful. Like, how do you mean playful?

50:55 Adam Well, first off, it may be the kind of thing that she doesn't even know about.

51:01 Drew Yeah, right.

51:01 Adam Well, she knows about it, but not really doesn't think about it.

51:05 Drew Right.

51:05 Caller Right.

51:06 Caller OK.

51:06 Adam And I'm sure she doesn't know. I'm sure she thought for a second that you had a problem with it. She would probably address it.

51:13 Caller So what?

51:13 Caller You're talking like tugging on a little bit.

51:15 Caller What? I'm bad.

51:16 Drew No. Yeah. No. Just bring it up.

51:20 Adam And when you bring it up, though, when you're being intimate.

51:23 Drew No, because that's going to everything will stop at that moment. Yeah. I think the bikini wax talk and.

51:32 Caller OK.

51:33 Drew And you do have your own hair. You need to manage, take care of my own hair.

51:37 Caller I manage my own hair.

51:38 Drew But I mean, can you get into the discussion by talking about your own problems?

51:41 Caller Yes, that's the way.

51:43 Drew Yeah.

51:44 Adam Yeah. Why don't you why don't you do a little shaved job on your own hedge and see if that doesn't she could do it now? Now turn the you want a girl to get up in that area?

51:54 No, no, no.

51:55 Adam What are you saying?

51:56 Drew I mean, any kind of body pruning and then he could turn the tables.

52:02 Adam I think a woman needs to wax down there. Am I right? Yeah. You can't really shave down there, can you? And is shaking her head? No. Now you got to get the wax.

52:11 Drew How often do you wax down there, Ann?

52:12 Adam And do you ever you get that that area waxed there?

52:16 Drew The frontal area, not the back.

52:18 Adam No, but you don't need the back.

52:20 Caller No, but there are plenty of women who do get the Playboy wax and that takes care of everything.

52:24 Drew Whoa, whoa, whoa.

52:25 Adam Yeah, the Playboy wax.

52:26 Drew So that's what he...

52:28 Adam She's got to get the Playboy wax.

52:29 And it just leaves that nice little strip in the front.

52:32 Adam Yeah.

52:32 Drew Oh my God.

52:33 Adam Yeah, you get that underside there.

52:35 Drew Oh my God.

52:36 Adam Yeah, that's a tough zone for a lot of the gals.

52:39 Drew Do you want somebody ripping your hair?

52:41 Adam There? No.

52:42 Drew Little bit, Adam. That would be like tearing off Santa Claus' beard.

52:46 Adam Yes, it would.

52:47 Drew Ripping it off.

52:48 Adam Listen, I would divulge any number of our nation's secrets if somebody held me in a room and threatened to tear that area off. Although I'm guessing it would be a little taller order on me than it would be on most gals. Or if not, I really pity the gal who has the same crack hair that I do. But you guys, she loves you. You love her. You just bring it up. Then that's it. It's six months. It's time to start getting into the nitty gritty of the relationship. You know what I'm saying?

53:17 Drew Yeah.

53:17 All right.

53:18 Drew The fart phase, we call that.

53:19 Adam Yes. Shanna?

53:21 Caller Yes.

53:21 Adam You're 18?

53:22 Caller Yeah.

53:23 Adam What's up?

53:24 Caller Well, my baby's father hasn't been around with me and I want to take full custody of the baby. But I'm not sure if a judge would give it to me.

53:33 Drew Why not?

53:34 Caller I don't know.

53:35 Caller Well, now, you know, the father has the right to.

53:39 Drew Yeah, but he's not around.

53:40 Caller Yeah, he comes with whatever, maybe twice a month, whenever he feels guilty.

53:47 Drew And what is it you want to preclude him from doing? Being around the child's life at all?

53:51 Caller Yeah, because he doesn't seem to care.

53:53 Caller He just says, oh, like, today he was supposed to come. And he'll say, I'm going to be here today.

53:58 Drew Why don't you appeal to the court?

54:01 Caller Because, I don't know, like, the people I've talked to and have kids, they say that the judge can grant, like, like, if I take him to court, then even if he doesn't pay child support, they'll give him the permission to take the baby over to his house.

54:16 Drew Why don't you take issue with that? That you don't trust him, you have a reason to believe it could be damaging.

54:20 Caller Well, his sister-in-law does. I know she does drugs.

54:22 Caller They smoke too much. But I mean...

54:25 Adam All right, hey, Shanna? What do you think we're going to do? Grant you sole custody over the phone?

54:30 Caller No, it's just like I was just wondering if there isn't a possible chance that they would give me custody.

54:37 Adam Yes.

54:37 Caller Full custody.

54:38 Adam Yes, there's a...

54:39 Drew Appeal to the court.

54:40 Adam There's a very good chance they would give you that.

54:42 Drew Appeal to the court, okay? Go through the necessary legal channels. Go for full custody. That's fine. Might go for like, what do they call it, when visitation has to be observed? If he wants to insist...

54:53 Caller That's the thing I just don't want to, and that I want to move out of state this year.

54:56 Drew Well, then talk to the courts about that. But clearly, you have reason to believe that the relationship with him...

55:02 Adam Well, why don't you talk to him first? Do you think he'll have a problem with it?

55:05 Caller I've given him many, many attempts. I told him at the hospital, well, before you sign the birth certificate, are you sure that you will want to be there?

55:13 Caller I told him we're not playing games anymore.

55:16 Adam I know, but why don't you tell him you and your child are planning on moving out of state? He might be relieved.

55:21 Drew He might block it, though.

55:22 Caller No, I already asked him for custody of the baby. He says no, that that's his baby, and he's not going to give it to me. It's plain and simple.

55:30 Adam All right.

55:31 Drew What is with people?

55:32 Adam And you guys can't have a sort of amiable relationship on behalf of the child? Do you know what I mean?

55:40 Caller I've honestly tried. I put aside the fact that he left me when I was seven months pregnant, and I walked in on him.

55:48 Drew But why walk in on him?

55:50 Caller Yeah.

55:51 Adam Doing what?

55:52 Caller On the shower.

55:54 Drew Doing what?

55:55 Caller With his other girlfriend.

55:57 Adam Well, go ahead and say that part. All right. So all stuff for the judge to hear.

56:04 Drew Yeah.

56:05 Caller But I thought they won't care for that.

56:08 Adam Listen to me, Goofball. You need to talk to an organization that gives free counsel with this kind of stuff. There's plenty of them out there. They call a little pro bono work.

56:19 Drew Legal Aid Society.

56:20 Adam That's right. They'll help you out, and then you go into court and you take care of this. Okay. Just say he's a junkie. Rachel. Yes. You're 23. What's up?

56:32 Caller Well, I have been in a relationship for four years now, two in which I've been engaged. For some reason, my fiance-

56:41 Drew Say that again. You've been in what? Four years?

56:44 Caller I've been in a relationship.

56:45 Adam For four years?

56:46 Caller For four years, two of which I've been engaged.

56:49 Adam I see. Two of those years you've been engaged.

56:51 Drew Oh, to the same person.

56:52 Caller Two years we've been engaged. Christmas Eve one year, the engagement thing, all really sweet and fine. But he doesn't want to get married. And he says the reason being, which I've even asked a few people myself, is when you get married, it seems like the relationship changes for the worse. For example, right now, the two of us, the relationship's great, we're like best friends. You know what I mean? But it seems like when people get married, that all kind of changes. And I mean, I've even asked some other people, or some even people just say, you know what I mean? Things do change when you get married.

57:28 Drew Rachel, that is nuts. You're buying his load of crap.

57:34 Adam How old is he?

57:36 Caller He's 29. Well, Tina, he's been married before, and it was a really, really bad relationship.

57:41 Drew Why? What was the problem?

57:42 Caller She's like, once they had a child together, she went kind of nuts, so to speak.

57:48 Drew No, I don't know what happened.

57:50 Caller She's like a total loser, you know what I mean? Once she had this child, she's a really bad mom, you know what I mean? And so now...

57:57 Adam How's, yeah, does he have custody of the child?

58:00 Caller He has joint custody.

58:02 Adam I see.

58:02 Caller And for some reason, in the city we live in, I mean, we've even taken it into court that, you know, this child has been, she's in second grade, she's been in like seven different schools, you know, lived with like six different guys. And I mean, it's just really hard to take a child away from the mother in the city we live in.

58:19 Drew In the country you live in, okay.

58:20 Caller No, I live in the city of Cincinnati.

58:22 Drew In the country you live, oh boy.

58:24 Caller Well, no, because I'm like, in the state of Ohio, it's not hard. It's just, for some reason here in Hamilton County, it's impossible to do. You know, I don't know why, but I mean, could that be why?

58:35 Adam How do you know it's easier in Ohio than it is in Hamilton County?

58:39 Caller How do I know?

58:40 Adam Yeah.

58:41 Caller Well, just because of, you know, I have friends, or you know what I mean, I-

58:45 Drew Rachel?

58:45 Caller Even the attorney, you know what I mean? Yeah.

58:47 Adam Okay. All right. So listen, he got in a crappy relationship. He's got a kid. He's got- he got himself into a bad situation.

58:56 Drew He's afraid it's going to happen again.

58:57 Adam And he's a little freaked out. All right?

58:59 Caller Okay.

59:00 Adam You're 23. You got a couple of years before you got to put the full court press on.

59:05 Caller Right. Well, I understand that, and I'm not in a hurry. Someday, you know what I mean, I do want to get married and, you know, probably to this person. Well, like, you know, Dr. Drew, you're married, right?

59:15 Drew Yeah.

59:15 Okay.

59:16 Caller Adam, you're not married, right?

59:18 Adam Right. Well, I'm married.

59:19 Caller I saw you last night on Jay Leno and I know he asked you, do you have a girlfriend?

59:22 Adam All right. Well, listen, I'm married.

59:24 Caller When you got married, Dr. Drew, did it seem different?

59:26 Drew Yes, things got better.

59:28 Adam That's right.

59:28 Caller Better how?

59:30 Adam She used to kick him in the nuts three times a week and it immediately went down to two.

59:34 Drew No, honestly, I always, men think this way, and I was no exception, that you sort of think in terms of, you know, you live your life as a single person and then you get married and then you die. And so I expected marriage to be some sort of terminal event and not to be all that wonderful. And it was immediately something that I found wonderful. And it's not been...

59:55 Adam Now he regrets it, but for the first six months. Hey, Rachel.

59:58 Caller Yeah.

59:59 Adam Listen, baby, what's up with you?

1:00:00 Caller What do you mean?

1:00:01 Adam Well, it's like you sit here and you say, I talked to some friends, they said that marriage wasn't IA. I saw you on Leno. Drew, what's it like for you? I mean, you're 23. You have feelings, right? I mean, why don't you trust your instincts?

1:00:16 Drew Right. You're way up in your head rationalizing everything.

1:00:19 Caller Yeah.

1:00:19 Adam Why don't you get out of your head a little bit?

1:00:22 Caller Well, it's not that. It's just that I guess maybe I kind of want to know for myself, is it, you know, once we get married, are we not going to be best friends anymore?

1:00:29 Adam No, listen, there's good marriages, there's bad marriages.

1:00:31 Caller Oh, sure. Okay.

1:00:32 Drew What do you think is magical about marriage that changes things for the worse? But what is that magical thing that happens? What would that be?

1:00:39 Adam This guy's a little freaked out. He had a bad relationship. You're 23, just cruise for a couple more years, and if he ain't coming around by then, then it's time to move on.

1:00:49 Drew I think engagements that go more than a year are suspect.

1:00:53 Adam Yes. But like I said, 23, relax. And a kid ain't going to fix it with him. So don't start going down that path. Christine?

1:01:05 Hi.

1:01:05 Adam Hey, you're 26. What's up?

1:01:07 Caller Yes, I am. Thanks for taking my call. I have a comment. I was sexually molested by my brother from the age of 5 to 12.

1:01:15 Adam Good time.

1:01:16 Caller Yeah, exactly. And when I was 15, I brought to my parents' attention and I was in therapy for three years and then I went off to school and started living my life. And about two years ago, things started coming up again and so I put myself back into therapy. And my comment, I know it was discussed earlier tonight, just for the listeners, if you have been sexually abused sometime in your life, it really does affect everything, every aspect of your life.

1:01:45 Drew Even though you think it doesn't, you've dealt with it. You've dealt with it. I've dealt with it. Oh, it's not an issue to me anymore, but it sort of permeates your brain chemistry.

1:01:52 Caller Yes. It's like the relationships that I pick with people, to I'm very compulsive, I'm a workaholic. Everything is just incredible.

1:02:04 Drew How has it gotten better with therapy?

1:02:06 Caller Well, just bringing, it's like I am very successful, but I've had a lot of chaos around me, and I never really understood why, and gosh, just therapy is just really, first of all, it's like I realize that's not my fault. It's okay for me to talk about, and it's something that has happened to a lot of people, and it's okay, and I'm a survivor, and as horrible as it was, I truly feel that in a way, you know, look how strong that I am because of it, and I truly feel that there isn't anything that I can't accomplish now because of what happened to me when I was younger.

1:02:44 Adam What's up with your brother now? Do you still have a relationship with him?

1:02:47 Caller You know, we went about four years where we did not speak, and it was really horrible because my parents are still together. They've been married for over 30 years, but they almost, you know, the family was literally torn apart, and it was just this big fiasco, but now he, no, we really don't talk. I mean, we do, but I don't. It's really hard.

1:03:09 Drew That's fine.

1:03:11 Caller My parents wanted to pretend like everything was okay, and that, you know, they'd have the holidays with me, and then they'd have separate holidays with him, and I mean, it was very, very, very hard on the family, and I mean, I came from a nice, strong middle class, upper middle class family, and that's not supposed to happen, but it does all the time.

1:03:29 Drew Sure. All right. So, a couple of things. Who sexually abused him?

1:03:34 Caller My mother's half-sister when he was younger, and our neighbor.

1:03:38 Drew Wow. So, a woman sexually abused him. Nice.

1:03:41 Caller I'm sorry, what?

1:03:42 Drew A woman sexually abused him?

1:03:43 Caller Yes.

1:03:44 Wow.

1:03:44 Caller And a man.

1:03:45 So, okay.

1:03:46 Drew So, that's why he sort of came into the family. And then secondly, let's give people a little hope for those who have, wait, wait, who have had sexual abuse. Is it not the case that through therapy now you have less chaos?

1:03:57 Caller Absolutely.

1:03:58 Drew That you attract better people?

1:04:00 Caller Absolutely.

1:04:00 Drew And that you have more gratifying relationships?

1:04:02 Caller Absolutely. But I have to tell you that it was really hard. The reason I put myself back in therapy was because I was attracting men that were emotionally unavailable. Actually they were gay. And I didn't know it until it was really hard for me because I couldn't figure out why I wasn't having successful relationships. And I was really depressed about it. And so that was my initial reason for going back to therapy. And then once I started therapy I realized, God, Christine, it's really because of what happened when you were younger. This is just a symptom of how you're really feeling inside.

1:04:33 Adam Great. All right. Well, you know, good times. I mean, you know, gay guys are usually too emotionally available. That's my problem with them. You know what I'm saying?

1:04:42 Drew Yeah.

1:04:43 Adam She said they were emotionally unavailable.

1:04:45 Drew Yeah.

1:04:45 Adam There's too much emotion with those gays. It's my big beef with the gays.

1:04:49 Drew You know, you've always said that.

1:04:50 Adam I've always said my problem with the gays is too much available emotion. I don't want to hear about it. All right. Well, Christine, God bless you.

1:05:00 Drew Enjoy.

1:05:00 Adam Keep going to that therapy, baby. Keep making your life work. It is not a death sentence, this molestation. Matt.

1:05:08 Hey, how's it going tonight?

1:05:09 Adam Hey, you're 19. What's going on there?

1:05:12 Caller Well, I have two questions actually. And I feel really bad because I know you guys get this a lot. I did make up my first question because I didn't think that you guys would actually take my two real questions.

1:05:21 Drew All right.

1:05:21 Caller What are they?

1:05:23 Caller The first one is more in towards Dr. Drew. If I occasionally smoke pot and I didn't know whether or not the THC like in the seeds actually would make me sterile.

1:05:34 Drew No, no, no. Just the marijuana will suppress your testosterone levels. Sure. Yeah, just pot well, but nothing about the seeds.

1:05:42 Adam All right. Next question.

1:05:44 Caller The second question is, I have a girlfriend and we have sex fairly often, like about two times a week, and I do masturbate and it seems as though sometimes I can only ejaculate if I'm in the same position that I was when I was masturbating.

1:06:00 Drew That's the Corolla syndrome.

1:06:02 Caller Excuse me.

1:06:02 Adam Thank you. Yeah, well, that's what happens. Your penis and your ass and your balls are used to a certain position.

1:06:09 Caller Is it just like if that's the way you're doing it, I mean, then is it going to carry over?

1:06:14 Adam It works that way for a lot of guys. Here's what you got to do. You got to move around. I now masturbate. I run in place when I masturbate. Oh, yes. I have that kind of range now.

1:06:25 Caller While driving, I mean.

1:06:27 Adam While driving, while skipping rope.

1:06:29 Caller Pogo-sticking, I mean.

1:06:31 Adam Yeah, that's right.

1:06:32 Caller Wow.

1:06:32 Adam That's it. All right. Listen, Sam, I am just masturbating in a plane, in a train, with a mouse and a house, with a fox and a box. Hold on, was Dr. Schuch really a genius? You know what I mean? You rhymed fox and box.

1:06:53 Drew Yeah. Yeah.

1:06:55 Adam You know, I've rambled on before about how most folks that publish children's books are basically retards who can't write normal books, but they still get a lot of credit for publishing a book, even if there's three words a page. Dr. Seuss is considered the sort of pinnacle of children's books and a genius.

1:07:17 Drew Yeah.

1:07:18 Adam Still read Green Eggs and Ham. Would you eat these green eggs in a plane? No. In a train? No. In a Fox?

1:07:26 Drew I would not, I could not. In a car?

1:07:28 Adam In a car.

1:07:28 Drew I would not, I could not.

1:07:29 Adam Right. Sniff a tar, in a box. I mean, you could almost vamp it as fast as he could.

1:07:35 Drew Some of it, some of his stuff is really super. I mean, I've had to read all of them to my kids.

1:07:41 Adam I was saying to Jimmy today, what happened to Horton Here's a Who?

1:07:46 Drew Horton Here's a Who, but Horton lays an egg.

1:07:48 Adam Oh, I didn't even know about that one.

1:07:50 Drew Oh, he sits on an egg in a tree.

1:07:51 Adam Yeah, but isn't that Horton Here's a Who? That's Horton Here's a Who. Horton lay an egg too?

1:07:57 Drew No, he keeps an egg. He hatches an egg.

1:08:00 Adam No, he heard a who.

1:08:02 Drew Yeah, that's the one I haven't seen. But I believe I've read, I think, just about every other doctor's who spoke to my kids. Fox in Socks, another genius.

1:08:11 Adam All right, don't you start making fun of him. Kelly?

1:08:15 Caller Yeah.

1:08:16 Adam You're 16, what's up?

1:08:17 Caller Yeah, okay, well, I'm pretty sure that my mom has a drinking problem. She pretty much is drunk like once or two times a week and she like drinks and drives a lot after work. Like she'll come home and I can totally smell it on her breath. I mean, she's not like drunk but you know, I can tell she's kind of she's been drinking, you know, and like I try to confront her about it, you know, but she gets really insecure and...

1:08:50 Drew Where's your dad?

1:08:52 Caller My parents are divorced.

1:08:54 Drew Can you talk to your dad about this?

1:08:56 Caller Um, I don't know. I don't really feel that comfortable talking to my dad.

1:09:01 Drew Well, you should though. This is something he could maybe help you out with. And if you're basically... You have two options basically. One is talk to dad, get his help, because you've already talked to mom. And the second is to go to Allateen and get some support and start working on yourself, because that's really all you can do in the long run. You can't change her.

1:09:18 Adam Is your dad involved with your life?

1:09:20 Caller Um, yeah. I see him about every other weekend.

1:09:23 Drew But Kelly, it would be really important for you to go to Allateen. You really would. And it turns out when people, important people in an alcoholic's life begin changing and getting support and pulling away, the alcoholic gets a little freaked out and that's awful and gets them to treatment.

1:09:39 Caller Yeah. She feels like we're all against her.

1:09:44 Drew Yeah. But that's her. And if you had a support network to go to when she got like that, a sponsor you could call, people you could turn to, a group you could go to, she wouldn't keep that crap up because you would have no part of it.

1:09:56 Caller All right.

1:09:57 Adam Allatein, Kelly. You got that?

1:10:00 Drew Allatein.

1:10:00 Adam Yeah. Like alcohol-tein.

1:10:03 Caller So I shouldn't try talking to her again, right?

1:10:05 Drew Yeah, sure. But you can't change her and you take care of yourself. I don't think it's going to go anywhere talking to her. You can certainly talk to your dad, but think about allatein, okay?

1:10:14 Caller Allatein.

1:10:15 Adam Yes. Allatein.

1:10:16 Caller Okay.

1:10:17 Adam All right, baby. Take care of yourself. All right. Thank you. I wish one of my parents was an alcoholic. I wish my dad hit the sauce.

1:10:24 Drew So you'd have some reason for?

1:10:25 Adam Something to talk about. My dad just sits there. I think my dad died in 1982. I really do. I think my dad's like the guy from Weekend at Bernie's. Really. He's just like a stuffed animal. He just sits there. Little booze every once in a while. I didn't get liquored up, get in a fight with him or get liquored up. Do one of those dad things where he gets you in the hand like, I tell you about women.

1:10:55 Caller They're evil.

1:10:56 Adam All of them. You know what I mean? It's one of those dad things. I think a little booze is nice for a dad. Mom's tough. Mom, that's rough. Nice. Because mom's got a little sketchy. My mom has a glass of red wine, makes a ass of herself every Thanksgiving. Half a glass of red wine. We will take ourselves a little break. When we come back, we will speak to Michael. He's 24, got a girl pregnant and he wants proof. And we're going to get to the bottom of this after this.

1:11:29 Caller Loveline will be right back.

1:11:31 Caller So get your problems ready.

1:11:33 Caller Don't you dare go away. Loveline will be right back with Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew right here on The New Rock Alternative.

1:11:40 Caller 94.7 NRK.

1:12:13 Adam Oh, man, that's Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1.

1:12:20 Drew Moving through some calls for a change tonight.

1:12:21 Adam There we go. We're going to keep going. We're talking to Phil. Phil is 26. Phil?

1:12:27 Caller How dare you?

1:12:28 Adam What's up there, Phil?

1:12:30 Caller How could you talk about Dr. Seuss like that?

1:12:32 Adam Oh, yeah. Anderson, Engineer Anderson just came in here. He was outraged to he wrote a thesis on Dr. Seuss. I can't believe it.

1:12:38 Caller Very disappointed in you.

1:12:40 Adam Listen, Luke Luck licks licks.

1:12:43 Drew Luke likes licks.

1:12:45 Adam I like Dr. Seuss. I do believe the guy was a talent. I'm just saying in a fox, you know, in a box with a box, you know what?

1:12:53 Drew But they probably get it. You know what bugs me the most about Dr. Seuss is the people that have tried to adapt his language since then. I think one of the one of these like kids stations had the wubbulous world of Dr. Seuss. He never made any weird nouns. Really. I mean, or it was always just weird use of words and interesting sort of creations, proper nouns.

1:13:16 Caller I think it's very creative for kids.

1:13:18 Adam Yes. Yes, it is. I'm just saying, I don't know.

1:13:21 Caller I think that's their vocabulary stern.

1:13:23 Adam I don't know how great a genius he was. I'd say a talented guy. I'll leave it at that. That's it, Phil? Well, yes.

1:13:33 Caller Actually, I wanted to know Dr. Drew, if you have any recommendations for little endurance in the bed, if you know what I'm saying.

1:13:45 Adam How to go longer with your masturbation? Yes. Drew, how does a man hold off longer?

1:13:52 Drew With himself?

1:13:53 Adam Or with an elf?

1:13:54 Drew With an elf?

1:13:56 Adam Little Dr. Seuss there, you idiot.

1:13:59 Drew I couldn't think of anything more.

1:14:00 Adam Oh, I see. On a shelf.

1:14:04 Drew He can get a girlfriend and kind of work it out. That's the deal.

1:14:08 Adam Yes. Get a girl and work it out. There you go. Dustin?

1:14:12 Yes.

1:14:13 Adam You're 26. What's up?

1:14:15 Caller Well, it's kind of a complicated problem.

1:14:18 Adam Well, hurry.

1:14:19 Caller Okay. First half of my life, I have a one-track mind. It's something people have commented on pretty much all my life. Maybe I only believed that it was so, but it had a bit of an effect. Now, the last couple of years. Hold on.

1:14:31 Adam The first half of your life.

1:14:34 Drew So until you were 13, you had a one-track mind.

1:14:37 Caller Yeah.

1:14:37 Drew You were obsessive compulsive. Is that what you mean?

1:14:39 Caller Well, that, you know, this is a problem until about.

1:14:43 Adam Well, hold on one second. Usually, you say you have a one-track mind, you then spit out what it is the track was on.

1:14:49 Caller Okay.

1:14:50 Adam What was it?

1:14:51 Caller See, that's the thing. It would only be one thing at a time. It would be very one, single-minded about.

1:14:56 Drew Well, give us an example.

1:14:58 Caller Okay. Let's say I wanted to accomplish something.

1:15:03 Drew Such as?

1:15:04 Caller Well, a project.

1:15:05 Drew Such as? He's going to hang up on you if you don't get more specific with us.

1:15:09 Caller I'm sorry. Okay. Let's say I had something that I wanted.

1:15:12 Drew Such as?

1:15:13 Adam See you. See you, Retardo.

1:15:15 Caller Yeah.

1:15:17 Adam I have a one-track mind. Give us an example of one of those things. Well, a project. No, be more specific. What type of project? Well, like something I was working on. I'm going to hang up on you. No, no, no. Like I was thinking about doing something that I wanted. That I wanted.

1:15:39 Caller All right.

1:15:40 Adam Dustin, hang on for just another half hour. Half hour. Okay. Gary.

1:15:48 Hello.

1:15:48 Adam You're 24. What's up?

1:15:50 Caller Hey, first of all, I want to say that I've been listening to you guys off and on since the Poor Man Day.

1:15:56 Caller Wow.

1:15:57 Drew How old are you?

1:15:58 Caller 24.

1:15:59 Adam Yeah. Jesus.

1:16:00 Been a while.

1:16:01 Caller Yeah, it's been a while. But anyway, I recently got married to someone that I was with friends first. And she comes from a traditional family. I do. We didn't have sexual relations before we got married. And now we're married and I'm having trouble having sexual relations with her. And the primary reason is because, I mean, I kind of, I can't see it. I mean, for some reason, I need to see them in like a dirty way. And I can't see her as like in a sweaty way. And I mean, I just don't get sexually aroused.

1:16:39 Drew How come you didn't know this before you got married?

1:16:42 Caller Because, I mean, I never felt this way about anybody.

1:16:47 Drew I mean, this is another no answer. How come you didn't feel like you didn't notice that you weren't having sexual feelings toward her?

1:16:54 Adam He doesn't know. They didn't have sex.

1:16:56 Drew Yeah, but he has no sexual feeling towards her. Wouldn't you have known?

1:17:00 Caller I do. But I mean, I'm sexually attracted to her. But I mean, I just I feel really bad. I have to think of...

1:17:10 Adam Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know. Listen, I feel your pain, brother. I know what you're talking about. You can't have an intimate thing. You have to have like an animal thing.

1:17:21 Caller Yeah, like a dirty animal, raw and dirty thing.

1:17:24 Drew But is that just because she won't cooperate, won't go down that road?

1:17:26 Caller No, she would. She would. But it's hard for me because I love the way I love her. I mean, it's really hard for me to think of her. And I was friends with her for about four years. And she comes from... I knew the way she was and that she hadn't been with anyone. So I always kept myself from thinking of her in that way when we were just friends.

1:17:49 Drew Something missing here.

1:17:50 Adam Yeah, all right. How do you get along with your mom?

1:17:54 Caller Pretty good.

1:17:55 Adam Yeah, you love her?

1:17:57 Caller Yeah.

1:17:57 Adam Is she good to you, good woman?

1:18:00 Caller Yeah, a very good woman.

1:18:02 Adam All right. And are you saying that you want, would you like your girlfriend to put on some stiletto heels and a leather teddy?

1:18:15 Caller I don't know. I don't know if that would work.

1:18:17 Drew No, he can't go there with her.

1:18:18 Adam I mean, is that what you want from her or do you have to?

1:18:22 Caller I don't want that. I mean, I want to be able to do that without having her to put that kind of stuff on.

1:18:28 Adam I know, but like when you have sex with her, do you have to like picture her being raped or do you have to pull her hair or something like that?

1:18:37 Caller I have to think of her like, no, I don't, but that's why it's been really hard for me to really go at it with her.

1:18:45 Drew Can you perform sexually with her?

1:18:47 Caller Yeah, I can, but it's not very often. I don't get to urge to very often.

1:18:54 Adam All right, but listen.

1:18:56 Drew There's something missing here.

1:18:57 Adam Gary, we're not getting anywhere. Now listen to me.

1:19:02 Caller Okay.

1:19:02 Adam I'm just trying to get some clarity here.

1:19:04 Caller Okay.

1:19:05 Adam When you have sex with her, do you have to put her in sort of demeaning situations in your mind?

1:19:12 Drew Or would you like to but can't?

1:19:16 Caller I would like to sometimes. The thing is that for me to do it often, yes, I would have to do that.

1:19:24 Adam Right. Okay. All right. Hold on. I can't, I feel like, I don't know, I'm just going to kill myself.

1:19:35 Drew Why? Why? Why?

1:19:35 Adam I don't know. Because it was like our last two calls. I couldn't get anything out of them. I'm not exactly sure what he's saying.

1:19:43 Drew I think there's a lot more here than we're going to get at with Gary. A lot. A lot. Think about that. Just think about how much it would take to get in. First of all, he has this very strange, idealized notion of her. I kept her protected. I wouldn't think of her that way, that awful way, that sexual way. All kinds of weird feelings about his sexuality, all kinds of idealized feelings about her. Then I let that in, but then we still didn't have sex because I know how she is, I protect her. Then I marry this person? What a leap is that? And then, oh, surprise, I have no sexual feelings toward her. It's just a mess. A mess. They need couples therapy, seriously.

1:20:19 Adam Okay. And listen, everybody, here's the new rule that I'll forget about in the next 10 minutes on this show, which is if you call in and you say, I have a wife, I love her very much, but I do have fantasies about putting her into meaning situations or I have rape fantasies or such and such and so on. And you basically explained to us that you need to humiliate or whatever. And then two minutes later, I regurgitate it back to you just so I can make sure we're on the same page, which is so you can't get it up unless you're thinking about your wife being raped. Don't get defensive and go, no, no, no, it's not that because now we're nowhere.

1:20:58 Drew No, but you missed what he said. What he said was...

1:21:00 Adam But we get that a lot, what I just did. And now we're back to zero.

1:21:04 Drew But his thing was he needs to do that to women, but he can't do that to her. He can't go there with that fantasy with her. He's too idealized, she's too pure. He can't have the one he wants to have with her, that he needs to have in order to function sexually with a woman.

1:21:19 Adam Yeah, well that wasn't too far off.

1:21:21 Drew No, that's what he was trying to... That's why he was sort of pushing back a little bit. No, it's not that. I can't have that fantasy.

1:21:27 Adam Okay, well, whatever it is, you two get into some counseling.

1:21:31 Drew Yep.

1:21:31 Adam There you go.

1:21:32 Drew Because can you imagine living like that? How long would that marriage last?

1:21:35 Adam Oh, I don't know. I think I could string it along for 20 years. Michael?

1:21:40 Oh, yes.

1:21:41 Adam Yes, you're 24. What's up?

1:21:44 Caller Six years ago, I had an unprotected sexual encounter with a girlfriend of mine. And three days later, she called me and said she was pregnant. Now, you know, I talked to a nurse.

1:21:56 Drew Not possible. It's not possible.

1:21:59 Caller Yeah. I talked to a nurse of her own and she said exactly that. Now, I, regardless of that, I gave her the benefit of the doubt and told her, you know, give me a call in nine months and we'll have a paternity test. She was very upset and I haven't spoken with her since. Now, I'm in a serious relationship. I'm thinking of getting married. And I don't, you know, want this hanging over my life.

1:22:23 Drew So, what do you want to do?

1:22:24 Caller Show back up.

1:22:25 Drew What are you going to do?

1:22:26 Caller Well, I've been thinking of trying to call her, but my only route is her family.

1:22:31 Drew No, listen, you called her bluff.

1:22:33 Adam Six years ago?

1:22:34 Drew You called her bluff. She ran out. You know it's not your child because it was three days later. What's the deal?

1:22:40 Adam Listen, you went heard from her in the past six years.

1:22:45 Caller Yeah, that's what I keep telling myself.

1:22:46 Adam Yes.

1:22:47 Caller Just wait.

1:22:47 Adam Let's forget about what you tell yourself. I'm telling yourself that. Don't worry about it. It's done.

1:22:53 Drew Yeah.

1:22:54 Adam Now, worry.

1:22:54 Drew It wasn't in the first place.

1:22:56 Adam Okay, but here's something to think about. You're thinking about getting married and you're thinking about reasons why it ain't going to work.

1:23:07 Drew The marriage.

1:23:08 Adam You know what I'm saying?

1:23:09 Drew The burdens. The burdens.

1:23:10 Adam A lot of people think of this as responsible, but it's a little neurotic. It's six years ago. And by the way, that's six years from 18 to 24. Mine will be 106 years.

1:23:21 Drew It feels not just a little bit like what the burden is going to be, but like reasons not to get married is what it feels like.

1:23:27 Adam Hey, genius.

1:23:28 Drew I said that like you said, you said I think you said it was a burden.

1:23:31 Adam You were looking for no, you got off on that tangent. You know what you do, Drew? Let me tell the genius of Drew. I hear what I want to take my idea.

1:23:40 Drew Make it mine.

1:23:41 Adam You spin it off another direction for a second. Then you come back to my ideas. But you claim this one as your own.

1:23:47 Drew This one is mine.

1:23:48 Adam No, it is not. How dare you take my idea? Yeah, he's getting close to marriage and he's got to start looking around for reasons that it might not work out.

1:23:59 Drew Right.

1:23:59 Adam Think about that, Michael. Don't contact this girl. We'll be back.

1:24:03 Caller Hello. This is your radio. Loveline will be right back.

1:24:08 Caller Tonight, Loveline is brought to you by Car Toys on 947NRK, The New Rock Alternative. I'm so glad you're here.

1:24:41 Adam Hey, yeah! Love Lion, I'm Adam, that's Drew. And this is you with the phone calls. Louie, you're 18.

1:24:50 Caller Hello.

1:24:50 Adam What's up, Louie?

1:24:52 Caller I was basically abused by my two other brothers and by my cousin.

1:24:58 Adam Yeah. What'd they do to you?

1:25:06 Caller They never entered me, but they like, they would lay me down on, like on a counter. And they'd like, you know, between the counter and my, my back body, they would like, sexually abuse me.

1:25:22 Drew Okay. Maybe you told anybody about this?

1:25:24 Caller No.

1:25:25 Drew How about your parents? Would they listen to this? Okay, so they're aware of this, right?

1:25:36 Caller They only know about one incident.

1:25:38 Drew They what?

1:25:39 Caller They only know about one incident.

1:25:42 Drew Why don't you tell them there's some more, and maybe you can get some help for this.

1:25:46 Adam What are you doing now, Loey? I don't mean right this second, but in general. You going to high school?

1:25:51 Caller No.

1:25:52 Adam You working?

1:25:54 Caller Yes.

1:25:55 Adam How's your job?

1:26:03 Drew Stealing food.

1:26:04 Adam Yeah.

1:26:06 Caller Hmm.

1:26:07 Adam And are they going to fire you?

1:26:09 Caller No. Well, they brought me up for it, but I don't know. No.

1:26:15 Adam I see. So you never got any counseling, you never talked to anybody about this?

1:26:21 Drew I got counseling for it, but my parents would go with me, and they'd be the only ones talking.

1:26:27 Caller I never got a say in it.

1:26:30 Drew Why don't you call the same counselor and go by yourself, since they have some familiarity with your situation. Well, no.

1:26:36 Adam That's going to be a long time ago.

1:26:39 Caller I don't have insurance no more. I barely work and I barely have a couple of... I went to weed.

1:26:47 Adam Yeah.

1:26:49 Caller I was addicted to crack, but I started having smoke for two weeks.

1:26:55 Adam So, hey, Louie.

1:26:56 Drew Two weeks. Two weeks of crack.

1:26:57 Adam Well, better in two days. Louie, so you're living at home.

1:27:04 Caller Yeah.

1:27:04 Adam Who lives with you?

1:27:07 Caller My dad, my mom, my two younger brothers.

1:27:11 Adam I see. Are you getting in any trouble?

1:27:16 Caller Not lately.

1:27:18 Adam Okay. What about your older brothers? They moved out?

1:27:23 Caller One of them lives in Blackhouse.

1:27:30 Adam Uh-huh. Right. Do you have friends, Lowy?

1:27:38 Caller No.

1:27:39 Adam You don't really have any?

1:27:41 Caller The only people that I talk to, they're all smoke weed, and that's the only reason we talk to each other. You know, either I have a hookup, or they have a hookup. That's it. We don't talk. I don't even see them. I stay in my room 24-7.

1:27:57 Drew You sound like someone, though, that would be certainly capable of friendships. Have you reached out a little bit?

1:28:05 Adam Hey, Louie?

1:28:06 Caller Yes.

1:28:06 Adam You know, you need, besides a little counseling, I mean, all right, let me just tell you something, Louie. You're in a bad position right now in your life. You really are.

1:28:17 Drew It's an awful time, too.

1:28:18 Adam It's a bad time. Listen, I was in your position. I mean, I wasn't molested, but I didn't know what I was going to do. I had crappy jobs. My parents didn't give a rat's ass. You know, you have to start asserting yourself in making your own life. You need to find friends. You need to find something that turns you on. I mean, you need to...

1:28:39 Caller I have a girlfriend.

1:28:40 Drew Good.

1:28:40 Caller I had a girlfriend.

1:28:41 Adam Yeah, but I don't even mean turns you on as far as sexually. I just mean something you like to do.

1:28:47 Drew A passion.

1:28:48 Adam Yeah. I don't care if it's shooting hoop or origami. You got to find the S-word.

1:28:54 Caller My bad. I... I'm...

1:28:55 Drew Hold on. Hold on.

1:28:57 Adam All right. Louis, but listen, you have to... A, don't steal food from work. Yeah.

1:29:07 Caller You know what? It's thanks for yourself. You know, my mom doesn't cook. She cooked today. She actually cooked some freaking good food today.

1:29:14 Adam Yeah, but listen.

1:29:15 Caller She hasn't cooked and she was gone to Mexico for a week, for a month.

1:29:20 Adam Louis, listen. Listen to what I'm telling you. Your parents are idiots. Your brothers are idiots. It's a bad situation that you got born into. You know that, right?

1:29:33 Caller You know what?

1:29:34 Adam What?

1:29:36 Caller I was abused and I abused too.

1:29:39 Drew Yeah. I felt that. Did you abuse your little brothers?

1:29:44 Caller No.

1:29:45 Drew Okay.

1:29:45 Adam I did abuse my two little brothers, but I also abused my nephew a month ago.

1:29:51 Drew That's what happens. I just can feel that guilt coming from them.

1:29:55 Adam Louis, listen. Don't blame yourself. Get yourself some help. Get yourself some therapy. Work hard. Get a job that you like. Get involved with something. You need to get a job. You need to get a job like a apprentice carpenter or mason or something like that. Is my mic on? And get involved.

1:30:19 Drew Here's an abuse hotline too. It's Child Abuse Hotline 1-800-540-4000. 1-800, easy number, 540-4000.

1:30:31 Adam All right. Oh, boy. Thank God there's 10 brothers. Jesus Christ. Everyone's just goosing everyone. Every nephew. All right, all right, all right. Nina.

1:30:43 Yeah.

1:30:43 Adam You're 19.

1:30:44 Caller I'm 19. And I had a problem.

1:30:48 Caller Yeah.

1:30:50 Caller My boyfriend, he's 30 and I'm 19. And we've been together for about just over five years.

1:30:56 Drew Well, well, well. So he was 25 and you were 14. Yeah. Doesn't bother you now that you're 19. Think about that 25.

1:31:04 Caller No, it bothers me.

1:31:06 Drew Yeah.

1:31:06 Caller Back then, it like went right over my head. I mean, I could have cared less. But no.

1:31:10 Drew Well, you were flattered. You were flattered. You didn't know you were dealing with a guy that was severely disturbed, flawed.

1:31:15 Caller No, I was just madly in love with this older, cool guy.

1:31:18 Adam He sounds like a dynamite individual. I'd like to get to know him better.

1:31:21 Drew Yeah. How could you pass up that?

1:31:22 Caller Yeah.

1:31:23 Adam So now what?

1:31:25 Caller Now, when we have sex, I think he wants me to be a little girl. But when I tell him that he likes little girls, I mean like little girls, like 12, you know?

1:31:40 Drew Like how old you were when he first started dating you?

1:31:42 Caller Yeah. When I confront him with that, he's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, of course not. You know, I like you. You're what I like. But when we're actually sleeping together, I don't want to be real graphic or anything, but he wants me to do like little girl things.

1:31:55 Drew Like what?

1:31:56 Caller Like, you know, oh, daddy, and daddy put it there, daddy do that. And it's just kind of, at first, I was kind of into it just because he was into it.

1:32:05 Adam Yeah. Hey, Nina.

1:32:06 Caller Yeah.

1:32:06 Drew Don't have kids with this guy.

1:32:08 Adam How shocking is it that this guy turns out to be a piece of work?

1:32:11 Caller Well, you know what I'm saying? He did some time in jail. And he's definitely a piece of work. I won't deny that for a second. He's certainly an asshole, but sorry, I'm sorry.

1:32:21 Adam All right. So what's up with you?

1:32:25 Drew Laughing at you.

1:32:26 Caller You have to ask that, huh?

1:32:27 Drew You're gaily telling us, oh, he's an asshole. Of course he's an asshole.

1:32:30 Adam What's your dad do to you?

1:32:32 Caller My dad's great. He's a great dad.

1:32:34 Adam No, he's not. It's horrible.

1:32:37 Drew He's good now. What was he like when you were four?

1:32:40 Caller He wasn't there. He had his job. He's a pharmaceutical manager. And it keeps him out of town three to four days out of the week. He wasn't really over there. But, you know, it's not like he was off to another woman.

1:32:54 Drew All right. OK.

1:32:55 Adam Listen, listen. This this boyfriend of yours, this guy's a real piece of ass.

1:33:01 Caller I know.

1:33:02 Adam Well, once you get out of this relationship, you're an adult now. He's still a freaked out kid.

1:33:08 Drew He's a pedophile.

1:33:09 Adam He's a pedophile.

1:33:10 Caller Would you consider that a pedophile?

1:33:11 Adam Yes. That's 25 when you were 14. I should I should be. I was going to say he should be arrested, but he's already been arrested. What was he in jail for?

1:33:21 Drew Parole violation.

1:33:22 Caller I would wide variety of things. He was never in jail for drugs, which is surprising, but hitting a cop car with his truck.

1:33:28 Drew Well drawn.

1:33:29 Caller What?

1:33:30 Drew Yeah. Nothing.

1:33:31 Caller No, not drinking. Just doing that on purpose. Yeah. Okay.

1:33:34 Adam The guy needs a bullet in his head. Do you hear me? Listen, I really mean it.

1:33:40 Caller He loves me.

1:33:41 Adam He loves me. He loves pizza too.

1:33:44 Caller Who cares?

1:33:46 Adam You idiot. He loves you like a little girl, like a ragdoll. Come on, everybody. Jesus Christ. You see what you do, dad, to your girls, all you crappy dads out there? You see what you do to them? You ruin them. You rattle, you scramble their brain like an egg. They don't know anything. They're 14. They date 25-year-olds and they think, oh, but he loves me. Yeah, he rams cop cars. He does a little time. He wants me to lick an oversized sucker and put my hair in pigtails. He loves me. You see, Dad? Good. You see what you get, Dad? Now, real funny now, isn't it? Hope you had a good time on all those trips. All that neglect, all that abuse. Yeah, now you gotta screwed up girls with a felon. Enjoy. Have them little felon grandkids run around the house stealing stuff. Fantastic. You really did a great job. You should applaud yourselves, you screwball dads. All right, wanna take a little break?

1:34:43 Drew Yeah, all right, we'll be back.

1:34:55 Caller Yeah, you're listening to Loveline, right here on Portland's New Rock Alternative. It's night at 4, 7, N-R-K.

1:35:02 Caller Who are these two people? What makes them tick?

1:35:21 Adam Well, there you go. Another fantabulous episode of Love Line in the Can, another fantabulous week of Love Line in the Can. I want to thank Lauren for doing a great job on the phones, at least half the week, Sarah, for doing a great job on the phones. I want to thank Producer Ann for putting her feminine stank all over the show. I want to thank the ever-changing Head.

1:35:44 Drew Here. That would be here.

1:35:46 Adam And Head, too, because emotionally the guy, he's all over the map. Anderson for doing a great job.

1:35:51 Drew Well, he loves that Dr. Seuss.

1:35:52 Adam Engineer Anderson Routh, he's just a Dr. Seuss. Well, you peel him, he's like an onion, and he just keeps going, that guy. So until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:36:04 Caller This has been Love Line. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, but the management sponsors for the station. The producer for Love Line is Ann Wilkins Engel. Love Line is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Thursday, February 22, 2001