Episode 1000754887052

0:58 Voiceover Sexually-oriented content, content. Listener discretion is advised. Loveline, coast to coast.

1:14 Adam It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-4-4-4-5-5. Dr. Drew supports certified physician and addiction medicine specialist.

1:27 Drew What in the hell are you laughing at?

1:28 Adam You know what I like about this show? After the show begins is when you and I start looking for stuff. Like, hey, I need a pen. Where's the pen?

1:36 Drew Where's the microphone thing?

1:37 Adam Yeah, you like to get up and move around and look around for stuff, but it's only after the show begins.

1:42 Drew Well, why waste time before?

1:45 Adam Yeah, why don't we punch in before we do any work? Dr. Drew Bort survived?

1:50 Drew Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:51 I did all that?

1:52 Drew Yeah, yeah.

1:52 Adam All right. Esai Morales is our guest tonight. He's from NYPD Blue. Tuesday nights, ABC, 10 o'clock. Just joined the cast this year, and that's a pretty good show to join.

2:05 Esai Morales Yeah. How are you doing?

2:07 Adam I'm doing good. We have not seen you since the TV show, which is probably, was it two seasons ago?

2:14 Esai Morales About two.

2:15 Adam About two seasons ago. You know the thing about what I normally call Mexican guys, but I'll call them Latino guys?

2:22 Esai Morales I'm not Mexican, but I play one.

2:24 Adam They don't change, or whatever you are. What are you?

2:27 Esai Morales I am American, first and foremost.

2:30 Adam Oh, yeah, that's what I like. Good.

2:31 Esai Morales I mean, come on, you know, if I get, you know. What's your heritage, though? We have to fight on the American side.

2:36 Adam That's what I like. That's what I like.

2:38 Esai Morales That's right. My heritage is Puerto Rican, Spanish, French in there. But I'm an honorary Chicano, so.

2:46 Adam But good. You got a good aging thing going for you because I mean, you look about the same as you did in La Bamba four years ago or 17 years ago.

2:56 Esai Morales Yeah, well, actually 87. So 13. Yeah, 13 years ago.

3:00 Adam Or 14.

3:01 Esai Morales 14.

3:01 Adam Jesus. Jesus. Meanwhile, Lou Diamond looks like a raisin.

3:05 Esai Morales I cannot believe.

3:11 Adam So NYPD Blue, Tuesday Nights, I got my first real episode.

3:16 Esai Morales I mean, I was introduced last week. They kept me till the end. Now, tomorrow night, I really run things.

3:22 Adam How does that work? Do they contact you? Do you go in and audition just like anybody?

3:26 Esai Morales Audition like anybody else?

3:28 Drew People need to audition.

3:31 Adam But are you auditioning against other guys who you recognize? I mean, you're not just in with a bunch of actors. I mean, it's not like that.

3:38 Esai Morales Oh, God forbid. No, no. I walked in there and I saw people who I could name who have names, but I don't want to name them because then it's like...

3:45 Adam Yeah, then you beat them out.

3:47 Esai Morales They're very good actors. A lot of Italian guys, a lot of Chicano guys.

3:53 Adam I don't know enough to even know how this works, but it seems to me like there's two kinds of auditions. There's open call auditions and then there's...

4:01 Esai Morales Which I don't remember.

4:03 Adam Right, good. And then there, the audition, like you have to read for a role, but it's between you and a few other guys we've heard of.

4:10 Right.

4:11 Adam And somehow they got hold of you.

4:13 Right.

4:14 Adam It's not like you saw an ad in the drama log.

4:17 Drew Adam, what are you trying to do? Build a case here for why you shouldn't have to do auditions?

4:19 Adam Yeah, that wasn't really an audition. That's what I'm saying.

4:21 Esai Morales I don't want it. I don't like having to do auditions. I know I could play the part in my sleep if I have to, but I guess they don't know that. They also want to see how prepared, how bad you want to be. I guess you'll take whatever poop they give you on the day.

4:34 Adam I just give them oral and it'll save the reading, save my dignity.

4:38 Esai Morales Use your head. That's right.

4:39 Adam All right. We'll take some calls.

4:41 Drew That's Adam's motto.

4:43 Adam Take some calls. Sam?

4:44 Drew And his new book, too, coincidentally.

4:46 Adam What's that? No, shut up. Sam, you're 17.

4:48 Caller Yeah.

4:50 I got a problem, I guess. My parents, they keep on talking about sex around me. It's kind of disturbing.

4:59 Drew What do you mean? Give me an example of what they did.

5:01 I was in the kitchen and they were watching that stupid show on Showtime, Queer as Folk. And they were in one of those-

5:09 Adam Queer as Folk, right?

5:10 Yeah, they were in one of those adult shops, right?

5:12 Yeah.

5:14 There was a mirror on my wall and I saw the reflection after my mom made this comment. I want to go in one of those stores and the guy was holding a sex toy, right? Yeah.

5:27 Adam Hey, Drew, let's not start with young guys. No, it's okay. Go ahead, Sam. You're doing good, bud.

5:33 Esai Morales Talk to us.

5:34 Adam It's kind of nervous. I understand. So you're a sex toy, like a vibrator or something?

5:39 Drew Yeah.

5:40 Esai Morales Or a dilly?

5:41 Drew Yeah. So it bothered you that she said that in front of you, is that right?

5:44 Yeah. When we were younger, me and my brother, we were looking for Christmas presents.

5:48 Adam Oh, I did that too.

5:50 We stumbled across something.

5:53 Adam Yeah. Listen, parents-

5:54 Drew What did you fumble into?

5:56 Adam I swear to God, I don't know if my mom may listen to the show, but I think I found a-

6:00 Esai Morales A live grenade.

6:02 Adam I wish it was a grenade. I think I found a vibrator in there when I said, yeah, I swear to Christ, about nine or ten or something.

6:08 Esai Morales You stole the batteries. What do you think you did?

6:09 Adam Still up my ass. What do you think? What do you mean what I did? I threw it back.

6:13 Esai Morales You threw it back?

6:14 Adam Listen, all I'm saying, this is a very good point, which is parents, kids search desperately for Christmas toys somewhere in the couple of weeks before Christmas, when you guys leave the house. I mean, we all did it. Did you ever do that, Drew? Are you kidding me? You were so whipped by your parents that you didn't even look for Christmas presents?

6:37 Esai Morales He's a good kid.

6:38 Drew Look at him. He became a doctor. We had Hanukkah at my birth.

6:41 Adam Oh, that sucks. That's why you're angry. You said you'd do that?

6:46 Esai Morales At times I peek, but I want to get to this young man's situation.

6:50 Adam What the hell is going on? You didn't look for presents?

6:54 Esai Morales No. No, no.

6:55 Christmas to me was weird.

6:56 Adam Okay. The point is, is somebody... What's one of the chances? I get in two guys who don't have presents.

7:00 Esai Morales I still found things.

7:01 Adam Okay. Yeah. You're going to find stuff in there.

7:04 Esai Morales It's their life. You have to realize, how did you get here?

7:08 Adam Sam?

7:09 Caller Yeah.

7:09 Drew So, do you have a younger brother?

7:11 Caller Yeah.

7:11 Drew Younger brother. Do they talk about explicit things in front of you?

7:15 Well, like my mom, she'd be at the dinner table, and she's like, you guys, do you want to want anything else? I'm like, dad's like, you know, maybe later.

7:25 Adam Yeah, okay. That makes a lot of weird sex jokes.

7:27 Yeah, but it's, I think it's their right.

7:30 Drew You know what, though, but it bothers Sam, and it's a little disrespectful. I don't think they would do it if they knew how you felt. How about just sort of putting them on notice? Like, you can do it in a lighthearted way, just go, I don't want to hear about this. You know, just put your finger in your ear and start saying the alphabet or something.

7:44 Esai Morales But I always wonder, why is it kids have a real, like, this tastes like a disgusting, like, gross thought of their parents being sexual with each other?

7:53 Adam I don't know, but it's healthy. I'm down with it. I think it's healthy. But I agree.

7:58 Drew No, no, he means it's healthy to be disgusting.

7:59 Adam No, I think it's healthy that we're disgusted at it. Well, if you see my parents, you'd be disgusted too. But there's some good-looking parents out there.

8:06 Drew But there is something about being, you're not a parent, right?

8:09 Esai Morales No, but I've thought about parenting since I was thirteen years old.

8:11 Drew There's something about being a parent that makes you not want your kids to have sex, and there's something about being a kid that makes you not want your parents to have sex.

8:18 Esai Morales Yeah, but I think it's a mutual hypocrisy. I think it's our society's hang up on sex.

8:23 Drew No, no, no.

8:24 Adam But maybe.

8:25 Esai Morales In South America, there are cultures where they all have one hut, and everybody does everything in the hut, and kids don't look at sex the same way.

8:31 Adam But let me ask you this. Maybe it's in place. And I agree. Maybe it's in place that we stay away from sexuality with our kids, so there's no molestation or anything like that.

8:46 Esai Morales But I think that it's the unhealthy attitudes towards sex in general that makes those things kind of, you know.

8:54 Adam Fester.

8:55 Esai Morales Yeah, and exciting to people.

8:57 Adam Yeah. No, I'm with you. But I'm wondering if, like, it's almost an innate thing. It's almost like a biological event that when you hear about your parents having sex or something, when you're 14, it's like, ooh, and they don't want to hear about you having sex. Maybe it's positive somehow.

9:17 Drew But let's think about the natural selection, the biological imperatives. It would be a genetic advantage for there to be repulsion against interbreeding genetically.

9:29 Esai Morales I mean, I guess, no, I agree with that.

9:31 Drew And so that's where some of those taboos come from is to protect us against genetic mixing.

9:35 Adam Think about the opposite.

9:37 Esai Morales Inbreeding, yeah. But what I'm trying to say is that, like in Sweden per se, I got a card from Sweden, some family, they were all naked. The family, the entire family from adults to 14 to 12. And there isn't that kind of stigma. This is, yeah, this is dirty. This is wrong. This is nasty. This is hidden. So I just think that I think the advice I would give to this young man is split the difference. I agree with Dr. Drew that you should maybe tell your parents, you know, it makes me uncomfortable. I mean, you're the ones telling me this is nothing I should do too soon in life. So why are you guys being so open? But at the same time, I would urge the young man to realize, haven't you ever gone out with a girl and she thinks, you know, boys are disgusting? You know, it's something you grow out of at a certain point. And the concept of disgust with your parents, at some point, I wish my parents were still talking, you know, we're still into each other. And in a sense of the...

10:30 Adam Not me, but yeah.

10:31 Esai Morales No, but the point is, you know, let's get over it a little bit, try not to let it bother you so much.

10:36 Adam I agree. He's 17. He can work it out. Christy?

10:40 Yeah?

10:40 Adam You're 20?

10:41 Caller Yeah.

10:41 Adam What's up?

10:42 Caller About five and a half months ago, I started a relationship with my boyfriend. And about three weeks after we started having sex, I went to the doctors for a normal exam and I had a yeast infection. So I took the medicine, whatever they gave me.

10:55 Drew And what did they give you?

10:58 Caller I think it was the...

10:59 Esai Morales Lhotremin?

11:00 Caller No, it was the tri-terazol.

11:02 Drew Terazol, all right. So the three day?

11:04 Caller Yeah, it was a pill and then a seven day.

11:07 Drew They gave you Diflucan?

11:08 Caller They gave me Diflucan as well and they gave me the cream to put in at night. About a week later I found out I was pregnant.

11:15 Oh.

11:16 Caller I had an abortion.

11:17 Drew Because of the pill? The medicine exposure? Because you wanted to have an abortion?

11:20 Caller Well, yeah, I wasn't ready. And I just started this relationship and I don't want kids for another ten years.

11:27 Drew No birth control?

11:28 Caller I was on birth control but I was a week late. So, I mean, I haven't had any relationships for the past like six months. And so, I skipped a week to change my period ahead on a trip. Yeah. And then it happened all of a sudden.

11:42 Drew In the future, just take your pill straight across and don't take the sugar pill week.

11:46 Caller Yeah, I learned that now.

11:48 Esai Morales And one other thing, even if you're taking the pill, I would practice multiple, especially being so fertile, which you sound like, maybe even abstain from having him finish.

12:00 Caller Yeah.

12:01 Esai Morales Inside, I mean.

12:02 Drew Tell him you say, you say, send that message.

12:07 Esai Morales Just pull out partner.

12:09 Adam Plus, if you're filming, it's, I mean, as an actor, it's a much better, much better crescendo. Otherwise, we got to kind of take the guy's word for it, you know?

12:19 Esai Morales Yeah, I mean, there's lots of creative ways to make him feel, how should I say, fulfilled without exposing yourself too much to that.

12:28 Drew What's your question?

12:29 Caller My question is, is that after that happened, two weeks later, we waited, and then we had sex again, and I got a bacterial infection. They gave me a different kind of cream, and then I took that for a week, and then again, we had sex, and I got another yeast infection, and it's happened four different times with each different infection over the past five and a half months.

12:50 Adam You got to go lesbian at a certain point.

12:53 Esai Morales You know, that's kind of common, that actually happened to me at a certain point.

12:57 Drew You got a yeast infection.

12:58 Adam Yeah.

12:59 Esai Morales I was itching and burning my vaginas. You know I'm a hermaphrodite. You're kidding.

13:04 Adam I think I got some yeasty on the peccary, as I've said on this show before, right?

13:11 Drew Yeah, you did.

13:12 Adam It can happen.

13:12 Esai Morales It can happen.

13:13 Adam You got a little yeasty on the peccary.

13:14 Drew That's actually really unusual.

13:16 Adam Yeah. Well, you got to have a very special penis.

13:19 Drew You got a pristine penis, yeah.

13:20 Esai Morales Also, one thing is if you practice oral sex before intercourse, sometimes the yeast on the tongue gets...

13:28 Drew Oh, that's interesting. That's a good point.

13:30 Esai Morales Yeah, no, it does.

13:30 Drew I never thought about that.

13:31 Esai Morales Yeah. The yeast on the tongue...

13:33 Drew Yeah. Yeah, it can get into the urethra and then get down.

13:36 Esai Morales And not only the urethra, it stays on the surface. The outside. And then when you go in for the kill, that's another big thing. So I would suggest both of you are brushing your teeth before you go.

13:46 Adam Oh, I need a note from you, by the way. This oral sex angle is a strong one.

13:51 Esai Morales It's a good one.

13:51 Drew But, Chrissy, what do they tell you?

13:53 Adam Hey, baby, I love you, but...

13:54 Drew What are your doctors telling you you should be doing here?

13:56 Caller Well, the other problem, which I'm kind of worried about, is that I have HPV.

14:00 Drew Yeah.

14:00 Caller And I got that like five years ago. And it's come back like I've had abnormal pap smears.

14:05 Drew Well, it never, well, only a certain percentage of them goes away.

14:07 Caller I know, but it's, I've actually had to, you know, have my, have it taken care of like three different times. And so I'm wondering, and I haven't, since I've been having these reoccurring infections, I'm wondering, they haven't, usually they check me every three months. I'm wondering possibly if that might be something or?

14:22 Drew No.

14:23 Caller Okay.

14:23 Esai Morales Question, what is your diet like?

14:26 Caller I'm actually really good diet. I've been exercising regularly.

14:31 Esai Morales Do you eat a lot of starches or sugars?

14:34 Caller No, not really.

14:35 Drew But you're not, yeast isn't the problem here. You're getting bacterial infections in the vagina.

14:39 Caller I'm getting them back and forth. And what's weird was about a couple of weeks ago, I had a bacterial infection. And he gave my boyfriend some pills to take. And I took the medicine, the cream, morning and night.

14:49 Drew Well, let me ask you this. Is he documenting this? Are they seeing the culture of these bacteria? Or is he just surmising that's what's going on based on your symptoms?

14:58 Caller Well, I keep asking him, which I'm going to a different doctor in two weeks.

15:02 Drew And you keep asking him what?

15:03 Caller Well, I keep asking, you know, like, did you see bacteria? Did you see yeast? Like what kind? He said, no, I didn't see any.

15:09 Drew Is it a gynecologist?

15:11 Caller Yes.

15:11 Drew And what is your complaint?

15:13 Caller Well, I just, I want to have a normal sex life with my wife.

15:16 Drew Yeah, but what is it you're experiencing that leads them even to look for infection? You know, I'm getting there.

15:20 Esai Morales Yeah, what are the symptoms?

15:20 Adam I mean, she's nuts.

15:21 Esai Morales No, no, no.

15:22 Drew She may be pushing too hard and he may be sort of trying to control symptoms rather than really documenting what's going on. What are the symptoms you're getting?

15:30 Caller Well, it's gotten so that, you know, about two or three days after we have sex, I just start feeling kind of uncomfortable. And then, you know, I'm checking myself and it looks like, you know, a thick cream, cottage cheese, you know, and it's really comfortable. And whenever it feels uncomfortable, I'm just going straight back to him and saying, what do I have now?

15:50 Adam All right, hold on. I cannot, I can't do the first, I cannot devote the first hour to her vagina.

15:55 Drew All right.

15:56 Adam I can't. She's got to go to the gynecologist. You got to sum it up, Drew. All right.

16:00 Drew Just, you know, these things can be treated. Sometimes it's actually coming from the anus. They may be getting some injury up there that way. Sometimes it could be bacteria around his...

16:09 Adam I'm this close not to jerking off when I get home tonight.

16:12 Drew Hang on. Around his pelvic area, making sure he's properly cleansed and whatnot can be important. Esai brought the issue with the mouth. That's important too. But I am concerned that she seems terribly anxious about something that is really quite minor.

16:23 Adam Could they do it in a tub of Clorox just to play it safe?

16:26 Drew Sure they could. But again, I think maybe she ought to sort of sit back a little bit, not run to the doctor every time she has a discharge or a slight irritation, take some warm baths and see if these things don't take care of themselves.

16:38 Esai Morales Am I on?

16:38 Drew Yeah.

16:39 Esai Morales Do you guys hit it right away?

16:41 Drew No, she's not though.

16:41 Esai Morales Oh, she's not. Okay, I was going to ask you, because sometimes if you go at it too quick without properly...

16:46 Drew It could irritate.

16:46 Esai Morales It irritates and then that makes the body react, I would think.

16:50 Adam He says like the Karma Sutra over here.

16:52 Drew It's good. I like about it. No, it's good.

16:54 Esai Morales I have a PhD I see.

16:57 Adam Yeah, no kidding.

16:58 Esai Morales I'm sorry, I had it. It just came out.

17:02 Adam Open for him.

17:02 Drew Deirdre.

17:03 Adam Deirdre.

17:04 Yeah.

17:04 Adam You're 19. What's going on?

17:05 Caller Yeah.

17:08 I'm 130 pounds and my breast size is 34 double D and.

17:14 Adam Game on.

17:15 Caller What's your problem?

17:16 Adam Again, by the way.

17:16 My problem is I don't like the way they look.

17:19 Drew The way they look, the way people look at you.

17:21 Caller Both.

17:22 Esai Morales How do they look? How tall are you?

17:24 5'7, 5'8. I'm not quite sure.

17:27 Esai Morales That doesn't sound terrible.

17:28 Drew It sounds 130?

17:29 Yeah.

17:30 Drew I mean normal, right? You're fat.

17:31 Esai Morales No.

17:31 Adam True. Please.

17:32 Drew Please.

17:33 I'm normally large on me, to me anyway.

17:35 Adam The bread, yeah. You're small and you have big breasts, right?

17:38 Esai Morales People pay lots of money to be in your food document.

17:42 Drew I don't know.

17:42 They're too heavy too.

17:44 Drew Hurt your neck.

17:45 I find bra sizes sometimes.

17:47 Adam I know. Listen, I got the same problem. I'm kind of narrow at the hip and I have huge, huge arms. And it's tough. It's difficult.

17:55 Esai Morales I would say, I would lighten up on the food because the breast is a lot of fat, you know, and if you watch your intake, maybe, because I know a lot of young ladies who, when they lose weight, their breast sizes diminish as well.

18:08 Adam Well, at 130 pounds, we wouldn't really call you over weight, right?

18:12 Caller No, not at all.

18:13 Adam All right. And how's the shape? Is the shape not good or something?

18:17 Caller No, they're fine.

18:18 Caller I mean, they're not droopy or anything.

18:20 Adam Slow down.

18:22 Esai Morales Where do you hang out?

18:25 Adam You got a younger sister?

18:26 Esai Morales Yeah, no, she's 19.

18:28 Adam I'm for you.

18:30 Drew See, this is what drives her crazy, though, is that since she's 14, guys...

18:34 Esai Morales All right, but not 14.

18:35 Drew But since she was 14, women think she's a slut and guys think, look, they're a sex object, right? Isn't that what's been happening? Me? Don't women treat you as badly in a certain way and men treat you in a certain way? Kind of.

18:46 I mean, like, a lot of girls are jealous of me.

18:49 Drew Yeah, and they make up stories about you.

18:51 Yeah, exactly.

18:52 Drew Yeah, it's awful the way we treat women.

18:55 Caller I had a boob enhancer surgery and I didn't.

19:03 Adam Okay. All right. Hold on. What's up tonight with the calls? I think we have a little energy here. Full moon? Oh, is that what it is? Deidre? All right. So does your back hurt?

19:17 Drew Sometimes.

19:17 Adam Okay. But you're 19 years old, so I think that you should live with it for a little bit longer.

19:27 Drew Yeah. You may see this as an asset someday. It's just awfully difficult to have people treating you as an object.

19:32 Adam No, it's not. Listen, what is the difference between a very attractive girl and a girl with large breasts?

19:43 Drew I think a very attractive woman has similar kinds of problems.

19:45 Adam Of course. Good. So what are you going to do if your girl is good-looking? Dump acid on her so she can have a happy life?

19:50 Drew No, that's a great point. All right then. But you're making the same point, which is that this may, it's awful the way we single people out that are exceptional, and she just needs to hang in there.

20:00 Adam Well, listen, I realize, I do want to say, so we haven't talked about it in a while. When you're a 19-year-old woman, you're judged on your looks pretty much across the board by 19, 20-year-old guys, the guys you're going to college with, the guys you went to high school with, when you're anybody, but especially a 19-year-old girl. Now there's women who are tall and lean and blonde and beautiful, and they get put up on a pedestal and no one makes a big deal about it. But they get a ton of attention from men, and they're never sure who their friends are, because every guy's trying to get in their pants, and doors are opening for them. And then there's girls with a large chest who it's the same thing. Guys are talking to them because they want to get in their bra. Guys are trying to look down their shirt. They look at them physically in a sexual way. And we make those women into martyrs. It's like, oh, you poor dear. Oh, you don't know who your friends are. Listen, hot-looking models don't know who their friends are either. It's the same thing. This gives you a leg up on the competition is basically the way I look at it. And I wouldn't look at it as such a horrible liability. Look at it as an asset. And if your back's hurting and your spine is bending, then that's another story. But if it's all emotional, hey, that's just one step up.

21:11 Esai Morales Not only that, but you should do exercises to strengthen your back, number one. Number two, I think your body will catch up maybe with you. You know, you're still growing.

21:18 Adam Yeah, I agree. Easy, easy on the diet. Do some exercises for your back and send those pictures in. There's nothing wrong with that.

21:28 Esai Morales God bless you.

21:29 Adam Listen, you know, I like a big rack and I'm tired of having to defend myself to a lot of men, by the way. Listen, listen, ladies, there's most guys, a lot of guys, don't like the big racks.

21:41 Drew Don't like it?

21:42 Adam Don't like it. They look at it, they talk about it, but when push comes to shove, they'd rather have something a little more moderate.

21:50 Esai Morales More than a mouthful is too much.

21:51 Adam Right, most guys. I work at the Man Show. Every one of those pussies in that office likes a moderate rack.

21:58 Drew But is that just so they can give you grief?

22:01 Adam Partially.

22:02 Drew They mind it or they just prefer?

22:05 Adam If you showed a woman who was what you would call busty, they would rather have a woman who was what you call more in proportion and more moderate.

22:15 Drew I think most men would go for symmetry and proportionality over just about everything else.

22:19 Esai Morales Yeah, but there are some guys, I mean, the event of false boobs out there, the huge ones.

22:24 Adam Yeah.

22:25 Esai Morales They lie a market out there.

22:27 Adam That's right.

22:28 Esai Morales There are some guys that are boob men and they just want biggins.

22:32 Adam Yeah. Wait a minute, that would be a good magazine name. Yeah. Biggins. You know what I mean? To me, that makes me more man, not less man, more. Because you know the difference between a teenage boy and a flat-chested woman? Not a whole lot. Not a lot. But the boobs, there's a difference. All right? So who's more man?

22:53 Esai Morales She's blessed and I think she should learn little by little to be comfortable with herself. If other people lose their dignity, it should make her a stronger person.

23:01 Adam That's right. All right. We will take ourselves a little break. Esai Morales is our guest.

23:06 Esai Morales Esai.

23:06 Adam What did I say? Esai?

23:07 Esai Morales Esai.

23:08 Adam Oh, Esai. I'm sorry. Morales is...

23:11 Esai Morales More or less.

23:14 Adam I've always called you Esai. Hey. All right. Esai Morales is here from NYPD Blue. Ten o'clock. We will take ourselves a little break. And when we come back, we will get with Natalie. Natalie's 17th experience is a pleasure when she urinates after this.

23:32 Hello. Who is this?

23:33 Caller This is Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191. Loveline will be right back.

23:56 Adam Hey, Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla. That's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Esai Morales is our guest tonight. NYPD Blue, tomorrow night, everybody.

24:09 Esai Morales 10 o'clock, ABC.

24:11 Adam There you go. And...

24:13 Esai Morales Adam, I like the way you hold your mic. I'm doing it too. It's a very kind of butch, you know, way of doing it to use my...

24:19 Adam It sort of implies...

24:20 Drew It's called lazy. That's what we do. We'll lean back and you'll enjoy it.

24:23 Adam Also, it sort of implies someone may take it away from me. As if I'm in prison with my microphone.

24:29 Esai Morales Kind of like the homeboys, how they grab their...

24:31 Drew Right.

24:32 Adam Watch the S word.

24:33 Drew Ship?

24:34 Caller Ship, yes.

24:36 Drew I don't know.

24:36 Esai Morales I heard you say jerk off, so I'm assuming anything goes on this station.

24:40 Adam It seems like it, but there's still a few. The ones George Carlin mentioned, actually.

24:45 Esai Morales Oh, the seven...

24:46 Adam That's right. Dirty words. Natalie?

24:49 Caller Yeah?

24:49 Adam You're 17?

24:50 Caller Yep.

24:51 Adam What's up?

24:52 Caller Well, when I pee, like, when I... It sort of feels tingly when I first start, and then when I finish, it's kind of overwhelming, and I feel a lot of pleasure.

25:01 Adam Really?

25:01 Caller Yeah.

25:02 Drew Have you recently been sexually active, or have you been...?

25:04 Caller No, I've had...

25:06 Caller been having sex for a good two years with my boyfriend, when we lost our virginity together.

25:10 Drew There's two ways this can happen. One is you can get an infection, and some women get this way when they have a urine infection. Another way is if you've sort of been overly active and sort of irritated that part of your pelvis.

25:23 Caller Yeah, I've been sort of overly active for last week.

25:28 Drew There you go.

25:29 I spent the whole week at his house.

25:32 Adam Do you have... is it an orgasm that you have or it just feels good?

25:36 Caller It just feels... I don't know. It's really kind of overwhelming because I've never had an orgasm, and I'm not quite sure, but it's kind of... It's really overwhelming, and I'm...

25:45 Esai Morales We got to talk to your guy...

25:46 Caller .getting nervous, and I've been drinking a lot of water.

25:48 Adam I haven't had sex for two years. Never had an orgasm.

25:55 No.

25:55 Esai Morales They're both young.

25:56 Drew They're both 17.

25:57 Adam Does he do any oral sex?

25:58 Believe me, he has one.

26:01 Caller I used to not really feel any comfortable, but I've kind of been letting him do it a little bit. Not really.

26:06 Adam I think there's the angle to work on as far as the orgasm goes.

26:10 Caller I get more pleasure out of him fingering me.

26:13 Adam I see.

26:14 Esai Morales Pointing you out?

26:15 Adam Good to know. I'll put that down in the book. Alright. Well, you guys work it out. You using protection?

26:23 Yeah.

26:25 Drew What are you using?

26:27 He pulls out.

26:28 Drew That is not for... Natalie, please. Who are you kidding?

26:31 Esai Morales They seem pretty committed to each other.

26:33 Drew Yeah, we get that more than...

26:34 Caller We've lost our virginity to each other.

26:36 Drew Yeah, but pulling out is not... You'll still get pregnant pulling out. You understand that?

26:40 Esai Morales It depends on what time of the month.

26:42 Well, I mean...

26:44 Adam Right, but she doesn't know.

26:45 Esai Morales And you don't know how fertile you are. You could be fertile early or late.

26:49 Caller Well, I mean, no, I'm not...

26:51 Drew Natalie, before men ejaculate, they emit sperm.

26:54 Caller Okay.

26:54 Drew Okay, so there's sperm coming out the whole time you guys are active. Do you understand that?

26:58 It's not as concentrated.

26:59 Drew We use condoms. Well, some people actually think you're using condoms and you're on birth control. What did he tell us in the first place?

27:04 Adam Well, I said he called that.

27:06 Esai Morales Because you said protection, you didn't say contraception.

27:09 Caller Well, like sometimes we forget to use the condom when we don't have it.

27:11 Drew Yeah, but you're on the birth control pill. That's nearly 100%.

27:14 Caller Yeah, my parents really don't know, so I just use some orthotricycline and I'm on that.

27:21 Esai Morales But it's a good thing to combine both, just in case.

27:23 Drew She's talking in sort of a riddle. My parents don't know, so I use birth control.

27:28 Adam Are you on the pill or not?

27:30 Caller Yeah, I'm on the pill.

27:30 Adam Okay. And what's the part with your parents not knowing?

27:33 Caller Oh, I don't want them to know.

27:35 I have acne really bad.

27:37 Drew So you tell your parents you're taking the pill for the acne.

27:39 Adam Acutane.

27:40 Caller Yeah.

27:40 Drew No, people take the birth control pill for acne.

27:43 Caller Yeah.

27:43 Adam Are you on accutane?

27:45 Drew No, no, no.

27:46 Adam I know, but when they give you accutane, they will put you on the pill, will they not?

27:49 Drew They will.

27:50 Adam Thank you, wise ass one.

27:52 Drew Are you on accutane?

27:54 Caller They're going to put me on it, but I've been on, they've said, okay, you can try orthotricycline for a while and it's been working and so to help me clear it up.

28:03 Adam Good times, baby.

28:04 Esai Morales Did you know it was against the law? Well, never mind.

28:06 Adam All right. Well, she's not pregnant, she's not having orgasms.

28:11 Drew She needs to get a urine check if it starts getting more painful, if you get fever or anything like that.

28:15 Adam Clem?

28:17 Yeah, hey there, fellas. First of all, I'd like to thank you for taking my call. I sure do appreciate it.

28:20 Adam No problem there. Clem, you're 29.

28:23 Caller Yes, sir. Look, I've been taking what's called remeron for about 5 weeks now and for depression. And I've been having these, jeez, I don't even know how to describe it. It's like, kind of like, well, you know, it makes you real sleepy. And so I take a lot of naps. And so like yesterday afternoon, for example, I was taking a nap. And I sort of half woke up, but I couldn't move at all. Yeah, like I was like trying real hard to move my head or my mouth or something or my arms. I just couldn't do it. And it took me like three or four times before I could actually get up.

29:01 Drew Well, that could be a side effect of the Rembrandt. You should tell whoever's prescribing that for you, you should talk to them about that.

29:06 Caller Yeah, so that's one of the things I was wondering about. I know that there's a, I know that, oh, jeez, what are those other, crap, like Prozac and all that. I know that those work. I tried those before, but he, my doctor said he wanted to try me on this stuff.

29:21 Drew Well, talk to him about this side effect. This may not be something you want to go through.

29:24 Adam Well, should we see if it happens again?

29:26 Caller I'm sorry, what's that?

29:27 Adam It may happen again. It happens to a certain amount of people in NAP.

29:30 Drew Oh, yeah.

29:31 Adam In general.

29:31 Drew Oh, yeah.

29:32 Caller Well, that's true, but it has never happened to me before.

29:34 Adam Yeah, it's got to be a little freaky.

29:36 Caller Yeah, boy, yeah, that's the truth. Tell you what, now.

29:38 Adam But it's got to feel, oh, doggy.

29:41 Caller Tell you what, now.

29:42 Adam Yeah, is this the Colonel?

29:43 Caller Cut that out, now.

29:44 Adam Did you manage Elvis for a while? How big is that belt buckle of yours? But in a way, didn't it feel kind of neat, like I'm so far out of it, I can't move?

29:58 Caller No, that's kind of freaky.

29:59 Drew That's your wacky second episode.

30:00 Adam I like that. Thank you.

30:02 Caller Let me put it this way. It's a terror. No.

30:04 Drew Yeah, it's a terror. It's terrorizing. It's a night terror, I'm sorry.

30:07 Caller Yeah, it was pretty bad, yeah.

30:08 Adam But now thinking back on it, do you think you woke up or do you think you dreamt you woke up and tried to move?

30:14 Caller Well, yeah.

30:14 Adam That's happened to me before.

30:16 Caller No, that's a good point. Actually, I remembered hearing the radio.

30:21 Drew It's a state of sleep, but it's also, you're awake, but there's a disconnect there.

30:26 Adam But what is awake? You know what I mean? I mean, how do you define awake?

30:30 Caller It's like a bee.

30:30 Adam It's like being open awake?

30:31 Esai Morales It's like bee. I've had that and I've never taken Remarock.

30:34 Drew Yeah, some people get it normally.

30:36 Esai Morales Yeah, I've had it and I don't know how, but it's terrifying because you feel like aliens have landed and they've, you know, zapped you and they can do anything they want to do, but you can't do and you're trying to scream, you reach out and you're nothing.

30:49 Adam Sometimes a good fart will get you kickstarted. That's why I always keep one in the chamber when I nap in case there's trouble.

30:56 Drew It's a close relative of being like in a dream where you're trying to scream for help and no one can hear you. Absolutely.

31:02 Caller Dr. Drew, I had one other question about this. I would like to, you know, switch my meds, but I know that there's a discontinuation effect with this Remeron because I missed it for like a couple of days way back and boy, I tell you what, it was horrible.

31:18 Drew You know, personally, I don't prescribe Remeron because it's hard to use for the very reasons that you're describing here.

31:24 Adam Hold on, Clem, did you just say boy howdy?

31:29 Drew Boy and how.

31:30 Adam Oh, boy and how. What do you do for a living, Clem?

31:35 Caller Never mind.

31:37 Esai Morales Tell us, tell us.

31:38 Adam I see you sort of a McLeod type like over there in Maryland.

31:41 Caller Well, okay. Actually, I'm going to burst your image. I mean, I happen to be a graduate student in English.

31:47 Adam There you go.

31:48 Caller Yeah.

31:49 Adam Interesting. But you do Western carvings now for a living or what?

31:52 Esai Morales No, he lives in Maryland.

31:54 Drew What kind of English, what's your area of specialization?

31:57 Caller Well, comparative literature.

31:59 Drew Comparing what and what? I'm sorry? Comparing what and what?

32:03 Adam Dem to des.

32:05 Caller No, actually I study Russian and Soviet literature.

32:09 Esai Morales You speak Russian?

32:12 Caller Yes, I speak Russian.

32:17 Adam What the hell is going on here?

32:22 Esai Morales He does.

32:22 Adam We got a Puerto Rican guy and a guy from the swamp and they're talking in Russian. That's bizarre.

32:28 Esai Morales We are spies.

32:29 Adam Only in America.

32:30 Caller All right, Clem.

32:31 Adam All right. Good times over there.

32:33 Esai Morales Dozvidanya.

32:34 Caller Dozvidanya.

32:35 Adam Yes. I'm going to read some Chekhov when I get home. I'm going to read all about that seagull.

32:40 Esai Morales Hey, you're from Maryland. That's the first place I ever had a job in Pikesville, and I remember the guys say, yeah, Merlin. It's like Merlin the Magician. That's how you say it.

32:48 Caller That's right. Merlin, yeah.

32:49 Esai Morales And you wash your face in the zinc.

32:50 Caller Yeah. I'm actually from Virginia, but I'm a pair of Merlin.

32:55 Adam All right, Glenn. Good times, buddy.

32:57 Esai Morales God bless.

32:57 Drew I just thought of a strange sort of bias I have. Is it guys that talk like that? Shouldn't be depressed.

33:03 Adam Yeah, they should just have some sort of adage where you go. Yeah, pick yourself up by your own bootstraps, and you get your ass in gear, and you get to work, and you put in a good day.

33:14 Esai Morales Homie spoke Russian, dude.

33:16 Drew I know. I'm many people.

33:17 He spoke Russian.

33:18 Drew You don't even have to be Russian. You're Clem.

33:20 Esai Morales He's Clem.

33:21 Adam No, Clemski. You're right. You're right that you picture guys with depression having either like either New York or they're from San Francisco, and they're like they have that sort of artist thing going on.

33:36 Esai Morales Or like that Richard Lewis guy.

33:38 Drew Or they're stressed out. They're stressed, you know, award.

33:41 Adam You don't picture a guy with his dialect or that accent being depressed.

33:46 Drew It's too bright. The whole dialect is very sunny, you know.

33:50 Adam Right. Right. It's like one of the Duke boys meeting Zoloft. Would have made a good episode.

33:58 Drew They're all in the lithium, but go ahead.

34:00 Adam Antonio?

34:01 Caller Yeah. Hey, first of all, I want to say, Drew or yeah, Adam, you're hilarious. And Drew, I know you're bored with them and the men of Mars and Venus, man. You got to be bored with that.

34:12 Adam Yeah. But he's not bored with that money. I'll tell you that, right?

34:16 Esai Morales He's not bored.

34:16 Drew I'm not bored. I'm trying to. No, no, I'm not. We're trying to turn into something.

34:20 Esai Morales You're bored with it.

34:21 Drew You may be bored with it and I apologize for that.

34:23 Caller I realize you're mad, you know, but you should try to get them from that Sam chick, dude. She's hot, man.

34:27 Drew East Side is Sam's friend.

34:28 Esai Morales I went to high school with Samantha.

34:30 Drew No, you went to high school with her?

34:31 Esai Morales I went to high school with her.

34:32 Drew In Brooklyn?

34:33 Esai Morales No, she was from Brooklyn, but in Performing Arts High School.

34:36 Drew In New York.

34:36 Esai Morales The Fame School.

34:37 Drew Yeah, yeah.

34:38 Caller Wasn't she in Penhouse?

34:40 Esai Morales Yeah, I'm sure.

34:41 Caller God, man.

34:42 Esai Morales She's amazing.

34:44 Caller Well, actually, I got two comments. I want to comment on the show last night, because I just listened to it on the East Coast, because I'm in New Orleans, too. Like I was telling the lady on the phone, like, I'm a Christian, so, you know, I'm against abortion, but it kind of sucks, though, that we put that much pressure on women to, like, make them decide and all that, you know?

35:03 Esai Morales No, we don't even make them decide. That's the problem.

35:06 Caller Yeah, and it's like...

35:07 Esai Morales We decide for them, and that's, you know...

35:10 Caller That's not fair, dude.

35:11 Esai Morales Put it this way, I'm Christian, like, based, although I can't take any one side. To me, you know, religions are kind of like gangs nowadays. You know, you gotta pick them and you gotta be true to them and fight to the death on behalf of your God, which I don't think is right. But the whole thing with abortion is, you know, I think a lot of people should take care of the children that are born, that are, you know, that are already living, you know?

35:33 Caller It's like, you know...

35:34 Esai Morales How can you have kids that aren't wanted?

35:36 Caller Right. It's like, why even put... Like me, my mom had me on her 17th birthday, and if it wasn't for my grandmother still being in the picture, I don't know what my mom would have done. Because, like, like I said, I was born on my mom's 17th birthday.

35:47 Esai Morales Right.

35:48 Caller So if it wasn't for my grandmother, my mom probably would have been left with those two options too.

35:53 Esai Morales Or your mom may not even, you know, God forbid, she may not even be there.

35:57 Caller My dad's not around. My dad's irresponsible, so I really, you know, don't see him. I just, it took me getting committed last year to get my dad back in the picture, and he's not even fully back in the picture, you know what I mean?

36:07 Adam Getting committed?

36:09 Caller Well, like, my mom had me in a mental institution for a couple of days.

36:13 Drew For what?

36:14 Caller Like, well, I suffer from depression and all, and I was, like, talking about running away, and so she, like, she just went, and I was in a place out here called Tellamanna. I was in there for, from Saturday to Wednesday.

36:27 Adam All right. And you got, your dad came back into the picture because of that.

36:32 Caller Well, you know, yeah, it had, it actually took her, yeah.

36:35 Adam Right. All right. So here's your job, Antonio. Don't be like your dad.

36:40 Caller Oh, I'm already. Or your mom.

36:41 Adam Don't get pregnant at 17. I agree.

36:43 Esai Morales Don't commit your kids too soon.

36:46 Adam Right. Be around for your child. Right.

36:49 Caller I definitely decided not to be, my dad's been in and out of jail since he's like my age. You know, I've got three or four other younger siblings that are all like infants or whatever. My second thing is, you know, I suffer from depression and part of it is cause like, I've got like a lot of female friends and all, and there's girls that I care about, but I personally can't get a girlfriend. I don't know if it's something wrong with me or not.

37:13 Drew You know, you're 16. Relax.

37:15 Esai Morales Trust me. Wait till you have a steady job and prospects and things like that, you become more attractive to the opposite sex.

37:21 Adam My God. Oh my God.

37:24 Drew That is one of the cruel aspects of the female mystique.

37:29 Esai Morales Yeah. Well, you know, they got a clock, they say, and so they have an agenda and that agenda is to find the best mate they can and you got to have something to offer.

37:38 Adam Rarely does their agenda jive with yours at 16.

37:42 Drew No.

37:43 Adam I mean, you know, if it's 16, you could date 11 year olds. Maybe you'd have something there. But other 16 year olds, that's rough at 16.

37:52 Esai Morales Yeah. Another thing is I couldn't, I didn't have a girlfriend for till I was like 19.

37:58 Adam Yeah. It happens to the best and worst of us. So I mean, look at it this way. Think about the guys you knew at 16 who were getting a lot of chicks. They were the upper whatever percent of the 16 year olds. Only the cream of the 16 year old male crop had chicks. When you get 25, everybody gets somebody. It's not just the top 3 percent.

38:21 Esai Morales And that top 3 percent usually is kind of like played out by, you know. Trust me, your best years are yet to come. Be comfortable with yourself and women will be comfortable with you.

38:32 Adam All right. We will take ourselves a little break. Esai Morales is here from NYPD Blue and we'll be back.

38:41 Caller Loveline will be right back.

39:14 Caller Hey, this is Tyra Banks, and you're listening to Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

39:20 Adam Yes, you is. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. I'm Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew over there. Esai Morales is our guest tonight from NYPD Blue, ABC, tomorrow night, Tuesday nights, 10 o'clock. First big episode for Esai, right?

39:38 Esai Morales Yeah, I'm the boss now.

39:40 Adam Yeah.

39:40 Esai Morales I'm the lieutenant for New Loo.

39:42 Adam Nice.

39:43 Esai Morales They work for me.

39:46 Adam Isn't it? You put the piece and the badge on, do you start to feel like that guy?

39:52 Esai Morales Yes.

39:53 Drew Yeah.

39:53 Esai Morales Oh man, it just has an effect on you.

39:56 Adam Yeah, it does. I did something for The Man Show where I played a cop, a couple of weeks back.

40:01 Drew You started to beat the crap out of people?

40:03 Adam Just the blacks. I got in the LAPD uniform, and the shoes, and the strap on that holster and everything, and the nightstick, and you just start walking up and down the boulevard, and you see people get out of your way a little.

40:18 Esai Morales Salute, you know, SIGCHIO.

40:21 Adam Yeah, I did a little goose step, and I felt, he's still feeling pretty good. I could see it. Any uniform is good for a guy.

40:28 Esai Morales Hey, you know, these women are very sexy in uniform as well.

40:31 Adam Yeah, but, but, but women like a guy in a uniform, and men respect a guy in a uniform, too, and I could, whether it's a football uniform or a cop uniform, I can see that feeling pretty good. Chris? Yeah. You're 20?

40:46 Caller Yes, I am.

40:46 Adam What's up?

40:48 Caller Um, well, about seven or eight years ago, um, I had, I had touched my sister's, mm-hmm, in a way I shouldn't have, and it was before, when I was about, I think I was like nine or so, um, I had touched a little boy as well, and when I touched this little boy, he had, he did it at a church, and the youth pastor caught me and told my parents about it, and, um, my stepdad talked to me about it and everything, and I ended up touching my sister's as well, and what my question is basically is, should I tell my parents about it or not? I do regret it, I regret it.

41:27 Drew Let me ask a couple questions. Did something happen to you growing up?

41:31 Caller I don't know if it did or not, I know it's possible you can forget, you may not know, but remember your head.

41:36 Drew And do you have any impulses to be with little kids right now?

41:40 Caller No I don't.

41:41 Drew How are your sisters doing? Are they able to have relationships? Are they developing normally?

41:45 Esai Morales How old are they?

41:47 Caller Well one of them is ten right now, the other one is eight.

41:52 Drew You did it when they were infants?

41:54 Caller I did it when one was two and the other one, I know they were both around two when I ended up, I did it with each one of them, it wasn't at the same time.

42:04 Adam How many, how many, hello, Chris?

42:06 Caller Yeah.

42:06 Adam How many times did you do it?

42:09 Caller I did it probably a couple of times on each.

42:14 Adam And I guess it's an interesting question in the sense that obviously they probably don't have any memory of it, at least none that's on this sort of, that they could summon up, but does it affect them in some internal way?

42:32 Esai Morales Does it affect, what's your relationship like with them now because maybe do they act different with you? I mean, the urge I feel of saying is not your parents as much as them. If they have any recollection, you have to confront them and say that, you know, you did something wrong that you regret and that you've misplaced affection. I don't know what to call it, but...

42:52 Adam That's not a bad way of putting it, but on the other hand, you think, geez, if they're 10 and they don't remember anything and they're getting along fine, why freak them out?

43:01 Drew Are they getting along okay?

43:02 Caller Yeah.

43:04 Adam Oh, boy. Hello? Uh-oh. Hello?

43:07 Drew Well, yeah, I was going to say, I think you ought to talk to a professional because it's serious enough material that you ought to be sorted through very carefully.

43:16 Adam Hold on, Chris, you there?

43:17 Drew Yeah.

43:17 Adam Yeah, what happened? You don't know?

43:20 Drew I don't know. You leaned up against the phone.

43:22 Adam Okay. How are you doing in your life?

43:25 Caller I'm doing okay. I have a good serious relationship with a girl right now. She's my age.

43:31 Adam Does she know about this?

43:33 Caller She knows about the boy, but she doesn't know about my sisters.

43:36 Adam All right. Yeah, I agree and maybe you didn't hear Drew say that this is the kind of thing that you should maybe talk about. It's not the kind of thing you should stumble into or rush into.

43:46 Drew Nor is it something you should listen to. You should determine after talking to somebody for two minutes on the radio. You should sit down with a professional and talk about your feelings about this and make a plan of what needs to be done.

43:55 Esai Morales And make sure you're not withholding or suppressing any feelings that might rear again later.

44:03 Adam On the other hand, as much as we try to get at the truth and talk about all the issues here, we're not necessarily for him telling them, per se.

44:15 Drew I mean, really, the only thing it would serve is for him to be brought to justice, frankly. You understand? I mean, that's the only...

44:24 Adam And what justice is this 10-year-old boy going to be brought to?

44:28 Drew Yeah.

44:29 Adam You know what I mean? I don't think there's any criminal charges that would be leveled against him as a 10-year-old.

44:34 Drew I don't know.

44:35 Adam I doubt that, especially 10 years later. And if, I don't know, better they be two than seven, I think. I don't know, and only time will tell.

44:46 Esai Morales I'm not suggesting that, but he's...

44:49 Adam If you have a choice, I'm saying, I think it's better that it happened at some point where they probably don't have any cognitive memory of it. Talk to a therapist. I'm glad things are working out okay now. For everybody. For him, yeah.

45:04 Esai Morales I would just say, yeah, as they get older, and you can be frank with them, just ask them if there are anything they ever want to talk to you about. If there's anything in their memories, just I would go on what I call a selective fishing trip.

45:16 Adam Interesting.

45:16 Esai Morales Because if there is something, they may be repressing. Because children even at that age remember things. But it depends on how extensive and how invasive.

45:25 Drew This is Gary. Gary.

45:27 Hello.

45:28 Adam Hey, you're 40. What's up?

45:30 Caller I'm 40. Yeah.

45:31 It's a lovely age.

45:32 Caller I actually called because I'm a really huge fan of Esai Morales.

45:35 Esai Morales Here he is. Thank you.

45:37 Caller Yes, I have loved you forever.

45:39 Esai Morales Oh my gosh. Thank you so much.

45:41 Caller Ladies, the least thing you've ever been in, I've watched it and you've recently were in Resurrection Boulevard and you're going to be on NYPD Blue now?

45:49 Esai Morales That's right. I'm the new guy. Yeah. It's fun to have a steady gig that people can see on a weekly basis.

45:56 Caller Yes. It will be on every Tuesday now.

45:58 Esai Morales Yeah.

45:58 Caller Great. Now, you're not going to make any more appearances on the Resurrection Boulevard at show time?

46:02 Esai Morales As a matter of fact, they just hired a friend of mine, a wonderful actor named Leon, to play the love interest for Bee Bee, the gal that was my ex-wife. So I'm sure my character is going to crawl out of the woodwork somewhere and have a problem with this. And I'm sure they're laying the groundwork for some drama. So as soon as I finish my last episode on NYPD, we're going to start talking about getting back on resurrection.

46:29 Adam Yeah. Good boxing show.

46:30 Caller Yeah.

46:31 Adam Jerry?

46:31 Caller Yeah.

46:32 Adam We got to go to break.

46:33 Caller I know you do. And I'm sure I don't have a sex problem.

46:35 Adam That's all right.

46:36 Esai Morales Oh no. Hey, listen, it's all good. At 40, you got them all ironed out.

46:40 Caller I just had to say hi to you. So I love you.

46:42 Esai Morales Thank you, Jerry. Love you back.

46:43 Caller Okay.

46:44 Adam Bye. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

46:50 Caller Um, back in a minute.

47:27 Adam Hey, thanks for the cue, Esay. It's the Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That's Dr. Drew. Esai Morales is our guest tonight. NYPD Blue, Tuesday nights, tomorrow night, 10 o'clock, A-B-C. And let's hop back to the phone. So let's speak to Jessica, who's 19. Jessica?

47:47 Caller Hello.

47:47 Adam What's up?

47:48 Caller Hey, I was just wondering, I'm two and a half months pregnant. I have a three-year-old little girl, and I was just wondering, um, I can't tell if I'm, like, going through depression or if I'm just, like, all moody because I'm pregnant.

48:03 Adam What happened with your first pregnancy?

48:05 Caller What do you mean?

48:06 Drew Did you get depressed after that or during that?

48:09 Caller Oh, um, no, I was fine.

48:11 Drew Yeah? Yeah, but it doesn't always happen every time.

48:13 Adam No, I'm just curious if, uh, you know, I mean, it'd be an easy fix if you were crying two months in to your first one.

48:21 Caller I was thinking, but no, um, actually I hid my, my first pregnancy for a long time.

48:25 Drew Nice. Uh, are, are there...

48:27 Adam Were you 15 the first time around?

48:29 Caller Yeah.

48:29 Drew Are there things you're dealing with now that are stressful to you or depressing?

48:33 Caller Well, I, I have my own place now.

48:35 Drew Yeah?

48:36 Esai Morales That makes you cry a lot.

48:37 Caller I'm on my own now, so I guess maybe.

48:39 Adam Where's, uh, where's dad?

48:41 Caller Um, he's around.

48:44 Adam You're, uh, I mean...

48:45 Caller We're together, I guess.

48:46 Adam You are?

48:46 Drew What are you experiencing? What are the symptoms?

48:49 Caller I can't get out of bed sometimes, but I don't know if it's just because I'm tired from being pregnant or if I'm just like...

48:56 Drew Depressed. What else?

48:56 Caller Yeah, just depressed. Um, I cry all the time, like for little things. And then I was thinking, well, that's kind of, you know, um, what they say about being pregnant, you're always crying.

49:05 Drew Sure.

49:06 Caller And, um, I get like real stressed with my daughter.

49:10 Drew Irritable.

49:11 Caller Yeah.

49:12 Drew Anything else? Sleep messed up, eating messed up?

49:15 Caller Well, yeah, I wake up like at five o'clock every morning.

49:18 Drew All right. Well, that's depression.

49:19 Adam Really?

49:20 Drew Yeah.

49:20 Adam Not being able to sleep?

49:21 Drew Early awakening.

49:22 Adam Really?

49:23 Caller Oh, really?

49:23 Drew Yeah.

49:23 Adam I mean, I'd go through it all new when I was depressed.

49:26 Drew That's another kind of depression. But early waking is a classic depression.

49:29 Caller Yeah.

49:29 Drew Irritability.

49:30 Adam I'm old school, though.

49:31 Drew Irritability, early awakening, and, you know, easy tears, lack of meaning, lack of enjoyment, things like that.

49:35 Caller So it couldn't be just because I'm pregnant? It is.

49:37 Drew Well, you're certainly in a profoundly biologically altered state, and that might be changing your brain chemistry to the point that you develop a depression, but you're depressed. And somebody ought to be sort of, whoever is taking care of your pregnancy, do you have an obstetrician?

49:49 Caller Yeah, I do.

49:49 Drew All right, be discussing with him or her and let them sort of help you through this.

49:53 Adam Is this guy the dad of both or just the second one?

49:55 Drew Oh, yeah, it's the same dad.

49:56 Adam Oh, yeah?

49:57 Drew Yeah.

49:57 Adam Wow.

49:58 Esai Morales Good times. Another little silly question, and your diet, has it changed since the first thing because diet does have an effect on your moods?

50:06 Caller Oh, for my first pregnancy or before I got pregnant?

50:09 Adam Both.

50:12 Caller Before I got pregnant, I was eating as, I wasn't eating really because I had my tongue pierced, so now I don't eat as much.

50:19 Adam Yeah. Good plan, mama.

50:21 Esai Morales That's a weight loss program.

50:22 Adam Yeah.

50:23 Caller No, I just...

50:23 Adam There you go...

50:24 Caller .did it on spur of the moment, so...

50:26 Drew Yeah, but you need extra calories when you're pregnant, right?

50:28 Caller Oh, yeah. No, before I got pregnant...

50:30 Drew I see. So you're eating better now. You're eating better now.

50:32 Caller Yeah, now I'm eating better.

50:33 Esai Morales What's better? Lots of fat or just sugars and stuff? Because my blood sugar goes way up and then when it goes down I forget it. I could pass out or I get moody and it's...

50:42 Caller Actually, yeah, I need like a lot of sugar. Like I crave a lot of sugar.

50:46 Esai Morales The craving of sugar is, I think, a mineral deficiency. I'm not sure.

50:50 Drew Well, she's in a chronically deficient state because she's trying to build another body. I mean, they get incredibly depleted during pregnancy. But maybe it is a reasonable idea to meet with a nutritionist and make sure your diet is adequate. Are you taking proper iron supplements?

51:04 Caller No, I'm not taking iron supplements.

51:06 Drew There's a ton of stuff.

51:07 Caller My prenatal pills are low iron, so.

51:09 Drew Yeah, did they ask you to take iron?

51:11 Caller No, I'm not anemic, so I guess they didn't.

51:13 Drew All right. But just make sure that you're getting adequate nutrients.

51:16 Esai Morales Yeah, you're getting the full spectrum because a lot of people, especially at your age, they have no clue about the variety of things you should be eating, like live foods, fresh foods, and from all colors, like the oranges, your greens, get your yellows and reds, get your beets in there. But just try to eat as varied a diet as possible.

51:33 Adam I like the white foods myself, the Wonder Breads, the Rices.

51:38 Caller They told me not to eat white bread.

51:39 Adam Oh, all right.

51:40 Esai Morales Thank you.

51:41 Adam I like a bread you can make into a nice dough ball in your hand and then shape it in the shape of a fist and then just ram that up your ass.

51:47 Esai Morales A Chia loaf.

51:48 Adam That's the way I eat. Hey Jessica, hey no more kids, huh sister?

51:52 Caller Oh yeah, no more. I'm going to college, so.

51:54 Adam All right, baby.

51:55 Drew And take care of two kids? Wow.

51:56 Adam That's good.

51:57 Esai Morales Hey listen, you know, God bless you and keep your wits about you.

52:00 Caller All righty, thanks.

52:01 Adam All right, remember your momma.

52:03 Caller Oh no.

52:03 Adam Easy with them tongue piercings.

52:06 Caller Yeah.

52:06 Drew Got nipples pierced too?

52:07 Esai Morales Just think of your kid asking you to do it at about eight or nine.

52:10 Caller Oh yeah, she wants tattoos already, cause she sees mine. So she's like, can I have a tattoo? And I say no.

52:16 Adam Well listen, don't let her get any pants until she's six, right?

52:20 Drew Oh yeah, yeah. Oh my God.

52:22 Adam All right.

52:23 Esai Morales Okay.

52:24 Drew Thanks.

52:24 Adam All right.

52:24 Esai Morales Easy on the ink.

52:27 Adam Yep. All right, mama. You know, it's weird. It's so weird when you get older and you look back at people who are old to their kids, but we look at them as effed up teenagers, essentially. I'm sure that's been going on throughout history. We just have a little different perspective doing this show and being the age we are, but oh man. Yeah. It's going to be hard to tell your kids, by the way, not to get the tats, not to get the piercings when mom and dad are sporting them.

52:56 Esai Morales Right. And I want to know when teen pregnancy was not an issue. You know, we keep talking about it. We want to eradicate teen pregnancy.

53:04 Adam Well, when people died at 30, it wasn't an issue.

53:06 Esai Morales Yeah.

53:07 Adam As soon as everyone started making it until 75 or 80, I guess it became an issue. Jen?

53:12 Yeah.

53:12 Adam You're 21?

53:13 Caller Hi.

53:14 Adam What's up?

53:15 Caller I was just wondering what the long-term effects of drinking alcohol with painkillers is.

53:21 Drew Which painkiller?

53:23 Caller Vicodin, Valium, Percocet.

53:28 Adam Is Valium considered a painkiller?

53:29 Drew No, it's not. How much Vicodin and Percocet are you taking?

53:33 Caller Maybe like one with every four drinks.

53:37 Drew How much Vicodin and Percocet are you taking per day?

53:41 Caller I'll take it like maybe once or twice a week.

53:43 Drew The Vicodin and Percocet?

53:45 Caller Yeah.

53:45 Drew So primarily it's alcohol you're using?

53:48 Caller Yeah.

53:49 Drew And the Valium, how much Valium are you using?

53:51 Caller Not that much.

53:53 Drew How much Valium?

53:54 Caller I don't really use it anymore, but I was using it a couple months ago.

53:58 Drew How much?

54:00 Caller Like one or two.

54:03 Esai Morales Five milligrams, ten milligrams.

54:04 Adam A what?

54:05 Esai Morales One or two?

54:06 Caller A little blue one.

54:07 Drew How often?

54:10 Caller I had a spurt with those for about a couple weeks.

54:14 Drew Hang on a second, Jen, you're not answering the questions. How many per day of those pills were you taking?

54:21 Caller About one.

54:22 Drew One a day, okay. So alcohol is the primary drug, and really this is more about alcoholism than anything else. At the level of Percocet and Vicodin you're taking, there's a fair amount of Tylenol in those, and if you really have significant alcoholic liver disease, you can actually precipitate liver failure. But at your age, at the level you're drinking, for the duration you've been drinking, it would be very, very unlikely you had that degree of liver damage.

54:43 Adam Jen, you're calling in about essentially being hooked on pain killers, yet you're taking a couple a week. I mean, a lot of people take 40, 50 Vicodin a day.

54:53 Caller Okay, I was just wondering, when I do take them, I drink with them.

54:56 Drew Yeah, what she's read is that people that are alcoholics can have a die of liver failure from 3 Tylenol. There are cases like that out there. But those are people who have usually been drinking for years and years and have advanced alcoholic liver disease. But women are five times more likely to get cirrhosis than men. You may have some liver disease. Oh, yeah.

55:13 Adam Nice to know.

55:14 Drew You may have some liver disease and it could be meaningful, but not life-threatening. The issue here is you have addiction and that needs to be treated. That's what's threatening to your life.

55:22 Adam You're saying women are five times more likely to get cirrhosis of the liver than men?

55:27 Drew At the same level of alcohol consumption, they are five times more likely to get cirrhosis. They're smaller. They lack an enzyme in the stomach that converts alcohol.

55:34 Adam I see. But they just don't drink as much as men. I mean, you don't hear about, like for instance, every other month, you'll hear about some male celebrity who's been floating around for a while, was in a band in the 60s getting a liver transplant.

55:47 Drew That's Hepatitis C. That's Hepatitis C.

55:49 Adam That's not from boozing. But a lot of these guys were pretty strong drinkers, too.

55:53 Drew Hepatitis C plus booze makes cirrhosis, period. That gives you cirrhosis.

55:58 Esai Morales That's a formula.

55:58 Drew Yeah, that's a formula for cirrhosis. And a lot of guys do that stuff.

56:01 Adam But how many women are receiving liver transplants as opposed to men? I just don't hear about it.

56:06 Drew But because you're not typically transplanting alcoholics. It's the hepatitis C patients getting the transplants.

56:10 Adam But you still answer my question.

56:14 Drew Not so many.

56:14 Adam Not as many women getting hepatitis as men?

56:17 Drew In not as many getting hepatitis C.

56:19 Adam Why not?

56:20 Drew That's historically, I don't know if I can ask that accurately, that's a heroin disease. I mean, that's IV drug using disease. Which one? Hepatitis C. And I will tell you, in my world, predominantly liver disease, women, the population I treat.

56:36 Adam Oh, really?

56:36 Drew Oh, yeah.

56:37 Adam But you just don't hear about the transplant as much.

56:39 Drew Because they aren't transplanting the alcoholics.

56:40 Adam Can you do a man liver to a woman?

56:43 Drew Probably.

56:44 Adam Yeah? Man liver bigger?

56:47 Drew No, no, I'm more thinking in terms of the genetic markers. I don't know.

56:51 Adam Hmm. Let's check in to that. Would you, Drew?

56:54 Drew Sure. All right. I'll get right on it. I'll get to the answer. By the way, did Jen call you?

56:59 Adam Oh, Jen, last night, who was going to give me some data on women who are on the birth control pill being much more likely candidates to get HIV? And I said that's because if that is, in fact, the data, it's because women on birth control are sexually active and oftentimes not using condoms. They're on the birth control pill.

57:20 Esai Morales Let's change the subject because I have a lot of issues with the test not being accurate.

57:26 Adam I'll gladly change it. I just yelled at her and told her, give me the data on that. She didn't have any data. And so I told her she was a liar.

57:33 Esai Morales There was a lot of nonsense with the science or supposed science behind HIV and AIDS and that could be a whole two hours.

57:40 Adam Well, this wasn't that. This was a separate issue, that aside. But she never did call on that.

57:47 Drew Chelsea, 26.

57:48 Caller Hi, I'm Adam and Dr. Drew. And I'm sorry, I don't know how to pronounce your name.

57:53 Esai Morales Esai.

57:54 Caller Esai, hi.

57:55 Esai Morales How are you?

57:55 Caller I'm good. First of all, I want to tell Adam that I know people say this to you all the time, but you are literally the funniest guy.

58:02 Caller Yes, literally, literally.

58:04 Caller No, I'm serious.

58:05 Esai Morales It's the funniest guy in his hat, that's so funny you should say that.

58:08 Caller Yeah.

58:09 Caller He's really, like, there's other people that sometimes come on the show that have taken your place, kind of, and like it's just not the same, so I just want to tell you you're really, really funny.

58:18 Adam Thank you, but we intentionally get bad guys to fill in for me, so it seems like I'm good.

58:22 Drew Well, you insist upon it. Come on now.

58:23 Caller Okay.

58:24 Caller Well, even in society, like wherever, you're really, really funny.

58:26 Adam Thank you, thank you very much.

58:28 Drew Yeah, even in nature, as you roam the streets.

58:30 Adam It's funnier than a raccoon or a homeless guy, is what you're saying.

58:33 Esai Morales Even in Eugene, Oregon.

58:35 Caller I'm really trying to give you a compliment here.

58:37 Adam I do appreciate it, and don't worry. I have labeled myself a genius a long, long ago.

58:43 Caller Okay. Well, actually, what I called for is because I hear a lot of people calling in like just two times in the last couple of nights and previously, people talking about the sleep paralysis, and I wanted to say like I experienced that. I started experiencing that like about 10 years ago when I was taking a lot of naps because I was depressed and so I was sleeping a lot during the day and I would have these episodes all the time like nearly every single day, I would wake up from a nap and just literally be paralyzed. It was really terrifying for me. This happened for several years and finally, I was listening to something like Art Bell or something like that, talking about some wacky stuff and he was talking about lucid dreaming and how this sleep paralysis is actually like one door to get into lucid dreaming. Lucid dreaming, by the way, is when you are lucid in your dream as the name would denote or whatever. So instead of being really scared when this happened to me, I would just lay there and kind of accept it and it was really, really cool because instead of being terrified, it's like I went into a dream right then and I could totally control my dream. And so now when I'm in that state, instead of being frightened, it's actually like liberating. Yeah, it's really wonderful and you can, you can do anything. Like they talk about flying in your dreams and that's like the first thing.

1:00:07 Caller But you can control them.

1:00:09 Adam I mean, except for the problem is I've tried this before, you know you're controlling it and that screws it up sometimes.

1:00:16 Caller No.

1:00:16 Adam Like the time I tried to rape Adrian Barbeau in my dream when I was in high school.

1:00:21 Caller Well, I mean, I swear to Christ, I did what takes a little practice.

1:00:25 Caller There's this really great book called Exploring the World of Lucid Dreaming. Yeah, a man named Steven LeBurge. And like, I mean, it is it is something that you need to practice a little bit. But once you start doing it, then like I'm I guess I'm just trying to tell people not to be scared of this sleep paralysis thing. Like don't feel terrified.

1:00:43 Adam Yeah, I was I was saying I would dig it.

1:00:45 Caller Be like, yeah, I know. I heard you say that.

1:00:48 Caller And that's pretty right on.

1:00:50 Adam Thanks. No, like, you know, you know, it's interesting. I think most humans have a need and a want to lose control. I mean, we like substance for that reason.

1:01:02 Drew We have a desire to alter.

1:01:04 Adam Alter.

1:01:04 Esai Morales Yeah.

1:01:04 Adam And we like sex for that reason, too, because for the ten minutes you're doing it or the two and a half minutes you're doing it.

1:01:12 Esai Morales Right.

1:01:13 Drew You're altered.

1:01:14 Adam And what we love is human beings is getting out of it.

1:01:18 Esai Morales That's why we want to control so much. We want control so that we can lose it.

1:01:23 Adam But we want mushrooms, we want heroin, we want booze. We want a movie. People love to sit for two hours in a place and be somewhere else. Somewhere. And sleep is great that way and sex is great that way. And if you can kind of control it, if you can do it on your own terms, because it can be a very provocative experience. When I was in high school, as you know, Drew, I did some experimenting with this. I said I'm going to control my dreams. I wanted to grab Adrienne Barbeau's boobs. So I said I will work her into a dream and I will know I'm in a dream. Instead of acting like I would act in normal society, I'll act like I would in a dream and I'll get my kicks. So I was at a mall. I was at the Fashion Square Mall in Studio City, Sherman Oaks area and here came Adrienne Barbeau. I knew I was in a dream.

1:02:18 Esai Morales You had a dry dream.

1:02:19 Adam I'm going to grab some of them boobs. I went over there and grabbed her sweater and she started screaming so loud. I can't even figure my own goddamn dreams out. She started flailing and screaming and I was thinking to myself, listen, quiet down now. It's my dream and I know what I'm doing. She made such a ruckus that I went away.

1:02:37 Esai Morales She's still scared of you, Adam.

1:02:40 Adam She knows what's good for her. She is. I screwed that one up pretty good. But the problem is, when you know you're in a dream, then you're not really in a dream. Rebecca?

1:02:48 Caller Hi.

1:02:49 Adam You're 19?

1:02:50 Caller Yes, I'm 19.

1:02:51 Adam What's up?

1:02:51 Caller Hi. I had a separate problem. So how are you guys tonight?

1:02:56 Adam Good. Do you really care? What's your problem?

1:02:59 Caller Okay. First of all, me and my boyfriend have been together for about three years now, and we were each other's first, right? Like we started like in high school and everything. Now we're at a high school and he lives with me, and we probably have sex probably about three times a week. I just had a problem because like, okay, we use condoms. We use condoms and he pulls out. We're really, really, really cautious.

1:03:22 Drew What's the question?

1:03:23 Caller Okay. The question is sometimes like when I'm reaching my peak, I know it's kind of embarrassing, but I guess when I reach my peak, like sometimes I'll pee on him and it's very, very embarrassing.

1:03:33 Drew You sure it's urine? Is it maybe a female ejaculation?

1:03:36 Caller No, I'm not sure, but I'm pretty sure it's urine.

1:03:40 Esai Morales That happened to me once.

1:03:41 Drew Well, there's two things. It's actually very common.

1:03:43 Adam Let's smack that dude right in the face.

1:03:46 Drew One is female orgasmic incontinence where you do pee and the other is where you actually have an ejaculation and both produce a tremendous amount of fluid.

1:03:55 Adam Does it squirt out or does it dribble out?

1:03:57 Caller Well, like the first, like it happened about four times. And the first time, it would just like kind of just a little bit dribble out. But the last time, it kind of came out a lot. And I had to like jump off of him and run to the restroom.

1:04:07 Drew So you can continue to pee. And finish urinating. Did you finish urinating after you?

1:04:12 Caller Yeah, I did.

1:04:13 Drew All right. You might want to check to see if you have a urine infection. That's one of the things that can trigger it like this.

1:04:16 Caller I was thinking maybe it was probably the condoms I was using.

1:04:19 Drew No, no, no, no.

1:04:21 Caller Because I noticed it would start happening when I used the spermacidal condoms.

1:04:25 Drew Well, it could be irritable. Yeah, the spermicide, that's sure. It could be irritating. But more importantly, you want to make sure there's not a urine infection going on.

1:04:30 Esai Morales I'm not a doctor, but I hate the concept of spermacidal lubricants in there.

1:04:35 Drew Okay, well.

1:04:36 Esai Morales The Noxinol 9, they got rid of that in the sponge because it was giving women toxic shock. It's okay to put it on your boyfriend's willy.

1:04:44 Adam It's not all that effective, is it?

1:04:46 Drew Noxinol 9, you occlude any body space, you get toxic shock. I've treated toxic shock from people getting nasal packages without Noxinol 9.

1:04:52 Adam What's a nasal package?

1:04:53 Drew You know, after a nose surgery, they pack it in cotton. Oh, right.

1:04:55 Esai Morales So why did they take it away from the sponge? They got rid of it in the sponge.

1:04:59 Drew What do they put in now? They have some other time.

1:05:01 Caller I don't know. I just, I'm not sure.

1:05:04 Adam So what should Rebecca do, by the way? Nothing?

1:05:06 Drew Rebecca, listen. Did you hear me say about possibly urine infection?

1:05:09 Caller Yes, yes I did.

1:05:10 Drew You gotta get that checked out.

1:05:11 Caller Yeah, I think I will. Thank you very much.

1:05:13 Esai Morales Otherwise, hats off to your boyfriend.

1:05:16 Adam Yeah, that's right. He's working. He's getting something out of you.

1:05:20 Caller Thanks.

1:05:20 Adam Yeah. You know, I had a discussion with a couple of my buddies about something coming out of women last weekend. And it's basically the consensus that we've talked about on the show, which is wine. It's a great novelty. It's something. If it was wine, if it was like that, it would be great.

1:05:38 Drew You say you tire of it. You get this.

1:05:39 Adam I think where most guys stand on that is, it'd be cool at the beginning. Yeah, because they're actually eliciting of a physical response, which is kind of cool.

1:05:50 Esai Morales A loss of control.

1:05:51 Adam Yeah, you know they ain't faking it. But by year number three, the novelty has worn off.

1:05:57 Esai Morales That depends.

1:05:59 Caller Yeah. If you're a very passionate, passionate man, depends the diaper.

1:06:05 Adam Yeah, if you're a super, super passionate man like Drew, you can never get enough female ejaculation. Drew wishes he could ring vaginas and make himself a big cold pitcher of that stuff he could down every morning before he left the house. But if you're a simple man like myself, who's confused about his sexuality, the first few times would probably be enough. I'd be over it after that. After like year number three I'd be like honey, I get it, you're having an orgasm.

1:06:33 Drew I would think that after a few months that you'd have sort of a system worked out where you'd just be.

1:06:37 Adam You got the hell out of Dodge?

1:06:38 Drew You'd have a system. You'd have gutters or whatever the hell you do. You'd have it figured out. And so it wouldn't be so troubling.

1:06:44 Adam Something I haven't talked about in a while and I still think it would work is the mattress hole, the orifice in the mattress. I think mattresses, whatever. I think mattresses should come with a nice padded hole in them. Not too big, just about the size of a coffee can around that you could sleep with your erection in.

1:07:05 Esai Morales A mayonnaise jar maybe?

1:07:07 Adam I was thinking more of a gutter system that just fed to the outside of the house. That someone got sick and needed to heave. They'd go in there if you had to yurt. Let's suppose you're really loaded and you fell asleep on your belly. You'd just relieve yourself right in it. Just drop it in the hole. You get an erection. It doesn't flip you over. Yeah, yeah, something, I could have used one hundreds of times in my day.

1:07:28 Esai Morales Make a diagram. We'll work on this.

1:07:30 Adam Remember where you heard it first. That's all I'm saying.

1:07:32 Esai Morales One quick thing about the female thing. It depends sometimes if it is urine, if it's strong. There was a time where I didn't know what it was and it didn't smell like urine.

1:07:45 Drew Sometimes it isn't. Sometimes it's female.

1:07:47 Esai Morales Who's doing that? Sorry, I'm a little incontinent but you don't know if someone is gushing.

1:07:56 Drew It could just be gushing. It can be female ejaculate.

1:07:58 Adam Wow. Some women produce that in the gland.

1:08:04 Esai Morales No, it's the ultimate compliment.

1:08:06 Drew Without even peeing.

1:08:09 Adam Right. That transexual was the best he's had. Let's take ourselves a break. When we come back, we'll speak to Heather. Breast size is 38EE.

1:08:19 Caller Triple E.

1:08:20 Bouncy Bouncy.

1:08:21 Adam Wants to know about that after this.

1:08:23 Caller Hello, this is your radio. Love Line will be right back.

1:09:04 Hi, I'm Jerry Springer, and you're listening to Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:09:08 Drew Jared, Pevlovian.

1:09:09 Adam Hey, it's Loveline. There you go, we're talking.

1:09:13 Drew He said, how do we know we put our headphones on? How do we know that?

1:09:15 Adam Oh, I don't know.

1:09:16 Drew Pevlovian, we just...

1:09:17 Esai Morales It's like glicking, you know?

1:09:19 Adam Figured it's been about four minutes. Esai Morales is our guest tonight. He is from NYPD Blue Tuesday Nights, ABC, 10 o'clock. And we were having an interesting discussion, at least interesting to us, off the air, about the phenomenon known as glicking.

1:09:38 Drew The ancient phenomenon.

1:09:39 Adam Yes. And this is something, and Anderson just called it gleeking. We called it glicking. It's always funny when people get freaked out about they get big arguments over nonsense. But we called it glicking. And that's when a guy raises his tongue up and squirts something out of the glands beneath the tongue. And it's a clear saliva type substance that used to hit me in the back of the neck when I was sitting in class. And it's something I didn't experience in high school, but I experienced it in junior high.

1:10:10 Esai Morales It's a junior high phenomenon.

1:10:11 Adam Esai did that, and so did Drew. And apparently, engineer Anderson was hip to that. It's more of a dude thing. I don't think chicks do it. But the question is, is are they still doing it? Does anyone listening to this show experience this glicking or gleeking phenomenon?

1:10:25 Drew Or is that just a brief twist of history?

1:10:27 Adam Did you have it in junior high? We're all talking about junior high here, not high school.

1:10:32 Esai Morales Even if people are 60 or 70 years old, we'd like to know if it was around in the good old days.

1:10:37 Adam Yeah, we're trying to figure out if it feels like something that just happened to us in the years that we went to junior high. But did it happen to kids today or people before us? If you got a thought on that, call us up. Heather?

1:10:50 Caller Yes. Yes.

1:10:52 Adam Thirty-eight, triple E?

1:10:53 Caller Certainly.

1:10:54 Adam Good times.

1:10:55 Drew Triple E.

1:10:57 Esai Morales What's the problem?

1:10:59 Caller Well, I'm having a lot of back problems here lately. I was just wondering, is there any risk involved in a breast reduction?

1:11:07 Drew Well, of course, it's a surgery. So there's a risk of anesthesia, risk of bleeding, risk of infection. It's not risk-free, risk of scarring.

1:11:14 Adam How big is the rest of you?

1:11:16 Caller I'm kind of average. I'm not big. I'm 140 pounds. I'm really not evenly distributed with these big boobs.

1:11:25 Adam Do you know Clem, who called for Marilyn earlier?

1:11:29 Drew No.

1:11:30 Adam I see.

1:11:30 Caller No, I missed it.

1:11:31 Adam Okay. Yeah, so you're now triple E, really?

1:11:35 Drew Yes. Didn't we go through a whole procedure trying to figure out the different sizes?

1:11:40 Adam Yeah.

1:11:40 Drew And the tripling up ended after D, then we didn't?

1:11:44 Adam I don't totally recall it. Does your bra really say triple E on it?

1:11:48 Esai Morales That's the shoe size.

1:11:50 Adam Maybe it was made in triple E, which is in North Africa.

1:11:54 Esai Morales You have to get it made. What's the size?

1:11:57 Caller I'll order them.

1:11:58 Esai Morales What's the size in general?

1:12:00 Caller I just know it's triple E. That's what they...

1:12:02 Adam I see.

1:12:02 Esai Morales It's what triple E again? I forgot the number.

1:12:04 Caller 38.

1:12:05 Adam And you send away for them?

1:12:09 Caller Yeah.

1:12:09 Adam I see. Yeah, well, that's a lot of brass. But you are a little bit overweight?

1:12:15 Caller Yeah, a little bit.

1:12:17 Adam Right. But still, if you lost that 10 or 15 pounds, so you go down to double E. Big deal.

1:12:23 Drew Well, I don't know.

1:12:24 Adam Well, it couldn't hurt.

1:12:26 Esai Morales Have you been lean before without as much breast or what?

1:12:30 Caller Well, I was smaller. Here in the last, I want to say the last two, three years, I've gotten bigger, but my breast has gotten a lot bigger here.

1:12:40 Adam Yeah. Well, that...

1:12:41 Caller Just in the latter part, though, I mean, it's not while I was... You know, when I was younger, they were like, you know, they were normal. And I mean, you know, I had around 1920 and they started getting bigger.

1:12:50 Adam Okay. So how about this for a deal? Why don't you slim down a little bit, do your diet, do your exercise, give it eight months or a year, and then you get your breast reduction if you need it at that point.

1:13:05 Caller So lose some weight and see what happens.

1:13:07 Adam Yeah, I mean, it couldn't hurt either way, right?

1:13:08 Drew I know that you were smaller at a lower weight. It might be an easier way to manage it.

1:13:12 Adam Well, and also, also, who would want to get a breast reduction? I mean, I know this happens a lot and I know they do it a lot. I know. No, I'm cool with that. Yeah, Punky Brewster got it. But what I mean is, if you're a woman who is X amount of pounds overweight, and you get a breast reduction, well, some of what they're taking out is stuff that would be gone if you lost that weight, correct?

1:13:38 Drew That's right.

1:13:39 Adam And then you still got the big ass, and now the boobs are gone. I mean, that's what Drew told me medically. I'm no doctor. The point is, is like anything, and I'm trying to think of an example, and I can't, if you, let's get down to, so there's nothing extra on you, and then anything they take off is what they should take off, not the extra, because women complain that the boobs go up and down with weight constantly, and a lot of them say that's the first thing that goes when they lose the weight. I think it's their brain, but a lot of them say it's the boobs, unfortunately. Kimberly?

1:14:13 Caller Yes.

1:14:14 Adam You're 21?

1:14:15 Caller Yes. Long time listener, second time caller.

1:14:17 Adam Great.

1:14:18 Caller And I like you a lot, even though last time I called you said you didn't like me. Whatever.

1:14:22 Adam I was probably just being serious.

1:14:25 Caller Yeah, probably being serious.

1:14:26 Caller Okay, I'd like to make a point that when you argue abortion, when somebody says it's ethically, morally wrong, actually, there are schools of philosophical thought that nothing actually is morally or ethically wrong. It's only, intrinsically, it's only what we say it is.

1:14:47 Drew Well, but that's moral relativism, where right and wrong doesn't exist, that it's all utilitarian principles.

1:14:53 Adam Yeah, I mean, I agree. We need a point to sort of jump off on. I mean, if we want to start getting into that, well, how is murder wrong? It's only wrong by your definition, your moral definition, or some of that kind of stuff. We have to have it so it doesn't undermine one individual's right and Yeah, but the point is, if you think this way, eventually you just spin off into space, there's no arguing anymore, because eventually the person you're talking to isn't there.

1:15:19 Drew This is John Stuart Mills, right? That's who you're talking about?

1:15:22 Caller Pardon?

1:15:23 Drew John Stuart Mills, the primary philosopher that espoused this, and this is, you know, it's the way some people believe, but I think most people believe that there are things such things as right and wrong and that with carefully applied thought we can have access to those things.

1:15:39 Caller But I didn't think there was any, I was taking an ethics class, I actually just started it, and I actually didn't think there was a good response to Plato in the Republic saying, why should we lead a just life?

1:15:55 Adam Well, okay, well the reason you should lead a just life, and I don't want to spin too far off into this either, that wasn't my main point, you don't want anyone to kill you, and you want those same rules to apply to society, as they do to you.

1:16:09 Drew There's another guy named Lawrence Colberg that talks about moral development in the human being, he studied it as an abstract developmental process that goes along with cognitive and emotional development, and then most people stop right at the level that Adam is talking about, which is basically a golden, hang on, which is basically the golden rule, which is do unto others. But there are documentations of people who have access to higher moral principles, something that are called apodictic truths, truths that must be so and cannot be otherwise, and then live their lives by those truths, regardless of the circumstances of the society in which they live, and theoretically that's a higher ethical moral ground to aspire to. So I think most of us would say that there is some principled life that we could all try to aspire to, that's above and beyond the social contract and the golden rule.

1:16:58 Adam The world is your oyster. I mean, because that's all the world is. I know I was drunk when I said that. What's up?

1:17:05 Caller I also wanted to say that when somebody is religious and they argue against abortion, well, you should say, well, it's okay, it is a sin, but the other sins, because they aren't illegal, like coveting thy neighbor's stuff and cheating on your wife, they aren't illegal.

1:17:23 Adam Oh, they put stuff in the Bible?

1:17:25 Caller Yes, they put that.

1:17:27 Caller They aren't illegal.

1:17:27 Drew They are in the neighbor's ass, I believe is how it is.

1:17:29 Adam They aren't illegal.

1:17:31 Drew Coveting the neighbor's ass.

1:17:34 Caller You have to prove it undermines our social contract to say that it should be illegal. Is she Republican?

1:17:39 Drew She is manic.

1:17:40 Adam Kimberly, where are you coming down on this side? You want the kids to be vacuumed out or not?

1:17:47 Caller I want them to argue it in a...

1:17:49 Caller Well, actually, I personally don't care.

1:17:52 Adam Thank you.

1:17:54 Caller Thanks for calling.

1:17:55 Adam Have another B-Load and watch them Alley McBeal and just call it a life, would you? I'll tell you, there's nothing worse than a person with their first philosophy class or ethics class. I had a friend, Carl, who went to see Son over here in Northridge. This guy was a great guy and he was a regular guy and everything was fine, just sort of a North Hollywood guy, he used to love to hang out with him. Then he took his first philosophy class and it was like an ethics class. He would start arguing stuff with me and I'd start arguing back and then he would eventually come around and take my point and then I would start arguing his point and at a certain point I'd go, what the hell are we doing? And he would just keep going in circles and circles and circles.

1:18:37 Esai Morales That's what they refer to as a circle jerk.

1:18:38 Adam Right. And eventually I'd just go nuts on him and go, look, let's get some beer, let's go to the park.

1:18:43 Drew Let's get the boxing ring.

1:18:44 Adam Let's relax.

1:18:44 Caller Let's do a real circle jerk.

1:18:46 Adam Yeah, it's very, little knowledge is a dangerous thing. Max?

1:18:50 Esai Morales But at least he tries.

1:18:50 Caller Yeah. First of all, I just want to say, Adam, you kick ass.

1:18:53 Adam Yeah, thank you.

1:18:54 Caller And you're very funny. I watch the O'Lan Show every week because it's fun. I watch it every night.

1:19:00 Adam Thank you.

1:19:01 Caller I'm fourteen. I'm a freshman in high school right now.

1:19:04 Caller I was junior high last year.

1:19:06 Caller Gleeking happened every day.

1:19:08 Adam Oh really?

1:19:08 Caller All day long.

1:19:09 Adam Just as popular as it was back when, huh?

1:19:12 Esai Morales What do you think the societal origins of gleeking is? Hmm?

1:19:18 Caller Thank you.

1:19:19 Esai Morales That was a good answer.

1:19:20 Adam Max, were you being gleeked upon?

1:19:23 Caller Yes. I could not figure out how to do it myself.

1:19:25 Adam I couldn't do it either. Only the A-holes could figure out how to do that. And they would do it on the back of my neck when they sat behind me in class.

1:19:32 Caller I did it on my face too.

1:19:33 Drew Oh.

1:19:34 Adam Yeah. It's not a great thing.

1:19:36 Drew Again, people understand this is squirting saliva out of the gland under your tongue.

1:19:40 Adam Right.

1:19:41 Drew Into the air and onto your opponent.

1:19:43 Adam And it's a fine mist that you can't often feel for a while if it's going on your jacket or on your hair until it kind of gets through to you.

1:19:51 Drew A little bit of the squirt gun effect.

1:19:53 Adam Well, no, because it's a mister. It has a mist effect. But the thing about it is you'll know it when you see the guy's jaw moving in a weird way and his mouth open as if he's yawning and his tongue rolled up. All right, Max. So it's still going on, right?

1:20:10 Drew Thanks, Max.

1:20:11 Adam Thanks. I'm glad it's still around. David?

1:20:15 Caller Yeah.

1:20:16 Adam You got a question?

1:20:17 Caller Yeah. Hey, no, I just wanted to make a comment. Okay, Dr. Drew, Adam, you guys, you guys are like the smartest guys ever. You guys are so fun. Both you guys are hilarious. I see you guys all the time. You guys are great. Thanks. And Esai Morales, how you doing, man?

1:20:31 Esai Morales What's up, David? Not much.

1:20:33 Caller Hey, you were great in Mi Familia, but I'm just called to tell you that the movie that just stood out for me since I was like five years old is La Bamba.

1:20:41 Esai Morales Oh, my God.

1:20:42 Caller Like the relationship you and Lou Dunn and Phillips had in that movie, it just totally like made me and my brothers relationship like great. I mean, even though it's kind of, you know, weird. You know, he was an alky and stuff and whatever. But I'm saying like the positive aspects. I mean, we'd memorize lines from the movie.

1:20:57 Adam Well, remember the good.

1:20:58 Caller Listen, it was great.

1:21:00 Esai Morales It's an honor for me, you know, who does this kind of stuff, you know, acting. And a lot of times acting is not very fulfilling. But it's very fulfilling to know that you can actually, you know, the stuff you do that you actually get paid for, that you love doing anyway, has a positive impact on people.

1:21:17 Caller It did. It did.

1:21:19 Adam I saw the older Richie Valens' brother, accepting Mario when he was being inducted into the Hall of Fame just recently. I mean, Richie Valens was. A couple of things. First off, Mario is a serious biker dude still in his 50s. And Richie Valens, you see, you know, you hear his records, you see the pictures of him and stuff. The guy was 16.

1:21:41 Esai Morales Oh, wow. 16 and 17. Wow.

1:21:43 Adam You know what I mean? I mean, you think about Richie Valens. The guy looked like he was 28.

1:21:48 Drew Yeah, he looked like a man.

1:21:49 Adam He looked like a man. And you'd assume you'd just assume while the guy had some hits, seemed like he'd been around a little while. I don't know what he was. He was 24, 25.

1:21:58 Esai Morales The dude was 17 when he died.

1:22:00 Caller I mean, just because of that age gap, because me and my brother are seven years apart. And you know how you just beat up on a little brother type of relationship. It's like I was Richie and my brother was Bob.

1:22:08 Esai Morales Right.

1:22:09 Caller It was just so great.

1:22:10 Adam You're Richie without the talent.

1:22:12 Caller Well, yeah, of course.

1:22:12 Esai Morales Oh, you're so mad.

1:22:15 Caller I can't compare to Richie Valens now.

1:22:17 Esai Morales Listen, man, it's a great thing that you guys were able to grow closer and respect our suffering in the movie turned into your benefit. Yeah, yeah.

1:22:28 Caller All good. Nothing bad or nothing.

1:22:30 Esai Morales Hey, man. Good looking out in the Bay Area.

1:22:33 Caller What's up?

1:22:33 Esai Morales You're from the Bay Area?

1:22:34 Caller Yeah, San Francisco, California, man.

1:22:37 Esai Morales All righty, man. I got a lot of friends up there. Just want to shout out to them.

1:22:39 Caller Yeah, just wanted to say, I just want to call and tell you that, man. You're the greatest, man.

1:22:43 Esai Morales Right back at you. Thank you, David.

1:22:45 Adam Take care, David. Thanks for the call. All right. See you. All righty. Man, I just think, you know, I mean, when La Bamba came out and and let's see, what am I thinking of? Donna and all. He was 16 when that stuff came out, right?

1:23:00 Caller Yeah. He was 16 when he wrote it.

1:23:02 Adam Jesus. You ever see pictures of him?

1:23:03 Drew 30.

1:23:04 Adam Yeah, easily.

1:23:05 Esai Morales He looked like a little bull. Yeah.

1:23:07 Adam All right. We will take ourselves a little break. We'll be back for more questions after this. Hey, yeah, it's my new riff. Yeah. Drew, on to the air drums, if you please. Esai Morales is our guest tonight. NYPD Blue, Tuesday nights, 10 o'clock, ABC, big night tomorrow night.

1:23:58 Esai Morales Take a peek. If you like it, let me know.

1:24:01 Adam I think they have.

1:24:02 Esai Morales If you don't, they will.

1:24:04 Adam Aaron?

1:24:05 Caller Yeah.

1:24:06 Adam You're 34. What's up?

1:24:08 Caller My girlfriend's going to have to have her uterus removed because of fibroids. And I don't know what fibroids are and what...

1:24:15 Drew Fibroids are just muscular growths or abnormal growth of the muscle inside the wall of the uterus.

1:24:22 Caller Yeah, because she had one rupture last year.

1:24:25 Drew No. Well, you can't. You can sort of bleed into them and things. But you're sure she didn't have an ovarian cyst rupture last year?

1:24:32 Caller That's what they said it was. Then now they said her uterus was the size of a melon.

1:24:37 Drew She had a bunch of kids?

1:24:38 Caller No.

1:24:39 Esai Morales That happens when you don't have kids.

1:24:40 Caller No, she had no kids.

1:24:41 Drew No kids.

1:24:42 Esai Morales That's my cousin.

1:24:44 Caller I was just wondering, as soon as she's going to be sterile after she has it removed?

1:24:48 Drew Well, again, she won't be able to bear children herself, but if they leave her ovaries and she's not menopausal, it's possible they could retrieve the ovaries. Extract the eggs. Extract the eggs, yeah.

1:24:59 Caller But what will be the testes? I mean, will her hormones change or?

1:25:03 Drew No, nothing.

1:25:04 Caller Nothing will change?

1:25:05 Adam Hey, has anyone done a parts count on women versus men? Seems like women got more parts. You know? I mean, just in that area alone, there's like, you know, 472 parts where men have more.

1:25:15 Esai Morales Well, excuse me, they got to carry on if you know what I mean.

1:25:18 Adam Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I mean, do women got more parts than men? Anyone do a parts count?

1:25:23 Drew The testes are a pretty complex little instrument.

1:25:25 Esai Morales There's three parts they don't have.

1:25:26 Adam Yeah, but I count that as one.

1:25:27 Esai Morales Two of the testes and one...

1:25:29 Adam Yeah, all right.

1:25:29 Esai Morales Unless you can say that a very long...

1:25:31 Drew We want to get the pictures.

1:25:31 Adam I'll give you the sack. No, I just want a parts count.

1:25:35 Drew Well, I think, you know, we...

1:25:36 Adam I don't know how you have to define a part.

1:25:39 Drew Instead of a series of glands like skeins and bartholins, we got one prostate.

1:25:43 Adam There you go.

1:25:43 Drew Okay, so we condense ours down to one.

1:25:45 Adam Right.

1:25:47 Drew They get over the testes.

1:25:47 Adam Is this why women pack? They got to take three suitcases for a weekend? Is this why they need so much stuff? We need that little Pan Am bag and we're good?

1:25:56 Drew For their parts.

1:25:58 Adam What I could just mean is maybe they have a sort of predisposition for parts.

1:26:02 Esai Morales I think parts and servicing.

1:26:03 Adam Yeah, they're very complicated. I've said it, women are really like a Steinway piano and we're just like a kettle drum.

1:26:12 Drew We were kind of talking about this at the beginning of the show about the difference between men and women and how men are sort of in awe of women because of mom and because of them not being women. I mean women understand each other because they share their genetic heritage.

1:26:27 Adam I'm saying I want a parts count.

1:26:28 Drew But some people theorize that that part of women you're talking about sort of freaks men out.

1:26:33 Adam The parts part?

1:26:34 Drew The parts part. Like it's some mysterious swamp.

1:26:37 Esai Morales Well I remember when I was a little kid I always thought of girls as being complicated down there. And the concept of their complications made them ikky when I was a little boy. I was like oh there's stuff going on there that I don't know about.

1:26:51 Drew And people theorize that it's sort of a mis- it's nature and it's mysterious and it's sort of swamp like and it's going to swallow us up.

1:26:57 Adam Well it is true. You know like you remember you talk to now you're so freaked out about that stuff as a guy.

1:27:05 Drew What's that?

1:27:05 Adam You talk just that downstairs stuff. You'll talk to one of your friends and you'll go hey how you doing? How's your mom doing? And she'll go oh she's got to have a little minor surgery and you'll go oh okay that's fine that's fine. That's enough. I've heard enough. You know because it's always something going on down there.

1:27:23 Drew Yeah. Lower your head. Yeah okay.

1:27:28 Adam That's still like a parts count. That's all I'm saying. Joe? We don't have a swamp sound effect.

1:27:36 Esai Morales That's wrong.

1:27:37 Adam What's a swamp sound like? Mosquitoes, crickets, frogs.

1:27:40 Drew There you go.

1:27:41 Adam No, you're doing jungle. Joe?

1:27:44 Caller Yeah.

1:27:45 Adam You're 18.

1:27:45 Caller Yeah. Recently, the past eight months, I've been trying, I can't concentrate anymore. I'll be talking to someone, I'll be reading, and I'll be thinking about something else. It frustrates me so much. I'll just get so angry at myself and I'll just start hitting myself. I'll do things that I don't know what I do. My friends will be like, well, you did this yesterday and you did that.

1:28:08 Drew Like what?

1:28:09 Caller I told this girl goodbye one time, but I thought I said goodbye. Someone told me that I was telling her I loved her. And I was like, I'm telling her I love her. And then, it's really hard to explain, I don't really know how to explain it, but I can't concentrate when I read a book about something else. I'll read it about 20 times and then I'll finally understand it.

1:28:28 Drew Are you doing drugs and alcohol?

1:28:30 Caller Yeah.

1:28:30 Drew What drugs are you doing?

1:28:33 Esai Morales It's like bong hits, it sounds like.

1:28:35 Adam Yeah.

1:28:36 Drew Well, I'm thinking speed.

1:28:37 Adam What drugs?

1:28:38 Drew Speed?

1:28:39 Caller Yeah.

1:28:40 Drew Yeah. This is what speed does to you. It makes you can't concentrate. Pretty soon, you're going to start getting paranoid.

1:28:45 Caller Yeah, I do get paranoid a lot.

1:28:47 Drew Yeah, you're going to believe people close to you, friends, family, people at school are thinking about you, talking about you, passing notes about you, and pretty soon, you're going to think they're starting to want to hurt you.

1:28:55 Esai Morales This phone call is tapped.

1:28:57 Drew No. And this is the biological effect of speed. Strangely, cocaine, when people get paranoid from cocaine, it's much more intense, and it's always a preoccupation about uniformed officers.

1:29:08 Caller Yeah, the past few months, I did cocaine heavily.

1:29:10 Drew Well, there you go. So this is all dry. And what my speed addict patients talk about when they're using the speed, it's like going through life with a strobe light going on and off. And so you have blank out, and these things that you do are very common when you're on speed.

1:29:23 Adam All right, so Joe, how about you stop doing the speed?

1:29:26 Drew How about you get treated for it because you ain't going to stop?

1:29:28 Caller How would I go to like?

1:29:30 Drew I would call, do you have a doctor? No. Are there any local hospitals? Yeah. Call Los Encinas. 626-356-2671.

1:29:41 Adam How is he going to write that down with the strobe going on?

1:29:43 Esai Morales Los Encinas.

1:29:45 Drew 3-5-6-2671. All right.

1:29:50 All right, thanks, man.

1:29:51 Adam All right, call him, would you?

1:29:52 Yeah, I will.

1:29:53 Adam And listen, everybody with the speed, you know, you don't hear me preach too much about the booze or the weed or the coke or the pills.

1:30:01 Drew You don't like the speed.

1:30:02 Adam You're biased. Adam, you're prejudiced. Listen, I know speed ruins you. You just can't do it. You just can't do it. You can't do it recreationally. You can't just have a little fun on a weekend with it. You can't just do a little tootsie when you come home or whatever. You just can't. Hey, if some guy tells me he wants to have some red wine or some weed when he comes home from work, I've done one. That's fine. Speed, you get violent, you get strung out, and the world starts coming unraveled.

1:30:27 Esai Morales You end up on cops, basically.

1:30:29 Adam You do. Yes. You're in your underpants. You're being tackled on your lawn. That's what happens. You end up being tackled by guys in uniforms who have to wrestle you down. High-speed chases. Right. Sarah?

1:30:41 Yes.

1:30:42 Adam You're 23. What's up?

1:30:43 Caller Hi. I have to tell Esai that he is such a gorgeous man.

1:30:49 Drew Adam was just saying that to him.

1:30:52 Caller He's so beautiful. I've never watched NYPD Blue, but I'm going to have to start watching it now. Tomorrow night. And I have a question, Dr. Drew. A lot of my friends tell me that when I have gas, I don't let it out if I'm around people.

1:31:07 Drew That's fine.

1:31:07 Caller I can't bear it.

1:31:08 Drew That's good.

1:31:09 Esai Morales We can't either.

1:31:11 Caller I've heard that it can mess up your colon by holding it in.

1:31:15 Drew How? What does it do?

1:31:16 Esai Morales Pressure.

1:31:17 Caller I don't know. People have just told me that and I want to know if there was any truth to that at all.

1:31:21 Adam Drew, but what about the sort of universal truth of holding back or holding in anything that your body wants to push out? Be it a splint or a gas or a sneeze.

1:31:31 Drew Anytime you get an urge to poo, you just let it out?

1:31:33 Adam Absolutely.

1:31:33 Drew No matter where you are, what you're doing? Same deal.

1:31:36 Esai Morales He's talking a lot of poo now.

1:31:38 Adam That's true. All right. Touche. That's a good point.

1:31:41 Drew It will come out in its own time. It will come out larger next time.

1:31:45 Adam Well, let me ask you, because this is a fear of mine, that if I don't go into the writer's office over at the Man Show, the last one on those guys, that it'll go away and I'll never see it again. Each one of my farts is a child to me. That's my children.

1:31:59 Drew I know you're birthing.

1:32:01 Adam I don't have children myself, but these are my babies. I don't want any of them to get away. They're all important to me. So Drew, will it dissipate? Will I absorb it or will the next one be bigger?

1:32:12 Drew It could, but generally the next one will be bigger.

1:32:22 Esai Morales Do you ever get cramps in your stomach?

1:32:25 Caller No, I've never gotten cramps, but I've always been able to hold it in pretty good, but I'm worried that as I get older...

1:32:31 Drew You'll be fine. As you get older, you won't be able to hold it in. Right.

1:32:34 You know what it is?

1:32:35 Esai Morales You've got to get out of the car and check that flat tire every once in a while.

1:32:39 Adam That's right.

1:32:40 Esai Morales Man, I put some in the trunk.

1:32:41 Drew Good time.

1:32:42 Esai Morales Yeah. When you save them up for a long time, I guess the ones you do take twice as long.

1:32:47 Caller But what about when people start having anal sex? Isn't it harder to hold it in then?

1:32:51 Drew We would imagine so. Yeah.

1:32:53 Adam Yeah. When some guys basically use your ass as a butter churn, stuff's going to come out.

1:32:59 Esai Morales Take a quail.

1:33:01 Drew All right.

1:33:01 Adam We'll take a break.

1:33:02 Esai Morales Bye.

1:33:04 Caller Loveline. Loveline. We'll be right back.

1:33:40 Adam All right, well, there you go. Esai Morales, everyone. Thanks for a good night.

1:33:46 Esai Morales Thank you, guys. Thanks for giving such great advice, plugging our show, and being such a funny dude.

1:33:53 Adam NYPD Blue, everybody. Tuesday nights, tomorrow night. 10 o'clock, ABC. Come back anytime.

1:34:00 Esai Morales Big shout out to Jonas.

1:34:02 Adam We do appreciate you coming in. So until next time, it's Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. The world is your oyster. I mean, because that's all the world is.

1:34:13 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Monday, April 9, 2001