Episode 1000754887011

4:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

4:07 Voiceover Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, coast to coast.

4:14 Adam It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. Dr. Drew, over there, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number, forget about that fax number. We never see a fax here. Do we? Have you?

4:25 Drew No, no. But Adam, I was feeling-

4:27 Adam Oh, hold on, Anderson says no paper in the fax machine.

4:30 Drew Oh, shocking, shocking.

4:32 Adam They run such a tight ship at this dump known as Westwood One. Please, I've said this a few times, if anybody has any money to invest, invest it in Westwood One. It is all profit, every penny. Nothing goes back into equipment, nothing goes into supplies, and certainly not into talent, not vending machines, not plastic spoons. There's no goddamn paper cups in this place. It is an out and out dump. This place looks like a ski chalet that was used in a porn film in 1974. It really is, and it has not changed a bit. I really hope the guy who worked on this is listening, sir, you are a hack. There is some of the worst carpentry I've ever seen in my life in this studio and on these facilities, and I, as an ex-carpenter, am offended each and every time I enter this building.

5:23 Drew I would like to complain that I have to endure your complaining every night. Every time we walk to the bathroom, we have to look at the door jams.

5:31 Adam See, they should have used base shoe there. They used, they used court around, and they should have used base shoe.

5:36 Drew Every night. And then what follows is pure hack, pure hack.

5:40 Adam Pure hack-itude. This entire place was done by a one-armed, blind, drunk carpenter. I mean, really some of the worst carpenter I've ever seen in my life. And you know what I would like to do? Here's what I'd like to do once they throw me off the air for talking about everything but love on Loveline. I would like to give guided tours of Westwood One and explain to young school children so they don't take bad turns from a carpentry standpoint. Here's where this guy went wrong in every facet of this building. I will start in the lobby. I'll finish in the gentleman's head and it will be a 16-hour tour. We'll go by the vending machine that has nothing in it except for worm-filled trail mix. And that's well to conclude. I think at the worm-filled trail mix vending machine.

6:24 Drew It's moth-filled. Sorry, true, it's a larva. And could you, given that that's going to be your future career, could you refrain from giving me that tour every night?

6:32 Adam Every night, Drew. I got to warm up on somebody. Nicole Sullivan is our guest tonight. She's in her sixth season from MADtv. This show, they said, wouldn't last. Actually they being the cast, not anybody. Not any of the executives or anything. Just the actual cast said it wouldn't last. And maybe...

6:52 Nicole Sullivan We had the worst attitude in Hollywood the first couple of years.

6:57 Adam You know, most of the time people come on this show and they're sort of stoic, you know. They're like, you go like, how's it look for next year? They go, they take a beat, they look at each other and they go, it looks good, looks good, looks good. It looks good, it looks good. You guys are like, show's going. It's a sinking ship, we're wrecked, we got to get off this one. I'm going to...

7:20 Drew For the last two years, I remember, when was I? I was doing some pilot or something. We're going to the MADtv set, we're going to watch their last show. We're going to watch the last show.

7:29 Nicole Sullivan The last episode.

7:29 Drew Yeah, the last episode. That's been three years in a row, you've had the last episode.

7:33 Nicole Sullivan And I've personally said goodbye approximately 712 times. Like, that's it guys, I'm moving on. I've got to move on.

7:40 Adam I heard it got picked up for like two or three years now.

7:43 Nicole Sullivan Now we're on the air like 2005.

7:45 Drew Now you have to leave.

7:46 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. I did too, because now that they're definitely saying I have to go.

7:50 Adam Yeah. And is this the longest extension you guys have gotten?

7:55 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, like they started picking up shows like two years at a time. And then, but before the two years ran out, they did like two more. So it's, yeah, this is definitely the longest considering that we were like minute by minute for the first few years.

8:05 Adam I'm trying to think of what the longest running beside SNL sketch comedy show around has been. And you know, people remember SCTV and shows like that. But I think like SCTV was like three years or something. Yeah, if that, I think, yeah, maybe are kids in the hall a couple of years or maybe a few more in Canada.

8:24 Drew And with with all this, the longest one other than SNL, definitely with all kinds of the remaining cast, you think it's going to make it without Nicole?

8:31 Adam She going somewhere?

8:32 She was back here.

8:33 Adam Oh, I see. All right. Drew, I'm tired tonight. Don't screw with me.

8:37 All right.

8:38 Adam So anyway, Saturday night's 1130. 11. Oh, well, there it is.

8:45 Right there.

8:46 Adam Drew, how many times would you say the wrong time has been given to me in the course of my short television radio career?

8:56 Drew What I don't understand, it's certainly the most of the time.

8:58 Adam No, it's not most of the time.

9:00 Drew It feels like most of the time. I don't know why you won't.

9:02 Adam No, it doesn't. It's not. It's not. I don't get the wrong. I don't get the wrong time delivered to me.

9:07 Drew It's either the wrong time of the wrong network or the wrong night. It's one of those three.

9:13 Adam No, that Ann is yelling in my ear and saying it's not true, and it is not true. That is not most of the time. It's about 40% of the time. That is definitely not the overwhelming majority of the time.

9:24 Drew It's not Ann's fault, by the way.

9:26 Adam No, no, no. It comes in the publicist packages. No, no, no.

9:29 Yeah.

9:32 Adam Whatever. Ann, for like a heartbeat, was like, Boy, Ann was really defending me. Then about minute number 10 of the no, I think she flew me the bird. No, I usually get... This was something that used to happen on MTV quite constantly.

9:44 Drew Most of the time, right?

9:46 Adam Quite a bit. Yeah.

9:47 Nicole Sullivan That's more fun, too, than you can see all the faces as the actors. No, it's actually the WB.

9:54 Adam And I know it's 11 o'clock because I am home Saturday nights at 11 o'clock Why are you home Saturday nights? I sit home every goddamn chance I get. That is my life. And you know what it is? Because I drag my sorry, hairy ass out of my house to do this show every night. I'll be damned if I'm going to be somewhere between the hours of 10 and midnight on the nights I don't have to be here. It's a weird thing. And Drew, I don't know if you have that. And I don't know if that's what you have. Or Anderson, if that's your thing. But I will sit home on a Friday night at like 10 15 and look at the clock and laugh.

10:34 Look who's home.

10:35 Adam What am I going to do?

10:36 Nicole Sullivan How many hours of sleep do you get a night usually?

10:39 Adam Well last night was tough because I had to get up at 630 this morning and shoot some nonsense. But I usually do like seven and a half. I'm fine. I take my little 20 minute naps. I just I just got a tough night last night. That's all. Dan?

10:53 Hello?

10:54 Adam You're 19. What's up?

10:57 Caller Hey, I've heard of girls soaking tampons in liquor and then putting them in and I guess they get drunk that way.

11:04 Drew Good times.

11:05 Yeah.

11:06 Caller Yeah. I was wondering if that was safe.

11:08 Drew Well, safe.

11:10 Adam What I do is I'll soak a tampon in liquor and then just wring it out in a shot glass. I don't want to suck on the thing. No, no, I wring it. Please, Drew.

11:21 Drew I don't know how you get a soggy tampon in, but be that as it may.

11:25 Adam Well, couldn't you if you soak the applicator and the tampon itself. Do tampons now, they all have applicators?

11:32 Drew No.

11:33 Nicole Sullivan They don't all, but most do.

11:35 Drew OB, they're really popular ones now, don't even have that.

11:37 Nicole Sullivan I don't know what those people are thinking. What's the extra inch of space in their purse that they can't afford to give, that they're going to stick their fingers up there instead of just a nice little applicator?

11:47 Caller Well, I guess they do it so that they can pass the breathalyzer test.

11:53 Drew No, no, that wouldn't affect it at all.

11:56 Adam Well, because that measures blood alcohol content.

11:59 Drew Yeah, blood alcohol level, exactly. And I do, I've heard of people putting things in their tocus to get alcohol in their blood, but I've never heard of people putting stuff in their vagina, and again, they could be very irritating, it would definitely cause vaginitis and inflammation and infections of various types, so not a good idea.

12:16 Adam All right, Dan, a very thought provoking question though, Dan. All right, thanks. All right, have fun in finishing school, okay? Take care of yourself there, Dan. Yeah, I mean, unless you have something wrong with your mouth, I'd say don't put anything up yet.

12:32 Nicole Sullivan It should be easier to do a shot, really.

12:34 Adam I would think, yeah.

12:36 Jacob? Hello?

12:38 Adam Year 14?

12:39 Oh man, I've got problems with my balls.

12:41 Adam Good, good times.

12:43 Oh, yes. They stink.

12:45 Adam They stink?

12:46 Caller They stink, man.

12:48 Adam I almost set my balls on fire today. Today? I don't mean... You're lighting a fire? How dare you try to insult me in front of our guest?

12:57 Drew I was going to say, he seems very touchy today, Nicole. He seems to want to impress you.

13:00 Adam Because I know Nicole...

13:01 Drew Normally, he'd be actually lighting the fire.

13:02 Adam Nicole is smitten with me. She can't help that.

13:06 Nicole Sullivan I don't want to hear anything about a congratulation from this man.

13:09 Adam Yeah, she doesn't want my...

13:10 Drew Don't worry, it's loaded with talc down there. There's actually paper mache forming on it. He makes a mold of his penis every night.

13:17 Adam I swear to you that I dumped... I was doing a little experimenting with gold bond powder, which has a real sort of mentholatum kind of vibe to it. And you're nuts. You don't know this, Nicole, but you could learn this right now. Your nuts are like a big sea sponge. They soak up the stuff around them.

13:38 Drew Meaning one's nuts.

13:39 Adam One's nuts. One's nuts. I'm telling you this. If I dip my hand in gasoline and rub it on my thigh, I won't feel any sensation on my thigh. Right. If I dip my hand in gasoline and rub it on my nuts, I will feel burning.

13:53 Nicole Sullivan Is it true that it is more porous? It's just more sensitive?

13:57 Adam Both. Wow. But there's something... There's a different sensation to it because you can rub that gasoline underneath your armpit. It's not bad. That's sensitive skin or some place... No, no.

14:08 Drew This is a different kind of skin...

14:09 Adam .sensitive. This thing will burn. It feels as if it's absorbing the gasoline. And this gold bond I dumped down, I jumped like half a tub down my shorts today. And then I did some... I was doing some man show a bit with a prosthetic penis that was loaded with water that sprung a leak and it exploded in my pants and it mixed with the gold bond and my nuts gone on fire. It was very painful, very painful.

14:33 Drew Just if I just put my fingers in my ear and watch those hand movements he just went through it would have been bizarre enough. Yeah. Forget what you actually said about having a water filled penis that sprung a leak.

14:42 Nicole Sullivan It was very entertaining. Yeah.

14:45 Adam Thank you. Jacob?

14:46 Yes.

14:46 Adam So your nuts are where?

14:48 Drew They stink.

14:49 They're next to my asshole.

14:52 Adam Yes. I see.

14:54 All right.

14:54 Adam Do you think, should we talk to him?

14:57 Caller You all right with him?

14:58 Adam How about dumping some talc down there?

15:00 Drew How about?

15:02 Adam No. He doesn't want advice?

15:04 Drew I mean, he's 14. He's just had puberty. He may not really understand how much hygiene needs have changed now that the hormones are flowing and there's very sort of funk being emitted. It may be about getting deodorant soaps and showering more frequently and maybe some talc and...

15:20 Adam Is deodorant soap doing anything?

15:21 Drew Cotton, shirt cotton shorts. Yeah, it's helpful.

15:24 Adam Really?

15:24 Drew Yeah, useful.

15:25 Adam Really?

15:26 Drew It's stinkier. Different kind of stink.

15:28 Nicole Sullivan Maybe it's his butt too, you know. So, you could mistake it one for the other.

15:32 Adam I don't know. To me, I can tell. I mean, that's a different scent. You know, right?

15:38 Nicole Sullivan I know the one. I don't know the other so well.

15:41 Adam You know the sack, not the back?

15:43 Drew No.

15:43 Nicole Sullivan I know the butt, but I wouldn't know the sack smell so well.

15:47 Drew The sack smells a very variable smell.

15:49 Adam So hold on. You're saying, you know, the butt, not the nut, but it's not the sack in the back.

15:54 Nicole Sullivan The sack, the sack, no, back, yes. Well, I have a back. I don't have a sack.

15:59 Adam Right, right. That's true. That's true.

16:01 Drew Back, butt, back, butt, yes.

16:02 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

16:03 Drew Nut, sack, no.

16:05 Adam Nut, sack, no.

16:05 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

16:05 Adam Okay. Interesting, interesting. Kate? Kate?

16:11 Yes.

16:11 Adam You're 21. What's up?

16:13 Caller Well, I'm a little nuts to begin with, so I know you're going to re-momb me. But my husband and I, about six months ago, started having like a three-way with one of our good friends, and it lasted about six months. And it was really just me with him, and my husband really didn't care. And then he-

16:33 Drew Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. So it was a male?

16:35 Caller Yeah, yeah. I questioned if my husband's bi.

16:38 Drew Was he doing stuff with the guy?

16:40 Caller No, no, but he kind of wanted to, but he wouldn't fully, full out admit it, you know?

16:45 Adam How do you know he wanted to if he wouldn't do anything?

16:48 Caller Well, like he wanted to both of them be in me at the same time.

16:52 Adam No.

16:52 Drew He what?

16:53 Adam He what?

16:53 Drew What, what, what, what?

16:54 Adam Both be in at the same time.

16:55 Caller Yeah, I wouldn't go for that.

16:57 Drew He wanted to do that.

16:58 Caller Yeah, yeah.

16:59 Drew That makes him bi?

17:01 Caller Well, he's done other things that's kind of-

17:03 Adam Oh, hold on a second. You're taking your penis and another guy's penis and pushing it through the same male slot.

17:11 Drew Oh, I thought that-

17:11 Adam Do you understand?

17:13 Caller I think she means the back and the crunch.

17:15 Drew This is the back and the butt together.

17:16 Adam I watch way too much porn. I have no idea what's-

17:19 Nicole Sullivan What's logistically possible.

17:21 Adam Anus and vagina, right? Yeah.

17:24 Yeah.

17:25 Adam Still borderline gay, but you do have that thin piece of skin in between the two. But I think you would probably- Couldn't you still feel them inside? You think you could?

17:35 Drew What is up with you, Kate, that you need that kind of intense arousal? Were you physically abused growing up?

17:40 Caller Well, my dad was very verbal abusive and beat up my brother, my sister, my mom.

17:44 Drew He never beat you up, though?

17:46 Caller No.

17:46 Caller Well, when I was older, but it was kind of, I didn't. So-

17:50 Drew Let me ask again. He never beat you up?

17:52 Caller Well, we fought together.

17:53 Drew He never beat you up?

17:54 Caller But he never truly beat me up.

17:55 Caller Yeah.

17:56 Drew So he never sent you to the hospital?

17:58 Caller No.

17:58 Drew But he beat the crap out of you.

18:00 Adam She said when they were older. She was old. How old?

18:03 Caller I was 16.

18:05 Adam So you were like freaked out and rebellious?

18:07 Caller Oh yeah. I was totally nuts.

18:08 I'm schizoaffective.

18:10 Caller Oh. Ouch. Yeah.

18:13 Adam Yeah. All right. Well, are you on medication?

18:15 Nicole Sullivan Is that a real word?

18:16 Drew Schizoaffective. It's a personality disorder, basically.

18:18 Nicole Sullivan What does it mean?

18:21 Drew It's close to schizophrenia, but it's with a prominent mood disturbance. But you don't sound schizoaffective.

18:28 Nicole Sullivan Schizoaffective with an attitude?

18:31 Drew It's not a real common one, and it's thought and mood disturbance.

18:37 Caller Well, the doctors can't decide whether I'm mad depressive or schizoaffective.

18:40 Drew You don't sound schizoaffective to me. You can't. Schizoaffective usually is very cold, very detached.

18:45 Adam Well, what medication are you on?

18:47 Caller Well, you want all of them?

18:48 Drew Depakote, Zyprexa, or asperidol?

18:51 Caller No, I'm on Seracuil, Trazodone, Tegertal, Wilbutrin, and Xanax.

18:59 Adam Okay, just tell us the ones you aren't on. We only got two hours show. All right, here's my thing. Don't breed.

19:08 Caller Okay.

19:08 You don't have any kids.

19:12 Nicole Sullivan She's got a great sense of humor.

19:14 Adam Please take this in the spirit in which it's intended, but why do all the goddamn nutjobs have the kids? Do you realize that's how you kill off a planet? That's the best way to do it. That's nature's way to just kill the planet, just have all the screwball, the schizo-effective folks just populate, and then everyone just kill each other.

19:33 Nicole Sullivan I want to go back to whether your husband's getting kind of interested. Do you, I mean, you said he does other stuff, like other things with guys that you sort of heard or mentioned he was drunk or something like that?

19:43 Caller Well, he's just had, he's very feminine, like unbelievably feminine, and he kind of likes guys, but...

19:51 Adam Well, a feminine doesn't mean you're gay. I mean, look at Richard Simmons. He... He's gay.

19:56 Nicole Sullivan Bad example, bad example.

19:57 Adam Really? He's got a feminine?

19:59 Drew How about the interior?

20:00 Adam It's a feminine.

20:01 Caller Look for the areas, fill that space, all right?

20:03 Adam Yeah, that's Lowe. What the hell's that guy's name? Chris Lowe. Chris Lowe. He's a surprise, surprise interior decorator.

20:10 Caller I see him on TV.

20:11 Adam He's not gay. I see a wedding ring on his head.

20:14 Caller Look at me.

20:14 Drew Okay, what are you calling about?

20:16 Caller Well, you know, I'm very upset about this. I don't know if he deserves it or...

20:22 Drew What? Deserves what?

20:23 Caller Well, that he turned around and he slept with my best friend while I was like in the other room. So...

20:30 Drew During that threesome night?

20:31 Caller Well, it was one of the times that we had a threesome.

20:34 Nicole Sullivan Another friend, not the guy.

20:35 Adam Yeah, a female friend, right?

20:37 Caller It was one of my good friends.

20:38 Adam Yeah.

20:39 Drew How dare he? After you've been cornholing with the other guy. Yeah.

20:44 Caller Well, you know, he okayed that. You know, I even called him every time that was his thing. I had to call him and ask him.

20:49 Drew Oh, my God. There's some sort of release you signed for each other?

20:53 Caller No, there might as well have been.

20:54 Adam All right, Kate. Listen, listen. I got to talk to Kate first. Kate, how many kids do you have?

21:01 Caller Just one.

21:01 Adam Okay. Your vagina should be sealed with the cement and cinder block. Do you hear me? Like Al Capone's vault. That's what your vagina should be. So, help me, Christ, if you have any more kids, I will consider you public enemy number one.

21:15 Drew You can't on all these maps.

21:18 Adam You're just going to single-handedly screw up that country.

21:21 Drew Are you taking birth control?

21:23 Caller Yeah, I have an OED.

21:25 Adam Good. All right. Focus on that one kid and focus on being a good mama and that means stability in the relationship.

21:32 Caller What do you think I should do?

21:34 Drew I think let him go. Listen, recommit yourself to this relationship. Get back into a little practice of monogamy here. You got a lot of chaos and a lot of difficulty containing your emotions. Why not just stay in a calm, de-escalated, non-dramatic relationship? Don't get into these threesomes. They always destabilize things. Obviously, it threw open the door for other boundary issues to be violated. Just recommit to each other. Start over and don't have any agreements where you can do anything away from each other.

22:02 Adam That's wonderful advice.

22:03 Caller Kim? Yes.

22:05 Adam You have 33?

22:06 Caller Yes.

22:06 Adam What's up?

22:08 Caller Well, I've been divorced for seven years and I have no sexual drive whatsoever. None. I haven't had sex in seven years since my divorce. I don't.

22:23 Drew Are you on medication?

22:25 Caller No. No, I'm not on anything.

22:26 Drew You know, women can do that. Do you want to talk about this in lesbian relationships that eventually they stop having sex very quickly? No, I was talking to a lesbian couple about this and apparently it's routine in lesbian relationships for sex to just stop.

22:39 Adam Oh, yeah?

22:39 Drew They have sex for a few months and then they don't anymore. There's no pain in it. Are you sure? Yes.

22:44 Adam We're going to get a lot of calls from a lot of angry lesbians today.

22:47 Drew No, I'm sure there are lesbians that continue to have sex, but it's real common for it.

22:52 Nicole Sullivan That's a huge peppy of mine. Women who pretend that they want to have sex as much as men, that they just can't get enough, are lying through their teeth and have so many. I swear to it. I just can't. It's just not possible. Seven years is a long time. But do you go out with guys and you're not attracted to them once you're in the room with them?

23:08 Caller Oh, no. I'm very attracted to men. Very.

23:12 Drew Is it just that you need to find a relationship?

23:16 Caller Yeah. I think maybe I'm a little bit scared of a relationship.

23:20 Drew Oh, you're fat.

23:21 Adam Oh, Drew, please, please, Drew. Well, first off, let me correct my partner. When a lesbian couple makes love, it's called les off. It is not makes love. Do you understand what I said? I said having sex. Having sex. It's not having sex. Lezzing off. Do you understand? Please. We're going to get letters. Kim, if you met the right guy, do you think you'd get horny?

23:46 Caller I don't know because my marriage wasn't a good one. There was some abuse involved and he was not, he had several affairs on me.

23:55 Adam Alright, so you're a mess.

23:57 Caller I say faithful, but I just, when I talk to friends of mine, they're like, Oh my God, you haven't had sex in seven years. What's wrong with you?

24:04 Drew I know, you're right. But I think if you found a relationship, it would suddenly come back, so to speak. But here's what you got to watch out for. You're the kind of person who will suddenly start dating like an 18-year-old and you, yes, and that's what people do in your situation.

24:17 Adam Now she would have done it.

24:18 Drew She would have done it already.

24:19 Adam Think about that.

24:20 Drew She would have done it right away.

24:21 Adam She would have done it in month number three.

24:22 Drew What a lot of them do is that they just get a boy toy just to sort of have, they just check out on men altogether and start having a sexual thing.

24:29 Adam I was just thinking, Kim, and this is true with a lot of our callers, just needs to replace the word sex with relationship.

24:36 Drew Yes.

24:37 Adam They're talking about what's wrong with sex, what's wrong with the why haven't they had sex, XXXX. Kim needs to focus on being intimate, having a good relationship, and the sex will be right behind it.

24:48 Drew When did you become so reasonable?

24:51 Nicole Sullivan It's my presence. I tend to calm them down.

24:53 Drew Well, you're sort of channeling through you.

24:56 Adam Nicole Sullivan is here. She is my go-hanzit.

25:01 Caller Go-hanzit?

25:03 Adam That's the thing Buddhists sit by. It mellows them out. You know, they put fruit on it.

25:08 Drew Right.

25:09 Caller And they go, NAM-YO-HO-REN-GE-KYO-NO-MO. You know what I think about Buddhism?

25:14 Drew I know what it is. You decide what you want, you think about it.

25:16 Adam You want a car? Chan on it. I'm like, but what about like options like sunroof, air conditioning, stuff like that? Yeah, you can't throw that right in.

25:26 Caller NAM-YO-HO-REN-GE-KYO-NO-MO.

25:31 Nicole Sullivan You basically think they're overly optimistic.

25:34 Adam Yeah.

25:34 Caller Yeah, I think I agree with that.

25:35 Adam And they're like, hey, it works. Yeah, if you sit down for an hour each day and just keep chanting the name of like color TV, you'll get a color TV a little bit faster. Your mind works that way.

25:45 Drew I mean, that time will pass so fast. I realize you have a handler.

25:49 Adam Nicole Sullivan is here from Mad TV, 11 o'clock Saturday night. Drew is, Drew, we have a little conversation.

25:56 Drew Aren't you incredibly hot?

25:56 Adam Yes, I'm incredibly hot.

25:57 Drew I was going to open the door for you.

25:59 Adam I know, but all right. Drew, let's talk about your passive aggressive side when we come back, all right? All right.

26:05 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191, we'll be right back.

26:18 Hey, this is Tyra Banks, and you're listening to Loveline with Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew.

26:24 Caller Yes, you is.

26:25 Adam Nicole Sullivan is our guest tonight. Hi. She's the hot blonde from Mad TV. Eleven o'clock on Fox, Saturday nights. And it's, well, it's in its sixth season, and you're in your sixth season, right?

26:38 Caller Yeah, the end of his sixth season.

26:41 Adam How many people are there, or have been there from the first season?

26:47 Nicole Sullivan Me and Deborah Wilson.

26:48 Adam I was going to say Deborah, but I thought, man, maybe she came on in the second. I didn't know.

26:52 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, she was in the original cast.

26:54 Adam Yeah.

26:54 Nicole Sullivan That's it. Us, too.

26:55 Adam Deborah and I had a real, a real serious heart to heart about four years ago about how she was going to be moving on. And the show was ending. I've had that with every one of the cast members. And most of them have.

27:08 Nicole Sullivan Rub it in, Drew.

27:09 Drew No, no, I'm not.

27:10 Adam I don't mean, he doesn't mean that in a good way. He means we're moved on.

27:14 Caller Yeah, exactly.

27:15 Adam Moving on.

27:17 Caller Yes.

27:18 Adam You're 28. Oh, let me, let me, let's talk about that for one second. I know we're going to talk to you. Well, I think that the problem with being in a sketch comedy show, because people use SNL and some of the other shows, maybe Kids in Hall or SCTV, sort of a template, you're expected to move on in order to be successful, which is every other TV show staying on the air means your success.

27:46 Drew Right.

27:46 Nicole Sullivan Exactly.

27:47 Adam If you have a sitcom and you're going in to the seventh season and you're a cast member in that sitcom, hey, you're doing great, like no one says to you, a little disappointed, didn't, still here, still here?

27:58 Nicole Sullivan No one looked at Ted Danson like, come on, dude, what are you doing?

28:01 Yeah, still here?

28:02 Adam Yeah.

28:02 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

28:02 Adam I think that all the time, but yeah. Actually, Tony Danson is the one I always think of. Really? Another show? Really, Seth? Do we need one? Don't you have eight? But if you're in doing sketch comedy, I think the expectation is like, well, you should be doing movies. You should. You should.

28:20 Nicole Sullivan Oh, yeah. Like you can tell, like when we're going into like our fourth and fifth season, like, you know, casting directors or producer or whatever, be like, good for you. My goodness. That's right. You've been. Oh, and now at the end of six, they're like, mm hmm. So you're not going to go back, right? I mean, you can tell they really just like, if you do, you're a little pathetic. Yeah, but we make fun of what's the what's the black dude is on Saturday Night Live forever.

28:39 Adam Garrett Morris, Tim Meadows, Tim Meadows.

28:42 Nicole Sullivan We used to make fun of him. And also I was like, wait, how long was Tim on? Have I crossed Tim Meadows' line?

28:47 Adam Oh, yes. I think you may have crossed the Tim Meadows threshold. Although Tim Meadows was on SNL for like four years before you knew he was on SNL. Jimmy, you're 28.

29:01 Caller Correct.

29:01 Adam What's up?

29:03 Caller I kind of had a question probably geared more towards Dr. Drew. The question is how to become resensitized to nudity in this sexual environment. I work in a strip club and have for a number of years and you get so numb and desensitized to nudity. It kind of hurts things in the bedroom. If you know what I'm saying with my wife and I. I wonder if there's something I could do to re-channel myself and somehow become resensitized.

29:35 Drew I'm trying to interpret what he's saying. Because whatever is happening is not what he thinks is happening. You understand what I'm saying?

29:42 Adam Well, so I mean, can it be like a guy who works at a chocolate factory wants to learn how to enjoy chocolate again on Easter? No, but that was pretty good, right? That was good.

29:55 Drew Nice try.

29:58 Nicole Sullivan I like the specificity of Easter.

29:59 Adam Well, movie of the week, I smell coming up. Johnny C's.

30:04 All right.

30:05 Adam Jimmy?

30:05 Yes.

30:06 Adam What do you do at this strip club?

30:07 Caller I'm a DJ.

30:08 Adam I see. And topless and bottomless?

30:13 Just topless.

30:14 Drew What do you mean by desensitized? You mean your wife isn't attractive to you?

30:17 Caller Oh, no, no, no, no. She's the most beautiful woman on the planet. It's nothing.

30:21 Drew Do you have your feelings about women change as a result of seeing all this?

30:25 Caller No, my ex-wife did that one.

30:27 Adam Oh, that's what we're talking about. Hey, Jimmy, what song do you spin the most at the club? I'm more curious about this DJ aspect.

30:36 Caller It depends on what country you're in. Obviously, you can tell I'm in the south. You can probably pick up on that by my horrible accent. But probably you should me on that long.

30:47 Adam Oh, yeah. That's a good one.

30:49 Drew Who's that song?

30:50 Adam ACDC. Yeah, that's good. That's a good strip club. I don't like the ones that play that like Janet Jackson and stuff. It's kind of weird, weird upscale dance music.

30:58 Nicole Sullivan Old school. You like old school?

30:59 Adam I like old school. We do, man. Stranger and some rats and some cherry pie. Yeah, that's good. And Jimmy, you're the guy who's in the background with just basically annoying banter while I'm trying to get some wood. I'm an amateur now. I went to the ATM. I went to the $18 bottle mini jam in Baltimore. Give me, what is, Jimmy, what's in your ramp? Give me a little of that ramp. Give me the part where you're trying to get guys to fork out some dough to show the ladies that they care.

32:02 Caller I've heard you do this before. Another DJ called in and I'm not going to humiliate myself on the air.

32:08 Adam Okay, you don't have to go into the voice, but just give me your sort of calling card phrase when, you know, you're talking to the guys about the ladies.

32:18 Caller I don't have a calling card.

32:20 Adam Come on, what's one that you've repeated a few times?

32:23 Caller One that I've repeated a few times?

32:25 Yeah. Hold on a second.

32:31 Adam I have a question for Dr. Drew. Why is it every road is a cul-de-sac in this show? Why is everyone just an alley with a brick wall at the end of it? We got a goddamn DJ, strip club DJ. All I'm asking him for is one phrase that he might say, like if he was doing dragsters, he might say, some go, some blow. That means like one little thing that I know he says five or six hundred times a night every goddamn night and we won't get it out of him. Why does that work? Jimmy?

33:04 Caller Yes, sir.

33:04 Adam You give me that phrase right now or I will hang up on your southern ass.

33:09 Caller The threats work. My favorite phrase is let's make some noise.

33:14 Nicole Sullivan I like it.

33:15 Caller That's it. That lame, that boring.

33:18 Adam It's not really specific to the street.

33:20 Drew He wants to be able to use it later.

33:23 Caller I'm done talking to people. It's a theory. I'm so done.

33:26 Drew Jimmy, so what is it about women?

33:28 Adam Never anything good. Ever.

33:30 Drew Ever. Given that that's true, whose fault is it? You're right.

33:35 Adam I should never ask. The guy's a DJ. That's what he does. He can't give me one. There's not one thing. Just nothing. Nothing. And then he gives me some generic thing that could be used at a bar mitzvah or a goddamn rodeo. Nothing. Zero. As usual. Never got a good answer out of anybody's ever called.

33:56 Nicole Sullivan I've got a specific question. How do you encourage them to tip the ladies? What phrase would you use to encourage them to tip?

34:02 Caller Always ask for gratuity for the nudity.

34:05 Drew There's a little song, man. Adam is relieved.

34:09 Adam Twenty minutes ago, did I say, how, what is the phrase used to get the girls, to give the money to the girls? Did I say that?

34:16 Caller Lay some greenery on the scenery.

34:17 Caller There we go.

34:19 Nicole Sullivan You're making his night now.

34:20 Adam I'm getting coffee.

34:21 Nicole Sullivan He's angry.

34:22 Drew No, he's angry.

34:24 Nicole Sullivan That was the pleasure pain thing that has sent him out of his chair.

34:26 Caller I just wasn't going to do it for him.

34:28 Drew I understand. I'm glad he left room not to hear that. But let's talk a little bit about what you feel about women and why you might have changed or this experience may have sort of rekindled some of those feelings that your ex-wife sort of set in stone for you.

34:41 Caller It's a long term thing. You're around it so much.

34:46 Drew I don't buy that.

34:47 Caller I don't buy that. Let me put it to you this way. If I was to be walking down the street, sitting at the laundromat, if a chicken laundromat took her shirt off and threw it in the washing machine, it wouldn't arouse you. I wouldn't take anything of it.

35:00 Drew I understand that doesn't arouse you, but you're saying the actual physical intimacy with your wife is unsatisfying.

35:05 Caller No, I'm not saying that that's unsatisfying. I'm just saying that I'm almost numb to the fact of her being nude in the house.

35:14 Drew Yeah, so...

35:15 Caller Is that just like a natural thing that comes from being married for a number of years?

35:19 Drew Some of it is that, some of it...

35:20 Caller Or is that a result of work?

35:21 Drew I think it's both. I think certainly you're in an environment where it would be normal to be sort of desensitized by that sensory experience that's bombarding you every night.

35:30 Caller It's annoying.

35:31 Drew Yeah, and it has to change your feelings about women a little bit, too. And you missed what he said, Adam's back. Wait, your mic's not working.

35:41 Adam Yeah, I don't care about this guy. I'm so fed up with him. I begged him for one of those party shots.

35:48 Drew I just wasn't going to tell him. I was going to give it up for him. Is that every answer to no stuff?

35:52 Adam Everyone just kissed my ass. I'm moving on to the next call. Screw all of you. Blake?

35:57 Hello?

35:58 Adam You're 27.

35:59 Caller Yeah, I just want to say hi, Nicole. I've watched MAD since October 15th, 1995, every season. Hey. I'm a big fan of it. Good knowing. And I have some quick questions. Do you have like a fan club at all?

36:15 Adam You're looking at them, right? True, that is.

36:20 Caller Yeah.

36:21 Caller Okay, but what about...

36:21 Adam Yeah, what about your fan club?

36:22 Nicole Sullivan I don't have a fan club, no. We have the websites. There's stuff on there. All of my websites are fan-made, which is like flattery slash creepy, but they're all... No, but they're great sites. There's message boards on there and stuff like that.

36:38 Adam There's no official Fox one?

36:41 Nicole Sullivan There must be, but the fan ones are so much better. These kids make some amazing websites. Fox is fine.

36:47 Adam Well, we have the same thing on this show. Nothing really official, but some fan-tabulous, fan-tabulous Loveline websites that neither Drew or I have ever seen.

36:57 Caller But I agree. Yeah. I just want to know how long you're going to see I'm mad and if there's any possibility to be posing for Playboy.

37:08 Nicole Sullivan Well, let me answer the obvious question. Yes, I will be posing for Playboy. No, I will never do that. Not because I have anything against it, because I have cellulite and I don't want anyone to see it. And MADtv will be done this year.

37:21 Caller Oh, bummer.

37:22 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, but we're going into syndication so you can watch the show eight times a minute.

37:28 Caller Syndication.

37:29 Caller Oh, sure. Yeah.

37:30 Drew Good time.

37:30 Nicole Sullivan Thank you very much. That's very sweet of you, Blake.

37:33 Caller Bye.

37:33 Adam Thanks, Blake. Where are you going?

37:35 Nicole Sullivan I shot a pilot and hopefully hopefully get picked up. I don't know if it will. We'll find out in like three weeks.

37:41 Drew She'll be with your friends at ABC.

37:42 Adam Oh, really?

37:43 Drew Yeah.

37:43 Adam Oh, good times.

37:44 Caller Yeah.

37:45 Adam Who do you know over there?

37:47 Nicole Sullivan Carolyn Ginsburg and oh, wait a minute.

37:50 Adam Carolyn Ginsburg, the world's most unfunny woman.

37:55 Caller Oh, I think she's.

37:55 Adam Oh, no, you know, I really do. Wait a minute. Just a woman I'm thinking of. Sort of young, sort of pretty.

38:01 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

38:01 Adam Zero sense of humor. Zero.

38:05 Nicole Sullivan I knew her personally before I knew her. I legitimately like her.

38:08 Drew Adam, just because somebody doesn't laugh at your humor.

38:11 Adam Carolyn Ginsburg can kiss my ass. I had a meeting with them.

38:13 Drew Whoa.

38:15 Adam No, it's a few years ago. No. Oh, my God. She is so funny. Well, she's not a stand-up, but you know, I think she. I like. No. Horribly. Horribly. She has zero, zero sense of humor.

38:24 Drew I can't we can check ABC off your list.

38:26 Nicole Sullivan I think I think they have really good notes, actually. I have.

38:29 Adam Oh, really?

38:29 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. Everyone's like, oh, the network notes.

38:31 Adam Not Carolyn Ginsburg. I really like their notes.

38:33 Nicole Sullivan I thought they made like a lot of sense and much to the smay of my producers, but I thought they were really good news.

38:38 Adam Who else is in it? Tony Danza? Tony.

38:40 Nicole Sullivan Tony and me. No, Stephen Root from News Radio, the boss from News Radio.

38:46 Adam Oh, yes. Yeah. He's good.

38:48 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. A woman named a girl named Amy Farrington.

38:51 Adam Who is that?

38:52 Caller Where is she from?

38:53 Nicole Sullivan From Chicago. Sort of a newcomer. And Tony Rock's brother, Chris Rock's brother Tony.

38:57 Adam What's the story about?

39:00 Caller Or what's the...

39:00 Nicole Sullivan It's low concept. Do you know Judy Toll?

39:03 Adam No. Why?

39:04 Nicole Sullivan It's her life.

39:05 Adam Oh, Judy Toll?

39:06 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

39:07 Caller No.

39:08 Nicole Sullivan It's not.

39:09 Adam Drew, do you know Judy Toll?

39:10 Drew Judy? No. No.

39:12 Adam No. What's the deal?

39:15 Nicole Sullivan It's low concept. It's like a 30 year old woman living in a city can't make anything in a relationship. It's Mary Tyler Moore for this one.

39:22 Drew They did that one in HBO, I think, the four women.

39:25 Adam Yeah.

39:25 Nicole Sullivan I had sex with them.

39:27 Adam Well, here's the deal. Any sitcom that is work doesn't really have a concept.

39:33 Drew Yes.

39:34 Adam It just has a good cast. Historically, almost.

39:37 Drew It just has a good cast.

39:37 Caller Yeah.

39:38 Adam I mean, once in a while, something like MASH rolls around or something with a strong setting.

39:43 Nicole Sullivan The bad ones, you make people laugh, they watch the show.

39:45 Adam Right.

39:46 Caller All right.

39:46 Adam So, it looks good?

39:47 Nicole Sullivan It looks good.

39:48 Adam How many are you going to do?

39:50 Nicole Sullivan I'd say, this game. I would say we'll be picked up for 13.

39:54 Adam Oh, really? Wow.

39:55 Nicole Sullivan 13 episodes.

39:56 Caller Yeah, that's good.

39:58 Adam No, no. What, not 25 years? Well, that's pretty good.

40:03 Caller Yeah.

40:04 Nicole Sullivan Well, I don't know. We haven't happened yet.

40:05 Adam And you're going to be partying on MADtv on good terms?

40:08 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. Oh, yeah. Great terms.

40:10 Adam Oh, really?

40:10 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. I'm so much happier now than I ever was there.

40:12 Drew Geez.

40:12 Adam You don't want to tell them to kiss your ass or anything?

40:15 Drew No, no. Contrary to your understanding, every relationship you move away from, you may not want to look back at it.

40:20 Nicole Sullivan Oh, no. I was screaming kiss my ass to MADtv about three years ago, with lawsuits. It was an uuuuugh situation. Oh, really?

40:28 Caller Why?

40:29 Nicole Sullivan Because we had some producers that ran a real bad, real badly run set. It was real mean and real nasty. I mean, I was crying every day. Every day. I mean, I would rather type memos for, you know, a fat old man at IBM than this. It was so horrible.

40:46 Caller But that was great.

40:48 Adam Yeah, really?

40:48 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, I love it now.

40:49 Caller Let me patch it up. All right.

40:50 Adam Well, they gave you some hush money. Well, hey, Drew, remember hush money? It used to be hush money. You don't hear about hush money anymore. I'd like to get some hush money. Maybe our affiliates or sponsors will kick in and give me some money to keep me quiet.

41:05 Drew Maybe I'll just do that.

41:06 Adam Drew, what do you got? Go by the ATM. See if you can shut me up for the next hour and 20 minutes. Nicole Sullivan is here for MADtv. I was going to give the time and the day of the show and stuff, but let's not do that anymore. She's only going to be on for one more year. We'd like to sort of have people wind down on it so it reaches an all time low. Just about the time she departs. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

41:28 Caller Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191.

41:46 Caller You're listening to Loveline on Umbrageous Talk Radio 100.7 The Buzz.

42:01 Yeah, what's up? This is the Lated Man, and you're listening to The Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

42:11 Adam Yes, you is. It is the phone number 1-800-LLVE-191. Nicole Sullivan is here from MADtv, and soon from her own TV series on ABC. MADtv, 11 o'clock, Saturday night, Fox.

42:27 Caller And anything anyone wants to say?

42:29 Adam I want to get back to the phones. Everyone good?

42:32 Nicole Sullivan Am I more or less fun than like having a rock band in here? More. More fun? They're really low key?

42:38 Adam Fun is not the word. Easier. Much easier.

42:41 Drew More enjoyable.

42:41 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

42:42 Adam Yeah. We like to relax when we do the show. See, we like to lean back, put the mics on our sternum.

42:49 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

42:50 Adam Drew, if he could get the bass of his mic to stay on, would like to put his mic on his sternum and said he pokes a hole in himself and bleeds internally throughout the show.

42:58 So, Kate?

43:00 Hello?

43:00 Adam You're 22?

43:02 Caller Yep.

43:02 Adam What's up?

43:04 Caller All right. My question is mainly for Dr. Drew. Sometimes when I orgasm with my boyfriend, I'll pee a little bit too.

43:14 Drew Some women pee a lot when they orgasm. And it's normal.

43:17 Caller Well, like I can't feel it, so it's weird.

43:19 Drew All right. It's not no big deal. You sure it's pee and not sort of female ejaculation?

43:24 Caller Right.

43:25 Drew You're sure it's pee? Yeah.

43:27 Give me a break.

43:28 Drew Well, no. You can have... There are other fluids that can be emitted during orgasm.

43:32 Caller Right, but... Yeah, it's pee, but it's not all the time. All right.

43:37 Drew Well, it's normal. That's a common thing. You can do some Kegel exercises. That might help control it. But it's female orgasmic incontinence is a common thing.

43:46 Adam Kate, are you calling from a cell phone?

43:48 Caller Yeah.

43:49 Adam Are you on a train or does it just sound like it?

43:52 Caller No, I'm in my car.

43:53 Adam Okay. Well, I really had a nice real sub-wife feel to it. Okay. Did you did you hear Drew?

43:59 Caller Yeah, I did.

44:00 Caller All right.

44:00 Adam Okay.

44:00 Caller Thanks a lot. You guys are great.

44:02 Caller All right.

44:02 Adam Thank you. I just didn't get the feeling you want to hear whatever it is you had to say. But yeah, you don't. I mean, people think they can tell urine, but slight amounts. I don't know.

44:16 Drew You've got to take some vitamins beforehand if you get some fluorescent color going and see if.

44:20 Adam I tell you, I ate a bushel of asparagus yesterday, as I was talking about on the air. That's proof positive right there. You'll know.

44:27 Drew As people know, Adam and I pee next to each other during the show.

44:31 Adam We do the swords crossing.

44:32 Drew Yeah. And we fight a little bit sometimes. And man, this guy who's had a vitamin, he has like radioactive.

44:39 Caller Really?

44:40 Drew Yeah.

44:41 The whole room lights up.

44:42 Adam That's right.

44:43 Drew The fluorescent color, the posters get funny colors and the black lights up.

44:48 Nicole Sullivan That's why I don't like taking vitamins, because I like to tell how much water I'm drinking, because if your urine's clear, that means you're drinking enough water. If it's not, you should be having more water-ish.

44:58 Adam Really?

45:00 Nicole Sullivan And the vitamins throw it off. Am I right? Is that not right?

45:02 Drew Well, it's kind of right.

45:03 Adam You drink a 12 pack and it comes out clear too, right?

45:06 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, really?

45:09 Adam Yeah. Not that you're an alcoholic, but you may be. You may be.

45:12 Nicole Sullivan I may just be.

45:13 Caller All right.

45:14 Adam Brenda?

45:15 Caller Yes.

45:16 Adam You're 25?

45:17 Caller Yes.

45:18 Caller Hi, Dr. Drew. Hi, Brenda. Hello, Adam.

45:20 Adam Yes.

45:21 Caller My question, I have a great relationship. We've been in a relationship six years, and I've done to this guy like 16 times, and he still loves me. He's great. We're both adults and alcoholics.

45:32 Drew Hang on.

45:32 Adam Let her keep going.

45:34 Drew Can I just point out the-

45:35 Caller No, no, no. Listen. I have four kids. They're not exposed to dysfunction. I mean, it's all good, but our relationship lately, it's like I'm not feeling satisfied.

45:46 Drew All right. Let's look at a couple of things here. First of all, your levels of denial about this whole situation is incredibly profound, right? Incredible. We have four children, same guy. You've had all four kids with?

45:59 Caller No.

45:59 Drew Okay. So all right. So say the kids have not been exposed to dysfunction is bizarre, given that they all are different fathers.

46:07 Caller No, they don't. I was in a marriage to a person who was like, who I married my Imago. I was raped by my father. I married someone like that, got out of that, got a lot of therapy, got my head straight, got, you know, and my kids are, I mean, my kids are great.

46:23 Drew Imago, don't, don't, don't, this is Imago theory.

46:27 Adam Oh, really?

46:27 Drew Don't worry about it.

46:28 Adam What is that?

46:29 Drew Not worth going down that road.

46:30 Adam I want to know what the Imago theory is. It sounds like fertile comedy soil for me.

46:35 Drew I was trying to protect you, Brenda, from this. It is basically what we talk about all the time, that the imprint of dad is a concept, an Imago, if you will, that you'll then go out and find in a peer for a love relationship.

46:49 Adam I haven't come across an Imago since I've been here.

46:53 Caller I got out of that and I have a great relationship.

46:55 Drew Okay, but let's just examine reality. Reality is these kids have been exposed to a lot. You've dumped this guy 16 times.

47:02 Nicole Sullivan The first flag is that you're saying you're in a wonderful relationship. And I think I know what you're saying is that you're in a relationship with what maybe you think is a wonderful guy and that he loves you despite your issues. That does not mean you're in a good relationship though. I don't think any relationship where someone's dumping anyone 16 times is good.

47:20 Drew Right. So those issues are not really...

47:21 Caller I'm afraid to be... I think I deserve to be happy.

47:24 Drew Okay. But now that you've sort of succumbed to this guy, so to speak, you're going to sabotage it because he's not the imago you need to stay sort of adequately around in the relationship.

47:36 Adam I yelled at everyone to get...

47:38 Caller Hold on a second.

47:39 Drew Well, then stay with this guy and really focus on achieving true intimacy with him.

47:44 Adam I yelled at everyone to get into therapy. Turns out they're annoying. They'll learn a few words. I don't like them as much. I like you better when you're screwed up.

47:53 Nicole Sullivan Do you guys go to program together or something?

47:56 Caller We've been to adult children and alcoholics together. We've done a lot together. But the problem, we really... The problem, I guess, is communication because I go through things, flashbacks, nightmares, that sort of thing. I just feel really sort of needy. And lately, I feel like he doesn't, he isn't giving me enough attention.

48:20 Adam Well, look at it this way. If you do break up, you know you'll get back together. That'll be on number 17. Listen, okay, a couple of things. First off, no more kids, please. No more kids.

48:31 Caller We're not having any more children. Thank you. And we've taken preventive measures to keep our children from having, you know, residual, you know, effects of this.

48:41 Adam Too late. You could give those kids to rodeo clowns. They'd be better off. They really would. They'd be raised in one of those fiberglass barrels they put out in the middle of the pen there. We'd be better off than you guys. You, you're sober, you're, you're doing the steps and all that kind of stuff.

48:58 Caller You're kidding me, right? I'm not even an addict.

49:00 Adam No, she's, yeah, but she's going to adult children. You're going to the, you're going to the program for adult children.

49:06 Drew Here's the deal, Brenda, you, you, the neediness, he's not, he's not your therapist and you may have some true psychologics slash psychiatric needs right now and it may be time to get back into some therapy and not dump all this on him. Okay? All right. That's what I said.

49:21 Adam How about that, Brenda? And Brenda?

49:23 Drew And we can feel it. We can feel that need. Oh, yeah.

49:26 Adam Brenda, let me give you a tip. Please listen to this. All right?

49:29 Caller I'm listening. I listen to you guys all the time.

49:31 Adam Thank you. And as you know, I'm a genius. I'm a sage. I'm Mago. I have a handful of friends, really just one or two who are who you remind me of. They read all the books. They do all the steps. They're involved with every program. They do all the therapy. And then basically they just become sort of the playback tape recorders of all the stuff they've learned. But they never live it. They have a crazy life. They know all the knowledge.

50:02 Nicole Sullivan They never change their behavior.

50:04 Adam They know it psychologically. But they never live it. You want to have a sane life, you got to live it. And sometimes that means faking it, everybody. That means going to work when you don't feel like going to work. That means picking up stuff and doing stuff and all those little chores that sane people do that you don't really want to do, even if it means just act, not getting a blowout with your boyfriend at a restaurant, whatever, all that stuff that sane people do, you can just do it. You can actually just think about it all the time and go, what would a sane person do right now? I bet he wouldn't argue with this guy, I bet he'd just pay the bill and leave, I bet he wouldn't argue with the boyfriend, I bet he'd go to work, I bet he'd pick up after the kids or she'd do whatever. Just do it and then eventually that'll become your life. But if you just sort of live in this sort of hypothetical, psychological world, you can still be screwed up and have all the information at your fingertips and never use it. Okay, Nicole Sullivan is our guest from MADtv. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

51:08 Caller We'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

51:27 Caller You're listening to Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio. 100.7 The Buzz. Outrageous Talk Radio. 100.7 The Buzz. KQBC, Seattle.

51:54 Adam It's Loveline, I'm Adam Carolla, that is Dr. Drew. Over there, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191, Nicole Sullivan is here tonight, she's from MADtv. I believe she's been coming on this show since I've been here, since MADtv's been here. You had a friend on MADtv for a while. I know a few people over there.

52:17 Drew Lisa, maybe?

52:18 Adam Oh, Mary? Who was over there?

52:23 Nicole Sullivan Mary Shear.

52:24 Adam Mary Shear.

52:24 Nicole Sullivan Bill and Mar, you knew, didn't you?

52:26 Adam Yeah.

52:27 Drew You had somebody that you used to hang. Lisa Cuchelle.

52:29 Adam Lisa Cuchelle. Thank you, Drew. You didn't bring up her last name. That was a promise. That was a friend. You brought up her first name and said she was on MADtv. That wasn't enough.

52:37 Drew And if I remember right, she lived in the apartment with you for a couple years?

52:42 Adam No.

52:42 Drew Her boyfriend lived?

52:43 Adam No, another Lisa.

52:45 Nicole Sullivan That's Alex Borstein. Her husband lived with you for a couple years.

52:48 Drew See?

52:49 Adam No, you're talking about Alex Borstein's husband, Doug Jackson. No, we used to just smoke pot together.

52:55 Nicole Sullivan Oh, okay.

52:55 Adam Yeah.

52:56 Drew Nice.

52:58 Adam Yay. He had this seven-foot novelty bong that he made. Doug's probably not excited about me telling this story on the air, but it was made at about an eight-foot piece of a two-inch diameter PVC pipe. One of the only bongs I've ever come across, it took two or three guys to operate.

53:17 Drew Did you have a big fan underneath it?

53:19 Adam It was like one of those... Well, you couldn't light it and smoke it at the same time because you couldn't get down to the bowl that was in the other room. It was eight feet away. And yeah, it was kind of like that Rekola commercial where they're blowing those alpine horns.

53:33 Nicole Sullivan Does the pot get better as it travels down longer? No, it's just your friends go like, wow, that's a big bong.

53:39 Adam No, you never get any pot. You can't suck it that far. Yeah, boy, yeah, that guy. Well, I'll tell you, I want to talk about Slob. This guy, Doug, he had his apartment was such a disaster. It was eventually condemned after the 94 earthquake. His apartment had a shopping cart in it and he was on the third floor of his apartment. He had a shopping cart in the room and in his room. And he was on the third floor of the building. That's bad when you have a shopping cart in your room.

54:10 Drew Yeah, third floor is filled with Frank.

54:12 Nicole Sullivan That took an effort at some point.

54:13 Drew You and Lisa Cuchelle, I thought you were dear, dear, dear friends.

54:16 Adam Yeah, we're dear, dear, dear, dear, dear friends.

54:19 Drew It turns out you're just dear friends.

54:20 Adam Yeah, I forgot Lisa Cuchelle was on MADtv. Uh, Nicole?

54:26 Caller Yeah.

54:26 Adam You got a question for our Nicole?

54:29 Caller Um, yeah, I just, well, not really a question. I just wanted to tell you that you are really brilliant and I've seen every show since it came out and you've always been my favorite.

54:40 Caller Oh, that's very sweet.

54:41 Caller And it's not going to be the same without you.

54:44 Nicole Sullivan Oh, that's really nice.

54:45 Caller Thank you, Nicole.

54:46 Nicole Sullivan My gosh, you're a dedicated fan. I like it.

54:48 Drew She even changed her name.

54:52 Caller I also have a question.

54:53 Adam And she's 16. That means she was watching at 10.

54:58 Caller Pretty scary, huh?

54:59 Adam Yeah. Watching all those MC Hammer parodies.

55:06 Caller I also have a question for you, Adam and Dr. Drew. Yeah. I'm having troubles with my boyfriend. I've been trying to call him to the show forever. I've been with him for six and a half months, and I can't have an orgasm. And we've had sex and oral sex. And I haven't had one since December, and I've only gotten one twice.

55:30 Adam But you had it during oral sex? Mm-hmm.

55:33 Caller Both times. And with a past boyfriend, I had had oral sex with him, and I would have an orgasm almost every time.

55:42 Drew So does your new boyfriend know what he's doing?

55:46 Caller I think that might be part of the problem.

55:48 Drew Did you?

55:48 Adam Yeah, well, make sure you discuss that with him and see if you can weave in the name of your ex. Rick used to do it like this. No, that's not how Rick would do it.

55:56 Drew It takes three seconds of Rick.

55:58 Adam They called him the GECO. He had a technique that, well, let me show you.

56:04 Caller Well, I've talked to him about it.

56:05 Adam Does he know about this other guy?

56:08 Caller Well, he knows about him, but he doesn't.

56:10 Caller I've not talked about like what all I've done with him.

56:13 Adam Very smart.

56:14 Caller I have talked to him and I told him what I do and don't like when he's down there and even when we're just talking and we're really open with each other. But it just, I don't know. It doesn't even really feel good anymore.

56:28 Adam I'm thinking she ain't too into this dude.

56:30 Caller Oh, no. I love him to death.

56:32 Drew I think I think this guy is just lame.

56:34 Adam Really? Is it just his technique back?

56:36 Drew Yeah.

56:38 Adam Listen, he doesn't use my vaginal carpet bombing technique. I was discussing last night as it applies to oral sex.

56:44 Drew Where are you calling from?

56:45 Caller Ohio. Where? Dayton area.

56:48 Drew Now, are you hearing last night's show there?

56:51 Caller I didn't hear last night.

56:54 Drew No, because I think last night's show we played in Dayton.

56:57 Adam Are we a day behind over there?

56:58 Caller Yes, it's like 2.06 here.

57:00 Drew We'll listen to the... Oh, they already playered it. Because the show we did, we discussed this sort of issue in great detail.

57:09 Adam You guys are breaking each other in. You're ahead of him.

57:13 Drew Yeah.

57:13 Adam And you're just going to have to bring him along.

57:15 Drew You're going to have to sort of urge him gently sort of... Talk about what you talked about last night, the Pin the Tail and the Donkey.

57:21 Adam No, I don't feel like it.

57:22 Drew Come on. Come on. Nicole, this woman needs the information.

57:25 Adam Well, let me ask. Let me ask you something.

57:27 Nicole Sullivan Here's a big difference with... Often you can tell them, you can go, okay, this is what I do and don't like. It's amazing. And I know how you feel on the subject. You're like, the guys want to know. Guys nod and they nod and they nod. But some sort of part of them really thinks they are instinctually doing it right, whatever way they're doing it. So you really need to say to them, hear this. That makes me feel uncomfortable. And at a certain point, it just gets irritating because you're not having fun. And then the irritation is just cumulative. And then you're just annoyed. So it's not like you can't have one. It's not that you don't love him. It's just you're annoyed because he's not making you feel good. But you can get there.

58:00 Adam Nicole's a real angry lady.

58:02 Nicole Sullivan Did I sound really angry just now?

58:04 Adam I did, didn't I? You've known her for a while. Let's try. Nicole is a fine actress and performer. I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll do a little sort of pin the tail on the donkey, which is you don't have to sit down and discuss this. Discuss this with your guy. But like when you play pin the tail on the donkey, you go, no, you're cold, cold, cold. Oh, you're in the Arctic Circle. You're in Tundra, permafrost. Oh, sorry to warm up. Oh, heading toward the equator. Warmer, on fire, surface of the sun. That's what you need to do. What?

58:33 Caller The sad thing is I found that.

58:35 Caller I tried everything. And I kind of, another question is, is I discovered the vibrator recently. I'm thinking that's making matters worse.

58:44 Adam How different is this guy's technique than the first guy's?

58:48 Caller Well, he, I don't know, he always complains that his tongue gets tired.

58:53 And he uses it at all.

58:54 Caller He doesn't like, not to be gross, but he doesn't suck or anything. And the other guy used to just, he used to tease me and tease me.

59:00 Caller And he knew every special spot.

59:03 Caller And he just, I don't know.

59:06 Drew You're 16?

59:07 Caller And this other guy, like, he really gets me turned on. But as soon as he goes down there with this face, it's.

59:13 Adam All right. You just got to work it out.

59:15 Drew She may have to be. She may have Nicole's right. She may have to sit down and go, hey, this is right.

59:19 Adam Nicole, play along with me. Yeah, I'm going to go down on you.

59:24 Nicole Sullivan OK.

59:25 Adam No, I mean, not on the radio.

59:26 Drew She seems very excited about that. Yeah.

59:28 Adam All right.

59:29 Drew OK, go ahead.

59:30 Adam Now, you you you show audibly. You let the women know how it works. OK. You know what I mean? And you see, you don't have to go stop. No, there, no more of that, no more to your right. Right. You can make these little audible noises that let a guy know he's on the right trail. And and and silence will will be deafening, too, when there's nothing going on.

59:53 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the biggest one of silence. My personal fave.

59:58 Adam OK, we have some music, Anderson, some some more sexy. No, no, no, no, no.

1:00:06 Drew We'll do it.

1:00:06 Adam Give me a bass line. Give me a bass line. Come on, Anderson. This is I feel like I'm making a good point. Oh, I feel like I'm pulling up her poodle skirt. You're going to finish that wine cooler? I've had enough. And you sure? Yeah, just ease back.

1:00:23 Nicole Sullivan OK, yeah, no, I can't.

1:00:25 Adam I shouldn't. I should. That's cool, baby. Finish that cooler and just lie back. Let me slide this on back.

1:00:46 Nicole Sullivan It's not so echoey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

1:00:53 Caller Yeah.

1:00:56 Caller There you go. Oh, baby.

1:00:59 Caller Oh, God.

1:01:07 Adam Are you done? Yeah.

1:01:08 Nicole Sullivan That was great, sweetie.

1:01:10 Adam Thanks. Great. All right. I'm going to split because I got to get up real. Oh, wait. Can I have a BJ? Yeah. Yeah. Then I'm going to split. Yeah. Because I got to I got to be up at noon tomorrow. So I got to play hacky sack at one. If you let the guy know when he's doing something you like and he'll stay with that, there's a guy. Isn't that what a male's instinct is? You start hearing something you like, like, oh, yeah. Well, then you'll you'll stick with that.

1:01:43 Drew But some guys will start getting, like, vigorous at that point. They'll get all excited and start doing it faster or harder. Yeah, that's a big mistake. Right. Hang back. Just do exactly what you just did. Just repeat that.

1:01:53 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, I can't I always I can't stress enough the words don't stop mean exactly that. Don't stop. Don't change it. Don't do more. Just don't stop doing what you're doing.

1:02:04 Adam Yeah. Most guys here, when you say don't stop, they are much now they don't know that that's a cue to speed up.

1:02:12 Drew Yeah, it's like a four speed.

1:02:14 Adam Right. And then it spins out of control because like, oh, yeah, don't stop. Guys are speeding up. Don't stop. Don't stop. Don't stop. And he starts speeding up. The more she owns, don't stop.

1:02:25 Caller Yeah.

1:02:26 Adam You should. I don't know. We should replace don't stop with right there. Or good, you know, right there.

1:02:34 Caller Okay.

1:02:35 Adam Yeah, right there.

1:02:36 Caller Yeah, that's good.

1:02:37 Adam I think I'd be good. I'd be good with a vagina if I had one. I think I could control. Pretty good. You don't think so? They'd be out of control.

1:02:44 Drew Yeah.

1:02:45 Adam Miranda?

1:02:46 Caller Hi.

1:02:46 Adam You're 17?

1:02:47 Drew Yeah.

1:02:48 Caller How are you?

1:02:48 Adam Good. What's up?

1:02:49 Good.

1:02:51 Caller Let's see. My boyfriend and I have been going out for just a few months and we're really committed to each other and I'm totally in love, but he loves to flirt.

1:02:59 Drew How old is he?

1:03:00 Caller He's 19.

1:03:01 Drew Do you think he could sort of control it? At least when he's around you?

1:03:05 Caller He doesn't though.

1:03:06 Drew But isn't that sort of disrespectful?

1:03:07 It is quite disrespectful.

1:03:10 Drew What kind of relationship is that where there's no sort of reciprocity, no sense of hell care for you? He just does whatever the hell he pleases because it gratifies him, even though it hurts your feelings.

1:03:21 Caller And I don't even know what it's about.

1:03:22 Caller Like, I don't know if he's just searching for approval.

1:03:25 Adam What's he do? Give me, give us a good concrete example of his flirting.

1:03:32 Caller Let's see.

1:03:34 Caller He talks to them sort of how he talks to me.

1:03:38 No, no, no, no, no.

1:03:40 Drew Paint a picture of who this guy is. Does he go to school? What's his deal?

1:03:43 Wait, hold on, hold on. No, OK. Hold on. He doesn't talk to me.

1:03:48 Caller No, he doesn't talk to them exactly how he talks to me.

1:03:51 Drew Just tell me who this guy is. Does he go to school?

1:03:53 Caller Yeah.

1:03:54 Drew He goes to school.

1:03:55 Adam Junior college?

1:03:56 Caller No, he's at UCSD.

1:03:58 Drew San Diego.

1:03:59 Adam That's junior college.

1:04:00 Drew No.

1:04:00 Adam Oh, it's not San Diego State.

1:04:02 Drew You see.

1:04:03 Caller Yeah, it's a good school.

1:04:04 Adam I see.

1:04:04 Drew Why is he dating somebody who's in high school?

1:04:07 Adam I don't know.

1:04:08 Drew He's in junior college.

1:04:11 Adam Yeah. Does he live in San Diego? I mean, is his family from San Diego? Does he live at home or does he live on campus?

1:04:22 Caller He lives on campus.

1:04:23 Nicole Sullivan Do you think, OK, and this is sort of an embarrassing thing to admit, do you think that who's luckier? Do you think he's got the catch or do you think you've got the catch? Have you had to tilt the scale one way or the other way?

1:04:33 Adam Interesting. The number.

1:04:34 Drew Yeah. I was going to say, we we ask, do your numbers match?

1:04:37 Caller Oh, OK.

1:04:37 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. I usually use baseball and I'll just run away. Are you guys playing on the same team in the same field or are you different leagues?

1:04:45 Caller Oh, no, we're totally the same.

1:04:47 Nicole Sullivan So he's not better looking than you by a lot or you're not better looking than him by a lot?

1:04:50 Adam No. All right. He's in the second year of college.

1:04:55 Caller No, first year.

1:04:56 Adam First year.

1:04:57 Nicole Sullivan Sometimes people flirt because they want the other person to feel like they're insecure. They want them to feel lucky. So they go, look how many people like me. You should feel very lucky to be with me.

1:05:08 Caller And at the same time, he should feel lucky to be with me. You know what I mean?

1:05:14 Nicole Sullivan Exactly.

1:05:15 Caller That sounds kind of arrogant.

1:05:16 Drew Why? Tell us why.

1:05:18 Caller Because I've given all of myself to him.

1:05:21 Maybe that was a mistake, but I did.

1:05:24 Drew Yeah.

1:05:24 Caller So, I mean, it's like, what more could he ask?

1:05:28 Drew Uh, is this your first boyfriend?

1:05:30 Caller No.

1:05:31 Adam Okay. I worry a little about this guy. Is he wearing any jewelry?

1:05:36 Caller No.

1:05:36 Adam No. Is he called guys bro or dude?

1:05:40 Caller No.

1:05:40 Drew Dude isn't San Diego.

1:05:42 Adam Okay. Um, why don't you tell him, dude, tell him, tell him you don't appreciate it and give him a chance to quit and give him, remind him a time or two. And if he keeps up, then you got to dump it.

1:05:57 Caller I mean, how should I, how should I bring this up?

1:05:59 Adam Like, how should I, women can, that's, that's something you can bring up within a relationship.

1:06:06 Drew It's not taboo. This really bothers me. It hurts my feelings. You really, if you say you care about me, but there's something that really bothers, really hurts my feelings. I'd appreciate it. I really want you to try not to do this around me.

1:06:18 Adam I do what is the, what would be the opposite of flirting, which is ignore everybody, including my girlfriend and worst of all her friends.

1:06:28 Drew Because then they, then they talk about what a hole you are.

1:06:32 Adam This is my best friend. You walked past her. Who is that? This is a woman. Oh, yeah, Susan. Suzanne. Then I'm driving nuts at that point. I was, all right, whatever. But I just tend to ignore, try to ignore all females. You have to learn to do that as a man, especially when you're out with a woman. You have to, Drew, you're, oh my God. Oh, yeah. Your wife, your wife would kill you. Poor Drew's scared to look up. He looks at his feet when he talks. Yeah. No, ma'am. Yes, ma'am. You really, you're like the kid in Oliver Twist. He was trying to ask for more porridge when he talked to your wife.

1:07:10 Caller Really?

1:07:12 Drew No, no, no. I actually don't feel it at all. Oh, come on.

1:07:15 Adam What do you mean? You're totally freaked out about that. Really?

1:07:20 Drew Yeah.

1:07:21 Adam We had a porn star give you some flowers. You're too scared to bring them home.

1:07:24 Drew Yes, that's a little bit different.

1:07:26 Adam Yeah, you've been many, many examples of you being a P-web.

1:07:29 Drew You know what? I'll tell you what my deal is. I am overly concerned about other people's feelings.

1:07:34 Adam Yes, you are.

1:07:35 Drew As me, all the time.

1:07:36 Adam Yeah, that is true.

1:07:38 Drew And so if I have something that I think might upset my wife, I'm like freaked out about it. I don't want to do that.

1:07:44 Adam Right.

1:07:45 Drew So it may not be her so much as me.

1:07:47 Adam You go to the Playboy Mansion and lie all the time?

1:07:50 Drew All the time.

1:07:51 Adam Right? Remember that time? Yeah. Yeah. I remember that time. Yeah. Drew went to the Playboy Mansion to do Politically Incorrect. I went too. There's a Politically Incorrect from the Playboy Mansion. It went there at 7.15 one night. Was out of there by 9.15 to come do the show. Told his wife he was doing PI but didn't say it mentioned it was at the mansion. Got the ass kicked out of him as soon as he got home. It was great. That was your opportunity, by the way, to really step up, but you didn't.

1:08:23 Nicole Sullivan Was she mad that you lied? I didn't lie.

1:08:26 Adam That's how defensive he is.

1:08:28 Drew It was as though.

1:08:30 Nicole Sullivan The lie of omission.

1:08:30 Adam It's like you're married to Nicole.

1:08:33 Drew Right, that she claimed that I was intentionally holding it.

1:08:37 Adam He did, he did because he didn't want to deal with it.

1:08:39 Nicole Sullivan Do you legitimately think she would have been upset if he had said I'm going to play with a mansion? Not like she would have screamed, but do you think she would have been like, why is it there? Why can't you just do it a normal night?

1:08:47 Adam She would have, and she would have never copped to it. That's the woman's game. It's not that you went to the playboy. It's not that you, you know, whatever, fill in the blank. It's not that you did this. It's that you lied about it. I didn't lie. That's not it.

1:09:01 Nicole Sullivan Right.

1:09:01 Adam Yeah, but that's a woman's rap, isn't it? Yeah. The guys never do that.

1:09:05 Nicole Sullivan It's totally that. It's never a manipulative rap.

1:09:07 Adam The guy never says it. It's not that you gave my best friend Chuck a hand job.

1:09:12 Nicole Sullivan Right.

1:09:12 Adam It's that you lied. No, it's about the hand job.

1:09:15 Nicole Sullivan The hand job, really.

1:09:15 Adam It's nothing but the hand job.

1:09:18 Nicole Sullivan I said that to my boyfriend. I was like, if you ever cheat on me, you just have to just tell me. I mean, just, you know, in like, not that he, I'm making him sound like he's someone who would, he wouldn't, but like. If he did it, you told him. You'd have to. And he's like, would you forgive me? I was like, oh, no, no, absolutely not. Out of the question. But I'm going to say you have to tell me anyway.

1:09:34 Adam Shanna.

1:09:35 Nicole Sullivan That's the rules. Shanna.

1:09:37 Adam Shanna. Yeah.

1:09:38 Drew So the point is, my wife is not unusual as a female. That's just typical.

1:09:42 Adam She's like she's if you took three chicks and stuffed them into one.

1:09:47 Drew That's good. It's a good thing.

1:09:49 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Shanna. Shanna.

1:09:52 Caller Yeah. Shanna. I'm 19 now. I was married at 17 the Saturday before my 18th birthday, actually, because I was pregnant with a guy who at the time I got pregnant, I had known him for about a month.

1:10:09 Adam Well, I'm sure it'll last forever.

1:10:11 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

1:10:12 Nicole Sullivan They're already divorced.

1:10:14 Caller No, we're just sweat up. But we got married because my parents were really pushing for it, and his parents were really pushing for it. And we thought that since I was already pregnant, we needed to try and do the right thing. And then at seven months, I had an abruption, which is where the placenta tears away from the uterus. And we went into the hospital and I had called my midwife and she said that it was nothing. And I'm like, well, something's wrong because it hurts so bad. And the hospital was like two and a half blocks away. So we went to the hospital and I was there for like 12 hours before they would give me any pain medicine or anything. And they kept saying it was a bladder infection or kidney stones. And then they still couldn't figure out what was wrong with me by the next morning and they were doing an ultrasound and all of a sudden they couldn't find the baby's heartbeat. And so the nurse's face went real pale and the room got kind of quiet. And my husband and I had no idea. We didn't even think I was going to be delivering. We had no idea and the doctor had no idea what that the baby was in any sort of jeopardy.

1:11:28 Drew Okay.

1:11:29 Caller That I was even close to delivering.

1:11:31 Drew Okay.

1:11:31 Caller And the doctor came in and he did the sonogram and then announced that the baby was gone. And that I would have to go through the delivery. And so I did that. And my husband and I were so happy.

1:11:51 Adam What did they do?

1:11:52 Caller Induce that?

1:11:53 Adam Induce labor?

1:11:54 Caller Yeah.

1:11:55 Adam They just did it at the same same day?

1:11:57 Caller Well, they drug me to the gills. I mean, they had me really out of it.

1:12:03 Adam Yeah.

1:12:04 Caller And they gave me a whole lot of pitocin. And then afterwards they let us hold her and they took pictures of her.

1:12:13 Adam Oh, what is?

1:12:15 Caller Well, I was pregnant for seven months. I've been expecting all these memories and a little life. I couldn't just pretend it had never happened. And so we had a funeral and we did all that. And so for a long time after that, we were so reeling from that that we didn't really realize what was going on with he and I. And we just kind of started just being like roommates.

1:12:47 Adam I could see that causing a rift. Whose idea was it with the pictures?

1:12:53 Caller The hospital, actually.

1:12:55 Drew Yeah, there's a school of thought that you... There's a school of thought out there.

1:12:59 Adam Weirdo religious hospital or just a regular hospital?

1:13:01 Caller No, it was Legacy.

1:13:03 Drew It's a regular hospital. The people...

1:13:05 Caller They did it because, I don't know, they just... Insurance.

1:13:09 Drew Some people believe it helps the mother deal with the laws.

1:13:11 Caller It did. It really, really does.

1:13:14 Adam Take a picture with your 7-month-old fetus who was born deceased?

1:13:17 Caller She was 5 pounds. If they had known what was going on and induced delivery before it happened, she would have been fine. I could have taken her home.

1:13:25 Adam Well, you really think if they had gotten to you that day kind of thing?

1:13:29 Caller Yeah. If they had known, she would have been fine. But they could...

1:13:33 Drew All right.

1:13:33 Adam So now...

1:13:35 Caller Now we're... Just recently, about a month and a half ago, we both kind of mutually decided that we didn't want to continue tearing each other apart and ruin a decent friendship by having a ridiculous attempt at a marriage.

1:13:50 Drew Okay.

1:13:51 Adam Is that both your ideas or more your idea?

1:13:55 Caller More... I brought it up, but we had both been thinking it, but not wanting to bring it up.

1:14:00 Drew So far I am completely on board with Shanna.

1:14:02 Adam Yeah, I am too.

1:14:03 Drew So what's happening? What do you want to ask guys? You're assuming handling this amazingly well.

1:14:07 Caller Well, the thing is, is that we still sleep together and we live apart, but I'm just so torn because part of me wants to just forget about men. Part of me is like still feeling loyal. All right.

1:14:23 Drew Okay.

1:14:23 Adam Well, wait, you say you have sex?

1:14:26 Caller Yeah.

1:14:27 Drew They haven't totally come apart yet.

1:14:31 Adam But you're not in love with him anymore.

1:14:32 Drew Well, wouldn't they?

1:14:33 Caller No, I wouldn't. I, part of me is going to, I feel like right now, part of me is going to love him forever.

1:14:40 Drew First one, 19, I went through all this together. I mean, think about that. You know, it's going to be hard for me.

1:14:45 Nicole Sullivan Could they take some time to date now? I mean, she's of that age or you really shouldn't be dating him anyway.

1:14:50 Caller That was one of the big things that we split over because we didn't want to miss growing up and end up at 40 acting like 19-year-old.

1:14:59 Drew This is what you've got to do.

1:15:01 Nicole Sullivan What a smart girl you are, first of all. You have your stuff together. Really, you do. You just sound totally with it.

1:15:08 Drew Remarkable. Very courageous. And the instinct you're having is that this isn't the right guy for you, truly, and the only way you're going to confirm that and really move on is by going out and dating and forming other relationships and doing the normal kinds of social development that needs to happen. You know it needs to happen.

1:15:28 Adam She's all night over the hospital taking the snapshot with the dead feet and stuff.

1:15:31 Drew No, or she over all this stuff. It's going to be very hard for her to let go of this relationship.

1:15:34 Adam Hospital's idea, huh?

1:15:36 Drew Yeah, people do that kind of thing now.

1:15:37 Adam The hospital says? How about a shot?

1:15:39 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, you could take a year and date him or date other people. I mean, neither one of you is going to go anywhere. Neither one of you is going to get remarried in a year or two, you know, take some time.

1:15:49 Adam Here's the deal. This thing's over. You might as well do it sooner than faster. It's already dragged out a number of months, a number of years. We all know where this is going to be a year from now. It'll be gone. Now you can take 11 months to do that or you can just do it tomorrow. You just got to do it tomorrow. We've all we've all been through it. Still not over the picture thing. Not over it. The hospital brought that up.

1:16:12 Nicole Sullivan Hang in there, Sean.

1:16:13 Drew The social workers and doctors probably.

1:16:18 Adam Drew, have you ever do that?

1:16:20 Caller No pictures of them?

1:16:22 Nicole Sullivan I'm totally with the whole thing. I totally get it.

1:16:24 Caller The pictures.

1:16:26 Nicole Sullivan When are you going to want to look at them again? Like, yeah.

1:16:28 Adam Yeah.

1:16:29 Caller Yeah.

1:16:30 Adam It's like you show them how old they make sense.

1:16:33 Nicole Sullivan If you don't make sense, you know, you just take pictures.

1:16:36 Adam Helped her. All right. Well, possibly we'll take ourselves a little break. Nicole Sullivan is here tonight for Matt TV. And we'll be back after this.

1:16:58 Caller You're listening to Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio, 100.7 above.

1:17:13 Adam Hang in the door, yes.

1:17:14 Nicole Sullivan Oh, hang in the door.

1:17:16 Adam Hey, it's...

1:17:16 Nicole Sullivan I thought it was sort of sexual.

1:17:20 Adam It's Loveline, I'm Adam Carolla. That is the sage over there, Dr. Drew. 1-800-LOVE-191 is the phone number. Nicole Sullivan is our guest tonight from MADD TV. Saturday, 11 o'clock, Fox, yesternight.

1:17:34 Drew Did you bring your cell phone tonight?

1:17:35 Adam Yeah, I did.

1:17:36 Drew I feel strangely lost not having had our usual half-hour closing discussion.

1:17:42 Adam Drew and I jabber on the cell phone on the ride home on a nightly basis.

1:17:48 Nicole Sullivan Oh, that's adorable.

1:17:50 Adam From the time we get in the car to the time we get out of cell range every evening. And I always think to myself, once in a blue moon, I leave my cell phone at work or something and we can't do it. And we had a guest last night, Dr. Schwartz, who was like a sex therapist. And he had all these ideas about the Venus flytrap position and the one hour orgasm and everything. And he was an interesting guy. He had a few good points. It's generally nonsense. But I kept thinking to myself, and I was going to say it and I forgot to say it. I was just thinking, buddy, you are so lucky. I forgot my cell phone. Because we would be talking about your quack ass all the way home. And Drew, I know you were thinking the same thing.

1:18:35 Drew What was the first thing? Because he called me as soon as we got out.

1:18:39 Adam The only thing Drew hates more than an attorney is a doctor who is a little bit on the shady side. He is a doctor, but you are not quite sure the credentials. Sort of...

1:18:56 Nicole Sullivan From Bali, got his degree there.

1:18:58 Adam He got his degree somewhere. He runs some sort of clinic for awareness. You know, some sort of like one of these nonsense title clinics. I got to say, the guy was interesting. Made a few compelling points.

1:19:11 Drew Nice guy. Yeah.

1:19:12 Adam Don't trust a man in his 50s. It's that wrapped up in satisfying a woman. And I think, Drew, you felt the same way? I said it last night. It basically summed up Drew and my lazy approach to relationships. Sharing and giving. He brought two big tins of wonderful, expensive chocolate. He talked about how women, when they got to their tumescent period during that time of the month and the population and all that, that he said, give these to your ladies during that period and it will calm them. And we said, oh, that's great. And it took us about three minutes to break into one of them. And I polished, we polished a 110 off while we were sitting there. Yeah, they're great.

1:19:57 Nicole Sullivan What was the point of that? Was it to calm them? Like, I challenged the man to hand me a small ball of chocolate when I'm pre-menstrual.

1:20:05 Drew And this will help me be like, oh, shut up.

1:20:07 Adam You're breed, you're breed, you crave chocolate when you're in the tumescent period.

1:20:13 Nicole Sullivan And we can buy our own chocolate. That's the beauty of the fact that women, are there own cars and their own money?

1:20:18 Drew F with Nicole. When is your period coming?

1:20:20 Nicole Sullivan About a week and a half.

1:20:21 Drew Are you real regular?

1:20:22 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, I'm on the middle.

1:20:23 Drew And in the future, when you schedule Nicole?

1:20:26 Adam Yeah, don't book her around the first week of the month.

1:20:29 Drew The middle of the month only, okay?

1:20:30 Adam Stay away from her then. You know, the thing that never gets old, the mistake I make in every relationship and it's great is, always getting a big blowout with the girlfriend. And then, at a certain point of the argument, she says, you know what, honey, this is my period. This is my period. It's like I'm so, it's so much hormones in me and stuff. This is my period. So I go, all right, noted. Next month, same time comes around, get into the blowout, this time I'd be in a punch. Honey, honey, I got the answer here. You know where I am? It's your period. No, no. You can't bring up the period. Only they can bring up the period.

1:21:06 Nicole Sullivan I can make fun of my mother, you can't make fun of my mother.

1:21:08 Adam Here's the deal. You can bring up the period when they're not on the period, when you don't need to bring it up, but you can not bring it up during the period.

1:21:16 Drew Actually, not only will they get enraged about it, it's dismissed as a potential contributing factor.

1:21:22 Adam Yes.

1:21:22 Nicole Sullivan At all. Yeah.

1:21:23 Drew Now that you brought it up.

1:21:24 Adam Man, it's great. It's like, honey, remember last month you brought the period? That was different.

1:21:29 Nicole Sullivan This is my favorite quote of my sister, can I curse while they bleep it? Yeah.

1:21:32 Drew Well, are you ready Anderson? Here it comes.

1:21:34 Nicole Sullivan Yeah. My sister's on the pill, she started going on the pill and she was getting very cranky and it wasn't suiting her well and her boyfriend after like a month or two, finally said, you know, listen, maybe, maybe the fact, did you think it's the pill that's upsetting you so much? She said, no, the pill just makes it clear what an asshole you are. Like the magic pill that was like, now I can see you for what you are. It has nothing to do with the hormones. I just see you.

1:22:00 Drew It's good.

1:22:01 Adam It brings everything into focus.

1:22:02 Drew I can see the male aspect.

1:22:05 Adam Rachel?

1:22:06 Hi.

1:22:07 Adam You're 28?

1:22:08 Caller Yep. Hi, Adam.

1:22:09 Adam What's up? What's up?

1:22:10 Caller Hi, Nicole.

1:22:11 Adam Hi.

1:22:11 Caller I love the show Loveline. Sorry, I don't watch mad TV because...

1:22:16 Drew This guy is an asshole.

1:22:17 Caller No, I don't have a TV. Sorry.

1:22:19 Drew What's up, Rachel?

1:22:20 Caller Okay. Whenever I'm making out with my boyfriend and he plays with my nipples, like at all, either with his mouth or his hands, I get really thirsty.

1:22:29 Drew Are you breathing harder through your mouth?

1:22:31 Caller Well, not necessarily at that point. No.

1:22:34 Drew Do you feel any sort of contraction in your pelvic area? No.

1:22:40 Caller I just have a profound thirst. I'm wondering if it's psychological or if that would kind of make sense.

1:22:45 Adam Do you not have a TV by choice?

1:22:49 Caller I don't know if it's a choice, really.

1:22:51 Adam Are you just poor?

1:22:53 Caller Kind of poor. I don't know. I just haven't thought about buying one. Should I?

1:22:56 Adam No.

1:22:57 Caller I like the radio.

1:22:58 Caller Yeah, I like your show.

1:22:59 Adam Good times, good times.

1:23:01 Drew Again, we talked a little bit about this last night, but the nipple stimulation releases oxytocin sometimes. And that could have... I'm trying to figure out that physiology to see how it would cause it. Is it very rapid, immediate, that the thirst develops?

1:23:17 Caller Yeah.

1:23:17 Drew I can imagine.

1:23:18 Caller Pretty quickly. And it's like severe sometimes.

1:23:21 Adam What else would make you thirsty, Drew, in that way, besides sweating or dehydration? You know, is there any other thing?

1:23:30 Drew Yeah. There's something called anticholinergic kinds of side effects of medication that make for thirst. And again, I'm trying to put this all together in some sort of imaginative way. I'm not coming up with anything particularly. Are you not on medication?

1:23:43 Caller Well, birth control pills and Allegra for allergies.

1:23:49 Drew Not Allegra D.

1:23:50 Adam Would Allegra dry up?

1:23:52 Drew It can a little bit, but not suddenly with just nipple play.

1:23:55 Caller Yeah, I'm just surprised I've never heard anyone with this question before.

1:23:59 Nicole Sullivan Is it a turn on to you as well?

1:24:01 Caller Well, I like it when he does it. The thirst isn't necessarily...

1:24:04 Drew But what else do you experience besides the thirst?

1:24:09 Caller Let's see, well, it's pleasurable.

1:24:12 Drew Is there arousal just throughout your body?

1:24:14 Caller Yeah, yeah, throughout.

1:24:16 Caller I wouldn't say, I mean, I don't know what it feels like to be anyone else, but I would say it's really severe or really mild. It's probably about normal.

1:24:25 Drew Do you feel more bonded to him in any way? Do you feel close to him at that moment?

1:24:30 Caller Yeah, a little bit. It's not like a special day between the two of us.

1:24:32 Adam Well, he's twisting her nipples like a professional wrestler. Of course, there's some closeness there.

1:24:38 Drew I'm just trying to explore this, but I can't specifically explain it. Again, the thing that comes to mind is oxytocin.

1:24:44 Adam Are you thirsty or are you dry in the mouth? I don't know if Drew sort of touched on that.

1:24:49 Caller No, not dry in the mouth, really just thirsty.

1:24:52 Nicole Sullivan That's really meat.

1:24:53 Adam You drink.

1:24:54 Nicole Sullivan Not for you, for me to listen to it.

1:24:56 Adam Drink a whole glass of water, right?

1:24:58 Caller Yeah, then usually I stop.

1:24:59 Drew It clearly is some sort of, it's the hypothalamus that regulates thirst, and clearly something you're releasing is stimulating that part of the brain. True.

1:25:10 Adam All right, we can't figure this one out. It's interesting. I was thinking about water, and I realized-

1:25:14 Drew No, I'm thirsty.

1:25:15 Adam Yeah, I'm thirsty too. And other people will tell you how much water you should be drinking.

1:25:20 Drew Yeah, Nicole was just going on about that. You gotta have clear urine.

1:25:23 Adam They always seem to be about a couple of gallons heavy.

1:25:27 Drew Yes.

1:25:27 Adam In my-

1:25:29 Nicole Sullivan Is it really? Do we exaggerate how much water we actually need?

1:25:32 Adam Well, let me just say, put it this way, in my opinion. Whenever I hear these medical folk or dieticians talking about what the human body needs, it's like, well, you should drink 11 gallons of water a day. And you should eat 14 servings of fruits and vegetables every day. And I think to myself, whatever it is they tell me. They literally say like 8 glasses of water, 10 glasses of water, and 7 servings of fruit and or vegetable every day. And I always think, I don't know a goddamn person that does that. I don't know the person that does that. I imagine there's one or two.

1:26:14 Caller I do part of it.

1:26:15 Nicole Sullivan But I'm unlike most actresses. Most actresses eat very well. They eat too little. They don't eat enough food. But I mean, I'm like the fatty McFaddy of my friends. Like I eat and I drink and I drink half the water and I drink Diet Coke. Most of the actors don't even touch soda. They don't touch coffee. Yeah, the skin, the hair, whatever.

1:26:35 Adam I mean, I. Everyone I know.

1:26:37 Drew Yeah, that's you and me. We're always constantly worried about these things, aren't we?

1:26:41 Nicole Sullivan Yeah.

1:26:41 Drew Constantly.

1:26:42 Adam We eat the chocolate that our guests bring us.

1:26:44 Nicole Sullivan That was hilarious.

1:26:45 Adam We drink coffee all night and it seemed to be the same as anybody else.

1:26:50 Caller So, also, I think it's BS.

1:26:52 Nicole Sullivan If you're thirsty, other than the woman's nipple issue with the thirst, if you're thirsty, then that already means you're dehydrated. Is that a myth too?

1:27:01 Adam Doesn't that mean it's time to drink water?

1:27:03 Drew Thirst is a complex neurologic mechanism. It can be completely separate from your volume status. And that's what I think is going on with this thing. This is a hormone released by the pituitary that's activating that part of our brain.

1:27:16 Caller All right.

1:27:17 Adam Let's take ourselves a little break. Drew, you want to urinate together?

1:27:20 Drew Yes.

1:27:20 Nicole Sullivan I always say I want to come in with a list of questions for you, Dr. Drew. Every time I'm here, I'm like, Oh, what was that thing I thought of last month that I wanted to know about the body? I'm going to do that next week.

1:27:28 Adam Write them down. And like I said, we'll book you when you're not on the rag. We know now.

1:27:35 Drew That's the pre-rag.

1:27:37 Nicole Sullivan The pre-rag is fine for me. The pre-rag is.

1:27:39 Adam Post-rag booking.

1:27:40 Caller That's fine.

1:27:41 Adam You come in with your list of questions and we'll be happy to answer them. We'll be back with Nicole Sullivan after this.

1:27:47 Caller Loveline.

1:27:48 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:28:07 Caller You're listening to Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio. 100.7 The Buzz.

1:28:13 Caller Arby's nose, now that you've grown up.

1:28:17 Drew Professional wrestlers, turning politicians, yep.

1:28:19 Caller Resurgence of disco, yep.

1:28:21 Adam Everything Dr. Drew over there, Nicole Sullivan, across from us from MADtv. Sixth season, still going strong, although she only has one more season before she's off to her big ABC prime time.

1:28:33 Nicole Sullivan Two more weeks, actually. Two more weeks.

1:28:35 Adam That's when it airs?

1:28:37 Nicole Sullivan No, two more weeks is all I have left on MAD. I mean, the shows will run for a while because we pre-taped.

1:28:42 Drew You keep saying a year or something.

1:28:44 Adam Well, well, she said, well, I actually, I think Nicole said this was her last season or her last year, I think she said, and I just turned it into 12 months. It's the same. It's, you know, 12 days. Same as 12 months. So this will be your last year, your last season on MADtv. And then it's, have you done the pilot for the ABC?

1:29:05 Nicole Sullivan I shot the pilot, it's called Me and My Needs. And hopefully it'll be on ABC and Tuesdays in the fall.

1:29:12 Adam How did the pilot work?

1:29:13 Nicole Sullivan It went well. I think it's pretty funny.

1:29:15 Adam And you'll do a bunch of episodes you think fall, so it's not a replacement show.

1:29:19 Nicole Sullivan I don't think so. I think it's a fall show.

1:29:20 Adam Oh, that's good. I guess that's good, right?

1:29:23 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, there's pluses and minuses.

1:29:25 Adam But it's better to be in the new fall.

1:29:26 Nicole Sullivan I'd like that.

1:29:27 Adam You know what, I swear to Christ, you know what I would pay $1,000 for? Just a big, long reel of coming this fall, the ABC, coming this fall, the NBC, CBS, this fall, just from 1975 and on. You know what I mean?

1:29:44 Drew Things you can't even remember.

1:29:45 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:29:45 Nicole Sullivan Being on Fox for six years, like the things that have come and gone in a minute, you know, like, what was it? Ryan Caulfield, Year One, was it have a show like that's a little bit...

1:29:55 Adam How freaky would it be, like, just to go watch some reel from 1979? Patrick Duffy can communicate with dolphins and man from Atlantis. You know, it's like, you'd be watching Joe just going, how high were they? Were they completely coked out? What was going on? Yeah, and I would bring that big, long reel in to every pitch meeting I ever did and go, seriously, folks, you green-lighted this. Yeah, certainly.

1:30:21 Nicole Sullivan Please look condescendingly at me.

1:30:23 Adam Please. I beg of you. Michael?

1:30:27 Caller Yeah.

1:30:28 Adam You're 19.

1:30:29 Caller Yes, I am.

1:30:30 Adam What's up?

1:30:31 Caller I got a question for Nicole.

1:30:33 Nicole Sullivan Hi, Michael.

1:30:34 Caller Hi, how are you?

1:30:35 Caller Good.

1:30:36 Caller I want to know how long you've been doing, what got you started doing my TV? Is it like an audition or?

1:30:42 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, most of the people on the show are from like Second City or Groundlings. Am I hitting the wrong button? Second City or Groundlings or Improv Olympic or one of those schools of improv and stuff like that. And then they sort of got characters together and people came to see their shows. I was 25 and more mini-skirt and had no experience and had no business on the show, basically.

1:31:06 Drew You had no training in improv?

1:31:08 Nicole Sullivan None. I never did any of that stuff.

1:31:09 Drew Are you as shocked by that as I am?

1:31:11 Adam Well, you say improv and it's not improv, but you mean in character sketch.

1:31:17 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, I had never done a character. Like they said, bring five of your characters. I didn't have a character. I had never done stand-up. I had never done anything like that.

1:31:23 Adam It is unusual. Well, I think if you're a good actress and you can do voices and do characters.

1:31:29 Drew You've had acting training, though.

1:31:30 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, I went to school for acting. Sorry, what were you saying, Michael?

1:31:34 Caller Oh, I got something for Adam, too.

1:31:35 Adam Yeah.

1:31:36 Caller What happened to Boo Bill, man?

1:31:38 Adam Oh, I don't know. I get, you know, as tired as you guys are of my nasally drone, I feel the same way with most of my ideas. I'm like a kid. I get some ideas and then I never follow them up. Okay, Michael?

1:31:53 Drew I'm very unsatisfied.

1:31:54 Adam Thank you. Well, here's the thing. And maybe I'll turn this liability into a half-assed compliment, but unlike other radio show hosts who come up with one semi-bad idea and then ride it into the ground, like Rick Dees doing a heiny wine routine for 15 years, I come up with ideas that are semi-humorous and then forget about them.

1:32:19 Drew Five minutes later.

1:32:20 Adam Yeah, I don't write them down and I don't bother with it and I just don't want to be one of those repeat-the-bit guys. And plus it takes energy.

1:32:28 Drew A lot.

1:32:28 Adam That I don't have.

1:32:29 Caller You work very hard.

1:32:30 Nicole Sullivan You shouldn't feel bad.

1:32:31 Drew No, no, no, no, no, no. Quite the contrary.

1:32:34 Caller Oh, really?

1:32:34 Drew That's what you're saying.

1:32:36 Caller Here's.

1:32:37 Caller I was supposed to exploit my bad.

1:32:39 Adam Here's here's my reality. I I'm good enough at this that I can be a lazy and still be mediocre.

1:32:47 Drew Yeah.

1:32:48 Adam That's basically where I am.

1:32:50 Drew Nicole's sort of almost insultingly accepting of your explanation.

1:32:54 Caller Yeah, I got it.

1:32:56 Adam That's a little lofty. But I'm with you on the lazy part. You lost me on the mediocre part of mediocre.

1:33:03 Nicole Sullivan And we started with I'm so good at this. I was pausing.

1:33:06 Adam OK, I mean, seriously, this job, unlike most people who talk for a living, I this job actually is easy for me. I don't, you know, I can talk.

1:33:17 Nicole Sullivan And I'm going to not give you a comment.

1:33:18 Adam But I'm lazy.

1:33:19 Nicole Sullivan But I I don't know Adam particularly well for the people out there. But I'm friendly with them. We run similar circles. But you are by far like I work with comedians all the time and talk to them. I mean, you are like top three quickest people I've ever talked to. You're very fast. You really are very good. And so it is I'm agreeing with you that it is your skill and not your effort.

1:33:40 Adam And a lot of a lot of guys would work hard and try to be the best. Not me. You have none of that. Why should I? It comes naturally. Why not just be lazy and get by? Thank you. Let that be a lesson to all the young people listening. Vivian? Yes? You're 29. What's up?

1:33:59 Caller 29. I have a boyfriend 10 years older than me, scared to death of the vibrator. I mean, not me going after him, but he has an aversion.

1:34:11 Drew I understand it's to bring it in to your...

1:34:13 Caller Yes.

1:34:14 Drew How about you using it by yourself?

1:34:16 Caller I have, and he says, I don't want to hear about that.

1:34:20 Drew Because he's afraid it's going to be sort of outdone by it?

1:34:23 Caller I guess.

1:34:23 Drew Made useless? Rendered obsolete?

1:34:26 Adam You guys fall into two categories, basically, and I know you'll agree with this, Drew. They're the guys who are constantly trying to exploit a woman's sexuality. Come on, baby, let me film us. Let me film us. This is cool. Let's get your friend in here. And then the ones who are trying to shut it down. Like, don't do this. Don't wear that. Don't wear that. No, no, no, no. Don't tell me about this.

1:34:46 Caller Okay, then who is he?

1:34:47 Caller He does both.

1:34:48 Adam He wants to film you, but he doesn't want to use it.

1:34:50 Caller Because I have extremely large breasts. He wants me to cover up before I go out. Right. Okay. And I used to be fairly frisky. I mean, actually pretty perverse.

1:35:03 Drew What does that mean?

1:35:05 Caller Well, I like domination and that kind of thing.

1:35:08 Adam And how big are your breasts?

1:35:10 Caller Like a triple D.

1:35:12 Caller Holy cow.

1:35:13 Adam Yeah.

1:35:14 Caller I have back pain all the time.

1:35:16 Caller Bouncy, bouncy.

1:35:17 Adam My front is starting to hurt. Is it a big girl?

1:35:21 Caller So, I don't know.

1:35:21 Caller I've talked to him about it.

1:35:23 Adam How big are you?

1:35:24 Caller How big are you?

1:35:26 Caller God, I don't know.

1:35:26 Caller I'm 5'5.

1:35:28 Adam Oh, bad when they start with the honey. Go ahead.

1:35:31 Caller Bad when they start...

1:35:31 Caller I am...

1:35:32 Caller Well, I'm chubby.

1:35:33 Caller I'm a big woman.

1:35:34 Caller But I have big boobs and hips.

1:35:36 Adam I'm hip to that part. And, you know, there's nothing more comical than a big gal stuffed into that dominatrix outfit, though. It's like Rosie O'Donnell in... Oh, God, yes... .Escape the Paradise, or whatever that piece of ass was she did. Escape the Eden, whatever that was.

1:35:55 Nicole Sullivan I've got an idea. Okay. Is your vibrator shaped like an actual penis?

1:36:00 Caller It's blue, though, you know?

1:36:02 Nicole Sullivan Yeah, but honestly, I think that upsets some guys. Because it looks like, I actually had a friend of mine who told me this once. They don't like it. Like, it looks like a penis. So it's like, it's you, except it's better. Like, it's more fun.

1:36:14 Drew It's another guy in the room.

1:36:15 Nicole Sullivan Can you, yeah.

1:36:16 Drew There's another penis here.

1:36:17 Nicole Sullivan And yeah, and often we, yeah, okay. So maybe go to the store and get a vibrator that doesn't look like a penis. So there's all kinds of fun little, you know.

1:36:24 Adam Yeah, get one that looks like a...

1:36:25 Nicole Sullivan You know, you buy Dominatrix. You obviously know the room a little better than I, but like, go buy something that looks different so you won't feel threatened.

1:36:31 Adam One that looks like a toaster or a microwave.

1:36:34 Nicole Sullivan You don't even like ones with little knobs and there's still plenty of fun stuff.

1:36:37 Adam No, no, no, this guy's an idiot.

1:36:40 Caller Well, you know, I...

1:36:41 Adam This guy's an a-hole.

1:36:42 Caller I can't stand it.

1:36:44 Adam This guy's a mess.

1:36:46 Drew Just because he doesn't...

1:36:46 Adam No, hold on a second.

1:36:48 Drew He thinks she's an a-hole.

1:36:49 Adam No, no, no. She's a mess. That's of course...

1:36:51 Caller Who'd date her?

1:36:53 Adam Do you know what I'm saying? I always talk to Drew when we put him on hold this way, but they can always hear us.

1:36:58 Nicole Sullivan They can because they listen to the radio.

1:36:59 Adam Yeah. No, they listen through the phone. Yeah, but still in my weird fantasy world, they can't hear us. Yeah, we're talking behind their back. Yeah, she's a screwball. Who would date her? Another screwball. Plus this guy. Guys are always worse than the women.

1:37:13 Drew Yeah. So he's her...

1:37:15 Adam Yeah, it's screwed up.

1:37:16 Drew It's the business of him wanting to film her. Yeah.

1:37:19 Adam Vivian?

1:37:20 Caller Yes?

1:37:21 Adam Can you get away from this guy? I don't trust him.

1:37:23 Caller You don't trust him?

1:37:24 Adam What's he do for a living?

1:37:27 Caller He works in Seattle as a sheet metal worker. No.

1:37:31 Caller Everybody says that.

1:37:32 Adam No. It works around metal. That's all you need to know.

1:37:36 Drew This is a mess. That's sort of the bottom of the metal working tonal pole, too.

1:37:39 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Worse than welder. Sheet metal. It's a disaster, this guy.

1:37:45 Nicole Sullivan She's laughing because she kind of knew that that was the bottom. She wasn't even going to confirm it.

1:37:49 Adam How many times have I said guys who work around metal are a mess?

1:37:53 Drew It can't even count.

1:37:53 Adam Yeah.

1:37:54 Drew And you've never been wrong.

1:37:55 Caller I'm a mess, too.

1:37:56 Adam I know, that's what I was saying. Why would anyone who would date you?

1:37:59 Caller I am in that job, but you know what?

1:38:01 Caller I'm a good mom. I'm a good mom.

1:38:05 Adam Oh.

1:38:05 Caller I don't bring that around my daughter.

1:38:07 Adam Oh, yeah. She'll never know it. She'll be in therapy for the rest of her life.

1:38:10 Caller Oh, please.

1:38:11 Adam Yeah. You have a daughter?

1:38:14 Caller Yes.

1:38:14 Adam Oh, good. At least she can be a lesbian or a stripper or something useful to society.

1:38:17 Nicole Sullivan I feel so silly. I feel so tricked. I was giving her actual vibrator. See, I don't have the instincts that you guys have. Try this.

1:38:24 Caller Taking it out of contact.

1:38:26 Adam All right.

1:38:26 Drew All right.

1:38:26 Adam We got to go find a new man. Find a new guy, though.

1:38:30 Drew I like Nicole.

1:38:31 Adam He wants to fill me. Oh, he doesn't want you to.

1:38:33 Drew Yeah, she's going to find that she's going to find another idiot, too. So what the hell? True.

1:38:38 Adam You're just giving up.

1:38:38 Caller I like that.

1:38:39 Adam Exit the Eden was the name of that Rosie O'Donnell abortion. We'll be back after this.

1:38:46 Caller Hello, this is your radio.

1:39:13 Adam There you go. Nicole Sullivan, everybody. Enjoy her while she lasts on MADtv at 11 o'clock on Saturday nights on Fox. And Nicole, when the ABC sitcom comes out, please come back on. Absolutely. As long as you're not pre-menstrual.

1:39:32 Nicole Sullivan I won't come on the right time of the month with my list of medical questions for Dr. Drew.

1:39:35 Adam And plug, plug, plug away.

1:39:37 Caller Yeah.

1:39:38 Adam Thanks. Good seeing you. Thanks, guys. So until next time, Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:39:47 Caller There you go. Oh, baby.

1:39:51 Caller Oh, gosh.

1:39:54 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkin Stingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Monday, April 23, 2001