Episode 1000754886929

1:02 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. Dr. Drew is in Minneapolis tonight, Drew?

1:19 Drew Yes, sir, here I am.

1:21 Voiceover Dr. Drew, board-certified physician, addiction medicine specialist, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Our guest tonight, legendary porn star, Ron Jeremy.

1:31 It is great to be here. Hi, Dr. Drew, how are you?

1:34 Drew Ron.

1:35 I always see you at airports. It's very special.

1:37 Drew That's the last time we ran into each other.

1:38 You got to be my doctor, I see. I see more than my own doctor, I'm telling you.

1:42 Adam Ron, are they letting you through airports after the tragedy? I'm surprised.

1:46 Do I look kind of Arab?

1:48 Adam Well, you got two things working against you. You got a little Arab thing going and you got a little dice going, too. You could be up to trouble and you may have some Arab blood.

1:59 What's funny is I was on the plane with this lady. They wouldn't let her bring her knitting needles. She was an old lady. She couldn't bring them on the plane.

2:05 Adam Right.

2:06 Thought she was going to knit in Afghan. Oh, come on, folks. Starting with a bang. Sorry about that. I couldn't help that.

2:12 Adam I'm not laughing.

2:13 I'm sorry, Dr. Drew, I just couldn't help that. He would backhand me if he was here, I swear on that one.

2:17 Adam Ron, as you know, last time, well, a couple of things about Ron. First, I have his penis, not his actual penis, but a representation of his penis.

2:27 Drew Latex model.

2:27 Adam A mold of his penis that's in my house. It's now in my attic because my maid found it.

2:33 Did she utilize it?

2:35 Adam I really hope not. Although, actually-

2:37 I need to dust the house with.

2:38 Adam Yeah. It's that weird thing where there's a little language barrier and she didn't confront me on it, but I know I found it sitting out after she'd gone through the place, and I'm sure she's drawn her own horrible conclusions.

2:51 Drew It's like when your mother finds some paraphernalia and she tries it out. Tell her it's yours.

2:54 Adam Never a word has been spoken about it. She thinks awful things about me.

2:58 Just tell her it's yours as I'm old of you.

3:01 Adam Oh, yeah. That's a great idea.

3:02 It would have been mine, but I had to fold mine in half for this one.

3:04 Adam Prototype. There you go. Ron also a big admirer of his work for over the years. I don't mind saying that it makes a difference to me who the guy is in the porn film. A lot of guys won't cop to this. They think it's gay. I like to see a guy with a nice unit on him who knows what he's doing.

3:24 Drew You're gay.

3:25 Adam Yeah. Ron knows what he's doing. Ron's got a couple. I know Ron's work so much. I know he has a patented move, which is a self-guiding move he does with his dork. You know what I'm talking about?

3:36 Yes, yes, it is.

3:36 Adam Yeah. Ron, no one else really does that. Ron does this move, Drew. Now, can you pick? Drew, line your back for a second. Let me just illustrate something here.

3:45 Caller Is he in a hotel room in Minneapolis?

3:47 Drew No, I'm in a radio studio.

3:49 Adam Ron does this move where he lines his junk up there with the lady's junk, and then without any use of his hands. It just slides right in as if there's some sort of vacuum calling at home or something, like a swallow returning to Capistrano.

4:06 Caller Nice comparison.

4:08 Adam Thank you. I'll tell you, Taboo 2, Ron, all over Taboo 2, by the way. That was nasty. Now, what year was that Taboo 2?

4:18 Caller Oh, God. When I did that film, most of the girls I worked with today were sperm. Oh, man. That was 19 years ago, 20 years ago.

4:27 Adam Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, maybe late 70s.

4:30 Caller The song that you're hearing was not the theme song of Taboo 2.

4:33 Adam But it was in it.

4:33 Caller I want to share that with you.

4:35 Adam It was in it.

4:36 Caller It might have been, actually.

4:37 Adam Oh, yeah. Think about it. Oh, yes, he does. They weren't singing about Ron, though, but Ron had a great scene. They had a big orgy at the end in some guy's house. The editing wasn't great because you'd be on one chick, and then you'd be on another chick, and there's this great shot of you just looking around the room, like asking someone for a towel.

4:56 Caller It was nice and skinny back then, too, actually.

4:57 Adam Oh, you look good. Yeah. Very nice.

5:00 Caller Now, they have me under contract with a company called Metro, so I work just for one company, which is kind of nice.

5:06 Adam How many films have you made?

5:08 Caller What? 1,700 over a 23-year period.

5:11 Adam You got the record.

5:12 Caller It's still working.

5:13 Adam You got the record.

5:14 Caller I have the record for the most films ever made on the planet. A guy, Tom Byron, they say we're pretty much neck and neck.

5:20 Adam I don't know. Tom Byron, the guy with the big calves. He's a good kid. I don't know.

5:25 Caller But I think most historians say I'm actually have done more films.

5:29 Adam Yeah. Well, it's certainly much more recognizable than Tom Byron or Tommy Byron as I know him by. And we're going to plug Ron's new documentary, which is out, which I'm very interested in seeing. First off, every time I see, I ask you to get that movie Spank Me, F Me with Minka.

5:47 Caller Yes.

5:48 Adam Ron has done a Minka movie. I've been trying to get hold of this thing and Ron will not help me. Minka was no help.

5:54 Caller She lives in Las Vegas. I have to get hold of that film. I don't even know who distributes it.

5:57 Drew Who is the number one? He asked her for it. She couldn't produce it.

6:00 Adam Well, here's my point. This is what I love about the porn industry. I have the two stars of the film that I've been trying to get my paws on for three years and neither one of them can figure it out. That's what I love about porn.

6:11 Caller It's a strange business, I'm telling you. It's not like mainstream films. They go, oh, let's go get hold of Warner Brothers or Twentieth Century Fox. They have it, you know? It's hard to know what these films are half the time.

6:21 Adam And what title they're under, too.

6:23 Caller Yeah, it's changed.

6:24 Adam I say it's, though it's high time someone did a documentary on Ron's life, because I definitely think you'd be the most interesting character in the industry.

6:34 Caller Well, it starts out when I was a schoolteacher, a licensed master's degree. Oh, that's all in there. Discusses my parents both being veterans in the war. I mean, it's both mom and dad. I mean, it's a lot of interesting stuff. People do find it interesting.

6:46 Adam And how long is it?

6:48 Caller Nine and three quarter inches. Oh, sorry, the documentary. It's an hour and 20 minutes.

6:52 Adam And how explicit is it?

6:55 Caller It's a lot of fun little T&A and fluff, but they really go into a lot of personal stuff and family backgrounds. In fact, this just came out of the LA Weekly, Give It Critics Choice. Both the New York Times and the LA Times and the Village Voice have praised it immensely, so I'm kind of happy.

7:10 Adam Listen, you know, they do documentaries on the women of Afghanistan and the AIDS quill. I did them. Why not do a documentary on something you'd watch anyway?

7:22 Caller You know what I mean?

7:23 Adam Like most documentaries get you to watch crap you didn't want to watch before, except for someone's going to do a documentary on it, even then it can be interesting. This is actually you'd watch and it's a documentary, so I'm there with that.

7:33 Drew Ron, how did you get started in that business?

7:35 Caller I did a lot of theater back in New York first. Then my girlfriend at the time, actually we discussed this, I was on The View. Actually, I actually faced Barbara Walters a couple of days ago. So they asked me the same thing. My girlfriend set a picture at the time to Playgo magazine, 1978, October. So I was a guy next door. A lot of the directors were doing porn or doing mainstream films. So the job market was real tough back in New York. I was doing theater, I got into the union, stage union, equity. And then I did my first adult film back in 1978, because I was this starving actor. I quit teaching and I wanted to perform. And back then, it was on film. So you might work ten days as an actor and then one day sex. Oh really? It was Bad Girls, Ecstasy Girls, Amanda by Night, Co-ed Fever, Fascination, Roommates, Cafe Flesh. These were all films that were shot on film.

8:20 Adam Cafe Flesh, you were in that?

8:21 Caller No, but I'm saying these are films of that era, which had a lot of story. They were not like they are made today.

8:29 Drew That's kind of what Boogie Nights was about, right?

8:30 Caller Yes, exactly what it's about. Then when Walker went video, it went to the homes. A lot of more younger couples would watch it, but then in the process, it started to shoot directly on video. Then you had the amateurs, the couple next door, the internet. So now basically a lot of the story lines are gone. Some people are still trying to do it. Metro tries to do it, but basically a lot of story lines are gone. So it's just a matter of, hi, here's a cup of coffee. Eat this. There's, you know. Right.

8:53 Adam Well, now why, why that being said?

8:55 Drew Ron, delicate sensibilities, Adam, are offended by the direction that pornography is taking.

8:59 Adam Yes.

9:00 Caller Well, I walked right into that one, didn't I?

9:02 Adam They've soiled his art. Well, why stay with it then? I mean, do you need the money? No, for you now, right now. I mean now, tonight. Do you want the money?

9:13 Caller Do you need it? I'm doing a decent amount of mainstream. Like I know as I'm always glad that I got medical benefits under the Screen Actors Guild because I'm getting enough work in mainstream. I'm actually in the film Urine 2 actually that was done a long time ago.

9:24 Adam I still don't remember that.

9:26 Caller I think it was starring Tippi Hedgen, the writer.

9:29 Adam I know my ass hurts, but that's all I remember about Working of Run.

9:32 Caller Not that kind of movie. It was a regular movie.

9:33 Adam Well, but let me.

9:35 Caller It's too much fun to quit right now. I mean, I was already figured if I was getting enough work in the mainstream, I would quit.

9:39 Adam But you do not want to quit because you're Cal Ripken Jr. I like to be current. You know what I mean? A, you get a fresh crop of young Tang coming down the pike every 10 minutes. I mean, that's one perk. The other is, are you scared that when you drop out, that'll be it? I mean, like retiring.

9:59 Caller I'll never get nooky the rest of my life.

10:01 Adam Well, no, I don't mean nooky. I just mean like a lot of guys, like if you just drew a sports analogy. It's exciting. You like to be in front of the camera.

10:08 Caller I like being the fact that this might sound kind of corny, but I'm 48. I always was told by guys when you get into your 50s, Dr. Drew probably can answer this better, that the ability to get a lift off might not be as easy. I've never taken Viagra. A lot of guys do. LA Times did an article on that, that I don't take it. I just want to keep doing it until it comes to a part where it becomes too difficult, which I will want to stop. Why make a fool of myself?

10:30 Adam Then you take Viagra.

10:31 Caller Well, then I'll quit and take Viagra in my own personal life. Right now, Dr. Drew, there's not really any bad effect. I've heard that people could see blue or if they have a heart condition. Have you ever heard anything bad about Viagra?

10:42 Drew Well, we don't know. We don't know what happens to healthy people on it because it's not been studied. We know that people that have medical causes of erectile dysfunction, it looks fine except for the heart issue.

10:52 Caller So many guys in porn use it. In fact, it's changing the face of porn because you know, Adam, that over the years you see a lot of the same male faces. Sure. Whereas now with Viagra, any guy could be a porn star. So you get a young, cute kid and he takes Viagra and bingo, he does the scene.

11:06 Adam Well, you know, that is interesting because before Viagra, I mean, minus Viagra, what percentage of the male population can maintain interaction and have an orgasm with a bunch of guys standing around eating donuts with duct tape on their belts?

11:21 Caller Small group.

11:21 Adam A very small percentage, but that number has now been tripled.

11:25 Caller Of course, anybody could do it now. Now anybody could do it. Well, I've seen guys who are nervous, don't think they could do it. Boom, take a pill, there it is, bingo. I'm telling you, it's just amazing. I've seen it work.

11:37 Adam Now you know what chicks who haven't got boob jobs feel like.

11:41 Caller Thank you. Let's heal some babies.

11:43 Adam All right, let's heal some babies. Where can we find this movie?

11:47 Caller It's opening up tomorrow night, Friday night, in Los Angeles in New York. Here it's going to be at the Newark Theatre, which is on Santa Monica Boulevard in the 405. There are two shows tomorrow, 7.30 and 9.30, actually 9.40. And it's called Point Star, The Legend of Me, Ron Jeremy. And it's opening up in New York City at the Cinema Village, also Friday night.

12:06 Adam I was saying last night, are your parents alive?

12:09 Caller My dad is, yeah.

12:10 Adam Now he sees this, is he proud, is he happy?

12:13 Caller You know, it's funny, the notoriety has been kind of fun. You know, like, they'll be at a restaurant having dinner with the whole family, and the chef comes out and says, Ron Jeremy, give me an autograph, it's on the house. They see that even the nieces, the grandkids, they'll see me in a music video, like I'm the hero of my niece, because I was in the Kid Rock video, and all the kids in class love Kid Rocks. I mean, like, not from the adult stuff necessarily, but the other perks I've had. I have shirts that are marketable, I have rolling paper, which is now on the market.

12:42 Adam Oh, you do?

12:42 Caller Look at this. Here, take it. It's yours.

12:44 Adam Wait a minute.

12:44 Caller Look at that. Is that funny?

12:45 Adam I'm freaking about rolling paper.

12:47 Caller That's in smoke shops all over America right now.

12:49 Adam How about belly wipes? That's what you should have come out with.

12:52 Caller I'm even on a bong that a company is manufacturing right now.

12:57 Adam Let's save the baby. All right.

12:59 Caller Is that for that wild?

13:00 Adam Yeah. Can I keep this?

13:01 Caller Yeah. Bob Marley's company makes that.

13:04 Adam Jesus Christ.

13:06 Caller Look at this.

13:06 Adam Yeah. I'm looking at this. There's rolling papers, a big penis on it, and there's a thousand pictures of Ron. If you were high and looked at this, your head would explode. I think that's dangerous. Pictures of Ron's head on the papers.

13:19 Caller Different characters over the years in movies.

13:21 Adam Look out, zigzag man. All right. Let's talk to Rogers 33. Roger. Roger. All right. Drew, I'm going to pick another call.

13:33 Drew Go five.

13:35 Adam Drew, I told you I was going to pick. Drew, didn't I say I was going to pick another call? Kelly.

13:41 Hey.

13:42 Adam You're 23?

13:43 Caller Yes.

13:44 Adam What's up?

13:45 Caller First of all, I wanted to say Ron is the man. Second of all, I wanted to say I love you guys.

13:52 Adam Thanks.

13:52 Caller I love you and Drew, seriously.

13:54 Adam Are you drunk or high or what's up?

13:56 Caller No. Come on.

13:58 Adam Okay.

13:59 Caller I'm the man, but she loves you guys.

14:01 Adam Yeah.

14:03 Caller Do you like me?

14:05 Caller I like Ron. You're right up there with Scott and Napoleon.

14:09 Caller Okay. It's interesting.

14:13 Adam You're a big fan of Napoleon?

14:15 Caller Oh, yeah. He was hot.

14:16 Adam Really?

14:17 Caller Yeah.

14:18 Adam Do you know what he did for a living?

14:22 Caller Um, he was probably a porn star.

14:24 Adam All right. Go ahead there, she can call.

14:26 Caller So anyhow, I had anal sex for the first time last night. And dear Lord, today I'm really paying for it because my asshole is so hurting and it's bleeding and I can't take a crap. And I'm like wondering, is this something that's normal? Does it, will it go away or?

14:49 Caller Was this your first time?

14:50 Caller Yes.

14:51 Caller For sure.

14:52 Adam Well, I have an important question. Where did you go to finishing school?

14:58 Caller What?

15:00 Caller You mean the dialogue you're talking about.

15:01 Adam My asshole is on fire and the stool is red like the devil. How freaky is Kelly? Is she a little scary sounding?

15:14 Caller Didn't the Pogan blow his bone apart?

15:19 Adam You know what I love about all Jews? They all have a corny sense of humor. Even the porn stars do. Remember we had Rabbi Schmooley in here? The guy is a goddamn Rabbi. He cracks more horrible jokes an hour than any coyum ever does.

15:33 Caller I got a bunch. Dr. Drew, the advice for her would be, could she sit on ice cubes? What does a girl do? Like Sam Kenison used to have a joke. If a girl was sore from anal sex, well honey, can I get you a band-aid or something? I mean that was just a joke. What actually could she do? Would it be like to sit on ice cubes?

15:49 Drew No, you get some anusol cream.

15:51 Caller That will help it out. I have a second question.

15:53 Adam No, shut up and let us in. Can I answer your first one? Kelly, you must be so hot.

15:59 Caller Listen to me.

16:00 Adam Are you hot?

16:01 Caller Yes, of course I am.

16:02 Adam You gotta be because you're just such a pain in the ass.

16:05 Caller Listen to me.

16:06 Adam No, shut up. Okay. I'm done with you.

16:08 Caller Did it feel, I wonder if it felt good that she enjoyed the anal sex?

16:11 Drew I don't know. Anusol cream, hot bath, and if it keeps bleeding, she has to go to the hospital. Because this can be quite serious. Bleeding can be breasty. You can bleed to death from this.

16:19 Caller I can see it being dangerous. I mean, guys should be gentle when it's a girl's first time.

16:23 Drew Ron Jeremy is telling you that.

16:24 Caller What kind of lube do you like there, Ron? That's actually something I'm pretty versed in. Well, hospitals seem to like KY a lot. I like AstroGlide. Years ago, I used to use Abilene, believe it or not, which is like a makeup remover, but it was good. That new stuff, ICE, or A1, it's called, whatever.

16:41 Adam That's steak sauce.

16:42 Caller I find, no. I find, Dr. Drew, what I've found, when a girl is doing her first one and they're a little bit nervous and stuff, always make it where the gravity works with you, not against you. I love these first time directors when a girl said she's a little afraid of making a bit of a mess and they'd have her do the girl on top position. That's ridiculous. You go with gravity. You let her put her elbows to the ground and her rear end propped way up in the air. It's the highest gravity, highest form of gravity, up in the hill. And the guy goes straight down. And it goes very slow and lets the girl do the moving, not the guy. Let the girl do the movement. And I find that they go little itty bitty little strokes that could work out okay. For a first time.

17:19 Adam How much of that's going on in porn these days?

17:22 Caller It's big. Europe. It's huge in Europe. I mean, because of the European influence, and since it seems to sell so well, that they try to have every movie at least some of that in there.

17:30 Drew Do you ever think about what that is? What motivates people to do that, Ron?

17:35 Caller I have always seen it as a European influence. I mean, basically an American movie made today...

17:39 Drew It's not like holding your pinky out when you hold a teacup. I mean, there must be some sort of powerful drive to do that.

17:44 Caller On the behalf of the consumer?

17:46 Drew The male. The man.

17:47 Adam Why is that so in today? Philosophically, forget about porn. What is the male's unrelenting drive toward that part of a female?

17:56 Caller Maybe because it's tighter. Maybe because after the woman's had a child, maybe it's tighter, Dr. Drew.

18:00 Drew No, these are young guys are into it.

18:03 Caller I wish I knew. When I'm in Europe and I've done films over there, I see these young guys much more than here in America who really, really like that and I don't understand Italian guys, Greek guys. I'm saying this to be serious. It's not a joke. If a Greek guy will admit it, they really like. I've known, Dr. Drew, this is a true story. There's no lie. I live in Queens. I'm born and raised in Queens and in a story, it was a large Greek population. A lot of the girls there would want to save their husbands the cherry. They wouldn't have vaginal sex to their battery.

18:31 Drew We hear that a lot.

18:32 Caller But they would do the anal sex. So I can imagine on a honeymoon night, the girl says to the husband, I have the good news and the bad news. I saved my cherry for you. Great, then 100 sailors up my quayster. What? Yeah, I'm a virgin. As bizarre as that is. Your husband is going to like to hear this.

18:48 Adam Write that down by the way, the 100 sailors up my quayster. That could be number 751 for you. Hey, Sean?

18:57 Yeah.

18:57 Adam You're 30?

18:59 Caller Yeah, I'm calling from San Jose. Is this Adam?

19:01 Adam Yeah.

19:02 Caller Dude, you're real. I have a question for Ron.

19:05 All right.

19:06 Caller Okay. I wanted to know what Ron thinks of Racko Cifredi.

19:10 Caller He is a perfect example of a guy who just loves the back door also. He's Italian. He's a good guy. Again, he's good. He's a very good performer. He's probably the king of Europe. He's the best-known performer out of Europe.

19:21 Adam Is he big out here?

19:23 Caller He's actually pretty well-known here too. He's come out here to do some films. We're similar as far as size. I think I'm a little longer. He's a little thicker. That matters. He's thin. He's in great shape. He's a very good-looking guy. He's doing it for years. He produces his own stuff.

19:38 Caller I can't believe Adam doesn't know this guy.

19:41 Caller Adam knows who he is. Adam knows Rocko.

19:43 Adam No. I would recognize his penis, I'm sure.

19:46 Caller No. You would definitely recognize his films though, because he gets in and does some pretty extreme stuff.

19:51 Adam Well, let me tell you something.

19:52 Caller The European stuff is stronger. I mean, it's interesting too. As I said on Love Lines years ago, that Dr. Drew said, in Europe, the men make the choices, and the scenes are a little rougher, whereas in America, the girls make the choices.

20:04 Drew What do you mean, the choices?

20:05 Caller The men can choose the girls they work with in Europe. In America, the girl chooses the guys. A girl can replace any guy in any set here in America. In Europe, a man can replace a woman on a set. That's a true story. And the scenes are always rougher and stronger. In fact, in Europe, they call our movies white bread, because they're just so tame.

20:21 Drew What do you mean stronger? What does that mean?

20:23 Caller Nastier anal scenes, more, you know, like Rocko, a little more spitting. They do that here too in some movies.

20:28 Adam I wanted to bring that up.

20:28 Caller A little more spitting, smacking. You see that more gaping, and they use that out of Europe.

20:34 Adam Look, I don't want to appear to be old fashioned, but the long stream of saliva onto the dork. What am I supposed to do with that sexually?

20:43 Caller Rocko's specialty is doing the saliva line right into the gape.

20:47 Adam Not a huge fan. Not a fan of that. Not a fan of that.

20:50 Caller My friends always ask me that, what's the great thing about the inside of a girl's colon that people like to have that gape? I never could figure that out either, but it seems to be a draw. I don't know.

20:58 Adam Yeah, I think I actually do know this guy. What this guy is, he's basically a proctologist with a saliva problem. I mean, this guy opens these women up like a can of corn, and then he does this long saliva drip.

21:13 Caller He does his favorite shot.

21:15 Adam It's repugnant, though.

21:16 Caller He does the freeze spray. He doesn't have his box cutters.

21:17 Adam He kicks this guinea right in the nuts. Well, what I'm saying is, you ever see a guy like-

21:21 Drew You break your stride, Adam.

21:23 Adam Absolutely. You know when you're like on a school yard and there'd be that one kid who'd do that long string of saliva and let it hang down his mouth?

21:29 Caller A lungy. He was called a lungy.

21:30 Adam Yeah, and then he'd suck it back out. And it was like, you'd just look at it and you go, Jesus Christ, I can't eat now. That's disgusting. Why do I gotta see that with the guy's pants down while I'm beating off?

21:40 Caller The guy who's on the phone, what's the name of the guy on the phone?

21:41 Adam Screw him.

21:42 Caller I mean, you've seen Rocko do that, right Hold on.

21:45 Adam Where is he?

21:46 Caller Yeah, that's Rocko.

21:47 Adam All right. You kick that Rocko in the nuts when you see him. Tell him it's from me. There's all this spitting and the women spitting and the whole. Drew, there's this whole thing that's going on where it's not even the spit, it's the bridge of saliva that goes from the area to the person's mouth. A woman will be giving a guy oral, she'll pull away and she'll pull away up to 12, 14 inches. I'm not exaggerating.

22:17 Caller I know, they do that. That's true. They do that.

22:19 Adam As far away as you would hold a coffee mug in front of you if you're raising a toast to somebody.

22:24 Caller They do that all the time.

22:25 Adam It's called a stringer. There's this long suspension bridge of saliva between the guy's door and her mouth.

22:29 Caller I don't mind it so much when a girl does it. I just don't like to see a guy with saliva.

22:33 Drew That does what?

22:34 Adam I don't know. Here's what it does.

22:36 Caller It looks like it's such a slobbering oral experience when they do that.

22:40 Adam Here's what it's all about.

22:41 Caller Some guys find that exciting.

22:42 Adam First off, it makes me think of disease. That's the last thing I want to think of when I'm thinking of porn. But here's what's going on in general, and here's what I have problem with, and here's why I'm a little bit old school. They've upped the ante to the point where they've gotten out of sex and just into yuck by up the ante.

22:59 Caller The market is saturated. They have to think of new things to do.

23:01 Adam But my point is, is, my point is, is, okay, I understand that you have to go, you have to keep upping the ante sexually. But when you get beyond sex and now the guy's just on her.

23:15 Caller Yeah.

23:16 Adam That's not sex anymore.

23:18 Caller Again, that's a little more Europe. There's not too much that happens in America.

23:22 Adam It's just because you're new, don't make it sexual.

23:24 Caller Yeah, that's true. You know what I'm saying? I agree with you.

23:27 Adam I'm all right with all the hardcore stuff.

23:30 Caller I'm not a fan of it, but I understand it. And again, urinating is also, you don't see that in too many American movies. That's also European. That's why I call it European footage. European, he's a peon, she's a peon. Sorry, I did it again, guys.

23:41 Drew Sorry, couldn't help that. Sorry, sorry.

23:43 Adam God bless the USA.

23:45 Caller Oh, not again. Sorry, I'm sorry.

23:47 Adam Ron, I want you to think, and I know you get this question asked all the time, but when we come back, I want you to tell me who your favorite starlet to work with, even if it was just one time.

23:56 Caller Tabitha Stevens. I don't even hesitate on that one.

23:59 Adam Really?

23:59 Caller She's also very much featured in my documentary.

24:01 Adam All right.

24:02 Caller She's, we get along great because she's a doll. She does some amount of chemistry and she's just sweet and she really, it's always a turn on when the scene is over and the director says cut, and the girl is going, hold on a minute, mister, because she seems to enjoy it, and she's got such a great shape. She has such a small little, she could be in the business for so many years, she's got a virginal, you know what I mean?

24:19 Adam Yeah, she's hot.

24:21 Caller We get along, we're friends.

24:22 Adam You know what I love about her too is she's one of these people, Tabitha Stevens, who was who was a bewitched Elizabeth Montgomery's daughter and Buffy Davis, I had to figure out later, was in Family Affair.

24:35 Caller And then the names they use.

24:37 Adam And there's Frank James. See, sometimes they don't pick the stars, they pick the secondary. It wasn't Jesse James, it was Frank James.

24:43 Caller Tony Montana, he uses these names.

24:45 Adam Right, right.

24:45 Caller Scarface.

24:46 Adam Yeah. Okay. But this is great radio, Ron. When we come back, we're going to find Ron's third favorite, Starlet.

24:55 Caller I got a list.

24:55 Adam All right. We'll save it because I want to know where Christie Canyon is on that list.

24:59 Caller She's up there.

25:00 Adam Don't give her space away.

25:01 Caller Got it.

25:02 Adam All right. We'll be back with legendary adult film actor, Ron Jeremy, after this.

25:42 Caller Hey, I'm Ken Jordan. And I'm Scott Kirkland, and we are The Crystal Method.

25:45 And you're listening to Loveline with Ace Roccola.

25:48 Adam And the brilliant Dr. Drew. PSU is phone number 1-800-LOV- Ron Jeremy is our guest tonight. Legendary adult film actor, probably, I would say, the most recognizable face in porn. But male or female at this point, quite frankly, because women get hot, but they burn bright, but they burn fast.

26:13 Caller Men's careers last a lot longer. Women can make the big bucks. The girls, I think it was Jenna Jamieson said on a late night talk show, she'd already put in a few million away in the bank.

26:22 Adam Really?

26:22 Caller She said it. She's been in business only like five, six years. I mean, the girls can make a contract girl, like girls who work for Metro contracts, they can make from 100,000 to a quarter million a year. And the average guy can make 30,000 to 40,000 a year.

26:34 Adam That's it. Really?

26:35 Caller Yeah.

26:36 Adam I mean, unless you're-

26:36 Caller No lie. And a contract girl maybe makes 60,000 a year for 6 to 10 scenes. She's making from 6 to 10,000 in the movie. The guy that's working with her is making 300 a scene or 400 a scene. Wow. Maybe five or six of his known actor. Maybe a couple hundred bucks with some multiple partners. I'm telling you, the difference is amazing. So guys have to work 20 years to make the same thing a girl makes in four.

26:57 Adam Now what about you? I mean, will people give you a few bucks to get your name on the package?

27:03 Caller My big draws on the road is doing the autographs and representing a company like Metro on the road at video stores, nightclubs, topless clubs, doing a comedy show.

27:11 Adam Also, you're speaking to youth groups.

27:13 Caller That too, college groups. Now, it's all the marketing, these rolling papers, the t-shirts. My name is on point star t-shirts. So that kind of stuff is what it adds up and the directing adds up. But acting itself, no, and porn, no. The mainstream stuff has paid better.

27:28 Adam Well, speaking of porn star, the legend of Ron Jeremy, porn star is the name of the film. It is out at the New Art in LA. It's starting tomorrow night and also in New York, and it's a documentary. Does it start on you early in life and just go all the way through to present?

27:46 Caller Well, really, who looks really good is my dad who's in it. And he did some, he shot with his bolex camera. It was so well lit. You could see me when I was age five, 10, 12. They had moments for shots of me. Who were you helping? My dad was an amazing, it was amazing cameraman. It's crystal clear. People looked at it and said, they've seen each of Hollywood stories that didn't have such good footage of famous actors. My dad knew how to shoot, steady hand, great shots of me and my sister and brother when we were little.

28:11 Adam Wow, I always love that. Always makes me want to kill my parents though, when I see this stuff. I see like footage of guys from the 40s and 50s, and I think, Jesus Christ, I was a kid in the 70s. There's not a yard of film on me.

28:24 Caller I was born in 53 and people are amazed how clear the footage is. It was blown up to wide screen too.

28:29 Adam All right. Well, you don't have a copy of that with you, do you?

28:33 Caller The movie here? Yeah. No, we actually don't.

28:36 Adam All you got is your penis.

28:38 Caller That's all I'm good for.

28:40 Adam Another one? No, that's all I got for Ron.

28:43 Caller He's the one that's flesh and blood.

28:43 Adam I get no movies. I get no nothing. I get no minkah videos. I just get his penis.

28:48 Caller No, I got to bring you some stuff. We came right from the airport. We were doing press in San Francisco. I was in New York doing the Barbara Walters thing. And then we went. The View? I was on The View, yeah. That's crazy. Then I just came straight here, went to San Francisco from New York and just came off the plane about an hour ago. So I.

29:06 Drew How did Barbara sort of prepare for the interview?

29:08 Caller She said in the beginning of the show, and it was cute that she wasn't really too keen on having me there, but the four ladies outvoted her, although she's the owner of the show, and decided to have me on. And the star was cute, because the star says, you know, they all saw the documentary and they all liked it. And the star said, he seems like just a nice guy. We don't want to like him because we don't really like that business, but seems like a nice guy. He seems like a brother-in-law. So the first thing I said to her when I got on the panel was, I'd be your brother-in-law any day. I tried to get goofy with him and stuff. From what the people tell me is, I didn't win them over, but I eased them a little. I defuse them a little bit. They have these preconceived notions that what a person would be like from this industry. All the ladies in the panel, especially the Asian lady, I think, and Bihar, the ladies actually, I think they were a little bit easier. I think I smoothed them and smoothed them a little bit, let's say.

30:00 Adam Well, Ron's a very affable guy and he's the clown prince of pornography.

30:06 Caller You know, the replay of the footage was a very well-known morning DJ replayed the footage and the audio from that this morning and he actually said I should have shown them my you-know-what and bopped it on their heads. Howard said that, swear to God.

30:19 Adam Hit them with your scepter. Drew, you got a call worked out here?

30:23 Drew I can't read line one and four.

30:25 Adam All right, well, let's go pick another one then. You want to take one or four?

30:29 Drew No, no, it's fine.

30:30 Adam All right, John?

30:31 Ron Jeremy Hey.

30:32 Adam You're seventeen?

30:34 Ron Jeremy Yeah, it's a little weird. My brother earlier this year, not earlier this year, but since my little sisters were really little, he's been like, he was molesting him and stuff and doing sexual things with him, obviously.

30:50 Drew Wait, wait, how many siblings do you have?

30:52 Ron Jeremy What?

30:53 Drew How many siblings do you have?

30:54 Ron Jeremy I have two little sisters.

30:55 Drew And you have an older brother?

30:56 Ron Jeremy And I have three older brothers, but the one just above me. He's nineteen.

31:01 Drew And he's the one that's been doing this to the younger girls?

31:03 Ron Jeremy Yeah, since they've been really, really little.

31:06 Adam Both of them.

31:07 Caller Are you all from the same mom and dad?

31:09 Adam Yeah.

31:10 Drew Did you tell someone about this?

31:13 Ron Jeremy My little sisters came to me earlier this year, because he's been doing it for eight years.

31:19 Adam To both of them?

31:20 Ron Jeremy What?

31:22 Drew Wow.

31:22 What?

31:24 Adam To both of them?

31:26 Caller Yeah, to both of them.

31:28 Adam And how old are they now?

31:30 Ron Jeremy They're now, one of the older ones, she's 14 and the younger one is 9. She just turned 10 last month, so now she's 10.

31:38 Adam Okay. And they booted him out of the house?

31:42 Ron Jeremy Well, they came to me just earlier this year, about February, and they told me and I told my parents.

31:49 Adam Right.

31:50 Ron Jeremy And they went through LDS Family Services, which is a bunch of old crap, but, yeah. They didn't do much about it. They took him to count, like, he has to do mandatory counseling, and he had to do some community service, but now they're letting him move back in the house.

32:08 Drew Ooh, boy.

32:10 Caller That's a mistake.

32:11 Drew He's cured, huh?

32:12 Adam He's, yeah. Oh, yeah. You get that right out of your system after eight years. That's how it works. He's 19 years old.

32:20 Ron Jeremy Yeah, he's 19 years old.

32:21 Adam And does he have emotional problems? I mean, does he, should he be on medication?

32:27 Ron Jeremy He's like, emotional problems, like with girls, like he has, he's had really, really, really bad acne for a really long time. So he hasn't been a hit with the ladies.

32:38 Drew Why doesn't he get that treated?

32:40 Ron Jeremy I don't, I don't like he, I guess he has, but like he wants the medication to work like overnight or something and so he gets discouraged and he gives up.

32:46 Adam Okay. And this is, and what about your older brothers, the ones that are older than this guy, they still in the house?

32:53 Ron Jeremy One is living with us because he's married and he has a kid. And my mom's in a wheelchair. And so they help out with my mom and stuff.

33:02 Drew Why is she in a wheelchair?

33:03 Ron Jeremy She has multiple sclerosis.

33:05 Adam So, so, okay, hold on. Let's all just close our eyes for a second and be thankful we're not living in that house.

33:12 Drew Okay.

33:12 Adam Holy Christ. I would rather live in a Cuisinart with a Badger. Exactly. I really would. I'd be more comfortable. I could sleep better, I think. Jesus Christ, John. All right. Let me just say a couple of things.

33:24 Drew All right. Blocks on the girls' doors, number one. Right?

33:27 Ron Jeremy Well, they're going to put some kind of alarm system on.

33:30 Adam But like I, I was like, do you think you could kick this guy's ass if you needed to?

33:37 Ron Jeremy Probably not because I only weigh, I'm 5'10 and 140 pounds and he's like 6'2 and.

33:43 You pansy.

33:44 Adam Yeah. Well, what about your older brother?

33:46 Ron Jeremy He's actually his good, good friend.

33:49 Adam But he doesn't, he certainly doesn't condone this, does he?

33:53 Ron Jeremy No, but they like, well, they're really, really like, I'm the only one that's not like, they're really, really, really, I guess you could say hardcore Mormons. And so like they all forgive him.

34:04 Caller For real? They really are Mormons?

34:05 Ron Jeremy Yeah. They're my family's Mormon. Like I'm the only one that doesn't go to church.

34:09 Adam Jesus Christ.

34:12 Ron Jeremy One brother's on a mission in Mexico, so he doesn't even know about any of this.

34:16 Adam Yeah. I haven't read The Watchtower in a while, but what about banging your sisters? Is there some chapter in there on that?

34:24 Ron Jeremy What about what?

34:27 Adam This is real life taboo. Hey John?

34:30 Ron Jeremy Hey what?

34:31 Adam Here's the deal.

34:32 Ron Jeremy All right.

34:32 Adam You sound like the only sane one in that entire family. Oh, okay. All right. So let me explain your mission in life.

34:38 Ron Jeremy All right.

34:39 Adam Your mission is to not crank out any kids in the next 10 years and get yourself into this, you know, anchor down with this crappy lifestyle. Get your grades up in school and go far, far away to college, like somewhere in China or something.

34:58 Ron Jeremy I mean, I'm thinking about going to California.

35:00 Adam Just get the F out of there. I don't even know how you got, you know, I don't know how you were born to this circus family, but this is a disaster.

35:08 Caller What are the girls like and how are the girls taking all this?

35:10 Ron Jeremy They're kind of, I don't know, my parents have kind of brainwashed them with this whole religion thing, said, you know, he's repented and he's like, righteousness.

35:20 Caller What are their ages again?

35:21 Ron Jeremy 14 and nine or 10.

35:23 Drew Wow, that's just awful.

35:25 Adam And can't, this guy at 19, I mean, I moved out at 19, everyone moves out at 19.

35:31 Caller And you're a fine, upstanding member of society.

35:33 Adam Certainly as far as you know.

35:34 Drew I guess it's okay for them to forgive him.

35:36 Ron Jeremy May, and that's when I'm moving out with him.

35:38 Adam All right, just look, get out of there. And meanwhile, keep a watchful eye on those sisters. And oh my God.

35:44 Caller Is he still on?

35:45 Adam No.

35:46 Caller I wonder if he believes that the guy is fairly cured, because we don't really buy it.

35:49 Drew No, no, no, no, he doesn't.

35:50 Caller He doesn't buy it either.

35:52 Adam Well, yeah, but wait a minute. He says, he's now, it's got the... What? He's Mormon, so he's gotta be cured, right? All right.

36:04 Caller Is that how it works?

36:04 Adam No, no, that's a disaster. That's a horrible religion. That whole religion's a mess. You know, one of the problems with religion that I hate is, is when people are in bona fide wackos, instead of doing the real work, which is doing some therapy, really hunkering down and doing the tough work of therapy, they just slide into the religion a little deeper, and that's going to take care of everything.

36:31 Caller I think there's one thing worse than, of course, the Mormon, radical extremists to Islam.

36:37 Adam Yeah, I guess so.

36:38 Caller We're having a problem with that right now, aren't we?

36:40 Adam I guess at this point, yeah, that's a very good point. All right, let's say hi to-

36:45 Drew Is there a call on line one?

36:46 Adam No. Line one is gone. Let's talk to Jason, he's 17.

36:51 Caller Hello?

36:52 Adam Hey.

36:53 Caller Hey, how you doing? Good. All right, this is my problem. I fantasize about having sex with men, and I watch gay pornography, and I've had sex with another man before.

37:09 Caller How old are you?

37:10 Adam 17.

37:12 Caller Go ahead.

37:13 Adam Don't try not to talk to the callers around the confusions. Go ahead, Jason. Sorry about that big man.

37:19 Caller That's all right. I don't know, like I've now, you know, like when I had, when I had the sexual experience with another man, I was, it was a very young age, you know, like before 10 years old.

37:30 Drew Well, that was sexual abuse. That's not a sexual experience.

37:33 Caller No, because it wasn't with a, well, it wasn't with a man. It was with a, you know.

37:37 Adam Man child?

37:38 Caller Another kid, yeah.

37:40 Drew That's still, that's still likely to have been sexual abuse.

37:42 Adam Well, how old was the kid? Your age?

37:44 Caller Oh, yeah.

37:45 Adam All right. All right. So keep going.

37:47 Caller All right. And I, I, you know, wonder if I'm, you know, straight and, Well, here's the deal.

37:55 Adam To me, if you're watching gay porn, you're gay. Uh-oh.

37:59 Drew Uh-oh.

38:00 Adam Uh-oh, mama?

38:02 Caller Hello?

38:03 Adam Hello?

38:04 Drew You all right?

38:05 Caller Uh-oh.

38:07 Adam Uh-oh. This is one of the more uncomfortable parts of the job, it really is.

38:13 Drew There is the diagnosis, though, doesn't it, Adam?

38:15 Adam Yeah. Yeah.

38:16 Drew Yeah.

38:17 Adam Overbearing mom always turns a guy gay.

38:19 Caller Hello?

38:20 Adam Ball buster mom makes you gay as your mom.

38:22 Caller Who's that lady in the background? Is that your mom?

38:24 Caller Yeah.

38:24 Adam Yeah.

38:25 Caller I'm sorry about that.

38:26 Adam You tell that hag to get back on her broom.

38:28 Caller You ought to be ashamed of yourself.

38:30 Adam And fly to Salem.

38:31 Caller All right.

38:32 Adam All right. Look, if you're, if you, here's the deal. Why, you don't have to declare. You're 17. If you like guys at this point, you like guys. You don't have to give yourself a label.

38:43 Caller Well, see, the thing is that I really, you know, I really, I don't know, I can't see myself having, you know, sex with another man.

38:50 Drew But, but, Well, he's in that first experience.

38:53 Caller Yeah. But, I mean, I still, you know, fantasize and whatnot.

38:57 Adam Yeah. All right. Well, okay, so there's confusion.

38:59 Drew So it's like that first experience, yeah, that first, that early abuse sort of scrambled him and now he can't quite get the wiring right. He doesn't really feel that he's biologically gay. He had sort of some impulses maybe from that early arousal experience.

39:11 Adam But, okay. So what's the plan?

39:14 Drew I don't know what he can do to change this. He just sit and stand by. See how this goes as he matures.

39:20 Caller Does he also watch heterosexual porn to get excited?

39:24 Adam Let's ask him. Jason?

39:25 Caller Yeah.

39:26 Adam You watch any hetero porn?

39:28 Caller Yes, I do.

39:28 Caller Which excites you more?

39:31 Caller Both really is. I get the same excitement level.

39:34 Adam Well, there's a penis in both.

39:35 Caller When you're looking at two men, are you fantasized of being at either one direction as the giver or taker?

39:41 Caller The giver.

39:42 Caller You fantasize more being the giver?

39:44 Drew Why is that important, Ron?

39:45 Caller Well, it's interesting because I'm saying the degrees aren't there?

39:49 Adam I'm guessing. I'm with Ron, and I think what Ron's saying is, if you're the taker, you're gayer.

39:56 Caller Well, some people say that. Also, you take a bigger disease risk, I guess.

39:59 Adam But I mean, is a giver, well, who the hell?

40:03 Caller It's hard to say, I mean.

40:04 Drew It's called the receiver.

40:05 Adam The receiver.

40:06 Ron Jeremy Yeah.

40:07 Adam The banger and the bangee. Like here's the deal, you should be completely disgusted by gay pornography if you're straight. You really should.

40:18 Caller It should be disgusting. I never, I couldn't get a lift off for it, I wouldn't be able to, you know. See, I have the one advantage of, I got the ugliest behind in town, gay guys wouldn't want me. They'd look at me and say, just say no to crack.

40:31 Adam That is a great strategy.

40:33 Caller They'd rather inhale anthrax.

40:34 Adam They did some gay porn in the late 70s.

40:37 Caller No, but actually, it is an interesting viewpoint, because I wonder, I used to find out when a guy, Dr. Drew too, if a guy has a certain amazing fondness for doing a girl on the rear end and nowhere else.

40:48 Adam Yeah.

40:48 Caller Or guys who would say they like large sized things up theirs, I find that has a bit of a gay tendency, don't you?

40:55 Adam Yeah. Well, the guy doing the girl-

40:57 Caller Unless you're doing a prostate exam.

40:59 Adam I don't know. The point is, if you're watching gay porn, I'm labeling you gay because-

41:03 Caller Or bisexual.

41:05 Adam Or bi. When I watch gay porn, I shiver. Like I get that bluh-bluh. I really would.

41:13 Drew How many times a week are you watching?

41:15 Adam Three or four. I'd rather watch a polo match played with my dad's head as the ball. Oh, God.

41:26 Caller To quote Sam Kenison, I really would. To quote the late great comedian, Sam Kenison, if you're straight, you look at a man's hairy behind and you just want to give it a shave. You don't want to do anything to it. That's the difference. You fold to your knees and give thanks, not head, that kind of thing.

41:39 Adam Yeah. Well, anyway, look, Jason doesn't have to figure it out. That's what we're saying.

41:44 Caller Take the pressure off. My advice to him would be, Dr. Drew, is that look at what entertains you and enjoy whatever you're watching. If you, like you said, stand by and see which direction you want to go on you, I guess you get older.

41:54 Adam Right.

41:54 Caller But he shouldn't be made to feel guilty for either one, I assume.

41:57 Drew No, that's right.

41:57 Caller I don't think his mom will have a certain slant, but you know.

42:00 Adam No, he's fine.

42:00 Drew It's interesting how there's a sense though that it's really not him, that it's something that's sort of a part of him, but it really isn't incorporated in him wholly yet.

42:07 Caller But he shouldn't be afraid to enjoy either or.

42:10 Adam No. Listen, he'll be fine unless there's a God. We got to take ourselves a little bit of break. Ron Jeremy is our guest tonight, legendary adult film actor, done more than any of them, except for that God damn Tommy What's-His-Name, Byron, with the big calves.

42:25 Caller I think I've done more films than he's done.

42:27 Adam Yeah, I think you have too. All right. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody. Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew, our guest tonight. Legendary adult film actor, Ron Jeremy. Ron was just asking me off the air, Drew, if you got any tail on the side, like when we travel and hit the road and that kind of stuff.

43:16 Caller It's one thing you guys get. You do this for so many years. And girls find it a real turn on to be with a guy who's a doctor, and he's comforting, he knows his stuff, and there's a certain success type of thing. Both are very pleasant looking fellows. Oh, look at this. Look at this. That's something. I'm plugging in my movie. I got to be in it. So we're all going to make a film, Romeo and Julio, you know. So I was wondering if the girls actually, like if he goes for that kind of stuff, and if the celebrity hood gets to be fun after a while, I've seen you guys over the years.

43:43 Adam I'll tell you truthfully about Drew, and stop me if I'm lying here, Drew. He has never screwed around. He will not have sex with strange women on the road. He has no problem with getting a BJ.

43:54 Caller You are a happily married man, Dr. Drew, but now do you ever get tempted at all?

43:58 Adam No. He can't even admit that.

44:00 Drew No, I look, but I would never do that to my wife and kids. I just couldn't imagine doing that.

44:05 Caller Right. I have a very strange lifestyle, and again, you are just like my family, Dr. Drew, my brother, my family. There's no divorces in the whole family, and it's a very monogamous family. But I've often seen cases where you can be emotionally monogamous, and this is not your lifestyle. Maybe it's gonna be more mine, of course. Or you can be emotionally monogamous, not necessarily with the genitalia. I'd be more upset if a girlfriend would say to me that I'm taking a walk in the mountaintop with a guy, or we're going snorkeling together, bike riding, or having dinner together, or cuddling, rather than just simply having a quick little nookie, and it's goodbye, never see him again kind of thing.

44:37 Drew Yeah, and it must be, it really must look different from where you sit, you know what I mean? Having to experience what you experience.

44:44 Adam You're talking about hell?

44:46 Drew He's a different life, but I'll tell you what I know, is that if you really have an intimate relationship, doing, being with another person diminishes that intimacy. It just does.

44:58 Caller Yes, it can.

44:59 Adam But I'm with Ron in that having a little computer pal, phone sex, or cyber sex friend, it probably diminishes it more than a BJ in the back of a limo with some drunken Canadian prostitute when you're on the road.

45:12 Drew You keep trying to talk me into that one.

45:15 Caller How about if a guy is a husband on the road, let's say. Let's say they're apart for a month at a time and they both do something quick and fast and there's no emotion. It doesn't really threaten the relationship any, whereas if I see a guy say, oh, she's just dating this guy, he's a friend, then that could be worse.

45:29 Adam Yeah, I agree. Speaking of that, wait a minute. Daniel has a secret email question. Daniel?

45:39 Hello?

45:39 Adam Hey, you're 35.

45:40 Caller Yes.

45:41 Adam You read your girlfriend's email secretly, found out she's fantasizing about a guy.

45:46 Caller Yes. These actually go back earlier this year.

45:49 Adam Who is she corresponding with?

45:51 Caller A work colleague. They met at a work convention earlier this year.

45:56 Drew What do you mean it's a fantasy? She's actually having a relationship with him.

46:00 Caller No. They met at this convention and have just been corresponding by email since. They haven't seen each other since that.

46:08 Adam Are these things sexually graphic, or are they just chatter?

46:11 Caller A little bit more charged by her side than his. I read all the emails and he seems more reluctant than she does.

46:18 Adam Oh my God. Was your heart just pounding as you read those things?

46:22 Caller Yeah.

46:22 Adam Did you get a good vengeance whack off too? That'd be my angle. I'd be angry and I didn't get a little vengeance whack.

46:28 Caller No, actually I was planning to do that. It's tough to do that.

46:30 Adam Taking it out of my penis.

46:31 Caller I had a good one ready to go that night and I just lost it.

46:34 Adam Yeah. I'm sorry to hear that. Well, listen, now how long have you been with her?

46:39 Caller Three years.

46:39 Adam Three years. Were you planning on getting married?

46:42 Caller Yes.

46:43 Adam Okay, so.

46:44 Caller I think I still am.

46:45 Adam Okay. No, it can be done. It can be done. Well, hold on a second now. We gotta go to break.

46:50 Drew Maybe this is her, you know, a lot of women have these flings just before they get married. You know what I mean? They have to get something out of their system real quick before they get married.

46:56 Adam Yeah, and maybe this is that, but this is just what we were talking about and Ron was saying she'd rather this guy boffer once while she was at some convention in Orlando and come back free and clear or have a friend down the block who will go to the movies together.

47:11 Caller No, we don't have sex, we just go to movies, go bowling, we have dinners together. I think that's really worse in the long run than just making one little noise and never seeing them again. I think it's corny as it might sound.

47:22 Drew Ron, don't ever make that noise again on this show.

47:25 Caller I apologize, I get bleeped.

47:27 Adam All right, we'll take ourselves a little break. I'm going to see if I can get Ron to make that during the commercial break, make that noise. And we'll be right back and we'll finish up with Daniel after this.

47:38 Caller Here it is.

47:38 Adam Bottom line, it sucks being single today.

47:41 Caller Tons of lame people and no decent prospects.

47:43 Adam Call the Dateline.

47:44 Caller Call the Dateline. Call the Dateline.

47:46 Caller 1-877-889-DATE. Love line will be right back. So get your problems ready. Ready.

48:33 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Ron Jeremy is our guest tonight, legendary adult film actor, director. Does a fair amount of straight stuff these days as well. And he's here tonight plugging his documentary, which he's the star of now, Eden.

48:57 Caller Opens up in theaters tomorrow night at the New Art Theatre.

49:01 Adam Now, how big a hand did you have in making this?

49:05 Caller They followed me around for about two and a half years, and there was no pressure. It was a relaxed schedule. And he got to the whole family, and he got to my old school, Queens College. I mean, so, again, it's a pretty, you went into depth. They got from basically age five on, discussing what went on in my life and things that I did.

49:21 Adam And he approached you.

49:23 Caller They came to me and I originally said, no, I said, no way.

49:25 Adam Why?

49:26 Caller Because I know how we true Hollywood stories are, those things, you know. It never really helps a career, but then I realized that they always discover skeletons in the closet. Then I realized that I didn't have any. He said, I never had a drinking problem or alcohol or a drug problem, and I only have one little skeleton. 23 years of adult movies, you know, it's kind of a wooly mammoth skeleton, isn't it? So, yeah, but so I figured, and there wasn't much really, and I had a lot of fun things people have always found interesting, you know, the teacher, the family of veterans, I have war heroes in my family, especially now, what's going on today, I mean, I even carry this, I've been wearing that flag on my pinky ring for years, not just because it's in style now. You know, my mom was in the OSS, which became the CIA, yeah. She spoke fluent German and French when she was, you know, back in the 40s, and she was in the first graduating class of Queens College. So she worked for the, you know, during World War II, my mother flew all over the world as a decoder, as a cryptographer, you know, and they even gave her an honorary rank of lieutenant. In case she was ever caught or captured, she'd get respect. Then she came down with Parkinson's disease, that's in the documentary as well, which is now getting a lot of attention with Janet Reno and Michael J. Fox, and she was one of the very first guinea pigs to be experimented with with the cryogenic surgery. You know, where they're using cold probes and they don't do it anymore either, Dr. Drew.

50:41 I didn't.

50:42 Caller The first operation worked, the second one was bad, but she was always a very courageous woman, and she went through it, and then it eventually took away her life.

50:49 Adam When did she pass away?

50:51 Caller When I was, I think it was about the 20, I've been in the business for about a year, about 22 years ago.

50:56 Adam Now, you know, would she have objected to this more than you had?

51:00 Caller I asked my dad that, and I've always asked my dad that. He says, you know, she had great expressions, and again, a lot of this is in the documentary. She said that, you know, Ronnie dances to a different drummer. You know, because I have such a very professional family, you know, all monogamous, all doctors, you know, everyone's got a Ph.D. and master's degrees on my family. It's East Coast family. And she always said that Ronnie dances to a different drummer. She was always called into school because I was always trying to be the class clown. Teachers would say that, you know, Ronnie is a smart boy, but just make him shut up. You know, I was always a, you know, kind of what you're always saying to me too, Adam, you know.

51:29 Adam Yeah, except for the smart. I don't call you smart, I just say shut up.

51:32 Caller Just shut up. Tell this idiot to shut his face. You know, so, yeah, so all this stuff is in there in the documentary. People find it very interesting. I had a cousin who actually was a war hero. I mean, he died a hero and was given a Purple Heart and a Medal of Honor from FDR. So a lot of that stuff. World War II. Yeah.

51:47 Adam What, which campaign was he involved with?

51:49 Caller The German, Battle of the Bulge.

51:51 Drew FDR gave him the Medal of Honor, Adam, after the Desert Storm.

51:57 Adam Hey, Jackass, I want to know if he was in the Pacific fighting the Japs or in Europe against a crowd.

52:03 Caller Most of my family, my dad, my dad and most of my uncles were fighting in the Japanese front because most American men were doing that. But he, actually, a very interesting story, too, is that at that time Jews weren't getting a lot of officer training school. He was a sergeant, as was my dad, and he purposely wore a cross, and it worked. He got into the officer training school, became a lieutenant, and I think I was also going to be a captain. Then he was a pilot. He flew over the Battle of the Bulge, landed the plane to pick up some wounded Americans, was shot by a sniper, died, was buried under the cross in Belgium. Then my aunt brought him back to America and buried him under the star of David. So it's a fascinating story. So there's a lot of interesting things. That's in the DVD. Now a lot of it didn't get into the film version because it was a present. Well the director said there was too much in the periphery. He did shoot The Purple Heart and The Medal of Honor. He did shoot that, and it will be in the DVD, but that's not in the film. But my mom's stuff about her is in the film, about her experiences during the war. My whole family is all veterans, except me and my brother, because we were in the Vietnam era, and we didn't think it was a good war.

53:02 Adam How am I going to jack off to this, though? I mean, that's really what's going through my mind.

53:05 Caller Well, there's a lot of sexy girls to jack off to, trust me. There's a lot of adult stuff in there, too, of course.

53:11 Adam Now, what about some of the starlets that you worked with back when, 20 years ago? Did any of them get interviewed today?

53:19 Caller Yes, there are some girls from the old days that are in there, yes.

53:22 Drew What are they doing now?

53:24 Caller Well, not the ones we're necessarily in the documentary, but Vanessa Del Rio is now doing bodybuilding. Samantha Fox is a phys ed instructor in New York. Annette Haven, I believe, is going to a computer school and I think is happily married. Seiko lives in Chicago with a really great guy. She married this really good guy and she has her mail order. I mean, a lot of them are living very happy, healthy, doing fine. And the girls today who are on the contract are making so much money, as I mentioned earlier. They're with their websites. Like a lot of girls, like for example, Asia Quare, for example, they make so much money on their websites, she only has to do a couple of films a year. And other girls do these appearances on the road, like Jenna does, or the Blondage Girls, and they make a lot of money on the road, doing their feature dancing and appearances. It's a big business for a lot of these girls, I'm telling you.

54:09 Adam In a way...

54:10 Caller And there's no guys, no middlemen. It's just you and the consumer with a webmaster and that's it.

54:14 Adam Couldn't you... you could almost liken it to what a lot of the old athletes say, which is, they weren't making the big bucks, getting the big contracts back when. I mean...

54:25 Caller But now, yeah.

54:26 Adam But now, what these... I mean, I wonder if some of these women, and I know Seca's probably made enough...

54:31 Caller And I worked with a lot of women, like, at Metro, where I worked... the general manager was a woman, I was listening to her, she was booking me on shoots, I mean, Candida Royale runs her own company, I mean, when the feminists keep complaining, oh, this is a man's business, a lot of the bosses are the women nowadays.

54:44 Adam Yeah, and they get paid ten times as much. James, you have a question for Ron?

54:50 Yeah, I was just wondering if he ever worked with John Holmes and what it was like if he didn't.

54:56 Caller We were in a lot of the same movies together, we used to have jokes, he used to call me Little Penis, because he's 11 3 quarters and I'm 9 3 quarters, I used to say, John, I hit bottom, where are you going to go? With you it's not sex, it's a pap smear. But we did a bunch of films together, we did a lot of movies together, not even once in the same scene with a girl named Dreya, Bill Margo's ex-girlfriend, we actually did a scene, we did a threesome with a girl.

55:20 Adam What? He didn't seem like Mr. Personality, John Homes.

55:24 Caller No, he's the life. If you look at his documentary too, which I think E-channel did a thing, and a guy named Cass did a documentary with him for VCA, he lied a lot. He did some really horrible things, like they even say in the documentary that he was a rat, he was working with the police, no one knew he was busting shoots that he wasn't in. He would steal luggage at airports if he needed money, he would steal someone's luggage.

55:44 Adam He might go down to LAX and just steal luggage.

55:48 Caller He did that, he also got involved in some serious drugs.

55:52 Drew Again, it's all drug addict behavior.

55:54 Caller Yeah and again, Kandison Sam made this very funny joke about him, saying the man claims he had sex with 20,000 women, he switches to heroin and gay sex, it's what we call bad career management. He died the day before my birthday, which is interesting, actually the day of my birthday really.

56:09 Adam He died in prison, right?

56:11 Caller No, he came out and he died of intestinal cancer in a hospital. He died the night of March 11th and I was born on March 12th in the morning.

56:19 Adam He had AIDS though, didn't he?

56:20 Caller Yes, he died of intestinal cancer brought about by AIDS, yes.

56:24 Adam And this guy, remember that whole Laurel Canyon massacre that went on out there?

56:29 Caller Yeah, the Wonderland, he was involved in some serious murders with a bunch of people, either as an accessory, and there's been some talk according to some of the police, he may have actually himself been bludgeoning one of the people. So not a good guy.

56:41 Adam Yeah, the whole story with that, or at least the way everyone thought it went down, is he knew something and he didn't want to say anything because the guys who did this would do this to him, and just a crazy...

56:54 Caller He got involved in bad drug deals, I mean, he'd put groups against each other and be stuck in the middle, and then when a group wants to retaliate, go, now you bring us to them so we can retaliate, and he was caught in the middle and was... He just made a lot of dumb, dumb, dumb moves.

57:07 Adam Yeah, I don't think he was a real genius, but how...

57:09 Caller He was a nice guy on sets, we got along, he was nice to me, we used to make jokes about it, I mean, but, you know, he just had these severe problems.

57:17 Adam Alright, so James? Yeah. Never... One scene with him, actually. Yeah. What was the name of that movie? What was the name of that movie, do you remember?

57:28 Caller Well, the one I know we did together was called W Pink TV. It was me, John Holmes and Harry Reams, and it was a funny, funny skits. In fact, the guy who directed that film directed a very big TV series called Night at the Improvs, so it was actually mainstream directors.

57:40 Adam Wait, it was Christie Canyon in that movie? I got that movie.

57:43 Caller And Ali Moore.

57:44 Adam Sure.

57:45 Caller John Holmes, it's John Holmes, Harry Reams and myself were in it. It was a great little movie. And then me and John, we did another film for...

57:51 Adam So you play newscaster?

57:52 Caller Yes.

57:52 Adam Yeah, except for, there's this one great scene where he's wearing a sport jacket, a tie and a collar, and then they pan down and he's swinging his penis around like a jump rope.

58:02 Caller We also did a film for Hollywood Video for Hal Freeman called The Valley Girls and Taking It to the Max. Me and John Holmes were in that one together. Another one was a Carlos Tublina film, I forgot the name of it, where it was me, him and Dre.

58:14 Adam Well, wait a minute, I don't remember John Holmes from the WPink TV.

58:20 Caller He was in it. He was on the box cover also.

58:24 Adam Yeah, I'm sorry, just waxing poetic, taking a walk down memory lane with Ron Jeremy. WPink TV, yeah. Funny film. Oh, okay. A puckish satire, Drew. Stephanie, you're 22, what's up?

58:46 Caller I am an addict. I've been an opiate addict for four years. In the past six months, I've gotten into heroin. Before that, it was Oxycontin and Pest-Bet. Right. I very much am ready to stop. I want to get into a program, thinking like a 30-day program. I used to see a psychiatrist that my mom still sees.

59:17 Drew Did that psychiatrist know you were using? No. Well, you got to go.

59:22 Caller He knew I was a marijuana user when I was 13. Nothing big. No.

59:27 Adam So you got to get in a program, right?

59:29 Drew You got to go and be prepared to go to Sober Living to follow that. You got to go. It's going to take some time. It's going to be hard work and you're going to do it.

59:35 Caller How is your health besides that?

59:37 Caller I'm healthy besides that. How long do you think it will be until I can get into a program? How quickly do they get you into the program?

59:45 Drew Well, do you have insurance? In fact, I would urge you to go tonight. If there's a psychiatric hospital or a psychiatric unit nearby that has a chemical dependency program, go now because you'll convince you'll find a reason not to go tomorrow and not the next day. When you're ready to go, just go down there and check yourself in immediately.

1:00:02 Adam Just go. It's 2.15 in the morning where she's going.

1:00:05 Drew Just go. Listen, I admit people are 2.15 in the morning all the time.

1:00:07 Caller Dr. Drew, do they usually advise women or guys with that history to go for HIV or hepatitis C tests?

1:00:15 Drew We do. Mandatorily. You can't force someone to get an HIV. You can't force anyone to do anything in terms of their medical condition.

1:00:21 Caller Have you taken those tests?

1:00:23 Caller I've taken them in the past. Since I've used needles, I've never shared needles. I've never shared this with anybody. This is kind of like my own thing.

1:00:31 Ron Jeremy I don't eat with other people.

1:00:33 Drew But you may have been around drug addicts. Do you have sex with them?

1:00:35 Caller No. I mean, I've had problems in the past, but I've gotten all my tests since then. I'm a pretty monogamous person.

1:00:45 Adam I think I know where Ron's going with this. Would you like to do some porn before you go?

1:00:50 Caller You are disgusting, Adam.

1:00:52 Adam You're going to need to put a little money away before you go into rehab.

1:00:56 Caller Dr. Drew, would you backhand him if you were here?

1:00:59 Caller No. Hey, Ron, I heard you on Opie and Anthony yesterday.

1:01:02 Caller How was it?

1:01:03 Caller Yeah, it was good. I never really heard about you before, but I had a good idea.

1:01:07 Caller Yeah, you're in a fun show.

1:01:08 Adam You got to turn the sound up once in a while. Hey, Stephanie, go do this, because you're 22, but you sound like you're 45.

1:01:17 Caller Yeah.

1:01:18 Adam It seems like you've had a tough life.

1:01:19 Caller I've had my fair share of stuff.

1:01:22 Drew The statistics on this are, Stephanie, that if you don't get into recovery by the time you're in your 30s, you're not going to live to see your 40s.

1:01:29 Adam All right.

1:01:29 Caller Now, speaking of which, real quick, isn't heroin one of the cheap exports of Afghanistan? Wasn't that Osama's big thing?

1:01:36 Adam Yeah, sure.

1:01:36 Caller He's really a bad guy.

1:01:38 Adam Well, there's nothing in the Quran that says you can't export heroin.

1:01:43 Caller Harala did this whole big exposition on that being a very big export to that and opium from that area.

1:01:47 Adam Yeah. Oh, yeah.

1:01:48 Caller Bad people.

1:01:49 Adam Yeah. I think Beanie Babies is one of the other big exports there from that mistake. We forgot to get back to Daniel.

1:01:56 Drew Okay.

1:01:56 Adam Poor son of a bitch. He's been on hold for 20 minutes. Now, Daniel called in, I think it was the last night, actually. No, it was before we went to break. He's 35. He has been with a woman for three years, I believe. He plans on getting married to her. He's very much in love, but he read her e-mail.

1:02:15 Drew And she's carrying on with some guy she met at a symposium or something.

1:02:19 Adam That's right. Through work. And did you confront her on this, Daniel?

1:02:22 Caller That's the thing. She's on a working vacation right now.

1:02:26 Drew With him?

1:02:27 Caller What's that?

1:02:28 Drew With him?

1:02:29 Caller No, no, not with him. All right. The tone of the e-mails, first of all, when it happened, I don't think anything sexual happened. I think it was just an intellectual connection.

1:02:38 Adam Okay. Well.

1:02:40 Caller And then the tone of the e-mails really has cooled off and the e-mail, like during the summer, she was talking to him as a friend and talking positively about me. So I know where her heart is. My question mainly is, when she comes back from her vacation in two weeks, should I confront her on this or am I just, would I be rubbing her nose in it?

1:02:57 Adam Well, let me ask a few questions.

1:02:59 Caller Okay.

1:03:00 Adam How long has she, have you been intercepting these correspondents?

1:03:06 Caller This, well, she just left for vacation a week ago and I've been house-sitting. She had, these e-mails were taken off her hard drive and they were on a disk.

1:03:15 Drew How'd you happen to find them?

1:03:17 Caller Well, I was looking for another disk and found these. I mean, it seems odd that there were e-mails taken off the hard drive, so I checked it out.

1:03:24 Adam Of course. Now, but what I mean is, how long have you been, how far back does this go?

1:03:29 Caller Okay, I think March of this year.

1:03:32 Adam March. And as far as, what direction have they been going in? Were they steamier in April than they were in August?

1:03:41 Caller That's a good question.

1:03:43 Caller Yes.

1:03:43 Adam They were.

1:03:44 Drew She's gearing up for a final fling. She really is.

1:03:49 Adam Hold on here, Drew. Now, wait a minute. So, they were more intimate back when and they've been cooling off?

1:03:57 Caller They cooled off, you know, really quickly.

1:03:58 Adam Well, where did they go? From what to what? Like, what, the steamiest stuff was what?

1:04:03 Caller You know, just mainly her talking about wanting to get together with him at, you know, some later date and...

1:04:11 Drew But not describing what she wants to do with him?

1:04:13 Caller Well, not real descriptive, no, but just getting together, you know, for, you know, a romantic time.

1:04:19 Adam Well, how do you, wait, did she say a romantic time?

1:04:22 Caller No, but just being naked with him.

1:04:24 Caller But they have gotten together already.

1:04:26 Adam Hold on, being naked?

1:04:27 Caller Yeah, she wanted to be naked with him.

1:04:29 Adam Okay, hold on a second. Drew, get the butterfly net.

1:04:35 Drew Yeah, I'm going.

1:04:36 Adam She said if a gal is telling a guy she wants to get together with him and be naked, she's saying, I want to have sex.

1:04:43 Caller Maybe they already did, you think they might have gotten together already? I'm a big fan, Dr. Joe, I feel 90% of the time I like communication. Yeah. And I'd be a fan of it in this case too, that I think he has to confront her.

1:04:57 Drew Well, if he's going to marry her, he's going to carry around this resentment forever and doubts about the right thing.

1:05:00 Caller You get less ulcers, you just have to confront her.

1:05:02 Adam I'm worried a little about Daniel's denial level.

1:05:04 Caller When in doubt, communicate.

1:05:06 Adam Now, these were earlier things, and then later on the conversation, the tone changed?

1:05:12 Caller Well, I mean, the tone did change. I think the guy was reluctant. I don't think anything did happen.

1:05:18 Adam Why don't you? Had they gotten together since the proclamation of getting nude together?

1:05:24 Caller No.

1:05:25 Adam They had not?

1:05:25 Caller They have not.

1:05:26 Caller Are you sure?

1:05:28 Caller Well, the other guy is 3,000 miles away. I know for sure it didn't happen.

1:05:32 Adam I see. I see. OK.

1:05:34 Caller And I was this morning. I'm here now.

1:05:37 Adam Yeah. I could blow Ron tonight. He'd have a good alibi.

1:05:40 Caller Well, what's her first name? No.

1:05:43 Adam So.

1:05:46 Caller That wasn't me.

1:05:46 Adam Yeah, it was.

1:05:47 Caller That was not me. That was it.

1:05:49 Adam Yeah, it was it.

1:05:49 Caller Yeah, it was not me. It was this girl's initials. I might know her. OK.

1:05:54 Adam Daniel, I think you need to discuss this.

1:05:59 Caller OK.

1:06:00 Adam And I do. OK. Now, what's the last, what d the last correspondents say?

1:06:07 Caller You were great.

1:06:10 Caller I don't quite remember. I mean, it was just, it had really cooled off. They were corresponding more as professionals.

1:06:15 Adam OK. And Daniel, why aren't you more upset by this?

1:06:19 Caller I was two nights ago. I tried calling a couple nights ago. I've been calling every night since and I've kind of mellowed out a little bit.

1:06:27 Adam OK. But it seems like there's a fair amount of denial in your voice.

1:06:33 Caller Are you a monogamist? Have you done anything other than her?

1:06:37 Caller No, for three years, no. We've been monogamists. I know where her heart is. I think her mind wandered.

1:06:44 Adam You've got to find out where her vagina is. Forget about the heart. OK.

1:06:50 Drew All of them are very uncomfortable. There's an uncomfortable situation.

1:06:55 Adam Yeah, because, you see, when we were asking him about, you know, how intimate were these correspondents, it's like, oh, no, no, nothing bad. I mean, they've, well, I mean, they've just talked about getting naked together.

1:07:05 Caller Yeah. She comes home some day and goes, hi, Daniel, hi, how's everything? You know, you're in trouble. How are you? Oh, Jesus Christ. You know, you're in trouble.

1:07:17 Adam The vomit's going to come out of my penis when I jack off tonight.

1:07:21 Caller I'm sorry I couldn't help it.

1:07:22 Adam You understand how that works?

1:07:24 Drew Those great sounds he makes.

1:07:25 Adam Yeah. Right at the moment, actually, it's going to be like just bits of corn and carrots coming out of there. All right. Drew, has vomit ever come out of the penis?

1:07:37 Caller No.

1:07:37 Adam I'm going to try tonight.

1:07:38 Drew Maybe like a fruit in the middle kind of.

1:07:40 Adam Okay.

1:07:42 Caller You could pass a stone out of there. But I don't know.

1:07:45 Drew Yeah.

1:07:45 Adam All right. Daniel needs to talk to her and he needs to keep his ears open when he discusses this with her.

1:07:54 Drew Right. He needs to be non-confrontative. He needs to have a dialogue with her about what is the reality, be open to hearing it, and then re-establishing the relationship based on what reality is.

1:08:04 Adam Let's talk to Isaac. Isaac?

1:08:07 Caller Hey, what's going on? What's going on, fellas?

1:08:08 Adam 24.

1:08:09 Caller What's up? Pretty good, man. First of all, I want to say Adam Corolla, your logic's flawless. Whatever.

1:08:16 Adam Thank you, Isaac from Napa.

1:08:18 Caller I mean, I get, I have, you're as if you're channeling the gods themselves. I mean, it's amazing.

1:08:22 Adam Thank you, thank you.

1:08:23 Caller Then when Dr. Drew, you're coming along, I appreciate you.

1:08:26 Caller Whatever.

1:08:27 Adam He's making strides. He's making strides.

1:08:28 Caller Hey, hey, and then, well, regardless, and then Ron Jeremy, your education, education is evident and that's wonderful, anyways.

1:08:36 Caller Thank you. Whatever.

1:08:37 Caller Speaking of, well, speaking of Ron Jeremy, though. Speaking of Ron Jeremy, I got a question, Ron.

1:08:42 Caller Shoot.

1:08:43 Caller Yeah, you, you, you're at, you're at 0.5% of the population that got, you got a big, you got a big junk, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. You can go all day, you can go all night, man. You're, you're amazing.

1:08:53 Caller Well, thank you for that and I don't know if that's true, but it sounds great. Good.

1:08:57 Caller Hey, well, within film magic, if film magic is a-

1:08:59 Caller Yes, it helps to, of course.

1:09:00 Caller Well, whatever, but my point is, look, I, I'm gonna ask girlfriend now, but it's been a while since I had a little sex, but this is my question. I, everything's good. I got a decent size, you know, dung and the only thing that sucks is, it's premature ejaculation.

1:09:19 Drew How premature?

1:09:21 Caller I mean, it's not, come on man, a couple of minutes. All right. But I mean, look, I just, you know, I want to see, I want to see my lady be satisfied.

1:09:30 Caller Did you ever try just stopping? You take a stroke or two and just stop and use maybe face, hands, I mean, you would just stop?

1:09:38 Caller Oh yeah, yeah, definitely, you know, but it's like, it's like, you know, you get to that point and as soon as you hit that little section...

1:09:44 Caller Well, how about if you do let go and then you go the second time, you'll last longer?

1:09:49 Caller Is that how it is or what?

1:09:50 Caller That'll sometimes work. If you let go with one technique, let's say oral, then you watch TV, have a little slight meal, then go on to the second where you last longer.

1:10:00 Adam A slight meal, a six foot sub and a pony cake.

1:10:03 Caller No, because it's true. When guys eat a big meal, they want to burp, let gas and sleep till Christmas. No, but you know what I'm saying? I've seen that work.

1:10:10 Caller Hey, introduce me to the girl that wants to eat in between and I'm freaking out. I'm there, you know?

1:10:15 Caller No, it's true. In our business, we do jokes about that. Like you think of something really grotesque in your mind so you can last longer. Or I'll look at the cameraman's foot. I've done that. I'll look at a light switch or take my mind off of it so I can keep on stroking. Or you think of something really gross in your mind. One guy was funny. He'd think about men. That's dangerous because if you let go anyway, it could change your whole way of life like Pavlov dogs, the Skinner Bucks. But the thing is, in real life, you don't have to do that. You can actually just stop, use another part of your body to get the girl going. A lot of girls will get off with a good tongue just as much as anything else.

1:10:51 Adam No, more.

1:10:52 Caller You know what I'm saying there, fella?

1:10:53 Adam Yeah, he does.

1:10:54 Caller I put him on a whole video. Again, to quote my little buddy Sam before he passed away, he said if he could give really good head, he would have to give away everything he owns every five years.

1:11:03 Adam Yeah. Well, we say it all the time, women, and I know you're jaded because in your business, the women are screwy and they're trained to fake it. But in real life, women like oral sex better.

1:11:15 Caller They do in our business too, a lot of them.

1:11:17 Adam Yeah.

1:11:17 Caller Well, that's the documentary, a lot of that. That's one of my favorite things to do, myself.

1:11:22 Adam You will do some more directing, I'm guessing, and let me tell you something, cut that scene short. Would you, with the guys going down, I don't mind a little bit, let's not overdo it. That's not why I bought the film. You know what I'm saying?

1:11:36 Caller Yeah.

1:11:36 Adam What kind of guy watches that?

1:11:38 Caller I don't know. Dr. Drew, I think he's clearing his throat now.

1:11:41 Adam Well, listen, Drew, did you hack something up that tasted like a woman? Here's what I'm saying. A little of that is fine, but there's more, there's better stuff. Let's get to it. That's what I'm saying. I am disgusted by directors who show the guy doing it on the girl and then not the girl doing it on the guy.

1:12:02 Caller That doesn't happen in the movie.

1:12:03 Adam That's not right.

1:12:03 Caller That never happens in a film. I've never seen that.

1:12:05 Adam Sometimes.

1:12:06 Caller That's bizarre. You have to show both.

1:12:07 Adam Sometimes there's a very extended dance version on her and then just a quick little ditty on him and then they're into the sex. I don't like that.

1:12:15 Caller Not good. Most adult films show a lot more of the girl giving it to the guy, I think.

1:12:19 Adam Let me give you, and rightfully so, and let me give you another directing tip here. Here's something I notice a lot in the adult film industry and it disgusts me.

1:12:28 Caller I'm taking notes. No saliva into the gate. No dribbling. I got the Adam Corolla list of things to change.

1:12:34 Adam Go ahead.

1:12:35 Caller I'm enjoying this. This is good.

1:12:36 Adam Here's what drives me nuts. I like the big jugs. I enjoy the big jug.

1:12:41 Caller You like natural more.

1:12:42 Adam I like natural more.

1:12:43 Caller You like Christie Canyon. I agree with you.

1:12:44 Adam But I'll take what I can get. And sometimes, so I get these movies, these big jugs 18 and stuff like that. I got all these crazy big jugs.

1:12:53 Caller More than a handful. Look at this number one.

1:12:55 Adam Oh, this Minka, yes. I get these big jug videos, right? Now I'm watching the movie and they don't exploit the jugs at all.

1:13:02 Caller Bad mistake.

1:13:03 Adam The girl gets on top. I'm looking at her back the whole time.

1:13:06 Caller That is ridiculous.

1:13:06 Adam What the hell kind of thinking is this?

1:13:08 Caller An idiot director. That's bad. That's very bad.

1:13:10 Adam I see it all the time. It's like, I got the big jug video with the gay director.

1:13:15 Caller That doesn't make any sense. That's foolish.

1:13:17 Adam You get the big jugs, get the chick on top, have her face the camera, you're retards.

1:13:21 Caller That's like when they think all the girls totally shaved and they're doing a little doggy style so they can't even see it.

1:13:25 Adam Right.

1:13:26 Caller No, it's a big, big, big mistake.

1:13:27 Adam All right, Ron, you would never do that to me?

1:13:29 Caller Not in a million years, Adam.

1:13:30 Adam All right, thanks, brother. All right, we're going to hug, all right?

1:13:34 Caller We're manly men.

1:13:34 Adam I have some vomit come out of my urethra. Ron's going to make that noise and we'll be around.

1:13:39 Caller Thanks, Adam.

1:13:40 Caller Thank you.

1:13:43 Adam Right after this.

1:14:12 Caller Hey, this is Tyra Banks, and you're listening to Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:14:17 Caller Yes, it's Drew.

1:14:20 Adam It's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Drew in Minneapolis tonight, although we hardly miss him. Ron Jeremy in studio, of course, legendary adult film star, Ron Jeremy. Something I thought about when I was urinating.

1:14:34 Caller I had a great time.

1:14:34 Adam I forgot to-

1:14:35 Caller Were you holding it, or can you do it without touching it? You have to wash your hands afterwards if you don't actually make contact with it.

1:14:41 Adam Yeah, I never-

1:14:42 Caller Am I right, Dr. Drew? You're being hygienic if you don't touch it.

1:14:45 Drew Yeah, well, we've had this discussion.

1:14:47 Adam Yeah, Ron doesn't touch it. You're kidding me.

1:14:49 Caller I didn't think this up? Oh, good Lord.

1:14:51 Adam Hey, we're talking about Geraldo, I think earlier tonight, or his name-

1:14:55 Caller I said that he actually was in Afghanistan and noticed how they had the poppy seed plants and the heroin. He made that discovery many years ago.

1:15:01 Adam I'll tell you the discovery I made many years ago. Harry Reims looks like Geraldo.

1:15:06 Caller They do. Yes, they do.

1:15:07 Adam My God, they do.

1:15:08 Caller Yes, they do. People noticed that. And there's a guy-

1:15:11 Adam Did people bring that up?

1:15:12 Caller Yes, they had brought that up. And John Holmes looked like Eddie Haskell. And that guy, Dave Morris, who was a porn actor, looked like that actor from Taxi. I forgot his name.

1:15:23 Adam Jeff Conway?

1:15:24 Caller No, no. Latke? Looks like Dandy, the comic book character from years ago. Wait. I forgot that name. I forgot the actor's name.

1:15:32 Adam Andy? Andy Kaufman? No, no, no. Oh, Judd Hirsch?

1:15:36 Caller No.

1:15:37 Adam Oh, Judd Nell. No, Judd-

1:15:39 Caller The young good-looking actor.

1:15:40 Drew Judd Hirsch. The one that disappeared after. The one with the five that disappeared.

1:15:43 Adam I said Jeff Conley.

1:15:45 Caller No, no.

1:15:46 Adam Oh, you mean Tony Danza?

1:15:47 Drew Thank you. Tony Danza.

1:15:49 Caller Tony Danza. People thought that Tony Danza was in a pool room scene with Marilyn Chambers. They know the guy's name is Dave Morris. It looks like Tony Danza.

1:15:55 Adam Yeah.

1:15:55 Caller A lot of people thought that it was him, a lot of people.

1:15:57 Adam Yeah. There's a porn actor, an older one that looks like Judd Hirsch, too.

1:16:02 Caller Jamie Gillis.

1:16:03 Adam Yes, Jamie Gillis.

1:16:04 Caller They do look a lot. Yes, they do look alike.

1:16:06 Adam Yeah.

1:16:06 Caller And Hirsch the Savage looks a little like Saddam Hussein. No, I'm kidding.

1:16:09 Adam Jamie Gillis. What a class act.

1:16:11 Caller But no one looks like me. Is that a good thing?

1:16:13 Adam Let me tell you one more porn star look alike. John Leslie.

1:16:18 Caller John Travolta.

1:16:19 Adam No.

1:16:20 Caller When he was young, he was a resemblance.

1:16:22 Adam Good looking guy, but hold on. John Leslie and the rich bachelor from The Flying Nun, Carlos or whatever the guy. She was always trying to fly over to his place. Never saw The Flying Nun.

1:16:35 Caller No, actually.

1:16:36 Adam You know how I hold those two together.

1:16:38 Caller I did see, but I don't remember the character.

1:16:40 Adam All right.

1:16:40 Drew Fernando Ray. What was his name?

1:16:45 Adam I'm telling you, if someone could get on the computer and find that guy and find John Leslie, you would see the same guy. All right. Where were we here, Drew?

1:16:53 Drew Line 4.

1:16:54 Adam Line 4.

1:16:55 Drew One on the web.

1:16:56 Adam Richard?

1:16:56 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:16:57 Adam What's up?

1:16:59 Well, dude, for anybody that knows anything about pumps, I got this pump a couple months ago. I've never even known about them. And, you know, I started off being 6 inches and been married for 10 years. And I just want to improve my wife and I relationship.

1:17:24 Yeah. It doesn't come with an instruction manual.

1:17:30 Adam It doesn't?

1:17:31 No.

1:17:32 Caller You see this giant tube? You put something in there, you know.

1:17:34 Yeah.

1:17:35 Adam What do you think? You put that up your ass?

1:17:37 No.

1:17:37 I'll tell you what, man, the guy...

1:17:39 Adam She sucked out my lower intestine. He's horrible.

1:17:41 He's pretty damn close.

1:17:43 Caller I think they're not good for you. And I actually feel guilty because I actually endorsed one many years ago. I think Dr. Drew will bear me out on this. I don't think they're that good for you. What it does is it makes you larger in the soft stage for a little bit of time. I think it cauterizes or just blows up the skin. Like if you suck on your arm right here long enough, the skin is going to stick out a little bit. Right.

1:18:00 Drew That's what I'm saying. It's like having an elephant's trunk hanging at the end of it.

1:18:03 Caller It'll make you look larger in the soft stage for a little while longer. But when you get the erection, it's going to be the same thing anyway. It'll puff up your skin and it'll go away in a matter of minutes. I don't think it really does anything.

1:18:13 Adam Well, look, if it did, everyone would have one.

1:18:16 Drew Alejandro Rey plays Carlos Ramirez.

1:18:18 Adam Carlos, that's what I said.

1:18:21 Thank you.

1:18:21 Adam Do you have a picture of the guy?

1:18:23 Drew Whatever. No.

1:18:24 All right.

1:18:24 Adam I'm telling me if someone find me a picture.

1:18:26 Caller I think it's really unhealthy. Would you agree with that? Not this character.

1:18:30 Drew I can't imagine it's good for you. No, I don't see where it would be.

1:18:32 Caller I can't see it being that good for you. No. I hate to do that to the companies that make those, but I don't think it's that good for you.

1:18:37 Adam Well, look, I think most guys do it.

1:18:39 Caller You're breaking capillaries, correct?

1:18:41 Drew You could.

1:18:42 Caller By sucking the skin. You could, sure.

1:18:44 Adam I mean, look, for three quarters of, there's a few things. First off, it's like a jack-off device, I think, for a lot of guys.

1:18:51 Caller It could be.

1:18:51 Adam I think they just like the feeling, the sensation of it. And the next thing is, it's just more time with them and their dork.

1:18:57 Caller If you want to make the girl feel better, try something different. Just try costumes, using your face, using other parts, you know, get little beads, dildos, vibrators, other things you could do, which you don't have to blow up your slant.

1:19:09 Adam I've said this many times, you want to get some good size out of that thing, just leave it on. Just do her with it on.

1:19:17 Caller Sure.

1:19:17 Adam There's no problem. There's some extra width and length, right?

1:19:21 Caller Sure.

1:19:21 Adam And it's graduated, so you know where you are.

1:19:23 Caller Or last longer. If you want to give your girl a really good time, just last longer, do it for a while, stop, do something else, go back to it again. There are other things you could do, rather than just try to blow up your penis.

1:19:33 Adam Maria?

1:19:35 Caller Hello?

1:19:35 Adam Hello?

1:19:36 Caller Hi. Hi. I don't believe I'm actually talking to you guys.

1:19:39 Adam Well, we're excited about talking to you, too.

1:19:42 Caller Okay, here's my problem. I've been dating this guy for about ten months now. And really early in the relationship, he brought up getting married. And I told him that I wasn't going to be ready for a couple of years. And I thought we had resolved the issue. And he brought up now moving in together. And I told him no again. And I'm just wondering, because I've been honest with him, and I've told him how I feel. But my friends are telling me to break up with him because I don't have that ultimate goal. And I eventually, within the next year, want to move away from here. So I'm just wondering, like, is it wrong for me to keep dating him?

1:20:21 Drew Are you honest with him about your feelings?

1:20:23 Caller I've been honest, but I kind of feel like...

1:20:24 Drew Then it's up to him.

1:20:27 Caller He's weird.

1:20:28 Drew Guys do this all the time with women, right? This is a guy's thing.

1:20:32 Caller Big, big mistake.

1:20:33 Adam Wait a second. Where do you want to move to?

1:20:38 Caller San Diego.

1:20:39 Adam Oh, well, big deal. You live in Anaheim now. I thought you were talking about Bolivia or something. Would you want him to move with you if things were going good a year from now?

1:20:49 Caller That wouldn't happen.

1:20:50 Adam Why not?

1:20:51 Drew What's the matter with him?

1:20:52 Adam Why are you so opposed to it? You start off by saying you've been with a guy for ten months and you're very much in love and now it's like hey this guy's baggage.

1:21:00 Caller No. No. I mean.

1:21:03 Caller Moving in could ruin relationships sometimes. It's not ready.

1:21:05 Caller No. I'm not trying to sabotage it. I'm just trying to ask if I'm being fair.

1:21:12 Adam Well, you know it's funny. We didn't say sabotage.

1:21:15 Caller Well, I know that's probably the next comment coming.

1:21:17 Adam No. This doesn't feel like sabotage per se. I mean, not in our traditional sense, but I'm just wondering that...

1:21:25 Drew You're just not into him.

1:21:27 Adam I'm wondering why you started off by saying what a great guy was and how you're very much into him. And now it just sounds like a total dead end situation here. I mean, why are you with him, really?

1:21:41 Caller He's a really nice guy.

1:21:42 Adam And you don't want to break his heart?

1:21:44 Caller Yeah.

1:21:45 Adam And here's a question, I guess. At this point in your life, at 22 years of age, could you be with anybody? Is it just this guy or are you just not really ready for anybody right now?

1:21:58 Caller I'm questioning that.

1:21:59 Drew And you told him that? You told him that? You told him that?

1:22:03 Caller I've been honest with him. And I think sometimes he chooses to tune me out.

1:22:08 Adam When did your parents break up?

1:22:10 Caller No, my parents have been married for 30 some years. Still together?

1:22:14 Adam Really? And everything's good there with you and stuff?

1:22:17 Caller Yeah.

1:22:17 Adam So you don't have any big problems? No one molested you or beat on you or anything?

1:22:21 Caller No.

1:22:22 Adam No alcoholism or weird daddy stuff?

1:22:24 Caller No.

1:22:25 Adam Okay. Well, look, if that's true, then you're just not into this guy.

1:22:30 Drew Well, you're just not into a relationship now either.

1:22:33 Adam I know. But, Drew, if she was saying...

1:22:36 Caller They could date?

1:22:37 Caller But here's my thing. Is it wrong to keep dating him?

1:22:40 Caller I don't think so.

1:22:40 Drew It's probably more wrong for you than it is for him.

1:22:42 Adam Right. It's wasting more of your time. At least he's getting blown once in a while.

1:22:49 Caller Good assumption. I think nothing ruins a relationship more than when you move in before you're ready to move in. I think those are all couples, I think.

1:23:00 Adam Well, look, here's the situation. And, Drew, you know that if she was calling and saying that her dad abandoned the family and she had an abusive stepdad and so on and so forth, we'd be encouraging her, look, stay with this, stay with the therapy and work on it. But she's saying, my parents are still together, 35 years have been married, everything's great, I got no real problems. I just want to get away from this guy in a couple of months. And she's not screwed up, she just ain't into the guy.

1:23:28 Caller She's either dating him, but not being that much together with him.

1:23:31 Adam And when you are a 22-year-old attractive woman, you're queen of the world. And when there's a young guy who's into you and a little bit needy, you got all the chips on your side of the table.

1:23:44 Caller Would he be willing to put up with your dating other guys too, or he wouldn't put up with that?

1:23:48 Adam No, he'd go nuts. He's into her.

1:23:51 Caller I don't feel comfortable doing that.

1:23:52 Adam He's your age?

1:23:54 Caller No, he's older.

1:23:55 Adam How old is he?

1:23:56 Caller He's 29.

1:23:58 Adam And the fact is, now what do you think, what if this guy, this guy's a little bit of a puss, right?

1:24:04 Caller No.

1:24:05 Adam No?

1:24:06 Caller No, not really.

1:24:07 Adam You mean it's not, if he was a little tougher with you, he wouldn't turn you on?

1:24:13 Caller No.

1:24:15 Adam He's a strong-willed guy?

1:24:17 Caller Yeah.

1:24:18 Adam He just wants to get married in his old fashion that way?

1:24:22 Caller Well, I think he's at that point and I'm not there.

1:24:24 Adam Okay. Well, that's it.

1:24:25 Drew We're just saying the same thing over and over.

1:24:26 Adam Age difference. All right.

1:24:28 Caller Am I answering my own question?

1:24:29 Adam Yeah. You're done. Yeah. Stop wasting your time.

1:24:32 Caller Okay.

1:24:32 Adam And you're not doing him any favors at 29. If he's 29 and he's looking to get married, you're not doing him any favors by stretching this thing out another eight months before you then ultimately move away. All right. Where the hell are we going to take a break?

1:24:47 Drew Yeah.

1:24:48 Adam So someone. Listen, here's what I need. I need to find a picture of Harry Reims and Geraldo Rivera. And I need to find Carlos from The Flying Nun.

1:24:56 Drew Alejandro Rey.

1:24:57 Adam Alejandro Rey.

1:24:59 Drew Alejandro Rey, yes.

1:25:00 Adam And John Leslie. We got to find someone.

1:25:03 Caller Well, we can get this on the Internet very quickly.

1:25:05 Adam Do you know how to work a computer?

1:25:07 Caller No.

1:25:08 Adam You can't just bang it with your dork and get it to do something?

1:25:10 Caller I think that might work.

1:25:12 Adam Wait, wait, wait.

1:25:12 Drew I can tell you. You can get Alejandro's picture. Uh-oh. Oh, no, you can't.

1:25:17 Adam Okay. Let's try to figure this out. That's a good idea. You're the king of that, Drew.

1:25:24 Caller Now, this is wonderful.

1:25:27 Adam Joe, you'll be glad to know I had a 40-minute conversation with the pilot about the Fiesta snack mix on the flight today. By the way.

1:25:35 Caller Where were you coming from?

1:25:36 Adam And I hate that crap. They only serve it on planes and it disgusts me. But here's a nice little tidbit. The pilot of the flight I took from Vegas tonight.

1:25:47 Caller Yeah.

1:25:48 Adam Hot chick. Hot chick pilot. Captain, not co-pilot, navigator. Captain of the 737, I flew from Vegas tonight. Young, hot chick. It was real. It was like a porn movie, Ron. It's the only time I've seen a chick in a uniform who was hot.

1:26:08 Caller Let me get political for a second. Did the door of the cockpit look any stronger to you than it looked in the past?

1:26:13 Adam No.

1:26:15 Caller What's going on with that?

1:26:16 Drew Certain airlines.

1:26:16 Adam Meanwhile, the chick who's flying the plane is all of 118 pounds and her back is turned to whoever the Shiite is who's flying in behind her. Let me just say this real fast. I know Ron is going to appreciate this.

1:26:30 Caller I'm going to make a comment, too, by the way.

1:26:31 Adam As an ex-carpenter and basically handyman and fix-it man and a jack of all trades, for 50 bucks in a six-pack of Heineken, I could retrofit a plane quite easily. Now, I wouldn't do it according to FAA regulations, but I could do something that would keep a guy out for five good kicks before I, from first class drunk, got this guy in a good bear hug. But no, they got to, it's five years and 50 million dollars for the FAA to get all the paperwork done and retrofit every plane. It drives me nuts. One of those New York sticks. You know, in New York, there's on the doors, just a bar that leans down against the thing. One of those is gonna stop a guy for a few kicks until a bunch of pastors come up and tackle it.

1:27:15 Caller LL planes in Israel have never had these problems, because you have to get in from the other, outside the plane.

1:27:20 Adam Hold on one second, though. I'm sorry we're running late for break. I know I said my piece, and you got a piece to say, too. So we'll take our break, and then we'll come back, and we'll praise the Israelis.

1:27:29 Caller I got some great advice with the airline industry.

1:27:31 Adam All right, right after this.

1:27:36 Caller I'm back in a minute.

1:28:09 Adam Hey, y'all. It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew. Talking in-flight safety with porn star Ron Jeremy. What an eclectic life I have.

1:28:21 Caller Tell them what I said.

1:28:22 Adam Chicken, a man, a man, a man.

1:28:26 Caller I'm singing.

1:28:37 Adam I don't want to spit on Ron. I'm scared to open my mouth too wide in front of Ron.

1:28:43 Caller I'll find a sign saying, insert here, right?

1:28:45 Drew What did you tell him during the break, Ron?

1:28:47 Caller Tell him, Adam.

1:28:48 Adam Well, okay. Well, we'll tell him together. Ron was suggesting that there be, here was Ron's theory and it's an interesting one.

1:28:56 Caller Look, let's face the facts. The way things are now, no hijacker could ever get away with it because the passengers are going to kill him. I mean, there's no one's going to sit back. Two hundred ladies could kill four guys with knives, right?

1:29:05 Drew That's right.

1:29:06 Caller Now, you've taken over the plane, now what? Even if you could fly a Cessna or Piper Cup or a Layman, you cannot get behind a cockpit and know what to do. Everyone says that. I've talked to pilots. Why don't they teach us, like they always teach you, the exits are over here. Here's the flotation device. First of all, a water landing is probably death. So if they teach you how to take your seat cushion to use as a flotation device, why don't they tell everybody, in case of an emergency, this is how you get ground control on the phone. That's it. Here's how you get ground control. If you're behind a cockpit, the diagram on the pamphlet that you have in front of your seat will show you how to get communication because then hopefully, ground control could show you how to set. There's actually autopilot for landing on some planes. You've got a fighting chance.

1:29:46 Adam A lot of them.

1:29:46 Caller Pennsylvania would still be here today. Right now, even stewardesses and flight attendants do not even know how to press the certain frequency buttons to get ground control on the phone. Then hopefully, you've got a fighting chance of being talked down.

1:29:59 Adam Here's what I thought.

1:30:00 Caller Is that so tough to teach? It's so simple.

1:30:02 Adam I told Ron they would never do this because of the confidence factor. It just-

1:30:06 Caller Why? Look at the water landing. It's another joke.

1:30:09 Adam They would not put a diagram on how to contact the tower if the pilots had coronary-

1:30:13 Caller You don't say it like that.

1:30:15 Adam All right. But listen-

1:30:16 Caller In case of emergencies, here's how you get communication.

1:30:19 Adam I'll tell you how-

1:30:19 Caller What's so hot about that?

1:30:20 Adam Let me tell you how it would happen.

1:30:21 Caller Everyone should know that.

1:30:22 Adam I told Ron, I do believe that the stewardesses, all of them should be trained in some rudimentary communication and all that kind of stuff.

1:30:30 Caller I asked them today. They are not trained for that.

1:30:32 Adam Here's how it would happen now. Somebody would pick up a phone, a cell phone or a flight phone just like they did. Yeah, they'd call somebody and someone would call them.

1:30:42 Caller You're high enough on the ground, no cell phones hardly ever work. Those phones or the GTE air phones hardly ever work.

1:30:46 Adam Well, they work, but it'd be too big argument over whose credit card they were going to use.

1:30:51 Caller Dr. Drew, the scenario being in case of there's a hijacking, tens of other pilots gone. So you might retake the plane and then what? Dead 200, what is so tough about teaching people, this is a button you press to get their ground control to get on the phone. I think it's so simple and so easy.

1:31:06 Adam I completely agree with you that all the stewardesses should know this.

1:31:09 Caller That too.

1:31:10 Adam I disagree on the part. I mean, I don't disagree. I just say it's never going to happen, putting the extra pamphlet in the back of the seat.

1:31:17 Caller No, just add a little diagram to the pamphlet we already have. Showing the buttons that you press.

1:31:20 Adam That's not going to happen.

1:31:21 Drew But attorney's liability.

1:31:22 Adam Yeah, there's eight stewardesses, give them the info. But someone would pick up a phone, call somebody and it would route around.

1:31:29 Caller Get to ground control?

1:31:30 Adam Yes.

1:31:31 Caller I'd love to see that happen. But if that happens, you're going to crash into something.

1:31:35 Adam They could do it. They could have done it on these flights, these fatal flights over Pennsylvania. They were talking to loved ones and stuff. They could have worked that out.

1:31:42 Caller Well, in that case, they did.

1:31:44 Adam But I do agree with that, Ron, not a bad idea, especially stewardesses. You ready to go?

1:31:49 Drew Can we turn off the show?

1:31:50 Adam Yeah, what are we talking to?

1:31:52 Caller You got a call here?

1:31:54 Drew Let's just get this one out. Brian, 21.

1:31:56 Hello.

1:31:57 Adam Brian, you're 21. Yeah, for the past three days, you've had stomach pains.

1:32:02 Caller Yes, yes, I have. How are you fellas doing?

1:32:05 Adam Good. What is that, Drew?

1:32:06 Caller Well, actually, see, I am 21, and I took all my health classes back in college.

1:32:13 Drew Where is your pain?

1:32:13 Caller Where is your pain?

1:32:14 Drew Dr. Brian, where is the pain?

1:32:16 Caller It's more so in the lower abdomen and lower back area.

1:32:20 Drew Which side?

1:32:21 Caller Right in the middle.

1:32:22 Drew Right in the middle. Well, it says on the screen here, you're worried about testicular cancer. There are thousands of other causes of abdominal pain. Testicular cancer does not typically present a pain. It typically is that you find something in the testes, so it's a hard, rock-like swelling. Abdominal pain in there could be anything from appendix to constipation to divertion. It could be a ton of things.

1:32:40 Adam All right, go to the doctor.

1:32:41 Caller Shouldn't you see a doctor?

1:32:42 Adam Yes, I gotta get a check down.

1:32:43 Drew Real quick. It could be bladder, prostate, it could even be kidney stone.

1:32:46 Adam Good, fine. Don?

1:32:47 Caller Yes, hello.

1:32:47 Adam Yes, more importantly.

1:32:49 Caller How's it going?

1:32:49 Adam Good.

1:32:51 Caller I worked in a hotel once, where you stayed at once, up in Santa Barbara, and I worked there as a night auditor once, and just wanted to say what's up, and I brought you a picture of H2O.

1:32:59 Adam Thank you.

1:33:00 Caller You're very welcome. You made me laugh a lot. But a question to Ron, however, this isn't to offend you or anything, but I heard that-

1:33:06 Caller I thrive on these things.

1:33:09 Drew Ron is easily offended, by the way.

1:33:12 Caller I thrive on insults. Go ahead.

1:33:13 Caller Okay. Well, I've seen you in a club before, in a restaurant also as well, and my name is Don, and the guys started to call me Don Jeremy, because I look like you kind of, but the-

1:33:24 Adam Hey, Don, I don't care if they call you Don Ho. Ask the question.

1:33:27 Caller Either way, but it's like, I heard-

1:33:29 Caller My sister, Amaho.

1:33:30 Caller That Ron, you sucked yourself off in a film once?

1:33:33 Caller Not to completion, but I'm able to kiss, I can kiss myself where the sun don't shine.

1:33:38 Adam No, yeah.

1:33:39 Caller That's called autofelatio.

1:33:40 Adam Yeah, he didn't, no, not in his mouth. He came on his chest.

1:33:43 Caller No, I didn't do that either. Actually, I kissed him. I made sure to wear a rubber, because I know where he's been. I gave myself a wrong phone number, so I wouldn't call me anymore.

1:33:50 Adam Now, can you do that standing up, or do you gotta lie down and put your ass against the door?

1:33:55 Caller I can do it in any position, standing up. I gained weight, so now I can just kiss the tip. Right.

1:34:01 Adam I'll tell you, well, Ron has an unusually long penis, and unusually short-

1:34:06 Caller I was a gymnast in school, on a short torso, too.

1:34:07 Adam Short torso, so it's a very dangerous get-it-your-junk combination.

1:34:11 Caller On a more important note, though, Dr. Drew.

1:34:13 Drew Yeah, right.

1:34:14 Caller They've said, and the doctor has said, the guy was a testicular cancer. The man's biggest fear is prostate cancer, correct? One of the biggest killers among older men, correct?

1:34:24 Ron Jeremy Yeah, yeah.

1:34:25 Adam Hold on.

1:34:25 Caller Tomatoes.

1:34:26 Adam Hold on, hold on.

1:34:26 Caller They say tomatoes are very good to avoid that happening?

1:34:29 Adam Hold on, hold on, hold on. All of you shut up. We're ten minutes late for break. Ron, you have a question you can ask Drew off the air. We've got to take a break.

1:34:37 Caller Oh, I'll figure the public should hear that.

1:34:38 Adam Well, I'm sorry. We'll be back.

1:34:40 Caller Okay, so I know there's nothing wrong with me.

1:34:42 Caller So what's up?

1:34:47 Caller But I tried everything else and thought, what the hell?

1:34:49 Caller So I called the dateline and actually met a cool guy.

1:34:51 Caller I called the dateline and I hooked up with some cool people.

1:34:53 Caller Believe it or not, other normal people are out there looking too.

1:34:55 Drew 877-889-DATE.

1:34:59 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:35:34 Adam Well, that's the show. I want to thank Ron Jeremy for coming in here tonight, and tell you all who are out here in Los Angeles, and those of you in New York who want to go out and see the documentary, Porn Star, The Legend of Ron Jeremy. Sounds absolutely fascinating.

1:35:49 Caller It is at the New Art Theater here in Los Angeles. Showtime is 7.30 and 9.30. And in New York City, it's at the Cinema Village in downtown Manhattan.

1:35:57 Adam Go out and support the arts is what I want to say. Ron has brought you a lot of pleasure over the years. Now go see his film.

1:36:05 Caller It's entertaining.

1:36:07 Adam I'll tell you just the story of it sounded great.

1:36:10 Caller We got Critics Choice in LA Weekly. Which is tough. The New York Times, they give it four stars and they're tough on things like this.

1:36:16 Adam I want to thank producer Ann for doing a great job in booking A-list celebrities like Ron Jeremy all week and all year. I want to thank Damien for doing a great job on the phone. I want to thank Tara Don't Call Me Tar Goddammit for doing a great job and producer Anderson of course for working with.

1:36:35 Drew Producer Anderson.

1:36:36 Adam Oh sorry. Wow. Little slip there. What is the? Engineer Anderson for doing a great job on the board.

1:36:43 Drew Producer Ann right?

1:36:44 Adam All week long yes. I mentioned her already.

1:36:46 Drew And I'll see you in Tucson Saturday.

1:36:48 Caller I'm going to see you guys at the Acoustic Christmas again.

1:36:50 Adam Yes.

1:36:51 Caller What is that actually?

1:36:53 Adam That week and a half. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying Mahalo.

1:36:59 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Thursday, November 29, 2001