Episode 1000754886911

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:12 Adam Number 1-800-LLVE-191, Dr. Drew, Board Certified Physician, Addiction Medicine Specialist. Mix Master Mike is here, the man who's been playing with the Beastie Boys for many years now. He's going to be in studio tonight. He's coming from San Francisco. They were socked in, but I heard he landed here in LA.

1:35 Drew He's on his way to the studio.

1:36 Adam And we ain't too far from LAX. So he's in route. So he should be here momentarily. And you know what I like? I got some questions. I got a list here that says, here are some questions you might want to ask Mike, nice, which I never I never get. But I'm more than willing to work off this page.

1:56 Drew Like a real radio show.

1:58 Adam Yeah.

1:58 Drew Wow.

1:59 Adam What's your favorite moment on the road? Shut up. How'd you hook up with the Beastie Boys? There's one I'd like to know. How'd you get your start behind the turntable? All questions that will be answered when Mix Master Mike comes into the studio. His new CD, Spin Cycle, will be out Tuesday, the 11th. It's coming Tuesday. And he's going to do a sign in over at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset. That's coming up on Monday. And we'll get in all that with him as soon as he walks in here. Drew? You all right?

2:30 Drew Yeah. You?

2:31 Adam You ready to rock?

2:31 Drew Yeah.

2:32 Adam Yeah, I'm ready to roll. All right. Carrie?

2:36 Yes?

2:37 Adam You're 16?

2:39 Caller Yes.

2:40 Adam What's up?

2:40 Caller When I last moved to Virginia, we didn't use protection. So I went and got the morning after PO the next day.

2:47 Drew Fabulous.

2:48 Caller It's by Prevan.

2:49 Drew Prevan. Yeah, good. Excellent.

2:51 Caller And then I took it twice.

2:54 Drew Yeah.

2:55 Caller But at the same, I mean, I took two at the same time. And then I took one another 12 hours later.

3:03 Adam Well, did you take it how they told you to take it?

3:05 Caller No, it's supposed to be one and then 12 hours later, take another one.

3:09 Adam Why did you do it the way you did it?

3:11 Caller I was in a rush. I was supposed to be at work at 11 and I mean, I was supposed to be at work at 10 and I got there at 11.

3:18 Drew How did you get three pills?

3:20 Caller They give you a pack of four so you can use it twice.

3:23 Adam Nice. All right. So you essentially...

3:25 Drew I gotta tell you, I always thought it was, and I could be wrong as I haven't opened up Prevan Package in a long time, but I thought that you took two and then two 12 hours later.

3:32 Caller That's what I thought because I've been listening to you guys for a long time and that's what I had thought, but I was wrong.

3:38 Drew That they give you two separate doses, a comeback in case you want to slip up again?

3:45 Caller Yeah, that's what I had read in the paper.

3:48 Adam Well, good, why not? Listen, band-aids don't just come with one in the box, they come with a few.

3:52 Drew I could have sworn it was two and then two more.

3:54 Adam I thought that. Listen, who cares what you think?

3:56 Drew Let's go get one, open it up.

3:58 Adam Okay, here's my point. I don't understand why you couldn't have taken one with you to work. Is it a big bill?

4:04 Drew But the point is, from the standpoint of where you think you were supposed to have taken it, you just took too much.

4:09 Caller Yeah.

4:09 Drew That's fine. Too much is okay. Too little is the problem.

4:12 Caller But then I had unprotected sex again last night and then...

4:16 Adam That's why they give you two.

4:18 Caller But I had one in the package. Yeah. So I took...

4:23 Adam Hold on a second. You know, talking to Carrie sounds like talking to a seven-year-old about what they got for Christmas, except for we're talking about birth control, you know? And I had a sock and it had candy in it and then there was... I got a train. Doesn't it? It's just kind of surreal.

4:43 Drew I took this pill and I didn't get pregnant.

4:47 Adam So I threw the pills outside in a beanstalk, Drew, and I climbed it and there was a giant up there and a goose. Carrie?

4:56 Caller Yeah.

4:56 Adam All right, baby.

4:59 Caller I love you. You are such a poop. A poop? A pimp.

5:03 Adam Pimp. That's good, Drew. Okay. So now you had unprotected sex again and now you only have one pill left.

5:10 Caller I took previn and then I took protection B.

5:15 Drew Plan B.

5:16 Caller Is that okay?

5:16 Drew Yeah, that's fine.

5:17 Caller Okay.

5:18 Drew You should be fine. I love you, Carrie. You have all the different morning after pills available. No matter what the brand is, you keep it around. But listen, how about getting a more sort of free meditated birth control?

5:32 Caller Yeah, I want to know the difference between depo and regular birth control and which one is better?

5:39 Drew Well, the depo, it sounds like for you, Carrie, might be more of the trick.

5:42 Adam The other one requires you taking a pill every day.

5:45 Drew Yeah, every day at the same time exactly and not missing any ever.

5:50 Caller Which one?

5:51 Drew All the pills. The depo, you just take a shot and you're good for three months.

5:55 Caller Yeah, but what's the side effects of depo?

5:57 Drew The depo, you bleed a lot the first three months and then you don't bleed at all after that. And you get a little sort of irritable and sometimes depression, sometimes some drop in libido. That's about it. Some women don't notice it at all.

6:11 Adam All right. You need to get on the one that takes the least thinking.

6:14 Drew Yeah, it is the one for which the improvement in teen pregnancy is being blamed on, being felt to be responsible as the depoproversion.

6:23 Adam Right, which is good. Amanda?

6:25 Yeah.

6:25 Adam You're 18?

6:26 Caller Yep.

6:26 Adam What's up?

6:28 Caller Okay.

6:30 Well, I've had a boyfriend for over two and a half years now, and he's really great. And the only problem is, is that I have never had an orgasm or felt any sexual pleasure in any way.

6:45 Drew And, Do you see how she said orgasm?

6:48 Caller What's that?

6:48 Drew Did you notice that accent?

6:50 Adam Yeah. Minnesota?

6:51 Drew Yeah. Then sort of in Chicago in that area.

6:53 Adam Right.

6:54 Drew And I remember the girl last night who said that she was from Virginia.

6:58 Adam Yeah.

6:58 Drew Had the same accent.

7:00 Adam I know, Drew. Now be quiet. Let's try to get through some calls. Amanda, I'm sorry you've never had an orgasm. Yeah. And you say, not only no orgasm, but no sexual pleasure?

7:11 Caller And you know, I tell people this and they like, look at me like, no. And so I went to my gynecologist and, you know, I talked to her about this and she like, kind of was like, well, we can't know that unless we run some tests and all this. And she gave me a number for a sexual dysfunction doctor. And, you know, so I don't really want to go jumping into this because I'm only, you know, 18 and, you know, I'm freshman year in college.

7:35 Adam Well, are you in love with your boyfriend? Yes. And shouldn't you get a certain amount of satisfaction just out of the intimacy that you two experience?

7:43 Caller No, that's where the problem comes in because, you know, we're so close. You know, he understands complete well, you know.

7:50 Drew No, no, no, you're missing the point, I think.

7:52 What's that?

7:53 Adam Don't you get a satisfaction of just being close to him and intimate with him? I mean, there's a lot of women can't have an orgasm, but they enjoy that aspect of it.

8:02 Caller Yeah, but see, that's where my problem comes in. Yes, your question, yes. But, you know, the thing is, is I do want to do it. You know, I get, you know, aroused and I get totally into it and we start and I, since it feels like nothing, you know, I, you know, kind of lose interest.

8:21 Drew It's interesting. I find it's interesting, Amanda, that even in talking to you, there's a disconnect.

8:27 Adam You know what I'm saying?

8:28 Drew You go in one direction, there's this disconnect and she starts going off her own direction.

8:31 Adam Right, your brain is disconnected from your vagina and your mouth is disconnected from your brain.

8:35 Drew It's all disconnected.

8:36 Adam Everything is disconnected.

8:37 Drew Yeah, it's all disconnected from our feelings. This is the bottom line here. Now, a common way that that kind of disconnect occurs is some sort of trauma.

8:47 Caller No, I was not sexually abused. I was not. No, my family is great. And honestly, you can ask me all these things. I've been fine my whole life.

8:57 Adam Are your parents like Mormon or Jehovah's Witness or something? They're very religious, they're cold?

9:04 Caller See, they hadn't been my whole life. And I guess now that they're starting to get into Christian anymore, but that hasn't really affected me at all. I mean, I'm into religion myself.

9:14 Drew Are you on any medication?

9:16 Caller Now I'm on, oh, they switched me so many, because I had bad cramps. So I got on birth control when I was like 16. And, you know, none of them worked. So they kept switching me from pill to pill to pill. And now I think I'm on Zovia.

9:31 Drew Zovia?

9:32 Adam What?

9:32 Drew Wait a minute. Zovia.

9:33 Adam What's that Russian gymnast? 72 Olympics?

9:38 Drew What's in Zovia?

9:38 Adam Oh, she probably just made it up.

9:39 Drew There's a new one. There's a new one. Yasmin. That's a guy with a big, heavy progesterone. But listen, Adam.

9:44 Adam She was on Baywatch.

9:45 Drew I think, Amanda, I really believe this, that not enough emphasis is put on the way these hormones influence women. And I really am increasingly convinced that it's different for different women how they're influenced by estrogen or progesterone. But some of these chemicals, some of these hormones can really profoundly influence your libido.

10:05 Caller I actually thought about that. But then I've been having this problem before I even got on the hole.

10:10 Adam Yeah, but what religion are you getting into?

10:13 Caller Well, I have been a Christian.

10:15 Adam You said you're getting into it again, though?

10:18 Caller No. See, my parents always kind of not, they were in Christianity, but then they kind of fell out of it through the years. And, you know, I was introduced to it more in my high school years. And since then, I've been kind of going, you know, researching it, trying to find.

10:34 Adam But what do you do you think you have some problem with having sex and being in a Christianity?

10:40 Caller Well, that's that's my problem with Christianity. But see, that doesn't you know, that's my problem with, oh, well, am I really a Christian? But because I do want to do that. And that's just a choice that I've chosen. But the catch is that, you know, with my boyfriend, you know, whom I love very much and he loves me, he, you know, he feels that he's not satisfying me and he thinks it's his fault, but I feel it's my fault. And, you know, I feel bad. And then because...

11:07 Adam Oh, Andrew, what was my original question? She's so up in her head, it's like, it's crazy.

11:12 Drew Yeah, yeah.

11:13 Adam She needs to do a bong load and have a glass of wine and just get effed for a change. She's all over the place. Just imagine having sex with her. She's talking the whole way and trying to find her orgasm and telling you she can't feel anything. And then reading the Bible halfway into it. She's all up in her head. I don't want to sound like a hippie here, but you know what I'm saying? I could get zero connection from her. I keep trying to talk to her and it's like, she's all over the place.

11:42 Drew And I really, a place for her to start is, listen, maybe less progesterone, more estrogen in the pills you're taking. Try maybe a triphasic pill and then why all the pelvic pain and focus on all that if that's really not an issue for you.

11:54 Adam Okay, and listen, start embracing Satan for now. This Jesus thing's not working out for you, man. You're doing too much thinking and not enough feeling. Just close your eyes, drink half a bottle of red wine and try to get into the, put on some Marvin Gaye, would you? Trust me. Okay. She's angry, too, and weird.

12:12 Drew I think it is reasonable for you to talk to one of these sexual dysfunction folks, because this is a significant issue for you and I think it may be these pills you're on. It really might be.

12:20 Adam All right. She has some energy. Melissa?

12:24 Yes.

12:25 Adam You're 32?

12:27 Caller Yes.

12:27 Adam What's up?

12:31 Caller I am in a really bad place.

12:36 Adam You're in Detroit?

12:39 Caller No.

12:40 Drew All right.

12:44 Caller To give you a little background, I've been severely depressed since I was a pretty young kid. And I have thought suicidal feelings on a daily basis.

13:02 Drew Have you been treated for that?

13:05 Caller I have tried every method of treatment available.

13:09 Drew You've had ECT?

13:11 Caller ECT as well.

13:12 Drew When was that last time?

13:13 Adam That's electroshock therapy.

13:15 Drew Yeah.

13:16 Caller And it did nothing. If anything, it made me worse.

13:19 Drew You finished a course of ECT?

13:22 Caller No, actually, I stopped it prematurely because I was losing such large chunks of my memory.

13:29 Drew Well, here's how ECT works. For the first six treatments, you get worse and the memory can be profound. And somewhere around 10, you'll start improving and the memory problems get better. So if you stop midstream, it's going to be worse. You've not had that form of treatment yet.

13:45 Adam And at 145, you reach nirvana.

13:48 Drew No, no, no. But the point is you've not really had a course at that yet. So that's one thing you've not tried.

13:52 Adam Well, let's try to figure out why you're so depressed.

13:55 Caller Do you have any friends? My family is like one of the most screwed up families on the face of the earth.

14:03 Adam Yeah. Well, let's see.

14:04 Caller Both of my parents were mentally ill and never sought treatment, never got any kind of help or medication.

14:12 Adam Well, let's focus on the positive here for a second. Football season starting Sunday. That's the number one. You have any, you have anything you like? Anything you like to do? Any music you like?

14:25 Caller Yeah, I like music, but I don't.

14:27 Adam You have any kids?

14:29 Caller No.

14:29 Adam You have a, you have an old man? That's good. Do you have an old man?

14:33 Caller No.

14:34 Adam You like guys?

14:36 Caller Not anymore.

14:37 Adam You like girls?

14:38 Caller No.

14:41 Adam You have any friends?

14:42 Caller No, I don't. I have no friends. I have no family. I have no coworkers.

14:47 Adam Well, what do you do? Well, do you work?

14:49 Caller No, I'm disabled because of my depression.

14:52 Drew How about working and getting some friends? Or some kind of support from someone?

15:01 Caller I'm just too messed up in my head after 18 plus years of chronic mental abuse.

15:10 Adam Well, here's the thing, Melissa. I don't want to make things worse than they are, but you got a bad shake in life. You're like somebody got in a horrible accident when you were five years old.

15:23 Drew That's right.

15:23 Adam The van rolled and you weren't wearing your seatbelt, you went through the windshield kind of thing. Now, your life is a life of rehab. Now, that doesn't mean you can't have a marriage. It doesn't mean you can't have kids. It doesn't mean you can't enjoy yourself, but it means there's work. You have a disability and you got to work.

15:40 Drew I know it feels like it would be better if you did have a spinal cord injury, but the reality is this is more treatable. If you really stay with the work and stay connected with people.

15:50 Adam Yeah. Medication, therapy, all that stuff.

15:53 Caller I am as connected to the two of you as I am to anyone on the face of the planet right now.

15:59 Adam Well, thanks.

16:00 Caller And...

16:02 Adam Listen, you know we're geniuses, right?

16:05 Caller Yes, I was aware of that.

16:07 Adam Okay, so we have all the answers and the answer is work. I mean, and it's hard to...

16:12 Drew Well, the answer is people.

16:13 Adam All right, what's going on over there?

16:15 Caller I've been working on this now for a good 15 years.

16:20 Adam Well, you're due then. I mean, look, here's the problem. When you're depressed, the first thing that goes is your energy. And when you have no energy, it's hard to work at something.

16:28 Drew When you're hopeless, when you don't have any hope that things will be effective, it's hard.

16:33 Adam Yeah, but it's really... You feel fatigued all the time.

16:36 Drew And hopeless.

16:37 Caller Well, I don't know if I can...

16:39 Adam What's your major point?

16:40 Caller Say this on the air.

16:42 Adam Is it the F word?

16:43 Caller No, it's not as bad like that. But, you know, I just think that there are some people that have had enough pain and are screwed up enough in their head because of their parents and enough sheer terror and anguish that the the most humane thing you can do for them, you know, or for them to do is to commit suicide.

17:16 Adam Yeah, I'm with you. But I don't think that's you.

17:20 Caller I don't look at it as harming myself. I look at it as actually helping myself.

17:26 Drew A, I would agree with Adam that both of us get something from you, that you have something there. It's not like you're completely vacant. You're empty. You're just done. You're there. You're alive. You're real. And that deserves a chance at life. It really does. And B, I've not met that person that's truly untreatable. I've met plenty of people that are chronic and recurrent, but I've not met that person that has no capacity to respond to treatment.

17:52 Adam Didn't you marry her? That's your wife you're talking about.

17:55 Drew Nice.

17:56 Caller I've seen a zillion therapists and psychiatrists, and I'm all out of money after all the therapy.

18:05 Adam All right. Listen, how about my therapy? You get up early and go for a five-mile walk every morning and listen to a bunch of classical music.

18:12 Drew Maybe go to some 12-step meetings, just try to get connected that way.

18:15 Adam No, it's going to take more than 12 steps to walk five miles. You got to just start walking and listening to classical music. Listen, I know it sounds too easy and retarded. You show me a person who can scrape their sorry, depressed ass out of bed every morning at 7.30 and go for a walk or a jog for a few miles and listen to some Beethoven. And I'm going to show you a person who's on their way to recovery. If you can get yourself to do that, you can do it. I mean, you can fix yourself. Why can't you just do that, Drew? Just get up and go for a walk, get a walk, man. Get some headphones and go for a walk and listen to a bunch of classical music.

18:53 Drew Because depression is probably a constellation of problems.

18:56 Adam You can't move.

18:57 Drew It's not a single illness. You had one kind, I had one kind. There's all kinds of depression. I true that I used to deal with it by working out in the morning.

19:05 Adam That's what you got to do. You have to do... Here's the key to success in life. Don't do anything you want to do and do everything you don't feel like doing.

19:15 Drew Immediately.

19:15 Adam You will be tremendously successful. All right. I'm going to go whack off and take a nap.

19:21 Drew Because you don't want to do that.

19:23 Adam Well, I don't know. That's right. See, Drew, you got to pick early what you don't want to do. And then you went on to...

19:28 Drew Obviously, you must have heeded the idea of masturbation and napping.

19:31 Adam That's right. All right. We're going to take a little break. Mix Master Mike is on his way from the airport or so we're told. When we come back, we're going to speak to Melissa, who's overly horny and her boyfriend can only do her once in a while. She wants to know what to do. Let me just say hi to her. Melissa?

19:50 Hello?

19:50 Adam Are you extra horny?

19:52 Yeah.

19:53 Adam Your boyfriend only gives you sex once a month?

19:57 Around something like that.

19:58 Adam All right. So you just say yes? All right. Hold on. Hold on. We'll take a little break. We'll get back after this.

20:06 Hello. This is your radio.

20:08 Adam Radio.

20:09 Caller Loveline will be right back.

20:14 Adam Hey, everybody. It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-LOVE-191. Mix Master Mike is from the Beastie Boys, or with the Beastie Boys, is going to be in here. As soon as he gets here from LAX, he was coming from San Francisco, ran into a little weather. It, I guess, got socked in over there, as has been known to happen. And, yeah, bad times. I missed a flight or two that went through there in my day, although no one believed me, Drew. Okay, let's not live in the past. Let's go back.

20:52 Drew Oh, you're talking about going to Oregon?

20:54 Adam Yeah.

20:55 Drew They do not believe you. It's that you didn't spend five minutes trying to reroute. You got back in your car and went home.

21:01 Adam Drew, I've won over this with you and my management.

21:07 Drew Let's not get into it.

21:08 Adam Way more than once, jackass.

21:09 Drew 5,000 people in a basketball stadium. It's all right. Let them sit there. Oh, no. Put me out there by myself.

21:15 Adam Listen, I went to many other airline desks and asked them how to get there, and they all had flights that were taken off or booked. It wasn't working. I went home. That's what they all told me. Hold on a second. How dare you? What do you think I want to do? Go down to LAX, walk around in a circle for an hour, and then go home for no pay? You think that's part of my plan? All right, then.

21:39 Drew But I called a few people, and there were ways to get you there by nine.

21:44 Adam Yeah. There were not. I was leaving at 4 o'clock in the afternoon. The gig was at like 8, and it was socked in, San Francisco was. I went to Alaska. I went to two other airlines, and they said, it's not working. Jackass. I'm tired of explaining myself on this one. Mix Master Mike's in the studio.

22:08 How are you?

22:11 Adam Good to meet you.

22:12 Mix Master Mike Good to meet you too.

22:13 Drew We're yelling about airlines.

22:14 Mix Master Mike Oh, okay. Fresh from the airport right now.

22:17 Adam You got socked in in San Francisco?

22:18 Drew Yeah, I was just saying that never happens.

22:21 Adam He was being facetious. You know, I rarely do this, but Mike, his bio came with a list of questions you might want to ask him, and I thought, why do any work when I have a list here I can look at? So, I'm going to ask you the questions based on these lists. I've checked a few off if you want to examine them.

22:43 Drew Don't even ask him, just hand them to him.

22:44 Adam Okay, that's better.

22:46 Drew You really don't want to do any work.

22:47 Adam Hey, Mike, I'm going to take a leak. If you could just read the question and then answer it, that'd be great.

22:54 Mix Master Mike So you want me to interview myself?

22:56 Adam Well, essentially, yeah, I don't like to think of it that way, but yeah, I'll throw in a question or two, but go ahead, start at the top.

23:04 Mix Master Mike Okay, how did I get started behind the turntables?

23:07 Adam How did you get started behind the turntables?

23:09 Drew Why is it a question?

23:10 Mix Master Mike Well, in 1985, I was watching a concert with Herbie Hancock and Grand Mixer DST, and they were performing the song Rocket, if you guys remember.

23:20 Adam Is that boom, boom, boom, boom? Wait a minute, which one is that? I can't remember. The one from Beverly Hills Cop or the...

23:29 Mix Master Mike No, that's Axl F. That's Axl Foley's theme. No, but yeah, I watched this concert live with Grand Mixer DST on the turntables, and after watching him scratch some records on the turntables, I was like, yo, that's what I want to be.

23:44 Adam I can never figure out why the thing doesn't swipe all the way down the record. I mean, why doesn't it skip and why doesn't it hop? You put a couple of nickels on it or something?

23:55 Mix Master Mike No, there's like special needles called the M447 Shurs that you put it on the vinyl and it just kind of like stays there like a magnet. So it's like a magnet to the groove.

24:06 Adam Oh, really?

24:07 Mix Master Mike It stays. When you move the record back and forth, it just stays on that one particular groove and you could just go berserk.

24:14 Adam And so how do you get started? How do you practice at this?

24:19 Mix Master Mike You basically, you just got to have like an artillery of vinyl.

24:25 Adam Well, I mean, when you, after watching Herbie Hancock, you went home that night, right?

24:30 Mix Master Mike I went home that night.

24:31 Adam You beat off and then?

24:32 Mix Master Mike No, I didn't beat off.

24:34 Adam You went home and you got it out of the day. I don't play over it.

24:38 Then you got a turntable.

24:40 Adam That's right. Oh, that's right. I went home.

24:42 Mix Master Mike You're the one I beat off.

24:43 Adam That's right.

24:45 Mix Master Mike No, no, I went and got some.

24:47 You beat off? Right.

24:48 Mix Master Mike No, dude, I went to go get some vinyl and I put it on the record and I put it on the turntable and I start moving it back and forth in my own way. So, yeah, I grabbed like a drum solo off of a Hendrix record.

25:01 Right.

25:01 Mix Master Mike And I replayed the whole song, the whole Foxy Lady theme with scratching.

25:07 Adam And do you need two turntables to do it?

25:11 Mix Master Mike Yes. Well, two, three, whatever suits you best, you know, I use two turntables.

25:16 Adam Yes, I would know. Is your right hand better in your left hand?

25:20 Mix Master Mike I'm kind of like, amodextrous, kind of like about both ways. So, you know, left, right, whatever.

25:26 Adam What's the next question on there?

25:28 Mix Master Mike How did I hook up with the Beastie Boys?

25:29 Adam Right, right. Good question.

25:31 Mix Master Mike Well, yeah. 1997. Well, I met Adam Yac at a Roxanne anniversary in 1996, and we exchanged phone numbers and gave him my business card. He gave me his number and we used to keep in contact. And after that, within a year, I left like four messages when he wasn't home. Like scratch messages, like, yo, Adam, check it out. This is the Tweek scratch. And I left it on his answering machine. And so he was just like flabbergasted by it. Yeah, he liked it. Called me back and was like, yo, we're working on a new album called Hello Nasty. And would you like to be a part of it? I was like, sure, fly me out there. And that was it.

26:07 Adam So you went out to New York.

26:08 Mix Master Mike Yeah. So they flew me out to New York. And we had a whole session for like two weeks. I worked on the Hello Nasty album and the rest is history.

26:16 Adam When you find a, I don't know, I mean, maybe it'd be like a guitar riff or something, but when you find a sound you like, isn't it? Is it hard to recreate sometimes?

26:26 Mix Master Mike No, no, actually, it's like the mixer is like, it's like a guitar string.

26:32 Adam Right.

26:32 Mix Master Mike The fader is like the guitar string. So it's like, you can like chop up different sounds with your, with like moving the fader back and forth, kind of like transforming it and cutting the song, cutting the song off and on. So it's like, it gives this transformer sound. So it's like, you're just like recreating it with the, with the mixer.

26:50 Drew Maybe we should hear a song.

26:52 Adam Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's a good idea. Yeah. Why don't we just, and then we'll, when we come back, we'll get to question.

26:58 Drew Seven.

26:59 Adam Number six, number six or seven there. All right. This is, now the CD is not out until the 11th, right? Yeah. Tuesday?

27:07 Mix Master Mike September 11th.

27:08 Adam Spin Cycles, the name of the CD. Mix Master Mike is the name of the artist. And this is called Three MCs and One DJ.

28:26 Caller Don't get mad when we got to go. We're just three. I'll take care of you.

29:30 Adam Mix Master Mike, the CD Spin Cycle is out this Tuesday. That is the 11th. Also, you can find Mix Master Mike over at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset Boulevard in Los Angeles starting at 8 o'clock. What did I say? Did I say the day already?

29:45 Mix Master Mike September 11th.

29:46 Adam That's right, the day before. That would be on Monday. You'll be signing advance copies?

29:50 Mix Master Mike Yep.

29:51 Adam Perfect. All right. We'll get to more of those questions as the night wears on and we'll get to some questions from our callers now. Melissa?

29:59 Hello?

29:59 Adam You're 16?

30:02 Caller 16, yeah.

30:03 Adam And you say you're extra horny? And your boyfriend only has sex with you once a month?

30:09 Caller For the most part, yeah.

30:10 Drew Once a month?

30:12 Adam Because he doesn't live around you?

30:14 Caller No, he lives out of town. Well, like a 45-minute drive.

30:18 Drew How old is he?

30:20 Caller 18.

30:21 Adam And does he have a car? And he can't, I'll tell you, when I was 18, if I had some 16-year-old who wanted it pretty bad, I would commandeer some wheels and make that 45-minute drive, which ain't a whole lot of driving, not for an 18-year-old with a boner. That's nothing. I could hop on my boner that distance when I was 18, like a pogo stick.

30:44 Caller Well, I haven't really voiced anything to him.

30:48 Adam All right.

30:49 Drew Well, are you sure this is your boyfriend?

30:51 Caller Yeah.

30:51 Drew You know what I mean? Maybe he doesn't sort of think of it the same way you do.

30:55 Caller Possibly.

30:56 Adam Well, shouldn't he be wanting to see you more than once a month?

30:59 Caller He wants to. He does see me more than once a month. It's just the sexual thing. It doesn't happen like very often.

31:07 Drew When it does happen, how is it?

31:08 Caller It's great.

31:09 Drew It's fine.

31:10 Adam Does he have his own?

31:11 Caller Not satisfying enough.

31:12 Adam Does he have his own place?

31:14 Caller No.

31:15 Drew Not satisfying enough. Is that what you said?

31:16 Adam Yeah.

31:17 Drew When you do have it?

31:19 Adam Do you have an orgasm?

31:21 Of course.

31:22 Adam All right. Well, I didn't know. A lot of folks don't. And do you masturbate?

31:28 Caller No.

31:29 Adam Maybe that would be your answer.

31:32 Caller I have no idea. I don't think it would be. I've tried it once, but not for me. It's not for her.

31:40 Adam Right. That's what I said after the first time I tried it. I was 35,000 episodes ago. I did think that for me. Actually, my first thought was no way I'm doing this more than once every couple of months. I can't commit to this kind of this kind of time. But I worked it out. Melissa.

31:58 Caller Yeah.

31:58 Adam Well, I think you got two choices. You either have to see him more often and, you know, have more intimate encounters with him or you're going to have to figure out a way to sort of satisfy yourself in between seeing him.

32:11 Drew And what are your options otherwise?

32:14 Caller I don't know.

32:15 Adam Well, what is your question for us? Do you have a plan?

32:18 Drew What are you looking for?

32:19 Adam You want to break up? You want to get a new boyfriend who lives in town?

32:22 Caller No, I'm happy with him. I'm just wondering why it's not enough for me.

32:28 Drew Because this isn't close to enough for most people.

32:32 Caller I don't know.

32:34 Adam Hey, Melissa. Did you just get, did your spaceship land in a mire somewhere and you just crawl from it or something? You're on earth, right? You're 16.

32:45 Caller Yeah.

32:46 Adam You like something. Let's forget we're talking. Let's say it's not sex.

32:51 Drew Ice cream.

32:51 Adam Ice cream or your favorite TV show or something you just enjoy a lot. And you're only doing it once a month. That's not very often. You'd like to do it more, right?

33:01 Caller Well, four times in one day isn't even enough.

33:04 Drew That's if you're doing it once a month or is that even if you're doing it every day?

33:08 Caller It's once a month.

33:10 Adam OK. So, look, do you think that you're like sexual deviant or pervert or something?

33:19 Caller Say that again.

33:20 Adam All right.

33:21 Caller I have the radio and my other...

33:22 Adam OK. Don't have kids.

33:23 Drew Yeah. There you go.

33:24 Adam Please, no kids.

33:25 Drew If four times in one day is what she's worried about when she's only doing it once a month, maybe if she were on a more regular schedule, she wouldn't be pushing it to four times a day. You understand what I'm saying? And if, on the other hand, if four times a day would be not enough, even if you're having sex every day, well, that's a sexual compulsive and that's a different issue. But she didn't talk about the other things that go along with sexual compulsively, like excessive masturbation, like engaging in kinds of high-risk behaviors, it's not there. It's just the lack of proximity, I think.

33:55 Adam Yeah. Okay. I'm done caring. I know. I know. I'm with Mike. Mike doesn't care. I don't care anymore either. I got to start mixing. I mix like a salad.

34:08 Drew Mean pasta.

34:08 Adam I mix a good pasta and a good salad. Maybe I could get up there with some kind of salad bar type thing while you were mixing and I could do some stirring and mixing or something like that.

34:17 Mix Master Mike We could do some blendage.

34:19 Adam Here's what I'm saying. It's time that we cross-pollinate music and food.

34:24 Drew In the kitchen, yeah.

34:25 Adam It's not been done before.

34:26 Drew Well, the Food Channel, they've got to have something new going on. Mix Master.

34:31 Adam The Mixing Chef. You just sit there and scratch and mix and I'll blend. I'll get like a food processor out. David.

34:41 Drew There you go. Mix Master Emeril.

34:43 Adam You can sample my Cuisinart. David, you're 32.

34:47 Caller Hey, Adam and Drew. I love the show.

34:48 Adam Good times. What's up?

34:49 Caller I got a question for you. My girlfriend, I've been seeing her for about six months now and for the past month, she's developed a problem where when she has an orgasm, she pees.

35:00 Drew It only started up in the last month.

35:01 Caller Yes.

35:01 Drew Has she ever had it before?

35:03 Caller No, she's never had it before.

35:04 Adam And where are you when she pees?

35:06 Caller Sometimes down there so it gets a little hairy.

35:09 Adam Half times. You're going down on her?

35:12 Caller So short of a scuba mask, it's like a different solution.

35:15 Adam Where does it come out? In a stream like a little baby?

35:19 Caller Definitely comes out.

35:20 Drew Like a little baby?

35:21 Adam You know, little babies lie there and they pee and it goes straight up in the air.

35:24 Drew Oh, that way. I see. Like a little baby.

35:26 Adam I see.

35:27 Drew Or what Adam's asking is this maybe a female ejaculate, not urine?

35:31 Caller It's definitely urine.

35:33 Adam Yeah. He knows it's urine. And do you get squirted? Is it like wiper spray, right? Like pow, like right in the eye?

35:40 Caller If she pees beforehand, it's usually just a little bit. If she doesn't, it's heads up. Watch out.

35:45 Adam Yeah. I mean, if she does it during the orgasm, it'll come flying out of there.

35:48 Drew If she hasn't peed before sex, pow.

35:51 Adam Oh, right. Oh, I see. Is there certain gratification you get from that, certain satisfaction?

35:58 Caller Uh, no. It's something we'd both like to have stop, actually.

36:01 Adam Yeah. See, I told you, Drew, guys aren't into this. They're into the novelty side maybe once or twice, but this is going to get old.

36:08 Drew I just think guys like producing something, like evidence of their success.

36:13 Adam They like that the first couple of times, but I'd say the novelty wears off pretty fast when you get it peed on.

36:19 Drew Yeah, then you deal with it, you manage it, you know what I'm saying? You figure out a way not to get peed on, you figure out how to do that.

36:25 Caller I don't know how that works. I don't want to talk before she comes because then it defeats the purpose.

36:29 Adam Yeah, I mean, look, how do you pull out before the orgasm and the thing comes with orgasm? You can't do that.

36:36 Drew I don't think you can do anything during intercourse, but he can certainly protect himself during oral sex.

36:42 Adam How?

36:43 Drew Well, they call it a dental dam.

36:44 Adam Oh, please. No one's going to... You take a... You take Saran Wrap, you wrap the vagina up like it's some extra turkey you're putting in the freezer, and then you lick on it through the Saran Wrap. Drew calls that good, intimate sex.

36:59 Drew If you knew...

36:59 Adam That's ridiculous.

37:01 Drew They didn't call it a dam for nothing. If you know you're about to be exposed to a flood, you're not going to feel so bad about just pulling that up there at the end and using it like a shield.

37:08 Adam Damn, bitch!

37:10 Drew Right?

37:10 Adam No, that's a horrible...

37:13 Drew Why?

37:13 Adam Why don't you just get one of those shields the bomb squad uses to approach suspicious packages or get that robot with the eye on it or something. You take... Mike, have you ever been peed on by a girl?

37:25 Mix Master Mike No.

37:26 Adam No, you never had that? No, not... Me neither.

37:29 Drew I think the dental dad was the perfect solution. I think you... you worry more about the sheets.

37:33 Adam You gotta protect your eyes too. You put the whole thing up.

37:36 Drew You're putting this... you're putting this across the...

37:37 Adam I... no.

37:39 Drew Yes.

37:39 Adam David...

37:40 Drew I insist.

37:41 Adam You don't like that.

37:41 Mix Master Mike I think his girl been watching them European... European pornos where they take dumps on each other and stuff like that.

37:48 Drew What's that, David?

37:48 Caller It really sounds like one of those German porn movies.

37:50 Adam Yeah.

37:51 Mix Master Mike Yeah, that's what I was saying. Maybe she got a collection of that.

37:53 Drew I think during intercourse nothing can do but prepare the bed, right?

37:59 Adam Listen, does it go in your mouth or does it go in your eyes?

38:02 Caller Depends on how quick I move.

38:03 Adam Well, what if you didn't move? Where would it hit you?

38:06 Caller Square in the face.

38:07 Adam Just in the nose and the...

38:09 Drew What the hell is wrong with just a little piece of plastic over that? It would ricochet right off.

38:14 Adam I don't approve. I just don't approve.

38:16 Drew You just don't like the idea of you licking on top of it. How about if you bring it up and...

38:20 Adam She's not going to have an orgasm being licked with a piece of Saran wrap.

38:24 Drew Just at the end.

38:25 Adam Yeah, but you know, here's the problem with just at the end. She gets very close to the orgasm and then you go, stop, hold on. Let me get the plastic out. Let me put a tarp over your vagina like I'm painting your legs or something. No. David, how about some like swimming goggles?

38:44 Drew Kegel exercises?

38:45 Adam Yeah, she needs to do some work. This dental damn thing is not going to work. If she does these Kegel exercises and evacuates her system before you have sex, she'll get some control.

38:56 Drew How old is she?

38:57 Caller She's 40.

38:58 Drew Has she had babies?

38:59 Caller No.

39:00 Adam Does she have the orgasm during intercourse, you say?

39:03 Caller Yes.

39:03 Adam Okay. Well, just stick with that orgasm. That's enough.

39:06 Drew Has she had trouble? Does she lose her urine easily? Does she laugh or sneeze and peel a bit?

39:11 Caller About 10 years ago, she did have surgery to have her bladder enlarged. As she said, all her life she has the sensation that after she pees, she still has to go.

39:19 Drew All right. So she's got urinary problems. There are medicines that might help her evacuate more fully. There's something called Detral or Detrapan that might help her retain her urine.

39:29 Adam How about you get her one of those adult diapers and just put a hole in it for the intercourse? You know what I'm saying?

39:36 Drew That would probably work.

39:37 Adam It would. That's an angle. It depends for the really active senior. All right. We're going to take ourselves a break. Mix Master Mike is here. He's got a CD coming out on the 11th. That's this Tuesday. Monday going to be at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset. And we'll hear something else off the Spin Psycho CD in the next hour when we come back. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. There's some mixing, right?

40:21 Mix Master Mike The mixing and scratching.

40:24 Adam Crystal Leppard. That's Mix Master Mike over there. I'm Adam, that's Drew. Spin Cycle is the name of the CD. Out Tuesday, the 11th. Coming up this Tuesday, Monday night, eight o'clock at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset. Mike will be signing the new CD. We'll hear something off that after a couple of calls, and it's back to the phones we go. Steve?

40:48 Caller Yeah?

40:49 Adam 22?

40:50 Caller Yep.

40:51 Adam What's up?

40:52 What's going on? I have a problem with ejaculating with my girlfriend. I don't laugh longer than like three minutes. Pretty funny, huh?

41:06 Adam Yeah. And...

41:08 It's not very funny to me.

41:09 Adam How long have you been with her?

41:11 I've been with her for a year and a half.

41:13 Adam And it's been this way the whole year and a half?

41:15 Yes, it has.

41:16 Adam Wow, she's a tolerant woman.

41:18 Drew How long does it take you again?

41:20 Huh?

41:20 Adam Three minutes.

41:21 Drew Three minutes?

41:22 Three minutes.

41:22 Mix Master Mike You're a three-minute brother?

41:24 Drew And would she... Is she satisfied with things?

41:27 Actually, she is. She's really happy with me and stuff, but I just want to know how I can laugh longer with her.

41:33 Drew Is she asking you to laugh longer? Yeah. She is.

41:37 All the time. The only time I ever laugh long with her is when I'm drinking. All right.

41:41 Adam Well, there's your answer. Do you give her oral sex?

41:47 Yes, I do.

41:48 Adam Well, see, you start the clock with the oral sex, so if you do that for 15 minutes and then you last three minutes, you're up to 18 minutes. That's the way I look. You punch in when you go down. That's when you go in the shop, you punch in.

42:02 Drew And you get double time down there, don't you?

42:03 Adam I got golden time.

42:04 Drew Golden time, yeah.

42:06 Caller Quick call.

42:07 Drew That was that call we had a few minutes ago.

42:09 Adam Yeah, he got golden time right in the mouth. So at least that's good. Now, do you finish her off with the oral sex and give her an orgasm?

42:18 Caller Yeah, I do.

42:18 Drew But she's looking for something a little different.

42:20 Yeah, she does.

42:21 Adam Okay.

42:22 Drew You sure of that?

42:23 Yeah.

42:23 Adam Well, Drew, what's...

42:25 Drew Because he said, well, she's so happy and everything's great. And then he went, well, she asks all the time.

42:28 Adam She meant she's happy with him. She likes him in a relationship, but she'd like a little more more boinking in the bedroom. Um, Drew.

42:38 Drew Yeah.

42:38 Adam How about... Is there a way to numb the penis up a little bit?

42:42 Drew There we... I talked about there was a study came out of England that showed you could do that. But I think more your more routine kinds of recommendations are better.

42:50 Adam Like masturbating beforehand?

42:52 Drew Yeah.

42:53 Adam Well, how would that work for you, Steve?

42:56 Masturbating?

42:57 Adam Yeah, let's say an hour before.

42:59 Mix Master Mike Before sex.

43:00 Adam Yeah. Yeah.

43:01 Actually, what every other guy says is the I don't masturbate, which I think is full bull.

43:08 Adam With the S word, what does he say?

43:11 Drew He's saying he doesn't masturbate at all.

43:14 Adam I don't know.

43:14 Drew Adam, you should be outraged.

43:17 Adam I don't know that was his answer.

43:18 Drew I think that's where he was going.

43:20 Adam Okay, he used the S word.

43:22 Mix Master Mike No, he says he didn't believe in masturbating.

43:24 Drew Yeah.

43:24 Mix Master Mike That's what he said.

43:26 Adam Which, okay.

43:27 Drew You should be outraged.

43:28 Adam All right, hold on. Steve?

43:29 Yeah.

43:30 Adam Are you saying you don't believe in masturbation?

43:32 Well, it's not like I don't believe in it. I just, I don't do it.

43:37 You are an asshole.

43:39 Adam You don't do it?

43:40 No, I don't.

43:41 Adam And maybe you should because maybe that would help.

43:43 Drew Well, that's what you're gonna need to do.

43:45 Adam You need to take a little steam out of your balls. You understand? You got too much pressure built up.

43:51 Yeah.

43:52 Adam Why don't you do that?

43:53 Well, I don't know. I just feel wrong doing it.

43:55 Adam Are you a religious person?

43:57 No, actually I'm not. I just, it doesn't feel right to me at all.

44:03 Drew What, what, to help us understand that?

44:05 Adam What's wrong with that? And there's no religion in your family, huh?

44:09 Drew What's wrong? What is the difficulty?

44:10 Adam It feels dirty?

44:11 Yeah, pretty much.

44:13 Adam Well, that's why you do it in the shower.

44:15 What do I do in the shower?

44:16 Adam You whack off in the shower standing up. No mess.

44:19 All right, well, I'm game.

44:22 Drew Adam feels that.

44:22 Adam I'm 22 years old. We're having this conversation about masturbation.

44:26 Drew Adam feels that self-disgust, too, and self-loathing. But he gets over it.

44:29 Adam I get over it almost immediately.

44:31 Yeah, well, hey, I just feel weird about it.

44:34 Drew Seriously. You're doing it for your girlfriend. It is just a mechanism whereby you're going to achieve what you're looking for with her. It's nothing else. It's a treatment.

44:45 Adam Okay, let's look at it this way, as if I said, look, if you did 25 push-ups before sex, you would last another 10 minutes, you would gladly do it.

44:55 Drew It's the same thing.

44:56 Adam Look at this as a physical exercise for you to do before sex. Yeah.

45:00 Drew It's a workout.

45:01 Adam So try it. And Steve, I wonder seriously about his mental stability at age 22, as a male thinks masturbation is dirty and there's no religion involved.

45:12 Drew But Adam, just because somebody doesn't agree with your view of the world doesn't mean they're sick. I understand it violates all your sensibilities.

45:19 Adam Yes, it does.

45:19 Drew It shakes you to your core.

45:21 Adam Drew, you as a doctor and as a passionate, passionate man and Mike is a world class scratcher.

45:27 Drew I totally am disturbed by this. Don't get me wrong.

45:29 Adam Well, back me up on this. That is bizarre for a 22 year old guy to think it's dirty. Would you not agree?

45:36 Drew I would agree it's unusual.

45:37 Adam And would you agree that there's probably other issues this guy has that it's not just contained to the underpants?

45:43 Drew Yeah, you would expect so, but you would expect so. You would expect so.

45:48 Adam This is not the kind of guy you'd want to hang out with. Not me.

45:50 Drew You wouldn't.

45:51 Adam Fundamental differences.

45:52 Drew I'm sure he does not like model airplanes.

45:53 Adam Like a Jew and a Muslim, we would get along, me and him. EK.?

45:59 What's up?

46:00 Adam Hey, you're 19. What's going on?

46:03 First of all, I want to say Dr. Drew, you're a genius.

46:05 Drew Dude.

46:06 Caller Word. And Adam, you're a god.

46:08 Adam Thank you.

46:09 Caller Hey, Nick Master Mike.

46:10 Mix Master Mike Yo.

46:11 Caller Hey, I read on Rob Zombie's website that you're going to be working with him on his new CD.

46:15 Mix Master Mike Yeah, I just finished doing all the scratches for his new album. Check it out when it comes out.

46:19 Caller What song are you on?

46:20 Mix Master Mike All of them.

46:21 Caller All of them?

46:23 Mix Master Mike All of them except like three of them.

46:26 Caller Oh, wow. That's amazing. Yeah. And one more thing. How come Invisible Scratch Freakles broke up?

46:33 Mix Master Mike Because we had like other solo projects. So we just wanted to lay low and finish our solo projects and hopefully come back to a little reunion later on down the road.

46:44 Caller That's cool. I'm here from Frisco till I'm real proud of you guys.

46:47 Mix Master Mike Oh, dope.

46:48 Caller All right.

46:49 Adam Thanks, EK. Take care. Hey, when's the Rob Zombie CD coming out?

46:55 Mix Master Mike I think it's coming out next month.

46:56 Adam Oh, really? Yeah. Well, good. Well, we'll try to get them on the show and we'll play it. And we'll go, hey, that's Mixed Master Mike.

47:02 Drew Speaking of San Francisco, Mike was saying he was scratching at Pack Bell Park yesterday. Have you ever seen that park?

47:06 Mix Master Mike Well, not yesterday. It was like the day before.

47:08 Drew The day before yesterday.

47:09 Adam Well, it was why we've been talking about it. It was 48 hours ago.

47:12 Drew But have you seen that park?

47:14 Adam The Giant Stadium over there.

47:16 Drew So, probably the most beautiful stadium in the country.

47:18 Adam I've not been in there.

47:19 Mix Master Mike Sure. They had me on the big screen for like a whole hour pregame warm up and stuff. So I was like, I was cutting it up.

47:24 Adam So where were you set up? I mean, physically, we're down on the field.

47:29 Mix Master Mike Right there behind, right there behind the catcher. And right behind the backstop home plate.

47:34 Adam Right behind the backstop. So you had the screen between you and the any pass ball that might have ruined your equipment or your precious brain.

47:41 Mix Master Mike Yeah.

47:42 Adam And the whole hour before the game. I mean, the game started at what time?

47:46 Mix Master Mike Batting practice. The game started at 730. And I took it. I took it from like 630 to 730.

47:54 Adam Oh, man.

47:55 Mix Master Mike Yeah, it was dope.

47:56 Adam I'll tell you, that is, to me, San Francisco is the most beautiful city in the United States. And the idea of those crystal blue skies and the clouds and the wind kicking in off the bay.

48:08 Drew You're on the bay there with that state.

48:09 Adam And the home runs going into the water.

48:11 Mix Master Mike Into McCovey Cove. Yeah, it's amazing.

48:14 Caller It's amazing.

48:14 Adam That just sounds gorgeous.

48:15 Mix Master Mike Yeah, it was nice.

48:16 Drew They almost ruined it putting the XFL in there.

48:18 Caller Oh, they did.

48:19 Mix Master Mike They did.

48:20 Adam Yeah, they're gone now. All right, so you got to sit out there. And did you get to hang out and then watch a game?

48:26 Mix Master Mike Well, before I went on, I was, like, chilling in the training room with all the guys, like Barry Bonds, all of them.

48:35 Adam I heard Barry Bonds has his own lazy boy big screen in there.

48:39 Mix Master Mike You know, he has his whole own wall where he has a massage chair and a little big screen TV where he chills and watches ESPN. And just, you know, he's just like the kingpin running the show over there.

48:52 Adam And imagine it's a good way to get your teammates pissed off at you.

48:56 Caller Yeah, yeah.

48:57 Mix Master Mike All the other all the other teammates got these little lockers.

49:00 Caller Right.

49:01 Mix Master Mike You look to the other corner, it's like Barry Bonds' area.

49:04 Adam Well, it's kind of like roped off with a black guy who doesn't let you in there.

49:10 Mix Master Mike Well, he has a couple of dudes feeding him chicken.

49:12 Drew And I've had to learn to live with that with Adam, you know, guys. I mean, that's right. You're going to swallow that and you take it.

49:18 Adam Yeah, yeah.

49:19 Drew You know, right, right.

49:21 Adam My dressing room had four raisins in it and some tap water. How dare you, Drew? Your dressing room had a... didn't you have a shower in yours?

49:30 Drew Yeah.

49:30 Adam Oh, you son of a bitch. All right. One more. No, no shower. How dare you, John?

49:37 Drew So you have the big mirror.

49:39 Adam John, I like to look at myself and talk to myself before I go on TV.

49:43 Drew Hose down.

49:43 Adam That's right. John, you're 14. What's up?

49:46 Caller Yeah. I'm on a drug called Geratropin. It's an injection for like a growth hormone.

49:52 Drew Growth hormone, yeah.

49:53 Caller Okay.

49:54 Adam What size are you?

49:55 Caller I'm a 4'6.

49:56 Drew What happened?

49:57 Caller Me and my penis size?

49:58 Drew No, no, no. That's a good... thinking like a good 14-year-old. But why do you need the growth hormone? What's going on with you medically?

50:06 Caller I don't know. My mom is like... I'd say about 5'5, or something. And it's just kind of genetic. And so they know that I'd be this size for the rest of my life if I didn't have it.

50:19 Adam I see.

50:19 Caller Yeah.

50:21 Adam 5'5, not too small for a woman. Maybe she's smaller. And so you're 4'6?

50:29 Caller Yeah.

50:29 Adam And how much do you weigh?

50:31 Caller About 80 pounds.

50:32 Adam 80 pounds.

50:33 Drew You've not had puberty yet, right?

50:34 Caller Right.

50:35 Caller How old are you?

50:36 Caller 14.

50:37 Mix Master Mike 14.

50:38 Adam Okay.

50:38 Drew What's the question?

50:39 Caller I was wondering, the doctor said something about how this was going to affect my puberty, but I didn't know how exactly is it like, is it going to be soon or is it?

50:50 Adam How the growth hormone is going to affect your puberty or how being small stature? Yeah. She, hold on, you're going to a chick doctor? Oh, man.

50:59 Drew She said what? She said what now?

51:01 Caller She said, take my balls away from my heart.

51:03 Adam Yeah, that's good. That's good.

51:05 Drew She said what now?

51:06 Caller She said that it was going to affect my puberty somehow, but I didn't, I don't know if it's going to slow it down or...

51:13 Drew You know what? I can't answer that. I don't know off top of my head. I would think, I can't understand how it would have much of an effect on puberty.

51:20 Adam You take this injection every day?

51:22 Caller Yeah, six days a week.

51:23 Adam And you inject it directly in your penis?

51:26 Caller No.

51:27 Adam No, well that's what you should do. And this is going to... what do they project? Do they think you'll get up to five, six or something like that?

51:37 Caller Actually about five, ten to six foot.

51:40 Adam Oh, really? Yeah, they've made some inroads in this department. And do you eat a lot? Do you try to eat more and do that kind of thing?

51:49 Caller Yeah, I guess. Not really.

51:52 Adam Let me tell you something about being little. I've given this a lot of consideration. First off, little guys I know always got a ton of tail. They always got a ton of poondang. And I think it's because chicks figured, look, if push comes to shove, I'll kick their ass. You know, they weren't threatening. Drew, who gets laid more, big dudes or little dudes? Answer the question, truthfully.

52:15 Drew Big dudes are sort of goofy and awkward.

52:17 Adam That's right.

52:17 Mix Master Mike I think little dudes with money get laid more.

52:19 Adam Little dudes with money, right. Right, but over big dudes with money or just big dudes who are poor?

52:25 Mix Master Mike Over big dudes that are poor.

52:26 Adam Oh, okay.

52:28 Drew If you were a woman, would you want some big gross?

52:31 Adam No. Look, I'm telling you, my buddy, the Wheeze, he's all of 125 pounds, a guy got tons of tail, always.

52:39 Drew He's a wave model.

52:40 Adam If all these matinee guys, these little Davy Jones type guys and all these little Weasley guys in the past, always got a lot of tail.

52:48 Drew Yeah.

52:49 Adam So you can look forward to that, John. You really can.

52:51 Mix Master Mike Look at Tattoo.

52:52 Adam Yeah. He got tons of ass. Mini me. Mini me. Mini me.

52:58 Caller They got busy.

52:59 Adam That's right. Did hop up to get himself wedged in a vagina, but he did it. So John, don't worry about the women. Then you'll never have to fly first class because Coach is first class for you. It's a good thing. You understand? Yeah. Miata is like a corvette for you.

53:16 Mix Master Mike Yeah. You'll be in good shape.

53:18 Drew I would think, I can't see how the pure would be affected by the growth hormone necessarily. If anything, I would think it would accelerate them.

53:26 Adam All right. Are your friends cool? Do people make fun of you?

53:29 Caller Yeah. Hell yeah.

53:30 Adam What do they do? What do they call you?

53:32 Caller Uh, Minimeet.

53:35 Adam Oh yeah. That's got to suck.

53:36 Caller Warren Trotter. There you go.

53:37 Right.

53:39 Caller Uh, I don't know.

53:41 Adam Yeah. Bad timing with that Austin Powers thing right when you came out.

53:46 Drew There was a boss before that.

53:47 Adam Well, okay. All right. At least you're not a munchkin. Yeah. All right, John. Take care of yourself. Study hard. And remember, little rich guys get a lot of ass according to Mike. Yeah. What's it? What do you want to say?

53:59 Caller I just want to say thanks, guys, because, yeah, it's taken me a long time to get call in or whatever, but thanks for your help.

54:04 Adam Okay.

54:05 Caller With everybody.

54:06 Adam Our pleasure. Take care of yourself. All right. Let's hear something from Mix Master Mike. This off the spin cycle CD, which is coming out on the 11th. That's coming up this Tuesday.

54:18 Mix Master Mike This one's called Board Burner.

54:20 Adam Yes.

54:21 Mix Master Mike Check it out.

57:50 Adam A little ditty called Board Burner from Mix Master Mike. Spin Cycle's the name of the CD, and that is out on the 11th, and on the 10th, he will be signing at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset, starting at eight o'clock. So get down there, get down there early, get Spin Cycle, and then you'll sign it for him, right?

58:10 Mix Master Mike Definitely. Come through, yep, I'll sign it.

58:13 Adam We'll squeeze in one more call here. Robbie?

58:17 Yeah.

58:18 Adam You're 26?

58:19 Caller Yeah, I've been diagnosed with antisocial personality, borderline personality disorder, manic depressant, and one said I may be bipolar.

58:33 Adam You want to go camping this weekend?

58:35 Caller What's that?

58:36 Adam No, just checking.

58:37 Drew Just checking how it makes you feel. You get that?

58:38 Mix Master Mike You see that?

58:39 Adam All right. And so-

58:41 Drew Did you get that right away?

58:42 Adam Oh, shit.

58:42 Drew No, no, it's just interesting. Poor Robbie, I mean, it's- Yeah, poor Robbie. It gives people a feeling right away.

58:49 Adam Yeah. So what do you want to do about it there, Robbie?

58:53 Caller Well, the bad part about it is I've been married since May, and we've been together for five years, but I can't stay with her and be happy. I mean, she's a good person. It's just I can't stay in a relationship. I mean, it's been like this my whole life.

59:07 Drew Yeah, that is sort of a hallmark of character problems, personality disorders, that really when you're in a relationship, that's where the craziness really comes out. And if you're truly a borderline, which is kind of unusual in male patients, but there is such a thing. The point being is you have a real primitive kind of emotional system you're operating with and it becomes extremely chaotic and intense and sometimes destructive to be in a relationship.

59:33 Adam So you mean it's sort of overwhelming for you to be in a relationship?

59:37 Caller Yeah, I get suicidal being so unhappy being in a relationship, but yet when I'm not with...

59:44 Drew You freak out as soon as she leaves though too, right?

59:47 Caller Exactly.

59:48 Drew That's the old borderline stuff.

59:50 Adam I think I got that too.

59:51 Drew No, but he really has got it.

59:52 Adam Okay.

59:53 Drew That's not the antisocial.

59:55 Adam Yeah. All right. So do you have any kids with her?

59:57 Caller Yeah, I've got one now and one on the way.

1:00:02 Adam That's smart planning there, Robbie.

1:00:04 Caller There was no planning going on there.

1:00:05 Adam Well, not planning is the same as having a bad plan. Write that down, Drew.

1:00:10 Drew No, I'm planning on doing that. Got it.

1:00:11 Adam Okay. So, Robbie, now that you got the kids, you're going to have to basically take a stand and fight this thing and work through it. I mean, you're seeing somebody, right?

1:00:23 Caller I'm making some appointments to go see somebody. I don't know if it should be a therapist, a psychiatrist.

1:00:30 Drew Well, start with psychiatry and they can help sort of figure out what's going on diagnostically. And if you are bipolar, there should be some medication to help out. But this business of not being able to be in a relationship and not being able to be without one is really the domain of therapy. The need to develop a sense of yourself, have a self and have an emotional world that you can kind of regulate on your own.

1:00:50 Adam Hey, Robbie.

1:00:51 Caller Yeah.

1:00:52 Adam How's your wife? I mean, does she understand what you have? And if you told her, you know, hey, there's certain days when you just need to check out, I don't mean move out, but I just mean be left alone.

1:01:04 Caller Yeah, she understands that she's very helpful. I mean, she's the one that's trying to get me the help that I need and everything. We, I mean, we're separated. I live at my house. She lives at hers and, and when she's still wanting to stay married in case we can work this out.

1:01:20 Drew Well, you're planning to get some help. Follow through, go do it.

1:01:24 Adam You got your own pad?

1:01:26 Caller Yeah.

1:01:27 Adam Yeah. You're not moved back in with your folks?

1:01:30 Caller No.

1:01:30 Adam You got your own pad? She's got her own pad.

1:01:32 Drew Unless you're doing that by Robin Banks, your anti-social elements can't be that bad.

1:01:37 Caller Well, I'm a truck driver, so I'm by myself all the time, so that's the only job that I can have and be happy with it.

1:01:45 Caller Nice.

1:01:46 Adam Yeah. Hey, you got a lot of that stuff that plugs into the cigarette liner?

1:01:52 Caller No, I sure don't.

1:01:53 Adam Yeah. I should get some of that. I'm always fascinated by that. There's one called the sandwich maker. I can't figure out how that works, but you plug it into your cigarette liner, and apparently you get sandwiches.

1:02:01 Drew Quok m'sure, huh?

1:02:02 Adam Yeah. All right, so hey, Robbie? Yeah. I do, look, you got a situation. We were talking to someone earlier tonight about this. It's, you're gonna have to kind of fight for this.

1:02:13 Caller Yeah, I've been trying to fight for quite a long time, and it's just, I don't know if I should be on to medication.

1:02:19 Drew Yeah, you heard what I said.

1:02:20 Adam Probably should.

1:02:21 Drew See the psychiatrist first. You probably need some medication. Then you need therapy.

1:02:25 Caller Okay.

1:02:25 Adam Okay.

1:02:26 Caller Thanks a lot, guys.

1:02:27 Adam Get into that stuff, and you know, so you don't do that white line fever thing, where you take the truck, and you drive it through the big sign, and you go nuts like Jan Michael Vinson did. That was an excellent movie. They don't make enough movies about truckers anymore. You guys notice that?

1:02:43 Mix Master Mike No, they don't.

1:02:43 Drew Yeah.

1:02:43 Adam There should be a lot of those convoy movies, a lot of guys driving trucks. Sitcoms about guys with trucks and monkeys and stuff.

1:02:50 Mix Master Mike Because they were smoky and abandoned.

1:02:52 Drew They were living their own life their own way, and they weren't having them kissing the band's ass. Okay, Adam?

1:02:58 Adam People were singing about driving a truck. There was no better time to drive a truck than like 1976, 77. Now you drive a truck, no one cares. Back then, it was pretty romantic business.

1:03:08 Mix Master Mike It was pretty in with the folded hat and stuff like that in the back pocket.

1:03:11 Adam Yeah. That's right. And there was always some share for the bad mustache and those mirrored sunglasses. It was trying to give you a hard time, and all you were trying to do was see America and deliver some goods, man.

1:03:24 Mix Master Mike Yeah.

1:03:24 Adam It was coming down on you.

1:03:25 Mix Master Mike But Jackie Gleason was coming down.

1:03:30 Adam I'm going to barbecue your ass, boy.

1:03:33 Drew I want to talk to Dan.

1:03:35 Adam I love that Smoking the Bandit movie.

1:03:37 Drew Just a second. Just a second.

1:03:38 Adam Drew, you got to see that Smoking the Bandit.

1:03:40 Drew It's Dom Delwez and Burt Reynolds.

1:03:42 Adam No, that's Cannonball.

1:03:44 Drew Hey, Dan, 47. Dan, what's up?

1:03:47 Yeah. I have a DEMO, and I don't know what the cure is. I've been taking antihistamines and...

1:03:53 Drew A DEMO of what?...

1:03:54 of my legs and my arms are really weird about it, because I think it's the same as elicentiasis. I've seen advanced cases in your arms and legs get really... What are you......blood flow, and I have to cut them off.

1:04:06 Adam This guy sounds like the killer from Silence of the Lambs. Is that you? No?

1:04:11 Drew Let's take a break.

1:04:12 Adam All right, Dan. Hey, Drew.

1:04:13 Drew Here's what it says up here.

1:04:14 Adam Yeah, good instincts to talk to Dan before we go to a break. So we can all get good and freaked out before we go to break? You know, I can't pee now. I won't be able to pee. I can't perform.

1:04:26 Drew You will in front of me.

1:04:27 Adam Don't worry. Mix Master Mike Sear will take a little break. We'll get back with Dima Dayan after this. Who was that? Was that Rob Schneier? Who was that? Oh, we didn't have our headphones on. Mixer Master Mike is our guest tonight. Spin Cycle is the name of the CD, out coming up this Tuesday at Virgin Megastore on Sunset on Monday night, eight o'clock. Gonna sign those CDs for ya. And I'm a little bit worried about getting back to David.

1:05:03 Drew We'll get it over with.

1:05:04 Adam Let's just get it over with. Dan 47.

1:05:07 Drew So, Dan, you're having edema, right?

1:05:09 Adam Yes.

1:05:09 Drew Alright, there are...

1:05:10 Adam What's edema, Drew?

1:05:11 Drew You start getting fluid retention in your system and you start swelling up. You don't have to worry about having amputations unless your skin starts breaking down, but it does mean there's something very serious medically going on with you. It's either medication, if you're on medication, kidney disease, liver disease, or heart failure. And it does need to be treated, it needs to be treated now, so you need to head off to an emergency room and get this looked into to see what's going on.

1:05:35 All right, all right, all right, and that's true about that hooker.

1:05:39 Drew What hooker?

1:05:40 She's the one that can make your dick three feet long.

1:05:44 Adam What hooker is this? I've not heard of her.

1:05:46 I live right next door to her.

1:05:48 Drew How would she do that?

1:05:50 I don't know. She just did it. She did it to me.

1:05:53 Adam She made your penis three feet long?

1:05:55 Yeah.

1:05:55 Adam Maybe she shrunk the rest of your body. Your penis seemed three feet long.

1:06:00 No, I'm not kidding. She can really do it.

1:06:01 Drew Maybe it's the edema, because the edema will start settling in your testes and penis eventually. It will. I've seen people's testes.

1:06:09 Is there any other way? How do I get it treated? What do they use to treat edema?

1:06:12 Drew Lasix.

1:06:14 What?

1:06:14 Drew You get IV Lasix to start with. But it depends what the cause of the edema is. You got to go in and check it out.

1:06:19 Oh, God. I hope it's not biological. I hope it's just chemical or something.

1:06:23 Adam Hey, Dan.

1:06:24 Yeah.

1:06:24 Adam Do you have a job?

1:06:26 No.

1:06:26 Adam Yeah. Shocking. What's up? You're unable to work?

1:06:33 Well, I have problems, mental problems. When I was a kid, they...

1:06:37 Adam Well, hold on. Are you taking care of those? Are you taking medication and all that stuff?

1:06:40 Yeah. Okay.

1:06:41 Adam You're not dangerous to anybody or yourself?

1:06:44 No.

1:06:44 Adam Just paying an ass to your family?

1:06:46 No.

1:06:47 Adam Okay. Good. Take care of yourself and take care of your edema.

1:06:50 All right.

1:06:50 Adam And stop fantasizing about this crazy witchy hooker. There's a song.

1:06:56 Mix Master Mike How do we sound like Buffalo Bill?

1:06:58 Adam Witchy hooker. That's what I was saying.

1:07:00 Mix Master Mike You sound like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.

1:07:03 Adam Yeah.

1:07:03 Mix Master Mike He's scary there.

1:07:05 Adam He didn't. He sounded like he was sucking on an ether rank. Tater.

1:07:09 Caller Tater.

1:07:11 Adam No. That's sling blade, you idiot.

1:07:14 Caller These French fried taters.

1:07:17 Caller He didn't need a sling blade.

1:07:19 Adam He was trying to rape mama. I got a sling blade and I went upside to see him. I like to play football with boys. You going to finish them taters? Rose?

1:07:35 Hi.

1:07:36 Adam You're 41? What's up?

1:07:39 Caller First of all, I'd like to say that a friend of mine wrote me and said that he listens to your station every night to love them. And he said, why don't you listen to it with me? He's incarcerated. And I've been listening for about a week now and you guys are great.

1:07:54 Adam Well, thank you.

1:07:55 Caller Anyway, this is a long, complicated story, but I originally came here from Las Vegas and my husband was incarcerated. I came here with two kids and to a mutual friend of ours, where I met this other guy whose girlfriend was incarcerated.

1:08:13 Adam Rose, just let me stop for a second. When 80% of the people you know are doing time, isn't that, don't you have to sort of stop and examine your life at a certain point?

1:08:24 Drew Just keep going west.

1:08:26 Caller I have. Believe me, we're making some changes. But anyway, now he's incarcerated. In the meantime.

1:08:35 Drew What's everyone getting incarcerated for? Drugs?

1:08:38 Caller No, he's just for introducing to people and.

1:08:43 Adam Right, that happens. I remember I set my sister up with my now brother-in-law, her husband.

1:08:49 Drew You sent your Roe up for 10 years.

1:08:50 Adam Yeah, I went down for that. Did some pretty good time. It was worth it. I got my nephews out of it, but I did do time for that.

1:08:56 Drew Rose, what the hell are you talking about?

1:08:57 Adam Oh, who cares? Just keep BSing and go ahead.

1:09:01 Caller Okay, you didn't follow me? Okay, when I came here from Las Vegas, my husband was already incarcerated.

1:09:06 Adam Right, everyone's incarcerated.

1:09:08 Drew For nothing, for introducing each other.

1:09:10 Caller What's the problem? What we did was me and my friend did, that's incarcerated now, we became very close.

1:09:19 Adam This is a male?

1:09:21 Caller I'm sorry?

1:09:21 Adam That's a man that's incarcerated?

1:09:24 Drew This was a male friend whose wife was incarcerated. Girlfriend, and now he's incarcerated too.

1:09:30 Caller Now he's incarcerated.

1:09:31 You got very close.

1:09:33 Caller Before he got incarcerated, yes, I became very close. Actually, he had one of the best times of my life. He was just a lot of fun to be with.

1:09:41 Sure.

1:09:41 Caller And he lifted a lot of my burdens. I was, when I got here, I was a mess.

1:09:46 Adam Right.

1:09:47 Caller But our time together, I was very happy.

1:09:50 Adam Okay, I understand. It really sounds like a storybook romance, I mean, before he got hauled off to jail.

1:09:55 Caller Well, yes. Now our time together is pretty much up. I mean, it's over.

1:09:59 Drew What can we do for your rose?

1:10:01 Caller We were substituted. How do I get over this and just put it in my memory as something that was great?

1:10:07 Drew What's he in jail for?

1:10:09 Caller He, I told you, he introduced two people that did a drug run.

1:10:14 Adam I see.

1:10:14 Drew And he doesn't do any drugs himself at all?

1:10:17 Adam And when does he get out of jail?

1:10:19 Caller He, he's looking at one to three.

1:10:21 Adam So how, I don't know how long he's been in though. That could be tomorrow he gets out.

1:10:25 Caller But by the time he, by the time he gets out, his girlfriend will be out and my husband will be out. So pretty much it's over.

1:10:32 Drew And how many, how is it that he's going one to three on his first offense?

1:10:36 Adam Oh, wait a minute. Just hold on. Rose, what if you spring him with a, you know, daring helicopter out in the, out, out in the work yard kind of move or something, get a good six, eight months with him before everyone else gets paroled? Or you call some sort of prison riot. You know, you know, it's a bad sign. Hold on a second. When you're pining for a guy who is not going to be paroled for another year or so, but the problem is, is his old lady and your old man are going to be paroled simultaneously. So you never have any real alone time. I mean, it is certain when you kill yourself as a human being, you know, when you just look in the mirror and go, look, I'm waiting. My best friends, you know, the guy, my husband and the guy I'm cheating with is in the both in and then my best friends getting paroled. Everyone's getting paroled at the same time. Ironically, be funny if she got sent in as they were coming out like they passed each other introducing at the gate. Yeah. Hey, Rose. First thing I'd like you to do if I'm sure your parents aren't a lot. Your dad isn't, right? But your mom is?

1:11:44 Caller No, neither one of them are.

1:11:46 Adam They're both died. Okay. I was going to have now. I'd like you to urinate on their grave because they did a horrible, horrible job with you. They really failed you.

1:11:53 Caller Why? For picking?

1:11:55 Adam Yes. Yes. You hang out with horrible people.

1:11:57 Caller No, they're really good.

1:11:58 Adam Yes. They're great. They're great. Okay.

1:12:00 Caller No, they really are.

1:12:01 Adam Okay. Well, listen, there's nothing you can do. You still haven't told me when they're coming out. You told me they're doing one to three, but I don't know when they went in.

1:12:09 Caller Well, the girlfriend's coming out about November.

1:12:13 Adam Okay.

1:12:13 Caller And my husband's coming out about May.

1:12:15 Adam Okay. Well, hopefully, they'll have a nice new tattoo and plenty of stories to regale you with. And your job is that you don't have any kids, do you?

1:12:23 Caller Two.

1:12:24 Caller Two of them.

1:12:24 Adam Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho.

1:12:26 Caller Yeah.

1:12:26 Adam How old are they?

1:12:28 Caller 15 and 13.

1:12:30 Adam I hope they're girls so they get into prostitution and not into violence.

1:12:33 Caller No, you guys got it all. You got it all.

1:12:35 Adam What are they?

1:12:36 Caller I mean, you guys got it all wrong.

1:12:37 Adam What are they? Boys?

1:12:38 Caller Boy and a girl.

1:12:39 Adam Yeah, all right. You keep that boy from killing people, you understand?

1:12:42 Caller Oh, he's a good kid.

1:12:43 Adam All right. By your standards.

1:12:45 Caller No, he is a good kid. He got AB all through summer school. He's doing good.

1:12:49 Adam Okay.

1:12:49 Caller And my daughter's an AB on a roll. They used to be, I know you disagree with this, but they used to be in Christian schools.

1:12:56 Adam All right. No, I'm fine with that.

1:12:57 Drew Oh, so you get them back in there.

1:12:59 Caller And I used to be a foster mother.

1:13:00 Drew That does not surprise us at all.

1:13:01 Caller Okay, baby.

1:13:02 Caller So it's a wrong place, wrong time.

1:13:05 Adam Okay, I understand.

1:13:06 Caller Bad timing.

1:13:06 Caller You don't believe that, right?

1:13:07 Adam No, I know. I know that sometimes people do time just for introductions and being in the wrong place.

1:13:13 Caller Sometimes people do stupid things. Right.

1:13:15 Adam That's fine. Listen, you take care of your kids, don't have any more, and forget about this guy you're pining for that's in prison. You got your old man coming out.

1:13:24 Caller That would be nice, because he's the one that listens to you every night, and he thinks you guys are great, and you guys don't even know him to know.

1:13:31 Adam I know he's a wonderful individual. I'm just saying you can't do anything. This is just something in the past.

1:13:38 Caller It's a nice memory.

1:13:39 Adam That's right. Okay. Listen, I don't want to... Listen, all you incarcerated guys, you know, I'm your best friend on the outside. I don't need you putting a shiv in me or anything. I'm big fans of the incarcerated. I know you're all there for being wrongly accused. It's all that, you didn't... You're all been framed. That's what I'm saying. I have no problem with any of you. Anna?

1:14:06 Yes.

1:14:07 Adam You're 19?

1:14:08 Caller Yes, I am.

1:14:08 Adam What's up?

1:14:09 Caller Well, about four years ago, I started doing speed and I started slamming and I was forced to stop.

1:14:22 Adam Slamming is shooting speed?

1:14:23 Caller Yeah.

1:14:24 Adam All right.

1:14:24 Drew What do you mean you were forced to stop?

1:14:26 Caller Well, it was just because my boyfriend was like, it's either me or that and I didn't want to be the junkie.

1:14:31 Drew Okay.

1:14:32 Caller So, but I never really, it was always like, oh, I didn't stop. I'm just waiting to relapse.

1:14:36 Drew Right. You're just taking some time off.

1:14:38 Caller Yeah. So, I really didn't fall back into it, but I did it between now and then. But in the beginning of the year, my boyfriend went to jail and I was bored. And I went down the street.

1:14:51 Drew Can you introduce someone?

1:14:52 Caller And...

1:14:53 Mix Master Mike You got some speed?

1:14:54 Caller Yes.

1:14:55 Mix Master Mike Okay.

1:14:56 Caller And I started getting high again.

1:14:58 Mix Master Mike Right. Are you lonely?

1:14:59 Caller I was very lonely and bored.

1:15:02 Drew Well, bored is just the feeling you have before depression. Bored is what addicts experience as a way of trying to get them to go do something, lest they have a feeling. So, I'm bored. I got to do something. I got to do something. I got to do something.

1:15:14 Adam You do the speed alone, though, huh?

1:15:16 Caller No.

1:15:17 Adam Oh, okay. Because that doesn't sound like a good alone drug.

1:15:20 Caller No, it's not nice alone.

1:15:22 Adam Right. You end up picking at yourself.

1:15:25 Caller Yeah, something like that.

1:15:26 Mix Master Mike So, you're saying all your friends do it around you?

1:15:29 Caller No. Not... It depends who it is. I mean, it's something you want to keep hush-hush.

1:15:34 Adam Right.

1:15:35 Caller But it's something that you can share with some people.

1:15:38 Drew What's the question?

1:15:39 Caller My question is, is at the beginning of the year, I fell into it really hard. And then around March, I lost everything. My house, my freedom, I went to jail, I lost my car, my job, everything.

1:15:52 Mix Master Mike That'll do it to you.

1:15:55 Caller And then I was like, okay, well, now I'll stop. Because I just... I don't want to be the junkie.

1:16:00 Drew Well, Anna, you will not stop without treatment. There's just no such thing. This is a disease. It has progression. It will not stop by itself.

1:16:07 Adam Are you doing it now?

1:16:10 Drew This is what makes it addiction. Hang on a second. If you could just stop because you wanted to stop, you're not an addict. You could just stop because you decided you wanted to stop. Enjoy. Go ahead and stop. But the whole nature of being an addict is you can't stop. And when you can't stop, it's because of a certain biology that's been triggered that has to be treated.

1:16:30 Adam Drew is never more animated than when he's telling someone they have a big problem.

1:16:34 Caller Well, like yesterday morning, I woke up and I just had it on my mind.

1:16:39 Adam All right.

1:16:40 Drew Listen, you're an addict.

1:16:41 Adam Yeah. You got to get treatment.

1:16:42 Drew You have to be treated. There's just no, you have no option unless you want to die of this disease.

1:16:46 Caller I mean like antidepressants. I've been in accounting and...

1:16:48 Drew No, no, no. You need to get into a program. You need to spend a few months in a program. You don't spend at least three months somewhere. And if you don't do it, this ain't going to get better.

1:16:57 Mix Master Mike And all the friends you do it with, you just need to cut them off and just clean yourself up, you know?

1:17:03 Adam Hey, Anna. Look, here's the deal. The speed's a horrible, horrible drug. It's not a friendly drug like mushrooms or weed or peyote or ecstasy or coke or alcohol. What would I leave out? Oh, booze. Oh my Christ, I almost forgot booze. Should I break into subsections of booze? Vodka, whiskey, scotch. Okay, it's not a good, it's an evil, evil drug. You're 19 years old. You've already lost everything. You've already done time. You don't want to, it'll kill you. But even if it doesn't, it'll just ruin your life.

1:17:34 Drew It will not work to switch another drug either.

1:17:36 Adam Here's the deal, you have to quit, let's just do it now. And let's do it professionally.

1:17:42 Mix Master Mike While you're still young.

1:17:43 Caller That's so hard.

1:17:45 Adam I know.

1:17:45 Drew If it were easy, you'd do it.

1:17:47 Adam You would have done it already.

1:17:48 Drew Listen, go to a sober living, spend a few months there.

1:17:50 Adam That's it.

1:17:51 Caller I can't afford something like that though.

1:17:52 Drew It's about 400 bucks a month.

1:17:53 Adam Hold on, hold on, Drew. Drew, would you shut up? You can't afford not to.

1:17:59 Drew Because man.

1:18:00 Adam You can't afford not to. Thank you.

1:18:01 Drew Because the world.

1:18:03 Caller Shut up.

1:18:05 Adam All right, Anna.

1:18:05 Drew Anderson, help.

1:18:06 Adam Take care of yourself, please. The world is your oyster. I mean, because that's all the world is. You can't afford not to.

1:18:14 Drew And listen, she could stay at a sober living for the cost of one week of her speed habit. Oh yeah? Yes.

1:18:22 Adam She's that much now, huh?

1:18:24 Drew She found the money to spend it on the speech.

1:18:26 Adam Say, now that I'm rich and coke has never been cheaper, I'm thinking about getting back at it.

1:18:32 Drew You'll be hell to deal with. I'm going to have you bad enough when you're sober.

1:18:35 Adam Really? You think I'd be bad enough? I think I'd be bad enough. You don't think I'd be better on coke?

1:18:41 Drew Oh, please.

1:18:42 Caller Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba.

1:18:47 Adam Mix Master Mike is here. We're going to take ourselves a little break. I'm going to do a little bump with Drusky, some of that good pharmaceutical stuff he keeps in the trunk of his van. And we'll be back after this. Hey, everybody. Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Drew. Mix Master Mike is here tonight. Spin Cycle's the name of the CD. It is out coming up this Tuesday. And the day before that, on Monday, he can be found at the Virgin Megastore on Sunset, eight o'clock, signing them CDs. So get out there, get out there early, get in line, get the CD, get Mix Master Mike to do a sign for you. Now, let's talk to Earl, who's 34. Earl?

1:19:28 Yeah.

1:19:28 Adam What's up there, Earl?

1:19:30 You're a genius, Earl. I can get your name, Adam.

1:19:34 Adam Thank you.

1:19:35 But I was calling about the guy who, the little kid that was 14 years old. I'm 49, and I was taking those shots at one time. I stopped them, though.

1:19:47 Adam You were taking the growth hormone shots?

1:19:49 Yeah. But they wouldn't have worked for me. All they would have did is just like for me to grow hair, have a harder...

1:19:58 Adam Is growth a hormone? Is that a steroid?

1:20:01 Pretty much.

1:20:02 Drew No, it's a peptide.

1:20:03 But when I was younger, they had some pills called anavoid.

1:20:08 Drew Yeah, well, that's androgenic anabolic steroids.

1:20:10 Adam Okay. And it didn't make you grow. Or maybe it did. Who knows? Maybe it would have been 3.5.

1:20:16 It did, just a little, not much.

1:20:18 Drew Yeah, those drugs actually caused the growth plates to close early and actually you end up shorter when you take those drugs.

1:20:25 So the doctor I'm seeing now, he said if I was taking testosterone earlier, maybe I could have been taller or whatever. But I was taking the testosterone just recently, but I stopped because I got tired of going like every few Fridays just to go get a shot in the world.

1:20:49 Drew Well, you know they have testosterone patches now, and creams and things, you don't have to have the shots.

1:20:53 Yeah.

1:20:54 Adam How's, you just put those right on your balls?

1:20:57 Drew In that area.

1:20:57 Adam I see.

1:20:58 No, I was getting a shot in the butt every other Friday.

1:21:03 Drew You don't have to get the shots.

1:21:04 Adam How's your life been as a short person? It's been all right?

1:21:07 Yeah, it's cool.

1:21:08 Adam And you know, you're 4'9, so you're not technically a midget or a dwarf, are you?

1:21:13 Caller No. I have to take my ID everywhere I go. I go in a place and I want some beer and things like, get there, come, it's like, ID, you know.

1:21:21 Adam That's the other thing I didn't address. Another perk of being a small person is- You never get old. You do a thimble of scotch and you're effed up, right? You really save some money on booze.

1:21:31 Drew And food too.

1:21:32 Caller Exactly.

1:21:33 Adam The guy pours you a shot in the camp, the Jane B bottle, and you just do it and you're effed up.

1:21:38 Caller Yeah. Exactly.

1:21:40 Adam All right. So, your life's going OK, Errol?

1:21:43 Caller Yeah, it's going fine.

1:21:45 Adam Good. I'm glad to hear that.

1:21:47 Caller All right.

1:21:47 Adam Well, thanks for checking in. All right. Good times.

1:21:50 Caller All right. You too.

1:21:51 Adam Enjoy that leg room and coach.

1:21:53 Caller I sure will.

1:21:53 Adam All right.

1:21:54 Caller Okay.

1:21:55 Drew That's why I was questioning that other caller who was taking the growth hormone, was that he didn't have the usual indication for it. He just didn't know, at least, whether he was pen, pad, hypo, pit, or what was going on with him.

1:22:03 Adam But, Drew, wouldn't you need to take that growth hormone in your sort of normal growth cycle, life cycle? I mean, if you started taking that thing at 30, it's not going to do anything. You're done.

1:22:16 Drew Yeah, you're done. Yeah. The growth plates are closed.

1:22:19 Adam After 18, after 17.

1:22:21 Drew Yeah, the puberty is when the final growth spurt occurs.

1:22:24 Adam So you need to be taking that thing from what, 13 to 18, basically, otherwise the window shuts and that's about it. And other than that, you just got to get on the rack, right?

1:22:33 Right.

1:22:34 Adam All right, we will talk to Michelle, who's 36. Michelle?

1:22:39 Yeah.

1:22:39 Adam What's up?

1:22:40 Well, my daughter's 15 years old. She is dating a 21-year-old. And I know, okay, it's a long thing. She was molested by my ex-fiance, her stepdad, who's now in prison.

1:22:56 Drew Oh, well, she's going to have all kinds of stuff with men and she's going to pick abusive men. Does she get her much treatment?

1:23:02 Oh, yeah. Yeah, she's in major treatment. She ran away from home for like a month, did all kinds of drugs, ended up in Juvenile Hall for two weeks, is now back home.

1:23:12 Drew So this recently happened?

1:23:14 Yeah. Well, I just, I found out about it in January.

1:23:18 Adam And you broke up with the guy or?

1:23:20 Well, we were, we were already broken up.

1:23:22 Drew Oh, you just found out, you just found out in January that she'd been being sexually abused?

1:23:26 Yes.

1:23:26 Adam How long did it go on?

1:23:28 For two years.

1:23:30 Adam Oh, bad times.

1:23:31 Drew See, this takes a, this is not, you can't, oh, she's had all kinds of treatment.

1:23:34 Adam Yes.

1:23:34 Drew This takes a long time to do anything.

1:23:38 I have so much guilt for not seeing.

1:23:40 Adam Right.

1:23:41 You know, not seeing what I should have seen.

1:23:42 Adam Were you victimized this way at some point?

1:23:44 Never.

1:23:45 Adam Never, really?

1:23:46 Caller Never.

1:23:47 Adam Just hooked up with this guy, huh?

1:23:49 Caller I trusted him. I mean, he was like one of the most trustworthy, I thought, people ever.

1:23:54 Adam Yeah, that's why you never trust the trustworthy.

1:23:56 Caller Oh, God, I don't trust anybody anymore.

1:23:58 Drew All the more reason why we got to believe something happened to you.

1:24:01 Adam Alcoholic dad, at least?

1:24:02 Caller Nope.

1:24:04 Adam Really? Just, just. You should really feel bad now, because you just got bad, you got a bent antenna. You got hooked up with a bad guy. Okay, well, look, I don't want to beat you up, even though I seem to enjoy it. But let's talk about here and now. How about this 21-year-old guy? How bad a guy is he?

1:24:24 Caller Well, he doesn't seem to be a bad guy. He just, I mean, I don't think he has a job. He does tattoos, I guess.

1:24:30 Drew Michelle, please, Michelle, Michelle, Michelle, what is with you? Well, I mean, I, You can't tell what's with the guy that's going to be potentially destructive for him?

1:24:38 Adam Well, here's the problem, Michelle. You have a 21-year-old guy who's dating a 15-year-old.

1:24:44 Drew He's flawed.

1:24:45 Adam So he's bad by definition.

1:24:46 Drew He's flawed.

1:24:47 Adam Even if you got the world's greatest 21-year-old who thought it was a good idea to date a 15-year-old, he'd still be a bad guy.

1:24:53 Caller Right, and my daughter's whole thing is that, oh well, you know, my mentality, of course, is not 15.

1:24:58 Drew Michelle, she's 15.

1:25:00 Caller Right.

1:25:01 Drew What is up with you?

1:25:01 Adam I know, but what is she supposed to do? I mean, because at this point, it seems like she's on damage control. Let's not get her pregnant. Let's not get her an STD.

1:25:10 Drew Contain and get her into treatment. Get her into... She needs long-term treatment. Contain her and be very, very firm with the limit setting. Don't just let it ride. It's going to let it ride into further and further destructive behaviors.

1:25:25 Adam Okay, we'll take a break. Go out on that happy note. All righty. Well, there you go. Another fantastic week of Loveline in the ground. I want to thank Mixmaster Mike for coming in here and hanging out with us.

1:25:40 Mix Master Mike Hear that?

1:25:42 Adam SpinCycle, the name of the CD at the Virgin Megastore and Sunset on Monday, and then the CD comes out on Tuesday, everybody. So do not miss that. I want to thank Damian for doing a great job on the phones. Always in a good mood over there. I want to thank Tara. Don't call me Tara. God damn it. Is that right?

1:26:01 Drew You got it right.

1:26:02 Adam Always screw that one up. What's this other one?

1:26:04 Drew Lauren. Don't call me Lauren.

1:26:08 Adam For bringing her dog here and basically looking after the dog and the pretzels. And of course, our own Mixmaster, Engineer Anderson. I hate that guy. Sliding those potentiometers up and down. And until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. I'm going to barbecue your ass, boy.

1:26:32 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Thursday, September 6, 2001