Episode 1000754886877

1:02 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Adam Hey!

1:16 Drew Oh, happiness.

1:17 My name is Adam.

1:19 Adam There's a nice fart go. Just about two and a half seconds for we went on the air. Hey!

1:27 Drew It's sort of a ritualistic kind of greeting you provide for me. It's nice. Good times.

1:32 Voiceover Loveline.

1:33 Drew Let's really set the stage here. You're on the phone talking to God knows who with your hand over your face so we couldn't converse.

1:38 Adam Right.

1:38 Drew Music goes on, you put the headphones on, you let out a huge fart and then we talk. It's good. It's nice.

1:44 Adam Well, I was talking to a friend of mine who's friends with Ethan, the guy who won Survivor and he was hanging out with him last night. He talked about wanting to come on the show, so I was doing a little Loveline business there.

2:00 Drew Ah, yes sir.

2:01 Adam You see?

2:02 Drew Yeah. Okay.

2:03 Adam So now, the story is, well actually, we're going to see what we can do for possibly Wednesday, Thursday of this week.

2:13 Drew You are my teacher. Bring him on with Dianne's up here. We'll just make like old Loveline days, doing Dianne and a guest.

2:18 Adam Well, he was a little drunk and at first, he thought he was doing the man show, which he wanted to do apparently. Then he thought he was doing Loveline, the TV show and then we're going to have to-

2:32 Drew Totally freak him out. Bring it up here when Dianne's up here on Tuesday.

2:36 Adam Yeah, Dianne Farr who used to be our co-host on Loveline and is now on The Job, is coming in here on Tuesday.

2:48 Drew By the way, thank you for not looking at me when you ask that question. The Job, looking out at the Peanut Gallery.

2:52 Adam Yeah.

2:52 Drew Knowing better than to ask me anything like that.

2:54 Adam It's that Dennis Leary show that's supposed to be real good. Okay. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew Borth, the Certified Physician, Addiction Medicine Specialist. Yeah? Yeah. All right. Here we go. Let's speak to Justin who's 15. Justin?

3:12 Hey, what's up, Adam? What's up, Drew?

3:14 Drew Justin?

3:15 Yeah. I was feeling up my girlfriend, and I noticed one of her boobs was bigger than the other, and I wanted to know how to tell her that I don't care.

3:23 Adam Maybe one of your hands is smaller than the other.

3:27 Drew How about just behaving like you don't care? You know what I mean? And let her bring it up.

3:33 Adam Well, also, when you don't mention something or don't complain about something or don't point something out, it's sort of a way of saying it's cool.

3:41 Drew It's fine, yeah.

3:42 Adam Yeah, either...

3:43 Drew As long as, if it does bother you, then you get that weird energy thing going. We should have said something long ago.

3:48 Adam Right.

3:49 Drew But you don't care, so what the hell? Don't say anything.

3:52 Adam Why don't you just act like you don't know?

3:55 Drew And by the way, it's a common thing, and it's no big deal. And it may equalize as she gets older.

4:00 Adam And if she does bring it up, you just sort of pretend like you didn't notice. No, no, no, no.

4:05 Drew Just say like you noticed, but it doesn't bother me.

4:07 Adam But then you noticed you didn't say anything.

4:09 Drew I didn't say anything because it's great.

4:10 Adam Watch. You act like you didn't notice. I'm going to bring it up. All right, Justin?

4:14 All right.

4:15 Adam I'll be your girlfriend. Okay, baby?

4:19 All right.

4:20 Adam You want a hand job or something?

4:21 All right.

4:22 Adam Okay. Hey, Justin?

4:27 Drew That'll change in half.

4:28 Adam I already don't believe him. No, no. You're lying.

4:31 Drew No, no.

4:31 Adam I know that grunt. Justin? Yeah, it's me. It's your girlfriend?

4:36 Yeah.

4:37 Adam I have this thing. I don't know. It's kind of embarrassing, but one of my boobs is bigger than the other.

4:47 So?

4:49 Drew Okay, she's going to kill herself right now.

4:51 Adam Yeah, one's bigger than the other. I don't know if you could tell, but it's kind of weird for me.

4:56 Sorry, it doesn't bother me.

4:57 Adam Oh, it doesn't? You mean you've noticed?

5:00 Oh, s***.

5:02 Adam Oh, Justin. Yes. Just use the S-word on the air.

5:07 Drew You know, he needs some time to find his through-line. He needs to prepare. He needs his lines straightened out.

5:12 Adam Yeah.

5:13 Drew It's unfair, Adam.

5:14 Adam You know, there's been a lot of involuntary use of the S-word on this show in the past 10 days.

5:21 Drew Yeah. The expletive.

5:23 Adam People not being aggressive with it, just O-S. Under the breath, S-word. Yelling like off the phone, shut the S up, you know. I mean, just a lot of sneaking of the S-word on the show.

5:37 Drew And the F-word too.

5:37 Adam Yeah. Go ahead, Anderson.

5:38 The F-word was definitely in there.

5:39 Drew I blame the screeners at this point.

5:41 Adam Uh-huh. And who are they? Oh, them? Them. Those two? I thought they were the coffee mules. Those guys do the phones?

5:49 Drew Poorly.

5:52 Adam All right. Well, as you know, Drew, whenever I roll that role-playing dice on the show, always snake dice.

6:00 Drew Not always. No.

6:01 Adam Almost always. No. It can be funny, but it's never because they, anyone comes through.

6:05 Drew That's a good point.

6:06 Adam All right. Andy?

6:08 Yeah?

6:08 Adam You're 13?

6:09 Caller Yeah. Um, I kind of, Adam, I kind of want to know how you were discovered.

6:15 Adam Man show's on, by the way.

6:16 Drew I discovered him.

6:17 Adam I heard it mentioned that.

6:17 Drew I discovered him.

6:19 Adam Yeah. I was discovered.

6:20 Drew By me.

6:22 Adam Not really.

6:23 Drew Well, Jimmy, like, gave you some playtime.

6:26 Adam I did some gay porn in the late 70s.

6:27 Drew And he gave you some opportunity to hone your crap. But really, what really broke you?

6:33 Adam I was working as a boxing instructor. They were doing a boxing match on the mother station, K-Rock. And I volunteered to train one of the guys and met Jimmy, my partner and now lover, who was doing sports. Life partner who was doing sports on the radio show.

6:50 Hey, Adam.

6:51 Adam Yeah.

6:51 Drew He's not free, he doesn't really care.

6:53 Adam Does that ever work, by the way?

6:55 Drew What? Telling the story?

6:56 Adam Well, no, just any story when anybody under 18 asks, how did you or where did you get the idea? Does it ever feel satisfying?

7:09 Drew To us, the story is kind of extraordinary. To them, it's sort of, so what?

7:13 Adam No, but I know, but there's the asking of it.

7:16 Drew I know.

7:17 Adam I'll show you what it feels like. We'll do a little Loveline recreation. You give me just a 10-second answer here, Drew.

7:27 Drew I'm being you?

7:27 Adam No, you be you. Drew, I was curious, what got you interested in medicine?

7:34 Drew Well, when I was growing up, I was very interested in biology, then I was in college, and it was something that interested me. But for a while, I spent some time doing other things, and ultimately, I came back to it with a renewed sense of interest. When I got to medical school, it was something that I found really, truly rewarding and interesting. Are you asleep yet?

7:49 Adam I got another question. Oh. All right, Drew. Now, you screwed it up. You didn't give me 10 seconds, you kept rambling. You kept rambling, you see? You should have cut, that's why I said 10 seconds.

8:00 Drew I'm sorry.

8:00 Adam You had to cut yourself off.

8:01 Drew I didn't get the one at just 10 seconds. I thought you were going to interrupt me at 10 seconds. They normally do like Adam, hey.

8:07 Adam Drew, could this be less a radio show?

8:08 Drew No.

8:09 Adam No, they don't cut you off, they let you answer and then they jump in very quickly to another thing. They never give you like a, oh, I see, you're fascinated. There's no follow up. You answer, you stop, there's a beat of dead air and then they come right in with something else.

8:22 Drew Something unrelated.

8:23 Adam Something unrelated. Yes. Yes, Andy, what was your unrelated question that made me think you were so uninterested in my first answer?

8:29 Caller I'm sorry.

8:30 Adam That's okay.

8:31 Caller I just want to say, Adam, you're my idol.

8:33 Thanks, buddy.

8:35 Caller I have two more little things.

8:36 Adam All right. But you tell me now, how did I get into show business?

8:39 Caller Oh, yeah. How did you get into show business?

8:41 Drew No, we already answered that.

8:42 Adam You tell me.

8:42 Drew What did we say?

8:43 Caller Oh, you said that you were a boxing instructor for the Mother Station, K-Rock?

8:50 Drew No.

8:50 Adam Yeah.

8:51 Drew Well, ultimately.

8:51 Adam All right. Sort of. Go ahead.

8:53 Caller And you taught Jimmy Kimmel or something?

8:56 Adam Okay. All right. That's sort of right.

8:58 Drew And Jimmy Kimmel let him come on the radio and be a character. Then I heard the character and they were looking for somebody to do the TV show and I recommended Adam.

9:07 Adam That's right. So Drew was, Drew did in part discover me.

9:13 Thank God for Dr. Drew.

9:15 Adam Dan?

9:16 Yeah.

9:16 Adam You're 18?

9:17 Caller Yeah.

9:18 Adam What's up?

9:19 Caller Yeah.

9:20 Caller Well, I'm going out with a girl. She's like 15 and we're going out for like seven months and she would be like teasing me and like sexually.

9:32 Drew She's teasing you?

9:33 Caller Yeah.

9:34 Drew What does that mean?

9:36 Caller Like she would get like on me, rubbing against me and stuff like that. And you know, kind of get me on horny and stuff.

9:41 Caller Yeah.

9:41 Drew Well, maybe she's figuring that's about as far as it's going to go.

9:44 Caller No, but like we talk about it and she's like, you know, and then I'm ready for, you know, whatever.

9:50 Drew She says that?

9:51 Caller Yeah, she says that on the phone or like we talk about it and she's 15. Yeah.

9:56 Drew Do you think that's very smart for you?

10:00 Caller Well, I don't know, but like we love each other.

10:03 Adam You're in love?

10:04 Caller Yeah.

10:05 Adam How long have you been going out?

10:07 Caller Seven months. All right.

10:09 Adam Well, are you out of high school?

10:11 Caller Yeah.

10:12 Adam And she's in the ninth grade?

10:15 Caller She's a sophomore, I think.

10:17 Drew She's in the 10th grade, you think?

10:18 Caller Yeah.

10:19 Adam You think? I'm going to deduct a grade for you throwing in the, I think.

10:23 Caller No, I'm almost positive.

10:25 Adam Almost positive she's in the 10th grade?

10:27 Caller Yeah, because I help her with the homework and she's like in Right. Yeah, I mean, Algebra 2.

10:32 Adam She brings her Sullivan book over and you guys help fill it out?

10:35 Caller No, it's like me and her father get along like really good.

10:39 Drew Okay. What does he do? Just out of curiosity.

10:42 Caller What does he do? He's like office stuff, machinery mechanic. Like he would be like fixing faxes, you know, stuff like that.

10:54 Adam He fixes fax machines.

10:56 Caller Yeah.

10:57 Adam Bad gig. Dan, what do you do?

10:59 Caller What do I do?

11:00 Caller I just work at Steak and Shake. It's like McDonald's here.

11:03 Adam Steak and Shake. Yeah. Okay, buddy. All right.

11:06 Caller And I'm in college, too.

11:07 Oh, college.

11:10 Adam Now, Princeton, Harvard, where?

11:13 Caller No, it's just in here in Jacksonville.

11:16 Uh-huh.

11:17 Adam Okay, it's got a junior in front of it?

11:20 Drew Community, they call it out there.

11:21 Caller Yeah, it's community college.

11:22 Adam Yeah, here we call it junior college. It's more derogatory. It makes people feel worse. Because our thing out here is, if you're not going to four-year school, you should feel badly about yourself. We'll call it junior college.

11:36 Drew Well, of course, you'd do nothing to contribute to that.

11:38 Adam No, I actually was trying to get people to call it-

11:42 Drew Weenie College.

11:43 Adam Sort of college, Weenie College, Minnie College, Retard College, Junior College. Junior, it is really insulting. Pee-wee College, Powder Puff College. So, Dan, you better- She's 15. She's in the 10th grade and you're out of high school.

12:07 Drew What's the legal age in Florida?

12:10 Caller I have no clue, guys.

12:11 Drew Andy, get me that United States map with the colors on it. We had a whole breakdown here pinned up on the board here last week.

12:18 Adam Okay. Well, don't do anything she's not ready to do.

12:23 Caller Oh, I'm not. I'm not pushing at all. She's the one with like starting it and like...

12:28 Drew Here's a good piece of advice. Just in general, people's brains truly have not developed to handle what one feels and the responsibilities associated with sex until 16. Really not. It's not a good idea. Just in general principles. It's healthier to wait till after 16.

12:46 Adam Okay. Let's talk to Danielle. Danielle?

12:51 Yeah?

12:51 Adam You're 15? What's up?

12:53 Caller Okay. When I have sex, I don't feel anything like inside me.

12:57 Adam Me neither.

12:59 Caller What the?

13:00 Adam Oh, yeah. Right. You don't feel anything. How often do you have sex?

13:07 Caller Like, often. I like three times a week, four times a week.

13:11 Drew How old is your boyfriend?

13:13 Caller He's 17.

13:15 Drew How old were you when you started having sex?

13:17 Caller It was like in July of this year.

13:19 Drew But nothing before that.

13:20 Adam July of 83.

13:21 Drew Nothing before that.

13:24 Adam Wait a minute.

13:24 She wasn't born yet.

13:26 Drew Wait a minute.

13:28 Adam Not born?

13:29 Drew In 83?

13:29 Adam Yeah.

13:30 Drew Not even close.

13:31 Adam Oh, my God.

13:33 What's that?

13:34 Drew Hey, 87.

13:36 Adam No. Jesus Christ. Hey, Danielle.

13:39 Yeah.

13:41 Adam Doesn't she sound like an old soul? I don't mean that in a great way.

13:45 Drew Yes, she sounds worked.

13:47 Adam Have you seen a lot of bad in your short life?

13:51 Caller No.

13:52 Drew One of the things we hear about oftentimes is women who have had a history of sexual abuse often will feel nothing, no arousal, no stimulation of the genital region when they have sex.

14:02 Caller No.

14:03 Drew Nothing like that for you.

14:05 Adam Are your parents together?

14:07 Caller My dad died when I was two.

14:10 Adam And what happened? How did he die?

14:12 Caller He was shot.

14:14 Drew She hasn't seen.

14:15 Adam She hasn't seen that much.

14:16 Drew No, not much at all.

14:18 Adam Why? Who shot your dad?

14:19 Caller I don't know if I was clued.

14:22 Adam What did you say?

14:23 Caller I don't have any clue.

14:24 Adam No clue.

14:25 Drew You never asked that?

14:27 Adam Did they ever catch the guy?

14:29 Caller No, they said it was suicide, but it was like no way that he could have done it.

14:35 Adam Okay. And what about your mom?

14:38 Drew This is like finding O.J.'s killer.

14:40 Adam Did she have some other boyfriends that were bad?

14:43 Caller Yes, she got remarried and...

14:46 Drew He was a bad guy?

14:47 Caller Yeah, I don't like him. She's still with him to get a divorce, and now she's back with him.

14:51 Adam What did he do that was bad?

14:53 Caller He just raped me. He treats me like crap, so I don't care.

14:57 Drew It's like she's speaking another language sometimes.

14:59 Adam Well, she started to say he just something and then change gears. What does he do?

15:04 Caller He just treats me like crap. He's rude to me. He's like, he calls me bad names and he's like rude. I don't like him.

15:13 Adam Did he ever hit you or anything?

15:15 Caller He did once and then he got it back.

15:19 Drew And your boyfriend, is he someone you really care about?

15:21 Caller Yeah.

15:22 Drew Did your boyfriend force sex on you?

15:24 Caller No.

15:24 Drew Are you on any medication?

15:26 Caller I was on birth control and that's it.

15:29 Drew Good, thank God. By the way, nice choice. Keep in mind, there are patches out there now. If you have trouble remembering to take the pill, once a week patches.

15:35 Adam But you were never sexually touched when you were younger? And when did you lose your virginity? July?

15:45 Caller Yeah.

15:45 Drew When you say you don't feel anything, do you mean you don't have an orgasm or you don't feel anything?

15:49 Caller I don't feel anything.

15:54 Adam Is there anything else wrong? Do you have brothers and sisters?

15:57 Caller Yeah.

15:58 Adam How are they doing?

15:59 Caller Fine, I guess.

16:01 Adam Do you see them?

16:02 Caller Yeah.

16:04 Adam Okay.

16:05 Drew I don't think we're getting anywhere with this.

16:06 Adam All right, Danielle, you sound like angry.

16:08 Drew That's something.

16:09 Adam Like you've seen a lot or something.

16:10 Drew There's something more going on than we're able to get to.

16:13 Adam Are you doing okay in school?

16:15 Yeah.

16:17 Adam You are? You're doing okay in school? Okay. You're going to go to college? What? Yes. Okay. All right. So there's nothing going on. You love your boyfriend, right?

16:36 Drew A little bogosity feel here going on by the way.

16:40 Adam I don't know. What's the biggest problem in your life right now, Danielle?

16:46 Caller What? There was like a noise in my background. I couldn't hear it.

16:51 Adam What's the biggest problem in your life right now? What would you say that is?

16:56 Caller My mom's trying to get out of this house.

16:59 Drew Mom's trying to get out of the house?

17:00 Caller Yeah. We're trying to get out of here, but we have nowhere to go, so we're trying to find somewhere to live.

17:04 Adam You're trying to get away from your stepdad?

17:07 Caller Yeah.

17:08 Adam Why? Is he an alcoholic?

17:10 Caller No.

17:10 Drew He's just an asshole. She told him. She said that.

17:13 Adam He doesn't drink or hit anybody or anything?

17:16 Caller He drinks sometimes. He's not like an alcoholic would.

17:18 Adam Okay. Your mom, is she scared of him?

17:21 No.

17:22 Adam She just wants to get away from him?

17:24 Yeah.

17:24 Drew Even though she divorced him and got back together with him?

17:28 Adam Why doesn't she get him to leave?

17:30 Because this is his house.

17:31 Caller When they got a divorce, this was our house before. When they got a divorce, on the paper, she signed it over to him. They said that if she moved, he would get this house.

17:40 Adam Okay.

17:41 Drew It's just way more here.

17:42 Adam Don't get pregnant.

17:43 Drew She's taking the pill. That's good.

17:44 Adam Stay on that pill.

17:45 Drew The whole of the way is no feeling. We can't quite sort out, but certainly, Danielle, you've had a lot go down in your life, way more than you seem to even realize. That's fine, but take care of yourself.

17:57 Adam Wow. I'm telling you. I know we give this speech once every five weeks. No, it's about every five weeks. So much you can tell from people just hearing their voice, the different tones. You guys will hear it. You'll hear that 14-year-old male who's a virgin and hasn't popped out his first pub yet, and you'll hear that guy who's been to hell and back and has already nailed 15 chicks.

18:21 Drew And you can hear what things are bogus too. This was not bogus by the way.

18:25 Adam No, but this was a 15-year-old girl who sounded like someone who had been divorced twice, had four kids, and one of them died of SIDS. You know what I mean? This is someone who'd seen a lot.

18:37 Drew Yeah.

18:38 Adam You just hear that voice and you go, what is this 15-year-old scene that's been so bad that does this, that makes us give off this vibe? Her father killed himself when she was two. That's probably enough to get you going in that direction. Yeah, that's a very nice start.

18:55 Drew The A-hole stepdad, that's good. Homeless? We're getting there now.

18:59 Adam Mom, who's kind of hooks up with the, I mean, first mom hooked up with the guy who killed himself, and then mom hooked up with the A-hole guy, and then re-hooked with the guy.

19:09 Drew And then gets stuck without a home.

19:12 Adam Well, possibly. She's trying to get out.

19:16 Drew She can't because she will, no, forget it.

19:18 Adam Okay.

19:18 Drew Ryan, what's up? You're 15.

19:20 Caller Yeah. I got a girlfriend and I really love her. She's 13.

19:26 Caller I've been going out for a while.

19:27 Caller I've known her for a couple of years. Oh, boy.

19:29 Drew You knew her since she was 11?

19:31 Caller Yeah.

19:31 Drew And you were 13?

19:33 Caller Yeah.

19:33 Adam But listen.

19:34 Drew Wait a minute. I'm just afraid what's coming.

19:36 Adam He was 13.

19:37 Drew Yeah, but.

19:38 Adam I know. That's huge. That might as well be 20 years.

19:42 Drew Yeah.

19:42 Adam That's two years. All right. Go ahead, there.

19:47 Caller You know, when we started going out a couple of months ago, we were both virgins. Neither of us are anymore. And I started her on drinking. She got me smoking again.

20:03 Caller Smoking what?

20:04 Caller Cigarettes.

20:05 Adam Smoking.

20:06 Caller I don't do pot.

20:07 Adam After, you know, what happened was in 96 when he filed for bankruptcy, he started hitting the bottle pretty hard when he was, when he was eight. And then, you know, she got him back on the, on the butts. Hey, smoking the weed?

20:23 Drew No, no pot.

20:23 Adam That's the pot. She got you back smoking the cigarettes. You got her on the booze.

20:28 Caller Yeah, I was smoking when I was 13. I quit because I was developing a bad cough.

20:33 Drew All right. What do you want? What would you like us to help you with?

20:39 Caller About a month ago, when I took her virginity, she was a really nice person. You know, she would never do anything wrong. In the past month, it's gotten to the point where she's walking down the street turning around and flashing the cars and pulling down her pants on the side of the road. Just to see what people do about it.

21:01 Drew Is she loaded when she's doing that?

21:03 Caller Oh yeah.

21:04 Drew All right. So you got all kinds of problems here, all right? And it's not... Make no mistake, you've contributed nicely to the evolution of this problem, but this is not... You didn't cause this. She has got some major, major issues here that need to be dealt with. I mean major. Yeah. You could start with substance abuse and behavioral disorders and character logic problems. She needs help, Ryan. Can you get her some help? Because this is... She's sitting on a launching pad right now, and what she does now, the choices she makes, the problems she gets herself into, are going to set up a trajectory for the rest of her life. That's the path she's going to start going down. And she's moving pretty quickly down a path that is going to be extremely destructive.

21:48 Caller And I know that's what's worrying me.

21:49 Drew Okay, get her some, get, she needs to get into some care. Psychiatrist, adolescent health specialist, somebody who's used to dealing with these things, this is going to take some work.

21:58 Adam Wait, you know, the way you phrase it, it's as if you taking her virginity, got her-

22:03 Drew Unlatch something.

22:04 Adam Yes, opened a Pandora's box or something. Is that the way you're looking at it?

22:10 Caller That's the way I see it.

22:11 Drew Yeah, she was this-

22:12 Caller Before that night, she was like the perfect little angel, wouldn't do anything that-

22:16 Drew No, no.

22:16 Caller That her parents-

22:17 Drew Yeah, and it may be that she was holding it together and on the surface looked like that. She never had an eating disorder? Oh, maybe she did.

22:27 Caller No, she's a little overweight, but she got that from her mother. She eats fine, really doesn't care about how she looks.

22:34 Adam You don't? Why isn't, why don't you? I'm 37, that's all I think about. You're 15 for Christ's sake. How'd you get so goddamn mature?

22:44 Caller How dare you?

22:45 Adam Well, I mean, Jesus Christ, you make me feel like an asshole. Well, okay.

22:53 Caller Yeah?

22:53 Adam All right, get her some help. Would you cheer up, you idiot? You're 15 years old. Jesus Christ, you sound like Jim Morrison.

23:03 Caller Took this bitch's virginity, known her since she was 11.

23:07 Adam I'm waiting for like riders on the storm to start swelling up.

23:13 Caller Now she walks down the highway with her pants around her ankles. I got her on the booze, she got me on the butts. I gave up the squares at 13, but I met this little lady, and she got me back on the smokes at the ripe old age of 15. Now I'm heading into the 10th grade and I'm lost morally, spiritually, emotionally. She's a big gal but I love her. I don't care what she thinks.

23:44 Drew He needs to get her to some kid.

23:45 Caller Jesus Christ, the kid's 15.

23:48 Adam We just talked to the world's oldest 15-year-olds. Yeah.

23:51 Drew Tonight, so far, yes.

23:52 Adam Danielle, the call before this and this guy. This is what, 15? When I was 15, I was making fart songs up.

24:03 Drew You were burping, saying the alphabet.

24:04 Adam I was trying to do the alphabet burp, and I was trying to do a thing where I cut my hand under my armpit.

24:09 Drew Make farting sounds?

24:10 Adam Yeah, and then laughing like a hyena.

24:15 Caller This lady got me back smoking again.

24:17 Adam Oh my God.

24:18 Caller I'm thinking, I've been doing a lot of thinking. She's drinking, I'm smoking her pants around her ankles, and she's got a hell of a gut on her. Not a pretty lady.

24:29 Drew She needs to get help, or she is going to be in trouble.

24:32 Adam Okay. Everybody, get yourself help, and listen, everyone, just please, all you 15 year olds, please, be 15.

24:41 Drew I'm a dog dog.

24:44 Adam We'll take a break. We'll be right back. Hey, Loveline, I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. We will hop back to the phones now and speak to Eric on line one. Eric? Yeah. You're 20?

25:43 Caller Yes, I am.

25:44 Adam What's up?

25:46 Hey, Adam, that Tim Morrison thing was really cool, right?

25:48 Adam Yeah, thanks.

25:49 I was loving that. I was rolling.

25:50 Adam Drew, you'll be glad to know that I just belched up some Armenian food, which...

25:54 Drew Another night of our... Leftover from Friday, Thursday.

25:58 There was a lot with System of a Down there, didn't you?

25:59 Adam Yeah, we ate a lot of food with System of a Down, a lot of Armenian food, and I took all of it home and polished it off.

26:05 Drew Tonight.

26:06 Adam Well, not all of it, but half of it.

26:08 Drew I had some few good smells come out of me after that food.

26:10 Adam Thank you. Yeah. Eric, go ahead there, buddy.

26:13 Well, I've got a friend of mine. I just met her a couple months ago, and she's showing me signs of borderline personality disorder, like to the to the exact definition in my books in your books.

26:27 Drew Which books you have?

26:29 I have understanding psychology. I'm still going to school right now.

26:31 Drew Yeah. And what are you reading? What is your understanding of borderline?

26:36 Well, I just went outside of the definition.

26:38 Drew Well, just tell me your sense of it.

26:40 Basically, not being able to define yourself and needing to be in one way relationships in order to love.

26:45 Drew That's a common feature.

26:47 Yeah.

26:48 Drew So but the more more the way you're going to know borderlines is more how they make you feel and they often they'll be very gratifying to a certain point, make you feel really good about yourself and then once they've got you in, we'll sort of bring you into a world of chaos.

27:04 Right.

27:04 Drew You'll feel like turned upside down all the time.

27:06 Yeah. Okay. Well, see, here's the problem is that I hooked her up with my best friend and my best friend is the one who's experienced this world of chaos right now.

27:15 Drew Yeah. Well, there you go. How old is she?

27:17 She is 18. She just turned 18.

27:19 Drew Is she doing drugs?

27:20 No, she doesn't do drugs at all.

27:21 Adam No drugs, no alcohol. Do you have a girlfriend?

27:23 Yes, I do.

27:24 Adam You do?

27:25 Yeah.

27:25 Adam Well, why don't you just focus on her?

27:28 Because she's starting to get to the point where she's almost going to hurt anyone around my best friend now and she's not listening to me when I'm saying, I think she has a problem and I can't talk to her.

27:37 Drew She wants physically to harm anyone?

27:40 Yeah. Who gets near my friend now?

27:41 Drew Including his male friends.

27:43 Yeah. She really wants all the attention and she gets extremely-

27:47 Adam Tell your friend to dump her.

27:49 He tried already, like three times.

27:51 Drew Yeah. It's hard to know what's going on with her, but yes, these are borderline qualities. You need to set limits of people borderline. First time I heard you learn about limit setting in your psychology class?

28:02 Yeah, exactly. All right.

28:04 Drew We'll set limits for her.

28:05 I want to know how should I get her help? Because I don't want to just get away from her because she could end up hurting herself or hurt someone else.

28:12 Drew You can bring up help and you can certainly bring it up to your friend, but your job is not to be treating. Your job is to manage her and to keep her from harming you or your friend, and just set limits with her. Set real firm about what you will and will not tolerate as appropriate behavior.

28:27 Adam All right.

28:27 Drew She'll be all right with that.

28:28 Adam Yeah. Eric sounds like a decent dude. Yeah. Let's-

28:31 Drew He smokes a little pot.

28:32 Adam Yeah, you think? Yeah.

28:33 Drew Check it out.

28:34 Adam Yeah.

28:34 Drew Come on.

28:34 Adam Check it out. Eric? Yeah. How much weed do you smoke? None.

28:41 Never smoke. Never smoke.

28:43 Adam Really? All right. I believe you, buddy. It was Drew that didn't believe you.

28:48 Drew I believe him now.

28:49 Adam I can't think of that. He's just got that boyish sound. Michelle?

28:54 Drew Yeah.

28:55 Adam You're 17?

28:56 Caller Yeah.

28:57 Adam What's going on?

28:58 Caller Well, I've had this problem where it all happened back in June. That I came up to Ohio and I started getting out of control. I started smoking weed and then I started having sex.

29:15 Drew Well, hang on now. What do you mean you came up to Ohio? Did you moved away from your friends or did you move in with someone?

29:20 Caller What happened?

29:22 Caller My family moved up here.

29:23 Drew Why?

29:23 Caller Away from all my friends because my dad's job.

29:26 Drew And did that make you depressed?

29:29 Caller I got really depressed.

29:31 Adam Okay.

29:31 Drew Because that's a common sort of manifestation of depression. Somebody your age is sleeping around doing drugs, grades getting bad. You may not necessarily cry or complain of feeling depressed, but those behaviors are a good sign that that's what's happening.

29:43 Adam Where did you move from?

29:45 Caller I moved from Texas.

29:47 Adam And you just moved how long ago?

29:50 Caller Back in January. It's actually been one year.

29:53 Drew Really, the way I look at this is someone really struggling with trying to feel better. But all the solutions you find that make you feel better in the moment really are the problems and ultimately make you feel worse. Have you asked to be seen to get some treatment for this? For the depression?

30:11 Caller Yeah. Yeah, I've seen a few psychiatrists and stuff like that.

30:15 Drew Since you came to Cincinnati?

30:17 Caller Yeah.

30:18 Drew And anybody had to help for you?

30:20 Caller Well, at once I did, you know, talk to someone that really did help me a little bit. I guess it didn't last for long.

30:30 Drew How about going back to that person?

30:33 Caller I've talked to my parents and they said, yeah, maybe time. Yeah. It's just I, my time conflicts with work and-

30:41 Drew Look, Michelle, let's look. Do you want to get better? Do you want to feel better?

30:45 Caller Yes.

30:45 Drew Do you want these behaviors to settle down?

30:47 Caller Yes.

30:47 Drew All right. It's not going to happen unless you get some help with this. Go back and talk to that person. It sounds, frankly, like you should be on some medication, too.

30:53 Adam Really?

30:54 Drew Yeah.

30:55 Adam Why? She sounded like she had it kind of under control.

30:59 Drew That's the point about depression and that age group. It's not how they tell you or how they feel. It's what they do, their behaviors.

31:05 Adam Well, there's a lot of 17-year-olds sort of act out this way. Yeah.

31:11 Drew Oh, yeah. But it's usually depression.

31:12 Adam All right. Well, she may have been depressed, but she did seem like she had a decent understanding of it. Yeah.

31:19 Drew She had insight, and indeed, talk is extremely important for her. But my concern is the reason I say medication, not that I love pushing pills, but she's engaging behaviors can be harmful to her. It needs to be sort of turned around real fast before something bad does happen.

31:34 Adam Oh, Jesus. Could you imagine your family moving to Ohio when you were 16? How would you have been with that?

31:42 Drew Are you kidding? I didn't know how it existed. I would have been like, I was lost enough.

31:48 Adam I wouldn't have gone. I would have gladly just told my loser family to hit the road. I would have never, ever gone, ever, never. No way. You go into a high school, you're playing sports, you got your friends. No way. I think actually.

32:06 Drew It might have been good for you. Think about it.

32:08 Adam No. I think it's a very sad testimonial to me and my family. But when people talk about, yeah, I hear people all the time. They're like, then my junior year in high school, we moved to Texas. I'm like, are you kidding?

32:22 Drew Yeah. How?

32:23 Adam How did you leave your friends? Did you play sports in the 10th grade, and then you're going to go to a new school? You didn't know the coach or anything? Yeah. It was unthinkable. Yeah. Unthinkable. Yeah. I would have gladly just stayed at the Y, gladly, and sent them packing, not in a million years. You know what? I could have pulled it off too. I mean, they would have been-

32:47 Drew It would have been about the same, right? It's what happened.

32:50 Adam Well, they would have been okay with it. I could have gotten by with it.

32:53 Drew Oh, they would have liked that too?

32:55 Adam They would have let me do it, I think.

32:58 Drew At 14?

32:59 Adam Oh, not at 14, but 15 or 16. I think so, yeah. I could have stayed with a friend. I would have moved in with a friend.

33:04 Drew Yeah, yeah.

33:05 Adam That's- If my family had moved. Where are they going? Beau?

33:09 Yeah.

33:09 Adam You're 29?

33:11 Caller Yep.

33:12 Adam You were molested by a man. Yeah. Now you're a father. Yeah. And so what's the question?

33:20 Caller I just wanted to make a statement that, you know, there are people out there that have problems and that are raising their kids and have good children and are good fathers or good parents, you know.

33:31 Adam How old is your kid?

33:34 Caller I have a seven year old, a two year old and a little baby.

33:38 Drew How old were you when you were abused?

33:40 Caller I was six.

33:42 Drew Well, you're making a point that perhaps we don't make enough, which is about 60 percent of people who are abused do not abuse. So.

33:49 Caller Right. My wife was abused also. I had nothing at home.

33:53 Adam Hey, can you guys not have any more kids, please?

33:57 Caller No, we're stopping.

33:58 Adam Good. Thank you.

34:00 Drew All right. Good. You lift our spirits tonight.

34:03 Adam Yeah.

34:04 Caller Well, the seven year old is not my kid. I mean, it was hurt before and I'm raising him.

34:08 Adam Okay.

34:09 Caller On my own.

34:09 Adam You know, here's how I think most of this stuff manifests itself, Bo and God bless you for not abusing your kids. I'll tell you, you're a real hero these days when you don't abuse your kids. When bad things happen to you, you either go ahead and do those or you make sure like hell you don't. Oftentimes and then sometimes you slip and waffle a little bit.

34:36 Drew As you know, that when you get these sort of fixed preferences, sexual drives like you have with the breasts, they're hard to-

34:45 Adam How dare you?

34:47 Drew I'm not, I'm just stating a fact.

34:48 Adam Go ahead.

34:48 Drew I'm not criticizing you yet.

34:50 Adam Go ahead.

34:50 Drew It just becomes difficult to take you off that path.

34:55 Adam Yes.

34:55 Drew You know what I'm saying? Yes. Thank God, only about 40 percent of the time, do these arousal mechanisms get etched in that way.

35:02 Adam Yes.

35:03 Drew The problem is that the guys that do have that etched in, want to do that repeatedly to multiple victims.

35:08 Adam Right. That's the horrible part about it. But just in terms of your family and what happens to you, and do you then pass that along to your kids, there's a couple ways it can work. I mean, sometimes your family can do something to you and you can just become your dad. Or become your mom. And then you can become the antithesis of them. You can say, I'm never going to be like that. And then sometimes you kind of do both. Like, your dad was super, super cheap, right? The word is that he would steal a kernel of corn off a bingo cart. Like that cheap, right?

35:44 Drew I don't know that.

35:45 Adam Yeah, well that's what Drew said. Drew's dad was super, super cheap. Super, super incredibly cheap. Now, Drew is not cheap, but Drew has issues about money. But Drew spends a ton of money, but there's issues around. There's energy there. And it doesn't stop you from spending a lot of money. And you spend plenty on your kids. Yet, there's energy there. So, it's sort of, it's overcome and even overcompensated for some time, but you don't get off scot-free. There's energy surrounding it. But then, some of that energy is just not being like your dad, right?

36:25 Drew I mean, you're fighting against that.

36:26 Adam You're fighting against it, yes.

36:28 Drew Or being not like it, but having a superego that is like it.

36:32 Adam Yeah, it's just, it's an interesting thing and you wonder what your kids will pick up from that. Sure, it's going to cost them some therapy or whatever it is. Because it's not going to be good. It won't be pretty. Deborah?

36:44 Yes?

36:45 Adam You're 29?

36:46 Drew Yeah, we got to go to break.

36:47 Adam Yeah, we got to go to break. What are you doing calling?

36:49 I'll wait.

36:49 Drew What's your question?

36:50 I actually just broke up with somebody last week, but we were together for 14 months and he said that he had psoriasis on his penis.

37:00 Adam All right. Hang on. It is Loveline. That's Dr. Drew. We'll get back with Deborah and the psoriasis after this. Hey, yo, Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew in the hissy. In the hissy. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Oh, man. I got to be out in Malibu tomorrow at 8.15.

38:00 Drew For what?

38:01 Adam Son of the Beach.

38:03 Drew What is that now?

38:04 Adam That's the Howard Stern produced FX show.

38:11 Drew I'm pretty excited about it.

38:12 Adam Well, here's, well, anyone who knows where Malibu is...

38:16 Drew 8 o'clock in the morning...

38:17 Adam .knows what L.A.'s like.

38:18 Drew You're going to leave at 6.

38:20 Adam Not me. No, no, no. Let me tell you something. And any celebrities listening, please do this. Do that math. I worked two days on the show. I got about a week on this show. They're doing a big one-hour special. I got about four or five days on it. The first day I showed up at call time was noon. Got in front of the camera, four or 15. Now, here's the comedy about that. Here's my basically my policy is I just leave my house at the call time. If the call time is noon, I leave my house at noon. And so you roll, you get there at 20 after your call time and you still, and now instead of four hours to kill, you got three hours and 40 minutes to kill. But you know the thing that's funny? They're calling at 12, 15, wondering where you are. Right. Then on Friday, I worked, my call time, I think was 10 a.m. I got in front of the camera about 12, 30, and that was pretty good. That's no delays. So now, my call time is 8.15 tomorrow. So what do I do?

39:31 Drew You got a big problem with traffic though.

39:33 Adam Yeah.

39:34 Drew It's Malibu, it's not Hollywood.

39:36 Adam Yeah. You want to know what the comedy is, is the call time was 8.30, and then they called and moved at 8.15, which doesn't sound funny yet, but wait till I'm in my trailer at 11.30, napping and haven't made a move yet. That's when the, hey, guys, glad you called and made it 8.15. Smart, very shrewd. Because if I'd gotten here a minute after, I would only have three hours of downtime before we did something. I understand this is how the business works. This is exactly how it works everywhere. At Sun of the Beach, everyone's great, great people over there. I don't mean to disrespect them at all, but this is the way it works. Here's all I'm saying, I got to adjust for that, right?

40:14 Drew Yeah.

40:15 Adam So I got to figure that out. Also, they do this too. They go, well, he gets here at 8.30, figure our makeup, our wardrobe, our miscellaneous, and then he's ready. No, no.

40:27 Drew Five minutes make up.

40:27 Adam Nine minutes make up. Minute and a half wardrobe.

40:31 Drew Yeah.

40:31 Adam It's like pow, and you're just standing around.

40:33 Drew Yeah.

40:33 Adam Okay. So I'm going to have to figure this out, Drew. Maybe I'll sleep there. Just go in the trailer and sleep. We'll figure it out. Yeah.

40:41 Caller I'm just thinking.

40:43 Adam I'm pre-miserable. This is my life. I decide-

40:47 Drew You need to find a producer.

40:48 Adam Why be miserable? Why be caught off guard being miserable tomorrow morning at 7? I'm going to be pre-miserable tonight.

40:54 Drew You need to talk to a producer, not somebody accountable to a producer.

40:58 Adam There's nobody you can talk to. They always say, this is the call time. Here's when you're slated to go. There's nobody in the right mind is going to tell you to roll in two hours later. Nobody. I'll just leave at like 8 and they'll be calling and I'll tell them to relax. I'll never do anything before 10. What's the over under for tomorrow? Call time 8.15.

41:20 Drew 10.15.

41:21 Adam 10.15? That's the over under? You want to go over or under on that bet?

41:25 Drew Over.

41:25 Adam You go over 10.15? All right. I'll play Devil's Advocate. I'll take under. 10 bucks. All right. 10.15. Debra? Yes. All right. So you're 29. Wait a minute. Okay. So psoriasis on the penis, right?

41:41 Caller Yeah. I was dating a guy for about 14 months. We had unprotected sex once. Then I found out after we broke up, I was kind of messing around with him. I'm like, what is that? He's like, it's psoriasis. I'm like, you can't have psoriasis down there.

42:00 Drew Oh, yeah, you can.

42:00 Caller Sure, you can. You can?

42:01 Drew Oh, yeah.

42:03 Caller It's just dry skin, right?

42:05 Drew Well, it's an inflammatory skin reaction. It's kind of like what arthritis is to your joints. That's what that is to your skin.

42:11 Adam Well, it is his joint.

42:13 Drew And it's the unsung exposed areas, the stuff that's in the pants. It's easier to control in sun-exposed areas.

42:21 Caller Is it common?

42:22 Drew Yes. Is it just on his penis or is it in other places?

42:25 Caller No, it's just on the tip of his penis. And to be real honest, it sounds really funny, but it's like, I guess it's where the rubber rubs up against him.

42:34 Caller Just the tip.

42:36 Drew Why is that funny?

42:38 Adam Well, it's not haha funny, but it's peculiar funny.

42:40 Drew Well, I wonder if that's just where the, maybe has a condom allergy.

42:43 Caller Yeah. See, that's what I was thinking too.

42:45 Drew Yeah. The only way they can really make a diagnosis of psoriasis is with biopsy.

42:49 Adam Well, also on psoriasis, I mean, maybe I'm nutty here, but isn't the skin on the head of your penis different than the flesh that's on the penis?

43:00 Drew Yes.

43:00 Adam And wouldn't that flesh on the penis be more the area that would get these skin disorders?

43:06 Drew Whenever I've seen psoriasis, it's been on the shaft. And it's been on people who have psoriasis everywhere.

43:10 Adam Yeah, it sounds, by the time it gets to the penis, it's gotten everywhere.

43:12 Drew Because it's usually on what's called extensor surfaces, back here, like on your elbows. Yeah, yeah.

43:16 Adam Why is that? Why on the outside of that elbow?

43:19 Drew That's just the way psoriasis is. Are you sure he doesn't mean eczema?

43:21 Caller No, he said psoriasis, and he puts a psoriasis gel on it, too, which I don't understand.

43:26 Adam Hey, Debra?

43:27 Caller Yeah.

43:27 Adam How much?

43:28 Drew Adam uses a psoriasis gel, too.

43:30 Adam Yeah, I use it on my penis, too, but it's just whatever's handy. How much time are you going to invest in your ex-boyfriend's penis?

43:37 Caller Oh, no, I'm not at all. It was a concern because I didn't know what it was.

43:41 Drew She's been calling for six months.

43:42 Adam Well, you thought that what? You got herpes or?

43:45 Caller Well, I didn't know what it was.

43:47 Drew It does not sound like anything contagious.

43:49 Adam You didn't get anything.

43:51 Caller Well, I don't know. We just broke up.

43:53 Drew No, no.

43:54 Caller Okay.

43:55 Adam Good times. Well, one, maybe it's herpes.

43:57 Caller No. Well, that thinks a lot.

43:59 Adam That doesn't go on the head either, does it?

44:00 Drew Oh, yeah, it does. It does? Yeah, but it doesn't come.

44:04 Caller It wasn't there all the time. It was there sporadically. So that's why I was kind of.

44:09 Drew Was it sort of red scaly?

44:11 Caller It wasn't scaly. It was just red and dry.

44:14 Drew Yeah.

44:17 Caller I've never heard of that. I asked my doctor, my doctor never heard of it, so I figured, okay, turn to the expert.

44:22 Drew Never heard of psoriasis on the penis?

44:23 Caller Well, he's never come across a case.

44:25 Drew Well, I've seen it, but not exclusively there.

44:28 Caller Oh, okay.

44:29 Drew And as you mentioned, it's where the rubber hits the road, so to speak. And certainly latex allergies are terribly common, so I'd be more concerned with that. And sometimes the things that treat psoriasis will also treat allergies and eczema, so.

44:41 Adam Okay. Good times, good times. Jason? Yeah? You're 16?

44:46 Caller Yeah. Whoa.

44:47 Adam I smell bogus already.

44:48 Drew Yeah, me too.

44:49 Caller You caught me off guard. I've never been on any kind of live program before.

44:54 Adam Okay.

44:57 Caller Oh, God, where do I start? See, I've been going out with this girl for like five years now.

45:02 Drew Since you were 11?

45:04 Caller Yeah, since I was 11.

45:05 Drew And since she was 11 also?

45:07 Caller Yeah.

45:08 Caller Okay.

45:09 Caller We went to school together for a great while.

45:11 Drew A great while.

45:12 Caller Okay.

45:14 Caller And over the years, we became progressively more compassionate. Eventually...

45:25 Drew Why don't we give Jason a few minutes?

45:26 Adam You can't articulate yourself any better than that.

45:29 Drew Let's give him a few minutes to organize his thoughts, shall we?

45:31 Caller Yeah, yeah.

45:31 Adam Well, I think we ought to give him all the way through puberty. Do you think a few minutes is going to help him? Hey, Jason, what's the question? Go ahead, go.

45:41 Caller I've been going out with her for like five years. Last summer, she went away to a camp, like in Pennsylvania or something. A sleep-away camp. And so, we didn't get to... We didn't really talk to each other over the summer break.

45:57 Caller Right.

45:59 Drew And?

46:00 Caller And, I'm wondering, you know, I've tried to call her repeatedly, and it doesn't seem like her parents are giving her the messages.

46:09 Drew Or maybe they are, and she just doesn't want to reconnect.

46:12 Caller Well, I doubt it because...

46:14 Adam No, you can't do that.

46:15 Caller I'm like the only person who she's ever loved in that...

46:18 Caller All right, all right, hold on.

46:20 Adam Boy, it's great, that 16-year-old mine, which is... Here's the deal. Here's that 16-year-old male mine. She said she loved me.

46:28 Drew Therefore?

46:28 Adam Or loved me. And that's it. I mean, then she will be in love with me until I am done being in love with her.

46:36 Drew Yeah.

46:36 Adam Oh, man.

46:38 Drew We gotta talk a little bit to him. We gotta straighten the guy out.

46:40 Adam Yeah, okay. We'll drop the ax when we come back.

46:46 Caller All right, guys, here's the deal.

46:47 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

46:51 Caller One call is all you need to make.

46:52 Caller Call the Dateline. 877-889-DATE.

46:55 Drew Call the Dateline.

47:39 Yo!

47:40 Drew GIO, my song, this is my song, correct? I heard this song playing when we were out with the system of Down the other night. This is what I heard.

47:46 Adam Oh, when I walked into the Armenian restaurant?

47:48 Drew Yes, I heard it. I heard the song.

47:50 Adam Bouncing in slow motion, giving the finger pull the trigger, gun thing to all the Armenian waiters.

47:57 Drew Dark Room took a couple of beats too long for you to take your sunglasses off.

48:00 Adam Yep.

48:01 Drew Oh, this is what I heard though. They heard the other song. No, wait a minute. I heard the other song, they heard this one.

48:08 Adam That's right. Alrighty. It is Loveline.

48:13 Caller I'm Adam.

48:13 Adam That's Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1.

48:18 Caller Let's hop back to the phones and speak to Jason.

48:22 Adam Now, what was Jason's deal?

48:24 Drew Jason had been dating a girl since they were 11.

48:26 Adam Oh, yeah.

48:27 Drew Now, she went away to some camp in Pennsylvania and she will not return his calls. It must be, Adam, that the parents are not giving her the message.

48:34 Caller That's right.

48:36 Adam Hey, Jason.

48:37 Caller Yeah.

48:38 Adam Well, let's just say, well, when did she get back from camp?

48:42 Caller The end of summer break.

48:47 Drew Six months ago, four months ago.

48:48 Adam How many months ago did she, when school started is when she got?

48:52 Caller When school started.

48:53 Adam So, we were past Christmas vacation now, right?

48:57 Caller Yeah. I've been trying to call since this problem occurred.

49:00 Drew The problem?

49:02 Caller Yeah, since, you know.

49:04 Drew And she never gave you any breakup or note or anything?

49:07 Adam Well, here would be my question. Let's just say, hypothetically, that the parents weren't passing along the message that you called.

49:15 Caller Yeah.

49:16 Adam Wouldn't she call you?

49:18 Caller Um, no, because she's like ADHD, which is like attention deficit hyper disorder.

49:26 Adam She forgot she had a boyfriend or?

49:28 Caller No, she probably just spaced out on him.

49:30 Adam I mean, she goes to dial and then gets distracted.

49:33 Caller Probably.

49:33 Drew No, Jason, think, use your brain for a second here, buddy. Why, if she were your girlfriend, why wouldn't she call you?

49:40 Adam H-D-A-C. H-V-A-C. That's the heating, heating area. Why, why wouldn't she, didn't she call you before?

49:50 Caller No, she didn't call me. Last time she called me was before she went to, um.

49:54 Drew Jason Depp.

49:54 Adam I know, when you guys were together. I mean, when she was your girlfriend before, didn't she call you?

50:00 Caller No, I called her all the time.

50:01 Drew She never called you. Never.

50:05 Caller One time to reply to plans that I had.

50:08 Adam In the, in, in, you want, in the five years. Five years of dating her, she never called you.

50:13 Caller Yeah, it was off and on. It was like really weird. It's hard to describe. We probably went on like one date a year at average.

50:21 Adam For five years.

50:22 Caller Yeah. I know.

50:23 It's really pathetic.

50:24 Caller I, I just get really caught up in my schoolwork. So it's hard to tell.

50:29 Adam Hold on a second.

50:32 Caller The Earth to Jason.

50:34 Adam Boy, he is, he's orbiting Saturn at this point. It started off with his girlfriend of five years. And that's sort of deteriorated to, they'd went out on approximately a date a year. And she was mostly because he got pretty caught up in his schoolwork. You know how it is, Drew. You're dating somebody. You get.

50:57 Drew Well, I don't come home for Jason.

50:58 Adam You have a trig exam and eight months goes by without making a call. Now we're, now, Drew, before you were confused, you thought, hey, this girl dated this guy for five years, went away to camp and never broke it off.

51:13 Caller Right.

51:13 Adam That seems weird.

51:14 Drew Now, I think if we were to talk to her, there's nothing to break off.

51:18 Caller Right.

51:21 Adam Jason.

51:22 Caller Yeah.

51:24 Adam Have you ever had sex with her?

51:26 Caller We've done. Not really.

51:28 Drew Have you just made out with her?

51:29 Caller We've gotten basically like four players or something.

51:32 Drew You mean making out.

51:33 Adam Kissing.

51:34 Caller Making out.

51:36 Adam Grabbed a little outside sweater boob.

51:40 Drew No, not even that.

51:42 Caller Exploration, yeah.

51:43 Drew Yeah.

51:45 Adam You never got any OSB? Outside sweater boob? Or oriented strand board depending on where you are?

51:53 Caller Oh, well, it's not like we haven't seen each other naked. That's, we've done that.

52:00 Adam Right. You've closed your eyes and seen her naked?

52:02 Caller No, like open eyes, like exploratory.

52:06 Adam Exploratory?

52:07 Caller Yeah.

52:08 Adam OK. So, but anyway, here we are after Christmas break.

52:14 Caller Yeah.

52:14 Adam And the last time you spoke to her was before she went away to camp in the middle of the summer?

52:21 Caller Yeah.

52:21 Drew When was the last time you had a date with her?

52:24 Caller Prom last year.

52:25 Drew Prom last year.

52:27 Caller Yeah.

52:27 Drew So nearly a year ago.

52:28 Caller Yeah. So nearly a year ago.

52:30 Caller Yeah.

52:31 Drew That's not exactly a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship.

52:34 Caller I know. It's very weird.

52:36 Drew No.

52:36 Adam That's not that weird.

52:37 Drew It's just not what you think it is.

52:39 Adam Yeah.

52:39 Drew It's just not what you think it is.

52:41 Adam The weird part is you calling her your girlfriend.

52:44 Caller Well, that's basically what she is because I don't know how to describe it other than because every time I call her she gets like all energetic and happy and all of a sudden.

52:57 Drew That doesn't make her a girlfriend.

52:58 Caller I know that.

53:01 Adam She doesn't pick up the phone anymore, does she?

53:04 Caller I don't know.

53:06 Adam Well, when's the last time you called her and she answered the phone?

53:10 Caller Last year. Well usually it's her parents saying she's not home or she's busy.

53:17 Adam You say last year, but we're barely into this year. So how many months ago?

53:22 Caller Like last school year.

53:24 Drew Like eight months ago.

53:25 Adam You mean like May or June? Yeah. All right. Hold on a second. Drew, by the way, when you're 16, tell me, everyone, think about this.

53:40 Drew In 16-year-old years?

53:41 Adam When you're in the 10th grade and you spoke to somebody before summer break, let's say mid-May of your 10th grade year, and now you're in the 11th grade and you're past Christmas vacation, that's a lifetime, isn't it?

53:58 Drew It's a new life has come around, yeah, absolutely.

54:01 Caller Yeah.

54:02 Adam Jason. Yeah. She's not your girlfriend.

54:06 Caller Well, actually, to let you know, just I'm in 10th grade.

54:10 Adam Okay. Okay. But she's not your girlfriend.

54:13 Caller Okay. Then why do I call her?

54:15 Adam Then what?

54:15 Drew Somebody you had a couple dates with.

54:17 Caller Oh.

54:17 Adam Okay. Let's just call her the best you could say she's your ex-girlfriend.

54:22 Caller Yeah.

54:23 Adam And even that's stretching the truth just a little bit.

54:27 Caller She's very emotional. So I'm trying to figure out how to break it to her nicely that we're pretty much over because she's kind of like a child.

54:35 Adam Yeah. Listen. Listen.

54:37 Caller Yeah. I was saying this is over. I don't know exactly how to break it to her without a broken process.

54:41 Adam Jason, let me tell you something. You break up with her and her world is coming apart.

54:46 Caller I know. This is a problem.

54:47 Adam Yeah. It's tough when you got to let a kid down that way. Well, I'll be her.

54:55 Caller All right?

54:57 Drew No. I don't know what's going on. That's bad.

55:01 Adam Jason, do you think you'll even talk to her again? How are you going to break up with her?

55:06 Caller I was thinking about saying her a letter.

55:08 Drew Okay. Okay.

55:09 Adam Do that. Write her a letter.

55:11 Caller She's been very, very dysgraphic.

55:16 Adam Oh, you can't write?

55:17 Caller Right.

55:18 Adam Well, do you have an assistant?

55:21 Caller No, I stopped being my assistant a while ago.

55:23 Adam Okay. Well, I'd say wait for her to call you.

55:28 Drew No, no, no.

55:28 Adam No, don't wait, but move on.

55:31 Drew Move on. There you go.

55:32 Adam How about get another girlfriend, buddy?

55:35 Caller All right.

55:35 Adam Yeah, you're a successful guy. You're 16 years old. You're going to school, right?

55:40 Caller Yeah, I'm going to school. I'm going to school with 70 kids.

55:44 Adam She doesn't go to your school?

55:45 Caller No.

55:46 Adam Okay, you find somebody at school.

55:49 Caller Yeah.

55:50 Adam Yeah, that's okay.

55:51 Caller I'm sure I'll be familiar with the fraud.

55:53 Caller Okay. All right.

55:56 Adam Because listen, if he dumps her, she could try something stupid. You know what I mean? He drops that bomb on her. Her world comes apart. Next thing you know, she's in the tub, puddle of blood, water running, paramedics rushing in, but it's too late. You don't toy with someone like that. You know what I mean? She might not be able to handle Jason dropping that kind of bomb.

56:22 Drew It's been such a lengthy, passionate affair.

56:25 Adam It's tough. It's tough when you got to let him go that way.

56:29 Drew Hey, Matt, 25.

56:30 Caller Hey, how's it going?

56:31 Drew Wait a minute, man.

56:33 Adam How's that conversation going? Hey, baby, I'm sorry and don't try to argue with me. I got to cut you loose. Who is this? Jason.

56:43 Caller Who?

56:44 Adam Jason? Oh, from Sleepaway Camp? No. I don't know. Let me check my yearbook. Well, anyway, while you're checking, I got to dump you. I want you to know that I'm going to start seeing other people, too. And I suggest you, tough as it may, you get back on that horse, too. You got to live again, baby.

57:10 Drew All right, Matt.

57:11 Caller Hey, how's it going?

57:11 Caller Good.

57:13 Caller Hey, I've been listening to you guys forever. Like, the first time I listened was when Poor Man was with you guys.

57:19 Drew Ooh, forever.

57:20 Caller Oh, first call I ever heard was some guy thinking he'd make his penis longer by hanging a sledgehammer from it.

57:29 Adam What's happening there, Matt?

57:33 Caller Well, some time ago, my girlfriend was just doing the thing, making the wrap, you know.

57:43 Drew Making the wrap.

57:45 Adam Yeah.

57:45 Caller She claims that she has no clitoris.

57:51 Drew No, not unless somebody cut it off, but what does...

57:54 Caller Cut it off.

57:55 Drew There is such a thing as that.

57:56 Caller Okay, I've never experienced that, you know.

57:59 Drew Somebody cut her clitoris off?

58:00 Adam No, he's never experienced it, no clitoris.

58:02 Caller Yeah, I mean.

58:04 Adam Maybe it's just a convenient excuse for not orgasming.

58:06 Drew Right.

58:07 Caller Well, we haven't had sex or anything.

58:09 Adam Oh, okay.

58:10 Caller I haven't gone down there with my hands yet, or anything, you know.

58:13 Adam She gave you this talk before you even went down there, huh?

58:17 Caller Basically, maybe she's just, like, scared to do anything, you know.

58:21 Adam It's interesting.

58:23 Drew Where did she say it went?

58:25 Caller Where did she say what went?

58:27 Adam Her clitoris.

58:28 Caller She just said she didn't have one.

58:30 Adam Sleep away camp.

58:31 Drew Sleep away camp. No, there's no such thing as... Why?

58:35 Adam Could one not be born without a clitoris?

58:37 Drew I've never heard of that.

58:38 Caller That's what I was thinking.

58:39 Adam Okay. Well, she told you this. Well, that's kind of nice. Takes the pressure off. You go in loose.

58:43 Drew No, she means that she can't have an orgasm. That's what she means.

58:47 Caller Probably.

58:48 Drew Yeah.

58:48 Adam How old is she?

58:50 Caller She's 21.

58:51 Adam Okay. And why did she bring this up, you think? She was just giving you a little heads up? So to speak.

58:57 Caller Probably. Yeah. Just, maybe she was just scared and Okay. Maybe she was curious. Maybe if I went down there, maybe I got surprised or something.

59:07 Adam Yeah. She even wants your head to explode, searching for a clitoris that never existed.

59:11 Caller I mean, with, because she's probably a virgin.

59:14 Adam Ah, probably, right.

59:17 Caller Well, she hasn't told me if she's done it or not.

59:19 Drew Maybe she doesn't even know what she's talking about. I think that's more likely the case.

59:24 Caller Really?

59:24 Adam Tim? I mean, Matt, is she pretty stupid?

59:28 Caller No.

59:28 Drew Inexperienced?

59:30 Caller Inexperienced.

59:31 Adam Okay. Where did you meet her?

59:33 Caller At a party.

59:34 Adam Okay. What'd she do?

59:36 Caller What'd she do?

59:37 Drew What does she do?

59:38 Caller Oh, what does she do? She just works and goes to school.

59:41 Adam Okay.

59:42 Drew What does she do for work?

59:44 Caller She just works at like a target or something, stalking and stuff like that.

59:49 Caller Okay.

59:49 Adam How long you two been going out?

59:53 Caller About two years.

59:55 Caller All right.

59:56 Caller Yeah.

59:57 Caller Wait a minute.

59:57 Drew Two years.

59:58 Caller Wait a minute.

1:00:00 Caller Hold on a second.

1:00:02 Adam He's a little unclear about many things in her life.

1:00:05 Caller Oh my God.

1:00:05 Drew Two years.

1:00:06 Adam You thought if he'd said two weeks, you'd been all right with him. If he said two months, you'd be like, holy crap. Two years.

1:00:16 Drew I didn't even hear it. It took a beat.

1:00:17 Adam Didn't register.

1:00:18 Drew Yeah.

1:00:18 Adam Yeah.

1:00:19 Caller Religious kind of, you know, and she just doesn't go there. Right. So it's kind of, I just didn't want to push the issue.

1:00:29 Adam And Matt, but what would you say her strongest attributes are as a person? What's good about her?

1:00:39 Caller What's good about her? When she knows?

1:00:44 Caller I just want to see if we can step in and see and check it out.

1:00:49 Caller You know, she sets goals and she does what she can to achieve them.

1:00:53 Adam What's what are some of her latest goals?

1:00:59 Drew Um, you're bad.

1:01:06 Caller Trying to figure out what she wants to do as a major and stuff.

1:01:11 Adam And who would you say some of her greatest influences would be spiritually, emotionally or celebrities even?

1:01:19 Caller Probably her parents.

1:01:23 Drew Parents?

1:01:25 Adam Oh, that's it? Okay. Alright, so she's a religious person?

1:01:29 Caller Kind of, yeah.

1:01:29 Adam Okay.

1:01:30 Drew Kind of.

1:01:31 Adam Alright, so no clitoris, and what's the farthest you've gotten with her in two years?

1:01:38 Caller Just, like, feeling her breast and stuff like that.

1:01:42 Adam You're a 25-year-old guy. You're going to wait till you get married?

1:01:46 Caller Pretty much. I mean, I've already... I'm not a virgin or anything, but I've just kind of made choices in my life. Changing around and stuff.

1:01:56 Adam You used to be a junkie or something? You killed somebody?

1:02:00 Caller What happened? No, I didn't kill nobody.

1:02:04 Adam What do you do? Something with stucco?

1:02:06 Caller No.

1:02:08 Adam What do you do for a living?

1:02:11 Caller Right now, I'm just working for the church and stuff.

1:02:14 Adam You're gay. Well, one day, you'll find out whether she has said clitoris or not.

1:02:24 Drew No, it's good. Some people share values in common, and she has gone on about her anatomy, but you have no way of knowing what the reality is there until it comes time that you find out. It will not be that she has no clitoris. Though she may well have orgasmic problems.

1:02:38 Adam The kiss of death for careers is the right now. The preface is the what I'm doing.

1:02:43 Drew Oh, yeah. Right now, I'm killing the blood.

1:02:45 Adam Ask me what I'm doing.

1:02:46 Drew What do you do for a living right now, Adam?

1:02:49 Adam You're such a retard. You have to actually work the right now. You have to work the right now.

1:02:54 Drew What do you do for a living, Adam?

1:02:55 Adam Oh, screw you. You don't know what you're doing. You have to have to work right now.

1:02:58 Drew I didn't hear that I did that. It's funny. That's the comedy.

1:03:04 Adam He's unusable, this Drew. He's completely unusable. You can't even be recycled, Drew. I have to put you in a Cuisinart and pour you into another mold of another human. All right. Are you mad yet? There's even no role playing with you. You're worse than our callers. Josh?

1:03:26 Yes.

1:03:26 Adam Ask me what I'm doing.

1:03:29 What are you doing?

1:03:31 Adam Right now, that's where you just run. You run. If you're on a date with someone, you ask them what they're doing and you hear them say, right, just start running.

1:03:39 Drew Usually, it doesn't start with well, right, then you're out.

1:03:43 Adam Right. That's me. Sorry. Well, right now, you know what's another bad one? Currently. You got to run when you hear currently too. Well, currently.

1:03:54 Drew Isn't there also, when people seem to also, when they say, I'm working and going to school.

1:04:00 Adam That's always bad too.

1:04:01 Drew Yeah.

1:04:02 Adam Sounds ambitious.

1:04:03 Drew Because when they're going to school and working, to pay for school, they tell you they're going to school.

1:04:10 Adam Yes.

1:04:10 Drew They're just going to school.

1:04:11 Adam Going to school is worse than working. And working three jobs is worse than working one job. I haven't really figured it out, but that's the way it seems to work. So Josh.

1:04:21 Yeah.

1:04:21 Adam What's up right now?

1:04:23 All right. Well, okay. I'm 19 and everything. I've had this girlfriend for about the last three and a half years that we started pretty early and everything. And we got sexually active pretty quick. And it was a really good relationship. And but just we kind of had our problems toward the end, you know, like an off and on thing.

1:04:39 Drew And what were the problems?

1:04:40 Well, just like she started, you know, this kind of I don't know what you would call. I would OK. I would just call it being pretty much a slut. And she started going off just like just to play a couple of times. And I mean, I did my share of it, too. But just go on and she didn't really sleep with the other guys. But, you know, they just happened to find their way down her pants and everything. But I guess we kind of broke up and everything. And it's been a while and we really stayed out of contact for about a couple months. But and I met this really nice girl, actually. And she's just great and she's a virgin and everything. And it's just I really find myself wanting to spend time with her a lot. And we do. And she's just a great girl. And I, but, you know, lately it's just like I'm kind of back in town. I was away for a while and I just find myself back with my ex- girlfriend every, you know, a couple of times a week.

1:05:32 Drew Where is this great girl that you have a new relationship with?

1:05:35 Well, she's here in my hometown where I was. I went away for a while for some training.

1:05:40 Drew And, Est?

1:05:42 Caller The military, that's what I figured.

1:05:44 Yeah, that's what it is.

1:05:49 Adam And are you a boyfriend and girlfriend with the virgin girl?

1:05:53 No, she's, right now we're just friends, but it's like there's potential. It's just kind of in that early-stage relationship thing.

1:06:01 Adam Well, why don't you ask her out?

1:06:04 That's probably going to happen one of these days. I mean, it is going to happen. It's just that, like, right now, I don't feel like I should because it's just, I feel like I'm still being this kind of, like, asshole guy that's still getting with his, you know.

1:06:17 Drew How often do you get together with the old girlfriend?

1:06:18 Adam Twice a week.

1:06:20 Drew Did you say that?

1:06:21 Yeah, I would go with that, you know, just probably a good twice a week.

1:06:24 Drew You are an asshole. And what does your ex-girlfriend think is going on?

1:06:28 She's pretty much okay with it, actually.

1:06:30 Drew Oh, no. What does she think? Does she think you guys are getting back together?

1:06:34 She's all on this cake like, she wants, she's still a senior this year, and she's still on this thing like where she wants to, after all this, after being boyfriend-girlfriend all this time, and now she just wants to kind of, and after we finally broke up because of all this, she just wants to have some time alone to, you know, just figure out what she wants.

1:06:55 Drew All right, listen, this is sort of a not, this is certainly not a loveline caliber problem. You know what I'm saying?

1:07:02 Adam Yeah.

1:07:02 Drew It seems to me Josh, the well-put-together guy, is capable of having really good relationships, he picks good people, he has found another good one, he's just having trouble giving up the sex from the other one, he's not hurting her because it sounds like it's consensual, she too is sort of addictively involved with him, and she wants to get on and start meeting other people. You have, it's just like stopping smoking or anything else, you just gotta stop and get focused on this new relationship, and it won't be as sort of gratifying because you're not gonna have the physical element in there that you've got with the old relationship, but you're a smart guy, you know what a good relationship is, you're gonna have to commit to that and go down and focus on that for a little while.

1:07:36 Caller All right. Right?

1:07:37 Adam Time to grow up. Well, listen.

1:07:39 Drew It sounds like he's got his best together.

1:07:41 Adam He seems like a decent guy, and you can focus, and you can change, and if you want to be a good boyfriend, and you want to be faithful and all that sort of stuff, then you can do that.

1:07:50 Drew He doesn't even have to do that because he doesn't have another girlfriend yet, and he's not hurting the old girlfriend because she wants to kind of end it too.

1:07:57 Adam But he's saying he wants to start up with this version.

1:08:00 Drew And he should. Right. Right.

1:08:01 Adam He should. And he's not sure he's ready to rise to that challenge. Jenny?

1:08:07 Drew Yeah?

1:08:08 Adam You've slept with seven. Hold on. What happened? She slept with seven of her friends, boyfriends?

1:08:16 Drew Is that right? Yeah.

1:08:17 Caller Right.

1:08:19 Adam Seven of your friends' boyfriends? Wow. You stinking whore. That must be every one of your friends, right?

1:08:28 Caller No.

1:08:29 Adam You have eight friends? There's one that's still not checked off the list?

1:08:33 Drew Those are ex-friends.

1:08:34 Caller Yeah. Actually, yeah, I do leave a lot of my friends that way.

1:08:38 Adam So you have had sex with seven of these of your friends' boyfriends?

1:08:43 Caller Yeah.

1:08:43 Adam Wow. And they all go for it, huh?

1:08:46 Caller Yeah.

1:08:48 Caller I think that might be why I do it. I don't know.

1:08:51 Adam Because they're willing to have sex with you?

1:08:53 Caller Yeah.

1:08:53 Adam Okay.

1:08:54 Caller The fact that I can pull them away from me.

1:08:55 Adam What's the question? You want to stop doing this?

1:08:58 Caller Yeah. I'm just wondering why I do that.

1:09:02 Adam There's probably a whole bunch of reasons. We'll get into them. We got to take a little break. Then we'll get back and we'll pick you apart and we'll put you back together, but only halfway.

1:09:11 Caller Okay.

1:09:12 Adam Not quite in the right order. There will be some pieces missing. Okay?

1:09:16 Caller Okay.

1:09:16 Adam All right, Jenny. Hang on. All right. We'll be right back with Jenny after this.

1:09:23 Loveline will be right back. So get your problems ready. Ready.

1:10:02 Adam What are they on here? We're on the air. Sorry. Because you're yelling at Drew about how delusional people are. Hey, what's going on? Loveline. Adam, that's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number. You don't need that number. It's only going to make you want to call. All right. Now, when we left off, we're speaking to Jenny. Jenny is 16. She slept with seven of her girlfriend's boyfriends, and she wants to stop before she screws again. Jenny?

1:10:32 Drew Yes? Do you want to stop?

1:10:33 Caller Yeah.

1:10:35 Adam Yeah? What happened to you, baby? Where's daddy?

1:10:38 Caller His dad, well, he had lung cancer about two years ago, and he died.

1:10:43 Caller Yeah. I think this is more pissed off at mom.

1:10:47 Drew This is definitely dad's not there.

1:10:48 Adam What's mom doing? Are you mad at mom?

1:10:51 Caller No. She got remarried.

1:10:53 Drew There we go. So soon? Yeah. How long after dad passed did she get remarried?

1:10:58 Caller Well, they had been divorced a couple of years before that.

1:11:01 Adam Okay. How do you like stepdad?

1:11:04 Caller Not so much.

1:11:07 Adam Is there a stepdad alive who any, put it this way.

1:11:11 Drew The opposite side.

1:11:11 Adam Is there a teenage daughter?

1:11:13 Drew Yes.

1:11:13 Adam Now, it'll happen with males once in a while. Is there a teenage daughter who likes her stepdad?

1:11:18 Drew No.

1:11:20 Adam I don't think that man's been born.

1:11:21 Caller No.

1:11:22 Drew Well, unless he was with her since he was like two.

1:11:25 Adam Right.

1:11:26 Drew Then occasionally.

1:11:27 Adam Okay. So, then, what's bad about stepdad?

1:11:32 Caller Well, he's just kind of an ass, but I don't only think it has much to do with him, because this all started before they got married, before my mom even met him.

1:11:41 Adam Okay.

1:11:42 Drew So, how long have you been at this?

1:11:43 Caller Huh?

1:11:44 Drew How long have you been at this?

1:11:46 Caller Since the end of my freshman year.

1:11:48 Drew So, since you were 14.

1:11:49 Adam Yeah. And anything bad happened to you growing up?

1:11:54 Caller I don't know. I think so.

1:11:56 Adam Nothing we need to know about?

1:11:58 Caller I don't remember.

1:11:59 Adam Was your dad a good guy before he passed away?

1:12:01 Caller Yeah.

1:12:02 Drew Did anybody suggest that maybe anything happened to you?

1:12:05 Caller No.

1:12:06 Caller Hmm.

1:12:06 Adam When did you lose your virginity?

1:12:08 Caller When I was 14.

1:12:10 Caller All right.

1:12:11 Adam Do you ever have a boyfriend yourself?

1:12:13 Caller Yeah.

1:12:14 Adam What happens with those relationships?

1:12:17 Caller I just get bored with them. No fun.

1:12:20 Adam Hmm.

1:12:21 Drew Not arousing enough.

1:12:22 Caller Yeah.

1:12:23 Adam Hmm. Are you good looking?

1:12:26 Caller Well, not if I'm stuck up, but yeah.

1:12:29 Adam Yeah. So you kind of know that guys like you?

1:12:33 Caller Yeah.

1:12:34 Adam Okay. And you sort of take advantage of it?

1:12:39 Caller I guess.

1:12:39 Adam But also you must hang around with idiots too.

1:12:42 Caller Why?

1:12:43 Adam Well, I mean these guys that are screwing their girlfriend's friend. These aren't great guys. Did you ever fall in love with any of these guys?

1:12:54 Caller No.

1:12:55 Adam Not interested, huh?

1:12:56 Drew Were you just interested in hurting your girlfriends?

1:12:59 Caller No.

1:12:59 Caller Not at all.

1:13:00 Drew Well, you're not in love with these guys. You don't like these guys and you don't want to hurt your girlfriend. So what's the point here?

1:13:06 Adam Why are you sleeping with them?

1:13:08 Caller Why am I? I don't know. I think probably just the fact that I can get them to cheat on their girlfriends.

1:13:17 Drew But I think you didn't want to hurt your girlfriends.

1:13:19 Caller Huh?

1:13:20 Drew I think you didn't want to hurt your girlfriends.

1:13:21 Caller Well, not my girlfriends, but just the fact that a guy would do that, you know. Leave her for me.

1:13:26 Drew But aren't you concerned that you're going to hurt your girlfriends?

1:13:29 Yeah.

1:13:30 Drew But that's not as important as sort of the triumph.

1:13:34 Caller Well, it is. That's why I want to stop.

1:13:36 Adam Well, why don't you just stop? I mean, you're being a bad person. Can you stop doing that? You can't control yourself to that point?

1:13:45 Caller I probably could if I was like sober all the time.

1:13:48 Drew Yeah, I was going to say, this is this is, addicts do this kind of thing.

1:13:50 Adam Do you have, to me too, it sounds like a self-esteem issue.

1:13:54 Drew Well, it's an emptiness issue. She is really empty and then drugs and alcohol, what she did in the fill and then she fills with people.

1:14:04 Adam Why do you think you're so empty? You didn't feel good growing up? You didn't feel good about yourself?

1:14:11 Drew I'm not very nice. What kind of relationship would you like to have with a guy?

1:14:17 Caller I don't like guys that are overly nice.

1:14:20 Drew Right, you have to have a bad guy, right?

1:14:22 Caller Yeah.

1:14:22 Adam Are you sure your dad wasn't an a-hole?

1:14:27 Caller He could have been sometimes, I don't remember that much though. I haven't lived with him since I was in kindergarten.

1:14:33 Adam So he just kind of abandoned the family?

1:14:36 Caller No, my mom left him.

1:14:38 Drew Why?

1:14:40 Caller I think he was an alcohol-

1:14:42 Caller Where's my bourbon?

1:14:43 Drew There we go. And so you're going down that path too now, huh?

1:14:47 I hope not.

1:14:48 Drew Well, doesn't seem like it.

1:14:48 Adam Well, it seems like it. Okay, so how about you start with the-

1:14:52 Drew Jenny.

1:14:53 Adam What if she stops the booze?

1:14:57 Drew She stops, the big thing with her, yes, her disease is activating, yes, she's got momentum with substances, yes, a lot of these behaviors are when she's on drugs or alcohol. But the big issue here is that abandonment, that emptiness, and she's got to fill that void. She's got to be able to have relationships with real people without sabotaging them, without getting bored, and it may not be possible.

1:15:18 Adam Well, as long as she's hot-looking, it may not be possible without- She's got to fatten up.

1:15:22 Drew It may not be possible without therapy. That's right. That becomes her liability now. Because there's that gratification, she can always go for that and fill that void in that moment, get that arousal and pow, that she feels triumphant in the moment, and then crap you about herself immediately following. It's the shame that she's carrying around with her that needs to be dealt with.

1:15:40 Adam Yeah.

1:15:41 Drew That's an awful, awful life to be living in.

1:15:44 Adam Okay. So stop the booze and keep the legs together. Thank you. Sandra?

1:15:51 Drew An aspirin between the legs, that's the answer. But listen, if you can, Jenny, if you want, if you're motivated, a 12-step recovery program would help you with this.

1:15:59 Adam All right. Sandra?

1:16:00 Hello?

1:16:01 Adam Sandra?

1:16:02 Yes?

1:16:03 Adam You're 20, what's up?

1:16:04 Caller Okay. I just have a question. Okay. I got a shot from Planned Parenthood, which is Deepo Vera. Okay. Me and my boyfriend had sex, and then he came inside. So I had called him to ask him if I needed to get the morning after pill, and the lady had told me I did, but I thought that the shot works as soon as I get it. So my question is, do I need the morning after pill or not?

1:16:26 Drew How long after the shot did you have the intercourse?

1:16:28 Caller Six days after.

1:16:30 Drew I think you should be pretty good shape there.

1:16:33 Adam Somebody told me recently about a family member who got a depot shot and had sex and got pregnant.

1:16:42 Drew In the first week?

1:16:43 Adam Yeah.

1:16:45 Drew I was just thinking, it might be a safeguard against that. Boy, boy, it's a lot of hormone. I think, well, what did they say?

1:16:55 Adam Playing parenthood?

1:16:57 Caller Okay, I had got it and I asked the lady, how long does it take for it to work? And she said, technically, it works as soon as you get the shot.

1:17:04 Drew But I think there is some added risk up to about a week, if I remember right. Did she tell you that too?

1:17:12 Adam Did she want you to take the morning after pill?

1:17:14 Caller No. The lady that I talked to was one of the people that answered the phone.

1:17:18 Drew Right.

1:17:19 Caller And she put me on hold and she said, yeah, you need to take the morning after pill.

1:17:23 Drew I think in that first week it might be a reasonable...

1:17:25 Adam Did she want you to take the morning after pill?

1:17:27 Caller Yeah. So I just called to make sure if I should or shouldn't.

1:17:30 Drew I think it would be a reasonable safeguard to do that in that first week.

1:17:33 Caller Yeah.

1:17:33 Adam If you called the place that gave you the depot shot, explain to them the circumstances and they said, yes, you should do this. And I would say, yes, you should do it.

1:17:42 Caller Yeah. But then my problem is I went yesterday to go get it. I mean, on Saturday, they said they don't give it out until Tuesday. And I need it by tomorrow. And so I don't know what I'm going to do. Because I feel like the place gives it to me free.

1:17:56 Adam What do you mean they don't give it out until Tuesday?

1:17:57 Caller Because I had went Saturday and I had said I need the, because I had called the number and they said, oh, just go in, just as a walk-in or just you don't need an appointment. I went to one and they said, oh, we don't give them out or something. And they said, oh, we're only open till the afternoon. And then after I had remembered that I went on like the week before and they said that they don't accept walk-ins until before one. So if I were to go after one, how am I supposed to get it?

1:18:25 Drew After one on Monday.

1:18:27 Caller Yeah. They're like, well, we don't accept walk-ins until before one.

1:18:29 Drew And you need it in the morning?

1:18:31 Caller Yeah.

1:18:31 Drew And I can't go in the morning. Try the Pasadena Planned Parenthood.

1:18:35 Caller Okay.

1:18:35 Drew Okay.

1:18:37 Adam Is walk-in a slang for some national, like Mexican or black?

1:18:41 Drew And it's probably not that big a deal.

1:18:42 Adam Oh, those are people just come in?

1:18:44 Drew I bet you're covered, yes. Just walk-in.

1:18:45 Adam Interesting.

1:18:46 Drew I bet you're covered. And listen, in Los Angeles now, you can get this without a prescription.

1:18:51 Adam I thought walk-in might be for Koreans. It's goddamn walk-ins.

1:18:54 Drew Look, I'm every day trying to work out a thing where we can set up a protocol. Just a group of physicians have set up a protocol. The pharmacist can sign up to anytime they want and we can refer kids to that 24-7.

1:19:06 Adam I see.

1:19:06 Drew So work on that.

1:19:08 Adam All right. Well, you keep going. Meanwhile, everyone's getting pregnant. What are you doing with all those condoms? You sell to friends? No, I'm a whore. Don't I know you? That's when Drew used to go to Chinatown to buy condoms, everybody. What year would that be, Drew?

1:19:33 Drew Yeah. Yeah.

1:19:34 Adam 1976?

1:19:35 Drew Yeah.

1:19:36 Adam Oh, what did your hair look like?

1:19:39 Drew Well, Leif Garrett. Was that his name?

1:19:41 Adam Leif.

1:19:41 Drew Leif Garrett?

1:19:42 Adam Not Leif. Leif. Yeah. So 1976. Drew would go to Chinatown to buy his condoms because he had a steady girlfriend. He didn't want to get her pregnant. He was smart. He was Drew. But he's a passionate, passionate man. And he couldn't go to any of the pharmacies in his hometown of Pasadena because his dad was a doctor. They would have ratted him out. And they didn't sell him at the 7-11's or the liquor stores.

1:20:07 Drew They didn't sell him. Back then, you had to get the pharmacist.

1:20:09 Adam You had to go get the pharmacist. You had to go to the very back of the place and go get that old man.

1:20:15 Drew Line up the old lady.

1:20:15 Caller Aren't you the Pinsky boy?

1:20:19 Adam Oh, yeah. I bake some muffins. I like you to give them to your mother. Now what do you want, son?

1:20:26 Drew Pen. Comb.

1:20:30 Adam Do you have mints?

1:20:35 Drew Try to get something bad in there so they do the misdirection.

1:20:38 Adam Give me some cow pet pay, Anima Kiss.

1:20:39 Drew You have any chemo-therapyations here?

1:20:41 Adam And Kiss condoms. And Drew would have to buy him bulk because he couldn't schlep down to Chinatown every weekend to go grab a few condoms. You'd buy what, 20 at a time? 40?

1:20:55 Drew 20 what?

1:20:56 Adam How many condoms would you buy at a time when you went down to Chinatown? I don't know. What do they come in, a brick? What is a lot of condoms?

1:21:04 Drew With a fuse at the end.

1:21:06 Adam You light them off. But see, Smarrie would go down to Chinatown. He knew all the round eyes looked alike. I mean, listen, they look alike to us. We got to look alike to them. And they know none of those guys, those guys have got chickens hanging up in the window and stuff and, you know, they've got like roots everywhere. Those guys, none of them talk to your dad.

1:21:29 Drew No.

1:21:30 Adam So you just go in there and get your own, get your condoms. Was it the same place? You had the same guy?

1:21:36 Drew The insanity is that the barrier was so high for kids to get that stuff. I mean, it was like, tall order.

1:21:42 Adam Yeah, it wasn't easy.

1:21:43 Drew Tall order.

1:21:44 Adam They ever, they give you any crab?

1:21:46 Drew Oh yeah.

1:21:47 Adam They did the Chinese guys?

1:21:48 Drew Oh, wherever.

1:21:49 Adam Where are you going, horny? I see you here. I see you here last month. You buy brick. What you got, brothel? How many penis you have, ten? Holy smoke. You passionate, passionate man. You take, you not come back. You back for business. You spook local. You blondie. Look like life get. Dr. Drew with a big fresh case of condoms speeding back to Pasadena to have sex with his girlfriend at 16. Oh yeah. Where did you keep those things? Did you keep them hidden somewhere in the car? Must have kept them in the trunk of the car or something.

1:22:34 Drew Under the car.

1:22:37 Adam Wait a minute. You Pinsky boy. I know your father. When did he hear about this? He gonna be very interested to hear how many condoms you buy. You gonna buy some fireworks too? How about ginseng root? How about a finger trap? A connect finger. Very funny. Mary?

1:23:01 Yeah.

1:23:02 Adam You're 18?

1:23:02 Caller Yeah.

1:23:03 Caller What's up?

1:23:04 Caller Well, since last summer, I've hooked up with about 7 or 8 guys. And I was wondering if you think it's emotionally unhealthy to hook up with guys for physical gratification without having a real relationship because...

1:23:18 Drew What does hooking up mean? It's always a vague term.

1:23:22 Caller Everything except for sex.

1:23:25 Drew 7 or 8 guys. Where do you meet these guys?

1:23:29 Caller Well, a couple of guys like in Tijuana because I go to UCSD. So it's pretty close.

1:23:34 Drew Where these... So you're in college and this is your freshman year and you're just hooking up all over the place?

1:23:40 Caller Yeah, and this is like...

1:23:41 Drew You'll grow out of this.

1:23:43 Caller That's what my therapist says. I don't think that that's what's going on.

1:23:48 Drew Well, you think you're trying to get... You're up to something?

1:23:50 Caller Yeah.

1:23:51 Adam Do these guys go to UCSD and you hook up with them in TJ or are these locals?

1:23:58 Caller I don't know.

1:23:58 Adam What do you mean you don't know?

1:24:01 Caller I don't talk to them.

1:24:03 Drew At all?

1:24:04 Caller Not really.

1:24:05 Adam You don't know the language? You know what language they speak?

1:24:08 Caller English, yeah. They're American guys.

1:24:10 Drew Do they seem like college kids?

1:24:11 Caller Yeah, they're all college kids.

1:24:13 Drew At UCSD?

1:24:14 Caller No, like kids from San Diego colleges.

1:24:17 Drew One of the colleges nearby. And you hook up, you sort of mess around with them, and then you go on about your business?

1:24:23 Caller Yeah.

1:24:24 Adam Where do you mess around with them?

1:24:28 Caller Well, like if it's a party at a house or...

1:24:30 Adam No, like in TJ?

1:24:32 Caller Yeah, in the club, whatever.

1:24:35 Adam How much action can you get on a dance floor? You make out.

1:24:42 Caller Yeah, well, sometimes it's in TJ, but like sometimes I'll meet a guy somewhere else.

1:24:47 Drew Are you depressed?

1:24:49 Caller Um, I've had a lot of problems, like all through high school I was really depressed. I'd never had any friends or talked to anybody.

1:24:55 Drew And now you're seeing a therapist?

1:24:56 Caller Yeah, and so ever since I've been on my antidepressants, I've like been talking to people and making friends and...

1:25:01 Drew Well, Mary, listen. Yeah. You're thinking about these things, you're investigating, you're under supervision, you're under care, you're getting therapy. You're doing what would be sort of generally called normal freshman behavior. And yes, indeed, it always does mean something when people do that kind of thing. And mostly people kind of get through that and figure out what makes them happy, what kind of relationships they want to have. And you're probably going through that same thing. And you may have a little more meaning because of your history, and you may be working on some issues in therapy, and it may be sort of expressing itself through these relationships. But all things being equal, the behaviors are in the realm of normal. What did you say, Adam?

1:25:38 Adam Where did you get the money to buy these condoms? I mean, that's some pocket change back then. Condoms weren't free back then.

1:25:46 Drew It was like 20 bucks, that's what I remember.

1:25:48 Adam Well, that's what I'm saying. I mean, condoms, I don't know, buck a piece now or 50 cents or whatever, or free at a gay club. But I mean, they cost a little more back then, didn't they?

1:26:00 Drew No, no, no, no.

1:26:01 Adam Same price?

1:26:02 Drew Less.

1:26:03 Adam Less?

1:26:03 Drew I think.

1:26:04 Adam No, it wouldn't be less. It couldn't be less.

1:26:08 Drew Well, there was no fancy stuff back then. It was all...

1:26:11 Adam Yeah. It's just the basic stuff.

1:26:13 Drew It was an actual sheep's stomach.

1:26:16 Adam What you want? Large or extra large? So, I mean, where did you get the money? Where did you have it? You have a job?

1:26:27 Drew Yeah, I did work.

1:26:28 Adam You did work? You had money saved up?

1:26:30 Drew Yeah.

1:26:30 Adam You folks know that money they're giving you is going to condom money?

1:26:34 Drew Yeah, it's interesting. I don't know where that money came from.

1:26:36 Adam Let's think about that. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

1:26:41 We'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:26:45 Adam What are you doing with all those condoms? You sell to a friend? Hey, y'all, Loveline. I'm Adam. That is Drew. Phone number. Oh, no. I'm reading these questions. There's one that says boobs down here, so let's talk to this one. Patrick?

1:27:30 Caller Yeah.

1:27:30 Adam You're 18?

1:27:31 Caller Yeah.

1:27:32 Caller Okay, my phone. I'm sorry.

1:27:36 Drew Hold on. We just want to hear the Santa Fe Pacific going by there.

1:27:42 Caller The what?

1:27:42 Drew Go ahead. What's up?

1:27:43 Caller Okay.

1:27:46 Adam You know that train that's going by your house? Yeah. Okay.

1:27:50 Caller Okay. My girlfriend went to the doctor a couple of weeks ago, maybe a week ago.

1:27:55 Adam What?

1:27:57 Caller She called me before she left and she said that she's just going for an usual checkup.

1:28:04 Drew Do you live at the train station?

1:28:05 Caller No. I'm about a mile away from my house.

1:28:09 Adam Okay.

1:28:10 Drew I've not heard train was like that ever. What's that? A movie about the turn of the century. Go ahead.

1:28:17 Caller Okay. She told me that she was just going for an annual checkup and she said that she's getting something else checked but she didn't want to tell me what it was. I said, okay, well, will you tell me when you get back? She says, well, if there's anything wrong, she will. Well, when she called me when she got home, she said there was nothing wrong, but I still wanted to know what it was. And now she, like, I kind of figured out that it was her boobs. And like now when we make out or when we do whatever, whatever, you know, she won't let me touch him. So I like it.

1:28:49 Adam Well, she used to, she let you touch him before?

1:28:52 Caller Yeah.

1:28:53 Drew It doesn't make any sense.

1:28:54 Caller It doesn't.

1:28:55 Adam How did you figure out it was her boobs?

1:28:58 Caller It's basically like playing like 20 questions.

1:29:02 Drew And then since then, the train distracted us. And then since then she won't let you touch them or she already would have not let you touch them before you guessed.

1:29:10 Caller No, she won't let me touch him since she went to the doctors.

1:29:14 Adam Right. Since since he guessed. Yeah. Right. No. Yes. So why don't you ask her what's up with that?

1:29:21 Caller Well, I've been trying and she just won't tell me what it is. And she says, well, because it's embarrassing.

1:29:27 Adam But that you can't have you seen them?

1:29:30 Caller Yeah.

1:29:31 Adam What did it does it? They look any different?

1:29:33 Caller No, they look perfectly normal to me.

1:29:35 Drew But you can look at them, but you can't touch them.

1:29:38 Caller Basically.

1:29:39 Drew Basically.

1:29:40 Caller Like I could like like you could touch like like I can't push on him or anything like that. I'm saying like I can't squeeze her or anything.

1:29:47 Drew Did she maybe have some discharge from the nipple or something?

1:29:50 Caller I'm not sure.

1:29:51 Drew I bet you that's what it was. And that's sort of embarrassing her for some reason. Is she on any medication? Just very quickly. Any medication? No, no, wrong.

1:29:58 Caller Oh crap.

1:29:59 Adam What is he on for?

1:30:01 Drew Is she on any medication, Patrick?

1:30:02 Caller Not that I know of.

1:30:03 Drew Well, women can sometimes produce breast milk. Pregnancy, stimulation like with your mouth or your hand. Thyroid problems, medication. So she may be getting that checked out.

1:30:13 Adam You know, the only part that I find more distracting than the background sound is the across the board refusal to acknowledge it by the people who call the show.

1:30:24 Drew Yeah.

1:30:25 Adam That's the part I get obsessed with it.

1:30:29 Drew But see what you see normal human brains, their first order of business is screening out background noise.

1:30:35 Adam What did you say? I'm not listening.

1:30:36 Drew That's what I'm saying. Anything that is sort of repetitive or unusable is screened out.

1:30:42 Adam Yes.

1:30:42 Drew Your brain doesn't do that.

1:30:44 Adam Oh, it doesn't.

1:30:45 Drew Your brain attaches to those things and just obsesses about them.

1:30:48 Adam Yeah.

1:30:49 Drew That's why you don't sleep at night.

1:30:50 Adam It's a great life. It's great. Nick?

1:30:53 Caller Yeah.

1:30:55 Adam You take Percocet?

1:30:57 Caller Yeah.

1:30:58 Adam And lower a tab for good times, for fun?

1:31:01 Caller Yeah, basically.

1:31:03 Adam All right.

1:31:04 Caller I'm just wondering what the long-term effects are.

1:31:07 Drew Well, it's heroin and a pill, basically. It's the most serious form of addiction you can get.

1:31:12 Caller Is meth worse than that? Because I did meth for a long time a few years back, but I've been clean since 97.

1:31:17 Drew Well, you're not clean. You're just switching drugs.

1:31:19 Caller No, I've only done these pills for a couple of months.

1:31:22 Drew Well, you're in, and were you in recovery from the meth or are you just not using?

1:31:27 Caller I'm just not using it at all.

1:31:28 Drew Yeah, so predictably you would go back to something. That's the way addiction is. It comes back again unless you do something to treat it.

1:31:36 Caller I also started to smoke.

1:31:37 Caller I quit smoking for five years and then just barely started that too.

1:31:39 Drew You're talking pot?

1:31:41 Caller No, cigarettes.

1:31:42 Drew But you've upped the ante now. This Lortab, Percocet, Opiates, they are much more difficult to kick than any other drugs. They are themselves not more harmful to your brain. The amphetamine was worse for your brain and will give you a lot more psychiatric symptomatology and actually can cause brain damage, we think. Opiates, Percocet, Lortab will not do that, but it causes profound, profound addiction. The other thing that's recently been observed is that the medication in Lortab and Vicodin causes deafness. And if you're starting to have a hearing problem, it will become progressive and severe. You should see an otologist immediately.

1:32:14 Adam What are they? Otologists?

1:32:15 Drew Or ear, nose and throat. Otolaryngologist.

1:32:19 Adam Holy S. I never heard of that one. Lisa?

1:32:23 Caller Yeah?

1:32:23 Adam You're 17. You can't make your boyfriend have an orgasm?

1:32:26 Caller Yeah.

1:32:27 Adam Well, he may have. How old is he?

1:32:28 Caller He's 17.

1:32:30 Adam Does he have him on his own?

1:32:32 Caller Yeah, he said he does.

1:32:34 Adam So he's all right when he's peed now?

1:32:35 Drew Tell him to cut back on that. Huh? Tell him to cut back on that. Huh?

1:32:38 Caller Yeah, I told him to. And he said he would.

1:32:40 Drew No, he didn't. He didn't.

1:32:42 Caller What?

1:32:43 Adam See if he can do it in front of you.

1:32:46 Caller Okay.

1:32:47 Adam That's a nice step in the right direction.

1:32:48 Caller I just told him to try it.

1:32:50 Caller I'm like, okay, just finish it off. And he won't. He doesn't want to.

1:32:53 Adam Well, he's nervous. He's a little uptight. Guys are trained not to do that in front of prying eyes.

1:33:01 Drew It's weird. She's like, oh.

1:33:03 Adam It's weird at 17 to be doing that. You start making that weird face and stuff. And it's just kind of weird. And then, you know, they tell you, they go, they go, tell me, you know, tell me when you're ready to go. You know, all right. They're like, they're like curious, you know. Sometimes you don't say anything, they get weird. It's weird. It's very weird. Very weird. All right, we'll be back.

1:33:30 Drew All right, guys, here's the deal.

1:33:31 Caller Look in the hookup, call the Dateline.

1:33:33 Caller Stick a waste in time with the wrong person, call the Dateline.

1:33:36 Caller One call is all you need to make. Call the Dateline.

1:33:38 Caller 1-877-889.

1:33:41 Caller Date. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline.

1:34:19 Caller Well, that's it.

1:34:21 Adam Oh, belched up some more mean food.

1:34:23 Drew Oh, let's get out of here.

1:34:24 Adam Oh, for God's sake. Let's do that. All right, that's it, that's it. We're done. So until next time.

1:34:28 Drew Coming up, coming up.

1:34:30 Adam So until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. You take, you not come back. You back for business. You spook local. You blondie. Look like Leif Gert.

1:34:43 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Sunday, January 13, 2002