Episode 1000741102048

0:16 Voiceover 1-800-LOVE-191 Loveline starts now.

0:21 Voiceover Hey, everybody, this is Dr. Drew. Phone number, indeed, is 1-800-LOVE-191. And I am delighted to welcome into the studio tonight Ben Stein.

0:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Honored to be here, Dr. Drew.

0:33 Drew Well, it is such a pleasure. Ben is a prolific author, How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life, How to Ruin Your Financial Life. And as I recall, all written to try to give something to your son. Isn't that right?

0:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no, actually not. Not at all. As a matter of fact, I've written a lot of things encouraging my son to study harder, but no books yet.

0:55 Drew I thought you had said that you were...

0:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Girls fall madly in love with my son. He doesn't have any problem with love life and he doesn't really have any investment decisions to make at this stage. So he doesn't have to worry about that. But I'm trying in these books to make people realize what they do wrong, to ruin relationships. I'll give you an example, Dr. Drew. I have a friend in Washington, a beautiful young girl, and she's desperate to get married. She can't understand why she's not married. She's almost 30 and she does things like, when she was riding around with me a little while ago, telling me that she hates dogs and because dogs eat poopy. And I love dogs more than anything else in the world.

1:41 Drew There's nothing. Is your dog with you tonight?

1:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Both of my dogs are with me out in the car, right outside the studio. And so to tell me that who loves dogs, that she thinks dogs are dirty and dogs eat poopy is the height of insanity and is a perfectly good way to ruin a relationship. In fact, one, I'm gonna write a book or maybe an article, a long article soon called, How to Ruin a Perfectly Good Relationship. And that's one way is to tell someone who loves dogs, you think dogs are dirty because they eat poopy. Another good way is to go out on a date with somebody and in the middle of the day say, you know, I like you a lot and I'll have sex with you, but I'm really madly in love with the guy I was dating just before you because he treated me really, really bad and that made me fall in love with him. And that's a good way to ruin the relationship. I see a lot of that. I see a lot of that.

2:31 Drew I kind of thought, how to ruin your life, it sort of sounds like sort of paternalistic to a son. You know, it sounds very, no?

2:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no, it's really not aimed at him. It's aimed at grownups, a lot of grownups that I know.

2:42 Drew Well, but by the way, a lot of grownups of course can be benefited from that, you know?

2:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, no, my son is a special case. He's so incredibly good looking and physically fit that he sort of defies categorization because he's so smart and so physically fit that things come too easily to him. And I think it's not enough of a challenge. But anyway, I don't want to talk about my son. My son has a bad cold and I want him to go to sleep and get a good night's sleep.

3:13 Drew It's amazing what springs from one's loins.

3:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, my son is an incredibly unbelievably smart kid. He's really too smart for me.

3:22 Drew Nice. Now, I was reading something about your bio. By the way, if people want to learn more about Ben Stein, it's www.benstein.com. Can they buy the books there?

3:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay They can buy them on a place that they may have heard of called amazon.com.

3:37 Drew What's that again?

3:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay www.barnesandnoble.com and I'd be honored if they did, especially How to Ruin Your Love Life. That would be a good one for people listening to this show.

3:47 Drew But I read that you had been mugged by two gunmen in 2000. I didn't know about that.

3:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, we were having our house in Beverly Hills renovated and I pulled in after doing an episode of When Ben Stein's Money, actually four episodes, and I noticed as I got out of the car that two guys were walking into the garage and I thought they were workmen who were working on the house. And then I noticed they were wearing masks.

4:12 Drew Oh my God.

4:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And I noticed one of them had a gun.

4:14 Drew Oh.

4:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And he said, give me your wallet. And I did. He said, give me your watch. And I did. And then I said, please don't take my car because it has my dog in it. I said, but you can have the car as long as you don't take the dog. So then he said, get in the car and just stare straight ahead, which I did. And then they went away. But, oh no, at one point they said to me, you don't sound scared enough. I said, believe me, I'm plenty scared. They said, well, you don't sound scared. And I said, well, I am scared. What would you like me to do to show that I'm scared? I'm scared. Anyway, so then I went inside the house after they left to tell my wife and she started laughing.

4:54 Drew Oh my God.

4:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know. Well, my wife is fearless. To her, it's nothing. She has no fear.

4:59 Drew You sound pretty fearless, too, though.

5:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I'm totally fearful.

5:03 Drew What?

5:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Have you ever been robbed?

5:05 Drew No, I would lose it. I'd have PTSD for six months after that.

5:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I didn't like it at all. But that night, Tommy and I slept at my house in my apartment. I have a lot of property in LA. We slept at one of my apartments in West Hollywood and with a G-U-N very close by.

5:24 Drew What's up with the dogs? They didn't help out.

5:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, the dog was in the car and she didn't know. I mean, the dog doesn't know if somebody's got a gun. For all she knows, it's a sandwich.

5:35 Drew We'll give them a break. And you were doing work for Clear Eyes right now?

5:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I do. Oh boy, do I do a lot of work. I am the spokesman for Clear Eyes. I'm a spokesman for Town and Country Mortgage, which is a very big mortgage lending company. Wow. I was until very recently doing commercials for Mercury, and that may be renewed. I am the spokesman for, yeah, it's great, for the National Retirement Planning Coalition, which is a group of people concerned about the retirement of us baby boomers. And I'm also the spokesman for, what's the other thing? Oh, for a spokesman for an investment management firm called Lucia, Ray Lucia. So, and I do a lot of speeches, and I keep busy, but I doubt if I earn as much money as you or your former co-host Adam, but I earn a good living.

6:21 Drew He's now officially rich as he declares it.

6:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, he's been saying he's been rich for a long time.

6:26 Drew He's been saying he's a millionaire. He said he's a millionaire. Now, he's officially rich.

6:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, how rich is that?

6:32 Drew He's taken over Howard Stern, and you know that's big money.

6:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, wait a second. Wait a second. Howard Stern got big money because he was on all over the country, and Adam isn't, and Howard Stern had demonstrated power to draw a huge audience, which Adam does not so far. Although, I will say Adam is about 1,000 times smarter than Howard Stern.

6:52 Drew Yes, I agree with you.

6:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay 1,000,000 times. Adam is as smart as any person I've ever met in Hollywood.

6:58 Drew And as I recall, last time you were up here, that's Anderson putting his two cents in, the last time you were up here, we had a call where we were sort of going on and on with the abuse history. Remember this? It was sort of an extraordinary call. I can't remember what the call was, but I know you were very impressed by it.

7:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I can't get over your callers generally. Your callers generally seem to come from another planet. On the planet I live in, a bad day is when the maid doesn't show up. But these people come from a different planet. But let's keep going.

7:26 Drew These are Americans, Ben. This is the core of America.

7:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know. Well, I spend a lot of time out in the core of America. I travel all around the country speaking. I'm going to Monroe, Louisiana on Thursday. I spend a lot of time in North Idaho. I spend a lot of time in Rancho Mirage. I guess that's not the heart of America. Anyway, so I want to hear from some people.

7:46 Drew All right. Here we go. Let's get some of them going here. This now is Jessica's 23. For some reason, this isn't coming up. So give me one second here. One second. We're having a little bit of.

7:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I want to hear from.

7:58 Drew Technical problem. Yeah. Go ahead and put it up Anderson. This is line five.

8:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Put it up.

8:04 Drew Yes.

8:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Kind of a show is this.

8:06 Drew Put it on the air, line five. Jessica. Jessica. Anderson, what's happening there? We can't get Jessica. I can't hear her.

8:17 Caller I can't hear her either.

8:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I can't hear her either.

8:19 Let's try somebody else.

8:21 Drew All right. I'm going to try rebooting my entire system here. Yes, something seems to be happening.

8:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm going to put you Deanna on.

8:31 If you don't get Deanna, we've got big problems.

8:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay.

8:33 Drew Hold on. I have to start my whole system over again. So anyway, we can talk about you some more, though. Now people know...

8:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Can you talk and boot at the same time?

8:42 Drew Yes, I can do that. That's what I'm doing, in fact. Booting, when I was in college, booting meant vomiting. When you were in college...

8:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no. Booting means shooting heroin.

8:52 Drew Oh, really? Oh, you guys were cooler in the 60s or whatever.

8:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, boot it means shoot heroin or else take some other kind of drug. I have never taken heroin and never will, but that is what it means. Remember the first time you booted heroin, how great you felt? No, that is sort of like what that means.

9:10 Drew You are a heroin addict.

9:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That is, if you use that phrase a lot, it certainly means that. I would never use heroin in a million years, never have and never would.

9:20 Drew I still can't get this.

9:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Or methamphetamine. I still can't seem to get my cocaine or any other drug.

9:25 Drew So Anderson, if you could put line 5 up, that would be great.

9:27 Caller All right, I did last time. You still couldn't hear, which is troublesome.

9:31 Drew She was on the phone.

9:32 Caller She's up.

9:33 Drew She's up. No, Jessica. Jessica. Ben, can you hear Jessica?

9:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I cannot hear Jessica.

9:42 Drew Let's try. Why don't you try line 1? We can get that.

9:46 Caller Okay, line 1 is on now.

9:48 Drew It's not showing up.

9:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Deanna?

9:50 Drew Hello. There we are. That was the problem. Okay. So, call her, Deanna. What's going on?

9:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, when I have sex with this one guy, after I orgasm, I get so tight that he can't get back in. He gets pushed out.

10:11 Drew So he gets pushed out during the orgasm?

10:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah. And then he can't get back in. He can't even finger me to get back in.

10:19 Drew Because it hurts?

10:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think there's a name for that.

10:22 Drew There is. It's called vaginismus.

10:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Vaginismus, yes.

10:24 Drew That's right.

10:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It doesn't hurt or anything.

10:28 Drew Well, when you went...

10:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Maybe it doesn't hurt you, but it might hurt him. I doubt if he likes it. Maybe he does.

10:37 Drew He's disappointed.

10:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, what's the cure for this, Dr. Drew? I would think the cure for this would be booting up.

10:43 Drew Booting up is one way, I'm sure, that could get over this. But the reality is that when it's normal after the orgasm or during an orgasm, to have vaginal contractions, okay? And some women, that can be quite powerful. In your case, there's some post-orgasmic spasm of the floor, the musculature, of the pelvis, and that needs to give, you need to give it some time to relax. Basically, you're overstimulated, your body doesn't want any more stimulation at that point. How long do you think it would be before he could make another attempt at it?

11:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay If it were me, it would be about two weeks.

11:16 Drew I'm nearing that point, too.

11:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I have no idea, sadly enough, he's the only second person I've ever come with.

11:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How old is he?

11:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He's 29.

11:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I have a good idea for you. You should take, do you know what hydrocodene is?

11:40 Drew Oh, Ben.

11:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know what it is.

11:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm not going to take it.

11:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, we'll never know.

11:45 Drew It's disease that is advocating opiates for you. And that will create muscle relaxation.

11:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I was going to say that will create relaxation throughout your whole body. But I was not going to say you should take them illegally. I was going to say you should see your sex doctor and get him to prescribe them.

12:00 Drew I don't think they would go down that path. I think that just a little bit of time. I think it's a natural reaction. I think you've got to give it a little time. And just like when he sometimes...

12:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, wait a minute. I mean, the guy must be pretty unhappy about this. I think...

12:11 Drew Well, but they need to time it up better.

12:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You know, I have a good idea. I have a better idea.

12:16 Drew Well, let me just say, women have to wait for men to get their erection back. What's the big deal if he has to wait for her to sort of relax a little bit?

12:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why doesn't she...

12:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, that's the thing with him.

12:28 Drew He never loses his erection.

12:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, and it takes forever for him to come. And so, by the time he...

12:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And this is a problem?

12:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, it's done, but the fact that I tighten up, he's really good.

12:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why don't you... Have you ever thought... I have another suggestion for you. Do you know who Al Gore is? Yeah. Think about him while you're having sex, and that should allow you to delay the orgasm long enough for him to reach completion, and then you'll be all set.

13:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, part of the reason he lasts so long is he has a spinal injury, nerve damage, and I'm actually the only person to make him come in the last two years.

13:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My God, you must feel special.

13:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, he's really special.

13:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That is really great. What part of the country are you in?

13:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Iowa.

13:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That is great.

13:26 Drew See, when you were visiting Iowa, you missed part of the American populace.

13:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How did he hurt his back?

13:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He got in a car accident. He got hit.

13:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He must be so in love with you.

13:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, he's not.

13:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He's not?

13:40 Drew Why not?

13:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How do you know he's not? It sounds like he is. How do you know he's not in love with you?

13:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That's not the type of relationship we have.

13:47 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, what kind of relationship is it?

13:53 Drew Did you just use the F word?

13:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I thought you weren't allowed to use that on the radio. You are not allowed to use it. We'd like to apologize to the Federal Communications Commission for saying that. We are very sorry and we respectfully apologize to the FCC. I've known many commissioners of the FCC in my life and they're all fine men and women and we apologize to them.

14:13 Drew And thankfully we have a seven second delay so they got that out of the way for us.

14:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, wait a second. So you're friends who have sex with each other.

14:22 Drew But we want to talk to why she wants this to be more than just friendship. So can we bring her back Anderson? She's on. Okay, Dan, I'm sure you want this to be more than just friendship. Yes?

14:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I don't.

14:32 Drew Why not? Why not?

14:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You don't like him?

14:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I...

14:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't understand this. Why are you having sex with him if you don't like him? That to me sounds like a problem.

14:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I like him as a friend and I like him as a person. I'm just not really big into relationships.

14:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why? Why are you not big into relationships? I think, Dr. Drew, I think here we're getting to something. You're not big into relationships, but you like to do the wild thing with him and yet when you do the wild thing, you experience some kind of physical revulsion at doing it and are symbolically casting him out of your body while you claim that you like doing it and yet maybe if you loved him, you would not cast him out of your body like a child casting out demons.

15:22 Drew Like a foreign body.

15:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Like in The Exorcist.

15:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, you see.

15:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why don't you fall in love with him and see. Well, wait a second. Have you ever been in love with anyone?

15:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes.

15:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Who?

15:34 Drew Who?

15:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do I have to say his name?

15:37 Drew No, of course not. Who was this guy to you?

15:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But you can if you want.

15:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He was my first real boyfriend, I guess. I dated like three other guys building roller skating, for goodness sakes.

15:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And how old were you at the time that you like did it with him?

15:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I, well, I knew him since I was like a little kid because he was best friends with my brother.

15:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I hope you weren't doing it with him when you were a little kid.

16:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, no, we never had sex.

16:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, sure.

16:04 Drew So let me sort of put the pieces together here. You were not traumatized growing up. You weren't physically or sexually abused.

16:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, you always get on that, Dr. Drew. That has nothing to do with this story.

16:13 Drew But I'm just trying to make sure that that's not part of this because it does affect sort of how she will come to relationships.

16:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, the witness will answer. Were you traumatized when you were a child?

16:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

16:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay. Okay, now, have you ever had sex with anyone you really loved?

16:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

16:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Answer the question. Have you ever loved anyone? Have you ever really loved anyone?

16:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes.

16:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But this was the person you did not have sex with? You did have sex with him?

16:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

16:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So, you've never had sex with anyone you loved?

16:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No. Well, I loved him as a friend, but not more than that.

16:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What's your occupation?

16:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Occupation? I work at a Dollar General.

16:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Those are great stories. That has been an incredible stock. Anyway, well, let's see.

17:03 Drew Well, look, here's the deal. Something's up with her dad. That's usually what creates No, it isn't. No, it isn't. Yes, it is.

17:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, it is. It has nothing to do with her dad.

17:12 Drew Tell us about your dad. Tell us about your dad.

17:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Tell us in words of one syllable about your dad, just in words of one syllable.

17:18 Caller And watch your language.

17:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay In words of one syllable.

17:23 Drew Deanna?

17:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm trying to think of words of one syllable.

17:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay All right, never mind. They can be three syllables.

17:28 Drew Just describe your feelings of three or four syllables.

17:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But they can't be more than four.

17:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He was a truck driver, a very quiet person.

17:39 Drew Your feelings about your dad.

17:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, my feelings about him? Indifferent.

17:47 Drew So you're disconnected from him.

17:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah. He had a daughter long before I was born, and she died, and so we were never really close, but we had like, I really liked horses and so did he, so he got me a horse.

18:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, wait a second. Let me just tell you. All right, here we go. Let me just tell you something. Your name is Deanne? Okay, let's just tell you something. I am probably one of the oldest people you've ever talked to. I'm older than... How old is your father?

18:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He was 69.

18:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Is he no longer living?

18:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He is no longer living.

18:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, I'm very sorry. I apologize.

18:29 Drew What happened to him?

18:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I'm not older than your father. But I find, generally speaking, that women... Like, she just said he died.

18:36 Drew I mean... Well, I want to make sure he wasn't an...

18:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Don't tell me you think that her vaginismus is going to be relevant to the cause of her father's death.

18:44 Drew You're sure they're not going to try to connect those two things? I'm just trying to get a picture of why she can't feel close to people, why that's overwhelming to her. And if her dad was an addict and a truck driver and never available, that would be...

18:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, people can feel very close to addicts. I mean, I've had many addicts in my life that I've been very close to and so have we all.

19:02 Drew Absolutely, but if it's your dad, you'll tend to only feel close to people like that. You'll tend to go for people that aren't available to you. And then when that doesn't work out...

19:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She's not saying that he's not available to her. She says she doesn't like him that much. Let's ask this question. Why do you like horses so much? What's so great about a horse?

19:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know.

19:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Come on, tell us.

19:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay They're being quiet and strong and confident.

19:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I have never known a woman who was really, really into horses, who was able to form a genuine attachment to a man. I'm sorry to say that.

19:42 Drew Is that right?

19:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Not only that, my psychiatrist, whom I've been going to now for 25 years, is probably the best psychiatrist in the world, except for you. I know you're not a psychiatrist.

19:51 Drew No, I'm an internist.

19:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He has said that if you find a woman who's really into horses, she's never going to be able to form a strong attachment with men. So I think you've got to choose, Diane.

20:02 Drew You're a busy man for talking about dad.

20:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Is it horses or is it men? What is it? Come on.

20:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, since I haven't rode a horse since I was 10.

20:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay. Well, then I think you've made your choice. You want men. I don't understand why you can't fall in love with this guy.

20:20 Drew Right. And this is the bottom line. Does he have bad breath? That closeness is required. To be able to be in love, you have to feel comfortable in closeness, the proximity to other minds, other people, to have intimacy. She feels close to his dick.

20:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I mean, so she's close to him already, but she's not...

20:39 Drew Anderson?

20:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She's not feeling close to his... Anderson? Anderson? She's not feeling close to him psychologically.

20:50 Drew No, right. And that's the point. No, no, that's the point. And dad was unavailable, whatever, maybe or maybe not, that is something to do it, but the fact is she needs to make a commitment to finding ways to take herself into closeness, because... All right, I'm putting her on hold. Still not working. Because that's what people need to be happy, right? I mean, is that simple enough?

21:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I couldn't... No, it's too complicated. I could not agree more, but first she's gotta just get those horses out of her mind altogether.

21:19 Drew I agree.

21:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So she's 20... You're 23, right?

21:22 Drew She's 23. We gotta move on to another caller. All right.

21:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, we love talking to you, DeAnne, and we hope that you have a good life.

21:28 Drew All right. Let's talk to line three, Anderson, Veronica. You want to go to commercial now?

21:33 Caller Yeah, we can try and figure out your phone, maybe.

21:34 Drew That's a mess.

21:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, actually, I already figured it out. There's nothing we can do.

21:37 Drew What's the matter?

21:38 Bad phone line.

21:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We love you, DeAnne. We're sorry. Want to go to Veronica real quick?

21:43 Drew No, we can take commercial if you want.

21:44 Okay.

21:45 Drew All right. So here we are. Ben Stein with us tonight. You know him from many projects, not the least of which is Ferris Bueller. Win Ben Stein money, turn Ben Stein on. He is a prolific author. How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life, How to Ruin Your Financial Life are books to live by, right? I would say, Ben. God bless you.

22:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're very generous to say that.

22:04 Drew Well, no, they are very wise and they're things not to be missed.

22:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're very generous to say that.

22:08 Drew And very clever too. So we'll be back with Ben Stein.

22:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're very generous to say that.

22:12 Drew And we'll be back after this.

22:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Bueller. Bueller. Bueller.

22:36 Drew The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191. With us tonight, Ben Stein. And a lot of people know that Ben Stein is a smart guy and a prolific author, but I'm not sure everyone knows that he was a speechwriter for Richard Nixon.

22:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And Gerald Ford.

22:49 Drew And Gerald Ford went to Columbia. And then Yale Law School. Did you become an attorney? Did you?

22:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was briefly a trial attorney, but I hated it. I don't like arguing. I really do not like arguing.

22:59 Drew What kind of stuff were you doing?

23:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was doing what's called trade regulation, which is a false and deceptive advertising law. And it was all, almost all of it was about a very, very large fruit flavored drink called Hi-C. And we were alleging that the advertisements were not factual. And we did not win the case. And I don't think I should have won.

23:20 Drew Hi-C is not good for you.

23:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I think Hi-C is good for you. As a matter of fact, I was sort of ordered to proceed with the case. I myself have always been a big fan of Hi-C, but it was a typical example of government overreaching and meddling.

23:34 Drew Do you put your law degree to use to this day? Are you glad you have that?

23:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, I do. I have people ask me legal questions and I give them answers. I don't get paid for it, but I just give them advice. And I had a great time in law school. Wifey and I were in law school together, and Wifey and I used to have a lot of fun. We would get incredibly high and play bridge and cheat at bridge and just be riotously, unbelievably high. We were there at the same time as George Bush, as a matter of fact, and that was sort of the fashion then. We had a lot of fun. I had more fun in law school.

24:07 Drew Did you know him?

24:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I met him once or twice because I was one of the people who ran the Yale Law School Film Society, and he used to come to our movies on occasion. He was a funny guy.

24:17 Drew And how about Bill and Hillary? Were they there then?

24:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hillary was a first year when I was a third year, and I knew her slightly, and my wife knew her a little bit. And Bill came the year after that and I didn't know him. I've never met him. He did send me an incredibly kind letter when my father died. I had a prominent father. And so I do not share the anger against him that many Republicans feel. I think he was basically a pretty good guy.

24:42 Drew Good administrator, that's for sure.

24:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think he was a very capable guy.

24:45 Drew Yeah, it's, and I'm not sure people around the country appreciate, Yale Law School is, that's, particularly in that period of history, top of the heap. I mean, that's where everybody wanted to go.

24:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It was a very, it still is. Very, very good law school. And I had nothing but smart people around me, many much smarter than I was.

25:01 Drew Let's take some calls here, Ben. This is Crystal, who is 13. Crystal.

25:05 Caller Hello.

25:06 Drew Hold your breath, there we go. Hi, Crystal.

25:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How are you? How was your weekend?

25:10 Caller It was good.

25:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How was yours?

25:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Fine. Where are you calling from?

25:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay California.

25:14 Drew Did you have a nice Thanksgiving?

25:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

25:16 Drew Excellent. And this is where you tell us what you'd like us to respond to.

25:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay. I like this guy and he looks at porn and he masterbates and stuff like that. And like he knows that I like him and he thinks I'm like some like innocent kind of girl and stuff like that.

25:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you really a bad girl?

25:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Like I masterbate and look at porn and stuff like that too. But he doesn't do that. You do?

25:43 Drew This is the ubiquitous Internet.

25:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do you watch the porn on the Internet or do you buy discs and watch it?

25:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay On the Internet.

25:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What's your favorite one site?

25:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know.

25:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You don't know? How do you get to it?

25:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know. My friend sends it to me.

26:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He sends you a link or she sends you a link? What's on the site?

26:06 Ben Stein – Full episode replay The stuff.

26:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And so you... OK, go ahead.

26:11 Drew What's your question about this?

26:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was wondering if I should tell him that.

26:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, what's the point of telling him? Because you want him to be your boyfriend, and you want him to know that you're sexually experienced, at least to some extent.

26:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know, like, because...

26:30 Drew Crystal, here's my basic take. It is absolutely fine that you do that. It is normal, it is healthy, it's good that you're understanding, learning about yourself. Don't get lost in all that. It can get over-stimulating and your brain is still... Well, I don't know about that. Well, no, we don't know, think about it, Ben. We don't really know the impact of all that pouring down on 12, 13, 14-year-olds. It may not be a big deal, but we don't know. So it's fine.

26:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, are you still, what grade are you in, Crystal?

26:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm in eighth.

26:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you able to do your homework?

26:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

26:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you able to go to gym class?

27:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

27:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you able to help your mother clean up from dinner? Well, I mean, are you basically a responsible human being?

27:08 Drew Yeah, of course she is. Of course she is, but here's the deal.

27:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Of course she is. You get the most psych of bitches in the world calling in here. Well, that's true.

27:15 Drew We do. But Kelly, you get the feeling, when people are really sick, that you feel a certain way and she doesn't give you that feeling certainly. But here's the deal. I don't want her to feel ashamed for masturbating. Women should do that. It's fine. It's healthy. So be it. Great. But Ben, consider this. Let's take a bunch of adolescent primate chimpanzees and let's stimulate them in all kinds of crazy images that make them excited. And do you think that might change the trajectory of their neurobiological development? I don't know.

27:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We don't know that either, but I'm a little more puzzled by the next thing. Do you want to have sex with this other 13-year-old boy? Is that why you want it? You're thinking of telling him that you are sexually active, at least with yourself. Is that the point of it? Well, so that's the real issue. I think 13 is a little old to start up. Wait, no, wait a second. I got that backward.

28:11 Caller A little young.

28:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I'm kidding. I love my own jokes.

28:16 Drew How are the clear eyes people going to feel about this?

28:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, they don't. They won't be listening to this. They stay very sober. People have got a better life. This 13 is too young to start having sex with this guy, don't you think? I mean...

28:29 Drew Absolutely. I mean, it's really pretty young. Yes, yes. It's really pretty darn young. One thing that current research suggests is that really the brain cannot handle until about 16 the effects of intimacy and that it becomes traumatizing. It's overwhelming prior to that age. It really leaves effects. I've never met a woman who had sex before the age of 16 that didn't wish that she'd waited longer.

28:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I've never met a woman who wished they'd never had sex.

28:59 Drew That's right. You'll rarely meet a woman who says...

29:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I've never met a woman who had sex with me.

29:04 Drew Well, that's a different issue, but you rarely meet a woman who says, I wish I had lost my gender earlier. Lots of guys say that, but you'll never meet a woman who will always say, I wish I had waited.

29:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I have met women who wish they'd had sex earlier. I've certainly met women who wish they'd had more sex.

29:22 Drew Yes.

29:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But Crystal, what do you think will happen to you if you have sex with this man? What do you think, how do you think your life will change if you have sexual intercourse with this other 13-year-old person? How will your life be different?

29:38 Drew Yeah, that's one way.

29:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How else besides possibly getting pregnant do you think you... I mean, how else do you think it would change?

29:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't want to have sex with him. I just want to turn him on.

29:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, wait a second. Why do you want to turn him on except to have sex with him?

29:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know.

29:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So, you want to torture him with your young body. Is that it? I mean, what is the point?

30:11 Drew See this is what concerns about the porn raining down on these kids, Ben.

30:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Very confusing for them.

30:16 Drew They're seeing all these sexual images that are adult in nature, that have meaning to adults, and they're making their own meaning of it based on very primitive understanding, and it leads to trouble. Well, let's go to Veronica, who's 25.

30:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you for calling very much, Crystal.

30:28 Drew Thank you. Yes, absolutely. Thank you.

30:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Good luck to you, Crystal.

30:30 Drew Veronica?

30:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hello? Yes.

30:32 Drew Hey, what's up? You're on with Ben Stein.

30:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And Dr. Drew.

30:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes. All right. I've been waiting to get on your show for quite some time. Every time I call, it's always busy, but anyway, I need some insight on something.

30:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay.

30:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, it seems like every guy that I come across and I end up making friends with, I have to have sex with them.

30:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why? Why do you have to do that?

31:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know. And it's difficult.

31:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You mean they make you do it at gunpoint? Or what? What do you mean? You say you have to do it?

31:07 Drew I don't know.

31:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I just, I really, I don't know why.

31:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How old are you?

31:11 Drew 25. We call that a boundary problem. A boundary difficulty.

31:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Kansas or Missouri?

31:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was just there giving a speech. It's a really nice place. And there's a good place for ribs there, I think.

31:23 Drew Oh, yes. A couple of them.

31:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah. Well, let me ask you a question. How did, give us a scenario about how the friends into lovers thing happens. I mean, you're out, you're out getting it, going to a movie, say, or having a hamburger with the guy. And then how do you next find yourself having sex with them?

31:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How does that work out?

31:47 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This weekend, I went to a friend's house, went to a house party, and there was this guy that I saw from a previous party, and we ended up having sex that night.

31:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know, but you didn't, and it didn't like, stop making those noises. They're really, they're really distracting.

32:01 Drew So you didn't just, you didn't run in the bedroom, you met, you talked, what happened?

32:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And you talked to him, did he say like, I dig you, I want you, I need you, or did he give you drugs, or what happened? And so what drugs did he give you?

32:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, we smoked a little bit, but-

32:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Smoked a little of the Reefer, the Chronic?

32:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, we-

32:19 Drew Ben, say Chronic again.

32:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you smoke the Chronic? What did you smoke, the Chronic?

32:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Huh?

32:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did he have a good stash?

32:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, I don't know how it happens. It's just like, we get to talk and-

32:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Wait a minute, you don't know how it happens? Well, I don't know what I do. Are they giving you Rohypnol? I mean, you don't know how it happens?

32:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I mean, it could be that I drink a little bit too much.

32:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Ah, a little bit. How many drinks did you have?

32:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, that not it. I think I had seven.

32:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Seven drinks and you smoked the ganja and you wonder how it happened?

32:59 Caller That's why I did that little sound. No, no, no.

33:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I usually don't.

33:01 Drew He knows. He knows.

33:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This is a recent thing, but it centers around drinking. That's usually how it happens.

33:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, that's usually how it happens for everybody.

33:13 Drew Is there alcoholism in your family? Is this part of an alcoholic process?

33:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did your father abuse you?

33:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where's my bourbon? No.

33:19 Caller Uh-uh. He didn't.

33:21 Drew I was kidding.

33:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was making fun of Dr. Drew.

33:24 Drew But alcoholics.

33:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So your father didn't abuse you and yet you're having sex. Now, this is a mystery.

33:29 Drew No, no. Well, no, no.

33:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why would anyone whose father didn't abuse her ever have sex?

33:33 Drew It's hard to believe that. It's hard to imagine.

33:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I can't imagine that.

33:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I think my father was really quiet growing up. He never...

33:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, well, that's another form of abuse. That's called quiet abuse. Dr. Drew knows a lot about that. Why don't you... Okay, so I have an idea. Why don't you try not drinking for a couple of weeks and see what happens? I bet you will find you don't have quite as much sex.

33:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Maybe, maybe not.

33:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What do you mean, maybe not? Have you ever had sex with somebody who met the same night without either having the chronic or some other drug or else alcohol ever?

34:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, I have.

34:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You have when?

34:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's not as much.

34:16 Drew When? Did you want to then?

34:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you want to? Who was the guy?

34:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It was a guy, a couple of guys back at my old college that I went to.

34:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What college?

34:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, it was a college team. It wasn't a party, it was a summer room.

34:29 Drew You were just what? You were just doing what? Hanging out in the dorm room.

34:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You were hanging out in the dorm room, none of you was high, and you just said, come on dudes, let's get it on and you proceeded to tear that hotel down? I don't get that. How did that work? That you're sitting there, you're watching a football game, and the next thing you know the guy is doing you and you don't know how it happened?

34:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, you know, it could be anything from like watching a movie and then we start getting sitting closer together and then he puts his arm around me and then we start kissing.

35:00 Drew But all guys are going to want to do that with you, right? You know that.

35:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you cute? What are you wearing right now?

35:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I have a huge jacket on because it's fricking cold here.

35:10 Drew But Veronica, here's the deal, let's get to it. Is there alcohol in your family? Are you likely to have inherited that genetic potential?

35:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, it's only on the weekends once in a while whenever I drink.

35:21 Drew Veronica, answer my question.

35:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay When was the answer to this question, witness?

35:25 Drew Is it in your family system? Is there a genetic potential here?

35:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, but drugs is.

35:30 Drew So who's the addict?

35:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Respect my authorita.

35:32 Drew Who's the addict?

35:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay God, my brother, he's a drug addict, my other brother is an alcoholic.

35:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, so how many drinks do you think you have in a typical week on average?

35:47 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Probably five, and that's during the weekend.

35:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You only have five for the whole weekend?

35:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, Friday or Saturday night, but then I go through the first of it, like I'll like go out like crazy for three months and then I won't go out and I get this like feminazi mood. It's really weird.

36:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Wait a minute, what's feminazi mood?

36:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My brother calls it.

36:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What does that mean?

36:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He calls me all guys and I would just want to take them all down and yeah.

36:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, so you have very ambivalent feelings about men.

36:17 Drew Yes, yes. She acts them out sexually and then she hates them for participating with her.

36:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But do you hate them for helping to humiliate you? Do you feel like you've been humiliated?

36:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Maybe like there's guilt afterwards.

36:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do they ever call you afterwards and do you ever?

36:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay They'll call in one of two or four.

36:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do it again.

36:39 Drew Do it again.

36:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Go back Jack, do it again.

36:41 Drew All right, Veronica, one way you can look about this.

36:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I think there's a lot more to be said to Veronica.

36:45 Drew Oh, absolutely. Well, you want to put it on hold? Because I got to take commercial break.

36:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I like Veronica.

36:49 Drew Okay, I do too. She's very interesting.

36:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We like you, Veronica. What are you wearing in the mail?

36:52 Drew Hey, Ben, easy.

36:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Sorry.

36:55 Drew There's a window in that studio.

36:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

36:57 Drew Yeah, sure. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course, of course. Yeah, sure. Yeah, yeah, sure. Anyway, but there's one of the ways to conceptualize what's going on with her. And there are many different psychological issues, obviously, with her. But one is that this is part of an alcoholic addictive process. And one of the things that happens neurobiologically is that sex will activate that same, what's called the medial forebrain bundle that the alcohol does. And when you're in a system, when you're in a sort of a binge where you're being driven by that system, sex and alcohol go together for some people. And so this may be all part of that.

37:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well of course, because they all make you feel good, they all release that thing, those things in the blood that make you feel good. I mean, there's a reason why people have been drinking for many centuries and people have been having sex for many centuries.

37:39 Drew Well, but when it gets out of control, but when it gets out of control, we know that the mechanism in the medial forebrain takes over and you can't use your volition the way you'd like to because the drives intensify.

37:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, she wouldn't be calling us if she were happy with her behavior, so we know there's something wrong. But what I wonder is why does she get in this mood of anger at the men over something she's done herself? I mean, you've never been raped, have you, Veronica?

38:06 Drew Well, we're going to find out if Veronica's been raped. We're going to end with Ben Stein. Be sure to check out his books at amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com. It's How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life, and or How to Ruin Your Fate. I want to find out if she's been raped. Hang on. Ben, you ought to put them in a little, like a threesome packet for Christmas. You know what I mean?

38:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, we're going to.

38:28 Drew Perfect. So you can buy the Christmas package of Ben Stein's books. And when we return, it's 1-800-LOVE-191. When we return, we're going to find out, first of all, if Veronica's been raped. We'll be right back. I'm a rapist.

38:41 Yep, Loveline will be back.

38:43 Drew Glad to hear it.

38:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Loveline will be right back.

38:59 Drew Hey, it's Loveline, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, a very special Loveline where you are getting the benefit of the wisdom of the great Ben Stein. And in fact, we're sort of breaking one of our rhythmic rules here, which is we try to go call every three or four minutes. We're going like 12, 14 minutes.

39:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm sorry. Well, you do whatever you think you want.

39:17 Drew No, no, that's what I want. No, no, I like it. I'm just apologizing to people. Were you abused as a child, Dr. Drew? No, no.

39:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why do you feel you have to be in all these rhythms, then?

39:27 Drew You know, I was abused as a co-host for a long time, and I was abused into certain sort of rhythms and things.

39:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, exactly. Veronica, are you still there?

39:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm still here.

39:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How tall are you, Veronica?

39:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Five nine.

39:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Whoa, that's pretty tall.

39:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Want us to get her number off air for you, Ben?

39:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no. How much do you weigh?

39:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm 140.

39:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That's about right. Let me ask you a question. After you've had these sexual incidents with people who you're not really close to, do you wake up the next morning and say, God, I'm a slut and hate yourself?

40:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I used to think that, like, I didn't have sex until I was 18. But I used to go through that and I was like, no, I mean, it should be okay for a woman to have sex, you know, controlled sex, you know, with condoms and birth control.

40:16 Drew Well, don't, you're convincing yourself of stuff that you weren't feeling is the problem.

40:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But you, yeah, do you, that's a good point, Dr. Drew. Do you feel ashamed of yourself right now?

40:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Only because my friend said something to me, my friend that went with me at that health party.

40:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did she have sex, too?

40:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay With her boyfriend, yeah.

40:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay At the party?

40:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

40:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you watch?

40:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

40:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, just wondering.

40:43 Caller No.

40:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I didn't watch, sorry.

40:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How do you know she had sex? Did you just tell her?

40:48 Drew Oh, Ben.

40:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I'm sure they did.

40:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay They have sex all the time, so.

40:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, well then, so, but this is a guy who's her steady boyfriend.

40:55 Drew Right.

40:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, exactly.

40:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So have you ever had a steady boyfriend?

41:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I am in the middle of a divorce right now.

41:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So, you were married?

41:06 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, we went out for five years and all we did was have sex. There is nothing else in the relationship. And that's why we're getting divorced now, because we didn't know each other. All we did was have sex. Well, I was really addicted. Like, I've calmed down quite a bit.

41:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're addicted to sex?

41:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

41:22 Drew And you were not abused?

41:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Not physically, but I was molested by-

41:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Ah, so there we go. Was this the thing with Al Gore?

41:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Um, no.

41:36 Drew No, sexual abuse plus biology, genetics of addiction creates sexual addictions.

41:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Who was-

41:43 Drew It's very unusual.

41:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Tell us about the abuse incident.

41:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My brothers, they had, I don't know, molested me one time. And then I had a childhood friend, which I'm thinking this could be the link to all of it. From like the age of five until the age of ten, he would always like, when we'd go over to his, like my mom would go over to their house and I'd see him, and he'd always like try and get me in his bedroom and take advantage of me. And this went on for many years, and I never told my mother about it.

42:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think this is something going on here. You are equating sex and being touched and being entered with being cared about and loved, which is not necessarily the same thing.

42:24 Drew You know what the extraordinary thing about the human being, Ben, is that when we are traumatized in childhood, we enter our adult life and reenact the same traumas over and over and over again. And of course, our culture tells you, it's cool. Why not? It's whatever you want. You're just into sex. No, it's a highly, highly dysfunctional behavior, and it needs to be treated. You are getting sexually addicted. This is the classic setup for sexual addiction. And everyone who gets into these behaviors is miserable. They're angry with themselves and ashamed. They're angry with the men for participating and reenacting these traumas. And it's a very serious situation. You've already lost one marriage because of it.

42:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And the last, let's see, today is November 28th. How many men have you had sex with in the last six months?

43:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Probably, God, 10, 12?

43:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That isn't that many, Dr. Drew, is it?

43:14 Drew No, but listen, I'm telling you this, she's got all the earmarks of trouble here, and I suggest that she gets some help with it.

43:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, how many times a week would you say you have sex typically?

43:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's random, it really depends, like this weekend, I had, well, I only had sex with one person this weekend.

43:29 Drew Only?

43:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, only one person.

43:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

43:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you have sex with any other kind of being?

43:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, during like the sexual spurts, it could be, I could have sex with four people, four or five people over the week.

43:43 Drew Veronica, Veronica, seriously, I deal with this stuff all the time in my professional life, and you've got to get some help with this. You just see, you just see a general therapist or somebody particularly who has a history of helping people with addictions because that is what's burgeoning here. This is going to link into a chemical addiction too, eventually. And you're unhappy with this, you called us about it. Do something about it. If you want to do something that's free, go to a 12-step meeting.

44:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, that's just what I was going to say. There is something called Sex Addicts Anonymous. You can go to it. They give you a form to fill out and tells you whether you are, can be considered a sex addict. Do you do it to the point where you feel ashamed? Do you feel that people are making you do it? Have you ever done it when you didn't want to? Do you do it with people just so you can seem to please them? Do you ever do it even though you don't?

44:26 Drew That seems to know a little too much about this test, but anyway.

44:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, I think you should try a Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting and see if there is one in... Kansas City. I'm sure there is in a big city like Kansas City, which is a wonderful city, by the way. It has incredibly nice people.

44:41 Drew Good barbecue.

44:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no, there's a very, very, very nice city. Incredibly nice people.

44:44 Drew They are nice. The people in the Midwest, come on, are so nice.

44:47 Ben Stein – Full episode replay People in the Midwest are the salt of the earth.

44:49 Drew Yes, I agree.

44:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I enjoy talking to you, Veronica, and we hope you have a great life.

44:54 Drew Call me back. Let me know how this turns out. This is now a-

44:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Call me back too.

44:59 Drew Ben, I'll get you back, and then we'll get Veronica back.

45:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Good.

45:02 Drew Kathleen, this is Kathleen's 21. Kathleen, this is for Ben.

45:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hi.

45:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hi, Kathleen.

45:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How are you guys? Fine.

45:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How are you?

45:09 Caller Oh, PP. King.

45:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where are you from, Kathleen?

45:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm from Santa Rosa, in California.

45:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, we love California, OK?

45:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I love California, too. It's kind of wet right now, but, you know.

45:19 Drew Really?

45:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's, it's boring, boring.

45:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, it's very pleasant down here in Southern California. Maybe you should consider moving down here.

45:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, boy.

45:29 Drew Did you have something to say?

45:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This is wonderful. Would you like to say something?

45:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I just wanted to say that, Ben Stein, you are amazing. Everything you've said so far tonight, I agree with wholeheartedly.

45:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, well, thank you.

45:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I like watching you, everything on TV, you're just wonderful.

45:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, we love you, Kathleen. What's your occupation?

45:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm a student right now.

45:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I major in archaeology and marine biology and minor in languages.

45:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What school do you go to?

45:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm at the JC and don't make fun of me, I go to the university.

46:02 Drew You're going to the university or you're planning to go there?

46:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm thinking about Monterey.

46:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, Adam Corolla, let me just make it, Adam Corolla is the one who makes fun of people who go to junior colleges. I don't.

46:13 Drew We don't.

46:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We respect people who go to junior colleges. And if you want to really study marine biology and also have a great time, I recommend UC Santa Cruz, which is the coolest place in the world.

46:25 Drew And by the way, when Adam was in junior colleges in the seventies, when there was sort of a wastebasket there, now some junior colleges, certain Midwest and East, are really sort of, it's an honor to go there and they're cracks in the very high levels of education.

46:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We have very, very good junior colleges in California. All right, do you have a sex or love related question?

46:44 Drew No, no, I can't. I got it. This is a break I have to take on time. But Kathleen, here's the deal. You love Ben Stein so much, here's what you got to do. How to ruin your life, how to ruin your love life, how to ruin your financial life. Those are the books you go to Amazon, you buy, and they're now going to come in as a set for Christmas. So, you can talk to Ben Stein.

46:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you.

47:00 Drew Some more after this break. The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191. Hey, there, it's Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191, the great Ben Stein in the studio tonight. Ben, anything coming up in television for you in the near future?

47:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I don't think I'll ever be on TV again.

47:31 Drew Why?

47:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I'm just kidding.

47:32 Drew Okay.

47:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But no plans. I actually am in the process of trying to sell a show in which I would do all different jobs to see what it was like doing jobs, like being a greeter at Walmart, being a waiter at Denny's, being a information operator, being an ambulance driver, just trying all different jobs.

47:55 Drew That's a great idea.

47:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think we're fairly close to selling that. We shall see. A very smart friend of mine named Judith Friedman thought it up.

48:02 Drew That's a great idea.

48:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you.

48:03 Drew Tell me about your upbringing. Where did you grow up?

48:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I grew up in a suburb of Washington, DC called Silver Spring, Maryland. It was a very, very, very pleasant...

48:13 Drew The great Bate family used to live, right?

48:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know. You mean Master Bate? No, I actually went to school with some very famous people. I went to school with Carl Bernstein, the famous Watergate reporter. He lived next door to me. And also the year after me in high school, a close friend in high school, not a really close friend, a friend, was Goldie Hawn. And then right after her was Connie Chung. And in junior high, one of my classmates was Sylvester Stallone, so lots of famous people. But it was a very nice place to grow up. Very, very nice place.

48:46 Drew Anything you can shed light on for us as far as those people are concerned?

48:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, Goldie Hawn has always been a very nice, pleasant human being. And for all I know, she still is. I haven't seen her in a few years. I used to see her occasionally at Morton's, but I haven't seen her for a long time there. Carl Bernstein and I are still close friends, and he's a very amusing guy. I mean, I disagree with him politically about as much as a person can disagree, but America is such a great country that people can still be friends, even though they disagree politically. Connie Chung is a wonderful, wonderful young woman. I guess she's not as young as she was, but she's a very lovely woman. Sylvester Stallone was a skinny, gawky kid, and he and I used to hang out at the same pizza place. And he's a great guy. I mean, these are all great people. You know, I am closer to the people I went to high school with than to the people I went to law school or college with. And when my father died, several of them came to his funeral, and they're just really wonderful people. And it was a very close-knit group at Montgomery Blair High School. And we're still close-knit 43 years after we graduated.

49:45 Drew Was your dad in government?

49:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My father was an economist for a group called the Committee for Economic Development, which is a private businessman's group. And then under President Nixon, he was chairman of the Council of Economic Advisors. And that made him a member of the cabinet. And he was that briefly under Mr. Ford also. And then he became a professor at the University of Virginia. And he was on the Board of Directors of various public companies. And also a columnist for the New York Times. I'm sorry, for the Wall Street Journal for a long time. I'm the one who's a columnist for the New York Times.

50:16 Drew Ah, interesting.

50:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, you're very kind to ask.

50:20 Drew Let's take a call. Matt 16.

50:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hey, what's up, Drew?

50:24 Drew What's up, Matt?

50:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, hi. Ben, how are you doing?

50:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What up?

50:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah. I feel like I'm one of those people who like overly masturbates. And I mean, I should know like if they're in like long term like health risks, risks or like.

50:42 Drew No, you're not going to turn yourself inside out or anything like that. Though you can certainly, people do occasionally hurt themselves, their skin. You know, they actually go to the girl.

50:51 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, yeah. I got like a rash down there from from it.

50:55 Drew How many times a day are you doing this?

50:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Five, six.

50:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, my God, you're sick.

51:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Holy smoke.

51:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm just kidding. That's incredible. How do you have time to do anything else? What do you what do you are? Are you in school?

51:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah. Yeah.

51:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What grade?

51:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm 10.

51:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you a popular kid?

51:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What?

51:22 Drew How do you have time to do anything else?

51:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you a popular kid? Do people want to shake your hand?

51:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't think after this after this.

51:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I don't think so. I think could you try to cut it down to four times a day?

51:39 Drew Poor Matt. Some young male 16 to 19 will do this a couple of times a day. That for some men is a normal rate, some even three. But five times a day, you're getting in a compulsive range.

51:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This is a drug addiction. He's addicted to the drug that is secreted when he has an orgasm. He might as well be smoking crack. I mean, it's not illegal. Well, maybe it is illegal. Well, I don't think it's illegal. But it's maybe it is illegal. Now, I don't think it's illegal. But but it's but it's I mean, this is a this. Now, Dr. Drew, you are an addiction specialist. And I normally make fun of you saying that things are addictions. But this, I think we have can call a true addiction.

52:22 Drew Well, it is if it has consequences and if the sort of the right setup is there. In other words, addiction has a genetic basis to it. And so is there alcoholism in your family?

52:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, God, Drew, can't you ever get off that?

52:36 Drew No, no, you can't have addiction without the gene. And so one of the first questions I was...

52:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, do you think he's maybe... Why don't you ask your father if he's a chronic masturbator?

52:44 Drew Well, no, that's because it's a different syndrome if it's an addiction as opposed to a compulsion. And so what differentiates the addiction is the genetic potential for addiction. So is there alcoholism in your family somewhere?

52:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay There's a little bit on my dad's side.

52:58 Drew And is your dad an alcoholic?

52:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay When you say a little bit, what do you mean by a little bit?

53:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Like his brother, his brother is an alcoholic, but he is not.

53:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, how do you know your father's not an alcoholic? Maybe he's doing it secretly the way you're masturbating secretly.

53:14 Drew Or controlling something.

53:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Like we've had this talk before and he said that like, because I've been caught drinking before, my dad has told me that there's addiction in his family.

53:23 Drew Alright, so he's worried about you as a possibility. So it's not for sure.

53:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Dr. Drew, with all due respect to your obvious intelligence and education and experience, do you not think it is possible that he can be addicted to sex without also carrying a gene for alcoholism or drug addiction?

53:41 Drew In the definition of addiction, this is a 1992 consensus publication that was put out in the medical literature. Addiction required is a genetic disorder.

53:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't doubt that it does, but maybe the genetic disorder is an addiction to sex and now an addiction to alcohol.

54:01 Drew Oh, absolutely. But you need to see evidence of some addictive process being passed along.

54:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I mean, gee whiz, he's masturbating five or six times a day. What more do you want to see? Do you want to see him drowning?

54:14 Drew Well, he could be bipolar. He could be manic depressive and bipolar's do this. He could be a trauma survivor and trauma survivors sometimes do this.

54:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you a trauma survivor?

54:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

54:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you bipolar?

54:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No. I was dropped on the head of the child though.

54:29 Drew You were dropped on the head? No, I wouldn't.

54:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We all were.

54:33 Drew I don't know how to do this. All right.

54:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you very much. Just kidding. Just kidding.

54:39 Drew The deal is, Matt, you can go ahead and try to stop this if you want to. If you have consequences from it, if you have trouble functioning, if you hurt yourself physically, you said you already have a rash, and you still cannot stop in spite of attempts to do so, then that's something you may want to talk to somebody about and have more formal evaluation.

54:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let me go back to something. Have you ever heard of Al Gore?

55:00 Drew Think of Al Gore every time you want to masturbate.

55:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Every time you're thinking of masturbating, think of Al Gore and see how that works.

55:08 Drew This is a, you like the girl calls. This is Brad I was going to put up. But here's-

55:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, if you think Brad is a girl's name, we're in a lot of trouble.

55:15 Drew This is Tiffany, 19. You ever watch that show Laguna Beach, Ben, on MTV?

55:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, I do.

55:19 Drew Yeah, I know Tiffany, you do. Okay, Tiffany's from Laguna Beach. So here you go, Tiffany.

55:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, very good, Tiffany.

55:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hi, okay, I have a question. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for about four months and he always asks me to perform oral sex on him. But for some reason I get, I don't know if it's I get scared, it's just like I won't do it. And he like wants me to.

55:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I bet I know why you won't do it.

55:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why?

55:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Because you're afraid you won't do it right and he'll yell at you.

55:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, that has something to do with it, but it's like I've done it before.

55:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you do it right? Did you do it right?

55:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I was told I was good.

56:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, what are you worried? What do you think is going to happen to you?

56:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know.

56:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What do you think that he's going to not respect you in the morning?

56:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, it's not that. I don't know. I don't know. I have no idea.

56:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So, when he says to you go down on me, you think, oh, I'm scared I can't do it.

56:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I'm just like, no, let's just have sex instead.

56:27 Drew Oh, interesting. Interesting.

56:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Interesting.

56:30 Drew Very interesting. Can you tell us anything else? I mean, is there anything that happened to you? Anything you want to share with us?

56:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Were you abused as a child?

56:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I wasn't abused as a child.

56:40 Drew I wasn't going that way so much as did somebody ever force you to do this? You didn't want to?

56:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Um, I was raped a year ago.

56:47 Drew You were raped a year ago?

56:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Raped.

56:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, who did that?

56:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Um, my ex-boyfriend's best friend.

56:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're kidding. Did you go to the police about it?

56:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, and they, it was his second offense and they dropped the charges because alcohol was involved.

57:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, wait a minute, oh, because you were drinking too?

57:06 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, because I had a drink.

57:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You had one drink and they dropped the charge?

57:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I had one drink.

57:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That sounds like very questionable behavior by the police, to tell you the truth.

57:15 Drew By the way, counselor, would you have taken that case?

57:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I would take, I would take the case, as a lawyer, I would take the case and sue the police who would not pursue the case. I think that's a gross abuse of their duty. I'm shocked at that. Could you go into the details?

57:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, the DA said that they couldn't do it because his lawyer would tear me apart and I've already went through so much and they didn't want to put me through anymore.

57:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What else have you gone through? You mean because of the rape?

57:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you.

57:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I said, when he said you've been through so much, were there other rapes?

57:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, that was the only one, but what happened was he was like the All-Star Water Polo Team guy and this was in high school and he, you know, I was this way, I was the whore and I'm trying to ruin his career. Wow.

58:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This sounds like one of the worst miscarriages of justice I've ever heard of.

58:15 Drew That sounds also like a bad episode from a sitcom, a TV drama.

58:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, that's really shocking. Did you consider filing a civil case against him?

58:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My mom talked about it, but I just didn't want to go through with it. I just wanted to move on.

58:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So you're not in school, so you were in high school with this kid?

58:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, we went to the same high school and my mom took me out and put me in a private school.

58:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I just think this story really offends me very much. I think you were very badly mistreated. I'm very upset about it to tell you the truth. I don't like it. I really don't like it. It sounds like you were really, really treated badly.

58:52 Drew Did this guy force you to have oral sex with him, the rape?

58:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no.

58:57 Drew Oral sex wasn't involved. Does oral sex feel like you're being forced into it in the way you were forced into the rape? Is it reminiscent in some way?

59:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Sometimes.

59:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Maybe it has to do with not wanting to actually see the male body part that did the raping and see it up close and personal when you know that's the part that violated you and that's upsetting you.

59:22 Drew And the mouth is sort of an outlet for aggression too and you kind of feel like, you know, you don't feel right. You feel like fighting it. Well, you might. Or whatever. Just as it feels incongruous, you're feeling all these aggressive feelings about the horrible dude.

59:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You know, I don't think you have to feel bad about it. I would just say to your boyfriend, look, I mean, I'm doing you and what...

59:44 Drew That's good enough.

59:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm doing you. That's good enough. Let's just take it slow and easy and we'll work it out and we'll try to explore what the problem is and we'll get through it. But please try to be patient with me. I've had a lot of brutal things happen to me.

1:00:01 Drew Does he know that? Does he know those things happen to you?

1:00:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, he knows that because I've been through a lot in the past few years because I have an addiction.

1:00:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What's your addiction?

1:00:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Mass coke and heroin.

1:00:14 Drew Oh, whoa.

1:00:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Anything else?

1:00:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Whoa.

1:00:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, but I've been clean for almost 10 months.

1:00:19 Drew Okay.

1:00:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you in the program?

1:00:21 Drew Yeah.

1:00:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, I am.

1:00:22 Drew Okay, you need to go. That is paramount. Nothing else matters, okay? All of those we've been talking about pales by comparison with your heroin addiction.

1:00:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I must, must, must know, do you mean to tell me that in Laguna Beach, one of the more affluent communities in California, kids are using meth?

1:00:40 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, yeah.

1:00:41 Drew Oh, man, are you kidding?

1:00:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We have something else to do.

1:00:45 Drew I treat that.

1:00:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay There's nothing else to do. Well, you seem to be having sex. That's something else to do.

1:00:49 Drew I'm not going to name institutions, but I consult at the institutions in and around Los Angeles area, and they have at the highest level institutions, huge problems of methamphetamine.

1:00:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That stuns me. I am really, really shocked at that. Well, I would like to say that if you go into the 12-step program in a wholehearted, enthusiastic way, and really, really, really turn your will and your life over to God, and really, really do ask him to find the answers for you in your heart, you will get to the point where either you're comfortable doing it, or you're comfortable not doing it. And you'll just be comfortable, period.

1:01:22 Drew And that'll be that, yes.

1:01:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You'll be comfortable, period.

1:01:25 Drew Tiffany, please just talk to your sponsor every day, go to meetings every day, and focus on that, okay?

1:01:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And don't get high. Go to lots of meetings, and don't get high between meetings.

1:01:33 Drew Now, the way you said that, Ben, it leads me to conclude that you know lots of recovering people, because you've seen people go from caught in their disease to how comfortable they become.

1:01:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm a recovering person myself.

1:01:44 Drew Oh, well, there you go. So, but it's a different feeling in recovery.

1:01:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay The feeling of being in the program is the best feeling there is. It's an unbelievably great feeling.

1:01:56 Drew Okay, let's see. I have an interesting question. If sex addiction equals abuse, then what about people who don't have sex? All right, do you want? Yeah, I'm going to take that.

1:02:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, it's too complicated. That sounds like some French existentialist question.

1:02:08 Drew We're going to talk to Sartre tonight. Brad, fifteen.

1:02:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why do we keep going to these boys?

1:02:14 Drew Well, because we got to have some males in here. We'll have one so far, Ben.

1:02:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay All right, Brad. Sorry if I started out nervous as hell here.

1:02:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Don't be nervous. We're your friends.

1:02:27 Drew Even though Ben doesn't want to talk to you.

1:02:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I do want to talk to him. I do want to talk to him. Go ahead, Brad. We're listening very intently.

1:02:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My girlfriend's parents, which they're her guardians, because it's her aunt and her uncle, are literally, they do not want me near her for any reason. They forced her to break up with me.

1:02:48 Drew How old is she?

1:02:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She is 15 as of like, I believe, 13 days ago.

1:02:54 Drew All right.

1:02:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What happened?

1:02:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why don't they like you, Brad?

1:02:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I made a very foolish decision. I went to her house, like, because my parents were out in Laughlin, and, you know, parents are gone. I'm going to do what I want. So I leave the house and I go to her house instead, and her parents don't know anything about it. So I'm with her. We go to her bedroom. Nothing happened. We just like we're sitting there in the bed. I was hugging her, because I'm that kind of person. We're watching TV. Her aunt walks in, kind of glares at me. So we have to go to the living room. And basically, I made a really bad impression at first. And then my parents came home that day, and I was still there. And they called me up and yelled at me, and I turned my phone off, because I was upset with them.

1:03:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My son does that all the time.

1:03:43 Drew Would you leave your son alone, Ben?

1:03:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My son is a very, very good boy. So I'm just pointing out that the fact that someone does that doesn't make him a bad boy. My son's a good boy, and he does that all the time. 18.

1:03:54 Drew 18.

1:03:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, go ahead.

1:03:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My parents actually somehow found where I was, picked me up and took me home, which since I disrespected Allora's Guardians, which that's her name, Allora, by...

1:04:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Is that her first name?

1:04:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, Allora is her first name. I defied her, my parents, in their house. It's a major show of disrespect, which I understand. And then the very next day, me and Allora decided to start dating, and she came to my house, just cause she didn't want to go home yet. So she came to my house, we talked about it, and we kinda got all the details worked out, cause we knew that her parents were not gonna be happy with me.

1:04:40 Drew Got the picture, we're now get to the point.

1:04:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you have sex with her?

1:04:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I did not.

1:04:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, so what happened? Have you ever had sex with her?

1:04:46 Drew Huh?

1:04:47 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Have you ever had sex with her?

1:04:48 Drew That's a yes.

1:04:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, not at all.

1:04:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, it sounds to me like you're behaving very respectfully. I don't get it, what's the problem?

1:04:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't get it either, but what I need to know is how would I regain any small amount of trust with her parents? Because at this point, they want to move her to a different school to get her away from me. Wow.

1:05:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I would write them a letter and I would say, Dear Mr. and Mrs. Jones or whatever their name is, I know I made a bad impression on you. I'm terribly, terribly sorry. It means more than anything else in my life right now to make that impression better. Please tell me anything I can do, whatever it is, I will try to do it if it's within my power. And I totally apologize for whatever I've done in the past. And please be in touch with me. I want to be respectful to you. I do respect you. And I would like to get that across to you.

1:05:40 Drew I hope you're recording this. You grovel like that. But Ben, one question I have, in addition to apologizing like that, is there anything we should know about you that they're reacting to? Do you have tats? Do you have long hair? Do you present yourself in a way that makes them frightened? Do you have a reputation in town? What's going on?

1:05:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I had no rep... I have... Well, I do have a reputation, but it's not really that bad of one.

1:05:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What kind of... What's the reputation for?

1:06:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I have like anger issues sometimes.

1:06:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Have you ever been in a lot of fights?

1:06:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, I've been in a lot of fights, but...

1:06:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Have you ever been in jail?

1:06:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay For three years. No, never in jail.

1:06:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You haven't been in a fight since you were 12?

1:06:16 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

1:06:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I don't think they can hold that against you if you were 12 years old.

1:06:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I've been trying to stay out of fights. I nearly got one recently, but stupid pressure.

1:06:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where do you live?

1:06:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So, I had long hair, and it was kind of like covered my eyes and what not.

1:06:34 Drew All right, so clean up your act, Brad. He's a punk. He said he's a punk.

1:06:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You know, Dr. Drew is making a very good point, Brad. I think if you actually made yourself look better, changed your appearance so that you started looking like an Ivy Leaguer, looking like a straight shooter, then I bet they'd start respecting your authority at all.

1:06:54 Drew Walk the walk a little bit. And then also, I hope you record everything Ben said because that will get through to them. Ben Stein in here tonight. The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. We're going to talk to somebody after the break who wants to thank Ben for bringing up University of California Santa Cruz. So, we will talk to them. We'll talk to them. In the meantime, I want everyone to run to Amazon and order either or all of How to Ruin Your Sex Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life.

1:07:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know anything about sex life.

1:07:19 Drew How to Ruin Your Love Life, Your Love Life, Your Life, and Your Financial Life.

1:07:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Right.

1:07:24 Drew And I love the idea of that being a little trilogy that you can buy from people.

1:07:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, thank you, Dr. Drew. Praise from Caesar is praise indeed.

1:07:32 Drew God bless you. This is 1-800-LOVE-191 and we'll return with Ben Stein. That's right, it's Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191. Ben Stein in studio. We're hawking books tonight. How to Ruin Your Life, Ruin Your Love Life, Ruin Your Financial Life. Get that trilogy. Modern Day Hobbit, I tell you.

1:07:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, better.

1:07:50 Drew Better. Hey, you know, people don't know or may not remember that I was on your show Turn Ben Stein On.

1:07:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes, I remember you doing very good. I have a photo of you in my study.

1:08:01 Drew Oh, no kidding. And we still have a tape of singing on your show. Here it is. Remember this?

1:08:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, yes, yes. I had forgotten that you're an operatic singer.

1:08:20 Drew That's good, you did sing. It was the only time I've ever sung publicly, at least on the media.

1:08:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You did fabulously well. I'm very impressed, Dr. Drew.

1:08:28 Drew You gave me that great pianist.

1:08:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It worked out.

1:08:30 Drew I think that was awesome. You did great. All right, enough of that. Enough.

1:08:36 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, enough.

1:08:37 Drew Dr. Drew in the hissy. Thank you. Ooh, here's somebody who says we gave horrible advice. You want to take that one?

1:08:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, my gosh.

1:08:46 Drew Let's first talk to Ben, Carly rather, who's a junior at the University of California, Santa Cruz. Carly?

1:08:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm a junior, actually.

1:08:54 Drew What did I say?

1:08:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Sophomore.

1:08:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's okay, though.

1:08:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think you said a junior. What college are you?

1:08:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You both. You're both pimp. Anyways, I was at Kresge back in the day.

1:09:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know Kresge very well.

1:09:05 Caller Yeah.

1:09:06 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I actually got kicked out.

1:09:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why? Was it for the chronic?

1:09:10 Caller It was just a bunch too much partying.

1:09:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay They got really strict at Santa Cruz.

1:09:13 Drew You're kidding. They have a huge heroin problem at Santa Cruz.

1:09:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're kidding.

1:09:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I'm not in housing any longer.

1:09:20 Drew I treated 30 heroin addicts from Santa Cruz.

1:09:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You're kidding.

1:09:24 Drew Yeah.

1:09:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let me tell you what it was like when I used to be a teacher at UC Santa Cruz. Did you know that? I was in Porter. It was then called College Five. We used to have every Friday night, the slip and slides. Do you know about the slip and slides? No.

1:09:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What's that?

1:09:38 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, the dorms there have long, narrow halls and a guy named Larry Wilson would take these big, enormous sheets of plastic and make little river beds in the halls and then he would fill them with warm water and mineral oil and then we would all get naked and slip and slide around in them and then some kids would drop acid and go down to the mud baths down near Big Sur. What?

1:10:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay The cave?

1:10:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, down near, I think they were called the mud baths. I don't know if they're there anymore. Down near Big Sur and watch the sunrise while tripping their brains out.

1:10:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Interesting.

1:10:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, that's why it was there. In those days, when I was there, there was so much reefer being smoked that the dorm would be like in a constant haze of reefer smoke and I was constantly going from room to room telling people to stop smoking the joint and they would put it out and then as soon as I left, they would light it up again. I mean, it was just incredible. Everybody there was high all of the time.

1:10:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Wow, that's weird.

1:10:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know.

1:10:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, actually, that just really spoke to what I was going to ask you is that I know that you, well, what I've heard is that you're conservative.

1:10:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Very. Except where drugs and sex are conserved.

1:10:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But how did you manage to go to Santa Cruz?

1:11:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I didn't go. I was a teacher there, but I was the only Republican there. I was there during the 1972 election, which you don't even dimly remember, and there were 1,497 votes cast for McGovern and three for Nixon. One was me, one was my girlfriend, and one was a Vietnam vet. And after a while, they started persecuting me so much for being a Republican that I left and went back to Washington.

1:11:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, wow.

1:11:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay But I do love it. I was just there less than 10 days ago. I drove up to Porter, walked across the footbridge over to the team in science buildings, walked down the path to McHenry Library, walked up to the art buildings, walked through the drama buildings, walked back to Porter.

1:11:46 Caller Awesome.

1:11:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay At midnight, at midnight, while the full moon streamed down, I had a great time. It was one of the happiest nights of my life.

1:11:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Whoa!

1:11:54 Caller Oh, my God.

1:11:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay All right. Do you have a sex or drug question to ask?

1:11:59 Drew Sorry. Any question, Carly?

1:12:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do you have a sex or drug question?

1:12:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, no, no. No question.

1:12:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay All right. Well, thank you, Carly. You know what's the coolest place in Santa Cruz besides the University of Ome, which is an incredibly good Chinese restaurant?

1:12:12 Caller Where is it?

1:12:14 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's on Bay Street, just northwest of the intersection of Mission and Bay.

1:12:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay. I'll check it out for sure.

1:12:22 Drew Okay.

1:12:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Good. Have fun. Bye-bye.

1:12:24 Drew And this now is, here's Shannon, who has issues with some of the advice we gave. Shannon, 23. Good. What's up?

1:12:31 Caller Hey, yeah. The little kid that, oh, he was sad with his dad or mom or girlfriend, parents or whatever it was.

1:12:40 Drew Yes, yes.

1:12:40 Caller Yeah, and you told him to cut his hair, become Ivy League and whatever. What do you think? The girl liked him for being all punky and he had anger issues and he was all cute and whatever. Now, when he changes and she leaves him for changing into an Ivy League guy, he's going to go crazy and-

1:13:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, no, because he'll still be psycho inside.

1:13:03 Caller Oh, he will. Totally.

1:13:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay So she'll still like him. I mean, she'll know that he's still psycho inside and so she'll still like him. Well, he's 15 too. I mean, he asked us a question, Shannon, how could he improve his appeal to her parents? We answered the question. The answer clearly is not to remain as he is because the parents detest him as he is. So that's not an option. The only option is to change.

1:13:29 Caller It's not going to happen at 15. I liked your idea of a letter. I think that was really sweet. He changes as a parent. She's just like, oh my God, all of a sudden, what is he now? He's an Ivy League little guy and it's no longer fun for her. She's 15. It's all the rebels.

1:13:43 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She hasn't even done him. I mean, for gosh sakes, I mean, she hardly knows him. She can still learn to like him. Even if he's, look, there's many, many, many mass killers look to Ivy League, so she can still like him.

1:13:55 Caller Very true. I think he's just created one.

1:13:58 Drew Do you still, Shannon, have such a-

1:14:00 Caller John Wayne Gacy.

1:14:02 Drew You still have a really mature view of man yourself to this day?

1:14:05 Caller Sure. I think I do.

1:14:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How old are you, Shannon?

1:14:08 Ben Stein – Full episode replay 23.

1:14:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where do you live?

1:14:10 Caller Point Richmond.

1:14:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where's that?

1:14:13 Caller It's in Northern California. Oh.

1:14:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay There are a lot of calls from Northern California.

1:14:20 Caller Yeah, no. It's raining out here tonight. We have nothing else to do.

1:14:23 Drew It could be. It could be that.

1:14:24 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, a lot of you seem to have sex when it's raining, so you could do that.

1:14:28 Caller Oh. You're thinking of sex now? You're in Southern California. You're thinking of politics?

1:14:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We in Southern California think of everything.

1:14:37 Drew But, Shannon, I'm concerned about how you sort of perceive man and the way you think about man.

1:14:41 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah, you think that they have to be bad boys in order to like them. They don't have to be bad.

1:14:44 Caller No, I thought that this 15-year-old girl liked him because he was a bad boy.

1:14:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know, but he can still be a bad boy and look like a good boy. So that way he gets all the bases. He gets the parents to like him.

1:14:58 Drew And by the way, you have a grave misconception, Shannon, about what it means to be a bad boy. The perception, the misperception that young women have is that that's a man that's going to be powerful and protect you, when in fact all that chaos and aggression gets turned on you. That's always the way it plays out. I'm sure you know that, I'm sure you know that if you've been in these relationships.

1:15:18 Caller No, I'm not attracted to bad boys. I just know that what kind of boys are you attracted to? I'm attracted to girls.

1:15:25 Drew Oh, interesting.

1:15:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And you're from Northern California? That is really incredible. Imagine that.

1:15:31 Drew Oh my goodness.

1:15:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Wait a second, you're attracted to girls and you're calling up to yell at us men and you're in Northern California. Something really wacky is going on. I'm going to guess you're a Democrat. Am I right? Am I right about that? Or are you a big...

1:15:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh no, you're probably a huge fan of George Bush.

1:15:47 Caller I'm actually a little exotic in the political arena.

1:15:49 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I bet you're a big fan of George Bush.

1:15:50 Caller I don't vote a straight ticket.

1:15:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I bet you don't vote a straight ticket.

1:15:56 Drew Does your fan want to give her a little talking to?

1:15:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, she's a Democrat. I can't help you.

1:16:00 Drew All right, fair enough. Let's go on then to Melissa who's 27. Hi, Melissa.

1:16:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay My question is, when I have sex, it doesn't do anything for me. I don't get off sexually. I mean, I don't even want to make any noise. I just want to lay there and get it over with. And I want to know what I can do to try to maybe change that. I mean, it's like I don't even have the thought really of even wanting to have sex. I just do it because I'm in a relationship and I know that he wants it even though I don't really want it.

1:16:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let me ask you a question, were you abused as a child?

1:16:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay A lot of what I do remember as a child because I really blocked it out is everything bad. My mother was a meth addict.

1:16:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh my God. Well small wonder you've learned to totally suppress your feelings. It must have been unbearable to have a methadone addict as your mother. I am very sorry. Melissa, is that your name? Yes. I am really sorry. That is a really, really tough, tough road to hoe. I'm very, very sorry.

1:17:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's true. She's still on to this day and she's in her 40s.

1:17:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I am so sorry. Where do you live?

1:17:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I live in Sacramento, California.

1:17:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I am so sorry, Melissa. That is awful.

1:17:22 Drew She also must have been 17 when she had you too.

1:17:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She was about, yeah, I think she had just maybe turned 18. I'm not really sure.

1:17:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Was she married?

1:17:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay She was married to my father. He left when I was little. I guess he wasn't very nice to me anyway. He was always saying that me and my brother weren't his children.

1:17:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, Melissa, you have really been through the mill. I am very, very sorry. That is really, really bad stuff.

1:17:51 Drew Yeah, and when you've been through stuff, it's awful. I'm glad that it's sort of offering you some empathy.

1:17:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm very, very sorry. Do you belong to any kind of group or therapy program where you get support?

1:18:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I've thought about going before, but I feel like a total nut job myself mentally.

1:18:11 Ben Stein – Full episode replay We all do, Melissa.

1:18:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I feel like if I talk about it to somebody, they might go, oh, wow, she's really crazy.

1:18:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, I want to give you a suggestion. You qualify very richly to be a member of Al-Anon, which is an organization for people whose parents or other, someone close to them, doesn't have to be a parent, is an alcoholic or drug addict. And the amount of support you will get and the amount of a comradeship and sharing of people who are telling you that they've been in the same place you're in, will really bring tears to your eyes. And after you've been doing it for a while, you'll feel like you're part of a very, very big fellowship.

1:18:49 Drew And please get a sponsor there and work the steps so you can learn to be close and open with another person. And then with women especially, intimacy is sort of, for many women, a necessary part of feeling sexual. And if you can't tolerate closeness, it's very hard to be sexual. On top of that, if you again can't regulate your emotions, one of the things that gets caught up or sort of disintegrated from your emotional system is your body. And so the body becomes disconnected, you can't feel things, you don't connect up with it, and it's very hard to feel sexual. And so it becomes very important that you do this.

1:19:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay May I ask you a question? I want to ask you a question. This is a serious suggestion, Melissa.

1:19:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay.

1:19:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do you have a dog?

1:19:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No.

1:19:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I recommend-

1:19:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay He's not my cat.

1:19:32 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, cat is the same.

1:19:33 Drew That's a good idea.

1:19:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think you should get a good sized dog, like a German short-haired pointer or a Dalmatian or a- and hug that dog a lot, sleep in bed with that dog. Seriously, lying in bed, hugging the dog and little by little feelings of warmth and able to connect will come to you. I'm not kidding. I'm seriously not kidding.

1:20:02 Drew That's actually good advice.

1:20:04 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm a bit of an obsessive compulsive when it comes to animals. I don't really like them anymore because every animal I had died of some sort of weird illness and I get where I don't like the hair around. It's like I stress I have lint rollers everywhere. I don't like stains on my clothes. I mean, I went through a lot of stuff as a child including being shoved under an oily car because my mother was like chirping out thinking that people were after her and different things like that.

1:20:30 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh God. Melissa, I am so sorry. I am really, really, really sorry. May I ask your occupation?

1:20:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm a truck driver.

1:20:38 Drew Wow.

1:20:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I am really sorry. You have really been through the mill and my heart goes out to you.

1:20:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thanks.

1:20:45 Drew Do something about it Melissa, okay?

1:20:46 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I will think.

1:20:47 Drew You can. You can get better with this. You don't have to suffer with this.

1:20:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Go to the 12 step meetings and then after a while you'll want a dog.

1:20:57 Drew Let's take a break about this one. We've got someone coming up who always hooks up with married men. Like that one, don't you Ben? That's a good one. Addicted to porn, but that's a male. You won't like that Ben. We'll go to the girl that's hooking up with married guys. Ben Stein is in with us tonight. How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life, How to Ruin Your Financial Life, and it says several others. What are your other books? Your other titles?

1:21:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay There's so many. It's insane. If they go to Amazon.

1:21:21 Drew What do you want people to buy?

1:21:22 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't care if they buy it or not. I really don't.

1:21:25 Drew I've actually read your books and they're very funny and very rich and I do recommend them. So I hope people will. In fact, I haven't read all three of them. I have not read How to Ruin Your Financial Life.

1:21:35 Ben Stein – Full episode replay The one that people should get is called Ludes. It's about Quaalude addiction and I think it's a pretty strong book about why people become drug addicts.

1:21:44 Drew Interesting.

1:21:44 Ben Stein – Full episode replay L-U-D-E-S.

1:21:46 Drew 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. It will be right back with Ben Stein. Ben Stein in the studio tonight. Win Ben Stein's money. Turn Ben Stein on. And of course, Ferris Bueller's day off.

1:21:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Plus, I do a commentary on Sunday mornings on CBS.

1:22:00 Drew Oh, no kidding. Now, tell me about that.

1:22:03 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I do that about every third week on CBS Sunday morning with Osgood and...

1:22:09 Drew I love that show.

1:22:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you. I get a tremendous response for that. I also do a commentary on the stock market on Saturday mornings on Fox News.

1:22:18 Drew Excellent. Okay, there you go. I knew you were out there on TV somewhere.

1:22:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yes.

1:22:21 Drew We wouldn't be missing that opportunity.

1:22:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Plus, we've got 10 jillion commercials for Clear Eyes.

1:22:28 Drew And then, you mentioned four other spokesperson jobs that you do.

1:22:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, I have to pay my living. I mean, I...

1:22:33 Drew No, right.

1:22:34 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Earn my living.

1:22:35 Drew It's not like these are horrible products.

1:22:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't want to be a charge on the state. Okay, let's get a call from someone.

1:22:42 Drew Well, they're putting money up for me right now. I want to see if it's a girl. I want to keep you happy tonight. There's a young male we're going to talk to first.

1:22:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let's do it real quick with him.

1:22:51 Drew All right, Connor's 19. Hello? Hey, Connor, what's up?

1:22:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What is it?

1:22:58 I was raped by my dad about six months ago.

1:23:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You were what?

1:23:03 I was raped by my father.

1:23:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh my God, that's horrible.

1:23:07 Drew How did he pull that off with you being a full grown man basically?

1:23:11 Well, he's in the circus, in this vocal circus, and he has this persona, like a clown character he plays that he calls Benny Stufi.

1:23:25 Drew Okay, this is some bogus. This is some bogus thing. Do you want me to let him finish it? Should we let him finish it or do you? No. Okay, that was too wild. All right, now we got somebody named Jody, who was 21. Jody, what's up?

1:23:41 Caller Hi. I was on a dirt bike a couple of weeks ago and I crashed. And I got some really bad road rage, or road rash. And I was just wondering, is it normal to get like an infection, like kind of like a bunch of pimples coming out? I mean, is that a normal infection or is that something else completely or?

1:24:05 Drew Well, if there is infection, that needs to be treated, all right? That means a staph or a strep has gotten into your skin.

1:24:09 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You mean you're having this in your pelvic area?

1:24:12 Caller Actually, no, it's on my back, on my shoulder blade.

1:24:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Why are you calling on Loveline to have a rash on your back?

1:24:19 Drew You have to have a doctor take a look at this. If your abrasion has become infected, that's a very serious thing. You heard of flesh-eating bacteria? That's how that gets going. So you need to go see somebody right now. I mean, like maybe tonight, you have fever or chills or anything like that. Well, hang on, a fever or chills, anything like that?

1:24:37 Caller No, I'm completely fine otherwise.

1:24:39 Drew You feel fine?

1:24:39 Caller It's not red around any of it at all either.

1:24:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think you better go to the doctor right away and have him give you lots of antibiotics.

1:24:46 Drew I agree. Unfortunately, one thing I've learned by doing this show is that people do not understand how to describe rashes. So red dots and all that. Where are these?

1:24:55 Caller It's actually on my back. Basically, it's like a bunch of scrapes and stuff. I was on a dry lake bed.

1:25:02 Drew I understand that you have abrasions on your back, but you called about something that's sort of an epiphenomenon, something that's around that.

1:25:08 Caller Well, it actually, it reminds me of exactly like this, like pimples.

1:25:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Okay, I don't see what this has to do with Loveline's with all due respect, with the greatest possible respect.

1:25:19 Drew It needs to be examined by someone immediately.

1:25:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let's go to the next call.

1:25:22 Drew Apostolic reaction again, that's infection to prove it otherwise.

1:25:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Let's go to the next one.

1:25:26 Drew How are you on the air? Who's this?

1:25:27 Caller Aaron.

1:25:28 Drew Aaron, what's up?

1:25:30 Caller I had this girlfriend for a little while and when she would come over, I'd never get any sleep because we just do it all night.

1:25:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Do the wild thing.

1:25:40 Caller Yeah, after about three or four days of her being here though, the skin below the head of my penis was dry and scaling off.

1:25:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay That happens to me all the time.

1:25:54 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Really?

1:25:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Just kidding.

1:25:57 Drew Your poor wife. Just kidding.

1:26:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Just kidding. Just kidding.

1:26:02 Drew So what's your question?

1:26:04 Caller Well, I'm just wondering what that was because I pretty much, I'm not seeing her now. It just didn't work out. But, and I know she's been to the gynecologist. So I'm wondering, is that just from too frequent or?

1:26:15 Drew Yeah, it's probably basically a burn.

1:26:18 Caller How old are you?

1:26:19 Ben Stein – Full episode replay How old are you? How old are you?

1:26:22 Caller 34.

1:26:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay 34? My God, you have a lot of stamina. What's your job?

1:26:29 Drew You sound 15, by the way.

1:26:32 Caller Thanks. What's your job? I work with reptiles. I work for a herpetologist.

1:26:40 Drew Doing what?

1:26:42 Caller I clean them and feed them and just basically haul them around to schools and he runs a nitty-gritty program.

1:26:50 Drew This is Lemony Snicket right here. This is him.

1:26:52 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This is amazing. How old is the girlfriend?

1:26:57 Caller She's 30.

1:26:59 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't know what... I don't see what the problem is here. I mean, you might have an infection. You should see a doctor. Yes.

1:27:06 Drew You need somebody to look at it.

1:27:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I think you should be very, very grateful that you have such incredible sexual stamina.

1:27:13 Drew I guess maybe acting is sounding and acting and living like a teenager. You keep the physiology going. Laura, 18.

1:27:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hello.

1:27:21 Drew Hey, Laura.

1:27:21 Ben Stein – Full episode replay What's up? How are you?

1:27:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm good. How are you?

1:27:25 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Good.

1:27:25 Drew We're great.

1:27:27 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I've recently been with a couple of guys and all three have had the same problem and that is that while we were doing stuff, be it sex or just fooling around with clothes on, they've lost their erection. I can't help but think it's me. They've all told me that they're used to having sex with condoms or to sex without condoms and condoms are like preventing them from maintaining their erections.

1:27:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I don't think they're lying. I will just tell you since I'm older than Dr. Drew. How old are you, Dr. Drew?

1:28:04 Drew 47.

1:28:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm 13 years older than, 14 years older than Dr. Drew. That it is a commonplace among men that condoms are, are, make them lose their erection and I know that they're incredibly important for the prevention of sexual disease but these guys are not lying when they're telling you that condoms take away their erection. This is not true for all men but it is a commonplace and it's, I don't think they're lying to you.

1:28:30 Drew I actually tell those men because there are those guys that have this effect that they need to first of all practice putting condoms on because sometimes just the fact of stopping the rhythm of the flow of sex is enough to create a guy, cause a guy to lose erection so you got to practice putting them on quickly but also masturbate with it on so you get used to the feeling of it and really start to understand how you know what kind of stimulation needs in order to reach climax with a condom on because it is something that guys need as you know you they aren't going to have sex with you unless they have a condom on right?

1:29:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Is there something going on there? Are you like saying something to upset them like get that condom on you loser or something like that?

1:29:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Definitely not.

1:29:10 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Are you being nice and friendly to them while you are doing the wild thing?

1:29:13 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Most definitely.

1:29:15 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And then they suddenly say I'm really sorry but...

1:29:18 Ben Stein – Full episode replay You know, it's even in two of the occasions, you know, sex has gotten underway and then all of a sudden, you know, switch of position or something and it's...

1:29:28 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, well, you know, you shouldn't... I wouldn't switch positions. I think that's a mistake. Why did you feel you had to switch positions?

1:29:35 Drew I beg to differ. But anyway...

1:29:37 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Maybe just to increase the pleasure for myself.

1:29:39 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Ah, see, that's where you're being selfish.

1:29:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, okay.

1:29:43 Drew Do you have orgasm with intercourse?

1:29:45 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm sorry?

1:29:46 Drew Are you able to have orgasm with intercourse?

1:29:48 Ben Stein – Full episode replay No, actually, I'm not. I kind of learned that from you guys. I deal with it, but certain positions do feel better than others.

1:29:54 Drew You're fat.

1:29:55 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Well, why don't you try this? Why don't you not ask them to change positions? Just wait till they have reached their climax.

1:30:05 Drew Yeah.

1:30:05 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And then have them play with you till you come, and then you'll be all set, and they'll be all set.

1:30:12 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Sounds like a plan. And I'm definitely going to suggest the as an astrobating thing. Thank you guys. Yeah.

1:30:17 Drew Yeah. I think that's a good idea for guys. Yeah. And practice putting them on drilling. Drill putting the thing on. I mean, that's really what the guys need to do. The whole business of the thing.

1:30:26 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Have a buzzer go off three times, like a fire drill.

1:30:30 Drew No, a fire...

1:30:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Put it on the condom.

1:30:32 Drew Fire bell.

1:30:33 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Yeah.

1:30:33 Drew They have to jump down a pole, and put the thing on, go back. No, I think it's just something that guys need to sort of dive, dive, dive, like that.

1:30:42 Ben Stein – Full episode replay A klaxon sound.

1:30:44 Drew But they got to actually practice this, because it is such an important thing, and it's just to cop out on it and say, well, it's not for me. Where do you live? Me? Oh, Laura.

1:30:53 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I know her.

1:30:56 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where do you live, Laura?

1:30:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Hello?

1:30:58 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Where do you live?

1:31:00 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I'm in the San Fernando Valley.

1:31:02 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, okay. Fine. For sure. For sure.

1:31:05 Drew Yes. She doesn't know what that means, but I do.

1:31:07 Ben Stein – Full episode replay All right. Thank you, Laura.

1:31:09 Drew All right, Ben. We got to take yet another break. Ben Stein with us tonight. The trilogy of How to Ruin Your Life, How to Ruin Your Love Life, How to Ruin Your Financial Life are the must haves for Christmas this year. So go to Amazon or Barnes and Noble. You can also check out more about Ben at www.benstein.com. Look for him on CBS Sunday morning, CBS Sunday morning, and also on Fox News.

1:31:29 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I was just on this past Sunday. I won't be on for a couple of weeks now.

1:31:32 Drew Look for him on that show. That's a good show. We'll be right back. Well, Ben, that about does it for Loveline. Thank you very much.

1:31:50 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Oh, I don't want it to be-

1:31:52 Drew Well, why don't you come back? Let's bring you right back. I would love to have you back soon and maybe spend a few nights with us. It'd be fun.

1:31:57 Ben Stein – Full episode replay I would love to do that.

1:31:59 Drew Excellent. So thank you so much for coming out at night.

1:32:01 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Thank you, Dr. Drew.

1:32:02 Drew I hope Loveline listeners will all show him a little love and buy some of his books because they're well worth the investment both of time and money. They really are. They're really quite full of wisdom. And so I have to say good night at this point, Ben, and it's been good spending time with you.

1:32:17 Ben Stein – Full episode replay It's been a pleasure.

1:32:18 Drew Thank you to you. And I appreciate that.

1:32:20 Ben Stein – Full episode replay And good luck.

1:32:21 Drew And good night and stay well.

1:32:23 Ben Stein – Full episode replay Did you smoke The Chronic? What did you smoke? The Chronic? Huh? Did he have a good stash?

1:32:31 Ben Stein – Full episode replay This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or the station. The producer for Loveline is Aningold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Monday, December 12, 2005