0:16
Voiceover
1-800-LOVE-191 Love Line starts now.
0:21
Voiceover
1-800-LOVE-191. I'm Dr. Drew and I'm delighted to welcome into the studio tonight, the one and only Andy Milonakis.
0:29
Andy Milonakis
Hello, sir.
0:30
Drew
What can I call you, Andy Milonakis?
0:32
Andy Milonakis
You can call me whatever you want. Call me little white boy.
0:35
Drew
Little white boy. And then we were talking a bit off the air. You grew up in Queens, right?
0:41
Andy Milonakis
Close, Westchester, but I lived in the story.
0:44
Drew
You lived in Queens. I see, you lived in Queens for a while. And when you were in Queens, you were a computer.
0:48
Andy Milonakis
I was a computer geek. Geek. Yeah, I fixed computers and I was a button pusher and I fixed networks and all that geeky stuff.
0:57
Drew
But now you learned computers, you said, in junior college at first. Except that sucked. So you went to technical school.
1:05
Andy Milonakis
I did, I did. I went to technical school and I learned how to geek out.
1:09
Drew
And then you became a successful computer operator, right? I mean, what do you call that? Technical consultant or information manager?
1:16
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, just like IT person, IT geek.
1:19
Drew
And then how did that go from that to MTV? Give us that little history.
1:23
Andy Milonakis
Well, I created a really stupid bunch of videos. My friend Brian Lynch, he did this website called Angry Naked Pat.
1:33
Drew
What is it?
1:33
Andy Milonakis
Angry Naked Pat. He did this like comic strip and these flash animated series. And he gave me my own little section of the website where I just created a bunch of weird videos with my video camera. And I do a couple of them every week. And after a couple of years, one of them called the Super Bowls Gay just started circulating around the internet and radio stations started playing. And then eventually got into the hands of young Jimmy Kimmel, who wanted to be my daddy and I let him.
2:09
Drew
And he aired the video on his show.
2:11
Andy Milonakis
He aired the video on his show and then he started airing a bunch of my other internet videos on his show. And then he basically, he asked me to do a correspondent tape for him. So I went around Manhattan harassing people and I sent him the video tape. And then he hired me to do field pieces for Jimmy Kimmel Live. And I basically just moved out to LA. And after doing that for about a year, half a year, we kind of came up with the idea of a show based on my internet videos. Just to totally have a more weird, weird approach instead of me doing just field pieces. He wanted to do the same type of stuff I did on the internet.
2:53
Drew
Now, the lyrics for The Super Bowl is Gay?
2:58
Andy Milonakis
It's a very annoying song. It basically just calls everything gay a bunch of times.
3:03
Drew
The Super Bowl especially.
3:04
Andy Milonakis
The Super Bowl is gay, yeah.
3:06
Drew
And then, now when you go out and you still do the show, it's going to be on MTV2 this time around, right?
3:11
Andy Milonakis
It's on MTV2, yeah.
3:12
Drew
Does it have a time on a date and that kind of thing yet?
3:15
Andy Milonakis
It's probably going to be on Fridays, on Sick and Fridays. I think it's going to air next to Wonder Shows. I'm not sure exactly the time.
3:24
Drew
Is Season 1 still on MTV proper?
3:27
Andy Milonakis
I don't know if the reruns are playing on MTV regular right now. It just got launched in the UK. They're starting Season 1 and on MTV 2 they play reruns all the time.
3:38
Drew
My kids love, my boys in particular love the show.
3:41
Andy Milonakis
Yes.
3:41
Drew
In a way, you sort of define that difference between male and female humor. You know what I mean? Your little bit of the Three Stooges element there and that my wife vomits when the Three Stooges, when kids are watching Three Stooges, can't handle fart humor and doesn't quite get Andy Milonakis. Boys are totally into it. They just love you.
4:00
Andy Milonakis
Is that accurate?
4:01
Drew
It's true.
4:01
Andy Milonakis
Even though I'm kind of against fart humor too. It's a weird pet peeve because I could say the grossest, grossest things in the world, but when it comes to fart jokes, I'm not a big fan.
4:13
Drew
Not into fart jokes?
4:14
Andy Milonakis
No. It's a weird thing.
4:16
Drew
It is a weird thing. I think you'd be very into that.
4:18
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
4:18
Drew
Are you into like sight humor or gag humor?
4:21
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. When movies rely on it, totally it's kind of boring to me, but if it's done right, I like good spit-taker, pretful.
4:32
Drew
Now that you're popular, when you go out on the street, is it different?
4:38
Andy Milonakis
It's different because I have a warm feeling inside.
4:40
Drew
No. I mean, aside from the fact that you can spend money, as you please, at those little stores we hassle the people, do they recognize you and sort of out you, or do people gather to watch it?
4:50
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, the kids gather to watch it. It's kind of cute. Like, a bunch of kids are following us.
4:55
Drew
Do you incorporate them into the shooting at all?
4:57
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. We had them all, they all sang the theme song. There was like ten of them outside, and they were all singing the theme song. They were like eight years old, and they knew the words.
5:09
Drew
I saw a bunch of people with peas on their head this Halloween, by the way.
5:13
Andy Milonakis
Really? No, you didn't.
5:14
Drew
Yes, I did.
5:15
Andy Milonakis
Really?
5:15
Drew
Yes, I did. They're not a bunch. More than you'd expect, which is like three.
5:20
Andy Milonakis
Well, that's kind of crazy.
5:22
Drew
That is kind of crazy. All right, let's take some calls. How about that?
5:25
Andy Milonakis
Super.
5:26
Drew
Okay, 1-800-LOVE-191. Andy Milonakis in here helping out as our co-host. And this is Tom, who is 27. Tom? Good morning.
5:35
Andy Milonakis
Dr. Drew, how you doing?
5:36
Drew
Hey, Tom, what's up?
5:38
Andy Milonakis
Hey, I just, I've heard people on your show that come on, they say they got some strange things going on. They're just wondering if, if other people, I don't know, kind of have the same thing. I wanted to ask you if it's normal that I'm aroused by women doing like what I consider to be demeaning things, like I might see pictures of women like cleaning the toilet or something. You know what I mean? I kind of get aroused by that. Is that strange? Is it a male dominance thing or what?
6:02
Drew
Andy?
6:04
Andy Milonakis
Well, if it's strange, then I'm kind of with you.
6:07
Drew
Oh, you're into that too?
6:09
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm not into that actually.
6:10
Drew
They don't have to be naked or anything. They just have to be doing to me.
6:13
Andy Milonakis
Oh, doing to me.
6:14
Andy Milonakis
Like, hey, I'm still down with that. And when I was younger, there would be like pornography where it's girls getting slapped or whatever and I didn't dig it. But now I'm getting older, kind of starting to feel it a little bit.
6:25
Andy Milonakis
Maybe you want to have the upper hand.
6:28
Drew
I actually think that's where the impulse to have anal sex comes from, is this same sort of a feeling about women. Do you think about that, Tom?
6:39
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I guess, maybe, like, I don't know, the other day I saw in a magazine, there was a picture of a girl eating dog food.
6:49
Drew
Eating dog food?
6:50
Andy Milonakis
It was amazing, yeah.
6:52
Drew
That got you off. Well, it does have a fetishistic quality to it, right? It's people doing demeaning things. I've heard of people being into women squishing bugs. I've heard of people being into women, sort of, in past, obviously, impassive or submissive situations. And I happen to believe that when I talk to guys that's sort of into this stuff, they also seem to like the anal sex thing. And it seems like that's where that impulse comes from. And why women would sort of cooperate with that is hard for me to understand.
7:20
Andy Milonakis
Well, how do you treat women? I mean, do you demean women?
7:23
Andy Milonakis
Cave men like dragging the women around by their hair, maybe the same sort of thing, you know?
7:28
Andy Milonakis
Do you do that to women, though?
7:30
Andy Milonakis
I haven't tried it, but I think it would, you know, that would probably get me off.
7:33
Andy Milonakis
I mean, when you talk to women, though, do you belittle them and act like they're nothing?
7:38
Drew
When you're in a relationship, can you be respectful?
7:42
Andy Milonakis
You know, I used to be. And I've kind of gotten away from that, because I've found that, in all honesty, they say nice guys finish last. I think that's the truth. And I think if, you know what I mean, if, you know, as soon as you tell women that you love them, you know, they get fat. So you got to keep them in line.
8:01
Drew
Well, all right. That's one man's opinion, I guess. But I think that sometimes people project what they want to believe in other people. I remember talking to a guy that was a pimp once, and he was on an Internet broadcast I did. And he insisted that the women, his women that were his business, is the prostitutes, that they wanted to be beaten by him. That that was their wish. He's projecting this. No, that's, you don't understand. He was so clear that you don't understand. They're asking for this. They want this. They need this. And I thought, no, I'm not sure. William 20.
8:34
Hey, how's it going?
8:35
Drew
We're good. What's happening?
8:37
Yeah, I was just curious. How come every time I have sex with a girl, it doesn't matter how long I've known her for, she could have been my friend for a long time. Like during sex, after it's going on for a while, I just lose respect for the girl, like in the middle of it. And it's not like I can help it. Like, I don't want to. And it's not like a cool thing or anything. It's just like, you know, I'm not trying to get them in bed or anything. It's a mutual attraction. I'm not like a sleaze bag or anything. But then during it, I'll just like start to lose respect, mainly when I'm doing them from behind.
9:10
Drew
Seriously?
9:11
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
9:13
And it's like, I don't want them to happen.
9:15
Andy Milonakis
The grosser they are in the bed, is it like the grosser they are, the nastier they get, the more respect you lose for them. Like if they, you know, if you just have regular sexual there and it's like you're making love to the girl, it's not so bad. But like if you kind of treat her like a little bitch, then you know, then you think she might think of her as like a dirty, like.
9:40
Yeah, I know what you mean, but it's more, it's not like, you know, the girl can be like hot. It doesn't matter about her being hot. But it's like, it's more like a girl that I just don't love, you know, even if I haven't, even if I've known for a long time.
9:53
Drew
You know, listen, I think there's two reasons that guys get this way. One is there are men that have difficulty seeing women being sexual. It freaks them out. They don't like it when women have sexuality. I think there's a deep part of certain, really in our culture even, and certainly in many men, that they have to control female sexuality. They're scared by it. They're kind of freaked out by it. And so just seeing a woman being sexual is something that you immediately go, you turn off too. Well, that's one possibility.
10:21
Just during sex really. It's just like, I mean, That's what I'm saying.
10:25
Drew
The other possibility is that you sort of have that syndrome, as Woody Allen and as Groucho Marx says, because you'd never want to be a member of a club that would have you as a member. The fact that she's having sex with you means that she must not be worthwhile. And that's kind of a position of envy. And when you conquered her, it's like, she's diminished by that, because, well, now it's not worth it anymore. She actually allowed you to do this to her. So and sometimes it's a mix of the two.
10:53
I think the latter, the one you just said, actually is kind of dead on.
10:57
Drew
And you're 20, you're 20, and that does tend to happen. You know, some of that is even biologically driven from testosterone. Andy, have you ever had that feeling toward the girl?
11:05
Andy Milonakis
Well, I just, I think, like, not really in that same situation, but like a girl that seems cool and seems like not like regular, trashy, slutty girl who seems like really cool, you get to know her a little bit. And then all of a sudden you see her in a different light, like she's out drunk at some bar, just like making out with a couple of dudes and just like dancing on the bar. And then you're just like, you're kind of, you know, your image of her is kind of like, you're just like, wow.
11:35
Drew
Is that kind of thing by the William, too?
11:37
No, it's just it's just really like more like just doing them from behind.
11:42
Like it's like that particular doggy style.
11:46
Andy Milonakis
So don't do them from behind.
11:47
Drew
Why don't you stop doing that?
11:48
Andy Milonakis
You're the missionary.
11:49
Drew
If that image freaks you out, don't do that. That's the best?
11:52
Well, it feels it feels the best and they seem to like it the best, but like, I don't know. It's kind of like a conundrum. Like the better it feels, the more I do it, the more respect I'll lose from them. And after sex, I don't want to be that guy that's like, oh yeah, get out of my bed. I don't want to like hang out with you anymore because I don't like, you know, I'm a nice guy. But it just like, you know, it just feels like it's just natural. Like that's just what happens.
12:12
Andy Milonakis
And now I'm starting to think it's dirtier in your mind to picture doing a girl from behind and just like having sweet, regular missionaries, like, you know, like it's like a dirtier picture. So like maybe just by doing this thing that seems like dirty, do you import like something you'd see in a porno, even though, you know, doing a girl from behind is quite natural. Let me tell you, young man. But it's, you know, I don't know. I think maybe you think of it as a dirtier thing. Like who is this dirty girl who's letting me do this to her?
12:45
Drew
And not only that, it sounds like you get swept into it. It's something you kind of don't want to do because you know it's going to have a bad image and yet you can't help yourself. Why don't you hold back on that a little bit and see if you can do something.
12:55
Andy Milonakis
What if she rides you with like a mask on and a gag in her mouth?
13:00
I could give that a shot, I guess.
13:01
Drew
Yeah, you tell her that that was Andy's advice, particularly. That wasn't your idea, William, as Andy Milonakis said.
13:06
Andy Milonakis
I tell her to say my name next time you guys have sex.
13:09
Drew
Andy, how do you keep looking so young? How does it work? Have you always looked this age?
13:14
Andy Milonakis
I use pearl cream.
13:16
Drew
Pearl cream?
13:17
Andy Milonakis
Pearl.
13:17
Drew
Pearl cream?
13:18
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, yeah.
13:19
Drew
What's that?
13:19
Andy Milonakis
It's five easy payments of $29.99.
13:23
Drew
And what did you put in your scan? It sounds disgusting, whatever it is.
13:26
Andy Milonakis
I swallow it while doing Girls From Behind.
13:28
Drew
Nice. That's nice.
13:30
Andy Milonakis
And then I lose respect for them.
13:32
Drew
Funny, I was losing respect for you just with that image. It was burned into my soul for a second there. All right, this now is Ryan, who's 24. Ryan?
13:40
Andy Milonakis
I'm coming in. Hang up. Hello?
13:41
Drew
Ryan? There we are.
13:43
What's up? How are you doing?
13:45
Drew
Hey, Ryan. What's going on?
13:46
Andy Milonakis
I'm just calling in. Who's this?
13:49
Drew
It's Dr. Drew and Andy Milonakis on Loveline.
13:51
Andy Milonakis
Hey, what's up, guys? How are you doing?
13:53
Andy Milonakis
We're good.
13:54
Drew
What's up?
13:55
Andy Milonakis
Just chilling, dude. I had a question for you, Dr. Drew. Basically, I've been on Narcos for the past, I'd say, two years now.
14:04
Drew
Nice.
14:06
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. Basically, me, it started off, I started taking them a little bit. I used to play football in high school and I just take them to party with a little bit. Then I started taking them to work and now, dude, I just find like I have to take 10 a day and it's affecting my life. I just waste all my money on it.
14:26
Drew
Well, Narco is the same thing as Vicodin, which is an opiate, which is heroin, basically, you take it by mouth instead of by shot. It's the most serious form of addiction, the most difficult to treat, the most time-consuming, requires the biggest commitment and there's unfortunately no easy way with this one.
14:46
Andy Milonakis
I'm sorry, I went to Mexico and I bought tranquilizers and I even put myself out for like four days one time.
14:53
Drew
Right, and as you found, coming off the drug has nothing to do with it. Because once you detox and come off it, you will still go back because it changes your brain permanently and it leaves you with a deep sense of longing and grief that you know is relieved by taking the drug and it drives you back to the drug and that is now going to be with you the rest of your life. That is what addiction is, yes. And so unless you focus on some treatment, which will take at least three months, this is not going to change. Do not waste your money on a rapid detox, do not focus on detox because that's not the problem. The problem is the addictive process. Anyone can get you off Norco in about five days. It's simple. Go to any doctor with any experience of addiction, it's a piece of cake. And they can even do as an outpatient now with something called subutex or buprenorphine. But staying off the drug is a totally different issue. That takes a long time in a structured environment. You're literally going to have to go somewhere for a while, you know, like a sober living or a hospital in order to overcome this. And I know it seems like, hey, what's the big deal? I just have been taking this stuff. I was originally just parting with it. You are now addicted to Norco. And once you are addicted, that's not something that you can control any longer. It's something that has control over you. And it just has to do what it does.
16:03
Andy Milonakis
You're addicted to that. You know, like, when you get fully sober, even if it's off a drug, then you can't drink anymore either. Is that, in this case, if it's just like addicted to a pill for a few months, I mean, if you get sober, is that, I mean, can you no longer drink?
16:20
Drew
Right. Unfortunately, that once you sort of activate that process, that brain disease we call addiction, it's in a part of the brain called the medial forebrain bundle, that is active and becomes reawakened by anything that massages that part of the brain. So, let's say you're an amphetamine addict, pot, alcohol, Valium-like drugs, Norco-like drugs, they will all activate that same system. So, you can no longer use things that cross over into that system. So, anything that people could get addicted to can no longer be used or you will reawaken the whole process. It may not happen instantly, but it will happen inevitably that you will be back on your drug of choice. Mark 27. Hey, Mark.
17:00
Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I was trying to turn the radio off.
17:03
Drew
What's going on?
17:05
Yeah, I'm with this girl and...
17:07
Drew
Hey, before you talk about your girlfriend, hang on one second. Just want to reset the show a little bit here. It's Andy Milonakis on Loveline. The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191. Phone lines are open. We got lots of available lines tonight. So do call in and let's get you on the air.
17:23
Word.
17:23
Drew
Mark, what's up?
17:25
Yeah, like I said, I'm dating a girl and we've been together about almost two years and basically she goes out with her friends. As long as she's not cheating, I don't have a problem with it. But she turns her cell phone off and I ask her what they did. They're like, she's like, I say, what did you do? And she's like, well, we just went out to Jamie's place or Jody's place. So these are girls she works with. And we just hung out and we just talked and drank a bottle of wine.
17:59
Drew
And what kind of work does she do?
18:02
She works for a retail store. Can I say the store name?
18:05
Drew
No, no, not necessarily. No, no, no.
18:06
Okay.
18:07
Drew
Well, go ahead. Why not? Why not?
18:10
Andy Milonakis
Living on the edge.
18:11
Drew
What about the Gap?
18:13
No, actually, it's their arrival of Gap Kids. She works for Jim Burry.
18:18
Drew
Jim Burry.
18:19
Andy Milonakis
Jim Burry, the best store name ever invented.
18:21
Drew
Fashion Island or South Coast Plaza?
18:24
Near South Coast Plaza, main place.
18:28
Drew
Fair enough. All right.
18:29
Yeah, it's in Santa Ana.
18:31
Drew
Fair enough. So she's hanging out. We don't know where she is. She's being elusive. She's being secretive.
18:37
Yeah.
18:37
Drew
All bad signs.
18:38
Not that she's really being secretive. I mean, because I ask her and she tells me something. It's not like she's like, I don't want to tell you or don't worry about her or anything like that. But I try to call her.
18:51
Drew
Mark, she gives you no answer. Hey, we're just hanging out talking. What's the big deal? That's not an answer. It's not an answer. It's not an explanation for why you turn your phone off. That's not an explanation.
19:05
Andy Milonakis
Put your foot down, boy.
19:07
Drew
Mark, the explanation is, are you doing drugs? Are you drunk? Am I being too intrusive? Am I? But here's the deal. Am I bothering you when I try to call? Is that a problem? Do we have a problem?
19:17
Andy Milonakis
Are you personally bothering him?
19:20
Drew
Me personally?
19:20
Yeah.
19:21
Drew
I may be. What's her name?
19:24
Actually, I've never called before, and so I didn't know. I thought I'd maybe talk to one person and then Dr. Drew or whatever.
19:34
Drew
No, no, Mark. This is Dr. Drew. This is who you're talking to. That's my point, is that you have to find out what it is that's motivating her to shut her phone off. The fact that she gives you some BS answer that is not an answer, that vaguely describes what she did during that evening, does not explain why she took her phone off the line. Now, if it's that she does, she wants to be separate and alone and have her own time and space, that's a discussion you need to have. If she's doing drugs and alcohol and ashamed of it, if she needs to go out and party with her friends and she's afraid you're going to be judgmental or ashamed.
20:07
I don't mind if she does drugs and alcohol. I mean, I do them too and we do them together.
20:12
Andy Milonakis
Why don't you just lie to her and tell her that you're not going to get mad no matter what it is she does, then she'll tell you and then you get mad. It's an old game. It was developed by Adolf Hitler.
20:24
Drew
No, no, I think it was an old Milonakis.
20:26
Developed by Adolf Hitler?
20:27
Drew
No, no, no. He's being glib. But Mark, you see what we're saying? You're accepting BS as an answer. She gives you anything and you go, oh good, thank you, thank you. No, think about it. That's not an explanation.
20:40
Andy Milonakis
Seriously, are you ever confrontational and say, I want to know, I want to know, tell me now? I mean, do you ever like put your foot down or do you pussy foot around and say, I really want to know, honey?
20:51
Yeah, I guess I'm more or less pussy foot. I mean, I tell her I want to know.
20:55
Andy Milonakis
So you got to be firm. I mean, if you want answers, you have the backer into a corner because if you're just, if you're just.
21:03
Isn't that just going to offend her that I'm being like, You're gay. The male and like the alpha male and like she'll be afraid I'm going to beat her.
21:10
Andy Milonakis
No, because you don't have to be. I'm not saying you have to be an a-hole about it, but you have to say, listen, this is really bothering me. I'm not going to take no for an answer. Please tell me then that's it. You know, if you're firm and you let her know how much it is, it's bothering you and you're not just like, well, I want to know if you're strong about it, you know, maybe you'll get an answer.
21:31
Drew
You understand you're shrouding your thinking in what we call shibboleths, Mark, just empty slogans about alpha males. Andy is absolutely right. You feel bad about this. It makes you feel bad and concerned. It's affecting you and the relationship. You deserve an explanation. What's going on here? Things don't feel right to me and my feelings are, I'm entitled to my feelings and I'm entitled to an explanation for the person that I love and that guards those feelings. If you're ready to end this relationship or if you're doing things to put it in jeopardy, I think I have a right to know about that. Or if I'm doing things that are putting it in jeopardy, I'm pushing you away. What's that?
22:10
That's being chivalrous?
22:12
Drew
I said a shibboleth, empty, empty, slogans about alpha males, nonsense. You're sort of rationalizing things rather than being justified and feeling uncomfortable. You don't feel right. It's okay. It's okay to say, I don't like the way things are. I don't feel good. I deserve an explanation. I mean, that's what Andy said, right?
22:33
Andy Milonakis
Yes.
22:34
Drew
That's what you said.
22:34
Andy Milonakis
You said it better, but yes. Yes. Yeah.
22:37
Drew
What? The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. Phone lines are open. Andy Milonakis is in here. I like to take a look. I like to take a little tally of things I learned about our celebrity hosts on the show. So from behind, good?
22:54
Andy Milonakis
Sure. Sure.
22:55
Drew
Good and normal?
22:56
Andy Milonakis
Here. Here.
22:57
Drew
Good and normal? Sun. Yes?
23:00
Andy Milonakis
Yes.
23:00
Drew
Sun. Computers? Community college? Bad.
23:06
Andy Milonakis
Bad.
23:07
Drew
Junior college? Bad.
23:08
Andy Milonakis
Bad.
23:09
Drew
Technical college? Good.
23:10
Andy Milonakis
Good.
23:11
Drew
Okay. West Coast better than East Coast?
23:14
Andy Milonakis
Oh, East Coast.
23:16
Drew
East Coast better than West Coast. We're learning just tons about it.
23:20
Andy Milonakis
New York, baby.
23:21
Drew
All right. Andy Milonakis, again, 1-800-LOVE-191. Call us with your questions and we'll be right back.
23:34
Loveline will be right back.
23:41
Drew
Everybody, it's Loveline. The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. Andy Milonakis in the studio, and he was just telling me off the air he wants to be challenged by the calls tonight.
23:52
Andy Milonakis
I want a physical challenge.
23:54
Drew
No, no, no. Well, meaning what?
23:57
Andy Milonakis
I don't know what that means.
23:58
Drew
You mean you want somebody to come down here? We can do that.
24:01
Andy Milonakis
I just had a flashback from Double Dare on Nickelodeon.
24:04
Drew
I can send you out on the street with a microphone and we can get outside of 57th Street here and see who's hanging out. But there were people here when I came on Sunday night.
24:11
Andy Milonakis
Really?
24:11
Drew
Yeah, fair enough. All right, this is David, 27th.
24:14
Andy Milonakis
Hello, Drew?
24:16
Drew
Hey, what's up?
24:17
How are you?
24:18
Drew
Good.
24:19
Andy Milonakis
Good. Andy?
24:21
Andy Milonakis
What's up?
24:21
Andy Milonakis
The show is awesome.
24:23
Andy Milonakis
Thank you, sir.
24:24
Andy Milonakis
You got a great thing going. I think you should keep up the good work.
24:27
Drew
I have a question.
24:28
I got a little situation.
24:30
Andy Milonakis
May run a bias if I'm on the right track or not.
24:32
Drew
All right, let's go.
24:34
Andy Milonakis
Been married about five years. Kind of started to stray a little bit. Don't know if the reasons are right or not. I don't feel that connection. I'm not the connection because I still feel very strongly for my wife. I don't feel that back from her. I feel that I'm not desired.
24:55
I'm reaching out.
24:57
Andy Milonakis
You're not getting what you're giving.
25:00
Andy Milonakis
Here you go, Andy. I don't want to get a prop, not getting what I'm giving.
25:04
Andy Milonakis
I hear you, brother. I hear you.
25:06
Andy Milonakis
I want to feel bad, but I don't want to feel bad because I'm devoted to my wife. But at the same time, I don't feel like I'm getting in return what I'm trying to give.
25:15
Drew
Though you have to be more specific. Give me an example of what happened.
25:19
Andy Milonakis
I don't feel desired by my wife. There's no physical attraction any longer. It's a struggle. You try to be close and you get pushed away. You still hear, I love you, I want to be with you. But the physical reciprocation isn't there.
25:35
Drew
So hold on. Hold on. So you used to have sex more frequently?
25:39
Andy Milonakis
Exactly.
25:41
Drew
How frequently, say, when you first got married?
25:44
Andy Milonakis
You know, three times a week would be about right.
25:46
Drew
Alright. And where are you guys now?
25:49
Andy Milonakis
Once a month, if that.
25:50
Drew
Once a month? And so when you sort of approach her, what does she say?
25:56
Andy Milonakis
She doesn't say much. Push, a lot of pushing away. Just not, I don't know, this isn't, I don't want to do this, I'm tired. All the normal excuses. We'll do it tomorrow, later, and it just never happens. It never materializes.
26:08
Drew
Have you ever sat her down and said, hey, this is really a problem for me. This is how I experience intimacy. I'm really hurt by you not being available in this way. I enjoyed what we had before. And losing that is a very, very great loss to me. Have you ever said anything like that to her?
26:23
Andy Milonakis
Yes, yes. And that's where the struggle is because I feel like I've taken that step to sit down and proactively say to her what's important and I'm not getting a response still. And I've done my best to be-
26:36
Andy Milonakis
What's her answer to you though when you tell her that?
26:41
Andy Milonakis
There really isn't one. It's almost a double-edged sword. I think that our relationship has gone sour because there's not enough sex. And her response is there's not enough sex because there's no relationship.
26:53
Drew
All right. So there you go. So what is it that you're doing to contribute to her? Because women do need to feel that emotional intimacy before they can feel sexually intimate.
27:02
Andy Milonakis
You're right. And that's definitely a point where we've come to before where she says, you know, we need more interaction with each other. We need to go out and do more things. I want to have a more exciting life, you know, go out more with our friends. So I start trying to go out more and then she doesn't want to go out. She's tired. She works a lot. And it doesn't seem like there are the answers. The answer she's giving when we create the solution for them, it doesn't seem to be the solution any longer.
27:28
Drew
And is she on medication?
27:31
Andy Milonakis
No, but she has been.
27:33
Andy Milonakis
She was in the past.
27:35
Drew
What medicine?
27:36
Andy Milonakis
Zoloft.
27:37
Drew
So she has depression.
27:39
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I think she was on birth control for a while when off of that. I think that was the cause of it.
27:47
Drew
No, they said it was after 10 years or so.
27:49
Andy Milonakis
And they said when you sometimes go off of, I guess, the birth control pill, it can cause a lot of adverse reaction.
27:54
Drew
Yeah, but not enough to need medication for depression. If she has it, you need to be diagnosed with depression in order to require the Zoloft. And Zoloft will completely shut you down physically, sexually.
28:05
Are you aware of that?
28:07
Andy Milonakis
She hasn't been on Zoloft for two years. So when I say she has, it was in the past. And most of our sexual issues have been over the past 12 to 16 months. And it's really, it's this where I am, we're at a point where it's counseling and neither of us are firm believers in going to counseling, we should be able to work these problems out. But when we try, we keep getting ourselves caught up in this circle where it's, I'm not giving to her what she wants, so I'm not getting what I want, but I can't figure out what else I need to do.
28:34
Drew
Well, look, you've done-
28:35
Andy Milonakis
Maybe she's making excuses though.
28:37
Drew
Yes, she is making excuses.
28:38
Andy Milonakis
If you're saying you're doing whatever you can and you definitely know it's not you, and you're giving her everything and she's just saying, well, it's the mental, emotional, blah, blah, blah. If she's all saying that, it sounds like BS that she's just trying to steer you away to make it sound like it's your fault. That's why I'm not getting it.
28:57
Andy Milonakis
I would feel like I'm just no longer the attraction isn't there, the desire for her to want to be sexual with me. Unfortunately, I think even for any man, you at some point want to feel that desire.
29:11
Drew
You want nobody to reach out for you. Of course you do. But David, here's the deal. If you're going to save this relationship, it needs professional intervention. Somebody's not... Either she needs more individual evaluation. There's a trauma history or some issues here about sexuality or maybe her dad, family of origin stuff that needs to be sorted out, or you're behaving in a way that you're not aware of, that she is unable to tell you about, or there are missing pieces to this story in general, but you've done everything right, everything you possibly can. Now it's time then to get some assistance. What's wrong with that? You've done everything possible. There's something really seriously wrong in this relationship. If you value it, get some help. It would be very simple to have an evaluation and have somebody tell you what they think is going on here. Mike 24, Mike?
29:54
Andy Milonakis
Yes.
29:55
Drew
What's going on? You're on Loveline 1-800-LOVE-191. You're on with Andy Milonakis. Andy Smolosmakis.
30:01
Andy Milonakis
Smolosmokis.
30:04
Hey, how are you doing? I was just wondering, you know, I started dating a girl. It doesn't have anything to do with this upcoming relationship, but it's something I was wondering. Like, I've seen those porn online where the girl, like, shoots, like, fluid when she gets off, when she has an orgasm.
30:20
Andy Milonakis
Squirting!
30:21
Drew
Good times.
30:22
And I was just wondering, do all girls do that? Am I doing something wrong?
30:32
Andy Milonakis
Do all girls squirt?
30:33
Yeah.
30:35
Drew
Andy, what's your experience? Hold on a second.
30:37
Andy Milonakis
That's, you know, I've seen those videos too, by the way. And I love those videos also, by the way. Now, I think it's a unique thing. I mean, you know, I think, and the ones on the internet are ridiculous. I mean, a lot of those are, like, actual, like, they're peeing, I think. They're like professionals at it. They make you think that it's not pee, but it is sometimes. And especially when they're doing it, like, eight feet in the air, it's like Old Faithful just comes up and it's like this rainbow stream, like, who is that lady?
31:11
Drew
Who's that lady?
31:12
Yeah, you know, that'd be kind of weird if I just got covered in, like, urine one day and she was like, Oh, it's not urine.
31:18
Drew
It's actually not urine, though there is something called female orgasmic incontinence. That's usually in women that have had children, and they know it's urine. They will, they, I've dealt with a number of these patients, and they will put down tarps and things, and it still flows over the side of the bed, and it's a big mess. They're unhappy with that. And there are operations to help with that, a couple of different operations, some of which actually be done with a laser, and they're pretty elegant procedures, Andy.
31:40
Andy Milonakis
But on the internet, when they're trying to do, like, an eight-foot-high strain, yeah, that's probably somebody peeing.
31:46
Drew
Yeah, somebody peeing. But in fact, if they have a female orgasm, that tends to be fluid from the glands in the area, and it can be a lot of fluid. It could be like, you know, if you have, you put two or three tablespoons out, that's going to seem like a lot. And that's much, much more than semen, and that seems like a lot. So, right? I mean, that's a lot of fluid. What's interesting is women that do that tend to be kind of ashamed of it. They hide it. They don't want to tell anybody about it. They think they're the only ones that do it. And it's a relative, it is quite a rare thing. And Mike, you know, a lot of women your age are still just beginning to have orgasm. The vast majority, well, significant majority don't have orgasm with intercourse. They have it just with oral sex, and they aren't squirting. And do you think, Andy, if you were with someone and it was squirting every time, would that get old? Would you like that?
32:34
Andy Milonakis
If it was like eight feet high?
32:36
Drew
No, regular, not the peace ring.
32:37
Andy Milonakis
No, it's regular, I think, you know, it's all good, you know, do it right in my eye.
32:41
Drew
I think guys are into producing something from women. They feel, and particularly, if women do this...
32:46
Andy Milonakis
I like to produce beets for women.
32:48
Drew
Beets?
32:49
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. I like to do a beatbox for them.
32:52
Drew
I see a beatbox.
32:53
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm just kidding. But yeah, no, I think it's kind of hot. Hot in a Paris Hilton type of way. That's hot.
32:59
Drew
And if women do do that, make the guy think that only he could make you to have this wonderful thing. Because guys love doing something that only they can create and that it's really very extraordinary and they've never seen it before. But yes, no. Mike, have you been with many women?
33:14
Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, like maybe ten or so.
33:17
Drew
And have they all orgasmed?
33:20
Well, I mean, they always say they have an orgasm. I mean, not all of them. I'd say, like, maybe five of them have an orgasm. Yeah, obviously. No, but you know, it's the girls that say they have. And it's like, you know, maybe you didn't actually just the other day faked one myself. It was the first time and it felt really liberating. Like I was getting back at all the girls for doing that.
33:42
Andy Milonakis
You faked an orgasm?
33:43
Yeah.
33:51
Drew
Mike?
33:51
Yeah, I...
33:54
Drew
Andy wants to know how you did that.
33:56
Okay, so the night before, she gave me this really hardcore hand job that kind of got a little injured from. So then the next night...
34:04
Andy Milonakis
A little chaffage?
34:05
Yeah, a little chaffage. A little bleeding. So the next day...
34:10
Drew
Bleeding?
34:11
Bleeding? Yeah, it was intense.
34:14
Drew
Oh my goodness. You're not wearing condoms with these girls?
34:16
Andy Milonakis
Did you squirt?
34:18
This was just from a hand job, so there was no condom.
34:21
Drew
But did you put a condom on when you actually had sex next?
34:23
Yes, I did.
34:24
Drew
So that should have protected some of that.
34:27
Pardon me?
34:28
Drew
That should have protected against further injury, right?
34:31
Right, yeah, that did. And then at the end, it still started hurting a little bit. So I just kind of pretended to fake an orgasm as best I could. And then when I was done, I like hid the condom, like buried it in the trash.
34:51
Andy Milonakis
Where did you hide it exactly?
34:52
Like at the bottom of her trash can.
34:55
Andy Milonakis
You didn't put it in her ear or anything, did you?
35:00
Drew
Very creative, Andy.
35:01
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
35:01
Drew
Very nice.
35:01
Andy Milonakis
I was just going for personal experiences, so I had to hide condoms in girls' ears.
35:05
Drew
Oh, really? That's interesting.
35:08
Andy Milonakis
Demeaning.
35:09
Drew
Well, Mike, did any of them squirt?
35:11
No, I've never seen a squirt.
35:13
Andy Milonakis
So, there you go.
35:14
I was wondering if I hadn't, if that meant that I hadn't been any good or whatever.
35:19
Drew
No, doesn't mean anything. It means that you've just sort of been run across normal old females. Nothing extraordinary. Andy, have the girls been different since your show became popular?
35:29
Andy Milonakis
Yes, a little bit. They tend to want to show me their weird parts, their naughty parts.
35:38
Drew
And how about when you were a computer operator?
35:40
Andy Milonakis
Mm-hmm. Not, you know, a little bit here and there, but it takes a little more work.
35:45
Drew
Before it took more work?
35:46
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, just like two days ago, this girl was like, with her boyfriend even, she's like, I told my boyfriend if I saw you, I was going to flash you. I'm like, all right, let's see. She picked up her shirt and showed me her boobies. And I was like, good times.
36:06
Drew
Good times?
36:06
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, and she was kind of disappointed in that reaction that I wasn't like, whee, like popping open a bottle of champagne, I'm like, you know, she's like, oh, that's all? Good times?
36:18
Drew
Get mad at you?
36:19
Andy Milonakis
A little bit. Yeah, she's with her boyfriend, what am I going to do? Start like grabbing him? Start punching him around like a speed bag?
36:27
Drew
Where were you, in the streets of New York?
36:29
Andy Milonakis
I was actually in church.
36:30
Drew
In church?
36:31
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm just kidding.
36:34
Drew
I believe just if anything comes out of people's mouths, I'll go with you.
36:37
Andy Milonakis
Or into their mouths. I was at some random club.
36:42
Drew
At a club, and just pow.
36:44
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, it's weird. I mean, the girls usually throw themselves at you, seem to want something, think they can get something some way, somehow.
36:53
Drew
Just like when you were a computer geek, same thing, right?
36:56
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, they want to become a network administrator, so they just take off their panties and throw them at you.
37:02
Drew
So you had to work harder?
37:04
Andy Milonakis
Definitely.
37:05
Drew
When you were a computer operator than now, when they sort of...
37:07
Andy Milonakis
It's kind of, you know, it's kind of good to have to put in some work, though, you know? Because you get the girls that you really want instead of the little hoe bags that just throw themselves at you.
37:16
Drew
Well, I'll hear more about this after the break. The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. That's Andy Smellishmockus in here. Don't call him a P-Head.
37:24
Andy Milonakis
Do not.
37:25
Drew
All right, and we'll be right back. Hey, everybody. Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191. I'm Dr. Drew. He's Andy Smellishmockus. Where did that come from?
37:43
Andy Milonakis
And I'm gay.
37:47
Drew
Anderson, don't you fall with a drop?
37:50
Andy Milonakis
Oh, I forgot.
37:51
Andy Milonakis
You're gay.
37:56
Hey, when they're calling themselves gay, I don't need to play it, though.
37:59
Drew
It still would sound. It's just the sound of the one following the other is appealing to me.
38:06
Andy Milonakis
You like gay. I like the word gay.
38:10
Drew
You do? How come?
38:12
Andy Milonakis
It sounds so gay.
38:13
Drew
It's just a nice sounding word, isn't it?
38:15
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. Uh, 42.
38:47
Drew
No, seriously.
38:47
Andy Milonakis
I don't know.
38:48
Drew
I'm worried about Whoopi. She looks a little old, less easy.
38:51
Andy Milonakis
Uh, Clumber Spaniel is always a little bit older. She's doing fine now.
38:55
Drew
She's a what?
38:56
Andy Milonakis
Clumber Spaniel.
38:57
Drew
She looks like a mix with a Golden Retriever or a red Irish Setter or something.
39:00
Andy Milonakis
Very hard to place. I wish I could have a dog, but I didn't have to take care of. I'm bad at being responsible.
39:08
Drew
Really?
39:08
Andy Milonakis
We'll talk later. I have issues with life.
39:12
Drew
Does Whoopi live with you?
39:14
Andy Milonakis
No. Yes. Sometimes.
39:18
Drew
Sometimes. My miss Whoopi. I want to see more Whoopi on the air.
39:21
Andy Milonakis
I do too.
39:22
Drew
Whoopi Shever is her own. Is it he or she? She. She. Shever on the show. Back to you and the girls. Things are better, picking up, since you have a show, you're happy with that or you alluded to the fact that the kind of girls were throwing themselves at you or ones that you really weren't that interested in. You rather work for ones that are really the ones that you want.
39:39
Andy Milonakis
I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to lie and say well you're gay. I'm not going to just never touch a girl who comes up to me because of the show, but I'm a little off put by it. It's a little weird, right? Yeah, like really, really hot girls. I mean sometimes they're not always model caliber, but sometimes they're like really hot. Like not only would I want to be with them, but I would be like, oh my god, just being in the same room with them. And now they're like coming up to me like.
40:10
Drew
Do you go for that?
40:11
Andy Milonakis
Sometimes, I mean, one came up to me and was just like, oh, you're from that show.
40:15
Drew
You were fall in love with them after that?
40:17
Andy Milonakis
No, never love. It's, you know, but I-
40:22
Drew
So that's a different thing.
40:23
Andy Milonakis
It's a different thing, but I'm not really looking for love. I'm not looking for love in all the wrong places.
40:28
Drew
So these-
40:29
Andy Milonakis
I'm just having fun, but, you know, if-
40:31
Drew
That must be nice, so the sort of the number, you're reaching a number, a ranking, that you couldn't have gotten time of day from before.
40:39
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, just hot girls that would never give me the time of day before.
40:41
Drew
Does that make you angry?
40:43
Andy Milonakis
A little bit, but at the same time, I'm like, I know how it works, you know. It's Hollywood, and, you know, that's just how people are, and sometimes you gotta just have fun as long. But, you know, it really, it's really amazing how the hotter the girls are in LA., the crazier they are. Like really crazy, like text messaging me 40 times within 20 minutes, crazy, saying, I hate you, what's wrong with you, why are you not calling me, blah, blah, blah. It's been, it's been, it's been an interesting past six months.
41:17
Drew
Speaking of some craziness, here's Nicole, who's 23. Nicole?
41:20
Caller
Hey.
41:20
Andy Milonakis
Hi, you little sauce pot.
41:23
Drew
Nicole?
41:24
Caller
Yes, I'm here.
41:25
Drew
Here we go. You're on with Andy Milonakis, 1-800-LOVE-191. What's up?
41:29
Caller
Hi. I have a question. I was dating a guy recently and I was told he has admitted to having multiple personalities.
41:38
Drew
He admitted to that?
41:39
Caller
Yeah. Not to, What's that?
41:40
Andy Milonakis
What's personality admitted to that? Was it his normal one or was it, was it like evil Bob?
41:46
Caller
I wouldn't know. This is secondhand information. I was told that he has a personality that is like the cool guy, you know, like the ladies man type. And then there's one that's just a complete jerk that, you know.
41:59
Andy Milonakis
Was it secondhand information because one of his other personalities told you or?
42:03
Caller
No, this is, I was told by someone else that he admitted, well, he told them this and they told me. It's kind of like secondhand information. And I'm just wondering, is this something just, would a person who actually had multiple personalities be admitting this or is this just for something for attention?
42:19
Drew
People with multiples do know that they're multiple and they will occasionally discuss that with people they feel close to.
42:26
Andy Milonakis
Occasionally, their own personalities, they tell their other personality, they say, hey, listen, other you, I have another one of you and it's me, but it's not really me. Hi, Bob. Bob too. I have another personality. And Bob too is like, dude, I know, because I'm it.
42:44
Drew
And you described the same guy, Nicole. You said one guy's a lady man, and one guy's an a-hole. Kind of the same guy.
42:51
Caller
Yeah. All I can say is run. Like some days he'd be really cool with me and the next day he'd act like a jerk and the next day he would act like nothing happened. And he's like, hey.
43:00
Andy Milonakis
It could be bipolar too, though, can't it?
43:02
Drew
People with bipolarity can get very irritable, but he probably was just referring to the fact that he flips between two different extremes in his personality. A person, people with multiple personalities do not have two, they have many. It's rarer that they would have just two. And those people, yeah, and those people have profound, profound trauma histories when they were growing up. This guy that's just sort of out playing and taking advantage of people, and some days is sort of impatient and exploitative and irritable and unpleasant to be around, that's the same guy. He just really is the same guy. I don't think you have to postulate that there's something else going on here. And by the way, you've got him saying to somebody else, you see, I'm sort of two people, I fluctuate, I can be one thing one day, one thing the next. That's not him saying, I've been diagnosed with a dissociative disorder. That's a very different thing, right? Nicole?
43:56
Caller
Oh, I'm here. I'm just listening to what you have to say.
43:58
Drew
Yeah. He would be calling it something like a dissociative disorder or dissociative identity disorder, DID, which is people-
44:05
Andy Milonakis
His way of saying that is probably mood swings.
44:08
Drew
Right. Exactly. People with dissociative identity disorder will say, I have DID. And that's a different thing, okay?
44:14
Andy Milonakis
Or did, if you will. And you will.
44:18
Drew
All right, Nicole?
44:19
Caller
All right.
44:20
Drew
So here's my diagnosis. A-hole. Okay?
44:25
Andy Milonakis
I love you.
44:26
Drew
Andy loves you.
44:27
Caller
Oh, well, I love you too, Andy.
44:29
Andy Milonakis
Bye, baby. I only have one personality. Come to my house.
44:33
Drew
And I barely have one.
44:36
Andy Milonakis
That was a good joke.
44:36
Drew
Here's Chris, who's 17. Hey, Chris?
44:39
Hey, hey, Dr. Drew. How you doing?
44:41
Drew
Good. What's up?
44:43
Andy Milonakis
Dr. Drew.
44:44
Oh, yeah. Hey, Andy. How are you, man?
44:45
Andy Milonakis
What's up, son?
44:46
Drew
Hey, Chris, ask us your question real quick. Then we got to go to break. So go ahead.
44:49
Okay. Well, pretty much I've been with my girlfriend for four months now. And she won't go down on me because she's, she kind of freaked out because I wasn't circumcised when I was a baby. And I'm just wondering if I got it done now, like with anything like could anything bad happen to me if I got the surgery or what that's all about.
45:11
Drew
All right. Excellent question. I'm not sure when people say I didn't get circumcised, they have to throw in as a baby.
45:15
Andy Milonakis
As a baby.
45:16
Drew
So be it. That's an interesting question.
45:18
Andy Milonakis
I was when I was four.
45:19
Drew
When you were four?
45:19
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm just kidding.
45:20
Drew
Well, we're going to get into this. Okay. The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. We're going to get back with Chris's question. 1-800-LOVE-191. That was Andy Milonakis giving you a bogus number and we'll be right back.
45:37
Loveline, we'll be right back.
45:49
Drew
1-800-LOVE-191. It's Loveline, I'm Dr. Drew, and this is. We really need to gift you to come up with the Loveline rap.
46:05
Andy Milonakis
I know I should write it. If I was good enough, I'd freestyle it.
46:08
Drew
Buy them off, buy them off.
46:09
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, maybe I'll freestyle.
46:11
Drew
In all your free time tomorrow. And how old were you when you got circumcised?
46:15
Andy Milonakis
Me?
46:15
Drew
You said four.
46:16
Andy Milonakis
I was just kidding.
46:17
Drew
You were circumcised, as Chris said, as a baby?
46:20
Andy Milonakis
As a baby. And then later I was re-circumcised. They put the little meat back on.
46:27
Drew
You had a restoration procedure?
46:28
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, and then I got it back off again. It's like, you know, I go one way and then I'm like, nah, I want it back. I like the art work look. Then I'm like, nah, I like the helmet look. Then I'm like, it's like style. It's like, you know, like I change, it's like I change a coat.
46:42
Drew
Haircuts?
46:42
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
46:43
Drew
So you got it short, like it long?
46:44
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, yeah. I'm very, you know, very fussy.
46:46
Hey guys, I got a quick question. Jesus.
46:48
Drew
Yeah.
46:49
Andy, when you do those little pranks on those people, like the guy that could barely speak English when you put the shoe on the pizza?
46:55
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
46:56
Does somebody then chase down the hall after him and get him to sign release?
47:00
Andy Milonakis
Exactly.
47:00
Do you guys try and explain what was going on or do they not care?
47:03
Andy Milonakis
You know, yeah, we explain. Like some guy, the first guy we got, Chinese food delivery guy, he came back and we showed him the cameras and we said, look, you were on TV. We were doing a joke. And he goes, oh, TV. And he started doing Kung Fu into the TV camera. But you guys weren't on TV. I think we were. Maybe we'll put it on the DVD.
47:25
Drew
It was a lot worse than it sounds. Let's get back to Chris. Now, Chris, tell us the situation again. You are uncircumcised.
47:32
Right. And I've been with my girlfriend for four months. And she kind of, not refuses, but she's really weird about going down because it kind of freaks her out that I never got it done.
47:48
Drew
All right. So you want to get it done?
47:49
Yeah. Well, yeah. I'm just kind of scared because, I mean, obviously, it's a...
47:54
Andy Milonakis
Tell her that she's being shallow.
47:56
Drew
It is. You know, there's no... Well, there are increasingly medical reasons to do this. For instance, men that get circumcised has less chance of getting the cervical wart virus or the human papilloma virus, which causes cervical cancer. And so some people are advocating circumcision routinely as a way of diminishing cervical cancer throughout the world. So, and there's never been a case of penile cancer in a circumcised man. So it's something that might be worthwhile. It's less upkeep, less hassle, less freaking out your girlfriends. Mike, what I'm curious about is, what are you going to tell your parents when it comes time to apply for insurance for this?
48:31
Well, yeah, I mean, that's another thing is, I mean, I was actually, I wasn't born in the US., I was born in Europe, and that's why, because of the culture, like, they don't do it. Right. So I don't want to, like, disrespect them, but I grew up here, so I mean, I don't know.
48:46
Drew
Are you going to tell my girlfriend, my girlfriend, when she's giving me a blowjob, freaks out at the lack of circumcision?
48:52
Well, I wouldn't put it that way, but.
48:53
Drew
Well, what are you going to tell them?
48:54
Andy Milonakis
You want to just do it for her, or do you want to, like, do it for, because you think it will be better, also?
48:59
Well, she's not the first one to kind of be weird about it.
49:03
Andy Milonakis
Oh, so a lot of them.
49:04
Drew
But here's the deal. You want to do it. It's fine to do. It's a good bit more hassle. You're out of commission for a couple weeks. It's fairly painful, but it's not dangerous. It's no big deal. It's a reasonable thing to do. Men get a lot of tearing and stenosis and problems with it. If you listen to this show, you hear guys calling all the time with difficulties with the previews. But my question is, what are you going to say? What are you going to tell your parents? You're 17.
49:30
Caller
Do I need their permission?
49:32
Andy Milonakis
Don't tell them anything. Come to my house. I have a box cutter and I have some some Altoids. And I think we could do a little underground job.
49:42
Drew
I need a little duct tape.
49:43
Caller
I don't like that idea.
49:46
Andy Milonakis
Seriously, dude, let me do it. I want to do it. I really want to do it. Please, can I do it?
49:50
Caller
And put it on your show?
49:51
Andy Milonakis
No, it's free. It's free. I'll do it for free.
49:55
Caller
I don't like no.
49:57
Andy Milonakis
Dude, don't tell them you want to do it. Tell them it's your body. Yeah, it's my body, mama. I want to do what I want to do. My penis is going to look nice and handsome after I cut it off.
50:07
Drew
Well, Chris, you'll have to apply. Unless you pay cash for it, you'll have to put it on the insurance and they'll see the circumcision come through on the insurance plan and you certainly go see a urologist and maybe scheme with him how you could do this in such a way that your parents don't necessarily find out about it. You don't have to tell them. You are entitled to private medical services, confidential medical services, but it's probably even in their insurance plan.
50:32
Andy Milonakis
They put you under for that for like an hour.
50:33
Drew
You're under and I would think your parents would want to be a part of this just because it's something that you know.
50:38
Andy Milonakis
Because they want to see your penis.
50:39
Drew
It's a procedure and you at least sort of, you know what you say is you're embarrassed by all the guys, you're in this country when you go to shower, the locker room or the football team, you know, it's something you want to do.
50:48
Andy Milonakis
The football team won't go down on you. Because you're not circumcised.
50:51
Drew
And you've heard that it's maybe a little bit healthier to do this as less of the Vart virus and that sort of thing. This is Steve with 23. Steve?
50:58
Andy Milonakis
Hey Steve, how you doing? I was just wanting to know is it possible that a female can be born without a clitoris?
51:07
Andy Milonakis
Wow, you got an accent.
51:11
Andy Milonakis
Well, yeah.
51:12
Andy Milonakis
Hollaback, Hollaback, where you from, cuz?
51:16
Andy Milonakis
I'm from Cincinnati, Ohio.
51:18
Andy Milonakis
My dad was a gambler. He ate charcoal and bread.
51:24
Drew
No, women cannot be born without a clitoris. You ever come across one, Andy?
51:27
Andy Milonakis
No, but they do have, they do remove a clitoris in certain.
51:31
Drew
There, that's true. In certain cultures, they will take off the clitoris.
51:35
Andy Milonakis
Which is horrible. Why do you want to take such joy away? So it's the seed of joy from a little, from a little young sexy lass.
51:43
Drew
You know, it's interesting. There was a study done in the journal. They showed that most of these women still retain their orgasm function even without the clitoris.
51:50
Andy Milonakis
Really?
51:51
Drew
Yes, because the nerves are all there. So what, Steve, what is it that's about your girlfriend?
51:54
Andy Milonakis
Some are bigger than others. I mean, maybe it's harder to find. You know, I'm like a doctor too. I'm Dr. Andrew.
52:01
Andy Milonakis
Well, all right. Well, I just want to, because she doesn't have one as far as I'm aware of.
52:07
Drew
No, she has one, Steve. She has one.
52:09
Andy Milonakis
It's just harder to find.
52:11
Andy Milonakis
Is it possible that she could have been born a man?
52:17
Drew
It's possible, but she would have a penis. A penis then, right?
52:21
Andy Milonakis
No, that's what I'm saying. I just, I was watching something on the TV the other day about how a penis was accidentally cut off in circumcision at a very young age.
52:41
Andy Milonakis
I'm guessing that this guy is putting on an accent.
52:44
Drew
No, he's right. That happened once.
52:46
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm not saying that.
52:47
Andy Milonakis
I was wondering if it's possible that it could have happened.
52:49
It's not possible for a guy with his accent to have a TV in his house.
52:53
Drew
No, that's even, that's possible. Let's see, Mike, what's not possible is for you to have all these concerns about your girlfriend. You're not asked her about them.
53:01
Andy Milonakis
Well, I have. I've just got, you can talk to her if you want.
53:04
Drew
Well, I'd love to speak with her.
53:05
Andy Milonakis
Me too.
53:07
Andy Milonakis
Here, Danielle, talk. Just talk. It ain't no big deal. I don't know who you are.
53:15
Andy Milonakis
It is totally fake call, by the way.
53:18
Drew
Just a delight. Did you hear it? What you maybe not heard on the air that was sort of bleeped out was, she has a bleeping period and therefore she is a woman. She's got a point you made there. She has uterus, she has ovaries, she is functioning. I think what Steve is worried about is that she doesn't orgasm.
53:37
Andy Milonakis
I'm just worried about, I don't know if it's a comedy trooper or if this is a real life because if it's a real life it's great.
53:42
Drew
Well I want to get back to Steve. Anderson, is it okay if I go back to him?
53:46
Caller
Yeah, give me a second because she said it twice. I had to hit the whole button. We lost ten seconds.
53:52
Drew
That's alright. That's okay. So if you can, I'm going to re-up here. It's 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Andy Milonakis with us. We've struck pay dirt with a couple in Ohio. And Andy wants to talk to them. She dropped the F-bomb several times. So we lost a little chunk of the show.
54:10
Andy Milonakis
And she may have dropped the C-bomb.
54:12
Drew
And the deal though is that he is concerned that she does not have a clitoris. She responded with a few F's and S's that she has a period and therefore she's a female. And indeed, you need functioning ovaries and a uterus in order to have a period. And I think what Steve is getting at is Steve, you there?
54:29
Caller
Drew, ask some questions to see if it's real though first.
54:32
Drew
No, listen, I'm just going with this for now.
54:34
Steve? Yeah.
54:36
Drew
All right. Is what you're really concerned with that she doesn't have an orgasm?
54:42
Andy Milonakis
Well, no, it's that and she does not have a clitoris because when I go to give her oral sex, I cannot find a clitoris and I know that's the main area of stimulation. And no, I can't give her an orgasm through oral stimulation or through intercourse.
54:58
Drew
Okay. So that's really more of the concern because clitoris, the existence or non-existence of the clitoris doesn't, in a global philosophical sense, doesn't really matter to you. Steve?
55:09
Andy Milonakis
Well, no, I mean, it doesn't matter.
55:10
Andy Milonakis
She doesn't have one.
55:12
Andy Milonakis
All right.
55:13
Andy Milonakis
What city and state were you born in?
55:15
Andy Milonakis
I was born in Kentucky.
55:17
Drew
Shocking.
55:18
Andy Milonakis
Knoxville.
55:20
Drew
Nice. I'm heading out to Kentucky next week. In fact, I'll be speaking at University of Kentucky in Lexington.
55:27
Andy Milonakis
Yes, it's a hellhole.
55:29
Drew
Lexington's beautiful.
55:31
Andy Milonakis
I hate it all.
55:32
Drew
You hate Kentucky?
55:33
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I want to move to a big city. I'm in Cincinnati now.
55:37
Drew
That's a big city.
55:38
Andy Milonakis
Well, I want to move to LA.
55:42
Drew
Well, that's like what Andy did. Andy will help you out.
55:44
Andy Milonakis
I'll help you out because I think you can join a comedy troupe that I'm in.
55:48
Andy Milonakis
Is that Milonakis?
55:50
Andy Milonakis
It is, sir.
55:51
Drew
Yeah, it sure is.
55:52
Andy Milonakis
When are you guys on the air?
55:55
Andy Milonakis
Right now.
55:56
Drew
Oh, when is his show?
55:57
Andy Milonakis
Oh, my show?
55:59
Drew
You're on the air right now, but Andy's show.
56:01
Andy Milonakis
New episodes are coming out in March.
56:03
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I love you. You're a little funny guy.
56:06
Andy Milonakis
Thank you, brother.
56:07
Andy Milonakis
Goofy looking, but you're funny.
56:09
Caller
Hey, ask him how to make a movie show.
56:10
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, your action's goofy, buddy.
56:12
Drew
Steve, can I talk to Danielle or whatever her name is?
56:14
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, well, she's being shy. Danielle, will you talk?
56:18
Drew
Tell her she cannot use the F word or the S word.
56:20
Andy Milonakis
Come on, totally fake.
56:22
Andy Milonakis
She's a, hold on, she'll talk. Just hold on.
56:25
Drew
Okay, just tell her no F or S.
56:27
Andy Milonakis
No, you can't cuss. Just talk to them. They ain't gonna bite you. Just please talk.
56:32
Drew
I think I'm in love with Steve.
56:34
Andy Milonakis
I think I'm in love with this girl.
56:35
Andy Milonakis
Say hi. Hi.
56:37
Drew
Hi there. Hey, how are you? It's Dr. Drew and Andy Milonakis. Danielle?
56:43
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, hi.
56:44
Drew
There we are. There we are. It's Dr. Drew and Andy Milonakis. And your buddy there, Steve.
56:47
Andy Milonakis
Is your boyfriend real?
56:49
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, he's real.
56:51
Andy Milonakis
Is that his real accent?
56:52
Caller
Yeah.
56:53
Andy Milonakis
No.
56:54
Drew
Yeah, I know I think. I'm pretty good at this.
56:57
Andy Milonakis
Wow, this is genius.
56:58
Drew
This is genius.
56:58
Andy Milonakis
I'm from Ohio.
57:00
Drew
Yeah, you sound more like Ohio and he does not sound like Ohio.
57:02
Andy Milonakis
I'm really happy that this is real.
57:05
Drew
Here's the deal, Danielle. Steve seems obsessed with giving you an orgasm. Why isn't he able to do that?
57:11
Andy Milonakis
I have no idea and I think I do have a clitoris.
57:14
Andy Milonakis
I just don't think he knows what he's doing.
57:16
Drew
Hold on, Danielle, I'm certain you do too. Don't worry, we're on your side with this one. My question though is, we'll be able to solve this whole thing if we can teach Steve how to give you an orgasm, okay?
57:25
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
57:26
Drew
All right, what's he not doing?
57:29
Andy Milonakis
I have to say this is really false.
57:31
Drew
Danielle, what's the problem?
57:33
Andy Milonakis
I don't know, I don't know what he's doing wrong.
57:36
Drew
Have you ever had an orgasm?
57:38
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I have.
57:39
Drew
But not with Steve?
57:40
Andy Milonakis
Not with him.
57:41
Drew
And what's he doing wrong? What's he need to do? Just you and I talking.
57:48
Andy Milonakis
I don't know. I don't know.
57:50
Drew
I don't know what he's doing wrong. Is he too aggressive or too fast or too much pressure?
57:55
I mean, he's a skinny guy.
57:57
Drew
No, I mean, not with his penis. I mean, when he tries to give you oral sex.
58:02
Andy Milonakis
He has a long penis.
58:04
Drew
No, no.
58:05
Andy Milonakis
Does he put a 10-gallon hat on his penis before he tries to have sex with you?
58:11
Drew
No. No, okay. So I'm talking about oral sex because that's going to be the most likely thing.
58:15
He don't give me oral sex much.
58:17
Andy Milonakis
Ah, what a bastard.
58:19
Drew
Okay, bingo. Now you can give us Steve back in, okay?
58:22
Okay.
58:22
Drew
All right. Steve, we solved your problem. You need to give her oral sex in the vicinity where there would otherwise be what you call a clitoris. Okay?
58:33
Andy Milonakis
All right. But I mean, I try. Well, when I usually do it, it is not for that long.
58:39
Drew
Do you do it for longer? Do you know where the clitoris is? It's outside the vagina. It's not inside the vagina.
58:44
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I know. There should be a hood.
58:46
Andy Milonakis
Go on google.com and search clitoris and look at some technical pictures and find out exactly where it is and draw a road map to it.
58:55
Drew
But it's oral sex that's going to give her an orgasm. That's what you need to get down and get busy with because all this other business about you being worried about her, not him and clitoris, not important. Daniel, sounds like a great girl. Make her happy, okay? Make us proud, Steve. Make Andy. Andy's going to come steal her. He's on his way to Cincinnati with a crew, you know.
59:13
Andy Milonakis
And I know how to find that.
59:15
Drew
You guys call it clitoris.
59:17
Andy Milonakis
A job?
59:19
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
59:20
Andy Milonakis
What do you want to do?
59:21
Andy Milonakis
I don't know, man. I was thinking maybe I could try some having to deal with crank yankers.
59:29
Andy Milonakis
See he has no accent right now.
59:31
Drew
Yeah, magically. All right, this is Anthony, 19.
59:36
Andy Milonakis
Oh, yeah.
59:37
Andy Milonakis
I have a question.
59:39
Drew
Yeah, what's up?
59:40
Andy Milonakis
What was the first thing you bought when you got, well, famous, whatever you want to call yourself? Yeah, Frandy.
59:47
Andy Milonakis
Say it again.
59:49
Andy Milonakis
What was the first thing you bought when you got rich?
59:53
Andy Milonakis
Well, I'm not really rich, but the first thing I bought, I don't know, I really, I didn't really blow it on a specific thing. I kind of just did a big like carrying a couple thousand dollars on me and going out and totally partying and going out to like amazing restaurants and taking my friends out and going out and buying bottles and stuff.
1:00:19
Drew
What was that?
1:00:21
Andy Milonakis
You know, short time? No, actually, I've been good, you know. I've been good lately. You know, I've been calmed down. I've calmed down, but you know, when all this stuff first starts happening and all of a sudden you're making like decent money and you know, you bust your ass and all of a sudden, you know, all this good stuff is happening, you know.
1:00:38
Drew
It takes a while to make real good money. I think people have a misconception that if you have a popular TV show, magically you're making huge amounts of money.
1:00:45
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, it really takes a long time.
1:00:47
Drew
And by the way, the money you made, you made when the show finished production, not after it became popular.
1:00:53
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, yeah. It takes a long time to come. Like, I'm still not at a point where like, people picture me in like my own like amazing house and stuff. Like, it's still, you know, it takes a long time to get to that point. But, you know, I still had fun. I had a chunk of change and I blew, I blew some of it. I said, you know, I tried to save a little bit, but it's not easy saving. But I mostly didn't buy like one specific item. I mostly was big on just going out and having like a blast by like getting hotels and fancy dinners and, you know, going to clubs and doing it all.
1:01:25
Drew
That's cool. You shared it with your friends.
1:01:26
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, yeah.
1:01:27
Drew
That's cool. Here's Ricky, who's 15. Ricky?
1:01:30
Caller
Hey.
1:01:31
Drew
Hey, what's up?
1:01:33
Caller
I'm 15 and I'm six foot and 218 pounds. That's a good thing. I've never been unpopular, but I really am self-conscious. And is there any way that you know if I can like try to break that?
1:01:50
Drew
Andy?
1:01:51
Andy Milonakis
You're self-conscious?
1:01:53
Caller
Yes.
1:01:53
Drew
At 15, were you self-conscious, Andy?
1:01:55
Andy Milonakis
Sure.
1:01:56
Drew
So was I.
1:01:57
Andy Milonakis
I think, not that you should be a faker and put on a fake personality, but I think like, you know, one of my favorite codes is like perception is reality. People perceive you like to be, you know, what people perceive you to be is like what you are. Like if you give off a certain vibe, people think that, you know, if you walk into a place like you own it and you're just this confident, cool guy, then you are that cool guy. Because people see something and then that's how they judge you on.
1:02:29
Drew
To act as if you had self-esteem.
1:02:31
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, like, you know, act like as if you have self-esteem.
1:02:34
Caller
Like most of the time, but on the inside, I'm just like, wow, what, you know, like I'm really self-conscious. Like if someone would play around, like I really crack jokes all the time, someone plays around saying you're fat or anything. For the whole week, I'm just like, man, look at this. I'm just huge and-
1:02:51
Drew
All right, Ricky, here's the deal. Everyone 15 feels like hell. Everyone 15 feels awkward and uncomfortable.
1:02:58
Andy Milonakis
Kids are bastards.
1:02:59
Drew
Kids mistreat each other at 15 and everyone goes home feeling bad. The reality is each person is worrying about their own crap and not really giving any concern about one another's or yours. So they're not sitting and thinking about you and worrying about you or thinking that you're fat. And by the way, you're not fat. You're six feet, 200 pounds. You're just a good linebacker size.
1:03:16
Andy Milonakis
Try a little self-deprecation. That always does the trick. You steal the thunder from people when you make fun of yourself. Like, you know, if you go into a room and you're joking with your friends and you call yourself a fatty, like, wow, I'm such a fatty or whatever. When you take that, when you say that and then when someone else says it, it takes the meaning away from them because you're so open to joke about it, even though it might not feel good at first. Like, you kind of steal the thunder away from them and you're just like, you know.
1:03:45
Drew
And get focused on stuff that you want to do. You get focused on things you're passionate about. Magically, you won't be so worried about what everyone's thinking, about how you don't feel good about yourself. You worry about what you're working on and what you think is important. And all of a sudden, people will be attracted to you. You'll have self-esteem and things will kind of build from that.
1:04:01
Andy Milonakis
I'm a fatty. I'm way fatter than you are.
1:04:04
Drew
Sabrina, 26.
1:04:06
Andy Milonakis
Sabrina, I'm just kidding. I'm not fat. I just lost 50 pounds.
1:04:09
Drew
You did not.
1:04:10
Andy Milonakis
I'm just kidding. No.
1:04:11
Drew
We were talking about having a biggest loser, though, that Andy might want to be a part of.
1:04:14
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, biggest loser ever.
1:04:17
Drew
What's up, Sabrina?
1:04:18
Andy Milonakis
Hi. I was wondering. I heard you talk about how you think BDSM, when people are interested in that, that it's a result of, you know, experiences in their life. And I'm just curious if that's possible for it to be hereditary, because I know that me, my sister, and my father all have varying degrees of interest into it.
1:04:37
Drew
Well, first of all, when it comes to human behavior, there's always some genetic component, so I'd imagine the answer to that would be yes. On the other hand, the fact that you discuss your sexual behaviors and fetishes with your father...
1:04:47
Andy Milonakis
You know, I don't discuss it with him. It's been... Mm-hmm.
1:04:52
Andy Milonakis
Daddy loves you.
1:04:53
Andy Milonakis
Finding things, cleaning the house, and even then my stepmom wrote a book, and there were things in there, and it's led me to that conclusion. Now, my sister is disgusting.
1:05:05
Drew
You discuss it with your sister. Well, the one common thread in terms of experiences that lead to BDSM kinds of preoccupations are being physically abused in childhood. So people hit you with objects growing up, made you feel powerless and out of control. That becomes something that you reenact in your adult life with an erotic intent.
1:05:22
Andy Milonakis
I'm totally lost. What happened?
1:05:24
Drew
So people get physically abused in childhood, turn that into an erotic kind of a compulsion when they're...
1:05:30
Andy Milonakis
I've been interested in it since before. I mean, I was abused as a child, but my interest, I can remember my first bondage experience at four years old.
1:05:41
Drew
Yeah, but you were probably struck...
1:05:42
Andy Milonakis
That was before any abuse.
1:05:44
Drew
Well, how could you be having a sexual experience at four?
1:05:47
It wasn't sexual.
1:05:50
Andy Milonakis
It was just, I remember playing with the boy next door, and we used little kids, you know, play handcuffs, and I remember that, and I remember liking that, and wanting it more and again.
1:06:00
Drew
And you had not been physically felt to feel powerless before that, I'm sure. The parents that beat you don't start when you're five.
1:06:06
Andy Milonakis
I was never beat, no.
1:06:08
Drew
Didn't you say you were physically abused?
1:06:09
Andy Milonakis
I said I was abused but not physically. Not, not physically.
1:06:12
Andy Milonakis
Emotionally?
1:06:13
Drew
What kind of abuse did you have?
1:06:14
Andy Milonakis
I have been very emotionally and sexually abused.
1:06:19
Drew
Sabrina, you're breaking up here a little bit. You were sexually abused and emotionally abused, but no one ever struck you?
1:06:26
No.
1:06:27
Andy Milonakis
I was never with a fist.
1:06:29
Drew
No one ever hit you with anything?
1:06:30
No.
1:06:32
Drew
All right. Well, how old were you when sexual abuse started?
1:06:36
Andy Milonakis
I was 13.
1:06:37
Drew
13, not before that?
1:06:39
Andy Milonakis
No.
1:06:40
Drew
And who was it that abused you?
1:06:41
Andy Milonakis
Is that late? Who?
1:06:48
Drew
Your mom wrote a book about BDSM. Your dad is into it. Your mother's husband sexually abused you.
1:06:54
Andy Milonakis
Not my father. What? It was not my father that did it.
1:06:58
Drew
No, I understand. Oh, that makes it totally different. Forget it. I forget what I was going to say. No, of course, this is a family that's in trouble. There's horrible boundaries here. And the boundary issues obviously prevailed or sort of spilled into your sexual conduct as well. You don't have the usual profiles, certainly sexual abuse, powerlessness, if they've held you down when you're being sexually abused, that then becomes something you reenact as an adult. The amazing thing about the human being, as I've said over and again, is that the experiences of terror in childhood becomes things that you reenact over and over and over again through your sexual choices, through your sexual behaviors, and sometimes if they start making you feel ashamed or guilty, you'll start hating the people that participate with you on these things. And that shame and guilt will motivate you to do it even more. So that can be quite a problem. Andy Milonakis is in here with us tonight. The phone number is...
1:07:49
Andy Milonakis
He's good, he's good.
1:07:50
Drew
1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Do you like a little rough trade, a little bit of handcuffs, anything you're...
1:07:57
Andy Milonakis
Handcuffs? You know, handcuffs. I like handcuffs, but I just like when they're taking criminals to jail.
1:08:06
Drew
You don't like using them in anything? You have no sort of special preferences, actually. You just like...
1:08:10
Andy Milonakis
Oh, yeah, yeah, I do, but I will not discuss them with you on the air.
1:08:16
Andy Milonakis
Off you pansy!
1:08:17
Drew
Okay.
1:08:18
Andy Milonakis
Nah, I'm just kidding.
1:08:19
Drew
I'm going to interview Andy during the break and I'll report back.
1:08:21
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, yeah. It's a lot of jellies that taste like pina colada.
1:08:26
Drew
Oh, you like those jellies, particularly? Excellent. 1-800-LOVE-E-191. It's Loveline, Andy Milonakis.
1:08:32
Andy Milonakis
Fruity Nipples, Fruity Nipples.
1:08:34
Drew
In the studio with us and we'll be right back.
1:08:38
Loveline will be right back.
1:08:50
Drew
That's right, Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191, Andy Smellishmock is in here tonight. Andy?
1:08:56
Andy Milonakis
Hi, how are you doing?
1:08:58
Drew
You had something you wanted to ask me. I shushed you off.
1:09:00
Andy Milonakis
What's the difference between Norco and Vicodin? You said they're pretty much the same thing.
1:09:03
Drew
They are the same. Norco has a little higher content of Vicodin in it.
1:09:06
Andy Milonakis
Oh, well, I know the hydrocodone is, and the normal Vicodin is five milligrams.
1:09:12
Drew
And you get up to seven and a half, I think, in the Norcos, or maybe even 10 sometimes.
1:09:16
Andy Milonakis
Well, they have Vicodin extra strength.
1:09:19
Drew
That's really just more Tylenol.
1:09:21
Andy Milonakis
But I thought it was 7.5.
1:09:23
Drew
It may be at 7.5, but I think the Norco goes up to 10.
1:09:26
Andy Milonakis
Oh, okay, okay, okay. I crushed my arm, like, really, really badly in this editing bay. And they gave me, like, this whole metal electronic gate came and crushed my arm, like, really badly. It was about, it was when we were editing season one, so about eight months ago. Wow. And, you know, it took me, like, five minutes to pull my arm out of this thing, like, really, really bad. I thought I was going to lose my arm. I was, like, panicking. So I went to the emergency room, and I was, like, in such pain, and it took them, like, 45 minutes to see me even. I was just pacing back and forth. They're like, you have to sit down. I'm like, my arm just got crushed. I can't sit down. And then they finally saw me. They gave me a couple of Vicodin, and it felt like it never happened.
1:10:13
Drew
Wow, interesting.
1:10:13
Andy Milonakis
It was like, I was like, oh, my God. My arm doesn't feel bad at all anymore.
1:10:18
Drew
The risk of all that is when you crush the muscle, it gets into your bloodstream, it can shut your kidneys down.
1:10:22
Andy Milonakis
Really?
1:10:22
Drew
That has to be checked. I'm sure they checked that. They did your blood, right?
1:10:25
Andy Milonakis
Yes. I'm glad, yeah, I'm glad I got out. It took all my might to get out of that damn gate.
1:10:31
Oh, my God, awful.
1:10:32
Drew
All right, Josh, 15.
1:10:34
What?
1:10:35
Drew
What's up there?
1:10:36
Andy Milonakis
Oh, not much. What's up? What's up there, Ace?
1:10:38
Drew
You're on with Mr. P. Head. Oh, what's up, Mr. P.
1:10:42
Andy Milonakis
Head?
1:10:42
Andy Milonakis
I like your hair.
1:10:43
Andy Milonakis
Can I have it?
1:10:44
Andy Milonakis
Ha ha. Nice, buddy. Hey. That's cool to the show. I love it. I love it.
1:10:48
You know, you know, in your show, what's the deal with the guy with the fish?
1:10:52
Andy Milonakis
The guy with the fish is like everywhere. I know. He's just like my doppelganger. That's what we call him. We just like to, you know, he's just like my inner beast. We just make him pop up at random places.
1:11:05
Drew
He's like the scary monkey in Family Guy.
1:11:08
Andy Milonakis
We're going to put him in. We have a lot more fish guy in season two coming out soon.
1:11:14
Drew
Cool.
1:11:15
Andy Milonakis
That's in March, ain't it?
1:11:17
Andy Milonakis
Say again?
1:11:18
It's in March, ain't it?
1:11:20
Andy Milonakis
That's going to come out in March. Yeah, man. It's probably early, early March, like March 1st. And the DVD for season one should be out a couple of weeks before that.
1:11:29
Drew
You didn't say much about what it's like to film now that you're known, when people see you out there and whether the old people are on to you or not.
1:11:34
Andy Milonakis
The old people are not really on to me that much. A couple of them are. We have a couple of hecklers. People are like coming by like, Hey, they give us a disgrace to us. Don't sign. Don't sign. You know, there's some idiots trying to bother us. But like when school lets out, there's like a flock of kids following us sometimes. But they kind of keep their distance. And you know, it's not that bad. The older people, we kind of, you know, they don't watch MTV.
1:11:59
Caller
So it's good.
1:12:01
Drew
Josh, you have a question?
1:12:04
Andy Milonakis
Well, no.
1:12:08
Drew
Andy, do you have a question for Josh?
1:12:10
Andy Milonakis
Josh.
1:12:10
Caller
I want to talk to Andy.
1:12:11
Caller
He's real cool.
1:12:13
Drew
How old are you actually, Josh? We hung up. He's been waiting his whole life to talk.
1:12:17
Andy Milonakis
His whole life. My show came on like a year ago. He's like, when I was two, I knew this fat kid Andy Milonakis was going to have a TV show. I want to talk to him at some point.
1:12:29
Drew
There was.
1:12:30
Andy Milonakis
Well, thank you, sir.
1:12:30
Drew
He achieved his life goal. This is Gilbert 17.
1:12:34
Caller
Oh, hey, how's it going?
1:12:35
Drew
We're good. What's up, Gilbert?
1:12:36
Andy Milonakis
What's up, dude?
1:12:37
Andy Milonakis
Well, I got a question.
1:12:39
Andy Milonakis
Like, I used to masturbate a lot, like a lot constantly, you know? And now I don't do it too much, and I haven't had sex. My question is, when I do have sex, like, am I going to last longer, or am I going to come quicker?
1:12:54
Drew
Or did you run out of semen?
1:12:56
Andy Milonakis
No, not yet.
1:12:58
Drew
No, not yet. Okay. That's coming. It's not going to make any difference. Gilbert, your rhythm is your rhythm, and the masturbation is not going to really affect that.
1:13:07
Andy Milonakis
Although, if you do it right before, like, the day off.
1:13:10
Drew
Yes, that can prolong your stamina a little bit. But the fact that you masturbated during your teens, that really doesn't mean a damn thing.
1:13:19
Andy Milonakis
Really? So, not like, there's not like a four-year layover with masturbation. Like, if you masturbate, like, you know, a half an hour before you have sex, then you'll last longer.
1:13:31
Drew
A lot of guys do that in order to last longer. But it's not like you're going to run out of semen or magically change your biology by masturbating too much.
1:13:37
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I actually have ran out of semen. I'm officially out. I asked Jesus for more, but he said no.
1:13:42
Caller
Well, I mean, like, there was a point...
1:13:44
Drew
Now, when Andy masturbates, powder comes out.
1:13:46
Andy Milonakis
Powder. It all looks like rainbows.
1:13:50
Andy Milonakis
Like, there was a point that I would do it, you know, a couple of times a day.
1:13:55
Andy Milonakis
Like, I wouldn't even eat porn.
1:13:57
Andy Milonakis
Did you get bored of it?
1:13:59
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, like, porn is just, like, after a while, I was just like, wow.
1:14:02
Andy Milonakis
Not bored of porn. What? Like, why don't you masturbate anymore? You get bored of masturbating?
1:14:06
Andy Milonakis
Not really.
1:14:07
Caller
Like, some down?
1:14:08
Andy Milonakis
So why don't you do it right now?
1:14:10
Caller
I was just, like, I don't know.
1:14:11
Andy Milonakis
I just, because I used to do it a lot, but now I'm cutting down on it.
1:14:14
Andy Milonakis
Cutting down, like, like, cutting down on cigarettes? Like, ah, you know, I only stroke two times a day now.
1:14:20
Andy Milonakis
Actually, yeah, I'm like, I'm trying to stop smoking cigarettes, too.
1:14:24
Drew
Okay, okay, so as he does, he's a guy trying to prove his health overall. He's just cut back on carbs, cut back on masturbating, cut back on tobacco.
1:14:30
Andy Milonakis
I only had five Twinkies today, but I touched myself eight times.
1:14:33
Drew
This is Melissa, 19. Melissa?
1:14:35
Andy Milonakis
Yes.
1:14:36
Drew
Hey, what's up there?
1:14:37
Andy Milonakis
What's up, legal girl?
1:14:38
Drew
You're on with Andy Milonakis, 1-800-LOVE-191.
1:14:42
Andy Milonakis
Hi, well, I just had a question. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now, and he keeps wanting to pursue A-Sex, and I...
1:14:55
Drew
Hang on a second. You cut out there.
1:14:56
Andy Milonakis
I think you said anal. I always know when you say anal.
1:14:59
Caller
Yeah.
1:15:01
Andy Milonakis
Yes, I heard it.
1:15:02
Drew
We hear you now. Andy's actually channeling you, so it's fine.
1:15:07
Andy Milonakis
As long as I hear an A, I know what it stands for.
1:15:09
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. Well, yeah, he keeps on trying to pursue that, and I don't want to do that.
1:15:16
Drew
Good.
1:15:17
Andy Milonakis
Don't do it ever.
1:15:20
Andy Milonakis
Well, I mean, I've tried it once, but I was drunk, and then I just really didn't want to afterwards.
1:15:27
Andy Milonakis
I don't blame you. I've never let anyone do that to me.
1:15:30
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
1:15:31
Andy Milonakis
Except Dr. Drew.
1:15:32
Andy Milonakis
He'll buy anal beads and stuff, and I'm just like, no, I don't want to.
1:15:39
Drew
Hey, Melissa, hold on a second. My advice is, first piece of advice is, when he approaches you with those kinds of ideas, don't say no the way you just said it.
1:15:48
Andy Milonakis
Say, also-
1:15:49
Drew
That encourages him.
1:15:50
Andy Milonakis
You have to promise me you're going to dump George Milonakis, my father.
1:15:57
Andy Milonakis
We've been together a year, and we just moved in last month together.
1:16:01
Drew
Hey, listen, you are in command of the ship here. You say, hey, no, the answer is no and cut it out or I'm not going to have sex with you at all.
1:16:08
Andy Milonakis
Just stand your ground. Just say, just say you'll not, just say.
1:16:10
Andy Milonakis
He'll try to put his fingers there and everything.
1:16:14
Caller
How dare he?
1:16:15
Andy Milonakis
How dare he? That's my job.
1:16:17
Caller
I know.
1:16:21
Andy Milonakis
Why don't you, you can't sound like a push over though, and girls just like, no, don't do that. Like that's going to just make them be like, yeah, whatever, you know.
1:16:28
Drew
That makes them want to do it more.
1:16:29
Andy Milonakis
I'm the man and I'm going to do it. You know, just be like, listen, don't ever try this again because I really don't like it, and if you do, then we're done. And that's all, and then he'll be scared because then he'll be scared he'll get nothing.
1:16:40
Drew
Or you know, you don't have to threaten the end of the relationship, but you can end the threat of sex and possibly if you want the end of the relationship. But Melissa, you have to be super clear. You can't be giggly and, oh, no, no, I don't want to do that. No, that spurs him on.
1:16:54
Andy Milonakis
Tell him that every time he mentions anal sex...
1:16:56
Andy Milonakis
I was doing it when I was drunk, and then he like keeps on trying to do it, and I'm just like, oh, I really don't want to, and I don't know.
1:17:04
Andy Milonakis
Tell him for every time you mention anal sex that you're going to have sex with me.
1:17:09
Andy Milonakis
Yeah. On the other hand, I sort of feel like we're not compatible because I feel like he's way better than me. He's already graduated college, and I'm still in college, and he's pretty much paying all the bills.
1:17:23
Andy Milonakis
And he has sex with girls in their anus, and you don't?
1:17:27
Andy Milonakis
No, I'm actually his first.
1:17:30
Andy Milonakis
Really? So you're better than him.
1:17:33
Drew
So let me understand this. You're afraid you're going to lose him if you don't do something that you find painful and unpleasant?
1:17:39
Andy Milonakis
Well, possibly, because I...
1:17:41
Drew
That would be a good thing, then, right? This guy that's forcing something on you you don't want to do and you find painful? He's not going to leave you because of this. Trust me. Listen, what do you ladies think? These guys are just going for whatever they can get. He wants to be having sex with you. That's what's good for him. Yeah. He's trying to push the boundaries of all that. He wants to see how far he can get things.
1:18:00
Andy Milonakis
Once you give in to anal sex, then he's going to try to put it in your ear.
1:18:03
Drew
He's going to try something else. Look, Melissa, be very clear. Don't be giggly. Don't be sort of, you know, sort of cute or too passive. Yeah. You're being sort of coy about this. Do not be coy. Be look, be very serious. And this is all hurts me. And we're not going to do this.
1:18:22
Andy Milonakis
Throw your hands up at me. All the women independent. Throw your hands up at me. Yeah. You got to you got to be a little spice girl, girl power.
1:18:34
Andy Milonakis
All right.
1:18:34
Drew
Well, why don't you got no play, playa? All right, Melissa. Good luck now.
1:18:38
Andy Milonakis
I really appreciate it. And I listen to y'all like every night on my way home. Because I'm constantly at school and everything. And this is the only time I get to like really chill.
1:18:49
Drew
What do you study?
1:18:49
Andy Milonakis
I'm listening to y'all. I'm actually in the surgical tech program. I have a year left.
1:18:55
Drew
Are you a nurse?
1:18:56
Andy Milonakis
No.
1:18:57
Drew
Just surgical tech. That'll be cool. Is there any particular kind of surgery you like, particularly, or?
1:19:02
Andy Milonakis
Well, I was wanting to be like...
1:19:05
Drew
Quotology.
1:19:06
Andy Milonakis
In the OR.
1:19:08
Drew
But do you like neurosurgery, abdominal surgery, orthopedic surgery, or are you just available for...
1:19:13
Andy Milonakis
I would say the abdominal.
1:19:14
Drew
Abdominal, general surgery.
1:19:16
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
1:19:17
Drew
And what does your boyfriend do now that he's out working?
1:19:19
Andy Milonakis
Well, he works at Yankee Brothers. It's like a tractor place. He works on tractors.
1:19:26
Andy Milonakis
Oh, you're much better than him. Trust me, you got your head in the right direction.
1:19:31
Andy Milonakis
He makes really good money doing it. Like, he makes $20 an hour, and that's what I'll be doing.
1:19:35
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, but when you do your thing, you're going to make 80 Gs a year.
1:19:39
Caller
Yeah.
1:19:41
Andy Milonakis
Well, thank you guys so much.
1:19:42
Drew
Hi, Melissa. You hang in there, okay?
1:19:44
Andy Milonakis
I love you. Let's have anal sex.
1:19:45
Drew
Andy's in love with you, so you can tell your boyfriend you're going to leave him for Andy.
1:19:49
Andy Milonakis
I won't pressure you to have anal sex, just in the first one. Okay.
1:19:54
Drew
The normal hole?
1:19:54
Andy Milonakis
The normal hole.
1:19:55
Drew
Okay.
1:19:58
Andy Milonakis
Dirty, dirty talk. Dirty talk. Can we change the show name to Dirty Talk? It's Dirty Talk. Dirty Talk.
1:20:06
Drew
Whatever you want, Andy. We can do it.
1:20:08
Andy Milonakis
Now get ready for hot horny studs.
1:20:10
Drew
This is Adam, who's 24. Adam?
1:20:12
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
1:20:13
Drew
Hey, what's up?
1:20:14
Andy Milonakis
Oh, not much.
1:20:16
Andy Milonakis
What up, son? How you doing, kid?
1:20:19
Andy Milonakis
Oh, pretty good. Pretty good. How about yourself?
1:20:22
Andy Milonakis
All right. I'm good, y'all. Just living, y'all. Just trying to live another day. You know what I'm saying? I'm just trying to live another day. Yeah, I don't sell crack no more. Yeah, I don't steal no more. I'm just trying to live another day. You know what I'm saying, son?
1:20:34
Oh, I hear you. I hear you.
1:20:35
Andy Milonakis
Word up, kids.
1:20:36
Dr. Drew in the hizzy.
1:20:39
Andy Milonakis
All right, man.
1:20:40
Drew
That's what I was gonna say.
1:20:41
Andy Milonakis
I have this problem where I can be sober as a judge and can't talk to women whatsoever. But once I've actually after I've had enough drinks to black out, beer courage, boy, I lose all inhibitions and, you know, I can talk to women and you really need that much to black out.
1:21:04
Andy Milonakis
Can you just have like three or four beers, get a little buzz and then the outgoing personality comes out. You really need to have that extreme.
1:21:13
Andy Milonakis
Yes, yes, that's my problem, actually.
1:21:15
Drew
Well, that's not a good sign, Adam, on a couple of fronts. One is blacking out is a sign of alcoholism, so it suggests that that may be underway here. Number two, if you can't feel good enough about yourself that you can't even sort of function normally in a social environment, that's something that needs a little looking into. I mean, it might be a social anxiety disorder or maybe you really need to focus on your work and your life until you've... We gave this advice to a 15 year old an hour ago, which is focus on things that you were passionate about, make you feel good and feel like you're contributing something, and magically you won't be so worried about the anxiety in these social situations because you'll feel better about yourself. Don't you, Andy?
1:21:54
Andy Milonakis
I concur.
1:21:57
Drew
It's Andy Milonakis here on Love Line or what do we call it? Dirty Talk now?
1:22:00
Andy Milonakis
Dirty Talk. It's Dirty Talk. Dirty, dirty, dirty. It's Dirty Talk. Hey.
1:22:06
Drew
1-800-LOVE-191. Andy and Dr. Drew will be right back.
1:22:21
This is Loveline.
1:22:26
Drew
Andy Milonakis on Loveline tonight at 1-800-LOVE-191. By tomorrow, Andy's gonna have a rap for Loveline.
1:22:34
Andy Milonakis
I will have a Loveline rap.
1:22:37
Drew
Or Dirty Talk, or what do you call this show?
1:22:39
Andy Milonakis
Dirty Talk, Dirty, Dirty, Dirty, Dirty Talk. I said Dirty Talk with Dr. Drew, yeah.
1:22:46
Drew
This is Holly, who's 20. Holly?
1:22:48
Hi.
1:22:49
Drew
Hey, what's going on?
1:22:50
I had a question. I am 20 years old and I'm attracted to much, much older men than I am.
1:22:57
Drew
How old?
1:22:58
Like 30 plus.
1:23:00
Drew
30 plus?
1:23:01
Yeah, like 10 years or more older than me.
1:23:04
Drew
What's the oldest guy you've dated?
1:23:06
I, well, have seen a guy that was 37.
1:23:10
Drew
You mean you went out with him?
1:23:13
Yes.
1:23:13
Andy Milonakis
Or you just saw him on the street corner?
1:23:16
No, I mean, we had relations for a while.
1:23:21
Andy Milonakis
You are very mature. You said relations. You're mature, older, longer, younger, older, lassy, lassy.
1:23:30
Drew
In a couple of years, this won't be such a bad thing. Your 20 and 22, 24 to be dating guys in their early 30s would be normal, right?
1:23:37
Right.
1:23:39
Drew
So.
1:23:41
But this has been going on with me for like the last three or four years. And it's kind of weird because I'll see my friends and they'll be having, you know, people at the same age as them. And I'll be.
1:23:50
Andy Milonakis
How old are you? 20?
1:23:51
Drew
20. What is it about the older guys?
1:23:54
Huh?
1:23:55
Drew
What is it about the older guys?
1:23:56
I don't know. I don't know. It's something I have no idea what it is about them.
1:24:00
Andy Milonakis
But they're salt and pepper hair.
1:24:04
Drew
Did your dad take off when you were young?
1:24:06
No, he didn't.
1:24:07
Drew
Was he an alcoholic or was he unavailable in some way?
1:24:10
No, he was there all the time.
1:24:12
Andy Milonakis
Do you know what about them you like better? Did you say that already?
1:24:16
Drew
She was unclear.
1:24:16
I'm not exactly sure what it is about them.
1:24:19
Drew
But just if you had to guess what it was, what would you think?
1:24:24
The maturity, maybe.
1:24:27
Andy Milonakis
So you don't like guys who go blib blab blab blab blab blab dirty talk, dirty talk, Dr. Drew, yeah, yeah.
1:24:34
Drew
No, I should like that. No, especially.
1:24:37
Andy Milonakis
I will win you over before you hang up that phone, ma'am.
1:24:42
Oh, I dare you.
1:24:43
Andy Milonakis
See, she's laughing now. I want her over.
1:24:48
So I'm not sure if this is unusual or?
1:24:51
Drew
It's a little bit out of range, just a little bit. Yeah, but the fact that you like guys that are more settled, that are more mature.
1:24:56
Andy Milonakis
Doesn't seem that crazy.
1:24:57
Drew
Doesn't seem that wild.
1:24:59
Andy Milonakis
There are 70 now. That would be something.
1:25:00
Drew
Here's what you want to watch out for. Watch out for guys that are in a different phase of life. In other words, if you don't share the priorities and goals, then you really don't know and you can't judge what they're up to. A guy in his 40s who's dating a girl at 20, I worry about the guy. Even a guy above 35 or so.
1:25:17
Andy Milonakis
Watch out for wrinkly balls also.
1:25:20
Drew
Wrinkly balls are bad. The part that makes them wrinkly is called the dartos tunic.
1:25:27
Andy Milonakis
I actually knew that.
1:25:28
Drew
You did know that?
1:25:28
Andy Milonakis
No, I didn't.
1:25:31
Drew
It's sort of okay, but kind of watch out.
1:25:33
Andy Milonakis
Yeah, I see what you're saying. Now, it makes sense because a girl who's going for a mature guy, but a guy who's just going for 20-year-olds is kind of like, you feel like he's a creepy sniper.
1:25:43
Drew
He's certainly not thinking the same thing that she's thinking. She's thinking, oh, I'm in love with this guy, I'll settle down with him. He is just exploiting. He's hanging out. He's dating young girls. This is now, Mandy is 21. Mandy?
1:25:55
Andy Milonakis
Hi.
1:25:56
Drew
Hey, what's up?
1:25:57
Andy Milonakis
Hey, I just, I had a question about herpes. If you're exposed to it, how long can it, like, dormant in your body before you have a breakout?
1:26:05
Drew
Well, some women don't know they have it at all until they give it to somebody else. That's not uncommon at all. And the more common duration is about two weeks. You sort of get a flu-like syndrome and then the lymph nodes down in the inguinal area will sort of swell up and then you get the...
1:26:20
Andy Milonakis
Either two weeks or never.
1:26:22
Drew
That's right, that's right. And it can be a very exuberant, intense reaction or it could be something you think is just was a yeast infection that kind of goes away and so you didn't really know you had it. Or it can be mild and you don't really realize you had anything at all.
1:26:33
Andy Milonakis
I like the word exuberant.
1:26:35
Drew
What happened with you, Maddie?
1:26:37
Andy Milonakis
I'm just, I'm not really sure what is going on. I just had some issues and I didn't, that could be the cause and if I got it from somebody, went.
1:26:47
Caller
So.
1:26:49
Drew
It's rather common.
1:26:49
Andy Milonakis
Because I know my current partner, like I know my current partner doesn't have any STDs, but it could have been someone I slept with a couple of months ago. So.
1:26:59
Drew
That's true. It could have been. But it would be kind of unusual for you not at some point to transmit it then to your boyfriend. In other words, if he's not having it, you're not, you're having sex without a condom. You're supposed to have this and you haven't given it to him after a couple of months. That's kind of, that's kind of.
1:27:14
Andy Milonakis
Buckle up, it's the law.
1:27:16
Drew
Yeah. And by the way, if they try to diagnose it with a blood test, don't rely on that. They have to do a culture to really definitively show you that you have that. Denise 21.
1:27:25
Andy Milonakis
Hi, Dr. Drew.
1:27:27
Drew
Hey, Denise, what's up?
1:27:28
Andy Milonakis
Hi. I'm sorry, I'm kind of nervous. Are you chewing gum?
1:27:33
Drew
What was that we just heard? Was that you spitting something out or?
1:27:36
Andy Milonakis
I was plugging in my cell phone, that's all.
1:27:38
Andy Milonakis
You're plugging in what?
1:27:39
Drew
She's plugging in her cell phone.
1:27:40
Andy Milonakis
I was plugging in my cell phone. Okay, I have a question. My mom is in a very abusive relationship. I'm sorry, I'm very nervous. She recently got hit by him really badly, like extremely badly, like he almost killed her. And she still took him back, and now she refuses to have a relationship with me because I refuse to have a relationship with him. And I try so hard, like so hard to get her alone and just to speak with her and you know, even for Thanksgiving, I was like, I'm not going to come to the house. You know, I don't want to be around him. I want absolutely nothing to do with him because I was raised, you know, in abusive relationships, like all my life and she was able to walk away from those. Why can't she walk away from this one? You know what I mean? And she refuses.
1:28:32
Drew
Yes, I hear what you're saying. Now, let's, I got a couple of questions. Have you had some therapy or something?
1:28:37
Andy Milonakis
When I was like in middle school and a little bit of high school, yeah.
1:28:40
Drew
Okay, so it sounds something sounds good, like something's taken, that you've really, you can, you're sort of mature. You can be objective about things. You're not, you're not repeating traumas the way she is.
1:28:51
Andy Milonakis
No, absolutely. Like I find joy that I can walk away and choose not to be in those kind of relationships rather than.
1:28:58
Drew
And the limit, the boundary you're setting with your mother is totally appropriate. My question is, well, my question is, why haven't the authorities been notified? In California, you're required by law to report this.
1:29:11
Andy Milonakis
Oh, they know. Like they were called and he was taking to jail and it was a huge ordeal. And she just sat there.
1:29:17
Andy Milonakis
How long was he in jail for?
1:29:19
Andy Milonakis
He was in jail for like a week. Well, not really a week, probably a little bit more than a week. But she still continuously saw him even though she had a restraining order against him. And then he got sent back to jail because somehow the cops found out about that.
1:29:34
Drew
Denise, are they doing drugs together or are they drinking or something? Oh, God, no.
1:29:38
Andy Milonakis
No, my mom is very religious.
1:29:40
Drew
Alright, here's the deal. You have to let your mom live her life. This is not over. He will do this again.
1:29:47
Andy Milonakis
I know and he wants to move to Tampa with her.
1:29:50
Drew
Hang on. Well, she has to live her life. She's a big girl. Educate yourself as much as you can about the battered woman syndrome and be prepared to get her help when she reaches a crisis next time because this is going to happen again. I'll give it certainly three to six months and I'm thinking three or four months is probably more like it.
1:30:11
Andy Milonakis
Is it good to like can she have like all this printed stuff out and like if she gets in touch with her mother maybe have some stuff to show her mother?
1:30:18
Drew
I think you just have to go yeah you just find out who's who does this sort of treatment in your area when she comes back in crisis looking for help you take her right in because that's when she'll be open for change. When she hits bottom with this then she'll be willing to do something. In the meantime Denise just like if she were a drug addict or doing anything else compulsive unfortunately all you can do is let her live her life. Tell her that you love her but that you have to disengage with love because you cannot be a part of her being harmed. Andy Milonakis on that kind and lovely note. Is that nice? We'll end on a nice up note, a lifting call. We go from squirting to anal sex to poor Denise and her mom who I wish them the best.
1:30:58
Andy Milonakis
Yeah and I hope that guy gets a beat down.
1:31:01
Drew
And Andy will be in here again tomorrow night. He'll be back with a rap. He promised me. The phone number is 1-800-LOVEY191. And we'll be right back again. How do you want me to say it?
1:31:12
Andy Milonakis
Loveline will be right back.
1:31:29
Drew
Well, that about does it for Love Line. Andy Smellishmock is in here tonight.
1:31:33
Andy Milonakis
Dirty talk, dirty talk, dirty, dirty, dirty talk.
1:31:36
Drew
And we're back again in tomorrow night. I'm very excited. We are getting our sort of our mojo down here, our rhythm down. It's going to be good.
1:31:43
Andy Milonakis
It's like, what's the two? It's like the two stooges minus one plus three. I don't know.
1:31:50
Drew
Or Abbott-Gustalo or something like that.
1:31:52
Andy Milonakis
Yeah.
1:31:52
Drew
It's good. Amos and Andy. Whatever. We're getting it going. All right. Well, listen, do call in tomorrow night and we'll look forward to your calls. Andy, we're back in here with me again tonight. Tomorrow night rather in the studio. And until that time, this is Dr. Drew saying good night. Then stay well.
1:32:05
Andy Milonakis
Dirty talk is dirty talk. Dirty, dirty, dirty is dirty talk. Hey!
1:32:12
This has been Loveline. Loveline. The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, the management, the sponsors, or the station. The producer for Loveline is Andy Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.