Episode 1000702067702

0:57 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Listener discretion is advised. This is Loveline. With Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:21 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, Dr. Drew. Board Certified Physician, Addiction Medicine Specialist. Tonight, thanks for making that noise, Drew. From Fox's Point Pleasant, Elisabeth Harnois is here. Hello, Elisabeth.

1:37 Hi. Smart.

1:38 Adam Elisabeth is smart. I can tell that. Well-mannered, smart. Thank us for being here tonight.

1:44 Drew Isn't that nice?

1:45 Adam Thanks for having me, she said. That's nice.

1:47 Elisabeth Harnois Is that rare?

1:48 Drew It's never happened before.

1:49 Elisabeth Harnois Really?

1:49 Adam Rare. We usually get English bands that are drunk and on a different time zone and they don't even look up when you walk in.

2:00 My questions are going to my picket.

2:01 Adam That's right. Now, you're going to be fine, Elisabeth, and Drew is already slid into ask his mode. Get up on your microphone there. I was having a laugh about really the essence, the essence of radio, Drew, the essence of radio. We captured it all in the first couple of minutes of the show, half off the air, half on the air. One was produced me complaining about the coffee. All we have is coffee here. That's all we have. That keeps us coming in. Let me explain something, Elisabeth, then we're getting to point pleasant. We're going to plug the hell out of this show.

2:41 Drew She needs a plug.

2:42 Adam No, we're going to work it. I'm going to f that show right out, believe you me, but here's how radio works. You're used to television. Let me explain radio. Radio works this way. You get the smart and final jumbo size can of generic coffee with the creamer that just says whitener on it, powder form.

3:02 Drew Powdered whitener.

3:03 Adam If you say to somebody, listen, can we have some decent coffee? We work a late night shift here. Drew and I both enjoy a cup of Joe. The answer comes down from the big man. No, there'll be no decent coffee, and you'll get no milk. And if you want it, feel free to buy it on your way in. That's how radio goes. In which case, I then say, well, then I'm going to quit. So you have to go get some coffee. And now it's a big battle over $9 a year worth of coffee and milk. And eventually I win because I throw a tantrum. Now the coffee maker's on the fritz. The thing comes through like somebody drank a pot of coffee and then whizzed into my mug. It's basically what it tastes like. Lauren has been on the guy for some weeks now to fix it. And guess what, Drew? Not fixed. Not fixed. Not fixed. But the other thing that reminded me of that is almost every single night when we have a guest, about 10 seconds in the show, I hear engineer Anderson yell, turn the guest up. Now, here's the beauty of radio. That will go on for infinity. There'll be no connection tomorrow night with the guest and turning it up. Then there will be tonight and the same with the coffee.

4:15 Caller I don't yell. I just say turn her up, turn her up.

4:17 Adam Yeah. It's very casual except for everyone always jumps whenever you do it because you're loud in our cans. But thanks Anderson. There's the very essence of radio. And in other fields, like if you worked in any other field, you would be fired. But here's the thing about radio, they don't pay anybody. So you can't really fire anybody. It's all volunteers. It's like firing people in radio. It's like you firing a windmill at a golf course, at a miniature golf course. Or it's like trying to fire the wind. It just, it doesn't exist.

4:47 Drew Can't do it.

4:49 Adam How can you fire someone you don't pay? That's it. So there you go. That's radio. Don't pay anyone. But when they don't fix anything, you can't fire them. All right. Let's talk about you, baby doll. Yeah.

5:02 Elisabeth Harnois And you're still here. And you're still having fun.

5:04 Adam Oh yeah. Yeah. Just got to get some good coffee over here. So Drew, Drew's a big fan of Point Pleasant by the way.

5:11 Elisabeth Harnois Thank you.

5:11 Adam And his wife, who is, she said, well, we call her the star maker.

5:18 Drew I told you she picks up.

5:20 Adam Yeah.

5:21 Drew She picks up.

5:21 Elisabeth Harnois I hope she's right.

5:22 Drew Look at this. Look at this.

5:24 Adam Drew bought a camera.

5:25 Elisabeth Harnois He's got the fancy digital camera.

5:26 Drew No, just a camera. She sent this out with me. How weird is that?

5:30 Adam Your wife said, take the camera. Take a picture of Elizabeth.

5:33 Drew Yes.

5:34 Adam And then what?

5:36 Drew I don't know what she wants to do with it.

5:37 Adam You're going to be in the picture. Yeah. You better watch out.

5:40 Drew We'll find out later.

5:41 Adam No, she's a huge fan of Point Pleasant, which is Fox Thursday Nights at nine o'clock. And Drew, big fan as well.

5:49 Drew Yeah, I've actually been watching with it.

5:50 Adam Drew was excited.

5:53 Drew Thank you.

5:53 Adam Elizabeth was going to be on the show, I think, last week, but some kind of shooting schedule or something came up. Drew was a crestfallen, by the way.

6:01 Drew Ruined my week.

6:02 Adam Devastated.

6:02 Drew My month.

6:03 Adam Devastated.

6:04 Elisabeth Harnois It was a couple of weeks ago. You have to know that I was excited to come on the show, so every time that it almost worked and then didn't, I felt really bad, too.

6:12 Adam Well, Drew has not recovered until just now, but he's positively giddy. And then when he found out that you went to a nerdy college, he's now through the roof. He's over the moon because Drew's hobbies, his only hobby I know him to have is college.

6:29 Caller No.

6:30 Adam He's like Bill Cosby with those sweatshirts. Yeah, yeah. Except for he doesn't actually get anything from the college because that would cost money, but he likes to think about it. That's free. But he loves college. He loves to talk institutions from around the world and around the country. And you went to what college?

6:47 Elisabeth Harnois It kind of happens to you when you go to one of those schools that all of a sudden there's this enormous amount of pride. And you just, it's a community, I think. And you kind of foster that community, whether or not you realize it, you're talking about it.

7:02 Adam Which one did you go to?

7:03 Elisabeth Harnois Wesleyan University.

7:04 Adam Wesleyan, oh, I've heard that one. Drew speaks of that on occasion. Drew's excited too. Maybe a little jealous and turned all into tree.

7:11 Elisabeth Harnois I don't know. I think Amherst right now is probably ranked above Wesleyan.

7:15 Adam Oh really?

7:15 Elisabeth Harnois It's funny, all those schools are always very neck and neck.

7:18 Drew But this Amherst, Wesleyan, and William's the same kind of school.

7:21 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah.

7:21 Adam Well, we'll get to the bottom of it. Chris, off the top of your head. You know what? Amherst, is it Wesleyan? Yeah. Yeah. Wesleyan or Amherst, which one's ranked higher?

7:33 I would go with Amherst.

7:35 Adam Go with Amherst?

7:35 Because that dude came in, you know.

7:37 Adam Yeah, I had that dude.

7:38 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah. I don't know. I don't really, I don't know. What?

7:42 Adam There was that one dude that went to Amherst.

7:43 Drew Radio. Radio.

7:44 Adam All right. Now look it up on some kind of ratings chart.

7:48 Drew US News and World Report. Is that a school ranking?

7:50 Adam US News and World Report. Right. Then look up Kanaeho Junior College where you go and see if that made the top 5,000 cut.

7:59 Drew All right.

7:59 All right.

8:00 Adam Is there ranking for junior colleges?

8:03 Drew There might be, but I'm sure Kanaeho's on there.

8:05 Adam Okay.

8:05 Drew Pasadena ranked high. Yeah. That's a good time.

8:07 Adam That's right.

8:08 Drew Top five, I think. No.

8:09 Adam When they say ranked high, it had the highest students per capita. They do a year and a half.

8:13 Drew You grew up out here though?

8:14 Elisabeth Harnois I grew up, yeah, in Riverside.

8:16 Drew In Riverside?

8:17 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah.

8:18 Caller Whoa.

8:19 Drew Wow. How'd that happen?

8:20 Elisabeth Harnois I don't know. I actually was born in Michigan and my parents moved from Michigan to Riverside. I really, I don't know.

8:28 Drew How'd you go from Riverside?

8:29 Elisabeth Harnois We lived in Woodland Hills as well. We lived across Southern California.

8:32 Drew How'd you go from Riverside to Wesleyan? That's just, that's chattering.

8:36 Adam It's going from Michigan to Wesleyan. I mean, and-

8:39 Elisabeth Harnois Oh yeah, Detroit to Wesleyan. How's that? We'll skip the middle.

8:41 We'll skip those 15 years.

8:43 Adam 15 years in Riverside?

8:45 Elisabeth Harnois Well, I went to high school in Riverside.

8:46 Adam Wow. Wow, baby. He's so strong. Proud.

8:51 Elisabeth Harnois Hey, don't dis Riverside. Riverside is a good place.

8:54 Riverside is a horrible place.

8:55 Adam No.

8:55 It's horrible.

8:56 Adam Bakersfield makes fun of Riverside. Yes, they do.

8:59 Elisabeth Harnois Ouch.

9:00 Adam Yeah.

9:00 Elisabeth Harnois I'm sorry to Riverside right now. I apologize.

9:02 Drew Is Riverside proper? Not some-

9:04 Elisabeth Harnois Well, I don't, no, yeah.

9:06 Drew Cucamonga or something like that?

9:07 Elisabeth Harnois No, no, no. No.

9:08 Adam Oh dear, dear God.

9:10 Drew Wow.

9:10 Elisabeth Harnois No, and I'm, you know, it was, it was actually nice because I grew up acting.

9:14 Drew She actually was the daughter of the devil. Yeah.

9:17 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah, I am the sponsor.

9:19 Adam You, you, you, in your, you grew up act, you grew up acting?

9:23 Elisabeth Harnois I grew up acting and it was nice, it's actually nice to live in Riverside because I was, you know, it sort of limited the amount of child acting I would do. You know, we would only commute once in a while and we would only go in for the projects that, you know, I was excited about, you know.

9:36 Adam You wouldn't go on auditions all day long.

9:38 Elisabeth Harnois It wasn't all the time.

9:38 Adam Yeah.

9:39 Elisabeth Harnois It wasn't like a career when I was five. It was a hobby. And that was sort of an interesting barrier there. It created an interesting barrier because it wasn't convenient to go into Los Angeles, you know, three and four times a week.

9:49 Drew Did you train in acting your whole life?

9:51 Elisabeth Harnois I think if you consider being on a set, you know, from the time I was a kid. I didn't take like, you know, kid theater camp, you know.

9:58 Drew And you said college was history?

10:00 Elisabeth Harnois History and film. I majored in. I took some theater, you know, I did take some theater classes, but I didn't. I actually was between NYU, Tisch School of the Arts and Wesleyan. And I thought, I've been acting my entire life. And, you know, I want to do something else.

10:14 Adam What set were you on as a child or as a young person?

10:18 Elisabeth Harnois What set?

10:18 Adam You said you were on the set.

10:20 Elisabeth Harnois Oh, meaning that I, you know, when I was working, various projects, film, television, whatever, I, you know, being being around, you know, talent helps you just sort of you learn, you absorb, you're a sponge when you're a kid.

10:29 Adam So I've been telling Drew this all for nine years now.

10:32 Drew What was it? It's still in the comment.

10:33 Adam Yeah. No, but I thought what was your most? Did you have a regular gig or did you have something?

10:40 Elisabeth Harnois Well, I the first it's it's kind of it's one of those stories where, you know, it was hard to say no once it started because the first thing I auditioned for, I got and my mom was not a stage mother. She hated the whole scene, you know. But I enjoyed it and I was having fun. So she she kind of gave in to me.

10:55 Adam What did you land? What were you?

10:56 Elisabeth Harnois It was a cake commercial for Duncan Hines and I had one line. It was deluxious. And apparently I nailed it because I got it. I was three and I got to eat chocolate cake. I thought, hell, acting is really fun because I get to eat chocolate cake and not remember that at three. Oh, I totally remember it.

11:12 Adam Wow.

11:12 Elisabeth Harnois I totally remember it. That was it was good cake.

11:14 Adam Well, I don't want to, you know, put the screws to your mom. But you're three years old.

11:20 Elisabeth Harnois I made all the decisions. No, that's always the question.

11:23 Adam Duncan Hines Factory to do the audition. I mean, she must have decided.

11:27 Elisabeth Harnois It was definitely. No, I'm not going to, I'm not going to, you know, pretend it's something it was. I mean, my parents, you know, definitely were involved. I mean, they made the decisions.

11:36 Drew There are parents that look at their kids and say, hey, my kid is cute. I bet we get some money out of this for college.

11:41 Caller Yeah, that was Elizabeth's parents.

11:42 Elisabeth Harnois Well, I'd pay for college.

11:43 Drew But I'm saying that they don't aren't necessarily like, oh, honey, you've got to do this. They just go, eh, I wonder if the speeds might be a two-week. We have some free tires to fill our desks.

11:51 Adam Well, parents saw I had a talent as well, but they just figured it was in carpet cleaning. That's what they know.

11:56 Drew And look what happened.

11:57 Adam I know, they got me my start.

11:58 Drew Yeah, the carpet cleaning went on for quite some time.

12:01 Adam It's awesome. Oh, I can never stop thanking them. Never, never stop for getting me into that carpet cleaning. Never stop.

12:08 Drew They really had a lot to do with that, huh?

12:11 Adam I really think they were, I would call it my carpet cleaning muse.

12:14 Drew The first move was putting you out in the garage.

12:16 Adam Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then my dad cowering while my step mom kicked me out of the house. And they really pushed me toward carpet cleaning. I really, I got to get into their props. And if there was some sort of carpet cleaning award when I accepted it, I would definitely thank them.

12:31 Drew Did they mention Wesleyan or Williams as part of the?

12:34 Adam No.

12:34 Drew No.

12:35 Adam No. They thought those were black names.

12:36 Drew Oh, okay.

12:37 Adam They didn't know they were actually colleges. All right. I'm sorry, Elizabeth. Go ahead.

12:42 Elisabeth Harnois No, just, you know, my parents, they saw it as a hobby for me. It was a hobby. Yeah, it wasn't for them. It wasn't about really a financial gain thing. It was more of a they knew it would be good for me in terms of being able to pay for school.

12:54 Adam And yes, there's an interesting thing, which is people, you know, the parents that get their kids into almost anything, but especially acting, gets sort of a bad rap. On the other hand, if your kid is good at something and has a natural capacity or at least a love for something, what's so different about acting in the cello? You know what I mean? If the kid's playing the violin or the piano, everyone's like, oh, well, that's wonderful. Ari has a gift for languages. He's taken all these language classes or something. That's great. But acting, you're a pimp all of a sudden. But there are people that genuinely have talent and should be led that direction.

13:29 Drew Let me just say, you've met Corey Feldman.

13:31 Adam Delight.

13:32 Drew And you met-

13:33 Adam Talent. Yeah.

13:35 Drew You met a few other people that have been to that experience.

13:37 Adam Amazing cello player.

13:39 Drew Actor. And it doesn't always work out to the health and benefit of the child.

13:43 Adam No. But I am saying that if you have a child, children-

13:49 Drew In principle, you're right.

13:50 Adam Here's what I'm saying. There's some kids that have a mechanical aptitude. They start tinkering early. Whenever you hear about these, they do these bios on Howard Hughes or any of these industrial guys. He was three and he was taking his bike apart, starting welding a motor to it, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. If you have a kid who's going down that path, you should get them some tools and let them do it. And by the same token, if you have a kid who likes to dress up and sing, why don't you put them in the choir or take them to acting class?

14:18 Drew Right. Agreed.

14:19 Adam All right.

14:20 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah, that was me.

14:21 Caller Right.

14:22 Drew And Elizabeth is a great actress. Seriously.

14:24 Adam And it worked out. She's normal. She's got her head screwed on straight.

14:27 Drew Something's wrong.

14:28 Adam Sure, she goes home and freaks on her boyfriend. It's a crap out of her pet.

14:33 Elisabeth Harnois They're both listening right now, so.

14:35 Caller I'm getting a pet too.

14:37 Adam You want to give your pet a command and see if it works over the radio?

14:40 Drew That's Satan or what?

14:41 Caller She-

14:42 Adam Yeah. Well, you have a dog?

14:45 Elisabeth Harnois Yes.

14:45 Adam And you have a boyfriend too?

14:47 Elisabeth Harnois Yes.

14:48 Adam All right. He's not good enough for you.

14:49 I tell you that right now.

14:50 Elisabeth Harnois Yes, he is. He's beyond good enough for me.

14:53 Adam Oh, he's got you brainwashed. Interesting. Smart.

14:56 Elisabeth Harnois That's flattering.

14:56 Adam He's like Manson, this guy. All right. Here's my point. If your boy is your boyfriend with your pet right now?

15:03 Elisabeth Harnois No, I think I think she's probably at home. He's with some friends listening right now.

15:07 Adam All right.

15:07 Elisabeth Harnois Be nice.

15:08 Caller I was going to conduct an experiment where we actually where we actually soft my dog a bit.

15:11 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah.

15:12 Adam Command the dog through the stereo.

15:13 Elisabeth Harnois She's very, very OK. Here's an example. I do ADR at least once a week for the show.

15:18 Adam That's voiceover work for you kids at home.

15:20 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah. When we when we have sound during dialogue, we have to record it again later in post. But Rosie's sitting in the studio where the technician is. And I'm in another room.

15:29 Adam That's your dog for the kids.

15:30 Drew Or what kind of dog?

15:31 Elisabeth Harnois Rosie. She's a mutt. She's Chihuahua, Pekingese and Beagle. Or something. Wow. She doesn't look like a Chihuahua. She's a normal sized dog. But if I call her name over the she she freaks out, she's you know, and she she knows and I can tell her to sit and she'll kind of it's the voice of God to her. She can't locate the you know, doesn't know the source. It's kind of fun, actually, to play that game with her.

15:52 Adam I was I was giving this some thought yesterday with the dog, you know, like this sort of you have sort of the you have Paris Hilton and now you have it's very trendy. Everyone's got a lap dog.

16:04 Caller She's not these days.

16:06 Adam No, your dog's not a lap dog. But I'm just saying more and more more, you know, Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton. It seems like almost everyone has their lap dog. And when you have a lap dog, you get to take it wherever you want to take it. You go on an airplane with it, you go to a hospital with it, you go in a store with it, you just walk into restaurants. That's just your dog. It's like it's sewn to your hip. No one ever, like, I've never seen Paris Hilton walk anywhere or on any shows or anything. And everyone go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no. See dog? No dogs, no dogs. Get out with the poodle. But they, or the chihuahua or whatever they have. But then I started thinking, I got a dog and I can't bring it anywhere. I can't just go walking into a Macy's with my dog.

16:45 Drew It weighs 95 pounds.

16:46 Adam Well, that's my point. But why should weight make a difference? It's like, if I had a really fat cat, I couldn't bring it in. But if I had a smaller cat, I could bring it in.

16:55 Drew We had a makeup artist who used to hold the dog while she was making herself.

17:00 Adam We had a makeup artist who used to hold, in one hand was the dog, in the other hand was the kissing potion I demanded. Because, you know, it was the MTV days, I had a look on. I had a little of that Adam Ant vibe going. But the point is, is that a certain point I had to tell her to put the goddamn dog down. She was bothering people, and she could only work with one hand because she had to hold the Pekingese with the other. But here's all I'm saying. Either you can bring a dog on a plane or you can't. Either you can bring a dog in a theater or you can't. You can bring a dog in a market or you can't.

17:32 Drew You can bring it, so it shouldn't matter.

17:33 Adam Why does Paris Hilton's crappy chihuahua get to go everywhere, and my crappy fat lab doesn't get to go with me? And then I just realized, if you can carry it, you can bring it. So if I take this fat lab of mine, which now, my dog's now funny because its head is the size of a baseball, but the rest of its body is massive. That's awesome.

17:55 Elisabeth Harnois Gained a lot of weight?

17:55 Adam Put a lot of weight on. And it's so funny that when it lays on its side, its paws don't even really come together, they just stick out.

18:03 Elisabeth Harnois Oh, that's awesome.

18:04 Adam No, it looks like someone knocked over a sawhorse.

18:08 Elisabeth Harnois A sausage with legs.

18:09 Adam If you just took a piñata and knocked it on its side, it just lay there on its side, my dog doesn't look like it's laying down, it looks like it tipped over. It's like someone's got a forklift, get it back on its feet. But if I would just carry this dog everywhere, it would be awesome. And that would be it. I'm carrying it. It's a lap dog. I don't care, it's 80 pounds, it's going on my lap.

18:28 Drew As Stewie says, if it bends a biscuit, a little more to contend with.

18:33 Adam Well, that's true. That's true. Kelly?

18:36 Yes.

18:37 Adam You're 24?

18:38 Caller Yes.

18:39 Adam What's up?

18:40 Caller Hi. First, I just want to say that I'm a person who fears intimacy and I sort of hit an emotional wall when it comes to guys like being close.

18:53 Drew Well, you know what that means to us.

18:56 Caller No, I don't.

18:58 Adam Dad, dad left. Dad died.

19:00 Drew Dad was abusive.

19:01 Adam What happened? Dad died, dad left, dad was abusive.

19:04 Caller No, well, he was, yeah, he was pretty hardcore.

19:07 Drew Yeah, that's called abusive.

19:09 Caller Yes, and I was adopted. I did spend like the first seven years with my mother and then I stopped.

19:16 Drew Wait, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hang on a second. Yeah, you were with your biological mother for seven years and then adopted?

19:24 Caller Yes.

19:25 Drew And you never knew your biological father?

19:27 Caller No, I did, I did. I had a, I very much had my biological father and his brother and her, his wife adopted me. So I was adopted within the family. So I grew up with my dad.

19:40 Drew Where did your mom go?

19:41 Caller My mom was nutty and so she moved to San Francisco, but I did used to see her and come and visit and I had connections.

19:48 Drew So you had a horrible mom who abandoned you and then an abusive, difficult father.

19:54 Caller Exactly.

19:55 Drew Yeah. Why would you have trouble with intimacy? I don't understand.

19:57 Adam Yeah. Get over it, girl, and move on.

20:00 Drew Well, yeah, of course, Kelly, my God.

20:02 Adam You got to pick yourself up by your own bootstraps and you got to walk it.

20:06 Drew No, no. Here's the way, guys. You got to choose to be closer to people.

20:09 Adam You got to choose to be closer to people and put one foot in front of the other.

20:12 Drew Yeah, no, Kelly, it's impossible. Those mechanisms don't develop with that kind of abuse and abandonment.

20:17 Adam If you ain't moving forward, you're going backward or you're standing still or moving forward slowly or just kind of creeping backwards.

20:25 Caller I moved here three years ago. I moved here three years ago to live with my mother. I need to find out that she came out that she was a lesbian. And I sort of panicked a little bit and thought, oh my God, am I? Even though I have always fantasized about men, I fantasized about my wedding day and stuff like that. I've had a couple of attractions to women and I've kissed them, but I've never had a...

20:50 Adam Kelly, quiet down. Here's what's going on. Your mom's a nutcase. I don't know if she did... It seems like someone who had a problem with substance abuse if they actually leave their seven-year-old and move away. But maybe she just has mental illness.

21:03 Drew It sounds like bipolar addiction, sexual abuse history. Yes. That's that combo.

21:07 Adam Your mom was definitely sexually abused.

21:10 Caller Yes, definitely she was.

21:12 Drew Right. And she's got a drug issue. Wait, wait, wait. Kelly, Kelly. And she's got a drug issue and some bipolar, right? Yeah. Yeah, that's what you're describing, is that person.

21:22 Adam So, oh, by the way, doesn't even say that on the screen, Drew. How would we know?

21:25 Drew All people are the same, Adam. How dare you?

21:27 Adam Everyone's the same. Everyone's the same. Well, Kelly, the point is, I don't care about your question.

21:30 Drew We know what you're dealing with.

21:32 Caller My question is really important to me, though.

21:34 Adam I know, but we don't care that much about it.

21:37 Drew What's your question?

21:38 Caller OK. I started going out, like, I met this guy when I moved here. He's about 12 years older than me. And I tried dating him. We had a good friendship. He had a lot of money. He showed me around the city.

21:50 Drew What's your question?

21:51 Caller I wasn't into him sexually. And I was intimidated and uncomfortable with him. And after about two years, when we would fight, he would start calling me a lesbian. And I kind of feel that I didn't have, like, a full mother figure that I'm a little more certain on my feminine side.

22:11 Drew No, Kelly, you're uncertain on your identity entirely because you didn't have the kind of support and nurturing to need to figure out what you are, who you are, and particularly who you are in a relationship. And so in some a-hole, who you really are not in love with, calls you names, you go, maybe that's what I am, because you really don't know what you are. You have very poor boundaries, very poor sense of self.

22:29 Adam Yeah.

22:30 Drew So, look, you gotta work on this, Kelly.

22:32 Adam And your mom's a mess. Don't try to redeem her.

22:35 Drew None of this has anything to do with your sexual...

22:37 Caller To be suppressed and for my sexuality to change so drastically.

22:42 Drew None of this has anything to do with your sexual orientation. All of this has to do with intergenerational transmission of trauma.

22:49 Caller Do you think my mother is a lesbian? I mean, or do you think that she's just crazy nutty and needs a best friend?

22:55 Adam Hey, Kelly, Kelly. Would you shut up for a second? You gotta rap, baby. You gotta reel it in a little bit. Well, stop your rap because you're rapping your ass off and you don't listen to anybody. Your family's an abortion. It's a disaster. And your mom is the spearhead of that abortion and disaster, alright? Don't worry about her. She's a, she in the, in the, if this was an insurance case, she would be totaled out, alright?

23:24 Drew Her sexual orientation has nothing to do with your, unless she suddenly acts out, if she had acted out you as a kid and sexually abused you, then it would have an impact on you.

23:33 Adam You get yourself some therapy and do some work on, on your horrible childhood and everything else will magically come into focus.

23:40 Right.

23:42 Adam Thank you.

23:42 Drew Elisabeth, yes?

23:43 Elisabeth Harnois D'accord. French for I agree.

23:46 Adam No, Drew just dropped the load in the short. He loves French, he loves everything. So college, college, college.

23:55 Drew Hey, I am still looking for, for the television, my television program, Women Who Have Had Difficulty With Sexual Performance Problems From Medication. Now, yeah, I know Chris is going to be on the show, don't worry. And Birth Control Pills.

24:06 Adam All right. All right. You ready?

24:08 Drew Yeah.

24:08 Adam Keep on. And let me just explain something. We got to take a break. But everyone says, oh, you know, you don't answer the question. Let the person answer the question. That here's the deal. I've been here for too long to wait through everyone's crap. I know what the problem is. We know what the problem with Kelly was the second she called. I don't care what a question. No, she's not a lesbian. And we can't answer that question anyway. She was an abuse victim. She needs to look into that. Everyone, here's the thing. Everybody wants to put wallpaper up on on on rotted walls is really what it is. And they're saying to me as a contractor, someone who knows about houses, I want to put wallpaper up and and they're explaining and they're describing a house whose walls are probably.

24:55 Drew Let's talk about the wall.

24:56 Adam And I'm saying, no, no, no, no, no, you got to take it down to the studs. You got to put a vapor barrier up. You got to hang some more sheetrock, you know, prime it and tape it and mud it. And then you can and they're like, well, I'm not I'm asking a wallpaper question. And everyone's like, well, just answer the wallpaper question. No, I'm not going to. It's a waste of my time. You're asking so-called experts how to do this. We're going to explain it to you. It's not wallpaper.

25:21 Drew It doesn't make sense to talk about the wallpaper.

25:22 Adam That's what I'm saying. That's what that is. And we get a lot of wallpaper questions and we got to get it back to the Bear Studs. Yes, Drew?

25:29 Drew Absolutely.

25:30 Adam Thank you.

25:31 Drew Bear Studs.

25:32 Adam Bear Studs. That would be a good Vegas review.

25:35 Drew Yes.

25:36 Adam Adam Corolla in Bear Studs on ice. Ladies, line up.

25:42 Drew On ice.

25:43 Adam Yeah.

25:43 Elisabeth Harnois Bear Studs on ice.

25:44 Drew That's brutal.

25:45 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Makes the nipples pointy, but it's tough on the junk.

25:49 Drew Well, you've got all that extra insulation.

25:51 Adam On my nipples?

25:53 Drew Well, you've got it there too, but the hair and stuff.

25:54 Adam I don't have that much. I don't have a real hairy chest. I don't have the hairy on my back either, but do get a little around the ass. Just a little.

26:03 Drew Just a little.

26:04 Adam All right. Drew, Drew must be in love with Elisabeth, by the way, because he never talks about my hairy ass until a beautiful young lady.

26:12 Drew Oh, is that right? Is that true?

26:13 Adam Drew, you got to think. Drew likes Elisabeth. I mean, I mean, it's, I know it's, it's look, it's healthy. Hey, it's nothing wrong with that.

26:22 Elisabeth Harnois I appreciate it.

26:23 Adam You're both, you know, God's creatures.

26:26 Drew The interesting thing is my wife likes her too though.

26:29 Elisabeth Harnois Let's keep that in the equation there.

26:31 Adam Your wife would bring Elisabeth into the bedroom. Oh yes. Oh yeah.

26:34 Elisabeth Harnois That's why she wants to kick her.

26:36 Adam No, and then kick through his ass right out. That's what I'm saying.

26:39 Drew Could happen.

26:39 Adam Elisabeth Harnois is here tonight. She is from Point Pleasant, Thursday nights, nine o'clock on Fox. We'll take a quick break, be right back after this.

26:49 Caller 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1.

26:52 Caller Loveline will be right back.

26:55 Loveline is brought to you by Advance Auto Parts. We're ready in advance.

27:01 Adam There, buddy, it's Loveline. That's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Elisabeth Harnois is here tonight. Let's call her Harnois, which is much more attractive sounding than Harnois.

27:16 Elisabeth Harnois That's the way it looks when you look at it.

27:18 Adam But this is the French pronunciation?

27:21 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah, that's the French pronunciation.

27:23 Adam So it's Harnois?

27:24 Elisabeth Harnois Just to add to the snobbery of-

27:26 Adam Yes, very uppercrushed.

27:30 Drew Here's a good, Wesleyan, Arnois.

27:32 Elisabeth Harnois You know, I'm just trying to keep a theme evening.

27:34 Drew Riverside.

27:35 Adam Wow.

27:36 Elisabeth Harnois How oxymoronic.

27:37 Adam Yeah.

27:38 Elisabeth Harnois I don't know.

27:39 Adam It's called overcompensation, Drew. It must be. Yeah, I went to junior college, but I learned that word early. Elisabeth is in a little something called Point Pleasant. Drew and Drew's Wife's favorite show. Drew's Wife sent Drew armed with a camera. A camera.

27:53 Drew I mean, have you ever seen me in here with a camera?

27:56 Adam No, I have not.

27:57 Drew It's never happened.

27:58 Adam No.

27:58 Drew We've yet to use it. And she as a devil, as a Satan kills doctors.

28:02 Adam Oh, really?

28:03 Drew Oh, yeah.

28:03 Adam Wow.

28:04 Elisabeth Harnois Oh, yeah, that's true. And priests.

28:07 Adam Fox, by the way, Thursday Nights, nine o'clock. All right.

28:11 Drew And I'll let me be honest, I hate devil shows. You know what I mean? We grew up in the 70s when everything was about the devil.

28:17 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah. Yeah.

28:18 Drew And I like this show.

28:19 Elisabeth Harnois Cool. Thank you.

28:20 Adam Yeah. But love those devil songs where they compare the woman to the devil. Witchy, witchy, devilish, rambling woman. I fixed the coffee maker, by the way.

28:31 Elisabeth Harnois It's called instant now, right?

28:32 Adam No, no, I thickened it up. I worked it out. Yeah.

28:37 Elisabeth Harnois I don't know. I don't want to know what you did to thicken it up.

28:40 Drew It changed the way the water goes into them.

28:42 Elisabeth Harnois I just had a little flower.

28:43 Adam Yeah, I changed the-

28:43 Caller A little flower.

28:45 Drew A little flower.

28:46 Elisabeth Harnois It's gravy now.

28:48 Adam Here's my point. I ain't the janitor, but I knew before I looked at it, there had to be a little regulator switch on the back of the thing. Sure enough, there was. Drew, would it take me nine seconds?

28:59 Drew Maybe 12.

29:00 Adam Maybe 12?

29:01 Drew To see it all coming out the way you wanted it. Yeah.

29:03 Adam Yeah. There it is. That's what I'm talking about. Here's the thing. You think TV people are stupid. Where do you meet radio people? Colossally dumb. Yeah. Mega dumb. Yeah, not Chris.

29:19 Elisabeth Harnois I immediately look at the other side of the room.

29:21 Adam No, no. But look, here's the whole thing. Here's my estimation. If you're like a 40 watt bulb, come on out to radio. You'll be hailed as a genius. It'll be perfect.

29:34 Drew You'll be running the place.

29:35 Adam Yeah, don't go somewhere and get out. Don't become a garbage man or something. Be called stupid. Come out to the radio. You'll be a genius. Again, present company excluded. Bob?

29:46 Hello.

29:47 Adam 25?

29:48 Yep. Ideally, would it be better to smoke marijuana or ingest it like pot brownies?

29:54 Drew Ideally, in what sense? You mean in terms of avoiding potential adverse medical consequences?

29:59 Like bronchitis has.

30:01 Drew Yeah. Obviously, if you eat it, you'll avoid the bronchitis. But if you smoke it, you've got something that's more difficult to dose. It's slower onset.

30:08 Adam You eat it, you mean?

30:09 Drew What'd I say?

30:09 Adam Smoke it.

30:10 Drew You smoke it. If you eat it, it's slower onset, higher levels of intoxication usually. And it lasts a lot longer and more difficult to control. And you don't get the bronchitis. Elisabeth hates eating the pot brownies. It's just only the bong. And the higher the dose, and to some extent, the more rapidly that dose is achieved. But primarily with pot, the higher the dose, the more the neurological effects. So pot brownie, while you might avoid the bronchitis, you may end up with more of the addiction and more of the neurological problems.

30:42 Adam Here's the thing about the pot brownie. It's a train that doesn't stop for about five hours. And sometimes you're really enjoying the view. Other times you'd like to get off after about an hour and you can't. It's going too fast. You know what I'm saying, brother?

30:56 Caller Oh, yeah.

30:57 Is it like a poison to our bodies? Is it like Bapro liver? Like either way you smoke it or ingest it?

31:03 Drew Bob, you keep wanting not to address the fact that it's bad for your brain. And that's the one thing you can't avoid.

31:13 So it is. So now is it bad for our brain? Is it also bad for like our organs, like the liver too? No, not liver.

31:21 Drew It's the lung, the lung thing, the bronchitis.

31:23 Adam Bob, nosh away.

31:26 All right?

31:27 Adam See you at the JC.

31:29 How about the eyes? Why do they get red? Is it because we just stare and don't blink?

31:33 Drew No, no, no, no. There's vasodilatation.

31:35 Adam Now I'm going. Junior college, Bob?

31:38 High school.

31:40 Adam Oh, high school.

31:40 Drew No junior college.

31:41 Adam Still in high school? What are you working on?

31:45 Caller GE.

31:47 Adam GED.?

31:48 Or that diploma you get for high school. What is it? The GDE.?

31:52 Adam I don't even know. No, no, no.

31:53 The abbreviation for it.

31:55 Drew Were you in jail or something for a while?

31:56 What was that?

31:57 Adam Bob's BSA.

31:58 Drew I know. Were you in jail or something for a while?

32:00 It's the GED though.

32:00 Drew Can you please point that out?

32:01 Criminal.

32:03 Drew Not a criminal.

32:04 Adam Wait, you're 25.

32:06 Caller Yeah.

32:07 Adam What happened?

32:11 Caller I don't know. Okay. I think the marijuana got me caught to me.

32:15 Drew All right.

32:15 Adam Well, keep eating that weed. I think it's bogus now.

32:18 Drew Yeah, it sounds bogus.

32:19 Caller We don't know about the eyes. Is it just because we don't blink or is it just...

32:22 Drew No, nothing about not blinking. There's a vasodilatation of the vessels in the eyes.

32:27 Adam Bob was uber creepy.

32:30 Caller Yeah.

32:32 Adam Super, super creep.

32:33 Caller Yeah.

32:34 Drew Dude, dude, dude, dude.

32:35 Adam Yeah. Yeah. He's one of these. He's one of these guys that freaks chicks out and doesn't know why.

32:42 Drew He reminds me of the guy that stole a head.

32:45 Adam You remember that guy?

32:46 Drew Yeah.

32:46 Adam He stole a head from the morgue.

32:49 Elisabeth Harnois Do you think that was authentic?

32:52 Adam Here's the whole thing about that.

32:54 Elisabeth Harnois You guys can tell pretty quickly.

32:55 Adam It could have been both. It could have been a super creepy guy making a bogus phone call.

33:01 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah. Well, clearly creepy, but whether it was an actual story.

33:05 Adam Oh, yeah. Yeah. Nicole?

33:08 Elisabeth Harnois Hello?

33:09 Me?

33:09 Adam You're 18? Yeah.

33:11 Caller Yeah. Hi. Okay.

33:13 Caller Wow.

33:14 Caller I can't believe I'm talking to you guys. I listen to you every night.

33:16 Caller You're my favorite.

33:17 Caller Thanks. Well, I have a friend. Well, he was my boyfriend for a long time, but we're still pretty good friends, and he's coming home from college for spring break. And my prediction is that he's probably going to want to have sex, and I will too, but I don't know how, like, how.

33:41 Drew If I need a little more information, were you guys sexually active when you're boyfriend, girlfriend?

33:46 Caller Yeah.

33:47 Drew Why did you break up?

33:49 Caller Because he went off to college.

33:50 Drew Does he have another girlfriend out there?

33:53 Caller He says no, but then I think he has a girl that he has sex with a lot, and so. All right.

33:59 Drew And has he put you on notice he's coming out here and expecting to be sexual with you?

34:04 Caller No, I just kind of expect it.

34:07 Drew Is something you want to do?

34:09 Caller Kind of, but then also at the same time, I don't, because.

34:13 Drew All right. What is your question, then?

34:16 Caller My question is, I don't, should I? I mean, like, do you think it's bad?

34:22 Adam Hold on a second. Don't we? Do we have any kind of screening process on this show? Phone screener Brian, we have not had a call from a chick with big cans in like nine years on this godforsaken show. It's like a homework hotline and Tiger Beat Forum here. I got a guy we used to date. He's coming home soon. I kind of want to have sex with him, but kind of not too. So my question is, should I kind of have sex with him or not kind of have sex with him? Is he having sex with someone else? He says he's not, but I think maybe, who cares? You're 18. He's your old boyfriend. You want to get with him, get with him. We need some calls.

35:04 Drew Yes.

35:05 Adam No big jugs. Nothing. Phone screener Brian, are you allergic to big cans? Is that what it is? We used to get big can calls on this show. We never get them anymore.

35:16 Caller What's the question with the big cans?

35:18 Adam Please, please summon them.

35:19 Drew What's the question about them?

35:21 Elisabeth Harnois What's the big can call?

35:22 Drew Should they be reduced?

35:23 Adam Anything.

35:23 Elisabeth Harnois Oh, just about boozies and boozies.

35:25 Adam Something.

35:26 Drew Something to entertain Adam.

35:28 Adam Yes. Oh my gosh. 18 year olds who don't know where to hump their boyfriend for the 393rd time or just keep it at 392?

35:40 Drew I say to Cole, you keep it at 392 because you're not going to go anywhere with this unless you really just feel you can keep it as an isolated incident and not get attached to the guy. Then go ahead.

35:48 Caller Nicole.

35:49 Drew Yeah.

35:50 Adam Sorry, Drew was so hard on you. You need to find a guy. You're something. Something's going on. You have a big ass. What's going on? Something's going on with you.

36:00 Caller I don't have a big ass.

36:01 Adam All right. Why don't you find yourself a nice guy in the city that you live in and have a relationship?

36:08 Caller I don't know. I guess I could.

36:10 Adam Yeah, do that.

36:11 Drew I think you'll be more. I think you haven't gotten over this guy yet. The guy that's coming home.

36:15 Adam No, because he dumped you.

36:17 Drew Yeah. And he took off. He took off.

36:19 Adam Him going to college.

36:20 Caller Yeah, he took off, but he didn't, yeah.

36:22 Drew Okay.

36:22 Adam No, he broke up with you.

36:24 Drew He's done. Where's he in college?

36:26 Caller Cal Poly.

36:27 Adam Look, here's the thing. You're not terribly far apart. Here's what I'm saying. Drew, you're a 19, 18, 19-year-old guy.

36:36 Drew And you're really into the girl.

36:37 Adam You're really head over. You got Elisabeth over here.

36:41 Drew She's going to Wesley and I, whatever. You figure out a way to do it.

36:44 Adam You're building a monorail to her dorm room. I would build one of those slides that they would use on Wild Wild West.

36:50 Drew Yes.

36:51 Adam One of those cables with the pulley on it.

36:53 Drew Yes.

36:53 Adam Slide. That's how you know it was sex time. You'd be like watching two girls here in the distance.

37:01 Caller Uh-oh.

37:02 Drew It comes out. Coming in feet first.

37:04 Caller Feet first.

37:05 Adam Roommate opens the window and is going to fly right through a slide right through the room right into the dorm.

37:09 Drew And that was from Wisconsin.

37:11 Adam That's all the way into Wisconsin. Is that where Wesley is?

37:14 Drew It's in Connecticut.

37:15 Adam Connecticut. Pow.

37:16 Drew From Los Angeles.

37:17 Adam From Los Angeles. I built the cable.

37:20 Yeah.

37:22 Adam You don't know how attractive that pulley cable thing was. And there used to be a lot of that.

37:27 Drew Well, James West did it all the time.

37:28 Adam Yeah. But any time a guy got trapped on a roof, it was like, how do I get off the roof? And then he would take his tie or take a strap, his belt. He'd throw it around a phone wire or something. There's magically some wire going from the roof down the ground. Throw the belt around the thing. And here's the other thing about TV shows. When people install lighting fixtures such as chandeliers, they basically put them up there to hold their own weight. It's not good enough for you to dive off of from the third story grab, fight it out with another guy and then swing over to the second story balcony on. Go into your kitchen, try hanging on the light fixtures, see how that goes. Yeah, it's all coming off. I built houses. I don't even want you opening doors. I've hung. You start swinging on stuff and hanging on stuff and jumping on stuff. It's coming right down. Yeah. But somehow, the chandeliers especially, pow, you do a lot of swing on those until you have to shoot it and have it drop on the guy. Then one shot brings it down. Easy. Easy. Yeah. Even though there's a chain and a wire, theoretically running through it. That's another move. Pow, you fire the thing. Chandelier comes down and it just captures you all like it's the band on a barrel. All locked in, can't get out of the chandelier. Still in the chandelier.

38:43 Drew No quicksand.

38:43 Adam All right. Here's a boob call for you. Oh, everyone are famous giant boobs. Why doesn't, why doesn't she? How dare you, Brian? Yeah, let's see. Meg? Yeah.

38:58 Drew Meg, you tried to bail Adam out, right? That's why you're calling?

39:01 Yeah.

39:02 Drew Yeah.

39:03 Adam Everybody in your family has big boobs.

39:06 Yeah, like all my aunts and stuff, and my mom, my sister, everyone.

39:11 Adam Oh, hold on. Her big boobs are causing her low back pain. Now the mind, the mind reels at how many big boob big boobs phone screener Brian sent packing over the last five years.

39:26 Drew In three seconds, we get three calls.

39:28 Adam I make the decree we need more big boob calls and hence big boob calls.

39:32 Drew Now you're angry.

39:33 Caller You're driving down the streets talking about it.

39:35 Adam I'm angry. Yeah, before I was I was PO. Now I'm livid. All right. So Jessica, we got it. We got to have a serious talk for Jessica.

39:49 Caller Yes. Yes.

39:51 Adam Big boobs are causing lower back pain.

39:54 Caller Well, I don't know. I've just been having lower back pain lately and I do have big boobs.

39:59 Adam What are what are you coming in at?

40:02 Caller Depends on the bra brand, but it's a D or a double T.

40:06 Adam What number?

40:07 Caller Bouncy, Bouncy.

40:08 Adam Elizabeth's very casual about that. Yeah.

40:12 Caller Thirty six.

40:13 Adam All right. How's the rest of you doing?

40:16 Caller Pretty good.

40:18 Adam Little beat there. I'll tell you, she's calling from Boise. Really? Because I tacked on 10 pounds for the beat, I tacked on a 12 for the Boise.

40:28 Yeah, I work at Gold's Gym.

40:31 Adam Oh, you do? Yeah, but you know, a lot of people like a lot of, you know, a high percentage of gym owners smoke, for instance.

40:39 Drew Right.

40:40 Adam So this could just be one of those things. What do you do over there? Refill the vending machines?

40:45 Caller No, I work in the kids club.

40:47 Adam OK.

40:48 Caller I babysit the kids.

40:49 Adam How tall are you?

40:51 Caller I am five nine.

40:52 Adam How much you weigh?

40:54 Caller One fifty.

40:55 Adam One fifty. Hold on. I had to do the radio man. Five nine one fifty.

40:59 Elisabeth Harnois That's good.

41:00 It's good.

41:02 Adam Drew, what's one times three?

41:04 Drew Three.

41:04 Adam Three and then one times nine. So one times anything is what that number is. OK.

41:09 Drew Remember, Tim, Tom Bermane had that great mathematical formula he used. Using partial differentials for you.

41:17 Adam This guy spent fifteen grand to come over here and sit in on the show. Ironically, yeah, now he's back in he's in the Piner Valleys in Massachusetts. All right. Here's my point. We got to take a break. But then we're going to get back with Jessica. You'll calculate her actual you can't do the radio math on her five nine one fifty.

41:39 Elisabeth Harnois I think that's pretty good.

41:40 Drew Elizabeth Harnois, that's what she admits on the radio, though.

41:43 Elisabeth Harnois The actual the actual calculation doesn't matter really, though. It's like it's just for you, right?

41:48 Adam It's for a good point.

41:49 Drew Good point.

41:49 Elisabeth Harnois It's just the mental image that you're creating.

41:52 Adam Well, how dare you. And let me say this. I am I am an artist and the radio is my canvas. And our listeners are the viewers at my art exhibition.

42:06 Drew Yeah. You got to get them to see your vision.

42:09 Adam That's right.

42:09 Drew Yes.

42:09 Adam That's right. All right. All right. All right. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. Everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-M-E-1-9-1-er. Tonight, we're sitting here with Elisabeth Harnois.

42:56 Caller Hello.

42:57 Adam Who you knew as Elisabeth Harnois at the first half of the show.

43:00 Caller At the beginning of the show.

43:02 Adam But I've learned, I've changed, I've moved on. You can find her on Point Pleasant on Fox. Thursday nights, nine o'clock, Drew and his old lady sit back and rub one out every week to the show.

43:16 Caller Rub one out.

43:17 Adam They love this show. Drew is such a fan, he brought his camera in.

43:21 Caller Yeah.

43:21 Adam And look, if you were to come in here complaining about the Jews and spitting tobacco, Drew still would have been enamored. But now with the French last name and the Wesleyan College, Drew is over the moon. Can't get enough.

43:38 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah.

43:39 Adam I'm India too, don't get me wrong.

43:41 Glad.

43:43 Elisabeth Harnois Well, thanks. Glad to be here. I love the show. It's fun.

43:46 Adam Everyone's India. And your boyfriend.

43:48 Elisabeth Harnois Everyone in this room, all three of us.

43:50 Adam Chris is India. That's right.

43:52 Caller I'm Inder.

43:53 Adam Boyfriend, not good enough for you. I've decided this.

43:56 Caller Oh, I'm sorry.

43:56 Adam Yeah. How old are you?

43:57 Elisabeth Harnois I'm 25.

43:59 Adam How old is he?

44:01 Elisabeth Harnois He's 34.

44:03 Adam Oh, maybe Scott's.

44:04 Elisabeth Harnois Okay, no analyzing me.

44:06 Too late.

44:07 Adam Done and done.

44:07 Drew And you live out here?

44:09 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah. Well, we just, we both moved from New York.

44:12 Drew You guys met in New York.

44:13 Adam Producer or struggling something?

44:16 Elisabeth Harnois I allow him to have his privacy about who he is and what he does.

44:19 Adam Uh-oh, we must know his name then.

44:21 Elisabeth Harnois No, you don't actually.

44:22 Adam No, then who cares?

44:23 Elisabeth Harnois No, he's just a shy, shy, shy one.

44:25 Caller Who cares?

44:27 Elisabeth Harnois That's how he wants it.

44:29 Adam Artist of some type? Musician?

44:31 Elisabeth Harnois Somewhat, no.

44:32 Adam No?

44:34 Elisabeth Harnois In the shower, maybe.

44:35 Adam But not in the business, huh? In the industry? Uh-oh.

44:38 Elisabeth Harnois Somewhat.

44:38 Adam Producer.

44:40 Drew Yeah, producer.

44:41 Adam Who's driving that Jag out there in the parking lot, by the way?

44:43 Drew That's what I was wondering. I saw that too.

44:44 Elisabeth Harnois It's not mine. Not yet.

44:46 Adam All right. Because that would be it for Drew. He would plots.

44:50 Elisabeth Harnois That would be one more.

44:51 Drew Is that what that's called?

44:52 Adam Drew would officially plots if that was your Jag in the parking lot. Yeah. I'd do like a little peak of plots, but I wouldn't fully plots. I would just crown.

45:02 Drew You have not much juice left from your usual daily plots.

45:05 Adam I've not plotted off yet today. Thank you very much. You're very busy.

45:09 Drew We got one minute. Let's finish with one minute.

45:11 Adam All right. Boobs. Yeah. Boobs. Jessica.

45:15 Drew Yes.

45:16 Adam All right. So 23 big jugs.

45:19 Drew You did the radio math and the answer is?

45:21 Adam I see five, nine, one, 50. I have five, eight, and 13, 16. So almost five, nine.

45:28 Drew Oh, good. She was close.

45:29 Adam One, 61.

45:30 Drew Okay. All right. So here's the deal, Jessica. The low back pain, you work with children. Are you lifting and that sort of thing?

45:37 Caller Um, it has to be.

45:39 Drew Yeah, it has to be. You're lifting kids, you're lifting equipment around. So and you are somewhat overweight, which is not good for your back either way.

45:45 Caller So you have to consider that the boobs are big, they weigh a lot.

45:49 Adam Yeah. Yeah. That's good for an extra two and a half pounds.

45:53 Drew I'm not saying she's fat or that she's obese, but she's, she's enough that it could affect her low back.

45:58 Elisabeth Harnois Five nine. What is the, what is the good thing?

46:00 She should be around.

46:02 Caller I work out on a regular basis.

46:03 Elisabeth Harnois The muscle weighs more than fat.

46:05 Drew That's fine. I'm not being critical. I'm just saying that there are the, what I'm saying is I'm accumulating other possibilities of why you might be having the low back pain that typically with the breast, it's neck and shoulder pain, deep bra strap grooves, that sort of thing, curvature of the back and neck and yes, low back can be part.

46:22 Caller But the low back pain has been worse.

46:24 Adam All right. So here's the, here's the thing, Jessica. You can consult the plastic surgeon. I'm sure there are tons of them in Boise. You can't swing a cat without hitting a plastic surgeon.

46:35 Drew My point is first maybe see a physical therapist about dealing with the back.

46:39 Adam Why don't you talk to somebody at the gym and ask them, ask one of the trainer guys, lower, like give me good exercise strength in the lower back. And you do that one. See what they see, how it goes for a while. And you know, I sound like a puss, but do a lot of stretching. Hang upside down, do all that stuff. It's really good for your back. You know, do all that yoga there, yeah? Yeah. Mm-hmm. All right, we're gonna take ourselves a little break. We'll be back for a nice long set after this. Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191.

47:51 Drew I would give Adam some education about education tonight. We've double teamed him.

47:55 Adam Yeah, awesome. Elisabeth Harnois is here. She is from Point Pleasant Thursday nights, nine o'clock on Fox. Drew's wife has her picked as one of the breakout stars of the millennium.

48:11 Drew Of the millennium, yeah.

48:12 Elisabeth Harnois Who else did she call, just so I can...

48:15 Drew Jim Carrey. Cool. We used to watch Living Color and she'd go, that white guy. I'm telling you, that guy's going to be a huge charmer.

48:22 Caller That goofy white guy? What are you talking about?

48:24 Adam She picked him nine months ago.

48:25 Drew No, no. She picked him early in the Living Color run. Cool.

48:33 Elisabeth Harnois One out of...

48:35 Drew No, she picked him.

48:36 Elisabeth Harnois She picked him.

48:36 Drew All right. Cool.

48:37 Elisabeth Harnois I appreciate it.

48:38 Adam You think she'd use a little of that radar before she got married. You know what I mean?

48:42 Drew Well, she had to hone it. It took a little while.

48:44 Adam All right. Tim?

48:47 Caller Yeah.

48:49 Adam You're 14?

48:51 Caller Yeah. Oh, Tim.

48:52 Drew Boy, we got some vivacious callers tonight, Adam.

48:55 Adam Let's just say it. Reel it in. It's late.

48:57 Caller A 600-pound woman who is 40 years old.

48:59 Adam Oh, hold on a second. We're doing a little... You know what it is. We're doing a little something called Germany or Florida. You guys tell us the bizarre story, and we guess, is it Germany or is it Florida?

49:12 Drew Where the story comes from. That's where all the weird stuff comes from.

49:13 Adam I think our screeners tell them... When I say screeners, I mean screener, who's allergic to big cans, evidently, just tells them, get to the story, which sometimes they do a little too good a job of, but they don't even say hi. They're just like, oh, a 56 year old man. Okay. Tim?

49:36 Drew Hang on, hang on Tim, one second. I want to hear the Germany or Florida theme song. I haven't heard it in weeks.

49:42 Adam I do miss the Germany or Florida theme song. Anderson, are you poised? Are you ready? All right.

49:52 Drew He's drunk tonight I think.

49:53 Adam Drunk? He's at least drunk.

49:55 Caller I got a pen in my mouth.

49:56 Drew Oh, okay.

49:57 Adam Yeah.

49:58 Things are sick and twisted from too much sun and Nazis, sex, meth and death fetishes. Both of them have got these. Guaranteed not the Boria, Germany or Florida.

50:08 Adam There we go.

50:09 Caller Tim? Okay, go.

50:11 Adam Go.

50:12 Caller A 600 pound woman who was 40 years old and was literally stuck to her couch, was having trouble breathing. Authorities estimate she had been on the couch anywhere from two to five years. Fire and rescue crews faced what seemed to be an impossible mission. Everyone going inside had to wear protective gear. The stench was so powerful they had to blast in fresh air. They couldn't get her out the front door and they had to cut plywood since a normal stretcher wouldn't work. An ambulance was too small so they brought in a trailer to get her out. Using the planks they loaded the woman on the trailer, still attached to the couch, removing her would be too painful since her body was grafted to the fabric. After years of staying put, her skin would literally become one with the sofa and had to be surgically removed. She was taken to the hospital where doctors removed her from the couch but she died in spite of all the attempts to save her life.

51:03 Adam Mm, tragic.

51:04 Drew There are a lot of stories like that out there. I had one when I was a resident, the one when I was about 500 pounds, similar. And overnight she diureased 100 pounds, like fluid. We got 100 pounds of fluid off her. She was in the hard phase.

51:18 Adam When you brought her in?

51:19 Drew We brought her in. We got her off the furniture and stuff. And the furniture bores into them. The springs and things, when they have springs, bore into their body and stuff.

51:26 Adam Wow.

51:27 Drew I was going to ask how that works.

51:28 Adam It's like Nightmare on Elm Street.

51:30 Drew And there's oftentimes a little vermin and stuff living around.

51:33 Caller Don't listen to Drew.

51:35 Adam He's lying.

51:36 Drew And anyway, this one woman, we had to get special bed equipment and stuff, these special beds, because she'd break, literally break, the regular bed. But the interesting thing was we got 100 pounds of fluid off her overnight.

51:46 Adam How do you get 100 pounds of fluid off her?

51:48 Drew Well, that's the interesting question. With a powerful diuretic.

51:52 Adam Why a powerful? Why do you give her a powerful diuretic?

51:55 Drew She was in heart failure.

51:55 Adam So if someone is having heart failure, you need to get the fluid off.

51:58 Drew Yeah, you get my diuretic.

51:59 Adam Because the heart is working too hard with the fluid?

52:01 Drew Yeah, there's a pump. It's not working. It's over the too much burden, too much volume, too much pressure and volume in the ventricle.

52:07 Adam Or is it because the blood has a higher content of fluid?

52:13 Drew Why does she get...

52:14 Adam Why is the pump working hard?

52:15 Drew Because the pump starts failing, so it's not pumping enough forward and starts backing up behind.

52:20 Adam Right, but why does the extra fluid in the person cause that to do it?

52:27 Drew It causes the pump because the heart has stretch forces in it and the muscle fibers have to cross optimally and if you stretch them too far apart with volume and pressure, the muscle can't pump it forward and it gets worse.

52:40 Adam So there's too much pressure around it.

52:42 Drew No, no, inside, in the ventricle.

52:43 Adam But here's what I'm saying. The heart, the blood is passing through the heart, right?

52:48 Drew And it's optimally performing when the muscle is crossing, muscle fibers are crossing.

52:54 Adam Right. I'm asking, is it is the if you have a lot of extra fluid in you, that starts pulling that apart. Will why does it will you have extra blood in you? No, the same amount of blood is a does a 500 pound person have seven pints of blood just like a 110 pound person? Elizabeth is shaking her head.

53:17 Drew Drew, you better be right here. I'm sure that's not right.

53:19 Adam You got to have more, right?

53:20 Drew You got to have more. You got to have what's called a larger volume distribution.

53:23 Adam Does a dehydrated person have a lesser volume of blood than a person that's hydrated?

53:28 Drew You're talking about blood, the circulating fluid. Yes, there's less circulating fluid. There may be not necessarily more red blood cells. Right.

53:37 Adam Well, I just mean if you drain somebody of blood that was dehydrated, you would get less volume than if that same person was well hydrated.

53:46 Drew Yes, less volume, yes.

53:47 Adam All right. So it's still not totally clear on the 100 pounds of fluid, although it makes sense to get it out of them.

53:55 Drew The fluid starts exuding into the rest of the body as a bump accumulates behind the pump, and the more fluid, the less the pump is able to do its thing. So more fluid accumulates. Point being, I had a 100-pound little resident, a medical student with me, I'm like, hey, she diurest you overnight.

54:08 Adam That came out of her. Where does it go into, by the way? Have it catheterized?

54:12 Drew Yeah, it's thoroughly catheterized, yeah.

54:14 Adam What else do they arise?

54:16 Drew You just dump the bag regularly in the bag, just take multiple liters of fluid.

54:19 Adam Is it all coming out the urethra? Wow.

54:22 Drew It's good times.

54:23 Adam I'll tell you, do tell.

54:24 Caller It's good times.

54:25 Adam All right. So Tim says, is it Germany or Florida?

54:29 Drew So for some reason, although it sounds totally Florida, and I know that's happened in Florida, I want to say Germany.

54:36 Caller All right.

54:36 Adam Elisabeth?

54:37 Elisabeth Harnois I say Florida.

54:38 Adam I say Florida too, because I think I heard this story a couple weeks or months back. Tim?

54:46 Caller Sorry, Drew. It's Florida.

54:47 Adam All right. Well, there you go.

54:50 Caller All right. Thank you.

54:52 Adam Mr. Instinct, they call them in the hospital. All right, Tim. Thanks for calling out. You'll get nothing. All right. Fantastic. So you actually start growing on the sofa and they peel you off.

55:03 Drew The skin breaks down just a mass.

55:05 Adam Here's the whole thing. They're doing all this stuff where it's like, oh, we have to make special airline seats. We have to make special stretchers and special hospital beds. Let's just go ahead and start making them. People are big. They just make everything heavy duty, make everything huge now.

55:19 Drew Because everyone's supersized?

55:21 Adam I just have this, I'm telling you, I have this feeling that it's a lot of the sweat pants and jogging suits mixed with the huge escalate size SUVs of this. You will grow into your environment.

55:36 Drew Environment?

55:37 Adam No, you will.

55:38 Drew We're going to fill our vehicles. And clothing.

55:40 Adam Well, they tell you a goldfish will get as big as the bull. You know what I'm saying?

55:44 Drew Well said, yes, yes.

55:46 Adam No, here's the thing. Honestly, here's the deal. Put a pair of jeans on that are a little bit snug and go out about your day.

55:55 Drew You don't want to go eat.

55:56 Adam The entire day you're thinking, boy, I gotta lose 10 pounds. I gotta lose 10 pounds. And when you sit down for lunch in these tightish jeans, and I do it, I don't, they're not comfortable, but the ladies demand it. So I will pack myself into some of these. It's a Shemenda fur, usually, sometimes zeppelin. The point is, is I will pack myself in these tight jeans because, again, I'm recognizable. People expect a certain.

56:18 Drew What was the other one? Start with an F.

56:21 Adam I can't say it. Let's see, there's Jordache.

56:24 Drew Jordache, yeah, that was the big one.

56:25 Adam Oh, okay, not with an F.

56:27 Drew There was another one. Shemenda fur.

56:29 Adam All right, here's my point. Put on a pair of snug-fitting jeans and go about your day. See what you eat for lunch. Then the next day, throw on some sweatpants or just some, you know, something with elastic in it.

56:44 Drew And drive to your lunch in an Escalade.

56:46 Adam And hop in the Escalade and we'll see how many times you pass through the drive-thru. And I'll tell you, you see some of the brothers that are like 400 pounds and all they do is wear the Sean John sweat outfit and drive the Escalade with the 22-inch rims, it's unlimited, the size they'll get through. Plus they're black, they never look bad. They just get scarier. Black guys that get big turn into bouncers, white dudes that get big turn into chicks, turn into your mom's friends.

57:15 Drew Pink chicks.

57:16 Adam Yeah, it's like some friend of your mom's from the choir class. Yeah, so that's my point. My point is we're growing into our larger environments. You get into a sports car, you'll feel the seat on your ass, right and left side. And when your ass starts getting fat, every mile you'll feel it. You put pack into some, that's why we didn't have.

57:39 Drew You're telling me to go on a diet, is that what you're saying?

57:41 Adam Well, you got the sports car and you're wearing the tight jeans tonight, probably just because Elizabeth's coming in. But look back, all right, go back to the 70s, late 70s, early 80s, all the chicks wearing the spandex, the guys wearing the designer jeans, chicks wearing the tube tops. Guys, you couldn't have, you didn't see a bunch of Lardos at the disco in 1979.

58:02 Drew No, they all looked like Travolta.

58:04 Adam You had to keep a tight ass packet into those designer jeans. Now, hop right into that sweat outfit, boom, you balloon up. Hell yeah, hell yeah.

58:14 Drew It's a good time.

58:15 Adam And then here's what you can do. Now, if you do wear the tight jeans and you're eating, you're forced to, that's humiliating, unbutton, undo one of the buttons, and that's when you know you got a problem. All right, pack yourself into some tight jeans and see how fast you lose the weight. Paul? Yes? And get yourself like a nice mini or clown car. We should all wear tight designer jeans and drive Shriner's cars.

58:44 Elisabeth Harnois Shriners.

58:45 Adam The heads hanging out of the sunroof. Yeah? You never get fat. You never get fat. But pile into that Escalade feels like you're not big enough.

58:55 Caller Right.

58:55 Adam You get into one of these, you get into one of these Escalades or excursions and you're like, I got to put some weight on. I'm not filling this car out.

59:05 Caller All right. Paul?

59:08 Caller Yes. 24?

59:10 Yes.

59:11 Adam What's up?

59:12 OK, my question is, how is it that I can lower my sex drive to accommodate my girlfriends?

59:19 Adam Girlfriends?

59:20 Caller And hers is generally lower.

59:22 Drew What are you guys actually doing?

59:24 Adam Girlfriends.

59:25 Caller Excuse me?

59:26 Drew How often are you having sex with her?

59:28 Caller Well, at first, it was like every other day. And then just like for the past couple months, she's been having maybe once a week or not even that.

59:39 Drew How long have you been dating?

59:41 Caller About six months.

59:44 Drew Is she on birth control pills?

59:46 Caller Yes.

59:47 Drew Is she maybe having a sex drive problem from that?

59:52 Caller I guess it's a possibility.

59:53 Drew I mean, I've been calling for that all night, as women that have that, because it's a common thing. I think Depo-Provera shot does that all the time. People get vaginal dryness, no sex drive. Some other birth control pills you take by mouth can do the same thing, and certainly antidepressant medicines can do it. Is she on any medication?

1:00:11 Caller For obsessive compulsive disorder, I believe.

1:00:14 Drew All right. And what's the medication she's on? Prozac is one of the leading medications for OCD. And other serotonin drugs like Luvox. What's she on?

1:00:24 Caller I'm not even sure. All right.

1:00:25 Drew Well, that's where her sex drive is going, is down with that. So you might want to talk to a doctor about changing medication. Some of it doesn't affect her sexuality so much. And the other, or, you know, once, twice a week is about normal. Maybe you ought to just kind of take care of yourself the rest of the week if you really care about your girlfriend.

1:00:41 Caller Okay. But is it possible to lower your sex drive? That's my question.

1:00:45 Drew Yeah. You can get on Prozac too.

1:00:46 Adam Yeah.

1:00:47 Drew Yes, it's possible, but it's not something you'd want to mess with.

1:00:50 Adam Well, wait, wait, wait. Do you think there's some sprinkler key in the small of your back that you can just turn counterclockwise and we can reel your spring in a little bit? What do you want to do? What's your plan?

1:01:01 Drew You can take up a yoga or become a ninja.

1:01:06 Adam Yeah. Lower your sex drive by beating off more often.

1:01:12 Drew Or maybe lower your sex drive, but at least focus it elsewhere.

1:01:14 Adam Well, I don't even, yeah. Focus it toward the sake.

1:01:17 Drew I think it is important, though, that people that have psychiatric problems and they're on psychiatric meds, that relationships are a key part of happiness in life, getting over psychiatric conditions. And you should discuss that with your prescribing doctor, that it is affecting it. And, you know.

1:01:31 Adam Shouldn't your doctor give you an earful of that before he puts you on those kinds of meds?

1:01:35 Drew It depends how serious the psychiatric problems are. You know, if it's a level of life-saving nature or keeps you functioning sort of thing.

1:01:41 Adam But either way, if he's going to prescribe those meds, shouldn't they come with this warning?

1:01:46 Drew You would think.

1:01:48 Adam Do people not listen or people just don't have time?

1:01:50 Drew I think the people prescribing are so interested in trying to help them with the problem because it's serious enough you're seeing a psychiatrist that later is when they begin to discuss the nuances, the side effects. First they got to get the syndrome under control. It's just like blood pressure medicine too. I mean, we're like, hey, we got to get this pressure under control and then people come back a month later and say, yeah, I feel like hell.

1:02:09 Adam I'll tell you, I was looking through the USA Today because...

1:02:15 Drew You're looking at college rankings?

1:02:16 Adam I was looking at pictures. They have color pictures in there. A lot of shiny NASCARs and things like that.

1:02:21 Drew So I hope you like that.

1:02:22 Adam Yeah.

1:02:23 Drew And pie diagrams?

1:02:24 Adam Well, they got that pie diagram. Let me tell you the pie diagram I saw. I like anything that has the word pie in it. Originally, when I said pie diagram, I said, wow, that's right. And then it turned out it didn't actually involve pie. It was just sectioned off like a pie and no one ever told me that. But anyway, they do that snapshot in the bottom left-hand corner of the USA Today with the most inane nonsensical BS you've ever heard in your life and have screamed many times. Look, you got nothing. Put a picture of a missing kid. It's like once in a while you're looking through the funnies. And yeah, let's see what's going on on Family Circle. Four frames later, oh, you had nothing. I understood. Oh, you had nothing. You have no joke. Put a missing kid in there. Look, if you got a joke, feel free to write it down. But if you don't, don't pretend like you do. You're wasting everyone's time. And same thing if you have something interesting. If you have that little snapshot thing in USA today and there's something interesting in there, by all means print it, except for you never seem to do. There's even have anything interesting. They had a couple days ago, they had people's comfort food. This was a pie diagram of percentage of people and where they get their comfort food. Not what their comfort food is, but where they get it. Here's the part I like. It's like 27% make it and 43% buy it and 18% have their mom make it. And then there's that 8% that don't know. Now here's what I like. It's not that they don't know their comfort food. They don't know where they get it. You don't know where the ho-ho comes from or you don't know where mom's pineapple cake comes from or you don't know where it comes from. Let's see if we can get to the bottom of this. Is it in a wrapper?

1:04:16 Drew Did you go to the closet and retrieve it?

1:04:19 Adam Yeah, which would be an answer. I mean, I just like the small percentage of people, whatever their thing is, they don't.

1:04:25 Elisabeth Harnois A small percentage that doesn't know.

1:04:27 Adam They don't know or they don't have an opinion, which is don't include those people.

1:04:31 Elisabeth Harnois Oh yeah, don't even put it on the graph.

1:04:32 Drew As you and I know, there's so much, people are so primitive, so primitive.

1:04:37 Adam These are like Easter Island primitive.

1:04:40 Caller These are carved on a stone.

1:04:42 Adam I know, but here's the thing. The idiots over at USA Today should know better. Yeah. And I like those people like, do you like this or do you like that? I like, you know, everyone divides up and then there's that small percentage like, I don't know, I have no opinion. I don't need to see a percentage of people that have no thoughts. How about you just do that?

1:05:04 Drew How about they just put NA.? That's right. 8% NA.

1:05:07 Adam That's right.

1:05:08 Drew Check it out.

1:05:08 Adam I don't know where their comfort food comes from or don't know what it is or don't care. But that little snapshot thing is the most colossal and ain't waste of time ever. And the only thing that's amusing about is how goddamn bad it is consistently. But again, you have nothing but the missing kid in there. Who's gonna complain about that?

1:05:26 Drew Right.

1:05:27 Adam All right, where were we Drew?

1:05:28 Drew Line one.

1:05:28 Adam What was I complaining about? What was I talking about? I was gonna try to say something.

1:05:32 Drew Big cans again.

1:05:33 Adam Yeah. Nancy?

1:05:35 Caller Hello?

1:05:36 Adam What's up?

1:05:37 Caller Hey, is this Adam?

1:05:40 Adam Yeah.

1:05:41 Caller Man, I gotta ask you, I've had a couple relationships since I was like a teenager, six year ones, right? I'm 30 years old now. I need a hot Jewish.

1:05:52 Drew Martin, hey, yo, Nancy.

1:05:56 Adam Drop the F, mom.

1:05:57 Caller Ooh.

1:05:59 Adam She needs a hot Jew.

1:06:01 Drew That's what she said. She's smart, she said.

1:06:06 Adam But no, she's not Jewish.

1:06:08 Drew She didn't sound it.

1:06:10 Adam Jewish chick wouldn't drop the F-bomb that quickly.

1:06:12 Drew Why does she want somebody Jewish?

1:06:15 Adam I think she's done with the biker, rebel, cowboy phase of her life and just wants someone with a nappy hair is going to provide.

1:06:22 Drew No, she figures very few Jewish methodics.

1:06:25 Adam Oh, interesting. She may think I'm a Jew too.

1:06:28 Caller Yeah, yeah.

1:06:29 Adam Nancy, do you think I'm Jewish?

1:06:33 Caller I've gathered as much. When you guys are hot, you're hot.

1:06:38 Drew You and your people, Adam.

1:06:39 Caller Oh, my Sephardic friends.

1:06:42 Drew All right.

1:06:42 Adam Hey, Nancy, be careful now, sweet. I don't want you to use the F word again on the air.

1:06:48 Caller Sorry about that.

1:06:49 Adam All right. Now, you're not Jewish yourself?

1:06:52 Caller No, I'm not. I'm German and Irish.

1:06:55 Drew Irish is coming through.

1:06:56 Adam Yeah, I can hear the slur. You have a kid in the background?

1:07:00 Caller Oh, no, that's a screaming ass cat.

1:07:03 Adam Oh, really?

1:07:04 Caller Yeah.

1:07:05 Adam All right. So let's see if we can size you up. You want a nice Jewish guy?

1:07:09 Caller That's funny and smart and hates the world.

1:07:11 Adam Okay, but you do understand I'm not Jewish, right?

1:07:15 Caller Okay. Well, yeah, you'll be just fine anyway.

1:07:19 Adam Well, I appreciate you making exception because you exclusively date just to see them. Drew, how dare you?

1:07:26 Caller I don't know, man. I'm 30 years old. I got to narrow it down.

1:07:30 Caller Jewelers?

1:07:31 Adam Oh, yeah. I'm a cool girl. I'm a hot girl.

1:07:33 Caller And I've messed up a couple of times and spent 12 years doing it.

1:07:37 Caller What is that?

1:07:37 Adam Well, you're a hot girl?

1:07:39 Caller Yeah.

1:07:41 Caller Yeah, I make clothes. I wear sexy ass clothes.

1:07:45 Adam Hold on a second. We make a living from reading voices. Yes, Drew.

1:07:51 Drew Yeah. And we can be fooled by certain things.

1:07:54 Adam We're fooled about as much as the Indian who puts his ear to the ground. He says, Myron Horace, coming drag. Once in a while, that guy gets burned. Turns out it was an earthquake. Yeah. But not not too often.

1:08:07 Drew No.

1:08:07 Adam Indian ever wrong in a movie?

1:08:09 Drew No.

1:08:09 Adam Let me ask you this scenario, Drew. Has an Indian ever been spooked in the movie and nothing happened? What's happening with Squanto? Something evil this way come. Turns out nothing. The next day, everyone's fine. Ever?

1:08:23 Drew Never.

1:08:24 Adam Let me ask you this. Percentage of Indians that are wrong in movies versus Indians that may be wrong in real life.

1:08:31 Drew There's a disparity. That's a pie diagram. That's a chasm right there. Let's see that in USA Today.

1:08:37 Adam Yeah. Never wrong in a movie. Real life, I make a couple of mistakes.

1:08:40 Drew With Nancy, it wasn't just the sound of the voice, which already troubled us, but the I'm hot because I wear and make my own sex clothes.

1:08:48 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

1:08:48 Adam Because when the chick busts out the bedazzler and puts her initials in the denim stone wash jacket, I'm in. I don't care what she looks like.

1:08:56 Elisabeth Harnois She has the boobs, though, she said.

1:08:58 Adam Oh, really? Oh, well, I bet she's wearing part of the sofa, though.

1:09:02 Caller Am I part of the sofa?

1:09:04 Adam Nancy.

1:09:05 Caller Yes.

1:09:06 Adam You are there. There may be a thing where you sound so unhot. You have to be hot, like smockers, the jam. Yeah, a little bit, a little bit.

1:09:17 Caller Oh, that's lame.

1:09:18 Adam Okay, how much you weigh?

1:09:20 Caller I weigh 120 pounds.

1:09:22 Adam All right.

1:09:23 Caller I'm 5'9.

1:09:24 Adam 5'9, ooh. What's bra size?

1:09:28 Caller Oh, what the hell is it? It's like a 34B.

1:09:31 Adam B, all right. There's the cat again. You, what do you do? Do you smoke or you dip or what goes on?

1:09:38 Caller I smoke, yes.

1:09:39 Adam Okay.

1:09:40 Caller I am drinking and smoking as we speak.

1:09:42 Drew We get that. We got that. We heard the Irish.

1:09:43 Adam I'm looking for that. And what do you do for a living?

1:09:48 Caller Well, I make clothes.

1:09:51 Drew Where do you sell them?

1:09:52 Caller I fit the ladies. I make custom lingerie, as a matter of fact.

1:09:56 Adam Sweet. All right. That's good.

1:09:58 Caller I like the ladies looking like hoes. I'll temp them out.

1:10:02 Adam That's nice. That's nice.

1:10:03 Drew You can pump out the hoes.

1:10:04 Adam You can, you know where you can find yourself a nice Jewish guy?

1:10:08 Drew Right there in the garment area.

1:10:09 Caller I want someone who can talk to me about physics or something or.

1:10:13 Caller Oh, God. Oh, my God.

1:10:15 Caller Nancy.

1:10:18 Drew I think we're done with her. All right.

1:10:19 Adam But let me just see. She dropped the F-bomb again. But let me just how much stimulating conversation does Nancy Nancy, you can't even refrain from saying for a living, drop the F-bomb twice on the radio.

1:10:33 Drew She needs to talk about the phis- plasma physics. That's where she needs to go.

1:10:38 Adam Yeah.

1:10:38 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

1:10:41 Adam So so she's like she's putting down her ninth Mickey's big mouth and blowing on light in one one butt, one more off the next but and the guy's like, yeah, the sun's mainly just it's all gases. It's burning gas. And she's like, no laughing. Why do you tell me that star we're looking at died millions of years ago? We're just seeing the light that came.

1:11:08 Drew How does that happen?

1:11:10 Adam You are asking me, come here, Moisha, go down on me. Let me let me pop my next Mickey's on your pay. Oh, sir. Thank you, Jim. Get down here. Pull the beard. Just pick a side with the beard. That's all I'm saying. Get irritated down below. She sounds like a delight. Yeah, yeah. I can't help it.

1:11:34 Drew No, no, no, no. You'll kill yourself.

1:11:35 Adam No. Nancy.

1:11:37 Drew Yeah.

1:11:37 Adam Shut up. You can no longer speak on this program because you use the F word twice. I am repenting. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

1:11:46 Caller I repent for my...

1:11:46 Adam Only listen. Just listen to me.

1:11:48 Caller I'm a bad girl.

1:11:49 Adam Listen, you crazy goyum.

1:11:53 Caller Shut up!

1:11:54 Adam Here's your chance. Go on JDate. They got lots of...

1:11:59 Drew JDate?

1:12:00 Adam JDate. Oh yeah.

1:12:00 Drew What's that?

1:12:01 Caller What is that?

1:12:02 Adam Just quiet. Don't talk, Nancy. Just listen. Go on JDate. Find JDate.

1:12:09 Drew Is it jdate.com? Or do you look it up on Google?

1:12:10 Adam I don't know what it is. Just go find JDate. They got a lot of Jews on there. And dye your hair blonde. I'm a Jew.

1:12:17 Caller I ain't a Jew, baby.

1:12:19 Adam Go dye your hair blonde and go on JDate.

1:12:20 Caller I've been dying right here for 15 years.

1:12:23 Drew Oh boy.

1:12:23 Adam She's talking. Oh my God. What a train wreck. She needs stimulating?

1:12:29 Drew She's talking about physics.

1:12:31 Adam How about you start with a guy who doesn't make on the coffee table when he gets drunk and then we'll work our way up to Ben Stein.

1:12:40 Drew Yeah.

1:12:40 Adam Yeah. Okay.

1:12:41 Drew We'll get there.

1:12:41 Adam We'll eventually get to Ben Stein. Start with a guy who doesn't beat the crap out of you and refer to you as his old lady. When he's in front of his friends.

1:12:49 Drew Yeah.

1:12:50 Adam And then we'll work our way up to that. Yeah.

1:12:52 Drew Yeah.

1:12:53 Adam Oh, train wreck. Look, J-Date, lots of Jewish guys. I'm telling you, go blonde with the hair. Jewish guys love blonde hair. It's like a trout seeing something shiny.

1:13:06 Drew Oh, really? It's like a tractor beam.

1:13:07 Adam They can't not bite. They can't not strike on it. They love blonde hair.

1:13:12 Drew Oh, look at poor Elizabeth.

1:13:14 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:13:15 Adam Oh, is your man Jewish?

1:13:17 Elisabeth Harnois No.

1:13:17 Adam Oh, he'd be he'd be over the moon if he was. As it is, he's happy, but he'd be.

1:13:23 Elisabeth Harnois He's doing all right.

1:13:24 Adam Yeah, he's doing fine. But he'd be. Yeah. Get yourself a Jew. You really want to be appreciated. Good Jewish guy. Take a quick break. Be right back after this.

1:13:35 Caller Hello, this is your radio. Love Line will be ready. She's awesome.

1:13:56 Adam Yeah, buddy, it's Loveline. That's what I'm talking about. Gotta get it on.

1:14:01 Drew Got to.

1:14:02 Adam Woo, no choice but to get on this close to dropping Trow.

1:14:05 Drew Nancy, I almost made you do that.

1:14:06 Adam I'll drop Trow. I will drop Trow.

1:14:10 Drew You will.

1:14:10 Adam I'll drop Trow, too.

1:14:12 Drew He will, Elisabeth. I'll tell him. I don't have the energy for that, Adam.

1:14:15 Adam I'll drop Trow, I'll drop Trow.

1:14:16 Drew He will, I swear to God. Watch out, he'll do it.

1:14:19 Adam He's wild, he's wild. Tell Elisabeth, I'm wild.

1:14:21 Drew Elisabeth, Ian will drop Trow.

1:14:23 Adam Where's the guy? Where won't I drop Trow?

1:14:26 Drew No, anywhere, anywhere, everywhere. There's nowhere you won't.

1:14:29 Adam I will drop Trow.

1:14:31 Drew Right here in the studio, he's wild. He's a radio guy.

1:14:33 Adam If I was riding, I'll drop Trow. If I was riding, hold on a second, if I was driving Shotgun in the Pope Mobile, I would be dropping Trow.

1:14:41 Drew In the Pope Mobile. He is wild.

1:14:42 Adam In the Pope Mobile.

1:14:43 Drew Yep, and you'd moon the whole-

1:14:44 Adam Press my ass up against that, that sneeze guard he travels in, whatever that bulletproof sneeze guard, yes, yes. I was just thinking, what a lovely, to me, the Pope and then traveling in the three inch Lexan bulletproof Pope Mobile really says everything you need to know about the time we're living in, religion and everything else. Here's the Pope, everybody. Now, this will, it'll, it'll stop anything. Well, 38 caliber and above. Missile. It'll stop. Yeah, it's not going to, not going to stop a, you know, sidewinder missile, but small arms fire and sniper fire. It'll stop. Just as anyone else. Here's why you can't take mushrooms, Drew.

1:15:28 Drew Yeah, yeah.

1:15:29 Adam You take mushrooms, you see the 90 year old guy bent over with the beanie being dragged around in the bulletproof Mercedes with the bubble top on it. And you just start fraking.

1:15:40 Drew Yeah.

1:15:40 Adam What is going on?

1:15:41 Drew Yes.

1:15:42 Adam What's going on?

1:15:42 Drew Because you think about it objectively. You think from a distance.

1:15:45 Adam You're from a different planet.

1:15:46 Drew Yeah. You're like, yeah, like an anthropologist from Mars.

1:15:48 Adam Yeah. Here's the beauty of drugs in mushrooms for that matter, especially. I'll tell you. Well, we'll get high in the parking lot after the show. I'll show you my world.

1:15:58 Drew I wonder if as Asperger's kids, like, you know, some of the people we know on radio have been described as feeling like they're anthropologists from Mars. I wonder if it feels like you're on mushrooms a lot of the time.

1:16:08 Adam Well, here's. Yeah.

1:16:10 Elisabeth Harnois Is that what it is? It's like a removal from what you're seeing and sort of mushrooms.

1:16:13 Caller Yeah.

1:16:15 Caller Yeah.

1:16:15 Drew That's what the experience is.

1:16:17 Caller You know what it is?

1:16:17 Drew It's that everything is extremely novel, novelty that the amygdala are firing off.

1:16:23 Elisabeth Harnois Right.

1:16:23 Drew And that's a novelty experience.

1:16:25 Adam Yeah.

1:16:26 Elisabeth Harnois It's also hallucinogenic. So you're clearly.

1:16:29 Drew You're also distorting reality and things. But this novelty experience is the thing that most hallucinogenic, that what's enjoyable in hallucinogenics. Oh my God. My hand. I've never noticed that before.

1:16:39 Elisabeth Harnois Almost for the first time.

1:16:40 Drew Novel.

1:16:41 Adam Yeah. Because you have to go through life with things sort of shut down. Otherwise.

1:16:47 Drew Screening out.

1:16:48 Adam Yeah. Otherwise there'll be the bells going off in your head every step of the way. Everything you see, everything you do, everything will become seem bizarre and ritualistic. And why do we do this? And why do women paint their nails red? What is that? Red bloody claws? Like, how does that work? Every I mean, everything cosmetic seems bizarre.

1:17:10 Drew Paint your face and then paint your fear. You know. Yeah.

1:17:13 Adam And then yeah. And then anything piercing seems seems weird. And then all the crazy, bizarre laws that we have about to pick a topic like gambling. Yeah. The lot we see lottery commercial.

1:17:25 Drew Did you win the lottery, by the way?

1:17:26 Adam I don't know. But you can't bet on football. Everything just seems bizarre.

1:17:31 Elisabeth Harnois But that doesn't seem that different than other drug experiences. I mean, I'm trying to figure out like what makes.

1:17:36 Drew No, most drugs do activate that same system.

1:17:39 Adam No, not no, no, no. Here I hate to disagree. But here's the thing.

1:17:43 Elisabeth Harnois I mean, obviously not from only the point of references that I have.

1:17:46 Adam But well, what I mean is when you get everything except mushrooms.

1:17:49 Elisabeth Harnois Right.

1:17:50 Caller That's not what I'm saying.

1:17:51 Adam She's chasing the dragon.

1:17:53 Elisabeth Harnois Right.

1:17:53 Drew Yeah, of course.

1:17:54 Adam She shot up in the bathroom.

1:17:55 Caller I saw the red.

1:17:57 Caller Frequent trips to the bathroom.

1:17:59 Adam Here's the thing.

1:17:59 Drew I'll talk to her later.

1:18:02 Adam When you get high on coke, you don't really sit around and think about why humans behave the way they behave. You just have plans about how you're going to get your piece of the pot.

1:18:11 Elisabeth Harnois It's less analytical. But marijuana is-

1:18:13 Drew Marijuana is an amygdala, yeah. The pot and the lucid does all activate the amygdala.

1:18:18 Adam Marijuana makes you enjoy the novel stuff, but it doesn't make you break it down and take it apart. You get high on mushrooms, you dissect. What the hell are we doing? How does this work this way?

1:18:30 Drew LSD sounds the same thing.

1:18:32 Elisabeth Harnois It sounds exhausting.

1:18:33 Adam It is. It is. Because what happens is it's like you start thinking about burial rituals. We take the guy and we put him in his suit, we put makeup on him, and we drain the fluids out of him and pump formaldehyde into him, and then we all get a good look at him while he's propped up in the casket.

1:18:49 Caller Then we just bury him.

1:18:50 Adam I think I would panic.

1:18:52 Drew There's a lot of panic.

1:18:53 Elisabeth Harnois I would panic.

1:18:53 Drew People do get panic a lot of the time.

1:18:55 Adam You do get, you do get, you do have to do some thinking.

1:18:58 Elisabeth Harnois Yeah, yeah, not because of the thinking part, you know, like just the, that sort of...

1:19:04 Adam It becomes overwhelming. Yeah. And, and then all the, you know, suicide bombers, you know, it's in one ear and out the other. A guy strapped a bunch of C4 explosive to his vest. He walked into a crowded marketplace in Tel Aviv. It's like, you know, you just, oh, you hear it every day. You're high on mushrooms. It's like, wow, the guy made himself into a bomb.

1:19:24 Elisabeth Harnois You guys should do the show on Mushrooms 1.

1:19:26 Drew I'm high now.

1:19:28 Caller You're doing really well.

1:19:29 Drew Every night.

1:19:30 Adam Thank you.

1:19:30 Drew But it's also because then you start thinking, well, I wonder what that would look like. And then you start picturing it and then you go insane.

1:19:35 Elisabeth Harnois And that's when it's bad.

1:19:36 Adam Yeah, yeah, it's weird, but everything's novel and everything's strange and everything's new.

1:19:40 Elisabeth Harnois So what's the best, not that I want advice here, but what's the best environment or situation in which to-

1:19:45 Adam Do mushrooms?

1:19:46 Drew Very calm.

1:19:47 Elisabeth Harnois Just like in a personal space, you know, I'm assuming not a new space.

1:19:50 Drew Safe, calm, quiet environment.

1:19:52 Adam Yeah, you come by, I'll draw the curtains and put the doors. I got a little doors. This is the-

1:19:59 Drew I wonder if sex would be weird. I think about if sex would be like-

1:20:01 Adam Well, we're going to find out.

1:20:02 Drew But I mean, think about-

1:20:04 Adam What is this?

1:20:05 Elisabeth Harnois Oh my God, don't kill me.

1:20:07 Adam It's true. It's too groovy. You just want to hug. You don't really-

1:20:11 Elisabeth Harnois Does it ruin sex drive?

1:20:14 Adam It doesn't. I didn't have anyone to hump the last time I was high in mushrooms. It makes you groovy, horny, and a flower power. Let's all get naked and roll around, but not an actual, I'm going to slap some ass cheeks.

1:20:28 Drew Not a deal closing way.

1:20:29 Adam No, not in a- You get coked up, you got a little momentum. Here's the whole thing. You get high on coke, you have all the momentum in the world, but the junk doesn't really work that well.

1:20:41 Drew That's right.

1:20:41 Adam You get high on mushrooms, the junk will work fine, but you don't really need it. You want to hug. It's like soft core porn.

1:20:49 Drew I don't see you in that way, but-

1:20:51 Adam Yeah.

1:20:52 Drew Girlie porn.

1:20:52 Adam Yeah, it's like a girlie. It's like there's a Manuel movies from the 70s. That's what it's like.

1:20:56 Drew Elizabeth likes the regular porn though.

1:20:57 Adam Oh, you do? Fantastic.

1:20:59 Drew You can share that. Adam has a bunker of porn.

1:21:02 Adam Bunker.

1:21:03 Caller Awesome.

1:21:04 Adam I got a bunker. Let me show you my world and my bunker.

1:21:07 Drew How are you going to get her in? It only scans your palm and your face.

1:21:12 Adam Yeah. I have a past system I can't really discuss over the air. To get in the bunker. Yeah. I use mirrors to deflect the laser beams.

1:21:21 Drew Oh, nice.

1:21:22 Adam Yeah.

1:21:23 Drew All right.

1:21:23 Adam You ready?

1:21:24 Caller Yeah.

1:21:25 Adam Mushrooms. Freak out. Freak out. Jonathan?

1:21:31 Caller Yeah.

1:21:32 Adam Seventeen?

1:21:33 Caller Yeah.

1:21:34 Adam What's up?

1:21:35 Caller Yeah.

1:21:35 Adam What are you talking about before mushrooms?

1:21:37 Drew I have no idea.

1:21:38 Adam Freak out.

1:21:39 Drew I blame Elisabeth. She keeps sending us off the ground.

1:21:40 Elisabeth Harnois I was really curious.

1:21:41 Adam Out.

1:21:42 Elisabeth Harnois I'm sorry.

1:21:43 Adam Go ahead, Jonathan. You're seventeen.

1:21:45 Caller Yeah. I've been getting blue balls lately. And I was wondering if there's any cure.

1:21:49 Drew What in what context does this happen? And what do you talk? What are you describing?

1:21:54 Caller Like, like my girlfriend, we've been together for like a week or so. And like every like she were not like too far. So she keeps I keep doing stuff to her. Like I'm not doing anything to me. So I like it really turned on. I never get off. So like I come home like after and like I get blue balls like really bad.

1:22:14 Drew What do you experience?

1:22:16 Caller Just like pain. Like I have to lay down. Like I just can't sit down or stand up.

1:22:21 Adam How come? Why don't you just beat off and go to bed?

1:22:24 Caller Well, does that fix it?

1:22:26 Drew Yes, that does. Yeah, that's bogus.

1:22:29 Adam What are you, an idiot? You sit, you dry hump your girlfriend for three hours and go down. You just go home. I have this erect penis. My balls are aching. I better go to bed. You're 17.

1:22:40 Elisabeth Harnois I thought that was sort of an instinctual thing. You knew to just do that.

1:22:43 Drew Yes, they do.

1:22:43 Caller Of course.

1:22:44 Adam I was five. You beat off in the car on the way home. Listen, save your bogus questions for the next idiot who comes along.

1:22:53 Drew All right.

1:22:54 Caller Keep moving.

1:22:55 Adam That's a bogus question. Here's the thing. Whenever there's a I have no question question, it's bogus. What do I do? What do I do? You stare at your erection for nine hours, you idiot.

1:23:08 Elisabeth Harnois But what if someone really is just clueless?

1:23:11 Drew We can tell. And by the way, he answered it in his derision of the call.

1:23:17 Adam He hung up. Yes. And guys that are that stupid don't get girlfriends.

1:23:21 Elisabeth Harnois You know? True.

1:23:23 Drew Or they get girlfriends like Nancy.

1:23:25 Adam That's right.

1:23:25 Drew In which case they're having sex.

1:23:26 Adam That's right. Jenna?

1:23:28 Caller Yeah.

1:23:29 Adam That's true. Super stupid guys either get no girlfriends or get ones they get to bang the bejesus out of. True. Jenna?

1:23:36 Caller Yeah.

1:23:36 Drew Thanks for confirming that, Jenna.

1:23:39 Adam Yeah. Thank you. What's up?

1:23:41 Caller Well, I am 16 and I like I am attracted to men who are 19 to 21. And they drink.

1:23:52 Drew Like dad?

1:23:53 Caller Yeah. I lost my dad when I was nine.

1:23:55 Drew To alcoholism?

1:23:57 Caller Yeah. He was drunk. He was driving drunk.

1:24:01 Drew So you got to reach back and get that dad back and make it right.

1:24:05 Caller Yeah.

1:24:05 Drew So my question doesn't work like that. You end up with the same abandoning, intoxicated, seriously ill with alcoholism.

1:24:13 Adam How was dad before that? Just was he drunken dad?

1:24:18 Caller I only, I didn't really get to see him a lot because my parents divorced and so I would go up and I would see him every weekend.

1:24:25 Drew How old were you when they divorced?

1:24:27 Caller One.

1:24:28 Caller One.

1:24:30 Caller So I pretty much grew up with my mom.

1:24:32 Caller Okay.

1:24:33 Drew All right. So if you want to get, you want to stop this pattern?

1:24:36 Caller Yeah, I do.

1:24:38 Drew There's a free way of doing it and that's you go to an Al-Anon meeting or an ACA meeting and you get a sponsor and you work 12 steps. How about that? That will change how you relate to people with alcoholism and you won't be so attracted to it anymore. You'll be attracted to a broader range of people and not just trying to fix what happened with dad. Okay. You'll also get therapy.

1:24:59 Adam Go do that. All right. Hey, speaking of drugs and booze, you know, Kelly Hu was in here last night. Yeah. X-Men and all that nice sprinkling of nerds outside waiting to get her John Hancock on their way out. Remember, she gave me something from her drug store.

1:25:18 Drew Yes. The Klonopin.

1:25:19 Adam Was that Klonopin?

1:25:19 Drew Yeah.

1:25:20 Adam Yeah.

1:25:21 Drew Nothing.

1:25:21 Adam Yeah. I was angry at her last night about 12.45. I took it. I was like, I don't know.

1:25:27 Drew What is that? It's a benzodiazepine valium-like drug. Long acting.

1:25:32 Adam Chicken ass, I call it.

1:25:33 Drew Low dose. Low dose. You mix it with your medicine, that worked.

1:25:36 Adam I gave it a little shot of booze. Like, there's nothing going on here. I think it was like a Pez you took from her purse. I was angry at you, Drew. You're like, you're me? Yeah. It's a very angry message on your phone machine. I'm surprised you haven't checked it. Yeah. I was like, come on, let's go with these drugs. Kick them up. You know what I'm saying? Make them work or not. What's the low dose stuff, Drew? What's that good for?

1:25:59 Drew It's for anxiety disorder.

1:26:00 Adam All right. But shouldn't there just be a pink one for the ladies and a blue one for the dudes?

1:26:06 Drew And what about for the heavyweights?

1:26:08 Adam Black? That's the black one.

1:26:09 Drew Yeah.

1:26:10 Adam Yeah.

1:26:11 Drew That's you.

1:26:12 Adam No, that's what I'm saying. I mean, why am I taking the same drugs? 109 pound Asian broad is staking.

1:26:17 Drew You stole them out of her pills.

1:26:19 Adam Oh yeah. Okay. All right.

1:26:21 Drew Nobody prescribed them to you. You stole them from her.

1:26:23 Adam Okay. All right.

1:26:24 Drew I would not have prescribed that to you. No, no, listen. Don't worry about it.

1:26:26 Adam That's a good answer. That's a fair answer. Okay. So I took it from her.

1:26:31 Drew Yeah, but still.

1:26:32 Adam That's why I'm taking her medicine. Okay.

1:26:34 Drew I know. I'm saying I would never have let you down by prescribing such a weak ass medicine.

1:26:37 Adam Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. All right. We're here with Elisabeth Harnois. She is from a little something called Point Pleasant. Tuesday Nights. I should say Thursday Nights, everybody.

1:26:49 Drew Everybody got to watch this week. We need to keep this show going.

1:26:51 Adam This Thursday, 9 o'clock.

1:26:54 Elisabeth Harnois It's on after the OC.

1:26:55 Adam Yeah. Watch the OC and don't change it.

1:26:56 Caller It's getting really, really good.

1:26:58 Elisabeth Harnois And not just because I'm, you know, because I'm, it's not a-

1:27:00 Drew It's got great actors and actress in it, which is one thing that jumps out about that show.

1:27:05 Elisabeth Harnois Well cast, yeah.

1:27:05 Adam Drew hates everything.

1:27:08 Drew Yes. Everything.

1:27:09 Adam Drew loves this show.

1:27:12 Elisabeth Harnois Cool.

1:27:12 Adam Absolutely. All right. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. Hey, everybody, Loveline, and that's Dr. Drew, Elisabeth Harnois, here tonight. She is, that's French for Don't Cancel Us. That's right. Thursday Nights, Nine O'Clock, Fox, Point Pleasant. Drew has deemed the show the breakout smash of the year.

1:27:48 Drew Genius performances, genius, I tell you.

1:27:50 Adam And is on Drew's, Elizabeth on Drew's top 10 up and commerce list. Yeah.

1:27:56 Drew Speaking of genius, again, I'm going to put out another plea for my own program. I need women who've had babies and as a result of having had babies have problems with their sex life. And or people, couples who are afraid of having sex during pregnancy. They freak out about that and worry and have all kinds of weird preoccupations about it.

1:28:13 Adam Andrew? Andrew?

1:28:17 Drew Yeah. There he is.

1:28:18 Caller 21? That I am.

1:28:20 Adam You want laser, oh no.

1:28:22 Drew I know, but he sounded funny.

1:28:24 Adam All right, wants laser hair removal on his nut sack?

1:28:28 Caller Yes.

1:28:29 Caller I was curious. My girlfriend was talking with me last night and she mentioned they can get a bikini wax or whatever and they can get the laser hair removal.

1:28:40 Caller I'm curious whether guys can do that on their nut.

1:28:43 Adam That was featured in Bond movie from the late 60s.

1:28:47 Drew No, I don't think that they would probably do that on the testicles. I don't think that would hurt. Yeah. The women, if you wanted it on your pubic area, they might do it. I don't know what the heck would make you do that, but whatever.

1:28:59 Adam Scrotum is sacred ground and the idea of getting a tattoo on it or taking a laser to it or doing any kind of piercings.

1:29:09 Drew It doesn't seem like a good idea.

1:29:11 Adam No. Now, it seems like it's just made to do something with because it seems like something extra. Your body is presented like a scratch pad or something.

1:29:22 Caller Extra, extra, extra.

1:29:23 Drew Yeah.

1:29:24 Adam Something you could whittle on a little bit.

1:29:26 Drew Extra scam, sure.

1:29:26 Adam But I wouldn't go down that route.

1:29:29 Drew No.

1:29:29 Adam Focus on the ear lobes.

1:29:30 Drew Extra porous, that the testicle.

1:29:33 Adam Yeah. Here's the thing too. I mean, look, you work, get a little gasoline on your hands and then itch your junk. You'll know it. It goes through. It's a sieve.

1:29:43 Drew You can taste it.

1:29:44 Adam It's like a spaghetti colander, my nut sack. Yeah. I'll drain pasta right through it. Water pass right through it like a sieve, but the pasta stays behind.

1:29:54 Drew Why did we use your nuts as the coffee filter? We all had coffee problem.

1:29:57 Adam I did. I put my nuts in there.

1:29:59 Drew Oh, that was what you.

1:30:00 Elisabeth Harnois Oh, thanks. Thank you.

1:30:01 Drew Yeah, I appreciate that.

1:30:02 Elisabeth Harnois Just had a cup.

1:30:03 Adam Yeah. Chalk full of nuts.

1:30:05 Drew Adam Corolla, Mr. Elastics Grotto.

1:30:07 Elisabeth Harnois It's my favorite kind.

1:30:08 Adam When I said chalk full of nuts, I did not mean the brand. It was Hills Brothers. It was chock full of the Ace Man's nutsack.

1:30:14 Caller Yeah.

1:30:15 Adam I assume that's what the brand means. All right, Drew, who's been on hold the longest? Let's talk to Diego.

1:30:21 Drew Susan's been on hold the longest.

1:30:23 Adam Tough beans. Diego? Yeah.

1:30:25 Caller How are you doing, guys?

1:30:26 Adam 26. Your wife did meth for the first four months of her pregnancy.

1:30:32 Caller Oh, my God. That's correct. Well, basically, my wife and I have been together for 10 years, but we've only been married since August of last year. So we've been it took us a long time, but we wanted her to finish school. All right.

1:30:46 Adam Who cares? How much meth did she do? Was it a daily thing?

1:30:51 Caller It was a daily thing. She was at one point, she said she was doing it twice a day. At then a certain point, she started trying to cut back, and she was doing it three times a week. All right.

1:31:03 Drew So she's an amphetamine addict. We got to A that problem.

1:31:05 Adam What's it do to the kid?

1:31:07 Drew It may be nothing, but it can certainly, it may be.

1:31:11 Adam Is a kid been born?

1:31:13 Caller No. No. The expected due date is the 31st of this month. So it's coming up really soon.

1:31:19 Drew You need to talk to the obstetrician and whoever pediatrician she sees. This is important stuff. There can be neuro and neurological problems and cognitive deficits in these kids. This is the drug I actually worry about during pregnancy.

1:31:32 Adam Oh, it is?

1:31:32 Drew Yeah.

1:31:33 Adam More than booze?

1:31:35 Drew Yeah.

1:31:35 Adam All right. See?

1:31:36 Drew Yeah.

1:31:37 Adam Here's my point.

1:31:37 Drew More than opiates.

1:31:38 Elisabeth Harnois What's chemically going on when?

1:31:40 Drew We don't know. Well, I don't know.

1:31:42 Adam He wasn't going to be president anyway with a meth head for a mom.

1:31:45 Drew Yeah. It's presumably the same mechanism as with people that are walking around on the earth, which is something called excitotoxicity, where the vesicles that are releasing chemicals between neurons, the function of that gets disrupted and the neurochemicals get loose inside the cell, turn into free radicals and destroy the cells.

1:32:04 Caller Can't get high in mushrooms unless we do that to the fetus.

1:32:07 Drew It could destroy brain tissue.

1:32:08 Adam Yeah. All right. Here's the thing. Kids, first off, what percentage of people come out actually do anything anyway? You got to look at it that way. We need bus drivers. We need garbage.

1:32:17 Drew We need more loveline callers.

1:32:18 Adam We need more callers. That's number one. Number two, mom's a meth head. Dad's a guy who thought it was a good idea to marry her. Right. Where's the kid going?

1:32:26 Caller Yeah. That's a problem.

1:32:28 Adam Not going to Wesleyan.

1:32:30 Drew No.

1:32:30 Adam Say that right now or I am hers. So here's the thing. Take care of the kid. Do what you can and look into her because anyone is doing a ton of speed when they're pregnant and knows they're pregnant has a serious problem.

1:32:40 Drew Just because she was able to control it during the pregnancy, do not think that she is over her addiction.

1:32:45 Elisabeth Harnois Congratulations on the coming of a new baby.

1:32:47 Adam Mazel Tov, Mazel Tov. Susan? Yeah. You're 18 and you've been on hold for 100 years. We're going to put you on hold and we'll take you first up tomorrow night, all right? Do not hang up. I'm sorry. I blame Drew. All right.

1:33:02 Caller If I call, will I be able to get through?

1:33:04 Adam Just no. We're going to call you, but just don't hang up. All right.

1:33:07 Drew Brian, make sure.

1:33:08 Adam Brian, get Susan first on deck for tomorrow night. So we'll take ourselves a quick break. Be right back after this.

1:33:16 Caller Alright, guys, here's the deal.

1:33:18 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

1:33:21 Caller One call's all you need to make.

1:33:23 Caller Call the Dateline.

1:33:24 Adam 877-889-DATE.

1:33:24 Caller Call the Dateline.

1:33:47 Adam Hey, everybody. That's the show, Elisabeth. God bless you for coming in. Everybody, everybody watch Point Pleasant. I'm telling you, this is a good show. You want to know what Drew's watching? You want to know? You'll watch just Point Pleasant.

1:34:01 Drew I'll be watching it with you.

1:34:03 Adam Fox, and it will be. It'll be a communal experience. You get close enough to the set, you can see Drew's wife cracking the whip on him. That's right, you should always poise with that. You want a theme to Germany or Florida, that's 10 minutes away, but you make a whip and joke. Wow. Pow. All right. Thursday nights, nine o'clock.

1:34:24 Caller You're going to take a lot of people on the air.

1:34:26 Adam God bless you, Elizabeth.

1:34:27 Elisabeth Harnois Thank you.

1:34:27 Adam All right.

1:34:28 Caller What the hell was that?

1:34:30 Adam I think that was an Anderson drop. Was that a drop?

1:34:33 Drew Was that live Anderson?

1:34:34 Adam Or is that you?

1:34:35 Caller No, I was doing a drop of myself.

1:34:37 Adam Awesome. Live. Talk about art imitating life. Yes. Anderson putting a drop in of Anderson. All right. So until next time, I'm Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. Yeah, the sun's mainly just, it's all gases.

1:34:53 Caller It's Burning Gas, and she's like, The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or the station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Tuesday, March 15, 2005