Episode 1000627408780

0:54 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.

1:00 Voiceover Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:02 Adam Hey everybody, it's the best of Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla, that's Dr. Drew. Hopefully, neither one of us are here because it's the best of. And we're all winners when we do the best of. We get to stay home. For me, I get to stare at the TiVo and get drunk. For Drew, he gets to follow his kids around and live his life vicariously through the eyes of three young, beautiful triplets. So, and you guys get the best of Loveline. So, without any further ado, here it is. The best of Loveline.

1:41 Oh, yeah.

1:43 Adam Yeah. Hey, Drew. You know what I'm about this close to doing, buddy?

1:52 Drew Ken, don't tempt this guy. He will do it. I swear to God he'll do it.

1:58 Don't make me drop trap.

1:59 Drew I'll drop trap.

2:00 I'll drop trap. I'll drop trap.

2:02 Adam I could tell you, but I have to kill you. 1108, eight minutes after 11. That's another one they do. I forget about two. You know, we do the math. You know, we do the math. We do the, you know, we do the subtraction. 736 is 24 away from the top of the hour.

2:19 Drew So it's just the restating. 1108, that's eight minutes after the hour.

2:23 Adam That's the other good radio one. Here's the thing about radio. Anything not to formulate a thought.

2:29 Drew And to repeat and then take time.

2:31 Adam Yeah, cause here's what radio is basically. Radio is like, look, we have marginally talented people that got to kill four hours. What the hell are they going to do? Well, here's something you can do. Repeat yourself. Yeah, when you say 807, say seven minutes after eight after that, and then you say 53 minutes away from the top of the hour. And then you keep back selling and you can talk about news and weather and weather news, and you never run out of anything to talk about. Yeah, it's great. That's great. I went over to, there used to be a guy, he used to work in a city called the Nasty Man. Oh yeah. He was this bald guy who, God did he blow. And KLSX, who does the talk out here, that, yeah, I don't know how they managed to take float. They've done a few, I guess, stern, they've done a few good things, but boy, boy, they made some horrible calls. Just like super, super retard calls. They had the Nasty Man on for a while. And I went in the studio once and he had stuff just posted on his wall that he could look up at. And he'd go, just say like, your window to the world. And he'd just be looking around and go, it's Nasty Man, it's 708, it's eight minutes after seven, your window to the world, the Nasty Man. You know, it's just five or six catchphrases in case you ever ran out of something to say, you just look up and you just see it.

3:58 Drew Oh boy.

3:58 Adam Yeah, it's good times.

3:59 Drew That is good times.

4:00 Adam Yeah, I'm sure he's working somewhere, maybe doing a little, you know, doing weddings, things like that, a little mobile DJ work. All right, you know the thing about KLSX, by the way? Wanted, they wanted to do a show with me and Jimmy, or I want to do a show. No, not gonna do it. Yeah, that's genius. Yeah, got the nasty man, Kimmel and Corolla, no.

4:26 Drew None of the talent there.

4:27 Adam Yeah, I'll tell you, those radio programmers, genius. Boy, there's some sharp guys. Very, very sharp fellas, super smart. You think TV guys are stupid? Think how stupid radio guys must be. You know what I'm saying, Drew?

4:41 Drew They're stupid enough to be in this business, which is a pretty good business.

4:46 Adam Yeah, you know why? Because there's no competition. It's your only competition from other idiots. So all you gotta be is the top idiot. Yeah, on this station, on K-Rock, they wouldn't put me and Kimmel on together. I remember them telling me, or the program director at this station, or the general manager told me Kimmel wasn't on air material. There's a behind the scenes man. Good writer, you know, good producer. Not a personality. And who knows, he may still be right. We don't know. You know what I'm saying?

5:23 Drew Don't judge, cannot judge.

5:25 Adam Cannot judge. Shannon?

5:27 Best Of Yeah, hi.

5:28 Adam What's happening, baby doll?

5:30 Best Of Well, I actually heard your comment about the gossip, and I do agree that it is ridiculous, but it actually does serve as a function. And pre-adolescence, like, well, I go to UCSD, and I'm a developmental psychology major, and I just went through all this adolescent stuff. So I just learned that actually teenagers will use gossip to kind of feel each other out, to check their beliefs with each other. So actually it's kind of a developmental stage as you get older. So that 17-year-old that's all about the gossip, it's actually like part of her, like that's kind of-

6:04 Adam It's not pre-adolescence.

6:06 Drew Yeah, pre-adolescence is 1911, 12. No, no, Shannon, what we actually said was that it is like children to be that caught up in gossip. And then, which is the case, and that children use that sometimes as a way of sort of gaining esteem amongst their peers too. Yeah, exactly. And what you guys didn't hear is Adam and I continued our conversation off the air, and we started talking about how women use gossip as a way of getting a group together and then shunning one. Exactly. Because women continue to shun just the way, believe it or not, other primates do. And men have essentially no shunning instincts. They just don't do that. I would say because the brain's wired differently.

6:50 Adam Yeah.

6:50 Drew It's just the way it is.

6:52 Adam Shannon, you're a developmental psychology major?

6:56 Best Of Yeah.

6:57 Adam For kids, for children?

6:59 Drew Humans, just the whole life spectrum.

7:02 Best Of Yeah, exactly. But my focus is going to be adolescent, so.

7:06 Adam All right, come on, don't get into that. That's a cop out.

7:09 Drew Why?

7:10 Best Of Why?

7:11 Adam Because, let me explain. Everything for kids is a cop out.

7:14 Drew What?

7:15 Adam Entertainment for kids, cop out.

7:17 Drew Wait, well, what do we talk about all the time? That's the time you can make a difference is when people are kids.

7:22 Adam The books, the kids, they write the children's books.

7:24 Drew Yeah, but this is trying to therapeutically help kids so they don't get screwed up.

7:28 Adam Let me explain how it works. Here's some clay, Junior, get busy.

7:30 Drew No, no, no, no, no.

7:30 Adam I'm gonna go blow a butt out by the vending machine.

7:33 Drew Look at all the screwed up older adolescents we get because nobody intervened when they were young.

7:37 Adam Listen, here's a child psychologist, where, the psychologist. Here, here, draw something. Here you go. Here's some construction paper and a marxolot. Go to town, Junior. Then a kid draws a picture of somebody stabbing somebody else. Who's that? That's Daddy. What's he doing? Stabbing Mommy. Okay, let me talk to Mommy, Daddy. He's got some anger. He feels as if the father's being aggressive. Yeah, here's some clay. It's really, it's a cop out. I mean, you're doing the kids some good or maybe you are, maybe you're not, but whenever you work with kids, whether it's children's books, children's entertainment, children's psychology, it's a cop out. It is. It means, it means, see, if you worked with adults, they tell you it was no good. The kids, kids, they can't do it. They're just working with clay the whole time. They draw a picture.

8:25 Drew Well, the idea is just to form attachments with them and help them with the attachment formation.

8:29 Adam Here's some dolls, here's some clay. Sit on that very small novelty chair. I'm gonna sit on the big person chair over here and I'll watch you. And then once in a while, get called in the court and screw up something.

8:41 Drew It's interesting that you would have no appreciation for this. All the child psychologist is really supposed to do fundamentally is attune to the child. Just attune to them as they do whatever task it is that they need to do. They don't, that's the child attune to the puppy then.

8:55 Adam You don't need 14 years of schooling to sit there and to hand the kids some clay. That's all I'm saying. Now listen, it's a cop-out gig. It's just like writing children's books, cop-out. That's all. I'm just saying. Shannon? But listen, it's smart. It's a good move. It's easy.

9:14 Drew Well, she's talking about adolescents too, by the way, not children.

9:16 Adam Well, that's where it gets a little tougher. You're dealing with the 11 year old that was molested and is trying to F his step sister. That's different.

9:24 Best Of Okay, now what happened this early on when you detected something and realized that this 11 year old was being molested, you know, most of their life, isn't, wouldn't you say that child psychologist is absolutely important for finding that kind of stuff? Yeah. That they aren't effective for the rest of their life?

9:38 Adam I mean, if he can spell molested out of clay, I guess we can actually make an M out of the clay. Just call me back when you start getting into the clay and construction paper part of it.

9:51 Drew I was a part of a consensus conference on Atlanta that Rosalind Carter put on, of all things. And the consensus was that the earlier the intervention, the better the outcome. And that the overall consensus was that most interventions to be effective, really in terms of lifelong change, must be entertained by age eight.

10:10 Adam Really?

10:10 Drew Yeah.

10:11 Adam Yeah, good times. Yeah. They're never gonna happen. Wait, someone's got a problem with my-

10:17 Drew Yeah, go ahead.

10:18 Adam The gas part.

10:19 Drew No, no, take the-

10:19 Adam Who else over here?

10:20 Drew No, no, take the gas thing.

10:21 All right.

10:24 Paul? Yeah.

10:26 Adam You're 26?

10:27 Caller Yes, I am.

10:28 Adam All right, so, yes.

10:30 Caller The problem I have with the gas price idea is that-

10:34 It's a ridiculous show.

10:38 Adam Hold on a second.

10:39 Drew It's like it could become like the Phil Henry show. You say bizarre, off-the-wall things and people call up and react to it.

10:45 Adam Hold on, he's a working father. So let me get this straight. He's got a kid and a job?

10:51 Drew And five dollars will be a lot for him.

10:53 Adam Holy Christ, we got to stop the presses. Yes, go ahead, Paul.

10:57 Caller I got two kids.

10:58 Adam Two kids.

10:59 Caller And they live in Orange County. I'm four hours away. And I have one of those types of vehicles you're talking about.

11:05 Adam Yes.

11:06 Caller Yeah, and it's hard for me to get there at times to get my kids.

11:11 Adam Why do you live four hours away from your kids?

11:14 Caller Because we, the mother and I met in college.

11:19 Adam Exactly. Okay.

11:21 Drew No, that does not explain the four hours away.

11:23 Adam I didn't know you guys met collegiately. That's, yeah.

11:26 Drew And it requires four hours distance in order to Well, four hour, minimum.

11:29 Adam Minimum if you meet in college. The Geneva Convention on, yes. It goes high 17 hours away, yeah.

11:36 Caller Yeah, yeah, yeah.

11:38 Adam You met in college. Yeah.

11:40 Caller Yeah, you live four hours apart. Because I live down here in Visalia, and she's in Orange County.

11:48 Drew And our question was, why did you choose to live?

11:52 Adam Why do you live four hours from your kids? Well, we met in college. All right, that's number one. Then, well, that didn't answer our question. Well, we're four miles apart. Four hours apart. I live, you know, four hours apart because I live out here in Visalia and she's four hours away. Hold on, Drew, let me get this down.

12:13 Drew You live four hours apart because you live four hours apart.

12:17 Adam All right, well, Paul, you've made a very compelling argument against my $5 gallon gas thing. And I'm gonna reconsider it now. I didn't know you were four hours away. Latte, Drew, it takes a big man to admit when he's wrong. And this Paul must've anchored this speech and debate team at that college he met his wife at. Brown. Because obviously Ivy League. Yeah, because this man's bulletproof. This is, he is made of Kevlar, this cat.

12:51 Drew I heard Cartman make a better argument today. On a debate.

12:55 Adam Couldn't just call me a fag 300 times and hang up. It would have been more compelling. All right, so he disagrees. Here's all I was saying. Oh, forget it. I was saying, let's charge five bucks a gallon for gas. And the extra $2.60 goes right into subsidizing all mass transit, buses, everything, free passes, everything.

13:17 Drew Including giving people free passes.

13:18 Adam Right, but now that Paul chose to live four hours away from his children.

13:22 Drew We have to stop.

13:23 Adam We gotta stop that. We'll put that. I got some, as a matter of fact, Drew.

13:28 Drew And by the way-

13:29 Adam I gotta stop the paperwork from going through.

13:31 Drew And by the way, he decided-

13:32 Adam No, but I gotta stop it now.

13:33 Drew He decided to live four hours apart from his children because he's four hours apart from his children. I'm unclear whether he's divorced or never married, college, had kids, got pregnant in college. No, whatever.

13:48 Adam What do you think? I'd like to know. Now I gotta know. Paul?

13:53 Caller Yes.

13:54 Adam Are you married?

13:56 Caller No, we never married. She did a 360 on me and started hitting me and calling me names and everything.

14:02 Drew By the way, 360 would be her right back where she started.

14:05 Adam You're facing the same direction. She did a 180 on you.

14:08 Caller Yeah.

14:08 Adam Right. All right. So she did a 180 on you and started beating on you.

14:13 Caller Yeah.

14:15 Adam So now she's raising the kids.

14:19 Drew So you have the... Sort of.

14:21 Caller 50-50 cut-thee.

14:22 Adam Well, 50-50, but you're four hours away and she's...

14:27 Drew How could that be 50-50?

14:28 Caller 50-50.

14:30 Adam Well, it's more like 70-50. All right, buddy, take care of those kids.

14:37 Drew Oh my. At least 26 take care of kids.

14:39 Adam Very articulate.

14:40 Drew God bless them.

14:41 Adam And puts together a very compelling argument.

14:43 Drew Cartman, better debater.

14:45 Adam She did a 360. Spencer. Yeah? You're 13? Yeah. What's happening? Girl? Yeah. What's going on, girly? Female girl, girl, person? Yeah.

15:06 Caller I've never heard of another girl, Spencer. But anyways.

15:10 Adam No, it's usually a dude name, but-

15:13 Drew You like that though, Adam.

15:14 Adam I love, I love that Joey and that- Sam, and what's it?

15:20 Drew Frankie.

15:22 Adam Frankie can go butch dyke though.

15:24 Drew Spencer.

15:25 Adam Spencer, that's a hot name for a chick.

15:28 Drew Thanks.

15:29 Adam You got it going on.

15:31 Drew What's up?

15:32 Adam Logan?

15:33 Drew I don't know, is that a girl?

15:33 Adam Logan's nice. That's nice for a girl. That's like with Spencer, there's not a lot of Logan guys out there either. All right, go ahead.

15:42 Caller Okay, well, over the past summer, I was put into a inpatient treatment for suicidal tendencies and depression. And I was put in by my dad and my parents are divorced and my mom basically didn't approve of it and she pulled me out early. So like my treatment wasn't finished there basically. And so, and this sounds really bad, but the people I met there, they gave me ideas to continue like my bad habits. Like drinking and experimenting with drugs, becoming sexually active.

16:22 Adam Well, Drew, what about that? I mean, don't some of those treatment places, isn't it sort of like prison, like a guy who's maybe a marginal offender gets put in with some hardcore people and all of a sudden turn into a hardened criminal?

16:36 Drew Yeah, and I'm not sure that has been thoroughly studied the way maybe it should have been. For instance, even in chemical dependency units, people will often find out how to use more harder forms.

16:49 Adam Yeah, I mean, I would think if you're talking about people in their 30s, it would be less likely.

16:57 Drew But a 13-year-old with a 17-year-old, and there's all sorts of discussion about whether these populations should be mixed and how you monitor them if they are.

17:04 Adam There's gonna be a lot of effing going on too. I mean, there's gonna be information and fluid exchange.

17:10 Drew Yeah, so that's not so good, Spencer, really. Really, but why don't you get back, it's all a sign that you're really seriously still in distress, so why don't you get back to the people that were treating you, at least make contact with them?

17:21 Caller Well, see, the problem is it was at like a hospital, like kind of far away from where I live, and my mom's really against it, and right now I'm seeing a therapist, but my therapist went on leave because her daughter is like ill or something. So I'm kind of left like deserted.

17:39 Drew But this is the issue, when you feel abandoned like that, that you start acting out. So you got to get a referral to somebody to connect with while your therapist is gone. This won't work if you're just sort of drifting out there.

17:53 Adam All right, baby doll.

17:53 Drew It's good that you know this. You got some insight.

17:56 Caller Yeah. Yeah, you're all right.

17:58 Adam You're 13.

17:58 Drew Just don't do these things you think are such great ideas. The solutions to your problems, what you think are solutions are the problems, are certainly going to become the problems if you indulge them. Well, I've already done them.

18:09 Adam All right, you got them out of your system. I'll tell you what would be good as a colonic, right, Drew?

18:15 Drew Yeah, they'll like your is everything. Ask, didn't we have Dave Navarro in here? Yeah.

18:19 Adam Got a lot of, a lot of what the body does is it stores toxins.

18:25 Drew Oh God.

18:26 Adam You're like a locker for toxins. You got to flush them out. Hey, you ever feel tired in the morning?

18:33 Drew Yeah.

18:33 Adam Alarm goes off. You don't feel like, like the alarm goes off. You wish you could sleep for another hour.

18:38 Caller How'd you know? Yeah.

18:40 Adam I know because you've stored toxins.

18:42 Drew Where'd I store them?

18:43 Adam They're in your bowel. They're in your lower intestine. Yeah.

18:46 Drew I got to get that out.

18:47 Adam Yeah. We live in a very toxic environment, Drew. Yeah. You could pass a big bowl load of toxins. You ever walk into a bathroom and it's really rank?

18:57 Drew Yes.

18:58 Adam Those are toxins. You're smelling other people's toxins.

19:01 Drew Oh my God.

19:02 Adam People got bad farts, like Jimmy.

19:04 Drew Oh, he's full of toxins.

19:08 Adam It's like a chemical planet exploding. You see what I'm saying?

19:11 Drew Yeah, I'm beginning to believe you.

19:13 Adam Yeah, actually, you should be doing that, man. Maybe Navarro's got a point. Michelle. 20, what's going on, baby doll?

19:26 Well, actually, I had a question for Dr. Drew about polycystic ovary disease. I was diagnosed with it about a year ago and I've been on medication for a very long time. And I was wondering, actually, if there's other alternatives than the medications I'm on.

19:40 Drew We have Glucophage?

19:41 I'm taking Glucophage, I'm taking Spironolactone, a thyroid pill and Yasmin Birth Control. Obviously, the birth control is gonna stay. But I'm taking all of the other medication too. And I was wondering, I'm actually taking the Spironol, what was that?

19:59 Drew Well, there's great enthusiasm in the endocrinologic community for exactly the way you're being treated, that there's insulin resistance in women with Polycystic Ovarian Disease. So you're on a medication that improves the insulin's utilized. And there's irregular, non-ovulatory cycling and there's no cycling sometimes. So the Yasmin takes care of that. And you're excessively estrogenized or androgenized, and the Yasmin may help with that. And then the thyroid is a common piece of the whole puzzle too. But I'll tell you from a sort of non-medicinal approach, the most important thing you can do is keep your weight down, manage your diet very judiciously and a diabetic style diet and exercise regularly. And that will do a ton.

20:45 Adam What is that? Why?

20:46 Drew Because that's the big problem is they tend to get overweight, they tend to get insulin resistant, and you can take care of all that with diet and exercise.

20:52 Adam Well, you gotta drink a ton of water.

20:54 Drew And get rid of the toxins.

20:56 Adam You gotta flush the toxins. Your body becomes like a sponge that stores toxins. I love when people give a bad, just retarded analogies. You know, they go like, you know how if you drop the sponge into a dirty sink filled with water, how it would absorb that dirty water, and then that would be in the contents of the sponge? Yes, your body's the same. It's like, hey, Dr. Tardo, just because you came up the lame analogy doesn't.

21:23 Drew People just love the imagery, they don't understand it. They've just studied science or biochemistry, it's all just magic to them.

21:29 Adam Yeah, it's plaque, it builds up, at least from years.

21:32 Drew You can shunt it.

21:35 Adam Yeah, yeah. I like, there's this new product out there now where the doctor comes out, I think it's called like Cortislam or something, but the guy starts with Dr. Cinnamone or whatever his name is and he goes, no offense to casual dieters, but this isn't for you. That's another, I like that approach too, where they go, look, if you're just trying to lose five or 10 pounds, this product is not for you. Don't tell me it's not for me.

22:01 Drew I'm a full-time professional dieter.

22:03 Adam He's offended. They have a very strong union too, the casual dieters union, the CDU. Oh man, it is a powerful lobby.

22:13 Drew I bet.

22:14 Adam Very powerful lobby, Drew. And you don't, they're like the NRA. They'll get you right out of office. You do not want to offend the casual dieters. All right.

22:24 Drew Take a break?

22:25 Adam Yeah. All right. I'm gonna take a little whiz.

22:28 Drew Yes.

22:28 Adam That's whiz. You know, I think, you know, my prom is.

22:32 Drew Which one?

22:33 Adam Well, this one. Drew and I urinate together as a bonding ritual. And as a release, there's a sexual component to it. Oftentimes. I'm not gonna lie to people. There's a definite sexual component to us urinating together. It's also, and more importantly, it's a social interaction that we have.

23:04 Drew Yeah, it's a social moment. And sexual, yeah, social.

23:06 Adam Drew tries to guess whether I ate asparagus or not.

23:11 Drew No, no, there's no guesswork on that one.

23:13 Adam He's almost a hundred percent on asparagus intake. Here's my point. I'm now used to urinating every 22 and a half minutes. Doesn't work great when I polish off my bottle of Cabernet and pass out at 2.30 in the morning. I get up at 2.52. You know, by the way, yes.

23:34 Drew Yeah, two, three times a night.

23:36 Adam Oh, you're with it.

23:37 Drew I thought it was just cause I'm getting older.

23:38 Adam I'm down to one. No, here's, here's my point.

23:42 Drew We have gotten our timing, right?

23:45 Adam Our kidneys into it might, I think if I go more than 30 minutes without urinating, I'm going to explode.

23:51 Drew It feels like it.

23:52 Adam I want to drive from my house in Santa Monica. I got catheterized myself.

23:56 Drew Could it have anything to do with the 40 cups of coffee we drink just before you go to bed and then two bottles of wine that you drink? No, no, let's go pee.

24:05 Adam All right. All right. I got it. I'm going to whiz on this. All right, we'll be back.

24:13 Caller So get your problems ready. Ready.

24:17 Every hour, two Americans under the age of 25 are infected with HIV. Protect yourself. Call toll free, 1-866-344-KNOW.

24:29 Caller Live, 1-0-5.

24:57 Adam Yeah, oh yeah. Well, I'll tell you what, we got a show going on, don't we, buddy? What time is it for everybody, boy? I'll tell you what time it is. It's 1128, that's 28 after the hour. That's what? That's 32. It's 1128, that's 28 after. 1128, that's 28 after 11. That's 32 to the top of the hour. 32 minutes to midnight straight up. It's 1128, that's 28 after the hour. 708, that's 8 minutes after 7. 56 degrees. Alrighty, let's get to the phones here, buddy. We gotta help the kids.

25:41 Drew Yeah, let's go.

25:41 Adam That's what I'm about.

25:42 Drew Yeah.

25:43 Adam I'm about the kitties. Jennifer? You're 15. 15 years old, yeah. Yeah, that's right. You think you're pregnant, baby doll?

25:52 Caller Yeah. Actually, I'm sexually active.

25:57 Adam Oh, really?

25:58 Caller Yeah. I was like back in February, like in the beginning of February, I went to go see my friend's friend. And one of my friend's friends, my friend Josh's friend, he was from out of town and we were both drunk and like we had sex. But I have a boyfriend, he lives in Nevada and I don't live with my parents. So my boyfriend thinks that I live with my aunt.

26:24 Drew Why don't you live with your parents?

26:25 Caller Because my parents live in Mexico.

26:27 Drew And how did you end up up here?

26:29 Caller Well, it's because like my parents used to live here. So like they moved to Mexico and I just stayed here because I didn't want to go. Like I told my boyfriend that I was staying with my aunt, but I'm not staying with my aunt anymore. I'm staying with my friend.

26:43 Drew Oh, boy.

26:43 Caller Yeah, and your parents, your parents.

26:46 Adam Hold on a second. Your parents moved back to Mexico.

26:49 Drew They just left you here? They just left you here?

26:51 Caller Well, it was my decision. Like I wanted to stay. I didn't want to go.

26:54 Drew Yeah, Jennifer, you're 15. You don't make this. You can't make. You're not in a position to make decisions.

26:58 Adam It's a different culture and we can't judge.

27:01 Drew It's illegal. It's abandoned. That's illegal.

27:04 Adam We cannot judge. Different culture. Everything's the same. Why did they move back to Mexico? Low self-esteem or what happened?

27:13 Drew Why did they move back there?

27:14 Adam I don't know.

27:14 Caller They just moved back there so I don't know.

27:17 Drew What do you mean you don't know? They didn't have any discussion? You came home one day and they left a note, gone to Mexico?

27:22 Caller They didn't tell me. They just said, no, we're moving to Mexico. I'm like, I don't want to move. So like, no, my aunt had custody of me, but I don't live with her no more. So like, I'm living with my friend, Moe, and I had sex with them too, but my boyfriend doesn't know.

27:39 Drew Jennifer, you got to get some help.

27:41 Caller Right now, I think I'm pregnant, but I don't know, and I'm scared because I've had these bumps in my vagina too, and they look like pimples, and I'm afraid that that might affect the baby if I'm pregnant.

27:54 Adam Hey, Jennifer.

27:55 Caller Yeah.

27:56 Adam You got any brothers or sisters or anything?

27:59 Caller Yeah, but they don't live here. They left.

28:01 Adam They left to Mexico.

28:03 Drew And you don't know how or why?

28:05 Adam Okay, and you're living with your aunt. Oh, no, you're not living with your aunt. You're living with your friend.

28:10 Caller My boyfriend thinks I'm living with my aunt.

28:11 Adam Right, right.

28:12 Drew Hey, you want me to hire the park? Why don't you check out the Hillside Home for Children? Go to Hillside. It's over there on Avenue 64.

28:19 Caller Avenue 54?

28:20 Drew 64.

28:21 Caller 64?

28:22 Drew Yeah, Hillside.

28:23 Adam Well, hold on a second.

28:24 Drew Throw yourself on their mercy.

28:26 Adam Yeah, Jennifer, look, first off, your boyfriend is in Nevada. Forget about him. Break up with him.

28:34 Drew Well, she needs more, she can't handle stuff like that. She needs somebody to intervene here and take her off the street. Basically, she's on the street.

28:42 Adam Yes. Okay, listen, Jennifer, here's the whole thing. I don't want you to end up a statistic, and I don't want to pay for all your crappy kids either. So it's a win-win thing. I want you to work out well, and I want it for selfish reasons, too, but that doesn't mean I don't care about you. Stop having sex with these guys, number one. Number two, yes, you're going to have to go somewhere, and at the Hillside, we've been there, right, Drew?

29:11 Drew Yeah.

29:11 Adam We toured Hillside?

29:13 Drew Yes.

29:13 Adam Yes, we did.

29:14 Drew It's right near where she's living right now.

29:16 Adam It is, isn't it? All right, where is it? Write that down.

29:19 Drew I told her, having a 64.

29:20 Adam She doesn't know. Jennifer? Do you have...

29:24 Drew I'm 64 in Meridian, I think is where it is.

29:26 Adam Do you have something called a pen? You do? Yeah. All right, so you write...

29:32 Drew I don't know if they necessarily can take her in, but they might be referring her out.

29:35 Adam Well, they're going to help her somehow.

29:37 Drew Yeah, exactly.

29:37 Adam They got a real nice facility over there.

29:39 Drew Planned Parenthood is another thing to check out. Pasadena has a Planned Parenthood.

29:43 Adam All right, Avenue 64.

29:44 Caller Avenue 64.

29:46 Adam Hillside.

29:47 Drew Home for Children.

29:48 Adam Home for Children. I took a tour of the place. Great people, great facility. All right, they're going to take care of you. Take care of yourself, baby doll. Call us up and tell us how you're doing, all right?

30:04 Drew Who the odd?

30:06 Adam Parents just went back to Mexico.

30:07 Drew Yeah, took off. Something's, many things missing, many pieces missing. For all we know, they may have, you know, begged Jennifer to come with them and she just took off or something.

30:19 Adam You're right.

30:20 Drew You know, I was listening to an interesting story about the history of psychologists. They were talking about Skinner and aversive condition, this kind of stuff. He was talking about how animals learn in the face of aversive stimuli. That if you take an animal and put it like on an electrical grid and the light comes on and electricity comes through it, the animal flies off it. It takes about one time that every time that light goes on now, the animal's jumping.

30:44 Adam Right. That's how animals learn.

30:46 Drew That's how humans are.

30:46 Adam That's how they survive.

30:47 Drew But that's how humans are when they're younger, when their parents strike them. The parents hit them, you got to do that once, and the kids are like, OK, you come near me again, I'm out of here. They take off.

30:58 Adam Right. So that's what happens. There may be a little domestic violence there.

31:02 Drew Yeah, I'm just out, and they don't listen, they don't hear, they don't care, they just come out of here. I'm out.

31:07 Adam Clint, you're saying you should beat your kids. Hey, Clint, what's happening? 25.

31:13 Yes, Adam, you need to write a book. You're sitting on a goldmine here with great ideas and good comedy. You got to cash in on that.

31:23 Adam Well, let me tell you what keeps me from writing a book.

31:26 Drew Hey, you wrote a book.

31:28 Adam I did?

31:29 Drew Yeah, we wrote a book together, remember?

31:30 Adam I never read that book.

31:31 Drew Yeah, you did. I read it to you.

31:33 Adam You read our book?

31:34 Drew Yes, I read it to you.

31:35 Adam Did I enjoy it?

31:37 Drew Yeah, you did. Especially, Adam.

31:41 Adam Here's the, there's a couple elements that stop me from writing a book. A, lazy.

31:46 Caller Okay, I got that figured out.

31:49 Adam B, actually not illiterate, but...

31:53 Damn near.

31:54 Caller Doesn't matter.

31:57 Adam No, I'm not, I'm not really, realistically, I read at a solid 9th grade level. But I spell at like a 3rd grade level. And he mixes spelling and the lazy. And then third, very unnurturing environment. I got to stare at Dr. Drew just looking at me like a grouper through the wall of an aquarium.

32:16 Drew But that doesn't affect your writing when you're out of here.

32:19 Adam No, but I'm not, I'm not sure what's genius and what isn't. You see, I, when I, later on when I leave the station, often times the following day, people say, I heard that rap about this or that. I was laughing my ass off. And I say, what are you talking about? And they'll say, whatever it was. And I don't know what they're talking about. Because when you're in a room with two people that don't care, Two? Well, make it Ann and Anderson and whoever. Chris. Well, that's what I'm counting. Chris and you is actually in the room and then outside. Well, sometimes you do and sometimes you don't. The point is, you don't really know if something's funny or not, because you got a couple of people just are sitting there going, all right, take some calls. And so it doesn't register in your head.

32:58 Caller Oh, I got to write a book.

33:00 Adam It's more like I got to write a book called, let's take some goddamn calls. You see what I'm saying? What are you doing? What are you going to do, Clint?

33:08 Caller Well, here's what I here's how you can get around some of that. I mean, the creativity part, I think, is already solid. You are a you know, you're a genius. We know you're a genius.

33:17 Adam So, yes. Thank you.

33:19 Caller We're past that. Secondly, you can speak into a computer and it'll just type everything out.

33:25 Adam Right. They, you know, they talk about that. But then it's like you go, my name is Adam. And it and it and it and it writes down, I've entered the front door and I've defecated on the carpet. It's like, have they worked out those things yet?

33:44 Caller The software is pretty good now except, except and it's not, it shouldn't be your first choice because it does take a while to set up. You got to read pages and pages so it can understand your dialect.

33:53 Adam You got to program it.

33:54 Caller But look at it this way, even Malcolm X didn't write his own book. He talked, he told it, told his autobiography through Alex Haley.

34:02 Adam Oh, that's what I got to do, get the guy who wrote Roots to write my book.

34:08 Caller Or Dr. Drew, or anybody who, you know, you can just kind of yell at. You know, you could rant and you got some great ideas for taking over the world.

34:15 Adam I appreciate it. I appreciate it and I thank you. My self-esteem is too low to write a book. I realize I'm a genius, but I also have to weigh that against low self-esteem.

34:30 Drew Adam has an aversion to his creativity being contained in something so non-ephemeral as the written word.

34:41 Adam You're lucky.

34:41 Drew In other words, your creativity, your creative process has to exist in time and space. It can't be contained on a page. It ruins it. It spoils it somehow.

34:52 Adam Yeah.

34:52 Drew Right? And you're lazy.

34:55 Adam I'm lazy. We'll move on to calls, but here's the whole thing. I was thinking about this because I went out to New York and I did this basically this stand-up gig. And I had to host this show and I had to go open this decent size theater with, I don't know, five, eight minutes of stand-up comedy. And it went pretty good and it was fine. And I thought when I walked off stage, I thought, no, I could do stand-up. And then I thought, I can't stand telling the same joke. I don't mind having the same thoughts, which I oftentimes do, but sometimes writing it down and just saying the same joke over and over again. Well, it's like sort of what's the essence of humor. And it's sort of stop me if you've heard this one.

35:39 Drew Yeah.

35:40 Adam Well, if I heard this one, there's nothing worse than someone going, hey, let me tell you a funny story about what happened today. Well, if the guy told you the same same story last week, it's not so funny.

35:49 Drew Right.

35:50 Adam So it feels anti humor, it feels anti essence of humor to write it down and repeat it.

35:57 Drew Right.

35:57 Adam On the other hand, that's how you do it.

35:59 Drew Right.

36:00 Adam So the thing I like about the radio is you just keep yammering and it just flies off into space and you never have to actually corral it and do anything with it.

36:09 Drew Yeah. Woody Allen was able to keep things, you know, use different mediums to keep things renewed.

36:14 Adam Yeah. I love Woody Allen movies, but if you watch his movies, you'll see the same joke happen.

36:19 Drew No.

36:19 Adam Over and over again.

36:20 Drew I understand. It's similar material, but it's new every time. New twist to it.

36:28 Adam Yeah.

36:28 Drew It's got a great event to it.

36:30 Adam Listen, the jury's still out. The kid's got some good ideas.

36:33 Caller We'll see how he does.

36:34 Adam I'm doing another 30 movies and we'll see. Contessa? You're 20?

36:40 Hi, Adam. Hi, Dr. Drew. I would say that pie is so much better than cake.

36:45 Adam Yes.

36:46 Drew Yes, it is. And it keeps too. If you can get it to stay around without people destroying it, eating it, it's good for a few days.

36:54 Adam Yeah, pie will last. Listen, a pumpkin pie will last for two or three weeks in the refrigerator. The only problem is it won't last for two or three weeks. That's right. People love it so much.

37:07 Caller They love that pie. Don't drop trial.

37:09 Adam I'll drop trial. Cake lasts too, but no one gives a rat's ass. Just admit I'm right about the cake pie thing and let's move forward.

37:20 Exactly.

37:21 Adam Thank you.

37:22 Well, about three months ago, I met this guy. It was his birthday. I guessed his sign. I found out that he's a sound guy and that he does recording for Bay Area bands. I'm a singer-songwriter and he told me how much he liked to work with me. And things just went from there and we started like working together and then it got romantic. And I was thinking that he was about 24, 25 and his looks are very deceiving. Coming to find out he was 29.

37:58 Adam Oh my goodness.

37:59 Yeah, really young looking for. I was amazed.

38:02 Adam Good gravy.

38:05 And so, you know, it kind of worried me and we talked about it and he said that, you know, my age never seemed to like make a difference and that, you know, so far it didn't seem like there was this age difference with us.

38:19 Adam Right. He was saying AIDS.

38:22 What?

38:24 Adam He was saying AIDS, not age. You didn't have sex with him, did you?

38:29 No, we never, I never did. Good.

38:31 Drew He was saying his AIDS didn't make a difference.

38:34 Adam You had oral, did you do oral sex? Is third base oral now?

38:41 Drew Is it?

38:42 It's not.

38:43 Adam It is now.

38:44 Drew It didn't used to be.

38:45 Adam It didn't used to be, but it never really had a place on the diamond.

38:48 Drew It was when you came back to the dugout.

38:51 Adam You might get a quick BJ on the way back from like the Bat Boy.

38:54 Drew No, after you've rounded the bases.

38:56 Adam Yeah, right.

38:58 Drew You're...

38:59 Adam Yeah, alright.

39:00 Drew You're packing it in.

39:02 Adam Contestant is 20. She thought the guy was 25. Turns out he's 29.

39:07 Drew That's not a big deal.

39:09 Adam What's the deal?

39:09 So now, after like about three months, I find out that, you know, I get this little kind of tiff or whatever, and then I start talking about my feelings or whatever, and he tells me, you know what, I don't care, and if you don't like it, then just don't come over here anymore, and totally like decides he's gonna blow me off. And so, now I'm wondering, like, I don't know, it seems like, I guess it could have been a too good to be true kind of thing, but I really like, we've got all these, like, ties now with, like, music and things. I was really getting things started, and now I don't know.

39:44 Adam All right, hold on, hold on.

39:45 Drew Whoa, how long were you dating him for?

39:47 Caller Three months.

39:48 Adam All right, he was just having a good time.

39:50 Drew Yeah, what are you, Contessa, is this your first relationship?

39:53 Adam Yeah, you sound, you sound green, baby.

39:57 Drew Well, have you had a lot of chaotic relationships? One or the other, this is brand new, or you generally have chaotic relationships that don't last?

40:04 Caller I guess it's not any more chaotic than other people's relationships, come on.

40:08 Drew Yeah, it is.

40:10 Adam People say that a lot. I'm never even sure what that means, like, when they go, you know, when like, Joe Jackson will do that, like, well, sure, we have problems like any other family.

40:22 Drew Right, that's a total cop-out, complete and total cop-out.

40:25 Adam Yeah, it is, and why is it relevant anyway?

40:28 Drew That's like saying, well, I have pancreatic cancer, but just like every other, eventually somebody gets cancer, everyone gets that. It's like, no, yeah, this is serious stuff.

40:36 Adam You're not bad.

40:37 Caller I need someone to tell me that.

40:39 Adam Okay, so look, this guy may have just been hanging out, having a good time, seeing if he could get past third base with you.

40:47 Drew Or who knows, or maybe he just had enough of Contesta's kind of chaos, just kind of bailed out.

40:53 Adam Whatever it is, it was three months, you had some asses and giggles, and you're moving forward. Or he's moving forward.

41:02 Caller Okay, well how do I get my things back from his house? How do I talk to this guy after this?

41:06 Adam Well, you have things that are legitimately yours. Like what's there? Is anything worth anything?

41:16 Drew Like what?

41:18 Adam Like wanting to see him.

41:19 Caller I got him this like nice little chair for his like recording studio.

41:23 Drew Yeah, that's his. What did you leave there?

41:25 Caller Well, I told him I needed it back because I was just giving it to him because I didn't have room in my house.

41:31 Drew All right. See, this is craziness.

41:33 Adam Yeah, it's just you don't have it. You just you want to confront him.

41:36 Drew Right.

41:37 Adam You want to get hurt.

41:37 Drew You want to stay involved. You want to keep the dance going.

41:39 Adam Here's what's going on. I think he saw hers a little too young and a little too nutty. Had some kicks, realized she's a little too mature and a little chaotic. And now she's coming after him.

41:50 Drew Right. And by the way, when he backed off, it was because she was dumping on him about the age thing. He came coming at him. And how dare you? And he went, fine, that's it. I'm out. And then when he was out, he was out.

42:01 Adam It's been 13 minutes since we've gone number one.

42:03 Drew Let's go. All right.

42:04 Adam We'll be back.

42:05 Caller Dude, you got issues. 1-800-LOVE-191.

42:10 Adam Here, buddy. It's Adam.

42:12 Drew And I'm Dr. Drew.

42:13 Adam Here to talk about Axe Deodorant Body Spray.

42:15 Drew Yes, sir.

42:16 Adam You spray that on, you give stink the axe.

42:34 All right, all right, all right.

42:36 Adam It's Loveline now. Get a hand in. Get a hand in and grab an E. Don't sit down. Don't sit on your fanny, son. Grab an E. Hey, that helmet, that's not a chair. Why is it when you're like teaching gym or a football, Pop Warner football coach, even the things are just marginally entertaining, are boy, this guy, he is the Lenny Bruce of Pop Warner football coaches. This guy, he's the Mort Sall of gym, cause he's sharp, wit. Oh man, is this kid fast. I love when they do that. It's like big laughs. Look at Tyings like kissing your sister. I got this one. All right, gather up, gentlemen. And I used that term loosely. Same blowhard jokes year after year. Yeah. That was a big deal though in Pop Warner football. No sitting down. Yeah. A grab a knee, grab a knee. Really? Look, are we resting or aren't we? Cause if we're resting, I'd like to sit on my can. Number one, what's the grab a knee part? And two, I don't know, from a posture standpoint, from an orthopedic standpoint, how about this? How about we relax and I do it in whatever way I'm most comfortable. Sitting Indian style, two knees, one knee, one knee ass, whatever, like the lie down, whatever it is, we're not running laps, are we? Let's just start, it's gravity, gravity. And like I said, God forbid once in a while a guy would sit on his helmet and then you'd get the, it's not a chair, which, that's the best you're gonna, that's it?

44:14 Drew That's the reason?

44:15 Caller That's, cause it's not.

44:16 Adam And by the way, I don't know, isn't anything you're sitting on a chair? Right. Technically.

44:21 Drew A stool at least.

44:22 Adam It's something, yeah. All right. Jessica? Uh-huh. Once I'd like to flip it around, I'd like to put a, start putting a chair onto my head and have a coach tell me it's not a helmet. That folding chair is not a helmet, son. Get that off your head. Like maybe after the Russian circus or something. Jessica? You're 20?

44:47 Drew 20 is what it says. You're 15?

44:56 Caller I'm 15 and I'm sexually active, but I cannot have intercourse. I can only have it anal-y. And I don't know if it will work. I'm uncomfortable. Like I'm about to do it with my boyfriend and we've been together for seven months. And every time that I'm ready to do it, I can't.

45:10 Drew But you are doing it the other way.

45:11 Caller Yes, that's the only way that I feel comfortable doing it.

45:14 Drew Sure. What do you mean comfortable?

45:15 Adam Well, she's old fashioned. She's an old fashioned girl, Drew.

45:20 Caller Because when I'm about to have an affair, I get nervous. And I'm like, no, no, no, he gets all mad. I don't know, another way, I'm just comfortable with it.

45:31 Adam This, by the way, when I'm in charge, you're going to be, she'll be tagged.

45:36 Drew Yeah, caribou.

45:37 Adam Cataloged.

45:37 Drew Caribou.

45:39 Adam Pow with the North plant. I powered air rifle. Boom, right in the side of the arm.

45:43 Drew Jessica, what does the way God intended it, I guess, though not at your age, what is it about that that makes it anxiety provoking?

45:53 Adam I like the part where boyfriend gets mad.

45:56 Drew Why does that make you anxious? Why does it make you nervous?

45:58 Adam Wait, wait a minute. How old is your boyfriend? He's 17. And she's 15 and no?

46:09 Drew Yes.

46:12 Adam What are you using for birth control?

46:18 Drew You're on the depot shot.

46:19 Caller Excellent.

46:20 Drew And so what does it make you?

46:23 Caller I'm on the spot because I'm ready. Okay, I'm ready to have an emergency. Every time when it comes down to it, I can't do it.

46:30 Drew What's the anxiety about, do you know?

46:32 Caller Excuse me?

46:35 Drew Why were you nervous?

46:36 Caller I'm not nervous, it's just that I'm getting into it and we're about to do it and I'm like, no, no, no. It's uncomfortable, like I don't know, I just get in a comfortable feeling.

46:47 Drew Were you sexually abused when you were a kid?

46:49 Caller Well, when I was seven, I was like, abused, yeah, but not raped completely.

46:53 Adam Well, who sexually abused you?

46:57 Drew That may be material that you've not yet worked through and naturally enough, you're of course sort of reenacting all of that again by being so sexually active and sort of in a peculiar way and although when you actually get to vaginate, of course, it gives you a panic attack, you know, flashback.

47:14 Adam Well, it takes a village.

47:15 Drew It takes a village. So Jessica, please, this is all related to that event. So maybe get some treatment.

47:24 Adam The neighbor.

47:24 Drew Oh, I see, I see, I see.

47:26 Adam Yeah, Jessica, don't, okay, you got to get therapy. You were sexually abused. That's all, I don't know any other way to say it. It's been six and a half minutes. We have to urinate again. We'll be back after this.

47:37 Caller Alright, guys.

47:38 Bottom line, here's the deal. Looking to hook up. Sick of wasting time with the wrong person.

47:43 Caller One call is all you need to make.

47:44 Call the dateline.

47:45 Caller 877-889-DATE.

47:51 Caller Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

47:53 1-800-LOVE-191.

47:59 Caller This hour brought you apart by Axe.

48:01 Experience the Axe Effect.

48:35 Caller I'll tell you, I call my right hand, I was like, well, I got some fact.

48:40 Adam Dr. Drew, about to end for my Tennessee. Now, I'll tell you, here's, let me tell you what I heard about Tennessee.

48:46 Caller And so did I. And so did I. And so did I. Yeah. All right, we got to get my own book, and I was speaking to Michelle over here today. You're so going to like that. She does it. Let me hear you describe it. Bob said, and all of a sudden, I suppose, oh, I thought, look at that. I'm so, Drew, when I was 18, I don't know about you, but I was all, and also, so, so, so, I thought.

49:15 Drew And then Anderson, did you hear him at the intro?

49:19 Caller He was absorbed. Well, Michelle. How you doing? What is up? What is your name? Double it.

49:31 Caller What?

49:31 Caller I have a little question of Loveline. Go right ahead, my boy.

49:40 Caller And my grandma actually died from it.

49:42 Caller All of it.

49:45 Caller Well, ever since I was little, my mom told me don't sleep with a bra on. So, I was wondering if, I just assumed that it increased your chances of getting breast cancer.

49:55 Caller Well, hold on a second. Drew, his mom was a grandmother, was a breast cancer. She said, well, some level of the bra on, and I'm thinking, I'll stop it all over.

50:14 Caller Hello?

50:14 Caller Michelle? So let's have a good doctor over here. I'm just a humble radio. Drew, let me tell you something. I sit there every night with his mama. He sits here like a blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But as soon as I start all the blah, blah, blah, blah, he's like, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, hey, blah, blah, blah, blah. Drew, I tell you, I tried to make love to my wife the other day. You want to talk about how-

51:26 Drew You want to talk about how- You want to talk about how-

51:32 Caller You want to talk about how-

51:33 How-

51:33 Drew How-

51:33 Caller 24, 25, 27. Michelle. What's up with breast cancer? What's up with breast cancer?

51:53 Caller No, what I'm trying to say is that my grandma's the one that had breast cancer, not me, but my mom actually has the part that she found that was breast cancer, so I'm just trying to figure out if I have a chance of having breast cancer, and if I'm not able to get it, well, there are chances.

52:03 Caller What, what, what?

52:09 Caller What? I'm still trying to get it.

52:15 Drew Michelle, wearing the bra at night will accomplish nothing. And how old was your grandmother when she had breast cancer?

52:24 Caller I believe she was 52.

52:26 Drew So she's relatively young. And there are genetic tests you can get to see if you actually are at a special risk of breast cancer. What?

52:40 Caller What's up about the Newsweek? What's up about the article? What's up about radical misactivation?

53:18 Drew It's just important. And so it's important to get regular breast exam, learn self-examination techniques and get regular mammograms.

53:23 Caller Well, speaking of self-examination, I was in the shower, I was on a breast, but testicular cancer. I'm there with some time. Now I'm in there, you know, picking me up, I was on a loofah, I was on a loofah, and I'm there, and I hear, on the door, I'm like, what's going on?

54:23 Drew Did read recently that breast cancer, excuse me, lung cancer has surpassed breast cancer as leading cause of cancer death in women. So something to keep in mind, those of you that are smoking, and even the smoking impact of smoking will last well beyond the decades after which you have stopped smoking. Let's say if you smoke for a few years, now as a young person, think you're out of the woods, you won't be.

54:43 Caller Well, all of a sudden, what Drew's saying is just because blah, doesn't mean blah. All right.

54:51 Adam All right, let's go to somewhere else, Drew.

54:55 Drew It's hard to gibberish.

54:57 Caller Oh, you want to hear that?

54:58 Adam Drew, you're such a, you know, you're such a, you're a sucker for gibberish.

55:02 Drew Evidently. That and the rape descriptions, the rape crime.

55:08 Adam Well, it's rape. It's a violent crime.

55:11 Drew It's a violent crime. Your mom raised you with that notion, right? It's a violent crime.

55:16 Adam It's not a sexual crime.

55:17 Drew No, it's nothing sexual.

55:19 Adam It's an act of violence where you come at the end. But it is, do not mistake it for a sexual crime. It is a violent, violent crime.

55:30 Drew Same as if you robbed a bank.

55:31 Adam And, but it'd come. But it is, it is, it is.

55:35 Drew Not sexual though.

55:38 Adam No, no, it is a physical, violent assault where you come. It's no different than if you were just walking your dog down the sidewalk and I came up behind you with a bat and viciously started attacking you and then came.

55:59 Drew It is no different. That's right, that's right. Same, same, same.

56:03 Adam Right, it is a crime, violent, violent crime where you come. Manuel?

56:11 Yes.

56:12 Adam You're 25?

56:13 Caller Yes.

56:14 Adam Can we already talk to him? All right. You peed with a boner in the morning.

56:21 Caller Yeah.

56:23 Adam Now your orgasms don't feel as good.

56:26 Caller Yeah, that's exactly it. I think like every guy, I wake up in the morning with wood and you know, I had to go to the restroom. And so I, you know, every morning this happens, but this morning I just couldn't hold it in, right? So I just, I went and stood in the bathtub and just kind of, you know, went.

56:45 Caller Yeah.

56:46 Adam Here's a tip. You don't have to actually climb inside the tub. If you're confident enough.

56:52 Drew It's quite an image though. It conjures up quite a sense of a poignant image.

56:57 Adam You stand outside the tub, learn this through trial and error.

57:00 I would, yeah.

57:02 Caller Well, I was really going. I mean, I was more straight up than straight out. So it wasn't really going to go forward. So I was just kind of afraid that.

57:11 Adam Okay.

57:13 Drew And God forbid you sneeze.

57:15 Adam All right. So you're, so when you have an erection, you're up like, like if it was a drawbridge, it would be half open.

57:24 Caller Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I go, I go, you know, almost all the way open.

57:32 Adam It's the belly.

57:34 Caller All right.

57:35 Adam So anyway, so you think you've done some damage in terms of sensitivity?

57:39 Caller I don't know. To me, it seems like it, that it doesn't seem nearly as good. And, and I didn't really think that too much of it until recently, I, the two separate girls hadn't even thought that I'd gone, you know? And so I'm thinking that maybe I get so little actual movement and reaction down there during the actual, you know, dropping of the load.

58:06 Drew So you sort of, you feel like you pulled a muscle down there or something.

58:09 Caller Yeah.

58:10 Drew There's something to that.

58:12 Adam During the actual dropping of the load. The dropping of load sounds like some sort of a ceremony that has been passed down through generations of the ceremonial dropping of the load.

58:22 Drew Well, it sounds like a druid ritual.

58:26 Adam Yeah.

58:27 Drew Something at Stonehand or something.

58:29 Adam Yeah, something you might get some B-list celebrity to do in your town. Now, for the ceremonial dropping of the load, you know her as the black chick from Star Trek.

58:41 Drew Star Trek.

58:42 Adam Then she would make some sort of announcement. What about it, Drew? There's nothing you can do.

58:48 Drew There's nothing you can do. It doesn't conjure in my mind anything specific. I bet it's just maybe an irritation or something in that area that I can't... You will go away. I can't imagine it's anything serious. You don't have to have anything done with it. If it continues to be a urologist.

59:04 Adam Julie. Julie. Yes.

59:11 I was raped when I was 13 and it didn't really affect me.

59:18 Adam Drew thinks that's funny by the way, I don't.

59:24 And it's just like, it's, I don't know, seems to be troubling me now.

59:29 Adam This fam, how old was the family friend?

59:31 Uh-huh, he was 22.

59:35 Drew And it really sounds more like a rape, huh?

59:36 Adam Yeah, she said rape.

59:38 Drew Oh, I'm sorry, I thought she said molested.

59:39 Adam Well, screen CC, I told you, reading poisons your mind. It's what you get for reading.

59:44 Drew Were you molested at a younger age? Nothing, you weren't victimized in any way prior to that? Was this a violent act or was it just sort of an exploitation where he kind of seduced you?

59:59 Adam Violent, and did you report him?

1:00:02 Caller What?

1:00:03 Caller Did you report him?

1:00:04 Caller I don't know, cause it was like my best friend's older brother's friend.

1:00:09 Adam Oh, I see.

1:00:10 Drew Somebody that close to your family, I mean.

1:00:12 Adam Yeah, I don't-

1:00:12 Drew Your best friend's older brother's friend's cousin's girlfriend.

1:00:15 Adam I don't know what your point was, so you mean he was, you knew him too well or you didn't know him well enough or?

1:00:22 Caller I didn't really know him, like that was the first time I met him.

1:00:25 Drew Wouldn't you want to report that?

1:00:29 Caller I don't know, I guess I was embarrassed about it.

1:00:32 Adam Right.

1:00:33 Drew All right, but that means you're a victim, Julie. I mean, they don't stand up for yourself.

1:00:37 Adam You can't, you know, 13 year olds, a lot of shame.

1:00:39 Drew I understand people get confused and ashamed of themselves, but usually they'll register some defense on their own behalf.

1:00:44 Adam Did you have any kind of crush on him or anything before this?

1:00:50 Drew Especially when this is an especially violent and scary event.

1:00:53 Adam Yeah, the only reason I asked about the crush thing is if you can feel a little guilty if you're attracted to somebody and then they do this, you think somehow you willed it or you were participating in it or something like that. And what do you mean? Now, where did this happen?

1:01:08 Caller It was at my friend's house.

1:01:10 Adam And where was your friend?

1:01:11 Caller She was in the other room because her parents were out of town and so they were having a party and I went over there.

1:01:20 Adam And did you scream for help?

1:01:24 Caller I tried but it was like too big.

1:01:28 Adam And he really violently tore your clothes off?

1:01:37 Drew And you didn't report this?

1:01:41 Caller Cause my parents didn't know that I was over there, like that her parents went out of town and I don't know.

1:01:47 Drew I didn't want them to know that. I see the whole situation you were hiding. Oh my goodness.

1:01:50 Adam Cause this guy's an animal. This is a 22 year old guy hitting a 13 year old and raping her.

1:01:56 Drew Oh my God, of course it's about, Julie, this is something that needs to be treated. It would be bizarre if you didn't have emotional consequences from something like that. And I would bet that there was more things going on that you, not that you put yourself in a situation so much as the things that were coming to bear at that time, you couldn't be honest with your parents and you couldn't speak up for yourself when you were the victim of a violent, this was truly a violent, this was sort of, we've been kidding about this, but here it is. Even with the sexual part of it, it was a violent crime in her case.

1:02:31 Adam Yeah, all right, so Julie, you gotta get some therapy.

1:02:35 Drew Are you in college now?

1:02:37 Caller Yes.

1:02:38 Drew All right, go to the mental health services at the college. Are you having panic attacks or nightmares or flashbacks or something?

1:02:44 Caller And like, my boyfriend is really like supportive and like helping me out and stuff through it, but.

1:02:51 Drew Well, there's nothing he can really do other than get you to the therapist. So go to the mental health services at the school. Listen, one of the real frustrating challenges of dealing with college age kids is that they go to institution, how dare you, but socks the mic every night. Don't you know where your hand is? How could this is a huge instrument in front of you? How could you hit it with your coffee truck?

1:03:10 Adam Drew's reacting to me reacting to him punching the mic on a nightly basis. But you got to understand, you do it every night. I do it once every six years.

1:03:20 Drew Yes, that's true. Okay, but be that as it may, that was Julie. One of the frustrating thing about dealing with college age kids is they go to institutions where are these very well developed, elaborate health care systems and mental health care systems, especially designed for free for them, for their age specifically, and they just don't go.

1:03:40 Adam Oh, wait a minute, but I smell junior college. Julie?

1:03:43 Drew Yeah.

1:03:43 Adam You going to junior college?

1:03:46 Drew Fresno State?

1:03:47 Adam Four year?

1:03:48 Drew Yes.

1:03:49 Adam I got a lot of friends have turned junior college into a nine year program, but you're going to regular, you're going to Fresno State? Okay, so avail yourself of all they have.

1:04:00 Drew Yeah, use this stuff, use this for the services, all right?

1:04:02 Adam Take care of yourself.

1:04:04 Drew This should be a highly treatable thing.

1:04:05 Adam And by the way, you're not gonna walk in and talk about this with somebody and have them look at your cross-eyed. This is probably 80% of the stuff that comes in there with young women at college age is talking about this kind of stuff. They probably have groups and counseling and the whole nine yards just specifically for being rape victims or survivors. Are you ready to roll here, Drew? Let's talk to April, who's 20, April. Hey.

1:04:35 Best Of You're my god.

1:04:36 Adam Thank you.

1:04:42 Best Of My question for you guys is, if I normally get strep throat probably about four times a year. Well, wait a minute.

1:04:49 Drew Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. How is that documented?

1:04:53 Best Of I just, for the past probably four or five years ever since eighth grade, I seem to get it about four times a year.

1:04:59 Drew How is it documented that it's in fact strep?

1:05:03 Best Of I go to the doctor.

1:05:05 Drew And they do a strep test? They do a culture or a strep test on you?

1:05:08 Best Of Yeah, they do.

1:05:10 Drew And each time it comes up strep?

1:05:12 Best Of Yep.

1:05:13 Drew That does not make sense. Why not? Why would one person, a recurrent strep? Do you have large tonsils?

1:05:22 Caller I don't think so.

1:05:23 Best Of They haven't ever said anything.

1:05:25 Caller I don't see them, so I think...

1:05:27 Drew I mean, the only thing I could think of that would be putting you at risk of recurrent bacterial infections would be tonsils that need to come out. And there's a sort of rule of thumb. If you have more than four infections a year, they come out.

1:05:38 Adam Oh, really?

1:05:39 Drew So that would be one sort of...

1:05:40 Best Of They had said something about that, about that if I keep getting it, they want to take it out.

1:05:45 Drew All right, so that's, you need to do that.

1:05:48 Best Of But I need to get it whenever I deep throat, I end up getting it.

1:05:53 Adam You do that at the doctor's office?

1:05:56 Best Of Yeah, Adam. My doctor and I have a personal relationship like that.

1:06:00 Adam Well, Drew has a policy when they can't pony up the deductible for the medical insurance. I mean, things run differently in different places. All right, whatever. All right, so you're pretty snobby for someone who does a lot of deep throating. Usually, they're more laid back breed. You have a boyfriend?

1:06:18 Caller I don't.

1:06:20 Adam You don't. But you still manage to do a fair bit of deep throating.

1:06:24 Caller Well, sometimes.

1:06:26 Adam I like that. I don't like the deep throating because to me, it's like I don't want my bait to be gobbled up by the fish that way. It makes me feel like a worm in the, you know, in a big mouth bass.

1:06:40 Drew You feel small.

1:06:41 Adam Yeah. Well, I'd like a little gagging and a little like this. I'd like I'd like just like a little like, oh, my God, or I can barely get my hand around it twice or, you know, something like that. Like, I don't like that.

1:06:52 Best Of We'll work on that when you and I get together.

1:06:53 Adam Yeah.

1:06:55 Drew But they.

1:06:56 Adam Here's what I'd like you to do. First off, no talking when you're doing it, because that's a bad sign, too. Like you're going like, oh, yeah, baby, that feels good. And they're like, yeah, hey, thanks. You shouldn't be able to form sentences with my penis in your mouth. And then and then number two, I want you I want some like you don't have to say like, oh, it's so big, but I want some like, oh, like, you know, when you first see it, you know, you go, oh, you know what I mean?

1:07:25 Drew Yeah.

1:07:25 Adam Try that.

1:07:26 But then you'd go, no, I'll try that, Adam.

1:07:28 Adam No, I, you know, go with it. You know, look, here's what I'm saying.

1:07:32 Drew You'd feel disingenuous.

1:07:34 Adam You've gotten bad haircuts, right? But then people have come up and BS you a little. No, you look good. You look good. You believe them, right?

1:07:42 Drew Yeah.

1:07:42 Adam You know, it's a bad haircut.

1:07:43 Drew I can't see the haircut.

1:07:45 Adam But you think they like it.

1:07:46 Drew I can't see the haircut.

1:07:47 Adam You got a mirror, don't you, Google?

1:07:49 Drew Yeah, but you're not like, huh?

1:07:53 Adam You see them looking at you with your bad haircut, you still believe it. St. April could do that for me. And then, you know, like you said, like when you try the deep throat, don't be able to pull it off.

1:08:05 Best Of OK, I should pretend to get them.

1:08:08 Adam Yeah. Yeah.

1:08:10 Drew If this is stirring up that area, you shouldn't be doing that.

1:08:12 Adam And what about the guy getting this?

1:08:14 Carrie stepped a little cockeyed, then?

1:08:19 Adam What about it, Drew?

1:08:21 Drew It doesn't make sense that you'd be with different guys and still getting recurrent strep. You know, it just doesn't fit. You can get chlamydia and gonorrhea of the throat, and that's one of the more commonly increasing categories of STIs right now. So maybe some of it was that, but the whole thing is suspect about it being strep. But if you were getting bacterial infections of the throat recurrently, the tonsils, they need to come out.

1:08:41 Adam All right, but some people generically use strep throat when they have a very bad sore throat.

1:08:47 Drew Yes, and that is wrong. That is a totally different thing, yes.

1:08:50 Adam But if you get reoccurring bad sore throats, don't you have to get your tonsils out?

1:08:54 Drew Not necessarily.

1:08:55 Adam No.

1:08:56 Drew No.

1:08:56 Adam So if I was getting reoccurring bad sore throats.

1:09:01 Drew We'd have to figure that out. Whether it's ulcerating, whether they're viral, whether it's something related to your nose, your post-nasal drip, or what was going on.

1:09:07 Adam But it wouldn't be, let's just take the tonsils out.

1:09:09 Drew No, not necessarily at all.

1:09:10 Adam I sleep with my mouth wide open.

1:09:13 Drew You need all kinds of things fixed up back there. You do.

1:09:15 Adam Wide open.

1:09:16 Drew I know, it must be disgusting.

1:09:19 Adam What I look like is a dead, retarded person when I sleep. I imagine that's what they would look like. Wide open, that's half a pillow shoved in my mouth.

1:09:31 Drew How does your wife sleep in this horrible room with you?

1:09:34 Adam Horrible cotton mouth.

1:09:35 Drew What is that?

1:09:36 Adam Just tongue cleaving to the roof of my mouth. Just get up and just.

1:09:41 Drew You get that thing now where it gets so dry in the back of your throat, it's like you have to cough and it feels horrible.

1:09:47 Adam If something makes contact with it, it will spot weld to it. So then, what I usually do is I go to bed about 2.15, 2.30 and then somewhere about 6.45 I lie there and I think, hmm, now what's making me more uncomfortable? My intense need to urinate or my bone dry desert-like sand ash tray of a mouth? And I lie there and I think, man, and then I think, you know one way I could cure this whole thing and not get up, pee in my mouth. Oh, yes. And then I think, you know, Drew did say urine was sterile and then I think, okay. I just got, and then I, I picture Drew holding a big thumbs, holding a tumbler of frothy urine and a thumbs up right next to it. And that's when I began.

1:10:38 Drew Nice.

1:10:38 Adam That's when I start.

1:10:40 Drew How'd it work? Are you going to try that tonight? No, I wasn't. Yeah, it's good.

1:10:43 Adam Well, I'm here. Like when people give that answer. I'm here. All right, buddy. Let's take a little break.

1:10:50 Drew Yeah, that'd be good.

1:10:51 Adam When we get back, we're going to speak to Elizabeth. She's a virgin. Wants to start having sex with rent with a friend. Can she get boyfriend?

1:11:00 Drew Birth control.

1:11:01 Adam Birth control.

1:11:01 Drew Secretly.

1:11:02 Adam Oh, okay. But see, I can read three or four words, but then I run out of steam.

1:11:06 Drew Yeah, I noticed that.

1:11:08 Adam Bush had that prom yesterday. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

1:11:13 Drew Loveline.

1:11:16 Adam You know, Drew, smelling good is more than a smell. It's an attitude.

1:11:21 Drew That's true, Adam.

1:11:22 Adam It is? How? Break down.

1:11:26 Drew Axe, deodorant, body spray. Can't lose.

1:11:35 Adam Hey, everybody. That's Dr. Drew. We got a Germany or Florida coming up. We got Germany, Florida. We got someone over here is mad at me. And we got this big fat guy, Drew. We'll talk to him in a while.

1:11:49 Drew Yeah.

1:11:50 Adam Let's get rid of the person who's mad at me real fast. Beth?

1:11:53 Best Of Yeah.

1:11:54 Adam Twenty-one.

1:11:56 Best Of I just had to comment more than a question. First of all, I think you guys are totally entertaining, but Adam, I got to ask, why do you talk so much during the whole show?

1:12:04 Adam Well, sometimes I try not to, and then the show seems to drag.

1:12:08 Best Of Well, but the thing is, sometimes you'll get the question out of somebody, and then you go, it's like this super exciting question from somebody you really want to know what the rest of it is, and then you go, hold on a minute.

1:12:19 Adam What show are you listening to? Hold on, a super exciting question from someone you really want to talk to?

1:12:25 Best Of Yeah, like sometimes you'll ask the question, they'll tell their question, they want to know like, you know, help me out, whatever, and then you go, okay, wait, that reminds me, I was driving on Sepulveda today, and you go off on a tangent, and it's just kind of like, well, I want to hear what the guy was going to say.

1:12:40 Adam Well, I want to hear what they're going to say, too, except for the super exciting part. I think that's the part, I think that's the part I have difficulty with in your assertion. Because while I will give you the fact that somebody who, you know, got pregnant at 14 and gave up their son and then was reunited with them at 28, and all that stuff sounds great, when you really hear them say it, but it's rarely delivered in a coherent and exciting fashion. Drew, would you back me up?

1:13:18 Best Of You can't imagine that somebody that's had a tragic life is going to be like, hey, listen to this great story I got, you know?

1:13:27 Adam No, they don't have to be upbeat or peppy about it. They just have to move in a sort of linear fashion and get from point A to point B to point C and not sort of drag, and that's where our callers have difficulty.

1:13:43 Best Of I don't know, but I'm sure you've heard you kind of have one of those voices that sometimes you just kind of like get to the end of it, right?

1:13:50 Caller Have you ever heard that before?

1:13:51 Adam No.

1:13:52 Best Of Yeah?

1:13:53 Adam Not really. Well, look, here's the thing.

1:13:55 Best Of Mom?

1:13:57 Adam Here's the, are you talking about, you're talking about my nasally voice?

1:14:00 Best Of No, but it's funny.

1:14:01 I like it and I appreciate it, but sometimes when you're talking for like an hour.

1:14:06 Adam Yeah. Well, listen, I really, okay, hold on a second, Drew, stop me if I'm wrong. I don't really like talking that much.

1:14:13 Drew That's true.

1:14:14 Adam I really wouldn't. If I thought this show could move along in a cadence that was acceptable, I would gladly hang back. I got ideas, I got stories, I got things I like to say, but I'm perfectly willing to hang back and let things.

1:14:30 Drew Just behave the way you do in real life.

1:14:32 Adam Yeah, I don't talk that much in real life. Look, engineer Chris, what, I said three words to you in the six months I've been here?

1:14:39 Drew Did I talk your ear off? All the time. How about Nicole who broadcasts The Next Studio Down? She thinks you hate her because you've never said one word to her. You pass her every night.

1:14:49 Adam I say something to her.

1:14:50 Drew Yeah, hey. Yeah, hey.

1:14:55 Adam Hello, how's it going? There's nothing wrong with that. I'm not a huge talker, but watch, well, I'll try it. Let's see if we can get someone who's compelling and see what it, see if it does. All right, so I'm willing to try it your way, Beth.

1:15:08 Best Of Well, you don't necessarily have to change it, but just call it an Adam show. Don't call it Loveline anymore.

1:15:11 Adam We'll, we'll, we'll see if we can get people that will put sentences together and provide the kind of entertainment.

1:15:19 Drew You sound like you're, you're the, the, the, the sort of the front person for a group of people who have been sitting around chatting about something.

1:15:26 Wait, what?

1:15:27 Drew You sound like you, you, you're vocalizing something that you've been discussing with somebody else. You know what I mean?

1:15:31 Oh, no, no.

1:15:32 Best Of This isn't just me.

1:15:33 Drew It's just you.

1:15:34 Best Of I'm just driving with my boyfriend and we were listening to it and it was just a random comment I made. So I'm like, Hey, I'll, I'll call him and tell him.

1:15:41 Drew Well, thanks anyway.

1:15:42 Adam All right. Thanks anyway. I just told her I was going to implement her policy.

1:15:48 Drew She wants you to continue doing it, but change the name of the show to the Adam show. See, that was her, that was her suggestion.

1:15:57 Adam Look, look, hold on a second. Whatever it is I do on the show, it's not going to please everybody. I'm well aware of that. And here's the good news. I don't care. I really don't. I don't see any email. I don't talk to anybody. I don't think anyone listens to this show. And I really, Drew, I don't know how many discussions we've had about this show outside of this show, but, but have you ever heard me say, gee, I wonder what people thought about this or I'm concerned about that, or I need to start doing this or that?

1:16:25 Drew Never.

1:16:27 Adam Be honest.

1:16:28 Drew Never.

1:16:28 Adam Okay. I, when the show's over, what do I talk about?

1:16:31 Drew Your house, your mom and your grandmother.

1:16:34 Adam Thank you.

1:16:35 Drew And sometimes your dad.

1:16:36 Adam Which is not to say I don't care about the show. I just do it the best I can and then that's it. That's it.

1:16:40 Drew And sometimes people's driving. All right.

1:16:42 Adam You ever see me look at an email, read a letter?

1:16:45 Drew Never.

1:16:46 Adam Ever?

1:16:49 Drew Occasionally, and we'll put a couple down here, I'll go, hey, look at this, and you won't.

1:16:53 Adam There you go. All right. So in nine years, how many emails do you think I've looked at?

1:16:57 Drew Maybe one.

1:16:58 Adam Letters read?

1:16:59 Drew Zero.

1:17:00 Adam Thank you.

1:17:01 Drew All right.

1:17:02 Adam Sean?

1:17:04 Hey, what's going on?

1:17:05 Adam You're 17. What's the problem?

1:17:08 Caller Well, before I get to my question, I just wanted to say, Adam, you are freaking hilarious and that girl needs to shut her mouth.

1:17:13 Adam Thanks, baby doll. But I'm going to try a sort of a laissez-faire approach to this call.

1:17:18 Drew A Beth approach.

1:17:19 Caller Well, I don't know. Like, I don't know if you remember this, but a while back you were goofing on some PSAs and the one where they're singing Amazing Grace. I think Dag was in on the show and you guys were just rolling on the floor. I was dying. You guys were goofing on kids getting shot and singing.

1:17:39 Drew Right, right, right. What's your question tonight?

1:17:43 Caller I'm like severely overweight and like I've done tons of diets and I just can't, I can't get...

1:17:49 Drew What are you coming in at?

1:17:52 Caller 6'1 and like just under like 350. I think I'm like 341.

1:17:56 Drew What's the lowest weight you've gotten to?

1:17:58 Caller Huh?

1:17:59 Drew What's the lowest weight you've gotten to?

1:18:01 Caller I did the Atkins and I got down to like 270 and then I came off of it and I just rebounded severely.

1:18:12 Adam Are your parents big?

1:18:14 Caller My mom is. My dad's a toothpick but he's not around.

1:18:19 Adam Oh, he's split?

1:18:21 Caller Huh?

1:18:22 Adam Is he black?

1:18:24 Caller Am I?

1:18:25 Adam Your dad?

1:18:26 Caller No.

1:18:27 Adam Okay. And Drew wrote something down and handed it to you. And he's split? Yeah. Is it because your mom ballooned up and he's a toothpick or? Yeah.

1:18:37 Caller Well, she's been big like ever since I can remember.

1:18:42 Adam Well, look, any guy who's 17 and 350 pounds has a genetic predisposition to weight gain.

1:18:48 Drew For the most part. And, uh...

1:18:50 Adam No, no. Now, you know what? Straight, straight on.

1:18:53 Drew Well, or there's abuse survivors that will do this sometimes, but, uh...

1:18:57 Caller Uh-oh.

1:18:58 Drew Yeah?

1:19:00 Caller You don't know what? I, I've been, like, trying this, this diet, like, where, um, I've been taking that hydroxy cut stuff.

1:19:07 Drew Yeah.

1:19:07 Caller And, like, I wake up in the morning and, uh, I'll drink a V8 and I'll take a couple hydroxy cuts and then, um, in the afternoon I'll eat, like, a very small lunch and take a couple more and I drink, like, a ton of water.

1:19:20 Adam What's a hydroxy cut?

1:19:22 Caller Yeah. It's like...

1:19:24 Adam What is it?

1:19:29 Caller It's like a metabolism boost, appetite present.

1:19:32 Drew Yeah, but there are things like ephedra out there that are not so great for you. But listen, the fact... have you worked with a dietician?

1:19:39 Caller Um, yeah, and, like, they gave me, like, a diet that was, like, almost impossible to follow.

1:19:46 Drew Alright, and have you tried exercising?

1:19:48 Caller Yeah, I do, like, a cardio workout.

1:19:51 Drew Alright, here's the deal. Alright, so Sean, if you've worked with a dietician, if you've diligently applied yourself and you're exercising and you still can't lose weight, that is the time to really look into obesity surgery, bariatric surgeries. There are procedures that can be done now that are very effective, that are done through a scope, they don't even have to open you up necessarily. That is designed for people like you. There are people... it's pretty clear now, the people that are in the sort of weight range you're talking about and people that have what Adam is calling genetic predisposition, something has to be done to reverse that genetic potentiality in that surgery. And that's the only thing that has sustained weight loss associated with it.

1:20:27 Adam Well, there you go, Beth. That was my semi-hands-off approach to call it. I'm done with that. Let me ask you this, Drew. Is there always been a certain percentage of society that was obese? Yes. I mean, I don't know how you could tell. I guess, you know, you see portraits and things like that from, you know, days of Yorn. If you were fat, you know, if you're Henry VIII, they would probably even trim you up a little.

1:20:58 Drew I mean, no, in the old days, obesity was considered a sign of success.

1:21:04 Adam Well, yeah, but that was being sort of filled out.

1:21:10 Drew Was obesity absolutely the guy that Mr. Pickwick in some of the Charles Dickens, I think it was Charles Dickens' tale, but the guy was hugely obese and he was sort of looked at as the as the corpulent, successful, you know, wealthy guy.

1:21:24 Adam Well, there was never the large ass popper. I mean, it was always the successful head, you know, sort of captain of industry guy that was big and fat.

1:21:32 Drew Big women were considered sort of desirable too.

1:21:34 Adam Yeah. Bad times back then. And here's and by the way, big gal, you mix that with no showers and you got a little trouble downstairs. You know what I'm saying?

1:21:47 Drew I'm listening.

1:21:48 Adam Yeah. Yeah. They know, by the way, no waxing, no showers and 250 pounds, fellas. Yeah.

1:21:57 Drew Good times.

1:21:58 Adam You got to put some spices on that hammer so don't go bad. You know what I mean?

1:22:04 Drew Well, most days it wasn't oral sex considered a sin or something.

1:22:07 Adam I sure hope it was. I would have been leading that crusade if they weren't. But here's the thing. There's always there's when you're fat and I mean that fat at 17, that is the way you are and it doesn't do society any good. Really. There's two things society wants to do when you're fat. They want to A, make fun of you.

1:22:27 Drew Make it your problem.

1:22:29 Adam B, make fun of you. Actually, A through like G, make fun of you. And then a G through Z, sell you stuff. Whether they be ideas, books, protein shakes. Try to get so society. It's really there's no interest for society to say, look, that's just the way you are. It's a genetic thing. That's the way you're cut. It's you know, it's like attacking somebody who has a big nose or male pattern baldness and stuff.

1:22:56 Caller And we still do that.

1:22:58 Adam Even realizing that there's nothing they can do about it. But really fat people. And I do believe that they are getting the brunt of all the political correctness that is going on in this society.

1:23:10 Drew All the political correctness gets converted over to ostracism.

1:23:15 Adam Here's the deal, there's no more Polak jokes. Now there's fat jokes. And there's no more black jokes. There's no more Mexican jokes. God knows the people are still funny. There's no more good Asian jokes. There's no more good, we cannot make fun of people anymore, you know, religion-wise or ethnicity-wise. So the one, the last bastion of attack, the last target for our arrows are fat people.

1:23:41 Drew And they're gonna take it all.

1:23:42 Adam And if you watch television or listen to the radio, whatever, that's fine. I mean, that's where they go. I mean, if you substitute fat guy for black guy or fat guy for Jewish guy or fat guy for Asian guy or whatever it is, and you take those same barbs and steer it toward those people, there would be, it would be outrage. I mean, the station would be flooded with letters. No, you know, Jimmy Kimmel couldn't do his late night show and make fun of Star Jones being black. He could make fun of Star Jones being fat. See what I'm saying? And I'm not saying she deserves to be made fun of because she's black, but the idea that it's okay to make fun of her because she's fat, somehow that's okay. And the only way that can remain okay is if we decide to brought it on themselves. Essentially, because then it makes it easier. Oh, look at you, you slob, have some respect.

1:24:36 Drew Stop eating those McDonald's. Stop the fast food. If you just cut out the fast food, you'd be fine. If you cut out the fast food, you hear all this chivalrous out there. If you cut this out, if you cut that out.

1:24:44 Adam It's more like have some discipline, have some self-respect, have some dignity. Look, super skinny guys, by the way. The super skinny guys do anything to say super skinny unless they're doing mounds of heroin. I mean, think about the guys, you know, that are sort of wiry. Look at Dr. Bruce. Dr. Bruce makes a Ichabod Crane-

1:25:05 Drew Look fat.

1:25:06 Adam Look like Veruca salt. Is that the fat one?

1:25:11 Drew Augustus glue.

1:25:11 Adam Augustus glue. I mean, he is, he has his Adam's apple as Adam's apple. I mean, this guy, I swear to Christ, he is a bean pole Dr. Bruce. Now, Dr. Bruce is the only adult male I know who takes 16 sugars in his coffee. Not three, 16. Okay?

1:25:36 Drew And we put whipped cream on it if we had it.

1:25:38 Adam Yes, absolutely. Now, he eats like an idiot. I mean, he eats like a stoned five-year-old. Do you understand?

1:25:48 Drew Yeah, and he's a bean pole.

1:25:50 Adam And he's a bean pole. Do we need to know what his secret is?

1:25:53 Drew Well, maybe you ought to suggest to him you put out some videos.

1:25:56 Adam Yeah, he needs to come out with a book.

1:25:57 Drew Book, videos.

1:25:58 Adam It's called Under 20 Packets in Your Coffee. You make that-

1:26:03 Drew Well, then you get the fat guy. You get Phil telling other people how to be thin.

1:26:06 Adam Dr. Phil?

1:26:07 Drew Yeah.

1:26:07 Adam Oh yeah.

1:26:08 Drew Yeah, well, he's thin.

1:26:09 Adam Well, he knows. And now look, here's the thing, everybody. Okay, stop eating so much. Start exercising a lot. Obviously, you're gonna move in the right direction. You ain't never gonna be Dr. Beanpole. You're just not. And like I said, if you got his metabolism, you can be a 45-year-old man who puts 16 packets of sugar in his coffee. That's it. Okay, thank you very much. Let's take ourselves a little break. We'll be right back.

1:26:46 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191. The Love Line will be right back.

1:26:49 Caller Now you and your guests can enjoy three nights at Chicago's House of Blues.

1:26:53 Caller Experience the series of amazing live concerts.

1:26:56 Adam And we'll get you there. And that's Dr. Paintball. Drew played some paintball today in the adrenaline, still coursing through his veins.

1:27:24 Drew Yeah, it was a good time.

1:27:25 Adam It's exciting.

1:27:26 Drew Yeah.

1:27:27 Adam Yeah, it's fun. People need a little of that. Yeah?

1:27:31 Drew Yeah.

1:27:32 Adam Yeah, right, I told you, I told you.

1:27:34 Drew Yeah, I know, I know. Why are you up to me, can't ride with it? I said this is good, I'm going.

1:27:39 Adam I think that'll be one of my things. When I'm on my deathbed, I'll think, I should have done more stretching. And I should have played more paintball.

1:27:46 Drew Ha ha ha ha.

1:27:48 Adam Cause, paintball's great, it's a blast, it's fun. You know, and I got some money, I got some friends. We should go play.

1:27:55 Drew The guy's really into it.

1:27:56 Adam Be real?

1:27:57 Drew Right?

1:27:58 Adam Yeah.

1:27:58 Drew He's way into it, he just plays in teams and competitions and stuff.

1:28:01 Adam Yeah, yeah, all right. We'll call it be real, don't want to go paintballing.

1:28:07 Drew He asked us last time he was up here.

1:28:08 Adam I know, but you know, it's so ambitious, you know.

1:28:12 Drew Like I said, on your deathbed.

1:28:13 Adam Yeah.

1:28:14 Drew Yeah.

1:28:14 Adam Jim?

1:28:16 Yeah?

1:28:16 Adam You're 20?

1:28:18 Caller Yup.

1:28:19 Adam What's your question?

1:28:21 Caller My girlfriend, I think she has more of like a sexual drive when she's off of birth control.

1:28:27 Drew That can happen.

1:28:29 Caller Really?

1:28:30 Drew Yeah, some women depending on which pill they're taking, and for each woman it's different. Some women their sex drive is suppressed by the progesterone, in fact, most often that's the case. Others, it's enhanced by that. Same is true of the estrogens. For some, the estrogen suppresses it, some it enhances it. And some are neutral. Each woman is different how they respond to these hormones. You have to kind of find how they respond to them and what they can tolerate.

1:28:53 Adam Okay.

1:28:54 Drew And you know, maybe there's other symptoms too that she starts to become aware of when she comes off them. Like maybe she feels a little less, more tired or a little more depressed. So it's something to keep an eye on.

1:29:04 Adam Mm-hmm, let's talk to Amber, who's 23. Amber? Good, how are you doing?

1:29:11 Caller I'm doing well, thanks. I just wanted to say Dr. Drew, I love you. I think you're one of the sexiest women in America.

1:29:18 Drew Oh my God, Amber, call back again.

1:29:24 Adam You told her to call back.

1:29:25 Drew Oh, you're an idiot.

1:29:26 Adam Yeah, that's just a call back.

1:29:28 Drew Come on.

1:29:29 Adam All right, all right Amber, let's go. Come on, babe.

1:29:33 Caller I was wondering if you can use olive oil as a lubricant or if that will upset your natural flora. If that'll like irritate the skin at all.

1:29:44 Adam First off, if you used anything that said extra virgin on you, it would probably burst into flames when it hits your vagina.

1:29:50 Drew No, Adam, be serious. No, it would form little drops that go, I can run away.

1:29:56 Adam Yeah, who is this, Mama Celeste? Do you remember, I dated myself with a frozen pizza.

1:30:06 Drew Oh my God.

1:30:06 Adam Do they have Celeste, Mama Celeste?

1:30:08 Caller Is she not around anymore?

1:30:10 Adam Anne says yes. Chris, what the hell? Your mom does all the shopping.

1:30:13 Drew She does all the home cooking. She's the Italian, right?

1:30:15 Adam Yeah, mom's Italian.

1:30:17 Drew Don't get that question. It is Mama Celeste.

1:30:18 Adam Quite down over there. Shut your own mouth.

1:30:20 Drew Amber, anything can upset the natural floor in there. You've heard us talk about before. And olive oil is not sort of one of the recommended lubricants. They're water-based, very inert lubricants out there. Well, is that inert stuff?

1:30:32 Adam What's the definition of inert? Nothing.

1:30:36 Drew It doesn't interact chemically with anything.

1:30:38 Adam Yeah, so it's like, I guess to me, I think as a lay person, I think of organic, is inert the opposite of organic? And if you took an inert material and just sort of left it out, it would just sort of go away, but there wouldn't be fungus growing on it, right?

1:30:57 Drew No, inert, nothing would happen.

1:30:59 Adam Nothing would happen.

1:31:00 Drew Yeah, it's inert. It's had no inertia. No, that's what I'm saying.

1:31:03 Adam Nothing.

1:31:04 Drew Nothing, it wouldn't go away, just nothing.

1:31:06 Adam Well, I'm saying eventually-

1:31:07 Drew Something could happen. Yeah, it could evaporate or something.

1:31:09 Adam Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

1:31:10 Drew Yeah, right. It wouldn't transform into something else. It wouldn't interact with anything.

1:31:14 Adam Right, take a piece of bread out and eventually it starts growing moss and stuff on it.

1:31:18 Drew Yeah.

1:31:18 Adam All right, so listen, Amber, how about you just spring for some nice-

1:31:25 Drew K-Y, yeah.

1:31:26 Caller The problem is, is when we didn't have any in the house, so I was trying to think what we could use.

1:31:32 Drew Ah, desperation.

1:31:33 Adam Olive oil would be somewhere near the top of my-

1:31:37 Drew List of maybes?

1:31:39 Adam Yeah, I mean, you start thinking Vaseline and then you start thinking 30-weight.

1:31:43 Drew Why do you need lubricant that badly? What are they doing? What are you doing that you need lubricant that badly?

1:31:51 Caller Well, it's just we had like a strawberry condom and I sucked off all of the lubricant that was on it and we didn't want to like stop and go to the store and pick up some KY in the middle of it.

1:32:03 Adam Amber's a keeper. Suck the lubricant right off the flavored condom. Still good to go. Out of lube. Let's hit the pantry and see what we can find.

1:32:15 Drew Wow, Amber.

1:32:18 Adam That's a gamer.

1:32:20 Drew Yeah, I wouldn't be into using a olive oil with a condom.

1:32:23 Adam She's what we call a cracker jack.

1:32:25 Drew Is that right?

1:32:26 Adam Yeah, that's what you call a cracker jack. She's good to go. She's like a MacGyver with a vagina. Kimberly? You're 20?

1:32:39 Caller This is actually for Dr. Drew.

1:32:41 Drew Yeah.

1:32:41 Caller Almost a month ago, I went to the bathroom and there was sort of bloody discharge. So I waited a couple of days and I called.

1:32:51 Drew What, blood discharge from your vagina?

1:32:53 Caller Yeah.

1:32:54 Drew It wasn't mid-cycle bleeding?

1:32:56 Caller Actually, I haven't gotten my period since February.

1:32:59 Drew How can you tell a bloody discharge from just bleeding?

1:33:04 Caller Well, because it wasn't a lot.

1:33:08 Drew No, Kimberly, that's just bleeding. That's just your cycle.

1:33:10 Adam Where did your period go?

1:33:12 Caller I have no idea.

1:33:14 Drew You need to get this more thoroughly evaluated. That may have just been a light period. You may not be ovulating. You may have... There's a lot of things to this. This needs to be sort of sorted out.

1:33:23 Caller I did call the doctor and they're like, don't worry about it. If it gets worse, call a spec.

1:33:28 Drew No, you shouldn't worry about it. It's a very common condition. You're having very irregular periods. But you need to know why. I think you had regular periods in the past. You need to figure this out. It's a pretty simple work up. So go to your doctor to check that out. Don't worry.

1:33:45 Adam But good times.

1:33:46 Drew Good times.

1:33:47 Adam All right. We're going to take a little break. When we come back, we'll come back with more of the show. Yes?

1:33:53 Caller Yeah.

1:33:54 Adam After this.

1:33:54 Caller Okay, so I know there's nothing wrong with me. So what's up?

1:34:01 Caller But I tried everything else and thought, what the hell?

1:34:09 Caller 877-889-DATE.

1:34:38 Adam Well there you go. Two fabulous hours of the best of Love Line. So, until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying, Mahalo.

1:34:52 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Sunday, July 4, 2004