Episode 1000579934269

0:55 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually oriented content.

1:03 Voiceover The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191. He is Adam Corolla. He is having a flat tire, or we don't even know what he's having, actually, but he's having car problems.

1:14 Guest Some sort of car trouble, yeah.

1:16 Adam And that voice is David Buckner from Papa Roach. They're playing at the sixth annual Smokeout this weekend, Saturday, at the National Orange Show Fairgrounds. Thanks for coming in.

1:25 Guest Thank you.

1:26 Adam It's good to be here. Brought a guest?

1:27 Guest Yeah, I brought my wife, actually.

1:29 Adam Mia Tyler.

1:29 Guest Hello.

1:31 Adam And how would... You guys are legendary radio personalities, obviously. Sorry. Mia, how would people know you, Mia?

1:41 Guest I'm a model, and my dad is Steven Tyler.

1:44 Adam Right. And weren't you with something recently important, modeling-wise?

1:47 Did you get a award or something?

1:49 Adam You've just been very visible.

1:51 Just visible.

1:52 Guest I do plus-size stuff, so.

1:54 Adam And that's getting a lot of press and stuff these days.

1:56 Guest I'm a good role model.

1:58 Adam And you were telling me about that last time you were on the radio on this kind of program. Some of your role-modeling behaviors sort of came through on the air. Maybe we shouldn't talk about those this time.

2:09 Guest If you'd like to.

2:09 Adam I don't care.

2:10 Guest That's me rebellious behavior.

2:11 Adam Rebellious behavior. So you guys, as I said, I want to go right to the phones. Again, the phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. I won't trouble people with the drone of my voice, as Adam might. I know he's listening right now and cringing with every moment that he's not here. Let's go to this one call I told you guys about before we got on the air. His name is Andrew19. Hey, what's going on?

2:33 Caller How are you doing?

2:34 Adam Good. You're on Loveline.

2:36 Caller Well, I'm calling because I have some problem with my foreskin. I really don't know what the deal is, what they put for the past two days. It's been really swollen and you can feel inside of there, like in the tip of the foreskin, there's like bumps going on, like bumps inside there. Like it's like something.

2:58 Adam New partner?

2:59 Caller Huh?

3:00 Adam New partner, old partner. No, I'm not. Someone new you've been with? You're what?

3:05 Caller I never had sex.

3:08 Adam Wow, that's great.

3:09 Caller Yeah.

3:09 Adam Hold on a second, Andrew.

3:11 Drew I'm only two minutes and six seconds late.

3:13 Adam That's amazing. We thought you'd be like 20 minutes late.

3:16 Drew Yeah, well, see?

3:16 Adam How do you have car trouble and make it on time?

3:19 Drew Well, first off, let me say this about the low gas meter thing in the car. Useless.

3:28 Adam The little light that goes on?

3:30 Drew No, it's not the light. It's now the thing that tells you how many miles you've got left to drive. You pull out of your garage, you've got 53 miles. You get down to the end of your street, down 11 miles. What the hell's going on with that?

3:43 Adam I think every time you take a corner, the gas slashes up on the monitor and adds another 20 miles.

3:48 Drew Just feel free to compensate for this is all I'm saying. The Japs can't figure that one out?

3:55 Adam We have some guests here tonight.

3:56 Drew Do you guys have any trouble getting here?

3:58 Guest Actually, no. We found it just we put it in the navigation system in the car and we got right here.

4:04 Drew I got the low tire thing going. I had to go back to the house after I got about halfway and put air in my tire.

4:09 Adam What?

4:10 Drew I got about a third of the way here.

4:11 Adam How do you do that at your house?

4:12 Drew I got air. I got a 30 gallon air compressor in my garage, puss out. I don't know what you got over there. You got nothing. You got a zipper scooter and an extra tampon. No, I got it going on, but here's the thing. I thought I was driving on the way I was driving here and the other thing went off. The other light went off. Uh-oh, low tire pressure, I'll just stop at one of my friendly neighborhood Southern California gas stations and then I close my eyes and I fast forward to the steely eye look of the angry foreigner who was going, no, I cannot, no, I was like yelling at me about no air and I thought, no, I'll just go home. You think you could take a leak or get some air, get some water, some directions at a gas station in Southern California in 2003? Would that be possible?

5:00 Caller No. No.

5:02 Drew That's right. Hi, how are you doing? Hey, David. How have you been, man? I'm good. I'm sorry. I'm a little hurried tonight. But Drew did a hell of an interview. I heard the last ten seconds of it is I was... We'll get into some good stuff, but don't worry. All right. So... Let's get back on the floor. I'm sorry I'm late. Yeah, we've got to help the kids.

5:25 Adam Andrew's foreskin is what we're talking about.

5:26 Drew All right. Andrew?

5:28 Adam It's red and bumpy and painful and swollen, right?

5:31 Caller Not all that, but...

5:33 Adam You didn't say all that.

5:34 Caller It's just swollen, and there's some bumps in it. Like I'm thinking it's a vein in there, something that's... I don't know.

5:42 Adam Andrew, I don't think you should be trying to figure it out yourself. Have you been playing with a vacuum or anything like that, or...? You're not sexually active. You're not sexually active. You're not sexually active. Is it, is the head of the penis emerge from the foreskin? Are you able to push it out of? Yeah, that's not a problem.

6:04 Caller But it's just like... I wouldn't worry about it.

6:06 Drew That's not what you want to worry about, but... It's tough when you have damage to the penis and you're not sexually active. That's like when the car gets dinged on the boat ride over from Germany.

6:16 Adam It speaks volumes about it.

6:35 Guest Maybe it's because he's not using it.

6:37 Drew Maybe he's using it.

6:37 Guest Maybe you need to use lube.

6:39 Drew No, no. This happened to me. You're not using PRL, are you? For lube? No.

6:44 Guest Or conditioner or something?

6:45 Drew Okay, just playing a hunch.

6:47 Caller Let me tell you the rest. I haven't got everything yet. Just like everybody else.

6:52 Guest Yeah.

6:53 Caller So, it was what, like two weeks ago, I was messing around with my girlfriend and I still have my pants on and everything. We were just whatever. You want to call it dry humping, if you will. That a good word for it.

7:10 Guest Come on.

7:11 Caller So, anyways, it came up bleeding, like it got cut, somehow it got cut on the tip and also like along the foreskin too. And it bled for, it bled quite a bit and it stopped bleeding after about a day or so.

7:27 Adam You might want to include us into this part of the story at the beginning.

7:30 Caller Yeah, I'm trying to get to you.

7:32 Adam Traumatized and now it's healing. That's it.

7:34 Drew I'm this close to doing not only the one finger hang up but the full hand mash. You ready, Drew? Jackass.

7:42 Guest I think he's trying to build the suspense, you know.

7:44 Drew Good, idiot. Good luck, you dicks. Don't call this show and make us play 20 questions with your dork. And then go, oh, uh, FYI. I got a little chainsaw accident. Idiots.

7:58 Shut up.

8:00 Drew I hope this guy's a virgin for another hundred years. Jack off. There's nothing worse, you stupid night here. Oh, second part of the story.

8:08 Shut up.

8:09 Drew This guy got his dick caught in a zipper. That's what he has to say. Idiot. Don't call the show anymore, you jack off. I'll see you in junior college. There's nothing worse than a snotty teenager. I mean, they're all snotty, but the ones that call this show are like super extra snot filled. Nothing worse.

8:29 Adam Mia was telling me she was on LovePhones when she was 16.

8:32 Drew Oh, really? Got in trouble.

8:34 Adam The host there got a 60-year-old to talk explicitly about things she was doing and stuff. It's like a good time.

8:39 Drew How dare they? Where's that show now? What's going on with LovePhones?

8:44 Adam Let me think.

8:45 Guest I'm not sure.

8:47 Drew Let me say this real quick.

8:49 Guest What?

8:50 Drew How long ago was that?

8:51 Guest When I was 16?

8:52 Drew Yeah.

8:52 Guest Well, I'll be 25 next month.

8:54 Drew All right, so that was 28 years. Nine years.

8:57 Adam Nine years ago. In the meantime, what is that about this show?

8:59 Drew Huh? No, no, I was going to say, I don't know if LovePhones is still on the air. No. Is it not on the air?

9:07 Adam It's long gone.

9:08 Drew Let me just take one quick second and say something to everybody just very quickly. Very quickly. You know, when we did the Man Show, it was always like, when we first did the Man Show, it was always like, what about the X Show? Aren't you guys just copying the X Show? I enjoyed it. You're about to write it. Kiss my ass. X Show's long gone. And when we first started doing this show, it was always like, what about LovePhones?

9:30 Guest How about LovePhones?

9:31 Drew Aren't you guys just... Kiss my ass again, you retards. They're all gone. Of course they're gone. They suck. I just want to smack all those people that... That's all we did. What about the LovePhones? We used to syndicate when the show... Well, it's still syndicated, obviously. But when it's first getting syndicated, it was always like, well, why aren't we syndicated in Chicago? They got LovePhones there. Idiots. All that junk. And here's the problem with all this junk that clutters the world. Your junk is just as bad as their junk in the minds of everyone else. They don't know. Aren't you guys like LovePhones? Idiots. They're gone. Long gone, right?

10:12 Adam Long gone.

10:12 Drew That's right. So they made you say things you don't want to say?

10:15 Guest No. She just had me talk about like...

10:18 Adam Adults shouldn't be doing with a 16-year-old.

10:19 Guest Things that 16-year-olds shouldn't be talking about.

10:22 Drew Was that like Judge Judy? Who was that? Where is she? In some kind of loony bin or something? What happened to those people? Jesus Christ. Could you imagine we always have to defend ourselves? You guys like lumping?

10:40 What about the Act Show?

10:42 Drew Idiots. To deal with this. Flat tires, love phones, Act Show. What about the Act Show?

10:50 Guest I don't even know the Act Show.

10:51 Drew That's my point. It's been gone for like five years. It was a piece of flaming ass that came out. FX wanted to buy The Man Show before we came out The Man Show. We told them, no, we're going to Comedy Central. So they came out with their own version of The Man Show ten minutes before we came out. Then everyone was like, aren't you guys just really good?

11:12 Adam Pop Roach planted the big sixth annual smokeout this weekend. 50,000 people plus.

11:18 Drew Fairgrounds, Orange Fairgrounds.

11:19 Adam Cypress Hill, third from the end.

11:21 Guest So the venue did get changed then, right? Was it like the San Bernardino or something?

11:26 Drew Well, it does get moved around.

11:29 Guest They just tell me when it will roll out of bed.

11:32 Adam We're the same way.

11:33 Drew Well, we didn't have it. It wasn't on the paper last night, but we did figure out.

11:37 Adam Yeah, they said it.

11:38 Drew We did figure out from Be Real eventually that... And by the way, Bobo and Sendog, not the brains behind the smokeout, I think. I was like, because before Be Real got here, I was like, so what happens if you guys run over time? I mean, a lot of money, a lot of union guys, a lot of penalties, stuff like that. And they're like, yeah, yeah, I don't know.

12:02 Adam Well, they were like, well, when you run over, it means you go past the time you're allowed.

12:07 Drew Yeah, I know. I know it's like a thousand bucks a minute with all those union guys and everything. And then they were like...

12:13 Guest And that gets expensive.

12:14 Caller Yeah.

12:15 Guest We've had that happen a couple of times.

12:16 Drew You have?

12:17 Guest Yeah, and just like little club shows and it's just like huge money.

12:20 Caller I know.

12:20 Guest These union guys, you know.

12:21 Drew Imagine in a massive venue like that, you're supposed to knock off at 12 and you go 45 minutes overtime. You have a 300, you know, security, everybody.

12:30 Adam But be real, they're pretty good to them for like 10, 15 minutes.

12:33 Drew Then they pull the plug.

12:35 Guest So wait, where is it at again now?

12:37 Drew It's at the National Orange Show Fairgrounds.

12:42 Guest OK. Because I could just see like our trucks rolling up to the wrong venue and like we roll up. We're like, all right, ready to go on stage, dude, we're going to rock. And there's like on there.

12:50 Drew Crickets.

12:52 Guest Spinal tap totally.

12:53 Adam Cherries 19.

12:54 Drew Hold on. Is it really the National Orange Show Fairgrounds? And doesn't that seem like you just took a bunch of words and put them in a jar and you shook them up and spilled them out like Yahtzee?

13:03 Adam There's a National Orange Show.

13:05 Drew There is?

13:05 Adam The show for oranges. I don't think it's in like Orange. I think it's the Orange Show.

13:10 Drew But the venue is the National Orange Show Fairgrounds.

13:13 Adam That's what they say. They said last night, Chris seems to know this.

13:15 Drew Alright, it is. Here's the beauty of what's written on these things.

13:19 Adam No more information.

13:20 Drew Well, no. I've learned not to trust it completely. Call me skeptical. Carrie?

13:27 Adam Carrie 19, Caller Who Goes By Carrie.

13:30 Drew What's happening?

13:32 I can't believe.

13:35 Drew Yeah. I love phones.

13:42 I've kind of had a problem for some time now for the past few months. I've kind of been having this discharge and I'm just wondering like what that could be from. There's no irritation or anything.

13:53 Adam What's discharging? What is discharging?

13:56 Well, it's because...

13:57 Adam Your breast, your vagina, your nose.

13:59 Drew It's always a vagina until proven otherwise.

14:02 Adam People say discharge. I think milky discharge. I think breast.

14:05 Drew You have to say milky.

14:07 Adam Yeah. It's on the board there is milky.

14:08 Drew Oh, it is? See, that's what you get for reading.

14:10 Adam I know. It's a mistake. But Carrie, are you sexually active?

14:16 Not lately. It happened. It started happening a couple of weeks before I lost my virginity, so I don't really think it's sexually related. Before? Yeah, before.

14:22 Adam How long have you had it for? That may just be normal. Has it come and get heavier around the time of your period?

14:32 I used to have that before, but now it's just like every day.

14:36 Adam Every day.

14:36 Guest But isn't that a normal thing?

14:37 Adam It is a normal thing.

14:38 Guest Isn't that why they have those like commercials for those pads on TV?

14:43 Adam Yeah, absolutely. And there are abnormal discharges. There can be something called Leukorrhea with emphatic come out there, and there can be infectious discharges. But if you're sexually active, you should be getting pelvic exams regularly. They can tell you whether it's infection or normal, and it's a pretty simple matter.

14:57 Drew I saw one of those ads where they actually used red dye. Not dye, but it was like an illustrated thing, and the stuff was colored red. It wasn't shooting out of a vagina, but I mean, normally it's blue dye for what the pads and stuff. It's always this sort of weird blue.

15:15 Adam Oh, no, there's a red one. No, on these like hip cartoon.

15:20 Drew Yeah.

15:20 Adam Yeah.

15:22 Drew How do you know about the hip cartoon pad commercial?

15:24 Adam Because my kids watch it and then they go, oh, those come on.

15:27 Guest So I don't have those on TV.

15:29 Drew Yeah.

15:30 Adam Natural. What are you going to do?

15:31 Guest They don't have like jock itch commercials.

15:35 Drew They don't have jock strap commercial. Yeah, they got jock itch commercials.

15:40 Adam Yeah, they do.

15:41 Drew It's mostly it's mostly athlete's foot stuff. I've had an asshole that kind of stuff my own self. I've had an asshole of guys that noshing out on earthworms and oh, yeah, people vomiting. By the way, who decided it was OK to watch people heave on TV like on Survivor? Just, you know, the woman, I mean, three or three, three episodes ago on Survivor after they're reading a bunch of these blood clams and, you know, rancid sea anemones and stuff. The chicks down on all fours bent over a log. She's heaving. It's coming out of her nose and stuff. And the cameraman, you can see when they're sort of hustling around to get the to get the angle. And I'm thinking, it's it's eight, ten in the evening. And this is this is network, baby.

16:29 Adam And they're out in the middle of nowhere. It's not without. These are biological entities. These these humanoids.

16:35 Drew Yes.

16:36 Adam Go down. That's going to happen.

16:38 Drew I don't care if they die. Just don't want to ruin my dinner. I don't want to watch them heave. But let me say this. Let me tell you the kind of society we're living in. First off, we're living in a kind of society that does not recognize the difference between love phones and love life. That's the first thing in the man show and the act show. But, you know, here's the democratic.

16:55 Adam I told you.

16:55 Drew Let's talk about Survivor for a second. Survivor, on the same episode, had a chick taking a shower out in the... Her reward, the reward was you got the shower. Survivor is a great show, by the way. It's very good. But she's taking a shower. She's taking a shower and they're filming her from a distance. Obviously, she's nude and they're filming her from behind. And there's a sort of strategically placed wicker basket that blocks her ass. And that's about all you can... You know, her back is acceptable and the bottom of her legs are acceptable. But there's this wicker basket. But at some point, her ass crack peeks through the wicker basket and they have to put a quarter size tile on it. They tile it out. I mean, they do that fuzz out TV thing because three quarters of an inch of the middle part of her crack poked in this gap between the wicker basket that you could see from a hundred yards away. And they had to tile that out. Ten minutes later, the chicks blow a chow all over the beach and they got a camera mounted on a helmet that's like going down her throat so we can get a better shot of it. And I ask you, really? What about the atheists of the world? Can't see a little ass crack, but the reconstituted blood clam shooting out of this broad's nostril, no problem while I'm trying to eat. Really? That's it? That's society? That's the one we've created?

18:17 Guest That's where we are.

18:18 Drew That's where we are.

18:19 Guest That's it.

18:19 Caller This is it. This is it.

18:22 Drew It's not still illegal?

18:23 Guest It's as good as it gets right here.

18:24 Drew Joe Rogan is yelling at people to eat cow semen that's, you know, lamb balls have been soaked in cow semen, but I can't see a little areola peeking out the side of a bikini. That's it?

18:38 Adam That's it.

18:39 Drew Holy Christ. What is going on?

18:41 Guest You know, somebody might get turned on or something by nipple or butt cracker, so you can't have that on TV.

18:47 Adam Well, look at a woman. It might be exploitative.

18:52 Drew What about the they're eating?

18:55 Guest But it's puke, man.

18:57 Drew I'm telling you on on fear factor, they're eating penis. They're eating the penis of animals. They're eating the penis and I can't see a little ass crack. What the hell is going on? Do we ever what's going on? Is this some big joke that's being played on me?

19:15 Guest I think we're all getting punk. That's what it is.

19:18 Drew Is that what it is?

19:19 Guest The whole nation is just getting punk.

19:21 Drew I'll tell you the part about it that's most alarming is when I scream this at people, they go, well, what are you going to do? I go, you don't notice this? That's life. I think we're all beaten down by the man. Yeah. That's what it is. Lucas. Oh, and by the way, let me tell you this. Why do you take mushrooms and think about this kind of stuff? Your head will blow up. It'll blow up. I've been there. You just take mushrooms and start thinking about we're watching them eat a raccoon penis at eight o'clock, but at eleven o'clock, I can't see a little ass crack. Your head will explode. They'll explode like that movie Scanner's Drew. Lucas.

20:00 Adam That's a modern day reference.

20:03 Drew I don't know any other movies where the guys' heads blew up, scanners. That was it.

20:08 Adam Austin Powers.

20:09 Drew Did the heads blow up?

20:10 Adam The Fembots' heads blew up.

20:13 Drew That's wordy.

20:13 Guest I think scanners are still cooler.

20:15 Drew Still cooler. Thank you.

20:16 Guest Still relevant.

20:17 Drew Thank you. Lucas.

20:19 Yeah.

20:20 Drew You're 20. What's up?

20:21 Caller Hey, I had this, I guess it was one night stand, but not really. I'm in the Navy. I'm stationed in Washington. And met this chick, had sex with her. And then I went down to San Diego for a school, and she lived down there, and we had sex again. So I called her up, you know, hey, what's up? So we had sex then, and the first time we used the condom full time. And then the second time down in San Diego, I used the condom for like half the time. And then before, way before I even came, I pulled out, went in the bathroom, you know, whatever.

20:57 Guest Oh, you're all good, dude.

20:58 Caller What's up?

20:59 Guest Yeah, you're all good.

21:00 Drew No condom, you pulled out, but what, she says she's pregnant?

21:03 Caller Right, right.

21:04 Drew She does?

21:05 Caller Well, she is pregnant. I went through a couple of appointments with her. She had an ultrasound, heard the baby's heartbeat. Well, there you go. Yeah, but I'm kind of freaked out. I kind of don't know what to do.

21:16 Drew Well, do you not think it's your child?

21:20 Caller I'm kind of skeptical on that because, you know, she was just so willing to have sex with me. You know, who else would she be willing to have sex with?

21:26 Adam I love how guys' minds work.

21:28 Drew You're special, buddy. You're 20 years old. You make 22 grand a year. I mean, you're special. What? Do you say you were in the service?

21:40 Caller Right. I'm in the Navy.

21:42 Drew What do you do?

21:44 Caller I'm on submarines. I'm an electronic technician. Yeah.

21:50 Drew Yeah.

21:52 Caller What?

21:52 Drew Are you on a newer vessel?

21:56 Caller Actually, have you ever seen Crimson Tide?

21:58 Drew Yeah.

21:59 Caller Yeah. The Alabama. That's mine.

22:00 Drew That's my movie. That's where the guy's head blew up.

22:03 Guest So it's like a nuclear submarine?

22:05 Drew Yeah.

22:06 Caller No, but Dr. Drew is right about Austin Powers.

22:09 Drew So you think... Well, that's your sub. So you just sit there. You know, I like the part on the sub, I like the part where people have to be quiet.

22:15 Caller Right, right. Well, yeah, if we're not quiet, then other stuff can hear us and then we're giving our position away.

22:22 Drew That's the part that's crazy. Like, we've not been able to figure out... Two things we need to work out. We need to work out the gas thing. So it tells you actually know how many miles are left. And we need to work out a sub where if a guy farts at the 5,000 fathoms, it doesn't alert the Soviet sub that's 600 meters away. You know what I'm saying?

22:42 Adam Yeah.

22:43 Drew I just like that part.

22:45 Adam Yeah, it's quiet. There's 18 feet of steel between us and the... And six miles.

22:50 Drew And then, yeah, six miles of ocean.

22:53 Adam Yeah, and 18 feet of steel between us and the next guy.

22:55 Drew Shh. Yeah, that's a good job. You guys can stand or water as long as you want, right? You can do whatever you want. You go out at sea forever.

23:05 Adam Do you just sort of fix things or do you operate particular machinery?

23:10 Caller I operate navigation, electronic.

23:13 Drew All right. All right, well, here's the thing. You can get a DNA test with this chick.

23:20 Adam Yep, and you can get a girl pregnant by just pulling out the way you did.

23:24 Drew Yeah, do you have feelings for her?

23:27 Caller Oh, no, I like I'm not dumb, so I told her, you know, hey, I'm not going to marry you and I didn't want to be with you before, so I don't know if I want to be with you now.

23:38 Drew Is she have a plan?

23:39 Adam She's going to keep brutal, nice and honest, but brutal is I mean, you know, she's going to keep the child.

23:50 Caller Well, yeah, she's not going to get an abortion or like that. We talked about adoption and she started crying. So I stopped talking about it.

23:57 Adam Well, keep talking about it. No, no, keep talking about adoption. Yeah, that's a good thing.

24:01 Drew Yeah. Yeah. Let me tell you this about submarines.

24:08 Adam They can stay in the water forever.

24:09 Drew Well, you know, the old, the old subs weren't really underwater that much.

24:15 Adam Really?

24:15 Drew No.

24:16 Adam They just stayed at the surface?

24:17 Drew Well, they couldn't go underwater because they were only, here's the thing, here's the thing. The World War II subs, the subs were basically surface ships that went underwater for little bits and pieces of time. When they were underwater, they traveled by battery. They'd do electric motor underwater. They couldn't run a diesel motor underwater.

24:34 Adam Too much.

24:35 Drew They needed the air, they couldn't exhaust the thing, and they couldn't get the air in. So they had to run on the surface on the diesel to recharge their batteries. Then when they went underwater, they could only stay under for a short period of time, and they were slow. Then went like 11 knots or something, very slow underwater, because they'd have to switch to battery power as soon as they went underwater.

24:55 Adam Interesting.

24:55 Drew Now it's all nuclear power. They can stay under. They never have to come back up for air, and they never have to vent or do anything like that. Create their own oxygen. They never, they just never have to come back up now, whereas they used to be up all the time. That's where they used to get it with the ships and stuff. All right, hey, good times.

25:11 Guest Wow.

25:12 Drew You go home, you watch the History Channel, you learn something.

25:15 Guest Wait, but can we make a point though? I mean, if she does keep the child, and even if he doesn't know if it's his or not, I think that he should be there for her.

25:26 Adam He should raise, I mean, in the big picture of what's right and wrong in the world, yes, absolutely, whether or not he marries her is not even as important as being a participant in the child's parenting, and for the rest of the child's life, frankly, but he just sounds not up for any of that, which is bad for the kid.

25:41 Guest Right, it's gonna mess up the kid.

25:42 Adam Which is why the kid should be given to two parents who are ready to have kids with adoption.

25:46 Drew Yeah, and it's gotta be tough, and kinda weird too, because you have to sorta act like it's your kid until proven otherwise, which we can do these days.

25:56 Guest I think they should have a baby test. You gotta have a license to drive. You should have a license to have children.

26:03 Adam Hey, here, here.

26:04 Drew Oh yeah.

26:05 Adam That's our, that's our.

26:06 Guest There's another thing we need to work on.

26:08 Adam Oh no, no, our belief is that the big problem in the world, or at least this country, is screwed up people, screwing up kids.

26:14 Drew Let's go ahead and spread that out to the world.

26:16 Adam Yeah.

26:18 Drew Let me start spreading out toward some of these other continents to see a few problems too. Yeah. All right, we're going to take ourselves a little break. We'll be right back with more us and more you after this. Loveline. Yeah, Loveline, I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Next week, we got Adam Rodriguez from CSI Miami and Puddle of Mud and Pink and Kathy Griffin and Rob Schneider and Blink 22. I like Blink.

26:57 Guest I actually heard a story about Pink. Yeah, let's hear it. I had to deal with that girl that called about the, I guess she did a photo shoot and she had a little slug trail.

27:08 Drew Wow. Oh.

27:09 Guest Really?

27:11 Adam Where'd you hear that? I'm more curious about where that came from.

27:13 Guest Well, because I'm a model and I hear, you know.

27:14 Adam A photographer tell you that or something?

27:15 Guest No, it was a stylist.

27:17 Adam Hair stylist?

27:18 Guest No, a clothing stylist.

27:19 Drew Clothing stylist. Left a little, forget me not, in the pants there.

27:24 Guest This is gonna be a cat fight next time we're here.

27:26 Guest Hey, I'll get in a cat fight with her.

27:27 Adam I'm gonna tell Pinkle.

27:28 Drew Mia, by the way, is a plus size model. And I was thinking, do you have, I mean, you know, most models are trying to keep their weight down. Do you have to keep your weight up, or at least at a certain?

27:40 Guest It's funny, cause last year there was a time where I was losing weight and I think one of my agents, they sent this girl out to take me out to dinner all the time. Oh, really? Yeah, I swear to God that's what happened. No, I mean, we get to eat whatever we want.

27:56 Drew But is there a, I would imagine there's a no man's zone.

28:00 Guest Well, probably about 20, 15, 20 pounds. Like ours is called 1020, so it sizes 10 to 20. We don't have a whole lot of 20. I mean, I get a lot of like, I get a lot of hate mail from girls that are like, say size 20, that are like, how dare you? You're not a plus size. Because I'm not, and I'm like, you know what? I represent somebody that's my size and not, you know, anything else. So I mean, I get it from both sides. I'm either too fat or I'm too skinny.

28:25 Drew I'm just saying if you, if, I don't know where the ceiling is, there's gotta be a little, a little no man's zone between the plus size and the ones that you don't want to fall into. I mean, you, you could free fall into the regular model zone or you could get up in a plus size. We don't want to get caught in that 142 pound in-between spot.

28:45 Guest You know, I've been getting a lot of email lately about girls who want to be models. And they're like, well, we're in the in-between. So now they're starting to like rise up.

28:52 Adam The in-between.

28:52 Guest The in-between.

28:53 Adam So we'll call it in-between size.

28:55 Drew Yeah. It's, it's, it's like, it's like in a, in a, it'd be like, it's like your cruiser weight. You want to go up to heavyweight or get down to light heavy. You don't want to hang out in cruiser weight.

29:04 Adam You gotta start developing that term cruiser weight.

29:07 Drew You may, you may be getting close to cruiser. You got to step up to heavy or you got to drop down to light heavy. That's where the money fights are. You see what I'm saying? Drew.

29:16 Adam I'm a cruiserweight. Cruiserweight.

29:18 Drew Cruiserweight champion of the world. Know his name?

29:20 Adam No.

29:20 Drew No, you don't.

29:20 Adam Never.

29:21 Drew That's my point. There you go.

29:23 Guest It's a good line to be in though.

29:24 Drew Cruiser?

29:25 Guest No, I mean just.

29:26 Drew Oh, plus size model.

29:27 Guest Well, I mean, you make so much money and you just stand there and like, hey. Oh my God, it's ridiculous.

29:32 Drew Modeling's hard work.

29:33 Guest Well, I mean, I started getting tired of it because you can't really use your brain. So I started a band and doing other things, but like.

29:41 Drew It seems to me that the part of like, the real downside of modeling would be the, you know, the heroin, the vomiting, the constant dieting and the self. But if you're plus size model, then you're great. You got all the pluses, pardon the pun, of modeling and none of the minuses.

29:58 Guest They fly you out for free. They put you up in hotels for free. They give you food for free and you get paid.

30:04 Adam How'd you guys meet?

30:05 Guest We actually met at the Aerosmith Icon thing that they had a couple of years ago.

30:10 Guest For MTV. He sat behind me. There's all these, we came out to check our seats earlier and there was like Cher and Limp Bizkit and I was just like, ugh. And then I saw Pop Roach behind, sitting right behind me and I was like, all right, I like them. And I kind of flirted with him all night.

30:24 Drew Do you and Liv have the same mom?

30:26 Guest Oh, no.

30:27 Drew No?

30:28 Guest No.

30:28 Drew You look like you do.

30:29 Guest No.

30:30 Drew No? Is that a bad thing? Yeah.

30:32 Adam Really?

30:33 Drew I don't know all the deal.

30:34 Adam Tell us more. Tell us more.

30:36 Drew Tell us more.

30:37 Guest Well, you know what?

30:38 Drew Did you get along with Liv?

30:39 Guest Yeah. No, I love my sister. It's just, you know what? There was this thing that happens and I'm sure it happens with all rock stars. There's a phase that they go through where they meet women that they probably shouldn't be with and they have children and they love their children, but you know, you gotta move on. And some of them are just crazy.

30:57 Drew That's Liv's mom?

30:58 Guest Liv's mom. Yeah. She's a little crazy.

30:59 Drew Your mom, you're okay with?

31:01 Guest No, my mom passed away.

31:02 Drew Oh, what happened? Sorry to hear that.

31:03 Guest Brain cancer.

31:04 Drew Oh my God.

31:05 Adam Primary brain cancer? It's only in the brain, nowhere else?

31:09 Guest Yeah.

31:10 Drew I didn't mean, primary means it didn't start somewhere and spread.

31:13 Guest Right, I'm a high school dropout, so. Last September.

31:19 Adam Oh my goodness.

31:20 Guest Not this past September, the one before.

31:22 Adam How old was she?

31:23 Guest 50, 50. They gave her 18 months and she died like exactly 18 months. It's crazy.

31:30 Adam Wow.

31:30 Guest It's weird when you see, when you watch death happen, it's like, you resort back to being a child again. Like, you see her go back.

31:39 Adam Well, with the brain, the brain thing.

31:40 Guest Right, she was like a toddler and then she couldn't speak and it was like, she was an infant and it was just like.

31:45 Adam That's with the brain, the generation, that's the way it is, yeah.

31:47 Guest Well, you know, you were just talking about the brain before and learning about it and it just, it really opened my eyes to like.

31:53 Adam How much this is just a biological instrument. Yeah.

31:57 Drew Wow, that's tough. So, so that's, and that's the good one. The bad one's Liv's mom and she's.

32:03 Guest Yeah.

32:03 Drew She's dancing a jig right now, right?

32:05 Adam At large.

32:06 Drew She's at large. Yeah.

32:07 Guest She is at large.

32:08 Drew But you know what's weird is, is she's had some powerful spunk Steven Tyler has.

32:15 Guest You should see my little sister. She's, she's 14. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen. She's going to be the one in the family that surpasses everyone. She's unbelievably gorgeous. And there's a little boy too, Taj.

32:28 Drew I got to get some of that guy semen. I do because.

32:31 Adam And do what with it? And do what?

32:35 Drew Listen, I get the semen first, then I come up with the plan.

32:38 Adam Easy guy.

32:39 Drew That's my, that's my, that's my move. Well, here's what I'm saying is, you look, you and Liv look quite a bit alike. I mean, you're a slightly larger version, but you guys look similar. Well, more than similar, I would say, right? Yeah. And it's strange that that's all coming from one side. Yeah. Am I right?

33:00 Adam Yeah, but he has sort of pronounced features.

33:01 Drew He does. And maybe he has taste that are the same too.

33:05 Adam Yeah, yeah, interesting.

33:06 Drew No, you don't look like him, but you look like each other. And you have two different moms, so he must have a pretty powerful hand in his pants. That's awesome.

33:15 Guest Well, our little sister and brother, they have a different mom too.

33:17 Drew And they look like him too?

33:18 Guest Well, my little sister looks just like him, but like the mouth wise, but she's just beautiful. She's got like our eyes and his mouth. And then our little brother, he's only 11, so you can't really tell what he's gonna look like.

33:28 Drew I have no use for the boy, but the girl, that's a different story. I might use him. I may harvest semen from him at some point. Not, you know, a couple years, months down the road, down the road, down the road for now. I mean him no harm. I'm just saying, I have no real use for it. Wow. Yeah, you know, in your dad is one of these guys where you could see he's got good chick components. Well, he's got a good taste, but he's got the big lips and the cheekbones and stuff. You can see where he'd make a good, where's there like guys like Ed Asner would make a good, that's not good chick, feature component feature stuff, you know, hairy back, rounded shoulders, that kind of thing. You see what I'm saying? Okay, where are we? But you know, the reason you guys may look alike too is because maybe your dad just has the same taste in women. Maybe he likes a certain look in a woman and the two women look similar. Is there anything to that?

34:27 Guest I mean, I don't want to say my mom was anything like BB.

34:31 Drew Well, don't say that they had the same coloring or something.

34:34 Guest No, I don't think they looked alike.

34:35 Drew No, they didn't look alike.

34:37 Guest No. He likes blondes because they've all been...

34:42 Drew They've all been blondes?

34:43 Guest Yeah, they're all blonde. Wow.

34:46 Drew Is your mom's blonde or what's blonde?

34:48 Guest Well, not originally, but after the peroxide she was.

34:54 Drew Faith? You're 23. You didn't have to tell me about the peroxide. What's up?

35:03 Caller Well, wow. I like to do this thing with my husband, like just to tease him, like dry hump him and like tease him about like, I don't know, you know, tease him with.

35:23 Guest Spit it out.

35:24 Caller With butt play and stuff like that. And like, you know, he could like it, you know, I mean. He doesn't but he could.

35:33 Drew He's not open.

35:34 Adam He doesn't like it, but he could like it.

35:36 Caller Yeah, sure. You know, he doesn't know that he could.

35:39 Adam Oh, I like how she thinks.

35:43 Drew It's like, I think it's like me and eating brains. Right.

35:47 Adam If you're open to it or pancreas or something.

35:50 Drew Eating all those weird parts that always sound weird to me.

35:52 Adam Sweetbreads.

35:55 Drew I don't want it, you know? That's it. If he doesn't want it, he doesn't want it. You know what?

35:58 Adam You would be more likely to like the brains than.

36:02 Guest Butt play?

36:02 Adam Butt play, yeah. This is something that women have decided men like and they don't like.

36:08 Guest Well, what, I mean, without getting too detailed, what sort of butt play?

36:14 Caller Well, like, I don't know. I just like, he thinks that I'm sickle and like, like, cause I like, like I have like deldos and just like to, you know, play around.

36:25 Drew Is this a, do you do any speed?

36:28 Caller Uh, no, not, not anymore.

36:30 Adam Yeah.

36:31 Drew You sound, sounds speedy.

36:33 Caller What? Well, cause I'm really nervous.

36:35 Adam No, no, that's a quality one.

36:36 Drew We say that once every 300 callers and it's always that they were doing speed. There's some, some, it's a, she's gonna put her on a hole so she don't take a fence of this. Here's the thing about speed. There's a tone and, and a rhythm. And it's not sped up. It's burnt out. It's like, she's 23.

36:58 Adam And she's at, And you hear 44.

37:01 Drew Right.

37:02 Guest Her voice sounds older than she is.

37:04 Drew And, and for some reason that speed, it's, it's like, it's, it's ironically, tobacco and speed. Tobacco and speed. It is, you've, you've taken 23 years of life. It's more like you've taken 45 years of life and crammed it into 23 years on the earth. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. Yeah. It's really not a bad way to go. Cause then you die at 80. It's like you're 145.

37:26 Guest You ever see that movie, Spun? That movie's crazy.

37:30 Drew Oh, really? Yeah.

37:31 Guest It's really good.

37:31 Guest It's all about speed.

37:32 Guest It's about, there's like, Oh, yeah.

37:35 Guest Yeah.

37:36 Drew It was just eight or nine months old or a year old.

37:39 Guest Yeah. Something like that.

37:39 Guest Yeah.

37:40 Guest Like it just came out on video, I think.

37:41 Drew I always think I'm gonna freak out when I see movies like that.

37:43 Guest Oh my God.

37:43 Drew Yeah, that's my feeling.

37:44 Guest It takes you right into that world. It's like, damn.

37:47 Drew That's what I mean.

37:49 Caller You know what it is?

37:50 Caller I'm actually, I'm in recovery.

37:52 Caller Yeah.

37:52 Adam I know, that's good.

37:53 Drew We hear that. That's good.

37:55 Guest That's awesome. Awesome.

37:56 Caller Yeah, but it was actually Coke was my drug of choice, really.

38:00 Drew Okay.

38:01 Caller All right.

38:02 Drew Well, good. Yeah, all right. And this is your husband, right?

38:07 Guest So he lets you do it, though?

38:09 Caller Yeah, but yeah, he thinks it's like weird and.

38:12 Guest But he still lets you do it.

38:14 Adam So. He lets you do it. He's never going to like it.

38:17 Drew He lets you do what?

38:17 Guest Just be happy that he lets you do it.

38:19 Drew You do stuff to him with your stuff?

38:21 Guest Like waving around at him or something?

38:24 Caller I'm like, you know, like I don't really like, I don't stick it in or anything, you know.

38:28 Guest So you just tease him with the idea.

38:30 Caller Right, right.

38:31 Guest So what's the problem?

38:35 Caller I don't know. I just, I don't want my husband to think like, I'm like some sort of pervert, you know.

38:40 Guest You kind of are.

38:41 Drew And by the way.

38:43 Adam I mean, you know what? This is guys, this is more about guys being a little bit anxious when a woman is too sexual with them. And not all guys are that way, but some guys, at a certain point, just kind of push back. It's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. It's like, they feel intruded upon it.

38:58 Drew How much sobriety do you have?

39:02 Caller Three and a half months. Oh, right.

39:04 Adam So this is, this is still part of that. Yeah. Wow.

39:10 Drew Don't turn his anus into your crack pipe.

39:12 Adam One of the things that, or your dildo either, one of the things that goes up in the first six months of abstinence.

39:18 Drew Yeah, don't turn your dildo into it. Now, I'll say.

39:20 Adam It's anus, it's anus.

39:21 Guest Do you like referring to like how like you just transfer one addiction to the other?

39:24 Adam It's not so much, it's not so much.

39:25 Drew She's pushing energy.

39:26 Adam Yeah, it's not so much cross addiction, is that addicts, particularly in the first six months of sobriety, crave thrill and things that are extreme. And this is part of that extreme, to get aroused, you have to have something extreme. And this is what we're hearing, and sort of the speedy quality, and it's all fits in with early recovery, and it's fine.

39:43 Drew And by the way, let me ask this, even though technically you've stopped doing the drugs, and that's great, if you just keep charging forward with the sort of extreme behavior, It's not recovery. Gambling and skydiving.

39:55 Adam No, it's not recovery, but this will come. She'll address this in time with her sponsor.

40:00 Drew Let's do a little classical music and take a walk.

40:02 Adam Talk to your sponsor about this.

40:03 Guest Extreme pottery or something. Talk to your sponsor about that, man.

40:07 Adam Extreme clay throwing.

40:09 Drew I'm a ceramics major, I know about that.

40:11 Adam Pot throwing. Listen, Faith, just to talk to your sponsor about this, just have a little discussion with her about it.

40:16 Guest Yeah, cause she might push her husband away too.

40:18 Adam It's gonna be all right, it's gonna be fine. This is not a big deal in terms of threatening her sobriety or anything, just a little tune up here. And he'll be fine too, he's fine.

40:27 Drew Mia's here tonight, David's here tonight, new couple just married three weeks ago from Papa Roach.

40:34 Adam Where'd you go in your honeymoon, sorry.

40:35 Guest We haven't gone yet.

40:38 Guest We'll tell you the story.

40:39 Guest Yeah, we'll get into that.

40:40 Drew We'll take a quick break, we'll be back after this. That's Dr. Drew, got a little ass stain on his shirt. No big deal. I could have been my fart, I blasted in the bathroom.

41:04 Adam You almost knocked me out.

41:04 Drew I let a big one go.

41:05 Adam I'm so proud of myself, too.

41:09 Drew Well, it's nice, too, because it's like spinning that wheel. Sometimes it lands on your number, not usual. I mean, I blow gas all the time, right? Nothing.

41:16 Adam You knocked me right out the door.

41:17 Drew Nothing, but this time, I was like, whoa.

41:18 Guest Oh, baby, they sound like us.

41:22 Drew You guys probably can muster up a pretty good trumpet, too.

41:25 Guest Oh, you don't even know the half of it. What were we calling it this morning? Moose calls?

41:32 Guest We're pretty comfortable on each other.

41:34 Drew I mean, David, you're a big man. I mean, you probably muster up a pretty good...

41:40 Guest I can belt them out...

41:43 Drew I'll tell you something. I learned a valuable lesson with a fat friend of mine once when I blew a nice big fart, was laughing pretty hard.

41:51 Guest What do you call me, fat now?

41:52 Drew Friend of mine. Husky. You're husky. You're plus size. And this guy let something go that was something... Like, you know how an opera singer's gotta be fat and a skinny guy could just... A skinny guy could have a nice voice, but he could never sound like Pavarotti. You know what I'm saying? This guy let something go that came from the bowels of hell. And I was like, I was like, and he was like, and I thought, wow, that's something only a big man can do.

42:20 Adam Yeah, but you wouldn't tugbo versus a freaking Queen Mary. You know, what do you do?

42:24 Drew Yeah, can't do it. Yeah, I mean, that was humbling. That was a humbling experience.

42:29 Guest I enjoy it.

42:33 Drew Yeah, good times. Good times. Rebecca? Rebecca? You're 18? What's up?

42:44 Caller I'm six months pregnant. Okay, the guy that I was with, we were together for like three years. I met him when I was 15, he was 14. I moved in with him like two weeks after. And to make long story short, we lived together for like two years.

43:01 Adam Hold on, hold on, slow down. And this is the father of the child?

43:05 Caller Yes.

43:06 Adam And at 15 and 14, you guys are playing house together? How did you support yourself?

43:12 Caller Huh?

43:13 Adam How did you support yourself?

43:14 Caller Well, I moved in with his mom. My mom was- Okay, keep going. And I had lived on my own since I was like 14.

43:23 Adam What went on in your house that you had to leave?

43:26 Caller Well, my mom, I've never really had a stable home. I mean, I've lived in like 60 places.

43:32 Adam Because you were just with your mom or with both parents?

43:36 Caller Well, I moved in with my dad for like a little while, but my dad's like, he did drugs for like 20 years and he's like a manic depressive, schizophrenic, paranoid.

43:49 Drew Again, I don't like to sound like Hitler here, but we got to take the Rebecca's of the world, see where they're heading, and get them on the Knorr plant often and early. Oh yeah. Oh, and now she's got a six, now she's got a kid. The world's most effed up chick is gonna raise a kid.

44:07 Caller And then we're gonna have to deal with it. Cause I realize everything like, I've been in counseling and treatment and stuff.

44:15 Adam Oh good, oh good, oh good.

44:17 Drew You're definitely a lot better than you should be, which is a compliment, but still you need another five, eight, ten years of counseling before you can sort of undo all that's been done.

44:29 Adam Well, let's tell, what's going on now?

44:31 Caller Okay, well, long story short, we've lived together for about two years. We moved around about six, seven different places because his mom took us out. We visited his dad, his dad was a crackhead and we left for Thanksgiving weekend and he ended up disappearing and everything we owned and we paid for was stolen out of the house. And then, I don't know, my mom finally got a house.

44:58 Adam It was like when people announced it's gonna be a long story short.

45:02 Drew This is a short version.

45:03 Adam Oh, really?

45:06 Drew Yeah, what is the question?

45:08 Caller Okay, well, I was just gonna say we were together for three years. We lived together for two and a half and then I got pregnant and I finally moved in with my mom. He moved in with his mom. They both ended up getting a house and he died three weeks ago.

45:25 Drew Your boyfriend died three weeks ago.

45:29 Caller Yeah, the one that I was...

45:32 Caller Right, what happened to him?

45:33 Adam What happened?

45:35 Caller Well, there was like a billion different stories that are going around.

45:39 Drew Well, just give us 500,000.

45:41 Caller No, basically there's like, he was riding a dirt bike and it was raining and he was riding a dirt bike up and down just like a side street. He had just gotten a dirt bike and he loved dirt bikes. And there's like a few stories, like he was playing chicken with his friend.

46:02 Drew We're gonna take a break.

46:03 Adam It's war and peace.

46:05 Drew I feel bad because of what's going on, but cracking the whip behind Rebecca doesn't get my, well, there's maybe a thousand stories, but they all involve a dirt bike and him hitting a car, right?

46:17 Adam Presumably. I don't even have gotten there yet.

46:20 Drew I got it, just cause I got to torture myself. Rebecca?

46:23 Caller Yes?

46:23 Drew Did he crash on the motorcycle?

46:26 Caller Yeah, he split off the motorcycle.

46:30 Drew And he died because he got in a motorcycle accident.

46:33 Caller Yeah.

46:36 Adam You have to keep your finger on the hole button when we talk to her next time.

46:38 Drew Ha, punching it. It's like.

46:39 Adam We'll talk to her more.

46:41 Drew It's really, it's like whack-a-mole. This is horrible, but don't worry. We're going to clean things up. But really she should have a kid. She should have a kid. This, this is mom and dad's gone. Take a break. We'll be right back.

46:57 Caller All right, guys, here's the deal. Looking to hook up? Call the Dateline. Sick of wasting time with the wrong person? Call the Dateline. One call is all you need to make. Call the Dateline. 1-877-889. Date.

47:21 Drew Hey, everybody, it's Loveline and Adam. David's here from Papa Roach and his beautiful wife, Mia Taylor. I mean, Tyler. I just straightened it out. I beat you to it. I beat you to it. Papa Roach is working on a CD.

47:37 Guest That's right.

47:37 Adam I'm glad you mentioned that, Adam. That's a fascinating story.

47:40 Guest Yeah, I knew I was here for something.

47:41 Guest Best CD ever.

47:42 Drew Yeah, they're working on the best CD ever.

47:45 Guest Right now, basically smack dab right in the middle of the project right now. And we're doing the show on Saturday, Smoke Out, Cypress Hills show.

47:52 Guest And you play three new songs.

47:54 Drew Show Fairgrounds.

47:55 Guest Am I doing the interview or are you doing the interview?

47:57 Adam What are you doing? Sorry.

47:59 Guest I thought you were going to forget that.

48:01 Guest Yeah, I'm going to forget.

48:02 Drew When is the CD going to drop? That's what we call it.

48:05 Guest Actually, probably sometime early next year. But Howard Benson is producing it and we're right now recording it up in North Hollywood. And I feel like it's the best stuff we've ever had.

48:19 Drew Yeah.

48:19 Guest I know a lot of bands come in here and go like, right, typical Lancer, right?

48:22 Drew No, they usually don't.

48:24 Adam No, they don't, yeah.

48:24 Guest You know, bands come in and they're like, you know, it's like our album's going to be the hardest record that we've ever done or it's going to be the most whatever this and that. But I think just overall, without giving away any direction or whatever, it's just the best sounding stuff we've ever done.

48:39 Drew North Hollywood, my hometown, by the way. And it is a little sad that the porn has moved out and that the recording has moved in.

48:48 Adam Yeah, it's sad for North Hollywood, huh? Where's the porn?

48:51 Drew We all shed a tear. Where'd it go?

48:52 Guest Did it go to OC?

48:54 Drew No, it went to the West Valley, went to like Northridge and Chatsworth and stuff. Yeah, it moved out that way. We'll get it back.

49:02 Adam What moves it around?

49:05 Drew Seamen. Okay. It actually floated to Chatsworth.

49:09 Adam Just think of it.

49:10 Drew Seamen's very slick, doesn't take much. You ride right on the surface. Three, four inches of seamen you can get around on. You're not gonna drag your keel on.

49:17 Adam No, no, no.

49:19 Drew All right. Yeah, I don't know what brought it over there, but now everyone records in North Hollywood. You're somewhere in the Lankershim or Vineland or something. Magnolia.

49:27 Guest Right there.

49:27 Drew Yeah, that's where I grew up. Yeah, it's a good time.

49:30 Guest Dancing in the Ashes is the working title.

49:33 Drew And it's gonna be coming out fairly early next year?

49:36 Guest Probably, we're looking maybe April, May, something like that.

49:40 Drew All right.

49:40 Guest Maybe earlier, maybe later.

49:41 Drew Let's come back on and promote it when you do.

49:44 Guest That's right.

49:44 Drew Rebecca?

49:46 Caller Yes?

49:46 Drew You're 18?

49:48 Caller Yes.

49:49 Adam No, we've been talking to you.

49:50 Drew We've been talking to you, yeah.

49:51 Adam So your boyfriend of three years you've been living with basically since you were 14 and 15.

49:55 Drew Rebecca's had a horrible life, moved around all over the place, been with a guy for a long time. Now is a six month old.

50:00 Adam Six months pregnant.

50:01 Drew Oh, six months pregnant. You were gonna raise a child together, but he got in a motorcycle accident and he died.

50:10 Caller Yes, he died three weeks ago.

50:15 Adam And what's your question? What's your question?

50:17 Caller Okay, well, the thing is I was so like in love with him. Like we were so in love with each other. And now that he's dead, I just, I don't understand why I'm not feeling anything. I don't cry. I don't, I look at his picture. I know he's dead. I went to the funeral. I went to the viewing. I went to everything. And it doesn't even, I just go on with my normal life. Like it didn't even happen. And then I don't understand that why I want to mourn. And I want to, you know, cause I want to finish with, I know there's like five steps in the grieving process and all that other stuff. And I want to start doing it. And I want to cry. I just can't.

50:58 Adam Well, you also know that some of the early steps are include denial. And I think you may be saying-

51:02 Guest It'll happen. That's what happened with me when my mom died last year. I didn't cry. I mean, I kind of, he helped me, kind of forced it out of me the day it happened. And it took me a couple of weeks to really realize.

51:15 Guest I'm like, you know, it's okay to cry, you know? She's sort of like-

51:18 Guest Yeah, I know that.

51:27 Drew I bet. Listen, Rebecca, you can't dictate a cadence to your tear ducts.

51:33 Adam Well, no, it's really-

51:34 Drew Thank you, Drew.

51:35 Adam But you're right, but she's sort of dissociated and she, and as such, she may not mourn. She may not have that mechanism to make sure her biology may prevent her from-

51:43 Drew Is this someone who's been through what the Rebecca's been through-

51:46 Adam Right, she goes into survival mode. Yes, and it's somewhat adaptive that she's doing this because that's what she's done her whole life. However, there will be a price to be paid.

51:55 Drew Okay, well, let's just say this. Rebecca, the greatest gift you could give this guy, the greatest homage you could give to his legacy is to raise this child in a very healthy way, not get hooked up with any bad guys or abusive guys, not get pregnant for- I know you don't plan on being with anyone else for a long time, but fast forward-

52:19 Adam Six years.

52:20 Drew Six years?

52:21 Adam But you know-

52:22 Drew I was gonna say three weeks. Yeah. I mean, you kidding me? Let's face it, you're gonna be with some guy in the next couple of months. Let's face it. As soon as a kid pops out, you're gonna be with another guy. Just make sure he's a good guy and he's good to the kid and he's good to you and you raise a kid well and you don't have any more for a little while. Or give the kid up for adoption. How about that?

52:45 Caller Well, I don't want to because that's a piece of him.

52:49 Drew All right, well, how about you give a piece of him a chance by being raised by two mature, loving parents?

52:56 Caller No, but there's so many people in his family. There's so many people that are willing to help me and everybody wants to see the kid. And I know this kid is not going to go without anything. I'm going to have a lot of help.

53:12 Adam Although even when he was around, you guys were moving around an awful lot.

53:15 Caller Yeah, but we finally settled down. And like the day that he got in that accident, he got a full-time job, he got a promotion. I'm in school. We finally started to get our lives together.

53:28 Drew This guy, his mom, his dad, his family, they're good people. They'll be good around the kid. Um, I'm not sure if that's a good response. I don't, I'm picturing this guy's family. I know there's a lot of people that want to see the kid, but I'm not so sure the kid needs to see all. All right, you know what I'm saying. Look, whatever you're going to do, just give the kid up for adoption, please. But if you're not going to do that, then don't get, just somehow pay for him. I don't want to pay for him. That's really what this is all coming down to. That's all I'm saying. Jess. That poor kid. Jess, you're 21. What's up? And by the way, she's not going to be with another guy for a long time. What do you think that means?

54:19 Adam Yeah, a few months.

54:19 Drew I'd say six months would be an outside thing.

54:22 Adam What I was going to say, even if you fast forward six years, you have a six year old now and bring some Jack off into the household. It's still a six year old being exposed to these horrible idiots.

54:31 All right.

54:31 Drew Jess?

54:32 Yeah.

54:33 Drew You're 21?

54:36 Caller I can only enjoy sex when it's like really rough. Like, it's like, like if he's like choking me and calling me names and stuff and like hitting me.

54:46 Adam So where'd that come from?

54:47 Caller What do you mean?

54:49 Adam Where'd you learn? Where did you experience those sorts of things in the past?

54:52 Caller I was in an abusive relationship for a while.

54:56 Drew Before that?

54:58 Caller I don't know.

55:00 Drew Your dad, was he abusive?

55:02 Caller No, we just weren't really very close.

55:06 Adam No one ever hit you?

55:07 Caller No, just that boyfriend.

55:11 Adam So you were never struck growing up?

55:13 Caller Well, like spanked and stuff, I mean.

55:15 Adam Okay, and were they spanked with an object? Okay, that's physical abuse. That's what creates this whole thing. Okay, that's not spanking. Spanking is a little swat one time to get you to stop a behavior. Picking up an object and striking a child with it is physical abuse and it creates in the brain the changes that set up what you got there, Jess.

55:39 Drew Well, was your dad an alcoholic or something?

55:42 Caller No.

55:42 Adam No, all you need is the belt.

55:44 Drew What about just being frightened of your dad? Does that get this response?

55:48 Caller I don't know.

55:51 Adam This is physical abuse.

55:53 Drew How many times did you get whacked with a belt quite a bit?

55:57 Caller I don't know, like whenever I was bad or whatever.

56:01 Drew Was that more than 30 times in your life? All right. So you're beaten with a belt quite a bit. A lot of alliteration in that statement, by the way.

56:11 Adam Nice.

56:12 Drew All right. Jess? Yeah. You got whacked around with a belt and now that's what turns you on. That's why the mind is so feeble and screwed up.

56:20 Adam If they do MRIs on you, they'd actually find certain parts of your brain smaller than a normal person's and it's what's necessary for the things like hippocampus, the amygdala changes size and shape and relationship to other parts of the brain. In order to have arousal, you need these extreme experiences now because as though it sort of burns out those parts of your brain.

56:36 Drew What if you got beaten with a thesaurus?

56:38 Adam A different part of the brain. Anterosingular gyrus microbe.

56:41 Drew You got beaten with an encyclopedia or something? I like the hairbrush.

56:46 Adam Yeah, I had a patient that was beaten by that with a Bible.

56:49 Drew A Bible? My dad used to do it like that, you know.

56:52 Adam In your penis?

56:53 Drew Pow.

56:54 Adam Clapper?

56:55 Drew Didn't do the clapper. Yeah. He called it the clam shell. He called it the biblical snapper, he called it. My parents never beat me. It's not that they didn't want to, they're just like too lazy, they're like, that would, that would be, even beating would have been constituted a form of parenting. And it was like, that's too much, I'm not getting off the sofa. That would be a form of parenting, bad parenting, but still, still parenting. Jess? All right, maybe a little therapy for, for the belt? How about jogging in place?

57:32 Adam Yeah, you can, you can try to tolerate intimate relations without that, and see how it goes. It takes a while. We're talking about rewiring your brain takes quite a bit of time.

57:44 Drew I know you always, you crap on my Pollyanna-ish suggestions of classical music and long, long walks.

57:51 Adam No, I don't crap on that. I do not crap on that.

57:52 Drew Well, you laugh heartily. Only behind your back. Here's the thing, most people can't afford therapists, but there are books out there you can read. I mean, here's, here's the thing.

58:01 Guest There's the Internet.

58:02 Drew There's the Internet. And that you end up looking at Big Judd porn, though, that's stuff like this to me. I start looking for something that goes right to the Big Judd, but no, let me say this. Let me say this. Not everyone can afford the gym. You can't afford a spa membership, but you can get down and do some pushups in your living room and you can jog around your block. And sometimes from a mental health standpoint, you can't afford to go to a therapist, but you can read some books, you can look up some stuff on the Internet and you can have a little quiet time. I mean, you can get your Walkman, put on a little classical music, go walk around in the park for a while and think heavy thoughts. And I guarantee that's going to be better than just smoking cigarettes with your friends.

58:44 Adam Absolutely. That's good for mood and things like that, anxiety management. But for this, which is an interpersonal mechanism and intrapersonal, it's a little different. It's really about her wiring and she has to begin having experiences with her boyfriend or her husband, whoever, that don't include rough sex and see if she can connect with some kind of an arousal with that and if she can't, then that's, you know, I don't like the inter and the intra. Too close together.

59:10 Guest S&M is?

59:12 Adam It's from the people at S&M. S&M usually does some sort of physical abuse or something there that wires that.

59:19 Guest Wasn't there like a healthy version of that? Can you do all that and make it healthy?

59:24 Adam Yes, of course. But in her situation, she said she can only do it. She doesn't experience any arousal unless and that's a problem.

59:30 Drew What's there between inter and intra?

59:33 Adam Inter is between like there's a space between.

59:37 Drew That's intra.

59:37 Adam And intra is within.

59:38 Drew Yeah, too much. You know, like micro and macro. Horrible, horrible idea. Micro means you can't see it with the human eye and macro means as big as the planet. Now, really? You want them to sound almost the same? Totally different things? That disgusts me, Drew.

59:56 Adam I know. A lot of things bother you.

59:58 Drew I'm going to figure out. I got a whole bunch more of those micro, macro type words, too.

1:00:02 Adam Write them all down?

1:00:03 Drew Yeah.

1:00:03 Adam Push and pull?

1:00:06 Drew Push and pull. They're too close.

1:00:09 Adam This is what happens when you don't learn how to read at a young age.

1:00:11 Drew No, but here's the thing. Here's the problem with push and pull. You're heading into that diner and you got a good pace to your walk. You have purpose to your walk. Something like this ever happened. This humiliating experience has happened. Sunday morning, noon, you're going to the breakfast joint. Place is filled with people. You got a nice, you're moving at a good clip because you're hungry. You hit the door. It's that aluminum door. It says, it says pull, but you just see the PU part and you hit it with a little momentum and bang, the little bell goes whacking around the thing. Everyone turns and looks at you like you're retarded. Then you have to straighten your wrist out and then pull the door open and go in. Now, I'm saying, if one said yank and the other said push, that would never happen. You see what I'm saying? I think the two close, the words are too close together. They're both four letters. They both start with a P and a U and they mean totally different things. We just need to restructure it. That's all.

1:01:08 Adam New language.

1:01:09 Drew What's this for? The push in the pole part.

1:01:11 Adam Corolla. We're supposed to be Corolla.

1:01:13 Drew You guys, you guys can read more than two letters into a word when you're on the move that way. Yeah. You never get the push in the pole.

1:01:20 Guest No, I do that. Yeah.

1:01:21 Drew You always. People always.

1:01:22 Adam Yeah.

1:01:23 Guest But usually because I'm not reading the.

1:01:24 Adam You're either not reading it or you figure it looks like it's going to push in. It's easier.

1:01:28 Drew Yeah. Well, no. But when you decipher it, like when you really read it, when it registers is, is, is pull when it really registers, you don't push it in.

1:01:37 Adam But what you never do is go to the door and pull it. You go in and push it when it should have been pulled.

1:01:43 Guest Yeah.

1:01:45 Drew Once in a while, you'll screw it up that way.

1:01:47 Guest Color coded signs.

1:01:49 Adam There you go.

1:01:51 Guest Once one color.

1:01:52 Drew I'd be down. I'd be down with that too. But I'd also I'd also be down with if one just said push in the other letter. The other one started with a Z.

1:02:01 Guest Would you stop and actually take the time to read the sign?

1:02:03 Guest Just be careful around doors, dude.

1:02:05 Drew I'm moving. I'm on the move. I'm saying if the other letter started with a Z and then went right into a Y, you'd never have that. You'd recognize it immediately.

1:02:14 Guest But then you'd never be challenged.

1:02:16 Drew I'm challenged in every other facet of life.

1:02:19 Guest Well, this just goes back to what we were talking about earlier, people don't have time in their life for things like that.

1:02:24 Adam Yeah, they're rising to pop a roach in their new album they're working on.

1:02:27 Guest Yeah, that's right. Dancing in the Ashes, which should be out next year. And it's the best stuff we've ever made.

1:02:31 Drew That's right. Don't.

1:02:33 Guest What?

1:02:34 Drew Yeah. The band is.

1:02:35 Guest We're also playing Smoke Out on Saturday.

1:02:38 Drew That's right. In the National Orange Show Fairgrounds Place of Music, which is going to be this Saturday.

1:02:46 Guest We go on at 530. So show up for the whole show. But just remember, we go on at 530.

1:02:50 Drew Yeah. Don't get so baked that you can't stand up straight when Papa Roach is rocking.

1:02:55 Caller Rob?

1:02:56 Caller What up, man?

1:02:57 Drew You're 19?

1:02:58 Caller Yeah.

1:02:59 Drew Yeah.

1:03:01 Caller Yeah.

1:03:03 Drew Right.

1:03:03 Caller Are you going to smoke out?

1:03:05 Drew Who? Me?

1:03:05 Caller I'm going to be there.

1:03:06 Guest I'll be there.

1:03:07 Caller I'll be there. You're ready?

1:03:12 Drew I like when people tell you they're going to be somewhere before they get the answer. Like just make the announcement. I'm going to be there. Hey, man. Are you going to be well? I'll be there. All right. Just announce you're going to be there. You're going to be there, buddy?

1:03:26 Caller For sure.

1:03:27 Drew Who are you looking forward to seeing beside Papa Roach?

1:03:34 Caller They're going to be spending there.

1:03:36 Drew Oh, really?

1:03:37 Caller Yeah. And probably Cypher selling Pennywise. Cool.

1:03:41 Caller All right.

1:03:43 Drew Probably, though. He doesn't want to come in.

1:03:44 Caller And Chong, but he's not going to be there, so that sucks.

1:03:47 Guest Isn't he in jail?

1:03:48 Caller Yeah.

1:03:49 Guest What happened to Tommy Chong, man?

1:03:50 Drew All right. Let me tell you. He's in the joint. And speaking of Tommy Chong. He's in jail.

1:03:58 Caller For what?

1:03:59 Drew Selling bongs.

1:04:00 Caller Oh, that's right.

1:04:01 Drew And he was like made some kind of motion or something to get out. He's in jail.

1:04:06 Caller He's in jail.

1:04:07 Drew He ain't getting out. Meanwhile, I forgot that Robert Blake is out. I didn't even. I was surprised. I was surprised that Blake is out. But really, the Green River killer can't give him the death penalty. Forty eight bodies. He cut a deal. He's going to tell you where the other 15 prostitutes he mutilated were. And we'll let him out of the chair. That sounds like a great. I don't know why we don't renege on that stuff.

1:04:32 Adam Tommy Chon, we want to talk to you.

1:04:33 Drew Tommy Chon, we got to throw away the key. You don't bargain with the Tommy Chon.

1:04:37 Guest You know, free Tommy Chon.

1:04:39 Caller Yeah.

1:04:40 Drew Once people, once word gets out that you're bargaining with guys who sell glass cylinders, all hell breaks loose in a society.

1:04:47 Caller Yeah.

1:04:48 Drew And by the way, Tommy Chon in the joint, Green River Killer, going to, just going to sit there and just have gay sex for another 30 years and eat the food we provide him with. And, and this millionaire guy who dismembered his neighbor guy never didn't get convicted, by the way. I don't know if you know this guy, Durst. He like shot his neighbor and then like, Shot him, then he like dismembered him and they just like, they can't.

1:05:14 Guest It's because he like shot him by accident or something, right?

1:05:17 Drew Yeah, but where's the dismemberment part come in? Was that by accident too?

1:05:20 Adam I guess it was loaded or something.

1:05:22 Drew Well, you give the kid another chance. A little dismembering. It never hurt anybody. Here's all I'm saying. I just would like society to I would like the authorities to sort of care as much as we care. Like it's like, look, the Tommy Chong don't care that we've all taken a vote as a society. This guy paid taxes. He wasn't a threat to himself or anybody else. He's out. Is it really? What's it going to cost us, by the way? The whole the whole system. He's got to go through the whole system. It's got to be several hundred thousand dollars by the time the smoke smoke clears. And what do we got? We got a comedian who was selling bongs on the Internet. He's off the street for nine months. Oh, thank God we can sleep at night. But what happens when this animal's released back into society? He goes home to his house, which is bigger than all of ours, and bangs his hot wife for a while. What are we nuts? What the hell's going on? How come we don't?

1:06:24 Adam Yeah, that sort of lines up with our vomiting and eating blood worms.

1:06:31 Drew It's like, what goddamn year are we living in?

1:06:34 Adam We're all mixed up. 1984, dude. We can't figure out what year we're living in.

1:06:39 Drew I know. It's like Bin Laden's running around. We can't get to Hussein. Oh, we don't have enough guys to man the ports here. People are bringing in radioactive material through the ports.

1:06:53 Adam We can station people in every strip joint to make sure that no one touches. Yeah, no lab dances.

1:06:58 Drew All right. This just brings me to a good point. The answer to every question is always like manpower. It's like, look, a few months ago, ABC News or CBS News takes some spent uranium, puts it in a case in like Jakarta, puts it on a container ship, and then ships it right to the port of LA and trucks it right through downtown LA. That could have been a dirty bomb that would, you know, pollute the city for several thousand years. The answer from the government is, hey, look, we just don't have enough manpower to station enough guys at the port. We don't have the money, we don't have the manpower. And the cops do the same things. Like, hey, we don't have the money, we don't have the personnel, we don't have the manpower. You got a lot of meter maids. You got a ton of those meter maids. Millions of meter maids. A place is thick and rich with meter maids. They're coming down the goddamn hill every time I go up the hill at 2 in the morning. There's meter maids. You got a lot of them. Maybe we start converting those guys. Maybe we put them down at the port. You know, you don't have anybody at the port. Take the meter maids and put them down to the port. Show some presence down at the port. And then it's like, again, they never have the money, they never have the manpower, they never have this. You got Tommy Chong locked up, no problem. You seem to have no difficulty with the old stoners. These guys, you have plenty of time, plenty of resources, and plenty of manpower to put these guys away. That's no problem. It's the dirty bombs. We don't have the power. What? And you got plenty of, you got plenty of, plenty of guys you can station at the strip clubs here in Los Angeles to make sure there's the six foot lap boner radius that's around every guy. That is, you got guys for that. You had a whole task force for Heidi Flies. You had hundreds of guys for Heidi Flies. Why don't you have the guys to check the containers? Here's what I think. What would you rather do? You're gonna pose as an Asian businessman so you get a hand job from one of Heidi Flies' girls or go sit out at the port with some toothless guy waiting for uranium to come on in so you can go sterile?

1:09:02 Adam So you think it's just a better job?

1:09:03 Drew That's a better gig. Yeah. I mean, ultimately, what would you have time to do? Do you think about it? What would you rather do? Just go hang out with Tommy Chong or head down to the port? Get eaten by a giant rat? Yeah, hang out with Chong and Heidi's girls. We got plenty of guys for that. Not the port. There we go. All right, everybody. And here's all I'm saying. Here's what the cops need to do. Cops need to do what we tell them to do, not what they feel like doing. That's the deal. They work for us. That's it. We don't give a rat's ass about Tommy Chong. And these guys get into this like, well, hey, we're just enforcing the law. There's plenty of stuff that goes on. You don't have to enforce it. They write two tickets for jaywalking in New York every year. They write 200 million in the city of Burbank alone. You don't have to enforce it if you don't want to. You don't have to go after Tommy Chong if you don't want to. You think it's going to be some kind of public outcry? Oh, we're outraged. Why is Tommy Chong still walking the streets? No, we don't care. What we do care about is the port. Would you haul your ass over to the port and do what we tell you to do? I don't understand. Who's the cops working for? What are they? Some police state? What is this? What country are the cops from? Are they from here? Then do what we tell you to do. Get down to the port. Get out of the strip club. Haul the ass down to the port. That's what we want. Thank you.

1:10:25 Guest Amen.

1:10:26 Drew Papa Roach is going to drop a new CD coming out.

1:10:30 Adam This Saturday, National Orange Show.

1:10:54 Drew Hey, everybody. It's Loveline. That's Dr. Drew. David's here from Papa Roach. Mia Tyler is here. From Mia Tyler. Plus-size model. Is there good money in that?

1:11:11 Guest Oh, my God.

1:11:12 Drew Really?

1:11:12 Guest It's ridiculous.

1:11:13 Drew Nice.

1:11:14 Guest That's the only reason I do it.

1:11:16 Drew Is there a competition stiffer in the plus department or in the waif department?

1:11:24 Guest I'd probably say the waif department. I mean, most of them don't speak a whole lot of English, so they get catty real quick. I mean, when we first started, there was the older girls that got a little pissed off at the younger girls.

1:11:38 Drew Who's the big one? Was it Elle?

1:11:40 Guest Ellie?

1:11:41 Drew Emmy. That's right. Is she still around? You think you have a little longer career in the plus size because the plus size chicks look better for a longer period of time than the waify chicks. Yeah, they get dried up. They get wrinkly. Here, you see like a hefty black woman. She'd be 50, look like she's 21. The other ones look like you took the air out of a tire.

1:12:09 Adam It's called laxity.

1:12:10 Drew This thing got laxity. Yeah. And instead of a heftity or whatever, the point is you got a longer career. That's what I'm saying.

1:12:19 Adam Good, good times.

1:12:20 Drew Yeah, it's good times. I gotta look into that plus size mile.

1:12:23 Adam We gotta finish with Rob here.

1:12:24 Drew Oh, Rob?

1:12:25 Caller What up? Rob.

1:12:27 Drew You're 19?

1:12:28 Caller Yeah.

1:12:29 Drew What's happening?

1:12:30 Caller Yeah.

1:12:31 Caller I like ecstasy a lot.

1:12:33 Drew All right.

1:12:34 Caller Yeah. So like, if you do too, like, I don't know. I've done like four this one night and like I felt retarded for like six days or something.

1:12:43 Drew Yay. Like, yeah.

1:12:49 Caller Can you like tell me some stuff about it?

1:12:52 Drew Drew, what about it?

1:12:53 Adam Yeah, it's one of the it's one of the chemicals that's known to destroy brain tissue.

1:12:57 Caller I was going for like 12 hours that one night.

1:13:01 Adam Well, there's a separate thing that can happen where you can get what's called a post hallucinogenic perceptual disorder. You kind of locked in. You feel like you can't come down.

1:13:12 Caller Yeah, I kind of felt like that the next morning because like the feeling was all wavy.

1:13:15 Adam That's a bad sign. That's a sign that you have damaged the brain.

1:13:17 Guest That happened to me. Well, I mean, I don't do that stuff anymore, but we used to do so much and I thought people were walking through me.

1:13:23 Caller Oh, really?

1:13:24 Guest Yeah, I was walking down New York City and I turned to my friend. I was like, I think somebody just walked through me and I thought people actually like walking right through me.

1:13:33 Adam The thing you can kind of look out for what happens down the line from that is panic attacks and then depression. And because the cells, the brain cells are gone, you got to use medication to sort of try to raise the chemicals back up. That part of the brain is destroyed now.

1:13:50 Guest Just from my experiences with the stuff, I know for a couple of days afterwards, I'm just like, it just screws up your whole emotional system.

1:13:57 Adam It's damaged. It's like being hit in the head basically. The problem is those cells, they're gone now. And that's a chemical balance that's very delicate and very important in terms of being able just to function, to be able to get up and feel okay. And there's pharmacological things that can help that out.

1:14:16 Drew You know, I had a, you know, my name for the big and tall shop, the plus size shop for the guys. Big Sur.

1:14:27 Guest That's a good one.

1:14:28 Adam I think only Californians would really appreciate it.

1:14:30 Drew I think people around the country know Big Sur. I mean, I know Niagara Falls. You know what I'm saying? I know Lake Huron. You know what I'm saying?

1:14:40 Guest I'm telling you. Drew, don't crap on my big money.

1:14:43 Drew See, that's so you, Drew. This is a crap on my beautiful point.

1:14:47 Adam When you talk to me like that, man, I don't even know you.

1:14:48 Drew I don't even know you, man.

1:14:50 Adam I don't know you.

1:14:50 Drew No, I don't even know you. Or I do know you, but I don't like you.

1:14:53 Adam I don't want to know you either.

1:14:54 Drew I know you, but I think you're an a-hole. Big Sur. That's a solid name.

1:14:58 Caller Solid. I like it.

1:14:59 Adam It's a nice, clever.

1:15:01 Drew And it's a place you feel good about going into. And by the way, you know, we do, you know, we put the big, you know, they're fiberglass and they're hollowed out. Put the big Sequoia trees out front. That's how you know it's the Big Sur.

1:15:12 Adam No, with like a tuxedo on the little Sequoias. On the tree?

1:15:16 Drew I was thinking more of like a bit of a sort of a Paul Bunyan kind of vibe. That's a big man in a flannel shirt. Yeah, but of course, you know, we have casual and we have dress attire.

1:15:25 Adam Most of the Big Sur places are suits, though. That kind of thing, right?

1:15:30 Guest That's where you got to expand and make money.

1:15:32 Drew They got the casual.

1:15:34 Adam They got the casual stuff. She's thinking.

1:15:36 Drew And listen, you know, you keep hearing these reports about how fat America is getting. And you got to think that plus size stuff. That's big bucks.

1:15:44 Guest It's ridiculous.

1:15:45 Drew I mean, what? I don't know what it's. I don't know how much it's grown over the last 10 or 20 years. But when you see the reports going, it used to be, you know, one in one thousand were obese.

1:15:57 Guest Now one in every 50 is like obese and all that kind of between like obesity and like, you know, actual like, I mean, you know, I'm a chunky butt. I say it, I'm queen of the chunky butts. But there's a difference between like being obese and like being like my size. I'm like a 12 and like, I mean, I'm pretty healthy.

1:16:15 Drew No, I don't mean, I don't mean that you're obese or that your fashions are meant for the obese. I'm just saying the more we're heading that direction, the more people caught in between, the more plus size goods are going to be sold.

1:16:29 Guest Also, you know, it goes along with the fact that everybody's really lazy. What does everybody do? They go get fast food because it's the easiest, quickest thing to go get.

1:16:37 Drew Yeah.

1:16:38 Guest They drive there. Nobody exercises.

1:16:41 Drew No, just flapping their jaws.

1:16:43 Guest I mean, they make everything. If you go into like...

1:16:45 Adam No, wait, that's you.

1:16:47 Guest You go into like Lane Bryant stores, there's plus size socks.

1:16:50 Drew Oh, really?

1:16:50 Guest If you go into Torrid, which is a hot topic, it's like their plus size. It's like goth girl stuff. It's cool that they have... Yeah, it's for plus girls. They've got plus size jewelry, shoes, purses. Everything.

1:17:05 Drew They make it like contact lenses, fillings. They're all stepping up. I'm not kidding.

1:17:10 Adam Plus size earrings.

1:17:12 Drew Plus size earrings.

1:17:14 Guest Well, they do. They make plus size rings. You know, they make them a little bigger.

1:17:18 Drew If you got big hubcap size ears, you can't just put a little stud on there. You've got to put something big on there. Plus size earrings. Oh, the plus size goth chicks though. That's Wicca.

1:17:32 Guest Hey, what's the name? What's that name?

1:17:35 Drew Oh, you've got to make some...

1:17:37 Guest Gothopotamus.

1:17:39 Drew Oh, yeah. That's a scary look.

1:17:42 Guest I'm in trouble.

1:17:42 Drew The Wiccans are a big breed over there. And you've got to make some big stuff for the Wiccans. You've got to make them big black stretch pants and crazy pointy hats they wear and stuff. You've got to make the big stuff for the Wiccans.

1:17:54 Guest I love goth girls.

1:17:56 Drew They're big. They're big crew. Sorry. The black, it's true. It's slimming too, you know.

1:18:02 Caller Yes.

1:18:03 Drew You're 21?

1:18:04 Caller Yes, I am.

1:18:05 Drew What's up?

1:18:06 Caller I've been married for a little over two and a half years and we have a really great sex life. But what really turns me on is when my husband will look at porn of like girl and girl, like girl and girl stuff. And when he talks, like I'll ask him to talk about a girl that he like noticed when we're out, or like a girl in a magazine. And that really turns me on. But outside of the bedroom, I do not like him looking at other girls or like making it obvious. And I'm having like issues about that.

1:18:44 Adam Because why? He's unable to kind of keep it in the bedroom?

1:18:47 Caller Well, I feel that it's kind of my fault because I ask for it in the bedroom, but then in like everyday life, I don't want it.

1:18:55 Drew Well, how does he do it outside of the bedroom?

1:18:57 Caller Or it's just like when he'll look, I mean, he just makes it really obvious when he looks at other women in front of me.

1:19:03 Drew Does he really, does he intentionally make it obvious or you just catch him?

1:19:08 Caller I don't know because I know men look, but I mean, he doesn't need to do it in front of me.

1:19:13 Adam Does he clearly know it upsets you?

1:19:15 Caller Yes, he does.

1:19:17 Guest Where is your husband right now?

1:19:19 Caller He's in the military and he's actually in Iraq right now. He's coming home in two weeks. And I mean, he said that he's gonna not look at other women because he knows it hurts me and he sees how important I am to him.

1:19:33 Guest But then you like to hear about it, you know, in the bedroom, right?

1:19:36 Adam But you'd see how if she was getting him, if he really liked this whole thing that they do together, this whole dance they do, and on the outside he kind of playfully goes, look at that, you know, hey, what do you think? To try to get her going again. And then she's like, hey.

1:19:49 Guest Someone should tell him like, hey, you got a good thing going, bro, don't screw it up.

1:19:53 Adam Yeah, I think, yeah, right. I think he maybe just doesn't understand where her boundaries are with this.

1:19:57 Drew Well, it's a little bit of a mixed message.

1:19:59 Adam Absolutely, and you can see how the guy can get kind of confused about it.

1:20:02 Drew Yeah, also, he's, you know, 20-something and doesn't, you know, is in the military, doesn't give a rat's ass either. And also, Gina's got some energy with this and is sort of ultra hypervigilant about it, and there's some energy going on here where she's going to notice him doing something outside that bedroom no matter what. So what's up with you, Gina?

1:20:23 Adam Did your dad cheat or something? Your dad?

1:20:26 Drew Did he cheat on your mom?

1:20:28 Caller No, I think my mom cheated on him actually.

1:20:30 Drew All right, well, screw her.

1:20:32 Adam Got the different cheating thing going on here.

1:20:34 Drew Why do you think your mom cheated on him?

1:20:36 Caller Well, because my mom, like, I think I was right before I turned 16, my mom went on vacation to Arizona, and she called my dad up when she was down there saying that she wanted a divorce when she was gone.

1:20:49 Adam And so your fantasy was that she found somebody down there.

1:20:54 Drew She probably did.

1:20:55 Caller But that's my question. She could have found him years before. If I don't want him to look at other women outside of the bedroom, is it okay for me to ask him to do it in the bedroom?

1:21:04 Adam Yes, it's all fine. It's all fine.

1:21:06 Drew Yeah, do whatever you want. But listen, so then what happened? Did you move in with your mom? Did you move to Arizona?

1:21:12 Caller No, I've stayed with my father.

1:21:14 Drew Yeah, your bitter dad, how is he?

1:21:16 Caller Well, right now he's in Ohio. I mean, he's alone. He doesn't date or anything. My parents were married for 30 years.

1:21:25 Drew Did you get along okay with your dad?

1:21:28 Caller We have a great relationship.

1:21:30 Drew Okay, so you're not too screwy.

1:21:32 Adam 30 years, mom takes off and that's weird.

1:21:35 Drew After 30 years, mom takes off with her...

1:21:37 Guest I've heard of that happening a lot, though. Really? After 30 years, they split up.

1:21:43 Adam Was she wacky, the mom? That woman? Yeah. If something gets bipolar, gets alcoholic, gets going, I could see that, but just suddenly gets a wild hair, it doesn't make sense.

1:21:54 Drew Here's the other thing, too, everybody. I'm going to tell this to the newlyweds, too, because you guys need some advice. I'm going to help you navigate.

1:22:04 Guest We still have to tell you the story of our wedding. It's actually pretty cool.

1:22:08 Adam Give them the advice first, then we come back for the story.

1:22:10 Drew Let's not forget. We'll forget. Not good to set a whole bunch of guidelines about what you don't like about the other person and what they can do and can't do outside of the bedroom. It ends up, unless it's something that's destroying the relationship.

1:22:28 Adam It's really bothering you. You have to set those guidelines.

1:22:30 Drew Here's the thing, a lot of things can really bother you that aren't really damaging things. Right, right, right. And you can have a whole laundry list of things where you just go, hey, I personally just don't like it. And the person says, well, it's harmless. It doesn't do anything. And they go, yeah, but it's horrible for me. If you have a bunch of those, the relationship is going to be a little tough. It'll be tough for you too.

1:22:53 Adam Right.

1:22:53 Drew The person should work on not doing what it is that bothers you so much. You should work on not letting it bother you so much too.

1:23:03 Adam Here's the headline, be reasonable.

1:23:04 Drew Right. Yeah. Don't spend all your energy trying to get them to do something you don't want them to do. Use part of it on yourself. Easing your grip on it a little bit.

1:23:15 Adam All right.

1:23:15 Drew We'll have a marriage story.

1:23:18 Adam Yes.

1:23:18 Drew After this.

1:23:21 Adam Hello.

1:23:41 Drew That's David from Papa Roach. Playing the air whatever. And Mia Tyler's our guest tonight as well. They're married. They're going to tell us a marriage story.

1:23:52 Guest Well, I was just going to tell you a story about how we got married.

1:23:54 Drew Oh, okay.

1:23:55 Guest I think it's interesting. My dad was playing the show three weeks ago in Vegas, so we decided to go out.

1:24:03 Drew Aerosmith, by the way, is a dance band, right? And now did you, I don't know, I won't get you sidetracked too much, but did you grow up with your dad? Was he around?

1:24:14 Guest No.

1:24:15 Drew Steven Tyler was not around when you were a little girl.

1:24:18 Guest No.

1:24:18 Drew Or even a medium sized girl.

1:24:21 Guest Not until I was about 16 was he really in my life.

1:24:24 Drew Came back into your life at that point. Did you resent him? Did you have feelings?

1:24:28 Guest Oh, yeah.

1:24:29 Drew And you guys have worked that out, you got past that.

1:24:31 Guest It was hard because when you're 16, you're still at that kind of rebelling phase and you're trying to grow into who you are going to become. And so it took a while, but he was real forceful about being in my life. And I mean, I'm thankful for it now. I'm glad that it happened then.

1:24:47 Drew Did you always grow up knowing that the least he was around Smith?

1:24:51 Guest Yeah, no, I mean, he was around. He'd come around, you know, Christmas and holidays and birthdays and I'd go out to his shows, but he wasn't there like dad every day, you know.

1:25:00 Drew Did you have another dad that was there?

1:25:02 Guest No, I wish I had.

1:25:04 Drew So it was sort of real part-time dad growing up?

1:25:07 Guest Yeah.

1:25:08 Adam How old are you now?

1:25:10 Guest I'll be 25 next month. Okay, lots of therapy.

1:25:14 Drew Good, yeah, so anyway, but you patched things up.

1:25:18 Guest Yeah.

1:25:18 Drew And you're at an Aerosmith show.

1:25:20 Guest And we'd been making the joke all day that, you know, well, we got there and I told him, I was like, dad, you know, we might get married tonight because we were engaged and we were supposed to get married in January.

1:25:30 Adam In January, upcoming January.

1:25:31 Guest Yeah, and it was just getting stressful. And I mean, we're still going to have the ceremony in January for the families. But we just kind of, I always thought that my, I was going to elope, even as a young child, I thought I'd elope, whatever. So we got there and we, I was like, dad, you know, we might go off and get married tonight after the show. And we had been making a joke all day that we were going to just bum rush the stage with the priest and get married on stage, you know, and he said that to my dad. My dad was like, that's a great idea. So about 15 minutes before the show, they called and got a priest and halfway through the show, he came down, talked to us. And then right between crying and walk this way, the last song, we came out on stage and got married in front of 20,000 people.

1:26:13 Adam I'm just thinking about the priest too. Only in Vegas.

1:26:15 Guest He was so wacky. He was like this little Italian, like mobster.

1:26:21 Guest Judge.

1:26:21 Guest Yeah. It was very bizarre, but.

1:26:25 Guest I think he said he was just at home or whatever and he got the call, he was watching TV or something with his kids. And he just gets this call, hey, you need to be down at the arena and marry a couple of kids on stage.

1:26:36 Drew Was it Thomas and Mac or where was it?

1:26:38 Guest The MGM arena.

1:26:39 Drew MGM?

1:26:41 Guest I think one of the NSYNC guys was there too.

1:26:43 Guest Yeah, I think Lance Bass was there too.

1:26:45 Guest Lance Bass.

1:26:46 Drew Hey.

1:26:47 Guest So we had Aerosmith play at our wedding.

1:26:48 Guest Yeah, that's basically what we're getting to.

1:26:52 Drew Hey, do they, this is somewhat related, not to marriage, but is your dad, is he doing Rats in the Cellar and Toys in the Attic in the set? Is that those songs?

1:27:01 Guest They switch it up, I don't.

1:27:03 Drew Tell them get the Toys in the Attic in there.

1:27:05 Guest Well, they're coming out with a blues album, so they're doing like a lot of blues songs in there.

1:27:09 Drew I like to hear that, Rats in the Cellar and Toys in the Attic. Dad's Steven Tyler, one of a very unique breed. I don't know. He seems nutty and sane at the same time. Is he in real life? What is he like?

1:27:29 Guest He's just a big kid, and he's very smart when it comes to his business and his empire. But he looks at everything like, you know, he has a young mentality.

1:27:41 Drew Yeah.

1:27:41 Adam That's what keeps him. That's the goofy piece you're picking up on.

1:27:46 Drew Yeah.

1:27:47 Guest You know what he loves? Pop a roach.

1:27:49 Drew Oh really? Big pop a roach man.

1:27:51 Guest You're making that up.

1:27:53 Adam Yeah, she is.

1:27:53 Caller I just like making that up.

1:27:55 Guest She's trying to...

1:27:57 Drew I'm just saying, next time you talk to him, tell him to play some Toys in the Attic.

1:28:00 Adam Adam says, Toys in the Attic. I love that song.

1:28:03 Drew It doesn't get played on the radio enough, you know?

1:28:05 Guest I think they do play that one.

1:28:06 Drew Good. Thank you. They're gonna be playing out here anytime soon?

1:28:10 Guest They just played and they added like 25 more shows. They're playing with Kiss.

1:28:14 Drew Oh, I see that.

1:28:16 Adam Britney?

1:28:17 Drew Oh, Gene Simmons is such a delight. Oh, cause they seem just like a colossal prick.

1:28:25 Guest Wait, do you know what they do though? They stand, you know how most bands after the show go back into their dressing room, take showers? Kiss, they stand outside of their dressing room and wait for chicks to come by in their full makeup and just kind of patrol.

1:28:37 Adam They're not young guys anymore.

1:28:38 Guest Oh, no, their skin is hanging off them. There's craters in their faces. Oh, how dare you say more. And they like juice up their chest hair. They're like, yay, we love you.

1:28:49 Drew Gene Simmons just seems like one of the bigger colossal narcissist a-holes on the planet, really.

1:28:55 Guest They love blondes.

1:28:56 Drew Never met him, I just- Just hear him talk.

1:28:58 Guest Just go straight to the blondes.

1:28:59 Adam Yeah, that's Dr. Brittany.

1:29:01 Drew That's Dr. Brittany. Who do you think bigger a-holes, a kiss or chumbawamba?

1:29:05 Adam Ooh, different ways, for different reasons.

1:29:07 Drew But they both, like, first off, thank God chumbawamba's just died a thousand deaths and is a million times gone and turned to dust. Those a-hole pranks, I couldn't wait for them to go away. God, I love it when a band comes in here all full of their own stink. Five years, eight years ago, three years ago, and then they just go. Remember at the drive-in? Is that at the drive-in? We hate it. Yes, yes. Thank God they're gone. Talentless a-holes. Here's the point though. Chumbawamba, biggest a-holes in one genre. Kiss, probably biggest in another, right?

1:29:38 Adam In their own, yes.

1:29:40 Drew When is kiss gonna go away?

1:29:42 Guest They're like Twinkies, they never go away.

1:29:44 Drew Britney? I know, they're never good.

1:29:46 Adam Britney's 20, what's up?

1:29:49 Caller Hey, I was wondering if it's normal for a 20-year-old not to have an orgasm?

1:29:53 Guest Yes.

1:29:54 Adam Yes, that is very normal.

1:29:56 Caller How come? Why?

1:29:58 Adam Well, no one's really done that research to figure that out. In fact, we're sort of in denial about it as a country. Like, well, men and women are the same, the same.

1:30:05 Guest No way.

1:30:05 Adam Except women don't seem to have...

1:30:08 Caller Everyone I talk to has them when they have sex and I don't.

1:30:11 Adam No, they don't.

1:30:12 Guest Well, do you have orgasms from when you pleasure yourself?

1:30:16 Caller Yes.

1:30:17 Guest Well, you know...

1:30:17 Adam That's actually ahead of the curve, Brittany. Most 20-year-olds can't even do that.

1:30:20 Guest Really?

1:30:21 Adam Not most, but many.

1:30:22 Guest Isn't it like 75% of women, though, can't have an orgasm from actual penetration?

1:30:26 Adam Correct.

1:30:27 Drew No, it's over 100%.

1:30:28 Adam It's probably more like 60%.

1:30:29 Drew I mean, the data I've taken is well over 100%. Like, if I got one chick off through having sex, I would be at zero, and that far past.

1:30:40 Adam Yeah, most women do not have orgasms within intercourse, most women, ever. No, you have it during oral sex, another thing.

1:30:49 Drew What about during oral sex, yeah? You're getting there.

1:30:54 Adam You can masturbate. It'll get better as you age.

1:30:56 Guest Like, I have different orgasms. Yeah, like a different one, it's like a different feeling from, say, oral sex, and then it's a different one when I'm by myself, and then it's a different one.

1:31:05 Adam With intercourse.

1:31:06 Guest Yeah.

1:31:06 Drew Oh, nice. You got that to shoot. I got the same. I wouldn't even know where I was or who I was with. I wouldn't know. It's always the same one, except for when I'm camping. That's a good one. Yeah, maybe it's the lucky lager. The smell of the s'mores. You know, a little extra grip on the hand for the s'more.

1:31:25 Adam The s'more, yeah.

1:31:30 Drew Oh, shut up. You jackass. How dare you? Someone comes up, has a question about your book. You jump all over.

1:31:35 Adam I didn't know that's when you're going to. That's fine. Paul, 23. Paul.

1:31:39 Caller Yeah.

1:31:40 Adam Paul. Yeah, what's up?

1:31:41 Caller How's it going?

1:31:42 Caller Hey, I'm watching Family Guy right now.

1:31:43 Caller And Adam, you're the Grim Reaper.

1:31:45 Drew Oh, it's my Grim Reaper Family Guy episode.

1:31:47 Caller I just recognize your voice.

1:31:49 Caller Also, I got a Germany or Florida.

1:31:51 Drew Oh, we don't have time. Sorry, Paul.

1:31:54 Caller Are you kidding?

1:31:55 Drew No, sorry there, buddy.

1:31:56 Caller Can I have a quick question for Dr. Drew?

1:32:02 Drew I listen. I went to Paul cause Paul was gonna tell me I was on the Family Guy tonight, which I didn't know about, but I'll go watch it when I get home. And by the way, if anyone hasn't seen the Family Guy, this is a funny show.

1:32:13 Adam It's on Cartoon Network now.

1:32:14 Drew Yeah.

1:32:15 Adam And I gotta watch it like three times and then you're in and there's no getting out.

1:32:19 Drew I play the Grim Reaper in a couple of episodes and I think one must be on tonight and we gotta take a break. So we'll be right back.

1:32:27 Caller Alright guys, here's the deal.

1:32:28 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

1:32:32 Caller One call is all you need to make.

1:32:33 Caller Call the Dateline. 877-889-DATE.

1:32:37 Caller Call the Dateline.

1:32:46 Caller Well, that's it. That's the week.

1:32:51 Drew Is that the week?

1:32:52 Adam That's the week. It's Thursday.

1:32:53 Drew Next week, Adam Rodriguez, you know, from CSI will be in here in Miami. Puddle of Mud, Pink, Kathy Griffin, who I like to call Red.

1:33:03 Guest I love Kathy Griffin.

1:33:04 Drew Got them clown pubes. I've been there. Dynamite Lady. I'll bring that up. And a dear, dear, dear friend. And Pink, ball of fun too. Met her backstage somewhere and wanted to come on the show, so good. David, Mia, God bless you.

1:33:19 Guest Thanks you guys. Thank you.

1:33:22 Drew Many years of happiness and success.

1:33:23 Guest Glad to come back.

1:33:24 Drew Papa Roach. When the new CD comes out in March, April, you guys come back with a nice fat plug and a nice plus size plug. You're calling me fat now? Plus size plug.

1:33:34 Guest Plus size model's got to have a plus size rocker.

1:33:36 Drew Orange Show Fairgrounds for the Smokeout this Saturday. I want to thank Tara and I'll call my Tara and Brian and Chris and Lauren and Ann and Ken and Anderson. Until next time, Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying, Greg Patterson, Mahalo.

1:33:57 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Thursday, November 13, 2003