Monday, September 26, 2005

0:57🔗 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Sexually-oriented content.

1:07🔗 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:08🔗 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:13🔗 Voiceover This is Loveline.

1:17🔗 Adam With Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist. Emily Proctor is here tonight from CSI Miami. The juggernaut known as the CSI Miami and all the crime stuff.

1:42🔗 What is going on?

1:45🔗 Emily Procter I don't know. I've decided.

1:47🔗 Adam Hold on. You better pull the mic toward you.

1:51🔗 Emily Procter Is that better?

1:52🔗 Adam It's really the beauty of radio. I will tell you the beauty of radio, Emily.

1:55🔗 Drew Many things are the beauty of radio.

1:56🔗 Adam I'll tell you one of the most beautiful, fundamental, the purest thing about radio is every single night the mic sits three feet away from whoever the guest is. And every single night they speak into it when it's three feet away from them because I don't think people think you can monkey with the mic.

2:14🔗 Drew So you see, what he's saying is, it's comforting.

2:16🔗 Adam It's not your fault. Well, here's the whole thing about radio. There is a certain stupidity level that you can hang your hat on and you know what you're going to get.

2:27🔗 Drew You can anticipate it.

2:28🔗 Adam What you don't want is somebody acting like a retard four days out of the week and then fifth day of the week they're Einstein, not radio. Radio, seven day a week, retard.

2:36🔗 Drew You also don't want some smart ass fixing everything. That's uncomfortable.

2:39🔗 Emily Procter Well, and also in my defense, it's very expensive looking. I didn't want to touch it.

2:43🔗 Drew No, that's the point.

2:46🔗 Emily Procter I don't think I can afford to fix it if I break it.

2:47🔗 Drew We're making the point.

2:48🔗 Adam That mic and stand cost a bundle and that's $1971 too. So I mean, you got to figure 35 years later, this thing was almost $200 in 1971. So at least Gallic Ass was 40 cents. You do the math.

3:02🔗 Emily Procter And it took you three hours to get it. How long did it take to get the microphone?

3:05🔗 Adam I was, oh my god, I don't even know.

3:09🔗 Drew What happened to you? You were just running in here from what?

3:12🔗 Adam I'm frazzled because tonight on Too Late with Adam Corolla, Comedy Central, 12 o'clock midnight, Steve Ho.

3:19🔗 Drew Oh boy.

3:20🔗 Adam One of the jackass guys, Steve Ho. He got loaded out of his mind. He blacked out and he started to attack me. I mean, he jumped on me and started to put his foot through a glass table. Well, it depends. Feeling raw boo, is that second or is it in the underpants?

3:39🔗 Drew Was he, usually when he's-

3:41🔗 Emily Procter Retro is second.

3:42🔗 Drew Well, when he begins that kind of an attack, it's usually intent to sort of attack with his genitalia.

3:46🔗 Adam Well, his whole body is genitalia. I look at all the whole, the entire male body is genitalia.

3:52🔗 Drew That's not a blackout. That's an acutely agitated state.

3:55🔗 Adam Oh really?

3:55🔗 Drew Drugs and stuff.

3:56🔗 Adam I am telling you, we had to stop the show, that we have a glass coffee table that he attempted to put his hand through and he ended up he ended up shattering it with his foot by putting it through. We had to restrain him, call like EMT guys and drag him out of there and finish the show with no coffee.

4:12🔗 Drew Did you put him in the hospital?

4:13🔗 Adam I have no idea where they put him. I just finished the show without him.

4:16🔗 Drew Did any of them make the show?

4:17🔗 Emily Procter I don't think that yours is a glass coffee. I'm sorry, Marcus.

4:21🔗 Drew No, no, this is another engineer. Another engineer. This is the site you've seen, a member of Anderson?

4:25🔗 Adam Anderson, yes. Yes, it all made the show. So you can enjoy that. You can enjoy Steve-O tonight. Sorry, Emily.

4:32🔗 Emily Procter I was just going to say, I don't know that your crowd is a glass coffee table kind of a crowd, isn't it?

4:38🔗 Drew Good point.

4:38🔗 Maybe a bean bag?

4:39🔗 Drew Yeah, change your desk.

4:40🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah, I think it's a couple of cinder blocks and a pine plank.

4:45🔗 Yeah, or egg crepe.

4:46🔗 Adam Yeah, egg crepe.

4:48🔗 Drew Stone.

4:48🔗 Adam You know what I like about Emily? Emily looks like an Emily. She sounds like an Emily. She looks like an Emily. She is an Emily.

4:56🔗 Drew Through and through.

4:56🔗 Adam And it's easy to remember her name. You don't have to glance down and pick up Emily. It's Emily.

5:01🔗 Drew It's Emily.

5:02🔗 Adam People, parents are smart who name their kids names and where they look. And that's, you know, Drew, we were talking about this a couple of weeks ago, which is everybody picks the kid's name out six months in advance. At least white people do this. You know, they open the book, they start picking out names. You wouldn't give your dog a name before you saw your dog. You have to see your dog and see what it looks like. Is it a fluffy? Is it a Fido? Is it a fur ball? Is it a tigger? You know what I mean? Like, you got to know what that dog is. And then it's like, it's like your parents saw you and said, that's an Emily. You know what I mean?

5:38🔗 Caller Yeah, absolutely.

5:38🔗 Adam That's how you should do it.

5:39🔗 Caller It's a fly gray.

5:40🔗 Adam That's how you should do it. And by the way, does the kid need a name for the first four months of life?

5:47🔗 Emily Procter I once knew this family who the father decided it was a good idea to let the children name themselves when they roll.

5:53🔗 Drew That's a special kind of name.

5:56🔗 Emily Procter Yeah, there was one who named herself Princess because why wouldn't you? And then the boy named himself Ben.

6:04🔗 Drew Ben?

6:05🔗 Emily Procter Just Ben.

6:05🔗 Drew There was a sane one in the group.

6:06🔗 Adam I would have after with my dad went with Hitler.

6:10🔗 Drew Mussolini.

6:11🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, that's my middle name. Hitler, Mussolini, Schwarz.

6:14🔗 Stalin, Stalin, Schwarz.

6:16🔗 Emily Procter Hitler, Mussolini, Stalin, Schwarz.

6:19🔗 Adam Hyphenated Stalin, Schwarz. Hey, I'm not going to stop there.

6:22🔗 Drew I cannot get over the Stevo thing. First of all, A, I feel like I should go get him and treat him because, you know what I mean, that is center of me.

6:28🔗 Adam Forget about getting him, dart him and treat him.

6:30🔗 Drew We can we can deal with that.

6:32🔗 Caller A, B.

6:33🔗 Emily Procter Why is it that when you rub your balls while you're jerking off that it feels so much better?

6:38🔗 Drew There he is. Speaking of Stevo. Was he intending to attack you or was he just going to go berserk and you happened to be on the line of fire?

6:45🔗 Adam Steve was in a crazy guess.

6:48🔗 Drew He went berserk.

6:50🔗 Emily Procter What prompted him?

6:54🔗 Adam Just he was, I've seen many guys, I've been around guys that were blasted out of their mind and the guys that are blasted out of their mind have these sort of impulses of wanting to do things. And I don't know if it's a blackout state or not, but they say things like we have to go to Mexico and get those people out. And so they get up and they start moving for the door. And you try to restrain them and you say, no, no, no, no, no, relax, just sit down. You're drunk. And then they start scuffling with you. And the next thing you know, they're pushing on you. And then they're sort of, here's what they're doing. They're doing exactly what you don't want them to do. That's what certain guys do when they're drunk. Women don't do that. You'll be like, listen buddy, give me the keys, let you know. You're not the boss of me. And you're like, listen buddy, I'm just, I'm worried about you. I don't, the cops are outside. I don't want you going outside. You're going to get arra- You have, you're on probation. Get out of my way.

7:55🔗 Drew If you remember a Fletch from Pennywise, it's the same thing. Remember? We were like, hey, we don't want to go to Poopoo City. Fletch can relax.

8:01🔗 Adam And then it's a crazy impulse that drunken guys have that when they figure out you're trying to get them not to do something, even if that not to do something, now they act like that not to do something is swindle them out of $10,000 cash when it's really stopped them from being beaten by law, law officials or from destroying something or destroying their car or being arrested or having their wife, you know, divorce them, whatever bad, drowned in their own vomit, whatever it is you're trying to do, he starts punching on you and he wasn't punching on me. He was sort of charging me and bullying me for hours in my chair and the chair was starting to tip backwards and we're up on the platform on the platform. And eventually he sort of flew over me and flew into some some furniture. And then when he got up right, he broke the glass coffee table and shattered that and then he got cut up and then he had to be sort of dragged out of there.

8:55🔗 Drew Did a bunch of people have to grab him?

8:56🔗 Adam Well, at a certain point, he needed to be escorted, paramedics and whoever. No, he didn't, he wasn't, he wasn't throwing fists. He was just, you know, sort of obliterated out of his mind. It's just that thing where guys do have had it a thousand times. Where like I'm explaining to people, you know, you give them, you give them this one. Maintain. Dude, dude, dude, maintain.

9:22🔗 Dude, you don't understand.

9:24🔗 Adam You, those are cops out there. You know, or that dude will kick your ass or whatever. No, if you get another 502, you will never get your license back. You know, all these things and all that, all that does is make them want to pile head forward even more. It's like it's like there's some full back that's bursting through the line. And you getting in the way is like it's just a defender trying to stop them from going into the goal.

9:47🔗 Drew Oh, they just would have lowered their head and pile it out.

9:48🔗 Emily Procter Right, right, right.

9:50🔗 Adam I wish I had like, this is why I'm a great drunk because I know I'm drunk.

9:55🔗 Emily Procter You know what I mean?

9:56🔗 Adam I know I'm loaded. I remember the part about me getting drunk and when someone says to me, buddy, you're loaded. Now you need to, I'm like, all right. It's hard to argue with you. I remember drinking the bottle of Kamchatka. Chicks for the most part are pretty good about that too.

10:11🔗 Emily Procter They just get weepy.

10:12🔗 Adam They get weepy.

10:13🔗 Emily Procter They just get really sad.

10:14🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah. They get a little euphoric and then they bottom out and they start to talk and smack about their friends. But they don't get into that thing like women insisting on driving like that, that, that thing, that thing where guys, like, it's like, buddy, give me the keys. I just, and a thing where he's just arguing and fine. And then, then there's that point where you're like, good, get in the car, go kill yourself.

10:38🔗 Emily Procter Right.

10:38🔗 Adam Good. I hope you hit, I hope you hit an oak tree and burst into flames, you SOB. Go. You know.

10:45🔗 Emily Procter Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

10:45🔗 Adam Oh, Drew, you must, every single day of your life, that's what you do, right?

10:48🔗 Drew Yeah, pretty much. Pretty much.

10:49🔗 Adam Yeah. And that's just with the wife.

10:51🔗 Drew No. It's, well, yeah, but, no, no.

10:54🔗 Adam Emily, Emily not only looks like an Emily, she looks like a Procter, too. She just, she's-

11:00🔗 Emily Procter Thank God I'm so suitably named.

11:02🔗 Adam Procter's one of those names, sounds like someone who sings in the church. She's a Procter.

11:06🔗 Drew Yeah. Well, John Procter from the Crucible, you know.

11:08🔗 Adam Oh, maybe that's what I'm thinking about.

11:10🔗 Drew I think it is.

11:11🔗 Adam I think Monday's 10 o'clock, by the way, CSI Miami. There's part of me doesn't, we don't have to plug the show, do we?

11:18🔗 Drew No, let's never mention it again. We do have to plug the iPod thing though.

11:20🔗 Adam We do.

11:21🔗 Drew Yeah. Tonight and every night this week, we're giving away an iPod Nano, and was it Christie last night?

11:26🔗 Adam Yeah.

11:26🔗 Drew I guarantee you, you're going to freak, you're going to love this thing. This is a crazy piece of technology. Tiny thing about the size of a little bit like two-

11:34🔗 Emily Procter I saw it. I'm so jealous.

11:36🔗 Caller It's teeny, teeny.

11:37🔗 Drew It's like two shuffles basically, side by side. Anyway, hold on.

11:41🔗 Adam It's like two shuffles?

11:42🔗 Drew Yeah. It's like if you put two shuffles together, it's about the size of a little bit of something.

11:45🔗 Emily Procter How much memory does it have?

11:46🔗 Adam No. It's like two credit cards, right? Isn't it a nano?

11:49🔗 Drew That way. Yeah. It's like two credit cards.

11:50🔗 Adam Yeah. It's small.

11:51🔗 Drew Well, that's why I said credit cards.

11:52🔗 Adam Well, Drew, don't make something five times as big. A shuffle is bigger than a nano, isn't it?

11:57🔗 Drew It's a little thicker, yeah.

11:58🔗 Emily Procter Now, you swear you don't do this when you're drunk. You just do it when you're sober.

12:01🔗 Drew The way he talks to me? Oh no, he does it when he's sober and drunk. Whatever, that's the way he talks to me.

12:06🔗 Emily Procter Adam's like, I'm not belligerent.

12:08🔗 Caller All you gotta do is listen.

12:09🔗 Drew She is Emily Procter.

12:11🔗 Adam Hold on a second, Emily. You gotta understand, let me just say this. A nano is quite a bit smaller than a, oh no, it's not small. Well.

12:21🔗 Drew It's a little, it's like two together in terms of. All right, I should apologize because I was thinking of the small iPod, not the shuffle.

12:28🔗 Adam There's too many goddamn iPods now.

12:30🔗 Drew Well, this is the only one you're gonna need. Anyway, when we play, when you hear the bumper played by White Stripes, it'll be My Doorbell is the song. When you hear it coming out of commercials, into the show, you'll hear My Doorbell be the first person to get through and say iPod Nano must be over the 18 years of age, you're also gonna get a free gift certificate from iTunes for 10 free downloads.

12:50🔗 Adam So here's the thing, if you did the water displacement test between an iPod shuffle and an iPod Nano, we'll probably displace about the same amount of water.

13:01🔗 Drew We need about one and a half shuffles per Nano.

13:03🔗 Adam But this thing is like a home computer where the shuffle just holds 99 songs and it shuffles about.

13:08🔗 Drew The Nano is 25,000 pictures, a thousand songs, crazy.

13:11🔗 Adam Crazy. Crazy. And you realize more computing ability in that shuffle in Nano, or in the Nano, than was in the first Apollo spacecraft.

13:24🔗 Drew You gotta easily. Easily. You gotta explain to the 1780s man on your tour show about the Nano.

13:29🔗 Emily Procter It's important. Yeah.

13:31🔗 Adam It's incredible. I mean it really is incredible when you think that there's more in an iPod than there was technologically than goddess to the moon.

13:38🔗 Drew I don't think young people appreciate the rooms that computers would take up. Yes. With the tape.

13:44🔗 Emily Procter I remember the picture of that room, that giant sort of blue-gray steel computer.

13:48🔗 Caller It just went from real to real tape. Reached real tape, going zzzz.

13:52🔗 Adam It would always go forward and backward.

13:54🔗 Emily Procter And the one little man in a coat and he's like, Yeah.

13:57🔗 Drew A lot of air conditioning.

13:58🔗 Adam Yeah. My dad's going to buy one of those soon, by the way. Well, you know, my dad's always 60 years behind technologically.

14:05🔗 Drew So he needs one.

14:05🔗 Emily Procter I'm a Luddite too.

14:07🔗 Adam You are?

14:07🔗 Emily Procter Terrible, yeah.

14:08🔗 Adam Yeah, but you have a computer, right?

14:10🔗 Emily Procter Yes.

14:12🔗 Drew Every Procter does. How dare you?

14:13🔗 Adam Let me say this, too, about stuff. I was thinking about the old computers and about how they were that creepy sort of flesh color.

14:20🔗 Drew Yeah.

14:20🔗 Adam And then I think about those old, the first generation of cell phones.

14:23🔗 Drew Yeah.

14:23🔗 Adam And they were that creepy flesh color. They were huge.

14:26🔗 Drew Yeah.

14:27🔗 Adam It was really like just was like talking in a shack shoe.

14:30🔗 Drew What if you remember what it was? Telephones were routinely that color.

14:33🔗 Adam Yeah. And here's all I'm saying. Electronic equipment looks good in a nice brushed aluminum and it looks good in a nice charcoal gray or an anthracite or black. But the weird fleshy color, it looks like you're holding a prosthetic limb up your head and it's weird.

14:49🔗 Drew What were they thinking?

14:50🔗 Adam I don't know. Like they must have been thinking, well, the shoe, which is the size, I mean, I'm sorry, the phone, which is the size of a shoe box, will make it pay. So when you're holding against your head, no one will see.

15:01🔗 Drew They won't see it. Yeah. Yeah.

15:02🔗 Adam Instead, it just looks like you have a crazy growth coming out of the side of your head.

15:06🔗 Drew But the telephones were that color, too. So even the real, the dial phone.

15:11🔗 Adam Yes. Like, like here's the thing. Prosthetic limbs should be flesh color.

15:16🔗 Drew That's it.

15:17🔗 Adam Other than that, maybe you could paint the outside of your house sort of off-white or something like that. But making electronics equipment into that is weird.

15:25🔗 Drew Bad idea.

15:26🔗 Adam Horrible idea. Yes. Brian, what the hell? In the seventies, remember everything was avocado green and burnt orange. What the hell were we thinking?

15:36🔗 Drew Well, at least it's not bad anymore.

15:38🔗 Adam Yeah. But still flesh, flesh color worse.

15:41🔗 Drew We got out of it fast.

15:42🔗 Adam Yeah. Brian.

15:43🔗 Yes, sir.

15:44🔗 Adam You know, that's why, that's why the blacks are lucky. It's not flesh color for them. Do you know what I mean?

15:49🔗 Drew Just another reason that you need to become black.

15:51🔗 Adam It's creepy for the white guy to hold that weird flesh color phone up. For a black guy, it's just a weird, it's just, it's just off-white.

15:56🔗 Drew Marcus says do not leave out your Mexican brother.

15:58🔗 Adam Oh, Mexican brother, yeah, that's confusing. Confusing, caught in between as usual. You know, I never thought about flesh tone not applying to black people. No flesh tone for them.

16:11🔗 Drew In fact, how's racist just call it flesh tone?

16:13🔗 Adam It is.

16:14🔗 Caller It's not flesh tone. It's not flesh, it's our flesh. It's for white guys.

16:16🔗 Adam We should call it something else.

16:17🔗 Caller We should call it cracker.

16:19🔗 Adam Hunky tone, cracker tone. Cracker tone, that's not bad.

16:23🔗 Drew It's seriously racist.

16:24🔗 Adam It is. It's like this is universal color flesh. Yeah, there's probably more people on this planet who are the color of...

16:31🔗 Drew I'm outraged.

16:32🔗 Adam I am. Get on the phone.

16:35🔗 Emily Procter Is now a good time for me to say I have missed y'all?

16:39🔗 Adam Yeah, it's always a good time to say that. More people on the planet who aren't the color of the creepy flesh-tone phone than there are, right?

16:48🔗 Drew Of course, of the crazy, narcissistic, racist, white-man attitude.

16:51🔗 Adam That's right. I hate the man. I hate all white people. And I include myself in that match. I'll tell you. You have all of Asia, all the Chinese people, all the Latin people, all the African people. No one is that color, that phone, but us. But yet it is called flesh-tone. How dare we? Although we did invent it. Here's the thing. Africa, when you invent something, then you get to pick a color. Same with you, Maxco.

17:14🔗 Emily Procter Didn't Africa invent people?

17:19🔗 Adam Yeah, too shamed. But still, if you actually ever...

17:22🔗 If you guys actually invent anything, call us and then you can name it after you.

17:27🔗 Adam That's the thing. All right?

17:29🔗 Drew Emily with the zingers.

17:30🔗 Adam That was tough. But it is true. You do have to invent the phone. We did invent the phone. You got to give us credit for that. And to get back, whoever the color, who invents the thing is, they get to pick it. All right, now I'm back on the side of the white guy.

17:45🔗 For Brian.

17:46🔗 Yes, sir.

17:47🔗 Drew Brian, yes, sir.

17:47🔗 Adam 21, what's up?

17:49🔗 I'm from St. Louis, Missouri. I just recently returned from Iraq. I had the antirex vaccine. I heard Dr. Drew talking about it currently my time, but I guess it was the night before.

18:02🔗 Drew Ooh, I don't think I've talked about that in a long time, so I wonder if that was in a replay of some time.

18:06🔗 Adam Yes, you've not, no, no, no, no. Last night we had What's-Her-Name babbling on about...

18:13🔗 Drew Yeah, NCSI.

18:15🔗 Adam Yeah, right, right.

18:16🔗 Drew We were talking about Cipro and anthrax. We did talk about, no, I was talking about...

18:20🔗 Adam Polyparot.

18:21🔗 Drew And strangely, I was talking about circumcision being equivalent to a vaccine against HIV.

18:28🔗 Adam But she was talking about Cipro and anthrax and Cipro and them sending stuff back.

18:34🔗 Drew In New Orleans, anyway, whatever.

18:36🔗 Adam Sounds like nonsense.

18:37🔗 Drew See, we were talking about, yes, we were talking about the anthrax a little bit. Yeah, so...

18:40🔗 Adam The question is, Brian.

18:42🔗 Well, I received the anthrax vaccine before going to Iraq.

18:46🔗 Right.

18:47🔗 While I was stationed there, and since then, I've had boils on my body, which have only gotten worse. And research on the internet says that seems to be a typical result of the vaccine. Really? With military people who were there. But also, I was curious about leishmaniasis, if you know anything about that.

19:08🔗 Drew Well, leishmania is usually an ulcerating lesion. It's not just the boils, it ulcerates. And leishmania, you get these tropical illnesses, and it's a nice parasite illness.

19:21🔗 Adam Sounds like the world's worst Broadway show. Leishmania.

19:24🔗 Emily Procter Or an S&M.

19:25🔗 Adam Tommy Tune, Starrs.

19:28🔗 Drew Brian, that's something dermatologists will be able to diagnose for you. But recurrent boils, something called recurrent ferunculosis. I was not aware it was associated with the anthrax vaccine. But it makes some sense, because obviously a vaccine can change your immune function and change the sort of makeup of the skin bacteria. I would think more that also, you know, traveling a lot, being exposed to large numbers of people in concentrated environments that also could give you some bugs that could cause more likely to cause follicular infections than Brian.

19:56🔗 Adam What did you do over there?

19:59🔗 I was a combat lifesaver and an M249 gunner.

20:03🔗 Adam What's the M249?

20:05🔗 The squad automatic weapon, 5.56 millimeters, 600 rounds a minute, automatic machine gun.

20:15🔗 Adam Five point, you say 5.5 millimeter?

20:18🔗 5.56. Yes, sir.

20:21🔗 Adam Okay, well, I'm just gonna go ahead and round down to 5.5.

20:23🔗 Drew How was it over there?

20:26🔗 Very disturbing.

20:27🔗 Drew Why?

20:28🔗 Well, I didn't want to, I know how Adam especially doesn't like anyone or beat around the bush and bring up extra topics, but mentally, physically, all of that, it just got to me. And I have many problems nowadays.

20:42🔗 Drew Combat wise, combat fatigue.

20:45🔗 Between nightmares, every night, sleeping a half an hour and waking up.

20:51🔗 Drew So it's really every true.

20:52🔗 Every half an hour to an addiction to alcohol that I never had before. I was so.

21:00🔗 Adam Yeah.

21:00🔗 Drew All right. So Brian, this is post-traumatic stress disorder.

21:02🔗 Yeah.

21:03🔗 Adam Why not?

21:04🔗 Drew Yeah.

21:04🔗 Adam Hey, Brian.

21:05🔗 Yes, sir.

21:06🔗 Adam He says 5.5 millimeter.

21:10🔗 Drew Yes.

21:10🔗 Rounding down. Yes, sir.

21:12🔗 Adam Oh, it's smaller than a nine millimeter round?

21:16🔗 Yes, sir. But the muzzle velocity of the weapon causes a much greater amount of damage.

21:22🔗 Drew High velocity injury.

21:24🔗 Adam So it's just about taking small bits and spraying them all over the place and injuring people and getting them out of commission.

21:31🔗 Not necessarily. Me and a lot of buddies that I saw die in action didn't fire because we didn't want to hurt anybody who was innocent.

21:41🔗 Adam Right. I'm just, well, thank you. I just mean theoretically the thing. It's such a small round.

21:46🔗 Yeah. That's the large amounts of tiny rounds that move at a exactly high velocity.

21:51🔗 Drew And so that's the PTSD from all that trauma and action, yeah.

21:58🔗 Have you talked? The military nor the Veterans Affairs Hospital wants to do anything about that.

22:05🔗 Drew What do you mean? If you go in there, I mean, they specialize. They've got people that are used to treating combat related stress phenomena.

22:12🔗 Right, but they don't consider from the screening they did that this is any type of problem like that, which...

22:20🔗 Adam Well, listen. Brian, why don't you go back and talk to somebody and tell them how you're feeling?

22:28🔗 Drew Yeah, ask to talk to a psychiatrist. If you're getting alcohol out of control, you can always avail yourself of 12-step programs. Show up at AA. A lot of people with addiction, alcoholism have PTSD. It's not very few. You're gonna find actually, well, I guess these days there'll be a growing number of people with combat-related PTSD.

22:43🔗 Emily Procter Well, and I would imagine, I mean, even if it was something that you wanted to do or decided to do, there isn't any way around the fact that what you've been through is very traumatic and it will take time, I think, for you to feel like yourself or maybe even feel like you can ask someone to help.

23:01🔗 Drew And there is medication for this too. They should be able to help them.

23:03🔗 Adam Let's take a quick question for Emily. Devon?

23:06🔗 Hello?

23:07🔗 Emily Procter You're 22?

23:08🔗 Hi, oh, this is awesome. Adam, you're the coolest guy ever.

23:13🔗 Adam Oh, thanks.

23:14🔗 I know I have a question about Emily, but I just wanted to say that I've been looking at Loveline throughout high school and college and you guys didn't get me through law school and I just thank you for every minute you guys are on the air.

23:23🔗 Adam Thanks.

23:24🔗 Drew Where do you go to college?

23:25🔗 I went to college at Cal Poly, San Francisco.

23:29🔗 Drew And now he's up in San Francisco.

23:30🔗 Adam Yeah, Cal Poly, are they broncos?

23:34🔗 Drew Are they gauchos or something?

23:35🔗 No, mustangs.

23:36🔗 Adam Mustangs, I see the... You know, I got recruited to play football there out of high school.

23:41🔗 Oh, really?

23:41🔗 Adam Cool.

23:42🔗 Drew Your family would have none of that though.

23:44🔗 Adam I'll show you the letter one day. They considered me a blue chip prospect. Yeah, don't forget it. Yeah, so, so Devon, what's up?

23:52🔗 Yeah, I had a question for Emily. I was wondering if there was any possibility... Hi, I was wondering if there was any possibility that you'd ever reprise your role as Ainsley Hayes on the West Wing, because I know it's probably coming down with the last few, and I was wondering if they had thought about bringing any old cast members back for like a rigging or anything like that.

24:10🔗 Emily Procter Oh, gosh, I was, I was just talking with a different Adam here at the studio about that about 10 minutes ago, because I tell you what, I loved that part, and I loved playing Ainsley so much, you know.

24:24🔗 Drew Emily could be in Ainsley too, but yeah.

24:26🔗 Adam Yeah, and would you, they ever talk to anyone about that?

24:30🔗 Emily Procter Well, they actually came to me last year and asked if I would come back, which I would love to do, but unfortunately, contractually I cannot. But I stay in contact with quite a few people over there.

24:41🔗 Drew That's obviously interesting, you have, we have discussed it before, it seems stupid of them not to, I mean, it's a cross promotional opportunity for their show.

24:50🔗 Adam I look, you know, we run into, thanks Devin for the praise by the way.

24:54🔗 Emily Procter I did want to say thank you. And just, if you are a West Wing fan, I always think it's important to know, I had such a wonderful time working over there and everyone that you watch is as great as you think they are. They're smart, they're kind, they're informed, they're interesting. And I'm just so glad that people like that show.

25:11🔗 Adam Except for Sheen, he's a pompous ass. But he's smart. He's gotta be a low heart. I know, but what?

25:16🔗 Emily Procter He's actually really loves me.

25:17🔗 Adam Really? He's gotta be an exquisite blowhard, though. Yeah.

25:21🔗 Emily Procter He's really not.

25:22🔗 Adam Really?

25:23🔗 Emily Procter He's incredibly genuine. And I think that-

25:26🔗 Adam Genuine blowhard.

25:27🔗 Drew It's a case of point that's very hard for actors to look smart, unless they are. You know what I mean? That's one that you can't play.

25:32🔗 Adam Sheen is probably smart, I'm sure. Blowhard smart. But at least you didn't say they were generous. You didn't say they were generous. You did good.

25:41🔗 Emily Procter No, I just, I think they're bright. I think it's a really nice crowd of bright people. And it was fun for me to be there because no matter who I turned to, you know, crew included, it was a great crowd. And I had some wonderful conversations when I was at work. And in addition to getting to have like a really fun time.

25:58🔗 Adam I know. I just, I could never say nice things about people I worked with in the past.

26:02🔗 Drew Oh, that's true. I'll second that. That's true.

26:06🔗 Adam Drew, you couldn't either.

26:07🔗 Emily Procter I do think it's a rare experience.

26:09🔗 Adam It is. Well, I think that's, I think, you're a nice person and you see things through rose colored glasses. All right. Let's take ourselves a little break. Emily Proctor here tonight from CSI Miami Monday Nights, 10 o'clock. We'll take a quick break. Be right back after this. Yeah, buddy, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Emily Procter is here tonight.

26:48🔗 Drew How's that? Somebody's with laundry.

26:53🔗 Adam I got a receipt. I got a receipt here. I'm only holding it up because, you know, my obsession with computers and phones and things like that.

27:04🔗 Drew Flash colored things.

27:06🔗 Adam Taking the zeros and drawing lines through them diagonally. So it looks like an 8.

27:13🔗 What is that?

27:15🔗 Drew Somebody.

27:16🔗 Adam Those are zeros.

27:17🔗 Drew I know. It's a $5,000 credit card sale.

27:20🔗 Adam Emily Procter is here tonight from CSI, Miami. CBS, Monday Nights, 10 o'clock everybody.

27:28🔗 Drew Is this you?

27:30🔗 Adam Yeah, it's me.

27:31🔗 Emily Procter What did you buy?

27:32🔗 Drew I bought a car. That's awesome.

27:34🔗 Emily Procter For $5,000?

27:35🔗 Drew Maybe it says $50,000 on here.

27:37🔗 Adam Nope, not for that much.

27:40🔗 Drew Well, the $5,000 must have been to hold the car.

27:42🔗 Adam That's right. Megan, nice shot. Just not this coffee into my paper.

27:49🔗 Drew Why does it say Bye Chow on here though? It doesn't say Adam Corolla.

27:52🔗 Adam Well, again, I handle things over the phone. Megan, you're 15?

27:58🔗 Caller Yep.

27:59🔗 Adam What's up, baby doll?

28:03🔗 Caller I've never been able to date a guy my own age. My boyfriends range from 17 to 22.

28:11🔗 Drew You announced that as though you're proud of it.

28:13🔗 Adam Yeah, same with Drew, finally.

28:15🔗 Drew But that's something that suggests there's really a problem.

28:20🔗 Caller Well, my parents are 12 years apart. My dad's 15 and my mom's 38.

28:26🔗 Drew Is that your biological dad?

28:28🔗 Caller Yeah.

28:29🔗 Drew Is he around?

28:30🔗 Caller Yeah.

28:32🔗 Emily Procter Uh-oh.

28:33🔗 Caller Do you wish he weren't?

28:35🔗 Caller Yeah.

28:36🔗 Emily Procter All right.

28:36🔗 Drew Well, that's the deal here.

28:40🔗 Emily Procter Where are you calling from?

28:42🔗 Caller Tracy.

28:44🔗 Drew I'm really imagining her up the poll at Green Acres, you know, clamping into the water.

28:48🔗 Adam Where's Tracy Calvert? Where's that between Matt, California and Sheila, California? Where's Tracy?

28:55🔗 There, Emily.

28:56🔗 Adam Tracy?

28:58🔗 Caller Do you know where Stockton is at?

28:59🔗 Adam Yeah, I do. I wish I didn't, but I do.

29:01🔗 Caller It's like 15 minutes outside of Stockton. Oh, that's so bad. Right after Livermore, but right before Stockton.

29:10🔗 Drew Well, I'm in Livermore.

29:12🔗 Adam It's God's country out there if God had a cat, and they had to put a cat box in it. It would be God's country.

29:17🔗 Drew Let me sort of wrap Megan up here, and this is a nice little package, and that is that dad is an abusive a-hole whom you don't like.

29:24🔗 Adam Really?

29:24🔗 Drew He is 12 years older, and so you've got to find a guy that can make that right.

29:28🔗 Adam Well, how do we know dad's abusive?

29:30🔗 Drew She says she wishes he weren't. He is.

29:33🔗 Adam What's he do? What kind of abuse?

29:36🔗 Caller Mostly physical. A lot of mental too, but a drunk.

29:42🔗 Adam Oh, a drunk. All right.

29:43🔗 Drew So that makes you, that's a source of trauma, and that becomes then attraction as you get your adolescence. And so you're now attracted to guys that sort of fit that mold of the abusive, abandoning, alcoholic, older male, because you've got to make that right what didn't work out with dad.

29:59🔗 Emily Procter And then also a component of that is you don't want conflict, right?

30:04🔗 Drew Well, no, it's something about our brains make the thing with our brains, their brains, all humans, especially women, when dad traumatizes them, that trauma becomes a source of attraction. And they're naturally then attracted to things that fit that model of the person who did the traumatizing.

30:22🔗 Adam That's you chicks.

30:23🔗 Emily Procter That's interesting.

30:24🔗 Adam And people will say, yeah, my dude brain took a good look, a good hard look at the Carollas and said, no thanks.

30:30🔗 Drew Where's the hair?

30:31🔗 Adam I'm moving on to something 1000% different than this.

30:33🔗 Drew Where's my medicine?

30:35🔗 Adam Yes.

30:35🔗 Drew And the fact though is that there's something about, people will make a story out of it and say, well, these people are trying to make good the traumas of the past. But the reality is our brains are just wired in such a way that causes a drive to repeat these things over and over and over again. It's why people continually find abusive partners, get involved in relationships that they are not what they want.

30:54🔗 Emily Procter I'd be curious because I have this sort of like harebrained thought that human beings are actually just really computers that search for answers all day long. I need to get to work, I have to be there by eight, which route should I take? There is traffic. Is this maybe an offshoot of trying to find an answer to that problem, and that's just what humans do? There is a problem with the relationship where, I'm sure you love your father, but the problem is you don't like him because he's not great.

31:24🔗 Adam Well, there is this impulse to resolve and to fix.

31:28🔗 Drew To fix the trauma. To fix things, yes. But you end up choosing the kind of person who perpetrated the trauma in the first place.

31:34🔗 Emily Procter In an attempt to fix it?

31:35🔗 Drew Right, and guess what? It gets perpetrated again.

31:38🔗 Adam But there's also an interesting component to human behavior, which is the following, which is, if you drink a bunch of yoo-hoo when you're nine and vomit, you never want to see yoo-hoo again.

31:51🔗 Emily Procter Because you have the answer to that problem.

31:53🔗 Adam You don't want to master it. Well, but you could make the same argument, and it's the same with being bitten by a dog. Now you're freaked out. Here's the point. A young girl gets bitten by a dog, that girl becomes a woman who's frightened of dogs, oftentimes. But a young girl gets physically abused by her dad, and all of a sudden she's attracted to physically abusive men. And that's the F'd up part about humans. The reality is, is that it'd be nice if they could have a pet later on in life, and not be freaked out by all dogs. And it'd be nice if they learned their lesson with the abusive dad, and were unattracted to guys that were abusive, but it's the other way around.

32:32🔗 Emily Procter So how does Megan find peace about that?

32:34🔗 Drew What treatment? She can try to date a guy her own age, and have a real relationship, and see how that feels.

32:40🔗 Adam Well also, Megan, you have to learn that your identity is not wrapped up in who's attracted to you, and who wants to have sex with you, and who wants to worship you, and then abuse you.

32:52🔗 Drew Focus on your schoolwork. Get out of that. Yeah.

32:55🔗 Emily Procter That's what I was going to say. There's all sorts of, I mean, you sound intelligent, and you sound curious, and you sound interested in getting an answer, and all of those outlets can be fulfilled somewhere else, other than at your house.

33:08🔗 Adam Megan, what are you into? What do you want to do?

33:11🔗 Caller Well, I want to go to college. No, not a junior college.

33:15🔗 Adam Well, nobody wants to go to junior college, sweetie. It's like prison. No one wants to go to prison. It's just a lot of folks end up there.

33:22🔗 Caller Yes. I want to major in music and minor in psychology and music director.

33:27🔗 Drew Focus on that, Megan. Please focus on that. All right.

33:30🔗 Adam Do not worry about that right now.

33:31🔗 Drew And realize, learn to read your attractions. If you're super attracted, bad idea. It will lead to pain and chaos.

33:37🔗 Adam Do not get pregnant.

33:39🔗 Drew Please.

33:40🔗 Adam That is number one on your list of things to do.

33:42🔗 Drew That's so funny. Adam, how dare you?

33:43🔗 Adam I know.

33:44🔗 Emily Procter Well, and maybe as the only girl here, I would say, I look forward to seeing what you do. I'm sure it will be great.

33:49🔗 Drew Right. Absolutely. Now, the other thing that when we were talking about this last night, the women, when they're raped, will become hypersexual and can't understand why. They'll start dating multiple partners after the rape. And even though aversive to sexuality, feeling bad and dirty and guilty, will continually compulsively do it.

34:04🔗 Emily Procter And that's sort of Jenna James in sort of a way.

34:06🔗 Drew Sort of. That's what she's abused as a kid.

34:09🔗 Adam Watch out, Drew's into her.

34:12🔗 Emily Procter Well, she's interesting.

34:13🔗 Adam A little heads up there.

34:14🔗 Emily Procter Carrie, you're your favorite. Jenna.

34:18🔗 Emily Procter Yeah.

34:18🔗 Adam Well, I feel like I discovered her. That's all. I want her to be named after me as I document her.

34:25🔗 Emily Procter And she's fascinating. I have her book. But then, of course, it's this big. So, yeah, I have not read it yet.

34:31🔗 Adam I'll just do the radio thing. Emily was holding her fingers up about three inches apart. You went to the Dr. Drew School of Broadcasting.

34:40🔗 Emily Procter I can see that right now.

34:41🔗 Drew This here.

34:43🔗 Adam Notice how Drew didn't bat an eyelid, by the way, when you just held your fingers up in a random distance.

34:47🔗 Drew I sounded good.

34:48🔗 Caller Relax.

34:49🔗 Emily Procter Carrie?

34:50🔗 Adam No, you just stopped caring a long time ago.

34:52🔗 Emily Procter Carrie? Yes.

34:54🔗 Drew Hey, man, when you talk like that, man, I don't even know you.

34:56🔗 Adam You know what I like? I like good movies where people tell people to take stuff back. Take that back. Take it back. You're right. I was out of line. Has anyone in real life ever told anyone take anything back?

35:07🔗 Drew You know, I was watching some shows. There's shows starting to pop up on TV now that are scripted versions of reality TV shows. It's like they're trying to make scripted stuff look like reality. And I thought, no, ain't there yet. You guys, you gotta learn to write what's real. You gotta learn how people actually work.

35:21🔗 Emily Procter What do you think about this then? Because I've noticed that happening and I wonder, is that the beginning of the end for reality television?

35:27🔗 Drew Yeah, I think that's how it is. I've been saying that for two years. That's where it's going to go. It's going to go to people actually learning how reality works and then representing it in drama.

35:35🔗 Emily Procter And it unwinds the whole thing.

35:36🔗 Drew But they're not doing it, they're still not doing it.

35:39🔗 Adam Take that back, Drew.

35:40🔗 Drew Man, how dare you?

35:41🔗 I'm going to start doing that too.

35:43🔗 Adam Hey man, when you act this way, it's like, I don't know you, man. See, you're not the only one who can act, Emily. I could act too, you know.

35:53🔗 Emily Procter I'll switch shows with you.

35:54🔗 Adam Watch, oh yeah.

35:55🔗 Drew We need to be on your show.

35:56🔗 Emily Procter I wish I would, y'all can come.

35:59🔗 Adam I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna act interested in Carrie's question.

36:03🔗 Drew Oh true. And your slab.

36:08🔗 Adam Drew, you saying you can act is unbelievable. You understand that? That's how bad an actor you are. No, I can act. Drew's got no chops. Carrie?

36:19🔗 Hi Adam.

36:20🔗 Adam Although if you want to do musical theater, this is your man.

36:26🔗 Drew Carrie, what's going on?

36:27🔗 Adam Go ahead, Carrie.

36:28🔗 Okay, well, I'm 16 and I'm...

36:30🔗 Adam Greatest Tevye the script...

36:33🔗 I'm bulimic and I want to know if I can switch from bulimic to anorexic because I've read about it. People are actually doing it because apparently they're caused by the same thing.

36:49🔗 Emily Procter Hold on, Drew's got to break in the song for a second.

36:53🔗 Drew Please stop this.

36:54🔗 Emily Procter He sings with the young lover laments, but she can't make the switch from anorexic to believing.

37:03🔗 Alright, alright, alright.

37:07🔗 Adam Carrie.

37:08🔗 Yes.

37:08🔗 Adam Sorry for that. So yeah, you want to go from bulimic to anorexic or is it vice versa?

37:15🔗 Bulimic to anorexic.

37:16🔗 Drew All right, so it's a very disturbed thought, Carrie. Let's get.

37:19🔗 Adam What is the true definition of both?

37:22🔗 Drew Bulimia is binging and purging of some nature and anorectia is restricting calories. You said of some nature, you mean you can have exercise bulimia, you could have diuretics, you could use laxatives.

37:33🔗 Adam You could say purging is burning calories via exercise? Right, but traditionally, that's not what people think of it.

37:39🔗 Emily Procter In fact, your name is getting more common. I'm sorry, I'm interrupting. No, please. Carrie, I'm curious why that's your idea.

37:47🔗 Well, because both of them, you end up dead, but anorexia, you don't have the same problems with the heart disease and electrolytes.

38:00🔗 Drew No, yes, you do. Yes, you do, Carrie. Yes, you do.

38:03🔗 Adam Well, anorexia is you basically stop eating, right?

38:06🔗 Drew And bulimia, bulimia slash anorexia is the syndrome for the most part. Most people kind of fluctuate around amongst the different.

38:13🔗 Adam Between not eating and then bitching and purging.

38:15🔗 Oh, with anorexia, you could think you're fat, but it gets to be skinny. Well, with bulimia, you're fat.

38:22🔗 Drew Sometimes, sometimes that's true. But you're right that anorexia often has more of a body image distortion. But Carrie, all disturbed thinking on your part, the fact that you're planning this way and all these things sound like good ideas, this is the way drug addicts behave in terms of their relationship with how they're planning their disease state. So you need to get this, as you say, you'll end up dead with this disease.

38:43🔗 Adam Well, this is a cry for help, but you know what? I was just thinking, it really should be changed to yelp for help, because it rhymes, and it just flows better, you know what I mean?

38:52🔗 Drew Cry for help?

38:53🔗 Adam Cry for help is effed out anyway. This is a yelp for help on Carrie's part.

38:58🔗 Drew It sounds a little too comedic.

38:59🔗 Adam A little Dr. Susie, but it's still effective. Carrie, you're yelping for helping right now.

39:04🔗 Can I ask you another question?

39:06🔗 Adam No, tell us what else is going on with you at home.

39:11🔗 Well, I'm 16, and I'm homeschooled, and I don't get along with my family, and I'm like, I want to be a model.

39:23🔗 Adam Well, here's the thing about being a model. Yes, you must be thin, but-

39:28🔗 Caller Let's be alive.

39:29🔗 Adam That is not the only, you have to be alive, and that's not, you know, I think a lot of people, a lot of chicks think, well, I'll just stop eating and I'll be a model. Oh, there's plenty of skinny chicks that don't look right. You don't get to be a model just because you're 110 pounds.

39:42🔗 Emily Procter I would say also as a girl.

39:44🔗 Caller You look good, yeah?

39:45🔗 Adam She says she looks good.

39:46🔗 I do.

39:47🔗 Adam How tall are you?

39:49🔗 Five-four.

39:50🔗 Adam Well, see, you can't be a model.

39:51🔗 Emily Procter You got two inches on me. You can be in TV instead.

39:54🔗 Adam You can be an actress, which can't be a model.

39:56🔗 Well, like Playboy model.

39:59🔗 Adam You want to be an actress, Playboy model?

40:01🔗 Yes, like Carolla Electra.

40:04🔗 Drew And you're you're being an astronaut.

40:06🔗 Adam I want to be an astronaut pirate, especially pirate astronaut.

40:09🔗 But either way, I actually am really pretty, though. OK.

40:13🔗 Drew Well, good. So don't destroy that.

40:15🔗 Adam It'd be nice if you just sort of believed in that instead of talk to us about it, you know.

40:21🔗 Drew It's so sad, Carrie, it's just sad.

40:23🔗 Adam Now, what's up with your parents and your family? Why don't you like them? And why are they homeschooling you?

40:27🔗 Drew And why aren't they getting you help?

40:29🔗 OK. Well, I never knew my dad.

40:31🔗 Caller And where's my bourbon?

40:33🔗 Alcoholic.

40:34🔗 Drew Yeah. Thank you. By the way, Carrie, they're getting a definite vibe from you that you've got that disease, too. Just the way you're thinking.

40:41🔗 I used to smoke weed a lot.

40:43🔗 Drew Yeah, you've got that disease.

40:44🔗 Adam Right. And now are you being homeschooled because you got into trouble at school or your mom's religious?

40:50🔗 Because everyone was mean to me at my school. Everyone thought I was about to steal their boyfriend.

40:57🔗 Adam No. I kind of was. Please. That's good. But Carrie, let me give you... Okay, listen. Here's the thing, sweetie. It's going to be a real long life if you approach it the way you're approaching it and a real long bad life.

41:15🔗 I'm trying doing like actual healthy diets and I can't do it.

41:20🔗 Drew Well, we need the emotional part of it. The interpersonal part of this.

41:23🔗 Emily Procter And I'm curious to see what y'all think about it. It seems like a lot of the behaviors that you have tie into really needing a great amount of either attention or adoration and maybe you have something that makes you not really feel validated yourself and it has to come from the outside. Is that possible?

41:42🔗 Drew Oh yeah, very deep. Very deeply.

41:44🔗 Adam Carrie, do me a favor. Tell your mom that you want some help. Just throw yourself on.

41:50🔗 She doesn't care, like she'll let me like tell myself.

41:53🔗 Adam Listen, the reason she pulled you out of school in this homeschooling is because she does care.

41:58🔗 Emily Procter Is there something that makes you feel confident? Do you like to be outside? Do you like to run or play tennis or?

42:06🔗 No, I don't like to play tennis.

42:08🔗 Adam All right, all right, just look, I don't know. Here's the thing.

42:14🔗 Drew Here's what's gonna rescue you.

42:16🔗 Adam Here's the deal, I feel like the mayor of New Orleans, which is it's our job to get on the bullhorn and tell people the flood is coming. If you won't leave your goddamn house, well, I'll see you on the roof and maybe we'll get you and maybe we won't.

42:29🔗 Drew Well, that's what's gonna happen. We're gonna get the helicopters out for carrying. That's when we'll see her, is when she's really in trouble.

42:34🔗 Adam At least she'll be light and be easy to pull up with the winch.

42:36🔗 Drew But the deal is, what will save her is actually a relationship. We're actually allowing somebody in. Let's make a romantic relationship.

42:46🔗 Emily Procter That's interesting. That's a great way to look at it.

42:49🔗 Adam We'll take ourselves a quick break. Be right back after this.

42:54🔗 The phone number for Loveline is 1-800-LOVE-191.

42:59🔗 Emily Procter Loveline, I'll be right back.

43:01🔗 Loveline is brought to you by Vibrations.

43:10🔗 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, Emily Procter here tonight from CSI Miami. Monday night, it's 10 o'clock. What's up, Drew?

43:19🔗 Drew We're giving out away again the iPod Nano, as we've been doing every night this week. So when you hear the White Stripes song, My Doorbell. Oh, we just played it?

43:28🔗 Adam That's our song, buddy.

43:29🔗 Emily Procter Did I win?

43:30🔗 Drew Well, anybody calling it right now, it says iPod Nano that's over 18 will win an iPod Nano and 10 free downloads from iTunes.

43:40🔗 It's as big as a brick, you say, Drew?

43:42🔗 Adam What's...

43:43🔗 Emily Procter Is it flesh-colored?

43:44🔗 Adam It doesn't say brick, he said cinder block. It's as big as a cinder block.

43:47🔗 Drew It's huge.

43:47🔗 Emily Procter Is it colored people?

43:49🔗 Adam Yeah, comes with a wagon, you drag it around it. It's awesome. And there's a harness you can use so you don't throw your back out there. Yeah, no, this holds 10 billion songs and holds 10 zillion pictures in the size of a credit card. And I swear to God, I've had this argument with intelligent people before where, you know, I say, well, I got the iPod. I don't have the full size iPod. I got the next one down. And they're like, yeah, that one only holds 1,300 songs. And I'm like, yeah, well, call me crazy, but I could probably name 150 songs before I started repeating. You'd hear Maneater, I would repeat it three or four times by the time I got to 60 songs. Maneater would be number three and then be number 62 and be number 111, too. I would run out of songs to mention. And people are like, well, come on, 1,300. And then they do this scenario where it's like, you know, you pop it in, you listen to a couple songs and, you know, 44 hours later, hear the same song again. It's like 1,300, not enough songs, not enough songs for you. Like, well, this other one holds 5,000 songs. I know it holds more, but you used to just make these mix cassettes on 60-minute.

45:01🔗 Emily Procter That's what I was going to say. I am so not good at technology. I got a new car this year and it had a cassette deck in it. I couldn't be happier. I'm just like, there's a tape, there's 16 songs. It's perfect. Yeah.

45:14🔗 So I need.

45:15🔗 Adam You got to flip it over.

45:16🔗 Emily Procter It's the master mix or it's like the whale watching mix.

45:20🔗 It's like weekend mix.

45:22🔗 Adam I love it. The whole thing is, is if someone made you a mix on a 90 minute cassette, you were good. You're good for a month on that. It's like, yeah, 1300 songs. I mean, come on, how are you going to get by with that? You just.

45:35🔗 Emily Procter How are you supposed to know all the words when you're old?

45:37🔗 All the songs you're still listening to?

45:39🔗 Adam You hear the same song like every four years. It's horrible. Really? Really? You don't think you get by on, like, let's just say 300 songs before you wouldn't mind hearing the next one again? OK.

45:50🔗 Caller All right.

45:51🔗 Drew Just saying.

45:51🔗 Caller All right.

45:52🔗 Adam Why does everyone argue with me?

45:53🔗 Drew He's a music man. Samantha, 22.

45:55🔗 Adam Oh, you should hear the greatest tevye that Pasadena College has ever seen.

46:01🔗 Drew Samantha.

46:02🔗 Adam Samantha?

46:03🔗 Drew Hello? What's up?

46:04🔗 Adam 22?

46:05🔗 Hi. Yeah.

46:06🔗 Adam What's up?

46:07🔗 Oh, nothing.

46:08🔗 Drew All right. We got to take another break, though, unfortunately.

46:13🔗 Adam You must be you must be nice looking. You good looking, Samantha?

46:19🔗 Drew Samantha?

46:22🔗 Adam Is she answering and hanging up?

46:24🔗 Drew Now, she's only on hold for 12 minutes, by the way.

46:26🔗 Emily Procter I don't think she knew she was on air and she just figured it out.

46:28🔗 Caller And now she's just freaking out.

46:30🔗 Adam All right, Samantha, are you are you there?

46:35🔗 Drew I'm going to take a break anyway.

46:37🔗 Emily Procter Oh, thank God we get paid by the hour.

46:39🔗 Emily Procter She just broke up with you.

46:41🔗 Adam We're alive. Now, Drew went too long talking about his iPod. Now we got to take a break. We'll take a quick break. We have Emily Proctor's here tonight from CSI Miami, and we'll be right back after this.

46:53🔗 Alright, guys, here's the deal.

46:55🔗 You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

46:58🔗 Emily Procter One call is all you need to make.

46:59🔗 Drew Call the Dateline.

47:00🔗 877-889-DATE.

47:03🔗 Call the Dateline.

47:36🔗 Emily Procter Yeah, buddy, it's Loveline.

47:37🔗 Adam I'm Adam Nitz, Dr. True, font number 1-800-ELEV- Emily Procter is here tonight. She is here from CSI Miami, and Jeff Probst is showing up a little bit later on in the...

47:55🔗 Drew A lot of you back.

47:56🔗 Adam Yeah, she's going to be back. And Jeff Probst is, I'm just a huge fan of that survivor. I like the show, I like him. I like everything about him. He looks great in a choker, he looks great in a safari shirt.

48:09🔗 Drew And khaki.

48:10🔗 Adam Khaki looks awesome, and khaki, he does one thing that bothers me whenever he starts the challenges he raises one hand and then throws the one hand down and raises the other hand and it's a little goofy. I want to talk to him about that.

48:22🔗 Drew Bring that up.

48:22🔗 Adam It doesn't make sense to me, but yeah.

48:25🔗 Drew All right, we have our winner for the iPod.

48:27🔗 Adam You know the other thing he does too? He knows everyone's name. You know, 18 survivors day one's like Mitch, John, JB.

48:35🔗 Drew What do you think?

48:36🔗 Adam Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, what do you think? Sarah, you got a face on and it's real time stuff like it's one of these things where they're all sitting around the very first night around. They're sitting around the tribal council and he's like, Maria, what do you think? Oh, Chacko, you're nodding. You got something to say? And I'd be like, dude, what's up? Hey, Air Jordan. Yeah, Jordan.

48:55🔗 Yeah.

48:55🔗 Adam OK. Nike shirt.

48:56🔗 Yeah.

48:56🔗 Adam What do you got? I'd be in the week 17 and what's his nose? Looks like he thinks ponytail over here is not pulling Birkenstock's weight. Well, what's up? Like he just 18 names and it doesn't seem to be. I'd have him written down in one of those quarterback wristbands.

49:13🔗 Drew Sure. Sure.

49:14🔗 Adam I'd be like fat guy with mustache Jake, you know, just look down and send my little cheat sheet on there. Yes. I'm very smart, man.

49:20🔗 Drew I think what he does, he has stage hands with huge standing behind him behind each of the guys.

49:26🔗 Emily Procter That's what I was going to say. I think he was just part of the casting process.

49:29🔗 Adam I'm going to have to ask ask him on Wednesday. But go ahead, Drew.

49:33🔗 Drew So our iPod Nano is going to Jason from Salt Lake. He's 23. He's very excited about this as well. He should be. He gets 10 free downloads and there will be again tomorrow night.

49:42🔗 Adam Yeah. Were you going to say something, Emily?

49:47🔗 Emily Procter Well, I was just going to say I'm going to try and win tomorrow night.

49:50🔗 Drew You won't when they're nice. Let's try Samantha again.

49:55🔗 Adam Oh, okay. Samantha?

49:57🔗 Uh-huh.

49:58🔗 Drew There you are. What happened to you?

49:59🔗 Well, my phone's really stupid and it's like done really bad. And so the speaker doesn't work very well. So it's really quiet. But I totally got you right now. So I'm happy.

50:08🔗 Adam Okay. What's up, baby doll?

50:10🔗 Well, I have a really good question for you.

50:15🔗 Caller Go.

50:16🔗 Well, okay. So I had sex with this one guy and we use a condom, but I went to the doctor and found out that I have gonorrhea. That's not a fun surprise from the doctor, let me tell you. And so I was wondering if he and I use a condom, like if it's still like transferable between the two of us.

50:36🔗 Drew Well, no, I'm a little confused. He you had only condom contact, right?

50:43🔗 Right.

50:44🔗 Drew And then you went to the doctor with what kind of symptoms?

50:46🔗 I didn't actually have any symptoms, it was just a regular checkup.

50:50🔗 Drew And how many days after the intercourse?

50:53🔗 It was like a week later, but I don't think I got it from him, that makes me sound really...

50:58🔗 Drew Yeah. And how did they make...

51:00🔗 Adam They don't check you for gonorrhea when you're just in for regular physical, right?

51:06🔗 Drew Hey, they have to do special cultures, it takes a while.

51:10🔗 I know. Well, I had never gone in before, so I wanted them to check for absolutely everything that was a special check I've ever had in general.

51:17🔗 Drew Right.

51:18🔗 So I asked them to check for like everything.

51:22🔗 Drew And so what, they called you back a few days later and said you grew gonorrhea?

51:26🔗 Yeah, they called me back and said that yeah, I had gonorrhea.

51:30🔗 Caller That's hard for me to believe.

51:31🔗 Emily Procter So not to butt in, but it seems like your question is not really... It seems like you have a pretty good idea of who you are in your sex life and you got yourself tested for everything, but your real question is, can you give it to this guy if you have sex with him again? Or do you think you need to tell him that you had it when you had sex with him? Is that the question?

51:48🔗 Yeah. Well, no. The question is, if we use the condom, can it go back and forth?

51:54🔗 Drew If you use a condom, you're pretty safe, but not a 100 percent. They gave you, I'm sure, a shot, right?

52:02🔗 Well, they gave me some pills to take.

52:04🔗 Drew Right.

52:05🔗 Yeah.

52:05🔗 Drew And the gonorrhea goes away right away. So you should be fine in terms of infectivity.

52:11🔗 Adam You know, one, one, you know.

52:13🔗 Drew It's always very suspicious. You didn't hear what they said or this is what it was called.

52:17🔗 Adam I don't think this is bogus because she's just confused about what. She's a chick and it's boring and who cares?

52:21🔗 Drew Don't wonder.

52:23🔗 Adam They gave me pills to take is like engaged to be married.

52:26🔗 Drew Yeah.

52:27🔗 Adam We'll do the math on they gave you pills.

52:28🔗 Drew Right.

52:29🔗 Adam We didn't realize they didn't give you pills in a wrist rocket.

52:31🔗 Drew To not take.

52:32🔗 Adam I did a fire at Blue Jays. I understand they gave you pills to take. I'm engaged to be married. That kind of engagement.

52:40🔗 Drew They said gonorrhea, Samantha.

52:43🔗 Adam Did they say that?

52:44🔗 Drew Yeah.

52:45🔗 Are you making fun of me? I was just wondering.

52:47🔗 Drew Well, yeah. The pills to take part we're making fun of.

52:50🔗 Adam But please understand you are a faceless, nameless number to me. They make fun of everyone. Yeah.

52:57🔗 Emily Procter They make fun of me so mercilessly on the break that I cried.

53:00🔗 Adam I'm not making funny. I'm not making fun of you.

53:02🔗 I feel very privileged then because I guess you guys are all high and mighty.

53:05🔗 Caller So I guess what was the right?

53:07🔗 Adam Right. No, no, please. Let me explain. You're nobody. So I'm not making fun of you. I'm making fun of nobody. You understand?

53:14🔗 Drew What was the antibiotic that they gave you? Samantha? What antibiotics did they give you?

53:17🔗 Caller I'm still figuring this out.

53:19🔗 But I guess that doesn't matter since I'm nobody. I'm not sure exactly what they gave me. They just gave me some like they gave me just some pills.

53:27🔗 Drew Are you? Are you?

53:28🔗 Adam Are you good looking?

53:29🔗 Drew Of course.

53:30🔗 Caller Damn hot sex. What else?

53:32🔗 Drew Yeah. Did they give you pills you took for five days or pills you took for a week or two?

53:36🔗 They just when I went there, they just gave me pills to take that one time and that was the one time thing.

53:41🔗 Drew OK. So that's chlamydia they're treating. That's not gonorrhea.

53:45🔗 No, it was when I first went in there, like just in case.

53:49🔗 Drew All right, Samantha, it's not gonorrhea. So this would make sense to me. To be fair, just in case it's gonorrhea.

53:55🔗 Adam Yeah, she only said gonorrhea 126 times. It's not like she said it 130 times.

54:00🔗 Drew This is what just did not make sense. All right, so it's chlamydia there.

54:03🔗 Adam I think they gave her roofies just to shut her up.

54:04🔗 Drew And by the way, gonorrhea, you do have symptoms when you have gonorrhea and they're rather severe.

54:08🔗 Adam All right, so chlamydia is the one you made up.

54:10🔗 Drew Chlamydia is what you don't have symptoms from.

54:12🔗 Adam That's what it was.

54:12🔗 When I went to the doctor, they're like, you could have, they're like, gonorrhea and chlamydia don't generally have symptoms. They told me that.

54:19🔗 Caller Like I wasn't sure if I had anything, but like when I got the story, oh, look, so far you screwed the story completely up.

54:25🔗 Drew They gave you a single dose of azithromycin. That clears up the chlamydia. They usually give you a shot of rosephan or septraxone for the gonorrhea. You thought you had gonorrhea, they would have given you the shot. So they really didn't think you had gonorrhea.

54:37🔗 Adam Well, either way, you're cured. What's going on with you? You're working?

54:41🔗 Actually.

54:42🔗 Emily Procter Cocktailing?

54:43🔗 Adam Um, a little cocktail work.

54:47🔗 Drew Stripping?

54:48🔗 A little no cocktail work, actually.

54:49🔗 Adam What are you working? Were you working while junior college, perhaps?

54:52🔗 No, I'm actually a hairstylist.

54:55🔗 Adam Oh, I have a theory. All right, I'm going to put you on hold, Samantha, and you feel free to hang up on yourself. Hairstylists are baddie. And I have a theory. I have a theory.

55:07🔗 Drew So the spray gets in their brain and...

55:10🔗 Adam Yes.

55:10🔗 Drew This is what the solvents are doing.

55:11🔗 Adam Who knows this theory because he's heard it before, but...

55:13🔗 Drew No, you've never said that.

55:14🔗 Adam Oh, yes, I have.

55:15🔗 Drew I don't remember you saying this. Go ahead.

55:16🔗 Adam Well, you see, what you do is you hijack my clever theories.

55:21🔗 Drew So tell me, tell me.

55:22🔗 Adam Drew, do you think you could have come up with that clever theory?

55:25🔗 Drew I just thought that... I don't have the theory yet. Tell me the theory. Where are you going?

55:28🔗 Adam That's the theory.

55:28🔗 Drew That you're something that... Well, what gets...

55:30🔗 Adam Aquanet. It destroys their brain. Well, their brains are soft to begin with.

55:34🔗 Caller They always use aquanet.

55:36🔗 Adam Well, whatever it is, the hydrocarbons, the fluorocarbons, whatever, all the spray, they live in a mist of spray and that weakens their brain. And their brain is already crippled. That's why they got into the business.

55:48🔗 Drew It's inhaled hydrocarbons, really, yeah.

55:50🔗 Adam Well, it's essentially... Picture taking a dumb person and having them huff, cop your toner four hours a day. Okay, you tell me six years later, tell me what you got.

56:00🔗 Drew Well, something. Something going on.

56:01🔗 Adam Yeah, you don't have an Asian pianist. Do you understand? You understand what I'm saying?

56:06🔗 Drew Yeah.

56:07🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah. No, no, Drew, I've expressed this many times.

56:11🔗 Drew Well, I remember you saying something about Aquanet. I don't remember that. Well, I didn't do the math.

56:14🔗 Adam Hairstylists, here's the thing. Hairstylist, beauticians, people that do the facial stuff, the cuticle pushes and all that kind of stuff are amongst the most vacuous people on the planet. And I think even the guys are exquisitely dumb. And there's an interesting thing too, which is the people who do hair, especially guys who do hair, act like they're doing something really important.

56:40🔗 Drew Jonathan, you've seen him, you love his show.

56:41🔗 Adam Which is a strange, strange thing, especially as a male to claim. Now I understand if you're gay, perhaps you can cling to it as doing something or making a difference. But there are a handful of straight hairstylists who act as if they're curing cancer on a daily basis or making some sort of, I mean, they have themselves ranked up just above firemen on a societal importance chart, you know what I mean? And they really have no idea that they do nothing. And I'll take it a step further. When you're talking about my hair and possibly even your noggin too, Drew, you could take me to the Mexican chick I go to over in Ventura. That's called, it's called like modern model cuts or something, euphemistically, you know, they're trying too hard. Or you could take to the Fantastic Sam's or you could go over the Supercut for 12 bucks.

57:33🔗 Emily Procter Supercut's John Sliver, best haircut in town. That's right.

57:37🔗 Adam Or you could go get a $200 cut from one of these prima donnas and no one could tell the difference. That is the challenge. That is the challenge.

57:44🔗 Emily Procter So here's getting his haircut tomorrow, by the way.

57:46🔗 Adam Here's the thing about hair, why do you think you're doing something important? Whatever is your first off, no matter how great a job you do, it's all going to grow out in six weeks anyway. So who cares?

57:55🔗 Drew Interesting.

57:56🔗 Adam But what is that? I mean, here's the thing, bartenders know they're not doing something important. People that, waiters, waitresses, even folks that, even guys that work security at concert venues and stuff, they all know they're not doing anything important. Why is it that you cut hair and think you're doing something important? It's an interesting thing, Drew. I think it attracts prima donnas and it attracts narcissists. It is a business that is a magnet for narcissists.

58:25🔗 Drew Could be.

58:26🔗 Emily Procter Well, you explain it.

58:29🔗 Adam You explain it. They're people that work at the Lawrence Livermore Laboratory, that don't feel they're making as big a contribution to society as you, who puts bangs on guys.

58:39🔗 Drew It may be the way their clients make them feel.

58:43🔗 Adam It's the world they're living in. Yes.

58:46🔗 Drew The clients think it's important to them too.

58:47🔗 Adam I'm just trying to think. I would like to figure out the list of occupations that have the highest self-importance factor and actual impact.

58:56🔗 Drew So putting my hair in your hands is just under putting my life in your hands.

59:02🔗 Adam No, just above, according to these guys. Just above. Or maybe quite a bit above.

59:06🔗 Drew Yeah.

59:07🔗 Adam Everything else is just sort of pedestrian. They change lives. And by the way, I don't buy this crap when people go like, hey, I make people feel good about themselves, and that makes a huge difference in their life. I don't buy that crap.

59:22🔗 Drew Plastic surgeons say that too.

59:23🔗 Adam Yeah. I don't buy that either. But I still put them above hair stylists. And here's the, I'll give you another, I'll give you another for instance. I think I could train any monkey to cut hair in about three weeks. Thank you. Thank you. Please. Please. Here's the deal. You go to a college, you practice on a styrofoam head and you get a certificate in six weeks. Give me a break. You people don't do anything. Quit acting like you're doing something. And just join the ranks of society who doesn't do anything, knows they don't do anything and act like they don't do anything. People who work in bicycle stores don't act like they're doing anything. 90% of society, garbage men, waiters, they don't do anything. They don't act like it. There's a handful of people that do do something. Maybe they're air traffic controllers and maybe they're neurosurgeons. They don't even act like it as much as people that cut hair. You realize that airplane pilots aren't as self-important as guys who cut hair? You realize that? Please, drop the attitude. Or start wearing a respirator because Aquanet is destroying your brain.

1:00:31🔗 Drew Eric 25.

1:00:32🔗 Adam The guys are even worse than the chicks. The chicks at least are just stupid. The guys, oh, pompous asses. Go ahead, Eric.

1:00:40🔗 What's up, guys?

1:00:41🔗 Drew What's up, Emily?

1:00:41🔗 I cut hair. That's what I do.

1:00:43🔗 Drew Germany or Florida?

1:00:44🔗 We have a Germany or Florida.

1:00:45🔗 Drew Oh, this is our buddy, Eric.

1:00:46🔗 Adam Time to play Germany or Florida.

1:00:47🔗 Drew This is our buddy from the printing shop, whatever you do. What do you do, Eric? There you go.

1:00:52🔗 Yeah, that's it.

1:00:53🔗 Adam Go ahead.

1:00:54🔗 Yeah, Adam, I also got some information on that ammunition for you afterwards, if you're interested.

1:00:58🔗 Drew The 6.56 millimeter ammunition?

1:01:00🔗 Adam That's the 5.56.

1:01:02🔗 Yeah. Yeah.

1:01:03🔗 Adam I'm interested in that before the Germany or Florida. That was a call that came earlier. It was a machine gun.

1:01:08🔗 The math actually works out to that being the same round as the 223, which is what the M16 uses, so it doesn't come down to muzzle velocity even though it's a smaller round.

1:01:16🔗 Emily Procter Right.

1:01:17🔗 Adam The deal is, it's just wound a bunch of people, get them out of that.

1:01:21🔗 You don't have to kill them. That has a muzzle velocity. If it just zips by you, it'll tear skin open. I mean, just by the sheer velocity of it.

1:01:29🔗 Adam Yeah, but here's what I'm saying. It's turned into a military show. But here's the thing.

1:01:37🔗 Emily Procter Thank God I'm a ballistics expert.

1:01:39🔗 Adam Something like the, well, you'll know, yeah, Emily. Something like the M16, small, small round. And the deal is, is if you shoot somebody on the battlefield and they're injured, it's like a football game. They got to come off. Somebody's got to collect them. Someone's got to drag them. Someone's got to get them out of there. And they're not any good anymore. As a matter of fact, they're probably better than being dead. Right. Because they take resources and time and they're not coming back for a good long time. So why, why blow everyone's head off when you can, well, you can kill them, but you can also wound them and get them out of commission. All right. Go ahead, Eric.

1:02:13🔗 Exactly. And it takes more guys off the field to drag them off. And you also got distance because of the muzzle velocity, which was a bigger round you wouldn't have.

1:02:21🔗 Adam Thank you. Go ahead, Eric.

1:02:23🔗 Police responded to a disturbance call in which a man suspected one of his neighbors of animal abuse. When the police arrived at the house, they heard sounds of dogs howling from inside. After several knocks on the door went unanswered, the police entered to find the owner of the house photographing what he later called puppy porn. He had intended to start a website where he could post pictures of his dogs dressed in leather and in bondage poses. Germany or Florida?

1:02:46🔗 Drew Germany.

1:02:47🔗 Adam Wow, this is good. Feels German.

1:02:48🔗 Drew Germany.

1:02:49🔗 Adam To me, Emily, what do you think?

1:02:51🔗 Emily Procter I don't know. I'm going to have to go with Florida.

1:02:54🔗 Adam Smart.

1:02:54🔗 Drew Not bad.

1:02:55🔗 Adam Smart. Shrewd. Hold on a second. Now, why do you say Florida?

1:02:58🔗 Emily Procter I spend a lot of time there.

1:03:00🔗 Caller Oh, that's good.

1:03:01🔗 Adam You know just how effed up those people can be.

1:03:04🔗 Emily Procter The weather's warm. It makes you a little baddy.

1:03:06🔗 Adam Makes you nutty.

1:03:06🔗 Emily Procter Yeah. Yeah.

1:03:07🔗 Adam Let me tell you something about Florida. Everything is worse in Florida. Like, you know, they go like, oh, oh, you think you got cockroaches.

1:03:14🔗 Emily Procter You got mosquitoes.

1:03:15🔗 Adam Oh, you think you got me. Oh, you've not been out to the panhandle. You're not seeing what goes. Yeah.

1:03:21🔗 Emily Procter Also, I just think it's easier to get your hand on a lot of puppies in Florida than it is in Germany. Really? Don't you think?

1:03:28🔗 Adam No, but sort of.

1:03:29🔗 Has it gotten really late for me that that makes sense?

1:03:32🔗 Adam No, I don't think puppy availability is, I'm not factoring that in. That's not a main factor.

1:03:37🔗 Drew Leather goes Germany for me.

1:03:38🔗 Emily Procter Actually, I just had this moment where I'm like, oh, at 11, 16, I lost it. I've been up for 10.

1:03:43🔗 Adam Puppy availability. I think leather, first off, Florida's a little warm to dress a dog in leather.

1:03:51🔗 Drew Yeah, it'll be locked in with your dogs.

1:03:53🔗 Adam Yeah. Here's all I'm saying. You are right that everything is worse in Florida. Like we have snakes out here, but they're not all poisonous. We have mosquitoes. They're not the size of frisbees and so on and so forth. Everything is just worse over there. And that, and that then trickles down to the people. The people are worse over there too. So you say-

1:04:15🔗 Caller They're just always on vacation.

1:04:17🔗 Emily Procter It's Florida, it's worse.

1:04:18🔗 Adam Yeah, they're horrible people. You say they're running from something. You say Florida, Drew and I are going Germany. Eric?

1:04:25🔗 Well, let me just tell Emily first. I lived in Germany for five years and I could tell you some stories of what happens to puppies over there.

1:04:31🔗 Drew What did you just told us one?

1:04:32🔗 Düsseldorf, Germany.

1:04:34🔗 Adam Thank you. Thank you.

1:04:38🔗 I lived there for five years and I had a landlord and he was, you know, kind of the older generation farmer guy and his farm dog had puppies that he didn't want. So he got rid of them by throwing them against the wall until they were deceased.

1:04:49🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:04:49🔗 Drew Oh, that's nice.

1:04:50🔗 Adam Yeah, yeah. Who would have guessed that those people were capable of something like that in Germans? That's just a peace loving people over there.

1:04:59🔗 It's not the people, it's the government, right?

1:05:01🔗 Adam Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I always love that. I love that one. It's not the people. They're great people. It's the government. The government, what country do they import them from?

1:05:10🔗 Drew The people.

1:05:12🔗 Adam Yeah. What's the German government? What is that?

1:05:15🔗 Drew What was Eric doing over there in Germany for five years?

1:05:17🔗 Adam Military.

1:05:18🔗 Drew You think?

1:05:19🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:05:19🔗 Drew Eric?

1:05:20🔗 Yeah.

1:05:20🔗 Drew What the hell were you doing over there for five years?

1:05:23🔗 I had a job throwing puppies against the wall. My dad was in the military.

1:05:28🔗 Drew Dad was in the military.

1:05:29🔗 I saw the Berlin Wall come down.

1:05:31🔗 Drew Wow.

1:05:31🔗 Adam Oh, wow.

1:05:32🔗 That's neat. Yeah, that's cool.

1:05:34🔗 Adam The Berlin Wall, thanks for calling. The Berlin Wall was funny. Well, look, whenever you see guys that sound like who don't, or then we see black guys in like Germany, what the? Oh yeah, military. You always got to go military. Like you see some brother is like, yeah, he was born in Mainz, Germany. It's like, what the? Oh, OK. All right. All right. Now it's snapped into focus. A lot of we got we got a lot of military guys over over Germany. Yeah.

1:06:00🔗 Emily Procter I think that if I try and jump in with any more advice, I'll just remind me that I think it's easier to get a hold of puppies in Florida than it is in Germany.

1:06:07🔗 Caller I think someone needs to just intervene and say, um, yeah, puppies are a real premium in Germany.

1:06:12🔗 Adam They don't have puppies over there. The dogs are born full size. They come out full. It's tough on the mothers. Oh, yeah. They got to give an extra, you know, stitch for the episiotomy. But yeah, they're they're born. They're born at nine years. There's no puppies.

1:06:27🔗 Emily Procter It's really easy to get your hands on puppies in America.

1:06:29🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah. I can't believe a German would actually kill somebody in a cruel way that way. It just doesn't seem right. I just not that the Germany I know, not the Germany that tried to round up every Jew in the world.

1:06:40🔗 Emily Procter I was going to say, your people love Germany.

1:06:42🔗 Adam Yeah, they're great. They're wonderful, beautiful people over there.

1:06:45🔗 Drew People joined up with them.

1:06:47🔗 Adam I was going to. Yeah, my Italian brother.

1:06:49🔗 Emily Procter As I said, I was like, oh, the Corollas. Actually, see, it's official. This has been great.

1:06:53🔗 Caller I have loved being here. I think I should go to sleep.

1:06:56🔗 Adam Mussolini got strung up, though. That was a good, that was a good news. You know what I like about, too? They got hold of Mussolini and his girlfriend. I'm like, yeah, put them both in town. Like, it doesn't matter. Like, back in the day, they would not only string your ass up, whoever you effed last got strung up, too. Wife, girlfriend, didn't matter. You're going, too.

1:07:14🔗 Drew It's an old country way of doing things.

1:07:15🔗 Adam Yeah, what do you got? You got a dog? You got anything else we can string up? We'll string it all up. You got some puppies? Put your puppies right in, a premium in Germany, I think, Italy, and have them string them up right in the center of town. Yeah, I'm telling you we need to bomb Germany again. I'm one of the few people has the guts to admit this, but we are not done with that country. We have not begun to repay that country. Just not done. Give Japan a little shot, too.

1:07:39🔗 Emily Procter A little something something.

1:07:40🔗 Everyone thinks that's insane.

1:07:42🔗 Drew What do you want to do with the Middle East?

1:07:44🔗 Adam You know what? I'll give the Middle East a little break.

1:07:46🔗 Drew Really?

1:07:47🔗 Adam Give them a little break and bomb Germany.

1:07:50🔗 Drew Why the break for the Middle East?

1:07:51🔗 Adam Well, here's the whole thing, the way I look at it. Middle East, we don't agree with them philosophically. We have a few beefs with them. Well, ultimately, in terms of our people, they're accountable for several thousand deaths, whereas German, several million. See what I'm saying?

1:08:09🔗 Drew I see you need a little payback.

1:08:10🔗 Adam It's payback time. And Japanese as well. Japanese got a much higher death toll. What I mean is, here's the thing. You know when they have fighter airplanes and they have the little sticker on it, little Japanese flag or swastika or whatever, and that's for every German plane you shot down, for every Japanese plane. If you took a look at a Middle Eastern plane, there would only be a handful of American flags on there. If you took a look at a German flag, there would be millions. You see what I'm saying? Hundreds of thousands. Same with Japanese. So I'm saying, let's prioritize.

1:08:39🔗 Drew Get the Middle East chance to catch up.

1:08:40🔗 Adam Let you guys catch up. And we'll be bombing Germany. And it'll be one of those things where it's like, look, not sure if you guys are planning anything or what you got planned on later in the century. We'll just give a quick little bombing, little wake up call, little something. Well, how do you do? Just in case you got something else going on. You know, when to round up any more people and put them in ovens.

1:09:05🔗 Drew Jason 23.

1:09:05🔗 Adam Let's give them a little shot.

1:09:06🔗 Drew Jason.

1:09:07🔗 Adam And yeah, that makes me crazy by the way.

1:09:09🔗 Drew Jason, what's up?

1:09:11🔗 Hey, what's going on? Right.

1:09:13🔗 Adam What's happening? Here's a-

1:09:16🔗 Drew Hold on Jason.

1:09:17🔗 Adam Let me just say this. We never, you know, we're still getting our ass kicked around for slavery. That was a lot further, further back than what the Germans were doing. Why can't we still kick the Germans ass around for what they're trying to do to the Jews in Europe? Know what I mean?

1:09:31🔗 Yeah.

1:09:31🔗 Adam That's in the 40s. See what I'm saying?

1:09:33🔗 Yeah.

1:09:33🔗 Adam If we, if we can still get our butt kicked around, and rightfully so, for slavery, we can still kick their butt around for at least a good hundred years. That's all I'm saying. This is, you, you know, you blowing up a couple train stations, that we can forget about in 40, 50 years. You, you rounding up six million Jews, that stays on your record.

1:09:51🔗 Drew Laughing time is over.

1:09:52🔗 Adam That's going to stay on your record for just a couple, couple centuries. Yeah?

1:09:55🔗 Drew Fair enough.

1:09:56🔗 Adam Make sense?

1:09:57🔗 Drew Makes sense.

1:09:57🔗 Adam Yeah. It's good. It's good. It's like declaring bankruptcy. You can't just do it to get out of paying a visa bill and then just go out and buy a car the next day. It's got to stay on your record for a few years. Yes?

1:10:09🔗 Drew Fair enough.

1:10:09🔗 Adam That's how you learn. Go ahead, Jason.

1:10:13🔗 Hey, what's going on?

1:10:14🔗 Drew I love the fact Jason's from Laguna Beach, and now Laguna is kind of where I grew up, and now it's an icon because of that MTV show.

1:10:21🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, Drew, you put it on the map. Of course. North Garden there.

1:10:25🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:10:26🔗 Adam Bronze skin glistening in the sun.

1:10:28🔗 Drew They'd only done the show about us in the late 70s, early 80s.

1:10:31🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:10:31🔗 Drew Oh yeah. We had good times.

1:10:33🔗 Adam Go ahead, Jason.

1:10:34🔗 OK. Anyway, I've been with my girlfriend for about a year now, and sex has been great up until about a month ago. She hasn't really been able to orgasm during sex, but I got this thing called a butterfly or a dolphin online. She basically wears this while we have sex, and she's been able to orgasm.

1:10:54🔗 Drew She has been able to.

1:10:55🔗 And she has been able to with this. And we tried a couple of times without, and she enjoys it, but there's no orgasm.

1:11:01🔗 Drew Right. That makes her a normal woman.

1:11:04🔗 I just want to know, like, you know, is this going to be how it is from now on?

1:11:09🔗 Drew Yes.

1:11:09🔗 Adam Yes.

1:11:10🔗 100%.

1:11:12🔗 Drew You're lucky that she was able to orgasm and all during intercourse. Most women can't, even with the dolphin.

1:11:17🔗 This thing, it like clips on.

1:11:20🔗 Drew I understand, but a lot of women, just having somebody inside.

1:11:23🔗 Adam We understand it's in the room.

1:11:25🔗 Drew Yeah, just having it in the room.

1:11:26🔗 Adam We understand it's not an actual dolphin.

1:11:28🔗 Drew Having penetration.

1:11:30🔗 Adam He's acting like it's an actual dolphin on top of his girlfriend.

1:11:33🔗 Emily Procter He's like flippers banging at his girlfriend.

1:11:35🔗 Drew Jason smokes so much pot, he might still.

1:11:37🔗 Adam Jason is in the dolphin's blowhole while the dolphin's going down on the old lady.

1:11:42🔗 Drew Yeah, she's in the tail.

1:11:43🔗 Adam You understand this clips on.

1:11:45🔗 Caller Is this going to go on?

1:11:47🔗 Drew Yeah, do we have to deal with this?

1:11:49🔗 Adam This is going on for hundreds and hundreds of years, as long as stars have been in the sky. You'll be dead and your grandchildren, your great grandchildren will be using this dolphin on their girlfriends.

1:11:59🔗 Drew A lot of women, I dare say most, have some sort of inhibitory response just with penetration. So you're lucky that you can get this to happen. It's not as common as not common.

1:12:10🔗 Adam What's the beef for you?

1:12:11🔗 I mean, I don't know, just in the past, that's never been a problem. And I just, you know, Well, that's frustrating.

1:12:21🔗 Drew You've been on a lucky streak. Over 60%, roughly 60% of women can never have orgasm with intercourse.

1:12:27🔗 Adam The past with this girlfriend?

1:12:29🔗 No, no, no, no. I mean, me and her are great. I'm saying like in the past with other girls.

1:12:33🔗 Drew His series, his previous series, they were able to orgasm with intercourse, which is rare, not rare, which is not as common.

1:12:39🔗 Adam Look at this, look at this as a wake up call.

1:12:42🔗 A wake up call?

1:12:43🔗 Drew For how it's gonna be with most women.

1:12:45🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah.

1:12:48🔗 That's crazy. Okay.

1:12:49🔗 Drew That's crazy, that's how it is.

1:12:52🔗 Adam Look, if you're gonna end your life, now's the time.

1:12:56🔗 I don't think I'll be doing that.

1:12:57🔗 Drew All right.

1:12:58🔗 Adam Easy on the weed, Jason.

1:13:00🔗 Emily Procter And I'll just give you the female perspective for a second.

1:13:03🔗 Adam Go ahead, Emma.

1:13:04🔗 Emily Procter Don't let it make you feel bad. It's got nothing to do with you.

1:13:07🔗 Adam That's right. Out of your control.

1:13:09🔗 Drew How the orgasm functions with a female has been recently shown to be a genetically determined issue.

1:13:15🔗 Adam To write that down.

1:13:16🔗 Drew Yeah. I'll give it to your wife.

1:13:17🔗 Adam You need a note. Yeah.

1:13:19🔗 Emily Procter You've got a pen.

1:13:20🔗 Adam Please. Jason.

1:13:23🔗 Drew Yeah. You smoke a lot of vodka.

1:13:24🔗 Adam What's going on with you and the weed, brother?

1:13:26🔗 I mean, I wouldn't say, you know. I mean.

1:13:27🔗 Drew Jason. Jason. Who are you kidding? Who are you talking to, stone head? It's at least two big bowls a day.

1:13:33🔗 Yeah.

1:13:34🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:13:35🔗 You know, on weekends, definitely. Yeah.

1:13:37🔗 Drew And definitely every day.

1:13:39🔗 Adam Let me explain weekend.

1:13:40🔗 You know what?

1:13:41🔗 Emily Procter Tuesday through Sunday night.

1:13:43🔗 I get high one time a day at night after work.

1:13:46🔗 Drew And that's controlling yourself anymore. Anymore.

1:13:48🔗 Anymore.

1:13:49🔗 Drew Last week. Last week you made a pack.

1:13:51🔗 Yeah. No, no, no. It's been a while now. I've been pretty. I've been pretty good with it.

1:13:54🔗 Adam What do you do for a living?

1:13:56🔗 I actually I go around the country and I talk to undergrads about consulting, IT consulting. And so there's been going on for about six months now and I just go and recruit.

1:14:08🔗 Adam And is that is that a head? Does that make you a head headhunter?

1:14:12🔗 Well, I'm going to be eventually, but it's kind of like a two-year training program where I go and I kind of learn, you know, learn about it and everything. We just know. Because I'm gone from my girlfriend, you know, about a month at a time, but.

1:14:27🔗 Drew Just realize the pot's going to cut you off at the knees eventually. It's going to make it very difficult to keep this level of motivation going.

1:14:33🔗 Adam All right.

1:14:34🔗 Drew Just is.

1:14:34🔗 Adam All right. Well, look, he goes out, does his work. He goes home at some point.

1:14:37🔗 Drew No, no, it's fine. Listen, whatever. I'm not the man.

1:14:40🔗 Adam We're not uptight, dude.

1:14:41🔗 Drew But he just he's got to prepare for that. That's going to eventually have an effect. All right.

1:14:45🔗 Adam Or or curtail it a little bit.

1:14:49🔗 Drew Yeah. But it's really it doesn't work like that. People love it the way he does. It's really hard for them to start.

1:14:54🔗 Adam He said he used to smoke it twice. He used to wake and bake and then he stopped doing that.

1:14:59🔗 Drew Yeah. But to stop to really knock it way down, it's very hard for them.

1:15:02🔗 Adam Jason.

1:15:03🔗 Yeah.

1:15:04🔗 Adam Do you think you could not smoke pot for a week?

1:15:07🔗 You know what? I've been asked that question before. I think I could.

1:15:11🔗 Drew One week and that would be it for the rest of his life.

1:15:13🔗 Adam It's a bad sign that you've been asked.

1:15:15🔗 Emily Procter I was going to say, someone's asked you that question before.

1:15:17🔗 Caller The answer might not be good.

1:15:18🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:15:19🔗 But you know what though? In high school it was every day and then in college it was every day. And I've definitely been able to calm it down to once a day.

1:15:28🔗 Adam What do you do? Hold on. In high school it was every day and now it's just down to once a day?

1:15:35🔗 Drew It's just down to every day.

1:15:36🔗 Adam By the way, I'd love to see your recruitment, and you speaking in front of a guy. Dude, you guys got to, yeah, I got to main change this. Tell you what, right now, it's just like Jerry Garcia used to say, hey, and what about when you travel, where do you get the weed?

1:15:53🔗 You know, I have from home. I bring.

1:15:55🔗 Drew No, no, no, Adam literally wants to know where you stash it.

1:15:57🔗 Adam Where you travel, like how do you travel with the weed?

1:16:00🔗 I have a medicine jar.

1:16:02🔗 Drew Well, Adam's got his opened up right there at the airport.

1:16:04🔗 Adam Oh, I got to tell you, man.

1:16:06🔗 Drew Do we take our break? I can't remember.

1:16:07🔗 Adam No, I don't know.

1:16:08🔗 Drew Did we take a 20?

1:16:09🔗 Adam No, we didn't. I was in Vegas a few weeks back for a bachelor party and some guy who was evidently the drug dealer guy of the party gave me a righteous joint right when I left. He just said, here's a big fat spleef for you. And I looked at it and I was like, well, it's four in the morning and I'm drunk, so I think I'll be going to bed, but I'm leaving in the morning. I'm not gonna flush the joint down the toilet. It's a perfectly good joint, you know? I might smoke this when I get home. I don't really smoke pot, but I like to have a joint around if I'm having a party or something, you know, I got some cool Hollywood friends want to come over and talk out, so be it. So I was like, I'm not gonna throw this thing away. But then I thought, I don't want to drag it through the airport either. And then I thought, you know what, F the man. Who cares? This guy gave me this joint. I'm bringing it home. I'm not doing anything. I pay a ton of taxes. I'm not a criminal. What the hell? And by the way, it's not a box cutter. I'm just going to throw it. I'll throw it in my medicine bag and I'll throw it in my bag and I'll go and put it in my toiletry bag and I'll get out of here. And then I get to the airport and of course I have the scissors in my toiletry bag and the guy pulls me out of line. The guy pulls me out of line. He's like, oh, we got to open up the bag. And I'm like, oh, Christ, I forgot. And I threw it inside a little aspirin container or something. And luckily he pulled it out, but he didn't put it out there. He didn't open the thing on the table.

1:17:39🔗 Caller All right.

1:17:39🔗 Adam But here's the thing.

1:17:40🔗 Drew We got to imagine that.

1:17:41🔗 Emily Procter No, it sounds awful.

1:17:42🔗 Caller I don't want you to crack yourself.

1:17:44🔗 Adam We got to take a break, but let me tell you why I didn't care and why I thought about it.

1:17:48🔗 Drew Cause you would have been Righteous Indignation. You would have won the fight.

1:17:51🔗 Adam I would like the same.

1:17:52🔗 Emily Procter The name would have been in the paper.

1:17:54🔗 Adam I would like the sane, law-abiding, mega-tax-paying citizens of this country to claim it back from the super right-wing fundamentalist a-holes and the super left-wing attorneys. I want somebody to take a stand in the name of sanity, which is, I'm an adult, I don't have a drug prom, I pay tons of taxes. What is the problem here? Here's the thing, I apply, I'm governed by the laws of sanity, not by your retarded laws. Somebody explain to me why this is wrong, and let's stop running scared when we're not actually criminals, because some idiot decided something should be illegal when it really shouldn't be. Can we please do that?

1:18:38🔗 Emily Procter Can I ask a question?

1:18:39🔗 Adam Yes.

1:18:39🔗 Emily Procter If your children were to try pot, what would you feel about it?

1:18:46🔗 Drew It depends.

1:18:47🔗 Adam Let's answer that when we come back to her. That's a provocative question. All right. He's already given them QALYs, but that was ground up in their milk.

1:18:54🔗 Drew Just to make them happy.

1:18:55🔗 Adam We'll take a quick break. Emily Proctor here tonight from CSI Miami. We'll be right back after this. Yeah, buddy, it's Loveline, I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, Emily Proctor's here tonight from CSI Miami. Watch my show tonight at midnight. Too late.

1:19:43🔗 Emily Procter I watched your show, and I didn't even know I was gonna be on here. And I had some very weird hallucination that you were talking about your second child being born.

1:19:53🔗 Adam What the?

1:19:56🔗 Emily Procter You're wearing a burgundy sweater.

1:19:58🔗 Adam I'll tell you, watch Steve-O go insane, attack me, and destroy the glass table.

1:20:04🔗 Drew What do you do? What do you explain to your viewing audience?

1:20:07🔗 Adam Well, they can see what's going on.

1:20:09🔗 Drew But do you take a break? Or do you just go right to?

1:20:14🔗 Adam We'll be back.

1:20:14🔗 Emily Procter You dress sort of formal on the show, though.

1:20:17🔗 Adam Yeah, to make you look nice. Yeah, I clean up.

1:20:22🔗 I kind of like this, though, to be honest.

1:20:24🔗 Adam The casual look? Yeah.

1:20:26🔗 Drew You get that in the TLC show. Don't worry.

1:20:28🔗 Emily Procter Yeah, TLC.

1:20:29🔗 Emily Procter I am very excited to see that. Because construction makes you bonkers. It makes one bonkers. It makes me bonkers. And has your dad ever done it before?

1:20:42🔗 Adam Oh, Emily does a little house flipping herself. In the TLC show, I buy my dad's old house. My dad knows less about construction than aborted babies. Yes.

1:20:55🔗 Emily Procter Because I have always found, drink that in. Even if you love it, I can't wait to watch that show. Because even though I love it, and I do, there's something that happened psychologically in the beginning that's just feral. It's just like there's all of this just sort of mishegas that's just happening.

1:21:12🔗 Adam Yes, it can be.

1:21:13🔗 Drew What do you say to this mishegas?

1:21:15🔗 Adam It can be intimidating for the lay people. My promise is I'm too confident. I don't see anything as being a problem.

1:21:21🔗 Drew Has anyone bought it yet?

1:21:23🔗 Adam Has anyone bought my false confidence?

1:21:25🔗 Drew The house.

1:21:25🔗 Adam Oh, the house. No, not sold it yet. Working on it. Working hard on it. No, my dad does no construction of anything.

1:21:32🔗 Drew He's not involved with this at all.

1:21:33🔗 Adam He's not involved. I just bought the house and kicked him out and then tore it up.

1:21:37🔗 Emily Procter Okay. You just gutted it or?

1:21:39🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:21:40🔗 Drew Pretty much.

1:21:41🔗 Adam Oh no, it's gutted.

1:21:43🔗 We got to take a break pretty much.

1:21:44🔗 Adam We got to take a break, Mike?

1:21:46🔗 Emily Procter This is fascinating.

1:21:48🔗 Adam You're 20?

1:21:49🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:21:50🔗 Adam What's up?

1:21:51🔗 Caller Well, first I just want to say Adam, you're a god. I love your new show too.

1:21:55🔗 Adam Thanks. You watch Steve-O go insane and attack me tonight.

1:21:59🔗 Caller Okay. Yeah. Well. All right.

1:22:00🔗 Adam What's up?

1:22:02🔗 Caller Yeah. I have a spinal injury and the only way to get my sexuality back is to use speed.

1:22:08🔗 Drew Strangely, Mike sounds like Jimmy from South Park. Doesn't he?

1:22:13🔗 Adam Why? Well, what? Why does he have a spinal? Why do you have a spinal injury, Mike?

1:22:17🔗 Caller What happened?

1:22:19🔗 Caller I fell three stories.

1:22:21🔗 Adam And are you are you know, are you paraplegic, quadriplegic?

1:22:24🔗 Drew You will.

1:22:24🔗 Caller Yeah. I'm considered quadriplegic.

1:22:26🔗 Drew Quadriplegic.

1:22:27🔗 Adam Are you know, so you're in a wheelchair?

1:22:29🔗 Caller No, no, I'm actually I'm able to walk luckily, but I was in a wheelchair for about three months, three and a half months.

1:22:37🔗 Adam How is your function now? I mean, as far as you know, if I saw you walking, would I know that you'd been injured?

1:22:44🔗 Caller You probably wouldn't. I have some big scars on my neck.

1:22:48🔗 Adam Yeah, that's why I said saw you walking. Like if I saw you walking across the parking lot, would I know that you had been injured?

1:22:55🔗 Caller Probably not.

1:22:56🔗 Drew What did they put in your neck? Stabilizers?

1:22:58🔗 Caller Yeah, well, they removed my C5 and repaired my C4 and they.

1:23:03🔗 Drew Man, are you lucky?

1:23:05🔗 Emily Procter I was going to say, you sound so interesting.

1:23:07🔗 Drew You are so lucky. It's crazy, right?

1:23:10🔗 Caller And they excuse me.

1:23:10🔗 Adam Interesting, like when someone gets attacked by a bear. They're interesting. Yeah, not interesting, like they invented something interesting.

1:23:16🔗 Emily Procter Well, I just, I mean, I can't imagine what it would feel like to fall. What did that feel like?

1:23:22🔗 Caller It was.

1:23:23🔗 Emily Procter I'm sorry.

1:23:24🔗 Adam Like puppies falling out of a.

1:23:26🔗 Emily Procter I know. That was a terrible moment. I said to Marcus when y'all were gone, the moment that I said the thing about the puppies, I truly believed it, which is just so sad.

1:23:37🔗 Adam Oh baby, you're up in your head. You're cool. Don't worry about it.

1:23:40🔗 Emily Procter But no, I don't mean to be flip about it, but it's a feeling that most people will never know.

1:23:48🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, what did you, well, most people that actually jump off the apartment building and hit the swimming pool know what the feeling of falling is. They don't know what the feeling of missing the swimming pool is. You see what I'm saying?

1:23:59🔗 Caller Right.

1:24:00🔗 Adam What did you do, land on your head?

1:24:03🔗 Caller Well, no, I guess I landed on my neck, I guess. That's how my neck got broken. Right. I don't really remember falling. I remember the actual moment before I fell. But-

1:24:16🔗 Emily Procter What did you think?

1:24:18🔗 Adam What were you doing?

1:24:19🔗 Caller I was actually, I was screwing around with my friends on top of an industrial building like down the street from my house. All right. We were drinking and so.

1:24:28🔗 Adam All right.

1:24:28🔗 Caller Alcohol and hypes.

1:24:30🔗 Adam So Mike, now you need speed in order to have your sexual arousal or sensation back?

1:24:37🔗 Caller Well, just overall, like drive, like to get in the mood to do sex or anything.

1:24:44🔗 Adam All right.

1:24:45🔗 Drew Are you on medication otherwise?

1:24:47🔗 Adam That's a good question. Medication?

1:24:49🔗 Caller I'm on Neurontin.

1:24:50🔗 Caller I'm on methadone.

1:24:52🔗 Drew Oh, for God's sakes.

1:24:53🔗 Adam Oh, methadone.

1:24:54🔗 Drew Mike, for Christ's sake. No.

1:24:56🔗 Adam Are you on methadone because you got strung out on some painkillers?

1:25:00🔗 Caller No, I was on OxyContin, but methadone is not.

1:25:03🔗 Drew No, you didn't get strung on painkillers, just on OxyContin. How dare you ask?

1:25:06🔗 Emily Procter A little bit of heroin.

1:25:07🔗 Drew I'm sorry.

1:25:08🔗 Adam I spoke out of turn. I thought you were on painkillers.

1:25:12🔗 Drew People on methadone, that's an opiate, that's a chronic painkiller. People do not get a sex drive on methadone. That's one of the main side of it.

1:25:19🔗 Caller It's 10 milligrams twice a day. That's it. That's a pre-low dose.

1:25:23🔗 Drew That is a pre-low dose, Mike, but 20 will still do that to you.

1:25:25🔗 Adam All right, Mike, baby, baby doll, you've been through enough, and so has your body to be doing methadone and doing speed and doing all this stuff. Baby, we got to ring your sponge a little here and start with some clean water. Your bucket's dirty. You know what I'm saying? Look, it's like when you got a mop in a dirty bucket and all of a sudden you're just taking dirt and putting it back on the floor. You got to rinse that thing every once in a while.

1:25:49🔗 Drew This whole problem he has as a result of his alcoholism.

1:25:52🔗 Adam Yeah, he was drunk, he fell off something, then he's on methadone and speed. I mean, come on, baby doll, you're 20. Let's go now. Let's focus. And here's the deal, here's the deal. You dodged a bullet. You could be Christopher Reeves right now. Thank God you're not. Now let's stop taunting your maker.

1:26:12🔗 Drew If you keep with the addiction, there will yet be another round.

1:26:15🔗 Adam You have another accident or you will just, your heart will stop. Let's go. You got a new lease on life. Don't F up the lease. All right, we'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

1:26:27🔗 Caller Thank you for calling Loveline.

1:26:28🔗 Caller Your call will be answered in the order it seems interesting.

1:26:52🔗 Adam Now we gotta move ahead. Hey, everybody, Emily Procter is here. Drew, remind me to talk more about that during the next break. You ever heard of talk about construction?

1:27:02🔗 Drew Now we gotta move ahead.

1:27:03🔗 Emily Procter Yeah, gotta move ahead.

1:27:04🔗 Emily Procter We also never answered, I never got the answer that maybe I would love to get.

1:27:09🔗 Adam About your belly?

1:27:10🔗 Emily Procter If your children smoke pot, what would that be?

1:27:12🔗 Emily Procter Oh, yeah, that one.

1:27:13🔗 Drew That one about to happen.

1:27:14🔗 Adam Emily knows way better than we do.

1:27:17🔗 Drew I would be very anxious about it. I would create consequences for it to make it clear.

1:27:22🔗 Adam What would the consequences be?

1:27:23🔗 Drew I don't know. You know, the restrictions are very tired of driving privileges.

1:27:27🔗 Adam Limit them to only 700 channels of TV.

1:27:29🔗 Drew I would, 700 channels of TV. I would.

1:27:31🔗 Adam They're toking out right now.

1:27:32🔗 Drew I would bring out the urine toxicology cups.

1:27:35🔗 Adam Oh, Drew. Yeah, seriously. Let me tell you something about Drew, Emily.

1:27:42🔗 Emily Procter It's not fooling around.

1:27:43🔗 Adam No, Drew is often thought about drug testing and stands by that for the children. And my feeling is, is let them get in the trouble and then you can drug test them.

1:27:56🔗 Drew When you get in trouble, then you get treatment.

1:27:58🔗 Adam The preemptive drug. Well, find a joint. You know what I mean? When a kid's 15, don't do the preemptive strike on the drug testing. I think that freaks the kids out.

1:28:07🔗 Emily Procter Yeah, I would say that might be slightly fascist.

1:28:09🔗 Adam Yeah, it's only fascist.

1:28:11🔗 Drew It actually, in terms of looking at what works, it works.

1:28:15🔗 Adam Let me explain this, Drew. Don't get into this cycle where you go, look, it's for their own good, and I'm gonna do whatever it takes, and if I'm not the world's, look, if I don't make some fans, I don't care. Don't hide behind that.

1:28:32🔗 Drew If they had diabetes, you check, you check. There's blood sugar. This is the only objective screen we have.

1:28:39🔗 Adam Except for, you don't know they have diabetes.

1:28:42🔗 Drew Right. So you have to screen.

1:28:43🔗 Adam So you don't. You have to wait till they show a symptom, and then you find out they have diabetes.

1:28:47🔗 Drew Well, no, no, then you got addiction. That's a whole different thing.

1:28:50🔗 Adam Well, I'm saying, you don't, right now, they don't, you don't have to check them for diabetes.

1:28:54🔗 Drew No, I wouldn't check them. And you said if they-

1:28:55🔗 Adam You're saying they have diabetes.

1:28:57🔗 Drew No, you said if they used-

1:28:57🔗 Adam I'm saying you don't know they have diabetes.

1:28:59🔗 Drew If they used.

1:28:59🔗 Adam Oh, if they used.

1:29:00🔗 Drew That's what she asked me. How would you feel about-

1:29:02🔗 Adam You're going to screen anyway.

1:29:03🔗 Drew No, no, no. I may pull it out as a threat, but I'm not going to do it.

1:29:09🔗 Adam You know what Drew's going to do?

1:29:10🔗 Emily Procter What are the odds that they will?

1:29:12🔗 Drew They will what?

1:29:12🔗 Emily Procter That they will try it.

1:29:13🔗 Adam A thousand percent, maybe higher.

1:29:16🔗 Drew The question is what age and that kind of stuff. And then whether or not it becomes a problem.

1:29:19🔗 Adam I'll tell you what Drew's going to do. Drew is going to take a shoe box, cover it with foil. He's going to take duct tape, put on it, and he's going to write Weed-O-Meter on it. And he's going to hook a vacuum post to it. And he's going to walk. He's going to have a battery in a red light. And he's going to walk through them. This detects weed. So if you have any, just bring it out now. Because the Weed-O-Meter cannot be beaten. And he's going to walk around. It's going to be making weird noises. And hopefully the kids will just fast up.

1:29:44🔗 Drew I like that.

1:29:45🔗 Adam That's all you need.

1:29:46🔗 Drew I don't like that.

1:29:47🔗 Adam That's all you need.

1:29:48🔗 Drew But anyway, I'm not going to get into lengthy discussions about struggles over it. I'm really not.

1:29:55🔗 Emily Procter Well, I just think it would be, it's such a passionate topic for you. I think it's an interesting question, having teenage children.

1:30:00🔗 Drew That's not going to be a struggle. My thing is all about you create structure, you bring the axe down, you stand back.

1:30:06🔗 Emily Procter There are rules.

1:30:07🔗 Drew And you let the kids pull the axe down on their head if they want. That's up to them.

1:30:09🔗 Adam That's right.

1:30:10🔗 Drew It's up to them.

1:30:11🔗 Adam Then the eating disorder and the therapy comes. I hate you, dad. I hate you.

1:30:15🔗 Caller I wish you were dead.

1:30:16🔗 Drew Just my job.

1:30:17🔗 Adam I can't stand here. Why can't you die?

1:30:20🔗 Emily Procter Kristen?

1:30:22🔗 Caller Hi.

1:30:23🔗 Adam Kristen?

1:30:24🔗 Yes.

1:30:25🔗 Adam What's up? Uh-oh. What happened to you?

1:30:28🔗 Nothing. She said hi.

1:30:30🔗 Emily Procter You didn't hear.

1:30:31🔗 Adam Sexual abuse?

1:30:34🔗 No, just physical.

1:30:36🔗 Adam Physical abuse. All right. I hear that in your voice.

1:30:39🔗 Drew That one in one thousand.

1:30:40🔗 Hey, can you catch flesh-eating bacteria from cutting yourself?

1:30:46🔗 Drew Definitely.

1:30:47🔗 Adam Yeah. That's how they do it. That's how you get it.

1:30:50🔗 Oh, wow.

1:30:52🔗 Drew You can get all kinds of infections. Every time you violate your skin, that's opening yourself to infection, one of them could be the end of flesh-eating.

1:30:58🔗 Adam Do you cut yourself?

1:31:00🔗 Drew By the way, whatever. By the way, the flesh-eating bacteria just as prevalent as ever been. Do you hear about it every day?

1:31:07🔗 Adam Something happened to flesh-eating bacteria.

1:31:09🔗 Drew It became what it's always been.

1:31:10🔗 Adam Mad Cow and Killer Mold all have taken a back seat to 10,000 dead in New Orleans and a carnage in the Superdome.

1:31:18🔗 Drew Or whatever.

1:31:19🔗 Adam Yeah, whatever. That's why everyone has to not buy into whatever the scared du jour is. Please, please do not listen. It could be 10,000 is a conservative estimate.

1:31:31🔗 Drew Then they got to the waters, insanely polluted, horrible pathogens.

1:31:36🔗 Emily Procter Just a side note on that topic is, my boyfriend was on the JetBlue plane and he said it was-

1:31:41🔗 Drew No way.

1:31:42🔗 Emily Procter Yeah. He said it was fast. What? With the landing gear. I had a week last week. But he said it was interesting to watch the correspondents on the television and to be inside the plane.

1:31:53🔗 Drew Then making such a huge deal out of it.

1:31:55🔗 Emily Procter Yeah. It was a huge deal. It's very traumatic, but just the misinformation.

1:32:00🔗 Adam Well, here's the thing too. JetBlue is about the only thing that has satellite television so you can actually watch yourself flying around.

1:32:06🔗 Emily Procter Yeah.

1:32:08🔗 Drew What did the pilot say to them before they landed?

1:32:10🔗 Emily Procter His stories about it were, I think, fascinating and I thought the pilot seemed like an amazing guy. At one point he came on and he said, look, I know that you all are scared and I just want you to know that this is what I do and I'm going to put her down.

1:32:27🔗 Drew My friends or pilots said this is something they prepare for. It's not that hard to do.

1:32:31🔗 Emily Procter Kristen?

1:32:33🔗 Adam Sorry. I don't want to cut Emily off.

1:32:37🔗 Emily Procter No, I'm sorry.

1:32:38🔗 Caller It's about four seconds.

1:32:39🔗 Adam I know. I love the fact that your boyfriend was on the plane. I talked about for an hour except we have three seconds left.

1:32:44🔗 Drew Kristen, the fact is you're a cutter. You were even physically abused. That needs to be dealt with. Eventually, yes, you will get some sort of horrible infection.

1:32:51🔗 Adam So please.

1:32:52🔗 What? You remember that girl who wanted to be a Vilemic or InuXlic?

1:32:57🔗 Drew Yes.

1:32:58🔗 It's me.

1:33:00🔗 Adam Okay, baby doll. Good. Is it bogus? Hold on. Jenna. Jenna, we're going to put you on hold. Yeah. Put you on hold. We'll talk to you first tomorrow. She's been on hold for 55 minutes. I feel bad whenever we did talk to her. Sorry, Jenna. Just hang tight. Do not hang up on her. We'll get her first tomorrow night. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. Yeah, buddy, that's it.

1:34:02🔗 Drew I'll have a laugh with Emily Procter. Yes, indeed. iPod Now is again tomorrow night, and plus 10 free downloads from iTunes.

1:34:07🔗 Adam Emily Procter, CSI, 10 o'clock, CBS, Monday nights, and watch Steve Ogo and saying on my Comedy Central TV show about now. So until next time, it's Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying Mahalo.

1:34:27🔗 This has been Loveline.

1:34:31🔗 Adam The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Aningold.

1:34:41🔗 Emily Procter Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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