Sunday, September 18, 2005

0:57🔗 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Listener discretion is advised. This is Loveline.

1:17🔗 Adam With Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew sets a new personal best in the mic slugging department.

1:27🔗 Drew If I didn't hit it, that would just be grabbing it.

1:29🔗 Adam Well, it still made a thud.

1:31🔗 Drew A little thud, yeah.

1:31🔗 Adam Let me check what the judge is. As long as it was an audible impact, it counts as mic abuse. Yeah, Drew's personal best was set in, I think it was April of 99. It was 3.7 seconds into the show. This can't be measured by instruments that we have.

1:51🔗 Drew We have to send it to the lab.

1:52🔗 Adam Yeah, Drew, you punched a mic one millionth of a second after it heated up. Usually, you wait at least eight seconds. Trapped is our band that's in studio tonight. Chris and Monte both here representing. Someone who controls the name of the new CD which just came out last Tuesday, because that was the 13th, am I right?

2:13🔗 You got it.

2:15🔗 Adam I ask this every time and I'm not sure when Tuesday became the official release day of records, but it couldn't have been going on for 20 years.

2:24🔗 Drew It's got like three years, two years even.

2:27🔗 Adam Yeah, but that means it's been 11 years and you're going to freak out.

2:30🔗 Drew Easily could be though.

2:31🔗 Adam You guys have any idea when this began?

2:33🔗 I think I remember asking around the label and I don't think anybody.

2:35🔗 Drew You've asked about it for three years and no one's given a satisfactory answer.

2:39🔗 Adam Well, is it is a kid? You remember waiting like like Drew as a kid? You do you remember waiting for Guy Lombardo's record to drop? Glenn Miller's Glenn Miller's record to drop in the 40s. Is that a Tuesday you were waiting?

2:53🔗 Drew No, it was variable.

2:55🔗 Adam It varied. Right.

2:56🔗 Drew Yeah.

2:57🔗 Adam Yeah.

2:57🔗 Drew Yeah.

2:57🔗 Trapt Yeah, I don't think I've ever bought a record like right the day it came out.

3:00🔗 Adam It's a weird thing.

3:02🔗 Trapt Yeah, it means you variety or something. Yeah, it was a Friday.

3:06🔗 Adam Yeah, it seems like if payday is Friday, that's when you're going to do it. Everything ought to come out on payday.

3:11🔗 Trapt Yeah.

3:11🔗 Adam What's Tuesday? I mean, like if I'm coming out with something, my thing is when do people get paid? Friday. We drop it Friday night.

3:18🔗 Trapt Yeah.

3:18🔗 Adam Let them get drunk and then let them drop their money on my crappy product. It's not your crappy product. I'm talking about my, my crappy product. I don't mean you have a crap. You know what I'm saying.

3:28🔗 Drew I actually remember when Led Zeppelin Houses of the Holy came out.

3:32🔗 Adam Did you wait in line?

3:34🔗 Drew No, but I remember it being a big deal and I could swear it was a Friday.

3:37🔗 Adam Yeah.

3:38🔗 Drew Yeah. I could swear it was a Friday.

3:39🔗 Adam It was, well, it was an event. It was like a movie premiere. So like movies would come out on, would come out on a Friday and so should records.

3:47🔗 Trapt Yep.

3:48🔗 Adam Yeah.

3:48🔗 Trapt All right.

3:49🔗 Adam You guys got to do another record. You got to call it Houses of the Holy-er and you release it on a Friday.

3:56🔗 Trapt We will. Next one.

3:57🔗 Adam Yeah. And they're like, well, we'll only release on Tuesday and you'll be like, we'll just do it the following Friday. That way, it's like four days late. Yes. You know what I mean? Like three days late. Yeah. Cool. The band's going to be at the Avalon in Hollywood on November the 12th. And tickets are still available through Ticketmaster and what else? debut record, two million copies.

4:20🔗 Drew Wow.

4:20🔗 Adam That's a lot.

4:21🔗 Drew Huge.

4:21🔗 Adam That's platinum. That's double platinum. Is that double platinum?

4:25🔗 Trapt Yeah.

4:25🔗 Adam Platinum's a million, right? Yes. Double platinum.

4:29🔗 Trapt It's amazing.

4:30🔗 Drew It's awesome.

4:31🔗 Adam Did you want to say something?

4:32🔗 Drew Just wondering if we need to announce this Cry Wolf thing at this point.

4:34🔗 Adam No, we don't, goofball. Don't you remember producer Anne?

4:38🔗 Drew Well, she's on line seven there, even though they haven't written it up. Oh, really? Yeah. No, not on line seven. There you go. Okay. Then don't.

4:44🔗 Adam Drew, you ever get tired of being wrong?

4:46🔗 Drew Never. Why would I keep doing it if I got tired of it?

4:49🔗 Adam You would make a horrible animal. You know why you'd make a horrible animal? Because all animals have is their instinct.

4:57🔗 Drew Right, right, right.

4:57🔗 Adam And all you have is a book. Do you know what I'm saying? Your instincts are horrible. No, no, you're a smart guy.

5:04🔗 Drew My instincts got smashed long ago.

5:07🔗 Adam But you don't know they got smashed. Oh, no, yes, they do. Well, stop relying on something that got backed over by your parents in 1972.

5:14🔗 Drew That's part of the problem. When things make sense, you just go barrel ahead. Even your instincts go, no, you have no instincts. What's left of them?

5:22🔗 Adam Drew, you have no instincts. You're a fine doctor. You make a horrible raccoon. Do you understand? And I say that with love. Well, some people rely on their instincts. Drew relies on his textbooks. Yeah. All right. Whatever works. Yeah. Whatever works. Look at him. He drives a beautiful car, has got a beautiful family. Obviously, everything works. Just do not rely on their instincts. Like if we over go camping and get lost, then you'll really see it come apart. I will say, Drew, now take this map and take this compass. Which way should we go? No, which way do we go? And then you point south and I go, fine, we're going north.

6:02🔗 Drew Interesting you would say that. I went with a friend through Europe when I was in medical school and it got to the point where, no joke, every time he'd ask me which way, he'd go the opposite way. You'd be right nine out of ten times.

6:13🔗 Adam No, it's perfect. I could take you to the track. I could win some money.

6:17🔗 Drew Oh, gambling.

6:19🔗 Adam Yeah, gambling with Drew. You know, having someone who knows what's right is good, but having someone who knows who's gonna lose by virtue of thinking they're gonna win, that's just as good.

6:31🔗 Drew It's a little different. It's not quite as good because I just know who's not gonna win. I don't necessarily know who's gonna lose. You know what I'm saying? It's a little bit trickier.

6:40🔗 Adam I still wanna know like when the Super Bowl comes around, I wanna know who do you like? Who do you like?

6:44🔗 Drew Who do you like? Let's do this too. Right.

6:46🔗 Trapt We just gotta bring in the roulette table.

6:50🔗 Adam Yeah. The only problem with that stuff is once you recognize it, it seems to go away.

6:55🔗 Drew Then it works against you.

6:56🔗 Adam Well, because you're such a perpetual loser.

6:59🔗 Drew You gotta lose.

6:59🔗 Adam You can't win even when we think of it. And then speaking of the... And then I say this with great love and admiration.

7:07🔗 You guys neighbors?

7:09🔗 Drew Oh, you see how he treats his neighbors.

7:11🔗 Adam The other thing... Holy Christ. Well, they started it. I just finished it. Here's the other thing I always think is interesting, too. Speaking of the Super Bowl, I remember a few years back, they did that thing where they say whoever wins the Xbox game and, you know, they play that two players from each team play each other like Xbox a couple of days before. The winner of that's 111 Super Bowls in a row.

7:34🔗 Drew Nice.

7:35🔗 Adam This was Tampa playing Oakland and San Diego a few years back. Well, whoever won ended up losing the Super Bowl. And then that went into when the Washington Redskins went at home, the incumbent president doesn't get reelected. It's gone this way for a thousand years.

7:51🔗 Drew Then that goes away.

7:52🔗 Adam And the whole thing about these things that are never wrong, once you shine the light on them, they always go wrong. They have to keep going, but you can't notice them.

8:02🔗 Drew Right.

8:03🔗 Adam Do you know what I'm saying?

8:04🔗 Drew Right. And the crazy thing is once they go, once they're not 100 percent, we let them go completely.

8:09🔗 Adam Yeah, the whole thing. I mean, remember the whole Bush election thing? The election was the Monday after the Skins played at RFK, and the Skins have won the last whatever with the incumbent thing. It's gone on since McKinley. And boom, the Skins lost, and it's like, oh, good, Bush is out. No, Bush is in. So once you figure it out, it goes away. Trapped, instituted, who ironically feels trapped by this conversation. It's still the dialogue I'm going at them. But it's heavy, right?

8:42🔗 Trapt Yeah, it's heavy. It's intellectual.

8:45🔗 Drew Oh, now look.

8:46🔗 Adam All right. Now we have somebody on the air who... Let's put her on hold. Let's take one call.

8:51🔗 Drew All right.

8:52🔗 Adam Pre-MAD.

8:53🔗 Drew Line one.

8:53🔗 Adam Brittany, want to go to line one? Brittany, 16.

8:58🔗 Caller Hello?

8:59🔗 Adam What's up?

9:00🔗 Caller OK, I got like I had a question, but I want to change it. OK, like.

9:11🔗 Drew OK, fantastic. That's what a bogus call sounds like, by the way. That's one of the ways.

9:15🔗 Adam Is that bogus or is it a technical problem?

9:18🔗 Drew No, that's her. Brittany, it's all her. Hello?

9:21🔗 Spit it out.

9:23🔗 Drew Here you go.

9:24🔗 She's getting coaching in the background. Let's do it.

9:28🔗 Caller Just do it.

9:31🔗 Drew Brittany, you going to talk?

9:32🔗 I can't hear my phone.

9:33🔗 Caller Hella cutting out right now. But my question was.

9:37🔗 Drew Is Hella cutting out? Yeah. OK. Here you go.

9:41🔗 Caller OK. I had a problem this weekend with one of my friends. She was making a big deal about how I was acting, but then she really flipped it because she was mad that her boyfriend wasn't with us. But it was like, I don't know, should I tell her? Or because she was watching out for what I was doing this weekend because we went to parties.

10:03🔗 Drew Did anybody understand anything that she had said?

10:07🔗 Trapt What did you do to piss her off?

10:09🔗 Caller OK. Well, I didn't do anything, but, you know, we're all 16.

10:12🔗 Trapt What did she think you did?

10:13🔗 Caller It's my friend's 17th birthday. We all were just acting dumb and we were doing whatever, right? And she got mad because her boyfriend didn't stay with us. But then she took it out and.

10:27🔗 Drew Britney's all class.

10:28🔗 Adam She is just look. Here's what I like to do sometimes.

10:34🔗 Caller I would like to question in there.

10:36🔗 Adam And here's what I'd like to build a time machine for. I would like to build a time machine for some people that just sort of get through life and get it over with. You know, why?

10:45🔗 Trapt Why? Why?

10:45🔗 Adam All the abusive boyfriends, a couple couple scrapes at the law. You crap out a bunch of kids ultimately hate you. One of them's in the joint. The other goes gay. The chick's stripping.

10:54🔗 Drew Just speed up to that point.

10:55🔗 Adam Just get to the point where you're in a home and you're on your last breath. You know what I mean? Let's just let's cut through all. It's going to be painful. It's going to be ugly. There's going to be domestic violence. It's going to cost taxpayer dollars. Let's just get through it. You know what I mean? I know it sounds morbid and sad, but I'm doing it for Britney. You know what Britney has to look forward to? Junior college, abusive boyfriends, open container arrests, DUIs, kids who were censored.

11:24🔗 Drew Wouldn't the interesting thing to be to try to figure out how we could derail Britney's demise?

11:30🔗 Adam Well, then we use the time machine to go back.

11:33🔗 Drew Or can we show it to her or something?

11:35🔗 Adam Oh, oh, you mean like a Christmas tale. Yeah, yeah.

11:39🔗 Drew Dickens, yeah.

11:39🔗 Adam Yeah, Dickens.

11:43🔗 Caller Dickens.

11:44🔗 Adam Okay, she doesn't know who Dickens is. Britney.

11:47🔗 Caller Yes.

11:49🔗 Adam Are you good looking?

11:50🔗 Caller Yes.

11:52🔗 Adam Shocking, I can tell. What decade did World War II take place in?

11:58🔗 Caller In the 40s.

11:59🔗 Adam Oh, okay. All right.

12:01🔗 Drew Do you have a nice softball to start out with?

12:03🔗 Adam Seemed like a softball, but. You like history. Okay. It's not going to be kind to you, baby.

12:10🔗 Drew If you study it, it might be.

12:12🔗 Adam All right, so look, okay, here's the thing. Before you swear again, you're 16. You hang around with a bunch of girls. You all hate each other. This is what 16 year old girls do. They talk smack and then they cry and then they try to win each other's boyfriends over. And they just go at it constantly.

12:29🔗 Drew Treat each other respectfully. Don't go after your girlfriend's boyfriend's. Realize how your behavior affects other people. Just kind of have a conscience.

12:37🔗 Adam And the other thing too is, do not be scared to cut loose the people in your circle that aren't keeping up with the communal effort. It's a kibbutz you're all living on. And if somebody's not pulling their own weight, go ahead and toss them. You know that thing where it's like, oh, she stabs everyone in the back and she screws everyone over and she's two-faced, but she's our best friend and we have to put up with it. Don't put up with it. And I'll tell you right now, these people you think you're gonna know for the rest of your life, God willing, you're not gonna know these people when you're in your 30s. Start trimming the fat. Start trimming it now. Drew, if your wife let you hang out with other people, you wouldn't be hanging out with some of these idiots you went to high school with, would you?

13:20🔗 Drew No.

13:21🔗 Adam That's a hypothetical. I know. It's a pretty big hypothetical.

13:23🔗 Drew No, I don't have to think real hard about it.

13:24🔗 Adam Pretty big hypothetical there. No, there's people you know from high school that turned out to be pretty good, and then there's the rest of them. Cut them loose. Move forward.

13:35🔗 Trapt Yeah. That's a good advice there.

13:38🔗 Adam Cut your losses. Everyone thinks it's gonna go on forever. It's not. All right. Now, there's a Brittany.

13:45🔗 Drew Another Brittany.

13:45🔗 Adam Another Brittany who we spoke to last week.

13:51🔗 Drew I think on Wednesday.

13:52🔗 Adam I think on Wednesday who won the competition to go see who where.

13:57🔗 Drew She doesn't know this. You're about to tell her.

13:59🔗 Adam Brittany? Yes? You're going to Europe, baby doll.

14:02🔗 Caller Are you joking me?

14:04🔗 Adam No, you're in. No, I'm not joking you. No, I'm not. But if you say joking me again, I will hang up on you and find someone who speaks English.

14:14🔗 Caller Oh, my gosh.

14:15🔗 Adam Yes, this is exciting. Yeah, I know you're calling from Long Beach and Prague, Long Beach, about the same place, but it still should be fun.

14:24🔗 Drew Again, you're going to fall. You can see Block Party wherever they are playing in Europe. And we had last week had the list of their concert appearances here and I don't see it right now. Huge. You can select from almost any city in Europe. It's crazy.

14:35🔗 Adam Yeah, they're doing an extensive European tour and you pick the city you would most like to see them in. And then who knows, maybe even sneak on to the bus and give them more.

14:47🔗 Drew This was the grand combination of a dream. This is all in homage to the Cry Wolf film.

14:54🔗 Adam Yes.

14:55🔗 Drew Yes.

14:55🔗 Caller Oh my gosh.

14:57🔗 Drew Now, Brittany, what did we talk to you about last week?

15:00🔗 Caller Um, about an ex-boyfriend.

15:03🔗 Drew And what happened? We were trying to resurrect the call.

15:06🔗 Adam It wasn't good.

15:07🔗 Drew Yeah.

15:08🔗 Adam Oh, she was screwing around on him. Could you, were you the one who couldn't stop?

15:13🔗 Caller No, no, not me.

15:14🔗 Adam Which one were you?

15:15🔗 No, okay.

15:17🔗 Caller It was, I was with, I think the call was on Wednesday at about like 11, but it was my ex-boyfriend. And he cheated on me twice with two other men. And we were just, and our question was like, does he ever change?

15:32🔗 Adam All right, you had the bye, you had the bye boyfriend.

15:35🔗 Trapt You need to just get out of that one.

15:36🔗 Adam Right.

15:37🔗 Trapt Just forget about that.

15:38🔗 Caller And the funny thing is, is I had to actually get up because I was sitting right next to him.

15:44🔗 Adam Yeah. No, you need to get out of there. And I don't know if they're going anywhere in Italy, but you should go to Italy and find yourself a real man. They don't allow gays there.

15:52🔗 Trapt Just go shopping.

15:53🔗 Caller I'm planning on it. I'm so planning on it. All right.

15:56🔗 Adam So you've won the cry wolf people are going to send you to Europe. God love you, Brittany.

16:01🔗 Caller Oh, thank you so much.

16:03🔗 Drew Let us call back. Let us know how it was. All right?

16:05🔗 Caller Oh, for sure.

16:06🔗 Drew All right.

16:07🔗 Adam And what's the phrase that pays? Drew, why don't we have a phrase that pays? Every other show has a phrase that then pays. We have nothing.

16:18🔗 Drew We have none of any funky sound effects. We get the nice victory music. We got that.

16:24🔗 Adam But where is our phrase that pays?

16:27🔗 Drew We can make it up right now.

16:29🔗 Adam We don't have anything on this show. We should be working on Rocktober and September right now. You know what I mean? We're in September. We're moving toward Rocktober. There's the phrase that pays.

16:39🔗 Drew 100 micrograms of ethanol estradiol.

16:42🔗 Caller Ethanol estradiol.

16:46🔗 Drew It's the levonogestrel.

16:48🔗 Trapt And where is levonogestrel?

16:50🔗 Drew Or the newethendron.

16:52🔗 Caller No, ethendron.

16:53🔗 Adam Put that whiffle ball back down.

16:55🔗 Drew Come in the house.

16:57🔗 Caller So behind, I'm sick of these kids, man.

17:00🔗 Adam It's David Allen Grier converting Drew's morning after pills or actually birth control pills into black children's names. So I guess that would be the phrase that pays on this show.

17:13🔗 Drew Northendron, get in the house.

17:15🔗 Adam Yeah. Who do you want to talk to, Drew?

17:17🔗 Drew All right, up here. Up here? I bet you're part of the panel.

17:19🔗 Adam All right. We'll hear a trap song in a minute too. John?

17:24🔗 Caller Hey, how are you doing?

17:25🔗 Adam Twenty. What's going on?

17:27🔗 Caller Yeah. Anyhow, I am up here in Berkeley and my roommate is a pre-med student who's usually a very intelligent, reputable guy. And he came home with what I am considering and I'm running by you guys here to be just an utterly nutty story about how if you soak your scrotum in like not boiling but very hot water for, I guess it's every day for a month and weekly, it can prevent spermitogenesis from occurring and essentially be like an unpleasantly effective but you know, fairly effective form of birth control.

18:01🔗 Drew You can drop your sperm count. You can't reliably use it as a contraceptive.

18:05🔗 Adam But it would help, right?

18:06🔗 Trapt You can wear tighty-whities too.

18:08🔗 Drew Right. It might, yeah. I mean it might...

18:11🔗 Adam Maybe he's just making the world's worst tea.

18:14🔗 Drew That's a bad...

18:16🔗 Caller Well, I have to deal with my scrotum in a mason jar.

18:20🔗 Drew Oh, so that's a bogus call.

18:22🔗 Adam That's a bogus call, but...

18:24🔗 Drew But something that's a reasonable question.

18:27🔗 Adam I mean, you know, they say, you know, when you're trying to have kids, you shouldn't wear the tight underpants.

18:32🔗 Drew When you're trying to optimize fertility, you want to sort of get sperm countertide.

18:35🔗 Adam Obviously, but let's use that logic and keep going with it.

18:38🔗 Drew But there's sort of a... There's an optimal fertility, and then there's infertility. That's not a...

18:44🔗 Adam No, I understand that, but what about... Instead of heating them, what about, you know, microwaves or putting them in a paint can shaker or something, you know what I mean? Is there something you could do to the sac, besides, you know, put a rubber band around it? Is there something you could do to the sac, and are they working on that?

19:04🔗 Drew I don't think they're working on doing anything other than chemically affecting the sac, affecting the way it stimulated to produce sperm.

19:10🔗 Adam Right, so there's no hitting it with gamma radiation.

19:14🔗 Drew It's an interesting question, because it's outside the body, so it's a perfect candidate, right? We're just hanging out, we're hitting some rays.

19:20🔗 Adam Well, yeah.

19:21🔗 Drew But it's hard to just hit the sperm or the sperm producing cells.

19:25🔗 Adam Is there, and also, it's sort of the sac is the clip, but is there sperm in the chamber? Is there a bullet chamber?

19:32🔗 Drew There could be, but again, that goes away pretty quickly.

19:36🔗 Adam All I'm saying is could there be such a device that I put my sac into five minutes before lovemaking, it scrambled them, and then I was...

19:45🔗 Drew No, this stuff's all loaded in the seminal vesicles then. Well, actually, it's preloaded. It's getting mixed in then. It's upstream from there. But it's...

19:52🔗 Adam All right, well, let's, you know.

19:53🔗 Drew But the question is, but maybe you, but you know what I don't know? Because with biology, these things don't have like, they don't always fit the story. You know what I mean?

20:00🔗 Adam Right.

20:01🔗 Drew And it seems like you shouldn't be able to do that, but maybe they're just such a small amount of sperm upstream that if you broke the downstream production, maybe that would be enough to prevent fertility. I don't know.

20:11🔗 Adam Well, it'd be nice if you could get on top of a thing that was sort of like a pommel horse, and it glowed green. It had a weird scan light. And then a timer went off, 30 seconds, you dismounted, and for the next two hours, you couldn't get anything pregnant. You know what I mean?

20:31🔗 Drew It'd be awesome.

20:32🔗 Adam Plus it might feel good. It would sell well. It would. Everyone had one of those pommel horses sitting in there. And if you did gymnastics, it'd just be a plus. Yeah, it's just a plus. That's just a plus.

20:43🔗 Drew Okay.

20:44🔗 Adam All right. Should we hear a trap song?

20:46🔗 Drew Let's do it.

20:47🔗 Adam I think we should. This one is called Stand Up. Yeah, trapped everybody. Someone in control, name of the CD, out barely a week. Just about five days or so in stores as we speak. The guy's in studio tonight. Quick question before we go to break with Benjamin, who's 28. Benjamin?

24:58🔗 Drew This is about the sperm issue.

24:59🔗 Adam Right. Benjamin?

25:01🔗 Caller Hey, what's up, what's up guys?

25:02🔗 Adam Hey.

25:03🔗 Caller Word.

25:04🔗 Drew Word. So you have a pommel horse procedure?

25:08🔗 Caller Pommel horse procedure? I think that's actually what it is. I heard about it on a live journal post, one of my friends made, and it was a link to an accredited site. A guy in Australia that has a polymer injection into the seminal vessel that has an positive and negative ions. And when the sperm pass by it, because it coats the inside ring of the seminal vessel, when the sperm pass by it, they're actually stuck to it. So they don't actually go into the reservoir.

25:42🔗 Drew They've done this on humans or on animals?

25:44🔗 Caller On humans.

25:45🔗 Caller Oh, I don't know.

25:47🔗 Drew How do you get it in there?

25:48🔗 Adam How do you get what?

25:49🔗 Drew Seminal vesicles, here's my anatomy book, is way up in there.

25:52🔗 Adam I could get there.

25:53🔗 Caller They injected it. They actually used a syringe.

25:56🔗 Trapt Is it painful?

25:58🔗 Caller As far as I know, no.

26:00🔗 Drew Oh, yes. Oh, please.

26:02🔗 Adam Well, wait a second.

26:03🔗 Caller As far as I know.

26:04🔗 Caller Yeah, I mean, if you're under anesthesia.

26:05🔗 Adam But how long is it effective for?

26:08🔗 Drew They're up here. Look at that.

26:10🔗 Adam You have to go five years.

26:12🔗 Drew And then what the hell happens after that? You get a clogged polymer seminal vesicles.

26:16🔗 Adam It's way up in the ass here.

26:18🔗 Drew I mean, here's your bladder. Here's your rectum. It's right in between the bladder and the rectum. But it's like, it's a good two fingers.

26:27🔗 Trapt And that accelerates prostate cancer.

26:30🔗 Drew Well, prostate's below that. Who knows? We could do the prostate.

26:33🔗 Adam Where would you put the, where would you plunge the needle?

26:35🔗 Drew That's the question. Would you try to go through the urethra and then like through the bladder or something? Would you, would you thread the needle through one of the holes into the vesicle or would you go through the rectum?

26:44🔗 Adam I take the urethra to the 118 and we go to the sloss and cut off.

26:48🔗 Drew And cut a hay?

26:50🔗 Adam And cut a hay. Then we take the four level over to the NADSAC. Now, if the NADSAC, the NADSAC has a hymen line. We could all get into that. But if you don't want a car pool, then we'll just go through the anus.

27:04🔗 Drew Go to the vas deferens.

27:05🔗 Adam And we'll meet you at the vas deferens. Yeah.

27:08🔗 Drew But listen, there's a hole into the whole system from in the seminal vesicles. That's what injects the semen into the urethra. And maybe they just cannulate that. But still, putting a polymer into your seminal vesicles. Yeah.

27:20🔗 Adam So in polymer, a piece of plastic and it's charged?

27:24🔗 Drew Right.

27:25🔗 Adam Is it a liquid form?

27:27🔗 Drew It's a coat, said he said. I don't know. I've been to the coats.

27:29🔗 Trapt The other service really hate condoms.

27:31🔗 Adam Yeah, we.

27:32🔗 Drew Right. That's right.

27:33🔗 Adam Benjamin.

27:34🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

27:35🔗 Adam You say this is out of Australia?

27:37🔗 Caller It was from Australia and they're doing it in Canada now.

27:40🔗 Drew All right.

27:41🔗 Adam Here's the thing. There was a time when this country was great and we used to experiment on prisoners. You know what I mean?

27:47🔗 Drew And one another.

27:48🔗 Adam Now all those ACL ACLU pussies are ruining it for everybody. There was a time when we just pulled prisoners aside. We just got to work on them like we were Germans or something.

27:58🔗 Drew We just lose a few of them per project.

28:00🔗 Adam We used prisoners for everything. We'd build dams. We'd work out new cures to diseases. I'd just like to get back to that day. That's all. Now we get sued if they don't have cable.

28:13🔗 Drew You realize? And the prostitutes and the real thing.

28:17🔗 Adam We got to get conjugal visits. We got to send in a couple of hookers because the guy is a sex addict and he has a note from his doctor. It's awesome. They get to do everything. I'll tell you, the one thing that drives me insane, though, is the one thing. Oh, all right. Let's not even get started. I'm getting fired. Somebody had an idea about two years ago to get DNA swabs from the prisoners on Death Row so that we could clear some of the cases that were on the books. Because as you know...

28:49🔗 Drew Save a little manpower.

28:50🔗 Adam As you know with these guys, if there's a guy on Death Row, there's two choices. Either he's innocent or he's killed a bunch of other people and he's only in there for this one.

29:00🔗 Drew Right.

29:01🔗 Adam Right. So we got a bunch of open cases on the books. We could do away. We could close some of those cases down and give some of the grieving families a little bit of closure if we could get some DNA and realize it's the same DNA that was on the bloody bed sheet in Mississippi four years earlier and that guy's already in the joint. It happens all the time. They're looking for people and the guys locked up in another city in another state doing time for another crime. So this makes perfect sense. You're on Death Row. Get the swamp. Get the thing. Whatever. Who steps in?

29:36🔗 Caller ACLU.

29:37🔗 Adam Not gonna let it happen. How come?

29:40🔗 Drew Well, it's against their right. They have a right to privacy.

29:43🔗 Adam They don't like, whenever the man has a halfway decent idea, they like to get involved and screw things up. But yeah, their thing is, it somehow would be stepping on their rights, their privilege, or whatever.

29:54🔗 Trapt I just don't know how they win. I don't know how. Oh, they win. They must have a lot of influence somewhere.

30:00🔗 Adam Well, basically, I think they just tie things up for long enough that whoever's good idea it was eventually five years later just runs out of steam.

30:08🔗 Drew And I think it's also because the logic of law has been disconnected from the practical issues and the spirit. Completely disconnected from that.

30:17🔗 Adam Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no, that law has turned into, oh, we know OJ did it. It's just they didn't prove it in court, so we're letting them go.

30:24🔗 Drew Right.

30:25🔗 Trapt That's what it is.

30:26🔗 Drew People are just going to technically like everything else in this goddamn culture. Right.

30:30🔗 Adam All right. Trapped in studio tonight. We'll take a quick break. Be right back after this.

30:38🔗 Drew We'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

30:42🔗 Adam Want to dress up your sex life? Visit durx.com. There's sex and then there's Durx. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Chris and Monty here tonight from Tramp. Not enough guys named Monty anymore for my money. That's a rock solid name, Monty.

31:16🔗 Drew True.

31:18🔗 Adam Monty's solid. No young folks being named Monty anymore.

31:22🔗 Drew He'll come back. Yeah. Monty Hall kind of screwed it up for people.

31:26🔗 Adam Drew and I were talking about this on the air. I think it was Thursday where we're talking about the crazy black names. But I was saying, I think those folks are smart because I think they wait and see what the kid looks like and then give him a name. And I think white folks name kids way too far in advance. White couple gets pregnant. They start looking through that book of names. Really, just after the guy pulls out, pow, they go looking at that book of names. And you wouldn't name your dog before you saw it.

31:57🔗 Drew Yeah, you're right.

31:58🔗 Caller You think it would be a big deal if like, you know, you named your kid and then, you know, six, eight months into it, you realize, well, they kind of got a different personality. Maybe switch the name.

32:05🔗 Drew The dog is fluffy if it turns out to be a hairless dog.

32:07🔗 Trapt No one's going to know.

32:08🔗 Adam Right.

32:09🔗 Caller I mean, do you think the kid would even know, though, if you changed his name eight months in?

32:11🔗 Adam No. Well, you wouldn't know at 13, not for my family. I mean, look, here's the thing. Yeah, right. You name your, you decide you're going to name your dog fluffy, not on the way to the pound, after you get to the pound, because you drive home with a Rhodesian Ridgeback named Fluffy, and it doesn't work right. I say wait it out. I say there should be a rule that you can't name your kid until month number six.

32:35🔗 Trapt Or just a trial name for a year or two.

32:37🔗 Adam Yeah, you see how it fits. Lease him a name.

32:40🔗 Trapt Maybe a couple.

32:41🔗 Adam There's a, you know, one of our actresses that we like from Dawson's Creek, Busy Phillips. Her name wasn't Busy. She's a busy kid. She was busy. Now she got a good name. It's her nickname, but it worked.

32:53🔗 Drew Yeah, it worked for her.

32:53🔗 Adam Why make it a nickname? Could have been a real name.

32:55🔗 Drew You're right. I know a real name. Agnes Gertrude. What was her real name?

33:04🔗 Adam Labia. No, I don't know what her real name is. Her point is-

33:09🔗 Drew Leave it a gestural.

33:10🔗 Adam Leave it a gestural. Let's take a look at the kid for six months, then decide.

33:15🔗 Drew You know, I was just urinating here, thinking about that seminal vesicle, polymer.

33:19🔗 Adam Monte, rock solid. Let me tell you Monte's sight unseen. Even though this Monte looks like a Monte-

33:24🔗 Drew It'll work no matter what.

33:25🔗 Adam It's gonna work. It's gonna work. That's right. Go ahead. Or I saw Jimmy's friend Elliot today, no more Elliot than Elliot. You know what I'm saying? Glasses, nebbish looking. Maybe naming him Elliot turned him into Elliot.

33:41🔗 Drew I think there's some of that that goes on. I do.

33:43🔗 Adam Yeah, it's like these A-holes. I remember a few years back, we were looking for Jesse James. He was a fugitive from law. I think we caught up to him a few months ago. He was killing people. I wanted to sue his parents. If you would have named your kid Elliot instead of Jesse James, we'd have a CPA running around, not a murderer.

34:01🔗 Drew That's right. You go. Anyway, these seminal vesicle polymers you stick in there. I started thinking, you know, just putting a needle, forget injecting something in, but just getting a needle into your tube, into your seminal vesicle, you could have symptoms the rest of your life. You could never be the same.

34:16🔗 Trapt I would never do that.

34:17🔗 Drew And then putting some foreign substances.

34:19🔗 Caller I was waiting for the mason jar comment to come down anytime.

34:23🔗 Drew I think it makes sense that there's something like that that goes, that's in research out there, but I wouldn't want to do that.

34:28🔗 Trapt Yeah, well, again, just use a damn condom. Yeah, let's talk a big deal.

34:33🔗 Adam Let's talk to Jackie, who's 19, Jackie.

34:37🔗 Hey, is there a possibility that you can't, don't use my name when you put me on that radio?

34:43🔗 Adam All right, Jackie.

34:44🔗 Trapt We're going to give you a trial name.

34:45🔗 Adam Yeah.

34:46🔗 Thank you. Anything but Jackie.

34:48🔗 Adam Leave in a gestural?

34:50🔗 Yeah, that's fine.

34:51🔗 Adam Okay. Leavey. Go ahead.

34:55🔗 Pretty much, I've been with my boyfriend for five years, and I'm 19, and we don't use any protection. I'm not on the pill, and I haven't been pregnant yet. Am I like unfertile?

35:06🔗 Drew Nope. It's just you're lucky. You're lucky, yeah.

35:09🔗 Adam Let me in. So society, let me give everyone a tip who's calling into the show that doesn't want the real name used on the show. There's one way to ensure that, and that's not to give the phone screener your real name.

35:21🔗 Drew That's right.

35:21🔗 Okay. I'm sorry about that.

35:23🔗 Adam That's all right. It's just the surest way I know.

35:25🔗 Drew Because otherwise, we announce the name first thing.

35:28🔗 Caller Right.

35:29🔗 Drew All right. Here we go. So here's the deal.

35:32🔗 Adam Hold on. Junior college?

35:34🔗 No. I actually go to a really big university.

35:37🔗 Adam Really?

35:38🔗 Yeah. I'm like pre-med and on a softball scholarship.

35:43🔗 Adam Softball scholarship. Pre-med. Wow.

35:46🔗 Trapt Jackie, don't get pregnant.

35:48🔗 Drew Obviously, there's some risk of fertility issues here, but the overwhelming probability is you've just dodged bullets.

35:53🔗 Caller Yeah.

35:55🔗 Adam Yeah.

35:55🔗 Drew Yeah. You have may have some, or the two of you may have some fertility issue between you, but at 19, for the most part, you're lucky.

36:01🔗 Adam Well, here's what it is. It's like saying, I've been driving for five years. I've never gotten to a car accident. Does that mean I can't get into a car accident?

36:08🔗 Drew Or do I have to wear my seatbelt?

36:10🔗 Adam Right. Yes. And yes. You yes, you will or can. And yes, you should put your seatbelt on. But you've been lucky thus far. Some people turn up, you know, turn 16 backing out of the DMV, get into an accident when they get their license. All right. So here's the other thing. Jackie, you, I mean, caller. Caller who doesn't want to be called Jackie. That's what I'll call you. Because I don't want to use your name. You play softball, correct?

36:42🔗 Caller Yes.

36:43🔗 Adam Why can't you guys just wear the goddamn baseball hats? Why do you have to wear the stupid visors?

36:49🔗 Caller No, I'm seriously, you guys, dude, I love the pants, like the shorts.

36:52🔗 Drew No, no, visors. Why do you have to wear the visors? The hats. Why can't you wear a hat?

36:56🔗 Caller Because us girls that aren't diking, we have layered hair that's cute and it gets in our face. So the visors keep it out of our face.

37:03🔗 Adam I understand the visors keep it out of your face, just like a hat would.

37:08🔗 Drew In fact, you can put it up in the hat even.

37:10🔗 Caller You know what? I tried to sport the hat, but I got totally made fun of.

37:15🔗 Adam For wearing, okay, here's what I'm saying. You're playing softball, which is essentially baseball. You have an opportunity to wear baseball uniform or softball uniform like guys wear. Guys don't wear shorts. Guys don't wear a weird visor like they're dealing 21 from the 20s or doing accounting for mob boss in the 30s. They just wear a goddamn baseball hat. Here's your chance to wear a baseball hat and baseball pants. Why do you gotta wear the weird shorts thing with the knee pads and the weird visor and all? Just wear a baseball hat.

37:49🔗 Drew Baseball clothes too, yeah.

37:50🔗 Adam Just go ahead and dress up like you're playing baseball.

37:52🔗 Drew It's designed to protect you. I don't see how you get protected with the knee pads and shorts.

37:55🔗 Adam But it's baseball.

37:57🔗 Drew Yeah, I know.

37:57🔗 Adam Just put the outfit on. Yeah, yeah.

37:59🔗 Caller It's baseball.

38:00🔗 Adam I'm saying like how can you do better than a baseball cap? Isn't that the best part about playing for a team? You know, the day you get the cap with your emblem on, you guys get some crappy plastic visor. What are you doing? Put the baseball hat on. Who thought of that visor thing?

38:16🔗 Drew And the weird shorts.

38:18🔗 Adam And the weird shorts. Yeah, you'll be sliding. And plus, if you've seen the getaway sticks on a lot of those broads, it is for, yeah, they need to be covered and they need to go long. They need to go long like a big poppy over on the red side. They need long pants, long and baggy. And let me say this, they've been watching a little bit of baseball. I see there's a guy in the socks that does this. There's a guy on the Angels, I don't know, it's Cabrera. I don't know who does this. They're the guys who have the huge wads of pine tar stuck to the front of the helmet. You know where it's all, you can't read the emblem. You can't see the Red Sox emblem anymore on some of the guy's helmets because it's black with pine tar. And it's the same with the Angels. There's a couple of guys, there's a guy who got it started on the Red Sox. He went to the Angels. He's got huge smudges and smears of pine tar to the point where you can't see the A or you can't see the B anymore. Have you seen this?

39:13🔗 Drew No, I've not seen it, but I can imagine.

39:15🔗 Adam How do you miss every facet, every part of life? I watch almost no baseball. Never seen it.

39:23🔗 Drew Never seen it. I may have seen it, just not registered, didn't know what it was.

39:26🔗 Adam Who's behind me, Rick? Rick, find a picture of the Sox guy. All right, Drew.

39:33🔗 Drew I want to see it.

39:34🔗 Adam Yes, you must see this. All right, now, and then remind me to get back to this. Drew, you've seen it.

39:39🔗 Drew Let me see it on the thing.

39:40🔗 Adam You've seen it a million times. All right, and then remind me. Tia?

39:45🔗 Caller Hi.

39:46🔗 Adam Germany or Florida?

39:48🔗 Caller Yes, I was going to say, hi, Adam Drew. Hi, Chris and Monty. I go to Germany or Florida.

39:54🔗 Adam She tells us the question and we guess, is it Germany or Florida? Go ahead.

39:58🔗 Caller All right. A man has been lying to unsuspecting locals in order to use their telephone to call sex hotlines. The man in his early 40s is in the habit of pretending that his car is broken down in order to gain access to other people's phones and call the expensive numbers. At least four women are thought to have been duped and one of them told police it was raining and I felt bad that his car is broken down and so I let him in to call the breakdown services. But after 15 minutes he still hadn't come off the phone and when I went to look he was red in the face and was obviously excited about something. When I pressed redial, someone called Jasmine answered and asked what she could do for me and on my next phone bill I found he's run up almost $75 on the call. Germany or Florida.

40:38🔗 Drew What makes you say Germany?

40:40🔗 Trapt Just because it doesn't rain that much in Florida.

40:44🔗 Drew Parts of Florida.

40:44🔗 Caller Summertime, yeah.

40:45🔗 Adam But it rains everywhere.

40:47🔗 Drew It rains in Germany.

40:48🔗 Adam Florida.

40:49🔗 Drew The language is a little bit...

40:50🔗 Caller That sounds like some pain in the Atlantic.

40:52🔗 Drew A little bit German.

40:54🔗 Adam But the chick's name was Jasmine.

40:57🔗 Drew But maybe it was an English-speaking...

40:59🔗 Adam Could have been calling.

41:00🔗 Caller But it was $75. Not 75 euros.

41:06🔗 Adam Interesting.

41:07🔗 Drew She could be screwing that with us in fact.

41:09🔗 Adam Yeah.

41:09🔗 Drew It's our caller's world.

41:10🔗 Adam Interesting. What do you think? What do you got?

41:12🔗 Drew I keep thinking Germany for some reason.

41:14🔗 Trapt I would say, I mean, if she's smart, it's Germany.

41:16🔗 Adam Yeah.

41:16🔗 Trapt And the part where they let you in your house, they used to call the services or whatever it is.

41:22🔗 Adam I'm going German.

41:23🔗 Caller Florida.

41:24🔗 Adam All right. Monty, who did you, Monty, you go Florida?

41:26🔗 Caller I'm going Florida.

41:27🔗 Adam Yeah.

41:27🔗 Caller Specifically Panhandle.

41:29🔗 Trapt Germany.

41:30🔗 Adam Two Germanys, three Germanys out of Florida. Tia?

41:34🔗 Caller It's Germany.

41:35🔗 Caller Oh yeah.

41:38🔗 Caller Oh yeah! Sweet!

41:40🔗 Adam The victory taste is sweet!

41:42🔗 Caller So good. You said you had no instinct, Drew.

41:44🔗 Adam What happened there?

41:45🔗 Drew I was following him.

41:46🔗 Adam All right. Trapped in studio tonight. We'll take a quick break and we'll be right back after this.

41:57🔗 Drew We'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

42:19🔗 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191 are trapped in studio tonight. Chris Monti from the band. Someone in control. Name of the CD. Jenny McCarthy coming in here on Tuesday. Saw Siskel and Ebert or Roper. Roper and Ebert. Yeah, it would have been nice. Well, you guys can stay here for 48 hours.

42:45🔗 Caller Can we show up at the gate on that day?

42:47🔗 Adam I'll tell you what, come back in 72 and you can smell her chair. So we'll do it. Gave her movie the worst review of any move I've ever seen in my life.

42:55🔗 Caller Wow.

42:56🔗 Adam Yeah. They were like, once in a while they do the two thumbs down and sometimes they're like, not only is it two thumbs down, it's way down, it's like incompetent and what was she thinking? It was brutal.

43:08🔗 Drew What was the film?

43:09🔗 Adam It's a new movie called The Dirty Love, which I guess is coming out and she's gonna be plugging it.

43:15🔗 Caller So don't ask her about the review.

43:16🔗 Adam You might have to ask her if she saw that. Yeah, it was brutal. Brutal. All right. You ready to keep on keep it on?

43:24🔗 Drew Here we go.

43:26🔗 Adam Cervix freezed. Let's talk to Amanda. Amanda?

43:32🔗 Caller Hello?

43:32🔗 Adam Amanda, what's up?

43:34🔗 Caller Hi, how are you?

43:36🔗 Adam Is that start as Amanda and just go to Amanda?

43:40🔗 Caller No, it's Nanda.

43:42🔗 Adam All right. Never was Amanda?

43:45🔗 Caller No. All right.

43:46🔗 Caller Okay.

43:46🔗 Adam All right.

43:47🔗 Caller All right.

43:47🔗 Caller I have a question here. Okay.

43:50🔗 Caller Are you familiar with?

43:51🔗 Adam I don't like a chick with the name Man, right? In the beginning, I feel weird having sex with Man. Any Sir Calder Man for short. Now people like, who'd you have sex with, Man?

44:01🔗 Trapt Must have been some parents that named him before they were born.

44:04🔗 Adam There you go. Probably thought it was going to be a dude. Yeah. Yeah. Smart. That's why we got to wait. Go ahead, Man.

44:13🔗 Caller Okay. I had this surgical procedure thingy called cryosurgery. Yeah. Do you know what it is?

44:20🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

44:21🔗 Caller Like, and I was wondering, like they told me that I couldn't put anything on it, like inside it. Then like the discharge that's coming out, like it smells. And I want to use like feminine wipes and I don't know if I would like do anything bad.

44:34🔗 Drew That's fine. Well, how long ago is the procedure?

44:36🔗 Caller It was done on Friday.

44:39🔗 Adam What's a feminine wipe? To me, anything you wipe your vagina with becomes a feminine wipe.

44:43🔗 Caller That's right.

44:45🔗 Adam Cat tail, anything. It all becomes a feminine wipe.

44:48🔗 Drew What's that, Amanda? What are you saying?

44:49🔗 Caller It's like mass in jail or something.

44:51🔗 Drew Yeah, but you don't put it inside. You just use a wipe on the outside, right?

44:54🔗 Caller You just use it on the outside.

44:55🔗 Drew That's fine.

44:55🔗 Adam You're talking about mass in jail, right?

44:57🔗 Caller Well, I think, I guess.

44:58🔗 Caller I don't know.

44:59🔗 Drew Okay.

45:01🔗 Adam Sweetie, if you're going to be a girl, you're going to have to learn how to pronounce douche, not the word douche, but the leading manufacturer. You know, Massingale sells, you know, millions and millions of gallons of douche every year. They're the leading manufacturer of douche. You understand?

45:16🔗 Drew Oh, sure.

45:17🔗 Adam They're the Budweiser of douche. They're not. Well, they're not. You know, they're not a small boutique.

45:24🔗 Drew King of douche.

45:24🔗 Adam They're the king of douche. You've seen the Massingale douche keg truck, have you not?

45:30🔗 Drew Yes, yes.

45:30🔗 Adam Clydesdale's proudly pulling in Ed McMahon behind the reins.

45:34🔗 Drew Pictures of summer breezes blowing behind.

45:36🔗 Adam Ba-da-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. And the winter commercial bells ringing.

45:42🔗 Caller Clydesdale and has a douche.

45:45🔗 Adam Anheiser's douche responsibly. Yeah.

45:52🔗 Drew All right.

45:52🔗 Adam Where were we, Olivia?

45:54🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

45:54🔗 Drew Oh, Mandy.

45:55🔗 Caller Oh, yeah. Yeah.

45:56🔗 Adam Is she cool?

45:57🔗 Drew Yeah, you're fine. I worry about that smell. Do talk to your doctor about it. But because it usually it's almost nothing after that.

46:01🔗 Adam So speaking of feminine wipes, I was at the Tory Amos concert last night with my gayer than gay assistant, Matt. And it was just gay on gay on gay.

46:12🔗 Trapt Oh, these are those gold dust moments.

46:15🔗 Drew I didn't realize that. I didn't know.

46:17🔗 Adam We think hardcore rappers. Who do you think said a crap? Super gay, super duper gay. Like these guys should have had capes. Well, actually, they did have capes. But I mean, they were like gay super heroes.

46:30🔗 Drew Sure.

46:30🔗 Adam I was the only straight guy in the entire the entire Greek theater. And just the fact that was at the Greek theater, I just I thought I thought a crazy sodomy orgy was going to break out at any second. I thought it was just speaking of trapped. I thought it was just a trap. You know, you gave your gay buddy says we're going to see Tori Amos at the Greek theater next year. I know you got a ball gag in your mouth and there's a line around the block to get to your glory hole. You know what I'm saying?

46:57🔗 Drew I think I do.

46:57🔗 Adam Okay.

47:02🔗 Drew We have a good times.

47:03🔗 Caller Yeah.

47:03🔗 Drew Let's take a break.

47:04🔗 Caller Yeah.

47:04🔗 Adam It wouldn't have been a gold dust moment. It would have been a fudge pack moment. Yeah. That's what it would have been. Let's take a break. Trapped in the studio tonight. We're going to find that batting helmet with our own.

47:17🔗 Drew We're still looking for it.

47:18🔗 Adam We will find it, my friend. And then you will you will hear some of my vengeance.

47:23🔗 Drew We got it.

47:23🔗 All right.

47:24🔗 Adam We'll be back after this.

47:28🔗 Caller Alright, guys, here's the deal.

47:30🔗 You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

47:33🔗 Caller One call is all you need to make.

47:35🔗 Call the Dateline.

47:36🔗 Caller 877-889-DATE.

47:38🔗 Caller Call the Dateline.

47:41🔗 Caller Loveline will be right back. Loveline will be right back.

48:00🔗 Adam Yeah, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Nance, Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191, Chris and Monty here tonight from Trap.

48:13🔗 Drew Anyway, what's your sign?

48:16🔗 Adam Oh, we were just talking about uniforms and baseball. I don't like it. I don't like that some guys have the pants that actually hang down so low. It goes under their heel. And then other guys wear the pants that come up around their knees. And then some guys wear the stirrups where you can see the stirrup. And then other guys have all sock that's just one color. Here's the deal. Someone should look up the definition of uniform, but that's the deal. You're supposed to all look like it's like your uniform.

48:47🔗 Drew Your uniform.

48:48🔗 Adam Right. Here's what I don't want. I don't want LAPD going, look, man, I don't wear, you know, I wear sweat pants. And then I wear the top. And then I like to roll my sleeves up. And I wear my hat backwards.

49:01🔗 Drew Right. I like to shred my hat and then put it on.

49:03🔗 Adam Yeah, like to rub crap all over my hat.

49:05🔗 Trapt It all starts with baseball.

49:06🔗 Adam It all starts with baseball. And, you know, I don't need the man telling the guy whether he can have the pork chop sideburns or the mustache or not. But I would insist that everyone on my team, here's the deal, we're going to take a vote on how to wear the pants and that's how we wear them. But everyone wears them that way.

49:22🔗 Drew Uniform.

49:23🔗 Adam Right. And if you like big chunks of pine tar, which really just looks like bear crap, smear it all over the front of your batting helmet to the point where the team logo is obscured, I'm going to, and you can do that by the way, five grand a game will be what you're fined.

49:39🔗 Drew Right. How do you think, I mean, the military presented all this, huh?

49:42🔗 Adam I don't understand why baseball though doesn't get involved. I know everyone wants to know what we're talking about because I was complaining about batting helmets and softball and white girls.

49:49🔗 Drew Trapped here tonight.

49:50🔗 Adam White girls. I said that, I said that.

49:52🔗 Drew Brittany was our winner going to Europe tonight.

49:54🔗 Adam I said that.

49:55🔗 Drew Okay.

49:56🔗 Adam Here's my point. In the NFL, you can't do your own thing. You got to have your hip pads tucked in. You can't have them hanging out. You couldn't take the Pittsburgh Steelers logo and put crap on it and go out on the field, you would be fine. You can't just do your own thing.

50:12🔗 Drew Right.

50:14🔗 Adam Why not in baseball?

50:15🔗 Drew Right. The original deal of teams were military teams. Right. And then so athletic sport teams are just sort of renditions of that. It's not about individuals doing their own thing. That's boxing.

50:26🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah. That's why in boxing, that's why you get the tassels going.

50:31🔗 Drew Right.

50:31🔗 Adam The white guy can't pull that off.

50:33🔗 Drew No. That's a different issue.

50:34🔗 Adam You get the fringe going on the trunks. You get, I like once in a while guy fights in not really trunk, almost a loin cloth.

50:44🔗 Drew But you get whatever we want that works.

50:46🔗 Adam That's right. That's right. Leopard skin, loin cloth, Dylan? You're 18? No. What year were you born?

50:59🔗 Drew Nice try, Dylan.

51:02🔗 Adam What year? Should we give you another 10 minutes?

51:04🔗 Trapt Say something.

51:06🔗 Drew He's gone. Dylan is 12 or so.

51:11🔗 Adam That was strong. Here's the whole thing about the bogus call. Bring it on. Don't taco two syllables into my first question. You know what I'm saying?

51:22🔗 Drew Yes, of course. Why bother?

51:23🔗 Adam Just bring it. Yeah.

51:24🔗 Drew We know we're going to go at you.

51:26🔗 Trapt We need a valiant opponent.

51:27🔗 Drew And thank you.

51:28🔗 Adam Yeah. Try to sound like at least one nad has dropped. If you're going to say 18.

51:36🔗 Caller Hmm.

51:37🔗 Adam Like that guy actually sounded like he had a wind up beanie on and was actually he was calling from a cell phone, which was on his big wheel.

51:46🔗 Drew Yeah.

51:46🔗 Adam The key sounded that young. He sounded younger than 12 if he was if he was even that.

51:52🔗 Drew Yeah.

51:53🔗 Adam And the other thing too is a false set of people. People don't do the math. They don't do that thing where it's like they go, I'm 18. I'm 18. And then you go, yeah, what year were you born? And they're like, huh, huh, huh.

52:07🔗 Drew So for the for the three.

52:09🔗 Adam Right. Now, here's how here's how you lie, everybody. Nobody will ever get past the third question in life. All they want to know, they have they have a couple. They have like what you're go 18. You don't sound 18.

52:21🔗 Drew Right.

52:22🔗 Adam Wait, wait, you're what year were you born?

52:24🔗 Drew Question. Well, that's good. I like that. Two or three, three, three is a good rule. You don't go past three.

52:30🔗 Adam Nobody gets to the fourth question. People ask you, you know, what year or how do you know this guy or what do you know about this? You could be an expert on anything. You could claim to know everything. You could go anywhere. Everyone would leave you alone. All you need is the first two or three questions.

52:45🔗 Drew Cop pulls you over, prepare for the first three.

52:48🔗 Adam Yeah. Where are you heading at this time at night? You know what I mean? How many beers you had? Oh, look, you could be the graduate of any college you pick, as long as you know what town the college is in and you pick a major. You could be talking to someone who also graduated from that college. All you need is two or three and you're done.

53:08🔗 Drew Right. You're right.

53:09🔗 Adam But nobody does that. Lazy line.

53:12🔗 Trapt They don't even get past the first question.

53:14🔗 Adam Yeah, they just don't. If you're going to, again, you're going to try to pass your it. Just do a quick piece of math on your age and or pick an age. It's easy to do mathematically. Just you know, you pick, you pick 20 when we're born 85. You know what I'm saying?

53:30🔗 Drew Yeah.

53:30🔗 Adam All right. You don't have to change your birth date. Olivia?

53:34🔗 Caller Yeah.

53:35🔗 Adam 25?

53:36🔗 Caller Yeah.

53:37🔗 Adam What year were you born?

53:39🔗 Caller I don't know.

53:40🔗 Drew There you go.

53:41🔗 Trapt That was quick.

53:43🔗 Adam What's up?

53:44🔗 Caller I get the world's worst hangovers even when I don't drink very much. And so I'm just wondering why that happens to me and what I can do if I'm just not drinking alcohol.

53:55🔗 Drew Couple of questions. What are the characteristics of the hangover?

54:00🔗 Caller Generally, around five or six in the morning, I start tossing and turning and then by around seven and violently throwing up all day until around six or seven at night.

54:09🔗 Adam Lightweight.

54:10🔗 Drew Are you Asian? Are you Asian?

54:11🔗 Adam That is. You got to push through.

54:13🔗 Caller I'm not Asian. I'm white.

54:15🔗 Drew Where are your ancestors from? Hello?

54:20🔗 Caller Hello?

54:21🔗 Drew Where are your ancestors from?

54:23🔗 Caller There's Ireland.

54:25🔗 Drew Ireland.

54:26🔗 Adam You should be able to- Yes.

54:27🔗 Caller That's some good stock for drinking.

54:29🔗 Drew That means you may be drinking more than you think. Really? Yeah.

54:33🔗 Adam How much do you drink?

54:35🔗 Caller It depends on the night. This has happened to me before when I've had just two or three beers, but other nights I'll drink a lot. At that time, I think I kind of deserve my hangovers, but I think we get them regardless.

54:48🔗 Drew Well, I'll tell you when you can get it after just a little bit is if you drink every night and one of the nights isn't very much, you can still get sick the next day.

54:55🔗 Adam You can?

54:56🔗 Drew You can have withdrawal, and or you can have a gastritis or a pancreatitis. You can have lots of things.

55:00🔗 Adam Why if you drink every night? I mean, if you drink a little bit every night, you can still get it.

55:04🔗 Drew Well, she's not drinking a little bit every night is the point. She's drinking every night and sometimes more and sometimes less. But if she's drinking like that, even on the nights when she doesn't drink much, she can get sick.

55:12🔗 Trapt What about when you drink like three nights in a row and the first night you drink a lot and the next day you have a bad hangover, but you just pull through and you keep it going. And the next day you feel you wake up and you're fine. What? No, usually the third day.

55:24🔗 Drew You if you keep drinking, then the day when you stop, you'll have withdrawal.

55:27🔗 Trapt OK, well, that's when the withdrawal kicks.

55:29🔗 Caller I would say start mixing with PD lights.

55:31🔗 Trapt Let's see how that treats you. Take some milk, thistle and some water before you go to sleep.

55:35🔗 Adam Believe me, the band knows, the professionals, not only musicians, but alcoholics.

55:39🔗 Caller If you can't find PD light, get Gatorade. There you go.

55:41🔗 Adam Yeah, Drew always says electrolytes, yeah.

55:44🔗 Caller Keep that water going.

55:45🔗 Drew But she's having a day of vomiting usually means gastritis or pancreatitis. That's a pretty serious thing.

55:50🔗 Adam Like I said, I hear lightweight. Olivia, we'll stop drinking or back off.

55:56🔗 Caller Yeah, I thought that that was what I could do, but then the other night I had three beers and I drank water all night long and I didn't go to bed right away and so I felt like I took all of the precautions I could and I still felt sick.

56:10🔗 Drew No, no, no. The precaution is don't drink. That's the only precaution you can take. All right, well luck.

56:15🔗 Adam Or drop or you know, or you know, push through. Drew, what is, what's the best, what's the best hangover?

56:22🔗 Drew What's the best hangover? What's the best remedy?

56:26🔗 Adam Best thing to do? Best thing, best thing to do before that night.

56:30🔗 Drew Then other, there are medications you can take.

56:32🔗 Adam Oh really?

56:32🔗 Drew Yeah. Benzodiazepines. Wow.

56:34🔗 Adam What have you been waiting on?

56:36🔗 Drew And then medicines to prevent the gastritis, the, you know, pepsids and that sort of stuff.

56:39🔗 Adam Okay. So the night, let's just say good night of drinking. Before you go to bed, what would you do?

56:46🔗 Drew But what I do?

56:47🔗 Adam What would one do?

56:48🔗 Caller You'd do nothing cause you had a good night of drinking.

56:50🔗 Drew There's nothing you can really do.

56:51🔗 Adam Well, how about eating a banana?

56:53🔗 Drew That would be good.

56:54🔗 Trapt I'd take milk thistle on it.

56:56🔗 Adam Milk thistle.

56:56🔗 Trapt It just, I don't know what it does.

56:58🔗 Adam What's milk thistle?

56:59🔗 Trapt It's just, I don't know, it's just like cleans your liver out kind of.

57:01🔗 Adam Where do you get that milk thistle?

57:02🔗 Drew Your liver's not really involved with this process we're talking about at all.

57:05🔗 Adam This is that a vitamin?

57:07🔗 Drew This is a brain thing we're talking about.

57:08🔗 Adam How about a multi-vitamin? How about a piece of bread?

57:13🔗 Drew How about everyone talking to the mic except for Adam so much? Some food would be good. A lot of fluid is good because by fluid I don't mean water. I mean the fluid with something in it. So like Gatorade, that kind of thing.

57:27🔗 Adam Why? Why not just water?

57:28🔗 Drew Because water, if you start vomiting, you're going to be losing sodium and water and you replace it with water and you end up with a low sodium in your body.

57:35🔗 Adam But water's good just if you're not going to vomit, right?

57:39🔗 Drew Again, I still think if you're going to stay hydrated, there's a difference between fluid and water as your body handles it. If you're going to stay hydrated, you need fluids.

57:46🔗 Adam Well, here's the thing. Gatorade ought to come out with a flavor that tastes like chili fries. Because then we can combine the two things that you really want to do the most. You know, like you want some grease, you want a burger, you want to go to Tommy's, you want to get a chili dog, you want to get a chili burger. It's four in the morning. It's not going to make it. Gatorade comes out, but you want to get the electrolytes in you.

58:07🔗 Drew Because when the alcohol makes you dump sodium, potassium and water, and if you replace it with just water, you end up depleting, you know, it's diluting everything in your body.

58:16🔗 Adam That's why my Gatorade chili fries flavor comes out.

58:19🔗 Drew That's full of salt. There you go.

58:21🔗 Adam You bust it out. Bust it. It's a cheese floating on the top.

58:25🔗 Drew And then when you vomit, you really feel like, you know, it's a full fact.

58:28🔗 Adam You feel like you went out and made a run. Well, here's the problem. Quite honestly, people get loaded. People think it's a good idea to go make a Tommy's Burger Run or In-N-Out Burger Run or Fat Burger Run. Half the 502s people get half the DUI's people get are on the way to make those stupid runs.

58:46🔗 Drew Look at Andrew Rick. It's like, yeah, yeah.

58:48🔗 Adam What happened? I got, I got a guy who works for me, got 400 hours of community service.

58:55🔗 Drew Yeah.

58:55🔗 Adam My buddy, Gary, 400 hours. That community really break that down.

58:58🔗 Drew Gary the Carpenter?

58:59🔗 Adam Gary the Carpenter. 400 hours community service blew a 2.7 because he decided to go grab some Taco Bell when he was blasted at 1130 at night. Now the drive-through had just closed with cops.

59:13🔗 Caller I have a buddy who had a DUI trying to make a run for the border too. That Taco Bell.

59:19🔗 Adam You should literally keep going for the border. Yeah. Here's the thing. I don't know what percentage of DUI's are received on that run, but I'll guarantee you at least half is going out to grab something greasy. If we had my Gatorade Chili Fry, Thirst Quenching Flavor, all right? Now obviously, you wouldn't use it at the basketball game. You know, no one wants to chug chili fries after playing hoops all day in the hot sun. And here's the thing. You would never use it because it'd just be sitting around grossing you out until you got loaded. And then you realize, I either drive down the hill to Tommy's, get the DUI, spend the night throwing up in the drunk tank, or I drink my chili fries flavored Gatorade.

1:00:05🔗 Drew Huh? What would the cool name be? And they have all those fancy names in the frosty.

1:00:09🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:00:10🔗 Drew Chunky Chili or what the heck would it be?

1:00:12🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah.

1:00:12🔗 Drew Chili chunks.

1:00:13🔗 Adam I like Chili Blast. Nice. Sounds like it's a blast to chili. You know, we work extreme chili blast. And you just drink, you know, you drink your chili fries. And you do, you could do a greasy cheeseburger flavor or pepperoni pizza or whatever it is, sends you down and sends you out to go get that deal. And believe me, the cops know when you're pulling into Tommy's out on Van Nuys, out on Saticoy and Sepulveda, 245 in the morning, they know you're blitzed. You are either drunk or you are stoned or you're drunk and stoned or possibly worse. And if you're a cop, it's easy pickings because you're enjoying yourself a burger, too. You're just hanging out. What do you want to do? You want to go down to the crack down out in South Central? Or how about we go grab a double king cheese over at Fat Burger? Yeah, go out there, we'll hang out. And everybody who's in this drive thru line is loaded. There's one guy who's going fishing with his son and they're getting an early start. Everyone else could be arrested.

1:01:20🔗 Drew We'll see how the guy that takes the orders, the lines get so long, they have a guy out there on the line. Just have a cop walk with them with a ticket.

1:01:27🔗 Adam A little breathalyzer and just walk that line. All fast food places after midnight. That's it. LAPD ought to just open a place called Chili Fries. We're open till four, amigos. You know what I mean? Big sign up there. Saturday night, open till 4 a.m. Chili Fries and malts to go. Drive-through and then you just set up. There's really nothing inside. It's almost like a styrofoam cash register. There's nobody actually working there. And then people start piling up and you just walk by at the breathalyzer and just start pulling people out of the car.

1:02:00🔗 Drew Like a cartoon. Yeah, the cars go off empty.

1:02:03🔗 Adam Right. But if the Gatorade people would get off their asses and start focusing on my chili fries flavored Gatorade, we would save this country.

1:02:12🔗 Drew Okay.

1:02:13🔗 Adam All right. But you know what I know.

1:02:14🔗 Drew I know what you're saying. I got it.

1:02:15🔗 Adam Sauce. Strong.

1:02:16🔗 Drew Steve, 25.

1:02:17🔗 Adam Powerful stuff, Steve. Powerful. Steve.

1:02:21🔗 Hey, how you doing?

1:02:22🔗 Adam 25. What's up?

1:02:23🔗 Well, not me apparently. I'm having trouble getting and maintaining an erection.

1:02:29🔗 Drew Hold on.

1:02:30🔗 Adam Who wants chili fries right now?

1:02:31🔗 Drew I'm dying.

1:02:32🔗 Adam I'm dying for chili fries.

1:02:33🔗 Drew Chili burger is what sounds right to me.

1:02:35🔗 Adam Well, I'm doing both.

1:02:36🔗 Caller Yeah, Tommy's is causing me some confusion here.

1:02:39🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, you know, you would get the burger. And then when you ate the burger and the chili dripped off and I would I would wipe it up with my fry.

1:02:46🔗 Drew Stop it.

1:02:47🔗 Adam You know what I mean?

1:02:48🔗 Drew I think Steve is bogus.

1:02:49🔗 Adam You do?

1:02:50🔗 Drew So let's talk about it anyway.

1:02:52🔗 Adam Yeah. It should be nice to have some chili. Steve.

1:02:56🔗 Hey, what's up?

1:02:57🔗 Drew So what's going on?

1:02:57🔗 I swear, not bogus. I do like the chili cheese Gatorade idea. Sounds good. Straight male. I have a girlfriend. Love her to death. Really into her. For the past two months, it's been like every now and again, if we did it earlier in the day, I wouldn't be able to go again, secondly, in the day, the second time. And it's just getting worse and worse. Like it's gotten to the point now where it's like, I can't even do it by myself. I can like.

1:03:53🔗 Drew BKG is to show you nothing about blood. What are you talking about?

1:03:57🔗 Oh, well, the one doctor I went to, she said, your EKG says your heart's...

1:04:01🔗 Adam Gee, hold on, they're so chick doctors. This guy's all over the map, bro.

1:04:06🔗 Drew Shows you what? The EKG is about the electrical activity of the heart. You sort of can refer, you can draw inferences about the condition of the muscle as a result. So what's wrong with the heart muscle?

1:04:18🔗 I was just having some chest pain, and I was having it checked out, because...

1:04:23🔗 Drew And so the... I think BKG was fine. Cause if it weren't fine, they would have put you in the hospital.

1:04:27🔗 Okay, okay. Cause that was a little of a language barrier with her. She was an Armenian descent and it was kinda...

1:04:33🔗 Drew And did they try to put you on a... Hang on a second Steve, slow down here buddy.

1:04:37🔗 Adam What's up with this guy?

1:04:38🔗 Drew Anxiety disorder for one thing, that's why he's not getting erections.

1:04:41🔗 Adam Oh really?

1:04:41🔗 Caller Oh, jeesh.

1:04:44🔗 Adam He's anxious. I mean I want some chili fries.

1:04:49🔗 Drew I know me too. Let me finish with Steve here, that right there. Steve, did they put you on a treadmill?

1:04:55🔗 Caller Um, no they didn't.

1:04:56🔗 Drew Alright, so there's nothing wrong with your heart. They also did a chest x-ray and they saw a little area of maybe infection.

1:05:01🔗 Caller In the lung, yeah.

1:05:03🔗 Drew So of course, for sure, if you had normal erection function and then all of a sudden it goes away, a medical workup is appropriate. They should have done blood work on you or whatnot. Medication is a common reason for that. However, in your case, you're trying to perform like at a sort of marathon level of sex, where you're having sex twice a day, every day, and you're wondering why you're progressively running out of steam because you're having sex every day.

1:05:25🔗 Adam Yeah, but at 25, you should be able to pull that off.

1:05:28🔗 Drew Not anxious guys like Steve, and not eternally. He probably pulled it off for a while and then just sort of ran out of steam. When he got into his sort of rhythm, this isn't his rhythm.

1:05:35🔗 Adam Speaking of pulling it off, he can't even do that successfully anymore.

1:05:39🔗 Drew But after he's had sex in the morning, he can't ejaculate in the afternoon, surprise. That's the way it goes.

1:05:46🔗 Caller Yeah, it's been like two weeks now where we haven't had any at all. And it's like if we get into it and we try a little bit and it's like, you know, it just it gets like almost there and it just shuts off.

1:05:56🔗 Drew Are you nervous about it happening?

1:05:59🔗 Caller Probably a little. I'm like, you know, kind of self-conscious about it, but she's real, you know, you know, calm. She's like, hey, don't worry about it. It's okay. Whatever.

1:06:07🔗 Drew Well, then finish the medical workup. That's the appropriate thing to do. Or it could be an anxiety-related thing. And somebody your age, again, that's a common reason that they have problems. You've stopped having sex for two weeks and you're still having a difficulty. I'd still look good on the medical path. Mmm. Chili fries.

1:06:25🔗 Adam No, I was just, I was really thinking of how many less accidents and DUIs we would have if all restaurants just closed at 10 at night.

1:06:34🔗 Drew That's right.

1:06:35🔗 Trapt Oh, that's true.

1:06:36🔗 Adam You'd never go, you know, you do, you never go on a drunken run.

1:06:39🔗 Caller You'd probably curse the day that ever happened.

1:06:41🔗 Adam Oh, I would. And then you want to talk about like morbid obesity and stuff, the damage, what you can do between midnight and 2 a.m. when you're drunk and you decide to go on a run.

1:06:51🔗 Drew That's just alcohol, but the pot, come on too.

1:06:55🔗 Adam No, one could make an argument like they have the 10-day waiting list for buying firearms and stuff like that with the obesity levels we have in this city, in this country and the DUIs and stuff like that. One could make an argument for having these places closed 10 o'clock. This is like they don't serve booze. I mean, liquor store closed, no servant booze from 2 a.m. to 6 a.m. I think people sort of agree on that. People might make this same argument with fast food. I would chain myself to a Wendy's if that happened and not not let it happen. But I'm just saying logically.

1:07:31🔗 Drew It's just conscientious objection.

1:07:33🔗 Adam You could make an argument. All right. Let's hear a song from Trap.

1:07:37🔗 Drew Good idea.

1:07:37🔗 Adam What do we got off of someone in control is the name of the CD. Got a little song called Waiting. Yeah, Trap. Good song from Trap. In studio tonight, we'll nail Ms. Adams who speaks, someone in control, I should say, which came out last Tuesday. We'll take a quick break, and we'll be right back after this.

1:11:49🔗 Caller Hello, this is your radio. Loveline will be right back.

1:11:55🔗 Adam Heat things up with new Durex warming condoms. There's sex, and then there's Durex. Yeah, everybody. Loveline, I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LLVE-191. Trapped in studio tonight. Chris and Monty here. You know, Drew, we monkey around sometimes. We're talking about this sort of rich man, poor man thing. Like how real rich people and real poor people share some of the same similarities. In their lifestyles.

1:12:47🔗 Drew The cars at the front yard, multiple cars, the padded furniture in the front outside.

1:12:52🔗 Adam Well, like let's say like really rich people have a sofa outside. Maybe it's around a pool in a cabana and really poor people have a sofa outside. To the same with showering outside. You know, the list keeps going and going. Lots of cars being towed for good and for bad reasons.

1:13:10🔗 Drew Yes, yes.

1:13:11🔗 Adam I experienced something that made me really realize what a winner I was the other day when I had a car flat bedded to me. Oof. You know what I mean?

1:13:22🔗 Drew Like not to put the few extra miles on it to go pick it up.

1:13:25🔗 Adam Cannot be trusted. Wow. The point is, is it, you know, I've spent a lifetime not only towing cars, but towing cars with like a fire hose right to the bumper. I literally, we literally towed a car once. We put one of those football pads, you know, the ones you put on your forearm, the ones the coaches use, you know, to do the drills with. Shiver drills. Yeah, shiver drills. They use them in karate class, you know, those kick pads. Yeah. Taped one of those to the front bumper of a guy's car. And he pushed my car through Coldwater Canyon and up to the, you know, from the west side to the to the valley side, all the way, just bumping it, just pushing it. Well, it worked fine, by the way. Could have got a crazy ticket, but it worked. Worked like a charm to, but a flatbed, when a flatbed comes to your home and drops the car off. What kind of car? That's, that's when you've arrived. It was an Aston Martin. And it really almost brought a tear to my eye that something was being dropped off instead of a toad after having three. I'm the only guy I know who said three motorcycles toad, motorcycles toad, three of them toad.

1:14:33🔗 Drew It's quite a track record you've got. Yeah, it's good.

1:14:36🔗 Adam Yeah. Oh, four, four motorcycles toad. Yeah, one was my bike that I lent to somebody who had it, who then got toad. But who else has had four motorcycles toad?

1:14:51🔗 Caller Was it due to negligence or because they broke down?

1:14:53🔗 Adam Super white trash.

1:14:56🔗 Drew Super negligence.

1:14:57🔗 Adam No, no, none of them broke down. None of them broke down. They were all, one was towed. Just get off the bike and had a towed because I didn't have a class four, class three, or whatever license I needed to be on the bike. One was towed because it was parked too close to something when I was working in Century City as a painter. The license plate off it, and they toad it, and the third got toad at UCLA when my buddy, Um Gad Abu Zam Zam, borrowed it to drive in, and the license plate got broken.

1:15:28🔗 Drew Finally met Um Gad. It's a very exciting moment for me.

1:15:30🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah, he still owes me for that bike.

1:15:33🔗 Drew Um Gad Abu Zam Zam.

1:15:34🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

1:15:35🔗 Drew What kind of name is that? It's like a novelty name out of a cartoon or something.

1:15:39🔗 Adam You want to know what's funny? When you get your bike.

1:15:42🔗 Drew Sinbad cartoon.

1:15:42🔗 Adam When you get your bike towed for not having a class whatever license, you can't pick it up from the tow yard until you go to the DMV to get a temporary class whatever license. It's got for you can't take the test because you don't have a motorcycle because it's at the impound yard. So you take a written test, get a temp and then go to the tow yard and go get your bike. So you're just the same place as you were before. You just took a written test. You don't they don't know if you can actually operate the motorcycle. Oh, it's good. Oh, when you're poor, baby, when you're poor, life just sticks it and then starts twisting the knife. Got to get it. No one. Now you have no transportation. You have to get a ride to the DMV, then a ride back to the tow yard, then pay for it, get the bike, then drive the bike back to the DMV and go around the pylons. Oh, when you're poor, you just wait one big goddamn long line. That's it. Just go get in line, baby.

1:16:40🔗 Drew Jill, 17.

1:16:42🔗 Caller Hi.

1:16:43🔗 Adam Hey.

1:16:43🔗 Caller I'm very nervous to talk about this right now, but I just wanted to know if I need to consider what I did with my cousin when I was like 12. I need to consider that rape. We had sex. I didn't.

1:16:57🔗 Drew Yes, that's a definite yes.

1:17:00🔗 Adam Well, hold on.

1:17:02🔗 Drew No, it's a definite yes.

1:17:03🔗 Adam Well, can't you finish your question? Who did you?

1:17:06🔗 Drew That's the point. It doesn't matter what happened if she had sex at 12.

1:17:09🔗 Adam I know that. I don't know how old he was. I don't even know if it was a he.

1:17:14🔗 Caller Yeah, it was a he. I am.

1:17:17🔗 Adam Don't give me that look, Drew. She could have screwed around with that girl.

1:17:22🔗 Caller I haven't seen him. I've only seen him like once in my life and I was like three. When we drove up to Seattle to go like up there for Christmas. And then when they came down to California like five years ago, I was really attracted to him and like they stayed with us. And I'm here at my dad's house and like he just would always come in my room at night and it happened to like three or four times, like three times.

1:17:46🔗 Adam And how old, how old was he?

1:17:48🔗 Caller He was like 18, 19.

1:17:50🔗 Caller He was a lot older.

1:17:51🔗 Caller And you were 12?

1:17:53🔗 Caller He wasn't even like, I don't know, he was a bad guy. Like he was all in big.

1:17:57🔗 Adam Now was she was an old 12 and he was a very young 32.

1:18:01🔗 Drew So don't even look at his rape. It's sexual abuse, his childhood sexual abuse. You could have been 10. You could have been eight. It would have been the same thing. Yeah.

1:18:09🔗 Adam Although better 12 than eight.

1:18:11🔗 Caller Yes. I've talked to a couple of people about it ever since this happened. And that's what they told me. And they told me I need to see like a therapist.

1:18:18🔗 Adam And well, here's the, here's the question. Why is it, I mean, maybe, and yes, you should see a therapist because of that incident, but you should mostly see a therapist for what 12-year-old thinks it's a great idea to hook up with a 19-year-old who shares the same name.

1:18:35🔗 Drew Right.

1:18:37🔗 Caller Okay. But see, okay, I understand that was wrong. I'm not like messed up or anything, anything bad.

1:18:42🔗 Drew Well, Gio, whoa, whoa. Stop with the right and wrong stuff. Go look at a 12-year-old today. Go to the seventh grade.

1:18:49🔗 Adam Well, not, not today. Go back about 40 years and see one, because now they got boobs and attitude and they're all glitz, piercing and stuff like that.

1:18:58🔗 Drew Go to the seventh grade at your middle school and look at those little children and realize that's who you were.

1:19:03🔗 Caller I wasn't a little kid.

1:19:04🔗 Adam Gio.

1:19:05🔗 Caller I was like totally, yeah.

1:19:07🔗 Drew I know, Gio, but you were 12. Go look at the 12-year-olds even that are developed and realize you're holding yourself accountable to a level of sort of sophistication and cognitive abilities that 12-year-olds don't have. It wasn't like you did something, planned something, you were 12.

1:19:22🔗 Adam Well, okay. But what happened in your family if anything at all that led you down this path?

1:19:30🔗 Caller Well, my parents divorced in 97. I was like nine and things were all right. I didn't really know what was going on until I started having to go to my dad's house for the weekends and stuff like that. But I'm an okay kid. Don't get me wrong. I just wanted to know, can I or do I need to blame the fact that I became really sexually active like right after that, like literally right after that? Do I blame that? Well, what happened?

1:19:58🔗 Adam Look, here's the thing. It's a causative factor.

1:20:03🔗 Drew Jill, you're 17. You're trying to figure something out that is a clinical issue that you have no business even trying to figure out. Sit down with a therapist and deal with this. There's a lot going on here. And yes, when kids are sexually abused and or rape, women particularly will often act out sexually compulsively after that. Yes. And the guy is more going on here than you know.

1:20:24🔗 Adam The guy was 19.

1:20:26🔗 Caller Oh, yeah. He's like totally like that whole side of my family is like I hear they're totally crazy. They all have like medical problems and everything. That's why my mom never really like let us keep in touch with them.

1:20:36🔗 Caller So you're not still in touch with him?

1:20:38🔗 Caller No, no, no. Like I tried to contact him about like over the summertime this summer because I hear he had a baby with his wife or something. He was like 16 and I tried to call him and he was like, Oh, Joe, oh, hey, I'm leaving for work right now. And then I gave him my phone number here in California and he never called me back. And I told my wife, why did you try to call him?

1:20:58🔗 Drew Why did you try to call him?

1:21:01🔗 Caller Because he's my cousin and I wanted to hear about his baby. And then I...

1:21:07🔗 Adam And he's got a 16 year old pregnant?

1:21:10🔗 Caller Yeah, and he's, or that's what I heard from my mom. I don't know.

1:21:14🔗 Adam Hold on, I mean, Modesto, 12, Drew, I know I've been wrong in the past, but please, please, please, at least his side of the family. Jews, they just have to be Jews. There's no other culture that would do this. I know it sounds racist, everybody. I'm sorry, but I speak the truth. He's now the guy's like 25, he's with a 16-year-old, she's pregnant. He was banging his 12-year-old cousin. They're calling for Modesto. I just know Jews. I just do. I know I've been wrong about this every single time, but this time I know I'm right. You guys are Jewish, right, Jill?

1:21:55🔗 Caller No, no, no, no.

1:21:58🔗 Adam OK, now I just don't know what's up. I don't know what's down anymore. And let me tell you something. All I have out here is my confidence, people. That's all I bring. I don't have equipment. I don't have sound checks. I don't have a bass guitar. I don't have plates to spin. It's just my own instinct. I've been wrong every single time about this Jewish thing. And it's really starting to haunt me. I just can't, at least his side of the family, Jews. Right, Jill?

1:22:28🔗 Caller No, no, no, no, no.

1:22:29🔗 Trapt I really don't know.

1:22:32🔗 Caller At what point did you discover this? Or come to this conclusion?

1:22:36🔗 Caller Come to what conclusion?

1:22:37🔗 Caller No, I'm asking Adam, actually.

1:22:39🔗 Adam When I hear about the incest, when I hear about the teen pregnancy, when I hear about the sexual abuse, besides just what did you do? That's all. And then, and again.

1:22:50🔗 Caller Do you guys think that this is why he didn't call me back? Is it because now he realizes that I'm older and-

1:22:55🔗 Drew Jill, he's a, he's a criminal and he's a very disturbed person.

1:22:59🔗 Adam And then-

1:22:59🔗 Drew Do not expect anything from him.

1:23:01🔗 Adam And the last thing this guy needs is some chick. He banged when she was 12, who's now a year older than his current- A chick who's pregnant. I mean, this guy's a disaster.

1:23:13🔗 Caller No, I need to be worrying about anything happening to me in the future. Like I know, I always hear you guys say like, oh, you're an alcoholic. Now you were sexually abused.

1:23:22🔗 Adam Jill, here's the thing. You, you, you sound like you come from a horrible family. And it sounds-

1:23:28🔗 Caller Not that bad. Not that bad. And I'm not like weak or anything. Like I can-

1:23:32🔗 Adam No, you're, you're fine. You're fine. Yeah, you're going to need, you're going to need a little therapy. You're going to need to get focused. Not act out. I don't walk around-

1:23:43🔗 Caller No, I haven't at all. I've kept it secret.

1:23:45🔗 Drew What about the heavy sexual activity you had for the years following?

1:23:47🔗 Adam Yeah, we'll call that acting out.

1:23:48🔗 Drew Yes. Gio, you, you, you, you don't understand what you're dealing with. Please go see somebody. You're, you're, you're behaving as though you're an expert and understand all these things. You don't understand what-

1:23:57🔗 Adam Acting out sexually at a young age. I mean, it all points toward-

1:24:02🔗 Drew Judaism?

1:24:03🔗 Adam Yes, it points toward the temple. The 12-year-olds, hey, just right, hey.

1:24:07🔗 Drew You, you, you, you're, even you're thinking about this is wrong. The way you're thinking about it being good and bad and weak and strong and all those sorts of, sort of acronyms, those words you're putting on this have nothing to do with these situations.

1:24:20🔗 Adam I, I, I, I'll tell you, if I have a son who's just, you know, banging around with the 12-year-old cousin who's now in his, well, this is five years. He was now in his, you know, mid, mid-20s, got a 16-year-old pregnant. I'm just going to have a drifter kill him. That's going to be my thing. Just, let's just put him down.

1:24:39🔗 Trapt Lock him in the basement forever.

1:24:40🔗 Adam Just put the guy down. He's obviously, and I will label, I will decide that he's tortured and knows not what he does. And this is why he needs to be put down so fast to do it with horses and other animals. You know, why not humans? Horse didn't even do anything. It was just running along, broke its leg, pout, gets a bullet. This guy's single handedly destroying society.

1:25:01🔗 Drew Yes.

1:25:02🔗 Adam I mean, they don't they don't realize the wake they leave behind them. You got this poor Jill. They have, you know, she's questioning, you know, she's going to walk around for the rest of her life, remembering this incident. And then hooking up with people and having kids and then passing that trauma along to the kids.

1:25:21🔗 Drew That's right.

1:25:22🔗 Adam Being attracted to men who will traumatize her and the child.

1:25:25🔗 Caller Yes.

1:25:26🔗 Adam The legacy goes on.

1:25:27🔗 Drew There it is. This one cousin visiting over a weekend.

1:25:30🔗 Caller Sociopath.

1:25:31🔗 Adam Right. Let's stop them, everybody. Not Jewish. Man.

1:25:35🔗 Drew I'm just shocked.

1:25:36🔗 Adam Drew, I've never been right on that one either.

1:25:38🔗 Drew I know. Your instincts really fail you on that one.

1:25:40🔗 Adam Only on that one.

1:25:43🔗 Drew We usually, he's just Korean. Yeah. Yeah.

1:25:47🔗 Adam It could be Japanese. Yeah. You're right. Because that's another. Okay. We'll trap here. We'll take quick break. Be right back after this.

1:25:59🔗 Caller Call 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:26:01🔗 Trapt Operators are standing by.

1:26:03🔗 Caller Loveline will be back in a minute.

1:26:20🔗 Adam Yeah, everybody. It's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew.

1:26:25🔗 Drew Big finish. Come on.

1:26:26🔗 Adam Big finish. Here we go.

1:26:26🔗 Drew Crafts in the studio.

1:26:27🔗 Adam Crafts in the studio. Here we go. Jim. Hi. What's up?

1:26:36🔗 Drew Shall we?

1:26:37🔗 Trapt Yeah.

1:26:37🔗 Drew There you go, Jim.

1:26:38🔗 Trapt Cool.

1:26:39🔗 Drew All right.

1:26:39🔗 Adam It never, it happens every time you go, let's get it on. Come on, here we go. Let's ramp it up. What do you say now? And you're like, hello? Jim, here we go. 520 on the line. Uh, uh, uh, um, am I, uh, hello?

1:26:52🔗 Drew I'm always confused and it's always confusing.

1:26:54🔗 Adam Yeah. Here we go, buddy. Let's get it on, Jim. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

1:27:07🔗 Drew Try four.

1:27:08🔗 Adam Yeah. Cannot stop this bum rush. Jennifer, let's go. Let's get it on, baby doll. How say you? Yeah, here we go. What's up? Yeah. Corolla. Yeah, get it on. Let's go.

1:27:21🔗 Caller Let's get it on. I got two questions.

1:27:23🔗 Drew Yes.

1:27:23🔗 Caller The first question is for Dr. Drew.

1:27:25🔗 Drew Yes.

1:27:25🔗 Caller And the second one is for Adam. First one, Dr. Drew, if taking Sudafed for allergies, could it actually show positive for a mess on a urine or blood test?

1:27:34🔗 Drew Yeah, on the urine it could.

1:27:37🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:27:38🔗 Drew Not necessarily, but it could.

1:27:40🔗 Caller Is it something you can take every day or just like once and show up positive or is it something you have to have built up in your system?

1:27:46🔗 Drew No, it could show up right away.

1:27:48🔗 Caller Okay.

1:27:50🔗 Drew What's up?

1:27:51🔗 Caller I took a drug test. Well, I was at a party and I thought, oh, dude, I've never done this. It's kind of dumb, but I'll do it anyway just to see. And I ended up puking my reins out and hated it.

1:28:01🔗 Caller What's Sudafed?

1:28:03🔗 Adam No, it's smoked meth.

1:28:07🔗 Drew Yeah. Oh, smoked meth.

1:28:09🔗 Caller Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, a little retarded, I guess, but I thought, oh, let's just try it. You know, one of those put it under my belt kind of deal and a horrible experience.

1:28:18🔗 Adam You must have been up for two nights, right?

1:28:21🔗 Drew She says she smoked meth? Yeah.

1:28:22🔗 Caller I was in the UK for a night, but no, I didn't stay for days. I only, I took like three or four hits, I guess.

1:28:30🔗 Adam That's weird because you couldn't, you can't really hack it out of your system. If you drank something and you could throw it up, you could throw it up. But if you smoked meth, it's in you.

1:28:39🔗 Caller Yeah. And it made me sick, but it's horrible.

1:28:42🔗 Drew All right. What's the question?

1:28:44🔗 Caller Second question. So Adam.

1:28:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:28:47🔗 Caller So you say there's sex and then there's durex?

1:28:50🔗 Adam Yes. Yes.

1:28:51🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Is that a good enough plug?

1:28:54🔗 Adam Yeah, that's good. Why? What do you want?

1:28:57🔗 Caller The the package, the whole the condom.

1:29:02🔗 Drew Oh, yes, we get that. We're not giving those away anymore.

1:29:04🔗 Adam We stopped giving those away.

1:29:06🔗 Caller Oh, you did?

1:29:07🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:29:07🔗 Drew Yeah, that was nice. Nice try.

1:29:09🔗 Caller A breaker or anything?

1:29:11🔗 Adam No, we don't. Look, I've been on the show for 11 years. We don't have coffee mugs.

1:29:17🔗 Drew We have coffee.

1:29:18🔗 Adam We don't have coffee. That's a good point. I don't know. Is there is there a show that's been on as long as this show has been on that does not actually have a t-shirt or a logo or anything? Yeah. It would be an interesting, interesting question to put to the people. You show me a national show, TV or radio that's been on the air for over 10 years and find me one that does not have a t-shirt. And you understand I go to crappy concerts. There's guys who had record labels for 10 minutes that don't mean anything to anyone and they have t-shirts. Everyone has t-shirts these days.

1:29:53🔗 Drew It's a cool market distinctions. It's because we don't need that kind of thing.

1:29:58🔗 Adam Our marketing strategy is no marketing strategy. That's what makes us cool.

1:30:02🔗 Drew Right. It's counter-trade.

1:30:03🔗 Trapt No phrase that pays.

1:30:06🔗 Drew What is the phrase that pays again?

1:30:07🔗 Adam We're too goddamn cheap for t-shirts. That's the phrase that pays.

1:30:10🔗 Trapt That's a good one.

1:30:11🔗 Adam You say that, we'll send you out. Well, not a t-shirt. Ashley?

1:30:16🔗 Caller Yes.

1:30:17🔗 Adam You're 17?

1:30:18🔗 Caller Yes.

1:30:19🔗 Adam What's up baby doll?

1:30:21🔗 Caller About two months ago, on July 14th, I had a knee surgery on my right knee. Every four to six weeks, I'm going back to the doctor and they just look it over and send me help.

1:30:33🔗 Caller Well, it's still swollen.

1:30:35🔗 Drew What was the procedure?

1:30:37🔗 Caller Well, I tore my lateral meniscus on my right knee, like on the right side of it, the right side. They went in, cut off all my cartilage, so now I'm like retarded in my knee. And they just sewed me back up and sent me home that day. I go in every four weeks for it.

1:30:55🔗 Drew Ashley, Ashley, stop, stop your like embellishing with all this drama. You had an arthroscopy? They went in with a scope.

1:31:05🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:31:06🔗 Drew Those are always outpatient. I mean, for the most part, you go home with that.

1:31:09🔗 Adam I like, I always like this part where people get victimized by their hospital and their surgeon.

1:31:14🔗 Drew They sewed me up and sent me home.

1:31:15🔗 Adam I came in complaining of pain, so they said, take this. And then they left me there to, yeah. Let me explain how the hospital works. You go in, they cut you open, they do something, they sew you up, and then they send you home. What do you think? You move in?

1:31:30🔗 Drew Exactly.

1:31:31🔗 Adam You see old people at the hospital. What happened? You're like, oh, I got my tonsils out when I was 14. Well, it's easy. It looks like you're in your 80s now. Yeah, no, and they never sent me home.

1:31:39🔗 Drew Yeah. They don't cut your cartilage up. They take it out and they take it out not to make your knee, what do you say, retarded, but to make it better. Because the cartilage is.

1:31:47🔗 Adam Listen, I got a great plan. Ashley, next time, do it yourself, would you, sweetie? Just go in your garage and do it yourself. Don't let the man don't trust the man. Obviously, he's got it in for you. He doesn't want to give you adequate medical health, medical help. Just take care of it yourself.

1:32:02🔗 Caller And I didn't even go to a hospital.

1:32:03🔗 Caller I went to like one of those in and out surgery thingies.

1:32:07🔗 Drew That's how that's done.

1:32:08🔗 Adam Next time you do your own surgery. I'm just tired of everyone with their and I can't and they didn't even and they never even stop your whining.

1:32:16🔗 Caller I still want to know if that girl wants to blame her meth on her UA over Sudafed.

1:32:21🔗 Drew Well she said just one time she got, she didn't say exactly the whole story.

1:32:24🔗 Trapt She's gonna tell her mom or whoever's test night.

1:32:27🔗 Drew I did a Sudafed. Got you, got you.

1:32:29🔗 Adam Here's the other thing too, that's good thinking.

1:32:32🔗 Drew People, I thought in my head I went okay she got busted on that one night and then she has a follow-up test and she's worried about the Sudafed.

1:32:39🔗 Adam People don't have adequate health care coverage and then they complain about what they have or what they get which is they have no insurance, they don't take care of that at all, they have to go down to County USC and it's like I had to sit there for almost five hours before I was seen. Yeah, you do nothing. Let me explain how everything works and it's no, health care is no different. You don't want to pay for car insurance, you don't want to pay for this, you don't want to pay for that. Guess what? You don't get curbside service. You don't get gold glove treatment. You know, they don't put the white gloves on and have the valet meet you at the curb if you don't pay anything. Health care somehow is different than that because everyone has a right to it somehow and they don't think it's right that somebody pays for it and gets better service. I guarantee if you want to pay for it, you'll go to a better facility. If you don't, you'll go to the clinic and they'll boot you out.

1:33:36🔗 Drew County care is pretty good. It's just cumbersome. You do have to do a lot of waiting and that kind of stuff, but the care is actually good that they get.

1:33:42🔗 Adam Yeah. All right. Let's take a break. We'll be back after this. I want to thank Trapp for coming in tonight. God bless you too.

1:34:21🔗 Drew Don't wait two years this time. Yeah, that's ridiculous.

1:34:24🔗 Adam Someone in control, name of the CD out as we speak. And until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:34:35🔗 Caller This has been Love Line.

1:34:39🔗 Caller The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Love Line is Aningold.

1:34:49🔗 Caller Love Line is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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