1:20🔗DrewHey, everybody. That's right. No, Adam Corolla. I'm Dr. Drew, and he is Gavin Rossdale. No, yes, he's Gavin Rossdale, co-hosting with me tonight. You know him from Bush. You know him from the New Band Institute. Yes.
1:33🔗VoiceoverAnd now tonight, you're a doctor. I anointing you as a doctor. The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-1991. We will be taking your calls. And so it's great to see you.
1:41🔗It's been like eight years, some of the time, since I did this show.
1:56🔗AdamSurgery, I find them really helpful. You like that?
1:59🔗DrewI do a show on Discovery Health Channel, Wednesday night, midnight. If you guys are, it's called Strictly Sex. And we do, I'm the only host on television who gets to scrub in on surgeries, because I'm a doctor. I get to go do the penis enlargements, do the vaginal reconstruction.
2:12🔗I mean, that's a question. Not for me, a friend of mine wants to know.
2:15🔗DrewNo, a friend of yours, of course, needs this surgery. And yes, I was shocked. I was very skeptical. I still am. I still believe that guys that are that preoccupied with their schwans really have a self-esteem problem. But there are people that are outside of normal that might want to do this. And what they do is they cut the tendon that attaches it to the pubic bone. And then they actually hang weights off it for a few weeks and that pulls it out about an inch. And then they take the skin down and sew in some cadaver tissue. Basically looks like a pop tart. Don't vomit. You like surgery shows.
2:45🔗AdamAnd I like pop tarts. So that could be the end of it.
2:48🔗DrewOr it could put you on the other... I'm just saying, you could go the other way. And then they put the skin back and you've got another inch of girth that way too. And the urologist that does this out here in Beverly Hills claims he has the happiest patients on earth.
3:01🔗AdamYou know that philanthropy speaking, or what is it, anthropology speaking, I want a tribe, there was a tribe where they place pebbles inside the penis.
4:03🔗AdamAnd yeah, it's kind of like a real progressive modern rock record is what I think it is.
4:10🔗DrewI read some of the reviews and they were saying that it's very real. People would be very impressed with it. Substantial. Substantial reels, things like that were being. Good.
4:19🔗AdamThat's nice, isn't it? I mean, in this world of the crazy celebrity, it used to be coming up, celebrity was this sort of by-product of talent and achievement.
4:37🔗DrewDid you go to Sandhurst or Eaton or any of those wild places?
4:40🔗AdamI didn't. I didn't. I didn't. But I ran out of school.
4:43🔗DrewYou got there fast. Yeah. Think about the British system as compared to here. By the time you're in sixth grade, you've got about what we get after first year graduate school. You know what I'm saying? After college, your graduate school. That's about where you've been at sixth grade in England.
5:02🔗AdamIt all swings around about. I've always had this idea that maybe once people in America, when they got to college, they start getting really...
5:42🔗DrewNo, it was my wife. It was like, I've got to have my picture with Gwen. I remember meeting Gwen's dad, who seemed like a very delightful. Yeah, he's great. My wife's from Orange County, too. I think if my wife, not that she's unhappy in her life, but if she could pick another life, she would live your wife's life.
5:58🔗AdamYeah, a lot of people would jump for that. Yeah, she has a great life, my wife. She works hard.
6:04🔗DrewYou guys see enough of each other? Is it?
6:24🔗DrewEverything is easier. When she actually has a kid, you'll be blown away. You will think, Oh my God, how do they know these things? How do they do this? This is magic. Wow. Because part of their brain fires off that we just, it's just dead on us. Right. Very complex. Let's take some calls. Speaking of dead male behaviors, let's talk to Doug, who's 26. Hey, Doug?
6:47🔗Hi. Here's the story. My wife does not dig porn. She does not like that I look at porn. She's really adamant about it. And I like to I would like to respect that. I try to respect that. And it's like putting down smoking. You know, I find myself making excuses and going back to it all the time. And by my question.
7:09🔗DrewSo let me just get this straight. You love you're just perfectly fine with the fact that your wife hates porn. You'd love to respect that. But for now, just you should better forget it. You're going to keep watching it. Keep looking at it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, basically. Okay.
7:21🔗I just want to make sure I have her in. Where's the problem?
7:24🔗DrewWell, men like to... Part of the thing you understand is women experience pornography very differently than men. And she has to understand that too. I mean, that's one of the things you have to help her sort of straighten out on. Women feel threatened by and sort of feeling as though less than like... You look at porn, you feel less than... That mean anything about your wife? You know what I mean? I'm just saying, Gavin, if you were looking at porn, would it have anything to do with your wife?
7:49🔗DrewMales seek diversity, they look at stuff. He had to answer that way. I see a record wrangler's out there smiling. I was like, yeah, of course he had to. But no, the fact is males look at pornography because it's in them, it's in their sort of genetic makeup. And on the other hand, your wife has a point, and if she feels threatened by it, and she feels like exploitative of women, maybe you guys can kind of reach some sort of compromise.
8:35🔗DrewShe has a philosophical opinion that she feels strongly about.
8:39🔗And the thing that I'm troubled with is, I want to be able to get away from it, I want to be able to put it down, but I keep going back to it and it's so compulsive and almost addictive. And I was wondering if that's in any way common, is there any sort of legitimate research behind the notion of porn addiction?
9:00🔗AdamLegitimate research into men liking porn.
9:02🔗DrewNot men liking porn, but men being addicted to porn. And you really don't fit the addiction spectrum. You sort of are more in the compulsive bracket. Addiction really is needing higher levels of arousal and sort of getting into weird stuff and spending money and having real serious consequences and, by the way, having a family history of alcoholism and often having been sexually abused. That's sort of what creates the sexual addiction. There's a fellow by the name of John Seely and there's an organization. The organization is out there if you look on sexual compulsion and addiction on the web that actually are doing lots of research on, in fact, Masters and Johnson now does a lot of their research in this area. And these guys believe that porn addiction, internet porn addiction, is one of the most rapidly increasing mental health categories that we have going today. I'm not saying about the way you look at stuff, Gavin, that's normal.
9:48🔗AdamHey, I feel quite normal about this stuff.
9:52🔗AdamI mean, I think that maybe there's also something about, to say porn is a very, very wide spectrum. So it might be easy to understand what there is and also maybe some areas of porn that is made by women, you know, for women. And that may be a sort of some kind of middle ground that isn't so heinous.
10:17🔗AdamWell, because most of, you know, a lot of porn, traditionally porn began around the idea of for men. I mean, it's often sort of centered around, so the idea is that the viewer can put himself in the position of the person.
10:29🔗DrewWell, in fact, there's doing research now. I know some, I actually went down to Emory and participated in some of this, and they're doing functional MRI scans on men and women looking at porn. And it turns out when men look at porn, they have an absolute characteristic and reproducible pattern that pretty much all men get. They get a visual cortical response, they get an arousal response in the temporal areas, and in the amygdala, and they get this extremely powerful appetite response. In women, they get little less visual response, moderate to high levels of arousal, no appetite. So when they see porn, it doesn't trigger drive or appetite, it just triggers sort of an arousal. So it's a completely different biological experience for them, and we need to understand that. In fact, to trigger the arousal systems on the same functional MRI scans, you have to engage those women in intimate conversation. Then you see the drive systems kick in. Isn't that interesting? And the men are like, what, huh?
11:21🔗AdamWell, men, we're traditional, we just short circuit, right?
11:24🔗DrewIt's not traditional. It's in our genes. It's in how the brain functions, in the circuitry. And that's, listen, what makes you and me a man is a single little bit of DNA called a Y chromosome. What makes a woman a woman is two huge pieces called X chromosomes. What makes us a man is something very simple and it's decaying, it's getting less and less with time. So it has the same amount of information. You made pretty much all the same. What makes women women, each X chromosome is different. They have two huge ones with tons of diverse information on it. So it's different than what makes a man a man and it's diverse woman to woman. So it's why we have all these tremendous changes and tremendous differences that we all need to appreciate and not sort of pretend they're not happening.
12:02🔗AdamSo Doug, what are you going to do about this out of interest?
12:06🔗I don't know. I don't know. I'm still up in the air. You had mentioned a book and I didn't quite catch that. What was that?
12:16🔗AdamYou said on the internet they've been studying.
12:18🔗DrewOh yeah, the sexual addiction compulsivity. Just look up sexual addiction compulsivity. There's actually organizations out there around this.
12:23🔗AdamBut leave the cookies alone, yeah? Anything that pops up when you Google that kind of stuff.
12:28🔗DrewProfessional organizations. All right, let's get now, this is Anthony, 26.
13:02🔗DrewAnd then he wants to know. I was going to say that there's actually, it's very hard to change that for some men. I mean, people have tried for years and all kinds of therapies and stuff. And it turns out one of the most reliable ways to do that is with medication. And there's actually a medicine that can come out in about a year that will triple or quadruple this time.
13:21🔗AdamReally? Isn't it like kind of just anxiety-based?
13:24🔗DrewPeople speculate that it's associated with that. And it clearly is. But it's so deeply tied into the function of the autonomic nervous system that it's too simplistic to say it's just about being anxious. It has to do with how his engine works, really. His engine just is running at higher RPMs and trips more easily.
13:41🔗AdamRight. Well, good luck with that, Anthony.
13:43🔗DrewLet's play a game. We're going to play a game, Gavin. I'm with Gavin Rossdale and we're going to play a game called Germany or Florida. Adam, long ago, was sort of, even have discussions every day at Jimmy Kimmel Live. They do the writers table. They sort of discuss what's going on in the world. They all began realizing when something macabre and bizarre happened, it seemed to happen in either Germany or Florida. So now our callers call in and give us the story and we tell them where in the West base. With Germany or Florida. Angie, go ahead.
14:11🔗Okay. One unsuspecting victim surfing the Internet for a good time, arranged a rendezvous with his new found lover and rendezvous, rendezvous.
14:22🔗DrewSee, I'm talking about the British educational system compared to ours.
14:28🔗DrewAndrews from Bakersfield. They'll give her a break. So go ahead. She had a rendezvous.
14:31🔗With his new found lover and ended up in the chopping block, literally. His very last lover turned out to be a murderer but not just any type of killer. This killer had been harboring cannibalistic fantasies for years, aching to act them out. He raised a date with the fellow and during their lovemaking, whipped out a screwdriver and stabbed him beyond recognition. Later, he methodologically butchered the body, storing all the parts in his refrigerator. But his plan was foiled when he realized that he too was disgusted to eat the human flesh and cannibalism was not for him. The man was sentenced to a 13-year-old jail term.
15:15🔗DrewAll right, we got the picture. Angie, Germany or Florida?
15:31🔗AdamIt sounds very German, except the execution of it. No pun intended, because there was a case in Germany that just was I'm recently aware of where two men met on the Internet and they ended up.
15:44🔗AdamConsensual and they ended up frying his penis with garlic and onion.
15:48🔗DrewThat actually was one of our first Germany or Florida.
15:50🔗AdamObviously, and I spot La Chianti with it as well. But so, just for the sake of, it sounds German, but I'm worried that it didn't go through with it.
15:59🔗DrewSo I'm thinking. You're right. The screwdriver sounds Florida, but the rest of it sounds German. So I'm going Germany.
16:32🔗Hey, I, Gavin, I just have to say, I used to be a huge Bush fan, and I miss your music, and letting the cables sleep was like my song back in the day, man.
16:46🔗It's great. I was just wondering, I don't, I haven't cut up with your band, and I wanted to know if you're still together, what are you guys doing for the year? You know-
17:09🔗AdamBush has been- Okay. Bush has been on this kind of hiatus, and for the, you know, sometimes when people, it's not like I left Bush. I didn't really know what was happening. So in the meantime, I just continue to want to work, to desire to come in and be on this radio show and go out on tour and make records as I love to do. And so I began this band Institute and this new record comes out, I think it's the 13th of September. It's Distort Yourself. Could be the sixth. I, you know, what do I know? I'm only a singer, but so that comes out and we're playing in San Diego, our first show on Thursday at the Casbah. It's the first ever show. And then Friday, the Roxy up here in LA.
18:36🔗AdamBulletproof Skin. You know, what is it? It's my welcome return. It's the fact that I've been away and it's coming back with the gloves off. The survival song.
18:46🔗DrewInstitute Bulletproof Skin. Institute, Bulletproof Skin. You can actually download that song now on iTunes. Gavin Rossman's helped me out here tonight.
22:57🔗DrewNice to have you. It's been a long time. It feels like old home time. It's just really good having you back. I appreciate you coming in, and we will take a little break. The phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191. And when we get back, we've got Vince, who has something bulging on the top side of his genitalia. Love Line College is preoccupied by the strangest things, but we'll talk about that after this.
23:29🔗CallerLove Line is brought to you by Atlantic Records.
23:46🔗DrewThat's right, Love Line, Gavin Rossdale, in the seat, filling the big shoes of Mr. Corolla, whose show is premiering tonight on Comedy Central. I believe it's 1130. Those of you that are listening on Tuesday, you can still pick it up. I think it's Monday through Thursday. Anyone that wants to be in the audience there, it's 1-866-HEY-ADAM, H-E-Y-ADAM, at least the way he spelled it, God knows if that's correct or not. The band is Institute. We just heard Bulletproof Skin. They nicely crossed that off. Gotta love it. Yeah, it's great. And you can download that at iTunes. I promised Vince and his bulgingness, and here it comes. Vince, 22.
24:53🔗DrewYeah, let's get to your question. Yeah, get on. You love Bush, right?
24:56🔗CallerFrom what I have looked up on the internet, there are about six things that run along the top of the skin. Two, four things...
25:06🔗DrewOnly one you can see on top of the skin. The other stuff, the urethra and the artery and the vein that's deeper in the nerve too, that's all well into the soft tissues. You're not seeing any of that. If you have something you're seeing sort of on the surface...
25:20🔗CallerYeah, when I have an erection. I can't really see it when I don't have an erection though. There's two running along the outside.
25:34🔗CallerAnd one of them has hardened up to about the size of the vein on your arm.
25:40🔗DrewYou can actually get spontaneous clotting of the veins in the penis and that's actually rather a significant thing if that's happened to you. Is that what we're talking about? Yeah. Where it actually feels hard and ropey now?
25:53🔗DrewYou need to see a doctor about that, Vince. It could happen in a normal situation. I've seen that happen but it also needs to be worked up to be sure that you don't have an abnormality in your clotting system that you become for some reason hypercoagulable and that can be a significant problem. It can be a lot of different things can cause that but one place you would you see those sorts of things happen spontaneously can be in the veins on the surface of the penis.
26:18🔗CallerAre you giving plasmids, anything like that?
26:22🔗DrewGetting dehydrated, certainly that's a possibility so maybe they over dehydrate you with the plasma but you know you need a series of tests on your actual clotting system that's called protein C and protein S that they can be acquired as you age and as you sort of interact with the world, the environment. Things can change in your clotting system that can put you at risk and check it out. It's pretty simple. You might need to see a hematologist to get it finally checked out and also check out the, you know, it depends how much you really have to get into. Maybe just see an internist. They also would want to check that area down there to make sure the flow back into the pelvic area is okay. Sometimes tumors, lymphomas, things like that can affect the flow out and cause bulging veins down there. A little too esoteric for this show I think. Let's take Jessica 24. But, you know, good luck, Gavin, should you have the bulging issue, you'll now know. Jessica 24.
27:21🔗CallerUm, yeah, I could say I have a question. I had a baby four months ago and right now I am exclusively breastfeeding. And I was wondering if it's true that you can't get pregnant while you're nursing. I've heard a couple of different things.
27:54🔗DrewThere is that too. And in fact, that's part of the reason that, you know, women very often have a tremendous drop in their sex drive for that first year after having a baby. And some of that is God's way of preventing another baby from coming along. And also part of it is the breastfeeding. Because obviously, if you're using all of your resources to raise one child, you certainly don't want to be also having to suck the life out of you through a placenta. And yes, and as a result, we've evolved in such a way as for that to work like a contraceptive, but it's not super reliable.
29:25🔗AdamWell, the thing is, the way that I see it, you know, being English, we kind of don't go into these problems too much. What we try and do is we just say, I always looked at it like, well, when I get married, I really want to do it one time and one time I won't.
29:39🔗DrewYou know, we get a lot of, over the years, had British bands come in here and get very disturbed about doing this show. It's like, personal problems are personal.
30:08🔗DrewYeah, interesting. So Jessica, Gwen comes from a very stable family. So that predicts to some extent, look, Gab might screw it up, but it predicts to some extent that things are going to be good for them. And naturally, their relationship is not chaotic. You don't hear about a lot of stuff. They're paying attention to the relationship, spending time together. So they maintain a household. All the things that you're supposed to do to have a real relationship. Unfortunately, a lot of people that become celebrities and get into entertainment stuff come from very disturbed family systems and don't know how to establish stable relationships. And you can read about that in the Star. Yeah. Right?
30:41🔗AdamI like the speed with which a lot of couples, especially celebrity couples, get into trouble. No, they just like, they love someone one day, then the next week they love someone else the following week.
31:12🔗I don't know if it's my past with my dad, I guess you could say, or I've never really had a male fatherly figure in my family. I'm adopted and the parent that I live with now never got married. And my dad, he got my mom pregnant when she was really young with my older brother. As soon as he found out, he hopped the border over to California. They were in Mexico while this happened. And then as soon as he knew that she had my older brother, he came back and got her pregnant again with me.
31:58🔗AdamWell, I think that this is like a perfect example for me, objectively, where, you know, as opposed to looking backwards, as in to try to look through your parents' history as to why that might affect you, I would come more from an angle of like, what kind of boys are you meeting?
32:20🔗DrewWell, what happens, though, the way the brain works, though, is that things that terrorize us in childhood become sources of attraction in the young adult world.
32:27🔗But my mom is like such a great person. She's done such a good job for me.
32:30🔗DrewI know, but you have to learn to read your attractions. You need to not, what Gavin's bringing up is very much to the point, not go after the guys that are so interesting to you, because those are the guys that are not going to be available.
32:39🔗CallerWell, it's true, because I have a really wide range of guys that I do end up liking, like I...
32:44🔗DrewThe sign of stylistically, stylistically is one thing, but emotionally, they're going to fit a certain pattern, because that's your thing.
32:59🔗DrewAnd the ones that are? The ones that are, you sabotage, and the ones that aren't, aren't. That's kind of the way that works. But be like, look, you're on to it, you're 16, Gavin makes a great point, which is, look, so do something about it.
33:14🔗DrewWell, like, if like, instead of sabotaging the relationships with guys that are cool and available, try to have a relationship and hang in with it.
33:22🔗I do, but usually, oh, see, I'm never like broken up with a guy. The guy usually breaks up with me.
33:28🔗DrewOver nothing? Nothing you do contributes to that?
33:31🔗I don't know, maybe. I end up being a little bit clingy.
33:33🔗AdamSometimes also that, I mean, obviously, I don't know what's going on with you, but sometimes that thing where people feel more comfortable, you know, or more healthy to be in a relationship. When you're 16 and there's so much there for you that maybe it's a time to just hold back and just really take your time because there's no rush for you.
33:52🔗DrewRight, so you're clinging for stuff, you're desperately going after stuff, and yet you don't even know what it is to be in a relationship because you've never had a male in your life. These guys aren't working out.
34:00🔗AdamYou sound really sweet and you sound like you've got it all there for you and-
34:04🔗CallerIt's weird because I want to be a child psychologist.
34:08🔗AdamWell, then patience is a really good thing to take on board.
34:12🔗I'll tell you why. I'm not like, I kind of like realized that I did have a problem with it, so I've been like really trying to look deeper into like guys and like look for it, like say, like talk to myself and think, you know, can I actually have a relationship with this person or is he just going to cheat on me or just let me go?
34:29🔗DrewYou're thinking that way. Again, if you're 16, take it easy. You are interested in this stuff. Why don't you find a male therapist and go through the process of therapy and learn how to have intimacy in that sort of artificial context, so you can understand what that is and then you can take that whole experience with you into your professional life later on.
34:47🔗CallerOkay, I had one other really quick question.
35:09🔗DrewGavin, listen, that's it, that's it. Everything else, I really believe, everything else is fighting the process of dying. We really weren't supposed to live past 45 as human beings. And everything that we have to do after that is because we're dying. And anything else before that, unless you have some chronic medical problem or a genuine disease, diet, exercise, do you do anything special?
35:32🔗AdamI really enjoy getting out and smacking some balls around on a tennis court regularly just to really sweat it out and get away from the world of music and whatever else is going on. So I have my outlet like that.
35:43🔗DrewDo you have somebody to play with regularly?
35:45🔗AdamYeah, I play quite regularly with like lots of tennis players. They like the music. So I have a lot of, I get a lot of people that are really good and it's all relative. Does Ben play tennis? No, no, she does the gym stuff. She does the gym stuff. I like to do something that the exercise isn't inadvertent. It just seems to happen. It's a natural consequence.
36:19🔗AdamYeah, so it's really, really dedicated, that stuff.
36:21🔗DrewAnd you like to do it with a team, with other people, compete.
36:24🔗AdamWell, I just like to just get out there and just do something other than just like running on a treadmill.
36:30🔗DrewYeah, yeah. I always tell people to exercise, the best one is the one you'll do, you know what I mean? Understand yourself and do the one you'll do.
36:37🔗AdamWhat's the hardest thing about writing a song or writing a book, sitting down to do it?
36:44🔗DrewWell, you did it with Institute. Distort Yourself is the CD. It's coming out September 13th, it turns out. They're gonna be in Los Angeles at the Roxy on August 12th, Phoenix at the Clubhouse August 13th, Dallas Gypsy Tea Room August 16th, etc., etc., August 23rd, Minneapolis Ascot Room. It's gonna be quite a tour.
37:01🔗AdamThese are just like little club shows just to kind of get everyone into the idea of Institute is this new band that I'm in and getting excited for the record and then the proper big tour starts in October.
37:13🔗DrewOh, wow. Chicago August 24th, Pittsburgh August 27th. Check your local listing and we will take a break. Be back with Gavin Rossdale after this.
37:29🔗Keep things up with new Durex warming condoms.
37:53🔗DrewLove Line, Sounds Corolla. 1-800-LOVE-191, but Avec, Gavin Rostill. Thank you for joining us again. It's a pleasure to be here. Pleasure. The Institute is the band. Distort Yourself is the CD. Distort Yourself, it's out September 13th. There's a website, institutemusic.com, and we're going back to the calls. This is Robert's 21.
38:24🔗Gavin RossdaleI got a problem. I come from a broken home. My parents were separated when I was three, divorced when I was four. They played mind games with me and my sister to the point where I have trouble trusting anybody.
38:56🔗DrewThis is the Macy Dixieland's problem. Go ahead.
39:00🔗Gavin RossdaleSo one of the examples would be she didn't want them talking about their racist opinions. And so they... I kind of was treated like an outcast whenever family reunions came around only because they would, you know, they would hide what they actually believed because they didn't want, you know, my mom to...
39:24🔗DrewThat does not destroy somebody's feelings about their family of origin. No, no, no.
39:28🔗Gavin RossdaleBut wait, wait. I'm trying to get to this.
39:32🔗Gavin RossdaleSo later on in life, I kind of realized that they are racist. And I asked my mom about it. She doesn't know what I'm talking about. She would never do that to me.
39:44🔗DrewAll right. Whatever. You experienced this as fracturing. It really made you feel fractured internally.
39:56🔗DrewNo, I understand. And I would say, I bet that the things that really made you feel bad were far more unpleasant and painful and you just prefer somewhere, somewhere those are lost in the memory banks or just prefer not to think about those. The fact is it makes sense now that you'd have trouble trusting people or being into bad relationships. That's why that happens. In fact, there have been some studies on this and it shows that people that come from these kinds of family, not specific to what you're describing, but things like that, oftentimes have difficulty getting into a stable relationship till they're well into their thirties, like maybe even the forties sometimes. That is just something you eventually do get over, but it takes work and it takes time.
40:36🔗DrewIt just does. If you want to, if you want to hasten it up, it's about getting therapy. It's the only thing I know that can do it or go ahead and try it out. I mean, find somebody who's actually available for a relationship and see how it goes.
40:46🔗AdamAnd the other one, can I jump in there? Because you know one thing about, like Robert, you're saying like this idea of trouble trusting women. I mean, the thing about it is, is that you're probably right to be guarded about a number of women you may meet, but that doesn't mean to say there isn't the right one out there. It's just this sort of idea that, that they should all be trusted. I mean, you'll, you may, you'll never get to a point where you should all be trusted and you'd be right. You know, maybe your instincts are correct and you got to meet the right one.
41:11🔗DrewAnd the, again, this, this whole thing about, I can't, people are all good or all bad, suggests it's part of that whole fracture you felt when you were a kid. The fact is, humans all have their foibles. No human is all good. They all fail at certain things. They all trip and fall and screw things up and cause each other pain. That, we call that a relationship. And that's the way it goes. And you know what? It doesn't, doesn't mean the thing has to come crashing down because there's some stress and difficulty. You work it through if you commit yourself. If it's somebody you want to stay with.
41:42🔗AdamAnd is that also, I mean, if judgment is all self judgment, does that mean he doesn't trust himself? Like Robert, do you see yourself as a faithful person in a relationship?
41:52🔗Gavin RossdaleAre you asking me if I'm faithful?
42:25🔗CallerUm, my, um, my, um, second to oldest brother, he, um, he kinda, like, I didn't know it was wrong, and he would, like, touch me and kind of have sex with me.
42:44🔗DrewAll right. Well, that, that qualifies for sexual abuse, and that's sort of, uh, what, what leads to and what can put people at risk for sexual addiction and compulsion. Then if you have access to things like pornography at a young age, that kind of cements it in pretty good, Sierra.
43:00🔗DrewSo, uh, forget about the porn and really think more in terms of getting some help with having been so severely sexually abused. It's your brother having sex with you when you were how old?
43:11🔗DrewFive years old. That can be shattering. That's, that's, that, what, the people that, that study these things talk about it shattering your brain's ability to regulate. It reaches the upper limits of a child's brain capacity to understand what's going on. And it tends to be sort of shattering. So that's when you need help with. Tell, you know, I don't know if you have access to somebody or Vysalia, talk, maybe somebody at school, somebody, maybe your doctor, tell somebody what's happened. And please, if you don't want to live a very long and painful life, locked into this shame-based preoccupations that you have, that you think that you can't stop, you can, and you can get help, and things can feel better.
44:10🔗AdamSierra. Sierra, hi, this is Gavin here. That's so bad that happened to you, I'm so sorry. And I think that I'm listening to the advice you're being given, which is to just try and seek some help to share that and to try and work it out and you know what's amazing is how brave you are to ring up and express yourself at such a young age and ultimately what you're doing is taking steps towards a recovering from that.
44:36🔗DrewJust the fact that you called tonight, that you recognize that something's not right, you're reaching out for help. Three minutes in the radio is not going to do anything except teach you that there are people that can care about you and help, but you got to actually go get the help now. Yeah.
44:51🔗AdamYeah, and you get better, you know, you'll be fine, you know, because you sound like a really smart girl, so good luck with that.
45:15🔗CallerSo excited to hear the new Institute stuff, I love Bulletproof Skin, I just downloaded it on iTunes. Oh, thanks, Dana. I was just wondering if you were going to be doing any Bush songs or if you're going to stick to the Institute stuff.
45:28🔗AdamI thought at first when I was thinking about coming to do live shows, I was just thinking that I had an arrogance about Institute. I was like, no, I'm going to play Institute songs. But then when I canvassed a few people and thought about it myself, I thought it was unfair that, for instance, I'll take you as a perfect example that has been a great supporter of what I've done. I'd feel bad if I didn't play a few Bush songs for you. So I'm going to be playing a few Bush songs because I think that's what I would like to hear if I could be as objective as possible.
45:58🔗CallerI'm so excited about everything. You have to play Little Things.
46:02🔗AdamOkay. We're not sure we actually worked that one up. But there's a couple of others.
46:05🔗DrewAugust 11th, San Diego, August 12th, Los Angeles. Danny, you got to check it out, all right?
46:13🔗DrewCut her off. All right. Gavin Rossdale's joining us here in Adam Corolla's spot. CD comes out September 13th. Distort Yourself. The band is Institute. We're going to hear another song from them after the break. The song is called Boombox. You can download the song we just heard. Was that Distort Yourself? It was no. Billetproof Skin at iTunes. And there's also another website, institutemusic.com. Loveline will continue at 1-800-LOVE-191 after this. Love Line. Yeah, do you like the gorillas? I do.
47:56🔗DrewThat was my point too. Gavin Rossdale, Institute is his new band. The CD is Distort Yourself, out on September 13th. institutemusic.com or download. Is it just the one song at iTunes?
48:09🔗DrewOkay, let's take some calls. Jabba's been doing a great job with us tonight. This now is Mike 30. Yeah, hello? Hey Mike, what's going on? You're at Loveline.
48:18🔗Hey, cool. Hey, I have a quick question. Me and my wife occasionally, maybe once a week, have anal sex. I mean, we do other things. I don't want to talk about too much kinky stuff.
48:36🔗Is that something that can cause physical problems later? Or is it something that's just because it's not natural? If it's something that can have repercussions later on in life?
48:49🔗DrewWhat do you think? Just use your imagination for a second. As people age, that's a part of their body that doesn't work so well. It becomes what we call patchiless. It's hard to maintain the tone. It's the rectum can prolapse. You can get fissuring and hemorrhoids. No, that's normally superimposed on that. Somebody cramming something in there and ripping it apart regularly. Yeah, I predict more trouble. I say so. I'm not sure anybody's studied it formally yet, but I think we'll see more problems. Yeah. Makes sense, right?
49:32🔗Gavin RossdaleYes. Hello, Drew. Big fan, long time listener. First time caller, though.
49:37🔗DrewGavin Rossdale is joining us tonight? Yes, Gavin. I've heard your name. Hang on a second, I'm sorry. I'm going to interrupt you for a second. I've heard your name pronounced Rossdale and Rossdale. What's that?
50:57🔗DrewYour chi is going to suck right out of your body and you're going to turn inside out. What, Gavin?
51:02🔗AdamNo, I just was intrigued. Is that after you've had like a long session or obviously that can't come when you just like have a quick session. I mean, that's like five minutes. I mean, that's a long time.
51:14🔗Gavin RossdaleI don't understand it either. And I'm starting to wonder if some of the meds that I'm on might might have something to do with it.
51:23🔗DrewWhat I understand, I can understand you having contractions for five minutes. I can't understand fluid coming out with each contraction and you're not becoming dehydrated.
51:30🔗Gavin RossdaleAnd yeah, I do become very dehydrated. And so as of late, I have refrained from sexual intercourse.
51:38🔗DrewNo way. Yes. No way that you ejaculate so much that you become dehydrated.
51:42🔗Gavin RossdaleYes. There have been times where I've actually passed out from dehydration and I've ended up in the hospital.
52:23🔗Gavin RossdaleThey think I might be bipolar on top of that. Right. They've got me on Wellbutrin, they've got me on Paxil, Zoloft, Prozac. I mean, they've got me on-
52:40🔗DrewThat doesn't sound right. That's a multiple serotonin reuptake inhibitor. Sounds kind of wild. What anti-psychotic medicines do you want? Zyprexa?
52:51🔗Gavin RossdaleThey've got me on Seroquel. Yeah. And now my doctor is almost looking into doing some kind of patch. He hasn't given me a name, but some kind of anti-psychotic patch.
53:05🔗DrewAll right. Okay. Well, here's the deal. We're going to talk about you behind your back again for a second. The anti-psychotic patch is the tip-off here. That means he has abnormal perceptions and thoughts about things. And so his perception of what's happening may be different. On the other hand, the Seroquel in some of these medicines can cause prolonged ejaculation, prolonged sort of contractions, but just not a physical way. People don't understand this about their genital males, genital tract. The sperm mixes with something created from the prostate, and then it's stored in something called the seminal vesicles, which are two little sacs that sit under your prostate. When you ejaculate, they empty, and that's it. They're empty. Now they can fill back up again after a little while, but they're empty. They don't, it's not like there's some continuous flow from somewhere. It has to be manufactured, mixed in, fill up the sac, and out it comes.
53:54🔗AdamThat's what I find intriguing. What I'd love to, wanted to ask Quentin was, was if he felt better post all these medications, I mean, what was the difference in his life between before he got all these medications and now?
54:08🔗DrewWell, if he's got a thought disorder, that's when you end up on the street and talking to yourself.
54:21🔗DrewThis is a prostate gland. And this, see this thing that's filled up here? That fills up with the fluid that's made by the prostate gland and pumps from the sperm and all mixes together in here. And it's not like the testes are continually producing something. Stuff just sort of leaking its way into here in these vesicles. And when they empty, they empty.
54:54🔗CallerMy question is, my dad doesn't believe me that his brother, he molested me as a young age. I was about four at the age. He touched me, but that really messed me up.
55:13🔗DrewIn a sexual way or could you misinterpreted things or could it just scared you?
55:17🔗CallerHe did. He molested his granddaughter later in the years. Now he's, I guess, running away from the cops. But the thing is, I don't know how to convince my dad that he did do it. I mean, my dad thinks that how can I remember something like that that happened to me at a very young age?
55:39🔗DrewYeah, I think, Cynthia, the way to think about this, I think it's horrible when parents question a child's reporting these traumatic experience. It just reconfirms your shame and your feelings of responsibility and aloneness with all of this. The fact is, though, the reason, one of the reasons parents do this, I think it's sort of a common motivator, it's so painful for them to realize that they failed you, that they'd rather put it back on you than take the responsibility on for themselves. It's too painful. And especially when it involves someone they care about and trust it. It's just overwhelming for some people. And particularly, they themselves have been a victim of abuse. They, you know, that one of their things, they go into child rearing is, this will never happen to my kids. Yet magically, the way the brain works is, they inevitably set it up in such a way without knowing that it happens to their kids, too.
56:29🔗AdamWhat's your relationship like with your dad on other things? I mean, does he believe you on everything else?
56:35🔗CallerWell, he thinks I'm a big old whore, but I'm a virgin, and I'm going to wait until I'm married.
57:22🔗AdamShe believes you because you're her daughter, and why shouldn't she believe you? You know, you tell the truth to her. I mean, you need help here. Sorry to hear that.
57:29🔗CallerI want to go to the police, but like my father, like I don't know. I'm afraid that he might, like...
57:35🔗AdamWhat would you be trying to do? You want to see him punished for that? You're talking to Gavin. You're on the radio. Don't worry about it. Slightly more than the phone, but don't worry. It's only 6 million listeners.
58:13🔗DrewWelcome back to our show, Cynthia. Cynthia has been abused by her uncle. My dad won't believe it. He's an abusive asshole, and the mom's on her side. This is up to you. You can call Department of Social Services. It's going to be a grueling process for you. There's going to be no way to prove it. It's going to be your word against his kind of thing. But at least you'll have established a record. You probably won't have enough there to put him in jail. But at least if somebody else comes forward, there'll be a trail there, a pattern. Okay?
58:43🔗DrewAll right, and then maybe also they'll refer you for some help on your own. Because again, having been through all that, we've sort of developing a theme here tonight, which we often do.
58:51🔗AdamIt's bad enough to go through that, but then to then try and express yourself and to be disbelieved. I mean, obviously for a, you know, there's one thing that also comes across a lot of these situations, seems to me, as a layman, which is the whole generational thing. So a kid who's Cynthia, you know, and she, her father doesn't want to believe that because then he has to start looking at his own brother in a whole different perspective, a whole light that he doesn't want to see him in there.
59:17🔗DrewExactly. And humans follow very particular patterns of behavior. It's sort of a typical situation is a woman gets abused as a child, she marries a man who's a sexual abuser who does it to her children. The child steps forward and says this happened to me. Mom goes into sort of a dissociative state of fugues and can't deal with it. And the child feels unsupported and they should not believe. Catherine, you have a question for Gavin?
59:42🔗CallerYes. I'd first like to say that I've been a huge fan for a long time. And we're actually me and my friend Anne are going on tour to go to the last four shows.
1:00:10🔗AdamYeah. Maybe. I mean, the thing is for right now, it's really all about the music and it's such a relief for me. And weirdly enough, on the few movies that I worked on, all the grips and all the kind of technicians on it would be like, where's the record? You know, and I sort of felt guilty, like I was betraying my primary love, which is music. So no plans just right now, but at the same time, there's no harm in reading things that come my way and keeping an eye open. But right now it's all about Institute.
1:00:42🔗DrewSo nothing you're reading has got your fancy.
1:00:44🔗AdamThere's a couple of things that are really great and they may be going next year now. So it's just right now, I mean, I've really put my heart and soul into this record. And I'm just really grateful about being given the chance to get out there and have the record come out and go play it. So that's my main, that's my only focus.
1:01:10🔗CallerWell, I've been dating this black guy for a while and my dad is really, really racist.
1:01:16🔗DrewAnd it's really interesting how this happens all the time. It's like, you know, dad's an a-hole, dad's a racist. So first thing a daughter does, goes get a boyfriend that's from another race. And I'll show dad kind of thing.
1:01:29🔗CallerYeah. Well, my question was, is it's been getting kind of serious. And my dad knows that I've been dating somebody, but he doesn't know that he's black. And he's been asking for me to bring him over. But I think that he's been really busy with work and school and stuff like that to avoid the situation. But it's getting kind of hard for me to continue with it. So I was wondering if I should bring him over and just like do what happens or if I should try to end the relationship.
1:01:58🔗DrewOh, and I would end the relationship because of this. But what do you think, Gavin, I'm putting you on hold because your phone lines are worn.
1:02:03🔗AdamMy phone is crackly. I think that it's, you know, love is the most important thing. So it's really about if you have a relationship with someone that you trust and brings the best out in you and you bring the best out in them, you move forward from there. And you know, for someone, for your father to be racist is a plainly wrong way of living. So it's not trying to teach him something new, but it's maybe...
1:02:30🔗DrewSo let me, I'm going to slow you down. So it's not about reacting to him.
1:02:33🔗AdamNo, it's really, it's not about reacting to him. As long as you're not doing it in order to get back at him in any kind of a way to rebel against him. And if it's heartfelt and it's soulful love, well, let it take its course and tell him gently.
1:02:47🔗DrewSo you tell him first, or would you actually bring the guy over and go, here he is, it's Joe. There you go, enjoy.
1:02:53🔗AdamNo, I think out of respect, she should tell him.
1:02:56🔗AdamNot have him, not have him find out in front of the guy.
1:02:59🔗DrewYeah, I don't think, A, you don't want to put the guy through this, why include him in your dad's craziness. And Amy, there you are. Amy, why would you want to put your boyfriend through this, number one, although you may feel he's supported and sort of have somebody there for you against your father, but it's not really his business. Your boyfriend shouldn't have to put through this, A. B, I agree with Gavin, it's sort of disrespectful of your dad to sort of spring something on him.
1:03:26🔗AdamTell him what's happening and if he doesn't like it, explain to him that this guy makes you happy and he treats you with respect and no father could ask for anymore.
1:03:33🔗DrewAnd you'd like him to meet him. That's it. And what are you going to do? How he's going to react? How he's going to react?
1:03:52🔗CallerYeah. So my problem is about like three months ago, I had a rock climbing fall and I pretty much shattered my entire left side of my body from my hip to up to my shoulder.
1:04:30🔗CallerYeah. But I didn't want to track down my GPS.
1:04:34🔗DrewSo what did you trigger? Some sort of alarm or something?
1:04:38🔗CallerNo, I was on my side. I actually called the police on my cell phone and my cell phone as GPS. So they should have been able to find me, but they said they couldn't. So I had to hike over a mile out.
1:04:48🔗DrewOh, my God. How long did that take you?
1:04:50🔗CallerOver an hour, and that's why my heart just about gave out because of all the adrenaline going through it.
1:04:56🔗DrewWhat do you mean your heart gave out? What happened?
1:04:59🔗CallerNo, my heart didn't go out. It's just like as soon as the ambulance got to me, they had to inject me with something to take my adrenaline off because all the adrenaline pumping through my heart was giving it a hard time.
1:05:08🔗DrewWell, it gives it a rhythm disturbance, but that's just something that happens when you're in a high state like that, a stress state. You had a young heart, it's not going to give out. So, are you on medication now?
1:05:21🔗CallerNo, I'm actually off of it because I was on a Percocet Lord Test and viking it for a while and they said that stuff was damaging my liver and so I wanted to quit taking it.
1:05:31🔗DrewWell, if you were on enough to damage your liver, you were certainly on enough to stop your erections.
1:05:35🔗CallerYeah, well, I don't know what stopped it. It just stopped having to be able to get one since my fall. So I don't know if it was the medication or if something happened during my fall or...
1:05:44🔗DrewHow long have you been off the opiates?
1:06:12🔗DrewYou know, you should see a urologist to make sure there's not some sort of internal injury that occurred here. But I bet it's just all those opiates. I mean, it takes a week for your body to recover from that. Reasonably, two weeks also would not be a reasonable period of time, an unreasonable period of time for you to just withdraw from those substances. So I'd be more inclined to blame... You're on high doses of opiates. I'd be more inclined to... Are you... Let me ask you one other thing. Are you doing anything else? You smoke a lot of pot or anything else you're doing? No. Nothing. All right. But then, of course, also, you had a huge injury. It's possible some sort of internal injury occurred. The possibilities of that are sort of numerous. I don't want to list all those right now. Get it checked out, but I think it's probably the meds. Al19. Al? Caller goes by Al.
1:07:10🔗CallerHey, all right. Well, I've been going out with this girl since about January. And I don't know. It's been like kind of a normal relationship. And then like somewhere in between like March and April, she's had like kind of like depression problem, stuff like that. And she went to see like whoever you see about that. And she was diagnosed with bipolar disease.
1:07:35🔗CallerThe question is, is I tried to break up with her a couple of weeks ago because I was not really into her anymore. And she threatened to commit suicide. And she pretty much almost did. So and she's a cutter on top of that. So I took her back. I was like, oh, no, it's all right.
1:07:54🔗DrewOh, boy. You want to know how to get out?
1:08:00🔗AdamThat's a really tricky one. I mean, because now you're taking on responsibility for her, which is totally imbalanced and unfair and inappropriate. So it's you coming from an unhealthy standpoint.
1:08:13🔗AdamIt's taking it from the point of view of whether you want to be with her or not. Like you said, you don't really want to be here, be there for her. So very, very tricky. But you really ultimately cannot be responsible for someone else because people have to take their own responsibility. So I think it's all about being gentle and trying to explain your position, right?
1:08:31🔗DrewSo keep the pressure up, keep trying to get out.
1:08:34🔗AdamI think, I think unfortunately that is the case. And maybe it's a case of perhaps speaking to people, her family or friends she has.
1:08:43🔗AdamAnd trying to get support for her otherwise.
1:08:45🔗DrewPrecisely. I think build a structure around this. Tell her family, tell her friends, maybe even tell the physicians and whatnot, therapists are taking care of her. So she has something to fall into when she begins to act out, when you in fact do leave. And when you do make your move, be swift and sure. Just got to be out and that's it. No contact, no nothing and you get away. Because any contact is going to lead to tremendous chaos. And it's really tough, and you want to be a human being and you want to really be concerned about this woman who could genuinely hurt herself based on what you do. But as Gavin is absolutely right, you're not responsible. And that's no kind of relationship, but that's a hostage. That's not a relationship. All right, Gavin, you having fun so far? Still having fun?
1:09:36🔗DrewAll right, let's get some, hey, Patricia, get us some more upbeat calls. We would call them bowling pins and the rare calls. Come on, here we go. Come on. Let's break it down, guys, as Adam would say. Gavin Rossdale, the new band is Institute. The CD is called Distort Yourself. It's out September 13th. They have a website, institutemusiconeword.com. You can check out the tour dates on the website. Is that right?
1:09:59🔗DrewTour dates coming up. You can also download Bulletproof Skin at iTunes. Somebody just called us and told us they had done that, in fact. And God bless them. And I'm not going to, I'm not going to, well, we got a chlamydia call, we got a virginity call. But I want to get some more sort of classic loveline calls. Really impressed, Gavin. So bring those on in and we'll be back with 1-800-LOVE-191. We'll do that again. 1-800-LOVE-191, more loveline after this.
1:10:26🔗CallerYou can't articulate yourself any better than that.
1:10:54🔗DrewThat's right, Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191. Gavin Rossdale tonight. Institute is a new band. And since it's Loveline, I can't help but ask you about your own life and relationship. How did you guys meet, you and Gwen?
1:11:08🔗DrewWas it love at first sight kind of thing?
1:11:10🔗AdamI met her at Universal Amphitheater. It's kind of set the pattern for our relationship. A lot of backstage. And well, the funny thing was that the story goes that we were on the same label, and they sent me the CD of the music. And I was like, well, her music of the Tragic Kingdom record. And I was like, well, there's some really, I understand some of the songs are really good on here, but I didn't see the connection between the two bands.
1:11:34🔗AdamSo I just, I found it a little confusing until I met Gwen. And then she came backstage to meet her. And at that moment I thought this was the greatest idea, the best band we could ever go on tour with.
1:11:50🔗AdamSo from that point on, it was great. And then when I first saw her on tour, she came out to, and she was actually, I remember I was sound checking and she came into the arena and was on the roller blades. And I felt the love from like 300 feet away. I could just, I thought she was great.
1:12:17🔗AdamI think it was pretty mutual, but she's a, you know, a good girl. So she just, you know, it was a few weeks. And then we've actually finally just found a way to be together in New Orleans. And we drank the Hurricanes at Mardi Gras. We had a fun night. And then I guess you could say we've been together ever since.
1:12:38🔗DrewDid you imagine this was a person you'd marry?
1:12:42🔗AdamNo, not necessarily. Because at that point, I just wasn't even convinced I could ever meet that.
1:12:46🔗DrewBecause of your family of origin experience?
1:12:48🔗AdamWell, just also because I just felt that...
1:12:52🔗AdamI used to always ask my friends, let me put it another way, I used to ask my friends who had made the leap to get married. I'd say, I'd be really intrigued by that. I was like, how do you... What is this club that you guys are in? What happened? What door did you go through? And it's one of those really frustrating things that you just have that moment where you just figure it out. You kind of have a... You're facing two doors, and you know which one to go through. It was just pretty...
1:13:32🔗AdamWell, it wouldn't be monogamous. You know, so I just figured that I was gonna be hard pushed to meet anyone remotely is amazing. So I made that plunge and here I am.
1:13:49🔗DrewThree years. And was there anything surprising about marriage?
1:13:54🔗AdamJust the fact that you have to... As a man, you really learn the art of compromise. You really just realize that there's a quick way to resolution, which is to agree.
1:14:05🔗DrewI'm not sure that's compromising so much as capitulating.
1:14:09🔗AdamPerhaps, but you're smarter than I am, so I call it compromising.
1:14:13🔗DrewLet's take another Gavin question. She may be listening. This is John 24.
1:14:18🔗CallerHey, I just have a quick question for Gavin. How does the rest of Bush feel about this other project? And do they have you blessing and everything? And also I'm surprised at the amount of depth that Gavin has shown on the show tonight.
1:14:31🔗DrewReally? You didn't know that about him?
1:14:35🔗AdamThank you. Well, it's a bit like in a way. It's kind of quite a motive for me to talk about it because on one hand with the rhythm section, Dave and Robin, I feel bad for those guys because I know they would like to be still doing Bush. But really this came about from the guitar player just making a very fair decision and respectable decision, really wanting, he missed his first kid growing up, the first couple of years of his kid's life. Then the second child he had, he was at home more and really got to really dig the changes that we traditionally hear about every single day. There's a different look on the kid's face and those kind of things. He just really took the decision that that's where he felt his life was for now. So really, the truth about it is that the three of us was sort of left dangling and not knowing what to do. Me doing this band, Institute, it was just my desire and refusal to allow that to get in the way. I just wanted to continue making music and I've been lucky enough to find this other band to be in. So that's the bottom line. So I think I have some blessing, but probably some less blessing feelings from some of them.
1:15:46🔗DrewSpeaking of this other band, why don't we hear another song from Institute?
1:20:28🔗DrewThat is Institute, the song is Boombox. We almost heard another song there by Institute. They can't download that one at iTunes though, is that right?
1:20:37🔗AdamNo, that's right. That's Boombox, and that's just off of the record.
1:20:41🔗DrewDistort Yourself is the record. You can get it on this September 13th.
1:20:44🔗AdamA really appropriate track for Lovelines, with the chorus being Lovers and Dangerous Love Will Find A Way Through Everything.
1:20:51🔗DrewGavin and I were talking off the air about, on Loveline, we talk about the more extreme situations, and I'm always afraid on Loveline, we're going to give the impression that if you've got a little bit of drama in your relationship, oh forget it, it's over. And I'm really not saying that. I'm saying if it's built on a history of real serious abuse and stuff, then the probability is you're going to have trouble. But all of us, drama, a little passion, it's not a bad thing. It's a human thing.
1:21:18🔗DrewHere's, you and Gwen, a little drama, a little...
1:21:20🔗AdamAbsolutely. And passion, it's all about that.
1:21:24🔗DrewDrama. All for that. That's the common, too.
1:21:25🔗AdamAlso, drama, bits of drama, but there's something we were talking about, when you get married, some of the drama, because that's like the histrionics of it, comes down to a bit more realistic. But definitely the passion, always the passion, always the romance.
1:21:39🔗DrewAnd Gavin was saying that they'd fight, but then go, we share the same bathroom. All right, let's just get along, forget it. Let's figure this out.
1:21:45🔗AdamYou can't disappear for two days anymore.
1:21:47🔗DrewYou can't just go to an office and get an email. People do that, you know? They do it. When they are used to that kind of chaos, they'll do that.
1:22:24🔗DrewIt could be gonorrhea, it could be non-gonococcal urethritis, it could be chlamydia, it could be a lot of things, but it's not syphilis. Syphilis is a ulcer that goes, it's painless and it goes away. Then a few weeks later, you get a rash all over your body, classically on your palms as well. So there you go. You don't have syphilis.
1:22:41🔗CallerOkay. But gonorrhea can be treated and taken care of pretty quickly.
1:22:59🔗CallerI just want to say I'm a really big fan. I've worked nights, PM 3 to midnight or 11, and I've been listening to you guys for years. Cool. Adam, you're very talented.
1:23:14🔗DrewToo bad Adam's not here tonight. Adam is-
1:23:17🔗DrewHe's going all week. But we do have an interesting week. We have Gavin Rossdale. There are people co-hosting with me on his behalf. Gavin's in here tonight from Bush's New Band Institute. Nicole Sullivan tomorrow night. Got Jimmy Kimmel, the great Jimmy Kimmel on Thursday night. And what's your question, John?
1:23:31🔗Well, don't you have to ask John why he would think that?
1:23:40🔗AdamHe's been off work for a few days, fair enough.
1:23:42🔗DrewOff work. It's one thing if you- Okay. It's one thing if he didn't know I was here. But if he didn't notice that Adam wasn't yapping, I don't know how you could miss that.
1:23:51🔗CallerThat's at a phantasm's point. My radio is being worked on and it's not working right now, so I can't hear you. I just called. I actually identified my problem by listening to you for years and finally realized that I have a sex problem.
1:24:06🔗CallerWell, I just- Every time I'm in a committed relationship, I just- I feel the need to continually be with other women and I really don't want to-
1:24:15🔗DrewYeah, you're 25. Some of that is just not being ready for a committed relationship.
1:24:33🔗DrewSo you make sure that that sabotages the relationship?
1:24:36🔗CallerWell, I think so. This is what I've been getting from listening to you.
1:24:39🔗DrewWell, it's not like you cheat- you're not a secret cheater. You're a cheater who you make sure the girlfriend finds out and you screw everything up.
1:24:46🔗DrewSo you key of trouble with intimacy, basically.
1:24:50🔗CallerWell, yeah. That's what I'm wondering if I do because, you know, I've only been in a couple of committed relationships and both times I- and I didn't notice- I didn't realize this until I've been listening to you guys and I hear what you can tell on other people.
1:25:04🔗DrewDo you come from a family where there's trouble?
1:25:08🔗CallerYeah. My parents were pretty messed up as far as their relationship went. I mean-
1:25:11🔗DrewAll right. So it's tough for you to have intimacy. It's just tough for you to trust that. You'll tend to not know it when you have it and sabotage it when you do. That's part of coming out of that kind of a family system. But the fact though is still you're 25 and I don't know, guys at 25 sometimes can be pretty squirrely and not be ready or sort of capable of being in a committed relationship. And that's okay too. Just don't kid yourself. You don't have to have a committed relationship at 25. Gavin, you agree?
1:25:37🔗AdamDefinitely. I mean, I think it is really difficult, especially when the media and the world is based upon the beauty allure of women. And at 25, it's all about proving yourself to yourself and to your friends. And plus, I'm sure some alcohol is involved and losing perspective here and there. I just think that hang on in there. And when the time is right and you find the person you want to be committed to, you will. So I think the trick that all of us learn is just understanding consequences. And if you can find consequences to your actions, it's a pretty surefire way of trying to curb some of that behavior before you enter into an adulterous situation. Maybe you want to think of the consequences and what you might be losing, and that might stop you or not.
1:26:27🔗DrewAnd again, you're 25, you're 28, 29, and you want to be in a committed relationship and can't, it's the time for therapy. Really, that's about if you really want to go at, how can I solve this problem? That's how you can solve that problem. Phone number here is 1-800-LOVE-191 with the great Gavin Rossdale. The gentleman, Gavin Rossdale, who's been kind enough to fill in for Adam Corolla. His new band is Institute. September 13th, the CD is coming out. It's called Distort Yourself. And Gavin and I, Dr. Drew, we'll be back after this.
1:27:23🔗DrewGentleman scholar Gavin Rossdale is in here tonight his new band is Institute, and we were just talking about the fact that I was at the happiest place on earth this afternoon, Disneyland, with my kids, because my son's got a baseball tournament down in Placentia. You're gay. No, no. Now where your wife grew up in Anaheim. My wife's orange from the OC also. And you were just saying that you'd be able to go to these parks and-
1:27:48🔗DrewI'm surprised you guys can walk through a park like that.
1:27:50🔗AdamWell, it's probably, yeah, sometimes not the greatest idea, but I was just, the story I was telling was how funny it is, how like when we're queuing up on the line and how people are really excited to see it first.
1:28:00🔗DrewWhen there's that back and forth backtracking line.
1:28:02🔗AdamWhen the line by the fourth time around is seeing us, they kind of over it, you know, hey, Gavin and Graham, whatever, you know, it's seen that, get past me, hot dog.
1:28:08🔗DrewBecause you're coming by face to face to see people over and over each time you go back and forth.
1:28:13🔗AdamThe first three times is very exciting. The next eight times gets less so.
1:28:17🔗DrewOf course, they're now, I bet you I know it's going through their mind too, which is that they're embarrassed about how they reacted three times ago. Three go-rounds ago. Yeah, just waiting in lines for an hour. It's good times, good times.
1:28:30🔗DrewIt's great to see the new rides. Of course, the new rides are like two hours. Swim back to the Tiki house. Nothing like those old rides. Okay, here now is Scott 19. What's going on, Scott?
1:28:45🔗DrewOh, nice. Dropped the F before you even got in here.
1:28:48🔗AdamTobacco and swearing. I like it. You got a future.
1:28:51🔗DrewWell done. Let's get to the question for Gavin. It's A21.
1:28:54🔗CallerHi. I'm just laughing about the previous caller.
1:28:58🔗AdamHe's pretty funny. He's not. He's really mad at his friend.
1:29:02🔗CallerYeah, it sounded like he had some issues going on.
1:29:03🔗CallerHis friend wouldn't give him a cigarette.
1:29:05🔗CallerDr. Drew, I think you're great. You're so wonderful and patient. And I'm a huge fan of Gavin. I think the new music sounds great. That last single was really, really, really good. Yeah, it was good.
1:29:17🔗CallerYeah, I was just wondering what current bands are you listening to?
1:29:21🔗AdamUm, right now, I mean, there's that record, Arcade Fire, these guys from Montreal. And it seems to be what's weird is this kind of situation where a record just starts to catch fire just slowly and everyone seems to be talking about them. And it's a really cool record, Arcade Fire. And also, I listen to, I like TV on the radio. I like that band a lot. They're kind of weird and interesting from Brooklyn. And then Reggae Stations and obviously K-Rock.
1:29:56🔗CallerOf course. I also had to say thank you so much. My boyfriend and I had our first dated Bush show and we've been together for five years.
1:30:13🔗DrewHey Jennifer. Jennifer from the OC also. What's going on?
1:30:16🔗CallerOh yeah. Great. I'm good. Thank you. No, my boyfriend and I were out with a couple of friends the other night. We were drinking and just bar hopping and stuff. And we were kind of drunk and they did pull the whole a few girls kiss, full kiss type thing.
1:30:29🔗DrewOh yeah. And by the way, that's your boyfriend right now saying, Are you on the radio right now?
1:30:33🔗CallerNo, no. He doesn't know I'm calling. No. So we kissed anyway. And it was over. And then when we were going to our next destination, the girl kind of pulled the move on me and I just went for it. And we started kissing again. And my boyfriend got upset. And I wasn't aware that he was getting upset. And he was pissed off. And he, we went down to the beach. And he ended up leaving me at the beach. It was about three o'clock in the morning.
1:30:59🔗DrewYou and he went down to the beach or you and this girl went down to the beach?
1:31:02🔗CallerAll of us, all of us four. So my boyfriend, the girl and the girl's other friend. And then we walked off and we were at the beach. And then he ended up leaving. And I was all by myself at the beach at three in the morning.
1:31:14🔗DrewYou and he walked off together and then he just abandoned you there?
1:31:18🔗DrewAnd did you have a fight or something?
1:31:21🔗CallerWell, we started talking and he, we were talking about like moving out and stuff. And he asked if I wanted to move in with him. And I said, no way, cause I can't deal with his mom. And he ended up leaving. And I was like, oh, whatever. They're probably down the beach. Eventually I like went back down cause I figured it was probably time to leave and they were all gone.
1:31:44🔗CallerYeah, I should write a book or something. No, when I asked him the next day why he was so pissed, he felt that I had cheated on him with this girl. And I'm not a bisexual or anything. And I would just want to know like, am I in the wrong? Should I have not done that?
1:31:57🔗DrewOr is he like, Well, I understand how he perceived this. The first time was you doing that for him, you see. That's when it was okay.
1:32:06🔗DrewOn his terms for him. When you actually did it for one another cause she was turned, the other girl was turned on or something. No, that's not okay. That's not good.
1:32:14🔗AdamI think that's called a bruised ego. I think what we have here is severely bruised ego.
1:32:18🔗DrewYeah, I think that you just have 21 year old male stuff. A lot of testosterone creates a lot of aggression and anger and defensiveness and territoriality. A lot of that when you're in that age. He'll probably get over it if he's into you. Would you say?
1:32:36🔗DrewWell, again, we have to wrap up in a few minutes. We're going to take one more commercial break. But anything else you want to say about the upcoming tour or the CD, September 13th?
1:32:45🔗AdamJust really excited to be taking it on. So I look forward to seeing everyone out there. And thanks for all the support through the years. And I hope that everyone enjoys the record.
1:32:55🔗DrewGavin, I'll be right back after this. Tomorrow night, Nicole Sullivan from MADtv, a dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear friend of the show from way back. We haven't seen her in quite some time. And another dear, dear friend who's helped us out tonight, Gavin Rossdale. It's been a real pleasure. And thanks for having us, gracing us and joining us once again. It's interesting to hear your thoughts. And one call standing out of my mind tonight where the guy's saying, well, Gavin, I didn't know you were thoughtful and smart. It's like, that's what I think with Gavin, a thoughtful, smart gentleman. So here you all are. There he was. The band is Institute. The CD is Distort Yourself. You can get it on September 13th or you can download Bulletproof Skin. I don't know why I guys choke on the name of the song at iTunes immediately.