Sunday, July 1, 2001

1:01🔗 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13🔗 Voiceover Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew, board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. Big night tonight, Drew.

1:26🔗 Drew Really?

1:26🔗 Adam Yeah. Man show premiere.

1:28🔗 Drew Oh, big night.

1:29🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:29🔗 Drew Do you have to go to a party after this?

1:31🔗 Adam No.

1:32🔗 Drew Oh.

1:32🔗 Adam No, I don't. Well, the party.

1:34🔗 Drew They didn't invite you. I understand.

1:36🔗 Adam The party is going on right now because the show is premiering right now.

1:40🔗 Drew And as usual, as you and I have prepared many shows from this studio. Think about it. Other people have had parties.

1:48🔗 Adam How many what?

1:49🔗 Drew Other shows have premiered. Loveline premiered, The Man Show premiered, and you've been sitting here doing this show.

1:54🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:56🔗 Drew I wish we've ever premiered. You've been right here in the studio.

1:58🔗 Adam That's because I love the kids. But Anne, put it on The Man Show over there. Comedy Central.

2:05🔗 Drew Big premiere.

2:05🔗 Adam Big episode tonight. Big episode. And no, I'm not going to the party afterward because I'm getting picked up at 4.30 in the morning to go fishing with The Fridge.

2:18🔗 Drew The Fridge?

2:19🔗 Adam The Fridge. William Refrigerator Perry.

2:22🔗 Drew Oh, is this going to be a Man Show bit?

2:24🔗 Adam Yeah, of course.

2:25🔗 Drew Is he still alive?

2:27🔗 Adam I hope so. Otherwise, it's going to be a very depressing piece with The Fridge's corpse floating around the lake.

2:33🔗 Drew He was like 380 when he was playing football, right? Yeah. What's he doing?

2:37🔗 What's he rigging in that now?

2:38🔗 Adam He could have been 350, 360.

2:40🔗 Drew What's he pulling in now?

2:41🔗 Adam It's not like he's 6'8 though.

2:43🔗 I understand.

2:43🔗 Adam He's probably 6'1. Yeah. He's coming in about 4 and change, but he's big boned.

2:51🔗 Drew Big frame.

2:52🔗 Adam Hey, listen, say what you want about The Fridge, those of you who are-

2:56🔗 Drew He's probably a really nice guy.

2:57🔗 Adam Chicago Bear fans from the 80s will remember him and his dominance. But The Fridge, for a big fat guy, he got out of that three-point stance in a hurry.

3:09🔗 Drew He's a good ball player.

3:10🔗 Adam Oh, yeah. Yeah. Remember they put him in at the goal line?

3:13🔗 Drew Yeah.

3:13🔗 Adam They put this 380-pound guy in the backfield. That's right. They'd get on the one-yard line, the two-yard line.

3:20🔗 Drew Yeah.

3:20🔗 Adam They'd either hand it to him or let him lead. Right. With Peyton behind him.

3:25🔗 Yeah.

3:26🔗 Adam When that guy got out of that three-point stands and covered about six, seven yards to the goal line as quick as a wide out.

3:34🔗 Caller Yeah.

3:34🔗 Adam Did except for he weighed about 375. Yeah. When he hit that middle linebacker who was coming in at 235, it was just like I'd seen him score touchdowns where he didn't get hit hard enough at the line of scrimmage and ended up cartwheeling through the end zone. He actually launched himself through the back of the end zone. He'd mow down a couple of guys and still go cartwheeling out the back of the end zone. He was a big fat guy. I think he could dunk a basketball back then, too. He was a 380-pound, 75-pound dude who had some... He was quick. I mean, he was always out of shape. He was always a big fat guy. But he could jump. He could catch. He was quick out of the stands. He wasn't just some big fat guy they put in the middle.

4:27🔗 Drew Where are you going fishing?

4:29🔗 Adam We're going... We're going to Piru or something like that nearby.

4:35🔗 Drew Does he live out here?

4:36🔗 Adam No, he lives in Chicago still, I think. And by the way, I went to Vegas yesterday, slash today. Didn't go to bed.

4:46🔗 Drew Last night?

4:47🔗 Adam Yeah, what I did is I got a 7 p.m. flight out of Burbank on Saturday. And I got a 6.30 flight. Oh, yes, yawn for me. A 6.30 flight out of Vegas this morning. Ever do that?

5:04🔗 Drew The hell were you doing all night?

5:06🔗 Adam How dare you?

5:08🔗 Drew No, I've never done that.

5:08🔗 Adam Anderson's making a Coke reference there. Who did you go with? I went with the Man Show guys. Daniel, Jimmy, those guys. Well, you look at it this way. You go to Vegas, right?

5:18🔗 Drew Yeah.

5:19🔗 Adam You go with Daniel and Jimmy and his cousin, Sal.

5:22🔗 Drew They're not going to the hotel room ever.

5:23🔗 Adam You're not going to bed before 4 or 5 anyway. It's not like, oh, it's 1.45, I'm turning in. No, you're gambling and going to strip clubs, you're hanging out. You're going to about 4 or 5 o'clock anyway, right? Well, instead of go back to the hotel room with the cotton mouth and the eight other guys and try to crash out in some sort of bizarre sort of alternate slumber zone, why not just cut your loss and start heading for the airport?

5:49🔗 Drew You didn't do one of those bizarre five-hour strip joint...

5:52🔗 Adam No, no, not that long. But the point is, is I just started heading for the airport at 545.

5:57🔗 Drew That's good. That's good.

5:58🔗 Adam Yeah, it's not bad. Got home at 8 this morning. I was up 24 hours.

6:03🔗 Give me the pills, Skipper.

6:04🔗 Adam And I'll tell you what, while I was driving home from the airport, you know, watching the daybreak at about 745 this morning, I was thinking, thank God the fridge is coming over at 430 tomorrow morning. I'm really looking forward to that. All right, so again, Big Man Show premiere tonight. And let's... Thank you. Get back to the phones or at least do the phones and speak to Amanda at 16. Amanda?

6:32🔗 Caller Hey, what's up?

6:33🔗 Adam What's up?

6:34🔗 Caller Well, I got this friend named Jerry and somehow he got poison oak on his balls.

6:40🔗 Drew Nice.

6:41🔗 Caller And on his penis.

6:42🔗 Drew Beautiful.

6:43🔗 Caller And he was like announcing it. So I was like, oh, I'm going to call and find out what we can do about this because he thought that he should put an alcohol prep pad on.

6:49🔗 Drew No, no, no, no, no, no.

6:50🔗 Oh, yeah.

6:52🔗 Drew No, no, no, no, no.

6:52🔗 Caller We're all sitting around.

6:53🔗 Adam It's an alcohol prep pad. Like before you get a hold on.

6:56🔗 Drew Shut up.

6:56🔗 Adam Before you get a shot.

6:57🔗 Drew Yeah. It was like, I think it puts up the burns on something that burns. Nice. Yeah. Look, he probably has it elsewhere, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, of course. Well, he needs to see someone. There are steroid creams that can help with that. And sometimes steroid shots and pills that have to be used on top of that. Yeah, usually when it's on the genitals, which is not that uncommon. Because you know, guys, their hands go there a lot. You know what I mean? And so if it's on their hands, it's on their junk.

7:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

7:24🔗 Drew You know what I said about guys? People touch their face like 400 times a minute, but men...

7:29🔗 Adam Touch the junk.

7:30🔗 Drew More.

7:31🔗 Caller Yeah.

7:31🔗 Adam Hey, well, wait a minute. Is there a difference between poison oak and poison ivy?

7:35🔗 Drew It's all rust and it's all the same family of plant, but it's a little different. And we have poison oak out here in the Pacific. They have poison ivy out there.

7:42🔗 Adam Oh, we don't have poison ivy out here?

7:44🔗 Drew I listened to baseball night with my kids and they hit a ball into the poison ivy oak and I was looking at it, they're going, Jesus Christ, we have, in our backyard, loads of poison oak.

7:52🔗 Adam Really? Yeah. Yeah. You know, as an adult, there's just a handful of things that make it to that list that you don't think about anymore.

8:01🔗 Drew Oh yeah.

8:01🔗 Adam That include quicksand, poison oak, your name being put in alphabetical order. Yeah. Stuff that used to constantly run through your mind as a kid, not around anymore.

8:13🔗 Drew How many times now are you looking for a ball you've lost?

8:16🔗 Adam Never.

8:16🔗 Drew Okay. That's where the poison oak gets into the question.

8:19🔗 Adam I spent my entire childhood looking for a ball in ivy.

8:22🔗 Drew Yeah.

8:23🔗 Adam There you go. It was like this one ball, a lineal mile of ivy and I just looked in this huge ivy patch. That's how I spent my childhood looking for ivy.

8:36🔗 Drew That's a nice sort of metaphor for your whole childhood.

8:40🔗 Adam Yeah. Once in a while, I'd get lost and I've sent someone to look for me in the ivy. Where is he? He's in the ivy. Justine?

8:47🔗 Caller Hi.

8:47🔗 Adam Hi, you're 20.

8:48🔗 Drew What's up?

8:49🔗 Caller Congratulations on the Man Show premiere.

8:51🔗 Adam Thanks. Big premiere tonight.

8:52🔗 Caller Thank you very much.

8:55🔗 Caller Also, I do have a serious question, but first, can I just make a quick request from you guys? I'm a long-time listener and I used to make a best of tape in my own compilations, and somehow I taped over part of it, but I haven't heard the Dr. Drew rap in forever.

9:10🔗 Drew Not the boogie, but the rap?

9:12🔗 Adam The shuffle.

9:13🔗 Drew The shuffle, yeah.

9:14🔗 Adam Now wait, Justine, let's just make sure we're on the same page because we played the Dr. Drew boogie last week.

9:21🔗 Caller That's not the good one.

9:22🔗 Adam But you want to hear the Dr. Drew shuffle.

9:25🔗 Caller That's right.

9:26🔗 Adam Hmm, interesting.

9:28🔗 Caller It's better. That was the original, right?

9:30🔗 Drew Right, right, right.

9:33🔗 Adam It's old school.

9:34🔗 Yeah, that's good.

9:36🔗 Caller Will you play the whole thing later?

9:38🔗 Adam Yeah, all right. We'll play the whole thing later.

9:39🔗 Drew What about now? Just get it off with. Let's just get it out of the way, shall we? All right. All right, Gary.

9:47🔗 Adam Anderson, can we play the Dr. Drew shuffle?

9:50🔗 Drew There you go.

9:51🔗 Adam Get it over with.

9:51🔗 Pee on this stick.

9:54🔗 Makes me sick.

9:56🔗 Pee on this stick.

9:58🔗 Adam That horse is his high horse, which used to get out of the barn.

10:02🔗 Drew Here's what's going to happen.

10:04🔗 Caller Asshole. Stuff like this makes me sick.

10:10🔗 Drew You're fat.

10:10🔗 Adam Asshole.

10:11🔗 Drew You're fat. Can I say that? You're fat. You're overweight. I want to be dominated. You're gay. I want to be dominated. You're gay. When I was 19, I ate about four boiled peyote buttons, stayed up all night, but felt no effect.

10:24🔗 Caller It's called intimacy.

10:26🔗 Drew Can I say that? This is not acceptable. Can I say that? You're fat. Can I say that?

10:41🔗 Adam Yes, you can.

10:43🔗 Drew I'm a rapist.

10:44🔗 Adam Oh, Drew, please, the mic's on now.

10:45🔗 Drew That's all the classic drops in it. I didn't realize that.

10:47🔗 Adam Yeah.

10:47🔗 Drew That you're gay and you're fat and all. Sure. We played the boogie last week, and I realized I'd lost my righteous indignation.

10:53🔗 Adam Yeah.

10:54🔗 Drew And I'm trying to regain that.

10:55🔗 Adam Yeah.

10:55🔗 Drew I really am.

10:56🔗 Adam All right. Let's see if we can find it now. Justine, what's your question?

10:59🔗 Caller Thank you.

11:00🔗 Adam OK.

11:00🔗 Caller My question is this.

11:01🔗 Drew By the way, thanks for talking over that. She specifically wanted to tape it as nice as you.

11:06🔗 Adam I did want to explain and felt compelled to explain what all the horse sounds were because it's a little bit of a non-secret.

11:12🔗 Drew Well, that and it's also been translated. It's become your high horse. You notice that?

11:18🔗 Adam My high horse?

11:19🔗 Drew Anderson, am I right on that? Yeah.

11:21🔗 Adam Yeah, right. Barely. But it used to be Drew's high horse, which was out of the barn. All right, Justine, go ahead, babe.

11:27🔗 Caller Okay, so I have this pattern with boyfriends where, first of all, I always have a boyfriend. But I've only had three long-term serious relationships since 11th grade with no breaks in between. They actually overlap. And I don't know, I get attached to these guys emotionally. And like right now, I love my boyfriend very much, but I lose interest sexually.

11:52🔗 Drew Do you feel, this is like one of those situations that Woody Allen describes where you never want to be a member of a club that have you as a member, that somehow a guy that is sort of succumbs to your overtures is somehow spoiled?

12:04🔗 Caller No, I don't think it's that. It's just, it's just not as exciting.

12:08🔗 Drew So you're into the longing phase. How about a guy that never lets you, never succumbs to your overtures? Would that be like somebody you just could not get out of your cross-arrows?

12:18🔗 Caller Um, I don't really go for that as much. Usually I like the flirtation, I like the taste, and then getting it the first time, that's exciting. And then that's it. And then I...

12:28🔗 Drew You're over.

12:29🔗 Adam Well, what if within the relationship, the guy constantly kept you off balance?

12:36🔗 Caller Yeah.

12:36🔗 Adam So that that phase carried out through the relationship. You never quite knew if he was into you, you're not sure how you stood. Good one day, bad the next.

12:46🔗 Caller Yeah. In a way, that's true, because I get really, really jealous when I don't need to, but that sort of keeps it exciting.

12:54🔗 Drew It's all bad, right? It's all bad. Okay?

12:57🔗 Caller Yeah.

12:57🔗 Drew It's all ways to avoid intimacy. It's all ways to keep it in that state. Whatever... However you learned to be you, somebody was never giving you what you needed growing up. You know, you're that person who never gets from dad what she needed, basically, or dad died or left or something.

13:13🔗 Caller Right.

13:14🔗 Drew What did he do?

13:17🔗 Caller He's not physically abusive, but just very verbally abusive, very loud, yells and screams all the time, very negative person.

13:26🔗 Drew Right. Do you tend to go for negative guys or just guys that you...

13:29🔗 Caller No. The guys are the complete opposite.

13:31🔗 Drew But have you ever gone for... That's why it doesn't last.

13:32🔗 Caller Yeah.

13:32🔗 Drew That's why it doesn't last. If you went for a real negative guy, you'd probably... That's the kind of guy Adam was describing, a guy that is not available to you, who's always sort of quasi-abusive to you.

13:42🔗 Caller Right. But I sort of... I mean, I end up with guys that do it on me and are always there and go way out of their way to do everything.

13:50🔗 Drew Well, all things being equal, you've made the better of the two choices. But it's all still about avoiding intimacy. I will recommend a book to you that you can read that talks about where this comes from. It's called...

13:58🔗 Adam Hop On Pop.

13:59🔗 Drew Hop On Pop is one option. The other is a book by Ethel Person by the name of Dreams of Love and Fateful Encounters. Dreams of Love and Fateful Encounters. You can get it on Amazon. And if that is too complex, Hop On Pop does the trick too.

14:11🔗 Adam Is there some sort of law that women could not be named Ethel after 1955?

14:17🔗 Drew Or Gertrude. Or Gertrude. Ethel and Gertrude are gone.

14:21🔗 Adam Let me tell you. I'd take an Ethel over Brittany. Drew, you know the young kids' names. What are they now?

14:28🔗 Drew Jennifer, Brittany, Amy.

14:30🔗 Adam Oh, really? But Amy and Jennifer are old.

14:32🔗 Drew Oh, you mean the real young. The real young. You mean the little kids?

14:34🔗 Adam Yeah.

14:35🔗 Drew Oh, sheesh.

14:37🔗 Adam They must be naming them after whatever pop stars in vogue now, right?

14:41🔗 Drew Yeah, a lot of Brittany's. A lot of Brittany's. A lot of... Right.

14:46🔗 Adam You know what I don't like? I don't like it when they name them after writers or playwrights or like Beckett names like that. I just want to punch the parents, you pretentious a-holes. I think it's... Thank you. There's my high horse. I think it was...

15:05🔗 Drew There's my righteous indignation.

15:06🔗 Adam No. What's her name? Melissa Atherich.

15:11🔗 Drew What's her name for daughters?

15:12🔗 Adam Her kid's name. Her son's name is Beckett. It always bothers me when people do that. Holden. You know those kind of names? It bothers them to me. I really like them to just pick five or six names. They're not racehorses. Stop getting so creative. And what happened with it? How come racehorses always have bizarre names, by the way? No horse just named Stu or Bob or anything. It's always crazy stuff. Jeff?

15:39🔗 Yeah.

15:40🔗 Adam You're 20?

15:40🔗 Caller Yeah.

15:41🔗 Adam What's up?

15:42🔗 Caller Hey, I work at a porn store. And a lot of times, guys bring back their videos, all covered in lube and...

15:48🔗 Drew Oh, this is good times.

15:50🔗 Adam No, they don't.

15:51🔗 Caller What?

15:51🔗 Adam Hold on. That's ridiculous.

15:52🔗 I used to work at a video store every single time.

15:54🔗 Adam Anderson? Anderson worked at a video store?

15:57🔗 For like two years. They always come back with slime.

16:00🔗 Drew Oh my God. Oh my God.

16:03🔗 Adam What kind of video store did you work at?

16:04🔗 Like a little mall in Poplis.

16:06🔗 Adam But they would rent... They'd have the porn section, right? Yeah. And... And really, would there really be slime on those things?

16:13🔗 Yeah, not all of them, but there'd be a lot that would. And we'd actually... We found the guy one time, and we said, hey, man, don't rent from here anymore because you're returning them with this stuff all over.

16:20🔗 Adam Oh, that must have been uncomfortable.

16:22🔗 Drew Did he look like Adam?

16:23🔗 He was a big fat guy.

16:25🔗 Adam Jesus Christ.

16:26🔗 But most of the money those places make is in porn, as you know, Adam.

16:29🔗 Adam Oh, yeah. How dare you. What would they do? Does he transport them in the creases of his fat, or was it... It was just he popped the thing out with lube still on his hand?

16:40🔗 Drew You wouldn't realize.

16:41🔗 He'd give it to us in a little case, and we'd open the case, and there'd be this stuff from Aliens. You remember that stuff? It was connected to it, and you'd open it up, and it would be like a swarm of strings. I swear to God.

16:51🔗 Adam Well, look, that's intentional at that point.

16:55🔗 I don't know, I think he was just a really fat, sloppy guy that didn't think about himself.

16:58🔗 Drew Well, how about your partner, your clients, Jeff? What kind of thing are they doing?

17:02🔗 Caller Well, for example, we had one guy return a video the other night, and it had some lube on it or something, and I checked his videos in, and I had an itch on my eye, actually, in the corner of my eye, and I didn't touch my eye, but I ran in the bathroom, washed my hands real good, and then took like a paper towel and sort of itched the inside of my eye. I mean, is that anything really to worry about? I mean, can you catch anything?

17:33🔗 Adam Well, first thing, these guys have no diseases. They're constantly at home beating off. They're not out catching things.

17:41🔗 Caller Well, this guy, this particular guy, returned some gay videos. And I know, I don't know if...

17:48🔗 Drew Relax, relax.

17:49🔗 Caller Oh, man.

17:51🔗 Adam What was it called?

17:52🔗 Caller I don't remember. I don't know.

17:53🔗 Adam Come on.

17:54🔗 Caller I don't have a clue.

17:56🔗 Adam No clue, really?

17:57🔗 Drew I imagine you wouldn't know.

17:59🔗 Adam You had to restock the thing, didn't you?

18:01🔗 Caller We just go by the number.

18:02🔗 Adam Oh, I see.

18:03🔗 Caller There's numbers on all the videos.

18:04🔗 Adam Right.

18:05🔗 Caller Put it back in order.

18:06🔗 Drew If this is a bogus call, very creative answer.

18:08🔗 Adam No, no. He's right.

18:10🔗 Drew We totally buy it.

18:11🔗 Adam I buy it. No, smart. But within the gay section, are there specialty sections?

18:19🔗 Caller There's like the jailhouse leather gay. Then there's the little pretty 18-year-old gay stuff, and then there's the big burly black dudes, and there are sort of subsections.

18:34🔗 Adam Right. They have like oral gay and cornhole gay.

18:40🔗 Caller Yeah. Solo.

18:41🔗 Adam Solo? This guy's beating off?

18:44🔗 Caller Yeah.

18:44🔗 Adam I did some gay porn in the late 70s. Yeah, but never solo. You know, how ironic is it that you're just sitting there in front of a TV and there's a guy beating off and you're just beating off? Like, you might as well just get a mirror, throw away the TV set.

18:57🔗 Drew Yeah, but you've watched women do that, right, in your little collection.

19:01🔗 Adam I would not rent the movie that had exclusively that in it. It seemed like it was missing some elements. Right. You know, like a big budget movie with no score to it or something, or subtitles. You know, it would be missing something for me. Jeff, you're fine. Why don't you get some of that Curel stuff?

19:21🔗 Drew Yeah, the alcohol-based hand cleaner.

19:23🔗 Adam Oh, yeah.

19:23🔗 Drew All right.

19:24🔗 Caller So there's really nothing to worry about then?

19:27🔗 Drew Well, yes, wash your hands carefully. That's right. And don't put them up to mucosal surfaces like your eyes or your mouth, just like you did.

19:33🔗 Adam You're fine. You know, it's weird. If you put something in the VCR and you're beating off and you finish, you don't head right for the VCR, do you?

19:43🔗 Drew I guess some people aren't just sort of grab it and put it back in the case or something. You know what I mean?

19:47🔗 Adam Yeah, but then you go mop up and, you know, you do it the next morning.

19:51🔗 Drew I don't know. Listen, you know how bizarre people are, right? Okay. Think about this. Think about our cause.

19:57🔗 Adam I can no longer rent porn now that people recognize me now it's ruined.

20:02🔗 Drew Oh, really?

20:03🔗 Adam I can't do it. Hey, Adam, what are you... They know. People know who I am now. It's humiliating.

20:11🔗 Drew And it wasn't before?

20:12🔗 Adam That's what I'm talking about, beating off all night on a radio show, but it's still embarrassing. No, I had a certain amount of anonymity.

20:18🔗 Drew What could you rent that doesn't already exist in your bunker?

20:21🔗 Adam Well, that's another good point. All right. Hey, is the man show on over there? Are we doing it in a commercial? What do we got going here? It's on there?

20:31🔗 Yeah, you're standing next to Jimmy with a funny face.

20:34🔗 Adam All right. What are we in a clinic? Where are we?

20:39🔗 No, it's like a pink flashing background.

20:42🔗 Adam Pink flashing background?

20:43🔗 Just go to break. Come in. Come on.

20:45🔗 Adam We'll take a little break. I'm going to go watch the premiere of the man show. We'll be right back.

20:53🔗 Caller Um, back in a minute.

20:56🔗 Caller Hey, Drew.

21:00🔗 Adam Hey, it's Loveline, everybody. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Let's hop back on the phones. Big Man Show premiere tonight, by the way. Yeah. Comedy Central. Yeah.

21:15🔗 Drew I'm not sure anybody under 18 ought to be watching that.

21:18🔗 Adam Really?

21:19🔗 Drew No.

21:19🔗 Adam You just saw Segment True.

21:20🔗 Drew I'm over 18.

21:22🔗 Adam Are you? All right. Thank you. Brian?

21:26🔗 Drew Yeah.

21:26🔗 Adam You're 22?

21:27🔗 Drew Am I just saying that? A stampede of 17-year-old is just a friend of the TV.

21:31🔗 Adam Great. Keep talking. What's up, Brian?

21:33🔗 Caller I got a question for Dr. Drew.

21:35🔗 Drew Yeah.

21:35🔗 Caller I was just wondering if there was any new medicines for LSD left over side effects?

21:42🔗 Drew Well, it depends what you're having. Are you talking about the mood disturbances, panic?

21:48🔗 Caller Yeah. Kind of paranoia, anxiety.

21:50🔗 Drew Yeah. There is. Do you feel still kind of locked into a high a little bit? Like you never came down from a little bit of a?

21:58🔗 Caller Well, yeah.

21:59🔗 Caller Maybe a little bit.

22:00🔗 Drew But how long have you been feeling like this?

22:03🔗 Caller Like three years.

22:05🔗 Drew Has it been getting better over that three years or worse?

22:07🔗 Caller Yeah, but it's pretty slow.

22:09🔗 Drew Getting better over the three years? Yeah. Yeah, there are. Absolutely. You need to go to a doctor who has some experience in treating this.

22:16🔗 Caller But yeah, I went to a doctor and he acted like he didn't know what I was talking about.

22:20🔗 Drew Was it a psychiatrist?

22:21🔗 Caller Yeah. I told him what it was. He was like, yeah, that acid should have been under your system in three days.

22:25🔗 Drew No, no, no. There are chronic neurologic syndromes from LSD. I've seen a number of different syndromes. What you have is something called the locked in syndrome, which is rather common. It's when you use a fair amount of acid and all of a sudden, you feel like you'd never really quite come down from it. Then you start feeling paranoid, then you get panicky, and then you get depressed.

22:44🔗 Adam How much did he do?

22:46🔗 Caller Quite a bit. I don't know, maybe like 100.

22:49🔗 Adam Oh, yeah.

22:49🔗 Caller Over a summer and a half.

22:51🔗 Drew Many of the antidepressant medications will work for this. You need to see a psychiatrist who has some background in what's called addiction medicine or addiction psychiatry. They should know a little bit about this. There's a lot of stuff that can help with this, so definitely take advantage of that because it is a miserable disabling condition if you're not careful.

23:07🔗 Adam Let me give one of my famous automotive analogies and how it would pertain to the brain. This is true with anything in life, really anything. This is what acid is. What do you expect, by the way? You're out joy riding your brain a hundred times. Picture your car. Now, it's fun to head out to an open field and just do donuts in your car. It's fun to get it going 60, grab the emergency brake and pull a starskiing hutch maneuver. I mean, it's fun to catch a little air when you're going over the train tracks and stuff once in a while. And I used to like, when it would rain, I'd take the car, go to the Gelson's parking lot and do some donuts and stuff. It's all great. The problem is, is your car wears out a little faster. You can screw things up. You might get lucky and take it out a couple of times and have no problems. Or you may catch a rut or something and tweak the whole A-frame. Do you know what I'm saying?

24:08🔗 Drew And there's a certain amount of inevitability in that, in the brain.

24:11🔗 Adam The more you take it out, the more, the higher the chances you're going to tweak it. But here's what I'm saying about your brain, kiddies. I like to go out and take my brain for a spin every once in a while. Just like I like to take my car for a little hot rod every once in a while. But you do it all the time and you do it irresponsibly and you do it crazy and you're going to break it. And the difference between the car and your brain is, you know, the car you can at least sell and get a new one. Brain, that's it. I mean, what he did with his brain was he took it out and did donuts in the mud with it a hundred times. And now he's wondering why the thing pulls a little to the right.

24:48🔗 Drew Yeah, people don't understand that their brain is them. They don't understand that. It's like the brain is like some abstract organ that affects their sort of coordination or something. No, this is who this is you, your experience of self reality, mood, everything you feel can be profoundly distorted.

25:06🔗 Adam Crystal.

25:07🔗 Caller Hi.

25:08🔗 Adam You're 16. What's up?

25:09🔗 Caller Yeah. Okay. I was giving my boyfriend a hand job. I pulled on the foreskin a little because he's not circumcised and he said it hurt.

25:18🔗 Adam Yeah.

25:18🔗 Caller And I don't think anything of it. But then later I was on three way with my boyfriend and my friend Chris and both Chris and my boyfriend aren't circumcised. But Chris said he could pull his foreskin all the way back and my boyfriend can maybe do it so that head's kind of poking out before it starts to hurt a lot.

25:36🔗 Drew Right. So he has some narrowing, some stenosis of the foreskin. That's one of the reasons that getting a circumcision is a good idea because that narrowing can happen. And then when you pull it through, like you did kind of vigorously, it tears and then it narrows even more. And then pretty soon you can't get the head out at all.

25:52🔗 Adam You guys, you can't just talk about Grad night or something. You have two guys. You guys talk about the pre-pews for an hour on the phone. And by the way, Drew, get used to this. This is where you're heading.

26:05🔗 Drew With my kids?

26:06🔗 Adam Oh, yes. A lot of foreskin talk late night on the phone. Three-way, by the way.

26:13🔗 Caller Three-way, seven-way.

26:14🔗 Adam All right.

26:15🔗 Caller So.

26:15🔗 Drew Good times.

26:16🔗 Adam Well.

26:16🔗 Caller What do we do?

26:17🔗 Adam Okay. I think. I know that foreskin can be trained a little bit, moved around a little bit. I mean, just like when they put those barrels in the guy's earlobes and, you know, in a year they get it up, they get it up to, you know, two-inch piece of sewer pipe in there. They can't, he, work with it a little bit.

26:37🔗 Drew They can stretch and work on it, but sometimes that causes more stricturing.

26:41🔗 Adam Really?

26:41🔗 Drew More narrowing.

26:42🔗 Adam Tell me it's got to work with it a little.

26:43🔗 Drew If it really bugs him, get a circumcision.

26:45🔗 Adam Yeah, but it might as well work with it a little bit first. And Drew, is there anything you can put on it that would help make it more supple?

26:54🔗 Drew Not that I'm aware of.

26:56🔗 Adam But could it hurt like vitamin E?

26:58🔗 Drew It couldn't hurt.

26:59🔗 Adam Or something like that?

27:00🔗 Drew Couldn't hurt.

27:01🔗 Adam Tell them that, you know, you can do a good way to get some vitamin E is just grab that capsule and just bite the tip of it off and it's real nice. Smells like fish, but it's nice. Yeah, don't put anything on you. It's going to confuse them. But put a little on there and let them work it out. Stretch it out. Right, Drew?

27:21🔗 Drew Yeah.

27:21🔗 Adam All right. Good times.

27:22🔗 Drew Get some PVC pipe and-

27:23🔗 Adam That's right.

27:25🔗 Caller Let me try something.

27:27🔗 Adam All right. James?

27:30🔗 Yeah.

27:30🔗 Adam You're 16?

27:31🔗 Caller Hi, guys.

27:32🔗 Adam What's up?

27:33🔗 Caller First of all, I want to say congratulations on The Man Show. The governor of Michigan watches The Man Show.

27:40🔗 Adam He does?

27:40🔗 Drew Of Michigan?

27:41🔗 Adam Why?

27:42🔗 Caller He was on a radio show the other day or something.

27:44🔗 Drew He in Minnesota?

27:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

27:46🔗 Drew Not Michigan.

27:47🔗 Best show on television.

27:48🔗 Caller There you go. There we go. He says it.

27:51🔗 Caller Any time he wants to go for some mindless television, he turns on The Man Show.

27:56🔗 Drew Thank you, Jesse Ventura.

27:57🔗 Adam Yeah. That's Jesse Ventura.

27:59🔗 Caller Remember him?

28:01🔗 Drew He doesn't remember him.

28:02🔗 Caller Go ahead.

28:03🔗 Adam That's stoned to our collars. First off, is there a very stoned Anderson? Is there a more well-known or popular governor than Governor Jesse Ventura?

28:13🔗 Drew Yeah, but he's been governor for like, he was in wrestling like four years ago, five years ago, right? He's been governor for two, three years.

28:21🔗 Adam But the point-

28:22🔗 Drew He was, this kid was like probably 11 when he was in wrestling.

28:25🔗 Adam The point is, is there's no more popular governor in the United States or maybe in the world if anyone's in the United States.

28:31🔗 Drew I don't know if popular or controversial.

28:32🔗 Adam Well, I mean, I mean popular and I should say well-known governor. And especially to a 16-year-old, he got the state screwed up and you don't got his name right. But all right, James, go ahead.

28:43🔗 Caller I'm sorry.

28:43🔗 Adam That's all right.

28:44🔗 Caller Well, I'm in counseling right now and the insurance company is only going to pay for a couple more visits and my therapist really wants me to like tell my mom what's going on. And I don't know how to do that without-

29:01🔗 Adam What is going on?

29:02🔗 Caller I'm a paedophile.

29:04🔗 Drew Somebody sexually abused you when you were a kid?

29:06🔗 Caller Yeah.

29:07🔗 Adam Who did that? My aunt.

29:09🔗 Drew Does your mom know about this?

29:11🔗 Adam No.

29:11🔗 Drew Maybe that's what you ought to tell her about.

29:13🔗 Adam Her sister?

29:15🔗 Caller No, my dad's sister. My mom divorced him and that whole side of family is just- I haven't talked to anyone in like eight years.

29:24🔗 Adam How old were you when this happened?

29:26🔗 Caller Probably like six.

29:28🔗 Drew How old was she?

29:29🔗 Caller My mom or the aunt?

29:30🔗 Adam The aunt.

29:31🔗 Caller I don't know.

29:32🔗 Drew Was she an adult or the older kid?

29:33🔗 Caller Forty or something like that.

29:35🔗 Adam I don't remember. Great. Well, rest assured, something happened to her in a huge way. I mean, if you ever feel bad, like if you ever have anger toward her or you ever feel like she didn't get her come up in her day in court or you never got retribution, believe me.

29:52🔗 Drew She's living in it.

29:53🔗 Adam She's living in it. Her daddy did something horrible to her for a long time, much worse than what she did to you, I would bet. How long did this go on?

30:03🔗 Caller Couple months, like four or five.

30:06🔗 Adam Now you're into young girls, right?

30:09🔗 Caller Yeah.

30:10🔗 Adam Okay. Have you acted on that?

30:12🔗 Drew Good.

30:13🔗 Adam No.

30:13🔗 Drew Good, man. Why do they want you to tell the mom?

30:19🔗 Caller I don't know. She thinks that I should tell my mom.

30:23🔗 Drew Well, I think you ought to follow your therapist's instructions, first of all. Okay? I really do. Secondly, I'm disturbed that the insurance company, which is this is unfortunately not an uncommon story when you have a very, very serious problem, they won't cover the necessary treatment. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. I mean, here's somebody that the treatment for which could save not just his hide, but maybe hundreds of others. You know what I'm saying?

30:46🔗 Adam Right.

30:46🔗 Drew But no, I think the insurance companies ought to be held accountable for that.

30:50🔗 Adam Well, and then meanwhile, the San Francisco wants some state to pay for the bus driver to get a sex change.

30:58🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

31:00🔗 Adam Strange, isn't it?

31:01🔗 Drew No.

31:01🔗 Adam No?

31:03🔗 Drew Strange is not the word I'm thinking.

31:05🔗 Adam God damn attorneys, right, Drew? Ruining the world.

31:08🔗 Drew No. I just think the laws aren't in place to protect people, and more F than strange.

31:14🔗 Adam Right.

31:15🔗 Drew You know what I'm saying? And so James, you know, I'm glad you're in treatment. For treatment to work, you got to follow directions. Follow directions.

31:24🔗 Adam All right. Natalie? You're 17? What's up, princess?

31:29🔗 Caller Not much.

31:31🔗 Caller I've had an eye irritation for about four days, five days now, and I don't think it's pink eye because I called a pharmacist, and she said my symptoms weren't pink eye, and...

31:43🔗 Drew Well, first of all, pink eye just means your eye is red.

31:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

31:47🔗 Drew That's all it means.

31:47🔗 Caller Oh, I thought it was like...

31:49🔗 Drew Pink eye can mean a hundred different things.

31:51🔗 Caller Okay.

31:52🔗 Drew So was your eye red?

31:54🔗 Caller Yes.

31:54🔗 Drew Oh, your eye was pink. There you go.

31:56🔗 Adam Well, yeah, but there's that... There's many things that cause them. When you see kids at school with it.

32:02🔗 Drew They're usually talking about conjunctivitis, but people are not... They don't know what they're seeing necessarily. So go ahead. What's the deal?

32:09🔗 Caller Well, I thought it was maybe allergies, but at first I was using marine tears and now I'm using this stuff called Nafcon-A. But it's starting to help, but I just didn't know if I was taking too much of it or if it's addictive or if...

32:23🔗 Drew Not addictive, but you need a diagnosis. You need somebody to look at this and find out what's going on.

32:28🔗 Caller And you go to a doctor or something?

32:29🔗 Drew Yeah. Both eyes affected?

32:31🔗 Caller Yeah.

32:32🔗 Caller Well, I thought it was just allergies.

32:33🔗 Drew Let's ask them to answer the questions. Both eyes affected?

32:36🔗 Caller Yes.

32:36🔗 Caller Equally?

32:38🔗 Caller Well, it's mainly on my left one.

32:40🔗 Caller It just really depends on the day.

32:42🔗 Drew And is it crust of the morning? Can't open your eyes, that kind of thing?

32:45🔗 Caller It has been, but not in the past day or two.

32:47🔗 Drew It could well be allergies, but you need a diagnosis. And there are steroid drops and things they can use that will make it better much quicker. And AvCon is a good product, by the way.

32:54🔗 Adam Who the hell knows their pharmacist at 17? I didn't know what a pharmacist was. I didn't, first pharmacist I ever saw, I was like 31.

33:04🔗 Drew A pharmacist shouldn't be making diagnostic, a physician shouldn't be making diagnosis over the phone. So, it's like, hmm, interesting.

33:13🔗 Adam Mike?

33:14🔗 Yeah.

33:14🔗 Adam You're 30?

33:15🔗 Caller Yeah, yeah.

33:16🔗 Adam What's up?

33:16🔗 Caller Listen, I got two poor questions. Sure. I was pretty serious. I'm a kid's party entertainer on the weekend.

33:22🔗 Adam Oh, party pals.

33:24🔗 Drew I just, we just spent an afternoon with Elmo yesterday. And you know, in like 115 degree heat and that guy in that damn outfit. I thought I was going to resuscitate him.

33:31🔗 Adam Believe me, the guy, and the guy made 55 bucks for the whole afternoon and got chewed out because he didn't spray enough Lysol in Elmo's head before he dropped it off.

33:41🔗 Drew And there's always, you know, there's always two kids that want to like abuse Elmo. You know what I mean?

33:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

33:46🔗 Drew They want to make fun of everything he says and screw up everything he's trying to do.

33:50🔗 Caller Yeah.

33:50🔗 Adam Yeah, I know.

33:51🔗 Caller It's great.

33:52🔗 Adam So I'm sorry. What's up?

33:54🔗 Caller Yeah, listen. So listen, I'm partying. You know, I'm entertaining the party and stuff.

33:59🔗 Drew What's the character you play?

34:01🔗 Caller I play Spider-Man.

34:02🔗 Adam Spider-Man. You do a lot of different ones too, right?

34:05🔗 Drew You do Wolverine? Yeah?

34:07🔗 Caller Yeah, they're actually, what do you call it?

34:08🔗 Adam Oh yeah, they keep changing. Yeah, see, I was still like with the Ninja Turtles and stuff.

34:13🔗 Drew Now this is Wolverine and Spider-Man.

34:14🔗 Adam You have to put your head on while you're driving down the street though, right?

34:18🔗 Drew No, no. It's all the stocking over his head. It's all the Marvel comic guys, right?

34:21🔗 Adam No, I'm saying though, when you're Elmo, you can't come traipsing up the walkway of the house with your head under your arm. You got to put the goddamn smoking. You got to put the head on as you come down the sidewalk because the kids are going to... That's right. You park down the street, then you put your stupid head on and you walk down the street.

34:39🔗 Drew You almost did this, didn't you?

34:40🔗 Adam I was this close to being a party pal.

34:41🔗 All right.

34:43🔗 Adam All right, so anyway.

34:44🔗 Caller All right, so to kind of shorten the story, what I ended up finding out that it was an autistic child that one of the children I was working with, not the person whose birthday it was, but just the younger sister. She's about four years old. The whole time during the party, and sure, I guess I don't have a lot of experience with autistic children, and that's what I'm calling. The whole time during the party, she was very sexual in nature. What I mean by that is, I'll give you-

35:16🔗 Drew Was she masturbating or something?

35:17🔗 Caller I'll create examples.

35:18🔗 Drew Hey, was she masturbating or something?

35:20🔗 Caller No.

35:21🔗 Drew Okay.

35:21🔗 Caller It was all toward me. It was- And to a certain extent, I could understand a little because I'm a comic character and everything like that, but it got scary. I mean, it got to the point that these are the things she was doing. She would hug my leg, she would kiss my hand during some period of time, I guess, while we were- I can't remember what it was, but with the focus was somewhere else. She went up to me, she grabbed my finger, and she squeezed it, and she started rubbing it.

35:48🔗 Drew You interpreted this as sexual. No, no, no.

35:51🔗 Caller Okay, no, no. Yeah. She said, I love you. There's all these things.

35:56🔗 Adam Yeah.

35:56🔗 Caller Staring at my eyes, rubbing my Spider-Man costume up and down.

36:02🔗 Adam Okay. Hey, Mike.

36:04🔗 Caller Yeah.

36:04🔗 Adam Do you put a couple of tube socks down the front of that thing before you hit the party?

36:09🔗 Caller What's that?

36:11🔗 Adam The Spider-Man outfits, a tight outfit, right?

36:13🔗 Caller Yeah.

36:14🔗 Adam I'll put a couple of tube socks down the front there. All right, man. Yeah. I know. I'm serious. Just so they don't see the outline of your penis. You ever see that weird thing where you see the guy's penis showing through his thing? Better just have a nice bulge. All right. Well, what about, okay. All right. I'm putting one home because it's a crazy actor.

36:30🔗 Drew Well, autistic and problems, there are neurologic problems like that. Kids are de-repressed. They can be very sexual. They don't have impulse control.

36:38🔗 Adam Being retarded is like just being drunk.

36:40🔗 Drew Yeah. They will masturbate and do various things. But this doesn't even sound like that. This sounds more like someone who's just sort of physical and is inappropriate. But I wouldn't just, you know, her behavior needs containment as many autistic kids' behavior does.

36:55🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, I mean, if you don't, I mean, okay, this may sound harsh, but animals, animals don't care. They see another animal. They start sniffing the other one's butt.

37:06🔗 Drew What do dogs come up and do to your leg?

37:08🔗 Adam Start humping your leg. They're licking their balls. They're sniffing the other animal's butt.

37:11🔗 Drew That's right.

37:12🔗 Adam They don't care who's walking it, who's around, anything like that.

37:15🔗 Drew Same drill.

37:15🔗 Adam Their brain is not quite as developed. That's what happens. Your brain gets more developed. You start to have these impulses like, hey, look at that great looking chicken. I'm going to grab a handful of boob and contain that. Then you contain it or then you'll get drunk and actually do it.

37:30🔗 Drew Or as you're going to find out soon, you hit like 80, 85, you start just doing that stuff.

37:34🔗 Adam We start going, screw it.

37:35🔗 Drew Yeah. Well, you lose that part of your brain that's responsible for screening impulses.

37:40🔗 Adam Oh, really?

37:40🔗 Drew Yeah. As you age, that part-

37:41🔗 Adam I think it's just convenience.

37:42🔗 Drew No, no, no.

37:42🔗 Adam I'm going to be dead.

37:43🔗 Drew No, no. As you age, that part drops out. You think, hey, I want to do that? That's what I do.

37:47🔗 Adam But my take would be like, look, I'll grab a boob, but I'll be dead before the trial's over. I'm not going to do any real time. So being autistic, it's like there's elements of that. You have to be trained. Oh, boy. Listen, I don't want to argue with Mike. I'm sure there was a-

38:06🔗 Caller No, no.

38:06🔗 Drew It's all right. He just wants to know information.

38:08🔗 Adam But I'm sure she was enamored with him and thought he was Spider-Man and felt affection for him.

38:13🔗 Caller Yeah.

38:13🔗 Adam Okay. He got a little crazy with it, though. He took his party panel thing very seriously to him. I could back them. Mike?

38:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

38:25🔗 Adam How much does that pay?

38:26🔗 Caller It pays just like you were talking about. Whatever. With tip, I'm between 30 and 50.

38:32🔗 Adam How's it- What's going on with the tip, by the way?

38:36🔗 Caller Well, sometimes they're not tipping.

38:37🔗 Adam They don't tip all the time, right?

38:39🔗 Caller No.

38:40🔗 Caller Sometimes they can be pretty rough.

38:43🔗 Adam And now, you go pick up the outfit and then you have like a couple of days to drop it off or something?

38:48🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Yeah?

38:50🔗 Adam All right. How's the acting going?

38:52🔗 Caller How's the acting going? It's coming around. It's coming around. I mean, I do a Shakespeare show and yeah, I'm doing the workshops, you know, the quote, casting director workshops and things like that.

39:02🔗 Adam All right. Hey, do me a favor. Next time you see any of those casting directors, tell them that Adam Corolla said to kiss his ass. All right.

39:12🔗 Caller Hey, listen, I have a question for that question.

39:13🔗 Drew Yeah, go ahead.

39:14🔗 Caller Yeah, yeah, listen, but if, okay, so it's fine. So I over blew what was going on and then, you know, just understand what I was just saying. But if there should happen, if there should happen to be a situation where I recognize, not that I would even have the authority to recognize, but it should have a sense that there's something up with the child that seems strange or seems like something that would be of sexual nature that someone else is messing with them.

39:40🔗 Drew No, I think you have to see something explicit. And if you do, you call Child Protective Services. But to have a hunch, I don't think you're going to get very far with that.

39:50🔗 Adam Well, you find out it's the uncle, you shoot a blast of web at him, you tie him to his chair and then...

39:57🔗 Drew Make him confess.

39:58🔗 Adam You wait for Commissioner Gordon. Mayor somebody, or the editor at the newspaper. Didn't Spider-Man work at a newspaper, too? He did? What a ripoff from Batman. I mean Superman. Sorry, didn't anyone make a beef about that? I mean, isn't there some sort of copyright infringement or something there? When that was originally Pitt, I got this idea for this guy, he's a superhero, he works at a newspaper. How come no one raised their hand and went, hey, wait a minute.

40:32🔗 Drew We got one of those.

40:32🔗 Adam Yeah, you can't do that. It's a ripoff. Look at the X show. All right. Oh, look at the X show. Well, good point, Erisn.

40:39🔗 Drew Yeah, they came out first, so I managed to rip that off.

40:41🔗 Adam Yeah, I'd like to look at the X show, but not on. Funny how that works. Something unbelievable about that man format, but somehow it didn't work on the X show.

40:51🔗 Drew Shocking.

40:52🔗 Adam Shocking. Oh well, we'll be back.

40:57🔗 Caller Love Line, Adam Carolla, and Dr. Drew.

41:04🔗 Adam Hey, everybody. It's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Let's talk to this guy who's got the blood in the seam. It's been an hour. The guy's been on hold. Dustin?

41:20🔗 Caller Hello?

41:21🔗 Adam Hey, you're 16.

41:22🔗 Caller Yeah, dude.

41:23🔗 Drew What's up?

41:24🔗 Caller What's up, Adam?

41:25🔗 Drew Dude.

41:25🔗 Adam What's up?

41:27🔗 Caller Okay, I got a problem, man.

41:30🔗 Adam Turn the...

41:31🔗 Caller Hello?

41:32🔗 Adam You got blood in your semen?

41:34🔗 Caller Yeah.

41:34🔗 Drew Every time you masturbate?

41:36🔗 Caller No, just like sometimes.

41:38🔗 Drew How many times has this happened?

41:40🔗 Caller Like three or four.

41:42🔗 Drew Three or four times. Have you had anybody? Yeah, I know.

41:44🔗 Adam He's got his radio checked.

41:46🔗 Drew It's a pretty simple issue. More often than not, it's nothing, but a doctor does need to look at this just to be doubly sure. I'd be interested to know if there's any blood with the urine also, which is a different implication. Could be stones, could be infection, any little burst blood vessel, could be no big deal.

42:01🔗 Adam Any blood with the urine? Little bit.

42:04🔗 Drew All right, that's actually a more serious issue, so you need to see a doctor about that. Blood in the urine is actually more serious than blood in the semen.

42:11🔗 Adam Yeah?

42:12🔗 Drew Yep.

42:12🔗 Adam I know in the semen, it just cuts to the core of all men.

42:16🔗 Drew Yeah, you think that that's when you get the airlift, the helicopter out. However, the reality is blood in the urine is the more serious issue.

42:23🔗 Adam Blood in the stool?

42:26🔗 Drew Depends how old you are. It's a sign we look for for cancer or pre-cancerous changes. And more often than not, in a young person, it's hemorrhoid.

42:33🔗 Adam Melissa?

42:34🔗 Caller Yes?

42:35🔗 Adam Year 20?

42:36🔗 Caller Yeah. I was just wondering, my boyfriend has what he claims is a pimple on his penis, like the top of the shaft closer to his lower abdomen.

42:46🔗 Drew Would that be the top or the bottom?

42:48🔗 Adam That'd be the top.

42:50🔗 Drew Near his abdomen?

42:51🔗 Adam Yeah.

42:52🔗 Drew That'd be the base, wouldn't it?

42:53🔗 Adam Well, no, no, no, no. She's talking...

42:55🔗 Drew She's talking about the top surface.

42:57🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, look, there's the bow and the stern, and then there's the keel and the crow's nest of a ship.

43:05🔗 Drew Yeah, and he's talking about the...

43:07🔗 Adam She's talking about the crow's nest.

43:08🔗 Drew Deck side. Yeah.

43:09🔗 Adam Yeah, she's talking about being top side.

43:11🔗 Caller Yeah.

43:11🔗 Drew Deck side at the keel.

43:13🔗 Caller Actually, the atempo, after he passed...

43:15🔗 Adam Hold on a second. You can't be deck side and at the keel.

43:18🔗 Drew I'm sorry. Deck side, aft.

43:20🔗 Adam Stern.

43:21🔗 Drew Stern. Stern is right. Stern is right.

43:23🔗 Adam Oh, it is?

43:24🔗 Drew Yeah.

43:24🔗 Adam Aft is the rear. Four's the...

43:28🔗 Drew Four and aft, stern and...

43:29🔗 Adam I thought the bow... the bow is the front of the ship.

43:32🔗 Drew And what's the back?

43:33🔗 Adam The back's the stern, right? And then four and aft is left and right, right?

43:38🔗 Drew Oh, for Christ's sake. Starboard. Starbird.

43:41🔗 Adam And what's four and aft then?

43:44🔗 Drew I thought aft was back.

43:45🔗 Adam Starbird and...

43:46🔗 Drew Give me the... Give me the... It's right there. It's right there.

43:48🔗 Adam What?

43:48🔗 Drew The...

43:48🔗 Caller Dictionary.

43:49🔗 Drew I know it troubles you to me to crack a dictionary, but... All right. Let's get back to our caller. Where'd she go?

43:55🔗 Adam Where is she?

43:56🔗 Drew You hung up?

43:56🔗 Adam No, I didn't hang up on her. How dare you? Melissa? Yeah. The top of the penis down toward the base.

44:03🔗 Drew Yeah. Yeah. That can be a pimple, actually. So what happens after he breaks it?

44:07🔗 Caller He popped it and he said that some white stuff came out, kind of like pus, and it got bigger to actually an inch in diameter, but it's not red or anything.

44:16🔗 Drew It's...

44:16🔗 Caller I'm sorry. I mean a centimeter.

44:19🔗 Drew It's a centimeter now? Yeah. It's probably a carbuncle. It's probably like a zit, basically.

44:23🔗 Adam Yeah. Why? Do you suspect he's been stepping out on you?

44:27🔗 Caller I don't know.

44:27🔗 Caller He did a long time ago, but he's been pretty faithful as far as I know lately.

44:32🔗 Caller So I was just...

44:33🔗 Adam That's client endorsement.

44:35🔗 Drew Aft, near, toward, or in the stern of a ship or tail of an aircraft.

44:40🔗 Adam Aft.

44:40🔗 Caller Whatever.

44:40🔗 Drew The back.

44:41🔗 Adam Yeah.

44:42🔗 Drew That's why I hear the aft. I don't know if airplane flying I do it.

44:45🔗 Adam Yeah.

44:45🔗 Drew Yeah.

44:46🔗 Adam Now what about... So...

44:47🔗 Drew It's back. That's what you said.

44:48🔗 Adam Oh, you said the aft.

44:49🔗 Drew Yeah.

44:50🔗 Adam But you said the fore is the front, the aft is the rear, and that's the same as the bow and the stern.

44:55🔗 Drew Yeah. Yeah.

44:55🔗 Adam Right. Okay. All right. Good. All right. Keep going. Melissa...

45:01🔗 Drew The aft is more of a tail of an aircraft.

45:03🔗 Adam That's what I was thinking. Born a ship.

45:05🔗 Drew Yeah.

45:05🔗 Adam All right. I don't know what we're talking about now.

45:08🔗 Drew Melissa, the problem is that...

45:10🔗 Adam Okay.

45:10🔗 Drew All right. Good luck. Good times.

45:12🔗 Adam He was cheating. She gave this great endorsement where, well, he cheated once, but I'm not... I don't think he's cheated as much as he used to as far as I know. It was a great...

45:22🔗 Drew She should just be concerned for her exposure to that, both in terms of her mental health and her physical health.

45:28🔗 Adam Right. Angie.

45:30🔗 Caller Hi.

45:31🔗 Adam What's up?

45:32🔗 Caller Well, I have a question for you guys. What do you think about... I'm in a relationship and he constantly is questioning me, he's controlling, and I wanted to know if you think that's projection or you think it could be insecurity.

45:50🔗 Drew You're wondering if he's the cheater.

45:52🔗 Caller If he's... Right. If he's projecting his guilt or whatever that might be.

45:56🔗 Drew Well...

45:57🔗 Adam It depends what kind of guy he is. If he's an aggressive guy, he's cheating. If he's just an insecure guy, he's not.

46:04🔗 Drew Either way, it's the same thing. It's the same phenomenon.

46:08🔗 Adam She wants to know whether he's cheating or not. And I'm saying if this guy's wearing a gold chain, driving a sports car and a little bit aggressive, he's cheating. If not, he's just paranoid and insecure. Which guy is he?

46:25🔗 Caller Excuse me?

46:26🔗 Drew Try it again. We've got a break.

46:30🔗 Adam Which guy is he?

46:31🔗 Caller We've got a break.

46:34🔗 Adam Is he the aggressive guy or is he the wimp?

46:37🔗 Caller He is aggressive as far as business goes, but he's not flashy as far as gold chain, but he does have a Rolex. We've been together a long time. We have a child.

46:49🔗 Adam All right. All right. Hold on. He's got a Rolex. I don't trust a Rolex guy. I'll get to the bottom of this guy when we come back.

46:59🔗 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

47:05🔗 Adam It is Love Line. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. I know I've spoken about this before, Drew, but I'm really thinking, and I'd like all our listeners to join in, and you too possibly, into a class action lawsuit against the manufacturers of sweatpants and hip cargo type pants. Well, you know these, I got a few pairs. I got a pair that Adida makes. They're these sort of all-terrain, all-pocket pants now. They got the little drawstring at the bottom cuff where the ankle is, and they're made out of this sort of, it's this sort of slippery material can get wet, and you can wear it dry or whatever. I don't know what it is, but the point is, it's greasy. I mean, it's slippery. You don't know what I'm talking about?

48:01🔗 Drew You can just slide out of your chair or something?

48:02🔗 Adam No, it's not like cotton. It's not like cotton pants. It's made out of, you know the pants I'm talking about?

48:09🔗 Drew Yeah, I know, but what's the suit about?

48:12🔗 Adam You put a handful of keys, a handful of change, some vitamins, a wallet, a cell phone.

48:17🔗 Drew Everything falls out.

48:17🔗 Adam You jump in the back of a cab, you get out, it's gone.

48:20🔗 Drew Yeah, yeah, yeah.

48:21🔗 Adam I left a bowel movement in a cab in Vegas. It slid out. This thing was so slippery.

48:26🔗 Drew But also the pockets are like, they're like this deep and angled back.

48:30🔗 Adam Pockets are at a bad angle. Sometimes they have a little flap that goes over it, but it's just a little flap. It's not, no way to really seal it up. And you hop into these. Now they're great when you're traveling. Like I said, I went to Vegas, I brought nothing, by the way. Something very, by the way, something very cool, very liberating about checking on to an airplane and in Burbank. And the woman behind the counter says, have you had all articles and baggage within your sight? And I said, no, I don't have any. This is it. I wore the same shirt and the same pants there as I wore back this morning at 630 in the morning. But the point is, the cell phone was in the back of the cab when I got out of the cab because everything just goes flying out of the pockets. And then I called it and some woman answered.

49:19🔗 Caller It was great.

49:20🔗 Adam And it's always, it's always that movie woman, you know, the woman in her fifties. You know, my phone's ringing in the back of this Vegas cab. She picks it up after about eight rings. She's a little confused.

49:30🔗 Caller Hello.

49:31🔗 Adam Hi. It's always that weird. You got to get started too. Hi. Is this my phone? Well, I don't know. Well, I mean, no. Let me start again. The phone, this is not your phone. No, it is not. It was ringing. It's next to you. Are you in a cab right now? Well, yes, I am. Well, this is my phone. Oh, I see. I'm sorry. Oh, that's all right. Where are you heading? I'm going to a wedding. Oh, that wedding is not at the Mandalay Bay, is it? No, it's not. Oh.

50:10🔗 Drew Give me the cabbie.

50:12🔗 Adam No.

50:12🔗 Drew No, you didn't say that?

50:13🔗 Adam No. She was like, well, if you want, she was going to a hotel. I can take the hotel. I'll take it with me to the hotel and drop it off at the concierge.

50:20🔗 Drew That's smart. Yeah, that's good.

50:22🔗 Adam Let's do that.

50:22🔗 Drew That's nice.

50:23🔗 Adam I never picked it up.

50:24🔗 Drew It's still there.

50:25🔗 Adam Still in Vegas.

50:25🔗 Drew Call the hotel that mails here.

50:27🔗 Adam Yeah, I was thinking about that. Who pays for the mailing?

50:29🔗 Drew You.

50:30🔗 Adam How do they know?

50:31🔗 Drew COD, care and delivery.

50:32🔗 Adam Really?

50:33🔗 Caller Yeah. All right.

50:34🔗 Adam I could go for that. I told her, listen, thanks. You want to make a phone call? Go ahead. I mean, just one. You know what I mean?

50:41🔗 Drew Now I'm just thinking, how are you going to get that away from the concierge? We need a positive ID. You'll have to come down here and identify the phone.

50:48🔗 Adam I can just see it now. As I tell them to turn the phone on and I scroll through the first 13 names that are on the pre-dial, it's not good enough kind of thing. You know what I mean?

50:59🔗 Drew You might have seen this phone somewhere before.

51:01🔗 Right. Right.

51:02🔗 Adam Right. Meanwhile, it's been there for two days and no one said anything. Who else would know the phone is there?

51:07🔗 Drew Yeah. However, they're going to have to dig it out of some pile of phones probably.

51:11🔗 Adam Oh, my God. All I'm saying is, is in the last couple years, three, four years, the sweat pants, the parachute pants, these all-terrain pants have been all the rage with the big baggy pockets. Everyone's got the cell phones and the pagers and what have you now. I bet wallet, I bet lost wallets, lost cell phones and lost keys are up 85 percent. I really do. They got to be spilling out all over the place. Every night I wear sweatpants in the show and every night I stand up when we're done and I look down underneath me and collect my keys and whatever else spilled out onto the floor. You want to join my lawsuit?

51:47🔗 Drew I feel your pain, yeah.

51:50🔗 Adam Angie?

51:51🔗 Caller Yes.

51:51🔗 Adam You're 23.

51:52🔗 Caller Yes.

51:53🔗 Adam What's up?

51:54🔗 Caller Well, I guess we left off.

51:56🔗 Adam Oh, that's right. That's right. The guy. That's right. He's constantly...

52:01🔗 Caller He's one of two.

52:03🔗 Adam Yeah. Let me reset here. He's constantly...

52:05🔗 Drew He's jealous, controlling, all over.

52:07🔗 Adam Giving you the fifth degree about...

52:09🔗 Caller Oh, interrogations, the whole bit. Yeah.

52:11🔗 Drew Yeah. There's all kinds of versions of this in reality. It's all bad. None of it's good. Yeah. None of it's good.

52:17🔗 Caller None of it's good, but I think that I could deal with working through insecurity issues rather than someone who likes to sleep around.

52:24🔗 Adam Have you ever done anything to lead him to believe that you were stepping out on him?

52:28🔗 Caller No, absolutely not. But when we first met, he asked about my past, my different partners and things like that. And I was completely honest. It's not like I was...

52:40🔗 Drew Big mistake. Big mistake.

52:42🔗 Caller Yeah. But I wasn't a horror.

52:47🔗 Drew So he brings that up now all the time, right?

52:49🔗 Caller No, he doesn't bring it up, but he says that because of that, he said it bothered him. And I don't... It's hard for me to believe that he is stepping out on me because he's coming home.

53:03🔗 Drew Hang on, Angie. Hold on a second. This is one of these guys that somebody's just go, hey, cut it out. Yeah. You like me? We're a relationship. You cut this crap out of our matter. That's it. Cut it out. Well, I do that.

53:14🔗 Caller And I left and he agreed to go to counseling because we do have a child.

53:18🔗 Drew What did you say to him exactly?

53:20🔗 Caller When I left?

53:21🔗 Drew Yeah.

53:22🔗 Caller Well, because it wasn't just like all of a sudden. Every time we would get an argument because he's extremely explosive and would be like on it's blocking on eggshells living with us.

53:33🔗 Drew No, no, no, no. This is a much, much more serious global issue than him being jealous or obsessing about your previous exploits.

53:42🔗 Caller Yeah.

53:43🔗 Adam He's got an anger management problem.

53:45🔗 Drew He's got some stuff. He has got some personality to some stuff going on here. Is he an addict? Is he an alcoholic? He is an alcoholic. Yeah. Okay. So that first and foremost needs to be dealt with. And you're wasting your time. You need to go to some Al-Anon. And I mean, you just sort of ring through with codependency here. You got to get a sponsor, work the steps and all of a sudden all this stuff you're obsessing about, magically may not seem so important.

54:10🔗 Adam Yeah.

54:10🔗 Drew Really?

54:11🔗 Adam Listen, on behalf of your child for Christ's sake.

54:15🔗 Drew And the only chance you have-

54:16🔗 Caller Well, I've got an accountant for myself.

54:17🔗 Drew Well, go to Al-Anon.

54:18🔗 Caller I've agreed to go with and-

54:19🔗 Drew No, no, no. You take care of yourself. If you go to Al-Anon, you get counseling. That's the only hope you have of him making change. Yes, my righteous indignation is back. Thank you. Thank you. And if you are successful in making some progress and growing, he will feel like you're sort of out of his grips. And that's really when he's going to freak out, when you see this emptiness for what it is, this straw dog.

54:44🔗 Caller I am afraid because he's already freaking out.

54:46🔗 Drew Hey, look, that's when he's going to do something because he knows he has to because you in fact will not put up with this anymore and you will leave. And that's when he will have a chance of getting better. In the meantime, do not worry about him. Worry about yourself.

54:58🔗 Adam And your kid.

55:00🔗 Caller Right. Definitely.

55:01🔗 Adam What's this guy? What's this guy in sales or real estate?

55:06🔗 Caller How did you guess? You're so good.

55:07🔗 Adam What is it?

55:08🔗 Caller Both. He's in sales. He's the owner of his own company and he's extremely aggressive, extremely competitive. He makes a good living, but he just has... He's emotionally a Nazi. I don't know what...

55:21🔗 Drew I know. He's an alcoholic. Look, he's an alcoholic. And that needs to be dealt with. And you're a raging codependent, we call that, and you need to deal with that. That might wake him up.

55:30🔗 Adam Yeah. And please, on behalf of the kid, and on my behalf, so I don't have to deal with the outcome of this kid. He's a mess growing up. Oh, do I hate these salesmen? They all have something wrong with him. Listen, ladies, listen to me. If you start dating a guy and he's in some form of sales, run the other way.

55:50🔗 Drew Oh, come on now.

55:51🔗 Adam Run the other way. All dicks. They're really idiots. Listen, have you met a guy who's in sales that had an actual ounce of his own personality?

56:00🔗 Drew Yes.

56:00🔗 Adam No, you have not.

56:01🔗 Drew Yes, I have.

56:02🔗 Adam No, you've met a very good salesman who's led you to believe he's not a colossal prick. They're all just the worst guys in the world, horrible personalities, lack of person, chameleon personalities. They're just horrible. They're the horrible guys. The Rolex, they got a nice pinky ring and a Italian horn chain, talking, kissing ass all the time. Just stay away from those guys, salesmen, agents, attorneys. I'm going to print a list, publicists. I'll print a list of guys to stay away from, ladies. The problem is, because these guys all have the same BS gene, you're most attracted to these idiots because not only can they sell a car, they sell themselves.

56:41🔗 Drew How about a woman that has those jobs?

56:44🔗 Adam They're bad too. Stay out of there. Not as bad as the guys.

56:47🔗 Drew Same issue?

56:50🔗 Adam Yeah, but they don't, because they don't have the testosterone mixed in with it, the sort of more genetic aggressive hand, they're not quite as bad, but they're pieces of work too. You got from female agents, female publicists, female attorneys, female salesmen, they're all a mess. Stay out of there, everybody. Don't date those people. Punish them. They need to be punished. You don't get all agents and managers and attorneys and publicists and salesmen, they should just not get laid. Straighten them out. Smoke them out. They're a-holes, all of them. They do nothing.

57:30🔗 Drew Relax.

57:30🔗 Adam Please, look in the mirror, you people.

57:33🔗 Drew Alan.

57:33🔗 Caller Yes.

57:34🔗 Adam Thank you.

57:34🔗 Drew What's going on?

57:37🔗 Caller Thanks for getting me on.

57:38🔗 Drew Yeah, in the midst of that tirade. Go ahead.

57:39🔗 Caller I love your show.

57:40🔗 Caller Yeah, what's up?

57:42🔗 Caller I'm concerned about the structure of the cartilage in my nose from doing a blow. The right nostril, I haven't been able to sniff through the right nostril very well for like a long time now. And I'm wondering if it will go back to where it was before.

58:01🔗 Drew Well, it depends.

58:02🔗 Adam What does Coke do to that cartilage?

58:04🔗 Drew Well, originally, cocaine was designed as something that you could put on the surface of, say, the nose and cause that area to be anesthetized. Not only would it numb the area, but it would also constrict the blood vessels and control bleeding. And so it was sort of the perfect local anesthetic, no bleeding, no feeling. And now, when you sniff the cocaine in your nose, it still does the same thing in terms of constricting blood vessels, and it constricts them so profoundly that the blood gets cut off to the cartilage and the cartilage just dissolves. And so you can get this septum between the two nostrils completely dissolves.

58:39🔗 Adam I've said it before, though, what do you need that for? And why not just have one big nostril?

58:43🔗 Drew And you basically eat away parts of the sinuses. It's a big mess.

58:47🔗 Adam What about speed? What's that do to your nose?

58:49🔗 Drew It doesn't do that because it doesn't have those vasoconstrictive properties. It's caustic. It irritates the hell out of Adam Corolla's bleeding. But it doesn't cause that same problem. It causes sinusitis, too.

58:57🔗 Caller Does it regenerate?

58:58🔗 Drew No.

58:59🔗 Caller Not at all?

58:59🔗 Drew No.

59:00🔗 Caller Well, if I can't breathe out of my right nostril, because it seems like it's caved into the right nostril.

59:05🔗 Drew Well, who knows what's going on? You don't know. Most of the time when somebody's doing a little blow, you look in there, you can't tell what's going on because there's all kinds of crap caked in there. You need to see your nose and throw a doctor and let them figure this out and try to treat it. The whole sinus could be completely occluded. It could be a big, big mess. Really?

59:22🔗 Caller I haven't done it in like seven months.

59:24🔗 Drew Well, it might need some operative.

59:26🔗 Adam I told you, you should have shot it or smoked it, Alan, but you wouldn't listen, would you? That's right. How long did you do Coke?

59:34🔗 Caller Often, maybe weekly for once or twice a week for like a year.

59:39🔗 Adam Yeah, that's it, huh?

59:40🔗 Caller Yeah, nothing too habitual.

59:44🔗 Adam You're away from it now, huh?

59:45🔗 Caller I'm away from it now. I've been for like seven months, but I was expected to go back to breathing, but I can't. It feels like I'm stuffed up all the time with the right nostril.

59:53🔗 Drew It needs to be checked out.

59:54🔗 Adam All right, ear, nose and throat guy. And a lot of these guys have all seen Coke damage by now, right?

1:00:01🔗 Drew Of course.

1:00:02🔗 Adam Yeah, so they're experts, right?

1:00:04🔗 Drew And he actually, Alan, I don't believe he's an addict. I think he's just an abuser.

1:00:08🔗 Adam Right, I believe it. All right, let's speak to Johan, who's 16. Johan? Johan? Johan?

1:00:18🔗 Caller Yeah?

1:00:19🔗 Adam All right, what's up?

1:00:21🔗 Not much, Adam.

1:00:23🔗 Adam All right, what's up? Are you depressed?

1:00:25🔗 Caller Huh?

1:00:26🔗 Adam Okay, I'm going to hang up on you in a second, all right?

1:00:29🔗 Caller Oh, sorry.

1:00:29🔗 Adam All right, start talking.

1:00:31🔗 Okay. Uh, not much.

1:00:34🔗 Caller I'm just kind of seriously whipped, that's all.

1:00:38🔗 Drew Well, you're like, you're like so depressed, you're like disconnected from reality here.

1:00:42🔗 Adam What? All right. Hang on, Yohan. Okay. All right. Just let him stew a little longer screwball. Anthony?

1:00:52🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:00:53🔗 Adam You're 25. What's up?

1:00:55🔗 Caller Well, um, for probably about nine months now, um, my semen's been getting thicker when I ejaculate. And I'm wondering if that's a sign of a STD or...

1:01:06🔗 Drew No, it's nothing.

1:01:08🔗 Caller It's nothing?

1:01:09🔗 Drew Nothing. It probably means you're masturbating less.

1:01:12🔗 Caller What's that?

1:01:13🔗 Drew Are you masturbating less than you were a month ago?

1:01:16🔗 Caller No, probably more.

1:01:17🔗 Drew More? Are you on medication?

1:01:19🔗 Caller No, none.

1:01:20🔗 Drew Don't do any steroids or anything like that?

1:01:23🔗 Caller No. I did drugs for a while.

1:01:26🔗 Drew What drugs?

1:01:28🔗 Caller Pretty much everything. Ecstasy, um, speed, um, GHBK.

1:01:33🔗 Drew GHB. Interesting.

1:01:35🔗 Adam What about, what about fluid in general? And being hydrated? That kind of thing.

1:01:40🔗 Drew That could help.

1:01:41🔗 Caller Um, I'm sorry?

1:01:43🔗 Drew You have no history of steroid use though, huh?

1:01:45🔗 Caller No.

1:01:45🔗 Drew Okay. Well, when you were using drugs, you may not have been producing as much semen. I mean, your body is, is disturbed by all that.

1:01:53🔗 Caller Well, when I was doing drugs, it was fine. And then, um, after I like went off, like after I stopped, I haven't done drugs in a while.

1:01:59🔗 Drew No, what I'm saying is it wasn't fine then. Now it's fine. This is now your normal state. Before was in the altered state.

1:02:07🔗 Caller Oh, really?

1:02:08🔗 Adam It's better this way because you can flick it off your belly before you step into the shower.

1:02:13🔗 Caller It doesn't look too attractive. It's really thick and kind of clunky, so that's nothing that I should be worried about.

1:02:20🔗 Drew No.

1:02:20🔗 Adam No. You're fine. Oh, I'm telling you. You know, you get, you get your belly covered with hair like mine and it's a mess.

1:02:30🔗 Drew Shag carpet with grape, with peanut butter.

1:02:34🔗 Adam I really, if you dusted my area, you could find probably semen from 12 years ago. 87, 88.

1:02:41🔗 Drew Yeah, I'm sure.

1:02:42🔗 Adam Easily.

1:02:43🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:02:44🔗 Adam There's just no way it's all coming out. It's soap up, but no. No.

1:02:49🔗 Caller Nice.

1:02:49🔗 Adam It really gets worked into the fiber.

1:02:56🔗 Caller Mark.

1:02:59🔗 Adam Mark.

1:03:00🔗 Yeah, I'm here.

1:03:01🔗 Drew You guys, we got to have callers.

1:03:02🔗 Adam Hey, Mark, start speaking up.

1:03:04🔗 Drew Callers must be able to speak, talk.

1:03:06🔗 All right.

1:03:07🔗 Adam Go ahead.

1:03:08🔗 My question is, I've been having white flaky pubic hairs.

1:03:13🔗 Drew White flaky?

1:03:15🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:03:15🔗 Adam What do you mean by flaky?

1:03:17🔗 Well, they're like, I can touch them and they'll like flake off in my hand.

1:03:20🔗 Caller I used to work at the flaky wiener.

1:03:23🔗 Drew That's Dicky.

1:03:24🔗 Adam That's Dicky. They'll flake off in your hand, so they'll like fall out. Yeah.

1:03:29🔗 I can pull them out like by 10 or 20.

1:03:33🔗 Adam And you have quite a few of these? Yes.

1:03:35🔗 Drew And the skin's normal from which they're coming out of?

1:03:38🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:03:39🔗 It's mostly like right under the base of my penis and right at the bottom of my scrotum.

1:03:46🔗 Drew You pull hair out of your scrotum?

1:03:48🔗 Adam Yeah. Why are you pulling them out?

1:03:50🔗 Because I don't want them there if they're like mutated or something.

1:03:56🔗 Adam What about this, Drew?

1:03:57🔗 Drew I can't quite visualize. Now, listen, can we, do you have a digital camera?

1:04:03🔗 No.

1:04:04🔗 Caller Oh, damn it.

1:04:05🔗 Adam Well. You want to see a picture of it?

1:04:07🔗 Drew Yes.

1:04:07🔗 Adam That's never going to happen.

1:04:08🔗 Drew You're gay.

1:04:10🔗 Adam Drew, what about this? I think I've had a gray pub before.

1:04:14🔗 Drew Yeah, sure.

1:04:14🔗 Adam But it wasn't fall out.

1:04:16🔗 Drew But he's got patches of them that fall off.

1:04:19🔗 Adam What would cause that on someone's head?

1:04:23🔗 Drew Seborrhea. Some sort of skin problem.

1:04:26🔗 Adam And that's what would... So what should he do? Dermatologist?

1:04:29🔗 Drew Yeah, a dermatologist. I cannot visualize what he's describing. Yeah. By the way, anybody wants to send digital images, I think that's the new level that Loveline will come to now.

1:04:41🔗 Adam Are you kidding?

1:04:42🔗 Drew No. Everyone has a digital camera. Everyone has email access. Give me a digital image. Email it to here at the Loveline website and I'll look at stuff.

1:04:50🔗 Adam Drew, we can't get goddamn paper for the fax machine here. Do you think you're going to pull that off?

1:04:56🔗 Drew Yes, I do.

1:04:57🔗 Adam Really?

1:04:57🔗 Drew I do.

1:04:58🔗 Adam Okay.

1:05:00🔗 Drew Because otherwise, the rash thing, all of the people describing stuff on the surface of their body, forget it.

1:05:05🔗 Adam Right.

1:05:05🔗 Drew You get nothing.

1:05:06🔗 Adam Rick? Well, maybe if you're a better doctor. Rick, you're 17. Yeah.

1:05:10🔗 Drew Kiss my hand.

1:05:11🔗 Adam What is up?

1:05:12🔗 Caller Oh, yeah. My best friend's girlfriend has been leading me on sexually. And she's been like, I've been going to her house with a couple of friends, you know, just to hang around.

1:05:25🔗 Caller But what's called?

1:05:26🔗 Caller You know, she's been leading me on. I found out that she's buying. And...

1:05:32🔗 Adam And what do you mean leading you on?

1:05:34🔗 Caller Well, she's been constantly...

1:05:38🔗 Drew Flirting.

1:05:39🔗 Adam Flirting with you.

1:05:40🔗 Caller Oh, yeah. Like, she's been squeezing, you know.

1:05:43🔗 Adam But she's a little troubled, right?

1:05:48🔗 Caller I really don't know what that is.

1:05:50🔗 Adam You don't know what troubled is?

1:05:51🔗 Caller I don't know. What do you mean by that?

1:05:53🔗 Adam Well, she... She's chaotic, her life. It's not... She's a bad girl.

1:06:00🔗 Caller Not really.

1:06:01🔗 Adam No?

1:06:01🔗 Caller No.

1:06:02🔗 Adam Okay. Maybe you're just a bad guy and you don't notice it. But this is your best friend's girl? Yes. So why are you even thinking about it?

1:06:10🔗 Caller Oh, I'm not. She's the one that's been leading me on, but I guess I'm starting to like it.

1:06:15🔗 Adam You do like it?

1:06:17🔗 Caller Yes, to a certain point, yes.

1:06:18🔗 Adam Right. Sure. It's flattering to have some attention, but you're not going to do anything about it because it's your best friend's girl, right?

1:06:24🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:06:24🔗 Drew Yeah. Why would you even think about it?

1:06:26🔗 Adam Well, listen, he's a lonely guy, 17. She's cute.

1:06:30🔗 She's coming on him.

1:06:31🔗 Drew He's sort of...

1:06:33🔗 Adam But he's desperate. He doesn't have a girl of his own.

1:06:36🔗 Drew Yeah, but he shouldn't be putting himself in circumstances where something could happen. He's going to her house. He's letting this go further to show.

1:06:44🔗 Caller Yeah. When we've been there without my friend, other people have been around. She's been constantly asking if we want to have orgies or...

1:06:55🔗 Drew Stay away. Stay away unless you want to lose your friend.

1:06:58🔗 Caller The most people like...

1:07:00🔗 Drew Hey, cut it out. Just stay away. You're going to lose your friend.

1:07:03🔗 Adam And she's chaos. She's trouble.

1:07:04🔗 Drew And he's going to learn soon enough what she's about. And you don't want to be a part of that. You want him blaming you for how she is.

1:07:10🔗 Adam You tell your friend to wear a condom, too. You don't want to get this one pregnant.

1:07:13🔗 Drew Or get anything from her.

1:07:15🔗 Adam Right. Because she's out of control. And Rick is one handy away from not thinking about this girl anymore.

1:07:23🔗 Drew Less than a handy. Like one Mickey's big mouth. From not thinking about his friend anymore.

1:07:29🔗 Adam Well, when I'm...

1:07:30🔗 Drew One handy from someone else.

1:07:30🔗 Adam No, he needs a handy from somebody else. Well, I've been there where Rick is. Which is you have no female in your life. Nobody likes you. You don't meet anybody. You can't go out and score.

1:07:42🔗 Drew You've now made contact.

1:07:46🔗 Adam The list of women who you could actually talk to, phone up, hang out with is so short...

1:07:52🔗 Drew One person...

1:07:53🔗 Adam .that anybody who gets on this list outside of the family and sometimes even inside the family, you're attracted to, right? Yeah. You remember those days? Yeah.

1:08:02🔗 Drew Neighbors, whatever.

1:08:04🔗 Adam Just, you know, so it would be like, yeah, my sister's best friend and my best friend's girlfriend, I like them both. They hang out. They know my name. They talk to me. They come over. They're nice to me. They give me a hug when they come and go. So I'm into both of them. Why? Because...

1:08:19🔗 Drew Proximity.

1:08:20🔗 Adam There's nobody else. I don't have a girlfriend and no one at school likes me. So that's... Rick needs to do that. And they always mistake it. I mean, here's the deal.

1:08:30🔗 Drew Well, this one, he might be maybe stirring up some problem.

1:08:34🔗 Adam But as a 17-year-old guy, you got some love to give.

1:08:37🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:08:37🔗 Adam And...

1:08:38🔗 Drew Excess.

1:08:39🔗 Adam And if you don't have a girlfriend or a couple of chicks you're dating from school or whatever, then your step-sister's going to get it, or your best friend's girlfriend, or the dog, or the beanbag chair. Whoever's around is going to get that love. Or the sheep. All right. Let's take ourselves a break, Drew. What do you say?

1:08:58🔗 Drew Yeah, I do.

1:08:59🔗 Adam Please. We'll be back.

1:09:02🔗 Caller Hello? Is this Loveline?

1:09:04🔗 Caller Call 1-800-LOVE-191. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.

1:09:09🔗 Adam I'm Adam. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Let's talk to Sarah, who's 23. Sarah? Hi. Hey.

1:09:20🔗 Caller How are you?

1:09:21🔗 Adam Good. What's up?

1:09:23🔗 Caller Oh, I'm kind of having some problems, and I'm just hoping you could help me out.

1:09:28🔗 Caller All right.

1:09:29🔗 Adam Uh-oh. What's up with the phone? Where are you calling from?

1:09:32🔗 Caller I'm calling from work.

1:09:33🔗 Caller Okay.

1:09:34🔗 Adam What do you do?

1:09:35🔗 Caller I work at a porn store.

1:09:37🔗 Adam That's great. What do you work... What's the big seller there at the porn store?

1:09:43🔗 Caller Oh, probably videos. Yeah, I've actually been listening to your show, and the guy who had the thing about the videos, it's actually true.

1:09:54🔗 Adam People return videos with schmutz on them.

1:09:57🔗 Caller Yes, absolutely.

1:09:59🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:09:59🔗 Caller It's pretty gross.

1:10:00🔗 Adam More with the gay porn than with the straight porn, or does it matter?

1:10:04🔗 Caller More with the straight porn, surprisingly.

1:10:07🔗 Adam More with the straight?

1:10:08🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:10:09🔗 Adam I'm not surprised. The gays are a little more fastidious and tend to clean things a little better, right?

1:10:16🔗 Caller Yeah, they're more prissy, actually.

1:10:18🔗 Drew Nice.

1:10:19🔗 Adam They're prissier. Really?

1:10:22🔗 Drew What's your question, Sarah?

1:10:24🔗 Caller Okay, I just got into a relationship with a guy. He's two years younger than me, and he had had sex in four years until I came along. We finally started to have sex, and everything's going really good, and he's got an erection and everything.

1:10:46🔗 Drew Oh, and everything.

1:10:48🔗 Caller But there's a problem.

1:10:49🔗 Adam You really struck gold with this 19-year-old.

1:10:52🔗 Drew Everything.

1:10:52🔗 Adam Erection and everything.

1:10:54🔗 Caller There's a problem though.

1:10:56🔗 Caller Every time we tried to put the condom on, he can't sustain his erection. He just goes limp.

1:11:01🔗 Adam Falls off.

1:11:02🔗 Drew He needs to train, Adam.

1:11:03🔗 Adam Yes. How old is he? Twenty-three. Didn't have sex for four years.

1:11:11🔗 Caller Didn't have sex for four years.

1:11:13🔗 Adam So he basically he lost his virginity and then had a long dry spell?

1:11:17🔗 Caller Yeah, something like that. I think the girl before me kind of ruined him.

1:11:22🔗 Adam Right. So his erection is fine. Everything looks great. And then he puts the condom on. And as he's putting it on, he has a little too much time to think. And he freaks, right?

1:11:32🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:11:33🔗 Adam OK. Here's what you need to do. You have access to a lot of condoms where you work, right?

1:11:39🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:11:40🔗 Adam Once you take home a handful of those, throw it to them, tell them to practice beating off and then stopping and putting the condom on in the middle of it and then finishing himself off with the condom on. OK. Oh, yeah. That's how I masturbate on airplanes, by the way.

1:11:56🔗 Drew Oh, really?

1:11:56🔗 Adam Yes.

1:11:57🔗 Drew No muss?

1:11:57🔗 Adam Yeah. No muss. Right. No fuss. Right.

1:11:59🔗 Drew Interesting.

1:12:00🔗 Adam I don't want to excuse myself to the bathroom. I'm in first class.

1:12:02🔗 Drew Oh, you just stay right there in the chair.

1:12:04🔗 Adam Well, I feel like, hey, $4,200 bucks in New York? Sure. I could beat something off right here.

1:12:09🔗 Drew Sure.

1:12:10🔗 Adam All right. But the point is I don't want to make a mess. I got to get off the plane. I'm on the run.

1:12:15🔗 Drew And you don't want to lose that erection.

1:12:16🔗 Adam I'm wearing my best sweatpants, is it?

1:12:17🔗 Caller Right.

1:12:18🔗 Adam So, Sarah, do that and tell them to start getting used to that. It'll work.

1:12:24🔗 Caller Oh.

1:12:26🔗 Adam Did you hear my advice?

1:12:27🔗 Caller Yeah. Well, I mean, when he goes limp, I've given him fellatio.

1:12:34🔗 Adam Sure.

1:12:35🔗 Caller And he goes erect again. But then I'll try to put the condom on again and he still goes limp.

1:12:41🔗 Drew She's not listening to you. She's not listening.

1:12:44🔗 Adam No, I think, let me get her to...

1:12:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:12:47🔗 Adam So just tell him what I told you to do, which is what?

1:12:51🔗 Caller To beat off.

1:12:53🔗 Adam To beat off.

1:12:54🔗 Caller Nobody's listening.

1:12:55🔗 Adam Sarah?

1:12:56🔗 Caller Yes.

1:12:58🔗 Adam First, you're 23, you're working at a porn store.

1:13:00🔗 Caller What went wrong?

1:13:02🔗 Adam What happened, baby?

1:13:04🔗 Caller Oh, I needed a job.

1:13:06🔗 Adam I see.

1:13:06🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:13:07🔗 Adam But, you know, part of part of being stupid is not only doing stupid things, but it's ignoring advice from people who aren't stupid, like myself. You see what I'm saying, Sarah?

1:13:21🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:13:21🔗 Adam Now, I told you what to do.

1:13:23🔗 Caller And you didn't hear any of it.

1:13:24🔗 Adam You didn't hear any of it, did you?

1:13:27🔗 Caller I did.

1:13:28🔗 Adam Well, what should you do then?

1:13:31🔗 Caller Just hand them a thing full of condoms and just kind of hope for the best.

1:13:36🔗 Adam Okay. Wow.

1:13:38🔗 Drew How could you have gotten that from what you said?

1:13:41🔗 Adam Hey, Drew.

1:13:42🔗 Drew That's incredible.

1:13:43🔗 Adam Look.

1:13:44🔗 Drew That is incredible to me.

1:13:46🔗 Adam Drew, I say this every week and I know it doesn't win me any fans, but some people are stupid. Listen, you know how some people are smart?

1:13:54🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:13:55🔗 Adam We all understand that concept. Let's just focus on, forget about stupid and smart. You know some guys are good athletes.

1:14:03🔗 Drew Right.

1:14:04🔗 Adam How do you know they're good athletes?

1:14:05🔗 Drew They perform well.

1:14:07🔗 Adam Right. But does everyone perform well?

1:14:09🔗 Drew No.

1:14:09🔗 Adam Is everyone captain of the football team? No. Varsity track and all? No. Is everyone, you know, Ken Griffey Jr. and Mark McGuire? No. Why not? There's a relative thing. There's all the guys who suck. We understand that concept. Same in the brains department. Sarah's 23. She's peddling dildos for a living. She's not a smart person. And she doesn't, part of being dumb is not listening that well.

1:14:35🔗 Drew That not listening piece is phenomenal to me.

1:14:37🔗 Adam Okay, but she is working at a store.

1:14:40🔗 Drew It's one thing if you were trying to describe how to solve the Schrodinger equation to her and she couldn't get it. But not understanding a couple of basic sentences, not hearing.

1:14:48🔗 Adam To be...

1:14:48🔗 Drew Basic instruction.

1:14:50🔗 Adam To be fair, somebody could have, you know, went in and tried to buy, you know, the Badger or the Widowmaker or something like that, some big dildo. She could have been distracted with a big sale.

1:15:02🔗 Drew All right. So give it to her now.

1:15:04🔗 Adam Bring the condoms to him. Tell him to practice putting the condoms on...

1:15:09🔗 Drew By himself.

1:15:09🔗 Adam By himself.

1:15:10🔗 Drew Drill. Drilling.

1:15:11🔗 Adam While he's masturbating. So that his penis can actually get used to it.

1:15:16🔗 Drew So he can get used to putting the condom on without losing the erection. Alone.

1:15:20🔗 Adam Right.

1:15:20🔗 Drew And finishing.

1:15:21🔗 Adam Right.

1:15:22🔗 Drew And then he can get to the point where he's doing that with you present.

1:15:25🔗 Adam I'm telling you, as a society, we stress this for everything. We want our students to study and rehearse. We want musical instruments, constant rehearsal, whatever you want to be in life, whether it's an airplane pilot or attorney or physician, it's all rehearse, rehearse, work, work, work, repetitive, repetitive, repetitive stuff.

1:15:45🔗 Drew Right?

1:15:46🔗 Adam Why does no one bring this up with the condom in the erection? So put them on while they're hard. Get your penis used to it.

1:15:53🔗 Drew Put them on while they're hard.

1:15:55🔗 Adam Get them while they're hard.

1:15:56🔗 Drew There you go.

1:15:57🔗 Adam Martin?

1:15:58🔗 Caller Hey, what's up?

1:15:58🔗 Adam You're 19.

1:16:00🔗 Caller First time caller. Just want to say I like you guys' show.

1:16:02🔗 Adam Thanks.

1:16:04🔗 Caller Just a question for you, Adam.

1:16:06🔗 Caller Well, you gotta rip on salespeople.

1:16:07🔗 Adam No, they're horrible, that's why. Those people aren't horrible. Now look, I'm not talking about this schmuck who stands behind the register at the bookstore. That's not a sales guy.

1:16:19🔗 Caller Well, I sell computers. I work at a major electronics chain. It's not like I'm selling cars, you know.

1:16:28🔗 Adam Yeah, I know. You guys are pretty bad. You guys are bad. You guys are the guys who pushed a warranty.

1:16:36🔗 Caller No, we just offer it.

1:16:37🔗 Adam You push that warranty pretty good, right?

1:16:41🔗 Caller No, it's just offered.

1:16:42🔗 Caller If a customer says no, then no big deal.

1:16:44🔗 Adam All right. Well, you're not going to last in this business.

1:16:50🔗 Caller What about the community college?

1:16:53🔗 Adam Oh, yeah. Community college and sales. That's two strikes right there. That's horrible. But look, if you're using the community college to try to get out of sales, I'll accept it.

1:17:03🔗 Caller Oh, really?

1:17:04🔗 Adam Yes.

1:17:04🔗 Caller Oh, wow.

1:17:05🔗 Adam Temporarily.

1:17:06🔗 Drew A condition for community college.

1:17:07🔗 Adam And I got to tell you this. When I'm in charge of the junior college program in the United States, I will clean house every three years.

1:17:16🔗 Drew No one's allowed to stay longer than three years.

1:17:17🔗 Adam That's right. I will walk up and down the corridors and go, Look, old timer, I saw you playing hacky sack when you were 15 in these halls. You're now, you know, now I see in here with your kids driving a minivan. Get the hell out of here. Clear out. That's what I'm going to do. Clear out. You got three years to get a two-year education. That's fine. That's like having six years to get a four-year, right?

1:17:38🔗 Drew You're right. You figure Martin's not a salesman.

1:17:41🔗 Adam All right.

1:17:41🔗 Drew Anyway, right?

1:17:42🔗 Adam Right.

1:17:42🔗 Drew You figure Martin's not a true salesman.

1:17:45🔗 Adam I don't know. I don't know.

1:17:46🔗 Caller Those people, you know, wipe their teeth like everybody thinks. Some people are there, you know, some people just come in and know what they want. They want to buy it.

1:17:53🔗 Caller We just ring it up.

1:17:54🔗 Adam All right. But again, again, I would I would argue that that is not really a salesman. It's a sort of sales clerk.

1:18:03🔗 Caller But then also there's the people that know what they want.

1:18:05🔗 Caller We got to spend an hour, help them out, find what they need. Also, too, you know, somebody that.

1:18:10🔗 Adam All right, right. You make a very compelling yet boring case. Let me let me amend what I was saying. When I went talking about sales, guys who sell stuff, I'm not talking about the 19 year old who works at the good guys, who stands by the, you know, Yamaha cassette players and the VCR and just stands there and basically points stuff out. No commission and no nothing. It's like saying, it's like if I'm working for Greenpeace and I'm some vegan and I got a problem with the kid who works at McDonald's.

1:18:45🔗 Drew Right.

1:18:46🔗 Adam That's not who my, he's just working there, he's trying to make his nut so he can go on to something else. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the career guy.

1:18:55🔗 Drew The professional salesman.

1:18:56🔗 Adam The guy who's been selling cars for 25 years. That guy. You know the guy I'm talking about, not the 19 year old who stands around the computer. And by the way, if they could get rid of you guys, they would. And they're this close to doing it. So I mean, you know, I mean, that's not really a salesman. You're not, you're not cut in for a taste. Right. All right. Anyway, he makes a horrible point because he has, he has nothing. He's not who I was talking about. All right. Let's talk to Gigi.

1:19:27🔗 Caller Hey, what's going on?

1:19:28🔗 Adam Ann couldn't have been a salesman because of his boring affect. He had no personality. All right. Go ahead, Gigi.

1:19:34🔗 Caller Hi, Adam. I think your wit is absolutely genuine. You're like a sentence character. But anyway, I just want to know about like sex addiction because last week, Drew, you told me you told like the rest of the world that 75 percent of addicts recovering or out there using are sex addicts. So I want to know a brief vague description of what it is because I want to know.

1:20:02🔗 Drew A brief vague description?

1:20:03🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:20:04🔗 Caller That...

1:20:06🔗 Caller For a recovering person.

1:20:08🔗 Drew Well, a recovering person, a recovering person who is still engaging in destructive relationships is not in recovery.

1:20:16🔗 Caller Okay.

1:20:17🔗 Drew That somebody whose recovery has got a problem with it.

1:20:19🔗 Caller Okay.

1:20:19🔗 Drew And that may or may not be sexual addiction, but I guarantee you that person is not following the input of their sponsor or their peers. Right. Because I'm sure the peers... Anyone that is not following direction is not in a good recovery. Period. If somebody is out to this sponsor and says, hey, that guy do not get involved in a relationship for one year and you go out and do it anyway, that's a relapse. You may not be using drugs yet, but it's just a matter of time before you will be. That's the nature of recovery.

1:20:48🔗 Caller I see that, but...

1:20:50🔗 Drew And whether if they're compulsive and they're having multiple sexual partners, and they're really going after the reward activation just as they would be with a drug, and if they have a biology of addiction, if they have evidence of addiction of other chemicals, and now you sprinkle in some sort of abuse, physical or sexual abuse, you get a sex addict. That's sort of the recipe for that.

1:21:12🔗 Caller Because Anderson just thought I was naïve, but yeah, my sister exhibits all those signs, so.

1:21:17🔗 Drew All right, but the most important thing here though is she's supposed to be in recovery?

1:21:21🔗 Caller Well, she is in recovery.

1:21:23🔗 Drew No, she isn't, because she's not following the direction of her sponsor.

1:21:25🔗 Caller No, no, no, I don't see that, because, you know, it's a separate issue, but it's still an issue.

1:21:31🔗 Drew But is she following the direction of her sponsor?

1:21:34🔗 Caller Yeah, well, I don't know, but this is like her, she lies and she...

1:21:38🔗 Drew All right, that's not recovery.

1:21:39🔗 Caller Right.

1:21:40🔗 Drew That is not recovery. Lying is not recovery. It's an honest program of recovery. You're as sick as your secrets and your lies. That's it. That's not recovery. That's somebody who's struggling with their disease, but not in recovery.

1:21:50🔗 Adam Hey, Gigi?

1:21:51🔗 Drew Yeah?

1:21:52🔗 Adam You're 17? How old's your sister?

1:21:54🔗 Caller 32.

1:21:55🔗 Adam And why don't you cut her loose?

1:21:57🔗 Drew Cut her?

1:21:57🔗 Caller Well, no, I'm not. I'm not, I just want to know what is wrong with her, so I don't have to...

1:22:02🔗 Drew She's an addict. She's an addict.

1:22:03🔗 Adam She's an addict, but how, once you... I understand you're worrying about her.

1:22:07🔗 Caller She's an addict. No, she's a sex addict. And it's like, anywhere I go with her, she's wanting to screw someone, so it's like, I need to learn how to deal with that.

1:22:15🔗 Drew You need to go to Hell and On. You're going to go to some kind of code of penance or recovery. Why are you...

1:22:20🔗 Caller It's not that addiction part, it's just like, all of a sudden she's a sex addict, so I just want to know if that's what she was.

1:22:26🔗 Drew Gigi, now you're not listening to Direction. I deal with these people... I deal with... Listen to me. I deal with these people...

1:22:32🔗 Adam I'm starting to worry for Gigi.

1:22:33🔗 Drew I know, yeah. I deal with these people every day and I'm telling you, you as a 17 year old are not going to be able to manage anything with her.

1:22:40🔗 Caller No, I'm not trying to.

1:22:41🔗 Drew Listen to me. Listen to me. Listen to me. You need to go to some form of co-dependency recovery, some sort of ongoing support for yourself. I told you, the Righteous Indignation was coming back. Yeah. And if you want to get her to some treatment, Delamo down in Torrance has a good sexual addiction treatment program. Why is that funny?

1:23:04🔗 Adam Hey, Gigi. Gigi.

1:23:05🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:23:06🔗 Adam Listen, don't call this show and not listen and laugh and throw your attitude around.

1:23:11🔗 Caller I'm not throwing at it.

1:23:12🔗 Adam Yes, you are. You don't even know it.

1:23:14🔗 Caller Adam, don't take salespeople. And you're the man of all men. Listen to you.

1:23:21🔗 Adam Wait. Hey, screwball.

1:23:22🔗 Caller Hey, screwball.

1:23:23🔗 Adam Have fun with your sister, would you?

1:23:27🔗 Caller Adam.

1:23:28🔗 Adam Have a good time. Idiot. Did I use the F word there?

1:23:33🔗 Drew I guess you did.

1:23:34🔗 Adam All right. Listen, these people are starting to piss me off, Drew. I really mean it. I've had enough of them. I know. Listen, I feel sorry for Gigi because wherever her sister came from, she came from that too. And I know she feels like she's got to take care of her sister. But she's 17. Her sister's 32. Let her, you know, steer her to some help and then go do her own thing.

1:23:56🔗 Caller But Gigi's angry.

1:23:58🔗 Drew The two different pieces of advice that were specific, she becomes hostile and laughs at it.

1:24:02🔗 Caller Right.

1:24:03🔗 Drew You go to her, you get her a dilemma. Right. What the hell else are you going to do?

1:24:07🔗 Adam Oh, look, as I've said many a time, I would like to help everybody. And there are people who are calling the show who want help. And then there are those who don't. And my thing is, if you don't, don't call. That's fine. I wish you the best of luck. Just don't call the show.

1:24:22🔗 Drew By the way, if things were easy and simple, you'd already do it yourself. And if it wasn't difficult and hard and confusing, you wouldn't need direction.

1:24:30🔗 Adam Right. All right. We'll take a break. I'll see if I can say the F word again.

1:24:34🔗 Drew I like that.

1:24:34🔗 Adam We'll be back.

1:24:36🔗 Caller Unacceptable.

1:24:45🔗 Adam Loveline, everybody. I'm Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew over there. I'm going to get back to the phone, solve some problems. Let me tell you something that happened to me today.

1:24:56🔗 Drew What? This is in Vegas or?

1:24:57🔗 Adam Well, I took a, as I said at the top of the show, I flew out to Vegas last night about 730 in the evening. And then I flew home this morning at 630 in the morning. Just stayed up all night. Basically stayed up 24 hours and had a good time. Had the, how dare you, Anderson, had the guy in the fly, flew southwest, of course. So, you know, it's no science eating, right? Traveling with two buddies. So there's three of us. The plane was about 80, 85 percent full each time, which is good. It's usually 110 percent. Right. And each time got on to the plane, happened going to Vegas and coming back. One time was a lady looked like she was in her mid 40s. She was just alone in an aisle of three. Now, I'm not exaggerating at all, had not sat down, was walking in front of me down the aisle, got to a vacant aisle of three things, stopped, started to step into the aisle, had not sat down. And I said, excuse me, miss, there's an open chair on the other side of the aisle. Not, not, there wasn't even a guy there, it was just an open chair. I said, I have my two buddies, there's three of us here. Do you, would you mind taking this seat so we can sit together? And she did one of those things that I can't stand, which is, she gave me the, yeah, yeah, you know, like that, that thing. Like, I don't mind the guy who says no.

1:26:26🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:26:27🔗 Adam And I don't mind the guy who says, sure, buddy. I don't, it's the, I'll let you do it, but I'm gonna let you know that this is really some pain. And I have some drama I got to live out with you that's meant for other people, but you're gonna get some too.

1:26:39🔗 Drew You feel like just saying, hey.

1:26:41🔗 Adam No, you know what I say to those people all the time? And they always, I think they get embarrassed by it. I say to them, especially if they're smaller than I am, I say, hey, is it a problem? No, no, no problem, no problem. And I'll stop them again. I'll go, hey, listen, if it's a problem, just tell me what, tell me what the problem is. No, no, forget it. Have your seat. You know, it's like, it's that thing. It's like, I've once again been victimized. That's basically their cry. Meanwhile, no different than sitting in an aisle between two people you don't know or sitting in a chair between two people you don't know and sitting on the other side of the aisle between two people you don't know. She was traveling alone on a crowded plane to Vegas for 45 minutes, but no. And flying back, exact same thing, same scenario. Got on the plane. Female or male? Usually the middle-aged chick fit the criteria for this. This is a semi-younger guy, a guy like early 20s, just like a regular guy. Same thing. He hadn't sat down yet, had not sat down. I said, can you mind, before you sit down, can we take these? I got three of them. But that's what it was.

1:27:47🔗 Drew I think it's a good thing to come back from Vegas is most of them are hungover and they're on speed or something, you know what I mean?

1:27:53🔗 Adam I'll get them coming back. But two of those. And listen folks, I understand you got your problems. Keep them to yourself, please. Or don't do it. Don't do what? Chicken ass. Don't move. Let's go now, I'm going to be an a-hole and sit here. I don't give a... Somehow, what do I got to do? Send you over some flowers? I really feel crushed. Then I had another great thing. I PO'd the flight attendant at Southwest because they're not real friendly. I mean, they're OK friendly, but let's face it, they're running a... It's really the train to Cracow over there is what that is. It's not a flight. And I understand this, everybody, because here's the deal. It used to be only a certain percentage of people could fly. And that's because it was expensive and only the top 10% of the country or the nation could fly. This is many years ago. Now, you can fly, you can hop on a price line on your computer and get a round trip ticket to Chicago for $189. And you're wondering why the guy sitting behind you is wearing the cutoff sweatpants and scratching his crotch the whole time. And has a bad BO. Because now everyone can do it. This is what happens. I'm fine with that concept. But now, because of this, the flight attendants have an ass full of this.

1:29:13🔗 Drew Yes.

1:29:14🔗 Adam They usually were dealing with guys wearing like ascots and bow ties and wearing a blazer to go fly 25 years ago. And now they got the guy to cutoff sweatpants and the king's jersey.

1:29:24🔗 Drew Right.

1:29:24🔗 Adam He's scratching himself. So they have no time for anything. So we're sitting there and the flight attendant from Southwest said, what do you guys, you guys want something to drink? You know, they're big hurry all the time. So I said, yeah, give me a, give me a Miller Light. My other buddy said, yeah, give me a Coors Light. And my other buddy said, give me a Coke. And we said, no, no, no, give him a Coke, give him a beer. And he went like, yeah. Right in the middle of that, she jumped in and said, it's pretty, pretty crowded flight. Let's go, basically. So she said, so he said, okay, give me a beer. So she said, okay, Miller Light, you know, and still light. And she flubbed, she flubbed the word. And I said, look, it's, it's a crowded flight. We don't have time for you to stammer. Let's go. Oh, no. PO'd. That was it. Guess who got it? Wonderful stories. Guess who got his, guess who got his beer? 20 minutes after the other two guys got the beer and then collect, they had to collect it after it took one sip off. A little payback time, but come on. You bust balls. You got to get your balls busted, right?

1:30:27🔗 Drew Yeah, that's right.

1:30:28🔗 Adam Sean?

1:30:29🔗 Caller Hello?

1:30:30🔗 Adam You're 24?

1:30:31🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:30:32🔗 Adam All right, I talk too much. Now we got a prompt.

1:30:34🔗 Drew You got one minute. Go ahead.

1:30:35🔗 Adam You got chlamydia?

1:30:36🔗 Caller Yeah, well, I went to the military and I went to Thailand and got mixed up with a woman of the night there.

1:30:42🔗 Drew Nice. You didn't wear a condom?

1:30:45🔗 Caller I did, but I woke up the next morning and she was playing with it.

1:30:49🔗 Drew Playing with a condom?

1:30:50🔗 Caller No. Penis? Yeah. But so I started getting symptoms about a week later. It felt like somebody kicked me down there really about as hard as they could.

1:30:59🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:30:59🔗 Caller And my eyes got very swollen and I got, you know, strep throat and all this other stuff. And they sent me to a doctor there and he thought that I had had it and gave me medications. And none of the medications seemed to work.

1:31:10🔗 Drew Thought you had chlamydia.

1:31:11🔗 Caller Yeah. And so now I still keep to this day, like about once a month, my eyes get swollen and infected and I get that pain down there over and over.

1:31:18🔗 Drew Oh, how interesting. Well, there is something called Reiter syndrome, which is a recurrent urethral erythritis with eye inflammation. And sometimes, let me ask him this, your heels, your heels or back hurt?

1:31:30🔗 Caller Does my back hurt?

1:31:30🔗 Drew Or your heels, ankles?

1:31:32🔗 Caller No, not really.

1:31:33🔗 Drew But there is some called Reiter syndrome. You might want to talk to a doctor about that R-E-I-T-E-R, and sometimes it's kicked off by something like chlamydia. So you got to check that.

1:31:43🔗 Adam We'll be back.

1:31:44🔗 Caller Hello. This is your radio. Loveline will be right back.

1:31:51🔗 Adam Well, there you have another fabulous Loveline episode, Safely in the Ground. We'll take a little 22-hour break, and then we'll be back with more of the show.

1:31:59🔗 Caller Anybody tomorrow night?

1:32:00🔗 Drew No. Oh, my God.

1:32:02🔗 Adam Just more airplane stories. So until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying, Mahalo. I don't have a girlfriend, and no one at school likes me.

1:32:11🔗 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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