Thursday, November 9, 2000

4:26🔗 Voiceover For an adult audience, Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

4:45🔗 Adam He, oh yeah, yeah, it is Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 3108-54-4455. Dr. Drew is a board-certified physician, an addiction medicine specialist. Tonight from Bone Thugs in Harmony and many places, we have Juan G. Felicia and Layzie Bones, and we're all talking about, well, Drew, I gotta admit, I gotta start getting to the show a little bit earlier than when the show begins.

5:15🔗 Drew Be fair, you had one minute to walk in.

5:17🔗 Adam All right, but we're gonna, it's a pure interview. Not all this preparation that all these other guys have.

5:24🔗 That is real.

5:25🔗 Drew Keeping it real, Adam. Right.

5:26🔗 Adam I talked to producer Anne today and she said the guys and the girls were gonna be talking about some sort of anti-drug thing. But now, I don't think that's what we're talking about. We're talking about a tour. We're talking about a CD. We're talking about whatever you want to talk about. So go ahead.

5:43🔗 Guest Let's talk. How you guys do? First of all, man, much love to you. Showing a lot of respect for what you guys are doing here with Loveline. Giving you all a round of applause.

5:49🔗 Drew Well, thank you.

5:50🔗 Guest Much love, much love, much love, much love.

5:53🔗 Guest I missed the TV show, though.

5:55🔗 Drew I hear it's still airing here and there.

5:57🔗 Adam Oh really?

5:57🔗 Drew They're telling me.

5:58🔗 Adam I saw it when I was in New York last, and I actually saw it in LA., but it was like 2.30 in the morning and I was in a masturbatorial stupor, so I wasn't really able to focus. Although, I did get one off to you, Drew, with the sound down.

6:11🔗 Drew Don't worry about it. Thank you.

6:13🔗 Guest We're just happy to be here. Three artists working together successfully. My name is Wanjee, the Haiti boy, working with Felecia and Layzie Bone from the group Bone Thugs in Harmony.

6:23🔗 Guest That's right. Layzie Bone in the house. We come to spread that positive message and let everybody know what we're really up to in the game.

6:31🔗 Guest Let them know about what we've been doing for the last past year now. Far as Wanjee myself, I have a label distributed by Beyond and BMG with Alan Kovac right now that I just put together. Layzie Bone has an entrepreneurial situation going as well after selling 40 million records.

6:45🔗 Guest That's right. I'm working on my own thing. I got my own record company. It's called Mo Thug Records, which has sold like 45 million records right now. Felecia's album is coming out. I got a solo album coming out January 23rd and it's called Thug by Nature because that's just what I am and you know, it's going down.

7:03🔗 Adam What are we going to hear tonight? What CD are we going to be listening to?

7:07🔗 Guest Well, the CD that we're going to be listening to is called Wanjee The Royal Impression. It is stores now. The first song we're listening from the record is called What We Got What You Want. And the video is featuring Carmen Electra all over the video.

7:18🔗 Drew Oh, yes.

7:21🔗 Adam She's been in here a few times. And she looks good.

7:24🔗 Guest She's actually good. She looks good in the video.

7:26🔗 Adam She's had some hard miles on her too. And she still looks good. She's like a truck that's been driven in the Baja 1000, but doesn't have a scratch on it. You know what I mean? I'd be scared to tear the engine down and look though.

7:41🔗 Drew Come on now. There's kinder ways. She is a very nice person.

7:45🔗 Adam She certainly is, certainly is. All right, so we'll...

7:48🔗 Drew Actually, she did a webcast with me and she sort of talks about that whole period of her life as a response to her mom having died.

7:55🔗 Guest Yeah, that was very tragic.

7:57🔗 Drew Yeah, she was very close to dying, started acting out and got it back together.

8:01🔗 Adam I feel bad.

8:01🔗 Drew I hope so.

8:02🔗 Adam Drew, when are your parents going to go so you can start having some fun? Go kill your parents so you can start having a good time, would you? All right. All right, so that is what now, what about the tour? Where are you guys going to be? When are you going to be? All that stuff. Do we have tour dates?

8:21🔗 Guest Yeah.

8:21🔗 Adam Do I have those in front of me?

8:22🔗 Guest Yeah. I don't think we have actual tour. We don't have the actual tour dates right now because we're still in the interim of putting the school tour together. This school tour is going to be basically 90 cities, 90 schools and it's going to be called the Wanji Raw Lepression Tour with Layzie Bone and Felecia. What we're going to be doing is going through junior high schools and high schools from anywhere clear through the bay all the way through Miami to Miami. So it's going to be a real long tour. It's an educational tour plus we're going to be teaching kids with music classes on what's the things they need to learn about music for. It's writing, publishing, writing, just a big tour.

8:56🔗 Adam What would an average stop at an average school be like as far as a tour goes?

9:01🔗 Guest Basically, you know what I mean, just awaken them and making everybody aware how important everything is and getting that education and everything. A lot of autograph signing.

9:15🔗 Guest It's more like we take our personal reflections that happen in our life and what we try to do is we don't try to go to the schools and preach to the kids like we don't go preach but we go into the schools with who we are and hopefully the kids want to get to know who we are and things that happen in our life.

9:32🔗 Adam Is it going to be like an assembly? You know what I'm saying?

9:35🔗 Guest Yeah, it is an assembly. Kids come to the assembly room and we talk to them and keep it real with them.

9:41🔗 Adam You know that one celebrity assembly I had when I was in high school?

9:45🔗 Drew The bar marshal?

9:46🔗 Adam No, I had the guy who played LeBeau from Hogan's Heroes. LeBeau, which one was LeBeau? The little French guy from Hogan's Heroes.

9:56🔗 Drew The ballistic expert.

9:57🔗 Adam Yeah, came to speak to us about the Holocaust. You want to talk about excitement in high school? There's nothing less exciting to a 16 year old than a guy was on a sitcom that was canceled before you were born talking about the Holocaust.

10:09🔗 Guest But you got to get out of class though.

10:12🔗 Adam That's true.

10:14🔗 Guest You got to get out of class.

10:15🔗 Adam No film, but I was out of class. I spent my entire school career either cutting school, waiting for, remember the excitement of a substitute teacher?

10:27🔗 Guest Oh, that's right.

10:28🔗 Adam When a teacher other than your own teacher was there, what an adrenaline surge that was. Or as I was saying to Drew, when you'd walk into class and you'd see the film projector set up.

10:37🔗 Guest Oh yeah, it's time to kick it.

10:38🔗 Adam You'd see it and then the next move was to gauge the size of the film reel. Now maybe you guys, you guys are younger than me, you guys had VCRs and stuff like that. We had film, remember that, Drew? And you saw, if you saw a big roll, you knew you were in good shape. Drew, did you have any speakers come to your, well you went to a private school.

10:59🔗 Drew No, but no speakers. We'd have like guys that were like explorers, you know, come and talk about their adventures on the Amazon. That was it.

11:04🔗 Guest It's totally different nowadays. It's totally different. As a matter of fact, the school, what was the school? We did a school today.

11:10🔗 Guest Monte Carlo.

11:11🔗 Guest We did Monte Carlo down over there in Sherman Oaks, I think it was.

11:14🔗 Guest Van Nuys.

11:15🔗 Guest Van Nuys. It was about 4,000 kids, man. You saw when we walked into that gym, they're like, you know, so it was great. It's good.

11:21🔗 Adam Monte Carlo, is that a middle school?

11:24🔗 It's a prep school.

11:26🔗 Adam Oh, it's a prep school.

11:27🔗 Guest Yeah.

11:27🔗 Adam Yeah. Drew went to a prep school too. He went to the little Lord Fonleroy School for albino hemophiliacs. Is that true, Drew? Yeah. Okay. All right. So we're going to hear some music. We'll take some calls and we'll do all that. Sam?

11:43🔗 Yes?

11:43🔗 Adam You're 25. What's up?

11:45🔗 Caller Well, my whole life I've always had kind of vaginal dryness. And about a year ago, about a year and a half ago, I just kind of have this abundant amount of moisture down there now.

11:56🔗 Drew Maybe it's normal now.

11:58🔗 Caller Well, that was my question. This doesn't feel normal.

12:02🔗 Drew Do you just go on the pill or something?

12:03🔗 Caller No, I've never been on the pill or not on any kind of drugs.

12:07🔗 Drew No medicine.

12:07🔗 Adam So you were dry your whole life.

12:10🔗 Caller Right. And then like a year and a half ago.

12:11🔗 Adam And all of a sudden your vagina, which was like a desert, is now an oasis.

12:16🔗 Drew Tropical rainforest.

12:17🔗 Adam Tropical rainforest with the monkeys and...

12:20🔗 Caller Yeah, I could go into business with my own astral line.

12:23🔗 Adam Really? Maybe you just got with the right guy.

12:26🔗 Caller Well, I mean, I'll be walking around going through work and then...

12:30🔗 Adam Do you make noise when you walk?

12:31🔗 Drew Are you aroused?

12:33🔗 Caller No.

12:33🔗 Drew It just automatically just happens without arousal.

12:35🔗 Caller It just kind of like, you know, comes out and it's enough to even, you know, wet my clothing. And I've asked my guy and he's like, well, it's normal, but I just wanted to make sure maybe I...

12:46🔗 Drew What do you think turned it around? What changed things?

12:48🔗 Caller I have no idea.

12:49🔗 Drew Nothing else changed about you?

12:50🔗 Caller No, I mean, I've been with the same... my husband for three years.

12:53🔗 Drew You didn't gain much weight by chance?

12:55🔗 Caller No.

12:56🔗 Drew Lost a bunch of weight?

12:58🔗 Adam Yeah, it all came out of a vagina. It's all in the form of water, yeah. She looks like a prune now. Nothing left in her.

13:05🔗 Caller That's why I'm so dehydrated all the time.

13:07🔗 Adam Okay, so what's your husband think of this?

13:09🔗 Caller Well, see, that's the problem. He likes a lot of friction during sex. Yeah. Well, that kind of prohibits it. And so, you know, I have to dry off all the time. And I was like, is there a pill I can take to dry back out? Should I use cornstarch?

13:27🔗 Adam Throw some kitty litter down there and soak things up, like when you spill transmission fluid in the garage. You know, toss a little.

13:33🔗 Drew Calum, what is that stuff?

13:35🔗 Adam Yeah, I don't know.

13:37🔗 Drew No, listen, there's nothing you can do. And there's nothing you should do with this. This is normal. The gynecologist checked you out. Anatomically, you're normal. There's no infections. Just relax. And I think you'll worry a little too much about husband and his friction needs.

13:49🔗 Adam But it is true that it's such a fine line, like too dry. That ain't working at all. But too wet, you can't get a grip. You can't get a feel. You can't get it. It's like nothing. It's like humping air. It's like it's like you're screwing a swimming pool. Yeah. You ever humped a bucket of water?

14:07🔗 Drew Have you ever experienced that?

14:08🔗 Adam The wetness? No, I've never heard.

14:11🔗 Drew What you're describing is fantasy.

14:13🔗 Guest I don't think these guys are what you're crazy.

14:15🔗 Adam But you know what I'm saying though, right?

14:17🔗 Guest Definitely.

14:18🔗 Adam One minute, you're humping a piece of sandpaper. You're like getting blown by a cat or something. Then the next minute, you're humping a pail of water. It's got to be something in between. It's a very fine line. I never really thought about that. Good. Thank you. Gabriel? What's up? Gabriel, you're 23. What's up?

14:38🔗 Guest Yes, sir. I actually have a question for Dr. Drew.

14:41🔗 Guest Okay.

14:42🔗 Guest I wanted to know if there's any way that you can have or get a sexually transmitted disease by just going down on somebody but having vaginal itchiness, like itching.

14:55🔗 Drew You went down on somebody else and then you turned up with vaginal itching.

14:59🔗 Guest Well, listen, but there's more to it because I just ended...

15:01🔗 Drew That's a ridiculous show. Wait. Hold on.

15:02🔗 Guest Hold on.

15:03🔗 Drew There's more to this. Why?

15:05🔗 Guest Okay. Because I just ended chemotherapy.

15:08🔗 Drew What kind of chemo?

15:10🔗 Guest Adriumycin and ifosamide.

15:13🔗 Drew That's pretty heavy. Do you have ovarian cancer or something?

15:15🔗 Guest No. I had sarcoma. I had a large tumor in my arm. Oh, boy. And it was surgically removed, but they started the chemo just for... Oh, absolutely.

15:23🔗 Drew How long ago was the surgery? May.

15:26🔗 Guest Wow.

15:27🔗 Drew All right.

15:27🔗 Adam So...

15:28🔗 Guest I'm cancer-free now.

15:29🔗 Adam You are?

15:29🔗 Guest And I just ended my chemo Sunday night.

15:32🔗 Adam Did your hair fall out?

15:34🔗 Guest Oh, yeah. I'm totally bald.

15:35🔗 Drew Yeah. And Adri is a pretty serious stuff.

15:37🔗 Adam All right. But what's her sexual problem?

15:40🔗 Drew It's not a sexual problem. Listen, your immune system... Did you get oral thrush? Did you get yeast in your mouth, too? Yes.

15:46🔗 Guest You mean, like, right from the chemo or...?

15:48🔗 Drew Yeah, from the chemo.

15:50🔗 Guest I don't think so, no.

15:51🔗 Drew Well, typically you would. You get it in the vagina, too. Very typically.

15:54🔗 Guest Yeah. And see, I wondered about that. And I think I might have just started my period and I haven't...

16:00🔗 Drew You got to talk to your oncologist. It is a yeast infection and it is actually important that you treat it because with your immune system suppression, the chemo can actually become a more serious issue.

16:07🔗 Guest OK, because I've never actually had any actual intercourse.

16:10🔗 Drew It's just yeast.

16:11🔗 Adam In your whole life?

16:12🔗 Guest No.

16:13🔗 Drew Why?

16:13🔗 Adam Jesus, you almost died of cancer. You never got laid?

16:16🔗 Guest No.

16:17🔗 Adam Oh, man. What happened?

16:19🔗 Drew That's the difference between men and women, right? A man would run right out.

16:21🔗 Adam A man would rate the nurse while he was dying. Just to say he got one in.

16:25🔗 Guest Well, I went down when somebody died in my hospital room. Oh, I showered with somebody in my hospital room.

16:31🔗 Adam Really?

16:32🔗 Guest Yeah.

16:32🔗 Adam One hell of a doctor you got there.

16:34🔗 No, it wasn't my doctor.

16:35🔗 Who was that?

16:37🔗 Adam The doctor was like, OK, you can't pay. You don't have insurance? See if we can work it off. Jesus Christ. Wait a minute. You had sex, you gave oral sex to somebody while you were in your hospital bed?

16:50🔗 Guest No, not when I was in my hospital bed.

16:52🔗 Drew In the shower in your hospital room.

16:54🔗 Adam While you were receiving chemo?

16:56🔗 Guest Yep.

16:56🔗 Adam Geez, what a friend. What a guy. Hey, I just came to visit. How's the cancer going? How about a BJ?

17:03🔗 Guest No, but he sucked on my dick, so it was OK.

17:06🔗 Adam Oh, hold on a second. These calls get weirder every day, Drew. Every day, one minute she's a virgin who's dying from cancer, the next minute, she's some naughty nurse who's putting out in the hospital shower. The hospital shower is a good place to have sex because they got all those bars to hang on to, right?

17:30🔗 Drew You can hose the whole thing down.

17:31🔗 Adam Yeah, you can roll a whole wheelchair in there and have sex. It's not like your shower where you're banging your head up against a soap dish or something. They got handles everywhere, non-skid grip floors, benches. I mean, that's a place to get it on. Then someone comes in and mops up. You don't have to clean up. Hold on. Gabrielle? Yes, sir. All right. Let me just try to figure this out. You're a virgin, right? You got cancer. You went in, you got the chemotherapy. Who was this who came in and had this oral sex with you?

18:04🔗 Guest It was just one of my friends that I used to work with.

18:06🔗 Adam I see.

18:07🔗 Guest I mean, we're sort of more than friends, but we're not talking right now. We just had a big fight.

18:12🔗 Adam Nice. He stole some of your food while you were sleeping?

18:15🔗 Guest No.

18:16🔗 Adam What happened?

18:17🔗 Guest No, we just had some communication problems.

18:22🔗 Adam All right. He didn't feel weird about getting it on with you while you're getting the chemotherapy in the hospital?

18:28🔗 Guest No, he didn't.

18:29🔗 Drew No problem. We'll move the catheter aside and all that.

18:32🔗 Guest It sounds really bad, but it really wasn't.

18:34🔗 Guest It was okay.

18:35🔗 Drew Let me ask you this. Did you say you've been Christine and Adriamycin?

18:38🔗 Guest Adriamycin, yes.

18:39🔗 Drew And what was the other one?

18:40🔗 Guest Iosemite.

18:42🔗 Drew Iosemite. Okay. Listen, Adri, you know about the heart problems with that, right?

18:47🔗 Guest Heart problems?

18:48🔗 Adam No, don't freak her out.

18:49🔗 Drew Well, just be aware.

18:51🔗 Adam All right, listen. What is this chemo? That's where you poison, right?

18:54🔗 Drew Yeah, those are heavy.

18:55🔗 Adam Radiation is radiation. And then chemo is basically put poison in your body and try to kill the cancer. And those are some big poisons. And so it kills the cancer, but it sort of kills you a little bit, too, right? Right.

19:07🔗 Drew The idea is to rapidly divide cells and get more killed.

19:10🔗 Adam So your hair falls out and your colon gets diarrhea, that kind of thing. Oh, man. But he's in the... I can't believe the guy came in for BJ while she was lying there on death's doorstep.

19:22🔗 Drew Something tells me there's much more to get out of this story.

19:24🔗 Adam I don't want to know. Derek? Derek, you're 23.

19:28🔗 Caller Hey, what's happening?

19:29🔗 Adam What's up?

19:30🔗 Caller I just want to ask Layzie, man. When is the next time all five of you guys are going to be in the video together? Are you releasing another song from the Resurrection album or are you just doing something else?

19:40🔗 Guest No, really what we're doing is we're about to release a DVD of the making of the Resurrection album and we'll show how we all work together on the album. You know what I mean? We won't have an actual new video with all five members because Flesh and Bone was recently incarcerated. You probably read it in the paper and all that.

19:59🔗 Caller I got his album. Tell him props on that one. I got that one. I like that one.

20:02🔗 Guest Much love. His new album just came out. It's called Let Loose Fifth Dog. Spread it out. Let the world know. You know all your friends and everything. Go pick that up. It's all good.

20:13🔗 Caller One more question I have for you is, Bizzy did a song with Tupac called Confessions. Why that wasn't released or do you not know? I heard it already though. It's a tight stroke. I want to know why it wasn't released at all.

20:26🔗 Guest I mean, you know, because Tupac had like 50 million songs when he passed away, you know what I mean? It was some things going on with more records and everything and they was going through their litigations and everything and it caused the song not to come out. But you know what I mean, it's a good song and eventually it came out. So, you know what I mean, that's probably how you got a chance to check it out.

20:46🔗 Caller Right. All right. Well, much love to Moe Thug, Felecia, all you guys. Adam and Drew, keep it up, man.

20:51🔗 Guest Thanks, Derrick.

20:53🔗 Adam Take care of yourself.

20:53🔗 Drew I'll keep it really in.

20:54🔗 Adam Jim?

20:55🔗 Yeah.

20:56🔗 Adam You're 15, what's up?

20:57🔗 Caller I was circumcised and when I get erection, the head doesn't come out.

21:03🔗 Adam Yeah.

21:03🔗 Drew Something new or it's always been that way?

21:04🔗 Adam It's always been that way. Yeah. You were supposed to have a bigger penis. You got the large skin and the small penis.

21:11🔗 Drew No, no, no. He got the small skin, the big penis.

21:14🔗 Adam No, the head doesn't come out.

21:16🔗 Drew It won't fit out.

21:17🔗 Adam No, I think it won't make it. His penis looks like a char-pay dog.

21:20🔗 Drew Oh, one quick.

21:22🔗 Can you...

21:23🔗 Adam Wearing a turtleneck.

21:24🔗 Drew Can you peel it down? I mean, if you pushed it down, will the head pop out or it absolutely will not come through? It will come out?

21:30🔗 It's going to stay very well.

21:32🔗 Drew All right. The problem is it happens when it will not come out. That's called stenosis and it can tear and be a big mess.

21:36🔗 Adam Yeah, but this isn't...

21:38🔗 Drew This doesn't reach through.

21:39🔗 Adam Okay, but let me ask you, if the hole in the uncircumcised foreskin is too small for the head of the penis to come through, yet the penis wants to come through, it will start bananning?

21:49🔗 Drew Bowing.

21:50🔗 Adam It will bow? Really?

21:53🔗 Drew Whatever. It will hurt, tear, all kinds of things.

21:54🔗 Adam And then you have to do like a pesiotomy in your foreskin? You just make a little slit and get it out of there? Oh, my God. All right, but Jim, that's not your problem, right? You have too much skin, not enough dork, right?

22:07🔗 Yeah, or the other way around.

22:08🔗 Drew Otherwise, commonly, the clinical term will be the Shar-Pei syndrome.

22:11🔗 Right.

22:12🔗 Adam All right. So hopefully, the rest of your penis will grow and catch up to the skin, right?

22:16🔗 Drew You got a few more years to go.

22:18🔗 All right, then.

22:18🔗 Drew Yeah, you got five more years.

22:20🔗 Adam All right, Jim. Good luck with that. Oh, don't worry, though.

22:24🔗 Drew Keep it clean, keep it clean, keep it dry.

22:25🔗 Adam Chicks love that uncircumcised penis. Right. Okay. Yeah, they're scared of it. Chicks are freaked out. You ever hear girls talk about it?

22:32🔗 Yikes.

22:33🔗 Adam All right, he'll be fine. He's 15. Andrea?

22:36🔗 Yes?

22:37🔗 Adam You're 19. What's up?

22:39🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

22:39🔗 Guest I have an opinion, actually.

22:41🔗 Adam You have what?

22:42🔗 Guest I have an opinion.

22:43🔗 Adam All righty.

22:44🔗 Guest Well, see, I'm married to my ex and we're not together. I'm just helping him out with his papers.

22:50🔗 Adam Wait a minute, wait a minute. You're married to your ex?

22:53🔗 Guest Yeah. He asked me to do him a favor.

22:55🔗 Drew Your ex-boyfriend? Ex-boyfriend?

22:57🔗 Guest Yeah, my ex-boyfriend.

22:58🔗 Adam You married him to keep him in the country?

23:00🔗 Guest Yeah.

23:01🔗 Adam I see.

23:01🔗 Guest And, Ashley, when you do someone a favor, they're supposed to be really good to you.

23:06🔗 Drew No. Not somebody who's a criminal and asks you to engage in their criminal activities with them.

23:10🔗 Adam Where is he from?

23:11🔗 Guest He's from Morocco.

23:13🔗 Adam Morocco?

23:14🔗 Drew Yeah.

23:14🔗 All right.

23:16🔗 Adam Does he wear a fez with a tassel hanging off of it?

23:20🔗 Guest No, he wears no real clothes, but his mom does.

23:23🔗 Adam Yeah, that's funny. I just wish everyone would dress in their stereotypical garb, because it's always funny. Everyone wears some sort of United Nations thing. All guys from Morocco wear fez. That way you know. All right. So you keep him in the country, and now he's not doing what for you?

23:40🔗 Guest I mean, well, he's my first love, and that's why I married him to help him out, to prove to him I might have loved him.

23:45🔗 Drew Oh boy.

23:46🔗 Adam Sure.

23:46🔗 Drew That's a bad thing.

23:47🔗 Guest Yeah. Then he keeps treating me like crap.

23:50🔗 Drew Yeah. Well, he didn't marry you because he loves you. He married you to-

23:53🔗 Guest For the papers.

23:53🔗 Drew Yeah. That's it.

23:54🔗 Guest In doing this, I thought he'd see how much I loved him.

23:56🔗 Drew Oh, please.

23:58🔗 Guest I was wrong. I know I was wrong.

23:59🔗 Adam No. What is he doing out here?

24:02🔗 Guest I don't know. I don't even know what a point of him being here is, but-

24:07🔗 Adam All right. Well, so what do you want to do? Are you living? Do you live with him?

24:11🔗 Guest We used to live together, but then we had to be separated because I couldn't afford to pay rent where we were staying with. Well, with the guy we were staying with.

24:18🔗 Drew You were paying rent?

24:19🔗 Yeah.

24:20🔗 Guest I had to pay rent.

24:21🔗 Adam Well, wait a minute.

24:21🔗 Drew For both of you?

24:22🔗 Yeah.

24:23🔗 Guest And he couldn't afford it.

24:24🔗 Drew Where did you learn that your job in life is to be a doormat?

24:28🔗 Caller What?

24:29🔗 Caller Probably from my mom.

24:30🔗 Adam Your mom taught you that?

24:31🔗 Drew What did your mom do to you?

24:33🔗 Guest She kicked me out when she found out I was married. She doesn't want to support me.

24:38🔗 Drew Why do you have such a low self-esteem? Why do you feel so crappy about yourself?

24:41🔗 Caller Why?

24:42🔗 Guest I'm getting stronger now.

24:43🔗 Drew Yeah, but all right, fine. From zero to a scale of one, the scale of a hundred, you made it up to one.

24:50🔗 Adam What nationality are you?

24:52🔗 Caller I'm Greek.

24:54🔗 Adam Where's your dad?

24:55🔗 Guest I don't care.

24:56🔗 Adam I don't know. There we go.

24:58🔗 Drew What's the deal with him?

24:59🔗 Guest I don't know. He's a loser. He's a psycho.

25:01🔗 Drew Why?

25:01🔗 Caller What happened?

25:03🔗 Guest He has problems. I haven't seen him in a couple of years.

25:06🔗 Drew What did he do to you?

25:08🔗 Guest He made me sit there in a room for three hours, twice a day while he talks crap about my family. I got tired of that and he used to force me to eat.

25:18🔗 Drew Force you to eat?

25:20🔗 Guest Yeah, force me to eat.

25:20🔗 Adam What, like stuffed grape leaves and all that bad Greek food?

25:24🔗 Drew Yeah, like, yeah.

25:25🔗 Adam Kebabs and stuff?

25:26🔗 Guest Yeah, and I used to barf and then he used to like yell at me and send me to my room.

25:31🔗 Drew He'd force you to eat until you threw up.

25:33🔗 Guest Yeah.

25:34🔗 Adam No, hold on a second.

25:36🔗 Guest I know.

25:36🔗 Adam He forced you to eat bad Greek food?

25:38🔗 Guest Yeah.

25:39🔗 Adam Yeah. That's abuse. That's worse than sexual abuse.

25:43🔗 Drew What's not abuse? That's torture.

25:45🔗 Adam Yeah, that's what that is. Yeah. All right, so where is he now?

25:49🔗 Drew Lamb.

25:50🔗 Oh, my dad?

25:51🔗 Adam Yeah.

25:51🔗 I don't know.

25:52🔗 Adam Is he from Greece?

25:54🔗 Yeah, he's from Greece.

25:54🔗 Adam What's his name? Just because it's going to be funny.

25:57🔗 Walt. Walt.

25:59🔗 Adam What is it?

25:59🔗 Drew It's the third time you see-

26:00🔗 Caller It's Walter, but we call him Walt.

26:01🔗 Drew Third time you failed at that one.

26:03🔗 Adam Yeah. I thought guys from Greece were named like Mustapho and stuff, like bizarre names.

26:08🔗 Guest Yeah, I know.

26:09🔗 Walt.

26:10🔗 Adam That's why they threw him out of Greece.

26:12🔗 Guest I know, right?

26:12🔗 Adam A guy named Walt living in Greece. It's confusing to the tourists. Listen, wait a minute. Listen, Andrea, your dad's an A-hole, right? And so therefore, you pick A-holes to hang out with.

26:26🔗 Drew You're the person that loves the A-holes.

26:28🔗 Adam You found another guy who's as big a A-hole as your dad to kick you around. So can you stop doing that?

26:33🔗 Guest Yeah, I've already done that. I mean...

26:35🔗 Drew Leave this guy and find somebody worthwhile.

26:36🔗 Guest That's what I'm trying to do.

26:37🔗 Drew Alright, there you go.

26:38🔗 Guest Because, like, first of all, he put me on punishment. He called me up last night, like, you're on punishment for getting drunk and leaving those two messages on the answering machine.

26:47🔗 Drew Yeah, he's not in your life anymore. I thought you left him.

26:49🔗 Guest No, I'm going to leave him.

26:50🔗 Drew Alright, well, it doesn't matter what the hell he says. You're out.

26:52🔗 Adam Alright, please. Okay, don't get pregnant. Do you hear me?

26:56🔗 Guest Oh, no, I'm not going to get pregnant, no.

26:57🔗 Drew And it's not that there may be an alcohol issue here, too.

27:00🔗 Guest What?

27:00🔗 Drew There may be an alcohol issue here, too.

27:02🔗 Guest Oh, yeah, I was drinking, supposedly.

27:04🔗 Adam You do. But Moroccan guys don't drink. They smoke opium.

27:07🔗 Drew She does.

27:07🔗 Caller I mean, I don't.

27:10🔗 True.

27:11🔗 Adam Right? I know what all the nationalities do. I know all their drugs. Moroccan guys, they don't drink, but they smoke opium. Right? Drew, you could break it down.

27:20🔗 Drew I'll just name a country. Azerbaijan.

27:22🔗 Adam Azerbaijan? Crank. Am I right?

27:26🔗 Drew Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

27:27🔗 Adam Thank you.

27:28🔗 Drew Poland.

27:29🔗 Adam Big good game show. Poland is a hard liquor, but clear hard, hard liquor like vodka and gin.

27:35🔗 Drew And what's the stuff they drink up in Norway?

27:38🔗 Adam Ouzo. That's what they drink in Greece. That'd be a good game show. You name the nationality and you connect the drug with the nationality. See, like black guys, you guys, you don't do like ecstasy. Hell no. That's not your thing.

27:52🔗 Guest No, we don't do mushrooms.

27:54🔗 Adam No, no, no. You don't do any of that stuff. Be too weird.

27:58🔗 Guest It's too weird.

27:59🔗 Guest Brothers don't do that.

28:00🔗 Adam No, that's...

28:01🔗 Guest But hey, what's up, babe? This is Won-G. Pull it together though, all right? Pull it together, girl.

28:05🔗 Adam All right. We're going to take ourselves a little break. We'll be back right after this. Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. He is Dr. Drew over there. Juan G, Felicia, Layzie. Layzie Bone are all here. We are gonna hear something off of Juan G's newer CD, The Royal Impression, pretty soon. I think we got a song picked out.

28:59🔗 Drew End of the second, yeah.

29:00🔗 Adam All right.

29:01🔗 Guest Yeah.

29:01🔗 Adam And these guys are going around, all around the country, going to schools, talking to kids, playing, right?

29:12🔗 Guest Performing, playing, meeting and greeting, just keeping it real all the way around. You know what I mean? Giving back to the people what they get us, man, you know, on the realest level of the game.

29:20🔗 Guest Yeah, because without the youngsters supporting Juan G and Layzie Bone, none is gonna happen in Felicia. So we know that we gotta go out there and sometimes you have to be personable where people could actually meet you and touch you and get a chance to see you in the flesh. You know what I'm saying?

29:33🔗 Adam That is my policy too, except for I want 10 grand for every college I go to.

29:38🔗 Drew And you don't want to have to get out of bed to go there.

29:40🔗 Adam No, I'd like to do a cast from my hotel room via speaker phone.

29:45🔗 Drew If you have to get on a plane or a vehicle of any type, you're pissed. Hey listen, I know you love publicists too. Remember Anne Israel?

29:51🔗 Adam Yes.

29:52🔗 Drew These guys are publicists.

29:53🔗 She got married.

29:54🔗 Drew Look at her name.

29:55🔗 Adam That was your publicist too, right? Anne Corolla.

29:59🔗 Anne Corolla.

30:00🔗 Drew Is it a little close to home there?

30:01🔗 Adam Yes.

30:02🔗 Guest No, she's the greatest. No, Corolla is the greatest. I'm not trying to be my publicist, but she's the best and she's the greatest at working with an artist and you know, much love to Dr. Drew for putting it down for us and everything. But Anne, we love you if you're out there listening, boy.

30:16🔗 Guest Yeah, yeah, she's a beautiful, beautiful person. Much love, Adam.

30:19🔗 Adam Ryan. She's actually, she's not listening, she's out spending the money Drew gave her when Drew had her as a publicist, right, Drew? Ryan?

30:27🔗 Yeah.

30:28🔗 Adam You're 22.

30:29🔗 Caller Right.

30:30🔗 Adam What's up?

30:31🔗 Caller Yeah, I got a question for Dr. Drew. Yeah. I have an eight-month-old son and his mother, she married a child molester. And I was just curious, what would be the signs of a sexual...

30:46🔗 Drew Well, I'm kind of curious what he means, she married a child molester.

30:50🔗 Adam Well, they had a kid and then they broke up and then her mom...

30:54🔗 Caller No, we were never together. It was a one-night stand.

30:56🔗 Drew All right. How do you know this guy's a child abuser?

30:59🔗 Caller How? Well, he's being investigated right now for another molestation and CPS got called into it.

31:06🔗 Drew How old is the child that he abused?

31:08🔗 Caller How old is the child that he abused?

31:10🔗 Drew That he allegedly abused.

31:12🔗 Caller That he went to jail for was 11 years old.

31:14🔗 Drew Okay, well...

31:15🔗 Caller And the one he's under investigation for now is, I believe, three.

31:20🔗 Adam She's a dynamite. Now, what were you doing with this chick? You just met her at a bar or something?

31:24🔗 Caller No, I was drunk and convenient.

31:27🔗 Adam I see. Well, at least I had part of the booze equation, right?

31:31🔗 Caller Well, Ryan...

31:31🔗 Adam You knocked her up and she wanted to have the kid. And you have some kind of joint custody or something?

31:37🔗 Caller No, no custody through the courts or anything.

31:40🔗 Adam Do you see your child?

31:41🔗 Caller Yeah, he is mine. He lives with me because CPS placed him with me.

31:46🔗 Drew Because this guy was lurking around?

31:48🔗 Caller Yeah, because he's under investigation right now. We'll see what it is. He had a yeast infection, my son. And I took him to the doctor and explained to the doctor about the situation of her and her husband. And he said that we had to call CPS.

32:04🔗 Drew Oh, good.

32:04🔗 Adam Well, wait a minute. The way you would give a child a yeast infection is by molesting them somehow?

32:10🔗 Drew Not necessarily. I mean, is it a female child?

32:13🔗 Caller No, male.

32:14🔗 Drew Male child. So, is that an genital yeast infection or where?

32:16🔗 Caller Yeah.

32:17🔗 Drew Well, not necessarily anything.

32:19🔗 Adam Oh my God, this is a nightmare. Can't you just hire a drifter to kill this guy?

32:24🔗 Caller Yeah, I'd like to.

32:25🔗 Adam I mean, Jesus Christ. What is up with this chick? Well, her dad must have molested her or something, right?

32:32🔗 Caller I have no idea.

32:33🔗 Drew For sure. For sure, that's what happened.

32:34🔗 Adam Okay. Can you talk to her and appeal to her sensibilities as a mother?

32:40🔗 Drew He's got the kid now.

32:41🔗 Adam I know, but she's going to have some contact with this kid.

32:44🔗 Drew Yeah, but it's going to be supervised contact.

32:46🔗 Adam All right.

32:46🔗 Drew Listen, the deal, I hope anyway, Ryan, the deal is the kids that get abused will exhibit all kinds of bizarre behavior, but typically sort of precocious sexual kinds of behaviors.

32:56🔗 Adam No, but the kid's eight months years old. What do you want them to do?

32:58🔗 Drew Right. I mean, it's very unlikely.

33:00🔗 Adam Everything's a sexual behavior when you're an infant. Everything goes in your mouth. Your hand is constantly on your penis. I mean, it's all sex. Well, what can you do?

33:10🔗 Drew No, whatever happened has happened. I doubt there's anything serious by eight months.

33:14🔗 Adam When do child molesters molest normally? What do you think the prime age is for a kid? Four, five?

33:21🔗 Drew Six to eight.

33:22🔗 Adam Six to eight? What can you do with an eight-month-old?

33:24🔗 Drew Right, exactly. It's bizarre that people do weird stuff with them.

33:28🔗 Adam And can't we just kill those people? I mean, when, you know what I mean? At what point, at what point do you just become unfixable?

33:36🔗 Guest You should be able to kill them all, man, because I just had a new baby, and I couldn't imagine being in a position like that, you know what I mean? I say, you know, we erase them all. Take them all off the planet, and I say, dude should keep his baby away from that whole situation, bottom line.

33:53🔗 Adam I'm fine with that, by the way. Mike, you're 16. What's up?

33:57🔗 Caller Yeah, I was wondering if it's wrong to masturbate with oranges.

34:03🔗 Adam What? What are you doing with these oranges?

34:08🔗 Caller Cut them open and microwave them and stick it in there.

34:13🔗 Adam Hold on, slow down. Let me write this down. How long in the microwave?

34:16🔗 Caller About 10 seconds.

34:17🔗 Drew Full power?

34:18🔗 Caller Yeah.

34:18🔗 Adam Yeah, 10 seconds. And then, so you warm up the orange. Yeah. And then what?

34:26🔗 Caller Then just full round of it.

34:29🔗 Adam Listen, man, can't you like hump a bean bag chair or something? I mean, what are you, stuck on a desert island? You know what I mean?

34:38🔗 Drew You got wise with a honeydew.

34:39🔗 Adam I never screwed a honeydew melon. That was a joke. Please, how dare you bring that up in front of our guest? I heard someone talk about putting a hole in a honeydew melon and putting it in the microwave, but I never tried that, and if I did, it was a gag in high school, please. Mike?

34:56🔗 Drew How many times?

34:57🔗 Adam A hundred and forty times. How often do you, wait a second, now. And by the way, do you have an orgasm? Yeah. With the orange juice dripping and everything?

35:09🔗 Caller Yeah.

35:09🔗 Adam That's like an orange whip or an orange Julius when you're done with it, isn't it? Oh my god, if your parents ever saw this, they'd kill themselves. Now, listen, seriously, what do you do? You put your penis in a hole in the orange?

35:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

35:25🔗 Adam And so you leave the orange hole?

35:27🔗 Drew Yeah.

35:27🔗 Adam And what about that, Drew? Is vitamin C good for the penis?

35:31🔗 Drew I worry all that acidic fluid would irritate the urethra, even the skin.

35:36🔗 Adam Yeah. How about that?

35:37🔗 Drew You better stay with the melons.

35:38🔗 Adam Yeah. Stay with melons.

35:40🔗 Caller All right.

35:41🔗 Adam Lower acidic acid, right? All right.

35:44🔗 Drew Hey, Mike, just cool out a little bit. You all right otherwise?

35:47🔗 Caller Yeah.

35:47🔗 Drew You sure?

35:48🔗 Caller Yeah.

35:49🔗 Drew Not doing drugs or?

35:50🔗 Caller No, not usually.

35:51🔗 Adam Would you recommend he would do some drugs? I mean, we don't tell too many people to do drugs, but Mike, maybe you ought to stop screwing produce and do some drugs.

35:59🔗 Drew It's not exactly the most reassuring reaction when he said, I don't do it all the time. I'm not doing it now.

36:04🔗 Caller Weed once in a while.

36:05🔗 Drew Yeah. Once in a while. Right. Yeah. Every day except Monday?

36:09🔗 Guest Yeah.

36:09🔗 Adam You got to be high to screw an orange. Don't you, Mike? Mike, how about you get a girlfriend?

36:15🔗 Caller Yeah, I got one.

36:17🔗 Guest You do?

36:18🔗 Caller Yeah.

36:19🔗 Drew Does she know that you engage in these acts?

36:21🔗 Caller Huh?

36:22🔗 Drew Does she know that you engage in these behaviors?

36:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

36:25🔗 Adam She does. She's proud of you.

36:26🔗 Caller Yeah.

36:27🔗 Okay.

36:27🔗 Adam I don't believe you, Mike.

36:29🔗 How does he?

36:30🔗 Adam He sees 16. Oh, what a goofball. This is ridiculous. Drew, we got to quit this job. It's humiliating.

36:37🔗 Drew It is humiliating. Let's listen to a song.

36:39🔗 Adam All right. We're going to hear something from Wanji.

36:41🔗 Guest Yeah.

36:42🔗 Adam You queued up there, Anderson? Yeah. Okay.

36:45🔗 Guest What's up? I want everybody to hear this. This is Wanji, the Haiti Boy Royal Impression, with Layzie Bone, I'm out in the stores right now. Peep this one out. This one's going out to Alexis Vogel, Tommy Vogel, just giving y'all love. Thanks a lot. Check it out. We got what you want.

40:38🔗 Caller Yeah.

40:39🔗 Guest YGZ.

40:40🔗 Guest YG, y'all better go pick that up.

40:42🔗 Adam The Royal Impression, everybody.

40:44🔗 Guest That's right.

40:44🔗 Adam Go out and get that so one can get another watch. With more diamonds on it. Drew, you don't even have a watch, do you?

40:52🔗 Drew No, but I just got one yesterday from Cartoon Network.

40:55🔗 Adam Fantastic. Yeah.

40:56🔗 Drew It's awesome. I'm just keeping it real.

40:59🔗 Adam Yeah. Made out of real tin foil.

41:01🔗 Drew It's a Kenneth Cole. Awesome.

41:03🔗 Adam It's not worth anything. Why did they give you that?

41:05🔗 Drew I did some stuff for them.

41:07🔗 Adam I've done stuff. I never get any watches.

41:09🔗 Drew You probably got paid. Oh, yeah.

41:11🔗 Adam You didn't get paid? I guess they gave me watch money. They didn't give me a watch. But the joke's on them because I didn't buy a watch with the money. All right. Let's take one more call before we go to break.

41:22🔗 Drew By the way, what did you do for Cartoon Network?

41:25🔗 Adam I'm the voice of-

41:26🔗 Drew That's not Cartoon Network. It's Disney.

41:28🔗 Adam All right. I'm the voice of Buzz Lightyear's Commander and the Buzz Lightyear cartoon. That's a cartoon.

41:36🔗 Drew It's not Cartoon Network.

41:36🔗 Adam It'll end up on Cartoon Network in about 10 years.

41:40🔗 Hello?

41:41🔗 Adam You're 25. What's up?

41:42🔗 Caller Hey. How are you guys doing? Good. I need help.

41:47🔗 Good. Doctor, do you have ulcerative colitis?

41:50🔗 Drew Uh-huh.

41:50🔗 Adam You have what?

41:51🔗 Drew Ulcerative colitis.

41:52🔗 Adam What's that?

41:53🔗 Drew It's an inflammatory bowel disease. Your colon becomes severely inflamed. In fact, in the old days, we used to take the colon out when people got that.

41:59🔗 Adam Really?

42:00🔗 Drew Yeah. Anybody want the usual stuff now?

42:02🔗 Caller Like mesalamine and stuff like that?

42:04🔗 Adam Steroids. Hold on. In the old days, you take the colon out and then what?

42:08🔗 Drew You build a... You get a bag and they built something called a Koch's pouch, which is a sort of a reconstruction of a little bladder where your poo comes out of now as opposed to your rear.

42:16🔗 Adam Outside of the body?

42:18🔗 Drew The bladder is inside. It's a little like internal pouch and a little spigot.

42:22🔗 Adam And so that's where it comes out, like a soft swirl?

42:25🔗 Drew Now it just comes off a liquid.

42:27🔗 Adam It now comes out like liquid?

42:28🔗 Drew Like liquid on a bag.

42:30🔗 Adam Yeah. I could tell you, I could go for that.

42:34🔗 Drew The bag?

42:34🔗 Adam I don't want to gross people out.

42:36🔗 Drew You don't like the inconvenience of sitting down on your throne a couple of times a day?

42:39🔗 Adam I was on the toilet tonight, I swear to God. And you know, like one out of every 25 cramps you take, you'd wipe down there with some toilet paper. It's like never ending skid mark on the toilet paper. It's like after half a roll of toilet paper, you go, what's going on? Whose crap's coming out of my ass? Where's this coming from? This coming from somewhere else.

43:03🔗 Drew He's losing his mind back here.

43:04🔗 Guest That's my dad. That's my dad, he's cracking up.

43:08🔗 Adam But it's weird, your ass is weird because it's like a roulette wheel. You never know, like sometimes you take a crap, you wipe your ass, you look at the toilet paper, you go, there's nothing there.

43:19🔗 Caller Oh my goodness.

43:20🔗 Adam I'll use this toilet paper again, I'll blow my nose into this, there's nothing on it.

43:24🔗 Caller There's nothing.

43:25🔗 Adam Don't even smell.

43:27🔗 Where'd the crap go?

43:29🔗 Adam Yeah, there's nothing there. And then sometimes you take a crap and it's like, you wipe, you go, okay, I'm gonna get another piece, you wipe, I don't want to freak people out, but I expired the roll and there was two gym socks sitting in front of me. What am I gonna do? I went for the gym sock as this sort of the final mop, but I thought, I thought to myself-

43:51🔗 Guest Soak it real good first?

43:54🔗 Drew This was peanut butter.

43:55🔗 Adam No, I did throw the gym sock into the shower, though, when I was done. This is back there livin. You know, because what happened was is, while I was wiping my ass with the long end of the tube sock, the other end was floating in the toilet, so when I pulled it out, it was hangin and drippin everywhere, so I just tossed it into the shower. You know, the maid will get that one. But, I mean, you guys know what I'm talkin about, though. Once in a while, once in a while.

44:21🔗 Drew As you've described yourself, a burlap phase.

44:24🔗 Adam I got hair down there. It's like tryin to get peanut butter out of a shag carpet down there. It's not easy to clean up. But if it just came out of the side...

44:34🔗 Drew So for you, with the Santa Claus mouth action goin there, it's especially, especially sort of convenient.

44:42🔗 Adam I think I may have this operation, is what I'm sayin.

44:45🔗 Drew You could save...

44:47🔗 Adam Could I have this operation if I didn't have this condition? You will.

44:50🔗 Drew In your case, we could make an exception.

44:51🔗 Adam Is it such a bad thing to be able to just wipe yourself on the side?

44:55🔗 Drew It's very attractive.

44:55🔗 Adam First off, I can't see what's goin on. I don't know where my hand is. I don't know if I'm wiping. My balls are tucked up in there. I don't know what's goin on. I'm feelin around. Sometimes you miss a spot. Here, you know exactly where you were.

45:08🔗 Drew That Ilium just pouches right out, puckers out.

45:11🔗 Adam Yeah. No problem at all.

45:12🔗 Drew Very, very attractive.

45:13🔗 Adam All right, all right. We're gonna talk more about this after the break. We'll be back.

45:18🔗 Hello, this is your radio. Loveline will be right back.

45:56🔗 Adam It's Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew, Felecia, Layzie Bone and Juan G are all here tonight.

46:03🔗 Guest What's up America? Giving you love, what's going on? What's up Alexis Vogel, Tommy? I love y'all. My people double M, my mom, Mama P.

46:12🔗 Guest Yeah, Mama P, we are more thugs. You know what I mean, the five T's in the house.

46:18🔗 Guest You mortal thugs, everybody man, I love your show, man, I'm crazy about your show.

46:21🔗 Adam Oh, thanks.

46:22🔗 Guest This is, I'm telling you, this is the, no hype, no brag, but I've been a lot of places, man, I've never bumped into two guys like, yeah, you guys are off the hook. Howard Stern ain't got nothing on y'all.

46:32🔗 Adam Well, thanks.

46:33🔗 Guest Howard Stern ain't got nothing on y'all. Yeah.

46:35🔗 Adam Well, we don't get too many compliments on this show.

46:38🔗 Drew Yeah, no.

46:39🔗 Adam Once in a while, I drop a compliment.

46:41🔗 Drew Yeah.

46:41🔗 Guest But that's about it.

46:42🔗 Drew Not to yourself, not to me.

46:44🔗 Adam No, no. Thank you.

46:45🔗 Drew Rarely both of us get a compliment.

46:47🔗 Adam Yeah. So we do appreciate the love.

46:49🔗 Guest But it's real, man. It's real. I remember when I first heard about the show, my brother Double M told me about this show. Then my mom told me about the show and I was like, and then I started seeing it on TV and I really got into it on television. I want to see it come back. You know what I mean?

47:03🔗 Adam Well, we will find a home for it and then we will invite you to it.

47:07🔗 Drew Yes. That's for sure. Hey, listen, we didn't finish with Lynn though. We only got a couple minutes. All right, Lynn with the ulcerative colitis. All right, Lynn, look what you did. Lynn.

47:16🔗 Hello.

47:16🔗 Drew Look at what you started. Lynn, there you are.

47:23🔗 Hello.

47:23🔗 Drew Hi, Lynn.

47:24🔗 Caller Oh, I'm sorry. My cell phone is going crazy.

47:26🔗 Drew Look what you started there with Adam.

47:28🔗 Caller I know. Actually, it's the first time I've ever heard my disease sound funny. So thanks for that.

47:33🔗 Adam Thank you.

47:36🔗 Caller Well, my dilemma is a couple of weeks ago when I had my colonoscopy.

47:42🔗 Drew Right. Oh, Lynn. All right. That phone is screwing up. All right. Hang on.

47:49🔗 Adam Oh, Drew. I want to talk to her off the air. Lynn, the phone is in worse shape than her colon. Lynn.

47:56🔗 Caller Hello. Go ahead.

47:57🔗 Drew You had a colonoscopy.

47:58🔗 Caller Okay. I had a colonoscopy a few years ago. They found polyps at the tail end of my colon right towards the rectum. Right. So that kind of like squashed all anal sex possibility. Why?

48:09🔗 Adam Why?

48:10🔗 Caller I don't know. I was scared because, I mean, they were bleeding polyps.

48:13🔗 Drew Yeah. But you've got ulcerative colitis. You bleed anyway.

48:15🔗 Caller Right. Okay.

48:16🔗 So-

48:17🔗 Drew People with ulcerative colitis get polyps. That's why we take the colon out.

48:21🔗 Caller Right. But listen, I'm excited because two weeks ago, I had a sigmoidoscopy.

48:26🔗 Drew You were clean.

48:27🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:28🔗 Drew And now you're under treatment. You weren't treated then. And the treatment will help suppress the polyp formation.

48:32🔗 Caller Exactly. So does that mean I can have anal sex if I don't have the polyp?

48:36🔗 Drew This is commitment, right?

48:37🔗 Adam Yeah. It's like somebody said they had throat cancer. They had a tracheotomy and they went to their husband to have sex in the hole they breathe in in their neck. Jesus, Lynn, this is a slap in the face to the Almighty. You understand? You just dodged a bullet here. God said he's going to let you off without the cancer, without having to have the colon removed. And now you want to slap in the face by engaging in anal sex? Please.

49:02🔗 I've never tried it.

49:04🔗 Drew Oh, man.

49:05🔗 Caller I mean, I'm in all seriousness, I'm very serious about this.

49:09🔗 Drew Here's the deal. First of all, if you have active UC at the time, no way, okay? You can cause anal fistulas and all sorts of things. Have you ever had any fistulas and things?

49:18🔗 Caller No, but I know what you're talking about.

49:21🔗 Adam You guys ever had a fistula in your ass? It hurts, man.

49:24🔗 Drew Okay, so that's one concern.

49:25🔗 Adam Especially when they're wearing that kind of watch.

49:27🔗 Drew Secondly, if the colon is inflamed, it's even more likely to absorb or be exposed to blood-borne pathogens like HIV, like hepatitis, that kind of thing. So absolutely have to wear a condom if you doesn't. Wait a minute.

49:36🔗 Adam Let me ask you this, Drew. If you have a bag and you're going to the potty in a bag, can you still have sex with the anus?

49:47🔗 Drew It depends how much they leave behind there. They try to take most of it with UC because the rectum-

49:51🔗 Adam I don't need much. I just need the opening.

49:53🔗 Drew Yeah, you'd be okay probably.

49:54🔗 Adam I think I can make it.

49:55🔗 Guest Yeah.

49:56🔗 Drew But the average male might-

49:57🔗 Adam Would you feel it?

49:59🔗 Drew You'd come up against the end, yeah.

50:00🔗 Adam I mean, but if you were the recipient of the anal love, would you feel that area? Would it get irritated and stuff?

50:06🔗 Drew Yeah.

50:07🔗 Adam But it actually would be good because it wouldn't be any poo down there, right?

50:10🔗 Drew It's like after a hysterectomy or something, just a blind sack.

50:13🔗 Adam Right. It's like the ultimate orifice.

50:15🔗 Yeah.

50:15🔗 Adam But you have anal sex without the danger of getting poo on your pee, right?

50:21🔗 Caller Yeah.

50:24🔗 Adam All right. This show is really taking a turn for the worst. It really has. We're going to take ourselves a quick break and then we'll be back for a good long segment.

50:34🔗 Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline.

51:18🔗 Adam It is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191-1G. Felecia and Layzie Bone are all here tonight. The royal impression is 1G's CD that we will... Well, we're gonna hear more off of that.

51:34🔗 Guest That's right.

51:35🔗 Adam I would imagine before the night is true. Drew, you all right? Everything good? Ready to go forward here, everybody? Julie?

51:43🔗 Caller Oh, hi.

51:44🔗 Adam Hey, you're 27. What's up?

51:46🔗 Caller First off, I just want to say you guys are awesome. I listen to your show all the time.

51:49🔗 Adam Thanks.

51:50🔗 Caller Very stimulating and informative.

51:52🔗 Drew Great. Listen to Adam talk about tube socks and poo.

51:55🔗 Caller Yeah, that was very educational.

51:58🔗 Drew By the way, where is that rescue toilet seat you have?

52:02🔗 Adam Oh, you mean the one that sprays water at my ass?

52:04🔗 Drew Yeah.

52:05🔗 Adam That's upstairs. I was downstairs. You guys see these toilets? Yeah. You guys ever stayed at a nice hotel that has a toilet seat that squirts you in the ass? Yeah. I got one of those at home.

52:16🔗 Guest I got one of those at home too, but I ain't never used it.

52:18🔗 Adam You don't use it? You should treat yourself to it.

52:21🔗 Guest It's nice. Never.

52:22🔗 Adam It's good.

52:23🔗 Guest Never.

52:25🔗 Drew We were at the Paris Hotel in Las Vegas this weekend, and Susan goes, hey, there's a bidet in here.

52:29🔗 Adam She leans over it, hit her right in the face.

52:31🔗 Drew Right in the face.

52:32🔗 Adam Julie?

52:33🔗 Caller Yeah.

52:33🔗 Adam What's up?

52:34🔗 Caller Okay. I had breast implants about eight months ago, and for the last six months, I've been experiencing some, not too bad, minor back pain, but been getting worse. And I've been getting these really bad migraines. I'm wondering if the two could be correlated.

52:49🔗 Adam Well, what size did you go to?

52:51🔗 Caller D. Nice rack.

52:53🔗 Adam Why'd you go D?

52:55🔗 Caller Well, I was a C before. I guess just to feel more attractive.

52:59🔗 Adam What do you do for a living?

53:01🔗 Caller Well, I work in sales.

53:02🔗 Adam All right. So you want to sell more stuff.

53:04🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah, I guess.

53:06🔗 Adam Yeah. Did it work?

53:08🔗 Caller No, not really.

53:09🔗 Adam There you go. Now, I would have bought more stuff for me. Are you selling stuff to guys?

53:16🔗 Caller No, actually, I sell. Well, I don't really want to say.

53:19🔗 Drew What kind of things do you sell?

53:22🔗 Caller Tools.

53:22🔗 Adam Really? What kind of tools? I love tools.

53:26🔗 Caller Yeah, I really don't want to get into a lot of detail.

53:27🔗 Adam Come on. What kind? Woodworking?

53:30🔗 Caller No, like mechanics tools.

53:31🔗 Adam Yeah. Do you do any snap-on tools?

53:34🔗 Caller No, I don't. My husband does. No, I'm just kidding.

53:37🔗 Adam All right. So what's up? So now you've got these big boobs that are hurting your back.

53:42🔗 Caller Yeah, I'm wondering if it could be related to the boob job.

53:45🔗 Drew Oh, absolutely. I mean, that's the main reason that women get the reduction is back pain, neck pain. And if it's pulling across your shoulders, they'll get into your neck, and that neck spasm can get up into your scalp, and then you get headaches, too.

53:55🔗 Adam Do they? Really?

53:57🔗 Drew Oh, absolutely.

53:58🔗 Adam But it's a small price to pay for the big boobs, isn't it?

54:01🔗 Caller Uh, yeah.

54:02🔗 Adam Yeah, what? Can you feel the extra weight?

54:05🔗 Caller Uh, no, my back gets really tight. And I get these really, it gets so tight, I get these really bad migraines, so I can't stomach food.

54:12🔗 Drew Mm, boy. Maybe you need a different kind of bra. Have you thought about that?

54:16🔗 Caller Well, I don't, I don't wear a bra, so.

54:18🔗 Drew Uh, maybe you ought to start wearing a bra, get some support. Maybe you want to, uh, get some physical therapy or even massage therapy.

54:24🔗 Adam What are you doing? Are you selling tools over the phone? Who's not buying more tools from you with these D cups and no bra? Well, I didn't.

54:32🔗 Caller I just had a baby about three years ago.

54:34🔗 Adam Yeah?

54:35🔗 Caller And, um, I guess I just did it because I was not satisfied with my body. It wasn't, you know, to sell tools or anything. It was just why I was not satisfied with my body.

54:44🔗 Right.

54:44🔗 Adam But what I want to know is, is can you feel a significant weight increase from the implants?

54:51🔗 Well, yeah.

54:52🔗 Adam So that's what's probably doing it.

54:53🔗 Guest Yeah, of course.

54:54🔗 Yeah.

54:54🔗 Adam It's like, listen, if, if all of a sudden, like you've been walking around the way you walk around your whole life, and all of a sudden somebody strapped a 10-pound weight to your chest, and you walked around the way you walk around, at the end of the day, I'm guessing your back would hurt.

55:08🔗 Guest Do you think Dolly Parton has that same problem?

55:10🔗 Adam Well, she was used to it, I think.

55:13🔗 Drew Or he had big, I don't know.

55:14🔗 Adam Are those implants? Huge implants? How do you know, Drew?

55:19🔗 Drew Classics, hers and a friend of mine.

55:20🔗 Adam Oh, really?

55:21🔗 Guest That was a lot of implants.

55:24🔗 Adam She did it early, right?

55:25🔗 Drew She's had multiple revisions apparently. Oh, really?

55:28🔗 Adam I think Drew's got a little inside line here. But the point is, I guess she's used to it?

55:34🔗 Drew No. Well, she just does whatever she got to do.

55:36🔗 Adam Maybe she's in a lot of pain.

55:37🔗 Caller Yeah. Who knows?

55:38🔗 Adam I mean, look at her. She's always singing about pain. She looks like she's in pain. All those country singers are singing about something horrible. Tornadoes and people, coal mines collapsing.

55:49🔗 Guest The horse ran away.

55:50🔗 Adam Horse is running away into the coal mine. Maybe she's in a lot of pain. Maybe she did that so she could write songs. Maria? You're 16?

56:03🔗 Caller Well, she made a mistake. I'm 15.

56:04🔗 Adam Okay. What's up?

56:06🔗 Caller I had a comment for Layzie Bone.

56:08🔗 Guest What's happening?

56:09🔗 Caller Is that okay?

56:10🔗 Guest It's cool. What's going on?

56:11🔗 Caller Hey, baby. How are you?

56:14🔗 Guest I'm fine. How are you doing?

56:16🔗 Caller I'm fine.

56:18🔗 Caller I just want to tell you, man, keep on doing what you're doing.

56:21🔗 Guest Oh, yeah. We're doing our thing. You know what I mean?

56:24🔗 Caller Yeah.

56:24🔗 Guest YRN TV.

56:25🔗 Guest Hey, look, we're doing a little radio internet show, too. Also, from 10 to 12 on Sundays, you can log on to it. It's called You Radio Network. You can log on to it at yrn.tv.

56:36🔗 Guest For to use by to use.

56:37🔗 Guest For to use by to use. Check it out. You know what I mean? We got a lot of interesting things going on. Probably not. It's just about as interesting as they kicking it.

56:45🔗 Adam Listen, we're going to do an extra boring show on Sunday, so all you people can log on to that and enjoy that. Maria, where are you calling from?

56:53🔗 Caller I'm calling from San Diego.

56:54🔗 Adam Are you guys going to be getting out that way?

56:56🔗 Guest Yeah, Wanji and Layzie Bone's definitely going to be getting out that way. We're going to be in the Mission VAO area, the Oceanside, Escondido area. We're just out there doing something with Jammin Z90 or something like that. So we've been out there. We love San Diego because, you know, they got a lot of love and all the teenagers down there are really great.

57:14🔗 Caller I love you guys.

57:15🔗 Guest You love us, huh?

57:15🔗 Guest I love, baby. Support that album. Come on January 23rd. Flesh and bones album out too.

57:20🔗 Guest Go get that Mo Thug CD, the Wonji Roll Impressions. There's a lot in the stores and plus it's great music and, you know, we're just trying to keep it going.

57:27🔗 Caller Yeah, I've been listening to you guys since I was 13.

57:30🔗 Caller And the reason for that is because I used to like this guy named Marcelino. Yeah, and he got me into you guys.

57:36🔗 Adam Oh, Marcelino. Sure, we know of his work. He's out in San Diego?

57:40🔗 Caller Yeah, he's my husband.

57:41🔗 Adam Yeah, Marcelino from San Diego. Oh, Marcy. Yeah, Marcy. Yeah, good kid. Yeah, tell him we said hi.

57:47🔗 Caller Oh, okay. All right. Yeah, and like I kind of tend to do things when I look at your pictures.

57:56🔗 Adam What kind of things?

57:57🔗 Caller I ain't going to lie.

57:58🔗 Guest What kind of things?

58:00🔗 Caller You know, I kind of tend to kind of...

58:06🔗 Adam Yeah? Really?

58:07🔗 Caller I feel weird telling you this, but I have, man, I have to tell you.

58:11🔗 Adam Layzie Bone?

58:12🔗 Guest Well, I'm glad we can keep you motivated. You know what I mean? Somebody got to do it.

58:16🔗 Caller Keep you motivated.

58:18🔗 Adam Yeah, this wasn't part of their, let's get back to school program, but you know, I mean, interest is interest.

58:24🔗 Caller Yeah, like you guys are fine as hell.

58:27🔗 Adam All right. Thank you. Are you doing okay in school? You're keeping your grades up? You're doing all that stuff?

58:32🔗 Caller Yeah.

58:33🔗 Adam All right. Good.

58:34🔗 Caller But I had a question for Drew, too.

58:37🔗 Adam You got a picture of him?

58:40🔗 Drew That neutralizes the effect of.

58:42🔗 Adam That's right.

58:44🔗 Drew What's that?

58:45🔗 Caller Like when I was like 12, I pierced my own nipples, right?

58:48🔗 Caller Oh boy.

58:51🔗 Caller Yeah. And I was wondering like, there's the same size as they were, and my mom was like a double D, okay?

58:59🔗 Drew Yeah. When you put a rod, a spear through the nipple, it's a sign for the breast to cease growth.

59:06🔗 Adam Yes. It has stopped. No, he's kidding. Why? You're not as big as your mom is?

59:10🔗 Caller No.

59:11🔗 Adam Your mom's 245 pounds, right?

59:14🔗 Caller She is not. My mom is very nice looking.

59:17🔗 Adam Really?

59:18🔗 Caller Yeah.

59:18🔗 Adam Single lady?

59:19🔗 Caller You want to touch it? No.

59:21🔗 Adam Is she big gal or she's?

59:22🔗 Caller No, she's thick. She has a big booty and big boobies.

59:26🔗 Adam Okay. But do you have a big booty too?

59:29🔗 Caller I have a big booty but my boobies.

59:30🔗 Adam Oh, no boobies. Oh, that's a tough combo.

59:32🔗 Caller Yeah. I have boobies but it's like, you know, they look at my mom and they look at me like, what happened?

59:37🔗 Adam You know? Well, stop hanging out with your mom.

59:40🔗 Caller No. Man, they think we're sisters and everything, so.

59:43🔗 Adam Alright. So listen, you're 15 years old.

59:46🔗 Drew You're fine. You got a little time to go here.

59:47🔗 Adam Give your boobies a little chance to grow, right? Relax.

59:48🔗 Drew Relax.

59:49🔗 Caller Okay. Why is this a question?

59:51🔗 Drew It's a revival question but you got to your 18, 20 before you're done growing.

59:55🔗 Caller Okay. So I'll probably.

59:57🔗 Adam You'll be fine.

59:58🔗 Drew No, you can't say that but you'll.

1:00:00🔗 Adam Well, how does that work? How do the boobs work?

1:00:02🔗 Drew I'm not sure there's a real pattern to that.

1:00:04🔗 Adam But there's a better chance of you having bigger boobies if your mom has bigger boobies, right? I would think so.

1:00:08🔗 Drew I would think. But I don't know that for a fact.

1:00:11🔗 Adam It seems to work that way. Yeah. I'm gonna have to. What about penis? I'd like to check my dad.

1:00:18🔗 Drew You come from the mom's dad.

1:00:19🔗 Adam Give him a good ass-kick. You son of a bitch. Didn't send me to college now, this? You bastard. Is it? Is the penis? You think? I don't get my penis from my mom's side, do I?

1:00:32🔗 Drew Mom's dad.

1:00:33🔗 Adam My mom's dad? Now look into him.

1:00:35🔗 Drew I don't know that.

1:00:36🔗 Adam All right. All right. What about the Brillo head? What about the hair? You don't know where that comes from?

1:00:42🔗 Drew These things are very complicated. They're not like the sweet pea.

1:00:45🔗 Adam I want to know who to blame. That's all I'm saying. Sam?

1:00:50🔗 Caller Yeah, what's up?

1:00:51🔗 Adam What's up?

1:00:52🔗 Caller My question is for Adam.

1:00:54🔗 Adam Yes.

1:00:54🔗 I want to know if it's mandatory for me to go down on my girlfriend.

1:00:58🔗 Adam To go down on her? Yeah.

1:00:59🔗 Drew Yes.

1:01:00🔗 Adam Yes. You have to do that. That's the only way she'll have an orgasm.

1:01:04🔗 Caller Even if she doesn't go down on me?

1:01:06🔗 Drew Yes.

1:01:07🔗 Adam Well, that's a good way to get her to go down on you. You know what I mean? That's the way I look at it.

1:01:14🔗 Drew At least you have a point of negotiation at that point.

1:01:17🔗 Adam Yeah. You got something. Yeah.

1:01:20🔗 You have leverage.

1:01:21🔗 Adam Yeah. You got a leg to stand on. By the way, when you go down on someone, you're saying, come on, go down on me when I'm done. Isn't that what you're saying?

1:01:32🔗 Fair exchange.

1:01:32🔗 Adam It's sort of like when you give someone a massage. You're basically saying, you're going to give me a massage. Say it. Why won't she go down on you?

1:01:40🔗 Caller Well, it takes me a while to go.

1:01:43🔗 Adam But she gets tired down there?

1:01:46🔗 Yeah.

1:01:47🔗 Adam Well, how long does it take you?

1:01:49🔗 At least eight or nine minutes.

1:01:52🔗 Adam Yeah. That's a lifetime when you're blowing someone though.

1:01:55🔗 What if I just finger bang her and I don't go down on her?

1:01:58🔗 Adam Well, let me ask my attorney about that. We have to figure that out.

1:02:02🔗 Drew They're all tied up down in Florida right now.

1:02:04🔗 Adam Oh, I see. Yeah. We have to get back to you on that, Sam. Sam, just go down on her. Don't turn sex into some sort of stalemate where you're not going to do this because she's not doing that and I'll be goddamn if I'm going to do this when she's not putting that out.

1:02:17🔗 Drew It shouldn't be about technicalities.

1:02:20🔗 Adam No, you both try to please each other and everyone's a winner, right?

1:02:23🔗 Drew He's trying to make a case for it. Technically, I've done my job.

1:02:27🔗 Adam Right. Yeah.

1:02:28🔗 Drew That's ridiculous.

1:02:29🔗 Guest And this is Won-G telling you something. Respect your lady. If she wants to do it, then she'll do it. I think it should be her option. You know what I'm saying? Just let it ride.

1:02:36🔗 Adam But the best way to get someone to do something is to have them want to do it.

1:02:42🔗 Guest That's right.

1:02:43🔗 Adam Not to corner them or to beat them on a technicality.

1:02:45🔗 Guest Or try to push their head that way.

1:02:46🔗 Guest Then you get a good job.

1:02:48🔗 Guest Or try to push their head that way, stuff like that.

1:02:50🔗 Adam Right. That's a last case for short. I agree with Won-G. I mean, you only do that when you ask nice. You don't get it, right? You got it. What are you going to do? Right. I mean, that dinner wasn't cheap, right? You know, you do tell me your policy in college. I know you're with me. Macy.

1:03:08🔗 Guest Hi.

1:03:08🔗 Adam You're 22.

1:03:09🔗 Guest Yes.

1:03:10🔗 Adam What's up?

1:03:11🔗 Guest Okay. When I was 10, I was molested and when I was 16, I was raped. After that, having like being intimate with like my boyfriend or whatever, when I would make love with like when I would try to like make love to them, because I'm passionate, I guess, and I would like instead of having like sex, you know, like trying to make love to them, and then I would just find it like that instead of trying to make love to them, I would like it rough. Yeah. The sex was fake, you know.

1:03:41🔗 Adam Who molested you?

1:03:44🔗 Guest I don't know. I was in Mexico and it was some guy. I don't even know who it was.

1:03:47🔗 Drew Well, when sex, what's been sort of wired into your circuitry is a violent act. That becomes the way you deal with sexual feelings. And it can be hard to undo that sometimes. It becomes sort of a hardwired fact of your sexual response to this.

1:04:02🔗 Adam What was the rape? Violent?

1:04:04🔗 Guest Yeah. That was when I was 16.

1:04:07🔗 Drew Yeah. And of course, you know, it's really a recurrent acting out of the victim role. That's what you're doing. That's how you get in touch with your feelings or yourself as a sexual being is by becoming that victimized child again.

1:04:20🔗 Adam You know, the thing that's ironic about this is it only works as it pertains to sex in relationships, meaning if you're a kid and you almost drowned in a pool, you don't want to go near a pool.

1:04:32🔗 Drew That's right.

1:04:32🔗 Adam But if you're a kid and someone gets violent with you later on, you need that violence, even though you despise it. You need it. I mean, it I don't know if you want it, but you need it.

1:04:44🔗 Drew What you tend to act out repeatedly are more the things that other people do to you. When it's about things that happen to you and other inanimate objects, you sort of deal with it and you avoid it, or you become a dog bite to either avoid it or you become a veterinarian.

1:04:58🔗 Adam Right.

1:04:58🔗 Drew You deal with it.

1:05:00🔗 Guest Adam, I have a question. Sweetheart, this is Won-G. Let me ask you, do you have a boyfriend right now?

1:05:04🔗 Guest No, I don't.

1:05:05🔗 Guest No boyfriend? Okay. That's all I wanted to know.

1:05:08🔗 Guest Well, my question is if I like it, would I ever be able to get over it? Like if I be in Timo with someone?

1:05:12🔗 Drew Yeah, you can. Are you sexually compulsive at all?

1:05:15🔗 Guest Well, after that, after like being raped and everything, yeah, I did.

1:05:19🔗 Drew Is there addiction in your family somewhere? Alcoholism?

1:05:23🔗 Guest No.

1:05:24🔗 Drew Well, there's an organization called the National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity that does actually a website, ncsac.org, and you can get some referrals and some groups. The 12-step kinds of models really do work very well for sexual compulsivity. There's the SA, Sexaholics Anonymous, has got a book called the White Book that's very instructive, helps you understand where some of this compulsivity comes from. I suggest you get involved with that. That is the best way to deal with these sorts of experience.

1:05:56🔗 Adam Hey, Macy, you're Mexican, right?

1:05:58🔗 Guest No.

1:05:59🔗 Adam Oh, what were you doing in Mexico?

1:06:01🔗 Guest We were, I don't know, I was very young, my parents were there. I guess we were like on vacation or something.

1:06:08🔗 Adam You were vacationing in Mexico and somebody molested you?

1:06:11🔗 Guest Yeah, he was in a car and I don't remember much. I just remember being in a car.

1:06:15🔗 Adam Right, and then you got raped once after that?

1:06:18🔗 Guest When I was 16.

1:06:19🔗 Adam Right. You know, do you like your dad?

1:06:22🔗 Guest My dad and my mom have been divorced for like forever now.

1:06:25🔗 Adam How's your dad? Do you like him?

1:06:28🔗 Guest Yeah, but you know.

1:06:29🔗 Adam Did he ever beat on you?

1:06:30🔗 Guest No, he never.

1:06:31🔗 Adam Alright. You don't sound, I mean, you've been through some but we've heard worse.

1:06:36🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:06:37🔗 Guest Because the thing is that I hear that women who get raped usually shut down, make sex.

1:06:42🔗 Drew No, they establish what we call trajectories. They either go towards shutting down and being averse to sex or really becoming hypersexual or going back and forth between the two.

1:06:52🔗 Adam How usually?

1:06:53🔗 Drew Hypersexual, then they meet Adam and they become shut down.

1:06:55🔗 Adam They shut down. That's right. I catch them during what I call the dormant sex period and then they become hypersexual later on with my friends.

1:07:01🔗 Drew Right.

1:07:02🔗 Adam All right. So, Macy?

1:07:03🔗 Drew Yes.

1:07:04🔗 Adam All right. You got some work to do.

1:07:05🔗 Drew Check out Essay, really.

1:07:06🔗 Adam You can do it.

1:07:07🔗 Drew Check out Essay. You'll be a lot happier.

1:07:08🔗 Adam Okay. Thanks a lot. All right. And just listen, you know what you're doing, right?

1:07:12🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:07:13🔗 Adam All right. So don't do it.

1:07:14🔗 Caller I know.

1:07:15🔗 Guest I haven't. I haven't been in it for a while.

1:07:17🔗 Adam Okay. Good. You're fine. You'll be good. Oh, all right. Everything's good. Enjoy. Enjoy. At least you got your colon. You're not crapping in a bag. Here's what I want everyone to do tonight. If they could just get one thing from this show. Count your blessings. Everyone do this. Five times a day, I want everyone to do this no matter what's going on. The girlfriend's coming down on them, the boyfriends are coming down on them, their folks are coming down on them, the school teachers coming down on them. Life doesn't seem good. They lost their cell phone. Whatever's going on, the car broke down, whatever it is. I want you to stop wherever you are and go, at least I'm not crapping into a bag. Just stop and say that to yourself. At least I'm not crapping into a bag.

1:07:55🔗 Guest Can you feel that lazy?

1:07:57🔗 Adam Yeah, I mean like you're pulled over, the cops write you a ticket, you think it's the end of the world, and you just stop and say, at least I'm not crapping into a bag.

1:08:05🔗 Drew And then remember Adam who's going to have electively that procedure.

1:08:08🔗 Adam Who's going to be the first person in US history to electively have the bag crapping procedure done so he doesn't have to go through another gym site.

1:08:17🔗 Drew To bypass Santa's mouth.

1:08:19🔗 Adam I think my maid's going to chip in for half the cost of it. I got to get that thing out of the shower. John? Oh. It's in the shower. What was I going to do? It was dripping. It was hanging in the toilet. I don't know what to do with it. John, you're 17. What's up?

1:08:33🔗 Caller I got a question. Me and my girlfriend, she was doing oral, she was giving me a head for about 40 minutes.

1:08:38🔗 Adam 40 minutes?

1:08:40🔗 Caller 30, 40 minutes. She wasn't very good at it. No kidding. She was trying to give me a hand job. Then we started having sex, and I ejaculated in like three minutes. I just wanted to know if that's normal or not.

1:08:52🔗 Drew It's normal to be aroused, and then when you're very aroused, it finishes quickly.

1:08:57🔗 Adam 40 minutes. Eventually, don't you just burrow a hole in the back of someone's head? Penis eventually just stick out from the back of their skull after a half hour of oral sex. Eventually, wouldn't you eventually work its way through?

1:09:12🔗 Guest Driller.

1:09:13🔗 Drew It's an erosion.

1:09:14🔗 Adam Yeah. I mean, 30, 40 minutes oral sex. Listen, if I combined, I don't think I have 40 minutes in my life.

1:09:21🔗 Caller It wasn't 40 straight, we would break off and then she'd do it again, you know.

1:09:25🔗 Adam Oh, I see.

1:09:26🔗 Drew Just relax, John. Relax.

1:09:28🔗 Adam You couldn't, and then she'd give you the hand.

1:09:30🔗 Drew You're 17.

1:09:31🔗 Adam I don't think the hand's that good. I don't like the hand. You don't like that hand, do you, John? No, because my thing with the hand job is, my hand is like, my hand, you know, my masturbatory hand is like looking at the chick's hand going, come on. That ain't the way we do it. Sometimes my hand starts talking. This bitch don't know what she's, shut up, shut up. Let her focus. Well, why? She's fat. Don't talk, don't listen to the hand. My hand knows. You, your hand cannot, I mean, it's nice when someone's giving you the hand because it's the thought of the hand.

1:10:06🔗 Drew While she's doing it, Adam gets Señor Wences up on the side. That's right.

1:10:09🔗 Adam It's all right. It's all right. I put a little lipstick on there. I go, listen, my hand needs to talk to your hand. First you need to spit and get a little gription. Then you go for the pine tar rag. That's my move. I could go for that rag like I'm in the on deck circle.

1:10:24🔗 Drew My lover likes me a lot, but sometimes I'm scared because he's very active. He gives me oral sex. I just give him the hand.

1:10:32🔗 Adam That's my favorite Drew drop. All right. Let's see if we can take another call here. Penny, you're 21. What's up?

1:10:40🔗 Caller I have these little lumps in my pelvic area. The line right where my leg meets my torso.

1:10:47🔗 Drew Okay. How big are they?

1:10:50🔗 Caller It seems to be either two of them or one elongated one.

1:10:52🔗 Drew But they're down under the skin, deep, right?

1:10:54🔗 Caller Yeah, very deep.

1:10:55🔗 Drew Give me sort of an inch. Were they like maybe a half inch by two inch? Half inch by one inch?

1:11:00🔗 Caller Well, if it feels like the two of them, because maybe it's bulbous or something.

1:11:04🔗 Drew Well, they're lymph nodes. Those are the inguinal lymph nodes.

1:11:07🔗 Caller Okay. Well, they're not very big.

1:11:08🔗 Drew And they're on both sides. Yeah. They're on both sides.

1:11:10🔗 Caller Half an inch wide.

1:11:11🔗 Drew They're normal. Most people have four or five of them down there, particularly when you're young and when you're sexually active.

1:11:16🔗 Adam So what, are they inflamed?

1:11:18🔗 Caller No, they're not red at all.

1:11:19🔗 Drew No, no, no, no. They can become inflamed. They become very active when people get herpes and something called lymphogranuloma venerium, where you can get these very large chancroid, and these things called buboes.

1:11:29🔗 Adam Buboes.

1:11:30🔗 Drew Lands can actually develop to the so big they burst open out of the skin. Lots of good STDs out there you guys don't know about.

1:11:36🔗 Adam Buboes. That's not an STD. That's like a Cuban stripper's name.

1:11:40🔗 Drew Buboes.

1:11:41🔗 Adam Welcome to the stage.

1:11:42🔗 Caller Buboes.

1:11:44🔗 Drew That's where the term bubonic plague came from.

1:11:47🔗 Adam Oh really. Do you have those limp nodes everywhere?

1:11:50🔗 Drew Well there are chains of nodes.

1:11:51🔗 Guest Can guys get that too?

1:11:53🔗 Drew Buboes?

1:11:54🔗 Guest That buboes.

1:11:55🔗 Drew Oh yeah. Absolutely.

1:11:57🔗 Adam Yeah but you don't tell your buddies you got buboes because they think you're saying blue balls. They're not going to understand it. So Drew you have limp nodes everywhere.

1:12:05🔗 Drew Well they're in chains. They're in different areas. Do you have a question about something?

1:12:08🔗 Adam No I don't know. I always thought they were under your neck.

1:12:10🔗 Drew Well that's where there's a cervical, anteroposterior cervical chain. They're all over the place there.

1:12:15🔗 Adam Alright so you just got the buboes.

1:12:18🔗 Drew No no you just got regular little lymph nodes.

1:12:19🔗 Adam Yeah you're fine Penny.

1:12:20🔗 Drew Will they go away?

1:12:21🔗 Caller Will they stop being inflamed or whatever?

1:12:23🔗 Drew Well if they're inflamed, are you having any discharge or irritation in the vagina?

1:12:26🔗 Caller No not at all.

1:12:27🔗 Drew In your legs? Anything going on? Any sores or anything?

1:12:29🔗 Caller I noticed how sore my leg was when I would bend it or sit for too long and felt these.

1:12:35🔗 Drew Well you might want to have the doctor take a look at you just to make sure it's not something because that's just a sign of inflammation in that area and although they're normal.

1:12:44🔗 Caller Check for some kind of pelvic something.

1:12:46🔗 Adam Do you have your gynecologist look at that?

1:12:48🔗 Drew Any doctor can do but just the fact that...

1:12:49🔗 Adam The regular doctor is right in the vagina there. He can't look there.

1:12:52🔗 Drew He can get the vagina if he wants.

1:12:54🔗 Adam Do you see a lot of vaginas your doctor? Really? Really? Nice. Older chicks? Older? Yeah. Real old. What's the oldest vagina you've seen, Drew? I'm sorry. 78?

1:13:05🔗 Drew I'm sure 80s.

1:13:06🔗 Adam 80s? 80s vagina? That's got to be rough. Seeing an 80s vagina is like seeing a Ferrari that's just been out in the rain, left out, sitting in a barn, you know, with once in great shape, you know?

1:13:19🔗 Drew I saw the M3Z Roadster tonight.

1:13:21🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah, that's a nice car.

1:13:24🔗 Caller $300,000.

1:13:25🔗 Adam That's a new vagina. That's not an old vagina. Drew, seriously, you've seen an 80-year-old vagina?

1:13:30🔗 Drew Yeah, many.

1:13:30🔗 Adam How old was the person it was attached to? Same age?

1:13:33🔗 12.

1:13:36🔗 Adam That's interesting. It's an 80-year-old vagina on a 12-year-old girl, huh? Yeah, that's rough. Oh, no, it can happen. In this country, are you kidding? My penis is in its 60s, mid-60s. My penis, well, you've seen my penis.

1:13:49🔗 Drew No, your penis is four.

1:13:51🔗 Adam Oh, please. How dare you? How dare you bring up my four-year-old penis? All right, we will take... Drew, what was the problem with the 80-year-old vagina?

1:14:01🔗 Drew I take care of lots of older folks. Right. They need regular help screening and stuff, too.

1:14:05🔗 Adam That's got to be rough, though, when they start talking about the vagina. Isn't that a nightmare? An 85-year-old woman comes in there and starts talking, and I got some itching and some discharge and some yeast. And Drew is going, oh, Christ, not the vagina.

1:14:19🔗 Drew Your youth focus.

1:14:20🔗 Adam Doc, I'd like you to look at something.

1:14:22🔗 Drew Remember, you're going to be old too soon.

1:14:24🔗 Adam I know. But I'm going to examine young vagina when I'm old. That's my plan. Do you see what I'm saying? I think that's all guys' plans. Not to examine old vagina when you're young, but to examine young vagina when you're old.

1:14:36🔗 Drew You've been having a plan about examining vagina since you were in high school.

1:14:39🔗 Adam Yes. It's always been my dream to examine vagina.

1:14:42🔗 Guest So far, Zippo.

1:14:44🔗 Adam What does an 80-year-old vagina look like? Is it all right? Yeah. Who knows what goes on in the old vagina, the old vagina, the old vagina. This is my rap song. All right. We will take ourselves a little break. Drew, you're going to try to get the picture of that old vagina out of your head during the break? Yeah. We'll be back after this.

1:15:05🔗 Caller Hello? Is this Loveline?

1:15:06🔗 Call 1-800-LOVE-191. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.

1:15:44🔗 Adam Yeah, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Next week, Vertical Horizon is going to be in here. They were just in here not too long ago, right? David Allen Grier.

1:15:57🔗 Drew He was not long ago. James Marsha, wasn't he here?

1:16:01🔗 Adam Well, who knows?

1:16:02🔗 Drew Are you going to be on TV with us?

1:16:04🔗 Adam Oh, I can't even remember. Whatever. David Allen Grier, he busts my balls every time he comes in.

1:16:10🔗 Drew Maybe not this time.

1:16:11🔗 Adam You don't think so?

1:16:12🔗 Drew We'll see.

1:16:13🔗 Thank God for Dr. Drew.

1:16:15🔗 Caller Not Dr. Adam.

1:16:16🔗 Adam I don't see a doctor in front of your name, Mr. Big Mouth. Two hours of being paraded by David Allen Grier coming up next week. But a nice guy. We enjoy having him in here. Juan G, Felicia, and Layzie Bone are all here tonight. We're going to hear something else off the Royal Impression, I think, this break. Well, we'll take a call and then we'll hear something else off it.

1:16:38🔗 Caller Where we go?

1:16:39🔗 Adam Leon?

1:16:40🔗 Yeah, how's it going, guys?

1:16:41🔗 Adam You're 23. What's up?

1:16:42🔗 Caller I think I've got you guys figured out. I think I figured out you guys are thick.

1:16:46🔗 Adam Who?

1:16:47🔗 Caller You guys. You too.

1:16:48🔗 Adam All right. Go ahead.

1:16:49🔗 Caller Hurry, though. Here's the deal. Here's the deal. You guys, anyway, I could call in and say I stubbed my toe. Your main question will be, well, how do you get along with your father? Did he drink a lot of alcohol? And as far as Dr. Drew, I could say I had a toe surgery. And the next thing I hear from Dr. Drew, well, what kind of painkillers did he take? What dosage of Vicotin? You guys, honestly, I think you guys watched a few of those shows on cable. You guys have no more knowledge about anything than I do.

1:17:14🔗 Drew Huh. That's interesting. I run a recovery program and I practice medicine all day.

1:17:18🔗 Caller You guys are fooling nobody.

1:17:19🔗 Drew Come on now.

1:17:19🔗 Adam What do you do, Leon?

1:17:21🔗 Caller I lounge around my house listening to you guys.

1:17:22🔗 Adam There you go. All right. Where are you calling from?

1:17:25🔗 Caller Detroit. Wawawaw.

1:17:26🔗 Adam All right. Thanks for calling, I think. And Leon, listen, if I really, truly thought I had no more knowledge than you do, I would kill myself tonight. I really would. I'd drive right off the freeway on the way home.

1:17:37🔗 Caller Adam, to go off on more tangents, the show would be a little bit better, because I don't think you go off the scene of the show unopted enough.

1:17:43🔗 Adam Well, thank you. Now he's kissing ass. Listen, I talk about everything on this show, except for the show half the time, but the program director always yells at me, tells me to take more phone calls. So I'm torn, Drew. Where are we?

1:17:55🔗 Shut up, damn it!

1:17:56🔗 Adam That's what he yells at me when we go into his office. All right, let's take one more call.

1:18:00🔗 Drew Yeah, a real call.

1:18:00🔗 Adam I want to hear something from the CD. There we go. Is that, oh boy.

1:18:04🔗 Drew Anise? Anise?

1:18:05🔗 Adam I sure hope it's anise.

1:18:07🔗 Caller Anise.

1:18:08🔗 Adam Anise?

1:18:08🔗 Caller Anise.

1:18:09🔗 Adam Anise. Okay, that's a real call, Drew. You go to a guy named Anise. You are an asshole.

1:18:15🔗 Drew I'd rather hear the Insane Clown Posse. Just hear some drops.

1:18:18🔗 Guest My real name is Peter.

1:18:20🔗 Adam I see, but your friends call you Anise?

1:18:22🔗 Caller Yeah. Wow! Right.

1:18:25🔗 Adam All right, my friends used to call me Douchebag.

1:18:27🔗 Drew I want to hear the Insane Clown Posse's joke.

1:18:29🔗 Caller All right.

1:18:30🔗 Adam Okay. Listen, Anise.

1:18:32🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:18:33🔗 Adam Hold on. Do you actually have a question? You're just making an answer yourself, Anise.

1:18:37🔗 Caller I'm making an answer myself.

1:18:38🔗 Adam All right. Drew, listen.

1:18:39🔗 Guest The only way I live is my own, my big fat ass every day when I wake up. That was pretty good. My fat ass. Oh my God. Hey, play that again.

1:18:50🔗 Adam Oh my God. You guys know the Insane Clown Posse?

1:18:53🔗 Drew Oh man.

1:18:55🔗 Adam Yeah. Violent J. He's a strange cat.

1:18:59🔗 Drew I liked him.

1:18:59🔗 Adam I had a good time with him too, but I understand why certain people have a problem with him. That's all I'm saying.

1:19:06🔗 Guest Hump the hell out of her butthole, man.

1:19:08🔗 Drew Oh yeah, that part.

1:19:09🔗 Guest I forgot about that. All right.

1:19:09🔗 Adam It was two hours of that. Let's hear another cut off the Royal Impression.

1:19:13🔗 Guest This one here about to listen to is Layzie Bone and Won-G. It's called If You Want to Ride. This one's going out to Tre'Lane. Alexis Vogel, I love you and Tommy. The whole family, the Mothe Thugs, Double M, Rick, Louis, Sean, Warren, Holden, Pops. Just everybody at Beyond BMG. Just giving you guys love. Keep this one out, Felecia, all of us. You know what I'm saying? We just one big family. Don't give up on me. Keep riding with Won-G.

1:19:36🔗 Guest If you want to ride, let's ride.

1:19:38🔗 Caller Ride.

1:22:52🔗 Guest Hey, yeah, yeah, that was called If You Want A Ride. That goes out to my heart, Alexis Vogel. I love you, baby, for sticking in there with me, man. I love you. You know what I'm saying? I just love all my family. I love everybody because a lot of people went through a lot with 1G. I love Layzie Bone for sticking with me. Just everybody, you know, and it's just a special night to be up here and chilling with two fine fellows like y'all. Y'all crazy talking about anus and everything on the radio.

1:23:14🔗 Adam We did dedicate at least an hour to a nice show to the anus. Let's see if we can stray away from the anus and move over to Desray. Desray, you're 23?

1:23:25🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:23:26🔗 Guest What's up?

1:23:27🔗 Caller Okay, well I just have a question actually. I've been an escort in the escort business among other things since I was about 16. And now even with boyfriend, you know, I can't enjoy sex anymore. It like doesn't feel good, nothing.

1:23:40🔗 Adam We would, we would. Well, see, is he tipping good or no?

1:23:43🔗 Caller No, no. No, I've been with the same guy for, you know, about seven years.

1:23:47🔗 Adam Well, let me, let me, let's talk about the escort business for a minute. And the basic, escort is nice for prostitution?

1:23:55🔗 Caller Hey, no.

1:23:56🔗 Caller No?

1:23:57🔗 Caller Masturbation shows, come on, y'all.

1:23:59🔗 Adam Oh, I see. So it's all above the board.

1:24:02🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:24:02🔗 Adam And you never had sex with one of your clients as an escort?

1:24:06🔗 Caller Well, I don't have to answer that.

1:24:08🔗 Caller All right.

1:24:09🔗 Adam So I'm going with a big, fat yes. And how does it, like, we say you work for an escort service.

1:24:16🔗 Caller Okay.

1:24:16🔗 Adam How does that work?

1:24:18🔗 Caller Well, you call and then I'll come.

1:24:20🔗 Adam Pardon me?

1:24:21🔗 Caller You call me and then I come to your location.

1:24:23🔗 Adam I see. And who am I? Am I some businessman from out of town or a regular customer?

1:24:30🔗 Caller Regular or business travelers in hotels.

1:24:34🔗 Adam Right. And what is the normal, what's it cost me normally?

1:24:38🔗 Caller Normally between, I don't know, $200 and $400 for one hour.

1:24:42🔗 Adam And how's the tip in? Is that good?

1:24:45🔗 Caller Yeah, one's different.

1:24:48🔗 Adam Hey, Desiree?

1:24:50🔗 Caller Yes?

1:24:51🔗 Adam Are you a little crazy?

1:24:53🔗 Caller No.

1:24:54🔗 Adam No? You don't have any big problems?

1:24:56🔗 Caller No problems.

1:24:57🔗 Adam You're not a little nutty? You sound nutty.

1:25:00🔗 Caller No.

1:25:00🔗 Adam You sure? I always can tell nutty.

1:25:03🔗 Caller Just money hungry.

1:25:05🔗 Adam Money hungry?

1:25:06🔗 Caller Yeah, it's not crazy.

1:25:07🔗 Adam You sure you're not hungry for a little Prozac too?

1:25:10🔗 Caller No.

1:25:12🔗 Adam No, because you do sound crazy.

1:25:14🔗 Caller Why?

1:25:15🔗 Adam Why?

1:25:16🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:25:17🔗 Adam Basically, it's just your speech patterns, your cadence, and the way you end everything with a huh.

1:25:23🔗 Caller You're kind of like...

1:25:25🔗 Caller No, I've been known for that. I just talk that way.

1:25:28🔗 Adam Yeah. You're like the white James Brown. You're like the white female escort James Brown. Turn to trick.

1:25:35🔗 Caller Hey.

1:25:38🔗 Guest We know something like that.

1:25:39🔗 Adam So why did you get out of that business?

1:25:41🔗 Caller Well, I'm not out of the business.

1:25:42🔗 Adam Oh, you're still doing escort business.

1:25:44🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:25:45🔗 Adam And so you normally wouldn't have sex, but you'd masturbate for the guy?

1:25:49🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:25:50🔗 Caller And then with my boyfriend, I don't enjoy sex. It doesn't even mean anything.

1:25:54🔗 Drew Well, we talked about trajectories when people are sexually abused or abused in any way.

1:25:59🔗 Caller Yeah, that's never happened to me, though.

1:26:01🔗 Adam Really? But maybe you just got dropped on your head or something when you were little. Nothing happened like that? No. What about your boyfriend? He doesn't mind you being an escort?

1:26:11🔗 Caller No, not really. That's what I do.

1:26:14🔗 Guest How long has she been doing it for? How long have you been, this is Juan G. How long have you been an escort for?

1:26:18🔗 Drew Seven years.

1:26:19🔗 Guest Seven years?

1:26:20🔗 Caller About 15, 16 years.

1:26:21🔗 Guest Maybe James Brown or Pimp.

1:26:23🔗 Guest Layzie Bone would eat it.

1:26:25🔗 Drew How old were you when you first had sex?

1:26:27🔗 Caller When I first had sex, about 14.

1:26:30🔗 Adam I see. And what's your boyfriend do that he doesn't mind you being an escort for a living?

1:26:38🔗 Caller Nothing.

1:26:40🔗 Adam He doesn't have a job?

1:26:41🔗 Caller No.

1:26:42🔗 Drew Are you doing drugs or alcohol?

1:26:44🔗 Caller No. I don't drink nothing.

1:26:45🔗 Adam Really?

1:26:46🔗 Caller No.

1:26:47🔗 Caller I might have a jackery like every six months when I go out.

1:26:51🔗 Adam Yeah. Really, have you ever been on any medication or anything?

1:26:55🔗 Caller No. Never.

1:26:56🔗 Caller No medications, no drugs, nothing.

1:26:59🔗 Adam Okay. And no abuse, nothing like that?

1:27:03🔗 Caller No.

1:27:04🔗 Caller Good life. Just lived in a small town and wanted to move out and do bigger things.

1:27:08🔗 Adam Right.

1:27:09🔗 Drew Nobody ever raised a hand to you or hit you with your growing up?

1:27:14🔗 Caller Well, yeah. Boyfriends have done that before.

1:27:16🔗 Drew Yeah. But your parents never did that to you?

1:27:18🔗 Caller No. Not parents.

1:27:19🔗 Drew Really? Why were you in such a hurry to get out of your home then?

1:27:22🔗 Caller Small town.

1:27:23🔗 Caller You knew everyone by their first and last names.

1:27:25🔗 Drew Why were you in such a hurry to get out of your home?

1:27:27🔗 Caller Not in a hurry.

1:27:28🔗 Caller I just wanted to get out. There wasn't even no boys in town. I was at 14.

1:27:33🔗 Adam Yeah, baby. Oh, baby. You got blonde hair?

1:27:37🔗 Caller Yes.

1:27:38🔗 Adam Yeah. I can just see you in those big fat lips, right? You got like the overinflated lips.

1:27:43🔗 Caller My question.

1:27:44🔗 Adam Yeah. I can see her. Well, Desiree, you're really crazy, right? No. You're a little bit nutty. Well, part of being nutty is denying that you're nuts. You understand? If you admit to being nutty, you're not that nutty. You're insane.

1:27:57🔗 Caller I'm nutty, no drugs, nothing.

1:27:59🔗 Adam I know. But see, this is even a pure form of nutty because this ain't drugs nutty. This is organic nutty. This is God-given nuts.

1:28:08🔗 Guest God-given nuts. What type of music do you like?

1:28:11🔗 Adam Oh, let's find out. What do you like?

1:28:14🔗 Caller Rap, anything.

1:28:15🔗 Guest You like rap? You like Layzie Bone from Bone and Wangee? You like that type of music?

1:28:18🔗 Caller Yeah, Crazy Bone.

1:28:19🔗 Guest You like Crazy Bone? It's all a bone at the end of the day.

1:28:23🔗 Caller Oh, God.

1:28:24🔗 Caller What about my question?

1:28:26🔗 Adam You can't enjoy sex because you're having sex for a living.

1:28:29🔗 Drew You hate men for having partici-

1:28:31🔗 Caller Even when I do these things, I hate every second of it.

1:28:34🔗 Drew Yeah, but you hate- of course you hate- but there's something major missing here in your history.

1:28:38🔗 Caller I work for my boyfriend, though. I mean, we even wait for a while, and I can't wait to do it.

1:28:42🔗 Caller I go out and-

1:28:43🔗 Adam I know, but you're freaked out with guys. That's why you're doing this for a living.

1:28:47🔗 Caller Well, I'm to the point where I hate guys that-

1:28:50🔗 Adam Right.

1:28:50🔗 Drew You hate guys.

1:28:51🔗 Adam That's right. What is your boyfriend?

1:28:53🔗 Drew He's a guy.

1:28:54🔗 Adam Does he have a penis?

1:28:55🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:28:56🔗 Adam There you go. I just did the math. You hate him.

1:28:58🔗 Caller Yeah, but I don't hate him, though.

1:29:00🔗 Drew Yeah. You hate all guys.

1:29:01🔗 Adam You hate guys. That's why you're doing what you're doing.

1:29:03🔗 Drew In particular, the way they use you as a sexual object.

1:29:07🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:29:07🔗 Caller It's a sex trigger.

1:29:09🔗 Caller I go out and buy special lingerie.

1:29:11🔗 Drew Hey, listen. That's right. You've got a lot of- for some reason, you're leaving some big piece of your history out.

1:29:17🔗 Adam Let me go on a quick riff here. You can buy all the lingerie and all the perfume and all the makeup and all the peroxide and all the stiletto heels and all the teddies and all the jewelry.

1:29:28🔗 Guest Don't forget the vinegar.

1:29:29🔗 Adam And all the vinegar you want. And you can put it all over yourself and you can adorn your body with all of it but it's never going to disguise what's going on and what's emanating from the inside of you, which is you have some emotional problems. I can hear it in your voice. You hate men. You turn in tricks at 16 years old and getting out of the house at 14 because you lived in a small town as a crock of crap. I don't believe it for a second. You got serious issues with men. You hate them by your own admittance. Your boyfriend is a man and all the lingerie and perfume in the world is not going to make up for that. You got some emotional work to do.

1:30:04🔗 Drew This is serious stuff.

1:30:05🔗 Adam That's right.

1:30:06🔗 Guest That's deep.

1:30:06🔗 Adam Thank you. I get deep every once in a while, right Drew?

1:30:09🔗 Guest That's deep.

1:30:09🔗 Drew Yeah, last time it was about Jim Sox and Poopoo.

1:30:13🔗 Adam Yes, I have a broad range. I can delve into the psyche of a 23 year old escort or I can talk about wiping my ass with a tube sock for a half hour.

1:30:23🔗 Guest Or seeing an 80 year old vagina.

1:30:24🔗 Adam Or seeing an 80 year old vagina. That just left two of you. We're on a 12 year old, everybody. We'll take ourselves a break, we'll be back.

1:31:05🔗 Caller Yes, it is Loveline.

1:31:07🔗 Adam I'm Adam Corolla, it's Dr. Drew over there. What's up? Juan G, Felecia, Lazy Bone are all here tonight.

1:31:13🔗 Guest Chilling, man.

1:31:14🔗 Adam The Royal Impression is the name of the CD. Juan wanted to talk about something before we took our next call. What was that?

1:31:21🔗 Guest Yeah, well, first of all, we want to talk about the new movie that we're working on myself and Lazy Bone. It's called The Felons.

1:31:25🔗 Guest It's called The Felons. It's an animated movie, you know what I mean? It's like a movie, sort of like Toy Story, Bugs Life or something like that, but it's the first hip hop done animation movie about, you know, like chronological orders or crime.

1:31:40🔗 Guest Looking for the Chronic. Looking for the Chronic and it's directed by a good friend of mine named Ralph. And The Felons is something that we're going to be doing. We got like all kinds of artists that's going to be in this movie and it's going to be a great thing. And we're just putting it together.

1:31:53🔗 Guest Directed by Hype Williams, right?

1:31:54🔗 Guest Directed by Hype Williams. And it's called The Felons. And also, I like to say...

1:31:58🔗 Adam Any white voices?

1:31:59🔗 Guest Yeah.

1:32:00🔗 Adam What about this voice?

1:32:01🔗 Guest Oh man, that would be beautiful.

1:32:03🔗 Guest We need to get you animated. Both of you guys animated would look really hot too. You know what I'm saying? Your character. Because you guys are worse than Siskel and Evert. You guys...

1:32:10🔗 Adam Well, one of us is dead, that means, right?

1:32:12🔗 Guest No, not yet.

1:32:13🔗 Adam All right, well put me in... Yes, yes. I'd like to do a voiceover in this movie.

1:32:17🔗 Guest And another thing we just like to say what's up to our new management team, Mr. John Sally of the Lakers. What's up, John Sally?

1:32:23🔗 Guest Much love, much love.

1:32:24🔗 Guest Anybody, if you know John Sally personally, let them know that Wanji said what's up with Layzie Bone because he's had a lot of stuff for us. Mr. John Sally just came.

1:32:32🔗 Adam Is he doing management now?

1:32:33🔗 Guest Man, John Sally is involved in everything.

1:32:35🔗 Guest He's doing a little bit of everything.

1:32:36🔗 Adam I know he's involved with everything.

1:32:37🔗 Guest He's got his own show on BT. He's got his ring from last year. He's assistant coach. He's doing everything. Mr. John Sally, you know Wanji, Haiti Boy loves you.

1:32:45🔗 Adam And John Sally is a really nice guy, too.

1:32:48🔗 Guest And a real tall guy.

1:32:50🔗 Adam Yeah, he's a really tall guy. Is he seven foot, six and eleven?

1:32:54🔗 Guest Man, after you cross six and eight, it all looks the same to me.

1:32:57🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:32:58🔗 Guest It all looks the same.

1:32:59🔗 Adam I'd go with seven. But you know the weird thing about John Sally is he's almost seven feet. But I never thought of him as a seven foot guy. I thought of him as a basketball player and as a tall guy. But not a seven, not that tall for some reason.

1:33:13🔗 Guest I actually first met John Sally. I met him about a year ago when I actually met him in person. Man, I couldn't believe how tall he is. The guy's leg, his knee is up to here practically. The brother is tall but he's a good brother. And he's making that transition to music and he's helping me and Layzie Bone out. We love you John Sally.

1:33:30🔗 Adam He is tall.

1:33:30🔗 Drew Remember?

1:33:31🔗 Guest He has swift 6'11.

1:33:33🔗 Adam Right, he moves. When we met him he rested his balls on top of your head while we were standing there. Remember that?

1:33:38🔗 Drew That was your shoulders.

1:33:39🔗 Adam Oh, that was my shoulder. That's right.

1:33:41🔗 Guest Also to Deleah. Also to Mr. Deleah and the Wired TV crew. We love you man and everybody out there. Code 415, our little homies out there in Sandy Miss. We love everybody. How tall are you Adam?

1:33:53🔗 Adam I'm 6'2.

1:33:54🔗 Guest 6'2. How about you Mr. Doctor?

1:33:56🔗 Drew Little under 6'1.

1:33:57🔗 Guest Man, these guys are cool man. This is an opportunity to be sitting up in here with these cats because seeing these guys on MTV and in person is like, man, Beavis and Butt-Head ain't got nothing on them.

1:34:07🔗 Adam Thank you.

1:34:07🔗 Guest Sisterly burden on them. I love you all man. Juan she represent with Layzie Bone, Bone Thugs. What's up y'all?

1:34:13🔗 Adam Adrienne.

1:34:14🔗 Caller Hello.

1:34:14🔗 Adam What is up?

1:34:16🔗 Caller Okay. A few years ago, I had a knot in my lower abdomen by my pelvic bone.

1:34:20🔗 Drew What do you mean a knot?

1:34:22🔗 Caller It was like this hard ball and like a year and a half ago, I was engaged and we thought that maybe I was pregnant and you could feel it because I heard rumors that it feels like an orange or whatever. So I took two home pregnancy tests and they both came up negative. And then we went to his family doctor and they took a urine sample and it came up positive. And the doctor told me that it was probably an ectopic pregnancy and that I would have to terminate it because there's no chance of survival.

1:34:50🔗 Adam Right. So it was in the tube?

1:34:52🔗 Caller Yeah. And he said that if I didn't have it terminated, it would blow up my tube.

1:34:56🔗 Drew That's typically what happens.

1:34:58🔗 Caller So he told me to go to the emergency room and have a blood test done.

1:35:02🔗 Adam So meaning the egg lodges in the fallopian tube and the baby starts developing. And eventually like a 14-year-old comes blasting out of your abdomen.

1:35:11🔗 Drew Exactly.

1:35:11🔗 Adam It's not in your stomach.

1:35:12🔗 Drew It's not in the uterus.

1:35:13🔗 Adam I mean your uterus. I always think of babies in the stomach.

1:35:16🔗 Drew And it rips open the tube and they bleed and bleed to death.

1:35:18🔗 Adam Alright. So you have to have an abortion, right?

1:35:20🔗 Caller No.

1:35:21🔗 Drew The thing's already dead.

1:35:22🔗 Caller This is the weird part. They told me to go to the emergency room to get a blood test done. So I went and they did the blood test. It came up negative and they were like, well, we don't know what's wrong with you. There's nothing we can do to help you. And I'm like, well, you know, if there is an ectopic pregnancy, I want to have it terminated because I don't want parts of me blowing up randomly. So they said that it wasn't that and it could be some kind of irritable bowel syndrome. And they started asking me all kinds of questions and everything came up normal.

1:35:49🔗 Adam I had a blood test done.

1:35:50🔗 Drew What's your question?

1:35:51🔗 Adam Yeah, please.

1:35:52🔗 Drew What's the question?

1:35:52🔗 Adam I'm getting irritable bowel listening to this. What is your question?

1:35:56🔗 Caller The question is, nothing happened from then. And then all of a sudden it's back again. This is the third time that I've had it.

1:36:02🔗 Drew Well, that's sort of typical of irritable bowel.

1:36:03🔗 Adam So you think it may be that. All right. So what should you do?

1:36:06🔗 Drew See an internist.

1:36:07🔗 Adam All right. Real fast. Dan?

1:36:09🔗 Yes.

1:36:10🔗 Adam You're 25. You're in S&M?

1:36:12🔗 Caller Yes. That's right.

1:36:12🔗 Adam All right. Get out of it. We're out of time. But that's enough of that nonsense. You're beating on everyone. Everyone beating on you. No, no.

1:36:18🔗 Caller Seriously. I just love, I love dominant women. And I, you know, I've always dated them.

1:36:23🔗 Adam Great. That means you have low self-esteem if you want a woman beating on you in the sack. You understand me?

1:36:29🔗 Caller Really?

1:36:30🔗 Adam Yes. You're the man. You're in charge.

1:36:31🔗 Caller Well, I usually am. Like in the relationship.

1:36:33🔗 Adam Oh, listen to that voice. Listen, you, Chihuahua would kick your ass.

1:36:37🔗 Caller Kick my ass.

1:36:38🔗 Adam Please, please. I got a Persian cannon whip your ass.

1:36:44🔗 Caller What about like, what about like if you get into a good relationship with somebody actually cares?

1:36:48🔗 Adam Here's what you do when you find someone who's nuts, don't let them, who's not insane, don't let them find out you're nuts. That's what you should do. Don't bring up the whole whips and chains thing.

1:36:58🔗 Drew The fetish tends to diminish the intimacy. It's not as though it's an exploration of some higher level of intimacy. It's in fact the distancing in your relationship.

1:37:05🔗 Right.

1:37:05🔗 Adam All right. We'll take a break.

1:37:09🔗 Loveline, with Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew.

1:37:11🔗 Caller 1-800-12-1-9-1. Can he live?

1:37:41🔗 Adam No, he died. Hey, I know Anderson, you hate that. That's bad TV. Bad radio.

1:37:46🔗 Drew Good TV, bad radio.

1:37:47🔗 Adam Thank you very much.

1:37:48🔗 Guest Who's that guy?

1:37:49🔗 Adam All right, it's the, don't worry about him, it's just the engineer. All right, I want to thank Wanjee, Felecia, and Layzie Bone for coming in here tonight. Doing a great job. The Royal Impression is what you should look for. Yeah, it's in the stores. And everything else. Just look for everything.

1:38:03🔗 Guest Yeah, that's right.

1:38:04🔗 Adam Everything, because everyone, it's all cross-pollinated. They're involved. They're getting money off everything, so just look for everything.

1:38:10🔗 Guest One G. The Royal Impression. Pick it up. It's in the stores right now. The Mo Thugs mothership album with Felecia Bone. It's in the stores now. Go pick it up. And I just would like to say what's up to everybody. I love you all out there. My family, Lexus Vogel, Tommy Vogel, Trillane, Warren, Pops, everybody that's listening, 415, everybody. And just keep supporting us because this hip-hop thing is really positive. And we're trying to keep it going and trying to get it to go to new places. So support that hip-hop and do that.

1:38:37🔗 Adam I'd like to tell my family to kiss my ass. No, you can't. Yet again. Alright, I want to thank Lauren for doing a great job on the phones and Anderson for doing a great job, engineering. Thanks a lot, guys. That's it.

1:38:49🔗 Guest That's it. We out.

1:38:50🔗 Adam Much love. So until next time, Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew San Mahalo. At least I'm not crapping into a bag.

1:38:58🔗 This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Dan Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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