2:19🔗AdamYes, it is Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, he is Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-4-4-5-5, Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist, and tonight we're coming to you from the Radio and Television Museum or TV and Radio Museum. In beautiful Beverly Hills, California, we've been asked to I don't know, what have we been asked to do?
2:46🔗AdamYes, the first time we've ever been asked to do anything. People have shown up, that's very nice of them, they'll all be gone in the next fifteen minutes I'm sure.
2:59🔗AdamWell, we're sitting in this booth, and it's got glass walls all the way around it, and then there's a little bit of seating, and there's a sort of disappointed crowd.
3:10🔗DrewBored and disappointed. Tired, tired, bored, disappointed.
3:13🔗AdamTo be fair to us, we are a full two and a half minutes into the show. True. So the bloom is off the rose, as they say. But people are sitting around drinking a complimentary diet soda. I've never been more shocked.
3:26🔗DrewI've never been more shocked to see you go out, sit down with a group of people and begin conversing.
4:40🔗DrewThis audience is bothering me. They're egging you on. This is very disturbing. If you get a little chock out of the audience, I can feel you gearing up for the next move.
4:48🔗AdamWell, it's great because normally we have...
4:52🔗AdamWell, what we have is Drew, who's Drew. He's a cigar store Indian. It's like a, really, it's like doing comedy in front of a cardboard refrigerator box.
5:03🔗AdamSeven million shows, I could care less. She's still waiting for the poor man to come back. And then we have Anderson, who's knee deep in some sort of Dungeons and Dragons thing on the computer with his back turned to us. So I normally do not have the luxury of playing to a partisan crowd. So what were you talking about, Mary?
6:10🔗DrewAre you wearing, using condoms, safe sex, contraception?
6:14🔗AdamAll right, Drew, what would cause this bleeding?
6:15🔗DrewWell, sometimes just the act of sex deem it some women to bleed. And some women, every single time they have sex, they will bleed a little bit.
6:35🔗DrewMary, and because you're young and active sexually, it really is important, and because you're having some symptoms that just should be evaluated just for the sake of completeness, you ought to see your doctor. Again, young women get cervical cancer, and it's important that the early age of onset of sexual activity tends to increase the risk of that. So it's something to take care of, okay?
6:52🔗AdamWomen, women bleed often and for no reason, right?
6:56🔗DrewThat's what I'm saying. That's a paraphrase of what I said.
6:58🔗AdamNo, but what I mean is, is they don't need, they don't need a good excuse to bleed.
7:04🔗DrewWhat would a good excuse be? Just, just for the sake of argument.
7:06🔗AdamPeriod, knife wound, something like that. Do you know what I'm saying?
7:11🔗AdamIt doesn't bleed and it doesn't mean anything. As a guy, blood was coming out of your chin to tell you, you'd be airlifted to the nearest hospital.
7:20🔗DrewExcept our collars. Right. They'd sit around and think about it for three months.
7:26🔗GuestHi. I'm Colleen. I have a question. I just recently got involved with a man who I believe may be a sex addict. I'm not sure. I'm just divorced a year and I just got involved with him about two months ago.
7:45🔗DrewAnd what makes you believe he's a sex addict?
7:48🔗GuestWell, he kind of openly admitted it to me. He said, you know, I hadn't heard him all day and I called him late. And I said, you know, what's going on? You know, I didn't hear from you. I emailed him a few times and he didn't write back or call me.
8:38🔗GuestWhat do you mean, what was he doing? No, he was on the internet. He's a traitor.
8:41🔗AdamIf there was a chair, I could get in there with him.
8:43🔗DrewShe's getting there. He's addicted to this.
8:45🔗GuestHe's a traitor. He also designs websites and he was hinging around to me the night that all this computer stuff in his house is for sexual internet online. And I'm really, I'm kind of freaked out about it, but I really like it.
9:01🔗DrewIs he an addict with it? He has consequences from the behaviors. He's losing money. He's losing relationships.
9:07🔗GuestI think his whole motive is the sexual end of it and the financial end of it because he's looking to open a website to go forward with the sexual addiction. He's trying to find his release online, I think. Do you understand me?
9:24🔗AdamOkay, how is this manifesting itself exactly?
9:29🔗DrewAll we hear is that he's into online sex. That's all we're getting.
9:32🔗GuestI don't think he's into online sex. I think that he's trying to satisfy his sexual addiction through online. Now he's going to start his own... Because he can... He can create...
10:09🔗AdamThat's true. Drew just got up from under the desk. That's how much I enjoy the blowjobs.
10:14🔗GuestHe's totally addicted to oral sex, both giving and receiving.
10:19🔗AdamOh, boy. Next thing you know, you're going to get hooked up with a cuddler.
10:23🔗DrewYeah. Let's define what addiction means, right? Progressive behaviors in the face of consequences. What are the consequences of his behaviors?
10:31🔗GuestUh, his consequences that could... This could lead to somewhere that I'm not comfortable with going. I mean, the oral sex is no problem, but I'm trying to find out what is... If he's... If he's open enough with me right now within two months to say, I am a sexual addict, I have a problem, what am I facing?
10:50🔗DrewWell, if indeed is a sexual addict, you're probably facing a pretty painful relationship. Have you been involved with other addicts?
10:56🔗GuestNot at all. I was married for four years, just divorced a year.
11:00🔗DrewHe wasn't an alcoholic or anything, no alcohols in your family anywhere.
11:18🔗AdamWith a mute. Okay. Listen, we don't exactly know what the problem is. We're not that interested because you're having trouble explaining it. He doesn't sound like all that bad a guy.
11:29🔗DrewHe doesn't sound like a sex addict. He sounds like kind of a weird guy into weird stuff that she may not be into. And he's sort of, you know, often tangents and sort of sexual proclivities are sort of strangely expressed.
11:41🔗AdamAnd listen, keep in mind, ladies, when you're dating a new guy and he starts talking about being a sexual addict, he's not trying to impress you. You know what I'm saying?
11:52🔗DrewHe also probably doesn't mean he's a sexual addict, right?
11:54🔗AdamThis is the opposite of I drive a Porsche.
11:57🔗DrewHow many sex addicts announce that in the opening weeks of a relationship? Unless they intend to chase the person away or include them in some weird behaviors. Right.
12:05🔗AdamThey want to make a film or they want to out.
12:08🔗CallerOh, hey. Actually, I got to be honest. I made up my question. But I just wanted to call to say I think you guys are really awesome. Thanks. Drew, you deserve a Nobel Prize.
12:24🔗CallerBut actually, the only real thing I want to know is me and some friends of mine are going down to LA in a week. And we were wondering if we could go by the studio and just say how you guys are doing. Are you hot? No, my friends are.
12:43🔗AdamAll of you within the sound of my voice can come over on that same night. Yeah, I don't know. Ann, you want to? Ann doesn't. And we'll put them on hold?
14:37🔗DrewBecause when they're eight, that's a big deal.
14:39🔗AdamThat's a great graduate to that. Oh, because a dad would pitch otherwise?
14:42🔗DrewIt goes eyeball, T-ball, coach pitch, then kid pitch.
14:45🔗AdamWait, there is an eyeball? Oh, you made that up. All right, I'm such an idiot. I thought it stumbled on to something. I never played any T-ball for the record. I went straight to triple A. I was playing with the Mud Hens in Albuquerque when I was eight. So, all right, so you saw Drew over there was doing a good job, probably on the cell phone the whole time the kids were batting, right?
15:07🔗GuestNo, no, he wasn't. He was watching, but I like saw him, and I didn't want to go up to him and bother him because I thought that was kind of rude. But yeah, I just wanted to say that I saw you and your wife and your kids. And anyway, OK, my question. Well, like, whenever I see guys, I get kind of nervous. So I don't know, I kind of throw myself at them. And so I don't know how I could stop that because I don't like want to do it.
15:34🔗DrewSo it's a way of sort of taking control of a situation where that's what you want to do. But you'd rather that you receive some sort of reciprocation or that they initiate it. But you don't wait for all that. You just go right ahead. Yeah. And guys, of course, obliged, right?
15:56🔗AdamWell, what do you mean throw yourself at them? Sexually? Do you throw parts at them?
16:03🔗GuestI like to dodge a boob once in a while.
16:06🔗GuestNo, like, for example, I went to a dance the other day and I made out with this guy that I didn't even know. I knew him for like five minutes and we were making out like five minutes later. It was weird. But like that, I want love, I guess. So I kind of find it in odd ways.
16:23🔗DrewRight, which is most women that are behaving compulsively sexually or really sex and love addicted more than sex addicted.
16:31🔗AdamYeah. Well, I mean, it's sort of attention is attention.
16:34🔗DrewWell, it's connection is, yeah. Did you, did you?
16:41🔗DrewDo you have a problem with your relationship with him in some way?
16:43🔗GuestYeah. He like, I don't know, he kind of like, I don't know if he's, like, counter-abuse, but yeah, he kind of like abused me when I was younger.
16:51🔗GuestHe just like, hit me sometimes. Or like, I don't know, he likes to like, threaten to do stuff like, he's like, oh, I'm gonna like, bash your head or something. I don't know, like.
17:00🔗DrewThat's a little something. So you could see why you feel sort of...
17:03🔗AdamHey, put it in context. You know, bash head, you know, if it's said in a nice way.
17:09🔗GuestNot really, but like, I don't know, I get like, really sensitive and I like...
17:12🔗DrewYeah, of course, Jessica. So, of course, you've been abused, you've been violated in some way, boundaries have been, have been pressed aside.
17:18🔗AdamI want to go off on a jag here. So I'll just put...
17:21🔗DrewSo the point is, it's understandable you'd behave these way. In fact, that it's only this way is sort of almost rates in the charming scale, that this is all she's doing. You know what I'm saying?
17:34🔗DrewJust be careful, Jessica. Just realize that you're worth a lot more. Be careful choices with whom you choose to be close with and realize that a guy that really is worth being with you and wants to be with you will initiate and will let you know that things are OK and safe and you can get close to them without having to throw yourself in the situation, OK?
17:50🔗GuestBut like, how would I know, like, if they're like that?
17:53🔗DrewYou're going to have to trust that it's OK to sit back and wait and see. You're going to have to contain yourself. Count to 11. It's a little trick I learned today. Count to 11, all right? Slowly. I'm glad you're having a review today. And I was advising my staff not to blurt stuff out, not to give too much information, because you tend to expose yourself to stuff. We all tried to count to 11 and it worked very well.
18:40🔗DrewYou know, when somebody is testing you and you start talking about the wonderful things you're doing and end up exposing things that you shouldn't have been doing or have not been doing so well. Just let the person ask you the question.
18:56🔗DrewOr your proclivity for young women. What's the jag you wanted to go on?
18:59🔗AdamI just wanted to say that, and we've talked about it before, that husbands or fathers can really screw up their daughters. They don't screw up their sons that badly, but they can really F up their daughters. And I don't even know if they know they're doing it, but it, I mean, guys, if you can hear me, and you've got a young daughter, and you're slapping her around, or you're not paying attention to her, or you're coming at her in a sexual way, she will be a porn star. She will be a stripper. She will sleep with every guy. Everyone will become daddy. She will be, there will be this void that will never be filled, and you will ruin her life. Whereas guys just excel at football. You know what I mean?
20:18🔗GuestExactly. So I've sort of given up the search on finding them. But looking at being a single parent, and I was wondering, Dr. Drew, if you had any research information and the ambulance is going to go by here, sorry, if you had any information on how kids are turning out, coming out of single parent families.
20:37🔗DrewWell, there's lots of data out there and not all of it's real clear.
20:41🔗GuestWhere it's not a divorce, where you don't have the abandonment issue.
21:30🔗AdamI'd go China. What would you go, Drew? I'd go Chinese kid. Cells and math. He's gonna do good. He's gonna play the violin. Make you proud one day. You get that Russian kid. He's getting into the booze.
21:43🔗AdamHe's joined some sort of, you know, he's running with the wrong crowd. The Russian kid, no. You go Chinese.
21:49🔗DrewVery complex issues, Joanne. You're bringing three major issues into the mixer that I can see. One is issues of attachment in early childhood are profoundly impactful on brain development and future emotional development. You don't know what level of intimacy and attachment and sort of nurturing this child to have that you're going to pick up in another continent.
22:14🔗AdamDon't finish. Listen, what is the kid's alternative?
22:17🔗DrewI understand. Number two, the issue of how single parenting can be very successful. What are the risks? They usually tend to distill down to what I would sort of put under the umbrella of issues of handling aggression, particularly for the males, that aggression management, impulse control, all that seems to be affected by not having a male father around. But that doesn't mean you can't bring a male figure into his life. They would serve that function adequately if you pay attention.
22:44🔗DrewNo. But that's the third issue is because you had an a-hole dad, your radar is bent, you become attracted to a-hole guys, so you're going to drop the whole process, not look inside and try to figure out how you could heal from that abusive childhood and maybe attract and be attracted to more appropriate kinds of partners. You're going to abandon the whole process of intimacy and now make that whole empty problem a child's problem. The child's going to fix this. And that is the worst way to bring a child into the world.
23:13🔗AdamYeah, who wants to, you're raising a kid and you're coming from the from the starting point of I'm too screwed up for a relationship, so I'm going to raise a kid.
23:35🔗AdamIt's got to be joking there. Get out of here.
23:45🔗CallerLoveline tonight is being brought to you by the Cobalt Lounge and Car Toys.
24:05🔗AdamIt is Loveline and Adam Carolla. He is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. We're at the Television and Radio Museum in beautiful Beverly Hills doing a little broadcast tonight, a little on-site broadcast. Drew's computer just took a dump.
24:23🔗AdamSo the show is going to go from bad to worse, everyone.
24:25🔗DrewAnd let's see, the museum's address is 465 North Beverly. We were asked to promote this thing, right? In Beverly Hills Corner Bowl, Santa Monica, and Beverly. Parking is free. Admission to the broadcast is free. The Festival Hotline is 310-786-1015.
24:40🔗AdamYes, we're going to have some real talent in here later in the week. So we do not have a phone screen now.
25:08🔗GuestOkay. Here's what's up. Basically, in a nutshell, I'm afraid to receive oral sex. I have no sex drive and when I do have sex, I very, very rarely enjoy it. And I'm trying to figure out if the being afraid of receiving oral sex would be a factor of having been abused sexually. I'm really not sure.
25:32🔗DrewLet's think about it for a second. Use your imagination. Doesn't it make sense that unpleasant sexual symptoms now might have something to do with what happened to your kid?
25:41🔗GuestYes, but I'm just saying, would that be a sign of sexual abuse? I mean, I agree I need therapy, but I'm just saying...
26:16🔗AdamI'll tell you, our callers go from dumb to retard in just a heartbeat. You don't know you've been sexually abused? This is just purely a hypothetical question.
27:07🔗AdamGod bless you. I have to clone her, Drew. We have to get some cells, we have to get some cell samples. Make her in the lab. Yeah. And what's your husband think about that?
27:18🔗GuestWell, he obviously doesn't like it too much.
27:22🔗AdamHe says he doesn't like it, but he's feeling like he dodged a bullet there. Drew, you'd be all right with that with your wife, right? She's going to kick your ass when you get home.
27:59🔗AdamI used to have a fear of flying and then we got hooked up the bunch of people that sent us around the country every other week so they could make 15 percent of it. Right.
28:07🔗DrewThat's right. Then we lost our fear of flying.
28:08🔗AdamNow, all of a sudden, all I do on planes is complain.
28:17🔗AdamIs sitting next to me and me complaining and tell you to stop doing those goddamn Scantron tests and start listening to me. I got problems with the building inspector and my garbage man. And I demand to be hurt. Right.
28:42🔗AdamNo. I mean, maybe we're slitting our own throats here by just saying, you know, not everything needs therapy. Not everything needs a book. Just if there's something that you're not into and there's no concrete reason that you're not into it. Just do it. Relax. You get used to it. It's fine.
29:20🔗DrewThat's different. I would say, hold still.
29:22🔗AdamYou know what I do when I get the oral sex? I focus on one spot.
29:27🔗DrewThe ceiling? One little grains of the cottage cheese in your ceiling?
29:30🔗AdamThat's right. You know what I do when I get oral sex? Actually, I focus my eyeballs on one part of... It's inside my skull, actually, because my eyes will always roll back. But one part of my frontal lobe, I will actually stare at from underneath.
30:52🔗AdamNo, here's how it happens. It's usually after sleeping, but sometimes it's from a nap. And sometimes it's just the right combination, emotionally and physically. Maybe you had yourself like some funky herbal tea or something, and you ate a jar of peanut butter or something. It could be a physical, chemical thing. But I woke up from a nap two days ago, and I had an erection that actually bent up and came all the way around and made a loop. It was so hard. It made a full eye hook. I mean, I woke up, I took like a 45-minute nap. I don't know, God knows what I was dreaming about, but it was like, oh my God, this thing is, it's got a life of its own. It frightened me. And I thought, this is the kind of boner that I've rarely had in front of a woman. This is a great, great boner, and it'll be gone in a few moments. It'll never come back like some of the greatest farting I've ever done. Gone, gone, into thin air, never to be appreciated. Huh?
31:55🔗CallerI'm not gonna say that. That's the problem.
33:23🔗AdamYou know what? It's like when you get really stoned and you think about breathing, you start to hyperventilate and choke. You know, hey, you guys ever get really stoned? I'm talking to the audience. You're really stoned and you're eating, right? Like I always do. I get stoned. I'll eat all the time.
33:39🔗AdamAnd I'll start eating. I'll start eating. Now I'll be just having a great time. I'll be eating and then halfway in it, I'll be chomping down. I'll go, I wonder where my tongue is right now. I mean, I know it's in my mouth, but how's it working? I mean, is it going in and out to get in between my teeth? I know it's pushing food around and stuff. And then I will bite my tongue within 15 seconds of wondering where my tongue is because I was stoned and I was thinking about it. And this is what this guy is doing with his penis. You don't need to, you shouldn't be thinking too much about it. When you're having sex, he starts thinking about it. He has difficulty. What does he need to do? He's 21, it's been a promise whole life, I think he needs to go somewhere.
34:15🔗DrewI, for some reason, can't seem to get information on Matt. It's all very, remember that we talked about last night that...
34:19🔗AdamGuys who have no personality, just a rap?
34:22🔗DrewThe rap thing, yeah, lots of rap. And so I didn't get much information. Medicine is the number one thing, other biological causes are very important, anxiety is a very important cause, all things for him to think about.
34:31🔗AdamDon't you think he should just go to a clinic or go to a specialist?
34:34🔗DrewGo to a doctor and yeah, certainly, they're not special, let's just start with the general doctor. Sure, Penny.
34:38🔗AdamWell, why talk to someone else when they're doing it?
34:39🔗Drew30, you're a dick. Excuse me, Penny, not you, I dare you.
34:59🔗CallerAnd I break it, well, you have to take two, so 2,000 milligrams of antibiotics for seven days, a day, 2,000 a day for seven days to get rid of some infection in my cuticle that rocks my fingernail. And then my question was, if I'm allergic to latex, am I going to be allergic to latex condoms? Because I had-
35:15🔗DrewWhat does, what does fingernail infection have to do with allergy?
35:21🔗CallerI was, I don't know, I was told I was allergic to latex.
35:26🔗DrewWell, allergy to latex is allergy to latex. All latex, all contact. So yes, you would expect that if that's in fact the case. And it's a pretty common allergy. So-
36:17🔗CallerAnyway, my question was, okay, after my last pregnancy out of tubulation and my cycles cut down to like four days a week and that was it. And I was normally seven days a week. Well, now this past year I've lost 180 pounds. Okay. Went from a size 26 to size 14. And now my cycle's back to seven days a week.
36:36🔗DrewBy seven days a week, you mean seven days a month?
36:39🔗CallerI'm sorry. Seven. You know what I mean. 21 days, 28 days, I have a cycle for seven days.
37:35🔗DrewWait, wait. Say that again. You let that one go right past us.
37:38🔗AdamYou got sexy and impregnated you while you were asleep?
37:41🔗CallerI'm pretty sure because I don't remember having sex and I don't remember it because up until my eighth, I didn't even see the doctor until I was eight months pregnant because I never felt her move and up until like the month before I had it and then she started being more active.
37:53🔗DrewDid you have a, did you have any sort of dissociative disorder? I mean, did you, were you abused some as a kid and kind of?
38:37🔗DrewThat is true that you should not be able to get pregnant and your irregularity or your your change in your menstrual cycling should have nothing to do with fertility. Okay.
38:46🔗AdamAll right, baby. You keep going. Hey, listen, listen. Let me tell you something. You're looking good now, right? Right. Right. Oh, Drew, put her on hold. Let me tell you something. All you gals who've lost 185 pounds or more. I know it's a milestone. I know you feel good about it. I know you've never felt better about yourself and that's great.
39:07🔗AdamBut don't tell the dude, the new dude you're dating that you lost basically a junior college outside linebacker. You know what I'm saying? Because it'll freak his ass out. You're feeling good and you think you'll score points with this. And if you are a man, you might score some points with a woman, but men's minds don't work that way. You could see a woman who looked beautiful. 125 pounds of 5'8, and fit as a fiddle. If she told you she lost 200 pounds...
39:39🔗AdamLet's go through the manhood. Because you're at dinner, and basically when she's saying I've lost 200 pounds, it's like her saying, I was in a horrible fire. Do you understand? Like you're picturing, like what's going to happen when that blouse comes off? What am I going to be looking at? And it freaks them out.
39:57🔗DrewLet's say she wears a bathing suit and things look okay, but it's still be freaked out?
40:02🔗AdamBecause I'm scared when I have sex with a woman who used to be fat that she's pushing her fat up my penis and that my ass is going to get big.
40:43🔗AdamIt is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. He is Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. We're at the Television and Radio Museum in Beverly Hills. I've never been here before.
40:53🔗DrewIt's a great place, isn't it? Beautiful.
40:57🔗DrewYou've been to one in New York a bunch of times.
40:59🔗AdamThat's because Kevin and Bean were broadcasting for like a whole week when I used to get to go over there and have a good time before a ball and chain. It's Loveline. But it is beautiful. And you know, I walk around. It's like a it's like a hospital, like a sanitarium in here. Sort of like everything's white and there's marble. There's no molding or casing anywhere. Lots of glass. And then and then wonder where the money come from for this thing. Where did it come from? Who's paying for this?
42:43🔗AdamMine smells like fresh cut pine, so you got trouble. People ask me to whack off in their car to freshen it up. We'll have people go like, hey, I spilled my bong in the apartment. Could you come in here and jack off on the carpet? Folks are coming in. Folks are coming in from out of town.
43:01🔗AdamAll right. Well, yeah, it was it all smells bad. It seems it always smells like bleach. Isn't it true?
43:09🔗DrewAnd bleach is not the word that jumps into my head, leaps into my mind. But, John, it doesn't sound like anything you should be worried about.
43:15🔗GuestOK, well, I think it might have something to do with.
45:16🔗AdamNo kidding. I'm getting depressed too. Hey, all you can do is work on your own life, make your life better. That's the only way to get over a bad relationship. You just got to work on your own ass. That's it. Therapy, go on long walks, listen to classical music, do a lot of push ups. Pretend like you're in prison and you're training for a fight. You know what I mean, Drew? A lot of chin ups on like the towel bar and stuff like that in the bathroom.
45:41🔗DrewAnd what you're saying in that self care is important.
45:43🔗AdamWould you hang up on him, please, before we talk more about clay? This kid knew about clay though, I'll tell you that. I forgot I knew so much about clay. Drew, you know what an extruder is? No. Extruder, this is how the posers make a coil pot. Instead of rolling their own coil, they stuff the clay into the extruder and then pull the handle down. It's like a big orange juice maker. And the extruded coil comes out. But that ain't old school, brother. You don't bring that extruder around here. Right?
46:21🔗CallerI actually got two questions. One, my friends smoke quite a bit of weed and I hang around with them, party with them, stuff like that. Now, I don't smoke. Question I have for you is, will the second hand smoke from that? Will that stain your system as long as actually smoking it directly?
46:36🔗DrewNo, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Well, if you were like in a tiny enclosed space where the smoke was the predominant makeup of the air you were breathing, yeah, it would be the same as smoking it from a cigarette, but that essentially doesn't happen.
46:53🔗DrewIf you locked yourself in a car and lit a bonfire, yes, you would get a lot of smoke that way, but just in a passive situation in a room, no. Every addict I know wants to blame their positive urine on that fact and I've yet to have one and substantiate it.
47:06🔗CallerThe reason I have just got a job in drug testing.
47:10🔗AdamShouldn't it be negative urine? Shouldn't we start calling the drug soaked urine negative urine and start calling the clean urine positive urine to give it sort of a happier spin? Yeah, you know, why should we be punished for not doing drugs by having negative urine? You know what I'm saying?
47:27🔗AdamAll right, we'll be back after this. It is Loveline, a very special edition of Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew. We're coming to you tonight from the Television and Radio Museum in beautiful Beverly Hills. Drew, you doing good?
48:04🔗DrewYeah, I feel pretty good. How about you?
49:38🔗GuestWhat happened yesterday was me and my girlfriend weren't having sex. Right. And her dad came in, like he caught us and he like started kicking my ass, like nasty, you know. And I was wondering, like if I could report on him, I'm like, if I won't get in trouble because I have to, because his daughter also.
49:54🔗AdamDid he kick your ass? And was, were you actually having sex with her when he walked in?
49:59🔗GuestHe was hitting me in the head and like he just, I felt like something pounded me in the back of the head. And like before I know it, he was kicking my ass.
50:20🔗GuestNo, he walked in. And we didn't hear it because like the room is like real close to the door, you know, and like we heard and I was trying to get up. And before I knew it, he started like pounding on me. Right.
50:33🔗GuestI, you know, there's there's something great about like I try to get my clothes, you know, but at least hold on to that.
50:38🔗AdamYou know, only a few of us have suffered the humiliation of taking a beating with an erection. Naked, naked, naked with an erection, like scrambling with an erection and being beaten.
50:52🔗AdamTalk about it. Your brain doesn't even know how to begin to process that because your brain is still getting oral sex for a full ten minutes after it's stopped.
51:59🔗AdamAt 15, they all beat the crap out of each other. That's how they get in the gang. You guys know that, right? That's a rite of passage. Do not question the culture, Drew. The point is, is what guy, what guy from LA, what Mexican guy from LA is going to go report the dad for giving him a mild whooping after he's getting a BJ from her daughter? All right. You know what I'm saying?
52:23🔗DrewFair enough. It's late at night. Carrie, 24.
52:28🔗CallerI don't know if you already know what my question was, but I just have a quick one. It's, my husband takes a lot of amphetamines. He works out a lot. And I don't know, he's on a lot. He takes a lot of pills and a lot of liquid things. And I don't know if that has an effect on his sex drive or it has anything to do with him.
52:44🔗DrewCarrie, do you understand how dangerous that is and how profoundly addicted he is?
52:48🔗CallerYou know, and I tell him all the time to just lay off of them, but he...
52:52🔗DrewCarrie, wait, he is an addict. He's doing GHB and amphetamine?
54:05🔗AdamYeah. You know what I can't stand? You ever see those workout couples? Yeah. They're both working out. They both look like they just got back from the tan salon. And they're both, they have to like paste it on smile. They look like, you know those couples that entered the fitness championships and they look like they have eating disorders and they look as sick as a healthy person could ever look.
54:27🔗AdamAnd it looks like if you handed them a glass they would just crush it. They would snap the stem off if you handed them a wine glass. They're so like tense.
54:38🔗AdamYeah. But it's not muscular so much. It's just that they look like dead all the time. Like they're taking a crap everywhere. They're too tan and the guys are all shaved and oh Jesus.
54:49🔗DrewCarrie, Carrie, you have a major problem on your hands here. Do you understand that?
54:56🔗DrewThis is this is profound addictive disease and amphetamines will bring him down in a big way. He will start to get paranoid. He will start to have memory problems and mood disturbances. And some of this can be permanent. And this is not going to stop without treatment. I guarantee it.
55:54🔗CallerYou know, as far as I know, he's not doing anything illegal. It's just the stuff that he takes. I don't know if it has anything, if it kills.
56:00🔗DrewCarrie, Carrie, Carrie, I don't know where to start with you.
56:21🔗DrewYou have a really terrible problem on your hands here and he needs to see someone about this. And until he gets paranoid and shoots somebody, I suggest you take care of this.
56:32🔗AdamDrew, would you suggest that he talk to the officer psychologist? Yeah. You know, that really super hot chick who I see in the movies, the ballistic expert? Oh, no, that's the blonde.
56:47🔗AdamYeah. No, this is the police psychologist who's ultra hot. She wears those real smart AM Taylor business suits and she shows a lot of legs.
56:59🔗DrewThe blonde here, just above the shoulder.
57:00🔗AdamNo, the blonde is the ballistic expert. Yeah, but the brown. Brown, brown, smart, and wears a very stylishly framed glasses because you can't tell when a chick is super hot. She puts on a pair of prescription glasses. You see Cindy Crawford wearing her reading glasses. You walk right past her, but she pulls those off and does that head fling. You're on it. Yeah, he should go talk to the ultra, ultra, ultra super on fire hot police psychologist. I've never, all I've known, I've never seen one I've realized, but I've never, every movie I've ever seen, they're super hot.
57:34🔗DrewI've just moved to TV, that's a TV connection.
57:35🔗AdamOh, TV too, and they're sexed up. They want sex.
57:54🔗CallerYeah, I mean, I've had the same girlfriend for about a year and a half, and we've been using condoms for about the last three months, and I cannot come with a condom for the life of me. She was on the pill for about a year, and she didn't like that, and so we tried to use condoms, and it's not working for me.
58:16🔗DrewYeah. Have you tried different brands of condoms?
58:17🔗CallerOh, I've tried everything on the market.
58:20🔗DrewReally? What about her going back on the pill? Maybe trying some different pills.
58:27🔗CallerThe pills really lowered her libido. I mean, she was not into sex at all.
58:47🔗CallerShe was on that for about eight months.
58:49🔗DrewYeah, but she should try some other pills. There are many different sort of mixtures out there of hormones that can be less likely to cause that particular side effect.
58:58🔗AdamIt's a tough cell, though. You know what I mean? When you've tried the pill, it didn't make you feel very good. It's sort of a commitment. You can't just try it one night and try another one the next night. It's a tough cell for a guy to get his girlfriend on to that stuff. How about she just polishes you off with a little oral like Drew does?
59:15🔗CallerThat's fine. I mean, if I take the condom off, I mean, five minutes later, it's done, you know? But, you know, it's nice to come in the act, you know? And it's just not happening.
59:55🔗AdamHold on, new record. Took Drew one hour and 12 minutes before he punched a microphone tonight. See, it's a new personal best for you, Drew. He's been averaging three to six minutes into the show.
1:00:07🔗DrewThis brings you it too, in the stand. Yeah. Uh, Marie, so what's the deal?
1:00:11🔗GuestI don't enjoy sex. I've been having sex for about a year and a half now, and I don't dislike it, but I can't get an orgasm.
1:01:15🔗AdamNot every day, but a lot of times a day. Yeah. I see. I don't, I don't. I understand. It's all coming into focus now. At one point in the call, I thought it was every day. Now I realize.
1:02:21🔗AdamSo true. Oh my God. Is that true? Guys, you know what I'm talking about? Jesus Christ, like I had some kind of curse with that. I swear to God.
1:02:29🔗DrewYeah, Adam, there's only one variable here that's fixed.
1:02:36🔗AdamHow dare you bring that up in front of this lively partisan crowd? Humiliate me. Jesus. But okay, listen, you're having an orgasm and it's through oral sex and it gives you oral sex every day that you have sex?
1:03:24🔗AdamWell, okay, but don't tell him you've been faking for the last year. Just tell him to perform some oral sex on you and let him finish you off, all right? That's understood. You get no rhythm after a while. You learned to accept defeat.
1:03:41🔗GuestOkay, okay. I got a pap smear done and it came back with some sort of abnormal, abnormally. And I'm wondering if that could be caused of it's STD or is it something having to do with my cervix or anything like that?
1:04:01🔗DrewThat is ward virus more often than not, okay? And that could be an STD.
1:04:05🔗AdamFantastic. Sleep well, honey. Here we go. Just see the crabs are in STD. It's one or the other. Good night. Let's go to the next call, Drew. What are you doing over there?
1:04:16🔗DrewI'm having trouble getting my, there we go.
1:04:39🔗AdamAnd yeah, five minutes is a long time. I mean, if you think about, you know, holding your breath for five minutes or getting in the ring with Tyson or, you know, at times it takes the...
1:04:51🔗GuestNot seriously though. You know, my sex life with my girlfriend has gone downhill within the past four or five months or so.
1:05:06🔗GuestI don't know. I don't know. You know, when we first started going together, we first started going together a couple years ago, it was awesome, but...
1:05:16🔗AdamMaybe your penis has gotten lazy. You know, your penis is no different than an employee.
1:05:23🔗AdamYour penis is an employee of the vagina. It works for the vagina. Okay. You punch in, you know, and on the first day, first day on the job, what's that employee like, Drew?
1:05:33🔗AdamTen minutes early, right? Yes, sir. No, sir. Want a little more coffee, Mr. Vagina? You're looking good today, Mr. Vagina. That's a smart tie you're wearing, Mr. Vagina. Yeah, sure. I can see how you got to the middle. You're very smart, very sharp. But what do you like after a year number two of your job? You're stealing stuff from the supply room. You know what I'm saying? You're showing up late. You're punching in for other people. Your lunches have gone from 30 minutes to an hour and 30 minutes. Friday is Rum Friday.
1:06:59🔗AdamYou tried that? Keep doing it. I don't know.
1:07:02🔗DrewI think there's something wrong with his relationship. He's sort of overwhelmed for some reason.
1:07:06🔗AdamHe doesn't seem too enthusiastic about it.
1:07:08🔗DrewNo, he seems so anxious and so sort of like lost at it. You can imagine if you're not in command of yourself, you're lost in that relationship and unclear what's going on. Things can happen.
1:07:19🔗AdamSo maybe not in command of yourself, you mean not in command of your penis?
1:07:23🔗DrewI think that's sort of a metaphor for that too. Yeah. Dave 20.
1:07:32🔗AdamYou'd be like, would you say you're a sergeant, your penis is a private or you'd be like a general, and your penis would be maybe just off the bus from the enlistment office? So you're saying, Drew, you are a four-star general and your penis is a recruit that just got off a bus from Iowa.
1:07:53🔗DrewNo, he'd probably be a major. Oh, really?
1:08:06🔗GuestQuick question. A couple of questions, actually. Every time I have sex with my girlfriend, maybe a day or two after, I notice that I get this rash on the head of my penis, with pimple-like, like pimple-like, and it burns.
1:08:56🔗DrewBecause it could be herpes, it could be some allergy, could be just eczema or something, but are you using a condom?
1:09:02🔗GuestUm, well, that's another thing that she, every time we use a condom, she actually just went in to the doctor about this, that there's something wrong with her vagina accepting a condom, that she gets an outburst every time.
1:09:15🔗DrewDoesn't accept the vagina, doesn't accept the condom.
1:09:17🔗AdamSo you're saying her vagina gets an outburst?
1:09:19🔗GuestOr something, I don't know, that even the doctor prescribed that she cannot...
1:09:22🔗DrewNo, the vagina doesn't accept the condom.
1:09:54🔗DrewI'm glad she's being taken care of, but it doesn't sound like they have a clear diagnosis for her either, so...
1:09:59🔗AdamDrew, I know we're running late for break, but aren't we getting close... Because you say a doctor has to look at the condition when you're having the condition.
1:10:07🔗DrewNo, with herpes, it's kind of a clinical diagnosis. That's why you need to do this.
1:10:11🔗AdamSo that's yes. Right. Now, aren't we getting to the point where one could take a picture of one's junk...
1:10:18🔗DrewAnd send it over the web or something?
1:10:55🔗AdamYes, this is Loveline. There we go with the microphone. I'm Adam Corolla. That is my partner over there, Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. We're at the Television and Radio Museum tonight in beautiful Beverly Hills doing a live broadcast. Drew, here we go.
1:11:17🔗GuestHi. My question is, is that my husband and I suspect that his father, who's in his 50s, is having a serious sexual identity crisis. He's on his third marriage and with each relationship, he has verbally and mentally abused each woman. And with his first two wives, there was also some physical abuse.
1:11:47🔗GuestHe has a very difficult time dealing with strong women, and we think he may be gay or bisexual. And we felt that way for some time. Well, the clincher is that we're all in business together, and recently my husband and I were clearing out the history cache on our web browser and came across many sites that our father had searched during his work week. And these were all, the majority of them were all porn sites, both male and female, but primarily gay porn sites on sexuality.
1:12:16🔗AdamWell, he's definitely gay. Listen, that stuff is revolting to heterosexual guys. If I see any guy getting cornholed, I will heave.
1:12:27🔗GuestWell, and that's what I asked my husband.
1:12:30🔗AdamRight after I masturbate, I will heave.
1:12:32🔗GuestYeah, that's what I sort of thought, because initially I was like, well, maybe my husband, but then I'm like, you would never really go to those sites, and he's like, why would I?
1:12:40🔗AdamI have told my dad many, many times, I said, Dad, listen, I just sat him down the other day, we're eating lunch, I said, Dad, listen, I'm a big celebrity. You're nothing.
1:12:49🔗AdamI'm a B slash C celebrity who's had a couple of cable shows in his day and a semi-national radio show. You're nothing. If you ever decide to become a woman or go gay on me, I will have a Drifter kill you. So help me Christ, you'll be gone. You understand? You should have that conversation with him.
1:13:12🔗GuestWe don't have a problem necessarily if that's his choice. And our concern, we just want him to be happy and he's having troubles again now in his third marriage. And my husband is truly the only person that my father-in-law trusts and respects. My husband is the only child and my father-in-law has raised him as a single parent for many years. The question we have, knowing that we know now, and he has approached us a number of times trying to open a dialogue about-
1:14:04🔗AdamAll right, listen, what kind of store? Do you guys have a Christmas and July store over at the mall? Because if so, that's gay. What do you guys run there?
1:15:17🔗AdamOkay. All right. Oh, boy. I'll tell you. What would you do if your dad came out?
1:15:24🔗GuestHe was gay. Would you be all right with that? You would?
1:15:28🔗AdamYou know you wouldn't. See, what Drew is thinking right now is he's picturing himself strangling his gay dad, and but he's going, my Christ, I'm on the radio. So he just takes a long pause, which is that's admittance of guilt.
1:17:38🔗AdamRight. It's like, it's like when, when stuff smells so bad, it eventually starts smelling like pizza.
1:17:44🔗DrewIt's like what happens to dogs. Right.
1:17:47🔗AdamI decided that because dogs' nose was like a thousand times more sensitive than a man's nose and that they actually stuff their face in other dogs' fresh fecal matter in the park, that the fact that it was a thousand times more sensitive than their man's did not make it smell a thousand times worse, that eventually you go around and it smells like pizza.
1:18:11🔗AdamRight. Eventually, right, it becomes overwhelming and it starts smelling like pizza. And you're saying that these sleeving pills will start smelling like pizza eventually.
1:18:18🔗DrewThat's right. That's what I'm saying. All right. Melissa.
1:18:20🔗AdamI take four when I get home. Is that good?
1:18:22🔗DrewNo. Melissa, 22. You can also get, if there is Tylenol in these things, you can get liver failure from like eight.
1:18:27🔗AdamWell, but I always wash them down with booze.
1:18:44🔗DrewNo, she means why haven't you had sex, right? Is that what you mean?
1:18:46🔗AdamThe gynecologist is like, well, let's see. Let me get the speculum in there. Let me get some of these cobwebs out of the way. All right. Here we go. There it is.
1:18:57🔗DrewI don't see how you can really get HPV without having been sexually active.
1:19:02🔗AdamWhy haven't you been sexually active at the ripe old age of 22?
1:19:05🔗CallerI've had boyfriends, but I guess they've always just not thought they were the one.
1:19:42🔗DrewI'm just trying to figure out how you...
1:19:42🔗CallerI'm just wondering if they could have mixed up my slide results or like how I could have ended up being told that I had abnormal results to a pap with no sexual...
1:19:50🔗DrewWell, you couldn't have abnormal results without HPV.
1:19:57🔗CallerNo, they just said they would be doing screaming for it.
1:19:59🔗DrewWell, you just have an abnormal pap. Drew, hold on.
1:20:01🔗AdamWhy have we had a hundred of these calls lately? Here's how it goes. I'm no gynecologist, but I'm fast becoming one from doing this show. They get down there, they do the pap smear. They find abnormal cells, right? Now, that doesn't mean cancer.
1:20:16🔗DrewIt could mean inflammation. It could mean HPV.
1:20:20🔗AdamIt means something. That's the reason why you do the pap smear, so that they can find abnormal cells, which means this could be pre-cancerous, pre-
1:20:30🔗DrewThe first go-round usually means look again, look for more.
1:20:34🔗AdamWhy can't they figure out what the abnormal cells mean? Can't they read the abnormal cells?
1:20:40🔗DrewCan't they go to these? Sometimes they can.
1:20:42🔗AdamThis is my crotch sniffing dog, sure as hell I can tell what's going on in there. They know the difference between cancer and warts. Hell yeah. The beagle knows cancer and the Dalmatian knows warts. They call him Wardy. That's his name. Randy 18. No, no, we're going to break.
1:21:06🔗GuestYeah, um, today I went to school, right? And my friend, like, Viagra's police told it from his dad. And he gave it to me. And I took it. And I've been having, like, a heart attack, like, all day.
1:22:31🔗AdamWe have had like ten of these the last three nights. Here it is.
1:22:35🔗GuestEvery time I go, you know, my balls, they weigh like 30 pounds, you know.
1:22:43🔗AdamAny time it sounds like Cheech and or Chung is calling this show with his nuts that were too big to lift into the back of the minivan, just hang up on them. So stop trying to help people, Drew.
1:25:18🔗AdamYeah, it's very beautiful. Listen, listen, that's, listen, listen, all you nipple-piercing nutjobs and you vagina-holer-poker-inners. Listen, you screwballs, that is one area you don't need to work on. That's fine. I see some boobs, I don't need any jewelry hanging off of them. That's fine.
1:25:36🔗GuestI like boobs. Boobs are jewelry, you understand?
1:25:40🔗AdamYou want to do something, you get a nose job. You do something about that bad haircut your friends won't tell you about. You do something with that big ass. You work on the cottage cheese and the cellulite and the varicose veins. You do something with that. Don't worry about dressing up the vagina, that's fine. All of you screwballs. Who sees that? You know what I mean?
1:27:03🔗AdamStop trying to run my life. I feel like I'm in a cage.
1:27:08🔗GuestHow did you guys get something happened to me, Adam?
1:27:11🔗AdamListen, you want to get your labia pierced. That means something's wrong. Now we're getting little flashes of it with controlling mom. When did you lose your virginity?
1:27:56🔗DrewIt's probably nobody. It's amazing how little does happen in point of view.
1:27:59🔗AdamYou know, you chicks are so screwy with that. I do it for me. I do it for me. I know it. Why are you buying that lingerie? I buy it for me. I wear it for me. I feel sexy.
1:28:12🔗DrewI did a program with one of these piercing guys who was adamant that we didn't understand this was a rite of passage and there was a reclaiming of one's, I don't know, something.
1:28:20🔗AdamListen, is he Samoan? Even if you are a white guy from Orange County.
1:28:25🔗DrewSo now you got a bunch of stuff on you, what's changed? What's different? Except you made a statement that you've done something to your body.
1:28:32🔗AdamDrew, when you see a chandelier hanging from a guy's dork, you've made a very strong statement. You really asserted yourself.
1:28:43🔗AdamHave fun all you screwballs. You're not fooling me. All you idiots with all your tats and piercings and your big jacked up jeeps with your god damn ski racks all over the place and your snowboard hanging out every window of every car and your big malamute everywhere. You idiots, you guys out of your Mountain Dew commercials. You're not fooling me. Go ahead.
1:29:16🔗AdamOf any kind. Through dress or appearance. It drives me nuts. I don't like any of them. I don't like the biker guys. These guys are clods. You idiots with the... You guys who like to take the muffler off your Harley and have the thing bored and stroked and then drive up a canyon at four in the morning and wake up every goddamn person in the neighborhood. I like to take a half and crowbar to your head, you pigs. And all you guys, you homos with your mock turtlenecks and your two-tone hair and you yuppie guys. And all you, all you, you bodybuilder guys and all you, you like, you mummy rockin guys who wear the black trench coats. And every one of you who's trying to make a statement through your parents, I wish you'd just go kill yourselves. I really do. I can't stand looking at any of you. And all I see is one big neurotic, screwed up ball of person coming down the street. And that goes for you women too. All you Pam Anderson wannabes, you female female impersonators. Oh, with your 11-inch stiletto heels and fake boobs. And you chicks who think it looks good to draw an outline of your lips around your lips. You screw balls. You're black chicks with your hair extensions everywhere. And you idiot guys, black guys who look like Puff Daddy and all this attitude. Who are you guys fooling? Just a bunch of scared kids. Please, trying to change everything. Somehow, the way we look at you is going to change the way you look at you. Well, it ain't working.
1:31:38🔗GuestMy friend asked me to call you because I've been raped three times by three different guys. And I'm married right now and he asked me to forget it.
1:31:54🔗AdamHave you ever got any therapy for this? It worked. Are you in therapy now?
1:32:03🔗GuestNo. I was at home with my parents in therapy and I moved away and I got married. His friend came over and did this to me and both of them asked me to just forget it.
1:32:15🔗AdamHis friend raped you? Yes. This guy is an idiot. He is dangerous. You are only with him because you were created. You are acting out. Do you have any kids with him?
1:32:29🔗AdamPlease. I will give you a hundred dollars every year you don't have a kid with this guy. How about getting out of this relationship? The guy is an idiot. It is doomed.
1:33:54🔗AdamAll right. I want to thank everyone over here at the Television and Radio Museum for facilitating this tonight, making it happen, and doing all the hard work. And again, the good people who came out and supported us this evening. And so until next time, and producer and Anderson back in the home base at Westwood One, and Ann for doing all the work, and Sarah for doing a great job on the phones tonight. And until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.
1:34:22🔗GuestWell, I was wondering like, like, what, what, what's more?
1:34:31🔗GuestThis has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is the presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.