Episode 1000754887896

0:01 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience. Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Listener discretion advised. Now, here's Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191 with Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla.

0:14 Voiceover What are you insane?

1:54 Adam I am not sure many adults out there really care.

1:57 Dr. Bruce Thank you. No.

1:58 Adam And how would you negotiate? What did you have to negotiate? He wouldn't negotiate with you?

2:02 Dr. Bruce He wouldn't.

2:03 Adam He did the only intelligence thing.

2:04 Dr. Bruce I had been destroying the poor bastard so badly that at a certain point, he was not ready to negotiate anywhere. He was not willing to. And he pulled the car over and he said he will not drive and we can sit here all night. I tried to sort of smoke him out, but it didn't happen. And I had to get out of the car, but we compromised. I could ride on the outside of the car.

2:24 Adam Well, I'm glad that with your celebrity status that you still appreciate gas.

2:29 Dr. Bruce I forgot about that story. Someone reminded me just a half hour ago. Nicole?

2:33 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

2:33 Dr. Bruce You're 13.

2:34 Dr. Bruce Yes.

2:35 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

2:38 Dr. Bruce My, I've got boys that are like always looking at me because I'm big-breasted. Yeah.

2:44 Dr. Bruce And I don't know what to do.

2:48 Dr. Bruce How big-breasted are you?

2:49 Dr. Bruce I'm a 36C. Yeah.

2:52 Dr. Bruce That's pretty good size for a 13-year-old, right?

2:57 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

2:57 Dr. Bruce But it's not grotesquely big.

3:00 Adam It's not grotesquely big, but it's anything different than average when you're 13. Creates an opportunity for especially the boys to be boys. Right.

3:10 Dr. Bruce Later on, it'll open other doors. But for now, it's a pain in the ass. So what are you doing about it?

3:17 Dr. Bruce I'm just kind of ignoring them.

3:20 Dr. Bruce Yeah. All right.

3:22 Dr. Bruce Pretty much.

3:23 Adam But it's pretty stressful, huh?

3:24 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

3:24 Adam And then they're paying attention to you and you think it's because of that.

3:28 Dr. Bruce Yeah. They're like always asking me out and all kinds of other stuff.

3:33 Dr. Bruce Well, maybe there's other parts that they like about you too, though. May not only be the brass.

3:39 Adam Maybe the immature boys are asking her out and it's more frustration.

3:44 Dr. Bruce Well, I mean, give yourself a little more credit. I mean, maybe have a nice smile to boot.

3:52 Adam Nicole, you know what? Do you talk to friends about it?

3:55 Dr. Bruce I think it's her gift with the English language that attracts the boys.

4:01 Adam She has that beautiful accent, though. I like that.

4:03 Dr. Bruce She does?

4:04 Adam Yeah. Where are you from?

4:06 Dr. Bruce Austin, Texas.

4:07 Dr. Bruce Well, that's quite an exotic locale, Bruce. You have a keen ear for dialects.

4:15 Adam Nicole, do you have any friends that have the same problem or anybody you can talk to? Because sometimes, really, just talking it out. And boys aren't going to change. They tend to do that.

4:25 Dr. Bruce And well, here's my point. Don't assume they're only asking you out because you have nice breasts. I mean, you're 13. I'm sure you're attractive. And there's other 13-year-old girls who are attractive, who don't have large breasts, who get asked out as well.

4:42 Adam Well, I guess how old are the boys that are asking you out?

4:45 Dr. Bruce 14 and 15.

4:48 Adam Adam makes a good point.

4:50 Dr. Bruce I mean, why do you assume they don't like you? Why do you assume it's only your breasts?

4:56 Dr. Bruce Because they ask me to do stuff.

4:59 Dr. Bruce Like what?

5:06 Dr. Bruce Like, go to bed with them and stuff.

5:09 Dr. Bruce Oh, okay. Well, listen, they're not great guys and you're not going out with them, right?

5:16 Dr. Bruce One I went out with.

5:17 Dr. Bruce You did?

5:18 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

5:19 Dr. Bruce How old was he?

5:20 Dr. Bruce He was 14.

5:21 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

5:22 Adam Did you do anything?

5:23 Dr. Bruce No.

5:24 Dr. Bruce Okay. Well, fine. All right. Listen, Nicole, everybody has a part on them they'd like to change when they're 13. Your parts are a little bit bigger, but don't worry. You'll be glad you have them one day. There may be a little bit of a pain in the ass, a little bit of a nuisance now, but don't worry. I mean, listen.

5:44 Adam I just have one more thing to say.

5:45 Dr. Bruce This is not even a question.

5:49 Adam All right. Nicole.

5:50 Dr. Bruce No, she's not talking back to you. All right.

5:53 Adam I just want to tell you, you were one of those immature, breast-conscious 13, 14-year-old boys.

5:59 Dr. Bruce Yes.

5:59 Adam Even now, you have the insight to see that that behavior was, it wasn't a good idea, it wouldn't be a good idea for the girls to give into that kind of behavior.

6:08 Dr. Bruce No, but-

6:08 Adam There's a lot of pure pressure at that age.

6:11 Dr. Bruce Sure.

6:12 Adam Okay. Okay.

6:13 Dr. Bruce But listen, I just want to say this one more time, as I said a few times on the show. Men are attracted to women's physicality, and especially at 13, 14, 15, whatever, they're attracted to the way the woman looks, and whether that's her legs, or her long blonde hair, or her big blue eyes, or her shapely ass, or her large breasts, it's just another physical attribute that men are attracted to, and women freak out that men are attracted to the breasts, but they wouldn't freak out, and they look at it as very normal when all the boys are attracted to a girl who has blonde hair and long tan legs. It's just another physical attribute that boys are attracted to. So I'm saying, if they're attracted to a part, whether it's your ass, your boobs, your legs, or your hair, it's still a part, enjoy. That's all. Thank you. Everyone makes a big deal over the breasts, but let me tell you, every 15-year-old is attracted to girls by the way they look. So maybe it's not their breasts, it's another part. Who cares? Why are you so mature? Because they got a nice ass, and you'd rather stare at their ass and their breasts? That makes you some sort of evolved creature? Please.

7:27 Dr. Bruce Okay.

7:28 Dr. Bruce I know, I got a little cathartic there for a second. Romero?

7:32 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

7:32 Dr. Bruce You're 16.

7:34 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

7:35 Dr. Bruce I got this hairy back, it's like, not hairy yet, but it's coming in. I don't know if I should shave it, but I actually heard that some girls thought it was sexy.

7:42 Adam Cut it and save it, or?

7:44 Dr. Bruce The hair on your back?

7:45 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

7:46 Dr. Bruce Well, you're getting hair on your back at 16?

7:49 Dr. Bruce Yeah, it's like starting to come in.

7:50 Adam Well, you start cutting it a lot, you're going to need a lawn mower within a few years.

7:54 Dr. Bruce Really?

7:55 Adam No, I really thought that would be funny.

7:59 Dr. Bruce If I expected a joke, it would have been, but I didn't know you kidded. Hey, does hair grow back thicker when you shave it off? Is that a wives' tale? I heard it was. Do you know anything about that?

8:12 Adam I'm thinking, I'm thinking. I don't know anything about that. Back here, body here, it's just not going to do any good. But it's, the only way to get rid of the hair there, you have laser techniques today to permanently eliminate it. Most of the other methods are not really that effective.

8:29 Dr. Bruce I got the laser on my neck.

8:32 Adam It worked?

8:34 Dr. Bruce That's what I love about Bruce. That's why you're such a horrible host. I make a comment like that and instead of, huh, what, let me see that, it's, uh-huh. All right, anyways, go to the next call. All right, listen.

8:46 Adam Should he shave it? No, he shouldn't shave it, but he should be comfortable with it. This is an, again, he's an adolescent. Shave it, shave it.

8:52 Dr. Bruce Chicks can't-

8:52 Dr. Bruce Do girls find it sexy, though?

8:53 Dr. Bruce No. What are you, nuts?

8:55 Adam You know what they find sexy? A guy that's comfortable with himself the way he is.

8:58 Dr. Bruce No, they don't find that sexy. They're like a nice bare guy without any hair on his back. Women do not like a hairy back.

9:07 Disqualified!

9:09 Dr. Bruce That's right. They do not like it and the ones that say they do are lying. They just don't. I don't know what's wrong with them. Because a lot of guys have hair on their back, but women don't dig it.

9:19 Adam So what's Romero going to do now that you gave him that great savior?

9:21 Dr. Bruce He's going to shave his back.

9:23 Dr. Bruce No, not shave.

9:23 Adam Wax. Wax it, right?

9:25 Dr. Bruce You can't shave your back.

9:27 Adam Sure you can.

9:27 Dr. Bruce Not by yourself.

9:29 Dr. Bruce Well, it depends.

9:30 Dr. Bruce You're going to have to get somebody to help you out.

9:34 Adam But if you shave it, it's going to be like you got a beard on your back.

9:37 Dr. Bruce And then it's going to come in stubbly.

9:38 Dr. Bruce You don't see anything.

9:39 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

9:40 Dr. Bruce He should just go get it waxed.

9:42 Dr. Bruce All right.

9:43 Adam So I take these tattoos off even a lot of the guys. And I talk to them about it. And lots of them are asking me, what about hair removal? So there are a lot of guys that are interested in hair removal on the backs.

9:54 Dr. Bruce I had it done. I told you.

9:57 Adam I wasn't using you as a representative individual for the human race.

10:01 Dr. Bruce I like to throw that stuff out once in a while to Bruce, just to see how much bad radio we can do. Long pauses and then no follow up questions.

10:11 Adam I'm not. I'm trying to irritate you.

10:12 Dr. Bruce So I'm doing a fine job, Bruce. I'm telling you, it is playing handball against the Drapery with you. That is the kind of satisfaction I get. Mike. Yeah, you're 16.

10:25 Dr. Bruce Yeah. Um, all right. Like I got this problem, right? Um, when I have my girlfriend, all right, usually when we first got like started like about two months ago, it would take like two, three minutes to get off like the first time, right?

10:38 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

10:39 Dr. Bruce But like now it would take like 35 minutes to get off like the third or fourth time, right? But now it's like like 35 minutes to get off the first time.

10:48 Dr. Bruce Hold on. Let me do some math here. You'd have your first orgasm in two minutes, two, three minutes. Two, three minutes. And then you skipped off to the fourth time. What about the second, third time?

11:00 Dr. Bruce All right. Second time would be like five minutes later and like seven minutes later, something like that.

11:05 Dr. Bruce Okay. Now, wait a minute. First orgasm took you two minutes. And then how long a break did you take?

11:14 Dr. Bruce Between like having sex or like between like each orgasm.

11:19 Dr. Bruce Okay. Between each orgasm.

11:22 Dr. Bruce I don't know. It would be about seven minutes, eight minutes thing, something like that.

11:26 Dr. Bruce And then another orgasm?

11:28 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

11:29 Dr. Bruce Okay. So one at two minutes, then one would, the next one would be like at the nine minute mark, right?

11:35 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

11:36 Dr. Bruce Because I added the two minutes to that.

11:38 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

11:38 Dr. Bruce Okay. Then we got nine minutes. Then when's the third one?

11:43 Dr. Bruce About seven minutes later.

11:45 Dr. Bruce Seven minutes later. So that's at the 16 minute mark. And then the fourth orgasm.

11:51 Dr. Bruce Would probably be about nine minutes later, but like, it happened at different times.

11:57 Dr. Bruce Yeah. Let me do some math here. So that's at about the 20th.

12:00 Dr. Bruce Like the time would be like a different time frame.

12:03 Dr. Bruce Right. But this is a rough estimate. That's about the 25 minute mark.

12:06 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

12:07 Dr. Bruce Okay. And then the fifth and sixth orgasm?

12:11 Dr. Bruce I usually only have like five. I'm not like a ten guy.

12:14 Dr. Bruce What kind of man are you?

12:16 Dr. Bruce Oh, okay. Please.

12:18 Dr. Bruce Four or five orgasms in what? 40 minutes?

12:22 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

12:22 Dr. Bruce Please.

12:23 Adam A bogus call. It must be.

12:24 Dr. Bruce Please.

12:24 Dr. Bruce No, I'm serious.

12:26 Dr. Bruce And you can do this stuff when you're 16. Don't you remember that, Bruce?

12:30 Adam I'd recommend abstinence, Mike. Yeah. How long have you been involved with the girl?

12:35 Dr. Bruce About two months. Yeah. We actually, I've known her for about three, four years. But we got together about three months ago when we started starting having sex about two months ago.

12:48 Dr. Bruce Jesus, this guy is amazing. You know what happens, Mike, when you get a little bit older? You get to my age and Bruce's age, you plan your multi-orgasms. It's like, baby, I'm going to have one, then five minutes later, I'm going to have another, then I'm going to tell myself off and I'm going for the hand trick. Then it's like, fast forward ten minutes. That's it for the month. You do not get three, four, and five off anymore. Your nuts would fly off, you ricochet, break a window, go into the neighbor's yard. You'd have to hang your head out, you know, a little help.

13:26 Adam So you talk to your girlfriend about this. Does she have any thoughts? Is she concerned about it?

13:31 Dr. Bruce Or just concerned about what? What's going on?

13:34 Adam Well, he's concerned calling in. He's taking too long. This is this feedback from her.

13:38 Dr. Bruce Is this? I don't know. I don't know if it's like normal or should I like get them like doctoring help or what?

13:44 Dr. Bruce Well, now the first one takes how long to happen?

13:47 Adam Three, five minutes.

13:48 Dr. Bruce It takes a pretty long time.

13:50 Dr. Bruce So all right. So you do one now, right?

13:52 Dr. Bruce I do one or two. Yeah.

13:54 Dr. Bruce Good. Join the club. That's fine. You're 16.

13:58 Dr. Bruce But does it take that long usually?

14:00 Dr. Bruce Yes.

14:01 Dr. Bruce It does.

14:02 Dr. Bruce Listen, it varies from penis to penis. All right, Mike?

14:06 Adam How often are you having sex?

14:07 Dr. Bruce I've been doing that like long, about one. Yeah.

14:12 Dr. Bruce All right. I know. You got dealt a rough hand in life, you know, Mike? It's tough. All right. Don't masturbate for a week and see what happens.

14:21 Dr. Bruce All right.

14:22 Dr. Bruce All right. Thanks a lot.

14:23 Dr. Bruce All right. He didn't have a question.

14:27 Adam And he's bragging.

14:28 Dr. Bruce Yes, he's bragging. That was, we get those a couple of times a week. It is, I cannot ride a bicycle because my penis is too big, Cole. What do I do?

14:39 Adam Aren't you concerned? I get a little bit concerned about the 16 year olds dating two months, having sex on a regular basis, starting to focus in on sex. Probably, like the guy last night, abstinence based relationships.

14:51 Dr. Bruce No, I know. Bruce, I know your thing. You didn't get laid in high school, and now you're in a one man crusade for no one else to get laid in high school. I'm the same way. I'm with you, brother. It drives me nuts to hear what these 16 year olds are doing. These guys are having threesomes.

15:06 Adam Seriously, they're really not mature enough to be involved in that kind of activity.

15:11 Dr. Bruce Well, I don't know. Maybe they are. I mean, look at them.

15:14 Adam They tend to get locked into the relationship because they're sexually active and it's a very intense experience and it becomes, you know, 16, there shouldn't be those kind of ties in a relationship.

15:23 Dr. Bruce There shouldn't be, but what are you going to do?

15:25 Adam Nothing. Just to hear you support my point of view a little bit because, you know, it's...

15:31 Dr. Bruce Listen, I don't think people should get driver's licenses until they're one year younger than whatever year I am currently in. You know what I mean? I mean, listen, I don't think 16-year-olds should be driving cars. I would have been pissed if I was 16 and heard someone talking that way. You know what I'm saying? I'm for all that kind of stuff, but it's never going to happen. Elizabeth.

15:54 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

15:54 Dr. Bruce You're 23.

15:56 Dr. Bruce Yes.

15:57 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

15:59 Dr. Bruce First, let me say that I am not at all trying to advocate. I know the only, if you want to have.

16:09 Dr. Bruce Hold on.

16:09 Dr. Bruce Let me write this down.

16:10 Dr. Bruce This is good. I'm not communicating very well. If you aren't wanting to get pregnant or getting STD from sex, obviously, protecting yourself. But my sister had told me the other day that if after, once you've ovulated, you cannot then get pregnant.

16:33 Dr. Bruce Now, is that true?

16:34 Adam Well, you ovulate. That's how you get pregnant.

16:36 Dr. Bruce Well, no.

16:36 Adam Pop the egg out and.

16:38 Dr. Bruce If you have intercourse after you've ovulated, then she said, then you cannot get pregnant.

16:43 Dr. Bruce That's when you get pregnant, right?

16:45 Dr. Bruce That's what I was thinking. That's when it would make sense to me.

16:48 Dr. Bruce Before you've ovulated.

16:52 Adam These are not like missile launches where we have a timetable and they're there and then they're gone. The egg ovulates. It pops out and ovulates. And how do you know exactly when that happens, first of all? Secondly, when sperm are present, they have a certain lifespan. Things overlap, basically. So you can't. That made sense.

17:14 Dr. Bruce I know. It's just always great when you articulate yourself. Hands start flapping around.

17:19 Adam You like that, huh?

17:19 Dr. Bruce Hands start spinning around.

17:21 Adam If you're lucky this isn't TV, then you really have some problems.

17:24 Dr. Bruce Oh, that really killed me.

17:26 Adam So does that make sense? First of all, it sounds like she's giving advice. Don't worry about it. Once you've ovulated, you can't get pregnant.

17:32 Dr. Bruce Well, explain.

17:33 Adam How many kids does she have?

17:34 Dr. Bruce She had had five miscarriages. So she was... Oh, sorry. Hello?

17:39 Adam Maybe she thinks that's a form of birth control.

17:40 Dr. Bruce She now has a child, but she had had five miscarriages.

17:44 Dr. Bruce Jesus, five miscarriages.

17:46 Adam Which means her theory wasn't very good.

17:49 Dr. Bruce Well, maybe she was trying to get pregnant.

17:53 Dr. Bruce But she just was making a joke to me because I know when I'm ovulating, I can feel it, and she was just making a funny comment to me, well, now if you're going to have sex, now's the time.

18:08 Adam Right. Do you know what the opposite advice is you ever heard people say you can get pregnant anytime during your cycle? Well, you technically can't, but you just don't really know where you are.

18:16 Dr. Bruce All right.

18:17 Dr. Bruce All right.

18:18 Dr. Bruce Let's go over the ovulation process for a second. Is ovulation when the egg drops, is that the process of that happening?

18:28 Adam It pops out of the ovary, goes down the tube, and if there's sperm or there...

18:32 Dr. Bruce Is it ovulating? Is that the act of it coming down the tube, or does it ovulate?

18:39 Adam I know why you're doing this. You do this.

18:40 Dr. Bruce No, no. Listen to me. Listen to me. These are...

18:44 Adam You're gonna see me flail my arms and flap my lips.

18:46 Dr. Bruce No, no. I'm asking you questions that the ninth grade biology students should know. So just stay with me here for a second.

18:53 Adam You're doing it again, okay.

18:54 Dr. Bruce Just stay with me. When you're ovulating, okay, that is the process of the egg dropping.

19:02 Adam Right.

19:03 Dr. Bruce Okay, so that's ovulation.

19:05 Adam Right.

19:05 Dr. Bruce And so the egg doesn't really ovulate, the egg just sort of drops. And ovulate means drop. Is that true?

19:14 Adam I don't know what it means.

19:16 Dr. Bruce Okay, well we can get into that later. But the egg drops.

19:19 Adam It overexpels it, it goes down the tube. Right. And if the meat spur, the sperm along the way, then we have implantation.

19:26 Dr. Bruce And if it doesn't, how long does it hang out?

19:30 Adam I don't know. I don't know exactly how long it hangs out. I know the period of, the window of opportunity. I'm not sure exactly what that is.

19:37 Dr. Bruce Couple days?

19:39 Adam Less than that, I would say.

19:39 Dr. Bruce Less than that. Well, what happens to the egg?

19:43 Adam It's just expelled. It's not that easy.

19:45 Dr. Bruce Expelled where?

19:47 Adam It's not, this is not like you have a dozen eggs.

19:49 Dr. Bruce Your menstrual cycle takes it out, right? But most women ovulate about, what, 15 days?

19:56 Adam How big do you think this thing is? You're talking about microscopic stuff?

19:59 Dr. Bruce Hold on a second, though. Here's what I'm saying. Most women ovulate like two weeks after they're done with their menstrual cycle, correct? Right. That's the average. So, the most likely time, the highest incidence of pregnancy is probably two weeks, or 15, 16 days, after you've finished your pregnancy, right?

20:22 Adam I finished your menses.

20:23 Dr. Bruce Oh, your period, sorry. I'm very tired. So, let's just work on this count, and just stay with me. Don't start flailing around, Bruce, and jump in here because I know you're a new expert at this. You finished your menstrual cycle. It's now two weeks later, you ovulate. The egg drops down the fallopian tube there, and it gets down to the bottom of its run. Now it's there. Now, is it going to be? In your uterus. It's in your uterus. Is it going to be there for two weeks until you start the next menstrual cycle up again?

20:57 Adam No.

20:58 Dr. Bruce No. How big is this thing is? Well, just quiet down now. It'll be gone before that. Right. Right. It'll be it'll be schleffed off before or sleffed off before a day or two. And so really you can only get pregnant in that day or two when it's dropped down to the bottom. Right. Is that is that a safe statement? But the problem is, is you never know when that is. It's different for every woman. And if you're going at it five times a week without protection, you could you could come up snake eyes if you don't want to get pregnant. OK, there you go. Bruce, that was enlightening. Thank you very much. We're going to take ourselves a little break. Who are we going to talk to when we get back?

21:42 Adam We are going to hear about. Lindsay and her brother, who is into watching horror movies and there is now violence in the family. So we're going to solve the problem of a violent family.

21:54 Dr. Bruce Fascinating.

21:54 Adam I am going to solve the problem.

21:56 Dr. Bruce Try to work some Christianity into it. We'll be back after this.

22:00 Woodstock 99 pay-per-view. Where you can see more live as it happens, uncut and uncensored, than all of the 250,000 crazy fans who are actually there. July 23rd, 24th and 25th. 65 hours of today's hottest bands. Exclusive live performances only on Woodstock 99 pay-per-view. Call your cable or satellite company.

22:32 Dr. Bruce The phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191.

22:34 Dr. Bruce We'll be right back.

22:45 Dr. Bruce Love Lines W E B M It is me, it is Loveline, I'm Adam. That is Bruce, Dr. Bruce to you. Dr. Bruce is filling in for Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew, I think is in New York, where he's on one of his infamous...

23:26 Adam You know where.

23:27 Dr. Bruce Is he, where is he?

23:27 Adam Hawaii.

23:28 Dr. Bruce He's in Hawaii? Son of a bitch, he's in Hawaii, is he? I thought he was working.

23:33 Adam With sunscreen on.

23:34 Dr. Bruce Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. And when Drew says Hawaii, it means sex tour of the Philippines. That's different.

23:45 Adam That's what he always says. No matter where he is, that's what you say. He's either selling his children somewhere or he's on a sex tour.

23:52 Dr. Bruce It is, it is true. It is absolutely true. He'll be back to tell us all about it. Come Sunday. Meanwhile, Dr. Bruce is doing a fantastic job. Lindsay.

24:05 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

24:05 Dr. Bruce Hi.

24:06 Dr. Bruce You're 17.

24:07 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

24:08 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

24:08 Adam Sounds scared.

24:09 Dr. Bruce All right. I got my little brother hooked on horror movies. And now I completely screwed him over.

24:15 Adam How old is he?

24:16 Dr. Bruce He's 10.

24:19 Dr. Bruce Yeah. What's it done to him?

24:20 Dr. Bruce Well, he gets in a lot of fights now and he's just got out of elementary school. And he's been asking questions like whether or not it's legal to stab someone if it's in school and they hit you first.

24:32 Dr. Bruce Perfectly healthy, perfectly normal.

24:35 Adam Does he carry a knife?

24:37 Dr. Bruce No, no. He has pocket knives and he has like his collection of it. But and it started like when I started letting him watch horror movies.

24:44 Adam Yeah.

24:45 Dr. Bruce But what's where's your dad?

24:46 Dr. Bruce Yeah. My parents are both sleeping in the next room. I mean, we have a normal family.

24:51 Dr. Bruce You do. All right. Why don't you tell your folks?

24:54 Dr. Bruce I can't.

24:56 Dr. Bruce What do you mean you can't?

24:57 Adam What can't you tell them? What are you worried about telling them?

25:00 Dr. Bruce They kill me. I mean, I let them watch because it's radar and they don't let them watch radar.

25:05 Adam Well, what kind of movies? Name a few that he's been watching.

25:07 Dr. Bruce Spring, Spring 2, I know what you watched last summer.

25:10 Dr. Bruce I still know all those.

25:12 Dr. Bruce Yeah. But listen, I don't know what Bruce's take on this stuff was, but there's always been horror movies around. I mean, there really has. Well, healthy people are able to be exposed to certain things without snapping.

25:30 Adam But the intensity of those movies and a lot of them have elements that are...

25:35 Dr. Bruce They're intense, but I mean, you know, when I was a kid, it was like, I watched really, you know, Dawn of the Dead and, you know, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Carrie and...

25:50 Adam Well, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, that was probably...

25:52 Dr. Bruce The Exorcist.

25:53 Adam Well...

25:54 Dr. Bruce I mean, you know, these are pretty, were pretty heavy duty movies. It didn't make me want to go out and kill anybody, made me scared someone was going to kill me with a chainsaw, but I didn't want to kill anybody else with a chainsaw.

26:06 Adam Right. But these are movies that are, that are judged to be really inappropriate for people older than 10 years old.

26:15 Dr. Bruce Not great for a 10 year old, but if that information is coming into a 10 year old, being processed and being spat out with, if I want to stab someone at school, there's something wrong with that 10 year old.

26:29 Adam Right.

26:29 Dr. Bruce Okay.

26:30 Adam It's not just the movies.

26:31 Dr. Bruce That's why she needs to talk to her parents.

26:33 Adam Exactly.

26:34 Dr. Bruce That's all.

26:34 Adam But I think she is looking just to tell the parents that he's been watching those movies. I think it's his behavior.

26:39 Dr. Bruce Well, listen, I'll tell you. Put it this way, Lindsay. If you let your parents know that he saw one of these movies because of you, you may get in a certain amount of trouble. If he stabs someone at school, and then it works into the movies and you show in the movies, you're going to be in a whole s-load of trouble.

26:57 Adam Right. So let's ask her if she could just talk to the parents about his violent...

27:00 Dr. Bruce No. Lisa.

27:02 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

27:02 Dr. Bruce I just told her to go tell her parents. That's it. Lisa, you're 21.

27:08 Dr. Bruce I don't know where to start. I've been dating this guy pretty much on and kind of off for the past two years. And before it would be, we would be having sex and he would have an orgasm and then he would just die and be done for like the rest of the day. And then after that it started becoming like before sex, like we couldn't even have sex. And then just recently, the past like five times, it's been during sex, he's gone limp. I don't know if it's because of me or because he's gay. I just... I don't know.

27:41 Dr. Bruce Well, he's got to be gay.

27:42 Dr. Bruce He's a friend and he thinks that he's gay.

27:44 Dr. Bruce Sure, sure enough.

27:45 Adam How's the relationship otherwise?

27:48 Dr. Bruce I don't know. I don't know. It's been kind of... I don't know. I love him very much and he's a great guy, but...

27:57 Adam I mean, your communication, spending time together, what's that like compared to the way it used to be? How long have you been going out? Two years.

28:03 Dr. Bruce Pretty great. I mean, we're great friends. I mean, that's why we're still together.

28:06 Dr. Bruce But the relationship's dying.

28:09 Dr. Bruce Pretty much.

28:10 Dr. Bruce Yeah, you guys are just friends now.

28:12 Dr. Bruce Yeah, but we still have sex.

28:13 Dr. Bruce Well, you try, but he's having difficulty.

28:16 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

28:17 Adam I don't think that's a yardstick for being gay. I mean, how big is he?

28:20 Dr. Bruce I'm sorry?

28:22 Dr. Bruce No, it doesn't make him gay. It just means you guys are sort of at the end of your proverbial rope here with the relationship.

28:29 Dr. Bruce I am not gay. You think so? But why would we get along so good? It's just like our sex life. He's pretty much all...

28:34 Dr. Bruce Listen, Bruce and I get along pretty good, but our sex life, at least up until last night, has left something to be decided. Would you shut up? Shut up while I'm talking, would you?

28:43 Dr. Bruce Okay.

28:44 Dr. Bruce Jesus Christ. He doesn't masturbate?

28:47 Dr. Bruce No, not really.

28:47 Dr. Bruce Uh-oh, he's gay then.

28:49 Adam Wait a second.

28:50 Dr. Bruce Listen, who knows what the guy is, but I'm saying the relationship has run its course, okay?

28:56 Dr. Bruce All right.

28:56 Dr. Bruce You know that, right?

28:58 Dr. Bruce I don't know.

28:58 Dr. Bruce I mean, we get along really good.

29:01 Dr. Bruce I get along good with my sister. That doesn't mean anything.

29:05 Adam Yeah, did you know him while he was dating?

29:08 Dr. Bruce We're done. We're done. This thing's done. Tiffany?

29:14 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

29:14 Dr. Bruce You're 15.

29:15 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

29:15 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

29:17 Dr. Bruce Well, my mom has been recently dating this guy. Well, not really recently, but for almost two years. But we'll have talks and stuff, and she's trying to turn him into a father for a year. We'll have talks and stuff, and it will go into my self-esteem and help you look, well, at least you're not flat-chested, and you were camping. I wanted to go out to the pool, and I was in my bathing suit, and he's like, God, Ashley, if I was 16, 17, 18, 19, even 20, I'd take you out behind the shed. It's funny.

29:48 Dr. Bruce Did he have to cover that many years? 15, 16, 17, 18?

29:53 Adam How many beers had he had by then?

29:55 Dr. Bruce What?

29:56 Adam Had he been drinking?

29:57 Dr. Bruce Me?

29:58 Adam Him?

29:59 Dr. Bruce No, we had just gotten there.

30:02 Dr. Bruce Was he drinking on the drive over?

30:04 Dr. Bruce No, he doesn't drink. He's diabetic. So it's not really great for him to drink.

30:09 Adam Okay.

30:10 Dr. Bruce Let's figure out something. Where's your biological dad?

30:16 Dr. Bruce He lives in Montclair. And I see him on Tuesday and Thursday nights. We talk every night on the phone.

30:22 Dr. Bruce Every night?

30:24 Dr. Bruce What?

30:24 Dr. Bruce Yeah, so your biological dad is a decent guy.

30:27 Dr. Bruce Well, he's an alcoholic, but he's been sober for like 14 years now.

30:32 Dr. Bruce Okay.

30:33 Dr. Bruce And he's a decent guy.

30:35 Dr. Bruce He's a decent guy.

30:37 Dr. Bruce He's pretty cool.

30:38 Dr. Bruce Pretty cool. And why did your mom and he break up?

30:42 Dr. Bruce I'm not well, I was saved the marriage baby. So I don't know if that has any effect anyway. But like, I'm not really sure why they broke up. I think it was mostly because of the alcoholic, alcoholism. And my dad was kind of tight. And my mom likes to go out and buy Armani shoes and don't like carrying suits and that kind of thing. So it was like financial. And my mom was really controlling.

31:05 Dr. Bruce I got that she had joined the professional motocross circuit out of that. That's what I heard. Did you hear?

31:13 Dr. Bruce No, she likes to go out and buy like Armani.

31:15 Dr. Bruce She wanted to buy shoes. OK.

31:16 Dr. Bruce I like to go out and buy 500 bucks at night.

31:19 Dr. Bruce That's the beauty of women. Very pragmatic. Times are tight. The power has been shut off to the house. Let's buy our 350th pair of shoes.

31:30 Adam All right.

31:30 Dr. Bruce Listen, Tiffany, I'm trying to figure out what kind of person your mom is because I worry about this guy.

31:37 Adam Right. This guy sounds like he's very odd.

31:41 Dr. Bruce Very odd and a little creepy.

31:43 Adam Right.

31:45 Dr. Bruce And I'm surprised that he's not an alcoholic. I really am.

31:49 Adam Yeah, he's got some sort of underlying problem that will only manifest itself fully after they get married, which hopefully won't happen.

31:57 Dr. Bruce They're engaged right now. They're engaged. Can you talk to your mom?

32:01 Dr. Bruce I have.

32:02 Dr. Bruce And what did she say?

32:03 Dr. Bruce He's just joking around. He doesn't mean anything sexual by it. And I've tried to talk to him and he's just like, well, what do you expect? You're hot. I'm like...

32:11 Adam Okay. How old is this guy?

32:12 Dr. Bruce Like 52.

32:13 Dr. Bruce You tried to talk to him?

32:15 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

32:15 Dr. Bruce You confronted him?

32:16 Dr. Bruce Yeah. And then like my cousin, Lily, who's 27, tried to talk to him. And once my friends tried to talk to him, my boyfriend tried to talk to him.

32:25 Dr. Bruce Well, hold on. How many people are talking to this guy?

32:30 Dr. Bruce My grandparents have. They're like, you really need to stop making...

32:34 Dr. Bruce Wait a minute. Your friends talked to him?

32:37 Dr. Bruce Yeah. Well, a lot of my friends, my cousin used to live with us. A lot of my friends...

32:41 Dr. Bruce So a lot of them said, hey, slow down a little. You're being inappropriate.

32:45 Dr. Bruce They're like, you're making Ashley feel uncomfortable.

32:47 Dr. Bruce Okay. Has he done anything since then?

32:52 Dr. Bruce Since when? Since he's been made...

32:54 Adam Since he's been talking by half the community.

32:56 Dr. Bruce That's what I love about our listeners.

32:58 Dr. Bruce By half of my friends and family and hasn't stopped.

33:00 Dr. Bruce Okay. Hasn't stopped.

33:02 Dr. Bruce Yeah. And I try to go up to my dad's every weekend.

33:05 Dr. Bruce How about talking your dad about it?

33:07 Dr. Bruce Oh, I have. My dad's talked to him. He was the first one I told.

33:11 Dr. Bruce Does your dad and your mom have any kind of relationship still?

33:14 Dr. Bruce Yeah, they talk about me.

33:15 Dr. Bruce Okay.

33:15 Dr. Bruce Like my great friends.

33:18 Dr. Bruce Tell your dad to talk to your mom about this.

33:21 Dr. Bruce He's, everybody's talked to my mom, like my family, my psychiatrist, everybody.

33:28 Adam Okay. And what does your psychiatrist say?

33:30 Dr. Bruce She says that I need to move in with my dad, which I've tried and my mom has legal custody of me and the cops came and got me.

33:38 Dr. Bruce Okay. I think you need to talk to your dad again. And your dad needs to know how important this is to you. Okay.

33:52 Adam But this is Loveline and there's a limit to Adam Corolla's wisdom. And I think that we've reached that.

33:59 Dr. Bruce Listen, you got 75 years of school and I'm still smarter than you are. There's nobody, her mother's in bad shape by virtue of the fact that she picked this guy in the first place so we know she's got a problem. There's nobody else nearby who seems to be able to make a dent in this guy, but the biological dad who has a decent relationship with Tiffany and a decent relationship with his ex-wife should be able to intervene and he has the most at stake here anyway because it's his child and if I was in that position where I thought my young daughter was living under the same roof with a guy who could potentially stumble into a room on any evening and do God knows what to her, I wouldn't rest until I had full custody or until something was done to rectify the situation. If your dad says, Yeah, I called her, but what can you do? He's not doing his job. He is dropping the ball. Put yourself in that position, Bruce.

35:00 Adam Absolutely. But the horror is that it's relying upon adults take action when there's a concern early on.

35:07 Dr. Bruce And sometimes the cops aren't going to do anything.

35:10 Adam No, not if the CPS wouldn't remove the...

35:12 Dr. Bruce I don't think social workers are going to do anything. The church is not going to do anything. I mean, to me, her only recourse is, you know, chaining herself to her dad's sink and telling him that I'm not leaving. I don't feel safe to go home.

35:27 Adam Right. But the child's... her psychiatrist could indicate to the adults, this is really serious. You have to do something. You can't make them. But...

35:35 Dr. Bruce OK, but let me paint another little scenario here.

35:40 Adam You're going further with this. I'm in trouble.

35:41 Dr. Bruce Tiffany is going to a psychiatrist. Psychiatrist, not a psychologist. Um, could Tiffany be exaggerating this just a little bit, creating just a little bit more drama here than actually exists? I mean, this guy's been around for two years. He hasn't done anything. He's made a few comments. But who knows what those comments really were?

36:05 Adam Right.

36:06 Dr. Bruce You know, hey, you're looking good does not always mean I'm going to rape you later. Sometimes it means, hey, you're looking good.

36:12 Adam Right. You know, enlisting the help of an army of people about this problem and drawing up sides. Sometimes that's behavior.

36:21 Dr. Bruce Well, and she's enlisted the help of everyone and still the situation remains the same. So if all those people saw the danger like Tiffany sees the danger, don't you think something would have happened? So maybe she's dramatizing just a little bit.

36:38 Adam Right. We were more with the girl last night who had had sex with the boyfriend and afraid to tell anybody. Then you're...

36:45 Dr. Bruce That's right. All right. So Tiffany, if you're that frightened about it, you have to deal with your dad. But I suspect the situation may not be quite as grave as you've described it.

36:56 Adam Right. Have the psychiatrists have a meeting with all the adults and...

37:00 Dr. Bruce Right. Okay. Bruce, I know it's still early in the show, but I'm going to give you the mic speech just one more time. I know I usually do it each evening about 11, but I'm going to jump in a little early tonight, the fifth night in a row. This here, that's the microphone. All right. Okay. You know the part I may have been screwing up here with the microphone discussion? I keep pointing out the microphone, but I rarely point out your mouth. Your mouth needs to go into the microphone, and that's my fault. I did drop the ball on that. I kept pointing at the microphone, but I never said put your mouth with your mouth. So it was confusing.

37:38 Adam But you know you're the type person that you learn from your mistakes, so I appreciate that.

37:43 Dr. Bruce Right. I do take responsibility for that. I never did tell you to put your mouth into the microphone. I just kept pointing at the microphone.

37:49 Adam Have I given you my suggestions for what to do with your mouth?

37:51 Dr. Bruce No.

37:52 Dr. Bruce No.

37:53 Dr. Bruce All right. When we come back, who are we going to talk to?

37:56 Adam We're going to talk to... Here's somebody. Ruby is going to educate you on the realities of the menstrual cycle.

38:03 Dr. Bruce Fantabulous. After this. Loveline, only on WABN. It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Bruce. Dr. Bruce is a board certified physician. Addiction medicine is a part of his game, as well as emergency medicine. Just as qualified is Dr. Drew. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. And it's back on the phones. We go Ruby.

38:57 Dr. Bruce Hello.

38:58 Dr. Bruce Near 24.

38:59 Dr. Bruce Yes.

38:59 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

39:00 Dr. Bruce First, Adam, I wanted to tell you how impressed I am with your knowledge of the female reproductive system.

39:04 Dr. Bruce Yes.

39:04 Dr. Bruce That is so awesome.

39:05 Adam Even places he can't reach.

39:07 Dr. Bruce Two weeks? Geez, most people don't even know, you know, ovulation at two weeks. That was...

39:12 Dr. Bruce Well, all right, to be...

39:14 Dr. Bruce Your girlfriend must really fill you in.

39:17 Dr. Bruce No, I have this job where I sit around and talk about vaginas all night and that's part of it.

39:25 Dr. Bruce Well, anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you were totally right up until the very end. What happens is throughout the entire menstrual cycle, the 28 days, the uterus is... The lining of the uterus is kind of stocking up with, you know, nutrient fluid and blood and all that type of material and the egg drops down from the fallopian tubes into the uterus and if it hasn't been fertilized up until that point, it goes along and embeds itself into this tissue. If it hasn't been fertilized, it goes ahead and flushes out at the time of the period, along with everything else, and if it's been fertilized, then it starts using that nutrient to perform a little baby.

40:08 Dr. Bruce Right, but here's the question, and therefore you miss your period because it's being eaten. Here's the question, then, how many days before it moves on if it's not been fertilized?

40:23 Dr. Bruce It doesn't move on. From the time it's released from the fallopian tubes to the time that it drops down into the uterus is your window of opportunity. Obviously, it's going to be a little bit more difficult if it's further up in the tubes as opposed to if it's closer to the uterus, but I think it's about two weeks from the time that the egg is released from the ovaries.

40:45 Dr. Bruce I mean, it's about two weeks that...

40:50 Dr. Bruce Well, see, I don't know what your window of opportunity is. I think that depends on each as far as actual pregnancy. I would assume that would depend on your individual cycle, but I would think it would be more than like a day or two. Am I wrong, Dr. Bruce?

41:03 Dr. Bruce Hold on. Let me yell at Bruce for a second. Hold on a second here, Ruby. Listen, Bruce, I'm no gynecologist. I'm no doctor. I failed biology in high school. I was a ceramics major and I started a long carpet cleaning career right after high school. I am a carpenter. That's what I do. And if we were talking about houses, I would know everything. Now you are a doctor, theoretically. If we were talking about framing, I would tell you that studs are spread out 16 on center. I would tell you header sizes. I would tell you spans for headers. I would tell you what shear wall was and what thickness it needed to be and what the nailing pattern of it needed to be. But we're not talking about that. We're talking about your area of expertise.

41:50 Adam And what is it that you'd like to know?

41:51 Dr. Bruce You should go ahead and shed some light on this and not let this poor Ruby over here, who got thrown out of junior college six months ago, describe this whole process to you.

42:04 Dr. Bruce What makes you think that I graduated from junior college?

42:06 Dr. Bruce Well, I said thrown out.

42:07 Adam Because you're calling the show, probably.

42:09 Dr. Bruce We don't have college grads call the show. We don't let them through. We screen them out.

42:15 Adam Okay.

42:15 Dr. Bruce Okay.

42:16 Dr. Bruce So. What about all those college graduates that are attracted to Drew? You know, he's intelligent.

42:20 Dr. Bruce Yeah. There's a handful of those guys out there, mostly Asian men.

42:24 Dr. Bruce Okay.

42:24 Dr. Bruce All right. Now listen, Ruby. So the thing starts down the fallopian tubing.

42:30 Dr. Bruce That's how like ectopic pregnancies occur. That's where a tube will pregnant.

42:33 Dr. Bruce Right. But how long does it take the egg to make its way down the tube?

42:37 Dr. Bruce I would have guessed about two weeks, depending on your cycle.

42:40 Dr. Bruce But if you say if you're on the two weeks.

42:42 Dr. Bruce Well, yeah, that's since it's a 28 to 30 day cycle. Yeah.

42:46 Dr. Bruce But wait a minute.

42:48 Adam Mid cycle, it pops out of the ovary and headstones.

42:51 Dr. Bruce Two weeks. Just like you said, you were totally right. Pops, estrogen is released, which caused the release of the egg from the ovaries. It takes about two weeks, depending on your personal cycle to travel from the ovaries to the uterus. Therefore, it embeds itself into the line.

43:08 Dr. Bruce Bruce says no.

43:09 Dr. Bruce Okay, tell me what's wrong.

43:11 Adam No, when it comes out of the ovaries and travels down the tubes, that's a relatively short period of time.

43:16 Dr. Bruce Well, how long?

43:20 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

43:21 Adam I would say that you're talking about a couple of days or two.

43:27 Dr. Bruce A couple days. I'm still very confused about the whole thing. Anne, maybe jump in here.

43:33 Dr. Bruce Never date a man who knows more about your vagina than you do.

43:37 Dr. Bruce Don't worry about Bruce. You have your period. You're done with your period, right? Then the ovulation process starts about two weeks later. Now, the ovulation process starts. The egg starts going down the tube two weeks after that. So it's up there and nothing's going on for about two weeks. Let's just say that's your cycle. Nothing. So nothing happens from the time you finish your period till two weeks later when the egg begins its descent down the tube. Then a couple days later, it reaches the what? Bruce?

44:20 Adam It reaches the uterus.

44:21 Dr. Bruce It reaches the uterus. I don't know why it took you ten minutes, but it reaches the uterus. Now it is in the uterus, correct?

44:28 Adam Yeah.

44:29 Dr. Bruce Now you can get pregnant when it's in the uterus, when it reaches the uterus.

44:34 Dr. Bruce In the tube.

44:35 Dr. Bruce In the tube, you can get pregnant.

44:37 Dr. Bruce Yes, exactly.

44:38 Dr. Bruce It can get pregnant in the tube.

44:39 Dr. Bruce Oh, definitely, yes.

44:40 Dr. Bruce And that's that ectopic pregnancy.

44:43 It actually doesn't.

44:44 Dr. Bruce It implants. Exactly. If it stays in the tube and doesn't make it down to the uterus.

44:49 Dr. Bruce Right.

44:49 Dr. Bruce That's.

44:50 Dr. Bruce Right. But I'm not talking about atypical stuff or abnormalities. I'm talking about normal textbook kind of biology stuff.

44:59 Dr. Bruce How long is the passage from in the tube?

45:01 Dr. Bruce Drops down the tube. Bruce, even though he's a doctor, claims to be one, has no idea how long that period is, although he has suggested it's a relatively short period of time. I'm guessing anywhere from an hour.

45:13 Adam It's not a parking lot up there. It's a freeway.

45:15 Dr. Bruce It goes down or it gets to the uterus. Right. And then it's it can be fertilized in a couple of days while it's down there. And if it's not fertilized in that period, what happens?

45:27 Dr. Bruce It sloughs out.

45:28 Dr. Bruce But it doesn't slough out yet. It's still not going to slough out for another couple of weeks.

45:33 Adam Has Drew recommended Prozac for you?

45:35 Dr. Bruce I know.

45:35 Adam OCD here. You're obsessing on this. It's incredible.

45:38 Dr. Bruce If you could give me an answer or two, we wouldn't be getting into this. I mean, Bruce, go get a book. Go get a book and look this thing up, would you? Are you sure you're a doctor?

45:49 Adam What's that name you call me? What's one of the things you call me?

45:51 Dr. Bruce Jack Hole?

45:52 Dr. Bruce No, no, no.

45:55 Adam Look, idiot.

45:56 Dr. Bruce Idiot.

45:56 Adam Let me say this.

45:57 Dr. Bruce Go get the book. Look, idiot.

45:58 Adam I don't care what happens to the egg if it's not fertilized.

46:01 Dr. Bruce It's like, what do you do?

46:03 Adam Do you want to know where tampons go when they're after their use?

46:05 Dr. Bruce What do you do for a living? Go get a book.

46:08 Adam I treat serious medical problems. And I find that very hard to believe.

46:13 Dr. Bruce I find that very hard to believe. I can treat you.

46:16 Adam I can help you. I can.

46:17 Dr. Bruce You can help me by go getting a book and looking up something you should have learned first year in med school. There you go. Look it up. We'll take a break. We'll be back. Hey, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is the sage, Dr. Bruce over there, who seems to know something about something that's just not medicine. All right, we'll take a quick break, and we'll be back with more of the show in just 10 seconds.

47:19 Dr. Bruce This is Loveline on Radio Station.

47:35 Adam The gas is coming. Get me a mask, Ann.

47:38 Dr. Bruce Dr. Bruce is here filling in for Dr. Drew, and now I'm not sure if it's Dr. MD, Dr. or sort of Dr. like, you know, Dr. J or Dr. John or Dr. Hook.

47:50 Adam I'd say, listen, I don't want to drag myself down to your level.

47:54 Dr. Bruce He does like guitars. Are you a blues musician or is a real doctor?

48:00 Adam I'm a doctor. You know, doctors that get out there and try and play music with, you know, with rock musicians. You got to watch those guys.

48:06 Dr. Bruce Sorry, I just, you know.

48:06 Adam Just playing the privacy of my home and trying to disturb too many people.

48:09 Dr. Bruce But like I said, I just thought the whole doctor title may have been some sort of a thing that some, you know, bass player in Louisiana dubbed you with in 1974.

48:18 Adam I wish I played that well.

48:19 Dr. Bruce So you actually went to med school and everything.

48:22 Adam I thought of an after analogy to you wanted me to track the spent egg here. Do you track your spent sperm? Where are they all, Adam? Do you know where they go?

48:33 Dr. Bruce Yes, they go right into the hamper.

48:37 Adam It's pretty scary.

48:37 Dr. Bruce All right. Nice. Nice comeback. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Forget about the fax number. My eyes hurt too much to read. Dr. Bruce is here and we figured a few things out about the women's reproductive system tonight. Just not everything. And no thanks to Dr. Bruce. Juan.

49:01 Dr. Bruce Yeah?

49:01 Dr. Bruce You're 17.

49:02 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

49:03 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

49:04 Dr. Bruce What's up, Adam?

49:05 Dr. Bruce Hey.

49:05 Dr. Bruce You're like my hero, man.

49:07 Dr. Bruce Oh, thanks, Juan.

49:08 Dr. Bruce I'm all into the construction now.

49:10 Dr. Bruce You're getting into construction?

49:11 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I'm going to work on my license. I'm working with my brother-in-law in getting the general construction license.

49:18 Dr. Bruce You know, your brother-in-law do masonry?

49:20 Dr. Bruce He does everything.

49:21 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

49:22 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

49:23 Dr. Bruce Are you a Hispanic guy?

49:24 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I'm Puerto Rican.

49:25 Dr. Bruce Let me tell you something about them Hispanic guys. It's Puerto Rican. That's Hispanic, right?

49:31 Dr. Bruce Just Latino, I guess.

49:33 Dr. Bruce You got a gift for the masonry. They know how to do the brick, the tile, the stucco work, grouting, forming work, all sorts of concrete work. Yes. It's in your blood.

49:46 Dr. Bruce It is. I guess I'm natural to it.

49:48 Dr. Bruce That's right.

49:48 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

49:49 Dr. Bruce Not a bad way to make an honest living. So what's your question?

49:52 Dr. Bruce Oh, I have a question for Dr. Bruce.

49:55 Adam Yes.

49:56 Dr. Bruce I was wondering if having sex in the beach water would affect me and my partner.

50:02 Adam No, if it's Santa Monica Bay, you probably get some toxic.

50:05 Dr. Bruce You get hepatitis.

50:06 Adam Yeah. Well, no, seriously, there are no effects from having sex in water in terms of.

50:16 Dr. Bruce Would the salt have anything on it?

50:19 Dr. Bruce Uh, no.

50:22 Adam Have anything on it?

50:23 Dr. Bruce Well, would the salt water make.

50:26 Dr. Bruce Yeah, have any side effects create anything bad?

50:29 Dr. Bruce Well, what about this, Bruce? A woman gets lubricated to a certain degree when she's in that way. Doesn't the water sort of dissipate that? You know, make things a little uncomfortable?

50:44 Adam Certainly that could happen. But in terms of, you know, you have a potential space vaginally and you have the sex act occurring and you're not bringing the whole ocean in there, which is, I think what you're talking about, is the water going to mix in with what's going on?

50:57 Dr. Bruce Yeah, you know, in the intercourse or anything.

50:59 Adam No, no, but I mean, again, a lot of the waters that people bathe in have a lot of bacteria in them. Because people, hopefully, they don't defecate, but kids, small children do at times.

51:11 Dr. Bruce Small children. My friends do every time they go to the ocean. Where do you live?

51:15 Dr. Bruce Anaheim.

51:16 Dr. Bruce The Anaheim.

51:17 Adam Be very careful.

51:18 Dr. Bruce Listen, you want to do it in a body of water, just, you know, turn the hose on yourself or something, but just stay out of the ocean with that one.

51:25 Dr. Bruce And one last thing. I love you.

51:28 Dr. Bruce That's right.

51:29 Dr. Bruce And I love you too, Adam.

51:30 Dr. Bruce I love you too, Juan. Thank you. All right. Learn your craft there.

51:34 Dr. Bruce We have the doctor on the line.

51:36 Dr. Bruce Oh, we do.

51:37 Dr. Bruce But he doesn't want to go on the air.

51:39 Dr. Bruce Oh, he doesn't.

51:40 Dr. Bruce So, Bruce, do you want to come out and talk to him, get the answer?

51:43 Dr. Bruce Now, who is this doctor, Bruce?

51:44 Adam Dr. Phelps. Dr. Phelps, he's a...

51:48 Dr. Bruce You don't have to say the guy's name. How do you... You know, you and Drew, you suffer from the same disease. And I...

51:57 Adam Wait, answering the question you asked us?

52:00 Dr. Bruce No, but the guy doesn't want to go on the air.

52:02 Adam He doesn't want to talk on the air because he doesn't want to be wrong on the air, knowing this guy. He gives me such a hard time.

52:08 Dr. Bruce This guy... I'm saying he probably doesn't want his name mentioned. I mean, who is the doctor? I don't need the guy's name. I just mean...

52:13 Adam He's an obstetrics and gynecology senior resident. Okay.

52:17 Dr. Bruce At the hospital you work at?

52:18 Adam Yeah, at the hospital. He's a little abusive towards me for being a resident. As I called him down to the ER for a patient was transferred, that said they were pregnant and the patient turned out not to be pregnant. So he's always kidded me about not being able to diagnose basic pregnancy.

52:32 Dr. Bruce We've talked him into going on the air. So is he online? What?

52:38 Adam He's deep breathing or something.

52:40 Dr. Bruce Yeah. He said, give him 10 seconds.

52:41 Dr. Bruce Give him 10 seconds.

52:44 Adam He's delivering a baby, doing something important.

52:46 Dr. Bruce You know, it's funny that it's bizarre to me that people would get nervous about coming on the show. And I understand they would. But, you know, I sit next to Drew every night who I have to like poke with a stick to wake up. He falls asleep halfway into his answers.

53:01 Dr. Bruce Line seven.

53:01 Dr. Bruce Line seven. Hello, doctor.

53:04 Dr. Bruce What do you want, doctor?

53:05 Adam No, he's not. He ain't a doctor, believe me.

53:09 Dr. Bruce No, he's talking to you. What is your name, doctor?

53:13 Dr. Bruce Dr. Fulford.

53:14 Dr. Bruce How's that spelled? F-U-L-L?

53:17 Adam Yeah, I'm not sure. I'd want to go.

53:18 Dr. Bruce 1L.

53:19 Dr. Bruce Oh, okay.

53:20 Dr. Bruce Is this Dr. Heischover?

53:22 Dr. Bruce That is him. That's better known as Dr. Bruce.

53:26 Adam Yeah, better known as Dr. Bruce.

53:27 Dr. Bruce Dr. Bruce.

53:28 Dr. Bruce So do you two work together?

53:30 Adam I supervise this guy.

53:33 Dr. Bruce And frequently.

53:34 Adam Yeah, right.

53:35 Dr. Bruce Is he really a doctor?

53:37 Dr. Bruce Well, sometimes. A Fulford.

53:40 Adam Behave yourself.

53:42 Dr. Bruce I just can't believe he's an actual doctor. He's never had an answer to any question I've ever given him that had to do with medicine.

53:48 Dr. Bruce Well, it's a little stage fright, that's all.

53:50 Dr. Bruce Okay, that's all. You think he'd be over it by now. So you know how this works on a woman, these parts.

54:00 Adam Adam, why don't you explain the way a woman's parts work?

54:03 Dr. Bruce Well, I'll ask the questions because we have some specific ones here. How long, and doctor, this is all just average lengths, because I know some things will vary from woman to woman, but you just give me the average amount of time or space or distance, whatever the question is, okay? As far as the egg making its way down the fallopian tube, when the egg begins its drop, how long does that usually take before it gets to the uterus?

54:36 Dr. Bruce About a week.

54:37 Dr. Bruce About a week. Well, that's a new one. Bruce thought it took 15 to 20 minutes and thought it was a couple of days, but you're saying in the average woman...

54:50 Dr. Bruce Well, it's probably more like five days, but you're just wanting a ballpark average, so...

54:55 Adam Well, Adam was... Here's his analogy, a parking lot for Adam, and I was saying it's more like, you know...

55:01 Dr. Bruce You called it a freeway. Five days to travel six inches is not a freeway.

55:08 Dr. Bruce This is the big question that you know you're wondering, is right after ovulation, fertilization of the egg has to take place approximately no more than two days after that. Otherwise, you've missed it. It takes about... It's about a week before that fertilized egg, if it were to get fertilized, to implant into the uterus. So, it's probably in the uterus and it floats around there for a couple of days before it actually implants, if it's been a fertilized egg. Otherwise, it's just lost with the next menstrual cycle.

55:41 Dr. Bruce Otherwise, it just floats around until it's sloughed off with the next menstrual cycle, is what you're saying.

55:48 Dr. Bruce Correct.

55:49 Dr. Bruce Okay, so let me just get this timeline down. After the woman has ended her period, the average ovulation begins two weeks after that?

56:02 Dr. Bruce No, you start from the first day of bleeding.

56:04 Adam You're going to confuse.

56:05 Dr. Bruce All right, just quiet down. Go ahead, Brerard.

56:07 Dr. Bruce Start from the first day of bleeding and count approximately 14 days on average.

56:12 Dr. Bruce From the first day?

56:13 Dr. Bruce From the first day of bleeding, count 14 days, and that's the approximate average day of ovulation.

56:23 Dr. Bruce Okay.

56:23 Dr. Bruce That varies from day 12 to as late as day 16 or 19.

56:28 Dr. Bruce But the average is 14. Correct. We'll just stay with the averages. And then the ovulation begins, and that means approximately five days until it gets down to the uterus.

56:44 Dr. Bruce More or less.

56:45 Dr. Bruce Okay. Approximately. But again, I'm not going to hold you to any of this. I'm just saying, we'll pick, you know, if some women are two days and some women are four days, we'll just go with three days. So five days. So it's approximately 19 days from the time the woman begins her period to the time that egg is in the uterus. But she can also get pregnant in a two-bulb pregnancy as well, right?

57:12 Dr. Bruce Right.

57:13 Dr. Bruce So she could be pregnant at any time or you could theoretically impregnate her at any time during the ovulation while the egg was traveling in its five-day period.

57:23 Dr. Bruce Most eggs are fertilized in the fallopian tube itself.

57:30 Dr. Bruce Oh.

57:30 Dr. Bruce And they start cell dividing and so forth while in the fallopian tube and as it's traveling down.

57:39 Dr. Bruce Aha.

57:39 Adam Anne told you that earlier.

57:41 Dr. Bruce Around somewhere between days three to seven. It's usually about a week after fertilization has occurred that implantation occurs and starts to implant.

57:55 Dr. Bruce Right.

57:56 Dr. Bruce And start growing, making its little strongholds into the endometrial lining.

58:02 Dr. Bruce So then that is why when I was talking to producer Anne and she was attempting to get pregnant, I could have done it one night after work, but she wanted to do it with her husband. And, you know, that's her business to eat your own. That's why she was saying two days after the ovulation began because it gets impregnated while it's in the tube. And Anne mentioned that, but we were talking about an ectopic pregnancy where it actually sticks in the tube after it's been fertilized.

58:31 Dr. Bruce Correct.

58:32 Dr. Bruce All right.

58:33 Adam All right.

58:33 Dr. Bruce We've had a lot of answers. I really appreciate this, Dr. Fulford, by the way.

58:38 Adam See if Fulford knows about the breast pill.

58:41 Dr. Bruce Do you know about what breast pill?

58:43 Adam That makes breasts enlarge.

58:45 Dr. Bruce Do you know any pills that make breasts larger other than the pill?

58:50 Adam There was something that came out about a claim that there's a pill, and I don't know if it was a direct effect or a side effect, that increased breast size.

58:58 Dr. Bruce Have you heard about that, doctor?

59:00 Adam FDA-approved pill, but...

59:02 Dr. Bruce Not FDA-approved? Is that what you're saying, Dr. Bruce?

59:04 Adam Yeah, just some side effect type of thing, as I recall.

59:08 Dr. Bruce Well, estrogens can make the breast feel a little bit fuller, but also some people in alternative medicine report that progesterone creams rubbed onto the breast tissue can stimulate the growth of them a little bit, but I do believe that that is if there are receptors available for progesterone in that particular breast tissue, would that occur?

59:41 Dr. Bruce There's nothing like good old-fashioned plastic surgery, though, to really bring the breast to life, right, Dr?

59:47 Dr. Bruce That's right.

59:47 Dr. Bruce All right. Well, you've answered all our questions. Thank goodness. Be honest with me, Dr. Fulver. Is Bruce, is he a doctor, or does he just work with the vending machines there as far as restocking, maintenance, and that sort of thing?

1:00:06 Dr. Bruce He's an actual doctor.

1:00:07 Dr. Bruce I cannot fathom that. I really can't. All right, doctor. Thank you very much.

1:00:11 Adam Thanks.

1:00:12 Dr. Bruce Dr. Bruce, we'll see you in the ER.

1:00:14 Adam See you in the ER, Fulver.

1:00:15 Dr. Bruce Let me say something. I want to apologize to Dr. Bruce. I want to take something back. Even if you know nothing about medicine yourself, you do at least know others who apparently know something about medicine. Then for that, I want to apologize. I really do.

1:00:31 Adam I'm not accepting that. I'd love to the public to have seen you furiously taking notes as the physician is describing the events of the cycle.

1:00:39 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

1:00:40 Adam It's rather frightening evidence of your obsessive compulsive disorder.

1:00:43 Dr. Bruce I wanted to get an answer to this and I'm sure our listeners were curious as well. Candice.

1:00:50 Dr. Bruce Hello.

1:00:51 Dr. Bruce Okay. So you heard about the brass bell. Yes. Yeah.

1:00:55 Dr. Bruce And I called and they sent me information.

1:00:57 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

1:00:58 Dr. Bruce And I just wanted to know if it worked or not.

1:01:00 Dr. Bruce I, there's no free rides.

1:01:04 Dr. Bruce Okay.

1:01:05 Dr. Bruce And all those things that, and I know, I know it just sounds cliche, that sound too good to be true or not true.

1:01:11 Dr. Bruce Pardon?

1:01:12 Dr. Bruce I have seen tests done on this because I watch, I watch these, you know, shows, these 2020s and shows like this, and nothing really works.

1:01:24 Adam It's a porn channel 2020.

1:01:25 Dr. Bruce Yeah. You can get, I mean, if you, if you take some estrogen or something, can't your breast grow a little bit? Or you take like the birth control pill.

1:01:34 Dr. Bruce I'm on the pill.

1:01:35 Dr. Bruce You're on the pill.

1:01:36 Adam There's cyclic change in size and, and well now where did you send away for this stuff without mentioning a specific company? Is this out of state or out of country? Yeah.

1:01:43 Dr. Bruce It's somewhere from Texas.

1:01:44 Adam And what's in it?

1:01:46 Dr. Bruce No, everything's bigger in Texas.

1:01:47 Dr. Bruce What?

1:01:48 Dr. Bruce Everything's bigger in Texas. I tell ya.

1:01:50 Dr. Bruce Do you want to hear the ingredients that it says it's in?

1:01:52 Adam Oh yeah, that's interesting.

1:01:53 Dr. Bruce Okay. It says wild black oats, protein, two sorts of hops, maize, rye, herbs, wheat, fiber, barley, starch and malt.

1:02:04 Dr. Bruce That's course food from the Texas. That sounds like beer to me. No, that's not gonna do anything.

1:02:09 Dr. Bruce It says that it has natural estrogen, I don't know.

1:02:14 Adam It's gonna screw up your cycle. It's gonna probably interfere with your birth control pills if there's enough estrogen in there to really make a difference.

1:02:21 Dr. Bruce Don't bother.

1:02:22 Adam Don't take, I wouldn't take them. Right. I wouldn't take them. She shouldn't take them.

1:02:25 Dr. Bruce Don't take them. Feed them to the dog. Okay. Bruce, where are we going here?

1:02:29 Adam We're going to... Two.

1:02:32 Dr. Bruce Two. All right, Bruce.

1:02:33 Dr. Bruce Dave, how's it going?

1:02:35 Dr. Bruce You're 25. What's going on?

1:02:37 Dr. Bruce Hey, my question is, my buddy and I, his dad was using the erection pill and basically we got some and we've been, you know, just trying a couple here and there with our female friends and it damn well works. But my question is, is if we keep on using it or if I use it, am I going to lose my own erection in the future when I stop it?

1:03:01 Dr. Bruce Are you taking... Is it Viagra?

1:03:03 Dr. Bruce Yeah, yeah, yeah. The erection one, yeah.

1:03:06 Dr. Bruce Just say yes when I say Viagra, would you, jackass? What, now, what's it do? What's it do to you? What's the sensation?

1:03:17 Dr. Bruce About an hour after I take it, when I'm kind of in the mood, it gives a bigger erection and it lasts longer. And even after you come, yeah, it still can stay erect and erect. And then anytime you get erect or aroused in the next almost 24 hour period, you're back at the heart of your life.

1:03:43 Dr. Bruce And does it, is it an aphrodisiac as well? I mean, does it make you more amorous?

1:03:50 Adam No.

1:03:51 Dr. Bruce No, it doesn't.

1:03:52 Adam It has a placebo effect. Whatever you think is going to happen is very powerful.

1:03:56 Dr. Bruce Plus, when you have a penis that could be used as a lug wrench, it's so erect, I guess it tends to make you want to do more with it.

1:04:06 Dr. Bruce You want to show off.

1:04:07 Dr. Bruce That's right.

1:04:09 Adam I mean, at your age, why are you taking this stuff? I mean, it's pretty ridiculous.

1:04:12 Dr. Bruce I mean, you smoke dope, I guess, just for a try it.

1:04:14 Dr. Bruce Yeah, but you don't need it. You aren't having any erectile difficulties.

1:04:18 Adam No, no, no, no. So you're not using it on a regular basis or anything like that?

1:04:21 Dr. Bruce I think about 10 times.

1:04:23 Dr. Bruce Yeah. Here's the deal, Dave. I'm no doctor, but neither is Dr. Bruce. I'll just speak for both of us. It's hard to fool mother nature, and there are consequences to things. And you don't know what the long-term effects of this is for healthy young folks like yourself. Maybe nothing, but maybe something. And the point is, is you don't need it. So don't monkey.

1:04:50 Dr. Bruce Don't monkey with it.

1:04:51 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I wouldn't. I mean, unless you want to take one couple of times a year or something, fine. But when you start, you know, using it on a weekly basis or a daily basis, it just seems like there's an opportunity to screw things up. I just know one thing I've learned is that you try to fool your body and your body comes back around. Yeah. There's compensation, I mean, when you look at nature and it's like there's some pest and this pest is eating this crop, so they try to eradicate it through poison. And then the ones that survive end up being immune to the poison, you know. Things have a way. And then before you know it, you have a whole bunch of these pests and now the poison isn't working on them. And the same thing with these viruses, with the antibiotics, you know, and now they get these superviruses or, you know, it has a way of overcoming things.

1:05:47 Adam Really like struggling for words there?

1:05:50 Dr. Bruce No, I'm waiting for you as a doctor, a theoretical doctor, co-host, who I trust to bolster my point here. But the point is, is it, your body has a way of compensating for things. And you don't want a monkey with that, not a 25.

1:06:06 Adam Tremendous number of younger people just experimenting with this. They were using this substance to treat heart disease experimentally. And so it has been around for a long time. There's been a lot of use of that substance without any long-term side effects.

1:06:24 Dr. Bruce So there's been a lot of use of Viagra as a heart medication.

1:06:28 Adam No, no, it's not the same medication. But in other words, that family of medications, there was research going on with that. And so it's not something that's completely new in terms of its chemical structure. Well, you're right. I agree with you 100%. People shouldn't mess with a process that's already working.

1:06:47 Dr. Bruce It's like diet pills or something. It's going to come back to haunt you, I think. Okay. Where are we going?

1:06:54 Adam Well, you just covered up my numbers.

1:06:56 Dr. Bruce Okay. So you're switching pages on me. Nick? You're 24. Uh-oh. You got that little girl voice.

1:07:07 Dr. Bruce Oh, no. Here you go.

1:07:09 Dr. Bruce Uh-oh. Yeah.

1:07:11 Adam You're going to have to answer the questions now.

1:07:13 Dr. Bruce Now I got to ask the pertinent questions. What's that? Any trauma when you were younger? Say eight, nine years old?

1:07:22 Dr. Bruce Nope.

1:07:23 Dr. Bruce Nobody died?

1:07:24 Dr. Bruce You think I sound like a nine-year-old?

1:07:26 Dr. Bruce No, no, no. No, 10, 11. What? Nobody died?

1:07:30 Dr. Bruce Nobody died.

1:07:31 Dr. Bruce Where's your dad?

1:07:33 Dr. Bruce He's at home.

1:07:34 Dr. Bruce He's at home? And when did you lose your virginity?

1:07:38 Dr. Bruce When I was 14.

1:07:40 Dr. Bruce 14? How old was a guy, 22?

1:07:43 Dr. Bruce No, he was 16.

1:07:45 Dr. Bruce 16. And anything before that?

1:07:51 Dr. Bruce No.

1:07:51 Dr. Bruce Huh?

1:07:52 Dr. Bruce Nope.

1:07:52 Dr. Bruce Serious now?

1:07:54 Dr. Bruce Serious.

1:07:55 Dr. Bruce Ever go to camp?

1:07:56 Dr. Bruce No.

1:07:57 Dr. Bruce No neighbor friends?

1:08:00 Dr. Bruce The neighbor was the guy who took my virginity. He was my neighbor.

1:08:04 Adam How about alien abductions? Were you ever abducted by aliens?

1:08:07 Dr. Bruce No.

1:08:08 Dr. Bruce No.

1:08:08 Adam Covered the gamut.

1:08:10 Dr. Bruce Nobody in the fam, dad do a little bit of drinking?

1:08:13 Dr. Bruce Nope.

1:08:13 Dr. Bruce I bet my mom is an alcoholic.

1:08:15 Dr. Bruce Mom's an alcoholic? And ever have a eating disorder?

1:08:21 Dr. Bruce No.

1:08:21 Dr. Bruce Huh?

1:08:22 Dr. Bruce Nope.

1:08:23 Dr. Bruce All right. And you do any drinking yourself?

1:08:25 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

1:08:26 Dr. Bruce No, but you wouldn't?

1:08:28 Dr. Bruce Not a whole lot.

1:08:29 Dr. Bruce Wouldn't consider yourself an alcoholic?

1:08:32 Dr. Bruce Well, I guess because I drink and it's in my family. I probably have some kind of...

1:08:39 Dr. Bruce Is mom sober now?

1:08:41 Dr. Bruce No.

1:08:42 Dr. Bruce No. That's gotta be... I mean, we're used to talking to dads that are F-Ups or kids that have dads that are F-Ups. And that's always tough, but I'm almost used to it.

1:08:52 Dr. Bruce He's in jail right now, my mom is.

1:08:54 Dr. Bruce Oh, I see, I see. The voice... what's she doing in jail?

1:09:01 Dr. Bruce She got some daylights.

1:09:06 Dr. Bruce She's had... Yeah, she must have had quite a few to put herself in jail.

1:09:12 Adam Now, Adam was asking if family was normal, everything was okay. You said yes.

1:09:16 Dr. Bruce No, she said, is your dad at home? He asked me if my mom...

1:09:19 Dr. Bruce Oh, I see. I usually start with the dad when I get the young girl voice.

1:09:23 Dr. Bruce But everything's normal as far as my life. I mean, I've accepted the fact that my mom is an alcoholic.

1:09:30 Dr. Bruce But it...

1:09:30 Dr. Bruce Normal for me.

1:09:32 Dr. Bruce I know, but is a child having a serious alcoholic for mother just gotta be tragic?

1:09:38 Dr. Bruce It's exceeded since I'm older.

1:09:40 Dr. Bruce It's picked up a little bit? Well, you also may be more aware of it now because...

1:09:45 Dr. Bruce Yeah, because I am older.

1:09:47 Dr. Bruce Yeah, because you understand things a little better. And what's up with dad that he would just let mom spin off this way?

1:09:56 Dr. Bruce Just one of those people that, I mean, I don't know.

1:09:59 Adam Okay, mom was actively drinking while you were growing up?

1:10:02 Dr. Bruce No, not when I was growing up. They always had jobs or whatever. But it seemed like... Let me see how far I go back. Can I go... Maybe when I was... I'd say 14, that it started.

1:10:18 Dr. Bruce She just became an alcoholic when you were 14?

1:10:21 Dr. Bruce I think that's when I kind of noticed that she was drinking more.

1:10:24 Dr. Bruce All right. Well, I'm guessing she'd been drinking a little before that, but...

1:10:28 Dr. Bruce Yeah, it's probably, most likely.

1:10:30 Dr. Bruce How long is she in jail for?

1:10:31 Dr. Bruce Three months.

1:10:32 Dr. Bruce Three months? Geez, you can... Oh, Jay didn't do three months.

1:10:37 Dr. Bruce She's on work release, though.

1:10:39 Dr. Bruce Oh, she's on work release? Oh, it's got to make you proud every time you pass her on the freeway. Do you honk? Do you honk the horn?

1:10:46 Dr. Bruce But I love her.

1:10:47 Dr. Bruce Hey, ma, you missed a rapper.

1:10:52 Adam Okay, so how's your relationship with your husband pretty good?

1:10:55 Dr. Bruce I don't have a husband. I have a boyfriend.

1:10:57 Dr. Bruce Oh, uh-huh. And is he the father of your child or...?

1:11:00 Dr. Bruce I have no children.

1:11:01 Dr. Bruce You have no children? Okay.

1:11:04 Dr. Bruce My question...

1:11:05 Dr. Bruce Yeah. Did you do any stripping? What do you do for a living?

1:11:10 Dr. Bruce Me? I'm at work right now.

1:11:12 Dr. Bruce At the strip club?

1:11:13 Dr. Bruce No. I work at, um, um, Rocky Mountain Bottle.

1:11:19 Dr. Bruce Rocky Mountain Bottle? Oh, sure. Yeah, the bottle place.

1:11:23 Dr. Bruce Coors.

1:11:24 Dr. Bruce Oh, Coors. Oh, you...

1:11:26 Dr. Bruce It shouldn't even be famous on the radio.

1:11:28 Dr. Bruce You work at Coors? What do you do there?

1:11:30 Dr. Bruce Well, I'm a store clerk.

1:11:32 Dr. Bruce Oh, all right.

1:11:32 Adam He's going to want free beer next.

1:11:34 Dr. Bruce That's great. You got... Oh, your mom must be dying to get in there.

1:11:40 Adam Okay. Is your mom working a 12-step program and all that kind of stuff?

1:11:45 Dr. Bruce She's done all the...

1:11:46 Adam And you've gone to Alateen and Al-Anon?

1:11:48 Dr. Bruce All that stuff. Yeah.

1:11:51 Dr. Bruce All right. So what's your question?

1:11:53 Dr. Bruce Okay. My question is, I have a boyfriend. And when he was two years old, he had a bladder infection. And his mom didn't know. And they liked it. It was got too far. And they had to perform surgery on him to clean it out. I'm not sure what they do.

1:12:11 Dr. Bruce All right. So now...

1:12:13 Dr. Bruce So now, when he got of age, that he knew he could have sex or orgasm or whatever.

1:12:21 Dr. Bruce That's one more time. So now...

1:12:23 Dr. Bruce So now, like now, as of when he was 16, he's not 16 now, he's 36 now.

1:12:30 Dr. Bruce Right.

1:12:31 Dr. Bruce He has no... He has an orgasm, but nothing comes out. Oh.

1:12:37 Dr. Bruce Nothing comes out?

1:12:38 Dr. Bruce No.

1:12:38 Adam Just air?

1:12:39 Dr. Bruce Retrograde ejaculation.

1:12:42 Dr. Bruce It goes into his bladder or...

1:12:44 Dr. Bruce Right. Right. Okay.

1:12:46 Dr. Bruce Right?

1:12:46 Dr. Bruce Right.

1:12:47 Dr. Bruce Okay. So if we were to ever try to have children... Right... .together, how would that work?

1:12:55 Dr. Bruce He'd have to pee on you.

1:12:58 Dr. Bruce No.

1:12:59 Dr. Bruce How would that work, Bruce? How could he do it? Oh, I don't know why I'm asking you. Should we call one of your buddies?

1:13:06 Adam Yeah. Let's call a urologist this time. I'm not sure what surgery he had, but if he wanted to have kids, as long as he's producing sperm, as long as he's fertile, which he probably still is. Right.

1:13:19 Dr. Bruce They could extract that from him?

1:13:21 Adam Yeah. And depending on exactly what the damage was or what's going on.

1:13:24 Dr. Bruce I mean, okay, they will extract the sperm and put it into her. Is that? Yeah. Is that true?

1:13:30 Adam That's a possibility. I don't know that that's what they do with him. I'm not sure exactly.

1:13:33 Dr. Bruce Well, if nothing's coming out of his penis, they would have to extract it somehow.

1:13:39 Adam Right. You can. I mean, if you have retrograde ejaculation for years and years and years, you can run into problems secondary to that. So I'm not sure why they would just leave that whole situation alone.

1:13:51 Dr. Bruce Okay, so he should go in and see a urologist and consult him. But I'm sure there's ways around this. Okay.

1:13:57 Adam Yes.

1:13:57 Dr. Bruce We're going to take a break. Thanks for the insurance. Okay. We'll be back.

1:14:32 It is Love Line.

1:14:34 Dr. Bruce I'm Adam Parola. That is Dr. Bruce. Dr. Bruce filming for Dr. Drew, and he turns back into a pumpkin at Midnight Tonight because Dr. Drew will be in next week. But there'll be other days for Dr. Bruce, not here, but there'll be a-

1:14:51 Adam Call me after this series of shows and give me some advice. Like, don't come back.

1:14:56 Dr. Bruce Oh, you're wonderful, come on. Come on, Bruce. You know what I like about Bruce? He may not know anything about medicine, but he is a great guy and he actually has hobbies. He likes to talk about cars and guitars and airplanes, mechanical stuff. Drew is a chick. Drew does not have hobbies.

1:15:17 Adam We both shoot rats, you know.

1:15:19 Dr. Bruce You're another one of your hobbies. Drew does not know from anything, cars, music. He doesn't care about anything. All he does is work.

1:15:30 Adam My breasts hurt.

1:15:31 Dr. Bruce And complain about his breasts. That's all Drew does. Yeah, let's hear, you know.

1:15:36 Adam Have you heard him sing before?

1:15:37 Dr. Bruce I've not heard Drew sing opera.

1:15:39 Adam I like to hear that.

1:15:40 Dr. Bruce Have you?

1:15:41 Adam No.

1:15:42 Dr. Bruce I know he has trained at it or had trained at it for years. I mean, you know, least 10 years. And I know he's good because he admits he's decent and he has such a low self-esteem. It's true that, you know, there's a difference between me and Drew. If I'm if I said I was great at something, it mean I was mediocre at it. And if Drew said he's mediocre at it, he would be great at it. Do you see what I'm saying?

1:16:12 Adam Maybe he just shares that with more serious friends and he doesn't think to be responsible for information. And he's right.

1:16:19 Dr. Bruce I'm not that interested, really.

1:16:21 Adam So you're just going to make fun of him. So he's used good judgment and not discussing with you.

1:16:27 Dr. Bruce I know he's pretty decent at it. So that maybe that is a hobby of his. I don't know. But I don't trust guys that don't like to wrench and tinker. And Drew doesn't like to do either one of those.

1:16:37 Adam That's another strong, positive point.

1:16:39 Dr. Bruce Still not a hobby. Bill?

1:16:41 Dr. Bruce Hey, what's up?

1:16:42 Dr. Bruce You're 25.

1:16:43 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

1:16:43 Dr. Bruce What's going on?

1:16:45 Dr. Bruce OK, Adam, before, I know I've been rather foolish here, but I've taken GHB rather heavily for about six months. And I just tried to quit the other night and noticed I was getting extremely anxious and some pretty, pretty severe muscle cramps, too.

1:17:04 Dr. Bruce Oh, right. Trying to quit. We've not talked to many people that were hooked on GHB.

1:17:10 Adam Yeah. Gamma hydroxybutyrate. And there are forms of it that are still available on the Internet. What they do is they have a substance that's just one step away chemically. But this is stuff that they used to sell in health food stores supposedly for bodybuilding. And it acts on your body. It's sort of almost like taking alcohol. You take a teaspoon and it tells you you're going to get relaxed. You take two teaspoons and you may fall asleep. And really, yeah, it's not extremely predictable, but more important.

1:17:44 Dr. Bruce Why for how would that aid in bodybuilding?

1:17:46 Adam OK, well, that's you know, I for the life of me thought I was almost afraid to ask. I must be some obvious thing here that I'm just missing. But this is in looking at the sleep cycle. If you take this stuff and it increases the stage of sleep where you have the maximal growth hormone release, which I mean, that's if that's a remarketing scam, there it is.

1:18:09 Dr. Bruce So, well, is that is that true?

1:18:12 Adam I mean, not to the point where it's going to make any any discernible. It's sort of like, you know, a certain, all right.

1:18:18 Dr. Bruce So, listen, I have trouble getting to sleep at night. Perhaps I should investigate this GHP. Yeah. Let me ask you, can it be taken in low doses safely and effectively and all that? Or is it just bad news all the way around?

1:18:33 Adam Safely and effectively for what? I mean, what are you taking it for? People are going to take it to relax? Yeah. To go to bed. No, it's not good for inducing sleep.

1:18:43 Dr. Bruce It isn't. I thought you just said you take one teaspoon, you get relaxed, you take two.

1:18:47 Adam I see the morons that are marketing it are telling you that it builds your body by increasing growth hormone and it's not.

1:18:55 Dr. Bruce But before that, you said that you take a tea spoon.

1:18:58 Adam Just like alcohol does. Alcohol, initially you have some sleep inducing effect or you get tired and there's a rebound excitatory phase. Just like when you have a cup of coffee, you get some energy and then you go back down and have less energy.

1:19:11 Dr. Bruce That's why you never stop drinking the coffee. But here's my point. This is not good for anything. It wouldn't make you tired. If I went home and took a tablespoon when I got home, it wouldn't put me to sleep.

1:19:23 Adam Okay, not everything that gets you started at sleeping keeps you sleeping or is a safe place. Benadryl, these over-the-counter sleeping pills that you take, a lot of them change your REM sleep pattern. So there's restorative and non-restorative sleep. So it's like the patients on the addiction treatment unit, they want immediate results so they can't sleep. And I say to them, well, if I took you to the operating room, put you under anesthesia, and made you unconscious for eight hours, would that be a good night's sleep? Yep, as long as I'm not. Right. But that's not the way it is.

1:19:54 Dr. Bruce It isn't.

1:19:55 Adam So anyway, Bill, you need to get professional help getting off this stuff because it has an effect at the same, you know, there's a GABA receptor, which is the inhibitory receptor in the system. So when you take Valium, when you drink alcohol, it stimulates this receptor and it makes you feel relaxed. But once you do it every day, it's just like getting off alcohol or Valium and a little more tricky perhaps because people don't have experienced detoxing.

1:20:23 Dr. Bruce Do you see these guys coming into the ER?

1:20:26 Adam Oh, out where I am, we have the phenomenon of the raves, the all night raves. They're not, they don't allow them in the sophisticated city. So they come out to the, to the desert and they, do you ever, do you spin at those or what do you do with those?

1:20:43 Dr. Bruce Me?

1:20:43 Adam I, I spin in the ER. Oh, I was going on because individuals like to take the GHB and then have a glass of wine or beer, some alcohol. And together it makes you stop breathing. So.

1:20:56 Dr. Bruce That seems, seems like a bad combo. This stop breathing combo.

1:21:00 Adam We sort of have the teenage ventilator chorus on nights when we have, yeah.

1:21:04 Dr. Bruce Well, how does that work when you stop breathing? I mean, don't you just die in four minutes?

1:21:09 Adam Well, the paramedics, I mean, the paramedics hate it because they just sort of wait around and they put them on a ventilator, put a tube in and start breathing for them. And about four to six hours later, they wake up in unison and want to yank the tube out. You wake up very quickly. It has an on-off. But people have died. We did a case study on a woman that, she didn't die, but she was an older woman who bought it through the Internet. It was Blue Nitro or something like that. This is also being used like Rohypnol to knock out a date rape drug. But she had no idea. People believe what they read sometimes. And she bought it and her husband came home and she was unconscious. She'd been taking it for relaxation. But the difference between a therapeutic effect, the effect you want, and a toxic effect is very narrow. So this is very unsafe stuff. So Bill, let's just ask him what he's going to do because this is very serious.

1:22:04 Dr. Bruce Just tell him what to do. Don't ask him. We got to move on.

1:22:08 Adam He needs to go to a hospital. But he needs to talk to somebody that practices addiction medicine, that understands treatment of withdrawal because he could have seizures. He could get into some real serious trouble.

1:22:18 Dr. Bruce All right. Let's just squeeze in real fast here before we go to break. Andrew, you're 15. When you masturbate, urine comes out.

1:22:28 Adam Yeah.

1:22:29 Dr. Bruce Well, stop yakking yourself while you're peeing.

1:22:32 I'm not yakking myself while I'm peeing, dude. I mean, seriously, I'm scared to do anything now. I mean, I'm afraid I might be sexually dysfunctional.

1:22:41 Dr. Bruce So does sperm come out or semen come out?

1:22:46 It usually does. And then I just did it one time. And I mean, I'm scared now because urine came out. I was sure it was urine.

1:22:51 Dr. Bruce Well, it just happened one time?

1:22:53 Yeah. And now I'm afraid to do anything.

1:22:55 Dr. Bruce Well, try it again. See what happens.

1:22:57 I know, but I mean, I'm afraid I might be like sexually dysfunctional or something.

1:23:01 Dr. Bruce Well, how are you going to know unless you try it again?

1:23:04 I mean, it's kind of like now I'm like really paranoid almost.

1:23:09 Dr. Bruce I know, but you're...

1:23:12 I mean, what just happened? Like, why would that happen? Do I have like STDs or something?

1:23:17 Adam Okay, wait a second. Look, probably some clear fluid came out and you thought it was urine and it's seminal fluid or something.

1:23:23 I mean, it was urine, man. I mean, seriously.

1:23:29 Adam Okay, and that's not necessarily... No, no. Look, you're very anxious and nervous about something that sounds like it was a normal variant.

1:23:38 Dr. Bruce Listen, how does that have... Is that the prostate's job to do the closing off and the separation and all that?

1:23:46 Adam We're not going to get into... Believe me, I'm not going to get into the structure of the male... No, it's not the prostate's job to separate the...

1:23:51 Dr. Bruce We're not going to get into it because you probably have no idea how it works. It's very good, very elusive. I like that. Smart, you make a good politician. Yeah. Yeah, okay.

1:24:00 Adam Now, first of all, you're concerned about STDs if you had sex, if you had unprotected sex?

1:24:06 Caller No, but I mean, I've engaged in like other stuff than sex that might put me at risk.

1:24:12 Adam Inanimate objects or just...

1:24:14 Caller Just like oral sex.

1:24:15 Dr. Bruce Oh, wow.

1:24:16 Adam Okay, that could put you at risk for...

1:24:19 Dr. Bruce All right, go to...

1:24:22 Dr. Bruce This has been Loveline. The views expressed on Loveline are not necessarily those of the staff, the management, or the sponsors of this radio station. And are probably not the views of Westwood One Entertainment. Loveline is produced by Ann Wilkin Zingal. Now, please listen to this station longer.

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Thursday, July 15, 1999