Episode 1000754887453

0:54 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience.

0:57 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:03 Voiceover Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew.

1:05 Voiceover I'm not modeling anymore for the two of you.

1:07 Voiceover Loveline.

1:12 Drew Hey, it's Loveline.

1:13 Adam Thank you.

1:13 Drew There we go.

1:14 Adam There's my mic. All those wasted syllables saying, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Phone number for Loveline, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-44-55. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew is a board certified physician and Dixon medicine specialist. Tonight from The Mighty Mighty Bosstones, Dicky Barrett and Joe Gittleman are both here and we just couldn't be happier to see the lads. They're gonna be, before we get going, on the Leno Show, the Tonight Show, tomorrow night. That would be Thursday night. So look for them on that. And the CD, which I now have in my hand, pay attention, what is the release date on this?

1:55 It just came on a couple weeks back.

1:57 Adam Oh, it came out?

1:58 Yeah, it's been out. What the hell?

2:00 Adam How come I don't have one then? Last time you were on the show, it hadn't come out, right?

2:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, it was before May 2nd. Then on May 2nd it came out and now it's after May 2nd.

2:12 Adam What the hell am I thinking then? All right, well anyway, it's now officially out. You heard it here, kiddies, but listen to the rest of the radio show before you run over to the record store to get in line.

2:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Don't bother waiting, just head on out.

2:26 Adam Head on out? Yeah. All right, well listen.

2:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Walk man, wear your walk man.

2:29 Adam Listen in the car. The Bosstones have a nice big fat tour coming up and I'm going to give you some of those dates and some of our affiliates where they'll be coming to a town near you. If you're out here in Los Angeles, they're going to be at the Roxy tomorrow. So, you're doing Leno and then you're going to the Roxy. Is that true?

2:50 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And then we'll appear on Leno. Through the magic of television.

2:55 Adam Right, right.

2:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Don't break down that wall, Adam.

2:57 Adam Now, you know, it was really nice. Dicky called me yesterday at the office, I think, and made a very nice offering, which is I Do Something With Him in the band on Leno, but he pitched it to the people over there and they promptly shot it down.

3:13 Drew Can you tell you why?

3:15 Adam I don't know, I asked Dicky.

3:17 Drew They hate him.

3:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I didn't want to tell Adam why. They hate him, don't they? They used terms like not funny, we don't get him. And they also said, you're obnoxious enough. We don't need the two of you in there.

3:29 Adam No, seriously, how did the pitch go? What did they say?

3:32 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The pitch, I guess, went through our management.

3:34 Adam Tell them what your pitch was initially.

3:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The idea was that at the end of, we finished a song and I kind of disappear off into the audience and then you come back and you're wearing the exact same clothes and Jay says, great job guys and then all of a sudden it's just you for no other reason than I thought it would be funny and you make me laugh and when I watch the tape later, I'd pee my pants.

3:56 Adam I thought I was tremendously flattered that Dicky and the boys would make that overture.

4:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones But did you think it would be funny?

4:04 Adam I didn't care. I was so excited to potentially get on the Leno.

4:08 It was the boys who shot it down.

4:10 Adam Oh, I see it was the rest of the band.

4:11 Drew Let's have an experiment. You can find out what the Leno issue is about. They can go back and propose Jimmy, see how they take that. Go back and propose me, see how they take that.

4:20 Adam Yeah, none of us have ever done that.

4:22 Drew You can find out, you know, if they let somebody through, then you find out what the problem is.

4:26 Adam Drew, you're bitter. It's a good thing you pay that publicist $1,500 a month, isn't it? How many times you done the Leno? But the Bosstones have done the Tonight Show a handful of times, right?

4:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We've never been on that show. Really? On the Carson Show years ago. Yeah, sure.

4:43 Adam Yeah, back in the mid-70s.

4:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Steve Allen. We did Steve Allen.

4:47 Adam Oh, right.

4:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Wow, back when we were, it was more of a kind of a comedy troupe.

4:52 Adam You guys didn't do Leno with the success of the last CD? I mean, all those sold, the tours, all that stuff? Never did it?

5:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We got the same publicist as Drew.

5:06 Drew Hey, speaking of publicists and affiliates, I want to tell you something. You know how Live 105 in San Francisco moved us to midnight to 2 a.m.? Yeah. They now have a site on their website where you can vote to move it back to 10 to midnight.

5:17 Adam Oh, really?

5:18 Drew It's www.live105.com. Log on to that, tell them you want it back, and maybe it'll happen.

5:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I want it during drive time.

5:28 Adam Yeah. What about... I want it whenever the most kids are listening. When I say kids, I don't mean high school kids. I mean preschoolers. You know what I mean? I mean kids, almost infants, people that can't drive themselves, who crap themselves, those kinds of kids.

5:44 Drew This email suggests that perhaps a chorus of Who Knows What Goes On in the Old Vagina would convince them.

5:49 Adam Oh, really?

5:49 Drew To move it.

5:50 Adam All right. Should I bust into that? Who knows what goes on in the old vagina, the old vagina, the old vagina. I know what goes on in the old vagina. That's why I host the show. Yeah, I just made that up one night, but it sounded like the kind of actually my grandfather taught that one to me.

6:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's an old spiritual.

6:11 Adam He was a sailor. Yeah. Yeah.

6:13 Drew Hungarian spiritual.

6:14 Adam He's a singer.

6:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It drums up toiling. It's a song for the common man, really.

6:20 Adam It really is. It's kind of.

6:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm moved.

6:22 Adam Hey, remember back in the day, guys would sing while they were working? Like there was a working song, specific songs written to work.

6:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And what's more work than the vagina?

6:33 Adam Yeah. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

6:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I mean, some of my best work involves the vagina. Exactly.

6:39 Adam Josh?

6:40 Yeah.

6:41 Adam You're 16?

6:42 Caller Holy crap. I'm the first caller.

6:44 Adam That's right. What's up?

6:45 Caller Yeah. I'm kind of nervous. I just had a question. I just want to know if I had a sex addiction or not.

6:52 Drew What's happening? Help us make that determination.

6:56 Caller Yeah.

6:58 Adam Or just rub the phone on your crotch and we'll give you what kind of vibe we get from that, you idiot.

7:04 Caller All right. Hold on a second.

7:05 Drew Okay.

7:06 Caller I'm just kidding.

7:07 We're not.

7:09 Caller What's up? I've been calling party lines a lot.

7:13 Drew Do you pay for those?

7:15 Caller No. That's the thing. I'm probably getting the bill pretty soon and my parents are going to kick my ass.

7:19 Drew How often do you do that?

7:22 Caller I mean, as often as they can, like, as soon as they come from school, like for a couple of hours.

7:27 Adam Yeah. You got to work on your technique just a little bit more.

7:32 Drew Or make quicker?

7:33 Adam Yeah. Josh, you're whacking off, right?

7:36 Caller Yeah, of course.

7:37 Adam And the problem is, is you talk for two and a half hours before you bust your nut, right?

7:45 Caller Yeah. I've been practicing. I'm pretty good at that.

7:48 Adam Right. All right, Josh, stop calling them. Maybe you got a problem.

7:52 Drew Well, is there alcoholism in your family? Is there alcoholism in your family?

7:56 Caller On my dad's side, yes.

7:58 Drew So that could be.

7:59 Adam You better hope he's not drunk when he gets that phone bill.

8:02 Drew The thing that the basically the way you need to evaluate something like this is, is there a family history of addiction? Number one. And two, are you having consequences? And is this progressing?

8:11 Caller Yeah. Like last year, I had a problem with it, too. And the phone bill is like a thousand bucks.

8:18 Drew Well, they need to make you pay for it.

8:20 Adam Yeah, that'll do it. Boy, I'll tell you, when it comes to this kind of stuff, when you're actually two and a half hours on the phone equals six hours of flipping burgers or something, you straighten up pretty quick. Or if you don't, fine, you can pay for it. But, you know, it took me, do you guys remember this? Like, remember when you used to do this kind of stuff? Yeah. Like, you get these plans, like it'd be late, you'd be drunk, and you'd go, I'm going to go down the hill, I'm going to go buy the ATM, I'm going to get myself, no, I'm going to, then I'm going to go to the club, yeah, and I'm going to get myself a lap dance and stuff. And you know, six hours and 180 bucks later, you're at the same place you would have been at three minutes later in the safe to your phone apartment if you've just beaten off. And now I know, now I just beat off. And it's still the same plan. Now here's the plan. I'm going to beat off, then I'm going down the hill, then I'm going to the ATM, then I'm going to get a six pack, then I'm going to the club, then sounds like, okay, I'm going to beat off, then I'm going to watch four hours of TV, then I'm going to pass out. I mean, you know what I mean? It takes the edge off.

9:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Like it was yesterday, I remember it.

9:36 Adam Yeah, yeah, but you won't, if you could just, I mean, if this guy would just come home and beat off before he picks up the phone, he would never pick up the phone. Now you think before you do it, I'm going to pick up the phone anyway, but you never do, not when you're done. Chris?

9:51 Yeah, is that you?

9:52 Adam You're 16, yes.

9:53 Caller Yeah, it's nice to hear some voice that I've heard on the radio for a bit.

9:57 Adam All right, but you know, you can still hear me on the radio.

10:00 Caller Yeah.

10:01 Adam Yeah.

10:01 Caller I was going to say is that you know the question already, don't you?

10:05 Adam No, go ahead, give it to us.

10:07 Caller I have a public problem where all of a sudden I'm out in public and I don't know if it's a thought in the back of my head, but all of a sudden I'll have a little, this long is long at the time. It's very hard at the time and it's like, I don't know how to get it down or anything.

10:23 Adam Yeah.

10:23 Drew You can do what Adam did, was just put on display for the friends. Isn't that what you would do?

10:27 Adam Jesus Christ. I bear my soul on this show and you throw it in my face.

10:32 Drew You know what you said you do?

10:34 Adam I talked about not being modest in front of my high school buddies.

10:38 Drew You talked about having seen all of them erect multiple times.

10:42 Adam Yeah. Well, it can happen.

10:45 Caller They know my dad part.

10:46 Drew Don't you find that as weird? Dickie's freaked out.

10:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I find it extremely weird. You've seen all of your high school buddies, you've seen all their pieces.

10:52 Drew This is Dickie's take.

10:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What are you talking about?

10:55 Adam He's from Boston.

10:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I've been in a band with the Bosstones for 15 years. And I don't think I've seen-

11:00 Drew All of his friends.

11:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

11:01 Adam Really?

11:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I've seen many of them. Yeah.

11:03 Caller I go with Chris's.

11:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones On several things.

11:05 Caller Dude, I go with Chris's.

11:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's not right, Adam.

11:08 Adam You know-

11:08 Drew Dickie's talking about it.

11:10 Adam Hindsight is 2020, Dickie.

11:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Are you saying I'm the Monday morning quarterback?

11:16 Adam Yeah, Monday morning boner quarterback.

11:19 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You're telling me it seemed like a good idea?

11:21 Adam Yeah.

11:22 Caller Sure.

11:23 Adam I have no regrets.

11:24 Caller It's from you, dude. And Drew, it's really fun because you're really smart. I can tell. I know, Adam, you're smart.

11:30 Adam Chris, you smoke a lot of weed?

11:32 Caller No, no. They think I'm really hilarious. They think I'm really hilarious at school because I have like- I grew up with some kids that thought they were doing it.

11:42 Caller All right.

11:44 Adam It's going to get into some long-winded story about the old neighborhood. I'm not interested. He gets erections during the day. Here's the best way to stifle an erection, in my opinion.

11:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Show it to your friends.

11:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Early a.m. masturbation, I'm guessing.

11:57 Drew Kind of pants you wear.

11:58 Adam Yeah, you know, it seems like my answer for everything doesn't it? No, if you get an erection, like your penis hangs down, right? And this is what I do. Your penis hangs down and you're wearing some jeans or something and it starts getting a little blood in it and it starts pushing against the pants and starts pushing harder. Like, you know, when you're petting a dog or something and starts leaning on you a little bit, then you start petting a little harder, starts leaning on you a little harder. That's what your penis does. If you can discreetly reach down, grab your junk, yank it up against your belly. So instead of down going up, it's now up, it won't press down. It doesn't want to go that way.

12:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Happily wear it under the belt buckle.

12:37 Adam Yeah, just slide it right on under that belt buckle. And if you have a few championship rodeos under your belt and you have that full-scale hubcap size belt buckle that I proudly wore in high school, that will hide just about any schlong.

12:50 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The old rebel flag.

12:51 Adam That's right. Or the Budweiser insignia. Greg?

12:56 Caller Oh, hey?

12:57 Adam You're 15, what's up?

12:59 Caller Yeah, hey, I just wanted to say hi to the Bosstones.

13:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, hello, Greg, how are you?

13:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Are you Greg or Craig?

13:04 Caller You guys kicked serious...

13:05 Adam Greg.

13:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Greg, right, sorry.

13:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah? What?

13:07 Yeah.

13:08 Yeah, I'm like, I was just wondering if maybe like Dicky could like yell like in Dr. D. Like...

13:15 Yeah.

13:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's real for everyone, you like that?

13:19 Adam Yeah, that sounds good.

13:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I was like headphones there.

13:22 Adam Yeah, next time let me turn him up before you do it.

13:25 Drew That's it, Greg?

13:26 Caller Yeah, thanks.

13:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thanks a lot, Greg.

13:27 Drew That's it?

13:28 Caller Kick ass.

13:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's it, huh? You rule.

13:30 Adam You rule too, buddy.

13:31 Caller Hey, peace.

13:32 Adam All right, hey, where are you calling from, Greg?

13:34 Caller I'm from Westminster. It's around Hainton Beach.

13:36 Adam I see.

13:37 Caller Oh, and I got one last thing for Adam.

13:39 Adam Yeah.

13:40 Caller Okay, here you go.

13:44 Adam Yeah, nice flash.

13:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Sorry, I'd like to apologize for the Bosstones.

13:48 Adam Thanks, Greg.

13:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's classy move.

13:50 Adam Christy?

13:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Hi, I would like to say a comment to the Bosstones first.

13:55 Adam All right.

13:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones All right.

13:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I really love you guys and I'm- I can't because you guys are playing my favorite local band, the Ataris.

14:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, that's right.

14:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They're good.

14:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, the Ataris.

14:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

14:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I just love you guys and I just wanted to say that.

14:07 Adam Where are you calling from, Christy?

14:09 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Los Angeles and Arcadia.

14:10 Adam All right. Yeah, Arcadia means, I don't know, city of homes or something ridiculous.

14:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Retarded.

14:16 Adam I had some girlfriend who lived there once. She told me it meant like city of homes or something.

14:20 Drew Arcadia is like a Greek, like Valhalla.

14:24 Adam She was pretty stupid. I don't know. She's good looking now. I'd leave my girlfriend alone.

14:30 Drew You pined about her. I heard about it. Remember?

14:32 Yeah.

14:33 Adam Remember.

14:34 Drew Remember that. He told me about it.

14:36 Adam Kristy?

14:37 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

14:37 Adam So what's up?

14:38 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Okay. Well, I've been talking to this person online for about a month or two.

14:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He's 40. Forget it.

14:44 Drew Where is he?

14:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He's from San Diego.

14:46 Drew Okay.

14:47 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones But we're supposed to meet like this weekend. I was wondering if this was a good idea and like, what's your take on it?

14:53 Drew I believe I'm sort of come all the way around about online relationships. I think you got to meet quick, like preferably within about two weeks. You don't put too much fantasy into the relationships. A month's okay. Preferably, the person should be within about a 50-mile radius. You can actually have a relationship with the person. And when you go meet them, take somebody with you and meet in a public place.

15:14 Adam Or take a dog or a sidearm or something, a pool cue.

15:18 Drew A person and a dog and a pool cue.

15:19 Adam That's right.

15:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones May I suggest the Bosstone show tomorrow night at the Bronx? Yeah. Public place?

15:24 Adam Yeah.

15:25 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I really wish I can, but you see my parents are concert Nazis and they won't let me go on the show.

15:30 Adam That's rough. Is tomorrow night an all-ages show?

15:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yes.

15:34 Adam It is?

15:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

15:35 Adam You know that or are you just saying that?

15:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, I'm sure it is.

15:38 Adam Yeah, I think so.

15:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Wow, okay. Positive.

15:40 Adam All right, Christy, you can't go anyway, though. Okay. All right, so Drew, you're saying when you meet somebody online, when you go to meet them, it should be like a ransom drop.

15:51 Drew Yeah.

15:52 Adam You know what I mean? You should be wired, have some guys in the bushes looking over your shoulder.

15:58 Drew Absolutely.

15:58 Adam Guy on rooftops with binoculars and a hunting rifle.

16:02 Drew Several meetings like that before you let your guard down.

16:04 Adam Right. Then you put your phone number in a newspaper and walk past the guy, maybe a racing form, slide it under his arm, he hands it off to another guy. Yeah. I mean, God. Christie sounded, I'll just talk to her for one more second. Christie, you're not getting dates from the boys at high school?

16:25 No.

16:25 Adam What's up?

16:28 I don't know, they're just not asking.

16:29 Drew You're fat.

16:30 Adam Oh, Drew, please. Is that true?

16:32 Drew No.

16:33 Adam What's wrong with you?

16:35 I have parents.

16:37 Adam Your parents?

16:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They're a tad overprotective. That's all I can see, but that's really about it.

16:44 Adam No way. Oh, Drew, please.

16:45 Drew Her way out, maybe, is just to make contact in the way.

16:48 Adam But are you an attractive gal?

16:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm not very attractive and I'm ugly.

16:56 Adam I see.

16:57 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You're beautiful on the inside, Christie.

16:59 Caller Right.

16:59 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You sound wonderful. Yeah.

17:01 Caller Right.

17:01 Adam All right, Christie. A nice big public place, all right? All right.

17:06 Drew Yeah. Sanity the Mall.

17:09 Adam You know what she sounds like? Remember that cartoon with the rooster?

17:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

17:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Foghorn Langer.

17:17 Drew I say boy.

17:18 Adam Okay. Now, remember there was the chicken hawk he was trying to teach?

17:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

17:21 Adam Remember the chicken hawk's mom? Yeah. She was like this spinster's chicken.

17:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones She wanted a marry foghorn.

17:28 Adam She had like glasses.

17:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones She was like humping the dog.

17:31 Adam Yeah. That's kind of what Christie sounded like, which is not a great sign at 17.

17:37 Caller Kate?

17:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Hi.

17:40 Adam There you go.

17:41 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Okay. First of all, I want to say hi to Dicky because he's awesome. I met him last year at an age festival. And then I just saw him last month.

17:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Public place. Good idea. Always a good idea. If you're going to meet Dicky.

17:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The 930 Club.

17:57 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Great.

17:58 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Fantastic. Okay. Well, my problem is that when I give my boyfriend a head, he doesn't come.

18:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Where do we meet?

18:06 Drew What happens?

18:07 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones When I give my boyfriend a head, he doesn't come.

18:13 Drew There's a group of guys that that's the way it goes. It's just the way it goes.

18:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Okay.

18:17 Adam Yeah.

18:17 Drew Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. Doesn't mean there's anything wrong with him.

18:19 Adam They call themselves the Gays.

18:23 Drew No, do you know we talk to guys?

18:23 Adam Pretty tough club, those guys.

18:24 Drew We talk to guys here. The Gays are into that.

18:26 Adam Play fast and they play hard.

18:28 Drew The males are into that.

18:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's a tough nut to crack.

18:30 Adam Yeah.

18:31 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You can work all night on those guys.

18:32 Adam Yeah, you see them riding around on the scooters with the windbreakers on. The Gays. Follow me to the Gays place.

18:40 Drew It's a tough nut to crack.

18:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's a tough nut to crack to nut. They're like a Rubik's Cube when it comes to that kind of stuff.

18:46 Adam Yeah, it's rough. Just when you think you got them figured out. Hey, Kate, how old is he?

18:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones My boyfriend. He's 19.

18:54 Adam 19. All right. This happens to a lot of guys.

18:59 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones But there's more, like the lady who was screening the call cut me off.

19:02 Adam I see. What's the rest?

19:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones But I'm addicted to giving head or something. And every time I give head to anybody, I get off. And I feel bad because, like, I get off from it, and then, like, he doesn't even...

19:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Don't feel bad.

19:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

19:17 Adam Listen.

19:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Please don't feel bad.

19:19 Adam Yeah. If you... Yeah, that is his problem. Yeah. 100%.

19:22 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones When I was 19, if a girl looked at me, my gun would go off.

19:26 Adam Yeah.

19:26 Drew How bizarre is that, though, in life, that she hooks up with that one?

19:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Right.

19:30 Adam Oh, I know.

19:32 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Life's cruel irony.

19:33 Drew Yeah.

19:33 Adam It really is.

19:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Another one of God's jokes.

19:36 Adam You really have an orgasm?

19:38 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah. I don't like for guys to go down on me at all. I don't get anything out of that.

19:44 Adam Hey, you got an older sister?

19:47 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No.

19:47 No. Okay.

19:49 Adam Wow.

19:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm writing down the 930 quote.

19:51 Adam What lab are you created in? What happened to you? Did something weird happen to you?

19:57 I've been raped three times.

19:58 Adam Yeah. That sounded like something was going on. Too good to be true. What happened?

20:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, one of my cousin's friends raped me when I was 11, and then I went down on a guy that I met in Ocean City, and then he wanted to have sex, and I went to, and then he raped me, and then one of my ex-boyfriends raped me.

20:22 Adam How old were you the second time you were raped? I was 14. All right. So, you're pretty, you're doing a decent amount of acting out now, though, right? Or are you just staying with the one guy? You're doing all right?

20:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah. I've just been with him. Okay. We've been going out for, it'll be seven months. All right.

20:42 Adam You got any counseling?

20:44 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones My counselor said that I had everything pretty much together.

20:48 Adam Oh, really?

20:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

20:49 Adam He probably just wanted to leave town or something. I've had shrinks do that. You're looking good. You can go home early. Ship shape, thumbs up.

20:57 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones See his suitcases by the door.

20:59 Adam What about Bob? I haven't stopped crying yet, Doug. Yeah, that's all right. By the time you hit the car, you'll be fine. Wow. Kate?

21:09 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

21:09 Adam All right. Maybe he's going to take a little more counseling.

21:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Really?

21:14 Caller Yeah.

21:15 Adam Yeah, because here's what I see in Kate's future. I know now she's hypersexual and having orgasms with the oral sex and all that stuff, but there's going to come a time when I think some of that's going to change a little bit.

21:30 Caller You know what I'm saying?

21:31 Drew It should shut down, man.

21:32 Caller Yeah.

21:33 Adam Yeah. It's too bad I knew something was up with her.

21:35 Caller You know what I mean?

21:36 Adam Here's a girl, she doesn't like it when guys go down on her. She feels guilty because she's having an orgasm for going down on them. Man, but there's always a catch, isn't there? All right. David?

21:48 Yeah.

21:49 Adam You're 14.

21:50 Caller Yeah. I just wanted to know if there's a problem because when I masturbate, I get these red dots all over the head of my penis. I was just wondering what's up with that.

21:59 Adam All right. Hold on a second. That's not your fingernail polish coming off. Is it your fruitcake?

22:04 Caller No, it's not.

22:05 Adam All right. It's a little Don Rickles humor there, you hockey puck. We're going to take a little break. We have Joe and Dicky from the Bosstones here tonight. We're going to hear a song from the new CD. Pay attention when we come back and we'll get to David and his spotted penis after this.

22:27 Caller We'll be right back with more.

22:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Loveline.

22:59 Adam Yep, it is Loveline, Adam Corolla, that is Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191, fax number 310-854-4455.

23:13 Drew Hey, May 25th, a limited quantity of free tickets will be available at the box office.

23:19 Adam For what?

23:20 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones For Russia.

23:21 Adam Yeah?

23:22 Drew What time do you have to get there?

23:24 Adam The Mighty Mighty Bosstones are here tonight, by the way. Dicky Barrett and Joe Goodwin.

23:28 Drew What time do you have to get there for the free ticket?

23:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Doors are 8. I don't know. Get there early.

23:31 Drew So the first people there are getting free?

23:33 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, a bunch of people are going to get it. The whole show was free. It was a, you know, it was a...

23:38 Adam We're talking about the Roxy show tomorrow?

23:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Radio show, yeah. It was supposed to be at the whiskey last week, but the toilet overflowed.

23:44 Adam Right.

23:44 Caller Sewage.

23:45 Adam Right. Right. Was that just last week? I thought it was like two weeks ago.

23:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Two weeks ago, yeah. I don't know.

23:51 Adam And... What happened with that? I mean, was it that bad that the concert couldn't go on?

23:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It wasn't the toilet. It was like backflow where the sewage rose up, like four inches deep inside the whiskey.

24:02 Adam And did it...

24:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The health department shut the show down.

24:05 Adam Did it happen that...

24:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Just sound check.

24:08 Adam Oh, I see.

24:08 Caller So...

24:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones An hour before doors.

24:09 Adam How does sound check... I mean, how does it normally work when you roll into a town and you're going to play a gig? What's a normal schedule like?

24:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You're really interested in that.

24:22 Adam Yeah, I really am.

24:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, Carl usually gets there about four hours before doors. He likes to ring out the monitors and then...

24:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones John, our monitor guy, likes to fill his cooler with Pepsi. Then he heads right over the monitor board and he's tweaks and he turns...

24:34 Adam John, so Carl gets there.

24:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Johnny Rio changes all the guitar strings.

24:38 Adam How soon do you have to get there before the gig? Because I hear about a lot of bands getting there at three, four in the afternoon. Then they do a sound check. Then they go back to the hotel. Then they come back later for the gig.

24:47 Drew You could never do that.

24:49 Adam No, because once I went back to the hotel, I'd fall asleep and that'd be it.

24:52 Drew You just go, I don't need to do that.

24:54 Adam Well, Drew and I have done gigs where they said, hey, come in at 6, do the sound check, then go back to the hotel, then come back at 8 and do the gig. And I've said, all right, well, we'll do the sound check over the phone. And they're like, how are you going to do that? Well, listen, stand at the stage about where I'd be standing, hold the mic up to your mouth and talk into it. If you can hear your voice, fine.

25:17 Drew And this is where he goes, shows at 8. We'll see you at 7.55. Okay.

25:21 Adam 7.55, that's early. Because you're not going on to like 8.03. It's not right at 8.

25:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We usually hit the, we usually go there about 2 in the afternoon, roll into town.

25:30 Adam Right.

25:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We get there, 9 times out of 10, you get there at about 8 in the morning, go to the hotel, check in, sleep till about 2, go to the club, do sound check, and then by the time you finish with sound check.

25:41 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Doors are opening up.

25:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

25:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones People are coming.

25:44 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Greet the kids.

25:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Hang out.

25:46 Adam Right.

25:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Say hello, hang out. Get the vibe of the room.

25:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones See the opening band. See the Ataris.

25:51 Adam And you guys are doing the Warped Tour. Who else is on that tour? Because I know we've had some bands in here.

25:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No Effects.

25:57 Adam Right.

25:57 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Green Day.

25:58 Adam I love Green Day.

25:59 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, they're great. They're good.

26:01 Adam Green Day is, they, people take their shots at them and stuff, but for a trio, they're pretty damn good live.

26:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, that's true.

26:11 Drew They've been around a long time, too, now.

26:13 Adam Yeah, and their music, the stuff on the radio sounds pretty good, but it holds up live real well. They're a real good live band.

26:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, definitely.

26:23 Adam So who else?

26:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We see eye to eye on that, Adam, once again. I don't know.

26:26 Drew Who else is on that show?

26:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Why don't we just get married?

26:27 Drew There's a little difference on this, the friends and the erections.

26:30 Adam Glad you brought that up because I was going there.

26:32 Drew The friends and erections thing?

26:33 Adam No. Well, that's going to factor into the marriage, but Dicky and I would like to get married. You know what I mean?

26:37 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Who are we kidding?

26:39 Adam There's no woman that's going to have you and no woman you want anyway, so as much as I.

26:44 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones There's no one that sees more eye to eye than I do. Write down the line on all of your policies.

26:49 Adam You keep your place in Boston, I'll keep my place in LA, but we'll commute.

26:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Cover the codes. We'll get together, do the radio show and catch a Bosstones gig and we'll call it a relationship.

26:59 Adam We'll meet in Indiana every other weekend, like a Motel 6.

27:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Have we ever gotten together and not just wet our pants, laugh and hang out, had a good time? You never made me feel uncomfortable.

27:11 Adam No. I know how to treat a man.

27:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Never ostracize me.

27:13 Caller I make them all feel special.

27:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You are my Jimmy's monkey. That's the same thing. I just watched your sketch.

27:20 Caller That's the same thing.

27:21 Adam Hey, listen.

27:22 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Who cares?

27:22 Adam If loving another man is gay, then so be it.

27:25 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Label us. That's right. Label us.

27:27 We don't care.

27:29 Adam All right. My folks wouldn't mind. They've written me off.

27:33 Drew You guys finished?

27:33 Adam They said they wanted me to meet someone special. They didn't say what sex.

27:37 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They didn't care about.

27:38 Caller Drew, what the hell were you saying?

27:40 Adam Warped tour? What were we talking about?

27:41 Drew One of the calls. There we are.

27:43 Adam Allison.

27:44 Hey, what's up?

27:44 Adam Hey, you're 17. What's up?

27:46 Caller Yeah. Okay.

27:46 Well, first I just want to say hi to Dicky.

27:48 Caller I'm going to go see you guys warped tour June 29th. So I'm really excited.

27:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Excellent. We're looking forward to seeing you there.

27:54 Caller Okay. So anyways.

27:55 Adam Where's the one? That's in Anaheim. That's at the pond.

27:57 Caller Okay. Well, I have a boyfriend and like not. Well, kind of recently, like we'll be watching a movie or something. We'll be just hanging out and he'll full on, like, whip it out and start jacking off like in front of me. And it's like really awkward and I don't know what to say to him.

28:16 Drew What does he think he's doing?

28:17 Caller What does he think I'm doing?

28:19 Drew No, what does he think he's doing? What's the point of this?

28:21 Caller Like, I just, I want to know how to like have him stop.

28:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What kind of movies are we talking about you're watching when this happens? What kind of movies?

28:29 Caller Like, all kinds.

28:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, give me a title so I can just picture this scenario.

28:34 Caller I don't know, like...

28:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Isn't Tom Hanks cute? Such a sweet story. Oh, what are you doing?

28:40 Caller It's not like a tick flick or anything.

28:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He doesn't give you any warning?

28:44 Caller No, like full on no, he doesn't. Like, and then...

28:47 Adam Full on no? And how old is he?

28:50 Caller He's 19.

28:51 Drew What does he think he's up to? What is the purpose of this?

28:54 Caller What's the purpose of it?

28:56 Drew Does he think it's going to... It's attracting you in some way or that it's...

28:59 Caller I have no clue.

29:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Funny? Is he a funny naked guy? I know a lot of those guys.

29:04 Caller Shocked and I don't know what to say to him.

29:05 Drew Do you want him to stop?

29:07 Caller Yeah, like full on the first time I was like, what are you doing? You know? And like he was like, what?

29:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He was surprised by your reaction.

29:16 Drew Are there other people at home?

29:18 Caller I was like kind of shocked that he just did this.

29:20 Drew Do you have parents at home or anything when this happens?

29:22 Caller No. Like I thought maybe I should just like help him out and it wouldn't be that awkward.

29:27 Drew And like, that's what he's looking for.

29:29 Adam That's his plan. Yeah.

29:30 Caller Join in. He didn't want my help.

29:34 Adam He what?

29:34 Caller Yeah. He didn't want my help.

29:36 Adam He didn't. So what do you want to do? Just finish without you?

29:41 Caller I guess.

29:42 Adam Do you guys have sex?

29:43 Caller Yeah.

29:44 Adam And pretty regular sex?

29:46 Caller Yeah. There's absolutely like nothing that's not normal besides this.

29:51 Adam Wow. You think he has some kind of brain tumor or something?

29:55 Caller I don't know.

29:56 Adam But you don't think he's saying to you, I want sex when he pulls his penis out and does this?

30:02 Caller Honestly, I don't think so.

30:04 Adam And he'll do it sitting right next to you while you're watching TV?

30:07 Caller Yeah. On the couch.

30:08 Drew And won't let you engage in any activity?

30:10 Caller Like at first I like try and he just like kind of like turned over.

30:16 Adam Yeah. But here's the problem. If you really want to stop, you can't laugh while you're saying it.

30:21 Caller Like what do you mean?

30:22 Adam Huh? Oh, man. Hey, Allison, maybe he just thinks you're so thick you're not going to notice. You know what I mean? He may look at you as like a cigar store Indian or something.

30:33 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Maybe he's got a buddy across town doing the same thing and they're comparing notes the next day too.

30:37 Right. Okay.

30:39 Adam Hey, Allison, listen, if you want him to stop, you're going to have to tell him to stop.

30:44 Drew Firmly.

30:45 Adam And try not to-

30:45 Drew Or leave or ask him to leave if he doesn't stop.

30:47 Adam Try not to work full in before stop.

30:49 Drew Full on.

30:50 Adam Full on. I mean, just say stop.

30:52 Drew And don't giggle.

30:53 Caller I'm not giggling, but I'm telling you that, like I've told him before that I'm like, I don't like that.

30:59 Adam Yeah, but you're laughing. And let me give you some lessons, all right? Okay. All right. Let's fast forward. I was going to say pretend I'm masturbating, but just to fast forward two hours and let's say I am masturbating because of-

31:13 Drew You will be.

31:14 Adam 1234. Yeah. Full on. And I'm masturbating. You want me to stop? You ready? Here we go. Oh man, this feels good. Oh, do I love myself.

31:25 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, giggle, giggle, man.

31:26 Adam Yeah, this is good.

31:28 Yeah, okay.

31:30 Caller Yeah.

31:31 Caller Oh, this makes me uncomfortable.

31:33 Caller Stop.

31:34 Adam Okay. Now try not to say like Charlie Brown's teacher.

31:38 Caller Yeah.

31:38 Drew And laugh at the same time.

31:40 Adam This makes me uncomfortable. Please.

31:43 Caller But before, I'm like, you know, I don't like it when you do this. And he's like, oh, okay.

31:48 Adam All right, we'll kick him out next time. Consequences.

31:51 Drew Yeah, call the police.

31:53 Adam Oh, please.

31:53 Drew Come on.

31:54 Adam Don't call the police, you idiot.

31:55 Drew If he won't leave, she will kick him out, you can do this stuff. Listen.

32:00 Adam Listen. Let me tell you something. Everyone's calling the police for everything. And meanwhile, I'm getting raped in my basement by gang members because the cops are rolling on the whack calls.

32:10 Drew The point I'm trying to make, though, is that she needs to be prepared.

32:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What is the number on the whack calls?

32:13 Drew To do whatever is required to get it.

32:15 Adam It's staggering.

32:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What do they call that? What's the number on it?

32:19 Adam Oh my god.

32:20 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I got a 39 in progress here.

32:24 Adam Ryan?

32:25 Caller Yeah?

32:26 Adam You're 16. What's up?

32:27 Caller Yeah, I just had a question for the Bosstones.

32:30 I saw you guys at Jamboree last Saturday.

32:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Okay.

32:36 Adam Is that that kid's store? Oh, that's Jimberi.

32:40 Caller That's something else.

32:41 Caller Yeah, that's here in Chicago.

32:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We were doing in-store appearance at Jamboree.

32:46 Adam They may have been opening a new one. I don't know.

32:48 Caller Things have been slow.

32:49 Adam The record just came out.

32:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I thought he said the Clamboree. Or is this something that I go to every year in South Boston?

32:56 All right, Ryan.

32:57 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones So what did you think of the Jamboree?

32:59 Caller I thought it was great.

33:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thanks, man.

33:01 When are you guys coming back to Chicago?

33:04 I don't know.

33:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We got those tour dates.

33:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Is there anything for Chicago on your lap?

33:09 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones To go that far?

33:10 Adam Let's see. Well, let's see. They're going to be in Henderson, Nevada. That's just a stone's throw. I mean, you couldn't get out there if you planned it.

33:21 Drew Where the hell is Henderson?

33:23 Adam It's in Nevada. Cleveland, Minneapolis, Brighton, Salt Lake City, Missouri County, Boise.

33:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Are we playing Henderson again? We're really hammering that market.

33:32 Adam Yeah, Henderson. Yeah.

33:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Have you played Henderson?

33:35 Adam Car Country Boulevard. They're opening another dealership. What the hell?

33:41 Caller Come on down.

33:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We're giving them away.

33:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Slashing prices.

33:45 Adam Geez, I don't see anything. Here it is. Well, you guys. Oh yeah. Well, that was a week ago. That's right. I see.

33:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's the Jim Burry.

33:54 Adam I see. Yeah. It's at the Jim Burry. It's at the Deerfield Mall out there, right?

34:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I just want to say, Ryan, we'll be there soon.

34:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We'll be there. All right.

34:04 Adam They're coming for you, Ryan. All right. You saw them last week though, right?

34:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

34:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We played. We played.

34:10 Adam Give it a rest.

34:11 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We played a couple of weeks before that too in Chicago, didn't we?

34:13 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah. With the Metro there.

34:15 Adam The Jamboree is a Q101.

34:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's right.

34:18 Adam You guys did dig our fabulous affiliate over there.

34:20 Drew Oh my God. It's quite a quite a sort of interesting array of.

34:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Look at the number. Look at the days.

34:25 Drew I mean the schedule.

34:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones One after another.

34:27 Drew You'll see it's, you know, it's Paris, Stratford, Brussels, Bremen, Copenhagen, Fresno, Chula Vista. Yeah. I mean, it's bizarre.

34:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The Kill Dicky Tour.

34:36 Drew Missoula.

34:37 Adam Yeah. Very eclectic.

34:38 Drew Let's say wow.

34:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Let me let me give you. This is this is what Missoula is going to be. Hello, Missoula.

34:43 Adam Yeah.

34:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We're the Bosstones.

34:45 Adam Yeah. Hey, Dicky, what are you doing? You rest.

34:47 Caller How are you?

34:49 Adam Adam can't do the show next month. You're not going to eff up your throat, are you?

34:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones By Missoula, sure. This is like one after another. Yeah. It's like one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.

35:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Come on. We're going on eight years of this now, though, you know?

35:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

35:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You reach a level where.

35:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And I started the ballgame with an effed up throat.

35:07 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

35:07 Adam Yeah, I know. But man, it just seems like such a grind. And Jill, yeah, you're 17.

35:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

35:13 Adam What's up?

35:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, unfortunately, I have been having my period for like weeks now, it seems like. And it normally doesn't last.

35:21 Adam You sure you weren't just stabbed in the side?

35:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Real funny. No, seriously, I usually only have my period eight to like 10 days. And I'm only 12. That's long.

35:30 Drew That's long right there.

35:31 Adam Eight to 10 days.

35:33 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's an inherited thing. My mom's is really long too. I get migraines. I get sick to my stomach. It's a whole big family thing. But this is lasting really, really long.

35:41 Drew Have you been checked to see if you have polycystic ovarian disease?

35:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah. And my mom took me to OBGYN.

35:47 Drew Right.

35:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And I go regularly because of my past history.

35:51 Drew Of? Past history of?

35:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I started my period really, really early.

35:55 Drew How old?

35:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I was in like fifth grade.

35:58 Adam And your mom is this way and her mother's this way?

36:00 Drew Yeah.

36:01 Adam Yeah. You know, later on, if you have a daughter, you have to kill her.

36:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, I should.

36:06 Adam They're right there in the hospital. It's a humane thing to do. Ten-day period, cramps.

36:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I've ever experienced in my life.

36:13 Drew You don't have polycystic ovarian disease, is that?

36:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, I don't. They test me for it, I think once a year. I go twice a year and they test me for it once a year, just to see if anything pops up.

36:22 Drew How do they test you? Ultrasound?

36:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They do all sorts of tests. They do-

36:26 Drew Ultrasound?

36:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What?

36:27 Drew Ultrasound?

36:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, they've done ultrasound. They sometimes do x-rays just to see if something pops up. And then they do obviously the pap smear and stuff like that.

36:36 Drew So they think you might have that?

36:38 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They think it's a possibility in the future, but they haven't found it.

36:41 Drew Okay.

36:41 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Check for it every single-

36:42 Drew All right. So if you have very irregular periods, you have very irregular periods and then you're having one of those episodes now. You don't have thyroid problems?

36:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, I have no thyroid. They check for that too.

36:51 Drew You're not a medication?

36:52 Adam If you have very irregular periods for long enough, doesn't that become regular, irregular periods? I mean, when you're counting on something being irregular, does it eventually become regular?

37:03 Drew Do you want any medication? No. Why don't you go on the pill?

37:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, that's what I was about to ask you. Somebody told me, my best friend offered me her birth control pills.

37:11 Drew No, no, no.

37:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, I'm going to take it because you don't mix medication with somebody else. But anyway, she told me that birth control pills, after you take them for a couple of months, it really helps your period.

37:22 Drew A lot.

37:22 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, I know. I asked my mom and she doesn't have a problem with it. The only thing she's worried about is it might screw up my cycle even more.

37:28 Drew No, it takes care of it.

37:31 Adam How come you got to hear this from Drew? I mean, all these tests, this is a battery of tests. Quiet down.

37:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Repentive.

37:38 Drew Who is?

37:38 Adam Would you shut up, Jill? Jesus Christ. I get to three syllables into an insult and you're jumping right in.

37:43 Drew I want to hear what she said though.

37:44 Adam Well, I want to know why the doctors aren't telling you to do this. Now she's saying, well, listen, if I bled for 10 days straight, I guess I'd be irritable too.

37:56 Drew Jill?

37:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I want to know if her parents were still married.

37:58 Drew Jill? What? Why didn't your physicians, your doctors talk to you about being on the pill? Or did they?

38:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, they told me the present conflict without my mom in the room. And I was a little uneasy about it.

38:12 Drew But they recommended it, didn't they?

38:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, they did.

38:14 Drew Okay, we'll get on the pill, okay?

38:16 Caller Well, what...

38:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Before I go, do you recommend any sort of brand?

38:22 Drew The uniphasic ones tend to be a little better in this kind of situation. Okay. So, all right.

38:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Can I ask my question?

38:27 Adam Yeah.

38:28 Drew Sure.

38:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Jill, are your parents still married?

38:30 Caller No.

38:32 Drew What was that about?

38:32 Adam A dance day with them?

38:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, what kind of hell the father was in.

38:39 Adam Sounds like... He married...

38:41 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's my own personal things, I just need to know.

38:43 Adam He married Carrie.

38:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Ten days.

38:46 Adam Hey, Drew? Did Jill sound extraordinarily pissed off? I mean...

38:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, she was all right.

38:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones She sounded smart.

38:53 Adam No, but here's the thing that was going...

38:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You know what I think? I think she isn't sexually active, and that's why she was so uncomfortable with being on the pill. It sounded like to me.

39:02 Adam I understand, but it's like if your doctor tells you, hey, you have this bona fide condition, you're going to the doctor all the time, you're getting pap smears and...

39:11 Drew You're learning...

39:12 Adam .ultrasounds and all this kind of stuff, and then pulls you aside and says, hey, here's what's going to clear it up. No, wait a minute, I want to discuss for a second, because Jill sounded like really angry at her mom, like, well, he told me while my mom wasn't in the room, but then I wasn't going to this or that, and she was like really pent up and really pissed off and anxious, and hey, Jill, just take the goddamn pill. I mean, who cares what your mom thinks, and you're taking it not because you're sexually active, but to help this condition out. You know what I'm saying?

39:44 Drew Yeah.

39:44 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones All right.

39:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Picture the mom.

39:47 Adam Drop the attitude just a little bit.

39:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And Jill.

39:49 Caller Well, all right.

39:51 Adam Hey, Drew, does psychology have anything to do with the period? You know what I mean?

39:56 Drew Yeah.

39:57 Caller You know what I'm saying?

39:58 Adam Can you have an angry vagina?

40:00 Drew Oh, sure.

40:01 Adam Yeah.

40:01 Caller Yeah, I've come across a few of them.

40:03 Drew It was interesting though. Spiteful. The people that go to doctors, you work it all out, you figure out what's going on. They're like, well, I'm not going to let the man talk me into anything. They're just taking advantage of me. It's like, oh, wait a minute.

40:13 Adam Yeah, but see, listen, this is your problem, and I know we're running late for breakthrough, but this is why I finally yanked the phone from your hand when we were in the back of the limo. Where were we?

40:23 Drew New York?

40:24 Adam On the way to the airport. Drew deals with these old codgers. They're all these patients or these 85-year-old Jews who just call and talk his ear off constantly. Maybe I was on a couple hours sleep, maybe I had a couple beers in me. I don't know what kind of mood I was in, but I was done listening to Drew's second-hand conversations with his old fart patients. We're in the back of a limo and he's on his cell phone. He's like, Mrs. Wittenberg, you're going to have to go in the hospital this weekend because it's important that you see a physician. No, not Monday, this weekend. Well, no, it can't be done over the phone. I'm telling you, you're going to have to. Well, you're asking me and I'm telling you, you have to go in to get a checkup. No, I can't do it from here. No, you have to. I find the grandfather, listen, you old bat, you're going to the hospital. Why are you calling? What are you asking? If the guy tell you, you're calling and asking, and he's telling you to go do it, that's it. Who is this?

41:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Put Drew back on the phone.

41:28 Adam I'm not lying either.

41:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You're not a nice man.

41:31 Adam I yell in, throw the phone right back, I mean, yelled at Drew for not hanging up on her. But listen, here's how I would do it. If I'm wasting my time looking up someone's vagina, wait a minute. If I'm wasting my time with some old fart in there and I'm explaining, I'm taking my time and my expertise, explaining to them how it's going to go and they ain't listening, I'm yelling at them at that point. They're getting hit with a handful of birth control on the way out in the back of the head like Buckshot.

41:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Were you laughing, Drew, when he did that?

41:58 Adam He liked it. He was glad. He felt empowered. For the first time in his life, he felt like a man. All right, we'll take a break. The Bosstones are here. We'll be back.

42:07 Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191, back in a minute.

42:11 Adam Well, it's worth hearing. Yep, it is Loveline. If you want him. Phone number, 1-800-L-A-V-E-1-9-1, Dicky Barrett and Joe Gittleman are both here from The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Pay attention, it's the name of the CD. I command everyone within the sound of my voice to go out and get it. A Bosstones CD never disappoints.

43:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's nice of you.

43:00 Adam Yeah. I really do believe that. I want to mention, I forgot the man show was on tonight. I want to get that plug in.

43:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Is that okay with you, Drew?

43:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Is it one we've seen before?

43:11 Drew Is that okay that he plugs that?

43:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, is that right with you?

43:12 Drew We should sit down at the videotape that we were supposed to, we were mandated to see it.

43:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What do we got? What skits we got tonight?

43:17 Drew It's about 10 minutes on Plugola.

43:20 Adam We got a couple more.

43:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You on the crappler, you on the toilet?

43:23 Adam We got a couple more to watch tonight.

43:25 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Trampoline.

43:25 Adam Drew's jealous because I'm going places. He's going to Boston to see if he can get his old job back to college.

43:32 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Jealous or embarrassed?

43:34 Drew A little bit of both.

43:35 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, a comment. And pride. And some others' pride worked in that.

43:39 Adam I think you did.

43:39 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Strange.

43:40 Adam All right. Let's listen to the new single from Pay Attention. Cued up there, Anderson? This one's called So Sad to Say. No, another good one by the Bosstones. Pay attention, yes. Lightning has struck twice. Drew, don't belch in the mic. We're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back with more of the Bosstones after this.

47:08 Caller Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. We'll be right back.

47:54 Adam Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Drew. Joe Gittleman and Dicky Barrett are both here from the mighty, mighty, mighty Boss Tones. You can see them tomorrow night at the Roxy here in LA. And-

48:09 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Come down, line up. There will be some tickets available for free. You know, this is free. Did we mention this is free? That's the crazy thing about it.

48:15 Adam The entire concert is free?

48:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The entire concert is free.

48:19 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We won't get paid, Joe.

48:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We won't get paid. The tickets were free.

48:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You didn't tell me that before we left Bosstone.

48:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones There will be tickets available for free tomorrow.

48:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Whose idea was this?

48:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It doesn't make any sense.

48:32 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones This comes out of my pocket.

48:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Everything was free but the airline tickets to come out here, so.

48:37 Adam And you guys, in order to get these free tickets, you got to hit the Roxy box office sometime early tomorrow.

48:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, early, before 8 o'clock doors, I think.

48:47 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We haven't worked it all out yet.

48:48 There's still some bugs in the door.

48:50 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The point is, we've never given anything away before.

48:53 Adam The Bosstones for free tomorrow night at the Roxy.

48:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones We know how to sell stuff really well.

48:56 Adam And then when you get home, if you want to watch them for free again, you can turn on Leno and check them out for free on the Tonight Show. All right, and listen tonight. They'll be sitting here for free. Lisa?

49:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

49:08 Adam You're 25. What's up?

49:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones OK, I think the screener misunderstood my question a little. What I wanted to know is, it seems like wherever I live, my neighbors have really loud, noisy sex. It is a little annoying, but that's not totally my question.

49:23 Caller It's more that-

49:26 Adam Yeah.

49:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones All right. I wonder if it's how normal that is and how much it's just acting like they've seen too many porn movies. Because I don't feel like, I don't know, I just don't feel like that's normal and wanted to get some guy's opinions about that.

49:40 Adam Well, if it happens to you everywhere you go, then something's up with you, I'd say.

49:45 Drew How can she have anything to do with that?

49:47 Adam No, she's just ultra sensitive.

49:49 Drew I see.

49:50 Adam I mean, we don't notice.

49:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, no, it's just like, well first of all, I don't sleep, I sleep really late at night and so.

49:56 Adam You go to bed early.

49:58 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh.

49:58 Drew Go to bed late.

49:59 Adam Is that what you're saying, go to bed late?

50:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And I go to bed late.

50:01 Adam You go to bed late, like what time?

50:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh God, anytime between one and three.

50:07 Adam Uh-huh, and you're living in apartments, right?

50:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Apartments.

50:11 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Motel, cheap motel, that's the problem. It's mostly like hourly motel.

50:15 Drew Around like college kids, that sort of thing?

50:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's what it is.

50:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Just, you know, especially since I've graduated.

50:21 Adam And how are you doing with sex?

50:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Right now, not much, but...

50:26 Adam Surprised, and how's it been in the past?

50:29 Um, but not that loud.

50:32 Adam Not that loud. All right, and when's your last relationship?

50:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh gosh, it was actually like a year and a half ago.

50:39 Drew Today's Wednesday, there.

50:40 Caller Let's see, and let's see, the 23rd was Monday, four years. Let's see.

50:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No.

50:47 Adam All right, so it's been a year and a half since you've been with a man. So it's a pretty good haul for a 25-year-old gal these days.

50:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm a little too picky.

50:57 Adam Yeah, you see what I'm getting at here?

50:58 Drew Yeah, yeah, how many times has this actually happened?

51:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Um, in three places that I've lived.

51:03 Drew And you've been three different people each time?

51:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones My main question is, not so much that it has happened, because I think that's just coincidental. More that I guess I just want to know more of a guy's opinion on whether that is something that guys like or if that's normal.

51:20 Drew The vocalization.

51:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, just really being so loud, it doesn't seem natural to me. I guess my question is, is there something wrong with me for being quieter?

51:29 Adam I don't find it a distraction unless you're getting it on in the bathroom of an airplane or something and then it gets a little weird.

51:38 Drew Is it a distraction or is it desirable?

51:40 Adam I like it, but I love it when they fake that ecstasy that way. I think it's wonderful.

51:47 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones That's my problem with it.

51:48 Adam You think it's funny?

51:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, it's funny. I know I'm not that good.

51:51 Adam Yeah, but- Dr. Drew, knock it off. I'm trying to talk. Yeah, but some women are a little bit crazy, vocalized like chimpanzees. That's fine if you're out in the middle of the desert camping or something, but when you're in a small hotel or you're in an apartment with people above you and below you kind of thing, it's a little distracting because if you can hear the guys TV coming through the wall, you sure as hell can hear her yelling, saying daddy, you know, at the top of her lungs.

52:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, so like from Drew, I guess from more of a doctor perspective, do you think that that is just per person or do you think it's a little bit like, it just always comes across as acting to me?

52:34 Drew No, I think that people who don't do that have difficulty understanding where that comes from.

52:39 Adam Right.

52:40 Drew And the people that do it do it rather spontaneously and don't seem to have much control over it.

52:44 Adam Hey, Lisa?

52:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

52:46 Adam Let's get back to the real problem. A year and a half since a man has visited you? A year and a half since you've had sex?

52:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

52:55 Adam Maybe two years?

52:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, about a year and a half.

52:57 Adam And what's up with the layoff?

53:00 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The layoff is probably just, it probably takes a lot of analyzation but I'm real picky with guys. I just find that I don't like to sleep around and I like to be in a committed relationship and I haven't found one.

53:14 Caller All right.

53:15 Adam You're a little uptight about sex, what did you say?

53:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Not once I'm in a relationship, no.

53:19 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Come on Adam.

53:20 Caller For that, yes.

53:21 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones All right. The new millennium what, everyone's got to be out there just humping away for you, huh?

53:26 Adam I'm just getting a little uptight vibe thing going from Lisa and I've got to say I'm not surprised it's been a year and a half since a man has been in her bed.

53:33 Drew A little uptight is not a bad thing and she just sounds uptight as compared to who we normally talk to here.

53:38 Adam Yeah, prostitutes usually come in to the show in porn stars.

53:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm definitely not like a lot of the other callers.

53:45 Adam All right there, Lisa.

53:46 Drew You're fine.

53:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones First of all, you're 25.

53:48 Adam But, Lisa, you're 25. Imagine, way to your 55.

53:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, I'll be pretty upset if I don't find someone by then.

53:55 Adam No, I don't mean that. I just mean your attitude. You're going to go next door and turn the hose on you, kids, and you're humping.

54:04 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm not annoyed by the name.

54:05 Adam You're confounded humping and all your vocalizations. All right, Lisa.

54:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Fast cars, zipping up and down the road.

54:15 Adam And your fancy hairdos.

54:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones With the multi-colored hair and the na-na-na music.

54:20 Adam Your $50 shoes.

54:22 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And the humping, humping, humping all the time.

54:24 I can't sleep.

54:26 Adam Lisa, you got to get a noisemaker. That's what I got.

54:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What's that?

54:31 Adam It's a thing that makes noise. No, here's what I'm saying.

54:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's got the eye fold, the ear boxes.

54:37 Adam That's right. Now I got the thing that makes the sound of the ocean.

54:40 Drew Oh no, he's got the lovey eye shades.

54:43 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I got that too.

54:43 Drew He's got the big padded one. With the fur on the outside. He's got the ear plugs.

54:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He's got the ear plugs and about a pound of cotton.

54:52 Drew He's got the big fluffy slippers.

54:54 Adam And I now have the sound maker, which is Lisa, listen to me, go down to one of these places.

55:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Sharper image will be there where it will be there tomorrow.

55:05 Drew In curlers.

55:06 Adam That's right. And I put my green mud pack on my face. Whatever happened, all those good cold cream jokes from the 70s. That's something I'd like to see. You know, I sit here on the show and wax on about stuff that's missing from television.

55:21 Drew No, Vanishing Cream.

55:22 Adam Vanishing Cream was good too, but that was a cartoon thing. We were talking a couple weeks ago about what happened to Quicksand. You know, every third guy used to fall into some Quicksand. I told Drew, when I was nine, I thought there was a 50-50 chance I would be taken by Quicksand before my 30th birthday. And that was a conservative estimate. Quicksand killed like one out of three people in the world.

55:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You'd be in the woods and you'd see a mud puddle and think, I could be Quicksand.

55:49 Adam That's right. It's gone now. But here's what used to be the old 60s, 70s sitcom gag too, was a woman with the big cold cream thing. So she had like the raccoon eyes, you know, and the cold cream all of the face, the curlers, the nightgown. The husband comes home drunk. The husband comes home drunk, she hears some noises. What? She thinks there's a prowler. She turns the corner to the door.

56:11 Caller He turns the corner to the door.

56:12 Adam They both scream because she looks like a monster with the cold cream and the curlers.

56:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Mrs. Crabtree.

56:19 Adam Mrs. Crabtree. Yeah, the neighbor.

56:22 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm thinking about Evers teacher.

56:24 Adam Gladys, get away from the window.

56:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What was the name? Abner?

56:29 Adam Yeah.

56:29 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Abner.

56:31 Adam Gladys, get away from the window. That's Stephen's woman is possessed. Get away from the window.

56:37 Caller Hi.

56:38 Adam Hello. Robert?

56:40 Yeah.

56:40 Adam You're 21. What's up?

56:43 Caller Yeah, I'm 21. I'm dating a 16-year-old, and I'm having some issues with the age difference.

56:48 Drew So are we.

56:49 Caller Yeah.

56:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Speak for yourself. I'm out of this one.

56:53 Caller Well, my problem is that at first, I thought she was mature for her age. She's taking second-year calculus, so on and so forth. Really intelligent.

57:04 Adam Well, she's good at math. I mean, that's fair game.

57:08 Drew Yeah, mature for her age doesn't mean anything to me. That means you haven't been able to get a date.

57:16 Adam You can't get a date at your own age.

57:18 Drew That's what it usually means.

57:22 Caller Well, I've been dating women older than me for the past three years, and this is an anomaly for me.

57:29 Adam Where did you meet her?

57:31 Caller Actually at a coffee house I go to.

57:33 Adam And what are you into? Dungeons and Dragons? A little bit?

57:39 Caller No.

57:40 Adam You've dabbled.

57:41 Caller I used to role play about five, eight years ago.

57:46 Adam There you go. I got that vibe. No, it's Kafka and Kierkegaard. What do you do for a living? Something with computers?

57:53 Caller Actually, I do some computer stuff. I work at a gas station. I work at a movie theater. I put in about 100 hours a week.

57:59 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Theater, movie theater.

58:01 Adam 100 hours a week?

58:02 Caller Yeah.

58:04 Adam I just, Drew, I think there's only 80 hours in a week. How many hours are there in a week?

58:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones If there's that many in a week, somebody do the math for us.

58:11 Adam Wait a minute. Listen, this always drives me nuts when people go, they work 100 hours a week because it's damn near impossible. If you have one job like when you're doing your residency, Drew, and you could sleep in a broom closet standing up and still not punch out, you could get 100 hours a week. But just if each job is 15 minutes apart, you can't get 100 hours a week. And if you have three or four jobs like that, can you?

58:38 Drew Well, if you knock, you know, 158 hours a week.

58:42 Adam Well, listen, 15 hours a day is 105, right? Seven days a week, right?

58:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I'm trying to write this down.

58:53 Adam So it'd be more than 14 hours, right? It'd be like 14 and a half hours a day, seven days a week, no days off ever. And if you did take one day, one day off, then you'd have to work like 17 and a half, eight, you have to work 18 hours a day, six days a week. I think that's kind of impossible, isn't it?

59:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And hit the coffee shop and meet the young broads.

59:20 Adam When do you have time to cruise for an underage prune?

59:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He's drinking a lot of coffee, though, that's keeping him up for the 100 hours.

59:29 Caller Doing 100 hours a week is because we're down to two people working at my store.

59:35 Adam All right, Robert, you sound like a decent enough guy, but 16 is too young. It just is.

59:41 Caller Well, she's trying to tell me that, oh, I turned 17 in like a month.

59:46 Drew Yeah, that's not bad about it.

59:49 Adam Good, that's good. That's a good sign.

59:51 Drew You have a conscience, that's right.

59:52 Adam You gotta break things. Are you having sex with her?

59:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Um, that's a yes.

59:58 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Where do you find the time, man?

1:00:00 Adam Are you having sex?

1:00:01 Caller Um, it's being pushed. The issue is being pushed and I'm trying to avoid it.

1:00:05 Adam Yeah. Did you see me shaking my head no when I asked? You know, it's the Dungeon...

1:00:10 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Before you have sex with her, dude, get another job. Get some more part-time work.

1:00:15 Adam Alright. Listen, break up, please. And give her a retainer back and call it off. That's it. It's over. Terry?

1:00:27 Hi.

1:00:28 Adam Hey, you're 23. What's up?

1:00:30 Caller How's my service? Can you hear me?

1:00:31 Adam Yes.

1:00:32 Caller Okay. I'm calling because my boyfriend had surgery and he had a catheter put in him. He was supposed to wait, like, I don't know, three weeks or something to have surgery, but you know, you guys never wait. So five, like, four days later, we had sex and he shot this, like, enormous swab and I was wondering if that was normal.

1:00:52 Drew What was the surgery?

1:00:53 Adam It was so rusty she needed a tetanus shot.

1:00:57 Drew That's a good time. What was the surgery?

1:01:00 Caller It was.

1:01:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It was like a bullet.

1:01:04 Caller Hello.

1:01:04 Drew What was the surgery?

1:01:05 Caller Go ahead there.

1:01:07 Caller It was on his neck. It was spinal surgery.

1:01:11 Adam I see. Just basic neck surgery, elective neck surgery.

1:01:14 Drew What was the surgery?

1:01:15 Adam I'm going to go and give myself some neck surgery, maybe over the long way.

1:01:18 Drew Did he have a laminectomy? A what? Laminectomy?

1:01:23 Caller No.

1:01:23 Drew What did he have done?

1:01:25 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Did he have a necklectomy?

1:01:27 Caller I don't know what that is. I don't think so, because I never heard him say that before.

1:01:31 Adam Did he have a narcoleptic knee?

1:01:33 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Does he have narcolepsy?

1:01:35 Caller Okay, you guys are...

1:01:36 Adam All right, well listen, Terry, you don't know what your boyfriend had a pretty major surgery, you don't know what it was for?

1:01:41 Caller Well, I know it was for his spine, I know it was for his neck, but he goes into detail, something about the discs and...

1:01:46 Drew All right, so it was a laminectomy, all right, and so he then was supposed to not have sex? The catheter.

1:01:53 Caller Well, just, oh, because he took bone out of his hip.

1:01:56 Drew I see, and that was supposed to wait three weeks?

1:01:59 Caller Yeah, it was like three weeks or something.

1:02:00 Drew And he waited four days instead? Right.

1:02:03 Adam And he pulled the catheter out himself?

1:02:05 Caller Oh no, he had the catheter removed the next day after surgery.

1:02:09 Drew So how many days had it been since you guys were together?

1:02:13 Caller Oh, like the day before he went into surgery.

1:02:15 Drew Okay. I don't think it was... Three weeks. I don't know why that would happen. That's not a typical thing.

1:02:21 Caller It's not? Is that weird though?

1:02:23 Drew No, but it's just not a typical thing.

1:02:24 Adam Well, Drew, how does that work? She said he had a catheter. I assumed he had one for a while, but he had it taken out the next day. So I don't know where that factor is in here. But then why would they tell him not to have sex for three weeks? Because he just didn't want to exert himself?

1:02:40 Drew Yeah, he had bone removed from his hip and grafted it to his neck.

1:02:44 Adam That's what I love about guys. And you know, the beauty is, the doc told him, three weeks off sex, take a week off work. Well, he was back on top of his old lady in four days, but he's still home from work. You know, he's called in. Yeah, I know it's been 11 months, but the hip's still bad.

1:03:02 Caller I'm still using a cane. I'm in quite a bit of pain.

1:03:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Getting tons of play, though.

1:03:06 Adam Yeah, I mean, guys, really, that's all you need to know about guys. You tell a woman, you tell a woman three weeks off, off the vagina, and that's it.

1:03:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones A month.

1:03:15 Adam Yeah, they'll go, you know what?

1:03:17 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's shutting down.

1:03:18 Adam He said three weeks, but he said, I think he met a month. Yeah, let's just round up to a month. Guy, three extra times.

1:03:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Not going to hurt.

1:03:25 Adam Yeah, three weeks. It sounds like three days. That's what I love. John.

1:03:30 Caller Yeah.

1:03:30 Adam You're 24.

1:03:31 Caller I am indeed.

1:03:32 Adam Do you think a woman has ever soaked off a forearm cast? You know what I mean? Remember when they used to be plaster? How many guys? One out of every three guys who got a plaster cast soaked it off prematurely and went out riding or did whatever they had played football, whatever they had. And no woman has ever soaked the cast off.

1:03:50 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Whatever you need the arm for.

1:03:51 Adam That's right. John?

1:03:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Free it.

1:03:53 Caller All right. Basically, I have good sex with my fiance. We're getting married in about a month and a half.

1:04:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thanks for calling. So nice to hear from you.

1:04:04 Adam Really a breath of fresh air, John. Thank you. That's great.

1:04:07 Caller No, but the problem is...

1:04:07 Caller Oh, Tim.

1:04:09 Caller Oh, Tim.

1:04:10 Caller I know. I'm sorry. When I'm actually, she says she can feel it inside and she says there's like chemical change, some things she says it doesn't burn, but she says it feels different and weird. So she talked to a doctor about it. The doctor's like, maybe it's just body chemistry. But I'm sort of like, OK, it makes her uncomfortable. So where does that leave me? What's going on?

1:04:31 Adam I see.

1:04:31 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It leaves you dirtying the sheets if you're going to be.

1:04:34 Drew It sounds sort of almost behavioral, psychological with her.

1:04:37 Adam It does?

1:04:39 Drew It doesn't burn, it doesn't hurt. It just feels weird.

1:04:41 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You know, weird chemical.

1:04:42 Caller No, she says it does burn. It feels uncomfortable.

1:04:45 Drew And it burns on the outside as well as on the inside?

1:04:47 Caller Inside.

1:04:48 Drew It burns.

1:04:49 Caller After I've ejaculated. So it's not when we're having sex or anything like that.

1:04:53 Drew And she had a careful pelvic exam, that sort of thing.

1:04:55 Caller I presume she has, yeah. But I haven't talked to her doctor about it, obviously.

1:04:58 Adam We do get this call once in a while. And once in a while, couples don't match up that way.

1:05:03 Drew Chemistry.

1:05:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones How about his diet? Yeah, I suppose. Heavy, acidic, I don't know. Orange juice, Drew, what do you say?

1:05:10 Adam Eat a lot of mangoes.

1:05:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Is that what it is? Zinc? Too much zinc.

1:05:14 Drew Not like it would affect much.

1:05:16 Caller No problems if we use a condom.

1:05:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, well, of course.

1:05:18 Drew You wonder if she's allergic.

1:05:19 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I wonder why.

1:05:20 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Keeping your chemicals to yourself there.

1:05:22 Adam Can you pull out and have a little hazmat spill on the belly? Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss I can bear that. I don't know. Talk to the doctor, see what's up.

1:05:48 Drew But nothing specific comes to mind for me at all.

1:05:50 Adam Drew, what if they diluted it? What about after the orgasm, he put a shot of seltzer in it?

1:05:56 Drew Yeah, just lean the thing back.

1:05:57 Adam Yeah, those good bottles. Yeah, the old seltzer bottles with the dispenser on them.

1:06:02 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The kind you squirt down the pants.

1:06:04 Caller Yeah.

1:06:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Old.

1:06:06 Adam Yeah, that's something.

1:06:07 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Comedy seltzer. What happened to the seltzer?

1:06:08 Adam Missing that from TV too. Not necessarily 60s, 70s, but just in general, the seltzer bottle is something that's missing. Yeah. All right, we're going to take ourselves a little bitty break. We got the Bosstones here tonight. We'll be right back after this.

1:06:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yo, Loveline will be right back.

1:07:06 Caller Hello, this is the Mango, from the Saturday Night to the Live. And you will be listening to the Loveline with the Adam Corolla sauce and the Drew Man with the ass. No, you can't have a man.

1:07:19 Caller No mango for you.

1:07:22 Adam I guess that's because I brought up the Mango. All right, it is the Loveline program, the radio program. I'm Adam Corolla, it's Dr. Drew over there. Pay attention, it's the name of the Mighty Mighty Bosstones new CD and really here's I know I say this on occasion but I really really mean it this time here's the deal, kiddies, the Mighty Mighty Bosstones are as good a friend of the show as any band ever was and we really like these guys and we want everyone we like to be tremendously successful so they can possibly help us one day when the wheels come off the wagon which I'm feeling is right around the corner so I would like all of you and not only for me and Loveline and Humanity but for you because the Bosstones put out a kick-ass CD each and every time to go out and purchase the new Mighty Mighty Bosstones CD. Do it for me, do it for you, do it for America, do it for Dicky, do it for his condo in Boston. All right, we will, because I got In-N-Out Burger here that I gotta eat, we will hear something else off of the new CD entitled The Pay Attention. And this song is called Where You Come From. There it is. Off of Pay Attention to New Bosstones.

1:11:28 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones You know, they're all good songs.

1:11:29 Adam I know they are.

1:11:30 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones 16 good songs, unless you're in Australia, then there's 18 from what I understand.

1:11:34 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Really? Yeah. How did that work out?

1:11:36 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Well, we're trying to help Australia's economy. Somehow the Bosstones are going to fix everything.

1:11:42 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones So the imports won't be so readily, people won't want to import as much.

1:11:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It seems like a sham to me.

1:11:52 Adam Is that why you do a different import?

1:11:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones For a lot of people, it is, because by the time, I don't know, the record comes out, the American version has already flooded the marketplace and then the, you know.

1:12:03 Adam Does it come out at a different time in Australia?

1:12:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones No, but I don't know.

1:12:07 Caller All right.

1:12:09 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones They're actually competing with American releases for some reason. Can't straighten this out. The answer to that is more songs from the Bosstones.

1:12:17 Caller Paul?

1:12:19 Caller Yeah, hi.

1:12:19 Adam You're 18.

1:12:20 Caller What's up?

1:12:22 Caller I'm having a little problem. I have a few girlfriends. I feel really irritable when I don't have sex, you know, three times a day or two times a day. I was wondering if there's any kind of medication that I can take to deal with that. I haven't been to see a doctor or anything.

1:12:41 Adam There's a homeopathic medicine called jack you off.

1:12:47 Caller I don't need that.

1:12:48 Adam You apply it to your penis once or twice a day. It takes the edge off. They use it in prisons a lot.

1:12:53 Caller That's sad.

1:12:56 Adam Yeah, any lubricant will work. Yeah?

1:13:00 Drew Butter. Paul, I'm going to try to understand. How many girlfriends do you have right now?

1:13:05 Caller Well, I technically only have one, but like three or four.

1:13:11 Adam You're having sex with three or four women?

1:13:13 Caller Yeah, I get really irritable if I don't have sex at least three times a day.

1:13:18 Drew If you're truly a sexual compulsive...

1:13:20 Caller It's getting in the way of my school and everything. If there's any kind of medication...

1:13:25 Drew No, no. If you're truly a sexual... No. If you're truly a sexual... Listen.

1:13:29 Adam My girlfriend... Hey, shut up, you retard, before I come over there and hump you. Jesus Christ. Let Drew talk, you jackass. Why you bother calling the show? Thank you. Go ahead, Drew.

1:13:41 Drew If you're really a sexual compulsive, we'd expect to see a history of you having been sexually abused as a child. Is that there?

1:13:48 Caller No, no.

1:13:49 Drew Is there any addiction? Are you an addict?

1:13:52 Caller Well, I don't know. I'm not a... No, I smoke pot and... No, I don't do anything.

1:13:58 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah, let him again.

1:13:59 Drew Is there any addiction in your family? Alcoholism?

1:14:02 Caller Yeah, alcoholism, yeah.

1:14:03 Drew Alright, so this could be part of that. Addicts, alcoholics sometimes get real compulsive about their sexuality. And if you want to do something about it, it's about... really about going to SA. No magic pills for this. And I'm hoping he's not abusing steroids or something.

1:14:16 Adam Alright, listen, don't get any of these women pregnant. Go to SA. And also, if you get really busy in your life, don't you tend not to obsess about things? I mean, think you guys, and I know if he's a true compulsive or addict, that's something else. But think about times in your life when you've had some downtime. Think about women for a second, guys. You know what I'm talking about? You had a lot of time in your life to think about someone you were with or someone you broke up with or someone you're getting together with. When you had a lot of downtime, you had a lot of time to think about them. And when you're running around and traveling around and taking care of business, you tended to think a little more about taking care of business than you did about that. And maybe it sounds too easy because it doesn't involve a pill or any therapy, but sort of get off your ass and get busy. And this is going to take some of it away. A hobby. Yeah. Is it, besides raping, is it like 85 degrees in here?

1:15:11 Drew Yeah.

1:15:12 Adam Really super hot?

1:15:13 Drew Like hard to breathe even.

1:15:14 Adam Yeah.

1:15:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones How come? It's all right.

1:15:16 Adam Oh. Anne, you cold in there? Honey, get a shawl. We got to kick the air on in here.

1:15:21 Drew There's no oxygen.

1:15:22 Adam It's really hot in here.

1:15:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's getting a little gamey, all right?

1:15:24 Adam Yeah. Really hot. I know. Anne gives us this, you're making it up look. Look at Anne. Anne's like, oh, come on. Don't give us the old you're frying in the studio line again. It's like, you're right, we're gaslighting you, Anne. It's freezing in here.

1:15:39 Drew And as?

1:15:40 Adam And as. You're 25.

1:15:42 Caller Hi.

1:15:43 Adam What's up?

1:15:44 Caller I'm just wondering, I've got some questions about ecstasy and how it affects you physically and mentally.

1:15:50 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Doesn't rock on. Next caller.

1:15:53 Caller Oh.

1:15:53 Adam Joe's right.

1:15:54 Drew National Institute on Drug and Alcohol Abuse is going to come out with a big campaign in the summer that shows PET scans of people after using ecstasy. And it shows the damaging effects, which is really profoundly, profoundly damaging.

1:16:08 Caller I've heard like off the internet, like, stuff, the information that I've downloaded. I was doing it a lot last summer and I've kind of cooled off. But...

1:16:15 Drew Well, you can expect memory problems, anxiety, and depression.

1:16:19 Adam All right, and as...

1:16:19 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What kind of scans are those, Drew?

1:16:21 Drew PET scans.

1:16:22 Caller PET scans?

1:16:23 Drew Yeah, check out the National Institute of Health, NIH.gov or.org.

1:16:28 Caller How do you think it affects your relationships with other people?

1:16:31 Drew Well, if you're depressed and irritable and having difficulty, sort of feeling overwhelmed all the time, it's difficult to engage in relationships.

1:16:37 Caller I don't feel like that.

1:16:38 Drew How do you feel?

1:16:40 Caller Well, I don't really feel like anything, but I had a long relationship that ended once we started experimenting with rolling and stuff like that.

1:16:47 Adam What's rolling?

1:16:49 Caller I'm sorry.

1:16:49 Adam Did you say rolling?

1:16:51 Caller Yeah, you know, sling.

1:16:53 Adam For what?

1:16:54 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Taking acts.

1:16:55 Adam Is that taking acts?

1:16:56 Caller Yeah.

1:16:57 Adam Is that called rolling?

1:16:58 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Whole lifestyle, you know.

1:16:59 Caller Yeah, it is a whole lifestyle.

1:17:01 Adam Well, what, you like swinging with other couples?

1:17:04 Caller Um, no.

1:17:05 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Raving at them, you know, the whole, you know, the whole years of the dancing. I'm not.

1:17:09 Adam I didn't know what rolling was.

1:17:11 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I don't know either, I'm just guessing.

1:17:13 Caller Why?

1:17:13 Adam You talking about that REO. Speedwagon song?

1:17:15 Drew Wait, what is rolling? What is rolling?

1:17:19 Caller Rolling on the river?

1:17:20 Drew And that's what is it?

1:17:21 Caller It's like, it's taking ecstasy, like what you would say if you were trippin.

1:17:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, trippin, good. Oh, something, a word for my day, okay.

1:17:29 Adam Yeah, because Dicky sold out. He lost his edge, I don't know if you heard.

1:17:34 Drew What do people use slang for GHB these days? G?

1:17:37 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What is GHB?

1:17:38 Drew Okay.

1:17:39 Adam Oh, Dicky, yeah, man. You are so high up on your ivory tower, man. You don't know what's going on anymore.

1:17:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I know, really. I'm trying to touch down. Please, write it down.

1:17:49 Caller You can't even see the ground.

1:17:50 Caller G-B-H?

1:17:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Oh, punk rock.

1:17:54 Adam GHB, gamma hydroxybutyrate or something. What is that, Drew?

1:17:59 Drew That's it.

1:18:00 Adam How do you say it, though? I screwed that up.

1:18:01 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones And it's a drug.

1:18:02 Adam Gamma?

1:18:03 Drew Hydroxybutyrate.

1:18:04 Adam There you go. Chai. Wait a minute. Did we talk to this Chi or something? Didn't we talk to someone who had this name before?

1:18:12 Caller Chai, Chi? Chai.

1:18:13 Adam Chai. Hi, Chai.

1:18:15 Caller Hi.

1:18:15 Adam You're 15.

1:18:16 Caller Yeah.

1:18:16 Adam Yeah. When did we talk to you? A couple of weeks ago?

1:18:19 Caller No.

1:18:19 Adam Did we ever talk to you before? Never?

1:18:22 Caller No.

1:18:22 Adam Wow. Someone else with that same name called in. Right, Drew? A few weeks back? Thank you, Drew. It's good radio when I talk to you.

1:18:29 Drew It's good to talk when I'm talking to Dicky.

1:18:31 Adam Sorry for breaking up here. You're a little lovin over there. Anyway, what's your problem, Chai?

1:18:37 Caller Well, I sleep around a lot and I was just like, I don't like how they treat me afterwards, you know, but I don't like stop doing it or anything.

1:18:48 Adam Well, 50 bucks is 50 bucks. Yeah, how many guys have you been with?

1:18:53 Caller Well, six.

1:18:54 Drew What is it you're looking for in these guys?

1:18:56 Caller I don't know.

1:18:57 Drew What to do with them?

1:18:58 Adam Six and what period of time?

1:19:02 Caller Three months, about.

1:19:03 Adam Yeah, that's pretty good for a 15-year-old. How old are these guys?

1:19:09 Caller 16, 17, 20, you know.

1:19:11 Adam Yeah. And where's your dad?

1:19:17 Caller Well, my parents are divorced and we're not. He doesn't have any visitation right now.

1:19:22 Adam I see. Why not?

1:19:23 Caller Well, we were going to visit him for a while. We've been divorced for almost two years and then a few months back, like last month, actually, yeah. He beat up my mom after dropping us off.

1:19:39 Caller That's nice.

1:19:41 Adam Yeah. So your dad's kind of a major a-hole, right? Yeah. All right. So now you're doing a little acting out.

1:19:47 Caller Well, before that too, but yeah.

1:19:49 Adam Yeah. I mean, your dad, that wasn't what did it because that was just a little bit ago, but you grew up with a guy.

1:19:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones He's always been an a-hole.

1:19:56 Adam The guy was a colossal a-hole.

1:19:58 Drew Dad is an a-hole, yeah.

1:19:58 Caller Exactly.

1:19:59 Caller Alcoholic?

1:20:00 Caller Yeah.

1:20:01 Adam All right. So now you're doing what every little girl who has an alcoholic abuse of dad ends up doing, which is you turn into guys and you're acting out. So would you like to stop?

1:20:12 Caller I don't know. I don't know.

1:20:16 Adam Well, then keep going. We'll see you in hell.

1:20:21 Caller Thanks.

1:20:22 Adam Well, what do you want me to say? I'm telling you why you're doing it. You want to stop or you just want to keep doing it?

1:20:28 Caller They always treat me like...

1:20:29 Adam Of course they are because you chose these guys and they're all going to be pricks. Because you chose them.

1:20:35 Drew You're not going to find a guy that conforms to what you want him to be. It's never going to happen. Not the way you're doing it.

1:20:41 Adam Not you, by the way, either. Not right now.

1:20:44 Drew Not the way you pick them. Not right now.

1:20:47 Adam Right.

1:20:47 Drew What you're picking is guys that are colossal assholes like your dad.

1:20:51 Adam And don't start with that all-guys-are-pricks rap because it's not all guys. It's the guys you choose. And that's not your fault. It's your dad's fault. It really is. But it's your fault for not stopping from this conversation on because now you know.

1:21:07 Drew And doing something about it. Maybe getting to talk to a counselor at school. Getting some kind of treatment.

1:21:11 Caller I talked to the counselor. I haven't seen him for like a year.

1:21:14 Drew Sexually? Does he know what you're doing?

1:21:17 Caller Yeah.

1:21:18 Adam Okay. Is he telling you to stop?

1:21:21 Caller Well, I don't know.

1:21:22 Adam Well, can you listen to him, please?

1:21:25 Caller Well, he doesn't really tell me to do anything.

1:21:27 Adam All right. But here's the thing, Chy. Really, here's why I'm trying to intervene here. Because on a few different levels, this is bad. A, you can get pregnant. You know, you can get AIDS. You can get herpes. You can get some sort of venereal disease that can't be cured or even one that can be cured. And there's a pain in the ass. You can do damage to yourself physically. But emotionally, you do damage to yourself. Because here's what happens. As a female, oh, God, I wish I had the ability to act out sexually when I was 15. I had all the makings of a slut when I was 15 and I never got laid. I was like 18. You know what I'm saying? And I don't blame you. I mean, if I could have done it, if I was going to act out, I would have done it too. And you have to govern yourself because guys are not going to govern you themselves. They're going to be on you. But here's what I'm saying, Chy. You're 15. You can't understand this right now. But we hear it time and time again. You come from this kind of environment. You go nuts from 15 to 17. You rack up a whole bunch of numbers. You sleep with 30 guys in a year and a half. You feel as if you've lost some of your innocence and you've given something away. And then lo and behold, you're like 24 and you meet the man in your dreams. And it kind of haunts you. You feel bad for your past. You feel bad for the way you've acted. It doesn't mean he's not going to love you. You end up screwing with yourself over just a small period of time in your life when you didn't stop yourself, question what you were doing and get some help. So you're at that threshold now. You already got started down the path. We're asking you to stop.

1:23:01 Drew Do something.

1:23:02 Adam All right?

1:23:03 Caller Okay.

1:23:04 Adam Or don't. We're just telling you. But I know what the outcome is if you don't. All right?

1:23:10 Caller I have a lot of trouble getting close to anybody.

1:23:13 Adam I know.

1:23:14 Drew They've all been painful. It's been painful to be involved with people.

1:23:17 Adam Stop trying if you're having trouble. Just lay back and be 15 for Christ's sake. I know you need a lot. I know you need something from guys because of what your dad did. But you can't find that in every guy. You got to find that in yourself. You need to read a book and go for a walk or even read the book while you're walking. But don't hit a tree. All right?

1:23:36 Caller Okay.

1:23:37 Adam All right.

1:23:38 Caller You're not going to do it.

1:23:39 Adam But what I can't, you know what I mean? If you had that opportunity, I mean, given, my parents didn't pay that much attention to me. My dad wasn't around that much. I would have gladly done this at 15 if I could have.

1:23:53 Drew Been a slut.

1:23:54 Adam Acted out.

1:23:55 Drew Of course.

1:23:55 Adam Yeah.

1:23:56 Drew Because you're a male.

1:23:57 Adam Yeah. I mean, I needed an ether bottle and a roll of duct tape in order to pull this off. And like four willing guys who wouldn't talk in a van. And I saw enough shotgun.

1:24:08 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Sounds like you had the guys.

1:24:09 Adam Yeah. I had a crew.

1:24:11 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

1:24:11 Adam The Erection crew.

1:24:12 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

1:24:13 Adam I've seen your Erection crew.

1:24:14 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The Johnson boys.

1:24:15 Adam The Johnson gang.

1:24:16 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The Johnson gang.

1:24:18 Caller The old hole in the wall gang.

1:24:20 Adam Yeah. Oh, we used that hole in the wall too.

1:24:22 Drew We're going to go into a rector set.

1:24:24 Adam All right. We'll take ourselves a little break. We'll be back with the Bosstones after this.

1:24:28 Caller Back once again with the Loveline.

1:24:30 Drew Loveline. The band Corolla and Dr. Drew will be right back before you know it.

1:25:05 Adam It's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Mighty Mighty Bosstones here tonight. Yeah, I'm just looking at the CD.

1:25:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I signed that one for him.

1:25:16 Adam Oh, you did? All right, well, this is Drew's. Pay Attention is the name of the CD. It is out, and we suggest you go out and get it if you haven't already. Jeremy.

1:25:26 Caller Yeah.

1:25:26 Adam You're 16, what's up?

1:25:28 Caller Yeah, how's it going, guys? Good. Good. Adam, you're a genius man, and Dr. Drew, you rock, man.

1:25:33 Drew All right, Jeremy, what's going on?

1:25:35 Caller Well, like this night, I was playing soccer for my team, and I got need, like right in the balls, and...

1:25:43 Drew There's another case of the soccer player not wearing a cup.

1:25:46 Adam Are you not wearing a cup when you play soccer?

1:25:48 Caller No, no way.

1:25:50 Adam What is that?

1:25:51 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Free balling it, huh?

1:25:52 Caller It's like...

1:25:53 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I wear a cup if I watch soccer.

1:25:56 Caller It's like a professional boxer wearing headgear. I mean, it's just really stupid, man.

1:26:01 Drew Is it really stupid?

1:26:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I don't see the comparison.

1:26:04 Adam Listen, it's illegal for a professional boxer to wear headgear, but if you gave him the option to wear headgear, he would put it on gladly.

1:26:11 Drew Yeah?

1:26:12 Adam Yeah.

1:26:13 Caller Well, there's something to consider. Maybe I'm definitely wearing a cup from now on, man.

1:26:18 Adam Yeah, I have two cups, a day cup and a sleeping cup. I'm not protective of my genitalia.

1:26:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones What size cup you got?

1:26:26 Drew And a smoking cup.

1:26:27 Adam Well, I buy a medium, but a small would work. I, you know, in case there's an earthquake at night, I want a lighting fixture landing on my groin.

1:26:38 Drew Yeah.

1:26:38 Adam By the way, speaking of comedy, what happened to chandeliers landing on guys' heads? There's like a lot of chandeliers.

1:26:45 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Not even the chandelier, what about the anvil out of nowhere?

1:26:48 Drew Anvil.

1:26:49 Adam Piano.

1:26:49 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Down the street.

1:26:50 Adam Yeah. No one hoists them up with the block and tackle anymore out to the eighth story of their Brooklyn brownstone, you know?

1:26:58 Drew Jeremy?

1:26:59 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones So what's the story?

1:26:59 Drew What happened? You got in need?

1:27:02 Caller Yeah. And like, you know, ever since, and it's just been really swollen. And I usually, you know, whack off before I go to bed. And I just wasn't able to do it.

1:27:12 Drew How long ago this happened?

1:27:13 Caller It was this night, last night.

1:27:15 Drew Why didn't you go see a doctor?

1:27:20 Caller I don't know. All right.

1:27:21 Drew Well, you could, you can fracture the test. You can, you can rupture, rupture, fracture, you can cut the blood supply off to it. It can die.

1:27:30 Caller My God.

1:27:30 Drew You can be really serious. You got to get it checked out. And when they swell and you get painful erections and that kind of thing, that's a significant symptom and it needs to be checked out.

1:27:40 Adam And by the way, if you're playing soccer, you're playing any sport where they're kicking involved, put the cup on, and the excuse that it is going to impede your mobility is ridiculous because professional football players have been wearing cups for years and...

1:27:56 Drew Fastest guys in sports.

1:27:57 Adam Yeah, right. Tony Dorsett put a cup in and was able to make his 100-yard scampers without any difficulty.

1:28:06 Drew No chafing.

1:28:06 Adam You know, could have been some possible chafing, but it didn't slow his moves down at all.

1:28:11 Drew I had a patient who got a hockey puck direct hit.

1:28:14 Adam In the nuts. In the seeds.

1:28:16 Drew Fractured.

1:28:17 Adam Really?

1:28:17 Drew Split it right in half. Like a hard-boiled egg.

1:28:21 Adam The scary part is he was playing tennis. That is the most frightening part of this story.

1:28:26 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It could happen anytime.

1:28:27 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Sure.

1:28:28 Adam Little help, you're lying on the ground.

1:28:31 Caller Help over here.

1:28:33 Adam You need help, I need help.

1:28:33 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones A little street hockey going over here.

1:28:35 Adam Plus my nuts like a three-minute egg. Come on. Jesus, what happened, Drew?

1:28:40 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Don't they have pads in those hockey pants?

1:28:42 Adam Get it checked out. Wasn't he wearing a cup?

1:28:44 Drew No.

1:28:45 Adam No? Playing ice hockey?

1:28:46 Drew Oh, yes, he was. I take it back, he was through the cup.

1:28:49 Adam Broke the cup right in half?

1:28:51 Drew Yeah.

1:28:51 Adam I'd say I would have a cup.

1:28:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones A shard of the cup material still in him.

1:28:56 Adam Really?

1:28:56 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Those pucks are hard.

1:28:57 Drew Direct hit.

1:28:58 Adam Yeah. I know, it always amazed me whenever I turn on ESPN2 and I'm watching hockey from the 60s, goalie, no mask.

1:29:06 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

1:29:07 Adam What the hell kind of thinking is going on with that?

1:29:11 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I think Jerry Cheever is in the Boston Bruins or the first goalie mask.

1:29:15 Adam Yeah. Smart Jerry they call him.

1:29:18 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's Boston, very smart people.

1:29:19 Adam Jerry the Brain Cheever, I think his name was.

1:29:22 Caller Josh?

1:29:25 Adam You're 27, what's up?

1:29:26 Caller Yeah. I have a question for Dr. Drew. Yeah. I've had this problem for a long time, like, that I caught scabies from this dude's snake a long time ago, a big python, I think it might have gotten under my skin or something.

1:29:43 Drew Wait a minute, scabies you get from other people.

1:29:45 Caller Well, maybe it was that, because I don't know, but the doctors, anyway, but the doctors.

1:29:50 Adam That is a serious white trash maneuver, by the way. I picked up something from a snake. You know what I mean?

1:29:55 Drew Not something lice.

1:29:57 Caller Well, I had gotten scabies and I had gotten it taken care of, or I thought I did, and then I went back and they were like, okay, well, here's some shampoo, here, wash yourself, this and that. So I did. And then I still don't think that it's gone in a way because...

1:30:12 Drew Did you do all the household things you're supposed to do?

1:30:15 Caller Huh?

1:30:15 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Like throw away the snake and all that stuff.

1:30:18 Drew Vacuuming and...

1:30:19 Caller My snake. That was a long, long time ago.

1:30:21 Drew Did you do all the household stuff you're supposed to do?

1:30:23 Caller What do you mean?

1:30:24 Adam Around the trailer.

1:30:25 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:30:26 Caller I think that's probably one of the things I didn't do.

1:30:29 Adam Take everything.

1:30:29 Drew One of the things, yes. What else didn't you do?

1:30:31 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Burn the overalls.

1:30:32 Adam The potato sack you wear with the arm holes in it. You gotta wash that. The rope used for belts. You gotta wash that.

1:30:40 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones The sleeveless half shirt. Wash that in gasoline.

1:30:42 Drew Anybody else in the household think they have a rash or scabies?

1:30:45 Caller Well, yeah. Actually, my girlfriend.

1:30:47 Drew All right. Well, if she doesn't get treated...

1:30:48 Caller The real problem, though, the thing... I just had sex with her like a couple of days ago. And I think that possibly, because I'm like... None of it is personal in her thing, but I'm like uncircumcised. And just the other day we had sex and like... I'm like... I don't know. My skin is like... kind of like peeling and stuff in there.

1:31:09 Caller It's like a python.

1:31:10 Drew But if she has scabies and is not getting treated, that's where you're getting it.

1:31:13 Adam What is the difference between scabies and cramps?

1:31:17 Drew That's pubic lice. This is a different kind of a mite that gets under the skin of burros.

1:31:23 Adam I'll kill myself.

1:31:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Can you get it from the snake?

1:31:26 Drew I've never heard of it before. You get itching. The classic thing is a little sort of streak. A streak where the mite burrows through your skin because it makes a little red streak. But any itching, any eruption that's sort of around the belt line, ankles, wrists, distributes like that, that's scabies will prove otherwise.

1:31:43 Adam Allison.

1:31:45 Caller You got a word? Allison?

1:31:46 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Hello?

1:31:47 Adam Your friend always tries to make out with the guys you like?

1:31:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Not quite like that. I have a friend of mine and we're pretty close, you know. But it seems like every guy that I let her know that I have a crush on or anything.

1:32:02 Caller She tries to make out with them?

1:32:04 Caller Huh? Yeah.

1:32:05 Caller She suddenly just becomes like overly sexual around them and like hangs on them.

1:32:11 Drew Tries to make out with them?

1:32:12 Caller Huh?

1:32:13 Adam Tries to make out with them?

1:32:14 Caller Yeah.

1:32:14 Adam Yeah. All right. I'm sorry. I was way off. Hey, numbnuts. I'm not answering your question now because you repeated verbatim what I said to you that you said wasn't.

1:32:27 Caller All right?

1:32:28 Adam All right. Sorry. I have to make an example of you. Okay?

1:32:32 Caller All right.

1:32:32 Adam Sorry. I will not tolerate that. I don't know what it is with a 16-year-old to insist on doing that.

1:32:40 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I don't think you understood the question. She was trying to ask you about a friend who likes to make out with the guy she likes.

1:32:47 Adam Oh, is that true?

1:32:48 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

1:32:49 Adam Oh, I thought it was a friend who likes to make out with the guy she likes.

1:32:52 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Yeah.

1:32:53 Adam I didn't know that. In that case, my apologies.

1:32:55 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones I don't think you were fair to her.

1:32:57 Adam You're right. We weren't.

1:32:58 Drew The guy that she likes, the girlfriend wants to make out with and be sexual with.

1:33:02 Adam I see. I was confused about that. Yeah.

1:33:03 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones It's the friend. She wasn't making out with anyone.

1:33:06 Adam I see. It was the friend. We'll be back for a full apology after this.

1:33:16 Caller Love Line will be right back.

1:33:49 Adam All righty. Well, there you go. Another fabulous show with the Mighty Mighty Bosstones in the can. I want to thank Dick and Joe for coming down here. Always, always a delight. Tomorrow night at the Roxy, everybody, if you're out here in LA on Sunset Strip, do not miss the totally free show at the Roxy. Get there early. Get to the box office. Get those tickets. See the Bosstones. Pay attention is the name of the CD. Go out and get it. I command you to get it. And catch them also tomorrow night on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Thanks, guys.

1:34:23 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thank you, Adam.

1:34:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thanks, Adam.

1:34:24 The Mighty Mighty Bosstones Thanks, Drew.

1:34:25 Adam And until next time. Yeah, thanks, Drew. Until next time. Is that an umbrella for Dr. Drew? Say mahalo. Hey, shut up, you retard, before I come over there and hump you. Well now.

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Wednesday, May 24, 2000