Episode 1000754887148

4:34 UBC Seattle.

4:50 Voiceover Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, coast to coast.

4:56 Adam Hey, it's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number 310-8-5-4-44-55. Dr. Drew's a board certified physician and addiction medicine specialist.

5:11 Drew And you were recovering from Monday Night Football?

5:14 Adam Oh, big Rams loss. Oh my God. Oh. I'm a Rams fan and I just had the Rams and they'd won. Yeah. They'd won. It was over. You know what I yell every time? Dr. Drew, I can't talk to you about sports. I can't talk to you about anything. You can. You can.

5:31 Drew You can talk about sports a little bit.

5:32 Adam You know what there used to be? There used to be something called the coffin corner. When the punter punted in tight.

5:40 Drew Yeah.

5:40 Adam He'd try to go for the corner, try to pin him down.

5:43 Drew Right.

5:44 Adam They don't dough for that corner anymore.

5:45 Drew No, they don't.

5:46 Adam The coffin corner. They try to float it up and land it on the five-yard line.

5:50 Drew Right.

5:50 Adam Doesn't work. It does not work. Let me tell you.

5:53 Drew Something popped in the end zone.

5:54 Adam I just want that coffin corner back. I've been yelling about it for years. Very popular when we used to watch ball back in the day, the coffin corner. All right. You know, it was weird. I was thinking earlier today, geez, I kind of miss work. I'm glad to be going back. And then I was driving in the night. I was thinking, oh, Christ, I got to go to work the same day.

6:14 Drew Yeah.

6:16 Adam Well, should we get going?

6:18 Drew Yeah. I had my flu shot today. I'm whacked out because of that.

6:21 Adam Why do you have? Do you have as a doctor, do you have to have a flu shot?

6:24 Drew I don't have to, but I should. I deal with so many sick people.

6:27 Adam Most doctors have a flu shot.

6:29 Drew Most.

6:30 Adam Yeah.

6:30 Drew After the age of about yesterday, at the age of 45 or so they would. But most do. I think this year is a huge shortage. It has been hell to get the vaccine. I finally got my hand on 100 doses. I had to buy it off a distributor. You couldn't get it off a...

6:45 Adam Black guy wearing a fedora hat and a big feather hanging out of it in the park. Yeah.

6:50 Drew It's bizarre. It's been such a bizarre year.

6:52 Adam Why? Why is it hard to get the flu vaccination?

6:54 Drew I'll be honest. They're not being clear about it. It kind of scares me the way it's gone. Yeah. It's been very weird.

6:59 Adam And what do you get? Who decides which flu it's going to be every year?

7:03 Drew There are ways of deciding. There are models that take into account how the virus changes year to year.

7:09 Adam They know it was funny. We were going to go right to the calls. I'm now going to spend the first hour of the show trying to figure out the flu vaccine. OK, let me just let me get this straight. Well, we have a lot of 14 year olds who are interested in how the flu vaccine works.

7:23 Drew Of course.

7:24 Adam Yeah. First off, there are many different flus, right?

7:28 Drew Yeah.

7:28 Adam That's a virus.

7:29 Drew Well, yes.

7:30 Adam Is a flu a virus?

7:31 Drew Yes.

7:31 Adam And there's many different strains.

7:33 Drew Many viruses.

7:33 Adam But each year, there seems to be a predominant one.

7:36 Drew They can predict about 80 percent of what's going to happen in a year.

7:40 Adam How does that work? And why does it change every year?

7:42 Drew Because viruses, in order to survive, they morph. Yeah, they morph.

7:46 Adam So has it ever been the same from, is it possible that we get the same one this year as they got 20 years ago? Or is it just always different?

7:54 Drew No, it's different, but I'm sure things cycle around a bit.

7:57 Adam And whose job is it? Is it the Center for Disease Control? Who figure out, and when, by the way, do they figure that out, which one it's going to be this year?

8:07 Drew I'm sure they already know what next year's going to look like.

8:09 Adam Oh, they do.

8:09 Drew Models for that, you know.

8:11 Adam They figure that out.

8:11 Drew I'm sure they factor in whatever does in fact happen this year as helping refine what happens next year.

8:17 Adam And they then make it how far in advance?

8:21 Drew That year.

8:22 Adam They make it that year.

8:23 Drew Yeah, now allegedly something went wrong in the quote manufacturing. And yet when you ask what went wrong, everybody says, well, it's very vague.

8:31 Adam Who manufactures it? A drug company? Is it paid for?

8:36 Drew But presumed, I don't know who manufactures it, but it's distributed through various drug companies.

8:40 Adam I see. And it comes in a liquid form.

8:43 Drew Comes in liquid, 10 doses a mile.

8:45 Adam Why does it have to be shot in? Is there any way, can they figure out a way to ingest this orally and have it work?

8:51 Drew I bet they'll have one that you can spread in your nose eventually.

8:54 Adam I see. And, all right, so, and then it gets spread out, and then people who are in the health care field should take it. People are dealing with people who are sick.

9:04 Drew People with chronic illness, people over the age of 65, people deal with the public a lot, trying to deal with just people in high-risk categories.

9:12 Adam Yeah, but you, even though you're not one, you insisted that you get first in line for the shot.

9:17 Drew The physicians were taking it this year, and I thought...

9:19 Adam Well, high-risk, you get the flu, it's not gonna kill you.

9:22 Drew No.

9:22 Adam My grandma gets the flu, she's going down.

9:24 Drew Potentially.

9:24 Adam All right, well, she won't get her shot this year because Drew didn't want to miss his Maui golf vacation. Fantastic. That's them calling from my grandmother's house.

9:36 Drew I wouldn't be there for the other patients that need...

9:38 Adam I see, you want to help the other people, I understand. All right, so you got your flu shot, and what's it do? Does it make you feel flu-y for a little while? It does?

9:48 Drew I think I have some sort of impaired viral immunity. I really do. I get everything. In our house right now, there's all the sickness. The kids are all sick with stuff. So I'm either getting mad or I'm reacting to the flu. It's just ridiculous.

10:00 Adam I don't seem to get too much.

10:01 Drew You know how often I get sick.

10:02 Adam Yeah, you do. Very sick. Very weak. Very feeble.

10:06 Drew But passionate.

10:07 Adam But passionate. A very, very passionate man.

10:10 Drew We're talking about Chris for the half an hour?

10:12 Adam Mary Ann? No. That's my buddy. I made Drew meat last night.

10:15 Drew No, no. You made me feel his arm.

10:17 Adam Oh yeah. Mary Ann?

10:20 Guest Yeah.

10:20 Adam You're 19. What's up?

10:22 Guest Well, yesterday I took the morning after pill. My doctor said that I should start bleeding right away.

10:30 Drew You take the morning after pill or do you take the abortion pill?

10:32 Guest The morning after.

10:33 Drew Which one did you take?

10:34 Guest Morning after.

10:36 Drew Which version of that did you take?

10:37 Guest Plan B.

10:38 Drew Okay. You don't have to bleed with that.

10:41 Guest No.

10:42 Drew No, you don't have to.

10:42 Guest Should I start my period right away?

10:45 Drew Not necessarily. Were you on a pill that you missed or anything like that happen?

10:49 Guest No.

10:49 Drew You were just, you just, unprotected sex, no birth control, right? You hadn't been using anything prior to this?

10:55 Guest Just besides condom, no.

10:57 Drew Yeah.

10:58 Adam All right. She's fine.

10:59 Drew Yeah.

10:59 Adam You're looking good, baby.

11:01 Drew It's variable how it affects people. Sometimes you will bleed afterwards. Sometimes you won't.

11:06 Adam Good times. Enjoy. Eric?

11:08 Yo.

11:09 Adam You're 21.

11:10 Caller Okay.

11:11 Adam Question is, did you get herpes on your nipples?

11:17 Caller I don't know. Well, the thing is, because like they're really itchy and-

11:21 Drew Both of them?

11:22 Caller Well, I started on one and then I just really itching the crap out of it. Yeah. And it just kind of caught on to the other one.

11:30 Adam On the nipple.

11:30 Drew Caught on.

11:31 Caller Well, I guess kind of transferred over.

11:33 Adam You do any surfing?

11:35 Caller Yeah, but I-

11:36 What's wrong with my head with that?

11:38 Caller But I've always surfed but not like I haven't surfed for probably the past month. And it's not because of that usually because I wear a rash guard if I do but-

11:46 Drew Are they hurting? Are they aching or hurting or swelling or anything like that?

11:50 Caller It's like a blister on it. Where? Like around it.

11:56 Drew The whole thing is a blister?

11:58 Caller Not the whole thing really. I don't know if it's a blister but it's like a rash.

12:00 Adam You haven't surfed in a month? What happened? Did you break your leg?

12:04 Caller No.

12:06 Drew Got a job?

12:07 Caller I just haven't. No.

12:08 Adam Well, you're no surfer then.

12:10 Caller Well, it's not because of that.

12:12 Drew You're gay.

12:12 Adam Yeah, no. I'm just saying surfers, they got to surf. It's like heroin. You know how you know surfing is a drug? These guys, you ever see these guys interviewed after they get attacked by a great white shark? Yeah. They're like, well, I know I got attacked by a nineteen foot great white shark and I'm lucky to be alive. They always show the guy's surfboard with the big tooth mark out of it. You know, I'm going back in the water. Yeah.

12:36 Drew I'll put this one up on the wall and.

12:38 Adam Yeah. Now, if I was golfing and got attacked by grizzly bear, that'd be it. That'd be it.

12:44 Drew Yeah.

12:44 Adam If I was fill in the blank, whatever it is, breathing and got it got attacked by a great white shark, that'd be it. Masturbating. Oh, well, in that case.

12:57 Drew Well, it's an addiction. They're the compulsion.

12:58 Adam No, I would just kill myself.

13:00 Drew You could or not surf or not masturbate.

13:03 Adam No.

13:03 Drew That's basically the decision point for a surfer.

13:05 Adam I'm just saying, you know, surfing is more than a hobby, more than a sport. If a guy gets attacked by a great white shark, as soon as they pull the 700 staples out of his abdomen, he's back in the water.

13:18 Drew Well, it seems like most of the interviews too are guys like out on the beach. They call him out of the water for the interview, right?

13:25 Adam You mean, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's like, hey, we want to interview Mark about being attacked by the great white shark.

13:30 Drew In one second, there's a set coming in. Just a second.

13:32 Adam Oh, he's not here. He's surfing. Yeah, that's pretty freaky. You know, it's weird too. They always get that part in. Whenever someone gets attacked by any kind of animal, whether it be a shark or a grizzly bear, they always slide that part in about not blaming the animal, as if the animal's family's watching is going to exact some revenge or be upset over this allegation or there's an attorney for the animal present. They always do that talk where they go, uh, I don't blame the shark. The shark's a wild animal, and uh, you don't think he had a vendetta against the Minstrom family? Wasn't your uncle attacked by a family of sharks some time ago? You don't think it was anyway connected to that? They always make a point to say that the bear did not mean any harm, it was scared of me, it was protecting its cubs, or the shark thought I was a seal. It's always that little sidebar about not blaming the shark. Hey, if I got attacked, if I get tried to be eaten by anything, full blame. Full blame on whoever tried to eat me. Fat chick, shark, don't matter. Full blame. Thank you. All right. So who knows what's going on with his nipples? What should he do? Has he had sex?

14:49 Drew It doesn't really matter. He's got a parietic or itchy rash, right? And herpes can be one of those things, but usually it's not on both sides.

14:54 Adam What about some of that?

14:56 Drew Fungus, could be a lot of different things.

14:59 Caller I don't know what it is. It started off as an itch.

15:01 Drew Yeah, but why go to STD? You look, you got a rash.

15:04 Caller I don't know, I don't know.

15:05 Adam Rub on some of that cortisone cream.

15:06 Drew You can get a corti, but listen, it ought to be looked at. And it certainly can be a herpatic rash. That kind of thing can happen.

15:11 Caller I don't know what to even think about. I just thought it.

15:14 Adam Well, listen, if it was herpes, wouldn't he get the fever and the break out and that kind of thing system, too?

15:19 Drew You usually get a little fluy beforehand, but listen, it's a rash. Just think of it in terms of rash. See a doctor about the rash.

15:25 Adam Why doesn't he try rubbing some of that corti on it first?

15:27 Drew Fine, corti won't hurt, I assume, but the blistering part of something needs to be looked at. Blistering means pretty exuberant reaction.

15:33 Adam I'll tell you, I could only rub so much of that corti cream on my nipples before something starts happening.

15:38 Drew Something starts coming out?

15:39 Adam You know what I mean? I have sensitive nipples.

15:41 Drew I know. I'm very aware of that.

15:42 Adam I might start lengthening. Johnny?

15:45 Drew Yeah?

15:46 Adam You're 19.

15:47 Caller That's right.

15:48 Adam It wasn't the bear's fault. He thought I was a gazelle.

15:55 Caller Yeah, whatever, man.

15:56 Adam All right, Johnny, what's up?

15:58 Caller Basically, a couple nights ago, my girlfriend, she went out of town and her mom was saying, you know, she'd take care of me because I got no place to go.

16:09 Drew Why don't you have any place to go?

16:10 Adam And by the way, it's got no place to go with an S.

16:13 Drew Got no place to go. Why don't you have any place to go?

16:16 Caller Well, a long time ago, basically, I got kicked out of the house, you know.

16:21 Drew So where are you living?

16:22 Caller I'm still living here, actually.

16:24 Drew Where is here?

16:26 Caller At my girlfriend's house.

16:28 Adam I see. So your girlfriend's mom is going to take care of you.

16:32 Caller Yeah.

16:33 Adam Yeah.

16:34 Caller And we got drunk one night and guess we just went out.

16:37 Drew Where did your girlfriend go?

16:39 Caller She went to New York.

16:40 Drew Why?

16:41 Caller Business.

16:43 Drew What kind of business is she in?

16:44 Adam Extradition.

16:45 Caller Pardon me?

16:46 Drew What kind of business is she in?

16:48 Caller Pardon me?

16:49 Drew What kind of business is she in?

16:50 Caller She owns a video store and you know they've tried to open up a store out there. They... What's going on down there?

16:58 Adam I see. Your girlfriend owns a video store.

17:01 Caller That's right.

17:01 Adam She's here in hog heaven. How old is your girlfriend?

17:05 Caller My girlfriend is 22.

17:07 Adam She owns a video store, 22. Yeah.

17:10 Caller Well, she got it from her daddy.

17:11 Adam Now, you're making sense. And so daddy's gone.

17:16 Caller Yeah, daddy's gone.

17:17 Adam Daddy died?

17:20 Caller They don't even talk about that. They don't even tell anybody.

17:23 Drew Do you know what happened?

17:24 Caller No clue. No clue at all.

17:26 Adam Well, if he gave her the video store, either he's in prison or he's dead, right?

17:30 Caller One of the two, I don't know. I don't even ask because she told me never to ask.

17:35 Adam Oh, that's not a great sign, by the way.

17:38 Drew And it kind of fits with the story here. That's mom that married dad.

17:41 Adam Right. So mom's a piece of work, maybe an alcoholic.

17:44 Caller Oh, definitely.

17:45 Adam And you guys got snookered up.

17:49 Caller Yeah, pretty much. Actually, she kind of puts something in my drink.

17:52 Adam What did she slip in her drink? Her Clitoris?

17:55 Caller No.

17:57 Adam What did she put in the drink?

17:58 Caller Actually, I have no idea. I think it was acid because, I don't know, it probably must have been acid because she's a big acid head.

18:05 Drew Oh, boy.

18:07 Adam How do you... Listen, hold on a second.

18:10 Drew She put something in her own drink or in your drink?

18:12 Caller In my drink.

18:13 Adam No, she didn't put anything in your drink.

18:14 Drew What did you experience that makes you think it's acid?

18:17 Caller Aside from the fact that I felt like a normal child is going to do acid, things like that. I don't know. I really can't remember all that much as far as when I was loose.

18:27 Adam How many drinks did you have with her?

18:29 Caller Oh, God, man, at least, I don't know, maybe 25 shots that night.

18:35 Adam Yeah. You don't need any acid when you do 25 shots. That's plenty of booze. That's plenty of stuff for your brain to swim in. All right, so you got loaded and you had sex with her.

18:47 Caller Yeah, pretty much.

18:48 Adam All right, and now what?

18:50 Caller Now I just don't know if I should tell my girl.

18:54 Adam No.

18:55 Caller What should I do?

18:55 Adam No. No. Don't tell her. How about get you love your girl?

19:01 Caller Yeah.

19:02 Adam Yeah, obviously.

19:04 Caller And I'm told that there's not happy about the fact that I even allowed myself to do something like this because I'm not like this.

19:10 Adam I understand. And your girlfriend, she's back from New York City.

19:15 Caller Oh, yeah, she's back.

19:16 Adam I see. And you've and she's been back and no one said anything so far.

19:22 Caller Absolutely not.

19:23 Adam How about you get yourself a nice job?

19:26 And I do have a job, actually.

19:28 Adam Diesel mechanic?

19:31 Caller No, not exactly.

19:32 Adam What do you work on?

19:33 Caller I'm working at a video store.

19:35 Drew Oh, at her video store.

19:37 Caller Yeah.

19:37 Adam Hey, she got porn there?

19:39 Caller Most likely. Yeah, pretty sure we do.

19:42 Adam I'm pretty sure.

19:43 Caller What department do you work in?

19:44 Adam Most likely. And the thing's probably 27 square feet, as big as a walk-in closet. You spend most of your time in that porn section. Who are you kidding? You know the good part about working at a video store, Drew? You get to take home those cardboard cutouts. You know the displays? You could go home and rape Sandra Bullock.

20:07 Drew Right.

20:08 Adam I mean, the cardboard.

20:09 Drew Yes, yes, version.

20:10 Adam Yeah, still good. Still better than anything he's getting. All right. She's got the store. He's working at the store. They need to move out and he needs to shut up.

20:22 Drew Well, they're all living with mom.

20:23 Adam Yeah.

20:24 Drew I thought mom came in to take care of him or something.

20:26 Adam No, he's living with mom, right?

20:28 Drew You live with mom full time?

20:30 Caller Yeah. Yeah. Actually, at the moment I am. We all live in the same house.

20:34 Drew All right.

20:34 Adam You need to move out. You need to move out.

20:36 Caller Need to move out?

20:37 Adam That's right. Don't trip on the sleeping dog that's on the porch as you head out.

20:43 Drew And you can take the Austin Powers cutout with you, but.

20:46 Adam Leave the Sandra Bullock one.

20:48 Drew For mom.

20:48 Caller All right. I think I am going to move out, actually.

20:51 Adam Good man.

20:52 Drew You might even want to move out by yourself and have a head to say.

20:55 Caller I'm not even at home right now. I'm at my boy's house. And, you know, we're just we're just drunk. All right.

21:01 Adam You know, OK, boy. Listen, don't get don't get her pregnant. You know, you get her pregnant, she's going to give birth to a possum.

21:12 Drew This could all be really conceptualized as the result of alcoholism to everybody. Right. Mom's an addict. This guy's an alcoholic, possibly. A little bit of recovery here would go a long way towards improving the situation.

21:27 Adam 25 shots. Yeah, you know, it struck me over the weekend we had the big acoustic Christmas concert and the beer was flowing. I was having a good time. You know, it's taken me, you know, 20 some odd years, but I've learned to drink. You know what I'm saying?

21:46 Drew Learn to pace yourself.

21:47 Adam Learn to keep that buzz going. You know, the whole the whole deal with the buzz, Drew, is there's there's a zone.

21:55 Drew I see a buzz zone.

21:56 Adam The buzz zone.

21:57 Drew Educate me here.

21:57 Adam I'll explain how the buzz zone goes. It's kind of a, it's kind of a margin. And when you're below it, you're not buzzed.

22:06 Drew You're not having fun.

22:07 Adam Right. And when you're above it too far.

22:09 Drew Not fun.

22:10 Adam You're heaving.

22:11 Drew It's also not fun.

22:12 Adam Or, you know, raping or fighting or you're doing something horrible. Right.

22:16 Drew Yeah.

22:17 Adam There's just a little zone. It's like two lines. One is the minimum, one is the maximum. Your job is to be above the minimum, but below the maximum. Do you see? Especially when it's a situation like last weekend where you have stuff to do. You got to announce some bands. You got to walk around. You got to socialize. You're going to see some of the brass there and whatnot. You don't want to make an ass of yourself or vomit on anybody. So the idea is to down a few beers, get up into that buzz zone quick, but here's where the difficult part comes. And here's where my years of training, this is where it's really all paid off. Keeping that buzz alive. Uh-oh, like Saturday night, put down a few too many beers too fast. Now, in the past, what would I have done?

22:59 Drew Keep drinking.

22:59 Adam Keep drinking. Not put down the beer, have a cup of coffee, go get a finger sandwich, have a handful of chips, eat a cookie, have a cup of coffee, a little water.

23:13 Drew A little drag racing out on Ventura Boulevard.

23:15 Adam Mellow. No, no, I'm talking about now.

23:18 Drew Oh, I see.

23:18 Adam I'm talking about now. See, I'm bringing the buzz down.

23:20 Drew Well, I'm talking about now, too.

23:21 Adam How dare you? Now, I bring the buzz down, I mellow out for 45 minutes, then it starts dipping a little below the bottom buzz line, have myself another beer, get back up into that buzz sweet spot there, and try to maintain that.

23:36 Drew Beautiful.

23:37 Adam See what I'm saying?

23:38 Caller I drink to that.

23:39 Drew Hey, I, by the way, thought of a new comeback that should replace, or at least be a corollary to How Dare You, which is I Beg Your Pardon.

23:47 Adam Yeah, I'll see if I can work that in.

23:49 Oh, man, I beg to differ.

23:52 Adam Maureen?

23:54 Hello.

23:54 Adam You're 15.

23:56 Caller Yes, I am.

23:56 Adam What's up?

23:58 Caller Um, I kind of have trouble with, um, intimacy, I guess. I can't really get together with the guys because I guess I act too boyish.

24:13 Drew What does that mean?

24:14 Caller Um, I'm the only girl that's not afraid to go up to a guy and tell me he's an idiot or, or ask him to do something for me or say hello like most girls.

24:28 Drew No, that's not a problem for guys.

24:30 Adam No.

24:30 Drew That's not a problem. In fact, guys prefer that.

24:32 Adam Yeah.

24:32 Drew It makes their job easier.

24:34 Adam That's right.

24:35 Drew So there's something else.

24:36 Adam Yeah, it's really like saying car salesmen are turned off by a customer who comes into the showroom and knows what he wants.

24:45 Drew Right.

24:45 Adam No, it's, they're not turned off by it. It's a faster sale.

24:49 Drew Right. There's something, something else.

24:52 Caller Oh, I guess like I kind of enjoy sports a little too much. No, that's also as there's like a whole bunch of guys, they play football and I go, well, I want to play football too. And they let me, but they really don't like me playing with them because I like football a lot because you're bigger than they are.

25:10 Caller Most of them.

25:12 Adam What do you, what are you coming in that?

25:14 Caller What do you mean?

25:15 Adam What, what, what can I put you down for on the roster? I'm putting the program together.

25:19 Caller Well, I'm quite athletic, but I weigh around 190.

25:24 Adam 190. 15?

25:28 Caller Uh-huh.

25:28 Adam Good, good high school size middle linebacker, maybe guard. What, how tall are you?

25:36 Caller Five foot, five and a half.

25:39 Adam So, so you're, you're sturdy.

25:42 Caller Yeah, I guess that's a good word.

25:44 Adam Yeah, you got a, you got a, you got a strong build. Hold on, let me do a little quick radio math. Did you say five, five and a half?

25:49 Drew She was giving me 190.

25:51 Adam Yeah, I believe her.

25:52 Drew That's the real thing.

25:53 Adam She may be 188. Alright, so, so you got, you're strong. You got big calves, right?

26:01 Caller Yeah, soccer legs.

26:02 Adam Yeah, alright baby. Well, maybe you scare the boys a little bit, you know, the physical department. They think you're gonna beat on them or something.

26:11 Caller I'm too, well, I have been like confronted by guys and by girls who want to fight me and they think I'm all tough and everything.

26:19 Adam Yeah.

26:20 Caller But I don't fight them because I'm too afraid what would happen if I would.

26:25 Drew That you might hurt them.

26:26 Caller I might hurt them and I'm too afraid.

26:29 Adam I see her making a fist and coming down on top of their head and like driving them into the ground.

26:34 Drew Yeah, like Fred Flintstone.

26:36 Adam I was thinking more like Hassan Chak.

26:38 Caller I remember hitting this one girl like just basically she got, I got really mad at her. So I picked her up and threw her across the room.

26:44 Adam All right, hold on. Hold on a second there, Susquatch. Hold on. Hey, Drew.

26:49 Drew Yeah.

26:49 Adam Remember at the beginning of the call, it was 15 and I'm a little shy around guys.

26:56 Drew Yeah. Why won't the guy? No, no, I'm assertive around guys.

26:59 Adam Right.

26:59 Drew Why won't they make out with me?

27:00 Adam I'm not meeting the fellas. Yeah. Starting to come into focus now a little bit.

27:04 Drew Yeah. Why can't she take reality in? You know what I'm saying? What's going on there?

27:11 Adam You know what I'm saying? I don't know, but here it comes. Maureen?

27:14 Drew Yeah.

27:15 Adam Hi, baby. You're aggressive.

27:18 Drew People don't like that.

27:19 Adam Aggressive slash angry.

27:21 Drew People don't like that.

27:22 Adam When that is backed up with a Mike Singletary type physique, they're going to be in the Hall of Fame, middle lineback for the Bears. When they're backed up with that kind of physique, it frightens people, males and females.

27:39 Drew It puts them off.

27:41 Adam No, they're scared for their safety.

27:42 Drew It also puts them off.

27:43 Adam So, Maureen?

27:44 Caller Yes?

27:45 Adam 55, 190. Sounds like maybe you probably lose a few pounds.

27:49 Caller I've tried so hard so many times.

27:52 Adam Really?

27:52 Drew You should see a dietician. I guarantee you it can be done.

27:56 Caller I don't think my parents would fall for that. I've asked for, like, dieticians and...

28:02 Drew Why is that? Why would your parents allow you that?

28:04 Caller Because they're both fat, too, and...

28:06 Adam Yeah.

28:07 Caller They don't... They went through childhood being fat.

28:10 Adam Right.

28:11 Caller They feel like I should be punished for it, too. All the gene pool. All right.

28:14 Adam Well, now some of that venom is starting to come forward. This is why you're scaring people. Listen. Here's what you need to do. Don't eat so much and get a lot of exercise. And I don't eat that much.

28:27 Drew And you may be a big person.

28:28 Adam Oh, you got. Yeah. I know you got the genes. But what I'm saying is, is you got to work overtime.

28:33 Drew It's not about eating that much. It's about what you eat and the balance of what you eat. You got to eat more protein.

28:39 Caller That's what my, that's what my family, well, my mom says I should, I should cut back on is my protein, is I have too much protein.

28:47 Adam Well, let's go through real quick. What do you eat in the morning? Ready? Go.

28:51 Caller Okay. Omelet, orange juice, toast.

28:54 Drew Cut the toast, the orange juice, and the cheese out.

28:57 Caller Okay.

28:57 Drew Okay.

28:58 Adam All right. Then what about, what about for lunch?

29:01 Drew How about half a piece of toast?

29:02 Caller Chicken and rice burrito with...

29:04 Drew No, no. Stay with the chicken and the rice. That's it. Okay. Keep going.

29:09 Caller All right. And for dinner, today is my birthday.

29:11 Adam Two lambs and a cow.

29:13 Caller Today is my birthday, so.

29:15 Drew Well, what do you normally eat for dinner?

29:18 Caller Normally, I would say between five and six ounces of beef.

29:24 Drew You may want to convert that over some whiter meats.

29:26 Adam What is your dad, like the power lifting coach for the University of Nebraska?

29:32 Caller No, but we live in California, so we use the barbie a lot.

29:36 Drew Barbecue.

29:37 Caller Yeah. All right.

29:38 Adam I thought they ate a barbie. I thought she ate a barbie's dream condo for a snack.

29:44 Drew But listen, Mary, there's lots of room for improvement in that diet.

29:46 Adam A lot.

29:47 Drew And it's not the protein part.

29:48 Adam Baby, cut them carbs out and start going lighter.

29:51 Drew And reduce the calories. Just cut the proportions in half and cut out the carbs. You know, cut them out completely, but to reduce them.

29:58 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Stop the eating. There you go.

30:01 Drew There's plenty of fat there going too.

30:02 Adam All right. We're going to take ourselves. And let me tell you this. All right. I got to say a few things. Screw that commercial there, Anderson. Couple things. One is, if you're 15 and you're clocking in at 1955, the future don't look rosy. Because let me tell you, you get bigger. You don't get much taller. As a woman, you're 5'5, 5'5, and a half and 15. You're lucky to grow another inch, inch and a quarter before you're done. But you will keep getting wider.

30:30 Caller Believe what you mean.

30:31 Drew Let's talk about that issue.

30:33 Adam Alright, I've got things to say. We'll be right back after this.

30:38 You know what I'm saying, I'm dead?

30:39 Caller Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline.

31:07 Drew Letting you know you care about them because they find this thing in the middle of the day.

31:11 Adam No. Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. I'm just talking about eating and food and all of a sudden, parenting. No, no.

31:22 Drew Lack therein?

31:23 Adam Yes, phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. All right, when we left off, we're gonna talk a little bit about diet and weight.

31:32 Drew Well, yeah.

31:33 Adam All that stuff.

31:34 Drew Something we've said many, many times, how awfully people are treated when they're overweight in our society.

31:39 Adam Nobody's treated worse than fat people.

31:42 Drew Yeah.

31:43 Adam And any ethnicity that wants to complain, you still would be much better off being whatever ethnicity you are, no matter how discriminated against, rather than being fat. That is the worst. And here's the example I use, and here's all the argument you ever need. First off, any company, any company would hire a person of any race, if they were attractive, over an overweight person of a fat white person. I believe. If you're hiring a receptionist, a secretary, whatever, I believe you're hiring an attractive, fill-in-the-blank ethnicity, over some fat white chick any day of the week. And when it comes to dating, I have friends who will date anything that's attractive. Filipino, black, Indian, whatever you are, if you ain't fat, they're in. If you're fat, it don't matter what you are, they're out. Think about that in terms of discrimination.

32:55 Drew Now, the overweight issue in dating, they're not, people are not completely off everyone's list.

33:01 Adam No, black guys like the fat ladies.

33:03 Drew And some people, you know, could still be attractive and be overweight. You know what I mean?

33:07 Adam They can be, but they would look better if they weren't.

33:10 Drew And some people have the genetic disadvantage. Most, most.

33:14 Adam That is the sad part here.

33:16 Drew That it's not, you're not going to be Cindy Crawford by doing her, following her videos, no matter what.

33:20 Adam Right. All those videos are good for jacking off to. I've said that many times. All those Cindy Crawford workout are 15 minutes to tight abs or how you can look like me. Please, Claudia Schiffer, whoever it is. They look like they look like because that's how they were born.

33:40 Caller That is their cut.

33:41 Drew Just to bring up something that happened to us last night, your friend Chris.

33:44 Adam Yes.

33:45 Drew And his genetic proclivity.

33:47 Adam I have a couple of friends who happen to be abnormally muscular for guys who drink coffee, smoke cigarettes and sit on their ass all day.

33:56 Drew Way abnormally. Yes, to the point where if I had come to my office, I would have insisted on a muscle biopsy because I would have been convinced he had muscular dystrophy or a testicular tumor.

34:09 Adam I had my buddy Chris roll up his sleeve, make a fist and turn his wrist in like he was trying to touch his knuckles against the inside of his wrist. And Drew, you witnessed the softball size muscle that came bulging forth from his forearm.

34:24 Drew But the circumference of his forearm was the width of my neck.

34:27 Adam Right. Now, how did he get that?

34:30 Drew Drinking beer.

34:32 Adam Smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee, and working on a laptop computer.

34:36 Drew That is nuts.

34:38 Adam That's how he got that forearm. Okay. Now, what is it? That's genetics. That's the hand he got dealt to him. Now, he could write a book on ten simple ways to bigger forearms.

34:52 Drew People would buy it because he has big forearms.

34:54 Adam Right. Does he know anything about it?

34:57 Drew No.

34:57 Adam No. Does he lift weights? No. No.

35:00 Drew No. That's not to say that people are condemned to the hand they're dealt. You can change a fair amount.

35:07 Adam Here's what you can do. You should treat your body like a car, which is you cannot change your Datsun into a Ferrari. Once in a while, somebody does. They buy that Fiero and they try to turn it into a Testarossa.

35:24 Drew Big mistake.

35:25 Adam What's it look like?

35:26 Drew Like hell.

35:26 Adam Crap. It's a mess. It fools drunk people from a mile away. Other than that, you're screwed. Now, you know what you do with your car? You keep it clean. You keep it running right. You change the fluids.

35:40 Drew Paint it up real nice.

35:41 Adam Maybe put a little tint on the window and a little armor on the tire. You try to make it the best version of that Nissan Sentra that it can be. But don't try to make it something else. That's all you can do with you. Just eat right, drink a lot of water, and take heroin and you'll lose that way.

36:00 Drew We need to say, can we say something a little more inspirational? Just look like the Daihatsu.

36:05 Adam I'm saying, okay, here's what I'm saying. I'm saying that last caller we spoke to was 5'5. She was 190 pounds and she was 15 years old. Both her parents were behemoths, right? Okay, so what is it? It's an uphill battle for her. She is gonna have to work 10 times as hard as Cindy Crawford has to work to look half as good as Cindy Crawford. But what is her option? B.O.B.'s? Nope, she's gotta have that discipline. And she has to do that just like somebody who's born with a little disability. We all, some people are dyslexic, they have to work on their reading. Some people have a bad male pattern baldness, they have to take parpecia. Some people are fill in the blank, they have to work with that. They have crooked teeth, they gotta wear braces. You're born with that, you gotta work on it. Thank you. David?

37:07 Caller Hey, Loveline.

37:08 Adam Oh, thank god we're perfect, Drew.

37:11 Caller Hey, Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew, I just wanted to add that it's an honor to talk to people that have such an impact on the use of the nation because the work that you do for our society is not surmounted by any other talk show host.

37:28 Adam Thank you, David.

37:30 Caller So, let me just tell you about my problem. I was hanging out with some buddies of mine, just kicking back out in the country, and I was urinating and a bee actually stung me on the penis while I was urinating, so...

37:47 Adam Wow, that's cursed.

37:48 Caller Yeah, this was about like three days ago, and I just was wondering why it hurts when I'm making love to my girlfriend.

37:59 Adam Is the stinger and the poison pouch still attached?

38:02 Caller Well, I removed it almost immediately after it happened.

38:05 Adam I see.

38:05 Drew So there was a stinger?

38:07 Caller Yes.

38:07 Drew So it was a honeybee?

38:09 Caller Yeah, well, I was stupid enough to do it next to a bunch of beehives, and I really didn't think that the odds were against me, so I just, I was being kind of like an ass.

38:19 Adam Right. Well, David, it reminds me of when I was in high school and I took a crap on a hornet's nest.

38:24 Caller Right.

38:25 Adam Yeah, big mistake. Huge mistake.

38:27 Drew That's what that carbuncle arrived.

38:30 Adam Huge.

38:30 Caller You don't have to mock me. I mean, I know that I screwed up.

38:33 Adam I know, but David, here's the part we don't believe. Your question is, why is there pain when you make love to your girlfriend after you got stung on the door?

38:43 Caller The swelling has gone down significantly.

38:46 Adam I see.

38:47 Drew And also a bunch of people laughing in the background.

38:49 Caller And it's not even swollen whatsoever. There's just a little dot, and it's still hurting throughout my body. All right.

38:55 Drew Well, guess what?

38:56 What should you do?

38:58 Drew There can still be infection. There still can be inflammation.

39:01 Adam Yeah.

39:01 Drew And I've actually seen, remember the days of the flesh-eating bacteria? Sure. That was a big front headline. Yes. And I kept saying, we've had this since World War I, and just different bacteria causing the syndrome.

39:12 Adam Yeah.

39:12 Drew And magically we forgot about it, but it's still out there. And I saw a guy get it from a nice infection on the door, because you say.

39:18 Adam Really? Oh, yeah. It's been a beautiful sight.

39:21 Drew Oh, yes.

39:22 Adam The flesh-eating bacteria started on.

39:25 Drew Well, it was actually right next to his dork, like right where the dork attaches.

39:28 Adam The dork attaches.

39:30 Drew And that's a technical term, yeah.

39:32 Caller Yeah.

39:35 Drew And so that's an area where bacterial infection can spread rather rapidly and easily.

39:39 Adam Let me tell you something, whenever my penis is out, I'm on guard. I don't care if I'm in the middle of the desert, I don't care if I'm standing in front of my sink at home. I'm on guard. My head's on a swivel. I'm like a middle linebacker who's dropped back into past coverage. I'm looking. Do you know what I'm saying?

39:58 Drew Yeah. And there's no way that's a natural reaction.

40:02 Adam No way it could land on my penis because I would have blasted him out of the air before he got close.

40:08 Drew With some sort of taekwondo kick.

40:10 Adam Of urine.

40:11 Drew Oh, I see.

40:12 Adam I would have looked at it is. I would have been like would have been like a akak fire as a as a bonsai plane tried to attack the ship. See what I mean?

40:22 Drew Yeah.

40:23 Adam I would have blown it out of the air before it got to the landing deck of the carrier known as the SS Dork.

40:31 Caller Thank you.

40:32 Adam All right. He's fine. HMS, HMS, Dork, Ryan.

40:38 Yeah.

40:39 Adam You're 24.

40:40 Caller Yes, I am 24. How are you doing, Adam and Drew?

40:43 Adam Good.

40:43 Caller All right. Here's the deal. I've been with my girlfriend for about three years. And during the entire time, she's had the same kind of problem with her menstrual cycle.

40:55 Drew What problem is that?

40:57 Caller Just a very intense cramping and things like that.

41:00 Drew Irregular?

41:01 Caller What's that?

41:01 Drew Irregular?

41:03 Caller Yes, and rather irregular. Right. And so to deal with that, she's been on different forms of birth control, which I guess are supposed to help regulate it.

41:16 Drew Right. What's your question?

41:17 Caller And my question is that whatever she's on now is drying her out.

41:23 Drew Is she on like a mini-dose pill? Slow?

41:25 Caller Yes.

41:26 Drew Which one is she on?

41:28 Caller She's on the third one now. I can't remember what it's called.

41:32 Drew All right. Lowestrin, something like that.

41:34 Adam How about you get some AstroGlide on your Pepe?

41:38 Caller Well, here's the deal.

41:39 Caller It may not work.

41:42 Caller Whether it's AstroGlide or there's whatever, KY Jelly.

41:45 Adam Yeah.

41:46 Caller But is this something that's going to be, as long as she's on it, there's no way that we can work around this, or we have to rely on some kind of lubricant?

41:58 Drew She is. This is probably...

42:00 Caller There's been a significant difference.

42:01 Drew I know, Ryan. It's probably not going to get better, and she needs to report that to her doctor, who's adjusting these pills.

42:07 Adam Switch pills, right?

42:08 Drew Well, sometimes they can even just give you estrogen cream, and it's actually not a trivial issue for her, because the vaginal, the integrity of the vaginal lining is dependent on estrogen. If the estrogen levels aren't adequate, it becomes really irritating, and friable, it can break and be nasty. It's a mess for them. Yeah, and so she does need to pay attention. She needs to report to her doctor. He may just give estrogen cream, or they may change the pill. It's not enough estrogen or excess progesterone.

42:33 Adam Yeah, yeah. You want some lube, not too much, but then, you know, not enough. You got that dry, you got that sounds like a, sounds like a high school basketball game when you're having sex, you know?

42:46 Caller The court, the shoes on the court.

42:47 Adam The sneakers coming down, down court.

42:49 Drew That's nice. I don't like how that feels.

42:51 Adam That's bad times.

42:52 Drew Bad times.

42:52 Adam All right, take a little break.

42:53 Drew Sure.

42:54 Adam When we come back, we're going to talk to Tina. And he's sleeping with her boyfriend.

43:01 Drew I was going to do Joe, but that's fine.

43:02 Adam What about Joe? He's a condom.

43:05 Drew No.

43:06 Adam His penis swells in the condom.

43:08 Drew Erica? Without the condom.

43:10 Adam Where?

43:10 Drew Really?

43:11 Adam Let's talk to Tina. The boyfriend says he sleeps with his cousin, who's a male. That's good times. After this. Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, as Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1.

43:57 Drew Have we ever had weirder conversations during the break?

44:00 Adam No.

44:01 Drew And we've had some weird ones.

44:02 Adam Did you go to the K-Rock Christmas party tonight? No? Yeah, I mean, the triplets were sick. I had to go on. Oh, man.

44:10 Drew My kids are really sick.

44:11 Adam There's triplets, though. That's the greatest excuse for everything. They understand, you just begin. Anytime you don't, and see, the triplets are sick, right? Yeah, they are. Perfect. What I mean is, I'm a bachelor.

44:23 Drew Oh, you have no excuse.

44:23 Adam I live alone, and I don't have a job. You see what I'm saying?

44:28 Drew Oh, you have no excuse.

44:29 Adam I'm in my sweatpants all day with an erection.

44:31 Drew You don't show up.

44:33 Adam I don't show up, and people say, where were you?

44:36 Drew You were supposed to help us out.

44:38 Adam I show up, people say, where were you? I get two syllables in, and it's like, okay, cut the crap. Were you drunk? You stoned? What are you doing? Jacking off? You weren't doing anything. But Drew, why weren't you at the fill in the blank? Here's a Drew comes right back.

44:55 Drew I was at the hospital.

44:56 Adam The hospital. There was a emergency lipo, vac sex, sex, and me going on over there. They got a page, the triplets. I mean, between owning the triplets, are those your triplets or you just lease it?

45:09 Drew They belong to me. I don't know if owning is the right word.

45:11 Adam All right, you own those triplets. Between having the triplets and being a doctor, you can not show up for anything you want. You understand? And nobody gives you...

45:21 Drew The bad part is I don't get to show up for anything because of those things.

45:24 Adam I know.

45:24 Drew That's the sad part.

45:25 Adam But if you don't feel like showing up on something, you're not going to get an ounce of grief.

45:31 Drew I see.

45:34 Adam You know what I'm saying?

45:36 Drew You swallow that back in.

45:36 Adam I got to get me some of them triplets. Where'd you get those triplets?

45:41 Drew I just put something in a cup.

45:43 Adam Yeah. Some money in a cup.

45:44 Drew No, no.

45:44 Adam Some stuff in a vending machine.

45:46 Drew Put it in a cup. You had to lay it in a white coat.

45:48 Adam You got the triplets?

45:49 Drew She mixed it up.

45:50 Adam Why'd they set you back?

45:52 Drew Insurance Company took care of it, actually, back in those days.

45:53 Adam Really? Insurance Company? I can give myself some triplets. And then what's upkeep on triplets?

45:59 Caller Oh.

46:00 Adam Well, I'm not going to raise them. I mean, we ain't going to move into Disney World like you guys. What is this, $75, $80 a month, something like that? Is it more than satellite?

46:10 Drew Yeah, it's more than satellite. Well, satellite is part of the deal.

46:13 Adam Hmm. All right. Maybe I'll get some twins. That seems like a compromise. Tina?

46:19 Caller Yeah.

46:19 Adam You're 18?

46:21 Caller Uh-huh.

46:22 Adam All right. So your boyfriend says he's sleeping with his male cousin?

46:26 Caller Um, actually, he's not right now. But he has. What happened was, like, he told me about a week ago that this had occurred for a couple of years. And the thing is, when it was happening, it was probably a couple of years ago, but, like, he never used protection with it. And...

46:44 Adam I see.

46:45 Drew What is your question? What is your question?

46:46 Caller The whole time we've had sex, we have never used protection.

46:50 Drew I see.

46:51 Caller I'm just wondering...

46:52 Drew How is it you're not pregnant?

46:53 Caller I don't know.

46:55 Drew All right. Have you seen a gynecologist? Have you seen a doctor? Had a pelvic exam?

47:00 Caller Um, no. I went to go get a pregnancy test once, but it was negative.

47:05 Adam Hey, Tina?

47:06 Caller Yeah?

47:06 Adam When I'm in charge?

47:08 Caller Uh-huh.

47:08 Adam I'm gonna put people like you down.

47:10 Drew You should have a chance.

47:12 Adam Uh, no.

47:12 Caller Okay.

47:13 Adam Putting you down. Because I look at you as an enemy of the state. You're having unprotected sex with this idiot. This, uh, sort of bisexual, cousin-banging screwball.

47:24 Caller The thing is, is like, he just told me about it. We could go on this half.

47:28 Adam Yeah, who cares?

47:29 Drew Yeah, it's who he is.

47:29 Adam This guy's a mess.

47:31 Drew Yeah, it's who he is.

47:31 Caller I mean, what, that's the thing. I don't know if I should get an AIDS test or what.

47:34 Adam I know. I don't care about you and the AIDS. I worry about you and the population. I mean, you're gonna have a kid with this idiot? Yeah. This guy puts both his legs into one, one pant side. What's this guy do? I'm picturing, I'm picturing it like a Mongoloid kid. I'm picturing it like a Deliverance-style banjo kid. What's this guy do for a living?

47:58 Caller Well, he's, right now, he's going to school, so he paints.

48:02 Drew Paints.

48:04 Caller Yeah.

48:04 Adam Yeah. Where's he going? Junior college?

48:06 Caller No.

48:06 Adam High school.

48:07 Caller Uh, university.

48:09 Adam University of junior college?

48:11 Caller No.

48:11 Adam Wake University.

48:12 Caller St. Cloud State.

48:14 Adam No. That's not a real university.

48:16 Caller I've never heard of it.

48:17 Adam All right.

48:18 Caller In Minnesota.

48:19 Caller I see.

48:19 Adam It's not a real state. Not a real university. Yeah. Hey, Tina.

48:24 Caller Yeah?

48:24 Adam What's up with you that you don't think you're going to get pregnant?

48:29 Caller Well, right now, I just started taking birth control.

48:32 Drew Okay, good.

48:33 Caller She's on birth control.

48:35 Caller I mean, it was stupid before, obviously. All right.

48:36 Drew Well, why don't we start with you just seeing, sitting down with the doctor, getting a pelvic exam, getting a routine health screening and going from there. And part of that can't be in HIV, if you want.

48:44 Adam Okay. But what's wrong with this kid?

48:47 I see.

48:47 Caller Okay. This happened a couple of years ago and he just told me about it now.

48:50 Adam But I don't I don't care if it happened in the, I was confused when he was younger, but. Confused?

48:56 Abused.

48:57 Adam Oh, now that's better. Now we're talking.

49:00 Caller But see, the thing I don't understand is, like I asked him, I said, I mean, he's not bisexual or anything.

49:05 Drew Not anymore.

49:07 Adam Not anymore.

49:08 Caller There was like a history of incest in his cousin's family.

49:12 Drew Has he had some treatment, this kid?

49:14 Caller Um, no, I'm the first person he ever told about it.

49:18 Drew So he's never had any treatment.

49:19 Adam Has he found Jesus Christ?

49:21 Caller Yeah. Well, we both go to church.

49:23 Drew Oh, maybe that's.

49:24 Adam All right. Well, he found Jesus.

49:26 Caller Yeah.

49:27 Adam OK. How's that going?

49:30 Caller I don't know. I'm just.

49:32 Adam OK. So you're a big fan of Jesus.

49:34 Is there like a big chance like they hold on that if I could have quit preaching for a second?

49:39 Drew No, there's not a huge chance you have AIDS. There's a slight.

49:42 Like, is that likely?

49:44 Drew No, it's not likely. But you do should do appropriate screening and health care. It's sit down with the doctor and go over all these things.

49:51 OK.

49:52 Drew And you have your pelvic exam done and check for warts and cervical cancer and do all those more likely things that are going to happen to you. And again, the process also gets green frayed. That's fine.

50:01 Adam Jesus and Napoleon came to me in a dream last night.

50:05 Really?

50:05 Drew No, you were Napoleon?

50:07 Adam No. Oh. And he told me that you needed to get some birth control.

50:11 I know.

50:12 Caller I'm just sorry.

50:12 Drew He's on it. She's on it. All right.

50:13 Caller Stay on it. But I also have one more question. Yeah. If I'm on like, say, if I was pregnant right now and I'm on birth control.

50:21 Drew It doesn't do anything. No.

50:22 Caller It doesn't do anything to the baby. Okay.

50:25 Drew All right. All right.

50:26 Adam Oh, boy. Yeah. This is just who we need as daddy. Mr. Painter, Mr. House Painter, Incest, Hillbilly, Cousin Cornhole and family guy going to a college I never heard of guy. Oh, my God. Cousin Cornhole. Wasn't he the Adams family cousin cornhole? Was that a wasn't he the who's that that huge rectum that walked around with hair coming out of the side? I was cousin it. Yeah. Seeing a cousin cornhole, that'd be good. Cousin Cornhole. And he like he like could talk like, but it'd be like it'd be farting. Yeah, but you know what I mean? That'd be funny, wouldn't it?

51:12 Drew This is a highbrow comedy. All right. Nice.

51:14 Adam We'll take a break. We'll be back.

51:17 Caller Hello. Is this Loveline? Call 1-800-LOVE-1-1 Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.

51:43 Ranging Talk Radio, 100.7, The Buzz, KQBC, Seattle.

51:54 Adam Yeah. Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, and he is Dr. Drew. Over there, phone number, 1-800-LOVE-1-9-1. Drew, you saw the big Cousin Christmas last night?

52:06 Drew I did, it got a good review on the paper, too.

52:07 Adam Oh, it did? What was that?

52:09 Drew They like Moby and No Doubt.

52:11 Adam The paper?

52:12 Drew Yeah, Benjamin Franklin, I forget.

52:20 Adam Oh, there's words written on the thing that's folded up? Yeah. Yeah, I enjoyed No Doubt and Moby, and who else was good? Oh, you know, I always watch them every year, Green Day, I love Green Day, great live band. And a lot of people don't like Green Day that much, but good live band. And Incubus was good, too. And Papa Roach was good last night. Anderson, you ever see anybody stuck out? You were there at the big concert.

52:52 Caller I liked Linkin Park.

52:53 Drew I did, I did too.

52:54 Adam Oh, Linkin Park.

52:55 Drew A lot. I was very impressed with them.

52:57 Caller I liked their two main singers.

52:58 Adam Yeah. Geez, I don't think I caught Linkin Park.

53:01 Drew No, they were in the opening, I don't think you even got in there yet.

53:03 Adam I was probably trying to work on my buzz. You know what I mean?

53:07 Drew Yeah, move on.

53:07 Adam Go down, come up.

53:08 Caller On Coldplay ruled.

53:10 Adam Coldplay was good?

53:11 Drew I didn't see that. Yeah, they kept making fun of Limp Bizkit.

53:14 Adam Oh, how dare they. Autumn?

53:17 Caller Yes.

53:17 Adam You're, how old is Autumn?

53:19 Caller I'm 22.

53:20 Drew Okay.

53:21 Adam How are you?

53:22 Caller I'm pretty good.

53:22 How are you doing?

53:23 Adam You're fantastic. What's going on?

53:27 What's up?

53:28 Adam All right, hold on a second. She bleeds during her period. Come on, Drew. Hey, Lauren, come on, get us some calls where some guy got his nuts caught in a blender or something or some chick with a huge boob has to walk with a wheelbarrow in front of her or something. Bouncy, bouncy. I'm good. I'm tired about chicks sloughing off their minstrel parts and stuff. I've taken the pill. My vagina's dry. What the hell is that? That's not titillating. Give me something I can jack to.

54:02 Drew Or some interpersonal stuff too.

54:04 Adam Yeah. I want something weird, something bizarre, naughty. Not just a bunch of gynecological questions. Let her hang on a second.

54:14 Drew There's a lot more sort of medical stuff out here.

54:16 Adam It's all metal. I got a wart. I want something good. All right. What about this guy with the gambling problem? All right. I'll go for that. Maybe we'll get something out of him. Erica. Erica.

54:29 Guest Hi, guys.

54:29 Adam What's up?

54:31 Guest Let's see. Yeah. My boyfriend has a gambling problem. And it's been going on for a long time. And he's always understood the severity of it. And he's been willing to admit that.

54:42 So what?

54:44 Guest I'm sorry?

54:44 Drew So what?

54:46 Guest Of the gambling problem? Yeah.

54:47 Drew So what? So he admits it.

54:49 Guest Right.

54:49 Drew If he doesn't make change, so what?

54:51 Guest He's always made it abundantly clear.

54:53 Adam Don't talk to the college, please.

54:55 Drew I'm about to declare what?

54:57 Caller That he has no intention of stopping.

54:59 Drew Right. So who cares if he admits he has a big problem or not? That's nothing.

55:02 Guest All right. Just recently.

55:05 Adam How much does he? What do you want? A speakerphone or some kind of 10-second delay?

55:09 Guest No.

55:10 Adam All right. Listen to me. How much does he lose a month?

55:14 A lot.

55:16 Adam Okay.

55:17 Drew No. Give me a second to regroup.

55:19 Adam No. Putting her on hold. I want to know how much does he lose a month? I know you're not going to get it down to the cent. I understand that. Maybe not even down to, you know, I'll give you a couple hundred bucks either way. Give me a ballpark. A lot. What's a lot? Is it 300 bucks or is that 300,000?

55:41 Drew Well, I mean, is it insane or is it?

55:43 Adam Well, it could be 2500 bucks. All right. How much does he lose a month?

55:49 Guest He can lose anywhere from about 500 to 2000.

55:52 Adam I see. And what's he doing? What's he do for a living?

55:56 Guest He works at his father's restaurant.

55:58 Adam I see. And so he has a true addiction.

56:01 Guest Yes.

56:02 Drew Well, here's the deal. Gambling addiction, in my experience, doesn't occur by itself. That is to say, it is almost always in conjunction with some other drug addiction. Either history of or concurrent drug use.

56:17 Adam Hold on a second. I was on the phone tonight all night on and off with Cousin Sal. Jimmy Kimmel's Cousin Sal, who's a chronic gambler, who was going absolutely insane because it was the last game of his football, fairy tale football league. And Warwick Dunn is, yes, I know it's fantasy football. Thank you, Anderson.

56:40 Drew What did you call it?

56:41 Adam I call it fairy tale football because it's slightly more insulting to those idiots who are caught up in it. This poor son of a bitch. He had like the Rams player. He had Marshall Falk and the other guy who he's tied up with in his fairy tale football league had Warwick Dunn, the running back for the Buccaneers. And they were both just going off all night, but Marshall Falk basically got it at the end and this is the end of the season. It was like 700 bucks in his pocket and very last play of the game. Warwick Dunn scoots in for a two yard after the Bucs are pinned down after they're going for it on fourth down. They have to drive the length of the field with no timeouts in a minute and a half left in the game and Warwick Dunn pushes it in and he's just, Sal's just going insane. I'm on the phone with him. I mean, that's the thing about gambling. I mean, he had 700 bucks that was in his pocket in Dunn. The Rams had the ball. They had the ball in the 35 yard line of the Bucks. The Bucks had no timeouts left. It was done. The game was over and the one guy that he couldn't have score ends up scoring one more time before the game's over at the end of the season, taking the money right out of his pocket.

58:02 Caller It'll curse your ass.

58:04 Drew Well, a gambler, right? It's gambling.

58:06 Adam But, Cousin Sal does nothing.

58:10 Drew Heavy gambling is not necessarily gambling.

58:11 Adam He has a little cannoli addiction. Other than that, nothing.

58:14 Drew I don't see Sal as an addict.

58:15 Adam He drinks soda.

58:16 Drew Yeah, no, no. He's a gambler, but not a compulsive, over-the-top gambler.

58:24 Adam No, he's not James Cahn.

58:27 Drew So, Erica, what else is going on here? Alcohol, what?

58:30 Guest Nothing.

58:32 Drew No history of substance?

58:33 Guest He doesn't touch drugs. I mean, he may drink on a Saturday night.

58:37 Drew He had no history with drugs?

58:39 Guest No.

58:39 Adam Does he gamble on hockey?

58:41 Guest No.

58:42 Adam All right, well, he doesn't have that bad problem.

58:44 Drew Is his dad or mom an alcoholic?

58:47 Guest No.

58:49 Caller His mom goes to Tahoe, but I don't think that has anything to do with it.

58:52 Adam Yeah.

58:53 Drew I think you ought to look more carefully, because it's very unusual. I mean, it happens, but it's very unusual for them to have...

58:58 Adam Listen, Erica, what do you care?

59:00 Guest Well, my question is, how does he stop?

59:03 Adam He wants to stop, but he doesn't want to stop.

59:05 Drew No, he doesn't want to stop.

59:06 Guest He wants to stop now.

59:08 Drew Why?

59:09 Caller He cried about it. He is very unhappy with the way his life is.

59:13 Adam Sure.

59:14 Drew Yeah, take him to GA.

59:15 Adam No, the Saints didn't cover last week. He cried like a baby.

59:19 Drew Why don't you take him to get him over to GA?

59:22 Guest Is that like a group thing?

59:23 Drew Gambling Anonymous, that is the treatment for gambling compulsion.

59:27 Guest And that will help?

59:28 Drew It's the treatment. If he does the work. What do I say?

59:31 Adam Listen, listen, hold on a second, let's just do a little recap. Take him over to GA, huh? GA, Gamblers Anonymous, that's a group thing? Yes, that will...

59:43 Drew That's the treatment.

59:44 Adam Yeah, that's the treatment. And that will help? Oh, who cares?

59:51 Drew One quick question first. Does she have a dad that's an alcoholic? Do you have an alcoholic dad?

59:56 Guest No, I do not.

59:57 Drew Or mom?

59:58 Guest No.

59:58 Adam Okay, so, Drew...

1:00:00 Drew There's something missing in this story.

1:00:02 Adam Oh, we don't care.

1:00:02 Drew No, there's a big piece missing here.

1:00:04 Adam Erica, you do what you want with him. Oh. Well, listen, Drew just told you what to do. Why do you answer with, dad'll help? I know you're desperate, but he's telling you what to do, just do it. He's got to go to Gamblers Anonymous. They're quite an organization. There's plenty of them everywhere.

1:00:24 Caller Okay?

1:00:25 Adam He wants to quit. That's what he does.

1:00:26 Drew That's the treatment.

1:00:27 Adam All right. If that, if he doesn't do that.

1:00:30 Drew It's not going to stop.

1:00:31 Adam Right.

1:00:32 Drew If he doesn't get some sort of help with this. But I also believe strongly that if she looks more careful, she'll find some other drug use, pot, something.

1:00:39 Adam Yeah. I don't gamble. The reason I don't gamble is because I believe I'm cursed. Yeah.

1:00:44 Drew I don't gamble because I don't like to lose money. It's just losing. It's just, you just go, unless I have a certain amount set aside for entertainment.

1:00:50 Adam Yeah. Listen, I've seen my life. I shouldn't be gambling. Yeah.

1:00:54 Drew I mean, listen, they stop calling them games of chance because the game of chance is a chance you're going to win. That is just called adult entertainment.

1:01:01 Adam They call gambling adult entertainment?

1:01:03 Drew It's all over games of chance.

1:01:05 Adam I got to get back into this. They don't call it adult entertainment. No, they do not. Well, listen, all I know is I have wretched luck and I can't gamble. The last 15 times I've been to Vegas, I've lost my ass every time with the same thing. Play 21 for an hour, build up some chips, let it all ride on the last hand, lose every goddamn time. Oh, that is so true. Autumn? All right, so you bleed during your period in between and when you masturbate.

1:01:43 Caller During my period, yes.

1:01:44 Adam Yes.

1:01:46 Caller And I'm curious as to why.

1:01:48 Caller You've never had that before?

1:01:50 Caller No, I just started within the last year.

1:01:51 Drew Are you on any medication?

1:01:53 Caller No, I don't take any medication whatsoever.

1:01:57 Adam Hold on a second. Hey, Lauren, phone screen, you really need to bleed during period and in between when she masturbates? I know, I know. I'm going to make Lauren cry. But doesn't everyone bleed during their period? Is that how they know? That's how they know it's their period, right?

1:02:17 Drew That's how.

1:02:18 Adam All right. All right, Adam. So when you masturbate. Oh, yeah.

1:02:23 Drew Well, mid-cycle bleeding is not uncommon. And you ought to get, you know, have regular lab work, make sure it's not a thyroid problem, make sure you don't have ovarian cysts or any problems with anatomy of the uterus. You had a pelvic exam recently?

1:02:36 Caller Not within the last year and a half.

1:02:38 Drew I mean, you can have polyps and fibros, all kinds of things can cause mid-cycle bleeding.

1:02:42 Adam But what are you masturbating with? A piece of rebar?

1:02:45 Caller Nothing but my finger.

1:02:46 Adam I see. Well, that doesn't explain it. So as she gets stimulated, she starts bleeding. Yep. How often are you doing that?

1:02:55 Caller Maybe once or twice a month.

1:02:57 Adam That's weird. Women, but they're once or twice a month.

1:03:00 Caller I'm not big on masturbation.

1:03:04 Adam I see. But you do it once, twice a month just to keep it real?

1:03:08 Caller No, I don't know. Just because I feel like it.

1:03:11 Adam I see. Yeah. All right. That's the thing about women too. I don't think they plan it like guys do. You know what I mean? Set aside some masturbatory time.

1:03:22 Drew It's like a military assault operation.

1:03:25 Adam Yeah. I got a whole model of my bedroom. VCRs over here. Having a big like a war room in my basement.

1:03:34 Drew Desert porn.

1:03:35 Adam Yeah. Slide the mock up mink of videos over here. Then the hampers over here. Then the hamper makes a move this way. So I cut back with the videos.

1:03:47 Drew So you're moving yourself around with a big long wooden stick.

1:03:49 Adam That's right. Like the old war room.

1:03:51 Drew Yeah.

1:03:52 Adam All right. Let's talk to Joe. Joe's 21. Joe?

1:03:56 Caller Hey, how's it going?

1:03:56 Adam Good.

1:03:57 Caller Thanks for taking my phone call.

1:03:58 Adam Sure, Joe.

1:03:59 Caller Here's the situation. I've been going out with my girlfriend for about four years. In the past recent, the last two months, we usually have sex protected because we've had a kid and we learned all that. Recently, we've had unprotected sex. After I'm done, we're done doing it underneath the tip of my penis. It gets swollen for like, it'll stay like that for one, two days and it will go down. It won't happen again. It doesn't happen if I masturbate. It doesn't happen if we do it with condom. Just when we have unsafe sex.

1:04:33 Adam Uh-huh.

1:04:35 Drew I'm not quite sure where you're describing the swelling.

1:04:37 Adam Underneath his penis.

1:04:38 Caller Underneath? No, no, no. Like where the, you know where the head is? Right underneath the head.

1:04:43 Drew Like the frenulum sort of area. Not, not the urethra itself.

1:04:48 Caller What would you?

1:04:49 Drew Are you uncircumcised?

1:04:51 Caller Yeah, I am circumcised.

1:04:52 Drew You're circumcised.

1:04:53 Adam Yeah, but when you say underneath it, you mean when you're standing up, the bottom side of the head.

1:05:01 Caller Yeah.

1:05:02 Adam Just stay with me.

1:05:03 Caller Okay, I'm trying to. It's hard to describe. I'm sorry.

1:05:06 Adam All right, but hold on a second.

1:05:07 Caller Okay.

1:05:09 Adam Let's say your head is your actual head that's on top of your shoulders.

1:05:13 Caller It would be my neck.

1:05:15 Adam Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's not underneath it.

1:05:20 Drew It's around it.

1:05:21 Adam It's underneath it when you're on your back.

1:05:22 Caller Yeah, correct.

1:05:23 Adam But when you're standing up, it's in front of it.

1:05:25 Drew Correct.

1:05:26 Adam See what I'm saying?

1:05:27 Drew Correct.

1:05:28 Adam All right.

1:05:28 Drew It's like.

1:05:29 Adam It'd be your neck. Right.

1:05:31 Drew The neck is irritated.

1:05:33 Caller Yeah.

1:05:33 Adam Yeah. And it gets inflamed. Yeah. Like when a football player puts on one of those neck toilet seats, one of those neck braces.

1:05:40 Caller Yeah. You got it.

1:05:41 Adam Exactly. I have one of those in high school.

1:05:42 Caller Yeah.

1:05:42 Drew That's a pretty common thing, actually. Yeah. I'm not sure necessarily. Make sure you have adequate lubrication. Don't go for too long.

1:05:51 Adam Maybe it's just irritated.

1:05:52 Drew Yeah. It's just irritated. Maybe some yeast there. It's possible.

1:05:56 Adam All right. A little yeasty on the peckeroo. Let's get to the big boob calls. Alex?

1:06:02 Guest Yeah.

1:06:02 Adam You're 16?

1:06:03 Caller Yes.

1:06:05 Adam What's up with the boobs there, Bambi?

1:06:08 Guest I don't know. A few days ago, I hurt my back really bad. I was doing the laundry and I don't know why it cracked and I couldn't move for a few minutes. It took a while for me to stand back up and I got really scared.

1:06:21 Drew Low back, upper back?

1:06:22 Guest Yeah. Lower back.

1:06:24 Adam How big are the boobs?

1:06:25 Guest 38F.

1:06:27 Adam Hold on a second. Bouncy, bouncy. 38F, huh?

1:06:31 Caller Yeah.

1:06:32 Adam 16?

1:06:33 Guest 16.

1:06:34 Adam Yeah, it's a lot of boob for a 16 year old. Let's get the vitals on you. How much do you weigh?

1:06:42 Guest Like around 180.

1:06:44 Adam Alright, hold on a second. Hold on. Oh, wait a minute. I'm going to get a height call in here. Alex, height on you. You got 180 on the weight. What's the height? 5'6. 5'6. Hold on a second now. Alright, just a little radio math. This one has a little twist on it because I got the around 180. Unfortunately, that adds 13% to the calculation. 5'6, 180, around, gets factored in, and then they 38'F, doing the laundry. Did the radio math here. Okay, I came up with 5'4, 5'16, 2'02, and 6 oz.

1:07:34 Guest No.

1:07:34 Adam No. Okay. But a little over 180, right?

1:07:38 Guest Yeah, around 185.

1:07:40 Adam Okay. And so you're stout. You got some, you're not, I wouldn't call you, no, I wouldn't call you fat, but you're sturdy, right? Yeah. And do you want to lose some of that boob weight?

1:07:56 Guest Yeah.

1:07:57 Adam Yeah. Are you depressed, or is this what you always sound like?

1:08:00 Guest Yeah. I mean, it bothers me.

1:08:03 Adam The boobs, too?

1:08:03 Guest Yeah, it does.

1:08:05 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Why don't you try losing some weight? Maybe lose some boob.

1:08:11 Guest Yeah, I've been trying that.

1:08:13 Adam Yeah. What's going on with that?

1:08:15 Guest I don't know. I guess... I don't know. I'm at school, and I'm not really that active person.

1:08:23 Adam Hey, Alex?

1:08:24 Guest Yeah?

1:08:25 Adam You've been huffing some computer cleaner or something, or is this what you always sound like?

1:08:32 Guest No.

1:08:32 Adam Why? Are you high? Have you been sucking on ether?

1:08:37 Guest No, I'm not high right now.

1:08:38 Adam Not right now?

1:08:39 Caller No.

1:08:40 Adam What's up with you? This is it? This is what you got for the radio?

1:08:44 Drew You sound depressed. What's the point?

1:08:47 Caller Oh...

1:08:49 Drew That may have more to do with, you know, while you're...

1:08:52 Adam What else is going on in your life?

1:08:55 Guest Nothing really.

1:08:57 Adam Your parents okay?

1:08:58 Guest Uh... Yeah, they're divorced, though.

1:09:01 Adam Yeah. Anyone molest you?

1:09:02 Guest No.

1:09:03 Adam Anyone beat on you?

1:09:04 Guest Nope.

1:09:05 Adam You're a virgin?

1:09:06 Guest Yes.

1:09:08 Adam Anyone got hold of those boobs of yours?

1:09:11 Guest Yeah.

1:09:12 Adam Yeah? Oh, that son of a bitch. How old was he?

1:09:16 Guest Sixteen.

1:09:17 Caller Oh!

1:09:19 Adam He's still walking on air. Yeah, he probably didn't know where he was. That he died once in a, like, Valhalla or something. He didn't know where he was. Oh, my God. Did he go crazy when he saw all those things?

1:09:35 Guest I don't know, well... I think that's only why he probably was talking to me.

1:09:40 Adam Oh, no.

1:09:42 Guest That's why, too, like, I...

1:09:43 Adam No. You think he was only talking to you because of the boobs?

1:09:47 Guest Yep.

1:09:47 Adam No. Yeah. I know. And let me tell you something I haven't talked about before in my past. And I don't know. It's a little painful. So I'm brought up. But I have a particularly beautiful looking scrotum. And when I was in high school, a lot of the girls spoke to me because of my exquisite scrotum.

1:10:08 Drew Pearly, pearly scrotum.

1:10:10 Adam I don't know what was beautiful about it, but...

1:10:14 Drew Pristine, opalescent.

1:10:15 Adam It was wonderful looking.

1:10:17 Drew Enchanting, I think is the word they used.

1:10:19 Adam It inspired many poets to write about my sack. And I didn't know if they were talking to me for my sack or for me. But eventually, I just figured they're talking to me and that's good enough. And since the sack was attached to me, barely, but attached to me, I went with it. Alex?

1:10:41 Drew Yeah?

1:10:42 Adam I think you need to lose a little weight and I bet you those boobs will go down.

1:10:47 Drew Yeah, and don't worry about your back. That's more an issue of the weight, too, here. And you may have had a facet interlocking, you know, problem with the facet dislocation. You may have had a disc that suddenly popped out. I mean, it's all kinds of things that can happen to your back, low back, particularly when you're overweight.

1:11:00 Adam Yeah, and when you're depressed, your back hurts, too.

1:11:03 Drew Yeah, that's true.

1:11:04 Adam Hey, Alex?

1:11:05 Guest Yeah?

1:11:05 Adam How about you get a little diet, a little exercise, and see how your back feels, see if those boobs shrink, and then call us back in six months.

1:11:11 Guest Well, I've lost 10 pounds.

1:11:14 Adam Good. Good.

1:11:15 Guest But nothing's happened to my boobs.

1:11:18 Drew It will.

1:11:19 Guest Okay.

1:11:19 Drew It's a...

1:11:22 Adam You lost 10 pounds? A hoagie fell out of her pocket. How did you lose that 10 pounds?

1:11:28 Guest Well, I wasn't eating as a lot, and I guess I was kind of starving myself.

1:11:33 Adam Good, but don't starve yourself, baby. You know, eat a nice, balanced meal, and you ever watch those Saturday morning cartoons?

1:11:42 Guest What?

1:11:43 Adam Yeah, you know, they got that triangle with the cheese on it, the dairy, and then the cow, and they got the groups there. I don't know who invented those groups. When I was... Did you grow up, Drew? Did you watch those Saturday morning cartoons?

1:12:02 Drew Oh, sure.

1:12:03 Adam There was a whole pitch for cheese on one of those. Do you remember that? No. I'm hankering for a hunk of cheese. It was like a whole cheese wrap. And you talk about how it comes in a wheel. There was some kind of like PSA about eating cheese.

1:12:23 Drew Interesting. Well, it's a protein message.

1:12:25 Caller That's right.

1:12:26 Drew Plus, he fattened, went out of vogue, and so that was the end of that.

1:12:29 Adam I know, but who put that on? The dairy board? I mean, there was some lobbying. There was some palm greasing going on to get that cheese PSA whipped up. They used to talk about healthy snacks, about how to make popsicles and stuff. Do you remember any of that? Take the orange shoes, pour it in an ice cube tray, put some sulfane over it, stick some toothpicks in it. Do we really need that? Just get me back to the goddamn Johnny Sacco so I can go out and beat some ass. Do you know what I mean? I want to see Speed Racer, I want to see Deputy Dogg. I don't care about the talking cheese wheel, but I'll tell you that Schoolhouse Rock taught me more than I'd ever learned in any school.

1:13:13 Drew Remember we had those guys in here?

1:13:16 Adam They were big fat drunken, surrey guys. The guy did the voice, the guy did all the singing for all the Schoolhouse Rock stuff is this big fat alcoholic guy. He's angry and he is surrey. He kind of looks a little like Otis from Mayberry. Remember the lovable wino on Andy Griffith's show? But he's got an edge to him. I don't know if that's booze or he didn't get, I don't know, maybe he got screwed on some asscap deal or something, but he didn't seem happy about the whole thing. The other guy seemed kind of jovial, the guy who wrote this stuff. All right, we will take ourselves a break when we come back and speak to Jennifer who is 20, only gets turned on by watching lesbian porn after this.

1:14:22 Caller You're listening to Loveline on Outrageous Talk Radio. 100.7 The Buzz.

1:14:43 Adam Yep, Loveline. Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. All right, you ready to rock here, Drew? Let's talk to Jennifer. Jennifer? Oh, boy.

1:14:55 Drew Jennifer?

1:14:56 Caller Hello?

1:14:57 Adam You're 20?

1:14:58 Caller Yeah.

1:14:58 Adam You enjoy the lesbian porn?

1:15:00 Caller Yes, I do. Okay, I'm currently with my boyfriend, but the only thing is, the only kind of sex we ever have is, I'm sorry, I'm very nervous. The only kind of sex I have him do to me is the only world because that's the only thing I get off. I really don't even care about the other part.

1:15:18 Adam You don't enjoy that?

1:15:19 Caller Not really.

1:15:20 Drew Don't enjoy it or don't care about it?

1:15:22 Caller I don't care about it. It's like when I'm doing it, it's just like, okay.

1:15:26 Drew Do you dislike it?

1:15:29 Caller Basically, I just sit there and like, okay.

1:15:33 Adam Does it make you uncomfortable though?

1:15:34 Caller Yeah.

1:15:35 Adam Anyone do anything weird to you?

1:15:38 Caller Well, I had a lot of people like when I was between the 13 and 15 when I was like a tweaker.

1:15:45 Drew Tweaking on speed?

1:15:46 Caller Yeah.

1:15:47 Drew Well, that might be part of the problem. Speed leaves some residual effects on the brain.

1:15:51 Adam Well, what did you do? Have sex with a bunch of idiots?

1:15:54 Caller Yeah. And then a bunch of like really old men.

1:15:58 Drew Oh boy.

1:15:58 Adam Guys in their 40s?

1:16:00 Caller Yeah.

1:16:00 Adam When you were like 14?

1:16:02 Caller Yeah.

1:16:02 Drew Something happened to you before you were 14?

1:16:05 Caller No, not, not.

1:16:06 Drew Come on.

1:16:09 Caller Nothing like sexual or anything. I was always left alone all the time.

1:16:13 Adam Yeah. Who are these 40 year olds you're having sex with?

1:16:18 Caller Just dealers, sometimes mostly dealers.

1:16:20 Adam Yeah.

1:16:21 Drew Dealers.

1:16:22 Adam Fantastic guys. Just great individuals.

1:16:26 Drew So you must have had addiction in your family somewhere.

1:16:28 Caller Oh yeah.

1:16:29 Caller Like everybody in my family addicted to something.

1:16:31 Caller Right.

1:16:31 Drew And when they were high on whatever, they didn't never did anything to you, never hit you, never...

1:16:35 Caller Oh no.

1:16:36 Caller Uh-uh.

1:16:37 Adam They just...

1:16:38 Caller It's more like just I got left alone a lot.

1:16:41 Adam They neglected you.

1:16:43 Caller Yeah.

1:16:43 Adam All right. So your vagina fell asleep.

1:16:46 Drew Yeah. Something...

1:16:48 Adam Well, what? You don't buy... I'll buy this.

1:16:51 Drew No. Just like something else happened younger, just to set her up quite soon. It may all be addiction. It can't be addiction.

1:16:56 Caller A lot of it... Well, when I was between 13 and 15, most of it is like from the little man. And then when I was 17, I dated some guy that was 24 years older than I.

1:17:06 Adam All right.

1:17:06 Drew We just wanted to know why the...

1:17:07 Adam Valvola? You're 17 and the guy was 41?

1:17:10 Caller No, no. 24 years older than I.

1:17:13 Drew Wouldn't that be 41?

1:17:14 Caller Yeah. I thought you said 21.

1:17:16 Adam I'm sorry.

1:17:18 Drew Okay.

1:17:18 Adam Well, I'm glad we straightened that out. Someone said you heard the no, no, no. Okay. What... Hold on a second. What the F is up with these guys? No, no, no. I mean, how does that work? You're some 41-year-old guy. You're banging a 17-year-old. You're dealing to some 13, 14-year-old chick. Well, the good news is you'll give her a crank for free if you can get a piece of ass off her. What is it? I mean, I understand they're wretched and they're F'd up, but don't they have to look in the mirror at some point? I mean, how does that work? Are they just that soulless?

1:17:57 Drew Predators.

1:17:58 Adam Yeah, yeah.

1:18:00 Drew People live in this world of denial where they can't look at reality. That's a big thing in our country right now.

1:18:07 Adam Oh my God.

1:18:07 Drew People do not really, and you can't address it with them either. No, no, no, that's the no, no, no part.

1:18:13 Adam Yeah, all right, all right. I really, I would not mind a bullet in the head of every one of these guys. I have zero, zero, zero, zero problem with that.

1:18:25 Drew All right, so Jennifer, you got a lot of major, major crap that went down, right? So it's understandable that it might be very difficult for you to be receptive to a male, that you can still be stimulated sexually, and certainly, you know, you're looking for sort of non-intrusive kinds of interactions, and that's fine. And it's great that you can have that kind of arousal, but actually being open to a male, it's understandable that you'd be pretty closed off to that. Now I want to know why she's not, she's in recovery, is the question here.

1:18:54 Adam All right, all right.

1:18:55 Drew In recovery? You're in recovery?

1:18:58 Caller No, when I'm going up to the university, they have like free psychologists.

1:19:02 Drew Yeah, well, you gotta do that, and you gotta start going to a program. You gotta go to some 12 step program. And in the course of all that work, some of this should start to clear up.

1:19:14 Adam Brad? Yeah. You have 33?

1:19:17 Caller Yes.

1:19:17 Adam What's up?

1:19:19 Caller My 15-year-old boy, I caught him and his stepmother in bed about three and a half, four weeks ago.

1:19:26 Adam Perfectly normal, perfectly healthy? Yeah. No. And his stepmother in bed, be your wife, right?

1:19:34 Drew Yes. Did you know she was kind of messed up?

1:19:37 Caller No, I didn't. I had no idea until this went on. We've only been married for like three and a half months.

1:19:43 Adam Well, let me ask this. I know it's a tragic, horrible situation, but what's wrong with you that you didn't know she was that messed up?

1:19:50 Caller I had no idea. We didn't date for very long. We would seen each other for about six months. And that was about three months after me and my first wife got divorced.

1:19:59 Adam I see.

1:19:59 Drew It's kind of quick, huh?

1:20:01 Caller Yeah.

1:20:02 Adam How old is she?

1:20:03 Caller She's 35.

1:20:04 Adam Oh, she's 35. And how did you catch your son in bed with her?

1:20:10 Caller I come home from work. I work night shift and I come home work about midnight on for a break and I caught them both in my bedroom. And the bad deal is I have no idea what to do. I kicked her out. She's not at the house no more. I don't know what to do about my boy because she is now pregnant and there's no way it's mine because I got fixed about four years ago.

1:20:31 Drew Yeah, but it's not necessarily your son's. I mean, she might be doing some other stuff too.

1:20:35 Adam Yeah, but I'm pretty sure so they what do you do? You give birth. She gives birth to your dad.

1:20:42 Drew How long ago does that work? How long ago did this happen that you found your son with her?

1:20:46 Caller About three and a half, four weeks ago. All right.

1:20:48 Adam Hold on a second. I can talk to Drew. Oh my God. Wait, Christ. No. Listen, the Rams lost and I was this close to hanging myself. This close.

1:20:57 Drew Imagine this.

1:20:58 Adam That's it. What is it? Well, how can people do this? What do you do?

1:21:04 Caller Yeah.

1:21:06 Adam You got the son living over there. You just got married. Well, and by the way, you want to know the number one? Listen to me, you people who are going to screw around. The number one way you get popped is someone coming home from work early or when they shouldn't have. Do you know what I'm saying?

1:21:23 Drew Sure.

1:21:24 Adam That's the number one answer. Every time someone gets caught in bed, what happens? Somebody came home early from work. Brad?

1:21:33 Caller Yes.

1:21:33 Adam Now, what is up that she didn't know your schedule?

1:21:37 Caller Oh, she knows my schedule. It's just I usually don't come home at midnight. I usually just go down to the coffee shop, grab something to drink and then come back to work. But that night, I just happened to go home to grab something.

1:21:47 Adam Yes.

1:21:47 Caller And there they were.

1:21:49 Adam And she says she's pregnant.

1:21:51 Caller Yes, she does.

1:21:52 Drew Well, why?

1:21:52 Caller I don't know what to do with it.

1:21:53 Drew Why are you communicating with her?

1:21:56 Caller Well, I kicked her out as soon as I found her in bed. I told her to pack her s**t out.

1:22:00 Drew And then when did she communicate with you?

1:22:02 Adam Hold on, hold on. He used the s-word there, Drew. We understand he's under some mental duress and so we're going to let it slide. Brad, get him back here, Anderson, would you please? Brad.

1:22:13 Caller Yes.

1:22:13 Adam Okay, so you told her, Pat, now when you let, let's, I know it's painful, but it's also entertaining when you, you come into your home at about midnight, right?

1:22:25 Caller Yeah.

1:22:26 Adam You're having a break. You work graveyard.

1:22:29 Caller Yeah.

1:22:29 Adam What do you do? CPA? Accountant? What do you do?

1:22:32 Caller I work at a...

1:22:33 Adam Tax attorney?

1:22:34 Caller No, I'm a machine shop. I build like buckets for caterpillar. I see. For the motors and stuff.

1:22:40 Adam Right. That's a lot of metal. Yeah. Boy, do you work around metal. All right. So you work at the machine shop, Caterpillar. Where are they at? In Indiana or something? Where are they at?

1:22:52 Caller We got... There's one in Wamego, Kansas, one in Idaho. There's several of them. I'm at one in Wamego, Kansas.

1:23:00 Adam I see. Wamego was going to be my second guess. And you come in the door and... Are you suspicious at first or you just walk in the front door?

1:23:10 Caller I just walk in the front door nonchalantly and go back to the bedroom. I can't remember what. I forgot to grab whatever and open the door and there they are.

1:23:19 Adam They're actually having intercourse at that point.

1:23:22 Caller Yes, they were.

1:23:23 Adam And so you're shocked, you're sickened, you're disgusted. And do they notice you immediately?

1:23:30 Caller Not immediately. About probably 30 seconds afterwards.

1:23:33 Adam Really? That's the other thing that's always crazy about the... Did you have to yell to get them to notice you?

1:23:40 Caller No, they just happened to notice something. I made a noise or something and they seen me and...

1:23:48 Adam You just stood in the door while they had sex.

1:23:51 Caller Yeah, just kind of, you know, just, what the hell. Right. Not able to speak.

1:23:56 Adam Okay, so they notice you and what was their reaction?

1:24:00 Caller They both jumped up and got covered up real quick and my boy kind of rolled off the side of the bed and she just laid there with her eye.

1:24:08 Adam All right. Hey, hold on a second. Brad's on his second use of the S word in about a 45 second span. Let me do the math. Let's see. Over the course of a 24-hour period, 75,000 times he would use the S word over a 24-hour period. Oh, let me do a deduction for eight hours. Yeah, he's going to sleep for eight hours. He's down to 61,000 times.

1:24:37 Caller All right.

1:24:39 Adam Brad.

1:24:40 Caller Yes.

1:24:40 Adam Please, you have to stop saying the S word.

1:24:44 Caller You are an asshole.

1:24:45 Adam Thank you. Now, your boy now, have you punished him?

1:24:51 Caller I don't know what to do about it. No, I have not.

1:24:56 Adam Have you spoken to him?

1:24:58 Caller Yes, I have talked to him about it.

1:24:59 Adam And what did he say?

1:25:01 Caller Nothing really. He just keeps saying, shut up, don't talk about it. And then he go and lock himself in his bedroom. I see. Oh boy.

1:25:08 Drew He's not remorseful or anything?

1:25:10 Adam He hasn't apologized?

1:25:12 Caller No, he has not.

1:25:13 Adam Does he have any reason to be angry at you? Have you ever hit him or anything?

1:25:17 Caller I've never laid a hand on him. I don't believe in spanking or anything like that.

1:25:21 Adam Right. But there's nothing wrong with beating, right?

1:25:24 Caller No.

1:25:24 Drew Whooping, whooping.

1:25:25 Adam All right. So he's just embarrassed and he don't know what to do.

1:25:29 Drew Yeah.

1:25:30 Caller Right.

1:25:30 Adam Does he think he's in love or something?

1:25:33 Caller I hope not.

1:25:34 Adam Well, what I mean is, is, you know, a 15-year-old boy.

1:25:38 Drew Having sex with someone.

1:25:39 Adam Can have some pretty powerful feelings attached to that.

1:25:43 Caller Well, they think they do.

1:25:44 Caller But there's actually there is nothing there.

1:25:46 Drew Yeah, I understand.

1:25:47 Adam I know. But I'm not asking you what's there and what's not there. I'm asking what he thinks is there.

1:25:51 Drew What is he experiencing? That's a valuable point.

1:25:56 Caller He may. Like I said, I have no clue.

1:25:59 Drew You gotta get him some help. He needs a therapist. Seriously, he really needs someone to talk to.

1:26:04 Adam You're gonna have to really... Yeah, things are gonna be hashed out with him so you guys can have some semblance of a relationship.

1:26:11 Drew Well, this is a crossroads for him. I mean, he could really go down an antisocial path from here that would not be one he'd come back from.

1:26:16 Adam Right, okay, so number two, this woman is a piece of work. And, yeah, well, you learned a very tough lesson, but better sooner than later. Now, the question is, is what's she gonna do with this kid?

1:26:32 Caller Exactly, that's what I wanna know. If I turn her in for statutory rape or if I just, I don't know.

1:26:38 Adam How about, how pregnant is she, do you know?

1:26:43 Caller She'd be...

1:26:44 Drew Three and a half weeks.

1:26:45 Caller Three and a half, four weeks, yeah.

1:26:46 Adam Well, they could have been having something, some affair that's been going on for a while.

1:26:51 Caller Yeah.

1:26:52 Adam You think that's been going on for a while? Probably.

1:26:56 Drew Probably.

1:26:57 Adam I know, I know, but this could have been going on for a couple of months, right?

1:27:00 Caller Yeah, I ain't gonna say no, but...

1:27:03 Drew Okay, all right.

1:27:04 Adam So she could be a month pregnant.

1:27:07 Caller Yeah.

1:27:08 Adam Okay, so here's what you do, Brad. You tell her that either she gets an abortion or you turn her in.

1:27:18 Drew Okay.

1:27:18 Adam That's it. She's got to get the abortion. You give birth to your uncle or grandfather. I haven't figured that one out yet.

1:27:26 Caller Yeah, let's try this.

1:27:27 Adam The point is, is she needs an abortion, and if she doesn't get the abortion, which she should want to have, except for she's insane, if she doesn't want to, you tell her you will go to the police immediately.

1:27:42 Caller Okay.

1:27:43 Adam All right? All right. See if that works. Then you get your kid into some therapy and you try to rekindle the relationship with your child. Forget all about this crazy bitch. Here's the craziest thing about people who cheat, especially in that inner family circle of cheating. It's the don't use protection part of it. He said he was fixed, right?

1:28:07 Caller Yeah.

1:28:07 Adam Didn't he say that?

1:28:08 Caller Yeah.

1:28:09 Adam Yeah. So when you got a husband, by the way, ladies, here's a little cheatin tip for you. When you got a husband who's had his tubes tied, basically, what do they call it? It's nuts carterized. When your husband cannot get anyone pregnant and you're gonna be cheating, you make damn sure you don't get pregnant because that's one of the ways he might be tipped off. You know what I mean? And if you're gonna bang someone in the family, stepson, perhaps, cousin, uncle, someone like that, be damn sure you don't get pregnant. But it's like saying nuts on nuts, right? And this is nuts is nuts. It's not nuts on nuts.

1:28:54 Drew That's right.

1:28:54 Adam Right? She's crazy enough to bang her 15-year-old stepson. She's crazy enough not to use protection.

1:28:59 Drew Nuts does as nuts is. That's right.

1:29:03 Adam All right. Nuts is as nuts does. That's what mommy used to tell me.

1:29:06 Drew Yeah. All right.

1:29:07 Adam We'll take ourselves a break. When we come back, we're going to talk to Rachel. Rachel's 15 dating a guy that is 25 after this.

1:29:17 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:29:37 Caller 100.7, The Buzz.

1:29:50 Adam Oh, man, I'm eating some lemon cake. Boys, this is good. What's the best fruit for dessert, Drew? I've had this argument with many people.

1:30:00 Drew Best fruit for dessert?

1:30:02 Adam Fruit that turns into a dessert flavor. You factor in pie, pudding, ice cream. It's tough.

1:30:11 Drew Yeah.

1:30:11 Adam Cake. I'll tell you what, I'll tell you. I put my money on banana.

1:30:16 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:30:17 Adam That's me. I go banana.

1:30:19 Drew Anderson, you go banana. Strawberry's got to be up there somewhere.

1:30:21 Adam Strawberry's around. Strawberry's kind of good on its own.

1:30:25 Drew Yeah.

1:30:26 Adam Banana cake. Pear. Pear.

1:30:30 Drew Apple.

1:30:31 Adam How dare you with that pear. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. Pear. Pear's the worst.

1:30:38 Caller I beg your pardon.

1:30:41 Drew Apple. Peach.

1:30:42 Adam No, no. Peach. Peach is good. Hey, don't get me wrong. I love a peach on its own. And I love a peach pie. But peach, peach ice cream, peach bread. No. Now you gotta go banana. That's where the smart money is. All you gamblers. You put your money on banana. Lemon's good, but it's just lemon cake. Lemon ice cream's no good. Lemon meringue pie's good, though.

1:31:11 Caller Peach is good, cause it's sweet, but it's not tart.

1:31:14 Adam Peach is, peach is nice, Anderson. I'm with you with the peach. I'm the kind of guy, by the way, gets angry when people don't like the fruit I like. You ever do that? We're like, you know, people go like, you go, so you'd be sitting around and be going, what do you think the best fruit is? And you think for a long while and you go, nothing better than a Bing cherry. Big bowl of in-season Bing cherry.

1:31:34 Drew Oh, I hate that.

1:31:34 Adam And then some A-hole pipes up and goes, I like a Pippen apple. And you go, well, sure, in a pinch. No, no, I like apple. Wait a minute, do you want to eat an apple over a big bowl of cherries? Yeah, I prefer an apple, like, get the F out of here. Get out of here, you make me sick. I'm gonna hear people take the peach over the nectarine. They sicken me. Everyone knows a nectarine is better than a peach. Sam, but nectarine, not a good dessert food.

1:32:03 Guest Hi.

1:32:03 Adam Banana, that makes a nice transition, nice and smooth. Do you hear me, Sam?

1:32:09 Guest What's up, Sam? Hi, Adam?

1:32:10 Adam Yeah.

1:32:11 Guest Oh, hi, Adam. I love you. Dr. Drew, you're cool.

1:32:14 Adam Yeah.

1:32:14 Drew What's up, Sam?

1:32:15 Adam I'm into you too, baby.

1:32:17 Guest Okay. Like two and a half weeks ago, I came home and like my brother came home and he was like wasted and drunk and like we really have been close like lately and I gave him like head and I had sex with him.

1:32:32 Drew He's your biological brother?

1:32:33 Guest Yeah.

1:32:34 Adam Perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

1:32:36 Drew Now, why would you sexualize your feelings like that?

1:32:40 Guest I don't know, because like at school I'm not that like popular, but like.

1:32:44 Drew Yeah, but what happened in your past that would cause you to sort of turn feelings of intimacy into sexual feelings?

1:32:51 Guest Well, my mom's an alcoholic mother.

1:32:54 Adam Yeah, not good enough.

1:32:56 Drew Did she physically abuse you or do anything weird to you?

1:32:58 Guest Not really.

1:32:59 Drew How about your dad or anybody she brought home?

1:33:03 Guest He was like never there. He left.

1:33:07 Drew And were there other men that came in the house after he left?

1:33:10 Guest Not really.

1:33:11 Adam What about the sparklet guy? You ever come in or the Orchid Man?

1:33:15 Guest Occasionally.

1:33:17 Adam I see. Write that down, Drew. Got it. Colgan Man came by once. Hey, Sam?

1:33:23 Guest Yeah?

1:33:23 Adam Your brother is how old?

1:33:25 Guest He's 16.

1:33:27 Adam And he came home loaded.

1:33:31 Guest And now I think I'm pregnant.

1:33:36 Adam I'm so disgusted that I'm this close to stopping my eating.

1:33:41 Drew But you won't have to worry.

1:33:42 Adam No, I'm not going to stop.

1:33:44 Drew This is serious stuff, right?

1:33:45 Adam Oh, my God.

1:33:46 Drew Do you understand that?

1:33:48 Adam Yeah.

1:33:48 Drew Yeah. And that the fact that this happened sort of says things about your... the way you're made up, the way your emotional state. There's a lot to deal with here with the potential pregnancy. And this is something you need some professional intervention, OK?

1:34:04 Adam No, no, no, no. Wait.

1:34:05 Guest OK, but like, what should I do?

1:34:07 Adam I'm going to tell you what you need to do. First off, I know I gave this speech just a few moments ago when I I never thought I'd have a job or had to make this claim on the air. But when having sex with a family member, it's important to use protection.

1:34:24 Drew Nice.

1:34:25 Adam I as the theme from Taboo 2 comes in. I cannot stress that strongly enough. Always either pull out or use or use a form of contraception.

1:34:39 Drew Pull out is not good enough.

1:34:41 Guest Well, he pulled out.

1:34:42 Adam Oh, okay. All right. Who says chivalry is dead?

1:34:46 Drew How long ago did this happen?

1:34:47 Guest This is two and a half weeks ago.

1:34:50 Drew Right.

1:34:50 Adam So, Sam, let me just get this straight one more time. You're 13. You would be in the seventh grade.

1:34:56 Guest Yeah.

1:34:57 Adam I see. And what month were you in? So you're just in the seventh grade, right?

1:35:02 Guest Yeah. Well, it's like, yeah.

1:35:04 Drew Halfway.

1:35:04 Adam You're getting to the halfway point. And what was that?

1:35:10 Guest The radio went on real quick. Yeah.

1:35:14 Drew All right.

1:35:14 Guest Acceptable.

1:35:15 Adam You're and your older brother's what? In the 10th or 11th grade?

1:35:19 Guest Yeah, he's in the 11th.

1:35:21 Adam He came home and you gave him oral sex. And then you had intercourse with him.

1:35:26 Guest Yeah.

1:35:27 Adam But he was good enough to pull out. So he scores big points. And now you think you're pregnant. And what, why did you have sex? I mean, why did you think that was okay? Did he rape you?

1:35:45 Guest No, it just, it just felt right.

1:35:47 Drew Was it his idea?

1:35:50 Guest Sort of.

1:35:51 Drew So I wonder if he was abused maybe. Because, you know, kids, the older kids will act out in the younger ones. So she sort of.

1:35:57 Adam Yeah.

1:35:57 Guest He was like drinking everything.

1:35:58 Drew Yeah, I understand.

1:36:00 Adam Yeah. I've been drunk around my sister and we always stop at second base. I mean, that's that's the Carolla policy right there. We get liquored up. She's been lit up pretty good. And of course, there's the attraction. But we always stop at second.

1:36:16 Drew But you have to find some Sam some help for this, right? It's important. This is serious stuff.

1:36:22 Adam So and in Sam, nobody sexually abused you.

1:36:27 Guest No.

1:36:28 Adam And nobody beat you. And you don't have a brain tumor or anything like that.

1:36:35 Guest No.

1:36:36 Adam And what's up with you? I mean, have you do guys, the boys not give you attention?

1:36:44 Guest No, they do. But they're like all dorks.

1:36:47 Adam I see. Not cool like your brother?

1:36:49 Guest Sure.

1:36:50 Drew Oof.

1:36:53 Adam You walked into that one, Sam.

1:36:54 Drew I mean, she may not have been pure victim until this guy got a hold of her. You know what I mean? I mean, she's had the abuse of mom, alcohol, mom, dad, the lab.

1:37:02 Adam Is this the first encounter you've had with your brother?

1:37:05 Guest Yeah.

1:37:06 Adam And you're not gonna do it again, are you?

1:37:09 Guest No.

1:37:10 Adam Why not?

1:37:11 Guest Because, like, I think I'm pregnant, so that would stop.

1:37:15 Adam Right. But let's say you weren't pregnant. Would you do it again?

1:37:20 Guest Um, I don't know. It wasn't... I don't... I didn't like it or anything.

1:37:24 Adam You didn't like it?

1:37:25 Guest No.

1:37:26 Adam That's good. And... but don't you have feelings about it, other than just not liking it? Doesn't it feel kind of strange, kind of bad?

1:37:34 Guest Not really.

1:37:35 Drew Kind of weird?

1:37:35 Adam The fact that this is your brother doesn't feel strange to you?

1:37:38 Guest Oh, yeah, that.

1:37:39 Adam Oh, that. Okay.

1:37:40 Drew All right.

1:37:42 Adam Yeah. It's easy to overlook that part. I remember when I was...

1:37:46 Drew Oh, you mean that part of it.

1:37:47 Adam I was macking out with my mom once, and it felt pretty natural for a moment. Until? Well, then I saw the pictures of me on Santa's lap that she had up on the mantle there, and it got weird. Yeah, after I started thinking about it. From that angle? Yeah, that. Yeah, that felt weird. Yeah. That's it. Hey, Sam? Yeah? It's, I'm really, I'm kind of disturbed that you're not more disturbed about this whole thing. You know what I mean? This is a very unnatural thing. This should be something that, for most people, it is not in their vocabulary. They're unable to do it.

1:38:23 Drew On some level, it must feel funny. And why you don't?

1:38:26 Guest Well, yeah, it does.

1:38:29 Drew Yeah, and why you are having those feelings is bothersome to us. And you need to get help dealing with those feelings.

1:38:35 Adam Can you go to Planned Parenthood? Or can you go to Bethesda, Maryland, where the Naval Hospital is? Is there something to throw yourself on the doorstep? I mean, what can she do, Drew?

1:38:46 Drew You need help. You've gotta find help.

1:38:48 Adam What do you mean, gotta find help?

1:38:50 Drew Listen, I don't care if it's a family doctor, if it's Planned Parenthood, if it's a school counselor, some adult that is a professional trained, that you lay this on them, and in your community nearby and get this thing underway, because this is heavy stuff. And if you can't, I would suggest you call Child Protective Services. I have another number called Child Help USA, 800-422-4453. We also have 800-540-4000.

1:39:17 Adam Don't give her the other number. That's too confusing, man. You give her the tune number.

1:39:20 Drew 800-442-4453.

1:39:24 Adam All right.

1:39:24 Drew We'll foster proximate ation.

1:39:25 Adam I belched there. We'll be back.

1:39:28 Caller Hello, this is your radio.

1:39:53 Adam Yeah, I'm ready to do another show, Drew. What do you say, buddy?

1:39:57 Drew Yeah, good enough. We'll get to do one in about 22 hours.

1:39:59 Adam I got my batteries charged. I'm ready to party. All right, we will take ourselves a little break, but I promise...

1:40:04 Drew I think it's that lemon pie, the lemon cake you ate. I think I did something to do. Why? Tomorrow, I'd start out with the lemon cake, right? We did the top of the show.

1:40:12 Adam So solid.

1:40:13 Drew Yeah.

1:40:14 Adam All right, we're going to take ourselves an extended 22-hour break, and we'll be back with a more fantabulous show tomorrow night. So until then, this is Adam Corolla, with Dr. Drew saying mahalo. I remember when I blew my uncle in high school. It was one of the worst days of my life.

1:40:29 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Monday, December 18, 2000