1:02
Voiceover
Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, coast to coast.
1:13
Hey, hey, hey.
1:15
It is Loveline.
1:17
Voiceover
Phone number, 1-800-LOVE-191, facts number. Although I've not seen a fax in six months. Oh, it's broken. That's right.
1:26
Well, forget that.
1:26
Drew
Yeah, why bother?
1:28
Adam
Hey, Anderson with the still broken.
1:30
Drew
It's out of paper.
1:31
I have no idea how to do it.
1:32
Drew
Oh, that's a stretch. Let's figure out how to put paper in the fax machine.
1:36
Adam
You want to come do it, Drew?
1:37
Drew
I'm just saying, it's a high-tech facility here. I'm not blaming you, certainly.
1:41
Adam
No, not Anderson. But I do blame Anderson for the first answer, which is still broken, still broken, out of paper. So like a vending machine that's out of peanuts is broken or out of peanuts?
1:55
Maybe out of peanuts. But I mean, it was all like hate facts.
1:57
Drew
Oh, you're sick too, huh? You've been sick?
2:00
Adam
Anderson's great. Anderson's, Anderson's backup is, it was just a bunch of negative stuff that would have brought you down anyway.
2:06
Drew
All right.
2:06
Adam
So I'm fine. Okay, sara, sara. I gave the phone number, so forget about the fax number. I'm Adam Corolla. And tonight we have a very special guest in studio for Rare Appearance, Dr. Drew. Now, you are a physician, right? Psychologist? No, physician.
2:23
Drew
Love doctor.
2:23
Adam
Love doctor. You work with kids.
2:26
Drew
How is Bruce?
2:26
Adam
I've seen your show on MTV. You are also, you know about addiction medicine.
2:32
Drew
This is good. You prep for my interview as much as you prep for anybody else's. I appreciate that.
2:36
Adam
All right. Well, it's good to have you in the studio. You're going to stay the whole two hours?
2:39
Drew
You know, didn't they tell you to leave me out the first hour?
2:41
Adam
I didn't. And it's not here and I didn't talk to your publicist.
2:44
Drew
Okay, sorry.
2:44
Adam
Just the first hour?
2:45
Drew
Yeah.
2:46
Adam
You're doing Good Morning on Good Morning LA.
2:48
Drew
KTLA.
2:49
Adam
KTLA tomorrow morning. You got to get out here. I understand. Well, Dr. Drew, first to go by his first name, Drew, your first name?
2:55
Drew
Yeah.
2:55
Adam
Drew will be with us here tonight in studio.
2:59
Whoa!
3:00
Adam
So, any questions?
3:01
Oh, my God! Somebody hold the phones.
3:04
I can't believe that.
3:06
Adam
So, if there's any questions for Dr. Drew, now is the time to get them in.
3:10
Drew
Tell me about Bruce. How did it go?
3:11
Adam
Bruce, Dr. Spaz?
3:13
Drew
Oh, did you abuse him again?
3:14
I've had anal sex and I passed out a couple of times. Oh!
3:18
Adam
We left the mic hot during the commercial. He was sort of confiding in me.
3:23
Drew
You crammed it. You killed him.
3:24
Adam
We taped that. Bruce and I did... Well, first off, Dr. Bruce and I did more socializing in the five days he was here than the five years you and I have known each other. Bruce came over to my house twice. Oh, wow! Once to nap, the other to eat and take a tour of the house. The party house? No, to my house. And the one I currently live in. And we went to the Super Bowl of Motocross Saturday night.
3:52
Drew
Wow.
3:53
Adam
Dr. Spaz was there. He was in full effect. As a matter of fact, one of his pagers is floating around my car right now.
4:00
Drew
Nice. Why is he Dr. Spaz?
4:02
Adam
Why is he Dr. Spaz? You've seen him. You know, Dr. Spaz. I mean, is there a better name for him? Listen, I was talking to Dr. Bruce about why he was Dr. Spaz. And I said, listen, there's certain titles that fit certain guys like blowhard. You cannot be black and be a blowhard.
4:21
Drew
Right.
4:22
Adam
You cannot be Hispanic and be a blowhard. There's no Asian blowhard.
4:26
Drew
Right.
4:26
Adam
Maybe if you go to China, they have an Asian, you know, within that culture, but not here.
4:31
Drew
Right.
4:31
Adam
Blowhard, white guy, right? Fat, right? Fat. Our manager fits the criteria of a blowhard. He's a wonderful human being, but I'm saying-
4:40
Drew
Actually, he's not plethoric enough. He'd be red and puffy.
4:45
Adam
He can turn red when he gets going. The point is, in order to be a blowhard, you have to be between the age of 42 and 62. In the 60s, you need to be at least 40 pounds overweight.
4:56
Drew
Or at least.
4:56
Adam
And you have to be white.
4:58
Drew
Yeah.
4:58
Adam
That's what makes a blowhard. Now, a spaz.
5:02
Drew
Spaz usually is like a young kid, though.
5:04
Adam
Spaz, you have to be spindly.
5:06
Drew
Yes.
5:06
Adam
You have to be sort of herky-jerky in your movement.
5:09
Drew
I wish I could have been there during this discussion. Bruce, let me tell you why you're a spaz.
5:13
Adam
Red hair.
5:13
Drew
I mean, poor Bruce. Any sense of how your, the things you say impact on other people?
5:18
Adam
No, I don't think about that.
5:19
Drew
No, I know that.
5:19
Adam
Red hair is good for spaz. There's not many, there's no black spazes. There's not many like Italian spazes. Good to have, good to be of an Irish or Nordic descent to be a spaz. Good to be skinny.
5:31
Drew
Urkel was kind of a spaz.
5:33
Adam
Bony elbows, bony knees. Urkel was, yeah, Urkel was as close as black gets to spaz. But he was still more of a geek, which I think you can do. But spaz is a white guy. Okay. Now would you, who do you know who's more spaz-y than Dr. Bruce?
5:49
Drew
By your definition, Bruce.
5:50
Adam
Yes, he is a spaz. But he joined us Saturday night in Anaheim. We watched Jeremy McGrath. He'll be coming on this show in a few weeks. When the first race of the AMA Supercross Series, we went back into Jeremy's new trailer.
6:03
Drew
Did you see his new 1-800-Collect commercial?
6:05
Adam
I saw his new 1-800-Collect. I talked to Jeremy's dad for a while. Dr. Spaz took some pictures with his digital camera. This is another thing that makes you Dr. Spaz, when you bring the digital camera to the Super Bowl. And then we once saw Jeremy's movie afterward and the whole night in the yard.
6:23
Drew
Was Ray with you?
6:24
Adam
No.
6:25
Drew
I was going to say.
6:26
Adam
We had the rest of the guys, though. The Whee's and Chris was there and all the boys, we all, they were thick as thieves by the end of the night. Boys and Dr. Spaz had a red bowl and vodka and passed out on the sofa while we were watching the movie.
6:41
Drew
Nice.
6:42
Adam
So big night and last night he came over for some Thai food.
6:45
Drew
After the show?
6:46
Adam
No, before the show and we carpooled over here.
6:49
Drew
I hope you don't expect any of that from me.
6:51
Adam
I absolutely do not. Francesca?
6:55
Drew
Yeah.
6:55
Adam
You're 16.
6:56
Caller
14.
6:57
Drew
Oh, 14.
6:58
Adam
That's right. What's up?
7:00
Caller
Well, I was in my room like masquerading and well, I had the blankets over me, but like my mom walked in, but like I was quick enough to like, you know, like move my hand. So I don't think she really like saw what happened, but you know, she's just been like acting really weird now.
7:19
Adam
Well, is she acting weird or do you think she's acting weird because of what you know?
7:26
Caller
Yeah, I think she's acting weird.
7:28
Drew
You think she's acting weird. Let's put the emphasis on who thinks who's acting weird. She thinks she's projecting this or her behavior is making mom act weird. In other words, Francesca is so freaked out that mom was like, hey, what's going on?
7:40
Adam
Well, what does she think you're doing? Taking a nap?
7:43
Caller
Well, like, you know, it's like, listen, listen.
7:46
Adam
I want to know what she would have thought. Hold on.
7:49
Caller
Well, like, when she caught me, it was like, you know, like around 9 o'clock.
7:55
Drew
At night?
7:55
Caller
Yeah.
7:56
Adam
Yeah.
7:57
Caller
And so, like, you know, I usually just, like, you know, just hang out in my room, listen to the radio or whatever.
8:02
Adam
And the lights were on?
8:04
Caller
Yeah.
8:04
Adam
And was the radio on?
8:06
Caller
Yeah.
8:07
Adam
All right. She doesn't want to believe you're doing it. Right.
8:10
Drew
Parents have such high levels of denial about this. It has to be just, you have to crash through their denial or they ain't going to see it. It has to be so obvious they cannot deny it to themselves. Otherwise, they're going to go, oh, it's nothing. I just thought I saw something.
8:22
Adam
My parents, interestingly enough, with the denial thing only started after I became successful.
8:28
Drew
I thought they denied you'd been born.
8:30
Adam
No, they accepted that. Now they deny the fact that I'm literally a millionaire. But Francesca, she doesn't know anything. And if she did know, she doesn't want to know.
8:39
Drew
And if she's freaked out by that, that's her stuff. You're not doing anything.
8:42
Adam
You're fine. You had the radio going. You're a girl. You're 14. She doesn't know anything. OK.
8:49
Caller
OK, Adam.
8:50
Adam
Yes.
8:50
Caller
I love you.
8:51
Adam
I love you. Were you thinking of me when you were, you know, with yourself?
8:55
Caller
Of course.
8:55
Adam
Why? All right. That's good. That's why whenever I used to masturbate in high school, I'd always keep a harmonica near me because it looks suspicious when you're under the covers, especially like me, when my boots are hanging out from underneath the cover. And I pretend like I'm sleeping. But if you have a harmonica, it's like you're doing something in bed.
9:15
Drew
Not a flashlight, not a book, a candy.
9:18
Adam
My parents wouldn't have believed me.
9:19
Caller
You're right.
9:21
Adam
Really?
9:21
It's only me.
9:24
Drew
I hope Bruce gives you a proper rash of ass.
9:26
Adam
No, he can't. He stutters too much. He can't get it out. Buck?
9:31
Yeah.
9:32
Adam
Buck, you're 21. What's up?
9:33
Caller
Yeah. I woke up the other morning and I had an erection, a morning wood.
9:40
Drew
Shocking.
9:41
Caller
Yeah.
9:41
Drew
Let me get this straight. You got a note, Pat, here, Adam?
9:44
Adam
He's saying in the morning when he woke up as a 21-year-old male, he had an erection.
9:48
Whoa!
9:49
Adam
Get the medical community to study him.
9:52
Caller
But Adam, it lasted for 10 hours. It wouldn't go down.
9:55
Adam
Damn, bitch!
9:56
Drew
Do you want any medication?
9:59
Caller
Yeah.
9:59
Drew
What medication?
10:00
Caller
I take Prozac and Trazodone.
10:03
Drew
The Trazodone can do this more so than the Prozac. If you look at your Trazodone package insert, it'll talk about priapism, which is a painful sustained erection. How much Trazodone have you taken?
10:14
Caller
100 to 150 milligrams a night.
10:18
Drew
Had you taken a larger dose that night?
10:20
Caller
No.
10:21
Drew
All right. You got it. Don't take it tonight. Go ahead and take your Prozac, but talk to the doctor that's been prescribing it, because it actually can be kind of a serious side effect. And don't be embarrassed to talk about it. It is really important that you talk to him.
10:32
Adam
You're talking about the package insert, that thing that's written on microfilm?
10:35
Drew
Yeah, for attorneys.
10:36
Adam
Where you have to use a jeweler's loop to find out what the dosage is.
10:42
Drew
Yes, and in fact, if he wants to find the side effect, he can scroll through my favorite part, where it's sort of broken down by organ system, skin, respiratory, cardiovascular, with about 60 different side effects in each organ system listed.
10:55
Adam
What percentage of people who get the medication read that side effect list?
11:01
Drew
A lot do, unfortunately. No, they don't. Yeah, they do. And then they can't put it in any kind of context. It's just a scary list.
11:07
Adam
Nobody reads that.
11:08
Drew
Well, I can tell you, in my world...
11:10
Adam
Well, your world, your world of 110-year-old Jews who paid you because their filling came out. Please.
11:19
Drew
That people read inserts? It's good that they do, but they don't have a frame of reference.
11:23
Adam
I don't condone reading. I believe it poisons the mind. John?
11:27
Drew
Adam, I was thinking about you.
11:28
Adam
You're 28.
11:28
Caller
Yes. How are you guys doing?
11:30
Adam
Good.
11:31
Caller
Good. Welcome back, Dr. Drew, by the way.
11:34
Drew
Thank you, John.
11:36
Caller
I have a question. I have a history of depression in my family, and my mom, she passed away last year from emphysema. Hold on.
11:50
Adam
Drew socked the mic at 10 minutes and 47 seconds into the show in his personal best.
11:55
Drew
That's 49 seconds, 48 minutes and 10 seconds before the top of the arm.
11:57
Adam
That's right.
11:59
Caller
Sorry, guys.
12:00
Adam
Did you let something go in there?
12:01
Drew
No, this is smell addiction in this mix. Really?
12:05
Adam
I thought you broke wind.
12:06
Drew
No. But...
12:07
Adam
All right. Go ahead, John.
12:09
Caller
But anyway, I have a hard time trusting psychiatrists or therapists and stuff like that. My mom had been through psychiatric treatment since I was a little kid. She had a bunch of ECTs and shock therapy and all kinds of stuff. She had pneumonia when she had overdosed on psoriasis. Anyway, I have a hard time trusting.
12:45
Adam
Alright, so get over it, would you?
12:48
Caller
What I'm saying is that I have trouble with depression too.
12:54
Drew
My instincts suggest that there may be some alcoholism or something here too.
13:01
Caller
In the family or in you?
13:03
Drew
You and the family.
13:04
Caller
Oh yeah, it runs rampant.
13:06
Drew
How the hell do I know that?
13:09
Adam
Because he sounds like Otis from the Andy Griffiths show.
13:14
Drew
But here's what I'm going to suggest to you, that a more effective perhaps move for you and one that sort of gets around the whole psychiatric care system is go directly to a recovery program. Get an AA, call AA, have somebody come pick you up, go to some meetings, start bonding up with people who have the same stuff you have.
13:32
Caller
Well, I was in the program for six years.
13:34
Drew
Well, get back, make your old contacts, make some outreach calls and get back involved. You got it. Listen, you called, I immediately knew it was addiction.
13:41
Adam
Yeah.
13:42
Drew
You can't deal with any other psychiatric problems, particularly not depression until the addiction is treated adequately. To get back in the program and magically the depression may go away. If it doesn't, you'll have plenty of support there, you'll have direction from your sponsor and you'll have the ability with that support to go get the proper care.
13:58
Adam
All right. So now we're going to talk to Dan. What's that? Dan? Dan is what? 30? What's that say?
14:05
Drew
30 we.
14:06
Adam
Why does it say that, Dan?
14:08
Caller
Hey, how's it going, guys?
14:09
Adam
Good. Are you 30?
14:10
Caller
Yes, sir.
14:11
Adam
All right. What's up?
14:13
Caller
Don't know if it's a problem, but on my 30th birthday, my beautiful young woman friend took me to a bar and got into it and we kind of passed it back and forth just rather playfully.
14:31
Drew
Wait, wait, wait. I'm lost for some reason.
14:33
Caller
All right.
14:34
Drew
Who took you to a strip bar?
14:35
Caller
My girlfriend, my fiancee to be sort of seen.
14:38
Drew
And you had a lap dance that you went back and forth with?
14:41
Caller
Yeah. We actually spent about three hours there and enjoyed ourselves, had a couple of bottles of wine, really kind of just enjoyed the evening. It was rather cool. And she kind of really got into it actually.
14:57
Drew
Yeah.
14:57
Caller
It was pretty cool.
14:58
Adam
Did you say you both got lap dances?
15:01
Caller
Yes, sir.
15:02
Adam
From the same person?
15:03
Caller
Yeah, actually. We ended up spending most of the evening with one girl.
15:07
Adam
Did you get like a simultaneous lap dance?
15:09
Drew
Yeah. How does that work?
15:11
Caller
Well, actually the dancer herself was rather professional about it. She had Carrie sit on my lap and then she danced with both of us, if you will.
15:26
Adam
Yeah. I don't know if I like that buffer between the stripper's ass and my crotch, you know? Drew doesn't know what a lap dance is. There are claims not to know.
15:39
Caller
An extended lap. All right.
15:40
Adam
So anyway, now what? You want to three some?
15:43
Caller
Well, yeah.
15:45
Adam
And what's your girlfriend think?
15:47
Caller
See, that's just it. She is, she again was pretty open to the whole concept and I know that introducing a third party in any situation can be extraordinarily dangerous as opposed to just going in blindly. Just some basic advice on...
16:05
Get two chicks in the same bed.
16:07
Caller
Do them.
16:08
Drew
Yeah.
16:08
Caller
All right.
16:09
Adam
Listen, Dan?
16:10
Caller
Yes, sir.
16:11
Adam
Who was that?
16:11
Drew
Ron Lester.
16:12
Adam
Oh, it was?
16:13
Caller
Oh, yeah. It was.
16:14
Drew
Speaking of... No, Ron's not a blowhard, though.
16:16
Caller
He just looks like a blowhard.
16:17
Adam
He will be in 10 years. He's got his ID changed. He'll be a blowhard. Dan? Yes, sir. You think you're going to marry this woman? Yes, sir. All right.
16:27
Drew
Don't do it.
16:27
Adam
It's going to cause trouble.
16:28
Drew
Don't do it.
16:28
Caller
It's not going to be worth it.
16:31
Drew
As close to the edge as you want to go is what you guys did. That's fine. Even that's going to eventually create a little tension. It is. It just has to. Don't violate boundaries. Don't put your relationships in risky situations. Unless you're just experimenting, you don't care. Fine. Enjoy.
16:48
Adam
Yeah.
16:50
Drew
I get accused of being a party pooper and conservative and stuff. My thing is I wish we lived in a world where people could have threesomes and people could do ecstasy every day and enjoy it. Have a great time.
17:00
Adam
Yeah.
17:00
Drew
The fact is...
17:02
Adam
That's San Fernando Valley. Yeah.
17:04
Drew
That's what people do.
17:05
Adam
Right.
17:05
Drew
But I wish it was a world they could do it and remain healthy and remain intact and keep their brains working normally. It doesn't work like that. It destroys relationships, the threesomes, and ecstasy destroys your brain and pot has its own side. I mean, this is just the way it is.
17:17
Adam
Well, listen, I had a very interesting conversation today with my partner, Jimmy Kimmel.
17:25
Drew
About your threesome?
17:26
Adam
Big Tad and Gary, my idiot, Savant Carpenter, who works for me. Very heady conversation over some pizza at Jimmy's house today. And we were talking about days of yore and pornography and how excited we were when, on a weekend, when we were 14, 15 years old, we knew some show was coming on cable. I remember the movie The Betsy. You remember that movie?
17:52
Drew
No, I forget. No, no, no, I do, actually.
17:54
Adam
You do remember the movie The Betsy.
17:56
Drew
Yeah. I don't remember why I was into it.
17:57
Adam
I don't even remember what it was about, but I knew it had a brief boob scene in it, somewhere in the middle of this three-hour movie.
18:03
Drew
How about Billy Jack?
18:06
Adam
We were talking about Billy Jack at length last night.
18:08
Drew
Yeah. You'd wait. I mean, I think what you'd go through to get to see that film.
18:12
Adam
She got raped by the river. It was great. Yeah. I saw it when I was eight with my mom and her hippie friends in a theater.
18:18
Drew
No, no.
18:19
Adam
Oh, yes.
18:20
Drew
Oh, my God.
18:21
Adam
Go ahead and cheat.
18:21
Drew
Is that before or after Papillon?
18:24
Adam
Probably the same week. But what I'm saying is, we were talking about how exciting it was back then, the thrill of the hunt, that there was going to be some nudity. On Monday, I was excited that on Friday, I was going to catch the side glimpse of a boob as a chick jumped from the pool before she got into her bathrobe in the Betsy. And it was exciting to me. Now, I have a mountain of pornography in my bunker and it doesn't do that much. Not as much excitement as it was back then. And then, now quiet down, Drew, because I know you want to talk, but just hold your tongue there. Then we were talking about hunting. And we said, what's fun about hunting? I mean, if they took an elk and they chained it to a fence and you stood next to it and shot it with a pistol, it wouldn't be anything. Yeah. It would be considered cruel and unfun. What is it? It's the fact that you're sitting out in the woods for hours and hours and hours. Anticipation of a moment that may or may not arise. And that is the exciting part. It's the same with all these sexual fantasies. The fantasy part is the exciting part. You planning it out and actually doing it, isn't always going to be a disappointment. Not all. Oh no, you're right. You're right. That's retarded logic. You're right.
19:38
Caller
No, you're right.
19:39
Adam
We should have threesomes. I think I have a tumor.
19:45
Caller
You're right.
19:45
Drew
I haven't gone too long.
19:46
Caller
Threesomes is good.
19:48
Adam
You're right. No, threesomes is good.
19:50
Drew
Remember the movie Straw Dogs?
19:51
Adam
Yes, I saw it. Dustin Hoffman?
19:53
Drew
That was the other one.
19:54
Adam
No, not Straw Dogs. That was The Wicker Man.
19:55
Drew
No, Straw Dogs. Straw Dogs had a scene like that. I remember people talking about it for weeks after somebody having gone to see it.
20:01
Adam
What year was Straw Dogs?
20:03
Drew
Here's the 74.
20:04
Adam
Okay, listen, we're going to yell that.
20:05
Drew
But here's the even more strange thing is that it's still, even thinking about going to see Billy Jack or whatever the hell his movie is, it still has a sense of excitement and arousal associated with it for you that for the 14-year-olds today, they'd be like what? What is this?
20:20
Adam
So what's the moral of this story?
20:21
Drew
We're lame.
20:22
Adam
If you're going to marry this chick, don't have the threesome. It's not going to be good down the road.
20:27
Caller
Or if you really care about the relationship.
20:29
Adam
Lindsay, you're 17.
20:30
Caller
Yes.
20:30
Adam
What's up?
20:31
Caller
Hi, how are you?
20:31
Adam
Good. Good.
20:32
Caller
First of all, Adam, you're my savior.
20:34
Adam
Thank you.
20:35
Caller
And you're very, very hot.
20:37
Adam
You're wonderful.
20:38
Caller
Thank you.
20:42
Caller
My question was, since you're the self-proclaimed mayor of Boobville, what exactly is the role that Minka, the number one Asian big boob queen, has in your town?
20:50
Caller
Number one, Asian big boob queen.
20:53
Caller
Hot pitches.
20:54
Adam
She would be, she would read all the proclamations that I sent down.
20:59
Number one.
21:01
Adam
She would sit there with a scroll and a big feather in her cap, and she would go, here he, here he. Yeah, okay. On this date, December 3, 2002, it is hereby declared, now I would make her, What is this we're here? I would make her greet her. I would have her stand in front of the gate, the entrance to Boobville, much like a ex-heavyweight fighter stands in front of a casino. And just greet the guests. Who's number one?
21:42
Caller
I was wondering if I could ask Dr. Drew a quick question.
21:44
Adam
Answer any questions the guys might have. What makes you the number one Asian big boob queen?
21:49
Drew
What's your other question?
21:50
Caller
Okay, yeah. I was wondering, I've liked this guy for three years, and he used to like me, but now he doesn't like me anymore. I still like him, but I'm not sure how I should go about getting over him.
22:00
Drew
You're fat. I should not. Oh, come on. Getting over him. This may sound cliche, but another guy.
22:08
Adam
Yeah.
22:08
Caller
I tried that though, and the last guy I ended up dating, he kind of ended up using me.
22:13
Drew
Well, I'm suspicious that this guy that you're into for all these years is not so great either.
22:18
Adam
This guy liked you for three years?
22:19
Caller
Pardon?
22:20
Adam
He liked you for three years?
22:22
Drew
No, no, no.
22:22
Caller
I liked him.
22:23
Drew
He would kind of for a while liked her, and she can't get over it.
22:26
Adam
Yeah, but when did he like you?
22:28
Caller
Right at the beginning.
22:30
Drew
When they were fourteen.
22:30
Adam
And he doesn't like you anymore?
22:31
Caller
No, he doesn't.
22:32
Adam
You know, that's such a weird concept that mostly guys have. That, hey, this chick liked me at one point in her life, when she suffered some head trauma, coconut laying on her head.
22:45
Drew
She thought she was married?
22:46
Adam
Yeah, I mean, even as an adult, I cannot really, I haven't fully been able to grasp that this chick used to like me, anyone who used to like me should still like me. I cannot really grasp that fully. I understand it intellectually, I can't feel it. But when I was in high school, forget it.
23:02
Drew
It's like lost potential. That was the potential for the connection and I blame myself for ruining it. So I got to get it back.
23:09
Adam
I could remember being in high school like a senior in high school and thinking about some chick that may have liked me in the seventh grade and still really giving it some thought. Like she should still like me. I just had a conversation with someone about that.
23:25
Drew
I'll explain to you during the break.
23:27
Adam
All right. And as it turns out, it's worse. They like me less.
23:33
Drew
Yeah.
23:33
Adam
It's not even even.
23:34
Drew
It's because you're getting creepy.
23:36
Adam
Yeah. Yeah, that's it. Creepy.
23:39
Drew
But you're coming at it a little bit. You're like, hey, you used to like me, huh?
23:43
Adam
No, no. It's just like I'm a car they sort of thought they liked, but they actually test drove and realized it hurt them.
23:50
Drew
When you're coming back around, you're coming back around as the clingy guy.
23:54
Adam
Thank you.
23:54
Drew
You see? And that's creepy.
23:56
Adam
I'd like to do a whole superhero called the clingy guy, where I just hang on a girl's legs as they drag me down the street crying. And stop crying. Yeah, I said stop crime, Anderson. That's a superhero part. By tripping them. When we come back, we're going to talk to Brandon, who's 17 and gets sexually aroused by cartoon characters. Well, speaking of my superhero idea. And he likes...
24:25
Drew
Popeye.
24:25
Adam
Oh, is that what that says? All right, we'll be back after this.
24:30
Drew
Hello?
24:31
Caller
This is Loveline. Call 1-800-LOVE-191. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.
24:44
Caller
Yep, Loveline.
24:46
Adam
I'm Adam Corolla, and that is Dr. Drew, everyone, in studio with us. Actually, physically in studio for Rare Loveline Appearance. Tonight might be a good night to get some of those medical questions. Again, he does addiction medicine, if I'm not mistaken.
25:02
Drew
This show wraps up by 11?
25:05
Adam
You're cutting out of here at 11. I'm going to go the next hour. I got one more hour.
25:09
Drew
It's a two-hour show?
25:10
Adam
Two hours.
25:10
Drew
You do two hours every night on this show?
25:12
Adam
Well, five nights a week.
25:13
Drew
Oh, my God.
25:15
Adam
Yeah. You know, it's funny. We're really seriously three-quarters of the guests who come on this show, especially the ones who aren't real familiar with this show. They go, first off, they assume the show is on the night they're on.
25:27
Drew
Right, period.
25:27
Adam
That's how your brain works. They come on Sunday night, they come on Wednesday night. Whatever night they're on is whatever night the show is on. And then we explain to them that it's on five nights a week, which is usually okay with them at the beginning of the show. But by the time we get to the end of the show, after like 150th rape and incest call, they're like, you seriously do this five nights a week? Like, yeah, they're like.
25:51
Drew
That is how the 1120 break starts every night. Yeah. People taking their headphones off, went, you guys do this every night.
25:59
Adam
It's not so much, it's not really a compliment. It's like, how high do you have to be to do this? And we thought you had talent before.
26:10
Caller
Yeah.
26:11
Adam
17, what's up? Not much. Oh, you get sexually attracted or aroused by cartoons?
26:16
Caller
Yes.
26:17
Adam
Yeah. She-Ra, Lord of the Jungle, was that my favorite? Yeah. Yeah, that's hot. But you like Popeye?
26:24
Drew
The size of an elephant. Sailor Moon.
26:27
Adam
You like Popeye?
26:28
No, Sailor Moon turns me on.
26:30
Drew
Sailor Moon, oh.
26:31
Yeah.
26:31
Adam
What's Sailor Moon?
26:32
Drew
Sailor Moon is sort of one of these Japanese films with the big eyes and sort of, you know.
26:37
Adam
Is it on the Cartoon Network or something?
26:39
Drew
Yeah, it's one of the places it's on.
26:41
Adam
I can't handle that Japanese animation. It's too weird for me. All those huge eyes and herky-jerky movements. Huge eyes and mouths the size of like a sea urchin. Yeah, penny-sized mouths and huge eyes. Is that what they think of us over here? All skinny, skinny as hell and weird movement and I don't understand any of that. If the sound was down though, I think I could squeeze one off. I don't know. Yeah, all right, Brandon. Are you high all the time? No. Are you high now? No. You do smoke weed, though, don't you? Yeah.
27:16
Drew
Oh, come on, man.
27:17
Adam
Well, look at it. Do you pleasure yourself to cartoons? Yeah. All right. Well, that's a time and money saver. You should thank your lucky stars. All right. You're fine, buddy.
27:28
Drew
Except for the pod part.
27:29
Adam
Yeah. Easy with the weed.
27:31
Drew
All right.
27:32
Adam
Listen, you know your stone when you're jacking off to cartoons. All right. Oh, man.
27:38
Drew
Oh, boy, Brandon.
27:39
Adam
Brandon, listen, I know it's kind of funny now. You're being baked all the time, but later on in life, it's not going to be that funny.
27:45
Drew
There is ample evidence that when you start this around 15, which I'm certain you did, you actually lose part of the right frontal lobe of your brain. It actually shrinks down as good evidence for that. And that's the part of the brain you use to negotiate adolescents in development.
28:00
Adam
Well, listen, I mean, I don't know about brain shrinkage. I just know you smoke weed all the time. It makes you an idiot, especially when you're young.
28:09
Drew
Especially when you're young.
28:12
Adam
Anastasia?
28:13
Yeah.
28:13
Adam
We got a bunch of weird Disney names tonight.
28:16
No.
28:16
Adam
Well, you're 15. What's up?
28:19
Caller
Like, the other day, I was, like, I do videos, right? I'm under the age, too. What? I do videos.
28:25
Adam
What do you mean you do them?
28:27
Caller
Yeah, I'm in them.
28:28
Adam
You're in them.
28:29
Caller
Yeah.
28:30
Adam
For what? For no videos?
28:31
Caller
Yeah.
28:32
Adam
Really? At 15?
28:34
Caller
Yeah.
28:35
Drew
Oh, boy.
28:36
Adam
Fantastic.
28:37
Drew
No, no, no.
28:37
Adam
Well, she's mapped out a career. And...
28:41
Drew
Wow.
28:42
Adam
How's that work? You got fake ID?
28:45
Caller
Hmm, kind of, yeah. Is that another people that work there?
28:48
Adam
What do you mean kind of, yeah?
28:50
Caller
Well, they made me one.
28:52
Adam
So, you have a fake... You have a fake ID?
28:55
Caller
Yeah.
28:55
Adam
Okay. Kind of, yeah, to me means, like, I got a fake ID, but it only says I'm 16. Okay, so you have a fake ID.
29:03
Caller
Yeah. And what happened was that...
29:05
Adam
Wait a minute. How long have you been doing these porno movies?
29:07
Caller
Just for, like, a couple of months. About eight months.
29:09
Drew
How did you get into this?
29:11
Caller
What do you mean how?
29:12
Caller
Oh, boy.
29:14
Caller
You know, like, details or...
29:16
Adam
How do you describe how?
29:18
Caller
I don't know.
29:19
Adam
You could use words like mode, but then that'll get confusing.
29:23
Drew
How? Let me give it a...
29:24
Adam
What brought you... Okay, Drew's gonna look up how. What brought you into this life?
29:33
Caller
I thought it was interesting.
29:35
Adam
You thought it was interesting?
29:36
Caller
Yeah.
29:37
Adam
You always want to work with penis?
29:39
Caller
I like older guys.
29:40
Adam
You like older guys?
29:41
Caller
Yeah.
29:41
Drew
Were you raped when you were a little kid by an older guy?
29:43
Caller
Oh, no. Nope.
29:45
Adam
Nope? Where's your dad?
29:46
Caller
He's around.
29:47
Adam
Around where?
29:48
Caller
Downstairs.
29:49
Adam
I see. What do your parents think you're doing?
29:52
Caller
I have no idea.
29:54
Drew
Well, akin to. In what manner or way?
29:57
Caller
My granddad's or something.
29:59
Adam
Drew just looked up how.
30:00
Caller
Yeah.
30:00
Adam
All right. So your parents don't know you're doing this.
30:04
Caller
No.
30:04
Adam
Are you in high school?
30:05
Caller
Yeah.
30:06
Adam
And are you in the 10th grade?
30:08
Caller
Yeah. I'm in the CUC though.
30:10
Drew
What's that mean?
30:10
Adam
California correctional something?
30:13
Caller
No, because what happened was I was locked up and I got out and they sent me to a CUC.
30:18
Adam
All right. What's the CUC?
30:20
Caller
Like a continuation.
30:21
Adam
Oh, right.
30:22
Caller
Yeah.
30:23
Adam
Yeah. One of those. It's not really schools, more of a holding pen for stoners.
30:27
Caller
Yeah.
30:28
Adam
Yeah. My sister went to one of those. It's a petting zoo for stoners. We used to go there and pet the stoners. Hey, hey, don't feed them. Don't feed them. No, no, no, no. One of them died eating a Funion last year. Let's keep that away from them. Hot bitch. They get, they get slopped at noon.
30:43
Caller
Oh my God.
30:44
Adam
Yeah, it was great. It was called Amelia Earhart. It was right on the corner of North Hollywood High.
30:48
Caller
She must be very proud.
30:49
Adam
And it was great. It was one of these great schools. It's like, it's a great approach to education, which is these are kids that can't handle structure. So we'll create a school with no structure, which is you call your teacher by your first name, you can smoke during class, and you come and go as you please. So how do you think that works? Like if you got a kid who can't handle structure, you put him in the Marine Corps. You ram structure up his ass. You don't back way off and see what he does. It's like you got a kid who doesn't like to work, likes to smoke weed, let's get him some snacks, give him the remote control and leave him on the sofa. Eventually he'll get with it. Now he'll get fat and watch more TV.
31:26
Drew
That's like sacrificing them. Really, they're going to sacrifice these kids.
31:30
Adam
No one ever shows up to those schools. So what do you do? You go to school for a half hour Monday, Wednesday and Friday?
31:36
Caller
At three hours.
31:37
Adam
Three hours?
31:38
Caller
Yeah.
31:38
Adam
Right, what, five days a week?
31:40
Caller
Yeah.
31:41
Adam
And what do you do? What do you call your teachers? First name or last name?
31:45
Caller
Last name.
31:46
Adam
And...
31:46
Drew
Things have changed now. They're coming back into reality, by the way.
31:50
Adam
Yeah, you go from what time to what time?
31:53
Caller
From eight to 12.
31:55
Adam
Isn't that four hours?
31:56
Caller
Yeah, but we have breaks and everything in between.
31:59
Adam
I see. And then after that, you get your work permits, you can make porn movies?
32:04
Caller
Pretty much. It's really done like off the books.
32:08
Adam
You get paid cash?
32:09
Caller
Yeah.
32:10
Adam
How much do you get paid?
32:11
Caller
A lot.
32:12
Adam
Okay, hold on. I need my pen. I got to write that down. I've always been curious exactly how much underage girl gets in porn. As it turns out, it's a lot.
32:20
Caller
About 800 or 900 each video.
32:23
Adam
Each scene or each video?
32:24
Caller
Each video.
32:25
Adam
I see. And where do you make these? What city? Where?
32:29
Caller
In Hollywood.
32:30
Adam
All right. And how many have you made?
32:32
Caller
About seven.
32:34
Adam
About seven?
32:35
Caller
Yeah.
32:36
Adam
And are you calling because you'd like to stop?
32:39
Caller
No, I'm calling because what happened was that we were making a video and what happened was that one of the ants had walked in.
32:46
Drew
One of the ants?
32:46
Caller
Yeah, because I guess it was like we were going to the house.
32:49
Adam
During a picnic scene?
32:50
Drew
One of the males, one of the boys' ants?
32:53
Caller
Yeah, we were at the house though and I guess his ant was supposed to come by and visit but she said it was like she was from out of state and it was supposed to be a couple of days later when she came early I guess.
33:03
Drew
Welcome home.
33:05
Caller
Yeah, he gets the doors unlocked, he walked in, we're like damn. He? Yeah.
33:10
Adam
He ant? Ant he?
33:13
Caller
What?
33:14
Adam
The male ant?
33:15
Caller
Yeah.
33:16
Adam
Followed by Geraldine, the uncle? Hold on a second.
33:22
Drew
Yeah, this is a neuropsychiatric, you know what I'm saying? Yeah.
33:26
Adam
No.
33:27
Drew
Yeah.
33:27
Adam
I think this is super, super stupid.
33:29
Drew
That's what I mean, like some fetal alcohol syndrome or something.
33:32
Adam
Really? I don't know. We've had dumber people call this show at 15.
33:38
Drew
Yeah, but that's like, things aren't connecting right. I mean, the wiring's off.
33:43
Adam
Well, yeah, but we have a lot of people that just talk about people as if you know them.
33:48
Drew
Yeah, but that's just that grandiosity. This is really like concepts like aunt don't connect.
33:53
Adam
All right. Anastasia?
33:55
Caller
Yeah.
33:55
Adam
You understand that predominantly, not in all cases, but aunt is more of a female role?
34:01
Caller
Yeah.
34:01
Adam
Right, that'd be like a female who came in, right?
34:04
Caller
Yeah, it was.
34:05
Adam
Okay, so she came in?
34:08
Caller
Yeah. Okay.
34:09
Adam
All right. We thought you said he for a second.
34:12
Caller
Oh, no.
34:12
Adam
No, she did.
34:13
Caller
Yeah.
34:14
Adam
And she was coming in from out of town?
34:16
Caller
Yeah.
34:16
Adam
And she saw the whole production?
34:19
Caller
She saw pretty much of it.
34:20
Adam
And what were you doing at the time?
34:23
Caller
I'm getting laid.
34:24
Adam
I see. You're having sex.
34:25
Caller
Yeah.
34:26
Adam
And so she saw this and what did she do?
34:29
Caller
She was freaked out.
34:31
Drew
Can't blame her.
34:33
Adam
And did she call the cops or is she threatening to do something?
34:35
Caller
She's seeing the lawyer right now, this and that, and this and that.
34:38
Drew
Good.
34:39
Caller
And the thing is that...
34:40
Adam
But wait a minute. Is this her house?
34:43
Caller
No.
34:43
Adam
She came in from out of town?
34:45
Caller
Yeah.
34:45
Drew
Yeah, but she's going to get the guys that were doing this to her.
34:47
Caller
Yeah.
34:48
Adam
How did she know you were underage?
34:50
Caller
Because I don't know. I guess like... I don't really know that.
34:53
Adam
Wait a minute. Hold on. Hold on. This isn't your aunt. This is the guy who owns the house's aunt. Oh, yeah. How did she know you were underage?
35:01
Caller
I don't know. I guess I looked younger or something, but I'm not sure. And so what happens is that she's saying that she's going to see a lawyer, this and that, and this and that.
35:08
Adam
About you?
35:09
Caller
Yeah, and about the guys, because statutory rape or something like that. And so I'm just like, what's going to happen?
35:17
Drew
First of all, where's your mom?
35:20
Caller
In her room.
35:22
Adam
What room?
35:24
Caller
Her room.
35:24
Adam
In your house?
35:25
Caller
Her room. In my house, yeah.
35:26
Drew
Did your mom or dad drink or do drugs?
35:28
Caller
No.
35:29
Adam
Really?
35:29
Drew
Was there anything, do you have any medical problems?
35:32
Caller
No.
35:33
Drew
You weren't, mom didn't drink when she was pregnant with you or anything like that?
35:36
Caller
No, no.
35:39
Adam
She didn't fall off a trapeze when she was eight months pregnant or something like that?
35:43
Drew
You have no head injury history?
35:45
Adam
No. Really?
35:47
Drew
And you've been in a psychiatric hospital before?
35:49
Caller
No way.
35:50
Adam
No way?
35:51
Caller
No.
35:51
Adam
And what's your dad do for a living?
35:54
Caller
He works at a designing company.
35:57
Adam
He works at a designing company?
35:58
Caller
Yeah.
35:59
Adam
What does he design?
36:00
Caller
He just like does, like, I guess, store, like, you know, clothing.
36:04
Adam
I see.
36:05
Caller
Yeah.
36:06
Drew
OK.
36:08
Adam
I see.
36:08
Drew
Don't try.
36:09
Adam
OK. And he doesn't drink, he never beat you. No, you were never raped. No, you're never molested. No, you don't have any older brothers or stepbrothers or uncles that felt you up when you were five. No, nothing like that ever happened. When did you lose your virginity?
36:26
Caller
When I was 13.
36:27
Adam
How old was the guy?
36:28
Drew
Nineteen.
36:29
Caller
When? When I lost my virginity?
36:31
Drew
Yes.
36:32
Caller
Yeah.
36:32
Adam
Remember the guy who was attached to the penis that was in you when you were 13?
36:36
Drew
He was 19, the usual.
36:37
Adam
Dr. Drew said 19. He's got that ramp figured out. We're trying to figure out why you're so screwed up.
36:44
Caller
I don't know.
36:45
Adam
You don't know? Just that way? Just lucky?
36:46
Caller
Yeah, I guess so.
36:47
Adam
All right. So can you stop doing these porno movies?
36:51
Caller
Yeah.
36:52
Adam
Why don't you stop that before you build up too big a library? You know, my hope and dream for my daughter is that she does less than 20 porn movies by the time she graduates high school. The problem is, you're doing 8 in your freshman and sophomore year already puts you above that 20 mark. You understand?
37:09
Caller
Yeah.
37:09
Adam
If you were to keep going, you'd be up around 32.
37:12
Caller
Yeah.
37:12
Adam
So why don't you stop that? I know you must not feel too good about that, do you?
37:17
Caller
Not really. It's just the money that comes in.
37:19
Adam
Do people in high school know this? Does anyone at your school know?
37:24
Caller
Like, two of my closest friends. That's about it.
37:27
Adam
None of the guys have seen the movies?
37:29
Caller
No.
37:30
Adam
You ever see the movies somewhere?
37:31
Caller
No, not yet. They haven't told me nothing.
37:34
Adam
Okay. All right. This is illegal. I don't know what our obligation is. I don't know what we can do about it. We can ask you to stop and tell you that it's very important that you stop.
37:45
Drew
And that you, I know you are sort of aversive. You don't want to get any help with the way you're behaving, but you really need to. You're on a course that is going to lead to a dramatic shortening of literally your life expectancy, your ability to get pregnant in the future, your ability to be effective as a parent, your ability to hold a job.
38:04
Adam
We're not being able to get pregnant in the future. You're counting that as a con.
38:08
Drew
Good for us, but for her it's a con. And you really need to think about your life and get help with looking at why these behaviors are becoming so out of control.
38:18
Adam
Anastasia, listen to me, sweet pea. I am. You know I'm a genius. I've been around. I've been around. I've been around the world. I've been from North Hollywood to Van Nuys to Arcadia and back. I've seen it all, sister. And I can tell you, you're heading for trouble. I swear to Christ you are. Don't get pregnant. Stop doing these movies. Settle down. Don't do any drugs. Find Jesus Christ. Learn something and go off to college and have a good life. You can. Okay?
38:49
Caller
All right.
38:49
Adam
All right. Take care of yourself.
38:51
Caller
All right. Thank you.
38:51
Caller
All right.
38:53
Adam
Did I tell her to go to college?
38:55
Drew
You told her to find Jesus Christ.
38:56
Adam
Find Jesus Christ and go to hairdressing school. I'm going to refine that a little.
39:00
Drew
Go to junior college.
39:01
Adam
No, no, no.
39:02
Drew
It's Anastasia.
39:05
Adam
No.
39:05
Drew
Even for Anastasia?
39:07
Adam
No.
39:08
Caller
No.
39:08
Adam
This is somebody who thinks an aunt is a male and an aunt is a male.
39:15
Caller
Oh, my testicles got ants on it.
39:17
Adam
All right. We're going to take ourselves a little break. When we come back, we'll speak to Matthew as Penis Is Bent. That's more like it after this.
39:24
Caller
Hello. This is your radio. Love Line will be right back.
39:30
Adam
Hey, yeah. Love Line. What band is this? Oh, Blink 182? Yeah. Good guys.
39:39
Drew
We haven't seen them in a while.
39:42
Adam
Blink 182 has not been on the show in a little while. I run into those guys all over the place. Well, that's recent for me, though. Matthew?
39:53
Yeah?
39:54
Adam
You're 14.
39:55
Caller
Yeah.
39:55
Adam
What's up?
39:56
Caller
My penis is like crooked.
40:01
Drew
Yeah. If it were, you wouldn't be laughing about it.
40:03
Adam
I believe it.
40:04
Caller
No, no.
40:04
Caller
I'm serious. I don't know if it's been like that for like my whole life because I've like not had erections for my whole life.
40:15
Caller
And I was like wondering if I could straighten it out.
40:19
Adam
What do you mean you didn't have erections your whole life?
40:21
Caller
You know, like when you're little, you don't like get an erection.
40:24
Drew
You don't notice them anyway.
40:25
Adam
You get them. They just don't stick out far enough for you to see.
40:29
Caller
It's only crooked when I have an erection.
40:31
Adam
I see. And which way is it, Ben?
40:34
Caller
Left.
40:34
Adam
Left. All right. And does it, Ben, like does it banana to the left or does it sort of dog leg to the left? Does it have a...
40:43
Drew
Hockey stick.
40:43
Adam
Does it have a knuckle in it?
40:45
Caller
No. It's like banana.
40:48
Drew
All right.
40:48
Adam
That's gradual.
40:49
Drew
A certain amount of that is normal. And unless it affects function, unless you can't get an erection or have painful erections, it's not something someone would typically correct. In order to correct it, they have to cut out a piece on the opposite side of the curve of the band.
41:03
Caller
Yeah, they don't do that.
41:05
Drew
To bring it up straight and upright. But that, of course, shortens it. You don't want to do that. About 800 units of vitamin E a day will help it. So do that.
41:12
Adam
Really? Does it really?
41:14
Caller
Yeah.
41:14
Adam
Does it really?
41:15
Caller
Yeah.
41:16
Adam
No.
41:16
Caller
Yeah.
41:17
Adam
Yeah. Okay. You did that study. That doesn't work. What did they put some? Hold on a second. What did they do? Use some sort of compass or some... And figure out the band of a guy's penis and then put them on vitamin E and figure out that it's straightened out over a six month period?
41:32
Drew
It's actually... I'm looking at the plaques that constrict it down to one side and the resolution of those plaques.
41:40
Adam
But not as it pertains to the penis?
41:42
Drew
Penis.
41:42
Adam
Really? Vitamin E?
41:44
Drew
Vitamin E.
41:44
Adam
All right. Yeah. You'll see no discernible difference. I can almost guarantee that. Almost. But if you take the vitamin... It won't get worse. You rub a little on the dork though, right?
41:57
Drew
No. You just eat it. 800 units.
41:59
Adam
Okay. How many units is a regular vitamin E capsule?
42:03
Drew
400.
42:04
Adam
So like two of those a day. All right. Let's talk to... Are we done with him?
42:08
Drew
Yeah.
42:08
Adam
Kristen.
42:09
Caller
Uh-huh.
42:10
Adam
You're 13. What's up?
42:12
Caller
Yeah.
42:13
Caller
I have some problems at home with my mom.
42:17
Drew
With your mom?
42:18
Caller
Yeah.
42:18
Drew
Okay.
42:18
Caller
Well, it's like my whole life has been messed up ever since I was little.
42:23
Drew
How come?
42:24
Caller
Well, just problems with my family. My dad was always away working and every time my brother would come visit me, he would always try to like rake me and stuff.
42:32
Drew
What do you mean visit you?
42:34
Caller
Like every couple of months.
42:36
Drew
Where was he the rest of the time?
42:38
Caller
With his mom.
42:39
Drew
His mom?
42:40
Caller
Yeah. Well, my dad had been married like twice before that. We had three other kids. I have two brothers and one sister.
42:49
Adam
Yeah. I'd like to put a bullet in his nuts. Idiot. Where is he now?
42:55
Caller
With his mom.
42:56
Adam
Where's your dad now?
42:59
Caller
Working in Bastrop.
43:02
Adam
Hold on one second. Let me just say something. Just a quick heads up to all the Loveline callers. When I say something like, where is he or how tall is he or how much does he weigh? He will always refer to the last person we were talking about.
43:17
Drew
Always.
43:18
Adam
So if you're talking about Santa Claus and I say, how long is his beard? Do not answer with who.
43:25
Drew
Or say, you know, my dad's beard is four inches long.
43:30
Adam
What are you saying?
43:30
Drew
That they'll throw back to some other idea five minutes ago.
43:34
Adam
When I use the word he, it will always be the person we talked about most recently.
43:40
Drew
My, still my favorite concrete thinking response we got was the woman we asked why was, it's just like a 16 year old, why is your boyfriend in jail? Well, he was with a group of guys. They had a gun. They pointed at someone and asked for stuff.
43:54
Adam
They wanted stuff.
43:55
Drew
I wanted stuff.
43:56
Adam
Yeah, you know, you mean armed robbery? Well, you know, let's not label it. Kristen? All right, so your brother is with his mom, who is your mom too?
44:07
Caller
No.
44:08
Adam
No, so he's your half brother?
44:10
Caller
Yeah.
44:10
Adam
And he's how old?
44:12
Caller
19.
44:13
Adam
And whenever he comes to stay with you, he wants to rape you?
44:17
Caller
Well, it stopped because I got to the point where I wouldn't allow it anymore.
44:22
Drew
Oh, so we actually did have sex with you?
44:25
Adam
Yes. And this is how long ago?
44:28
Caller
It stopped like two years ago.
44:30
Adam
So it started when you were how, when did it start?
44:33
Caller
About four or five.
44:35
Adam
So you were...
44:35
Drew
Age four or five. Wow.
44:37
Adam
Age four or five?
44:38
Caller
Yeah.
44:39
Adam
So, and this was continuing when he was, you know, 16 and you were 10? Yeah.
44:45
Drew
How awful. I wonder if the fact that she put an end to it alters the victim sort of role. You know what I'm saying?
44:52
Adam
Well, it couldn't hurt.
44:53
Drew
Yeah.
44:54
Adam
Hey, Kristen, does your mom or your dad know about this?
44:58
Caller
No, I never told anybody.
44:59
Drew
Why don't you?
45:01
Caller
Because I just didn't feel like they should know, you know.
45:03
Drew
Well, they need to know so they can help you. You need to get help dealing with this.
45:07
Caller
Well, I mean, I don't have a problem with it.
45:09
Drew
You do. You may not believe you do, but you do.
45:11
Adam
Listen, you were five and this guy was 10 or something.
45:17
Drew
It affects your brain development. Yeah, it changes your whole system.
45:21
Adam
How are you doing in school?
45:22
Caller
Fine.
45:23
Adam
Huh?
45:24
Caller
Great. You know, I get good grades.
45:26
Adam
You do?
45:27
Caller
Yeah, I don't have problems with anything.
45:29
Adam
Now, what's your living situation now?
45:31
Caller
Well, right now, I'm living with my mom.
45:36
Adam
And her 14 kids from a previous relationship?
45:39
Caller
No, I'm her only child.
45:41
Adam
I see, good. All right, so stay with your mom. I don't understand why this guy still comes to stay with you if you're dead.
45:47
Caller
No, he don't.
45:48
Adam
He don't. All right, listen, you get some therapy. You got to talk to someone about this. Tell your mom about this. And stay in school and go far away to college. And I hope your dad gets an attack by wildebeest and eaten alive. I realize because he's a world class jackass. No, he's not. He's spreading his goddamn seed all over the valley like Johnny Rotten seed. He's got a whole. What's he got? Five eight kids for doesn't take care of any of them. And he's got their rapist for son.
46:17
Caller
Well, that's not the only problem I have is my brother. I have I have a little problem with my dad and I have a problem with my mom and my sister. She's a total weirdo.
46:28
Adam
Or besides your dad, mom, brother and sister, your family's good.
46:34
Caller
No, I see a real problem.
46:35
Adam
There's no problem.
46:36
Caller
I don't have any grandparents.
46:37
Adam
All right. They they someone killed them in a will to be gambling argument at some point. Kristen, listen, listen, don't get pregnant. Keep your legs closed. Study and go far away to college. That's your job.
46:50
Drew
Every night.
46:51
Caller
That's your mission.
46:52
Drew
Every call. That's our answer.
46:53
Adam
You understand, Kristen?
46:54
Caller
Yeah, but what we can do about my dad because every girlfriend that he has, they're all strippers and they all have to pay.
47:03
Adam
He's a wonderful, wonderful role model. He's a wonderful husband and a wonderful father.
47:07
Drew
He's just a dad.
47:08
Adam
Listen, hopefully he dies.
47:11
Caller
No, that's not something that I want. I love my dad very much.
47:14
Adam
I know. He's a dynamite individual. I'd love to really sit down and talk to him so I could take a wrench to his head. Idiot. The saddest part is their daughters love them.
47:25
Caller
All right.
47:25
Adam
Listen, I'm going to go find it.
47:26
Caller
We'll be back.
47:30
Caller
Loveline will be right back. So get your problems ready. Ready.
47:51
Caller
Loveline.
47:52
Adam
I'm Adam Corolla. This is Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew, I spoke to his publicist during the commercial. Is he going to stay on until the next break? Yeah.
48:01
Drew
Oh yeah, yeah, mm-hmm.
48:02
Adam
Yeah, I know you got to do the KTLA morning show tomorrow. You got to get pretty early. What time's the car picking you up?
48:08
Drew
4.30.
48:08
Adam
4.30 tomorrow morning. I see. You got to be in makeup by five?
48:13
Drew
I got up 6.30 this morning.
48:15
Adam
I see. And I know you're on a whirlwind tour, and the schedule's tight, and all that kind of stuff. We really appreciate you hanging out.
48:21
Drew
Thanks. Well, I'm having a good time.
48:25
Adam
Okay, but we do break at 11.20. This is 20 minutes.
48:29
Drew
I thought these were, like, 14 minutes.
48:31
Adam
This one goes to 20. Is it all right? Can you hang out? The publicist says you can hang.
48:34
Drew
Okay.
48:35
Adam
All right. Let's just keep going. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Speak to Bridget, who's 17. Bridget?
48:42
Caller
Hi.
48:43
Adam
Hi.
48:43
Caller
Hey, how are your kids, Drew?
48:45
Drew
They're great. They went skiing and they ski like maniacs. They're doing NASTAR races.
48:51
Adam
What races?
48:52
Drew
The slalom. I mean, and of course, nuts.
48:57
Caller
Yeah. Well, okay. I'm 17. And so for the past week, I've had some pretty regular sex. And then the past couple of days-
49:05
Drew
It's part of being 17, Adam. Sure.
49:07
Caller
Yeah. When I have been urinating, it's been slightly uncomfortable and kind of stings.
49:15
Drew
So you have a urine infection. That's part of being sexually active for a female particularly. And you've got to get that taken care of. It's very easily treated. The problem is that if you don't treat it, that can ascend up into your kidneys and be very serious.
49:29
Caller
Yeah, I've heard that. So do I have to see a doctor? Can I like take some supplements?
49:34
Drew
No. You need an antibiotic. You have to see a doctor.
49:37
Adam
Really? What about the old cranberry juice and all that? No. Why not?
49:42
Drew
That helps prevent these.
49:43
Adam
It prevents them.
49:45
Drew
But it will not. Once the bacteria are growing, they must be treated with antibiotics.
49:49
Caller
So does the blood come along with that too?
49:51
Drew
That's the degree of inflammation and infection that's going on. You might even consider going to the emergency room tonight.
49:59
Adam
Really?
50:00
Drew
You can become septic and die within a few hours if it really gets into the kidneys.
50:03
Adam
Well, there's only 50-50 chance of that. Why don't you go tomorrow morning, Bridget?
50:08
Caller
Okay.
50:09
Drew
If you get a fever, chills or vomit tonight, you go immediately, okay?
50:12
Caller
All right.
50:12
Drew
All right.
50:13
Adam
All right, baby.
50:14
Caller
Bye-bye.
50:14
Adam
Good hump. You see how God pays you back?
50:16
Caller
Yeah.
50:20
Drew
Where's she going to finish school?
50:21
Adam
She said, F God. Wow. Hold on. Bridget, pod her up. Is she still there? Come on, Anderson. What's up there, buddy? Is she there, Bridget? No, she hung up. All right. Well, I'll see you in hell, baby. Jesus Christ. F God. I said, you see how God pays you back? She goes, yeah, F him.
50:42
Caller
Is he your disciples, Adam?
50:46
Adam
No kidding. Jesus Christ. I'm thinking of getting out of this whole atheist thing. I don't like the crowd. They scare me, these real atheists. Well, the funny thing is she's probably Mormon or born again. Dennis?
51:00
Caller
Yes.
51:01
Adam
You're 22.
51:02
Caller
First, I want to say, Adam, I think you're a genius. And Dr. Drew, I really respect you for your medical knowledge.
51:09
Drew
Thanks. What's up, Dennis?
51:11
Caller
Okay. My question is, back in November of 99, I was involved in a major car accident. A drunk driver hit me at 90 miles an hour and basically ejected me from my car.
51:22
Caller
Wow.
51:23
Caller
Yeah.
51:24
Adam
What kind of car were you driving?
51:26
Caller
I was driving a 1970 Dodge Afton pickup. He was in one of those old Gio metros.
51:31
Drew
My God, going 90?
51:33
Caller
Yeah.
51:34
Drew
Did he survive?
51:35
Caller
Yeah. Actually, he ran away from the scene and was apprehended shortly thereafter.
51:40
Drew
90 miles an hour? There's that deceleration injury we usually transexoriorita.
51:44
Adam
Breaks your heart valve off.
51:46
Caller
He got really lucky. I don't know what else to say about it.
51:50
Adam
Well, what were you doing in your, were you parked?
51:53
Caller
No, I was driving. I was driving down the road and he ran a red light and hit me right in the passenger side.
51:59
Adam
He broadsided you?
52:01
Caller
Yeah.
52:01
Drew
Wow.
52:01
Adam
All right. Hold on. Let me talk to Drew. No way was he going 90.
52:05
Drew
Both cars would have disintegrated.
52:07
Adam
You drive a three-cylinder, a three-cylinder Gio Metro at 90 miles an hour into an intersection and hit a half-ton 70 Dodge pickup broadside. You're vaporized.
52:21
Drew
Vaporized. Yeah. That's what I would think.
52:23
Adam
They need the jaws of life to get your retainer out of your ass. Oh, yes. They've used it for that before. Now, listen. I'm sure this was a bad accident. And I'm sure the guy was doing 50.
52:36
Drew
Yeah.
52:38
Adam
Dennis. No way was he doing 90.
52:42
Caller
I don't have a clue what type of car it was. I assumed it was a GIO or something like that. A smaller type vehicle, smaller than my truck.
52:49
Adam
All right. Well, anyway, you were hitting on the passenger side.
52:52
Caller
Yeah. And I basically was ejected.
52:54
Adam
So you didn't have your seatbelt on?
52:56
Caller
Well, the truck didn't come with seatbelts. My God.
52:59
Adam
Really? 1970?
53:00
Caller
Yeah.
53:01
Adam
Didn't come with seatbelts. Interesting. Trucks don't have to for many years have the same equipment. Adhere to the same codes that cars had. Anyway, so you were ejected. You landed on your head?
53:15
Caller
You know, I don't remember. From the point of getting hit to waking up in the hospital, I don't remember anything.
53:22
Drew
What's the question?
53:24
Caller
Basically, from that point after, I've basically lost all ability to feel anything towards anyone. Basically, I don't really care about anything.
53:34
Drew
Is that you don't care or you can't empathize? They don't exist. You could hurt them and you wouldn't be bothered by that.
53:44
Caller
Well, I'm a very nonviolent person by nature, so I don't think I could hurt them, but I wouldn't care if they were hurt.
53:53
Drew
But you have, again, let me clarify. Is that you can't empathize with them so anything that happens to them doesn't matter or you have no feelings about them?
54:02
Caller
I can't empathize and I have no feelings about them. Like my family, I really, you know, I've lost contact with my family. I really don't talk to anyone in my family anymore.
54:12
Adam
I'm the same way. I was even in an accident.
54:15
Drew
Did you mistreat them?
54:16
Caller
No.
54:17
Drew
You just don't care?
54:19
Caller
Yeah, I just don't care.
54:20
Drew
Are you on medication?
54:21
Caller
No. Shortly thereafter, I lost my job, so I basically couldn't see a doctor or anything like that. I lost my job because of the accident. I wasn't able to perform my work.
54:33
Drew
You must have seen a lot of doctors around the time of the accident.
54:36
Caller
Yeah.
54:37
Drew
And they didn't put you on medication?
54:39
Caller
No. Just basically, they put me on muscle relaxers and effects, which they said because it was for the depression that would set in.
54:51
Adam
Do you have a girlfriend or anything like that?
54:54
Caller
I did, but we were going to get married two weeks after the accident happened, and she basically went back to her boyfriend that's just getting out of prison.
55:03
Drew
How long ago did this happen?
55:06
Caller
It happened November of 1999.
55:11
Adam
And what about your family? Do they contact you?
55:13
Caller
Yeah. They called me. I was like, yeah, I'm doing okay. Whatever.
55:17
Adam
They call you now?
55:19
Caller
Once in a great while, like on my birthday or Christmas or whatever.
55:23
Adam
Well, they're not that into it either.
55:25
Caller
No, not really.
55:27
Adam
Well, maybe just coming from that kind of families made you the kind of person you are. Let me talk to Drew for a second. This guy blames everything on this accident. Everything. But you know what?
55:36
Drew
It's a little suspicious.
55:37
Adam
I don't think it's all the accident. His girlfriend dumped him and went back with the ex who was coming out of prison two weeks later. Obviously she was dicey. That was a shaky relationship. He lost his job because he got in a horrible accident. I don't know what kind of job that was and it obviously couldn't have been much of a career and shouldn't work that way. He has doctors who saw him all through the accident but didn't see him anymore.
56:04
Drew
Then family that doesn't give a damn.
56:05
Adam
Family that he doesn't have any connection with but they stopped calling, don't seem that interested in him either. It didn't sound like much of a life before the accident and I know everything's getting funneled into the accident but these problems seemed like they were there. Seemed like there was some depression and there was some history of less than ideal family. Dennis, am I right about this?
56:30
Caller
Some of it. I was adopted when I was nine.
56:35
Adam
That's bad.
56:36
Caller
I was taken away from my mom because she's a severe drug addict.
56:40
Adam
There's the depression baby.
56:42
Caller
She was using us as couriers.
56:44
Drew
Did you have a hit couriers?
56:47
Caller
Yeah. Basically, she'd have us bring the drugs to...
56:50
Drew
Yeah, but where was she putting the drugs?
56:52
Caller
Backpacks, whatever.
56:54
Adam
What? What did you think? In his ass? Oh, Drew, what are you watching?
56:58
Caller
Too many movies.
56:59
Adam
Oh, shut up.
57:00
Drew
Listen, I worked at a county hospital.
57:01
Caller
No, you did not.
57:02
Adam
You never saw any nine-year-old mules that had condoms filled with heroin rammed up their rectums.
57:10
Drew
Well, they'd swallow them sometimes.
57:11
Adam
Oh, okay. Well, that's different.
57:13
Caller
And the thing about the career, you're wrong about that one thing. I had a great career going for me.
57:18
Drew
What was that?
57:20
Caller
It was in the medical field. I was working in the field as a pre-hospital care.
57:25
Adam
Right. But how great a gig was this, that you get in this horrible, horrific accident in the can you?
57:31
Caller
Well, if you can't lift a patient, you can't work.
57:34
Drew
Lifting patients?
57:36
Caller
Yeah. Basically, you have to put them on the stretcher and put them in the back of an ambulance.
57:40
Adam
All right. Listen.
57:40
Caller
You can't do that.
57:41
Adam
You being a human forklift at the morgue is not exactly the fast track in the medical industry. But listen, Dennis, you got problems and I understand that, but I wouldn't focus on this accident at all. That's something horrible that happened to you, but your whole life has been an accident. I mean, your childhood, being taken away from your mother, her drug addiction, the relationships you've gotten into. These are all things that you need to examine.
58:09
Drew
Being able to have feelings and have connection with other people are major issues for you, no doubt. And maybe the trauma of the accident re-triggered some of this, and certainly head injury can affect mood, and certainly can affect personality. Certainly could affect your ability to have feelings and regulate feelings. But God knows the impact of being a mule of some type to ferry drugs for the drug addicted mom, and ultimately being a foster child. I mean, that is profound, profound abuse.
58:37
Adam
All right, so, what's he do?
58:41
Drew
To base on an addict, I could help him if he were else, which he may be. He's going to talk to us about that.
58:47
Adam
Now listen, I don't even know where to begin. I like to shake him like an etch a sketch and just start over. Dennis, can you work now?
58:55
Caller
Yeah, I'm actually working right now.
58:57
Adam
What are you doing?
58:59
Caller
Security.
59:00
Adam
Oh, all right, do you have anyone, you have friends you can turn to?
59:04
Caller
I have a roommate, that's about it.
59:07
Adam
All right, you need to make friends, you need to find a woman, you need to participate in life. I know it sounds trite, but you need to do it. You need to get out. This, forget about the accident. You got to get some therapy. Go to the library and hang out. Take long walks, listen to classical music. Watch a lot of PBS. I don't know what to say. I don't know where to begin.
59:33
Drew
You get recovery programs again. You get a great connection with people like this.
59:37
Adam
Here's what I want to say. We talk to people all the time that have horrific lives and there's one event in their life that they focus on and they channel and they use as an excuse for all the things that have happened in their life. This accident ain't it. If you had a family that loved you, if you had a mom that you weren't taken away from, if you had a great career, I think, you have a great woman, you would have knocked on your ass for a few weeks, a few months and then you would have been back into your life.
1:00:01
Drew
The accident certainly is a symbol for his life though.
1:00:03
Adam
Right. Emily?
1:00:05
Caller
Yeah.
1:00:05
Adam
You're 27.
1:00:06
Caller
Uh-huh. What's up?
1:00:07
Caller
Well, I'm a recovering postitute and a recovering drug addict and I've recently been married and I have three children from a previous relationship which I have not told my husband about.
1:00:19
Drew
Hold on, stop. He doesn't know about your children?
1:00:22
Caller
No.
1:00:23
Drew
So where are they?
1:00:24
Caller
They've been adopted out throughout the family.
1:00:27
Adam
That's good.
1:00:28
Drew
Does he know the other family members?
1:00:30
Caller
Not really, no. We didn't know each other long before we got married.
1:00:33
Drew
Why is that?
1:00:35
Caller
Well, we met through the internet and got married like 72 hours after we met each other.
1:00:39
Adam
Very, very normal, very healthy behavior.
1:00:43
Drew
Let's explore your recovery for a second. What did your sponsor say about this?
1:00:47
Caller
I didn't go through any, like, NA or AA.
1:00:50
Drew
So that's not recovering?
1:00:52
Caller
Well, I'm seeing a private therapist.
1:00:55
Drew
What did your therapist say about this behavior?
1:00:57
Caller
That it's not healthy.
1:00:58
Drew
Yeah, and so you're really not recovering. You're just sort of in limbo. You're sort of between being a prostitute and engaging in other kinds of destructive behaviors.
1:01:09
Caller
But anyway, my question was...
1:01:10
Adam
And what's up with your screwy family?
1:01:13
Caller
Well, they're all screwed up just as bad as I am.
1:01:15
Adam
Yeah, great. They're raising the kids now?
1:01:17
Caller
Yeah, basically.
1:01:18
Adam
There's a plan.
1:01:19
Caller
Well, you know, it was better than them being with me and putting them in situations like this.
1:01:23
Adam
Take the kids to the S factory that churned you out and let them see if they can weave a little of their magic on the kitties.
1:01:30
Caller
My question...
1:01:31
Adam
Genius.
1:01:31
Caller
Okay, my question was, should I tell my husband about the children or should I not?
1:01:36
Drew
How long have you been married?
1:01:37
Caller
Three months.
1:01:38
Adam
Annulment.
1:01:39
Drew
You are as sick as your secrets. Just let that ring in your head.
1:01:43
Caller
It is.
1:01:44
Adam
Listen, can't you get an annulment?
1:01:47
Caller
No.
1:01:48
Adam
What's this guy do for a living?
1:01:49
Caller
He's in the Navy.
1:01:52
Adam
Are you done with your prostitution?
1:01:54
Caller
Absolutely. I have been for seven months now.
1:01:56
Drew
What changed you?
1:01:58
Caller
I didn't want to live that kind of life anymore. I was sick with myself and sick of the behavior.
1:02:02
Drew
And what happened that scared you? Excuse me? Something happened that really scared you?
1:02:06
Caller
Nothing happened that really scared me. It was just the behavior was disgusting. I was sick with myself.
1:02:09
Adam
Well, listen, I never saw, I never knew any prostitutes, but I did see the movie Night Shift. I know it's a fairly lighthearted romp for a career. Is it a good time?
1:02:19
Caller
No, it wasn't.
1:02:20
Adam
Well, I've seen the movie Henry Winkler.
1:02:24
Caller
I remember the movie.
1:02:25
Adam
It's not like that?
1:02:26
Caller
No, it's not like that.
1:02:27
Drew
What was your drug of choice?
1:02:29
Caller
Methamphetamine.
1:02:30
Drew
When was the last time you used it?
1:02:31
Caller
Eight months ago.
1:02:32
Drew
You're still smoking pot?
1:02:33
Caller
No, absolutely not.
1:02:34
Drew
Alcohol?
1:02:34
Adam
Shelley Long.
1:02:36
Caller
I drink occasionally.
1:02:40
Drew
Is there addiction in your family?
1:02:42
Caller
Absolutely.
1:02:43
Caller
My mother's been recovered for about ten years now from crack cocaine, and my father still uses from what I know.
1:02:49
Adam
Great. Doing a wonderful job with the kids, I'm sure?
1:02:52
Caller
My mother is, yeah.
1:02:53
Adam
Where's your dad?
1:02:54
Caller
I have no idea.
1:02:55
Adam
Good. I hope someone puts a bullet in his head.
1:02:57
Caller
So do I.
1:02:58
Adam
Good. Did he, like, who raped you or molested you or whatever?
1:03:01
Caller
No one did, absolutely not.
1:03:03
Adam
Really?
1:03:03
Caller
Yeah.
1:03:04
Drew
Nobody ever touched you or anything or exposed you to?
1:03:06
Caller
It was an abusive household.
1:03:07
Drew
Nobody exposed you to pornography or anything when you were a kid?
1:03:09
Caller
No, it was more abusive emotionally and verbally than physically.
1:03:12
Adam
Look, I look at me not being exposed to pornography as an abusive household.
1:03:17
Drew
You're trying to make up for that.
1:03:18
Adam
I'd expose myself to the bra section of a Sears catalog like an animal. You understand? Like an animal in the jungle. Hey, does your husband know about the prostitution?
1:03:29
Caller
He does, but we don't talk about it.
1:03:31
Adam
Oh, well, I'm sure that'll go away.
1:03:33
Drew
Yeah.
1:03:34
Adam
Okay, listen, you promised me no more kids.
1:03:37
Caller
No, no, I'm on the Depra Povera shot.
1:03:39
Drew
Good.
1:03:40
Adam
Who put you on that?
1:03:41
Caller
I did.
1:03:42
Adam
Good girl.
1:03:42
Drew
By the way, there's a combo shot out there now that has estrogen and progesterone. For those of you that have unpleasant side effects from the progesterone, you know, they get irritable or their libido goes down, that kind of thing, which is kind of common.
1:03:52
Caller
Right.
1:03:53
Drew
Add that estrogen in if you feel like it, if you talk to your doctor about it. But this therapist you're seeing, is he or she familiar with people that are coming out of prostitution and addiction?
1:04:03
Caller
Yeah, he knows everything about it.
1:04:05
Drew
No, no, no, not about your experience with it. Is he an expert in that field?
1:04:09
Caller
I'm not quite sure I've been asked.
1:04:11
Adam
All right, hey, how do you afford the private therapist?
1:04:15
Caller
How do I afford it? Well, my husband makes good money in the Navy.
1:04:18
Adam
He does?
1:04:19
Caller
Yeah.
1:04:20
Adam
What's he do, smuggle booze?
1:04:21
Caller
No, he's a high-ranking officer, actually.
1:04:24
Adam
He is?
1:04:24
Caller
Yeah.
1:04:24
Adam
What's his rank?
1:04:26
Caller
I'd rather not say. In case he's listening this evening.
1:04:29
Adam
All right.
1:04:29
Caller
General?
1:04:31
Adam
No.
1:04:31
Caller
Admiral.
1:04:32
Adam
No.
1:04:33
Caller
We're Admiral.
1:04:34
Adam
All right. That's one of the movies she did before she got into prostitution.
1:04:38
Caller
We're Admiral.
1:04:39
Adam
All right, Emily. Enjoy yourself there, babe.
1:04:41
Caller
Thank you.
1:04:42
Adam
Good luck. Hey, listen, you take care of those kids. Do you hear me?
1:04:46
Caller
Well, I really have no contact with them.
1:04:48
Adam
I know. OK. But you've got the baboons who raised you raising them. That doesn't bother you at all?
1:04:55
Caller
It bothers me extremely, but I don't know what to do about it.
1:04:57
Adam
Are any of them boys?
1:04:59
Caller
Excuse me?
1:04:59
Adam
How many of them are boys?
1:05:00
Caller
One.
1:05:01
Adam
All right. We have to kill the boy, because he's going to be a criminal. He may kill one of my sons. You understand me? I hold you personally responsible for all the crime that's committed by that kid. Now, are they all living with your ex-junkie mom?
1:05:15
Caller
One's with my mother and the other two are with their father.
1:05:18
Adam
Their father?
1:05:20
Caller
Their father, yeah.
1:05:21
Adam
The John who knocked you up?
1:05:23
Caller
No, he wasn't a John. He's recently remarried and has a wonderful wife and a wonderful family.
1:05:30
Adam
Really?
1:05:30
Caller
Absolutely.
1:05:31
Drew
Why aren't all three kids with him?
1:05:32
Caller
Excuse me?
1:05:33
Drew
Why aren't all three kids with him?
1:05:34
Caller
Because all three aren't his.
1:05:37
Adam
Stupid question. All right, what's he do for a living?
1:05:40
Caller
He drives a truck for a local trucking company.
1:05:43
Adam
All right, so he's on the fast track.
1:05:45
Drew
Wonderful.
1:05:46
Adam
All right, all right, it's all relative. Okay, all right, Emily, take care of yourself.
1:05:52
Drew
Good luck.
1:05:52
Adam
Thank you. Lie to your husband.
1:05:54
Drew
Just bring your husband to the therapy session sometime.
1:05:56
Adam
And by the way, you meet some chick over the internet, you get married 72 hours later, this is what you get. On the ride home from the chapel. Oh, by the way, FYI, you knew my hobbies, skiing, equestrian, sailing, and taking long walks on the beach. As it turns out, I was a prostitute and I got three kids.
1:06:16
Caller
Don't!
1:06:17
Drew
And I was trying out on speed for 10 years.
1:06:20
Adam
Dad's crack addict. Fantastic.
1:06:23
Drew
Drive on.
1:06:23
Adam
Anyway, Penny for your thoughts. Let me tell you something weird about we had that call the guy was throwing from the car. It just struck me as strange. I was talking to Gary. Gary's the rain man, the idiot savant carpenter I work with. This guy is in his forties, the nicest guy in the world. He's a good carpenter, a good Finnish carpenter, and we work together all day. That's who I hang out with. We build cabinets and work in my garage. Gary's a very simple man, lives in a trailer.
1:06:54
Drew
I remember you talked to this guy before with his ex-wife.
1:06:57
Adam
With his ex-wife. An 18 foot long by 5 foot wide trailer.
1:07:01
Drew
Takes care of her.
1:07:02
Adam
Takes care of his ex-wife who can't find a new place even though they've been divorced for a year. Has to live in essentially a prison cell on wheels with her.
1:07:11
Drew
She's hell on wheels, right?
1:07:12
Adam
She's a mess and a half and he's the world's nicest guy. So I was talking to Gary yesterday while we were building some cabinets and I like Gary. Our deal is I pay him, he listens to me talk and he agrees. That's our relationship. So I said he was talking about high school sports. I'll tell him one of my football stories. I've told him the same one like 35 times, but he doesn't care. He's on the clock. And he says, yeah, I didn't play football in high school. I wanted to go out for the team, but my dad said football was too dangerous. I said, that's interesting because you told me in another conversation that you always rode motorcycles, that you bought your first one when you were 15, enduro street bike. I mean, a street legal bike, and you went from one enduro motorcycle to the next, and you rode bikes from 15 to 25. He said, yeah. I said, your father, he worried about you playing football, but he didn't worry about you killing yourself on the motorcycle? And he goes, and here's a guy who has no sense of humor, by the way. And he goes, I did kill myself. And I started laughing. I said, hey, good one, Gary. Everybody's thinking, this guy never makes a joke, is he talking about? And he goes, no, I was clinically dead. And I thought, oh, you did kill yourself. And he said, yeah, I was dead. How long? About 20 seconds. I was on the table. So what happened? So I was hurrying home. I was 16. I was riding my Enduro motorcycle. I wasn't wearing a helmet. Car turned left in front of me. Clip man went flying, broke my wrist, cracked a few ribs, punctured a lung, whacked in the head. I was on the...
1:08:45
Drew
This is why he's living with his ex-wife.
1:08:46
Adam
I was on the table. I was thinking to myself, who was explaining a few things. I was on the table and my heart stopped. I was dead. And I thought, well, that's nice. And then I thought, well, you really did illustrate my point, didn't you, Gary? You rarely get that kind of satisfaction, that kind of payday when you're trying to make a point about your dad worrying about you going out for the football team, you're riding a motorcycle. In the 10th grade, you're clinically dead from riding a motorcycle. And I said, yep, that's exactly what I was worried about happening, Gary. See what I mean? I hope you learned your lesson.
1:09:17
Drew
You could have killed yourself and you did.
1:09:19
Adam
You know the beauty of Gary? He was hurrying home because he wanted to ask his dad for a loan to get a bigger bike.
1:09:25
Drew
Oh, seriously?
1:09:26
Adam
Yes, when he got in an accident. And then I said to him, did you ever get the bigger bike? And he said, right out of the hospital. Still had a forearm cast on when I was on that 750 Triumph.
1:09:36
Drew
He's an addict.
1:09:37
Adam
Nope.
1:09:38
Drew
He's an alcoholic.
1:09:40
Adam
He is drunk when I call him at night.
1:09:41
Drew
Yeah, thank you.
1:09:42
Adam
He drinks a few beers at night. He's an alcoholic. Listen, how dare you? How dare you attack my help?
1:09:46
Drew
I'm not telling you. It's just that only alcoholics do that kind of stuff.
1:09:49
Adam
All right. I think you said... No, he didn't say that. No, he didn't do that. We're going to take ourselves a break. When we come back, we'll speak to Bill, his wife, his... his wife has juices when she has an orgasm and it burns his sack. Yikes. After this.
1:10:13
Hello. What is this?
1:10:14
Caller
This is Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191.
1:10:17
Loveline, we'll be right back.
1:10:20
Adam
Hey, Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. He is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Let's see how back on the phone. Bill's wife does the juicing. Bill? Your wife churns out some juice when she orgasms? She does the juicing.
1:10:35
What does she do?
1:10:38
Adam
She does the juicing. When she orgasms?
1:10:41
Yeah, it's basically, you know, to be having sex, and when she has an orgasm, it drips down, lands on my scrotum, and it burns.
1:10:54
Adam
Yeah, it's like that movie Alien.
1:10:56
Yeah, kind of.
1:10:57
Adam
And then it burns, it drops off your nuts, burns a hole through the mattress and the box spring, then the floor, then down into the basement. It keeps going.
1:11:05
Not that bad, but enough where I want to jump up and get a moist towel or something and wipe it off.
1:11:13
Adam
I see.
1:11:14
Drew
Do you have any other testicular features like yeast or fungus or anything, dot jock itch, anything like that?
1:11:22
No.
1:11:23
Adam
Is she of Hispanic descent?
1:11:26
Drew
What the hell are you asking about?
1:11:27
Well, she's a lot of everything.
1:11:30
Adam
I see. Well, those Mexican ladies, the hot tamales.
1:11:33
Drew
I see the capsaicin in their blood.
1:11:35
Adam
It's like pepper spray comes out of them.
1:11:36
Drew
That's nice.
1:11:37
Adam
Yeah. You're blind if you get down there.
1:11:40
Drew
Could be a new self-defense move over here.
1:11:42
Adam
Hey, Bill, does she have to be on top to have the orgasm?
1:11:47
No.
1:11:47
Adam
How about you get on top, give her the orgasm and then it drips on her ass and burns her?
1:11:53
It doesn't seem to bother her.
1:11:56
Drew
That's the point.
1:11:57
When it gets quite moist down there and when it lands on my scrotum sack, I think what he's saying is he's going to get it no matter what, is what he's saying.
1:12:08
Adam
It's going to spray out no matter what?
1:12:10
Yeah. I mean, it doesn't happen all the time, but when it does happen, it is very uncomfortable.
1:12:14
Adam
Yeah.
1:12:15
Drew
Well, there are there-
1:12:16
It ruins the moment.
1:12:17
Drew
Yeah.
1:12:18
Adam
Yeah. We've never heard this question before. The sack is very porous, though. I remember after cleaning something in gasoline, scratching my nuts once and feeling a burning sensation in my brain.
1:12:31
Drew
Your point about her, then?
1:12:33
Adam
My point about her is, why, did I have a point about her? He needs to do, she's a high test, as they say.
1:12:42
Drew
High grade.
1:12:43
Adam
I would take myself a lobster bib, a mini lobster bib, tied around the base of my penis, letting it dangle over my scrotum.
1:12:50
Drew
Does it have to have one of those lobsters on it? The pictures.
1:12:53
Adam
No.
1:12:53
Drew
It could just be any kind of bib, then.
1:12:54
Adam
Well, map of the continental United States.
1:12:57
Drew
Baby bib? Those little terry cloth ones?
1:12:59
Adam
No, I'll tell you what I would use. You see in hockey, hockey goalies use that clear piece that hangs down to protect their neck. Now catchers in baseball have a little attachment.
1:13:11
Drew
It's too big.
1:13:13
Adam
Not for me.
1:13:13
Drew
I know you do.
1:13:14
Caller
I have huge nuts.
1:13:15
Drew
The average testicle is not near the hang.
1:13:18
Adam
How about using a small shoehorn with a pipe cleaner that's twisted around the base of your penis, letting it dangle in front, creating a shield.
1:13:25
Drew
I just think the baby bibs with the little snaps at the top and the three blocks on them, ABC.
1:13:31
Adam
Right, a little powder blue teddy bear. Yeah. How about that?
1:13:36
Drew
Also just keep a wet washcloth at the bedside and just wipe it off quickly.
1:13:40
Adam
Yeah. Hey, Bill? Yeah. Yeah, why don't you get a little bib? I think it comes in Barbie's, you gotta buy like Barbie's Winnebago or something, but there's a bib that comes with that. You can tie that around your base, your penis, you let it hang down. Or, there's actually, I got an idea.
1:13:59
Drew
The grommet could have a flap.
1:14:01
Adam
The mud flap.
1:14:02
Drew
The grommet could have a mud flap.
1:14:03
Adam
Not bad. Not bad. Now think about how that would affect different positions. There's actually a gel, like protectoderm, I did an infomercial for it once, where you rub it on your hands and it stops stuff from sticking. Meaning, you put your hand in motor oil, you rub that on your nuts. You know the stuff I'm talking about, the kind of thing I'm talking about?
1:14:24
Drew
I've heard of that, I don't know what it was made of. And it probably was heavy petroleum based, right?
1:14:28
Adam
Why doesn't he lube up his nuts with some Vaseline or something, just to protect it, clog the pores a little bit?
1:14:34
Drew
I'm using condoms.
1:14:36
Adam
Wesley?
1:14:37
Caller
Yeah.
1:14:37
Adam
Ear 20, what's up?
1:14:38
Caller
Yeah, I was dating this girl and it was actually only on the first date, but she had some heavy problems, really a big codependency, some family problems. She was in a ballet as a kid and so she was bulimic when she was like 14.
1:14:55
Adam
Yeah, it was great stuff.
1:14:56
Drew
This is a lovely listener by Wesley's.
1:14:59
Adam
Good.
1:14:59
Drew
Yeah, that's our usual criteria here.
1:15:01
Caller
Well, I've been listening to the show for like five years, so thank goodness, thanks to the show. I haven't actually had to call until now most because I've educated myself through the show.
1:15:10
Drew
Right, it seems like you chose one carefully based on the kinds of concerns we have.
1:15:15
Caller
Yeah, well, I try to choose carefully, but this one kind of jumped on me and attacked me without mercy.
1:15:22
Adam
Well, what's your question?
1:15:24
Caller
Well, she attaches pretty quickly and she's in pretty deep, and I'm worried that if I cut this off right now quickly, she's going to think it's because...
1:15:35
Adam
Have you had sex with her? No.
1:15:37
Drew
Good.
1:15:37
Adam
You went on one date?
1:15:39
Caller
Yes.
1:15:39
Adam
All right, nip this in the bud.
1:15:41
Drew
Yeah.
1:15:42
Caller
Well, I'm kind of worried because now that she's told me about all of her past stuff...
1:15:46
Drew
Yeah, you have the codependency issues, not her.
1:15:49
Caller
I do.
1:15:50
Adam
Yes. Listen, whatever it is, it's going to be worse down the road. Well, however much discomfort you're feeling now about breaking up with her, it's going to be worse. Whatever it is, it's going to be worse. So do it now.
1:16:04
Caller
Okay. Well, just my problem, my thing is, is that I have a feeling that she's going to think that I'm doing this because of things that happened in her past. I don't want to...
1:16:13
Adam
No, she's 100% right.
1:16:17
Caller
She... well, I mean...
1:16:18
Adam
Isn't that why you're doing it?
1:16:21
Caller
Well, yeah, but I don't want to...
1:16:22
Caller
I mean, I don't want to make more of an issue for her.
1:16:24
Adam
All right, you listen. You tell her you broke up with your ex-girlfriend and now she's going through a bunch and it's just not the right time.
1:16:31
Caller
Oh, okay.
1:16:32
Adam
Listen, would you make up some BS? Just BS, would you?
1:16:37
Drew
The longer you stay with this, the more chaos, the more painful, the more difficulty this can produce.
1:16:43
Adam
Yeah. It's always funny too when guys try to use that kind of chick BS. I just went through a pretty rocky breakup and it was only six months ago and I'm just not ready to date right now. Oh, no, no, no. You're great. You're fantastic. You're sensual. You're beautiful. You're beautiful. Any guy would be blessed to have you. It's just where my head is at right now.
1:17:08
Drew
I'm not open to girls right now.
1:17:10
Adam
I'm just not open to girls right now. I just want some time for me right now to basically sit home in a bully base, my own semen, jacking off to the thought of other chicks I had sex with once. And I just need some time for me. And listen, ladies, if a guy wants to break up with you or is not interested in a second date, he ain't interested in you. Even if he's married, it's you. If a guy ever feeds you that, you know, right now, I'm in sort of a crossroads. I'm going to be going to junior college next semester, works pretty hectic, I'm working long out. Anything, anything. I got some shrapnel in my head from Vietnam. Anything he uses for not going out, forget it. It's all you. He ain't into you, he don't want a second date. I know it sounds painful, God's honest. And I guess women do that too. Although for them, I think it's about 85 percent. For guys, it's 100 percent.
1:18:18
Drew
Well, what else would it, I mean, women actually could have an emotional unavailability. Well, men, it doesn't really matter.
1:18:25
Adam
Right.
1:18:25
Drew
The penis will function.
1:18:26
Adam
Right. Now, as a guy, as a guy, I think as you get, get older, you sort of smell trouble. Maybe you can do that. I've had that situation. Did I tell you that bizarre conversation I had at a party?
1:18:41
Drew
No.
1:18:42
Adam
It was like a year ago.
1:18:44
Drew
Yeah.
1:18:45
Adam
I was single and a very beautiful woman came up to me.
1:18:48
Drew
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1:18:49
Adam
Did I tell you that?
1:18:50
Drew
That roof, that party.
1:18:52
Adam
It was Kathy Griffin's party, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She came up to me and she basically asked me to come over and hang out and have sex. Sometimes she was really hot, but I just didn't want to deal with it. She was going, well, you're a carpenter, right? I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. She goes, well, you could just come over to my house and I got a few problems. I want you to help me fix around the house. I would say, listen, I'll come over to the house next year and we'll be having sex. I didn't want to go there. You said that. Yeah, and she goes, no, no, no. I mean, we could just go out and just be friends. No, no, no. Listen, listen, I know how it works. I became a woman. It was funny. I'm going to go over there. I'm going to be over there to look at your door that's dragging or your threshold that needs to be revised. Next year, you know, I'm going to down a few beers and we're going to be getting it on. It's not going to work. I need space right now. That was the only time I ever meant that. Usually it's 100% BS.
1:19:48
Drew
You had your ovaries removed to that point? Yes.
1:19:52
Adam
I was lactating. All right, we will take ourselves a little break here. When we come back, we'll speak to Michelle. She wants to know if there's a test to see if she's had a miscarriage. I don't know about that, but we'll get the answer to that after this. Loveline, I'm Adam Corolla, very special in-studio guest tonight, Dr. Drew. Co-author of the Dr. Drew and Adam book.
1:20:32
Drew
The Guide to Love and Life.
1:20:34
Adam
Dr. Drew has been serving the Pasadena area, in Loma Linda area, helping...
1:20:43
Drew
Loma Linda was where Bruce worked.
1:20:44
Adam
Oh, it's for Bruce. Oh, a regular doctor, yes. A regular doctor, Dr. Bruce, from the Loma Linda area. You're the Pasadena area and Altadena area, working with... you do sex therapy?
1:20:58
Drew
No, I'm the love doctor.
1:20:59
Adam
Oh, the love doctor, that's right. That's right. And some addiction medicine. So he's going to stay the full hour. So if you have questions...
1:21:07
Drew
Is that 1143? What time does this show end?
1:21:11
Adam
It's a two-hour show. We do a two-hour show.
1:21:14
Drew
You do it every night?
1:21:15
Adam
We do it Sunday through Thursday night for two hours.
1:21:19
Drew
This is such a good show.
1:21:20
Adam
Oh, you like it?
1:21:21
Drew
Yeah, this is really... I mean, can I come back?
1:21:25
Adam
Sure, sure, you're doing a great job. We've been on the air for many years here in Southern California, especially. Michelle?
1:21:31
Caller
Yeah?
1:21:31
Adam
You're 16. Do you have a question for the doctor?
1:21:35
Caller
Yeah.
1:21:35
Drew
What's up, Michelle?
1:21:37
When I was 14, I started having sex with an 18-year-old. And about four months into it, we kind of broke off and didn't really talk to each other. Nothing big happened, but we just kind of drifted apart.
1:21:55
Drew
You went off to college?
1:21:59
Adam
Huh? He got pulled into Vietnam.
1:22:02
No.
1:22:02
Adam
I see. You just drifted apart. What a wonderful human being. You're 14, he's 18?
1:22:09
Drew
Yeah.
1:22:09
Adam
He's out of high school and you're in the ninth grade?
1:22:13
Yeah.
1:22:13
Adam
Eighth or ninth grade?
1:22:14
Ninth.
1:22:15
Drew
Think of what a colossal idiot that is.
1:22:17
Adam
What a world class prick.
1:22:19
So, but now I have a question about something that happened then because I'm more concerned now and a month after the last time, I didn't have my period and the next month and then the next month and there were four months and I don't know if it was the worry or not but I was getting sick in the morning, I gained weight.
1:22:47
Adam
There was a foot sticking out of her vagina at one point, I was wondering if she was pregnant.
1:22:51
And just my intuition, there was not a doubt in my mind. I definitely thought I was pregnant but then I had my period but it was brought up.
1:23:03
Adam
Did you name it?
1:23:05
No, I was too scared. But I was wondering if there was a possibility that I had a miscarriage.
1:23:13
Drew
At four months?
1:23:14
Adam
Not at four months. I mean, your period wouldn't have been a miscarriage at four months.
1:23:19
Drew
You would have seen something. You would have seen tissue at four months.
1:23:22
Okay.
1:23:23
Adam
You understand?
1:23:24
No chance.
1:23:25
Drew
No, not that there's no chance.
1:23:27
Adam
How stupid are you?
1:23:29
I'm not very stupid.
1:23:30
Drew
How long ago did this happen?
1:23:31
Adam
Did you say moderately stupid?
1:23:33
No, I'm like on a roll, you know, active in school. You totally wouldn't guess.
1:23:39
Adam
All right. But what I mean is, is if you had four months worth of fetus in you, you couldn't just, you know, dab that up with some toilet paper. You know what I mean?
1:23:50
Yeah.
1:23:50
Adam
I mean, you would have seen something unless the thing is, you know, clung to the inside of you somehow and is, is still there, fossilizing.
1:23:59
Drew
Which can happen.
1:24:00
Adam
Oh, yes.
1:24:00
Drew
And so it is important you get a pelvic exam, make sure everything's okay. But there's no way if everything's out now to test for it that far, that long ago.
1:24:09
Adam
All right, Michelle.
1:24:10
Okay.
1:24:11
Adam
You have a new guy?
1:24:13
Um, I have a long distance thing.
1:24:15
Adam
Really?
1:24:16
Yeah.
1:24:16
Adam
Where does he live?
1:24:18
Um, Seattle.
1:24:19
Adam
Oh, where are you?
1:24:20
Um, I'm in the Sacramento area.
1:24:23
Drew
Bill Gates.
1:24:24
Adam
That's not that far. But it is when you're 16. How old is he?
1:24:27
Drew
35.
1:24:29
He's 17.
1:24:30
Adam
All right. All right. Good times. Don't tell him this story.
1:24:33
He already knows.
1:24:33
Adam
All right. Good times.
1:24:34
He's been there for the whole thing.
1:24:36
Adam
Yeah. That's right. Listen, why, why, oh, okay. Thanks. You know, let me tell you something. Guys spend entire relationships keeping things from women, and women tell guys stuff, all the junk, all that horrible stuff. And when you're 17, it just screws with your mind. As a guy, you know what I mean? You're in the first time, you're your girlfriend, you're in love, and she's talking about, my stepbrother used to come into my room, and you're like, oh, God, no, God, no.
1:25:04
Drew
But then you're like, yeah?
1:25:06
Adam
What do you mean come into your room? Well, he was a few years older, and he was, he used to go to military school, but he used to come stay with us on weekends. And so he used to come into my room, and it's like, but we didn't have sex. But I just blew him. And then he used to play a drum while I blew him. And it's like, they start giving me this weird stuff. And he played the snare drum while I gave him oral. And he used to balance the drum on my head. And he'd be like, oh.
1:25:38
Drew
No, you're thinking, you're thinking, I'm gonna kill him, I'm gonna get him.
1:25:42
Adam
No, here's how the thought goes. I'm gonna kill this guy, and then you go, wait a minute, I'm gonna kill myself. No, wait a minute, I'm gonna kill you. Oh Christ, oh, screw it. But it's like, oh, why did I, why now, oh, why did you? Come on, listen, girls, girls, I don't know, I haven't said it in a while, don't tell guys all the weird ass you've been through. Don't tell them, don't tell them, don't tell them that the 26 year old guy you were with when you were 11 for three years, don't tell them about the affair you had with when your dad's work buddies when you were 17. Don't tell them about that time you went to, you basically effed your way through Europe when you were backpacking as a junior in college. Don't don't tell them, don't tell them, don't tell them about the miscarriages and the abortion. Just don't tell them. You're allowed to say you had other boyfriends, don't get anything specific, and don't get all the weird stuff. It freaks the guys out. And every time it's the same, oh no no no no no no, I wanna know, no it's cool, no it's good, I gotta kill myself. Am I right, Drew? Yeah. I mean is there anything that you ever wanted to know? Do you know what I mean?
1:26:51
Drew
But then you're always asking.
1:26:53
Adam
You're always asking like a retard. And now, now I'm 36, I don't wanna know anything.
1:26:58
Drew
You never got anything you wanted.
1:27:01
Adam
I listen, I go on a first date, the chick opens her mouth, I'm gonna have, no no! I just want, no!
1:27:08
Drew
Just wanted the salad.
1:27:11
Adam
Okay, all right, all right, salad. All right, but that's it, right?
1:27:16
Caller
Now, yeah, one time, no, no, no! No, ah, ah, I don't wanna hear it.
1:27:22
Adam
I don't wanna hear it.
1:27:27
Caller
Yeah?
1:27:28
Adam
You're 18?
1:27:29
Caller
Yes.
1:27:30
Adam
All right, what's up?
1:27:31
Caller
Um, okay, like, I have like one breast, like really large.
1:27:35
Drew
You have one? Yeah.
1:27:36
Adam
One breast is large.
1:27:37
Caller
Yeah, larger than the other, like you could totally tell.
1:27:40
Drew
You're 18?
1:27:41
Caller
Yeah.
1:27:41
Adam
And you have a third that's in between?
1:27:43
Caller
No.
1:27:44
Adam
No.
1:27:45
Drew
It's very common.
1:27:46
Caller
No, like, and like, no, you can really tell, like, when I wear a t-shirt.
1:27:49
Drew
Right, it's very common, Monica, and it's one of the more common problems that plastic surgeons are asked to deal with. And you're still 18, you might wait a couple more years, there could be some change with time, but if it's something that really bothers you, it's something that can be corrected.
1:28:03
Caller
Okay, like, and the larger one, I get really bad pains, like, where I can't stand it.
1:28:08
Adam
How big is the bigger one?
1:28:10
Caller
Like, one is like, maybe a C cup, and the other one's a B.
1:28:14
Drew
Where's the pain?
1:28:15
Caller
It's in the larger one.
1:28:16
Drew
But where, all throughout it?
1:28:18
Caller
Like, on the bottom part.
1:28:20
Drew
Bottom part, do you wear underwire bras?
1:28:22
Caller
Yes.
1:28:22
Drew
Does the bra fit the B size a little better?
1:28:25
Caller
Yeah.
1:28:25
Drew
Okay, that's why you're getting pain.
1:28:28
Caller
Okay.
1:28:29
Drew
You gotta wear something that fits the C better, okay?
1:28:31
Adam
You can move up to the C and stuff the B.
1:28:33
Caller
Okay.
1:28:34
Drew
And the underwire might be digging in a little bit.
1:28:36
Caller
Oh, okay.
1:28:37
Adam
Yeah. You go over wire. That's my mind. All right?
1:28:41
Caller
All right.
1:28:41
Adam
All right, baby. Take care. Thank you. I just can't stop thinking about that information that chicks give you that you don't need.
1:28:49
Drew
I can only think about it because the feeling that comes with it is so unpleasant.
1:28:52
Adam
Here's all the mistakes, guys. First off, don't start getting into the story trading thing for the chicks. They'll always trump yours. You know why they'll trump yours? Because they're a chick. And what I mean is...
1:29:03
Drew
If you were a chick, you could trump her.
1:29:05
Adam
What I'm saying is, you'll get into that story. You know that story? You've been dating for about three or four weeks. You've gotten it on a couple of times. Where's the craziest place you ever made love? And you're like, once I did it on my parents' service porch when they were out of town. And you're like, what about you? And they're like, pool table, Hell's Angel bar. And you're like, no, no. Yeah, it was a couple of guys. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, no more, no more. Yeah, yeah, the guy, one guy used to pool cue on it. He used to use a stick on it. Oh, oh, oh, no, no, no. You get into that or you get into like, what, what position do you like? I mean, is this one of your good position? Oh yeah, this is, I love that. Well, I don't do doggy anymore. Oh yeah, why not? Um, this one guy is always some guy named Curve, like, well, he was pretty big and he used to like to do that amyl nitrate while he was, you know, he'd pop those things while he was...
1:30:06
Drew
He used to scare me.
1:30:07
Adam
He was on me and kind of scare me. He hurt me. He hurt me pretty good. And, um, and then I found out he videotaped the whole thing and he never gave it back. So I lowered nose, him and his buddy's still watching. He can burn in hell.
1:30:18
Caller
And you're like, oh, oh.
1:30:20
Drew
But would you agree that by around 35, uh, guys kind of catch up?
1:30:24
Adam
Yeah, by 35, 35 chicks like, uh, listen, I, uh, I, uh, I blew a rugby team, uh, week before I met you. Like, yeah, yeah, all right, fine, good, good. I banged a prostitute when I was in Mexico. Fine. Man, we even you want more?
1:30:46
Caller
Are you good? Did you do?
1:30:48
Adam
Did you nail one of my friends? Yeah, I nailed all of them.
1:30:52
Caller
Fine.
1:30:53
Adam
I banged a few of their girlfriends and one of their moms. We're good? You want more? You're okay? Good. Let's watch more TV. Just forget about it. I know, your young ass, all those retarded questions never ends, and it just hurts right in your gut. Right in your gut. One of my first girlfriends had a boyfriend who like raped her. It wasn't really rape. It wasn't like a stiletto. It was like, he did this, and she can always talk about it. It was always like an issue. It always come up.
1:31:25
Caller
You had no empathy for raping back then, did you?
1:31:28
Adam
Jesus Christ. He raped you. He raped me too. Now I'm being raped. Thanks a lot. I don't blame the guy for raping her. I blame her for telling me about the rape. See, that's mature. That's the essence of maturity.
1:31:42
Drew
Nice.
1:31:42
Caller
You are an asshole. All right.
1:31:44
Adam
We're going to take a little commercial rape, and we'll be back after this. Well, there you have it, another fantabulous episode of Loveline, and I want to thank our guest, Dr. Drew, for coming by the studio, staying both hours.
1:32:11
Drew
I'd like to come back.
1:32:13
Adam
Well, we'll have you back. We usually wait about six months before we turn over, but we'll have you back. You can plug, or whenever you have a project, a lecture, another book, or one of these things that come, a calendar or something coming out, feel free to come on the show and plug that.
1:32:29
Drew
My calendar's really coming out soon, yes.
1:32:30
Adam
It was nice. I've seen it at the MTV stuff, but it was nice seeing you in person. You're a little taller, a little heavier than I imagined, and older than I thought too, and a little gassier. But it was good to see you. I want to thank Lauren and Lauren's mom for coming in tonight, doing a wonderful job, sitting there distracting me the entire show with that feminine presence, and of course Anderson. Until next time, it's Adam Corolla for a possible new partner. Oh, and lit tomorrow night, everyone.
1:32:59
Drew
Oh, that would be nice.
1:33:00
Adam
And Dr. Drew saying mahalo.
1:33:02
Drew
I love you too, man.
1:33:04
Caller
This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.