Episode 1000754886959

1:02 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:59 Caller Yeah, we like to cover all the bases.

2:04 Adam And it just seems like everyone's from Long Beach, everyone seems to have known each other for a hundred years, and it's kind of like part band, part posse, right?

2:15 Caller Vama, yeah.

2:16 Adam Yeah, and they're going to be at the Inland Invasion, which is coming up this Saturday. Where the hell is that, Drew?

2:23 Drew DeVore.

2:24 Adam In DeVore?

2:25 Drew Yeah.

2:25 Adam Boy, is that ugly name for a city.

2:27 Yeah.

2:28 Adam What does that even mean?

2:29 Drew I'm not sure there is a city there.

2:31 Adam Is DeVore a city?

2:32 I don't know.

2:32 Adam Well, the point is, is there's... Who else is on this, Bill? There's a lot of big bands on this...

2:36 Caller .two mountains.

2:38 Adam DeVore is?

2:38 Caller Yeah.

2:40 Adam Right. Yeah, it's like on a fault line or something out in the Southern California area. And the new CD which I have right in front of me is called Wonders of the World. We're going to hear something off of that. Now that's not out until September 11th, so you'll have to wait just a little bit, but we will give you a sneak preview of a couple of songs. And I'll also give you guys some dates around the country where you can find Long Beach Dub All Stars coming to a town near you. So with that being said, I'd interview the band, but I don't have anything to say right now.

3:16 Drew You don't have your wits about you.

3:17 Adam No. I was going to say I'm a little off my game, but I'm rarely on my game. But I'm further off my game than I normally am tonight.

3:25 Drew You have a weird day?

3:27 Adam No. I had a surreal and bizarre experience. Not really bizarre, but sort of uncomfortable and strange. I decided I should get one of these hands-free systems for my car, where I can talk and not hold the phone up into my ear. So I had the guy at the dealer install it in the car, and we were sitting in the parking lot while he was showing me how to run the thing. And he said, all right, just give me a number, for instance. Like somebody you call. And I said, I didn't know what to say. And I thought, I don't want to give my home number because I don't want this guy to call me at home. So I said, my grandma. So I said, here's my grandma's number. And so he said, you talk into it. So you go, now it's weird when you talk into a computer, you can't use your normal voice. You've got to yell at the steering wheel, grandma! And it goes, aunt, number. Then I yelled the number into it, and he says, all right, there it is. It's logged in the thing. That's cool. So a minute and a half later, I'm pushing buttons trying to figure stuff out. He's still sitting here as a 300 pound Chinese guy, sitting in my car with me. We're both sweating bullets because the car's just parked out in the sun and he's 300 pounds and he's heating up the car. And I push a button, all of a sudden the phone's ringing. And I'm like, what's going on? And it's just ringing. I can hear it over the speakers. And I hear my grandma pick up the phone. And she's got like laryngitis. So she sounds, she normally sounds old, but she sounds like death on the phone. And there's this 300 pound Chinese guy sitting next to me. And she's like, hello? And I'm like, I don't want to get into the technology because you know, grandparents, you know, they get freaked out. Even the call waiting freaks them out. You know, like we go, I got someone on the other line. Who? What? You know, they don't understand the concept. So I was like, hey, grandma, it's Adam. She's like, hello? I'm going to come out there and see you tomorrow at 3.30. All right. OK. All right, grandma, I'll see you later. And she's like, wait a minute. I'm like, OK. Um, you got to don't come by at 3. Anyway, we start getting in this full conversation and this big Chinese guy is just sitting there listening to me yell at my grandma through the steering wheel. And I keep wanting to say, like, hey, I'm in my car. I'm talking into the steering wheel. There's a fat Chinese guy sitting next to me. It's a long story, but I know it's not going to translate. So I keep trying to wrap it up. And I don't know what it is, but when people feel you wrapping up, people, when people over 60 feel you wrapping up, they wrap down.

6:01 Drew Yeah, here you go. Okay, and they're like, um, just a second.

6:04 Adam One more thing, your mother called, she wants to know if it's okay if we have carrot cake instead of lemon. That's fine. And you start doing that thing where you go, that's fine, anything's fine. And I'd like to put a sprinkler key in your liver. Great, great, I'll bring the sprinkler key. I'll see you tomorrow, hold on. Now I canceled my appointment tomorrow, so I'm going to be home, okay, I'll see you whenever. And I kept trying to wrap it up. I know she's home listening right now. I swear to Christ, I should call her just so we can hear her voice because it would kill you. And I don't know what it is, but this 300-pound Chinese guy listening to me argue with my grandma who has laryngitis through my steering wheel. It's a weird thing. It's throwing my whole day off. And I keep wanting to say something to him, but I don't know what to say to him.

6:50 Drew And it's like, you can't, you're in.

6:52 Adam All right. So I just, I know. But what is it with people over 60 that when you're trying to rap?

6:57 Drew Hey, you sat next to me as I've tried to rap a few calls and you've actually yelled into the phone.

7:02 Adam I grabbed Drew's cell phone, yelled one of his patients once because we're in the back of a limo and he tried to wrap it up like 15 times. And they just kept going once more around the park. How is it that when people don't understand that wrap up voice, you know what I mean? We all heard it, right? Okay, then I'll be seeing you tomorrow. No problem.

7:20 Drew All right.

7:21 Adam Wait a minute. Which way are you driving over? You're going by the Gelson's. I want you to swing. Okay, no problem. Just kept going around and around and I don't know what it was, but the big Chinese guy in my seat next to me was throwing my game off, so I have to apologize.

7:36 All right, so we'll be getting some calls now, okay.

7:40 Adam Did you hear Anderson?

7:41 Drew Yeah.

7:41 Adam Yeah, good. I never know, by the way, Anderson, when you're talking, whether everyone can hear you or it's just me, so I'm not sure whether to react to it or not.

7:49 Drew Okay, so we'll be getting to some calls now. I've asked him to include us all.

7:53 Adam Oh, you have.

7:53 Drew Glory, yeah.

7:54 Adam So Anderson, when you talk, everyone can hear you.

7:56 Drew Yeah.

7:56 Adam Fantastic. Never talk again. All right, let's talk to Abby who's 21.

8:03 Hi.

8:03 Adam Hey.

8:04 What's up?

8:05 Adam Hey, say hi to Long Beach Dub All-Stars.

8:07 Hi, Long Beach Dub All-Stars.

8:09 Hello, Abby. Hi, Abby Normal.

8:12 Okay, so here's my problem. I've been with my boyfriend for about two years and I really love him. But every time we're just hanging around the house or whatnot, he always wants to mess around. And I don't know, I mean, I'm comfortable with it sometimes, but he'll like go for the kill. I'll be like, please don't, blah, blah, blah.

8:31 Drew How many days a week is this?

8:33 Well, I don't know, like three or four, I guess.

8:36 Drew So this is that thing the guys get into where they start hounding their partners.

8:41 Adam Is going for the kill that's intercores?

8:44 Well, going, you know, intercores and, you know, just trying to get downstairs.

8:48 Drew The point is nothing that turns a woman off more than this sort of, I need you, that feeling the guys get into. Does he understand that you need a little more than that to get things sort of rolling?

8:58 Well, I mean, I think he understands.

9:00 Drew No, no, no, guys don't understand that.

9:03 Adam What do you mean? Do you think she needs more than that or you think she's just tired? Is that what you're looking for?

9:08 Well, honestly, I get kind of bored if we're doing anything physical. I don't know if it's just because it's just normal routine or what.

9:17 Drew Maybe just not into this guy.

9:19 Adam I'm going with that.

9:20 Oh, no, but I mean, I feel that I love him. I mean, and we just got promise rings for each other.

9:28 Drew Your body is telling you something a little different, though.

9:30 I don't know. I guess. I just don't know the polite way to say no, thank you over and over again because I don't want to start a fight.

9:39 Adam OK, but wait a second. So it's not Drew's original assertion that there's no that he's rushing through the four plates, that you're not really interested in intimate contact with him in any form.

9:49 Drew You're lesbian.

9:49 Adam Drew, please.

9:50 Drew How many times a week would it be OK with you? It would not bore you? Once a week, once a month? Never?

9:58 Once or twice a month is good for me. I don't know. I don't have to have it constantly.

10:03 Adam That ain't love.

10:04 Caller That's not a good sign. I think especially if you're trading promise rings, you should be doing it and enjoying it at least once a day.

10:13 Adam That ring means you promised to give him a blowjob. You didn't read the fine print on the inside of the band.

10:21 I have no problem doing it. It's just that he wants it constantly.

10:24 Adam I know, but hold on a second.

10:26 Drew She goes back and forth between this, I'm not into it at all, I'm not into it with him, and just the way he hounds me, I'm not into it.

10:32 Adam By the way, how old is this guy?

10:35 He's 21, which is normal.

10:37 Adam He's 21, you're 21. Him wanting it a couple of times a week is not wanting it constantly. It feels like it because you don't want it constantly.

10:45 Caller Well, I mean, I just want to have a conversation. I want to actually talk and he doesn't want to.

10:51 Drew Is it him or is it that's what she's certain kind of contact she needs? I can't tell.

10:55 Adam I think it's a combination. I think he's your average 21-year-old guy, who sort of wants what he wants. And she is not really all that into him and maybe not all that into sex. You think it's just sex you're not into, Abby?

11:11 Caller I think so. I mean, I've been with other people.

11:14 Drew You know, people that look at what women want, one of the things that they seem to always come up with is they want meaningful conversation. Really, they want conversation about things that sort of have emotional content. And they want that more than sex, if they put it on a scale. Many women. And this is a more extreme version of that, I think.

11:35 Caller It tends to make sex better, too, if you guys can talk about things, you know, and enjoy each other in other ways. It makes your relationship better.

11:43 Caller Yeah, I guess. I don't know. I just feel sometimes the relationship is like what he likes to do. And I just kind of feel war down, you know? I feel like I'm breaking my will.

11:52 Adam You feel like this guy's steamrolling you a little.

11:55 Caller Yeah.

11:55 Adam And you're probably a little angry, and that's why you're closing down.

11:58 Drew And it may well be that she's just not that into this guy.

12:01 Adam And maybe you're not that into him. How long have you been with him? Two years?

12:04 Caller Yeah, a little over two years, but we broke up for six months.

12:07 Drew Why?

12:09 Caller Because he decided he wanted to find a girl who would have sex with him every day.

12:15 Adam And are you angry, Adam, about that?

12:17 Caller You know what? I'm not really, because she was really ugly, so I don't really have an issue with it.

12:22 Drew Oh my God.

12:23 Adam I love, you know, it's a weird angle to play. Chicks do that all the time. They go either, I'm not mad because she was a pig, or they go, I can't believe he cheated with her. She's ugly.

12:36 Drew Yeah.

12:37 Adam A guy, you never heard a guy go, yeah, some guy was porking my old lady. Don't worry about it. He's a big, fat slob. I don't care. You know, it's like, for a guy, I think it makes it worse when the guy, big, fat, bald, hairy guy banging my old lady.

12:52 Caller Oh no.

12:53 Adam No, it was cool. It was ugly. Smelly, sweaty guy, you know. Does that make it okay because he was ugly? She can't be, she can't mean that.

13:03 Drew But that is a-

13:04 Adam She's angry.

13:04 Drew No, that is a strange competitive thing we have sometimes.

13:07 Adam Aren't you angry? You must be angry at the guy for-

13:11 Caller I guess I'm upset that she interrupted our relationship. That's about it. I mad at him for just going out with her because she would have stuck with him whenever he wanted it.

13:22 Adam Okay. All right. Well, so, Abby, I think what it is is you're a little angry at this guy and there's some unfinished business and you're not really bringing it up.

13:29 Caller Well, I try and he just throws a fit. He's like, well, why does this always have to come and bite me in the butt? Blah, blah, blah.

13:35 Drew I just don't think there's much of a relationship here.

13:37 Adam Break up.

13:37 Drew I really don't.

13:38 Caller Well, did you guys have a lot of sex before this breakup or is this just-

13:42 Caller I mean normal amount, like maybe twice a week.

13:46 Drew And you like that then?

13:47 Caller Well, yeah, because during that time we were experimenting a lot.

13:50 Drew Yeah, so you like to-

13:53 Adam You're not that into it.

13:54 Drew It's not working.

13:54 Adam Just break up. Too much crap under the bridge, too. All right, that's it. Break up. And also, I don't know, tell me what you guys think of this. I'm 37 now. I don't have half of the crappy and weird energy I had when I was 21. At 21, I could have never got past something like this. I mean, if someone screwed around on me, I could have never forgave and forgot or whatever the tense is. I don't think you can do it at 21 as a guy. I think you got too much energy.

14:27 Drew Too much testosterone, of course, in three or four minutes. No way.

14:29 Adam Right, right. You got to F or fight or get drunk or something. Now, I'm just waiting to die. He's probably a pervert. Well, she's mad at him.

14:39 Caller I don't think it's a pervert to be wanting sex once a day.

14:42 Adam Yeah, well, I think that'll break up.

14:44 Caller I'm not young.

14:45 Adam Yeah, that ain't that bad.

14:46 Caller You get zits if you don't excrete other bodily fluids.

14:49 Adam Oh, is that it? Is that what that puss is?

14:52 Caller I think that's what that's.

14:53 Drew Is semen coming to the surface?

14:54 Adam It could be, yeah. Yeah. You guys, Bud, get on your mic there. Would you please? There you go. Justin?

15:00 Yeah.

15:01 Adam You're 32?

15:02 Caller Yeah.

15:03 Adam What's up?

15:05 Caller Actually, Drew, this is for you. All right. I was diagnosed with epididymitis about four months ago. And prior to that, I had a couple of experiences with blood in my cum.

15:18 Drew Mm-hmm.

15:19 Caller And basically, it still hasn't entirely cleared up. Like, I mean, like, I'm like Abby. I like to come once a day, basically.

15:29 Drew You're like Abby's boyfriend?

15:31 Caller Pretty much, yeah.

15:32 Drew Not Abby. Abby could care less about that.

15:33 Caller Well, exactly. I'm not like Abby at all.

15:36 Adam Hold on. Where are you from?

15:38 Caller I'm from England.

15:39 Adam Oh, okay.

15:39 Drew London.

15:41 Adam Yeah. He sounds like he's affected, but he could have just been gay. I wasn't sure.

15:45 Caller I am affected and I am gay.

15:47 Adam Oh, let's see.

15:48 Drew That's right.

15:48 Caller I'm gay so you spawn.

15:49 Adam Let me tell you something about gay in my sense. Gay trumps all. It trumps black, it trumps Mexican, it trumps all nationalities.

15:58 Drew You're gay.

15:58 Adam The gay is the first thing I experienced. Guy could call in, could have born and raised in Liverpool. I would hear gay if he was gay before I heard the Liverpool.

16:07 Drew Gay males only.

16:08 Adam Gay males. Yeah, I hear gay above all nationalities. I heard a little something, but mainly I heard gay and I couldn't figure out where the other part was.

16:16 Drew I heard London, England.

16:17 Adam Damn. I see, Drew, you don't have a good sense like I do.

16:20 Drew Just not.

16:20 Adam Justin?

16:21 Caller Yeah.

16:22 Adam All right. So you like to come a lot.

16:24 Drew Did you have any sexually transmitted disease history?

16:27 Caller Not that I'm aware of, no. Although when they diagnosed me with epidermitis, it was like, I mean, I had to go to the emergency room. It was so severe and they gave me a shot. And therefore, I mean, I was never tested, but...

16:40 Drew It usually is, often is the result of a sexually transmitted disease. And once the bacteria, again, the inflammation gets going, it's very hard to clear up. Sometimes takes weeks or even months of antibiotic and anti-inflammatories. And on top of that, sometimes medication to help your bladder empty more fully and freely. So the whole area is sort of flushed out, let's say. It's not restricted in any way.

17:02 Adam That's not a sexually transmitted disease, is it?

17:04 Drew It's a complication of one, yeah.

17:05 Adam Oh, it's a complication. But can you get it without it? Can you get an infection?

17:09 Drew You can, but other bacteria can get up there, yeah.

17:12 Adam Justin?

17:12 Drew But it's usually because of a lot of activity. Often, often.

17:15 Caller Well, they don't.

17:16 Drew They are callers, anyway.

17:17 Adam You have a boyfriend? No. Are you one of these gay guys that just gives the blowjobs? Are you into everything?

17:25 Caller Um, you know, it depends.

17:28 Adam I see, you're open to everything.

17:30 Caller Well, that's not true. There's things I prefer to do.

17:33 Adam Right.

17:34 Caller But, um, I mean, I'm not, I don't sleep around that much. That's why the doctor actually said it needn't be.

17:40 Drew It doesn't have to be. No, it does not have to be. But it often is.

17:44 Caller Yeah.

17:44 Drew And you've got to take a long course of antibiotics, a long course of anti-inflammatories.

17:49 Caller Because he just gave me like two weeks worth and, you know, kind of sent me packing.

17:53 Drew No, no. You need to see a urologist.

17:55 Caller Well, that's who I saw, but he seemed to care less.

17:58 Drew No, you got to keep. These things can be very difficult to clear up sometimes. You got to keep going back till it's all done.

18:03 Adam Hey, Justin, I got a question for you. What? In England, isn't your John Doe, Joe Blogs? Do you know what I mean?

18:15 Caller Yeah, yeah, yeah, Joe Blogs, yeah.

18:17 Adam Don't you love that? You know what our John Doe is here? We find some stiff floating in the river with no idea he's a John Doe or Jane Doe. Over there, it's Joe Blogs.

18:27 Caller Yep.

18:27 Drew How do you spell Blogs?

18:29 Adam B-L-O-G-G-S?

18:30 Caller I think it's double G, yeah.

18:32 Adam I like that. I don't know why. I'd like that.

18:35 Drew I'd like that.

18:35 That's Boggs.

18:36 Adam Joe Blogs. I'd like to be that to be the universal replace John Doe.

18:41 Drew Yeah, there should be some international standards, shouldn't there?

18:43 Adam There really should. So there, you know, now with all this international news and everything, there wouldn't be confusion. I mean, you'd be looking like if you said here, Joe Blogs, some Joe Blogs was found in the river, we'd be looking for Joe Blogs. All right. What's up there, Justin?

18:56 Caller Yeah, quickly. So does it, I mean, will it make any difference if I, if I have sex now or if I don't or?

19:03 Drew Hard to say. You can have sex, not that you can't, and you might want to wear a condom to sort of keep things from being, you know, irritated, that kind of thing. And again, I use, sometimes use medicines like Hytren, help the bladder after more fully, use Naprosan, those kind of anti-inflammatories, and then long course of antibiotics.

19:22 Adam Larry? Larry?

19:24 Hey.

19:24 Adam Hey, you're 14, you're on the Long Beach Double All Stars.

19:29 Caller Hi, Long Beach.

19:30 Caller Hey, Larry.

19:32 Caller I'm like really nervous right now.

19:34 Adam You're 14, that's a little young to be named Larry, isn't it?

19:37 Caller I don't know.

19:38 Adam Anyone in your family named Larry?

19:40 Drew No.

19:40 Adam Huh, you're gonna see a young guy named Larry.

19:43 Drew And they have to start with that name, right?

19:45 Adam I guess they're a new batch of Larrys. All right, go ahead.

19:48 Caller Well, I'm almost 15, my voice hasn't changed whatsoever, and I, like, laugh like a girl a lot. How long should I wait till I go to the doctor and like get testosterone shots or something?

19:58 Drew No, no, no. You're fine here. That the later puberty correlates with being taller and living longer.

20:07 Adam It does?

20:08 Caller Longer Johnson.

20:09 Adam Taller too?

20:10 Drew Yeah, because the gross birth comes later, yeah.

20:13 Adam And why living longer? Because it's like, I don't know, the clock starts ticking at puberty.

20:19 Drew I've just seen that correlation out there.

20:21 Adam All right. You may get six months or something.

20:23 Drew Yeah. It may be just a statistical thing.

20:26 Adam But you're fine.

20:26 Drew Yeah, you're fine. You got a lot of time to go before it's a real serious medical issue.

20:30 Caller Lair, I got a suggestion for you. Take the dog out for a walk a little more often and scream right before he's ready to, that'll help your vocal cords.

20:42 Adam Oh, really?

20:43 Caller Yeah. Yeah. It has something to do with the contractions that you have and then using your diaphragm and then you can get a deeper.

20:52 Adam Try one of those, Lair. Try. Okay. Ready? Go.

20:56 Caller But do it when your parents aren't there because then you have to hide your magazines and stuff.

21:01 Adam All right, Lair. You're not masturbating, are you?

21:04 Caller No.

21:05 Adam All right. Why don't you give it a try? Yeah, so you can get that raw thing. All right?

21:10 Caller Okay.

21:11 Adam All right. Good times, everybody.

21:12 Drew Thanks.

21:12 Adam All right.

21:13 Drew He may not have anything to come out yet.

21:15 Adam No, he may not.

21:17 Drew His all adrenal-mediated stuff, dude. Testosterone hasn't really come in yet.

21:21 Adam If you gave him a couple shots of testosterone, could you speed that process up? He wouldn't do it, but could you?

21:27 Drew Yeah, but you might screw up the whole thing. I mean, you might screw up his growth spurt and everything.

21:32 Adam But just for kicks, if you wanted to get a kid.

21:34 Drew Yeah, just for fun, you could do that.

21:36 Adam Could you jump start a kid into puberty if he was 13 and a half?

21:42 Drew No, you could get the body responding as though, but then it would still be a while before it turned back on by itself.

21:50 Adam Emilio?

21:51 Caller Yeah, I just had a question for Long Beach The Ball Stars.

21:53 Adam Here they is.

21:54 Caller I just wanted to thank you guys, because you guys have completely changed my life. I've had lots of troubles at home, and I'm kind of nervous right now, but your music has really helped me get through these tough times. And I learned how to play drums after Bud Gaw, the great Bud Gaw right on time. And my mom was going to drive me up to the Inland Invasion on Saturday, like in an old beat up Reliant K.

22:17 Caller Get down.

22:19 Caller Yeah, we have lawn seats, and I don't know if you guys could hook us up with something better, like some passes, because over here, like radio stations, they just give out backstage passes with a free limo right up there. Like they don't really deserve it, you know.

22:33 Drew What's going on at home for you?

22:34 Adam Well, how do you know they don't deserve it?

22:36 Caller Because it's just a bunch of luck. I've been dedicating, like, I don't know. I've seen them at the Sparkles Theater at the Warped Tour. Like I spent all my money on eBay getting like their videos and posters and this and this and that.

22:48 Adam Right.

22:49 Drew What's going on at home that's been so tough?

22:50 Caller Well, like there's lots of like domestic abuse. My dad's an alcoholic, and like we've been neglected a lot because both my friends work.

22:59 Adam So is your dad still living at home? Yeah, but is he is he off the sauce or is he still drinking?

23:05 Caller Where's my bourbon?

23:07 Caller He's still drinking.

23:08 Adam Yeah.

23:08 Caller Hardcore because he just got off like for six months, but he's just right back on it right now.

23:12 Adam So what's he do that he gets off for six months?

23:16 Caller Well, like we just made a bet like he couldn't do it.

23:19 Adam Oh, he got off booze for six months and he did it for six months.

23:23 Caller But then like, I don't know for some reason, he just goes back and does it again.

23:27 Adam Well, you should have made it a year.

23:29 Drew Ten years.

23:30 Adam Well, he made it to six months though.

23:32 Caller Yeah.

23:33 Adam Was he a change man during that six months?

23:35 Caller We got to talking better. We started fixing up my room and stuff. We just bonded a little bit, but all of a sudden he just starts again.

23:42 Adam Yeah. All right. You got a K-car. That's even worse than the alcoholism. It really is. I'd rather grow up with an alcoholic father than a K-car.

23:54 Caller Last week, my mom was driving on the freeway, and a tire fell out from a truck on the other side of the freeway, and it hit her.

23:59 Drew Oh my God.

23:59 Caller Yeah. So now whenever she drives, it wiggles really badly. I don't know. We're just going to try and get up there, but we have lawn seats.

24:06 Adam All right. But how did you get the lawn seats?

24:11 Caller I work. So we bought them down here.

24:14 Adam All right.

24:15 Caller That was the last.

24:17 Adam You want Bud and Opie to set you up with something better than that?

24:19 Caller If they could, yeah.

24:20 Caller Yeah, like.

24:22 Caller Yeah.

24:23 Caller If you can make it down to the front of the stage, just run past all the security guards, I'll pull you up on stage. Yeah.

24:28 Caller Well, you want to know who I am, so.

24:30 Caller Just tell me you're Emilio.

24:32 Caller Yeah. I'll be wearing the Sublime T-shirt.

24:34 Drew Now you're going to have 600 Emilios running past security.

24:37 Adam Right.

24:39 Drew With Sublime shirts.

24:39 Caller All right.

24:40 Adam No, that's as good as they can do.

24:42 Drew How about him hanging out during the sound check before the sound check?

24:45 Caller I want to be there at 8 in the morning.

24:46 Caller You get there at 8 in the morning?

24:48 Caller Yep.

24:50 Adam But nope, we love their fans. Listen, if you can blow a security guard and get backstage, I'll sign a bumper sticker.

24:59 Drew Asshole.

25:01 Adam Jesus Christ, that's it? His mom drives a K-car. His dad's an alcoholic. Come on. You can't do better than that? Something. Come on, we got to help. We got to help Emilio out. He's a fan.

25:12 Caller We can put Emilio on it.

25:13 Caller It's like my early birthday present too.

25:15 Adam Yeah, early birthday present.

25:16 Caller How old are you, Emilio?

25:18 Caller I want to be 17 like next week.

25:20 Adam All right, so can we do something? Can we put him on hold? Put him up with something somehow.

25:25 Caller Put him up with something, something.

25:26 Adam Look, here's what I'm saying. Even if we just put him on hold and blow him off, it sounds cool if you guys go, oh yeah, any fan of ours.

25:33 Caller We'll go to his house and kick his dad's ass.

25:36 Adam Right. That's right. Smash the car and kick dad's ass. Long Beach Dub All Stars are here. Bud and Opie are both here from the band. We're going to take a little break. We'll hear something off of the new CD, Wonders of the World, when we come back and take care of business. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Bud and Opie are both here from Long Beach Dub All Stars. Wonders of the World is the name of the CD. We're gonna hear something off of that CD real soon. You can find the Long Beach Dub All Stars in doing the inland invasion out here for K-Rock on the 25th, that's this Saturday. Then on the 9th of September, they're in San Diego, the street scene. On the 11th, they're at the House of Blues in Anaheim. On the 12th, they're in Phoenix, Arizona, Tucson, Arizona. On the 13th and the 14th, they're in Ventura. So if you're in any of those cities and you want to catch them, look out for them. Those are the dates and I'll give them out a little bit later on in the night, too. Mary?

27:14 Yes.

27:14 Adam You're 24?

27:16 Caller Yes.

27:16 Adam What's up?

27:17 Caller I had a baby about a year ago and I have had no sex drive since I was probably about two months pregnant and I was wondering. I mean, like, the thought of sex makes me want to throw up.

27:27 Drew Interesting. Is this your first baby?

27:29 Caller Yes.

27:29 Drew Are you on any medication?

27:31 Caller No, I'm not.

27:32 Drew Well, have you talked to your doctors about this?

27:35 Caller Yes, I have. And they say maybe when I stop nursing.

27:38 Drew Yeah, that's true. Nursing is part of it. And, hmm, usually at the first year it does come back and if it doesn't, sometimes something as simple as going on the birth control pill can restore it. These are profound changes your body goes through when you're pregnant. And it can have residual effects and it's natural enough, it has effect on your brain and you sometimes need a little assistance with that.

27:57 Adam What's your husband doing?

27:59 Caller I'm single.

28:00 Drew Are you depressed also?

28:01 Caller No, actually I'm probably the happiest I've ever been. I was clinically depressed several years ago.

28:06 Drew But it's not part of a depressive syndrome that's causing you to lose your libido. It's that you're just, the hormones just have changed dramatically, right?

28:12 Adam Who would you get sex from?

28:15 Drew If you could.

28:16 Adam Hypothetically, if you wanted sex.

28:18 Drew Maybe if there was somebody sort of inspiring her, she'd feel more like it.

28:22 Adam Yeah. Who would the penis be attached to if you were to have sex?

28:25 Caller I don't know actually.

28:27 Drew She prefers detachable.

28:28 Caller At this point, I would just like to be able to masturbate or just to feel sexy or.

28:36 Adam While you're masturbating or?

28:39 Caller Just to be able to have an orgasm.

28:41 Adam I see. Right. Simple pleasures. What about the dad? Where's the dad?

28:48 Caller He's around. We're just friends though.

28:50 Adam I see.

28:51 We just didn't work out.

28:52 Adam Is that all right with you?

28:54 Caller Oh, yeah. I wish he would find somebody else.

28:58 Adam Oh, really?

28:59 Caller Yeah.

28:59 Adam That sounds like a dynamite individual.

29:02 Drew A gem. A jewel.

29:04 Adam Is he paying you some money?

29:05 Caller Oh, yeah. He watches the baby when I work. He's a great father.

29:10 Adam Why do you wish he would go away? Or find somebody else?

29:14 Caller He's just obsessive, I guess.

29:18 Adam He's really into you?

29:19 Caller Well, yeah. Like he's still wanting to get back together. And I just, you know, he's, we come from different backgrounds, I guess. And I have different wants and needs in my life. And, you know, he's okay with...

29:33 Adam That's nonsense, by the way.

29:35 Drew He's okay with what?

29:36 Caller With just where he's at, you know.

29:38 Drew He doesn't work.

29:39 Adam He's lazy.

29:40 Caller Yeah.

29:41 Adam There's no count. Is he into, does he smoke a lot of weed?

29:44 Caller Yeah. He does drugs and I can't stand drugs.

29:47 Adam Okay. All right. Well, you got the drug addict watching the kid all day.

29:51 Drew Man, it's a good time.

29:52 Adam Fantastic.

29:52 Drew And you know the child...

29:53 Adam Probably smoke the kid or trade it for a dime bag or something.

29:56 Drew The child's about a 50% chance of inheriting that genetic potential, so.

30:00 Caller Yeah. I know. All right.

30:02 Adam All right. What if he cleaned himself up? Would you want him?

30:06 Caller No. No, he supposedly has cleaned himself up and I think I, for the most part, believe him. As far as I know, he still drinks occasionally, but I don't think he's doing drugs, but he just, he's.

30:19 Drew Did you have a family member that kept missing up or something?

30:22 Caller Did I?

30:23 Yeah.

30:24 Caller No. No, no.

30:26 Adam Why so anti-drug?

30:27 Drew Also anti giving people a chance to get well.

30:31 Caller Because I had dated someone for like three years and I had a codependency with someone who did drugs and would say they got better and didn't get better.

30:40 Drew You don't have a parent, the parent is an alcoholic.

30:42 Caller No, actually my mom's a drug counselor.

30:44 Drew So she was an alcoholic at one time.

30:46 Caller No, no, no. She's a no CSW.

30:48 Adam What about your dad?

30:50 Caller Nope. Doesn't drink. They're grandparents. My grandparents were alcoholics and they, you know.

30:56 Adam Close enough.

30:57 Caller Well, marijuana isn't a drug. It's a plant. I think alcohol is a drug and there's, you know, other drugs, but marijuana is a plant.

31:03 Adam That's right. There's an alcohol, a grain in that case.

31:07 Caller Is that what it is?

31:09 Caller I was wondering, Dr. Drew.

31:10 Adam It all was something.

31:11 Drew What's that, Barry?

31:12 Adam Coke's just a weed.

31:13 Drew Yeah, Coke is. It's a coca leaf. It's just a leaf.

31:16 Adam Listen, Coke's just a leaf and booze is just a grain.

31:19 Drew Opium is just from a poppy flower.

31:21 Adam All right.

31:21 Drew What's that, Barry?

31:23 Adam Bullets is just an ore that is mined from the earth. I mean, it's all natural.

31:30 Drew What's that, Barry?

31:31 Caller I had had a cesarean section in a pretty traumatic birth, and I was wondering if that might be affecting it too.

31:36 Drew Yeah, might be. It all figures in.

31:39 Adam But I think you need to find a guy you're into.

31:41 Drew Also, I think you need to go on some birth control pills. Sometimes that really turns things back on again. It's like your system has been saturated with hormones, and it's taken a while for it to turn back on.

31:51 Adam How about kickstarting yourself by getting out the old vibrator and really seeing what you can stir up downstairs?

31:57 Caller It's not working. That's the problem.

32:00 Adam Yeah, well, you're not focusing, sweetness.

32:03 Drew No, it's like someone being on a serotonin reuptake inhibitor drug. That's how they get. Sex looks like, to a woman, it looks like, where?

32:07 Adam Listen, I've had that. I think we all have. I think I speak for Bud and Opie when I say that we've all had that drunken, not tonight with myself thing, but you grit your teeth and you curl your toes and you really bear down and you squeeze one out, right?

32:23 Caller Yeah, yeah, it's chafed. That's right.

32:25 Adam Your penis may not want to cooperate, but that doesn't matter because the hand rules. You know what I'm talking about?

32:32 Caller Don't they have like, what's that, not Vicodin, but for old men that can't get it up, the Viagra. Viagra, yeah. And does that work for women too?

32:41 Drew It's being steady, it doesn't work as well. Again, for men, it just gives them erection, doesn't give them arousal. She's not getting the organ.

32:48 Adam Yeah, but you're walking around with a rock hard bone, or eventually you're going to get around.

32:51 Caller Maybe you can cross that stuff with ecstasy or something like that.

32:54 Adam Yeah, it's just a plant. That ecstasy is just made, it's just derivative from a leaf, isn't it? You're on that tonight with Dr. Bud. What's up?

33:07 Caller Hey, I got more of a dilemma than a question. It's, I guess for about six years now, on and off, I can't get an erection. And I kind of did the math and I figured out that it was the same time that I was on the Accutane that I couldn't get an erection. I'm sure you're familiar with that, Dr. Drew?

33:23 Drew Actually, usually, oftentimes, not usually, but oftentimes guys report a higher sex drive on Accutane. How much are you taking?

33:31 Caller It's on the MAC dose and I take it six months on, six months off. When I'm off it, I go back to super ugly. I can't get laid for nothing.

33:42 Drew Because of your skin?

33:43 Caller Because of my skin.

33:44 Drew So you're never really resolving. It's never getting better.

33:47 Caller No, it's not getting better. There's no way around it. I have to take this if I want to look good at all.

33:52 Adam What is it from?

33:55 Caller Acne.

33:56 Adam What's the Accutane for?

34:00 Caller You should try some kind of, other than Western medicine, try like an herbologist.

34:06 Adam Yeah, that didn't get rid of zits though, does it? Does it? Would you try it?

34:11 Caller Not for zits, but for skin problems and stuff like that, Chinese herbs, they work a lot.

34:17 Adam Yeah, like acupuncture.

34:19 Drew What did you try, Matt?

34:19 Adam Put the pin right in the zit and drain it.

34:21 Caller Yeah.

34:22 Drew What did you try, Matt?

34:23 Caller That's the maximum I've tried. I even tried that infomercial stuff.

34:27 Drew So you've tried everything?

34:29 Caller I've tried everything.

34:29 Drew And the only thing that works is accutane?

34:31 Caller Only thing that works is accutane.

34:32 Drew Yeah, that's sort of typical.

34:33 Adam All right, so what should he do? I mean, maybe he should get on some Viagra.

34:37 Drew I don't know, he's got to make a choice. I mean, it's...

34:40 Caller Get laid or...

34:42 Drew What about lower dose of accutane chronically? You got to work with someone on this on how to dose it up, and you got to talk to them about the side effects you're having. Do you get depressed when you're on it?

34:50 Caller No, no, I...

34:52 No.

34:52 Drew You just get this one thing, you lose your sex drive.

34:55 Caller Oh, I have a sex drive, it's just when it comes down to the line...

34:58 Drew Can't get an erection.

35:00 Caller Go see an iridologist. Do you have an acupuncture?

35:04 Adam Do you have a... You got a girlfriend?

35:07 Caller No, because I'm off accutane right now.

35:09 Adam You really? Women will go out with a guy with a couple of zits, won't they?

35:12 Caller Straight up tell me, I did not go out with you because you look so bad.

35:17 Adam Really?

35:18 Drew It gets that active when you...

35:20 Caller Extremely. I mean, painful type.

35:23 Adam Yeah. Yeah, listen, kick your dad in the nuts next time you see him. Yeah. That's a bad genes right there.

35:28 Caller Bad genes.

35:30 Adam Your dad has zits?

35:31 Caller Dad and mom. Very, very bad.

35:33 Adam Yeah. You get them on your back?

35:34 Caller Back, ass, you name it, I got it.

35:36 Adam Nice. Holy, let me close my eyes and picture that ass one. You know, I get a doozy on my back once in a while.

35:42 Drew On your back?

35:43 Adam Yeah. There's nothing more gratifying than standing in front of the mirror looking at your gray beard coming in and trying to squeeze a zit on your back. It's like, come on, God, one or the other. Am I old or am I young? Which is it? I'm not going with the gray and the zit. One or the other, in or out. What's it going to be? And the zit's always in a place, I don't know how it is, but there's that little devil's triangle that's right around your, what is it, your scapula. That's right here. It's like, if you go backside, you can get your arm to a certain point. And then if you try to reach around and go over the top, you can reach to a certain point, but there's a little like a two by two area you can't get to on your back, that's where the zit is. The one you can't get, that area you can't get to. How does that work? What would be so bad about, how come I never got a zit on my foot my entire god damn life?

36:33 Drew Wrong kind of skin.

36:35 Adam What's so different between, no, you know why I don't get one on my foot? Because my shoe would cover it. I need a zit where people can see it. Do you know what I'm saying? What kind of plan is that? The big zit on the back that you can't reach to, the one on your nose or your forehead that everyone's staring at? Why not a zit? How come no zit on the front?

36:54 Drew You can get them here.

36:55 Adam You can, but you don't. What's the big difference between the skin on the front and the skin on the back? I really think it's on the back because you can't get there. Do you know what I'm saying?

37:05 Drew Yeah.

37:06 Adam How about a nice zit on my knee that I could just go at with a pair of pliers and a steak knife? That one on the back I can never get to. What is that? What's so different about the skin on the front?

37:17 Drew You get them on the front.

37:18 Adam You can, but you just don't.

37:19 Drew No, some guys get lots of them on the front.

37:22 Adam Some guys do.

37:22 Drew None on the back.

37:24 Adam Okay. Is this the majority of guys? No, this is a very small percentage of guys. I want to know why do the majority get them on the back? I'm not asking, does it ever happen?

37:33 Drew I don't think anybody knows the answer to that.

37:34 Adam All right. Well, you find out. We're going to take a break. Long Beach Dome All Stars here tonight. When we come back, we'll speak to Brittany, who's 17. Let's know our feelings on One Night Stands, and we'll tell her about that after this.

37:50 Loveline will be right back.

38:25 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew over there. But no, oh, oh, oh, oh, we are here from Long Beach Dub All-Stars. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. We're going to hear something off the new CD, which is not out yet. It'll be out September 11th. Wonders of the World is the name of the CD. And what we'll do is I think we'll speak to Brittany, and then we'll hear Sunny Hours, the new song off of Wonders of the World. Brittany?

38:54 Hello?

38:55 Adam Hello?

38:56 Oh, hello.

38:57 Adam Hey. What's up there, Sunshine? You're 17 years old.

39:01 Caller Yeah. Like, just a few minutes ago, my friends and I were all discussing the fact that we've all had between two and five one-night stands in the past month. And we can't really figure out why.

39:15 Drew What does one-night stand mean?

39:16 Caller Like, I had sex with one guy one night, and I haven't seen him since. He was a good friend of mine, but now he doesn't talk to me at all. And then I had sex with another guy when I was out of town, and I haven't seen him. He called me a few times, but I haven't seen him. And then my friends have been doing like the same thing.

39:33 Adam Right.

39:34 Caller And none of like, and it's kind of like a contest now. And it's-

39:38 Drew What do you get out of it?

39:39 Adam Where were these competitions when I was in high school? Hey, you know what the competition was when I was in high school? Let's see who can go the longest without blowing Adam. That was a game that we went around.

39:50 Drew They all won. They all won.

39:53 Adam Everyone's a winner.

39:54 Drew It set quite a record.

39:56 Adam It was a 1500 way tie between everyone who lived in North Hollywood.

39:59 Drew And then you and your friends in the meantime were carrying on a contest to just see who could go the longest without masturbating.

40:04 Adam Well, that was later on in life.

40:06 Drew Oh, I see. Once you'd matured.

40:07 Adam I came in very early.

40:09 Drew Yeah. Brittany, what do you get out of this?

40:12 Caller I don't know. My friends, two of the two girls who I'm doing this with, they've never really had an actual relationship in their entire lives and they think that they get something out of it that way. But me, I just enjoy physical contact, I guess.

40:26 Drew But you both guys, you mentioned how, I mean, you stood there one night stands and yet you're sort of surprised that they haven't called you, they haven't gotten back to you. The guys did their thing and they were done. That was it. That's how men work.

40:39 Caller Right.

40:39 Drew So why are you surprised that they would not call you or not?

40:42 Caller No, not really that. They didn't surprise me, but me doing this surprises me more than anything.

40:47 Drew Because you want something more.

40:49 Caller I guess. Well, the first guy, he was actually a good friend of mine before that and now he doesn't even speak to me.

40:55 Adam What's up? My attitude is if I'm single and I have sex with somebody and I enjoy it, I'm looking for a second helping or at least getting drunk and calling at some point later in the week, how come this best friend of yours, this good friend of yours has not called back for a little second helping?

41:16 Caller I have no idea.

41:18 Drew Maybe he's weirded out.

41:19 Adam He probably has a girlfriend.

41:21 Drew Yeah.

41:21 Caller No, he doesn't. He called me a day or two after that we had sex because I had gotten grounded after that for a whole another reason. He called me and he just said, we shouldn't have done that because we're both intoxicated at that time.

41:36 Drew All right. So he's saying that the friendship is on shaky grounds, and I'm freaked out.

41:40 Adam Are you a big gal, Brittany?

41:42 Caller I'm tall. I'm 5'11.

41:44 Adam Not wide though, huh?

41:45 Caller No, not really.

41:46 Drew You're fat.

41:47 Adam Drew, please. I just wonder what's up with this guy? We're too good of friends. We were drunk. We shouldn't have done that.

41:54 Caller Maybe he's gay.

41:55 Adam Is he gay?

41:56 Caller I don't know. He hangs out with lots of guys. He lives with four other guys, and they do have some weird jokes going like, I don't know what's going on with those guys.

42:05 Drew Dude, dude, you're so gay.

42:07 Adam Something's off with this guy. He could have been fagging off with himself. I've been known to do that.

42:13 Drew All right.

42:13 Adam So, Brittany, if you want to do it, do it. And if you don't want to do it, don't do it.

42:18 Okay.

42:19 Adam But I think what we've learned from doing this show that young ladies who carry on this way for too long, don't feel too good about themselves eventually.

42:28 Drew And that usually you're looking for something a little more, and what you got to figure out is what do you want from a relationship and get that. This tends, most women find this unsatisfying.

42:36 Right.

42:37 Adam All right.

42:38 Yes.

42:39 Adam All right.

42:39 Thank you.

42:40 Adam Bud, you let some gas go or something?

42:42 Drew No. No, actually I did.

42:44 Adam Oh, that was your stomach?

42:44 Drew Yeah.

42:45 Adam Jesus Christ, Drew.

42:47 Caller The second guy said I was the best he ever had.

42:49 Adam Really?

42:50 Caller Yes.

42:50 Adam And then what's up? Yeah. You popped this cherry too, right?

42:55 Caller No.

42:55 Adam And why doesn't he want a second helping?

42:58 Caller Well, I was out of town at the time and we live like four hours apart.

43:02 Adam Best you ever had. I'd make that drive for him. What's up with guys, by the way, that they can be so sort of casual and laissez-faire about the sex these days? I mean, when I was 17, 18, if I found someone who was the best I ever had, I was on top of that. I was trying to keep that going.

43:20 Caller It was better than drugs.

43:22 Adam Yeah. Yeah. What? It's like, yeah, you were great. Anyway, I'm going to go back across the street and whack off, watch some TV. What is this? What's going on? All right. We're going to hear something from the Long Beach Dub All-Stars. You're cute up there, Anderson. This one is called Sunny Hours. Hey, Loveline, everybody, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. I'm Adam. That's Drew. Opie and Bud are both here from the Long Beach Dub All-Stars. We will hear some more off of Wonders of the World, the new CD out September 11th, and I'll give you those dates where you can find them around the country in just a couple of few. I'll take some phone calls and we're going to talk to Amy. Did I sell her? Let's take a question for the guys. Talk to Dank.

48:42 Caller What's going on, guys?

48:43 Adam Hey, you're 19.

48:44 Caller Hey.

48:46 Caller How's it going, Adam? The man show kills me, man. Got to be the greatest show on TV.

48:50 Adam Why, thank you.

48:51 Caller South Park's pretty decent, though, too.

48:53 Adam Yeah.

48:54 Caller But actually, I called to talk to the Dove All-Stars.

48:57 Drew How weird is that we're just talking about South Park 270?

48:59 Caller When are we going to be on the man show drinking beer?

49:02 Adam Next season. Start filming in January. There you go. Hey, Dank?

49:10 Caller Yo.

49:10 Adam You got a question for the guys?

49:11 Caller Yeah. Actually, I had a couple of questions, actually. I was wondering when you guys, if ever, you're coming back to good old Sacramento. They get ripped with the rest of us up north.

49:20 Caller Good old excremento.

49:22 Caller Yes, sir.

49:24 Caller See, we will be playing close to there for the smokeout.

49:28 Adam San Francisco.

49:29 Caller In San Francisco.

49:30 Caller Frisco, what date's that?

49:31 Caller Uh, I believe...

49:34 Adam We're looking back to the management.

49:36 Caller 13th.

49:38 Caller 13th.

49:38 Adam October. October 13th?

49:40 Caller October 13th, yeah.

49:42 Caller Sweet.

49:43 Caller Yeah, sorry, I wasn't able to catch the Warped Tour, guys, but, uh, work caught me that day. So I definitely gotta catch you, cause I hear you guys play a lot of good old Sublime at your set.

49:52 Caller Yeah, we play some Sublime songs, too.

49:55 Caller How much influence you think Sublime had over your album?

49:58 Caller Well, considering that me and Eric were in Sublime.

50:02 Caller Oh, of course. I mean, of course you guys were in Sublime, but I'm just saying, like, do you guys just try to steer away from some of their stuff, or do you just, like, try to embrace a lot of it?

50:12 Caller If you hear the songs, you'll hear certain influences.

50:15 Caller Yeah, that's great. And I mean, I've always been a diehard Sublime fan, but I just picked up your guys' album a couple years back and really enjoyed that, too. So that right back out, man, some good stuff.

50:26 Caller Thank you.

50:26 Caller And my final question is just, how can I pick up, like, let's see, the 40 ounces CD that never really got released, that had all the, like, all the songs that were on it?

50:38 Caller Oh, the Pre-Musician Cemetery of America release, the actual Skunk Records one?

50:43 Caller Yeah.

50:44 Caller Your best bet is to find it on eBay because it is no longer printed because it's owned by MCA.

50:54 Adam Hey, Dank.

50:55 Caller Yo.

50:55 Adam I just got word that they're going to be in San Francisco September 15th.

50:59 Caller September 15th? That a boy, Adam.

51:01 Adam Yeah. And the 13th of October, I'm guessing. Both dates?

51:04 Caller I'll probably catch them both.

51:06 Adam Well, good. Go do that. And you know what? Dank, don't take this the wrong way, but you sound like the kind of guy who could hang out in Frisco from September 15th to October 13th and probably not get fired from whatever gig you got. They'll probably let you right back into the surf shop or wherever.

51:23 Caller Two joints is about what I'm trying to get into.

51:25 Adam There you go. All right. So we'll see you at the dates.

51:28 Caller Sounds good.

51:29 Adam Take care of yourself. Peace out. Peace out. Peace out.

51:33 Caller Peace out.

51:36 Adam That's what I should have yelled at my grandma today. She just kept yelling, peace out.

51:42 Drew Is that a good times?

51:43 Adam Yeah, is that a good times? Is who? Wait a minute. Who does a smoke out?

51:48 Caller Is that Cypress Hill?

51:49 Adam Is that Cypress Hill?

51:51 Caller Oh, they're going all over.

51:51 Adam Are they going all over?

51:53 Caller Yeah, we're going worldwide.

51:56 Adam Because, well, at least, I mean, Be Real has always come on the show and like Bobo and talked about doing a smoke out here. We never talked about doing it in San Francisco, or at least they didn't.

52:07 Caller It's a tour now.

52:08 Adam Oh, they're touring. Wow, well, smart, what the hell. All right, let's talk to Amy, who's 16. Amy?

52:17 Caller Hello?

52:17 Adam What's up?

52:19 Caller Hey guys, how you doing?

52:20 Adam Good.

52:21 Caller Good, thanks.

52:22 Caller Yeah, I was kind of wondering, how do you know if you've had an orgasm?

52:27 Adam Well, how do I know? My maid usually is the one who tells me it. I swear to Christ, I have to beat my maid home. Do you realize that?

52:37 Drew I beg your pardon.

52:38 Adam I know this sounds pathetic, but I soil a few items during the course of the week, and I leave them strewn about. And my maid comes at 5 o'clock on Monday, and she's got the keys to my house, and I'm not around sometimes, and sometimes when I'm out at 4.45, I look at my watch and I have to hustle back, because I got to beat her to the hamper. She must wonder why I'm doing a load of laundry every time she shows up at my house.

53:06 Caller If I were you, I'd be damn proud.

53:08 Adam Would you? I don't know.

53:11 Caller You sound like that little kid that had to run home.

53:14 Adam The Loneliest Runner, Michael Landon, the TV movie of the week.

53:19 Caller Because he peed the bed.

53:20 Adam That's right. That's the second time that reference has come on. You've got to give me some credit for knowing what you're talking about, right?

53:27 Caller I didn't know the actual name yet. I gave you credit on that one.

53:31 Drew Adam watched it once a week and sits in front of the TV and cries.

53:34 Adam I cry.

53:36 Caller How much did you sell the rights to that movie for?

53:39 Adam I did used to wet the bed when I was a kid. I identified with him, but who came on this show three weeks ago and brought that exact...

53:48 Drew It was a long time ago, I think.

53:49 Adam No, no, no, no. It was... What's his name from BattleBots, I think, who brought that up, if you recall.

53:55 Caller I think if you drink enough of that Australian beer, what's it called? Lucky Lager? No, what's it called?

54:01 Adam Foster's?

54:03 Caller Yeah, you'll pee the bed.

54:04 Adam Oh, really?

54:05 Caller For sure.

54:05 Caller All right.

54:07 Adam I don't need any tips. I do it on my own. I drink stream water. I wet the bed.

54:11 Caller So, Amy, your wedding bed, is that what we're getting here?

54:13 Drew Amy, if you have to wonder whether you've had an orgasm, we generally have found that you haven't had one.

54:19 Adam Right.

54:20 Caller Really?

54:20 Drew Yeah.

54:21 Adam It's kind of like that old joke or whatever, the Rolls Royce dealership, if you have to ask how much, you can't afford it kind of thing. So, if you have to ask, you didn't have one.

54:31 Caller Well, and I've had like a guy go down on me, and I just, it didn't like amuse me, you know?

54:36 Drew You didn't like it?

54:38 Caller I thought it would have felt better, honestly.

54:40 Drew Do you masturbate?

54:43 Yes.

54:45 Drew What a silly question.

54:46 Adam Do you have an orgasm doing that?

54:49 Caller I think I did, but.

54:51 Adam You don't know.

54:51 Caller Does it feel good?

54:52 Adam Yeah.

54:53 Drew One time you did.

54:55 Caller I think maybe more.

54:56 Caller I'm just not sure.

54:58 Adam All right, but let's try to define an orgasm for a woman, because as a guy, it's pretty easy math to do, but for a woman, it can be a little confusing because it's not a byproduct. Wouldn't you say, like I would describe it this way, it feels, there's a good feeling that feels better, better, better up until a point, and then you don't want, then you want to stop.

55:21 Drew But it usually, the better, better usually kind of takes off by itself at a certain point. It has a series of rhythmic contractions associated with that, and then they stop, and then you decide, and then everything's uncomfortable after that.

55:31 Adam That's enough. Right. So that should happen.

55:35 Drew Yeah.

55:35 Adam And you shouldn't be asking. You should know. Right?

55:38 Drew Yeah.

55:38 Adam Okay. So we'll go with no on the orgasm. Brent? Yeah. You're 18?

55:45 Caller Correct.

55:45 Adam What's up?

55:46 Caller Well, here's the deal. While I was out at camp, I met this one girl. It's been about a year, and I lived in California. She lived out here in Colorado. Just now I moved up here, because I'm going to college and she's 14.

56:03 Adam What were you doing at camp?

56:05 Caller It was like a kind of a religious kind of camp place. Nice.

56:10 Drew What were you doing at 17 with a 13-year-old?

56:13 Caller Actually, what it is, is the camp kind of a, everybody's really close. It's all friends, you know, that's a real close camp. Everybody goes out there. I don't know. I really don't know how to explain it.

56:25 Drew Yeah, but the 13-year-old you're dealing with here.

56:28 Caller You are an asshole.

56:29 Adam They're all close.

56:30 Caller It was like a best friend kind of deal.

56:33 Adam Oh, I know. Camp Rape-A-Lot. Indian Tribe.

56:37 Caller I wish.

56:38 Adam I begged my parents to go there when I was in high school.

56:41 Caller Oh, I see. I see. No, it's not like, it's, it's hard to explain.

56:47 Drew Hey, Brent, I'm not asking what you did there, what the camp was about. I'm saying what the hell were you doing on Instagram with a 13-year-old when you were 17?

56:53 Adam We made lanyards and God's Eyes. There was a lot of canoeing.

56:57 Caller What it is is it's a...

56:59 Drew No, I don't want to know what the camp is. I want to know what, oh my God.

57:03 Adam We're Drew, we're very close. It's a lot of good people having a good time. So, why were you doing the statutory rape thing? We all got together.

57:15 Drew It's hard to explain. It was a close, people were really close.

57:19 Adam We did this thing where we roasted marshmallows and we put it between graham crackers and with just a sliver of chocolate and it's called s'mores. Alright, so you want to keep banging away? Go ahead, Drew.

57:35 Drew What were you doing with a thirteen-year-old when you were seventeen? In what world did you think that was okay? Don't answer that. What made you think that was okay?

57:45 Caller It has nothing to do with the relationship at this point. What it is, is we're really good friends. And at the end of camp, she got my number and called me. And at the point that I came over here, she asked if I would be her boyfriend.

58:10 Adam What city does she live in?

58:12 Caller She lives about an hour away from where I'm living now, because right now I'm going to college in Colorado.

58:18 Drew What does that mean, boyfriend?

58:21 Caller Um, I'm pretty sure it's just going out on dates with her.

58:26 Adam Okay. So you didn't, did you have any physical contact with her?

58:31 Caller No.

58:32 Adam Okay.

58:32 Caller I mean, besides hugs and things like that.

58:35 Right.

58:35 Drew And you have no plans for anything more?

58:37 Adam But here's the question, you're in college.

58:40 Caller Right.

58:40 Adam You really want to date a ninth grader when you're in college?

58:44 Drew Junior high school?

58:45 Adam Who lives an hour away?

58:47 Caller The thing that I'm trying to figure out with is, she's a really nice girl and things like that. What I'm trying to figure out would be, is would something like this last until like four years down the road? Would something like this be able to last four years down the road?

59:03 Adam You should hope not.

59:04 Caller Yeah.

59:05 Adam Because there goes your whole college coincidentally.

59:07 Caller Right. I got an answer for you.

59:08 Caller The college that I am going to is not a big school. I mean the college I am going to is a strict business school. There is three girls in the college supposed to like 300 guys.

59:21 Caller He is an idiot.

59:22 Adam All right. Bud has an answer.

59:25 Caller Leif Gehr wrote this song. It was called Call Me When You Get A Little Older.

59:30 Adam That's right. I remember that. Call me. Yeah. I remember that one.

59:35 Caller Remember that guy who is a skateboarder?

59:37 Adam Right. I saw the behind the music. Crash a car, paralyze his hippie body. Got it. Got it. Got a little radio.

59:45 Drew Again, we just wonder why you would be this obsessed with somebody who is in a different place in life. Even if you were talking about another 18-year-old and saying, should I hang on for four more years, we'd say no.

59:56 Adam Right.

59:56 Drew Because it just doesn't work out.

59:58 Adam Well, look, here's the deal. Whenever an 18-year-old guy is talking about long-distance love with a 14-year-old, what he's really saying is, I cannot get late. I mean, right? I mean, if there were chicks in his vicinity that he was dating and screwing and having a good time with, he would not think for a second. This sounds like a good plan when you're a desperate man. This is the act of a desperate man. Brent?

1:00:23 Caller Yeah?

1:00:23 Adam You're going to have to find some townies to have sex with then if there's nobody in your college. But don't waste your time with this project.

1:00:31 Caller It's not really that. It's just that she's a really great friend.

1:00:34 Caller Okay.

1:00:37 Adam But Brent, you don't get any ladies your age, right?

1:00:40 Caller Yes, I do.

1:00:41 Adam You do?

1:00:43 Caller About last month.

1:00:45 Adam You do? Alright, what happened there?

1:00:47 Caller It was about a three month relationship.

1:00:50 Adam Alright, that's where you should keep your focus on folks your own age. They live in town.

1:00:56 Drew How many more friends do you need?

1:00:57 Adam Or move to Utah?

1:00:58 Drew You've got good friends, Your Honor.

1:00:59 Caller I'm in Colorado and I've only been here a week.

1:01:01 Drew Alright, you'll get some good friends.

1:01:03 Adam Make friends.

1:01:04 Drew You'll get some friends.

1:01:04 Adam Make friends and hang out there once in a while.

1:01:07 Drew Make sure they're over 14.

1:01:08 Adam Listen, I understand that project. No guy likes to kiss a girl off. You know what I mean? I mean, I understand that instinct in a bizarre way. Maybe I'm revealing too much about myself. But you know what I'm talking about?

1:01:25 Caller Looking at his watch, thinking it's too much potential.

1:01:28 Adam Yeah, I mean, when you're a guy who's not getting a ton of chicks and there's a chick that's into you, it's hard to blow her off. No matter how old she is or if she lives too far away or she's too young or whatever it is, it's hard just to start cutting them out when you don't have much to choose from in your own age range.

1:01:44 Drew Or you have nothing.

1:01:45 Adam Or nothing. And he's got to find something. Okay. Vicki?

1:01:50 Yeah.

1:01:50 Adam You're 45?

1:01:51 Caller Yeah.

1:01:52 Adam What's up?

1:01:53 Caller Hey, this question is for Dr. Drew.

1:01:55 Adam Yeah.

1:01:55 Caller I have been diagnosed with adenomyosis. And sex is really painful. And the guy that I had been with up until about June was huge. Now, is that why it hurts? I mean, because I love sex.

1:02:12 Adam His penis was huge?

1:02:13 Caller Yeah, really big.

1:02:14 Adam How big was it, you think?

1:02:16 Caller Probably nine inches and almost as big around as a Coke can.

1:02:19 Adam Oh, wow. Damn, bitch!

1:02:23 Caller I love sex, and I used to be a sex addict. I mean, I'm crazy about sex, and I want to have sex, but they want to give me a hysterectomy, and you know.

1:02:32 Drew Yeah, so I understand what you're asking. I know meiosis is, they're worried about you getting uterine cancer, right?

1:02:40 Caller That was not something they said to me. Is that some, what do you know about that?

1:02:44 Drew Well, if they're worrying about, if they're telling you to hysterectomy.

1:02:48 Adam They're worried about cancer?

1:02:49 Drew Might be.

1:02:50 Caller Just all these different problems I've had in the past, endometriosis is.

1:02:55 Drew Were you sexually abused when you were growing up?

1:02:57 Caller No, not at all.

1:02:58 Adam Are you crazy?

1:03:00 Caller Probably, because I love sex, and listening to you guys' show makes me think, you know, something was weird when I was little, because I have been a sex addict most of my life.

1:03:12 Drew Why don't you get treatment for that?

1:03:14 Caller I go to counselor all the time.

1:03:16 Drew Okay, all right.

1:03:16 Caller Monthly.

1:03:17 Drew All right, and so what's the question for us exactly? You've been told you have a diagnosis for this problem with the uterine lining, and you've got.

1:03:26 Adam Do you need a smaller penis?

1:03:27 Caller I guess, but that doesn't please me.

1:03:30 Adam Okay, I was going to set you up, but forget it. Forget it now, that attitude. You're off the list.

1:03:36 Caller I'm at the point where I'm asking guys what size you are, and then I find out I have this and it's painful, so can I have sex? I was wondering if Dr. Drew knew anything about adenomyosis.

1:03:47 Drew Not much. I've seen them take the hysterectomy, but I've seen people get hysterectomies over it.

1:03:53 Adam Would that be the cause source of the pain, you think?

1:03:55 Drew It could be. It could be the endometriosis, could be the endomyosis.

1:03:59 Adam What do you do for a living, Vickie?

1:04:00 Caller The endometriosis is gone. I'm a counselor, family counselor.

1:04:04 Adam Really?

1:04:04 Caller Yeah. I do lots of therapy and schooling for counseling and...

1:04:10 Adam You got any kids?

1:04:11 Caller I have a 20-year-old beautiful daughter. She's really together.

1:04:15 Caller She knows everything about sex.

1:04:18 Adam She get the horny gene?

1:04:20 Caller Yes.

1:04:21 Adam She out in LA.?

1:04:23 Caller Tucson.

1:04:23 Adam Oh, all right. Not worth it.

1:04:25 Caller We're going to be playing a show out there pretty soon.

1:04:27 Caller Oh, cool.

1:04:28 Adam They're going to be out there on the 13th of September.

1:04:31 Caller Excellent.

1:04:33 Adam Send your daughter out to the show.

1:04:34 Caller Yeah, she loves you guys.

1:04:36 Caller We got an array of sizes, too.

1:04:37 Adam Yeah. They'll find one that fits. So, yeah, they're really, they're like a socket set, the band. If the five-eighths is too big, you go down to the half-inch, you just keep moving. They're all different sizes.

1:04:50 Caller You ever see the seal show at Marine Land, you know, where the seal goes up and plays the horns? He, like, bounces his nose.

1:04:57 Adam All the different sizes, yeah.

1:04:59 Caller Yeah.

1:05:01 Drew But I'm curious why you're not proceeding with some treatment for this. You have pain, you have a diagnosis.

1:05:08 Caller Yeah, five different doctors have said to get a hysterectomy.

1:05:11 Drew Why aren't you doing that?

1:05:13 Caller Well, I looked on the internet and there's a Hearst Foundation that says 98% of the people that are supposed to get hysterectomies don't after they talk to them.

1:05:24 Adam Zip it, you nags!

1:05:26 Drew I would be listening.

1:05:27 Adam Five different doctors told to get a hysterectomy. She's looking for six opinion.

1:05:31 Drew They're pretty much doing... Hysterectomies are because there's a cancer risk. That's why we'd advise those typically.

1:05:37 Adam Is it just me or is Vicky sound almost insane? Is she kinda nutty? Is she a little cuckoo? And what is this? What is this curse that all women that are really into sex are sort of nuts? Can a sane chick just be really into sex? You know what I'm talking about? What is that? I don't know. There's plenty of sane guys who are really into sex. Every time we talk to a chick who says she's really into sex, she just sounds nuts. Like, um, like it's just sort of, um, just batty nuts. What is that? Why? Why, and why is she like that big penis? And it said on the screen it pointed a weird direction too. Did the guys, did it point a strange direction? The penis? No. No, it didn't. Okay. Says it pointed down. All right. You're good?

1:06:26 Caller I'm good.

1:06:26 Adam All right. Good times. Go get that hysterectomy.

1:06:29 Caller Really?

1:06:29 Adam Yeah.

1:06:30 Caller Okay.

1:06:30 Drew Unless, you know, unless cancer is something you really want to look forward to.

1:06:32 Adam What do they take out with that? The uterus?

1:06:34 Drew And the ovaries and the two lips.

1:06:35 Adam Yeah.

1:06:36 Drew So you can still have sex.

1:06:37 Adam And listen, I want you to send that to us, okay?

1:06:40 Caller The uterus?

1:06:40 Adam Yeah, because I don't trust you. I want proof. You understand?

1:06:45 Caller And then I'll come look you up, right?

1:06:46 Adam That's right.

1:06:47 Caller Because you're so big, right?

1:06:49 Caller Yeah.

1:06:50 Adam That's right. We'll keep the lights off. I'll go grab a softball. And we'll have a good time. All right. Let's talk to Tony. He's 15. Tony?

1:07:00 Caller Hey. Hey. Well, since like about 12 or 13, I found out about masturbating. And I've been doing it about every day ever since. And when I masturbated, I didn't really go down. Like the whole thing, I just like mostly stayed at the tip. And I've been doing it like ever since, like ever since I was 12. And like after puberty started, like I noticed that the head wasn't growing.

1:07:28 Drew But like you wore it down like a number two pencil.

1:07:32 Adam You eroded it. You wore it down like how an Indian makes a arrow.

1:07:38 Caller Kind of like that.

1:07:39 Adam Makes an arrowhead. It's just that.

1:07:40 Drew Well, that's chipping. That's chipping. This is this is.

1:07:43 Adam Oh, it's more like how how the Colorado caused the Grand Canyon. Just a constant constant running erosion.

1:07:50 Caller It kind of like that.

1:07:51 Adam Interesting. That could happen. Yeah.

1:07:54 Caller I'm wondering like what should I do about it? And I also notice like like the head on top of my body. It's like not as big as like it should be.

1:08:01 Adam Is that from thinking too much and scratching your head?

1:08:05 Drew I don't know why. Two in a row here.

1:08:07 Adam The head on top of your the one that's on your shoulders?

1:08:09 Caller Yeah, the one. It's like it's like not as big as it should be also.

1:08:12 Adam Yeah, it sounds small.

1:08:14 Caller Kind of like freaking me out.

1:08:15 Drew Do you have other obsessive thoughts?

1:08:17 Caller No.

1:08:18 Drew Do you have to go through rituals, hand washing, anything like that?

1:08:20 Caller No, no, no, no, nothing like that.

1:08:21 Drew No flick lights, which is not enough.

1:08:23 Adam Tony, did you ever did you ever think that maybe your body was just too big for your penis in your head? You know what I mean? Let's flip the math around.

1:08:30 Caller Well, it's like when it's erect, you can like kind of tell. Like, it'll have like, not like a scar, but like, you can tell from the part where it's like, because like the rest of the penis is like, it's like grown, except just like at the tip.

1:08:46 Adam This will happen. I, for instance, my asshole is constantly open from farting too much when I was young. It just never closed. It can happen. Things can stick. You know, one nostril is wider from picking. You know, I drive a stick, so my right hand is on the stick by my left finger. It goes up my left nostril. That one's enlarged. Hey, Tony.

1:09:12 Caller Yeah?

1:09:12 Adam Look, you don't really believe this, do you?

1:09:15 Caller What do you mean?

1:09:16 Drew What do you mean it's freaking you out? What are you feeling?

1:09:18 Caller I'm like, what should I do about it?

1:09:19 Drew Nothing. I mean, relax. That's what you should do. That's why I'm wondering, are you anxious about other things or having other kinds of obsessive thoughts or occupations?

1:09:26 Caller It freaks me out because what about one and a half sacks?

1:09:29 Drew You'll be fine.

1:09:30 Caller All right.

1:09:31 Adam It's better. Easier access.

1:09:33 Caller Get one of them suction devices. That might help.

1:09:36 Adam Yeah, and keep it on. That's what I do.

1:09:38 Caller Yeah, penis pump.

1:09:39 Adam Just leave the pump on. I just pull the hose apparatus off and all of a sudden I got two inches of width there. All right, Tony. All right. Do you smoke a lot of weed?

1:09:49 Caller No, I don't do any drugs.

1:09:50 Adam No drugs?

1:09:51 Caller No.

1:09:51 Adam Really? Anyone ever take it on any medication or anything?

1:09:57 Caller I have ADHD.

1:09:58 Adam All right.

1:09:58 Drew You want anything for that?

1:10:00 Caller I used to be.

1:10:02 Adam Maybe you should get back on that stuff.

1:10:04 Drew Sounds more OCD times 10.

1:10:05 Caller All right.

1:10:06 Adam Tony, don't do too much thinking. All right?

1:10:09 Caller All right.

1:10:10 Adam I want you to ignore most thoughts you have.

1:10:13 Caller All right.

1:10:14 Adam Okay?

1:10:15 Caller All right.

1:10:15 Adam I want you to focus on the basics of life like I'm on fire. I should roll around on the ground. You know, that's okay. You know, breathing, that kind of stuff. You know, certain things like when you're riding your bike and stuff. But all that sort of extraneous thought kind of stuff about the size of your penis and that kind of, your head and your head on your shoulders, don't think about that anymore, all right?

1:10:38 Drew All right.

1:10:39 Adam You watch TV, okay?

1:10:41 Caller I do plenty of that.

1:10:42 Adam Okay. I'd like to see more of that.

1:10:44 Drew Weird energy night.

1:10:45 Caller Yeah.

1:10:46 Adam Hope you bothered both here from the Long Beach Club All Stars. We're going to take ourselves a little break. We'll be right back.

1:11:23 Caller Yo, this is B-Real, Standup, and this is Bobo, from Cyprus Hills, and we're listening to The Love Loss, with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:11:34 Drew Those guys were particularly high that night, weren't they?

1:11:36 Adam No, they were always that high.

1:11:39 Drew No, I thought Bobo's eyes were like going to fall out of his head.

1:11:44 Adam Bobo was like so high that his lower eyelid was above his upper eyelid.

1:11:49 Drew Like a shark.

1:11:50 Caller So high.

1:11:52 Caller Yeah.

1:11:54 Adam It's like a lot of guys squint when they're high, but it takes a really good buzz to have your eye almost turn inside out. This is the lower part like when you're pounding what your lower lip does to your upper lip. Yeah. They're doing the Smokeout, which that's where you can find Long Beach Dub All-Stars on the 15th. Oh, no. What the hell is the Smokeout on the 13th of October? Right. That's in San Francisco. 15th, you can find them in Frisco. As well, we'll hear something off Wonders of the World, which is the name of the new CD, which is out on the 11th. But nope, you're both here from the band, by the way. Take a call and then we'll hear a song. Trista, you're 16?

1:12:37 Caller Yeah.

1:12:38 Adam What's up?

1:12:39 Caller Well, I actually have a question for the Long Reach double stars. Sublime and your guys' music is really immensely sentimental to me, and spiritual, and I was wondering the death of Bradley, how did that affect you guys? Did it make you want to keep living on and keep doing the music, or how did that affect you guys?

1:13:09 Adam What has it been, by the way, four and a half, five years?

1:13:13 Caller What?

1:13:13 Adam How long has it been?

1:13:14 Caller Has it been that long? Wow.

1:13:16 Adam Six years or not? Five.

1:13:19 Caller Five years.

1:13:19 Caller Yeah.

1:13:20 Caller Yeah, 95.

1:13:22 Adam Is it 95?

1:13:23 Caller Yeah.

1:13:25 Adam Six years?

1:13:26 Caller No, it was 96.

1:13:27 Adam Five years?

1:13:28 Caller It was 96.

1:13:28 Caller All right.

1:13:29 Caller Five years.

1:13:29 Adam Anyway, go ahead. Prisna?

1:13:34 Caller Yeah.

1:13:34 Drew What was that?

1:13:35 Adam Someone's going to answer your question, it's not going to be me.

1:13:39 Caller Well, yeah, we've got to keep moving on. You know, things happen and you just got to keep on moving on. No matter what it is, definitely tragedies affect people's lives. But if you just give up and quit, then you're just as dead as they are.

1:13:57 Adam Well, what initially was the plan? I mean, was there ever a plan just to this is it? No more music for us or?

1:14:06 Caller Yeah, it was heavy depression and grievance over a loved one. So it was like, you know, career stopped, life stopped.

1:14:17 Adam And what was that? Were you guys in the middle of a tour when he passed away? Or where were you at? You weren't in the studio, you were out on the road, right?

1:14:25 Caller We were on the road and finishing up our North American tour, getting ready to do an European tour shortly thereafter. Things were just starting to take off.

1:14:36 Adam I mean, did he pass away in New York?

1:14:39 Caller San Francisco.

1:14:40 Adam But in a hotel on the road, right?

1:14:43 Caller Yeah.

1:14:43 Adam So it's all of a sudden, it's like you're going from when we're going to be in Europe to everyone's going home basically, right?

1:14:49 Caller Yeah.

1:14:50 Adam How's his kid doing?

1:14:51 Caller He's doing good. He's getting big.

1:14:53 Adam Yeah, because he's, I guess, six now, right?

1:14:56 Caller All right.

1:14:57 Adam Hey, Trista, is that enough answer for you?

1:15:01 Caller Yeah, that's cool. I totally just like want to thank you guys for doing what you're doing. Like I said, it's really, really spiritual and it sets a melt for me and I'm totally like loving it. So thank you very much.

1:15:10 Caller Thank you. See you at the shows.

1:15:12 Caller Yeah, definitely.

1:15:13 Adam Take care of yourself, Trista.

1:15:14 Caller Thanks.

1:15:14 Adam All right. Let's hear something from Long Beach Dub All Stars.

1:15:18 Caller What did he have queued up there?

1:15:20 Caller Luke. He's got Luke.

1:15:21 Caller You want to hear Luke?

1:15:23 Adam You all right with that? Opie?

1:15:26 Caller I don't know, man.

1:15:27 Adam What do you want to hear?

1:15:28 Caller Oh, Luke's OK.

1:15:29 Adam You sure?

1:15:30 Caller Yeah.

1:15:31 Caller How about if we listen to Luke?

1:15:32 Adam Don't. Not if you're going to pout. I mean, you pick a song.

1:15:35 Caller What do you think about listening to Luke?

1:15:39 Drew All right.

1:15:40 Caller I'm going to pull my bottom eyelid over my top eyelid.

1:15:43 Caller Can we do that?

1:15:43 Caller Go ahead.

1:15:46 Adam All right. I'm going to pull my scrotum sack up over my belly button. All right. This is Luke. Another good one from Long Beach Dub All Stars off Wonders of the World, which is coming out on the 11th of September. So just about two weeks away, Kitties, go out there and get one. Let's take one more call before we got a break here. Sarah?

1:20:09 Caller Hi.

1:20:10 Adam Yeah. What's up?

1:20:12 Caller Well, okay.

1:20:12 Caller I have big boobs.

1:20:14 Adam Oh, thank God. Finally.

1:20:18 Caller And I'm sixteen and they kind of like dribble.

1:20:22 Adam They dribble?

1:20:23 Caller Yeah.

1:20:24 Adam Something just came out of my penis if it's any consolation. Yeah. So we're even now. How, how, what size are they? It's very important.

1:20:34 Caller Almost D. D?

1:20:35 Caller Bouncy, bouncy.

1:20:36 Caller Yeah.

1:20:37 Adam And how big is the rest of you?

1:20:40 Caller I'm kind of thin.

1:20:43 Adam Oh, this is my, this is really my killy seal that you know, when you know, you know, you know, it drives, you know, I met a girl once and I was just like talking to her over the phone and she was like, and she was real straight about it, but she goes, you know, I have trouble finding like formal wear because I'm really sort of slender at the bottom, but I'm big up top and it's hard to find a dress that's made for a woman that's, you know, very small or petite around the bottom, but very large up top and I was like, I was going insane. I love that kind of talk. Yeah. So you're, how tall are you?

1:21:16 Caller I'm like five, six.

1:21:17 Adam Five, six, a slender with the D's.

1:21:20 Caller Yeah.

1:21:20 Adam Oh, man. You got a boyfriend?

1:21:24 Caller Actually, no, I don't.

1:21:26 Adam Good. No one deserves you. Nobody. Do guys go nuts over you?

1:21:32 Caller Yeah.

1:21:32 Adam Yeah, they do?

1:21:33 Caller Yeah, they always stare at my tits.

1:21:35 Adam Yeah. But you know it. Now, do you not like that or does it feel like you have power over them?

1:21:40 Caller Well, it's like cool, but like if they're really ugly guys, then it's just like, ew, get away from me, you pervert.

1:21:46 Adam Yeah. That's great about chicks. Like, if the fat guy is checking them out, it's like, oh, you pig. Please, you're disgusting. When the good looking guy checks them out, it's like, oh, yeah, such a compliment. Oh, life is so cruel.

1:21:59 Drew All right.

1:21:59 Adam So what are they doing? They got stuff coming out of them?

1:22:01 Drew Are you on any medication, Sarah?

1:22:03 Caller No, I'm not.

1:22:04 Drew Is there any chance you're pregnant?

1:22:06 Caller No.

1:22:07 Drew And are they irritated a lot? The nipple's irritated?

1:22:11 Caller No, not really.

1:22:11 Drew Because sometimes just actually the rubbing of actually your bra, if you're athletic, that kind of thing can sometimes stimulate milk production or milk release.

1:22:18 Adam You've been on a trampoline lately?

1:22:22 Caller No, not really.

1:22:23 Adam We've got to get around one.

1:22:25 Drew And then probably what you have to do is talk to your doctor because there are certain endocrine and endocrinologic gland problems like thyroid problems, prolactin secreting tumors, these kinds of things that can cause that. It's probably nothing but it's worth getting it looked into. Have your periods been normal?

1:22:40 Caller Yeah, they have.

1:22:41 Adam Let's not talk about our periods. Come on, man. You're a virgin?

1:22:45 Caller Yes, I am.

1:22:46 Caller I keep my legs closed.

1:22:47 Adam Oh, really?

1:22:47 Caller Yeah.

1:22:50 Adam I'd like that... Could you wait for me?

1:22:53 Caller Yeah.

1:22:54 Adam Another, what are you, 16?

1:22:56 Caller Yeah.

1:22:57 Adam Say another... five hours? We're in La Cunha?

1:23:03 Caller Yeah.

1:23:04 Adam I could get there by 12, 35, 12, 40. I'm familiar with the area, you know. I used to live in La Crescenta. Oh, that's cool. Which is kind of... No, it isn't. La Crescenta is La Cunha's retarded cousin, basically. But don't worry, because Tahunga is really like the Mongoloid child of La Crescenta. Yeah, I could meet you down there at Rocky Colas?

1:23:29 Caller How about Memorial Park?

1:23:31 Adam Alright, better. Yeah, we'll meet at the park.

1:23:33 Drew Now, you understand what you need to do, sir. You need to go talk to your doctor, okay? You're not...

1:23:36 Caller Okay, cool.

1:23:37 Adam Alright, take care of yourself.

1:23:38 Caller Okay, thanks.

1:23:39 Adam Alright.

1:23:40 Caller Bye.

1:23:40 Adam Alright, good times. It's beautiful land out there. Beautiful Lakers Center.

1:23:46 Caller Alright. I thought you meant like her boobs were dribbling like they were bouncing or something.

1:23:51 Adam Yeah, would have been nice. What do you think was coming out of them?

1:23:55 Drew Milk.

1:23:56 Adam Really? Is anything that comes out of breast milk?

1:24:00 Drew That's usually what comes out of the nipples, yeah.

1:24:04 Adam How about I...

1:24:04 Caller Do you have to be pregnant?

1:24:05 Drew No, they're the low thyroid prolactin tumors. I kind of think I can do it.

1:24:09 Adam Drew, you tell me if this would be unprofessional. I meter at the park, I collect an oral sample from the breast and then spit it on like a Petri dish or something. You give it a look, see it tomorrow morning at the lab.

1:24:21 Caller You are found guilty as charged.

1:24:24 Adam Isn't that work? Isn't that just an extension of work? Are we here to help or not?

1:24:29 Drew You'd be helping, but I'm not sure.

1:24:31 Adam Alright, enough said. Long Beach Dub All Stars here. We'll take a little break. We'll be back. Hey, everyone, Loveline. I'm Adam.

1:25:12 Caller That's Drew.

1:25:13 Adam Bud's here from Long Beach Dub All Stars. Opie will be in here in just a matter of seconds. Wonders of the World is the name of the CD out the 11th. Here comes Opie now. Drew, shut the door behind him there. Would you please? Yes, sir. There you go. Well, I said please. Jeff?

1:25:33 Caller Yes.

1:25:34 Adam You're 20?

1:25:35 Caller Yes, I'm 20.

1:25:36 Adam What is up?

1:25:39 Caller It seems like a lot is up these days. I have this problem with an erection. This may sound like you, but it seems like it's up all the time no matter what I do.

1:25:54 Drew Is it literally up all the time or does it just keep coming up or popping up all the time?

1:25:59 Caller Every time I try and bring it down, it'll come up right away.

1:26:03 Drew It never goes down.

1:26:05 Adam Well, wait a minute, wait a minute. Hold on. Let me do some boner math here. If you're trying to bring it down, how can it come up because it's already up if you're trying to bring it down, right?

1:26:16 Caller Well, okay. So I'll have an erection and I'll have sex or masturbate.

1:26:23 Caller Right.

1:26:25 Caller Maybe five minutes later, it'll be up again. And it seems like today I had Spanish class, and I had to stand up in front of the class and with a pop tent and tell what clothes I was wearing. And unfortunately, I had the erection.

1:26:42 Drew You're gay.

1:26:43 Caller Is there any hot chicks in your class?

1:26:45 Caller There's millions, not a million, but there's lots of hot chicks.

1:26:49 Drew How old are you?

1:26:50 Caller I'm 20.

1:26:51 Drew Where are you going to school?

1:26:52 Caller I go to Maricopa College in Cardiff, California.

1:26:57 Adam Is it a real college?

1:26:58 Drew Cardiff by the Sea?

1:27:00 Caller It's one of the junior colleges for the people that aren't too smart.

1:27:04 Adam All right.

1:27:04 Drew I mean, this is sort of...

1:27:06 Adam What were you wearing? Were you wearing jeans or sweatpants?

1:27:09 Caller I just had some shorts on and I swear everybody was staring right down there. Sure.

1:27:14 Adam I'll tell you this new trend of these sort of outback, loose-fitting, khakis and all these kind of real baggy, puff-pin pants and everything.

1:27:22 Drew Bad plan.

1:27:23 Adam Not boner-friendly. Not at all.

1:27:25 Drew Friendly, but...

1:27:27 Adam No, I mean, but I mean it's like when I was in high school, I wore, you know, three or four pair of Levi's and six pair of underwear.

1:27:34 Caller I'll tell you what.

1:27:34 Adam I didn't take any chances.

1:27:36 Caller Go for the readjustment in front of the class and just be like, like, it doesn't bother you, chicks will dig it.

1:27:44 Caller See, I saw a couple of chicks staring at me and I didn't know if it was bad or good.

1:27:48 Caller Just reach down in there and pull it straight up so it's tucked behind your waistband by your belt line or whatever. Pull that thing straight up and then, you know.

1:27:57 Adam That will usually kill it sometimes.

1:27:59 Caller Be proud of it and chicks will dig you for it.

1:28:02 Adam All right, listen, he doesn't have a question, does he? Was that more, was that an announcement or a question? Look out world, I got a boner. I mean, isn't that what that was?

1:28:12 Drew Yeah. Well, also, he's old to be getting that, right? Isn't that for 15, 16 year old, whatever?

1:28:17 Adam You got to understand, guys who are in junior college are in a little bit of an arrested state of development.

1:28:22 Drew Yeah, you're right.

1:28:23 Adam So junior college guy being 20 is like a regular guy being like 17 and a half.

1:28:27 Drew Oh, I got you.

1:28:27 Caller What about that, Dr. Drew, what about that pre-epism stuff?

1:28:31 Drew Pre-epism, the pre-epism is usually a painful erection and it literally doesn't go down. That's why I was asking.

1:28:37 Caller For like months?

1:28:38 Drew Yeah, and then it doesn't go up anymore after that.

1:28:40 Adam Well, that's why you got to use it while it's out.

1:28:44 Caller Yeah?

1:28:45 Adam You're 19?

1:28:46 Caller Yeah, I sure am.

1:28:47 Adam What's up?

1:28:47 Caller Okay, well the other day I was going camping over the weekend and I got back Monday night and I was watching my TiVo and it asked me if I wanted to watch some adult movies. You know how that TiVo stuff works, you know, it knows what you like.

1:29:01 Adam I know.

1:29:02 Caller Yada, yada, yada.

1:29:03 Caller Poison Oak shows up Tuesday on my arms and legs. It's all in my package, you know, it's just actually, I don't know what to do here.

1:29:13 Drew You're in an airport or a bus station?

1:29:15 Caller No, I'm at work. They actually made me work tonight. Well, my question is, will over-the-counter medicines such as like Benadryl, Creme, be working? Would that be okay? Would that work for the area?

1:29:27 Drew Yeah, use Cort-Aid. Use Cort-Aid and maybe some Benadryl. But if it's really a bad outbreak, you're going to need something stronger.

1:29:34 Adam What, hold on, first off, what's the TiVo have to do with the Poison Oak?

1:29:40 Drew What he's saying is he got home from camping, sat down in front of the TV, and the TV said, hey, would you like to watch some porn? So, of course, he did. And that caused him to touch with his Poison Oak can.

1:29:51 Adam I got TiVo and I told you it taped a dark winged duck for me the other day. I didn't even know.

1:29:56 Drew You have been watching pay-per-view porn.

1:29:58 Adam Oh, I got to get more pay-per-view. I did tape some Playboy stuff. Hey, Dan?

1:30:04 Drew You got to push the green thumb up, though.

1:30:06 Adam Yeah, I can figure that out. Hey, Dan? Yeah? Where do you work?

1:30:12 Caller At Pizza Pipeline. It's in Eugene, Oregon.

1:30:14 Drew Pizza Pipeline.

1:30:15 Adam That sounds like a gay bar for Italian guys. It really does sound like a gay Italian bar, doesn't it?

1:30:24 Caller I don't know.

1:30:26 Caller So, what's the clinical name for that? Poison Stroke?

1:30:28 Caller What's that?

1:30:32 Drew Poison Wood instead of Poison Oatmeal.

1:30:33 Adam Oh, I'll tell you. All right, it's always fine, right? Get the cordade stuff.

1:30:38 Drew Well, I think he needs something stronger, but he needs Prednisone. But Jason?

1:30:42 Caller Yeah.

1:30:42 Adam The 18?

1:30:43 Caller Yeah.

1:30:44 Adam What's up?

1:30:46 Caller That's the much. I just got a question for the double stars.

1:30:48 Adam Here they are.

1:30:50 Caller All right. Which, what is the new music? What is the music video going to be coming out?

1:30:56 Caller What song is that for?

1:30:58 Caller Sunny Hours.

1:30:59 Caller Sunny Hours?

1:30:59 Caller Yeah.

1:31:00 Adam Are you done with the video?

1:31:01 Caller Yeah.

1:31:02 Adam So, it's ready to go?

1:31:02 Caller It's ready to go.

1:31:03 Adam When?

1:31:04 Caller Want to check it out right now?

1:31:05 Caller Yeah. Fletcher is bringing it down to MTV with a couple of hand grenades so they should be playing it pretty soon.

1:31:10 Adam Does he really need hand grenades? Isn't he just sort of a hand grenade? All he's got to do is eat himself like a couple of... What did he eat before he came over here and heaved it into that big cup of yours?

1:31:25 Drew Oh, yeah.

1:31:26 Adam Now, he heaved pizza on you, but then when he was trying to make it up to you...

1:31:31 Drew Sandwiches. He had some kind of sandwich.

1:31:32 Adam No, I thought he ate like a...

1:31:34 Caller Papa Jigs?

1:31:35 Adam He ate like a tub of a raspberry swirl ice cream or something, then vomited into a cup and then put some surfboard resin over that. Oh, Jesus Christ. Why did you bring him up? But now I'm not going to be able to sleep tonight.

1:31:48 Caller He's my bro.

1:31:51 Adam Hi. Hey, Jason?

1:31:52 Caller Yeah.

1:31:53 Adam So, so there's the video.

1:31:55 Caller The video should be coming out, I don't know, sometime soon within the drop of the album. Where's the?

1:32:01 Adam Are you guys going to have it?

1:32:02 Caller Does anybody know when the video is coming out? Anybody?

1:32:05 Adam No, they stopped listening. Your management left a long time ago. Yeah, what about the website? Are you going to be able to see something on there?

1:32:13 Caller You might be able to see a snippet or something. We might hook it up. I don't know.

1:32:17 Caller That would be great.

1:32:18 Adam Any day, I heard.

1:32:20 Caller I'm going to see you guys at the end of the invasion on Saturday.

1:32:23 Caller I know.

1:32:24 Adam Good times there, Jason.

1:32:25 Caller Yeah.

1:32:26 Adam Take care of yourself. All right. They'll see you at the invasion and we'll be back. Well, there you go. Another fabulous episode of Loveline. Dead and in the ground. Wonders of the World, name of the CD. That is out on the 11th. So all you Long Beach Dub All-Star fans go out and get that. And even if you're not, go out and get it. I want to thank Opie and Bud for coming in here tonight and being great as usual. Thanks, guys.

1:33:25 Drew Thank you.

1:33:25 Adam We'll see you again soon, yeah?

1:33:28 Caller Are we getting kicked out of here?

1:33:29 Drew Well, it's all over.

1:33:30 Adam We're all out of here. Don't take it personally. We're going home, too.

1:33:34 Drew Well, you guys can stay.

1:33:35 Adam Yeah, hang out. Likus will be on about 17 hours. You can hang out with him.

1:33:39 Caller Okay, we just want you guys to know that you were listening to Dubb Line with Opie, Carolla.

1:33:44 Caller And Dr. Bud.

1:33:46 Caller Yeah.

1:33:47 Caller And right here we have the Loveline All-Stars. Thank you very much for coming.

1:33:51 Adam And until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:33:54 Drew My lover likes me a lot, but sometimes I'm scared because he is very active. He gives me oral sex. I just give him the hand.

1:34:02 This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Wednesday, August 22, 2001