Episode 1000754886932

0:54 Voiceover It's McBurnet, Nolte Audience. Listener discretion is advised.

1:08 Voiceover Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Hey, hey, hey, y'all, it's Loveline.

1:17 Adam Let's just start off with a nice fart. I've been going, I've been blowing gas all weekend.

1:27 No telepaths, Clown.

1:29 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

1:31 Adam Drew, that hit, that hit you like, like Rocky Graziano throwing a stiff right, wasn't it? Man, that was tough, huh?

1:46 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, it's Loveline.

1:54 Adam I'm Adam Corolla, that's Dr. Drew over there with his shirt pulled up over his head like he's robbing a bank, everybody.

2:01 Drew That was with the speed of sound too.

2:03 Adam Yeah.

2:03 Drew That thing made its way across the room.

2:04 Adam Instant gratification.

2:06 Drew Oh, and you just kind of coily let that go too. You knew, you knew what was coming.

2:11 Adam Dr. Drew, board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist.

2:15 Drew I wonder why you're in such a spry spirits tonight. Now I know. You've had a night of it.

2:20 Adam I've been letting them fly all weekend, Drew.

2:23 Drew Well, buddy, this is what it takes to make you happy. I'm willing to suffer the consequences.

2:27 Adam Yeah. And I, you know, the thing what I did is I let that one go and then I gave a quick flap of the notepad and just hit it like a tennis ball.

2:35 Drew Right in my face.

2:36 Adam It was pow.

2:37 Drew Yeah.

2:38 Adam Punching.

2:39 Drew I swear I saw it coming at me. Like some kind of.

2:41 Adam Yeah. You should have ducked. All right, Drew, come on. No, no. It's not embarrassing me with this shirt.

2:46 Drew Embarrassing or impressing.

2:48 Adam Corolla, come on.

2:49 Drew Yeah. We're adults.

2:50 Adam No, it's gone now.

2:51 It burnt bright, but it burned quick.

2:53 Drew Yes. Give me the. Oh, we got to have matches.

2:55 Adam No.

2:55 Drew Tara, seriously. All right. I need a pack of matches.

2:58 Adam If I can get something else.

2:59 Drew Tara, please.

3:00 Adam Drew, what has happened?

3:01 Drew No, just hand me the matches. That's all. Throw them in. Don't come in the room. Just toss them in.

3:04 Adam Drew, let me ask you a question.

3:06 Drew Yeah.

3:07 Adam How does the human body work in that? I spent the better part of my life not producing any kind of stink at all. And just over the last few years or so. No, don't spray the Lysol, you idiot. It gets in my coffee.

3:21 Drew Give me the matches, please. Oh, my God. You go out to go down to the liquor store and get anything.

3:28 Adam All right. Oh, Drew, it's all gone now, please. Drew, how does the body change that way?

3:36 Drew You just as you age and your body decays, those bacteria love to overpopulate and produce more methane.

3:42 Adam I'm saying my gut is rotting from the inside out.

3:45 Drew It really smells like it.

3:51 Adam Oh, yeah. Man shows on tonight, by the way.

3:53 Yeah.

3:54 Adam Turn that on, Davey. And you got the man show on. Yeah, that's a classic.

3:58 Oh, whatever.

3:59 Adam Sock puppet porn on tonight. Oh, yeah.

4:03 Drew This is not quit.

4:04 Adam Yeah. Let's start. Yeah. So Chuck.

4:07 Drew Yeah.

4:08 Adam Yeah. Yeah. You're in Florida. You're very lucky. My fart should if it hits the Gulf Stream just right, it should be heading over there. It's just a matter of hours. Yeah. Yeah.

4:18 So far, we're lucky.

4:19 Adam All right. So what's up?

4:20 OK. My wife's a waitress and she works in a real nice restaurant. And it seems like everybody there is either gay or bi.

4:28 Adam Yeah. And everyone who works there, everyone who goes there, everyone that works there. Right. Gays love the restaurants.

4:35 Yeah.

4:35 Adam It's a good industry for them.

4:37 Seems like it. I never knew that till my wife started working there. And I knew that before we married, we've been married six years. And I knew before we married, she had messed around a little with women, but I didn't think too much of it. In fact, I thought it was kind of a turn on. But we've been married six years and our sex, to be honest with you, isn't quite as exciting as it used to be. How come? Well, I don't know. It's just, you know, you kind of get in a routine and. And she works and I work and her hours or she works a lot at night.

5:07 Drew What's your routine?

5:08 Pardon?

5:09 Drew What's the routine?

5:10 Adam Well, hold on a second. The proverbial routine.

5:13 Drew I'm just curious what the routine is.

5:15 Adam The bloom is off the rose. They've been married for a while.

5:18 Drew Yeah, I think you'd be curious to know.

5:20 Once a week, usually Friday or Saturday, depending on which ever night she can get off. No puns intended.

5:27 Adam Alright, so the question is?

5:29 Okay, the question is, about a month ago, I know most of her friends and we, you know, hang out some together. And I don't have any problem with gays. You know, that's okay.

5:43 Adam By the way, Chuck, it's the gays.

5:45 Drew Faggot better run through.

5:46 Adam No, it's not faggot. It's the gays. Go ahead.

5:50 Got it. Anyway, about a month ago, she started, we would, we'd be making love and she would start kind of fantasizing and, and talking about how would I feel about, you know, another woman.

6:01 Drew In the middle of your session together?

6:04 Yeah.

6:05 Adam Right.

6:05 Which I thought was, you know, pretty normal. Cause you know, you, you kind of bring in your fantasies and kind of getting into that. And I thought, well, that's, that kind of adds a little spice. It was kind of exciting.

6:15 Drew Faggot.

6:18 The thing that worries me is now she's, one thing is I don't want to get into something where it's, you know, I wouldn't mind a threesome once in a while, but I don't want it to become a regular part of our.

6:29 Adam No. But do you guys have any kids?

6:32 No kids.

6:33 Adam All right.

6:33 Don't plan to for probably another five or six years.

6:36 Adam Okay. And you've been married for how long?

6:38 Drew Six years.

6:39 For six years.

6:39 Adam And you've been married for six years.

6:41 Drew This is the problem. You didn't go out and you didn't experience yourself really as an adult.

6:46 Adam You didn't miss anything.

6:47 Drew But she didn't experience anything.

6:49 Adam Okay. But here's the deal. Check.

6:51 Caller Well, wait, there's something else. So about a month or actually about six weeks ago, she started talking about bringing a friend of hers home that I know. And she's really, you know, that would be kind of cool, I think. But now about two weeks ago, she started talking about bringing this girl she works with and a guy.

7:12 Adam And a couple of his buddies?

7:13 Caller No, no, two of them. And I don't know whether that's just a fantasy. But I don't know, I'm kind of...

7:20 Adam Hey, Chuck?

7:20 Drew Yeah, you're going down a slippery slope here.

7:22 Adam Yeah. You're going to have a double-ended black novelty size dildo in your ass in just a matter of moments.

7:30 Caller That's what I'm afraid of.

7:32 Adam You keep going down this angle here. Okay. So listen, Chuck, this chick's a little chaotic. I don't know if I completely trust her and it is a very slippery slope.

7:43 Drew Yeah.

7:44 Adam And it will destabilize things.

7:46 Drew It's not a positive direction for your relationship to go. If there's a problem in the physical intimacy, maybe you should have that evaluated. It's a sign that something's not going right in the relationship, whether it's her or you or whatever, or maybe the fact that you got married. Whatever it is, it needs an evaluation. Try to spice it up, so to speak, is sort of putting a death knell on the relationship. It's not going to work. And I wish to the human, threesomes and foursomes were healthy, good things. We'd be advocating them, but they're unhealthy, destabilizing, ruin relationships. If you're 19 and college, you're experimenting, it's one thing, but you're married, it's going to cause the marriage to fall apart.

8:23 Adam Let me float this notion, and then I'm going to float another biscuit. Drew, seriously.

8:29 Drew Seriously, I'm going to run out the back door.

8:30 Adam Will you vomit if you catch one?

8:32 Drew I came close that lifetime.

8:34 Adam If you catch one in the right phase, you may... Oh, Drew, Drew, let one go. What about your Hippocratic oath, Drew? How dare you? What about the patient physician privilege, the confidentiality?

8:53 Drew This is war, isn't it?

8:55 Adam I guess so. OK, that's disgusting. Listen to what I'm saying here, Drew. OK, listen to what I'm saying. Wouldn't you agree that the people who are allowed to have threesomes are the people who don't think to have threesomes? I wouldn't care. See, this chick is chaotic. This chick is acting out and this chick is hell bent on throwing a wrench into the gears of this relationship. If I knock on your door one day and say, hey, you guys are having a threesome, here's my whole friend Tammy, she's bisexual, the relationship will be fine. So it's almost screwed by virtue of the fact that one of you wants to have one. Sarah?

9:37 Caller Yeah.

9:37 Adam You're 24, what's up?

9:40 Caller Well, for the past four days, I've started having some symptoms and I was just, I guess my question was, what are some basic symptoms of herpes?

9:50 Drew Well, it's variable, but the classic progression is sort of a flu-like syndrome, followed by swelling of the lymph nodes down in the groin area, followed by burning and itching in the vaginal area, often you can see ulcers there that hurt a lot when you touch them.

10:06 Caller Right. All right. Well, I have all those symptoms, so I guess my other question was that, could I have had this for a while and this is the first?

10:15 Drew A reactivation. It could be a reactivation. You could have many people, women particularly, missed the first few episodes or missed them all together. Don't know they have it.

10:24 Adam Don't you have a big reaction?

10:25 Drew I mean, the first one is usually a lot more intense, though sometimes people, when they're sort of re-exposed or something causes irritation, causes it to break out again, it's more obvious for whatever reason. Okay. Because it can be more internal for women. Sometimes there's a lot of cramping and that kind of thing.

10:40 Adam Hey, Sarah.

10:41 Caller Yeah.

10:41 Adam Why, you don't think you could have got them from somebody recently?

10:45 Caller Well, I think I did get it from someone recently, but I'm just having trouble trying to communicate that fact with them. So, I mean, I've been tested before. If it was something that was like a non-showing signs of symptoms, I mean, is it possible to not show signs if you have it?

11:04 Drew Yes. But again, it doesn't have to come from the genitalia, it comes from the mouth, too. And sometimes people will say, geez, I've never had it. Then you go, well, have you ever had a cold sore? Yeah. OK. Well, most people had that. If he'd had one of those outbreaks at the time, there you go.

11:18 Adam Could have been inside his mouth, too, right?

11:19 Caller Is that true?

11:21 Adam Good times. So what should you do? Go to the doctor?

11:24 Drew Yeah, there are medications to shorten the intensity of duration of that outbreak.

11:27 Adam Sarah, I mean, Richard, you're 20.

11:30 Caller Yep.

11:31 Adam What's up?

11:32 Well, I've got a 15-year-old girlfriend.

11:34 Caller Good times.

11:35 Drew You're 20.

11:36 Caller What's that?

11:37 Caller Yeah. Unacceptable.

11:38 Adam All right.

11:39 What's that?

11:39 Caller Yeah, yeah, yeah.

11:40 Yeah, I'm 20. We're having spectacular time. She's a very awesome girl and I wouldn't be going out with her if I couldn't talk to her.

11:49 Adam Right.

11:50 But we're having a problem with telling her parents because this is, again, a 20.

11:55 Adam Right.

11:55 Drew Are you sleeping together?

11:57 No. Oh, definitely not. I'm the symbolism of the friendless version. And I'm, no, I'm.

12:03 Drew Say that again slowly.

12:04 Adam He's a symbol of, yeah.

12:06 I'm, no, I'm a version and I plan to stay that way for a while.

12:10 Adam All right.

12:11 Drew You have to like codify that with the parents.

12:13 Adam Yeah.

12:13 Drew Bring your virginity papers. What do they give virgins? They give them some sort of seal or?

12:17 Adam There's a stamp. The Pope stamps their penis.

12:21 Drew People want to see that.

12:22 Adam That's so they can get back into the Vatican. When you leave the Vatican, they tell you, you know, you want to come back?

12:29 Drew Don't they just put a little barcode on it and scan it?

12:31 Adam I like that stamp thing. You ever do that? You're at a swap meet and you're leaving? There was a little indignant about it. Are you coming? Are you planning on coming? You're coming back? Like, yeah. Oh, well, if you're going to come back, it's like, yeah, all right, Pops, just give me the goddamn stamp and let me go out and drink a sixer in the parking lot. I'll be back.

12:50 Like I said, I'm giving the governor's approval to the Man Show.

12:53 Adam Thank you.

12:54 Drew What happened?

12:55 Adam I don't know.

12:56 Drew Something happens now.

12:57 Adam I don't know why.

12:57 Drew Stamp approval.

12:58 Caller I thought it said stamp approval.

13:00 Adam Ah, the stamp approval. Thank you. So, Richard, yeah, does well, you know, what are you doing with her? I'm talking and basically just, you know, sharing the good news about Jesus Christ.

13:15 No, we're just having a good time discussing a lot of things and having an awesome time with her.

13:23 Drew Then go meet the parents, the sooner the better then.

13:25 Adam Yeah, but how do you?

13:26 I'm having a problem here because I was friends with her brother. I mean, really good friends.

13:30 Adam Who?

13:31 Drew Yeah, that's a good thing because then he knows what you're all about. He knows.

13:35 He's backstabbing me.

13:36 Drew What's he saying?

13:37 His parents, he's basically spreading rumors that I'm cheating on her and that I've been sleeping around.

13:42 Drew Well, you've got to get in there and defend yourself. You've got to get a relationship with the parents for us.

13:46 Okay. Well, that was a thing because while her mother got pregnant at 17.

13:52 Drew Well, that's undoubtedly what this girl is looking for, by the way. Just by the way, if you don't provide that, maybe you could expect her to act it out.

14:01 Adam Well, maybe he could petition the courts and win custody of her.

14:04 Actually, she stopped me from going too far.

14:07 Adam She stopped you?

14:08 Yep, she stopped me.

14:09 Drew I thought you were a committed virgin and would never think of doing something like that.

14:13 Adam No, I didn't say anything about Aynor.

14:15 I'm a committed virgin, but I would never do anything against her will.

14:21 Drew Yeah, those are two different things.

14:23 Adam Yeah, right. All right. So after she has a couple of wine coolers, then it's cool because her will has been plied. I don't know. Listen, we're giving a 20-year-old guy advice on how to, we're giving a guy who should be going into his third year of college, advice on how to date a ninth or tenth grader. Do you know what I mean? He sounds fairly harmless, but on the other hand, he's kind of an idiot. And God knows what's up with her. And mom was pregnant at 17. It's just how far do you want to stick your neck out for this guy?

15:01 Drew Do you know what I'm saying?

15:02 Adam And then he kind of lets go that she stopped him from going further. Yeah, I don't know. I think he should. I really don't. I just I don't think a 20 year old guy should be dating a 15 year old.

15:14 Drew I agree with that.

15:15 Adam And I don't know. And not your buddy's sister either. I mean, think about this, Drew. You're 20. You got a 15 year old kid sister when your buddy's hopping on her. When you have 20 year old buddies. You're going to freak out. Yeah. What are you going to do? Just lay rose petals, a trail of rose petals to your house and have trumpeters blow. As this guy enters your home. No, you probably talk a little smack about it. You might even take a swing at him. That's a little dicey.

15:47 Drew I agree.

15:47 Adam And you know, this guy's thing is like.

15:49 Drew Sounds good on paper. You know what I mean? The guy's harmless.

15:52 Adam Yeah, he sounds harmless.

15:53 Drew But he is. You're right.

15:55 Adam Yeah. And he's like his buddy's backstabbing him. The way he puts it. No, you backstab your buddy.

16:00 Drew By dating a sister.

16:01 Adam His kid sister. Okay. So you get no help from us.

16:05 Stamp of approval.

16:06 Adam Stamp of approval.

16:07 Drew There it is.

16:10 Adam Donald.

16:11 Yes.

16:11 Adam You're 13. What's up?

16:14 Caller My dad has walked out on us before, but he hasn't stayed away as long as he has recently. And last time he did, it was because he apparently spent more money than we had in a bank account on drugs. And I found them in his bathroom long before he left.

16:37 Adam The drugs.

16:38 Caller Yes.

16:39 Adam What drugs?

16:40 Caller Marijuana.

16:41 Drew How does he spend everything on marijuana?

16:45 Adam It's $50 for an eighth or a quarter.

16:49 Drew What else is he doing? He must be doing something else.

16:52 Caller Well, I don't know about anything else, but I know that he had a, you know, this little sandwich bag?

16:58 Adam Hold on a second. Yep.

17:00 Caller Well, he had one of them full.

17:03 Adam All right.

17:04 Drew $950.

17:06 Adam No, I mean, if he had one of those full, it was full of buds or something, it could be $150 for the weed, but emptying the bank account. Okay.

17:15 Caller All I know is that he spent a lot of money on it.

17:18 Drew Not on pot.

17:20 Caller Well, I don't know what it was.

17:21 Adam Well, and it's all relative too, which is if you're not, you know, you're going to get the phone shut off this month and you spend your last $185 on weed, that's a lot of money. But all right, Donald, your dad's an idiot, right?

17:35 Drew Right.

17:36 Caller Okay.

17:36 Drew So what's the question?

17:39 Caller He's left again, but this time I have no idea why.

17:42 Adam Well, he's probably going out on some drugs.

17:45 Caller Yeah.

17:45 Drew It sounds that's kind of a cocaine addict's behavior.

17:49 Adam Yeah.

17:50 Drew So he may be doing a lot of crack or something.

17:52 Caller Well, my grandfather is visiting my uncle right now in New York.

17:57 Drew Yeah.

17:58 Caller And my father is staying at my grandfather's house.

18:02 Drew Right.

18:03 Caller So I know where he is.

18:05 Drew What's the question, Donald?

18:07 Caller Well, I'm thinking about running away.

18:09 Drew Why?

18:10 Caller Because all the time he's always hassling me. And when he leaves, I'm expected to do everything that he should have besides get a job. Take care of my little sister. She's only 11. She has no idea what's going on. My mom, who keeps trying to hide it, she doesn't want us to know what's really going on.

18:32 Drew Why don't you get your mom to shape up a little bit?

18:36 Adam And listen, you don't have to take on his responsibilities.

18:40 Drew Right.

18:41 Adam I mean, look, here's your job, Donald. I had an interesting conversation with my grandmother yesterday when she read me this letter that she wrote to like some court system or something.

18:53 Drew On your behalf?

18:53 Adam Yeah. It's a long story.

18:55 Drew On your behalf?

18:56 Adam Yeah. Yeah. When I was like 10.

18:59 Drew What?

19:00 Adam It's a long story, but I'll tell you, it's too long a story for the end. It doesn't have a big payday. But the point is, is she documented my family and basically what was going on in my family. My dad was a total loser. I mean, you know, he was always in between jobs. He was moving back and forth from the East Coast to the West Coast. He never had a pot to then. He wasn't a drug addict. He wasn't abusive, but that would have been it.

19:24 Drew If he'd been using drugs, that's what would have put it into that abusive range.

19:28 Adam Well, my family were like drug addicts minus the drugs.

19:30 Drew Right. That's right.

19:31 Adam They didn't have the money. They were just as disheveled. They were just as unemployable. They just actually didn't get high. That would have been an improvement. They would have got the high. They had all the lows with none of the highs.

19:42 Drew Do you think he was psychiatrically disabled?

19:44 Adam They were just very depressed and unable to function and just losers. Couldn't one step forward, two step back kind of thing. Lots of plans that didn't work out, that kind of stuff. But I was just thinking, it was reminding me of Donald's dad over here. Here's what you got to do as a kid. This is what I did. You just write them off. You focus on school, not the studying part, but the hanging out part.

20:08 Drew For Donald, it would be good to focus on the school.

20:11 Adam You hang out with your friends who probably have some loser parents too. If they don't, you go to their house and eat, hang out, use their stuff.

20:18 Drew You stay the hell away from your family.

20:19 Adam You get into sports.

20:21 Drew You get support other places and you have ways to find ways of nourishing yourself. Literally, as you did, find ways to eat.

20:28 Adam You go eat at other people's houses.

20:29 Drew And nourish yourself emotionally with staying around other people's stable families.

20:33 Adam You have a thousand interests. None of them have to do with anything under the roof of your particular home. You're at football practice every day. When that season ends, you're at baseball practice every day.

20:43 Drew If these are sort of legitimate team-type sports and stuff, they can't really argue. And you've got the support of the team and the coaches. They start giving you trouble.

20:53 Adam And on the weekends, you spend the night at your friends. And that's it. You basically get adopted. You just get out of the house. And now once in a while, you get a horrible high dad who comes out to the soccer practice and starts beating you or something. But normally, they want to be left alone to do their drugs or to lock themselves in a room or do their booze. You know what I mean? They have an agenda. It's not going out of their way to find you usually.

21:18 Drew But for Donald, if he can't sort of get these things together, talk to people at school, call the Child Protective Services, I'm going to give you a phone number that you can call. It's 1-800-422-4453. 1-800-422-4453.

21:38 Caller Okay, 1-800-422-4453. Okay.

21:41 Drew All right.

21:42 Adam All right.

21:43 Caller Okay.

21:44 Adam I'm sorry your dad's an idiot.

21:45 Drew Get a follow up number on him. Let's call him that way.

21:48 Adam I'm sorry your dad's a jackass, but don't put any stock in him. He's an idiot. I'm sorry he broke your heart and disappointed you. But you know what?

21:58 Drew Don't let that destroy you.

21:59 Adam Yeah. Don't stay with him. Just ride him off and keep moving. Hey, if he sobers up, if he comes back, that's great. But if he doesn't, you're moving forward. You understand?

22:09 Drew Yes, sir. Not running away.

22:11 Adam Well, I mean, what you don't want to do is drop out of school, start doing drugs yourself, end up like a younger version of him, essentially. Yeah. Take a break.

22:22 Drew I want to hear the story.

22:22 Adam Girlfriend committed suicide. Committed suicide?

22:26 Drew That's what it says.

22:27 Adam Should he get back together with his ex-girlfriend now? Oh, the current one went?

22:32 Drew Yeah.

22:32 Adam Let me just say hi to him. Ken?

22:34 Yeah.

22:35 Adam So your current girlfriend committed suicide and you want to know if you should get back together with your ex?

22:40 Caller Yeah, well, my ex and me have been talking about it. I just don't know how good that would be to her.

22:45 Adam How long ago did the girlfriend commit suicide?

22:49 Caller June 3rd.

22:51 Adam All right. Hold on a second there, Ken. Take a break. We'll get to the bottom of that one after this.

23:02 Caller Love Line on 947NRK is brought to you by Car Toys and by The Cobalt Lounge. Love Line with Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla on 947NRK.

23:33 Adam Hey, it's Dr. Drew, everybody.

23:35 Caller No, no, no. Lose it.

23:57 Wow.

23:58 Caller Wow.

24:03 Adam Oh, I just let a serious bomb go. Wow, Drew.

24:08 Whoa.

24:10 Caller Oh, salvation.

24:12 Adam Drew found a fan back there. Oh, it's not plugged in. Oh, man, that had some punch to it, huh, Drew? The shirt, the shirt's a little helpless. You want to guess what I ate for dinner? Yeah. Curry. Hey, it's Loveline, everybody. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew over there. He's got the he's got a shirt pulled up over his face. It might not be able to understand him too well. A big blast go in here. Second one.

24:47 Always try to remember what to do if the atom bomb explodes right then. It's a bomb. Dump and cover it.

24:53 Adam Drew, turn the fan on there. All right, Drew, come on, seriously, let's focus now. We got calls to think.

24:58 Caller Oh, geez.

24:59 Adam Drew, you're blowing everything all over the place here.

25:03 Drew No, that was you that did that.

25:05 Adam Drew, that had some pop, right? I mean, as a physician, wouldn't you say that had some pop?

25:11 Drew No, that was, yeah. Pop does not begin to describe what that had.

25:14 Adam You know what I did that time, everybody?

25:16 Drew Backhand.

25:17 Adam I did a backhand. Normally, I go forehand. I go overhand with my flip when I wave my notepad at Drew. But this was kind of a scoop, kind of an underhand.

25:28 Drew It needed no propellant.

25:29 Adam It just filled the room. Yeah, but the actual swirl combustion I gave it was...

25:35 Drew It was like a study in entropy and you know how...

25:38 Adam That was solid.

25:39 Drew It was made across space.

25:40 Adam Very solid.

25:41 Drew That fan cannot happen.

25:42 Adam It smells good.

25:43 Drew Yeah, if the fan doesn't happen, I don't happen.

25:45 Adam Just a little bit of fan in the room. That's not working. I'll tell you, if I let another one go to Drew and it swirls with that fan, it's going to be instantaneous death in this room.

25:56 Drew Oh, my God. It's just incredible.

25:57 Adam Ken?

25:58 Caller Yeah.

25:59 Adam Is it better? Your girlfriend committed suicide?

26:01 Drew Oh, my God.

26:02 Caller My girlfriend, Beth, she killed herself on June 3rd of this year.

26:07 Adam Almost killed Drew over here. How did she kill herself?

26:11 Caller She hung herself.

26:12 Drew Oh, my God.

26:13 Adam What room?

26:14 Caller I'm not sure. See, what had happened was I had gone to prison here in Illinois in 2000. In March of 2000, I had a heroin problem. And I got out in March of 2001. And when I got out, she was still getting high and stuff. And she had caught a bunch of cases while I was in jail.

26:32 Drew What does that mean?

26:33 Caller Well, like a bunch of criminal cases.

26:35 Drew For what?

26:36 Caller For just whatever she was doing to get her drugs while I was in jail. See, I used to take all the blame for everything when I was out.

26:42 Drew Was she turning tricks or something?

26:45 Caller No, no, no, just like stealing and, you know, she robbed her sister's house and just stupid stuff, you know.

26:51 Drew She was a heroin addict too.

26:52 Caller Yeah. Now, when I got out of prison, now I had been cleaned for a year being in prison and all, and I wasn't going back to this stuff. So I started going to meetings.

27:00 Drew Right.

27:01 Caller And yeah, everything was good. And so what I did was me and her got a condo together in order for I still wanted to be with her, but I also couldn't be around her if she was getting high. I talked her into getting on methadone. She was on methadone and she wasn't getting high because I was around her all the time.

27:18 Drew So I knew, you know, Methadone is a mess too though.

27:22 Caller Yeah, I know. But at least it was a start.

27:25 Adam Hold on, Drew, did you fart or is that my fart? Really? It's still my fart that's coming back this way?

27:31 Drew I cursed these walls. We got these linen padded walls.

27:34 Adam Yeah.

27:35 Drew It's gonna be like this for a week in here.

27:37 Adam Yeah, it's a disaster in here, Ken. I know you've seen some hard times, but not, you know, between prison and the suicide and everything, but not as hard as Drew's seen tonight.

27:45 Drew This is bad.

27:45 This is bad.

27:47 Adam All right. Bad times. She hung herself and you didn't... Who found her?

27:52 Caller Well, that's it. See, she got sentenced to prison while I was in there, but it was only to boot camp. And that was just, you know, boot camp is just a bunch of exercise and four months and then you're home. So she left on May 29th and we had a condo together and she was supposed to be home September 30th. And she killed herself three days in there.

28:12 Drew While she was there.

28:13 Caller Yeah. So it was June 3rd. She left on the 30th of May and she was...

28:17 Adam Yeah. So she was just withdrawing, right? I mean, didn't they give her methadone in there?

28:23 Caller Well, not in the county jail, but she was only in the county jail for two days. So I'm sure she was withdrawn then, but she had gone through withdrawals. She had been in jail before, and she had been in jail a hell of a lot longer. And I know that, you know, methadone is a hell of a lot different than heroin.

28:39 Drew Yeah, it doesn't even start for three or four days, really.

28:41 Caller Yeah, in the beginning it is, you know?

28:43 Adam I mean, if you're on methadone for a year. What doesn't start?

28:45 Drew Methadone and the withdrawal. Sometimes people will get it in the first day or two, but usually the real heat of the withdrawal doesn't start for three to five days out.

28:51 Adam All right, well anyway, listen, Ken, you and your girlfriend have led a very sad life up until this point.

28:57 Drew And Ken, you also know that this addiction is a deadly disease. She died of her disease.

29:02 Caller Yeah, I know.

29:02 Drew That's unfortunate.

29:03 Caller I know why she did it. But see now, the reason I'm calling is because the girl that I broke up with to start dating Beth, now she had also been into heroin when we were dating and she had gotten cleaned up over the years. Now we broke up in 97 and we had gotten back together a little while in 99 while me and Beth were on a break. And anyway, she was at the wake and I hadn't seen her, you know, for a year and a half obviously. And you know, we started talking and stuff and we exchanged phone numbers and we started going to meetings together. You know, and things were...

29:33 Drew What do each of your sponsors say about this relationship?

29:36 Caller Well, she's been in the program now for over two years. So, you know, NA&A, you know...

29:42 Drew What does her sponsor say? Okay.

29:44 Caller The thing is, is that the two-year point had passed and, you know...

29:47 Drew Yeah, but it's not, it's not... But what?

29:51 Caller The sponsor had said that since she had straightened her life out and usually they could tell you to wait two years before getting in a relationship.

29:57 Drew Certainly one year, but it's not her that I'm concerned with. It's that she's getting involved with a newcomer.

30:01 Caller Right. Well, yeah. Well, I mean, I was going to NA meetings in prison and I haven't used for 18 months now.

30:07 Oh, okay.

30:08 Drew Well, then I give it my seal of approval. I think, you know, three months is plenty of time for you to sort of pay tribute to your girlfriend. Your girlfriend had a fatal disease. She succumbed to it. You're both in the program more than a year and a half. Your sponsors are giving you an approval. I think it's fine.

30:26 Adam Yeah.

30:26 Drew And it's a relationship that has worked in the past.

30:28 Adam Sort of.

30:29 Drew Be careful. Whatever it was that made you guys work as addicts together may drive you back to being addicted together. So be careful.

30:36 Adam All right. Well, good luck. And sorry about your. Well, I was going to say your ex, but she's only your ex. Good. She's your ex. She's an ex person. Amber, you're 16. Yes, sir. Shut that fan, please. Let's try to do some professional radio here for just one moment. Sorry for that interruption, Amber.

30:58 Drew I cannot breathe in here. I understand.

31:01 Adam Go ahead.

31:02 OK, I have a question. I want to know if it's like completely out of the question that I could ever be happy because out of the question.

31:10 Drew Impossible.

31:11 Impossible.

31:12 Drew No, you could never be happy. I've talked to you for three seconds. I know it's not possible.

31:16 Yeah. Sorry, baby. I can find like every fault. Every like a guy is either too rude and too blunt or is overly confident. I always find them a reason to be immature. You know, I want to keep them around as a friend because they're good people.

31:31 Drew I think when 16 to 18 year old women do this. Good people. I know. Believe me, that's not why they want to stay around, by the way. But be that as it may, I find that women 16 to 18 do this kind of thing. I think it's a healthy natural protection. I really do.

31:46 Adam Well, look at the alternative.

31:48 Drew Yeah, that's right. I think when you're doing that still 18, 19, 20, then I get a little more concerned with your having problems with intimacy.

31:54 Well, see, like, OK, I went out with this guy for 11 months. Like, we had a really, really comfortable relationship. I mean, he wasn't the brightest one, but he was, it was real relaxed. And all we did was have fun. Like, we always went to concerts and hung out and had a great time. Well, now, like, that me and him aren't seeing each other anymore. Every guy that, you know, I start talking to or I want to start dating, you know, like, right after it seems like right after I get him hooked, I realize, you know, maybe I should just keep him as a friend.

32:27 Drew Is there any reason you would have trouble with close relationships?

32:31 Well, I'm on Prozac, so I don't know if that has anything to do with it.

32:34 Drew Why are you on Prozac?

32:38 I guess because I'm angry all the time and nobody knows why.

32:41 Caller You're insane.

32:42 Adam Where's your daddy?

32:45 I have a really terrific stepdad.

32:48 Drew Where's your biological dad?

32:51 I moved in. Me and my mom did not get along too well when I was younger. And I moved in with him and.

32:57 Drew Oh, no, no, no.

33:00 Adam Hold on. I had to let another one go.

33:03 Caller Go ahead. Go ahead.

33:06 Adam Oh, you think you're angry. You'd be so angry if you were here right now.

33:10 Caller I am.

33:10 Adam Oh, Drew, don't blow it back at me. Drew's got this industrial fan that he's using for evil over there.

33:23 Drew Standing behind it. What are you talking about?

33:25 Caller All right.

33:26 What are you doing up there?

33:27 Adam I can't help it, baby.

33:29 He's up the roof.

33:31 Adam There's only so many cubic feet in this room, Drew. Eventually, it's got to make its way for the door.

33:38 No talent, ass clown.

33:39 Adam All right. I'm sorry, Amber.

33:41 Drew Oh, my God.

33:42 Adam What's up? You're 24. You've been married for three years and the thrill is gone.

33:46 Caller Yeah.

33:47 Adam What's your problem again?

33:48 Drew But now, you left your mom, moved in with your biological dad, right?

33:52 Caller Yeah.

33:52 Drew What happened with that?

33:53 Caller Okay. I used to be a daddy's girl, like after I moved in with my dad. I'm not as like depressed. Well, I guess maybe.

34:06 Drew What did he do to you? What happened?

34:07 Caller Well, he never really, he wasn't really abusive, but he got to the point where like he was really just completely scared of me.

34:16 Adam Oh, watch the S word there, baby.

34:19 Drew Unacceptable. That's abusive. That's the any lack of respect for your feelings and lack of mutuality in the exchange between you and he is his abuse.

34:29 Adam Well, just having your kid scared of you, scared you're going to hit them, scared you're going to fly off the handle, scared you're going to have another drink, scared you're going to do whatever. It's a bad thing to do to your kid.

34:43 Drew Really, Adam, take a page from that, will you, please?

34:45 Adam I got you scared.

34:48 Drew The idea being that feelings of powerlessness in childhood or young adolescents can be very destructive. You will begin to organize your personality or at least your relationships around avoiding powerlessness.

35:00 Adam All right.

35:00 Drew So you'll find, you know, you can't be vulnerable in a relationship. You might become powerless again. So you avoid them. And that's kind of the pattern.

35:07 Adam Stay with the Prozac. Stay with your counseling. I'm going to imagine you're talking to somebody about this.

35:14 Drew I hope so.

35:14 Adam Stick with that. You got a good stepdaddy. Good. As far as the guys, all right. So you're a little picky and you're kind of hot. And you got that 16 year old hot chick, pick the litter thing and enjoy it. Just enjoy it.

35:28 Drew But realize that you're avoiding intimacy a little bit. And be careful. She's going to pick abandoning guys. That's what she's going to do.

35:34 Adam Well, that's what she's scared of. All right. We're going to take a break. Drew, you're going to hang in here during the break. You're going to step out of the hole.

35:39 Drew No, I'm going to take a little breather outside.

35:41 Adam Interesting.

35:42 All right.

35:42 Adam We'll be back.

35:44 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

35:56 Caller Loveline with Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla on 94.7 NRK.

36:04 Welcome.

36:05 Caller Loveline with Dr. Drew and Adam Carolla on 94.7 NRK.

36:19 Caller Hey, this is Jim and Fletcher and Randy from Pennywise. You're listening to Love Line with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

36:27 Caller Thank you.

36:29 Caller Good night.

36:34 Adam I just let another big one fly.

36:36 Caller The fan does not work.

36:37 Adam Drew, come on, get the fan out of the microphone. Let's try to act like professionals. You know what brought the biggest laugh is I just looked in the room at Anderson. There's really no fart of the gas. No fan of the gas. No fan of the gas. That's how I know we could never really spend any time together, any quality time at least. And Ann over there who's not only not a fan of the gas, she's not a fan of the show at this point. And Tara, don't call me, Tara's over there, she's disgusted. Phone screener Damien's got a look of...

37:19 Drew Damien, you should have come as the one person that has some testosterone coursing through your veins. Come here, get a load of this. Seriously, get a load of this.

37:27 Caller I don't know, it's not the testosterone thing.

37:29 Caller It's just I don't get sick and tired of the fan and Adam's humor.

37:33 It's not funny.

37:34 Adam It's not funny. Drew thinks it's funny even though Drew's really been the recipient of it.

37:40 Drew Come in here, just step in here. Damien, step in.

37:43 Caller See, look at this.

37:44 Drew The 220 pound man was just decimated by that.

37:48 Caller Thank you.

37:49 Adam Thank you. Chris?

37:50 Yeah.

37:51 Adam You're 16.

37:52 Caller Hey.

37:52 Adam All right. What's up? How you guys doing? Well, Drew's in pretty bad shape.

37:56 Drew No, no.

37:57 Adam Drew's in bad shape.

37:58 Caller Drew sounds like Darth Vader now.

38:00 Drew That's not cool.

38:01 Adam Drew's talking through his shirt.

38:03 Drew It's through my shirt or I'm outside. You can hook me up a big cable to the outdoors and I'll stand out there and broadcast.

38:08 Adam Drew, how dare you compromise the show?

38:11 Drew I'm not compromising. I'll broadcast from out there.

38:13 Adam Chris, go ahead. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry for Drew.

38:18 Okay. About four or five months ago, I quit taking Paxil. I've been taking it for about a year and during that entire time, I couldn't get aroused or anything. And now it's been four months or whatever and I still can't. I can't have an orgasm or anything now.

38:33 Drew Do you want any other medication?

38:35 Caller Ambien occasionally.

38:36 I don't take it every night.

38:37 Drew Well, I might cut the Ambien back. That might be working against you.

38:41 Adam Who do you have an orgasm with?

38:43 More recently, my girlfriend. I just started becoming sexually active like two months ago. And even then, when I'm having sex, I still can't have it.

38:52 Drew So when you're really sort of comparing it to by yourself.

38:55 Yeah, it went by myself too. I can't ever.

38:58 Drew It's had no problem. And there was no problem before the Paxil.

39:01 Caller Right. Yeah.

39:04 Drew Are you depressed now?

39:06 No, not anymore. I was.

39:07 Drew Did you have any withdrawal from the Paxil?

39:10 Yeah.

39:10 Drew How long did that last?

39:11 For a while, but not anymore.

39:13 Drew How long did that last for?

39:14 Two weeks, maybe.

39:15 Drew What was the syndrome? Dizziness, that kind of thing?

39:18 I got like really sick to my stomach. And I think I puked a couple of times.

39:23 Caller I was about in. All right.

39:25 Adam So, Drew, what is this?

39:27 Drew I don't know because the Paxil can't still. What?

39:30 Adam It's just funny to watch you, you know, dispense important medical advice through your shirt.

39:36 Drew Yeah.

39:37 Caller Very funny.

39:37 Adam Thank you.

39:38 Drew I'm laughing. Yeah. Take the press on the outside.

39:44 Caller That's funny.

39:47 Adam Yeah. What do you think it is there, Drew?

39:49 Drew Chris, it can't still be the Paxil. That's out of your system very quickly. Whether or not it somehow disrupted your sexual functioning. I've never heard of anything like that happening. So it's hard for me to understand why you would have it, perhaps whatever anxiety, depression.

40:02 Adam You're a 16-year-old guy. Yeah.

40:04 Drew I mean, you should be checked out to be sure that there's not any kind of thyroid problem or other problems that might be lowering your testosterone levels. In other words, whatever was making you depressed, there's got to be somebody that's evaluating that to make sure that it's not a medical cause.

40:16 Adam So go to the doctor.

40:17 Drew It doesn't make sense. It's not fitting right now.

40:19 Adam Rachel?

40:20 Hi.

40:21 Adam You're 24. What's happening? Good looking?

40:24 Caller Well, my boyfriend recently bought me a vibrator because he can't be around as much as I'd like him to.

40:32 Adam I see. Why not?

40:35 Caller Well, his wife doesn't like him visiting me.

40:37 Adam His wife. Yeah. She's one of them. Uptight, huh?

40:41 Caller Yeah. I know. Can you believe it?

40:43 Adam How long have you been seeing this guy?

40:45 Caller About four or five months.

40:47 Adam And it's okay with you that he has a wife?

40:50 Caller Well, you know, I deal with it.

40:53 Adam Well, let me ask you this and be truthful if you can. Okay. It's one of two scenarios. One is you're just dying like hell for this guy to get away from his wife. And the other scenario is you don't want him to. Secretly, you're kind of scared of commitment and glad this guy's not on the open market. Even if it feels like it, there's a certain safety zone in dating a guy who essentially it can never turn in anything.

41:22 Drew That's right.

41:22 Caller Yeah. You know, I'm not really into commitment right now.

41:25 Drew All right. And she sounds like that kind of person.

41:26 Adam Right.

41:27 Drew Doesn't seem to bother her one bit.

41:28 Adam So that's what it is. OK. So you found the right guy.

41:31 Drew Yeah.

41:31 Caller But can I ask my question?

41:32 Adam You can also find guys in prison, by the way.

41:35 Drew Yeah. That's the other way to do that.

41:37 Adam All right. Yeah. So your question is.

41:39 Caller OK. Yeah. So he bought me a vibrator. And before our sex life was great. And since I've been using that, I'm kind of not even enjoying the sex anymore. And I'm wondering, does this mean I should stop using it or?

41:51 Drew Tell us why you're not enjoying it.

41:53 Caller I don't know. It just doesn't feel good. I'm not getting, I don't know, like as a rose as I used to.

41:57 Adam How much are you using the vibrator?

42:00 Caller Um, maybe once every other day or so.

42:03 Drew Why don't you cut it back a little bit? I mean, once every other week or so.

42:06 Adam Yeah. See if your vagina snaps back.

42:09 Drew You can't desensitize with the vibrator or either incorporate the vibrator into your activity with your boyfriend.

42:14 Adam How about that? Where do you know this guy from, Mark?

42:17 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

42:19 Adam Yeah. And what's his deal? Is he telling you he's going to leave his wife or is it just an agreement?

42:25 Caller No, we just, you know.

42:28 Adam Right.

42:29 Caller I don't want to. I've never asked him to leave his wife and he doesn't plan on it. They've been married for a long time.

42:35 Adam And but here's I guess what I'm asking. Does he give you a sort of a rap that he feels compelled to give you about, you know, what doesn't treat me right? His wife's diabetic. He doesn't get laid, but he's got kids. And, you know, it's important that he keeps a family together. Does he give you a sob story?

42:50 Caller No, no, they don't have kids. And wow, I think, you know, we just, you know, he needs something extra. You know, guys go through their midlife crisis or what?

42:58 Drew How old is he?

42:59 Caller Um, forty four.

43:01 Adam Oh, son of a bitch. It's a nail to hunt little twenty four year old floating around the office. Is this guy your boss? No, he's not.

43:12 Caller No, he's higher up, but he's not my boss.

43:16 Adam And how often do you guys get together?

43:19 Caller A couple of times a week.

43:20 Adam And is it kind of like clockwork? I mean, no, no, you don't have set days.

43:25 Caller No. And whenever we can both get away.

43:28 Adam And this has been going on for how long?

43:30 Caller About four months.

43:31 Adam And it's kind of fun, kind of naughty.

43:34 Caller Yeah.

43:34 Adam You do that. You do the daytime thing.

43:36 Caller Usually.

43:37 Adam How do you get away with that if you're both working?

43:41 Caller We work different hours.

43:42 Caller Let me see.

43:44 Drew That doesn't still help me understand it.

43:45 Adam It's still tough. Someone's got to get away with something, right?

43:48 Caller Yeah. Well, you know, I have a little more availability.

43:53 Adam Right. Because they miss him a little more around the office.

43:57 Caller Basically, we don't work in an office, so we don't have like a strict day out.

44:00 Adam And his wife doesn't suspect the thing or you don't know?

44:05 Drew You didn't like the way I sneezed into your coffee?

44:06 Adam Yeah. No, I didn't. No, thank you.

44:09 Caller I don't think she knows. I don't think she suspects.

44:12 Adam I mean, I've been to parties at the house and stuff and no, and you don't and this is perfectly fine for you for now.

44:19 Caller For now. It's not going to last forever, but you know, I'm busy and I don't really have time for a relationship anyway.

44:25 Drew So don't you don't you feel somehow? I don't know, like you're dishonest or doing something to hurt someone else.

44:32 Caller Yeah, yeah, I do.

44:34 Drew What did you do with it?

44:35 Caller I feel bad.

44:37 Adam Well, you're 24. It won't go on forever.

44:40 Caller Right. It probably won't go on much longer.

44:43 Adam All right. Good times.

44:45 Drew Stop using the vibrator so much.

44:47 Adam Yeah. And when it ends, you probably probably get something out of the guy.

44:51 Drew Yeah, that's right. A little distortion.

44:53 Adam Nothing wrong with that.

44:54 Drew And then the other way she could do is to start using the vibrator more and just kind of phase this guy out.

45:00 Caller Right.

45:03 Adam Or turn the vibrator on him if you want to really get him over. All right there. Good times, right?

45:09 Yeah.

45:10 Drew Hey, let's say thank you to Katherine May. I mean, you sent us this amazing basket. I think what's in here. I mean, this is all your favorite stuff.

45:20 Adam Yeah. Why did she send us this basket?

45:22 Drew She is entering a program and was thanking us for sort of alerting her to what her needs were and going ahead and getting some treatment for herself.

45:28 Adam Wow. And she spent her last. I mean, it's a really great basket. And the thing that's great about this basket is it's a custom basket.

45:35 Drew It has a she put all this stuff in here.

45:38 Adam Yeah, it has. It has The Shining, which is a movie that Drew has never seen everybody. And thank God I make eight Shining references a month so Drew can sit there with that stone face of his and have no idea what I'm talking about. When I say Johnny's back. No, wait a minute. Here's Johnny. That's all I hear is Johnny. Oh, true. You're going to go nuts when you see it.

46:04 Drew He says it right here.

46:07 Adam Yeah. On the cover. Drew's point of the picture. Drew, you're Spice Tea for my money. I think the greatest horror movie ever. I think right here, The Shining. I mean, here's a great thing about the movie Shining. It first off, it shifted gears, man. I mean, by the... Drew, would you shut up with that thing while I'm talking about The Shining here in the great Stanley Kubrick? This movie was a very slow build.

46:37 Drew Oh, really?

46:38 Adam Oh, yes. I mean, so by the time you're an hour into it, it still hasn't gotten too bad.

46:44 Drew Yeah.

46:44 Adam But you know what's coming. And there's just a million... It's not only scary and startling and, you know, gory and all that stuff, but it's just great. Lots of great twists. And Drew, you watch this movie. You hear me, you bastard. OK, so who do I thank? Catherine May? Yeah. Yeah. Thanks, baby. She sent everything. All right. What are we doing here, Drew? Taking a break. All right. We'll be back.

47:12 All right, guys, here's the deal.

47:14 Caller Looking to hook up.

47:15 Caller Call the Dateline.

47:16 Caller Sick of wasting time with the wrong person.

47:18 Caller Call the Dateline.

47:18 Caller One call is all you need to make.

47:20 Caller Call the Dateline.

47:21 Caller 1-877-889. Date.

47:25 Caller You know what I'm saying now, Dan?

47:27 Caller Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline.

47:47 Caller On GIO Get It On, with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla, on 94.7 NRK.

48:11 Adam No, no. I mean, yeah, but no, no. All right. It's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Drew, I think that the gas has passed. Pardon the pun.

48:39 Drew No.

48:41 Adam Well, I've been going all weekend.

48:42 Drew So I'm watching a lot about the military operations this weekend.

48:50 Adam All right.

48:50 Drew Yeah, there's a primary attack, secondary attack and the diversionary attack.

48:53 Adam I say, I say, yeah, lull you into a false sense of security.

48:58 Caller Right.

49:00 Adam All right. It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla, Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Travis in here tomorrow night. And then Tony Hawk on Wednesday night. So Big Bill here. Oh, I wasn't I wasn't planned. I really I thought I thought I was done with it. I was over here. Oh, well, that I can't help.

49:28 Drew Oh, man, I swear to God, I'm going to start crying. It's like bringing tears to my eyes.

49:35 Adam All right. Sorry, buddy.

49:39 Caller Oh, Lordy.

49:40 Caller Wow.

49:41 Adam Anderson, turn the heat up in here. I rarely ask you to do that, but it's really cool in here. I'm I'm I'm freezing my ass off.

49:50 Drew I don't need to move.

49:51 Adam All right, Sarah, hey, you're a man.

50:02 Caller Sarah, something that's unholy.

50:07 Adam Say something that is holy is my underpants. Now, Sarah, this is bad times in here, baby. Bad times. What's up?

50:17 Caller Well, I broke up with my boyfriend of two years. I don't know about a month ago. I have no feelings for him at all anymore. I met this other guy off the line.

50:27 Drew Like in a chat room or something?

50:29 Caller Actually, he IM'd me.

50:30 I don't know how he found my screen name.

50:32 Adam How's that IM work, Drew?

50:35 Drew The instant messaging?

50:36 Adam That's what it is. I don't know what it stood for. So he instant messaged you. So he must have known you somehow, right?

50:44 Caller Well, you can look people up online.

50:48 Drew You don't just randomly IM people, do you?

50:50 Caller Sometimes.

50:51 Adam You're super desperate. Okay. So he IM'd you.

50:55 Caller Right. And I start talking to him for about two weeks or so, two, three weeks. And then I go meet him. And we like really hit it off and everything is like perfect. Like I can't, it's indescribably perfect. And we have sex about a week and a half later. And then everything is perfect for another week. And I get an email saying that he has two kids with his ex-girlfriend.

51:20 Adam Oh, yeah.

51:21 Drew He sounds like a perfect guy. How old is he? 19 with two kids? He should be on that FBI list.

51:30 Adam His balls should be up on this big hairy balls should be right next to Ben Laden.

51:34 Caller Well, actually it's her fault.

51:36 Adam Oh, of course.

51:37 Drew Yeah, of course. That night with two kids has nothing to do with it.

51:40 Caller No, I mean, he does, but she like tried to keep him around by getting pregnant, stop taking her pills and stuff like that.

51:47 Adam So now what?

51:48 Caller So I get this email saying that he doesn't know if he can do with just one person from because he's been with her for like three years and even though he's not going to be with her and I don't know, I don't understand it like at all.

52:00 Drew Yeah, he's a, can you say douche bag on the radio?

52:03 Adam Yeah, he, yeah, he I.D.d you, yeah, internet dumped you.

52:07 Drew It's the same guy that desperately sends out his I.M.s, the same guy that once he's scored is not interested anymore.

52:13 Adam Well, let me, as long as we're on initials, let me give you this guy's MO.

52:18 Drew The I.M.s, then D.M.s.

52:19 Adam Yeah, that's his MO. He's just an idiot.

52:23 I don't know. I don't know.

52:25 Drew Sarah, yes, he is. And he's got two kids at 19, please.

52:28 Adam Just say FU to this guy and move on, would you?

52:31 Drew FU via I.M.s, so his DM response is IM.

52:35 Caller I kind of think and everybody else kind of thinks that knows him and like saw everything that happened kind of thinks that she said that like he probably couldn't see his kids unless he got rid of me or something.

52:44 Caller Why do you give an RF.?

52:45 Drew Why do you give an RF.? I agree with that.

52:47 Adam Well, listen, Sarah, how big is your ass that you're this desperate at 18?

52:54 Caller Not.

52:55 Adam Do you know what I'm saying?

52:56 Drew Yeah.

52:57 Adam What's wrong with you?

52:58 Caller Nothing.

52:58 Adam I mean, are you just albino trash?

53:01 Caller No, I'm just...

53:02 Adam Are you super white trash?

53:04 Caller No, not at all.

53:05 Adam What's wrong with you? You're 18 years old. This guy says he wants out, but now your hypothesis is, well, he doesn't really want out, but she forced him out by holding the fact that this 19-year-old couldn't see his two kids over his head.

53:20 Drew Now, mind you, she's the same evil witch that made sure that he got trapped in that relationship because...

53:25 Adam Yes, Sarah, Sarah, let me tell you something about white trash. You want to know what the cornerstone of white trash is? Here's how you know you're white trash. Turn on Jerry Springer. It's the two women duking it out over the guy who's boned both of them and has got them both pregnant. It's the two women going at it.

53:44 Drew As opposed to both of them trying to cut his nuts off.

53:46 Adam This guy's 19. He's got two kids. It's not his fault. This guy met you over the Internet. Now he wants he's boned you a few times. Now he wants out.

53:55 Drew Not his fault.

53:55 Adam No, it's his girl. That's white trash, baby. What happened to you? What happened? I don't know. All right. But look, let's let's rise above. Here's the deal. It's just right. Here's the thing, everybody. You may feel in your heart of hearts like you're just super, just translucent jellyfish, clear trash, but you don't have to act that out on the world. Hold your head up. You're 18. You don't got any kids, right? You're not pregnant. You're fine. You're not hooked on heroin.

54:30 Drew It's not. It's none of it is about the other person, right?

54:33 Adam Just meet a decent guy or don't meet a decent guy.

54:37 Drew Here, meet reality on reality's terms. Right.

54:40 Adam Hey, Sarah, what are you doing? Thinking about junior college?

54:43 Drew Yeah.

54:44 Adam Okay. Stop thinking about junior college.

54:46 Drew And go.

54:46 Adam No, don't go. Get a job. Get a job. Make some money. Move out. Get independent. Hang with your friends. Stop worrying about guys. Don't live your life for guys. They're not going to make you feel this way or make you feel that way. You understand?

55:02 Drew Yeah.

55:02 Adam Just get a good job and dump this idiot with the two kids who's 19.

55:06 Drew Don't you agree we would also say just based on her intense attraction for this a-hole, she should not trust her attractions.

55:14 Adam No.

55:14 Drew Attractions will lead you to another super white trash guy.

55:17 Adam My friend said that she was making him break up with me because she was threatening the two kids. Oh, yeah. This poor angel. Again, he was victimized by this poor woman who a. somehow got pregnant twice, forced him, massaged his penis until it was filled with blood, and then inserted it in her and robbed him of his precious seed on two occasions. This guy's an idiot. Please. Oh, what is up with you chicks with these guys? Met her on the internet.

55:54 Caller Pete.

55:55 Adam Yes. Pete, you're 15. What's up? Yeah.

55:58 Caller Okay. Um, like, I don't want you guys to think, like, this is a lie or nothing, but, like, this is more of a quest to Dr. Drew.

56:05 Drew Yeah.

56:06 Caller It's a damn lie and you know it.

56:08 Drew Go ahead.

56:09 Caller I, like, about three weeks ago, I made my friends, like, my friend had pierced his own nipples, like, about a month ago, like, before I did. And he said he did it himself. And he got a safety pin and he did one of mine.

56:27 Drew Right.

56:28 Caller And I had it in for about three weeks. Then I had, like, wrestling coming up.

56:33 Drew And then what started coming up?

56:35 Caller Wrestling.

56:36 Adam Wrestling. Was practices coming up? Wrestling season?

56:40 Caller Yeah. And I didn't, like, want them, like, to get pulled out.

56:43 Drew Good times.

56:44 Caller Right.

56:45 Caller So, like, I took mine out, like, a couple of days ago.

56:48 Drew These were two of them. One of each?

56:50 Caller I just did my last one.

56:51 Caller All right.

56:52 Caller And, like, the hole's kind of held up, but there's kind of like a little, like, like, like a lump-type thing. Yeah.

57:02 Caller Right.

57:02 Drew That's scar. Maybe even infection.

57:05 Caller Yeah.

57:05 Adam It's probably some scar. So what's the question?

57:07 Caller Yeah, like, I heard that that could be, like, cancer or something.

57:11 Caller No.

57:12 Drew No. Not when you've, you've sort of, you've speared yourself, and now it's healing. After you take an object out, that's scarring, that's healing. Or perhaps some foreign material left behind, infection, that sort of thing can cause the same thing.

57:25 Adam All right.

57:25 Drew Okay.

57:26 Adam Good enough there, Pete. You'll be fine. All right. Easy on those nipples.

57:29 Drew Easy on the foreign bodies through your body parts. Okay. All right. Normally people, the normal human sort of behavior is to avoid sharp objects hitting towards your body. What do you say?

57:42 Adam Yeah. Listen, I don't know what happened to. Listen, I don't want to date myself, but back in my day, Oh, pops. If one of my friends want to put something through his nipple, he was just a pure homo. Well, I mean, that's like, hey, faggot, what are you doing?

57:58 Drew Now that could you not wait to like weirdo meets homo?

58:05 Adam Well, you really were.

58:07 Drew Okay.

58:07 Adam I mean, part queer, part weird. Like you're like a circus dude or something. That's a weird notion. Listen, you 15 year old males who are heterosexual, leave your nipples alone. Tell your buddies to leave them alone too.

58:21 Drew Save those fears for the penis?

58:22 Adam Urinating on them. That's fine. Yeah.

58:25 Drew On your friends.

58:26 Adam Yeah.

58:26 Drew Yeah, of course.

58:27 Caller Sure.

58:27 Drew Or even your, you know.

58:29 Adam The penis piercings and the nipple stuff. Isn't that so weird? Is it just me or is that just a weird heterosexual? I mean, here's what I'm saying. The penis piercings and the nipple piercings for the heterosexual male is a little weird to me. It seems like a kind of confused sexuality thing.

58:49 Drew I was bored, so I had my tongue pierced. I was bored, so I put a spear through my penis.

58:54 Adam It just seems weird to me. I mean, like I said, maybe I'm old-fashioned.

58:59 Drew You are.

58:59 Adam I don't like straight guys with earrings, either. I just don't like guys with the jewelry. It's a weird, I don't know. Maybe it's just homophobia or something. I don't know what it is. I don't like guys with jewelry. It's weird, and the jewelry, the full-time jewelry is even weirder. I don't like it. I don't like watching Ed Bradley give his interviews with a big pirate hoop he's got hanging out of his ear. It's like, what are you, a journalist or a pirate? Elisa?

59:32 Caller Hey, I just wanted to say to Drew, my most sincere condolences go out to you for having to deal with Adams.

59:40 Drew No, Elisa, you don't even understand.

59:43 Adam It's a tough night.

59:43 Drew This has been some sort of monumental expression of his.

59:48 Caller I'm horribly sorry.

59:50 Adam Let me say this, true to Elisa. It's been tough on everyone. And it's just like a lot of the heroes that fell on September 11th. Not only do your hearts go out to them, but what about the family?

1:00:05 Drew Yeah.

1:00:05 Adam What about Drew's family? What about the triplets?

1:00:07 Drew I'm going home crippled.

1:00:09 Adam What about Anne and Anderson over there in the next room?

1:00:12 Drew Yeah.

1:00:13 Adam They have not been harmed the way you have. No one would dare suggest that. But they also are going to need some therapy.

1:00:24 Drew They're taking you home with them too. Yes.

1:00:25 Adam Yeah. Importantly, so thanks. We're going to have a benefit concert, actually. Try to raise money for Drew's family. I'll be there. All right. So what's up? I'm going to sing Taboo 2, Adam, Break Wind into the microphone.

1:00:37 Caller Okay. Anyways, I'm on Prozac because I was cutting myself. And like, yeah, you're disappointed a little thing. I've called the show before and you said Prozac and therapy. So I got Prozac and I got therapy. Oh, good. But the Prozac made me stop cutting, but it doesn't really deal with the depression. Like, I mean, I'm still feeling really depressed. And like I took Paxil before and that really worked for me. And it was cool. But I don't know if like, should I ask my doctor if it's cool to double up on these medicines?

1:01:12 Drew Yeah, you should expect that the medication you take should have a reasonably good effect on your depression. It may not completely eradicate it, but you should expect to feel pretty decent. In other words, if you stop cutting, but you're still depressed, that's not enough from the medication. You need to be, your doctor should be able to get you to the point that both are quite well handled. And then you stay in the therapy. So, ultimately, whatever is sort of setting this all up can be more thoroughly dealt with.

1:01:43 Caller All right.

1:01:44 Adam Melissa?

1:01:45 Caller Yes.

1:01:45 Adam You're 19?

1:01:46 Caller Yeah.

1:01:47 Adam What's up, Tuts?

1:01:48 Drew 11, 9, and 3 and 4.

1:01:51 Adam Yeah, but in a happy way.

1:01:52 Drew Yeah, but each of those years, something happened.

1:01:55 Caller What?

1:01:57 Adam No. Go ahead, baby.

1:01:59 Drew You put money on it? What's going on?

1:02:03 Adam Just from her voice, talk a little more, Melissa.

1:02:07 Caller Well, I'm 19, and my boyfriend is 22. And before, like when I started dating him, he had never tried drugs or he didn't really drink that much. And now he started to get into, like, smoking weed a lot, like every day. And it's kind of, like, taken over his, like, nighttime activities, kind of. So I was like, I was wondering what it does to him and what it's going to mean, like.

1:02:37 Adam All right, hold on a second. Ready? You want to, okay. You want to bet? Cause I'm going with nothing. Oh, come on. That's my vibe. You know, you've lost me like four times in a row now, Drew.

1:02:50 Drew It's true.

1:02:53 Adam I say nothing.

1:02:54 Drew And you can't fart and distract. No, I won't.

1:02:58 Adam I say nothing. Go ahead.

1:02:59 Drew Let's talk to her.

1:03:00 Adam No, no, go ahead.

1:03:01 Drew Oh, I like your prediction. I just I just got three, four, 11, nine. Something, something happy to those years. Three, three, three to four. Something happened for some like major there.

1:03:10 Adam And then nine to 11, nine and 11.

1:03:12 Drew Like, like, OK, three or four, like some sexual abuse. Nine dad leaves 11. Right. How about that?

1:03:17 Adam All right. Well, we'll keep our fingers crossed. Melissa, what about it? What about what about your dad?

1:03:26 Caller My dad is perfectly fine. He's way younger than my mom, but he hasn't left us or anything. He's my dad.

1:03:33 Adam And does he does he drink?

1:03:36 Caller Um, yeah, at home sometimes.

1:03:38 Drew Does he smoke pot?

1:03:39 Caller I think it like all crazy or anything.

1:03:42 Drew Did you were you around someone in your family that did get all crazy?

1:03:44 Caller Huh?

1:03:45 Drew Was there someone in your family that would get all crazy?

1:03:47 Caller Um, no.

1:03:49 Adam Have you ever been raped?

1:03:52 Drew Would you have been raped?

1:03:53 Caller Would you like to be raped?

1:03:55 Caller Huh?

1:03:55 Adam No, never been raped? No?

1:03:57 Caller No.

1:03:57 Adam Molested?

1:03:58 Caller No.

1:03:58 Adam When did you lose your virginity?

1:04:00 Caller When I was 14.

1:04:01 Adam How old was the guy?

1:04:02 Caller 15.

1:04:04 Adam And your boyfriend? Was your boyfriend?

1:04:07 Drew How old is he?

1:04:08 Adam How old? No, no. Yeah, how old is your current boyfriend? 22, right? Did your dad ever hit you, ever strike you?

1:04:15 Caller No, but I have had a boyfriend that has hit me.

1:04:18 Drew How old were you when he had him?

1:04:20 Caller How old was I? That was my first boyfriend, the first guy I had sex with.

1:04:24 Drew And you were 14.

1:04:25 Adam What did you do?

1:04:27 Caller Well, I didn't do anything because I didn't know what a relationship was. And so I like expected it kind of. But then my dad caught him. So he kind of like got a restraining order.

1:04:39 Adam Oh, really?

1:04:40 Caller All right.

1:04:41 Adam All right, baby, I'm going to take that money now. Thank you, baby.

1:04:45 Drew Thank you, baby. What's going on here?

1:04:47 Adam Yeah, no, I'm kind of OK with Melissa. And she got a young voice, but I'm 14.

1:04:52 Drew She has a guy beat the crap out of her. I mean, no, but when you were 14, you accepted physical abuse.

1:04:59 Caller No, I didn't know how a relationship is.

1:05:02 Drew Yeah. But what? Well, the last thing someone would assume would be physical abuse would be what a relationship would be.

1:05:06 Caller Yeah. But unless some of my sister has been abused, too.

1:05:10 Drew Right.

1:05:10 Oh, he abused her boyfriend.

1:05:13 Adam But all right. Well, wait a minute. Now, what's going on here? What about your dad? He never raised a hand to you, too?

1:05:20 Caller No, he's never touched me.

1:05:22 Adam And what about grandpa or uncles?

1:05:26 Caller They're not around. We're the only people out in California.

1:05:30 Drew And when you were much, much younger, everything was OK in the house?

1:05:34 Caller From what I can remember, I wasn't really around because I was involved in like gymnastics and stuff.

1:05:39 Adam Eating disorder.

1:05:40 Drew Here we go.

1:05:41 Adam Eating disorder.

1:05:42 Caller What?

1:05:43 Adam Eating disorder.

1:05:44 Caller I had an eating disorder.

1:05:45 Adam There we go. That doesn't count.

1:05:49 Drew I know it doesn't, but let's keep going here.

1:05:51 Adam No, that's not.

1:05:52 Drew Listen, we're just starting to begin to unearth the story here. Now, when you were three and four, why did you move out to California?

1:05:59 Caller No, we've always been out here.

1:06:01 Drew OK. And what is it you don't remember about your childhood?

1:06:04 Caller I wasn't around that much.

1:06:06 Adam She was at gymnastics practice.

1:06:08 Drew Did those guys ever have any bad experiences?

1:06:11 Caller They were kind of weird. They never really molested me, but they were just kind of touchy, like, you know, like, I don't know, just little sexual comments.

1:06:21 Adam No, it's called spotting. Come on. You're up on the balance beam. You got some hot piece of nine-year-old unitard ass up there. I mean, come on, you got to make a comment. Plus, most of these coaches are from these, you know, they're from inside the iron curtain. They don't have rules about that stuff over there. It's part of their culture.

1:06:40 Drew Where did you get the idea that physical abuse is OK in a relationship? Did your dad do something to your mom or? No, I just...

1:06:46 Caller No, listen, Drew, I kind of just accepted it.

1:06:50 Drew I understand. Let's see what the weird thing. That, you know, he's an addict. That's going to affect your relationship profoundly. Having a relationship with an addict is a very difficult and sometimes painful thing to get involved with. Make no mistake about it, for some people, marijuana is profoundly addictive. In the short term, it's going to start affecting his ability to go out and do things. It's going to make him irritable, moody. It's going to affect his sexual performance and his interest in sex and your relationship. The important thing in his life is going to be his weed.

1:07:17 Adam All right. Good times. Drew out another buck, everybody.

1:07:21 Drew I swear there's still more there.

1:07:22 Adam Well, eating disorder, you know.

1:07:25 Drew There's more there.

1:07:26 Adam Let me say this, Drew. I have heard from women before, and I know this doesn't jive with what you always talk about on this show and what I talk about on this show, but I've talked to women before who had a first boyfriend, who wasn't a great guy, who may have done some things to them and who had nothing to compare it to and who didn't let it go on for five years but got a bad guy and wasn't sure if this was what it is or not, just like you do as a kid with your parents. Some people get bad parents and they kind of think, oh hey, this is what it is.

1:08:04 Drew Yeah, but people who, there are many, many ways that people can have such crappy self-esteem that they'll assume it's something about them that that's just the way they have to accept or what relationships are all about. Anyone with a modicum of self-esteem will go, hey, enough of this crap, get out of here immediately.

1:08:21 Adam But they do, they do get out, but it's not that black and white because they're 14 or they're 15 and they've never been in a relationship. And these guys sometimes are a little bit manipulative and they tell them things and they're kind of scared to make a move. And a few months goes by and then they get out.

1:08:39 Drew Yeah, OK.

1:08:40 Adam Or the dad steps in, in this case, or something like that.

1:08:44 Drew But usually, again, there's got to be something, some sort of intrusiveness in their parenting that makes them sort of anticipating intrusions of various types.

1:08:52 Caller Yeah.

1:08:52 Drew Because people that don't want intrusion, it won't have it.

1:08:56 Adam Let me say this, forget about that.

1:08:57 Drew You're going to fart.

1:08:58 Adam I was watching 60 Minutes tonight.

1:09:00 Caller Yeah.

1:09:00 Adam I was just thinking about all these pussy European nations. And I want to say this to all the anti-war freaks out there. And here's the bottom line with this stuff. They were talking about Ben Laden's second-in-command, this 50-year-old doctor, so-and-so, who's kind of considered, at least to hear 60 Minutes tell it, first-in-command. This guy's been around, and he's kind of the brains of the operation. And they think he was responsible for the suicide boat bombing they did a couple of years ago in the embassies and all this kind of stuff. And had did quite a bit of the planning with the September 11th Twin Tower situation. The point is, is this guy was caught, he had years, he was with the Islamic Jihad or something, and they finally caught this guy and it was in Europe. And the point is, is they would not extradite the guy because he was in France, or he was in England, or he was somewhere in Western Europe. And they do not extradite people who could possibly be put to death. And the country that wanted the guy back was going to put him to death. So, they would not extradite him. So, they kept him and he sort of roamed around Europe. And then he got lost. And then ten years later, we lose 6,000 people in the World Trade Center. Here's what I'm saying. Sometimes death equals life.

1:10:30 Drew Right.

1:10:31 Adam You see, you see.

1:10:32 Drew Why is it we all going to agree about Hitler that way? Oh, we would have killed Hitler if we got a hold of him.

1:10:36 Adam Right. But this guy that you were so fundamentally opposed to killing or having the opportunity for this government to try and possibly kill was not only responsible or had quite a quite a hand in the Twin Towers, but embassy bombings and many, many, many other. I mean, you could you could you could theoretically connect another 10,000 lives to this guy who you didn't want to kill for fundamental reasons. That's what I want everyone to think about. That's what I want people to think about when they're out there protesting the war and the bombing and the seals going in in the campaign that we're in right now. You're so against the loss of life, then just use your logic and let's do the math here. You see what I'm saying? One will get you 10,000. That's good math. We'll work with that. All right. We'll be back.

1:11:40 Caller Loveline on 947-NRK is brought to you by Car Toys and by The Cobalt Lounge.

1:12:14 Caller Hey, this is Jim, and I'm Tom. We play in the band Jimmy Eat World. You're listening to Love Line with Dr. Drew and Adam Corolla.

1:12:21 Caller Hey, that was my theme song.

1:12:27 Adam Hey, jacket slung over the shoulder. I do that move with my sunglasses where I see someone I recognize and I lean down and peek at them over the...

1:12:36 Caller Oh, wait a minute.

1:12:37 Drew This is what we hear.

1:12:40 Adam Wind up beanie. Dad's funky corduroy jacket.

1:12:45 Drew No, you can go ahead and enter just the way you describe it. And this is still what we'll hear.

1:12:49 Caller Oh, really?

1:12:49 Drew Yeah.

1:12:52 Adam All right.

1:12:54 Caller All right.

1:12:57 Adam Let's move forward with the show. I gotta warn everybody beside the guest.

1:13:07 Drew This is the bubble over my head when I'm talks. What was that?

1:13:13 Adam Tooth is killing me. I got this, you know, my horrible root canal that went south about five years ago.

1:13:21 Caller I think it's Jesus Christ.

1:13:24 Adam I'm in constant pain, constant pain. I'm producing pus and I'm swelling. I can't sleep.

1:13:32 Caller I can't focus.

1:13:34 Adam Listen, I need more ambient. I need more prescription drugs, true.

1:13:39 Caller Let me tell you something about these dentists, too. They're all high and mighty.

1:13:44 Adam They think they're geniuses, these people. I'm telling you, saddle making has come further Oh, and I gotta have the crown pulled off, and my family's a mess, and my grandmother's giving me the stink eye.

1:14:10 Drew Huh? You say something?

1:14:14 Adam Drew, is that what it sounds like when I'm talking?

1:14:16 Drew What are you talking about?

1:14:17 Adam All right. Jake?

1:14:19 Drew Hi, guys. That's how I deal with your talking, okay? It may be whatever it else here is, but that's how I manage it.

1:14:24 Adam Thank you, Jake. You're 19. What's happening?

1:14:27 Caller I just wanted to say to both of you guys, I think you guys are doing a service to the world, or however, I don't know how...

1:14:37 Drew He's wondering if we broadcast the world or not.

1:14:39 Adam Well, I think we get into parts of Canada.

1:14:41 Drew There you go. It's the world.

1:14:42 Caller Okay. The greater 48 in Canada.

1:14:44 Adam Right.

1:14:45 Drew Oh, you're asking why in here too.

1:14:46 Adam So it's what we do?

1:14:47 Drew Yeah.

1:14:48 Adam All right.

1:14:49 Caller And specifically, I'd like to say, Adam, I don't think you got enough credit for your vegetarian joke.

1:14:55 Adam Yeah.

1:14:55 Caller Best joke I've heard on the air. I've listened to you guys for several years now.

1:14:59 Drew Well, Jimmy validated it.

1:15:01 Adam Slice of genius. Yeah. Just to catch everybody up. But I'm not blowing my own horn. It's just bad radio when you talk about something and nobody knows what it is. Some chick called up, was having problems with the condoms. She was from Berkeley, seemed like an earth mother type. Drew suggested she go with the animal skins. She rejected the animal skin condom. Drew said, why not? And I yelled, she's a vegetarian. Genius.

1:15:33 Drew And we barely missed a beat and went on.

1:15:36 Adam No, Drew just kept piling forward. I had to stop and make sure that everyone acknowledged my genius on that. Thank you, Jake.

1:15:43 Caller And also Dr. Drew, I think you're doing a service, both you guys. Right.

1:15:47 Drew Thanks, Jake.

1:15:48 Adam By steamrolling over my brilliant material. Thank you, Jake.

1:15:53 Caller You're welcome.

1:15:53 Adam I'll remember you.

1:15:55 Caller I'm sure you won't.

1:15:56 Adam All right. That's true. Let's talk to Kenneth, who's 24.

1:16:01 Caller Kenneth?

1:16:01 Caller Hey, how's it going?

1:16:03 Caller Hey.

1:16:05 Drew I'm looking at this nice note from Catherine May, who sent us this huge basket. She says, you literally saved my life. Literally.

1:16:12 Adam God bless this woman. What's up there, Kenneth?

1:16:16 Caller Based on my relationship, me and my girlfriend, we've been together in about a little bit over four years. We have a one-year-old son, but things are going a little bit okay. But after a while, with her working, with both of us basically working nights, we hardly got to see each other. Now, currently, we don't live together anymore, but we're still together.

1:16:41 Drew Why did you move out?

1:16:43 Caller She moved back in with her parents. She stayed for financial reasons to save some more money.

1:16:48 Adam You both working nights should be all right.

1:16:51 Drew I was going to say, why is that a problem?

1:16:52 Adam She's got the whole day together?

1:16:54 Caller Well, that's just it. She works basically any time from the afternoon to add nine hours on to that and does a lot of overtime. I work the graveyard shift.

1:17:07 Drew So she's going to bed when you're getting home?

1:17:11 Caller Kind of like that. Well, she's already asleep.

1:17:15 Adam Right.

1:17:15 Caller So now, when I wake up, she's leaving.

1:17:18 Drew All right.

1:17:18 Adam So what's the problem?

1:17:20 Caller Well, we don't live together anymore, so we hardly see each other. But I always try to make time. I always try to make time for her, for her and my son and everything. But she is like, I'm doing everything to spend time with her. And she's not doing nothing for me. Yeah. And then the fact.

1:17:40 Drew Maybe she's not interested in this relationship.

1:17:43 Caller Well, that's what I try to ask her about. And she tells me, oh, no, nothing's wrong. Don't worry about it.

1:17:50 Adam I'm just moving out and not seeing you anymore.

1:17:52 Drew Yeah, no, it's something's very wrong. She may not be able to tell you, but something's obviously up.

1:17:57 Caller Well, see, that's what I asked her. You know, I asked her...

1:18:01 Drew Here's what you know. She's unable to tell you that, but something is up.

1:18:05 Adam Well, yeah, Kenneth, here's the situation. I know it's real confusing because what happens is you come at them and you say, what's up? What's wrong? You're not into this. And they say, no, no, no, it's not that. I still love you. This is financial. I need time to collect myself, blah, blah, blah. But there's certain bottom line is she's not with you. She ain't with you. And my God, is that the bottom line, man.

1:18:33 Drew Yeah.

1:18:33 Adam And you'll hear...

1:18:35 Drew Especially at 24, it's not like you're both 30 year old business people. Yeah. You're traveling and you get together once a month. This is not that.

1:18:42 Adam You'll hear everything under the sun. But man, when it comes to relationships, it is the bottom line. And Drew, they don't tell you that. And you know, you know, it doesn't you know, you know, movies and literature do not support this either.

1:18:58 Drew Right.

1:18:58 Adam And it's horrible stuff because you know, they do in movies all the time. There's a couple that's very much in love. But the father of the woman finds out that this lad is Jewish and he's an anti-Semite. So he says to her in the movie, if you see that Jew again, you'll never see your little brother. So then they do the they do the thing. And she goes, I have to break up with you. Why? Why? I thought we were so in love. I just have to. I have to go. And they go back to the home. Well, listen, let me tell you reality. The reality is she's she's banging your best buddies. The reality. Movies do this all the time. But in real life, it almost never happens. Drew, think about every relationship you've ever had. Think about every relationship you've ever known of or any good friend of yours, male or female, whatever side of it you're on. When people stop seeing each other, one of them or both of them ain't into each other. It's usually one of them ain't into it anymore. Never does it have to do with finance, religion, none of that, I need time, I gotta find myself, I gotta collect myself.

1:20:11 Drew When people are really into a relationship, they're into it. They find a way to do it.

1:20:14 Adam Listen to our callers. They're sticking with junkies that are incarcerated. Forget about ideology. Well, he's a Democrat and I'm a Republican. No, if you're into it, you're into it. Kenneth, you got a kid with this girl and you deserve the truth, I think, because of the child that you have between you. But just back off a little and see what the actions are. Don't keep coming at her. She'll come to you.

1:20:43 Drew If she's into it, but she's not.

1:20:45 Adam She moved out and now she ain't around. So what does that mean? Ain't in. Nicole?

1:20:52 Drew Yeah. And may not be capable of, you know what I mean? And not into it may not mean anything to do with him.

1:20:57 Adam Right.

1:20:58 Drew It may be everything about her ability to be in a relationship or to stay in a relationship.

1:21:02 Adam Listen, kiddies, this is why you don't knock up chicks who you're not married to and who you don't know that well and who you're too young to start a family with. Because now, instead of walking away, you got this. You're strapped now. Nicole, go ahead, baby.

1:21:18 All right. I just lost my virginity to one of my good friends' twin brother a couple months ago.

1:21:25 Drew Hold on a second.

1:21:26 Adam Yeah. Did you think it was your good friend?

1:21:31 Well, she is my good friend. Like, I was having problems with an ex-boyfriend that hit me.

1:21:35 Adam Oh, wait a minute. She has a male twin brother? Yeah.

1:21:39 Drew Fraternal twin.

1:21:41 Adam Okay, goofball.

1:21:43 And then we met him up there. Like, she lives in Florence, Oregon. And I met him for like three days. Anyway, I was getting stoned with weed. And I, like, had sex with him. I lost my virginity or whatever.

1:21:54 Drew And Nicole, you mentioned the weed as though it was just that one time. I can tell from your voice that Nicole is a daily thing. There's no doubt you're doing the weed every day.

1:22:02 Well, not every day.

1:22:03 Drew Okay, you missed one day.

1:22:04 Adam Well, she does resins on Sundays because she's out.

1:22:06 No, it's not like that.

1:22:08 Drew Okay, Nicole, I can hear you're high right now then.

1:22:10 No, I'm not.

1:22:11 Drew Well, then we hear it in your voice. You can hear the residual effects of heavy, heavy speed. I mean, marijuana.

1:22:15 Caller Oh my God.

1:22:17 No. Okay. Anyway, like the first time we did it, like, you know, you're a virgin or I was a virgin, so I was kind of like thinking towards the whole thing. Well, like we did it again the second night, and it was more like I'm too conscious about hearing like the noises that it makes. Like, yeah.

1:22:37 Adam Was there somebody else in the in the world?

1:22:39 It was just us.

1:22:41 Drew Like queefing noises?

1:22:42 Like, like vagina farting or something. Yeah.

1:22:47 Adam That's why you got to always, you got to play Black Dog by Led Zeppelin. It drowns it out and, you know, I think that's why it moistens up the chicks.

1:22:56 And so I'll like concentrate on them noises. So like with him, like I just wanted to get it over with. But like, I went to my ex-boyfriend's house, not the one that hit me recently, but the other one, like a long time ago.

1:23:10 Adam And... Hold on, baby. Are you, are you some like a 28 year old chick with four kids who just got sprung from prison?

1:23:17 No, I just sort of got...

1:23:18 Adam Out of rehab. I know, but that, you're 16.

1:23:21 Caller I know.

1:23:22 Adam What's, what's the deal? I mean, not my boy, not this guy, but the boyfriend. Yeah.

1:23:28 Drew No kidding.

1:23:28 Adam You're 16. Jesus Christ. Can you slow it down just a, just a click or two?

1:23:35 Caller Well, yeah. Okay. But just answer this question first. I went to my ex-boyfriend's a couple weeks ago and we were all getting stoned or whatever. And...

1:23:45 Drew So it was just that one time again.

1:23:47 Caller No, it wasn't like a one time. It's like, I'm not a stoner, like getting high every day. But like when I'm around it, I'll do it kind of thing.

1:23:54 Adam Right. But you hang around with people and smoke a ton of weed. Yeah. So you're around it every day. So go ahead.

1:24:01 Caller Okay.

1:24:02 Caller Anyway, like with him, when we were doing like, I kind of like gave in to do it. And with him, like when he was, you know, moving in and out, like every time he moved in, like I felt like I had to pee like really bad. And I was scared that like if I got off or had an orgasm that I was going to like pee on him.

1:24:25 Caller Right.

1:24:26 Caller And like, I just like each time I've done, like I've only done three times. You shouldn't say only, but I've done it three times. And like each time it seems like weirder and weirder. And so I'm wondering, like, because I need like a translator for Nicole.

1:24:42 Adam All right. Listen, hey, Nicole, here's the deal.

1:24:44 Drew That what's the weird part? What's weird?

1:24:47 Caller Like every time I've done it, like I just totally concentrate on like what's going on, like me opening up wider, you know, like all these little things.

1:24:56 Adam All right. But look, all right. Okay. Hold on, Nicole, shut up.

1:25:01 Caller Shut up.

1:25:02 Adam Let me tell you what's going on. A couple of things. We do that to some people. Yes. You get baked and you start, you start obsessing and focusing on weird stuff. It's easy to do. I've done it. You get stoned and you, you think you're really tired and you're going to go pass out. You lie down in bed and just lie in there. And then you just hear like some cricket or something. And you just start zooming in on it. And before you know it, it's like, you're standing over at 70 foot long cricket. It's just, and it gets louder and louder. I mean, your mind can really, your mind can take stuff and run with it. And when you're stoned, you will do that or you can do that. So number one, you getting stoned and having sex at this stage is not a great plan. Right.

1:25:50 Drew Number two, you may in fact be getting more irritation each time you have sex. You may, the actual physical contact there can cause urinary tract infections. And so the irritation, the desire to pee, that kind of thing may actually be an infection. So you need to see a doctor about that right away.

1:26:04 Adam All right. So here's all our advice.

1:26:06 Drew And then you get birth control.

1:26:07 Adam 16, slow it down stoner. Stop smoking weed so much. Stop having sex so much. Stay away from these trouble making guys. Yes, get on some birth control if you're going to have sex. Evacuate your bladder before you get in on it.

1:26:23 Drew When you go to get seen about your urinary infection, get some birth control.

1:26:27 Adam All right. We'll be back.

1:26:31 Caller Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:26:50 Caller Hey, everybody, it's Loveline.

1:26:52 Adam I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew over there.

1:26:57 Caller Yeah.

1:26:57 Adam Well, I had a good one going, and then Anderson came in here, and producer Ann, and I thought, man, better save it now. I think I've reabsorbed it.

1:27:05 Drew Good time, I guess.

1:27:06 Adam Thank you. Yeah.

1:27:07 Drew Will you guys come in here and just sit through the show, please? Ann, just come here and sit down. Just, it's like a US. Marshal on an airplane.

1:27:14 Adam How dare you.

1:27:15 Caller Whatever.

1:27:16 Adam Rochelle?

1:27:19 Drew Rochelle?

1:27:19 Caller Hello.

1:27:20 Caller Hi.

1:27:20 Drew What's going on?

1:27:21 Caller Hi.

1:27:21 Caller Hey.

1:27:22 Caller Okay, I had a problem ever since I was little, like about four years old. I had worms. It was kind of like a leech in my vagina area.

1:27:36 Drew What the hell are you talking about?

1:27:39 Caller What?

1:27:39 Adam Yeah.

1:27:40 Drew Where did I help us understand?

1:27:42 Adam My sister had a leech in her vagina area, but it was a 21-year-old dude named Ray who was eating all the food in the house.

1:27:50 Drew Yeah.

1:27:51 Caller I wanted to know if this was like rare.

1:27:54 Adam No, it's fairly common.

1:27:56 Drew No. What do you mean? What are you talking about?

1:27:58 Adam Vaginal leech.

1:27:59 Caller No, it was just like little.

1:28:02 Drew Did you take it out?

1:28:03 Caller Hold on.

1:28:05 Adam Let's do a little reenactment there. I want to know if this is common. Yeah, it's common. Vaginal leech. No, it was little.

1:28:16 Drew Like a leech.

1:28:18 Adam Yeah. Most of the conversations we have in the show are really of the mad lib variety. Like, she answers a question that... She answers it in a way that you wouldn't know. I'd have to write my question down and then it would be funny. Oh, she hung up? Was she making it up or was she really high? Or what was that, Drew?

1:28:39 Drew She was impaired in some way. I have no idea why, but impaired.

1:28:43 Adam I don't think that was impaired Down syndrome. I think that was just kind of impaired.

1:28:49 Drew Out of itness, as you say.

1:28:50 Adam Yeah. I can't figure out whether that's a good way to go through life or a bad way. I think in a way it's a good way.

1:28:59 Caller Well, now I really don't.

1:29:03 Caller I'm really a hermit.

1:29:07 Drew A hermit.

1:29:14 Adam Phoenix?

1:29:15 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:29:16 I've got two questions if you don't mind.

1:29:18 Adam All right. You're 19.

1:29:20 Caller Yeah. Okay. I just got back from a two week vacation and my brother introduced me to this girl. I went down to visit my family. Anyways, we hit it off. We're damn near perfect for each other. The only thing is she's a pothead and I'm a two year recovered drugie, like big time. Anyways, for some reason, her mom doesn't like me at all. Yet she thinks I'm gay. I mean, almost everybody I come across thinks I'm gay.

1:29:55 Drew Why do they think that? How gay are you?

1:29:57 Adam He blows a lot of guys.

1:29:58 Drew The nipple rings?

1:30:00 Caller I can cook, I clean, I can do... My grandma taught me needlework and craft. I can sew.

1:30:08 Adam Alright, alright. Well, let's stop bragging about the sewing part.

1:30:12 Drew You're gay.

1:30:13 Adam Alright, so what's the real problem here?

1:30:18 Caller Well, one of the nice wives down there, she came over, she was high, and she sat down on my lap and started giving me this weird kind of lap dance.

1:30:27 Drew Who? Who?

1:30:30 Caller The girl.

1:30:34 Adam Anyways, I already had a hole in my butt. Alright, listen, I'm losing interest in this. What's the question?

1:30:40 Drew Bottom line.

1:30:41 Caller What do I need to do to get her mom to like me a little more?

1:30:45 Drew Let her hang out there more, get her to know you, have her know who you are. She may be afraid of you because you sort of remind her of a drug addict, which undoubtedly her husband was because that's where her girlfriend inherited that gene.

1:30:58 Adam Yeah, I want to knit her a tee cozy.

1:31:01 Drew And in fact, you know, I don't know.

1:31:03 Adam That's not good for a laugh at it, Drew.

1:31:05 Caller No.

1:31:05 Adam Just move right on.

1:31:06 Drew Yeah, tee cozy would be fine.

1:31:07 Adam Like knee to the needle point and knit her a tee cozy. I'll just keep moving on.

1:31:15 Caller Yeah, alright.

1:31:15 Adam Look, here's the deal. Drew, we do agree on this. Hang out and don't F up. And as the weeks turn into months and the months turn into years, eventually they'll like you.

1:31:25 Drew But she's got something about this guy, the mom.

1:31:28 Adam Right.

1:31:29 Drew And I wouldn't trust the mom to pick someone good for the daughter. You know what I'm saying? The fact that she doesn't like him is almost a good thing.

1:31:35 Adam Right.

1:31:36 Drew But she will eventually get to know you for who you are.

1:31:38 Adam David?

1:31:39 Caller Yeah.

1:31:39 Adam Yes, you're 19. I'm going to move through some calls here. Why didn't I become a pro boxer? I'm just too big a puss, really.

1:31:47 Caller Really?

1:31:47 Adam Yeah, but the skills were there.

1:31:49 Caller Right.

1:31:49 Adam Just that. It just didn't seem desperate enough.

1:31:54 Caller Right.

1:31:54 Adam I've been hit hard by guys who hit hard and it just didn't seem like a way to go.

1:31:58 Caller Yeah, I also have one more question real quick.

1:32:00 Drew It's a natural precursor to radio getting hit hard in the head.

1:32:03 Adam Yeah, yeah.

1:32:04 Caller I was wondering if you ever knocked anyone out in the ring.

1:32:06 Caller Yeah, yeah.

1:32:07 Caller Yeah?

1:32:07 Adam Yeah, I did that.

1:32:08 Caller How's that feel?

1:32:09 Adam It's kind of nice. Yeah. It was actually kickboxing I knocked a guy out.

1:32:14 Caller Wow.

1:32:14 Adam Yeah, heel kick right to the head. Yeah, it was good.

1:32:17 Drew How long was it down for?

1:32:19 Adam Well, not that long. It wasn't like unconscious. It just, you know, people get knocked out. They don't really get unconscious. I mean, their eyes are open to stuff. They're just they're just screwed up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I've been that way. I've done it a few times. It's nice. But, you know, when you're when you're sparring and stuff, you try to totally tee off on somebody. And sometimes it's accumulation of punches that does it for people.

1:32:40 Drew You're you're in a gallery wants to know what her name was.

1:32:43 Adam Oh, the chick I knocked down. Elderly black woman. I can't remember her name right now. She's in, you know, she had a lossy. She had she had her day. Yeah. She I mean, she was diabetic.

1:32:58 Drew Stephanie, Stephanie.

1:33:00 Adam Yeah. She had to have the one leg removed because she had, you know, wasn't, you know, but the prosthetic seemed to work fine.

1:33:06 Drew It hurt when she kicked for that. Stephanie.

1:33:09 Caller Yeah.

1:33:09 Adam 23. What's that?

1:33:11 Caller Well, you know, my friends and I were talking about one of my roommates and she's having sex with her boyfriend like all the time and I'm feeling kind of old and I'm only 23. And I guess I just don't want sex that much. Is that normal?

1:33:24 Drew How much do you want it?

1:33:25 Caller I'm sorry.

1:33:26 Drew How much do you want it?

1:33:27 Caller I don't know. Like once a week.

1:33:28 Drew I mean, maybe not just once a week is not abnormal, by the way.

1:33:31 Adam But the guy you're with may not be floating your boat.

1:33:35 Drew Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

1:33:35 Caller I mean, I've been listening for quite a while.

1:33:37 Adam Oh, well, then you have to be sexually charged.

1:33:41 Caller Yeah, I mean, I'm totally attracted to him.

1:33:43 Caller Even when I wasn't listening, it's not like I'd masturbate all the time.

1:33:46 Caller I wouldn't.

1:33:47 Caller It's not like I...

1:33:48 Adam Look, at 23, and women run a wide, wide range. Okay, so 23, that's fine. My guess is you'll be more into it at 33.

1:33:59 Drew Yeah, and that you'd be more into it with a different guy, but it may not be the right thing for you to be with a different guy. You understand, that might be the most important thing for her.

1:34:05 Caller Right.

1:34:07 Adam You just gotta believe that this guy was giving her the good oral action. She'd step it up to twice a week. But, still women, and that's the end of the no-sex time, 23 for women. By 26, 27, it starts to kick in a little bit. Okay, we'll take a break.

1:34:25 Caller Okay, so I know there's nothing wrong with me, so what's up?

1:34:28 Caller So I was like you, and I used to think that these datelines were totally cheesy.

1:34:31 Caller Why can't I meet anybody?

1:34:32 Caller But I tried everything else and thought, what the hell?

1:34:34 Caller So I called the dateline and actually met a cool guy.

1:34:36 Caller I called the dateline and I hooked up with some cool people.

1:34:38 Caller Believe it or not, other normal people are out there looking to...

1:34:40 Caller 877-889-DATE.

1:34:43 Caller Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:34:46 Drew We'll be right back.

1:35:22 Adam Well, there you have it, another evening done. Travis in here tomorrow night, and Tony Hawk in here on Wednesday night. And-

1:35:30 Drew Are you gonna bring in some sort of team to decontaminate this room?

1:35:33 Adam Bunch of other folks will be in. How dare you, Drew? Good guests lined up for the, not only this week, but upcoming weeks here on Loveline. So thanks for listening, and until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying, mahalo.

1:35:47 Caller I mean, almost everybody I come across thinks I'm gay.

1:35:50 Drew Why do they think that?

1:35:51 How gay are you?

1:35:52 Adam He blows a lot of guys.

1:35:54 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Sunday, October 21, 2001