Episode 1000754886920

1:02 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Voiceover Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew's a board-certified physician and addiction medicine specialist. Yes, Drew?

1:26 Drew I'm nothing. You just seem to have got a funny cadence tonight.

1:28 Adam Well, I was going to give the fax number, then I realized Westwood 1 owns a fax machine for which there's no paper manufactured anymore because it was probably bought in... I think it was bought at the World's Fair.

1:43 Drew Well, you know what they do have here though?

1:45 Adam 1908.

1:45 Drew No, no. Right. I just saw over here in the back office Morse code. So people can send us messages on Morse code if they wish.

1:52 Just be nice.

1:53 Adam All right. And there's a drop zone for carrier pigeon, I believe, on the roof too. All right. So I kid you not, even though fax machines are now $89, Westwood One does not own one that works because the paper, the tractor feed paper is no longer manufactured. Big bucks, everybody. Big companies, Westwood Two. Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. She is from Sex, Love, and Choices. This is an organization that reaches out to kids at school and beats them over the head about not having sex. And listen, I'm fine with that. I want people not to have sex.

2:36 Drew Well, that's been all of your point, is it?

2:37 Adam Yeah, everyone but me.

2:38 Drew Well, no, kids having kids, people having kids who shouldn't have kids.

2:42 Adam Yeah. I don't care about the venereal disease. That's fine with me.

2:46 Dina Tawfik Warts don't bother you, Adam?

2:47 Adam Even if it sterilizes them better, that's the way I look at it. I look at everyone as a rodent but me.

2:56 Drew Okay. I wish you were not speaking the truth.

2:59 Right.

3:00 Dina Tawfik But it's all reality.

3:01 Adam So now, where do you go? Do you go junior high? Do you go high school?

3:06 Dina Tawfik We mostly do high school presentations, assemblies, classrooms, Southern California based.

3:15 Drew Now, are these schools that already have abstinence only education that encourage you to come in or the schools that may or may not have federal funding based on abstinence only education?

3:25 Dina Tawfik There is no funding in California as far as the public schools go.

3:29 Drew So for abstinence only?

3:30 Dina Tawfik For abstinence only. There is funding for school-based clinics and other things along those lines. But as far as abstinence only, we really go in on private donations, scholarships. Schools have no cash for this stuff. I mean, they're basically herd, indirect, I can't quote verbatim, but Governor Davis said that abstinence only education is being taken care of in California, although we have one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the nation.

4:03 Drew I know there's a federal sort of statute that has, they give you matching funds if you educate as abstinence only, as the only alternative outside of marriage.

4:14 Dina Tawfik Right. It's a national grant called Title V. California, I believe right now is the only state that denied or wouldn't take any Title V funding. So we're straight, private funding.

4:27 Drew But absence only education is wonderful if it also includes how to deal with being abstinent. How to negotiate.

4:34 The lifestyle.

4:38 Drew Adam dealt with that for a long time.

4:40 Adam Here's an Atari game, sit home. What do you mean the lifestyle?

4:44 Caller Well there is the lifestyle.

4:46 Adam Doing nothing, please. I led that lifestyle.

4:49 Dina Tawfik That is so not true.

4:50 Adam That's no lifestyle.

4:52 Drew That's a death style.

4:53 Dina Tawfik It's a total lifestyle. You know the thing is I've heard, who is it, our former Surgeon General Jocelyn Elders talk about what her definition of abstinence.

5:03 Drew What was it?

5:04 Dina Tawfik Well it was during a congressional hearing and there was a list of about 30 things, the least offensive being, she entitled Outer Course, which is everything but inner course.

5:15 Drew And that's abstinence to her.

5:16 Dina Tawfik And that's abstinence to her. And the least offensive that I could probably mention being dry humping, taking showers together and mutual masturbation.

5:23 Drew That's all good. That's all good.

5:25 Dina Tawfik That's all good.

5:26 Drew That's all good abstinence right?

5:27 Dina Tawfik Not according to me.

5:29 Drew No I understand.

5:29 Dina Tawfik That is not abstinence.

5:30 Drew Because what's happened is.

5:31 Adam Jocelyn Elders was really on the vanguard of a lot of stuff. I think she will be appreciated more as the years wear off. Canned for talking about masturbation and dry humping. What a lady. What a build a statue to her.

5:46 Drew But to me that goes back to the fact that virginity has become sort of a technicality.

5:51 Dina Tawfik It is.

5:52 Drew Is abstinence chastity?

5:54 Dina Tawfik Well abstinence according, I would define abstinence as living a lifestyle of self-control, self-discipline.

6:01 Drew Doing what you want to do.

6:02 Dina Tawfik Delaying self-gratification. You know things that encompass a total lifestyle. It's not just about not having sex until you get married although I believe it's a large part.

6:13 Adam Shouldn't you basically just be preaching this toward the women and sort of head the penis off at the past? You know what I mean? Because if you can shut the women down then what good are the men? And the men are going to be a tougher audience too.

6:29 Dina Tawfik I actually totally agree with you because for the most part if the women aren't giving it up the men aren't getting it.

6:34 Drew How about Wendyshaleet and the Return to Modesty?

6:36 Dina Tawfik Yes. You know what? That has caused I think this revival of sorts among young women.

6:43 Drew So that book you think had a significant impact.

6:46 Dina Tawfik Absolutely. I mean it's not like many teen girls are picking it up at Barnes and Noble but I think that the attitude, that view is really beginning to get out. That I think for so long in the 60s and the 70s this generation is really dealing with the ramifications of what happened during the sexual revolution. I think people are just tired of it to tell you the truth.

7:07 Adam Well, I don't know if they're tired of it but maybe we've gotten used to it. But what about just addressing the women? Why not just have an assembly for women?

7:15 Dina Tawfik Well, I think it's the most effective. I do a lot of all-girl Catholic schools, believe it or not. It's interesting because I always thought the all-girl Catholic school reputation wasn't reality. But the most commonly asked question at all-girl Catholic schools is anal sex, oral sex. It's the loophole. It's how far can I go?

7:39 Drew It's the technicality. Those are the ones that call us about that.

7:42 Dina Tawfik That's right. And it's because they have this idea that all these other forms of outer course, quote unquote, is abstinence.

7:53 Adam And let me tell you what, it's really because.

7:55 Dina Tawfik What? Tell me.

7:55 Adam Most religion sucks. It's very confining. So people start looking for.

7:59 Dina Tawfik Trying to find the loophole.

8:01 Adam Ways around it. And it's sort of like in the 80s, if you were making several million dollars a year and paying half of it in taxes, you had to start finding ways not to pay so goddamn much. You had to start looking for loopholes and technicalities and work around it. And most people that are into religion and are also into getting laid, having a drink every once in a while, maybe coveting an oxen or two or killing somebody or something like that. They got to kind of work it out.

8:35 Drew The way it's the way some of it's done today. I don't want to, not any specific religions, but very often kids experience a certain amount of powerlessness and that results in a certain kind of sexual energy later.

8:44 Dina Tawfik Gearing towards. Well, I think too, it becomes the religious aspect becomes just that. It becomes religion and not a relationship. You know, an issue of personal accountability, which is really what we need to, that's the heart of, I think, abstinence is, have you gotten to a place in your own life where enough is enough, where the media message of, you know, sex, sex, sex. I mean, you, I cannot, I was just watching the whole series, finales, you know, on all the major networks, and there is no one there that isn't getting, that isn't getting any. I mean, everybody is getting some. And if you're not, then there is a major issue.

9:26 Drew You can say later on in the show.

9:28 Adam Thank you. She thinks she is talking to the Catholic girl. She is not ready for our audience.

9:34 Dina Tawfik I'll be safe.

9:35 Adam Well, look, obviously, sex sells. People are excited, and everyone is a voyeur to some extent. But I really just suggest pounding away on the women, scaring them.

9:46 Dina Tawfik We are. I think you're right. Not scaring them.

9:48 Drew Not scaring them. But not scaring them, because most of the abstinence-only education is done out there is sort of reefer madness education. And kids will cut down their activity for three months, and there's a rebound and an over.

9:58 Dina Tawfik There is. You're right.

9:59 Drew And so it's got to be very realistic in the context of what they're...

10:01 Dina Tawfik Yeah, and a day to day.

10:02 Adam All right. Let's go to the phones. We'll talk to Lindsay, who's 18. Lindsay?

10:06 Drew Hello?

10:07 Adam Hey.

10:08 Caller I'm going to make this short and simple. Does a guy ever ask a girl to go to King's Minion or out somewhere just as friends or is he always trying to get close to her or something?

10:19 Drew Adam?

10:21 Adam King's Minion?

10:23 Caller Yeah.

10:24 Adam Is that like a theme restaurant?

10:26 Caller What?

10:26 Drew Is that the Wharf at Baltimore?

10:29 Caller Yeah.

10:30 Drew It's a big, big development.

10:32 Adam Yeah. I mean, why would a guy ask a girl to go out at night?

10:35 No, no, no. Not at night.

10:36 Caller It's just like, is it like, would a guy ask a girl to go just like as friends or is he always trying to get close to her?

10:42 Adam No, he's trying to get close. How old is this guy?

10:45 He's 30.

10:46 Adam He's 30. And you're 18?

10:48 Caller Yeah.

10:49 Adam Yeah. He may rape you before you even get to the pier.

10:53 Drew Yeah. Yes.

10:54 Adam Who is this guy?

10:55 Caller My manager at work.

10:57 Drew Oh, my God. Oh, Lindsay, please. This is, hey, no, no, don't. Do not, please.

11:01 Caller You look 30, though.

11:02 Drew All right, Lindsay, what's right? Now we want to know what's the matter with you.

11:06 Caller With me?

11:07 Drew Yeah. If you don't have the judgment to understand, A, that this guy is behaving unethical, inappropriate, and probably ways that are specifically against the rules at your place of work, and that you would allow a predator like this to come into your life, where have you been victimized in the past?

11:23 Caller I haven't. I've had like a normal life.

11:25 Adam Well, she hasn't done it. She's calling. Where do you work?

11:28 Drew No, she doesn't even see it.

11:29 Caller I work at a children's toy store.

11:32 Adam I see. And what's he like in charge of? Cabbage Patch? Or is he the manager of the place?

11:38 Caller General manager.

11:39 Adam Okay. And you like this guy, right?

11:43 Caller Eh, I mean, I know he's dated younger girls.

11:46 Adam All right. But listen, you will become one of his victims.

11:52 Drew One of the heads who hangs on the wall.

11:54 Caller This guy could just be like, want to be friends.

11:56 Adam No way.

11:57 Drew No way.

11:58 Adam No way.

11:59 Drew He's risking his career.

12:00 Adam Yeah.

12:01 Drew He's doing something totally inappropriate.

12:02 Adam You know, it's funny and it's so sad. And I feel bad when I say this to women, but especially the ones under 20. I know you guys think you have a good personality. No, you don't. None of you. We don't want to talk to you about anything. Well, it's true, Drew. At age 30, did you want the companionship?

12:21 Drew Of a 19-year-old.

12:22 Adam Yes, you just wanted the exchange, the verbal exchange with an 18-year-old.

12:27 Drew I had finished residency, been practicing medicine for three years. Yeah, I would like nothing more to talk to than somebody who just got out of high school.

12:32 Adam Well, listen, I had half a junior college education. I still don't want to talk to women my own age, for Christ's sake.

12:38 Drew Well, that's just because they don't want to talk to you.

12:40 Adam I mean, present company excluded, of course. Thank you. This guy's an idiot. Don't go with him. It definitely means something. Angela?

12:49 Caller Yes?

12:50 Adam You're 22?

12:51 Caller Uh-huh.

12:51 Adam What's up?

12:53 Caller I just have a question. I really never had too much of a serious relationship, but when I meet like a guy, I always seem to want to be with them. And I don't know if that's like normal.

13:04 Drew You mean when you have sex with them the first time?

13:06 Caller Pardon me?

13:07 Drew What do you mean by be with them?

13:09 Caller Right. I have sex with them.

13:11 Caller Okay.

13:13 Dina Tawfik So you always want to have sex with the guy whenever you're with him.

13:17 Drew Whenever you go. First date.

13:18 Dina Tawfik First date.

13:19 Caller If I'm attracted to them. Right. Yes.

13:21 Dina Tawfik Right. So is there something specific? I mean are these guys just really attractive to you?

13:28 Caller I always think if I think they're cute, like it really doesn't matter.

13:32 Drew Angela, how often are you doing this?

13:34 Caller Pardon me?

13:34 Drew How often are you doing this?

13:36 Caller Actually not that often.

13:38 Drew How often is that?

13:42 Caller It's kind of weird. If I have like an opportunity to I'll do it like I'm kind of in a relationship now when that's kind of like happening, but I hadn't been in one for like at least a year.

13:53 Drew So once a year you do this?

13:55 Caller No, it's more than once a year, but it's like if it happens.

13:58 Adam But what relationship are you in now?

14:01 Caller Well actually it's this guy that I know from my work and like well I had just met him and I thought he was like really really cute and like things just like happened really fast and I don't...

14:13 Adam Are you in a relationship with him now?

14:16 Caller Well a sexual relationship and I think he wants more like because he told me he loved me and I mean I don't really love him.

14:23 Drew You're fat.

14:23 Adam Drew, please. Well you're not into him. Okay, so what's up with you that you can't be in an intimate relationship?

14:31 Caller I don't know.

14:32 Adam Where's daddy?

14:34 Caller Oh no, my dad. My parents are divorced. They have an okay marriage but...

14:39 Adam Yeah, your dad's a good guy. You love him?

14:43 Caller I love him, yeah. He was never really around when I was...

14:46 Adam All right, well there's something.

14:47 Drew Angela, people don't when they love someone they don't go, yeah, kind of. Yeah, he was, not really.

14:54 Adam Yeah, you never really connected with your dad, right?

14:57 Caller Right.

14:57 Adam So you're scared to connect with guys. So you just turn it into a sexual thing and even when the guy wants more than that, you don't commit to that.

15:06 Drew It's not so much you can't connect with guys, you've never been. That's who you are, that girl who's not connected to guys.

15:12 Adam So don't turn it into a sexual problem, it's an emotional thing. I mean, you know, you go to the therapist, read a book, take a walk.

15:19 Drew That or what you can do is try to delay the sexual relationship and see if it's going to be scary for you. You're not going to know what to do.

15:25 Caller But that's what it's like so hard because I was going to try to delay this one and it just didn't work.

15:29 Drew Well, the guys are going to oblige you every time. So you're the one that can have to hold the boundary and it's going to have to be uncomfortable. How would you suggest somebody to deal with it? Because this is a real emotional issue for her where if she doesn't have sex, it's a real relationship, it has real intimacy, real feelings that she's never experienced before.

15:45 Dina Tawfik Well, Angela, I would first suggest, I think you need to figure out what your goals are in this relationship is your goal to because if your goal continues to be what it is then you're going to continue on this track of getting with guys and you know having sex with them and then things don't work out and it's a cycle. And so the goal needs to have are you are you looking to be in an intimate long term relationship with somebody and if you are then sex is not the way to approach that initially.

16:18 Adam All right. I agree. And this is again not a sexual problem. Tammy. Yeah.

16:24 Drew That's actually the one thing she's got together.

16:26 Adam Yeah. Oh yeah.

16:29 Caller She's a problem.

16:30 Adam Tammy you're 13. You're on with Dina Tawfik. She is here from Sex, Love and Choices is an organization that goes from school to school and yells at chicks about having sex. Come on. It's called Spade and Spade. Tammy.

16:44 Caller Yeah.

16:44 Adam You're 13. What's up?

16:46 Caller Hey.

16:47 Caller I have an older boyfriend. How old?

16:51 Dina Tawfik How old is he?

16:52 Caller 15.

16:54 Drew And you're 13.

16:56 Caller Yeah.

16:57 Drew Right.

16:58 Caller Yeah.

16:58 Drew Yeah. Oh, dad just walked in.

17:02 Adam Yeah. Somebody walked in. Yeah. She wanted to. Well, geez, I don't know if we should say just in case the radio still on. Well, listen, Tammy, turn that radio down. She was nervous, nervous about giving her boyfriend a hand job.

17:17 Dina Tawfik Yeah.

17:18 Drew First hand job.

17:19 Adam First hand job.

17:19 Dina Tawfik Is she a virgin?

17:20 Drew Yeah.

17:21 Adam She's 13. Yeah. I'm hoping.

17:24 Dina Tawfik Okay. Tammy, stay away. Stay away from the penis? Well, not to mention there are a list of sexually transmitted diseases at this point that are all transmitted skin to skin or many of them. The most common, which we never ever hear about human papillomavirus, commonly known as warts.

17:43 Adam You can get warts from a handy?

17:45 Dina Tawfik Oh, yeah.

17:46 Adam Really?

17:46 Drew No, you can't.

17:47 Dina Tawfik Skin to skin. It's very rare.

17:49 Drew Very difficult.

17:50 Dina Tawfik It is.

17:50 Drew It is. But it's possible. It's almost impossible for the virus to penetrate the palms. You actually have to get it here if you're going to get it on the fingernail.

17:58 Dina Tawfik I agree. It's very difficult. But it is skin to skin transmission. I mean, we see pictures all the time.

18:04 Drew And you can get herpetic Whitlow and stuff too. But people, strangely, when they get these diseases on their hands, no big deal. They don't care about them.

18:11 Dina Tawfik Doesn't matter.

18:12 Drew It's just when they occur on their genitals.

18:13 Adam Well, look, you get a zit. Would you mind it on your palm or, you know, you want it on your palm or your nose? You know what I'm saying?

18:22 Drew Yeah.

18:22 Adam And we can handle it. I'd like a zit on my hand.

18:25 Drew Novelty. You had one. That big lump you had.

18:27 Adam I'd like a pair of goddamn pliers. Do I really go to town? How dare you call my sports related injury a zit? How dare you mock me that way?

18:38 Drew Remember what came out of it?

18:39 Adam I don't remember what came out of it. I had a big lump in the palm of my hand.

18:42 Drew Let's see how that looks now.

18:44 Adam Well, listen, I'll show you my hand, but do not handle it. You hurt me with your doctor's touch. It's numb.

18:52 Drew It's great.

18:53 Adam It's numb down there.

18:53 Drew There you go.

18:54 Adam It's caved in a little bit. As you can see, Drew's a bruise.

18:59 Drew Are you going to let me handle it?

19:02 Adam No, because it feels dead and I don't like the way it feels. It's a weird, it's like putting the tongue on the roof of your mouth.

19:09 Drew I ask my surgeon friend to have your hand match your soul.

19:13 Dina Tawfik Wait, so real quick to Tammy again, not to mention, no hand jobs, all the emotional, I believe, ramifications of any sort of sexual involvement are present when you do stuff like that. I mean, that's intimate stuff.

19:27 Drew But so again, so the point really is that there's an advantage to modesty and chastity.

19:31 Dina Tawfik I mean, it's beyond an advantage. What's the worst that can happen?

19:34 Adam Well, and it's also a slippery slope because if you're giving handies at 13, you're giving the world a year later.

19:41 Dina Tawfik A year, six months tops.

19:43 Adam A handie is what they call in the drug world.

19:45 Drew The entry level.

19:46 Adam Yes, the stepping stone.

19:47 Drew Well, the gateway.

19:48 Adam The gateway maneuver.

19:49 Dina Tawfik The gateway, like marijuana.

19:51 Adam You're not going to give a guy a handie at 13 and still be handing out handies at 19. You will have evolved.

19:57 Dina Tawfik There is a progression.

19:58 Adam I agree. Absolutely.

19:59 Dina Tawfik Which is why we, which is why I think it's so important for 13 especially. I don't know, something goes down at 13, Dr. Drew.

20:06 Adam Plot mitzvah. Did you have one of those?

20:10 Dina Tawfik No, I didn't.

20:11 Caller Thank God.

20:14 Dina Tawfik So, it's important that we really start being aware of what's going on with our teens.

20:20 Caller Oh, yeah.

20:21 Adam We got to take ourselves a little break. Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. She is with an organization called Sex, Love, and Choices. Hey, Dina, do you want to give a website or phone number or something else?

20:33 Dina Tawfik Yeah, phone number to get one of our presentations into schools is 562-398-6106.

20:42 Adam And you...

20:43 Dina Tawfik I'm sorry, 626. Not 562.

20:46 Adam Well, give the whole thing again.

20:47 Dina Tawfik It's 626-398-6106.

20:50 Adam And you guys go to the school and do assemblies.

20:53 Dina Tawfik That's right. Assemblies, classroom presentations.

20:55 Adam I'll tell you that I loved an assembly when I was in school. Anything to get up and walk somewhere other than the cooler, which was the classroom. And you know, the only... I really got screwed scholastically. I had one field trip... No, two field trips and one assembly in my entire school. One field trip, as you know, was to Laurie's, the seasoning plant.

21:20 Dina Tawfik Oh, went there.

21:21 Adam In God damn Eagle Rock or wherever the hell that dump is. Nothing less exciting...

21:26 Dina Tawfik Pasadena...

21:27 Adam .to a twelve year old than seeing where the taco seasoning is manufactured. And actually getting a packet of taco seasoning to take with... Do you realize how worthless that is to a twelve, thirteen year old kid? Yes, taco... I think I still have that God damn thing in my wallet. Oh... Useless. Yeah, even Huel Hauser probably turned down the L'Arri people, said it wasn't fascinating enough. And this is a guy that does two hours on churros. The second one I went to was Alvera Street, which is... anyone who lives in the Los Angeles area, this is just basically the big cop out when it comes to field trips. It's close by, it's technically somewhere else, but let me tell you something, all of Los Angeles is Alvera Street. Alvera Street is everywhere now. It's a bunch of Mexicans selling marionette, and again you could capitalize on a churro or maybe a soft taco or something. That was worthless. And the one school assembly I had, LeBeau from Hogan's Heroes, the French guy, he came in and talked about the Holocaust. Talk about...

22:33 Dina Tawfik Life changing?

22:33 Adam Yeah. I'm sitting there at 17 going, Jesus Christ, let's go back to Lorry's. All right. I was about ready to climb into the oven after about 10 minutes of LeBeau going on about the Holocaust. Well, these are wonderful stories. Thank you, dickhead. We'll take ourselves a break. We'll be right back.

22:52 Hello, this is your radio.

23:28 Adam Hey, there you go, everybody. It's Loveline. I like this song. Who is this man? We must know this guy. Oh, yeah. Some 41. That's right. Good guys. Oh, yeah. They'll be on June 21st.

23:45 Yeah.

23:46 Adam Good guys. Good guys.

23:47 Good times.

23:48 Adam Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. She is from Sex, Love, and Choices. This is a organization that is pro abstinence. It goes to schools, talks to kids about holding off until after they tie the knot. I agree with her. I know it's totally unrealistic.

24:07 Dina Tawfik Wow.

24:07 Adam But I totally agree.

24:08 Dina Tawfik Why is it unrealistic? Well, it's just not- Tell me why.

24:12 Adam Well, I'll tell you why. I mean, here's-

24:14 Dina Tawfik Because the reality is I'm abstinent.

24:17 Adam Yeah.

24:18 Dina Tawfik And waiting until I get married.

24:20 Adam Are you?

24:20 Dina Tawfik And it's completely realistic for me. Because I don't get myself- I try not to get myself in situations where it doesn't become unrealistic.

24:29 Adam Right. Like trapped in a small room with a couple of very striking young men who do radio. Drew's missing that whole angle there.

24:39 Drew I got it.

24:39 Adam He attracted either one of us at all?

24:42 Dina Tawfik I couldn't even say it on the air.

24:44 Adam Drew. Yeah. Your mom wants you to marry a doctor. All right. So wait a minute. Here's why it's unrealistic. And here's what I've learned from this show. The people you got to worry about most are the people who are almost, it's almost a biological mandate that they have sex. These are the young girls whose daddy wasn't around, whose daddy may have drank, whose daddy may have beat on them or who may have been sexually abused, who did not have any kind of male guidance in their life. So all men become daddy. And stopping a woman like that at 14 or 15 year old, at 14 or 15 years age is just damn near impossible.

25:30 Dina Tawfik But see, I think that's assuming, that's assuming that that's the way it's got to be. I mean really because if there's a biological mandate for that, then there should be a biological mandate for rape and for all kinds of other things that we don't want people to get into, but they end up getting into. So I think that's a cop out.

25:50 Drew We would say that there is, and that's why you have to create these very, very powerful laws that prevent them from doing it.

25:54 Dina Tawfik Right.

25:54 Drew Otherwise they'll do it, because there is a very powerful biological mandate. So the only way you can stop the women is with some other sort of extremely powerful countervailing force.

26:03 Dina Tawfik But there is, what about the note of personal responsibility, you guys? I mean.

26:08 Adam Oh, listen, that's all great. Why don't we just go into the prisons of the world and explain to the guys when they're paroled that they need to be accountable and that they can no longer commit crimes. But the problem is, is they're not going to listen to that, because they're effed up on a level that doesn't permit that kind of influence to get to them.

26:29 Dina Tawfik Now. I think you're right. I think to a certain extent, we got to kind of cut, believe that the reality is that not everybody is going to be, not everybody that hears the message in these schools is going to be a master.

26:41 Drew I think you got to have like, the people that are screwed up and are sexually compulsive. I don't mean bad, they've got issues, and that makes them that way. Shouldn't be glorified as merely liberated. I mean, the Kim control character on Sex and the City. Yeah, she's a mess. And you hear people say, oh, she's a liberated, just expressing her sexuality. This is a very, very disturbed woman.

27:05 Dina Tawfik Well, we got to find a way to justify it. If we don't do that, it's not justifiable.

27:09 Adam Well, we should call her Captain McSlutty or something like that. We should change her character's name too.

27:15 Dina Tawfik How about not having her character at all?

27:18 Drew Well, how about having her character but looking at it realistically, at the pain of somebody who's actually engaging in those kinds of behaviors. Not glorify that as something that should be normative.

27:26 Adam All right. Bob?

27:28 Yeah.

27:28 Adam You're 35.

27:29 Caller How's it going?

27:30 Adam What's up?

27:30 Caller Love the show. Thanks. My question is for Dr. Drew. I got herpes, the wife and I, ex-wife, we got herpes like seven years ago.

27:40 Drew How did you simultaneously contract it?

27:43 Caller Drunken Nights. We kind of got to, it was with, like she was, we were, you know, went home with a couple people.

27:52 Adam A little swinging.

27:54 Caller Yeah, kind of.

27:55 Drew Wow.

27:55 Caller And had oral sex. I was with the girl, she was with a guy, and then we split up and then.

28:03 Drew You know, relationships can not handle this kind of thing. Well, you know that, they're divorced. But wouldn't it be great if we lived in a world where it could, where it would work?

28:10 Adam Yeah, but then it wouldn't be enticing anymore. We wouldn't be interested in it.

28:15 Caller Well, that was way before we were married.

28:18 Drew Yeah, but relationships can't handle this kind of thing. I'm married or unmarried.

28:21 Adam All right, well, let's not beat the guy up.

28:23 Drew All right, so what's the question?

28:24 Caller Well, so we got herpes. I get a breakout, you know, every couple months. Mostly where I get my breakout is on my ear. And lately, when I get on my ear, it's like.

28:37 Drew Painful.

28:38 Caller Yeah, but usually I can like stop the breakout, you know, with the acyclovir, right? You know, feel that little tangle, start popping the pills. And it usually doesn't happen. But lately, when it happens, like my gland right below my ear gets really swollen. Is that normal? Yep. All right.

28:58 Adam What did the guy, did the guy get you in the ear? I mean, he used your ear and, you know, you know what I'm saying?

29:05 Caller No, I didn't.

29:06 Adam He didn't ear.

29:07 Caller I was having oral sex with the girl. The ex was with the guy. And then...

29:13 Adam Oh, the ear. Are you still married? No, no. You're good.

29:16 Caller Ex. You know, it's been separated for a year.

29:20 Adam Good. You got any kids?

29:23 Caller Very great. Wonderful son. Yeah. He's great.

29:29 Caller All right.

29:29 Adam How old is he?

29:30 Caller He's four.

29:31 Caller All right.

29:32 Adam Who has custody of him?

29:33 Caller It's 50-50.

29:34 Adam Okay.

29:35 Drew Yeah.

29:35 Caller That's working out really well.

29:37 Adam All right. So, Drew, what should he do?

29:39 Drew Nothing. He hasn't asked a question yet. He hasn't asked his question yet.

29:43 Adam All right. What's your question?

29:45 Caller If I do get into another relationship, am I contagious like 24-7?

29:51 Drew From the ear, possibly.

29:53 Caller Okay. But...

29:54 Drew The question is whether or not some... Do you ever get anything on your tongue or anywhere else, mouth?

29:59 Caller You know, on the penis every... You know, more so on my ear than...

30:04 Drew That's interesting. That's interesting.

30:05 Caller Why in the ear, Dr. Drew?

30:07 Drew You can get it anywhere. I mean, the most devastating herpes infection is in the eye. And usually, though, when you've had it in one place, you don't inoculate other places. It's difficult to get it in two places simultaneously. But he was lucky enough to get it. And, yeah, the penis could be always contagious, though certainly very contagious if you have symptoms and maybe not contagious when you don't have symptoms.

30:27 Adam All right. There. See, one more good reason not to have sex, everyone. Joe?

30:32 Dina Tawfik Herpes in the ear.

30:34 Adam You're 18.

30:35 Caller Yeah.

30:35 Adam What's up?

30:37 Caller Well, I am not circumcised.

30:39 Caller And I would just like to... There's this girl I really care about, right? And I want to go farther with her in the relationship.

30:46 Adam Right.

30:46 Caller Not have sex. I'm going to wait until I'm married.

30:49 Adam Right. But you might want to let her sniff your penis?

30:51 Caller Yeah. Well, you know, do other stuff.

30:54 Adam Right. Right. Oh, yeah.

30:55 Caller And I just want to know, do girls get freaked out by that or...?

30:59 Drew By lack of circumcision?

31:00 Caller Yeah.

31:01 Adam Uh, I think it was something that they got freaked out more about in the past. I think... I don't know what percentage of 18-year-olds are circumcised these days, Drew?

31:13 Drew I don't know.

31:13 Adam Well, okay. But you know how we're both geniuses?

31:17 Drew Yeah, less than before.

31:19 Adam Would you say... Okay, let's put it this way. Um, 20 years ago, 90% of... 95% were circumcised. 10 years ago, I'd say it'd be 70.

31:32 Drew Yeah. 80, 90, 85% probably.

31:34 Adam It's still that high.

31:35 Drew I think it's about 70 now.

31:37 Adam Yeah, of 18-year-olds?

31:38 Drew Yeah.

31:39 Caller Yeah. 65, 70?

31:41 Drew Yeah, yeah.

31:41 Adam All right. Has she been with a man before?

31:44 Caller Yes, she has.

31:45 Adam All right. Maybe she got one that wasn't circumcised.

31:48 Caller I don't like those chances.

31:52 Dina Tawfik I think the real issue here... Is it Joe?

31:54 Adam Yeah.

31:54 Dina Tawfik Is that right? Joe, why even endeavor in any sort of sexual stuff with her? I mean, you care about her?

32:04 Caller Yeah, I do.

32:05 Dina Tawfik Okay. So you're saying that, you know, in the future, you'd see yourself marrying a girl like this?

32:11 Caller Yeah, like, if she wants to go farther in this relationship, and I don't want to hold that back just because, I mean, I'm not going to have sex with her.

32:20 Dina Tawfik So she's pushing the issue?

32:21 Caller Yeah.

32:22 Adam How old is she?

32:23 Caller She's 17.

32:24 Adam Uh-huh. Uh, listen, just... Okay, so clean yourself up real nice. Do what I do. I take a balloon, I fill it with rubbing alcohol, and then I pull it over my penis and tie it off with a sandwich tie. At night. Oh, nice. It keeps my penis moist and sterile. Just clean yourself up and have at it. She's not gonna care.

32:48 Dina Tawfik No, how about just not endeavoring in that? Try that too.

32:50 Adam Clean yourself up and don't have sex.

32:52 Dina Tawfik That's right.

32:53 Adam That's right.

32:53 Caller Does that affect longevity in terms of...

32:56 Dina Tawfik Relationships?

32:57 Caller No, I mean...

32:58 Drew Sustaining the erection? No.

33:00 Adam No.

33:01 Drew You gotta think like a man here for a second.

33:03 Caller All right.

33:03 Drew Yeah.

33:04 Adam You're fine there, Joe.

33:05 Caller I have one comment for you guys. You guys do the best work of any two human beings in the face of the earth. You guys...

33:10 Drew Imagine that. Sister Teresa?

33:12 Adam That's right.

33:12 Drew We got nothing on us.

33:13 Adam Thank you.

33:14 Drew Hey, thanks a lot. All right, Joe.

33:15 Adam Take care, Joe. Let's talk to Kate. Kate is 16. Kate?

33:22 Caller Hey.

33:22 Adam What's up?

33:23 Caller First off, I just wanted to say, are you guys gonna possibly be on a radio station in Philadelphia anytime?

33:29 Drew Kate, I have been... How are you listening to us now?

33:33 Caller Well, I go to school in Connecticut.

33:36 Drew I have been pressuring for that for quite some time. It is bizarre to me that we're not on Philadelphia. That is a natural market. I think it will happen soon.

33:42 Caller Everybody wants it.

33:43 Caller All my friends are going to want it.

33:44 Drew Well, it's bizarre that we're not on. It's the only major market we're not on.

33:48 Caller Yeah.

33:48 Drew Yeah, it's bizarre.

33:49 Caller All right.

33:49 Adam Were we never on in Philadelphia?

33:51 Drew Never. And there's all kinds of weird energy about it.

33:54 Caller Really?

33:54 Drew Yeah. I apparently remember that show with... What was that show? Love Phone or something?

33:58 Caller Right.

33:59 Drew I mean, that was a show promoting these kinds of behaviors as opposed to looking at them realistically.

34:03 Caller Yeah.

34:04 Drew And it got a really negative...

34:06 Adam Yeah. My roots are in Philadelphia.

34:08 Drew So are mine. I'm also from Philadelphia.

34:10 Adam I grew up... I shouldn't say grew up there, but spent quite a few years there as a youth. And my dad grew up there and was raised there. All right, Kate. What's up?

34:19 Caller Okay.

34:20 Drew Where do you go in Connecticut?

34:21 Caller What?

34:21 Drew Where do you go in Connecticut?

34:23 Caller Boarding school.

34:24 Drew Okay.

34:24 Caller Yeah. Anyway.

34:26 Caller Okay.

34:27 Caller I was thinking about having sex with a pretty good friend of mine this summer. And I was just wondering if you thought it might be the wrong thing to do.

34:35 Caller Why?

34:36 Drew Who are you asking?

34:37 Adam Well, we'll all take a stab at it. Why a friend? I mean, why not a boyfriend?

34:43 Caller Okay, because like I go away to school and like he doesn't and like he's here in Philadelphia. And so like we don't want to like have a big relationship. But we did last summer and like we're going to this summer too.

34:58 Drew I see. So if you were living in Philadelphia, you would be, this would be your boyfriend.

35:01 Caller Oh, totally. Yeah.

35:02 Drew Okay. So you really like this guy.

35:04 Caller Oh my God. Yeah.

35:05 Drew Okay. That's not your best friend. This is a guy you were very romantically involved with. And why doesn't he want to try to maintain the relationship, you know, from Connecticut is not that far away. I mean, it's a train ride.

35:15 Caller Yeah.

35:16 Drew Why does he want to try to maintain that?

35:18 Caller Well, I mean, I think it's not just him. Like, just because, you know, I do not home every weekend, you know, and it's just.

35:25 Drew Here's what I think it is.

35:26 Adam Wait a minute. What did she say?

35:27 Drew I don't don't listen to it because it's nonsense.

35:30 Adam No, what does she say?

35:31 Drew She said she doesn't come home every weekend. I mean, she comes home plenty.

35:34 Caller Well, I don't come home a lot.

35:35 Drew Yeah, but you come home plenty to maintain a relationship.

35:37 Adam But when you're 16 and you're in love with a guy or in fact, he is not in love back, that's the problem here.

35:45 Drew Kate, that's the problem here because if he said to you, I want you my girlfriend, I love you, we'll make it work out, tell me you wouldn't do that in a heartbeat. But he's like that. No, but he's not your best friend. You're romantically involved with him. If you have sex with him, you're going to get bonded with him in a way that's going to be extremely painful for you because he doesn't have the same romantic interest in you. In terms of what he feels about you, you're a friend and he'll accept the sex, Kate. He'll accept it. No problem. But that's not because he's in love right now.

36:18 Dina Tawfik That's right because it will be friends with benefits, isn't that right?

36:22 Caller Like I want to go out with him for the summer.

36:24 Drew Well that's fine. Then why don't you first make it clear that you want him to be a boyfriend? Why don't you establish that? And if that's starting to work out, then fine. Whatever you want to do.

36:33 Adam Kate, how old is he?

36:34 Caller He's 16 too.

36:35 Adam And does he know the way you feel about him?

36:39 Caller Yeah.

36:40 Drew Does he really?

36:41 Caller Yeah, he does.

36:41 Adam And what's his response to that?

36:43 Caller He doesn't completely know. I mean, he's sort of...

36:46 Drew Kate, you must make it very clear to him. And whatever he does in response, you've got to be honest with yourself about.

36:52 Adam And why isn't he in on this? I mean, yes, I agree with Drew.

36:56 Caller But how do I make it completely clear? What if he's like, I'm sure he's like, I don't know, you know, you're afraid of what he's going to say back.

37:04 Drew That's why you can't make it completely clear. And if if he says back, I'm not up for that, you have to accept that because that's what you're dealing with.

37:11 Adam I think she has the feeling he's not up for it.

37:13 Drew Of course, that's what she's feeling.

37:14 Caller Hey, it's just like I'm negative, you know, like I'm always negative.

37:18 Adam Why do people bother calling this show? It's so painful.

37:20 Dina Tawfik Kate, let me ask you a question.

37:22 Adam Are you now the final nail in the sex coffin?

37:25 Dina Tawfik Do you are you do you want to have sex with them so you can keep this relationship? Are you sure? Is it sounding like that a little bit?

37:33 Caller I really don't think like that would like, I don't know, like I think I'm going to go out like no matter what.

37:38 Adam All right. Why are you going to boarding school?

37:42 Caller Like a good boarding school. It's not like a bad people boarding school.

37:44 Caller It's like a good boarding school.

37:46 Adam Are your parents busy? They're attorneys?

37:49 Caller No, there's nothing to do with that.

37:50 It's where smart kids go.

37:53 Caller You get into really good colleges.

37:54 Caller All right.

37:56 Adam For a smart kid, you can't stop messing with that goddamn phone.

37:59 Caller What are you talking to him?

38:00 Caller That's my friend on the phone.

38:02 Drew Your friend on the phone?

38:03 Caller Yeah. You see her a lot like the guys, too.

38:06 Adam Okay. Let me explain something when you're listening in on a call. The idea is to do it in a stealth type manner, not to be known. Not to be rattling.

38:16 Drew It's like Get Smart here.

38:17 Adam Driving in a 16-penny nail with the phone receiver, and distracting the people you're speaking to, to the point where they say, what is that? Yeah, just tell her to sit still.

38:30 Drew All right.

38:30 Adam Is your friend there? Let me talk to your friend for a second. What's her name?

38:34 Caller Um, Liz.

38:36 Caller Talk. Talk. Hello.

38:38 Adam Hello.

38:39 Caller Hi.

38:40 Adam Are you Cade's friend?

38:41 Caller Yeah.

38:42 Adam Now, does she have it bad for this guy or what?

38:44 Caller Yeah, she really does.

38:45 Adam She really does.

38:46 Drew And he's not quite as into it as much, is he?

38:48 Caller Well, no. I think he is because I was talking to him last night, and he sounded like he was. Be quiet.

38:52 Drew Kate.

38:54 Dina Tawfik Kate's trying to shut her.

38:55 Drew No, there's a bunch of them there.

38:56 Caller It's really late.

38:57 Drew Kate. Kate. Kate's friend. What's your name? Les? Leslie? Liz. Liz. Liz. Listen, make Kate see reality. If this guy, make it clear to him that you want to be the boyfriend and the girlfriend. If he's not up for that, listen to that. He's being honest. Guys are not persuaded by anything. Not by sex especially.

39:17 Dina Tawfik That's right. And this is the type of relationship, as soon as our friend Kate gives it up, it's the relationship sounds like it's not going to last for too much longer.

39:26 Adam Naming your kid Liz in Connecticut is a big mistake because they pronounce it Lez. You know, she said it a few times.

39:34 Drew You're a lesbian.

39:35 Adam Yeah. This is, what's your name? Is it, we couldn't make it out and she was like, it's a, no, no, it's a Lez. Lez. It's like, what, your grandmother was a lesbian and there's some sort of a mind. No, no, no, you know, like, Elizabeth.

39:50 Drew Team.

39:51 Adam Team. All right, let's take ourselves a break.

39:53 Drew We'll be back.

39:58 Um, back in a minute.

40:26 Adam It is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That's Dr. Drew. Over there, everybody. I'm real excited that Brooke Burke is coming on here at the end of the week, the super attractive woman from Wild On, whatever that E! show is. And let me tell you, I've said it many a time and remind me to say to Brooke when she comes around, more pornography on E! than any other goddamn channel on cable. I do the man show, I get a certain amount of crap for putting the chicks on the trampolines at the end of the show. There's other stations that get a certain amount of, MTV always is used as sort of the whipping boy for the sexuality and the chicks gyrating in the bikinis. Turn on E! anytime, anytime, and you will see just, it's the thong back channel.

41:20 Dina Tawfik What does E! stand for again?

41:21 Adam Entertainment, and basically what it is, is because things fall under the veil of entertainment, like we're going down to Cannes to take a look at the film festival, well they just go right to the beach and film porn stars the whole time, but it's some sort of newsworthy story that they're doing over there, it's all TNA, and I'm happy for them, I just want to know how they're getting away with it. No one ever says anything. Their whole thing is, yeah we're going on the set of a porn film, we're going into a hot tub with porn stars, it's nothing but thong back ass, there's more tiled out boobs on that show, more blurred boobs, pixelated boobs, it's amazing, and nobody complains about it, they never go, you know, the problem with the decay in society and the rampant sexuality is the e-channel, you know, it's always MTV or Playboy or Hustler or Comedy Central or something.

42:21 Dina Tawfik They're just still.

42:22 Adam Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight, she is one of the folks from Sex, Love and Choices, is a group that preaches abstinence to younger people, and we agree. Nicole, good luck, but we agree. You're 16, what's up?

42:41 Caller I just had a question because I'm messing around with this one guy, and he asked me if I ever considered having anal sex, and I kind of am now, and I just wanted to know how to prepare.

42:51 Drew Hey, hey, hey, answer. Just slow down here. What was the opening volle here? You wanted to, what?

42:57 Caller I had a question about anal sex.

42:59 Drew Yeah, what was the question?

43:00 Caller How do you prepare?

43:02 Drew And yet you're already doing it.

43:04 Caller No, I'm not already doing it, because I'm just considering it.

43:08 Drew You're considering it.

43:08 Adam Personally, how do I prepare for anal sex?

43:11 Dina Tawfik How do you prepare?

43:12 Adam You guys ever see the beginning of Kung Fu? Remember the show? I take that red hot thing and I put my wrists up against it, and then I snatch the pebbles. And a lot of work with a bamboo stick and walk on rice paper.

43:26 Drew And there is that book by Stanislavski too.

43:29 Adam What's that? Preparing for anal sex? Anal sex in you?

43:35 Caller Lots of doctor PhDs have been written on it.

43:38 Adam Nicole, how old is this guy?

43:44 Dina Tawfik Nicole, have you had sex yet with him?

43:46 Caller No.

43:47 Dina Tawfik So he wants your first run to be anal sex?

43:51 Caller Yeah.

43:51 Drew Why?

43:52 Caller I don't know. I don't know. He's the kind of guy who messes around but not having sex a lot.

43:59 Drew Do we gamble on Nicole?

44:00 Caller What?

44:01 Adam No.

44:02 Drew I don't know.

44:02 Adam Nicole, what's wrong with you? We don't have time for this. What's up? What happened to you? Where's your dad?

44:08 Caller Downstairs.

44:09 Adam Downstairs in hell?

44:11 Caller No. He's in the house.

44:12 Adam I see.

44:13 Caller Part of my life, yeah.

44:15 Adam Yeah. What's up? That you're dating a twenty-four year old guy who wants anal sex?

44:20 Caller I'm not dating him. I'm just...

44:21 Adam Well, worse then. What are you doing? I mean, you're seriously considering having anal sex with this twenty-four year old?

44:29 Caller I wasn't before, but then, I don't know.

44:31 Drew Adam, get back down the line of questioning about what's the matter with her because there's something definitely up there.

44:36 Adam What's your dad do for a living?

44:38 Caller He's in computers.

44:39 Drew No, neighbor got her. Something like that.

44:41 Adam Any... anything happen? Are you a virgin?

44:44 Caller Yeah.

44:45 Adam You are? What happened? Something?

44:47 Caller Nothing.

44:48 Adam Molested by a babysitter?

44:50 Caller No, not that I can remember.

44:52 Adam Stepbrother?

44:53 Caller No.

44:54 Adam Neighbor?

44:55 Caller No.

44:56 Adam Jehovah's Witness?

44:57 Caller No.

44:57 Adam Came to the door? No. Never... nothing? No beating? Dad an alcoholic?

45:03 Caller No.

45:04 Drew Wait a minute. No one ever touched you or sexually molested you, anything like that?

45:09 Caller Not that I can remember. Maybe like they said something but then nothing ever physical.

45:13 Drew Did anybody ever suspect something like that happen to you?

45:17 Caller I don't think so.

45:18 Drew Have you had sex before or had any kind of intense physical relationships with anyone?

45:23 Caller Yeah.

45:24 Drew And how old were you when that all started?

45:26 Caller Just 14, 15.

45:28 Drew And how old was that guy when you were 14?

45:31 Caller It's the same guy.

45:33 Adam Same guy?

45:33 Drew Is this like a family member or something?

45:37 Caller Not family member but like friend of the family.

45:42 Adam Well, let's be fair to the guy. He was 22 at the time.

45:45 Drew When she was 12.

45:47 Adam It's not like he was 24.

45:49 Drew I bet when you were about 10 he started working on you, didn't he?

45:52 Caller I don't know. I don't remember.

45:53 Drew Why don't you remember being 10?

45:55 Caller I mean, I don't remember him that much.

45:58 Adam Okay, so this guy is a friend of the family?

46:01 Caller Yeah, but I didn't see him too often.

46:03 Drew But he abused you when you were 14. He raped you.

46:06 Caller I don't have anything like that. It's just like flirting and then I got like more on the sexual side when I was 15.

46:15 Drew When he was 21.

46:17 Adam No, when he was 23.

46:18 Drew 23, yeah.

46:19 Adam Jesus Christ. Hey, Nicole. This guy is a real bad guy. Do you know that?

46:25 Drew He's a criminal. You understand that?

46:27 Caller Yeah.

46:29 Adam You shouldn't be entertaining doing anything with this guy except for calling the cops.

46:33 Caller But it's not that I don't like it though.

46:36 Dina Tawfik Nicole, let me say something to you. I mean, I think what they're trying to get at, anal sex is never, from any woman I've ever spoken to who's experienced this, this is not a pleasure-filled experience. Are you hearing what I'm saying?

46:53 Drew We actually have talked to him. They claim that we gotta go to break.

46:56 Adam Hold on, we go back to her. No, we're not. Nicole, this guy's a criminal. I don't know what's going on with you, but you stay away from him.

47:03 Drew Period. I don't care what he wants to do to you, stay away from him.

47:05 Adam I don't even want you to put your anus on a stick, a ten-foot stick and put it near him, if that's possible. Alright, we'll take a break. Yep, Loveline, everybody. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. She is from Sex, Love and Choices. This is an organization that goes around to schools and other places, right? Right. Churches. And you don't need to go there.

48:18 Caller Stop.

48:19 Dina Tawfik Oh, let me tell you, I think sometimes we need to go there more than we need to go to the schools. But you know, you guys, I realize that if abstinence really takes off, you all might be out of a job.

48:28 Caller That's fine.

48:29 Drew We'll do something else.

48:32 Adam Yeah, I'm looking for that out of a job thing. We still get paid though, right?

48:37 Caller Yeah.

48:37 Adam All right. That's fine. All right. Let's talk to Kevin, who's 24. Kevin?

48:46 Caller Oh, hi Adam.

48:47 Adam Hey.

48:47 Caller Hi Dr. Drew. Big fan of the show. Thanks. I have a question for Dina. I have a bachelor's degree in sociology and psychology, and I was considering maybe going back to get my teacher's certificate. If there was room in a high school curriculum for maybe teaching social responsible behavior for a whole semester, or I have an interest in education, but I didn't know if maybe, like if there's any room in the high school curriculum for that.

49:21 Dina Tawfik Well, where are you from?

49:24 Caller Covington, Kentucky.

49:26 Dina Tawfik Well, I actually was out in Kentucky last year, and let me tell you, if there's room anywhere, there's room in Kentucky curriculum. So-

49:33 Drew Why's that?

49:34 Dina Tawfik I just think the South is much more receptive to this message, Dr. Drew.

49:39 Adam But I hate to cut you off.

49:41 Dina Tawfik No, it's okay.

49:41 Adam Really, I don't mind.

49:43 Dina Tawfik I know you don't.

49:46 Adam Is the deal that if you preach abstinence, it's considered a religious message?

49:52 Dina Tawfik I think that's how we've been token. Now, let me just be totally real and tell you all that for me, personally, it's because I have a relationship with God and because abstinence sort of came out of that for me. But, and I think for some reason, we've been all grouped into that sort of arena. But the reality is that abstinence is working regardless of religious affiliation.

50:23 Adam Do you have a relationship with God or Jesus Christ?

50:27 Dina Tawfik I have a relationship with Jesus Christ.

50:29 Adam Do you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ?

50:31 Dina Tawfik Opposed to a corporate relationship?

50:33 Adam Well, people talk about having a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, but they don't have a personal relationship with God as much. Is that because he's higher up the ladder?

50:41 Dina Tawfik Well, Jesus Christ, man, God, okay, so we're all there. Now, to answer your question, I'm sorry, what was his name? Kevin. To answer your question, yes. I've seen lots of classes where they've called them life skill classes.

50:59 Drew Again, my understanding is that a lot of schools are resistant to giving life skills, and they're big on sort of abstinence scare messages, like if you were going to die if you have sex, that's sort of the approach.

51:10 Dina Tawfik Well, people ask me all the time, are we a fear-based organization? Heck yeah, we're a fear. I mean, there is a genuine, healthy fear to having sex outside of a monogamous marriage. Yes, so there's, now am I scaring them out of having sex? No, I think I'm, I relay personal experiences and realistic consequences to having sex.

51:34 Drew If there's something to be afraid of, shouldn't you be preaching or discussing the fact that the emotional consequences are very likely to occur?

51:42 Dina Tawfik To great, great detail. I actually think that the truth is that in dealing with, especially teen girls, I find that the best way to deal with it is to discuss the emotional consequences.

51:55 Adam Hey, hey, Kevin? Yeah. I'd like you to do me a favor. Sure. Once you get that teaching credential and you get in the Kentucky school system there, I would like to see a class at every high school called, So, You're Not Going To College. Basically, which is this? Here's how to fill out an application, you know, at a fast food place. Here's how to balance a checkbook. Here's how not to get your girlfriend knocked up. Here's how to possibly beat a moving violation, you know, when the cop pulls you over. He should have you come in as a guest. Oh my God.

52:35 Caller They'll get most of that stuff on their way out of jail.

52:37 Adam Yeah, I mean, Kevin, you really got to just get... There's nothing...

52:42 Drew Hey, don't... Wait a minute, don't overestimate, don't idealize what your students are going to be like. He thought that would be applicable for people who are getting out of jail.

52:50 Adam No.

52:50 Drew His perfect students, no, no, no, they're going to be...

52:52 Adam Well, here's the thing with most high schools, and I know, Drew, you went to the Little Lord Fauntleroy School for albino hemophiliacs, and 100% of your graduating class went off to some sort of higher form of education.

53:08 Drew That's true.

53:09 Adam But at your normal city high school, I would bet that a good 65, 70% of the students were not going off to four-year education. And when I was in high school, well, certainly 100% of the people I knew weren't going off, but even as far as going to a four-year, some people were going to junior college, but that's just an extension of high school. It's high school with ashtrays. The other half were going to go to do some military whatever. And again, that's just guys, that's junior college with guns. Basically, I mean, a smallish percentage were going off to a four-year university, yet the school pretended like everyone was going. And that's how the curriculum was set up. Really, the majority of the people aren't going to that. So let's get realistic and see if we can help the majority. Not stay out of jail, not get anyone pregnant, not pick up a venereal disease, so on and so forth. I'd like to do a whole class on just how not to piss off your stepdad or stepmom so you could squeeze another couple years at home before they boot you. Before the garage. I could do that. Yeah. All right. Let's talk to... Is that what we're...

54:24 Drew Sofina?

54:25 Hello?

54:25 Adam Sofina?

54:26 Sofina.

54:27 Adam You're 21?

54:28 Caller Yes. What's up? Well, I have a boyfriend that is in jail, in federal jail downtown, and he gets me to like dance for him. And I've been going to like over and over again.

54:46 Adam What's he do? Why is he in there?

54:48 Caller Uh, for credit card fraud.

54:52 Adam Right.

54:53 Caller But...

54:54 Drew What do you mean dance for him? What does that mean?

54:56 Caller Like, there's... Somehow, he got... Well, his window... There's an area where I could go and there's like an indentation where I could lean in and you can't be seen from either side. And he'll knock on the window if there's someone coming out of the building.

55:12 Adam Right.

55:12 Caller And...

55:14 Adam So, this is between the glass visiting hours kind of thing?

55:17 Drew No, no, no, no.

55:19 Caller I'm outside.

55:20 Adam You're actually out on the sidewalk?

55:22 Caller Yeah. Well, I'm at the, like, federal building.

55:24 Drew But dance... What do you mean dancing?

55:26 Caller Like, I do a show for him. Like, at first it was just like flashing him.

55:31 Drew Flashing, yeah.

55:31 Adam Right?

55:32 Caller He... I don't know. He has this way of getting me to do whatever he would like.

55:39 Adam Yeah. Hold on, though. I'm still kind of curious. It's daylight. Are you indoors or outdoors?

55:45 Caller Well, it's near the end of the day. So, less people are walking out, walking around. Like, I've been caught before by a guard. And he told me to come during the day, because it was the weekend, that I would mix in better.

55:58 Drew Oh, my God.

55:59 Caller Yeah.

56:01 Drew The guard is giving her advice on how to pull this off.

56:03 Adam I'm still trying to picture the physical location of Sophia.

56:06 Caller How it is. I'm up against the wall.

56:12 Adam But are you in a courtyard?

56:14 Caller Yeah.

56:18 Adam It's always so painful to try to get our callers to explain anything at all. Listen, I get a drunk chimpanzee with a paintbrush up his ass could paint a clearer picture than our callers could.

56:33 Caller There's many entrances to the federal building.

56:35 Adam Right.

56:36 Caller This one is on the inside. It's between the entrance to the federal prison and the courthouse.

56:45 Adam All right. So you're outdoors.

56:47 Caller Right.

56:47 Adam You're in sort of a courtyard.

56:49 Caller Right.

56:50 Adam He sees you from his cell window.

56:52 Caller Right. And maybe it's not his own. I think it's one of his friends because his if he would look at you like that. All right.

56:59 Adam So you're are you dropping your pants?

57:02 Caller I've gone that far. Yeah. Yeah, I've done. You know, it's been getting pretty wild.

57:08 Adam Aren't there a lot of other cell windows facing you, too?

57:12 Caller Yeah.

57:13 Adam So aren't there a lot of guys looking?

57:16 Caller Actually, at first, you know, I only had the idea that he knew about it. And I knew his cellmate would know.

57:23 Drew But I must be charging for this.

57:25 Caller Oh, I know. I don't even strip.

57:28 Adam Okay. Well, listen, what's up with you?

57:30 Caller It's like, what is going on with that? I don't do it anymore because finally now all the guards know about me and they said that.

57:38 Adam All right. What's wrong with you? You don't have any kids, do you?

57:41 Caller No.

57:41 Adam Oh, thank God.

57:42 Caller Yeah, I know.

57:44 Adam And when is this guy getting out?

57:46 Caller In a year.

57:47 Adam And you're going to wait for him?

57:49 Caller I was planning on it, yeah.

57:50 Adam Why is that?

57:53 Caller I fell in love with him. Sure.

57:55 Adam What's not to love?

57:56 Caller Before he went in, I mean, he was a complete asshole to me.

57:59 Drew Yeah, surprise.

58:00 Caller And then since he went in, he realized I was someone.

58:04 Adam Right. How much he loved you?

58:06 Caller Yeah.

58:06 Drew Sofina, what planet are you living on?

58:08 Caller I know.

58:10 Adam Really? I'd like to take your parents and really just give them a good beating.

58:14 Drew Are we raising a foster home?

58:15 Adam I'd like to slap him around and go, you've done a horrible, horrible job. You've instilled almost no knowledge to your poor daughter.

58:22 Caller No.

58:22 Adam The guy was an A-hole, then he goes to jail. All of a sudden, he's Mr. Sweet because he wants you to do the hoochie coochie outside of his window.

58:30 Caller I understand that, but I mean, I mean, because he...

58:35 Adam Watch the F word there, Sofina.

58:36 Caller Sorry, I'm sorry, but it is...

58:39 Drew He will end up being the same asshole when he gets out. Absolutely. It may be worse.

58:44 Caller Do you think I should like date? I don't know, because he has many siblings. Isn't that bad?

58:53 Adam He has many siblings.

58:54 Caller He has many siblings, and I have met one of him.

58:56 Drew Sofina, have you been in a psychiatric hospital before? You're insane. No?

59:00 Caller No.

59:00 Drew Has anybody suggested you take medication or anything?

59:02 Caller No, no, not at all. Not at all. It sounds pretty crazy.

59:05 Adam What do you do for a living?

59:07 Caller What I do? I'm an actress.

59:10 Adam Wait a minute. You're a bartender.

59:14 Caller Yeah.

59:14 Adam Okay. You understand that everyone who's listening to this call is rolling their eyes. Actually, they've come full circle. They started and went around like a slot machine. This guy is a world class A-hole, and you sound like you should be on medication for even entertaining the thoughts that you entertain with this guy.

59:32 Caller Well, he wanted me to mention that. I have thought of dating his brother because his brother is like... He's probably listening right now.

59:42 Drew Sofina, is that supposed to make this more justifiable in some way?

59:47 Caller No, no.

59:47 Drew Or sound better to him?

59:48 Caller I just think he wanted your opinion on the brother part.

59:50 Drew Yeah, we think...

59:52 Caller But, um...

59:53 Adam All right, listen. Okay, all right.

59:55 Caller I have interest in his brother.

59:56 Adam Sofina, here's what I'd like you to do. Because this guy may be paroled soon and kill me. Do not, do not... Listen to me. Do not date his brother.

1:00:07 Caller I don't want to date his brother.

1:00:08 Adam Okay, do not date anybody.

1:00:10 Drew Do not date anybody.

1:00:11 Adam Wait for him, and in the meantime, sterilize yourself so that you can never get pregnant.

1:00:16 Caller Well, I'm getting an IUD.

1:00:18 Adam Get the I... Yeah, okay, get that IUD.

1:00:21 Drew But nobody else.

1:00:22 Caller I don't... Yeah, I don't want anybody else.

1:00:23 Adam Nobody else.

1:00:24 Drew There you go. No, no, no, no. IUDs are not good for women that have not had babies. It can add to sterility, but don't tell love.

1:00:31 Adam Good, good. We recommend the IUD. Listen, I realize that sterility would really help this country. It absolutely would.

1:00:42 Dina Tawfik I hear you're a big fan of sterility.

1:00:45 Drew Maybe we'll develop a tubal beam, sterility beam.

1:00:50 Adam Something that I could hit a young woman with? What kind of range? A couple of hundred meters? What are we talking about?

1:00:56 Drew Same for men. We have a Vastephronectomy beam.

1:01:00 Adam Get to work on that, Drew. All right. Oh, my God. She was a crackpot. Alex?

1:01:06 Caller Yeah?

1:01:07 Adam Year 14? What's up?

1:01:10 Caller Well, first of all, I'd like to say thanks for helping my brother out. He called in like a long time ago and he was Jeb and he circumcised himself in counseling.

1:01:23 Adam I kind of remember that one. Yeah.

1:01:25 Caller Yeah.

1:01:26 Adam My penis still hurts.

1:01:27 Drew Is he OK now?

1:01:28 Caller He's pretty OK. He's seeing somebody and helping him with whatever he was thinking.

1:01:33 Adam Good. What's your question?

1:01:35 Caller I wanted to say thank you. But I have these spots all over my chest and mainly on my back. And they're red. And they're just like the size of probably smaller than a dime.

1:01:46 Drew That's a rash. Alex, why don't you get that evaluated?

1:01:49 Caller Well, I've gotten two doctor's opinions. One said it was from stress. They were just spots from stress. One said they were possibly ringworms.

1:01:57 Drew Yeah, it sounds like a fungus.

1:02:01 Caller I've had them since like fifth grade.

1:02:03 Drew Yeah, did you have it treated?

1:02:05 Caller No, nobody knew how to treat them.

1:02:07 Drew Why don't you get some Selson Blue shampoo just in the pharmacy and drink it, right? And use that like a soap every time you take a shower.

1:02:16 Adam Really? On your body?

1:02:17 Drew Yeah.

1:02:17 Adam Is that a ringworm? Is that a worm?

1:02:19 Drew Fungus.

1:02:20 Adam Yeah, why do they weave worm into that just to freak out all the laymen?

1:02:25 Drew I don't know.

1:02:25 Adam You know what I'm saying?

1:02:26 Drew I have no idea why.

1:02:27 Adam Leave the worm. As a doctor, why don't you make that a cause of yours? Try to remove the word worm.

1:02:34 Drew There's all kinds of weird crap that people sort of, you know, eponyms of names that people use for stuff that make no sense.

1:02:41 Adam Yeah, but a tapeworm is a worm.

1:02:43 Drew I understand. A ringworm is no sense.

1:02:46 Adam Let's just eliminate the worm. What else is that? What do they call that? Lupus or something? What do they call that? Not lupus. They got another word for ringworm, don't they? They're not a technical term for it or something? Yeah, there you go.

1:03:01 Dina Tawfik It's a layman's term, I think.

1:03:02 Adam It's a Latin for worm. Scott?

1:03:06 Yeah.

1:03:06 Adam You're 16?

1:03:08 Caller Yeah.

1:03:08 Adam What's up?

1:03:10 Caller Well, there's this girl I've been talking to. Well, I met her in the fifth grade, but she moved out of town and I ran back into her, you know, and, you know, we got sort of talking these weeks, phone numbers, but I know I'm taking forever, but I'll cut into it.

1:03:24 Adam That's all right.

1:03:25 Caller I fell in love with her, you know, and, you know, basically my whole life, I pretty much hated everybody, you know, and, you know, I fell in love with her, and we were really good friends. It's gotten to the point where we could talk to each other about anything. I mean, we could use a restroom practically and talk on the phone. It was funnier. And then I told her how I felt, you know, it took me four months to tell her. And it seems like ever since then, you know, we haven't been as good as friends. But now, like, I'll tell her how I feel and stuff, and she'll either get mad or she'll go post on me, like, don't talk that way.

1:04:03 Adam You mean when you tell her you love her?

1:04:05 Caller Yeah. And when I tell her she's beautiful, she practically makes a comment that she doesn't think she's beautiful. And like, when we go out in public and stuff, you know, it's sort of like she spends more time talking to everybody else than me, and you know.

1:04:19 Drew Oh, boy, this is...

1:04:20 Adam Scott, this is not a great sign.

1:04:22 Drew Yeah. This is you sort of stalking her, really, or being obsessed with her. It's not a relationship.

1:04:29 Adam Have you ever had a physical relationship with her?

1:04:33 Caller Not really. I mean, it sort of seems awkward if we would be as we're good friends.

1:04:37 Drew All right, you're just friends. Keep it on the friend level.

1:04:40 Adam But you're in love with her, right?

1:04:42 Caller Yeah, but I want to keep it on friends for now and let it grow. But the real mistake I think I've made that really scared her away is, you guys know who the doors are?

1:04:51 Adam The band?

1:04:52 Caller Yeah.

1:04:53 Adam Oh, yes.

1:04:54 Drew We might have heard of them once or twice.

1:04:56 Adam Yeah, I wrote it for them.

1:04:58 Caller They're my gods, but except for you, Adam.

1:05:01 Adam Yeah.

1:05:01 Caller But I went out and bought her a $120 dollars box set. You know, I work at McDonald's. It takes forever to work the money up for that. And I got her it.

1:05:10 Adam Right. And yeah. Hey, Scott.

1:05:14 Caller Yeah.

1:05:16 Adam You sound like you got a little nutty energy coursing through your veins.

1:05:20 Caller I'm like nervous real fast.

1:05:22 Adam Okay. All right. All right. But any 16-year-old is really into the doors. Listen, I love the doors. I really do. But I'm 36, 37 now.

1:05:34 Drew When was your birthday?

1:05:35 Adam That was a couple of weeks ago. A week ago.

1:05:37 Caller My birthday was two days ago.

1:05:39 Adam That was one week ago. Good times, everybody. The point is, is you're freaking this girl out.

1:05:45 Drew Totally.

1:05:46 Adam And you guys are friends, and that's the way she'd like to keep it. And all the talk about romance and relationship freaks her out. And you're going to have to accept that. And why not take some of that energy and channel it towards someone who likes you back romantically?

1:06:01 Caller Yeah, but I'm not contradicting you on saying this right here, because I totally believe what you guys are saying. But her friend that talks to her all the time, that I've known since the third grade, just down told me, like a week ago, that Tonya said she had some feelings towards me.

1:06:15 Drew Scott, forget it. Forget it, Scott.

1:06:17 Adam Forget it. Let me paint that picture. I'll kill myself if Tonya doesn't have feelings for me. Oh, she's got some feelings toward you. Maybe not the same feelings you have, but some feelings. But she has feelings, right? Well, some, good enough.

1:06:33 Drew Good, because I'd kill myself if I thought otherwise.

1:06:36 Adam Hey, Scott, she ain't into you that way. Don't you think she would have let you know by now?

1:06:42 Caller Yeah, probably.

1:06:43 Adam Okay.

1:06:43 Caller She's the type that doesn't tell anyone.

1:06:45 Drew No, Scott, no.

1:06:47 Adam You would know. What do you mean doesn't tell anyone? She freaks out every time you tell her how beautiful she is and how much you love her. Scott, this is reality talking, okay? She ain't into you that way. Every second you spend on her in that way is a waste of time.

1:07:07 Drew Adam's wish that someone had talked to him this way.

1:07:09 Adam I really do.

1:07:10 Drew He was spinning yarns about someone.

1:07:12 Adam You can't want it enough for the two of you. And there's something about being 16 and being a male that makes you think that is possible, which is, well, it's okay. She's not into me at all. I'm into her 200%. And you split that in half, you got 100 each way.

1:07:31 Drew They never tell you what they mean anyway. And she'll be around.

1:07:35 Adam And these guys can exist off a poppy seed of love for months and months and months. All she has to do is throw away one, oh, no, you're not ugly. You're kind of cute. After the guy says, don't you think I'm ugly? Or I'm going to kill myself because I'm so ugly. And they'll live off of that for years.

1:07:54 Drew But usually these ones that are set up this intensely, there was a moment in the early phase of their relationship where there might have been a little possibility of something and then pow, no, forget it. And that's what gets them going, that they let it go.

1:08:08 Adam And the sad irony is this guy working at Mickey D's making five bucks an hour before taxes and buying her the $120 Doors box set which, by the way, is literally a millionaire. I still can't afford that box set. He thinks that makes her love, it's gonna soften her up when really freaks her out just a little bit more.

1:08:31 Drew A lot more.

1:08:31 Adam That much further away. We'll be back to Dash the Dreams of yet another team after this.

1:08:41 Hello, this is Loveline. 1-800-LOVE-191. Loveline will be right back.

1:09:07 Caller Hi, this is David Alan Greer, and you are listening to Loveline with Adam Corolla and the one and only Dr. Drew.

1:09:16 Adam He is, you is. Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. Sex, Love and Choices is the name of her organization. Goes around, travels the country, talks to young people at schools about abstinence and how that affects them and the choices they make. And it's sort of like what we do, except for we don't care and we don't travel. And we get paid ten times as much, maybe fifty. That's great. You know, Drew, we always complain about coming out on the losing end of everything. But look at us, we sit here on our fat asses up on our ivory towers, get paid twenty times as much as someone like poor Dean over there who's a flying coach and taking shuttles and staying in a crappy motel. If you only knew. And look at us up here on our ivory towers and we don't even care. Dice?

1:10:06 Caller Hello?

1:10:07 Adam You're 15?

1:10:08 Caller Yeah.

1:10:10 Adam Is your name Dice?

1:10:11 Caller Yeah.

1:10:12 Adam It really is. Interesting. What's up?

1:10:16 Caller Well, you know my friend, me and him, we both smoke weed, right?

1:10:22 Drew You what?

1:10:23 Caller Me and him, we both smoke weed.

1:10:25 Drew Smoke weed, right?

1:10:26 Caller Yeah.

1:10:27 Caller And like you said that it kills the sperm cells?

1:10:30 Drew No.

1:10:32 Caller Like, no.

1:10:33 Drew Not enough to prevent a pregnancy. It reduces your, it gives you, it can give you breasts. It can take your testosterone low enough to give you a little breast enlargement, but it doesn't do enough to stop a pregnancy.

1:10:43 Caller Oh.

1:10:44 Drew Otherwise, there'd be no pregnancies amongst teenagers in this country, probably.

1:10:48 Caller Right.

1:10:49 Adam Hey, why? What's your plan, Dice?

1:10:52 Caller No, I just want to know, cause like, I like, I don't, I don't use a condom when I have sex.

1:10:57 Drew Well, you're gonna have a baby then.

1:11:00 Caller Oh.

1:11:01 Adam Yeah. You got a girlfriend?

1:11:04 Caller Yeah.

1:11:05 Adam You do?

1:11:05 Caller All right.

1:11:05 Caller I'm not my girl, like, we just mess around.

1:11:07 Caller All right.

1:11:07 Adam How old is she?

1:11:08 Drew She thinks she's your girlfriend.

1:11:11 Adam Okay, but, hey, uh. Dice? Let me give you some real advice. Please, please listen. As you know, I'm a genius. You smoke the weed, you got yourself a nice fourteen-year-old you're banging around with, all that good stuff. I'm not going to talk you out of the weed. I'm not going to try to talk you out of the sex. But really, what I'd like to, I'd like to impress this on you. Do not get her pregnant. That will change your life in a very negative way.

1:11:38 Drew Well, I suppose it's true. We can't force these guys not to screw up their own lives, but to bring another life in and screw that up. Now we're pissed.

1:11:45 Adam No, no. I'm not worried about the kid they bring in the world. I'm worried about me.

1:11:48 Drew Yeah, but that kid is going to screw up your life.

1:11:50 Adam That kid is going to end up carjacking me in 15 years or use up too much of my tax dollars.

1:11:55 Drew Try to sell you energy.

1:11:57 Adam Try to sell me energy. Dice, do not get her pregnant. You must get her on some sort of birth control. You must use a condom. Whatever you got to do, don't get her pregnant and look into that morning after pill.

1:12:10 Drew Do you know what that is? Do you know what morning after pill is? No. It's a pill that she can take after sex if the condom breaks. And it works very effectively against pregnancy. It helps prevent pregnancy.

1:12:23 Adam And Dice, go easy on the weed too, because you weren't a genius before you got it in the weed. And now you're practically retarded because you're getting baked all the time. Okay?

1:12:32 Drew It will damage your thinking and your brain.

1:12:35 Adam Well let me...

1:12:35 Drew I'm sure he knows that the brain is where his thinking goes on. So I want to be a little clearer about that.

1:12:39 Adam Let me float a theory. I've not floated in a while. And nobody wants to talk about this because we do not approach drugs in a realistic way in this country. There are people that have a very high IQ that are very lucid, very articulate people. And if they want to smoke some weed and do some drugs and knock themselves down from 155 to 135 in the IQ range, that is fine. I have no problem with that even if they want to go from moderately intelligent to just average by getting baked every day, I'm fine with that too. Here's where the trouble is. There's a lot of you guys that are on the border of Retardville, as it is. And I know we don't like to discuss this.

1:13:25 Drew What's outside the border of Retardville? What town are you in?

1:13:29 Adam That is Averageburg.

1:13:31 Drew Averageburg, I see.

1:13:32 Adam Averageburg and then there's Retardville.

1:13:36 Drew It actually would be below Averageville, wouldn't it? Just below Averageville?

1:13:40 Adam Well, if you go all the way the southern tip of Averageville, you're below Average.

1:13:43 Drew I see.

1:13:44 Adam You see what I'm saying?

1:13:45 Drew Yeah, below Averageville. Yeah. And that's where the border to Retardville is.

1:13:48 Adam But really, everybody, listen, there are super intelligent people. They're really dumb people. And then there's everyone in the middle. And we never do that. We never want to talk about that. But really, just close your eyes, picture people you know, picture your teachers, picture people you see on TV. There's a lot of retards, a lot of idiots. And then there's some real smart people. If you're almost retarded, if you're on, if you're straddling the border from below average Ville to retard Ville, or below average Berg, sorry, to retard Ville, and you supplement your diet with a lot of weed, you will then be in retard Ville. And that means you'll be a retard, except for you'll not be eligible for any of the benefits that retards get. So you're really screwed.

1:14:36 Drew But you know, you're effectively a citizen of retard Ville while you're smoking. The problem I have is that the depression and the panic attacks and anxiety, all that stuff, stays with them possibly permanently. They get addictive disease on top of that. And that has a whole other sort of natural history to it than just being an effective citizen of retard Ville.

1:14:53 Adam Well, Dice, who would have been the mayor of below average Berg already, is now running for city council in retard Ville because of the weed. So what I'm essentially saying is a guy like Dice is going to have a tough enough time in life without the weed. He's already going to go to junior college, drop out and get a crappy job already. Now with the weed, game over.

1:15:20 Drew That's it.

1:15:21 Adam Right. So all you idiots, don't smoke weed. You smart people. Hey, knock yourselves out. Absolutely. There's nothing wrong with that.

1:15:30 Drew Well, there is, but go ahead.

1:15:31 Adam Nothing. David, you're 17. What's up? Is that me?

1:15:38 Drew Yeah, that's you. Your name's David, right?

1:15:40 Caller No, Davis.

1:15:41 Drew Davis. OK.

1:15:43 Adam What's up?

1:15:43 Caller He's an idiot.

1:15:44 Adam Go ahead.

1:15:45 Caller I have hair on my pino shaft.

1:15:48 Drew Pino?

1:15:50 Caller Pino. Penis.

1:15:51 Drew Penal.

1:15:52 Adam Your penal shaft.

1:15:53 Caller Yeah.

1:15:55 Caller By the way, I smoke weed and I'm still pretty smart.

1:15:57 Adam Well, you're not as smart as you would have been without the weed, which is the point I was making.

1:16:02 Drew I suppose.

1:16:03 Adam Yeah. That's all right. And you're an intelligent guy who's just making yourself a little less intelligent. That's fine with me. I have no problem with that. Yeah. What about that hair growing up the shaft there, Drew? How far up does it go, David? Davis?

1:16:18 Caller It's pretty far.

1:16:20 Caller Like some of it almost goes up to like the head of the penis.

1:16:23 Adam So like...

1:16:23 Caller It's on the other side.

1:16:24 Adam So like two inches?

1:16:26 Caller One.

1:16:27 Adam It's a little small penis humor there, Stoner.

1:16:29 Caller I got you.

1:16:30 Adam Okay. You want to know how to remove it?

1:16:35 Caller Yeah.

1:16:35 Adam All right. By the way, if you're sporting that look at 17, that's going to be a tough road to hoe because the hair... And Drew, you have no hair on your body, even pubic hair, but I can tell you as a man who has a fair amount of hair, especially around the ass region, that that stuff starts coming on later in life. You take a look at a guy 22, 23, with his shirt off, he's not going to have much on his back, much on his chest, just little beginnings. Take a look at that guy in his mid-30s, there's quite a bit more. It does not stop. So if you're having a problem with penis hair at 17, you're going to be a mess at 40. So what should he do to remove that?

1:17:21 Drew What do we say? Just get a clipper, right? We had this call last week.

1:17:24 Adam Yeah, just buzz it off. Just clip it off. And that whole wives' tale about hair growing back thicker or more abundant, like I was yelling about last week, what choice do you have?

1:17:35 Drew And by the way, what happened to our head? Why don't we all look like Chia's? Right.

1:17:39 Adam Well, the point is, is maybe we do. But I mean, maybe we would, but we get our hair cut once a month. Do you know what I'm saying?

1:17:47 Drew Yeah, I know.

1:17:49 Adam But let's just say it does grow back twice as fast.

1:17:53 Drew But we get a cut.

1:17:54 Adam So instead of getting a haircut every two months, you get it once a month. What choice do you have? I always love that when women walk around with that mustache. I got a diet blonde. Nice. Now you got a blonde mustache. Well, I can't trim it. It'll grow back thicker. Great. So you walk around your whole life with half a mustache. Everyone will look at that. Devon? Hi. You're 15?

1:18:15 Caller I am.

1:18:16 Adam What's up?

1:18:18 Caller Well, I actually have a few, but I'll make it quick. First of all, Drew, does pot like speed up your metabolism by any chance?

1:18:26 Drew It can make you feel anxious and it can make you raise your insulin levels to the point that you start feeling sort of jittery like you need to eat.

1:18:34 Caller Yeah. Because like I have never met like a fat pothead in my life and they all eat more than I have in my entire life. So I was wondering, me and my friend both were, if that speeds up your metabolism.

1:18:44 Drew No. Nothing I am aware of.

1:18:46 Adam No. And you will see fat people smoke weed.

1:18:49 Caller Well yeah, but not regularly.

1:18:51 Drew No. You are 15. When they are 20, you will.

1:18:54 Adam You are 15. First off, yes.

1:18:56 Drew Whose metabolism isn't fast at 15?

1:18:58 Adam Right.

1:18:58 Caller True.

1:18:59 Adam As you get older, your metabolism slows down and you will run into plenty of fat hashers. Don't worry.

1:19:07 Caller All right.

1:19:07 Caller Well, Dina.

1:19:09 Dina Tawfik Yes.

1:19:10 Caller I was wondering how you and like your group or whatever like, how you feel about masturbation?

1:19:16 Dina Tawfik How do we feel about masturbation?

1:19:18 Caller Yeah, like as a way of keeping yourself abstinent. Yeah.

1:19:23 Drew Okay.

1:19:23 Dina Tawfik Well, let me just say, first of all, Adam, you're not going to like my answer.

1:19:28 Adam I know because you should get-

1:19:28 Dina Tawfik Let's just resign to that right now.

1:19:31 Adam Here's the problem with you people, quite honestly.

1:19:34 Drew You people.

1:19:35 Adam And the same with this woman we had come in here who was talking about abstinence, right?

1:19:41 Drew It was right to life.

1:19:42 Adam And right to, sorry, right to life. And we said, look, you hate abortions. And she said, oh, yes. And we said, well, they got this morning after pill you can take. It's really going to cut back on abortions. And she said, oh, no, not for that either. And then I said, well, then you're for abortions. And she said, no, I'm not. You want to get people to stop having sex, you better let them masturbate.

1:20:03 Dina Tawfik Well, you know what, though, that's draw. I don't know that that is dropping the standard. I totally disagree because I've actually the reality of it is that I recently read a study that said that people that masturbate are actually more likely to end up engaging in sex, which totally makes sense because you're engaging in it mentally, obviously, in order to masturbate. And so it creates an atmosphere of desiring wanting sex. So that's, you know, the natural thing is that that is my, the natural problem with masturbation. Now there's also, I think, an issue of are you demonstrating, remember what we said what abstinence was? It's self-control, self-discipline, and the delay of self-gratification. Well, you are not practicing any of those three things when you're masturbating.

1:20:52 Drew Here's the real problem with that, though. There has never been a time in history ever when men have not masturbated regularly.

1:20:58 Dina Tawfik I'm sure.

1:20:58 Drew And if they don't, they have wet dreams, and they have to release.

1:21:01 Adam That's it, they have to. Dr. Drew is a very passionate, passionate man.

1:21:05 Drew They have to, they really have to.

1:21:08 Dina Tawfik But here's the deal. I mean, not that I'm in every abstinent man's bedroom, but I do know many young men who are absent, have become absent, and don't have an issue with masturbation.

1:21:24 Drew They're simply a biological reality, they'll build up and release.

1:21:28 Adam No, eventually you just start shutting down and becoming a woman.

1:21:32 Drew No, no, no, there still is always, there has to be wet dreams, there has to be.

1:21:37 Dina Tawfik But I'm talking about the conscious, you know, effort of masturbation. I mean, that's reality.

1:21:44 Adam Well, you're really, you're really asking for a lot. You're really asking.

1:21:48 Dina Tawfik Tell me why. See, I disagree.

1:21:51 Adam Well, listen, here's the other thing too as far as the studies go. I've, I used to believe in studies until I realized, here's how studies work. Hey, we're some fringe group who has a point to make, so go out and give us a study. And then if you come back with the wrong return, go out and do it again and crunch some numbers, whether it's 50,000 Americans dying of second-hand smoke every year, some other cockamamie bull-ass nonsense that people come up with. Of course, people who masturbate are more apt to have sex. I wouldn't say the masturbation leads them to sex. I would say people who have sex and are masturbated, you know, generally more sexual creatures. And so I don't know if there's a direct correlation there.

1:22:38 Dina Tawfik I hear you saying it's asking too much. And who says there's something wrong with asking too much, though? Because what's the, so we drop, well, no, so we drop the standard, you know, to a place where it's so, I mean, the standard has been dropped so low in my generation, people have to crawl through the gutter to get to the other side. I mean, the bar is low.

1:23:00 Adam Right.

1:23:01 Dina Tawfik Low.

1:23:01 Adam Right.

1:23:02 Dina Tawfik So what is wrong with raising the standard to a place where at least you could try, you know, you try to achieve that. There is nothing wrong with that. And I will do that till my dying day.

1:23:12 Adam Well, I'll tell you what I, and I, listen, you're doing the Lord's work, I guess. Why doesn't he get off his ass and do it himself? But here's what I want to say. It's like you're trying to tell somebody to diet and you're saying, look, just stream water and celery. That's it. And the person's going, are you kidding? I eat like 15 Snickers a day and I drive in a circle through the Arby's, the Arby's window. I just actually keep going in a loop. I never stop because by the time I get around again, I've finished off what I've finished off and you're going, just stream water and celery. And what I'm saying is, tell them it's okay to have a cookie once in a while and let's see if we can get them on the diet.

1:23:55 Caller Right.

1:23:55 Adam Because they're going to tune out. They're not going to get on the diet. They're going to go, screw it. I can't do that diet.

1:24:00 Caller Right.

1:24:00 Dina Tawfik And what I'm saying is, I'm not saying that the exp- If you have, if you're abstinent and you've masturbated, that's it. It's all over. Let's, you know, no, that's not what I'm saying. But I'm saying is we can, we can say that with the reality of understanding that it might not pan out all the time. But to bring it to a place where, let's give them something to shoot for, let's stop dropping the ball on this generation.

1:24:24 Adam Well, she said shoot and ball. In her masturbatory way.

1:24:27 Dina Tawfik Well, you know it. Nice.

1:24:28 Adam Okay, good times.

1:24:29 Dina Tawfik On Loveline, I thought it would be.

1:24:30 I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

1:24:34 Dina Tawfik That's it. That's it.

1:24:37 Adam All right, we will take ourselves a little break and we'll be back after this.

1:24:43 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:24:45 Adam We'll be right back. Hey, it's Loveline, kiddies. I'm Adam Corolla. That is my partner over there, Dr. Drew. Brooke Burke is going to be in here at the end of the week from E, Wild On. I'll tell you, I am just madly in love with that woman. Spectacular woman.

1:25:38 Caller Bouncy, bouncy.

1:25:40 Adam And another fine piece of ass, Dina Tawfik is our guest tonight. And that's a compliment. Sex, Love, and Choices is the name of her organization. They go out, they talk. Well, they do what me and Drew would do if we had time during the day. They go to schools and they convince kids not to screw. And God bless her. I really do appreciate what you're doing.

1:26:05 Dina Tawfik Well, thank you, Adam.

1:26:07 Adam I really do. And now you're not married yourself.

1:26:09 Dina Tawfik Not married.

1:26:10 Adam You're waiting.

1:26:11 Dina Tawfik I am waiting.

1:26:12 Adam You're a virgin.

1:26:14 Dina Tawfik I'm not married.

1:26:15 Adam Uh-oh. Made a mistake or two.

1:26:18 Dina Tawfik Absolutely.

1:26:19 Adam And realized that, hey, listen, we know from this show, in theory, that everyone would be better if they had less sex and waited longer and did all of that.

1:26:33 Dina Tawfik Yeah.

1:26:36 Adam And I think our feeling on it is basically like this, getting back to the diet or whatever. Everyone would be better if they exercised every day. Everyone would be better if they ate organic fruits and vegetables. Everyone would be better if they did whatever, fill in the blank, that we don't get to do all the time. But you try to strike a balance and you try not to overdo it. And you do eat fast food every once in a while, but you don't eat it all the time. But once in a while you do and you don't beat yourself up for it. I think that's kind of how we look at sex around here, don't we?

1:27:07 Caller Yeah.

1:27:07 Adam All right.

1:27:08 Caller Thanks.

1:27:09 Adam Dave?

1:27:10 Caller Yeah.

1:27:10 Adam You're 21?

1:27:11 Caller Yeah.

1:27:12 Adam What's up?

1:27:13 Caller Here's my dilemma. I've been with my girlfriend for a little over a year now, and she's all into abstinence and everything. And I had much love for her and I still do. The thing is, it's getting kind of hard. It's already been a year now and I've been trying to be faithful, but lately I've been having this one girl that's really trying to get with me. She knows about my girlfriend and everything and she doesn't mind all of that.

1:27:37 Adam Does your girlfriend want to get married?

1:27:40 Caller That's the thing. She's not really looking for something that's serious right now, but you know, she still tells me that she loves me and she still tells me that she wants to, you know, go ahead and keep going.

1:27:51 Adam Well, wait, hold on a second. She's not having sex with you. She's not looking for anything too serious. Exactly. She may not be that into you. I mean, this thing probably on the way out, if it ever was in.

1:28:05 Drew Possibly. Or, and by the way, this other woman who doesn't mind the girlfriend, will as soon as you have sex with her.

1:28:12 Caller Come again?

1:28:13 Drew As soon as you sleep with this girl who doesn't mind about the girlfriend, suddenly she'll mind.

1:28:17 Caller Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

1:28:19 Drew Yeah, there will be a lot of chaos.

1:28:20 Adam I'm not really getting this relationship exactly.

1:28:23 Caller It's like, okay, let me put it to you this way. We'll do everything except for sex.

1:28:27 Drew Is she in school or she's doing something?

1:28:29 Caller Yeah, she's in school.

1:28:30 Drew What's she training for?

1:28:31 Adam She's in eighth grade, never time.

1:28:32 Caller Okay. Not quite. She actually goes to university down here, USC.

1:28:37 Adam I see.

1:28:38 Drew And what's she training for?

1:28:39 Caller Second year, pre-med.

1:28:41 Drew Yeah, she may have that site set.

1:28:42 Adam Is there a cultural thing? Is she Indian or something? No. Nothing?

1:28:46 Caller She's not Indian.

1:28:47 Adam What is she?

1:28:48 Caller She's an Armo, Armenian.

1:28:50 Caller All right.

1:28:52 Dina Tawfik So it is a cultural thing.

1:28:53 Adam When I say if there's a cultural thing and then guess one of the wrong on one of the 50,000 cultures that are floating around Los Angeles, I don't have to be wrong.

1:29:03 Caller Yeah.

1:29:03 Adam So this may be a cultural thing.

1:29:06 Caller Well, yes and no. Yes and no. It's not like nowadays all of the Armenians follow that culture.

1:29:12 Adam Yeah. But she may be one of them that does.

1:29:14 Caller Maybe. Are you in love with her? Well, I thought I was and I still do care about her and everything, but it's really getting in the way for me.

1:29:23 Adam Okay.

1:29:23 Caller Getting into a relationship.

1:29:25 Adam Hey, Dave. It really, I know it sounds like we tell everyone to break up, who calls this show, but break up. She does not sound that incredibly into you or the relationship, and you don't sound like a huge fan of it either. You guys are just kind of coasting along because you said you loved each other six months ago and you're trying to see that through.

1:29:47 Dina Tawfik And Dave is just trying to get some of this point.

1:29:49 Adam She's telling him, not only are we not going to have intercourse, but I'm not really in a stage of my life where I'm looking for anything serious. Hey, that's out. She's not in this thing at all. Usually she should be saying, look, let's get married or wait for me or something like that. She's not in it at all, and he ain't either. So just get out. Matt?

1:30:09 Caller Yeah?

1:30:10 Adam You're 13. What's up?

1:30:12 Caller Oh, I have this thing called, oh my God, now I can't even say it.

1:30:16 Adam Well, you've been on hold for 108 minutes.

1:30:19 Caller I know.

1:30:19 Adam Jesus, Drew. Drew picks the calls, by the way, so he did it to you. Sorry, brother.

1:30:24 Caller Um, Mona, not Mona, um, Mono.

1:30:28 Drew Yeah?

1:30:29 Adam You have Mono?

1:30:30 Caller Yeah, and I found out today, and it's like, oh my God, and I'm like lost on my strength and stuff.

1:30:36 Drew Yeah, and you get sick from that. You get fever, and you get a sore throat, and you get big sore glands in your neck. It's awful.

1:30:42 Adam Yeah.

1:30:43 Caller And they say I most likely got a sore throat, because I share sores with people and stuff.

1:30:48 Drew Yeah, it's passed through saliva and that kind of thing.

1:30:50 Caller Yeah, but is there any medicine? I know there's no medicine that kill it, but is there like a medicine that help it go away?

1:30:59 Drew Not really. My mono patients, I usually put on antibiotics, because often it seems to me, the sore throat often has an infection on top of the mono.

1:31:08 Caller Yeah, they said it had a, what do you call it?

1:31:10 Drew Strap?

1:31:11 Caller Yeah.

1:31:11 Drew Yeah, so it seems to get better quicker when you put them, at least the sore throat part does, but you're going to be sick for a couple of weeks and that's what mono is. It's got to run its course.

1:31:18 Caller Yeah, they said the longest person that had it was for six months.

1:31:22 Drew Well, it's usually a couple of weeks and it's awful and it's miserable. I had it when I was 17.

1:31:27 Adam You did?

1:31:27 Drew I lost like 30 pounds.

1:31:29 Adam Really? It's awful. Did you get to stay home for a while?

1:31:32 Drew I couldn't get out of bed.

1:31:33 Adam How long did you get to stay home?

1:31:36 Drew I missed like the last month of my senior year.

1:31:38 Adam That sounds so tantalizing.

1:31:40 Drew When you're that sick, it's nothing.

1:31:41 Adam Yeah. Still, when I was in school, I remember as a kid, be out for a month, I think, oh, that lucky son of a bitch. He struck gold. That mono, it's like luck of the Irish. Ron?

1:31:53 Caller Yeah.

1:31:53 Adam You were splashed by a porta potty? Yeah.

1:31:57 Caller I had a little splashback come up and hit my rectum.

1:31:59 Drew Nice.

1:32:00 Adam Sweet.

1:32:02 Caller Yeah.

1:32:03 Caller I mean, it's happened previously. After that, I developed this sitting maneuver I call the hover, where I hover above the sea and it splashes but it doesn't get on me.

1:32:17 Dina Tawfik Long-term maneuver for women there, by the way.

1:32:19 Adam That's something for everyone else to deal with. Right. Plus, you know the guy I love, the guy who just takes the whole roll of toilet paper and just whizzes on the entire thing. Last porta potty I was in, the whole roll was sitting in that urinal, just doused. And I thought, ladies, you want to know what men are about? There you go. I will soak the roll completely.

1:32:43 Drew What's the question, Ron?

1:32:44 Caller Well, now I have, this happened about three days ago.

1:32:47 Drew Make it quick.

1:32:48 Caller And now I have a rash around my rectum and it hurts really bad to walk and to sit and to pretty much do anything.

1:32:55 Drew Someone's got to look at that. I imagine the most likely thing is actually a chemical reaction to the stuff they treat that with anything else.

1:33:03 Adam Right. All right. Good times. All right. Oh, what's up?

1:33:37 Drew I hear genius again.

1:33:38 Adam Yes.

1:33:39 Drew The sultry tones of genius ringing out across the nation.

1:33:42 Adam Thank you. I was just explaining to Drew what a genius I was.

1:33:47 Drew You heard it. Was that not what he was doing?

1:33:49 Adam He requires a booster shot every once in a while.

1:33:52 Drew Do you mind?

1:33:53 Adam Yeah. And I'd let you go. What's it been? It's been three or four days?

1:33:56 Drew A couple of weeks, yeah. No, no, no.

1:33:58 Adam A couple of weeks?

1:33:59 Drew Since you've been quite so explicit in VMA. Yeah, you've been kind of tired, you know.

1:34:02 Adam Well, I was out of town. I was in New York.

1:34:04 Drew Right. That's where I missed it.

1:34:05 Adam Spreading my genius around the East Coast. And then there was the long weekend.

1:34:09 Drew That's it.

1:34:10 Adam Whatever it was, you'd missed out on a few.

1:34:12 Drew Yeah, so you had to dose up tonight. I feel like we're back.

1:34:17 Adam All right. Sex, Love and Choices is the name of the organization. Embrace them. Welcome them to your community or school. Dina, would you like to give that number out again?

1:34:26 Dina Tawfik 626-398-6106.

1:34:30 Drew Again, one more time.

1:34:31 Dina Tawfik 626-398-6106.

1:34:34 Adam Thanks for being here, Dina.

1:34:35 Dina Tawfik Thank you for having me. It's been fun.

1:34:36 Adam And until next time, this is Adam Corolla, the genius, for Dr. Drew, saying mahalo.

1:34:41 Caller I don't use a condom when I have sex.

1:34:43 Drew Well, you're going to have a baby then.

1:34:46 Caller Oh.

1:34:47 This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Sunday, June 3, 2001