Episode 1000754886886

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Voiceover Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, yeah. Loveline, everybody. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number, 1-800-LOVE-191, Dr. Drew, Ford Certified Internist and Addiction Medicine Specialist. Jay Moore in Here Tomorrow Night. Comedian, actor, Jay Moore in Here Tomorrow Night. Tonight, no guest. The guest is really you, the person who calls this show. Yeah? I gave myself some good Mexican food tonight.

1:47 Drew How would you eat?

1:49 Adam Had some leftover. Oh, yeah. You know, I'm such an idiot. I get such a boner for leftovers. It comes from my Elvis-like upbringing, you know? Growing up in that little crappy house with nothing to eat. That even though I'm, you know, I'm a millionaire, literally a millionaire now, I got some, I got a half-eaten burrito in my fridge. You go nuts. I stare at it all day. Not yet. Not yet, my precious. No, the time has not come yet. And I think about it, well, maybe I'll eat it during lunch. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, you'll save it. Use it as the proverbial carrot on the string, dangle it out in front of you, give you some incentive.

2:26 Drew I have a question for you. How come you can't stand it if anything is going on in your environment, even me like drumming my fingers, and yet you don't notice this god-awful music playing in the background?

2:37 Adam What? No, I noticed it. And I just realized, hey, it sounds like we're doing a radio show for like the first 30 seconds. Isn't that what other radio shows sound like? Where they play music and people talk and they're coherent and stuff?

2:53 Drew Don't happen? There's any like introduction?

2:55 Adam Right. But like our radio show is more about you talking about stuff that has nothing to do with the radio show and banging in the microphone and me-

3:03 Drew Me talking about stuff?

3:05 Adam Well, no.

3:06 Drew Trying to talk about stuff while you talk about stuff.

3:08 Adam No, me talking about stuff that has nothing to do with the radio show, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. You alluding to things that are possibly in the room that has nothing to do with the radio show or it does in your own mind. You're pointing at Anderson and saying stuff like, yeah, get that. That's our normal radio, non-radio show. John? Yeah. It's really, it's worse than like a college radio show, I think. John? Yeah. Yeah, you're 20. What's up?

3:38 Yeah, I'd like to ask Dr. Drew. All right. Me and some friends were sitting around and we started talking and we were curious, where did, I mean, why do guys have nipples? I mean, there's no other purpose besides like a sexual purpose, you know? I don't understand why guys would have nipples. And I was just curious.

3:57 Drew Why do you have an appendix? Why do you have tonsils?

4:00 I was told that appendix was to digest meat, like when, like way, way, like raw meat, like way back in the day.

4:06 Adam Right, but it's some remnant of something that you don't use anymore.

4:10 Drew That's right. And the same is true of the nipple, that all mammals have nipples, all male, female. And that is a, as we all start out as females in development, and we all actually have a nipple line. We have a line of nipples like a dog does. And as we express our Y chromosome, that nipple line resorbs, it resorbs in women too, and then men don't get any response, they don't get any estrogen production, so the nipple tissue doesn't respond or grow. But you can make it grow if you want, you can take estrogens and you can make it grow.

4:39 Adam I like that term nipple line.

4:41 Drew Yeah.

4:42 Adam Be good.

4:42 Drew Band name.

4:43 Adam Band name or even for like some active wear.

4:46 Drew Yeah, yeah.

4:47 Adam Nipple line, take it to the limit. You know, something, guys surfing, riding roller blades or something, talking about nipple line action wear. And we were talking about this with all mammals having nipples, but I never seem to see them on dolphins, whales. Yeah, we had this. Were we talking about where the dolphins had them?

5:06 Drew No, we were talking about something about dolphins, but it wasn't about nipples.

5:08 Adam It was about nipples. Well, you see a drawing of a dolphin, you don't see any nipples drawn in.

5:14 Drew Right, that's true, you said that.

5:15 Adam All right, thank you. Thank God Damien over there is working the phones and his mind.

5:21 Seth?

5:22 Adam Seth?

5:24 Drew Seth?

5:25 Adam Hello? You're 19. Sorry to disturb you. What's up?

5:28 Caller I'm sorry about that. I thought you were saying Beth.

5:30 Adam All right.

5:30 It's OK.

5:32 Caller I want to say first, you guys are fantastic, both of you.

5:34 Adam Thank you.

5:36 Caller Adam, you're hilarious and Dr. Drew, you're just great, especially when you get morally indignant.

5:42 Adam Yeah, I like that too.

5:43 Caller It's hilarious.

5:44 Adam Especially when he seriously says, I beg your pardon. And he's serious about it. It's great.

5:50 Drew You like that? Was it Chris Matthews that was doing that?

5:52 Adam When he does a TV show and some some hack gets up there and says, Oh, there's no there's no biological link to alcoholism. I beg your pardon. I beg your pardon. Yeah, I love that. I love when he does that.

6:07 Drew Yeah, and also those for you, by the way, the whole time I love this.

6:11 Caller Sorry, some more rants that Adam can have against dumb people and the dumb listeners.

6:17 Adam All right.

6:18 Caller Those are also fantastic.

6:19 Adam Well, I'm always told I'm told about once every six months in a meeting to cut down the rants.

6:25 Caller Oh, that's such a shame. They're fantastic.

6:27 Adam Yeah. Try not to talk.

6:30 Drew That's the basic note to Adam.

6:32 Adam Drew, seriously, when and we don't have them that often, but I would say twice a year when we have to sit down in an office with somebody who's going to tell us what to do with this show.

6:41 Drew The reason we sit down in the office is to tell Adam to shut up.

6:45 Caller Well, I disagree.

6:46 Adam I know. Well, first off, it's really hard not to be insulted when you're doing a talk radio show and you're told to shut up. I know it's really hard not to be insulted, but I'm really not. It doesn't stop me. All right. Go ahead, Seth.

7:03 Caller Okay.

7:04 Drew Excuse me.

7:06 Caller I have a question. I'm going to be a sophomore in college next year. And I have a question just like when I'm out, if I go to a bar or something, and I meet a girl, I've been told so much about all the different scary STDs that I hear.

7:17 Like, is it safe?

7:18 Caller You know, even if I have a condom, to go back and go have sex with her, like oral herpes and stuff like, you know, genital lupus.

7:23 Drew Look, it's safe, but it's a risk every time you're with somebody new. Certainly. Absolutely.

7:29 Caller So you just sort of have to head your bath and say, you know, I'm going to go for it?

7:33 Drew Well, you have to wear a condom, you have to reduce your risk, you have to make your choices carefully, and you have to realize that this is why, as first I started doing this show, many, many, many years ago, there was no one talking about the biological consequences of sort of unrestricted, unrestrained sexual activity, and that there are biological consequences. It really is, to my estimation, the reason we have the sort of mores that we do, the ideas about sexuality, because it could have hurt people if people, the biological situation is potentially dangerous.

8:03 Adam But just from a sort of general philosophical standpoint, Seth and Drew, this is what life is. It's weighing...

8:12 Drew Calculated risk.

8:12 Adam Risk, yeah. I mean, you drive every day, and that's a dangerous thing to do, but you get a car with an airbag, you wear a seatbelt, and you have the tires properly inflated, and you're not loaded, and you're fine. It doesn't mean a dump truck can't turn over on you and crush you, but you have a much better chance of getting from point A to point B than the guy who's driving the 69 Dart with the four bald tires that have the steel belt showing, and he's not even wearing his lap belt, or he's trying to do a bong load in the diamond lane, you know? So that's all it is. I mean, you wear a condom, you get with chicks that aren't from Haiti, and aren't IV drug users, and you take your chances.

8:56 Drew I think the point, though, is that you need to be aware of the risk, and that's the important thing, is that you really learn how to make healthy choices.

9:05 Adam Yeah, and once in a while, some poor guy gets AIDS or herpes or hepatitis or whatever from a low-risk situation.

9:13 Drew Most of you are going to get warts.

9:15 Adam Most of you will get warts. All I hear is, Drew, all I hear is you saying, world, I have warts. Whenever I hear you bring that up. That's how it translates to me. Kim?

9:26 Yeah.

9:26 Adam You're 24?

9:27 Caller Yeah.

9:28 Adam What's up?

9:29 I was wondering, I heard Dr. Drew talking a few nights ago about side effects of Selexa. And I was on Paxil and Selexa and now I'm an effectser. And I was wondering what are the effects, be it any effects or sexual effects.

9:46 Drew Well, the sexual side effects on all three of those. Selexa, what was it? Selexa, effects or what was the third one?

9:52 Caller Effectser.

9:53 Drew No, effects or Selexa. And what was the third?

9:56 Caller Paxil.

9:57 Drew Paxil. They're all very similar in terms of shutting you down sexually. They can either decrease your arousal, decrease libido, decrease orgasmic functioning. They all have that potential. Effects are probably a little less so than Paxil.

10:09 Yeah, I noticed it when I was on Paxil.

10:12 Drew Paxil is the most potent of the three that way in terms of the three you mentioned. Selects is just a weaker SSRI and then effects has a combination of functions. It's a little different than just the straight SSRI.

10:25 Adam Why with the two S's on the SSRI?

10:29 Drew Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor.

10:31 Adam Yeah, but everyone just says serotonin reuptake inhibitor, don't they? But then they'll say serotonin reuptake inhibitor but then go SSRI. Yeah, don't go for that.

10:42 Drew From now on, I'm going to say selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor.

10:44 Adam Whatever the letters you use, make it from the sentence you spoke. You see what I'm saying? All right, let's see what we can do about that. Are you done with her? I don't know, she seems good. Kim?

10:55 Yeah?

10:55 Adam You're good, right, baby?

10:57 Well, one more question. The more, the higher the dosage, is it?

11:02 Drew More of the side effects, sure.

11:04 More of the side effects?

11:05 Drew Yeah, if sexual side effect is the issue, the three that you can go to is remeron, wellbutrin, and serosone. Those tend not to have sexual dysfunction as a side effect.

11:15 Okay.

11:16 Drew Okay?

11:16 Okay.

11:17 Adam Alright there, Kim.

11:18 Thanks.

11:19 Adam Hey, good times. I don't know why, but once in a while I sit around and think, I watch Monday Night Football, and I think, oh man, I wish I could do that. That'd be a dream job for me.

11:30 Drew Play football?

11:31 Adam No. Thank you. Kick Dennis Miller out of the booth and put me in there.

11:35 Drew Oh, yeah.

11:36 Adam I'd be great at that, I thought.

11:37 Drew Yeah.

11:38 Adam But I was watching tonight, and they played an exhibition game for Mexico, and I thought, no, I'd be fired by half-time.

11:44 Drew You'd be drunk?

11:45 Adam Blah, blah, blah, blah. No, because I'd get in a few bad Mexican jokes in the first quarter and that'd be it. Something would happen. You know what I mean?

11:52 Drew Was that in Mexico?

11:53 Adam Yeah.

11:53 Drew The Raiders game?

11:54 Adam Yeah. Oh, wow. I'd say something that I thought was funny, but it offended somebody, and that'd be the end of me.

12:00 Drew What's even more ironic is I know you. As soon as you just realize that everyone hated what you said, you'd say it again, say it three more times, there were more offensive, you'd go right down that path.

12:11 Adam I just realized I could not be up in the booth for an NFL game in Mexico. It wouldn't work. Something would happen at some point.

12:20 Drew You'd say something offensive.

12:21 Adam Well, that may be true, but, Max, come on. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I'd make some joke. It'd be funny. But most people would like it, but I just realized that it wouldn't last a second. Rachel?

12:34 Caller Yeah?

12:35 Adam Yeah, you're, what the hell are you? How old are you?

12:39 Caller Um, between 20 and 100.

12:42 Adam All right. Well, hang on. Rachel, you hold on until you figure out your exact age, and then we'll get back with Rachel. Matt?

12:50 Hello?

12:50 Adam You're 13?

12:51 Caller What's up? I called yesterday.

12:53 Adam What's up?

12:55 Caller All right. I have a different question than I told the guy, but...

12:57 Adam All right. Hold on. All right. I just have to discipline our callers just a little bit.

13:05 Drew I'll call as you need a little work.

13:06 Adam Well, here's the deal, everybody. You really should ask the question that you gave the screener. Really just sort of helps things along as far as the selection process goes. And the other thing is, is we ask a couple of things of you, which is your name and your age. And if you don't want to give your age, that's fine, but don't call.

13:26 Drew Why don't you get Rachel's age? Just name him.

13:28 Adam No, I'll get Rachel's age. Hey, I mean, you're not talking to Rachel, are you?

13:33 Drew Yeah.

13:34 Adam No?

13:34 Drew Here it comes.

13:35 Adam Don't talk to her.

13:36 Drew All right, here we go.

13:37 Adam All right, I would like to ring her like a bar rag.

13:40 It's in between 20 and 100.

13:41 Adam And get that information out of her. All right, well, let me try her again. Rachel?

13:49 Drew There she is.

13:49 Adam Rachel?

13:50 Caller Yes?

13:51 Adam How old are you?

13:52 22.

13:53 Adam All right, what's your question?

13:55 Caller I want to know what the side effects of Micronor is.

13:58 Drew Just a birth control pill?

14:00 Right.

14:01 Drew The same, all the birth control pills basically have the same side effect profiles.

14:05 Adam Which is what?

14:06 Drew Which is, you know, what?

14:07 Caller Is it going to make me feel pregnant?

14:08 Like nauseous and tired and dizzy?

14:10 Drew Uh, those are potential side effects of birth control pills, sure. But not, you're not like you're truly pregnant, but that's how the pill works. Basically it's tricking your body into believing it's pregnant so it doesn't release another egg.

14:20 Adam Let me, uh, let me say this. I have had a few girlfriends over the years that have been on the pill. All of them have been pains in the asses and princesses.

14:30 Drew All of your girlfriends are the ones that had side effects?

14:32 Adam No, all of my girlfriends. Here's the point. None of them have really complained about the pill. And believe me, I would have hurt it if there was a big problem. I don't think this is a big deal. I know a lot of women, and maybe this is a convenient stance for me to take, but I know a lot of women talk about, oh, bloating or their skin breaking out or this and that. For every thing it does that's negative, there's a woman who will tell you what it does that's positive.

14:56 Drew There are some positives, absolutely.

14:57 Adam And there's a lot of women, they're just on it to keep their skin clear.

15:00 Drew And to keep their periods from being painful or irregular. There's a lot of things that makes you feel better on it.

15:05 Adam So I would say for 85% of women, it's a non-issue. Rachel?

15:12 Caller Yes?

15:12 Adam Have you been pregnant before?

15:14 Caller Yes.

15:15 Adam How many kids you have?

15:18 Caller Who?

15:18 Drew At 22?

15:19 Caller And that's why I didn't want to give you my age.

15:21 Adam You're not 22.

15:22 Caller Yes, I am.

15:24 Adam What year were you born?

15:25 In 79.

15:27 Liar, liar whore, liar whore, you know it.

15:29 Caller Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'll tell you when I'm lying. I'm not lying.

15:32 Adam What's with the mm?

15:32 Drew It's Barbara Streisand.

15:33 Adam And by the way, what kind of strategy is that to tell us when you're lying? You know, people make this kind of statement.

15:39 Caller I'll tell you when I'm lying.

15:40 Adam Hey, you'll know when I'm lying. What the hell does that mean? What am I supposed to do? Snap to attention? Oh yeah, you're wrong. Sorry.

15:46 Caller What do you say to a diaphragm? Is that better?

15:49 Drew It's not as effective. No. Hold on.

15:51 Adam I thought a joke was coming.

15:52 Drew Yeah. Why don't you, if you really are concerned...

15:54 Adam You really got three kids?

15:56 Drew I have three kids. If you're really concerned about being a birth control pill, why don't you look into surgical sterilization, something like that?

16:02 Adam Please. Like what? Surgical sterilization.

16:05 Drew Like getting your tubes tied.

16:07 Are you kidding?

16:08 Drew Why?

16:08 Adam You have three kids. Isn't that enough?

16:10 No.

16:13 Adam What do you do for a living?

16:15 I'm a mom.

16:16 Adam I see. And where's the money coming from?

16:18 From the husband.

16:20 Caller Which one?

16:21 I have one husband.

16:22 Adam And he's fathered all three kids?

16:24 Yes.

16:25 Adam No, he hasn't.

16:26 Yes, he has.

16:26 Adam Not the first one.

16:28 Yes, he has.

16:29 Adam No, he didn't.

16:30 Caller Listen.

16:31 Adam Be honest.

16:31 Caller I had sex with one man and he's my husband.

16:34 Adam All right. And your dad? No. And he's around. What's he do for a living?

16:40 He's a travel agent.

16:41 Adam No, no, he's gay.

16:44 Caller No, he's not.

16:44 Adam There's no straight travel agents.

16:46 Caller No, you're gay.

16:48 Adam You tell Mel. Oh, his name is Mel. Well, he is a travel agent.

16:52 Caller You're gay.

16:52 Adam 60% of male travel agents are named Mel or Gary. Do you know that, Drew? I just read that. All right. Rachel.

17:01 Yes.

17:01 Adam Get yourself fixed because you got three kids and that's plenty.

17:04 Hey, I'm not stopping here, but I just want to stop for a while.

17:07 Drew Then take the pill. Relax. Take the pill like everyone else and there will be a male contraceptive coming in a couple of years. He can take it when the rest of them.

17:16 Adam A travel agent doesn't pay anything, does it? It can't anymore.

17:19 Drew He must own his agency.

17:21 Adam Even with all this price line stuff.

17:23 Drew They have to sell the packages. Cruises. Yeah, packages.

17:28 Adam What a disgusting business. All that is, all that selling of packages and cruises and stuff, that's really, you might as well, you might as well just sell get rich cassettes late night because basically it's about taking old people, getting them away from their money and disappointing them. Those things are always a disappointing wreck.

17:48 Drew Well, you went out with those on.

17:49 Adam I went on a horrible cruise. What a piece of ass that Princess Line was. I didn't know what the hell I was doing. I grew up watching the Love Boat. You know, I thought I was going to be skeet shooting and getting a BJ the whole time. Instead, it was, you know, 18 bucks for a nickel's worth of champagne and bad food. A bunch of geezers running around. Ah, horrible ship. I wish the Captain would have just scuttled that goddamn thing halfway into it. I would have had a better time just floating on a deck chair to Mexico. I really would. What a piece of ass that was. And where were we? Aaron. Yeah, Aaron.

18:25 Yeah, hello, you guys.

18:26 Adam Travel agents are horrible people.

18:28 Drew Not my wife's a travel agent, relax.

18:30 Adam Well, wait a minute. Yeah, I'm honest. I worked at a travel agent agency. It was miserable. Oh, just bitches. Just a big bag of bitches in that place. They should. It was called Hoffman Travel, but it should have been called Bag O Bitches. Big sack of bitches all under one room. Oh, one roof. Horrible.

18:51 Okay.

18:51 Adam Thank you.

18:52 And could I talk now?

18:53 Adam Yeah, you may. No, no, you're about to. The ironic thing is, is if she didn't say, can I talk now? She would have been able to talk.

19:03 Caller Yeah.

19:04 Adam You want to take a break or what do you want to do?

19:06 Caller Keep going.

19:07 Adam Take one. I'm at five. Line five. All right. Matt.

19:12 Yeah.

19:13 Adam You're 16.

19:13 Caller Yeah. Nice to meet you, Adam.

19:15 Adam Nice to meet you, Matt.

19:16 Caller I love listening to the show and I'm sorry my mom's dummy.

19:21 Adam Anyway, my question is, Matt, does your mom sound like a goat?

19:24 Caller Yeah, that was my mom.

19:25 Matt. Matt. Matt, are you jacking off in there?

19:41 Caller I'm sorry. I'm really nervous. All right, Matt. Anyway.

19:45 Adam Seriously, when you're named Matt, how do you know that a goat isn't calling you?

19:50 Caller I don't know.

19:51 Adam See, when your name is Edward, or Phil, you don't have to worry about a goat calling you, but Matt.

19:59 Drew Let's hear Matt again.

20:00 Adam One more. Let me hear one more go. I mean, you go to a petting zoo, your head must explode.

20:08 You're just looking around over your shoulder.

20:11 Drew These goats could talk.

20:13 Mom. Mom, what do they want?

20:17 Adam All right.

20:18 Caller And it's weird because my high school has a huge agriculture department.

20:22 Adam Oh, that's a bad sign.

20:23 Caller And they have the shows and things.

20:24 Drew Your high school?

20:26 Adam Oh, yeah. We had agriculture. Listen, here's agriculture is where they take the loser kids and shove them. They go, look, listen, here's a little farm we set up in the middle of the school. You guys get, you know, get used to it. You're going to be living in a trailer.

20:42 Drew But Adam.

20:43 Adam Yeah. Ray was an agriculture guy.

20:45 Drew You apparently couldn't even cut that aggie.

20:48 Adam I wasn't good enough for that.

20:49 Drew No, you went down to ceramics.

20:53 Adam Yeah, the people couldn't cut it in agriculture, went to ceramics in my school. Hi, Mac. Go ahead there, buddy.

20:58 Caller Okay. My question is, I was learning in biology about the microflage in my lungs.

21:05 Macrophages.

21:07 Drew Macrophages.

21:07 Macro.

21:09 Caller Macrophage. And I was wondering how much marijuana use does the, can the microflage, Macrophages. take before, you know, it starts to really damage your lungs?

21:18 Drew They don't know. All we know is that at an equivalent rate to cigarette, virtually equivalent, you get damage to the airways. Drop out of macrophage, drop out in cilia, fibrosis, spasming of the airway, the airway muscular wall. All that happens, it happens chronically, it becomes fixed, and you can get kind of an emphysema type picture. Chronic bronchitis is extremely common in heavy pot smokers. It usually develops in the first year.

21:45 Adam You know, they used to do these studies that smoking one joint is the equivalent to smoking a pack of cigarettes.

21:51 Drew Yeah, they haven't done that.

21:51 Adam It didn't seem to make sense at the time they were doing it. It was like one of these... I don't know why common sense seems to almost trump medical data, but it does.

22:02 Drew Yeah, because they're trying to make an association in an attempt to make it relatable for people. To make our point, because you understand that cigarettes are bad.

22:10 Caller Right.

22:10 Drew So it doesn't work. But it does, interestingly, do this one thing at a rate similar to cigarettes, and that causes chronic bronchitis.

22:17 Caller Right.

22:18 Adam Okay. And also, is it so much to pot smoke or the way that it is smoked? You know, I mean, the idea is to...

22:25 Drew Listen, if you stood over a barbecue for a couple hours a day, you'd get it too.

22:29 Adam Right.

22:29 Drew You understand?

22:30 Adam No, but I just mean marijuana, the object is to see how much volume of smoke you can get in your lungs and then how long you can keep it there. It would seem like you're...

22:40 Drew Yeah.

22:41 Adam You know what I mean?

22:42 Drew Nicotine users do the same thing, though, too.

22:44 Adam Yeah, but they don't go... You know, they don't take as big a hit as they can possibly take and then hold it for a 30 count. All right. We'll take a little break. We'll come back. Who is it giving us a little attitude? Aaron? All right. We'll speak to you, Aaron, when we come back.

22:59 Caller Loveline, we'll be right back. Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.

23:07 Caller Hey, it's Loveline, everybody. I'm Adam.

23:10 Adam That's Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Jay Moore, who's a very popular personality, comedian, actor coming in tomorrow night. Actually, my take on Jay Moore is a lot of people really like him and a fair amount of people hate his guts.

23:29 Caller Really?

23:30 Adam Yeah.

23:31 Drew No.

23:32 Adam Yeah. He bugs certain people.

23:34 Drew He's a very good guy. You like him.

23:36 Adam No, I've met him and I do like him, but I think it's his character or something. You know how he always plays an a-hole or smart-ass or kind of a know-it-all wise-ass?

23:45 Caller I see. So people actually buy into it a little bit.

23:48 Drew It's a good actor then.

23:49 Adam Easy enough to do. Yeah. That's a compliment that people hate his guts. Aaron?

23:57 Hello.

23:58 Adam Hello. You're 19. What's up?

24:00 Caller Okay. I've been seeing this guy for like about three months now. About a month ago, we started having sex. I would really like to start a relationship with him or take it like a step further.

24:11 Drew Let me understand. Doesn't sex mean there's a relationship going on?

24:16 Caller Well, according to him, we're seeing each other.

24:21 Drew So, according to you, you're having a relationship. According to him, he's just having sex.

24:25 Caller I guess. I mean, but I want...

24:27 Drew Why do you put up with that?

24:29 Adam Oh, listen.

24:29 Caller Let her get her question out. I just want to know how I can talk to him about starting a relationship without scaring him. I mean, I know it will scare him away if I start talking about it. Or I mean, if you guys are guys, I mean, if you wanted a relationship, wouldn't you have brought it up?

24:43 Adam Well, first off, Drew's not a guy. He's a he-she. OK. With emphasis on she.

24:50 Drew And I'll give you the he-she opinion in just a second, as soon as Adam is done shooting his mouth off.

24:55 Adam I'm going to shoot something off in your mouth.

24:57 Caller No, that's, please, please.

25:01 Deal with the fact that I am gay.

25:02 Adam Good jizz joke there. Always good.

25:05 Caller Hey, Aaron?

25:06 Adam Yeah, baby, ass up there, all right? OK, good times. Hello? I don't know. Look, here's what I want to say. What do you mean you've been going out with this guy? Well, listen, you know, this job's hard. You have to listen.

25:20 Drew Jizz guzzling?

25:22 Adam You've been going out with the guy for three months.

25:23 Caller Yeah.

25:24 Adam What have you been doing in that three months before you had sex?

25:27 Caller Well, like going out on dates, like he'll take me out to dinner or we'll just go hang out, like with friends or...

25:34 Adam OK. And for three months, you've been dating.

25:37 Caller Yeah.

25:38 Adam Now, why did you wait so long to sleep with him?

25:43 Caller Well, because I actually liked him and, well, I don't know.

25:47 Adam OK.

25:48 Drew Why didn't you wait longer if he wasn't willing to have a relationship with you? Why did you just not sleep with him?

25:54 Caller Well, because I didn't... I'm still not sure if it's going to get there, you know?

25:58 Drew Yeah. What does sleeping with him do for you?

26:00 Adam Now listen, Drew. Drew, what? Look, she's 19. She's attracted to the guy. Let her have her kicks.

26:06 Drew Yeah.

26:06 Adam Well, we know this is doomed.

26:09 Drew She's doing it because she thinks that makes it closer to a relationship, which it doesn't. It makes it further.

26:13 Adam Well, it does for the 10 minutes he's sweating on her.

26:16 Drew It makes it closer to a service agreement.

26:18 Caller It goes more than 10 minutes.

26:20 Adam The 12 minutes he's sweating on you.

26:22 Caller Okay.

26:23 Drew By sleeping with him, you move it away from a relationship.

26:25 Caller I do?

26:25 Drew Yes.

26:26 Caller Well, no.

26:27 Drew You move it...

26:28 Caller Hold on.

26:28 Adam Hold on. Hold on. Drew, by sleeping with him, she moves it away from a relationship. Possibly...

26:36 Caller Well, no, no, no, no.

26:37 Drew In a situation where she's afraid...

26:39 Adam If he's into her, then she's not.

26:41 Caller Putting it away.

26:42 Drew He's already put her on notice. We're not dating. We're just kind of hanging out. So I'll sleep with him. That'll get it going. No way. He put her on notice. This is a hanging out and hooking up thing and that's it.

26:53 Adam Okay.

26:53 Drew If she chooses to have sex with him, it is just that. It's not because there's a relationship.

26:57 Adam But three months into this, she's having sex with him. If she didn't have sex with him, she'd just be essentially putting off the inevitable.

27:04 Drew That he'd leave.

27:06 Adam Eventually, if he's not going to have a relationship, he's not going to have one in the absence of sex. Do you know what I mean?

27:13 Drew No.

27:14 Adam Look, he's interested in her to some degree, a small degree. And maybe the only thing that makes him interested in her is the outside shot of having sex one of these days.

27:24 Drew Now he's got that.

27:25 Adam Now he's got that. But I'm saying, but your strategy can't be, let's go on on 600 dates and not have sex.

27:30 Drew No, but her strategy should have been, I want a relationship, I want to know this is going somewhere, then we'll have sex.

27:36 Adam Right. In which case she could have got him to go for to have sex and then renege on that later.

27:41 Drew Well, at least.

27:42 Adam Drew's done it many times.

27:43 Caller Could I still bring it up? Like the whole relationship thing?

27:46 Adam Look, you can, Aaron, you have the right to bring up whatever you want and whatever you need.

27:54 Caller How do I put it to him without scaring him?

27:56 Drew Listen, it doesn't matter. Yeah, if he scares off, then he's not who you want to be with. He's not going to be with you.

28:05 Adam Listen.

28:05 Drew Women don't think about this right.

28:07 Adam Listen, everybody, you don't have any power. Your power is basically to hope the other person likes you.

28:14 Drew No, your power is about knowing what you want and asking for that.

28:18 Adam That's not power.

28:19 Drew And if the other person is reciprocating, you're in. If they're not reciprocating, there's nothing you can do to change that. Nothing.

28:26 Adam All right. But it's semantics, because I don't look at that as power. That's hoping the other person's going to see it your way. But that's all you can do. Okay, then.

28:33 Caller Thank you.

28:34 Drew So you got to just speak up?

28:35 Adam Aaron, you know what the answer is. The guy's not interested. I know.

28:39 Caller It's okay.

28:41 Adam He's a 27-year-old jerk.

28:42 Drew Here's the thing about guys. Believe what they tell you. If they say, we are just doing X, Y, Z, we're just hanging out.

28:51 Adam What's his excuse?

28:53 Drew And when you think, oh, he's sleeping with me, therefore he must feel more, he doesn't.

28:57 Adam What is his excuse?

29:00 Caller We've never really talked.

29:01 Caller I mean, he talks about, you know, like he wants to get serious with someone, but he never like makes it for, like he never tells me, okay, it'll be you. We never talk about us. It's always just...

29:10 Adam You have to ask for what you want and risk ending the relationship over it. I understand.

29:17 Caller So you think maybe there's a possibility that he's just the 27-year-old, the horny guy who sees this like 19-year-old who's...

29:24 Adam Possibility.

29:24 Drew I think every 27-year-old would do that.

29:27 Adam Yeah, that's more than a possibility. No! It's 100 to 1.

29:32 Caller Okay.

29:33 Adam All right. But you step up and ask or tell. You understand? Don't just keep going along.

29:39 Caller Okay.

29:40 Adam Okay. Thank you. All right. All right.

29:42 Drew All right. Good luck.

29:42 Adam Good luck, everybody. It really does ruin you. Imagine... Think of all the times you've tried to be with someone. They really want to be with you and the effects that it's had on you, the negative effects. Why put yourself through it? Yeah. You're in a relationship. You can't ask for what you want. You're scared. You're going to scare the guy away.

30:03 Drew It's not a relationship.

30:05 Adam It's not a relationship. And everybody, you're not going to... You'll never scare someone who wants to be there.

30:12 Drew No.

30:13 Adam See, that's the way... See, this is the mistake that people make, which is the guy is about to bite down on the lure, and I'm going to set the hook and gaff him on board, except for I sneezed and he scooted to the other side of the lake. No. If he's going to bite, he's going to bite. And you would have known it two and a half months ago, by the way. And you know it, otherwise you would have said something. You're scared to hear what the truth is.

30:39 Drew On the other hand, he's got his lure set, his properly baited, and you've bitten.

30:44 Adam That's right. Charles?

30:48 Yeah.

30:48 Adam 25.

30:49 Yeah.

30:50 Adam What's up?

30:51 Well, three months ago, I went to the doctor and had a prostate exam, right? And I'm going to find out I had an infection. And my question is basically, what can cause an infection in your prostate?

31:04 Drew It's very common. Are you sexually active?

31:06 Oh yeah, but I'm married, so.

31:08 Drew Well, that's where it comes from.

31:09 Okay. And then, I mean, is there any way to get rid of the infection without taking prescription drugs?

31:13 Drew No. Why wouldn't you want to have it treated?

31:18 I'm sorry?

31:19 Drew Why wouldn't you want to have it treated?

31:20 Well, I do, but it's just I got this phobia of pills and stuff, so.

31:23 Drew What's the phobia?

31:24 Adam Pills?

31:25 Caller Yeah, I can't swallow them.

31:26 Adam Pills are great.

31:27 Drew Well, then crush them up and put in applesauce.

31:30 Caller I guess that would work, wouldn't it?

31:31 Adam Yeah. What's up, puss-o, with them pills?

31:35 Caller I don't know.

31:35 You pansy!

31:37 Adam You can't swallow a pill?

31:39 Caller No.

31:39 Adam That's something's wrong with you. What's up?

31:43 Caller Ever since I was a kid, like, I would take tonne-on, I would almost choke on it, right? And ever since then, I've had a fear of swallowing pills.

31:49 Adam All right.

31:49 Drew Well, that was when you were a kid.

31:50 Adam Get over it.

31:51 Drew You're 25 now.

31:53 Adam I used to think the bogeyman lived under the bed. And I realized he lives in my grandma's house. That's why I don't go over there. Charles? Yeah. Just get over it.

32:02 Drew Here's the other thing about prostate, prostatitis. They actually told you had an infection, not just an inflammation, but most of the inflammations of the prostate are actually due, they think, to stress and can hot baths, elevate the pelvis, that kind of thing helps it too.

32:15 Adam I'd like to make this announcement to all people who claim that they have a problem with something that's abnormal. Feel free just to get over it. Go ahead. Make it a point to get past that.

32:28 Drew Yeah.

32:28 Adam I mean, don't just go, I've got a phobia of pills, and that's it for the rest of my life. Say, look at it as, hey, that's a problem. I should work on it. I don't know. Start with some Flintstones chewables or something and work your way up to an aspirin.

32:45 Drew Or start with a little, you know, coated baby aspirin or something.

32:47 Adam I'm the opposite.

32:49 Drew I know you can't take enough pills.

32:50 Adam I take a handful of-

32:52 Drew I couldn't.

32:53 Adam No, like, if I'm taking vitamins, I take them all at once.

32:55 Drew Yeah.

32:56 Adam I don't put the B and the E and the A and D and the whole thing in one hand, throw it in my mouth, then I take a cup of flour and I put it in my mouth. That's what kind of man I am. I don't even wash it down with water. I use flour, sometimes sawdust.

33:08 Drew To wash it down.

33:09 Adam That's right.

33:09 Drew Good time.

33:10 Adam Just a big cup of flour.

33:11 Drew You know, there's an interesting article going to come out from the House Air Institute about Vicodin and deafness. They're finding out that people use Vicodin chronically and become deaf, and I've seen a case of this where they just get stone deaf. They actually have to get cochlear implants and all that good stuff.

33:24 Adam Yeah. I don't like Vicodin. Not my thing. I don't get anything out of Vicodin.

33:31 You pansy.

33:32 Adam Oh, I had that Vicodin.

33:33 Caller It's Dilaudid.

33:36 Adam What's Dilaudid? What's in that? I need some of that. That Vicodin was nothing.

33:41 Caller Sorry.

33:42 Adam People talk about that. I like to talk to the people who get hooked on that. It didn't do nothing. No, I mean, not half. You know what? You know what that Vicodin was like for me? It was like when someone builds up a movie to you for too long and you hear about what a great movie it is and, oh man, you got to see it and then you go see it and you're like, yeah, this is all right. Right.

34:01 Drew Right. That's why I watch The Shining.

34:03 Adam Yeah. All right. We're going to... No, you got to watch The Shining. We'll take a little break. Is that from The Shining? Yeah, it is.

34:13 Caller Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

34:15 Adam Oh, Drew's never seen The Shining. All right. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

34:27 Caller How you doing out there?

34:30 Adam Oh, glad.

34:31 Good. Good.

34:33 Adam Me too. Me too. Hey, thanks for joining us tonight. We got a hell of a show planned for you. Drew, what's your plan?

34:41 Drew To follow you.

34:42 Caller All right.

34:43 Adam I got a hell of a show planned for you guys. How you doing? Great.

34:47 Caller Thanks.

34:47 Adam Thanks for listening. I'm Adam. That's my partner over there, Dr. Drew. Oh, man. I kid him, but he's a fag.

35:01 Hey, Kate?

35:02 Drew Yeah?

35:03 Adam You're 16.

35:04 Drew No, no. Save Ace till later. We'll have a nice night.

35:08 Adam This is the lighter Ace.

35:09 Drew Come on.

35:09 Adam How you doing?

35:10 Drew Any kind of Ace is nauseating.

35:11 Adam How you doing? How can we help?

35:13 Drew Okay. What's up?

35:14 Caller Hi.

35:16 Drew Go right ahead.

35:17 Caller What?

35:18 Drew Go.

35:19 Caller Okay. Well, when I menstruate, I get debilitating cramps and nausea. And I can't move and ibuprofen doesn't help at all or anything. All right.

35:30 Drew And what does your doctor say?

35:32 Caller Actually, I don't go to a doctor. My mom won't take me.

35:34 Drew How come?

35:36 Caller Because we don't have medical insurance.

35:38 Adam I mean, go to a clinic.

35:39 Drew In a clinic, county hospital, university.

35:41 Caller If I go, I have to pay and I don't have the money.

35:44 Adam Well, then you have to just cramp up and die.

35:47 Drew There are county facilities you don't have to pay at.

35:51 Caller Okay.

35:51 Drew All right. Go to county or go to university hospitals. They're typically no pay.

35:56 Adam Kate, I used to do that myself. I mean, my family didn't have insurance growing up and I would go to those goddamn county facilities. But the difference is you're in Colorado. I bet your county facilities are like a health spa compared to LA. All right. So go over there and take care of yourself.

36:14 Drew Would you please? It could be a lot of things. Could endometriosis, ovarian cysts, lots of stuff can do this. But it deserves treatment.

36:20 Adam You don't have to be What's up with your goofball mom?

36:24 Caller I don't know.

36:25 Adam Well, she doesn't have insurance or anything. But she's got to learn to work the system just a little bit, doesn't she? I mean, do you guys have Medicare or anything like that?

36:36 Caller No.

36:37 Drew Medicaid.

36:37 Adam Medicaid? What's Medicare? Older folks?

36:39 Drew Yeah.

36:40 Adam What do we have? Medicaid?

36:41 Drew Medi-Cal you had.

36:42 Adam Medi-Cal? We had food stamps too. Oh my God. There's nothing more humiliating than going shopping with food stamps and having them tell you what you can't get. You might know what's humiliating. You're standing in line with your mom. She's giving the guy the food stamps. They're like, sorry, you can't buy cat food. But that's for grandma.

37:04 Caller Oh.

37:07 Adam Food stamps.

37:10 Hi.

37:11 Adam You're 28.

37:12 Caller Yeah.

37:12 Adam What's up?

37:13 Caller How you doing?

37:14 Adam Good.

37:15 Caller I'm having problems with me and my girlfriend. We've been together for three years.

37:20 Drew How old is she?

37:21 Caller She's 22.

37:22 Drew All right.

37:23 Caller And like the sex is like basically no more. For how long? Well, she's never been real sexual. But she says she wants to have it. But it's probably been about since the second year. I basically got a beggar to do it. And it's like she says she wants to do it, but she can't for some reason.

37:44 Drew Is she on any medication?

37:45 Caller No.

37:45 Drew Does she have any trauma history or anything that went through?

37:47 Caller Well, she just found out recently that her mom was molested. And she's kind of wondering if maybe subconsciously she's been told sex is bad. She doesn't know.

37:58 Drew Or men are bad.

38:00 Caller Yeah. And recently, because I like to go down and stuff, she won't let me. She said she doesn't like it right now.

38:08 Adam It's the best day of your life. And it's just like I keep a bottle of champagne under the bed just in case that news has ever sprung on me. Party time.

38:20 Caller Yeah, but I like it.

38:21 Adam I don't know.

38:21 Caller I get somewhere.

38:22 Adam But I love it. Good times.

38:24 Caller And nothing's happening. And it's like we'll try. And yeah, no way.

38:30 Adam How about she? Does she give you any oral sex?

38:32 Caller No, that's not happened in New York. She wants to, but it hasn't happened.

38:36 Drew She doesn't want to, but she's just, no way.

38:38 Caller B***h!

38:39 Adam Let me please explain something. Just like I yelled at that p*** who announced that he was scared of pills and therefore as a 22 year old male could not handle swallowing a pill. Get over it. OK, you're a 22 year old chick. Your mom filled you with a few bad ideas. You're freaked out about sex. You got a loving boyfriend who would love to be with you. Give the guy BJ. Just get over it. Hey, you don't want to do it? Good. I don't want to go to work. I don't want to do anything. Think of the percentage of stuff you do that you don't want to do in life. And don't even think about you, Drew. Think about your average dude. Hates his job. Hates doing about three-quarters of the crap he does. Just do it. I mean, I understand that sex is different but you guys have been together for three years. What's wrong with her just doing it?

39:30 Drew I wonder if she's on the pill or something else could be shutting her down.

39:33 Caller Did she take the pill?

39:34 Caller No, we were but then we got off that and now, it's like we have kind of problems too. Like she's smaller than I am down there and it won't fit in. We try everything and she also like pushes me out, but I can't get in there. It's like trying to get into a wall and then we try foreplay and it's like she's just late. She said, oh, he says, well, I don't know what to do. And I'm like, you know, trying everything, but...

39:59 Adam Yeah, there's issues. I mean, you have emotional, psychological and physical hurdles to get over with this girl. Has she gone on any therapy?

40:12 Caller We've tried, but every therapist she's tried so far sucks.

40:16 Adam Why?

40:16 Caller Well, she tried to go to this one lady, she yelled at her in the fun and she's real sensitive. I mean, she's really nice and stuff. And, you know, she already kind of feels weird about going to the therapist. And this like lady yelled at her. And then all the rest of them walked away.

40:28 Drew What do you mean yelled at her?

40:31 Caller She told her like, she was real impatient with her. She was just like, you need to come at this time. Like that, like she hadn't even gone to her yet. She was already real cross with her.

40:41 Caller And I was like, hold on a second.

40:43 Drew She needs to talk to you Adam for a couple of minutes. Let her feel what the real, real firm hand feels like.

40:47 Adam Well first off, you know like when you talk to people and you go, yeah, I want to go to call this, see this therapist and she said I was a fat bitch. It's like, yeah, no, she didn't know. Yeah, yes, she did. No, no, she said I was a fat whore. Call me a fat bitch whore. It's like, no, no, no therapist can call you a fat bitch whore. Well, she wasn't nice. You start getting to it and then you realize, look, the reason you dropped out is the reason you need to stay in.

41:15 Drew That's right.

41:16 Adam The reason you heard her yelling at you.

41:18 Drew Is that was mom. Right.

41:20 Adam That's the reason you need to stay. I've been a five therapist. They've never yelled at no one. No, therapist, you're lucky if you get them to talk.

41:26 Drew You know what I've seen?

41:27 Adam You know, they talk. Here's the most talking my therapist has ever done when he's explained to me why I had to pay for missing a visit because I didn't give him 24 hours notice. That's the most talk I've ever got out of a therapist.

41:39 Drew You know, I watched Castaways the other night on, like...

41:42 Adam I think it's just Castaways, Singular.

41:45 Drew And I realized Wilson, the volleyball...

41:47 Adam Yes, that's a good therapist.

41:49 Drew That's what all of our callers do to everybody. Everybody's Wilson to them. They pour all their crap into nothing, and it's how they see it.

41:59 Adam They originally wanted John Voight to play the part of Wilson.

42:03 Drew I actually was up for that. Very funny.

42:05 Adam Did you get that Voight?

42:06 Drew Yeah, I got the Voight part.

42:09 Adam Woo, there's going to be more of that coming. Look, I'm done with Bill. Bill?

42:13 Drew Yeah.

42:14 Adam There's a couple of things I got to say. She's got to get some therapy. She's got some issues.

42:18 Drew Yeah.

42:18 Adam Forget about this. He or she was mean to me. She has issues she needs to take care of. You, my friend, have to take care of some issues too with all this we stuff. We were on the pill. We were looking into therapy.

42:31 Drew Yeah, that's a mash.

42:32 Adam That kind of stuff scares me that we were on the pill.

42:35 Drew Yeah.

42:35 Adam Nonsense.

42:36 Drew I heard him say that too and I thought, oh boy.

42:37 Adam Bill, I got a chill in my spine. So Bill's a little too enmeshed. She's got problems to take care of. And if it ain't going to work, hey, it ain't going to work. I mean, if it's too much trouble, it's too much really. You've been here for three years, she's 22. If it ain't working, it ain't work.

42:50 Drew A little tough love.

42:52 Adam Give her tough love. Absolutely. Camelia?

42:56 Caller Yes.

42:56 Adam You're 21.

42:57 Caller Yes.

42:57 Adam Hey, how are you?

42:58 Caller Hi.

42:59 Adam Welcome to the show.

43:00 Caller Thank you.

43:00 Adam Welcome.

43:01 Caller I've got a question. I took the Depo-Provera shot almost a month ago and I was wondering if it is normal to have hot slushes and really bad abdominal pain and I'm also gaining a lot of weight and I'm just eating the same I used to.

43:20 Adam Hold on. Is this Rosanne, Rosanna, Dana?

43:23 Caller No, no, no.

43:24 Adam No. Okay.

43:25 Caller No, no, no.

43:27 Adam What about it, Drew?

43:28 Drew Well, the abdominal pain is not a normal side effect of the Depo-Provera. Are you swelling or getting fluid retention?

43:35 Caller I don't know. It started aching like two days ago and it doesn't go away.

43:42 Drew Well, that certainly needs to be evaluated. I don't think it necessarily has anything to do with the pill. The hot flash, or the shot rather, the hot flash is good.

43:50 Caller Okay.

43:50 Drew You know, there are other things. People don't feel the same when they take that depot for shots.

43:53 Adam What is, let me, Camelia.

43:57 Caller Yes.

43:58 Adam Why the depot?

44:00 What?

44:02 Adam I...

44:03 Drew You know, statistically, the drop in the teen pregnancy rate in this country is directly attributable to the use of longer term contraceptive measures like the shot.

44:11 Adam But who, who, who got you on this depot?

44:15 Caller Just a friend of mine told me it was really good that it worked and I used to be on the pill.

44:20 Adam And you like, do you like this better or is it just less hassle?

44:23 Caller No, I don't like it and I want it out of my body.

44:26 Adam I'll suck it out. Come down here.

44:28 Drew How about the pill? You like that? Okay?

44:30 Adam Yes.

44:30 Drew All right. Get back on that.

44:31 Caller But I wanted to try it but I guess it didn't work.

44:34 Adam Yeah. Well, you know, we have gotten a fair amount of complaints about that.

44:38 Drew It's got a fair amount of side effects.

44:39 Adam Yeah.

44:40 Drew Yeah, it does.

44:40 Adam All right. Will you just get back on that pill, all right?

44:43 Caller But is it effective though?

44:44 Drew Oh yeah. Depot, sure.

44:46 Caller Okay.

44:47 Drew Very effective.

44:47 Thank you very much.

44:48 Adam Thank you.

44:49 Okay, bye.

44:50 Adam Adios.

44:50 Caller Charo.

44:55 Adam Yeah. I like that Charo. I used to see her on Love Boat. That's back when a crazy Latin chick could still make a good living on television.

45:03 Drew Saying coochie coochie.

45:04 Adam Yeah.

45:05 Drew What is that?

45:06 Adam I don't know. Charo. I'll tell you one thing about Charo. She could play that flamenco guitar pretty well though.

45:14 Drew That's true.

45:15 Yeah.

45:16 Adam She was actually very good at it.

45:17 Drew I was going to say you'd see that once every three years.

45:19 Adam Right. She pulled that guitar out. You guys remember Charo? No.

45:24 Drew They weren't born yet.

45:24 Adam Nobody knows Charo.

45:26 Poor Charo.

45:28 Adam Charo is actually on, I see her on like a Wix furniture commercial or something now. I've seen her on TV. She's making a little comeback. You guys don't know Charo, huh? No?

45:38 Drew What you missed. She sounds just like Camilla.

45:40 Adam Yeah. We'll take a little break. We'll be right back.

45:49 Caller Loveline, Fast-Growing Outlaw Radio, North America.

45:58 Adam That's radio, everybody. Yeah. All right, let's, uh, Drew, why don't you bang in your microphone or something so we can get back on track here.

46:08 Drew I'm back.

46:09 Adam It's Loveline. That's Drew. I'm Adam.

46:11 Drew You've been a little tossed out, thrown off by our staff here.

46:16 Adam Jay Moore in Tomorrow Night. You guys have heard of him, right? Yeah, that's right. Drew and I are older than most of the folks in this building. So what we like to do is go over a list of celebrities that we know well, that no one else in the building has heard of and then freak out each time they don't know who it is. We've gotten a no to Alex Caris and Merlin Olsen, Lauren Green, I mean like no idea.

46:46 Drew Lauren Green, I don't know what she was, psychiatrist? She did late night TV.

46:49 Adam I was a chick. All right, Anderson, I'm going to give you one last chance for redemption on what I think is a very easy one.

46:56 Drew But we're even giving you sports figures that crossed over.

46:58 Adam Let me give you this very straight one, Bob Crane.

47:01 Caller Hey, no idea. I don't know who Bob Crane is and if I don't know our callers.

47:07 Adam But Bob Crane, you should know because not only was he Hogan of Hogan's Heroes, but he died in like a sex scandal. He was murdered by some partner he was filming Naked Chicks with.

47:21 Caller If they made a movie about it, I would have watched it.

47:23 Adam Well, there's like e-true Hollywood stories about it.

47:26 Caller No, Bob Crane, Tara's in here saying Hulk Hogan.

47:30 Adam Oh, my God. All right.

47:32 Caller F-Troop.

47:32 Adam Let's go.

47:33 Caller No idea. And you know what? Our listeners are even more confused than me.

47:36 Adam No, they can't be. And listen, Anderson, you're not like one of our 14 year old stone listeners. You're like 28 year old stone listener. Right. I'm not really a listener.

47:45 Drew Oh, thank you.

47:47 Adam How old are you, Anderson? Seriously, you got it.

47:49 Drew You're ageless.

47:50 Caller I'm in between 20 and 100.

47:51 Caller Yeah, yeah, yeah.

47:52 Drew I'd be 22.

47:53 Adam Yeah. All right. Christy?

47:55 Yeah.

47:56 Adam Bob Crane? Do you know who Bob Crane is?

47:59 Bob Crane? No, I don't.

48:00 Drew What's the guy who was in After It Was?

48:02 Adam I don't. Larry Storrs.

48:03 Drew No, no, no.

48:03 Adam Yeah. Forrest.

48:04 Drew The other one.

48:05 Adam Yeah. Yeah, I'll tell you who it is. You're thinking of Forrest Tucker. Christy? What's up? You're 20.

48:11 Caller Okay. I'm 20 years old and I've been on the double shop for, since I was 16 years old. And I'm really scared of STDs. And I have a problem with, when I go out with guys, I ask them to take an HIV test. I get tested every six months.

48:26 Drew Just when you date guys?

48:28 Caller Yeah.

48:28 Drew Are you expecting to sleep with every guy you date or?

48:31 Caller No, no. It's just like if I'm really into them, I'll ask them to take an HIV test.

48:35 Drew Do you require a blood test or do you think they'll get a cheek smear?

48:38 Caller An HIV test. Yeah, it's a blood test.

48:40 Drew You require the blood test. Do you make them show you the results, the paperwork?

48:45 Caller Oh, yeah. Because guys will lie about it. Anybody will lie about it.

48:48 Drew Sure.

48:49 Adam No, they wouldn't.

48:50 Drew What about they say, I did, I did it?

48:51 Adam Oh, they do that.

48:52 Caller I mean, a majority of people would lie about it.

48:55 Adam No, I...

48:56 Drew Because it's a hassle. Yeah, it's a hassle. So, the guys don't like to do that. Hey, you're doing them a favor.

49:02 Adam Listen, if you think the majority of guys that you're interested in would lie about taking the AIDS test, you've got a really bad antenna on your head.

49:12 Caller So, you think it's bad for me to ask them that straight out?

49:14 Adam No, I think... No, I don't think it's bad. I think there's something wrong with you that you're so worried about it.

49:20 Caller I just... I appreciate life a lot more than most people do. And I...

49:25 Drew I love... Oh, don't get me wrong. Every guy she dates runs right out.

49:29 Adam That's right. Yeah, the jury is still out on whether we live or die. You know, I'm sort of lukewarm on living. But you embrace life so much that you need to be paranoid.

49:40 Caller I am. I'm very paranoid, but I can't...

49:41 Adam Okay, but don't hand me that crap about how much you love life. If you loved life, you'd be living it.

49:47 Caller I am living it, trust me.

49:49 Adam Instead of asking for test results.

49:51 Drew But each guy runs right out and gets it.

49:53 Caller Because I scared one person away by doing that. And he's just like, you know, forget it.

49:58 Adam Are you good looking?

49:59 Caller I, I, I, I, I model. I do some model. I believe I'm, I'm, I'm not saying I'm gorgeous, but I'm about five, four and about 115 pounds and have umbranate.

50:10 Drew You're fat.

50:11 Caller I'm not fat.

50:12 Adam No, true. She's not fat. Please, how dare you bring that up? Well, listen, you must be good looking. Otherwise, guys are telling you to F right off. So you love life.

50:23 Caller Well, he just wanted a booty call. And I, at the time I didn't want one. So I had one booty call in my life and I made him go for an HIV test too.

50:32 Adam Okay, that's good. Did they have an all night? Do you work with a special doctor? Do you have a guy on call? No. You don't have your own doctor?

50:40 Caller Well, I do have my own doctor, but she's not on a call.

50:43 Adam You don't send them to a special place.

50:45 Drew Do you have others?

50:46 Caller Yes, I do. I send them all to her.

50:49 Drew Do you have other sort of health, physical preoccupation?

50:51 Adam No, she just loves life.

50:52 Drew Yeah. Do you have other concerns, fixations on your health and all?

51:01 Caller Any what?

51:01 Drew Any other sort of preoccupations about your health?

51:04 Caller About my health? No, I just, no, I just, I have my weight fluctuating a lot.

51:10 Adam Eating, little eating disorder?

51:12 Caller Yeah, I don't eat as much. The depot makes me eat.

51:15 Drew Do you have an eating disorder?

51:17 Caller I don't know if it can be considered a disorder. I lost eight pounds in three months and then I gained it all back in one month and then it fluctuates.

51:23 Drew Has anybody ever, has anybody ever suggested you have an eating disorder? Okay. Do you have any other health concerns?

51:31 Caller Um, no, that's about it.

51:33 Adam You ever throw up after you eat?

51:35 Caller Oh, God, no. No, I never did that in my life unless I drank too much one time, so I'm not now.

51:39 Adam All right, baby. What do you want to do for a living?

51:43 Caller Well, right now I'm going to the police academy and I want to become a full-time police officer.

51:48 Adam Oh, God, are you going to be a pain in the ass as a cop?

51:51 Caller Oh, my God.

51:52 Drew You're a lesbian.

51:52 Adam I mean, the worst day ever.

51:54 Caller I'm not a lesbian.

51:55 Adam Christy pulling you over with that goddamn. You know how fat, you know why I pulled you over?

52:00 Caller I love life.

52:02 Adam I love life, so I want to ruin people's lives.

52:05 Caller I'm not ruining their lives.

52:06 Caller I make you think about it. When I pull somebody or give them and take them, I'm actually helping them.

52:10 Adam Yeah, you are. You're helping them not get to work.

52:13 No.

52:14 Adam Yeah.

52:14 Caller Why you should have left 15 minutes and time?

52:16 Adam You know why I pulled you over?

52:19 Caller It's out of time.

52:20 Drew I like that.

52:21 Adam You know why I pulled you over?

52:22 Caller I look sexy in a uniform, so it's all good.

52:24 Adam All right, baby. You better be good-looking because I know you're pain in the ass. I'd enjoy yourself.

52:31 Caller So you guys are-

52:32 Adam I don't know. Listen, I think-

52:34 Caller You think that's wrong then?

52:35 Adam No, it's not wrong. Yes, I do. No, it's fine. Yes, yes.

52:38 Caller If I didn't mind condoms, I wouldn't go through an HIV test.

52:40 Drew You what?

52:42 Adam I'm saying if you are carrying on responsible relations with people who are not in any kind of high-risk area who you know-

52:51 Caller Oh, I date pretty preppy people. I mean, they're pretty clean and I look at their history. If they didn't mourn 10,000 in their whole life, then it's like, screw you. How many?

53:01 Drew How many partners?

53:02 Caller If I dated- I look at their history. If some guy is a big old player or not so much a player, but if he's had a lot of gals in his past and I want to give him the time of day.

53:11 Adam Listen, you know what drives me nuts? Maybe it's just because I've been on the losing end of this, but those chicks would go, listen, I'll tell a guy, hey, you got to do, or else it's bye-bye, toodaloo, thanks, but no thanks.

53:24 Drew What's up? You just wish you could do that.

53:25 Adam She's just a pain in the ass.

53:26 Drew You wish you could do that.

53:27 Adam This is why, remember we talked about being a 20-year-old guy and dating a 20-year-old girl? This is why you're screwed. Look, you really think it's a good- I think it's a nice responsible notion, but I think her motivation is bad.

53:40 Drew We didn't talk about her motivation.

53:41 Adam I think she's a little nutty.

53:43 Caller A little what?

53:43 Adam Little nutty.

53:45 Caller I don't think that's good.

53:46 Adam I think you're a little nutty.

53:47 Caller I think you're not-

53:50 Caller How can I go about it without being so paranoid?

53:53 Adam I mean- Here's what I think, Christine. Get a boyfriend. I think you need to trust- Yes. I think you need to trust and understand people and trust your own instincts. That's what's going on. That's what I'm hearing. So what happened to you?

54:09 Drew Why are you so untrusting?

54:10 Caller I just don't trust anyone. I had a long wish that they end up-

54:13 Adam We understand you don't, but why? Okay. Your dad cheated?

54:19 Caller No. He's actually never cheated. My mom has a lot.

54:22 Drew Okay. There you go.

54:23 Adam Even more screwy.

54:24 Drew Yeah.

54:25 Yeah.

54:25 Caller But I mean, I never cheated on a person my whole life.

54:27 No.

54:28 Drew But you were around that though, that chaos.

54:30 Adam Now it's going to happen.

54:31 Drew Yeah.

54:32 Caller No, it won't happen. So, but I mean, all the time.

54:35 Adam No, it's not.

54:35 Caller Listen.

54:37 Caller One last guy, he was doing his ex-wife and he was doing me at the same time. And that's how you catch AIDS. You know what I'm saying?

54:43 Adam No, it isn't. But listen, here's how you catch AIDS. You sleep with a gay guy or you sleep with an HIV, I mean, an intravenous drug user. That's how you get AIDS.

54:56 Caller But I guess.

54:57 Adam Contrary to all the popular crap that gets forced up our ass about everyone having an equal chance to get it. Gays and intravenous drug users, these are the people have AIDS. Then you go to Africa and you can find it too. But most of your straight guys who are 20, not going to have AIDS. Okay. Who aren't shooting heroin. What's that?

55:18 Caller This is what statistics say.

55:20 Adam Yeah. That's what they say overwhelmingly. It's not the popular. It's not what you can talk about or not what they talk about, but that's the overwhelming statistic. All right. So listen, Christy, your mom's crazy. Your mom cheated on your dad multiple times, and now you're freaked out and can't trust anybody. That's your big issue. Forget about the AIDS test. Thank you. Oh, boy. What must it be like just to date everyone? You can't be trusted. You can't be trusted. I don't know him. You don't know him? Don't sleep with him if you don't trust him.

55:50 Drew That's kind of a projection of what she thinks about herself, though, because she's eventually going to find a nice guy, and then the cheating will start.

55:56 Adam Oh, man. Did she have some energy? Oh, God. Is she going to make a horrible cop? You know why I pulled you over, don't you? Because you can't be trusted. Now, I'm going to give you the ticket for Rolling Through the Red, and then I'm going to give you another ticket for the next time you do something wrong, and I'm not around.

56:16 Oh, oh, oh.

56:20 Adam Robert? Yeah? Listen, all you cops, and we do have cops who listen to the show, please stop pulling people over. Just relax. Go find the closest ATM, park your car in front of it, and wait for someone to get jacked in front of it. But don't worry about the guy rolling through, making the rolling right, okay? On the red, thank you.

56:39 Caller Robert, go ahead. Yeah, it's like the only time I seem to have any luck with girls is when I've been drinking.

56:46 Drew What do you mean any luck?

56:47 Caller You know, like past talking, you know, like making out or anything like that.

56:52 Adam Well, that's your angle, buddy. You got to work it.

56:54 Caller Yeah, but I mean, yes, they're carrying a flask. I mean, like it works sometimes, but like a lot of girls get turned off by that. You know, sure.

57:01 Drew Well, is you ever considered you might have a social phobia?

57:05 Adam Maybe.

57:06 Caller What does that mean?

57:07 Drew Means you have trouble functioning socially. We don't have that book here anymore, but there is this specific diagnostic criteria that basically when your anxiety makes it difficult for you to function effectively, you're aware of it. It bothers you. That's social phobia.

57:21 Caller Maybe a little bit.

57:22 Drew Yeah, and there's actually medication to help with that.

57:24 Adam Well, no, wait a minute. Hold on. The guy's 18. He's having a little trouble with the chicks. Most guys are a little skittish at 18 around the ladies. You don't have your sea legs, you know what I mean? At 18?

57:37 Caller Yeah.

57:37 Adam Most guys do a little better if they pound a few Mickey's Big Mouth in the parking lot for the head end of the party.

57:43 Caller Right.

57:44 Adam Okay. That's just, you got to work it through. Just start, you know, just have two beers next time you talk to a chick.

57:51 Caller Well, yeah, I mean, that's all it really takes, but I mean, I'd like to work away from that.

57:55 Adam All right. Well, next time you go to a party, see if you can get stoned instead.

57:59 Caller No, I don't really like doing that.

58:01 Adam Oh, I see. Well, yeah, I tried. I tried to point the kid in the right direction, Drew, but he wouldn't listen.

58:05 Drew Paxil's been a suggestive of social phobia for years.

58:08 Adam Well, but hold on, Drew.

58:11 Drew Then, of course, he can't have an orgasm, but that's...

58:13 Adam He's 18, he's a little awkward with the ladies. Do you really think he needs anything at this point? I mean, call us back when you're 22 and still unable to talk to chicks sober or without a beer in you.

58:26 Caller Hey, Adam? Yeah. I'm like a big fan of the Man Show. Lately, the season, I don't think they've been as good. Do you guys get new writers or something?

58:38 Adam No, we never had good writers on that show. Thank you, though. All right. Do you have anything particular you'd like to talk about?

58:45 Caller I don't know. It seems to be a lot more like masturbation things.

58:49 Adam Yeah.

58:49 Caller And you and Jimmy naked all the time.

58:51 Adam Oh.

58:52 Caller It didn't seem like there was that much of it in the first couple of seasons.

58:55 Adam Well, you haven't seen anything yet because we got Jock Strap Divas coming up this week. There's going to be some nudity there.

59:03 Drew And, you know, I'm shocked. Did you get Adam and Jimmy together as a bunch of masturbation humor? Shocking.

59:08 Caller I know. I mean, it's good like maybe like one or two a season, but, you know, when you devote a whole show to it, it kind of gets old.

59:13 Adam Did we devote a whole show to masturbation this year?

59:15 Caller Probably. I think I saw one of them. It was like that. And that thing that the 10 minute thing you did about sticking your ass on a guy's face. I mean, I got old after about a minute. What? Yokozuna.

59:26 Adam Oh, no, that was classic. That was Jimmy's cousin, Sal. Now, hey, you know, you need to come over here and give me a BJ. Could you do that? Jackass. That Yokozuna was classic. That's Jimmy's cousin, Sal, jumping on a guy who's asleep at a football game. Pulled his pants down, jumped right on his head. Yeah, classic television and and all caught on videotape too.

59:58 Caller Guy show on television, the man show.

1:00:01 Adam Thank you. Guy chipped his tooth.

1:00:02 Drew Have you gotten Jesse Ventura to come on the show yet?

1:00:06 Adam No, Jesse's people won't give him a message. No, I mean, that's the way it goes. Steve?

1:00:14 Caller Yeah.

1:00:15 Adam You're 14?

1:00:16 Caller Yeah.

1:00:17 Adam What's up?

1:00:18 Caller Yeah, there's this girl in my school. And whenever I ask her out, she like keeps thinking I'm playing around with her. She like laughs, says, oh, yeah, whatever. And I know she likes me because like some of her friends tell me she does.

1:00:29 Drew Yeah, Steve, I don't know if she sort of laughs off your overtures.

1:00:34 Caller Sometimes I really laugh, just like, like, don't really believe me.

1:00:39 Drew Give us a give me an example. What do you say to her?

1:00:41 Caller Like, hey, like, you got me? I'm like, she like just says, oh, no. She's like, smile and doesn't say anything. Oh, no. She's like, weird. She don't really believe me.

1:00:53 Drew Why don't you make one last attempt? Yeah. Yeah. One last attempt where you specify what it is you're going to do, when you're going to get her, what time, where you pick her up, all the details. And if she blows it off, it's not because she thinks it's funny. It's because she doesn't want to do it.

1:01:13 Caller Oh.

1:01:14 Drew All right.

1:01:15 Caller Like her friends told me she likes her.

1:01:16 Drew Well.

1:01:17 Caller It's like.

1:01:20 Adam Why would she, you think she's nervous, Steve?

1:01:24 Caller It could be. I don't know.

1:01:27 Adam You don't know?

1:01:28 Caller No. I don't know. She might be.

1:01:30 Adam How old is she?

1:01:31 Caller Fourteen.

1:01:32 Adam And you keep asking her out and she just keeps laughing it off.

1:01:35 Caller Well, I ask her about it two times.

1:01:37 Adam And what if you say, no, seriously, I'd like to take you out.

1:01:40 Caller Yeah. And she likes to show, yeah, whatever. Like, like she's just like doesn't really believe me.

1:01:46 Adam Well, she ain't into you, Steve.

1:01:47 Drew That's it could be. I mean, she might have skills either.

1:01:50 Adam I don't know.

1:01:51 Drew I suspect it's what you're saying.

1:01:52 Adam Yeah. I don't think she's into you, Steve. Don't you think she'd, you know, ask when you were going to go out, if she wanted to go out with you?

1:02:01 Caller I don't know. She's like, I asked her out.

1:02:04 Caller We get that part.

1:02:06 Adam That we are crystal clear on. It's the part about her not going out with you. That's the part we're discussing.

1:02:11 Drew This is what you'll need to learn to sort of read in women, which is they'll let you know if they're interested.

1:02:18 Adam Well, here's what women will do. They will let you know in a sort of bottom line way.

1:02:24 Drew Yeah.

1:02:24 Adam Which is you're either going out or you wait.

1:02:27 Drew Well, but yes, there's that, but they'll also sort of give you a top line steering, which is, well, I'm not into going out. I'm not available. My mom won't let me go out. Whatever it is, they'll make some excuse, as opposed to making excuses to go out if they're into it.

1:02:42 Adam I have no idea what you're saying.

1:02:43 Drew They'll make excuses not to go out if they're not into it. They'll make excuses to get you to, they'll start leading you towards asking them out if they're into it.

1:02:51 Adam They will never, ever say, no, I do not want to go out with you ever. They'll just laugh it off or they'll say, not this week, ask again next week or they'll do something. But the bottom line is, is you'll not go out with them. And if that's what's happening to poor Steve, then she ain't interested. Then you can try one more time. Travis?

1:03:13 Caller Yes.

1:03:13 Adam It's Drew's pager. You're 18.

1:03:16 Caller Unacceptable.

1:03:17 Caller Yeah, whenever like I'm with my girlfriend in public and we're like holding hands or whatever, she like, and I try to kiss her and she gets all like weird about it, like she doesn't want to kiss in public.

1:03:29 Adam All right.

1:03:30 Caller So I was like wondering if I should just like talk to her about it or...

1:03:32 Adam Why do you want to kiss in public? You're a guy, you shouldn't want to even hold hands.

1:03:37 Caller Well, I don't know, I'm walking around and like I just like to kiss her once in a while.

1:03:41 Adam What's up with those dudes?

1:03:42 Drew You don't have just a peck on the cheek or really make out in front of everybody?

1:03:46 Caller Not make out in front of everybody, just like a peck on the cheek, on the lips or something.

1:03:50 Adam Like finger bang.

1:03:52 Drew How long you guys been going out?

1:03:53 Caller For about two months.

1:03:54 Drew And your boyfriend girlfriend?

1:03:56 Caller Yeah.

1:03:56 Drew For sure?

1:03:57 Adam Yeah. Have you slept with her?

1:04:00 Caller No.

1:04:03 Adam Is that her in the background?

1:04:05 Caller No, that's my friend Ryan laughing at you saying finger bang.

1:04:10 Adam And are you sure she's your girlfriend and you haven't slept with her?

1:04:15 Caller Well, we haven't like slept together but like we've done stuff like that.

1:04:19 Adam She's 18?

1:04:21 Caller No, she's 17.

1:04:21 Adam 17. Why haven't you slept together?

1:04:24 Caller She's kind of new to that kind of stuff.

1:04:27 Adam All right. Well, maybe she's just a little shy in general. I mean, is she a little demure or timid in general?

1:04:35 Caller Yeah.

1:04:36 Adam Well, that's the kind of person she is. Yeah. That's okay.

1:04:39 Caller Is there in like, I can't change her or anything like that?

1:04:41 Drew No, that's her. That's her comfort zone. Let her be.

1:04:45 Caller Okay.

1:04:46 Adam I mean, look, you can get her to trust you, you know what I mean, and, you know, get deeper into the relationship. But if she's a sort of a shy person, that's not going to change that much. You just got to get over it.

1:05:02 Caller Yeah.

1:05:03 Adam I mean, does she pretend like she doesn't know you when you're at the mall?

1:05:07 Caller Well, we'll be walking around through the mall holding hands and all, but...

1:05:11 Adam All right.

1:05:11 Caller She's like...

1:05:12 Adam That's enough.

1:05:13 Caller I don't know. She gets weird about it.

1:05:15 Adam All right.

1:05:16 Caller Hold on.

1:05:16 Adam Let me talk to Drew.

1:05:17 Drew There's a possibility that she maybe doesn't want to be seen as having a boyfriend.

1:05:21 Adam I am getting the vibe from Travis that if he felt totally secure with her and that she was deeply and madly in love with him and attracted to him, that it'd be all right if she didn't kiss him in public just as long as the passion was there when they got home.

1:05:37 Drew That's right.

1:05:37 Adam But this is like a metaphor for what's that she ain't that into him, not only at the mall, but she may not be that into him when they're home either.

1:05:45 Drew Right.

1:05:45 Adam And I think he feels like he's on shaky ground.

1:05:47 Drew Yep.

1:05:48 Adam Maybe I'm just transferring that or something. Travis?

1:05:52 Caller Yeah.

1:05:52 Adam Do you kind of feel like maybe she's not as into you as you are into her?

1:05:57 Caller No, she is because I'll be like standing when we get off work, we kind of work together. Well, I quit.

1:06:02 Adam No, she is. She is. She is.

1:06:04 Caller She'll run up to me and like hug me and stuff and like give me a few kisses.

1:06:08 Adam But then she ever said, all right, she ever said she loved you?

1:06:12 Caller No. She actually said, I love you.

1:06:16 Adam Three months?

1:06:18 Caller Two months.

1:06:19 Adam Two months. Two months, 17 years old. And what's the furthest you've gotten with her?

1:06:26 Caller Finger bang. Finger bang.

1:06:28 Adam I knew that finger bang was going to rear its ugly head at some point. Yeah. And does she call you a lot?

1:06:36 Caller Yeah.

1:06:37 Adam Does she ask to see you a lot?

1:06:40 Caller Yeah, we always hang out at the mall.

1:06:43 Drew Or does she ask to spend, she's going to have time with her friends and don't, you know, don't give me pressure. Those sorts of things.

1:06:50 Caller She's like totally cool around her friends. Like we'll be kissing or whatever. But like whenever we're out in public with other people, like she doesn't know she's that cool.

1:06:57 Adam All right. Well, listen, Travis, she's shy and good because that means half the student, the senior class hasn't nailed her yet. So enjoy that and enjoy that not making out at the mall crap. It's the worst part of a relationship. You should loathe that as an 18 year old guy. You should be humiliated. Okay. And what's he doing at the mall? Why is he spending so much time at the mall? Travis, I work at the mall. You should, you should climb in through a hatch in the roof and then escape via helicopter. You should not be seen strolling around the mall. Do you understand? Yeah. What do you do at that mall?

1:07:33 Caller I work at a Hot Topics store there.

1:07:35 Adam Ooh, Hot Topics. I don't know. What is that? I don't know.

1:07:38 Caller It's like a store that sells like all that alternative clothes and weird gothic stuff.

1:07:44 Adam Oh, you're one of those guys. I knew what that was. All right. All right. We all knew what that was. The room knew what Hot Topics was.

1:07:50 Caller It's Hot Topics, buddy.

1:07:51 Adam Hot Topic. I thought that was like some kind of frozen pizza that came in a pouch or something. I don't know what the F that was at Hot Topic. Hot Pocket? Yeah. That's what I thought it was. It was a food place. All right. We'll be back. Hey, everybody, Loveline. Who's standing next to me on the phone talking to the hospital? All I know is he said, what was it? He's explaining to someone over there what was on someone's IV bag when he left yesterday. Well, let's listen in. Oh, that's it?

1:08:31 Drew Thanks.

1:08:31 Adam That's it, Drew? All right. Well, that was an exciting radio. I was going to listen in to your call to the hospital. Who are you talking to over there? A nurse? Telling her what to do?

1:08:42 Caller Yeah.

1:08:44 Drew Did it sound like it?

1:08:45 Adam Yeah. Some old person lying in bed with a drip bag in their arm.

1:08:49 Drew Yeah, not so old either.

1:08:50 Adam Really? That's bad. What do they got?

1:08:55 Drew Kidney stones.

1:08:56 Adam No, bad times. How old are they?

1:08:59 Drew 50s.

1:09:00 Adam Bad times. Erin?

1:09:02 Yes, hello.

1:09:03 Adam Hey, you're 17.

1:09:04 Caller Yeah. I was just calling to make a comment about the woman who called earlier. We got an AIDS test every six months. You guys were really ragging on her.

1:09:14 Adam That's right.

1:09:14 Caller But every AIDS workshop, anything like that, that I've ever been to, and I've done a lot of volunteer work in the AIDS community, has always said, if you're sexually active, get tested every six months because you can't always completely trust your partner.

1:09:31 Caller Right.

1:09:32 Caller And I just wanted to know why you guys were ragging on her so much.

1:09:35 Adam Because it sounded like she had a problem and that wasn't it.

1:09:41 Caller Okay. I was just, because that sort of had bothered me that, because that seemed a little bit like it was misinformation.

1:09:49 Adam Well, no. It was just maybe a responsible information. But I would argue that what is given out by the AIDS people is misinformation. That's misinformation. That everyone has an equal chance and everyone should get tested and this is an equal opportunity disease and all that nonsense. That's misinformation. They don't give you the clear statistics on who's really at risk here. And in that person we were talking to did not fall into the risk category at all.

1:10:23 Caller Well, if she was female between the ages of 14 and 25, so that's the highest risk category.

1:10:28 Drew No, that's not the highest risk category. I don't know where you got that in. That is the group that has the highest rate of increase from very, very tiny to small. And that's where that risk group comes in. And it's women of color that particularly have the rapid rate of increase. But the problem, Erin, here is that what's happening right now is a backlash against AIDS protective behaviors because of exactly what Adam's talking about. Whenever you take young people and you overstate your case and it doesn't fit with their perception of reality, they'll start rejecting everything you say.

1:11:00 Adam Well, you know, it's funny. The people who are now overstating the AIDS case for the same ones that were arguing against the marijuana case that was made in the 60s and the 50s, which was, you know, the government and the man essentially said this is a psychotic hallucinogenic drug that will drive you insane. And then everyone realized, yeah, it's not really that bad. And then they rebelled against it and smoked a lot of weed.

1:11:23 Drew We'll listen to anything. Yeah. That's what's happening right now with AIDS behavior. Picking the gay communities. They're blowing off their responsibilities because they believe that the risks aren't as great as they're being told and they're sort of blowing off. They're not trusting the people. They're there to give them the information.

1:11:38 Caller Okay.

1:11:38 Drew And the highest risk category is Aaron are still homosexual males and IV drug users. You didn't know that?

1:11:44 Caller No, I did. But just women are...

1:11:47 Drew Rapidly increasing population. No, no, no, no, no. Women of color are a rapidly increasing group and they should be very aware of this. They should be very aware of it.

1:11:58 Caller I think that's what I was trying to say. It just didn't come out right.

1:12:00 Adam Right. But no, they're rapidly increasing from nothing to almost nothing. That's what we're saying. But look, this person we were talking about... Here's the deal, Aaron. I'm not saying people shouldn't get tested for AIDS. Everyone go out and get tested for AIDS. This woman was making a career out of it and sort of obsessing over it in an unnatural way.

1:12:21 Drew And then refusing to use condoms when the rubber hit the road, so to speak.

1:12:27 Adam Right. And to get back to the car analogy, as I always end up doing at least five times this show, is I'm telling people to put on their seatbelt and obey the traffic laws. But if someone calls in and says, I want to wear a crash helmet while I'm driving, I'm going to tell them, look, you're paranoid. Now, you can say, well, this person's being safe, why don't you just agree with them? And I can't argue with you. Yeah, it's safer to wear a helmet when you drive, but you still got to wonder about the person who wants to do that. You think there's a problem.

1:12:57 Caller Yeah.

1:12:58 Adam That's what I thought with her.

1:12:59 Caller I just wanted some clarification.

1:13:01 Adam All right, baby.

1:13:01 Caller I love your show.

1:13:02 Caller Thank you.

1:13:03 Adam AIDS is bad.

1:13:04 Caller Yes.

1:13:05 Adam Okay. And everyone get tested.

1:13:08 Drew That's right.

1:13:09 Adam Thank you.

1:13:10 Drew But you know, it's going to be a hard line to walk going forward is try to figure out how to give people accurate information without using scare tactics, not overstating yet clearly stating, you know, you know what I'm saying? It's going to be hard.

1:13:25 Adam Yeah.

1:13:25 Drew Because there's a backlash going on right now.

1:13:27 Adam Well, just remember, everybody, whenever you hear any kind of numbers on fastest growing population or any of that nonsense as it pertains to AIDS or secondhand smoke or whatever it is, believe me, they can spin it any way they want to spin it. There are 50,000 people die every year of secondhand smoke except for it's 50 people who die every year from secondhand smoke. But if you want to spin something and you have an agenda and you want to scare people, then that's what you do. Mitch?

1:14:00 Yeah.

1:14:00 Adam You're 18?

1:14:01 Caller Yep.

1:14:02 Adam What's up?

1:14:03 Caller I heard earlier in the night, well earlier this evening, that you wanted to talk to somebody that was addicted to Vicodin. No.

1:14:09 Caller No.

1:14:10 Adam Sorry, man. I didn't say that. Did I say that? Yeah, you said it.

1:14:14 Drew No. No. I was talking about the fact that Vicodin is a new study coming out that shows Vicodin causes hearing loss.

1:14:20 Adam Right.

1:14:20 Drew I just made that up.

1:14:21 Caller Then Adam said he didn't understand why people like it and I'd like to talk to people who like it.

1:14:25 Adam I meant it.

1:14:26 Drew Adam was talking, I wasn't listening to him.

1:14:28 Adam Right. I mean, I would like to meet the man who fill in the blank. I didn't mean I actually wanted to talk to him.

1:14:36 Drew Tell Adam what's so great about 5K.

1:14:38 Caller This stuff is like it trips you out hardcore. Well, it's not like it's a hallucinogen, more like it relaxes your body totally. I mean, I have some issues where I get really tense in front of big groups of people. Not antisocial because this just barely started when I started school again. I took this pill the last Thursday. That wasn't just the first time that I've taken it. I've been taking it since May.

1:15:04 Drew Well, Mitch, people for whom Vicodin makes everything okay, right? All of a sudden, when you take Vicodin, everything's great, isn't it?

1:15:12 Caller Well, it's not really that it's great. It's that I'm mellowed out and I can take care of things. I don't have to worry myself.

1:15:18 Drew Right. Everything's okay.

1:15:19 Caller Yeah.

1:15:19 Drew Everything's okay.

1:15:20 Caller Yeah.

1:15:21 Adam He has to say it, not you.

1:15:22 Drew Yeah, I understand that. It means that you're carrying around a lot of stuff all day long, a lot of very heavy feelings that you don't manage well. And the Vicodin anesthetizes that and makes it all okay, removes that pain. And the fact is that is the triggering sort of phenomenon in addiction.

1:15:41 Caller Okay, Nassi. I had this problem last year, my senior year. I had no problem speaking in front of people, like big groups of people. I mean, I got into arguments with our principal in front of the whole senior class. But now in front of my Introduction to Administration of Justice class, I have problems just speaking in front of 40 people. I mean, I choke up, I sweat, I get all the nervous reactions that I see everybody else have.

1:16:07 Drew Well, you can talk to your doctor about getting something called Inderol that's good for stage fright. But taking Vicodin is not the way to deal with stage fright.

1:16:13 Adam Do you take that Inderol an hour before you walk out?

1:16:16 Drew Yeah, 20 minutes.

1:16:17 Adam 20 minutes before you walk out on stage? And how long does it keep you good for? A couple hours. Why don't you give me some of that stuff?

1:16:24 Drew You have stage fright?

1:16:25 Adam No, but, you know.

1:16:26 Drew You get any more mellower before you go out there? You just crash out right there and sleep and you bother going out.

1:16:31 Caller What does the Inderol do?

1:16:33 Drew It blocks the accelerated heart rate and the sweating and the rapid breathing, those sorts of adrenaline kinds of responses.

1:16:40 Adam Would it be good for if you were scared of flying?

1:16:43 Caller Yeah.

1:16:44 Drew See, it doesn't block the emotional experience. It blocks the body experience, the traumatic experience.

1:16:49 Adam If you were scared, let's say, nervous on a first date.

1:16:52 Drew Yeah, which is part of what makes that all the job interview. Yeah. All the physical responses will be blocked.

1:16:58 Adam So if you wouldn't have the big sweat stains under your arms, or your hand might not be shaking. Like, you know, sometimes if you have to read something in front of a large auditorium, you're holding the paper out, you notice the thing is shaking.

1:17:12 Drew Yeah, and then you're done.

1:17:13 Adam You're done. And it's weird, too, because sometimes you don't really feel nervous. You're just holding like a three by five card, and you notice that like a wind blowing in the place. You have some kind of palsy. What the hell is that? Why don't you give me some of that, Drew?

1:17:28 Drew Mineral?

1:17:29 Adam For what? I don't know. I'm always looking for an edge.

1:17:32 Drew Why don't I just give you an ambient before you go out there? You can actually just sleep.

1:17:36 Adam You think I'd still get paid if I just slept? Anna?

1:17:39 Drew Man, I just carry you on that, so you're going to find out.

1:17:43 Adam Drew carries me up on stage, literally. Literally carries me to the stage. Go ahead, Anna. You're 16.

1:17:49 Caller Hi, yeah.

1:17:50 Caller I've slept with four guys in the past, but recently two. And the second guy was like his penis is really big. And then the third guy, he's really small. And he didn't come, but I'm not sure if it's because I'm loose or because he was nervous, or I'm not sure. I know he was stressed at the time. I know that.

1:18:11 Drew What do you mean loose? What does that mean?

1:18:13 Adam Well, because her hypothesis is that the guy with the large penis stretched her out, and then the guy with the small penis came second.

1:18:20 Drew What do you figure is going to happen after you have a baby? That your husband will not have any sensation at all when you're having sex? No, no, no. Your vagina doesn't stretch out.

1:18:31 Caller Oh.

1:18:32 Adam Well, it does. It just snaps back. Yeah.

1:18:34 Drew Immediately.

1:18:35 Caller Oh.

1:18:36 Adam Know what I mean?

1:18:36 Caller Yeah. Well, then maybe it doesn't feel that way because they're like really small.

1:18:41 Adam Well, here's, I mean, from a sensation standpoint, I could imagine if the guy before had a very large penis and then the next guy had a very small penis, you could probably tell the difference. But I don't think he would know the difference. It wouldn't be like the guy, oh, there was a big penis here before me. See what I'm saying?

1:19:04 Drew Somebody has been sleeping in my bed.

1:19:06 Adam That's what I was thinking about. Who's been sleeping in my vagina?

1:19:11 Caller Okay.

1:19:11 Adam My vagina is half eaten. All right, hey, Anna?

1:19:14 Caller Yeah.

1:19:15 Adam So what's up with all this guys and the different penis sizes?

1:19:20 Caller Oh, no, well nothing, like, no, no.

1:19:23 Adam All right, I'll take your word for it.

1:19:24 Drew Four guys in a year?

1:19:26 Adam What about, don't you want a boyfriend from one of these guys?

1:19:30 Caller No, no, no, no, well, see, the first guy was with him for a year and eight months, and the second guy was with him for a year and like nine months.

1:19:37 Drew You started all this when you were 13?

1:19:40 Caller Yeah.

1:19:42 Drew Now we're even more disturbed.

1:19:43 Caller I lost my virginity when I was 14 though.

1:19:45 Adam All right.

1:19:46 Caller So yeah, I was the first guy for like a year before.

1:19:49 Adam Right.

1:19:50 Caller And, oh yeah, and also, all these guys are virgin. So could that be why like the last one?

1:19:59 Drew Why they're so disappointing?

1:20:01 Caller Possibly.

1:20:04 Adam She doesn't want to commit to a negative answer, but that's why the guys didn't perform very well in bed?

1:20:09 Caller No, it's why they didn't get off. I don't know. That's my main concern. It's not me. I'm fine. I don't care. Like I do, but it's not me.

1:20:18 Adam You have an older sister?

1:20:19 Caller Yeah.

1:20:20 Adam I don't mean...

1:20:21 Caller She's a lesbian. Before we go into that.

1:20:24 Caller Oh.

1:20:25 Adam Do you have a medium sister that's between you and the lesbian?

1:20:29 Caller No.

1:20:29 Adam I see. How old is your lesbian sister?

1:20:32 Caller Um, twenty.

1:20:35 Adam What do you think? What turned her lesbian?

1:20:37 Caller Well, she's not fully lesbian, but she's just been with a girl for like five years, so...

1:20:42 Adam What's going on at home?

1:20:45 Caller Uh, nothing.

1:20:46 Adam Where's daddy?

1:20:47 Caller He's here. He's sleeping.

1:20:49 Adam He's sleeping it off? He's passed out?

1:20:51 Caller No.

1:20:52 Adam Does he drink?

1:20:53 Caller No.

1:20:53 Adam Where's my bourbon? What's he do? Fireman?

1:20:56 Caller No, he owns his own repair shop.

1:20:59 Caller What?

1:21:00 Adam What's he repair?

1:21:01 Caller Cars.

1:21:02 Adam No. Working around metal all day long. And, uh, mama, is everyone good to you?

1:21:07 Caller Yeah.

1:21:08 Adam Yeah, everyone loves you?

1:21:09 Caller Uh-huh.

1:21:09 Caller We work together, my mom and I, so...

1:21:12 Adam Where do you work?

1:21:13 Caller Uh, telemarketing.

1:21:15 Adam Oh, bad times. Bad times. What do you do? From home?

1:21:19 Caller Uh, no.

1:21:20 Adam What are you selling?

1:21:22 Caller Uh, memberships.

1:21:23 Adam To what?

1:21:24 Caller For environmental stuff.

1:21:27 Adam I see.

1:21:27 Caller Like Greenpeace and all that.

1:21:29 Adam Ah, all right. You basically bug people all day long.

1:21:32 Caller Oh, yeah. And no, no, no, but I actually am getting a new job.

1:21:35 Adam Good times.

1:21:36 Caller Yeah.

1:21:37 Adam Okay. Well, listen, take care of yourself. And worry about what you get out of sex. Don't just worry about the guys. Okay?

1:21:45 Caller Okay.

1:21:46 Adam All right?

1:21:46 Caller Thanks.

1:21:46 Adam You have needs. It's all right.

1:21:48 Caller Okay.

1:21:48 Adam They can meet those needs. All right. Don't get pregnant.

1:21:52 Caller No, of course not.

1:21:53 Adam All right. Take care. Good times. Get an AIDS test. We'll take ourselves a little break. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody.

1:22:07 Caller Loveline.

1:22:12 Adam You know, I was just thinking about the show and I noticed that I have the same feeling every night. I look at the clock at about 1045 and I go, Holy Christ, we ever getting out of here? And then I look at the clock and it's 1145 and I go, Wow, what happened?

1:22:28 Caller I'm talking to morning.

1:22:30 Adam Hey, Beth.

1:22:31 Caller Hello.

1:22:32 Adam Who are you talking to over there?

1:22:33 Caller Myself.

1:22:34 Caller I talk to myself a lot.

1:22:36 Caller You're yelling about it being two o'clock in the morning?

1:22:39 Caller Yeah. I'm sick of being up late.

1:22:42 Caller Mama says I was spawned.

1:22:44 Drew You were what?

1:22:45 Caller That's all I can say about that. Am I confusing you already?

1:22:48 Adam Mama said you were what?

1:22:50 Caller Spawned.

1:22:51 Adam Oh, I see. You weren't born. You were spawned.

1:22:53 Caller Hell no.

1:22:54 Caller You're overweight.

1:22:56 Caller Double feed for me.

1:22:58 Adam Okay. You're calling from Ventura though, right?

1:23:01 Caller Yes, Ventura County.

1:23:02 Adam So it's a quarter to midnight where you are, right?

1:23:05 Caller Yeah.

1:23:06 Adam Okay. What's up?

1:23:08 Caller Well, quick question. Well, wait, before I get to the question, you had a guy on earlier that was talking about being with a girl for two years. I guess he was like 18 or two months, excuse me. He was about 18. And she was 17 or something.

1:23:19 Adam Right.

1:23:20 Caller And they hadn't slept together yet.

1:23:21 Adam Right.

1:23:22 Caller And you were kind of like, you know, why the heck are you slept with her?

1:23:24 Caller I don't really think that's a big deal, you know?

1:23:28 Caller I don't take it slow.

1:23:29 Caller Let them ride it easy.

1:23:30 Adam No, Andrea was...

1:23:31 Caller You don't have to worry about it. They're young.

1:23:33 Adam Shut up.

1:23:34 Caller Like me.

1:23:34 Adam Quiet.

1:23:34 Caller Shut up?

1:23:35 Adam Yes. Just like a man. Listen, what happened to her?

1:23:39 Drew Anderson took care of her.

1:23:40 Adam Oh, thanks. Anderson, you don't have to pot her down. Here's what I was saying to that guy. I wasn't so sure that she was that into him.

1:23:47 Drew Right, that was the question.

1:23:48 Caller Yeah, I got that.

1:23:49 Caller That was pretty easy to grasp. But just for the people out there listening, it's no big deal to kind of take it slow, if you like.

1:23:57 Adam Hey, Beth.

1:23:58 Caller Yeah.

1:23:59 Adam But you understand the part where I just told you, I'm all right with taking it slow. It's just in his case, it didn't seem... I was worried that she wasn't into it.

1:24:07 Caller Might not have been into the relationship.

1:24:09 Adam That's what I was saying.

1:24:10 Drew So that's why I was asking. He wasn't urging them to have slept together. He was asking what's preventing you from going ahead with it. But guys usually force on women.

1:24:18 Adam That's right.

1:24:18 Caller All righty.

1:24:19 Caller So my question was, I'm sure you get a lot of people calling in. I don't know if you... This is like my second time I've ever listened to your show anyway, so I don't know what the heck you people talk about.

1:24:27 Caller But I met a guy on...

1:24:30 Adam All right, hold on a second. Is it just me tonight or is everyone annoying?

1:24:36 Drew No, they're not annoying. They're openly hostile.

1:24:39 Adam Is that hostile? Oh yeah. Why? Why is that hostile? Just because it feels hostile? It's not hostile if you read the transcript.

1:24:47 Drew If you were talking to someone and you're opening volley with them was... I don't know what you people talk about, but...

1:24:55 Adam Yeah.

1:24:56 Drew Come on. It puts an adversarial spin on it before you even start the conversation.

1:25:01 Adam Well, the other thing I noticed too is people bringing up other calls. And then when I talk about it, they're like, are you done? I got a question.

1:25:09 Drew Or, Adam, love The Man Show. This year it sucks.

1:25:14 Caller All right.

1:25:15 Adam Well, that's just nutty enough to intrigue me. So go ahead and ask your question, please.

1:25:20 Caller All right.

1:25:21 Caller Online. Have you guys ever had anybody calling about online relationships?

1:25:25 Adam Yes.

1:25:26 Caller Okay. Input. I'm 21. We got a guy, 29, in Texas. I'm in California, obviously. And I was just kind of interested about maybe some of the things that people have talked to you guys about.

1:25:36 Drew Yes. They're disasters.

1:25:40 Adam Well, we don't hear about the ones that work out. Are you a big gal, Beth?

1:25:44 Caller Am I a big gal?

1:25:45 Caller No.

1:25:46 Caller Nah.

1:25:46 Caller Let's get some dimensions.

1:25:48 Adam Let's get some dimensions on you.

1:25:50 Caller Why is everybody asking me what dimensions? You're all men.

1:25:56 Caller You're fat.

1:25:58 Adam Dr. Drew, please. I'm trying to get that on.

1:26:00 Caller Okay. Let's see. I'm about 5'5. 140, I'd say.

1:26:03 Adam All right. 140, 5'5. Hold on. Hold on. Let me do the radiomath here. Damn it. And, you know, she just added 10 pounds with the, I'd say, after the 140. So, at about 5'5. She just shaved three inches off that side. Let me do it. Hold on. Let me work the math out here. 5'5, 140, radiomath. She's coming in at 5'3, and an 8'1, 61.

1:26:30 Caller But I'm real fat.

1:26:31 Adam No, no.

1:26:32 Caller I'm a radio.

1:26:33 Adam All right. So, why can't you meet guys in your hometown?

1:26:36 Caller Oh, I do.

1:26:37 Adam All right. But you like this guy?

1:26:39 Caller I just talk to the whole dating thing, you know.

1:26:40 Caller What does that mean? Why?

1:26:42 Caller Oh, gosh. I don't know. I've been, you know, I'm a single mom.

1:26:45 Caller Ooh.

1:26:46 Caller And after that, I just kind of figured, you know what?

1:26:49 Drew You're not in the whole dating thing, and yet you are going to meet a guy in line, and then...

1:26:53 Caller Well, you know, I didn't feel I was going to meet him. That was all on you guys.

1:26:56 Drew How did you meet him? How did you hook up with him?

1:26:59 Caller Chat room.

1:27:01 Drew Just an arbitrary chat room?

1:27:03 Caller Yeah.

1:27:04 Adam Might he come out from Texas?

1:27:07 Caller Oh, I don't know. See, my brother is planning on moving up there with his family in probably a couple years or so, and they wanted me to come with them. And so I might be living out there.

1:27:18 Drew What do you know about this guy?

1:27:20 Caller Just basically what he tells me, which is, you know, one-fighted. He's supposedly like 6'2. He sent me a couple pictures. He seems like a really good guy. At least we get along online. But there's no way to follow that stuff up.

1:27:35 Adam But a couple of years, you might move out there with your brother. I mean, it's so in the distant future.

1:27:41 Caller Yeah, you know, anything can change.

1:27:43 Caller But the thing is, he's kind of getting interested, and I'm kind of getting interested.

1:27:47 Adam All right. Well, does he have any means to hop on a flight and come out to California?

1:27:53 Caller Yeah, whenever I say.

1:27:54 Adam Oh, really?

1:27:55 Caller Yeah, that's what he says.

1:27:56 Caller He will come whenever I can.

1:27:57 Drew I understand. You don't want to date, but you'll date this guy.

1:28:00 Caller I'm thinking about it.

1:28:01 Caller Maybe. I don't know.

1:28:02 Adam Okay. What's he do for a living?

1:28:05 Caller He works for a cement company. I guess he manages some truck.

1:28:10 Caller I don't know.

1:28:11 Caller They do a bunch of oil rigs out there. And I guess he has a little company that they run.

1:28:17 Caller Okay.

1:28:17 Adam Well, here's the deal. Beth, you're a little bit desperate and you shouldn't be going this route. I don't think. But maybe you found a guy. Maybe you like this guy. What's wrong with bringing him out? Here's the thing. Can he come out here for anything else other than to go on a date with you?

1:28:36 Caller Probably not. I mean, if you wanted to, who knows? He can do whatever he wants.

1:28:39 Drew Don't have him. Whatever you do, don't.

1:28:41 Adam He can do whatever he wants. Yeah.

1:28:42 Drew Don't have him come out and spend a week. If you want to meet him in person, do so, but do so in like a public place, not at your house.

1:28:49 Adam Here's what you do.

1:28:50 Drew You don't know who this person is.

1:28:51 Adam He can come out here, stay in a hotel, and go to Universal Studios or something. And on one of the three or four days that he's out here, you guys can meet up for lunch. And if it goes well, you can take it on another date. But don't have him come out, move in with you and your kid for a week.

1:29:08 Drew Exactly. No way.

1:29:10 Adam That's how you got to do it. All right. Where the hell? Jeremy, 17. Yeah. What do you think? What do we think of what? Nanoprobes? Did we already talk about that?

1:29:22 Caller Well, I heard like I heard about this, this like new kind of technology where they're like releasing like little mechanical self, like things into the body. And but like, I couldn't really, I tried looking it up and no one really knew what I was talking about.

1:29:35 Drew Yeah. Long way off these things.

1:29:37 Caller Because like, I mean, if I mean like that be something I'm interested in like microbiology and stuff. But I didn't know like what field that would be under what?

1:29:47 Drew Biologically, you know, biological engineering, that kind of thing. Biomechanical engineering.

1:29:52 Adam All right. Good times.

1:29:54 Caller Paul. Yes.

1:29:56 Adam You're 19. What's up?

1:29:58 Caller Hi. I've been listening to the show for a little while and I hear all these women talking about how they're so not satisfied with the guy they're with because he's so small, like three inches, four inches. And I'm wondering if that's the average.

1:30:18 Adam No. The average is like 5.3 or something like that. At least it was five years ago.

1:30:26 Caller Oh. How do they conduct a survey for that?

1:30:29 Adam I think it's done in Japan because it started at six books about 20 years ago and it's working its way down toward five now.

1:30:40 Drew Are they actually going out and measuring erect penis as I doubted?

1:30:43 Caller Yeah.

1:30:44 Adam Maybe they are with a certain group.

1:30:46 Caller I've actually been told that I'm hung like a hippopotamus. That's what I was talking about when I called in.

1:30:55 Adam Is that good to be hung like a hippopotamus?

1:30:57 Caller I suppose so.

1:30:58 Adam All right.

1:30:59 Caller But... Whatever.

1:31:04 Adam All right. Look, let's just forget tonight ever happened.

1:31:09 Drew I was going to say we need to just cash this one in.

1:31:12 Adam Anderson, is there a shower here that we could all just sort of take a kind of communal symbolic shower in to sort of cleanse ourselves from tonight's show?

1:31:21 Caller The one you peed in.

1:31:22 Adam Oh, I peed in that shower?

1:31:23 Drew Oh, that's the sink, sir.

1:31:24 Adam Oh, the sink. We could fit in a sink. Okay, let's all disrobe and we'll get in the shower and we'll cleanse ourselves and I'll get the loof out and put up your ass and we'll be back.

1:31:34 Caller All right, guys, here's the deal.

1:31:36 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

1:31:39 Drew One call's all you need to make.

1:31:41 Caller Call the Dateline.

1:31:42 Caller 877-889-DATE.

1:31:44 Caller Call the Dateline. Love Line will be right back.

1:31:54 Adam All right, everybody, I want to apologize on behalf of myself, Dr. Drew and the staff.

1:32:00 Drew We are genuinely sincerely sorry and tomorrow night begins a new run of great shows.

1:32:06 Adam That's right, starting with Jay Moore tomorrow night. So until next time, this Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo. Who's been sleeping in my vagina? Okay. My vagina is half eaten.

1:32:20 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood Warm Entertainment.

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Monday, August 27, 2001