Episode 1000754886215

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:06 Go!

1:08 Voiceover Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:13 Voiceover Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew, board-certified physician, addiction-medicine specialist. Drew struck a pose like he was going to say something.

1:28 Drew I was yawning. I didn't want to get busted for that.

1:31 Adam Drew, you have to yawning.

1:32 Drew Every night, your voice, you folks said to me, but listen, I just want to...

1:35 Adam Is it that Pavlovian for you?

1:37 Drew It has really come to that point. And also, I had another thought as you were speaking. I thought, you know, Ann told me the story today. She was looking all over for you. She talked to everyone in your life, the people at Jack Hole, the Jimmy, called everybody. Around three, three and a half years ago?

1:52 Adam No, about five.

1:52 Drew Five?

1:53 Adam At least about five, yeah.

1:54 Drew Four, four says four.

1:55 Adam Four.

1:55 Drew Everyone, everyone, different parts of the city, different regions of your life, had the same answer for her, which is that you were napping. It's nap time. No, it's nap time. Don't buy, we know why you can't find him. It's nap time.

2:08 Adam Yeah. Well, I'm like a tall Mexican that way. I had like, take a CS step.

2:13 It was almost like, no, no, no, no, no, you can't call now. He's napping.

2:16 Drew Nobody, nobody's allowed to talk to him between four and six.

2:20 It was weird.

2:21 Adam Well, you can, you can try.

2:23 Drew His Royal Highness. Well, I did.

2:25 That got me nowhere.

2:27 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Actually, my maid said, the phone kept ringing over and over again. Were you, were you calling?

2:35 That'd be me.

2:35 Adam Yeah. Do you call a few times?

2:37 A few.

2:38 Adam Yeah. Trying to wake me up.

2:40 Doesn't matter.

2:40 Adam To know all the cell. Yeah. Yeah. Shiri Appleby and Jena Malone are both here tonight from Roswell. UPN's smash hit, Tuesday night's nine o'clock. We were just, somebody smells good. I don't know who it is. I know it's not me. I really enjoy that.

3:03 Drew You sprayed the same perfume?

3:05 Yeah, it went like this. It was rocking the door.

3:06 I can barely spray you.

3:07 Adam Jena, lean up on the mic there, please.

3:10 Guest Yeah, sorry.

3:12 Adam Jena, we were talking about was in Donnie Darko during the break and before the show began. And I just saw a billboard for Donnie Darko. I had the most eclectic cast, I believe, I've seen in a movie in a while. Some big names, some small names, some strange names.

3:29 Guest Who haven't been around in a while and...

3:31 Adam Who, give us a cast for that movie.

3:35 Guest Well, Drew Barrymore, Noah Wiley, Jake Gyllenhaal, Mary MacDonald, Patrick Swayze, Catherine Ross.

3:46 Adam Catherine Ross?

3:47 Guest Yeah, Catherine Ross, I mean.

3:48 Adam Yeah, Mrs. C.

3:49 Guest It was amazing to see her, yeah.

3:51 Adam From Happy Days. Next, isn't that Catherine Ross? That's not Catherine Ross?

3:58 Drew Catherine Ross was in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Aid.

4:00 Adam That Catherine Ross?

4:01 Guest Yeah.

4:02 Adam Oh, I was thinking of Marion Ross? What was I thinking of?

4:06 Drew Yeah, not Catherine Ross.

4:07 Guest No, no, no.

4:07 Drew But Catherine Ross.

4:08 Guest Marion Ross?

4:09 Drew Yeah, yeah.

4:09 Adam Yeah, that's what I was thinking of. No, yeah, okay, so we're all back now, but she was on the handle, she was in Butch Cassidy. Yeah. She was a girlfriend in there. Yeah, yeah. I haven't seen her around in a while, have I?

4:19 Drew Two, three decades, no.

4:20 Adam Well, you haven't, you haven't been anywhere.

4:22 Drew That's right.

4:22 Adam All right. Well, anyway, Stepford Wives, Anderson says too.

4:27 Drew Probably wrong.

4:27 Adam Another timely reference. No, he's right. Oh, don't upset him. All right. So anyway, should we go see Johnny Darko?

4:36 Guest Johnny Darko.

4:37 Adam Donnie Darko?

4:38 Guest Yeah. I'm glad to.

4:40 Adam What is that movie about?

4:43 Guest Well.

4:43 Guest Such a good question.

4:44 Guest It is actually.

4:46 Adam It's hard to figure out from the billboard.

4:48 Guest It is.

4:48 Guest I mean, the billboard doesn't really give that much away as well. It's just the bunny mask sort of with all these different images of the film and sort of it's a little bit darker than I think the film really is a little bit more horror-like.

5:02 Adam What is it about? What is the theme of the movie?

5:04 Guest So basically, I mean, if you strip it all down, it's a coming of age story of this boy, you know, who's it's sort of like a dark 80s science fiction thriller, Hitchcockian, romantic.

5:18 Drew American Pie.

5:19 Guest Coming of age.

5:20 Adam Is somebody, time travel story. Is Darko killing people?

5:25 Guest No, but he's being visited by this sort of thing in his subconscious that's telling him to do things and he's got this vision of the world that's going to be ending pretty soon.

5:37 Adam I heard it was a good movie. I was just actually talking to...

5:40 Guest I mean, I think some of the, you know, films that I enjoy, the ones that are the hardest to describe and understand fully, you know, you can't sum it all up in one word and say, I'm with you, but I think people don't have a handle on what it is.

5:54 Adam Like, they don't know if they should take their kids or not. You know what I'm saying? Like, they don't know what the theme of it is.

6:01 Guest It's got really funny moments.

6:02 Guest I mean, you've seen it. What do you think?

6:04 Guest I liked it. I didn't understand it at the beginning. I asked Jena what it was about.

6:07 Drew After watching it?

6:09 Guest You sit there and it's like saying something and you get it, and then at the end, it just, I don't know. I got it. She explained it to me. It just takes you a minute. You have to think about the movie. It's not like an American pie. It makes you think about what's actually happening, because something's definitely happening to this kid. He's going through it. It's kind of interesting.

6:27 Guest I mean, just structure-wise.

6:28 Adam We'll rant it and figure it out. We don't need to come to the theater.

6:31 Guest Well, no. I mean, okay.

6:33 Adam Hold on. Anderson has seen it.

6:34 I hate movies, but I saw this one twice over the weekend.

6:37 Adam Saw it twice? Wow.

6:39 It's really like American Beauty Meets Twilight Zone.

6:42 Guest Totally.

6:42 Adam So, and can you describe what it was about, Anderson?

6:45 No.

6:46 Adam But you saw it twice.

6:47 Guest Yeah, it touches on like schizophrenia. Yeah.

6:51 Adam So, we're seeing.

6:52 Drew Definitely, we're seeing.

6:53 Guest Oh, it's a good movie.

6:54 Adam But I think I've heard a bad ad campaign in the sense that I think they needed to give people more to work with or something. I don't think people got a handle on what it was.

7:05 Drew Did you sit through it twice on the same ticket?

7:07 Not two different days.

7:09 It's shot really well, though.

7:10 Guest It looks beautiful.

7:11 It's just a really good movie.

7:13 Guest I think not everything should be as easy and as given to the audience as what is normally given. So, I think sometimes it's good to just say, look at this and maybe here's an image. Go and see maybe what it's about, you know?

7:23 Adam Well, also, if you get really baked, you can see movies twice, Drew. You don't understand that.

7:30 Drew I don't, no.

7:31 Adam And you can enjoy them more the first time. And if you're stoned, and then you can see them again and not really remember it.

7:38 Drew You enjoy it most the first time, but then you see it again, it's a whole new experience.

7:42 Adam Absolutely.

7:43 I haven't smoked pot in two years.

7:45 Adam Really? All right.

7:46 You should. What do you do?

7:47 Adam Would you bring a flask into the theater? What do you do? A little heroin. All right, great.

7:52 All right.

7:52 Adam And Roswell, what the hell night is it? Tomorrow night, right?

7:56 Guest Yeah, tomorrow night.

7:56 Adam Tuesday night. What's going on tomorrow night on Roswell?

7:59 Guest Oh, it's about, remember that girl Mahendra that was here last time? Mm-hmm. It's about her character. She starts singing again.

8:07 Adam All right. Well, we're going to... Really?

8:09 Guest Yeah, she's a singer. She starts singing again. I swear to God.

8:12 Adam I'm not tuning in for that.

8:13 Guest And a boy comes in a jam. It's really going to be an exciting episode of Roswell.

8:16 Adam All right.

8:17 Well, we're going to watch.

8:18 Adam Drew, you're going to watch tomorrow night?

8:19 Drew Of course. What time?

8:21 Adam Nine o'clock.

8:22 Drew Nine o'clock.

8:22 Adam Rain?

8:23 Yeah.

8:24 Adam What's up?

8:25 Well, I had a question about different types of orgasms.

8:29 Adam All right.

8:30 Okay. Well, I was watching TV earlier, and it was a program that had a problem with a school newspaper, and they had a question in the newspaper about a boob orgasm. I really wasn't paying attention until I heard boob orgasm, and I thought, well, wait a minute, I haven't had one of those.

8:49 Drew I'm more interested in this problem with the school newspaper.

8:54 It really wasn't watching. It was a TV show. I was just kind of messing around. It was Boston Public, so.

8:59 Drew Oh, okay, okay. It was a drama. Okay.

9:02 Yeah.

9:02 Drew And boob orgasm was one of the questions in the paper.

9:04 Yeah, well, it really made the principal mad. That's what got his attention. But I was just thinking.

9:10 Adam Hey, Rain, you understand we didn't see that show tonight with you, right?

9:15 Drew Right, yeah. Sounds very curious.

9:17 Adam I didn't know what it was in reference to.

9:19 Oh, yeah.

9:20 Adam Okay, so boob orgasm.

9:22 Drew You wonder if there's such a thing.

9:24 Yeah, well, I was just thinking, you know, if there is one, I want one. I don't know if I have one, and there is one, why haven't I?

9:29 Drew Well, women don't all get the same sort of sexual gear. You know, they're sort of granted a range of gear. And men all get the same equipment. And women get the different wiring and different...

9:43 Adam Women do.

9:43 Drew Yeah, women get very... Each one is quite different.

9:46 Adam Well, are you sure they're talking about a woman? Maybe it was a guy having the orgasm on the boob.

9:53 Drew No, no, no. There is such a thing.

9:55 Adam That's my thing.

9:56 Drew The women can... I know that's your thing.

9:57 Adam It's like bread and butter. So to speak. The whole... I'm known throughout the valley for that move. That's my move.

10:02 Drew The decorator move, yeah.

10:03 Adam Yeah, that's my move.

10:04 They call it the Corolla now. Well, I know things could be awesome for everybody. I mean, but... It's just like... I mean, I know nipples are really sensitive. I mean, and they rock. They're cool. But, you know, if you can actually have an orgasm... And is it like a vaginal orgasm or is it something that...

10:17 Drew Can you tell the difference? Do you have different kinds yourself?

10:21 No, no. Actually, I was kind of disappointed. I did... During the screening, I found out there are...

10:27 Drew No, no. You're reading way too many Cosmo magazines.

10:30 No, no.

10:31 Adam You're watching way too much Fox.

10:34 Drew Really? You get what you... It's all the same, basically. You can feel slightly different based on how you arrive there. And some women do have it from nipple stimulation, but that's very rare.

10:45 Oh.

10:46 Drew That's very rare. I want to know how someone from Arkansas sounds like they're from Encino.

10:52 Do what, Neil?

10:52 Drew How is that, Adam?

10:53 Adam She watches a lot of Melrose Black.

10:55 Drew I see.

10:56 No.

10:57 Drew Are you from Arkansas originally?

10:59 No, originally I'm from Missouri.

11:01 Oh, well, that explains it.

11:02 There you go. They're closer to where, you know, Brad Pitt's from, but he's funny.

11:07 Drew Do they call boob, boob, in that part of the country?

11:11 No. You want to know, honestly, I have thought it was so hilarious. I would just really love to tell people what the weirdest sexual thing I have seen here is.

11:21 Adam Well, it's here.

11:21 But it wasn't something I was involved in.

11:23 Drew Okay, you're in Arkansas.

11:25 Adam Real fast, go ahead.

11:28 Well, one of my friends went to a flea market, and they found a corn cob, and they didn't know what the corn cob was like. It was like, I don't know, in a box of crap or something. They picked up this corn cob, and there was like an electrical plug-in wire came in from the bottom out of it. I thought about Melinda into Jay Leno, but I guess it was just like an Arkansas dildo.

11:55 Adam Mrs. Lincoln's vibrator.

11:57 Yeah, I was like, oh my god, this is horrible, but it's just so funny.

12:01 Drew I think it sort of is an homage to the term corn holing, maybe.

12:07 Adam Really? Interesting. It probably originally had the kernels on it, but then when they plugged it in, it all popped off. That's a nice visual there. All right, good times. Well, as I've said many times, Drew, it takes all kinds.

12:22 Drew Yeah.

12:22 Adam You don't want to talk, Sarah?

12:23 Drew No.

12:24 Adam Let's talk to Wendy. Wendy? You're 16?

12:27 Caller Yeah.

12:28 Adam What's up?

12:29 Caller About two weeks ago, I noticed I had a sore in my neck and it was actually my lip nodes, I guess, that were in my neck. They got big and I went to the doctor and by the time I got my doctor appointment, I got a cold sore on my lip and I talked to the doctor about that as well as my lip nodes and she said that I probably had a cold or some type of an infection that didn't really take over.

12:51 Drew Well, the cold sore should cause swelling in the lymph nodes, though typically only just on the side where the cold sore is.

12:58 Adam Oh, really?

12:59 Caller Actually, that was two weeks ago and my cold sore never went away and I got more on my lips now and then I have a swollen one that's probably the size of one of those bigger marbles.

13:11 Drew This is herpes. You're describing precisely a herpes outbreak. Precisely.

13:15 Adam Do you have a boyfriend?

13:17 Caller No, but I haven't kissed a guy for a month or so.

13:20 Drew Were you out in the sun recently?

13:23 Caller No, I work inside and...

13:25 Drew Were you on a medication?

13:27 Caller No, but I try to take some Carmex and I use the Campofenic and it's painful and it's not going away.

13:34 Drew You have... it's a viral outbreak and you should go back to your doctor and talk about getting some antiviral medication.

13:40 Caller So I should talk to him about that? Because I don't want to waste a doctor trip and have them just say, Oh, it's going to go away because...

13:46 Drew Well, maybe see a dermatologist. Yeah, they might be more apt to... better equipped to deal with this for you, okay?

13:52 Adam Well, what do you mean? You're using them like a... like a football team uses timeouts. I mean, like you only get a certain amount per half. One, one, one. You shouldn't want to burn any doctor's visits.

14:02 Caller No, no, I have good... I don't have to pay anything. It's just...

14:04 I know, well, so......the hospital I go to, they just...

14:07 Caller they see you for two seconds...

14:08 Drew Yeah, they blew her off. They blew her off. They blew her off without any good information.

14:12 Adam I understand. I understand. And listen, and God bless you, because 95% of the people who take themselves into a hospital shouldn't go.

14:20 Drew Yeah, see a dermatologist. They'll be able to help you.

14:22 Caller It's really nasty and then everyone's all asking me, you know, what's bad on your lip and... I mean, it's so unfair.

14:27 Adam All right, well then go back to the doctor and see what they can do.

14:30 Drew Dermatologist, okay? But the swollen glands is just the processing of all that viral activity.

14:36 Adam It only swells on the side that you have the cold sore on?

14:39 Drew Typically, not only, but typically. But you have the thing in the middle. Yours in the middle, that's why it goes to both sides.

14:43 Guest Is there anything you can do to prevent outbreaks?

14:45 Drew Do you have herpes in the middle of your neck?

14:47 Adam I don't have anything. I don't even get any swelling on my neck.

14:50 Oh my, wait, I have a question.

14:52 Just out of curiosity.

14:53 Guest I don't mean, how, can you ever get rid of herpes once you contract them?

14:57 Drew No.

14:57 Guest So there's no way. And can you do anything to prevent yourself from having outbreaks?

15:02 Drew Yes. There's antiviral medication. And they work very well. They work very well and you can decrease the viral shedding and you can decrease the duration of the outbreaks. There's a lot of things you can do.

15:12 Adam Andrew? Yeah. You're sick, Stan?

15:15 Yeah.

15:15 Adam What's up?

15:17 Caller My phone's dying, actually.

15:18 Adam All right.

15:19 It's dying to be.

15:20 Drew Oh.

15:22 Adam That was pretty good.

15:23 Drew His question was, is there any adverse effects to drinking Robitussin to get high?

15:26 Adam It's too bad we couldn't have spoke more to young Andrew. It sounded so vibrant in the light. Yeah.

15:33 Drew Yeah.

15:34 Adam Yeah. He will be in customer service one day soon.

15:38 Drew No, he was way too nice. He really is going to be in broadcasting.

15:42 Adam Yeah. What was his question about Robitussin?

15:45 Drew Is it good for you?

15:47 Adam It's good if you have a cold, right?

15:49 Drew Yeah. We've taken enough to hallucinate. It's harmful. Yeah. All right.

15:53 Adam Is that what he was doing?

15:54 Drew Yeah.

15:54 Adam And you forget to do things like put your phone back on the goddamn charger and stuff like that. It really affects your life negatively. Yeah. Sarah?

16:03 Caller Hi.

16:04 Adam Year 20?

16:05 Guest Yes, I am.

16:06 Adam What is up?

16:08 Caller Okay.

16:08 Guest I have problems reaching orgasms when I'm with a guy, but when I masturbate, I can reach them on my own.

16:16 Drew Do you have a boyfriend?

16:19 Guest Not at the time.

16:20 Drew Have you ever had a boyfriend?

16:21 Caller Yes.

16:22 Drew When you were with a boyfriend, did you have any easier time of it?

16:25 Adam No. That's what she's saying, right?

16:27 Drew I'm asking. Listen.

16:29 Adam You mean when she has a steady relationship? Right.

16:32 Drew Is it easier?

16:34 Guest No. That's all I've had. I don't...

16:36 Drew Okay. You only have steady relationships. Okay. All right.

16:39 Guest But I don't know if this ties to it, but I heard it on an earlier show. I have dreams that my father molested me when I was little, and things have always been awkward between us, and I'm wondering if that has anything to do with it.

16:56 Drew If it actually happened and your dad maybe has some issues emotionally that make you feel strange around him, who he's intruded upon or that he's-

17:06 Adam You think there's, we talk about that all the time, like is it valid? Well, it's just a dream, but you never had a dream you did anything weird with your mom, did you, Drew?

17:14 Drew No.

17:14 Adam I had one about your mom. I talked to her at your party for a while. She was all drunk. She's telling me about the old days. But yeah, it was just one. I mean, it was nothing almost, but the point is she's an attractive older lady. Here's what I'm saying. You wouldn't have that dream. Would you have that dream if nothing ever happened? Would it be just too weird?

17:36 Drew It seems to me.

17:37 Adam I don't know.

17:37 Drew My sort of feeling is if somebody wasn't, isn't carrying the trauma or evidence of trauma and just a dream, I'm not apt to sort of put a lot of emphasis on that. On the other hand, if there's something weird in that relationship with dad, that he's giving her those feelings, that she's feeling uncomfortable and goes back and dreams about it, that's a problem.

17:56 Adam Right. All right.

17:57 Drew It can be just on a non-conscious sort of relationship level.

18:02 Adam Sarah?

18:03 Caller Sarah?

18:04 Adam Sarah?

18:06 Guest Yes.

18:06 Adam Call her Sarah? Whatever your name is? Or whatever your real name is?

18:10 Guest No, I can hear you, but I can't. Sorry.

18:13 Adam Okay. So you don't have a boyfriend right now?

18:17 Guest No, I don't.

18:17 Drew But you've been able to have stable relationships? Yes. That by itself sort of mitigates against the probability that you've got a baby.

18:25 Adam Most 20-year-old women have a little difficulty with the orgasm anyway. I mean, judging from my experience, it's about 110, 120 percent. Maybe 130. What does it go up to?

18:36 Drew Does it go up?

18:37 Adam How much past 100 percent can you go with?

18:40 Drew In your fieldwork?

18:41 Adam Yeah. I mean, I've done some sampling. I've done some studying. I'm known for a few things around the valley.

18:46 Drew And when you sample and they get up and run, that sort of goes over 100 percent.

18:49 Adam It's hard to have an orgasm when you're fleeing, I've found. A lot of women have trouble when they're running, having orgasms. But yeah, sir, you're fine. Don't freak out. Get the guy. How many times you got to punch out Mike a show? I mean, how consistent is that? Once good. Once good. All right. Hey, Sarah, have the guy give you some oral sex. How's that work on you?

19:14 Guest Okay.

19:14 Adam Is that good?

19:16 Guest Yeah.

19:16 Adam Do you like that?

19:18 Guest Well, yeah. It's just sometimes I don't feel anything. Then maybe he doesn't do anything.

19:24 Adam Well, maybe he's in the kitchen or something. You mean when he's down there?

19:29 Guest Yeah. Or even when we're having sex, like the first time I had sex.

19:32 Drew We don't like that.

19:33 Adam That's bad. Yeah.

19:34 Drew We consider that sort of a bad thing.

19:36 Adam Yeah. That's bad. Like the guy's actually having intercourse with you and you don't feel anything.

19:41 Drew You literally feel nothing.

19:43 Adam That's bad.

19:44 Guest But sometimes I do. Other times it's like friction, but that's it.

19:50 Adam Maybe there's something here. What kind of guy is your dad?

19:54 Guest What do you mean?

19:55 Drew Is he an alcoholic, drug addict, metal worker?

19:58 Guest Yeah. No. He does drink a lot and we always talk to him about that.

20:04 Caller So it's possible when he was a depressed person.

20:07 Drew Well, all alcoholics are depressed, but the problem is that he may have been drunk and did something to you, he was sort of in a blackout or God knows what.

20:14 Adam What about your mom's folks and her dad, grandpa?

20:18 Guest No. Grandpa died when my mom was really little.

20:22 Adam Yeah. Does she have a weird stepdaddy or something like that?

20:25 Guest No. Nothing like that.

20:28 Adam What's your dad do for a living?

20:30 Guest He works at a brewery, actually. He does?

20:33 Adam That's a good novelty job for a guy who drinks a lot. It really is. It's almost funny. Like, you can't quit drinking now. He works at a brewery.

20:43 Drew It's a comedy job.

20:44 Guest Yeah.

20:44 Adam It's like the punch line. Yeah.

20:47 Guest I don't know if this is anything important, but I recently moved. Well, right after I graduated, I moved to Arizona. And then he was really crying and he was really sensitive about that. And then I moved back. Who? I'm moving back out there. My dad. And he just gets really upset about that more so than anybody in my family.

21:06 Drew About you moving around.

21:08 Guest Yeah. And I'm just wondering, this is so weird.

21:11 Drew There's something intrusive about your relationship with that. Whether or not he physically violated and intruded or just emotionally intruded, there's something kind of not right there.

21:19 Adam Well, also, I mean, can you just imagine having that kind of relationship with either one of your parents, where it's like, I don't know where the guy's coming from. I'm not sure if he did this. Like, you go, what do you think he could have molested you? And you go.

21:33 Guest But it's not such an uncomfortable thing.

21:35 Adam Yeah, I don't know.

21:36 Guest Maybe it's not a good sign.

21:37 Adam That's a weird thing when it's like a coin toss, whether your dad would touch you sexually or not. That's not a ringing endorsement for a great parent. Right.

21:49 Drew Whether you did it or not. It doesn't matter.

21:51 Adam Just the fact that you're not sure. Like we go, do you think he's capable of doing something like that to you? And they go, you know, if he was drinking pretty good, you know, that's pretty good looking eight year old. Where's my bourbon? He may have made a move. Sure. He's only human. I mean, that's just weird. I mean, no wonder she's all confused and spinning around. All right. So what should she do?

22:14 Drew Well, what?

22:16 Guest How do you approach that situation?

22:18 Drew Therapy?

22:20 Adam Don't go to a psychic or anything weird and don't go to a hypnotist.

22:23 Drew We kind of told her just to settle down and not worry about it. That's kind of we're still in that school of thought.

22:28 Adam Grab a little therapy while you're relaxing.

22:30 Drew If she had relationships, just be careful about who she chooses to be with and kind of work with someone who cares about her and try to work with your partner on getting yourself to respond.

22:39 Adam A little therapy wouldn't hurt.

22:40 Drew Would help a lot possibly.

22:41 Adam Wouldn't hurt anybody, right?

22:43 Drew Right.

22:43 Adam And listen, a little therapy, it's like an oil change. Like, I don't know, if you change your oil 10 feet ago or 10 million miles ago, even if it was just 10 feet ago, it wouldn't hurt, would it? Yeah, it couldn't be too bad. Couldn't hurt. All right, let's take ourselves a little break. Jena and Shuri are both here from Roswell. Nine o'clock, who's the next? WB? You can. You can. Drew, did I do that last time you were here?

23:09 Drew Like, every time. Yeah.

23:11 Adam I'm gonna correct that next, when we come back, I'm gonna overcompensate for more plugs. And when we come back, Drew, who are we talking to?

23:17 Drew Justin.

23:18 Adam Justin, his girlfriend dumped him because he was on Loveline last night. Oh, with the shaved pubes. That'll be good after this. Hey, everybody. You know what I'm saying? Hey, Loveline. I'm Adam. That's the mic punching Dr. Drew. Nobody has dealt out more. Mike Tyson hasn't dealt out the kind of abuse that Dr. Drew does when it comes to punching that mic. Yeah, it's no longer Mike. It's become a speed bag for Dr. Drew to work out on. Shiri Appleby and Jena Malone are both here, both on Roswell. You, P, what?

23:59 Guest Jena's on Roswell.

24:00 Guest I'm not on Roswell.

24:00 Guest We're just friends.

24:01 Guest But I'm a fan.

24:02 Adam Anderson, Anderson, put those headphones down and come in here. All right. Yeah, Jena not on Roswell, right?

24:10 Guest Jena not on Roswell, Shiri on Roswell.

24:12 Adam Thank you. Thank you very much. Anderson is such a...

24:15 Guest We meant to...

24:16 Adam It's my fault.

24:17 Can I just defend myself for one moment?

24:19 Guest Just one second.

24:21 Adam Please just do a reenactment of what happened five minutes before the show started.

24:27 Drew Anne was outside the room.

24:28 Adam Forget about Anne. You were completely confused as usual.

24:31 And you said, now, who are these girls both from Roswell? And as far as I had known, yes.

24:36 Adam I said, is Jena from Roswell with a curious, slightly suspicious tone?

24:43 I didn't detect any of that at all.

24:45 Adam Well, I said, are both these girls from Roswell? And I said, yes. And then I said it again. I said it again. I said, did you shut up? Shut up.

24:56 Drew Hey, come on.

24:57 Adam Shut his mic.

24:57 Drew Let's go. Here we go. Where'd you guys meet?

25:00 Guest We met through a friend.

25:01 Adam Drew, why do you, why did you shut up? We're trying to do a show here. I'm arguing with Anderson here on the air.

25:08 Guest Oh, sorry.

25:08 Adam Sorry.

25:09 Drew I'm sorry. I didn't know that was the show. It was back off. Well, I would love to hear how the girls met. That's what I want to know.

25:15 Adam Drew, your every instinct you have is heinous. Go ahead, please.

25:21 Guest We met randomly through a friend of mine that I worked with, but mostly we got to know each other when we went backpacking through Europe together.

25:29 Drew The camping reference, Adam.

25:31 Adam I stopped listening to her.

25:35 Guest We went backpacking through Europe this summer for two weeks.

25:37 Adam Really?

25:38 Drew Somebody hooked you two up to go?

25:39 Guest No, we just met. We were like, all right, we want to go. Well, you go with me and she came.

25:46 Guest We like met in London. It was fun. Wow.

25:48 Caller That was crazy.

25:49 Adam If you're actually backpacking, you just carry a backpack like another four seasons.

25:53 Guest Backpacking, hostiling, sleeping on trains. Really?

25:55 Guest Yeah.

25:56 Guest Waking up in new cities every day. It was so fun. We went for two weeks.

25:58 Guest We had a blast.

25:59 Guest Totally.

25:59 Drew Where are you from originally?

26:01 Guest I'm from California.

26:03 Guest Lake Tahoe area.

26:05 Adam You just had that discussion.

26:07 Guest I know. I was going to say.

26:08 Adam All right. I'm still mad though. Justin?

26:12 Guest Sorry.

26:12 Adam You're 18? No, nothing. You guys are fine. You guys are fine. I'm mad at Drew for interrupting my argument with Anderson. Justin? Yeah. What's up?

26:22 Caller I called him last night about shaving my pubes with the Mach 3.

26:25 Adam Right.

26:26 You're gay.

26:27 Caller Yeah. One of her friends found out and...

26:31 Drew Whose friends? Whose friends? One of her friends? Yeah. Who's her?

26:36 Caller My girlfriend's friend.

26:38 Drew Okay.

26:39 Caller And...

26:39 Drew Your girlfriend's friend heard the show?

26:42 Caller Yeah. She was listening to the show last night and she came up to me before school and, I don't know, asked me about it. And, I mean, I didn't think anything of it so I told her that it was true or whatever and then all of a sudden rumors spread around and my girlfriend came back to me and she felt me.

26:58 Adam Now, why?

27:00 Caller I don't... Just peer pressure or whatever.

27:02 Adam She didn't know your pubes were shaved?

27:04 Caller No, I've only been going out with her for like three weeks.

27:07 Adam Did she say that's the reason she dumped you?

27:10 Caller No, she gave me other stuff but I mean all her friends came up to me and told me.

27:14 Adam Well, what reason did she give you?

27:16 Caller She said that I just wasn't her type and stuff like that.

27:20 Drew No, what stuff like that? What did she tell you?

27:22 Caller She said that I wasn't her type because I was always hanging out with my friends and I didn't have enough time for her and just... she said we weren't compatible or...

27:32 Drew And then what did her friends say?

27:34 Caller They all told me, they just kept on coming up to me telling me like, asking me questions about it, saying it was weird or whatever.

27:41 Drew Hmm. Do you think she was just weirded out by the whole call?

27:44 Caller Yeah.

27:45 Caller Well, I think that she just got a whole bunch of peer pressure from her friends that they all thought it was gross.

27:51 Caller So she ended up...

27:53 Drew That sometimes makes things even better for you. You know what I'm saying? When people tell you not to do something.

27:58 Adam She wasn't that into you.

27:59 Caller Yeah. That's what I was kind of figuring. But my main...

28:03 Adam She never saw your shaved pubes either, right?

28:05 Caller No.

28:06 Adam So how close could you guys have been?

28:09 Caller Well, we had made out a couple of times, but...

28:12 Adam Maybe she wasn't even your girlfriend.

28:14 Caller Well, no, she was, because I asked her out on Halloween.

28:17 Adam Oh, well, you guys collected candy together. That's something different. I wasn't aware of that.

28:25 Caller I was just wondering if, Dr. Drew, if there was anything that I can do to either help the hair grow faster or get rid of the red bumps or just anything like that.

28:36 Adam What about some Rogaine rubbed in on the nards, here, Drew?

28:39 Drew The hair will not grow back any faster, by any means I know of.

28:43 Caller Nothing you can eat or... No.

28:45 Adam Well, what if you ate hair? Wouldn't that help? I mean, just your common logic would suggest that if you ate pubic hair...

28:53 Drew Don't people apply logic, similar logic, about the colon and the bow and the...

28:58 Caller Where am I going to get that, though? I don't have any.

29:00 Adam You don't have any pubes? What about your underarms?

29:02 Caller No, I'm not very hairy underneath my underarms.

29:04 Adam Well, certainly there's something. What about your dad? You could collect something from his razor.

29:11 Caller I don't think that would go too well with him.

29:13 Drew He doesn't have to know. The terms of the infection, physohex scrub, antibacterial scrub is a good idea.

29:20 Adam And that oxy-10 works good.

29:22 Drew I don't know about that area though. It could be a little tough on him.

29:24 Adam Why not? Put it on.

29:25 Drew Not on the nuts. Maybe on the pubic area.

29:26 Adam Well, not on the nuts. Yeah, put it up top. The nut. Well, first off, who's going to notice hair missing from the nuts? You guys wouldn't miss hair on nuts, would you?

29:34 Guest That always gives me the giggles.

29:36 Adam It is funny, isn't it? No, balls is better, I think.

29:38 Drew Well, he used ball sack last night. That got out of the way.

29:41 Guest That's okay, but I just find the other one to be so ridiculous.

29:43 Adam The nuts?

29:44 Caller Yes.

29:45 Adam Stop it.

29:45 No, oh my God.

29:47 Adam You mean when I say nuts?

29:49 Guest Yeah, it's just like that. It's crazy.

29:51 Adam Look, you guys, you wouldn't miss hair from nuts. You wouldn't be like, where's the hair?

29:57 Guest No, you're not going to miss the hair, period. No, I mean, listen, if you're with someone, it's like if they do that and you shave something and something doesn't grow back for a while, you just sort of deal with it. It's something that's going to grow back eventually. It's just...

30:09 Drew Well, you agree with Adam that she just wasn't that into him.

30:12 Guest Yeah, I mean, it must have been. I mean, it's kind of a horrible excuse.

30:15 Drew Or a bogus call, which is the more likely thing.

30:18 Adam When women are into a guy, they never dump them, no matter what they do, they got to F up royally.

30:24 Drew Even then, they're more locked in. Right, now they got a project.

30:28 Guest High school's so much about peer pressure, if everyone's like, oh, it's weird, of course they're going to break up with it. I think. Yeah, and go away from it.

30:36 Adam Do guys have peer... I don't notice, I never noticed any peer pressure as a guy.

30:40 Drew Guys, if the pressure comes in the form of physical violence, somebody likes to just kick your crap out of you and tell you...

30:46 Adam Right, he called you a pussy, go hit him, or yeah, drink this beer, and like do the drugs and all that. Yeah, I did vomit a few times. Melissa?

30:55 Yes?

30:56 Adam Hey, I've actually vomited from booze, I would say...

30:59 Caller Adam?

31:00 Adam 65, 70 times. Yep.

31:01 Caller Adam?

31:02 Adam Yeah.

31:03 Caller Oh my God.

31:04 Adam What's happening?

31:05 Caller Nothing, I was just talking to that lady and I love her.

31:08 Drew The, our screener?

31:09 Caller Yes.

31:10 Drew Oh, good.

31:11 Caller She's a dynamite lady. Can you guys hear me?

31:14 Drew We gotcha.

31:15 Caller Okay, I don't want to, I'm on my cordless, so I didn't want to lose you.

31:18 Drew Okay, what's up?

31:19 Caller Well, I'm Melissa, I'm from Spout Lake Tahoe. And first, I guess I have to give my comment.

31:26 Adam All right.

31:27 Caller Adam?

31:27 Adam Yeah?

31:28 Caller My brother called last week and he was the one that was in love with his best friend's girlfriend.

31:34 Adam Right.

31:35 Caller And I want to let you know that they are in love.

31:38 Adam Well, that's good.

31:39 Caller Yeah, I guess.

31:40 Adam What did we tell him to do?

31:42 Caller What?

31:43 Adam What did we tell him to do?

31:45 Caller Well, you told him to go for it.

31:47 Adam I did.

31:48 Caller But Dr. Drew was like, you know, oh my God, no.

31:51 Adam Yeah. Well, don't listen to Drew. I think that's the lesson.

31:53 Caller I did meet her and she's a very nice woman.

31:55 Drew What happened to his best friend?

31:57 Caller Well, I still see him. He still gives him a ride to school. So I guess, you know, however that works. But I'm older than him, but I'm so excited.

32:08 Drew All right.

32:08 Adam So what's up?

32:09 Caller Well, I had a personal problem, but you're a lesbian. Yeah. Well, I have. Well, I'm 25, right? And my boyfriend, he just turned 40 in December. All right. He's going to be 41.

32:23 Adam You know, we'll do the math.

32:25 Drew You just, you just turned 40 in December. Well, we worked together. He'll turn 41 next December. And 42 is December after that.

32:31 Adam Hold on. But I'm still, there's still some confusion about the third December. Is it going to be 44 or 43?

32:38 Caller No, he'll be 41 this December.

32:40 Adam It'll be 41 in 2001. Yes. So 42 then 202.

32:46 Drew And 43, 203. Yeah.

32:47 Adam 43 on three. Okay.

32:49 Drew I'm working it out. Wait, can you carry it out from there?

32:51 Adam I got it.

32:52 Drew I got it. I got it.

32:53 Caller I know. And Dr. Drew is like so like good on this, but I've never been able to orgasm. And I have been with a woman for the last four years. And I've been having a lesbian.

33:06 Adam You've been with a woman for the last four years.

33:08 Caller Yes. The last four years. We have a son together and he's eight months.

33:13 Adam You, you and the woman?

33:14 Caller Well, no, no, no. Me and the guy that I work with have been together.

33:21 Adam Hold on a second.

33:22 Drew Where's my wallet?

33:23 Adam I got to put her on hold because it's more confusing when she's talking. Who has she been with for the last four years? This guy or been with a woman?

33:30 Guest She's been with a woman for the last four years, but now she's been with this guy for the past four months, and she has a baby with him? Is that what?

33:38 Adam I can't figure out where they get this going.

33:39 Guest Baby eight months old.

33:41 Guest Oh, well, then maybe not.

33:42 Adam She said, I've been with a woman for the last four years. We have a son together. He's eight months old.

33:47 And then someone from work.

33:49 Adam The guy, the guy. The guy she's dating is the guy from work.

33:51 Yeah.

33:52 Adam I'm thinking. All right. Let's sort through this. Melissa?

33:56 Yes.

33:56 Adam In aunt two, he'll be 41?

33:59 Yes.

34:00 Adam Okay.

34:01 Drew And the baby will be?

34:02 Adam 44.

34:03 Caller No, the baby will just be one, one years old.

34:07 Adam I'm confused now.

34:08 Drew No, it doesn't matter.

34:09 Adam In December?

34:10 Caller No, he will be 41 in December.

34:13 Drew But the baby?

34:14 Caller The baby will be one in March.

34:16 Drew March. There we go. Eight month old now.

34:18 Adam All right.

34:19 Caller He's eight month old now.

34:20 Adam I see.

34:21 Caller And.

34:22 Adam All right. Now, this guy you work with?

34:24 Caller Yes, I do.

34:25 Adam And you have a child with him and in that it's his child too?

34:30 Caller Yes.

34:30 Adam And what about the lesbian relationship you were in?

34:33 Caller Well, he had a really hard time with it and I left him. I left him. I had first gotten pregnant and I left him and I went back with her and I just couldn't do it. You know, like, but I just don't. I never have an orgasm with a man.

34:52 Adam And you say you were with. How long have you been with him total?

34:56 Caller I had only been with him for like three months before I got pregnant.

35:01 Adam OK, but just don't don't give us the pregnant math. Just tell us how long like you're with him two years ago or.

35:07 Caller Oh, yes. Yes, he's eight months. So it's been about 16 months.

35:12 Drew OK, she was with him.

35:13 Adam We got to get like a Chinese guy with an abacus in here. So the hell is going on.

35:18 Caller He was very new.

35:20 Drew OK. And dad questions.

35:21 Adam And you were you were with the girlfriend while you're with him. Yes, I was cheating on him.

35:28 Caller Yeah.

35:28 Adam So he wasn't aware of this.

35:30 Caller No.

35:30 Adam And how often were you with this girlfriend?

35:33 Well.

35:35 Adam All the time.

35:36 Caller Quite. Yeah.

35:37 Drew Does he know now?

35:39 Caller No, it was all the time.

35:41 Adam All the time. I guess as he is a guy, I mean, he's really mad. You can really you can really pull it off because then they're not going to suspect. As a matter of fact, most guys and Drew will never admit this because his wife listens to his show. But you, your old lady and her friend want to hit the mall or go camping or get the hell out of Dodge for a couple of days. You can be happier.

35:59 Caller Yeah, he never thought of anything.

36:01 Drew Right, and you said now he's mad. Yeah, now he's mad.

36:04 Caller Now he knows, he knows now.

36:05 Drew And he's mad.

36:06 Caller Yeah, I live in a really small town. So he definitely he knows.

36:11 Adam Okay, and and you can't know what about when he does the oral sex, you don't don't have the organ.

36:19 Caller He doesn't and he was married.

36:21 Drew Hold on, slow down, slow down, slow down. He's still married?

36:25 Caller Yes, he is.

36:26 Drew Oh, my God.

36:27 Caller Yeah, he's still married up here and they have a son.

36:30 Adam Listen, I get a family of raccoons strung out on speed would do a better job with this kid of yours.

36:37 Caller I've never I've never had a problem with her and I've actually never even met her.

36:42 Drew You're lesbian.

36:43 Caller The wife, his wife. Yeah.

36:48 Adam You got to laugh at a certain point, don't you?

36:50 Guest I'm laughing now and I'm trying to explain it.

36:52 Adam Well, but I mean, so this guy's mad about your lesbian tryst, but meanwhile, he's married.

37:00 Caller Yeah.

37:00 Adam Ann has a kid. Ann has a kid.

37:03 Caller Yeah, they have an older son. He's almost my age.

37:06 Adam Well, somebody has a kid with you and he's married, right?

37:10 Drew What does this man do for a living?

37:12 Caller He's my chief engineer for a hotel.

37:17 Adam Wow. I like this. White guy?

37:20 Caller Yeah.

37:21 Adam Wow. It's not common white guy activity. I don't care about these kind of things.

37:25 Caller What?

37:26 Adam Starting a family outside of the family while the family's going on. Yeah.

37:30 Caller Yeah.

37:30 Adam Interesting. I like to party with this guy. Do you want him to break up with his wife?

37:37 Caller Well, you know, as far as I understand, that they have totally split up and that was a totally different thing. Like, I've seen the bills and he still pays like half of everything and he tells me about it, but.

37:48 Adam Don't you guys live together?

37:51 Caller Actually, no, not right now.

37:53 Adam OK, so look, this guy's a world class jackass.

37:58 Drew Yeah.

37:58 Adam As far as I can tell. So why don't you just cut him? Just cut him. Yeah, he's an idiot.

38:05 Caller You really think so?

38:06 Adam Of course. I know he's an idiot. But you wouldn't have been attracted to him if he wasn't an idiot.

38:12 Caller I guess that's true.

38:12 Adam He's got to be an idiot. Is your dad an idiot?

38:15 Drew Yes. Oh, yes.

38:16 Adam Of course.

38:16 Drew A colossal, translucent idiot.

38:20 Adam Your dad is the king of all jackasses.

38:22 Caller Yeah.

38:23 Adam Yes, you should wear a crown of ass with thorns around it.

38:28 Caller Now, why are you being so nice now? I thought you were totally on their side.

38:32 Adam I hate your dad, that's why, for how he scrambled your radar growing up. What did he do to you? Who is that?

38:40 Caller Oh, my brother.

38:41 Adam What did your dad do to you growing up?

38:43 Drew Melissa?

38:44 Caller Well, no, this is not my real dad. It's my stepdad.

38:46 Adam What did he do?

38:47 Drew Which dad screwed you up? What did he do to you?

38:49 Caller My stepdad never did anything to me. He totally pervaded me.

38:53 Drew What did your dad do?

38:54 Adam We're not interested in talking about the dad who was good to you. I want to talk about the bad dad.

38:57 Drew What did he do to you?

38:58 Caller I was really young.

38:59 Drew What did he do to you?

39:00 Caller He don't count.

39:01 Drew What did he do to you?

39:04 Caller He was never there.

39:06 Drew Let's be very clear about this. For everyone listening, everyone with the sound of my voice, your brain is like putty the younger you are. The least you remember it, the more plastic and more permanent and more profound the change on your brain structure and function.

39:22 Caller So, Dr. Drew, is that I have kids. I have two kids.

39:26 Adam No, two kids.

39:28 Caller I mean, they're perfect.

39:29 Caller Oh, I know that.

39:31 Adam They were. They were, then you got to them.

39:34 Caller They are just like, I mean, they are absolutely perfect. So, for me to like, you know, like bring stuff like that up.

39:41 Adam Okay. So, what did your dad do? Did he molest you?

39:45 Caller Yeah, he did.

39:46 Adam All right. You know, look. All right.

39:48 Drew Hold on.

39:49 Adam We got to wrap this call. Melissa. Listen.

39:51 Drew We knew it the moment you started talking.

39:53 Adam Let me just yell at Melissa for one second. Melissa, here's the deal. You are going to screw those kids up. Do you hear me?

40:00 Caller No.

40:01 Adam Yes.

40:02 Caller You have to.

40:03 Adam You have to. You can't help it.

40:05 Caller Dr. Drew.

40:06 Adam Don't. Drew's on my side a thousand percent.

40:08 Caller No, he's not. Because I can't help it.

40:09 Adam He's giving me a BJ right now. He knows I'm so right. Listen to me. You get yourself some help.

40:15 Drew Yeah.

40:16 Adam You go to some therapy. You do your work. You stop hanging around with these degenerate guys. You're going to screw your kiddies up. Do you hear me? I'm going to do it. That's it.

40:24 Drew That's it.

40:25 Adam Now you have to be responsible, mama.

40:27 Drew It's not perfect.

40:27 Adam You can't hang around with jokers anymore.

40:29 Drew It's not perfect. You've got jokers in your life. You are damaging the kids when you do that.

40:34 Adam How people think they can be just almost insane and not affect their kids in any negative way. We talk to these people all night. It's like, yeah, we're swingers. We're having threesomes and we're smoking crack out of an eight-man hookah. But no, they never see it. They never see it, but they live with this person. It's strung out. Swingin mom is mom. Not only mom is king, is president, is god, is everything, is principal, is boss, is everything. I mean, when you're eight months old, when you're three years old, when you're whatever.

41:10 Guest It's a job that they don't make you take a class. It's the only thing.

41:13 Adam Oh, it sickens me. Wait till my mandatory sterilization program comes in.

41:18 Wait till that.

41:19 Adam Wait till that. All right, Shiri and Jenner are both here. Not both from Roswell, apparently.

41:25 Whatever.

41:27 Adam We'll take ourselves a little break. We'll be right back. Hey, it's Love Line, everybody. I'm Adam Carolla, that is Dr. Drew over there. Shiri Appleby and Jena Malone both here. Shiri was on a couple months ago, it seems like, not too long ago, from Roswell, UPN, 9 o'clock, Tuesday nights. Jena has done a whole bunch of movies, including Donnie Darko, which is out now, but Stepmom and For the Love of the Game, and Contact and what else coming up? Can we see you?

42:09 The man who wasn't there?

42:12 Guest No, but that's a really good friend of mine. Scarlett Johansson is in that. She's really good, but now there's this thing called Life is a House.

42:20 Adam Oh, yeah.

42:21 Guest Dangerous Lives of Ultra Boys.

42:24 Adam Life is a House is getting some pretty good notices, right? I mean, they think it's gonna be like an Academy Award or two given there.

42:31 Guest I don't know about that.

42:34 Adam Kevin Kline?

42:35 Guest Yeah, Kevin Kline is really, really great in it.

42:37 Drew He's amazing.

42:39 Guest He's just the person is so amazing. I am just blown away by him and so many different aspects of him.

42:46 Adam He's one of these guys. It's hard now to find... I'm trying to think, maybe Johnny Depp is this way. There's a couple of guys where if they're in the movie, you know they're gonna be good and you assume the movie's gonna be pretty solid too.

43:01 Guest Because their choices are really interesting, usually anyways.

43:04 Adam Right, right. I don't know how many other guys you can see that for. Johnny Depp's like one of the only guys I can think of.

43:12 Drew The thing about Kevin Klein is you may be laughing out loud too. I mean he may make you laugh.

43:16 Guest Yeah, totally. He's not afraid of doing that as well, you know.

43:20 Adam Yeah, he's one of those talented, nice, good-looking guys you just hate.

43:25 Drew You know Larry from Three's Company?

43:27 Adam Who? Larry from Three's Company?

43:30 Drew That's his brother. Which one is Larry?

43:33 Adam He's a sleazy friend, Jack's sleazy friend. That is Klein's brother. Yeah, that guy's name is Klein. Is it Richard Klein? What the hell is his name? No, that's from Survivor. What's Larry's? What's that guy's name?

43:46 Drew I know who you're talking about.

43:48 Adam Well, if Drew knows who we're talking about, then he's a household name. Tony?

43:52 Caller Yeah.

43:53 Adam You're 26?

43:54 Caller Hey.

43:56 Caller I got a couple of questions, Dr. Drew. I got, I have, I started like Coke, well, actually I started by when I was like 13. I got a Coke problem. I went to rehab. The guy asked me if I ever was in rehab. I went to rehab, got out. I wasn't like ready to quit. A couple years ago, about four years ago, my aunt died and left me like 200 grand. I spent like 160 grand on, I got into heroin. I spent like 160 grand on it in the last like four years. I started shooting it like over a year ago. Okay.

44:27 Drew What's the question?

44:29 Caller One is, you mentioned a couple of weeks ago that your veins aren't collapsed. They're clogged. Can I get them back if I kick?

44:38 Drew You might form new ones. Some of them do re-canalize. Yeah.

44:41 Adam Well, he's 26. That's better.

44:43 Drew That should be the least of your concerns.

44:45 Caller All right.

44:46 Drew You there?

44:47 Caller I'm not going to answer that call. Two, methadone.

44:51 Drew Yeah.

44:52 Caller Way harder to kick?

44:53 Drew Way harder to kick.

44:54 Caller Well, what the hell is the point, then?

44:56 Drew Well, see, you don't-

44:57 Caller Isn't it better just to go cold?

44:58 Drew Oh, yeah. It's way better to go cold. But the problem with heroin is staying off heroin, and the detox is no big deal. It's not a big problem. What? Are you kidding? It's not that big a deal.

45:08 Adam Listen, don't say that.

45:09 Drew No, it's not that big a deal.

45:10 Adam You always say that. It freaks people out. Dude. Tony, look.

45:13 Caller It's like the hardest thing I've ever...

45:15 Adam Fine. Spend some of that money on a good program.

45:19 Drew You need to spend a few months in a rehab. You do.

45:21 Caller I don't have insurance right now.

45:23 Drew You have $60,000, right?

45:25 Caller Yeah, but I'm not going to go waste that on insurance.

45:27 Drew You've already wasted $140,000 on something that's going to kill you. The problem with heroin is that you keep sure that you will die. Very simple.

45:33 Caller I've never even come close to odine, though.

45:36 Drew You don't die of odine.

45:37 Caller What?

45:37 Drew You die of the diseases that are caused by shooting things into your veins. Your kidneys will fail. You'll have strokes. Your heart will give out.

45:44 Caller When I went in to methadone, they told me I had an accelerated liver count or something.

45:49 Drew Yeah, you probably have hepatitis C. I mean, you will die of heroin. Period. You will die. Methadone prevents you from dying. And to that extent, methadone is a good thing. Yeah, but it makes you...

45:57 Caller I mean, you've got to go every day. It's the same thing.

45:59 Drew Well, you won't die. But it's a chronic illness.

46:02 Adam Tony, what do you want to do? Sprinkle you with pixie dust?

46:05 Caller Yeah.

46:06 Adam I mean, Jesus Christ, buddy, you've got a problem, okay?

46:10 Caller All right. Maintenance versus...

46:12 Drew Maintenance, which is sort of a chronic state of illness, it's much milder, versus cure. And your choice is yours, but the road to recovery is treacherous and difficult and hard work, painful, takes a long time, but is a wonderful place once you get there.

46:29 Adam Tony, I hate to say, but does not sound like he's anywhere close to quitting at this point.

46:35 Drew No, he's not really.

46:36 Adam It just doesn't, I mean, it just doesn't sound like, it sounds like he's going to quit three times and hopefully not die somewhere along that road before he kicks for good. He just doesn't seem open to it. But look, if you're going to squander that 60 grand shooting it, you might as well spend 10 of it and get in some kind of program and get off this crap.

46:59 Drew He could be treated easily, he could get three months of treatment for $10,000.

47:03 Adam Oh yeah?

47:04 Drew Easily.

47:04 Adam I could do it for $8,500. Come on over. I'll set you up. It's a lot of TV dinners, Drew. There's Mountain Dew, TV dinners, and constant conversation from the face girl over here. I'll get him to kick.

47:16 Caller Yeah.

47:17 Drew I'm going to take up heroin.

47:18 Adam Let me tell you about high school football, son. All right. We'll take a little break.

47:24 Drew Where's my rig?

47:25 Adam We'll be right back. Hey, everybody, loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew over there. This is my theme song, right?

47:52 Drew You guys like this? This is Adam. Adam, describe your entrance.

47:56 Adam I see myself walking into a club in slow motion with the jacket flung over the shoulder, wearing the glasses, but I slide them down because I get that, you know, wind blowing, slow motion, through the hair, and people recognize me and I give a nod. Well, the thumbs up is a little too much of a movement for me, but just over the glasses, that knowing look, and a lot of ladies.

48:21 Drew And ladies, see if this isn't what you hear.

48:25 Guest Yeah, it's pretty much what I see. It's a great description of what I see.

48:30 Guest That's great.

48:32 Adam Thank you. Jena and Sherry are both here. Sherry is from, thank you, Roswell, UPN on nine o'clock Tuesday nights, is when you can find it. And Jena, you can find on Donnie Darko, which is currently out.

48:52 Drew I guess I forgot to see that. Anderson does not endorse films easily.

48:56 Adam Anderson is- It's great.

48:57 Drew It's like you talking about a comedian positively.

48:59 Adam Anderson-

49:00 Drew Really?

49:00 Guest That's crazy.

49:01 Adam Yeah.

49:01 Drew I've never heard you. Have you ever talked about a comedian?

49:03 Guest That's awesome.

49:04 Adam Well, I talk about myself in a positive light.

49:06 Drew That's what I'm talking about.

49:08 Adam Is that what you mean?

49:08 Drew That's what I mean.

49:09 Adam Okay. Anderson, who's an aficionado of films and a snob on top of that, saw it twice. So you know it's gotta have some-

49:19 Drew And Carrie, don't call me Tara. I like you too.

49:21 Adam Wow.

49:21 Drew Wow. Did you say your side?

49:23 Caller You're too stupid.

49:25 Adam Serena?

49:26 Drew Oh, Damien's side.

49:28 Adam Serena, you're 20.

49:29 Guest I'm 20.

49:30 Adam What's up?

49:32 Guest I'm calling because two days ago, one of my best friends asked me if I would be in a threesome with her and her baby daddy, her live-in boyfriend. I've been in a threesome before, so it's not necessarily that.

49:47 Drew How'd that one turn out?

49:48 Guest That was fine. It was interesting.

49:51 Adam Which one were you? You weren't the girlfriend, and you were just the third party?

49:55 Guest No, it was actually two people that I didn't really know.

50:00 Adam How'd you get into that one?

50:02 Guest Kind of friends of friends and a little too much alcohol.

50:05 Drew How did that turn out for you?

50:07 Guest That was fine. It was weird at first, but by the end of it, it was fine. But this one, I really don't want to do it because it's my best friend and they have a kid together.

50:22 Adam The kid doesn't have to be involved sexually. Can't they just hang out and give you a towel or something?

50:27 Guest Or a video camera or something.

50:29 Drew Serena has some boundaries and some judgment. That's good. Okay, so what's the problem?

50:34 Guest Because now I feel guilty both ways because...

50:38 Drew Oh, please. Oh, please.

50:39 Adam You don't want to let him know.

50:40 Drew You know what, Adam, I need to find my...

50:41 Adam It's not like she's asking you to help her move or something.

50:44 Drew I need to find my righteous indignation again. This is sick.

50:49 Guest I told her, no, that I didn't feel comfortable because they have kids and because she is in love with him, supposedly, so I didn't feel comfortable with that.

50:57 Drew He's a dick because he's using the fact that she's in love with him to manipulate her into this thing. You're going to get in the middle of something that's going to break down. It's going to be a disaster for you.

51:06 Adam Are you just like a vagina for hire, by the way?

51:10 Guest Yeah, you know.

51:10 Drew Not for hire. It's sort of like what?

51:13 Guest A rental.

51:15 Drew Where are you?

51:17 Guest No, and so I told them no, but they won't stop hounding me and how do I keep my friendship and keep my dignity and keep out of it? Because I don't want to do it.

51:26 Adam Let me ask a couple of questions. Are you attracted to the guy?

51:30 Guest No, not really.

51:32 Drew That's the other.

51:32 Guest I see him as like, I see him as her boyfriend. I don't see him as anything.

51:36 Adam Are you attracted to her?

51:38 Guest No.

51:40 Drew So, really, this is-

51:40 Guest I'm on a friendship level because I love her like-

51:43 Adam Yeah, but what is in it for you if you're not attracted to either one of them? I mean, I understand like- Well, I'm not attracted to either one of them, but-

51:53 Drew This is what comes from being raised in an alcoholic family. Or some sort of family where you have to be people-pleasing all the time. You're responsible for everyone else's feelings in the family, and that's who you are. And anything else, you feel great devastation if you don't live up to that.

52:08 Adam All right, so what's up?

52:10 Guest I have no... I just... I don't know. I just don't want them to... I don't want to let them down.

52:16 Drew You see that?

52:17 Guest I don't know why.

52:17 Drew It's not about... it's completely people-pleasing. That's her whole sense of herself.

52:21 Adam Well, why don't you just give him a blowjob while she watches or something and kind of compromise? I mean, I don't understand this. I mean, I know you're screwed up because you're not... I would understand it if you always wanted to get a crack at her and she was like a friend of yours, that you're always really attracted to and this is the only way you could sort of legitimately get at her, shush up, Drew. But that's not the scenario and you're not attracted... It's not the scenario with him either, you're not attracted to him. So this just means you're royally f'd up.

52:53 Guest Yes.

52:53 Adam Right. And now what about the first threesome you had? Were they married, this couple?

52:58 Guest No, they didn't... It was just like a guy at a party and a girl at a party.

53:05 Adam Oh, they weren't even together?

53:06 Guest No, they weren't together at all.

53:08 Adam Interesting. Sons of bitches. What goes on at these parties? All right. And they have one kid, this couple?

53:17 Guest Yeah, she has two kids and one with this guy.

53:20 Drew That's three?

53:22 Guest No, just two.

53:23 Drew Wait, she has two kids and one with this guy. And one of the two. One of the two.

53:28 Adam I see. Okay.

53:29 Drew Serena, why do you have no sense of yourself other than to someone who keeps other people happy?

53:33 Guest Well, I told them no several times, but... Hey, hey, hey.

53:37 Drew Serena, can you answer? Answer, Serena. Don't even try.

53:41 Adam Don't get pregnant, all right?

53:43 Guest I'll get... Yeah, I'm not.

53:44 Adam Don't ever get pregnant.

53:45 Guest Okay.

53:46 Adam And try to convince this friend of yours to be a better mother.

53:49 Guest Okay.

53:50 Adam Could you do that?

53:51 Guest I'll try.

53:52 Adam What does this guy do for a living?

53:54 Guest I don't know, construction.

53:55 Adam Yeah, all right. All right. And what does she do? Nothing? She just... Mama?

53:59 Guest She's like an accountant.

54:01 Adam Really?

54:02 Guest Yeah.

54:02 Adam She takes care of the kids all day.

54:04 Guest Huh? She takes care of the kids?

54:06 Adam Yeah.

54:07 Guest Take care.

54:07 Adam Okay.

54:08 Drew All right.

54:09 Adam Don't do it.

54:10 Guest Okay.

54:10 Adam Okay?

54:11 Drew All right. All right.

54:12 Adam Don't get pregnant.

54:13 Drew Don't feel guilty. Don't feel guilty?

54:15 Adam Right.

54:15 Drew You are not responsible for their threesome.

54:19 Adam Yeah. Well, what about mine? I still need one.

54:22 Drew Literally, what she says, I'm responsible for... Here's what people don't think of often times. Think how grandiose that is. That I'm so important that I'm even responsible.

54:31 Adam I'm the keeper of your happiness.

54:32 Drew Even if you demand something crazy of me, it's my responsibility. That's a kind of a narcissism. That's why she can't hear it when you say, you're responsible for these people's feelings. Are you? Yes. Yes. I'm the person that's responsible.

54:46 Adam I scream about it every night, but these people that have kids and carry on this way, I just want them eliminated. I want them put down. I look at them as an enemy of the state, they're like terrorists, internal terrorists. They're trying to screw this country up.

55:01 Guest Yeah, but they were all children once as themselves.

55:03 Drew Yeah, but they were screwed up by their parents.

55:05 Guest Exactly. It's a never-ending circle. So really, where does it end and where does it begin?

55:09 Drew Adam's going to end.

55:10 Adam I put them down. That's where it ends.

55:12 Guest What, with your AK?

55:13 Adam Is that the F word?

55:15 Drew No, she said sucker.

55:18 Adam She said sucker.

55:19 Guest I mean, I was...

55:20 Adam No. Sterilization.

55:22 Drew Mandatory sterilization.

55:23 Guest That's right.

55:24 Adam Mandatory sterilization after the first kid.

55:27 Drew She's too shaken from having some of the words.

55:29 Guest Sorry. Yeah, definitely.

55:31 Adam Sterilization. I got no problem with that. It's fine. Well, what about it? I mean, they're going to screw their kids up.

55:39 Guest And as a society, we've got to be responsible.

55:43 Adam I don't know.

55:43 Guest I mean, it's like, why are we responsible for a never-ending circle of something that's never... I just find that people who are messed up, who are going to have kids, they're going to have kids regardless.

55:55 Caller Well, they are.

55:57 Adam But here's the deal.

55:58 Guest There's no perfect situation where you can raise a kid. I mean, if there's going to be mistakes and everything else, so you know, you just sort of move on.

56:05 Drew But it's the outlying egregious.

56:07 Guest Different norms in every situation.

56:09 Adam No, no, no. There's no perfect situation, but there's dangerous.

56:14 Drew And there is norm.

56:16 Adam You know what I mean? A lot of these people we talk to are raising their kids in a dangerous environment, emotionally.

56:24 Drew And physically, too.

56:24 Adam And physically, too. Right. And these kids are going to get strung out on stuff or kill themselves or go gay or something. I mean, it's really going to be a nightmare. And we need to sterilize them. That's all I'm saying. It's my 20-year plan for the country. We really clean this country up.

56:46 Drew We didn't say that.

56:47 Adam Yeah. We didn't say that. No, no seeding. Just weeding.

56:50 Drew We'll seed the other, the healthier.

56:51 Adam No, just weed.

56:53 Drew Just weed.

56:53 Adam Start over fresh. Right. Robbie?

56:56 Drew Maybe the military is the answer for this.

56:58 Adam Fine. We'll turn them on the citizens. Is that what you're saying?

57:00 Drew No, I'm saying we'll bring people around.

57:02 Adam Oh, you want them to join the military.

57:04 Drew Because military can take weaknesses, you know, things that in normal everyday life are problems.

57:09 Adam Right.

57:09 Drew And convert it into strengths.

57:11 Caller All right.

57:11 Drew You know what I'm saying?

57:12 Adam I'll consider that plan.

57:13 Drew Yeah.

57:14 Caller First of all, don't join the military.

57:17 Adam Robbie?

57:17 Caller Yes, sir.

57:18 Adam You're 16?

57:19 Caller Yep.

57:19 Adam What's up?

57:20 Caller All right. Dr. Drew?

57:21 Drew Yeah, Robbie?

57:22 Caller I need some information on some anxiety medication.

57:25 Drew Okay.

57:26 Caller They have me on Respertol now, but it doesn't seem to be working. And my psychiatrist doesn't want to listen to me. That it's not working.

57:34 Drew What do you mean it's not working?

57:35 Caller Well, one, my anxiety is still getting up kind of high.

57:39 Drew What's the dose of the Respertol you're taking?

57:41 Caller Right.

57:42 Drew What's the dose?

57:43 Caller Two milligrams, one tablet in the morning, one in the evening. Okay. It doesn't really seem to be doing much except getting me whacked out during the day.

57:52 Drew What do you mean by whacked out?

57:54 Caller I just sort of spaced out. I can't really pay attention that well. It's just kind of like being high, you know?

58:01 Drew Well, it's not high. It's a little sedating, right?

58:03 Caller Right. And I can't have that because, I mean, I need to keep my grades up in school.

58:08 Drew Well, you're sedated but you're still anxious?

58:10 Caller Right. And I was just wondering if there's like any other, if there's like something else that would work better or...

58:17 Drew Well, there's a lot of different things. It could be trying. Were you mannichy?

58:21 Caller Yes. Yeah.

58:23 Drew You're bipolar?

58:24 Caller Yes, I am.

58:25 Drew You want anything to stabilize your mood?

58:27 Caller Yeah. I'm on lithium, 1200 milligrams a day. All right.

58:30 Drew So that combination is pretty powerful, pretty reasonable. Maybe you've got to go back to the doctor and be real clear about what your symptoms are. The fact that you feel sedated, you can't concentrate in school and yet you're still anxious.

58:43 Caller All right. And one more thing.

58:44 Drew Yeah?

58:45 Caller My mom has degenerative disc disease.

58:47 Drew Right.

58:47 Caller She wanted to know if working would help speed up the degeneration process.

58:53 Drew What kind of working?

58:54 Caller Pretty much secretary work. No.

58:57 Drew No.

58:58 Adam Why would that?

58:59 Caller I don't know. She was just wondering that.

59:01 Drew Trying to get to disability, though.

59:03 Adam Oh, I see. Well, what does she have? I mean, put up with some with her back?

59:06 Drew Disc.

59:07 Adam What's that? Is that bad? Is she crazy?

59:09 Drew No, no, no.

59:10 Adam Everyone, from doing the show, I've decided everyone has a back problem. It's nuts. It's just 80 percent. I'd say 90 percent of people we talk to have a bad back are insane. I don't know how that works.

59:20 Drew I've got back problems. They're so awful.

59:22 Adam You do?

59:22 Drew I think to myself, if my patients walked in with this pain, they'd be taking so much medicine.

59:26 Guest I have the worst back problems. I pulled my back. So I bought this. I'm so ridiculous. I bought this new mattress. It's Tempur-Pedocratrix. Yeah. You're supposed to cure it. It doesn't cure your back. It just like sinks when you lie down. It's like a broken water bed. They convince you that it's like-

59:43 Adam Lean up on the mic there, sure.

59:44 Guest Oh, I'm sorry.

59:45 Drew You got to stretch. You got to stretch your back three times a day.

59:48 Guest I pulled it.

59:49 Adam Yeah. I read mattress ads whenever I fly in an airplane.

59:53 Drew Do you do that? No.

59:55 Adam Oh, the greats.

59:56 Drew I keep busy when I'm flying. You know that. I've got a new test series for you.

1:00:00 Adam All right. Just shut up. I don't want to hear about it. Jesus Christ, Drew. He never has time to talk on the plane. He's always taking a Scantron test for his pussy doctor stuff, whatever that is. I don't even know what it is anymore. But I always read these things where some doctor from Helsinki has invented a new mattress and it's got like corn husk in it.

1:00:19 Guest And this one's from Australia.

1:00:20 Adam And they do this thing where they go, you spend one third of your life in bed. And I'm thinking one third. I'm up to three quarters. I'm like an invalid at this point. And called. I was in my bed for six hours today, right? That's right. Everyone knows, right? I should go get myself one of these beds. And then there's the one, I like the one where they have the picture where the husband's up watching TV, laughing his ass off, watching Leno, and the wife is sawing logs right next to him. You know, because there's two different firmnesses and one leans up and are you kidding me? Does that ever happen?

1:00:55 Drew No.

1:00:55 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:00:56 Drew Here's the deal, like the four seasons of Ritz-Carlton's, that's the best bed you can get.

1:01:00 Guest Those are amazing.

1:01:01 Drew Yeah, that's what you want to get.

1:01:02 Adam Well, let's check in there.

1:01:03 Guest What should I do?

1:01:04 Adam Well, let's go there tonight.

1:01:06 Guest Night it is.

1:01:08 Caller Yeah?

1:01:09 Adam You're 13?

1:01:10 Caller Yes.

1:01:10 Adam What's up?

1:01:11 Caller Okay, well, there's this guy I know, he's 18, okay? And me and him, we were good friends and we used to always hang out, but then one night...

1:01:21 Drew 18 year old hanging out with a 13 year old.

1:01:23 Caller He's 18. Yeah. We were just friends and well, one night it was just me and him and one thing led to another and we ended up having sex.

1:01:34 Drew Were you guys doing drugs?

1:01:36 Caller No.

1:01:37 Adam Okay.

1:01:37 Caller He was.

1:01:38 Drew All right.

1:01:39 Adam What was he doing?

1:01:41 Caller I don't know, but he was before I went there because, you know, he's always doing drugs.

1:01:48 Drew And you understand it's against the law to have sex with him?

1:01:51 Caller Yeah.

1:01:51 Drew Okay.

1:01:52 Adam All right.

1:01:52 Caller And well, you know, we still talked after that, but I don't know, I think he told me not to tell anyone, but I guess he's afraid you're going to put him in jail. And I told a couple of people and I think he found out and he hasn't been talking to me.

1:02:08 Drew How do you scare to you? How long ago did this happen?

1:02:12 Caller A little bit before Halloween.

1:02:14 Drew Are you on birth control?

1:02:15 Adam No.

1:02:16 Drew What did you guys use?

1:02:17 Caller A condom.

1:02:18 Drew Did it work?

1:02:19 Caller Uh, yeah.

1:02:21 Adam Well, she's not pregnant, so I guess it worked.

1:02:24 Drew I don't know if she checked for that yet.

1:02:26 Adam Nah.

1:02:27 Drew It's only been three weeks.

1:02:29 Adam And so, was this guy, were you in love with this guy?

1:02:33 Guest Well, no.

1:02:35 Caller We just sort of messed around once. I mean...

1:02:37 Adam I know, but did you have feelings for him?

1:02:40 Caller Yes, but now he won't talk to me. And my friend of the night tried to talk to him and he got really, really scary. He just started going off on her because he was drinking.

1:02:50 Caller So...

1:02:52 Adam Boy, this guy really sounds like a knight in shining armor. It's too bad he got away.

1:02:56 Drew I want to go after this guy.

1:02:57 Adam Whew, I'd like to get him for myself. I mean, I'm not gay, but I'd go gay for a guy like this. It's really, it's really catch. Hey, Kristen? Yeah? Probably, probably good that...

1:03:08 Drew He's out of your life...

1:03:09 Adam .guys aren't hanging out. He's probably a pretty bad guy.

1:03:12 Drew Probably.

1:03:13 Guest You don't want someone like that.

1:03:15 Drew Drug addicted child abuser.

1:03:17 Adam Hmm. Hmm.

1:03:18 Drew How far up the scale do we need to go?

1:03:20 Adam What's he do? Does he work? Does he go to junior college?

1:03:24 Caller Um, no.

1:03:25 Adam What's he do?

1:03:26 Caller I don't know. I think he has a job.

1:03:29 Adam What do you guys talk about when you're hanging out?

1:03:33 Caller Nothing really. He always starts like hitting on me and starts like, you know, putting his hands on my leg and I'm like, okay.

1:03:40 Adam All right, hold on. I'm this close to gambling.

1:03:44 Drew Oh, no, it's done.

1:03:45 Adam You're done?

1:03:45 Drew Yeah.

1:03:45 Adam You know what the answer is?

1:03:47 Drew She had to.

1:03:48 Adam She's 13, but she sounds like she's 12. No, nine.

1:03:53 Drew Dad, I'm only getting dad physical abuse of addict-alcoholic. That's what I've got.

1:03:59 Adam Where's your dad?

1:04:00 Caller My dad? Yeah. I don't live with him.

1:04:04 Drew And why not?

1:04:06 Caller Because I don't know him and my mom got a divorce and my dad left. And so I live with my sister.

1:04:15 Drew Not with your mom?

1:04:16 Caller No.

1:04:16 Drew Isn't that kind of weird?

1:04:18 Caller No.

1:04:18 Drew What's wrong with your mom? Hold on.

1:04:19 Adam You guys don't get the impression you're talking to someone who's like eight or nine? Oh, yeah.

1:04:23 Caller No, I'm seriously not eight or nine. I'm thirteen.

1:04:25 Drew No, but the point is something happened to you when you were like eight that sort of arrested your development.

1:04:30 Caller No.

1:04:31 Drew When did your dad leave?

1:04:32 Caller When I was like nine.

1:04:35 Adam I said nine. And when did mom leave?

1:04:39 Caller When I was nine, they left at the same time when they got divorced.

1:04:42 Drew And why did your mom leave you?

1:04:44 Caller Because she didn't want to associate with me.

1:04:46 Drew Why?

1:04:47 Caller I don't know.

1:04:48 Drew What's up with your mom? Is she an alcoholic or an addict?

1:04:50 Caller No.

1:04:51 Drew Your dad?

1:04:52 Caller No, he's an alcoholic.

1:04:53 Drew Right. Was he kind of physically abusive when he was around?

1:04:56 Caller No, never to me.

1:04:58 Drew But to mom?

1:05:00 Caller No, he would raise his voice sometimes.

1:05:03 Adam How is it that your mom is not interested in your life or raising her? Was she arrested? Was she in prison?

1:05:13 Caller No.

1:05:13 Adam Did the court step in and do something?

1:05:16 Caller No.

1:05:18 Caller I don't know. She, we and her never really got along and she never really got along with any of my other brothers or sisters, but...

1:05:27 Adam Is she with any of the brothers or sisters? Hold on a second.

1:05:31 Drew Okay.

1:05:32 Adam Listen, mom has got to be like turning tricks and doing crank or something.

1:05:37 Guest There's got to be something there.

1:05:38 Adam No sober sort of semi-together mom just basically walks away from the family.

1:05:44 Drew A bunch of kids with the dad gone.

1:05:47 Adam Right. Hey, Kristen? Yeah? Where's your mom now? Do you know?

1:05:52 Caller Yeah, she lives up here in the same town as me. We just... Yeah.

1:05:59 Drew What does she do for a living?

1:06:00 Caller Huh?

1:06:00 Drew What does she do for a living?

1:06:02 Caller I don't know. I haven't talked to her in a while.

1:06:04 Adam How many brothers and sisters do you have?

1:06:06 Caller I have three brothers and I have an older sister.

1:06:11 Drew Five of them. And she left five kids. Just left.

1:06:14 Caller And what?

1:06:15 Drew And she just left five kids.

1:06:17 Caller With my older sister. She... Because she moved out and my older sister moved in and started taking care of them.

1:06:23 Guest How old is your older sister?

1:06:24 Caller Twenty.

1:06:26 Caller And she has a kid and she's married and...

1:06:29 Drew Is your mom in a psychiatric hospital or anything like that?

1:06:31 Caller No.

1:06:32 Drew Does she need to be?

1:06:34 Caller Yes, I think she does.

1:06:36 Adam Okay.

1:06:37 Caller I don't know. She just has a major problem.

1:06:39 Adam All right, Kristen, here's the deal. You are... You gotta not get pregnant like until you're like in your seventies. Maybe... Call me when you're in your mid... If I'm still alive... Actually, I'll be dead by then. Call me when you're in your mid fifties. All right?

1:06:56 Drew For approval for pregnancy.

1:06:57 Adam I'll tell you whether I'll give you the green light or not on having the kids. Don't worry. Women will be doing it by then all the time. Well, into their fifties and sixties.

1:07:05 Drew Sure, by then.

1:07:06 Adam Do not get pregnant. This guy, be glad you're not talking to him. He's a criminal.

1:07:12 Drew He is your mom and your dad wrapped into one.

1:07:14 Adam You should bring criminal charges against this guy. You should tell the police about this guy.

1:07:19 Caller Because I went along with it.

1:07:21 Drew No, it doesn't matter. You're not old enough to actually even give consent. That's the way it is.

1:07:27 Caller But I wouldn't want to get him in trouble.

1:07:28 Drew Why not? He's an idiot. No, because.

1:07:30 Adam Okay.

1:07:31 Drew He's a criminal.

1:07:32 Adam Okay, hold on. See, people call this show and they'll say, that girl was raped and you told her it was her fault and she should do nothing about it, you know? And so I tell everyone, okay, just call the cops. But she's not going to do it. And I don't want to hammer away at someone who's just, no way is she going to do it. She's going to hang up the phone and she's not going to call the cops. So I didn't want to try to convince her. What I want to convince you to do is, is don't get pregnant. Don't go the path. Don't go down the path your mom went or your dad went. Don't get hooked up with these abusive guys. Finish school. We'll find Jesus Christ.

1:08:05 Drew Go far away.

1:08:06 Adam Get involved with the cheerleading. Can you go Jewish? Can you turn Jewish? Because that will keep you out of trouble.

1:08:12 Drew She needs a Jewish mom.

1:08:12 Adam Put some weight on. Maybe that's it, sir.

1:08:15 Drew She needs a Jewish mom.

1:08:16 Adam Okay. Kristen, just get involved with school. Any guy you like, don't trust him.

1:08:20 Drew Yeah.

1:08:21 Adam Only guys your age, baby.

1:08:22 Drew Listen to those words, Kristen.

1:08:23 Adam Please.

1:08:24 Drew Guys you're attracted to, learn to read the fact that your attractions will be unhealthy.

1:08:30 Adam Okay.

1:08:30 Drew And be careful with that.

1:08:31 Adam All right. Mama with five kids, that mama with five kids, criminal. She's a criminal.

1:08:36 Guest Yeah, really.

1:08:37 Adam See, what's wrong with getting hold of that bitch after the first kid and saying, mama, no more. You can't handle it. You now, see now your 20-year-old's got another kid.

1:08:48 Guest Married.

1:08:49 Adam Yeah. And who she married to.

1:08:51 Guest A 20.

1:08:51 Adam I'd love to meet that, that gentleman.

1:08:53 Drew Imagine who he is.

1:08:54 Adam Imagine who he is after what she came from and what she saw and now what she's doing and how long before young 13-year-old Kristen here has a brood of her own.

1:09:04 Drew And the three boys are already in jail.

1:09:05 Adam Oh, Jesus Christ. Especially with the ones in heaven and life. All right, everybody. All right, but no, we can't tell anybody about that. We cannot tell. We can tell everyone about what they can do as far as putting additions on their house, but we cannot tell them what to do with their reproductive system. Fantastic. We'll take a little break. Let's all kill ourselves and eat some poison punch in like a Jonestown-type situation, and we'll be back. Anderson will play some just drops and outtakes until the midnight hour. Hey, everybody. It's Love Line. I'm Hitler. That's my friend Stalin over there. Just talking about our plan for the Master Race, right? Is it going all right? It's going all right. Drew says that anyone who has less than a doctorate degree will be eliminated in your Utopia, Drew.

1:10:02 Drew Yeah. Then your degree is what now?

1:10:08 Caller I know.

1:10:09 Adam It's amazing. Can you guys believe that I didn't go to college? I mean, can you believe that? Shocking, isn't it? Shiri and Jena are both here. Yes. Shiri is from Roswell, of course, and that is on UPN, and that is nine o'clock, and that is Tuesday nights, which is tomorrow night for most of our listeners and then tonight for a lot of them. But it's too late because we miss it. Monica?

1:10:38 Caller Hi.

1:10:39 Adam Hey, you're 17. What's up?

1:10:41 Caller Nothing.

1:10:41 Caller Sorry.

1:10:41 Caller I'm kind of nervous right now.

1:10:43 Adam That's all right.

1:10:44 Caller OK. You guys are so awesome.

1:10:45 Adam Well, thanks. What's your question?

1:10:47 Caller Um, well, for like a year and a half now, I've been kind of like attracted to my best friend. And I don't know if I should say anything.

1:10:55 Adam Female or male?

1:10:57 Caller Female.

1:10:57 Drew You're lesbian. Are you lesbian?

1:11:00 Caller No, I don't think I am. I mean, I like guys like a lot.

1:11:05 Drew And what do you mean by attraction? When you describe what that means?

1:11:08 Caller Um, I don't know. Like, I just like, I don't know. I'm like, find myself attracted to her sometimes.

1:11:14 Drew You're lesbian. Are you, are you sort of confusing feelings of warmth and intimacy with, or sort of erotic physical feelings?

1:11:22 Caller Yeah.

1:11:23 Drew Okay. Well, why don't you sort of realize that, that you may be sort of confusing these things and kind of keep them to yourself and enjoy them.

1:11:30 Caller Okay.

1:11:31 Drew But realize that they could have a negative impact on your friendship. And if you value that friendship, kind of keep the boundaries clearer. Unless you, unless you're convinced you're lesbian and you want us to explore things that's different. But this friendship could be altered by you sort of confusing those kinds of feelings.

1:11:46 Adam Is she good looking?

1:11:48 Caller Um, yeah.

1:11:49 Drew Lesbian.

1:11:50 Adam Are you really attracted to her or is she, you know, smart and funny and, you know, No, I think I'm... can't do the cheerleading team.

1:11:57 Caller No, she's not. But I'm, I've been friends with her for like 10 years. So I don't really don't want to, I'm not, yeah, I just won't say anything then.

1:12:07 Adam Do you get to see her naked?

1:12:09 Caller No.

1:12:10 Adam No?

1:12:11 Caller No.

1:12:11 Adam Why not?

1:12:12 Caller Uh, that's just not how we work, I guess.

1:12:14 Drew I don't think you should, you should really not.

1:12:16 Adam She's your friend, right?

1:12:17 Drew But you should not feel bad about these feelings. Just realize that if you acted on them, it could infect your friendship in ways you might not like.

1:12:24 Caller Okay.

1:12:24 Drew Okay?

1:12:24 Adam You don't think she's hot for you at all?

1:12:27 Caller Um, I don't think so.

1:12:29 Adam Yeah?

1:12:30 Caller Yeah. All right.

1:12:32 Adam You can give her some wine coolers and really get to the bottom of this whole thing.

1:12:36 Caller I could, but I don't think I will.

1:12:38 Adam That's a sodium pentothal for teenage girls, wine coolers, Drew. That's how you get to the bottom.

1:12:44 Guest That's a popular drink in freshman high school.

1:12:46 Adam That's how you get to the truth. The truth lies somewhere between the fifth and sixth, a wild mountain berry cooler through the grail.

1:12:54 Caller Uh, wine coolers, they're not hard enough for me.

1:12:57 Adam Oh, they're not?

1:12:58 Drew 17, nice Monica.

1:13:00 Adam Well, listen, you use that as a chaser.

1:13:04 Caller Okay.

1:13:04 Adam You all right?

1:13:05 Caller Yeah.

1:13:06 Oh, I have another really quick question.

1:13:07 Adam Yeah.

1:13:08 Caller Um, I've been having problems sleeping. It's two o'clock over here, but I'm usually up right now. And I wondered if maybe it's, I've started a smoking pot, like a half a year ago and I stopped using sort of, like recently.

1:13:28 Drew Yeah. You'll have a couple months of insomnia. If you're a regular pot smoker and then stop suddenly.

1:13:32 Adam Why?

1:13:33 Drew Your brain has to heal. It affects your brain chemistry and sleep is one of the more delicate mechanisms in the brain. And any central nervous system depressant, if you're taking it every day for more than a couple months and you stop, you're not going to sleep right for several weeks or several months after that.

1:13:47 Adam Yeah. I can't figure out if pot makes me tired or gets me racy. It's all weird now. I got to really, I got to really take a good hard look at pot, you know, really figure out what's going on with that. Yeah, I'm a light weight now. I don't know what's going on. I think I'm just going to eat pot brownies from now on. I think that's my new plan. Drew, you ever eat a pot brownie?

1:14:09 Drew No.

1:14:10 Adam Shiri? Jena?

1:14:12 Guest No.

1:14:13 Caller No?

1:14:13 Adam Really? Yeah.

1:14:16 Caller All right.

1:14:16 Guest Have you?

1:14:17 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:14:18 Guest Yeah?

1:14:18 Adam Yeah. Good times. Did you barf? Yeah. Barf? No. No? I ate everything in the house and I never barfed. Pot brownies are groovy. They are. Groovy. Well, I'm not. I've heard good things. Yeah. I mean, listen, I don't want to endorse drugs, but don't drive. Then be over 18 and try them with them pot brownies. Christina?

1:14:43 Caller Hey.

1:14:43 Adam Hey, you're 16. What's up?

1:14:45 Caller Yeah.

1:14:46 Caller I have really hard time sleeping. Like, I don't normally get to sleep until like one or later.

1:14:54 Caller Yeah.

1:14:55 Caller I don't know why. And I'm like on medicine and like I was wondering if like maybe I could take a different kind or not a different kind because I like this medicine. But I was wondering if like I could take like a sleeping thing.

1:15:11 Adam What time do you have to get up in the morning?

1:15:14 Caller Like six, five or six.

1:15:15 Caller Well, like I have five, it doesn't matter. Anyway, five or six.

1:15:19 Adam Five for what? School?

1:15:20 Caller Yeah.

1:15:21 Adam Where do you live in Sacramento? Where do you go to school? Michigan?

1:15:25 Caller Yeah, no.

1:15:29 Caller I don't know. I go to school in like a different smaller place.

1:15:32 Adam I just kill myself. I couldn't imagine doing that. I couldn't. And you don't get tired during the day or do you?

1:15:38 Caller No, I do. I'm like falling asleep in German and like my teacher's killing me about it.

1:15:43 Drew What is the medicine you're taking?

1:15:44 Caller Prozac.

1:15:45 Drew And you said you like how you feel on the medicine?

1:15:47 Caller Yeah. I like, like, yeah.

1:15:49 Drew How long have you been on it for?

1:15:54 Caller Probably about a month and a half maybe.

1:15:56 Drew And how long have you had the severe insomnia?

1:15:59 Guest Probably a couple weeks.

1:16:01 Drew A couple weeks?

1:16:02 Caller Not a couple weeks, but like this last week mostly.

1:16:05 Drew And has the medication dose been changed at all in the Prozac?

1:16:09 Caller Not really.

1:16:10 Caller No, pretty much.

1:16:11 Caller Well, it went up like two or three weeks ago.

1:16:15 Drew All right. Well, that's probably your problem. So you need to talk to your doctor about that. Because it can cause insomnia very definitely. All right?

1:16:22 Caller But like, um...

1:16:25 Drew You may need something else to help you asleep.

1:16:27 Adam You gotta move closer to school.

1:16:30 Guest Well, my parents don't want me to go to a big school.

1:16:33 Adam What happens? What happens later in life? You go to like just a private world? With a small populace and nobody bothers you? And you think an eight-man football team and you become president? I'm like, you know, I'm such a prick. I was, my step, my nieces were in town from, they live in Seattle and I think they are somewhere in Oregon or who the hell knows. Anyway, the point is, is they came in town. They're cute girls. They're like nine and 13 and 15. And the 15-year-old.

1:17:12 Drew You mean your nieces?

1:17:13 Adam Step nieces. Step nieces? Okay. Yeah. My step sister's kids. My step nieces, right?

1:17:22 Drew You never mention your step siblings, so I always forget you have them.

1:17:25 Adam Well, you know the Corollas. Listen, we don't like each other. My family, the blood part doesn't like each other. What do you think we're going to do with the step part? I mean, imagine if you got a blood family that treats people like step, then imagine what the step gets treated like. Like bad neighbors.

1:17:43 Drew Yeah.

1:17:44 Adam Yeah, they're not step. They're like a whole flight of stairs. Yeah.

1:17:47 Drew Under the steps.

1:17:48 Adam Yeah, like 10, 15 steps. They're stoop. I got a stoop mom. Well, anyway, I got these step nieces and they're great. They're beautiful little girls and they go to school up north. Brittany, the oldest one is 15. Jesus Christ, I hope she's not listening. And they were saying at Thanksgiving that Brittany won Homecoming Queen. How exciting. And I was like, wow, in the 10th grade, Homecoming Queen? That's crazy. Oh, yes, absolutely. I said, I didn't even know you could win Homecoming Queen.

1:18:24 Drew Yeah, that should be senior.

1:18:25 Adam At least a junior. Well, the school all voted and she won Homecoming Queen.

1:18:30 Drew All 80 kids?

1:18:32 Adam Well, we're getting to that part. I said, holy Christ, I went to North Hollywood High. There was like 2,600 kids went there. And you didn't even know the 10th. I mean, seniors didn't know who was in the 10th grade. And I was like, I can't believe that the entire class, seniors, juniors, all those upper classmen, they all voted and you want Homecoming Queen? She's like, yes, indeed. I said, that, I'll tell you, that is quite an accomplishment. And she said, yeah. And then we're just chatting later on. I said, I really couldn't get over it. 10th grader winning Homecoming, and we're like, 10 later and someone said, yeah, there's 100 kids who go. And I was like, I was like, oh Christ. And I had a couple of glass of wine. I was sort of like, I was biting on my lip now. I was like, all right, don't say nothing. No, because you're going to start popping off. But I was like, I wanted to like yell, you should have stopped me when I was going on for 10 minutes about the 10th grade achievement. Yeah, there's 45 kids in the 10th grade and there's 15 seniors, you know. But it's still an accomplishment. It just, it came, Drew, you know, we talk about things coming into focus.

1:19:35 Drew Yes, it makes sense.

1:19:36 Adam It came into focus. If you went to a school of 2000 kids, the 10th grader doesn't make home for them.

1:19:41 Drew Doesn't work that way. So, Adam, every night you're mentioning kids, last couple weeks really, your biological clock is ringing.

1:19:47 Adam I'm ready to have some kids.

1:19:49 Drew Yeah, it's time. I mean, really, we've been getting off on it regularly.

1:19:52 Adam Yeah, I'm ready to go. Shiri?

1:19:56 Guest No, thank you.

1:19:57 Adam Really?

1:19:57 Guest No, I'm 22. I'm staying single for a while.

1:20:00 Adam One of you is ovulating. I can tell. I can tell.

1:20:06 Guest Jena?

1:20:07 Guest No, absolutely not.

1:20:11 Guest We're just running the other way.

1:20:11 Drew Is the sound of them blowing through the door? How?

1:20:14 Adam Drew's a doctor. He could supervise. I mean, keep it all in the open up. No?

1:20:19 Guest No, thanks. No.

1:20:21 Guest I have to pass.

1:20:22 Adam Drew?

1:20:22 Guest No kids.

1:20:23 Adam Oh, no.

1:20:23 Drew I'm not ovulating.

1:20:24 Adam Oh, okay.

1:20:25 Guest Oh, ovulating. I was like, no kids.

1:20:27 Guest No kids. No, no, no.

1:20:29 Guest But neither.

1:20:30 Adam Oh, okay. All right. We'll take ourselves a little break. I'll work on the girls. I'll try to apply them with some tap water and bad Westwood One coffee and maybe a little something, maybe a sack of moths from the vending machine, Drew? Some noodles. Yeah, after this.

1:20:48 Caller Hello? Is this Loveline?

1:20:50 Call 1-800-LOVE-190. Adam and Dr. Drew. It's the Loveline.

1:20:54 Adam I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LAV-1-9-1. Shiri Appleby. Could be Mrs. Corolla. Why are their cars right?

1:21:06 Drew You're not asking for Mrs. Corolla. You're just asking for mama Adam Corolla.

1:21:11 Adam Well, I'm old fashioned.

1:21:12 Drew Oh, I see.

1:21:13 Adam I'd like to get married, then get divorced and start dating one of our son or daughter's friends later on from my Roswell, which is on UPN, 9 o'clock on Tuesday nights.

1:21:27 Drew Also- You could give birth to some kind of weird alien or something.

1:21:31 Adam It's quite possible.

1:21:32 Guest I'm not an alien. I'm a human. I play a human.

1:21:34 Drew Oh, that's bad. It's too bad.

1:21:36 Guest I know.

1:21:36 Adam Yeah. There's only one way to really find out though. Drew is a man of science. Wouldn't you agree?

1:21:43 Drew That would settle it.

1:21:47 Adam Jena Malone is here too. She's from Donnie Darko and stepmom and the house. Building the house of love. Yeah.

1:22:00 Guest Something.

1:22:00 Adam The house that talked. The talking house.

1:22:04 Guest Life is a house. I mean, what the hell?

1:22:07 Adam Life is a house, which is, I think, going to win some sort of Academy Award for somebody in it. Right? Is that what they think?

1:22:14 Guest It could be, you know, but the newspapers always say that stuff just to say that stuff, so we'll see.

1:22:20 Adam It's got a good name for an Academy Award.

1:22:22 Caller Yeah.

1:22:23 Guest Life is a house. It's very strong.

1:22:25 Adam Right. Right. Is Kevin Clancy Bill, is he a builder in that movie?

1:22:30 Guest He plays an architect who sort of loses his job and has to reconstruct his life in the metaphor of house.

1:22:36 Adam Very interesting. Allison? Hi. Hey, you're 17. What's up?

1:22:42 Caller I just called because Shiri was on tonight, and I listen to you guys all the time, and I love you, Adam and Drew, but I'm a really big fan of Shiri's, and I just wanted to ask her if her relationship with Jason Max on the show is anything besides friends off of the show.

1:22:58 Guest No, we're just friends.

1:22:59 Drew Was Jason up here one time?

1:23:01 Guest I don't know.

1:23:02 Drew No, no, no.

1:23:04 Adam Yes.

1:23:04 Drew Okay.

1:23:05 Caller Because I just love the show, and the chemistry between you guys is so great, and I just couldn't help wondering if there's something else going on.

1:23:12 Adam She said she liked him during the break.

1:23:14 Guest Could you stop it? I never said such a thing.

1:23:16 Adam That's what I felt.

1:23:17 Guest I was talking about you, Adam.

1:23:19 Adam Oh, here we go. I smelled, it was either ovulation or love. There was something going on.

1:23:24 Guest There was a pressure on you. I finally admitted it.

1:23:26 Adam Listen.

1:23:29 Guest Now we're just friends. He's a very nice guy.

1:23:32 Caller Yeah, he's really cute, too.

1:23:34 Adam Yeah, he's very cute. He's dreamy, but he's not seasoned and poised like me. You know, this is some good-looking, fresh kid. I think he's gay. That's what I hear.

1:23:45 Caller All the hot ones are gay.

1:23:46 Adam Yep. That's right.

1:23:48 Caller Yep.

1:23:49 Adam All right. Alison, anything else?

1:23:51 Caller He's bisexual.

1:23:52 Caller Nope. I was just calling to talk to her. I think it's so pretty.

1:23:55 Guest Thank you. Thank you very much.

1:23:57 Adam She is.

1:23:57 Caller I watch your show all the time.

1:23:59 Adam Great features too, you know?

1:24:01 Caller Yeah.

1:24:02 Guest Well, thank you guys.

1:24:04 Adam Take care of there, Alison.

1:24:05 Caller Okay.

1:24:05 Adam Let's talk to Sean. Sean?

1:24:09 Caller Hey, Adam.

1:24:11 Caller God, it's weird. Yeah. This is for Jena Malone. Great two movies, Donnie Darko and Life is a House. Big fans of both and oddly enough, I've never seen you before, but you just appeared. To help you guys out for Donnie Darko, which everyone should go see, cause it's a great film.

1:24:28 Caller Wow.

1:24:29 Caller These are the words that I guess best describes it. No matter how screwed up you are in this unforgiving world, you have a place and you're important to the puzzle. And that's kind of best describes that.

1:24:40 Drew You're gay.

1:24:41 Adam All right.

1:24:41 Guest Interesting.

1:24:42 Caller Am I gay?

1:24:43 Caller Well, that's what you're thinking.

1:24:45 Caller I'm calling just for Jena cause much love.

1:24:47 Guest Well, that's crazy.

1:24:48 Caller Thank you. For Malone and it's Nonsense Productions. Just remember that a little while when, later. Later?

1:24:56 Adam When you're making movies?

1:24:58 Caller When I start making movies pretty soon.

1:24:59 Adam All right.

1:25:00 Guest Nonsense Productions.

1:25:01 Adam All right.

1:25:01 Caller Remember Nonsense Productions.

1:25:03 Adam Well, I'm gonna use that for my production company name. I don't care.

1:25:06 Caller I have many other names.

1:25:08 Adam Okay.

1:25:08 Caller But Adam Corolla, you're a pretty funny guy.

1:25:10 Adam Thanks. I'll be in your first movie. You know, our production company Jack Hole Productions is now up and running and I get to listen to a secretary answer our phone all day saying. She says Jack Hole Industries.

1:25:23 Drew Oh, that is nuts.

1:25:26 Adam And did you call my work? Did you get the Jack Hole Industries? Yeah, I laugh like an idiot every time I hear her say that. There's a sign that says Jack Hole Productions. And there's an arrow pointing to it.

1:25:39 Drew What's the emblem?

1:25:40 Adam No, no. Oh, well, it's the donkey that.

1:25:43 Drew I see.

1:25:43 Adam Yeah, but that's not on anything. But I just laugh. I don't hear the industries behind things anymore. You know, when people say something industries, I like to see that come back.

1:25:52 Drew Sort of out of Mark's Brothers film or something. Yeah.

1:25:55 Adam Jack Hole Industries. Enzo?

1:25:57 Caller Yeah. Hey, hi guys. Thanks for taking my call. I appreciate it. Before I get to my question though, Adam, I got to ask you a question about boxing.

1:26:06 Adam Yes.

1:26:07 Caller So, I like to work out with the heavy bag, you know, and I wrap my hands.

1:26:11 Adam Yeah.

1:26:12 Caller And I used, I got the Everlast, the leather boxing gloves, you know, and I wrap my hands correctly and all that, but I always get these big, huge, ugly bruises between my knuckles on my hand when I know what am I, what could I be doing wrong?

1:26:31 Adam Well, you're using bag gloves? Um, I don't, they're just, are they, are they thumbless?

1:26:38 Caller No, they got a thumb, it's like connected at the end, but they've got a thumb, yeah.

1:26:42 Adam Are they, are they like boxing gloves or are they bag gloves?

1:26:45 Caller Yeah, they're boxing gloves, like, they're bag gloves.

1:26:49 Adam Yeah, just use the boxing gloves, that's fine. And what are you wrapping your hands with? The burlap ones? I mean, those, the cloth ones? Does the cloth stretch?

1:26:59 Caller Yeah, no, no, it doesn't stretch.

1:27:02 Adam Gary, go get some, get some good hand wraps.

1:27:05 Caller It looks, it looks just like a big, long, big, long, big bandage.

1:27:09 Adam How big, I, yeah, listen, go, there's a place called Ringside. Just get all your stuff from there. Get a Ringside catalog.

1:27:16 Caller Okay. Baltimore.

1:27:17 Adam Yeah, just do it, just do it through the mail. And listen, when you punch, don't slide off because that's what cuts you up. Just hit it straight and solid and square.

1:27:25 Caller All right.

1:27:26 Adam All right. He doesn't want to know, does he?

1:27:27 Caller Yeah. Oh, okay. Talking about.

1:27:29 Adam All right.

1:27:30 Caller Yeah. That's great. Now, okay, so my real question. Dr. Drew, this one is more for you, I think. I've got this problem with, I don't know what you call it, compulsive stealing. I sometimes take things that I don't even want.

1:27:44 Adam Steal some damn hand rams.

1:27:48 Caller I don't know about those, but no, I don't do it all the time. I mean, but I sometimes do it. And a lot of times I'll take something and then when I get home, I go, geez, I don't even want this. I'll give it to somebody.

1:28:07 Adam What do you do for a living?

1:28:09 Caller Well, actually, I'm in college.

1:28:12 Adam What college?

1:28:14 Caller Well, I live in Baltimore and I go to Johns. I know you're not going to believe this. I go to Johns Hopkins University.

1:28:22 Adam What do you major in?

1:28:24 Caller Well, I just started. I'm a freshman. I know I'm 24. I had to work for a while to save up money. I worked as a paver for six years.

1:28:32 Adam I believe you. I believe you. All right, Drew, what about this cleftomania?

1:28:37 Drew Well, it can be an isolated thing. It can be part of a more significant syndrome. Addicts do this very frequently. They get a thrill out of it and helps them manage their unpleasant feelings, helps them feel better. It's very common. In particular, people are trying to stop doing drugs. It can also be part of certain kinds of personality problems, antisocial problems. What's the matter?

1:28:56 Adam Shiri's moving around. What do you want, baby?

1:28:59 Guest I want that pen.

1:29:00 Adam You want me?

1:29:00 Guest No.

1:29:01 Adam Pen?

1:29:02 Guest Thank you, darling.

1:29:02 Adam Take my pen.

1:29:03 Guest Thank you so much, CD. You're still giving me a wonderful...

1:29:07 Adam What's yours is mine, by the way.

1:29:08 Guest Sorry, I'm sorry.

1:29:08 Adam We've got to start sharing.

1:29:09 Guest I was watching you do... Sorry. They didn't ginger up.

1:29:13 Drew I thought she was building a...

1:29:14 Guest I was going to get up there.

1:29:15 Drew My little airplane is over there.

1:29:18 Adam All right. Yeah.

1:29:19 Drew All right. So it is something that it actually is quite rare. I thought of it in many spheres as a real serious psychiatric symptom because it can be a sign of something more serious.

1:29:27 Adam So what should he do?

1:29:29 Drew He should go to Hopkins Student Health Services and talk about it. They're guarantee of this treatment for this.

1:29:34 Adam Okay.

1:29:34 Drew And it can get pretty out of hand.

1:29:35 Adam All right. All right. Let's talk to Nick, who's 12. Nick.

1:29:40 Caller Yeah. Hi. I mean, my like friend, she invited me over and I like did like sexual stuff with her. And she won't call me now.

1:29:52 Drew You're 12?

1:29:53 Caller Yeah.

1:29:53 Adam Do you like her?

1:29:55 Caller Not really. She's just like a real good friend.

1:30:00 Adam You didn't like her. Were you attracted to her?

1:30:03 Caller Yeah.

1:30:03 Drew A 12, how can you figure out?

1:30:04 Adam I mean, you can be hot for someone at 12. I mean, you don't want to do weird stuff to them.

1:30:11 Drew She's 12 also?

1:30:12 Adam We all had crushes at 12.

1:30:13 Drew What did you do to her?

1:30:15 Caller Well, we both kind of like oral.

1:30:18 Adam You got some oral too? It's all going to be downhill from here and there. You've peaked at 12. Do you realize this? And she did the oral on you. Does stuff other than pee pee come out of your penis at 12? Yes. It does? Jesus Christ. I'll be walking around with my shirt off at school the next day, just posing down.

1:30:42 Drew Posing down.

1:30:43 Caller Yeah.

1:30:44 Adam Yelling, you want some? Say everybody.

1:30:45 Drew I wonder why she won't call you anymore.

1:30:48 Guest How long has she got scared?

1:30:49 Drew She embarrassed?

1:30:50 Adam Did you call her?

1:30:51 Caller Yeah.

1:30:53 Caller She just won't pick up the phone.

1:30:54 Adam Well, she's embarrassed.

1:30:56 Drew You didn't force yourself on her, did you? Did you force yourself on her?

1:31:00 Caller No.

1:31:01 Adam Okay. Do you see her at school?

1:31:03 Caller Yeah.

1:31:04 Adam Okay. You see her at school, write her a note. Write her a note and say, it says, you know what? I still want to be friends with you. I know it's a little weird what happened.

1:31:14 Drew I like you a lot.

1:31:14 Adam But that's okay.

1:31:15 Drew I'll tell you I like her.

1:31:16 Adam Because it's weird for me too. It's not like it just happened to you and we can be good friends.

1:31:21 Drew No, and just don't the friends think you can grow up.

1:31:23 Adam Well, you doesn't like her. You like her as a girlfriend?

1:31:26 Caller Not really.

1:31:27 Adam Why not?

1:31:29 Caller She doesn't have like the personality.

1:31:32 Drew Bogus call.

1:31:33 Adam Yeah.

1:31:33 Drew Yeah, bogus call. Guaranteed.

1:31:35 Adam Sorry, Nick. We don't believe you now. All right. Sorry, buddy.

1:31:38 Drew Yeah.

1:31:38 Guest Yeah.

1:31:40 Drew You go and tell them they're bogus, too. They're like, all right, it's okay. There's just no affect behind that. You notice that?

1:31:46 Adam It's just flat.

1:31:47 Caller Yeah.

1:31:47 Drew Said, why not? She doesn't have the right personality characteristic.

1:31:50 Adam Yeah, like at 12, you're getting a BJ and you're worried about her personality.

1:31:54 Caller We'll be right back.

1:31:55 Adam At 37, I don't care about personality. I mean, not until tonight. All right, we'll be right back. Do all their talking when the lights are off. I know.

1:32:16 Guest We do get all these things off.

1:32:18 Adam We're talking about pheromones. Drew broke wind, and that started a whole conversation on scent and attraction, right, Drew?

1:32:26 Drew And why do we try to cover those things up?

1:32:29 Adam I rarely do.

1:32:30 Guest Well, it's special with saying that you cover it up, obviously, because you're embarrassed, but it's actually a natural attraction that men and women have to each other. They're natural odors.

1:32:38 Adam Yeah. But I'm taking it too far lately. Oh, yeah.

1:32:42 Caller Yes.

1:32:43 Adam Yeah.

1:32:44 Drew Thank you for paying attention to that.

1:32:46 Adam Yeah. I was boxing with David Alan Greene. He belched on me again. Oh, no, he belched in the studio.

1:32:52 Drew Yeah.

1:32:53 Adam Yeah. Belching is was weird. It's more offensive than a fart. I think if you ask most people, what would you rather get from somebody, I think they go gas.

1:33:02 Drew A real bad belch is no good.

1:33:03 Adam Belch is more intrusive.

1:33:04 Drew It's like being vomited on. That's more.

1:33:07 Adam It's offensive.

1:33:09 Drew That was him. That was him. Do that again.

1:33:12 Adam Anderson said that was me.

1:33:15 Guest Who is that?

1:33:17 Adam That's David Alan Greer, buddy.

1:33:19 Drew All right. Let's go to David Alan Greer's song.

1:33:21 Adam All right. Let's everyone watch Roswell.

1:33:23 Drew Yes.

1:33:24 Adam The Tuesday nights.

1:33:25 Drew And go see.

1:33:26 Adam Nine o'clock. And go see. My life is Donnie Darko. Donnie Darko, my life is a half. There you go. And until next sentence. Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew is saying, Mahalo. Yeah, pot brownies are groovy.

1:33:40 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff management sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Anne Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

1:33:54 Adam You realize that when I'm in charge, you will be fixed surgically. I will label you a high risk and an enemy of the state.

Episode Feedback

Monday, November 26, 2001