Episode 1000741951797

0:10 Love Line!

0:15 Voiceover 1-800-LOVE-191 Love Line starts now.

0:20 Drew That's right, Dr. Drew here with...

0:22 David Allen Drew here!

0:24 Oh my god.

0:27 Drew Turn my head.

0:27 I'm gonna hit the eggnog, honey buns! I'm getting all liquored up for Kwanzaa.

0:33 You can't wait.

0:34 David Alan Grier Dr. Drew, you're the most beautiful man I've ever seen.

0:37 David Alan Grier Can I keep doing it?

0:40 David Alan Grier I'm dialing back on the emotion today.

0:41 Drew That's good. It's nice.

0:42 David Alan Grier Oh, geez. The holidays bring out the worst in us, don't they?

0:46 Drew It's good. I love to see you like this. We celebrate Kwanzaa and Christmas and Christmaca.

0:50 David Alan Grier Christmaca or whatever. I've been protesting in front of Walmart all day because they're trying to shut down Christmas.

0:57 Drew Really?

0:57 David Alan Grier Don't you say happy holiday to me, Mr. Merry Christmas and Merry Christmas to you, sir.

1:02 Drew Yeah, thank you. Thank you.

1:03 David Alan Grier Yes, yes, yes. No happy holiday.

1:05 Drew So phone number is 1-800-LOVE-191. If you'd like to share the spirit of the holidays with Mr. Grier.

1:11 David Alan Grier Heck yeah.

1:12 Drew So what are you up to these days?

1:13 David Alan Grier Well, I'm kicking it. I was just telling you off the air, and I just signed up to do a new show.

1:18 David Alan Grier Show?

1:19 David Alan Grier A new talk show, talk and comedy for Fox.

1:22 Drew I am so excited for you about that. That sounds fantastic.

1:25 David Alan Grier I'm real excited about it. So we started a new year, but first you got to go home.

1:30 David Alan Grier Got to go home and visit the folks.

1:32 Drew Here in Loveline?

1:33 David Alan Grier Yes, yes, of course. Well, you know. We appreciate that.

1:37 Drew Of course.

1:37 David Alan Grier I love, I love Loveline. No, I'm saying the holiday is coming up.

1:40 Drew You're going to go home, home?

1:41 David Alan Grier Oh, of course, of course.

1:43 Drew But now your parents are separated?

1:45 David Alan Grier They are, they are.

1:46 David Alan Grier Mom gets my love this year. She hasn't been feeling well, so I have to go and mostly listen.

1:51 Drew Do you normally visit one and the other is one of those weird things, right? Oh, I got to go.

1:54 David Alan Grier It's two o'clock.

1:55 Drew I got to go to bed.

1:56 David Alan Grier Well, my dad lives down the coast, so usually I'll go.

1:59 Drew Here? It's like San Diego?

2:01 David Alan Grier To San Diego.

2:01 Drew And where's your mom?

2:02 David Alan Grier She's in Detroit, which is, and all my cousins and everybody. Yeah, everybody's back there. So my brother and I, we've been traveling a lot to visit mom and shovel snow and listen, a lot of listening. She hasn't been feeling well. She's doing much better now.

2:18 Drew Anything you can understand or help with?

2:20 David Alan Grier She had a stroke, man.

2:22 David Alan Grier No kidding.

2:23 Drew She able to take care of herself and stuff?

2:24 David Alan Grier Yeah, she's cool. Like she said, I just, son, it's me, your mother. I woke up. I have a little trouble walking. But then she talked for like an hour and a half.

2:33 Drew This was the morning of the stroke or as later she was?

2:35 David Alan Grier She called me and I was on my way to a gig and I was calling her and, you know, in route and she talked and talked and I was like, well, what could this possibly be? She's talking for an hour and a half. And I was like, mom, you have to go to the hospital. So finally she went and everything was fine.

2:49 Drew Yeah, strokes, they don't feel a thing. They just, they feel like, I was standing at the airport one time and this guy was standing there. He starts leaning to one side and then down he goes. He goes, oh no, I don't know what that was. I'm fine. Whole left side's out.

3:00 David Alan Grier He's like, I bet he didn't know it though.

3:02 Drew He had no idea.

3:03 David Alan Grier Yeah, he didn't. Uh-oh.

3:03 Drew It's called.

3:04 David Alan Grier Dr. Drew. Okay. Both sides are working.

3:06 Drew It's called anasognosia.

3:07 David Alan Grier Yeah, I'd love to talk about anasognosia, but let's say some babies.

3:10 Drew All right. This is Ashley, 22. Oh, David Alan Grier, Ashley.

3:13 David Alan Grier 23.

3:14 Drew 22.

3:14 David Alan Grier 22. Can I see the screen, please?

3:16 Drew No.

3:16 David Alan Grier Why are you trying to shut me down?

3:18 Drew Because I want to surprise you.

3:19 David Alan Grier It's because I'm black, isn't it?

3:21 Drew I don't want to say it.

3:23 David Alan Grier Ashley, what's cracking, honey?

3:25 David Alan Grier Not much.

3:26 David Alan Grier All right, man.

3:27 Drew She's missed energy tonight.

3:28 David Alan Grier Yes. What's going on?

3:30 David Alan Grier Well, I was wondering if I was unusual because I have orgasms, anal sex as well as oral sex.

3:37 David Alan Grier God bless you. You are unusual, my dear. You are one of God's chosen few.

3:42 David Alan Grier Obsessed with anal sex.

3:47 Drew Is there anything unusual about you otherwise, other than you have this magical talent?

3:51 David Alan Grier Well, I have excessive sexual drive, like really bad.

3:55 Drew I have noticed that sometimes women that have this sort of preoccupation have a sexual abuse history. Has that ever been? Sometimes. That's not characteristic of, but sometimes.

4:04 David Alan Grier Let's not jump to conclusions.

4:05 Drew I'm just asking.

4:06 David Alan Grier New day, new day, okay?

4:07 Drew Ashley, any trauma or anything? Yeah.

4:10 David Alan Grier Wow, you say any trauma.

4:11 David Alan Grier Yes, yes, yes, pow. Yes.

4:13 Drew And I think it is something to do, it's got to be the wiring of certain people with that trauma. You know what I mean? Obviously, that's the case. You think so? But it just makes them, it makes them very hypersexual and very preoccupied with that and able to orgasm with that.

4:28 David Alan Grier Right, but doesn't it go up and down like hyper and then hypo?

4:31 Drew Yes, it's a sort of bipolar quality. So Ashley, see what we could do, David, we could hook you up with Ashley and that would bring it right on.

4:37 David Alan Grier That would be a house on fire there, honey.

4:39 Drew It would be bring on the negative, the sort of the down sweet.

4:42 David Alan Grier Call me back door David. How dare you not click me out? I love you. Ashley, come on.

4:50 Drew But were she to let you in, how would that go?

4:54 David Alan Grier You know what I came for, honey?

4:55 David Alan Grier That no mommy is even possible.

4:57 Drew Hang on Ashley, David wants to tell us something.

4:59 David Alan Grier I come home after a long day.

5:02 David Alan Grier Give me a beer Ashley.

5:03 David Alan Grier Don't you look at me. Don't you?

5:05 David Alan Grier Come here.

5:05 David Alan Grier Come here. Don't you? Yeah, that's the way to go, my love, making it a little shorter than that, probably. Ashley, you are a blessed woman. There is nothing wrong with you at all.

5:37 Drew It's fine. Just be careful that if you start to go after abusive guys or if you have a sudden down, that's what you do usually, huh?

5:47 David Alan Grier Yeah, that's right. I just got out of that relationship, so yeah.

5:50 Drew That's good. I was kidding about you hooking up with David, but the reality is when you actually do get involved, well, when you actually do, no, I mean, just hyperbole.

5:59 David Alan Grier What?

5:59 Drew What do you mean?

6:00 David Alan Grier I don't follow.

6:01 Drew If she actually did hook up with a nice guy like yourself, absolutely. Suddenly, she would, you would become fearful or unable to be sexual because anything, she would only be sexual to a bad guy.

6:10 David Alan Grier I hear you.

6:11 Drew Because that's attached to the bad part of herself.

6:12 David Alan Grier Then I'd have to be all fake bad guy.

6:15 David Alan Grier You make me sick.

6:17 David Alan Grier Oh, give me a hug, honey. Come on.

6:19 David Alan Grier I love you. No, I don't.

6:20 David Alan Grier You know, I'd be a fake bad guy.

6:22 Drew Right. That's your good. You're good.

6:23 David Alan Grier Well, take care of that bum.

6:25 Drew Are you fine? You all right? Anything else?

6:27 No, that's it. Thank you so much.

6:28 Drew I mean, you're fine from the standpoint of your biological function. I worry about your psychological function and see if you can have a real relationship. That would be very important. Jake 24.

6:38 Yes, sir. I'm calling. My question is, my old lady and I, we've been together for almost a year now. We practice safe sex in terms of, you know, using a condom and everything. She's been on the birth control pill for as long as we've been sexually active. And now, just recently, she told me she was about seven days late on her period. My question to you is, mainly, I'm sure it's possible. And she took a home pregnancy test and everything, saying that, you know, it came out negative.

7:09 Drew Right.

7:09 But still, the weight is, you know, is she going to have a period?

7:13 Drew No, no, no. She probably skipped the period this month.

7:16 Okay.

7:17 Drew Periods on certain pills, people with periods, will be very light, missed, or just completely skipped.

7:21 David Alan Grier So what you're saying is she can skip her period. Period.

7:24 Drew Absolutely. Period.

7:26 David Alan Grier Do you hear what I just did, Drew? I flipped it and made a jokey out of it.

7:29 Ha ha.

7:31 David Alan Grier She's going to miss her period.

7:32 David Alan Grier What? Period. Period. Bingo. Next caller. Let's save some babies.

7:37 Drew All right, Jake, but the fact is, though, while you can get pregnant on the pill, you did the right thing. When she missed her period, get the pregnancy test, do it again in about a week, but you're wearing a condom and taking the pill, no way is she pregnant. No way.

7:49 David Alan Grier That is super safe.

7:50 Drew Yeah, it's good. Good. Randy's 27.

7:53 David Alan Grier I'm wearing a condom now.

7:54 David Alan Grier Yeah, my question is, I want to know if there's a way to tell the size of a man's penis by just looking at him, a hand, feet, body.

8:02 Drew Well, now, I mean, look at David. Just do the assessment. What do you think?

8:08 David Alan Grier Pinky, pinky, pinky, pinky, pinky, pinky.

8:11 David Alan Grier I don't know.

8:12 David Alan Grier I don't know how to tell.

8:13 David Alan Grier And I want to be able to tell. You don't know how to tell. Before I get him in the room, not after.

8:16 David Alan Grier A lot of it's in the voice, baby. You know, when the voice drop down deep, that means he's packing wood, honey.

8:22 David Alan Grier He's got a log in his pocket.

8:26 David Alan Grier Have you had some bad experience with some inky dinky do's there?

8:29 David Alan Grier I was with a guy for about six or seven years who was small, and then I went out with a guy who was large, and the difference was night and day, and I was free.

8:37 David Alan Grier You like the large. But how about-

8:39 David Alan Grier David?

8:39 David Alan Grier Hold on.

8:40 Drew You're making an assumption there.

8:41 David Alan Grier No, no, no. I'm saying what?

8:43 Drew Just saying.

8:44 David Alan Grier What I'm making? I'm not making- I'm saying how big a difference was there. Give us an idea. You're saying three to nine?

8:49 Drew I just like the way you jumped right to-

8:51 David Alan Grier Four and a 12.

8:52 Drew For you, Randy. For most of me. It doesn't matter.

8:54 David Alan Grier No, no. I didn't say that. I didn't say that because I'm trying to say how little is little.

8:59 David Alan Grier A hot dog.

9:01 David Alan Grier What?

9:02 Drew Hot dog?

9:02 David Alan Grier Hot dog.

9:04 Drew Hot dog. Is that length or that width or both?

9:07 David Alan Grier Girth.

9:08 Drew How about the length?

9:09 David Alan Grier Compared to a banana.

9:11 David Alan Grier Okay, but how long though?

9:14 David Alan Grier Five inches compared to six.

9:17 David Alan Grier Dr. Drew said, okay, like, okay, that's normal in my house. Oh boy. So you said then you started hanging out with Banana Man.

9:24 David Alan Grier Yeah.

9:25 Drew And what was the difference for you?

9:27 David Alan Grier Night and day, no orgasm to all the way, constant orgasms.

9:32 Drew Okay.

9:33 David Alan Grier Now what kept you with the other do Inky Dinky for like six, seven years?

9:36 David Alan Grier A child.

9:38 David Alan Grier Oh, wow.

9:40 David Alan Grier Wow.

9:40 David Alan Grier Wow. Is he there with you now? Are you starting? Not the child, the ex.

9:45 David Alan Grier I'm single now.

9:47 Drew The child is with you though, yes?

9:48 David Alan Grier Yeah, I have the child.

9:51 David Alan Grier Are you still with Big Boy?

9:52 David Alan Grier No.

9:53 David Alan Grier What happened to him?

9:55 David Alan Grier It was the...

9:56 David Alan Grier Packy Macky.

9:57 David Alan Grier It was for weekend.

9:58 Drew That's my other question. Is there anything, was this a bad guy? Was there anything else sort of arousing about him other than the anatomy?

10:06 David Alan Grier Well, he knew what to do.

10:09 David Alan Grier How old is she?

10:11 Drew 27. But nothing about the women for whom the size makes a difference. They are generally women of larger stature. Not necessarily size, but just taller and more...

10:19 David Alan Grier Your big girl?

10:21 David Alan Grier No, no.

10:22 David Alan Grier No, I was going to say that doesn't... Like the physical size of a woman and the size of what I... The technical term is the box, the cooter, is not... You can have a big girl on Inky Twinkie Dinkie.

10:32 Drew The technical term for that?

10:33 David Alan Grier The love box.

10:33 Drew The love box. Stink hole. Okay.

10:35 David Alan Grier Yeah, stinky hole.

10:36 Drew Twinkie hole.

10:37 David Alan Grier Twinkie hole, twinkie hole too. Yeah, yeah.

10:38 Drew I believe that's what you...

10:39 David Alan Grier Twinkie hole, baby.

10:41 David Alan Grier Woo!

10:44 Drew Okay, yeah.

10:44 David Alan Grier Oh, gosh. Yeah, yeah.

10:46 David Alan Grier God bless.

10:46 Drew Oh, yeah. Happy Holidays, everybody. Yeah. Happy Kwanzaa.

10:49 David Alan Grier Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas.

10:51 David Alan Grier Now, why didn't you stay with Big Boy?

10:54 David Alan Grier It was short-term, just for sex.

10:57 Drew But he was done. He was out.

10:59 David Alan Grier Oh, really? Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

11:00 Drew How tall are you? Just let's finish that conversation. How tall are you? How tall am I?

11:03 David Alan Grier 5'4.

11:05 Drew All right. I don't think this is a rule. I wouldn't jump to it, but I've noticed that women who say, oh, yes, size for me, because most of them will say, oh, no, no, I'd rather not have the too big a deal. I don't like it. But the ones that typically say it matters, I've noticed, just tend to be bigger people. That makes sense then, too, right?

11:20 David Alan Grier I've talked to women who said, this is-

11:22 Drew It's not a rule.

11:23 David Alan Grier Can I finish what I had to say?

11:25 Drew Go.

11:25 David Alan Grier All right.

11:25 David Alan Grier This is radio.

11:26 David Alan Grier Let me tell these people what Nazi Drew is doing to me.

11:29 David Alan Grier You're putting a hand up.

11:30 David Alan Grier What I'm saying is, I've talked to women who've had boyfriends who were too big.

11:34 Drew All the time. That's the number one complaint.

11:36 David Alan Grier Like, hurts them.

11:37 David Alan Grier Boyfriends who are too small. Most women will tell you, you want a guy that fits correctly. Am I right or wrong, honey bun?

11:44 Yeah, yeah.

11:44 David Alan Grier There you go. There you go.

11:45 Drew And for her, for Randy, the correct fit was this guy.

11:48 David Alan Grier Banana man.

11:49 Yeah.

11:50 David Alan Grier All right. Well, here's what you do. You start the kissing and hugging and grip around down there, and see what he's packing before you go any further.

11:58 David Alan Grier But then how do I break it to him that it's not? I don't want to tell him.

12:02 Drew How you guys always do it. You sort of avoid it.

12:04 David Alan Grier I'm busy. I have a kid. You have the best excuse in the world. I have a child. I can't bring you into my life. I don't know you. What are your intentions, mister? Yeah, that's what you do.

12:14 Drew Let's stay with the penis thing here. This is Samantha 19.

12:18 Hi.

12:19 Drew Hey.

12:19 David Alan Grier Hi, Sammy.

12:20 Hi. How you guys doing?

12:22 Drew David Alan Grier. Give him a call, 1-800-LOVE-191. He's here to celebrate Kwanzaa Christmas Hanukkah.

12:30 David Alan Grier Kwanzaa, Kwanzaa, Kwanzaa, and the Koran. What's it? Ramadan. Give me some Ramadan songs. You know what I mean? Ramadan. Ramadan.

12:38 David Alan Grier Ramadan.

12:39 David Alan Grier Ramadan. Ramadan.

12:40 David Alan Grier Ramadan.

12:41 David Alan Grier Ramadan. We don't eat all day.

13:13 Drew There may be also a phallus change, too. Usually, it goes the other way at first.

13:17 David Alan Grier I thought it was in your heart.

13:19 And your penis shrinks? Meaning like you get big first, then your penis shrinks?

13:25 Drew It's somewhat unpredictable, but the testes shrank, for sure.

13:29 Oh, okay, because my boyfriend, he just doesn't believe me, because I told him it can affect your...

13:33 Drew He's into nonsense. Just listen. The testes shrank. The erectile... Thank you. Thank you. The erectile... God bless you. The erectile... Oh, oh my God.

13:45 David Alan Grier Let me tell you what I had.

13:47 David Alan Grier Well, what I had is I had my usual dinner of... Fried onions, garlic, peppers.

13:55 David Alan Grier Pepper, a couple cabs.

13:56 Drew You went Mexican tonight.

13:57 David Alan Grier I did, I did, but God bless you.

13:59 David Alan Grier But wait a minute, wait a minute. Now, Dr. Drew, let me ask you something. I thought desire goes up.

14:04 Drew Desire goes up, I have not seen any good literature that describes what happens to the phallus under different settings of testosterone. But patients report to me...

14:14 David Alan Grier Why is there after all this time, nobody knows?

14:16 Drew Because we're not who's gonna fund that. Listen, the fact is I've heard reports, I've seen evidence that there is some change. Like when men, friends of men, take positions of authority and stuff, their testosterone goes up. And people call and say, you know, this has changed. I'm just telling you it has. And so I've heard guys on steroids say this too, that they have erections all the time and the penis seems bigger and harder for a while. And then it goes the other way. Everything goes down and shuts down.

14:38 David Alan Grier Right. But what about Danny Bonaducci? He said, you know, he...

14:41 David Alan Grier I got a question for you, though.

14:43 David Alan Grier This is my boyfriend.

14:44 David Alan Grier This is her boyfriend.

14:45 David Alan Grier Well, slow down, steroid man.

14:46 David Alan Grier Already he's like, I don't close up for you, then.

14:49 David Alan Grier I don't close up for you.

14:50 David Alan Grier I want to push in the steroids.

14:51 David Alan Grier What?

14:53 David Alan Grier She said he doesn't want to make fun of me. I just want to know, what can I do to get her off faster? You know, because I'm taking stories for, you know, I'm thinking about taking stories for about, you know, six to eight months, you know, doing the full circle and cycle and everything. But I want to know, what can I do to get her off that? If I can't get her off, what's there any good of me being with her? She's not going to want to be with me.

15:13 David Alan Grier Well, wait a minute. Hold on. Are you taking steroids now?

15:17 Drew Yeah, yes. He let that slip.

15:20 David Alan Grier I heard that slip, too. Dude, are you taking steroids now? Are you taking steroids now? Calm down. Are you taking steroids now?

15:30 David Alan Grier Yes or no?

15:32 David Alan Grier No. Not right now, no. But I have in the past. I'm going to take them again.

15:36 David Alan Grier All right.

15:36 David Alan Grier Hold on.

15:37 David Alan Grier Calm down.

15:38 David Alan Grier Wait a minute.

15:39 David Alan Grier Wait a minute.

15:40 David Alan Grier I'll pump the brakes. All I can ask right now is about 30 minutes. But she wants it to last longer.

15:45 David Alan Grier Did your sex drive change when you started taking steroids the first time?

15:48 David Alan Grier Yes. It made me want to not have sex as much. She wanted sex all the time, but I didn't want it as much. So I want to keep taking steroids because I want to get really, really big. For what, then? To keep making my sex drive longer and longer so that she'll be happy. Because if she's not happy, then what's the point of being with her?

16:09 David Alan Grier I hear you, but why are you taking steroids?

16:11 David Alan Grier Hold on, hold on, hold on. She's going to go on and find someone.

16:14 David Alan Grier Dude, he's already arguing with him.

16:16 David Alan Grier Hold on, hold on, hold on.

16:17 David Alan Grier Ooh, maybe.

16:18 Drew This is a pretty disturbed situation.

16:20 David Alan Grier Maybe the missionary position.

16:22 Drew You were starting to have an emotional reaction.

16:24 David Alan Grier Why?

16:24 Drew Because the guy's sort of bipolar and mannaky and grabs the phone and gets in very aggressive.

16:28 David Alan Grier Right, right. I was like, why are you taking steroids?

16:31 Drew You can't, it's...

16:31 David Alan Grier I can't get through to him, Dr. Drew.

16:33 Drew You don't know everything. I'm just saying, just be prepared. You're not going to get a satisfying answer.

16:37 David Alan Grier All right, put the guy back on.

16:38 Drew I will, I will. Okay, shh. Everybody calm down.

16:40 David Alan Grier Okay, everybody calm down.

16:41 Drew Samantha, calm down. Samantha's boyfriend, calm down.

16:43 David Alan Grier Hey, Dr. Drew, sit back down. Take a deep breath.

16:46 David Alan Grier You.

16:47 David Alan Grier Calm down. Not good enough, not good enough. Calm down. Laugh right now. That's not a laugh. All right, put him on.

16:56 David Alan Grier But I can't satisfy my girlfriend.

16:58 David Alan Grier She thinks it's funny, but I can't satisfy.

17:02 David Alan Grier All right, put him back on. He's ready now. All right, why are you taking steroids?

17:06 David Alan Grier What happened?

17:07 David Alan Grier Why are you taking steroids?

17:09 David Alan Grier Because I want to improve my body health. Because all my friends, they're really big, but they're big naturally. Are you short?

17:15 David Alan Grier Are you short? Are you skinny? What's up? Like if you're not on steroids.

17:19 David Alan Grier I'm 14 pounds, but I'm not really big. But I want to get really, really big. So I think it's going to make me big.

17:27 Drew This is about three different diagnoses here.

17:29 David Alan Grier I've been to the gym since I was 14. I'm 20 now. I've been to the gym since I was 14, and it has not made me big at all.

17:35 Drew You blew it out?

17:36 David Alan Grier He means he worked it out. You're in the gym, right?

17:39 David Alan Grier I've been to the gym since I was 14. All right.

17:41 David Alan Grier What do you do for a living that you need to be that big?

17:43 David Alan Grier I'm in the Navy.

17:45 David Alan Grier Okay. Next caller. I can't do nothing with him.

17:48 Drew Samantha. I mean, can we talk to Samantha again, everybody?

17:51 David Alan Grier You want to talk to Samantha?

17:52 Drew Yeah, I sure do.

17:53 David Alan Grier Okay, hold on.

17:54 David Alan Grier Samantha.

17:56 David Alan Grier Hold on a second.

17:57 David Alan Grier I wouldn't take any drug that messed with my nuts.

18:00 Drew Yeah.

18:01 Hello?

18:03 Drew Honey. Hi. Run. Put the phone down and run.

18:07 David Alan Grier I take the phone down and run.

18:09 David Alan Grier I told them I don't want to do it.

18:11 I don't.

18:12 Drew Now, what's your deal?

18:14 Caller There's nothing really I can do.

18:16 Drew Neither of you guys have a... Something wrong with both of your ears? People talk to you to don't listen.

18:20 David Alan Grier Are you sandblasters by trade or what? What's going on?

18:22 Drew All right, Samantha, here's the deal, honey. You need... This guy, he seems like a nice guy.

18:27 Caller He's awesome. I've been with him for almost four years now.

18:29 Drew How's the relationship been?

18:31 David Alan Grier Loud. That's how the relationship's been.

18:34 Drew He's a little manicky, right?

18:36 David Alan Grier Yeah.

18:36 Drew Yeah. And a little aggressive.

18:39 David Alan Grier Huh?

18:40 Drew A little aggressive, a little manicky.

18:41 David Alan Grier He's being choked right now, she's got to.

18:42 Caller He's not really aggressive, but he's really demanding.

18:46 Drew Demanding is aggressive.

18:47 Caller It's his way or no way, and if it's my way, then it's the highway.

18:50 Drew It's aggressive. What happened to you that you think that's okay to be sort of?

18:53 Caller That that's love.

18:54 Drew Yeah, that that's sort of a good thing.

18:56 Caller Yeah.

18:57 Drew What was your dad like?

18:59 Caller Well, my dad used to, I don't know, he used to be really, he's really strict with me when I was little and I got kicked out.

19:06 David Alan Grier Shut up.

19:07 David Alan Grier Okay. I think we understand.

19:10 Drew Okay.

19:10 David Alan Grier Shall we move on?

19:11 Drew Yes, let's do so.

19:12 David Alan Grier You know, Dr. Drew, I like the sick puppies. Let's do happy calls. Let's do only happy calls. Sunday night, the day of our Lord.

19:19 Drew This is Loveline this year.

19:20 David Alan Grier Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was hate line. You know what?

19:23 David Alan Grier Because there's two doors in all way.

19:24 David Alan Grier There's Loveline and hate line.

19:26 Drew You came at it. You came at the hate line. Leslie, 23.

19:30 Caller Hey, how are you?

19:32 David Alan Grier Hey, what's up?

19:32 Drew Hang on a second, Leslie. We just want to, I feel like I left Samantha and her buddies. But the point is, he's a manic. He's got a body image problem. There's a lot of stimulant and marijuana abuse in people that do steroids, particularly stimulants. I'm worried he's maybe tending towards addiction. She has the abuse of dad. That's why she's with the demanding abusive guy. Probably dad was an alcoholic. There's a lot of stuff going on in that relationship. They need to take a good look at it.

19:58 David Alan Grier You know what? This whole steroid thing, I don't understand why just normal people take it.

20:03 Drew You don't have a body image problem.

20:04 David Alan Grier Hold on. I could see if you were like a football player, a cage wrestler, a policeman.

20:13 David Alan Grier I mean anything where you needed to break the whoop ass. But I'm going to tell you this.

20:17 David Alan Grier Those Navy Seals, little guys always do better. It's not the really big dudes, it's the little dudes that swim and swim and run and run. Being you would be like, go get it baby. Take that heel baby, I'll meet you back at the tent.

20:30 Drew And you'd be making fun of that guy too, because he's out there protecting your country.

20:33 David Alan Grier Well, we don't know that.

20:34 David Alan Grier He said he's in the Navy, he didn't say he was in Iraq.

20:36 Drew Good point. The point is though, they need to just, they need to take a look at things. This is a volatile situation with the steroids, you've mixed that in, it can be a real, I mean we were goofing around with them a little bit, but that can be a very, very serious situation. So, Leslie, go ahead, 23.

20:48 David Alan Grier I just would never take any drug that would threaten to shrink me.

20:51 David Alan Grier I have this guy that I've been seeing for like two months and I kind of want it to be more than just a booty call and for him to be my friend, but I don't really know how to approach him.

21:00 Drew Well, A, this is the problem with friends with dendrophils.

21:04 David Alan Grier Thank you.

21:11 Drew She didn't say it was fancy.

21:14 David Alan Grier Where are you from? Where are you from?

21:16 Drew Kentucky.

21:18 David Alan Grier I'm from North Carolina.

21:22 David Alan Grier North Carolina.

21:25 David Alan Grier But I was born in Boston, so...

21:27 David Alan Grier Oh, OK, cool.

21:27 Drew Born in Boston.

21:28 David Alan Grier You're exonerated.

21:30 David Alan Grier How long did you know the guy before you started hitting it?

21:34 David Alan Grier We kind of went out for maybe a month before. We just recently started having sex within the last month. And, I mean, he came over and we go out to eat and stuff, but it's not always about sex. But, whenever we do have sex, there's a difference between having sex with somebody and a more involved sexual experience.

21:52 Drew Right. Here's the deal. It's certainly reasonable for you to have the talk with him, to go, where are we going? What's this about? I'm starting to have feelings. But the reality is, when you begin a friends-with-benefit situation...

22:03 David Alan Grier Which is wonderful, by the way.

22:05 Drew But it is an agreement that you're not going to go beyond that. And the fact is, that never works out. It never... Always somebody develops feelings. You don't. You can never do that. Because the other person is still... What?

22:16 David Alan Grier I was in a relationship for like six years, and I'm just now getting into the dating scene. How do I let them... How do I go from being in a relationship? Like, I kind of want a relationship.

22:27 David Alan Grier You got to say that.

22:28 Drew Say that first date. You got to start up with...

22:31 David Alan Grier They'll turn running. They will run.

22:32 David Alan Grier Well, then they're going to run anyway.

22:34 Drew Then you end up... There's something wrong with you, Leslie, because then you end up just being exploited. Because if that's what you want, you need to assert that. There are guys out there that want relationships, too.

22:42 David Alan Grier You're not talking to one of them, but... No, that's not true.

22:45 David Alan Grier But you know what?

22:46 David Alan Grier Here's what you do.

22:47 David Alan Grier Here's what you do.

22:47 David Alan Grier You talk to this guy. You tell him just what you told us. The only way it's going to work and be prepared is like any negotiation. You got to be prepared. You state what you want and be prepared to lose. Yeah. IE in the end, you're going to win because... Let me ask you, do you feel good after you guys have sex? I mean, is it enjoyable to you? Because I don't get that it really is. You're just doing something to keep them there.

23:08 David Alan Grier Let her answer, Drew. It is very good.

23:11 David Alan Grier It is very good. But I think another factor that has something to do with it... I think something else has something to do with it. I'm the first white girl that he's ever been with and he's a black man. Well, the color of one's...

23:22 Drew What the heck does that have to do with it?

23:24 David Alan Grier Yeah, no, it doesn't. Now, that doesn't... The color of one's skin doesn't...

23:30 Drew That's why it's good for him.

23:33 David Alan Grier Why is it good for you? It's good for you because you know you're the first white girl he's ever been with. That's why it's so good for you?

23:40 David Alan Grier No, I'm just saying that's why I'm kind of afraid to say anything because I don't know if he would have a relationship like that with a white woman.

23:49 David Alan Grier No, you got to state your case. Say this is what you want. If he doesn't buy it, let him go.

23:52 Drew And you've got to do that up front with everybody because the guys that turn running are the guys you don't want to be with because you're looking for a relationship.

23:59 David Alan Grier Let's do something different. Okay, I just met you. Hey, hey, girl, what's up? You know, hi, David. Hey, what's up? Listen, I want to take you out, you know, you know, really? Yeah, let's get them draws on.

24:09 Drew You're kind of fresh.

24:10 David Alan Grier Yeah, well, you know, that's where I'm at, you know. I'm all about it, about it, baby.

24:13 Drew Are you black?

24:14 David Alan Grier Yeah, I am.

24:15 David Alan Grier I am. I am. What you got? You got something to tell me? You're not feeling what I'm saying?

24:18 Drew No, I think that's cute.

24:19 David Alan Grier OK, so you think it's cute that just I just want to hit them draws and just get up out of here?

24:23 Drew How dare you?

24:24 David Alan Grier I'm sorry, what did I say?

24:25 Drew How dare you?

24:26 David Alan Grier I'm sorry, what did I say?

24:27 Drew I wanted to go see that play downtown.

24:29 David Alan Grier Oh, really? Brokeback Mountain? Yes.

24:31 Drew Yes, the mute. Yes. How about those those lovely young men?

24:34 David Alan Grier What do you want?

24:35 David Alan Grier You don't like the booty call arrangement?

24:36 David Alan Grier What do you want to tell me?

24:38 Drew Well, let's just hit it. Let's go ahead.

24:40 David Alan Grier Oh, no, that's not what you do, Dr. Drew. You're the girl. You're supposed to go. I don't want this.

24:45 Drew No, it's like I don't want you. I'm being Leslie. OK. No, no, no.

24:48 David Alan Grier You say be Leslie positive.

24:50 Drew Say, what's up, baby?

24:51 David Alan Grier What's going on?

24:52 Drew Listen, I'm going to just get undressed while you're talking. David, put your penis back in your pants. All right, then. It's going to take a while.

24:58 David Alan Grier I'm rolling it in.

24:59 Drew I know. I appreciate that. I'm impressed. I'm impressed.

25:02 David Alan Grier I'm putting it back in the sack.

25:03 David Alan Grier I like to flip it around the back because then it doesn't boast too much.

25:06 Drew You're making it very hard for me.

25:07 David Alan Grier I want to have you. You're making it hard for me, too.

25:09 Drew I'm looking for a boyfriend. And I feel like if we start having sex too soon, you'll just you'll lose respect for me.

25:15 David Alan Grier Why can't I just do one thing? Just don't.

25:19 David Alan Grier OK, I hear what you say. I don't.

25:24 Drew David, did you have to do that to yourself? I really I want to go out to dinner and I'm losing my appetite.

25:40 David Alan Grier See, it could work, it could work, but you gotta state your case, right, Drew?

25:43 Drew Yeah, yeah, yeah.

25:44 David Alan Grier Gotta state your case.

25:44 Drew All right, Loveline will be right back.

25:46 David Alan Grier Beautiful.

25:47 Excuse me.

26:03 Drew Hey, everybody, it's Loveline, 1-800-LO- Call up and have David Alan Grier react to you.

26:10 David Alan Grier Well, I'm not going to react, Dr. Drew. You know, I've been watching a lot of the medical channels.

26:14 Drew Oh, I'm on that channel.

26:15 David Alan Grier Well, I got some knowledge now.

26:17 David Alan Grier Good.

26:19 Drew So you're ready to help?

26:20 David Alan Grier Oh, it could be your epididymis.

26:21 Drew You've got some training.

26:22 David Alan Grier Yeah, your liver could be acting askew. You could be the toxins, you know, messing with your chromedome and then all that. There are the bird flu. So I got a lot of knowledge here. Excellent. A lot of knowledge here.

26:35 Drew Let's get on with that.

26:36 David Alan Grier Okay, let's save some babies. Next caller.

26:38 Drew K28. We just, I would just hear from David off the air. What was going to make him drink or use drugs?

26:43 David Alan Grier Oh, how dare you?

26:44 David Alan Grier How do you, how do you pervert what we talked about?

26:48 David Alan Grier Not me. I said other people.

26:50 Drew Oh, you said you could understand how somebody would.

26:52 David Alan Grier Yes, that's not me.

26:53 Drew Because you would if you were in that situation.

26:56 David Alan Grier But I'm not them.

26:57 Drew But if you were in that situation, you would be you.

27:00 David Alan Grier You know what? Take, they should take your license.

27:03 Drew OK.

27:04 David Alan Grier Because you're insane.

27:05 Drew OK, K-28.

27:06 David Alan Grier Hello.

27:07 David Alan Grier OK.

27:08 David Alan Grier Oh, my problem is that my husband is in Iraq right now. And I'm currently seeing someone else. And I told him I was married recently, hoping he would end the relationship. But he has decided that he does not want to end it.

27:25 David Alan Grier What's your question?

27:26 Drew Yeah, I'm already confused. What's the question?

27:28 David Alan Grier I'm trying to get rid of my boyfriend before my husband comes home.

27:31 David Alan Grier All right. Do you have kids?

27:33 David Alan Grier Yes.

27:34 David Alan Grier How many kids do you have?

27:35 David Alan Grier Three.

27:36 David Alan Grier Three kids. Great. That's beautiful. Now, you the thing that before Dr. Drama turned this over to you, because I'm already I'm through it.

27:42 Drew You're angry.

27:43 David Alan Grier Well, I'm saying like she is already the tone of powerlessness. So it's like this dude hit you over the head with a brick and said, We're going to do this and you have no choice in the matter.

27:53 Drew Is the boyfriend.

27:54 David Alan Grier Yeah. Well, she said he will not in this relationship like she has no husband. No, the boyfriend.

27:59 Drew I'm getting confused.

28:00 David Alan Grier No, she said this man will not stop seeing her boyfriend. Yeah, she has no power.

28:06 Drew Right.

28:07 David Alan Grier It's no control.

28:08 Drew But she wants to get rid of the husband.

28:09 David Alan Grier I thought you wanted to get rid of the boyfriend.

28:11 David Alan Grier I'm going to get rid of both of them, actually.

28:15 David Alan Grier Okay, so what's your question?

28:17 David Alan Grier I would like to get rid of the boyfriend first.

28:19 David Alan Grier I'll tell you what, you get rid of both of them, keep seeing the boyfriend, let your husband come home. That will get rid of all of them.

28:24 David Alan Grier Yeah, but then the boyfriend will get...

28:25 Drew You might get killed in the crossfire though.

28:26 David Alan Grier Well, you know, that could happen too.

28:27 David Alan Grier They'll both be in trouble because they're both military.

28:30 David Alan Grier Well, what about thinking about your children, right?

28:34 David Alan Grier My husband's not their father.

28:36 Drew How many fathers?

28:38 David Alan Grier I'm going to say, hold on, hold on, let me guess. I'm going to say three.

28:42 Drew How many fathers?

28:43 David Alan Grier You'll be wrong.

28:44 David Alan Grier Those two.

28:45 David Alan Grier Oh, you'll be wrong.

28:47 David Alan Grier Do I know my white trash or do I know my white trash expert, Dr. Drew Pinsky?

28:55 Drew I, by the way, Kaye predicted you had three kids and two fathers. That was my opening shot. It's not on the screen here, you'll notice. All right.

29:00 David Alan Grier So the husband.

29:01 Drew Did I not hold up the fingers?

29:02 David Alan Grier You did, man. You did. This radio, let them know, baby. Now, you say you're saying that the husband is not the father of any of these kids.

29:09 David Alan Grier No.

29:10 David Alan Grier All right. Are you pregnant now?

29:11 David Alan Grier Oh, no.

29:13 David Alan Grier Okay.

29:13 Drew What medication are you taking?

29:15 David Alan Grier None.

29:16 Drew Are you supposed to be on some medicine?

29:18 Caller No.

29:20 Drew You sound like somebody that has been on, been on, or...

29:23 David Alan Grier We sound sick. I mean, she's got a sore throat or something.

29:25 Drew Yeah, but...

29:26 David Alan Grier I just wrote a sword tonight, but I'm not on medication.

29:28 Drew No, I mean, psychotropic meds.

29:30 David Alan Grier Right. I hear you. She's a little down in it. Are you happy? Do you feel depressed right now or what?

29:35 David Alan Grier Do I feel depressed? Yes, because I want to get a divorce and I don't want to be with anybody. I would rather be by myself. I know I'm happier by myself.

29:42 David Alan Grier Okay. I got a crazy nutty thing. Now, Dr. Drew, I'm going to go out on a limb here. This is nuts. This is bananas. But I want to end this year the way I want to start it. I've never advocated this in my life. This is crazy, but I'm going to give it a shot. Why not just be honest?

29:57 Drew To both of them.

29:58 David Alan Grier Yes. Why not say, I don't want to see you.

30:00 Drew You are nuts. And I don't want to have your license taken away.

30:02 David Alan Grier You're crazy. Put me under arrest. Boy, I should be in the kook house, you know. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Lie to everyone, honey.

30:11 David Alan Grier You know what I think you should really do?

30:12 David Alan Grier Get a girlfriend. Get a girlfriend.

30:15 Drew What do you think, Kay? What about that? No, I mean being honest. Being honest.

30:19 David Alan Grier Be honest.

30:20 David Alan Grier I've tried. When I told my husband right after he left, I told my husband I wanted to divorce, and he told me that he would fight me.

30:29 David Alan Grier He would what?

30:30 David Alan Grier He would fight it.

30:31 Drew Why don't you get the papers and serve him and that's that.

30:34 David Alan Grier What did you tell the boyfriend when he said, look, I want to keep seeing you? What did you say?

30:39 Caller I laughed at him.

30:41 David Alan Grier You laughed. Are you still seeing him, though?

30:45 Caller Yeah.

30:46 David Alan Grier Okay. Well, you're still seeing him because you want to see him. If you didn't want to see him, then you would stop seeing him. If you want to get a divorce, then you will tell your husband and start initiating the divorce. Problem solved!

30:59 Drew Next caller! It sounds Dr. Phil-esque, but, Kay, the reality is the only thing you have control over is you here. And this is one of those situations where you could change things by just doing something. And the fact is, I understand it's difficult to change, and there's reasons that you're caught in what you're caught in. There must be all kinds of extenuating circumstances, but you're pretty clear what you want to do. You want both guys out. Neither of them have any commitment to these kids. Here's what I suggest. You, because you seem to have difficulty making decisions on your own behalf, need to make them on behalf of your god damn children. Excuse me. Excuse me.

31:34 David Alan Grier God bless.

31:35 Drew God bless children.

31:36 David Alan Grier Excuse me.

31:36 Drew God bless children. And I'm not saying the children are damned. I'm saying that you, the fact that, Merry Christmas, David. Merry Christmas to you, sir. But the fact that you haven't been doing that is where the god damn comes in. There you go. And you need to focus on what their needs are. You've relinquished your right to focus on yourself, and you need to focus on these kids. If there were a father around, it would be important to focus on that relationship. But there isn't, so you gotta focus on these kids, keep them safe, make decisions on their behalf, keep it a safe, sane environment, which now it's insane. God only knows what these kids have to witness.

32:09 David Alan Grier Shorten it up a little.

32:10 Drew All right, here we go.

32:10 David Alan Grier Now hold on. If you were going to put that in a song, how would you say? You need to make a decision, figure out what you want, and be honest, just one time in your life, it needs to be like, what you want.

32:26 Drew Don't, it needs to be like sort of to don't rain on my parade.

32:28 David Alan Grier Oh yeah.

32:28 David Alan Grier Don't tell me not to see you.

32:31 David Alan Grier I don't want to.

32:32 David Alan Grier Don't rain on my parade.

32:36 David Alan Grier Yes, something like that. That's beautiful.

32:38 Drew Marie 22. We are just smoking.

32:42 David Alan Grier Hey Marie, nothing but chicks. I like that.

32:44 Drew What's for you?

32:45 David Alan Grier Hey Marie.

32:45 Drew I did that for you. I selected them that way for you.

32:47 David Alan Grier Hey Marie.

32:47 Drew I had Ben Stine on here refusing to talk to man.

32:50 David Alan Grier Ben Stine's an old pervert. I can feel it. He's a perv. He's a perv. I know it. Ben Stine, come out of your pervy hiding place.

32:58 Drew Ben, if you're listening.

32:59 David Alan Grier He's a dirty old man.

33:00 Drew I believe you know the hotline number here.

33:01 David Alan Grier He's a dirty old man.

33:02 Drew Please know that I'm defending you.

33:04 David Alan Grier Please, how can, he is an idiot. He's not an idiot. He is the biggest idiot I've ever heard. How can you sit there and praise Michael Powell?

33:14 Drew Michael Powell's a smart guy.

33:15 David Alan Grier Oh my God.

33:16 Drew Please, give me a break. Ben Stein, you may not agree with his politics, but he's a very smart guy.

33:22 David Alan Grier If I don't agree with you, you're an idiot.

33:24 Drew Okay. Marie, 22, as long as you're not...

33:27 Caller He's an idiot.

33:27 Drew Hello? Marie, what's up?

33:29 Caller Hey, well, I used to be on different medications, and I sort of took myself off them.

33:38 David Alan Grier That's always a good plan.

33:39 Caller Yeah, and I was on Risperdal.

33:43 Drew What's Risperdal? Atypical antipsychotic?

33:46 David Alan Grier Antipsychotic?

33:48 Caller Yeah, and I was...

33:49 Drew Used for other things, used for other things other than psychosis, but...

33:52 David Alan Grier Don't interrupt, please.

33:53 Caller I'm sorry, I was just wondering what Risperdal is actually prescribed for, because I dealt with different doctors at different times, and all I was told is that it was for paranoia. But I looked it up on the internet, and that it could be for different things.

34:10 Drew Yeah, it's used for a lot of different things. More than anything, it's probably used for agitation.

34:16 David Alan Grier Didn't they tell you what you were diagnosed with? Each doctor says...

34:19 Caller Well, no, they just told me it was paranoia. And at another point, they told me that I had disorganized thinking.

34:26 Drew And I definitely was... The depression is a diagnosis, but disorganized thinking and paranoia are symptoms.

34:33 David Alan Grier Well, first of all, I can't follow what you're saying, and I think you're out to get me.

34:36 David Alan Grier What does that mean?

34:37 Drew That's a symptom of paranoia.

34:38 David Alan Grier Look out!

34:39 David Alan Grier You know what I just did?

34:40 David Alan Grier I took what she said, I flipped it, made a little jokey out of it.

34:43 Drew You're talented.

34:44 David Alan Grier You had a good...

34:46 Drew You ever thought about comedy as a career?

34:47 David Alan Grier I don't know, but why are you staring at me? Now, you're saying... Now, why did you take yourself off of rispedal? Was it whispering to you to do that?

35:01 Caller The doctor at the time was letting me wean off of it.

35:06 Drew Okay. You probably had an agitation. You probably were in a severe depression. Sometimes paranoia and agitation is part of that. And the respiratory can be helpful in resolving those symptoms. You were being weaned off, you were following some misdirections, you got off it.

35:18 David Alan Grier Do you feel good now?

35:20 Drew Hang on. Marie?

35:21 David Alan Grier Do you feel healthy and good now?

35:23 Caller That's the thing is I'm wondering if maybe I should try going back on medication, but I don't know.

35:31 David Alan Grier What do you feel like? What do you feel like right now?

35:35 Caller Well, I mean, I get depressed off and on, but I'm not sure if the risk at all would help me with that.

35:42 David Alan Grier Do you hear voices?

35:44 Caller Sometimes I think I hear my name being called.

35:47 David Alan Grier What's your name, Marie? Marie.

35:50 Caller And it gets kind of, it can be embarrassing, you know, like I think I hear my name and nobody's there, you know?

35:56 David Alan Grier Marie, look over your shoulder.

35:58 Drew That's a pretty heavy symptom. Are you on drugs?

36:00 Caller No, I used to smoke pot.

36:03 Drew Yeah, but that won't do it. Well, it can make you paranoid and stuff, but that would be causing the voices and things. It's pretty serious, Marie. Go back. Do not make your own decisions about your medical management.

36:10 David Alan Grier But listen to yourself. Wait a minute. Listen to yourself. You're calling in.

36:14 Drew She's decided that things need to be changed and I agree.

36:16 David Alan Grier Exactly. That's a healthy choice.

36:18 Drew Yes, go take care of it.

36:19 David Alan Grier Listen to that one voice. Marie, go back on medication, please.

36:23 Drew Brenda? Hello? Hey, Brenda, what's going on? David Alan Grier, 1811. LVE 191.

36:30 David Alan Grier You know, Dr. Drew, I do miss that one lone 48-year-old guy who calls in and, oh, yeah, I'm trying to leave my first fourth wife.

36:39 Drew I got a couple of them.

36:40 David Alan Grier OK, cool.

36:40 Drew I got a couple of testicle questions just for you.

36:43 David Alan Grier What's going on?

36:45 Caller Hello?

36:46 Drew Hi, Brenda.

36:46 David Alan Grier How are you?

36:47 Caller Oh, hi, hi. You see, I'm married, and me and my husband were considering a threesome, and we're both awkward, but we're kind of afraid of the consequences of how we'll feel afterwards.

37:02 Drew Good, you should be. Go ahead and listen to that instinct because-

37:05 David Alan Grier Who started this conversation?

37:07 Drew Well, yeah, it's an interesting question. Who's idea?

37:09 David Alan Grier Who started it?

37:10 Caller It was my idea.

37:10 David Alan Grier Oh, really? Have you ever done it before?

37:12 Caller No, no, no, never.

37:14 David Alan Grier You haven't.

37:14 Caller My husband was my first and so I was-

37:17 Drew Here's basically how it works, Brenda. When the woman brings this up, it's a bid to destroy the relationship. When the guy brings it up, he's just being an a-hole and he will also destroy the relationship.

37:27 David Alan Grier Well, he's not just being an a-hole, he's being a guy.

37:29 Drew I know, but her bid is for-

37:30 David Alan Grier Come on, you said it to your wife at some point in your relationship. Yes, you did. Yes, you did.

37:34 Drew No, what I said was-

37:35 David Alan Grier At some point- What did you say, Dr. Drew?

37:37 Drew May I say it?

37:37 David Alan Grier Okay, go ahead.

37:38 Drew Is it if threesomes were actually healthy in a good relationship?

37:43 David Alan Grier But didn't you put it out there to see what you do?

37:45 Caller No, no, no, no, definitely.

37:46 Caller I feel like I want to break off the relationship. I'm saying I'm married to you. I was like, what about just over eight months? It's just that-

37:52 Drew You're going to destroy it.

37:53 David Alan Grier Well, what do you say threesome? What do you mean by threesome? Like you make out with the girl, he makes out with you, and that's it? Or the two guys? Yeah, is it two guys?

38:02 Caller No, actually, like, it's kind of hard to describe.

38:07 David Alan Grier No, it's not.

38:09 David Alan Grier Two girls. Two girls or two guys?

38:11 Caller Two girls and one guy. Okay.

38:14 David Alan Grier And what exactly, how far does he get to have intercourse with both of you?

38:19 David Alan Grier Yeah.

38:20 David Alan Grier Really? That's okay.

38:23 Caller I feel okay about it, but the thing is that this nagging feeling in my head after that night, it could be terrible. Yeah. Right.

38:32 David Alan Grier Well, you should listen to that.

38:33 Drew Yes, Brenda. That is what will happen. You will go insane. Absolutely. It's a very rare couple that can tolerate this. And what I constantly see is only two situations. First of all, a 19 year old's married. You're looking for chaos. You're looking for trouble.

38:48 David Alan Grier Well, I have another scenario, but you go ahead.

38:50 Drew But she may be just, she never had been with anybody else.

38:52 David Alan Grier Yeah, right. And how long have you been with your husband?

38:54 Caller I've been with him a year.

38:56 David Alan Grier Yeah, about exactly a year.

38:58 David Alan Grier But wait a minute.

38:59 David Alan Grier I've seen, I know a lot of couples that when they first hook up, they experiment with a lot of stuff and they may do a couple threesomes. And as a relationship grows and gets more serious, they transition out of that.

39:11 Drew Yes.

39:12 David Alan Grier Very rarely in the middle of a relationship. Usually in the beginning.

39:16 Drew Right.

39:16 David Alan Grier And when everything settles down.

39:18 Drew But not the beginning of a marriage. They're married.

39:20 David Alan Grier Well, she's 19, so.

39:22 Drew I know, but they shouldn't have gotten married is the real issue here.

39:24 David Alan Grier No, they shouldn't have. But they're married now, doctor.

39:26 Drew I know. And therefore, they hold my breath.

39:29 David Alan Grier Do you have kids?

39:31 Caller No.

39:32 Drew Good.

39:32 Caller Wow.

39:32 David Alan Grier That was like an alien. No. No.

39:35 David Alan Grier I don't have kids. No, I don't have kids.

39:37 Drew But I just think now they are married, they relinquish their right to mess with the relationship.

39:42 David Alan Grier No. Well, no, you have to experiment. Marriage is an experiment. You know, there's more than one rule. I mean, I've just never, I've never seen it.

39:50 Drew Let's play the odds.

39:51 David Alan Grier I've never, have you ever seen a successful open relationship?

39:54 Drew No.

39:55 David Alan Grier I haven't.

39:55 Drew No, I mean, I've seen it for a while and I've seen people convince themselves for, like, political reasons that, I'm just more involved, this is a good thing, and they deny the very heavy feelings they take away from it.

40:04 David Alan Grier I met, I met, well, I won't go into it, but I met a woman who was in, we were at this bar, and she was there with her female lover. Her husband slept with guys. They were married.

40:20 Drew They're two gay couples who are married.

40:21 David Alan Grier Right, right, but I was like, and I just kept going, now why are you married? Because I love him. And I was like, okay, all right, that's cool. And you don't care, like what, I mean.

40:29 Drew You know what happens to those people, let me be very clear with you, they end up in, we see them in a psychiatric hospital, and you sort of put them in a microscope, you really see how crazy these things are. Now, God bless them.

40:38 David Alan Grier That was a crazy system.

40:39 Drew If it makes them happy, whatever, it's not to be judgmental, but it's a symptom.

40:44 David Alan Grier Right, I just, I wanted to know, I said, well, then why did you, because I love him. He's my best friend. I'm like, okay, whatever. I gave up after a while.

40:50 Drew 1-800-LOVE-1901, but we will not give up. We will not. We're going to take calls. David Anger will be right. Right back. Yep. All right, David Allen, we're on Love Line. Let's wrap it up with a couple of young men here. Brett 28.

41:22 Hey, how's it going?

41:24 Drew What's good, Brett?

41:24 David Alan Grier What's up? What's up, Brett?

41:25 David Alan Grier Okay, here we go. I got a question for you. About eight years ago, I was having sex in a car, and I injured one of my testicles, and it swelled up pretty bad.

41:34 Drew What exactly happened? Yeah.

41:36 David Alan Grier I got a hematoma.

41:37 Drew What did you, what mechanically happened?

41:39 David Alan Grier Mechanically, we were in...

41:42 Drew Car seat flap?

41:43 David Alan Grier We were in the bucket seat of a car, okay? Yeah. Pushed up a little too high, and it kind of took a beating.

41:49 Drew You mean the repeated action did it?

41:51 David Alan Grier Just one.

41:52 David Alan Grier Gave me, just one. Just one sat a little higher than the other one. I guess the other one sat down a little farther.

41:55 Drew So you, did you get an ultrasound done?

41:57 David Alan Grier Yes, I did. That was the first time. I had the hematoma.

42:00 Drew Yeah.

42:01 David Alan Grier The second time...

42:02 Drew You had good times.

42:04 David Alan Grier Yeah. No, the second time was, I believe, what he told me was an infection from the first time.

42:10 Drew Right. You'll be more prone to that kind of thing.

42:12 David Alan Grier Exactly. So now I believe it's coming back to me.

42:14 Drew Epididymitis. Remember you mentioned the epididymia?

42:15 David Alan Grier Epididymitis.

42:18 David Alan Grier That'd be the one.

42:19 David Alan Grier How does that manifest itself? Does it just swell and hurt or what?

42:22 David Alan Grier It got, the second time was worse. It got to the size of almost a Coke can.

42:26 David Alan Grier Oh.

42:26 David Alan Grier Yeah, it wasn't pleasant. It didn't want to move.

42:33 Caller Yeah, it wasn't pleasant.

42:37 David Alan Grier Were you having sex and stuff?

42:39 David Alan Grier No. You know what?

42:40 David Alan Grier It was kind of hard because it was...

42:41 Drew It can't move around.

42:42 David Alan Grier It was bigger than the other one.

42:43 David Alan Grier David, David, you okay?

42:45 Drew Oh. Hold on a second. You know what happens? Imagine if you just were to hit it with sort of a pin or scalp and it would crack open and you would have all that...

42:55 David Alan Grier And something comes out...

42:57 Drew .all that blood and pus emptying and draining out of it and maybe some seminal fluid with it to make the pus and blood. It could be malodorous and anaerobic, bacteria, create a stench.

43:12 David Alan Grier Oh my gosh.

43:15 David Alan Grier Oh, jeez.

43:16 David Alan Grier So now before I go to the Bahamas, I would make sure it swells so I look good in my Speedo.

43:20 David Alan Grier Hey, look out.

43:22 David Alan Grier Hello.

43:23 Drew So what's the question?

43:24 David Alan Grier Actually, what I was trying to find out, first of all, is, is that going to be a problem with that testicle now? Is that... Does that affect it?

43:29 Drew Could be. Could be, yeah. You mean it's a fix... Effectiveness? Yeah, it could be.

43:33 David Alan Grier Yeah. So I mean, would I be more likely not to work well with the right side?

43:38 Drew You only need one side. You only need one testicle.

43:40 David Alan Grier You're talking about having kids, right?

43:41 David Alan Grier It's happening, right?

43:43 Drew Yeah, you should... I mean, it could affect things, but you also could be okay. I bet you're okay.

43:48 David Alan Grier But you've only had that one... Like you're injured at the first time, you had the big Coke can incident the second time, and in eight years nothing else has happened.

43:56 David Alan Grier Well, the first one and probably about... It was about three years ago, and now it's still harder than the other one.

44:03 David Alan Grier It's...

44:04 Drew Yeah, it's all scarred up. Why don't you get a sperm count? See what's going on.

44:09 David Alan Grier Yeah, I'd like to. My insurance doesn't cover that.

44:11 David Alan Grier Yeah, but you can do it yourself, man. You got a good pair of glasses?

44:14 David Alan Grier My glass, the magnified glass didn't work.

44:15 David Alan Grier Look out! Look out, homeboy!

44:18 David Alan Grier I was moving around, and it kept moving, it melted.

44:20 David Alan Grier Right?

44:21 David Alan Grier What'd you give you?

44:21 David Alan Grier Like one, two... Ah, geez, I gotta start over again. One, two, three. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Two other parties. They're moving around.

44:28 David Alan Grier There you go.

44:29 David Alan Grier Is that a drill?

44:31 David Alan Grier Yes.

44:31 David Alan Grier I actually had a two-part question for you.

44:33 Drew Yeah, go ahead.

44:34 David Alan Grier Okay, because you're an addiction, a metal...

44:36 Drew Yeah.

44:36 David Alan Grier Well, he is addicted.

44:37 David Alan Grier Yeah. I'm not addicted to anything. I just need to know the consequences of Vicodin over seven years, taking about 40 a day.

44:47 David Alan Grier Why would you...

44:47 Drew Well, deafness, if you're not an addict...

44:49 David Alan Grier Why would you...

44:50 Drew Here's the deal.

44:50 David Alan Grier You're addicted to that question.

44:51 Drew Vicodin is basically the same chemical as heroin or opium or morphine. It's a very serious form of addiction. The drug itself, the hydrocodone, doesn't hurt anything, but it causes the most profound form of addiction that a human can be exposed to.

45:05 David Alan Grier The acetaminophen.

45:06 Drew The acetaminophen can cause liver issues, but the reality is something about the way people sort of step up the use of Vicodin. I've only seen one case of liver toxicity from acetaminophen, and my average patient is taking 40 to 60 Vicodin a day.

45:19 David Alan Grier But how many did he say he was taking?

45:21 Drew 30 to 50. 30 to 50. But that's sort of...

45:23 David Alan Grier First of all, it's not me. They wouldn't let me go with the secondary question. It's my sister.

45:26 Drew I know. All right. But here's the deal. It's a severe addiction. It needs to be treated. And Vicodin has been associated with sudden nerve deafness, sensory neurohearing loss. Yeah. Like a rush head, right? So you can get some deafness from that, even when the smaller dose is a Vicodin too. So be careful with that. We gotta go to break now.

45:40 David Alan Grier I can't hear you.

45:41 Drew 1-800-LOVE-191.

45:42 David Alan Grier I don't hear anything. Are we on the air?

45:44 Drew Hello? Be right back.

45:45 David Alan Grier Where's my Vikes?

46:04 Drew 1-800-LOVE-191, David Alan Grier on Loveline. And this call, I'm excited to take. It's another David for David. 30.

46:13 David Alan Grier Hey, yeah, David.

46:15 David Alan Grier Hey, what's up, man?

46:16 David Alan Grier I wanted to thank you. I'm recovering from cancer. And with the day I found out I had cancer was the day, last time you were on the show. And you were doing the bits with the medicine names. And every time I started feeling down, I would go and read my medicine pills.

46:34 Drew Oh, for god sakes.

46:35 David Alan Grier I didn't know where you were going. And I would hear you doing that in my head. And I really, really just wanted to thank you for that. Because it really got me through a depressing time.

46:43 Drew But Mr. David from Las Vegas, who's calling here. David, how about we do that tonight, where you get your medicines and you sell them to David.

46:52 David Alan Grier This is when I'm the black people?

46:53 Drew Yes, you're the mom. You're the black mom. Okay, okay, okay. I have a couple questions first, so David. What kind of cancer do you have?

47:01 David Alan Grier I had breast cancer. Really?

47:03 Drew Wow, that is rare. That sucks.

47:06 David Alan Grier Well, they actually told me it wasn't as rare as people think it is.

47:08 Drew I know it isn't. Yeah, I don't think you guys really talk about that. But it's still...

47:11 David Alan Grier How rare is that, Dr. Drew?

47:13 Drew I've got like two patients with it out of my entire population.

47:15 David Alan Grier Let me ask you something. You think you know everything?

47:17 Drew No.

47:18 David Alan Grier You think you know every damn thing in the world? Every medical problem? How many people have, I don't know, club feet in the world?

47:24 David Alan Grier Oh, got you there, didn't I?

47:26 David Alan Grier Dr. Know-It-All.

47:28 Drew Rick, look that up online, Club Feet Incidents.

47:32 David Alan Grier So listen, man, are you healthy?

47:34 David Alan Grier I won't know for a couple of months. I finished my last chemo on Monday. I got the thickness of it.

47:40 Drew What stage were you?

47:41 David Alan Grier I was first stage one. They actually caught it very early. The oncologist said the only reason they probably felt it was the tumor was sitting right on a nerve ending.

47:51 Drew Oh, you heard.

47:52 David Alan Grier It was just in one breast or both?

47:54 David Alan Grier No, just in my left one.

47:56 David Alan Grier Right, right. You're going to get reconstructive surgery, are you?

47:58 David Alan Grier No, they gave me a lumpectomy. I didn't have the full mastectomy.

48:02 Drew So you have implants done, too?

48:03 David Alan Grier Yeah, well, I didn't really need them. I might now because I lost a lot of weight during the chemo.

48:09 Drew What kind of chemo did you get?

48:10 David Alan Grier I don't even remember the name of what they gave me.

48:12 Drew Cytoxan.

48:14 David Alan Grier Can't they do really pointed? Like I had a friend who had colon cancer, but he walked around with a little like a fanny pack.

48:22 David Alan Grier No, I went in every two weeks and had it done.

48:25 David Alan Grier That's heavy. That's a real thing.

48:27 David Alan Grier I just wanted to make sure because cancer is really rampant in my family.

48:29 David Alan Grier Really?

48:30 Drew Yeah. Do you have that BRCA gene, interestingly?

48:33 David Alan Grier I don't think so.

48:34 Drew What's your ethnicity?

48:35 David Alan Grier I'm Jewish.

48:36 Drew How dare you? Ashkenazi Jew.

48:37 David Alan Grier How dare you, Drew? I'm Jewish.

48:40 David Alan Grier I'm Jewish-Creek and English, actually.

48:42 Drew Interesting. Do you want to switch on hole where you go get your medicines?

48:46 David Alan Grier Actually, the only thing I have left right now are painkillers.

48:50 David Alan Grier What kind of painkillers?

48:51 David Alan Grier One of them. They gave me Vicodin.

48:53 David Alan Grier God bless you. How many Vics you got right now there, buddy?

48:57 David Alan Grier Actually, I got about 100 of them.

48:59 David Alan Grier That's good stuff. You don't need all those. I'm going to give you a post office box, drop some in the mail for old Davey. Now, what we do is we test him. I'm going to have to take a couple of those goofballs down them with some. I like a slow gin fizz. That's an old drink, Dr. Drew. I brought it back with some Vicky's. Boy, you're seeing double like nothing.

49:16 David Alan Grier That sounds like fun.

49:17 David Alan Grier I have a real quick question if I could ask Dr. Drew real quick.

49:20 David Alan Grier Yes, sir.

49:21 David Alan Grier My daughter, when she was little, she had a mega ureter and a urinary reflux.

49:28 Drew Yeah.

49:28 David Alan Grier And so-

49:29 Drew Did they repair that?

49:30 David Alan Grier Yeah, they did. They repaired it before she was a year old. Now, the question I have is like, for the first year after surgery, every six weeks we had to have her down there and they were doing like IEPs, or not, IVPs, VCUGs. So there was like people poking her junk all the time.

49:44 Drew Yeah.

49:45 David Alan Grier Could this cause the same problems? Because I listen to the show pretty regularly and I hear the same, you know, I hear the molestation thing.

49:51 Drew Yes.

49:52 David Alan Grier How old is she?

49:52 David Alan Grier She's nine now. I'm 37, by the way, that you can-

49:57 Drew Yeah.

49:57 David Alan Grier So-

49:58 Drew It can cause things. It doesn't have to cause- It certainly is obviously not an interpersonal trauma in the way it would be if it were, say, your hands or something. But by the same token, it's scary and traumatic. And kids that have childhood illnesses, and think about it, we're not talking to kids that have childhood illnesses on this show.

50:14 David Alan Grier Yeah.

50:15 Drew Right?

50:15 David Alan Grier Yeah. I understand that.

50:16 Drew I was wondering- But listen, there's a lot of kids that have childhood illnesses, and UPJ reflux is not that uncommon a condition, and yeah, it's going to affect her, but it doesn't have the profound effect of the kinds of things we're talking about here.

50:28 David Alan Grier Do you talk to her? Do you get married?

50:30 David Alan Grier Yeah. We sit there the whole time and talk to her about it. She understands. She knows about the surgery. She remembers she has a little scar. She refers to it as her second belly button. Yeah. And we talk to her about the surgery, and she does remember because she would have to go down. She was six when we were finally cleared from the doctor on all the testing and everything, so she doesn't remember a lot. Some of the later testing, but you know, like that first year.

50:54 David Alan Grier What about some family counseling?

50:56 David Alan Grier I'm just wondering if I start seeing things later on, because I hear all these molestation stories, and I hear what these girls are like now.

51:03 Drew My prediction is going to be you're really not going to see much, so she's going to be fine. That's my prediction. It will have an effect. She'll have some something, but you're probably not going to see a global thing like we talk about here.

51:14 David Alan Grier Could it contribute to her having Asperger's syndrome?

51:17 Drew That's an interesting question.

51:19 David Alan Grier Is that when the ass gets really big?

51:21 Drew No, it's a minimal brain syndrome that's in the autistic spectrum. I've noticed that kids that have chemo and things like that get a Asperger's-like thing, but I don't know the literature on that, David, so I couldn't tell you. It might, but I don't know the literature on it. I bet you if we were to search literature, we would find out, no.

51:43 David Alan Grier One child? Just one child?

51:44 David Alan Grier Yeah, just one child.

51:46 David Alan Grier Well, stay healthy, dude.

51:47 David Alan Grier Yeah, well, I'm doing the best I can.

51:49 David Alan Grier I got a good luck with the daughter.

51:50 Drew And I'll see if I can get-

51:52 David Alan Grier You know, Dag, I really want to say, I woke up from recovery. Wow. And laughing.

51:57 David Alan Grier That's cool, man.

51:58 David Alan Grier I was in a dream state, and I could hear the nurses talking about medicine. I could think about your voice was ringing in my head doing that Black Children's Name Get It. And I would just, and like I said, every once in a while, I'd start, you know, you get down, cancer's a tough thing to go through. And you wonder sometimes if the cure is worse than the disease.

52:17 Drew Well, it is. It's a poison. But let me play for you a few moments of Ethel Esadile, which is the progesterone, it's the levonogestrel, or the northendron.

52:38 David Alan Grier So behind.

52:38 David Alan Grier I'm sick of these kids, man.

52:42 David Alan Grier You know, Dr. Drew, I've often said my comedy is really to heal.

52:45 David Alan Grier Yeah, well, look what you've done to me, you know, at times I just get depressed, I go and read my medicine bottles, and I hear you do that. And it really got me through kind of a rough time, and I really, I just wanted to thank you.

52:55 David Alan Grier And I want to thank you for that. This could have been the scariest call I'd ever received. I really didn't know where you were going with that.

53:01 David Alan Grier And thank you, man.

53:02 Drew Thanks, buddy. Good luck. Take care. We got to do a little bit of that tonight, don't you think?

53:07 David Alan Grier Oh my goodness, man.

53:09 David Alan Grier I was scared, man. I didn't know. I didn't know where he was going with that, Dr. Drew. I said, my past come back to me.

53:14 Drew You have trouble taking compliments, don't you?

53:17 David Alan Grier No, no, that was good. No, but well, I know. But you know what? I was trying to hear. I was trying to hear what he was really saying, because, you know, you don't want to hear. I heard everything, man. But, you know, you got crank callers. They're bad people.

53:27 Drew Oh, you're right.

53:27 David Alan Grier You know, and it was it was a wonderful experience. We're talking about it. You know, OK.

53:31 Drew OK, let's go to Lane 21.

53:34 David Alan Grier Hey, hey, Lane, what's up?

53:37 I was wondering what happens to your body physically when you have an orgasm? Like what? Like, I guess the anatomy of it, like what's going on? Why do your muscles bend?

53:48 David Alan Grier That makes sense.

53:49 Drew Yeah, it's it's something that is fairly complex and incompletely understood. Basically, yeah, it's a there's a spinal component to it. And for women especially, there's a what we call super-tentorial input, meaning things up in your brain have input into what goes on in this arousal system. And that and that it's a switch from parasympathetic to sympathetic, the autonomic nervous system sort of switches from hyper stimulation to to hyper inhibition as a point of some sort of critical release. And associated with it are rhythmic muscle contractions, the release of endorphins, and this sort of feeling that the obviously the survival of the species is highly dependent upon.

54:32 David Alan Grier Well, the puddling of the love juices, right?

54:34 Drew The love muck. The baby muck. So it's a complex process. It's not something that we can just say, hey, there's this pathway and that pathway, one turns on, one turns off.

54:43 David Alan Grier Your toes curl.

54:45 Drew Even understanding what happens level of spinal cord is very complex.

54:49 Yeah, definitely more complex.

54:52 Drew What makes you wonder about that?

54:54 I don't know. I was just curious about it. I guess I never learned about it.

54:58 David Alan Grier I don't know.

54:59 Plain curiosity, I guess.

55:01 Drew It's obviously also under the influence of various hormones. Testosterone has an effect on it. Estrogen, progesterone both affect it to some degree. So it's true.

55:10 Caller It's about somebody who have a multiple orgasm rather than just one.

55:14 David Alan Grier You know what causes someone to have that?

55:16 Drew God touches you.

55:17 David Alan Grier God touches you in a very special way, honey. Are you one of those special women?

55:21 Caller Yes.

55:22 Drew God bless you.

55:23 David Alan Grier God bless you. Drew, give her a big gold star. Big gold star.

55:28 Drew Yeah, Lane, so it's interesting that the women like you that have more towards multiple tend to be least interested in oral sex.

55:35 David Alan Grier They don't like oral. That's not always true. I have been with women.

55:40 Drew Not sequential.

55:42 David Alan Grier I'm saying, okay, sequential means one after another.

55:46 Drew Yeah, that's multiple. That's multiple, ratchet fire, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow.

55:49 David Alan Grier You said not sequential, multiple.

55:50 Drew No, the pow, pow, pow ones tend to be the ones that don't like oral sex.

55:55 David Alan Grier Right. Okay, I'm talking about.

55:57 Drew There's some women that have four or five, sort of one after another, and those women also will orgasm with oral sex.

56:02 David Alan Grier Yes.

56:03 Drew Lane is the sort of more pow, pow, pow.

56:05 David Alan Grier Well, why don't you let her say it for herself?

56:07 Drew Well, you say it yourself, Lane.

56:08 David Alan Grier By the way, Dr. Drew, did you wake up with a vagina today?

56:10 David Alan Grier I don't think so.

56:11 David Alan Grier So why don't you let the expert with a cooter tell you how she feels, Mr. Flappy Lipperton, I know everything.

56:17 David Alan Grier Sorry, Laney, go ahead.

56:19 David Alan Grier You got the floor, honey buns.

56:21 Caller Well, I can't do it all the time. It's just like every now and again, I'll have maybe two or three, not like.

56:27 Drew Oh, you're right. Lane is your.

56:29 David Alan Grier Let me ask you something. Could you squeeze one off for us right now and just try a little experiment?

56:34 Caller Yeah, absolutely not.

56:37 David Alan Grier Oh, you would make radio history.

56:40 Caller I know.

56:40 David Alan Grier I know right now.

56:41 David Alan Grier Go honey, go, go.

56:44 Caller Golden opportunity, but I can't take it.

56:47 Drew Yeah, so it's a complex process. It's different in different women. Men are all pretty much the same again, and the influence of the Y chromosome, which has a very limited amount of information on it. Women have two X chromosomes, so there's huge, rich diversity amongst women, and the means by which you orgasm, the quality of the orgasm, whether it's oral sex, intercourse is all genetically determined.

57:05 David Alan Grier Now, do you believe in this, like I actually was dating a girl once who, who said that she had two different kinds of orgasms, like when we first started going out, it was like a more, for lack of a better term, vaginal orgasm, but then later things changed and it became much deeper.

57:24 Drew So first it was a clitoral orgasm, then it was-

57:26 David Alan Grier Exactly, then it was much deeper, and huge, huge, it was huge.

57:32 Drew Did she have fluid come out? Did she ejaculate?

57:36 David Alan Grier Talk to her.

57:37 Drew I'm just asking you to say it's huge.

57:38 David Alan Grier Not her particularly, but what she would tell me that it is completely different, that this was coming from much deeper inside of her. I've also been with women who ejaculated but they didn't know it. I mean, I was down there and I told them, they go, really? That just happened. And I go, yes.

57:55 David Alan Grier Yes, this just happened.

57:57 David Alan Grier Serious. Look at my face. Look at my face, honey. Honey, look at my face. I'm not sweating. This is your issue, my darling.

58:04 Drew Oh my.

58:05 David Alan Grier Little cup of loveliness. Yeah, so I don't, I mean, that's what I'm saying. It's so variable.

58:08 Drew It's all over the place. Right. And as men, we like get very focused on, well, that's a bitter or a better one. We got to give you that one. And they're not necessarily that interested in that. They're interested, they're just, it's different, yeah.

58:19 David Alan Grier She was interested in it because it was deeper. It was more, it was like one, I'll put it like this. She had an orgasm the first time, but the second deeper one, all I'm saying is came from like the inside out. It was much deeper, much longer.

58:34 Drew And she wanted those. She wanted those.

58:36 David Alan Grier It just happened.

58:37 Drew But does she pursue that kind of orgasm? She wanted that or did you, you were like sort of interested in that?

58:43 David Alan Grier You know, I don't recall it being anything we have to go there to do that. It just happened.

58:47 Drew OK.

58:48 David Alan Grier It just happened.

58:49 Drew Because if we're a guy, a guy would be like, OK, this every time. Let's go.

58:51 David Alan Grier But let me tell you something. You know, when you got it like David G.

58:54 Drew Yeah, it doesn't matter. She's happy either way.

58:56 David Alan Grier I'm not saying I'm a hot dog, but I'm close to a banana. You hear what I'm saying? Hey now.

59:02 Drew Jason 26.

59:03 David Alan Grier Slinging it, baby. You know, hurting them, you know, breaking them all.

59:09 David Alan Grier Jason, what's cracking?

59:10 David Alan Grier Well, my wife seems to think that I have a sexual addiction.

59:15 David Alan Grier Oh boy.

59:17 David Alan Grier Like I can have sex with her and then want to get another five minutes later. Pretty much like I can be masturbating, go have sex, masturbate again, keep on going. And her sexual drive isn't so much as mine. It was when we first got together like three years ago. But then she had a kid with me. And it's like things went down. Other problems happened in our relationship.

59:46 Drew What? What happened?

59:48 David Alan Grier Well, my wife keeps on saying, telling me that I've cheated on her three times.

59:53 David Alan Grier Have you ever cheated on her?

59:55 David Alan Grier I didn't cheat on her. We had broken up a couple of times when we were dating.

59:59 David Alan Grier Did she know that you broke up?

1:00:02 David Alan Grier Yeah. She said, that's it. I'm done. I'm leaving.

1:00:04 David Alan Grier Okay. But you were not married.

1:00:06 David Alan Grier No, we weren't married at the time. We were just dating. It happened twice there. And then she had gone away to Indiana to her father's house. And while she was gone, I really hadn't been away from her for a long period of time. Started feeling lonely, depressed, got online, chatted with somebody, and it started going a little further. I never actually did anything with the person, but my wife still considers that cheating.

1:00:32 David Alan Grier But wait a minute, hold on, hold on.

1:00:33 Drew Women do consider emotional cheating, cheating.

1:00:35 David Alan Grier Okay, yeah, but also, is she bringing this up at a time when now after the kid, her libido is lower, she really doesn't-

1:00:44 Drew Sort of blaming it.

1:00:45 David Alan Grier Right, right, they always gonna bring that up when they don't wanna have sex with you. Then it's like, you know, back in 1978, you're looking at my fat sister, Louisa, you know. Yeah, she's gonna bring that up because she knows she doesn't wanna hit it with you. My real question was, in terms of your quote unquote sexual addiction, if you had your druthers, average day, not one good day, how many times could you have sex? If you say average in a five day period. Would you? How many times?

1:01:13 Drew Not could you, but would you?

1:01:14 David Alan Grier Would you, yeah.

1:01:15 David Alan Grier Average, I mean like, back when we were first dating, it was like five, six times a day and I was.

1:01:19 Drew No, no, no, no, no. On your average, what would you do now?

1:01:22 David Alan Grier Oh, on our average now, like maybe.

1:01:26 Drew If she were available, if she were willing, what would your average be?

1:01:30 David Alan Grier If she were available, I'd just like, I'd just like it once a day.

1:01:33 Drew Okay.

1:01:33 David Alan Grier But this is what I'm saying. But you're not sexually addicted.

1:01:36 David Alan Grier It's like once a week. And then like, if I'm.

1:01:40 David Alan Grier There you go.

1:01:40 David Alan Grier It's like during the week, she's like, no, I just don't feel like it. I'm like, okay, well.

1:01:44 David Alan Grier You're obsessing over it, which is normal. The dude, you're obsessing over it.

1:01:47 David Alan Grier I feel like I feel with it with myself and then she gets mad at me for that.

1:01:50 David Alan Grier Right. You're obsessing over it, which makes it a bigger problem.

1:01:53 David Alan Grier She doesn't want to have sex with you.

1:01:54 David Alan Grier So now you're even hornier.

1:01:57 Drew You guys have got some conflicts that needed to be sorted out. Here's a lot of resentments growing.

1:02:02 David Alan Grier That's another problem because my wife left me last Thursday and she moved back to Indiana with her dad.

1:02:08 David Alan Grier And okay, so she left, or she did...

1:02:09 David Alan Grier Me and our son here in California.

1:02:12 David Alan Grier Her son, your son?

1:02:13 David Alan Grier I don't know what to do.

1:02:15 Drew Yes. My parents and some friends telling me, Hold on.

1:02:18 David Alan Grier Don't do it.

1:02:19 David Alan Grier Hold on, hold on. Is her son your son?

1:02:23 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:02:23 David Alan Grier Are you the father of this?

1:02:25 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:02:25 Drew Did her mom abandon her when she was a child?

1:02:29 David Alan Grier Yes. She had a lot of...

1:02:31 Drew So here we go. She's reenacting the hole. She's the circle of life here coming back.

1:02:36 David Alan Grier It wasn't her mom that abandoned her. It was her dad that abandoned her, the person that she's living with now. She just actually met him about six months ago. Where is her mom?

1:02:46 Drew Where's her mom?

1:02:48 David Alan Grier Her mom's here in California. She like lives about two miles away from us.

1:02:53 Drew Why didn't she go live with her mom?

1:02:55 David Alan Grier She doesn't want to. Like her mom...

1:02:57 David Alan Grier Her dad ran away.

1:02:57 Drew All right. Here's the deal, Jason. You got some really sort of... We're talking to people that the surface looks like, oh, they're fighting a little bit. You get down two layers and it's like, oh, oh, oh.

1:03:08 David Alan Grier So, pump the brakes here, Dr. Drew, because I'm confused. You're saying that these kids who call this Loveline, is this what you call this place?

1:03:14 Drew Love.

1:03:14 David Alan Grier Loveline. They're messed up in their heads. Cookie. I didn't know that. I didn't know that.

1:03:20 Drew Fun loving.

1:03:20 David Alan Grier You know what? I thought this. I thought the Loveline is where people call and say, I love you.

1:03:25 David Alan Grier What do you think?

1:03:25 David Alan Grier I'm nuts. I know these people are cokes. That's why I'm here. I'm trying to save them, Dr. Drew.

1:03:30 David Alan Grier You're making me crazy.

1:03:31 David Alan Grier I'm going to have to call a doctor because you're making me crazy. Now we got three people nuts now. You happy?

1:03:38 David Alan Grier Yes, I know they're nuts.

1:03:42 Drew So, Jason and his-

1:03:43 David Alan Grier Look at my back there.

1:03:44 Drew For the meds? For the vikings? Those are Gen Fizmix here. Gen Fiz and Vykes.

1:03:49 David Alan Grier Oh yeah.

1:03:50 David Alan Grier Give me my jammies.

1:03:52 David Alan Grier Give me my Vickies.

1:03:54 David Alan Grier I can't get Danny for a teacher.

1:03:56 David Alan Grier I love my dolls.

1:03:57 David Alan Grier I love you too. Oh, I got to squeeze one off. Oh yeah. Don't look.

1:04:03 David Alan Grier Oh yeah.

1:04:04 David Alan Grier Don't squeeze.

1:04:08 David Alan Grier Okay.

1:04:09 David Alan Grier No, listen, but seriously, he has a lot of bad problems.

1:04:13 Drew Yes. Now, before she took off and the abandonment, most of what I was going to say was you really, on behalf of the child, need to get some couples counseling. It sounds like even more that she needs some real serious treatment.

1:04:24 David Alan Grier Well, first of all, she's going to be back because she just met her dad online.

1:04:28 Drew God knows what he's going to perpetrate on her.

1:04:31 David Alan Grier She'll be back, but he's got to deal with his son. That's the most important thing.

1:04:36 Drew This is a messed up situation, but most of what you were describing was conflicts that can be sorted out provided both you sort of fight fair and get a third party involved to help you sort it out. If you can get some stability in your relationship, you might be able to have a family and raise this child. I suspect your wife is going to need some independent treatment because she sounds like she's got some real issues.

1:04:57 David Alan Grier Well, I think, you know what, if I were you, I'd put the sex thing over to the side if masturbation gets you through the night. Stick with that.

1:05:04 Drew He's not acting out. You're not doing anything wrong with that as long as you're not acting out sexually, meaning making contact with people. If you're just looking at things, whatever, not looking at weird things, by the way.

1:05:13 David Alan Grier What's weird things?

1:05:15 Drew Kids or whatever, you know. And getting illegal things. This is just the way you handle your sexuality, which is fine. But realize that that's normal. And therefore, then your wife's reaction to that is not normal. That's her stuff. And you need to keep it separate from yours. So it's hot in here.

1:05:32 David Alan Grier It's hot, man. Because you know what? When you're healing babies, it gets smoking hot.

1:05:37 Drew I'd like to mention a couple of things.

1:05:38 David Alan Grier Go ahead, man. I'm with you, baby.

1:05:40 Drew Northendrone.

1:05:40 David Alan Grier I love you.

1:05:42 David Alan Grier Northendrone! Northendrone! Don't act like you don't hear me. Bring your behind up in here. Northendrone!

1:05:50 David Alan Grier Come in this house.

1:05:51 Drew Methotrexate.

1:05:52 David Alan Grier Methotrexate! Could you tell me what this is for these on your report card? Methotrexate. This is not the little baby girl I raised. And where's your panty drawers at? I know I didn't send you out the house like that. You better go on back out there and find them in the doggie room, wherever you was at.

1:06:09 Drew Cytoxan.

1:06:10 David Alan Grier Cytoxan.

1:06:11 David Alan Grier Come here. Come here. Look at you.

1:06:12 David Alan Grier Cytoxan.

1:06:13 David Alan Grier Come here.

1:06:13 David Alan Grier Let me give you a hug. I got you now. I got you now.

1:06:15 David Alan Grier I got you now. Don't you ever, don't you ever suck your pees at me again. Now get now.

1:06:22 Drew Ethanil Estradio.

1:06:24 David Alan Grier Ethanil Estradio. I got five reasons that you need to come around here before the streetlights come on.

1:06:35 Drew Oh yeah.

1:06:37 David Alan Grier I love it here on Loveline.

1:06:40 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:06:43 David Alan Grier Michael Powell's an idiot.

1:06:45 Drew 1-800-LLVE-191. More David Alan Grier, more you, more calls, more Loveline after this. That's right, David L. Aguirre, Love Line, 1-800-LOV-191, breaking it down.

1:07:19 David Alan Grier Hey, Dr. Drew, can I come back tomorrow? Yeah. Hey, now, shit-bop-bam-dee-goo.

1:07:23 David Alan Grier Can I come back, what's that, Tuesday?

1:07:26 Drew Is Tuesday after? Yeah.

1:07:27 David Alan Grier Oh, my God. Can I come back Wednesday?

1:07:30 Drew Yes.

1:07:30 David Alan Grier Oh, be do-ry, baby. How about Thursday?

1:07:33 Drew Would you?

1:07:33 David Alan Grier Oh, my God. That would be my pleasure.

1:07:35 Drew I would love that.

1:07:36 David Alan Grier And you know what I would like to do now? I would like to say some apes.

1:07:39 David Alan Grier Okay, here we go.

1:07:40 Drew This is Brooke 20.

1:07:43 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:07:44 Drew Hi, Brooke.

1:07:45 David Alan Grier Hi.

1:07:45 David Alan Grier How are you, baby? What's up?

1:07:47 David Alan Grier How are you guys?

1:07:48 Drew We're having a good time. David's having a... An epiphany. What do you call it? Yeah, a monumental appearance on Loveline.

1:07:56 David Alan Grier Hey, man, let me ask you something. Award-winning. Your kids are how old now?

1:07:59 Drew Thirteen.

1:08:00 David Alan Grier What's the one toy they really want for Happy Quanta Quanta?

1:08:04 Drew You know, iPod Nano.

1:08:07 David Alan Grier I don't... Didn't you give them all the iPods already? You don't give them all those iPods you get?

1:08:11 Drew Well, they've had... No, I had to use the Nano. I only got one.

1:08:14 David Alan Grier The Nano. The Nano is... Oh, my God. That's what they want.

1:08:18 Drew That's what they want.

1:08:19 David Alan Grier They're not into video games or anything like that?

1:08:20 Drew Oh, they want the Xbox 360.

1:08:22 David Alan Grier I want that Xbox 360, man. Did you see that?

1:08:24 Drew Yeah, dude, I've been on the list and trying to find it.

1:08:27 David Alan Grier You know what you should do? You should author a butt-necked sex game, but that Xbox 360 style.

1:08:34 Drew Oh, we'll do it. No, no, no. Oh, dude, you're on to something here. Now, just do a sort of name that STD thing.

1:08:39 David Alan Grier Yeah, show them how to get them, though. Show them how to get them.

1:08:42 Drew Was I Abused? That'll be the name of the game in the game? Yeah, Was I Abused.

1:08:45 David Alan Grier That's right, that's right.

1:08:46 Drew They have an ER, an ER set up. You run through the ER. I like this. If anybody works for Microsoft, give me a call.

1:08:54 David Alan Grier Yes, we got some stuff, but it's gotta be action packed. It's gotta be people, people. Oh, I know how to do that.

1:08:58 Drew Oh, don't worry. I got some ideas.

1:08:59 David Alan Grier You know, it's gotta be some throw down.

1:09:01 Drew I got some.

1:09:02 David Alan Grier Throwing lightning bolts too. And you gotta turbo charge them, you know.

1:09:05 Drew You do some of the voices. I want you to do some of the voices for me.

1:09:08 David Alan Grier Some of the voices, man, please. I want to be a character in that band.

1:09:11 Drew Okay. All right. Done. Brooke, do you want to come on? Yes.

1:09:14 David Alan Grier Hi, I actually have a quick question. You guys were talking earlier about that girl who had an orgasm. And I know this is going to sound crazy, but bear with me. Actually, I was wondering when a girl has an orgasm, you were asking him, oh, did she ejaculate?

1:09:30 David Alan Grier Like, do girls actually come?

1:09:31 David Alan Grier Because I've never had anything like that.

1:09:33 Drew It's a rather, it's a talent that few do. And when they do it, it runs a spectrum. Some of them do it, some of them do it without an orgasm. Some of them do it only with a big orgasm. Some can't tell when they're doing it. It's all over the place. It's usually just sort of glandular fluid down there that gets released with the musculoskeletal tract.

1:09:51 David Alan Grier I'll say that sometimes, just so it makes my boyfriend feel special.

1:09:54 Drew What, what?

1:09:55 David Alan Grier I'll be like, I'm coming, I'm coming, you know, whatever. But then I'm like, I actually never really have the, do girls actually, you know?

1:10:01 Drew Wait, wait, you've never had an orgasm?

1:10:02 David Alan Grier You've never had an orgasm.

1:10:04 David Alan Grier I know, but I don't know.

1:10:06 David Alan Grier Wait a minute, just answer the question.

1:10:07 Drew Orgasm is separate from...

1:10:08 David Alan Grier I swear to God, I am not sure.

1:10:11 David Alan Grier No, no, you haven't had one.

1:10:12 Drew You've not had one.

1:10:13 David Alan Grier I get all, like, it feels good, but I never...

1:10:16 David Alan Grier Oh, that's good. Yeah, I know, that's good, but that's not orgasm.

1:10:19 Drew It will happen.

1:10:20 David Alan Grier I've never... I don't even... I mean, he's...

1:10:22 David Alan Grier Let me put it like this. Let me put it like this. Have you ever broken a bone?

1:10:25 David Alan Grier Okay, come on, no.

1:10:26 David Alan Grier No, have you ever broken your leg, broken your thumb? No. No? You never did that. Have you ever had a cold? Have you ever had a cold?

1:10:32 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:10:33 David Alan Grier You know you had a cold, right?

1:10:35 David Alan Grier Okay, I see what you're getting at.

1:10:36 David Alan Grier No, you know you had a cold, right?

1:10:38 David Alan Grier But, do you walk around going, I think I had a cold.

1:10:40 David Alan Grier I don't really know.

1:10:41 David Alan Grier Like, I felt kind of bad, but was that a cold?

1:10:44 David Alan Grier I don't know.

1:10:45 David Alan Grier Is it a cold, Dr. Drew? I don't know.

1:10:47 David Alan Grier You'll know.

1:10:47 Drew There will be no doubt when you have this. You will not have fluid come out. You will have an orgasm.

1:10:52 David Alan Grier That's right. The fluid is not what that does.

1:10:54 Drew No, the fluid has nothing to do. It's a separate issue. That's right. You may want to sort of experiment within the shower, the tub, the water is a good way to do it, the jacuzzi jets.

1:11:05 David Alan Grier Okay, so that's like how to get an orgasm, but like, so.

1:11:08 Drew Yeah.

1:11:08 David Alan Grier How to get an orgasm.

1:11:10 Drew You're not going to be able to do it with a guy. You're not going to have it during intercourse. It's going to be during oral sex. Right.

1:11:15 David Alan Grier First of all, here's what I think. You, yeah, most women have to find your own level.

1:11:20 Drew Most women do not have an orgasm with intercourse. They have it only with oral sex or some sort of direct stimulation.

1:11:25 David Alan Grier That's about 60% of women.

1:11:27 Drew And that will definitely be you, Brooke, because the women that have orgasms later are the ones that are definitely in that category.

1:11:31 David Alan Grier Usually women, if you can make yourself have an orgasm, you're on the first pass, because if you can't make yourself have an orgasm. You're going to be following along the others.

1:12:10 David Alan Grier Okay, so I'm not crazy.

1:12:12 Drew No, and most, many women, I won't say most, many women don't begin having orgasms until about the age of 18 to 22, and so you're in that category.

1:12:18 David Alan Grier Yeah, I mean, it totally feels great, but I'm never like, wow, this is amazing. No, no, no, you'll relax.

1:12:26 Drew You'll have it. Talk to girlfriends that have it with oral sex. Maybe they can help you out to get there, okay?

1:12:31 David Alan Grier Okay, thank you so much, guys.

1:12:32 Drew Okay, good luck. And then we'll talk to a different biology on that spectrum. This is Julie, who's 24.

1:12:40 Caller Hi.

1:12:41 David Alan Grier Hi, Julie.

1:12:42 Caller How are you?

1:12:43 Caller I'm good. I'm good.

1:12:44 David Alan Grier What's your question?

1:12:46 David Alan Grier My question is, I guess there's a theme tonight about female ejaculation. I, when I have sex, I totally love it. I do have orgasms, absolutely. However, there's been a few times when I'm having sex with a guy and it definitely gets really wet down there and I know. But the problem is that I'm not sure sometimes whether it's actually ejaculation or if it's that like I accidentally pee and I don't know. Like it feels and I'm embarrassed by it because I don't.

1:13:20 David Alan Grier Why would you be embarrassed by it?

1:13:21 Drew I will tell you, Julie, most women that have female ejaculation feel ashamed and embarrassed. It's a strange reaction they had. And before we started talking about Loveline, women just would not talk about it.

1:13:30 David Alan Grier Well, Dr. Drew, I read a statistic that said 30 percent of women, young women in America are afraid to have an orgasm for fear that they will fart.

1:13:43 Drew They'll farting.

1:13:45 David Alan Grier Now, let me tell you something. This is the difference between men and women. If you told a man that he would projectile defecate, for 12 hours straight out of every orifice in his body, what would we say?

1:14:01 Drew What's the problem?

1:14:02 David Alan Grier What's the problem?

1:14:03 Drew If you told him he would explode.

1:14:04 David Alan Grier Exactly. If you told, I talked about that on stage. If you told literally his testicles would explode, we would say, what's the problem? Are they going to go back or what? Because I got to get there. Yeah, you just please. Everything is fine. Has a guy ever stopped and said, what is this?

1:14:24 David Alan Grier He hasn't stopped, but afterwards it's like, did you pee or what happened?

1:14:30 Drew Here's what's going on in the guy's mind is like, oh, I did this? Awesome.

1:14:34 David Alan Grier Well, yeah, that was my one, no. The first time that ever happened to me is I was freaked out. My reaction was her reaction.

1:14:40 David Alan Grier Like you broke her open?

1:14:41 David Alan Grier I just didn't know. It was like someone poured a bucket of water on me or something. I was like, what is this? You know what? It's all good. Your reaction should be, this is for you. I have never, you made me do this.

1:14:53 Drew And the guy goes over the top for that.

1:14:55 David Alan Grier You are that incredible. Make it all positive and it will be positive. But if you sit there going, I don't know, like you're pounding me in the sand, this Icky stuff came out, I'm grossed out too, ew! Yeah, well that's not a good recipe.

1:15:07 Drew Usually not, it's usually not urine because the urinary incontinence usually happens to women that have had babies and the end boy and that is a large volume. I've had patients put down tarps on the bed and the floor. Really? Yes, and this stuff just streams off because the bladder holds a couple cups a liter of fluid.

1:15:25 David Alan Grier Let's move on, shall we?

1:15:26 Drew All right, Julie, thanks for the call.

1:15:28 David Alan Grier Good luck with that, Julie.

1:15:29 David Alan Grier All righty. Julie's a good American name. Julie, we're going to need you to strap that bomb on and go in there and blow something up, Julie.

1:15:35 David Alan Grier How about Ashley?

1:15:37 David Alan Grier Ashley, Ashley. Hi, Ashley.

1:15:40 Caller Hi, so I get a lot of bladder infections almost every time I have sex and I'm just wondering if there's anything I can do, like any medication I have to take to kind of prevent it or make it easier?

1:15:53 Drew Avoid direct trauma. You know what I'm saying?

1:15:57 David Alan Grier What's direct trauma?

1:15:57 Drew Like something pushing directly under your urethra. Like don't do things too, don't do the way you like it.

1:16:02 David Alan Grier Too vigorously.

1:16:03 Drew Vigorous, yes.

1:16:04 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:16:04 Caller Okay.

1:16:05 Drew And take it easy.

1:16:05 David Alan Grier So you don't want to just grab them by the hair and just, you know, bang them in the wall.

1:16:08 Drew Well, you just don't want to push directly on that area if you can avoid it.

1:16:11 Caller Okay. Yes.

1:16:13 Caller So that's what causes it? It's too rough?

1:16:16 Drew Well, it's never too rough. Too direct a pressure.

1:16:19 David Alan Grier So she doesn't want to go out Colby style.

1:16:21 Drew And some women have to take antibiotics all the time to prevent this, or at least every time you have sex. There's a couple ways to do it. One is a sulfa medication. It's typical. There's no one called macrodentin. And if you have more resistant bugs, they might have you take some Cipro or Levoquin each time you have sex.

1:16:37 David Alan Grier Is this with one partner or with any partner? Are you sleeping with more than one person? What's up?

1:16:42 Caller No, I have a boyfriend. So, I mean, ever since I started having sex, I've been getting water infections.

1:16:48 Drew But it's the same guy or different guys?

1:16:49 Caller It's been different guys, but right now it's the same guy.

1:16:52 David Alan Grier They both shouldn't be treated, or should they?

1:16:54 Drew No, this is her urethra getting bacteria pushed up it, basically. And you ought to talk to, you ought to see a gynecologist and ask whether or not you should see a urologist. That's sort of how that goes. This is Jessica 23.

1:17:08 David Alan Grier Yeah, hi. Hi, Dr. I have a question for you.

1:17:11 Drew Yes, ma'am.

1:17:12 David Alan Grier I'm with this guy that we've been together for three years, and you know, we have a son that's two years old. So, everybody thinks of us as a married couple or whatever. But see, you know, I have a problem. I guess, I don't know, I cuss at him too much. And I was wondering, like, if there's any way I could just stop it or anything that I should do or say to myself to make myself stop cussing at him so much, because it gets really, really bad. I mean, we've gotten in so many fights and like, because of my big mouth, you know, I just go off on him and I just cuss at him so much. And, you know, I try not to cuss in front of our son.

1:17:48 Drew Look, it's not the cussing, Jessica, it's the hostility and the aggression.

1:17:51 David Alan Grier I was going to say, is it the language or is it your anger? It sounds to me more like you're saying you have a problem with anger.

1:17:56 Drew Yeah.

1:17:57 David Alan Grier You think so?

1:17:58 David Alan Grier Well, I'm asking you. I'm asking you. I mean, you can use profanity and not be angry. You can use profanity and be happy.

1:18:04 Drew Yeah.

1:18:05 David Alan Grier Excited.

1:18:06 David Alan Grier All right.

1:18:07 Drew You guys in Brooklyn use profanity as punctuation, commas.

1:18:11 David Alan Grier But you're saying that when you use profanity, you were really angry. Is that what you're saying?

1:18:16 David Alan Grier Well, not really. It's just out of nowhere. I just end up saying, oh, you know, f**k you.

1:18:22 Drew Oh, yeah. On the radio, Jessica.

1:18:24 David Alan Grier That is abusive. Way to go. I'm hurt. I feel hurt.

1:18:27 Drew On the radio, Jessica.

1:18:29 David Alan Grier That didn't go over the air, so it didn't.

1:18:30 Drew Well, he's taking it off right now.

1:18:32 David Alan Grier There we go. That's good. She said she had a problem. Don't, don't, you know, we're trying to help her.

1:18:36 Drew Yes, she does have a problem. I think she has Tourette's because she blasted out a big f-bomb right here on the air. But be that as it may, look, Jessica.

1:18:44 David Alan Grier I'm still confused.

1:18:45 Drew Were you physically abused? Were you physically abused growing up? Did I hit you?

1:18:50 David Alan Grier Well, like, my mother, I guess, you know, she used to treat me really bad, but I don't know if that has anything to do with it.

1:18:55 David Alan Grier Would she use language like that with you?

1:18:58 David Alan Grier Um, yeah, she used to when I was a little girl.

1:19:01 David Alan Grier But how did it make you feel when she used that language?

1:19:04 David Alan Grier Well, bad, you know, it just kind of like, it used to make me feel bad, you know.

1:19:08 Drew Have you had boyfriends that treated you like that?

1:19:11 David Alan Grier Um, not really. Like, I've had boyfriends before and I've never used this kind of language with them.

1:19:16 Drew No, but have you had boyfriends that flipped it around and treated you like your mom?

1:19:21 David Alan Grier Um, not, not a lot.

1:19:23 David Alan Grier Well, wait a minute, Dr. Drew, now you just said that you've had other boyfriends that you didn't treat this way. Now, let me ask you something. Is this the first man that you've been with? You're still young, you said you're 23. Um, this is the first person you've been with that you've been this verbally abusive with?

1:19:39 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:19:40 Drew And let me make a prediction. This is the nicest guy she's been with.

1:19:44 David Alan Grier You think so?

1:19:45 Drew Is it, is that not the case?

1:19:47 David Alan Grier No, but he's cheated on me before and like-

1:19:49 Drew I understand, but is he, is he not the sort of, is he very, very nice compared to the other guys?

1:19:57 David Alan Grier Well, yeah, but he also cusses back at me, you know?

1:20:00 Drew Alright, well here's the deal. When you've been in those sorts of chaotic, abusive family systems-

1:20:04 David Alan Grier You called us originally, she said she feels she has a problem.

1:20:08 Drew And here's the deal.

1:20:09 David Alan Grier The problem is she can't listen.

1:20:10 Drew No, and she either becomes the abuser or the abusee or flips back and forth. She's stuck in this cycle of abuse. And this is where domestic violence comes from. And this needs to be treated, Jessica. This is going to unravel. One of these days, you're going to be involved with the guys not so nice, and it's going to really be very serious.

1:20:29 David Alan Grier Follow your instinct. She called you, called in because you said you think you have a problem. You do have a problem. You need to get treatment.

1:20:35 Drew You need to go talk to somebody. Go talk to women, the abuse survivors, their counseling centers out there.

1:20:40 David Alan Grier Let me ask you something, Dr. Drew. Isn't there a pill you were saying before off the air? Is it the cursing pill? The F-bomb pill you can take and it takes the F-bomb out. Only thing is every other curse word goes through. Didn't you tell me there's no pill?

1:20:52 Drew Every other one besides F?

1:20:53 David Alan Grier Yeah. Yeah. There's no medication that just, you know, hi, Dr. Drew. Gee, I'm teed off at you, Mr. Meany Pants. You know, it takes all the anger out.

1:21:02 Drew No, you can't take the... See, one of the ones, the GD, you can't get rid of that one. But the F and BS one will come out. That will come out with a little anti-seizure medication.

1:21:15 David Alan Grier Okay, all right. Yeah, get some... Not medication, get some treatment.

1:21:18 Drew That's F and BS is the one that specifically will come out.

1:21:22 David Alan Grier There's a lot of BS in here.

1:21:23 David Alan Grier I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I'm kidding, a little jokey.

1:21:26 Drew I miss you. I miss two things tonight, David, but we're gonna take a break right now.

1:21:30 David Alan Grier I'm not a machine. I'm gonna be here all week.

1:21:32 Drew You're gonna be here all week, and I appreciate that, but I wanna hear some cheers, and I wanna hear some more songs.

1:21:36 David Alan Grier I don't have any new cheers, my friend.

1:21:39 Drew I may need to do some old ones.

1:21:41 David Alan Grier I don't have no new cheers, brother.

1:21:44 David Alan Grier And I tried to clean those up for the radio. I did the other version.

1:22:07 David Alan Grier Yes.

1:22:08 David Alan Grier I didn't hear it. That's beautiful. I have to edit in my head before I want to get you.

1:22:12 Drew You mean you have cheers at your high school that were foul?

1:22:16 David Alan Grier Let's die something, let's die something, let's die.

1:22:19 David Alan Grier Y'all won the game, now you think you're hot, but we'll win the fight in the pocket lot.

1:22:24 David Alan Grier You know, that's kind of stuff.

1:22:26 David Alan Grier Take off your nid, hey, let's die something.

1:22:29 David Alan Grier You know, stuff like that.

1:22:30 David Alan Grier Yeah, that's what I want to hear. A lot more than, it's on the roof, hey, a honey proof, hey, it's on the table, the black label, it's on my arm, the booms fall, it's in the sky, the valley high, it's on the float, the black coat, you know, all that stuff.

1:22:49 David Alan Grier It was a catalog of Lakers.

1:22:50 Drew Oh, just like that, just like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1800-LOVE-191 is the number, and we'll be right back.

1:23:08 David Alan Grier This is Loveline.

1:23:18 Drew A week of Dag.

1:23:19 David Alan Grier And I'm telling you, Dr. Drew, I'm not going. I'm going to kill babies till they're all healed up and they won't call acting a damn fool no more.

1:23:31 Drew We're going to talk to Laura so David stops the Ethel Merman. Laura 23.

1:23:37 David Alan Grier Laura.

1:23:38 Caller I'm sorry. Did I hear Ethel Merman?

1:23:41 Drew That was her.

1:23:42 David Alan Grier Ethel Merman!

1:23:44 Drew Channeling her.

1:23:45 David Alan Grier That's right, honey. How are you, darling?

1:23:48 Caller Oh, David, hi.

1:23:49 David Alan Grier Hey, baby, how are you?

1:23:50 David Alan Grier I'm great.

1:23:52 David Alan Grier What's the problem?

1:23:53 Caller Oh, I don't have a problem. I just wanted to say hello.

1:23:57 Caller And that I was a contestant on a random act of comedy.

1:24:00 David Alan Grier I want to apologize because the producers repeatedly told me, they said, David, the contestants are afraid of you. There was a game show and they would answer the wrong question. I'd be like, you're stupid. You're stupid.

1:24:12 David Alan Grier You don't know the answer.

1:24:14 David Alan Grier You're like, cut.

1:24:15 David Alan Grier You can't say that.

1:24:16 David Alan Grier Oh, you want to thank me because I rocked the other contestants.

1:24:19 David Alan Grier Oh, hey, well, while we have you on the phone, let me ask you some questions. Do you ejaculate when you achieve orgasm?

1:24:26 David Alan Grier No, I do not.

1:24:27 Drew Was that one of the questions on the game show?

1:24:29 David Alan Grier No, unfortunately, no. Do you have, are you able to achieve multiple orgasms?

1:24:35 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:24:36 David Alan Grier Oh, yeah. There you go. Is it like constant or is it just one after?

1:24:40 David Alan Grier No, it's just, I think it's similar to a guy.

1:24:43 Caller Like, I just have to rest, you know?

1:24:47 Caller And start again.

1:24:48 Drew Yes, yes, yes, ma'am.

1:24:49 David Alan Grier Nap time, nap time. Then you come up.

1:24:50 Caller Yeah, nap time.

1:24:51 Drew And you have it primarily with, primarily oral sex or intercourse? Orally oral. There you go. And good times.

1:24:59 Caller I really like hand up.

1:25:01 Drew Oh, interesting.

1:25:02 David Alan Grier You like when the guy does that to you?

1:25:04 Caller Yeah.

1:25:05 David Alan Grier I love it.

1:25:05 Drew Now, that's just interesting. Why, why? Tell us about that.

1:25:09 Caller I don't know.

1:25:10 David Alan Grier I don't know.

1:25:10 Caller I like both, but...

1:25:12 David Alan Grier Are you able to express that to the guy you're with?

1:25:15 Caller Yeah.

1:25:15 Drew Is it because you have more intense orgasm that way?

1:25:18 David Alan Grier Because why?

1:25:19 Drew Your orgasm is more intense that way?

1:25:21 Caller It is, yeah.

1:25:23 David Alan Grier Well, you know, because somebody else is doing it. Making you the bad, dirty little girl you are.

1:25:28 Drew But it's a tiny little area.

1:25:30 David Alan Grier I know, but you can learn. You got to practice, right?

1:25:32 Drew What's that, Laura?

1:25:33 David Alan Grier I think it's easier than all.

1:25:37 Caller I mean, I don't know, but it seems easier.

1:25:39 David Alan Grier That's nice. That's nice. That's nice. You know, honey, if I didn't have a girlfriend, I would take you, bend you over a chair and do have dirty things. I'd make you do what I wanted you to do.

1:25:49 Drew Oh, that's so... And you'd be romantic, romantic, sweet.

1:25:53 David Alan Grier You'd be a winner. That's after dinner. That's after church. I'm not just going to come in there and like, freeze, get your droll down. No, I'm not going to Kobe you, baby. I'm going to take you out to dinner.

1:26:03 David Alan Grier Kobe you?

1:26:04 Drew Oh my God.

1:26:05 David Alan Grier I'm not ripping flesh with my manhood.

1:26:08 David Alan Grier Well, anyway, it's wonderful to talk to you again, my dear. Hopefully we'll see you soon in your many endeavors. And I'm glad you rocked the house.

1:26:18 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:26:19 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:26:20 David Alan Grier Bye bye, honey.

1:26:22 Drew Bye bye. Forest 18.

1:26:24 David Alan Grier I'm reaching people.

1:26:24 Drew You're helping me.

1:26:25 David Alan Grier Hey, Forest, are there a lot of trees where you live?

1:26:27 David Alan Grier Look out.

1:26:29 Drew Oregon.

1:26:30 David Alan Grier You know what I said? I said trees because his name is Forest. Good stuff.

1:26:36 David Alan Grier Yeah, I get it. I know.

1:26:38 David Alan Grier Okie dokie. Wow.

1:26:39 Drew He's laughing. He's laughing.

1:26:41 David Alan Grier Yeah.

1:26:41 David Alan Grier OK, Forest.

1:26:42 David Alan Grier But it's time to be serious now.

1:26:44 David Alan Grier OK, let's bring it down. Bring it down a thousand, Drew. Forest, you're next. What's going on?

1:26:48 David Alan Grier Well, it's kind of an embarrassing problem. I have a hard time talking about it.

1:26:52 Drew That means this is bogus. But go ahead and do it anyway.

1:26:54 David Alan Grier Not necessarily. We'll see. What is the problem?

1:26:56 Drew Forest, you know the universal bogosity rules.

1:27:01 David Alan Grier No, I don't.

1:27:02 David Alan Grier Alright, what's your question?

1:27:03 Drew Go ahead and ask the question.

1:27:05 David Alan Grier Okay, well, the thing is, I'll start from the beginning. For a long time, I wasn't sure if I was straight or gay. Because, you know, I would be like attracted to women and then like I would watch gay porno to see, you know, if I was gay.

1:27:19 David Alan Grier Why? What would make you want to watch great gay porno?

1:27:22 David Alan Grier Well, first of all, it had a funny name. It was Men in Black Men. And I liked Men in Black.

1:27:27 David Alan Grier See how bogus this is. Did you write this?

1:27:30 David Alan Grier This is really bad.

1:27:32 Drew Well, go ahead, finish it up.

1:27:34 David Alan Grier Okay, well, then I realized that I could really only get excited by asphyxiating small animals.

1:27:41 Drew Oh, yeah, right.

1:27:43 David Alan Grier Okay, there's got to be a through line at the end.

1:27:46 Drew You know, like a bukkake?

1:27:48 David Alan Grier Well, no, he hit like Men in Black, Black men, animals. And okay, so and after the asphyxiation, what do you do? What do you do then?

1:27:56 David Alan Grier Well, I don't really know what to do with the animals. I usually just like bury them.

1:28:01 David Alan Grier And then what do you do?

1:28:03 David Alan Grier What do you wait?

1:28:03 Drew What's the next? What's the next feature?

1:28:06 David Alan Grier Forrest, Forrest, let me tell you something. We have 10 minutes to save some babies and you're blocking my flow. Come on, get to the point.

1:28:12 Drew The universal rule is when we call it bogus, you're required to admit it.

1:28:15 David Alan Grier Just get to the point, man. What is it?

1:28:17 David Alan Grier Okay, well, I need to know how to stop because I'm feeling bad for killing all these animals and I don't know.

1:28:22 David Alan Grier Just stop. Don't kill anything you don't need. Next caller, next caller.

1:28:26 Drew There's a horrible actor.

1:28:27 David Alan Grier Morgan Freeman on 60 Minutes, a marvelous actor. He would never, he would never perpetrate like that.

1:28:32 Drew No.

1:28:32 David Alan Grier Man is flawless. You know what he said you do with racism? Stop talking about it.

1:28:38 David Alan Grier That's what we'll put it away.

1:28:39 David Alan Grier Yeah, that's what will end racism. Next caller.

1:28:42 Drew Val, 24. Do you like him?

1:28:45 David Alan Grier He's a great actor. Hello.

1:28:48 Drew Hello.

1:28:48 David Alan Grier How are you, Val?

1:28:49 Caller I'm great. I have a question for you, Dr. Drew.

1:28:52 Drew Yes, ma'am.

1:28:53 Caller I've been seeing this guy for about seven months and I'm 24, he's 39. We have a really good time together. We have fun and we go out and do all the normal things like we're dating. But I know for a fact that he's seen other people while we've been dating. I've been pretty faithful. I've been faithful and I haven't seen anybody.

1:29:19 Drew But he's been straight with you. I don't know about faithful or not faithful.

1:29:22 David Alan Grier Hold on. What kind of relationship is it? Let her get to the question, Mr. Budinsky.

1:29:26 Drew I'm just saying she called it.

1:29:28 David Alan Grier Let's let her finish. Go ahead, honey.

1:29:30 Caller Well, he used to say that not necessarily that he loved me, but he wanted to be with me.

1:29:38 David Alan Grier Jeez, what is the point? Get to the point.

1:29:41 David Alan Grier What is your question?

1:29:43 Caller I don't know what to do. I want to take it to the next level, but I don't think he's there.

1:29:47 David Alan Grier Here's what you do. The next time you see him, you say, I only want to date you. I only want to date you. I want to be in a committed, monogamous relationship. Is that what you want? Because this is what I need from this point forward.

1:30:04 Drew No, no, no, not is that what you want? Can, is that where we're going? Is that a possibility?

1:30:09 David Alan Grier Is that what, yeah, just are we working for the same thing? But you gotta stick to your gun. You just have to put it there and say, look, this is what I want. If you cannot, if you're not on the same page with me, then I need to let you go and go find that person.

1:30:21 Drew And realize, be very careful. This guy could be the kind of a-hole that would say, oh, we're heading in that direction just to keep you in the limbo you're in, because he likes having sex with you.

1:30:29 David Alan Grier She'll find out.

1:30:30 Drew I'm just saying, just be prepared that you use your instincts on this. If you think he's BS and you get out, but if you think he's really ready to move along, move this up. And hopefully, God willing, he'll be somewhat honest with you and tell you what he's doing. But this kind of thing usually doesn't move along. There's a reason.

1:30:47 David Alan Grier It could, but the point is this. The point is this, a lot of girls mostly think that they never really have that talk.

1:30:54 Drew I know.

1:30:55 David Alan Grier They just kind of feels like they're going there.

1:30:57 Drew Because they're afraid of what the guy is going to say, which is-

1:30:59 David Alan Grier Right, but then they're going, but I thought because it felt like, no, you have to say plainly.

1:31:03 Drew Guys will tell you.

1:31:05 David Alan Grier You have to say plainly, like, oh, my girlfriend, she says, we're not picking up hookers anymore. And I'm like, what is this? We're going in a different direction, David.

1:31:13 Drew I'm going to consult David Angrier during the break.

1:31:16 David Alan Grier And I had to accept that, Dr. Drew, because, you know, I was saying, you know, you just throw this on me.

1:31:20 David Alan Grier There's a hooker here now.

1:31:22 David Alan Grier We what are we going to do?

1:31:23 Drew We'll be right back.

1:31:24 David Alan Grier Because I like hookers.

1:31:26 David Alan Grier I like hoards. Call Loveline 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:31:37 Drew David Angrier, I had such a good time tonight. You were a brilliant breath of fresh air. How about you come back tomorrow night?

1:31:46 David Alan Grier I only have one thing to say. I would love to.

1:31:49 Drew Oh, that is, I am so glad. I cannot wait till tomorrow night. I can't wait for 22 hours to get back on here and get on the air with you.

1:31:55 David Alan Grier You know what? Let's not go off.

1:31:56 Drew Next caller!

1:31:57 David Alan Grier All right.

1:31:57 Drew Until then, it will be Dr. Drew and Doug. Tomorrow night, saying good night and stay well.

1:32:03 David Alan Grier This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Sunday, December 18, 2005