Episode 1000669588708

0:57 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience.

1:02 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.

1:09 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:21 Adam Hey, yo, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. It's the best of Loveline. Dr. Drew, board-certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. First, a quick rundown of who's going to be on the show tonight. The band The Darkness, Dave Navarro is in here tonight. Elisha Cuthbert, you know her from the Hottie Blonde Neighbor movie. Wild Boys are going to be here. Steve-O and Chris Pontius. Korn in tonight, Jonathan Davis of Korn. And we start off with a controversial band.

1:48 Drew Yes, really the best of. It's an interesting patch with this, right?

1:53 Adam Yeah, because here's a band that came in, got offended and stormed out. So I don't know how they made it on the best of, but engineer Anderson swears us it's entertaining. So please enjoy.

2:05 Well, it's not the best. Let me interrupt you. It's not the best guest necessarily, but the best moments.

2:10 Drew We only want the best moments.

2:11 Adam The best moment. Please enjoy the train wreck known as The Darkness. Hey, everybody. Quite down, Drew. It's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Dr. Drew, board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. The Darkness is here tonight. Dan and Frankie are first in the studio. This is nice. You've never seen Dr. Drew.

2:37 I've never. It's nice to finally see your face.

2:40 Adam You've never heard of Dr. Drew either.

2:44 Oh, I thought we were in with Dr. Dre.

2:46 Adam No, I've never seen Dr. Drew. Never seen myself?

2:48 Drew No, no.

2:48 Adam All right.

2:49 I've heard a lot about you guys.

2:50 Adam Because Dr. Drew is a huge C slash D level celebrity here in the state. So it's surprising that you've not caught.

2:58 Well, we are too.

2:59 Adam Caught wind of him over the pilot.

3:01 Drew Finally, we've crossed.

3:03 Adam Fantastic.

3:05 We are C-list United.

3:07 Adam We're going to hear something in the first hour and second hour from the Darkness CD Permission to Land.

3:16 Our purpose on this earth, if you exclude the music, is to bring people together. And we put ourselves in that. That's the challenge that we rise to.

3:26 Adam Not the old people though.

3:27 Yeah. No, no. Of course we do. Yeah. We have not just parents bring the kids to shows, we have grandparents bring the grandchildren to shows. Really? We do. Don't ask me why. I'm not a sociologist. I may well have been if I hadn't chosen music. But the fact is that we do. Don't ask me why. I'm not glotting. I'm not bragging.

3:45 Adam But that's kind of nice.

3:46 We bring people together.

3:48 Adam Well, and people aren't going to grow out of your music, like, I don't know, Limp Bizkit or something.

3:53 Oh, cruel.

3:54 Adam True.

3:54 True, of course.

3:55 Adam And now, I mean, this year, debut CD, but you've been to the States before. You've played in the States before.

4:01 Yeah, we came here as an unsigned band two years ago, first of all, we did SXSW, and unfortunately, no one wanted to know us. However, we came knocking again a year later, and it's just been like step-by-step guide, and third time lucky this year, you know, it's gone like a dream.

4:19 Adam Well, we're going to hear something. As soon as we get the clean version of the darkness CD.

4:25 Hang on, it's gone, it's gone, Tim.

4:27 Adam We'll be hearing that, and now we'll go to the phones. All right, so here's how the show works. Young kids call in trouble, and we make fun of them. Kelsey, but we unite, we bring people together, and then we bring them together, and we make fun of them. Kelsey?

4:42 Caller Hello?

4:43 Adam You're 18?

4:44 Caller Yes, I am.

4:45 Adam What's up?

4:47 Caller Well, me and my friend kind of had this bet, and we were wondering what side you and Drew would be on, and I'm a virgin, and he says it's unhealthy for me to be a virgin, and I don't think so, so.

5:00 Adam Yeah, the hymen can go cancerous, yes Drew?

5:03 Drew No, Adam.

5:03 Adam Get a vagusectomy or something. That's what happened to my sister, I'm pretty sure.

5:07 Drew Well, poor dear.

5:09 Adam No.

5:09 Drew But no, there's nothing unhealthy about that.

5:11 Adam That's probably a little bit healthier, right?

5:12 Drew Absolutely. If you want to know, if you, but Kelsey, if you want to know why you would be healthy, listen to this show for 20 minutes, and you immediately avoid all the hell and chaos that so many of our college go through, right? There you go. All right.

5:24 Adam Is he trying to have sex with you?

5:26 Caller Yes.

5:27 Drew Cool to see you.

5:28 Caller So this is for Catholic?

5:29 Adam This is what you call lose-lose for him.

5:31 Drew Yeah, he's begging her to reconsider.

5:34 Adam You're 18.

5:36 Caller Yes.

5:37 Adam You're a virgin.

5:38 Caller Yes.

5:39 Adam Are you Catholic?

5:40 Caller I am indeed.

5:41 Drew Because you're learning a good lesson about male friends. Male friends are your friends at your age for a reason. They're waiting around. They're just biding their time.

5:51 Caller Thank you.

5:51 Adam The vultures, yes.

5:53 Caller I find that very harsh.

5:54 Caller There's a way around that, isn't there, if you're a Catholic, that you were telling me about?

5:57 Caller Well, there's only two ways of looking at this, actually. Not just one way, two ways. Cobwebs grow in unused corners and crevices. And where there's cobwebs, there's often spiders. And you have to choose if your boyfriend is a spider or a scorpion.

6:18 Caller There's a choice between a spider and a crab. Almost.

6:23 Adam Hey, Kelsey?

6:24 Caller What?

6:25 Adam Okay. Sorry about that. They're from England.

6:29 Caller No, Kelsey, I think it's awful for a man to behave in such an insensitive way. So I think you should possibly explain a little bit more if you don't mind.

6:38 Adam Yeah, and he wants to have sex with you, right? Is he interested in you as a girlfriend?

6:44 We already did that, actually.

6:46 Adam Right. He just wants to have sex.

6:48 Drew Oh, he just wants sex.

6:49 Adam All right, you want to bet and tell him he's going to win the Blue Balls bet, okay?

6:54 Okay, thank you.

6:55 Adam What happened to Blue Balls, Drew? We don't hear about it much anymore.

6:57 Drew Oh, no, I do. When I go to college campuses, they're still talking about it. Oh, yes. To some extent, of course, it exists. It's lymphatic and venous congestion.

7:05 Adam You just don't hear about it so much.

7:06 Drew For the most part, it is a point of contention for manipulation.

7:10 Adam Do you guys have Blue Balls in England? I mean, if so, what do you call them? Well, it's a syndrome.

7:15 Caller The only time I've had Blue Balls is after I've had a game of football, a game of soccer.

7:20 Adam Oh, we actually black and blue.

7:21 Caller In December.

7:22 Adam Oh, I see. Cold. Yeah. You get a shin in the nuts. No, but do they use the term Blue Balls in England?

7:28 Caller No, I've never heard of them. What does it mean?

7:30 Adam No. Okay, we'll tell you. Like, let's say you've been with a chick and you've been making out the whole night, but you never get to go to the next level. So it's five hours of just sort of feverish, dry humping.

7:41 Drew Tension, but no release.

7:43 Adam That's right. Congestion down there.

7:45 Caller And the balls go blue.

7:47 Drew Well, they call them that.

7:49 Adam Yeah.

7:50 Caller Well, I think I'd probably knock one out before they...

7:52 Adam Yeah. Well, one would think... Well, you're... You know, the band's doing well now, so don't worry.

7:56 Caller Yes.

7:57 Adam Don't worry.

7:57 Caller It's not...

7:57 Adam I'm just saying before, you know, like when you guys were doing South by Southwest a few years ago, it's hard to knock them out because you can't find a partner. All right. You ready to move forward here, Drew?

8:08 Drew Germany or Florida?

8:08 Adam Okay. This is a game that I'll be goddamned if this hasn't made it across the pond, Drew. This is called Germany or Florida. All bizarre stories either emanate from Germany or Florida. All the morose and the macabre, all the strange... It's usually acts of crime. From Germany or Florida, people call in, they tell us a story, and we guess. Is it Germany or Florida? Will?

8:31 Caller Yeah.

8:31 Hi.

8:32 Caller What's happening? Things are sick and twisted.

8:35 X-Men and death fetishes, both of them have got these. Guaranteed not to bore you, Germany or Florida.

8:41 Caller All right.

8:42 Adam Go ahead, Will.

8:43 All right. First of all, Adam, you're an amazing man.

8:46 Adam Thank you.

8:46 If I did believe in God, you'd be him. Dr. Drew, really smart man. My mom and dad are both doctors, so anyway.

8:56 Drew So you never see them, sorry.

8:59 The naked body of a 27-year-old man was found draped across the back of a killer whale in a whale tank on the morning of July 6th. He had apparently hidden in the zoo after closing time to try and paint one of the whales with his computer programming company when he drowned in this cold, salty water of the tank. The 14-year-old whale may have played with the man's body as if it were a toy. The whale bit the man's groin while the whale was trying to take his green shorts off. The shorts were found at the bottom of the tank, Germany or Florida.

9:32 Adam Wow.

9:32 Drew Let's figure this one out.

9:33 Adam How are we going to think now?

9:35 Drew Well, you'd think Florida because they have lots of those marine land, but he let a little clue go. He said it's a zoo.

9:41 Adam He didn't call it a marine park or something like that. Interesting.

9:45 Drew Already, they would never call a place in Florida with a killer whale a zoo.

9:50 Adam Interesting. Also, I feel like we would have heard about it if it was over here.

9:55 Drew But then computer.

9:57 Adam It's tough. I'm going Germany on this one.

10:00 Drew Germany.

10:01 Adam Frankie.

10:01 Caller I got Florida.

10:02 Drew Florida.

10:03 Adam Good. Dan.

10:04 Caller Yeah, Florida.

10:05 Adam Florida. Florida. All right. We got to Germany to Florida. Wow. It's heating up.

10:11 Drew Very excited.

10:13 Wow.

10:14 All right.

10:14 Adam Here we go.

10:15 Will.

10:16 Yeah.

10:17 Adam Germany or Florida.

10:18 It was Florida.

10:19 Adam Oh, wow.

10:21 Drew Well done.

10:22 Adam British invasion, everybody. Beating us at our own game. That's like once in a while when the Japanese beat us at baseball. It's smart. It's our game. It's Germany or Florida. This is our game. You understand?

10:34 Caller I heard tonight that whale meat actually tastes quite nice.

10:37 Adam Oh, really?

10:38 Caller And can be to make a delicious meal.

10:43 Adam I wonder if killer whale tastes worse than sperm whale.

10:47 Drew Well, killer whale is not a whale. It's a dolphin, basically.

10:49 Adam Oh, it is?

10:49 Drew Yeah. It's in that family.

10:51 Adam It's got the word whale right in the title.

10:53 Drew I know.

10:53 Adam You know what I mean?

10:54 Drew I know.

10:55 Adam So it's not a whale.

10:56 Drew Sperm whale is not actually a sperm, even though it's right in the name.

11:00 Caller Killer whales do kill things. Other whales don't, unless you count plankton as things, which you shouldn't.

11:06 Caller Yeah. You know, if you crossed a sperm whale with a blue whale, you would have blue balls, wouldn't you?

11:15 Adam What were we talking about? Sperm whales on the show?

11:18 Drew Why they're called sperm.

11:19 Adam Yeah. That's good times. All right. Let's talk to Lola, who's a boy, Drew. We got to get back now with this German air, Florida.

11:27 Drew I know we're out.

11:29 Adam Lola?

11:29 Yeah.

11:30 Adam You're 15? What's up?

11:33 Caller Well, all right.

11:34 I've been bulimic ever since probably around last November. I got caught smoking pot. And so basically my parents were really like disappointed in me. And I got kind of upset about all that. And I got out of a really bad relationship. So I was upset about that. I became bulimic. About two months ago, I started dating this 17 year old and he basically wanted something really serious and I was not ready for that. I didn't want that. So I broke things off of him and he ever since then, he's constantly been nagging me, like calling my cell phone constantly, calling my house constantly, calling my friends, trying to get a hold of me.

12:18 Drew What's the question, Lola?

12:19 Well, I want to know, like I wasn't throwing up for a long time, like while I was with him. But now that we're over and he's got me so stressed, I've started again.

12:31 Drew Do you cut? Are you cut or also?

12:34 No, no.

12:35 Drew Okay. When people cut and purge tends to be at times of extreme stress, right? It's a way, it's a bid for affect regulation, the bid to try to control overwhelming feelings.

12:45 Yeah, I think that's what it is.

12:48 Drew Of course that's what it is, but Lola, here's the deal. Whenever you become distressed, these symptoms are going to get worse. And the problem is, bulimia is a chronic condition, is a potentially fatal condition. It has a specific treatment and you've got to get it cared for. Does your family know you're bulimic?

13:02 Adam Germany, I'm in Germany.

13:03 My mom does.

13:05 Drew All right, and why don't they take you to some care, right?

13:08 My mom's taken me before, and that's what stopped me. I went to the doctor.

13:13 Drew Don't worry yet. Talk to the team that's taking care of you about this guy that's being such a pain in the ass. Don't worry about him. He will be fine. You've got to focus on taking care of yourself because this is a very, very serious condition. Can't imagine.

13:24 Adam You've got a daughter. Way do you get some horny 18-year-old coming around.

13:28 Drew Here's what you know about her. Her dad is probably abusive and that's why she picked the abusive guy and that's why she's stuck in the cycle of abuse again.

13:34 Adam Is he abusive or sort of that?

13:36 Drew The first guy was, she said, was sort of treat her the way she didn't want to be treated kind of thing.

13:41 Adam Lola?

13:41 Caller Yeah.

13:43 Adam Is your, was your dad abusive?

13:45 No, no, not at all.

13:49 Adam Where is he? Is he around?

13:51 Caller No, he's sleeping.

13:53 Drew Why did you pick a guy that was such, you said you were in a bad relationship. Yeah. Why did you pick that kind of guy?

13:59 I don't, I'm not really sure. I met him through one of my friends and it was kind of like we liked each other for a while and it was like he was really nice in the beginning but I really didn't see like his true colors till we were dating for a while.

14:11 Drew That's that, yeah, whatever. But there's something there, Lola.

14:13 Adam Eish for 15. You get hooked up. All guys are really cool at the beginning. It's hard to tell the weirdos. I was watching this.

14:21 Drew You know the Spidey sense people have. They'll find it.

14:24 Adam What about the Spidey in the Vaginae we were talking about?

14:27 Drew That was the webs in the Spidey.

14:29 Adam Spidey sense something else. I was watching this Ted Bundy. You guys know Ted Bundy, the serial killer we got out here?

14:36 Brings a bell. Brings a bell.

14:38 Adam Get up. Yeah, we got, oh yeah. We're thick. We're going to start exporting them. As a matter of fact, we got too many serial killers out here. Just actually white guys who dress nice, loners, quiet, they'd fit right in. Invisible people. Invisible people. Yeah. But some of these guys are nice looking and they have a real rap. As a matter of fact, the sociopaths-

15:01 Drew Sociopaths are very pleasant.

15:03 Adam Sociopaths have a huge rap. They come across actually much better than I do.

15:07 Drew Way better.

15:08 Adam Way better.

15:09 Caller Yeah.

15:09 Drew They make you feel good.

15:11 Adam Yeah. I mean, it makes one feel good.

15:14 Drew Right.

15:14 Caller Yeah.

15:15 Caller So how come in Hollywood flicks is always the English sociopath?

15:19 Adam Yeah. Something happened where we used- For a while, we just made the villains- Well, first, we made them Nazis because that's easy. Then later on, we made them Russians. Then for a while, we got a little confused and weren't sure what direction to go. So we just-

15:35 Drew So we made them suspect.

15:36 Adam We went with the Brit for a while. Then we went with the Middle Eastern, but not quite sure where and it could have been sort of a cross between a Vietnamese and it's like a little Cambodian and a little Vietnamese and then some crazy Middle Eastern stuff going on. And then we just decide, let's just get a really good looking diabolical British accent guy. Because you know the thing I was thinking about too, most villains are really handsome. Where in real life, I don't think villains are as attractive.

16:07 Caller Exactly.

16:07 Adam You know what I mean?

16:11 Caller Guys have to lure their prey. That's exactly right. There's going to be, I mean it's not all about looks, is it? It's going to be quite charming.

16:18 Drew I was having a discussion that at the hospital, we were talking about how women tend to see the emptiness and pain in the sociopathic males and men tend to see the pain in the borderline females. And so they try to rescue the women.

16:28 Caller Yeah. And the women.

16:30 Drew And the women seem to be drawn to the men. They sort of tune into that pain.

16:34 Caller Isn't it beautiful? It's God's way. Yeah.

16:36 Adam Well, let me defend Hollywood just a little bit more. The English guys that are the criminal masterminds, you know, they're not just thugs.

16:44 Drew They're smart.

16:44 Adam They're geniuses. They've used their genius for evil. We recognize them as highly evolved.

16:50 Drew In this country, an English accent denotes genius. Yeah, it makes you smart, just media.

16:55 Caller I think it's the chicken and the egg, actually. I think it's because they're Shakespearean actors who are versed and able to play the villain because of the roles in English theater.

17:04 Adam It's interesting. I never thought about that, but yeah. Yeah. And so they're diabolical, which is much better than just being brilliant. All right. What are we going to do? Hear a song? Let's take one call and then we'll hear a song. Cool. All right. This is Elisha who's 15. Elisha?

17:23 Caller Yeah.

17:24 Adam You're 15? You lost your virginity?

17:29 Caller When I was nine.

17:30 Adam When you were nine to a 36-year-old guy?

17:32 Drew Yeah.

17:33 Adam You were perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

17:35 Drew Yeah. Welcome to America, gentlemen. That would not be losing one's virginity. That would be being the victim of sexual abuse, Elisha, right?

17:45 Well, it was more like seduction because I didn't fight back or anything.

17:50 Drew No, no. At nine, you can't fight back. You can't make choices.

17:54 Adam Look, yes, you could scratch somebody if you wanted to, but the point is...

17:59 Drew When you have an older person there...

18:01 Adam You have no copability here. This guy was a criminal, pure and simple. Okay, it's sad that you feel like you have some responsibility.

18:11 Drew Or anything to do with this experience.

18:13 Adam Yeah, even the fact that you feel like you have 10% responsibility just because you didn't kick and scream is ridiculous.

18:20 Drew One of the things that hams a list is that when you're being sort of neglected at home, I don't know if this is your story or not, but you'll see the attention by this adult, even though it's sort of hard to understand and shattering in its own way, is so satisfying because it's somebody showing you love and attention.

18:37 Caller That's exactly what happened.

18:38 Drew Yeah, and so you feel guilty for that and you feel overwhelmed that you somehow brought this on yourself or you participated in it.

18:44 Adam Who was the guy, by the way?

18:45 Drew It's okay that for God's sakes you felt some human hand as being sort of caring and connecting to you, but the fact is this guy was a bad guy and a criminal. And be careful now, you're going to be drawn to people like this. It's sort of in your wiring now.

18:58 Adam Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where did you meet this guy?

19:01 Campland on the Bay.

19:03 Oh, okay.

19:04 Adam Yeah, we get out that way. I have no idea where that is.

19:07 I go there.

19:08 It's in San Diego. I go there every Fourth of July.

19:11 Drew It's a camp?

19:12 Yeah.

19:13 Adam And what does he do?

19:15 I have no. He was just there the one week that I was there. So I haven't seen him since.

19:21 Adam Is a camper or a counselor?

19:23 Caller Huh?

19:24 Drew As a counselor or something?

19:25 Adam What was he doing there?

19:27 Caller He was walking on the beach?

19:29 No, it's a campground. It's a family campground.

19:31 Drew I see. He was just a predator.

19:32 Adam He was just a camper?

19:34 Yeah.

19:35 Drew It's the beach, dude. It's free-spirited. Relax. Come on. You're too uptight, Adam. Come on.

19:40 Adam I pray this guy got like a rusty s'more put up his ass or something for a camping-related accident.

19:49 Drew He was sexually abused. Good.

19:53 Adam Do you have to?

19:54 Drew Pretty much. How do you get that hankering otherwise?

19:56 I don't... Yeah.

19:57 Adam Well, hold on a second. As a guy... Okay. If you're a 35-year-old guy and you're going after 10-year-old boys, there's a good chance you were sexually abused when you were young.

20:07 Drew Yes. Yeah. That's what goes with that.

20:09 Adam All right. That goes without saying. But if you're a 35-year-old guy is going after a 9-year-old chick...

20:14 Drew Usually. It's physically...

20:15 Adam Can't you just be sort of good and effed up?

20:17 Drew Yeah. But usually there's something like that in there. Some heavy-duty physical abuse. Something to make him attracted to that, to need to fuse to that age group. And his source of pain is around that same time of development.

20:31 Adam Elisha?

20:31 Caller Yeah? What?

20:33 Adam Tell whoever just came in here not to slam the goddamn door. Elisha? Yeah? You're... Okay. So you're 15. This is... Have you got any therapy for this?

20:43 Caller I actually just started therapy. But what's been going on since I was nine was I've always hung out with older guys. And so I had sex a lot after that because I just thought it was like the normal, casual thing to do. And my question was that I've never had an emotional attachment to any one person that I've had sex with.

21:03 Drew Right.

21:04 Caller Because like usually, like, I just first meet them and we agree to just have sex.

21:09 Drew While, Elisha, you will sexualize lots of your feelings, it's going to be very difficult.

21:14 Yeah, I, that's right.

21:15 Drew You've got to just, listen, you've got to have a little, it's like any other compulsion or addiction. You've got to stop, start working on things a little bit, start experiencing a broader range of feelings without falling back on this old way of doing things. So you can build the possibility for connecting with people and having real relationships.

21:30 Adam Yeah. It'd be nice. I want, okay, how come, it'd be nice if bad things happen to guys who did this kind of stuff.

21:37 Drew Absolutely.

21:38 Adam And I don't know if they ever do. Where's the God? Where's everybody? Shouldn't bad things, I bet this guy's probably won the lottery a couple of times since he raped this nine year old.

21:48 Drew Just serves goes to camps.

21:49 Adam All right. So listen, get some therapy. Please stop acting out. Sorry for what happened to you. The darkness is here tonight. We should hear a song, but now we're running late. We got some band questions. Let's take a quick question for the band. Then we'll take a break. Then we'll come back. Then we'll hear a song. Then we'll talk to more people. Then I'll go to the bathroom, probably number one. Then we'll take some more calls and we'll go home. Perfect. Okay. That'll be about the next two hours. So let's see.

22:14 Drew Wait a minute.

22:16 Adam No, we got a question for you. Laurel?

22:19 Caller Hello?

22:20 Adam What's up?

22:21 Caller I was wondering. I have a question for the director.

22:25 Adam Here they are.

22:26 Caller Hi. First of all, I love you guys. You're my favorite band.

22:30 Caller You're awesome.

22:30 Caller I saw your show on Tuesday.

22:32 Caller Thank you.

22:33 Caller And it's the most awesome thing I've ever seen.

22:35 Caller Cheers.

22:37 Caller My question is, what's coming up next?

22:40 Caller I mean, are you planning on recording another album or touring, wedding festival, SNL, anything?

22:49 Caller Well, we're coming back in June to tour here and in September again. So we're writing for the new album and so on and so forth. And I'd just like to say that we're a little bit shocked about this program. We weren't really informed as to kind of what it was and how serious it was and the sort of things. We thought it was based around the darkness and it's not. And these guys are doing a great job with their advice and stuff. So this will be the last you'll hear of us on this show tonight, I'm afraid. Yeah, but thanks for calling in. Thanks for being a great fan. We'll be in America for another two tours towards the end of the year. And thanks for your support. And I'm sorry to everyone who listened. It's got questions for us, but this isn't us.

23:27 Adam All right. Well, listen, I respect that.

23:30 Caller Yeah, I appreciate you guys what you're doing, but it's not what I expected.

23:33 Caller Yeah, we're not really qualified to kind of talk about this question.

23:36 Adam No, I understand. We got a lot of tough questions tonight. I mean, normally we get a few of these, but they're not quite as...

23:46 Caller This is not what we're on this for. I think you guys carry on doing what you're doing.

23:50 Drew But be careful, though, because the celebrities play a very important role in here because that's who this age group listens to. And if you are able to reinforce any of the things that are said, it has a huge effect.

24:02 Caller I would not feel qualified to talk to any of these people. I appreciate their problems, and I have problems, but this is not the time and the place. I'm not qualified to talk to you people. I'm really sorry.

24:13 Adam Okay.

24:15 Fair enough.

24:17 Adam We'll still play a Darkness song when we come back. But I guess...

24:21 Caller It's absolutely fine.

24:21 Drew Oh, we like to. I told you before.

24:23 Adam I like to do it anyway.

24:24 Drew All right.

24:25 Adam We'll say bye to the band. God bless you guys. Come back anytime. And we'll be back after this.

24:33 Thank you for calling Loveline.

24:35 Caller Your call will be answered in the order it seems interesting.

24:41 Drew Thanks to Jenny McCarthy and her steamy pictorial, January will no longer officially be known as the coldest month of the year.

24:53 Adam It's the best of Loveline. Well, out with the darkness.

24:58 Drew And in with a real friend.

24:59 Adam That's right. Young Dave Navarro. Hey, everybody.

25:04 Drew It's Loveline.

25:04 Adam I'm Adam.

25:05 Drew That's Dr. Drew.

25:06 And I'm Dave Navarro, your guest personality in the studio here today.

25:10 Adam I would have got to that, Dave.

25:12 I know. But it just, you know, rarely does a guest ever get a word in Edgewise. So I wanted to throw that in there and just acknowledge that I'm here.

25:19 Adam Chris, shut his mic.

25:21 Drew We'll kick back.

25:22 Adam Proudly.

25:23 I'm joking.

25:24 Adam Now, Dave Navarro here and Dr. Drew, of course, Dave's got himself a book out called Don't Try This at Home. It is sort of half between a coffee table book and a novel. It is it has got here. Here's the thing. Here's my assessment. If you like reading, it's good. And if you like looking at pictures, it's good.

25:46 Caller And the chapters are short, so you can actually keep it in the bathroom and just get through it over the course of the year.

25:52 Adam Yeah.

25:53 Caller Yeah. Five minutes of time.

25:55 Adam Who's in this book?

25:56 Drew Did you work with her?

25:57 Caller Yeah, Judith Regan. Yeah, she's awesome. I had a huge crush on her. Really? Huge, because there's something about that women in the business suit and power, smart, sexy, just kind of want to be run by them.

26:09 Adam Full of themselves.

26:10 Caller Love it. The more, the more, the better.

26:12 Drew I did a book with her. I like her a lot.

26:14 Adam Spun gold.

26:14 Drew He hates her.

26:15 Caller Oh, well, tell us, tell us.

26:16 Adam No, I only hate, here's why I hate her. And this is Drew.

26:20 Caller She hated me for a long time.

26:21 Adam Super low self-esteem coming through.

26:23 Drew No, I've had great experience with her top to bottom, except that one day.

26:27 Adam We had, there was going to be a Loveline book, or maybe we did do a Loveline book. But anyway, someone wanted to do a book, some sort of Loveline book. And Judith Regan was one of the first people we met with. And it was supposed to be a big thrill for us to meet Judith Regan.

26:44 Caller Oh, yeah. If it's not a thrill for you, you got problems out the gate.

26:48 Adam She was coming off of doing Stern's book, I think. And it was considered a coup that we could meet the great Judith Regan in the lobby of her hotel. So we set up a meeting for, I don't know, noon. And she rolled down about a half hour late with no apologies, no explanations in the lobby of her own hotel, by the way. Sexy for everyone else. Then basically proceeded to explain to Drew and our idiot manager and his wife why nobody wanted the Loveline book because no one had heard of Loveline and no one. And everyone just nodded like bobblehead dolls. And by the way, Drew, I want an apology that's written on the AIDS quilt from you. It's got to be that big. For all the times we've had the meetings where I've been the only one to raise my hand and say, wait a minute. No, you're wrong. That's not what's going on.

27:40 Caller Well, why would you take a meeting with someone that you're not interested in working with? I just wouldn't take the meeting.

27:45 Adam I didn't have any idea I wasn't interested in working with her until I find out when I conceded.

27:50 Caller No, clearly she wasn't interested in you guys.

27:51 Adam Oh, why would she do it? Well, that's a good point.

27:54 Caller Maybe just to flex that power.

27:56 Adam I wanted to rub our nose in something and we could all kiss her ring or bow at her altar. And I was the only one who said, at a certain point, I said, look, you don't know who we are. That's fine. That doesn't mean we don't have fans who do know who we are and want to write, want to hear what we have to say.

28:13 Drew I think you, now that I know her very, very well, I think you've sort of missed how she works.

28:18 Adam She wanted to write a book on chivalry. Drew was nodding his head like a bobblehead doll. And I was the only one who said, no, we're, look, if we write a book, it's got to be the Loveline book. It's not Adam and Drew talk about chivalry.

28:32 Caller And, but that would be a good book too.

28:34 Adam And we never end up, thank you, working with her.

28:36 Caller Did that one ever come out?

28:37 Adam No, but it should.

28:37 Caller The chivalry book or the Loveline book?

28:38 Adam True, write that down. The Loveline book came out, the chivalry book.

28:42 Caller Still work in progress?

28:43 Adam Yeah, yeah. I didn't like her much, that's all.

28:46 Drew Would you rather work with her or the A-holes we did work with?

28:49 Adam Nobody, really. Look, I'm sure she's good at what she does. She was a bitch, that's all I'm saying. And she was full of herself and I didn't need it, that's all. And by the way, she's got a crappy talk show on deep cable and she can kiss my ass.

29:02 Caller I find all that very attractive.

29:04 Adam Yeah, oh me?

29:05 Caller No, there's the bitch, the deep cable show, all of that stuff.

29:08 Adam What about me calling her bitch? Not just saying, Drew, you don't have to be nice to mean people.

29:13 Drew I really like her.

29:14 Adam You really like her?

29:15 Drew Yeah.

29:16 Adam Okay. She's awesome. She's great to work with, yeah. Drew, you never get tired of being nice to bad people. Crappy people. Leave him alone. Just call him bad. When someone comes up to the airport at us and starts yelling at you, where do you get, don't, just tell them to F off.

29:31 Drew I was thinking, the stranger was thinking about that today. I was thinking about some of the experiences we've had with that.

29:35 Adam Judith Regan was a bitch to us and she can kiss my ass. Who cares?

29:39 Drew She's been great to me since.

29:40 Adam Yeah, great. Sarah?

29:42 Hello?

29:42 Caller Hi, Sarah.

29:43 Adam You're 21. What's up?

29:45 Caller Okay. I have a question. Okay. I'm 21 and I've never had an orgasm before and I've heard girls talk about why we cause them a lot. And I guess there's this pleasure point and I've used my vibrator and I felt this with the pleasure point where it's like you pee, but it's not pee.

30:03 Is it pee?

30:04 Caller No, hold on a second. Is it ejaculate?

30:06 Drew It's either that or ejaculation. It can be pee sometimes.

30:09 Caller If it's ejaculation, you're a very lucky young lady. Not everybody knows that.

30:13 Caller No. Well, the Cosmos that I read say that you pee, but it's not pee.

30:19 Adam Hold on, hold on, hold on.

30:20 Caller I gotta get a copy of those.

30:21 Adam You're 21?

30:22 Caller Yes.

30:23 Adam All right, first off, you should be putting down the Cosmo and going number two on it, not number one.

30:29 Drew Yes, forget about the Cosmo.

30:29 Adam Drew can't stay in the Cosmo.

30:31 Drew Oh my God.

30:31 Adam And number two, back to number one, you sound like you're nine.

30:35 Drew 14 or 12.

30:36 Adam Yeah, what's up? Are you Asian or were you abused?

30:39 Caller No, no, no, no, no. Sorry to God. No joke, no joke. Okay, no, I've been having sex since I was 15 and I cannot have an orgasm like at all.

30:47 Caller Okay, have you tried watching that Johnny Depp pirate movie?

30:51 Drew A lot of women do not.

30:52 Caller Because that works for a lot of women.

30:54 Caller I don't know. I'm not that kind of girl. I don't like orgasm.

30:57 Drew Sarah, here's the data. Here's the data. Most women cannot have an orgasm until they're in their 20s.

31:05 Caller I understand that, but I have so much sex and it's just like...

31:08 Drew Most women...

31:09 Caller It's almost like I'm getting pregnant.

31:10 Adam Hold on. Jesus Christ. Just shut your pie hole for 10 seconds. What's wrong with everybody? Just shut up. Would you shut up?

31:18 Caller The poor thing's probably been on hold for 45 minutes. You've got the doctor talking.

31:21 Adam You've been on hold for 11 minutes. Sarah.

31:24 Caller Yes.

31:25 Adam Shut up.

31:26 Drew What have you heard me say so far?

31:29 Caller That most people don't have sex until they, or excuse me, orgasm until they're 20 to watch Johnny Depp. No, no, no.

31:36 Caller I think you heard the right part.

31:38 Drew Take the cotton out of your ears and put it in your mouth. So here's the deal. That you should never, you should not expect to have an orgasm with the intercourse. That's not going to happen. Okay. Okay. You can possibly with oral sex, but that's going to take some time. And you're sort of hitting an age where that normally kind of comes online. It should be getting easier for you about now.

31:57 Caller But look out when it happens, because it is going to open a world for you.

32:01 Adam Yeah.

32:01 Drew But it's not going to be with intercourse.

32:03 Adam By the way, I want to give you points for shutting up.

32:07 Drew And everything you read in Cosmo is sort of BS.

32:09 Caller It got real quiet, didn't it?

32:10 Adam Yeah.

32:10 Caller You heard crickets coming off the other end of the phone.

32:12 Adam Hey, Sarah.

32:14 Caller Yes.

32:15 Adam You have a boyfriend?

32:16 Caller Yes.

32:17 Adam And they never been abused?

32:19 Caller Oh, no. Yeah. I was molested when I was smaller, but I mean.

32:23 Adam All right.

32:23 Drew Well, then the things get worse. By the way, Adam brought that up a long time ago and asked about your abuse. And you're the voice.

32:29 Adam Yeah.

32:29 Drew You sound like a five year old.

32:30 Adam You got the voice.

32:32 Caller I look really young, too. I.

32:33 Caller What does that say about about society? You know, like you ask, have you been abused? And she's like, oh, yeah.

32:39 Adam Yeah.

32:39 Caller Well, because I'm I'm really just that common. No, no, no.

32:44 Adam Listen. Oh, hold on. Hold on. Her answer was when I heard it in her voice that she had the little girl voice. Thus, I knew she was sexually abused. Her answer was she. Yeah, yeah. I look really young.

32:56 Caller I bet it's her fault.

32:58 Drew No, it's just she's not listening.

32:59 Adam She doesn't listen. And if she she just deflects everything. Sarah, if you were if you're sexually abused, you have to get some therapy.

33:08 Caller Oh, no, no, no. I'm sorry. I think I answered your wrong question. No, it's not because I look pretty young. No, definitely not. I was abused when I was like three. And I'm over it now because I look young men.

33:18 Drew You don't get over that, Sarah.

33:19 Adam I know.

33:20 Drew Sarah, you don't get over that.

33:21 Adam And look, by the... All right. Hold on a second. I just said if you're sexually abused, you got to get some therapy. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You misunderstood. I was sexually abused when I was three. Oh, really? I thought we're going to build a time machine and go into the future and have you sexually abused in your 80s. You're saying it happened before when you were young. Oh, in that case. Well, if it didn't happen this week, you're fine. There's no proms.

33:42 Drew You know, I was thinking about women. I was thinking about women in the Cosmo magazine. Let me switch gears for one second.

33:46 Adam Hold on. Does this just dispatch with Sarah? Sarah.

33:49 Caller Yes.

33:50 Adam You got to stop your rap.

33:52 Drew You were maybe bipolar.

33:55 Adam You need to get some therapy. Can you get some therapy?

33:59 Caller Well, I've been through all that. I'm good now.

34:02 Adam I know you're not good now. You're not good. If you're good, how could I tell?

34:08 Caller No, I really am good now.

34:09 Adam How did I know you were sexually abused if you're fine?

34:12 Caller Most of the people who call are.

34:16 Adam It's only 65% of the people that call the show.

34:19 Caller You know what, Sarah? I think your voice sounds sexy as hell.

34:22 Drew Well, of course it does. Darryl Monroe is a sexually abused.

34:24 Caller You know what? Honestly, too, I love your guys' show just like everyone else, and I always laugh at all the people that you put on hold, and I swear I never thought I'd be one of those people.

34:34 Adam All right. You got a sense of humor, but please.

34:36 Drew And you're smart.

34:37 Adam You're smart. So get some therapy, would you?

34:39 Drew Let's get back to it a little bit. And you're preoccupying.

34:42 Caller Just wondering, not trying to argue, really not. Why do you think I need therapy? And I know you're the expert, and not me. Just wondering.

34:48 Caller I think I could. Clearly, I can get this one is because if you have dealt with something like that in your life that is so traumatic, that at some point you need to address it and deal with it and move through it.

34:59 Caller You're such a head. I went through so much therapy, and it was good for me and I'm happy. And I go through it all the time. I hear a lot of other girls talk about rape, or I just get them through that. So I think therapy is always good for everyone, even if you've never been through anything. And I mean, I could go to therapy tomorrow and be proud of myself, but...

35:17 Caller Well, let me ask these guys something. Will that change the sound of her voice? Is there enough therapy that all of a sudden she was on like a grown woman?

35:24 Drew Eventually, it does tend to happen.

35:25 Caller Well, there you go.

35:27 Adam It doesn't change the tone that much, but the cadence, which is angry people have the same voice, but it doesn't sound as angry. But the tone sounds the same and the same with people that were victimized and that kind of stuff. And yes.

35:41 Caller Okay, well, there you go.

35:42 Adam She's got help, but when you get molested at three, you need more help.

35:48 Drew She's doing a lot better, I understand, but she's sort of screwed up about her sexuality. She's trying to get glean information from Cosmo about things that are mysterious to her, not involved in her relationship, not asking for help from her boyfriend. And here's the thing about women, I was thinking about this in Cosmo and pornos and women. Women are more aroused by seeing other women have an experience than just about anything else. So they read Cosmo because it's women in spas, women in talking, women in... And when they watch pornos, they're watching, if the woman's having a good time, then it's a rousing experience for her.

36:19 Adam Right.

36:20 Caller Well, then also the good news is that this, as you said earlier, since most women don't start having orgasms till they're in their twenties, these situations could be unrelated.

36:29 Drew Which?

36:29 Caller The lack of orgasms could have nothing to do with the fact that she was abused.

36:33 Drew Yes, that's right.

36:33 Adam Oh, yeah.

36:34 Drew So it's not like my concern is the way she was sort of going about it. She wasn't like communicating with her boyfriend about it. She was sort of reading Cosmo and is all very mysterious and disconnected from her experience. That's all abuse stuff. And we'll be right back with Dave Navarro after this.

36:49 Thank you for calling Loveline.

36:51 Caller Your call will be answered in the order it seems interesting. Call Loveline.

36:55 Caller Call Loveline.

36:58 Adam If the January Playboy is any indication...

37:12 Drew And we are back with the best of Loveline. We are going to continue with our dear, dear friend, Dave Navarro. And Adam's not going to talk because he's decided, oh.

37:21 Adam No, no, no, I'll talk.

37:22 Drew You can grunt and say, no, no, no, I'm not pouting.

37:24 Adam Just go ahead and do something. That's fine.

37:25 Drew Fair enough. Well, Dave Navarro is a dear friend, and he is certainly...

37:29 Adam All right, that's enough.

37:30 Drew Okay. Here we go.

37:32 Adam We...

37:33 Drew Star.

37:33 Adam We got plenty of time. Oh, Star's back.

37:35 Drew Yes.

37:36 Adam Star?

37:36 Yes.

37:37 Caller Hey, Star.

37:38 Adam You're 19. What's up?

37:40 Caller Well, I wanted to know if I'm a sex addict.

37:46 Drew I just said... Oh, that air smoke detector.

37:49 Caller Well, I lost my virginity when I was 13, and what you just said about daddies is right.

37:53 Drew Yes, we know that. I just spent a big conference on extra sexual addictions. I spent the last week in Washington, DC.

37:58 Caller No, but I...

37:59 Drew Studying the stars in the world.

38:03 Adam Hey, star.

38:04 Drew Yeah.

38:05 Adam Is there a smoke detector in the house?

38:08 Caller No.

38:09 Caller Why a smoke detector?

38:12 Adam Are you in an apartment?

38:13 Yeah, why?

38:14 Adam We should have a smoke detector.

38:16 Caller I took it out.

38:18 Adam Oh, you did? Because the battery ran low?

38:20 Caller No.

38:22 Caller Because it kept...

38:24 Drew Oh, we definitely hear it.

38:25 Adam Move toward...

38:26 Caller What is that?

38:27 Adam Move toward the thing that made the noise, Star. I've now come down to descriptions of shapes. Like, I don't say pizza at our house. I say the round thing that you put in your yummy hole. So, no longer... I no longer use specific titles anymore. That can be confusing and it brings on denial.

38:50 Caller Yes, yes.

38:50 Adam Star.

38:51 Caller Hello.

38:52 Adam Move toward the vented object on the ceiling.

38:56 Caller Why?

38:57 Adam Please do it.

38:59 Caller Okay.

39:02 Caller You guys are messing with me. I'm not...

39:05 Adam Are you moving toward that object?

39:06 Caller No.

39:07 Adam Well, then I'm hanging up on you.

39:09 Caller Okay, I'm moving.

39:11 Caller Okay.

39:13 Drew See, Adam, how you treat these victims.

39:14 Caller Okay.

39:15 Caller I'm under it.

39:16 Drew The smoke detector?

39:17 Caller The smoke detector, yes.

39:18 Caller Okay.

39:19 Caller The one that she took out.

39:20 Caller Right.

39:20 Caller She's under it now.

39:22 Caller No, the cords that connect to the wall.

39:25 Caller Okay.

39:26 Adam Now, let's just wait.

39:28 Caller Yeah.

39:28 Caller Well, there's little cords that connect to the whole base of the thing.

39:32 Caller So, I'm under that.

39:33 Caller Why?

39:33 Drew Apart buildings, they have a hole.

39:34 Caller Why are we doing this? I want to ask them a question.

39:37 Drew We'll get to it. Just hang on a second.

39:38 Caller Oh, I think.

39:39 Adam I just want to hear a chirp.

39:41 Caller Huh?

39:41 Drew I've heard it off in the distance.

39:42 Caller Oh, you want to hear the actual thing?

39:44 Caller I can get that.

39:45 Caller I want it stuffed onto the couch.

39:49 Caller Am I on the radio right now?

39:51 Adam Was it chirping under the couch?

39:53 Caller No, here. It's right here.

39:57 Adam Does it? Hold on a second.

39:59 Drew Okay.

40:00 Caller Anyways.

40:01 Drew I swear I heard it.

40:02 Adam I heard it twice.

40:03 Drew But it sounded like it was in the neighbor's yard. So it could well have been... Oh, it just went again.

40:09 Adam Star.

40:10 Caller Hello?

40:11 Adam This is a bit of an obsession for us. It's really the only thing we have.

40:15 Caller You really shouldn't do that to me. I don't know what you're doing.

40:18 Caller Well, it definitely is a sure fire sign that you're a sex addict.

40:22 Adam Star, I don't know. Are you high right now?

40:24 Caller A little.

40:25 Adam A little.

40:26 Drew All right.

40:27 Adam Here's what I need you to do. Just cool your stone jets for one second and understand that we're hearing a chirp from a smoke detector.

40:37 Drew With a dead battery or a dying battery.

40:40 Adam Okay.

40:41 Caller Yeah.

40:42 Adam Okay. Is that smoke detector somewhere in the apartment?

40:47 Caller Yeah.

40:47 Caller It's right next to me.

40:49 Adam Okay. And does it chirp periodically?

40:52 Caller Yes. Okay.

40:54 Caller Because the battery is low, you dick. I told you like 50 times. Okay. I pulled it out because it kept...

41:03 Caller All right.

41:03 Adam Now, put the smoke detector near the phone. We want to hear it chirp.

41:07 Caller No.

41:09 Drew Yes.

41:10 Caller I don't know where it's coming from that chirp though, because it's weird. It's in like my general area, and it just chirps once in a while.

41:21 Drew But you can't find it.

41:22 Caller No. Stop making fun of me.

41:31 Adam You don't see it on your ceiling somewhere?

41:34 Caller I have a serious question.

41:36 Adam Well, we have a more serious problem.

41:38 Drew I swear to God, I'm going to get to it, but we are intrigued. I'm so confused.

41:43 Caller She said she put it underneath the couch, and then she pulled it out.

41:45 Adam I thought you said you put it underneath the couch.

41:48 Caller Listen, I've been smoking weed.

41:51 Drew We got that.

41:52 Adam Listen, I've smoked weed 10,000 times. I understand English. You know what I mean? I mean, I get high as a kite, and I can drive through a jack-in-the-box and order half the goddamn menu and drive home and then watch a whole episode of the A-Team and understand every word of it. Stop speaking English when I get high. Yes, you're high. Where's your smoke detector?

42:14 Really? That's it?

42:16 Adam You just have a drag off a joint, and that's it. You no longer comprehend English. You can't have conversations. Oh, my God.

42:25 Caller All right. Fine.

42:26 Adam Star.

42:27 Caller Yeah, I'm OK.

42:28 Adam You're high. So what?

42:30 Drew Where is the smoke detector? Adam, Adam, we realize, you understand, you're a heavyweight.

42:34 Adam I am a heavyweight.

42:35 Drew Because you're a heavyweight, you can maintain.

42:37 Caller I went through an ace in two days.

42:40 Drew Star's a light. What?

42:41 Caller I went through an ace in two days. Yeah.

42:44 Adam OK.

42:44 Drew Oh, I heard it again.

42:45 Adam OK.

42:45 Drew It's in the kitchen. Go in the kitchen.

42:47 Adam Head toward the kitchen, Star.

42:48 Caller I got to tell you guys, I'm thrilled that I came out here tonight.

42:50 Drew It's in the kitchen. This is awesome. You should be. It's in the kitchen. It's in the kitchen.

42:55 Caller OK.

42:55 Caller You're checking my house for a boy.

42:57 Adam Oh, she used the F word.

43:00 Caller It's not good. I get on.

43:01 Drew It's in the kitchen.

43:02 Caller All right.

43:03 Drew I got to deal with her, though. Come on, let me get at her.

43:06 Adam She just dropped the F-bomb.

43:07 Drew It's all right. We've been screwing with her. Come on. Let me help her.

43:10 Adam I just want her to chirp.

43:12 She's too high to figure out where it is.

43:14 Caller What is the thing with this?

43:15 Caller She said F twice.

43:16 Adam She said the F word.

43:17 Drew I got to talk to her. She's too high.

43:19 Adam Dave, what do you want to know?

43:20 Caller What is the thing with this? Does this happen often? Oh, often.

43:23 Adam All the time.

43:24 Caller And you guys, every time you waste 15 minutes of airtime?

43:26 Adam Yeah.

43:27 Caller And there's people out there with problems.

43:28 Drew We make our evening worth living.

43:30 Adam Dave just lost a plug for the book. About to plug the plug.

43:35 Caller These are people calling in with legitimate issues and we're looking for the chirp.

43:39 Adam You're saying fire safety is not an issue, Dave?

43:41 Caller Perhaps, but you know.

43:42 Adam Perhaps. All right.

43:45 Drew Let me just finish with it. Star?

43:48 Adam Sorry.

43:49 Drew Okay, listen. You go ahead and ask a question.

43:54 Adam Really?

43:54 Drew Come on.

43:54 Adam Here we go.

43:55 Drew Star, ask the question. Go ahead. Are you in the kitchen?

44:00 Caller I was, yes, when I cussed at you.

44:03 Drew Was it chirping in there?

44:04 Adam No, Drew.

44:05 Caller All right.

44:05 Drew Ask the question.

44:06 Adam Drew, you can't stop.

44:09 Caller Let me ask my question.

44:11 Drew Go now. Ask, ask.

44:12 Caller Thank you.

44:13 Caller Yes, please.

44:15 Drew Anderson, I swear to God. Go.

44:19 Caller Okay.

44:20 Caller No, the secret is I lost my virginity when I was 13. And I started having sex regularly when I was 14. I have lots and lots and lots of sexual partners. I'd say about 60 or 70. And I used to do private parties and all kinds of stuff.

44:41 Adam Stinking whore.

44:44 Drew All right. So you're, you're, okay.

44:46 Caller No.

44:46 Drew You're an addict and you're sexually addicted.

44:48 Caller Anabipolar.

44:50 Drew All right. Go ahead.

44:53 Caller And I just want, I have a fiancé now that I've been faithful to for a while, ever since I got out. And-

44:59 Drew Got out? Got out of what?

45:02 Caller I was in jail.

45:05 Caller For what?

45:07 Caller Drugs.

45:09 Drew Well, you're not in recovery, though. You might want to work on that.

45:11 Caller I've been off my drug of choice for a long time, so.

45:15 Drew Was heroin drug of choice?

45:16 Caller No, I was a speed addict.

45:18 Drew Well, marijuana, most speed addicts are actually marijuana addicts. So you're, you're, you're smoking an eight ball every two days. You're well into your- Eight. I beg your pardon.

45:27 Caller A different, different lingo.

45:29 Drew Same.

45:29 Caller Yeah.

45:30 Adam All right, Star, what's your question?

45:32 Caller I want to know how I can help myself. Cause I know I have a sexual problem. I must cause the guy that I'm with, like I need sex with him six, seven times a day.

45:39 Caller You gotta get clean first.

45:40 Drew Yeah. It's all, it's all.

45:41 Caller You gotta get clean first. And then it's, it's all gonna be part of that.

45:44 Drew Exactly. You probably were sexually abused when you were a kid, whether you remember it or not. You're definitely an addict. You're bipolar. It all goes to-

45:51 Caller I can't remember my childhood really, either when I was eight.

45:53 Drew Because, Star, horrible things happen.

45:55 Adam You gotta get cleaned up.

45:56 Drew You gotta go to 12 step. You're gonna probably have to have spent some time somewhere in a sober living. You gotta go to 12 step. You're gonna have to get a sponsor. You have to really diligently work the program. You gotta really want to do this. But all those behaviors are all attempts at managing unpleasant, overwhelming feeling states. And the only way you get through that into a more meaningful and nourishing life is through recovery. Yes?

46:15 Caller Absolutely.

46:17 Adam All right. Let's take a break. And by the way, this is why we don't answer anyone's question because you being horny is really neither here nor there. You're being in the joint. You're strung out on drugs. You're a mess. Yeah. That's what you need to focus on. All these things will straighten out when you straighten out. You lose the addiction, start getting into therapy, clean your life up, and then call us up and if you're still in info, by the way, I guarantee you won't be, but call us then.

46:43 Drew You still have issues. And always sex and relationships will be the way, the thing that could take you down in your recovery, so to speak.

46:50 Adam How can you not find the smoke detector that's chirping in your house every 30 seconds?

46:54 Drew How can you say F five times while you're on national radio? All right.

46:57 Adam We'll take a quick break. Dave Navarro is here. He was here. And we'll be right back after this. Yeah, it's the best of Loveline. We'll say bye to Dave Navarro and hello to Alicia Cutbert, who's in The Girl Next Door, And as you recall, she told me I was way too old for her.

47:45 Drew You'll never forget that.

47:46 Adam No, I shan't not.

47:50 Drew Hey everybody, it's Loveline.

47:52 Adam I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LLVE-191. Elisha Cuthbert is here tonight. She is The Girl Next Door. She's not from The Girl Next Door. She is The Girl Next Door, Drew. Do you understand that?

48:05 Drew She is that. Yeah.

48:08 Adam The movie's not called The Little Dude Who Lives Next to That Chick. It's called The Girl Next Door.

48:15 Drew It's about her.

48:16 Adam It's about Elisha. She's the star of the movie.

48:20 Drew It's like the godfather.

48:21 One of.

48:23 Adam Really looks great in that movie, by the way.

48:26 Thanks.

48:26 Adam Lots of tight outfits. Revealing, but not the. No, no, no.

48:30 It was great too, because I.

48:31 Adam A bra and panty.

48:32 I got to. With 24, I had the same outfit the whole year, which is like ten months.

48:37 Adam Sure.

48:38 And on this movie, it was 18 costume changes. So I was like, woo hoo.

48:41 Adam Yeah. And good looking stuff too.

48:43 Good looking stuff. Thank you.

48:45 Adam Yeah. No, you look good. I, you know, I'm sure you're.

48:48 Well, the Girl Next Door's got to be hot, right?

48:50 Adam Yeah. Yeah. And it's, it's weird because, well, I think every teenage boy or every, every man who passed through his teen years and everyone's who's still amongst them, like our engineer Chris over here, who's technically 27, but still living at home. So I count him as a teenager, a teenager, still hiding porn from his mom. If you're hiding porn from your mom, your teenager, you'd be in your fifties and hiding porn from your 85 year old mother. You would be a teenager.

49:20 Drew That defines adolescence anyway.

49:21 Adam That's why they call Dick Clark the world's oldest teenager.

49:24 Drew He's living at home.

49:25 Adam He's hiding porn from his mom.

49:28 Drew That van that he claims is his editing van.

49:32 Adam That's what he uses to transport porn.

49:34 Drew And watch it.

49:35 Adam That's right.

49:36 Drew Out in the mom's driveway.

49:37 Adam All right. So here, come on. He's never coming on this show. Here's what we do. We don't talk about it on the air, but we decide quietly amongst ourselves who's coming on this show and who's not coming on. And once we decide they're not coming on the show, that's a fair game. Game on.

49:50 Caller Game on. That's a good plan, though. Yeah.

49:52 Adam Yeah. We make fun of everybody. But if we think maybe they're coming on the show, we do some ass kissing. Serious ass kissing.

50:00 Caller Julia Roberts is the best.

50:01 Adam She... No, no, she won't come on this show, even though we would want her to come on this show. So we could...

50:08 Caller So she's fair game, then?

50:09 Adam She's fair game.

50:09 Caller OK.

50:10 Adam Yeah. Getting a little long in the tooth. All right. See, that was a little that was a little dig.

50:14 Drew Very satisfying.

50:15 Adam Very satisfying. All right. Now, what was I talking about? I have no idea. OK. Well, then we got to move forward with the show. What do you say?

50:23 Drew Oh, Chris. Chris and stealing porn from... Hiding porn from his mom. He said every teenage male has something about the girl next door.

50:29 Adam Oh, yeah. It's just... I mean, I was watching the movie and when Elisha, the beautiful woman, moves in next door to the horny young teenage boy thing and he spots her through his bedroom window, it just brings you back. Your heart starts pumping and when they start talking and it's like... it was so identifiable.

50:50 Drew That's a desperation that every teenage male feels.

50:53 Adam Yeah, but remember when you were like 17 and just anybody...

50:58 Drew Praying to God for him to drop somebody out of the sky to the neighbor's house? Yeah. Yeah. That's right.

51:02 Adam No, it's just like once in a while when your mom's friends would say, I don't have to say my nephew's in town and niece is in town and some chick was 15 would come walk in and she'd be like, ha ha ha. Remember?

51:13 Caller Yes.

51:13 Caller Your heart starts going?

51:15 Caller Yeah.

51:15 Drew Yeah. It's just some sort of like an animal, you know.

51:19 Adam Yeah.

51:20 Caller Animalistic.

51:21 Drew Yeah. But it's some sort of like frightened slash desperate animal cage. They're kind of a strange...

51:26 Adam Yeah. Fight, flight or Jack actually was the third option that simultaneously they sort of kick in. All right. Is that Toko? Toko?

51:40 Caller Yeah.

51:41 Adam Is that your name? What kind of name is that?

51:44 Caller Japanese.

51:45 Adam All righty then. You Japanese?

51:47 Caller Yeah.

51:48 Adam How's that treating you?

51:50 Caller Good.

51:50 Adam All right. What's up?

51:52 Caller Well, I'm obsessed with gay porn.

51:55 Adam Really?

51:56 Drew Gay male.

51:57 Adam You and Dick Clark?

51:58 Caller Yeah, gay porn.

52:00 Drew Well, gay men, not lesbian.

52:02 Caller No, gay men, yeah.

52:05 Adam Finally, a chick making sense, you know, because, no, here's what I'm saying. Like, guys, we do the porn math. We're like, hey, lesbian porn, fine. That's two vaginas, four boobs, four, three, four boobs, four boobs, four boobs, four boobs, right?

52:20 Caller Yeah.

52:20 Adam And we do that math, whereas women who look at, who enjoy pornography, and there's not too many of them out there, normally don't like the gay porn, but it's two penises and how many not sex?

52:31 Drew They're weirded out by it. They're kind of a little good.

52:33 Adam Yeah.

52:34 Drew Yeah.

52:34 That's all right.

52:35 Drew Toko's more evolved, huh?

52:38 Adam I'm sure she's more effed up, but... So you have gay porn?

52:43 Caller Well, I have it on my computer, yeah.

52:46 Adam And have your parents found out about it?

52:50 Caller No.

52:50 Drew How old were you when you started looking at this?

52:53 Caller Last year.

52:56 Drew What if her parents find out?

52:58 Adam Oh, yeah. You know what they're going to say?

53:01 Drew Toko Ono.

53:02 Caller Ono Toko.

53:03 Adam Ono Toko. Come on, baby dog. All right. No, your parents, if they're Japanese, they'll kill themselves.

53:10 Caller Yeah. Probably.

53:12 Adam Yeah.

53:13 Caller Yeah.

53:13 Adam That's how it works. They're proud. They're proud culture. Uh, anything happen to you? Were you ever abused or traumatized in any way? No.

53:22 Caller No.

53:23 Adam Just into, just like it?

53:24 Caller Yep.

53:25 Caller Well, there you go.

53:26 Adam Do you like gay men? I mean, like hanging around gay men?

53:29 Caller Yeah. I think it's cool. I'd like to see some make out or, you know, like screw each other. I think that'd be cool.

53:34 Drew Oh, Toko. Thumbs up.

53:37 Adam Yeah. Something is up because gay, okay, hold on. We got to talk about this for one second. Gay depictions of gay acts, gay pornography, graphic gay pornography is sort of gut wrenching to straight men. Not because we're bigoted or anything. It's just you take a straight guy, you show them two guys going at it, one behind the other, and they have to avert their gaze just like, for me, it's like seeing dentistry up close or something. I just have to kind of, you have to put your hand up. It's not because I hate dentists. It's just kind of like, oh, wow, can't watch. And I think, Elisha will tell us though, gay pornography for women is kind of gross too. I mean, for normal women, guys going at it.

54:23 Caller Yeah.

54:24 Adam All greased up, you know, leather choker.

54:27 Caller I just can't relate to that. I don't.

54:30 Adam Confusing.

54:30 Drew Confusing. I just say, huh?

54:32 Caller Yeah.

54:33 Drew Okay. All right. So that's an average response.

54:35 Adam Yeah.

54:36 Drew And Toko suddenly is sort of intrigued, aroused, and sort of, and there's an aggression how she approaches it too. You know, sort of inappropriateness, how she presented it.

54:46 Adam Toko? Yeah.

54:48 Drew I would bet there's some other sort of-

54:50 Adam What's missing?

54:51 Drew No, no, some other fetishes here.

54:53 Adam What else are you into?

54:55 Caller Uh, anime.

54:56 Drew There you go. Keep going.

54:58 Adam What is with the anime? Ooh, Little Boys. Really? Are you, are you one of these people just sort of considers yourself deviant?

55:10 Caller No.

55:11 Drew You know, did something happen to you with one of your peers growing up?

55:15 Caller No. No.

55:18 Adam All right. Your parents together?

55:20 Caller Uh, they've been divorced three times.

55:24 Adam But, not the same two?

55:25 Drew To themselves?

55:26 Caller What?

55:26 Drew From the, they've been divorced from one another three times or from three different people?

55:30 Caller Three different people.

55:32 Drew Okay. And so you're pretty tumultuous upbringing, it sounds like.

55:37 Caller Very confusing. All right.

55:38 Adam Do you have a boyfriend?

55:40 Caller No.

55:40 Adam Do you like boys?

55:42 Caller Yeah. Uh, I'm, I'm not lesbian.

55:45 Adam You're not lesbian. You like guys and not just when they're cornholeing?

55:48 Caller Yeah.

55:50 Adam Okay. Because we have to make that distinction. Because Drew.

55:53 Drew Yeah, only that.

55:54 Adam Yeah.

55:54 Drew But there is the, but Toco, you're, the trauma here, right? That's where, that's where we're getting at. That you were in this sort of chaotic family system that was fractured. And I mean, you just seem sort of spun by all that. Yeah. Well, it's, it's, yeah. That's, that's encouraging either.

56:10 Adam What's your plan? You want to go to college?

56:12 Caller Yeah.

56:15 Adam All right. Well, listen, I, here's the deal. You, you sound, you sound troubled. You really do. And, and you sound like somebody, quite frankly, could be in the heroin or something in a few short years, or at least doing something that would, would embarrass the family. How about, how about a little therapy?

56:37 Caller I don't know how well I do in therapy.

56:40 Adam All right. Well, don't go. Let's go to the next call. Listen, I'm not going to try to save the world. Who are we kidding? You want to call the show? You got problems? You want to listen to us? Fine. If you don't, just do whatever you want. I don't care. Joel?

56:52 Caller Hey, how's it going, you guys?

56:54 Adam I got to tell everyone this, just one more time. I get paid whether I help people or not. I really do. As a matter of fact, I don't like helping people because it makes it seem like I should get paid more. You know what I mean?

57:04 Caller You're good at it, though.

57:05 Adam Good at not helping people?

57:06 Caller No, at helping.

57:07 Drew No, he's good at not helping. He incidentally helps.

57:10 He's good at not helping.

57:13 Adam I like to help myself through not helping others.

57:15 Drew Yes, there you go.

57:16 Adam That's my motto.

57:17 Drew Look, Toko, there's more to get at in Toko than we can get to in three minutes on the radio here.

57:21 Adam Well, she's angry. She's angry.

57:23 Drew I mean, she's almost at sort of a near-psychotic. And it's not, please, people, it's not because she enjoys gay porn that we jumped all over that. It was the affect she maintained, the flat, inappropriate, inappropriate laughter, the sort of almost near- I got a feeling of a near-psychotic process.

57:41 Adam She seems like the kind of person-

57:42 Caller She's very enthusiastic.

57:45 Adam She's the kind of person that could do something bad and not think about it too much afterward. It would not haunt her.

57:51 Caller Possibly.

57:52 Adam Yeah. All right. And that includes to herself, by the way.

57:55 Drew Well, she mentioned she's into little boys and I think she means that.

57:58 Adam Really?

57:58 Caller Yeah.

58:00 Adam All right. Well, the world may never know. Let's speak to Joel who's got a question for Elisha. Joel?

58:07 Caller Yeah.

58:08 Adam What's up?

58:09 Caller Hey, how's it going, you guys?

58:10 Adam Good.

58:11 Caller I just want to say one thing real quick. Dr. Drew, my mom read your book, and she's too afraid to call the show and tell you how good it is.

58:18 Drew Oh, that's very kind. Tell her thank you, please.

58:21 Caller Yeah.

58:22 Caller And Elisha?

58:24 Caller Yes.

58:24 Caller Yeah. You're like Adam says, smoking hot.

58:28 Caller Thank you very much.

58:29 Caller Yeah. Totally hot. Maximum issues. Pretty nice. Good job, 124. And I don't know, I might check that new movie out, but.

58:38 Caller Please do.

58:38 Caller Yeah.

58:41 Caller If you do anything this weekend, please check out my movie.

58:44 Caller Oh, yeah. All right. Hey, Adam.

58:46 Caller Thank you very much.

58:47 Adam Yeah, yeah.

58:47 Caller Hey, man. Do you plan on having kids?

58:51 Adam I'm thinking about it. I'm working on it.

58:53 Caller Hey, well, how about, you know, I'll be your lump of clay, man. I want you to mentor me.

58:58 Adam Oh, you mean I don't need a kid? I have a 24-year-old gentleman over here from Sacramento.

59:03 Caller Yeah, yeah.

59:04 Drew Or Gumby, as we call him.

59:06 Caller Okay. You can mold me into that.

59:09 Adam I know. You sound like a clean canvas. Doesn't sound like there's been a whole lot of education going on or anything. I mean, you sound like a sketch that's been shooken a few times.

59:17 Drew He may have passed that window of opportunity though at 24. I know how flexible that clay is now.

59:22 Caller Sometimes, I'm past all the, you know, pee-pee and poo-poo stuff, you know, and now I can just do it at people.

59:27 Drew Well, Adam is just completely uninterested in that.

59:29 Caller Yeah, that's what I'm looking for.

59:31 Caller What are you doing?

59:32 Adam What are you doing, Joel?

59:33 Caller What am I doing?

59:35 Adam Yeah.

59:35 Caller Like, for work?

59:36 Drew Yeah.

59:37 Caller Um, let's see. I'm unemployed.

59:40 Drew He's unemployed there.

59:41 Adam And by the way, we finally found something worse than the answer. Like, you asked me what I'm doing.

59:47 Drew Here's your, what are you doing for work? What are you doing, Val, for work?

59:50 Adam Uh, uh, right now?

59:52 Drew He didn't even say right now.

59:53 Adam I know he didn't say right now. We found one that's worse than right now. Uh, I'm CEO of a Fortune 500 company. Yeah, it never works that way, right?

1:00:03 Drew Right.

1:00:03 Adam Yeah, yeah. Yeah, right now is the number one bad, it's a bad answer for college and, uh. Right now?

1:00:10 Drew Yeah. For anything, for anything, really.

1:00:12 Adam Watch, we'll do the right now for college, Drew. Please try to pull this off. Yeah, I'm going, I'm going to college, I'm going to school.

1:00:18 Drew Where are you going to school right, where are you going to school?

1:00:20 Adam Uh, well, uh, right now. So you hear the right now, that, that's junior college. Now I'm trying, that means I'm transferring. Right. That means transfer. It's never right now.

1:00:29 Drew Let me try another one. I'm going to Brown School of Medicine. So you're going to, you're going to be, yeah, you're going to be a orthopedic surgeon. So what level of training are you at right now?

1:00:37 Adam Uh, right, right, right now, I'm in ninth grade. I have a ninth grade. I just failed biology. I actually failed beginning science. It's one below biology.

1:00:47 Drew So you're fluent in French. Where'd you learn that? Do you speak it all?

1:00:51 Adam Uh, right now, uh, I just, I do pig, I do pig Latin and I can, um, I can do this. I can go home. That's, uh, I can do a little Pepe Le Pew too. That's it.

1:01:02 Drew All right. True.

1:01:03 Adam True. You realize you almost said right now. Each time. You're trying to set the right now.

1:01:06 Drew That's as retarded as you can get, isn't it?

1:01:09 Adam I've seen to be more retarded than you are now.

1:01:10 Drew That was pretty good.

1:01:11 Adam That was close though. All right. Let's, uh, now we're going to play a little something called the Germany or Florida. This is a game that is sweeping the nation and I'm sure is, is if it hasn't made it up north into Canada, it'll be there. It'll be in their days. I'll let them know. Moments. Yeah. You be our Germany or Florida ambassador. Now here's how the game goes. All bizarre, bizarre stories emanate from either Germany or Florida. All the strange, occult, macabre stories, crime stories. Usually it's either Germany or Florida. So they tell us a story and we guess either Germany or Florida. Mike? Yes. You're 22? Here's our theme song.

1:01:49 Caller What's fun in Nazis? Sex, meth, and death fetishes. Both of them have got these. Guaranteed not to bore you. Germany or Florida.

1:01:56 Adam Yes. The song, the game is almost as good as the song. Go ahead, Mike.

1:02:01 Drew Mike, Germany or Florida?

1:02:02 Caller Germany or Florida. Okay. A woman was convicted of disturbing the peace for phoning a bomb threat to an airport to get out of a vacation with her boyfriend. She said, I had the idea that if the trip could be blocked by someone else, for example, a bomb threat, then it would solve all these problems. Germany or Florida. Oh, and Elisha, I Love You to 24, the wonderful show.

1:02:27 Caller Oh, thank you very much.

1:02:30 Drew Let's pull together whatever clues we've got here.

1:02:32 Caller Vacation. Florida is very vacation-y.

1:02:35 Adam Yeah, but people who live in Florida don't want to go to that.

1:02:36 Drew But you would go from Florida for a vacation. Yeah.

1:02:39 Caller I did.

1:02:40 Drew You left Florida? Oh, no. You vacationed in Florida.

1:02:43 Caller I got it all supposed to have.

1:02:45 Adam You vacationed from Florida. In Florida, it's like masturbation.

1:02:49 Drew On the other hand, I wonder if they could be calling in the bomb threat at the destination. No, that doesn't make sense.

1:02:54 Adam I was thinking German.

1:02:55 Drew That's what I was thinking. I was thinking German.

1:02:56 Adam I was thinking German. Now, you don't have to agree. You go with your gut.

1:02:59 Caller Well, I'm going to go with Florida just because I already said it.

1:03:01 Adam And look at you. You're dressed like Florida. You've got the orange shirt and the blonde hair.

1:03:05 Caller It's coral. Coral.

1:03:07 Adam That's gay for orange.

1:03:10 Caller All right.

1:03:11 Adam Mike, we're going Germany and our young gal pal is going Florida.

1:03:16 Caller Elisha, I am so sorry. I wish you'd get the right one. It's German.

1:03:19 Caller No, it's okay.

1:03:19 Adam We've had one more experience.

1:03:21 Drew She'll be good.

1:03:22 Caller I didn't really get the game.

1:03:23 Adam She's a foreigner. She's a foreigner.

1:03:25 Caller I'm from Canada. I don't...

1:03:27 Adam We're going to have to ask you to leave.

1:03:29 Caller I better go now.

1:03:31 Drew No, that's one.

1:03:33 Adam Oh, it isn't?

1:03:33 Drew We got to take Elisha calls.

1:03:34 Adam All right. Amy? Oh, we don't have to.

1:03:36 Caller Yeah, hi.

1:03:37 Adam Who says? Yeah, you're 25. You saw the movie tonight?

1:03:40 Caller I was going to say that was so good.

1:03:42 Adam You liked the movie.

1:03:43 Caller Thanks.

1:03:44 Caller Yeah, it was so good. I mean, not to be rude, but I kind of had a pre-judgment on it that it'd be a little cheesy, a little stupid. But my girlfriend and I loved it. So...

1:03:53 Caller Oh, I'm really glad that you called in because I figured... And a lot of people are feeling the same way as you. I mean, it's an obvious kind of emotion to feel off of the previews and such.

1:04:04 Caller Exactly. Whoever the writer was put everything together so well, or the director.

1:04:10 Caller Yeah, and we also...

1:04:10 Caller How does the girl next door, how does that work, you know?

1:04:13 Caller No, exactly. And then also after actually getting this first script, we kind of... the characters, the actors went over the dialogue too. So we had a lot of rewrites.

1:04:22 Adam Yeah, they tweaked it. They made it their own.

1:04:23 Caller We finessed it.

1:04:24 Caller Well, I don't want to go to congratulation.

1:04:26 Caller Cool.

1:04:27 Caller I'm very excited. I gotta go.

1:04:28 Drew Thanks, Amy.

1:04:29 Caller Thank you so much.

1:04:30 Caller That was nice.

1:04:32 Adam Well, a rare piece of praise being heaped on a guest here.

1:04:35 Caller I liked her.

1:04:36 Adam Quite down over there. Why do we need to talk to someone else who loves Elisha? What about me?

1:04:41 Caller Yeah.

1:04:42 Adam Yeah. Anyone want to know what I did to that? I'm encouraging it. Anyone know what I'm feeling like? It's always guess this and guess that. What about the ace man? He's got feelings. Oh, yeah.

1:04:52 Drew He does.

1:04:53 Caller Yeah.

1:04:54 Caller Don't cry.

1:04:56 Adam I'm okay. Let's talk to Lydia. Lydia?

1:05:00 Caller Yeah.

1:05:00 Adam You're 17.

1:05:01 Caller Yes.

1:05:02 Adam You're straight, but you're roused by lesbian porn.

1:05:05 Caller Very often.

1:05:06 Caller Very often. Wow.

1:05:09 Adam That's a natural thing.

1:05:10 Caller Yeah?

1:05:11 Drew Yeah. Yeah.

1:05:12 Adam It's a natural thing to have a bunker filled with lesbian porn and to masturbate feverishly to lesbian porn.

1:05:19 Drew But to be sort of... To be arousing.

1:05:20 Adam To be arousing.

1:05:21 Drew Than heterosexual.

1:05:22 Adam Yeah. Elisha.

1:05:23 Drew Yeah. And I've talked to women who said the reason for that is that there's more sort of tenderness in the interaction and that's arousing.

1:05:29 Adam Yeah. Especially when they're whizzing on each other. Yeah.

1:05:31 Drew But the males are just...

1:05:32 Caller Oh my God.

1:05:33 Drew It's completely...

1:05:34 Adam Oh, yes.

1:05:35 Drew Do you want to... No, you don't want to keep...

1:05:37 Caller Well, I don't know about that.

1:05:38 Drew Yeah.

1:05:38 Adam But women are much more pliable that way.

1:05:43 Drew Well, listen, the male in the porn stuff is sort of leaving out the whole intimate experience. It's just left out of the equation. When there are two women, that's sort of brought back in again. A little bit of a sort of a tenderness there that women find arousing.

1:05:56 Adam Elisha, you're not lesbian, are you?

1:05:58 Caller No.

1:05:58 Adam No. But you can appreciate an attractive woman.

1:06:02 Caller Yeah. I can tell that, yeah.

1:06:03 Drew Just be careful.

1:06:04 Adam Tell it there first.

1:06:04 Drew Just so you don't have to answer the question.

1:06:06 Adam No. No, I'm not going anywhere. I'm just saying...

1:06:08 Drew I'm sure you're not. No, no. Right now.

1:06:10 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Women are more fluid that way.

1:06:12 Drew That's true.

1:06:13 Adam Worse guys? No. We don't go for that. It's gross stuff. Elisha Cuthbert is here tonight from my new best actress friend. Yeah.

1:06:23 Caller Until the next show.

1:06:24 Caller Until the next show.

1:06:26 Caller Right now.

1:06:27 Adam Until the 11 o'clock out. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back. Well, from the fetching Elisha Cuthbert to the disgusting Steve-O and Chris Panius, everybody.

1:07:00 Drew From the fetching to the retching.

1:07:02 Adam That's right, the drunken wild boys.

1:07:04 Drew They came in here and peed on someone's desk.

1:07:06 Adam Oh yeah.

1:07:07 Drew And Steve-O attacked me with his penis when we met him in New York.

1:07:10 Adam Yeah, Drew's ear will never be the same. Hey everybody, it's Loveline. Drew, mics are hot, so try to stay away from the N-word and the MF, all right? Because Drew goes off like a Merchant Marine.

1:07:26 Best Of Dude, that's all it took to get those radio DJs suspended in Canada for us to get Drew.

1:07:32 Adam Chris Pontius is here tonight along with Steve-O, Wild Boys, name of the show.

1:07:37 Best Of God, that's a really, really, what do you call it, condescending, you know, that clap that clap track. I mean, I forgot.

1:07:46 Adam No, it's an homage. Sunday Nights, 10.30 on MTV. We got a question for the guys from Cody over here, who's 13. Cody?

1:07:57 What's up?

1:07:58 Adam What's up?

1:07:59 Caller Oh, I got a question for Steve-O.

1:08:02 Best Of What's up, brother?

1:08:03 Hey dude, you're my idol, man.

1:08:06 Best Of Hell yeah, not as much as I am mine, dude.

1:08:10 Caller Hey, and my question is, how did that Bullock from Dingleberry taste?

1:08:16 Best Of Well, Chris was the pioneer of the lock licking club. How did it taste, Chris?

1:08:22 Caller It tasted like crap.

1:08:24 Best Of It was crap. What do you mean what it tasted like?

1:08:27 Caller It was crap.

1:08:28 Best Of Of course it tasted like crap.

1:08:29 Adam It tasted like a minty freshness.

1:08:32 Drew Steve, you vomit after most of these things, right?

1:08:34 Best Of Yeah, I've got the weight. It's not that I have a weak stomach, instead of a powerful one. It didn't taste that bad.

1:08:38 Drew But you vomit. I've seen many pictures of you vomiting and gagging, which is...

1:08:41 Best Of Yeah.

1:08:42 Drew Good impulse.

1:08:43 Best Of It's a good impulse. It's really never... Only ever did I vomit on purpose when it was to regurgitate the goldfish before it died. Sure. And I forget what else. Oh, yeah. When I was trying to vomit out the condom full of marijuana that I smuggled internationally in Sweden.

1:08:59 Adam Oh, yeah. Remember that. Got a little hot water.

1:09:02 Best Of But yeah, it's not that I have a weak stomach. I just have a powerful imagination. And someone doesn't even have to be gross. But once I think, you know.

1:09:08 Drew Yeah, but you guys don't have to imagine the gross stuff you get into.

1:09:12 Best Of Really bad news, too. Like, I don't know what was worse for my teeth, like chewing glass or vomiting.

1:09:18 Drew You guys are traveling those weird places. You ever get any weird illnesses or anything?

1:09:22 Best Of You know, we've been we've been. I know I personally, I think you do, too. Go out of my way to drink tap water in every damn country.

1:09:31 Drew Trying to get cholera?

1:09:33 Best Of No, just trying to build my immune system.

1:09:34 Adam Build the immune, Drew. Yeah, exactly. That's how you do it.

1:09:37 Caller We're warriors.

1:09:38 Best Of Yeah, dude.

1:09:39 Drew Most of that worked by killing.

1:09:40 Best Of I drank tap water in India, africa, like.

1:09:43 Drew Most of that worked by killing off the people that couldn't tolerate the water. Any weird STDs or anything?

1:09:49 Best Of Weird STDs? Yeah. We're perplexed. We're completely perplexed. We believe that all these STD talk is complete propaganda because.

1:09:58 Drew Really? Their penis is still attached to their body.

1:10:01 Best Of Yeah.

1:10:01 Adam That's amazing how that works.

1:10:03 Caller It's paid for by the, the propaganda is paid for by the condom companies.

1:10:06 Adam Yeah.

1:10:07 Best Of You see the thing is I like.

1:10:08 Drew You've never gotten an STD?

1:10:09 Caller No. Actually, actually.

1:10:10 Best Of If we have.

1:10:11 Caller Actually, we're both pretty good about the old condoms.

1:10:14 Drew Okay.

1:10:14 Caller No.

1:10:15 Best Of We really are. And I mean, if we do have STDs and they're dormant. And I.

1:10:21 Drew Yeah. Neurocephalus.

1:10:22 Best Of And if.

1:10:24 Drew Neurocephalus, STD.

1:10:26 Best Of You know, I believe a strong, positive mental attitude keeps the STDs dormant, just like laughter cures cancer, you know? It's all the power of the mind.

1:10:34 Adam That's right. You put a smile on your face, you keep the herpes off it.

1:10:37 Drew That's good.

1:10:38 Best Of Yeah. And we're good about rubbers. And I can't hump a girl without giving her my email, at least my email, if not my cell phone number. And so.

1:10:46 Drew So you don't want them calling you up later. And he does.

1:10:49 Best Of No, no. No, I genuinely do.

1:10:51 Drew If you didn't use a condom, you wouldn't want them.

1:10:54 Best Of Well, no, no, no, no.

1:10:55 Drew So you want them to call.

1:10:56 Adam They find out.

1:10:57 Best Of Yeah, exactly. Like, I mean, I'm not going to say there's a lot of them, but there's a few, you know, they get a hold of me. If there's anything turned up shady.

1:11:07 Adam Do you guys scrape anything up when you travel? I mean, woman wise. I mean, first off, most of the places we go, they might not know you where you're going, right?

1:11:16 Best Of Yeah, most of the places.

1:11:17 Adam So it's just you become this sort of bizarre sideshow.

1:11:21 Best Of There was this one night in Phnom Penh.

1:11:23 Caller Oh my God.

1:11:25 Best Of Yeah.

1:11:25 Adam What happened?

1:11:26 Best Of Well, let's just say that.

1:11:29 Caller That.

1:11:30 Best Of Yeah. OK. So this dude comes into the room and it's his room and it's his wife.

1:11:36 Drew Oh, my God.

1:11:37 Best Of To get the hell out. Wow. Wow.

1:11:39 Drew Hotel room.

1:11:40 Best Of No, it was his house.

1:11:42 Drew Oh, wow.

1:11:43 Best Of Is his wife.

1:11:43 Caller And then while she was doing something to his wiener, he was giving Steve-O a bong hit.

1:11:50 Adam Oh, really? I mean, the hookah.

1:11:51 Best Of It was really, really creepy.

1:11:53 Caller They weren't Indian.

1:11:54 Best Of It was a Canadian couple that lived in Bombay.

1:11:55 Adam Wow. Swinging.

1:11:57 Drew He was like the Dutch couple.

1:11:59 Caller I asked him what her haircut was like below the belt. And he said it was pretty tangly, but he would have never noticed because of the fat that had hung over it.

1:12:09 Adam Smart.

1:12:10 Drew Yeah.

1:12:10 Adam She got like the fanny pack that hangs over the mask.

1:12:12 Caller It might as well have been a bald eagle.

1:12:14 Drew It's called a panacea.

1:12:16 Adam A panacea? Yeah. It's nice. You see it on guys at the gym often times.

1:12:20 Drew It's nice. Yeah.

1:12:21 Adam All right. So, yeah, it's bad. It's bad when someone has to hold something out of the way so you can get to their stuff.

1:12:26 Drew This is where Steve-O has sort of formulated his disgust for humanity. This is where the stuff came into sharp focus.

1:12:34 Adam But did you jump in on that? You got in on some of that?

1:12:37 Best Of What are you kidding me? I was balls deep in it when the dude walked in the room.

1:12:49 Adam Well, you know what I say, Drew, it takes all kinds. It really does.

1:12:53 Best Of I mean, when in Bombay?

1:12:56 Adam Do as the Canadians do.

1:12:58 Caller Lizette?

1:12:59 Caller Hi guys.

1:13:00 Adam You're 20. What's happening?

1:13:02 Caller Hey, I have a question for Dr. Drew. I went to the doctor about a month ago and my doctor put me on Prozac. Because I've been having a lot of mood swings and he put me on it to try it out. I noticed that when I'm with my husband, I just don't feel the same anymore.

1:13:20 Drew Right. Prozac will shut you down sexually.

1:13:23 Caller Is there anything that I can like, like I heard that about jail by jail or something like that?

1:13:27 Drew No, no, no, no, no, Lizette, this is a very, very powerful. And there's nothing you can get over the counter that can correct this, period. In fact, there probably is nothing you can do. It makes sex seem like uncomfortable or sort of difficult to understand even. It's hard to orgasm. Sometimes adding wellbutrin will correct this. So you can ask him about adding wellbutrin, but probably the most efficacious thing that's going to be suggested is switching to either serosone, remeron, or just a straight wellbutrin. Those are the three that don't cause the sexual side effects.

1:13:59 Caller Okay, because I mean, I don't know if I take 20 milligrams or 50 milligrams, but I thought maybe it's like, you know, he calmed it down or something.

1:14:05 Caller It wouldn't affect me so much.

1:14:07 Drew Not likely. Prozac will shut you down.

1:14:10 Caller Prozac has played out.

1:14:12 Best Of Yeah, and Xanax is so much cooler.

1:14:14 Adam So is it like for...

1:14:16 Caller Yeah.

1:14:17 Adam Where is my Xanax? I put an order in a long time ago.

1:14:20 Drew I didn't feel it.

1:14:21 Adam Come on, buddy.

1:14:23 Drew Steve, he's got tons of it. He works for the company.

1:14:26 Adam Yeah.

1:14:26 Drew He's got Xana bars floating down the...

1:14:29 Adam I'll bet. Well, you guys, I mean...

1:14:31 Caller We've had some interesting plane rides recently.

1:14:34 Best Of I've had some...

1:14:35 Adam You get a little Xanax on the plane? A little booze? Yeah. And plus, you guys are like evil can evil. You have a lot of injuries. You have to have doctors prescribe you painkillers and stuff.

1:14:46 Best Of That is true. We do experience a lot of pain.

1:14:49 Adam You do experience pain and it's important to numb that pain in your profession.

1:14:54 Best Of For the TV show, we're here to promote Wild Boys. Sure. I really don't think that Wild Boys is as entertaining as a reality TV show. All of our off-camera time would be...

1:15:06 Drew So you need to have an Osborne...

1:15:08 Best Of I'm not saying that we need to. I'm just saying none of it would be arable. So, like, from how shocking we strive to be on TV, it's our most shocking moments that are nowhere near the cameras.

1:15:18 Drew That are real.

1:15:19 Best Of Just about universally.

1:15:20 Adam Just a whole...

1:15:21 Best Of We could have done a two-part... We genuinely live our...

1:15:22 Adam Two-part special on Bangin the Fat Canadian.

1:15:25 Drew Could have been the mini-series.

1:15:28 Adam That could have been a couple weeks of programming.

1:15:32 Best Of Even as fat as she was, it was only a few minutes. I still have my stamina issues, guys. Really? But the thing is, how can a man feel embarrassed about premature ejaculation when by definition it's the most man can compliment a woman?

1:15:58 Adam It's a real tip of the ball.

1:15:59 Best Of It's the most flattering, the most simple, most flattering act that a man can...

1:16:03 Drew And from an evolutionary perspective, I mean, that's how you're going to pass the stuff along.

1:16:07 Best Of Exactly, you know, and it's like I say it every single time I hear, is that it? Are you done? You know, you've got to be kidding me. You know, like, what about me? I've heard it all. And every single time I say the same thing, I say...

1:16:21 Drew Very, very good natured about this.

1:16:23 Best Of Every single time I say, yeah, I say, you know, it's not my fault. You're so damn hot, you know?

1:16:29 Caller I mean, of course... Everyone's pulled the move where you put it in, you do a few pumps, and then you feel like you're going to explode. You're like, oh, we shouldn't be doing this without a condom.

1:16:41 Best Of I think that's really what keeps the Wild Boys clean is we're both such premature ejaculators that we actually use condoms as like...

1:16:48 Drew You're just not in there long enough to catch anything.

1:16:50 Best Of You know, like, I need that layer of latex in between me and the situation to try not to be so fast. Well, you know, we're embarrassed if we don't wear a condom.

1:17:02 Drew How long with the condom?

1:17:05 Best Of It depends on how much drugs and alcohol are involved. But three minutes more, you know, like, and I've even been in situations where with, like, you know, with a condom on and with my bro in the room, you know, like filming or not, I've had bros pick up the camera because they realized I started and before they could turn the damn thing on, I was finished. Wow. You know, and I've had, like, I've had round, like round number two be and, and three be faster than the first. I'll be, I'll recharge. Wow. I'll reload within, like, 15, 20 minutes and then, and then genuinely be just as fast. Not all the time, though.

1:17:40 Adam Well, let me, uh, Steve touched on something I thought was interesting earlier, which was he was saying, why should he be punished for his evolutionary advantage?

1:17:49 Best Of Exactly.

1:17:50 Drew And I was thinking, though, and his compliment.

1:17:52 Best Of How can you flatter a woman more? Right. What's more testimony to the fact that you're turned on than, than blasting?

1:17:59 Adam Right. And, well, perhaps jewelry, but the point is, the point is, is I was thinking about the same, same could be argued for the fat chick. She just process processes food more efficiently. She gets more energy out of that. What's wrong with our society skinny chick does, but yet we punish her. So we punished a man who's more efficient and we punished a woman who's more efficient from a psychological perspective.

1:18:23 Best Of You know, if you, if you put yourself in the, in the position of the woman, like, uh, a premature, ejaculation is, is, is extremely flattering. The ultimate tip of the hat. Whereas, whereas the ultimate, the ultimate attack on a woman is to be left there, you know, say 30, 45 minutes into it, where the late, the lady's no longer moist and then it becomes uncomfortable for her. That's right. And she's just trying.

1:18:47 Drew Five or six minutes into it.

1:18:48 Best Of Right. Yeah. And you know, and, and, and that's the, that's the worst, that's the worst thing that can happen to a woman. She's sitting there saying, what's wrong with you? You're right.

1:18:57 Adam She's not dead.

1:18:57 Best Of She's thinking, what's wrong with me?

1:18:59 Adam She has a new name. It's Steve-O.

1:19:00 Drew Steve-O, thy name is Chilery.

1:19:01 Best Of She's thinking, what's wrong with me? Why can't I get this guy off? You know, what, am I not hot? You know, like. Right.

1:19:06 Drew And when in fact, it's just a biological thing.

1:19:08 Best Of You know, and, and so that's why.

1:19:10 Caller Sometimes the ugly ones get me even more excited. Like I've been, I've been humping a girl before that's so hideous. I'm like, I'm thinking to myself, Chris, you are gnarly.

1:19:21 Best Of Because the actual act of sex, the wild boys can take it or leave it. It's bragging to each other and the rest of the crew. That we do it for.

1:19:29 Caller Sure, with the digital cameras, we can prove it.

1:19:32 Best Of And now these new digital cameras, it's not only just bragging, it's show and tell.

1:19:38 Caller Let's take a little break.

1:19:40 Best Of I've been putting together some memory cards.

1:19:43 Adam Chris Bonnius is here. Steve-O. Oh, they're having a good time. They're going to start bottoming out soon.

1:19:49 Best Of No, we are out. You goofy little fart sniffer.

1:19:52 Drew Right over the cliff. Poor little Chris over here. He's weird now.

1:19:57 Caller We're getting hotter and hotter.

1:19:59 Best Of Why is it that when you rub your balls while you're jerking off, that it feels so much better?

1:20:04 Drew I haven't noticed that.

1:20:05 Best Of Dude, it does. Damn it, it does.

1:20:08 Adam These questions and others will be...

1:20:09 Drew Drew words are rarely said. Is that when you're thinking about how gnarly you are, or is that just so you can do it?

1:20:14 Best Of This is stuff, dude.

1:20:15 Adam Let's get to the show. We got to get back on the track here. We got to take Drew. No more talking.

1:20:20 Caller We're taking a break.

1:20:22 Adam Drew, please, bite the tongue. We'll be right back after this.

1:20:26 Loveline.

1:20:27 Caller Okay. Wait. Wait. My hair.

1:20:30 My hair.

1:20:30 Caller We'll be right back.

1:20:32 Adam Live 105. Hey, yo, it's the best of Loveline. Out with the Wild Boys and in with Dear Dear Friend from the great band Korn, Jonathan Davis. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, Jonathan Davis here from the great Korn. The... All right, so where are we?

1:21:08 Drew We're taking calls. I selected this call because she's calling from Bakersfield.

1:21:12 Adam Anna.

1:21:13 Caller Hey.

1:21:14 Adam You're 14.

1:21:15 Caller Yeah.

1:21:16 Adam What's up?

1:21:18 Caller I was having sex with my boyfriend like three weeks ago, and it was my first time.

1:21:23 Adam Hold on, Jonathan, you speak fluent Bakersfield.

1:21:26 Drew She was having sex with her boyfriend like three weeks ago.

1:21:28 Adam Three weeks ago.

1:21:29 Caller Okay.

1:21:31 Drew Yes, and?

1:21:33 Caller And a couple of days later, like, my boyfriend was hurting me a lot.

1:21:38 Caller All right, hold on.

1:21:40 Adam What'd she say, Jonathan?

1:21:41 Caller For a couple days.

1:21:43 Drew For a couple days. Her stomach was hurting her a lot. Her stomach was hurting her a lot.

1:21:50 Adam Jonathan, ask her how old the guy was. Okay. Anna?

1:21:58 Drew Yeah.

1:21:59 Adam Okay, go, go, Jonathan.

1:22:00 Drew How old was the guy?

1:22:02 Adam 21.

1:22:04 Drew Okay.

1:22:05 Adam 21. I thought she said 66.

1:22:08 Drew I thought she said something wrong.

1:22:10 Adam All right. So, oh, 21.

1:22:13 Drew Okay, 14 with a 21-year-old translator.

1:22:16 Caller 14.

1:22:17 Drew And the stomach hurt for two days afterwards.

1:22:20 Caller Yeah.

1:22:21 Drew She understood me. She understood you.

1:22:22 Adam I guess she speaks a little English.

1:22:24 Drew She's fluent.

1:22:24 Adam All right, so, Anna, Anna, I'm sorry. Anna, what, well, first off, why are you sleeping with the 21-year-old?

1:22:30 Drew That's what we do there.

1:22:32 Adam That's what you do?

1:22:34 Caller When you're together, you're my boyfriend, you know?

1:22:36 Drew Yeah, well, he's... Hold on. What? I can't understand. What'd she say?

1:22:39 Caller She says her boyfriend.

1:22:40 Drew Her boyfriend. That's why they're together. Okay, Anna, you know that he's a criminal, right? No. Yes, he's a criminal for sleeping with you. And when you were 21 and you realize how creepy the guys would be that would actually sleep with a 14 year old, you will flip out.

1:22:56 Adam Yeah.

1:22:57 Drew I know now it seems cool.

1:22:58 Adam I do some math, by the way. By the time she's 21, nine kids.

1:23:02 Drew Yeah, I think so.

1:23:05 Adam Are you using protection?

1:23:07 Caller Yes.

1:23:08 Drew Make sure she got that. Yes. She got it. No, no, make sure she understood. Are you using protection?

1:23:13 Caller Yes.

1:23:14 Adam Ask her, Jonathan, ask her what kind of birth control she's using.

1:23:19 Drew What kind of birth control are you using?

1:23:22 Caller No, I'm not using protection, I'm not using protection.

1:23:26 Adam I really didn't understand that one.

1:23:28 Caller It feels spun.

1:23:29 Adam Do you know him? Jonathan doesn't know.

1:23:31 Drew That's spun talk.

1:23:32 Adam Jonathan speaks, by the way, he not only speaks Bakersfieldly and he speaks Bakersfield tweaker.

1:23:38 Drew Why? I speak tweaker.

1:23:39 Adam In many dialects.

1:23:40 Drew I heard a little tweaker coming in there. That's spun. Yeah, I heard tweaker.

1:23:44 Caller Anna?

1:23:44 Drew Totally. Anna, you doing a lot of speed?

1:23:48 Caller No, I don't do that stuff. I don't. I'm against that.

1:23:51 Drew What did you mean when, Jonathan asked this, when Adam said they're using protection and she said yes, what was she referring to? I think condoms. Well, she said no birth control.

1:24:01 Adam No, I think, look.

1:24:02 Drew A gun.

1:24:03 Adam Let me give the definition of protection sexually. In Bakersfield, it's putting a towel down on the bed.

1:24:09 Caller So you don't mess up protection.

1:24:11 Adam The bed. Protecting the mattress.

1:24:13 Drew The bedclothes. Yes. All right, Anna, this is a messed up situation, my dear. It really is a mess.

1:24:18 Adam All right, baby doll. What are we gonna do with you? You're 14.

1:24:21 Drew You're gonna get pregnant. This guy's a criminal. No. And you may have a pelvic infection. You need to get to see a doctor right away.

1:24:27 Adam Yeah.

1:24:28 Drew That pain in your belly for four days can be all kinds of things.

1:24:31 Adam And by the way, James Brown speaks better English than you do. Do you understand? He's more understandable.

1:24:40 Drew So you need to get yourself to a Planned Parenthood or somewhere right away where we can get some help with this.

1:24:44 Adam You're not high or drunk or anything.

1:24:46 Caller No, no, no. I'm sick.

1:24:49 Drew You're what?

1:24:50 Caller I'm sick. I'm a fool.

1:24:52 Drew Jonathan?

1:24:53 Adam She's upset.

1:24:54 Drew She's upset. You're upset?

1:24:55 Caller I'm sick.

1:24:57 Adam She's sick. She's sick. Do you have a... are you from...

1:25:00 Drew Are you sure you're from Bagelsville, Jonathan? You're actually from Bagelsville? I've been gone a long time. That's right. You sort of lose track of the language.

1:25:07 Adam Have you... Anna, do you have a nationality or an accent or something?

1:25:13 Caller I'm Mexican.

1:25:15 Adam You're Mexican? All right. But you speak... Are you bilingual?

1:25:19 Caller Yes.

1:25:19 Adam Oh, you are. So you speak Spanish and what other language?

1:25:23 Caller English.

1:25:24 Caller Oh, okay.

1:25:25 Adam What did she say?

1:25:26 Drew Bagelsville.

1:25:27 Adam Okay.

1:25:27 Drew All right, Anna.

1:25:28 Adam Listen, listen, listen, baby.

1:25:31 Drew Please take care of yourself. Please get over to Planned Hair to get a pelvic exam. Please get on some regular...

1:25:35 Adam Don't end up like all your friends.

1:25:38 Drew Oh, this guy's a criminal. Come on. My God, let your dad or mom know this guy's sleeping with you and he will be arrested immediately.

1:25:43 Adam You will be pregnant at 15 and drop out of school and take some crappy job. I know you got plans. Everyone's got a plan except for they have no plan.

1:25:52 Drew Well, the plan is not a... Yeah, it's a dream. It's not even a dream. It's a pipe dream.

1:25:58 Adam And you know what? Here's what I'm saying, everyone. Please, do not sit around and just let life happen to you or on you. This is what so many people, when you're downtrodden, it's easy to do. I know. I come from that environment. I'm sure Jonathan does as well. You just, you come from poor, you come from downtrodden, you come from people whose motto is, you know, life's a bitch and then you die. And you just, you sit around and have people essentially take advantage of you, rape you. I mean, she's 14, she's with a 21 year old. And by the way, when you're downtrodden, you don't even know you're getting ripped off or raped or screwed or whatever.

1:26:34 Drew Literally, it's like what's supposed to be happening.

1:26:35 Adam Yeah. Yeah. You think people are taking care of you when they're not. Next thing you know, you're pregnant. Here's the thing. If you want to be successful in life or even forget about success, just not having a horrible life, not get thrown in the joint and pregnant and get disease, whatever, you want a little medical and dental insurance, you have to step up. You have to say like, no, you have to say, no, I'm not going to do this or I'm not going to do what I want all the time or I'm not going to do what feels good every second of the day. Yeah, everything's a pain in the ass. Going and getting a condom is a pain in the ass. Studying for an exam is a pain in the ass. Turning the TV off and reading a book is a pain in the ass. Doing 10 pushups is a pain in the ass. All that crap that gets you somewhere is a pain in the ass. You don't want to do it. You end up doing whatever you want to do. You eat whatever you want. You ingest whatever you want. Let me tell you something. Hi-C tastes better than grapefruit juice. Hi-C with a little gin in it tastes even better. That's it. It just becomes easy.

1:27:33 Drew That's Adam's drink. Is that your drink?

1:27:35 Adam Hi-C.

1:27:36 Drew Hi-C and gin?

1:27:37 Adam Yes. Hi-C and gin. That's my drink.

1:27:40 Drew He calls it high karate. It's a good time. Let's hear a chorus song.

1:27:44 Adam Here's what I'm saying though. You talk to everybody and they got a plan. You got no plan. You're going to work with animals, you're going to go into show business or something like that. No goddamn way. Whatever your plan is, you got to have discipline and that's what you're missing.

1:28:02 Drew Your plan's got to be working.

1:28:03 Adam And that's the part that people don't understand. They think that a fun job doesn't have any discipline. Oh, well, Jonathan's doing corn. He doesn't have to work anymore. He's doing what he loves to do. Yeah, he's doing what he loves to do, but he's still got to do it. And you don't want to do it every day. No. And that's what the discipline is. That's why he gives himself an extra credit in producing.

1:28:22 Caller Yeah. See? All right.

1:28:24 Adam Corn, everybody. Jonathan Davis here from Corn. It's not changed a bit, although we've probably seen each other outside of this studio, even though I can't believe it's been six years. Six years. Wow. Where's the time go, Drew? Seriously, dude, where is it?

1:28:41 Drew I've been looking for it, but I'm really...

1:28:43 Adam You know what I was thinking about? I was getting a little... I was getting kind of heavy on myself, you know? I was getting heavy and I was like driving my car and I was thinking to myself, you know, everyone calls in the show, we can't stand them. I yelled at everybody and then I think to myself, you know, for the amount of time that you're on this planet, in terms of like the Earth's calendar and everything, it's really just a heartbeat, just like a rabbit's heartbeat that you're on the planet. The people that you're on the planet with at this particular time, it's really a strange shirt of fraternity if you think about it, because of all the different times you could have lived, either past or future.

1:29:21 Drew That's heavy, dude. How much pot were you smoking? How stone were you when you thought of that?

1:29:26 Adam I know, I wasn't smoking.

1:29:28 Caller I added a brownie.

1:29:29 Drew You added a brownie, yeah.

1:29:30 Caller Yeah.

1:29:31 Adam I put it in the butter and I took the THC out of it. No, I was thinking, I was thinking, you know, you're really not, you're on this planet with a handful of people and then you're all going to be gone. There's going to be, you know, none of these people were here 100 years ago and they were going to be here 100 years from now. It's weird that you're here with this small, and I immediately started honking and yelling at the person that was in front of me for not turning on, they stopped at the right for too long.

1:29:52 Caller Hey, brother.

1:29:53 Adam Hey, brother. I know we're on this planet and we're sharing it, but don't make me kick your ass. Yeah, I just realized I started honking immediately. Yeah, heavy, man. You know what I'm saying? We should get along, man.

1:30:08 Caller You know what I mean?

1:30:09 Adam Because we're all here at the same time. You know what I'm saying, man? All right. I don't know how long the planet's been here. I don't even know how long people have been here, but you're here for a very little thin slice of time.

1:30:22 Drew Well, and it changes day to day or hour to hour, too. Yeah. It's composed.

1:30:27 Adam Yeah. Yeah. But it's just a small group. You're especially anyone within a year or five years one way or the other.

1:30:32 Drew Your age.

1:30:33 Adam It's a crazy coincidence that, I don't know if it's a coincidence, but just you're here for this very short ride at the very same time. You don't think of it that way, do you?

1:30:42 Drew No.

1:30:42 Adam No. Heavy, huh, Chris?

1:30:47 Caller Yeah.

1:30:49 Adam Yeah.

1:30:50 Drew Sintillating.

1:30:50 Adam It's freaky that we're here at the same time, right, dude?

1:30:53 Totally, dude.

1:30:55 Drew Oh, Chris is. Let's tease this call and then go to take a break.

1:30:58 Adam All right. Michael, I mean Michelle.

1:31:01 Drew Huh?

1:31:02 Hello.

1:31:02 Adam Michelle, 21?

1:31:04 Caller Yes.

1:31:04 Adam What's up?

1:31:07 Caller Well, I think I might be addicted to sex. I don't seem to be getting enough of it. And it doesn't matter how many times I do it a week or how many partners I have, in fact. I just, I'm like, I mean, part of it too is that I can't orgasm with any of them.

1:31:31 Drew Nice.

1:31:32 Adam All right.

1:31:32 Drew So it makes perfect sense why you should keep going back because it's unpleasant.

1:31:36 Adam Yeah.

1:31:37 Drew All right.

1:31:37 Adam Hold on, Michelle. She's got that bottomless vagina that can never be filled. Whoopie vagina.

1:31:42 Caller I can please myself.

1:31:44 Adam Oh, you can?

1:31:45 Caller Yes.

1:31:46 Drew Are you doing that all the time? Are you doing that a lot?

1:31:50 Caller Well, yeah. I mean, I have to get mine somehow.

1:31:53 Drew Well, yeah, Michelle.

1:31:55 Adam Drew, tease the call.

1:31:57 Drew Let's go.

1:31:57 Adam Let's tease it.

1:31:58 Drew Break.

1:31:58 Adam Yeah. You're on hour 14 of the call. Pretty heavy, though, right, man? I mean, we're all here at the same time, right, man?

1:32:06 Drew It's fraternity, man.

1:32:07 Adam Wow. Jonathan Davis here, man, from Corn. It's like, you know, it's like, we landed on this rock at the same time, dude. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, man. Yeah. Let's take a break, man. Chris?

1:32:24 Caller That's cool, man.

1:32:25 Adam I'm going to need you to leave the planet, man.

1:32:27 Caller We'll be right back.

1:32:28 Adam Kind of stinking it up for me and Johnny, you know what I'm saying? All right, we'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

1:32:34 Caller All right, guys, here's the deal.

1:32:36 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person.

1:32:39 Adam One call is all you need to make.

1:32:40 Caller Call the Dateline.

1:32:41 Caller 877-889-DATE.

1:32:58 Adam Well, that's the show. I want to thank the darkness, not really, but Dave Navarro and Elisha Cuthbert and the Korn and Wild Boys and all that.

1:33:06 Drew The Korn.

1:33:07 Adam The Korn.

1:33:07 Drew Wow.

1:33:08 Adam And the Wild Boys and for being unwilling participants in our little experiment known as the best.

1:33:14 Drew Also having ranked amongst the best.

1:33:17 Adam Oh yeah.

1:33:17 Drew Yeah. We're thankful for that.

1:33:18 Adam Yeah. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying, mahalo.

1:33:24 Caller This has been Loveline.

1:33:28 Adam The opinions expressed in the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or the station. The producer for Loveline is Aningold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Wednesday, December 22, 2004