1:03
Stryker
Hey, we're here.
1:05
Voiceover
I've been talked to by Missi Pyle. Hello, this is Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191. I am Stryker, in for Adam Carolla, who is in where, Dr. Drew?
1:13
Stryker
Italy.
1:14
Stryker
Hold on, how come I can't hear anything?
1:15
Stryker
Turn up a bit, there we go.
1:17
Stryker
Now I can hear. Why is he in Italy? How is he in Italy? Is he working there?
1:20
Stryker
He went with Kimmel and those guys, and they're just having a vacation. They're all Italian, they've never seen their homeland. And it was about time. And it's his 40th birthday.
1:27
Stryker
Ah, okay, so that's a good reason. So wherever Jimmy goes, does Adam usually follow?
1:32
Stryker
That, yeah.
1:33
Stryker
No, I mean, seriously, they seem to go a lot, you know, if there's a race in Long Beach, they're there.
1:37
Stryker
I was just thinking of that old movie where angels go, trouble follows. And that's, yeah, that's Adam.
1:41
Stryker
All right, well, I'm here, I'm gonna do my best tonight. I've had the craziest, funnest Memorial Day weekend. Missi, we're definitely gonna talk to you in a second.
1:49
Stryker
Someday, don't worry, Stryker shows in about 10 minutes. No, no, seriously.
1:52
Stryker
I can't believe I'm alive right now.
1:53
Stryker
What happened?
1:54
Stryker
Vegas all weekend. All I know is that 11 a.m. on, what day is today? Monday?
2:00
Stryker
31st, yeah.
2:01
Stryker
Okay, 11 a.m. Sunday, I was still in my same outfit as 2 p.m. the day before.
2:06
Stryker
Ooh.
2:07
Stryker
Yes, and I feel, I felt lovely.
2:09
Stryker
That's because you were gambling through the night or what?
2:11
Stryker
You could call it gambling at Dre's out there. Hello, Jesse DeDre's and at Light, a guy named Larry, it was unbelievable, and I hit a jackpot on a slot machine.
2:24
Drew
I generally don't hit the jackpot.
2:26
Stryker
Really? How about gambling?
2:28
Drew
I do a little bit. Actually, I heard you talking about the Wheel of Fortune game.
2:32
Stryker
That's the one I hit on.
2:33
Drew
I had heard that.
2:35
Stryker
Do you mean the wheel?
2:36
Stryker
Yes.
2:37
Stryker
Not the wheel.
2:38
Stryker
No, not the huge wheel. It is a slot, and this sounds so wussy that I was playing a slot machine, but this Wheel of Fortune game is so god damn good.
2:46
Drew
I get it, and I lost $400 in it, and everyone around me was winning, and I just kept putting another hundred thinking, it's gonna go, it's gonna go, but it never did.
2:56
Stryker
Here's what happened with me. I was at the 50 cent machine. You hit like play three credits, so it's $1.50 each spin, and I was like, I was down, I was up, I was down, I was up, but the most exciting thing is, you're praying to God you get in the last row, it says spin, which means you get to spin the wheel, and all you're spinning the wheel goes doot, doot, doot, doot, and you press the button, and way above the game is the wheel is spinning, it's got like a 25, a 50, a 30, a 100, a 500, and a thousand on there.
3:22
Drew
Did you?
3:23
Stryker
I hit the thousand.
3:26
Drew
Woo, give me some Missi.
3:27
Stryker
Hit the thousand, like people went crazy, circling the game, I was screaming, jumping for joy, I had a Red Bull vodka, that went on the floor, it was lovely.
3:36
Drew
I was the person sitting next to you thinking, I'm gonna put a hundred dollars in and get a thousand too.
3:40
Stryker
I wanna kill that eight hole. Yeah. No, but, not to deflate, take the winds out of your sailor, but how much of that did you actually leave with?
3:48
Stryker
This is the first time ever where I said, forget it, I'm done. And I didn't gamble anymore.
3:53
Stryker
So what did you do last night?
3:54
Stryker
Last night I was at Studio 54, and then I went to after hours at like the Rio or something. Yeah, and then I, yeah, that's what I did. So I didn't gamble, it was good. It was really good. Anyway, so that's my story, I'm excited. I'm tired, but I'm good, but I'm on energy, and it's lovely.
4:10
Drew
You seem great.
4:10
Stryker
Thanks. Do I look all right? Do I look tired?
4:14
Drew
No, you look beautiful.
4:15
Stryker
I look beautiful, really? You look beautiful. It's a Puma jacket you're wearing, I like it. Wait, you've been in so many of my favorite movies. You were in 50 First Dates.
4:23
Drew
Well, I was, yeah, I was in that.
4:24
Stryker
Just, I mean, who cares if you weren't the main star, but you got to be in an Adam Sandler movie. Do you know Adam?
4:29
Drew
I had just met him then.
4:31
Stryker
Okay.
4:31
Drew
But I've seen him a few times since then.
4:38
Stryker
And you're in the movie Soul Plan, which came out this weekend.
4:40
Drew
Yes, it did.
4:41
Stryker
I have not seen it. How was Calvin Brotus? Snoop Dogg.
4:45
Drew
I was going to say, hmm.
4:47
Stryker
Who's that?
4:47
Drew
Everybody always asks about Snoop Dogg. They want to know, you know, what he was like on the set, what he was doing on the set. I mean, he's a great guy.
4:55
Stryker
He's the same guy.
4:56
Drew
He's the same, he's, you know.
4:58
Stryker
Billowing clouds of pot smoke all around him. All around. Bishop Don Juan with his gold head.
5:03
Drew
Bishop Don Juan was there with the chalice.
5:05
Stryker
All the time with the golden chalice and the diamond studded cane.
5:08
Drew
My favorite thing was, you know, we had a photo call and he rolled up and the first car was like.
5:12
Stryker
The green chartreuse.
5:13
Drew
Well, the first car was this giant Escalade limo and then the next car was the Snoop DeVille.
5:20
Stryker
Oh yeah.
5:21
Drew
Which was just delightful. And then some other nondescript giant car carrying probably four or five bodyguards.
5:26
Stryker
He is the nicest guy.
5:27
Stryker
Is he really? I've met him, I met him.
5:31
Stryker
He's a very nice guy.
5:32
Drew
I didn't really work with him very much, but I met him at the premiere officially. And he told me that I was a tall, sexy woman. He did? I blushed.
5:43
Stryker
So you know, he's a single man now.
5:45
Drew
Well.
5:46
Stryker
And yeah, I don't know what your status is.
5:48
Stryker
I didn't know he wasn't single at the time.
5:49
Stryker
He just got divorced. Or he's getting divorced.
5:52
Stryker
I heard that. That was the first I heard about the marriage.
5:54
Stryker
So I'm thinking of- Me too.
5:56
Stryker
Really? Really?
5:57
Stryker
So were you a tall, sexy lady behind the scenes too?
6:00
Drew
What? I don't know.
6:01
Stryker
What does that mean? You were also in a movie which I am dying to see because it has Vince Vaughn in it, who's probably a lovely man also, right? And Ben Stiller, Dodgeball.
6:11
Drew
Yes.
6:12
Stryker
You are in that.
6:13
Stryker
And Rip Torn is in that.
6:14
Stryker
Rip Torn is in that.
6:17
Stryker
What is that coming out?
6:18
Drew
I think it premieres on or opens on the 18th of June.
6:21
Stryker
Nice.
6:22
Drew
Yeah.
6:22
Stryker
Very good. You're a working actress.
6:25
Drew
That kicks ass. Once in a while.
6:27
Stryker
That's awesome. But like the best movies.
6:29
Drew
Literally like last year and this year, I was able to be a part of a lot of great movies. Mostly smaller parts.
6:35
Stryker
Where are you from?
6:35
Drew
I'm originally from Texas.
6:38
Stryker
And how long have you been in LA?
6:40
Drew
I've been in LA about five years, I guess.
6:42
Stryker
So you're raised in Tennessee.
6:44
Drew
Yeah, I lived in Texas and then I moved to Tennessee.
6:46
Stryker
Where?
6:47
Drew
Just outside of Memphis, Germantown.
6:49
Stryker
Where? Just some great places. I was in Knoxville a couple weeks ago. Oh my God, what a beautiful town.
6:55
Drew
Yeah, Tennessee is amazing.
6:56
Stryker
Amazing.
6:57
Drew
It's beautiful, especially East Tennessee. Just past Knoxville is gorgeous.
7:01
Stryker
I've never been there, I've never been anywhere.
7:02
Stryker
That's true.
7:03
Stryker
Especially to Vegas. To Vegas, I surely have. Should we take some calls, Drew?
7:08
Stryker
Yeah, don't you want to hear about the fight with Clema Tifa, at least?
7:11
Stryker
Oh, well, I think we should, we can't blow her, you know what, right off the bat. Yeah, Michael, 24, what's going on? You're on Loveline.
7:20
Stryker
Yes, you.
7:22
Stryker
I was wondering how common or likely it is that a doctor can misdiagnose herpes.
7:27
Stryker
Very common. It's a very hard disorder to nail down without some doubt. Really, the only way we really know for sure that's what it was is when it comes back. That's sort of what confirms it. The only way other than that to absolutely confirm that you've got it is to grow it in a viral culture, and that's hard to do.
7:45
Stryker
Well, what's down there that? What happened?
7:47
Stryker
Yeah, what happened?
7:49
Stryker
Well, I'm seeing this girl, and she was showing me a book that she had from a previous relationship where each member filled out.
7:57
Stryker
It's called a wee magazine.
7:59
Stryker
Those types of things. And her regret was that she caught herpes from her first boyfriend, even though they both lost their virginity to each other. He messed around and then she got it. And I, of course, I know that once you get it, you have it forever and I don't want to get it. And so when I asked her about this, she said that it was a misdiagnosis and that it's not something that could be an issue. But I was just wondering if that's even feasible.
8:25
Stryker
It's feasible. It's absolutely, listen, first of all, it's always feasible that doctors can make and make a misdiagnosis. We are not infallible. That's always feasible. It's very common with herpes. But the fact that it hasn't come back yet doesn't mean that it wouldn't come back. So you kind of have to be careful. You should be using comments anyway.
8:43
Stryker
Can you grow out of herpes, meaning it's with you for life, but can it not reappear?
8:47
Stryker
It can not reappear and as time goes along, it tends to reappear less and less frequently. And so you're less and less contagious. But interestingly, when people are re-exposed to somebody new, oftentimes that causes a flare.
8:59
Drew
Really? Well, and if you use a condom, you're pretty much not gonna catch it.
9:04
Stryker
Pretty good, pretty good. Especially somebody that's never had recurrences and the diagnosis isn't down. So that's what Michael needs to do is wear a condom.
9:11
Stryker
Now, how come it's so confusing with either a canker sore or a fever blister?
9:15
Stryker
All right, those are herpes. Now, if you do not engage in oral sex when somebody's pregnant.
9:19
Drew
Really, because you can actually get...
9:20
Stryker
You pass it.
9:21
Stryker
Can you get the real herpes down there from the thing?
9:23
Stryker
It's all the real herpes. This is the craziness about it. Ever since I've been doing Loveline, at the very beginning, that was one of the things that really troubled me was how nutty people got about herpes. We're talking about a cold sore. It just happens to not be in your mouth. Now, it has a significant issue for women because it may increase risk of cervical cancer and things. But that's...
9:39
Stryker
What is the look of it when it's on the wiener down there?
9:42
Stryker
No, seriously, it can look like a blister. It's the classic description. I always enjoy working with you, Stryker. You ask the greatest questions.
9:49
Stryker
Seriously, I mean...
9:50
Stryker
So herpes on the wiener generally looks like... It's just... Even Chris likes it.
9:54
Drew
And how many do you get at once?
9:56
Stryker
How many wieners? Usually, one. It depends, I guess. But the usual initial outbreak, the... You just got that. Oh, we've got a minute since. That initially the primary outbreak, the first outbreak is usually the most exuberant, the most intense. And it can be, it can look like large streaks or ulcerations, the classic appearance is clustered vesicles, meaning small blisters on a red base, clustering together. Kind of like...
10:26
Stryker
But what were you saying the first thing, a red streak?
10:29
Stryker
They can look like, sometimes the vesicles are very, very tiny, it just looks like a red streak. And sometimes they can break open and ulcerate. And it can be lots of different appearances.
10:38
Drew
And how long does a typical outbreak last?
10:41
Stryker
Primary outbreak or the recurrences? The primary outbreak is a good week. And sometimes it's associated with illness. You can be really sick. In fact, when I was back taking my boards, they had a board test question that said, you know, what's the incidence of meningitis in primary outbreaks of herpetic two, herpes type two? It was around 20%. Meningitis.
11:00
Stryker
All right, Ryan, you there? You're 25.
11:04
Adam
Got a question on quitting Vicodin.
11:06
Stryker
Yeah.
11:07
Adam
I'm trying to find out if I can do it on my own or do you have to really go to detox considering how long I've been on it?
11:12
Stryker
Ryan, I can only tell you that I personally have given up on detoxing people as an outpatient. It never, ever worked. You can get down to five tablets, 10 tablets, and magically, and you can stop for a couple weeks, even sometimes, and magically you go back without exception.
11:27
Adam
Yeah, that's what I found.
11:28
Stryker
Of course. And you, and by the way, detoxing is the easiest part of stopping opiates. The harder part is dealing with your addiction, and that's something you need to get very intensively involved with, because if I could do the same thing as heroin, basically, as far as your brain is concerned.
11:41
Adam
Yeah.
11:41
Stryker
And so you need to get into an intensive program and get going. I mean, the longer you delay it, the longer this is gonna go on.
11:47
Stryker
How many do you take a day?
11:48
Adam
I got it down to like three at the most.
11:53
Stryker
That can cost you a bunch of money, obviously.
11:55
Stryker
Well, I'm sure he was up to 50 or 60.
11:56
Stryker
In a day.
11:57
Stryker
Right?
11:57
Stryker
Yeah, for a while it was about 30, 30 a day.
12:00
Stryker
More than that, come on.
12:01
Adam
No, 30 a day, seriously.
12:02
Stryker
All right, excuse me, my average patient is about 50.
12:05
Stryker
Really?
12:06
Adam
Yeah, about 30 a day, I've got it down to three for the last probably eight, nine months.
12:09
Stryker
Yeah, as far as your brain is concerned, don't matter. I mean, it's good you've done this, but it's still, the disease is still very, very, very active.
12:16
Stryker
Alex, you're on Loveline, you're 26.
12:19
Stryker
How you doing? It's fun to say I love you guys' show. You guys really helped me out in the last six years of my relationship.
12:27
Stryker
Uh-oh.
12:28
Stryker
Yeah, oh yeah, I was gonna see if you could help me out now.
12:30
Stryker
All right.
12:32
Stryker
Yeah, January I was run over by a vehicle. I'm a tow truck driver. And uh.
12:37
Stryker
What kind of car ran you over?
12:38
Stryker
A armored truck.
12:41
Stryker
You're a tow truck.
12:43
Stryker
You were run over? No, an armored car ran over him. He's a tow truck driver. Yeah, armored truck. Was it filled with cash at the time?
12:49
Stryker
Well, that's important.
12:50
Stryker
Yeah, all the federal armored cars.
12:52
Stryker
Those are heavy cars.
12:55
Stryker
Where'd it get you?
12:55
Stryker
In the legs, the stomach, head, arm?
12:57
Stryker
Oh.
12:57
Stryker
The entire body.
13:00
Adam
What?
13:02
Stryker
What happened? Your truck malfunctioned and ran back off your truck? Off your red?
13:07
Adam
Yeah.
13:08
Stryker
I was dispatched to tell his armored vehicle that it was hit head on at 70 miles an hour by another vehicle. And I was standing behind the vehicle talking to the armored guard, the guard of the vehicle at the time. And I got a major head trauma out of it. Doctor's been lying to me since day one and all this and that.
13:30
Stryker
Been lying to you about what?
13:31
Stryker
They put me on a ZOWAP for antiviral depression.
13:35
Stryker
Right.
13:36
Stryker
And didn't tell me any of the side effects I need to watch out for.
13:40
Stryker
Well, what side effects are you concerned with?
13:43
Stryker
The rare side effects.
13:45
Stryker
Oh, I'm sure there's no way a doctor's gonna be able to review all the rare side effects. So there's no way you would have gotten those anyway. So what happened?
13:54
Stryker
The doctor was out, put me on ZOWAP and I started working and I started getting down. I started calling about it.
14:01
Stryker
You started getting what?
14:02
Stryker
Started getting down.
14:03
Stryker
Down, started getting more depressed.
14:05
Stryker
Yeah, I was getting down, getting more depressed. And I started calling the doctor. He thought I was at the point where I just wanted to get it by another car and just say, screw it.
14:15
Stryker
So you should have been in the hospital right then.
14:17
Stryker
Yeah. And well, the doctor told me it was all normal. It's normal. About four weeks ago, I just snapped at my wife and said some things that I shouldn't have said. And she left, took our daughter. I want to know what I could do to get her back now.
14:32
Stryker
Well, none of this has anything to do with the medication. This says you're not getting enough treatment. You need to, you haven't seen a psychiatrist, have you?
14:39
Stryker
Yeah, well, he's not helping anyway. He's only here for the money. Yes, hold on.
14:44
Stryker
So far you blamed one doctor. Now you're blaming a psychiatrist.
14:48
Stryker
I guess nobody can help you then, if everyone's in there just out for you, just to make things tough on you. You know, listen, you've got to trust some people, Alex. And I don't know if the head injury's making it difficult for you to sort of do that or.
14:59
Stryker
Yeah, I've never been in anything dramatic before.
15:03
Stryker
Well, something is making you kind of paranoid because people really, they're just, yes, they're trying to make a living, but they're also trying to help you. And you've got to participate with them in this and go back and connect them and trust somebody to, you know, find somebody you trust and stay with it. But it sounds like you need to be in a hospital, in a psychiatric hospital, and really find something that where if you're thinking.
15:20
Stryker
How do you go about getting in there?
15:22
Stryker
You can't just walk in? Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. I mean, you're in Denver. There's lots of facilities there. Just call admitting office and say, look, I'm thinking I'm hurting myself. I got violent with my wife or aggressive. Something's very, very wrong. Something's very, and I've had a head injury. And sometimes, and listen, and by the way, by psychiatric, we're not necessarily saying psychological. You have every biological reason to have dysfunction. Your brain may be a seizure disorder. We don't know what this is yet. You've had a bad injury. Are you paraplegic or anything now because of all this?
15:51
Stryker
No, I have a hard time remembering things and all that.
15:57
Stryker
Yeah, but your spinal cord and your guts and everything are okay? Have you been rolled over?
16:02
Stryker
Yeah, I got knee damage on my right leg. So there's just damage.
16:08
Stryker
All right, Alex.
16:09
Drew
I have a question just about antidepressants. I had read something in the paper that there are listed a bunch of antidepressants that actually have reverse effects.
16:19
Stryker
Anytime you put a medication in your mouth, you're risking your life. That's the way it is with medication. Now, if that risk is worth 20% of people with depression, die of depression. That's much higher than the potential life-threatening risk of a medication, much higher. Same thing is true of say, like we talk about pregnancy. Pregnancy is a life-threatening condition. So you have to weigh birth control pill risks against the life-threatening condition of pregnancy. You don't want to put medicine in your mouth unless you have a condition that requires treatment. And antidepressants sometimes can go to suicidality, sometimes it can cause panic, sleep disturbances, pain, thought disturbances, you know, it can go wrong. But if you're being monitored and cared for properly, they can find things that are helpful to you. Alex got a very complex situation, needs help.
17:03
Stryker
All right, let's go to Kat.
17:05
Stryker
Kat, 16, what's going on?
17:07
Stryker
Oops, hold on here.
17:08
Stryker
Number two. Kat. What's going on?
17:14
Stryker
Okay, my girlfriend and I wanted to try something new, so we decided to try anal sex with the strap on.
17:21
Stryker
Lovely, yes.
17:22
Stryker
Good times.
17:23
Stryker
Very good, Drew.
17:24
Stryker
Yeah.
17:25
Stryker
Are you Mormon? No, I'm not Mormon. That's a longstanding joke.
17:32
Stryker
No, I don't.
17:33
Stryker
Hey, Anderson, help me out here. Are you a Mormon? We play that. Every single caller answers that question.
17:39
Stryker
Yes.
17:39
Stryker
He just plays it. Yes, Kat?
17:46
Stryker
So, yeah, and I was talking to my, I have a psychologist, because my mom's convinced that I'm not gay and that I have to see a psychologist. So, I was telling her about that, and she said that anal sex could possibly lead to like some sort of cancer, like colon cancer.
18:01
Stryker
No.
18:02
Stryker
No?
18:02
Stryker
I wish I could say that. I think God will grow a tumor with you doing that, but that's about it.
18:08
Stryker
Have you tried it yet with your girlfriend?
18:09
Stryker
Yeah, we have.
18:10
Stryker
And is it, you give a thumbs up or thumbs down?
18:14
Stryker
Thumbs up.
18:15
Stryker
Thumbs up, really?
18:16
Stryker
I've called before.
18:18
Stryker
Yeah. What did we talk about?
18:20
Stryker
Yeah, she was the one that didn't last very long, but she's doing a lot better now, so.
18:24
Stryker
Now, a 19-year-old girl with a 16-year-old, is that still considered illegal?
18:28
Stryker
Well, they're within three years, and they're in California, so I think it's still okay.
18:31
Drew
Really? And that works as well with guys and girls as well?
18:35
Stryker
I think in California, you can be within three years.
18:37
Stryker
I wouldn't say that right now, on the air.
18:39
Stryker
Why?
18:40
Stryker
Give people a bad idea.
18:41
Stryker
No, I'm not saying it's good or right. I'm just saying that's stating what I think believes a lot of big.
18:45
Stryker
So, do you think you're a straight lesbian? Because, I mean, you're only 16 years old. I mean, if you're liking this.
18:49
Stryker
Well, see, I'm very butch. I'm more of a giver than a... Like, I've got the short hair, dressed like a boy. It's a really girly voice.
18:59
Stryker
So, you weren't receptive in this whole anal sex thing?
19:03
Stryker
I tried it, and I did like it, but the whole idea of a guy doing it, like, totally grosses me out.
19:10
Stryker
Yes, how dare you?
19:11
Stryker
So, I guess the bottom line is, Drew, she's not going to get cancer from using the strap-on, or having it.
19:15
Stryker
No, I wish I could say so. You can get all kinds of anal pathology and all kinds of problems holding you. I mean, listen, when you hit age 70, you're going to be very sorry you did this. Wishing you had. Wishing you had. That's all I'm telling you. Really? And, you know, it's tough enough to age without tearing apart the sphincters.
19:30
Stryker
Yeah, that's why I stay away from that, actually.
19:33
Drew
I say that to myself every morning.
19:36
Stryker
I think you're a straight lesbian. What? I'm still here. What's going on?
19:40
Stryker
We talked to him.
19:41
Stryker
You know, I'm 19 and when I'm masturbating, I don't have any trouble staying up at all. But when I get my girlfriend, I have a mixed problem between either premature ejaculation or, if not that, then I just can't stay up at all. And honestly, I don't know where to turn right now.
19:55
Stryker
Those are polar opposites. Either you're too quick or you can't do it.
19:59
Stryker
Yeah, pretty much.
20:00
Stryker
Have you thought of maybe, I don't know, masturbating before you're with her, so you're not gonna be too quick?
20:07
Stryker
Anything we need to know about this relationship? Are you overwhelmed? Is it too, is it, you know, anxiety you're looking for some?
20:14
Stryker
I'm kind of, I'm in school right now and it's really hard, but I really don't think that that should have anything to do with what's going on between the two of us, because we have a really good relationship besides that. And it's just, you know, she's used to having a lot more than what I'm giving her, and it's, you know, kind of putting strain on the relationship.
20:31
Stryker
Well, tell me about that. Loveline, tell me about that. Is this she sort of on you about that? Does she make you feel bad?
20:36
Stryker
No, she's not on me. I think it's, I think I worry about it more than she does.
20:42
Stryker
Well, what did you mean? You said you opened up with, she's used to a lot better than this. What do you mean? How did you come to understand that?
20:50
Stryker
Well, she's been with a lot more guys than I have girls.
20:53
Stryker
See, if you get a feeling here, we're going down this path.
20:55
Stryker
No confidence. Well, I wouldn't worry how many-
20:57
Stryker
She's so experienced. She expects more than this. That's all- You're projecting all that onto her. She's just somebody who's into you and would like to have a close experience.
21:05
Drew
And you're probably thinking about that the whole time.
21:07
Stryker
Oh, my God. You're completely doing yourself in with this.
21:10
Stryker
Yeah, your brain is messing you up before you even get in there, literally.
21:13
Stryker
Is there anything that, like, besides just maybe relaxing or something, that I could do about it?
21:19
Drew
Give yourself a pep talk.
21:22
Stryker
I think cut the BS out, Michael. I mean, you're doing something to this relationship for some reason. I don't know why you're sort of sabotaging it, but it's, you know, you're building this case. She's used to better, she's used to more. She's had lots of guys. I'm so inexperienced. Cut it out. Cut it out.
21:38
Drew
Have you ever had this problem before?
21:40
Stryker
How insulting to her, by the way. She just wants to have a relationship with you.
21:44
Stryker
Yeah.
21:45
Stryker
Come on.
21:46
Drew
Has this happened to you before with other women?
21:48
Stryker
No, she's actually the first girl I've been with.
21:51
Stryker
They're bingo right there.
21:53
Stryker
That's what I'm talking about.
21:54
Stryker
Get a little confidence, Michael. Give yourself a pep talk, as Missi said. And don't sell yourself short, just because she's been with probably 400 men.
22:02
Stryker
There's a corollary here. There's a corollary, which is why did you wait to have sex?
22:08
Stryker
I don't know. Just the way my parents had raised me and then I went out on my own and decided that I really don't want to live like that.
22:15
Stryker
And what is like that?
22:18
Stryker
Closed minded and not really living my life the way that I want to have fun.
22:22
Stryker
Be more specific.
22:25
Stryker
They raised me with a lot of the premarital sex ideals of, you know, don't do it till you're married.
22:32
Stryker
And they were just, that's their values or was there some sort of religious orientation to it or what?
22:37
Stryker
It was religious on my mom's side. My dad's, it was just ideals. But once I moved out, I didn't feel the need to live up to their ideals and I really didn't want to.
22:48
Stryker
That's fine. But you clearly still have all sorts of feelings about it and you got to kind of sort that out. So yeah. And you do put it all on your girlfriend, leave her alone. Just she's happy to be there. Just enjoy. Yeah, please. All right.
23:00
Stryker
Where are we going?
23:01
Stryker
Break. Is it break? Yeah.
23:02
Stryker
Yeah. I got to get on the ball with the break times. Missi Piles here on Loveline. She's in Soul Plane, which came out.
23:08
Adam
Yes. Yes.
23:08
Stryker
She's in Dodgeball.
23:09
Stryker
Talk to her everything.
23:10
Adam
Yeah.
23:11
Stryker
Everything.
23:11
Stryker
Fifty first date.
23:12
Stryker
I want to meet Adam Sandler. Can you hook that up?
23:14
Drew
Totally. He's out in the lobby.
23:15
Stryker
He's out there?
23:16
Drew
In the parking lot? And made him wait in the parking lot.
23:18
Stryker
He's waiting for me right now. Fine Anderson. We're taking a break now. More Loveline after this. Hello.
23:32
Stryker
As many as one in three Americans with HIV don't know it. To find a testing location near you, call toll-free 1-866-344-KNOW.
23:42
Stryker
All right, we are back on Loveline and Stryker, in for Adam Carolla, who is out of the country supposedly on Memorial Day. Drew, how was your weekend, by the way? Anything good?
23:54
Stryker
Nice. Took it easy. Hanging out with the kids? Of course. Had a little league and went to Universal Studios today.
24:00
Stryker
Nice. You go on the tram ride?
24:02
Stryker
No, went on the Back to the Future and the Jurassic Park.
24:05
Stryker
How could he not go on the tram ride? That's the staple of Universal Studios.
24:08
Stryker
You would think that these theme parks would want to set us up since we're on the radio stuff. No, I wait in line like everybody else. So I spent eight hours in line. I went for the ride.
24:16
Stryker
The Back to the Future ride.
24:17
Drew
The Back to the Future is the best though.
24:19
Stryker
Yeah, it's the best. Okay, everyone just close your eyes. We're coming up on King Kong who stands in at over 30 feet tall and weighs in at 13,000 pounds, 600 of which is synthetic fur. He made his debut in the 1933 RKO production starring Faye Ray.
24:33
Stryker
Did you do this?
24:34
Drew
Were you on tour again?
24:35
Stryker
No, I was not.
24:36
Stryker
He doesn't tour that many times. He, unlike me, has been set up, I guess, at the Universal Studios.
24:41
Stryker
No, no, no. I wait in the line, mister.
24:42
Stryker
Did you ask?
24:44
Stryker
I grew up my whole life here, going there, birthday parties there, the whole nine, the Universal. And he has banana breath, King Kong, which I like.
24:52
Drew
I remember thinking I was an actor and I'd been on the lots before auditioning. I was like, I'm not going to like the tour. And it was great. I was like a kid. I mean, it was amazing. I had the best time.
25:01
Stryker
It's really good. That's Missi Pyle's voice, by the way.
25:04
Stryker
I'm going to watch this again until they set us up at those parks.
25:06
Stryker
We're done. All right. So how about Drew and Stryker Tram? They'll give me the script. I'll read it and I'll do it for your family. Just your family is on there. OK, we're coming up in the old western town. The doors were small for the men so they would look grander. And then we had bigger doors for the little so they would look smaller. Aha, right?
25:26
Stryker
Whatever.
25:27
Drew
It's really a little bit scary how much you know.
25:31
Stryker
I know more about Not The Tour, though, but we'll get to that. You're up for an MTV Movie Award, which is going on next Saturday, I guess.
25:38
Drew
Yes, I am.
25:39
Stryker
What's the category?
25:43
Drew
Myself and Queen Latifah are nominated for Best Fight.
25:48
Stryker
That sounds like a winner. Just judging the way MTV selects their winners.
25:53
Drew
What?
25:53
Stryker
Us?
25:53
Stryker
We're going to win. So for Best Fight?
25:57
Drew
For Best Fight.
25:57
Stryker
From which movie?
25:59
Drew
Bringing Down the House.
26:00
Stryker
I've seen it and now which character were you in that?
26:03
Drew
I was the one who fought Queen Latifah.
26:05
Stryker
I know, but I don't remember the fight.
26:07
Drew
You don't remember the fight in the bathroom?
26:08
Stryker
I saw the movie like a year ago, a year and a half ago.
26:10
Drew
You don't remember the fight like she and I go in the bathroom and I'm sort of awful.
26:14
Stryker
See, I can remember the tour at Universal and now I can't remember the fight.
26:17
Drew
I know, in every line. It's just, you know, we have this fight in the bathroom and Robert Palmer's Simply Irresistible is playing over at the top and we just beat each other. OK, I do remember now for a very long time.
26:30
Stryker
Really? Was it hard scene? Hard scene of film was a fun?
26:32
Drew
Oh, it was so much fun. She was amazing. I think, you know, she was looking forward to it. It was at the end of the shoot. So we were both looking forward to it. And she even said to me at the end, like, you know, I'll see you at the MTV Movie Awards because we're going to get nominated.
26:45
Stryker
I was like, nice.
26:46
Drew
OK, because if it was me and someone who wasn't Queen Latifah, we probably wouldn't get nominated.
26:51
Stryker
I did her talk show years ago.
26:53
Drew
She's great.
26:54
Stryker
Very nice woman.
26:55
Drew
She's really great.
26:55
Stryker
I like her. Where are we going, Drew?
26:57
Stryker
Sandy's 23.
26:58
Stryker
What's up, Sandy?
26:59
Stryker
My teacher at school said that if you take Prozac, it helps you improve your memory.
27:05
Stryker
Junior college? Well, if you're depressed, it will improve your memory. And a low serotonin level can be associated with impaired memory, probably the result of cell dropout. But it's not the case that a normal person is going to have improved memory necessarily with Prozac.
27:25
Stryker
You're 23 still in junior college. Hold on, let me get to that.
27:28
Stryker
Yeah.
27:29
Stryker
So you just started obviously at an older age or you've been there for six years now?
27:34
Stryker
No, I just started at an older age.
27:36
Stryker
Where are you going to school?
27:37
Stryker
Harvard City College.
27:38
Stryker
Nice. So after two years, you're going to go like USC or UCLA or something? USC. Good football team.
27:46
Stryker
So it won't, like how about in someone older who's just a normal person?
27:52
Stryker
Yeah, in an aging population, there might be some, I've never seen any data on that, but I could see where that might make a difference because there can be low level biological changes like a depressive state that could be associated with memory issues. So yeah, that makes some sense. There's something called pseudo dementia. I think Sandy, your professor is confusing something. Pseudo dementia is a depression. When you correct, people in their 70s and 80s can look demented and it's actually a depressed state. And when you treat their depression, the dementia or the memory problems go away. Oops.
28:22
Stryker
Really?
28:23
Stryker
Yeah.
28:24
Stryker
Tina. Tina, 16 on Loveline. You just cut her off? She's been waiting forever.
28:30
Stryker
Yeah.
28:31
Stryker
Good.
28:31
Stryker
What's up?
28:32
Stryker
Well, I just want to know if masturbating too young is normal.
28:37
Stryker
How old did you start?
28:38
Stryker
I was about six.
28:41
Stryker
Well, that happens sometimes. And, usually, when kids start mucking around with their genitalia at a young age, it's because there's some chaos in the home. You start self-
28:50
Stryker
I was molested. All right.
28:52
Stryker
Well, there you go. That's even worse. I mean, that's not worse. You're a genius, Drew. It's a more overt cause of sexualization of children is their sexual abuse.
28:59
Stryker
Well, I've always been ashamed of it. I never said anything to anybody because, like, my mom caught me a couple of times and she flipped out.
29:08
Stryker
No, listen, you had something happen to you that changed the way your brain is wired. And I'm no doubt now your feelings about your sexuality and the feelings that emerge about sexuality are very, very different. Most people that have been sexually abused will either become hyper or hyposexual. They're very, very sexual or super shut down or fluctuating back and forth between those two states.
29:31
Stryker
She's gone.
29:31
Stryker
Not right here.
29:32
Stryker
Just like that.
29:34
Stryker
This is Chester 22.
29:35
Adam
Hello?
29:36
Stryker
What's up, Chester?
29:37
Adam
Hey, what's going on?
29:39
Stryker
Tell us.
29:41
Stryker
And with you, what's up?
29:44
Stryker
How come nobody is responding right now?
29:46
Stryker
I don't know.
29:47
Stryker
This is a mild day.
29:48
Stryker
This is what Adam yells about every night.
29:50
Stryker
I know.
29:50
Stryker
This seems pretty retarded.
29:52
Stryker
But I'm a norm, not normal. I'm just like, sometimes I can't get mad, but now I'm getting frustrated a little bit.
29:56
Stryker
Chris is cracking up.
29:56
Stryker
Chris is cracking up. Here's Adam. Listen, you idiots, I got a deal with you goddamn people every single night.
30:03
Stryker
It is like, I'll put our colors against any other radio show.
30:07
Stryker
City's 97.
30:08
Stryker
See?
30:09
Stryker
Look at this.
30:10
Stryker
You are?
30:17
Stryker
Who else is down in the group room?
30:20
Stryker
Who?
30:20
Stryker
Tell them to turn it on.
30:23
Stryker
Hey, Chester.
30:24
Stryker
Yeah.
30:26
Stryker
Yeah. Care to ask your question?
30:28
Stryker
You idiots!
30:30
Stryker
Chester?
30:31
Stryker
Yes.
30:31
Stryker
Ask your question, you idiots!
30:34
Stryker
My question?
30:35
Adam
Today, Junior! Sorry. My question is...
30:43
Drew
This is shocking.
30:45
Adam
I've been on Zyprexa for a couple months.
31:04
Stryker
And I over... I don't know when this came on, but for the last couple of months... What's your diagnosis? Are you manic-depressive?
31:12
Adam
Bipolar.
31:12
Stryker
Bipolar. Okay. You might talk to your doctor about Topamax. That can sometimes be a mood-stabilizer. Not a great one, but it will suppress some of the appetite-stimulating effects of Xyprexa. Amanda, 22.
31:22
Stryker
Amanda, save us right here.
31:24
Stryker
Hello?
31:25
Stryker
What's going on?
31:30
Stryker
Hold on.
31:31
Stryker
No, because I was standing outside. I don't want everyone to hear.
31:35
Drew
Well, haven't they been waiting for a long time?
31:37
Stryker
As opposed to Chester, who was screaming to his entire family to go turn the radio on.
31:40
Stryker
I believe he was talking about the group. Right. What's up, Amanda?
31:59
Stryker
I was taken from my parents when I was six years old. Why? They said I had a dirty house. Like my parents kept a dirty house. Literally, that's what was it. I was living in the city of Long Beach then. I was always really, really close to my dad. When they took me, it put me in a state like now. I'm diagnosed manic depressive. I have a boyfriend. He just got out of prison in January.
32:31
Stryker
How old is he?
32:32
Stryker
He's 47.
32:34
Drew
How old are you?
32:35
Stryker
22.
32:36
Stryker
I'm 22.
32:37
Stryker
Beautiful.
32:38
Stryker
And I have a 10-month-old daughter and we've been together for about four months now.
32:43
Stryker
So you're going to see to it that this daughter is taking away from you just the way you were taking away from her. That's what you're working on it, Amanda. That's the road you're heading down.
32:52
Stryker
Really?
32:52
Stryker
Are you going to stay with this 47-year-old guy who just got out of jail? He's the dad, right?
32:58
Stryker
Mm-hmm. But all his kids are grown.
33:02
Drew
Is he the dad or no?
33:04
Stryker
No, he's not the father of the baby now.
33:07
Stryker
Where's the father?
33:09
Stryker
He's off in his own world on Crystal.
33:11
Stryker
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. What can we do for you tonight?
33:15
Stryker
But I was, like, my question being, he has a lot of the same characteristics as my father. And, like, my mom, she just, like, she's opened up more about, like, my father's past, like, before they even, like, got married and stuff. Mm-hmm. And, because she was realizing the, you know, the similarities, there we go, sorry about that, the similarities. And I was, like, I'm wondering, am I leaning more towards his love or this relationship because I'm looking, like, for my dad?
33:52
Stryker
Well, but, Amanda, most people do some version of that. They either explicitly or at least implicitly find somebody that fits with who they are. And who we are is very much built by our primary relationships. And so it's natural that, you know, we sort of fit together with people to remind us of our primary caretakers. And for women, more so than not, it is the dad. And if the dad was a traumatizing relationship, then it becomes a quest. Strangely enough, I don't know why we're wired that way, but if you have a traumatic relationship with your dad, he's abandoning, abusive, or unavailable in ways you needed him, man, that's the kind of guy you're going to look for. That's who you look for, and of course, when you find that kind of guy again, you're going to relive the same thing all over again.
34:32
Drew
Is it because it's just comfortable? It's what you know?
34:35
Stryker
It's much, much more than that. Much more. It's who you are. You are a person that fits with that. And those things that are traumatizing in childhood are converted to attraction in adolescence. It's amazing. All right, let's set up that way.
34:47
Stryker
Let's grab one real quick, and then we got to get some of these calls, everything, medical, medical. We need the wiener falling off questions. John, what's up? You're 26.
34:58
Stryker
First of all, I got to tell Drew, I loved your book.
35:01
Stryker
Oh, thanks.
35:02
Stryker
You guys helped me graduate from college with the bachelors. And so my question is, I've been using probably about 30 to 40 Norcos a day for quite a while, the yellow ones with the less aspirin.
35:15
Stryker
Yeah.
35:16
Stryker
And I know that's not the thing to do, but I hate 12-step. I've been there for, you know, court and for other incidences, and I was just curious if you had any possible alternatives that are realistic that could, you know, help me kick it.
35:29
Stryker
There's SOS, starting over sober, and there are sort of, I'm blanking on the name of this other group. There are a couple other groups around that are non-12-step based. They basically take you through the same thing. Look, all 12-step is, is you having a relationship. That's all it is. It's you being trusting of other people, sitting down with a person, your sponsor, and rebuilding relationships with that person in the context of understanding that you don't need to control everything. That's where the whole higher power thing comes from. You got to give it up, give up the control, trust that things will be okay, and then establish that relationship and dig into your feelings in a structured way. That is all really 12-step is. And they're very rational recovery. That's the other group. So SOS, rational recovery. And, but these all are basically, if you don't have a very, very intimate relationship, you're not going to rewire the brain the way you need to, to deal with this disease, period. Now you can become chronically ill. You can say, and this is a lot of people that advocate this that say, well, you know, the recidivism, the success rate is so low with coming up drugs like Norco. Let's just put them on methadone and call it a life. And you can do that. You can, some people would say that'd be the way to do it. I personally think that's a onerous way to go.
36:46
Stryker
Yeah, I would like to get away as clean as I can, but what's the fundamental difference in the framework compared to the 12-step with the other?
36:54
Stryker
They will say that what's different is that there is no spiritual component. But I got to tell you that, and I don't really fully understand what that spiritual element is, and I think it's different for each person, but every person I've ever met who actually had sustained recovery described whatever they consider to be their spiritual element, that's the most important part of their recovery. Carl Jung felt the same way.
37:15
Stryker
That's your favorite question of the night, recovery.
37:16
Stryker
Yes.
37:17
Stryker
Because you're the specialist. All right, we're going to take a break. Missi Pyle is here, Soul Plane, Dodgeball, MTV Movie Awards, and we're going to actually you and I will get words in in a minute. All right, we're back here on Loveline. Happy Memorial Day Weekend, everyone. I'm Stryker, in for Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew, and Missi Pyle is here, who is getting up in about five hours to go do more work for Dodgeball. Are you a morning person, or do you like to go to bed late, wake up late?
38:03
Drew
I wake up every morning with the crack of dawn. No, I am.
38:05
Stryker
No, you don't.
38:06
Drew
I don't. I go to bed late and get up pretty late.
38:10
Stryker
Is it getting wet? Hello? What'd you say?
38:13
Drew
I go to bed late and get up pretty late.
38:14
Stryker
What did you think I said?
38:16
Stryker
I thought you said something dirty. Well. Hello. Yes, yes, yes.
38:19
Stryker
I get up late.
38:20
Stryker
What's up, Dr. Drew?
38:21
Stryker
I'm a new man right now, all of a sudden. Do you notice? I'm a new man.
38:24
Stryker
You keep touching me.
38:25
Stryker
Dr. Drew and I just had a meeting. I'm a new man. Oh my goodness. What are you gonna wear to the award show, by the way? I wanna act like Joan Rivers. Have you picked out a costume yet for the MTV Movie Awards?
38:35
Drew
I have not yet. I am working on that with a friend of mine. Right.
38:39
Stryker
A costume, did you call it?
38:40
Stryker
That's right.
38:42
Drew
Frilly costume of some sort.
38:44
Stryker
And have you thought about what you and Queen Latifah will do when you win?
38:49
Drew
When we win and we get on stage.
38:51
Stryker
Are you gonna wrestle? Are you gonna make out like she did with Adrienne Brody?
38:54
Drew
I have, yes and yes. Yeah. And I have been writing my acceptance speech as every good actor does since I was about six. Of course. So, I'm very excited. It's funny because I think realistically, getting an Academy Award or an Emmy, which you kind of have that speech in the back of your head at some point. So when I got nominated for this award, I was kind of like, it's almost as good.
39:15
Stryker
It is. You know, it's kind of better because it's more like, it's not the, it's such the non-stuck up crowd that is voting for it and choosing what's great. And I actually don't think the Academy Awards have a category for best fight on screen. Do they?
39:28
Drew
Right, right.
39:29
Stryker
Well, no.
39:29
Stryker
I'm just kidding, of course. You think I was serious, Drew?
39:32
Stryker
For a second there.
39:32
Stryker
No, you didn't.
39:33
Stryker
You did? For a second there.
39:35
Stryker
Drew, you know me.
39:36
Stryker
Let's talk to Francesca.
39:36
Stryker
Fine. 19, Francesca, what's going on?
39:40
Stryker
Hi, I have this problem, okay, I was dating this guy, and I dated him off and on for like six to eight months, and we broke up a little over a month ago, and now he's dating my best friend.
39:55
Stryker
How old is he?
39:58
Stryker
He's 19 as well.
40:00
Stryker
That's not cool.
40:01
Stryker
Yeah.
40:01
Stryker
That's not cool of him, but more especially, your best friend.
40:04
Stryker
Well, yeah.
40:05
Drew
Is she still your best friend?
40:06
Stryker
No. What's that? As soon as I found out what was going on, I was like, you know what, screw you.
40:13
Stryker
Well, that's not necessarily a bad position to take. She's kind of showing herself to not really care much about your feelings.
40:20
Stryker
Yeah, but what hurts the most about it is that I've known this girl since like I was three. So we've known each other for like 17 years.
40:27
Stryker
Yeah. That doesn't mean that she's not who she seems to be. It's the fact that you've known her all that time, doesn't, I'm sure it's tough now to come to terms with who she's become. You know, you've sort of become, when you grow up with somebody, you have your own sort of sense of who they are and that may not be real.
40:41
Drew
The older I get, you know, the more I look at, you choose your friends as you get older and you change. And from three to 19, you're a totally different person.
40:50
Stryker
It's true that you share something unique when you grow up with somebody and that you'll always be bonded by that unique experience together. But the reality is the reason she was your best friend because she sat across from you in kindergarten.
41:00
Stryker
Yeah.
41:01
Stryker
You know what I mean? It's more proximity when you don't have a car and you can't get around.
41:04
Stryker
Right.
41:04
Stryker
She just was somebody who was there. And in real life, now that you're an adult, you would not, probably not choose, well, certainly now would not choose her as a best friend.
41:11
Stryker
So now do you want to ask them, stop dating? Do you want to tell them to stop?
41:17
Stryker
In a way, yes. But in a way, I just, I'm not sure.
41:21
Stryker
Why don't you just say, F it, move on. She's not your best friend. She's dating the guy you were dating.
41:27
Stryker
You should count your blessings that both these people are out of your life now. It's painful when people are something different than you thought they were because you care about them very much, but this is who they are. Move on. Good job.
41:41
Stryker
Lucy.
41:42
Stryker
Where's Lucy?
41:42
Stryker
Number three, you're 18, Lucy. What's up?
41:45
Stryker
Oh, hello?
41:46
Stryker
Hello.
41:46
Stryker
Hi, I'm actually having sex with my ex-boyfriend again. And I'm in the relationship right now. And I don't know whether to tell them or...
42:01
Stryker
Tell your boy, your current boyfriend?
42:02
Stryker
Yeah, my current boyfriend.
42:04
Stryker
Well, you're...
42:05
Stryker
Why do you have this boyfriend if you're sleeping with the ex-boyfriend?
42:08
Stryker
Missi, what's she up to? Help us. This is a...
42:10
Drew
Are you sleeping with both of them?
42:12
Stryker
Yeah, I am. I don't know, I guess I feel kind of bad if I leave my current boyfriend.
42:19
Stryker
How are you? Yeah.
42:20
Stryker
Because my ex-boyfriend has a girlfriend too and we just keep coming back to each other. And I don't know whether...
42:26
Drew
Well, I think maybe you should think about that. Like if you keep coming back, then maybe you're supposed to be with that person or...
42:34
Stryker
Here's what keeps coming back means. It's just she offers himself to him and he's of course an idiot and he's an ass and takes her up on it.
42:40
Drew
Is that what happens? Is that what you do?
42:43
Stryker
I mean, we just, we see each other and when we see each other, it's like... It's like we get this vibe that we wanna be with each other and we do get with each other.
42:54
Stryker
We'll go on a Burger King and then we're gonna go have sex.
42:56
Stryker
The vibe is that guy will have sex with you if you let him. That's the vibe.
43:01
Stryker
Cause he's an 18 year old guy probably, or 19, 20, right? And well, no, just a guy in general would do it. I can vouch for that.
43:07
Stryker
Well, he was certainly 19 year old, well. Who knows what he's thinking?
43:11
Stryker
Well, what should I do with my current boyfriend?
43:13
Stryker
Well, I think you're not being fair to him. You may wanna end that just cause it doesn't seem to mean that much to you. And then whatever you do with your ex-boyfriend, I'm sure this guy is a colossal idiot. But if you wanna stick around with that guy, that's fine. Whatever it is, the scarier, less available, more chaotic guy is the one you want, right?
43:33
Stryker
Well, not really, but I mean, I think I'm at a phase where I'm like, my bad boy phase.
43:39
Stryker
Yeah, well, guess what, enjoy it because you're gonna go, Missi, help her out with that. How can she shorten that phase?
43:48
Drew
Don't go out with that guy anymore. I mean, you know, it's one of those things where you, I think you just want to do something that isn't, you know it's not good, it's like drinking too much. It's like anything that you do because you, you know.
44:03
Stryker
Well, I guess it's because he lasts longer. I don't know whether.
44:06
Stryker
Oh yeah, that's the whole reason. The sex is better. The sex is better.
44:10
Stryker
Is the sex better or he lasts longer?
44:12
Stryker
The sex is better because he's a bad guy. That's why it's better. So you're experiencing it psychologically more completely. Even you can connect with parts of yourself that you think are bad, too.
44:20
Drew
I think, yeah, I also think like there's a guy that you sort of want to go out with because he feels like the right person. He feels good for you. And then there's the guy that you really want, which is the one who's generally not good for you and who, you know, you're more yourself around, but you always want to be something better than you are.
44:37
Stryker
Yeah.
44:40
Stryker
All right, Lucy, we're going in circles now. Just try to be fair to the current boyfriend. And if you dump them, go start.
44:48
Stryker
I want to explore that a little more. But that, why can't you be yourself around a guy, including some things unsavory about yourself, around a guy that's not a despicable, I want to use a bad word, despicable guy. Why do you have to have, you're interested with a despicable guy in order to be bad with a despicable guy?
45:08
Drew
Well, I just think that a lot of people, women in particular, you know, you have certain things about yourself that you don't like. That's who you are, but you want, you know, when you meet somebody for the first time, when you're in a new relationship, you show that person what you want them to see.
45:24
Stryker
Right.
45:24
Drew
And I think that that's just, that's just the person that you necessarily want to be.
45:28
Stryker
But a lot of women then hide the rest of themselves.
45:31
Drew
That will always come out, I mean.
45:33
Stryker
But a lot of women act it out with the bad guys.
45:37
Drew
Right.
45:37
Stryker
And never really show their complete, who they completely, who they are to the guy that's available for a relationship.
45:43
Drew
I'm not entirely sure why that is, I mean, I think that there's, that the guy that you feel is bad for you is someone that you sort of associate with yourself. Like the low self-esteem that you may have or just certain things that you don't like about yourself. So you associate and you're more comfortable with that person, it's sort of like, and then you see someone that you sort of aspire to be with, someone who's better than that. And for some reason, I think a lot of women don't allow themselves to be totally honest with those people. And I'm not entirely sure why that is.
46:18
Stryker
Stryker, correct me if I'm wrong, but those guys that somebody like Missi would aspire to be, would be happy with all aspects. You know what I mean? You don't think so?
46:28
Stryker
I don't know.
46:29
Stryker
Really? Yeah.
46:29
Stryker
That's something I don't think so. I think hiding your, trying to be someone you're not to impress your new person.
46:39
Stryker
Is a mistake.
46:40
Stryker
Is a mistake, but it's a mistake. It's impossible not to do.
46:43
Stryker
We will pick up this discussion after the break.
46:45
Stryker
Isn't it? It is.
46:47
Stryker
We're late for break.
46:48
Stryker
Are we? All right, Anderson, cut me off again. Nuts, Red Knot, we'll be back. More Loveline after this.
46:53
Stryker
Alright guys, here's the deal. You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?
46:58
Stryker
One call is all you need to make.
47:00
Stryker
Call the Dateline. 877-889-DATE.
47:03
Stryker
Call the Dateline.
47:14
Stryker
This hour brought to you in part by Axe.
47:16
Stryker
Experience the Axe Effect.
47:42
Stryker
If you're in LA next Saturday, Franz Ferdinand is playing out here. That was the beat right in the background.
47:48
Stryker
Yes, yes, yes.
47:49
Stryker
Have you heard this song? We gotta get Franz Ferdinand in here. But when I'm here, when Adam's gone. What's that?
47:59
Drew
It sounds fantastic.
48:00
Stryker
Shut up, you're lying to me now.
48:02
Drew
I'm not.
48:02
Stryker
You're lying, and I'm afraid, I'm afraid now, because now I know I have to supply a nice house, and the woman has to keep the nice house from what we set off the air.
48:09
Drew
Yes, you need to supply.
48:10
Stryker
I need to supply.
48:11
Stryker
Huge discussion off the air.
48:12
Stryker
Yeah, I sat here and listened like a ping pong match back and forth, and I was like, I don't know, I think I'm too tunnel vision with my little group.
48:19
Stryker
Really?
48:19
Stryker
Yeah, girls wear the little baseball hats and sweats, and don't get too made up unless we're going out.
48:24
Stryker
That's another kind of ruse.
48:27
Stryker
It is?
48:28
Stryker
Right? Yeah.
48:29
Stryker
What, what do you mean? Oh, because they're trying to show that they don't care.
48:33
Stryker
I was gonna say it in the other way.
48:34
Stryker
Bingo, yeah, that's it, Drew. Because, you know, if you look like a bum, you can look hot as hell.
48:40
Drew
Oh, totally.
48:40
Stryker
If you look really fancy, you can look hot. But if you're in between, no one's gonna care. Do you think?
48:47
Drew
I think.
48:49
Stryker
Here we go, go to calls.
48:50
Stryker
We are? Where are we going? By the way, that's Missi Pyle. She's here, she's on a lot of movies. She hangs out with cool people. She likes coffee. She has a black jacket on, blonde hair, soul plane, dodge ball, a true underdog story. What's that? I want to describe who I'm sitting next to, two feet away. This is very nice. Okay, that's a good movie too. Justin.
49:15
Stryker
Yeah.
49:15
Stryker
You're 20 on Loveline.
49:16
Stryker
Yeah.
49:18
Stryker
Dr. Drew, you're a man of extreme passion and been a long time listener and I'm really excited to be on the air with you guys.
49:25
Stryker
Fantastic. Adam's not here tonight, it's Stryker and Fred.
49:27
Stryker
Yeah, I know that. I mean, Stryker, you're cool too.
49:30
Stryker
Yeah, I'm not that cool. But because of the Loveline show, because I work right next door to the studio, I got to be on the Sharon Osbourne show, who was your guest. She met me and then we went on.
49:40
Stryker
That's right.
49:40
Stryker
Which was good. Anyway, Justin, go ahead and ask Dr. Drew about his passion.
49:44
Stryker
Yeah, my question is, I've been dating this girl for like two and a half months and tonight was the second time that we've tried to have sex and it's like, she's really tight and I just can't get it in her. And I was like wondering if there was anything I could do to like help that.
49:57
Stryker
Astro Glide.
49:58
Stryker
How old is she?
49:59
Stryker
She's 18.
50:01
Stryker
18, a little young. Is she nervous about all this?
50:04
Stryker
I asked her if she wasn't.
50:05
Stryker
She said that she wasn't nervous because we've tried it before and she seems to be into it. So I really don't know what the problem was.
50:12
Stryker
Is she lubricating normally?
50:13
Stryker
Yeah, she was wet.
50:15
Stryker
And is there an anatomical problem? I mean, is there something about you we need to know?
50:19
Stryker
Are you giant?
50:20
Stryker
No, not at all.
50:22
Stryker
No.
50:24
Stryker
At least you're honest, man. That's good.
50:25
Stryker
Well, then what you've got there is a spasm of the muscles in the pelvic floor, basically. And it's either cause...
50:32
Stryker
Yeah, because I could get the tip in, but I couldn't get all the way in.
50:35
Stryker
What hurts her, right?
50:36
Stryker
We're aware the tip is in, Justin.
50:38
Stryker
It's basically called vaginismus, which is...
50:40
Stryker
She's probably nervous.
50:41
Stryker
It's usually cause... There is actually a pelvic spinal reflex that can cause it too. But the first time out, nervous, no doubt.
50:47
Drew
So was she a virgin before?
50:50
Stryker
Yeah, so that's not an uncommon thing. You gotta kind of... There actually are ways of treating this, so people have it chronically, where they have to have graduated cylinders and things like that. It's a Kama Sutra. No. No, it's acrylic cylinders.
51:01
Drew
Kama Sutra, acrylic cylinders.
51:03
Stryker
That's right, yeah. And in the meantime, just take it slow and easy, whether you're very patient, this thing is probably something that...
51:08
Stryker
Seriously, but there is the best product ever that I would like to endorse, and I'm serious, and I think you should go get it. You can get it at any Walmart, not Walmart, but the Long's Drugs, Astroglide. Astroglide. It is so good, and it washes off with water, no soap. You're done, and it's the best. Astroglide. Yes, Astroglide. Slippery when wet.
51:25
Stryker
Maria 25. We're too enthusiastic and endorsement there, Stryker.
51:29
Stryker
It's so good, though.
51:30
Drew
I get that.
51:31
Stryker
Have you used it before?
51:32
Stryker
You don't have to answer that. You can wink once if you have.
51:35
Drew
Let's talk to Maria.
51:35
Stryker
Maria 25.
51:36
Stryker
Maria, Maria, what's up?
51:38
Yes, yes, yes. Finally, thank God. My boyfriend won't marry me because he believes he has a sleeping disorder.
51:46
Stryker
He won't marry you because of a sleeping disorder?
51:48
Drew
Yes.
51:49
Stryker
Why doesn't he have his, no, I can't.
51:52
Drew
Sounds a bit like an excuse to me.
51:53
Stryker
Sounds spurious, yeah. Well, why doesn't he have his sleep disorder treated?
51:58
I, that's the same thing because he believes, I'm sure he's listening to you right now, so hopefully you will be able to tell him, Dr. Drew, that he needs to go to a clinic and-
52:07
Stryker
Does he snore real loud or something? What's the problem?
52:10
What was that?
52:11
Stryker
Does he snore real loud? What's the problem?
52:13
No, he doesn't snore. He just goes to sleep, but he doesn't feel rested.
52:17
Stryker
What?
52:17
What? Yes, I don't know. He just has fatigue, a lot of fatigue. He's always tired. He's always sleepy. And-
52:24
Stryker
Is he overweight?
52:27
No, actually, no. No, he's not. He was perfectly great in the back in 98 when I met him, actually in 97. And all of a sudden, he just changed. He believed he cured himself from schizophrenia, which I don't think that he never had. He had a nervous breakdown, according to him, and he never went to a clinic.
52:46
Stryker
Uh-oh, is he doing drugs? Is he doing drugs?
52:53
Stryker
Except for his schizophrenia and sleep disorder and fatigue.
52:56
Stryker
Yeah, Maria, there's much missing in this story. Fatigue is a very sort of non-specific symptom. It doesn't necessarily mean a sleep disorder. Some of you, it's not a way that doesn't snore, that doesn't have a restless leg, it doesn't have night terrors, that sort of thing. It's hard to make a case for a sleep disorder, and yet he has this strange mental status change at one time, and he thought he was schizophrenic, but never was evaluated. I mean, for God's sakes, he could have a brain tumor, for all we know here, could be a seizure disorder, could be a thousand different things. He needs to go be evaluated medically at a clinic, first and foremost. Secondly, none of this has anything to do with marrying or not marrying, except that he may not be of his right mind.
53:31
Drew
And maybe you don't want to marry him.
53:34
Stryker
Maybe he's too schizo... Maria?
53:37
Stryker
Hold on.
53:37
Stryker
Are you still there, Maria? Now, if you've been going out with them this long, you probably sleep in the same bed every night right now, don't you?
53:44
No. Actually, I live in Fresno and he lives in Los Angeles and it's just something... I see him every other weekend or every weekend and he doesn't sleep great. I see him moving around, but it's just something... I mean, everything is great except for the sleeping thing and he doesn't think that he will be able to concentrate really on me because of that.
54:08
Stryker
Well, that's... Let's put it this way. That is total, absolute, categorical BS. And whatever is going on with him, it's not that. But something is up with him. And again, restlessness at night, if it's leg restlessness, limb restlessness, that's easily treated. But I'm not sure that's what...
54:23
Stryker
Let's go to Kelly. 16. What's up, Kelly?
54:30
Stryker
I heard another girl, she said she started masturbating when she was six and I was nine. And I was actually with another guy while I was doing it, like, we do it together.
54:41
Stryker
Who do it with?
54:44
Stryker
My friend who's like the same age. A girl? No, a guy.
54:49
Stryker
And we also were talking about her sexual abuse, that girl that...
54:53
Stryker
Your voice sounds really young, like 12-ish, 13.
54:57
Stryker
No, it wasn't abuse, it was like together, like, just like boyfriend-girlfriend but not like...
55:07
Stryker
Oh, but you were nine?
55:12
Stryker
But there was sexual touching? Yeah, that's a form of sex and that's kind of traumatic for young child. To be sexualized at a young age can change your trajectory of development. And in your case, it's making you...
55:25
Stryker
And basically, you're either going to go one way, crazy sex, dildo sex, or just not do anything.
55:31
Stryker
Or go back and forth. That's why we call it bipolar condition, right? So what's the question?
55:36
Stryker
So, I was wondering how old you have to be to buy a dildo at 16?
55:40
Stryker
Actually, you have to be 18 and they sell them over at 5283 Venice Boulevard.
55:45
Stryker
You have to be 18?
55:46
Stryker
No, I don't know. I don't know how old you have to be.
55:48
Drew
You can probably get one on the internet. Do you have a credit card?
55:50
Stryker
I would think so.
55:51
Stryker
Or just like when I was 16, I would go to the 7-Eleven and I would have people buy me beer. Maybe you can do that in front of the sex stores.
55:58
Drew
Maybe.
55:59
Stryker
Hey, sir, can you please buy me the Big Dildo? And you can get it that way. Drew?
56:06
Stryker
I'm just afraid of what that guy might do to her. Yeah. Do you know what that's sort of...
56:10
Drew
The guy who's standing outside the sex store.
56:12
Stryker
The stranger outside the sex store that you have to buy the Big Dildo.
56:15
Stryker
Haven't you been in... have you ever been in one of those?
56:17
Stryker
The stores? Yeah.
56:20
Stryker
Yes. That's why you're pausing.
56:22
Stryker
I was thinking probably when I was in college or high school. I haven't in years and years and years.
56:27
Drew
The Hustler store. I mean, that's like a candy store.
56:30
Stryker
Oh, by the way, yeah.
56:31
Stryker
Go to the Hustler store in Sunset. They have them there, I think. I know they have handcuffs that are furry, which I got there one time.
56:37
Drew
There you go. From Los Angeles.
56:38
Stryker
No, Berkeley. Even better, Cisco.
56:41
Drew
They have a nice grassroots dildo store.
56:44
Stryker
It's probably made out of hemp. All right, Wendy, you're 20.
56:48
Stryker
Hey, my question is, my parents were never around when I was growing up. My sisters and my brothers raised me, and my dad's ill now, and my mom lives in Georgia. She called me every once in a while wanting to talk, I guess wanting to become closer to me, and I don't care about them. I do VR on my parents, and I love them for that, but there isn't a genuine caring. I want to be part of their lives. I want them to be around things like that, and I feel bad for it, but I don't. And I feel really selfish for that, but how could I? They weren't around, so it's just, I know it's like, you know, I don't think you're right.
57:33
Stryker
Yeah, first of all, you're feeling selfish. I think you're entitled to that, given that nothing can be more selfish than parents who aren't able to give of themselves in such a way as to raise their child, their basic obligation in life. They fail. You have every right to feel, to be a little selfish as it pertains to them, and you have every right not to trust their availability and trust the relationship, because unless they've had a lot of treatment or changed them in a dramatic way, they're not likely to be people that you should be trusting.
58:00
Stryker
They don't even like think, I mean, they don't even apologize for it. They just think it's like, well, it was a circumstance and this happened and that happened, but I'm like, okay.
58:11
Stryker
They were a lot less substantial people than yourself. They couldn't live up to their basic lives responsibilities. They're not, they're not who you want them to be. They're not who they should have been.
58:23
Stryker
Exactly.
58:24
Stryker
That's never going to change. That is imprinted in you. Now, the people who they were is stuck in your head. Now, if you want to try to have a relationship as an adult with people that are sort of in your family, but don't really deserve much more from you than they gave you.
58:39
Stryker
Why are they trying to do this now, Wendy?
58:40
Stryker
Well, my dad's sick. He's like, he has like some arthritis problem or something. And he almost passed like a few months ago and I just, I don't know, like my siblings like asked me for help, like to help my dad out and like, like he doesn't work. He's disabled. To help out money-wise and I'm like 20 trying to make it on my own here and I, like, I get like angry. Like how could they expect that from me?
59:06
Stryker
Like, but I think it's a healthy, it's a healthy response. Now, if you also want to help out, that's fine. But to be angry for the outrageousness that they would.
59:14
Drew
We'll say they're coming back now for money.
59:16
Stryker
They're all like 30 years old.
59:18
Stryker
They're like all well, doing good. I mean, everyone struggles, but like for the most part, they're doing good. They have families now and I'm like trying to like get a career going here, like trying to just like separate myself and be my own person, you know, and it's just like, I'm like stuck. Like I know what I want, but then I, I mean, I have feelings. I'm not a bad person, but I feel bad for it. And also.
59:40
Stryker
Feel bad for what? Exactly what? What do you feel bad for?
59:43
Stryker
For just not caring.
59:45
Stryker
It's just not caring.
59:46
Stryker
I wouldn't feel bad.
59:47
Stryker
No, you've got, you've got to decide, determine, you know, what is, and is not right and wrong for you. And if it's important to you to, in terms of feeling good about yourself, as I doubt it, that you have to contribute in some way, then do, but there's no sort of.
1:00:00
Stryker
Don't feel bad.
1:00:01
Drew
You get to make your own decisions now. I mean, you're an adult. You don't have to.
1:00:04
Stryker
Thank God you're as good as you are.
1:00:07
Stryker
Thank you. I hear that from people and I'm just like, sometimes I'm like, well, it's just how it happened. But thanks. I appreciate it. And also, it's hard for me to like have relationships with people.
1:00:21
Stryker
This is the legacy.
1:00:22
Stryker
And I know it's because of that.
1:00:23
Stryker
Right. This is the legacy they've left you with.
1:00:25
Stryker
Thanks.
1:00:26
Stryker
That's the part you've got to overcome. It's important to be a healthy, happy person in life. It's important to have close relationships. Work and relationships, work and love are the key. You need both. It sounds like you got the work part, you're getting together, but you need to be able to have the relationship part. It's going to be tough to be available, to trust people, to follow through, but you're going to have to take yourself by the hand and just do that. Just get in some relationship with people you think you can trust, but be careful. You're going to be kind of attracted to people that are abandoning and not available. Go for the guys that are not so exciting and attractive to you.
1:00:57
Stryker
That's impossible now.
1:00:58
Stryker
We'll see now.
1:00:59
Drew
That's what we were talking about before. You're going for someone who's not exciting.
1:01:05
Stryker
You can go for somebody that's attractive but not exciting, not super attracted to. You can do that. Listen, a friend of mine, a psychiatrist once said, he goes, look, you can have a chaotic, rich, exciting relationship and live miserably or you can have a quiet life with somebody that's not quite as exciting and be happy.
1:01:22
Stryker
Now what if you're chaotic? Do you go after a chaotic person?
1:01:25
Stryker
Generally.
1:01:26
Stryker
Because, but what if your parents are not like that?
1:01:29
Stryker
What do you mean?
1:01:30
Stryker
Meaning, say my dad was ridiculously crazy, possibly alcoholic. He's not, by the way, if you're listening, dad, I know you're not. I may go for somebody like that as a, right. Now, but if he's a normal guy and say I'm super chaotic, what am I going to go after? What am I going to seek out, do you think?
1:01:48
Stryker
You're going to seek out something similar to what your relationships were like, whatever traumatized you that, now if you're, if you are, if you weren't traumatized, then you might have a broader range of experiences and choices. Anthony. Where's Anthony?
1:02:00
Stryker
Number one, you're 20 on Loveline. What's up, man?
1:02:05
Adam
Am I on right now?
1:02:06
Stryker
You're on.
1:02:07
Adam
Yeah. Well, lately, I can last like a year. I've been downloading like a bunch of like cartoon porn, not just like American cartoon porn. I'm like Japanese anime, donjon, mangas, everything. My friends kind of clowned me about it, like way, way too much.
1:02:31
Stryker
This is stuff that you're seeing online?
1:02:34
Adam
Oh, yes. Yes.
1:02:35
Stryker
Is it free?
1:02:36
Adam
Yes. Yes. Well, some sites aren't, but you got to look around.
1:02:40
Stryker
Are you masturbating to it?
1:02:42
Adam
Yes, all the time.
1:02:43
Stryker
All the time. How many times a day?
1:02:45
Adam
I say like three or four.
1:02:47
Stryker
Are you thinking about it when you're not at home?
1:02:49
Adam
Yeah.
1:02:50
Stryker
Like it was your thing, like you're out, you want to get back and check it out?
1:02:53
Adam
Well, sometimes depending on what I'm doing.
1:02:55
Stryker
So this is basically online porn addiction.
1:02:58
Adam
Yeah.
1:02:58
Stryker
But it's Japanese animation porn.
1:03:00
Adam
Yeah.
1:03:00
Stryker
Whatever. It's still the same thing. It's somebody who's has a crack pipe in their office basically. And you know, this is a growing problem, Anthony. Were you sexually abused as a child? No. Physically abused? What was that?
1:03:16
Adam
I don't know if this has been noted, but I did like, I have, I did start like, such reactive early.
1:03:24
Stryker
How old?
1:03:25
Adam
I was like, maybe 10.
1:03:27
Stryker
Okay. That's sexual abuse, Anthony.
1:03:30
Adam
Well, like, within my own age, though.
1:03:32
Stryker
That's sexual abuse. That's child, unchild, sexual abuse. And whoever the child was that did that with you was sexually abused by an adult. That's what sexualizes them and makes them interested in every sex with people their own age. It's not a normal impulse for a kid that age. So sexual abuse history with any kind of addictive biological genetic background is a recipe for sexual addiction. I heard Bill Clinton's going to come out with his book next week and talk about his sexual addiction. Really? Much to my amazement. He's finally going to come out with it.
1:04:01
Stryker
You had said so long ago, right? You said that you thought he was a sex addict.
1:04:04
Stryker
Not thought.
1:04:05
Stryker
You're right.
1:04:05
Stryker
He had a recipe. His life was a recipe for sexual addiction. There was no way he couldn't be.
1:04:11
Stryker
Because of what? Why?
1:04:12
Stryker
He was horrible. His mom was a morphine addict. He had a horrible, traumatic childhood. His father beat the crap out of them. The step dads were abused. He was having to get between the mom and the step dads. Horribly traumatizing.
1:04:23
Stryker
So there's a great chance Anthony could be president.
1:04:27
Stryker
That's right. We seem to have a penchant for that right now.
1:04:29
Drew
Can we talk for just one second about that Japanese anime that is so violent towards women?
1:04:37
Stryker
I've never seen it.
1:04:37
Stryker
I've never seen it.
1:04:38
Drew
I was at a bar in New York and they were just flashing it on the wall and I just couldn't believe it. I mean, there's these women having sex and then them like cutting the women. I mean, it's just horrible.
1:04:48
Stryker
I think Kill Bill is sort of a version of that, I think.
1:04:51
Stryker
You've seen Kill Bill?
1:04:52
Stryker
I just saw it this weekend.
1:04:53
Stryker
Part two?
1:04:55
Drew
Part one, I've not seen any anime, but what you're describing is so much more sexual and it really is really disturbing. And it was just an abnormal bar and it was just playing on the wall and I just couldn't believe it. You'll have to see it. I mean, it's...
1:05:12
Stryker
No, thanks.
1:05:13
Drew
I have to get them.
1:05:13
Stryker
Well, Anthony, go to Florida and hang out with them. Drew, what should Anthony do then to keep this porn from...
1:05:20
Stryker
Buddy, I think all of this ultimately is a bid for what we call affect regulation. I've tried to regulate your feeling states that you can't regulate because of what happened to you. It's sort of affected the trajectory of your evolution as an emotional person. And there are therapists that specialize in this. There's SA, sexual addiction treatment. Twelve Step is useful for this. But you might want to look into people that I don't know of any names or facilities right off hand that are in Florida. I know there's many around that treat specifically with sexual addiction. Online sexual addiction is considered to be one of the fastest growing disorders right now in this country. Something like 300,000 new cases a year or something like that.
1:05:57
Stryker
I don't think, I mean I've seen pictures on the internet, but I never even owned a computer. So I wouldn't even know how to find the movies, to be honest, seriously. But I got a nice collection on DVD, which is fun.
1:06:08
Stryker
Is that of anime or just whatever?
1:06:09
Stryker
No, I don't even watch normal cartoons. Where are you going?
1:06:13
Stryker
Lauren.
1:06:14
Stryker
What's up, Lauren?
1:06:16
Stryker
Go ahead.
1:06:17
Stryker
Yeah. My friend wants to give me anal and I don't know if I should.
1:06:23
Stryker
Is that a boy or girl, your friend?
1:06:24
Stryker
Boy.
1:06:25
Stryker
Yeah, 14 year old.
1:06:27
Stryker
14 year old. You're 14?
1:06:28
Stryker
Have you had vaginal sex? Have you had sex before?
1:06:41
Stryker
No.
1:06:41
Stryker
So why would you even want to jump in as soon as you get pregnant? Because you're pregnant. What's going on? What happened to you when you were a kid?
1:07:01
Stryker
How old were you? That's pedophile night.
1:07:07
Stryker
Love line. This is...
1:07:08
Stryker
And angel night, too.
1:07:09
Stryker
Well, Lauren, that's why you're even contemplating this. Please contain that part of yourself that creates these impulses. It's just... I'd say one of the things that being a victim at seven does is set you up to be a victim in teenager years. Someone who has been... who is raped in their teens very frequently has a sexual abuse history in childhood. It indoctrinates into that freeze response, and so victimizers know you're a good target for them. Put this away. Go get some treatment, Lauren. Do something with this because it's a horrible impulse.
1:07:38
Drew
Is there a book that you can read?
1:07:40
Stryker
How not to have anal sex? How to deal with my childhood sexual abuse?
1:07:44
Drew
Astro Glide.
1:07:45
Stryker
Yeah, Stryker. Astro Glide seems to be Stryker's solution for any and all ill. But be that as it may, no, it's no simple solution. These are very, very difficult problems to treat. She needs to...
1:07:56
Stryker
At 14, where should she go?
1:07:58
Stryker
Just draw yourself on the mercy of local mental health services. There are groups available. You can go to... again, it's so difficult to find. We have a nation right now that is so woefully... Their needs are so woefully taken care of.
1:08:12
Stryker
Just think, why would you want the first time to be anal?
1:08:16
Stryker
Because the first time was when she was 7. And it etched something into her brain that she can't get out. And it's very sad. And she's got now an impulse. She doesn't... She has no boundaries against these things.
1:08:27
Drew
As a woman, I can say you definitely don't want the first time to be anal.
1:08:32
Stryker
Or 14. Or the 20th time, probably.
1:08:36
Drew
I don't want to get into it.
1:08:39
Stryker
Right.
1:08:40
Drew
Yeah.
1:08:41
Stryker
We can get into it in four minutes.
1:08:43
Stryker
Lauren, maybe if you have any counselors at school or you have a doctor, talk to them about your abuse and about what your impulses are now. And see if you can get... There's one thing, I'll tell you something we never talk about in this show, but that people can often... About half the kids that come out of horrible situations in childhood turn out okay. And they can have relationships and get stable jobs and not have mental health problems. And they have found in that population what seems to create that flexibility is a single positive relationship outside of the home with an adult sustained over time, meaning for years as you grow up. So find that relationship with a girl. Nobody you're attracted to. Somebody you find boring, but somebody who cares about you and appreciates what you've been through.
1:09:21
Stryker
I think that should be your next movie script. We're going to take a break. Missi Pyle is here and more Loveline after this.
1:09:33
Stryker
1-800-LOVE-191.
1:09:34
Stryker
Love Line will be right back.
1:09:36
Stryker
Hey Adam, you know how guys have trouble with confidence?
1:09:43
Stryker
That's what you're listening to. I'm Stryker, in for Adam and Dr. Drew is here and Missi Pyle is here also. She's been in a bunch of movies. I just found out or read, I did read. You do stand up.
1:09:53
Drew
I do stand up.
1:09:54
Stryker
Often, was that your main?
1:09:57
Drew
Thank you.
1:09:58
Stryker
Was that what got you recognized to get in these comedic movies?
1:10:03
Drew
I didn't. I was doing film and then I did this movie, Galaxy Quest and I think kind of right after that I started doing stand up.
1:10:10
Stryker
Galaxy Quest. That was a Tim Allen movie, I think.
1:10:13
Drew
It was Tim Allen and Sigourney Weaver. Great film.
1:10:15
Stryker
Yeah, great film.
1:10:16
Drew
Why, thank you.
1:10:17
Stryker
Who did you play in that?
1:10:18
Drew
I played one of the female alien that gets together with Tony Shalhoum and, you know.
1:10:23
Stryker
Yeah.
1:10:24
Drew
Yeah.
1:10:24
Stryker
How do you like the stand up world?
1:10:26
Drew
I don't do a lot of it. It's funny, it was just something that really scared me and I just thought, oh, I've always wanted to try this and so I actually took a class. But it was really fun and...
1:10:39
Stryker
Stand up class. What did they teach you?
1:10:42
Drew
They basically just taught you, you know, it had always been sort of an enigma to me, like how you get on stage and it was just breaking it down into, you know, what's... She had these five catch words, like what's weird, what's hard, what's scary, what's stupid about whatever and to make it really personal to your life and then you can go away from that once you can get your own set. You could take the class too.
1:11:06
Stryker
He could.
1:11:07
Stryker
He's funny enough as it is.
1:11:09
Drew
Hilarious.
1:11:10
Stryker
I should probably take the class. By the way, Missy's in Soul Plane, which came out on Friday with Snoop Dogg.
1:11:15
Stryker
And Tom Arnold.
1:11:16
Stryker
Yeah, and Tom Arnold. Who's your friend, correct? Was the smell of marijuana prevalent on the set of Soul Plane?
1:11:21
Drew
I thought they were fog machines. Really?
1:11:24
Stryker
Fog machines. And you couldn't smell it over the high karate that Bishop Dogg won, that's where I am. Snoop Dogg!
1:11:32
Stryker
All right, Jenny, what's up? You're 17.
1:11:35
Stryker
Well, I just want to know what Drew thinks of Augiplex.
1:11:41
Stryker
I heard Snoop Dogg and Dr. Drew was at your door.
1:11:45
Stryker
My man mayonnaise Anderson is a good guy.
1:11:48
Stryker
What's that, Jenny?
1:11:49
Stryker
The pill Augiplex for men.
1:11:52
Stryker
What is that?
1:11:53
Stryker
It's, I read in the ad, it's like a pill guys can take and it like, it makes them have like multiples.
1:12:03
Stryker
There's no such thing.
1:12:05
Stryker
No?
1:12:05
Stryker
Any of you can buy over the counter is not going to have much effect.
1:12:08
Stryker
Wait, this pill supposedly makes you come over and over again?
1:12:12
Stryker
What's the problem?
1:12:14
Stryker
Oh, there's no problem. We've been dating a year and a half and well, he wants to have sex all the time. Well, I do. We both do, but he gets tired.
1:12:27
Stryker
What does that mean?
1:12:28
Stryker
Like, after the first time, he'll be all tired and like out of it, like, and I don't want to go.
1:12:34
Stryker
He can't get an erection after he ejaculates the first time.
1:12:37
Stryker
Well, he does. Like, he'll, like, he'll get an erection and then he's done.
1:12:42
Stryker
It's like, How long is that? Too fast? Is that the problem?
1:12:45
Stryker
No, he'll go on. It's just he gets tired and he won't want to do it more than once a day or it'll hurt.
1:12:53
Drew
After having an orgasm?
1:12:54
Stryker
What is it? What is it you're in for? What are you looking for?
1:12:57
Stryker
What is he what?
1:12:58
Stryker
What are you looking for? What is it that he needs to do for you?
1:13:01
Stryker
Oh, just, I wish it would go on and on.
1:13:05
Stryker
What about the oral department? After he's done, if he can't get it up or if he doesn't want to go again, you could be satisfied if he's good down there. Would that satisfy you?
1:13:15
Stryker
Yeah, but sometimes he doesn't want to do that either.
1:13:19
Stryker
Now that's bad. Now that's bad on him. Getting tired is one thing.
1:13:23
Stryker
Now, either he's sort of an idiot and is just unwell to kind of...
1:13:26
Stryker
Well, he'll want to do it, but then like only once and then it's like, whatever.
1:13:31
Stryker
Or Jenny is again a sexual abuse survivor and she's now very compulsive sexually and cannot be satisfied. It is the night. So which is it, Jenny? Which is it?
1:13:42
Stryker
I don't know.
1:13:45
Stryker
Which is it? One or the other? Listen, he is not willing to sort of give you what you need and he's sort of a lazy idiot or you were sexually abused and you're sexual compulsive and you can't be satisfied. Which is it?
1:14:00
Stryker
I wasn't sexually abused really, but it wasn't like without clothes. I was really young. I had to be like maybe...
1:14:08
Stryker
It doesn't matter.
1:14:10
Stryker
There's some sexual abuse here. All right. Well, there you go.
1:14:14
Stryker
But, I don't know, I've been sexually active for a long time. I mean, he's my first. We've been dating for like a year and a half.
1:14:22
Stryker
So you have trouble being satisfied. Is that the bottom line?
1:14:25
Stryker
Yeah. I can go on forever.
1:14:27
Stryker
Okay. Well, that's a disorder. That's a problem. So it really isn't his problem. It's that you are sexually compulsive and you can't be satisfied. And that's a problem.
1:14:35
Drew
So the lady wants to have more than one. That's a problem.
1:14:38
Stryker
Not more than one. This is like... It just can't be. She doesn't want to go to school. She wants to just have sex constantly. And let's ask her if that's in fact the case. So Jenny. You could basically go all day with him as far as you're concerned. Never stop. Never stop.
1:14:55
Stryker
No.
1:14:55
Stryker
That's not more than one, Missi. That's...
1:14:58
Stryker
Okay.
1:14:58
Stryker
But you know what?
1:15:00
Stryker
Maybe once a month, everyone needs something like that.
1:15:04
Stryker
Jenny's got a disorder and she may be bipolar too. There can be bipolarity. It can be part of that. But this is not about him. This is about Jenny, unfortunately. He probably, he probably literally does try to keep up and literally tires out after a few hours.
1:15:15
Stryker
But if you are a guy that either, maybe you go 20 minutes the first time and you need an hour to get, you know, your part working again, the oral thing, man, girls, some of them even like that better from what, from the noises they make from when I do it.
1:15:29
Stryker
More than half.
1:15:29
Stryker
Yeah, more than the actual sex. Do you have a take on that, Missi? I'm not asking your, you know, what you think, but do you think...
1:15:37
Stryker
Girls you've spoken to.
1:15:38
Drew
Yes. Look, I've spoken to other girls who seem to like it quite a bit.
1:15:44
Stryker
Right. And you will pat your man on the back for doing that after he... Right?
1:15:49
Drew
Oh yeah, we... I mean, friends of mine.
1:15:54
Stryker
Right.
1:15:55
Drew
My friends would appreciate it.
1:15:56
Stryker
Right. Chris? You're 21.
1:16:01
Stryker
Hi, yeah, okay, my question is, I've got a couple of dark hairs on my breath. And I heard someone say that that can be related to ovarian cancer or like...
1:16:18
Stryker
No, no, no, no... Heresotism, hair all over your body in a male distribution can be associated with androgen producing ovarian tumors. Not a couple of stray hairs here and there. Everybody has stray hairs here and there.
1:16:34
Drew
Girl, you just need a tweezer.
1:16:37
Caller
No, I do. Trust me.
1:16:38
Stryker
I'm just... It freaked me out. Someone said that you can have tumors and stuff and...
1:16:42
Stryker
No, that's androgenizing tumors when you literally develop hair growth like a male pattern hair growth, okay?
1:16:49
Stryker
Oh, okay.
1:16:51
Stryker
Thank God for Dr. Drew. All right. Now we got to go to Chris. 22. What's up, man?
1:16:57
Thank God for Dr. Drew.
1:17:00
Stryker
Yeah?
1:17:01
Stryker
22. What's up?
1:17:02
Stryker
Hello? Anyway, basically I've had sex only two girls, but a couple of times, especially with the girls that I'm with now.
1:17:12
Stryker
Why don't you go no play, playa?
1:17:14
Stryker
I don't have a play.
1:17:17
Stryker
But I've been unable to finish with any of them ever.
1:17:23
Stryker
Meaning you go for a long time and never have orgasm.
1:17:26
Stryker
Never.
1:17:27
Stryker
But you don't lose your erection, anything like that?
1:17:29
Stryker
Not at all. Not at all.
1:17:31
Stryker
I've had phases like that.
1:17:33
Stryker
I thought the first time it might have been just because I was nervous and I figured I actually expected the exact opposite.
1:17:40
Stryker
What's the longest relationship you've had?
1:17:43
Stryker
No relationship. I haven't had a girlfriend.
1:17:46
Stryker
That's what you need. You need to sort of work it out, person.
1:17:48
Stryker
Because once you get comfortable, you may even go too quick at that point.
1:17:51
Stryker
It's totally different when you're in a relationship. These are just sort of experiences you're having.
1:17:57
Drew
So for a guy, that's not necessarily a problem. Because I know a lot of women who can't have an orgasm for sex.
1:18:03
Stryker
Here's the deal. Most women will never have orgasm during sex.
1:18:07
Drew
Really?
1:18:07
Stryker
Most, more than 50% will never have it with sex. I think Missy's revealed something here.
1:18:16
Drew
I mean...
1:18:17
Stryker
Yes, most will not have it during sex. They will have it only with oral sex. And a significant majority won't have any orgasms either way until they're about 22. And so, the biology doesn't really come online until late in adolescence. And even then, it's not with intercourse. Although about 10% will have multiple orgasms and just have two sit-ups and have orgasms.
1:18:38
Stryker
I was with somebody, and explain this to me, who couldn't have it in oral but had it in sex.
1:18:42
Stryker
Right, that's the multiple type. And she probably had more than one.
1:18:46
Stryker
Well, I don't know.
1:18:47
Stryker
Scratches? I don't know. I don't know.
1:18:49
Stryker
No, I'm not saying. My skills are not.
1:18:51
Stryker
The tend to have multiple tend to not find oral in any way.
1:18:54
Stryker
Because I thought that was very odd.
1:18:55
Stryker
That is very odd. Given your experience, that's right.
1:18:57
Stryker
I don't have that much experience.
1:18:59
Stryker
Let's talk to Nicky.
1:18:59
Stryker
I'm a young, innocent lad from the west side of Los Angeles. Nicky, you're 19.
1:19:07
Stryker
Yes, ma'am.
1:19:07
Stryker
I'm 19, and I'm like really, really horny, and I don't have like any history of any like sexual abuse or anything.
1:19:19
Stryker
I'm really horny. Are you acting on it? And with one person or multiple people? One person. And is he able to keep up with you? Then that's good. That's a good thing. See how different that is? Then somebody who's saying, I can never be satisfied. My boyfriend can't keep up, or he's complaining. Or somebody who has multiple partners and can never seem to have a relationship.
1:19:43
Drew
What are you concerned about?
1:19:46
Stryker
Well, we didn't hear all that. What's that?
1:19:48
Stryker
Like why am I always horny?
1:19:50
Stryker
Because you're 19. That's a good thing. It's a healthy thing. It means you're alive and you're normal. The abnormal part comes in when you can't be satisfied, you can't have relationships, and you have a history of trauma. That's where it comes from.
1:20:03
Drew
But I ask myself, why can't I always be horny?
1:20:07
Stryker
Good question.
1:20:08
Drew
I know.
1:20:09
Stryker
What's the answer?
1:20:12
Drew
What was what?
1:20:14
Stryker
What about the comedy class, what's the real ball with that?
1:20:18
Drew
It's weird about always being horny.
1:20:20
Stryker
You know, I was noticing.
1:20:22
Stryker
No, Nikki, it sounds fine. You're all right? Your relationship is stable?
1:20:26
Stryker
Uh-huh.
1:20:27
Stryker
Yeah?
1:20:28
Stryker
Yeah, I've been with my boyfriend for like four years.
1:20:30
Stryker
No, it's good. Is he able to keep up with you all right? Uh-huh. Yes.
1:20:34
Drew
This is good. You're always horny with him. That's exciting.
1:20:37
Stryker
That's good. Excellent. We'll ask her about orgasm function. Are you having orgasm during sex?
1:20:44
Stryker
How about oral sex?
1:20:45
Stryker
You have multiple orgasms?
1:20:47
Stryker
Like a lot.
1:20:48
Stryker
Yeah, yeah.
1:20:48
Stryker
This is this.
1:20:49
Stryker
And so, and so you don't like oral sex, right?
1:20:52
Stryker
I'm fine with oral.
1:20:54
Stryker
What's that?
1:20:54
Stryker
I'm fine with oral.
1:20:55
Stryker
You're fine with it. So you like it all different ways. But Nikki's one of these people that have multiple like over and over and over again. They don't have refractory phases.
1:21:02
Stryker
What about sex orgasm in some girls can only have it in certain positions?
1:21:07
Stryker
Have orgasm certain positions. They have to kind of figure that out. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's a normal thing.
1:21:10
Drew
You know, that's the whole thing about like, you know, let's, you know, let's have sex in the bathroom. Let's, you know, I mean, for a woman, it's like nothing would be less comfortable. I mean, you really it's like the bed is where you.
1:21:23
Stryker
Yes.
1:21:24
Drew
Where it works.
1:21:24
Stryker
Plus women have a thing about germs too.
1:21:27
Stryker
She didn't say it necessarily public bathroom at the Dodger Stadium.
1:21:30
Stryker
No, I'm just saying women are very tuned into. I really think that's an evolutionary thing too. It's like they had to keep everybody from getting sick. And so you're very tuned into that stuff.
1:21:38
Stryker
But there are some counters in bathrooms that are perfect height, I would assume.
1:21:42
Stryker
You go ahead and try to persuade your girlfriend, Stryker. Go ahead, it's fine.
1:21:46
Drew
It's different for us.
1:21:48
Stryker
The point is, is it exciting though? Just like every so often?
1:21:52
Drew
It could be exciting, but I don't think that a woman is going to have an orgasm on the counter.
1:21:56
Stryker
Guys can be skydiving. Men are just so, come on.
1:22:00
Stryker
I could do it while I'm doing my taxes. While I'm driving on the 10 freeway late at night.
1:22:06
Stryker
With a fox in a box.
1:22:07
Stryker
That's right.
1:22:08
Stryker
Could you?
1:22:09
Stryker
A train in the rain?
1:22:11
Stryker
Oh my God. All right, who are we going to? Abby?
1:22:14
Stryker
We're going to break.
1:22:15
Stryker
Break, yeah, we got to break. That's what we're doing. All right, I'm going to go use the bathroom.
1:22:18
Stryker
Me too.
1:22:18
Stryker
No, see, you just want to try to have sex with me in the bathroom. Don't you, Drew?
1:22:21
Stryker
No.
1:22:22
Stryker
No.
1:22:22
Stryker
I want to pee. So let's go do that.
1:22:24
Stryker
We'll go do that together. We'll cross swords.
1:22:26
Stryker
I like it a lot.
1:22:27
Stryker
Missi Pyle is here. We'll talk to her some more and talk to some of you guys calling in to the show, Love Line, after this. Look, with all my other boyfriends, I've only given them hand jobs. Thanks . We're back here on Loveline. About 15 minutes left with Dr. Drew. I'm Stryker, and Missi Pyle is here. And if you want to see Soul Plane, you saw Missi in the movie. What role do you play in Soul Plane?
1:23:08
Drew
The White Lady.
1:23:09
Stryker
The White Lady. Is there only one? So credits roll. Snoop Dogg, White Lady, Missi Pyle.
1:23:15
Drew
No, her name is Barbara, and she's sort of a-
1:23:17
Stryker
Are you a flight attendant?
1:23:19
Drew
No, I'm not. I'm the White, like Tom Arnold and I have gone with his two children, so there isn't his daughter, Ariel Cabello, who's very good in the movie as well, is the other White Lady in the movie. But we've gone to Crackerland on vacation. And it's a raunchy movie. It's raunchy. I say some raunchy things. It was a lot of fun. Actually did a talk show and they couldn't show the clip because the MP rating people wouldn't. But it's just dialogue.
1:23:53
Stryker
And then June 18th, you got the dodgeball movie opening up. Which is looks, I mean, everyone's going to go see, you know, everyone's going to see that thing.
1:23:59
Drew
I hope so.
1:24:00
Stryker
How are they not going to see it?
1:24:01
Drew
It's a really awesome story. And I play a sort of a Russian dodgeball champion. I have these giant buns on either side of my head and a unibrow. I wear a unibrow and fake teeth and a mole and a fake butt.
1:24:16
Stryker
Big butt?
1:24:18
Drew
It's a fake, like an actual butt pad. And I'm on the movie poster as this person. Like my first movie poster and I'm hideous.
1:24:27
Stryker
That's cool. Don't look at me. I'm hideous. But right now you're not hideous, which is good.
1:24:31
Drew
Well, that's nice.
1:24:33
Stryker
All right, Drew, where are we going? Christine, 15. What's going on?
1:24:36
Stryker
Hello?
1:24:38
Stryker
Yep.
1:24:39
Stryker
Hello?
1:24:40
Stryker
Go ahead.
1:24:42
Stryker
Oh, my question is, okay, I'm 15 and I'm a virgin and I like every two days I get like these urges, two and a half sex.
1:24:51
Stryker
What do you mean?
1:24:52
Stryker
I don't know. I just, it's like I get these urges, like.
1:24:56
Stryker
Well, the urges are normal and the part of sort of growing up is learning to contain these and focus these urges.
1:25:03
Stryker
I'll be like at home, like in the living room with like my mom there. And then I'll be like, oh my gosh, it's like you'll see a commercial and it's like, oh my gosh, I want to do that. Then you come upstairs and then, you know, you start to do stuff to yourself.
1:25:20
Stryker
That's a good strategy. Do stuff to yourself and don't do something to anybody else. Wait a couple of years, right?
1:25:28
Drew
It's perfectly normal.
1:25:30
Stryker
I miss you, Teller.
1:25:31
Drew
It's perfectly normal. These urges that you have. We all had them.
1:25:37
Stryker
I have one now. Let me go to the bathroom.
1:25:43
Stryker
Christine, it's good that you take care of yourself and you don't act on these urges until you're really ready, okay? Are you there?
1:25:50
Stryker
I think she, her parents are right outside her door.
1:25:54
Stryker
Hello? Yeah.
1:25:56
Stryker
Maybe she was masturbating.
1:25:57
Stryker
She's talking.
1:25:58
Drew
Maybe you gave her something to do.
1:26:00
Stryker
Oh, she did? Why is it so hard to hear tonight on these phones?
1:26:03
Stryker
Talk to Meg.
1:26:04
Stryker
What's up, Meg?
1:26:05
Stryker
Hello?
1:26:07
Stryker
What's going on?
1:26:09
Stryker
Hi. I have a question about kind of a lot of stuff, but basically my main question is, like, I always have this kind of thing where me and my best friend, we really want to leave and go to California because it really sucks here and for some reason it just, like, the situation is like we really want to leave.
1:26:34
Stryker
We all want to come to Seattle, so maybe we can do it.
1:26:36
Stryker
Well, Meg, I'll tell you exactly what's going to happen if you move here. You're going to get to LA. They will actually hand you a TV show. All right? You will be with the best agency. Then a teen magazine is going to put you on the cover.
1:26:49
Drew
The cover.
1:26:49
Stryker
And then you'll probably go on a date with Justin Timberlake. Then you'll be on the cover of The Inquirer. And then you're going to have your coke problem.
1:26:57
Drew
Or anorexia.
1:26:58
Stryker
Right, exactly.
1:26:59
Drew
Which might lead to...
1:27:00
Stryker
And then you're going to be pushed aside and get more C-rolls. But then your big comeback will happen in a couple of years. And you're probably going to get cast with De Niro.
1:27:07
Stryker
Well, we don't want to tell them the rest.
1:27:09
Stryker
And the rest. So, yeah. Meg, I don't know if you want to do it. You're only 15.
1:27:13
Stryker
That's not even what I want to do, actually.
1:27:16
Drew
But a good try.
1:27:17
Stryker
Here's the deal. Meg, there's only one reason that young people leave their family. And that is there's some sort of horrible chaos or abuse in the home. So, if there's not that, first of all, if there is that, call Child Protective Services. If there's not that, hang out until you can get into a college and go away to a good school.
1:27:33
Stryker
I actually am in college. That's the thing. I dropped out of high school and I'm in college right now.
1:27:37
Stryker
Then 15? Where do you go?
1:27:40
Stryker
It's a community college, but I'm 15, so I think it counts for something.
1:27:48
Drew
How did you drop out of high school and get into college?
1:27:50
Stryker
Well, it's like how they have that running start thing where you can, you know, like have half high school and half college, except the high school thing wasn't working for me because they're trying to do this renovation thing and trying to make it all better, but it was kind of crappy.
1:28:03
Stryker
So what are you going to do?
1:28:08
Stryker
Well, I don't know, because like I really know I need to finish the college thing, but it's like I want to just try something else, like I really, I know it's kind of a dumb thing, but I want to be in a band or something, but I don't know.
1:28:20
Stryker
Capital Records is out here on Vine. It's the big round thing in that new movie. It gets blown up.
1:28:25
Stryker
The next tomorrow.
1:28:26
Stryker
Yeah. Finish your school when you're 18 and you have some money. As Drew said, then get the hell out and do your thing.
1:28:35
Stryker
But sometimes I think the real problem I think is that I don't know if I can wait that long. Like I've had problems like I'm diagnosed with depression and a lot of problems. And I'm really scared that I'm not going to be able to like wait that long.
1:28:50
Stryker
But like I'm going to like doing a geographic, making a major change in where you live is not considered a state, a good thing to do with those sorts of problems.
1:29:02
Stryker
My mom says that even if I leave, I'll still have myself with me.
1:29:08
Stryker
Well, not only have yourself with you, you won't have anything else. You won't have your usual resources. And that's what really leads people into big, serious problems. So stay where you are, stay put, finish school, get, you know, get some stuff. Once you have got some therapy under your belt, feel whole and complete, and don't have the urge to solve your problems by making a geographic change, that's when you leave.
1:29:30
Drew
But what's... Do you have a... do you play an instrument? Do you sing?
1:29:33
Stryker
That's a good question.
1:29:36
Stryker
And I was going to say, to you, Meg, you don't need to come to LA to be in a band. I think there's this band called Nirvana that was from Seattle, Stone Temple, Pilots Pearl Jam, Temple the Dog, Soundgarden.
1:29:48
Drew
Maybe you should... are you in a band?
1:29:53
Stryker
I'm not really in a band at the moment, but my best friend, she is learning to play guitar too, and I have a friend who plays drums.
1:30:00
Stryker
That's awesome. Why don't you guys just... Yeah, just screw around out there.
1:30:04
Stryker
Yeah, we suck, and we don't, like, I don't know, I think probably some of it is because, like, where I am, like, living with my parents and everything, I can't really, I can't do anything, I can't go out and do what I want to do, and my mom kind of tries to control everything in my life, and it really, it's hurtful.
1:30:22
Stryker
Meg, you're 15. You're 15.
1:30:26
Stryker
That annoyed me.
1:30:26
Stryker
That's the reality. You're 15.
1:30:28
Stryker
Yeah.
1:30:28
Stryker
Start the band out there.
1:30:32
Stryker
Mom may be intrusive, and she may be paying the ass. At least she's doing her job as a parent, number one.
1:30:37
Drew
You think you know everything at 15.
1:30:38
Stryker
I know.
1:30:39
Stryker
Lay low, and get out when you're 18, go somewhere away to school, but don't sacrifice everything to try to solve your problems with the geographic change. It's not going to work.
1:30:49
Drew
And the thing is, too, people are so ready to grow up, and once you turn 18 or 22, whenever you get out of school and you start paying your own bills, I'd love to go back. Have someone pay my rent and buy me clothes and feed me.
1:31:04
Stryker
Steve, 22.
1:31:06
Stryker
Hey, how's it going, guys? I have a problem that really sucks. I can't ejaculate when I'm with a woman. And yeah, basically, I have to finish myself off every time. That is...
1:31:22
Stryker
Wait, and there's girls that love to watch that. Do you find that happening with you at all, Steve?
1:31:30
Stryker
Not really. It's just kind of a pain in the butt.
1:31:34
Stryker
Well, Adam's thing is that sex is good. It's just not the real thing. Because for him, the real thing is masturbation. And he has a technique where he thinks you have to sort of find a position that's akin to that which you have become accustomed to by yourself. And to sort of slowly include the other human into the activity. And eventually, it kind of gets better, but it's tough. It's a tough thing. We've heard that before. It's a tough one to overcome. Usually, there can be other kinds of ways. Maybe he'd get himself sort of geared up before it starts, sort of.
1:32:08
Drew
My question.
1:32:09
Stryker
We've got 10 seconds.
1:32:10
Drew
Do you masturbate to porn? I mean...
1:32:13
Stryker
Steve?
1:32:13
Stryker
I'm trying to cut back.
1:32:16
Stryker
Well maybe you're masturbating too much. And you're just accustomed to your hand, obviously.
1:32:21
Stryker
But not only that.
1:32:22
Stryker
You've got to slow down a little bit.
1:32:23
Stryker
You need a little bit of a visual image, then maybe they can incorporate that in, but more importantly, maybe his body needs a chance to sort of rebuild the fluids.
1:32:30
Stryker
Exactly.
1:32:30
Stryker
All right, we're going to take a break.
1:32:32
Stryker
All right, we're going to take a break. I'm going to go watch a little porn. We'll be back on Loveline.
1:32:35
Stryker
Okay, so I know there's nothing wrong with me. So what's up?
1:33:04
Stryker
Missi Pyle, yeah!
1:33:11
Drew
Yay!
1:33:11
Stryker
Well done.
1:33:11
Drew
Missi, good job on everything.
1:33:11
Stryker
Thank you.
1:33:12
Drew
You did a nice job too.
1:33:12
Stryker
Oh, thanks. I appreciate that. You are kicking ass. Soul Plane is already out and I will be first in line to see you in Dodgeball, a true underdog story. That's going to be fantastic. I can't wait to see you in a bra and your large ass.
1:33:23
Drew
Oh, thank you.
1:33:24
Stryker
In the movie.
1:33:25
Drew
I can't wait.
1:33:26
Stryker
Right. It's going to be good. Now, wait. Real quick. Your parents fly out from where they are to go to the red carpets and all that?
1:33:32
Drew
Sometimes. They do? Sometimes certain family members of mine will come out.
1:33:35
Stryker
Nice.
1:33:36
Drew
Yeah.
1:33:36
Stryker
Well, we will see you on TV and at the MTV Movie Awards very soon. Drew, I will see you tomorrow at 10 p.m. on your radio station. I'm Stryker and for Drew, we are saying goodbye. Hey, sir, can you please buy me the Big Dildo?
1:33:52
Stryker
This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Ingold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.