Episode 1000608905937

0:54 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content. Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:03 Drew It's Loveline.

1:04 Voiceover And Adam, that's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew, board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. Tonight, he's in Syracuse, in, what'd you do? You were Cornell today, Drew?

1:17 Drew I was at Cornell today, Adam.

1:19 Adam And where are you now?

1:20 Drew I'm in Syracuse, in the middle of a huge electrical storm.

1:24 Adam Really? Yeah.

1:25 Drew Remember, the last time you and I were here, there'd been a tornado.

1:28 Adam That's right. And it blew through a graveyard.

1:32 Drew Cemetery.

1:33 Adam Behind, behind the, where were we? In Syracuse, yeah. And we took a walk through it. It was very lovely. Colby is here tonight, Colby Donaldson, everybody. He's got a last name. Colby's here from Survivor. Yeah.

1:47 What is up? Drew, the one time I come over here and you're not here.

1:50 Drew I know, it's ridiculous.

1:52 I'm disappointed. I wanted to come back. Well, I will definitely do that. I was telling Adam, I've been watching you guys since 95, right after Adam came on.

1:59 Adam God bless Colby. And Drew, what's my favorite show on television?

2:04 Drew Anyone that kisses your ass adequately.

2:08 Wait a minute. This week it's Survivor.

2:10 Adam That's right. No, listen, I've never missed an episode of Survivor. It's the best, most compelling show on television. First season? Here's, I gotta be honest with you. I was spotty on the first season. I was sort of like, I don't know if I wanna be drawn in because then this is gonna be just one more thing I gotta do instead of whatever it is I gotta do. And so spotty. But then from second on, pow. And Colby came in second in the Africa one, which-

2:41 Australia.

2:42 Adam Oh, Australia, which is one where I just, your drink, that was one where you're drinking out of the mud puddle, right?

2:49 Well, Africa was the mud. Australia was the second season. It was the big one over there when we had to deal with all the snakes. We had a huge flood that came through and washed out the camp and all that fun stuff.

2:59 Drew That was the Jerry one, wasn't it?

3:01 That's right. Jerry was my cohort.

3:03 Adam But what happened, you know, Colby came in second place, but could have easily come in first place had he picked the person that nobody liked. But he went with the good person. Instead, people thought it was noble yet stupid.

3:17 There you go.

3:17 Adam Is that true?

3:18 I've certainly had to answer that question many a time since then. What were you thinking and do you regret it? Because I took, took Tina, right? Knowing that it was a pretty good chance. I just gave away a million dollars.

3:31 Adam Right. Because she was a sympathetic character.

3:34 Whereas, well, I don't, there's certainly wasn't sympathy playing into it. She was, to me, she was the person that deserved to be there. I mean, she had played one heck of a game. One of the most competitive people, not only female, but male included that I've ever met. Really? And it was just impressive to, to get to know her and see how she was playing the game. And when it came down to the end and I won that final immunity and got to decide who I was going to take into the finals, to me, it was a really easy decision. I mean, Keith did not deserve to be there. He was, you know, somewhat of a pawn that she and I had brought along the entire time. And, and, and it was OK with me to, to, to pick her and give the jury a shot to choose either her or me. And ultimately they choose chose her.

4:19 Adam Quite true. I know the sound you make when you're thinking about talking. Colby, the All-Star, it seems to me now, now.

4:28 Oh, this ought to be good.

4:29 Adam No, no. Here's what I'm saying. Colby has been voted off the All-Star survivor, but it seemed to me that you had a lot more bravado this time around, that the first time we saw you in Australia, you were sort of just glad to be off the farm kind of thing. And now you showed up, maybe Hollywood had gotten to you just a little bit, banged a couple of supermodels, done a couple rails of heroin. And there's a new Colby that showed up, who knew what you had at this point?

5:00 Caller I don't know that that was it.

5:02 Adam I think I know I just think it was I think it was not cocky, not cocky, confident.

5:07 Caller Well, thanks for saying not cocky. But I think it was just a guy who three and a half years later matured a little bit. And that's all it was. I was a little different guy going into this one than I was the first time.

5:16 Adam Well, how old were you for the first? 26. And until then had had no real taste of life in the big city, so to speak.

5:26 Caller That's right.

5:26 Adam He said Colby's from a place called the Cristobal, Texas, where they have a half a stop sign, Drew. It's just the S and the T. There's no OOP, they have no stoplights. Mr. Haney's there.

5:42 Drew Are you a Mormon?

5:44 Adam It's crazy.

5:44 Caller It's tiny. It's basically Thatch-Tut Village.

5:48 Adam And people all know whoever's in town and know what everyone's up to and knows who's dating who and that kind of thing.

5:54 Drew Are you a Mormon?

5:56 Caller No, no, no, no.

5:59 Adam We're laughing because it's a drop that the engineer Anderson Pelystee gets everybody all the time. Drew, you there?

6:05 Drew I'm here.

6:05 Adam Okay, quiet. So you go from a Cristobal, you end up going- Cristobal, sorry. You end up, it just, it sounds like something expensive a black guy would drink. And then you go to Texas Tech. What am I looking for?

6:19 Caller Yep.

6:21 Adam What are they? What are they?

6:22 Caller The Red Raiders, Bobby Knight.

6:23 Adam The Red Raiders, come on, I got it. I got it. You go to Texas Tech, you graduate with a degree in business and marketing, right? Right. And then it's off to where?

6:35 Caller Worked corporate a couple of years, starting down in Houston and then in Dallas in sales for an HMO company. Decided the nine to five was not gonna work. So started my own hot rod shop, basically. Building street rods and muscle cars, that sort of thing.

6:50 Adam You should see Colby, by the way, he's driving, Drew, he's driving a Ferrari 360.

6:56 Caller We know. But no, no, no, no, hold on, Drew.

6:58 Adam Yes.

6:59 Caller Adam, you gotta, I told you.

7:00 Adam I know, it's gonna get better. Go ahead. It's his old lady's.

7:04 Caller It's not my car.

7:05 Adam It's not his car. Better, yes?

7:07 Drew Yeah. Yes.

7:08 Adam I mean, in the cool department. No, that's what I'm saying. Like, it goes, like here's how it goes, like on the cool, you know, chart. It goes like, hey, he's driving his own, I'm going up here, Drew. He's driving his own 360 Ferrari. It's not mine. Oops, dropped down. Oh, it's my old lady's. Back up again. You keep it higher.

7:28 Drew Your old lady's, no apology. It's not like, yeah, no, no, no. It's like, hey, oh.

7:32 Caller No, that's exactly right. I get, you know, I get asked about the car a lot whenever I do get the privilege of taking it out for a spin. And I'm so quick to point out, wait, wait, wait. I wish it was mine. It's not, it's my girlfriend's. And then the eyebrows always get raised, you know.

7:45 Adam And then people want to know, is she somebody we know?

7:47 Caller Well, first of all, she's a lot hotter than that car is. I'll tell you that. And it, I mean, she's not an actress. She's not in the business, which is nice.

7:56 Adam Where does she get all her money?

7:58 Caller Well, I'll tell you this. I met her in LA traffic. So I had cuss traffic until that day. And I need to point out, she was not driving that car when I met her. She was just in a regular old SUV. And I happened to be sitting beside her at a stoplight and.

8:11 Adam But she recognized you.

8:12 Caller No, no, no. And this is the honest truth that I finally got her friends to confess to it. And cause she was telling me the whole time and had never seen the show, had no clue who I was. It really, I mean, she just, she's not into that. Doesn't even live in LA. Just happened to be here.

8:26 Adam All right. She's just some chick who just honks and picks up guys on the street.

8:30 Caller Well, that's what I was thinking. See her first question when I asked her for her number and she started laughing and she said, you've got to be kidding me. And she said, do you always ask girls when you're sitting in traffic for their phone number? And then of course she gave it to me. I said, do you always give guys your number that asked for it?

8:46 Adam So where does she get her dough? Just out of curiosity.

8:50 Caller She has a business, a children's clothing store.

8:55 Adam Wow. And she makes that kind of money?

8:57 Caller She makes good money at the children's clothing store. It's out in Palm Springs. So you know those people out there have money.

9:01 Adam Yeah. Hey, Drew. Yeah. All right.

9:05 Caller Freaking out.

9:05 Adam Sounds good, right? And you know, the whole part about her either knowing you or not knowing who you were, it's of little consequence.

9:13 Caller It really is.

9:14 Adam If she knew who you were, great. If not, you're some good looking guys driving a pickup truck.

9:17 Caller There you go.

9:18 Adam All right. Let's get to the phones. We'll speak to Gary. Gary's. You know why we're talking to Gary, Drew? Why? Because he's number one. No. Well, yes. But mainly the sticker, your little post-it, you know how you pick the phone calls on the screen.

9:35 Drew Still there from last night.

9:36 Adam That's right.

9:39 Caller So that's who we're going with.

9:41 Adam Gary.

9:41 Hello.

9:43 Adam You're 24?

9:44 Caller Yeah.

9:45 Adam You get gas when you're having sex?

9:48 Caller Yeah. Going at it pretty rough and my stomach starts bubbling. A couple of times I squeezed off a couple of quiet, unstinking ones. But one time I let one rip kind of hard and I mean, it kind of made my girlfriend laugh, but at the same time it was kind of embarrassing.

10:05 Adam All right. Well, she laughed. You're fine.

10:09 Caller But I mean, how do I solve the problem? I mean, what if I let like a pretty...

10:13 Adam Oh, shut up. He doesn't care about that. He's calling from Alaska.

10:16 Drew Thank you.

10:17 Adam Colby, have you broken wind around the new lady yet?

10:19 Drew Yeah.

10:20 Adam Yeah, good. Because there's a window and it's a weird window, which is it's like, and I, Drew, think of a number. I'm going to write a number down. Think of a number of weeks. If you're dating someone, it's going well. And when you break wind, you meet someone.

10:39 Drew The window is after what number after which does it get weird?

10:44 Adam Oh, okay. So if it goes this long, okay, let me give Colby a piece of paper too. Don't let me see. Wait a minute. Write it down with this highlighter here on the same yellow colored paper. Here's the question. Here's the question. No, use this Post-it pad. There you go. And then pick a call using the same Post-it note later on. Now don't write anything yet. Here's the question. How many weeks or months? Let's say months.

11:10 Drew Weeks. Weeks.

11:11 Adam Okay. Let's say weeks. How many weeks do you go, if you meet somebody, if you're seeing them exclusively, if it's moving right along at a nice pace and it looks like this is heading somewhere before you got to break wind, before it gets weird, because if you go two years without breaking wind, then you can never break wind. Right. I'm going to write my number down. This is just write the number of weeks. I'm turning my back to Colby. Drew, do you have?

11:35 Caller No.

11:35 Adam Hold on a second. I'm writing. I'm writing a number down.

11:38 Caller This is tough.

11:39 Adam It depends when you start sleeping together.

11:40 Caller Now you're saying from the point at which you become exclusive.

11:43 Drew So you're officially exclusive. You're hot and heavy. You're sleeping together.

11:47 Adam But let's just say after, let's just say after the first date, after the first date.

11:52 Drew But things move quickly.

11:54 Adam Things move quickly and they're going well. Not a speed bump in the road.

11:59 Drew How many weeks?

11:59 Adam It doesn't mean you're banging her on the second date. How many weeks? I'm writing and you can you can break in. You can go into fractions here.

12:07 Drew No I got a round number.

12:09 Adam Oh, you got a round number? I'll change mine to round number. Hold on a second.

12:12 Caller I got mine, Drew.

12:13 Adam I got mine. I got mine. Yeah.

12:16 Drew The reveal. I'm going when they can't reveal, so I got to say.

12:20 Adam Colby's got 15 minutes. No, he's got four weeks. I got five weeks here.

12:25 Drew Well, I was going to put 10.

12:27 Adam Ten?

12:27 Drew Ten? Ten? You have to reach it gets weird.

12:30 Adam No.

12:31 Drew It's weird after four. Before you start, you guys are going to... when are you going to start farting?

12:36 Adam Well, when do I start farting?

12:38 Drew Three days?

12:39 Adam Well, no, no, you start farting in five weeks.

12:42 Drew No, the question was after how many weeks do you have to... do you have to get it in before after which it becomes weird?

12:50 Caller Well, see, my number is the same.

12:51 Adam I pick the number when I start when I start breaking wind.

12:54 Caller No, here's my question.

12:56 Drew You know, if you don't get it in by ten weeks, you ain't never going to do it.

13:00 Adam That's what I'm saying. So I get it in at five.

13:02 Caller Here's my question.

13:03 Drew When you start. All right.

13:05 Caller Here's my question, Doc, because I'm actually dealing with this with my girlfriend. I've become so comfortable and we've been together nine months. I've become so comfortable farting around her. Yes, she's now concerned that I'm going to forget when I'm not around her. And I'm, you know, someplace in a professional setting and just let one rip. And she said, Colby, you really got to check that doesn't bother me. But it is going to embarrass us both one of these days when you forget where we are.

13:29 Drew No, we have to translate that because that would mean that every male on earth would be having trouble deciding when he's alone with his girlfriend as opposed to in the doctor's office.

13:37 Adam Yeah, that's I I'll tell you. Here's where it should start. Here's where it oftentimes starts. Middle of the night, four or five in the morning, asleep in the same bed. You don't know what you're surrounded. You don't know who's there. You're used to being alone. Then you're used to letting it fly whenever, especially when you're sort of under the cloak of sleep. You just let it fly. Yes, Drew?

14:02 Drew Adam, that's when you start showing your wife your worth. She told me you start fanning the sheets and stuff in the middle of the night.

14:10 Adam Oh, I'll tell you where we really got going is we're driving the car one day and I let a big blast go whilst I was operating the vehicle. And then I immediately started the fanning motion, the sort of cupping and the motion, you know, from the groin up to the face. And she was disgusted by this, by the way. And she said, I can't believe you're fanning it up toward your face. And I said, and I got really serious. I said, look, I'm operating a motor vehicle. You want me to tuck my head down between my legs while I'm driving? Use your head, woman. Please start thinking I could take us right into a tree. And she was like she was stunned for a moment, like, oh, my God, you don't even know what I'm talking about. But I had to start laughing at a at a certain point. All right. So, Drew, I still don't understand what your angle is. I say you you better get it in by week five.

15:06 Drew Start.

15:07 Adam Start at week five. And I know your angle now. Yes. You're saying it gets weird if you go farther than 10 weeks.

15:13 Drew Right. You're never going to do it. If you if 10 weeks pass, you ain't never going to do it.

15:17 Caller See, I think the expression break the ice originated as break the wind. Oh, really? I think that's when you really do just say, all right, the gloves are off. This is officially a relationship.

15:28 Right.

15:28 Adam Right. Yes. You mean enough for me to break when around you or possibly on you in the direction of Becky?

15:36 Yes.

15:37 Adam You're 22.

15:38 Caller Yes.

15:39 Adam What's up?

15:40 Caller Well, I got married a little over a year ago, and I had a baby eight months ago. And really, ever since I got pregnant, I haven't had the desire to have sex with my husband. And I'm not really sure why. And it's been ever since I got pregnant and now even afterwards.

16:01 Drew In fact, it's no, it's actually very, very common, Becky, for up to that first year after pregnancy for multiple reasons. One is people still breastfeed. That can affect sex drive. People get depressed. Women get depressed. That can affect sex driving. Just the hormonal changes of going from pregnant to non-pregnant. Many women feel a drop in libido and then add in the stress of trying to child rear. Of course, it's it's not top of mind all the time.

16:26 Caller Right. Do you have any suggestions on what I could do to?

16:31 Drew Are you menstruating normally?

16:34 Caller Yes, I am.

16:34 Drew Are you breastfeeding?

16:37 Caller Well, I was until my daughter was about four months old and then I stopped because I had to stop producing.

16:42 Drew Are you on any medication?

16:45 Caller No, nothing.

16:46 Drew Then one of the things that they will do is put you on the birth control pill.

16:50 Caller Well, I was on the birth control pill, but I started to get really, really, really bad headaches. And I said it was because my estrogen level was too high, so I had to be off of birth control.

16:59 Drew Did that help while you were on the pill?

17:02 Caller Being able to have sex? Yes, it did.

17:04 Drew Yeah, so you...

17:05 Adam Drew, I'm going to start spotting if this goes on.

17:08 Drew Yeah.

17:08 Adam I can feel it. Hey, Becky.

17:12 Caller Yes.

17:12 Adam When did your husband start farting around you?

17:16 Caller Like probably two weeks after we started dating. He's very comfortable with his farting, so...

17:22 Drew And by the way, women, as much fun as men have with it, women are not exactly enamored and impressed with this behavior.

17:30 Adam No, they're not. Yeah, they wouldn't know it. You know what it's sort of like? It's really almost the equivalent to a woman's period in which if we were dating a woman and we're with her for two years and never saw a tampon or maxi pad, we wouldn't ask any questions. Like, hey, what's going on with the menses, sweetie pea? It'd just be like, whatever, she doesn't do it. We wouldn't care if she was getting, you know, cancer and her uterus was going to drop out like a truck transmission. It just wouldn't matter. It'd be like, she's not doing it. Like, I mean, Drew, you're a doctor. Maybe you'd start sniffing around down there. But me, if I never saw the woman do a number two or put a tampon in or do anything like that, I would not ask any questions for the entirety of the relationship. I would just assume she doesn't have a menstrual period and she doesn't do number two. And I'm fine with that. Not sure if she has an anus. Like to find out.

18:26 Caller Yeah, I was going to say, you would have already found out at this point.

18:29 Adam Oh, yeah. Who were the hot chicks on the Australia one?

18:35 Caller We had Amber, the little cutie.

18:36 Adam Oh, yeah.

18:37 Caller And Elizabeth, the girl that's on the host of The View now.

18:39 Adam Yeah. Smoking.

18:41 Caller Yeah.

18:42 Adam Yeah. You seem naked. You got to see something at some point, don't you?

18:46 Caller You would think there would be a payoff at some point.

18:48 Adam Where does everyone go the bathroom?

18:51 Caller Wherever you can find a bush. Well, the main thing is you don't have to go to the bathroom. You don't need to go to the restroom.

18:56 Adam Well, it's an interesting point. You're not eating.

18:58 Caller No, you're not putting anything in.

19:00 Adam So if you're not putting anything in, how often are you making?

19:05 Caller Well, in Australia, the first I actually held out the longest, not by not because I wanted to. But that's just the way nature worked. And it was day 15 was the first.

19:15 Adam True. Do you hear that?

19:16 Caller And you know, the big deal is we're not giving toilet paper. But trust me, you don't need it. It's really. Yeah, you don't need it. Your body uses every calorie you put in it just drops out like a biscuit.

19:28 Adam Yeah. Hit it with a hockey stick and send it into the ocean.

19:31 When you're ready, your body let you know.

19:32 Caller And then it's over and you go back to camp.

19:35 Adam You know, that's an interesting point, which is, you know, if everybody just eating like maniacs now, it's got to be a lot of extra Duke going around. You know what I'm saying?

19:45 Drew How about that?

19:46 Adam Think about that, buddy.

19:47 Drew Yeah, good times.

19:50 Adam Fifteen days.

19:52 Caller Fifteen days. And wasn't constipated. Didn't even feel like I managed to fart though.

19:58 Adam Any good farts?

19:59 Caller Not that I recall.

20:00 Adam Nothing good, nothing going on in the belly.

20:03 Caller Nothing.

20:03 Adam How much did you weigh when you started?

20:05 Caller I lost 30, I lost 33 pounds, I think, in 42 days. And I went in at six and a half percent body fat. I was training for a marathon when I got the call.

20:14 Drew Jerry was telling us that they refed you in a very dangerous way.

20:18 Adam They shoved a pot roast up his ass.

20:21 Caller Yeah, what do you mean by that? You mean after the game, Drew?

20:23 Drew After, they basically gave you free access to everything you could possibly eat. That is extremely dangerous.

20:29 Caller It is, and it is so hard on the system, on the body system.

20:32 Drew Jerry described how she got edema and she had all these electrolyte problems. People can die from that. It's crazy.

20:38 Adam What should you do, Drew, if you haven't, you know, you've been out on a raft for a month and you haven't eaten anything but, you know, sea turtle egg or something?

20:48 Drew They have to introduce, you know, I'm no expert in this, but I know you have to introduce calories and proteins in a systematic and slow way. People's phosphates drop out, their potassium drops, they can have cardiac arrhythmias, it can be really quite serious.

21:00 Caller In the defense of the medical staff that Survivor has, they educate you about all of that, Drew, and they give you two options. They can say, this is what you should do, and here's what we're aware that you're probably going to do.

21:16 Drew But they should be monitoring your blood every day if that's what's going to happen, though.

21:21 Caller No, I mean, it's basically there at your disposal. And because of a lack of discipline, you know, when you're without for that long, you just absolutely just mow through everything that's on the table. And you get sick. And I mean, it's obviously after being on All Stars, we've done it twice now. You do the same thing both times. I mean, you just eat and eat and you get sick and you spend half your day in the bathroom. And then you finally, after about a week, your body gets over it.

21:44 Adam What about? Well, maybe they shouldn't drop you off at the Shakey's, though. Maybe they should have they, you know, they shouldn't have Mojo's at your disposal. Like, I mean, obviously, anyone who's been deprived this long is just going to go, you know, going to go sick on whatever whatever's put in front of them. Maybe they should say, look, we're going to start introducing this. It's for your own good. Look, it is part of Survivor.

22:09 Caller I mean, I think Drew needs to put a call in to the powers that be over at CBS then, because because you're right.

22:14 Adam I mean, it's it's available because you're in front of you, because you'll go you want. So you'll go from the you'll go back to the hotel essentially. Or where do you where?

22:25 Caller It depends on where where the series is taking place, where the game is. You know, determines what kind of accommodations you have. It's certainly not the four seasons by any stretch of the imagination, but it's not as brutal as the game itself. So you have food, you have a place to shower and you have a place to sleep.

22:42 Adam And once once you're back and you're a civilian now, you're just on your own. Eat what you want, do what you want.

22:50 Caller Right.

22:51 Adam Watch a little spectra vision and go to town. That's right. Colby's bill must have been like seventy five hundred dollars the first three and a half days he was back.

23:00 Caller Yeah, I had CBS's credit card, I think.

23:02 Adam So I just said, all right, Papa Bear, you got to get the get the all day pass. You know, the good thing is, is when when Jimmy and I used to travel back in the day, we figured out we could we could get past the spectra vision thing. If Jimmy brought some needle nose pliers and we undid the cable in back of the spectra vision box and plugged it directly into the TV set. And then we brought a universal remote. OK, the universal remote, which you can do with the universal remote is get the TV on to the channels that the old remote wasn't programmed to put it on to. So we would bring the universal remote and we were breaking the needle nose pliers and like MacGyver with a boner, we would figure this whole thing out. We get it set up. But then the problem is, is whoever had the universal remote could watch TV. The other guy would just have it set on the porn station. And then the other guy would take the universal remote and go back to his room. So you had 20. You could not watch anything but porn. Or if you switch the channel, you'd never get it back.

24:04 Caller Well, that was going to be my question. When you were talking about Jimmy doing this with his needle nose pliers, I'm thinking, are you guys in the same room watching porn? Because that brings up a whole nother topic.

24:12 Adam How dare you?

24:14 Caller How dare you?

24:15 Adam He who dumps with strangers attacks me, Drew. Do you hear this?

24:19 Caller I hear it.

24:21 Adam All right, we'll take ourselves a quick break. Colby from Survivor. Oh, what a show. Huge fan. Tomorrow night, by the way, Thursday night on CBS. Eight o'clock. Take a quick break. We'll be right back.

24:38 Caller Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

25:03 Adam That's Dr. Drew over there in Syracuse. Colby here tonight, everybody.

25:09 Caller What is up?

25:10 Adam He, of course, is from Survivor Australia and then Survivor All-Stars, arguably the most famous of the Survivors. I'd say Rupert is up there, and there's a handful, Rudy. Well, yeah, I like Rudy, but Rudy went so early on the All-Star, right?

25:32 Caller Yeah, but he's such a favorite. I mean, he's the oldest man or woman to go through. He's an old Navy SEAL. He's codgery. You just gotta love him.

25:40 Adam He's a salty racist. All right, so that's Thursday night, it's eight o'clock. I do my Survivor dance at the beginning. I'm up on my feet, no doubt about it. All right, let's talk to Roger who saw you on Curb Your Enthusiasm, which is another one of my favorite shows and I thought you're great on it. Oh, thank you. Roger?

26:08 Caller That was the most incredible episode that I've ever seen. I mean, that's one of my favorite shows anyway, but when Colby was on it, just the premise and his acting on it, like, you know, how arrogant he acted, it was just amazing. So I just want to compliment you on that.

26:21 Adam Just for those people who didn't catch that episode, they were, what's his name?

26:29 Caller Larry.

26:29 Adam Larry David was talking to his rabbi and he said that he wanted to bring somebody to his party and that he was a survivor. And I think Larry David thought he meant of the Holocaust, of course. And then when they, and he said, well, I'll bring my cousin Saul because he's a survivor as well, and they'll have something to talk about. And when he introduces Colby, he's like, yeah, this Colby from Survivor. And of course, cousin Saul is offended that he's known as his survivor. And then Colby proceeds to explain to him how difficult it was living on the continent.

27:05 Caller And yeah, the best part was the dinner time conversation where they're arguing who the real survivor was. Yeah.

27:12 Caller Well, thank you very much. Awesome. It was cool. Well, and so I got to ask you, Adam.

27:16 Adam Yes.

27:17 Caller Did you take offense to that, the premise of that episode and all of that in any way?

27:21 Adam No. You mean with all the survivor holocaust? That's right.

27:26 Caller Because it was about the holocaust and everything.

27:27 Adam No. Well, A, although I'm often mistaken for a Jew, I'm not one. I apologize. Although I wish I was because I believe those people have it together. Drew's half a Jew, but he hates that side of himself, so he has no opinion on this. No, you know, there's nobody, nobody likes to laugh like the Jews. I mean, really, let's be honest, I know it's a stereotype that, oh, they're all the writers and the comedians and all the producers. They are. That's what they like. That's what they... Look, that's their culture. It's not Cambodians who are the great comedy writers of our time, it's the Jews. And that was written by Jews for Jews, essentially.

28:11 Caller And in the audition, I went in with Larry David. There was a little bit of backlash.

28:16 Drew If you remember, Adam, we had a Holocaust situation of our own.

28:19 Adam We did?

28:23 Drew All right.

28:24 Adam Yeah. Listen to this. Bring. Bring. Oh, wait. We got to set this up. All right. Hold on a second. All right. Well, okay. Now I don't even know what to... I'm so excited. Colby. First off, okay, I'm going to tell you about our Holocaust situation, but tell me about going in and reading with Larry David.

28:41 Caller Well, that was the whole thing. You know, most people know, and for those that don't, it is... Curb Your Enthusiasm is unscripted. So it's basically a premise and a storyline, and then you just let it roll. And when you go in and audition, I went in with a bunch of actors, and when we go in, they tell us the premise, and this is what it is, and this is why it's going to be funny. And I was actually playing a fictitious character from a fictitious season of Survivor. I didn't go in as myself. Oh, I guess you weren't. I was this guy named Steve from some other series or whatever.

29:13 Adam And why weren't you allowed to be you from Australia?

29:17 Caller Well, ultimately, I was. But when they were casting it, they were pulling in all these actors, and they didn't know who was going to get the part.

29:26 Adam I thought I was going to have to stop smoking pot because I was like, I saw that episode, I said Colby from Survivor.

29:32 Caller That's right. That was a change. Actually, we shot it initially as this character named Steve. And then Larry called and we went back and dubbed over my name because he said, this is ridiculous. Everyone knows who you are from the show. It just doesn't make sense. But my point is I went in and Larry is there in the casting office explaining the premise. And my logic was, well, if it's OK with him, you know, he's Jewish. If it's OK with him, then we're good to go.

30:00 Adam And so I didn't hear what we call a goyum pond in the game of Judaism. Yes, sir.

30:07 Drew Whatever.

30:07 Adam OK, here's here's. OK, so we have our own story. But I got to see, you know, the other thing, too, that I was I was watching Colby did such a great job on the show. And it's tough, especially in amongst these great comedic actors, not only holding your own, but really being reviewed favorably to these to these people. And and I thought, wow, this guy's not an actor. I mean, he's on Survivor, but that's that's not acting. And I'm sure he's he's a smart enough guy. But most guys, you know, when they when they come on these sitcoms, where there's an athlete or somebody of note, they come on sitcom, they look stiff as a board. The fact that it wasn't scripted, I mean, the fact that you had you had your beats, you had the stuff you wanted to say, but you weren't trying to memorize actual verbatim dialogue probably helped you be as realistic as you were.

31:00 Caller Yeah. Well, I think I think you're right. And it was weird because you're right. It was it was intimidating to get in there with these guys that have this inherent chemistry and and and trying to fit in real quickly. But, you know, I was talking with Probst about it afterwards. And he said, isn't it hard to go in and play yourself? Because, you know, I was making up stuff, but I was playing myself. And then I took it. Is Gary the caller, the caller that called in?

31:26 Adam Oh, who the hell?

31:28 Caller Anyway, what he was saying, Roger, you know, about me being arrogant. I mean, that's what was fun was to take it so far over the top and be so ridiculous about how I truly believe my experience was more difficult than the survivors. So it's kind of weird because you go in and out of reality and fiction and all of that sort of thing.

31:45 Adam Hey, our Holocaust story is.

31:48 Caller Yeah, give me this.

31:49 Adam I'll be fast about it, but we got it. We got into trouble as well. People very touchy about the subject. We had a phone sex operator call on the show. Man, must have been a couple of years ago. And she said, you know, my problem is, is I'm so good with my customers on the other line, they orgasm too quickly. I don't keep them on the phone long enough and I don't make enough money. So I said, one of the things I said is that you phone sex operators overdo it a little too much. It's like, who are you? Well, you know, I'm from I'm from Sweden. I'm exchange student. I'm six foot. I got I got double D's and I gotta go. So don't overdo it. You know what? You know what you should be saying is, look, I got a rack that won't quit.

32:31 Drew I'm not going to lie to you.

32:32 Adam I got a little extra meat on the ass, but it looks good naked and beautiful blue eyes. You know, just enough to sort of keep you in there, you know, because what supermodel would actually be doing, you know, the one eight hundred, you know, a cornhole line, you know? You know what I mean? How hot are you going to be when you're, you know, I can hear the wind blowing the tin siding on your trailer.

32:55 Drew You were suggesting that you use subliminal messages.

32:58 Adam Yeah, I said I said to her, you know what you need to do? Use subliminal messages. So it's like you go, oh, baby, you sound hot cancer. I really want to get to know you of narrow disease and just and just tuck it in there. And if the guy won't even know what you're saying, that's going to just kill his wood enough to stretch it out for 10 or 15 minutes and make some money. So I suggested bringing up the Holocaust in a subliminal way in order, again, like just to just to kill, just to just to stretch it out a little bit. And well, here's here's how it went.

33:31 Drew Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. And then and then you went to Holocaust and she was like, I hadn't really heard of the Holocaust.

33:39 Adam Yeah. But that that in my mind meant she was a little bit hotter. Patrick would have known about it. And and she didn't know what subliminal was either. I think we had explained both those concepts. But now is this set up enough to play that clip?

33:56 Drew Yeah, but you have to tell me. Tom Arnold was the guest.

33:59 Adam Yes. All right. Anderson, why don't you just roll that thing? See if it works.

34:04 Caller So this is all you. You're making me play it right now, right?

34:07 Adam I don't know what's going on now.

34:09 Drew Because I don't want to get in trouble for playing it.

34:10 Adam Are you cut off over there or something? What's going on?

34:14 Drew No, I'm waiting to hear the clip. Can you guys hear me?

34:16 Adam I'm waiting to hear the clip too. Is Anderson there?

34:18 Drew I guess my mic's not working. All right. Not with me.

34:21 Adam It's not with me either. Bring.

34:24 Drew Here we go.

34:25 Adam Bring. What's your name? I'm Ace. Yeah. What are you wearing?

34:34 Well, I'm wearing a nice black garter.

34:45 Adam So I want her just to work it in subliminally. And she went ahead and she she went ahead and just screamed it out. Basically, she she worked it into her sexy talk.

34:55 Drew And that's where the trouble came. She had no idea what it meant.

34:59 Caller Yeah.

35:02 Adam Let's see. Drew.

35:04 Drew Yep.

35:05 Adam Somebody saw you on the real world, by the way.

35:09 Drew Yeah.

35:10 Adam So you want to talk to them? Whatever.

35:12 Drew All right.

35:13 Adam Carrie. 25.

35:16 Yes, I am.

35:17 Adam Saw Drew on the real world.

35:18 I saw Dr. Drew on the real world. And I live in California and I'm going through a divorce with my ex-husband and I lost my insurance and I want to stop cutting. And I have no resources to get to.

35:31 Adam You're cutting on yourself?

35:33 Yes, I am. I've been doing it since I was 16.

35:35 Drew How old are you now?

35:37 I'm 25.

35:38 Drew And what kind of treatments have you had?

35:40 I'm on antidepressants and Vanax right now.

35:44 Drew And who's prescribing that?

35:45 My psychiatrist.

35:48 Drew And so you are getting treatment.

35:49 Well, yes, but now the treatments run out and I have no resources to go to since I have no insurance and I have no money to pay for the thirteen hundred dollars a day to get to the treatment. And I was wondering if there's anything.

36:02 Drew Thirteen hundred dollars a day for treatment?

36:04 Yes. And that's for the nearest place. And I can't find any place that it will take people without insurance because it's obviously it's getting worse. I made 26 cuts within the past week.

36:17 Drew Are you dissociative when you do that?

36:18 No, I just I get angry and frustrated and I feel like I'm trapped in a box and I start cutting.

36:24 Drew But when you're cutting, you're not sort of dissociated and checked out. You're just sort of angry.

36:28 No, I'm angry and I'm upset.

36:31 Adam Well, wait a minute. You say $1,300 for the closest treatment. What does that mean?

36:37 It means that I'd have to pay them $1,300 a day and I can't leave until they say I can.

36:43 Adam Oh, you mean if you checked into a mental institution?

36:49 Yeah. I know that there is like, there's 1-800. The 1-800 don't cut, but that's in Chicago. And obviously with the financial situation I'm in, I can't really afford to fly to Chicago either.

37:04 Drew Yeah, but look, first of all, it's not $1,300 to stay in a psychiatric hospital. Secondly, unless you are actively trying to harm yourself or somebody else, all psychiatric hospitals are voluntary. So it's not as though you couldn't leave if you wanted to. The fact, though, is you probably are not going to have access to inpatient treatment, but there are plenty of county mental health facilities available. You're going to have to access that system.

37:30 Okay, because I've been through numerous therapists and they're just like, oh, we can't handle it, we can't handle it. It creeps them out. And I've just, I'm tired. Sometimes I'm tired of fighting and it makes me want to give up. I looked up ways to, I was looking up ways to mess myself up pretty bad without cutting on the internet the other night.

37:50 Adam You mean like kill yourself?

37:52 Well, yeah, but I started talking to my boyfriend and I, it was the same night that I cut and I drove out to his house and...

38:00 Adam Well, look, hold on a second. I'm going to inspire you, Carrie. What, first off, why did you break up with your boyfriend and who dumped who and do you want him back?

38:08 I didn't break up with my boyfriend. I'm in the process of getting a divorce. The divorce has been dragging on, it's been almost 18 months because my ex-husband had a marriage settlement agreement that his lawyer messed up a couple of times and it's just been a long, drawn out process.

38:27 Adam All right, what are you doing? Do you work? Do you do anything?

38:29 Right now I got put on temporary disability by my doctor because of the visibility of my scars and she's worried about my mental health getting worse since it has been, since I've been seeing my psychiatrist and my doctor since I moved back up to where I am right now.

38:45 Adam What happened? Were you abused? Is a child raped, beaten?

38:50 Drew All of that.

38:52 I was sexually assaulted when I was 17 by a classmate of mine. I wasn't raped.

38:57 Adam Nah, that's not it. We're going for before that.

39:01 There was always a suspicion that my father sexually abused me when I was a kid, but because I can't dig up unrepressed memories, it's just kind of like flashes.

39:11 Adam All right, hold on one second. Hold on, hold on. Drew, we don't have too much time, but let me say this about Carrie. I'm a lay person, but a genius lay person, at least self-proclaimed genius lay person. Carrie seems to intellectually understand what's going on. She's not one of the people who doesn't really, you know, can't process information.

39:34 Drew No, she has what's called a borderline personality disorder.

39:37 Adam Okay.

39:37 Drew And that is that feeling, so you get the hostility and that it's helping if you can, but she won't let you help her.

39:43 Adam I don't have, yeah, but what I mean is, is there, yes, there's angry, there's anger just under the hurt or maybe hurt just under the anger. Whatever it is, they've been through the process enough to sort of intellectually understand what's going on, yet have a fast answer for every suggestion you have for them to rectify the problem that they seem, they seem to want it rectified more than anything, but yet there's another side of them that's not going to hear anything about rectifying it.

40:16 Drew That's right, because it would have to give up the charade that the external world is the reason that things are so out of control.

40:23 Adam Right, so a couple of questions, just on the sort of basic morbid human side, are there certain people that just, they don't want to get well? They're not going to get well? It's almost safe or comfortable or familiar where they are?

40:38 Drew Well, there absolutely is that and that's really sort of the foundation of personality disorder, is that somebody doesn't want to take on introspection in an emotional way and to look at their role in the circumstances of their life. They want it to be, it's less painful for it to be the world doing it to them.

40:54 Adam Right, and what if you, now obviously you can't tell someone like Carrie, look, how about you, you know, you go to your therapist, you take your medicines, how about you start listening to classical music and doing exercise and going on long walks and not, you know, watching nine hours of TV a day. Can you do any of that stuff? Is she going to?

41:15 Drew It's all good, but it's like Dr. Phil's platitudes, it's like, well, you just got to stop cutting, you got to make up your mind to stop doing it. The fact is when they do this...

41:21 Adam I love Dr. Phil, how dare you, Drew.

41:24 Drew When they do that, when they do the cutting, they're in sort of dissociative states, they're not in their right normal mind, they're sort of in a, you know, sort of altered when they do it, and it sort of helps them manage their feelings when they're in that sort of altered arousal state that the cutting actually causes. It's like an addiction, it's very much like they need structure, 12-step can help, being around people, connecting with people.

41:45 Adam 12-step, she doesn't have any money, can she go to something A?

41:49 Drew There's Emotions Anonymous, I believe there's Cutters Anonymous too.

41:52 Adam All right, Carrie.

41:55 I have been in treatment and I do take my medication.

41:57 Adam Okay, so...

41:58 I was listening to you the whole time going, but I called because I want the help and I am taking my medication.

42:04 Adam I know, but you want a kind of help that we can't really provide, I mean, unless we go over there and drop off a suitcase of money earmarked for...

42:12 No, no, no, no, I'm not asking for anything like that, I'm just asking for like, you know, if there's like a cutters anonymous or some place I can go to get help because I can't do this anymore. I don't want to do it anymore.

42:24 Drew What was this? Just to make sure you're listening, what was the suggestion I gave you about five minutes ago? Oh. I know, Colby knows. There are county mental health services that will continue to...

42:40 I know that there's county mental health services.

42:42 Drew That will continue to prescribe your medication. You can seek out 12-Step. There's Emotions Anonymous. And there are people with similar kinds of personality, with certain kinds of trauma issues as yours. You can go to EA. You go to county mental health services. And you look for services through county mental health that are available on a group process. And you keep people around you who care about you and who can help sort of contain the behaviors a little bit.

43:04 Adam Colby started cutting on himself. He got so depressed.

43:07 Drew I know.

43:07 Adam We're going to take a break.

43:09 Drew And farting.

43:09 Adam We're going to go down the hall. We're going to rape the snack machine. Colby still got a bad thing from the island.

43:17 Caller Yeah, suffering.

43:18 Adam We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

43:20 Caller Loveline, 1-800-LOVE-191.

43:43 Adam That's Dr. Drew over there in a Swago or some...

43:48 Caller Syracuse.

43:49 Adam Whatever. Colby here tonight from Survivor.

43:51 Caller Hello.

43:52 Adam Biggest name in Survivor, everybody. Best show on TV. 8 o'clock, CBS on Thursday nights. Also, I got to give a quick plug, Drew, something for you to do Saturday night at the Italian American Film Festival at the Arclight Theater in Hollywood. We're going to be showing a Windy City Heat, showing at about 8 or 8.30. So that's one of the greatest comedy movies ever made. I'm in it. I know that you can catch them all. I know that you can catch them all.

44:36 Caller I know that you can catch them all.

44:43 Adam I know that you can catch them all. I know that you can catch them all. I know that you can catch them all.

44:47 Caller Good to talk to you, man.

44:48 Caller That was a good time.

44:49 Caller Well, Donaldson is missing. This is how much he wanted to do the show with you guys. He is missing the Wednesday Night Poker Game with Shannon Elizabeth and to get Donaldson away from Shannon required Loveline.

45:05 Adam We are the flat bar that pride you away from Shannon Elizabeth.

45:07 Caller I actually showed up. I went early. We played a couple of hands and I said, guys, I got to go. I bailed out. I lost a quick bill. How are you doing tonight, Propes?

45:17 Caller I'm all right, actually. I got a little cash in my pocket.

45:20 Caller Nice.

45:21 Adam Jeff, is there some sort of, I don't know, a host survivor confidentiality agreement that you're screwing with by playing cards with the survivor members?

45:32 Caller You know, eight seasons in, Adam, it's all out the window. But it's all good. We're good. I don't tell Donaldson anything. He was out so soon. He brought so little game this time.

45:46 Caller Thanks.

45:47 Adam Oh, was he on this year? He was on this season. He was on the All-Star one, was he? I didn't see that.

45:54 Caller I was actually part of the crew. Yeah, I didn't actually play the game this time.

45:58 Adam Well, you know, the thing, actually, the thing I, what we learned from talking to Jeff is surprisingly, there's survivors he never wants to see again, which would probably be 90 percent of them. And then there's Colby, I guess, and a handful of others, I guess, as well. Yeah, a handful of others.

46:16 Caller No, there, I mean, I think also we were saying, in all honesty, because now I'll get 50 emails saying I was dogging people again. But it's the same as, you know, you haven't guessed on, you guys haven't guessed on, probably every so often you hit it off with somebody, you might become friends. But most people who are on the show, they're a guest, and that's it.

46:35 Adam I already gave Colby a handy out in the parking lot when I had to look at the car, to be honest, in order to really be motivated.

46:43 Caller All right.

46:44 Adam Hey, Jeff, we got to take a break. Can you just you just call in to say hi. I don't want to feel stupid putting you on hold for five minutes.

46:52 Caller We'll wait and hang out. We're we're we're just listening to the show.

46:55 Caller Are you taking Shannon's money? Please tell me she's not winning.

46:58 Adam Well, hold on. Hold on a second. And then we and then we'll put her on the phone because she's got to come on this show as well. Colby here from Survivor. Jeff, perhaps the host of Survivor on hold. We'll take quick break. We'll be right back.

47:10 Caller Here it is.

47:11 Adam Bottom line, it sucks being single today.

47:13 Drew Tons of lame people and no decent prospects.

47:16 Caller Call the Dateline.

47:18 Caller 1-877-889-DATE.

47:24 Caller Loveline will be right back.

47:25 Caller So get your problems ready.

47:54 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew over in Bum F. It's Colby here tonight from Survivor.

48:06 Caller Yeah, a dismal clap.

48:08 Adam Got off, did the Australian, and now off the All-Star. Jeff Probst, of course, the biggest survivor of them all is on the line. Colby playing cards with Jeff. Jeff?

48:21 Caller I just won a huge hand during the commercial.

48:23 Caller Oh, you guys played a whole round. Okay, now I'm missing it.

48:26 Caller Yes, we did.

48:27 Adam Now, what do you play?

48:29 Caller We play a lot of junk games. You know, in Los Angeles now, there's this Texas Hold'em elitism that that's like, you know, all these guys play, but we play all the, you know, between the sheets in 727 and F Your Neighbor and, you know, any other good game.

48:47 Adam You know, it's nice every once in a while is a round of guts.

48:50 Caller Guts is always good.

48:52 Caller I actually caught a round of guts before I left to come over here.

48:55 Adam Guts is nice.

48:56 Caller And we play Texas Hold'em. We play it all. It's dealer choice. So you get to play whatever you want.

49:00 Adam Little night baseball or black anaconda can be fun.

49:05 Caller Threes, you got to pay the pot if you want the threes.

49:08 Adam Yeah. Yeah. Now who do you have? You got a big celebrity game. You got you, Jeff. You got Shannon Elizabeth. You got Colby.

49:16 Caller Yeah. And a couple other actors are in here usually, but tonight it's just Miss Elizabeth who's dying to get on the phone and talk to about Donald.

49:25 Caller She's the token female. She's the only estrogen we allow in the house, but it's because she's so damn good at cards.

49:31 Adam She needs to come on this show. Put her on the phone. All right.

49:34 Caller Hold on. Here she is.

49:35 Adam Thank you. This is great.

49:37 Caller Hey.

49:38 Adam Hey, Shannon.

49:39 Caller Hey.

49:40 Adam Shannon Elizabeth, everybody. What's happening, baby doll?

49:44 Can I just say Jeff doesn't like Texas Hold'em because he always loses at it. He's not good at it.

49:48 Adam Well, I mean, that's kind of how it is with with cards. Whatever one you happen to win at it becomes coincidentally your favorite game.

49:55 Caller For the record, Shannon comes into the game tonight with both guns blazing, starts betting rounds of cards. We're all looking at each other going, who hit the lottery? What is she doing?

50:05 She's like, well, I'm so excited. I wish you were here. So I was taking your money, Colby.

50:09 Caller Are you winning?

50:09 I'm winning. Everyone is down. That hand that Jeff just won, I dropped out of early, so I didn't lose anything.

50:16 Caller Oh, so now you're playing charity. What is this all about?

50:19 What do you mean?

50:19 Adam And what do you guys?

50:21 I didn't have anything. I dropped out of it.

50:22 Adam You dropped out. You got it. You know, there's that Kenny Rogers song that explains the game in great detail. That's right.

50:30 That's right.

50:31 Adam So Shannon, when are you coming on this show?

50:33 You know, I don't have anything going on right now. I don't know.

50:37 Adam Well, don't you got a movie out?

50:39 Yeah, but I'm done with promotion for that.

50:41 Adam Oh, all right. Well, you know, you can come on just to hang out.

50:46 It's not always my call, but I would love to.

50:49 Adam All right. I'll tell you, we're going to we're going to hold you to that, even though I'm not sure what it was.

50:55 And can I just say, can I can I give you guys a little something on Colby?

50:59 Adam Yes, please, Shannon.

51:00 Caller Wait, hold on. We're live here. So don't don't convict me.

51:06 He is he is our Martha Stewart.

51:09 Adam Oh, really?

51:10 He cooks for us every week, brings over the best chili. And he did not make it tonight because of you guys. And we're very bitter and we're hungry. So, yeah, I expect him to come back here with pizza afterwards.

51:22 Adam He brought a seven layer dip into the studio. That's delightful.

51:26 Have you guys tasted his water, by the way?

51:29 Adam His what?

51:30 Drew His water?

51:31 Adam Oh, his water. Oh, his alleged water is Big Gulp, which is nothing but the Kamchatka and Gatorade. Yes, I'm sure there's booze in there.

51:40 Caller Thanks, Shannon.

51:41 Adam This kid's got a problem.

51:43 Caller Hey, I just want to make sure you guys are still going to be on the table when we wrap up here, because I'm coming back to take your money.

51:48 Oh, we're so well, at least I'm here. Everybody else might be broke, but I'm here.

51:52 Caller Yeah, I'm not.

51:54 This might be the first night I walk away with some cash, though.

51:57 Caller Yeah, that's the truth, Adam. She has really lost her butt.

52:00 Adam I bet you here's the thing. Here's my prediction. Once that pot brownie kicks in, probes is going to be out of there. Because it's really this is this is really a problem. This same problem. Well, Kimmel said this problem a time or two, which is you play you play cards. You get really baked and then you forget how to count. You're not sure what to do. You start laughing when you're supposed to have your poker face on. It's a horrible combination of drugs and it's not horrible if everyone's. Well, that's true. Here's the thing.

52:30 Caller Those of us that don't participate, though, that's right. You guys mess each other up.

52:35 Adam That's right. Like, like me. That's right. All right, Shannon. Well, God bless you.

52:41 Caller Shannon, do you have any problems that you would like Dr. Drew or Adam to, you know, help you out with? Come on. We got you on the phone.

52:51 Caller Well, what do I do when I'm in a poker game and there are guys that I like, but they, you know, they have girl alleged girlfriends and, you know, like, how do you do with that?

53:02 Adam It's got to be tough because there's some pretty hunky dudes at that table.

53:06 Caller You know, I mean, and probes got that buckskin choker on and other more than with any of the girls. It's such a weird thing.

53:14 Adam Yeah, it's got to be. That's got to be torture. It's all I can do to keep my hands off Colby myself sitting here in the studio.

53:22 Caller I know, I know.

53:24 Adam I mean, I feel sorry for Shannon, but some kindly gent will show pity on you and show you a night. I'm sure. I'm sure. Any day now.

53:35 Caller Well, if you guys ever want to come play poker with us, you know, we're here.

53:39 Caller Yeah, we do. We need to get Adam there one night.

53:41 Adam Well, yeah, Colby and I are going to do that thing at the end of the show where we exchange phone numbers and never call each other. But it's great. Yeah.

53:50 Caller Change like the email addresses and.

53:56 Caller Come on.

53:59 Adam Hey, so, Shannon, we're going to well, look, let's put it this way. The next time you have something to plug, which I guess will be relatively soon, you will come on our show and plug it. Yes.

54:11 Caller I will do my best.

54:13 Adam Thank you. Thank you for that half committed answer. Give our love to Jeff as well. By Shannon Elizabeth and Jeff Prose. Playing cards with the big boys. Colby here tonight from Survivor. We'll be getting back to that card game before the night is through. Jennifer. You're 23. You're four months pregnant. All right. And father died two weeks ago.

54:43 Drew The father of the child.

54:44 Yeah.

54:45 Drew What happened?

54:47 He had a drug overdose of everything you could possibly imagine.

54:52 Drew I'm so sorry.

54:55 But the thing is, he didn't tell his parents before he passed about the baby. And they found out through some people, I guess, that I'm not associated with. And they told the people they told his parents and they wouldn't allow me at the funeral or anything like that. So I was just wondering if I should just let it go and let them come around or if I should.

55:19 Adam Well, why wouldn't they? They wouldn't allow you at the funeral.

55:23 Yeah, because I guess they associated me with drugs, which I've I've never done a drug and I'm clean. And I guess, like they say, addicts hide everything.

55:31 Adam So you never is. So you're just with this guy was a full blown addict and you've never done drugs yourself?

55:38 No. And that's what that's what like I've known him for 12 years, but I didn't live here. I like moved away for a while and I came back and start hanging out and I didn't know he was like this.

55:51 Drew And so it still doesn't make sense why they wouldn't allow you at the funeral. You know, there's something missing.

55:56 No, that's they wouldn't allow me, my mom, my dad, none of my family to go. I don't know if they're trying to blame somebody for his own actions or what.

56:06 Drew You have another child, too.

56:07 Yeah.

56:09 Drew And that child's got to be like eight months old.

56:12 Yeah.

56:14 Drew Who's the father of that one?

56:16 He left me when he found out I was pregnant.

56:22 Adam When he found out you're pregnant with this other guy's kid? Oh, I see. All right, hold on a second. We have to convene. So I know what Drew's thinking. Drew's thinking, well, this is a tragedy, but yet there's more to it than meets the eye. She's not just some Pollyanna who's never actually even had a thimble full of alcohol in her life. She magically gets hooked up with some junkie and can't go to the funeral, even though she had a, you know, a bonding relationship with this guy. There's some denial. There's something. And then it starts to little things start to bleed out.

56:57 Caller She uses the phrase, I'm clean, which.

57:00 Adam Yeah, there's something going on. And then you hear the kid in the background. Now there's another guy and another kid. And it starts to, it comes unraveled a little bit. Doesn't mean these people aren't wrong. And by the way, can you stop somebody coming, you know, if, if, if you stop that, if coming to a funeral, your wife died or my wife died or your girlfriend died or Chris is a beanbag chair. He humps died. Engineer Chris, could the parents of the beanbag chair stop Chris from coming to the funeral? I don't think wild horses could stop this kid from attending that funeral. I'm just saying like you just go, no, I'm going to show up. I'm going to pay my respects. I, yeah, I don't know how that works. I don't know how it is is. I guess you're talking and they're saying, no, you can't find out that you weren't supposed to come even.

57:46 Well, okay. We showed up at the funeral home and where I guess people are supposed to exit, they had his name above it and where to hit the room where they had him, they had exit above the sign. So we went into the room that had his name above it ominous by the way. And they, the family, like his aunts and uncles stopped us, asked us our names, checked a list and they said that we were on the list so we could not come in.

58:10 Adam Oh, well, so in a way, in a way, yeah, you got to tip them. They're looking for a tip.

58:16 Caller You got to grease the funeral home.

58:18 Adam Yeah.

58:18 What we did.

58:23 Adam She doesn't know what that means. I just like the idea of you going, is it going to be an open casket? No, absolutely not. Maybe this will help open the caskala. That'll get a crack open. I'll get a crack and peel off another 20. We should be able to chalk it up about six inches. If you stick your face in there, you could probably see it if you had one of those pen-like flashlights. Maybe this will help get the casket just a little bit more open.

58:49 Caller It's great.

58:52 It's like the major D.

58:53 Jennifer? We, honestly, we talked to the funeral director. They were going to give us like our own time to mourn him. And then the family found out that he was going to let us and told them that absolutely not. So the funeral director came to my house and told me about what happened and brought me a bunch of the funeral flyers and everything. And that's all we got out of it.

59:15 Adam Jennifer.

59:15 Drew Still confused.

59:16 Adam Yeah. Here's the thing. And here's the problem. And I feel bad for you. And you know, you're pregnant with this guy's kid. This guy died a few weeks ago. There's still parts missing here and I'm not sure why. Had you had contact with the family before this?

59:32 Caller Um, I met him a couple times, but I'd only hung out with him by myself like twice.

59:37 Drew Was there a problem when you were there then with them?

59:39 Caller No, they were real nice. His mom's the principal of an elementary school. And I mean she was real nice and polite and that's what I don't get.

59:48 Adam And your past is you got a kid, you don't do drugs?

59:52 Caller No, I don't do anything. I'm a mother and I own my own business and that's what I do.

59:57 Adam You do what's that business, phone sacks?

1:00:00 Caller Yeah, right.

1:00:04 Drew Who's we?

1:00:07 Adam So this is a tragedy. I'm sorry for the way they handle it. I don't know, maybe they were just in such grief they couldn't see anybody that they reminded them of their son. Who the hell knows? And by the way, as a guy who's one of his best buddies smoked weed constantly and whose mom always assumed I was the guy who was forcing him to smoke the weed like, yeah, that's what I do. I take a big hit and then we'd French kiss and I would massage his lungs and blow it into it. Parents are, by the way, absolutely baddy about that kind of stuff. I mean, you know, your son's a junkie. He's hooked up with some chick who doesn't do drugs and you can still blame that person, anybody but your own. It is amazing the capacity of especially a mother to do that kind of stuff. Yeah, but anyway, so Jennifer, you're going to have his child?

1:00:58 Caller Yeah.

1:00:59 Adam All right. And yeah.

1:01:02 Caller I didn't know if I mean, it's just gone. I've gone through hell these past couple weeks to figure out.

1:01:08 Adam Jennifer, you want to know whether to tell the family?

1:01:11 Caller Well, the family found out through some of, I guess, his other friends that were able to go to the funeral and they like have made like no attempt. They said that they don't they told I've heard through the grapevine or whatever that they don't want to deal with the baby situation or any of that. So I was wondering if I should just let it go and just say, forget them. Or if I should try to get them into my child's life.

1:01:36 Drew Well, I would say not.

1:01:38 Adam No, I would I would say no. I would also say a couple of things. One, I don't know if the family is financially obliged to be involved with this. No, not at all. Jennifer says no, 11 times, actually.

1:01:54 Caller Jennifer, I have a question. Are you are you dating? Do you have a boyfriend now?

1:01:57 Caller No, no, I don't.

1:01:59 Adam Probably best. You're in Indiana. Colby be swinging through there. And that's a lie. So here's the thing, Jennifer, how about you give the kid up for adoption?

1:02:08 Caller I can't do that.

1:02:10 Adam Right.

1:02:12 Drew Why can't you?

1:02:13 Caller Because I would wonder all the time about it and wonder about it being with a worthwhile family.

1:02:18 Adam Assume he's doing better than than he is with you. And then it's it's easy. OK, all right. I just the idea that you're 23, you're trying to run a business, you have an eight month old, you're going to have another. Do you just have one kid so far? OK, there he is. OK, Jennifer, don't deal that. Look, if the if the family doesn't want you involved, then fine. They get by.

1:02:44 Drew Why is the child up at three in the morning?

1:02:48 Adam He watches Nightline.

1:02:49 Caller Drew, what do you think she ought to do?

1:02:52 Drew I think the child will have a much greater chance with an adoptive parent.

1:02:57 Adam Here's the thing.

1:02:57 Drew She's got chaos in her life. She's got she's busy trying to support another child. It just could you imagine at 23 having had two children?

1:03:05 Caller No, no. It's because I think you're right.

1:03:09 Adam Yeah. Plus, your ass would be like a dinner bell. I mean, just be like that triangle. I mean, imagine. Blown out. You know what I'm saying? I mean, as a guy. Right? Yeah. Here's the thing. Here's what Drew is responding to. Here's what I'm responding to. Our spidey sense is tingling. Security business with dad, cranked out a kid with another guy who's not in the picture, pregnant with this guy. Parents magically don't want her anywhere near the funeral. Much more to this and just a sort of general white trash demeanor. Much more to this than meets the eye. We talk to these people all the time. They're like, these are the same people when they're in high school. They're like, why did you get expelled? Principal doesn't like me. Right. That doesn't like you or you vandalize the cafeteria again. You know what I mean? And if you talk to them, unless you can talk to the principal, you'll never hear it. It's like according to them, they just got tossed out for no good reason. So I feel sorry for what Jennifer's going through. I bet there's more to it. Right. Then absolutely. All right. Let's talk to Jason, who's 18. Jason.

1:04:14 Caller Jason.

1:04:16 Yes.

1:04:17 Adam Jason, you're 18.

1:04:18 Caller You want to talk?

1:04:19 Adam What's up, buddy?

1:04:20 I was wondering, do you have to have a certificate to be a contractor for roofing?

1:04:26 Adam Well, yeah. You have to get a contractor's license if you want to be a legal contractor, but it doesn't mean you don't need one to work. Everyone works.

1:04:39 Yeah. I want to be a roofer, but I'm passing high school. I'm graduating in a couple months in the beginning of April.

1:04:49 Adam And you want to be a roofer.

1:04:52 A contractor.

1:04:52 Caller Is this the point in the show when your breadth of knowledge expands?

1:04:56 Adam This is really where I kick it into overdrive.

1:04:59 Caller Let me tell you, this came out of left field to me, but I know a little bit about your background, so that's why I'm asking.

1:05:04 Adam Roofing, you know, drywallers make fun of roofers. This is the, you know, this is the rodeo clown on the construction circuit. It is as low as it goes. I don't know why you would want to do this. Sitting up there with that tar pumper and the hot mop. You know what they do, Drew? They just, they, they take big blocks of solid tar, throw it into a kettle, heat it up, have it shoot through a hose into a five gallon bucket, hump that up a ladder, throw it on the roof and take just a basic kitchen mop that's dipped in that horrible tar. And you know how you drive past the roofing job when they're hot mopping and you roll the window up? You go, oh, this is horrible. I must've gotten 10 kinds of cancer going by. I was going 80. I got colon cancer. These guys are on the roof with it. You understand?

1:05:57 Drew All the time.

1:05:58 Adam Yeah. Jason, you don't want to be a roofer. Well, just and it's dangerous. It's dangerous. You understand? You fall off all the time.

1:06:07 Caller What about general construction?

1:06:09 Adam That that's that's better.

1:06:11 Caller Oh, but it's somewhat general.

1:06:14 Adam Yeah. I mean, hey, Jason.

1:06:18 Caller Yeah.

1:06:19 Adam Just get a job as a laborer and see how it goes.

1:06:23 Caller All right.

1:06:24 Adam All right, buddy. Hey, listen. Yeah, you can leave high school now, by the way. You have my permission. You don't need high school. You know, listen, I did construction for 13 years. They make fun of you for having a diploma.

1:06:38 Caller Well, yeah, you're overqualified.

1:06:40 Adam Yeah, you're stigmatized. It's like it's it's like being a it's like being a pedophile in the joint.

1:06:47 Caller I mean, I graduated college, went back home and I hauled beer on a beer truck, delivered beer. And those guys, those guys knocked me. I was working for Miller. Miller lied.

1:06:56 Adam You're driving the beer truck.

1:06:58 Caller Well, the whole thing. I was riding shotgun. I was slinging beer. But the cool thing is, is whenever you get what's called a quote unquote breakage, when like a 12 pack or a case falls out and busts open, you have an extra bay on the beer truck where you throw that. And at the end of the day, you get back to the warehouse and you unload all the breakage into a big cooler. And all the staff, you know, the drivers and the shotguns get to sit there and drink beer. So don't think for a second that I wouldn't drop in one out of five cases on the ground just to bust it open.

1:07:29 Adam And you know, the thing, you know, the thing strikes me about working in, you know, for, you know, delivering beer.

1:07:33 Drew By the way, give Colby my card, will you Adam?

1:07:36 Adam Yeah, I got your card.

1:07:40 Caller Where's my bourbon?

1:07:41 Adam The thing about beer is like, OK, here's the thing.

1:07:44 Caller It's in my big gulp.

1:07:45 Adam If you work at a ice cream parlor, you're going to get sick ice cream in the first two weeks.

1:07:50 Caller Sure.

1:07:50 Adam And you'll never want to see it again. And it's the same way with almost any any food place or anything. But beer beer, that's a way of life. I mean, you could you could work for a bottling place. You could deliver. I don't care what the brand was event. And you you you could drink it your entire life unless it was Mickey's Big Mouth.

1:08:07 Caller Well, that's just it. I mean, we've got at least 12, 13 different brands. So I break a different brand every day. I mean, it's called variety. It's the spice of life, baby.

1:08:15 Adam Shrewd. Colby here from Survivor, everybody. Favorite show. Let's take one more call before we go to break. This will be Dee Dee, who's 20. Dee Dee? What's your problem, baby doll?

1:08:33 Caller Well, I've been noticing probably for the last year, every single time that I have sex or masturbate, my clit just starts hurting really, really bad. And I can't have an orgasm anymore. And I'm taking a human sexuality class in college. And I read this, like, maybe two line thing where it said, Smeagma be a cause.

1:09:03 Adam Smeagma is a bad thing.

1:09:05 Drew No, no.

1:09:07 Adam Could be the guys. It turned out for me, my lady was my belt buckle that was causing the chafing. I started actually start taking my pants off, which was an inconvenience. But, you know, like in any relationship, there's sacrifices, you know. Drew, what? Now, Drew, define Smeagma, please.

1:09:27 Caller Yeah, what are you going to say?

1:09:29 Drew It's really more something that guys get. It's just accumulated debris and crevices and things. Why do you want medication?

1:09:35 Adam Hold on. It's sort of the cottage cheese that builds up at the end of the uncircumcised penis.

1:09:41 Caller Yeah, I know. It talks about being unclean. But it said that girls could have that problem.

1:09:47 Drew Are you wanting medication? Do you have any medical problems?

1:09:53 Caller No, not really.

1:09:55 Adam You're going to junior college?

1:09:58 Drew Ulcers where?

1:09:59 Caller In my stomach, but I mean, I don't have anything other than that.

1:10:04 Drew And you get irritation, so you can't continue stinging yourself.

1:10:07 Caller Yeah, it starts to hurt way too much to even consider it.

1:10:15 Adam Okay, why do you have ulcers?

1:10:17 Drew No piercings or anything?

1:10:19 Caller No, not down there.

1:10:23 Adam Sorry for bothering you with this question, but you understand it's getting late. We need answers. Hold on a second. First off, Dee Dee's calling from Bakersfield, which is... Wait, wait, wait.

1:10:34 Caller That's second call tonight from Bakersfield.

1:10:36 Adam It's hell by no trash over there.

1:10:38 Caller It is a problem-infested area.

1:10:39 Adam The world's dumbest white people.

1:10:41 Drew We just played Bakersfield.

1:10:42 Adam We're finding Bakersfield. And she's one of these chicks. Let me tell you something. She is not LA hot, but she's Bakersfield hot, which means she doesn't have nine kids and isn't fat as a goddamn Winnebago. So she's all full of her Bakersfield self because she's like, Cause I'm hot because I ain't fat and I don't have nine kids. I only have three kids. And I'm going to junior college. I ain't in juvenile hall like the rest of my friends. But so she's got an attitude. Dee Dee? OK, so let me get this straight. You're clitoris, or as my grandmother would say, clitoris. We've gotten to many arguments over this. Turns out you can pronounce it both ways. We had to look it up in the oversized print dictionary that my grandfather left behind before he died.

1:11:27 Caller What the hell? Just abbreviate clitoris.

1:11:28 Adam Very uncomfortable, yes. And it gets uncomfortable when you're having intercourse or when you're doing anything. I see. All right, Drew.

1:11:39 Drew Yeah.

1:11:40 Adam Any, could there be any, any, I don't know, do they change, do they grow, do they metamorphosize?

1:11:46 Drew No, I worry more about things like medication or drugs. That's really where that sort of thing gets going. You don't use drugs or alcohol.

1:11:54 Caller I drink and smoke pot occasionally, but I haven't smoked pot in a long time.

1:11:59 Drew But no, no history of heavy drug use of any type? And no birth control pill, no medication, no nothing? Listen, you need to have a pelvic exam to make sure there's not, I mean, there are all kinds of weird possibilities, even tumors and things in the spine.

1:12:21 Adam Yeah. All right. We'll take ourselves a little break. Colby here from Survivor. We'll be right back. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. He is in Syracuse tonight, be back in studio tomorrow night. Yes, Drew?

1:12:54 Drew Yes, Adam.

1:12:55 Adam All right, buddy, you getting a little tired?

1:12:58 Drew No.

1:12:59 Adam Okay, don't get defensive. Checking, you got up early this morning.

1:13:03 Drew I was looking out for you, buddy.

1:13:04 Adam I did.

1:13:04 Drew Did you wake up and think of me?

1:13:06 Adam No, no, I didn't. I told, you know, I was telling Drew had to get up about 445 LA time this morning after doing this show. I told him, one of my simple pleasures is to try to concentrate on those who have to get up at ungodly hours before I go to bed at 2, 2.30 with a little buzz usually, and try to wake up about the time they're gonna get up, but just enough to look at the clock, maybe break a little wind.

1:13:37 Caller Snicker a bit.

1:13:38 Adam Snicker a bit and then drop the head back onto the pillow and pull the comforter back over me. It makes, otherwise it's just sleeping. Sure. It's all relative. I mean, we must appreciate. Colby, someone did Survivor. I mean, the idea of just sleeping on a cot with a blanket and getting some cafeteria food, like junior high cafeteria food after two weeks, doing without what would have been heaven, right?

1:14:07 Caller And getting a full night's sleep.

1:14:09 Adam Full, I mean, the idea-

1:14:10 Caller A true full night's sleep.

1:14:11 Adam Prison bunk and a little army food would have been, I mean, you would have fought someone to the death for two weeks into this thing of just eating gruel and sleeping on the ground, yes?

1:14:25 Caller Right on.

1:14:26 Adam So it's very relative.

1:14:27 Caller Sure.

1:14:27 Adam Well, let me ask this.

1:14:28 Caller I can relate.

1:14:29 Adam Let me ask, are you right back to normal or do you still enjoy it when you climb into a cozy bed and have a hot meal? You know what I mean?

1:14:39 Caller You know, you do tend to come back and appreciate a lot more what you've been without. And that was, for me, part of the reason for going back and doing it again. Really? It really is that positive of an experience in the way that, you know, we all take things for granted, whether it's material items or those loved ones close to us that call us on a daily basis. And I remember the first time going in, excuse me, excuse me, when a crew member called me over to do an interview with one of the field producers and he said, CD, would you join us over here? My initials, CD. One of my best friends from Texas is the only one that's ever called me by my initials. And it wasn't until this guy that I didn't even know, because you're not allowed to visit with the crew, you're not allowed to even talk to those guys. It wasn't until this guy called me by my initials that I realized, you know, how much I missed a buddy of mine. I mean, this is just a close buddy from college. And that's when you really start to put things into perspective and realize how much the trivial and somewhat menial things that you think aren't that important in a daily basis. And when you're removed from those for an extended period of time, you realize how much they mean to you.

1:15:52 Adam You're right. Hey, let me just take a second here. Hey, Drew.

1:15:55 Caller It's coming.

1:15:56 Adam I love you, man. You know?

1:16:00 Drew What do you want from me?

1:16:01 Adam I just said, I love you, man. I just, you know, man.

1:16:04 Drew I love you, too, man.

1:16:04 Adam I haven't said it in a while. You know what I'm saying?

1:16:08 Drew And, and, you said it last night, though.

1:16:11 Caller Well, he's feeling the love.

1:16:13 Adam Hey, engineer Chris. Hey, man. Can you give me some more coffee?

1:16:20 I love screwing with Chris.

1:16:22 Adam All right. Well, see, that's, it's very interesting. And, you know, you, you can tell that people are really, you know, stretched to their emotional breaking points when they show people, you know, videos from home. Some of these, you know, they've been, it comes about day 23, sometimes day 27. I got a video from their mom who they probably hate. And these people are just bawling like babies. Like they can't believe it. And it's amazing, the stress and how that brings that out in them. All right. Let's talk to Terry, who's been on hold for 80 minutes. Make it 81. Terry, you're 23. Sorry, I wanted to go to you at the beginning when Colby said no.

1:17:03 Caller He said, come on now, Terry. You don't believe that.

1:17:06 Adam He said, Shannon, Elizabeth, and Jeff Brode. Very important, high-powered celebrity players are gonna be calling in. And I need to speak to them instead of Terry. All right, he didn't call you Terry. He called you one of the little people. Anyway. What's up, Terry?

1:17:21 Um, okay. Well, followed by another question about the hoo-ha. I noticed the other day in the shower that I have a little bump. And I guess like today it started hurting and basically it's just a sore.

1:17:41 Adam Yeah, where is it?

1:17:46 It's, um, I guess, like, um, I guess the other lip, like, Is it open or is it just a bump that's tender? It looks pretty much like a cold sore you get in your mouth.

1:18:01 Drew Well, that would be a herpes.

1:18:03 Well, I mean, the thing is, though, like, I haven't been with anyone for five months and before that it was three years and, like, I don't know if I, like, is it possible to not have any kind of symptoms and then just...

1:18:17 Drew Yeah, in fact, there's some data that suggests that most women with herpes don't know they have it, but there's another possibility. There are other reasons that people get cold sores, things that look like cold sores down there. Do you have anything in your mouth? Um, no. Do you have any joint problems or arthritis, anything along those lines?

1:18:34 No.

1:18:36 Drew You on medication?

1:18:36 Um, I was on surgery for a couple of weeks, other than that, no.

1:18:43 Adam I had a girl, uh, Drew, hold on a second, I have a hypothesis, I had a girlfriend back in the day that fell asleep with a lit cigarette up in there and, you know, eventually burned her. I left the same sort of mark. Anything like that, Terry?

1:19:00 Unfortunately, no.

1:19:01 Adam No. All right, check that off the list.

1:19:04 Drew But there are reasons to get ulcers down there that are not necessarily herpes, but the majority of the time it is herpes.

1:19:12 Adam Well, you can also, I mean, it's, it's not probable, and Drew's may, uh, make a fa at this, but, uh, it's possible to get it without having sexual intercourse, is it not?

1:19:26 Drew It's possible to have it transmitted down there, yeah.

1:19:28 Adam I mean, it's like, if, if somebody who had it got off a bike at a spinning class and you climbed onto that sweaty saddle after they moved their, uh, infected hooch off it, is that possible?

1:19:41 Caller You forgot the point about both of you need to be naked.

1:19:44 Adam Oh yeah.

1:19:44 Caller It's a naked spinning class.

1:19:46 Drew Oh yeah.

1:19:46 Adam That would be cool. Like a queen record, um.

1:19:51 Drew So it's a pretty hard thing to contract without sexual contact, it really is, but people can't transmit it from one part of their, like on their hand and it's possible. But so you need to be more, more like their medications, their autoimmune diseases that can be associated with this, but more often than not, it's herpes.

1:20:06 Adam Should she get it seen while there's something to see?

1:20:10 Drew Absolutely. Because the majority of the time it's a clinical diagnosis. So you want somebody to look at it while you have an outbreak.

1:20:17 Adam Yeah. So I mean, it's uncomfortable, but if you wait for it to go away, then the doctor can only speculate, much like Drew over the phone.

1:20:24 Drew Right.

1:20:25 Is that the only way to get diagnosis? I mean, I'm planning on going anyway, but is that the only way they can diagnose it?

1:20:32 Drew Well, if they really want to nail it down, they'll do a culture, but the predominant way is by inspection.

1:20:39 Adam All right, baby doll. Sorry. You know, some people never get laid and they get something. Other people, you know, they go on sex tours of Bangkok and they come back pristine. And it doesn't seem fair, you know, right? This is life. You know, the junkie cop killer gets shot nine times and is fine. And the kid takes a spill on the bike, hits his head on the coping of the pool and is gone. You know what I mean? Like, what the hell, Drew? This is how I know there's no God. Only a magnet. Only a great magnet. There's a great magnet in the sky. Yes. Yes, we should all all praise the great magnet. Yes. If you guys were smart, you'd get on board with it. I'm going to write a book and and and it's going to call the magnetism and it's about the great magnet. I'm going to start a religion, Drew. You want in? Oh, yeah. It's called my book's going to be called Magnetics. It's and it's kind of a volcano on it. You're going to explode with energy. Yeah. Maybe I'll start a cult.

1:21:45 Caller That is going to be Chrome Magnetism.

1:21:47 Adam Magnetism. Yeah, it's going to be big and everyone's going to wear small magnet around around their around their neck. And if they ever get in a room with a big enough speaker, everyone's heads is going to get sucked by their chain right in. All right, Drew. Good times.

1:22:03 Drew Good times.

1:22:04 Adam You believe in the great magnet, right?

1:22:05 Drew Of course.

1:22:06 Adam All right. Quick call. Quick call. And then Colby's got to get back to his poker game with his big celebrity friends. Cindy. Cindy. All right. Quick Germany. Quick Germany or Florida, Drew? You ready? Yeah. This is a game that's sweeping the nation, by the way, Colby. Eric? Yeah. Anderson, can we hear our Germany or Florida theme song, please?

1:22:36 Caller Things are sick and twisted from too much sun and Nazis. Sex, meth and death fetishes, both of them have got these, guaranteed not to bore you, Germany or Florida.

1:22:46 Adam Yes. Now, all bizarre stories either come out of Germany or Florida. We hear the bizarre story and then guess, is it Germany or Florida?

1:22:55 Caller I dig it.

1:22:56 Adam Go ahead, Eric.

1:22:56 Caller I dig it.

1:22:57 Caller First, Adam, funniest man alive. Dr. Drew, I read your book. It was great.

1:23:02 Adam Thanks, buddy. That's Anderson.

1:23:06 Caller A man dubbed the bumbling bank robber was convicted after investigators matched his DNA to the gold teeth knocked out when a van hit the fleeing suspect, prosecutors said Wednesday. As he ran out of the bank, he stuffed the gun into his waistband, accidentally firing it into his pants. The bullet missed him, but when he stepped into the street, he was hit by a van delivering school lunches in the area, investigators said. Germany or Florida?

1:23:28 Drew School lunches. Florida.

1:23:30 Adam School lunches, gold teeth.

1:23:32 Drew Yeah.

1:23:32 Adam The Krauts don't have gold teeth. That's something the American black man has cornered. We're going to Florida. Colby, you have any thoughts?

1:23:41 Caller I'm going to go against the grain here. I'm going to say Germany.

1:23:43 Adam Going Germany. Drew's Florida. I got Florida. Colby's got Germany. And Eric, is it Germany or Florida?

1:23:49 Caller Adam, you're always right. Florida.

1:23:51 Adam God love you, Eric.

1:23:55 Caller Thank you.

1:23:56 Adam All right. Colby is having to leave the building.

1:24:02 Caller Yeah.

1:24:02 Adam Been here far longer.

1:24:03 Caller It has been great. Once again, Drew, disappointed I didn't get to meet you, but it gives me the chance to come back. I honestly, honestly can't wait to meet you. Adam, it has been fun talking hot rods and hot babes.

1:24:14 Adam God love you, Colby.

1:24:15 Caller All the fun stuff.

1:24:16 Adam Favorite, favorite survivor, favorite show.

1:24:19 Caller Thanks, bro. Well, I'm going to go back and lose some money.

1:24:22 Adam Give our love to Shannon Elizabeth and Jeff Probst and tell those two to come back anytime they like. We'll take a quick break and we'll be right back. Hey everybody, it's Loveline.

1:24:54 Caller I'm Adam.

1:24:55 Adam That's Dr. Drew over there in Syracuse. Gonna be in our night. Colby has left the building. Good people, that Colby. Yeah, like these regular guys from small towns. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Gotta mention again now, Drew, Windy City Heat. You've seen the movie Windy City Heat.

1:25:17 Drew So funny.

1:25:18 Adam Seriously.

1:25:19 Drew Seriously.

1:25:20 Adam And let me say this, and I'm saying this, I'm being objective because I was one of the producers of the movie, but you know what that means. I didn't do anything. I had a small cameo in it. I really, you know, if I thought it wasn't good, I wouldn't be telling you it was good. This movie has, you sit and watch it in a theater, there is 30 to 50 out loud laughs over the course of this hour and a half movie, which I don't know too many movies you can say that for. Yes, Drew? Yes, Drew, you laugh like a maniac, yes?

1:25:51 Drew Maniac.

1:25:54 Adam Now, I don't want to put words in your mouth, Drew.

1:25:56 Drew No, I'm sitting right in front of you, right?

1:25:58 Adam Yes.

1:25:59 Drew Yeah, maniac.

1:26:03 Adam It's going to be showing at the Arc Light in Hollywood at 8.30 this Saturday.

1:26:08 Drew Is the star going to show up?

1:26:11 Adam Yes.

1:26:12 Drew Nice.

1:26:12 Adam The star, yes, Perry will be there, Perry Caravello and Mole and Big Lou, Don Barris and Jimmy Kimmel will be there. I'm trying to be there, but I got to do this ABC special that ends up taping into the night, Saturday night. Good time.

1:26:28 Drew What is that?

1:26:30 Adam I'm hosting a two part, one hour special where they're going to try to figure out the next Martha Stewart.

1:26:41 Drew What? Are you high?

1:26:44 Adam A little bit. I got a little buzz. Colby and I talked out pretty good in the parking lot, he turned me on. Yeah. What do you mean? Am I high? Are they high? That's the question, Drew.

1:26:55 Drew That is the question, Mr. Corolla.

1:26:58 Adam Yeah. No, I just, you know what? It's unscripted. I'm taking six people and putting them through their paces. They're going to have all these competitions. This sounded fun. And you know me, Drew, I don't like doing stuff.

1:27:10 Drew That's for sure.

1:27:11 Adam Yeah, it sounded easy until they gave me the shooting schedule, which is shooting Saturday and Sunday and Saturday, by the way, is like, yeah, show up at show up at 10. We'll have you out of there by two. Oh, OK, great. Then we'll need you back again at five. Oh, here's the other thing, Drew. Here's where we come in. It's out in Pasadena.

1:27:32 Drew No, where?

1:27:33 Adam Yeah. I don't know. Probably some big, nice house out in Pasadena.

1:27:37 Drew We've got to get together.

1:27:38 Adam Possibly your own. Well, here's what I'm saying. I may catch a shower nap and a whack over at your place Saturday, you know, in between in between in between shooting, you know, that's fine.

1:27:47 Drew My come watch my kids baseball game.

1:27:50 Adam We'll work it out.

1:27:51 Drew No good times.

1:27:52 Adam I give you Buster. My. All right. Let's get back to the phones, Drew. Shall we?

1:27:58 Drew Yeah, let's do.

1:28:00 Adam You know, I'm such an idiot. I, you know, wherever the posted is stuck to, that's the one I just go back to. I act like you're putting the post it on, Drew, Brianna. You're 17. What's up, baby?

1:28:15 Caller I was just wondering. My dad used to beat my mom and I grew up seeing it all the time. And I have a serious relationship now with a boyfriend and we were talking about like what's happened in the past and he thinks that I'm going to like want that from like, you know.

1:28:32 Drew You're not going to want that, but you might have difficulties staying in a relationship. Do you have trouble with relationships?

1:28:37 Caller No. Well, he's like my first serious boyfriend.

1:28:40 Drew How old are you now?

1:28:41 Adam I'm 17. That has to be horrifying to watch your mom take a beating from her dad.

1:28:47 Caller Yeah.

1:28:49 Adam All right. And is your dad out of the picture now?

1:28:52 Caller No.

1:28:55 Adam God bless him. So here's the thing. Usually and yeah, you're going to have feelings around these subjects, but because you're calling and asking probably means you're not going to be nearly as bad as your mom.

1:29:08 Drew You sound okay. It's hard to say. I mean, you'll see. Do you have any ambivalent feelings, any unusual feelings about being in the relationship? No.

1:29:16 Caller Like I'm perfectly happy with him. It's just like, I don't know if like in the future, like, I don't know if I get married to someone like.

1:29:26 Drew It's not so much that you'll cause that as much as you'll be attracted to guys that have that potential in them.

1:29:31 Caller Yeah, that's what I heard. And like, he's not like that at all. But even though I never got beat at all, like I'm still handshy and everything.

1:29:42 Adam How about a little therapy, perhaps?

1:29:43 Drew Did your dad drink when he was doing that? How about some alanine? Alatine. Alanine or alatine would be helpful. Why don't you start up again?

1:29:59 Adam Yeah, alanine or alatine. Couldn't hurt. And let's talk to, I'm going to go for whoever's been on hold along us. That would be Brooke, who's 23. Brooke.

1:30:11 Hey, guys. How are you?

1:30:12 Adam Good. What's happening?

1:30:14 Well, I, your producer told me not to talk too much about the doctor, but I'm getting prescription drugs, a lot of them, and I just want to know what to do as far as detoxing myself and if it's going to be like super, super hard or what's the drug. Everything. I mean, I'm living like Elvis. I'm taking uppers in the morning and downers at night.

1:30:34 Drew You need to go in a hospital. You think? The downers can be, what are you taking, Ativan or Xanax or something?

1:30:41 Xanax, 10 milligrams, four of them.

1:30:44 Drew Okay. That can be very dangerous to detox.

1:30:46 I drink my red wine, but Adam says he drinks his red wine with his Ambien.

1:30:50 Adam Yeah.

1:30:50 Drew Adam, for Christ's sake.

1:30:52 Adam Hold on a second.

1:30:53 I just want to tell everybody, please do not get tangled up in this. Oh my God.

1:31:00 Drew Go get it in a hospital. Where are you calling from?

1:31:06 Nobody knows my job is an office job.

1:31:09 Drew They're going to have to know because it's going to take some time and some effort and they're going to have to participate in that. But it's a real serious thing.

1:31:14 Adam Well, let me ask a couple. Hold on. Quiet down. No. Let me ask a couple of quick questions. How long has this been going on?

1:31:22 I was injured in a car accident about six months ago. So the legitimate doctors were giving me a pain medication for about two months and then they cut me off so I had to start going to the non-legitimate doctors.

1:31:36 Adam Right.

1:31:38 Drew The suppliers.

1:31:38 The drug healing doctors.

1:31:40 Adam Right.

1:31:41 Drew Right.

1:31:41 Adam So it's been six months so it's in full swing. And Drew, how?

1:31:44 I don't take that much. I only take about six really high doses of hydrocodone a day and then I take the Xanax at night. So that's not that much. I mean, when you can see the fresh limba.

1:31:54 Drew It's not that much but opiate addiction just does not work, does not respond to outpatient treatment very well. It really doesn't. Really?

1:32:02 I mean, I've always been the one that's been like, you know, the good one and the, you know, never got, never smoked a cigarette, never did anything like that in my life.

1:32:08 Drew Well, you look, you didn't ask for this but here we are.

1:32:10 Caller You got a car accident.

1:32:12 Adam Yeah, it happens to everybody.

1:32:13 I know, it happens to so many people but. And then I have my little beer, have my two beers and I mean, is it true that like one night I can be, I can have a beer and it could just like, like, like counteract with my Xanax and I could die?

1:32:29 Drew Not likely.

1:32:30 Adam Not likely. Now he's trying to get you to put the beer down or the Xanax down. All right, so here's the deal. She can't do this alone, she can't do it on her own.

1:32:43 Caller There's no way I can just, I can just stop taking the Vicodin.

1:32:46 Adam Or how does it work?

1:32:47 Caller Well, can I just stop taking the Vicodin and just withdraw with, with the Xanax and just like get it out of my system for a couple days?

1:32:54 Drew You can but you'll feel like hell and you'll go back to it. Yeah, just this is all very, very dangerous. Very dangerous.

1:33:03 Adam It is. All right. It's physically dangerous to stop.

1:33:07 Drew Because she's going to try to stop taking the opiates and escalate the Xanax. She's going to get severely addicted to that, sort of try to bring that down and have a seizure. It's really, this is, you shouldn't be screwing around with this, don't you? You got to go somewhere where there are professionals that deal with this all the time, get it treated. All right.

1:33:21 Adam Like Jiffy Lube or somewhere like that?

1:33:22 Drew Yeah, that's right.

1:33:23 Adam We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

1:33:26 Caller So I know there's nothing wrong with me. So what's up? This hour brought to you in part by Axe.

1:33:51 Caller Experience the Axe Effect.

1:34:11 Adam Alright, that's the show. I want to thank Colby for coming in here and I. Move over, Ethan. There's a new sheriff in town. His name is Colby. Yeah. Well, we now know what producer Anne likes. She likes him hot. And you know, producer Anne, she's like a dude. She's like, yeah, it's a nice slab of meat there. Nothing wrong with that. All right, Drew will be back from Syracuse, and I look forward to seeing him. James Marsters will be in here from Angel and I remember from Buffy. And we'll take a quick 22 hour break. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying, Mahalo.

1:34:48 Caller Have you guys tasted his water, by the way?

1:34:51 Adam Oh, his water. Oh, his alleged water is Big Gulf, which is nothing but Kamchatka and Gatorade. Yes, I'm sure there's booze in there.

1:35:00 Caller Thanks, Shannon.

1:35:01 Adam This kid's got a problem.

1:35:06 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Ingold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Wednesday, April 21, 2004