Episode 1000588743883

0:54 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually oriented content.

1:00 Voiceover Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:07 Adam Filming for Dr. Drew. Dr. Bruce, board-certified physician, addiction medicine specialist, emergency medicine specialist, and a whiz with a tattoo, everybody. Get rid of your tats, make you look 20 years younger.

1:21 Dr. Bruce Wrinkles, tattoos, we'll get rid of them, whatever you got.

1:24 Adam Right, a man who has no wrinkles, Stephen Baldwin is in here tonight from Celebrity Mole, which is on ABC, Wednesday nights, 10 o'clock. Celebrity Mole, Yucatan, which I don't know where it is, but it looks great. Is it good? Well, last Celebrity Mole you did was Hawaii, right?

1:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hold on a second. Drew, if you're listening, I already like this guy better than you.

1:49 Adam Oh, man.

1:51 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I just want to start like that.

1:52 Adam And that's all it takes, by the way.

1:54 Dr. Bruce This will be my last show.

1:57 Adam No, Drew, please.

2:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's got it. Drew Schmoo. It's like when Howard got rid of that other guy. See, now he's just the other guy.

2:07 Adam That's right. You mean we got rid of Jackie Martley?

2:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah.

2:11 Dr. Bruce It's time for a change over here.

2:13 Adam It's time for a turnover.

2:14 It's time for a facelift.

2:16 Adam You know what we want to do with this show? We want to do the same thing.

2:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What was that?

2:20 Dr. Bruce This kid calls in about six months ago and I'm filling in, where's Dr. Drew?

2:27 Adam What we want to do with this show is the same thing you do to the ladies with the laser. We want to give it a facelift. We want to give it a new look. It's got to be fresh. It was stale. Drew's been here for 20 years. The man's burnt out. We need some fresh blood pumping in this show.

2:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I agree.

2:41 Adam Yeah. Bruce may be the new sheriff in town. Yeah. More of a Barney Fife, actually. I'll be the sheriff.

2:48 Dr. Bruce So you're assuming I'm my deputy. I'd work with you.

2:51 Adam Listen, if I paid you a nickel, you'd come here six days a week and cut my nuts while I was talking.

2:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hey, now.

2:58 Adam He's a desperate man.

3:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Calm down.

3:01 Adam Sorry. Stephen Baldwin is here. Stephen is here from the Celebrity Mole. Now, last Celebrity Mole, there's a little controversy with Stephen and Kathy Gray.

3:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I don't know what you're talking about.

3:12 Adam This year.

3:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce By the way, what can you do for her face?

3:14 Dr. Bruce I've laid her.

3:15 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm sorry. You did? You lasered Kathy Griffin's face?

3:19 Dr. Bruce Well, yeah. I mean, it's not confidential because I think we did it on Loveline when they did it on me.

3:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You lasered? Did it help at all?

3:25 Adam She looked like Phyllis Diller before he got to her.

3:27 Dr. Bruce So can you believe it? I think she's attractive.

3:29 Adam She's a good looking lady. And let me say this, a dear, dear friend, a dear friend, a dear friend. Bruce, stop coughing.

3:37 Dr. Bruce That's not me coughing.

3:42 Adam Now, Dennis Rodman is on this show. Did he behave? Did you get along with him? How many people did you know? Did you know Amanda Lewis, or I mean, Ananda Lewis, or Angie Everhart, or Mark Curry, or any of these people?

3:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I knew Corbin, because we did the first Celebrity Mole together.

4:01 Oh, that's right, Corbin.

4:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Which was a lot of fun. I knew Dennis just because, you know, I'd see him around at church.

4:09 Adam Right. It doesn't surprise me.

4:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Or actually nightclubs that had been converted into nightclubs that were previously churches.

4:18 Adam Right.

4:18 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Like Limelight in New York. But anyway, I knew Ananda, of course, from her fabulous MTV days.

4:25 Adam Right.

4:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I didn't know Tracy Gold. She's an absolute doll.

4:30 Adam You got along with her?

4:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce She's a doll.

4:33 Adam All right.

4:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce One of the nicest people I've ever met in the industry.

4:36 Adam Now, how about Angie Everhart? Because, you know, you know, I've met her.

4:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I've met her, seen her around, and I know people who know her.

4:47 Adam Did you get along OK with her?

4:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce She's a doll.

4:49 Adam Wow. All right. So no, no big riffs with any of the other celebrities this time around.

4:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, that that that Keisha, what's your name? What's that little Cosby kid?

5:00 Adam Yeah, Keisha Knight.

5:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Polly him.

5:03 Adam Yeah, big pull you on. Yeah.

5:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah.

5:06 Adam You didn't get along with her too good.

5:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, it wasn't that I didn't get along with her. It's just that she didn't. You know, I didn't like how she played the game. She was boring. She's cute, but she was just boring.

5:16 Adam Now, how do you compare this to last year? Celebrity Mall better, worse, different?

5:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, it's better for me because it was my second shot at like trying to do anything.

5:27 Adam Is it two hundred and fifty grand? Is that the grand prize?

5:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I got to tell you something. If they ever do this again, yes, they fly in. They fly your family in first class all the way. A week or two, like a week and a half, two weeks.

5:43 Adam Where in the Yucatan?

5:45 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce We stayed at the lovely Occidental Flamenco Hotel in Cancun. Basically, the Yucatan is Cancun. But we stayed at the Occidental Excaret Flamenco, I don't know what it is, it's a big resort and it's fabulous, beautiful.

6:06 Adam Did you like it better than Hawaii?

6:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I liked it better than Hawaii.

6:11 Adam All right. Why?

6:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Just because, well, it was my second time, as I said, and it was a lot more fun because I had kind of been through the ropes, so to speak. But, you know, unlike a lot of people in that situation who would have come back, like, you know, with all kinds of agendas about how to really try to win, I didn't do that. I just came to have a blast, which is what I always do, and brought my wife and kids and had a great time.

6:41 Adam Well, good. Mazel Tov is...

6:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Praise the Lord...

6:44 Adam .Drew's... actually, I'm not Jewish, but Drew's half-Jew, so he might say Mazel Tov. And didn't Kathy Griffin win last year?

6:52 Yeah, the little...

6:53 Adam You're arch-nemesis.

6:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, no, she's not my arch-nemesis.

6:57 Adam A lot of plastic surgery, 250 grand.

7:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I think she's just whacked.

7:01 Adam Yeah, she's a little nutty.

7:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I goofed around with her. She wigged out. Like...

7:06 Adam She got issues.

7:07 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce She's a psycho.

7:09 Adam She's a dear, dear friend of the show, though. We can't say horrible things about her.

7:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, she's that thing that the stand-ups... See, you're a successful guy, you come from stand-up, but you've adjusted into society and reality well, unlike most stand-up comics. Most of them are psychos who can never differentiate between art and life.

7:29 Adam Yeah. Well, you gotta understand.

7:31 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Like, you're talented enough to not have to use this exchange here, like, in your routine.

7:37 Adam Oh, I see. I see.

7:39 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce See, that's what's a really sad reality about stand-up comics.

7:41 Adam Right. Well, I don't really have a routine, is my sad reality.

7:45 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, you don't need one.

7:46 Adam But, well, thank you.

7:46 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Because you're talented.

7:48 Well, thank you, Stephen.

7:49 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You've advanced successfully well beyond just your stand-up talents.

7:55 Adam Well, I'll tell you what goes on, I think. Thank you, Stephen. Thank you. Wow, out of the box. Just a little bit of ask-us, and I like that.

8:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Of course.

8:03 Adam Let me say this.

8:04 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm not stupid.

8:05 Adam Most comedians are neurotic. They absolutely are. That's what drove them to the business. That's where the sense of humor comes from. It's born of that pain they had as children and so on and so forth. Now, female comedians are super neurotic, so you're dealing with a group there that's almost a breed of dog in that once in a while you find a calm dalmatian, but not very often. And it's the same with the female stand-up comedians. They're a little nutty. There's stuff in them. There's stuff inside of them, and it's growing.

8:36 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Unfortunately, what stand-up comics are doing is they're creating a reputation for themselves like the pit bull, where eventually everyone's going to think that they're going to turn and bite them. Every time I meet a stand-up comic, I won't talk about anything meaningful or personal in my life.

8:55 Adam Yeah, because oftentimes they can't shut it off, and they're on all the time.

9:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's what I mean. Like Paulie, sure, I love him. He's my buddy. We do biodome together.

9:05 Adam Yeah.

9:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I see him like a year and a half later, you know, I talked, bumped into him a couple places, but I see him and I like, you know, we have a coffee and he's like, hey, dude, so my Baldwin Brothers thing went over big in at Lake Havasu. I'm like, what? He goes, oh, yeah, I do a whole thing about you and all those stories you told me about your family. I'm like, oh, you know, wow. Okay.

9:27 Yeah.

9:28 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I just hung up that phone quick.

9:30 Adam Yeah. I tried to do some material on Bruce, but everyone is like, who?

9:33 What?

9:34 Adam I was like, you know, Dr. Bruce, Dr. Spaz. And then they all clapped. They all clapped when I said Dr. Spaz.

9:40 Dr. Bruce It seems like there are two types of comedians, the ones that are insecure and their demons drive them, and then the ones that are very secure and genius like, which Adam is, I hate to say it, but he sees things, he's able to, you know, make those analogies that are, these analogies are.

9:53 Adam I'm blushing.

9:54 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Anybody who can just, you know, he's had tremendous success. Obviously he's carved a little niche for himself. But more than that, I think the only reason that any of the Corolla thing works is he's weird.

10:05 Dr. Bruce Well, he's who he is on the show, which is.

10:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce But you know, kudos.

10:10 Adam Well, thank you.

10:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's taking the weird ball and just run with it, hasn't he?

10:16 Adam Bruce, I'm the same off the air, am I not? Oh yeah.

10:21 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Maybe more.

10:21 Dr. Bruce You're a curmudgeon.

10:23 Adam Oh, come on, buddy.

10:24 Dr. Bruce That's a compliment.

10:25 Adam Bruce, come on. We're thick as Steve's. All right, don't be quiet. Let's move forward. Stephen Baldwin, in here tonight from Celebrity Mole, which is ABC, Wednesday Nights, 10 o'clock. And let's talk to Mathias. Mathias? Mathias.

10:42 Yeah.

10:43 Adam You're 18. What's up? Mm-hmm. It's got that, you can crack it, like you can crack your knuckle?

10:52 Caller Sort of. Yeah, it's just a weird popping thing.

10:56 Dr. Bruce Not, okay, when it's hard or soft.

10:58 Adam It's got to be hard.

10:59 Caller Yeah, hard.

10:59 Dr. Bruce Well, you know, it gets established.

11:00 Adam It's hard. And you do it just like when a pianist, before he plays the piano, does that, you know, Crack the knuckles.

11:06 Dr. Bruce Right, just like your mother told you.

11:08 Adam Before you hop in a bed, you give that, snap.

11:11 Dr. Bruce Right, well, when it's hard, it's almost like there are ligaments that connect it, and when you're stretching those, sometimes you'll hear a popping sound. I mean, it's not something, just like some people can pop their knuckles and other people can't.

11:20 Adam Yeah, it can happen. I used to be able to do it.

11:23 Dr. Bruce Right, there are, there are penile fractures. You can have trauma when the penises erect, and that's a, that's a different story. You'll hear a popping, but then you've ruptured the, the sponge-like tissue that creates the, the erection. So, that's a totally different thing. Sounds like you're talking about, you're entertaining people with this popping.

11:42 Adam You have a girlfriend? Uh, yeah. Does she like it, or is it freaking around?

11:46 Caller Oh, she's not quite sure what to do about it, because she was listening to a sex talk with Sue, and she, um, Sue said that it breaks and it'll fall off and all sorts of horrible crap, and so I wanted to make sure that my penis needs to stay intact.

12:02 Adam No, he just wanted to drop that name. That's my point. I don't know what... It must be another show. But anyway, uh... Who? There you go. Alright, I'm just gonna hang up. I just made this question up so we could try and drop somebody's name in. But here's the whole thing, too. If you're gonna drop in the name of another radio show or TV show or something like that, it's great advertisement for the show, except for when the three people go, who's that? Then it's sort of bad advertisement for the show. Well, you got out of the gates poorly, Bruce, I must say. But we're looking to rebound with Linda, who's 19.

12:35 Dr. Bruce Linda?

12:37 It's Brenda.

12:39 Adam It's Brenda.

12:40 Says Linda.

12:42 Dr. Bruce Gates herself.

12:43 Adam Whatever. What does the screen say, Bruce?

12:46 Dr. Bruce You're in charge here.

12:47 Adam What does the screen say, you jack-off? How dare you?

12:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hi, Brenda.

12:51 Dr. Bruce Current and passport.

12:53 Adam No, what's the name say? All right, go ahead, Brenda.

12:58 Caller Do you want the health question first or the emotional question?

13:01 Adam Give us whatever's more entertaining.

13:05 Caller I don't know which is entertaining. The bleeding during sex thing.

13:12 Adam Give us the other one. I want the other question.

13:14 Caller Do you want the other one?

13:17 Dr. Bruce Well, that's an easy one. You need to have a pelvic exam. You might have some you could have a lesion there that's causing it or it could be ectopic endometrial tissue that's bleeding and it's relative.

13:30 Caller Well, I had a pap smear since that happened.

13:33 Dr. Bruce You haven't?

13:34 Adam She's had one.

13:35 Caller It happened once in December. All right. And I've been kind of sore for a couple of weeks, but having sex by every day. And I think that it might just be overused.

13:46 Adam Some women just bleed when they have sex.

13:47 Dr. Bruce Right. It can be normal. Well, the point is, whenever you have vaginal bleeding, you need to be reevaluated, even if you had a pelvic, you know, three, six months ago, because there could be lesions there that are related to a sexually transmitted disease. You could have a growth that wasn't there that's there now. I mean, things change. So, you know, you can go into a differential diagnosis of all the different things it could be. You need to have a pelvic again.

14:09 Caller Well, I've had one since that happened. But then I didn't really ask about it because, I don't know, it was kind of embarrassing.

14:18 Dr. Bruce Does it continue to happen?

14:20 Caller Well, it got sore again and I'm worried that it will happen again.

14:26 Adam Go to the goddamn gyno, would you?

14:28 Dr. Bruce Yeah. I did already.

14:30 Adam You have to go and get out of here. Jesus Christ. I swear. Like, if I say to someone, let's go, give me a good question. I think they drag their feet intentionally. Well, all right.

14:43 Dr. Bruce You need to be paid. You know, that's why I'm...

14:45 Adam She went. She went to the gyno. She did like an idiot, though. She didn't tell him about the bleeding. She just went and got a regular checkup.

14:51 Dr. Bruce The person said everything's fine.

14:54 Adam And now it isn't bleeding. It's just there's a soreness. Listen, ladies, it ain't a catcher's mitt. You use it enough, it starts getting a little sore on you.

15:03 Dr. Bruce Her emotional problem might be better, won't we?

15:06 Adam No, no. She screwed the pooch. Screw her. I gave her a shot.

15:11 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Adam Carolla is God.

15:13 Adam That's right. That's right. Come in a radio station near you. I want to talk to Chris because I saw anal sex up there. Chris? I don't believe you already.

15:25 I'm sorry.

15:27 I was, I didn't, I couldn't hear you guys.

15:30 Adam What's happening?

15:31 Okay.

15:31 I was just basically wondering if there, if there's any way you can get an STD from having anal sex.

15:37 Adam Impossible.

15:38 Dr. Bruce Absolutely.

15:40 Really?

15:40 Adam Yeah. You're 19 years of age. You haven't, you haven't heard anything about getting a venereal disease via anal sex? No, I haven't. You can get everything.

15:54 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Where are you from?

15:56 Adam It's actually calling from Utah. So maybe.

15:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce There you go. Are you, are you a Mormon?

16:01 I'm, I'm not.

16:02 Adam Do you guys have AIDS over there?

16:04 No, we've got a lot of Mormons.

16:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You're a Mormon?

16:09 No, I'm not.

16:10 Dr. Bruce But listen, any, anywhere you have skin, you're protected against, you know, if you drip blood in your skin, something that might be a conduit for bacteria. But where you have mucous membranes, whether it's anal, vaginal, your urethra, your throat, I mean, a lot of people say, well, I just had oral sex and pharyngeal gonorrhea is very common. Anal gonorrhea. You can get anything that you can get through normal sex through anal sex. I have seen some huge.

16:41 Adam Police Dallas.

16:42 Dr. Bruce The anal warts.

16:43 Adam I've seen some huge ones.

16:44 Dr. Bruce The variety that look like cauliflower. Absolutely.

16:47 Adam Really? Were you squatting on a mirror? Where were you when you saw these said anal warts? Really?

16:55 Dr. Bruce The last time I was.

16:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Kathy Griffin?

16:58 Adam That's when he used the laser on. Took the laser right to the cauliflower.

17:03 Dr. Bruce You comedians, I guess it's cutthroat business, you could say. No, but seriously, now why does he think, why are you concerned that you might have an anus?

17:10 Adam Bruce is like, hey Kathy, you're looking, oh, that's your anus. Oh, no, Christ, no, hand over again.

17:16 Dr. Bruce That's a good friend of the show.

17:17 Adam No, she's a dear friend. I've known her for many years. But you know, listen, she dishes a little dirt, I can do a little dish of myself. All right, so the point is, Kathy Griffin, dear, dear friend, anal warts.

17:30 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Ca-la-flower, what?

17:31 Adam Anal warts, good or bad?

17:33 Dr. Bruce Anal warts are bad.

17:34 Adam Ca-la-flower in the ass?

17:36 Dr. Bruce They're different. They're proud. They're dozens of different strains of virus, different strains. And the different, if you want to call them species, or think of it that way, the different strains cause different shaped.

17:48 Adam Yeah. They look like college flies.

17:50 Dr. Bruce Some are very flat. You can't even see them. Others grow out. But this guy needs to get. He's sore.

17:58 Adam I'm not sure. Chris.

17:59 Dr. Bruce Yeah.

18:00 Adam Are you and who's having anal sex? You and a guy? You and a girl?

18:05 No. It was me and a girl.

18:08 Adam Yeah. Well, here's the whole thing. I mean, stop me if I'm wrong. But anal is the best mode to spread any venereal disease, right? Because you have the tension, the extra tension, the extra mucosal membranes and stuff down there. And then you have the wild card thing, which is God's wrath. I mean, God's sort of punishing you a little bit for providing in this sort of unholy union. Do you not?

18:37 Dr. Bruce There's probably more tissue trauma there. And any time, again, the surface of the penis, that skin is more resistant to bacteria. But when you scrape it, bleeding is...

18:47 Adam If I could have sex with you and it was like that game operation where my penis didn't touch the wall of anything and it just sort of went in and out, there'd be zero.

18:55 Dr. Bruce Right.

18:56 Adam But if I was trying to squeeze it through a keyhole, there'd be a lot of trauma, right? And then the anus is certainly tighter than other orifices in the body.

19:06 Dr. Bruce Depending on how much exercise it's received. Right.

19:10 Adam Right. Stephen, not anal off the list for you now, yes?

19:15 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Absolutely.

19:16 Adam That's right. Not a fan of it myself.

19:18 Dr. Bruce I mean, he needs to look at it as any other kind of penetrating sex. He needs to use a condom, but he needs to get a value. What are your symptoms of that?

19:27 He says he has symptoms.

19:28 Adam Just tell him to go to the doctor. All right. What are your symptoms, Chris?

19:31 Are you a Mormon?

19:33 Why in God's name are you asking me if I'm Mormon?

19:37 Adam That's Dr. Drew asking from whatever ski lodge he's at right now. What are your symptoms?

19:42 The symptoms basically are just severe itching. You know, it's basically it. So, I.

19:54 Adam Your penis itches?

19:56 No. Just like near my ball sack.

20:01 Adam Well, that's somewhere around your penis, right?

20:03 You know, my balls always itch usually, you know, but not as much.

20:07 Dr. Bruce Well, there's no way to tell. But it's.

20:09 Adam Is it some sort of jack-off night tonight? Some sort of national competition where it doesn't help. Baldwin doesn't attract the Harvard crowd.

20:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He went balls when he's hung up on the balls.

20:22 Dr. Bruce No, that's a that's an excellent call. And if you know, somebody's listening, because no, because if someone's calling with a question like that means there are a lot of people out there that might have the same question or misunderstanding anal sex is very risky. And if this gal likes it, it means she's had it before a lot.

20:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And obviously, that means and also in that in that God's wrath type of way for the kids out there that think that, you know, especially the girls in high school, etc, etc, that think they're still a virgin. Yeah, there's a handful of their letting their letting the boys like go back door there.

20:56 Adam Yeah.

20:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah. Read your Bible, kids. Yeah, that is virginity is a spiritual reality as well.

21:02 Adam That's right. BJs back door, nasal ear penetration, it all counts. Yes. It's here. This is what Drew and I used to talk about that don't look at the hymen as just the thin sheath of skin that's inside the vagina, but look at it as an imaginary plane, a barrier over almost every opening that once it's broken, the hymen is broken, meaning your mouth has a hymen. Your ass has what I like to call a be hymen. Your hand when you do this with it, when you make it into that sort of senior wences fit, that's a hymen. If you want to say you're a virgin, you have to keep all these hymens intact. These planes cannot be broken.

21:51 Dr. Bruce Like the football goal line.

21:52 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's right.

21:52 Adam You cannot cross that plane.

21:54 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'd like to suggest that you utilize this philosophy in regard to your mind as well. Your mind should have a hymen, Adam, that should never be broken.

22:05 Adam My uncle broke it in the basement of my father's house many when I was just a lad. And that's why I need therapy today. But Stephen agrees with me on my hymen plane breaking theory. The mouth, the hand, the ass, it's all. You can't break the plane.

22:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I don't know what you're talking about.

22:25 Adam You are not a virgin if you get something in your coolie.

22:28 Dr. Bruce I'll take issue with God's wrath and God's AIDS, whatever else you're talking about. That's not a biblical principle.

22:36 Adam You're a man of science, but I'm a man of God. You understand? And I understand. Now, here's what I think of as long as if we're going to get semi-serious about this. I do think that nature doesn't let certain things go on. Like I do think that A, there's a certain amount of the population that's going to be gay and a certain amount of the population is going to kill themselves and a certain amount of the population is going to kill other people. And it's a sort of built in way that nature keeps the populace at bay, or at least an attempt to keep the populace at bay. You can call it nature or God or whatever. And I do think stuff like AIDS, without sounding like just some horrible right wing Bible thumper, because I'm not, but I do think that at the point where you're opening up bath houses and you're putting glory holes and stalls and you're having lines of 20 guys line up to bust a nut and then head back out for another daiquiri, eventually nature slides in and puts an end to it. And then that's basically what happened with AIDS in my humble opinion. I am jealous too, yeah, because I was like 21st in the line and got cut off right at the end. That's engineer Anderson, who's a lot like God, except if God had a tattoo on his left calf. That's him. All right, now these are all very heady topics that we'll spend some time on, but we have to take a break. Stephen Baldwin is here from Celebrity Mole, ABC, Wednesday nights at 10 o'clock. Dr. Bruce filling in for Dr. Drew quite adequately and it's Adam Carolla sitting in for Adam Carolla. So, we'll be right back after this.

24:24 Caller Hello, this is your radio.

24:44 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Bruce, filling in for Dr. Drew, that's Stephen Baldwin, who is not filling in for anybody. And rightfully so. I don't even know what that means. Atmosphere, the band Atmosphere is gonna be here tomorrow night. Stephen is making a personal call. What city is the person you're talking to in?

25:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Now, I'm talking to my buddies. Are you driving in your car, Jimmy?

25:15 Adam You don't have to do driving in your car, by the way. You're gonna say, are you driving? People know what you're talking about.

25:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Turn it on, dawg, cause I'm gonna give a shout out to you.

25:24 Dr. Bruce Yeah, let's maintain the high quality.

25:30 Adam Listen, I'm gonna plug Cabin Fever. Now, here's the deal. Sit on down, Stephen. We gotta plug this quick DVD giveaway here, which is Cabin Fever, the movie which is-

25:42 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I know that movie.

25:42 Adam It's coming out tomorrow, I think.

25:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce My great buddy produced that movie. Jeff Hoffman produced that movie.

25:50 Adam Fantabulous producer, this Hoffman.

25:52 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's right. And- He's outstanding.

25:54 Adam He whipped up a little gem.

25:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Cause he's a friend of mine.

25:57 Adam Say dear friend, it sounds better.

25:59 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Cause he's a dear friend of mine.

26:01 Adam Cabin Fever is his latest joint, as they say in the business. And the DVD's coming out tomorrow. If you call in, and you're over 18, you get a DVD of Cabin Fever. And at the end of the week, we throw everyone's name in the hopper. And I don't even know if it's the end of the week, but at the end of something, and we pull out a name, and that person is going to Whistler, which is a big time ski resort over there in Canada. And you and three of your friends, airfare, everything. Great deal. It is a good deal. And we've been doing it.

26:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Long as you don't sit up there in the first class and get cabin fever, you know what I'm saying?

26:45 Adam And then you go.

26:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Ha ha ha.

26:52 Adam Ha ha ha. Then you go to a cabin in Whistler and Ski, you get airfare, you get lift tickets, you get the whole thing. So.

26:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Gnarly.

26:59 Adam That's the big cabin fever giveaway. And the movie's gotta be great because the producer is a dear, dear friend of Stephen Baldwin.

27:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Absolutely. Hey, should I plug some of my stuff now?

27:13 Adam Yeah, go ahead. Well, let me plug, let me just plug Celebrity Mole, Yucatan, which is Wednesday night's ABC. Well, guess who didn't win, everybody?

27:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hey, wait a minute.

27:25 Adam Yeah.

27:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What are you talking about?

27:27 Adam I know what's going on.

27:29 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You don't know nothing.

27:30 Adam You don't have the posture of a winner, Baldwin.

27:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm exhausted from whoring for the dang thing.

27:37 Adam Plus, I don't want to give too much away, but I saw him pull up in a $18,000 car. That's not the ride of a man who just won 250 lunch.

27:46 Dr. Bruce He's a humble man, Adam.

27:47 Adam Oh, maybe it is.

27:47 Dr. Bruce Humility.

27:48 Adam Tidings, too.

27:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm not allowed to buy a vehicle that's more expensive than $50,000 now.

27:55 Adam Really?

27:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah.

27:56 Adam Why is that?

27:57 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Because the Lord won't allow it, Adam.

27:59 Adam Really? But I thought the Lord's ceiling was 30 grand.

28:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, depends on how much favor he shows you.

28:06 Adam I see. I think he could do good for-

28:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's obviously showed you a lot of favor.

28:11 Adam That's right. He's been very good to me. The Denali was just a land. I mean, that's not actually my vehicle, but go ahead, give a plug, because what a lot of people don't know about Stephen Baldwin is as much as he kids about the Lord, that's his new best friend. I mean, you became born again, how long ago?

28:30 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Two years.

28:31 Adam Two years. And why?

28:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, it's a predestined reality, Adam.

28:37 Adam I mean, but you didn't bottom out or anything. I mean this with all due respect.

28:43 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm 15 years sober.

28:44 Oh, really?

28:44 Adam Yeah, cause a lot of guys, you know, find it in the joint or find Jesus when they hit sobriety or there's a point, their wife leaves them, they squander all their savings on crack, you know.

28:57 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce There's an event. Me, it was like a me and the wife thing. Like the wife kind of get into it before me.

29:03 Right.

29:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And then it was 9-11, dude.

29:05 Adam Oh, really?

29:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce 9-11 just totally shattered me spiritually.

29:11 Adam Interesting. And before that, how religious were you? How were the bald ones brought up? Were you guys going to church as children?

29:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce We were a bunch of rabbits running around, you know, Irish Catholic. Know what I'm saying? And a lot of that mating process kind of continued on to.

29:30 Adam So you guys didn't go to church Sundays?

29:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, we did, but you know, the church in this country is what it is, you know? I mean, you know.

29:41 Adam It's hard to argue with that statement, by the way.

29:43 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Bro, it's a very simple thing.

29:45 Adam Right.

29:45 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Read the Book of John. I'm not kidding.

29:49 Adam All right, Book of John. I'm writing this down. Ironically, I may be reading it on the John. That's not disrespectful, though, is it?

29:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The Lord doesn't care where you're sitting, son.

29:57 Adam All right, all right.

29:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Book of John. Read the Book of John.

30:00 Adam Now, what is the Book of John?

30:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's a letter that was written to the world. By God, you read by God through John.

30:13 Adam Have you read the Book of John?

30:15 Dr. Bruce Oh, absolutely.

30:16 Adam Yeah. Is that a separate book?

30:18 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, no, no, no, no.

30:18 Adam The Bible?

30:19 Dr. Bruce Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, New Testament.

30:21 Adam New Testament.

30:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce New Testament.

30:22 Dr. Bruce You know, John 316, you see it at the football game. We can, Adam will relate.

30:26 Adam And Rainbow Head.

30:26 Dr. Bruce The signs, no, the signs of the football stadium, you know. God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, right, John 316. So that's Bible, New Testament.

30:34 Adam But Rainbow Head used to do that, and then he killed somebody.

30:38 Dr. Bruce So not a good example.

30:40 Adam And by the way, who's going to step up and be the new Rainbow Head? The guy with the big rainbow Afro wig, who's in the end zone of the, of the playoff games holding the 316 up. So read the book of John. That's what I should do.

30:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You should read the book of John.

30:57 Adam I'm going to do that. So now, now you consider yourself born again.

31:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, I don't consider myself.

31:04 Adam You are.

31:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm absolutely.

31:07 Adam Well, that's the way I meant it.

31:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Nanny.

31:10 Adam It doesn't offend you for somebody to call you a born again crap.

31:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Dude, it's like the greatest possible reality that exists. But it's, it's, it's, it's something that, well, I want to get back to something, which is, you said, you know, we were talking about like people and their behavior and you're talking about these clubs and men and doing these terrible things. And you have to understand, think about the whole time you've been alive. All right. Right. The whole time you've been alive, there's always been sick, crazy stuff, right?

31:40 Adam Yes.

31:42 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Has it diminished at all?

31:44 Adam Not really.

31:45 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Has it about stayed the same and maybe even just only gotten worse?

31:50 Adam It probably gets worse, but our tolerance level, we're able to accept more. Because we just start, so here's the deal. It's how a guy gets fat.

31:59 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Here's the deal.

32:00 Adam He doesn't put a hundred pounds on on a weekend. He puts on eight pounds a month over the course of six years.

32:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce So here's the deal, here's the deal. It's gonna get really worse.

32:11 Adam Yeah.

32:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And then the tolerance, but the worst part will get worse and the tolerance won't get as acceptable.

32:19 Adam Right.

32:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And that's when like more 9-11 things are gonna happen. Like, I don't mean terrorist attacks. I mean just horrible, terrible earthquakes and fires and things like that. In your lifetime.

32:33 Adam Oh, we look forward to that soon?

32:34 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce In your lifetime. These things are gonna happen.

32:37 Adam All right, all right. All right, so this happened, this is the apocalypse, right?

32:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, no. No, no, no. This is called the end times.

32:43 Dr. Bruce The end times.

32:45 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce See how he and I know and you don't? Isn't that funny?

32:48 Adam Yeah.

32:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Read the book of John.

32:50 Adam Not funny, haha, funny, weird, but yeah. Yeah, it's like the fifth Baldwin over here.

32:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Praise the Lord.

32:56 Adam He's the Baldwin in every guy I just know what you're thinking.

32:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'll tell you what. Here's the thing that's so cool that he knows and I know. Ready? The fellowship and the brethren that we share, me and this young man, is closer than paternal brothers. How hardcore is that?

33:15 Adam You know, because I know that communist atheist, Alec, doesn't share any of these beliefs. He's over there trying to save the whales.

33:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I don't know about communist atheist, but I'd say that's a bit of an exaggeration, but go ahead.

33:31 Adam He ain't thumping the Bible, that boy, though.

33:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yo, did you find my boy on Vans?

33:35 Adam He's out trying to save the rainforest.

33:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Did you find it?

33:38 Adam And don't get me wrong, Alec, you know, dear, dear friend, just like Kathy Griffin.

33:42 Dr. Bruce Just like Kathy Griffin.

33:43 Adam Yes. Ran into him at the airport some years ago, by the way. Had a enjoyable conversation. Lex Luthor? The Alec, yeah, is that what you call him?

33:51 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I call him Lex Luthor.

33:52 Adam He's a, and by the way, just a quick shout out to Alec. Career, really having a renaissance, not that it ever went away, but wow, just heating up with a lot of interesting roles and movies over the last year or so.

34:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Just won some big award in New York.

34:09 Adam Is that for The Cooler?

34:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, just won some huge award for The Cooler.

34:13 Adam Yeah, yeah, it's nice.

34:14 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And he's got a, he's got that-

34:17 Adam How's he doing with the Borg?

34:18 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That big Mike-

34:18 Adam With the Borg again and stuff.

34:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That big Mike Myers movie just came out. That he was in?

34:23 Adam Oh yeah, yeah, Can the Hat. Yeah, guy's on fire.

34:26 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, he's doing well. He's a talented kid.

34:28 Adam Yeah, and he's okay with the born again stuff.

34:31 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He crapped in the bed.

34:32 Adam I think that may have been him.

34:35 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, from what movie is that? That may have been him.

34:39 Adam When he was in here.

34:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Oh, he's in The Other Room.

34:42 Adam We get other bald ones on occasion.

34:43 Do you own a ranch in Ojai?

34:46 Adam That's him.

34:47 Caller I heard that.

34:47 Adam You heard? You know that voice, right?

34:49 Do you own a ranch in Ojai?

34:50 Adam That was the voice you heard over your bunk right before he gave you a good ass whooping when you were 11, right?

34:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Crap in the bed.

35:00 Dr. Bruce Well, so much for Born Again, huh?

35:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, so the boys are, the family's kind of like being very influenced, actually.

35:10 Adam Oh, really?

35:11 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Absolutely.

35:11 Adam Really?

35:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce As you will too, Adam, actually.

35:15 Adam There's Daniel and there's Billy, right? Now, here's my point. I don't know Daniel Baldwin and I don't know Billy Baldwin. I do know Alec Baldwin and my sense is you might win over Daniel and Billy, I don't think you'll totally win over, but he'll be polite and just say, yeah, I'm into God too. Alec, that's not gonna work. He's too busy out there with his crazy liberal Hollywood friends out there trying to take down the man. He ain't into God.

35:47 Dr. Bruce God's the hound of the, what do they call him?

35:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's into God, man, he's gonna take a little more time to come to Jesus, Adam.

35:56 Adam Yeah, you have to show him the path to righteousness.

35:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, no, no, the Holy Spirit will show him the path.

36:01 Adam Right, right now he's-

36:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I just have to be an example.

36:04 Adam Yeah, he's getting hopped up on Zemas and chasing skirts right now. You're gonna have to steer him back.

36:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce On what?

36:11 Adam He likes Zema. That's his drink.

36:14 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's sober longer than I am.

36:16 Adam Oh, he is?

36:16 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You're friggin a cuck.

36:17 Adam All right, he's always sober, big deal. How long's he, you've been sober for how long?

36:24 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce 15 years.

36:25 Adam 15 years and how long's Alec been sober?

36:28 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Like 18 or 19 years.

36:30 Adam I gotta get back on the booze. Let's take a little break.

36:34 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You're a sick man, Corolla.

36:36 Adam Stephen Baldwin here. And what about Daniel Baldwin and Billy Baldwin? Are they drinking, are they sober? I know Daniel had a little run in. Billy's, Billy's normal. Yeah. I would call him the most normal of the Baldwin brothers. Slash boring.

36:51 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's the quietest of the Baldwin brothers.

36:54 Adam All right, that's boring. Stephen Baldwin in here from Celebrity Mole, Yucatan, Wednesday nights, ABC, 10 o'clock. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

37:05 Caller Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

37:27 Adam The only Baldwin with ADD.

37:29 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I was gonna say, I met somebody with reverse ADHD.

37:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's gotta be Greco. The last name has to be Greco.

37:35 Adam Stephen Greco? No.

37:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The dude I was just telling you about. Jimmy Dude, we just went to the Vans website, and I can't, like, I'm looking for gnarly photos of you, dog, and I can't find nothing. Jimmy Greco.

37:49 Adam Yeah, listen, you think this is your personal intercom?

37:53 Dr. Bruce Bite him in.

37:54 Adam How dare you?

37:54 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm having a party over here at K... At Loveline, baby. All right, so, Greco, you're a gnarly dog, and I'm gonna see you here tonight. Whatever.

38:04 Adam All right. Cabin Fever, everybody.

38:07 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Why do you...

38:07 Dr. Bruce Do you want me to read that again?

38:08 Adam I don't do anything.

38:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Why do you have to talk about Cabin Fever so much?

38:12 Adam Because it's a promotion that we're doing that I don't get paid for, ironically. But it's a promotion we're doing where...

38:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Isn't he a dork?

38:20 Adam Slip that in.

38:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce This is the best.

38:21 Adam I thought you got paid when you did these things. All right. Anyway, the point is you get a DVD. If you call in tonight, you're over 18, you get a DVD. The movie has to be good because Stephen Baldwin's dear, dear, dear, dear friend produced it.

38:35 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Jeff Hoffman.

38:36 Adam Jeff Hoffman.

38:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's the best.

38:38 Adam You want to give a shout out to Jeff Hoffman?

38:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, I want to give a shout out to Jimmy Greco. Dude, anyone can hear my voice right now, Jimmy Greco rocks.

38:47 Adam Having fever is another thing that rocks.

38:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Search for him on your Internet because he's shredding for the Vans skate team, doggies.

38:56 Adam All right, but let me finish the plug for your other girlfriend.

38:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's probably going to like see me and just punch me in the head later.

39:01 Dr. Bruce Why don't you get his home phone out? Maybe somebody can call him.

39:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's got to call me.

39:04 Adam Don't, don't, don't, don't encourage him.

39:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce How do I get him to call in? What do I do?

39:08 Adam Let me, let me finish this crappy plug before I kill myself. Cabin Fever. And I don't get, you don't get to go to heaven if you kill yourself, by the way.

39:16 Dr. Bruce You want me to read that for you?

39:17 Adam Yeah, go ahead and read that and hurry.

39:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'll read it.

39:19 Dr. Bruce No, I want to read it.

39:20 Adam All right, go ahead.

39:21 Dr. Bruce You're the guest. Go ahead.

39:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, and then, well, you read it and then I'll just do it better. Go ahead.

39:26 Adam Yeah, show them how an actor does it.

39:28 Dr. Bruce All callers who get in the air tonight will receive a Cabin Fever DVD and a chance to win a trip for four.

39:34 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Dude, that was terrible. Stick to the latest.

39:37 Dr. Bruce I just want to make you look good.

39:38 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Stick to the latest. All callers who get on the air tonight will receive a Cabin Fever DVD and will get a chance to win a trip for four to a ski vacation in Whistler.

39:47 Adam That's a pro.

39:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The prize will include airfare lift tickets and a cabin. The Cabin Fever DVD will be available in stores on January 20th. The winner will be announced next Sunday, January 25th.

40:00 Adam You're gonna have to be over 18.

40:04 Dr. Bruce Stephen Baldwin, he's gonna win the little Baldwin there.

40:07 Adam Stephen, that was wonderful. I just want to get a wild, let's get a couple of wild lines. Just give me three includes. I think we'll go ahead and paste that in. Go ahead.

40:15 Dr. Bruce What do I do? Include.

40:16 Adam The word include got a little screwed up here. Just three wild lines. Just give me, just give me include. Okay, ready? Yeah.

40:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Includes. Includes. Includes.

40:28 Adam Okay, great, buddy. You're wrapped.

40:29 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Thanks, buddy.

40:31 Adam See, that's how it works.

40:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, that's pretty good. Let me hear that again.

40:36 Do you own a ranch in Ojai?

40:38 Do you own a ranch in Ojai?

40:40 Adam Wow.

40:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's pretty good, huh?

40:42 Adam Yeah. The Baldwin sound alike. Well, actually, you and Alec probably look alike more so than Billy and Daniel. Is there a fifth one that I'm missing?

40:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, he's sitting right over here.

40:56 Adam Oh, yeah, that's right. The fifth one. The only Baldwin that never got laid. Baldwin. Oh, Bruce Baldwin, everybody.

41:05 Dr. Bruce My board certified addiction medicine specialist. Yeah. I'm here as a professional, so I can't lower myself.

41:11 Adam All the Baldwins got done using dad's van. They throw the keys to Bruce. Be like, clean it up before you bring it back.

41:17 Dr. Bruce Yeah. I know where he's from on Long Island, Massapequa. I know what you're all about.

41:21 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Where are you from?

41:22 Dr. Bruce Jericho.

41:24 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, then I know what you're all about.

41:27 Adam It's a bad city. Brian?

41:29 Yes?

41:30 Adam You're 19?

41:32 Caller Great to be on the air with you tonight.

41:33 Adam It's great to have you.

41:34 All right.

41:35 Adam This is a little something we call Germany or Florida, Stephen. All bizarre stories either emanate from Germany or Florida. Brian will tell us the story. We'll decide. Is it Germany or Florida? All right. Ready? That's your cue.

41:54 Caller An 11-year-old girl is accused of selling heroin on the street for a mother, sometimes dressed in her school uniform or nightgown, police said Tuesday. Investigators and prosecutors were deciding.

42:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Germany or what?

42:06 Adam Florida. Mm-hmm.

42:07 Caller It's Florida.

42:09 Adam Yeah. It smells like Florida to me, too, but we've been wrong the last few nights.

42:14 Caller It's Florida.

42:15 Dr. Bruce It's Florida.

42:16 Adam Stephen says Florida. Bruce, Florida. I'm going to go Florida as well. Brian?

42:21 Dr. Bruce I'm going to say Florida.

42:21 Adam Yes.

42:22 Dr. Bruce And you're right.

42:24 Adam Yeah. Thank you very much.

42:27 Dr. Bruce He's teching them.

42:27 Adam Stephen knows. Yes. Stephen, you're batting a thousand in Germany and Florida. Stephen, are you making another personal phone call? What is going on? You understand this goddamn radio show? What about your faith? Who are you calling?

42:43 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Oh, I'm dragging something off the thing here. I'm calling little Jimmy.

42:48 Adam Let's put the phone down.

42:49 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I will. Hold on.

42:51 Adam You can make your phone calls during the break.

42:53 Dr. Bruce Maybe if I stun him with a laser, he'll like sit still.

42:56 Adam That's it. Good. Spencer, you're 15?

43:00 Caller Yeah.

43:01 Adam What's happening?

43:03 Caller Yeah. I was wondering. I was playing pool the other night with my friends and like we got into a game like for money. It started out like $5 or $10 and by the end of the night it was like up to $100 and I ended about, I was down like $30 by the end of the night, but I just kept on betting and betting until I was in lots of debt. I was wondering if that was maybe like compulsive gambling or something.

43:29 Adam What about gambling addiction?

43:31 Dr. Bruce I've been doing some little interesting research on gambling and it clearly is an addictive behavior and as with other addictive behaviors, loss of control is one of the prominent features and it's certainly gambling in adolescence is becoming a real problem.

43:46 Adam Oh, really?

43:47 Dr. Bruce Yeah, especially with the internet access to gambling sites, gambling on sports events. And the first thing I'd ask you, do you have a family, you know, what's your family of origins like and do you have a family history of addictions? Any alcoholics?

43:59 Caller Well, yeah, my grandpa is an alcoholic.

44:02 Dr. Bruce And what kind of a family do you grow up and was it fairly rigid or was it chaotic? Real structured?

44:07 Not really.

44:09 Adam You couldn't have hung up the phone any more quietly than that, you had to slam it down like some police commissioner who just got bad news.

44:14 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I was talking to Jimmy and I got the last name right, dude, Jimmy Greco, doggies.

44:19 Adam Yes.

44:19 Dr. Bruce He's his bookie.

44:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He rocks.

44:24 Adam Thank you.

44:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, he rocks. This kid's sick.

44:27 Dr. Bruce So Spencer.

44:28 Caller Yeah. Oh, yeah, Stephen, I saw you in Half Baked the other day. You were the MacGyver Stoner.

44:34 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What did you think, dude?

44:35 Caller That was high quality, grade A performance.

44:38 Adam Now wait a minute. You can't do any more of these kind of movies now that you've found Jesus Christ.

44:43 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's correct.

44:44 Adam You can't do it. These are sinful movies, yes?

44:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, I don't even try to figure out if they're sinful or whatever. It has nothing to do with that. I can't really associate myself with anything that doesn't support my faith.

45:01 Adam So you don't want to do any, you don't do any like pot smoking, burnout movies?

45:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No.

45:06 Adam You can't play any junkies or gays or anything like that?

45:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You won't be seeing me in the sequel to The Usual Suspects, in other words.

45:13 Adam Well, but now what about that? The, is something like The Usual Suspects. I mean, you played a criminal, but I don't believe your character was, you know, I don't know, you weren't raping kids or anything. You were just like kind of a thought.

45:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce This is another, you know, this is another interesting topic about Hollywood and actors and people who are calling themselves Christians. You know, I go by the book, buddy. I go by the book.

45:38 Adam What is that? Is that a Bible?

45:39 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's a Bible, son. It's the word of the Lord. I got it. It's the rule book, Adam. Let's do a Bible.

45:46 Adam Let's do a Bible test. I bet that you can flick to some random page of that Bible that Bruce could read it out loud into the microphone and it would make sense. There would be something poignant. There'd be something that has to do with some of the calls we got tonight or the theme of the show. What do you think about that challenge?

46:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I think it's brilliant.

46:07 Adam Flip it open. Let me just flip it to a right now. No looking through it. That's just that I'm just going to shout out a page. All right. A page. Yeah.

46:16 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, no, this is going to be from the Holy Spirit.

46:17 Adam I go with that. I can feel the Holy, the voice of the Holy Spirit pushing through me. We got to take a break. I'm going to say page 222.

46:26 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Old Testament. No problem.

46:28 Adam All right. We'll take a quick break. Stephen Baldwin is here. Why don't we come back? A very dramatic reading of the Bible.

46:35 Dr. Bruce Do I get to read it without him interrupting me again?

46:36 Adam Yes. Yes, you do. Cut.

46:38 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Deuterometry, bro. Take a quick break.

46:41 Adam We'll be right back.

46:50 Caller With Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew, one of our five alternative San Francisco Rhymes.

47:22 Adam That's Dr. Bruce.

47:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Deuteronomy.

47:24 Adam Filling in for Dr. Drew.

47:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Deuteronomy.

47:27 Adam And that's about as good a job as he's doing, seeing that Deuteronomy kind of job. Stephen Baldwin is here. Stephen, who's recently found Jesus Christ. He's always known him, but he was reacquainted with him a few years back.

47:39 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I don't know about that. Recently.

47:41 Adam A couple years.

47:42 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Recently, Jesus Christ found me.

47:45 Adam That's right.

47:46 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce How cool is that, dude?

47:47 Adam That's a good answer.

47:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Isn't that cool?

47:48 Adam Now you didn't go find him. He found you.

47:51 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's a predestined reality, Adam.

47:53 Adam Right. And I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I do. And Stephen is actually, he walks the walk, and not only talks the talk, he packs a Bible with him.

48:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Anybody that can hear my voice, go to a website called livingitthemovie.com. But it's living without the G, L-I-V-I-N-I-T, livingitthemovie.com, to check out a gnarly skate BMX DVD that I put together with all skateboarding Christian and BMX dudes that finally, there's gonna be a gnarly core sports movie out there with Christian dudes who are getting down for Jesus. And it's not gonna be that cheesy Christian, you know what, that is all this country has produced over the last hundred years.

48:43 Adam Well, you know, I like that.

48:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce This is the new wave, the new movement of Christianity America.

48:49 Adam And when you say movement, you don't mean that in the number two kind of way, you mean it is more of a revolution, right?

48:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, you know, it depends on the eyes and the ears that you have to hear and see with there, Adam.

49:00 Adam Right.

49:01 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm speaking spiritually, of course, so.

49:03 Adam I understand.

49:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Your interpretation is something else.

49:06 Adam Let me ask you this, what about the muscle men for Jesus Christ, the guys who get out there, they take a phone book, they rip it in half, they take a baseball bat, they try to snap it over their head while the other ones are screaming religious chants at them. You ever see those guys? You never seen those guys?

49:24 Dr. Bruce Yeah, those guys are on cable. It's like the Tammy Faye channel. I think it's the same vein.

49:28 Adam It's huge, pumped up guys who, they're power lifters and they're like lifting for Jesus. And the guys like blow up that hot water bottle, brother. All right, brother. And he starts blowing it. His face starts turning red. His bowels start pushing out through his anus. And the other guy starts screaming at him, do it for JC. And everyone goes nuts. And then he blows up the hot water bottle and then he starts pumping and screaming and bending rebar over his head. It's great. Right. I don't know what it has to do with religion exactly, but he's getting the kids pumped up.

50:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I do my own thing.

50:01 Adam Okay, I'm just saying.

50:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce But I don't judge others.

50:04 Adam You don't judge, that's my thing. I don't judge.

50:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The Lord is a great mystery, Adam.

50:08 Adam I don't judge.

50:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce We'll never understand what he's doing or how he's doing it.

50:12 Adam Right, we won't. But I'll tell you one thing we might understand. We might get some clarity because before we went to break, I took a look at Stephen's Bible and I had a strong feeling. And once in a while, I'll even break into tongues.

50:27 Caller Shandala, shandala!

50:31 Adam Anyway, I worked with a guy named Frank who broke into tongues, but all he said was shandala, shandala.

50:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Praise the Lord.

50:38 Adam That's all I can say. So anyway, Stephen brought a Bible. I said turn to page 222 because I had a feeling.

50:47 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Deuteronomy.

50:48 Adam And then Dr. Bruce would read it and somehow it would make sense. Do you understand that it would be germane to what we've spoken about tonight?

50:59 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Bro, this is unbelievable.

51:02 Adam Really?

51:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Okay, you ready? Ready? Now you gotta shut your fat face. Okay, because let me tell you something.

51:10 Adam Go ahead, read from the Bible.

51:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What you did is now you're doing your Corolla thing right now, right? And the Lord is speaking to you.

51:19 Adam What does he say?

51:21 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Deuteronomy, okay? And this is out of the 28th chapter, the 27th verse on page 222.

51:31 Adam That was my page.

51:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The Lord will smite you with the boils of Egypt and the tumors and with the scab and with the itch from which you cannot be healed.

51:44 Adam Wow.

51:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Let me see that last part again. From which you cannot be healed. The Lord will smite you with madness and with blindness, with bewilderment of heart, et cetera, et cetera. Are you kidding me?

51:58 Adam We're talking about anal sex and festering oils and stuff.

52:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You know, the kid called up about the itch.

52:04 Adam He did talk about the itch. That's true.

52:07 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce We talked about the cauliflower before.

52:09 Adam That's right.

52:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce All right.

52:10 Adam That's true.

52:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce So then it jumps to the 45th verse, which is, this is like, I like when the Lord just kind of throws it down, like hardcore.

52:20 Adam Yeah.

52:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It says here, So all these curses shall come on you and pursue you and overtake you until you are destroyed because you would not obey the Lord your God by keeping his commandments and the statutes which he commanded you. They shall become a sign and a wonder on you and your descendants forever.

52:45 Adam I picked a heavy page.

52:46 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Because you did not That wasn't a fluff page. Because you, I spoke in tongues. Because you did not serve Because you did not serve the Lord your God with joy and a glad heart. For the abundance of all things, therefore you shall serve your enemies whom the Lord will send against you.

53:08 Adam All right. So I picked a meaningful page. Because there's gotta be five, 600 pages there, right?

53:14 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What were the odds? What were the odds that you said page 222 will be a page that references what we've been talking about tonight and specifically the word itch, which was in a conversation tonight, was in the paragraph, the first paragraph of page 222. Now here's the problem. Here's the problem, Adam. Just like when 9-11 happened and everybody went, oh, isn't that terrible?

53:44 Caller What's for lunch?

53:47 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce See now you're gonna walk away tonight and go, hmm, I guess that was a little weird. Or maybe not even like consider that at all as some interesting coincidence. What were the odds that you jokingly said, turn to page 222, because I think it's gonna reference this conversation tonight, and the word itch?

54:06 Adam All right, but here's what I'm saying. What if I turned to page 114?

54:10 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hold on a sec, buddy. Out of over 1300 pages in the book I'm holding, Holy mackerel. You picked the one that referenced the word itch.

54:21 I have an itchy, itchy rash.

54:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Is that a coincidence?

54:24 Adam No, I believe I'm a- No, I'm a prophet. Is that what you're looking for? No. Yeah, I don't know. It probably is a coincidence. I don't know. I don't know what the rest of the pages say. There could have been a juicy morsel on every page. That's all I'm saying.

54:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You said turn to page 222, cause I have a feeling it's gonna reference our conversation.

54:47 Adam Well, that's true.

54:48 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And you know what? And if it didn't reference it, you'd have been like, ha ha, who are you?

54:52 Adam Yeah, all right.

54:53 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce All right. But it very ridiculously specifically referenced the conversation.

54:58 Adam It was interesting that there's not a lot of-

55:00 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It used a word that we used in our, itch. Next caller!

55:05 Adam Not a lot of itchy conversations going on in the Bible, I'd imagine. No? All right. All right, good. All right, I'm a new man. Javier? You're 24?

55:17 Caller Yeah.

55:19 Adam You read that eating peaches can raise your sperm count?

55:22 Caller Well, I read it in a men's health magazine. I mean, I read it a while back, and I've always wondered that if that was true or not, and some nutritionists or doctors, whatever, said that it was. And I was like, okay.

55:35 Adam Well, what do you need to hire? First off, you're, what are you, you're Mexican?

55:41 Javier?

55:42 Caller Hispanic?

55:43 Yeah.

55:44 Adam You got plenty high sperm count. Yeah, you got very, very, very people.

55:47 Dr. Bruce 10 million sperm in an ejaculate.

55:48 Adam Yeah, you got 10 million at each, each hamper load. What do you want, 14 million?

55:53 Caller Well, let me tell you the, let me tell you the fact. Well, it's because I'm married and, you know, me and my wife are trying to have a child. But the thing is that if I've heard people have low sperm count and some have high sperm count, do you get what I'm saying?

56:07 Adam Yes, it does vary. You're a 24 year old guy. You don't do any, you don't do any drugs?

56:12 Caller No, I don't.

56:13 Adam All right, you're fine.

56:15 Dr. Bruce Yeah, like some people have a high IQ and some people have a low IQ, but 99% of them are used.

56:19 Adam Now you're insulting the man. No, here's the point. He's saying you have a low IQ. I don't believe that. I refuse to believe that. Uh-oh, now with that goofy laugh, I think maybe you do. But here's the point. Here's the point. You will get your wife praying in plenty soon. I don't know how long have you been trying?

56:35 Caller Uh, about four months maybe.

56:37 Adam Okay, and you know when to do it, right?

56:39 Caller Well, of course.

56:40 Adam All right, and not in the back door either, right? All right there, buddy. Look, you try for what? A year, and if it doesn't happen, doesn't you go in and see a fertility doctor?

56:52 Caller Uh-huh.

56:53 Adam Bruce, I'm talking to you.

56:54 Dr. Bruce Yeah, a year.

56:56 Adam He's 24, he's fine.

56:57 Dr. Bruce Yeah, some foods are, I don't know what the correlation is, but what did you mention?

57:03 Adam Peaches, pears?

57:05 Dr. Bruce I wouldn't worry about it. I just eat a healthy diet, and your body is fully capable of producing very healthy sperm without any kind of nutritional supplement.

57:12 Adam That's right. I mean, listen, your body, you can eat like a bark and berries and roaches and crap.

57:19 Dr. Bruce Well, today, yeah, there are very few people who have significant nutritional deficiencies.

57:24 Adam Is our sperm count getting lower though? I've always heard that. Is that heading down?

57:30 Dr. Bruce It's whose?

57:31 Adam Our, I don't mean me, me and you.

57:33 Dr. Bruce No, I know. Me and your sperm. Our society? No.

57:35 Adam Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was too confusing, the phrasing of the question. Is it our personal sperm?

57:41 Dr. Bruce No, I'm saying, I've never heard anything indicate it.

57:42 Adam Last time I counted tallied up our sperm, I heard it was, I heard as a society, it was sort of edging down.

57:48 Dr. Bruce No, not aware of that.

57:49 Adam Not aware of that.

57:49 Dr. Bruce Is that, did Drew say anything?

57:51 Adam Drew didn't say anything. I mean, you just, you hear studies, you talk about, you know, societal pollutants, environmental stuff, ball nuggers, that kind of stuff. You know, sitting too close to the TV. Stephen, you got kids, right?

58:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yes, sir.

58:03 Adam You're done with your sperm. You don't need it anymore.

58:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, I'm going again.

58:07 Adam Oh, are you? How many kids do you have?

58:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Two daughters.

58:10 Adam Two daughters. You want a son? Doesn't matter.

58:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Whatever the Lord brings me, Adam.

58:14 Adam Oh, that's what, that's the attitude I need. That's just talking to somebody about it.

58:18 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm sorry, would you say that again, please?

58:20 Adam That's just the attitude I need. I was just talking to someone at work about spinning the sperm to get a boy and doing all that stuff.

58:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Right, right, right, right. In vitro.

58:28 Adam How's that work, Bruce? Can you spin them? Can you get a boy's sperm?

58:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Sperm separation, yeah, they do that.

58:34 Adam Sperm separation, how's that work? Beat off into a colander, how does that work? I'm gonna try it anyway.

58:41 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I don't know how that works.

58:42 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Into a centrifuge.

58:43 Adam Centrifuge, you spin it around. Listen, you got Stephen Baldwin over here, the guy was in biodome, he's telling you what, he knows more about doctoring than you do.

58:52 Dr. Bruce He knows more about centrifuging.

58:54 Adam No kidding. What's up with you? Come on, Bruce.

58:57 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I only look stupid.

58:58 Adam No, I know, you're twice as smart as Bruce over here, claims to be a doctor.

59:03 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Bruce rocks.

59:03 Adam He looks at me cross-eyed.

59:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Don't ever come back here again.

59:07 Adam You're not welcome, you're not welcome here anymore. No, Drew.

59:11 Dr. Bruce Drew's not welcome.

59:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Drew's out.

59:13 Dr. Bruce Drew's the man.

59:14 Adam Change the locks on the doors.

59:16 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm serious.

59:16 Adam And if he has a parking space, which I know he doesn't have, but if he had one, let's cross his name out.

59:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Drew is evil.

59:24 Adam How dare you. And you know why? I'll tell you why, because Drew is half Jew and half, half Drew. Half Drew. No, he's half Jew and half Drew. Yeah, that's what he is. He's pagan is what he is.

59:40 Dr. Bruce No, he and I have the same.

59:41 Adam He's pagan.

59:42 Dr. Bruce My father's Jewish, my mother's.

59:44 Adam He doesn't, but he didn't embrace the Lord like you did. That's right. He followed, he went the way the, he went the path. The secular path.

59:52 But why don't you got no play, playa?

59:54 Adam Look at him, he thinks he's black. Yeah, he's gotta go. He's, he's, he's, he has no spirituality whatsoever.

1:00:02 Dr. Bruce Oh, he's very spiritual.

1:00:03 Adam I try to spread the, I do.

1:00:04 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Is he?

1:00:05 Adam No, he's not.

1:00:06 Dr. Bruce He's spiritual from?

1:00:07 Adam No.

1:00:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce A medical standpoint.

1:00:09 Right.

1:00:09 Adam He's a man of science.

1:00:10 Dr. Bruce Yes, I'm a scroller.

1:00:11 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's a man of the world.

1:00:13 Adam Marilyn.

1:00:14 Yes.

1:00:15 Adam You're 18?

1:00:16 Caller Yes.

1:00:17 Adam What's up?

1:00:20 Caller I've had a problem with depression for like four years.

1:00:24 Adam Yes, I read that Bible, baby doll.

1:00:26 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's right.

1:00:28 Caller And I have to take medication, but when I take it, I have no sex drive.

1:00:33 Dr. Bruce What are you taking?

1:00:35 Caller I'm taking Wellbutrin and Paxil.

1:00:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Why both?

1:00:41 Dr. Bruce Well, there are two different types of antidepressants. You have the Paxil serotonin reuptake inhibitor and-

1:00:46 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Wellbutrin's for ADD.

1:00:48 Dr. Bruce Well, Wellbutrin's at atypical antidepressants. It's not the usual type of antidepressants. The only drug in the class that it's in, and it inhibits epinephrine reuptake. It's more epinephrine and dopamine. So it doesn't generally affect sex drive. And if physicians are treating somebody with depression and they're on an SSRI like Prozac or Zoloft or one of those things, then- I've been on that before. Excuse me?

1:01:11 Caller I've been on that before.

1:01:13 Dr. Bruce Right. So what I'm saying, though, is if you could be on Wellbutrin alone as an antidepressant, you wouldn't have the problems with sex drive. It's one of those that's recommended for people that really complain a lot about the sexual side effects of the SSRIs. Uh-huh. And it affects sex drive and also-

1:01:31 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What's the other one you're on, Wellbutrin and what?

1:01:33 Caller Paxil.

1:01:34 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce The Paxil's whack.

1:01:36 Adam Have you taken that?

1:01:37 Caller Yeah.

1:01:38 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I have friends that, you know-

1:01:41 Dr. Bruce Have they tried you on Wellbutrin alone, without the Paxil?

1:01:45 Caller Yeah.

1:01:46 Dr. Bruce And what happened? It just didn't work, wasn't enough?

1:01:48 Caller No.

1:01:49 Adam All right. So how about, and what's Viagra do for women these days? Anything? I hear about that. I tell women to take some Viagra.

1:01:59 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Give me another page, Drew.

1:02:01 Adam All right.

1:02:02 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's time to get back to the Bible.

1:02:03 Adam Drew, I'm Adam.

1:02:05 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Adam.

1:02:06 Dr. Bruce Have you talked, just, recommendation, I would go back to your psychiatrist and talk to him about the problem, and maybe he could try you on a different antidepressant. Some have less sexual side effects than others. And have you discussed it with him?

1:02:20 Caller Yes, I have. Yes.

1:02:23 Adam Okay, listen. I would start yelling at you if you weren't clinically depressed.

1:02:28 Caller Yeah, I am.

1:02:29 Dr. Bruce No, it's a serious problem, and it's a huge quality of life issue with somebody that's already has a depression problem.

1:02:34 Adam Okay, what about this? What about this? I know Stephen's gonna give me a hallelujah, but it's like... Well, let me finish. I'm finished here. Okay, but it's coming. I'll cue you for the hallelujah here. What is wrong with discipline? I mean, what is wrong with somebody who's depressed, who's young, there's millions of 18 and 19-year-olds who are depressed. What's wrong with setting your alarm clock for 6.45 tomorrow morning, when it goes off, no matter how badly you don't want to get out of bed, you get out of bed and you jog three miles, you come home, you do 30 push-ups and you eat some granola, and you listen to a little classical music and you punch yourself out of it a little bit. I mean, you overcome. Give me hallelujah. And I know you're going to say, well, it's going to be impossible because when that alarm goes off, the person is depressed. I mean, I've been depressed in my life and I know what it's like. It's like your whole body's been... All the guts have been taken out of you and sand has been put back in your body. And it's hard to do, but yet you can push.

1:03:36 Dr. Bruce But clinical depression, you're describing an adjustment to sort of situational depression, and it's physiologically different. In an individual that has vegetative signs, which are problems with loss of appetite, loss of energy, some people are so profoundly weak that they physically... It's not a matter of will, mind over matter.

1:03:56 Adam No, I understand that. I've had that.

1:03:58 Dr. Bruce No, you haven't had that.

1:03:59 Adam Well, how dare you? But yes, my family has a lot... I come from a lot of depression. Not yet, I'll cue you though. I come from a lot of depression and I've had many years where it was almost... life was sort of devastating and everything was wet with sweat.

1:04:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce But you spiritually changed and were able to overcome that because you made money. Yeah, it's like you're saying to me, Hey, I've been short of breath.

1:04:24 Adam No, shush up. Here's what I'm saying. I'm saying I hated my job. My girlfriend dumped me. I was in the worst... I was almost paralyzed. My back hurt, neck hurt, whatever. But I had to go to work. I had to, otherwise I would be in the street. Like I would get up and sit on the end of bed and almost want to cry and just drag my crappy ass from my crappy car to some crappy job. And I would feel all day like I wanted to take a nap. But it's like I sort of was able to push through it. Now, I'm not saying that I was horribly, clinically depressed, but neither is everyone who's calling this show.

1:04:54 Dr. Bruce No, but she probably is. She's probably has severe depression.

1:04:57 Adam She might be, but there's also a lot of people that are on the cusp, you know, who may not be depil- depilitated by it, who really need to sort of kickstart themselves a little. And I don't want to just sound like some Pollyanna-ish gym coach, but there's a part of you that's going to have to discipline yourself.

1:05:14 Dr. Bruce You're absolutely right.

1:05:15 Adam You don't feel like doing it, you must do it. You have to get up, you have to go to work.

1:05:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You sure sound like a gym coach to me, buddy.

1:05:22 Adam That's right.

1:05:23 Dr. Bruce Yeah, you're absolutely right.

1:05:25 Caller Well, my problem is even when I'm on the medication, I've attempted suicide before and I was hospitalized for it twice in like one month. So no matter what I do, it like keeps getting worse and worse over the years, no matter what medication I take.

1:05:41 Adam Alright, were you abused? Were you abused?

1:05:45 Caller When I was younger.

1:05:45 Adam Yeah, well that's...

1:05:46 Dr. Bruce Do you have a family history of depression and or suicide attempts or completions? Okay, so you have the genetics, you had a chaotic family, and you're a setup for this and you probably have the real clinical depression with vegetative signs where you have it affects your appetite, your sleep, your energy level.

1:06:03 Adam Listen, you need to talk to your psychiatrist, by the way, and get your stuff adjusted and stick... And by the way, 18 is a crappy age. Things get better, things get easier if you stick with it. Don't kill yourself.

1:06:16 Dr. Bruce Well, and there are other antidepressants that have less sexual side effects, but you need to get into that with your psychiatrist.

1:06:21 Adam But listen, if you're thinking about killing yourself, the sexual side effect is not really the problem of essence right now. I'm going to ask our guest, Stephen Baldwin of Celebrity Mully, once a night at 10 o'clock. I bet there's something poignant that can be steered toward a young, depressed Marilyn here. I bet we can touch her life in some way if you just open the Bible and turn to page 1136. Bruce probably memorized it.

1:06:53 Dr. Bruce Let me.

1:06:55 Adam Was that old? Is that new?

1:06:56 Dr. Bruce Where are we? Revelation. I think you're in Revelation.

1:06:58 Adam You're in Revelation. Wow, Bruce. Whatever information that young Stephen.

1:07:05 Dr. Bruce We're talking about John. Where's 1136 there, Stephen?

1:07:09 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah, it's John.

1:07:12 Adam I'm good, right? There could be something here, some information that Stephen is going to impart to young Marilyn that's going to help her with her depression.

1:07:20 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Okay, here's the words of Jesus. Ready?

1:07:22 Dr. Bruce I'm ready.

1:07:23 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It says on page 1136, it's John 3, right? We said John 316 before is what he said.

1:07:34 Adam Wow.

1:07:35 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce This is.

1:07:36 Dr. Bruce Now I'm impressed.

1:07:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce This is John, you just said page 1136. Now in every different Bible, 316 is going to be on a various different page based on the translation, right?

1:07:47 Adam Uh-huh.

1:07:47 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What are the odds that you would call that number? And it's John 316, which we talked to earlier today.

1:07:53 Adam Seventy percent.

1:07:55 Dr. Bruce Last one in a million. That's right.

1:07:57 Adam Oh, look at that. Oh, wow. John 3 Corolla Zero.

1:08:03 Dr. Bruce He's still not speechless, folks.

1:08:04 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Wow.

1:08:05 Adam Wow.

1:08:07 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Look at me. Look at me. Look at me. Are you kidding me right now?

1:08:09 Dr. Bruce That's amazing.

1:08:10 Adam Is that great?

1:08:11 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce So it says here at the top of page 1136, Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. And then it goes on to say, Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of flesh is flesh. That which is born of the spirit is spirit. Do not be amazed that I said to you, you must be born again. The wind blows where it wishes and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it comes from and where it is going. So is everyone who was born of the spirit.

1:08:49 Adam I said that that message is telling Marilyn to become a born again Christian.

1:08:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's telling her to become a born again Christian.

1:08:57 Adam That is.

1:08:58 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce If she accepts Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior, and she becomes baptized in the Holy Spirit, the healing power of God could come upon her. Her depression could completely go away and she would may never need any drugs again.

1:09:11 Adam Marilyn, how about it?

1:09:14 Caller No, I'm atheist.

1:09:16 Adam Yeah, well, that's, yeah, you're atheist, right? You're living in your folks' basement and you're thinking about suicide. Where's that got you? How about finding Jesus Christ?

1:09:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Marilyn, you wanna have some fun?

1:09:28 Adam No?

1:09:29 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Just, just, what'd she say, no?

1:09:31 Adam I gotta say. Well, Marilyn.

1:09:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce No, hold on a second, I wanna talk to her for a second. Marilyn, did you say no?

1:09:36 Caller No, I said how?

1:09:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Okay, well, I'm about to tell you. You ready?

1:09:39 Caller Yeah.

1:09:39 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Okay, later on tonight, you listening?

1:09:43 Caller Yes.

1:09:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Later on tonight, because in the Bible it says that the only way to have true faith and belief in God is in order, you have to do it blindly. You have to like almost act as if it's true, whether you believe it or not. That's what it says in the Bible. So you wanna have some fun?

1:10:03 Caller Yeah.

1:10:04 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm gonna tell you the truth right now, are you ready?

1:10:07 Caller Yes.

1:10:08 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Here comes the truth. I don't know if you've ever heard this before, but this is the truth. You ready?

1:10:13 Yep.

1:10:14 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Later on when you're alone and you're by yourself, if you just, even if you don't believe it, if you just say, Jesus Christ.

1:10:22 Adam Oh, come on Anderson, please. Right, I'm sorry.

1:10:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Are you ready?

1:10:26 Yeah.

1:10:26 Adam I'm ready.

1:10:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce If you just ask Jesus Christ to come into your life and to come into your heart, and you say, forgive me of my sins, and I want you to take over my life, and I want you to come in my heart, and you're asking for the love of Jesus to come into your heart and your soul, you know what's going to happen?

1:10:44 Caller I've done that.

1:10:46 Adam What happened?

1:10:48 Caller Nothing.

1:10:50 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You accepted Jesus Christ? You accepted Jesus Christ?

1:10:54 Caller Yes, I did.

1:10:55 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce How long ago?

1:10:57 Caller Like, I've been doing it for a few years, because I've had clinical depression for four years.

1:11:01 Adam What did he look like? What was he wearing? Sandals?

1:11:06 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's being silly. When did you do that?

1:11:09 Caller I did it just, like, one month ago, and then I do it pretty often, but then I became atheist, because I was like, you know, this isn't real.

1:11:18 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Let me ask you a question. But when you do it, do you use the word God, or do you use Jesus Christ?

1:11:24 Caller Jesus Christ.

1:11:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce You do?

1:11:26 Caller Yeah.

1:11:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Alright, and then do you follow it up at all by reading the Word, or reading the Bible, or going to any church at all?

1:11:33 Caller Yeah, I have the Bible in my room.

1:11:35 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And how often do you read it?

1:11:37 Caller Every night.

1:11:39 Adam What?

1:11:39 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Every night.

1:11:40 Caller Yeah.

1:11:41 Adam Do you go to church on Sundays?

1:11:43 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce What's your favorite book?

1:11:46 Caller I don't know.

1:11:47 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce But you read it every night, so you've got to be remembering what you're reading, right?

1:11:51 Caller Pretty much.

1:11:53 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Okay, well, you know what? God's speaking to you tonight, Marilyn.

1:11:56 Adam Hey, Marilyn, I went to page 1136 and it spoke to you. Read your Bible again, please. Take those meds, talk to your shrink. We got to take a break. Hey, listen, Stephen Baldwin. Yeah, Stephen's doing a little storefront preaching here from the Loveline studio.

1:12:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce So, Adam, what about you tonight, brother? What are the odds, 222 and 1136? What are the odds, Adam? I think Jesus is speaking to Adam Carolla tonight more than Marilyn.

1:12:24 Adam It'd be nice.

1:12:24 Dr. Bruce You're going to hear about it after the show, a glass of wine, good porno, and a little masturbation.

1:12:29 Adam Oh, how dare... What'd you say, glass of wine? Oh, no, you're right. That's... Yeah, to me, that's the father, the son, the Holy Ghost. The booze, the sperm, and the porn. All right, that's a holy trilogy for me. Let's take ourselves a little break. Stephen Baldwin here from Celebrity Mole, and we'll be right back.

1:12:55 Caller Love Line is brought to you by YJ.

1:13:07 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline and Adam. That's Dr. Bruce. Praise be. Filling in for Dr. Drew and doing a wonderful job. Stephen Baldwin in tonight. Filling in for Jimmy Swagger and doing a wonderful job.

1:13:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Praise the Lord.

1:13:23 Adam Stephen can be found on Celebrity Mole. That is ABC Wednesday nights at 10 o'clock. Corbin Burnson is there.

1:13:32 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Hey, anybody that can hear the sound of my voice right now, should check out a website called living at themovie.com. L-I-V-I-N-I-T, themovie.com. And if you really want to get down, you can also go to a thing called longbeachdistribution.com because that's some other stuff I'm doing with some skaters called King of Kings Clothing and Reliance Skateboards. It's gnarly. Check it out. And then if you really, really, really want to get down, you can check out legitskateco.com. Legit. Skate. Co.

1:14:09 Adam When did you get in all the skating stuff ?.com.

1:14:12 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Dude, I told you, I made this movie, like a documentary about skateboarding evangelists that, you know, cause I became a boarding and Christian two years ago and like I went out and looked around about what was really cool in the marketplace, like movies, music and all this kind of stuff and tell there's nothing, there was nothing that was hip and now and cool and today that was Christian.

1:14:32 Adam Right.

1:14:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Right. And I thought that sucked.

1:14:35 Adam So it's like, are these guys going like, I'm gonna do this fakey on this half pipe for Jesus Christ?

1:14:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yes.

1:14:41 Adam Really?

1:14:42 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah. And, but dog, they are getting, these are gnarly radical skateboarders. Who don't have to live of the world and all that represents. They can be filled with the Holy Spirit, living for God, not be afraid and still like have a tattoo or a piercing or whatever. They're all ages. I mean, some of them, I mean, Bruce Christman is the gold medalist from the 2001 X Games in BMX.

1:15:10 Adam Right.

1:15:11 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce He's a hardcore born again Christian.

1:15:13 Adam Really?

1:15:13 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Loves the Lord with all his heart.

1:15:14 Adam Did you see that Dogtown movie by the way? That was a great documentary.

1:15:19 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Brilliant.

1:15:20 Adam About the old Dogtown, Venice, all the stuff for the whole skateboarding movement or sort of modern skateboarding movement.

1:15:27 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce liveinatthemovie.com, longbeachdistribution.com, and legitskateco.com people.

1:15:35 Adam David.

1:15:36 Hey.

1:15:36 Adam You're 21?

1:15:38 Caller Yep.

1:15:38 Adam You heard of Bruce, you had a question for Bruce about the UV tattoo removals?

1:15:45 Caller Yeah, I heard from a friend that you can get a UV tattoo that you can't see obviously in the normal light. But if you go under a black light, it's, I don't know, it's there.

1:15:56 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce It's the mark of the beast.

1:15:57 Adam That's right.

1:15:58 Dr. Bruce Yeah, I've heard of those, but I've never had a request to remove one for probably obvious reasons. Unless you're walking around under black lights, you don't have a tattoo.

1:16:06 Adam They just use that kind of the same ink they use?

1:16:09 Dr. Bruce You know, one of the problems with tattooing is there's no standardization. No one has the responsibility to report exactly what's in it. So the FDA doesn't control the production or distribution or sales of it.

1:16:22 Adam Why doesn't it, by the way? I mean, if you think of how involved they are in almost every facet of our lives, I mean, I'm sure they check more into dog food than they do into tattooers ink. Why why not? Why is that regulated?

1:16:36 Dr. Bruce Probably there haven't been many complaints. It started out that it was illegal to get tattoos up until, I don't know, seven, ten years ago was illegal in New York. It's illegal now in Oklahoma. Right now, as far as I know, it's illegal to get a tattoo. So, I think it's one of these things, state by state, it slipped through the cracks. It's being done. One of the concerns was needles that aren't clean. And then when they got the state health, sometimes is much more stringent than the feds would be.

1:17:06 Adam Right.

1:17:06 Dr. Bruce I know in Nevada, they're much more after them for cleanliness and other issues. But then when they got after them for the needles, then they found out they were having multi-use of a vial of ink, so there was some contamination.

1:17:20 Adam Contaminated, perhaps.

1:17:22 Dr. Bruce But right now, from what I've seen, the shops, the guys, El Toro Inkhouse and Tattoo Mania in Hollywood and Outer Limits, the guys that I've dealt with, very clean shops, meticulously kept in.

1:17:35 Adam But no new invisible tattoos?

1:17:37 Dr. Bruce Oh, yeah. Yeah, certainly. There's always talk about, oh, now inks have acrylics in them. That was the other concern, and I was told, I was at a tattoo convention trying to learn more about what's actually in the inks talking.

1:17:49 Adam You're trying to get laid, let's be honest.

1:17:52 Dr. Bruce Far from it. No, really.

1:17:53 Adam You nailed the jigsaw puzzle, Chick.

1:17:55 Dr. Bruce No, I did some gorgeous women walking around with that. But acrylic, the concern was, are you going to laser plastic that's in the skin as a result of the ink? I had one guy that put testers, remember the testers paints and their models? He'd done that in the late 60s and he wanted me to. So I ended up lasering it. Very interesting.

1:18:14 Adam Yeah. Dr. Bruce is going to do a little laser blasting on Stephen's tats, a couple of them.

1:18:21 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah.

1:18:21 Adam Get rid of those. How long do you think it will take to get rid of them? How many sessions before Stephen's are gone?

1:18:27 Dr. Bruce I'd say 10 month apart.

1:18:29 Adam Ten a month apart.

1:18:31 Dr. Bruce And won't be able to tell you ever had a tattoo. Really?

1:18:33 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce And he's doing it free. How cool is that?

1:18:36 Adam First one's free.

1:18:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Praise the Lord.

1:18:38 Dr. Bruce First session's free. Very small, actually.

1:18:41 Adam First session free. He's like a heroin dealer. He gives the school kids the first hit free, let them chase a dragon, get hooked, and then they keep coming back.

1:18:51 Dr. Bruce Like Drew. Drew likes the way he feels in his face. Oh, that's different, though. He doesn't have any tattoos. No, I'll have to write a script and have you read the script or something. Isn't that what they all do?

1:18:59 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Sure.

1:19:00 Adam All right. Let's talk to Sandra over here who's 22 years of age. Sandra? Yeah, and let me ask you guys something. You ever handling a pen or a piece of paper or something and you're just not paying attention all of a sudden you realize you got a little Snuggie on your finger and you start balling it up a little and then you go, wait a minute, who's Snuggie is this? That's not my Snuggie. Who put this Snuggie here? Well, wait, maybe it's my Snuggie. I don't know. Maybe someone else has put on this pen. I just got a little Snuggie thing going on and I was thinking Snuggie could have shot out of my nose, but this could have been up Jed the Fish's nose four hours ago for all I know. You don't know. All right. Now I got the Snuggie thing going now. Go ahead, Sandra.

1:19:46 Dr. Bruce A little tangential.

1:19:47 Last year, I happened to go to a motel with my boyfriend, you know, just spend a couple days there, a weekend there or whatever. And I went to Hot Tub and I got a yeast infection. And this whole time through, I haven't had any health insurance. I haven't been able to get treated. And so, I tried treating myself with, like, Modest Dad. I tried, like, the one dose and then the seven-day dose and three-day dose until I could actually save up the money to go to the doctor and get the, you know, pelvic and everything like that. And then I got treated and then, you know, the discharge turned clear, but then a couple days after I was done with it, me and my boyfriend didn't do anything sexually at all and it turned colored again. But ever since, I haven't really had any symptoms besides colored discharge and I would assume it's still, you know, a yeast infection and everything. And if it actually is, I was just wondering what can happen, you know, to your system down with the uterus and everything.

1:20:41 Dr. Bruce There's no long-term complications. I mean, the problem is, could there be something else causing it? For instance, sometimes the first diagnosis of diabetes is made after somebody has recurrent yeast infections.

1:20:54 Adam So, does a yeast infection in and of itself cause any damage? No. No.

1:20:59 Dr. Bruce And the yeast organism is all over the place. So it has usually more to do with, you know, wearing different type nylons or a pH change down there or something else systemically going on in your body.

1:21:12 Adam What should she do if she doesn't have insurance?

1:21:16 Dr. Bruce Well go to Planned Parenthood, get another pelvic. I mean, you can get a free pelvic somewhere. You just need to have it looked at. There's really, you need to have a doctor examine you or a nurse at least and find out if there's something else. You're describing colors and the way the discharge looks and things like this, you know, it needs to be looked at under a slide. You need to have some cultures done. You need to examine. I mean, there's no way over the radio that we can.

1:21:41 Adam Yeah. Much as we'd like to look at your vagina over the radio, we don't have the technology to afford that just yet.

1:21:47 Dr. Bruce Right.

1:21:48 Adam God willing it's on the way.

1:21:49 Dr. Bruce Yeah. You're diagnosing yourself as having a recurrent yeast infection and asking me if there's any long-term consequences when we really don't know that's what's going on.

1:21:56 Adam All right. Hey, Sandra.

1:21:58 Mm-hmm.

1:21:58 Adam You don't have insurance, right?

1:22:00 No.

1:22:01 Adam Okay. So go to Planned Parenthood. And throw your vulva on the mercy of those good people over there.

1:22:09 Thank you.

1:22:09 Adam All right, baby doll. Well, I'm going to take a break. Stephen is going to wrap out and not be with us the last break. He's got some of the Lord's work to do.

1:22:22 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Thank you, Adam. I appreciate that, brother. Praise the Lord. You're catching on, dude.

1:22:26 Adam Going to a meeting. Going to do a little noshing.

1:22:28 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm going to pray for you, too, Adam.

1:22:29 Adam Will you?

1:22:30 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I am, dude.

1:22:31 Adam Thanks.

1:22:31 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I am because you're obviously such a retard that if you can't see the Lord speaking to you, talked about itch, you say 222, it says itch.

1:22:41 Adam That's true.

1:22:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Talk about John 3 16, you say 1136 and it's John 3 16.

1:22:46 Adam That is true.

1:22:47 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce That's two of the most ridiculous coincidences I ever heard in my life.

1:22:50 Adam Well, maybe I'll get hit by lightning or something on the way home.

1:22:54 Dr. Bruce You know what I've always said to Adam is he doesn't like a lot of Christians. He's known because a lot of them have been inconsistent. They don't walk their talk. But I think knowing you would be a good thing because you seem to be very consistent with what you believe. And I've also said to Adam, if you knew Christ, you'd probably like Christianity. But it's the some of the representatives aren't always the best examples of what it's all about. Unfortunately.

1:23:16 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Well, I think that I think that after tonight, some incredibly supernatural things are going to start to happen around him.

1:23:23 Adam Bruce, what do you think Christ would say about the 17 sugars you put in coffee and then the five packets of sweet and low unacceptable? You think he would do that? He'd forgive him if Christ pulled up a cup of Joe down here.

1:23:35 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I tell you what, I tell you what, I tell you what, you're asking a very, very valid question. What would Christ think of all the sugar Bruce puts in his coffee?

1:23:44 Adam That's right.

1:23:44 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I don't know. When Christ thought about the sin of the world, he allowed himself to be crucified in order to accept it.

1:23:52 Adam Right. But he turned the water into wine, not the coffee and ice cream.

1:23:56 Dr. Bruce You know what Christ would say, he'd say people obviously are judging me because they think I had wine and that's an issue. So he would say it's not what you put in your body, it's the belief, it's your faith that makes you whole and saves your soul.

1:24:11 Adam Come on, read the whole temple. Praise the Lord. All right. Praise the Lord. Stephen Baldwin. God bless you and Godspeed. Celebrity Mole Wednesday nights at 10 o'clock on ABC and one more shout out for the website.

1:24:25 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce Yeah. liveinitthemovie.com, LiveInItWithoutTheG, themovie.com, longbeachdistribution.com, and Legit Skate Co.

1:24:37 Caller Shandala, Shandala, Shandala.

1:25:05 Adam Well, what do you know about that, everybody? Dr. Bruce, man has studied the Bible extensively, yes?

1:25:13 Dr. Bruce Well, yeah, I went to Christian schools my whole life.

1:25:16 Adam It's good to know. All right, Stephen Baldwin has left the building. Him and two Mexican nuns are building a church in the desert. He'll be back upon completion. All right, let's get back to the phones now. I know you want to talk to Casey the dude over here. Doesn't like to have sex with a condom on, but I'm going to talk to Stormy with the big boobs over here. You know why? Cause I'm hetero. Stormy.

1:25:45 Caller Hello.

1:25:47 Adam What is happening?

1:25:49 Caller Well, I have large boobs.

1:25:55 Adam What size are you?

1:25:56 Caller I'm a 34 D.

1:25:58 Adam 34 D. Almost a double D. And here's the thing, folks. I have to remind you, listeners, that you really want to focus on that first number not being so big. A lot of guys, oh, man, she's a 52 D. Now that means she's got a back like a junior college linebacker. You understand? You want that low first number and then you want the D. 34 D. Very solid. How tall are you?

1:26:26 Caller I am 5'4.

1:26:28 Adam 5'4. And how much you weigh?

1:26:31 Caller About 115 pounds.

1:26:32 Adam 113. All right. So you're a petite woman.

1:26:37 Caller Yes.

1:26:38 Adam With a large rack.

1:26:40 Caller Yes, very large.

1:26:41 Adam Excuse me, I have to beat off. Leave your sweat.

1:26:47 Caller It just got to happen one day.

1:26:48 Adam All right. And you're 22. And you want to look into a reduction.

1:26:58 Caller I don't know necessarily if I want a full reduction. I heard there's something called a tuck, like where they pull all the skin up.

1:27:05 Caller But I don't know.

1:27:09 Adam Are you having back problems?

1:27:11 Caller I have back problems.

1:27:13 Caller And I'm a little modest about them.

1:27:15 Adam Big areola? No.

1:27:19 Dr. Bruce Have you had kids?

1:27:20 Adam Just checking.

1:27:20 Caller Yeah, I have a four year old.

1:27:22 Dr. Bruce And did your breast feed for quite a while or? So you've had some drooping also after the... I can see it.

1:27:32 Adam Well, here's what you need to do. Yeah, you need to consult a plastic surgeon. I mean, I've talked to, spoken to Dr. Marcel, who is a resident plastic surgeon, who really, they really are the pimps of the doctor world. Year round tan, pinky ring, open shirt. Just got back from some debaucherous club med type vacation for swingers every time I speak to the guy, pulls up in a Porsche Boxster.

1:28:00 Dr. Bruce Where is the Hippocratic Oath? Jesus Christ.

1:28:04 Adam Hippocratic Oath, he balled it up and smoked it in Jamaica last time he was there trying to swing with some couple.

1:28:10 Dr. Bruce It was like nipping time.

1:28:11 Adam Are you kidding me? Jeez. And now here's, nobody does a lot, also does a lot of work with people of land mines gone off in the rice and stuff. He'll give them a boob job. People that were horribly burned gives him a boob job. He gives everyone a boob job. You know, poor kids from like a former Soviet block countries with cleft palates and hair lips.

1:28:36 Dr. Bruce They come out with breasts.

1:28:37 Adam Boob job. Even the guys, boob job. That's all he knows. But he's, he's pointing is he gives back to the community through boob jobs. So what Stormy needs to do is take a, first you gotta take a picture. Yeah, cause once they're gone, they're gone. And then the second thing you need to do is go in and consult a plastic surgeon. And they'll just tell you what they can and can't do. There's not, according to Dr. When I call him Dr. Marcel, yeah. It was really more the, it's more the bachelor from the flying nun than he is an actual MD. But the point is, Carlos, the swarthy handsome foreigner, remember him? The point is, is you need to go in and just consult a few people. They'll tell you what to do. They don't really have a lift so much as they just, they have an augmentation.

1:29:34 Dr. Bruce Well, reduction is one of the most common procedures they do these days.

1:29:37 Adam I know, but I think there's a little bit of a fallacy that you can just go in there and get a lift.

1:29:42 Dr. Bruce Oh, no, there are women that that's all they have done, especially after childbearing and when the drooping occurs.

1:29:49 Adam So I talked to Marcel about this on more than one occasion. And I don't know. It's not. Here's all I'm saying. It's not as easy as it is. It's it's it's it's not as subtle a procedure.

1:30:01 Dr. Bruce Oh, right, right. There may be moving around some more tissue than you'd expect.

1:30:06 Adam But the point is, I think I think people think you're going to go in. You're going to pinch.

1:30:10 Dr. Bruce Oh, no, no, no, no.

1:30:11 Adam You're going to pull the breast up, sew it up. And that's and you're done. No, I think it's a procedure. But anyway, go in and consult and take a picture for Christ's sake. Casey.

1:30:21 Caller Yeah.

1:30:22 Adam You're 18.

1:30:23 Caller Yeah.

1:30:24 Adam Your girlfriend doesn't like to have sex with a condom.

1:30:26 Caller Nope. She says it ruins the moment.

1:30:29 Adam How long have you been with her?

1:30:31 Caller Two months.

1:30:33 Adam Can she get on the pill?

1:30:35 Caller She she says she is, but she hasn't proved it to me yet.

1:30:39 Adam What is this lack of trust you guys have at the two month mark?

1:30:43 Caller Well, I don't know. I don't want to do it if she's not on the pills because, you know, it's really not safe.

1:30:49 Adam Why would she lie about this? Why don't you trust her? I guess is the question.

1:30:52 Caller Because I don't I don't trust her at all. Like, I've heard that she's cheated on other boyfriends and stuff, so.

1:30:58 Adam OK. Well, look, if you guys it doesn't sound like you got much to build a relationship on here. No. And maybe I'll just break it off. Doesn't seem like you're wildly in love with her. You certainly don't trust her. Why don't you just cut your losses and move on?

1:31:13 Dr. Bruce Because she's hot. Well, you're asking for trouble. That's that's not going to end up in a good way.

1:31:19 Adam Now, look, I'm done talking to Jack. OK, so but here's the thing.

1:31:22 Dr. Bruce Good advice.

1:31:23 Adam You know, a lot of people are in these relationships with I don't trust a person. I think they're lying and they're abusive. Look, if you don't have any kids, you're not married. There's no commitment. You're not, you know, your name's not both down on the deed of some condo or something. Just get out of there. Right. You're young. You move on. That's what you do.

1:31:42 Dr. Bruce But he's young enough to think, oh, she's hot.

1:31:44 Adam There are hot chicks around who will pay attention to you. All right. And by the way, you're going to have difficulty ever getting documentation that she's on the pill. Even if she says she's on the pill or buys the pill or shows you the expired packets, it doesn't mean she's on it. If you don't trust her, then you're not in great shape, so you got to wear the condoms. Yeah.

1:32:04 Dr. Bruce He's going to stop enjoying sex. That's when he'll quit.

1:32:06 Adam All right. Let's talk to Diana. Diana. You're, you want sex all the time before you had a kid. And now you want, you know, what? Now does it just for your boyfriend. All right. You're not into sex anymore. Yeah. How long ago did you have the kid? Postpartum depression. What do you say, Bruce?

1:32:31 Dr. Bruce Well, postpartum depression is, are you, are you depressed? I mean, you're, this doesn't sound like depression right off the bat, but it's very common after pregnancy and after having the child, the dynamics of the relationship change. There are many reasons that it's common for the pattern of having sex and the attraction is much different. All right.

1:32:52 Adam Are you think you're depressed, Diana? Okay. You got, we got ten seconds here. What you do?

1:32:59 Dr. Bruce See the doctor. And also, well, I'd see the doctor.

1:33:04 Adam See the doctor. Maybe he puts you on the pill or something like that, adjusts the hormones.

1:33:08 Dr. Bruce I don't know if she's still breastfeeding or not, but.

1:33:10 Adam That might do something too.

1:33:12 Dr. Bruce Yes.

1:33:13 Adam We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

1:33:15 Here it is.

1:33:16 Adam Bottom line, it sucks being single today.

1:33:18 Caller Tons of lame people and no decent prospects.

1:33:21 Call the Dateline. 1-877-889-DATE.

1:33:27 Caller Loveline will be right back, so get your problems ready.

1:33:49 Adam Hey, yo. This is the born again leader, Ace Rockolla over here. Yeah, I found the Bible. I wanna thank Stephen Baldwin for coming in here and sharing the good news with us. He can be found, I imagine him on, just you and him on a resort, and he's stumped in that Bible for two weeks. Other celebrities are trying to get high and get laid. He's yelling at him about deuteronomy. All right, Stephen Baldwin, dear, dear friend, in here tonight, I want to thank him, Celebrity Mole, ABC, 10 o'clock, Wednesday night, Dr. Bruce, fantabulous job. You coming in tomorrow night? Absolutely. God bless you, buddy. And until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Bruce saying, Shandala, shandala, shandala, mahalo!

1:34:37 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I'm gonna pray for you too, Adam.

1:34:39 Adam Will ya?

1:34:40 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I am, dude.

1:34:41 Adam Thanks.

1:34:41 Stephen Baldwin with Dr. Bruce I am, because you're obviously such a retard.

1:34:47 This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

1:35:44 Caller Get it on.

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Monday, January 19, 2004