Thursday, October 13, 2005

0:52🔗 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience.

0:54🔗 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually-oriented content.

0:58🔗 Voiceover Listen to discretion is advised.

1:00🔗 Voiceover Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.

1:03🔗 Adam Yep, it's the best of Loveline, y'all.

1:05🔗 Drew God bless the best.

1:07🔗 Adam Do not bother calling in because it is the best. Don't believe me, we got Seth Green, My Chemical Romance, Meet the Barkers, Travis and Shana. Is it Shana or Shana?

1:15🔗 Drew I think it was Shana.

1:16🔗 Adam Shana, yeah. Jorge Garcia, the heavy set fella from Lost with the crazy hair. The killers are in here and the Seth McFarlane.

1:24🔗 Drew Oh my God, my lover.

1:25🔗 Adam Going to be doing a little Stewie for us. So this is the Best of and let's get things started with Seth Green. There, buddy, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-L-A-V-E-1-9-1, our Seth Green, in tonight, woo!

1:48🔗 Drew Remember, Seth, last time you were in here, we were doing a test that drove Adam crazy? Yeah. I was doing tests on everyone that came in the show, personality profiles, sort of inventories for attachment issues and substance use and narcissism.

2:00🔗 I tested very high in all areas.

2:01🔗 Drew And he did pretty well, actually. But we used as our controls a group, USC, for Professor Simmons, Professor Arnold's classes. And we want to thank them for participating in the survey.

2:11🔗 Adam Oh, we do.

2:11🔗 Drew That's it. All right.

2:12🔗 Adam And you remember why that test would piss me off, Drew?

2:15🔗 Drew Because it would distract the guest from your genius.

2:19🔗 Adam Remember how many times we had to talk about the test?

2:21🔗 Drew We finally got it. We finally figured it out. Did I?

2:24🔗 Adam About 11, 11 times.

2:26🔗 Drew Oh, no, more than that.

2:26🔗 Adam Drew and I used to get these huge blowouts because Drew would give the guest the test. And the test was four pages. And the guest would take it during the commercial and then into the show. So the guest would just, the show would start and the guest would just be leaned back away from the mic reading this test and checking off boxes and stuff. So eventually, because this is an actual radio show we do, eventually I said, hey, Drew, we can't have the guest doing the test during the actual show because they just, they fade out and they start working on the test. So as I would say to Drew, Drew, you gotta tell him when the, you know, when they come back from commercial, they gotta put the test down. So then after about the eighth time I yelled at him, he told him, but then every time they would still be working on it when we'd come back, and I would just sit there and pout, and I would look at Drew and Drew would be like, what? And I'd be like, Drew, the person's still taking the test. And Drew would go, I did not see that. I didn't see it. And I'd say, but they're two feet away from you and they're holding a pencil. And he'd go, what do you want me to say? I didn't see him do it. And I would yell, you didn't want to see it physically. You saw them.

3:30🔗 I'm incredibly focused on the show and my job.

3:33🔗 Adam Yeah. And then he would go, I am telling you, I did not physically see it. And then I would yell, give me the keys to your car because you can't drive home. If you can't goddamn see someone two feet away doing a test and you can't see past the hood of your car.

3:45🔗 Drew Speaking of driving, you got a ticket.

3:46🔗 Adam Oh, all right. I'm fired up. I got a ticket today driving into work. I remember other work. I was driving into work and I saw a traffic cop, a motorcycle cop had a guy pulled over on Vine in Hollywood and I thought sucker. First thing I thought and the second thing I went through my mind was motorcycle cop pulls you over, you're getting a ticket.

4:15🔗 Drew No matter what.

4:15🔗 Adam Because all those guys do is write, it's a ticket writing party. That's all they do. If you get pulled over, now you might get pulled over by a cruiser once in a while and the guy might say okay take it easy, I'm gonna let you off.

4:24🔗 Drew Why is that?

4:25🔗 Adam Well because the guys on the bikes just write tickets. So if you get pulled over by someone who just writes tickets, you're just gonna get a ticket. So I remember just saying, man, one of those poor son of a bitch got pulled over.

4:38🔗 Drew By the way, when I was hoodwinked into the ticket, two guys on motorcycles.

4:41🔗 Adam Yeah, you get pulled over by a motorcycle, you get a ticket. So just thinking about this guy, when I looked up into my rear view and I saw the lights flickering, another motorcycle, I thought this is a bad sign because I just made the proclamation in my head, motorcycle cop pulls you over, you get a ticket. But then I thought to myself, what? I wasn't doing anything. I was just driving behind the guy, no intersection, no nothing. And I thought, wonder what this could be? Because what the hell is this?

5:07🔗 Drew They pulled over a guy you were driving behind?

5:09🔗 Adam No, they pulled me over.

5:10🔗 Drew Oh.

5:11🔗 Adam Pulled me over.

5:11🔗 Drew Okay.

5:12🔗 Adam Yeah. And now I passed someone who had just been pulled over.

5:15🔗 Drew Right, right, right. Okay.

5:16🔗 Adam But obviously another cop out there on a bike, I don't think it was the same guy because he was writing a ticket. And I thought, well, why is this guy pulling me over? I wasn't even doing anything. I was just sort of stuck in traffic a little bit. And I thought, huh, all right, well, let's hear this. This ought to be good. Driving a Z car. And no front license plate. That's the thing. Pulling you over for no front license plate.

5:39🔗 Drew You've been telling everyone to take their front license plates off.

5:42🔗 Adam I'm still with that one, by the way. But I understand the sort of fix-it ticket when you're parked in the municipal parking lot and you get the extra box checked on the thing that says you got no pulling people over for no front goddamn license plate.

5:57🔗 Drew How else are you gonna get the license plate on? You won't do it otherwise.

6:00🔗 Adam Oh yeah, they'll give you a fix. They can give you a fix-it ticket when you're parked.

6:03🔗 Drew Oh, oh, oh. Oh, I see.

6:05🔗 Adam Most people who get tickets for no front license plate get it because they're at the meter and or they're in the parking lot and they come up their car and they go, what? I put change in the meter. Why is there a ticket on my car? No front license plate or illegal tent or whatever. I mean, basically, that's just, they just after the course.

6:24🔗 Drew It's just rape.

6:24🔗 Adam Yeah, they just, that's the rape continues even after you ascend to heaven. Yeah, that's it. You park the car and they're still making money off you. But pulling people over.

6:36🔗 Drew It's like a waste of time, doesn't it? It's a waste of resource.

6:40🔗 Adam Oh, interesting. But we don't have enough cops, Drew. We don't have enough cops. We don't have enough cops.

6:47🔗 Drew Did you mention this to the guy who pulled you over?

6:49🔗 Adam No, first off, the guy seemed to feel guilty because he knew it was a chicken ass whatever. And I didn't even know what he was doing until he handed me the thing.

6:59🔗 Drew He didn't explain to you why?

7:00🔗 Adam No, he just wanted to see the license. He wanted to go take a walk. And then he went back and did his thing. But I just thought, A, this guy's going to die because he's going to get clipped by a car when he's walking around to the driver side of my car. When it's parked on like Colanga and there's traffic whizzing by, he's going to buy it this way, riding a chicken ass ticket, or I'm going to get broadsided or something. And then I thought, really? This is our resources. That's it? Give the taxpayers, sort of harass the taxpayers? That's all we've come up with? That's what we've evolved into as a society? Never enough guys. ABC News is just dragging the spent uranium right through downtown LA in a cargo container. We don't have enough guys for that. We got plenty of guys for the chicken ass. That, we seem to have an unlimited amount of manpower for. The parking enforcement, yeah, and the chicken ass. You're pulling people over? I'm just going to go get the thing. I'm just going to do, and then, you know, they do this thing where they're like, yeah, it's only, it's only $15. Yeah, it's $15 and half a day. As I go see your Marshall buddy down in Van Nuys and get the thing signed up on.

8:13🔗 Drew Did he give you that no big deal thing?

8:14🔗 Adam Yeah, no, it was just $15.

8:15🔗 Drew Oh, that drives me crazy.

8:17🔗 Yeah, $15.

8:18🔗 Adam Yeah, if you make a decent living and you can't do it for half a day, it's not $15.

8:25🔗 Drew It's a lot.

8:26🔗 Adam It's a half a day. Yeah, well, that's the half a day. That's not the part we got to put the plate on and go do the thing.

8:32🔗 Drew And by the way, if you're a sole proprietor where your labor determines, pays the overhead also, you just multiply.

8:39🔗 Adam Now, listen, look, I'm going to have to sell my house. There's no two ways about it. Or, you know, I'm just going to go to Mexico.

8:46🔗 What are you asking for?

8:48🔗 Adam The house? Just enough to get a couple of sheet metal screws. I need the $15. I need the screws to get the license plate.

8:56🔗 Plus you need the cool frame with the oscillating lights.

8:59🔗 Adam Yeah, I need the chaser lights. The one that goes around.

9:01🔗 Drew You're going to put this thing on, see the marshal, and then take it off.

9:05🔗 Adam Absolutely. And I would just like, here's all I would like. I would like society to join me in my outrage. Here's what I want.

9:12🔗 Drew I'm just an idiot.

9:12🔗 Adam Yeah, just no. And everyone's like, well, that's wrong. Yeah, it is.

9:19🔗 Drew Bad use of resource.

9:20🔗 Adam Yeah. Rosa Parks. There was a law. Hey, black folks can't ride in the front of the bus, but she said, no. Is that wrong? Get in the back? What are you saying? Which is it? It's against the law. Oh, the law's not right. Oh, the law's not right. That's it. Just everybody, let's just step it up.

9:37🔗 Drew Even by the way, the law's not right.

9:38🔗 I'm taking the license plate off.

9:39🔗 Drew Don't even take a moral high ground that the law's not right. Just the law's not the one we want.

9:44🔗 Adam Yep, it's the people.

9:44🔗 Drew That's the way we like it.

9:45🔗 Adam Stop with the chicken ass. Here's the thing, cops. Here's, cops, here's what your job is to do. And I know they always hate this. I hate, they must hate when I yell this at them. But your job is to do what we want you to do. Not pursue your chicken ass pursuits. Your job is to do what we tell you to do. We're the society that you're protecting. Don't protect me from my bumper, you hayholes. Protect me from the guys carjacking me, not from the goddamn bumper of my car.

10:15🔗 Caller But what's the law about? Like why do you need a...

10:18🔗 Adam You need a front license plate.

10:19🔗 Drew So they give you tickets.

10:20🔗 Adam So you can get tickets when you drive through the intersections that they put cameras in.

10:24🔗 Drew That's why you need a front license plate.

10:25🔗 Adam That's why you need a front license plate. Because if you don't have a front license plate, you can't get tickets for that.

10:30🔗 It came into effect in 2000, because I have a whole website about it, and there's also a lot of websites about petitions trying to go against it.

10:36🔗 Adam Could everybody, here's the utopia I want to live in. I want to live in a utopia where everyone walks out to their car tomorrow morning with a Phillips head.

10:45🔗 Caller Why can't they just take a picture of the back of your car?

10:47🔗 Adam I don't know how it works from a technological standpoint. Well, when they take a picture of the back of your car, somehow the way the camera is mounted and the way it works, or maybe you're already through the intersection or however it is, they take that picture of the front of your car. I guess they want to identify you.

11:03🔗 Drew Well, it gets triggered as you violate the law. As you come into the intersection is when it triggers the... Right. It's more simplistic.

11:09🔗 Adam I imagine they'll be working on the back of the car thing too.

11:12🔗 Caller But they've got the box on the corner, you know what I mean, in front of you, that gets you as you go through. Why couldn't they just put it on the box? Yeah.

11:18🔗 Adam I'm telling you, I've driven through it with no front license plate. I didn't get a ticket in the mail, so kiss my ass, you pussies, by the way. But number two, I would love to live in a society where everyone just went out and took their front license plates off and threw them away and we just went forward. Nobody had one. And there wasn't enough cops to enforce this chicken ass rule. But I'll be the first to do it. Now I'm the guy who drives through all the left turn arrows, everybody. When that arrow turns red, I don't ignore it. I keep going. Could you please join me in this? Could everyone just drive through those? How about everyone takes off the license? I don't have a car that has a front license plate. Soon as I go down to Van Nuys and appease these $8 an hour tards, it's coming right back off again. I could have a rat's hindy how many god damn tickets I get. I don't care. It's fine. Let's just do it. Let's just everyone do it. Drew, you have a front license plate?

12:10🔗 No. Good.

12:11🔗 Adam Seth?

12:12🔗 Caller I don't have a car.

12:13🔗 Good.

12:14🔗 Adam Really?

12:14🔗 Caller Yeah.

12:15🔗 Drew That's weird.

12:15🔗 Adam What's up?

12:16🔗 Caller I haven't had a car for like eight months.

12:17🔗 Adam Seth. But you have like a go-cart or something, right? Nothing?

12:21🔗 Caller Nothing right now.

12:22🔗 Well, why not?

12:23🔗 Caller I've been working on this show.

12:24🔗 Drew He has a spaceship.

12:25🔗 Caller So I haven't needed a ride.

12:26🔗 Drew Who's a hovercraft?

12:27🔗 Caller I haven't needed. I haven't had any need for a car. Yeah. Literally, I've been in this office for like eight months. Playing ping pong. No, seven in the morning to like eight at night. And I carpool to work every day.

12:36🔗 So it's not a big deal.

12:37🔗 Adam But did you sell your car?

12:39🔗 Caller No, my cousin moved to LA and I gave it to him.

12:42🔗 Wow.

12:42🔗 Caller Yeah. And I'd planned on buying a new one, but I just got really busy.

12:45🔗 Drew The problem now, Seth, is Adam's angry.

12:46🔗 Oh, my God.

12:47🔗 Drew He's angry, A, because you don't have a car, B, because you have a family member that shares things.

12:50🔗 You gave him a car.

12:52🔗 Adam What kind of car is it I'm going to get angry at my cousin?

12:54🔗 Caller It was a Honda Civic.

12:55🔗 Adam Huh?

12:56🔗 How many?

12:56🔗 Caller Low mile?

12:57🔗 Drew Don't get too angry.

12:57🔗 Caller What's that?

12:58🔗 Adam Decent car.

12:59🔗 Caller Yeah, it was a really decent car.

13:00🔗 Adam No, now I'm angry because you're one of those actor guys that makes good money and doesn't like cars.

13:04🔗 Now I'm angry. Now I'm outraged.

13:06🔗 Caller I'll make you even angrier. I bought it in 97 new. Oh, and I just gave it away like eight months ago.

13:14🔗 Adam Now I'm going to get livid in a second when you tell me you don't know if it's a four cylinder V6.

13:19🔗 Caller It was a four cylinder.

13:21🔗 Adam I'm still kind of livid.

13:24🔗 Drew That's weak.

13:25🔗 Adam Oh my God.

13:27🔗 You just gave your cousin your car.

13:28🔗 Adam You don't have a car.

13:30🔗 You think you're in New York, son?

13:31🔗 Adam Is that what you think you are, son?

13:33🔗 Caller Yeah.

13:34🔗 Adam Do you think you're going to hop in the subway or crash out one of your faggity friends in Soho? Because that's not going to happen here.

13:40🔗 Caller I'm just going to walk, man. I'm just going to walk.

13:41🔗 Drew Not in LA. Where do you think you are? Look.

13:44🔗 Caller All right. I'll take the subway.

13:46🔗 Drew What did you do during the floods last week?

13:49🔗 Caller I was at work.

13:52🔗 Adam He's like Omega Man. He's just chained up at work. You tell your cousin he needs to take that front license plate off for the Ace man.

14:00🔗 Caller I'm pretty sure he already did.

14:01🔗 Adam Oh, really?

14:01🔗 Caller He was like, this is a bunch of crap. Really?

14:04🔗 Adam Rebel.

14:05🔗 Caller I don't know, but it sounds good, doesn't it? He's the type of guy who would too.

14:08🔗 Adam Well, he's a rebel because he couldn't afford a car. Guys that can't afford cars, they don't like Johnny Law. That's the whole thing.

14:18🔗 Caller Johnny Law.

14:20🔗 Adam Anyway, I'm just telling Johnny Law to kiss my ass. And here's all I'm saying to Johnny Law. Could you guys please ring an ounce of dignity? I mean, when you go home and you turn on the television and you watch the 80 or so cop based shows, any of them handing out chicken ass tickets? Because that's you. You see, understand, you do the kind of law enforcement that we can't make TV shows about because they're too boring and mundane and embarrassing.

14:46🔗 Caller Can you imagine if NYPD Blue was all about it? Yeah.

14:50🔗 Adam Oh, if it took place out here, it'd be all about jaywalking tickets and no front light. Yeah, it'd be very controversial. There is a cartoon in this.

14:57🔗 Do you realize that tint's a little dark on that rear window, ma'am?

15:00🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah, that's a violation. And I also see that your tabs have expired on your license plate. You think there's ever been a cop show that's ever addressed that?

15:10🔗 Drew I'm just thinking a family guy, if death or the devil shows up again, that's how he should show up as a cop.

15:17🔗 Adam You know what I mean? No.

15:18🔗 Drew An evil character.

15:19🔗 Adam No.

15:19🔗 Drew No?

15:20🔗 Adam It's a horrible idea.

15:21🔗 Drew Really?

15:21🔗 Adam I'm just saying, if there's cops listening to the show and we know they are, please make a vow. Remember when you signed up to the Academy and you thought you'd be rappelling down buildings and growing, growing Fu Manchus and going into deep undercover? Instead, you're handing out chicken ass tickets for nothing? Don't be that guy. Go Serpico. Don't go Pusico. You understand? All right. Do we take any calls, Drew?

15:49🔗 Drew Let's take one quickly.

15:50🔗 Caller No.

15:50🔗 Drew Just so we can say we did.

15:51🔗 Adam No. We're out of time. You should have never given me that ticket. Seth Green is here tonight. Well, you had to do that big iPod shuffle commercial.

15:59🔗 Drew Yeah, that took at least 12 seconds.

16:01🔗 That's what I'm saying.

16:03🔗 Adam All right. Take a quick break. Be right back after this.

16:07🔗 Caller Thank you for calling Loveline. Your call will be answered in the order it seems interesting.

16:15🔗 Want to dress up your sex life?

16:17🔗 Adam Visit durex.com. There's sex and then there's Durex. Yep, it is the best of Loveline. I'm Adam, that is Dr. Drew.

16:42🔗 Drew Love that Seth Green, huh?

16:44🔗 Adam He's a good man. He's a wee but good man. Let's keep the party going and talk to our good friends, My Chemical Romance.

16:54🔗 Hey, everybody, it's Loveline.

16:56🔗 Adam I'm the vicar of Christ. That's Dr. Drew. I'm gonna use it for 13 more days until they get a new pope in there, and then hence there's a new vicar of Christ. But I say it's up for grabs, and I'm gonna work it for all it's worth right now.

17:12🔗 Drew?

17:13🔗 Drew Yeah, your vicarness.

17:14🔗 Adam Yeah.

17:15🔗 Drew Oh, yeah, I heard a pot laugh.

17:16🔗 Adam I heard a pot laugh in this band. A couple of them. Yeah, Gerard, Mikey, and Frank, I'll hear from My Chemical Romance. Mikey has the pot laugh. Let's see, we're gonna figure it out. We're gonna figure it out.

17:28🔗 Caller There it is.

17:29🔗 Caller What, it's ugly?

17:30🔗 Caller Yeah, it's you.

17:31🔗 Caller Weird, because I don't smoke pot or drink beer or anything.

17:34🔗 Adam Really?

17:34🔗 Caller Yeah.

17:35🔗 Adam Yeah. We'll hear it, though. It doesn't lie. The pot, the pot. Yeah, there it is.

17:46🔗 Caller Wait, maybe it's Frank.

17:47🔗 Best Of Wait, I used to smoke a lot of pot. I was a championship pot smoker.

17:51🔗 Caller He had the Rasta hat.

17:54🔗 Best Of I had dreads. Really? Yeah, it was bad. And they smelled like pot.

17:57🔗 Adam Oh, yeah, sure.

17:59🔗 Best Of Remember that we got pulled over one time and they called me nappy and searched us both for weed.

18:04🔗 Caller And they asked if I was a vampire.

18:06🔗 Adam That was the man doing that. Yeah, but here's the thing. Here's the thing about your hair. Your hair is like a smell sponge you just carry around with you. You've been farting or toking, smoking or drinking or screwing or doing anything. You just sniff your head. Your head is like a diary. It's like a diary that goes back like two days. Like you could go like, see, you smoked the bong load on Tuesday. Thank you. You got laid. No, no, just oral.

18:37🔗 Caller Oral.

18:38🔗 Adam Oral later that day. They had a six pack of Mickey's and you watched this old house.

18:45🔗 Best Of You beat off.

18:46🔗 Adam You went to sleep.

18:47🔗 Caller You're like, yeah.

18:48🔗 Adam Your hair does.

18:49🔗 Best Of That's so weird because that's what I did yesterday.

18:52🔗 Caller No, I smelt it. The vicar knows.

18:58🔗 Adam Oh yeah, a lot of pot laughing. So, smoke the ton of pot, but then put it away. No more?

19:04🔗 Best Of No, no more. I couldn't remember anything anymore.

19:06🔗 Drew You know, what's interesting is how that laugh is a residual effect. That laugh is perpetual. It's amazing.

19:12🔗 Best Of That and the inability to do math.

19:14🔗 Drew That should come back. That should come back. Loving stuff with pot.

19:17🔗 Best Of I hope so.

19:18🔗 Adam But who says he could do it before he picked up the bong?

19:20🔗 Drew That's right. That's the point. He stopped learning math when he picked up the bong.

19:24🔗 Adam So, how many years of pot smoking do we have on our band?

19:29🔗 Best Of Well, high school and college. Then the band started. I guess about a year into the band, I stopped.

19:37🔗 Adam That's pretty good though. It's hard to stop.

19:40🔗 Drew There actually isn't a stopping. You switched.

19:44🔗 Adam Uh-oh. What did he switch to?

19:46🔗 Drew Alcohol, probably.

19:47🔗 Caller Oh, alright.

19:51🔗 Adam Did you switch to rock and roll?

19:54🔗 Best Of Yeah, I'm married to the rock now.

19:56🔗 Adam Did you switch to booze?

19:57🔗 Best Of I drink a little bit, but not like crazy. Not like Gerard used to.

20:00🔗 Caller Chocolate cake?

20:01🔗 Best Of Yeah, chocolate cake definitely. I've been addicted to chocolate cake, butter sandwiches and mashed potatoes.

20:06🔗 Caller There's been a lot of quitting things in this band, actually.

20:10🔗 Adam Drew, can't somebody just smoke weed for a while and then quit?

20:14🔗 Drew It's actually pretty unusual. It is possible, but it's unusual. Usually people switch to either speed or alcohol.

20:19🔗 Adam Speed?

20:20🔗 Best Of Yeah.

20:21🔗 Drew Because it corrects the depression that the pot puts you into.

20:25🔗 Best Of I used to have really bad stomach cramps too, so I used to medicate with that.

20:29🔗 Adam Well, with the pot.

20:32🔗 Best Of Yeah.

20:33🔗 Adam Let me say this, though, Drew. Show me a guy who decides it's time to quit pot at 35 after smoking for 15 years or 20 years. I'll show you guys going to switch to something else, but show me a guy who decides to quit at 23 or 24. Wow.

20:48🔗 Best Of That's old man.

20:49🔗 Adam I'll show you a guy who probably could quit.

20:53🔗 Drew Who couldn't quit for a while.

20:53🔗 Adam You're right. And is not necessarily going to switch to something else.

20:56🔗 Drew You're right.

20:57🔗 Adam When the vicar's right, the vicar's right. Is he right?

20:59🔗 Drew Your vicarness.

21:01🔗 Adam Thank you. All right. So you guys do Kimmel tonight.

21:03🔗 Drew Yes, we did.

21:04🔗 Adam How was that?

21:05🔗 Best Of It was great.

21:06🔗 Caller We got to meet Grover.

21:08🔗 Best Of Yeah, Grover was on the show.

21:11🔗 Adam They're booking characters from PBS, Drew.

21:16🔗 Caller They're booking fictitious characters.

21:18🔗 Adam Drew, how does it feel that they'll have a Sesame Street characters on over you? Is that the body of the thing?

21:25🔗 Drew Sounds about right.

21:26🔗 Adam All right. And ancillary ones too, not just Kermit and Miss Hitchcock, going deep into the roster of Sesame Street characters.

21:36🔗 Best Of B-list.

21:37🔗 Caller B-list, Sesame Street character.

21:39🔗 Caller Scooter or something. It's not for love, for good.

21:44🔗 Adam All right. Here we go. Let's take a question for the band. Adam?

21:48🔗 Hi. Love you guys. All you guys.

21:52🔗 Adam Thank you. You're female named Adam?

21:54🔗 Yes.

21:55🔗 Female.

21:57🔗 Caller Wow.

21:57🔗 Adam I'll tell you what though, you can keep the name Adam because I'm going with the vicar of Christ.

22:02🔗 Caller I don't need it.

22:03🔗 Adam I'm going to sell it on eBay. All right. Go ahead with your question.

22:08🔗 Okay. Well, Gerard, your birthday is coming up. Well, both of our birthdays are coming up. I wanted to know what you're going to do for your birthday.

22:16🔗 Caller Actually, we together as a band are going to be playing a double header, one of the first double headers in our career in London at the Historia. We're playing a matinee, which is interesting.

22:29🔗 Caller Wow.

22:30🔗 Caller That's what I'm doing.

22:31🔗 Caller Am I that far?

22:32🔗 Caller Yeah, it's five more days.

22:35🔗 Caller Yeah, it's actually not that far away at all. It's pretty excited.

22:39🔗 Adam So you play like an 8 o'clock show and an 11 o'clock show or something like that?

22:45🔗 Best Of I think our show is at like 3.30.

22:47🔗 Adam Wow. Is that hard to do or have you ever you've never done it before?

22:51🔗 Best Of Yeah, we haven't done anything early like that, except for Warped Tour. You always play early.

22:55🔗 Caller But not we haven't done it, not on this scale. Like we've never done a double header where people are expecting like an hour and 20 minutes.

23:03🔗 Best Of Like a headlining show.

23:03🔗 Caller A headlining show, yeah.

23:04🔗 Adam Yeah, I think it's got to be tough to do things like stand up or playing a band or do that stuff that's supposed to be done about 10 o'clock at night at 7.15 in the morning.

23:15🔗 Best Of Yeah.

23:15🔗 Adam Yeah. You know, the early show or something, especially when you're not used to getting up until 2 in the afternoon. Hey, Adam, the female?

23:24🔗 Yes. I had another question.

23:26🔗 All right.

23:26🔗 Adam What is it?

23:27🔗 Well, um, Jared, how can I get you your birthday surprise? How can I get you?

23:31🔗 Well, I don't want to wait till warped because it's a lot of months away.

23:37🔗 Caller Well, I think we're playing with Green Day sooner than that. Like that's the next thing we hop on.

23:41🔗 Best Of Oh, really?

23:42🔗 Caller Yeah. Like we're very excited about that.

23:46🔗 Best Of Where is she from?

23:46🔗 Caller Where are you from?

23:48🔗 I'm in Commerce.

23:49🔗 Adam It's beautiful. You've not been to the City of Commerce? Picture a lush garden inhabited by beautiful, beautiful people. Yeah, City of Commerce.

24:01🔗 Caller Awesome.

24:05🔗 Caller I don't know. Like, well, we're going to be on the Green Day thing also. I mean, you could probably mail it.

24:09🔗 Best Of Well, what is the present? So we don't know if it's good enough to like give you an address to mail it to.

24:13🔗 Caller No.

24:15🔗 Adam What is the gift?

24:16🔗 Caller It's a surprise.

24:18🔗 Adam All right. Quiet down. She's 14. For the love of Christ. She's going to bed. When are you guys going out with Green Day?

24:24🔗 Caller We're going out with them. Yeah.

24:26🔗 Best Of Right after the 15th it starts.

24:27🔗 Caller These string of UK dates. We come back and we fly to Florida.

24:30🔗 Adam I love Green Day.

24:31🔗 Best Of Me too.

24:32🔗 Caller Yeah. Me too.

24:34🔗 Adam People don't give Green Day. I think they get lumped in with other bands sometimes. People forget what a great live act Green Day is.

24:41🔗 Caller I think that used to be the case. I think now they're really-

24:43🔗 Adam I think they've stepped up and stepped out. But it's weird because they've been around for 10 years. Great. Just a great, like anyone who sees Green Day live becomes a Green Day fan. Yeah. Still, they were just, I think, in a lot of people's heads, they were just getting lumped in with a bunch of other bands. And somehow, they've stepped it up. Did they get some Grammys last year?

25:05🔗 Best Of Yeah, they did.

25:06🔗 Caller Oh, good. All right.

25:07🔗 Adam Well, Mazel Tov is half of Drew's religion, I would say.

25:12🔗 Drew No, the vicar would say.

25:14🔗 Caller The vicar?

25:15🔗 Adam The vicar doesn't say Mazel Tov? Please, Drew. No. He blesses people and that kind of stuff. I hit him with my, I used that thing, that incense thing on a chain.

25:27🔗 Best Of Oh, a sensor.

25:28🔗 Adam I swing that thing around. Yeah.

25:30🔗 Best Of Frankincense.

25:30🔗 Adam Yeah, the Frankincense. I do that. I also splash water on people. And once in a while, I hit them with a scepter. I might even dub them.

25:40🔗 Caller That'll learn them. That's how the Catholics do it.

25:42🔗 Adam Well, let's talk to, let's see, Buddy. Buddy?

25:47🔗 Caller Hey, how's it going?

25:48🔗 Adam Good, you're 25. What's up?

25:50🔗 Caller Adam, just want to tell you, you're excellent. Dr. Drew, are you all right? My Chemical Romance. My question for you, a 25 year old Mel been dating my girlfriend for four years. She's used birth control, the pill, the shot at one point, gone through probably four or five different types of birth control within the four years. And still to this day, when we have sex, I cannot ejaculate in her.

26:16🔗 Drew Come on, don't be such a pussy.

26:18🔗 Adam Drew, please.

26:19🔗 Drew Why can't you?

26:20🔗 Adam In front of the vicar of Christ.

26:24🔗 Caller It's more of a paranoia or obsessive, compulsive, you know, pregnancy, any of that.

26:31🔗 Adam I just.

26:32🔗 Drew But why don't you got no play, playa?

26:37🔗 Adam Don't talk down to her callers.

26:39🔗 Caller You know, hmm.

26:41🔗 Best Of Is that something she wants you to do?

26:43🔗 Caller Does she, yeah, do you not want to do it or does she not want you to do it?

26:48🔗 Caller It's become, it's pretty much now just normal. Well, not to do it.

26:53🔗 Drew She's not wearing a condom?

26:54🔗 Caller What's that?

26:55🔗 Drew Do you wear a condom?

26:56🔗 Caller No.

26:58🔗 Adam So why don't you put a condom on? Maybe it'll help you.

27:01🔗 Drew And now that you're having, you're having emissions while you're in her. So it's not like, you know, you're not having the full ejaculate, but this stuff comes out of you all the time you're having sex.

27:10🔗 Caller But it's not the same as the big surprise there at the end.

27:14🔗 Caller Surprise.

27:15🔗 Adam Yeah.

27:16🔗 Caller Horrible. Here's how I feel. If she's uncomfortable with it, Adam, no, that's buddy. Buddy, I'm sorry, buddy. If she's uncomfortable with it, that's ultimately, you know, it's a really hard thing for a girl to go through, especially if she gets pregnant.

27:32🔗 Adam She's comfortable with it. He freaked out about getting her pregnant, even though she has all these barriers. Right, buddy?

27:39🔗 Caller Right. She's now on a low dose. And I don't know what the difference between a low dose and a normal dose.

27:44🔗 Drew None. Buddy, don't worry. It's not your issue. She's being followed by physicians who know what they're doing. And you've got virtually 100% protection. This isn't about that. This is about your craziness, your obsessiveness.

27:56🔗 Best Of Quite possibly.

27:57🔗 Adam Maybe she's a little, you know, she's a little loggered out down there or something, getting the friction you need.

28:04🔗 Best Of Well, I mean, nothing's 100%. So, I mean, if you're not ready to take that step and maybe have a kid, then you probably shouldn't do it.

28:12🔗 Adam No, now you've just freaked them out.

28:13🔗 Best Of I'm just saying. I mean, because think about it, like, I mean, people that do that and then get pregnant. And I mean, do you have a stable job and say that were to happen? Could you afford to take care of it and take care of it like a man?

28:27🔗 Caller Oh, wow. Yeah, I mean, if the push come to shove, yeah, I could do it.

28:33🔗 Adam What do you do?

28:34🔗 Best Of But it's not something you want to do right now.

28:36🔗 Adam What do you do right? And I don't like, what kind of name is Buddy? It always sounds like someone's asking for directions from a cab, you know? Hey, buddy, hey, buddy, listen, hey, buddy, can you hold the job on a job, buddy?

28:49🔗 Caller Are you going to get her pregnant, buddy? And then who's going to raise that kid, buddy?

28:53🔗 Adam It just sounds like you're being dressed out all the time. It's like naming your kid Mac or Bub. Bob, Drew, you should have a kid named Mac.

29:02🔗 Caller Listen, Mac, you better do that homework, Mac or Bub. Hey, Bob, I ain't kidding with you. You finished those, finished that brocca flower, Bob.

29:12🔗 Caller Brocca flower.

29:13🔗 Caller Brocca flower.

29:15🔗 Adam Yeah. Buddy is disconcerting.

29:18🔗 Best Of I would just say this, if you're not ready to have a kid and you don't want, like, if you were to have a kid and wouldn't be happy about it, then you really shouldn't have that kid.

29:25🔗 Caller Yeah, don't pop it off.

29:26🔗 Adam But she is on birth control, which is 99.9, whatever.

29:31🔗 Best Of But it's still not 100%. And if that were to happen.

29:33🔗 Drew It is so close to 100% though. It is so rare to have a problem with that.

29:38🔗 Best Of You can't tell me that someone hasn't had a problem with that.

29:41🔗 Drew No, I can't tell you it never happened. But I can't say no one's won the lottery either. But it's not going to happen to you.

29:47🔗 Adam No, no, no. It's like saying, look, if you're not prepared to get into an accident, don't drive a car. And you're going, well, I'll put my seatbelt on and I won't drive drunk. And you're going, I don't care. You could still get into an accident, which is true. But eventually you got to get to work. And it's a risk.

30:05🔗 Caller Not you guys, but the vicar's got to get to work.

30:08🔗 Adam And it's a risk you take. But I agree not wearing a seatbelt, driving drunk and not turning the lights on at night is like not using any birth control at all. He's driving a Volvo with 13 airbags in it. But it doesn't mean that a tanker truck can't run over him and crush him. It's just probably not going to happen.

30:33🔗 Caller He could always try like a hypnotist, you know? Yeah.

30:35🔗 Caller Hey buddy. You know what? I'm going to have to look into that now.

30:39🔗 Drew No, no, no. Here's what you need to do. If phobias and anxieties could easily be due to hypnosis, we would not have those in this world. It's much more complicated than that.

30:50🔗 Adam And I don't know what's going on with you, but you need to look into it. And how are you having an orgasm now? Oral sex?

30:57🔗 Caller No, no, you just pull it out.

30:59🔗 Caller It's a lettering.

31:02🔗 Adam That's fine.

31:02🔗 Caller It's the frontal shot, but that gets old after a while.

31:06🔗 Adam Yeah, I imagine, especially on that corduroy sofa your folks gave you, it's a disaster. You can only flip that cushion so many times. Drew, you ever seen a corduroy sofa?

31:22🔗 Caller I keep getting interest in the bus.

31:23🔗 Adam Yeah, it's a disaster.

31:24🔗 Drew I'm still thinking about what you did to the bean bag.

31:27🔗 Adam That wasn't me.

31:28🔗 Drew It turned into a solid block.

31:30🔗 Adam No, that was not me. It was a friend of mine who used to hump the bean bag. He'd open up the zipper a little and get some of that peanut pack. Then you'd have to break it. The thing would dry up like a snowball. You'd have to whack it and then break it up again. Yeah, you'd have to drop an elbow on it before you could sit on it. Get it moving again. All right, let's take ourselves a little break. My Chemical Romance in studio tonight. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this.

32:02🔗 Caller Hello, this is your radio. Loveline will be right back.

32:08🔗 Caller Loveline is brought to you by Vibrations, the award-winning vibrating condom ring at gotvib.com. Makes safe sex great and great sex even greater. You have to try it to believe it. Only at gotvib.com.

32:37🔗 Adam It is the Best of Loveline. I'm Adam.

32:40🔗 Caller That's Dr. Drew.

32:41🔗 Adam Just wanted you to say something.

32:43🔗 Drew Yeah, thank you. I appreciate that. Next up, Meet the Barkers, what I've seen since they were on the air, just a normal American family, Travis and Shana. Just like it.

32:51🔗 Adam Yeah, like Apple, Pine, Chevrolet. Yeah, everybody. Some Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, Travis Barker here tonight, Shana Barker here on, I guess we should call you Mocha, right? Do you go by Barker?

33:11🔗 I go by either or. I still haven't officially changed because I have to go to DMV and the Social Security. And it's been a little crazy busy. So.

33:17🔗 Adam What are you? Are you cool? I mean, you cool with Barker?

33:21🔗 Oh, absolutely. I'm very proud of being Mrs. Barker.

33:24🔗 Drew She thought you were an offer or something. Are you cool?

33:27🔗 Caller Yes. Cool.

33:28🔗 Adam You need another wine cooler, my lady? That's my line at the parlor. So here's the thing. Oh, someone's smoking weed.

33:39🔗 Caller Wow.

33:40🔗 Adam Skunk just blew in here.

33:42🔗 I feel like Shanna has my headphones. I'm not that high. She has my headphones.

33:47🔗 I had them on too and I was like, God, these sounds so weird. Why am I echoing?

33:51🔗 Adam This is crazy. Yeah, they smell like Don Ho.

33:54🔗 Let me hear yours so I can hear your eyes.

33:56🔗 Adam Wow.

33:57🔗 I don't like yours. I like mine. This is weird.

33:59🔗 Adam Hello, hello, hello. That's good weed.

34:01🔗 Thank you.

34:02🔗 Adam I can smell you. It's nice. What's an eighth run these days? I gotta get back into the weed.

34:09🔗 You can buy like a good half ounce of Cush for like 500 bucks or something.

34:15🔗 Adam What's Cush? I don't know.

34:16🔗 What's the best weed?

34:17🔗 Adam It's the best weed. It's the Cush weed.

34:20🔗 Drew Is it grown out here or is it grown?

34:21🔗 I think it's grown out here, yeah. But it's all natural. There's no chemicals in it, you know.

34:26🔗 Adam You ever eat pot?

34:28🔗 No. I like the whole like... I stopped smoking for years, like smoking cigarettes. And I started smoking marijuana just because it mellows you out. You know what I mean? I always like... I run myself ragged. I work too much, you know, so I always do it at the end of the night. But I like the whole act of smoking, so I don't like use the vaporizer and I don't put in my cookies or my brownies, you know?

34:48🔗 Adam Yeah. You ever use one of those vaporizers, Drew?

34:50🔗 No, I've never done that.

34:50🔗 Adam It's weird. My headphones back. Yeah. Heats the pot up, like super heats the pot.

34:54🔗 Headphone Nazi, hold on.

34:55🔗 Adam But it doesn't turn into smoke, it turns into vapor. A lot of doctors recommend it to their chronic pot smoking people, like singing stuff.

35:05🔗 Drew Right, you don't get chronic bronchitis from it.

35:07🔗 Adam Yeah.

35:07🔗 Drew Everyone smokes pot regularly gets chronic bronchitis. That's the- Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, very common.

35:11🔗 What do you think is worse for you, Dr. Drew? Do you think smoking cigarettes is worse for you, or smoking like natural wheat?

35:17🔗 Drew Natural wheat.

35:18🔗 Or like good wheat.

35:19🔗 Drew tobacco is a natural product too, it just makes it plant.

35:23🔗 I saw a hypnotist and he told me there's 350 poisons in cigarettes.

35:27🔗 Adam There are 350, yeah. Because there's like 325, it'd be cool with it, the 350.

35:34🔗 Drew Over the top. There's no doubt that for your overall health, in terms of what's going to kill you, nicotine is worse, and what kills people in this country, nicotine is worse. But when it really gets a grip on people, it's very difficult to stop. It will cause brain changes.

35:49🔗 Adam Why, what is so different about the cigarette smoke and the marijuana smoke? I mean, at least you get to filter in marijuana, right?

35:58🔗 Drew In cigarettes.

35:59🔗 Adam I mean, I'm sorry, in cigarettes. One is tobacco, the broke just leafy plants that people dry out in smoke.

36:06🔗 Drew Right.

36:06🔗 Adam Is there that much processing going on in cigarettes?

36:10🔗 Drew No, the carcinogens are from released in the tobacco with the smoke.

36:16🔗 Adam But doesn't marijuana have the same smoke?

36:18🔗 Drew No, it doesn't.

36:18🔗 Adam It's not the same kind of smoke.

36:20🔗 Drew It's different.

36:20🔗 Adam So it's like burning a tobacco leaf right off the plantation and burning a marijuana plant would be different smoke, I mean, in terms of your body.

36:28🔗 Drew Different smoke. And the marijuana has irritates the lungs, but doesn't cause the vascular damage, we don't think at least, the way the tobacco does.

36:36🔗 Adam Yes, I see these ads every once in a while in these sort of drug-free America campaigns and stuff where they're like, what they don't tell you is one, you know, a lot of parents would freak out if their kids smoke cigarettes, but they don't say anything over marijuana. They don't realize one marijuana joint is equivalent to four cigarettes. But here's the thing, people smoke 30 cigarettes a day.

37:00🔗 Caller You really only need to smoke one joint.

37:02🔗 Drew Not even one.

37:03🔗 Adam I need to smoke a little more.

37:04🔗 Caller I need to smoke a little bit more too.

37:05🔗 Adam One in a roach. The point is, yeah, idiots, you've made your point, but if the person's only smoking, they're not in a rock band. But most people take a couple draws off a roach or a joint. Most people who smoke pot or a lot of people who smoke pot may smoke less than half a joint a day.

37:23🔗 Drew And again, that data is more on specifically airway damage to lungs and just airway damage to lungs. Nothing to do with heart disease or other things.

37:31🔗 Adam It's equivalent if you smoke, have a few hits off a roach when you come home, and it's like smoking two cigarettes a day. So they don't really couch it that way. It's as if you've smoked 20 joints a day instead of 20 cigarettes a day.

37:43🔗 Drew All right. The point is, if people are going to try to educate people.

37:46🔗 Adam Travis is going to try, by the way, for the 20 joints a day.

37:48🔗 Drew They should not try tricking them. Just be very direct with what the information is. Because they'll figure it out for themselves.

37:53🔗 Adam Right. All right. And by the way, telling a 19-year-old that it's worse for you than cigarettes doesn't mean anything to a night. Just like telling a 19-year-old, Pepsi is bad for you. Start drinking orange juice. So they're like, who cares? I'm skinny. I'm young. What do I care?

38:07🔗 Caller All right.

38:08🔗 Adam I was talking about me.

38:09🔗 Drew You, of course.

38:10🔗 Adam Yeah. I'm skinny. I'm young.

38:11🔗 Drew Yeah, you are. You are, sir.

38:13🔗 Adam Chandra?

38:14🔗 Drew Young.

38:15🔗 Adam Chandra?

38:16🔗 Yes.

38:17🔗 Adam You're 22.

38:19🔗 Caller Yeah.

38:21🔗 Adam Oh, your boyfriend. His penis is bottoming out.

38:25🔗 Caller Yeah, I'm a little concerned because it's kind of a recent development and it's really not that long. I know he'd hate to say that, but.

38:34🔗 Drew Well, as long as you don't say it on national radio or anything.

38:36🔗 Caller Yeah, he's cool.

38:38🔗 Adam Keep it under your hand.

38:40🔗 Drew Have you guys changed positions?

38:43🔗 Caller It usually happens if we're doing like doggy style or he's like on top of me.

38:49🔗 Right.

38:50🔗 Drew Where does that leave?

38:51🔗 Get a liberator.

38:53🔗 Caller Oh, seriously.

38:55🔗 Drew A grommet?

38:56🔗 Caller Yeah, they position like they position the girl in a comfortable position.

38:59🔗 Pillows or whatever. There's really great pillows and they kind of put the woman in a very comfortable position.

39:05🔗 Caller We conceived our son on one.

39:06🔗 Yeah, they're amazing and they're very comfortable and they help with that.

39:09🔗 Drew Wait, what are these things?

39:11🔗 They're like a triangle.

39:12🔗 Drew They're designed for sex?

39:13🔗 Yeah, designed for sex and for conceiving on them. But they're fun. You can have a lot of fun with them.

39:18🔗 Drew Where do you get them?

39:19🔗 You can get them at like sex shops, pleasure shops, or adult shops.

39:22🔗 Adam Or a liver hair.

39:24🔗 And magazines like Vogue and Cosmopolitan have them in the back. You know, they're not, as a playboy, has them. High times.

39:29🔗 Adam You go to the high times.

39:32🔗 Drew Some people like the doggie style. They're not going to stop doing that.

39:35🔗 No, no, you get, you use it doggie style, but it's like a triangle pillow.

39:40🔗 Caller The girl gets to rest her tummy in her boobies on there. You know what I mean?

39:43🔗 Caller So she's not on all fours.

39:44🔗 Adam I got one. I've had one. Let me just give you a little tip. Pay the extra and get the Scotch Gardening.

39:50🔗 Caller Oh yeah.

39:51🔗 Adam It doesn't. I tried to save a few bucks.

39:53🔗 Caller And you know, if you have children, our daughter pulls our son around on it.

39:57🔗 Like around the house, they think it's like a gymnastics toy or something.

40:01🔗 Caller Or like a piece of furniture. It's not dirty.

40:05🔗 Caller Yeah, absolutely.

40:06🔗 But it's really like it's super comfortable. No, it's like Travis is large.

40:12🔗 Adam Oh, really?

40:13🔗 Yes. Very well endowed, my husband is.

40:19🔗 Caller Adam's going to be waiting for me in the park.

40:20🔗 You know what?

40:21🔗 Adam I'll tell you what. Let me tell you just about.

40:22🔗 But to a fault, because it can be uncomfortable.

40:25🔗 Adam Yeah, unwieldy.

40:26🔗 Drew Too big, Adam, he's too big. It's awful, it's painful.

40:31🔗 Adam I got no prompts. No, here's the thing.

40:33🔗 Drew You've been of all kinds of women.

40:35🔗 Adam Here's the... Women that can't orgasm with air course, and others that can't orgasm with air course. That's our new drug, Drew. All right, now here's what I want to say about Travis. I bet you Travis has a large penis, but I bet part of it is the frame that it's on.

40:57🔗 Caller He's as thick as he is long.

40:59🔗 Adam He has a narrow waist and not a ton of ass. And therefore, he's like, it's like a big mailbox on a small lawn.

41:08🔗 Drew That's right.

41:09🔗 Adam That's what I'm saying. Now, if you had a big old lawn. Now, I'm saying not a nice penis, I'm sure. I'm sure. But made even bigger, even bigger by the fact. See, when you when you have a guy who's, you know, has a 2% body fat and goes a buck 50 and he has a big dong on him, it is that much more impressive.

41:31🔗 Caller No, it does. If you're skinny or if you're in shape, it makes you.

41:35🔗 Adam Yeah, it's much better.

41:36🔗 Caller You look different.

41:37🔗 Adam Yeah.

41:38🔗 Caller If you don't have a big old gut.

41:40🔗 Adam Listen, who are you talking to? Do you have Drew over here?

41:42🔗 Caller I know you guys are both in shape and you outran me one time. I was thinking about the end of the day, but I want to re-challenge you because I'm in shape now. It was like a couple of years ago when I was smoking a lot.

41:51🔗 Adam Oh, yeah.

41:51🔗 Caller But you killed me. He murdered me in a race.

41:54🔗 Adam We were we were we did something down at the NFL experience. I think for the Super Bowl. Yeah, I forgot about that. Yeah, I ran around with Blink 182.

42:04🔗 Caller It was so funny. He kicked our butt at every sport.

42:07🔗 Adam No, I think I think Mark may have won in the one in the sprint. All right. Where are we, Drew? What's going on? Oh, she's bottoming out. Yeah, I forgot about that.

42:16🔗 Caller Liberator by the liberator. Seriously.

42:18🔗 Drew So Chandra.

42:19🔗 Adam Yeah. But aren't you going to bottom out even deeper on the liberator?

42:22🔗 Caller No, we've had that problem before.

42:24🔗 Adam We had the bottom out.

42:25🔗 Caller Yeah, like in certain positions. And then when we have the liberator, there's no problem. It's crazy.

42:30🔗 Drew Chandra. So the deal is its position is whether it's liberator or whether you are more careful with your doggy style or avoid doggy style.

42:38🔗 Adam Oh, you know, you got to get the new one with the cup holder still.

42:41🔗 Drew The beer?

42:41🔗 Caller It's not like a beverage.

42:43🔗 Adam You know, I run dry.

42:44🔗 Caller He can always chill out a little bit too, right? He doesn't have to go.

42:47🔗 Drew That's right. I like to replenish the electrolytes. I'm sure he's impressing himself by doing this, but he has to know that it hurts you. And what he's doing is he's hitting up against your cervix. That's what happens.

42:57🔗 Caller Yeah, it feels like I'm losing my breath.

43:00🔗 Drew Yeah. Well, it's a visceral experience. I mean, it's pushing on your gut.

43:03🔗 Adam Tell him to slow down a little bit.

43:06🔗 Caller All right. All right.

43:07🔗 Adam I mean, he can do that. He can not bottom out. Just tell him not to get a running start.

43:11🔗 Caller Or maybe she can be on top. That way she can control.

43:13🔗 Adam You control the depth.

43:15🔗 Drew But it's not like he's not into that. It's not like he's into his thing.

43:18🔗 Well, no, I'm into this.

43:19🔗 Caller I'm into the doggie style, too. It's just occasionally it bottoms out and it hurts.

43:25🔗 Caller Dr. Drew, I have a question. Does it affect women when they have their periods or stuff like that? Would that make a difference? Yeah.

43:33🔗 Drew Yeah, because there's obviously some swelling and some vascular congestion down there then, so it's more easy to hit it and it's more irritable. It hurts more.

43:40🔗 Adam Let me tell you what I would do. I mean, it's no liberator, but it's a cheap fix. I like to work with wood. You see, I have skills outside the studio as well. If you're using a drill bit and you're drilling like a multi-hole in a partition or something, you don't want to pop through the other side sometimes. Put a little thing of tape around it so you know when to stop.

44:02🔗 Drew Tape around the drill bit?

44:04🔗 Adam Yeah, why not do that with the penis? A little piece of duct tape at the halfway point, that's as far as you go.

44:09🔗 Drew A little visual reminder. You know some of those drills that release when they get to the other side?

44:16🔗 Caller No, I don't know what you're talking about.

44:17🔗 Drew Neurosurgeons have these things that if they're drilling through the skull, it just stops it when it gets to the...

44:22🔗 Adam Oh, when it breaks there? Yeah. I'm a woodworker and a neurosurgeon.

44:25🔗 Drew I'm just saying. We're talking about the body here.

44:27🔗 Adam Okay, penis that releases?

44:29🔗 Drew Yeah.

44:30🔗 Adam I've seen those, once I do look in the magazines and I see those liberator things, and it always takes me a minute. There's always a hot chick.

44:38🔗 Caller Yeah, you're always confused.

44:39🔗 Adam Every magazine's different.

44:40🔗 Caller Playboy, it's sexy and they're all naughty on it. And Cosmo, they're all sweet next to it, you know?

44:49🔗 Adam I should invest in this company. You should.

44:52🔗 Drew Let's buy it.

44:53🔗 Caller Let's buy the patent. Let's buy the liberator.

44:54🔗 Adam Yeah.

44:55🔗 Caller And you can build a factory.

44:56🔗 Drew We'll call it the destroyer. We'll ramp it up a little bit.

45:00🔗 Adam And I'll immediately make a modification, like your company's logo here, drink holders, like I said, the scotch guarding.

45:08🔗 Drew You can put it on the things.

45:11🔗 Adam Oh, a little video, a little heads up video display for the fellas.

45:14🔗 Caller Make one that's like a mirror, like people could see.

45:17🔗 Drew Oh, I love the Travis design.

45:20🔗 Caller I'll do like a signature series. It means Shane will be in the ad. Yeah.

45:23🔗 Adam You put the symbol up there. So when the orgasm pain, you hit the splash symbols when you orgasm. Yeah. Well, I had if you can't get a boner. And any do the Spongebob one for the kids who like to play with it, drag them around. Of course. Wow. This is awesome. This is money maker. We probably said too much. Yeah.

45:42🔗 Drew Is this thing on? Is this thing on?

45:43🔗 Adam Take these ideas and run with them. All right. Let's take a little break here. We have Travis and Shanna tonight from Meet the Barkers. We will manage with that liberator. That thing must get a funk going after a few months. A couple of summers on that liberator. I think that will smell like just one pile of sack. You got to send that thing out every once in a while.

46:05🔗 Drew Sack and semen.

46:06🔗 Adam Just one big mess. You can send that every once in a while. Just bring that through the coin out car wash.

46:12🔗 Best Of Just take it and give it a good hose.

46:15🔗 Caller I take it outside and hose it down when I do the car or something.

46:18🔗 Adam Just hit it good every once in a while. Then a quick coat of Arm-Roll and right back into the bedroom. All right. We'll be right back after this.

46:26🔗 Caller All right, guys.

46:27🔗 Caller Here's the deal.

46:28🔗 Caller You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?

46:31🔗 Caller One call is all you need to make.

46:33🔗 Caller Call the Dateline.

46:34🔗 Best Of 877-889-DATE. Call the Dateline.

46:41🔗 Caller Loveline will be right back.

47:12🔗 Adam Yeah, it is the best of Loveline, Adam. That's my on again, off again lover, Dr. Drew.

47:18🔗 Drew These shows are really so much better than real Loveline.

47:21🔗 Adam Well, here's the thing. These are compilations made from shows of days of yore. You probably haven't heard these shows, and if you had, it's been a year or so.

47:32🔗 Drew And you missed them, and they were the best.

47:34🔗 Caller And you were stoned.

47:35🔗 Drew Oh, dude.

47:36🔗 Adam So, speaking of stoners, because this guy, I know, smokes copious amounts of weed. George Garcia from Lost, the heavy set fella from Lost. Hey, everybody, it's the Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Jorge has his white friends know him, George. Garcia is in here tonight. Jorge is George. A lot of folks don't know that. Yeah. Yeah. He is in here tonight from Lost. You know him as Hurley from Lost, ABC. All right. Where is we, Drew? Jessica. Jessica. Double D's. Jessica.

48:12🔗 Hi.

48:12🔗 Adam Hey. You're 15?

48:15🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:16🔗 Adam You have double D's at 15.

48:19🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:20🔗 Adam 32 double D. Yeah. I got mixed emotions.

48:26🔗 Drew 15.

48:27🔗 Adam Okay. That's one side of it.

48:29🔗 Caller That's one side of whatever they are.

48:30🔗 Adam There's two numbers I have to balance out in this call. And a couple letters. Just have to balance the 15 against the 32 and the D's.

48:40🔗 Drew What is your question?

48:41🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:41🔗 Adam What is your question?

48:42🔗 Well, I just wanted to know, like, every guy that I've liked, they just want to, like, hook up with me. And nobody wants to, like, be my boyfriend or whatever. And, like, I want to know how to, like, change or whatever so people don't just, like, see me as a slut.

48:57🔗 Caller Yeah.

48:58🔗 Drew Have they been hooking up? Have you, do you hook up with these guys?

49:01🔗 Well, not all of them.

49:03🔗 Drew Uh-oh.

49:03🔗 Adam But, do you, have you had sex with them?

49:06🔗 Caller No.

49:07🔗 Adam No. Oral sex?

49:10🔗 Caller Uh, yeah.

49:13🔗 Adam Um, and, uh...

49:15🔗 Drew Do you just like all this attention? I mean, why are you doing that?

49:18🔗 Caller Well, no, I hate, like, that they only see me as just that. I just, like, it's like, nobody cares, like, who I am. Just, like, they just see my boobs and they're like, whoa.

49:29🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, no one cares who any 15-year-old or...

49:32🔗 Drew Put that on a loop, please.

49:35🔗 Adam Guys don't care who 30-year-old chicks are. They just look at whatever and go, whoa.

49:41🔗 Caller Dude, like, whoa.

49:42🔗 Adam Whoa. Whoa. How big's the rest of you?

49:46🔗 Caller Um, I'm 5'5 and, like, 113.

49:51🔗 Adam 113?

49:52🔗 Caller Yeah.

49:53🔗 Adam Oh, that's thin, baby. I put a couple pounds on you.

49:56🔗 Caller Wow.

49:57🔗 Adam That's novelty.

49:59🔗 Caller All right.

49:59🔗 Adam So, wow, that's good stock there.

50:02🔗 Drew Whoa.

50:02🔗 Adam To harvest an egg.

50:07🔗 Drew Jessica, here's the deal. Maybe you ought to be more discriminating with who you date and maybe date guys for a while before you do any kind of hooking up stuff.

50:15🔗 Adam Make sure they're sincere.

50:16🔗 Drew You go ahead and ask the guys out and I guarantee you, you'll be able to sort of call the shots a little bit. It's fine. You're in a good situation, but hold back. Don't cave in to all this attention. It's not good. Yeah, yeah. You just find somebody. You want to have a relationship? Fine. Find that guy. Start dating him. Go out with for a while before you do anything with him.

50:36🔗 Adam Yeah. Just take it slow. And believe me, they're guys that, I mean, look, if I found you in high school, I would have hang on to you with both hands. Never let you go. Yeah. We've been married today. Be awesome. You'd be waiting for me to come home after the radio show. Yeah.

50:55🔗 Caller Cool. Thank you.

50:58🔗 Drew Thank you.

51:00🔗 Adam Of course you'd be a mess.

51:02🔗 Drew Married to you.

51:02🔗 Adam I averaged. Father time wouldn't be kind. I probably wouldn't be turned on by it because, you know, we've been together since junior high and you know.

51:12🔗 Drew It's old hat now.

51:13🔗 Adam I'm starting to see other people. Oof. Although I'm keeping it from you. I've retreated in my own world of booze and pornography. Now I'm starting to even look at men.

51:24🔗 Caller Oh, God. Wow.

51:25🔗 Adam Yeah. Got a taste for men. Well, not men. Boys.

51:29🔗 Drew So anyway.

51:30🔗 Adam Yeah.

51:31🔗 Drew I'm going to be taking calls tomorrow night at 8, Pacific time on female ejaculation. The usual Loveline member.

51:36🔗 Adam I hook up with one of the neighbor boys.

51:37🔗 Drew Also, how do you know you're doing good and bad? How do you know you get in some way?

51:39🔗 Adam Next thing you know, I get stung by some Internet thing where the cops are on there, you know, trying to round up pedophiles.

51:45🔗 Drew I'm taking calls at 8 o'clock.

51:46🔗 Adam End up doing time, but we set up a Zephyr myself and I'm able to keep doing the show.

51:50🔗 Drew 1-800-LOVE-191.

51:52🔗 Adam I get out in a few years. You've turned lesbian yourself. What's that?

51:57🔗 Drew It's good times.

51:58🔗 Adam Yeah. I'm just trying to figure out our future.

52:01🔗 Caller That's all.

52:01🔗 Drew Sounds wonderful.

52:02🔗 Caller Yeah. Well, let's start it off, okay.

52:06🔗 Adam Amanda?

52:07🔗 Caller Yeah?

52:08🔗 Adam You're 15?

52:09🔗 Caller Yeah.

52:10🔗 Adam All right. What's up?

52:13🔗 Caller I have a question about butt sex.

52:15🔗 Caller You do? All right.

52:18🔗 Caller Yeah. Okay.

52:21🔗 Caller Me and my mom, we got an argument today. She said that guys don't like butt sex and I said that they do. And she said that only slutty guys that don't respect and like the girls, they are the only ones that like butt sex.

52:34🔗 Drew How did that conversation, was this birthday dinner? What was happening? Grandma over?

52:40🔗 Caller Yeah. She's my stepmom and me and my sister, Lashawn, we were talking about butt sex and I asked her if she ever had butt sex. She's like, yes, once, but it wasn't good. We got an argument about it.

52:51🔗 Drew Hold on. Slow down. Slow down. This is a conversation you had with your stepmom?

52:56🔗 Caller Yeah. We were in the car on the way home.

53:00🔗 Drew Oh, well, then it's all dead. What did you say? So it's free for all the soap available to wash her mouth out.

53:06🔗 Adam Yeah.

53:07🔗 Drew What happened to that? I remember watching a friend of mine get the soap in the mouth.

53:13🔗 Adam Really?

53:13🔗 Drew Yes.

53:14🔗 Adam Wow.

53:15🔗 Drew Actually, the mom put the soap in the mouth.

53:17🔗 Adam This reminds me of a provocative conversation I had with my stepmother when I was young. Here's how it went. I got dad a sweater for Father's Day. Oh, what color? Orange. Oh, and we just kept driving. Yeah. But at the time, it was considered scandalous.

53:35🔗 Drew Oh my God. Huge.

53:37🔗 Adam That was awesome. Hey, Amanda. Yeah. Don't tell your dad about the previous.

53:46🔗 Drew Oh, for the mom, you mean?

53:48🔗 Adam Yeah.

53:48🔗 Drew Oh.

53:50🔗 Adam All right. And.

53:51🔗 Caller Oh my God.

53:53🔗 Adam Yeah. All right, baby. Don't grow up. They grow up so fast these days, don't they?

53:57🔗 Drew Yeah. You're kind of right, but your mom's kind of right.

53:59🔗 Adam You're both right.

54:00🔗 Drew Guys are interested in this, but the guys that actually push it, that really, really demand it.

54:05🔗 Adam I mean, they really pack it in.

54:07🔗 Drew I agree with your mom. I agree with your mom. The guys are preoccupied about this. I agree with you.

54:12🔗 Adam Some guys just have a sexual agenda, but they're kind of hang loose about it. But the guys that really pack it.

54:19🔗 Drew The union packers. Yeah.

54:20🔗 Adam I mean, the guys that just don't stop packing that agenda in there. I mean, they will not rest until every ounce of that agenda has been thoroughly packed away. And they will thrust and they will retreat.

54:36🔗 Drew All right, all right. She got the idea.

54:38🔗 Caller Okay. All right.

54:39🔗 Caller Just say pack one more time.

54:40🔗 Caller Come on.

54:41🔗 Drew Come on.

54:43🔗 Adam Relax. Tell me to relax.

54:45🔗 Caller Relax.

54:46🔗 Drew At ease.

54:47🔗 Adam How dare you?

54:48🔗 Caller You're out of line.

54:50🔗 Adam You know, I like super macho movies where guys yell stand down at each other. Stand down. Yeah. Ed Harris just keeps yelling, stand down. That was how that movie The Rock went. Just Ed, just two hours. Ed Harris yelling at guys, stand down.

55:04🔗 Drew I'm disturbed. Two 15 year olds.

55:06🔗 Caller No, no, no.

55:07🔗 Adam No, no, no. They add up to 30 year olds.

55:10🔗 Drew No.

55:11🔗 Adam Yeah. Very sad. They grow up so fast. Yeah. It's really, it's really, you know, let me tell you the difference between white people and Asian people. When Asian people grow up fast, they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast, they start by fudge packing and triple D's at 13. You know what I mean? That's our version of growing up. That's our version of maturity. Yeah.

55:36🔗 Drew I think the whole piercing and tattooing thing is going towards the church. That's where all that energy is going now.

55:41🔗 Adam What do you mean?

55:43🔗 Drew That's where all that energy is going. Rather than putting a spirit through your tongue, you're going to find Jesus Christ.

55:48🔗 Adam Well, a lot of people getting born again and that kind of thing. Interesting. Jorge, you Catholic? No, I see.

55:56🔗 Caller I grew up Protestant.

55:57🔗 Adam Oh, what is that, Drew?

56:00🔗 Caller He's a pagan.

56:01🔗 Adam How do they define themselves, the Protestants?

56:04🔗 Drew Define themselves?

56:05🔗 Adam Well, I don't know the difference between, to me, you're an atheist or Jew or you're Catholic or you're a Christian.

56:10🔗 Drew Reformation.

56:10🔗 Adam I know the Protestants, but I don't know what they're known.

56:14🔗 Drew It's more, all the sort of rituals taken away, all the icons taken away, and it's back to the biblical, it's all about the text of the Bible.

56:23🔗 Caller Boring.

56:25🔗 Drew And austerity and hard work.

56:27🔗 Adam Oh, like Protestant work ethic?

56:29🔗 Caller Yeah.

56:31🔗 Drew And then you really get into it with the Puritans.

56:34🔗 Adam I take the Jews. They get to wear jewelry, you know. They don't work on Saturdays. They eat a lot. They're having through the sheep part. I'd like to modify that. But if you've seen some of their wives, maybe there's something there.

56:49🔗 Caller You know what I mean? Wow. Well, I'm trying to figure it out.

56:52🔗 Adam I'm just saying, you know, I'm trying to learn. Liz?

56:56🔗 Yes.

56:57🔗 Adam You're 25? Yes. You want to change the way your vagina tastes?

57:03🔗 Caller Yes.

57:03🔗 Caller That's right.

57:05🔗 Adam All right.

57:05🔗 Drew Why?

57:06🔗 Adam You want to go from wild berry to spearmint?

57:09🔗 Caller No. See, I've never had a problem with it before, but my husband says he doesn't like the way I taste, and we just got married, so it's kind of a problem.

57:19🔗 Drew Is it maybe an excuse for him? Maybe he just doesn't like doing that act?

57:23🔗 Caller I don't know. All I know is that he won't do it, and it really bothers me because it's something I enjoy. And I was just wondering if I could eat something different to...

57:34🔗 Drew No, no, no, no. I mean, you can try some douching or maybe some lubricating.

57:39🔗 Caller Well, I do that, and it just...

57:41🔗 Drew All right, that means he's just making an excuse. He's freaked out about that act.

57:45🔗 Adam He doesn't want to do it.

57:46🔗 Drew Yeah.

57:47🔗 Caller Well, he does enjoy oral sex for him a lot, but...

57:50🔗 Drew Well, then you can withhold that, and you get the perfect change.

57:53🔗 Adam Now it's just really confusing. I can't believe it. Now I don't know what to do.

57:57🔗 Drew I don't think there's ever been a man that's done this ever.

58:00🔗 Caller Well, he's like obsessed with it, and since I'm not doing it much anymore, I don't know. I'm afraid he's going to maybe cheat on me.

58:09🔗 Drew Oh, so you backed it. His relationship is in trouble already.

58:11🔗 Adam Wow, that's great. You guys have been married for 10 minutes and already this?

58:16🔗 Caller Yeah.

58:17🔗 Drew How long did you know each other before you got married?

58:20🔗 Caller We were in a relationship for two years.

58:22🔗 Drew And this oral sex thing being important to you didn't come up in that two-year period?

58:27🔗 Caller Well, he didn't do it a lot. Maybe like once every three months. And then I asked for it recently and yeah, he just wouldn't do it.

58:37🔗 Adam Yeah. It's bad. I think it's a bad sign in a marriage when one partner says to another partner, whoever the partner is, look, could you give me a little something? And they're like, no, I'm not going to do it. It's bad, especially in the first year of the marriage. I understand, you know, later on, you know, it's like, I'll do it tomorrow or, you know, let the gardener get to it or something like that. But this is bad. And is he angry or what's going on?

59:09🔗 Caller No, he's not angry. It's I got really upset and I cried a lot about it because he said, you know, he compared it to biscuits and gravy. If you can believe that he said that, you know, because I don't like biscuits and gravy. And he said, you know, just because I don't like it, it doesn't mean that everybody doesn't like it. And it doesn't not.

59:27🔗 Drew What the hell does that mean?

59:29🔗 Adam I don't know. Well, but by the year, by the way, I was going to say, what year are we in? Like first off, no one eats biscuits and gravy.

59:35🔗 Drew This is on a farm in Pennsylvania. The turn of the century again.

59:38🔗 Caller Yeah. So, so who is this guy?

59:41🔗 Drew How old is he?

59:43🔗 Caller He is 24.

59:44🔗 Adam He's a year younger than you.

59:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

59:47🔗 Adam And what's he do?

59:50🔗 Caller He's a chef.

59:51🔗 Drew Biscuits and gravy?

59:53🔗 Adam And does he really not like biscuits and gravy? Cause I've never met anyone that doesn't like biscuits and gravy.

59:58🔗 Caller No, that's me. I don't like, I don't like the gravy. The biscuits are fine. The gravy is disgusting.

1:00:02🔗 Adam Okay.

1:00:03🔗 Drew You just never had good biscuits and gravy.

1:00:05🔗 Adam Yeah, I could do good. You haven't had my biscuits and gravy. That's all. That's all. I'd turn you, I'd turn you out. All right. So.

1:00:16🔗 Drew I feel like I'm taking a visit to another planet.

1:00:17🔗 Adam I know. It's okay. Speaking of gravy, do not extract any more from him.

1:00:23🔗 Drew Well, she's not been, and now they're starting to really fight. He's still not backing down or getting down.

1:00:28🔗 Adam You know, here's the part I object to in his way of approaching this. I don't mind him saying, look.

1:00:36🔗 Drew Not into this.

1:00:37🔗 Adam Not at the top of my list, but then when you turn it on and go, I don't like the way you taste. And by the way, saying, maybe you have a little infection down there or something going on.

1:00:44🔗 Drew Making it her problem.

1:00:46🔗 Adam But not like the way you taste. It's just not liking you in a weird, in a weird sort of distilled kind of way. It's that's you.

1:00:55🔗 Drew Yeah, I'm not going to do that because you're a problem.

1:00:58🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:00:59🔗 Adam Is there anything else we need to know about this guy?

1:01:06🔗 Caller Well, he hangs out with my friend a lot and she's 19, but I mean, they're like brother and sister. They've known each other for years. And that's his best friend's little sister. That and our sex life has gone downhill. So.

1:01:21🔗 Adam Yeah, yeah. But if he's, if he's cheating, I don't think he's coming home and making proclamations about not wanting to. And we say chef. What kind of chef? You mean like an omelet bar, right?

1:01:33🔗 Caller Yeah, the kind that makes business like a what?

1:01:36🔗 Adam What kind of chef is he?

1:01:38🔗 Caller Well, he works at a restaurant. You know, a fine dining restaurant.

1:01:43🔗 Adam Oh, really?

1:01:45🔗 Drew Is it sushi? Is it vegetable or?

1:01:47🔗 Adam Modesto.

1:01:48🔗 Caller His official title is a night chef day cuisine.

1:01:52🔗 Adam Prep guy. He's chopping cabbage on that. All right. So listen, Liz, you need to have a talk with him. And forget about, you know, oral sex or, you know, holding out on each other.

1:02:03🔗 Drew I mean, just have a talk about this, this relationship, this marriage. Come on.

1:02:06🔗 Adam And Liz, you sound confused. Like you don't know men very well and all that kind of stuff.

1:02:13🔗 Caller Well, I know that I turn to physical love for a way of any kind of love because I had a dad and my father was an alcoholic and that's a whole new can of worms.

1:02:25🔗 Adam All right.

1:02:25🔗 Drew All right. I know why I picked the guy. By the way, I was sensing alcoholism.

1:02:29🔗 Adam She sounds hard edged.

1:02:31🔗 Drew That's what the guys drink a little bit. The chef. I just smell it. Liz, your husband drink a little bit now?

1:02:39🔗 Caller He does, but he kind of quit drinking.

1:02:41🔗 Drew Yeah.

1:02:42🔗 Caller We only like it.

1:02:43🔗 Drew Yeah. We quit drinking once they're alcoholic. Have to quit because they really get in going. And believe me, he didn't quit.

1:02:48🔗 Adam All right. Could you guys not have any kids, please? Why? Because this seems like it's going to make it. What day?

1:02:56🔗 Drew It's about six months.

1:02:58🔗 Adam Let's say it's a memorial day.

1:03:00🔗 Drew Yeah. Labor Day. Give it to Labor Day.

1:03:01🔗 Adam Give it to Labor Day. Oh, how about you not have any kids and how much you have a conversation with them and you both act like adults and act like you're married to each other.

1:03:10🔗 Best Of OK. All right.

1:03:11🔗 Adam And stop dragging your horrible stepdad and your bad childhood and all that. See if you could give that a rest. Let that go and deal with him. He's not your stepdad. He's not your biological dad.

1:03:21🔗 Drew She's picked that, though.

1:03:22🔗 Adam All right.

1:03:23🔗 Caller All right.

1:03:25🔗 Drew Commercial.

1:03:26🔗 Adam We got to take commercial. But Jessica's having sex with her 39 year old coworker. Agreed just to have sex. She wants a date.

1:03:35🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:03:37🔗 Adam Man.

1:03:37🔗 Drew This is this is women who don't understand men night. It really is by man or screwed up by man or can't can't believe how men actually are.

1:03:47🔗 Adam Yeah. Yeah. I just just women who got screwed up and have never recovered and seem confused. Yeah. And that's what it is. Your stepdad craps on you. Your your dad craps on you. And it's like someone who just got hobbled like they broke a bone and it never healed. Right. Just walk around the limp your entire life.

1:04:07🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:04:07🔗 Adam All right. Jorge Garcia is here tonight.

1:04:11🔗 Drew Lost.

1:04:12🔗 Caller Yeah. Lost.

1:04:14🔗 Adam How about how about every chick who's called the show tonight? Yeesh. All lost. Take a quick break. Be right back after this.

1:04:21🔗 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

1:04:24🔗 Caller Loveline will be right back.

1:04:46🔗 Adam Well, that was Jorge, don't call me George Garcia, although I did anyway. And keep on, we're going to keep on keeping on with the best of Loveline.

1:04:56🔗 Drew Great guys.

1:04:56🔗 Adam Great guys, great band, the killers. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew is in Detroit tonight, true?

1:05:12🔗 Best Of Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

1:05:15🔗 Adam What do you got? Yeah. Oh, I'm going as the Vicar of Christ until there's a new pope, by the way. So if you guys just kind of call me the Vicar, that'd be cool.

1:05:22🔗 Caller What about Detroit Vicar?

1:05:25🔗 Adam What is this? Is it two hours, three hours over there?

1:05:27🔗 Drew Three hours.

1:05:28🔗 Adam Three hours?

1:05:29🔗 Drew Good times.

1:05:30🔗 Adam Is it all of Michigan's three?

1:05:33🔗 Drew I don't know that's true or not. We're right here where it sort of switches over.

1:05:38🔗 Adam I would like for states just to go ahead and agree on whatever the whole state would be the same thing.

1:05:43🔗 Drew I think it generally is.

1:05:44🔗 Adam It's a little confusing. I like Arizona, which is... It stays the same, right? You guys go ahead.

1:05:51🔗 Caller They never change, right?

1:05:53🔗 Caller We were just in Arizona, man.

1:05:54🔗 Caller That's a great state.

1:05:56🔗 Drew By the way, what do they get at a daylight savings time? It's going to be 110 another hour. You know what I mean?

1:06:02🔗 Adam I don't know.

1:06:03🔗 Caller There's no upside.

1:06:04🔗 Adam I don't know. And Vegas is... I don't know what officially the hottest... I don't know if... I'm trying to think where the hottest state is going to be, Arizona. Death Valley is the hottest place on the planet. It's not just in the United States. And I think it's pretty much just lowest sea level gets the honor of being the hottest place. But even if Death Valley was a very, very, very nice 75 degrees every, every day, still living in a place, place called Death Valley seems like maybe you're asking for trouble. You know what I mean? But then on the other hand, maybe it's like that, like with a name like Death Valley, you got to be good.

1:06:46🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:06:46🔗 Adam You know what I mean?

1:06:47🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:06:48🔗 Adam Yeah. Never thought about that, Drew. It's like we got to...

1:06:51🔗 Caller He's from Death Valley. He's pretty awesome.

1:06:54🔗 Adam He's awesome. Yeah. You know what? It's like the handicap. You know, when you're from Death Valley, you got to work harder, but you achieve that much more. Yeah. As opposed to being from Hawaiian Gardens out here and just resting on your ass. That's why Hawaiian Gardens is a dump because they're all lazy, Drew. You know what I mean? They don't work hard.

1:07:12🔗 Drew It's called Hawaiian Gardens.

1:07:13🔗 Adam Yeah. Hey, we got a good name. We don't have to pick up our trash or empty any garbage or do any sewage or anything.

1:07:20🔗 Drew Just changed the name to Hawaiian Death Camp. Well, then now that they're picking it up.

1:07:24🔗 Adam Hawaiian Death Camp. Hawaiian Death Camp for me would be a place where I'd go, I might check it out.

1:07:30🔗 Caller I don't know.

1:07:33🔗 Caller All right.

1:07:34🔗 Caller All right.

1:07:35🔗 Adam Let's see. The killers call for the killers. People have questions or comments. Melanie? Yeah. You're 16?

1:07:42🔗 Caller Yep.

1:07:43🔗 Adam What's up?

1:07:45🔗 Caller I just want to say I'm a big fan and I'd listened to you since I was like nine. And my question-

1:07:52🔗 Adam Oh, that's me. That's me. Is that me?

1:07:56🔗 Caller What?

1:07:56🔗 Adam All right. And then a big fan of the killers too, right?

1:07:59🔗 Caller Huge fan. I've had the album since it came out. I got it the day after it came out. And my question-

1:08:05🔗 Adam Just downloaded it the very next day, huh?

1:08:07🔗 Caller No. I went to a comic book store in Massachusetts. Really? Visiting my brother.

1:08:14🔗 Adam Okay.

1:08:15🔗 Caller I went and got it.

1:08:16🔗 Drew What is he doing in Massachusetts?

1:08:17🔗 Adam But hold on a second, Drew, you know how we always say specific information, that's how you know people aren't lying?

1:08:23🔗 Caller Right, right.

1:08:24🔗 Adam She could never ever be lying about buying that in a gazillion years because she gave us a whole bunch of information we didn't need.

1:08:29🔗 Caller I didn't know we sold our records in comic book stores, which is cool. I'm not complaining.

1:08:34🔗 Adam Yeah. Well, look at it this way. It's probably them selling comic books in record stores, not records in comic book stores.

1:08:41🔗 Caller That's the way I would look at it.

1:08:43🔗 Caller Go ahead.

1:08:44🔗 Adam What was it doing at the comic book store, Melanie?

1:08:46🔗 Caller Oh, well, they sell everything. They sell like, you know, like cool clothes and records and...

1:08:51🔗 Adam You get like a halter top, a bong, a killer's CD and a Spider-Man.

1:08:57🔗 Drew What's your brother doing in Massachusetts?

1:08:59🔗 Caller He lives with his mom and I live with my dad. We have the same dad.

1:09:04🔗 Adam Bad times.

1:09:05🔗 Caller Yeah. All right.

1:09:07🔗 Adam Well, anyway. Oh, you're calling from Palm Springs.

1:09:09🔗 Caller No, actually I'm calling from somewhere, like some little town near it.

1:09:14🔗 Adam Oh, okay. But is it 122 degrees in the summer?

1:09:18🔗 Caller No, I live in the mountains.

1:09:21🔗 Drew Oh.

1:09:22🔗 Caller So it's like, I don't know, at the most like 92 here.

1:09:26🔗 Drew What are you like, in Idlewild or something? Where are you?

1:09:29🔗 Caller I live 10 minutes from Idlewild.

1:09:31🔗 Caller I live in Anza.

1:09:33🔗 Adam What are your, what are your dad's, is he like a date farmer or something? What does he do over there?

1:09:38🔗 Caller No, he drives down to Palm Desert.

1:09:40🔗 Adam He works at Costco.

1:09:42🔗 Drew Of course, of course. Adam, you should know that.

1:09:44🔗 Adam And what are you guys doing? Just living, you guys on the run from the feds or something? What are you doing up there?

1:09:49🔗 Caller No, we have like a bunch of property up here. And so we're like, well, we like California. Let's move up the mountain. Cause my dad hates people.

1:09:59🔗 Adam That's fantastic. You know, we have a Waco situation over there just a matter of days. Don't call us if the shooting starts. We don't need that kind of liability.

1:10:08🔗 Caller Oh no, we just have to worry about like meth labs.

1:10:11🔗 Adam Oh yeah.

1:10:13🔗 Caller That's all we gotta worry about. Twickerville, USA.

1:10:15🔗 Drew Yeah, that's right.

1:10:17🔗 Adam You mean your dad's meth lab, right?

1:10:18🔗 Caller Oh no, God no.

1:10:20🔗 Adam Okay, all right. All right, so do you have a question for the killers or you just want to kiss a mask?

1:10:26🔗 Caller Oh, no. My question is when did you guys like start your band? Like what was your inspiration?

1:10:35🔗 Caller Well, three years ago is when this band started. But I think inspiration would just be from all of us loving music and wanting to create music that we liked and hopefully would reach people.

1:10:49🔗 Caller Because a lot of my friends think you sound like the Cure.

1:10:53🔗 Caller We are big fans of the Cure.

1:10:55🔗 Caller They've inspired us.

1:10:57🔗 Caller Head on the Door is one of my favorite albums.

1:11:00🔗 Caller I have all of them, every single one.

1:11:02🔗 Adam You have all the Cure rounds?

1:11:03🔗 Caller Yep.

1:11:04🔗 Adam Wow, you're old school, baby.

1:11:06🔗 Caller Yeah, I am. I have all the Ramones albums too. Wow, all right.

1:11:10🔗 Adam That's cool. That's good.

1:11:12🔗 Caller Sixteen, she's got a good start.

1:11:13🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:11:15🔗 Drew Yeah, that's the thing.

1:11:16🔗 Adam Think about music. You got to have a nice eclectic collection.

1:11:20🔗 Caller Rounds you out.

1:11:21🔗 Caller All you have is music.

1:11:23🔗 Adam Right. And math, what about math?

1:11:25🔗 Caller Oh, no.

1:11:27🔗 Adam And what about dogs that walk sideways with their tails tucked in? You got those, right?

1:11:32🔗 Caller Come on, baby.

1:11:33🔗 Adam I'm going to get you a dog to walk straight for your birthday, sweetie. Your tail sticks out. That's the thing. You want to live in a place where dogs' tails just wag out, just fly. You go to a place where they're tucked in. That's a bad city. Something's wrong. Yeah. I fell asleep on a beach in Tijuana once when I was about 17 or 18 or something. And I woke up. No, no, no. No, I mean, I didn't fall asleep. We went there to sleep. We used to go to Tijuana and we just bring our sleep. Or I didn't have a sleeping bag, actually, but I just had a blanket and a pillow. And we just go get drunk in Tijuana. And then we just go drive to the beach and crash out. And it was a safer place back then. You know, it's a different Tijuana. And yeah, it was there was no crime or prostitution or anything back then. You know, that was like the mid 80s, early 80s. And but when I woke up on the beach, there were a bunch of those weird dogs circling around me. But they had the tail like the tail wasn't down. You know, tail is sucked up the ass. Like they actually suck their tail. You see the tip of it out of their mouth. It's just tail sucked in the ass. And they walk sort of bent inside.

1:12:50🔗 Caller They're bent a little bit.

1:12:51🔗 Adam And they walk sideways to always a bad town when they have the sideways walk and bent tail dog. And then good town is that tail up in the air, just like the Archie's dog. The Archie's got a dog. What was that dog's name, Drew?

1:13:07🔗 Drew Oh, I have no idea.

1:13:09🔗 Adam Yeah, but that dog, that tail would be waggon. They would. That's a happy dog. Fat dogs whose tails are up in the air going side to side. That's what we're looking for in a city.

1:13:18🔗 Drew Speaking of which, I saw that chocolate lab again today that the Discovery Channel has. Oh, I think that thing has doubled in size in like a week. It's crazy.

1:13:27🔗 Adam It's not the dog that does yoga, though, is it?

1:13:29🔗 Drew No, no, it's the one that really that really. Oh, you didn't get to see it. I think you were on stage. Is that cool chocolate lab?

1:13:34🔗 Adam We did. Drew's doing a show for the Discovery Health.

1:13:39🔗 Drew Yep. And I'm doing it. Yeah, I've got a problem.

1:13:44🔗 Adam All right, hurry.

1:13:45🔗 Drew All right. I need a couple willing to get some coaching on mutual masturbation by a therapist for television. I know. All right, but if somebody's interested in that, we got it. That's why I haven't been pimping that because it's such a weird thing to ask for. I don't know what they're going for.

1:14:01🔗 Adam We're not putting you on this show. We'll put you on Drew's TV show. Anyway, I'm doing a home improvement show on TLC, so we're both at the TLC Discovery whatever, and they got a dog over there because Animal, Discovery Animal? What do they have, 700 stations?

1:14:17🔗 Drew Yes, Animal Planet.

1:14:19🔗 Adam Yeah, they have like so many stations. They got like animal stations. They got, you know, home improvement. They got travel. They got like right nut and left nut. It's a separate channel. It's not just the testicle channel. They have the right and the left. It's all over the place, but they have a huge chocolate or puppy lab over there that evidently I missed when I was in New York. What's it doing, Drew? What's the dog doing?

1:14:43🔗 Drew It just sort of makes the rounds and makes everybody go, well, we're going to talk about animals. You know, I don't know. I never get to see what he does on stage. I want to see him backstage.

1:14:52🔗 Adam You know, it wouldn't be a bad plan just to travel around with like a three-month-old chocolate lab with the big paws and everything. No matter what, like I'd just keep it around. If your wife caught you cheating or your boss went to fire you or anything, just pull the lab out and be like, you've betrayed me, you've broke.

1:15:09🔗 Caller Oh, hey, who do we have here? Who's this? Who's this? And they just start to start, look who's here? Daddy cheated.

1:15:18🔗 Adam You know, but they'd be in a much better mood almost immediately.

1:15:21🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:15:22🔗 Adam I would like to travel around with that lab too. I saw the dog, Drew, that did yoga.

1:15:26🔗 Drew I heard about that.

1:15:27🔗 Adam Did you see that dog?

1:15:29🔗 Drew I didn't see it, I heard about it, yeah.

1:15:30🔗 Adam I don't know what that, that's, I don't know.

1:15:33🔗 Drew A very calm dog.

1:15:33🔗 Caller It doesn't know what it's doing. It's just extremely flexible, right?

1:15:37🔗 Adam Right, yeah. Well, first off, what dog can't get to itself already? I mean, what's dog even need yoga for, if you think about it? Secondly, the dog is just comatose. It's not the yoga dog. It's just half dead. It's one of these things where it's like, where they do a thing where they go like, next up on the news, a squirrel that water skis. And you go, I gotta see this. And then they just show a squirrel that's duct taped to a piece of wood that's being dragged behind a boat. It's like, that's squirrel, it's not water skiing. It's not drowning. If it jumped off the piece of wood, it would drown. Now it's just hanging on for dear life while you drag it behind a jet ski. This dog that does yoga is kinda like that too. It just sort of sits there while it's a kooky owner does yoga.

1:16:21🔗 Drew Yeah. Exactly. All right.

1:16:23🔗 Adam Remember when they would clip the Doberman's ears, Drew?

1:16:25🔗 Drew Sure. Oh yeah. They don't anymore?

1:16:27🔗 Adam I don't think they do it so much anymore. Well, maybe they do, but they would cut the Doberman's tail off and then cut their ears and then tape them up. So they look smart. Yeah. Yeah. How come no one said anything about that?

1:16:40🔗 Caller I don't know.

1:16:41🔗 Adam Okay. That's great radio, by the way, Drew.

1:16:43🔗 Drew Great question, though. Why is it done?

1:16:45🔗 Adam Drew gets the big bucks for those kinds of answers.

1:16:49🔗 Caller All right.

1:16:51🔗 Drew It's great bringing up Doberman's ears on Loveline. It's great.

1:16:53🔗 Adam I thought you knew something about something other than human anatomy, but I guess I was wrong. So I'll just limit it to medical questions from now on.

1:17:01🔗 Drew Thank you.

1:17:01🔗 Adam That's it. It's good to know.

1:17:02🔗 Caller I found out.

1:17:03🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:17:04🔗 Caller No.

1:17:04🔗 Drew As you said last night, if I step one millimeter outside of my area of knowledge, it's like a retarded kid.

1:17:10🔗 Adam It really is. Actually, you're being unfair to retarded kids.

1:17:14🔗 Drew That's right.

1:17:15🔗 Adam Michelle found a picture of a hot dog, the Archie's dog, with the bent tail. Killers took a look at it. Is that tail bent or is that tail bent? Straight up. Curlicue, yeah.

1:17:27🔗 Caller Happy town.

1:17:28🔗 Caller I think that's a happy town.

1:17:29🔗 Adam You could live in that town.

1:17:30🔗 Caller I could live in that town. Everybody's happy, a little dog is bouncing around.

1:17:34🔗 Adam Dog's rocking. You guys could use a rocking dog on stage.

1:17:38🔗 Caller We're pretty, yeah.

1:17:39🔗 Adam I mean, you guys rock, but it'd be nice to have an animal up there rocking too.

1:17:43🔗 Caller Well, we always thought that maybe we'd kind of take that Siegfried and Roy revival and maybe bring out a couple white tigers down the road. If we ever slow up and we need help with our stage actual.

1:17:53🔗 Adam If you could rock, like, if you could rock an animal, though, you would be the ultimate rock band. You know what I mean? If there's an animal up there that was really... I don't think anyone's ever rocked an animal, but if you could rock an animal, that would just let people know the killers were the greatest rock band of all time. You should find an animal, train it to rock.

1:18:11🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:18:12🔗 Adam OK.

1:18:12🔗 Caller I've been watching a lot of Animal Planet lately on this tour. That's all I've watched.

1:18:16🔗 Adam They're ones you could train. They're ones that are trainable, not the panda. They don't do anything. They're things like kiss my ass. I'm eating some bamboo. And oh, you think I'm going to F this other panda? Are you high? I don't get it on for anybody. And no, here's what the panda is saying. It's like, I'll bang this chick when I'm pulling out. What do you think of that?

1:18:36🔗 Caller She's going to finish me orally. Watch all you want. Panda style. Fly them in from all over China.

1:18:42🔗 Adam I'll bang them and I'll pull out right at the end. All right. Well, they really, they defy us, these pandas, on purpose. All we want is, and by the way, do we need extra ones of them? They're such a pain in the ass. You know what I mean? It's like we want them to mate so we can get more of them, but all they do is abuse us, subtly abuse us. I don't need any more of that. I need more dogs with the tails that bend up, not more pandas. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks. We'll take a quick break. Killers and Steer and I will be right back after this.

1:19:24🔗 Caller Loveline is brought to you by Vibrations, the award-winning vibrating condom ring at gotvibes.com. Make safe sex great and great sex even greater. You have to try it to believe it. Only at gotvibes.com.

1:19:44🔗 Adam It's Loveline, the best of Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, and we'll keep the train rolling yestera.

1:19:51🔗 Drew Oh, our favorite guest.

1:19:53🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:19:53🔗 Drew Really.

1:19:54🔗 Adam He's a good people. He's a genius, he's talented. He does all the voices. You know, I don't think people realize, we're talking about Seth MacFarlane, by the way, from The Family Guy and American Dad. I don't think people realize that he does...

1:20:07🔗 Drew Quagmire, Peter, Brian. Right. Stewie.

1:20:11🔗 Adam And he does the newscaster.

1:20:14🔗 Drew Yes. And he writes all those songs. Crazy stuff he does.

1:20:18🔗 Adam A lot of talent. We'll find out just how talented he is. That's a smooth segue, yes. Seth MacFarlane. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Seth MacFarlane is in tonight. Dear, dear friend, Seth MacFarlane. Yeah, doing all the voices. We need Stewie drums.

1:20:41🔗 Caller We can get those for you.

1:20:45🔗 Drew He's 25K now to do that.

1:20:46🔗 Adam So versatile. So versatile, Seth is. I mean, doing Peter, doing Stewie, doing Brian. I could see maybe Brian and maybe Stewie, maybe Brian and Peter, but going from Brian, sorry, going from Peter to Stewie.

1:21:03🔗 Drew I'm telling you, and the musical part, the singing of all that stuff. That is not me.

1:21:07🔗 Adam Well, it's an interesting...

1:21:09🔗 Drew That is the part that's impressive.

1:21:10🔗 Adam It's an interesting thing.

1:21:11🔗 Caller Oh, this is why I come here.

1:21:12🔗 Adam I was thinking about Matt and Trey doing a lot of singing and sort of theatrical stuff later on with South Park and other animated shows go in that direction. I wonder if it's the same mind that thinks up, that is attracted to animated stuff and that same sort of creative part of your brain that you use that can work. Both the musical and the animated.

1:21:37🔗 Caller Well, it's also one of the few mediums that people will accept big production numbers in anymore. I mean, it's, you know, in movies, you know, it's kind of hit and miss. On television, it's, you know, rarely works. But I mean, you know, cartoons, it's still far enough a move from reality that people will go for it.

1:21:54🔗 Drew Do you want to tell me, are there big orchestras anymore?

1:21:57🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:21:58🔗 Caller There's only like a handful of shows that, there's only like five or six shows that use a live orchestra. One of them being Family Guy, but it's, I mean, you have to have that to do this.

1:22:08🔗 Drew Which reminds us, there's a Family Guy CD coming out.

1:22:11🔗 Caller Oh, that's right.

1:22:12🔗 Adam Oh yeah.

1:22:12🔗 Caller In a couple of days. Family Guy Live in Vegas.

1:22:15🔗 Drew We're going to play something off that. Hopefully, if we remembered it, see if we stopped talking during the break, nobody said go to your car.

1:22:22🔗 Adam Is, now is that song, we've heard on previous Family Guy episodes or new songs?

1:22:27🔗 Caller It's not, it's mostly, it's 95% new songs. There's an extended three minute version of the Family Guy theme.

1:22:35🔗 Drew How the hell did he do that while he was doing 35 new episodes?

1:22:37🔗 Caller Well, most of it, it took us about a year to do. Most of it was done before we started work again. And the music is by Mr. Walter Murphy, who, you know, from the Fifth of Beethoven, was also a orchestrator for Doc Severinsen at one time. And just put together this amazing, you know, 55 piece orchestra. And it's, you know, it's fart jokes set to a lush musical backdrop.

1:23:04🔗 Adam So there's, well, we describe this show to the same way.

1:23:09🔗 Drew Strangely enough.

1:23:10🔗 Adam Is, now, are there any covers of any Dean Martin or Sinatra or anything like that?

1:23:16🔗 Caller There's a couple of, there's a couple of old, oldsy-timesy-type covers we've kind of spruced up, you know, hopefully added some stuff that will be, you know, it's a combination of edgy stuff and old-fashioned stuff.

1:23:30🔗 Adam Well, Seth has one in his car, which is actually an armored car, which he now drives. Actually, they back it up and they drop money off it. Every day, they back the Brinks truck up. Never comes in the driveway forward. Even in a circular driveway, they'll back up the Brinks truck.

1:23:45🔗 Drew It has so much power that it doesn't even go beep, beep, beep.

1:23:48🔗 Adam Now he had that eliminated. Yeah, it makes a cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching. That'd be an awesome sound. You know what they ought to do? Cars that back up, the backup beep thing, instead of just being the annoying meep, meep, they ought to all have their own sound. Armored trucks should have the cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching.

1:24:06🔗 Drew Or make them voice rings.

1:24:07🔗 Adam A garbage truck could have Scatman Crothers. There you go. Just rhymin or singin, then I would go for it. And you would know what size and what type of truck was comin at you. You'd know the difference between an ice cream truck backin up and a garbage truck backin up, yeah? Perfect. The good humor bell would be.

1:24:25🔗 Caller Yeah, you're a solution guy. You're an answers man.

1:24:28🔗 Adam Oh, oh. The only difference is I'm serious. Terry?

1:24:36🔗 Caller Hi.

1:24:37🔗 Adam You're, you're 17?

1:24:39🔗 Caller Yes.

1:24:41🔗 Adam What's up?

1:24:41🔗 Caller I have a couple of questions for Seth. Okay, first things first. Seth, I saw you on Adult Swim and you are so hot.

1:24:51🔗 Caller Oh.

1:24:51🔗 Caller You have the most gorgeous eyes.

1:24:53🔗 Caller Stop it. You're very kind. You haven't seen me with my glasses. Big Woody Allen frames. They're terrible.

1:25:00🔗 Caller But you're still hot.

1:25:02🔗 Adam Yeah.

1:25:02🔗 Caller Well, you're very kind. You're very kind. Where the hell were you when I was in high school?

1:25:07🔗 Drew When you were 17, exactly.

1:25:08🔗 Adam She was not going to be born for another 13 years. That's where she was.

1:25:13🔗 Caller Your friends were beating me up. That's what was happening.

1:25:15🔗 Adam That's right. Your dad's friend. All right. So what do you got to say, Terry?

1:25:22🔗 Caller Okay. I was curious if you remember my uncle, Roy Allen Smith. Yeah.

1:25:28🔗 Caller Sure, sure. Yes. Very, very talented director. Yeah.

1:25:32🔗 Adam No, that's your uncle? He directed some family guys?

1:25:37🔗 Caller Yeah, yeah. Actually, first and second season, before we got canceled the first time.

1:25:44🔗 Adam Wow.

1:25:44🔗 Drew Is he still okay?

1:25:46🔗 Adam He's, yeah, yeah.

1:25:47🔗 Caller I think so. Is he not?

1:25:49🔗 Caller Yeah. Yeah, I don't get to see him often because he lives in Cali, but.

1:25:54🔗 Adam So what's your question tonight, Terry?

1:25:57🔗 Caller And I was wondering how you would get to be a voice actress, especially on maybe one of your shows.

1:26:06🔗 Drew Especially on that, huh? You can do what I do, call everyone you know and have them bug Seth.

1:26:12🔗 Adam Or just get, just cut right to the quick and start performing oral. While Seth is doing his voiceover.

1:26:18🔗 Caller The first thing to do is develop a many, many, many deeply rooted psychological neuroses. Once you pass that point, you know, there's really no quick, easy way to get into it. That's one of the toughest businesses to get into. I, I, the only reason I'm doing it is because, you know, I created a show and it's interesting. That's, that's, I'm seeing Harold Ramis at one point talking about how he couldn't get work as an actor and so he started writing movies and he would put himself in them and that was the only way he could get it. It's very, it's very difficult. I mean, the best thing to do is to, you know, make a demo tape with as much variety as you can put together and send it to as many agents as you can find.

1:27:02🔗 Drew I mean, that's, that's, it's, you know, saying basically Mary Rich guy, you know, we had the woman that does Bart Simpson on the show years ago, and she said she went and lived with who's the good guy, Dawes, whatever, Dawes Butler.

1:27:17🔗 Caller She lived with Dawes Butler.

1:27:18🔗 Drew She like lived in a back house and studied with him or something. Remember that story?

1:27:22🔗 Adam Well, she was nuts. I remember coming around immediately.

1:27:24🔗 Drew Besides that, but she, but this was, she did a quick drama bra and stuff, and she sort of coached her on all the different ways to do this. And I was like, I think she said it was like a summer or something. It wasn't like for a long time. I got it. Yeah, that while.

1:27:36🔗 Adam Well, Terry, what do you, what do you do? Do you have some voices?

1:27:39🔗 Caller A little bit. I have a little girl voice.

1:27:43🔗 Drew Oh boy.

1:27:43🔗 Adam Oh, that's you.

1:27:44🔗 Drew All right.

1:27:46🔗 Adam We know you've been molested and you've got the gig.

1:27:49🔗 Drew Uncle. Wait a minute, Seth.

1:27:52🔗 Adam What else you got?

1:27:56🔗 Caller Something really high pitched like this.

1:27:59🔗 Adam All right.

1:28:02🔗 Caller I have a little bit of a British accent.

1:28:04🔗 Adam All right.

1:28:05🔗 Caller Not bad. Not bad.

1:28:07🔗 Drew I need a Bart's Ants.

1:28:10🔗 Adam Oh, oh, oh, yes.

1:28:12🔗 Drew The Selma.

1:28:13🔗 Adam The Patty and Selma can do all that.

1:28:16🔗 Caller Do what?

1:28:17🔗 Adam Do you do any ones we've heard of? Do you do any one on TV?

1:28:24🔗 Caller It's a little bit hard for me. I kind of sound like Meatwad from Aquatine Hunger Force, but I doubt you guys have heard of that one.

1:28:32🔗 Drew I've heard of that.

1:28:34🔗 Adam Oh yeah, we've heard of that. He's coming in tomorrow.

1:28:37🔗 Drew Go ahead.

1:28:44🔗 Caller Sorry.

1:28:45🔗 Caller Adam, Adam of Hell. I don't know.

1:28:49🔗 Adam Is he Scottish? All right, listen.

1:28:51🔗 Drew Keep working. I perfected Stewie in front of a mirror.

1:28:55🔗 Caller Yeah, that was many, many hours of staring himself in the mirror.

1:28:59🔗 Best Of He was listening to tapes.

1:28:59🔗 Adam Drew tells me he used to fill his bathtub half full and then would line it and would use it, would breathe, just leave his nostrils out of the water and breathe through it that way with the tennis ball in his mouth in order to train his diaphragm.

1:29:12🔗 Drew I told you about that?

1:29:13🔗 Caller You did.

1:29:15🔗 Adam Yeah, you were loaded, Adam.

1:29:16🔗 Best Of Very, very.

1:29:16🔗 Adam But you told me about that. It's embarrassing. Here's the thing. Here's the thing about voiceover work, stop me if I'm wrong. There is a little luck of the draw in it. It's almost a little like super talented soap opera acting, which is if you got there first and you're good and you got on the ground floor. And here's the reality. Most gigs, probably with the exception of Corsa, Peter Griffith and Homer Simpson, a few like that, most of them you could plug somebody else in and get a pretty good performance out of them. I mean, everybody I was at the ACME theater with or the Groundlings theater with, every single person with the exception of me, would actually do a really good job at almost any any voiceover gig they had. And so then it's who gets there first and who show takes off and that kind of stuff. It's got to be a tough way to plan on making a living.

1:30:08🔗 Caller Yeah, yeah.

1:30:10🔗 Adam So you should plan on acting and you should plan on writing and you should plan on doing other things. And if the voiceover now it sort of seems like the voiceover stuff, which used to be a specialty, is now going toward actors and writers and people that are in the business.

1:30:26🔗 Caller Yeah, I mean, most people, I think, would like to not confine themselves to one, you know, just to do as much as, you know, to do on camera work, to do voiceover work as much as they can get and, you know, whatever, you know, as you say, luck of the draw, whatever winds up getting them the most gigs, then...

1:30:42🔗 Adam It's just, it's just been really tough unless you were just that, just sort of crazy, like one of these legendary guys that we spoke of, like Winchell or what's his name, the guy does, but Mel Black, it's very clicky, too, the voiceover world is very, very clicky.

1:30:58🔗 Caller Like there's a handful of people who get all the work and it's, you know, it's not necessarily a good thing, but it's kind of...

1:31:07🔗 Adam It's tough work, too, because I just did some voiceover work for Seth and he's a very...

1:31:12🔗 Drew He's demanding.

1:31:13🔗 Adam Oh, he's demanding. He's so demanding, you don't think you're going to make the cut. Like I go like, all right, I had like six words and I'll give you a three, you always do three, you never do four, you never do two, but you do three, you know what I mean? You know, doing the three-take thing. Yeah, and so you do that, wow, this party sucks. Wow, this party sucks. Wow, this party sucks. And then you hear Seth go, that's great, it's perfect.

1:31:43🔗 Caller And you go, what?

1:31:46🔗 Adam One of them was like a five, but the other were clearly three. No, I think we got it. And it's like, okay, it's not.

1:31:52🔗 Caller A lot of times we'll build, you know, we'll take the first half of number three and the second half of number one.

1:31:56🔗 Adam But they're all number twos.

1:31:57🔗 Caller Believe me, Adam, you don't leave that booth until I've gotten exactly what I want.

1:32:02🔗 Adam All I'm saying is, is I, with my low self-esteem, leave and think, all right, he's decided he's not going to, he's not going with it.

1:32:08🔗 Caller Yeah.

1:32:09🔗 Adam Death is really gonna, death is gonna get his own sickle. All right. Let's take ourselves a still, so you're on 31 of, oh, and then you got to, okay, you're on 30, you're writing 31 out of 35. Right. And you'll be, and you're, you've finished four.

1:32:29🔗 Drew Adam was saying how many worktimes is going in there?

1:32:30🔗 Adam Yeah, death, and death is immediately, look, I don't like to brag about death, but I'll tell you, some of career-wise, the biggest, most favorable notices I've gotten was doing death on The Family Guy. People are fans of death. I never thought I'd say that. Oh, yeah.

1:32:46🔗 Caller Oh, yeah.

1:32:46🔗 Adam Huge death fans. And you have the figurine, for Christ's sake. You got to get me in there for a juicy death roll.

1:32:52🔗 Caller I know. We've been searching for that. The last death story we had was the one where he takes Peter through his own past. And that was powerful. That was second season. He appeared a couple of times third season, but we have yet to land on that great fourth season death story. But we'll focus.

1:33:12🔗 Drew No, I need to be the dog, though. Now, Jimmy's too big for that.

1:33:16🔗 Adam Now, that's the point.

1:33:17🔗 Drew A dog or maybe the anti-death. Somebody might conflict with you.

1:33:21🔗 Adam Listen, here's the thing about Jimmy. His kids are huge family guy fans. As a matter of fact, Jimmy was at the live presentation over at the, where was it? The Wiltern. The Wiltern. Kids are nuts about it, so they would be angry if they took Jimmy off as a death dog. And he would be, you could definitely get him in there to do more death dogs.

1:33:45🔗 Drew That might be a death store.

1:33:49🔗 Caller A death store.

1:33:51🔗 Adam Alright, we will take ourselves a little break. Seth MacFarlane is here tonight from The Family Guy, of course, and we'll be right back after this.

1:34:42🔗 Drew I dare you say that about Seth MacFarlane.

1:34:45🔗 Caller Come on.

1:34:46🔗 Adam I said the reason, you know, he was so talented, does all the voices and all the sketches and all the creative stuff is because he wasn't getting laid.

1:34:53🔗 Drew It's amazing what you could do with that energy.

1:34:56🔗 Adam That's what happens. Now he can get laid. It's fine. Oh, but back then, mm-mm. All right, that's a little something we call the best of Loveline and until next time, it's Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.

1:35:12🔗 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed in this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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