1:05🔗
Adam
That's Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Dr. Drew, board certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. Torrie Wilson, the beautiful professional wrestler, is here tonight.
1:21🔗
Adam
She's on the cover of this month's Playboy. She is, I'm reading here, a former Miss Galaxy. Now, Miss Galaxy, what's the difference with Miss Galaxy than like Miss America and Miss, Miss Galaxy got, it's a little racier, it's more bodybuilding or something?
1:53🔗
Torrie Wilson
It's, they want like a feminine physique, not too, you know, guyish looking, but also we have to compete. I actually did like Marine obstacle courses and we were timed on that. So it was half your score was physicality and the other half was how you look.
2:07🔗
Adam
Right, yeah, that's good. They don't have anything that way with guys, I don't think. I mean, they just have the Mr. Universe and all that kind of stuff, but they're not doing like obstacle courses and stuff. And then they have those fitness things. But whenever I see the fitness thing, you know, here's all, the fitness thing is great. When the guys are doing, you know, push, they're bouncing up on their hands and they're doing push-ups and they're snapping their hands and stuff, but they're smiling the whole time.
2:35🔗
Adam
I know, but I would like them to look like I look when I'm working out, which is I gotta kill myself. I hope I'm hit by a massive coronary so I can stop doing this.
2:51🔗
Adam
Just flying everywhere. But it's creepy to see people smiling who are also in like an iron cross position. It's like, this is great.
3:01🔗
Drew
But there's a Mr. Natural America and there's a Mr. America, so it's with steroids without steroids. But there's no, we need them to look a little less like a girl. Well, yeah. There's a version of that for the male. These guys look too much like women, so we gotta get them more on the male side of the fitness apparatus.
3:27🔗
Adam
Not the abs. Women, you know, the women that start to look like men, I don't know if they're doing it for men or they're doing it for their own, but it's unattractive to men.
3:38🔗
Adam
We like a fit woman. We don't see a bunch of veins going down their arms and we don't want to be crushed by any of their parts. Anyway, on the cover of Playboy, here's an interesting thing, too. Number one selling poster and video in the United States, England and Germany. Like, who's your competition in the poster department?
4:05🔗
Adam
She has the number one selling poster and video, but that's a wrestling poster and video. Yeah.
4:23🔗
Adam
I don't know. I'm just, I'm trying to think of like, where do you buy, like do you buy posters at the shop now?
4:37🔗
Adam
Yeah. Yeah. And they have these poster things. You'd flip through. It's like, hey, there's-
4:43🔗
Drew
We think about in the sixties when they had the incense burning. They had the sitar music going. And the sort of Indian like. Yeah. Another great memory from that decade.
4:55🔗
Adam
I like the head shops. You could go, you know, record stores and head shops used to be the same place. Like the people, you'd go in-
5:05🔗
Adam
It's, they would put music on. They're like CDs, but bigger. And they scratch really easy. And if you're a loser, like my dad, and you actually rented them from the library in his forties, if you just, if you just want to know how Pops was doing financially, he would go to the library and check out records in his forties. They would, they would melt in your Volkswagen.
5:29🔗
Adam
They would get warping. Yes. Very interesting. All right. So what am I missing here? Thursday Night, Smackdown, posters, Playboy, yeah. Mm hmm.
5:45🔗
Torrie Wilson
McCall's like Sun Valley. It's maybe four hours away from Sun Valley, but it's a lower budget version of Sun Valley.
5:54🔗
Adam
So how does it work? You grow up in Idaho. You realize at some point, 15 years old, you're a little bit taller, a little bit nicer looking than a lot of the other Idahoans. And you start thinking about, maybe I can get out of Idaho, and start getting to acting or modeling or something, wrestling. The wrestling couldn't have been high on your list in the 10th grade.
6:21🔗
Torrie Wilson
Yes, actually I moved from Idaho to LA to pursue acting. And I had been out here about six months and I had done all the fitness competitions and stuff. And a guy that I was dating at the time was a huge wrestling fan and took me to a show, the first show I ever watched. And we got backstage and met some of the wrestlers.
6:37🔗
Adam
Sounds like a class act, by the way. The guy you were dating was a huge wrestling fan. I'm picturing a guy who had to take the shaved calves and the ponytail.
6:44🔗
He did have shaved calves.
6:51🔗
Adam
Weightlifting pants, leather fanny pack. You see who gets the hot chicks? See, hold on. Let me talk to Drew. We see these guys and we laugh. Like we're like, look at this guy with the leather fanny pack and the stupid parachute pants. He's like, is this iced tea over here? I mean, vanilla ice over here with that. And then he goes home to this. It's like, where was it? Who are you kidding with your bronzing cream and your shaved armpits? Oh my God, come on. But then they get this. You see what I'm saying? This is why they, nah, method, method to the madness, Drew.
7:33🔗
Adam
This is why they do it. Listen, ladies, don't give guys like that sex. It only creates another thousand of them. You shacking up with that guy gives them another hundred years of leather fanny packs and shaving their legs and sort of confused bizarre sexuality that gets foisted on me. You know, these guys, these guys who wear the black high tops and have their pants pulled up around their calves to sort of show they wear their pants like knickers, but they wear the short little, no long hair? Didn't have the long hair?
8:49🔗
Torrie Wilson
He took me to the wrestling, yep. And we got backstage. You're impressed? Yeah, I was real impressed.
9:01🔗
Adam
I gotta look into that. Can you imagine this guy, you walk into his office, he's watching a little WWF and he's got his shaved calves and his fanny pack and you're like, how's the NASDAQ doing? Really? You want this guy looking after your money? This guy's telling you what to do. Put all your money into fanny packs. I don't mean into the fanny pack.
9:24🔗
Adam
I mean Fanny May, Fanny Pack, Jenny May, Jenny Pack. Yeah. Financial advisor? Oh my God, okay. So you went backstage.
9:36🔗
Torrie Wilson
A friend of ours knew a lot of the wrestlers, the guy that we were with. And so one of the wrestlers, Kevin Nash, he was booking the show at the time also. He recognized me from some of the fitness magazines and approached me and asked if I'd be interested in doing a three month storyline.
9:57🔗
Torrie Wilson
You know, I was starving and sure. So it was great money and everything kind of just snowballed. I had a great time.
10:08🔗
Adam
Yeah, see this is what they do. Let me tell you, if the guys, OK, here's what happens. Here's what happens. See, if I had Torrie, I'd keep her at home. I'd lock her up and I wouldn't let her out. You know what I mean? See, these guys, they want to show them off. They want to take them out. They want to strut them. They want to walk them around like a show dog. You know, hey, look what I got. And next thing you know, they're hanging out with guys who got more money than they are, who are taller than they are, who are better looking than they are.
10:37🔗
Adam
Who have closer shaves on their legs and may have a suede and a leather fanny pack, like a double fanny, front and back, you know? Front fanny, back fanny, rear fanny, side fanny, maybe four or five fanny packs, right? And they're going, hey.
10:50🔗
Adam
Right, and look at my beautiful, tall, blonde, Miss Galaxy girlfriend. And you start parading around a little too much and eventually she don't go back to the barn at the end of the day. You know what I'm saying, Drew? That's why I keep you at home. I would keep you at home.
11:11🔗
Torrie Wilson
You see? Because he had cheated on me many times. And I forgave him many times. And finally, after we got engaged, I just kind of.
11:18🔗
Adam
That's the other thing. They cheat on this. Yeah. All right, see, it's just like I said, Drew.
11:24🔗
Drew
Now I'm hearing sociopath, sociopath, sociopath, financial advisor, leading town with people's millions of dollars.
11:32🔗
Adam
He's a rambling fanny pack man. That fanny pack hangs on a new bed post every night, Drew. It's just like his dad used to do it.
11:50🔗
Adam
It drives me nuts. I know, I know, he says, guys, he's not too smart, but he's got a rap, right? Raps, tells you what you want to hear, comes on strong at the beginning. These guys, guys, and by the way, you know, it's another thing, we make fun of the guys with the rap. It works.
12:09🔗
Adam
That's part, that's Drew's rap. Drew's rap is pretending like he don't like other guys' raps and he doesn't have one himself, that's his rap. He's a, that's the anti-rap rap.
12:22🔗
That's a really good one.
12:31🔗
Adam
You're living in a rap vacuum, that is your rap. My rap is yelling at Drew about not having a rap. Kristin?
12:39🔗
Yeah?
12:43🔗
Caller
Okay, well, first of all, excuse me if I'm nervous, I've been listening to you for like 10 years or something, I don't know.
12:50🔗
Caller
Well, I don't know, but I remember listening to you guys like when my dad was driving home from like late night bowling league.
13:02🔗
Caller
Okay, so my question is, I became sexually active like a year ago and ever since then, I haven't really had sex very often, like maybe once a week or like sporadically like that, just not very many times. And I sometimes like lead almost every time.
13:28🔗
Drew
Little, but she's 20 and they've been together a while. And it's some women that is just normal. You want the birth control pill? And that is probably the reason you're doing this. It can create a little instability in the lining of the uterus sometimes or an overgrowth. And this just the stimulation of sex can sometimes cause bleeding. And it may just be you. That may just happen even without the pill, but it's very common on the pill.
13:50🔗
Caller
So, well, it even happened like before, obviously, when I started having sex. Is that like because obviously like it was the first time and I was like breaking in, I guess. Is that maybe why as well? Because I'm not like loose in a hoe or something.
14:09🔗
Drew
The bleeding actually comes from your uterus, not from the vagina. So it's something a little different. It's not like you're ripping or something is opening up. It's all all fine. It's all good. Don't worry about it. All right. Do you have do you have pelvic exams regularly?
14:28🔗
Drew
So just make sure you get them regulated. And, you know, if you have any question, use a condom also.
14:33🔗
Adam
Let me ask this. There is this sort of wives tale about women loosening up ridiculous from having sex. But, you know, we talk about how a woman, if she's nervous, that's right, be a little vaginismus in there.
14:53🔗
Adam
But it is ultimately ends up like, it's like saying, well, when you open your hand, it's not like your muscles get looser in your hand. I mean, it's like, if I held my hand like this and I loosen them up, it's not like my fingers get yoked out. It's just that I relax my grip a little bit.
15:21🔗
Adam
It gets to that. Yeah, whoa. We're about, yeah, no, we're down the rap road with Drew. This date number like, eh, 30, 35. That's when the fist part of the rap comes in. We just get the head there, that's all. No, what I'm saying is, is we talk to people all the time. They're like, well, now she's loosened up because she's been with a bunch of partners. But you end up relaxing and it feels like you're loosening up.
15:56🔗
Adam
Yeah, I don't think exploiting women sexually is provocative. Sorry if I'm crazy. That's my rap.
16:06🔗
Drew
The list, that women, part of the women's anatomy is designed to handle the head of a child and then go back to normal, okay?
16:18🔗
Drew
But I mean, you're talking about, you know, yay big versus, you know, substantially less stressed on the system, so.
16:27🔗
Drew
And it still goes back to normal most of the time, so I mean, it's just the idea that, I think men want to think that they can do that to a woman. They have some sort of fantasy that they can do that.
16:36🔗
Adam
I think there's also the idea that we want to be able to tell if a woman has been marked or something.
16:52🔗
Yeah.
16:56🔗
Caller
Well, I'm going to have this checkup. We've been going on for about four months now and we're finally making it public. And the thing is, I don't know how impressive, Harry.
17:20🔗
Adam
I can tell you what it said. I cut it out and put it on the fridge. We'll read it during the break.
17:30🔗
Caller
But anyways, her parents are like man-hating Quakers. And I'm Celtic and she's all like clean cut like her parents are. And I have a Mohawk.
17:40🔗
Adam
What year are we in? We're in 1180. The Quakers, your Celtic. Torrie's a shaker. That's great. What's a Celtic thing?
17:57🔗
Caller
Oh, no, no, no. It's just religion clashing. Like she's like really like, like her parents are like really into it.
18:25🔗
Caller
Well, no, I was growing up Celtic, like me and my whole family are Celtic and you know, like.
18:40🔗
Adam
You're a dude? That's for fat chicks. Yeah. So you're gay. So you, that just means your family screwed up and pissed off, right?
19:11🔗
Adam
The hippie is sort of, but people don't know this, but my family's this way. It's where the road, it's where Lazy Avenue and Angry Street cross.
19:21🔗
Adam
And people just think it's laid back, but it's really sort of angry and lazy. It's I'm depressed, I can't get out of bed, but I'm gonna blame it on the man.
19:34🔗
Adam
Yeah, I could look for a job, but I'm not because the man's holding me down. Steve? Yeah.
19:41🔗
Adam
Yeah, it's a depression too. All right, so Steve. Yeah. How about you put down your wiccan, I don't know what you guys have, baskets. That might be wicker.
19:55🔗
Adam
Yeah, put down the wic, and she can put down. You put down the broom, and she puts down the wiccan oats. And you guys bury the hatchet and move forward.
20:18🔗
Drew
So really, the problem here, the really hard problem is your parents see a guy in a Mohawk and they're freaked out, her parents. So how about just letting them get to know you as a person and maybe even maybe tone down your parents a little bit of your girlfriend, somebody you really like and you truly want to impress the parents. If that's really your goal to impress the parents, you can do that.
20:39🔗
Drew
And I know you want to be an individual because everybody with a Mohawk is doing it to be an individual yet they all look like the same.
20:51🔗
Adam
Just dress like a human being, would you? Stop expressing yourself all you a-holes. You're driving me nuts. These guys, these guys got attitude. Look at them. People, you really want to express who you are by your haircut or the way you dress, the music that comes pouring out of your car window. Here's your job. We shouldn't know you're alive. Here's who should know your life. Quiet down, your boss, your wife, your kids.
21:27🔗
Adam
I don't want to smell you. I know these guys with these huge dreads and their head smells like ass. You can stand behind them in line and you're about to puke because they got a bird goddamn nest on their head. Or Mr. Rockabilly guy or Mr. Sports guy, Mr. Whatever guy. Just stop it. Just keep it to yourself, would you? You idiots. Stop it. I don't want to know you're into extreme sports, all right? Take the racks off the car. Take the bumper stickers off. Just stop it. That's everyone. Just put on a pair of sweatpants. Just calm down. Fanny packs, sweatpants.
22:05🔗
Torrie Wilson
I just think that's funny. Because maybe they look at you and think the same thing about you.
22:11🔗
Adam
Yeah, but to say I'm nothing is not exactly a visual assault. You know what I mean? I mean, just wear a pair of pants and a shirt. Make, you shouldn't be trying to convince anyone of anything by the boots you're wearing. That's all I'm saying.
22:28🔗
Torrie Wilson
Well, maybe his group of friends, you know, they're all like that and he wants to fit in.
22:32🔗
Adam
Idiots, idiots. Whenever I see someone trying to make a statement that way, I just think this guy's overcompensating. He doesn't feel comfortable in his own skin, so he's gotta like pick a team. See what I'm saying? It just feels like, it feels like compensation. I wish the world would start shunning these guys and you women would stop having sex with these guys.
22:53🔗
Adam
They're interesting until you scrape past their very thin veneer and then there's nothing there. It's just a guy at the fanny pack who cheats. That's all you got, right? There's nothing there. Here's how you know there's nothing there. They're showing you everything. It's all window dressing. If there was something there, they wouldn't have to do all the tats and the piercings and the whole thing. They'd leave that at home.
23:16🔗
Adam
No, they are exquisitely uncreative people. That's the ironic part. You would think they would be creative.
23:23🔗
Drew
But wait a minute. But what they are letting you know is they got energy and they're angry.
23:27🔗
Adam
They do got energy. They got angry. And people like that. Not necessarily angry. A lot of them are. The other one's just got, you know, I got stuff. We're gonna have a good time. You know, we're not just gonna, you know, go home and put in a Salisbury steak hungry man.
23:45🔗
Adam
No, you can watch me watch Tevo. And once you're watching the set, you watch me, you actually.
23:57🔗
Adam
Had to do that tonight. Torrie Wilson is here tonight. Professional wrestler, cover of Playboy Magazine. Oh, Drew.
24:08🔗
Drew
A little plug-away. This is once again, the Girl Next Door promotion. Our listeners did not, they came through a little bit better than I before, but still woeful. Really woeful, shameful, shameful. Really, seriously, you got it? Woeful. Sign up at girlnextdoortickets at earthlink.net or girlnextdoortickets at earthlink.net. Get passes to come to the April 7th screening of this movie, The Girl Next Door, at the Arclight in Hollywood. And for any caller 17 years of age or older who gets on the air tonight, we will send them a pair of tickets to see this film near them. Mm-hmm. Opens April 9th.
24:39🔗
Adam
Now I think Torrie's dating a new guy. He's like a rockabilly or he's got a bunch of tans or earrings or something.
24:45🔗
I married him actually.
24:56🔗
Adam
Well, look, first off, I don't want to talk too much smack because, you know, he's a huge guy, I'm sure. Number one. Number two, although I would box him.
25:26🔗
Adam
It becomes a way of life. And hey, if that's what it's gonna take to separate you. You know, a lot of guys and chaps at that bar, you got the one with the clean shaved ass. Do you know what I'm saying? If that's what it takes, that's what it takes. Okay, let's talk about the hetero, guys. All right, let's take a break here. Yeah, let's regroup.
25:55🔗
Caller
As many as one in three Americans with HIV don't know it. To find a testing location near you, call toll free, 1-866-344-KNO.
26:16🔗
Adam
Phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Torrie Wilson, the beautiful Torrie Wilson, is here tonight. She's on the March cover of Playboy, which is out as we speak.
26:50🔗
Adam
Yeah. Hot selling. Former Miss Galaxy and of course Thursday Nights on UPN's Smackdown. All right. Let me say this, Drew. Drew's been yapping in my ear about the FCC and he's all worried about it. And I told him I don't want to hear about any of that nonsense because I don't want to hear about any of that nonsense. But they're worried that Drew's worried. Well, here's what happens with Drew. Drew likes to, he's a Jewish mother hen. He just has to worry and fret and wring his hands and always worry about what happens. And if someone says like, hey, look out, he'll just, he'll go screaming. The night all this horrible FCC stuff went down after the Janet Jackson thing and all that kind of stuff. We got a little talking to about, you know, mellowing out. Drew didn't talk for the first 20 minutes. He just nodded his head. That drew me. Hey, if I don't open my mouth, I'm not going to get fired for at least a week. If I start talking, we could be out of here in a matter of hours. But they have not focused on violence to the best of my knowledge. And I know there's no violence on radio, but I was thinking about wrestling and how all this stuff had affected them or it did affect us or not.
28:07🔗
Adam
As well. And I'm sure that's what they focused on. I had not seen and as an atheist, I always find this horribly ironic that, you know, you know, UPN runs Conan the Barbarian Uncut for two hours on a Sunday night. And the only letter they get is a boob was exposed. Meanwhile, Conan lopped off 30 or 40 heads and no one said anything. I imagine with the wrestling, it's more the sexual part of it that the FCC or the powers that be are having trouble with unless the pile driving part. Oh, yeah.
28:41🔗
Torrie Wilson
A lot of that actually has changed over the past year as far as violence and everything. You know, they in the past, they have the men have touched the women.
28:57🔗
Adam
Yeah. No, that's how it goes. You gotta give the kiddies what they want, you know? I mean, I mean, it is, it is, it's funny. I mean, it's sort of natural. I don't know why it took so long for wrestling to sort of spin off in a slightly more sexual direction. If you think about who's watching it, what's on the minds of the people that are watching it, guys wearing underpants or greased up going at it, how long is that going to go on before we start getting some boobs into the mix and who's going to complain about this? You know what I mean? I mean, it's like serving beer at a ball game. How many seasons before you bust open the keg? Who are you going to offend by serving some beer? This is exactly what these people, I'm surprised it didn't come in in the 50s.
29:46🔗
Adam
Yeah. Which in boxing, they never show, by the way. They're always in the corner with the guy like, hey, come on, let's go. That's why I catch a little ass or thigh. No, they don't. Well, not on TV. They're always right into the corner and it's always the announcer and it's the Mexican fighter and the announcer and the guy has the same voice. So you're not trying hard enough. You've got to throw more punches. First off, I don't need this translated. This is imagine. I imagine this is what goes on in the corner. Try harder, throw more punches. And it's just weird how much of nothing goes on and you'd think it would be something very specific.
30:23🔗
Adam
The fighter would be saying, cut me and Mick would be saying, I'm going to throw in the towel. Or your kids, you know, your kids being held hostage and the gangsters now. It's always like, you've got to try harder. He's trying harder than you. Yeah, it's real boring. And it's the same guy does all the translations, Drew. But anyway, yeah, they should start showing the ringer. I agree. So you guys had to reel in the sexuality a little bit. But the violence, and this is my point, violence, no big deal. And I've not heard anyone talk about violence.
30:53🔗
Torrie Wilson
I think it has. I think it has made a difference in violence. I mean, you don't see blood like you used to.
31:04🔗
Adam
Well, that's true. You're not perfect. Yeah, because I got a venereal disease. Lena? You're 17?
31:15🔗
Caller
I have a question for Dr. Drew and for you, Adam, but that's afterwards. I have like these bumps down there. It's not like a lot of them. There's three of them. And like one I've had for like seven months. And two I've recently discovered.
31:38🔗
Drew
They're that kind of thing. It's a carbuncle basically. Or a folliculitis. It's all the same kind of thing.
31:55🔗
Drew
Nah, it's just other things. But if it's, you know, if white comes out, then that's what that is.
32:02🔗
Adam
Well, no, I mean, I used to have a little thing on my back that would fill up every once in a while and squeeze it out and be like a little toothpaste.
32:13🔗
Adam
Yeah, it's nice. It's gone now. I tell you, I had this idea. Torrie, be honest with me. I'm telling you, it could be a moneymaker. I take guys who got the zits on their backs and shoulders and I pair them up with chicks with long nails who can't stop, you know, cause women go nuts. You know, a guy takes his shirt off. Like, you want to know how to torture a woman? It is torture. Here's a torture one. Torture a woman, take a guy, have the guy take his shirt off, have a nice big old zit on his back and then just have the room, just duct tape her to a chair.
32:47🔗
Adam
Just turning in a hole, veins coming out of her forehead, tearing the tape, breaking out. The women go insane to pop a back zit. I like popping a zit myself, but for women-
32:59🔗
Drew
I think the big old sebaceous-ist is probably more what people are into, where you can really just get that-
33:03🔗
Adam
There's nothing, there's nothing, there's nothing better. And it's great going after a zit.
33:26🔗
Adam
Here's what I do. I get together a bunch of guys with bad backs and a bunch of women with long nails who like to pick, and I start making some money. I tell the guys, look, five minutes, I'm going to need 75 bucks for you to get these hot chicks to go at your back. Then I go to their chicks. Yeah, I got some guys with some real doozies.
33:46🔗
Adam
And I'm just laughing like a mania. I create a safe and sterile environment. I pump in some Muzak. You have some Kenny G blowing in the background. I give you, maybe I give you some latex gloves and a little-
34:02🔗
Torrie Wilson
That sounds fun, but I would never want to pick someone's back that I don't know.
34:09🔗
Adam
Oh, you wrestle. What do you, I drive a truck. Wow, that's interesting. Before you know it, you're thick as thieves.
34:18🔗
Adam
Let's go to your back. Let her look at you. And you say that, you say that until I take a stranger and just turn him to you and that thing's just wanking at you.
34:32🔗
Adam
You want me, don't you? Yeah, you go after it eventually. Look at her, she's getting uncomfortable. Thinking about her sitting, thinking about that nail going in there. Yeah, Drew, this is a real moneymaker for me. Real moneymaker. Next thing you know, we start selling videos. Oh. I would watch a video.
34:51🔗
Adam
Zits gone wild. Just pow. Just big zits erupting. Hot chicks, high heels, snapping zits in the back.
35:04🔗
Adam
Be great. I would watch a video. Here's, I swear. I would watch a video. Drew, you can score it.
35:28🔗
Torrie Wilson
Yeah, I think I could. On video, it's different. When you're doing it for yourself, that's one thing.
35:34🔗
Adam
Well, that's what a woman, that's what a woman picks a man's zit for herself. Like she wears panties, nice lingerie, that's for her.
36:09🔗
Drew
Well, wait, then somebody from Florida is in the room here with us. Let's explain it to her.
36:13🔗
Adam
Here's how the game is played. First, let's hear the theme song, Anderson. Do you have that?
36:30🔗
Adam
Yeah, that was your dad's. There's 10 of them. Well, play them all. That was your dad's theme. Let's hear the next one. Let's hear the next one. What's Tori Amos?
36:45🔗
Drew
Is that pink? No, that was Tori Amos again, I think. Jump ahead to 10, Ken. Come on. We're trying to get to the one that's most recent.
37:11🔗
Sex, meth and death fetishes.
37:16🔗
Germany or Florida.
37:17🔗
Adam
What's that one labeled, Ken? Of course, of course. There's a method to Anderson's madness. All right, Germany or Florida. All bizarre stories, usually involving a crime, emanate from either Germany or Florida. We hear the story and then decide, is it Germany or Florida? Pete? All right, you ready?
37:44🔗
Caller
Unable to capture a crow that had attacked a woman and a young girl, police went to a secret weapon, getting the bird drunk on cat food soaked in high alcohol fruit schnapps. Bird was completely smashed, said a police spokesperson, adding that the crow was sleeping off its hangover in a local animal shelter.
38:19🔗
Adam
All right, and the crows, here's the thing in Florida. If a bird attacks someone in Florida, that person shoots them.
38:43🔗
Adam
All right, it's important not to work schnapps or hosen into the question. Just say, got the bird drunk. Although I'm sure there's a fair amount of people strung out on like the peppermint schnapps in the Florida area.
38:57🔗
Adam
I'll tell you, I had this bird related idea. Torrie would probably appreciate it. Maybe better than my zit popping idea, perhaps. Half the guys I eat lunch with are on this Atkins diet now. And it's really ridiculous because when we eat pizza for lunch, they're scraped the cheese and the anchovy and the pepperoni off into this ball of just greasy artery clogging calories and then eat that and put the thing somewhere. If you knew nothing about the Atkins diet and you saw them scraping the top of the pizza off, it would look like a comedy routine because you'd see them scraping the pizza. You go, I guess he's on a diet. He's counting his calories. Then he would start eating what he post-gaped off and you'd be laughing like, you think you're watching Mexican television. This is hysterical.
39:49🔗
Adam
So anyway, I start watching this and I see now these guys, they get the hamburger, they pull the bun out, the cheese out and they got the bun. They throw that away and the pizza carcass gets tossed and all this stuff and the croutons get picked out of the salad and I thought, these guys need a bird.
40:04🔗
Adam
Because, you know, birds love this crap. I mean, that's what they love. They love the croutons and the buns and you see the old people picking them at the park and it breaks my heart that you scrape all these pizzas off and you take all the buns off. It just goes right into the garbage. You can't really do anything with it. And I don't want your bun with your little mayonnaise on it. I'm not gonna eat that. You know, I'd eat a burger, but I'm not gonna. And it just all gets, here's the thing. It's getting tossed. Like we're tossing millions of tons of just, you know, buns and pizza and crust and croutons now because people just order and then they just modify. They don't order a hamburger minus the bun. They just order a hamburger and throw away the bun. If we got these people a bird.
40:52🔗
Adam
Yeah. We could give them a bird or a fat guy. Either way, we assign them, we pair them up. So here's a guy and he's just sitting there and he's on the Atkins Dine. He's got an ostrich, you know.
41:05🔗
Adam
He's got to get rid of the bird. He eats the bird. He fattens the bird up, eating the empty carbs. And then eventually fattens the bird up and eats the bird.
41:18🔗
Adam
Yeah, but it could be a Finch or Macaw. It could be any bird. They all eat buns. You see what I'm saying? And this is what I do. That's a great idea. That's a great idea.
41:35🔗
Adam
You're like a pirate. It's great. And I train my bird to say things. He's on my shoulder. You know what I'm saying?
41:43🔗
Adam
All right. Let's take a break. Torrie Wilson here tonight. We'll, let's see. What night is it? SmackDown. Oh, we already missed this. Is it Thursday? Yep. Yeah, well next Thursday, watch the UP on SmackDown. She'll be getting someone in a suplex. I will take a quick break. We'll be right back. Bye Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Torrie Wilson is here tonight. She can be found on the cover of the March edition of Playboy, as well as on the SmackDown UPN, Thursday Nights. And it's April 1st, you know? Just thinking about some kind of April Foolsy thing.
42:43🔗
Drew
You're in, no, you're too late. You just gave it away. No, no way, is I gonna do that? Too much effort.
42:58🔗
Adam
To shut it down something. Yeah, it's too easy. Call someone and F with them. And I appreciate the fact that no one did anything to me.
43:14🔗
Drew
I was at her house that she was going to stop ice skating. I was like, yes. I'm like, yes.
43:23🔗
Adam
Yeah. The skates are very expensive in ice skating, Torrie. You know, you must have started out doing something, right?
43:35🔗
Torrie Wilson
In McCall, yeah. We had a little outdoor. But no competing. Oh, no, no. There was nothing like that in Idaho.
44:03🔗
Adam
I didn't know... I didn't know, like, I don't know if stuff's cheaper now, or maybe I'm just running with a faster crowd, but owning your own bowling ball, for instance, like, if you own your own bowling ball, you're a professional bowler. You didn't own your own ball unless you were on the tour. You could have been on a senior's tour or something like that, but owning your own skates meant you're a professional skater, hockey player, whatever. Like, I didn't know anyone who owned, you know...
44:34🔗
Adam
Having golf clubs was crazy. Like, once in a while I'd go to one of my friend's house, their dad had golf clubs and stuff. What'd he do? Take those from the... No, those are his. Well, who, well, how does he... Well, he's gotta get them back, all right? I mean, what's he, how's he...
44:50🔗
Adam
He's in the tour, right? He's doing tour? No, normal people just go buy stuff and bring it home. You understand?
45:05🔗
Caller
And I've always been looking for a guy that likes to sex with as much of me. And this guy.
45:44🔗
Right on, because I'm pretty hot, too, so he...
45:48🔗
Adam
Yeah, unless he's, if he has a half the genetic hand Torrie had dealt to her, he's done.
46:02🔗
Adam
Boise State. Yeah. All right. He'll be in construction about 18 months. Jules, maybe to hook up, huh? So you like sex a lot.
46:15🔗
Yes.
46:19🔗
I'm a freak.
46:20🔗
Caller
Like, I like to put costumes on, like school girl outfits and stuff like that. And I'm a security guard, so I have a security guard outfit anyway. Yeah.
46:32🔗
Uh-oh.
46:36🔗
No, I'm not.
46:41🔗
Adam
She started off at 132 and then she's like, I'm calling from Boise, she chinged you up to 152. I'm a security guard. 196 now. No, she's got to tell me she likes black powder rifles, ching, that hops into like 250. Just keep, I'm into Wicca religion, now we're into the fours. I know guys do this, right? You just, she said security, ching, 40 pounds, it's got thrown right under her scale, right? Very sad, very sad Drew that you have to judge. Very sad that you feel compelled to judge. I don't judge, that's me.
47:24🔗
Adam
Torrie Wilson here tonight. Sexy, beautiful Torrie Wilson. We're gonna take a quick break. We'll get back with Jules. Maybe set him up with your brother. Oh yeah. All right? All after this.
47:35🔗
Caller
Alright guys, here's the deal. You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person?
47:40🔗
One call is all you need to make.
48:24🔗
Adam
Hey everybody, it's the Love Line, I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number, 1-800-L-V-E-1-9-1. Torrie Wilson is here tonight. You can see her on Thursday Night SmackDown on UPN, also on the cover of this month, this last month. I don't know. Maybe it's still on the newsstand, or maybe they've had a little change in the guard. She's on the cover with Sable. Yeah, how's Chyna doing? We just brought her up during the commercial.
49:15🔗
Adam
Stanford. Gotta have a nice pad over there, yeah? Yeah? Oh, sure. Yeah. It's gotta be a little weird over there, too, though.
49:31🔗
Torrie Wilson
No, he hasn't. But he has a very strong presence. He's very intimidating. It's amazing to see these huge, big guys be so intimidated by this man. It's, I mean, they make fools of themselves sometimes.
49:51🔗
Adam
Yeah, you take these guys, the next thing you know, they're checking IDs out front of a Hooters. Yeah. Just send them back to the bouncer world. Because, you know, big guys, they got wrestling, they got bouncing. And then they got...
50:10🔗
Adam
Well, you got the guys, he's the money manager with the fanny pack. Would you like a card?
50:20🔗
Adam
That would be a bad thing. It's all right. I'm driving the Mini Cooper tonight. They respect that. They love a guy in a gay car. Jules?
50:49🔗
Caller
Well, like, I'll wake up in the middle of the night and I'll be like, you know, I'll like surprise him by going down on him and stuff. But then when it comes to having sex, he's all, nah.
51:08🔗
Adam
Middle of the night, that can be erotic, but it's also can be tough, especially during the winter months. I mean, you're really nestled in, you're asleep. You know what I mean?
51:21🔗
Caller
No, it doesn't happen every night, but like sometimes in the morning or when we're going to bed or we're cuddling on the couch and he knows, he like teases me and then expects me not to react with that. And he knows better not to tease me. But-
51:39🔗
Caller
No, no, we like watching a movie, okay? And he'll like start kissing my neck or, you know, rubbing his hand to my legs. And then he knows he's teasing.
51:50🔗
Drew
And then I'm like- So when you get aroused, you're sort of like a male this way, when you get aroused, you have to fan. No, you can't say that on the radio.
52:06🔗
Adam
Yeah, by the way, how much of the F word do you hear on the radio that people think it's on? We get that all the time, the S word and the F word, and they're like, why? Like, have you ever heard the F word while you're just driving your car along and you hear the F word coming on the radio? Like, will you use it in advertising? McDonald's would be using it if you could use it.
52:30🔗
Drew
In this legislation that's coming through now, you can't say F or F word or S word. Any innuendo is considered as offensive as the actual word.
52:41🔗
Adam
No, that's not gonna happen. What do you think? This is communist Germany, Drew? Hold on, now I gotta yell at Jules some more. Jules. All right, first off, were you abused? You got that little girl voice. You sound like you're sexually abused.
53:04🔗
Caller
Oh, no. My brothers, I have all older brothers and they would have killed somebody if that happened.
53:39🔗
Adam
Perfect lady yelling the F word 10 seconds ago on the radio. Yeah, oh yeah, she's, oh yeah, she's hella wheeze, this one. She should write a book, etiquette.
53:51🔗
Adam
Yeah, see, stick your pinky out when you're drinking tea. Lady always crosses her legs when she sits down in a-
54:04🔗
Drew
All right, listen, this is again what mystifies men, is that there's jewels in the world and then there's other women that just could not be further from that in terms of their responsiveness.
54:13🔗
Drew
And that's, again, men are mystified by that, but that's the reality, that there's a lot of diversity amongst women in their response. Jewels has more of an engine going than her boyfriend.
54:23🔗
Drew
And the boyfriend seems to have a little bit of a, I'll use a strong word, sadistic pleasure in seeing her frustrated.
54:30🔗
Drew
It sounds like a little bit. It does seem weird. And it may be sort of a cover, a defense, for him not being able to keep up with her.
54:38🔗
Adam
Yeah, I can't. She says, and Jules was like a, it's like a bad tooth. I can't stop flicking with my tongue. Jules?
54:48🔗
Drew
No, no, no, no, I'm not. I'm not at all. I'm explaining why it is, and I don't think it's a good thing.
55:26🔗
Adam
The old Adam didn't care, but would still care enough to yell at the people who tried to lie to me on the radio. The new Adam is more Gandhi-esque. He does not care.
55:35🔗
Drew
Here's the deal, Jules. You have a right to assert certain things in the relationship that at least you're biological, and at least he appreciates what you're actually asking from him, then you kind of step up. And we say this to women too, in terms of it pertains to men. Is it that he shows some empathy, some appreciation for what it is that you need and your biology needs, and he needs to help take care of that with you.
55:58🔗
Yeah.
56:03🔗
Yeah, but before I get to that, I want to ask Dr. Drew, what's the name of his book that came out?
56:10🔗
Caller
Cracked? Okay. And what's your full name? So I can, I want to go to Barnes and Noble and see if I could find it there.
56:34🔗
Adam
I just realized I couldn't run a bookstore because I couldn't stand all those lackeys sitting around reading my product and not ever buying anything. Once, twice a year, I go into a bookstore and a place is packed full of losers. Just sitting there, actually, just moving from one book to the next one, magazine. They got a cup of coffee that they didn't buy from me. They bought it up the street at Starbucks. Now they're on hour number nine of camping out my aisle. Like I would just go down, like, hey, you, yeah, you with the suede patches. Out, out, like seeing your ass in here. Yeah, get out, let's go. Either start playing or you're out. I seen your ass in here with your mock turtleneck for like the last, every day for the last two weeks. Now get your ass out of here, you bought nothing. You bought a goddamn book marker. Cost 99 cents, get out. I went, listen, reading the book, reading the magazines, that's the product. I can read a magazine just standing there at the stand and put it back. All right, I'm done.
57:35🔗
Adam
I don't want your ass in the store unless you're buying something. I get right on the PA and start yelling at it every time. Don't make me release my wild monkey that will attack all of you. It'll get all on your heads. Torrie, I would have a monkey, but it'd just run up and jump on top of the end, and then land on your head and just grab your glasses off, notch your ears. I'd say anyone who's stationary, you grab them. I'd tell the monkey that. And then I'd have my car bird go after you too. Big macaw flying over.
58:13🔗
Caller
I read on the WWE webpage that originally Stacey Keebler and Jackie Greeden or something like that was gonna be in the Playboy issue that was coming out and it was even announced on Raw. But then when the book came out, they had Sable and Torrie in it. And I wanted to know what happened there or if she knew what happened.
58:41🔗
Torrie Wilson
It was, I don't know that it was on WWE webpage. If it was, it was a mistake. They did a storyline for WrestleMania. Sable and I wrestled against Jackie and Stacey Keebler and the storyline was that they were jealous cause they weren't in Playboy.
59:34🔗
Adam
Yeah, it's too much. Like, it's like when you're talking to some patients, like how many Vicodin would you say you've taken over the years? It's just like, it's, I need help.
59:58🔗
Adam
There you go. It absolutely does. Let me tell you something. This internet, it's a double-edged sword. Like, you find out stuff that gets you excited, then once in a while you get burned by it. Like, a couple months ago when someone at the office said, hey, there's this porn film with Gina Lee Nolan in it. Oh, yeah, I heard that. It's gonna be out in a few days. And I was like, okay. Who's that? See, all, yeah, Drew doesn't know anything, but the point is she's a smoking hot blonde chick, and I got my whack-and-bib on. I was like, let's go. When is that baby coming out? And every day, it'd be like, that video coming out? That was six months ago, nothing. You know what I mean? And that kind of stuff, it's difficult, it's stuff. It's hard to talk about, you know?
1:01:16🔗
Adam
I was walking toward the Odyssey video. It was very erratic, Drew. I was thinking about the movies I was going to rent.
1:01:39🔗
Caller
And Adam, I can't keep my girlfriend from popping blackheads on my face. I try to hold her back. I can't stop her. Wow.
1:01:47🔗
Adam
Ace is tough. Back is the domain of the woman because the back is, it's really like some canvas that no one ever sees the painting on. You know what I mean? You're free to experiment on it. Oh, right.
1:02:06🔗
Caller
Well, my question is, my girlfriend and I, we've been going out for about nine months now and we're kind of at the stage in our sex life where it's almost like the novelty stage or we're just kind of trying everything out, just kind of having fun and experimenting.
1:02:27🔗
Caller
I'm just kind of curious about the health risks for her because I'll be wearing a condom. So I'm not sure that I have anything to worry about, but I was just curious about the health risks for her.
1:02:43🔗
Adam
Yeah, now what about that, Drew? How does that work? And by the way, you got a chick who's already going after the blackheads on the nose, you know you got a gamer.
1:03:04🔗
Drew
New TV show. All right, look, there are actually consequences. Then some women have them and some do not. Basically, your body will tell you if you're doing something that's harmful by giving you pain or hers well anyway. And yeah, you can cause rips and terrors and fistulas and carbuncles and I mean, it's gonna be a mess.
1:03:31🔗
Caller
What about any kind of like infection or any kind of like sickness or anything like that?
1:03:36🔗
Drew
Except for the fistulas, carbuncles, hemorrhoids, terrors and stricturings, those are illnesses. And then they're pretty common.
1:03:46🔗
Adam
I didn't know she was 17. Here's the thing, 20 and 17, it's a little gappy there. Little gappy for the anal.
1:03:55🔗
Adam
Too big anal gap. Yeah. Too big anal chasm. You can't build a bridge over that anal chasm.
1:04:10🔗
Adam
Here's the thing. Okay, here's the deal. If you're a 20 year old guy and you're dating a 17 year old, it's kind of an adult dating a high school girl, essentially. And whereas it may be legal in Colorado where he's calling from, and maybe you guys are great, you know, you guys have fun, she picks your sits, you're a good guy.
1:04:31🔗
Adam
But you're not dating someone who's three formative years younger than you are. Hold off on throwing out the anal cart. Leave a little something. Yeah? Torrie, yes?
1:04:51🔗
Adam
Yeah, wait till you're married. Have something left. That's the way God wanted it. It's in the scriptures.
1:05:11🔗
Adam
85 minutes? Wow. I'm going to take him when he's exactly 85 minutes. He's 84, 54, 55, 56. It's great radio. 8, 9, and 85. Yeah, Peter. On hold for 85 minutes. Straight up, Drew. Look at that, buddy.
1:06:01🔗
Caller
Yeah, I'm just wondering, like, I'm not circumcised and how that's going to affect my future, sexualize and, you know, things like that. Like, how do I get that taken care of?
1:06:17🔗
Drew
You go to the urologist and you have a circumcision. Very simple. You'll be out of commission for a couple of weeks. Pretty painful for a couple of days.
1:06:34🔗
Adam
No. Shocking. Yeah. Here's the thing, too. I heard a study. The phone's echoing. I'm going to put them on hold. I heard a study. Drew's going to like this. Drew loves circumcision.
1:06:49🔗
Adam
He's focused on it. Yeah. He has a foreskin hanging from the rear view of his car. Just to remind him, every time he looks in the rear view mirror, it's just what his priorities are. I heard a study where, and Drew's always spouting off these things about how much healthier guys who are circumcised are.
1:07:07🔗
Adam
It's nothing with like penile cancer or something. Because no one gets penile cancer anyway. No.
1:07:19🔗
Drew
No. So what do we care? The partners of uncircumcised men are more likely to get cervical cancer and more likely to get warts.
1:07:28🔗
Adam
Here's the latest thing I heard. Six times more likely to harbor the AIDS virus or to receive the AIDS virus.
1:07:43🔗
Adam
You just brought up the cervical cancer. You didn't talk about the hiv. Now I'm listening. You understand?
1:07:50🔗
Adam
All right, I stop listening. Yeah, it's something, it's really, it's a Petri dish under there for disease. Yes, Drew?
1:08:09🔗
Adam
Don't read them. Let's talk to Peter again. Peter? Yeah. Do you, you don't have a urologist, do you?
1:08:32🔗
Adam
This is tough now. Now I'm torn because on one hand, he's calling from Denver. On the other hand, Dan's dad's a doctor. I can't figure out whether he's Jewish or not. We would have been circumcised. Chinese? Okay. Is your dad going to be angry if he finds out you want to get circumcised?
1:08:52🔗
Caller
I'm not sure. My parents kind of secluded it and they didn't even give me a talk yet or whatever. I turn like 23 or something. My dad's like, son, I need to sit down with you or something.
1:09:05🔗
Drew
Yeah, you're not going to get a talk. He avoids his parents for fear they'll start to talk to him about sex.
1:09:25🔗
Drew
Right, elective. But if there were a stricturing or something, yeah, you'd get it out of an ulceration.
1:09:38🔗
Drew
Even when you're little, yeah. But again, Peter, you look up, your dad must have friends that are urologists. It's just such a common…
1:09:51🔗
Drew
It should be very easy, very easy to find a urologist. But you're going to get 17, you're going to need to do your parental consent anyway. So you might want to bring it up to your dad, just say it's a bit of irritation, it bothers you, it gets dirty or thinky or something.
1:10:05🔗
Adam
You know what a horrible racist I am, Drew? I was like, dad's a doctor, but he's not Jewish, Chinese. Everything snapped into, couldn't be a white guy. I don't know why. It could have been Indian, it could have been Chinese. It had to be another, it had to be a nationality now. I don't know why. A white guy got to be Jewish, right, Drew?
1:10:31🔗
Drew
Yes. Let me, speaking of perpetuating your world, let me once again mention our promotion. May I?
1:10:35🔗
Drew
The Girl Next Door, this is a a promotion we're having where you can come, when did you sell it?
1:10:52🔗
Drew
To star in the movie. So we go to Girl Next Door Tickets. Girl Next Door Tickets at earthling.net. Sign on, you'll get a pass that lets you go to the Arclight on April 7th and see this film for free.
1:11:04🔗
Drew
And it has been a woeful turnout. It will be a hard part of our listeners. We need to get some, show some love here.
1:11:10🔗
Drew
And the rest of you that have gotten or will get on the earth tonight, they're 17 or older, get a free pair of tickets sent to you so you can go see it near you.
1:11:19🔗
Adam
Yeah. Alicia Cuthbert. You just got to say it fast or you're f-ing up. It's coming in.
1:11:33🔗
Adam
Yeah, you say Cuthbert, but it sounds like, it really sounds like you're gay or drunk or you have a cleft palate or something. So, but people just sort of power through it. I think they go, they go Alicia Cuthbert. So if you do it that way, because otherwise your tongue will get stuck.
1:11:50🔗
Adam
Yeah, we'll ask her. We'll ask her. Torrie Wilson, famous, professional, professional wrestler. See, now I'm screwed. Now it's like I went to the dentist. Here tonight, Thursday Night Smackdown, UPN on Cover Playboy. And we'll take a quick break. We'll be right back. Loveline.
1:12:28🔗
Adam
I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, and I'm going to be the host of the show. You did the Marine obstacle course, Drew.
1:12:53🔗
Adam
That's all right. Trained for it. Looked good in a bathing suit, and you, you know, crawl under that barbed wire thing, run through the tires, jump that big 10-foot barrier. You got a little rope hanging down. Yeah, that's tough. I'll tell you the tough part, Drew, is that the pull yourself up stuff. Climb the rope and that kind of stuff. That's a pain in the ass.
1:13:27🔗
Adam
Where you looked in a bathing suit and the time you did. Yeah, there was like a lot of fat chicks that were covered with boils.
1:13:49🔗
Caller
Well, when I was 12, I started cutting on myself, and I've been doing it off and on for about 10 years, and it's gotten pretty serious. It's landed me in the hospital a couple of times for blood loss and that kind of stuff.
1:14:12🔗
Drew
And have you been in treatment from a mental health standpoint? You've been cutting for 10 years? Wait, wait, wait. Yeah, you've been cutting for 10 years to the point that you've had significant blood loss and you're just now getting referred for treatment.
1:14:27🔗
Caller
Yeah, I've just, when I've gone into a hospital, they've always made an excuse on how to touch, tap, and do anything like that.
1:14:44🔗
Adam
Yeah. Yeah, Drusey's a hatchet in your back. He doesn't believe you. He thinks you've been cutting. Hey, Shay, how much blood do you have to lose before somebody brings you to the hospital and then... A lot?
1:15:00🔗
Caller
This last time I almost died, my hermeticut was 11 point something, and my hemoglobin was at 3.9.
1:15:10🔗
Drew
That is... That's a lot? That is not compatible with life. That is not compatible. Oh, really?
1:15:20🔗
Caller
They gave me 4 units and I was still anemic. I was still at about 33 for my hermeticut. They had put a central line in.
1:15:30🔗
Drew
You're a small person then, because it's bringing you up from 3 to 10, basically, in your hemoglobin with 4 units. Usually it's about a gram per unit. No, but what I'm saying is normally it would take 7 units to be able to get a point.
1:15:45🔗
Adam
Hey, Drew, is a unit, you know, hold on. When you give blood, you give a pint, right? I think you give a pint. You don't give a quart. You give a pint. I think you give a pint. Torrie, you give a pint. I have no idea. No, it's not metric. I think you give a pint. All right. What's a unit? Is a unit the amount you would give if you gave blood? It makes sense to me that that's a unit. You know what I'm saying?
1:16:10🔗
Drew
I don't know how that all, to tell you the truth, I don't know. I know that it, I know how it translates in terms of what we're restoring in the body.
1:16:16🔗
Drew
And a unit doesn't look quite like a pint. And it's packed cells. We give packed cells. We don't give whole blood.
1:16:22🔗
Drew
No. You can when you're trying to restore volume and blood. Right. But you're giving the oxygen carrying capacity.
1:16:30🔗
Drew
No. Well, there might be some in there, but usually it's red blood cells. You're just giving red blood cells.
1:16:34🔗
Adam
Yeah, if you think about what a pint is, if you go to the store, well, maybe it's a half pint. It's either pint or less. All right. Okay, Drew, you know nothing. Once you ask me a carpentry question, I'm not going to not know what you're talking about. Yes? No?
1:17:00🔗
Adam
Oh, wait, I want to know something. But when you lost all of this blood, aren't you unconscious at this point?
1:17:14🔗
Caller
Right, because I'm not really suicidal. I don't do this to try to kill myself. It's more of a release from other things.
1:17:21🔗
Drew
Yeah. And that's true of cutting in general. It's almost a drug addiction almost, because it's a way of getting a dissociative experience or breaking a dissociative experience and raising cataclysmic endorphins in the brain. But here's the deal. It's a sign of severe, severe, severe psychiatric distress. And it needs to be treated. And it can be treated. In fact, I'm going to be in a real world episode. I think it's next week when you're going to see some very interesting cutting in the real world house down in San Diego. Believe it or not, it's a heavy, heavy episode.
1:17:53🔗
Drew
No, I did some interstitial stuff in the real world episode where there was some cutting.
1:18:15🔗
Drew
But the point is they'll give some referrals. The fact is, Shay, you're in therapy now. That's where you need to stay. That's where the referrals are. There are tons of websites out there for cutters. There are support groups for trauma survivors. You can look at the 12-step groups. Cutting and addiction go hand in hand very, very commonly. And so if you've got an addiction also, focus on a 12-step treatment. That tends to be very useful in cutting as well.
1:19:00🔗
Torrie Wilson
For a male, you got to have something that kind of sets you apart from the rest. There are so many people trying to get into the WWE right now.
1:19:07🔗
Adam
And what about bringing a chicken like porn? Like, that's how Drew got into porn. He brought a lady. Well, here's what I'm saying. If you and I hooked up…
1:19:17🔗
Drew
And Adam sees everything through the prism of pornography. Okay. So if he wanted to get into porn, he'd have to find a smoking woman to bring in… Nothing to do with it. Just to present to the people.
1:19:28🔗
Adam
If Torrie and I went and said, you know, if I said, hey, listen, I may not be much to look at my underpants, but I got this lady friend right here and we're a team. You know what I mean? You get her, but you got to take me. Might that help?
1:19:53🔗
Adam
Why do you think you're doing a radio show with me? See what I'm saying? You wouldn't be doing this. Right. It would just be me. Right. I said, no, no. I won't do it alone. I won't do it alone. I kept saying, do it alone, do it alone. He's baggage. Right.
1:20:10🔗
Adam
Okay. Andrew? Um. Andrew? First off, this isn't much to build a dream on. I mean, you figure there's probably only a 40 to 50% chance you'll become a professional wrestler. Yeah. I can see, I already, I already know, I already know his wrestling name, Mr. Personality.
1:20:34🔗
Adam
Mr. Excitement. Yeah. Or maybe Hollywood or something. And it's, you know, during the interview, it's, the one guy stands next to him and says, I'm gonna dismantle Mr. Excitement. I'm gonna pull his exciting arms from his exciting sockets. And I'm gonna pull his neck off. And I'm gonna crap into his lungs.
1:21:07🔗
Adam
And it's like, my whole thing would be like, imagine how good a wrestler I am with this rap. You know, my rap is so god-awful that it's like smucker's jelly. It must be good. You know? You know what I'm saying? I gotta be a maniac in the ring because they sure as hell didn't hire me for my out of ring antics.
1:21:29🔗
Adam
He must be a great wrestler. Andra. Let's talk a little smack now. I got Torrie here. What would your wrestling name be?
1:22:05🔗
Adam
Here's the thing. I want to get people in the seats of the Pontiac Silverdome coming up on the 18th of April. Mr. Excitement is going against Torrie in a powder-prof grudge match, okay? All right. Mr. Excitement. Yeah? What are you going to be doing to Torrie on the 18th at the Pontiac Silverdome?
1:22:31🔗
Adam
That's right. Torrie told me before we started broadcasting that you're not a man for her. What do you have to say about that, Mr. Excitement?
1:23:17🔗
Adam
Yeah. Somewhere halfway through the storyline. Thirsting. Thirsting Excitement. And you'll be thirsting for entertainment. Mr. Excitement shows up in the square circle. The Pontiac Silverdome. Come on. I could see. Yeah. Tenon under free. Ringside Seat's still available. Mr. Excitement.
1:23:36🔗
Adam
All right. So, so, uh, Andrew, I mean, Mr. Excitement, what are you doing to make this dream come true for yourself?
1:23:50🔗
Adam
Wrestling. I said win at school. Wait, you're doing more like Olympic style, like collegiate style wrestling, right?
1:24:01🔗
Torrie Wilson
They actually they Vince McMahon is really into the collegiate wrestlers right now.
1:24:22🔗
Adam
Wrestling capital of the world. Andrew, Andrew, you know, I rarely say this. You got a little something called it, my friend. That's that's when God comes down and touches you. And that's not about who your daddy is. That's not nature or nurture. Do you know what I mean? And every once in a while, a guy comes along, a Ben Varin and Al Jolson, a ravishing Rick Rood. You see what I'm saying? Absolutely. Or is it Rick Flair? Somebody named Rick. Rick Rood and Rick Flair. Once in a while. Or I like Ted DiBiase, the million dollar man. He has lots of money, this guy. Once in a while, God comes down and creates an Iron Sheik or Jake the Snake, whatever his last name was. Once in a while. Or the Honky Tonk Man. Once in a blue moon, he comes out. And I think he may have touched Andrew over here and created Mr. Excitement. Okay, buddy, you keep wrestling, you never know.
1:25:32🔗
Adam
You've got to know math, because if I took six Percocet and I got on top of the turnbuckles, am I going to be able to pull off this flying suplex? You see what I'm saying?
1:25:44🔗
Adam
And what angle should I take? And what would be the fastest street to get to the hospital after I get a compound fracture in my tibia? All right, Torrie Wilson is here tonight, we'll take a quick break, we'll be right back.
1:26:18🔗
Adam
I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Phone number, wow. We don't need your calls. We need your pity calls, yes, sir.
1:26:33🔗
Adam
Let me tell you something that's very dangerous. I got this message center. Torrie Wilson is here tonight. She's on Playboy. And I think, she may have just come off the cover, but don't worry. You'll see her out. You go to that SmackDown Thursday night, you be on your finder, giving someone the old pile driver. Here's what happened. Yes, Dexter from the Offspring was in here talking about having a jet and flying. And I wanted to go flying with him. But, you know, half the stuff, you know, when people come on the show and they go, oh yeah, it's cool, no, you gotta come down, no, jam, I didn't hang out, do that. I never wanna do anything, because it involves doing something.
1:27:15🔗
Adam
Right, so, I gave my usual, hey, you got an airplane, and he's like, hey, I'll take you up, and I'm like. No.
1:27:23🔗
Adam
No, I never met it. Please, Drew. Don't give people the impression I meet it. He called a week later and said, hey, let's go. And he just called me at my house. Now, I ironically had just got off a private jet because me and Jimmy and a few other people from Jimmy's show, Jimmy Kimmel's show, Monday through Friday, 1206, ABC. We just got back from the Super Bowl. So I literally just got off a private jet, which was cool and everything, but I just five hours on a private jet and I get home and there's Dexter going, let's go off in the private jet. So it's not quite as exciting as it was because six hours earlier, I was in the air on a jet. And by the way, just 70 mile an hour winds coming into a Van Ize and was vomiting.
1:28:22🔗
Adam
I don't go up in private jets that often. It's just ironic that they both came next to each other. It's like, I love Hungarian food. I just don't want to go out and eat Hungarian the day after I went out and ate it that night. You see what I'm saying? I've probably been on a jet three times in my life, private jet.
1:28:43🔗
Adam
Maybe four times. Here's the point. The point is, it's beautiful. You can lie down, get the lightest thing to carry you, a foot massage. Beautiful. Okay, so I ended up, now here's the problem. I have this message center and you just, when you want to save a call, it's too easy. You don't have to write anything down. You just hit that save button, you hit the number two on your phone.
1:29:06🔗
Adam
Yeah, you want to save this call? And you're like, yeah, I'll just hit number two. Now what happens to me is I have 30 calls because it's so easy. And then they go away. I mean, what it means, you don't think about it. And they just rot over there in message center purgatory. But I did call Dexter back like a couple of weeks later. He was on tour in Europe. So there he was.
1:29:34🔗
Adam
Because the Offspring are playing the Universal Amphitheater out here in like a couple of weeks.
1:29:39🔗
Drew
Yeah, I'm just thinking, what if they're going to some of the summer festivals and maybe we go to one of our affiliates with them.
1:29:44🔗
Adam
They're playing like the, I don't know, the 13th or something. I gotta get tickets for somebody.
1:30:44🔗
Adam
No one's better at receiving oral than me, but I don't rank too high in the giving. So not too into that. Well, here's the thing.
1:30:57🔗
Adam
When one of your friends, possibly yourself, does not like receiving oral sex, does that mean they're a little uptight about themselves or a little... Oh, really?
1:31:19🔗
Adam
Hold on. Now this is confusing, but here's the thing. Dr. Drew does not really appreciate oral sex. I don't want to say he doesn't like it. He doesn't like receiving it that much. Not because it doesn't feel good, because he's a man of such immense passion, such exquisite passion, that oral sex does not satisfy him enough. He's not an appetizer guy. He wants to actually bite into the cow. He's that, he's that virile, that masculine. You understand? So if you two got together and the night is young and you tried to give oral sex to Drew, he would push you away and go for the intercourse because he's exquisitely passionate. Now, if he knew all he was gonna get was oral, he would probably hold still for that. But, he nodded his head, but if he knows that there's more, he immediately goes forward. And as a, now he is thinking as a woman who doesn't much appreciate oral sex, you must be like him, you must be that passionate. But I don't know if it translates for women.
1:32:28🔗
Drew
No, I think there is that, but that's, I think there is more that women that are very responsive during intercourse tend to be the ones that if it's uncomfortable, the direct stimulation of oral sex.
1:33:03🔗
Adam
Exquisitely passionate. And then we couldn't hang. Because I wanna watch TV and receive oral.
1:33:12🔗
Adam
We're back on. She doesn't want it, she don't mind giving it. Perfect. Game on. Drew, I'll have you come in and mop up. You come in, I'll go to the bullpen. You come in, you're the closer, buddy. Tag out. Yeah, tag out. And then you're the closer, tag team. That's a tag out. Drew comes in, cleans up.
1:33:32🔗
Drew
I realize, yeah, it takes a little bit of work, too. And that's not something you're into at all.
1:33:50🔗
Adam
Whatever you do to masturbate, incorporate that into your sexual act. Right. That's gonna help. All right, we'll take a break. We'll be right back.
1:34:42🔗
Adam
Well, that's the show, everybody. I want to thank Torrie Wilson for coming here tonight.
1:34:50🔗
Adam
Sweet breath of fresh air in this otherwise dank studio. Thursday Night UPN, SmackDown, everybody. Go watch your, well.
1:35:02🔗
Adam
And speaking of spanking down, a lot of 14 year olds watching that, getting their smack on as well.
1:35:09🔗
Adam
All right, I want to thank everybody involved with the show. I'm not sure who's still here anymore. Really, I really don't know. Ken did a great job filling in this week. Chris, producer Ann, Junior, Junior, producer Lauren, and then Brian, and then.
1:35:24🔗
Adam
Phone screeners, new phone screeners, doing a wonderful job. So until next time, this Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo.
1:35:34🔗
Caller
This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Annie Gold. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment. Yeah, yeah, yeah.