3:42🔗
Voiceover
Hey, it's the Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Dr. Drew, board-certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. Phone number, 1-800-LOVE-191. All right. Oh, I was at the dentist today. I'll get into that.
4:08🔗
Adam
You can't score? Drew hates it when I use the word score. He likes to replace the word drugs with medication. Undeclared is the cast we have in tonight. Jay Bereshell is here. Carla Gallo and Seth Rogen are all here from Undeclared. Fox, Tuesday nights, 8.30. Big hit.
4:36🔗
Adam
5th. Seems like it's been on longer because they worked the hell out of it like two months before it came out.
4:45🔗
Adam
But it looked, I don't know why, but maybe just because I'm in entertainment, but I always hope when I see trailers and previews that they're lame. Because you want to show is lame or that the trailers lame, therefore the show is going to suck.
5:02🔗
Adam
You do it, you're sitting on your sofa and they go, coming up on NBC this fall. And then you see the trailer and you want to turn desperately the person next to you and go, that sucks. Yeah, that's going to suck. That's going to suck.
5:16🔗
Drew
Is that just envy for the fact that you've never been on a show that's had one second of promotion?
5:21🔗
Adam
Yeah, maybe that's it. I mean, it's just, no, it's just how whenever you do something, you have to say whatever it is sucked. Like when I was a carpenter, whenever there was a movie scene where the guy picked up a hammer, I'm like, he's using a finish hammer for framing. He should be using a waffle and hammer. He's got like a 12-ounce Vaughn. He should be using like a 24-ounce with a hatchet handle.
5:51🔗
Adam
Okay. You watch any show, right? Totally fake. Oh, fake, fake. Never happened. Never happened.
6:01🔗
Adam
What is it? A real funny cat. Yeah. So you just want to say, and I guess if you're on TV or if you do comedy, you have to just hate all other forms of comedy. You're like watching a preview and you go, hey, I don't see me in that. That sucks. But this, the Undeclared, I was watching for, like I said, six or eight weeks before the launch and it was like, that's good.
6:38🔗
Adam
So, and I was just reading here that it's from the same writer from in the producer Freaks and Geeks and Ben Stiller's show and a Larry Sanders show, which are all not only just all amazing shows, but sort of diverse, like sort of three different kinds of shows.
7:08🔗
Guest
Yeah, I do a little of the writing there. They send me in, I got an office and everything. It's crazy.
7:42🔗
Guest
Yeah, originally. And then they were casting, and I read with all the actors who were casting, and I don't know, I was right in there, it seemed like. So they cast me also. So they got me into testing.
7:59🔗
Adam
And what's, and here's what I always say to Drew when it comes to these shows that take place on a college campus. What's wrong with using a college? I mean, that we know of, that exists.
8:12🔗
Guest
University of Northeastern California? You probably have to pay for it. It's all, everything, every question you have, the answer is it costs less that way.
8:19🔗
Drew
You know what, you would think there'd be schools out there that would want you to use their name.
8:26🔗
Adam
Yeah, I mean, you probably wouldn't want to be at every school that would want you, and it's probably a catch-22 if they want you, you don't want them.
8:38🔗
Adam
But there's got to be a handful that are sort of on the fence where you could say to them, listen, why should we pay you? This is an advertisement. You know those things you run during the halftime of the football games and stuff where, you know, tradition of excellence for 27 years and two people nominated for Nobel Prizes and all that crap. This is it. We're wearing the sweatshirts. We're moving merchandise. We'll up enrollment next semester. I don't understand that and my guess is is that you may be doing things on the show that the university probably would not want to represent it.
9:22🔗
Adam
No, not at real college. No. No, most of them are dry campuses, which just means Coke, right? I heard that. Is that true?
9:33🔗
No, I drink alcohol.
9:34🔗
Adam
I'm sorry. All right. So Undeclared, what about tomorrow night's episode? Any analyzing tidbits? Oh, Adam Sandler.
10:00🔗
Adam
Then later on after the show, we'll go out and have some beers and I'll tell you why I'm funnier now. That's like eight beers away. I look forward to it. He doesn't do too many TV shows.
10:11🔗
Guest
No. He's good friends with Judd. Judd's worked on a lot of his movies and stuff like that. They were roommates.
10:17🔗
They did stand up together.
10:30🔗
Guest
He performs at our school and hangs out with us one night in our dorm after the show. And it all goes to hell.
10:36🔗
Adam
Oh, so he is like doing a college tour and he does a whole performing scene and then hangs out.
10:46🔗
Adam
Beautiful. Well, that'd be cool. Tomorrow night, 830 on Fox. That's right. Yeah, what was I? Oh, yeah, I was at the Orthodontist today.
10:54🔗
Later.
10:59🔗
Oh.
11:05🔗
Adam
I've successfully now, yes. I'm well under 40 and I'm receiving a bridge in the next few weeks. So you know you've arrived.
11:13🔗
Adam
No, it's in the back. It's when I bring up the cut for the third time kind of thing. That's the only time I use those. So I told him, let's get rid of it. He was like the orthodontist was, he hung his head because- Orthodontist. Well, I mean the-
11:37🔗
Adam
Peridontist, right. The peridontist, he hung his head in shame and he said, I failed, essentially, we're gonna have to take this tooth out. And I said, listen doc, to you, it's a failure. But to me, this tooth, picture a really, really horrible kid that's been living in your house, well into his 30s and I'm the stepdad. I want this puke out. I wish this son of a bitch got out five years ago. Do you hear me? No love loss here. There's been nothing but a pain in my ass for the last five years. Let's get him out of here.
12:25🔗
Adam
It's a permanent thing. That's what I told him. I told him the bridge has a real negative connotation. I pictured myself before performing Oral on a hooker. I say, hold on. Hey, you're cute. Are you Asian? Putting it like floating it in a beer on the nightstand. All right. So now it's permanent. It stays in there.
12:48🔗
All right.
12:50🔗
Good times.
12:53🔗
Hi.
12:58🔗
We used KY the other night.
13:27🔗
Yeah, it wasn't the tube, it was the bottle.
13:32🔗
Okay, I mean like I've used KY before with him, but with other partners that I've had, I've never used it before.
13:51🔗
Adam
Their callers are retarded, Drew. You know what they do? They like to really drive home the obvious to confuse you to think, oh, she's making some point here. She's not saying anything.
14:26🔗
Drew
I know, but now you've had something different happen. It's like going to the doctor two weeks before you get a cold. And they go, I was just the doctor. No, you just try something over the counter like gonolotrimin, that kind of thing, see if that works.
14:37🔗
Yes, see, I tried that and I don't know if I'm really sensitive or what, but it seems like that hurts.
14:45🔗
Adam
Let me float a point here. He, you use the KY, that then frees him up a little, he really bangs the bejesus out of you, and you get a yeast infection because of the vigorous sex.
15:03🔗
Adam
Right. Then you equate it to the KY, when indirectly it's because the KY freed him up to do his best work.
15:14🔗
I'm like, what did you do?
15:16🔗
Did you use the wrong bottle or something?
15:20🔗
And I made him turn the light on and show me what he put on.
15:40🔗
I have.
15:41🔗
Well, you see, this was just on Sunday that it happened, and so I did it today.
15:49🔗
Okay.
16:03🔗
Adam
Yeah. All I'm saying is, I don't know what's up with pen gay, but they're going to have to remark it or do something because there's a lot of pen gay humor going around when I was like in junior high and high school, and I don't hear that much of it anymore.
16:16🔗
Drew
We have those little ponds in our backyard, and there's a bunch of dead leaves and stuff like that. If I lived in the 70s, I'd get some acid. Dump it. Dump it and burn it all out because acid destroys everything, right?
16:31🔗
Adam
Drew and I sit around and try to think of things we don't see on TV anymore, and one of them is spilling the acid and having it burn through every back of the ship.
16:44🔗
Adam
Oh, the guy stirring the drink with the spoon and then just pulling the nub of the spoon.
16:56🔗
Adam.
16:59🔗
Hey, champ. Hey, good times. Hey, it's Dr. Drew.
17:04🔗
Thanks for taking my call. I have two quick questions, but first, Undeclared, that's a great show.
17:12🔗
The show with Will Ferrell on there as a guest actor, that was a great show.
17:21🔗
Whenever I have to use the restroom, number one, I get an erection most of the time.
17:31🔗
Just in general.
17:33🔗
Drew
There's a spinal reflex that when the bladder is stretched it can cause that. Usually you have to get pretty full bladder before it starts up, so why don't you start peeing more frequently?
17:42🔗
I do. I tend to drink a lot of water, but so I guess that's just an effect of drinking extra water.
17:51🔗
Adam
Yeah. What could be bad, especially with the prying eyes in the men's room, where they don't have those divisions between the urinals. What's wrong with impressing the boys? They love stuff like that.
18:03🔗
I have to wear jeans all the time because I can't wear slacks.
18:07🔗
Adam
Okay. Hold on. I can't write fast enough. If you drink a lot of water, it makes you pee more or less, would you say? More slacks.
18:15🔗
Can I ask a second question, please?
18:18🔗
Sorry. I go to a four-year university. I don't go to a two-year junior college or anything. I'd really like to see Dr. Drew speak at my university one time, but whenever I listen to your show, it appears that Dr. Drew likes to go to the snub-nosed school such as Carleton College and Lord Fauntleroy School for Hemophiliacs.
18:44🔗
Virginia.
18:45🔗
Where? George Mason University.
18:56🔗
Adam
Listen, Drew would speak at the College for Hitler Youth if they paid him eight grand. He'll go wherever the money is. Pony up. He'll be there.
19:05🔗
That's where I think the problem is that, like, I listen to the show and I hear the Dr. Drew boogie and the Dr. Drew shuffle. And so I know Dr. Drew has some soul with him. And I'm just wondering, Dr. Drew, do you like to rap?
19:21🔗
Wrap your lips around these nuts.
19:25🔗
That was the most interesting segue I've ever heard. I really love your show and when I pee, I get an erection.
19:35🔗
Adam
It's actually a good time coming, now we're getting into the holidays, you can also use that for wrapping gifts, you know? Like, you probably work that in that way, too. Troy, I say this about once every tenth guy caller, Troy's one of those guys, he's the reason why women hate guys.
19:55🔗
Adam
Right. Yeah, he's the reason why I can't argue with them when they say guys are dicks. Amy?
20:00🔗
Yeah.
20:03🔗
Caller
Well, my husband and I have been seeing a counselor and I really think that, I mean, like the whole reason for seeing a counselor is to, like, spend time together, talk out your problems and that kind of stuff. I'm thinking that 180 bucks a week might be better spent if we just, like, went to dinner. Or how about, like, I'd be in a much better mood if I, like, bought a pair of pants with the money instead of going to see a doctor.
20:30🔗
Adam
Is that 100? Buying pants. By the way, man, it means you're very shallow when buying pants would do more for your psyche than seeing a therapist.
20:40🔗
Caller
I get two kids and the money's kind of tight. And so, like, I think, I'm thinking, like, he's just another reason to argue.
20:50🔗
Drew
This is what this is, Amy. This is you not wanting to do the work. This is you resisting whatever's going on in the sessions. And I don't know what it is that's causing you to deflect everything on to everyone else, but you've got to get in there and start looking at what role you play in whatever the conflict is you're having with your husband. And the role of the therapist is to create a safe instruction environment, keep that dialogue focused. You are not willing to work. If you're not willing to work, don't go. You are wasting your money then, but you're looking for every reason to get out of there.
21:45🔗
Drew
Amy, Amy, no, Amy, what you're interested in doing is maintaining the status quo. You don't want this equilibrium disturbed. You must have had a dad that fought with your mom all the time and that's the state you want your marriage to be in. It's just going outside of the boundaries of what your comfort zone is because there's dysfunction here.
22:01🔗
Adam
Drew, maybe your parents fought a lot and that's why you're projecting that on Amy's parents.
22:06🔗
Caller
Well, let me say that certainly that was the case and I'm the one that brought up going to therapy.
22:15🔗
Drew
Wait, just a second. Just let me finish. But Amy, you never assumed that you'd have to look at yourself. That wasn't part of the bargain. The fact is, you do, and it's going to be painful, and you're part of the problem here. And you can't just restore a homeostasis that's sick. You have to try to get well.
22:33🔗
Adam
Okay. Hey, Amy. It's interesting because we never hear women complaining that they don't want to go into the couples there. I see it all the time. Shut Drew's mic off. He's crapping on one of my toys.
22:56🔗
Adam
Well, just quiet down. So you got him going. Now how long have you been going to the therapist with him?
23:02🔗
Adam
Two times? When she said, well, initially, I thought she was going to say it was the 80s, everyone was doing it. This was last Tuesday.
23:12🔗
Adam
Okay. Two times. So he was acting. What was he doing that you wanted to take him to the therapist for?
23:18🔗
Caller
Okay. Well, I didn't want to waste your time, but certainly, like we do argue a lot. Sure, I give you that. And certainly I try to like bite my tongue and certainly not everybody can be right all the time.
23:33🔗
Caller
No, but because he, well, this is the, I don't know how to say the blunt, I guess I should say, he went to a class reunion and kind of like made out with someone at a class reunion.
23:51🔗
Caller
And so I was like really pissed and he said, it's nothing, no big deal. Wasn't anything really regretful, blah, blah, blah.
24:11🔗
Adam
All right. So here's the deal. So you drag him to the shrink now because you want to make your relationship better just because you want to punish him in front of a guy who has suede patches on his blazer.
24:24🔗
Adam
Right. So now this sucks. Let's punish him at dinner. Right. So Amy, you got a lot of anger in you. That's never a good thing for a relationship. I think you ought to continue with this. Just give it a couple of months and don't keep dragging your feet.
24:37🔗
Drew
His cheating is assigned to something very long in the relationship and that needs to be dealt with. Forget about it.
24:43🔗
Yeah.
24:52🔗
What the?
24:52🔗
Adam
I would have that chick killed if she emailed me after I made out with her in a reunion. It was great making out with her.
25:01🔗
Adam
I gotta ask, what the hell is that saying? Thanks for the hickey with about 18 years overdue. Wait a minute, Amy, what did that email say?
25:10🔗
Caller
Well, it was basically like, it was so nice to see you again, and I hope you don't think less of me for what happened. And so I emailed her back and I was like, how dumb are you?
25:33🔗
Caller
Well, no, because I thought, well, what could it be? And then I'm thinking, wait, what woman rights a man to say this? Like she's obviously fishing.
25:48🔗
Caller
Well, he said, you know, it's nothing. It was no big deal. It was something I regret. He didn't want to fess up. And I was like, just spill.
26:12🔗
Caller
Yeah, that's what that's what he said. They were really drunk in a bar in front of everyone. And they were just kissing.
26:17🔗
Adam
Oh, interesting angle. The made a ass of ourselves in front of a group so that I could not get a BJ. Interesting. I'm going to try to use that one. A bunch of people there humiliated.
26:28🔗
Caller
You know, the thing was though, like if a girl did that to a guy, they would not have it. You know, it would show me my way, the highway. I'd be out of there.
26:38🔗
Adam
That's an angry. You guys live eight years longer. So that's this. I mean, come on. You got to take some bad. Look, Amy, you're the world's angriest mother. And you're going to. Yes. Yes. And you're going to freak your kids out. They're going to grow up around this really angry mom. So stay with the shrink and forget about the pants.
27:09🔗
Adam
He partied on his crank is what grew. Drew just slipped me a note that said that. The cast of Undeclared is here tonight. Oh, yeah. We made out. All right. Well, let's not give her any more. It could have happened if it was in the bar. Whatever. We're going to take ourselves a little break and we'll be right back.
27:32🔗
Love Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. We'll be right back.
28:02🔗
Adam
Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Tori Amos, our good and spacey friend. Tori Amos will be coming up. Haven't seen her in a little while.
28:17🔗
Adam
Yeah. But always an interesting show. So she'll be in here on Tuesday or Wednesday or whenever the hell that is. Jay Baruchel is here, Seth Rogen, and Carla Gallo. All the cast from or at least a good good portion of the cast from Undeclared, which is Fox's new runaway hit, smash success hit.
28:39🔗
Adam
Tomorrow night, 830 on Fox Tuesday night and Adam Sandler. Sandler. A little brain freeze there. Almost spit out my last name. And Adam Sandler is going to guest star tomorrow night. You know, that's what we need to get this country out of its funk is some good novelty song, you know?
29:05🔗
Adam
Like a good Ben Lahn. Yeah. Like I remember Weird Al. Weird Al had Ayatollah instead of my Sharona.
29:18🔗
Guest
It was a crowning moment in my life. Yeah. He introduced himself as just Al, which I thought was interesting.
29:40🔗
Adam
No, we got the cramp kicked out of us by a bunch of white guys, by the way. It's always humiliating. We got the brothers on the team and I sucked it up pretty good. But it's weird when you got a guy with the name like Ice Cube because he's got the ball and you're like, Hey, Ice, Mr. Cube. So you just lay back and wait to see what other people call him, and then you just call him that too. Except for these guys have known him for 10 years and they're in his posse and stuff, so you feel stupid calling him Ice when you just met him, but you don't know what to call him.
30:26🔗
So what did you call him?
30:28🔗
Adam
I just, it was just, Yo. Yo. Yeah, there's a response to that. Yes, that's black for dude. So if it's a white dude, it's dude.
30:43🔗
Adam
Yeah, like if you got a white guy, it's like 20 feet away and he's got a ball and you want it, it's dude. But if it's a black guy, it's yo.
30:52🔗
It's a distinction.
31:15🔗
Yeah.
31:17🔗
Caller
Yeah. I was just wondering if I masturbate a lot and I was just kind of wondering if that's normal.
31:37🔗
Yeah.
31:40🔗
Adam
Well, why wouldn't he? I mean, he was just speeding off. He's trying to get to class with his pants around his ankles and he gets tripped up and falls down.
32:03🔗
Adam
Not a shower guy. Okay. Yeah. Okay. So one before and then the rest is after school or do you have lunch or?
32:32🔗
Adam
Bunch of hippies sitting around on bean bag chairs calling the teachers by their first name. Walking in, Jay's beating off. Don't stop him. You'll discourage him. You can't discourage. You can't discourage creativity.
32:54🔗
And I just looked over my shoulder a lot.
33:07🔗
Adam
That's great. See, that's why. Drew, how many times have I said you have to learn to beat off standing up so that you can get them in on airplanes, at schools, synagogues, churches?
33:24🔗
Adam
Thank you. Anthony? Yeah. All right. So I'm sorry. So one before school. Yeah. And then the other six to eight after school? OK.
33:40🔗
Drew
And here's the question. Aside from are you able to function, were you sexually abused in some way?
34:03🔗
Where's my bourbon?
34:13🔗
Adam
You see what I'm saying? All right, Anthony. You sound depressed. Are you depressed? Not really. OK.
34:21🔗
I'm a little nervous about calling the show.
34:27🔗
Adam
OK. But here's what I worry about when you do it that many times is you lose your edge. You have no reason to go out and compete in the world.
34:37🔗
Adam
No chi. It takes a little. You have to burn a few calories to get a woman. And just like I was explaining last night when I was on the Internet, I said I was going to order that DVD porn and then I beat off and then I didn't order it. Wow. That's a good strategy. No, no. It's a bad strategy because now I want it. Oh, now you want it again. But I wouldn't do it. I lost my motivation. I lost my edge. That's my edge over the competition.
35:08🔗
Adam
I was thinking about this the other day. How many billions of dollars could be saved a year if guys would just beat off immediately? And here's what I'm saying. Well, think about what it does. It gets you to the strip club. It sits you in the strip club for five hours. You drop a bunch of money. Then you go buy a bunch of drinks. Or like you go out and you rent this or you get on the computer. You sit on the computer, you get on the phone sex chat line at 10 bucks every five minutes. If the second, like if everyone just said, instead of going to the club, instead of going to the massage parlor, instead of getting on the internet, I'm just going to beat off right now. There'll be billions of dollars saved nationally every year.
35:56🔗
Drew
Just to get people, you'd encourage them to testimonials. I did it now and I feel great.
36:01🔗
Adam
I'm freed up. Infomercials about beat for life or what would it be? Hi, I'm Ed McMahon. Where's the money coming in though?
36:18🔗
Drew
The money is people going back to work and being productive as opposed to spending all that time on the computer and porn shots.
36:23🔗
Adam
Let's check the chode board. Hi, I'm Adam Corolla. You know, I kid a lot on the radio and on television, but cornholing. No laughing man. That's how I could start the show. Shara?
36:50🔗
Caller
Um, on Friday afternoon, I found out that I had vaginal E coli, and I don't know how I got it.
37:12🔗
Drew
No, it comes from your rectum, and that's right next door there. And so, people, women get that bacteria in there sometimes.
37:32🔗
Drew
That's good. MetroGel sometimes will work. Sometimes you have to take some antibiotics by mouth, too, for this.
38:35🔗
Drew
No, it can cause awful infections in all kinds of places, but it's a typical bacteria for urinary tract infections, nasal infections.
38:44🔗
That's a good time.
38:45🔗
Adam
Undeclared is the cast we have in tonight, Tuesday nights, 8.30 on Fox. Adam Sandler starring or guest starring tomorrow night. We will take ourselves a little break and we'll be right back.
38:59🔗
Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back on Loveline.
39:50🔗
Adam
Yeah, he's playing with Ice-T and Cube. Hey, Ice, no, not that Ice. You, Cube, Cube, keep driving.
40:06🔗
Adam
You have to be at least on basic cable to make it into this league. Jay Bershell, Seth Rogen and Carla Gallo are all here tonight from Undeclared. Big smash hit on Fox, Tuesday Nights, 8.30. Adam Sandler on tomorrow night. So, went to the dentist today to get the oral surgery and immediately requested the nitrous.
40:34🔗
Guest
Oh, I wish your ads on the radio for some place, it will dope you up for nothing. It's like they advertise it, it will dope you up for nothing.
40:41🔗
Adam
Well, I said, they get these arguments with you there. You go, hey, could I have some nitrous? And they go, you don't need nitrous. And I go, yeah, but I like nitrous. And they go, yep, you know, we and then they try to do this to you, which I think is really dirty pool. We have kids, we have mothers in here, they don't take nitrous. I'm like, look, what is this? Some kind of god damn past that? Look, I want nitrous. I said to the guy, I said, look, I've crawled under houses and dug footings with a coffee can, and I've had the crap beat out of me in a boxing ring many times. The question is not what I can take.
41:16🔗
Adam
If we were in a prison camp and we had no Novacaine and no anesthetic, and you had to do it with some pliers, I could take it.
41:31🔗
Adam
Even if I like it 1% better with the nitrous, isn't it worth it? Why do I got to get the pussy dance? Because I want the nitrous. Drew, what is this? You can do it. You can do it. Of course I can do it. Give me the nitrous, brother.
41:50🔗
Drew
It is. First off, you freaked out last time, by the way. You already had one negative experience.
41:57🔗
Adam
I started hearing that going, here's what the problem. Quite frankly, here was the problem.
42:06🔗
Adam
Yeah. Here's what happened. I had a bad trip. I had a surreal trip. I went in and the guy had a thing of CDs because he said, here's some headphones and a CD. This will relax you. I said, fine. I started looking around. I had all this crap. I said, I need something to relax me. I need some classical or some jazz or something. There was Manhattan Transfer. I said, okay, this is a nice jazz group. I'll put this in. I'm not a big Manhattan Transfer fan, but I know what they do and I'll put in some jazz and I'll relax. I'm lying there and it's like the middle of July and the air conditioning is on the fritz, and it's really hot and I'm sweating my ass off and I'm listening to Manhattan Transfer except for it's the Manhattan Transfer Christmas album.
42:52🔗
Adam
And now I got the nitrous pumping through me and I'm hearing like chestnuts roasting on an open fire and it's hotter than hell in the place since the middle of July and this guy's digging away at my root canal and I had a bad trip. That's all.
43:09🔗
Adam
I was echoing and stuff. I didn't jump up and rip stuff out of the jersey pants or anything. You tried to. How dare you?
43:16🔗
You pansy.
43:17🔗
Adam
It was just weird. So this time, he didn't have the nitrous and he didn't have any either. By the way, how do you not have nitrous when you do that for a living? Can't just keep a tank in the closet?
43:27🔗
Absolutely.
43:30🔗
Adam
I told him I wanted it pumped right into the waiting room. I can loosen me up before I head in. Wouldn't it be nice just to work just a little of that in there just to lighten the mood?
43:45🔗
Adam
Never had it either. What it does is if they give you too much, you'll go out. But if they give you the right amount-
43:52🔗
Adam
You'll hover just around that sort of twilight of not in but not out. Have you ever been put under?
44:04🔗
Adam
When they put you out, nitrous is like when you're coming back and you hear people talking, but you go, I'm not going to respond yet. I'm not ready.
44:24🔗
Caller
I'm on my period and my boyfriend won't have sex with me. He says that I can get pregnant now more so than I can afterwards.
44:40🔗
It's more like a good mess.
45:04🔗
Drew
It sits up there for three days. It can come down over the course of three days, and then the sloughing could have stopped, and it can attach.
45:12🔗
Adam
All right. But listen, you're probably not going to get pregnant. He knows this. He's just working an angle.
45:30🔗
Caller
Yeah, exactly. He's like, I just don't want it, and I'm like, okay. Well, and then he pulled out that crap about that, and I know that's not true.
45:37🔗
Adam
Okay, but you're really busting the guy's chops. I mean, you can understand this, right?
45:57🔗
Adam
No, but this, thank you, Drew. But wait a minute. This crosses the line for the guy. This goes against his sensibilities.
46:06🔗
Drew
It's how it crosses the line for women too though. That's something that they don't feel comfortable with, but you just tell them this.
46:23🔗
Adam
Idiot. Morris T. Blood. Jessica? Yeah. Is your- Listen, here's what I want to ask you. Do you feel like you need to make a point with this guy? No. I mean, does he need to prove it just a little bit?
46:48🔗
Adam
And you would really truly be angry or upset with him, or you wouldn't understand it if he didn't want to do this during this time of the month?
47:52🔗
Adam
But you would understand if she didn't give you a BJ that night with a stream of blood coming out of your penis.
47:59🔗
Caller
What if you're bleeding, like you have a cut, and you're like, oh my God, help me. And she's like, ew, your blood.
48:06🔗
Caller
Because I do have something that's kind of related to that. What? Okay, I have a piercing and ampling, which is at the head of the penis, as I'm sure Drew knows. Oh dear God.
48:13🔗
Caller
And every once in a while, when we're really going at it, and you know how sometimes you kind of pop out and then get going back in before you see where it goes.
48:25🔗
Caller
Well, every once in a while, no, no, I'll just notice like a trace of blood in my semen. Now is that from the piercing kind of moving around in the inside or?
48:37🔗
Adam
Oh, for Christ's sake. Listen, you got some kind of, I pictured just an apartment filled with hepatitis and fecal matter. That's what I, there's no kids around there, are there?
49:01🔗
Drew
It's not the amp-lang. It's probably, it's somehow to be checked out. It's probably not.
49:06🔗
Adam
Here's the deal. You've got a chick who's built for speed, and that means once in a while, you get burned. You know what I mean? You got to put out during these periods. You get the butt love, you get the piercings, you get the crazy sex, you might get a little threesome coming up and a little bi thing, you might get to film something. But now it's time to pay the fiddler.
49:25🔗
Guest
I feel like if I was willing to stick a metal rod through it, I'd be willing to stick it anywhere.
49:29🔗
Adam
Yeah, that's a good, very good point. So I'm coming around, and I'm saying that he should now have sex with her in her period. All right, but she'd probably be offended by that. We'll take a break. Here it is, Bottom Line, it sucks being single today.
49:43🔗
Tons of lame people and no decent prospects.
49:46🔗
Call the Dateline. Call the Dateline.
49:48🔗
1-877-889-DATE. Loveline will be right back. So get your problems ready, ready, ready, ready.
50:34🔗
Adam
Hey, everybody. Loveline. I'm Adam. I like that song. What band is that? Oh, that's Pennywise, huh? I like that song. Uh, it's Loveline. Fletcher puked on Drew. That's why he's playing that. Undeclared is the show we're talking about. Tuesday nights, 8.30 on Fox. Adam Sandler on tomorrow night's episode. J.Seth and Carla are all here from the show. Dr. Drew over there, phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Tori Amos coming in here on Wednesday, Tuesday. Uh, Aisha Tyler. Who is that?
51:35🔗
Adam
You know, though, here's the sad reality. For guys, doesn't help them at all. I mean, doesn't help their stock at all.
51:45🔗
Adam
No, no, no, no, no, no, for a guy can work it. Now, here's what I'm saying. If we're talking about our attraction to a woman, if she's really hot, that's enough. If she's hot and has a great sense of humor, she's still just hot.
52:04🔗
Oh crap.
52:05🔗
Adam
Funnier than I am. That's the only thing I had on. Yeah, it doesn't, it doesn't. You could take like a guy who wasn't very attractive, but he had a great sense of humor, and all of a sudden he was an 8 or a 9. A chick who looked like an 8 or a 9 and a great sense of humor, still an 8 or a 9.
52:26🔗
Adam
Right. I know you're cracking any penis jokes when I'm trying to get a BJ. Yeah, that's right.
52:37🔗
David?
52:38🔗
Hey guys, love the show.
52:42🔗
Caller
I've got a fetish. I'd like to try to hook up with a woman who's lactating. I was wondering if there's any risk of HIV transmission or any other type of STD from that.
52:55🔗
Drew
My understanding is that HIV is not in breast milk, but that certainly is not completely risk-free, I don't believe. I don't believe hepatitis C can be transmitted that way. B could be. That's about it. What else?
53:09🔗
Adam
Now, do they, do you have to, can you get like a wet nurse? Or where do you find these lactating women? I mean, do they have to be pregnant or a year or so after preying this? How does this work? There's a window, I mean, is what I'm saying.
54:08🔗
Adam
Hey, David. Yes. You know, they got those magazines and movies and stuff, right? Oh, yeah.
54:20🔗
Adam
Okay. And so, Drew, tell me about it. So, the chances of him finding just a regular chick who's not pregnant or who didn't just give birth recently.
54:36🔗
Drew
I mean, there are women on medication that will lactate. Certain medication, particularly antipsychotic medication will cause lactation. Perfect.
54:55🔗
Adam
Yeah. It would be easier. Can't just get into feet or something. A hoe to row. You know, it's going to be a long life for you. I mean, a long and uncomfortable life.
55:13🔗
Caller
Well, just the normal, straight type of activities, but just something I've always wanted to try.
55:39🔗
Caller
It's just something I've never heard about as far as the risk of transmission. You always talk about safe sex and condoms.
55:51🔗
Adam
No. Let's just go with no. But if you got your girlfriend pregnant, Drew, or your wife pregnant, how long would it take before she would lactate? At what stage? At what point?
56:23🔗
Adam
Right. No, anyway, it goes to one of these states that has the second trimester abortions. He gets a good three months of milk.
56:34🔗
Adam
See, the two hens are laying. Jesus Christ. Wait a minute. I got the partridge in the paratrine. That song is it just sounds like a bad mushroom trip or something. Partridge is in the paratrine. The milk maids are milking and the hens are laying. And the ducks swinging.
56:59🔗
Adam
Drew, what is that? The geese are laying. The geese are laying. The milk and maids. Five golden rings. Five golden rings.
57:21🔗
Adam
There's something to do with turtle doves. We're going to work this up. It's a turtle dove.
57:31🔗
Yeah?
57:46🔗
Six months.
57:55🔗
Caller
Like, she's been following me around the school analyzing my stuff, coming over to my house, like every other hour sometimes.
58:07🔗
Drew
I think that's real stalking. I think you don't know what she's capable of. There's something called psychotic stalking where people will really lose it and do scary and dangerous things. And it's time that you at least give her the opportunity to get some help if not protect yourself. You've got to tell someone this is not right, Brian.
58:26🔗
Adam
I got this song in my hand. I'm trying to figure out about the coming birds and I know it doesn't work. Calling Birds. Well, that's what I said. I did say Calling Birds. At some point. Don't make us play the tape. Anderson, back me up with the Calling Birds. Okay. Hey, Brian?
59:26🔗
Drew
Her parents, your parents, someone at school you trust, someone you trust, an adult to take care of this.
59:37🔗
Adam
All right. I just don't like calling the cops for everything. I hate that plan. I just think people use the cops like police.
59:57🔗
Yeah.
59:58🔗
Adam
Because eventually they'll turn into law enforcement personnel and then it's over. Jeremy?
1:00:15🔗
Go ahead.
1:00:17🔗
Is this Adam?
1:00:22🔗
I got a couple of buddies here.
1:01:48🔗
Got another question, Wendell?
1:01:50🔗
Hurry up. Hurry up.
1:01:53🔗
Push, push, push, you nasty thing.
1:01:57🔗
Adam
That was during the commercial when producer A&S, they wanted more coffee. You should have heard them cranked up when they were on the air. Wow.
1:02:21🔗
Yeah.
1:02:25🔗
Guest
My girlfriend keeps asking me to have sex and I try but I can't get in the erection and I have no problem in getting an erection when she gives me oral sex or when she touches me and I've been told it's because I get high or whatever.
1:03:04🔗
Guest
It's not. I've been told it was because of that and because I've never had sex before.
1:03:11🔗
Drew
Well that will do that. You get a little freaked out and you can have performance anxiety. Yeah, sure that can happen.
1:03:23🔗
Adam
Well, that's pretty good. I mean, you're, you know, you're head of the curve for most 15-year-olds. You're doing all right. And the hand gets you going too, right?
1:03:43🔗
Adam
And it doesn't, it stops work? I mean, what if she gave you some oral sex, got you going, and then you did it?
1:03:58🔗
Adam
How long is that period in between? Because I've gotten it shaved down to just a couple heartbeats from like a pigeon, you know, from the oral to the part where I'm in?
1:04:09🔗
Adam
Yeah. What's going on? It's not a lot of downtime there. It can literally be just a couple of seconds.
1:04:15🔗
Guest
Well, we have to change positions. And she has to take off her clothes and all of this.
1:04:22🔗
Adam
Uh-huh. Maybe you want to start planning with her, you know, getting out of the jumpsuit and long johns.
1:04:33🔗
Adam
Ever take the knee-high boots off and the stockings and leggings and all that before the BJ? And then, well, see, because once you get it in and it's erect, it comes right back to life. It's like Superman getting into like a lead vault, you know, when a kryptonite's draining, it's amping its strength. Once you get in, you immediately get your powers out.
1:05:08🔗
Guest
All right. She told me that she was on birth control, but she also told other people that she was lying. And she got very upset when she asked me if we were to have sex, if we were going to use a condom. And I said yes.
1:05:24🔗
Drew
She told him she was using birth control pills. She told other people she wasn't. She became angry when he said he wanted to use a condom. And she... What does that mean?
1:05:55🔗
Adam
Smarter than you. Yes, it knows. It knows like a dog knows. My penis knows when there's going to be an earthquake. It hides up my ass. I did. I woke up with my penis up my ass. I didn't know what it was doing there. I found out we had a tremor that night.
1:06:22🔗
Adam
Yeah, you're right. The penis finds water and the balls act strange during the earthquake.
1:06:33🔗
Adam
All right. So do we help him other than to say, do not get her pregnant. And maybe it's good that your penis is not functioning, but.
1:06:54🔗
Guest
And then, you know, but that's and then so like when he's when he's ready, then they stick it in. It's already right.
1:06:59🔗
Adam
Now, here's what I was thinking, though. I thought that suggestion is good, but he's not using it for protection. He's using it for speed. So what if she could get her head up under the condom? Oral like some some kind of bad Howie Mandel's bit. There's no bad. Yeah, exactly. I know. No, you're right. Howie is a genius.
1:07:22🔗
Adam
But touche. But this one would be a bad one if he actually slid the condom over his head and stuffed the penis up in there too.
1:07:42🔗
Adam
Howie, we're going to breathe some life in it. Yes, this is not the 80s anymore. You need a dick shoved up into that condom that's on your head.
1:07:58🔗
Caller
Well, I hear you guys talk a lot about how it's totally abnormal for women to lactate if they've never been pregnant.
1:08:14🔗
Caller
But I hear you, Dr. Drew, say frequently that it's something that you haven't heard of typically, that typically you would have to be caused by some other factor.
1:08:24🔗
Drew
No, I didn't say that. I said you want to have it evaluated if you have that. You want to get your thyroid checked. You want to get your prolactin levels checked. The medication causes. There's a lot. It is a medical problem when you have that. And once that's all been ruled out, then it's whatever it is. It's just maybe just irritation in the nipple.
1:09:13🔗
Adam
Well, wait a second, Joe, just to finish, because we get this a lot. First, you know, you're a freak, right? So we can't account for that, is what I'm saying.
1:09:31🔗
Adam
No, he was doing that to make you feel good, so you'd pay and just get the hell out of there. It's not one in ten. No, I mean, how much lactation do you do?
1:09:46🔗
Adam
All right, still, one in ten women who are not pregnant, who have no tumors or thyroid problems or are on some kind of medication, I don't think it's one in ten of those women.
1:10:08🔗
Adam
So she did the math. All right. All right, Joe, but anyway, we don't... What Drew is saying, what we do on the show frequently is we don't cover every base. We say most women do not do this, and that is still true. But as I was saying, there are magazines dedicated to this, and Drew was saying if there's enough stimulation, and that just happens to be you. So what is your next question?
1:10:33🔗
Caller
My next question is just when people call up and they have been sexually molested or whatever, how come you guys don't push that they go after their attacker more?
1:10:48🔗
Caller
No, to actually prosecute them or try and take it to some limit where they get to feel some kind of, I don't know, success about it. I mean, I haven't been sexually molested, but I was a teacher that had a lot of children there that were, and it's like, it just seems that it would empower them so much to be able to do something about it.
1:11:08🔗
Drew
You know why, Jo? Yeah, you know why? It doesn't. If it did, we would. If it doesn't, it doesn't really do anything to them in terms of their recovery.
1:11:34🔗
Adam
Well, most of the people we talk to who were molested, these are situations that happen like 15 or 20 years ago sometimes.
1:11:43🔗
Adam
Really crazy long times ago. You can't prove it. They say, it was my grandfather and he's dead, or he did get prosecuted, or my uncle shot him or something.
1:11:59🔗
Caller
If they go back and they say, hey you jerk, you did this to me, well not that kind of confronting, and I think they get confused with that, but if there were some steps anywhere where they could say these are the choices that you do have, if you want to take legal process against them, then I feel like that could empower them.
1:12:18🔗
Drew
Because it doesn't. It doesn't do anything for them in terms of their recovery. And people who run recovery, you know, survivor recovery programs, that's not the focus of the treatment at all. Because it doesn't do much for them. Their brain has been configured as a result of this, and that needs to be reprocessed. And it's not about prosecuting, and it's not about vengeance. It's not about any of that.
1:12:42🔗
Adam
Essentially. And I always make that point. But it's just usually so distant, so far away. The person's dead half the time. It's just that if anything happens where someone is sexually abused or raped, there's something and there's some possibility that they can go back and prosecute or bring these people to justice somehow. We do suggest that unless, of course, it's me. I've got cable TV shows, and you just turn the other cheek in that case. Chalk that up to experience.
1:13:12🔗
Adam
That's right. You're not paying for this radio show, yet there's some entertainment and information being put forward. Drew, you want to take a break? Who are we going to talk to when we come back?
1:13:22🔗
Adam
George puts the sticker by the thing and then lets me do it. You don't want to sell it, Drew?
1:13:38🔗
Guest
Yeah, I was listening to the show last year, and I just broke my ankle, and I was on a track scholarship. And because of that, I couldn't go to the university, and I just didn't feel like going, and I was depressed. And the show with the drill instructors from boot camp was on.
1:13:55🔗
Adam
Well, turn your life around. Hold on a second. We'll see if we can't turn it back again and get you heading down the wrong path. Undeclared is the show we're talking about tonight. We got half the cast in, and we'll take ourselves a little break. We'll get back with Kurt after this.
1:14:11🔗
Hello, this is your radio. Love Line will be right...
1:15:05🔗
Adam
Stank. All right. Well, they'll be in here in a couple of weeks or days or something like that, right? Didn't we run into them on Saturday?
1:15:16🔗
Adam
It's a good song. Jacef and Carla are all here from Undeclared. Fox is a new hit. Tuesday Nights. That was an interesting cadence to that applause there. It was sort of a... It wasn't really a partisan crowd there. There were some folks who weren't excited about the show and the crowd. Let me hear that again. Oh, I see. There's milk in it. 8.30 Tuesday Nights on Fox. Top three, by the way. I mean, Fox is number three network now. Oh, nice. Crazy. Yeah. Congratulations. Absolutely. You're with ABC. You want to kill yourself about now. Oh, yeah. Got Fox in there. They're found by Fox. Wow. You got... Although, speaking of Fox, you guys watch The Family Guy?
1:16:13🔗
Caller
Then I think to myself, my God, wouldn't it be marvelous if I turned out to be homosexual?
1:16:31🔗
Guest
And because of that, I tore some ligaments and tendons in my knee and I couldn't go to college on my scholarship. And it was when you were really ranting and raving about 18-year-olds going into the military. If they were just going to go to junior college anyways.
1:16:47🔗
Guest
And the drill instructors from bootcamp were on there. And they were just talking and I was really out of it. I was just kind of moping around, not doing anything. And just the next morning, I went to my local recruiters and signed up. And I just want to thank you a lot for that because I probably would just end up being in junior college if it weren't for that.
1:17:08🔗
Motivate.
1:17:18🔗
Guest
I had to wait until the middle of the summer because my tech school doesn't start until the middle of January.
1:17:40🔗
Adam
Besides killing towelheads. Hodgeys. I mean, that's your major. Hodgeys, you have an emphasis.
1:17:52🔗
Guest
And then I had another question. Actually, it was my girlfriend. She wanted to know why in the shower, if you fart, why is it more amplified? And I figured you'd be the person to ask.
1:18:20🔗
Adam
Listen, you climb into a vacuum bag and blow wind, it's going to smell twice as bad than being in a blimp hanger. You got to do the math there, you know, in terms of cubic inches and volume and things like that. There's not much circulation going on, but the air is heavy and thick too, you know.
1:18:46🔗
Adam
I would like to, you know, my maid was at my house and I had a little, I had some bad gas while my maid was at the house and upstairs, I had to go into the bathroom and clean myself out a little bit. And I was sitting there just praying she wasn't going to come back and, you know, here, here, no, I did like a courtesy flush and stuff, but I didn't want her to hear what was going on in there. And you know, you got the tile floor, the tile walls, the, you know, the porcelain toilet acoustically. I mean, there's the only thing I got a terry cloth bathrobe that's supposed to absorb, you know, all the sound. And it's not, it's not working. I tried to do the cheek spread, but it didn't work. It got made a flapping noise. All I'm saying is, is I would like to do up a bathroom like a recording studio.
1:19:38🔗
Adam
Get that egg carton stuff on the ceiling and on the walls. Do that thing where they do in recordings, but actually cut the slab so it's independent of the slab that the house is on so the sound waves don't reverberate.
1:20:07🔗
Adam
Be good. What is that from? Aliens? Yeah. That would be great. We do like an alien porn movie called like Feltchian and the slug line is in space. No one can hear your ass scream.
1:20:32🔗
Hi.
1:20:34🔗
Caller
Yeah. Huge fan of your show. I listen every day. And my three teenage kids and I often discuss your program over breakfast.
1:20:44🔗
Caller
I'm a social worker and I just want, I do a lot of AIDS education and I just wanted to put it out there that breast milk is one of the ways that HIV is transferred.
1:20:53🔗
Drew
Well, it was thought to have been, but there was an article published a couple weeks ago that showed that risk was essentially nil.
1:21:00🔗
Drew
And obviously if your viral load is way up, everything is contagious, but and if I remember that study was on pregnant women who were under treatment and so I may be misspeaking a little bit that suppression of the viral titers is necessary to take away the infectivity of breast milk. So somebody who didn't know they had HIV and was at a high level of viral replication might be contagious.
1:21:29🔗
Drew
But I guess it's a controversial thing. But it's certainly worth people being aware of it, that's for sure, and worrying about any body fluid.
1:21:45🔗
Adam
Very normal guy. How bad would it be if Darwin just shot him a little shot of lactate in his mouth and got rid of him though? You know what I'm saying, is that such a bad thing?
1:22:21🔗
Adam
You guys, you sit down for breakfast and you like have to break off in discussion groups about what went on on Loveline the night before?
1:22:44🔗
Adam
Take care of yourself. You know, I don't know why I thought of this, but maybe it had to do with, you know, population control. But and then Hitler, you know, popped into my mind. I was, you know, I went to the dentist today and I got all screwed up. And so I just went home and, you know, popped some pills inside to watch the History Channel. And they had like a special on Hitler. It's always funny when they do these things like where you can really get to know the real hitler behind the musket. Yeah. Yeah. Here's what you didn't know about Hitler. It's great. And there's this so there's this one part. I just turn it on and they were talking about that. What is that? The crystal knock when they when they broke the glass, broke all the glass. And Drew, you're half Jew. What are you giving that? What are you looking for? Well, I don't know. Nineteen thirty eight and maybe nineteen thirty seven. I don't know. Maybe nineteen thirty nine. Just sort of right before World War Two. The Germans took to the streets and they went to the Jewish area and they broke all the glass and the crystal knock means like night of broken glass, you know, and the ninety one Jews were killed and that should have been. Wow. Anderson, what the hell was that?
1:23:58🔗
Adam
Ninety one Jews just died listening to that. And that should have been people should have known there was trouble afoot when this went on, but nobody paid attention to it. You don't know about that, Drew?
1:24:10🔗
Adam
Okay. So the point is, they said that a lot of people figured that Hitler was behind this and that he had called this and sort of gotten the whole anti-Semitic thing rolling and then that bled into World War II. But then they had some old guy who was like one of Hitler's wingman and Hitler's posse. Yeah. And his name was like. Entourage. Ice Helmet, I think the guy's name was. So they talked to him, he was like a guy in his 80s, you know, and he was like, no, no, no, no, Hitler had nothing to do with this. Hitler didn't even know about it. As a matter of fact, Hitler was upset when he found out. So he was basically defending Hitler and he thought, well that's a good angle, except for the part where he then exterminated six million Jews a few months later. You know, I mean, other than that, great angle on the defense, you know.
1:25:03🔗
Adam
It was just funny to hear the guy, he was indignant and he was a little upset. Not my Hitler. No, no, he had nothing to do with it. How dare you accuse him of this? He had nothing to do with it. Teddy Vandalism. As a matter of fact, I can tell you where he was. He was designing an oven to burn Jews at the time. He was nowhere near this. It was just funny to hear the guy really defending him.
1:25:36🔗
Caller
Yeah. I have a question for you guys. My boyfriend is thirty-two. We both talk about having a threesome. I wanted to know what the probability of the relationship surviving if we actually did do that.
1:25:57🔗
Drew
It has to get near zero. I see ships that will have a sort of a balance for a while that they can maintain with those kinds of behaviors, but I don't see them going long.
1:26:11🔗
Drew
It would be better, but then already we're kind of worried about what's up here, that this guy is so into this and you're so even considering it.
1:26:22🔗
Caller
Well, he's really into doing it and I'm open to it. I'm more nervous about it, which is why I'm calling.
1:26:31🔗
Adam
Well, I got a couple of thoughts. One is, we always hear about this screwing up the relationship because what happens is they have the threesome. The guy pays a little too much attention to the chick. The chick freaks out.
1:26:41🔗
Adam
They start arguing about it. Feelings come up and they break up two months later. But if they just kept having threesomes, I think they could push through.
1:26:55🔗
Drew
They develop some homeostasis where they're in bounds for a while but eventually the house of cards falls.
1:27:00🔗
Adam
If you've got a new threesome going every weekend, I think you could ride that horse for a long time.
1:27:07🔗
Caller
My fear would be getting jealous afterwards. It's very interesting to me at the time.
1:27:22🔗
Adam
See that, hold on. This is an interesting carrot to dangle in front of a woman. Which is, look, I'd love to marry you, I'd love to buy jewelry, I'd love to keep you at home, make babies and all that. I got a little laundry list here.
1:27:46🔗
Adam
Mom. That's right. And just a few more. It's a couple of chicks from high school. I got to check out the list.
1:27:55🔗
Adam
Anal, Golden Shower, the lactating chicks. I got that. I'd like to give you the gingivitis of your crotch. What the hell?
1:28:06🔗
Adam
E coli, vaginal E coli. I got a couple, just a few things to check off the list here, and then we can go ahead and get married.
1:28:16🔗
Drew
It's interesting. Gingivitis and vaginitis. Just switch that D and that G around, boy.
1:28:27🔗
Drew
Jenny, if he needs to get things out of his system, you need to break up for a little while, and he needs to get it out of his system, and then you guys get back together. That's how you do it.
1:28:43🔗
Adam
What does he get to do with the chick, though, while you're there? Pretty much everything.
1:28:51🔗
Drew
If he doesn't get to do everything, then he'll have to go back again and get it out of his system.
1:28:55🔗
Adam
That's right. There's still some that needs to be bled out of the system. I know how that goes.
1:29:14🔗
Adam
All right. Sorry. All right. He's going to kill himself. We're going to take a little break. Captain Undeclared is here tonight. We'll be right back.
1:29:26🔗
Call on the 1-800-LOVE-191.
1:29:57🔗
Caller
Hi, this is Jeremy McGrath, and you're listening to Loveline with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew.
1:30:05🔗
Adam
Jeremy McGrath, everybody, the world's greatest supercross rider. J-Seth and Carla are all here from Undeclared, 8.30 Tuesday nights, Fox, tomorrow's big episode starring or co-starring Adam Sandler, guest starring Adam Sandler.
1:30:23🔗
Adam
Rita Humpback here. Aisha Tyler in here from Talk Soup tomorrow night and Tori Amos in here from wherever she's from, from Mars on Wednesday night because she's like the world's weirdest chick. She could really give, oh, who the hell am I trying to think, Bjork. She could give Bjork a run for her money in the crazy, crazy department.
1:31:01🔗
Drew
I'm just kidding. She had a battery pack on to give her like some magnetic energies that she needed.
1:31:15🔗
Caller
Well, sometimes when I have sex, I'm uncircumcised and the skin on my penis gets pulled and it hurts.
1:31:24🔗
Drew
That's one of the drawbacks of having foreskin is it can tear and can narrow and become pain in the neck in terms of getting the head of the penis out of the skin, out of the foreskin. And sometimes it's even an indication of circumcision if that really starts tearing a lot and narrowing and hurting.
1:31:44🔗
Guest
And he said it wasn't that bad. I never believed him, but he claimed it wasn't that bad.
1:32:08🔗
Drew
But if it really starts tearing and narrowing, that's something you ought to see a urologist about.
1:32:54🔗
Guest
Well, she knows about it. And we've talked about it a lot. And she feels the same way.
1:33:11🔗
Guest
It's not just that. I mean, I don't really know if I really want to get into another relationship.
1:33:16🔗
Adam
Right. You're 18. Two's enough. Ride it out to the grave without having any kind of meaningful bond with another woman. You're right.
1:34:04🔗
Adam
If she's into you, which I'm... which I worry that she's not, because the fact that she's been in the planning stage for two years, like it's some kind of experimental rocket or something.
1:34:19🔗
Guest
Yeah. I mean, we've come... and she said that she's felt the same way for a long time.
1:34:41🔗
Drew
You answer my question. Matt, Matt, answer my question. You prevented it from going to the next step.
1:34:59🔗
Drew
If she stopped going to the next level, it's because she's not into you quite that way.
1:35:06🔗
Adam
Just go give it a shot. Go give it a try. Life's too short. You don't know. A shoot could malfunction. I'm kind of worried about it. You know what I mean? I mean, you don't know. The world is your oyster. That's right. I mean, because that's all the world is. I know I was kidding when I said that. I know I was not serious. I just couldn't have been.
1:35:35🔗
Caller
Right. He can't get an erection. I mean, I've asked my friends. Nobody else has had a problem with that. I mean-
1:35:40🔗
Adam
Well, he's a lightweight. You got to get him off that and stop doing that Ecstasy. It screws up your brain. And then she's calling from Hawaii and saying she doesn't really need her brain over there. It's pretty much just about like carving canoes and eating coins and stuff. There's nothing going on over there. You just have to know where stuff is, like the volcano is over there and the ocean is that way.
1:36:04🔗
Adam
Really? If there was a state where you didn't need your brain, would it be Hawaii? All right. But, you know, take it easy. You may come back to the mainland one day. We'll be back.
1:36:34🔗
Adam
We'll be right back. All right, Undeclared, everybody, that is the show. We should all go out and watch it tomorrow night. Adam Sandler will guest star in it.
1:37:35🔗
Adam
We do speak at a fair amount of colleges, but you burnt that one up with the Sandler storyline.
1:37:42🔗
Adam
We'll have us back. All right, we will be back tomorrow night, and until next time, is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying mahalo? There's still some that needs to be bled out of the system. I know how that goes.
1:38:01🔗
Caller
The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors for this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.