0:02🔗VoiceoverLove Line is meant for an adult audience. Love Line may contain sexually-oriented content. Listener discretion is advised. Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. Love Line Coast to Coast.
0:21🔗VoiceoverHey, everybody. It's Love Line. I'm Adam Corolla. It's Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew, Board Certified Physician and Addiction Medicine Specialist. Terry and Dryden are both here from Alien Ant Farm. Hi. Hi. Ty and Michael will be coming in from Alien Ant Farm. In about an hour, we'll do the old round robin like we do with the bands. You guys were in here just six months ago. Now, see, I would have get... I thought it was like three or four months.
0:56🔗Alien Ant FarmProbably a little longer though.
0:57🔗AdamApril is what I hear. Early April, the band was in here.
1:00🔗DrewDid you have all that hardware in your lip last time?
1:33🔗DrewDid the world situation slow your travel?
1:35🔗We were actually in London when it happened, and a million things run through your head when you're watching that, especially when you're in another country. But we actually left on time. We got there...
1:46🔗The day it happened, and we were scheduled to leave a week later, and we actually left on time. We had to go to the airport like five hours early.
1:57🔗Alien Ant FarmYeah, completely. There was some really... Everyone there was just baffled. Words obviously can't describe what happened, and those people were so nice to... I was glad in a way to not be here. It was a weird situation. I didn't know if I was happy. We were in New York two days before for the Video Music Awards we performed.
2:20🔗AdamOh, that's right. That was just a couple days before.
2:22🔗Alien Ant FarmWe stayed there actually for two days or so after, and we left, and I was kind of glad to be in London, you know, in a selfish way, but I was still... We know people from DreamWorks out there in New York and in tons of people.
2:34🔗I was hanging out with Jimmy, like, the day before we left.
3:15🔗AdamYou know, it's funny, every story, and we've had a hundred bands in here since the tragedy, every story is people trying to get out of a place and not being able to get out of place. You guys were kind of lucky in the sense that you just landed somewhere and weren't going anywhere for a week.
3:29🔗AdamAnd then when it was time to leave a week later, things had settled down enough for you to go, right?
3:35🔗Alien Ant FarmWe came back home through Heathrow in London, one of the biggest airports in the world, and I thought it was going to be just completely bizarre and just hard to get through. It was the quickest customs coming into US that I've ever experienced. Everyone was so cooperative.
3:53🔗Alien Ant FarmWell, no one wanted to mess around in there, you know?
3:56🔗AdamIt has. Drew and I have been talking about this for a while. It has thinned the herd a little bit at the airport. Drew and I have to do a fair amount of traveling. And traveling used to be something that people put a monogrammed blazer on for and an ascot and they got ready. And then Southwest came along and it's like 29 bucks anywhere in the country. And now you got some fat ass with cut-off sweatpants sitting next to you wearing flip-flops. And he, wait a minute, that was me.
4:37🔗What do you mean, you're going to cut me off?
4:39🔗AdamThat's right. But the point is, is now that this tragedy's happened and only the people who sort of need to travel are traveling, it's kind of thinned it out a little bit. It's cleaned out a little riff raff up there.
5:22🔗Alien Ant FarmIt is cool. And you know what's cool about it? Is Jay actually comes and says hi to you and expresses some interest in you.
5:30🔗You get like a card like handwritten by him and stuff.
5:34🔗Alien Ant FarmEven if it's just his job to come in and say hi, it's more than what's happened in the past with us and TV. Right. And it's really, it's cool, man. He stood there the whole time we played and right next to us and seemed like he enjoyed it thoroughly, you know? Even if he bobs his head just because he has to, I mean, we didn't even see Craig Kilborn. Like we didn't even see him.
5:56🔗Alien Ant FarmYeah. He's like, Alien Ant Farm and then they splice it, you know? And here it was just cool.
6:01🔗AdamWell, what a lot of people don't know is you do these shows, but you're lucky if you even catch eye contact with the host, oftentimes. They're strange, hurried, screwed up, introverted, extroverted people at the same time.
6:18🔗DrewAnd Sinbad came up and introduced himself.
6:20🔗AdamYeah, they come by your dressing room to try to sort of say hi and put you at ease, but they just make you nervous. Hey, how you doing, man? Hey, good to see you. Hey, I'm Sinbad. Hey, I got a purple jumpsuit. All right, I'll see you out there. Break a leg. And they run out of there. Hey, is that your fruit? Can I have some of that fruit? Whose kiwi is that? All right, I'll see you out there. Break a leg. Yeah. So, tonight's show tonight, and that'll be probably about 12, 20 or so, a little bit later on in the show.
6:47🔗Alien Ant FarmOoh, he even invited us on the couch.
6:50🔗Alien Ant FarmYeah, he even asked us to come sit on the couch with Dale Earnhardt Jr. Actually, it was his casting couch and it wasn't on the air. I got a little bit of the booty loving from Mr. Leno. Oh, yeah.
8:53🔗AdamYeah. Remember, you can't take drugs and be successful rock musician. Do you understand that? It hasn't happened yet. As far as I can see, it's never going to happen.
10:08🔗CallerI have a question for actually Dr. Drew. Well, first, Alien Ant Farm, you guys rock. Thank you. But my question is for Dr. Drew. Yeah. For the past year, year and a half, I've been going to rave and doing E on a weekly basis every weekend. And I've been doing a therapist for the past month, almost a month, at my parents' request for depression and things like that. And she wants to go ahead and put me on some kind of antidepressant.
10:34🔗DrewYeah. You're going to need to be on them the rest of your life, unfortunately. Yeah.
10:37🔗CallerCan I say something about that? Like, I've heard stuff and you can probably even school me on this. But like my grandmother works at like military hospitals and stuff like that. And I've heard what is it? It's it releases serotonin, I believe, and like excessively. And it can lead to like Parkinson's eventually.
10:53🔗DrewWell, it actually burns out the parts of the brain that are responsible for maintaining your mood. And there's something called a dopamine transporter that's knocked out. And there's the serotonin cells are knocked out. And you end up depressed the rest of your life. And it comes on kind of insidiously, usually sort of panic attacks and fear of being in crowds, sort of an unpleasant kind of uncomfortable agitated feeling a lot of the time. And eventually you fall into a pretty good depression. And MDMA, you end up on medicine your whole life.
11:18🔗AdamYeah, but how much of it have you done, Jonathan?
11:24🔗CallerOh, probably more than that. So the thing is, like, I guess it's a mild addiction and I don't feel like I can stop and I don't want to stop. And if I go on antidepressant, what happens if I'm on it for a month and I do eat? Will I die?
11:57🔗Alien Ant FarmJonathan, there's better music than rave music, and there's safer drugs than eating.
12:05🔗DrewWhat you need to do, though, is talk to the person that's prescribing these antidepressants about your habits. I mean, they deal with that all the time, and they may plan differently in terms of how they're going to treat you, and they need that information in order to treat you effectively. And one of the things they may decide to do is not to put you on antidepressants if you're just going to go ahead and do drugs anyway.
12:26🔗AdamJust save it for later. You're going to need it. It just seems like the world's worst plan to get high a couple dozen times between the age of like 18 and 21, and then just walk around depressed with no memory your whole life.
12:40🔗AdamJust paying for it your entire life. And ironically not even remembering the good times you allegedly had when you were really f'ed up at the rave.
12:49🔗Alien Ant FarmHey, just drink wheatgrass and pretend it's E.
12:57🔗CallerYeah. What's going on, guys? I've been trying to get through for a little while. I guess my main question right now is to Dr. Drew. Although, Adam, I can tell.
13:22🔗Alien Ant FarmI want to tell you how much I love you. Whoever's going to answer.
13:24🔗DrewI love you, Adam, who's going to answer.
13:25🔗CallerNo, it's not that. Pretty much it's, all right. I am a pot smoker. I write a lot of music. I love playing guitar. Other than that, that's like my main emotional outlet. So, maybe some of the guys from Alien Ant Farm can.
13:42🔗Alien Ant FarmI have no idea what you're talking about.
13:45🔗CallerYeah. My question pretty much is, is every time I get into a relationship that I'm serious about, it seems to me that either the girl, like once I start showing her, you know, my true emotions and how I feel about her, she kind of shuts down a little bit and withdraws from the relationship. And I see this to be a pattern.
15:35🔗Alien Ant FarmYou know what works for me? I would probably just, before you tell a girl that you really love her, is maybe you could send her a blank tape with Sweet Child of Mine on it.
15:45🔗Alien Ant FarmAnd that guitar solo usually does the trick.
15:47🔗DrewHere's why that's not the issue. Because five months into a relationship, most women are wondering why he hasn't told them that he's in love.
15:55🔗CallerYeah, I was about, I was going to say wrong people probably.
15:58🔗DrewThat's right. So already they were checking out, it was something to do with his behavior at that point in the relationship, not the fact that he said he was into it. If he'd said a week into it he's in love, then yeah, then he chased them away.
16:09🔗AdamBut there's a difference between telling someone you're in love with them and giving them the heebie-jeebies. Which you get real needy and clingy and weird.
17:00🔗Alien Ant FarmWell, I went with, I had like discoloration in my mucus, just something like irritated from, I think I just got like a.
17:08🔗DrewYou stop the antibiotics. This is why you shouldn't take antibiotics unless you absolutely categorically know you need it, because the potential negative effects are often greater.
17:17🔗AdamWell, how do you know he doesn't need it?
17:18🔗Alien Ant FarmBut, I don't know, maybe placebo-wise, but it really did help me, like the first two days, like my sickness just really did dissipate really fast.
17:26🔗DrewThey had a thing in London, in England, they're trying to discourage people from using antibiotics. They said, if you see the doctor get an antibiotic, you'll get better in three days. If you see the doctor, don't get antibiotics, you'll get better in three days. That's just the way it works.
17:37🔗AdamAll right. So, well, who prescribed this antibiotic? I mean, didn't they know what they were doing?
17:42🔗DrewWe are, well, we, you have no idea how many times a day I reluctantly prescribe an antibiotic to people that don't need it.
17:48🔗DrewPeople, you're just hammering me. Why? Why take it? Is that it? People insist, when they see a doctor, they insist on some kind of treatment.
17:56🔗AdamYou didn't insist on antibiotics, did you?
17:58🔗Alien Ant FarmNo, I just wanted to know why my mucus was in the brownish color.
18:02🔗AdamWell, now it's coming out of your ass. Well, Drew, couldn't he take some laxative or softener or hardener, eat some paste or something?
18:10🔗DrewThere's something called pseudomembranous colitis that's a really kind of a serious bacterial overgrowth that you can get from augmentin. If he takes the Lomotel or the Imodium or something, it can create some bad side, some bad problems.
18:59🔗CallerThe kind you got to put a boot on to break it up. So it'll go down.
19:02🔗AdamYou want you want to know what the greatest Duke I ever saw was a bowl winder. My buddy, Chris, this was such a bowl winder that it actually, it was so big, it surfaced that it's spun around when the toilet was flush.
19:20🔗DrewWait, he can't stand it. Anderson can't stand the stool.
19:22🔗AdamLeft a continuous skid mark all the way around the bowl like a propeller. Like a spiral. It was like a marker with two n's on it just turning around. It looked like a...
19:32🔗Alien Ant FarmIt was one of those smelly markers too.
19:35🔗AdamYeah, it went all the way around, left a hash mark, and then eventually snapped in the middle and went down by its own weight. By its own weight, yeah, once the water left.
19:44🔗DrewI've paid the picture for me too. Chris is like, hey Adam, come here and check this out. Oh, dude, and flushes it for you? Do you watch the dude float around and then you flushed it and you applauded?
19:56🔗AdamWhen you have male roommates and one of them does a serious piece of work, he will call the other roommates into the bathroom and have them witness it.
20:05🔗DrewThere is a chimpanzee theater in this somewhere, isn't there?
20:23🔗AdamDrew, we have pictures. The guys running and grab cameras.
20:26🔗Alien Ant FarmShe told me earlier she did it.
20:27🔗CallerWe've seen it all. I mean, we live on a bus with 11 people.
20:32🔗Alien Ant FarmBut you can't let any bullwinders loose on the bus.
20:36🔗CallerYou know what? Remember the time we were on tour with Papa Roach and Kobe called you into the bathroom to show you his poo and it was green.
20:43🔗Alien Ant FarmI have it in my backpack here.
22:05🔗CallerSounds like a song by some band that my guitar tech cadaver would listen to. And you can guess what kind of music he listens to having a name like cadaver.
22:12🔗CallerSputum and Stool, Sputum and Stool, Sputum and Stool.
22:14🔗DrewAlright Anderson and I are feeling it right now.
22:16🔗AdamPlease, please. Sputum and Stool, Sputum and Stool. Anderson, stop that.
22:20🔗AdamTerry and Dryden are both here from Alien Ant Farm on the Tonight Show tonight. A little bit later on, probably about 1220 or so. Anthology is the name of the CD. And we will hear something off of that in just one moment. Take a call to Joe over here. Hey Joe, you're 15.
23:04🔗AdamLet me ask you this. What's the deal with him? What is it about idiots that where they feel the necessity to make proclamations before every question? You know what I mean? It's always like this. They're like, okay, okay. Bob, you're 15. What's your question? First, let me clear the air. It's like, no, just ask the goddamn question.
23:25🔗Alien Ant FarmCan't he just say he has diarrhea like me?
23:27🔗AdamLet me say this. I'm a pot smoker. I'm a musician and I'm a lover.
23:32🔗Alien Ant FarmAnd I'm sure Alien Ant Farm can relate to playing music, right? Because you guys play music, right?
24:05🔗CallerWell, see, I got this... This constant fear that I can't live up to my dad's expectations, even though he hasn't, you know... There's no clear set expectations. It's just around report card time or whatever. I just feel anxiety.
24:21🔗AdamWhat does your dad do? Is he a successful guy? Professional wrestler.
24:25🔗CallerYeah, he's a police officer for about 20 years. Now he works with the government.
24:31🔗AdamOkay. And he's just one of these perfectionist types?
26:18🔗CallerWell, I got another question. Yeah. I'm somewhat of an insomniac, like I can't fall asleep until like four o'clock in the morning, then I got to get up at five.
27:17🔗CallerMan, I would be like getting up at 638.
27:20🔗AdamPoor Brian. First off, you know when people tell you that sleep thing and you never believe them? They go like, I go to bed every night at four, and I get up at 415, and that's how much I sleep. And you're like, no, you don't. There's no way you go to bed at 4 a.m. and get up at 5. You would die in three days.
27:41🔗Alien Ant FarmPeople use migraine and insomnia way too loosely because migraines are almost impossible to have, and insomnia is pretty gnarly and hardcore.
27:51🔗DrewWhat do you think? Maybe he has an eating disorder. Maybe that's what it goes down here.
28:24🔗AdamYeah. Drink some red wine. That's what I do. All right. All right. Smoke pot. Put you to bed. Put your bed nice and early. Get some of that Ambien or something like that.
28:38🔗CallerNot enough doctors recommend that, I think.
28:40🔗AdamRed wine. It's good for you. Not when you drink four bottles every night. Like maybe. You drink a bottle, you go to bed. It's great. Dream about grapes.
28:49🔗Alien Ant FarmNo 16-year-old is going to drink one glass of red wine a night.
28:53🔗AdamThat's true. It's going to be like a court of boons farm.
28:58🔗AdamAlien Ant Farm is here. Let's hear a little something off their CD anthology, which is sold over a million copies. Thank you. One million. This is the big hit.
33:03🔗AdamWell, I guess, yeah, it's the Universal Amphitheater, and it's got a roof on it. It must be confusing to most people that grow up around here.
33:10🔗Alien Ant FarmI never got that either, but I just took it for what it was.
34:06🔗AdamAll right. We're going to take ourselves a little break, Alien Ant Farm, our guest tonight. Drew, who are we going to talk to when we come back?
35:22🔗AdamHey, everybody, Love Line. I'm Adam. That's Drew over there. Terry and Dryden are both here from Alien Ant Farm. Ty and Mike are going to be coming in here from Alien Ant Farm in about 15, 20 minutes or so. Anthology is the name of the CD. On with Jay Leno tonight. And you guys got a website, some people who are listening around the country, want to go see you guys.
35:46🔗CallerYeah, it's just www.alienantfarm.com. Very creative.
37:27🔗CallerThis one doesn't actually involve crap. You get a bunch of guys and you pick a person. A couple of people get on his legs, a couple of people get it on his arms. You take a piece of saran wrap, put it over their mouth, and you cover their eyes too so they can't see, and someone's beating off this whole time. Then after like 30 seconds or so when they really need breath, you take off the saran wrap and the blindfold at the same time, right as the person's coming. When you take off the saran wrap, your first instinct, you breathe in automatically. And I think you can fix it.
38:55🔗AdamYou'd be fine. I've done it many times. I almost drown in a kiddie pool filled with semen once. Or maybe I was dreaming. You ever guys ever fall into a kiddie pool filled with semen?
39:28🔗AdamOh, Drew, please. All right, so now, what about the Dirty Sanchez? We had kind of a handle on that last night, but what is your interpretation of the Dirty Sanchez?
39:38🔗CallerThe Dirty Sanchez is just more or less when you stick your finger in your butt crack or in your butt, if you want to get really into it. And then you walk up to your unsuspecting friend and wipe your finger across his upper lip.
39:53🔗Alien Ant FarmBetter yet, our drummer Mike came up with the Dirty Sangria, which is the girl on menstruating, sticks it in and gives you a red upper lip. That's the Sangria.
40:26🔗CallerNot much. I just have these thoughts about my boyfriend with another guy, and it really turns me on, and I was wondering if that's really, really weird.
41:33🔗CallerWell, he was with a guy once, but that was a long time ago. I don't know. He was like, okay, good job. He didn't really have that much of a reaction to it.
41:44🔗DrewI get this sense though that your perceptions of him at time break down what we call part objects. It's like he's all good or all bad or all aggressive. Some of these things you have very intense sexual reactions to. Where did that come from?
42:03🔗AdamShe's not going to answer that. She can't answer that.
42:37🔗CallerIn the other room, sleeping, actually.
42:39🔗DrewWhat happens Wednesday is when you have those kinds of traumas, it blunts your ability to develop higher levels of emotional organization, and people become, especially when you're stressed, they become fragmented in terms of your perceptions of them, and some of these fragmented pieces of who you feel them to be can be highly arousing pieces, and usually arousal for you will be something aggressive and traumatic.
43:04🔗AdamHave you ever got any help for what your dad did to you?
43:07🔗CallerNo. I recently just told my boyfriend, I recently just told anyone about it, and it was very hard to talk about it. I told my boyfriend, I told my best friend, I told my mom, and the weirdest thing was my mom didn't react at all. She was just like, oh, the bastard, and went along about her business.
43:25🔗DrewBecause that happened to her too, no doubt, when she was growing up.
43:29🔗AdamYeah. She would have gotten hooked up with this guy.
43:32🔗CallerNo, no, no, no, no. I know my grandfather, he wouldn't have done that sort of thing.
43:35🔗DrewWell, I don't think necessarily your dad, could have been anyone, someone else abused her.
43:39🔗AdamRight. Okay. So your dad did this to you for how long?
43:56🔗CallerWell, my grandma died and I started getting more. My grandma was my best friend and like I started getting more aggressive and like telling him to like go away and I started beating on him.
44:39🔗AdamWatch out. Just take it nice and slow. C, you got to think about a little therapy, a little counseling, maybe a group or something.
44:47🔗DrewEven just dealing with drug addicted parents, you know, Al-Anon, that kind of thing. Something, some place to get started because there's a whole sort of world you need to begin processing.
44:58🔗AdamAnd you got to get out of that house too.
45:02🔗AdamGet a job, move out, start your own life. And don't, don't let what your dad did to you the years that he stole from you, steal your whole life. Do you know what I mean? This is what happens. People take three or four years of the kid's life. And then the kid takes the next 50 on by their own hand, by getting into drugs, by cranking out a bunch of kids, by getting hooked up with abusive guys, by getting into bad situations. You don't have to do that.
45:33🔗AdamGood. I'm looking. I'm all right with this guy. Okay. So, but you got to get in a group, a little counseling. You know what I'm saying? Take it slow because you're going to have lots of feelings about this, all right? All right. All right.
46:43🔗CallerLove Line with Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. We'll be right back.
47:21🔗AdamHey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-LLVE-191. Terry has left the studio, and Ty has taken his place. Alien Ant Farm, our guest tonight on Leno on The Tonight Show Tonight. And that means you've arrived, by the way, when you've done The Tonight Show. Hold on, Drew, you've ever done The Tonight Show?
48:12🔗DrewYou will have laser on your faggity self as you say.
48:15🔗AdamAnthology is the name of the CD. We'll hear something else. Off of it very soon. And Drew, who's coming in here tomorrow night? Is it Miss USA?
49:23🔗Alien Ant FarmIt's actually just a kid that the director, Mark Clausefeld, just hired through an agency. And I think Mark was we kind of all just said, hey, let's find a kid who knows how to dance. And we thought that's cool.
49:37🔗CallerThis guy found him. He's awesome. And so are you guys. You guys are badass.
49:41🔗Alien Ant FarmThe kid is better. The kid is truly better.
49:45🔗CallerYeah. Well, not really. But you guys are both pretty good.
50:31🔗AdamWhen you pick your face though, don't you need a starting point? Like, I'll pick my face, but I need to start on a zit and then I, you know, that's my jumping off point.
50:40🔗You know, it's kind of these little things, but.
50:42🔗AdamI like to finish with a nose squeeze, get those things out of there.
50:46🔗Alien Ant FarmWhat kind of gratification do you get after you've already injured yourself? Well, how far do you take it also?
50:52🔗Oh, I don't like it. I don't want to do it, but it's like, I can't stop. I keep telling myself, I'm not going to do this anymore. And it just, it'll get a little better and then it'll get worse. And it's been going on for a very long time. And I just wanted to do recommendation.
51:10🔗Alien Ant FarmWe met a girl in the UK with this problem, but the most severe I'd ever, ever seen. And trust me, you don't want to look like this girl.
51:22🔗Sometimes it gets to the point where I don't even want to leave the house.
51:25🔗DrewBut that's usually speed, when you pick till you get ulcers in your face and stuff.
51:28🔗Alien Ant FarmThis girl was from her wrist to her ankles, her hair, everything was cut on her body.
52:08🔗Alien Ant FarmIf this girl says she doesn't do stimulants, like how does she stop doing it?
52:12🔗DrewWell, believe it or not, this is thought to be a biological process in the brain that is a particular region that activates, that causes kind of compulsive behavior. Now, certainly there is an emotional source to it that if she's wanted to get in long-term therapy and would try to figure it out, she could. But in terms of stopping the behavior, medication has the highest probability of stopping it in its tracks.
52:31🔗Oh, I don't want to do medication. I've actually been prescribed for manic.
52:38🔗AdamListen here, nut job. You want to walk around looking like a pinhead or do you want to take some pills? What's it going to be?
52:47🔗Oh, I don't want to be dependent on anything.
52:49🔗AdamWell, right now you're dependent on picking your face.
52:51🔗DrewYeah, in the meantime get some therapy and figure it all out.
52:53🔗AdamYou do what I do. You localize to the nose. I go right for the nostril when I got to pick around my face. I pick my nose like a madman when I drive the car.
53:12🔗AdamTake your meds, would you please take your medication?
53:16🔗Does it actually exist, or is it just like in my head that I'm just making this up, that it's something, I don't know, a bad habit?
53:24🔗DrewYour brain is mandating this behavior. If you don't change the chemistry of your brain or the psychology in which that is sort of being generated, which takes a long time, you're going to keep doing this.
53:34🔗AdamAll right. I just take that, put on some...
53:37🔗DrewI guess they're behavioral treatments out there for this.
53:39🔗AdamPut some oven mittens on and duct tape them, like a boxer. Yeah.
53:43🔗Alien Ant FarmI mean, you can still find like a sharp something, the edge of a coffee table or something.
55:50🔗Alien Ant FarmIt's weird because my first I'm not a really religious person and it's pretty easy to bash any kind of religion. And I just thought it would be not very classy and a very easy move to just knock it. And so I thought it'd be better to embrace it and make it more of a love story and a love song. Even though I'm not religious, it turned out really passionate and good.
56:52🔗AdamAnyway. You know Kim's hot. Do you hear all that attitude pouring out of her? Always tell the good looking chicks.
56:59🔗CallerAdam's going to tell me I can't ask another song.
57:02🔗AdamAll right. You want to answer that question?
57:05🔗Alien Ant FarmWhispers about, we did a lot of showcasing at the Viper Room, and we got turned down by every single major label that you could name. We played in front of every label and they turned us down, and whispers about that experience.
57:26🔗AdamYeah. It's a classy F-U. I like that. You don't hear classy in F-U. Put so closely together in a sentence. Drew, do you ever hear it's a classy F-U?
57:37🔗Alien Ant FarmWell, I mean, just the success of, you know, we're still a baby band. We have a lot to prove. We're writing on a cover right now. I've heard a lot of bands kind of knock us for it. I'm digging it, and I dig the band, and like I said, it's a classy way to just, the success of this record is kind of gratification.
57:57🔗AdamRight. Especially all those a-holes that turned you down. All right, Drew, you ready?
58:23🔗CallerI'm calling because I'm kind of at my wits' end. I've been married for almost four years now. And since about after the first five months, we've been having a lot of sex problems, I guess. Well, to me, they're problems anyway.
59:02🔗CallerIf my son doesn't go to bed till 10, you know, it's too late. I can put him to bed at 8. It doesn't seem to matter. I've tried just about everything.
59:11🔗AdamHow is she with you? Is she happy with you?
59:14🔗CallerYou know, I would assume, I, you know, I...
59:17🔗DrewOnce a week might just be her sort of, you know, her pace.
1:00:08🔗AdamHey, John, there's two things that are going on here. One is, as I agree with Drew, that could just be her rhythm. She could be a once a week or it'll move up as she gets uglier and fatter.
1:00:21🔗AdamSo don't worry about that. The more hair she gets on her upper lip, the more she wants to hump. That's how women are.
1:00:27🔗Alien Ant FarmSend her off to tour for about 10 months and when she comes home, she'll want to hump you every day.
1:00:33🔗AdamYeah. Can she start a band? So John, that could be it. The other thing is those women really... Here's the thing. Okay. Here's what I want to say. I'm going to try to word this the right way. Sweet talker.
1:00:46🔗AdamWomen don't have a set libido like men do. Men have a set libido and it doesn't matter if they're depressed or they're angry or they're drunk or they're high or they're tired.
1:01:08🔗AdamBut you got a cycle. It's a set cycle. It's two times a week, it's five times a week, it's once a week, whatever it is. Men have a cycle. It's usually more than less. But women, they're flexible. I mean, they're straddle the sex fence and say, well, I could go this way or I could go this way. Let's see how I feel.
1:01:29🔗Alien Ant FarmDoes it have anything to do, you think, with that obviously like women know, not all women know, but they kind of have the upper hand where...
1:01:38🔗DrewThey're just in a different biological milieu. They just they live in a different biological world. There's no there's not the kind of drive.
1:01:48🔗Alien Ant FarmI think it's next to Lake Paris.
1:01:49🔗AdamThey live in milieu next to Lake Paris.
1:01:51🔗DrewBut that's the point is that they may have a certain drive that's that's that's driven.
1:01:56🔗AdamWell, here's the thing about a woman. If a guy keeps pounding away at her and scratching and panhandling for sex, she'll get even further away.
1:02:07🔗AdamAnd so what happens is this syndrome where young John over here is ready to go seven days a week. She's ready to go one day a week. He starts scratching at her a little bit. And now it's three times a month. You want to try for twice a month? Keep scratching.
1:02:22🔗DrewWomen hate being objectified. They hate being pushed into sex.
1:02:24🔗AdamNow, what John has to do is the opposite of what he wants to do.
1:02:39🔗AdamYeah, that's my favorite beat-off sound. So would he... Sorry to tear you away from the TV there, Anderson. I didn't mean to. But so the thing he needs to do... I'm on a roll here. Yeah, you need to... He needs to figure out her language and start speaking that... That's right... .instead of speaking his own language. That's correct. You want more sex? You can't talk about sex.
1:03:37🔗AdamAll right. Here's what you got to do. You do stuff. Here's what chicks love. Hey, enough about me. How was your day today? What did you do? And act interested.
1:04:06🔗Alien Ant FarmIt's probably better if you're actually... It's probably better. It works better if you actually really are interested. Then it's fun for the both of you.
1:04:13🔗AdamIt's impossible, though, because you know what store you're listening to? The Tammy is a bitch for the 155th time that month. She thinks she's so cool with her nails. Well, I got a French dip. Uh-huh. Oh, that Tammy. She's got a lot of nerve, that Tammy. Because we all know you pioneered the unicorn on the nails thing. It's an homage. She's doing it because she's jealous. She's very catty.
1:04:41🔗AdamYeah, Tammy. She's no trendsetter. She's a follower. All right. Just pretend to listen for like five minutes. It's really tough, but you got to do that. Michelle?
1:05:12🔗CallerAnd everyone. And like I have a crush on one of my guy friends. And he considers me like his best friend. And he's always telling me, oh, yeah, this girl Malik, she's so hot, blah, blah. And he's always asking me for advice on how to ask her out on a date. And like, I can't act normal around him because I have a crush on him.
1:05:29🔗DrewMaybe not hang out with that guy anymore. You're just torturing yourself.
1:05:32🔗CallerYeah. And like, it's starting to be like...
1:05:34🔗DrewMichelle, maybe not hang out with him. Seriously.
1:05:47🔗CallerWell, like, he'll tell me that. He's just like, God, and you're so pretty and you just have the greatest personality. You know, I could never lose you as a friend.
1:05:53🔗AdamOh, that's so bad. Whenever a guy starts factoring in personality, it's a kiss of death.
1:05:59🔗CallerMy smile will just, like, fade away.
1:06:12🔗DrewYeah, Michelle, unless you get away from this guy, you're not going to be available to sort of gain a crush on someone else. You're going to keep infatuation with this guy. And this is not going anywhere. You're torturing yourself. You may be a good friend. That's fine. But stay away for a while.
1:06:25🔗AdamAnd here's the reality. The best you can do is a woman who's scraping away at a guy who you like, you're pining away for, you get a drunken mercy F at some point down the road.
1:06:36🔗Alien Ant FarmYeah, don't waste your year.
1:06:38🔗DrewAnd then you're really in and now you're screwed because you're not going to get any reciprocity. He's not going to come. He's not going to be in more just because he had sex with you. No way.
1:06:47🔗AdamPut it this way. When you were a 17-year-old guy and you were in high school, you saw every chick in your school, right? And you pretty much made a decision what group they were in. Pretty much on the first appearance, right?
1:07:00🔗AdamEffable or not or did you want to date them or did you want them for your girlfriend or did you want to pursue them or not? And there wasn't too many on the fence and there wasn't too many who went from pen A to pen B ever. I don't remember one. It was either like definitely no, definitely yes.
1:07:40🔗AdamThey can have a guy who they're not that into. That's why they assume it will work on us but it won't. We're not going to fall for that. We're way too shallow.
1:08:04🔗AdamIt's how you, when a guy's following you and you go and you put it in his tailpipe and then his car stalls out and then you can take off, right? That's the banana in the tailpipe, right?
1:10:00🔗Alien Ant FarmHe kind of felt like it. I mean, he wanted to.
1:10:04🔗AdamAlien Ant Farm are guests tonight. You can find them on Leno in about an hour, maybe a little bit less than an hour on the Tonight Show tonight. Anthology is the name of the CD. I bet you already have it.
1:11:38🔗CallerBecause I thought that, you know, like, a guy could actually get tired of it or bored. So I tried to, like, make things exciting and I changed it a little.
1:12:36🔗DrewOkay. Well, are you worrying about the similar kind of thing here with the sex?
1:12:38🔗CallerYeah. They don't want to straight out ask them and make it a turn off, you know?
1:12:43🔗AdamYeah. I know how it is. Women start talking about sex. Me, sorry, honey. You ain't getting no dick. It may be a week. You want to shoot for a month? Keep talking about sex, smart girl. That's right. And you know what? It includes blow jobs too, baby. There'll be none of that. Take one for the road, but that's it. He'll shut right down. How many kids you have?
1:13:50🔗DrewThat's it. You don't worry about the poo running out or the pee running out.
1:13:53🔗AdamWell, and the thing about guys, it's like a team. You know, some guys are Yankees fans, some guys are Dodgers fans, and they take that to their grave, and they take their love of whatever kind of pizza and the toppings they have on it to their grave. It's pretty much, guys are idiots, really. We just do the same thing over and over until we die.
1:14:49🔗CallerYeah, first of all, you guys rock, but okay, here's my question. Me and my girlfriend, we've been together for a year and a half. She's wonderful personality-wise, you know, me and her just emotionally click, you know, I mean, we truly love each other. But physically, she's, you know, she's kind of boring me after a while now. But she's got these two friends that are trying to put the moves on me for a couple months. Physically, I'm really attracted. You know, they're hot. They're really hot, and I'm really debating if I want to get down and dirty with them.
1:15:19🔗DrewWell, of course, you should screw over your girlfriend. If you love her so much that you should just screw over, that's great.
1:15:24🔗AdamWell, how do you know her two friends are really hot for you?
1:15:28🔗CallerWell, I mean, you know, they've been trying to put the moves on me.
1:15:31🔗DrewWhy would you even call them your friends? Her friends, rather. What if your friends were doing that to her? Would they still be your friends?
1:15:36🔗AdamHold on. That's a stupid statement, Drew. They're her friends, you idiot.
1:15:59🔗CallerThey've gotten drunk and done a little touchy feely with each other. But I mean, they've tried to get down on me before in the hot tub when my girlfriend was gone. And I didn't.
1:16:09🔗AdamHold on. Where did your girlfriend go while you guys were in the hot tub?
1:16:13🔗CallerShe actually went off to the store to buy a little six pack with a couple of her friends.
1:16:17🔗AdamOh, while you guys were in the hot tub?
1:16:19🔗CallerYeah. Yeah. She left her friend Nicole in the hot tub with me. And Nicole took her top, trying to put the mousse on and...
1:16:27🔗AdamNow we don't believe you, Mike. Sorry, Mike. All right. Sorry, buddy.
1:16:33🔗AdamHe just hung up. It's great. It's funny too because he sounded like Rob Schneider's... No, not Rob. Not the... No, who's the character? Damn, on Saturday Night Live, the Chronic Liar. Yeah, that's the ticket.
1:17:10🔗Alien Ant FarmI wanted to ask, can I ask Drew another question? Sure. I've just heard a couple of guys talk about it. I was not really interested in it at all. I just wanted to know what was up with it, taking Viagra recreationally. Is that pretty gnarly?
1:17:27🔗DrewPotentially dangerous. We don't know. I mean, it's a medication. It's not a medication.
1:17:35🔗DrewThe Viagra drug rep was in my office today, and he was complaining about people expecting Viagra to be something that would improve sexual arousal. When it really doesn't, it just affects erection. It causes you to get hard.
1:17:48🔗CallerWe have these crazy competitions every once in a while. See who could bag as many girls as we can in one day.
1:17:55🔗Alien Ant FarmNo, it was actually someone in Europe had told me that they had taken, I don't even know how many milligrams of it it was. Obviously, don't know what they were doing. I split the tab in quarters or whatever they did, and said to the point that it just hurt, like they couldn't lose it.
1:18:14🔗DrewIf they got Priapism, then they couldn't lose the erection. Then you lose the capacity for erection, you get permanent erectile dysfunction from that. Painful erection will not go away.
1:18:23🔗Alien Ant FarmYou could stay hard, and then once that goes away, you're screwed.
1:18:27🔗DrewYeah, painful sustained erection is called Priapism, and that can cause permanent erectile dysfunction. So then it's a painful and comfortable erection well beyond...
1:18:36🔗Alien Ant FarmSo obviously using it recreational, we would be...
1:18:42🔗AdamAll right, well hold on, let me weigh in here. Let me say a few things. First off, any guy who does not have an erectile problem, who's gonna take Viagra, is gonna be a horny guy anyway. You know what I mean? And he's looking for the cherry on top of the horny sundae.
1:18:57🔗Alien Ant FarmAnd it's not gonna be there with the drug.
1:18:59🔗AdamHe's already a horny guy. Well, no, I'm not saying that necessarily. If you are a guy and you have a boner that won't quit, you're gonna want to do something with it. And so you'll be horny just by process of elimination. It's like you have a boner that could cut glass. Of course.
1:19:16🔗AdamYou have a bunker buster in your underpants. You're gonna want to do something with it. But here's the real question. Is a young, healthy man who's horny already, whose penis works fine already, you don't need it.
1:19:34🔗DrewYeah. They're using it sometimes in medication, sexual dysfunction, like antidepressants. And some women have anecdotally reported that they become multi-orgasmic on it. The studies are really not yet out yet on what it does for women. And many claim that it just does nothing. A lot of women say it doesn't do anything for them.
1:19:50🔗AdamHey Anderson, do you have Ozzie on Viagra?
1:19:54🔗CallerI'm going Sharon, I'm ready! She's going, get lost! I'm lying here like I'm camping with the temple.
1:20:02🔗AdamHe was telling us about taking Viagra and raping his wife. It was really funny though. Did you hear the way he said it? Puckish. I think he's writing a song about it actually. Gabriel?
1:21:41🔗CallerNo. They didn't tell me they were going to.
1:21:44🔗DrewYou actually, you're sure you had this vasectomy?
1:21:46🔗CallerYeah. I had the vasectomy. They told me it was supposed to be like three months I was supposed to go, supposed to get a test.
1:21:54🔗DrewRight. They had you come back usually for three subsequent sperm counts.
1:21:58🔗CallerThey didn't really give me too many details.
1:22:00🔗CallerThey just gave me a cup and an office to go to. They didn't tell me when or...
1:22:05🔗DrewYou know, Gabriel, I think some of this detail may have gotten lost with the freezing of the sperm too. Because they usually give you explicit directions on coming back, having follow-up sperm testing, sperm counts. So why don't you call them up and see what their routine is for that?
1:22:20🔗DrewAll right. Three months, test you, test you, test you, and then when your third one is negative, then you're free and clear.
1:22:26🔗AdamLet me tell you the conversation that went on at the clinic. I was like, he's 19, he has no children. This is unusual. We can't do this. And then someone went, hey, did you talk to the dude?
1:22:43🔗AdamYeah. You're smart. You're right. Let's cut this guy now. Let's do it tonight before he knocks someone off. Hi, Gabriel. Go back and talk to the good folks that sniffed in. They'll tell you, right? So what is it? Get the procedure and then they test it a few times, right? Yeah. Three times?
1:22:58🔗DrewUsually it's three times. If the third is negative, you're free and clear.
1:23:01🔗AdamWhy would you need to do it? If you gave the first sample, it had no sperm in it.
1:23:06🔗DrewBecause sometimes they can what's called re-canalize. I had a friend, a friend I sent for a vasectomy, had two negatives, and then three months later, got his wife pregnant.
1:25:39🔗CallerWhen you're dividing the land in thirds.
1:25:41🔗AdamWhat percentage of the buying public recognizes Churchill in this picture? Have you got any feedback on that?
1:25:49🔗Alien Ant FarmSince you'd probably think maybe the majority of people that buy rock records are probably like 15 to 17 year old girls. They probably have no idea that they're like, wow, these are army guys here.
1:26:06🔗AdamYou know what I love about chicks? Chicks know nothing about war.
1:26:13🔗AdamYeah, probably. But I would reckon if you asked most women, now World War I and World War II, they got a number to them, so that's pretty easy. And we should have called, you know, Vietnam 3 or Korea 3 and Vietnam 4 and Desert Shield 5 or something like that. But the point is, you know what I love? I love women whose dads did something real cool in Vietnam, like the guy with some sort of special operations guy or he flew a Huey. He was a machine gunner on a Huey or something. And if you talk to the guy, he'll tell you stories about mowing over yaks in a rice patty and going into caves with a flashlight in his mouth and a.44 pistol and stuff. But when you talk to their daughters, when you talk to these guys, they're like, yeah, he did something. I think he was a cook.
1:26:59🔗CallerYeah, he did something. I don't know. He's stupid.
1:27:02🔗AdamYeah, he always talks about it. I always I never listen when he talks about it. It turns out the guy was flying like F-4s off a carrier deck.
1:27:11🔗Alien Ant FarmA, maybe, maybe though she was right. And he really was just a cook.
1:27:16🔗AdamWell, it could be right. And he's probably BSing.
1:27:18🔗DrewYou aren't supposed to play an Alien Ant Farm song.
1:27:19🔗AdamOh yeah, let's do that. It's been it's been way too long.
1:30:44🔗DrewYeah, the dots, yeah. You don't see anything left of the road. Well, I gotta hear those little bub-bub-bub-bumps.
1:30:47🔗CallerYeah, he drives by Braille. That's what it is. He's a blind driver.
1:30:50🔗AdamAlien Ant Farm, our guest tonight. We're gonna take ourselves a break, and Alien Ant Farm is gonna hustle back to their hotel, because they wanna see themselves on The Tonight Show tonight, and I don't blame them.
1:32:20🔗AdamAnd you kiddies, we'll be talking to you in about 22 hours when we have Miss USA on the Loveline. I want to thank Alien Ant Farm for coming in here. Until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying, Mahalo.
1:32:35🔗CallerThis has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on the show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Engel. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.