3:17🔗
Adam
Hey, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew is a board-certified physician, addiction medicine specialist. Phone number, 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1, fax number, 310-854-4455. Can I give the part about you being an addiction medicine specialist?
3:37🔗
Adam
All right. Tonight, from The Blame Game, Jason Winer is here. Jason is from the MTV show, The Blame Game, the sort of teenage divorce court. We had Jason on the TV show, had a good time with him. Jason also is in a TV movie, King of the World, which I'm guessing is the Muhammad Ali story.
4:09🔗
Jason Winer
Yeah. A fellow tribesman. He was in the movie, The Best Man, played a role called Quentin. He stole the picture.
4:26🔗
Jason Winer
He really does. The first time he came up to me on the set, he was in costume, and he also did one of those things where he was sort of in character the whole time, which was a little bit annoying, but especially since Cassius Clay, now known as Muhammad Ali, Cassius Clay was well known for talking constantly and preaching and all sorts of stuff. It made us a little bit uncomfortable in the van traveling over from lunch.
4:54🔗
Jason Winer
But he wouldn't shut up. But when the camera rolled, man, that guy was there. I mean, I never met Muhammad Ali, obviously, but he-
5:09🔗
Jason Winer
Yeah. I play Robert Lipsight, who's the New York Times reporter who covered Clay throughout his career. Before the Howard Cosell days, this was the guy who was sort of in the inner circle.
5:24🔗
Drew
I was watching ESPN, they have those Friday Night Fights or whatever, and they were doing a year-end thing. It was right before the millennium, and they were interviewing some of these reporter types who follow fights. What an unusual, interesting, salty, fat, sort of-
5:40🔗
Drew
Smokey, little thin tie, white shirt, tie, had a skimbo. Just an interesting group of guys, and that's all they thought about was fights.
5:49🔗
Adam
And they would drive up to Arrowhead where the guy's camp was and try to get interviews and probably hang out there for a weekend or something like that.
5:59🔗
Drew
Imagine these guys eating like ham sandwiches and stuff, and that's all they could afford, and they didn't think about it.
6:05🔗
Adam
Well, I don't know. It was a, Jason can tell us, but it seemed it was a different time, and I guess a reporter was your only link to what was going on, and you saw it through his eyes or through his typewriter, and he had to go to wherever it was happening and sort of get the scoop.
6:22🔗
Jason Winer
Yeah, well, it was the early 60s, and there was definitely an establishment, a way you were supposed to write about sports, you know, and this guy, Robert Lipsight, was this young whippersnapper from the New York Times, and he was actually a feature writer. At the time, the movie focuses on the fight between Liston and Clay. It actually just takes it up to the point where he wins the championship and ends there.
6:46🔗
Jason Winer
Yeah, exactly. And so, the thing is that nobody thought Clay could win, nobody liked Clay. He was annoying, he talked too much, he scared America, he frightened everybody. Right. And nobody liked Liston, they thought he was a thug. So, basically, there was a quote in the paper, 190 million Americans voting for a double knockout, you know. So, this was the only guy that thought Clay had a shot, and he was the only guy that was sort of willing to buck the establishment and talk about some of the Muslim stuff that was going on in Clay's religion.
7:25🔗
Adam
Yeah, a lot of people refused to call him Muhammad Ali for a while. And Liston was like, yeah, an ex-felon, he did a little time in the joint. He was, didn't talk much, was kind of a thug. They thought maybe had some mob connections. Ended up dying in Vegas through sort of mysterious causes. Later on in life, no one quite ever got to the bottom of how he died, but there seemed to be a little foul play there. But he was going off as a six or eight to one favorite against Ali, if you could imagine that in their first fight. In their first fight, was that the Phantom Punch or was that something in his eye?
8:14🔗
Adam
Didn't come back. Said, accused, now was it Liston who accused Ali of putting something in his water bucket or something, his thingy's eye, or was it the other way around?
8:23🔗
Jason Winer
It was, Liston had something on his gloves. They think they put something on his gloves. Liston was getting beat up real bad in the first round. And it looked like he was definitely going to lose. And then somewhere in the fifth or sixth round, Ali starts to not be able to see. You can watch the tape and see it. He's squinting and then he goes crazy in his corner. Now we actually had Dundee, Angelo Dundee, who's the real trainer who trained him on the set. And he told us the story of Clay going nuts not being able to see. And he says, I dip my finger into his eye and then I put it in my own eye. And man, it burned like hell.
9:03🔗
Adam
You know, that was back in the day or just at the end of the time, you know, when you could put a horseshoe in your glove or ramp some barbed wire around it or crush some glass, you know, those are the good, you know, there's a time when boxing and wrestling sort of cross paths for a while. Now it's all on the up and up just ear biting and that kind of stuff. All right. We'll jump in, get some of these phone calls. So again, that's on the 10th. But let's get back to today. The Man Show is on at 1030, everybody. Oh, it's on right now, I'm told. Why? I don't know. I guess they're running two episodes tonight. And by the way, the Man Show is in some sort of TV guide insert, the official ballot for favorite shows of the year.
9:49🔗
Adam
Well, it's along with 180 other shows. So, CPO. Sharkey's underneath it for Christ's sake.
10:04🔗
Adam
I blew one of the editors of TV Guide. I have no idea how crap gets there. But usually, you're on the losing end of that, right? You're sitting around going, how come we're not on here?
10:34🔗
Drew
He was expressing himself last time when we were broadcasting on MTV. Now they're on radio listening to what he has to say.
10:40🔗
Adam
Oh, listen. Hold on. Let me just say something about MTV real quick. Oh, no. You can stop me if I'm out of line. MTV has never ran a Loveline promotion ever. Not a billboard, not a bus stop, not a commercial. They don't even run commercials on MTV for Loveline. Ever, never, never, ever, ever. They are cheap and horribly run, that company. I've never met anyone who's had any association with them, who said anything other than cheap and poorly run. Am I right, Drew? Thank you very much. That's right. You want to fire me? Go ahead, you pussies. They don't got the guts.
11:25🔗
Jason Winer
In MTV's defense, yes, they took us. We were untested. You guys are big radio stars. You know what I'm saying?
11:38🔗
Drew
Here is how, by the way, here's how that went down. You guys want to do this job or are we going to hire somebody else? That's how that went down.
12:02🔗
Adam
Well, they did put us on the air. We do have to give them credit for that. But that's the last time we saw them, isn't it?
12:15🔗
Adam
Okay, he's a good guy. I want everyone to close their eyes for just one second, for just one second. And in the four years or three and a half years that Loveline has been on MTV, you try to tell me if you've seen a commercial for Loveline or promo for Loveline or any page in any magazine, any billboard, anything. Hey, even during the 10 spot when they explain what's coming on next, they go through 14 shows.
12:41🔗
Adam
Don't mention Loveline. I've never done a thing with them or for them. I've never done a photo shoot or an ad campaign, nothing. Three and a half years, not even on their own network. It's bizarre. I don't think there's another, I can't think of another TV show on another network that is not advertised on their network. I want someone to show me a Loveline commercial in three and a half years. A 30, a 10 second spot hasn't been made, never showed it.
13:10🔗
Jason Winer
See, what we did is we built in a necessary advertisement in our concept. You know that the punishment for our show is you get your picture printed in Entertainment Weekly under the heading, Do Not Date This Blame Game Loser. So built into our budget is at least one ad in Entertainment Weekly promoting the show.
13:37🔗
Adam
Oh, no. They do. They're tireless in their self-promotion except for Loveline. But I'll take it as a compliment. I guess we don't need it.
13:49🔗
Adam
Right. Hold on. Let me ask you real quick. What did you get from them this year for Christmas?
14:15🔗
Adam
I'll tell you, they love their talent on that network. I got socks last year. Listen, I get more from my goddamn neighbor than I get from MTV. Cheap bastards.
14:32🔗
Caller
Yes. Before I go into my problem, I want to tell Adam something. I did see a spot for Loveline.
14:40🔗
Caller
And the 10th spot, they used to say coming up tonight. I'm like, if you watch it, like I watch like the real world, they say coming up at 12, Loveline with Dr. Drew and Adam.
15:06🔗
Caller
No, I think I'm confusing that because I know I saw a Loveline one. I think I'm confusing with that in the man show.
15:22🔗
Caller
All right. My question is, listen, I have a boyfriend and we're beginning going together for like a while now, like a month or two, and he's been saying to me like he's going to break up with me. He's like telling me, oh, why don't you get another boyfriend?
15:43🔗
He wants to have anal sex with me.
15:49🔗
Caller
He says he's been having anal sex, wants to have anal sex with me, and I've told him, I'm not into that. And he said, oh, maybe you should find yourself another boyfriend, you know, in conversation.
16:03🔗
Caller
Yeah, but the thing is that in the beginning, he was really nice to me, and we've got along. And now he's like, right now, he's like turned completely out of it.
16:33🔗
Adam
Let's just go out to the woods so I can stroke your long blonde hair. Yes, sure. Before he beat him with an axe handle and sonomized him, he was a real pleasant guy. Hey, Hitler wasn't too bad at the beginning. You can never... No one is going to let you do what you want to do if you tell them what you're going to do before they let you in the door. You know what I mean? You got to get into the house in order to ransack the place. And if you sit out on the street and yell, come in, I'm going to burn the house. Let me in. I'm going to burn the house. They're not going to let you in.
17:04🔗
Jason Winer
Basically, this guy gives you a whole bunch of candy upfront. Then he slowly takes away the candy and asks for anal sex. And you think about it in hopes of maybe getting some of the candy back.
17:15🔗
Adam
All right. Now that's my analogy. I was going to use the candy anal sex analogy. I was going to actually use the candy corn anal sex analogy that I always use. You know, Drew?
17:27🔗
Adam
Oh, Jason, you're pissing me off, man. I know you listen to the show and you come right back at me. Devon?
17:33🔗
Hey, Adam?
17:45🔗
I turn him on, man.
17:52🔗
Adam
Thank you. Turn off the radio and turn the man show on, Comedy Central. Real network, everybody.
17:58🔗
Caller
It's cool. Anyway, I stopped smoking marijuana on New Year's Eve and ever since. I've just been incredibly depressed and I was wondering how.
18:10🔗
Drew
How long? Yes, you need to be. You should be supervised by a doctor who's used to treating marijuana addiction because this actually can become very serious.
18:19🔗
Caller
Well, I'm on probation. I was using for about a month every day before that. But before that, I was using every day.
18:28🔗
Adam
We have the world's dumbest scholars on this show. I was like, how long you've been doing heroin? Well, I've been doing it for about the last month, but then before the last month, I did for 18 years. So I was like, 18 years in a month? Yeah, but I got busted a month ago, but then before I did it for 14 years. I was like, okay, so let me see if I can figure this out.
19:00🔗
Drew
I have had patients commit suicide with marijuana withdrawal depressions. They are profound.
19:08🔗
Drew
I wasn't even, no, it wasn't that kind of a relationship. I was actually advising an organization where the guy was sinking.
19:25🔗
Drew
Go to MA, you can get some support there. You'll find out lots of other people go through exactly what you're going through.
19:38🔗
What's up?
19:40🔗
Caller
I'm currently married and I have a four-year-old son. My wife works at a preschool, the preschool my son attends. We went to a Christmas party before Christmas, and I sat next to my son's teacher, which is separate from my wife.
20:02🔗
Well, yeah.
20:28🔗
Caller
She's just perfect. We were talking. She was flirting around with me a little bit. Well, ever since then, I have not been able to get her out of my mind. We had another function around Christmas with that preschool. I'm not really sure what to do here because I am married.
20:52🔗
Drew
The last person I dealt with, what can you do? Just for the comedy's sake or for curiosity's sake, the last guy I dealt with that was severely obsessional like this, they're then idealizing this person, the most wonderful person I've ever worked with there, an alcoholic dad who left in a flurry when he was eight. Is there any history like that with you?
21:48🔗
Adam
All right. I'm about done with you, Derek. I can't. We get less mileage per syllable in this show than any other goddamn show in the air. We absolutely, we do more talk and less answer and then, I mean, less being heard. If this was Morris Code, the guy's hand would break off. Do you know what I mean? Before you even got, hello, how are you out? It's, do you get along well with your wife? Well, my wife and I don't see each other that much because I work at night and she works during the day. So how do you like your wife? Oh, we get along okay. Why'd you marry her? How come you married her? What? Why'd you marry her? Who? Your wife. Why? I mean, it's really, it's like talking to Jaime the Robot talking to our listeners. It just drives me insane. We can't get anywhere. I don't know if they're not listening or I'm just pissed off all the time or I don't.
22:50🔗
Jason Winer
I have a quick theory. I think this guy is suffering from the, you know, your typical grass is greener syndrome.
23:00🔗
Jason Winer
It's kind of a theory on a theory. I don't know if that's confusing, but the idea is that-
23:05🔗
Jason Winer
Go ahead. When you're in a relationship, right, you always feel like everybody's flirting with you. You feel like you got a real shot.
23:11🔗
Drew
Well, that's the only time they ever do flirt with you when you're actually not available.
23:19🔗
Adam
No, no. I'm somewhere in between you two. Women do respond to guys who are spoken for because women are stupid. It's just like we spoke the other night about like diamonds. Women are the only people on earth who want diamonds because somebody is jacked up this inflated the value of some rock, and now they all want a rock that's bigger than their friend's rock. And, you know, meanwhile, you got to spend 20 grand on it. But I may not have articulated myself as well as I could have. But basically what I'm saying is this. Women, a man, if a man sees a beautiful, beautiful woman, he wants her to be single so he can jump on top of her. Women, they respond to someone who's connected with somebody.
24:09🔗
Adam
He must be okay. He must have something. Right. But I'll let you continue with your theory because I don't think that's solely it. I think it's somewhere in between.
24:18🔗
Jason Winer
It's a combination of things. But then, so you fantasize about being able to be with somebody, but you're comforted by the fact that you really can't act on it. So you're free to fantasize. Like this guy is free to idealize this woman. But the second he's single and he would actually be free to pursue her, he's going to feel the sting of not being able to get her.
24:44🔗
Adam
Well, yeah, there's two possible scenarios here. One is she ain't going to be interested in him.
24:51🔗
Adam
No, I highly doubt it. A number two, three weeks into it, he finds out she's had two abortions and her uncle jumped on her or something. And it turns out his friend, Lou, nailed her before he went to the service four years ago. And then she just becomes another one who, then he spots someone else who's a little greener.
25:16🔗
Adam
That's how it works. So unless that guy's got a four year old, for Christ's sake. Come on.
25:34🔗
Caller
Well, I don't actually expose flesh. But as I was telling your screener, what I normally do like restaurants, usually a good restaurant like a Denny's or something. You know, I'll go to a great coffee.
25:50🔗
Caller
And I'll wear some pants that are somewhat rebuilding like maybe a pair of white pants, nothing underneath.
26:04🔗
Caller
Well, like, you know, I try to be at an angle, you know, where I'm setting. I'm like, you know, cross from the girl. Right.
26:22🔗
Adam
That is a retard with a lot of energy. That's a retard with an ego. Egotard. That's who calls this show egotards. These are retarded folks with inflated egos. See, most of the time, retarded guys are like, you give them something shiny to look at and tell them they did a good job. You see the Special Olympics, right? You give them a little paddle with the ball on the end of it. They're happy for a year. But we have the e-guitard, which is the most dangerous breed because it has the intelligence of the retard, yet the ego of an NBA All-Star forward.
27:06🔗
Adam
All right. It has wings and it cramps on radio shows. We're going to take ourselves a little break and we'll be back after this.
27:51🔗
Adam
I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew over there. Phone number 1-800-L-A-V-E-1-9-1. Jason Winer's here tonight. He is from The Blame Game, Monday through Friday, 5.30 on MTV. Also, you can find him coming up on the 10th. That's...
28:06🔗
Adam
Monday night movie, The King of the World. That's the Muhammad Ali story, Nine O'Clock. And boy, there's a Muhammad Ali movie coming out.
28:19🔗
Jason Winer
Because of the TV movie and all that. I think they're reconsidering. I don't know. They're waiting to see.
28:26🔗
Adam
I know when We Were Kings came out a couple of years ago, a documentary and all that. But then there was the Muhammad Ali song. Muhammad, Muhammad Ali. I don't remember that. He floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee. Muhammad, the Black Superman. Hell yes. I wonder if the real Superman is pissed. That was probably 1975. Wow. 76, 75. Yeah. No, no. How come I know stuff, Drew? Where were you?
29:05🔗
Drew
I was just going to say it must have been 76 because that's when I left the culture of this planet.
29:17🔗
Adam
Drew works like this. I mentioned something that everyone else should know, such as the magician Doug Hanning.
29:25🔗
Adam
Drew's never heard of him. Then I say, sure, you know Doug Hanning, he was real hot in 1970, and then fill in the blank, 71, 79, could be 85, whatever it is. Whatever. Then Drew says, whatever a date I say, well sure, 1970, fill in the blank, 1980, fill in the blank, 1990, fill in the blank. Sure, during that time, I was going through my fill in the blank, and that's why he doesn't know. As if 70 through 85 was my, lock myself at home, read the newspaper, watch TV time. No one else left the house, Drew, please. Still yet, yet we seem to know who Doug Henning is.
30:31🔗
Adam
That's right. Oh, okay. It's just, it's just, you're sickening me. Get out of the studio. Do the rest of the show from the car. Bill?
30:45🔗
Caller
Well, you know, I heard, uh, I'm trying to hurry, I was trying to hurry because I'm really, I'm at work actually.
30:56🔗
Adam
Okay, so good. Bill, uh, is a guy who's not really an exhibitionist. I mean, he doesn't show flesh, but he will put on some cycling shorts and go into an upscale place like a Denny's, maybe an Arby's or Sambo's, and sit down and show the ladies what he has.
31:12🔗
Caller
Right. And, you know, and I basically, you know, I just wait to see what kind of reaction, you know, a lot of times it's positive, you know, I mean, sometimes girls who might, you know, like if they're wearing a dress, that's usually ones I focus in on. Sure. Yeah. You know, usually, you know, they sometimes they might show just a little more thigh or, or they might put the tongue and cheek, you know, and make the little motion there.
31:40🔗
Adam
I mean, you spot a guy who's, I'll tell you, there's nothing turns the ladies on more than incredibly tight slacks, really clingy tight white slacks with no underpants on, you know, where they can really see the outline of your penis through the pants. Oh, yeah. And when they spot that from across the restaurant, I don't care if they're out with their fiancee. They're going to give you a look, and then they're going to give you the oral sex motion, where they put the fist up to the hand and they take the tongue and oh.
32:13🔗
Caller
But you see them, you know, like, they might lick their lips or, like I said, they just might make the motion. And like I said, you know, I...
32:20🔗
Adam
Let me translate all this. They're staring at a pile of pancakes trying to eat. They reach for the maple syrup and Bill takes that, is a very strong message.
32:40🔗
Adam
Bill, what kind of wheels do you have? What kind of car do you drive? Because I know the lady's like that.
32:57🔗
Oh my God.
33:38🔗
Caller
Well, basically, like I said, since I'm not actually shown any flash, you know, can I actually get busted?
33:49🔗
Drew
No, but you could be, you know, you could be asked to leave establishment for harassing behavior.
33:53🔗
Adam
No, I got to tell you, my only worry if I was a guy like Bill was that I've got, that I get enough women heated up to such a degree that I'm pounced on in the parking lot. Right. Brows flying, hair pulling, you know what I mean? I mean, Bill, women can be like sharks and work into a frenzy.
34:15🔗
Adam
Yeah. It's important to sort of know your environment and just do not show, you know, that kind of scrotal bulb in an upscale Denny type establishment.
34:29🔗
Adam
I love to, boy, it's fascinating to me, like what goes on in people's minds as opposed to what really goes on in life and society, isn't there?
34:40🔗
Adam
And I guess, isn't that, if you really think about it, isn't that the definition of sanity? Everybody has a little of their own thing, a little of their own ass going on in their own head, little of their own drama, little of their own mantra, whatever's going on in their own head. And most people, they're 5, 8, 10% off of what really is going on out there. But when you're insane, you're 90% off.
35:10🔗
Adam
I'd say. This guy was in like the mid-high 80s. Out of reality. In terms of what was going on in his head as opposed to what was going on. The ladies looking across, licking their lips, showing a little leg. Oh my God.
35:27🔗
Adam
You're right. You're absolutely right. You keep this up, Jason's going to get your picture in the entertainment weekly.
35:39🔗
I met this girl in a college class. She's from Germany. We were working together in a group project thing, and we started hitting it off. But one of the things I noticed as I saw her right before the break was she has like really hairy armpits.
36:01🔗
And so I'm just kind of wondering if I hit it up with this chick, how can I ask her to, you know, shave that?
36:11🔗
Adam
And you got to do the math. If she's got the hairy armpits, she's probably wearing like three Merkins down the stairs.
36:19🔗
Well, you know what, in shorts once, her legs were not hairy.
36:23🔗
Jason Winer
Well, I think you could go subtly positive. You know what I mean? You're like, oh, I really, you know, I like touching you here. I just, I wish it was smooth. I don't know. That sounded really disgusting. Really awful.
36:36🔗
Drew
I think you have to be really explicit if it's somebody you're involved with, not right away, but eventually. You have to say, this is just not something in my culture.
36:46🔗
Yeah.
36:53🔗
No. Let's just be her thing.
36:58🔗
It seems like it might be a foreign thing, a European thing.
37:09🔗
I assume so.
37:10🔗
Adam
All right. Well, listen, just begin dating her. See if you get to the point where you have to bring it up. Okay?
37:23🔗
Jason Winer
It's a... To me, I have kind of an armpit thing, believe it or not, if I can come clean about that right here.
37:41🔗
Jason Winer
Yeah. And you know, I don't mind the hairy armpit as a political statement. I've got nothing against it. It's just not a it's not. It becomes decidedly less attractive when her suit.
37:52🔗
Adam
My my thing. My thing about women in general is I want them to look as far away from a man as possible. That's my approach. That's why I like the big cans. Because you don't have that. No. No. Man has no no breasts or at least a lot of guys don't have breasts. Right. And I see this is what I want in a woman. I want a woman to look whatever guy has. I want them not to have. A will start with the penis. Let's just start right with the penis. That's A number one. Then it goes to scrotum. Then you start. Then you go to breast. You want the breast, not the flesh. Then you start getting into arm hair, underarm hair, leg hair. But ultimately, when you really think about it, you want them to be the antithesis of you. And that's what I'm looking for.
39:02🔗
Drew
When we come back, I want to talk about I got attacked again by these people who apparently as a whole organization that claimed we talked about RU-486 last night.
39:27🔗
Adam
We'll take a break and we'll come back. I forgot about that, Drew. All right. What the hell is going on here? Yes, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. That is Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. I'm holding, by the way, Jason Miners here, Winer, sorry, from The Blame Game, 530 on, what is that? MTV. Yeah. Monday through Friday. Also, King of the World, which is the Muhammad Ali story, which will be in the Monday Night Movie on ABC, 9 o'clock. Let's not forget those official ballots for the TV Guide.
40:45🔗
Adam
No, don't bother with that nonsense. But the man show you want to check off is in the favored new series category. By the way, there's some movies called, I mean, there's some series, one called Farscape.
41:05🔗
Adam
It's funny, I was standing in an office with Stone and Stanley, the Loveline and Man Show producers. These guys, they read the tabloids, I mean, sorry, the trade papers, probably the tabloids too. Actually, they masturbate to the tabloids, but they read the trades and Daniel, the Man Show producer and a bunch of other TV people, and I said, Farscape and nobody in the room could come up with it. I thought, well, if none of these people can come up with it, and I don't know what the hell it is, how the hell they get on here? How does that work? Well, anyway.
41:42🔗
Adam
Please, please, please. It's the runaway hit of the new season. Of course, Shasta McNancy is on here as well. WWF SmackDown, Roswell judging Amy, a bunch of other duds. So again, the man shows. What you check off when you get that balance. Josh?
42:01🔗
Yeah.
42:05🔗
Caller
What's going on, guys? Hey. Me and my friends were wondering, like, we've all tried to find the G-spot. Like on all our girlfriends.
42:15🔗
Caller
And like we've read in books that like it doesn't exist, and in other books it says it does. I mean, we just all really want to know if it really exists at all.
42:24🔗
Adam
All right. Every, everything I ever hear about the G-spot and the way to get to it is, it's, you know, you go in the vagina and you go up.
42:52🔗
Adam
I've not met too many of those gals, although I haven't met many gals, you know, just period. But listen, here's the deal with this G-spot nonsense. You do a good job on the Clitoris in your home free. You don't have to worry about the G-spot. You understand? And let me tell you something, Josh. All women want is oral sex and jewelry. And both sometimes.
43:23🔗
Adam
Well, some will, but you got to really give a lot of jewelry with the oral sex, which don't they want to give back. Listen, Josh, let me give you a tip, because you're young and your tongue is low mileage. But I'm going to save you a lot of time. Perform the oral sex and don't go too crazy on them. Take it nice and slow.
44:07🔗
Adam
Yeah, that's right. That's right. It wasn't such a bad movie, you know, everyone makes fun of it. It wasn't that bad. I was all right with that. It was kind of fun.
44:20🔗
Adam
Yeah, it was like 30 million worth of entertainment for a $145 million movie or whatever the hell it was. But I don't go into it. For me, as long as the $145 million, you know, they don't prorate the cost of the ticket.
44:36🔗
Adam
If I'm using, I'm probably not using the term right. The point is, yeah, I don't pay $63 just because the movie was $145 million.
44:46🔗
Adam
If you're stupid enough to spend $145 million on a movie, you're still going to charge me seven bucks. Right. I'm stupid enough to want to spend my seven bucks on the Blair Witch project, which was 15 grand. You know what I'm saying? That's why I go to the expensive one. To me, it's not about entertainment, it's about value.
45:08🔗
Adam
I mean, anyone can be entertained, but what about value? Victoria? Yes. You're 19 years old. Yes. Seriously, if your ticket had to do with a percentage of the movie cost, it'd be a problem. What the hell would that be like Blair Witch is supposed to? Is it?
45:43🔗
Caller
You're welcome. Okay. My question is, okay, I'm bisexual but my boyfriend, he knows it but he's never seen me be involved with a girl. And the other, about Tuesday of last week, he had come home from work early and me and my girlfriend were together. And he walked into the bedroom and it was weird because everybody just like stopped. Everybody was just looking at each other. Our mouths were like on the floor. We were just like, and it was just nobody said a word. And then all of a sudden he just like takes off his clothes, jumps in and we have this like big huge threesome.
46:38🔗
Wow.
46:45🔗
Caller
Well, no, it's not that. I'm, I'm kind of torn because I, I told him that sometime in the future, I would want to have a threesome with a girl and he said, that's fine. But this was like months ago and I thought he had totally forgotten about it because I had. And after this happened, I've been totally uncomfortable with him.
47:05🔗
Drew
What do you think the probability is, Adam, that the guy had forgotten about that promise?
47:09🔗
Adam
I know, huh? Alright. So, Victoria, let me just make sure I got this straight. He came home from work early.
47:24🔗
Adam
And then he got off at 605, 606 again? Yes. And so he walks in. You guys are having sex. Yes. By the way, the only people I've ever seen having sex, I sort of stumbled across, was my dad, you know, when I was 11 or something. Where? I saw his hairy ass. You know, the door was cracked open. I was heading down the hall. I mean, you know, yeah. Yeah. I didn't want to join in, but what are you going to do? Hey, there's a certain protocol. I didn't see anything. You know, it's just like, you know, I heard some noise.
47:58🔗
Drew
I've never heard you talk about this before. Did your stepmom know about this? She doesn't know.
48:02🔗
Adam
Yeah, I sent her a card every year, you idiot. No, I didn't see anything. It was just, you know, the door was cracked open. I heard noises, you know. But the point is, it wasn't my hot 18-year-old girlfriend with her bisexual friend that was getting it on.
49:01🔗
Hold on.
49:04🔗
Adam
That's it. I was thinking about it five minutes ago, but now it's a done deal. We got to- It's a long break, right, Anderson? I'm going to go out to the car. That's why I got the windows tinted. We're going to take a little break, and then we're going to come back to Victoria and figure out how the anal sex with the girlfriend-
49:29🔗
Let's have some more fun.
50:08🔗
Adam
Love Line, we gotta take a quick ten second timeout. We'll be back with more of the show in just ten seconds.
50:29🔗
Adam
It is Loveline. I'm Adam Corolla. He is Dr. Drew, phone number 1-800-L-O-V-E-1-9-1. Jason Winer is here from The Blame Game, Monday through Friday, 5.30 on MTV. And also coming up this Monday, the 9 o'clock ABC Movie of the Week. Yeah. Yeah, that's right. King of the World. Muhammad Ali story. All right, so when we left off, we're speaking to Victoria. She's 19. Her fiancee came home early from work, caught her with another gal, Get It On. He never met this other gal, stood at the door, dumbfounded for a beat or two, looked down at the penis, penis looked up at him, the scrotum shrugged, and they dove in.
51:14🔗
Drew
You know what's amazing? Do you remember last night across the top of the air, what we were talking about?
51:21🔗
Drew
From the exhibitionist a half hour ago to the 400 pound woman with the 97 pound ovarian tumor. Which we crossed the top of the air with last night.
51:35🔗
Drew
I just was going through the forum, the drdrew.com where there's lots of discussion about her. Oh, really? Some a-hole writes, Adam is great in every single forum. Did you put that up?
52:12🔗
Adam
And is this the first time he'd ever laid eyes on her? Because, see, to me, this has got to be some sort of sodomy record.
52:20🔗
Adam
Do you know what I mean? Like, the average time from the time you meet somebody or just see somebody to the time you actually sodomize them is like six months, 27 days, and 14 hours, 32 minutes. I think that's like the average.
52:44🔗
Adam
The point is, this guy was in the back door within 10 minutes after he actually spotted her.
52:50🔗
Jason Winer
Did they even exchange a sentence? Was there any verbal communication whatsoever?
52:59🔗
Adam
Who did he start in on first? Shut Drew's mic. I've had enough of him. And keep it off for tomorrow night, too. Hey, Victoria?
53:36🔗
She didn't.
53:41🔗
Adam
Oh, hello? Oh, boy. No, that was her friend. That was her friend goofing off. I don't think it was her mom. Two nights ago, or was it last week? Last week, I was like a 17-year-old girl called them. You know, see, what happens on this show is, especially with some of the affiliates, if they're calling in to the show live and there's a two or three hour time difference, it's two in the morning when they're calling in. And they're 17, so they're always like, yeah, my boyfriend. So they're in the room obviously with the quilt pulled over their head while their parents are sleeping down the hall. So last week, girl calls in, she goes, she's in a room, she lights off, she's got the comforter pulled up, she goes, the other night, I was giving my boyfriend a rim-jacket. Oh, good night, oh, good night.
54:52🔗
Adam
No, Anderson doesn't have that. That'd be good radio. All right. Let's keep moving ahead here, Drew.
54:58🔗
All right.
54:58🔗
Adam
Drew, stop preoccupying with yourself and your own website and start picking some calls. Stanley? Hey. You're 17.
55:07🔗
Adam
Drew, stop with the marking. Stop with the marking. You can hear it on the radio. Say that every night and every night you do it. Stanley, go ahead.
55:19🔗
Caller
And then the reason I called you is actually I'm kind of scared out of my mind right now. All right. My girlfriend is on the pill and we try to use condoms almost every time but we've slipped a few times, you know. We figured it would be okay.
55:54🔗
Caller
Okay. Then one of the side effects, you know, she has a really regular period, like she can pretty much mark the day it starts. Well, this time around, she was a day late and now she's got a flow that is like, I guess she said it's like if the old one was Niagara Falls, then this is like a raindrop. Oh, well. And when she took out the tampon, it was like not the right color. She said it was like black instead of red.
56:38🔗
Jason Winer
If anything, be worried about your girlfriend. Maybe there's something, I mean, it doesn't sound like she's pregnant, but maybe she's.
56:44🔗
Caller
I can't, I called in sick to work, and I'm going to drag her to the doctor on Friday. For what? Just to see if she's okay, because I mean, off, it could be off, couldn't she?
56:59🔗
Drew
No, many women have very dark, will be very dark when they take their tampon off. She's having a light flow.
57:05🔗
Drew
She'll leave it in longer because it's light. It will turn dark while it's in there a longer period of time.
57:10🔗
Adam
Right. God bless Stanley for being so concerned. Yeah. I saw the Valtrex kickboxing commercial today.
57:19🔗
Adam
Yeah. My favorite ad. Have you seen this, Jason? This Valtrex is a genital herpes suppression medication.
57:29🔗
Adam
She is kickboxing. It's like a five-minute commercial. She's working out, she's kickboxing, she's swimming in the pool, she's running, then it's back to kickboxing again. She has her own personal trainer, and then the guy shows up. That's her man. And that's saying, you know what? I may have genital herpes, but you know what?
57:51🔗
Jason Winer
What I love about those commercials are the long lists of side effects spoken very quickly at the end of the commercials.
57:57🔗
Adam
That's right, rectal bleeding and rectal discharge. If you're pregnant, if you have hair, if you're over 5'5, if you live in an urban center, if you drive an SUV, it's like-
58:09🔗
Adam
Right, right. Yeah, and it's great. Yeah, it's great when they talked about rectal discharge and stuff like that. Meanwhile, yeah, the girls gathering wildflowers. Yeah, and I've yelled at Drew many, many a time about this, which is I understand this country is run by a bunch of screwball lawyers, and now we have to say everything. But I don't really want to hear, like I'm sitting and I'm eating. And I'm hearing about, first off, it's a medication that I'm not interested in because I don't possess whatever it is it's made for. Number two, I then have to hear about all the horrible side effects that may go with the medication that I'm not interested in. And I think to myself, you know what? Just tell the person when they get the goddamn medication about the goddamn side effects. Don't, would you have to list everything in a commercial? Do you know what I mean? Like when you sell a card, do you have to explain that you could get into an accident? I mean, look at cars, by the way. You know what I love? I love the car commercials. Here's one that drives me insane. They have the car commercials and they have these wild car commercials, this VW commercial, this Jetta or Passat or whatever commercial, where it's like a 70s cop spoof and the cops are chasing someone and they look at this powder blue sports car, then they look at a guy on a motorcycle, then the guy pulls up in the Jetta and they all jump in. And it's kind of streets of San Francisco and the guy's getting air, jumping over cable cars and whatnot. And there's that thing that runs at the bottom, professional driver, closed road. Do not try this.
59:42🔗
Adam
Is there really, could a case be made if they didn't run that and I went and bought a new Volkswagen and tried to jump it down at the Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco that I could then sue the manufacturer for showing it on the commercial? I mean, do we have to distill things down that far? Do you know what I mean? Does every single car commercial that shows a car winding down a road or going through some pylons out in the desert, do we have to have that disclaimer that this is a special stunt driver and that this is a closed course or can we just watch the goddamn car on the road? Do you know what I mean? Is it really going to be a case that's going to be made? It drives me insane. It would drive me insane if I was making the commercial.
1:00:30🔗
Drew
Here's what drives me nuts is not only do you get that at the commercial, you get the sheet of microfiche, which is everything, every time your heart beats, something could happen and the pharmacist is then required to give like a fact sheet and some labels on the medicine on top of that. The translation of those sheets are for your doctor. What they say is when you look at it for the doctor is, the sky is blue, the sky is blue, the sky is blue, the sky is blue, and the patient come back and go, Doctor, you didn't tell me the sky is blue.
1:01:02🔗
Adam
Right. Okay. Listen, yes, if you're going to print so small that it can't be read without an electron microscope, then what use is the print on the back of the ad, the magazine ad for the Valtrax is the list where they take the script from Barry Lyndon and they distill it down to the backside of one time magazine page. You guys like my Barry Lyndon reference?
1:01:29🔗
Adam
That's right. It's a four-hour movie. Thank you very much. Oh, the crew was actually out of the house when that movie was in the theater.
1:01:54🔗
And we went to a party.
1:02:17🔗
But we were all naked.
1:02:19🔗
Adam
Hey, why wasn't there any sexual contact, man? I mean, talk about not being able to close a deal. You got a bunch of chicks drunk and naked in a hot tub on New Year's Eve. You don't grab any crotch?
1:02:57🔗
Adam
You couldn't get a clear tally of them? Seriously, how many women did you get back to that hot tub?
1:03:03🔗
Three.
1:03:07🔗
Yeah. And we brought three back.
1:04:02🔗
Jason Winer
Well, I had had the flu, so I hadn't drank a drop of alcohol for four weeks, at least.
1:04:11🔗
Jason Winer
So, you know, I'm with a bunch of friends. We're making a big dinner. I started drinking wine. It was New Year's Eve, you know, big deal. Then we're toasting during dinner. And by then, I'm just totally sloshed. About five of midnight, the spins hit. About as the countdown was happening at number five, I was curled over the toilet. By 1206, I was passed out.
1:04:39🔗
Jason Winer
I made it to the bed. Well, I threw up once during the countdown and once during old langsine.
1:05:44🔗
Drew
Hang on one second, Matt. I think our age is finally getting to us because it seems to me, Adam, we had this discussion last New Year's Eve.
1:05:51🔗
Drew
And I think we got a response and said, oh, okay, and here we are when you're later going. I really don't remember that. I think so.
1:05:59🔗
Adam
See, that's why you got to smoke pot because every day is a new day. It's fresh. I tell high school football stories. I swore I've never shared with anyone before. It's great.
1:06:10🔗
Drew
In fact, I watched an episode of Loveline tonight that we filmed like about three weeks ago.
1:06:16🔗
Adam
Couldn't remember a thing. It probably means you're going to get paid for it either. Don't say anything. MTV finds out you don't get paid. You don't get paid for the ones you remember. All right. If anyone knows what old Leng Zine means, they should call us too. Matt?
1:06:32🔗
Caller
Okay. My question is, whenever I get an erection, it gets so hard. There's so much pressure that it's painful.
1:06:41🔗
Caller
Well, if I have sex three times a day for a week and a half, then it subsides. But other than that, yeah.
1:07:02🔗
Jason Winer
What if you're on a long flight or something, someplace where it's hard to get privacy?
1:07:06🔗
Adam
You've got to wait for the seatbelt light to go off before you can, like I do. Matt? Yeah. Do you have a girlfriend?
1:07:21🔗
Caller
Well, kind of. Whenever we're done having sex, I don't go soft. She has to leave the bed and be gone for like 20 minutes before I can get out of bed, before I'll just return to normal.
1:07:55🔗
Adam
Do you think you're real horny as well as having a penis that's very functional that way?
1:08:02🔗
Drew
You're not on like hormone supplements for athletics or anything? You've never been sexually abused. You're not a sexual compulsive, per se.
1:08:12🔗
Adam
All right. Well, don't worry. Matt, one day you won't be able to get an erection no matter what the cost.
1:08:18🔗
Caller
I was just wondering if there's something I could do to make it subside, because it is uncomfortable.
1:08:28🔗
Drew
Yeah. I mean, the serotonin reuptake inhibitors like Prozac, Zoloft will reduce some of that.
1:08:35🔗
Drew
Here is where women get very upset when men look at their sexuality as an excrement. I mean, he has an excrement. He needs to unburden a couple of times a day.
1:08:49🔗
Drew
There's something that needs to come out of their body. I mean, women get very, that somehow men are being crass when they talk about them.
1:08:57🔗
Adam
When men look at semen as excrement, then the vagina becomes the toilet, basically. I mean, do the man.
1:09:08🔗
Drew
A certain amount of male sexual activity is about just unburdening the system. It has to be done.
1:09:13🔗
Adam
Yeah. There's a certain amount of sperm turnover that needs to take place with men. And unfortunately, that has then bled into many other aspects of life. That's why we have hair pieces and sports cars. That's why there's jewelry and expensive restaurants. That's why there's greeting cards. That's why the floral industry stays in business every year. It's all bled into a million different facets of life. It's why skyscrapers are more than two stories. It really, I think, is sort of a supercharged society. That one simple biological event, which is we have, our testicles are like some sort of sperm warehouse. We have a high overhead, and we have to keep the product moving through it. We cannot afford to let it sit there.
1:10:11🔗
Adam
I mean, it's an interesting concept, and I know we're not the first to come up with it, and I don't want to distill it down to its lowest common denominator, but basically men need to keep sperm moving through their urethra. I don't know if it's God or biology or both.
1:10:33🔗
Drew
It's not just like there's a buildup, like having that bowel movement or something. There's that and this drive that it has.
1:10:42🔗
Adam
Right. It will always backfire, by the way. It's like, let's come up with a religion to stop you from inhaling.
1:10:50🔗
Adam
It is not going to work for long. But then, all the things that then come from that are, you know, gymnasiums and Grecian formula for the hair and bell bottoms and, you know, calf implants and tweezers and alcohol. It's all sort of a, it all emanates from that one, what they would call in, like in the doctors, you would call like the first person to get aids would be patient zero or whatever zero. And it all just goes from there, like a big ugly tree. All right, let's keep going. Ben?
1:11:31🔗
Yes.
1:11:37🔗
Caller
All right. Yes, it's an adverb and apparently it's Scottish, and it means long ago or long since. And then the noun version of it is time long past, actually.
1:11:56🔗
Caller
Yes. And Adam, I love The Man Show. I marked it down on my TV guide that I got today.
1:12:02🔗
Caller
And actually, I saw you guys on an old sitcom today. It's called like Fired Up or something like that.
1:12:13🔗
Adam
They canceled that show before that show aired. It must have went to some kind of syndication or something.
1:12:51🔗
Adam
Yeah, I think it's Lea Remini, by the way. But that's close enough. Yeah. Yeah, who's now in...
1:13:12🔗
Adam
Anytime I hear about verb, adverb, or noun, or whatever, I have to immediately go back to the schoolhouse rock commercials to try to get a bearing. That's how poor my education is. I literally, when people go, it's a verb, I go, I swear to God, I sit there and go, I do my thing in action. Verb, to run, to jump. Okay, verb. Yeah. I mean, that's how I do it. It's like when people go-
1:13:35🔗
Drew
You should see your face, your eyes are kind of rolled back, you start spinning though.
1:13:38🔗
Adam
If someone says, where is R in the alphabet? I go, I'll tell you. ABCDEFGHQR. Q, R. Yeah, after Q. Yeah. I mean, I have to run through the entire thing. Does everyone have to do that?
1:13:57🔗
Adam
Yeah. I'm a tar, but you know what an adverb is at least. All right. Listen, Drew, we got to look into this.
1:14:06🔗
Drew
It's a sitcom that was on the air last year. I think it was two years ago. It got canceled just as they filmed our episode. The next week it got canceled.
1:14:23🔗
Adam
Yeah. Okay. I'm going to talk to you guys about something off the air. Which is. What? I just want to say and then we'll get to break. It's not that interesting. But I always had this theory and we talked about this on the air that once you got into the business, when you did something magically, you saw it. You got a tape. If there's an interview with you in some magazine, you would see the magazine. And whenever I watch TV, anytime before I was on TV, and I'd see a guy, as Charlton Heston would be sitting across from Johnny Carson and be talking about his new movie, and he'd say, Johnny, I've actually not seen the movie. And I'd always think, oh, come on. That's nonsense. Of course you've seen it. Of course you've seen the movie you're in. Of course you've seen the TV show.
1:15:11🔗
Adam
The TV show. You know what, I thought it was so much sort of BS. Humility Hollywood style, but I now realize that after not only seeing anything that I've made, but being even alerted that we're on it, we've got to have some 14 year old listener call in and tell us we're on a show. We wouldn't have known, right?
1:15:28🔗
Adam
All right. Jason Winer is here from The Blame Game, also from the Muhammad Ali story, and we'll take ourselves a little break. We'll be back after this.
1:16:13🔗
Adam
Nick, it's the Loveline. Jason Winer is our guest from The Blame Game. 5.30, Monday through Friday on MTV. Also, King of the World, which is the Muhammad Ali story. Monday night, ABC, 9 o'clock, coming up this Monday. All right, now, where the hell were we? Where are we going here, Drew?
1:16:36🔗
Oh, hello?
1:16:38🔗
Caller
That's right. Okay. Um, I have no sexual, um, drive. Like, I masturbate, like, I guess, out of habit. I don't know why. Every single day. And I get no pleasure out of it. Yeah. And then, like, my boyfriend, like, wants me to have sex, well, I'll have sex with him, but it, like, doesn't please me at all.
1:17:19🔗
We gave it to you.
1:17:29🔗
Jason Winer
Just for these sorts of situations so that you could see a more attractive wallet pulled out when you take his money.
1:17:37🔗
Adam
Drew, I'll believe you if you tell me you got me this. I can't remember who gave me this wallet.
1:17:42🔗
Adam
It's nice. It smells like leather and ass. It's a nice combo. Actually, this side, leather, this side, ass, leather, ass, leather. Hairy ass. You want to touch it? No, no.
1:18:25🔗
Adam
Pompadour. Thank you. That's what I was trying to think of. All right. Let's do a little gambling on Kiki over here. She's 14. She masturbates chronically, although has no feeling. I'm going to go first. Sexual molestation.
1:18:42🔗
Adam
She's 14 now? I say she was 15 and a half. I say it happens in the future. You can't argue with that.
1:19:10🔗
Jason Winer
I'm going to go with, can I do uncle slash neighbor? Are they the same category?
1:19:18🔗
Jason Winer
I'm going to go with neighbor then. And I will say a little bit older, nine, eight or nine.
1:19:52🔗
Caller
When I was eight, I was raped by a gang. Oh my God. When I was nine to twelve by my cousins.
1:20:03🔗
Drew
Best friend's dad. The original damage is two to five and that's what sets the stage for him.
1:20:20🔗
Adam
Yeah. I mean that. I couldn't be happier. I really couldn't. Yeah. I wish he had the heart attack before he got to you, but either way. This was your father and his friends?
1:20:52🔗
Drew
How about mom's dad? Because something created dad's just awfulness, and your mom's ability to marry an awful guy like that.
1:21:01🔗
Caller
Oh, well, I was adopted later, when I was six. So then my dad died and they never saw him again. Well, duh. But then my biological mom, I don't see her anymore.
1:22:01🔗
Adam
All right. So there's a little neighbor in there, but that was later on in life. And then I had stepdad. Come on. No stepdad?
1:22:10🔗
Adam
Sorry, Kiki. Sorry. Anyway. All right. So you guys split that up. This is horrendous. And have you gotten some therapy, Kiki?
1:22:23🔗
Jason Winer
So is it any wonder that you're not interested in sex now? I mean, that's good.
1:22:27🔗
Adam
Or that you have no feeling, or that you're interested in sex, but for the wrong reasons?
1:22:31🔗
Drew
Well, this is what creates sexual compulsion, this kind of history. And one, aside from being compulsive about our sexuality, another common symptom of the people with this history is they feel really disconnected from their whole pelvic region, like there's something, just they can't get connected to it. Yeah, they had to. You had that, I know. You have to have a disconnection in order to manage these awful feelings associated with the experience.
1:22:54🔗
Adam
Since he's the guest, I'm gonna give him two bucks. Yeah, give him two bucks, sure. All right, listen, sweet pea. You've had horrible things done to you. I blame your dad. I'm glad he's dead. If his grave were somewhere between the studio and my car, I would dance a quick jig before I got into my car on top of your dad's grave. And I'm sorry for what's happened with you and your life. Now, here's your job. Please do not go on an emotional autopilot, hooked up with bad, abusive guys, pregnant, the whole nine yards.
1:23:40🔗
Adam
Well, get any kind of therapy you can get. If you're gonna have sex, what kind of protection are you using?
1:24:13🔗
Adam
Okay, just the reason I don't trust anyone you're attracted to, unless it's me. Are you attracted to me at all?
1:24:21🔗
Adam
Okay, well, I'm the only one who should date you. All right, but you're 14, so I'm going to give another 18 months. All right?
1:24:28🔗
Caller
So, like, what do I do? I keep, like, masturbating, and, like, it doesn't, like, please me at all.
1:24:33🔗
Adam
Listen, I don't know what you're going to do about that. Keep masturbating, stop having sex, break up with this guy. Kiki, get your grades up, don't get thrown out of school, don't get pregnant, just don't be a statistic, please?
1:24:57🔗
Adam
And by the way, you get raped by dad for a couple of years from 2 to 5. And it's never surprised that magically the neighbor gets you later on in life, magically the gang gets you magically, magically, magically, rape, rape, rape. I should write songs, shouldn't I?
1:25:15🔗
Adam
Musicals? Yeah. Oh, magically, magically, magically, magically rape and rape and rape. Magical, magical, magical, magical, rape and rape and rape with the gang.
1:25:29🔗
Adam
Yeah, I should write children's songs. I would like to work raping to just one children's song. Just if I could sneak it in, you know? Then the dragon raped the magic mushroom. Just see if you could slide it in.
1:25:50🔗
Adam
Then he paired the magic mushroom. All right, we're going to take ourselves a little break. I'm so glad her dad is dead.
1:25:58🔗
Drew
Is that good? Aren't you glad? We sort of escaped our outrage. We could focus on her and not be just furious.
1:26:05🔗
Adam
Right. For those of you who listen to the show, who think that's a bad way to be, you can go kill yourself. You really can. I mean, a guy rapes his daughter from two to five, lets his buddies in on it, and the fact that he's dead, sure, he could have got a little therapy, sure, something bad must have happened to him, sure, we're all God's creatures, but you know, the fact that he's dead, good. That's a good thing.
1:26:38🔗
Adam
That's right. Because listen to me, everybody, whenever you think about somebody that you have some compassion for, whether it's some murderer who's in prison or some father who raped his whatever, here's what you have to do, and here's the question you have to ask yourself. What would you want for him if it was your daughter? If it was you? If your daughter was the one whose house this guy broke into, raped and murdered. That's when you can make your decision over whether he should live or die or whatever, whatever justice is. Not when you're sitting up in your ivory tower. When it's happening, then you can make that decision. I know across the board those people wish this person was dead, and that's their prerogative. And I can't, I'm not going to try to change that feeling for them. That's the way I feel. I mean, how can you do that? You know what I mean? How can you protest some prison after, you know, in front of some prison that's going to execute some guy after the guy's killed nine, nine daughters and your daughter's off at college somewhere having it, doing a beer bong right now? Do you know what I'm saying? I mean, isn't that sort of the height of ego in a way?
1:27:44🔗
Drew
Hey, Thomas Jefferson felt that societies could not survive if they lose the ability to punish.
1:27:49🔗
Adam
That's right. I want to punish the innocent too. I say I don't stop with the guilty. I keep going. That's the difference. Everyone but me, Jason and maybe Drew will see how it goes. We'll be back.
1:28:04🔗
Adam
Well, it's worth hearing. Hey, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That is Dr. Drew. Forget about the phone number. We got enough of them calls. Jason Winer's our guest tonight. He's from The Blame Game, the MTV court show. It's a fun show. It's on 5.30 Monday through Friday, again on MTV, and also gonna be soon, soon seen coming up this week on Monday on the ABC Movie of the Week, King of the World. That is the Muhammad Ali story. Sorry.
1:29:02🔗
Jason Winer
And tonight, I'm on Loveline. Which is, like I was saying, it's just a huge deal for me. It's like, because I've been listening to this show forever, and I always said to myself, it's not Leno, it's not Letterman that you've made it when you're on. It's Loveline, and it's not even Loveline the TV show, because we did that a little while ago. It's this studio. But now, having arrived here. Now he's pissed. Yeah, now my illusions have been shattered. It's you guys stroll in here a minute before we do the show. I imagine a team of phone screeners. You know what I'm saying? The high tech, and it's not... A roomful. There's one person screening the calls. Adam's not wearing socks.
1:30:01🔗
Adam
Yeah, let's be fair. Come on, I'm going to get into trouble. Yeah, could there be any shoddier operation in this place?
1:30:11🔗
Adam
I know, the bloom is off the road for young Jason. But here's the deal, and this is why you kids got to stop screwing around with that internet. It's always a disappointment. Life is a disappointment. No matter what it is, it's always worse in person. Whenever you show up, it's a little bit disappointing. I mean, you know Drew, you know me, you know our voices. It's a little disappointment.
1:30:36🔗
Adam
I mean, it's a big disappointment. I'm sorry. I don't want to lessen your experience. It is a big disappointment. It's a disappointment for me when I show up. I listened to the show for many years before I hosted it, and frankly, I'm still disappointed in what goes on in here. I thought life would be much different. I thought I'd be driving down the freeway and people would be honking and waving at me.
1:30:57🔗
Yes.
1:31:01🔗
Caller
I got a little input on your all-fired-up TV show. It's on the USA Channel, Pacific Time, 10am, Monday through Friday, and it's always guaranteed to show at least the same episode twice in one week.
1:31:14🔗
Adam
The show ran, and I don't know enough about TV or syndication, but I thought you could not syndicate a show unless you did a hundred episodes. But maybe there's a new junior syndication or something now that when you've accumulated 15, 18, 20 episodes, you can just rerun those.
1:31:32🔗
Caller
Well, the USA Channel usually shows a lot of the shows that didn't make it on our regular network.
1:32:02🔗
Adam
I can't remember the script better than we do, but I'll tell you one thing. Drew's not a bad actor, is he?
1:32:28🔗
Adam
That's right. They would. I'm going to drive a golden follicle in the bridge of my nose in about a week. You want to be there for the ceremony, Scott? No. Okay. You guys have a good night. Thank you. Well, where's our damn checks? Shouldn't we be getting checks from that?
1:32:52🔗
Caller
First of all, I want to say I love the show. I listen to it every night because you make me laugh when you make fun of the callers so much.
1:33:17🔗
Caller
He got him back again. I want to know more information on this and how contagious it is.
1:33:31🔗
Jason Winer
Could you explain what this is? Because the image I have right now is so horrible that whatever-
1:33:46🔗
Drew
It's a viral illness. It's a sexually transmitted disease. Emily may have it and not know it. Maybe that's why he gets it back. They look like little zits except when you pick them, there's a little hard knot at the top that falls off and it heals real fast. They're not, it's not a big deal. It has no known consequences.
1:34:26🔗
Adam
On my back with my legs akimbo in front of a full length mirror, shining, bouncing the beam of a flashlight off of the mirror and into my rectum so I could see what I was doing.
1:34:43🔗
Adam
I know you talk a good ass pair story, but you can't compete with a carbuncle on the rectum. Thank you.
1:34:54🔗
Drew
Publicist was there, nice guy. Publicist was there, who brought him, was here the night I drained your hand.
1:35:12🔗
Adam
Yes. Have you been served with papers yet? Because my people are supposed to do that. I gotta get on there.
1:35:22🔗
Adam
Thank you. Okay, now hold on. Let me say something. Doctors do a lot of serious prodding, physical prodding and emotional. But doctors think it's okay for them to grab stuff on you that's very tender, that other people wouldn't dare touch or, you know, if they, you know, people hit me in the elbow, they go, oh, I'm sorry. Drew will grab my hand and start in with the thumb, push, you know, he starts kneading it.
1:36:08🔗
Jason Winer
Well, it would seem to me that a dead spot on your masturbation hand would be useful. You don't want to feel.
1:36:17🔗
Adam
Now, I just, here's how I do it. I don't have a large penis. I actually attach a small piece of Velcro to the end of my pinky. And then there's another piece that I've surgically glued on to the skin, on the shaft of my penis. And I just attach it and I go, dead. It's great. And I can do stuff with the rest of my hand.
1:36:36🔗
Adam
Dial, play the fiddle, whatever it takes. All right, where the hell are we here, Drew?
1:36:48🔗
Adam
Well, it's worth hearing. Hey, there we go. Mic's on. But it's not for long. All right, I want to thank Jason Winer for coming in. Real nice guy. And it's kind of like the Make-A-Wish Foundation. Except for the kid's pissed off. He's dying of cancer. He didn't get anything.
1:37:40🔗
Adam
All right, The Blame Game. Monday through Friday, 5.30, MTV. And of course, King of the World, the Muhammad Ali story coming up this Monday on ABC, 9 o'clock.