Episode 1000754886908

1:01 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised. Adam Carolla and Dr. Drew. Loveline, Coast to Coast.

1:12 Adam Hey, everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla. That's Dr. Drew coming to you from Minneapolis tonight.

1:20 Drew That's right.

1:20 Adam That's true, Drew?

1:21 Drew Yes, it is.

1:22 Voiceover Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Dr. Drew, Board Certified Physician, Addiction Medicine Specialist. We should have no troubles tonight. Occasionally, Drew and I are going to talk over each other because you don't realize it until somebody leaves the studio. But normally, Drew sits here and Drew has a lot of body language, like leaning back, drinking coffee, looking at his pager, wandering around, doing many various activities that aren't around the microphone.

1:50 Drew Hang on. I got to look at my pager.

1:52 Adam There you go. During the show. So I kind of know when to talk, which is all the time. And when he's not sitting there, I don't get to see him.

1:59 Drew Isn't some of that body language just sort of frustration, sitting back at you, waxing on, and just sort of relaxing, waiting for you to finish? Isn't that what it actually is?

2:08 Adam No. It's you looking at your pager, thinking about your wife, and basically him and Han, and not doing your job.

2:17 Drew Yeah. Okay.

2:18 Adam You realize I did some math the other day. I was working out, we get paid the same, which I find to be a bad thing.

2:23 Drew You're going to start figuring out how much we're paid per word now? No.

2:26 Adam I broke it down to syllable.

2:27 Yeah.

2:28 Adam And I did some math. And this is based on us being here the same amount of days, which is very generous, because as you know, I'm very dedicated to the audience, although I'll be gone most of next week.

2:38 Yes.

2:39 Adam I found out that I get a $1.27 a syllable, is basically what I'm paid.

2:46 Drew And you need to work on economy of language.

2:49 Adam Right. You're paid $842.23 a syllable.

2:53 Drew See how much more meaningful my words are?

2:55 Adam Yeah. How much more worthwhile? I stayed up last night going through tapes, breaking down syllables. I had an abacus up my ass. It was huge. $843.23 or something like that is what. I don't have the exact figures here, but that's what you get a syllable. I'm now down to $0.90 a syllable.

3:12 Drew Good times.

3:13 Adam All right. How was the airport and everything today?

3:16 Drew Easy. Really easy.

3:18 Adam It was easy.

3:21 Drew Take off a half hour instead of adding an hour to your planning. You know what I'm saying?

3:25 Adam Are you asking me?

3:27 Drew No.

3:28 Adam Because I'm leaving tomorrow morning to meet Drew in Ohio State, and I'm getting picked up at 6 AM to make an eight o'clock flight.

3:40 Drew The main thing is going to be traffic through downtown and all that. That's your main problem.

3:43 Adam Really? Okay. I'm going to have to have a little conversation with somebody I told to speak to you about exactly what it was like. Oh, boy. He did. He did. He did, and he added time on, and you're saying deduct time.

3:57 Drew I told him to expect you to make the guy wait outside at the bottom of your palatial mansion for 45 minutes.

4:03 Adam Factor that in, Mr. $843.23 a syllable. So you went through LAX today, and what was the height and security? I'm doing it tomorrow, and I'm interested, but I also figure people who are listening are interested in that.

4:17 Drew Here's what it is. There's LAPD parked on the streets, and if you're not in a license vehicle, they turn you back.

4:25 Adam What does that mean, a license vehicle?

4:26 Drew Like a bus or a taxi or a limousine, something like that. The traffic in the usual circle, where it's usually awful, is wide open. You have to get a boarding pass at the ticket counter. You can't go directly to the gate anymore. They won't let you through security until you've checked in at the ticket counter. That was much lighter than usual.

4:48 Adam Give me a percentage wise.

4:50 Drew 50 percent.

4:51 Adam Half the people that are normally at LAS.

4:54 Drew Yeah, in my humble estimation. I was at Northwest and I wasn't at the usual, Northwest, right, not the usual.

5:00 Oh, boy.

5:03 Drew I'm just answering questions.

5:04 Adam Shut up Anderson, please. I think people are yelling at him to shut up. He pushed a button. What I'm saying is, is I think I'm interested in what the procedure is.

5:14 Drew All right, and so there's one extra step. Before you get to security, a guy wants to see your boarding pass. Then you go to security. It's the same fast food workers there doing their thing. Right. They have a heightened thing they go through where they put everything in the conveyor belt and they look at it very carefully. But there's no one in line at security, so it takes a lot less time than normal.

5:34 Adam Right.

5:35 Drew And you go to your gate.

5:36 Adam All right, so overall, if you're being driven by a town car limousine or something and you can drive right in, you're probably going to get through there faster.

5:46 Drew Yes, you're shaving time.

5:47 Adam All right, thank you. Drew, do you got the calls in front of you?

5:51 Drew I do.

5:51 Adam Well, what's the weather like in Minneapolis?

5:53 Drew About 60 degrees. We just have 55 degrees and rainy as hell.

5:57 Adam Fantabulous.

5:57 Drew Yeah, prepare for that.

5:58 Adam Okay. You want to pick the calls? Yeah, maybe the lightning round.

6:02 Drew Yeah, this is Nick. Uh-huh.

6:04 Adam Nick, you're 14.

6:06 Caller Nick?

6:08 Adam Boy, Drew, you're really on camera.

6:10 Drew Good times.

6:10 Adam Yeah, good times. All right, you want to pick another?

6:13 Caller Yeah.

6:15 Drew Rodney? I wait that one at home.

6:16 Adam Wait, I may hit that. Rodney, go ahead.

6:18 Caller Yes, sir.

6:19 Adam 45, what's up?

6:21 Caller Is this Dr. Drew?

6:22 Adam Yeah, that is.

6:23 Caller OK, now I've got a question I've been worried about or wondering. It is kind of giving me a little steam.

6:31 Drew A little steam?

6:32 Caller Well, or something.

6:33 Drew A little steam.

6:34 Caller Huh?

6:34 Drew No, go ahead.

6:35 Caller OK. I've been well and out and, you know, stick straight up and I was in the penitentiary for 14 months. What for? Straight. First, aggravated assault and residential burglary, which I don't steal and I don't, you know.

6:54 Drew Whatever you did, Rodney, thank you for being honest. I don't think we've ever had that question answered. Listen, Adam, have we ever had someone actually come forward and tell us precisely what they were in jail for?

7:04 Caller Well, I just told you.

7:05 Adam No, I know. You're the first. It's usually parole violation. Yeah.

7:09 Caller Well, that's what put me in there for the 14 months. Right. It was for alcohol and public intoxication in a dry county in Arkansas, Boonville, Arkansas.

7:18 Adam Who did you assault?

7:22 Caller Okay. Now, this is not going on radio or, you know, it needs to be worded better. But I was having DTs. See, I'm an alcoholic. Right.

7:34 Drew Right.

7:36 Caller And I was kind of hadn't slept for three days and hadn't had any alcohol or food. And I was hallucinating. I don't know. If you're a doctor, you should know that doesn't happen.

7:45 Drew Well, I know. Yes, yes, right.

7:46 Caller And I really believe there was people after me.

7:49 Drew Right.

7:50 Caller And I was running and I was knocking on doors and I say, you got a gun? There's people after me.

7:55 Drew Thinking about DTs, they have about a 60% fatality rates. You're actually very fortunate to have lived through that.

8:01 Adam We're not, but Rodney is.

8:04 Drew It actually doesn't sound like you have DTs yet. It's something called alcohol hallucinosis, which is this, you see bugs, you see small animals, you start getting paranoid.

8:11 Caller Or you think somebody's after you. Yeah. I could walk down to the road. If you got the time, I could explain the whole thing to you.

8:20 Drew No, it's okay, Rodney. What's your question?

8:21 Caller My whole problem is, I got put back into the penitentiary for something where I went out and knocked on one lady's door and said, please, lady, let me in. They're after me.

8:33 Drew Yeah.

8:33 Caller And she opened the door and looked kind of wild and crazy. And I was scared, so I went in. And I said, come on in here. You know, they're going to come around here. You know what I mean?

8:45 Drew Yeah, but let's get to your question. What's your question, Rodney? What's the question?

8:48 Adam I always love those assault stories where you hear the version of it, like you hear Don King's version of killing a man with the heel of his boot on the curb, you know. And it's like, I feared for my life, you know, Don King's 270 pounds, this guy's like a jockey, like 5'1, 105, you know, and he threatened and you beat him multiple times about the head with a Super Bowl ring.

9:11 Caller I never hurt nobody.

9:12 Adam Well, okay, whatever you did, you didn't just go in and call the cops. You must have done something to her.

9:16 Caller No, I walked in her door and locked it and said, come on in. And then the law come and got me out. And they said criminal trespassing, aggravated assault, and criminal trespassing.

9:26 Adam Right.

9:26 Caller And I did not steal nothing. I didn't hit nobody. But that's beside the point.

9:31 Adam I see. Okay.

9:32 Drew But the woman's still in therapy in a psychiatric hospital. Go ahead, Rodney, what's the question?

9:37 Caller Okay. When I went in, you know, my, I hate, just, you know, my penis was like, was staying up.

9:48 Adam Right.

9:49 Drew Stand up.

9:50 Caller Right. Okay. When I come out, it's pointing down.

9:54 Adam Good. That, that's good. That's what I want out of the correctional facilities.

9:58 Caller Yeah, right. It's a very short one. You know what I mean?

10:00 Adam Very symbolic. No, it's not short.

10:01 Caller But I feel self-conscious of it cause it's don't feel like mine.

10:05 Adam Are you walking on your hands?

10:08 Caller No.

10:08 Drew No, that's what makes it go back up.

10:10 Adam I see. All right. So you're-

10:12 Caller I'm wondering about Peyronie's disease. Have you ever heard of that?

10:16 Drew Peyronie's. Right.

10:16 Adam It's when a fish eats your penis.

10:18 Caller No, no.

10:20 Drew Peyronie's. Peyronie's disease. Hey, Rodney.

10:23 Caller It's scar tissue or something.

10:25 Drew Hey, Rodney, did they put a catheter in you when you were sick with the DTs?

10:28 Caller No, they've never done nothing. They've never served nothing up my rectal. Okay.

10:33 Drew Yeah. Why would you have such a sad penis now?

10:36 Caller Huh?

10:37 Adam Even with an erection-

10:38 Caller I'm 45.

10:39 Adam Right. With an erection, it points down, right?

10:42 Caller Well, I mean, it's not the same one.

10:44 Adam Okay. It's a new erection. I see.

10:47 Drew Try, Rodney, try some vitamin E. Try 800 units of vitamin E every day.

10:52 Caller For you, it will.

10:53 Drew If it's not going to work, it's going to be time for a surgical correction.

10:56 Caller I think there's something drawing it. What about the, what's called the-

11:01 Caller Right.

11:01 Adam It's called gravity.

11:02 Caller No, the other-

11:04 Drew Peronies. It might be a Peronies.

11:06 Caller No.

11:07 Caller All right. Hold on.

11:08 Caller Hey, Rodney.

11:09 Caller I've been trying to call you for a while.

11:11 Adam Rodney, are you still drinking?

11:13 Caller Yes, I am.

11:14 Caller Of course.

11:15 Caller I'll continue till I stop, but-

11:16 Adam Don't you think you're going to get into trouble again?

11:19 Caller No.

11:20 Caller Okay.

11:21 Adam You have any kids?

11:23 Caller Yeah. I'm in Georgia from Arkansas, and I've got a motorcycle in Arkansas, and I've got my three kids and my three grandkids and my eight-year-old lady.

11:33 Adam Three kids.

11:34 Caller Boy. How are they now?

11:35 Drew And three grandkids at 45.

11:37 Adam How are they doing?

11:38 Caller They're doing fine. They love me. They come up-

11:41 Adam Sure, right.

11:42 Caller I like the way you just described.

11:43 Adam Grandpa, get some beer. Sure.

11:44 Caller See, I didn't see them for ten years.

11:47 Adam All right. Hold on, Drew, does your goddamn page have to go off into the microphone every night? I never noticed how annoying that was.

11:56 Caller Yeah.

11:57 Caller A lot of times I can't think real quick to say what I want to say.

12:01 Caller Right.

12:01 Adam Okay, stop. You got to stop drinking.

12:03 Caller That's what I wanted to say then.

12:04 Drew Adam, he said he'd stop when he drank till he stopped. That's what he said.

12:07 Adam All right, Drew, would you put him on hold for Christ's sake?

12:12 Drew You do that at your end.

12:13 Adam I'm trying. It's not doing anything.

12:15 Drew Then hit his button one more time and then put it on hold.

12:18 Adam And who said it's my job?

12:19 Caller Yeah.

12:20 Drew There you go. You had him. There you go.

12:24 Adam Oh, Drew, with that pager. Drew, really, did you hold the pager up to the microphone? Is that what you do? You actually do that?

12:32 Caller All right.

12:33 Adam You don't have that thing? It doesn't vibrate?

12:35 Drew It doesn't have that setting, this one.

12:37 Caller Really?

12:38 Caller No.

12:38 Drew Well, at least not that I figured out. Not that I figured out. It doesn't have it.

12:41 Caller They got it.

12:42 Drew It's an e-mail pager.

12:43 Adam All right, Drew, put it somewhere else. It goes off every night. Just yell at the person who does it. Don't they know you got a gig? All right. All right, Drew. Brooke?

12:54 Hey, guys.

12:54 Adam Hey, you're 15. What's up?

12:56 Caller Nothing. I love you guys. Love the show. I listen to it every night.

12:59 Adam Thank God that Ronnie has three kids and three grandkids.

13:02 Caller You have grandkids at 45.

13:04 Adam Listen, listen. You know, we make fun of the ethnicities on this show and maybe in Southern California.

13:11 Drew You do.

13:11 Adam I do. And Drew does in his heart and soul. But we forget all the white trash it covers this country, like a really bad tablecloth.

13:20 Drew Oh, Adam, I got this thing to vibrate.

13:22 Adam Oh, good times. Good times.

13:24 Caller Keep it in your pocket.

13:26 Adam What's up there, Brooke? 15.

13:29 Caller Right. All right, here's a deal. I've had some major family problems since I was pretty young. I mean, it was nothing like abuse or anything like that. But it was just like, you know, my family's been depressed and, you know, everybody's been sick. I mean, since, I mean, I've been drinking since I was 12. I've been smoking since I was 13. I've been able to drive a car since I was 12 because my parents can get blackouts. And so-

13:53 Drew You are not an alcoholic, though.

13:54 Caller No, no, I just, I'm saying I-

13:56 Drew Adam, Adam, you see that?

13:58 Adam She's not an alcoholic.

13:59 Drew She is not an alcoholic. I just, she doesn't give me the feeling. She doesn't get the gene.

14:04 Adam All right.

14:04 Drew Go ahead.

14:05 Caller Right. And it's just, you know, I've been trying to drive a car because my parents black out. It's just a complicated situation with that.

14:12 Drew Your parents are alcoholics, though.

14:14 Caller No, they're not.

14:15 Drew Why do they black out?

14:16 Caller No, you know, it's basically my mom, but my dad travels all the time. My mom's sick all the time. My brother's sick all the time. They both have, you know, diseases and problems like that. You know, I don't want to go into detail. It'll take too long. But basically, my mom has blackout sometimes due to the diseases and problems she's had. And with my dad out of town all the time for his job, I've been trained to drive a car, basically.

14:40 Wow. Okay.

14:41 Caller So I've been driving since I was 12.

14:43 Okay.

14:44 Caller I talked to my dad the other day because, you know, everything has just gotten worse. And I was like, you know, you know, I felt so depressed lately, kind of like, you know, I don't know if it's a panic attack, but I'll get so short of breath and so kind of like jumpy and freaking out.

15:01 Drew That's a panic attack. Did the sort of world situation contribute to your panic? The World Trade Center stuff? You're not affected by that?

15:09 Caller No. It's just like, I don't know if it's a panic attack, but I can't breathe and I can't breathe.

15:13 Drew It is. It is. It is. And here's, here's, yeah. And basically, what's happening here is you've become the parent at a time in your life when you need emotional nourishment, nourishment and support in order for you to develop your own internal competencies, your own sense of yourself. You're not getting that. There's really nothing there for you to manage your feelings, and all your body has in response to those kinds of overwhelming kinds of feeling like depression is anxiety. You see?

15:39 Adam Yeah, I see.

15:40 Drew I put her on hold. She wants to ask if there are medications she can take, and there are.

15:44 Adam All right, tell her.

15:45 Drew All right, for panic, Paxil is good. You need to see someone who knows how to treat depression, because it sounds like you're primarily having depression, and it may be more about just treating the depression, not so much the panic attacks.

15:54 Adam And that's a 15-year-old girl who sounds like a 35-year-old Vietnam nurse.

15:58 Drew Yeah, wasn't that true?

16:00 Adam She absolutely did, and I don't mean old like, oh, she's been chain smoking her whole life, and her voice is raspy.

16:05 Drew Like through it.

16:06 Adam That did not sound like a 15-year-old human being. That was a human being who was taking care of their parents and driving mom who had blackouts or who passed out since the age of 12.

16:17 Drew Yep.

16:19 Adam Okay, what's up there, Drew?

16:20 Caller Meg?

16:21 Yes.

16:21 Adam 25, what's up?

16:23 Hi.

16:24 Drew Hey.

16:25 I just had a question. I can't seem to get into a relationship and I don't know why.

16:33 Adam Oh, okay. Well, we know. We've been talking about this for a while.

16:38 Drew About Meg, yeah, specifically. Oh, yeah.

16:40 Adam Yeah, Meg. I figured you would have called sooner than this.

16:45 Okay.

16:46 Drew Meg, what happens? What's mad with your relationships?

16:48 It's not even that. It's not that I've never been in one in the past. I've been in many relationships. It just seems over the past couple of years, it's gotten more difficult for some reason.

16:57 Drew You're fat.

16:58 Adam Oh, Drew, please. It may be true, but-

17:01 Drew More difficult to find a relationship or more difficult to find a decent relationship?

17:04 A decent relationship, more. People say I'm too picky, but I really don't think so.

17:10 Adam By the way, that should not be taken as a compliment at all. Let me translate, you're being too picky, which is, listen, you steaming pile of ass. Look at you. When's the last time you took a look in a mirror? Now, let's go. What do you want, Prince Charming?

17:26 No, I'm not even necessarily looking for somebody who's perfect. I'm just looking for someone who's like respectable.

17:32 Drew What has happened in your previous, yeah, Meg, what has happened in your previous relationships?

17:36 My previous relationships have been okay. Like up until I was 19, I came into recovery when I was 19. Up until then, I was in just, you know, random relationships, no big deal, just pretty much teenage relationships, no big deal. And then over the past couple years, I've had two serious relationships, but they weren't, they didn't have staying power. You know what I mean? The guys were just irresponsible and immature and completely lame.

18:03 Adam Well, listen, here's the question that all females should ask themselves, especially in youngish females, you're 25 years old. What about the guys that you're attracted to? I mean, you get this string of guys that are not abusive or anything, but not maybe good relationship material. I'll bet there's a lot of guys out there who are good relationship material that you're not attracted to, and what about being attracted to those guys?

18:29 Caller It's not even that. It's less of a physical thing. It's not even...

18:32 Adam No, no, no, no, no. I know.

18:33 Drew I said it...

18:35 Adam I didn't say anything about physical. I said attract...

18:37 Caller Well, that's what most people imply when they talk about that kind of thing.

18:40 Drew No, no, no, no, no, no.

18:40 Adam Well, most people may do that, but why don't you listen to me? I said, why aren't you attracted to the guys who would be better guys? I didn't say what they look like. I don't mean attractive. I mean, why don't you gravitate toward those guys?

18:54 Caller When I develop, I start to get to know these guys is that they turn into friends.

19:00 Drew Oh, this is interesting. No, no, no. What Adam is getting at is, are you a trauma survivor?

19:05 Caller No.

19:06 Adam What?

19:07 Drew No?

19:07 Adam No. You work.

19:09 Drew Why would she sabotage relationships? Why would she attract guys that were not such great guys?

19:14 Adam I'm saying that women, younger women, and I would say younger, and Drew, you stop me if I'm wrong, and tell me what you think the number is, but women under the age of about 27, 28, like guys that run with a slightly faster crowd. I'm not talking about biker troublemakers. I'm not talking about dating Tommy Lee or Billy Idol. I'm talking about guys that aren't ready to settle down.

19:38 Drew The alpha male types.

19:39 Adam Guys that have a little faster paced life, and there's plenty of schmo guys who would like to be in a long term stable relationship who are 24, 25 years old. But women sometimes at 23, 24, 25, and certainly at 18 or 19, aren't ready for that guy.

19:56 Drew That's right.

19:57 Adam And Meg here is 25. She's been through some recovery, and she's getting the point where she's saying, I'm ready for that guy, or I'm becoming ready for that guy.

20:05 Drew It may be happening to you, Meg, at 25 as opposed to 21 or 22, because you spent those years using, and you really needed to develop from when you got sober until now, and now you're ready for the more substantial relationship, and it takes some work to go out and find that person, and you will.

20:19 Adam Right. If you're better, right?

20:23 Drew She is, she's better.

20:24 Adam All right.

20:24 Drew Yeah, if you're well.

20:26 Adam And Drew, what is that voice, too, of the 25-year-old chick who's recovered? Do you know that voice?

20:32 Drew Yeah, I heard it in her immediately.

20:34 Adam Yeah, it's like a little salty. Yeah, it's a little, it's, it's what we're.

20:40 Drew It's cigarettes.

20:41 Adam It's cigarettes, it's a lot of coffee, it's a lot of late nights, and it's a lot of talking.

20:49 Drew Yeah.

20:49 Adam It's a lot of rationalizing, but there's something that's a little, it's a, there's a little edge to it, which is don't F with me. I've seen worse than you, and I've kicked their ass, and you want some, bring it on. There's, it's not necessarily aggressive, it's just I've seen it all, and you ain't gonna pull, there's nothing, nothing new you can show me.

21:10 Drew It's a little sort of hypervigilant, you know? It's just sort of guarded and like ready for action.

21:15 Adam Yeah, I don't even know, it's just a tonal thing, it's weird. We talked to somebody who was 15 a few minutes ago, who was a very old sounding 15 year old, but didn't have any of the qualities that Meg has.

21:26 Drew None.

21:27 Adam Then there's that recovering female voice of Meg's, which is just, it's like somebody put a voice box into all recovering female women and they sound exactly the same.

21:40 Drew Like Meg.

21:40 Adam Like Meg, yeah. She's the voice of all recovering women over 25. Alright Drew, should we take a break?

21:47 Drew Please.

21:47 Adam Okay, Drew's over there in Minneapolis, it's raining, yes?

21:51 Drew Yes, and Adam, I want you to speak to Peter as soon as you get off the air.

21:55 Adam Yes, I shall.

21:56 Drew And you'll know why.

21:57 Adam I shall give a real talking to to young Peter, and we'll be back with more of your calls and questions after this.

22:07 Caller Um, back in a minute.

22:33 Adam Hey, everybody, it's the Loveline. I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew. Dr. Drew is in Minneapolis this evening, where it's actually raining, and I hope it's raining when I get there tomorrow.

22:44 Drew You will love this weather.

22:45 Adam It's cold.

22:46 Drew It's weather.

22:47 Adam That's what I'm needing. That's what I'm wanting. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. No guest. Drew?

22:56 Drew Yeah.

22:57 Adam You ready to rock?

22:58 Drew Britney's up.

22:59 Adam Britney, you're 19. What's going on?

23:00 Caller Hey, my cousin is 19 years old, and he moved to Arizona about a month ago, and he called my mom this morning, saying that he went to bed with a bump on his cheek, and he was feeling sick to his stomach, and then he woke up this morning and he felt fine, but his face was swollen and he had a black eye. My mom told him to go to the emergency room, and he's like, why don't you go to work?

23:19 Drew No, he should have got to the emergency room immediately. Yeah, I know.

23:21 Caller Well, here's the thing. That was this afternoon around two or so, and then around 7.30, his roommate called and was like, yeah, I had to take your cousin to the emergency room because he was delirious and sick and blah, blah, blah. And it was a really brief conversation, and we haven't heard it ever since.

23:36 Drew Oh my god.

23:37 Caller So I'm wondering if you have any idea what condition he might be in, or if that sounds like a spider bite or what?

23:41 Drew Well, it sounds like basically something called cellulitis, which is infection gets into the soft tissue. And the problem is it gets in the orbit around the eye and can track into the central nervous system really easily. It can be a very, very serious infection.

23:53 Caller Can it be fatal?

23:55 Drew It can be. I mean, these days, those kinds of things are pretty controllable. But, boy, he really waited way too long.

24:03 Caller Yeah.

24:03 Drew Way too long. Hopefully, he'll be okay. Hopefully, he won't get a meningitis or anything like that from it.

24:07 Adam Oh, how do you get this, Drew?

24:09 Drew I don't know. I worry very, I don't want to freak Brittany out anymore, but on very occasion, there could be tumors behind the eye and things that can present like this too. But that's usually in young kids. And mostly, this is just like a zit, a zit that goes bad. And the infection gets going in the soft tissue. And it literally is the flesh-eating bacteria that they have, it gets, it gets, well, it's not.

24:28 Adam Don't worry, let me tell you, it breaks my heart to see a zit go bad. They drop out of school, they start running with the wrong crowd.

24:36 Drew Yeah, it is, it's a sad state. But that idea is the bacteria gets into the soft tissue and starts spreading. And again, because of the proximity with the central nervous system, it's a big deal when it's in the head.

24:48 Caller Would that lead to like cold sweats and climiness?

24:50 Drew It's absolutely, absolutely. It's just a bad, bad infection. Probably staph, something like that.

24:55 Adam It's funny that Brittany brought up a spider bite because right before we went on the air, I was, I mean, just now coming back from the commercial break, I wanted to tell a story about a bug being in my room and I was almost late because of it. But I thought, I'll forget. I have these weird bugs that live on where my house is. I've never seen around my house, anywhere but on my property basically and in all the millions of houses I've lived in, in around where my house is now. I've never seen this bug before. It's a crazy looking centipede bug that has a million legs and runs a thousand miles an hour and is big.

25:34 Drew Silverfish.

25:36 Adam Drew.

25:36 Drew Like that?

25:37 Adam Drew.

25:37 Drew You've never seen it before.

25:38 Adam You think I've seen a silverfish before?

25:40 Drew I would think so, living in North Hollywood and all.

25:42 Adam Yes.

25:43 Drew In fact, you've made a bed of them one time.

25:45 Adam I said it was big and looked like it was big. I'm talking about two and a half inches long and black and really crazy legs. Drew, I'm not exaggerating. I've seen them three inches long, but they average about two and a half, and they run a thousand miles an hour. I don't think they're dangerous, but they're the creepiest looking creatures you've ever seen in your life and no one has ever seen one. I actually captured one and tried to show it to an exterminator. He didn't know what the hell it was. Wow. He told me to move. He started chanting and praying and then he slid out the front door and the door closed by itself and he told me to move. But anyway, I see these things around all the time. I went up, I hopped out of the shower tonight. I was running late. I went up to my room. I turned the light on and there it was right in the middle of the wall. And I was just staring at it. And it was a scene out of like Good, the Bad and the Ugly where it was close up on my eyes, close up on the bug's eyes. And it was sitting right in the middle of the room. And I was just staring at it. And I didn't want to smash it. I mean, you smash one of these things. It's like, it's really, it's like having a buffalo carcass in your room. I mean, it'd take days to clean it out of there.

26:51 Drew It's like a potato bug.

26:52 Adam I'd have to repaint. I really would. So I said, I needed a glass to put over the thing. And then I would slide an envelope underneath it. And then I would-

27:01 Drew But you couldn't break the eye contact though.

27:03 Caller Exactly.

27:04 Adam So I'm standing and I'm staring at this thing. And it's right in the middle of my white wall in the middle of my bedroom. And I'm looking around the room and there's nothing. The only thing there is is like an empty, you know, Avion bottle, but it's not going to fit into the mouth of that thing. It's got a little opening. And I'm looking and there's nothing. So I'm staring at the thing and I'm staring at the thing. And I run across the hole into the other room. And I'm looking for something, an ashtray, something clear, something I can trap it. Nothing. I run back. It's still there. But I'm saying to myself, the second I run downstairs and go to the kitchen, I know when I come back up, it's going to be gone. And I actually step out of the room a couple of times and step back just to try to catch it and its movement. But it's not budget. It's sitting right there in the middle of this big wall. Mind you, it is without exaggeration, exaggeration is 932 now. I'm staring at the clock. I'm still wearing a towel. I just stepped out. I mean, I'm going to be late if I'm not in my car in the next minute and a half. I run downstairs. I run back upstairs. Where's that goddamn bug when I come into the room? GIO Under the bed. Nowhere. Not where it was. And I'm thinking, I'm totally freaking because I'm like, there's no... I'm late for work now, but I got to find this bug because I can't... There's no way I'm going to work and I'm going to come home and go to bed tonight. It's in there. It's in the room. It's under the covers. It's somewhere. It's breeding. It's planning. You know, it's hatching a plan. I know it. So now I got the flashlight. I'm like, I'm on my knees. I got to find this bug, except for I have about 40 seconds to find it because I'm already late. And Drew's not going to be in the studio tonight. I got a car picking me up at 530 tomorrow morning. I find the bug and I throw a wine glass over and I run out of the house.

28:47 Drew And it's sitting there with a wine glass on it.

28:49 Adam There it sits in my closet. Yes. And let me explain what's going to happen. I'm going to take a sleeping pill downstairs tonight. I'm going to stumble up about 145. And before I kick the light on, I'm going to knock over the glass. 486 stitches my right foot. I'll be eaten by this bug tonight in my sleep. All right. Where are we? You got a call lined up there, Drew?

29:10 Drew I do indeed.

29:13 Carrie.

29:14 Adam Carrie, you're 19. What's up?

29:15 Caller Hi there. I'm just calling in concerns to parents of abuse and how to break them because I've had a really, really bad habit in time with even just this young of picking just the worst of worst losers.

29:28 Drew Abusive losers?

29:29 Caller Abusive losers. So I don't even get anything out of it and I get beat up for it too.

29:33 Drew Oh, you actually get physically abused?

29:35 Caller Well, sometimes, but the worst so far has been emotionally. I mean, I've, it's just, I can give you horror stories that have made my friends cry.

29:46 Drew Do you read books? Do you try to educate yourself about this kind of problem?

29:49 Caller Yes, but it's just the type of men I'm attracted to.

29:52 Drew Like women, does it like women who love too much or men who hate women, women who love them?

29:56 Caller Yeah.

29:56 Drew Those sorts of books, yeah. But if you read those books, I'm asking you, Carrie, do you read about your condition?

30:02 Adam I didn't know you were asking, jackass.

30:04 Drew I said, do you read about this stuff?

30:06 Adam You were giving like examples, that didn't sound like you were asking.

30:08 Drew Well, she said, I read these books, I read these, you've got to educate yourself about what you're dealing with here. And then if you want to get better, you need to get treatment.

30:17 Caller Yes, sir.

30:18 Adam Who beat on you?

30:20 Caller Pardon me?

30:20 Adam Who beat on you? Your dad?

30:22 Caller My first boyfriend.

30:24 Drew No, no, no, before that.

30:26 Caller Well, just recently, I've just had my father never, ever touched me. My parents have never touched me. They've been very loving people.

30:33 Drew No. You've never had any disorder?

30:36 Caller No.

30:37 Adam Somebody screwed you up.

30:39 Caller Not that I know of. It's just, I think I'm just weird like that.

30:42 Drew Well, you know, Adam, it does happen where people get it, women get in these cycles of abuse, these sort of victim, victim roles they can't get out of. And it doesn't always start with victimization in childhood, though certainly, as you well know, the vast majority of the time it does. But they can certainly get into that.

30:56 Adam Oh, yeah, yeah, you know, I mean, we play the odds on this show, and we always seem to be right, but, you know, it's 95% of the time, and you may be the 5% who just gets, finds abusive guys.

31:07 Caller Yeah, well, I also wanted to comment that I'm in a relationship right now, and this guy is just outstanding. I'm so scared that he's going to be another one, and I'm constantly just looking for excuses to run already.

31:19 Drew Well, that almost, by virtue of how you're behaving, suggest that he is not an abuser.

31:24 Adam Yes, if you're looking for excuses to get out, he's a guy you need to stay in with.

31:29 Caller Yeah, I mean, he's amazing. He's working on his masters right now. This man is just so...

31:33 Drew Well, maybe this is it. Maybe this is going to break the cycle for you, if you've picked a good guy.

31:37 Caller I'm just so scared. Is there anything I need to watch for, even if he admitted it?

31:41 Adam Well, wait a minute. Hold on. Carrie, you're a human being, right?

31:44 Caller Yeah.

31:44 Adam You're in a relationship with another human being? It's not like you have to set up a transit and see if the building shifts or not, whether to evacuate. You're a human being. He's a human being. You're in a relationship with him. You don't know whether he's going to start being abusive. You don't feel like you know him.

32:06 Caller I know him, but I'm just so scared of past offense.

32:09 Adam I know. There's idiots out there, but you love this guy. You trust this guy. He's a good guy. He's working on his masters.

32:17 Drew But the others have been surprising too.

32:18 Adam She thought they were good guys and all of a sudden, I know, but I'm saying, don't go through life looking for clues. You know, start feeling.

32:28 Caller Blatant warning signs I should watch out for.

32:30 Adam Well, he goes upside your head with like a shoe.

32:34 Drew Does he have trouble containing anger? Is he aggressive?

32:38 Caller No, I mean, he's actually studying abnormal psychology. That's his major.

32:42 Drew Strike one.

32:43 Adam That's the one to look for. I was going to say, run. Are you in the house now? He's upstairs. Get out.

32:49 Caller No.

32:50 Adam All right. Listen, Carrie, Carrie, Carrie, listen, how did you get so well? How did you become such a mess with two loving parents who never raised a hand to you?

32:59 Drew Were you adopted?

33:00 Caller No, I'm a military child and I've moved every two to three years. So I'm picking up my kids.

33:05 Drew That does affect kids. It really does.

33:07 Adam Yeah. Read those books. Get a little therapy. And here's the thing, everybody. I know it because I've been there myself. Don't go through life in that posture of waiting for people to do things to you. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, right. If you, and I don't mean be aggressive and put on that BS bravado facade where you're gonna screw anybody who gets near you. I just mean, don't walk through waiting for people to drop bombs on you. Waiting for dams to break, waiting for the other foot to drop. It's a sad way to go through life. You're 19, I'm sure you're attractive, you have things to offer, you're a good person. You can figure these things out, you have a mind that functions. And don't just sit around waiting for somebody to abuse you. It's not a good way to go through life.

34:00 Drew Yeah, I mean, if there's reciprocity, if he has respect for you, if there are good boundaries, if he has no previous history, if he's not using substances, if your family system is intact, if there's no aggression in the family, that's a good sign. And then you wanting to sabotage or run from the relationship is also a sign that he's probably a good guy.

34:16 Adam All right. What percentage of our listening audience knows what reciprocity means, Drew?

34:21 Drew Zero.

34:22 Adam Thank you. All right, let's talk to Sandra. She's 27. Sandra?

34:26 Sandra.

34:27 Caller Hi. Are you there?

34:31 Adam Yeah.

34:33 I have a very close friend that I've learned to love. We're very honest with each other. But I have a habit of falling in love with gay men, and I've been really attracted for him lately. And I don't know if I should tell him. I mean, I know nothing about him.

34:52 Drew Is he gay?

34:53 Yes. Yes, he's gay.

34:56 Drew Well, why not tell him? Nothing's going to happen either way.

34:58 Caller I know, but I'm afraid that I'm going to lose him.

35:00 I'm afraid that he's going to get all funny and weird with me, and he's just going to turn tail and run. But on the other hand, we're so close, we're so honest with each other that I feel like I'm lying to him. I feel like I'm not being the type of friend that I should be.

35:15 Drew Adam, correct me if I'm wrong. The turn tail run thing is something that a straight guy does. If he's afraid, he's going to get the full court press. You know what I mean? The gay guy knows that it's not going to work.

35:25 Caller Let me tell you about the gay guy.

35:26 Adam He'll turn tail, but he won't run. That's part of being gay, is turning that tail. You know what I'm saying, Drew?

35:32 Caller Yeah. He turned the tail?

35:34 Yeah. What if he gets awkward with me? What if I don't want to lose him and I don't want him to feel like he has to hide anything from me?

35:46 Drew Didn't I just finish saying that that's not likely to happen?

35:48 Adam How old is this guy?

35:49 25.

35:50 Adam Hold on a second. I got to yell at Pete. Pete, stop picking the nuts out of the goddamn mixed nut can. He's driving me nuts, Drew, over here. He's picking nuts. I'm looking at him through the glass. He's picking out all my good nuts. He's got all the cashews and all the almonds he's going for. Put the goddamn can down.

36:07 Drew Hey, I got to eat from that can next week.

36:08 Adam Stop it.

36:09 Drew I know you want these nuts.

36:11 Adam There's nothing worse than watching a guy pick out all your good nuts from your mixed nut can in there. Put that can down. I can't work watching him do that. It's a form of segregation. It's the only kind of segregation I don't agree with is picking out the good nuts. Sandra? Sandra?

36:26 Caller He's only taking the almonds.

36:27 Adam Okay. He's only taking the almonds? I love those almonds.

36:30 Drew My favorite.

36:31 Adam Yeah. Here's what you get. You know what you get at the end of that can? You get no almonds and every other nut has been through Pete's greasy paws. Get used to it.

36:42 Caller You know what? I know all the Freudian implications.

36:44 Adam Oh yeah.

36:44 Caller Falling in love with gay men.

36:47 Drew Sandra, hey, listen, just stay focused on reality, okay? You keep trying to connect with impossible love objects. That's it. If you want to change that, change it. If you don't, fine. He is not likely to turn tail and run. He's not likely to get awkward because there's no possibility of a relationship. That's a further distortion on your part. He'll be amused that you feel that way about him. Your relationship is not going to be changed.

37:14 Adam Maybe flattered. How old is he?

37:16 Drew He's 25.

37:17 Adam Did he take good care of his skin?

37:19 Drew Yes. She said he's gay.

37:21 Adam I know. Of course. Gay men glow. They're like 100 watt light bulbs. They glow. They glisten. They wink at you. I don't mean their eyes. Their cheeks wink. I mean, they just glow. They beam. They're like new brides, these gay men.

37:37 Drew You are so jealous, Adam.

37:38 Adam I know.

37:39 Caller He's not your stereotypical gay man. I mean, he's very-

37:42 Drew Stop, Sandra. Who cares? He's gay. Stop talking yourself into this. It's ridiculous. I know, I know. Your levels of denial are profound. Forget the Freudian implications. Just start dealing in reality for a change.

37:53 Adam Okay. And let me float this theory about that. And Drew, you tell me what you think about this one. All right. A guy can be attracted and fall in love with any woman, gay or straight, but if it's... Pete, put the nuts down. Jesus Christ. Right in front of me does this. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him.

38:20 Drew Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. I can't think with him. Oh, the humanity. Oh, the humanity.

38:29 Adam Oh, the humanity. Drew, could you concentrate watching a guy devour your good mixed nuts right in front of the glass? All right, now listen to this theory.

38:36 I know you want these nuts.

38:38 Adam Listen to this theory. A man can be attracted to a woman solely based on what she looks like, obviously, right? Women do a little of this, too, but for women, it's usually more, there's many more facets that they're attracted to in a man. So if a man was attracted to a very beautiful woman that happened to be lesbian, you could almost just say, well, look, she's a hot chick and he's into her, and she happens to go down on other chicks. But when a woman is attracted to a man who's gay and really falls in love with a guy who's gay, that's a woman who's looking to not be in a relationship.

39:13 Drew That is correct.

39:14 Adam That there is more there than that.

39:16 Drew The guy is always looking to not be in a relationship.

39:18 Adam Right. So there you go. Okay, so Sandra, don't call me Sandra, is unrealistic and needs to find a guy who she can be intimate with and needs to be open to that. And we're gonna take a break. Who are we gonna talk to when we come back, Drew?

39:33 Drew Oh, god, the damn thing just clicked off. Hold on, I'll take a second. Line 2. Line 2.

39:37 Adam We'll talk to Erin, who's 17, runs track, hasn't had her period for eight months, and wants to know if there's gonna be problems when she gets older. We'll tell her about that after this.

39:51 Caller 1-800-LOVE-191.

39:53 Adam We'll be right back. Hey, Loveline, I'm Adam. That's Dr. Drew, Dr. Drew, in rainy Minneapolis tonight.

40:34 Drew Beautiful.

40:36 Adam Yeah.

40:36 Drew Rainy.

40:37 Adam Like to see a little rain around here. Phone number 1-800.

40:41 Drew Oh, no.

40:42 Adam Yeah, we may be doing the lightning round tonight. Of course, the lightning round has been expanded, not only to check the time, but a little check of weather and traffic too. Look out for brake lights on the 405. That happens when people press the brake pedal, you know. Erin?

40:59 Caller Hello?

41:00 Adam You're 17. What's up? Oh, you run track.

41:04 Caller Yes. Pretty much, I run cross-country and track, which is during the fall and spring, and consequently, I don't get my period during those times. The only times I get it is like winter once, and it's terrible.

41:17 Adam Right.

41:17 Caller To compensate for the fact that I don't get it, you know, the other months.

41:21 Adam Hey, Drew, do women who exercise a lot lose it because of low body fat, or is there actually something involved with the exercise as well?

41:31 Drew I don't know for sure whether exercise plays a role. I know the low body fat definitely does.

41:35 Adam What about exercise in women creating higher testosterone?

41:39 Drew Interesting thought. Or mostly what it does is not so much to do with the relative effects or levels of testosterone versus estrogen, but it prevents the cycling from occurring. So the estrogen levels remain flat and the cycling doesn't occur.

41:52 Adam Is it because her legs are always moving and her vaginas are constantly in motion?

41:56 Drew Yeah, that's what I meant to say.

41:58 Adam That's what I was thinking.

41:59 Drew But Aaron, it can be a problem over the long haul, especially if it becomes associated with dropping estrogen levels, which is what Adam is referring to, which can happen. You can end up with the softening of the bones. Sometimes people will actually supplement you with estrogens. There may be an association with premature ovarian failure and infertility. So it's something to really pay attention to and maybe talk to a doctor about.

42:23 Caller Okay.

42:24 Adam How far do you run a day?

42:27 Caller Well, it depends on what sport. For cross-country, we run like six.

42:33 Adam Six miles. I respect the cross-country running, but I don't really look at it as a sport. It's just a way to keep people busy. It really is. It's like, hey, you guys, you guys all here? Yeah, see that mountain over there? Yeah, go run over there and then come back. What the hell is that?

42:50 Caller No, but I think it requires a lot of mental self-discipline and mental toughness.

42:56 Adam It does, but so does cutting on yourself. You know what I'm saying? I don't count it as a sport.

43:02 Caller Oh, wait, I have a question. Can I ask one more question?

43:04 Adam Sure.

43:05 Drew You have to answer me this though first. Have you seen someone about this yet?

43:08 Caller No, I haven't. I mean, people have warned me about it.

43:10 Drew Will you? Will you?

43:11 Caller I guess, but I don't see it as like... I mean, I'll ask my physician about it.

43:16 Drew All right, Erin, didn't I just explain... Do you want to be infertile?

43:20 Caller No, but like...

43:21 Drew Do you want to break your hip when you're 30?

43:23 Caller I will, but like, I didn't know how long I could wait, but I think this is pretty, like, wrong.

43:27 Drew All right, what's your other question?

43:29 Caller Okay, my second question is kind of like, I guess, a moral dilemma I'm kind of going through right now. Basically, for the past 17 years of my life, I mean, I haven't had like, the ideal relationships with my parents. I mean, they've never really tried to like, you know, find out stuff about like, what's going on in my life or like, how school or like, sports is going. So I guess, to a certain extent, I kind of felt neglected.

43:53 Drew But- Do you have other siblings?

43:55 Caller Yeah.

43:56 Drew How many?

43:57 Caller Two. Older. Yeah. And so, I mean, that's that. And I've pretty much gotten used to it. I mean, I'm like insensitive towards it. I mean, I'm immune to it. And this year, I'm beginning to realize that until like, I'm attempting to like, cry into my life. And for example, there are so insistent on coming to my senior year open house, which is extremely rare. Cause like, freshman year, I asked them to come and they refused.

44:23 Drew You know what, Erin, this is the Adam Corolla syndrome.

44:25 Caller Thank you.

44:26 Drew It's a, they won't attend to anything until it's too late. And then, man, it's too late. You won't have anything to do with it.

44:33 Caller Yeah. And I don't know how to respond to this because, like, Adam?

44:37 Adam Okay. Listen, she's 17 years old. And I know it feels like 100 years since they've been interested in your life and why are they turning it around now. But 17 is still a relatively young age. And the point is, is they're trying to make an effort. And there's nothing in it for you not to let them in.

44:57 Drew But see, she experiences it now as an intrusion. It's not that they're interested, if they want to invade, they want to control that kind of thing.

45:03 Adam No, I think that's you doing a little projection. I think she's angry for their lack of participation in her life in the past. And her feeling's like, look, F you, you want in now, well, I don't want you in.

45:15 Drew Too late, too late.

45:15 Adam Too late, but I'm saying, the fact that she's still in high school and they're wanting to go to her open house and stuff is not too late. It feels too late to her because she's only lived up until 17 years of age. But this isn't like she's 34 and she has a grandkid and they want to come see it now for the first time. She should let them in. Make it easy on them, make it easy on yourself, and maybe tell them about your feelings.

45:39 Drew Erin?

45:40 Adam You're 19, Erin.

45:42 Caller Hello?

45:43 Adam Yes. You met on the Internet. You're going to get engaged in a month or you've been engaged for a month?

45:50 Caller We were engaged. I met him about six months ago and I got engaged to him about a month after I met him. And he is going through a serious nervous breakdown and I was living with him and he sent me back home, back to my parents' house to protect me from his nervous breakdown.

46:12 Adam How old is he?

46:14 Caller He's 20.

46:14 Adam Okay. And are you still together but not living together?

46:19 Caller I don't know. That's what I don't know. I mean, every time we talk to each other, we still say, I love you and I miss you and all that.

46:24 Drew All right. We got to take a break here.

46:26 Adam Right. Okay. Aaron, we'll get to the particulars of this question after we take the break. We'll be back with Aaron after this. Here it is. Bottom line, it sucks being single today.

46:36 Tons of lame people and no decent prospects.

46:39 Adam Call the Dateline.

46:39 Call the Dateline. Call the Dateline.

46:41 Caller 1-877-889-DATE. Loveline will be right back, so get your problems ready. Ready.

47:31 Adam Loveline, y'all. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew over there. Minneapolis is where Drew resides tonight.

47:37 Drew That's right, that's right.

47:38 Adam Yeah, that's right.

47:40 Drew Good times.

47:40 Adam Good times over there. It's raining.

47:43 Drew Beautiful.

47:43 Adam It's like weather. Weather to sleep by.

47:45 Drew Yeah.

47:48 Adam Yeah.

47:48 Drew Too bad I'm not gonna do much of that.

47:50 Adam Hey, Drew.

47:50 Drew Yeah.

47:51 Adam As a human being living on this planet, wouldn't you say it's important to have a little range that just like it's better to sleep when it's dark out and be awake when it's light out, it's nice to have a little cold, a little weather. Every once in a while, a little rain.

48:09 Drew Absolutely. Some people that are raised in it really miss it when they don't have it. You and I really didn't get raised in it.

48:15 Adam No, we didn't, but we miss it anyway. Erin?

48:17 Drew Yes?

48:18 Adam You're 19? What's up? Oh, that's right. I talked to you. You met a guy on the net. And just to make sure people really know that I don't read these questions in advance and try to formulate some sort of answer in advance, I can never remember the last question we had even when we were in the middle of talking to him. So Erin met a guy on the net. She moved in with the dude. They got engaged. The guy had a nervous breakdown and is still having a nervous breakdown. He moved you out of the house because he didn't want to expose you to it. He's 20 years old. He says he loves you, but you don't know where the relationship stands, correct?

48:53 Drew I need some details. Where did he move you? Where were you living?

48:56 Caller I was actually living in Philadelphia.

48:58 Drew Philadelphia with him. And how long had you known him before you got married, did you say?

49:02 Caller No, we were just engaged. I had... We were friends on the Internet for years before we actually met each other. Then we met each other and we got married.

49:11 Drew Years?

49:12 Caller Well, like a year, a year and a half at the most.

49:15 Drew And how long had you been face to face spending time with each other?

49:21 Caller Well, we were together...

49:23 Caller Well, he came down to California to see me and we moved back together.

49:27 Drew How long were you out there?

49:28 Adam Okay, so that explains it.

49:31 Drew How long were you there?

49:32 Caller Six months.

49:33 Drew Six months were there. Has he had previous psychiatric hospitalizations?

49:37 Caller Not that I know of.

49:39 Adam He calls it a nervous breakdown. Is it really a nervous breakdown? Is he able to work?

49:45 Caller He's able to work but that's all he's able to do.

49:48 Drew What does that mean, nervous breakdown mean?

49:51 Caller Well, he doesn't think that he's good at anything.

49:54 Caller He thinks that work is the only thing he's good at. He's not taking care of his mother. He's got issues with his father.

50:00 Caller His father was never there when he was a kid.

50:03 Caller And now his father is back in his life.

50:05 Drew Why is that a nervous breakdown?

50:07 Adam He's got issues.

50:09 Drew Yeah, just being an idiot.

50:10 Caller He can't function right now.

50:11 Caller He can't function. He goes to work.

50:13 Drew He goes to work.

50:15 Adam He pays his bills, right?

50:17 Caller Well, he's in debt right now. If he had the money, he would be, yeah.

50:22 Drew He goes to work, right?

50:23 Caller Yes.

50:24 Drew Is he seeing someone to get treatment?

50:28 Caller No. No.

50:29 Drew Why not? Why can't you?

50:32 Caller He wouldn't go.

50:33 Caller All right, hold on a second.

50:34 Adam Hey, Drew?

50:35 Drew Yeah.

50:35 Adam You kind of thinking what I'm thinking?

50:37 Drew Yes. We're just at the very same moment you were thinking.

50:40 Adam Right. We're going to kill Pete for eating our mixed nuts. Now, he's on the Internet with this chick for a year and a half.

50:47 Drew Yes.

50:48 Adam He's a 20-year-old guy. They start having a serious thing. He moves out from Philly. They lived together for six months. He has a nervous breakdown, holding my fingers up in quotes, which is basically you take any 20-year-old dude and move him in with a chick for six months.

51:06 Drew He has a nervous breakdown.

51:07 Adam You start climbing the walls a little bit. You start freaking a little bit. He says, I'm freaking out. I have a nervous breakdown. It's got nothing to do with you, but you got to move out or you're moving back.

51:17 Drew What is with Erin that this is the best thing she can do in a relationship? Think about that.

51:22 Adam He's not attempting. I mean, a guy who's having a nervous breakdown, throws himself on the court of psychology and says, please help.

51:30 Drew Yes.

51:30 Adam You know what I mean? I can't sleep, I can't eat. I'm freaking out.

51:33 Drew By the way, the first thing that goes is work.

51:36 Adam Yes. You cannot have a nervous breakdown and show up at your work for 40 hours a week. So I'm guessing it's certainly not a real nervous breakdown. The question is, is he going through some emotional times? Yes.

51:48 Caller Yeah.

51:49 Adam A lot of guys like a woman by their side when they're going through some issues with family and things like that.

51:55 Drew Sure.

51:55 Adam I know Drew does, but he's a passionate, passionate man.

51:59 Caller Erin?

51:59 Drew Yeah.

52:00 Adam Maybe there's a little more to this. Maybe it's the relationship that he's freaking out on.

52:05 Caller Well, that's what I thought at first, but we talked about it several times before I actually left, and I've actually left and gone back to visit, and we've talked about that, and he says it really has nothing to do with me, but I don't know whether or not to believe it.

52:18 Adam What's the plan for you two? Are you going to move back in together at some point?

52:23 Caller Well, we're both waiting for each other in a way.

52:27 Adam You're waiting for him?

52:30 Caller Well, he's waiting for me too.

52:32 Caller So he says and said all his friends say, I'm still close to everyone else.

52:36 Drew What is he waiting on? He's not waiting for you, you're not anywhere. He's waiting for him.

52:41 Adam He's waiting for you to pick up the phone when he calls and tells you he's done waiting.

52:46 Drew This does not make any sense at all, Aaron.

52:47 Adam Aaron, there's a certain amount of fantasy that's involved with this in you. With this, we're waiting on each other. That's BS. You're waiting on him. He's the one who freaked out. You're ready to get on with the relationship. He's going through a tough time, so give him a little space, but just make sure you're clear on what's going on.

53:07 Drew By the way, how many 1920-year-old guys can be totally honest about stuff like this? Particularly a guy that needs to form relationships over the web.

53:14 Adam Nobody, ever. And I think, Aaron, I think you get a feeling about this that you don't really want to confront or discuss, but you got a little negative feeling about this whole thing, too, right? And it may be that the relationship, it may be more about the relationship than you think, and a little less about the breakdown. But I'm not saying it's scrapped. I'm just saying be open to the truth.

53:39 Drew Right, that's right.

53:40 Adam We're waiting on each other. No, that's not the truth. You're waiting on him. Andy?

53:45 Yeah.

53:45 Adam You're 22?

53:46 Caller Yes, I am.

53:47 Adam You know what our job on this show is? It's to make people who already feel bad feel worse. I really just realized that. You called this show because you weren't feeling too good. Now you're going to kill yourself.

53:58 Drew We'll take care of that.

53:58 Caller Thank you. Yeah.

54:00 Adam I know there were still some shreds of dignity and hope left in your life. It'll be gone in the four minutes you speak to us. Andy, you're 22.

54:06 Caller What's up?

54:07 I want to thank you guys. You guys have made lots of long drives with me.

54:10 Caller Thank you.

54:12 Anyway, Adam, you probably know about breaking the seal, having a few pints with my buddies. I want to hold out using the bathroom because I know once I do, I'm going to have to go every five, 10 minutes.

54:26 Adam Game on.

54:28 I was wondering if Dr. Drew could maybe clarify that for me.

54:31 Drew The hell are you talking about?

54:32 Adam He's talking about that sort of at least apparent syndrome of, you don't take a whiz for eight hours, you're drinking some beers and then you take that first whiz and it's game on and you're taking a whiz every 14 minutes after that.

54:47 Drew Because that's what it takes to go through you. You're waiting as long as you possibly can and now the spigots open and because it's now gone through and you have to pee and you're going to have to pee again. It's not like what you put in your mouth goes directly to your bladder. It takes a little while.

55:04 It seems like some sort of phenomenon to me though.

55:07 Adam What about that Drew? What about the witchcraft side of urination? What about the macabre, the unseen, the supernatural side of urination in your bladder?

55:16 Drew Thank you, sweet spirits. Let me see.

55:18 Adam No, listen. What it is is it takes an hour for that first six-pack to hit. Exactly.

55:26 Drew It's going.

55:27 Adam Well, not only that, but Drew, tell me if I'm wrong here. Let me give you an example. Let's say you have a kiddie pool and you turn the hose on in the kiddie pool and you're filling it up. Well, it's going to take an hour to fill up, right?

55:40 Drew Right.

55:40 Adam But once it fills up, from that point on, each bucket you pour in is going to overflow. And if you pour in a bucket, it's going to overflow every time you pour that bucket in every five minutes.

55:51 Drew Yeah, but your bladder should empty pretty completely.

55:53 Adam All right. Well, then why? Then why is it game on?

55:56 Drew Because it's going through. The buckets are starting to be tossed in now.

56:00 Adam Yeah. It's like that scene from Fantasia. That's right.

56:08 Drew That's it. Maybe it also has something to do. I mean, just thinking about peeing and, you know, hearing running water and that kind of stuff gets guys going.

56:17 Caller Thank you.

56:18 Adam All right. Drew, you got another call there?

56:20 Drew I do.

56:22 Adam Lori? Yeah. You're 19? Yeah.

56:25 Caller What's up?

56:27 Caller Well, I just moved back to California. I was living in New Jersey for the past two years. And I just got back and just like last week or the beginning of this week, I got a phone call from my ex-boyfriend back East, telling me that he has HPV. And I was wondering like what the first signs are.

56:45 Drew There are no first signs. You got to go get a pap smear and see if there's any evidence of that on the pap.

56:50 Caller And like my problem is, is I'm flat broke right now, struggling with stuff. Is there like clinics I do free tests?

56:59 Drew Yeah. You go to Planned Parenthood or I'm sure there are places you're in Redondo Beach, but try Planned Parenthood for starters. The thing is, you must have it if he has it. And that means you need to get more frequent greenings, you might as well get started up right away. Okay.

57:13 Adam Okay. Hey, good times, right?

57:15 Drew That's not a big deal. I mean, it just needs to be checked out more carefully. You need to have more frequent pap smears, and it can increase your risk of cervical cancer, but that risk can be taken away with proper follow up.

57:25 Adam That's that's warts, by the way. And oh my God. And Drew, I know you've made that phone call many, many times because you're passionate, passionate man. I thankfully have never had that to make that phone call. But I just, I couldn't imagine. You know that phone call where your doctor tells you to call all your, all your, you know, partners?

57:45 Drew It would look like that scene. It would look like the scene in Players where he picks the phone up 400 times.

57:49 Adam Yeah, and explain what you gave them.

57:52 Drew Swingers and swingers, yeah.

57:54 Adam Right, right. I mean, I, oh my God. If that happened now, I would have to have my assistant handle it. Hi, I'm calling on behalf of Mr. Corolla, Mr. Corolla's genitalia. We've, he regrets to inform you that he's contracted cramps, herpes, HPV, and shingles and scabies. He suggests that you, he will however send a car and a driver over to take you to the clinic of your choice. Thank you. Jason?

58:25 Yes.

58:26 Adam You're 27?

58:27 Caller Yes, yes I am.

58:28 Adam What's up?

58:29 Caller All right. I don't know.

58:31 Basically, my question is, I avoid confrontation, like see people in halls or like I look at them and I kind of get, I get really nervous, my heart beats fast, I like, kind of start sweating and I would like a dry mouth and stuff.

58:44 Drew Just seeing anyone as you pass them in the hall?

58:47 Sometimes, I mean, it could be a guy that I have like a, had a confrontation with before and I don't want to like confront him and my beliefs or anything like that.

58:56 Adam Well, how did you have a confrontation with him before if you avoid confrontations?

59:01 Well, I had a trick question. I don't know, I don't want to get back to that. I don't want to bring that back up.

59:10 Drew How did that happen? How did that one happen?

59:13 Adam Now, that was a fine answer to my question, by the way. How did you have a confrontation with a guy if you don't have confrontations? Well, I'm trying to avoid him so that doesn't come back up.

59:22 Drew I'm going to go at it again.

59:24 Caller Okay.

59:25 Drew How, what was the nature of that confrontation? How did that go down?

59:28 I basically kind of disrespected him away and then I tried to apologize for it.

59:33 Drew Hey listen, hey, hey, hey. What exactly happened?

59:37 I stuck his hand up in his face.

59:39 Drew You did?

59:40 Yeah, and I was talking to somebody else at the time.

59:42 Drew Why did you do that?

59:44 Because his question or comment was unimportant.

59:47 Adam So it's funny, Jason's got a little, he's a little angry for a guy that doesn't like confrontation.

59:52 Drew No, he's very aggressive and he's afraid of what he's going to unleash in himself, I think.

59:56 Adam Really? I don't call it very aggressive, Drew.

1:00:00 Drew I think so.

1:00:01 Adam Are you angry, Jason?

1:00:03 Uh, no, I don't think so.

1:00:05 Adam Well, why would you stick a hand up in a guy's face who was, if you're scared of confrontation, you're not very aggressive.

1:00:13 Drew And talk about disrespecting him and the guy was just talking.

1:00:16 Right, I don't know, I guess things happen in my life that I'm just not, it's just starting to go out of control and I start worrying about everything. I don't know. I don't want to have like, I don't know, just kind of like, I don't want to have people get in my way. And I, and I, so I just kind of put them out, put them to the side.

1:00:39 Adam Okay, yeah, so here's the deal, Jason, you called because you said you were like, you had a fear of confrontation, but really you're scared of how you're gonna act in front of other people when a situation arises.

1:00:51 Caller Would that be somewhat like a co-dependency? Like I don't, uh...

1:00:54 Drew No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. You should see someone though, Jason. This can be troubling. You have trouble holding a job, that kind of thing?

1:01:01 Caller No, that's not a problem.

1:01:03 Drew What do you do for work?

1:01:05 Caller I'm in the military and I work at a large communications company. And I go to school.

1:01:11 Caller First of all, don't join the military.

1:01:13 Adam Alright, so here's the deal, this doesn't sound like this is killing you or destroying your life, but it's an issue that you want to deal with. You're 27 years old and it's time to start dealing with it, right?

1:01:27 Caller It's not a big thing, it's not really a big thing, but there are occasions in my life where I just start freaking out about small little things or...

1:01:34 Adam Alright, I put them on hold.

1:01:38 Drew There's something going on with Jason.

1:01:39 Adam There's something going on. It's not really a fear of confrontation. Oh, no, no. There's a little anger behind it.

1:01:46 Drew There's like an antisocial quality to all that.

1:01:49 Caller Right, right.

1:01:50 Adam And then there's a fear and there's a whole bunch of stuff. So anyway, here's the point. Therapy, therapy, and a little therapy.

1:01:57 Caller Thank you.

1:01:58 Adam Sarah?

1:01:59 Caller Yeah.

1:01:59 Adam You're 17?

1:02:00 Caller Yeah.

1:02:01 Caller What's up?

1:02:03 Caller I went to my gynecologist recently and they told me that I was diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome.

1:02:10 Drew Did they suggest you watch your diet and learn about diabetes, that sort of thing? Did they talk about that at all?

1:02:19 Caller Well, I took a blood test the second time that I had gone, so I could take a blood test because I was on birth control, and then I was taken off of it for a while. I've been off of it for three weeks now. And she said because the levels of the hormones in my ovaries are in balance.

1:02:38 Drew That's right. So you attend to form cysts, and you won't cycle normally.

1:02:42 Caller Right.

1:02:42 Drew Did they talk? I'm going to ask my question again.

1:02:44 Adam Hold on, Drew. Let's do a little Loveline reenactment.

1:02:47 Caller I just love this show.

1:02:48 Adam There's got to be something wrong with the phone lines. Go ahead. I'm going to play Young College Sarah, okay?

1:02:53 Caller Okay. All right.

1:02:53 Drew So Sarah, did they?

1:02:54 Adam No, no, no.

1:02:55 Caller Let me start.

1:02:57 Adam My doctor said I have polycystic ovarian syndrome.

1:03:01 Drew Okay. A syndrome where you'll attend to form multiple cysts and not cycle normally. And did they begin talking to you about your diet and about educating you about diabetes?

1:03:11 Adam I took a blood test. And the doctor said that I wasn't cycling normally.

1:03:19 Drew You went back for the blood test?

1:03:21 Caller I took a blood test.

1:03:26 Adam I mean, okay, I may have fudged it a little bit, but that's basically how our conversations on this show go.

1:03:32 Drew Yeah, it's nice.

1:03:33 Adam Now, Drew, the only thing I can think of is that people can't hear you correctly. Drew, do you ever feel like a ghost in a room? Yes.

1:03:43 Drew You're talking, yelling at the people, and they can't hear you?

1:03:45 Adam The world is having a seance, and all you can do is make the drapes blow a little bit and maybe blow out a candle every once in a while, but you can never get your message across. You're like Houdini yelling at his wife.

1:03:58 Caller Yes. Yes.

1:04:00 Caller Yes.

1:04:02 Caller Hey, Sarah.

1:04:04 Adam So what about diabetes? Did your doctor talk to you about that?

1:04:07 Caller Oh, okay.

1:04:08 Drew All right, that's another important part of this syndrome is that you'll tend to be what's called insulin resistant, and it increases your risk of diabetes when you get older, and there's a lot of focus now being put on dietary management and exercise when you're young, and they might also put you on the birth control pill to keep you cycling. There's a lot of information out on the web about this. The Brigham and Women's Hospital in Boston I think has a big sort of PCO, Polycystic Ovarian Disease, a site. So check that out, okay?

1:04:37 Caller All right.

1:04:39 Adam I put her on hold because she got all that. Hi Drew, you got another call lined up there, Chan?

1:04:45 Drew There we go.

1:04:45 Adam Let's talk to Becky who's 27.

1:04:47 Caller Becky?

1:04:48 Adam Hi.

1:04:48 Caller What's up?

1:04:49 Basically, I just had a question. I have two siblings, an older sister and a younger brother, and we have a mother who's kind of, she's done some very strange things and we have experienced some abuse, but not like run-of-the-mill abuse. I mean, we're talking like, in addition to emotional abuse, she used to like stage burglaries and at some point she set her house on fire.

1:05:14 Drew This is sort of exotic abuse, exotica.

1:05:17 Adam Give her credit for flair.

1:05:20 Well, we've given her plenty of credit, but what our question was is there's something other than schizophrenia or something like that that can cause this, because we don't know.

1:05:30 Drew Well, of course, of course. There are hundreds of psychiatric diagnoses that can cause peculiar behavior. Why isn't she evaluated or hadn't she been evaluated?

1:05:37 Well, she's very intelligent and every time that she's ever gone to a psychologist or gone for help, for some reason she winds up counseling the psychologist.

1:05:49 Drew I mean, that's BS. That's BS, Becky. That's what she tells you. Believe me, that's not what happens.

1:05:55 Well, that's what we get.

1:05:57 Drew That's what she says. So that kind of thinking and that kind of distortion suggests something called a personality disorder. And if she's real wild and chaotic, it's probably in the borderline or narcissistic category. So you can sort of look up borderline personality disorder and you'll probably see a lot of stuff that sounds kind of familiar to you.

1:06:15 Adam Hey, Becky. I've contacted a couple of drifters. I'm actually interviewing now. I'm going to hand them off to some of my family members. And a guy told me that if we do it in a kind of a group rate kind of thing, that we can get a break. Drew's already put his dad on the list. No. Yeah, it's true because it's so cheap. So you're up in the year in Upland? Yeah. Because this guy, he doesn't want to drive that far. But I think if you could get your mom out here to more of the Pasadena, North Hollywood area, we could proudly take her out too.

1:06:48 Caller Okay.

1:06:49 Adam Because at this point, that's really... You're 27, you're out of the house. She's there driving the old man crazy? Or who's there?

1:06:58 Caller She's actually been married six times.

1:07:02 Adam She's how old?

1:07:03 Caller She is 54, 53.

1:07:06 Drew This is like bipolar with a personality disorder. And you need to get her treated.

1:07:11 Adam Is she married still?

1:07:12 Caller She, right now, she, well the last husband she had was younger than I. And she met him on the internet. She met this fellow that she's with now on the internet. And I mean it's just, it goes on and on. I can't actually have contact with her right now just because I have a lot of anger that I have to deal with.

1:07:28 Adam Right. But here's what I'm saying. She sounds like Barretta's wife. You know what I mean? At a certain point, don't we just put someone down? I mean, and Drew, how many? Now she's a youngish mom in the sense that if she was like 68, 70, it'd be like, oh, just Christ, just pad the room and call the life. There's 50 something is still some hope. But on the other hand, Drew, realistically, you know what I mean? This woman's been nuts her whole life.

1:07:58 Drew No, actually borderlines tend to settle down in the 40s and 50s and 60s. They tend to get better all of a sudden, spontaneously even. So if it's just that, she may look forward to some improvement. But it sounds like there's some mood disturbance here too. And again, that can be treated.

1:08:14 Adam All right. But Becky, do not make it. She's already ruined the beginning part of your life. The first third of your life. Do not let her ruin the second two thirds of your life.

1:08:24 Caller Oh, no.

1:08:25 Adam Do you know what I'm saying?

1:08:25 Caller Right.

1:08:26 Adam You do what you think is responsible and prudent. But if she's not going to accept it, let her just spin out.

1:08:33 Caller Right. That's what we have to let her do now. Because it's beyond us. She doesn't take responsibility for any of these things that she's done.

1:08:40 Adam Right. Right. And like I'm saying, if you want in on the drifter thing, that's going to go down. Well, of course, I can't say the exact date of the hit on the air, but it'll be before the end of the year. And I'm going to try to line it out. I'm going to try to do it this year before the Super Bowl.

1:08:53 Caller I'll have to keep that in mind.

1:08:55 Caller Yeah. Okay.

1:08:56 Adam All right, Becky.

1:08:56 Caller All right.

1:08:57 Adam Thanks.

1:08:57 Drew Good times.

1:08:58 Adam What do we got on that? We got, Drew, you're on that?

1:09:00 Drew We got a timeout here.

1:09:02 Caller We got to take a break?

1:09:03 Drew Yeah.

1:09:04 Adam Okay. When we come back, who are we going to speak to, Drew?

1:09:07 Drew I thought we'd talk up with Dane from Oklahoma.

1:09:12 Adam Dane. Dane is 22 when having sex with girlfriend. Other stuff comes out of him.

1:09:18 Caller That's just seeming.

1:09:20 Drew It comes out of somebody. It doesn't say who.

1:09:22 Adam Oh, make them out of the girlfriend.

1:09:24 Drew All right.

1:09:24 Adam After this. Hey, Loveline, Adam, that's Dr. Drew over there in Minneapolis. We are doing a lightning round tonight.

1:10:11 Caller Yeah.

1:10:15 Adam Time for this nation to get back to the business of lightning. And lightning round is coming on.

1:10:22 Caller Yeah.

1:10:22 Adam And just new additions to the lightning round, not only the time and the math done for the time.

1:10:27 Caller Drew, you there?

1:10:29 Drew No, that's Dane, who I think has hung up on us.

1:10:31 Adam Okay, good. Not only that, but traffic and weather. It's been added to the lightning round. And I'm thinking in weeks to come, maybe a surf report.

1:10:41 Caller Yeah!

1:10:45 Drew Ace Rockolla doing a surf report. You'll have to have a surf report to call in.

1:10:49 Adam Yeah, I should have a guy. I should have a guy call in.

1:10:52 Caller Right, right.

1:10:54 Drew Oh, Dane is not there.

1:10:56 Caller That's right.

1:10:57 Adam Dusty Trunks will call in. You have to have like a really bad radio name.

1:11:02 Caller All right.

1:11:05 Adam Thank you.

1:11:05 Caller Hi, this is Adam.

1:11:06 Caller Please leave a message.

1:11:08 Adam Hey, Jackass, go to bed.

1:11:10 Caller Okay.

1:11:11 Drew Brian.

1:11:13 Caller Yeah.

1:11:14 Adam Hey, Drew, you ever do those things? You don't live alone, so you don't do that thing where you call your message machine at home and leave yourself messages to remind you to do stuff when you get home?

1:11:24 Drew I do stuff like that, though.

1:11:26 Adam Nobody does that? Sure, you do.

1:11:27 Drew No, I've done stuff like that.

1:11:28 Adam Yeah, everybody does that.

1:11:29 Drew I do that in my office.

1:11:30 Adam No, here's what happens. Here's what happens. You're sitting at work. You're sitting in your office. For me, it's a man show and somebody says, remember, you got to bring your yearbook in tomorrow because we need a young photo of you or blah, blah, blah, and you're sitting in your office and you're thinking, I'm going straight from here to Loveline. I'm never going to remember that goddamn yearbook. So you call your house and you leave.

1:11:51 Hi, this is Adam. Please leave a message.

1:11:53 Adam So here's what I do. Okay, so it's like I always throw in something like, hey, good looking, hey, hot stuff, loving you.

1:11:59 Caller You don't.

1:12:00 Adam Yeah, I do. I do to build myself up when I get home.

1:12:02 Caller You're good.

1:12:03 Adam People love you. You're powerful, strong men. Women cannot resist you. Men fear you. Oh, and don't forget your 8th grade yearbook. And then I hang up. But here's the beauty of me. An hour and a half later, I'm sitting at my desk, I get bored, I decide to check my messages. No, there's one message. Who is it? It's me telling me to remember to get my yearbook. Now I have to cancel my own message and then call back and leave me another message. Or I could save it, but if I save it, I'm not going to check my save messages when I get back. You never feel lamer than when you call your house to check your own messages. And the only message on there is you leaving you a message. Thank you. Brian, you really feel like Ace.

1:12:44 Caller Go ahead.

1:12:45 Drew I feel like Ace is just hearing the story.

1:12:47 Caller What's up, Brian?

1:12:48 Adam The real scary part is when the first thing is, is I go, that dude sounds like me, like the first three syllables.

1:12:55 Caller All right.

1:12:55 Adam Go ahead there, Brian.

1:12:56 Caller You're 15.

1:12:58 Caller My girlfriend, she lives in Louisiana and I live in California. We're really close in everything, but I don't know if I should dump her for a girl that was closer to me or if I should keep with her because this summer we get together.

1:13:12 Adam You can't get out to Louisiana once a week or so?

1:13:15 Caller No.

1:13:16 Adam No. How did you meet her?

1:13:21 Caller How did you meet?

1:13:22 Adam You understand it's interesting that you're going out with someone at age 15, someone who lives in Louisiana.

1:13:29 Caller Well, she originally lived here in California and she moved out there because she had to live with her grandparents or something like that.

1:13:35 Drew So you were dating her or seeing her out here?

1:13:37 Caller Yeah.

1:13:38 Adam Yeah. This is doomed.

1:13:40 Drew Yeah. I'm afraid so.

1:13:41 Adam And you're dating someone who had to move in with her grandparents or something?

1:13:44 Caller It's temporary. She's moving back here though.

1:13:46 Adam Horrible sign.

1:13:47 Caller Horrible.

1:13:49 Drew Why does she have to move in with her grandparents?

1:13:50 Caller I don't know. Just something with her family. I don't get it really.

1:13:54 Drew Yeah.

1:13:54 Caller That's what I'm talking about.

1:13:55 Drew Yeah. It's a bad sign. I agree. That's why I was giving him a chance to tell me something. You know, Dad is now an ambassador to Yugoslavia or something. No.

1:14:04 Adam Dad is an ambassador to the drunk tank in Montrose. All right. So, Brian, you're 15. Forget it.

1:14:12 Caller Okay.

1:14:12 Adam She lives in Louisiana for Christ's sake.

1:14:14 Caller Thanks.

1:14:15 Caller Okay.

1:14:15 Caller Bye.

1:14:16 Caller Bye.

1:14:16 Drew Good time.

1:14:17 Caller I think you've listened to us. I do. Who's next?

1:14:20 Drew He knew that was the answer.

1:14:21 Adam Darren?

1:14:21 Caller Yeah.

1:14:22 Adam What's up?

1:14:23 Caller What's up, Dave?

1:14:24 Adam I may work a little surf report into tonight.

1:14:26 Drew I think it's worthwhile.

1:14:27 Adam Okay.

1:14:28 Drew I do really wonder what the surf is. I mean, it's coming in on November and all.

1:14:32 Caller Right. Go ahead.

1:14:34 Caller Oh, yeah. I mean, my problem is that every time my girlfriend and I go try to have sex, like, I mean, I can get it up and nothing like that. I mean, everything. I mean, it's just every time I go try to have sex, it just goes straight down.

1:14:47 Drew Are you on a medication?

1:14:49 Caller No, no medication at all.

1:14:50 Drew And no medical problems?

1:14:51 Caller No, no medical problems at all.

1:14:53 Drew And are you nervous about this relationship?

1:14:55 Caller Excuse me?

1:14:55 Drew Are you nervous about this happening?

1:14:57 Caller Well, I mean, I've been with her for about 3 years. The first 2 years, it was just us messing around, nothing like that. I mean, no sex or anything like that. But it just lasts like 6, maybe 4 months. Every time we try to have sex, it's just straight down.

1:15:12 Drew So you've never had sex with her successfully?

1:15:14 Caller Oh, never.

1:15:16 Drew And you started dating her at 21?

1:15:18 Caller Yeah.

1:15:19 Drew And 2 years, no sex?

1:15:20 Adam 3 years.

1:15:21 Caller Oh, yeah. 2 years, no sex. I mean, it was just straight messing around. I mean, we communicate. I mean, we are like, we are like, I don't know how to explain it, but we communicate. We can both, we can...

1:15:37 Adam He used the s-word, so we had to cut you off.

1:15:40 Caller Hey, Darren?

1:15:41 Caller Yeah?

1:15:42 Adam Are you a religious person?

1:15:43 Caller Oh, no, no, not religious. I don't believe in God at all.

1:15:45 Caller Good, good boy.

1:15:48 Drew Is this relationship super intense for you? Is there something about it that's sort of overwhelming?

1:15:53 Caller I mean, I guess, I mean, I don't want to disappoint her.

1:15:56 Drew Yeah, it sounds like you just put a lot of pressure on yourself. You know, when the relationship has been going on so long, you sort of, and you're building up to this act, it must be very difficult, very anxiety-provoking, making you very nervous to try to perform. After all, it's just another person you're just trying to express some intimacy for.

1:16:16 Adam Why is it that you didn't have sex for two or three years?

1:16:20 Caller We were friends for about four years before we even got together.

1:16:24 Drew Once again, no answer.

1:16:26 Adam Hold on, Loveline recreation.

1:16:28 Drew Why didn't you have sex for those first two to three years?

1:16:32 Adam We were friends for, you know, four years before we got together. I'm just repeating it exactly how it comes back to us. It really sounds bizarre when you hear it told again. I never know how filthy I am until once in a while I have to read some kind of transcript of something I said and then I just realized what a disgusting filthy and unimaginative person I am.

1:16:57 Drew I'm glad you realized that.

1:16:58 Adam Thank you.

1:16:59 Drew That's good.

1:17:00 Adam So Darren, the reason you guys didn't have sex for two or three years is because you were friends before you got together.

1:17:09 Drew You understand that doesn't make sense?

1:17:10 Adam No, no. It makes perfect sense to me now.

1:17:11 Caller I mean, no, I mean, I mean, I love her. I mean, she's not, to me, she's not a friend anymore.

1:17:16 Drew I understand that. So, she stopped being a friend about three years ago.

1:17:19 Caller Oh, two.

1:17:20 Adam Two years ago. And why didn't you have sex for the two years that you dated?

1:17:25 Caller I have no idea. I mean, I mean, it's just like, I mean, I don't know how to explain it, really. I mean, we were just, we were friends. I mean, I don't know how to approach her. I mean, I mean, it's not like one thing.

1:17:34 Adam Okay. All right. All right. So, now, now...

1:17:37 Drew This is that weird thing. They're in Weirdville.

1:17:39 Adam Yeah.

1:17:40 Drew You know?

1:17:40 Adam Right.

1:17:41 Drew Past Friendville.

1:17:42 Adam Has your penis worked in other relationships?

1:17:45 Caller Oh, yeah. I've never had a problem at all. Just when I got with her, that's the only problem I ever had.

1:17:49 Drew Yeah. But this woman, you idealize. She's perfect. She's wonderful. She's all these things that you... Yeah. But she's just another person.

1:17:55 Caller Yeah.

1:17:56 Drew And she really... I think you need to figure out a way to relax and be more realistic about this woman.

1:18:02 Caller Okay.

1:18:03 Drew And when you are not so nervous about it...

1:18:05 Caller She's just another girl to me, then, right?

1:18:07 Caller Well, I don't...

1:18:08 Caller I mean, don't... Not that she's, like, another girl, but, I mean, like, she's not... She's... I don't know how to explain it, but...

1:18:14 Drew She's not a deity. She's not somebody perfect. She's somebody you care about very, very much. But don't build it up so much to such a big deal that it becomes overwhelming to you.

1:18:23 Adam Right. Your penis does not want to have sex with superstars. Your brain does, but your penis is freaked out.

1:18:31 Drew Yeah.

1:18:32 Adam You make her into the Virgin Mary, and your penis is going to freak.

1:18:36 Drew Right.

1:18:37 Adam And Darren, just relax. And I don't think there's anything physically wrong with him. I think he's freaked himself out because he's probably been pining for her for eight years. And now he's naked with her and he doesn't know what to do. You know, you can only, Drew, tell me if this is true. If you fantasize about nailing somebody for too many years before you actually get a shot at them, it screws you up in a big way.

1:19:02 Drew Oh, yeah, man.

1:19:03 Adam You know what I'm saying, brother? No, you know what I mean? Dane, I mean, this guy's probably been wanting to hump this chick for six, eight years and now he's naked with her and he's freaked.

1:19:14 Drew Yeah, it takes you out of reality.

1:19:16 Adam Right. Uh, Dane?

1:19:19 Drew Dane's back.

1:19:19 Adam Oh, right. What's up there, Dane?

1:19:21 Caller Oh, not much. I got cut off on that last one and the phone died. Something.

1:19:24 Caller Okay.

1:19:25 Caller The question was, when we start to get into the intercourse and a few minutes into it, it's like, there's other, I don't know, it's hard to explain, but there's other substances or fluids coming out besides gum. I'm curious of what in the world it could be. I don't know. She says she's not peeing on me. I mean, I don't know.

1:19:42 Drew Coming out of her.

1:19:43 Caller Yeah, exactly. And nothing to do with me, I hope.

1:19:47 Drew Is it when she's orgasming?

1:19:49 Caller I mean, no. I mean, it could happen at the beginning. It's happened afterwards. I mean, it's just enduring. I mean, I don't know, just periodically, it'll, I mean, whatever this is, it'll happen. I'm not sure. She said, and also, I guess in a way, I mean, we'll start out and everything will be fine. She's a very clean girl, you know, and it doesn't smell. And all of a sudden, the smell will start to, you know, build up. And then before you know it, it's just unbearable. And she feels uncomfortable and doesn't want to have sex, you know, because of it.

1:20:15 Adam The smell is unbearable.

1:20:17 Caller I guess you could say, I don't know.

1:20:18 Drew Does the fluid that comes out smell?

1:20:21 Caller Yeah, that's what causes the smell, yes. But it's not come. I can promise you that. I know the difference a little bit. Yeah.

1:20:29 Adam I like a guy who knows the difference between come and urine.

1:20:33 Drew Oh, it smokes a lot of pot.

1:20:36 Adam Wow, do you smoke a lot of pot? Wow, you really smoke a lot of weed, Dave. Me?

1:20:42 Caller Yeah. I can say that.

1:20:44 Drew We know it, boy.

1:20:46 Caller He says, that's why we...

1:20:47 Caller Yeah.

1:20:49 Caller No, drugs are bad for you, sir.

1:20:53 Drew You're living proof of it. You're living proof of it.

1:20:56 Adam Dane, when you laugh and nothing comes out, when you go...

1:21:04 Caller What is it about weed that gives you that laugh?

1:21:06 Adam I mean, Dane is a 22-year-old guy. It's not like his lungs and his throat at this point.

1:21:12 Drew No, it's his brain.

1:21:13 Adam It's his brain? Well, it doesn't let you autoblyze when you laugh?

1:21:17 Drew I don't know, but certainly we hear it.

1:21:19 Adam Okay. If she has some discharge and some odor, she may have some kind of infection.

1:21:24 Drew No, it really sounds like this is some sort of secretion she has during sexual arousal. It's sort of a female ejaculate.

1:21:30 Adam Because it's being summoned.

1:21:31 Drew Yeah.

1:21:31 Adam Is that what you're saying?

1:21:32 Drew From the bowels of hell? It's being produced. Right. For whatever reason, her fluids have a certain odor and it's troubling to both of them.

1:21:40 Caller All right.

1:21:41 Adam Should she just swing by the gyno just to float this one?

1:21:45 Drew Sure. But I don't think this is infection. I really don't.

1:21:47 Caller All right.

1:21:48 Adam We're going to take ourselves a break and we're going to come back with the lightning round.

1:21:52 Caller And the surf report.

1:21:54 Adam Well, that will be part of surf, traffic, weather, of course, the time and the time squared because we do the math on the time because that's important in radio and the newly added surf report to the lightning round after this.

1:22:10 Drew Hello?

1:22:10 Caller Is this Loveline?

1:22:11 Caller Call 1-800-LOVE-191. Adam and Dr. Drew will be right back.

1:23:16 Caller Smackdown in the middle of the Lighting Round. That's the fastest 14 minutes radio. Let's check the time real fast for a move on here. That's Dr. Drew over there doing good, hanging down. Hot, hot, hot. Passion, passion, passion.

1:23:28 Adam It is 1145 straight up.

1:23:32 Caller That's 15 minutes away from the top of the hour. We're going to hop back on the phone to talk to you about your love. From first quick check of weather.

1:23:41 Adam Diamond bar coming in 61, Montclair 63, Montclair, Montrose, Eagle Rock 54, Norco 59, Thousand Oaks, Akul 46 degrees, Bellflower 55, Corona 57, San Luis Obispo, 61 degrees, North Hollywood, Grand Rapids 46, Kenoga Park, Riverside, and Upland all coming in respectively, 62, 61, 59 degrees.

1:24:00 Caller Let's check traffic real fast.

1:24:01 Adam First of all, let's check the time.

1:24:02 Caller Now let's get back to the traffic. Jack Knight truck track trailer on the 118, it's all slow and go over there. Watch out for brake lights on the Cajon Pass.

1:24:11 Adam That means people are touching the brake pedal and the lights are lighting up.

1:24:14 Caller Look out for brake lights on the 405, the 110, the 170, the Debris on the road on the 405. Right as you get off there, Lafayette, everybody, the airport is there.

1:24:22 Adam And California Highway Patrol, Chippews Road and Traffic Brake, eastbound, pardon me, westbound 210.

1:24:28 Caller All right, let's hop the phones first. Tweaky hole, baby, wow! Let's get a quick surfers part.

1:24:33 Adam We got a Ventura coming in, Western Leash as well. Zuma Beach overhead. Trestles, three to five with sets of five. Redondo Beach coming in two to four sets of six.

1:24:43 Drew Ace, you're doing your own surf report?

1:24:47 Caller Ace!

1:24:48 Caller I know I should be doing my own stuff. All right, let's hop back in the phones. Show us some real rage there, Ace. First, let's check the time.

1:24:56 Adam It's 1146 and 30 seconds.

1:24:59 Caller That is 13 minutes and 30 seconds away from the top of the hour straight up.

1:25:02 Adam You're smacked in the middle of the fast 14 and a half minutes.

1:25:04 Caller Reyl, on Ace Rockolla, the good ol buddy, Loveline by the hot, hot, hot.

1:25:07 Adam Colleen, call from Seattle 23.

1:25:09 Caller What's going on, Westwood Rockolls? What's happening there?

1:25:11 Caller International.

1:25:12 Adam Yes, Rob, we're going all over the country.

1:25:14 Caller Yes, what's up there?

1:25:15 Adam We're all the way in Seattle. Because you're in Seattle and you're calling us.

1:25:18 Caller You're hearing us on a radio station.

1:25:19 Adam What's on there, Colleen?

1:25:20 Caller Hi.

1:25:21 Caller 23 years old, yeah.

1:25:23 Caller Yeah, I'm just calling because I went to the gynecologist and they told me that I have chlamydia.

1:25:32 Drew Right. Right.

1:25:32 Caller I'm with you.

1:25:34 Caller The only sexual experience I've ever had was when I was 14.

1:25:39 Caller Twinkie hole, baby.

1:25:41 Drew How old was the guy?

1:25:43 Caller 22.

1:25:43 Adam He's 22. Hold on a second, Drew. Let it remind me. 22 degrees in Upland. It's freakishly cold out there. Montclair checking in 61, Montrose 63, Pasadena is coming in to 56, Eagle Rock area 54, Nocor 49. 49 degrees in Norco, Thousand Oaks 46 degrees. We're going to check them in the weather and traffic later on. Is Colleen still on the air there? Colleen is coming in 23 years old.

1:26:08 Drew No surprise that guy might have chlamydia. Chlamydia is something you can have for years and not know it. In fact, that's how it does most of its damage. That's how it can impact on fertility so profoundly. It stays in the tubes and damages the tube function.

1:26:18 Adam Speaking of damage, there's still debris on the 405 in the Latvian air exit. Slow and go.

1:26:22 Caller Look out for brake lights on the code pass.

1:26:25 Adam Coming to 118. Slow and jackknife. Big rig up there.

1:26:28 Caller Check the time real fast.

1:26:30 Adam No, it's 1148 straight up.

1:26:31 Caller 12 minutes away from the top of the hour. The woodsy hour.

1:26:34 Caller 12 minutes.

1:26:34 Caller I'm Ace Rockolla. We got a little partner there, Dr. Drew.

1:26:37 Caller Somebody's coming over to Twin Cities, Minneapolis, Minneapolis, St. Paul.

1:26:40 Adam Riverside coming in at 61, Upland 59.

1:26:42 Caller Let's get back to the phone and speak to Joe.

1:26:44 Adam Joe's 20 years old. Joe, what's going on? Inspector, having a little lightning round. Fastest 14 minutes away. Oh, by the way?

1:26:50 Caller Yeah.

1:26:54 Caller My problem is I have social anxiety disorder.

1:26:57 Adam That's right. Hey, Joe, Joe, I could give you the answer, but I'd have to kill you. So now seriously, folks, let's check the time real fast. 11 48 and 40 seconds. That's 11 minutes and 20 seconds away from the top of the hour straight up. Go ahead, Joe, what's the question?

1:27:14 Caller Social anxiety?

1:27:15 Caller I was taking Paxil. And that wasn't working very well for me. It started to taper off at the end and I was like getting really shaky if I missed a day and stuff like that.

1:27:23 Drew Right, there is a withdrawal from Paxil.

1:27:25 Adam It's a long go in the 118, yeah.

1:27:26 Caller And so I switched to Will Butrin and Prozac. Is that a bad combination?

1:27:32 Adam CHP's run a traffic break over 210 westbound, by the way.

1:27:36 Drew Look out for that. Mattress in the number three lane?

1:27:38 Adam Disabled motorist in the number four lane. That's the left lane.

1:27:43 Caller Disabled motorist. I always like that one. The half-disadmin, disabled motorist. Let's check the time real fast.

1:27:54 Adam 1149 in 30 seconds.

1:27:57 Caller That's 10 minutes and 30 seconds away from the diamond bar. Bellflower 59, Corona 57. Overhead at Trestles, everyone. And Redondo coming in with a set of two or four to the west. What's up, Joe?

1:28:11 Drew So Joe, Prozac-Well-Beatron is a very powerful combination. And you know, but it's good. You have ADD also.

1:28:17 Adam Yeah, they have ADD. CHP run a traffic break on the 110 southbound.

1:28:22 Caller Yeah. What's that do? Let's check the time real fast.

1:28:29 Adam 1150 straight up. 10 minutes away from the top of the hour.

1:28:31 Caller 12 minutes away. I'm Ace Rockolla. Good ol Labardo over there. Dr. Drew.

1:28:35 Adam Upland checking in at 59.

1:28:38 Caller Riverside coming in at 61.

1:28:39 Caller Kenoga Park, 62.

1:28:40 Adam North Hollywood, 66.

1:28:42 Caller San Luis Obispo, 61. Corona, Corona Del Mar area coming in at 57 degrees. Bellflower, well Bellflower, just go outside. You'll know what temperature it is.

1:28:50 Adam Thousand Oaks coming in at 46, 49. Norco.

1:28:53 Caller Diego Rockwell, Pasadena coming in at 55.

1:28:56 Adam Cajon Pass, Sloan Goat. Look out for break lights.

1:28:58 Caller Let's hop back on the phone, sir.

1:29:00 Adam Let's speak to Kelly. Kelly, 27 years old, I thought her name was Kelly.

1:29:04 Caller Yeah, hi.

1:29:08 Caller What's up there, David?

1:29:10 Caller Well, I gotta tell you, I love your show.

1:29:12 Caller Thank you, David.

1:29:14 Caller I've only been listening for a short while.

1:29:15 Caller That is a new listener for the first time.

1:29:16 Caller Listener for the first time.

1:29:19 Caller All right, hold on a second, Kelly.

1:29:22 Adam I checked the time real fast. It's 1150 and 55 seconds.

1:29:26 Caller It's nine minutes and five seconds away from the top.

1:29:28 Caller They are straight up.

1:29:29 Adam I'm Ace Rockolla. Dr. Drew, Kelly, go ahead. 27 years old, calling in on San Jose. Yes, that's right. We're live nationwide. We got a 500,000 watt flame thrower coming live every night nationwide, nationwide, live, live nationwide. 27 years old, go ahead.

1:29:47 Caller Wow.

1:29:49 Caller It's really hard to keep up. I'm really surprised you put me through, because I absolutely hate the Lightning Round.

1:29:55 Caller Hold on a second. Hold on a second.

1:29:57 Drew God bless you, Kelly.

1:29:58 Adam Leslie, I don't like the Lightning Round either, but we got to do some good radio, everyone. So, Eagle Rock checking in at 54 degrees, Norco, 49, Thousand Oaks, 46, Bellflower, 55 degrees.

1:30:09 Caller Debris on the 405 over in Lafayette.

1:30:11 Adam They're cleaning that up, but it's slow and go all the way out to the shape.

1:30:14 Drew There's some furniture in all lanes.

1:30:16 Adam Yeah. There's disabled motorists in the number 3 light on the 118. That's northbound. And look out for brake lights on the 405. Kelly?

1:30:25 Caller Yeah. You hate the light around.

1:30:29 Caller Well, while I'm here, I might as well ask questions.

1:30:31 Caller Hold on a second. Yeah, good idea.

1:30:33 Adam I got to check the time real fast. You understand?

1:30:36 Caller It's been a while.

1:30:37 Adam It's 11, it's 1152 and 15 seconds. That's seven minutes and 45 seconds away from the time.

1:30:45 Caller I'm Ace Rockolla, the good ol part of Dr. Drew.

1:30:47 Caller Hot, hot, hot, pageant, pageant.

1:30:48 Caller Kelly, what's your question?

1:30:51 Caller I got to give up.

1:30:52 Caller All right.

1:30:52 Caller Give up on yourself.

1:30:54 Adam Let me tell you something. The CHP had just learned it's running a traffic brake on the westbound 210. So look out for brake lights over there. Let's hop back on the phones. I'll give you some temperature. Norco coming in at 46, Corona 57. Hop back on the phones. Overhead at Trestles, sets of five and eight feet over there. So you guys want to get out there, catch that swell northeastern. Let's hop on the phones.

1:31:13 Drew What's the set interval there, Ray?

1:31:14 Adam Set interval is coming about every 12 waves. They're coming in about overhead, like about 12 minutes coming out of overhead. Ventura's swell is coming out of the west, I'll tell you that. Like I said, Zoom was overhead. Trestles, Redondo Beach.

1:31:24 Drew I heard there's a storm down in Baja that's driving.

1:31:26 Adam Storm down in Baja, which is causing the wave along with the amazing gravitational pull of the moon.

1:31:31 Caller All right, let's hop back to the phone.

1:31:32 Adam I like when they tell you what the goddamn, what's causing the wave. Like that's an important element of surfing. All right, I know, I got to know what the wave's motivation is or otherwise, I'm not getting on it. You tell me some fat guy did a cannonball off of Costa Rica, I'm not going in.

1:31:50 Caller Let's hop back to the phones real fast. Let me check the time real fast.

1:31:53 Adam Drew, hot, hot, hot, 1153 and 30 seconds, six minutes and 30 seconds away from the top there. These weather just in Bellflower, 55 Norco, 49 Eagle Rock, 54 Pasadena coming in at 56. Cool, cool, 61 in San Luis Obispo, and it's a slow and go on the 118, so look out for brake lights.

1:32:14 Caller Drew, you want to hop back in the 117?

1:32:19 Adam Overhead is trestles, two and four feet, intervals 12 minutes.

1:32:22 Caller Yep, yep, Drew, 117.

1:32:27 Adam All right, we're going to take ourselves a break. I'm going to come back with more weather, traffic, surf report and all that and the time and the time squared because of the math done after this.

1:32:39 Caller All right guys, bottom line, here's the deal.

1:32:41 Caller Looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person.

1:32:44 Caller One call is all you need to make.

1:32:46 Drew Call the dateline.

1:33:26 Adam Well, there you go. It's another fantabulous week of Loveline. Safely put to bed.

1:33:32 Drew I'll see you in the Minneapolis Airport tomorrow midday.

1:33:36 Adam God willing. I want to thank Tara, don't call me Tara, God damn it, for doing a great job on the phones all week. Lauren, I'm not sure what she does. I did see her in here. I think she's looking for a dog. I want to thank Damian for doing a nice job monkeying with the phone, and being just a general calming presence around here. I want to thank Anderson for doing a great job with those magic fingers, his. Hey, you're a prick. Potentiometers there, sliding them up and down. Of course, producer Ann for putting her feminine instinct all over the show.

1:34:13 Caller Who's has vastly overrated?

1:34:16 Caller Who's vastly overrated?

1:34:19 Drew Oh, well, let's get on with it.

1:34:23 Adam Here's the thing about those drops, Anderson, they have to be decipherable.

1:34:26 Drew That makes sense, yeah.

1:34:27 Caller Okay, thanks.

1:34:28 Adam So until next time, this is Adam Corolla for Dr. Drew saying Mahalo.

1:34:31 Drew Sad penis.

1:34:33 Caller This has been Loveline. The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station. The producer for Loveline is Ann Wilkins Dingle. Loveline is a presentation of Westwood One Entertainment.

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Thursday, September 20, 2001