Episode 1000670936428

0:57 Voiceover Loveline is meant for an adult audience.

1:02 Voiceover Loveline may contain sexually oriented content.

1:04 Voiceover Sexually oriented content.

1:08 Voiceover Listener discretion is advised.

1:14 Voiceover This is Loveline.

1:18 Drew With Adam Corolla and Dr. Drew. Hey, everybody, it's the best of the best of Loveline. Don't believe me, Linkin Park in here tonight. Tenacious D in here with Jack Black and Kyle. Also, Stone Temple Pilots, Scott Wynant, Wilmer Valderrama, Carmen Electra.

1:35 Huge.

1:36 Drew I may even listen to that.

1:37 Too much show.

1:38 Drew Let's get it started with Linkin Park. Hey, everybody, it's Loveline.

1:45 Sorry, guys.

1:46 Drew chester and Brad are both here from Linkin Park.

1:49 Good times.

1:50 Drew Little craft work in the background.

1:52 I'm tripping.

1:54 Drew Who is that? I always ask that. Fisher Spooner, man. Fisher Spooner. Of course. does it make a hell of a speaker? Or is it a dish? It's a high-end dishwasher. I got to figure that out. We can speak to Sarah, who we were speaking to before we went to break. She had a kid prematurely at 24 weeks, and she has another child now, right? yes. The first child was premature because of some infection. Now the question is what?

2:24 Well, I wanted to know if gonorrhea could have caused it, because when I had my daughter, I tested positive for gonorrhea.

2:30 Adam Oh my God. How are you getting all these STDs while you're pregnant?

2:34 Well, I don't know. See, I wanted to know also-

2:36 You're stinking hard. You wanted to know what?

2:41 Adam You wanted to know what?

2:42 Well, it's like I've been with the same person for four years, and I didn't get tested for STDs with my son for some reason. I don't know why.

2:51 Adam Well, even a- There are many different kinds of infections that can cause premature birth. You can get infections of the uterus itself. You can get infections in the vagina. You can get STDs. You can get infections in the tubes. All kinds of things can be predisposed to it. Even just urinary tract infections put you at risk of premature labor. So unless they told you what it was, it's very hard to speculate what it was. The fact that you had gonorrhea on the second birth, I find quite bizarre that nobody had picked that up before. I wonder if it was a false positive. Did they treat you before the child was delivered?

3:25 yes, they did.

3:26 Drew All right. So how's it going now? How old are the kids?

3:30 One is 14 months old.

3:31 That's my son.

3:32 Then my daughter is three months old.

3:34 Adam The guy that is the father of both is still around?

3:37 yes.

3:38 Adam Is he cheating on you?

3:39 Not that I know of. I don't know. I really hope not because I asked him and basically I got-

3:44 Did he get tested?

3:46 Yeah, we both got tested.

3:47 Adam Was he positive for gonorrhea?

3:48 yes.

3:49 Adam He was.

3:50 Drew Where do you think he- But that's not the kind of thing you harbor for many years, is it?

3:53 Adam Not for a guy, no.

3:55 Drew So where does he say he picked it up?

3:58 You know, he basically thinks it's me.

4:02 Adam He has convenient kind of turning the tables on you.

4:05 Drew You're sitting around pregnant for the last two and a half years.

4:09 Adam There is not a detail-oriented person.

4:11 Drew Is he on the road a lot?

4:13 No.

4:16 Drew What's he do? Is he work around metal?

4:18 Adam Or right now, what does he do?

4:21 He does maintenance for an abused child.

4:25 Oh my God.

4:26 Drew Really? So he's picking up some of the strays. Come on, he wouldn't do that. How old are the kids?

4:34 People are sick, man.

4:36 Adam How old are the kids?

4:37 Once 14 months and then the other.

4:38 Adam No, no, no.

4:39 The kids that he works with.

4:41 Drew Right.

4:41 Adam He works around.

4:43 No, they're, I think they're between like the ages of 13 and 15.

4:49 Drew That's my wheelhouse. Job doesn't pay much, but a lot of benefits, a lot of benefits.

4:55 Adam That worries me, I got to tell you. Yeah, it's funny, but it isn't.

5:02 Drew It's funny, funny for me, but it's funny, not funny for you.

5:05 Even if he's not a sicko, like we love to think he is. No, I think that he's definitely cheating on you.

5:11 Adam I mean, did he have any sexual abuse history in childhood?

5:15 Him?

5:15 Adam yes, him.

5:16 Not that I know of.

5:18 Adam You might just ask that question. If he has a history of anything like that, that would sort of, for me, be sufficient evidence to throw the book at him.

5:27 Drew I can see it now. Throwing the book at him.

5:29 Adam What about with bricks? You'd throw bricks through the window. I don't know.

5:32 Hit him in the head with it.

5:34 Drew Alright, well, Sarah, I'm glad you're so jovial about the whole situation. But, yeah, I wish I had your spirit, or, uh...

5:44 Adam Insulence.

5:45 Drew Or whatever it is, yes.

5:46 Medication.

5:47 Drew But, this gonorrhea thing is a little hard to ramp my mind around, because it's not like warts or something.

5:53 Adam No, it's a short-lived thing, and you know you got it when you got it.

5:56 Drew Are you guys married?

5:58 No, uh-uh.

5:59 Drew Uh-uh. Why not? Why not?

6:03 Why not?

6:03 Drew Yeah.

6:04 I don't know. We just, we have a hard time getting along with each other sometimes.

6:08 Drew Oh boy. Maybe slow down on the kids just a little bit.

6:11 Oh, I got fixed.

6:12 Drew You got fixed?

6:13 That doesn't mean you shouldn't wear protection, you know.

6:16 Oh, I know.

6:16 Drew All right.

6:17 Adam Condom still, right?

6:19 yes.

6:19 Drew All right.

6:20 Yeah. You seem that real serious.

6:22 Adam She finds humor in everything, doesn't she?

6:24 Drew God bless her. I can see this guy working at the, if you think about that, you're doing maintenance at one of those homes for other white kids.

6:33 Adam Who would be the one victimizing the kids or taking it?

6:35 Drew You know, it's got all them keys.

6:38 Adam Hey, let me tell you, that kind of stuff happens at psychiatric hospitals and stuff, too. People that aren't sort of trained to understand what they're coming in contact with, they come with very provocative, sexualized kids or abuse sexually. Think, well, this girl's into me.

6:51 Drew Well, Drew, if you and I know we're maybe spinning off a little bit here, but hypothetically, if you have a group of kids that were taken out of their home, runaways, that kind of stuff, I mean, you have to see it way up the scale. Super sexuality going on there. Oh, yes. It wouldn't be uncommon for a 14, 15-year-old girl to act out on anyone who was around.

7:15 Adam That's right. If you had somebody really to understand what that meant, and listen, I'm telling you that it's one of the things I wrote about in my new book called Cracked, which has now changed its name from other hell before August.

7:25 It's not out yet.

7:26 Adam It is one of the things I wrote about is that people don't understand those sorts of limits and what it means when people behave like that. In our culture, it's like, oh, it's cool. She's just into sex. It's a big deal. No.

7:36 Drew All right.

7:37 Adam She's 15.

7:38 Drew I got to get a gig out of one of those places.

7:40 Adam No kidding.

7:41 Drew Kelly?

7:42 Hi. How's it going?

7:43 Drew You're 20?

7:44 Caller That's right.

7:45 Drew What's up?

7:46 Caller Just really quick, I want to say all you guys are great. Adam and Drew, you guys rock. Linkin Park, you guys are great too. A meteor is awesome. Keep up the good work. Basically, my question is for chester. chester, I've heard of your efforts to bring awareness to and try to help stop the problem of child sexual abuse. And I was just wondering, because that's something that I want to try to get into too, that's a cause I want to get involved with. And I was wondering if you have any suggestions for any groups or programs to get involved with because it doesn't seem like there's really a lot of help out there that's available.

8:20 Caller Well, there's a lot of help out there. I mean, there's support groups and, you know, a lot of the thing is, is a lot of these issues are dealt with in a private setting and therapy and stuff like that, or just, or they're not dealt with at all pretty much. So it's not like people like to go to a group and talk about What about Rain? their kind of things like that.

8:39 Adam Rain?

8:40 Caller I've never heard of that as a matter of fact.

8:42 Drew Tori ames' group.

8:44 these are those gold dust moments.

8:46 Adam There she is. That's her.

8:48 Caller I mean, I honestly don't know. I just try to, I mean, my whole thing is that it's so rampant, especially in this country, that just talking about it is good enough. And just letting people know about it. I don't really know of any specific groups.

9:03 Adam I'll tell you what. There's something that Adam and I also feel very strongly about. And two areas that we feel need work. One is that the whole area of the science of the study of trauma survivorship is expanding rapidly. And you can get involved with that in a very interesting field that is sort of revolutionizing how we approach people with behavioral mental problems as a result of trauma.

9:24 Drew Well, you mean she can get into it by studying it?

9:26 Adam Well, if she's studying it, she can get into that field. So the other thing, though, is the bigger issue is why the government doesn't pay attention to this. How you can become sort of active and activist in somehow getting the attention of your representatives to create laws, to create boundaries, to create incentives or disincentives to the kind of behaviors that fuel the behavioral problems that come from this.

9:46 Caller It's because catching the criminals is more important than giving the victim support. It's more important to put the guy who touched the little girl in prison than it is to actually worry about what the effects of that little girl is going to have on the rest of her life. And that's the way it usually works with all types of victim crimes.

10:07 Drew Well, but the other side of that coin is that the victims, most likely if they're males, end up being the victimizers of the future. So it would behoove the government to stop it. Not only stop it, but to treat the kids.

10:23 Caller Treat the kids. Well, that's how I'm saying it. That's stopping it, in essence. I mean, it's like with everything else, if you don't hit your kids, your kids aren't going to grow up to learn how to hit people. So if you don't sexually molest your kids, then they're not going to grow up and be sex addicts, or get into porn, or become junkies, or do strange things, chronic masturbators or whatever. It doesn't matter.

10:44 Drew Whoa, whoa, whoa.

10:45 Adam I've told you a million times, Adam.

10:46 You won't take it from me, but from Linkin Park?

10:48 Drew No, he crossed a line this year. He looked at me when he said that.

10:53 Caller Well, what can you say?

10:55 Caller I do that because I try to find members of the club.

10:58 Drew Oh, okay. As long as we're on the same team. Well, here's the thing, too, that Drew and I are always interested in in an angry sort of way, which is we believe that the government, the government's job is to protect its citizens from crime and to keep the streets clean and the water purer and all that kind of stuff. And there's a finite amount of time and money that can be dedicated to each topic, whether it's crime or pollution. We think, shouldn't it be spent in the most efficient way possible? Which is, instead of waiting for people to commit these crimes, to build more prisons, to sign them parole officers and all this kind of stuff, shouldn't we find the people that are high risk, the people that, like I always say this, Drew's got three kids, we don't have to worry about him. They got Drew and his pain in the ass wife, they're never going to do anything wrong. Maybe an eating disorder, they may dabble in some homosexuality, but nothing that society has to worry about. If they do, Drew has plenty of money to pay for rehab. No doubt, you do have some set aside for that.

12:08 Adam For rehab, yeah, specifically.

12:09 Drew All right. Now, there are other people who don't have that luxury and people who are victimized and people that were huge.

12:16 Caller Which is pretty much almost everyone.

12:18 Drew It's growing higher because the more people that got victimized, the more people that victimize as they get older. And these are the people I would like the resources and the focus on earlier on so that we don't have to build the prisons and do the parole officers and all that later on.

12:35 Caller It's not only preventing crimes where there are other people involved, where there's victims involved. It's also preventing filling up the prisons with criminals who are doing victimless crimes like heroin addicts and crack addicts and cocaine addicts and people who are doing these kinds of things because of the things that happened to them in the past.

12:52 Adam I will tell you what.

12:52 Caller And then they're going to jail simply because they have their self-esteem and they want to go buy some heroin.

12:57 Adam As an addiction specialist, I've begun to think of myself as a traumatologist because every one of my inpatients, everyone is a trauma survivor. And so there you go.

13:07 Caller yes, that's it.

13:08 Drew Yeah, I always, whenever we do hear about these task forces that are trying to stop, you know, the John from getting the hook or the consensual crimes.

13:19 Caller Never gonna happen.

13:20 Drew I just, the amount of time, effort, and resources that are sunk into that, I mean, when Heidi Fleiss came on this show a few years back, wasn't her last appearance, but the time before that, the time I was threatened to be sued by the LA police department or something, but it was a big debacle. But the point is, the amount of time, officers, and effort they had into going after Heidi Fleiss would boggle your mind. I mean, of course, every officer is going to sign up for this detail. You want to pose as a japanese businessman and get a hand job, or do you want to go down to Watts?

13:54 Caller I'm going to Watts, man.

13:55 Drew Yeah.

13:56 Caller I'm going to go catch some speeders.

13:57 Drew I'm getting the handy from the runaway. Believe you me. But I don't blame the guys. But the point is, the amount of resources we had into like just going after her was amazing. And it would sicken you if you heard about them. And they're always saying we have a limited amount of resources. We have a limited amount of men. You then need to do what we want you to do. And that's go after violent crime and crimes of that nature. Thank you. Oh, yeah.

14:25 Caller Linkin Park.

14:27 Drew Linkin Park in the studio tonight. We'll take another call. Speak to Esteban. Hey. Esteban.

14:36 Yeah. I think Dr. Drew needs to be the next Surgeon General.

14:40 Drew Yeah.

14:41 Yeah.

14:41 And Adam needs to be the Vice president.

14:43 And well, Arnold needs to be president.

14:45 What about chester and me?

14:47 Yeah.

14:48 Adam Secretary of State and the Department of Defense.

14:51 We need honorary cabinet positions. There we go.

14:53 But you know, I had some un- imitated unprotected oral sacs and wanted to know what were some of the possible STD risk factors.

15:02 Adam You can get any STD that you could get from your genitals touching somebody else's genitals, you can get from your mouth touching somebody's genitals. Or somebody's mouth touching your genitals.

15:12 Drew The warts don't seem to go that way.

15:14 Adam Except the warts probably. Yeah. And the things like hepatitis C probably don't transmit that way. And although HIV has been documented for the receptive oral partner in male oral sex. does that make sense? No, not- The person giving the blowjob can get HIV.

15:31 Drew That's the receptive one?

15:33 Adam The stuff's going into that person.

15:35 Drew All right. But the other guy's receiving the BJ.

15:37 Adam You're right.

15:38 Caller Okay.

15:38 Adam It's a push.

15:39 Drew It's a jizz push.

15:40 Caller It's a push.

15:42 So the person receiving can get HIV?

15:44 Adam That's not been proven, but it's presumed to occur.

15:47 Drew Is this with a guy or a gal?

15:49 It was with a guy.

15:50 Drew All right.

15:51 Yeah.

15:51 Adam And L, the other usual sex transmitted diseases other than warts, can certainly occur.

15:55 Oral sex is sex.

15:57 Drew Yeah.

15:57 Adam Oral sex is sex.

15:59 Drew Which end of the boner were you on? The business end or the ball end?

16:04 I was both, actually.

16:06 Adam Oh, you went back and forth.

16:07 Yeah.

16:08 Drew Okay. So you got one and he got one. business and ball? Okay.

16:14 Yeah.

16:14 Drew If you're on the ball end of the boner, it's your boner, right?

16:17 Caller Yeah.

16:17 Yeah.

16:17 But then afterwards, he told me he had a retainer, so that kind of freaked me out.

16:20 Adam A retainer?

16:22 Caller Yeah.

16:22 Adam Why is that freaking you out?

16:24 Well, I just thought, you know, maybe it might, I get a cut or something.

16:27 Adam From the plastic?

16:28 Yeah.

16:29 Adam Did you get a cut?

16:30 I didn't notice anything.

16:31 Adam He kept his retainer in while he gave you a blow job?

16:35 Yeah.

16:36 Drew Horrible etiquette.

16:36 He's very dedicated to his orthodontist.

16:40 How old is he?

16:41 Drew Under no circumstances can you take this retainer out while you're awake, Phil.

16:44 Caller Did he have his head gear on?

16:46 He was probably around 24.

16:49 Drew Let me tell you something about the gays in braces. I have seen three or four guys with adult nails with braces. I mean, guys in their 40s, late 30s, that kind of thing, all gay. Because these are the only guys who would bother fixing their teeth that far. Straight guy would be like, F it, I'm married. I don't give a rat's ass what I look like. Snaggle, puss, I don't care. Gay guys are like, they're going to make a move on those teeth. You know what I mean? Yeah, they didn't get the braces when they were younger because they didn't know they're going to be gay. Now that they're gay, you got to retrofit. We had a gay landlord in my first apartment with that. As always, there's a 45-year-old guy with full set of braces. It's disconcerting. It's kind of weird, although I can see it being a little bit of a turn on for the fellas. I've just turned on that. This is the guy that when I bought the speakers from the guy in the parking lot out of the van and we were testing out, I think Spanish Fly by Van Halen. I had it cranked all the way up. He was pounding on our door and trying to tell us, we owed him, I bounced a rent check. Remember that story? Bongoing, slot car set. Rabbit. Rabbit running wild. Yeah, I was sure, it's the worst thing that can ever happen to you and your landlord, which is the guy owned my apartment, he was coming over for some reason in the middle of the day, in the middle of the week to tell me and my three roommates who lived in a one bedroom in North Hollywood that we'd bounced the rent check. And for some reason we were all home that day. I didn't go to work, my buddy, the Weas didn't go to work. We could have been it, we took a lot of days off. Inside of the apartment was, and this is when you open the front door, it was a one bedroom apartment, went right into the living room. We had two rabbits that we'd let run wild in the house, chase around, a small kitten that used to chase the rabbits around, which was, you never seen something so cute. When you were high. Full slot car set. We were 20, 21. Full slot car set in the living room, and a big bong that was like a monolith. It was a testament to our sloth, just right in the middle of this thing. And I just bought two speakers from a guy in a van, and we plugged them in, and my buddy said, I'm going to put this Van Halen CD in, and he just is crazy Van Halen guitar solo, and he kept turning it louder and louder, and he wanted to test the speakers. And I was like, my god, is this loud? But it was like noon, it was tuesday, I figured the old building was at work, and he cranked it, and we're just sitting there, Stone listening, and I heard a, I wasn't hearing sounds, because it was too loud, but I was hearing a vibration come from the front door, just sound like kunk, kunk, and I said, wheeze, turn that, let me, and they turned it down, it was kunk, and I opened the door. What was your friend's name? The Wheeze. We called him Don. Well his name is Don, but I called him, he was a sex wheeze, so we called him the Wheeze. Anyway, door swung open, and there was Jim with the braces, and he just looking at the rabbits, and the cat, and the bong, and the slide car. I'm wearing a towel, Wheeze got a bathrobe. My buddy Chris runs and hides, panic, and I just stood there, and he just kept shaking his head. He just, he was so, he was so speechless.

20:01 Adam I didn't know what to say.

20:02 Drew And I wrote him another check.

20:04 Adam That bounced too.

20:04 Drew That bounced too. Of course. There you go. All right.

20:07 Adam People don't disappoint, Adam.

20:08 Drew No, they don't. Well, he went straight to the bank from the place. I thought I could beat him to the bank. Linkin Park here. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back.

20:17 Thank you for calling Loveline.

20:19 Your call will be answered in the order it seems interesting.

20:24 1-800-LOVELINE-1.

20:40 Drew Hey, yo, it's Loveline. No, it's the best of the best of Loveline. And moving forward to our favorite guests. Although as I read what we're talking about, about how they met, what inspires them, and then says, Adam compliments Jack Black. It's taken the wrong way, things get uncomfortable. That really sounds like every show, doesn't it?

21:01 Adam Yeah.

21:02 Drew Adam does blank, things get uncomfortable.

21:04 Adam yes, or just Adam makes things uncomfortable.

21:05 Drew There you go. So you judge for yourself. Welcome Jack Black and Kyle Gass from Tenacious D. Hey everybody, it's Loveline.

21:17 I'm Adam.

21:17 Best Of That's Dr. Drew. Here comes the solo.

21:24 Drew It's Loveline, Tenacious D here, Jack Black. Kyle, I thought it was Kyle Gass.

21:29 Yeah, what did they say, Glass?

21:30 Drew Yeah.

21:31 That's the most popular misspelling.

21:33 Drew Yeah.

21:33 Because no one could possibly be named Gass.

21:36 Drew Yeah.

21:37 So let's just change it to what we'd like it to be.

21:39 Drew Well, we used to, back in the day, had really crappy JCPenney earth shoe knockoffs called Gass.

21:47 Caller No kidding.

21:47 Drew With two S's. Yeah. It was so bad that I had a pair that snapped in the middle, but the leather held them together.

21:54 Caller So it was like a bifolding earth shoe.

21:55 Adam You're walking in the middle of Adam regaling us with stories about his childhood.

21:58 Drew Wow.

21:59 Adam No washer, no dryer.

22:00 Caller What does that mean?

22:02 Adam I'll tell you.

22:02 Caller You guys go.

22:03 Best Of I don't mind. You can cry to me.

22:05 Drew I got a lot of questions for you guys, actually.

22:08 Best Of We'll go.

22:08 Drew We're going to do a, I think.

22:11 Best Of First of all, before you ask any questions, I want to apologize for being so horribly late. I think we were supposed to be here a long time ago. And it was because of the Laker game. But I will say, are we the latest ever of any of your guests ever?

22:25 Adam No.

22:26 Best Of No.

22:26 Adam No.

22:26 Best Of Okay, good.

22:27 Drew Of course not.

22:28 Best Of Good.

22:28 Adam Andy called ahead.

22:29 Drew Yeah.

22:30 Best Of Andy Dick called for us?

22:31 Drew Yeah. No, he said, and you called ahead.

22:33 Best Of Oh yeah, that's true.

22:34 Adam Andy called ahead.

22:35 Drew No, we're, listen, we're honored that you would even come into our humble studios.

22:39 We really are.

22:41 Best Of You guys are legends.

22:42 Yeah, legendary.

22:42 Really.

22:43 Drew Well, so here's where we have to plug and then I'll start with the questions, which is the DVD of Tenacious D, which is the complete masterworks. It's the greatest DVD ever sold, Drew. Are you aware of this? There's been many given away that were much better, but the only one that actually.

23:01 Caller Double D could not be less interested, it seems.

23:04 Drew Drew, where are you going?

23:05 Best Of Double D. Has anyone ever called you Double D, Dr. Drew?

23:08 Adam No, I like that though.

23:09 Best Of Me too.

23:09 Adam Let's call him that. Creative partner.

23:11 Best Of Rage comes up with a lot of golden nuggets. They just come off his head. It's my job.

23:14 Adam The highly provocative DVD contains legendary epic recital at London's Brixton Academy that was by chance recorded on November 3rd, 2002.

23:21 Caller Wow. Yeah.

23:22 Drew Wow.

23:23 Best Of That was the only concert we ever filmed.

23:25 Adam Jack and Cale slay the mighty dragon and treat the British public to a phenomenal performance.

23:29 Drew Now you can get the DVD on Amazon or get it anywhere.

23:32 Caller Go ahead and put some stank on it there.

23:34 Best Of He did put some stank on it.

23:35 Adam With the classic, the now classic, F Her Gently.

23:38 Drew Oh, yeah. Sure. Sure. If you ever heard the Muzak version of that, it'll bring tears to you. You realize that it is a strong melody when you hear the Muzak version. So now where did you guys, well now we met Jack at a dinner with-

23:55 Adam Years ago.

23:56 Drew Years ago. Do you remember that?

23:57 Best Of No. What went down?

23:59 Adam It was a Loveline sort of about to be- It was like-

24:03 Drew Launched.

24:04 Adam Launched for a third season or something.

24:06 Best Of Yeah, because my girlfriend was on the TV show for a little while.

24:10 Caller Right.

24:11 Adam For a long while.

24:11 Caller Yeah.

24:12 Caller Was she ill-fated?

24:12 Best Of For a little long while.

24:14 Drew Yeah. Well, it's all- everything's ill-fated if you think about it.

24:19 Caller We're all going to die. Life is ill-fated.

24:20 Drew Yeah. Even ships that don't sink are ill-fated.

24:22 Caller But beyond the existential question, it did quite well. It did well.

24:27 Drew Well, Loveline did well in about four or five seasons.

24:29 Caller Is that true? Have you guys found that?

24:31 Caller Yeah.

24:34 Drew Ill-fated.

24:34 Best Of What are you doing, Cage? Whenever we do any interviews, Kyle immediately goes on the attack.

24:39 Caller I'm not attacking.

24:40 Best Of You're ill-fated.

24:41 Caller I love the show.

24:42 Drew Ill-fated. How dare you barge into our studio 45 minutes late? It's a compensation. Now, how did Tenacious D get started and where did you meet? I'm sorry if you've been asked these questions before, but I don't know the answer to them.

24:57 Best Of We met 13 years ago. We were both in this theater company, the Actors Gang here in LA.

25:05 Caller I was kind of like a musical dude, played guitar and Jack came in singing all the time.

25:11 Drew Yeah.

25:12 Caller He was a young kid on the make.

25:13 Best Of I came in and I wanted to be the musical force of the theater company. So we locked horns at first. We weren't really friends. We were arch enemies. But then, isn't it weird how sometimes your worst enemy turns into your best friend? Right.

25:26 Drew Now, that's what happened with Drew and I. We hate each other first.

25:29 Adam Eventually, we're going to be good friends.

25:30 Caller We're sort of like, where to look for him?

25:32 Adam Eventually.

25:34 Drew Where was the or is the actors gang? I never heard of them.

25:37 Best Of Well, now the theater is located now on Santa Monica and Vine. Basically, one block east of Vine.

25:43 Caller It came out of UCLA back in the early 80s. Tim Robbins was leading the way there.

25:49 Drew And did you, anyone go to UCLA?

25:52 Caller I, yeah, we both did.

25:53 Drew Oh, you did? Are you guys from out here, or you just came out here to go to college?

25:56 Best Of I'm from here. Kyle is just a little ways up north.

25:59 Caller Just north, yeah.

25:59 Best Of Walnut Creek.

26:00 Drew Where are you from, Jack?

26:01 Best Of Hermosa Beach.

26:02 Adam Oh, my goodness.

26:03 Drew Oh, nice.

26:03 Best Of Yeah, and then Culver City, Santa Monica.

26:06 Drew Sure.

26:07 Best Of Hollywood, all around, every nook and cranny of this neighborhood.

26:10 Drew Wow, and all right. Well, now I have all my questions answered.

26:15 Best Of Did we answer them all? Look at his split.

26:16 Yep.

26:16 Best Of Wow.

26:17 Drew Heather.

26:18 Yeah, hi.

26:19 Drew You're 24?

26:20 Caller Yep.

26:21 Drew What's up?

26:22 Caller First of all, I just like to say Jack and Kyle, I love you guys.

26:25 Best Of Thanks.

26:26 Caller You guys are awesome.

26:27 Best Of All right.

26:28 That's nice. Jack, you look super, super hot in the new spin.

26:32 Best Of Thank you. In the new what?

26:34 The new spin.

26:35 Best Of Oh, really? Is there a hot photo of me?

26:37 Oh, yeah.

26:38 Caller Totally hot.

26:39 Best Of Bonable?

26:40 Caller Very vulnerable.

26:42 Best Of Sweet.

26:43 Major vulnerable.

26:44 Caller All right.

26:45 Best Of I shouldn't put words in people's confluence. No, I should have let her say whatever.

26:49 No, it's all about bonable works for me, man.

26:53 Drew All right.

26:53 Adam She's 14 after all. It's all about bonability in today's entertainment market.

27:00 Drew What's up, Heather?

27:02 Caller Okay.

27:02 So here's my question.

27:05 Caller My fiance has a tendency to download porn on my computer.

27:10 Adam Break it off.

27:12 Caller Break it off immediately.

27:14 Hang on. But see, the thing is he lies to me about it. And that's my biggest pet peeve.

27:20 Caller And so the thing wouldn't be a big deal except that it makes...

27:23 I have really low self-esteem.

27:24 Caller So it makes me feel like, you know, what's he doing looking at that instead of at me? And then for him to lie about it makes me think he's doing something worse.

27:31 Adam He's lying about it because you have all this energy about it. He knows you're going to be spinning out of control.

27:36 Drew And have you ever thought of it from the porn side, which is what's he doing looking at her instead of at me? I mean, yeah, the porn is feeling, you know what I'm saying? The porn is silent.

27:46 Adam He's looking at Heather?

27:47 Drew yes. It's a silent minority that I feel like I have to speak for.

27:53 Best Of I have some advice.

27:54 Okay.

27:55 Best Of You should just like watch some porn yourself. And then when he comes into the room, turn it off really quick like you're embarrassed about it. And then you'll cancel each other out.

28:05 What about if I'm downloading pictures of you, Jack?

28:08 Best Of Yeah. I don't know. Then he might come after me with a machete.

28:13 Drew Okay. Well, look, can you get over the fact that guys look at porn and not be threatened by it?

28:18 Caller That's not the problem.

28:20 Caller It's the whole like when he tries to cover it up.

28:24 Adam And then I'm like, Heather, it's because of all your energy that he does it. He's trying to avoid you triggering something in you. He knows if you catch him, you're going to spin.

28:35 Drew Yeah, I know.

28:36 Caller Once she opened up about it, I think they would totally find a common ground.

28:41 Drew Here's the thing, guys reflexively cover up porn, no matter if Ron Jeremy came storming up the stairs, you would yank the cord on the computer. Be like, you can't get busted watching porn. It doesn't matter.

28:54 Adam It's the mom reflex.

28:55 Drew Yeah, you got your mom.

28:57 Caller Boys don't want to get in trouble.

28:58 Drew Right, right. And when, but here's what women do, and they're so full of crap with this when they do that.

29:04 Caller I don't mind.

29:04 Drew It's not that you watch the porn. It's that you lie about it.

29:07 Caller You hide it.

29:07 Drew You hide it. That's the part. No, they hide it because obviously Heather would spin out if he did it. Although, I wonder if chick cops do that. It's not that you were speeding. That's not why I'm giving you a ticket. It's that when I asked you if you knew how fast you're going, you lied and said 55. You think women, you think female cops?

29:28 Adam I am certain of that.

29:29 Drew That's a good analogy. Alright, so leave the guy alone. And by the way, if you put the screws to a guy when you're living with him, they start beating off more and they're even more absent. They'll withdraw inside the relationship. Alright.

29:48 Best Of We're the last in line. My favorite lyric from that, when it goes, You can release yourself, but the only way to go is down.

30:03 Drew But he actually has a guitar, right?

30:05 Best Of No, he doesn't play guitar.

30:06 Drew does he?

30:06 Best Of does he? No, his guitarist does that. Yeah, he does.

30:09 Drew I miss Ronnie james' hair. He used to have that huge, there's nothing like a pitch black long rock fro.

30:17 Best Of Yeah.

30:18 Drew He had a perm, a tight perm that was jet black and long too. But would you say that Dio is who you mold yourself after? If there could be one lead rock singer, at least from a voice standpoint, would it be Dio?

30:37 Best Of If I had to pick one, here's a weird thing. I'm going to have to go Bobby McFerrin. It's on the other end of the spectrum. Sure. I'm talking about pre, don't worry, be happy, back in the day when he was kicking at old school.

30:52 Drew Wow. Yeah.

30:54 Best Of He could make his voice sound like all kinds of different musical instruments.

30:58 Drew I was like the guy from Police Academy.

31:00 Best Of yes.

31:00 Drew Except more with instruments.

31:02 Best Of Okay. Yeah. But I first saw him on the Grammys and he was doing something and he's a master of the falsetto. Oh, really? You know, that yodeling crack that you're going to go, ah. Yeah. Yeah. My voice is a little thrashed right now. Little Christy. And he would slap his chest. Yeah.

31:23 Drew And he gets that great sound. Yeah. I think he could do that water dripping noise too if he did it.

31:28 Best Of Yeah.

31:30 Drew Yeah. I don't know how people do that. No, that's the chug sound. This is the drip. I can't do anything.

31:36 Best Of Jack did it. Did you do the drip? Isn't it like a?

31:41 Drew Yeah, there it is. yes, that's it.

31:44 Yeah.

31:45 Drew You're 17?

31:46 Caller Yeah.

31:47 Drew What's up?

31:48 Caller Well, first off, I'd like to give a shout out to Jack Black, my friend Mitch's hero. And furthermore, would you guys like to hear the question?

31:55 Drew Sure.

31:56 Caller All right. I have a penis that curves to the left.

32:04 Drew And is it just a soft curve?

32:07 Caller Yeah.

32:07 Drew Is it sort of flair to the left? Or is it making a sudden movement? It starts to make its move.

32:14 Caller You've had it your whole life?

32:15 Drew About the one inch mark?

32:17 Caller Never noticed it for a couple years ago.

32:19 Adam So it's something that's developed.

32:20 Best Of Are you left handed?

32:22 Caller No. I'm ambidextrous.

32:24 Drew Nice. That means you beat off with your heels, right? Is that what that means? Because I've heard people talk about it. I always assume that's what it meant.

32:32 Best Of You lube up the heels?

32:34 You lube up the heels.

32:35 Drew It's like that and it's great if you're two-fisted porn guy like me. Because there's nothing worse than opening the magazine and having one side sort of flapping in the wind and starting to bend. If you keep it taut with the two hands, sort of remember the bowl worker? This is the opposite. You're trying to actually pull the porn apart and then you're really working it with the heels.

32:58 Best Of It's like a yoga move.

33:00 Drew Yeah, yeah. And it keeps...

33:02 Best Of The flapping butterfly.

33:03 Drew sometimes your heels can get kind of chalky and chafy and it keeps them real supple. That's how you always know when a guy's a heel-jacker. You just look at his heels. If they're sort of baby soft.

33:14 Best Of Yeah, when you're on the beach, check it out.

33:17 Caller I noticed Double D is looking at a lot of pictures.

33:19 Adam these are curved peinages.

33:20 Caller Drew, did you find?

33:21 Adam Yeah. This is a book about surgical procedures to correct.

33:25 Best Of Wow.

33:26 Drew Yeah, it's a bad time. Hey, Jen. Yeah. Drew says when he's paying attention that you can take vitamin E.

33:35 Adam 800 units a day and that might help it. But do we know what it's from? Well, it's usually from trauma. If something you're not born with, if it's something you've acquired later on, it's usually from something scarring.

33:48 Caller It's where I'm not moving.

33:49 Caller I'm usually gentle with myself.

33:51 Best Of Do you wear Tidy White is?

33:53 Caller No, no, I'm a free baller.

33:55 Adam It's usually, I was just reading this little piece here, it says usually from Coital Trauma during the act.

34:00 Drew During the sex. Oh, because I always saw Coital meant beating off of your heels.

34:05 Adam No, no, no.

34:06 Best Of But while you're waiting for it, everything means beating off of your heels.

34:08 Drew What would a trauma be? Well, you know that thing when it pops out and you hit a little taint or you hit a pelvic, you know, you know, it gets mad, right? Like once every three years, I try to go for a speed run. And it's always it's always a disaster. It's like you get going, you know, when you go down a hill on a skateboard and you get going too fast, you start wobbles, you get to wobble. And the only way to stop is the shoulder cartwheel on the roll trash cans. That's what the sex you get going too fast. You get to speed wobbles. And that's where the coitus injurious happens.

34:44 Adam This is saying that disease has reached maturity with a period of at least 18 months from the initial onset of symptoms and curvature has been stable for at least six months. So, I mean, in spite of vitamin E, in spite of, you know, waiting things out, a year and a half later, you still got the curve and it's still interfering with your functioning or causing painful erection. That's when they want to do the surgery.

35:02 Drew What about this theory I've had for a while, Drew, which is, you know how a plant will grow toward the sun?

35:08 Adam Yeah, so you should want to shine a light on the other side.

35:10 Drew No, no, no. My penis moves toward my porn collection. I'm convinced.

35:15 Adam So you got to spread your porn all over the house.

35:16 Drew Oh, I do.

35:17 Adam Yeah, well, of course.

35:18 Best Of does it hurt when you get a boner?

35:20 Drew Oh, wait a minute. Let me get him.

35:21 Best Of Oh, he's gone?

35:22 Caller No, I just put him on hold.

35:23 Drew Chet?

35:23 Caller Yeah.

35:24 Drew Pain with boner?

35:25 Caller Not at all, no. All right.

35:27 Best Of Have you experimented with some different positions where it's all right?

35:30 Caller I actually had a question about positions. If I position myself so the curve is going up, will I hit a girl's G spot?

35:36 Adam Yeah, interesting question. A lot of women, though, complain about the curves up and down. It could be a blessing? It could be a blessing. yes, it could be from God directly.

35:50 Caller You're looking for a white lining there?

35:53 Drew Yeah. It's like people saying, when I lost my eyesight, it saved my life because that's when I put the bottle down. It still doesn't fall under the blessing category. I see. Curved penis. But you're all right, Jen.

36:07 Adam Yeah, it's a good time.

36:07 Drew It's a good time.

36:08 Adam You're 17. 800 units of vitamin E a day. Just get with that for the time being.

36:11 Drew All right. And you got to push it into the hole. You understand? You don't take it orally. Sounds good, Adam. All right, buddy.

36:17 Caller All right.

36:18 Drew Try to help.

36:19 Caller Take care.

36:20 Drew And we'll be right back with Jack and Kyle from Tenacious D.

36:25 Hello, is this your radio?

36:27 Radio Loveline will be right back.

36:44 Caller Hey, yo, it's Loveline.

36:46 Drew Not only Loveline, but the best of the best of Loveline. I'm Adam, that's Dr. Drew, Dr. Ubert's certified physician, Dick's man specialist. Don't believe me, it's the best of the best of Loveline. Who's on tonight?

36:58 Adam Oh, Tenacious D, Linkin Park. Linkin, but we didn't mention the opening show. Linkin Park, nicest guys in music.

37:03 Drew Great guys. Stone Temple Pilots on tonight, Wilmer Valderrama, Carmen Electra. But let's get started.

37:10 Caller No, no, we're getting back.

37:12 Drew Oh, we're getting back? Oh, that's right.

37:14 Caller yes.

37:14 Drew I was in the top of the show. So that's how much show we have. More Tenacious D, Germany or Florida.

37:21 Caller Explain to these guys.

37:22 Drew I'll explain how this works. It was actually conceived at the Kimmel show. I gave him six months to do something with it. He never used it. So we took it over for this show. We decided that all all evil emanates from either Germany or Florida. Bizarre evil. There's murders everywhere and there's death and mayhem everywhere. But the sort of teaching the schnauzer to heil Hitler or eating the carcass of your newborn.

37:50 Adam Last week we had a guy slicing his penis into sausage.

37:53 Drew Yeah, it's Germany.

37:54 Adam And they're frying it up and eating it with a friend.

37:57 Best Of Was that a Florida dude?

37:58 Adam No, it was Germany.

37:59 Drew Germany or Florida is where this stuff comes from. So we now have to guess whether it's Germany or Florida.

38:06 Best Of Was it delicious?

38:08 Adam He didn't say. We didn't actually talk to the guy.

38:10 Best Of Oh, okay.

38:11 Drew Rick?

38:13 Caller Rick?

38:15 Drew Caller who goes by the name of Rick? All right, after that big Germany or Florida build up. Let's take a question for Jack. The guy's been on hold for 87 minutes. Big fan. Chris?

38:26 Caller Hey.

38:26 Drew What's up?

38:27 Caller First, Adam, you're a genius.

38:30 Drew Thanks.

38:31 Caller If you were in charge, the world would be a better place. Double D, you're a passionate, passionate man.

38:38 Adam Double D.

38:39 Drew Drew is a man of great passion.

38:41 Adam Drew, you started, Jack?

38:42 Best Of I didn't do it. It was Cage.

38:44 Adam Okay. I'm sorry.

38:44 Drew Go ahead. You have a question for Jack?

38:47 Caller Yeah. Tenacious D, the greatest man in the world. True. Okay. Now, Ronnie james, has he heard your song yet?

38:55 Best Of Who?

38:56 Caller Ronnie james has heard my song.

38:57 Best Of Ronnie james, yeah. We were in his music video. He liked the song.

39:03 Caller He did? Okay. I got another question. Out of all the movies you've been in, Jack, what would you say was your favorite?

39:12 Best Of My best one is still probably High Fidelity. But I like School of Rock an awful lot.

39:19 Caller Yeah.

39:20 Drew Well, I would say that High Fidelity may have been a marginally better movie, but you were really showcased in School of Rock.

39:28 Best Of That's true.

39:28 Drew I mean, without sounding like an ass-licker here, without you School of Rock is not a very good movie.

39:35 Best Of It crumbles. It crumbles.

39:37 Drew It's a cute idea, but you definitely need you and your background, and your specific talents to pull it along.

39:49 Best Of yes, it was written for me. It was designed that way.

39:51 Drew It wasn't a bad vehicle. It was like a Camry with air conditioning, but the lower interior.

39:56 Adam Love that film.

39:58 Drew But hold on. Jack got into that car. Anyone know what happened?

40:01 Adam What happened?

40:02 Drew Dropped a big block blown Chevy in there, pulled out the back seat, put Naga hide in there, and put a nice limo tint on the windows.

40:10 Best Of What's Naga hide?

40:11 Drew That's a fake leather.

40:12 Best Of I thought that was like nitrous.

40:14 Drew No. We have hooked up the Naga. That's nitrous oxide. Put the Naga's tanks on there too.

40:20 Best Of I also put that thing, the blower, like Mad Max. Oh yeah.

40:23 Drew Yeah. That's blown. That's supercharged.

40:26 Best Of Thank you.

40:26 Drew That's supercharged. Hemi, and he put the four-bolt main in there, and he had the nine-inch Muncie rear end and the four-speed rock crusher tranny. Yeah. And the race white letter on the torque twister tires.

40:39 Caller But if Jack's not in there, if Jack's not in there, it's a pacer.

40:43 Drew It's the beige Camry with the bad, and no carpet, just the actual vinyl floor mats.

40:50 Caller Yeah.

40:51 Drew Yeah.

40:51 Caller All right.

40:52 Drew AM radio.

40:53 Adam All right.

40:54 Drew Hey, no air either, by the way.

40:57 Caller Who are we talking to?

40:59 Drew Chris. You have any more automotive questions?

41:01 Adam No, no. Chris got his answer.

41:02 Drew Oh, he did?

41:03 Caller Yeah, I got mine.

41:05 Drew All right. We got another Germany or Florida. So we have to prioritize on this show.

41:08 Paul?

41:10 Drew Yeah. You're 14?

41:12 Caller Yeah.

41:13 Drew All right. You have a Germany or Florida for us?

41:15 Caller Yeah. Okay. Man tries to rob a bank, gun goes off in his pants. He gets hurt, he grabs the cash and runs for the door. As he ran out the door, he got hit by a van and they never caught the guy.

41:33 Oh.

41:37 Adam Is this something that happened a long time ago or recently? Do we know?

41:39 Caller About a year ago.

41:40 Drew About a year ago.

41:41 Best Of Well, but they got the DNA.

41:43 Drew Gun going off in the pants.

41:44 Actually, no, there was no blood at the scene.

41:47 Adam That feels Florida.

41:48 Drew Van feels Florida unless you picture one of those funky European vans, which are probably more prevalent.

41:54 Adam I don't see a Florida bank being so close to the street that you open the door and get hit by a van. That's Germany, right?

42:01 Drew What the hell do I know where the banks are located in Germany?

42:04 Adam I've never been to Germany. More room in Florida.

42:07 Drew More room. So what are we going with?

42:09 Adam Germany? Whatever you say.

42:10 Drew I'm going to go Germany. We're going to Germany, Paul.

42:15 Adam Florida.

42:16 Drew Oh, Drew, with your stupid bank road proximity theory.

42:21 Caller That's retarded.

42:22 Drew I swear.

42:23 Best Of I was going to go Florida, too.

42:26 Caller It had me picturing little European cobblestone streets.

42:30 Caller Yeah.

42:30 Caller Narrow buildings.

42:31 Drew Yeah. See if it was custom van, that's Florida.

42:34 Caller Of course.

42:36 Drew By the way, let me tell you something what Jack Black did with School of Rock. It was just a plain tradesman van. No captain's chairs, no paneling, no blou-punk, nothing.

42:49 Caller Was there a table in the back? Was there carpet?

42:53 Drew No, just the interior.

42:54 Best Of Oh, the shell?

42:56 Drew Just a shell. It's a kind of a painter would use.

42:58 Caller No, no, no.

42:59 Drew It did have a ladder rack, but we took that off. Jack got hold of that van. Jack put Love Tron and rainbow tape on the side of it. You know what I'm saying?

43:08 Caller And one of those bubble windows that is really not good for anything because light cannot pass through it in either direction.

43:14 Drew I don't know. Someone decided it would be really cool to have a bubble window about the size of a football helmet. Yeah. A saucer on the upper right hand corner of the van that nobody could see out of and nothing really passed through. It was just black. I'm convinced now that it was just a black salad bowl that was glued to the side of the van.

43:34 Best Of Did you see the movie?

43:36 Drew The van? No. Your movie?

43:38 Best Of Yeah.

43:39 Drew Yeah.

43:39 Adam He had the van.

43:40 Drew Oh, he did have the custom van.

43:41 Best Of Where did you see it? Yeah.

43:43 Drew Where did I see the van?

43:44 Best Of Where did you see the movie? Did you see like a matinee last week or something?

43:47 Drew No. I saw-

43:48 Best Of Maybe you're judging it harshly because the audience was not into it, but I think it's better than you're giving it credit. It wasn't a hollowed out shell of a van.

43:56 Drew No, it was-

43:57 Best Of I swear to God, when I read it, I thought it was a Ferrari.

44:00 Drew No, it-

44:01 Best Of I read it and I was like, this thing is just plain funny.

44:04 Drew No, it was a LeBaron.

44:05 Best Of What don't I understand?

44:06 Caller He's saying without you, it's a hollowed out van. With you, it's a custom van.

44:10 Adam He's saying he read it without him and he thought it was-

44:12 Best Of That's right. I read it.

44:13 Drew Yeah, but it was him reading it.

44:16 Adam He saw yourself in it. He saw what you could do with it.

44:18 Drew The custom van cannot read it.

44:19 Best Of It was written by a good friend of mine, Mike White.

44:21 Adam Now, he went to my little Lord Fonthleroy School. Mike White did.

44:26 Best Of Oh, really?

44:26 Adam Yeah. He fashioned it after the class just ahead of my kids. My kids who love this film are all pissed off because all the names are people they know the class. Whoa. Isn't that weird?

44:36 Best Of Mr. Schneebly? Yeah.

44:38 Adam All the names of the kids.

44:39 Best Of Oh, right. Okay.

44:42 Drew All right. I'm going to be more. I was just sucking up to you, Jack. Oh, okay. The movie was a solid movie. It was a good, it was a prelude, a Honda prelude. It was a maroon prelude, low mileage.

44:58 Best Of When's your movie come out so I can talk about what kind of crappy car it reminds me of?

45:03 Drew It's a Fiero, the four cylinder, not the six cylinder. All right. No, no, it was a good, good solid movie, but you made it. The part was made for you. Thank you. Yeah. Hi, Fidelity. Great movie. We'll take a quick break and we'll be right back.

45:18 All right, guys.

45:18 Caller Here's the deal.

45:19 You're looking to hook up, sick of wasting time with the wrong person.

45:23 Adam One call is all you need to make.

45:24 Call the Dateline. 877-889-DATE.

45:28 Caller Call the Dateline.

45:49 Drew Yeah, more of the best of the best of the best of Loveline. And we keep on keeping on with a very revealing conversation with Scott Weiland from Stone Temple Pilots. Yep, it is Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla.

46:04 Caller That is Dr. Drew. Now she's a lot better.

46:06 Adam She's just talking about it.

46:08 Drew Scott Weiland is here. Robert DeLeo.

46:11 Adam She hates you and hates her pregnancy. You did this to her.

46:14 Drew Stone Temple Pilots are the name of the band. Dr. Drew just says sorry to the door and Robert, but that's all right. Katie? yes. What's up?

46:23 Caller Hello. First of all, I'd like to say I love the show and Adam, you kind of come across, you know, sometimes it's being crass or whatever.

46:31 No.

46:32 Caller I know that's hard to believe, but you're not fooling me. I know that I think you're just really sensitive and you give great advice to people. Thank you.

46:40 Adam You really pulled the wool over this young lady's arm.

46:44 Caller But anyways, my question is, I was curious if it's possible for a condom to leak, even if it doesn't break through the bottom?

46:53 Adam Absolutely. Through the base? Yeah, that is one of the areas of concern, if it slips or if it leaks out.

46:59 Drew You mean seepage around the base?

47:02 Adam That's why you got to roll it all the way down.

47:04 Drew That's a bad sign.

47:05 Adam They can leak out the tip without having an actual break too. That's another way they fail.

47:10 Caller Or if you have a member the size of Robert's, then they just tend to bust on you.

47:15 Caller Yeah, no, it didn't break, but I had sex with my boyfriend today and it just kind of felt after he had an orgasm, like it leaked at the bottom.

47:23 Adam Yeah, it can.

47:24 Caller And I wasn't sure if I should be concerned about it, because I believe it's kind of around when I'm ovulating also.

47:30 Adam You ought to take that morning after pill if you have any concern at all.

47:33 Caller Really.

47:34 Drew But how often would one leak? I mean, without breaking.

47:39 Adam I don't know.

47:39 Drew You know what I mean?

47:40 Adam Yeah.

47:41 Drew It doesn't sound that likely.

47:42 Adam You know what? It's not that likely, but she has a concern about it.

47:45 Caller What the hell? I'm sure you don't want to be the person.

47:47 Adam Take that morning after pill. Why not?

47:49 Caller You know, when I was in the LA County jail, in that drug program, every month you had an AIDS class, you know, and they gave us this sheet of paper at the end of the class, and it had all the main condom brands, and then it broke them down into their percentage of effectiveness, and it's pretty amazing that some of the main brands are only like around 55, 60 to 70% effective. Even like Trojan, the ones that were up in the 90 were, I can't remember the name of the one.

48:31 Adam It used to be Ramsey, is that not it?

48:32 Caller Yeah, I think it was.

48:33 Adam Durex, Durex.

48:34 Caller I think those ones were a couple of the ones, but there was a lot of the ones that people use all the time, the percentage wasn't really all that effective.

48:42 Drew Wouldn't that be the thrust of your advertising campaign if you were amongst the higher ones up there? I mean, they're always doing these things where, four to five dinners surveyed. Yeah. I mean, if you, if I got a condom company and I'm the, in the 90% effectiveness percentile and that my competitors are down in the 60s, that's the first thing I'm bringing up. I mean, that is the paramount issue. I never see them, they never seem to bring that up. They never slam the other ones. You know how like Pepsi always slams Coke or Coke will slam Pepsi, you know, when they're doing advertising, you never hear Ramsey slamming Trojan or Trojan slamming Sheik or...

49:24 Caller Because I think it's not the effectiveness that sells condoms, it's the sensitivity.

49:29 Drew I guess that's true.

49:30 Adam You know what I think is the problem? I think each of these companies make so many different brands, they probably also have some of the lesser effective ones.

49:39 Caller We're on to you by westwood One and Trojan, America's number one condom, trusted for over 80 years.

49:45 Drew That's right, but not the same condom. You got to get a new one every 65 years, right?

49:49 Is that Trojan?

49:51 Drew Emile? Emile? Emile. Okay, but just listen. Listen, Emile. If someone calls you Emile, answer, right?

50:02 Yeah.

50:02 Best Of All right.

50:04 Drew What's up?

50:06 I got a problem with violence, especially towards my girlfriend.

50:09 Drew jesus. Darryl, a mental note. Don't make fun of a guy's names that have problems with violence and his voices sound like Paul Bunyan and james Earl jones.

50:19 Sorry.

50:19 Drew That's all right. Now, don't ever apologize. That's fine. Everything you do is golden around here. What are you doing?

50:26 Caller Well, I mean, I lose my temper a lot. I mean, I don't mean to. I mean, I do.

50:32 I feel bad about it.

50:34 Drew And what do you do? What's the worst you've done?

50:38 Caller I broke someone's neck once.

50:41 Drew Well, that's not so bad. Yeah, I'm sure they had it coming. Was this a girlfriend or just some guy?

50:48 Caller This is someone I was locked up with.

50:50 Drew OK, but watch the door. And what were you locked up for?

50:57 Caller Salt.

50:57 Drew I see. All right. So you have a history of violence then, right?

51:02 Caller yes.

51:02 Drew OK. And you'd like to stop that?

51:05 Caller Yeah.

51:06 Drew And someone was violent with you when you were growing up?

51:09 Adam Sure.

51:10 Caller Yeah, a little bit. We all had a little violence, you know.

51:13 Adam No, not everyone does. And it's what causes kids to... It's like taking a puppy and beating the crap out of it. Are you surprised that dog wants to bite everybody comes around? No, of course not. Somehow we miss that in humans.

51:25 Caller Right.

51:26 Adam All right.

51:26 Drew So you've been you've been incarcerated. You're out now, but you still have some of the same tendencies.

51:32 Adam Have you been on medication?

51:35 Caller No.

51:35 Adam Has anybody ever suggested that to you?

51:37 Caller They suggested it from my from my parole. But my whole thing is about my girlfriend.

51:43 I mean, I just one of these days I'm going to hurt her and I really don't do it.

51:47 And I really love her.

51:48 Caller Well, the whole thing is not about your girlfriend. The whole thing is really about you. And you know what? I just I can say this. You know, I I have a problem with drugs and alcohol. And you know, I've also been incarcerated too. But you know what? If the problem is not with like your girlfriend or your brother or your best friend, the problem really is kind of like if you don't want to if you want to stop acting that way and you feel really bad about it is affecting the relationships in your life. You really need to do kind of what Drew said and go talk to a professional man because it's it's something a lot of people suffer from. And there are people that can help you with that problem and it will improve the quality of your life. And part of it might be that you might need to take some kind of medication to take the edge off your temper.

52:35 Adam Take the edge off or to help contain in those situations where it seems to get out of control. It's a biological process and there are things that can just sort of keep a lid on it for you.

52:45 Caller Isn't Tegretol a drug that people use for that a lot of times?

52:48 Adam Anti-apoleptic medication could be something.

52:50 Caller How's your relationship with your mom?

52:53 My mom is dead.

52:54 Caller When did she die? How old were you?

52:56 She died about eight years ago.

52:58 Adam Was she an addict?

53:00 Caller Excuse me?

53:01 Adam Was she an addict or alcoholic?

53:03 Caller Alcoholic. She died. She fell on the steps and broke her neck in four places.

53:07 Caller Do you look at your girlfriend like it might be a memory of your mom? Did you have a bad relationship with your mom?

53:16 Drew He may have struck a nerve there. Hey, I don't want to mispronounce his name again. I'll tell you, the neck breaking seems to be a theme that follows him around. It's not the kind of guy you want to go camping with. It's like, oh, that's four people I went camping with. They went home in body bags. Don't ever make that sound, Anderson. It drives me. It hurts.

53:40 Adam It's an awful sound.

53:41 Drew Yeah, it hurts my feelings that sound. It just hurts.

53:44 Caller You're biting on a fork, isn't it?

53:46 Caller Yeah, it's just something.

53:47 Drew It's been a big ball of foil or something. All right, listen, all of you who are angry and are prone to violence and aren't currently committing an act of violence and are calm and are aware you have a problem, now's the time to deal with it. Not when you're getting violent because you'll see red and you'll wake up in prison for 100 years. You know what I mean? Everybody. You really, listen, here's a good point. If you're a violent person and you're prone to violence and you have a history of violence and you're having a calm moment and you're aware of your problem, think about your next potential victim for just a second. Think about the guy who cuts you off on the freeway, you take a tire iron to his head, think about your next girlfriend, think about your kid, think about your brother or sister, whoever it is, whoever it is, you smack next or you injure or shoot or stab next. Think about that potential person and get some help now and think about yourself. Because who, you know, why the hell do you want to go to prison for doing something that you didn't even want to do? I mean, a week later or an hour later. Lee?

54:59 Yeah.

55:00 Drew You're 25.

55:01 Caller Yeah.

55:01 Drew What's up?

55:02 Caller I want to say hi to STP there. Hey man, how are you? I wish I could discuss guitar with Robert all night long, but since this is Loveline, I better get to my drug question. I wanted to ask Scott, you know, I've been to rehab three times and I can't seem to get with the program. And basically my problem is I'm not a people person and I really don't give a nass about anybody but myself. And I figured I'd ask Scott if he can give me some pointers because if anybody doesn't give a nass either, it's probably Scott.

55:35 Caller Well, I don't know. I can just tell you from my experience. You're having a hard time getting clean. You're going to rehab and you're having a hard time staying clean.

55:47 Caller From what I understand, you got to be willing to be a people person.

55:50 Caller No, not at all actually because you don't have to like, not really at all. The only thing that you have to do is sort of just become open-minded and willing to take some suggestions. It doesn't have to be from a crowd of people. It just has to be for maybe one, maybe a couple people who you relate to. That's why they suggest going to meetings and not just forming an opinion based on what your first meeting, your first few meetings, going to try a few different ones until you meet some people that are kind of like yourself. And if your life gets bad enough, trust me, if you start doing some jail terms and you start losing important relationships, having failed marriages, then you might start to be a little bit more open minded about maybe kind of listening to some of the stories that these people have. For me, I wasn't able to get clean and stay clean. And still, I don't even have a year yet. I've got over 10 months now. But the reason why is because I want to be clean now. I've had every reason pointed out the fact that I needed to be clean. And that evidence was there that I needed to be. But I really didn't want to. My life hadn't gotten to the point where I accumulated enough negative consequences where I really could not stand living that way any longer. And you know what? Once your life starts to build...

57:17 Caller It's kind of a bogus deal because I see it coming, you know? I see myself losing my job.

57:22 Drew What's your drug? What's your choice?

57:24 Caller Oh, I stick with weed mostly, but if I did anything harder I'd probably be dead by now. But you know, I get around to whatever is available, but weed's my drug of choice. I mean, that's a daily deal.

57:36 Drew Right, but so you're not at the point where you're... You haven't bottomed out yet.

57:40 Caller Right, yeah, and I see it coming, but I just don't want to get there.

57:43 Adam It's really interesting that you bring up an issue that I've struggled with with people for a long time, which I think you can summarize by asking the question, how do you give somebody get it? How do you get somebody to get it? That they need to get it, that they need to get with it, that they need to follow the direction. How do you give somebody that?

58:03 Caller Yeah, that's a big deal.

58:04 Adam And so far, there's no one that's able to give somebody that.

58:08 Caller Okay, well, you know, I kind of, I've pretty much knew the answer before I called. I just want to say hi to Scott and Robert.

58:15 Adam And by the way, I don't believe you're not a people person. You may not like groups of people, you may not like a lot of different kinds of people, but the connection you can form with somebody will be important to you.

58:25 Caller Yeah, man, if you want to get clean, you want to do it for yourself, not because of other people or, you know, you got to want to do it for yourself, like Scott said.

58:32 Drew All right, Lee, good luck. Jennifer.

58:35 yes.

58:36 Drew You're 21.

58:37 Caller Hi, Drew.

58:38 Adam Jennifer.

58:39 Caller Yeah, you probably remember me from the hospital.

58:42 Adam Which Jennifer?

58:44 Caller Oh, my, I remember her voice from the Lost in Sinus.

58:48 Yeah.

58:49 Caller She was the crazy one that was like sneaking drugs in there and getting loaded, and you kept on putting her back on, like, back on early status.

58:57 Caller I've been in rehab 40 times. I just got out of a long-term PC. Okay. And.

59:02 Drew Long-term what?

59:04 Caller Therapeutic community.

59:05 Drew Oh, I see.

59:06 Caller Where I went after I detoxed, and I'm manic depressive, and I got in an episode, and I tried to hurt myself, and they put me in the hospital, and they strapped me down, and they shot me up with Ativan, and ever since then, it's like.

59:18 Caller You're on heroin right now, aren't you?

59:20 Caller No, I'm not. You're not? No. They shot me up with Ativan, and that was my drug of choice, and I didn't like the feeling of it, and I started to use a lot of it, and so then I got my hands on Ritalin, and have been having a problem with that, and my counselor, my good counselor wants to put me back in treatment, and I'm scared to go.

59:47 Why?

59:50 Caller I just, I'm tired of treatment. I'm just, I don't feel like it works. I get my life together, and then the manic depression kicks in, and then I'm back on drugs.

1:00:01 Adam Well.

1:00:02 Caller And so I've just, and I haven't, Drew, I've become anorexic, basically. I have the tendencies. You know, I was really heavy, and I'm like a size 14 now, and I'm not eating much, and I went to a doctor and got a three month script of Speed.

1:00:22 Adam Okay. Listen, Jennifer, all I hear now is desperation and confusion. I know you feel better when you get clean, when you're in an instruction environment, when you're around people that care about you. And I know that you regain meaning, you regain a sense of yourself, and it doesn't feel so bad, it doesn't look so hopeless when you're in a different place. And I know you have...

1:00:41 Caller A systematic depression kicked in, and I wanted to...

1:00:43 Adam I understand it's there now, and I understand that needs to be managed also, but you gotta get with it, you gotta get back. You need an instruction environment. You've got people that care about you.

1:00:52 Caller Yeah, my counselor wanted to come over to my apartment and throw away my pills, and I told him I was going to, and...

1:00:59 Adam Well, I don't know that that's right, necessarily. That's sort of a boundary issue, but certainly you ought to get somewhere where you can be cared for properly.

1:01:07 Drew It says on the screen she's pregnant by a drug counselor.

1:01:11 Caller does that...

1:01:12 Drew It wasn't you, was it, Drew?

1:01:14 Caller I'm not a drug counselor.

1:01:15 Drew Well, sometimes if they can't pay, it's everyone's. Are you pregnant?

1:01:20 Caller I don't think I am right now. I thought I was.

1:01:24 Drew When you called in?

1:01:25 Caller Yeah, well, no. They weren't sure because I kept having positive tests, but then the ultrasound was inconclusive.

1:01:34 Drew Oh, baby. Hey, why...

1:01:37 Caller The guy said that he cared about me, and then he sent me an email saying that if I didn't give him certain sexual favors that I couldn't be his woman anymore.

1:01:46 Drew All right. Well, listen.

1:01:48 Caller Yeah.

1:01:49 Drew Don't worry about relationships at this particular point in your life. I mean, you worry about getting better.

1:01:53 Caller Right.

1:01:54 Drew And...

1:01:55 Caller I've been trying to get off the Ativan, and I have withdrawal from it.

1:01:58 Caller Yeah.

1:01:58 Adam Listen, you have tough withdrawal, and you need to be somewhere when you do that.

1:02:02 Drew I said, Drew, is this a patient you've seen before, something like that? Then Scott, have you seen her running around the halls?

1:02:09 Caller I was in rehab with her before when Drew treated us both.

1:02:13 Drew Oh, my God. And you just remember her name or her voice?

1:02:16 Caller No, I remember her voice totally. I know exactly what she looks like.

1:02:19 Drew And is...

1:02:21 Caller She was actually having people sneak drugs into her at the place that we were at, I remember.

1:02:30 Drew Drew, how does some people get, you know, do drugs with a vengeance? Do you know what I mean? I mean, do you have to be the product of some kind of abuse?

1:02:38 Adam No.

1:02:39 Caller No, I did drugs with a vengeance.

1:02:41 Adam Scott was amongst the best.

1:02:42 Drew Really?

1:02:43 Adam Oh, yeah.

1:02:44 Drew That's delightful. I mean, I know people have drug problems and there's people like OD and there's some people that do it, that got drive like it's a it's like a salmon going upstream kind of drive.

1:02:58 Caller Well, after a while, you know, it's kind of like it. You just have a feeling that it's coming to a really bad, bad end. And it's almost becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. And you just want to like you want to like hit that wall as fast as you possibly can. So you just almost like you purposely accelerate the process to either end it all or get or at least get to a point where you're going to have to force yourself to quit or get help. But this girl, though, I know her. Drew knows her. I really would suggest that she goes somewhere like Drew said and get medically detoxed and then go to a long-term treatment place like either Impact House or Cry Help because she got a lot of issues to deal with.

1:03:40 Caller Obviously, she's saying the manic depressions kicks in. She's obviously using the drugs to replace something that isn't there or, you know, she wants to be there. So what is the source of her manic depression?

1:03:58 Caller It's hard to tell until she gets clean for a while.

1:04:00 Adam She has a brain injury and she has had to be on lots of medicines to stabilize that and that's one of her problems is her manic depressive is so awful.

1:04:10 Caller It just decompensates really easily.

1:04:13 Drew All right. We're going to take a little break. Stone Temple Pilots are here, and we'll be back after this. Well, it's worth hearing. There you go, Love Line. Best of the best of the best of Love Line. And that was the old and in with the new.

1:04:43 Adam This is the night of the nicest people we've ever had also.

1:04:46 Drew yes, this next gent is one of the friendliest guys we've ever had on the show. You know him from That 70s Show, Wilmer Valderrama. Hey, yo, Loveline, I'm Adam, that's Drew. Wilmer Valderrama is our guest tonight. He is from That 70s Show. He is Fez. I like that Fez voice.

1:05:10 Adam yes, you do. It's actually a little distracting with his normal voice with an accent.

1:05:15 Caller The Venezuelan accent is like, wait a minute, it's not quite right.

1:05:20 Drew Do people expect you to sound like Fez?

1:05:22 Caller Oh, yeah, all the time, all the time. In fact, sometimes they look at me and they're like, is that that guy from The 70s Show? And then they hear me speak, they're like, nah.

1:05:32 Drew Yeah, but do you get like, you got a lot of people requesting that you do like outgoing messages?

1:05:38 Adam Fez Medley.

1:05:40 Caller It was like, I became actually good friends with Carlos Salasrachi, who does the voice for the Taco Bell commercial, the Taco Bell dog.

1:05:48 Drew Yeah.

1:05:50 Caller And I was going to say, he did every single one of his friends, you know, and then once my friends found that out, they're like, brilliant, let's do the same.

1:06:00 Caller And I'm like, great.

1:06:01 Caller And then this time say whore. I'm like, awesome.

1:06:03 Drew Yeah. Yeah. Real filthy drunken Fez. And here's a Fez fan now. Brandi?

1:06:10 Hi.

1:06:11 Drew Hey, you're 13. What's up?

1:06:13 Caller Nothing much here. I have a question. Do you like being on the 70s show?

1:06:20 Caller Yeah. I have a great time in the show. You know, all of us all of us started really fairly new to the industry and to the show. So all of us became really good friends, like brothers and sisters. And we just we just have a great time working. It's a lot of fun. Everybody's really nice, too. So I mean, it's a dream.

1:06:37 Adam Think about it. I think about the careers of each of the young people in the show. I mean, Topher came out of like nowhere. Right.

1:06:44 Drew Yeah. And it's not a bunch of jaded, burnt out, prima donna sitcom stars that they're having to pay alimony on their fourth marriage.

1:06:54 Caller Yeah.

1:06:54 Drew They need a gig.

1:06:56 Caller Yeah. We don't let we don't let any of that, you know, behavior, you know, you know, like not. I think when everybody starts pulling something funny, whatever everybody calls them on, so everybody's just really grounded. And and and it's just it's just a great atmosphere. It's starting from the director, David Treanor, you know, who's I think he's been with us since the second episode of the show. So he knows the inside of every single one of the characters and all that. And and then, you know, and then needless to say, every single one of the kids on the show just truly appreciates and respects each other's, you know, jobs and as professionals. And and we trust each other with everything. So it's it's become a great, great atmosphere. And, you know, the show is is took took off so slowly, you know, and it's such a solid place now. And that's, you know, thanks to the fact that the fans stayed with us, you know, and all that stuff. And you know, we held it together and we just had a great time.

1:07:46 Caller So so yeah, about it.

1:07:49 Caller You know, I like I like the writing. I like I like the people. I like the characters. You know, every single one of the characters are very different from each other. So and somehow at the end of the day, they're still best friends. And they have their differences, but not, you know, not to the point where like they're going to see what you don't what you don't know.

1:08:07 Adam Wilmer is that Adam, I live with people like this. We live that 70s show. That's great. And you think these characters are sort of over the top. We consider them kind of understated.

1:08:16 Drew Yeah, they go far enough with the fashion.

1:08:18 Adam Yeah, the fashion, the hair got to go much further.

1:08:21 Caller Yeah, but I just, I love being part of the team. And it's a great atmosphere and the, you know, people like it a lot. And we're just happy to be, the reality is that we just, we're just very happy to have a job.

1:08:31 Drew You mentioned the slow build part. And we were just talking the other night about how a lot of sitcoms aren't, they don't have time to breathe either develop or really transform in anything or find an energy about it. I think we're talking to Jeremy Piven about this and about his show Cupid that got canceled quickly. But some of these sitcoms, like I guess what I'm saying is, is in a way that I think the timing was good because if that 70s show had been on ABC four or five years ago, it may have lasted a few episodes, may not have found the audience, and they may have pulled the plug, and we wouldn't be sitting here talking right now. You're back in Venezuela picking bees.

1:09:13 Caller Exactly. Right.

1:09:15 Drew Tilling soil. Tilling soil. Swimming where water shouldn't be. But I think it was good timing as far as what Fox was trying to do. They were starting to build, and they were probably willing to stick with it a little longer.

1:09:30 Caller Fox had a lot of faith in us. We got changed from time sludge to time sludge to time sludge and time sludge, and we were very surprised at the cult that was following the show and the audience were actually following us to every time slide because that was basically what kills the show. Switching to time sludge because people just forget about it.

1:09:49 Adam I think shows that are targeted at younger audiences, they're watching it on TiVo and stuff anyway.

1:09:55 Drew Well, I think they can move around probably more than Matlock could have. Because the Matlock fans that are in their late 90s, early hundreds would watch these murder, she wrote whatever. If it wasn't on the time, they thought it was going to be on, they get pissed off. But it's like if their TV dinner shows up four minutes late, they get angry.

1:10:15 Adam Well, that's the diagnosis murder crowd.

1:10:17 Drew Right. Yeah. You know, you ever talk to old people like I'd get into this, even my dad is now getting into this where it's like you go, I'll come over at, I'll come over about eight o'clock, we'll do dinner. I eat at six, ten. All right. Well, eat a late lunch. I'll be there. I don't eat at eight. I can't eat. It's like you can't eat at eight o'clock. I could eat dinner at six if I had to and I could do it at 1030. But when you get old, you get locked into that crap. I have pinto beans and Pepsi. I eat it at 608 every night. I have a firm bowel movement at 633. I contemplate suicide. I ask myself where my life has gone. Then I take my Metamucil and I pass out in front of the seven o'clock late news. Yeah, that's my dad's life. All right. Robin?

1:11:13 Caller yes.

1:11:13 Drew You're 20?

1:11:14 Caller Yeah.

1:11:15 Drew What's up?

1:11:16 Caller Well, my question was basically when belly button piercings are supposed to heal.

1:11:23 Caller What's average?

1:11:25 Adam I don't know that, but I do know that they are one of the most common sites to reject. So if you get a lot of oozing and redness and that stuff in that area, irritation, you may just be rejecting.

1:11:36 Caller Okay.

1:11:37 Caller Would the sea salt actually help it?

1:11:39 Adam No. Really? If you're rejecting, you're rejecting. You got to get it out. And if it's been more than a couple of weeks, you're still getting a big reaction. You also get terrible infections. We've seen a couple of bad ones.

1:11:49 Caller I went to the doctor. They gave me a Bactroban.

1:11:52 Adam Yeah. Bactroban. If it's an infection, we'll take care of it. But if it's a rejection, that's it.

1:11:57 Caller Okay.

1:11:58 Caller All right.

1:11:59 Caller Oh, and I had a comment for Adam.

1:12:01 Drew yes.

1:12:02 Caller Okay.

1:12:04 Caller Construction workers as opposed to truck drivers.

1:12:07 Caller Where are they?

1:12:09 Drew It's tough calls. Construction workers are basically truck drivers without wheels. Same breed, just not as mobile.

1:12:17 Adam Same guy?

1:12:18 Drew Yeah. Same dude.

1:12:20 Adam Why are you asking, Robin?

1:12:21 Drew They just had too many 502s. They got their license taken away.

1:12:25 Adam They can't maintain.

1:12:26 Drew They can't maintain, dude.

1:12:27 Adam Or they don't like speed.

1:12:28 Drew Why? You're dating a construction guy?

1:12:30 Caller No, I work at a truck stop.

1:12:32 Drew Oh, okay.

1:12:33 Caller Yeah.

1:12:33 Adam Where are you calling from?

1:12:35 Caller Kansas.

1:12:36 Adam You will.

1:12:36 Caller Where?

1:12:38 Caller I'd rather not say.

1:12:40 Drew I see. What do you do at the truck stop?

1:12:42 Caller Just basically cashier.

1:12:44 Drew What's a big move in product over there?

1:12:49 Caller You seriously want to know?

1:12:50 Caller Yeah.

1:12:52 Drew What do you sell a lot? Tourist stuff. What's that?

1:12:55 Caller Tourist thing.

1:12:56 Kansas magnets, Kansas key chains, Kansas this, Kansas that.

1:13:00 Drew Oh, really?

1:13:01 Adam Tourist.

1:13:01 Yeah.

1:13:01 Drew You sell that to truck drivers?

1:13:03 Not truck drivers.

1:13:04 Adam What do truck drivers buy?

1:13:06 Caller Oh, oil, diesel.

1:13:10 Drew Life in the fast lane. All right, baby.

1:13:12 Yeah.

1:13:13 Drew I'll tell you, it's quite a vivid picture you paint there.

1:13:16 Caller Yeah.

1:13:16 Drew diesel.

1:13:17 Adam Oil. Oil. 1040.

1:13:20 Drew What about you guys sell those things that plug into the cigarette lighter? The sandwich maker, the hot thermos and that stuff?

1:13:29 Caller We sold a stove.

1:13:30 Caller We had a TV that had one of those.

1:13:32 Drew Plugged into the cigarette lighter?

1:13:35 Adam That's quite reassuring. I think a truck driver is watching TV.

1:13:38 Drew Oh, yeah. What's that?

1:13:40 Caller You wouldn't believe how many of those sell.

1:13:42 Drew The TV that you plug into the cigarette lighter?

1:13:45 Caller Everything that plugs into the cigarette lighter.

1:13:47 Adam That's the point.

1:13:48 Caller Yeah.

1:13:49 Drew All right. All right, baby.

1:13:51 Caller Thanks.

1:13:52 Drew All right. Quite seem to know what we're getting at, don't you? All right. But why should things change? Jen, you're 20. What's up?

1:14:03 Caller I'm 20. Okay, this is my problem. Okay, so I go out with this guy I like, and we get drunk, we go out to a club or anything, we get back to the house, and we're starting to have sex and everything, and he loses it. Is it just like a drunk thing or is it me? I mean, I just don't understand.

1:14:21 Adam Every guy loses it at some time or another. You're fat.

1:14:27 Drew Well, tell that to his penis.

1:14:29 Adam And it's never happened before with you?

1:14:31 Caller No, it's never happened before at all.

1:14:33 Adam Well, it will happen again.

1:14:35 Caller It will happen again?

1:14:36 Adam yes, because men have eventually some point in their life this happens.

1:14:40 Drew If you do not learn to douche, it will happen again. No, it's not that I don't learn to douche.

1:14:46 Caller Is that what I'm drunk?

1:14:48 Adam Jen, not everything in the world has to do with you. Okay, let's start with that. And this is something that has, if it has anything to do with you, guys get a little bit anxious if there's some aggressiveness or.

1:14:59 Caller I mean, it was a new thing. It was our first time ever, you know.

1:15:02 Adam Yeah, and maybe it was his first time ever ever.

1:15:05 Drew You were drunk and you were getting on him and he was getting a little self-conscious and.

1:15:10 Adam That's it.

1:15:11 Drew He had a little difficulty.

1:15:12 Caller It's not a big deal.

1:15:13 Adam No, it's nothing to do.

1:15:14 Caller It's not me, I'm not, yeah, okay.

1:15:16 Drew Yeah, well, you know, you were there.

1:15:18 Caller It couldn't be me.

1:15:20 Adam It couldn't be her.

1:15:21 Drew Right.

1:15:23 Caller And then, you know, he's so sorry and I'm just like, well, what's next?

1:15:27 Adam You know, did you get angry with him?

1:15:29 Caller No, it's not that I got angry. I was just kind of irritated. It makes you feel that it's your fault. But I mean, I'm guessing I've talked to other people.

1:15:35 Drew See, Jen, this is the worst thing that can happen to a penis, which is Jen.

1:15:40 Adam Yeah.

1:15:41 Caller I mean, it feels bad for them.

1:15:42 Adam Listen, listen, just listen to Adam.

1:15:44 Drew Yeah, it's their fault, right?

1:15:46 Adam Yeah.

1:15:46 Caller Yeah, okay.

1:15:47 Adam Just listen to him.

1:15:48 Drew Listen, you must be good-looking.

1:15:50 Caller I am.

1:15:51 Drew Because you're such a pain in the ass.

1:15:53 Caller I'm not.

1:15:53 Drew yes, yes, you don't even listen to yourself. Good-looking people don't have the ability to hear themselves. You understand that?

1:16:00 Caller You tell women that Megan owes her a cigarette.

1:16:04 Caller All right, I'll tell them.

1:16:05 Caller Okay.

1:16:06 Drew All right there, baby. All right. See, see, that's definitely the talk of a good-looking chick. They just, it's all about them. They have no ability to hear themselves.

1:16:19 Adam Well, they can't empathize with somebody else. No. Zero empathy.

1:16:23 Drew No. Boy, what a pain in the ass she was. Oh, it's going to be great when she gets old and ugly.

1:16:28 Best Of It's going to be great.

1:16:30 Drew That is the great equalizer. Yeah, it's great when God does that. Yeah. I'm going to call her back in about 15 years.

1:16:39 Caller She'll just start laughing.

1:16:42 Drew She'll laugh. It's very humbling for women too. That's what I enjoy. But you imagine with this drunken pain in the ass, yelling at you, chewing gum in your ear, you might have a little difficulty with the penis as well.

1:16:53 Adam Right, Drew?

1:16:54 Drew Even a passionate man like yourself.

1:16:59 Adam The thing is that even though her first hint of difficulty, should be onion, that'd be a poom.

1:17:03 Drew Right. So anyway, happens to the best of them. He probably had a few too many drinks. Let's talk to Nick. Nick is 16. Nick?

1:17:12 Hey. Lately, especially, I've been having really scary sexual thoughts and fantasies, especially directed toward younger girls. It's really scary and disturbing for me.

1:17:25 Adam Did something happen to you when you were younger?

1:17:27 No. That's why it's scary for me.

1:17:29 Adam Do you believe that you're likely to act on these impulses?

1:17:32 I feel like if I don't get help or something later in life, I might.

1:17:35 Adam All right. So why don't you get some help?

1:17:37 Because whenever I try to talk to my therapist about it, he doesn't want to talk about it. He wants to focus on like other stuff.

1:17:44 Adam Like what?

1:17:45 Like when I want to kill people or hurt other people in other ways, or like I'm antisocial or whatever.

1:17:53 Adam So you have the diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder?

1:17:56 I've had OCD.

1:17:58 Adam Because antisocial at 16, that's sort of a harsh diagnosis to be walking around with.

1:18:03 Well, it's not, I wasn't actually diagnosed as it. He just says like.

1:18:07 Adam You have antisocial features?

1:18:10 Yeah, I guess.

1:18:11 Drew All right.

1:18:11 Adam Well, I'm sure there's a reason they're keeping you focused in other areas. Again, it's about learning to regulate these feelings and the way people are able to regulate these kinds of aggressive fantasies and aggressive impulses is by using other people, by being being present, not killing other people. No, by accepting the presence of another person's, their system to attune to your is to help you sort of bring these impulses under control.

1:18:38 Drew But Nick, you're in therapy and you're talking to your therapist about this stuff and that's about half the battle. Yeah. I mean, does anyone want you to get on some medication?

1:18:52 I've been on lots of things. None of them have really worked.

1:18:56 Drew Okay. Well, here's the problem. And I know it's tough at 16, but this is unfortunately, it's a long protracted journey that you have to go on with this therapy, especially if you have serious problems. But you don't really have a choice. And it's not the kind of thing where you can try it for four months and go, well, it didn't take.

1:19:16 Adam Right.

1:19:17 Drew Moving on to killing and raping. You can't do that. You just have to stay with it.

1:19:21 Best Of You have to stay focused on it.

1:19:23 Adam It's not going to be a long term thing for him. Just like if he had any other chronic condition.

1:19:26 Drew Yeah.

1:19:27 Adam You got to stay with it. If he had diabetes, he'd be seeing a doctor regularly.

1:19:30 Drew Right. This is dialysis, right?

1:19:32 Adam This is diabetes of the brain. Right.

1:19:34 Drew All right. So stay with it, Nick. And stay with your therapist and keep talking to him. And if you want to talk about something that's important and he doesn't think it's important, then tell him it's important.

1:19:44 Adam Right.

1:19:44 Drew We'll take a break. We'll be right back. It is the best of the best of Loveline. We say adieu to our very dear friend, Wilmer Valderrama, and welcome our dear, dear friend, Carmen Electra. Hey everybody, it's Loveline. I'm Adam Carolla, that's Dr. Drew. Phone number 1-800-LOVE-191. Carmen Electra is our guest tonight. John?

1:20:32 Yeah?

1:20:32 Drew You're 15?

1:20:34 Caller Oh, hello?

1:20:35 Drew Hello.

1:20:36 Oh, hey, what's up?

1:20:37 Drew Hey.

1:20:37 Hey, I got problems. I think my girlfriend may be a gold digger.

1:20:42 Adam What does that mean when you're 15?

1:20:44 Caller 15, well, it means that she's taking me for all my money.

1:20:47 Adam Well, at 15, I imagine he's got a lot to give.

1:20:50 Drew Oh, yeah. He's got a moped, he's got a retainer, he's got video games.

1:20:56 Adam What are we talking about here? What does this mean?

1:20:58 Caller Well, anyway, I recently got a job at McDonald's towards the beginning of the summer. That's where I got most of my income from. My boss has been giving me pretty steady hours, blah, blah, blah, blah. Anyway, she was training Susie, my girlfriend. She had been training me in there.

1:21:14 Drew Susie? Susie is what?

1:21:17 Caller Susie.

1:21:18 Drew Hold on a second. Hold on. I got to evaluate this. I'm in a bad mood tonight because I was up.

1:21:23 Adam No kidding.

1:21:23 Drew I was up all night. Oh, shut up. You'll be fine.

1:21:27 Adam You'll be all right.

1:21:28 Drew But he's 15, he works at McDonald's, he's calling his girlfriend a gold digger. Is he serious? Do you think he's serious about this?

1:21:37 Adam He thinks she is using his money. Yeah. What?

1:21:40 Caller What money?

1:21:42 Adam I was just about to tell us.

1:21:45 Drew Whatever he makes, she spends. Is that the way it's going to go?

1:21:48 Adam Yeah.

1:21:48 Even if it's not much, she spends it.

1:21:50 Adam I just want to.

1:21:51 All right.

1:21:51 Adam John.

1:21:51 Caller My phone is running out of battery. I'm going to have to switch the phone.

1:21:55 Drew All right. See, it's good that I take those little breaks. yes. And run everyone's battery out. Should we put them on hold and talk to someone else? yes. And then we'll get back to them. I'm very interested in the gold digging part. And I at 15 worked at McDonald's, by the way. With Brandon?

1:22:10 Adam A fan of Carmen's here.

1:22:12 Drew Brandon?

1:22:13 Caller Yeah. Yeah.

1:22:15 Drew You like Carmen?

1:22:16 Caller Yeah.

1:22:17 Drew Yeah. Showing the world. What's up?

1:22:21 Caller Nothing much.

1:22:22 Caller Just watching. Half baked.

1:22:26 Drew Good. That's a very positive movie for a 13 year old.

1:22:30 Adam Are you really 13?

1:22:31 Caller Yeah.

1:22:32 Sounds really young.

1:22:34 Caller You're not young.

1:22:35 You're not.

1:22:36 Caller I'm sick.

1:22:37 Adam You're sick.

1:22:38 Oh, you're sick.

1:22:39 Adam That's what you sound like when you're sick, Adam.

1:22:41 Caller The cold.

1:22:42 Drew I sound like Vern Troyer when I'm sick.

1:22:45 Caller Yeah.

1:22:46 Drew Yeah. Man, I don't think his nads have dropped yet, Drew.

1:22:51 Caller Yeah.

1:22:52 Drew So you like Carmen?

1:22:54 Caller Yeah.

1:22:54 Drew Yeah. You want to say anything to her?

1:22:56 Caller Yeah. I was wondering, do you like acting or modeling better?

1:23:01 I actually like both a lot, but I started to take acting classes after, like I did everything backwards. I ended up getting jobs and then I just recently started taking acting classes. So I'm really into acting now. I love it.

1:23:15 Drew Yeah. Modeling seems sort of like it might get boring. I mean, except for the booze and the coke and crazy fags running around.

1:23:23 It's hard to think of new poses after a while. Like, haven't I done this one before?

1:23:27 Drew Yeah. Yeah. That's what happened with me. That's when I knew it was time to step off the runway. And that's when you know, when you run out of poses. I did like, I did the watch one. I did the one where I checked my watch. You know, all at the end.

1:23:44 Adam The other one where you work on your sleeve.

1:23:45 Drew I did the check the watch. Yeah, I did the cuff.

1:23:47 I did the cuff tug.

1:23:49 Drew Cuff tug was mine. The watch one, I don't know who, that wasn't mine. I'll be up front with you, but I made it mine. And I did the, hey, what's over there on the horizon? Look, you know, as sort of hand, you know, right hand on the hip, left hand pointing to, you know, I called it the Tally Ho. That caught on. A lot of guys still doing that. I even did, I did one where I checked some plans and looked up. That was a nice move. I'd go out there, I'd roll out some blueprints, I'd look down at them and then look up and freeze, you know, as if I was standing on the plot of land that I was going to construct the skyscraper bridge on, looking down, looking down.

1:24:27 Caller Very intensely.

1:24:28 Drew Hold on. Beat, beat, beat, beat, looking down, beat, an extra beat, now looking up, Crowdy Rocks.

1:24:36 Caller Wow.

1:24:36 Drew Yeah, yeah, that's my move. That's my song. The song is a lot of bouncing, a lot of bouncing. And I used to be able to walk in slow motion. And I'd be bouncing and I'd have this, you know, I'd have the jacket slung over the shoulder. And then sometimes I'd go into a little modified karate move at the end if there was enough ladies, you know, up front, you gotta give them what they want.

1:24:56 Adam Of course. Yeah, not just the cuff and the watch.

1:24:59 Caller Yeah, yeah.

1:25:01 Drew John?

1:25:02 Caller Yeah.

1:25:03 Drew So anyway, you got that gold-digging girlfriend.

1:25:06 Caller Quote-unquote gold-digging, yeah.

1:25:08 Drew Yeah, you're working at McDonald's.

1:25:10 Caller Working at McDonald's, yeah.

1:25:11 Drew What's minimum wage these days? Is it like $6.25 or something?

1:25:15 Caller $5.15.

1:25:17 Drew $5.15?

1:25:18 Caller $5.15 an hour.

1:25:19 Drew All right. And you have to punch in after you get changed into your, into your gi? Yeah.

1:25:27 Caller Well, I get changed to home and I kind of walk over there.

1:25:31 Drew Oh, so you walk over in the outfit.

1:25:33 Adam That must be comfortable.

1:25:34 Caller It's smooth. It's real dignifying, too.

1:25:36 Adam yes, yes.

1:25:37 Drew Really? You don't want to just walk over in the t-shirt and pull the polyester smock on after you get in the safe confines of McDonald's. You got to walk over in the crazy brown outfit.

1:25:48 Caller Well, it's blue, you know.

1:25:49 Adam Oh, they've changed them, Adam. That's 30 years ago you were there.

1:25:53 Drew Where's the time gone?

1:25:55 Caller Well, pretty much is. I can't go in the bathroom and change because people tend to crap on the walls.

1:26:01 Caller Well, that's nice.

1:26:02 Drew Wait, hold on.

1:26:03 Adam He's in Manhattan.

1:26:05 Drew They crap on the wall. What is this guy talking?

1:26:07 Adam I know. You're asking all the retarded questions.

1:26:09 Drew I don't really believe this guy. John?

1:26:11 Caller Yeah?

1:26:12 Drew I find you... I'm totally serious. I know, but you're annoying me.

1:26:16 Caller Let's get to the question.

1:26:18 Caller Why?

1:26:19 Adam Get to the question.

1:26:21 Drew Don't you want to punch, John?

1:26:22 Adam No, he's 15.

1:26:23 Caller How am I going to talk to her? Out of constantly making me spend money?

1:26:28 Adam What does she make you spend money on?

1:26:29 Caller Well, stupid crap, like stuffed animals, going to the movies and buying tons of candy and soda and things like that.

1:26:38 Caller Just say no.

1:26:40 Adam Either that, John, you just better get used to this. Because it ain't stopping with her.

1:26:44 Drew It's better to make more money, that should be your plan.

1:26:46 Adam At least she hasn't started with the things that spoil, flowers and things that really do hurt you.

1:26:52 Drew Yeah. She's not getting into jewelry or like $800 purses or ridiculous shoes or anything.

1:26:58 Adam But even the picnics and the special meals and the buy me flowers, she's being light on him.

1:27:05 Caller Well, besides that, is there any way that I can actually get some action off her? All right.

1:27:12 Drew Now, yeah. I know I wanted to talk to him, but he wasn't bogus from the word go.

1:27:18 Caller yes.

1:27:19 Drew Or is every guy from New York a jack-off?

1:27:21 Adam That's 15, yeah.

1:27:22 Drew Is every guy from New York a jack-off? I haven't met a guy from New York that's not a jack-off. What is that?

1:27:30 Adam What happens?

1:27:32 Drew It's a whole city, a whole state of jack-offs.

1:27:36 Adam People live too close together, they lose their sense of humor.

1:27:40 Drew I don't know. I know a bunch of guys more recently from New York, from comedy and writing and all that kind of stuff, and they're friends, and they're nice guys, and they're certainly entertaining. They're much more entertaining than guys from Orange County. It's like, you want to hang out? I'll tell you what, it's more exciting to hang out with a Styrofoam cooler than it is to hang out with one of these idiots from Orange County.

1:28:06 Adam That's what the New York guys would say. They have culture, they have character.

1:28:10 Drew They would just, yeah, I don't know about the culture part. But the point is, the guys from out here, their head has just been baked by too much weed and the sun. The sun has fried the outer part of their brain. The inner core is still pink and soft, but the outer is charred. It's got grill marks on it. Everyone out here is just stupid. But over there, they're smartasses. Everyone's a jack-off. Everyone's a smartass. This kid's 15. He's just totally annoying. He's calling and jangling. Yeah, she's doing crap on the thing.

1:28:42 Caller I could hear you.

1:28:44 Drew Everyone I met is that way from New York. What is that? A big town full of a-holes. Still better than the people from out here, I think. But it's got to be, I don't know, maybe Oregon. Where could we move, Drew? Carmen, where could we move?

1:28:57 Caller Seattle. Hawaii.

1:28:59 Drew We'll go to Hawaii.

1:29:00 Caller Go to Hawaii and relax.

1:29:01 Drew Those people are so stupid. God, are those people stupid.

1:29:06 Caller Mahalo.

1:29:06 Drew They're dumber than the Orange County people. Yeah.

1:29:10 Caller Michael?

1:29:11 Caller Yeah.

1:29:12 Drew You're 14?

1:29:13 Caller Yeah.

1:29:13 Drew What's up?

1:29:15 Caller You're talking about Dave Navarro has all those nipple rings.

1:29:18 Drew yes.

1:29:18 Caller Well, I just want to tell you that people shouldn't really wear nipple rings because they can get infections like my grandpa has a nipple ring. And he got it when he was young and he still wears it. And he got this infection in it. His nipples all like get messed up now.

1:29:32 Drew Is your grandfather a pirate? Because that's the only logical explanation I can think for a man of that age having a nipple ring.

1:29:41 Caller Well, what's what he got?

1:29:43 Caller He could be 29. How old is your grandma?

1:29:45 Drew He got it when he was really young?

1:29:47 Caller Yeah. He still wears it.

1:29:48 Drew Yeah. I'm saying you're making my point.

1:29:51 Adam Yeah. Only pirates a long time ago had nipple rings.

1:29:54 Caller No, I don't think so.

1:29:55 Adam How old is he now?

1:29:56 Caller He's only like 80.

1:29:57 Adam He's 80 with a nipple ring?

1:30:00 Drew No, he's not 80. It's not 80. How old is your mom?

1:30:04 Caller About like 30, 35 maybe.

1:30:07 Adam So he must be about 60?

1:30:09 Caller No.

1:30:10 Adam 70?

1:30:10 Drew Whose father is he? Your mom's or your dad's?

1:30:13 Caller That's my dad's.

1:30:14 Drew How old is your dad?

1:30:15 Caller I don't know.

1:30:17 Drew You don't have a rough estimate on your dad's age?

1:30:21 Caller No, not really.

1:30:22 Drew Okay. Somewhere between, let's say, 20 and 70?

1:30:27 Caller Yeah, probably.

1:30:28 Drew Probably?

1:30:29 Caller Yeah.

1:30:30 Adam How about between 30 and 70?

1:30:31 Drew You don't want to commit to that though, but is it fair chance he's between 20 and 70?

1:30:34 Adam He could be 15, I guess.

1:30:36 Caller There's a pretty good chance.

1:30:38 Drew But there's an off chance that he's either 19 or 71?

1:30:42 Caller Yeah.

1:30:44 Drew All right. Fair enough.

1:30:45 Adam Fair enough. So either he was born after you and before his dad?

1:30:52 Caller Well, seriously, I think he's older than my mom.

1:30:55 Drew Your dad?

1:30:56 Caller Yeah. He got divorced when I was like two or three.

1:30:58 Drew All right, buddy. So your grandfather, now where did he get that nipple ring? Do you know?

1:31:02 Caller No. I don't even know why he got it. He just said he got it when he was young.

1:31:05 Drew Did he show it to you?

1:31:07 Caller Yeah, once.

1:31:08 Adam Is it just a hoop?

1:31:10 Caller Yeah, it's just a hoop. It's really nasty too. He says nipples are huge.

1:31:14 Caller It is grand and beautiful.

1:31:19 Drew Was he in a war, your grandfather? No, no, no wars.

1:31:25 Caller No, I'm pretty sure he wasn't.

1:31:27 Adam Prisoner of war?

1:31:27 Drew Did he do any traveling? Did he go to any exotic places? Yeah, he went to Europe a lot. Was he a merchant marine or something?

1:31:35 Caller I don't know.

1:31:36 Caller I don't know a lot about him. He's my dad's father.

1:31:39 Drew I see. He's your dad's father, so you wouldn't know. Okay, buddy. I didn't know he was your dad's. Yeah, his dad's father.

1:31:45 Adam They divorced and his windows went down.

1:31:47 Caller All right. All right.

1:31:48 Drew And when's the last time you saw his nipple?

1:31:50 Caller Yeah.

1:31:51 Drew When?

1:31:51 Caller Yeah. It was nasty. Like 10.

1:31:54 Adam Ten.

1:31:54 Drew Ten, you saw his nipple.

1:31:56 Adam Four years ago.

1:31:56 Drew All right.

1:31:57 Caller I was scared.

1:31:58 Drew All right there, buddy. Take care of yourself, all right? Got it. I don't know if Michael was a bogus caller or not, but he didn't really sweat the details.

1:32:09 Adam I think it was.

1:32:10 Drew But you know what I liked about Michael? For a guy who was doing a bogus call, he had a lot of bravado. He wasn't doing any backpedaling. How old was dad? I don't know.

1:32:18 Caller Your grandfather?

1:32:20 Drew 80, 90, 200.

1:32:21 Adam It wasn't bravado, it was assertiveness. Bravado is flipping. He was just persistent.

1:32:30 Drew Well, yeah, that was stupidity meets assertiveness.

1:32:34 Adam Okay, I'll give it that.

1:32:35 Drew Because there's really, he's assertive. That's what propels him. That's what keeps him moving forward. But the stupid part is the part where he doesn't do any of the math on any of the answers. He's more focused on moving forward. This is, it's as if-

1:32:51 Adam It's assertive.

1:32:51 Drew If he did that like a supermarket sweepstakes show, he'd be pushing his cart down the aisle and throwing things over the cart onto the floor and then pushing it further. He's moving forward, but nothing's really happening. He's not, he's not sweating the detail.

1:33:06 Adam He's too, too assertive.

1:33:08 Drew Too assertive, yeah.

1:33:09 Adam That's good.

1:33:10 Drew All right, you want to take a break? yes. Well, there you go, the best of the best of Loveline. I want to thank Stone Temple Pilots, Donatius Dee, Linkin Park, Wilmer, Carmen, too much of all our dear friends. Fantastic. So until next time, this is Adam Carolla for Dr. Drew saying Mahalo.

1:34:02 Caller This has been Loveline.

1:34:06 Caller The opinions expressed on this show are not necessarily those of the staff, management, sponsors, or this station.

1:34:14 Drew The producer for Loveline is Aningold.

1:34:16 Caller Loveline is a presentation of westwood One Entertainment.

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Wednesday, December 29, 2004